#no way am i tagging all the characters actually

[tofixtheshadows]

You guys really need to stop and consider the ways you're talking about Kabru I am dead fucking serious. Like I know that flattening characters is just what fandom does to a certain extent, but Kabru's actual personality is getting lost to the fandom hivemind insisting that he's aggressive/cruel/sociopathic/hateful, and these are particularly concerning takes to see leveled at the only brown character in the main cast day after day. "My poor sweet golden child Laios needs to be protected from this scary brown man" is not a good look! Like, it's very telling that the bulk of the hate and bad faith readings are reserved for Toshiro and Kabru. Everyone else's flaws get to be discussed and validated and forgiven (or erased), meanwhile people are straight making up things to be mad about with Toshiro and Kabru but patting themselves on the back for being smart.

The worst part is how undeserved it all is. I'm trying to lay off anime-onlys because we're still kind of in the red herring stage of getting to know Kabru, but I would still like to gently suggest that even if you think Kabru is up to something, you don't gave to get in the tags of every fan creator's post and bring up how you hate him or You Can Tell he's totally evil. Sometimes I think Kabru's blue eyes give people license to say things about his appearance that they know would sound completely racist otherwise, but referring to his blue eyes acts as a get-out-of-racism free card. The jokes about the dog with brown contacts are getting old, by the way.

For people who have read the manga, it's disappointing. Kabru is one of the most complex and important characters in the story, and if you base your interpretation of him and all your fandom interactions on shallow first impressions you are completely missing out.

I know part of this is because Dungeon Meshi is a comedy, but the story also wants to be taken seriously. For example, it's admittedly really funny when Chilchuck calls Laios "sick in the head", but that doesn't change the fact that the way Chilchuck casually belittles Laios caused him to hide the fact that he was "hallucinating" from his friends for weeks. Those feelings matter.

Like, this

is funny.

But this?

Is not. This is just a very clear example of a brown boy with PTSD. As someone else with PTSD, just looking at this fucking sucks, man.

The only reason why Kabru thinks about killing Laios is because he is in the middle of a flashback. He's struggling through a panic attack. If he truly wanted to kill Laios because he's violent or because he finds Laios inherently annoying, he wouldn't otherwise talk with Laios normally. Notice how he doesn't act this way at any other point in the story- it's just because he's triggered by monsters. Even when he's thinking about his plans to "deal with" Laios later, he's reluctant to actually kill him and only considers it to prevent another tragedy. Despite his deadly skills, Kabru relies far more on "soft" power- insight, persuasion, diplomacy. He's a rare example of a character who absolutely is, or at least can be, manipulative, but seems to use his abilities for good. He's not a pathological liar, he isn't looking down on everyone behind a smile. He's someone who is extremely emotionally intelligent, and he's willing to put aside all his own basic wants and needs to stop the cycle of dungeons devouring humans.

I'm going to cut a potential thesis on his character short and just give some examples of things that fandom should consider about his personality more:

Racism in fandom isn't just about whitewashing in fan art, or using racial slurs. The insidiousness of bad faith readings, reductions to racist tropes, lack of fan content for characters of color, and dismissal of a character's complexity are far more common. You can believe yourself to be completely neutral or even positive about a character and still churn out low-grade bile about them into fandom's collective unconscious. Fandom reflects real life.

And I have been around fandom long enough to see how these behaviors (mostly from my fellow white fans) affect fans of color, how it makes a fandom feel hostile and unwelcome to them. It's fun to make jokes and memes, I'm absolutely not saying that everything needs to be a deeply nuanced take, but we need to be careful that it doesn't veer into toxicity. Please think about how our contributions to fandom come across, and what sort of vibes they cultivate in this communal space.

#Dungeon Meshi #Kabru #Kabru of Utaya #Dungeon Meshi meta #I'm putting it in the tag. I'm making you look at it. #if you come into my inbox to bitch about this just know that people used to send me b*heading videos in there for similar racist reasons #so I will not be impressed #I'm in a fucking time loop someone get me out!!!! #musings with Dea

[fantasyandshit]

Replaced part two

Omg I’m so upset- it won’t let me tag like anyone with dashes in their name at allll soooo if you commented on that post I am so so so sorry I couldn’t tag you guys

Type: one shot turned more

Part: 2/2

Part 1 here

Masterlist here

Pairing: Azriel x reader/ mystery character x reader

Seriously guys thank you so much- I’m so glad that the first part had so much love and I hope this one is just as good.

“So, what did you need my love?” I lean down to kiss my fiancés temple. He’s stressed, I can tell. His fingers tap away in rhythm with his foot. “Baby- what’s going on? Why are you so stressed?” My hands run down the length of his arms in a soothing motion. “How can I help you?”

The new high lord of autumn’s head meets my shoulder, a small smile gracing his lips. His head raises till his lips meet mine in a soft kiss. “Baby I need you to sit down.” His smile disappears as soon as it came and I frown, moving to the seat on the other side of his desk. I raise my brows expectantly as his hands move to reach mine. “Love- we have a high lords meeting in two weeks time. They have requested it be held here in order to see how I’m handling the court now.”

“Ok? And?”

“Darling I want to introduce you as the new high lady of Autumn. I want you come along.” He sighs, “it means you will have to see all of them again.”

The realization hits me like a ton of bricks. I breath for a moment, thinking about it, it’s been nearly five years since I left, the last time I saw any of them was the battle with Hybern, and even then Eris kept me mostly away from them so that I wasn’t distracted. “I’ll go.”

“Are you sure darling?”

“Very. I want them to see me as the high lady of autumn. Not the girl that left all that time ago.”

He smirks his signature smirk, pride filling his eyes. “Very well. Shall we begin planning?”

———

Everyone has finally arrived- or what is usually everyone, confusion sets in as Eris seems to sit in waiting, an empty chair beside him at the head of the table. “Are we waiting for someone Eris?”

“Yes actually. Shell be here any moment, she likes making an entrance.” Something bothers Azriel with the way the high lord smirks. He didn’t know who was going to walk through that door but he had a feeling he wasn’t going to like it.

The door swings open, a woman stepping through, decked in a gorgeous burnt orange dress, green and gold accents around her body, a golden crown, one looking like leaves woven together rests on her head. As her eyes catch Eris’ she smiles. “Sorry I’m late. Hope you haven’t started without me.” She surveys the room before stepping towards the empty seat. Eris stands, going to pull it out with one hand and take hers on his other. The pause for a moment, facing the table together.

“Everyone. I’d like you to meet my fiance and the high lady of the Autumn court. Some of you may already know her.”

As the female turns to kiss Eris, it clicks for Azriel. “Yn.” He can’t help but gasps and that is when it finally hits the inner circle of the night court.

“Hello guys. Long time no see.”

Cassian speaks this time, his brows furrowed and mouth agape, “you- your with him? Your the high the high lady?”

“Yes, in fact our wedding is next month. I am terribly excited. Especially after being named the high lady of Autumn.” She and Eris sit finally, hands staying tied together

An agony Azriel has never felt tears through him as he stares at his mate. She looks back to him as he gasps, clenching his chest wildly.

“Azriel. I’d like to get through my first meeting as high lady. So if you could stop…flailing. That would be preferred.” Yn clears her throat before turning to the others at the table. “I’ve seen some things. I see Koshei. I thought we took care of our issues with him, however I-“

The meeting continues, the night court still trying to process the news. After the meeting is finished, the high lords are given a walk through of the new Autumn court. “Yn. Yn can we speak please.” It was towards the end of the tour, courts had been led to where they’d be staying, only the inner circle trailed behind, minus Morrigan and Cassian who had been dropped off to their respective rooms.

I choose to ignore the shadowsinger, instead stopping at the next door and turn back to Rhysand and Feyre, “You two will be staying here. This castle works much like the house of wind. It will cater to you, we do tend keep things much warmer here for obvious reasons so if you are uncomfortable with the temperature just say the word and it will be brought down by the house.”

“Goodnight Yn.” I nod before turning back to lead the final male to where he’d be staying, Eris never leaving my side. We barely make it three steps down the hall before I feel Rhsyand pry at my mental walls.

‘What do you want Rhysand.’

‘You should talk to him Yn. He’s been devastated since you left and see you with Eris killed him I-‘

I shut it down. I don’t want to hear some sob story from my mate who didn’t even want me till I was gone. “You will be staying here Azriel. What I said to Rhysand and Feyre goes the same for you.”

Me and Eris turn to leave before I’m grabbed by the arm. “Wait. Yn can we please just talk.”

Eris growls. “Get your filthy hands off my fucking finance.”

The shadowsinger seems to get just as upset, opening his mouth to speak before I rip my arm from his grasp and turn, a glare resting on my features.

“Don’t you fucking dare! You have no right- no fucking right to get angry at my fiancée! Do you understand, you didn’t want me and I don’t fucking want you so go wallow in your self pity but stay the hell away from me!” Eris rubs soothing circles on my arm, a glare that could kill sent towards the shadowsinger as he grabs me, winnowing us to our room.

—————

Sooo I hope this lives up to your guys’ expectations!

#acotar x reader #azriel x reader #acotar #azriel #elain archeron #elain x reader #feyre archeron #feyre x reader #nesta archeron #nesta x reader #cassian x reader #cassian #rhysand x reader #rhysand #eris vanserra #eris x reader #replaced #angst #no happy ending

[capseycartwright]

tidbit tuesday because i am finally writing again and i am giving myself an excuse to share that

catholic eddie having a sexuality crisis you’re my one true love actually

Our father, who art in heaven – hallowed be thy name.

Eddie couldn’t help but laugh, a little, as he murmured the prayer. Hallowed be thy name. He knew the prayer talked about God, their holy father, but the prayer had always made him think of his own father, of the way Ramon Diaz was a hallowed man in his own right, how he parented with an iron fist and expected to be obeyed.

Things were getting better now, with his dad. Maybe – maybe that was part of the fear. Eddie had always been afraid of letting people down, but more than anyone, he was afraid of letting his father down – of seeing that look of disappointment set into every crease of his father’s face, an expression he’d been on the receiving end of for more of his childhood than he’d like to admit. Eddie had tried so hard to make sure he was never on the receiving end of that look again, but nothing he had ever done was good enough – not marrying Shannon, not the way he had tried to take responsibility for his young family, not the army, not the man he had been when he’d come home from Afghanistan.

Distance had lessened the number of disappointed looks, but Eddie knew that was because he was simply not seeing them anymore; he was sure his father sometimes frowned at the phone when they’d finally call, silted conversation about Christopher, and life at the firehouse, the best either of them could muster.

It wasn’t perfect, but it was getting better.

Eddie wasn’t sure if he was ready to blow all that progress up. It was selfish, to want to maintain the status quo at the cost of his own happiness, but he couldn’t help it. Eddie, despite what the circumstances of his life would imply, didn’t like conflict – not the fundamental, existential kind of conflict this would result in, the kind of conflict where his character and worth as a father would be called into question.

tagging @mellaithwen @clusterbuck @hattalove @buckactuallys @bibibuck @littlespoonevan @shitouttabuck and anyone else who needs a good excuse to share a tidbit of fic that’s not done but you’re buzzing about

#in which i ramble #no we don’t need to talk about how many catholic eddie fics i have written i won’t be stopping

[elliewithcellie]

Graduation Jitters

summary: You and Steve celebrate passing your final class

wc: 0.6k

warnings/tags: gender neutral reader (but let me know if you notice otherwise), established relationship, mostly fluffy i think, characters are each at least 22 here, no y/n

*********

The digital clock may as well have been analog the way you felt the seconds tick away. Your heart kept in time. Steve took longer than usual to return home from work. Anticipation filled your feet, lifting you from your seated position, now pacing in the living room. There was no use distracting yourself with TV or a book. Your mind raced with the news of your day.

The doorknob shook, pulling your attention from your thoughts. The door opened revealing your boyfriend. His eyes met yours, and a smile lit his face.

“Hi, baby,” he said. He closed the door with his foot, an arm staying behind his back.

“I did it,” you said. “I passed! I’m actually graduating! I’m getting my degree!” You couldn’t contain your excitement, the energy expelling from the balls of your feet as you all but skipped toward him.

Steve put his arm out for a hug. You gladly accepted, nuzzling into his chest. “I’m so proud of you.” He spoke quietly as if his message was only for you to hear. “I knew you could do it. Which is why I got you these.” He pulled his hiding arm around and revealed a bouquet of flowers.

“Steve, you shouldn’t have!” Your voice wobbled, and tears welled up in your eyes. Your sudden burst of emotion surprised both of you. You laughed despite yourself. “Sorry, sorry.”

He set the flowers down and pulled you even closer, lifting your chin to look up at him. “What’s wrong, baby?”

“Nothing, nothing at all. I’m—I’m just so thankful that you’re here with me.”

“Of course, I’m here. You didn’t think I’d just ditch you after all this time, did you?” He chuckled and wiped your tears from your cheek.

“I guess not. It’s just that…so much has changed. Nothing is how it was when I started. It was so hard, Steve.”

“I know. Which is why I know how much this means to you. I know how hard you’ve worked, even if I haven’t been there for all of it. I’m here now, and I’m not going anywhere, ok? So, you better believe that I’ll be right there with your parents cheering you on when they call your name.”

You huffed out a breath you were holding in. “You’re pretty great, you know that?”

“I had a feeling,” he teased. His expression switched from smug to uneasy. “They do know about me, right? It’s one thing to introduce yourself to the parents, but for it to be a surprise—”

“Of course, they do!” you laughed. “You’ll do great. My mom will welcome you with open arms. My dad, well, he’ll do his best. I promise. Just don’t tell them that we live together because they don’t know that yet.” You winced at your own words, waiting for Steve’s response.

Steve’s face contorted to one of horror. “You’re joking, right? You didn’t think that would be necessary information?”

“They can piece it together when they get here.” You shrugged.

“What am I gonna do with you?” Steve asked, fondness painting his voice. He pulled you in for a kiss, feathery and light, but loving, nonetheless. “Oh, gosh, I almost forgot!”

“What is it?”

“Your other gift,” Steve smirked. “I’ll go set up your flowers. Go to my car in the backseat, and you’ll find a little treat.”

Your eyes widened as the smile beneath your nose grew. Without another word, you dashed out to his car. A “Congrats” cake sat in the backseat, and you smiled to yourself. You were so thankful to have such a thoughtful man in your life.

#steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington fluff #steve stranger things #stranger things #steve harrington x gn!reader

[peggingeddiediaz]

Complaining because we're happy about buck finally dating the perfect guy is something… and comparing Tommy to Taylor, please

I really am trying to not be as petty as I can be.

I'll say it again, I actually like Buck and Tommy dating, I like canon bucktommy but the fanon bucktommy fans have made the ship so generic in record time, it's getting insufferable seeing posts about them.

Also, let's not kid ourselves and pretend that the insane fan support for Tommy/Lou that elevates the character to "perfect love interest" in just 2 episodes, is not largely unrelated to him being a hot attractive white man. (I still remember some of those bucktommy fans calling Tommy a Walmart version of Buck when the Tommy/Eddie speculation was a hot topic, and now look at them…) I do admit that both Buck and Tommy look very similar at times🤭

Tommy is not perfect, in fact that 1st date was really uncomfortable to watch and not only because of Buck.

1st: The fact that Tommy knew that Buck wasn't out and that this is literally his 1st date with a man, who had his 1st kiss some days before, which is the reason why Tommy picked a really out of the way restaurant for the date, but still he made a "funny" comment about closet spaces to Eddie, who he's not out to, was a choice. Specially when Tommy knows first hand how hard it is to come out to your friends.

2nd: The fact that not only did he not tell Buck about cutting the date short before leaving the restaurant, but that he called himself an Uber to go home and left him there on the sidewalk?? (Confirmation that Buck drove them there is nice though, passenger princess Tommy is canon 🤭)

3rd: For someone who knows Buck might not be ready to date anyone right now, saying yes to a 2nd date, after the disaster that 1st one turned out to be, and as a guest to his sister's wedding is a little insane.

I can imagine the vitriol and innumerable call out posts had Tommy been a female love interest. Aside from those points, is also deliciously ironic how fanon buddie is the way it is because fans were "tired" of the: bigger guy means he's a top and the smaller one is the bottom dynamic, but suddenly everyone is salivating at it now with bucktommy. Which again, it wouldn't be such a problem if it didn't devolve into stereotypes, just like in fanon buddie.

The one thing both ships have in common is that Buck is never allowed to be a character but just the "your name" tag, stereotypical bottom, infantilized and woobified to the point he's barely recognizable.

I like canon bucktommy and canon buddie (or their potential canon given Buck and Eddie's personalities, and how they are when dating other people), their fanon versions though, where they are stereotypes firsts and characters second? not so much.

In conclusion, I like Tommy and his potential, but he needs a lot of development to be considered a character at all (getting told he's cool is not character building) and awkward dates don't count either (specially when the same benefit is never given to the female love interests).

#maria answers #maria rants #911 abc #anon ask #bucktommy #buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #tommy kinard #fandom problems #flanderization of characters is a plague in fan spaces #there are so many headcanons for tommy that he might as well be an OC at this point #i really did try to be concise in my rant #sorry guys

[immortalsins]

HANNIBAL (2013-2015) — SEASON ONE

Killing must feel good to God, too. He does it all the time, and are we not created in God's image? Depends on who you ask. God's terrific. He dropped a church roof on thirty-four of his worshipers last Wednesday night in Texas, while they sang a hymn. Did God feel good about that? He felt powerful.

{inspiration}

#hannibal #hannibaledit #l.gifs #flashing gif #will graham #no way am i tagging all the characters actually #magnum opus. if we're going by effort alone #some of the choices here are as ugly as hannibal's interior design but we move #:/ started off trying to make it pretty and it's dissolved into chaos #pls enjoy my visual clutter i spent hours&hours on it #jumping between serious creepy gifs & then making things objectively so silly #homage to s1 of my favourite silly show <3 #small explanation: the typewriter text is what appears to be the situation (to the fbi). the gifs obviously show the truth that we know #so if ur thinking e.g. tobias budge did not kill franklyn. yes but thats what is believed by everyone but hannibal #idk if thats necessary to say #sometimes theres a dichotomy between the text and gif. sometimes not #so idk if it was clear #anyway #there we have it #good lord #im done #there are so many things i want to say abt insignificant details sjdbjhsb e.g. hannibal not being in the final few gifs is deliberate. #hes menacing in a ghostly background kind of way #the same way he is in s1 #okokok im going to post thsi now my procrustination is getting ridiculous #pls if you see a mistake i would love to have it pointed out #so i can fix it early on #i am sure there is one #ANYWAY posting & logging off . this was hours and hours worth of work holy shit

[eskildit]

i think a lot about hot sauce and jeannemary. two young girls so ready to kill and to die. a comparison made all the worse when you recall that hot sauce lost all her family to the cohort, that she can specifically recall fourth style necromancy (using corpses as bombs). a fourteen and thirteen year old that could easily have been on opposite sides of the same front line. 

#the locked tomb #the loss of childhood! senseless violence! #opposite ends of the propaganda machine #eskildit posts tlt #all of nona the ninth #how am i supposed to tag hot sauce #jeannemary chatur #ok to rb #edit: okay im actually gonna use these tags to ramble a lil #in many ways i feel alecto the ninth is gonna be the hardest book to actually pull off #first for the obvious reason that its an ending and endings are always hard #but second because nona the ninth was by far the most political book of the series #books 1 and 2 following harrow and gideon mean we're following characters on the outskirts of the empire #gideon is individually oppressed by the ninth and even harrow is considered a black sheep outsider of the nine houses #but they are still WITHIN the houses gideon has dreams of the cohort harrow has dreams of of revitalizing her house #nona was our actual introduction to the real consequences of the empire that characters like judith like jeannemary like corona herself #have their livelihoods and status entirely built on the imperial violence we see first hand on new rho #anyway i say all of this to say it means coming back to these characters might be kinda tricky! #the cost of the empire is no longer abstract its extremely palpable! #how does one return to our core cast we've know for multiple books now that we understand that #idk. interested to see where we go!

[flustersnaggle]

THE WORLD, FULL OF INFINITE POSSIBILITIES

aurelia aquareine (she/her), sage of alchemy — cheerful // creative // perfectionist

general: face skinblend // facekit 1 // facekit 2 // face highlights (highlight N1) // face undertones // hairline // brows // eye preset // lashes // eye base // eye sparkle // eyeshadow (eyeshadows N9 glitter only) // eyeliner // blush—... hey, where did it go? // mouth corners // teeth // body preset // skinblend (skin N13 overlay) // skin tints // nails // wrist tattoo everyday: hair (my wedding stories) // hat (helia hat V3) // earrings // choker // dress // boots formal: hair (my wedding stories) // earrings // necklace // lipstick // dress (high school years) // arm bracelet (realm of magic) // shoes (base game) athletic: hair (fashima fro) & headwrap overlay // earrings (base game) // top (throwback fit) // shorts (daisy shorts V1) // socks (artemis socks) // shoes (incheon arrivals) sleep: bonnet (V2) // robes (vintage glamour) // shoes (spa day) party: hair (lisa low fro) // earrings (ashley earrings) // necklace (poolside splash) // lipstick // dress (naomi dress) // bracelets // shoes swimwear: hair (pam puff V1) // top (island living) // bottom (base game) // bracelet (base game) // feet hot weather: hair (penny puff V3) // earrings (base game) // top (eco lifestyle) // shorts (realm of magic) // bracelet (base game) // shoes (incheon arrivals) cold weather: hair (lisa low fro) // hat (seasons) // earrings // coat // gloves (get to work) // shoes (get together) extras: poses 1 & potion // poses 2 // poses 3 // realm of magic icons rip

thank you! — @atomiclight, @pyxiidis, @okruee, @ddarkstonee, @serawis, @sayasims, @meghewlett, @obscurus-sims, @miikocc, @pralinesims, @xiamdeathx, @goppolsme, @squea, @magic-bot, @crilender, @ms-marysims, @clumsyalienn, @raccoonium, @philosimy, @mysteriousdane, @crypticsim, @sheabuttyr, @aharris00britney, @ayoshi, @mapleseed, @qwertysims, @arethabee, @sentate, @lady-moriel, @makesims, @dearie-sim, @hula-zombie

#terribly sorry about her hair blending into the background in the lookbook pics by the way. i've never taken screenshots in live mode before #anyway. got bored so i tried my hand at an alchemy sage #i actually tried keeping her at roughly the same level of extravagance as the other three sages' official designs so she could #somewhat reasonably stand next to them. otherwise i would've made her far more elaborate what with being a sage and all #that being said i am very proud of how she turned out in the end though #the sims 4 #ts4 #ts4 simblr #simblr #ts4 spellcaster #spellcaster #ts4 sage #realm of magic sage #ts4 lookbook #lookbook #sim: aurelia aquareine #snag's sim tag #...as a bonus treat for reading the tags this far i'll let you in on a secret #aurelia's first name means 'the golden one' referencing gold's alchemical significance and perfection #whereas her last name aquareine is the name of a character from the wizard of oz novels (like how L. faba's name is a reference to elphaba) #AND is a reference to the name of the aqua regia chemical solution as well

[sciderman]

I swear I have read your big post regarding Peter Parker's neurodivergence and why it is best to avoid labelling him, but he definitely has a weird brain

Can't find it and feel kinda sad about it cuz I deeply related to it

i know exactly which post you're talking about and i can't find it either! i've raked through my archive, and it's just - nowhere to be seen. i think tumblr eated it (it happens.)

really, tumblr's search functionality is so so useless, i don't know what to tell you. there are plenty of keywords i can search to find it that post, but the search functionality actually just does not work!

undiagnosed audhd-addled peter parker, my darling, my light, my life, my everything.

i think peter parker's such an interesting creature to write, because a lot of people will point to a certain behaviour about him and say "this is an autistic thing, right?" but a lot of those behaviours are actually, in my head, tied to certain traumas in peter's life too.

people say "oh, the food thing, peter's a picky eater because he's autistic" and yes, absolutely. but also it's tied to his trauma with his parents.

peter gets overstimulated, and yes, it's an autism thing, but also he was bitten by a radioactive spider and his senses are dialled to 11.

it's a similar case i've found for myself, too – where a lot of friends i have kind of diagnose me because i have autistic traits, but actually - i'm hesitant to claim the label or pursue diagnosis because, actually, i know where these certain behaviours come from, and they come from certain traumas. there are events i can pinpoint in my life and say "yep. that's where this behaviour comes from."

so - i think there's a lot of overlap between trauma and autistic traits. the brain is very complex! i think the reason for that overlap is maybe as simple as the fact that people with autism and people with trauma are both doing the same thing - developing behaviours to protect themselves or soothe themselves. so - i think it's nice to be able to see a character like peter parker, who may or may not be autistic, but recognise behaviours in him and see yourself in him.

people who go undiagnosed for whatever reason - people who are really good at masking - so good, in fact, that they have no idea they might be on the spectrum - everyone and anyone at all can look at peter parker and recognise themselves. because i think we discredit the thought that every single brain does the same thing! develops certain behaviours in order to survive. every brain has that same software - we've just all been faced with different hardships that we need to overcome, and that's were all the differences come in.

autism is a spectrum, i guess - everyone falls into it to some degree. and i think events in your life probably push you along on it. but i don't know, i didn't study brain science. probably what i'm saying is very stupid and uninformed. of course there's brain chemistry involved. but i know people in my life living with autism and certain events in their life have exacerbated certain behaviours or made coping with it a lot more difficult. so maybe trauma is a catalyst.

#a lot of my traits have been exacerbated lately and i remember it was much easier for me before #and some of my friends have said “oh it's because you've been masking too long and now you're facing autistic burnout.” #and that made sense to me i think. #but then i found out about the stress thing. me overproducing stress hormone. and that's a very physical thing. #and that explains why i've been overstimulated more than usual lately. and why everything feels like too much. #and i wonder how many of these traits of mine are going to subside once i have lamar removed #and it makes me wonder a lot of things. and it's so weird how much your brain is tied to your biology. #i wonder how much i'll change. i wonder how i'll feel. i wonder if i'll still feel like me. i wonder how much me is me right now. #and how much of me is being altered by weird freaky hormones. who am i?? who will i be?? #i'm almost looking at this as like. a superhero origin story of some sort. like this is my spider-bite moment. maybe. #will i be different? will i cope with things differently?? now that my body isn't fighting something anymore?? #maybe i'll be normal. i don't know. i don't know. #i don't know what it'll mean for me. #but all of these things mean i relate to peter parker in a certain kind of way #i don't think you have to be diagnosed with autism to recognise and empathise with those traits i think #i think everyone can see themselves in peter. and i think that's the benefit of having characters that aren't diagnosed. #because there's so much overlap in the human experience. and certain feelings aren't exclusive to just one group of people. #peter has such a rich identity actually. it's an autistic thing. it's a queer thing. it's a jewish thing. it's a trauma thing. #there are so many overlapping parts of peter's identity that inform who he is and how he behaves and it's never just one thing. #it's a product of all of his things. #just like me! just like everyone. #so me? i guess i can be a million things. you can explain what i am in a million different ways. #a hundred different psychologists can all come up with different ways to explain why i be the way i be. #i don't think it's something that can be simplified. #sorry wow. i'm really going off here in the tags. #i hope people don't think i'm stupid. i don't know brain science. i'm just philosophising as usual. #sci speaks

[writeouswriter]

Reading a fic that's so well written I wish I could close my eyes and just let the descriptions and atmosphere wash over me, but the dilemma with closing my eyes is, well, I then would not be able to continue reading this fic, now would I.

#fanfiction #fanfic #reading #i don't read longform fic very often but this one is so good wow i'm in awe and clicking next chapter next chapter #the movie it's for I'm not even a particular major fan of itself but I am a fan of the character and the ideas and oh my god #they perfect it to a tee in every way even better than the movie could and yet keep their characterization spot on in line with the og #it's amazing the way they balance the humour and banter with the suspense/tension and drama/horror #and their descriptions are gorgeous/pick out just the right details #their follow-up is more canonical to me as a sequel than the actual official sequel which is wrong in so many ways #and I am in love with their writing style so much my god #i'll say the fic if asked probably will honestly make a rec post for it when I'm done just because wow but here i'm just vague posting #i mean it's 10 yrs old and I've been reading fic for 8-9 yrs and it is truly one of the best I've read in all of that #from all my tags I mean you can labour a guess for the fandom or fic and if you were to guess it wow good job I'd be impressed #but anyway !!! love finding masterpieces I hope this person decided to become an author in those 10 yrs almost *sobs* #I'm gonna say the fic anyway whatever it's From Out the Ocean Risen by Bluestar god it's good (for p/acific r/im)

[mattodore]

found out while putting together matthias's oc page that his name has the exact same etymology and meaning as theo's name...

i’m sure this is information matthias is very normal about…

#theo is in fact a gift from god so jot that down ! #river dipping #i've been throwing myself into oc stuff bc i'm not doing hot mentally which is... tbh when i do my best writing 😭 #none of this is new tho i wrote the bios and 'at a glance' intros months and months ago when i first made an oc page #which is why i do plan on rewriting them but for now i'm leaving them like this... so i guess the echthroi page is done? #obviously echthroi has more characters than this but i haven't taken new screenshots of everyone yet... #i put the gray cas bg back in my game a few days ago only to completely forget i wanted to take new headshots for the oc page 😭 #like these are just placeholders... i want the backgrounds to match the oc page. oh... or maybe i could just do transparent pics? #i think i remember vyx made a post abt how to do that... will look into that when i open the game again. rn i'm at my keyboard 🧑‍💻 #like i am writing new things! started a google doc for theo yesterday and have been writing on it here and there since then #i've already cried in there... lmaooo. i like oc pages for sure but i think a huge google doc is what i really need to keep track of things #i drop so much lore in tags on here and it's like! river write that down somewhere else or you'll lose it 😭 #like i fr have never actually written down any of the info i've shared on here. i've just had all this oc knowledge stored in my brain. #so i went through and copied over a tonnn of tags and posts i've made into google docs but i just know i'm missing things i've probably #said in the tags of their core tagged posts... 🧍 if my blog didn't have so many posts i'd have an easier time going through it but 🤷 #and on top of that i've been making a bunch of posts about theo and matthias on my main acc. which is like 🧍 well great now there's more #i'm gonna lose track of...... i fr have gottt to get into the habit of actually putting things down in theo's google doc!!! #i'm just trying to figure out the best way to format it all but i've downloaded a few templates that i've been messing with. #...anyway. if it isn't obvious i'm trying to get back to posting on here. i'm opening my inbox now with the intent to just. #sit here in my inbox until i can get myself to reply. lads... avpd is actually so torturous i'm not kidding. #i feel like i'm dying trying to get myself to interact with people sometimes even despite how badly i want!!!! to interact!!! #theo and me and our avoidant trauma responses holding hands and skipping around together

[empty-blog-for-lurking]

So i finally listened to The Magnus Protocol and uhh holy shit, yall mind if i

[The contents of this post has been deleted]

#the magnus protocol #tmagp #tmagp spoilers #In the tags #My favourite case has to be the 2nd one Daria girl you are so fucked up!!!! You are so fucked up girl get help!!!! #And i am loving the absolute toxic work environment it is hilarious all the characters are great!! #Alice Gwen and Lena have three way situation of snide backhanded remarks and office coworker hate going on #Colin hates everyone but especially the puter and is this close to murder #Sam is just trying to do whatever the fuck he is doing. He is new here. He is over qualified #Teddy my man saw his place workplace comedy swerving towards horror genre and immediately ditched ship good for him!!! #(Unless Lena brutal pipe murdered him in which case girl i am so sorry) #And just character in general. Like Alice is trying to vibe her way through life #while also saying some death flaggy 'oh this is def foreshadowing' shit every episode #Gwen has the same surname as the shows previous antag #but also just after Lena's job and just wants to be taken seriously and thinks everyone is against her #she also may or not have discovered that her boss is murderer but oh well #Sam is like this sweet nice guy who is also so fucking nosy and the only one actually curious about fucked up shit cases magnus institue #And everyone is telling him to stop Girl! Turn away girl!! You are gonna get fucked up girl!! Look away!! #Colin is just so fucking angry and feral but also IT is just like that. He is crawling on the floors. He is growling at people #Lena is so fucking tired with all these bitches in her office Head Bitch incharge of all these Bitches #And i am 80% sure she murdered that guy Klaus #Anyway love all of this. Cant wait to hear them get killed in brutal tragic ways

[eliounora]

red white and royal blue was so cheesy and predictable I enjoyed it thoroughly. making banal queer romantic comedies is hard but necessary work

#sooner or later we'll start getting them with lesbians too *shakes fist in determination* imagine #nor's rambles #ALTHOUGH it would be refreshing to get a film that does not hit all these romantic comedy beats #or that would be a romantic comedy but actually good. like palm springs but gay. the big sick but gay #WHEN HARRY MET SALLY BUT GAY although that really hits the beats ahgvadhbfds #also personally i like queer stories that don't give much attention to labels and such. i think those are really important too #it's one of the reasons i'm not the biggest fan of hearstop*per (censoring so it doesn't go into the tag to ruin people's fun) #because i feel like it's just taking all the letters from the LGBTQIA and assigning each character with a letter #which is not wrong in any way and once again i am older than the intended audience it's not For Me #but i am often left craving something sort of... less defining. more free. more just being what you are and doing what you do #kind of like.. something done for the sake of the story and the art instead of just representation for the sake of representation??? #that is important too!! but kinda craving stuff for us who don't really like labels as well???

[cocolacola]

do not even talk to me about any "my fav is doomed by the narrative" shit unless u witnessed the Sylvanas Incident of 2018-2022 because that was my final straw

#infodump in tags #not even the narrative. she was doomed by the narraTORS #Edge of Night is one of the most powerful and beautiful works ever added to the WoW canon. #and then it got retconned for alien lava worms. all because we needed a way to get to the shadowlands. #a truly morally gray character turned into this weird poster figure for some antagonistic force the writers werent sure how to handle yet #i am actively exploring the reality where EoN is still canon and she never became warchief #i miss her bickering with garrosh it was such interesting tension for the horde and also was a very interesting way to characterize her #like how she stuck up for kul tirans and didnt approve of the theramore attack but still did everything she did to gilneas #THAT was some REAL ethically questionable shit that i will actually find interesting. #not whatever the fuck bfa/sl was. #she makes me so sad. #warcraft #sylvanas windrunner

[starstrike]

Some memes I've made for my city of mist campaign, Here's What You Mist, which you can listen to here:

City of mist is a ttrpg where you play as everyday people posessed with the power of a story- a Mythos. We explore some rough themes, so mind the trigger warnings! You'll find action, community building, characters recovering from abuse, a coming of age story, metareferential esoterica, claymation, a nonbinary slow burn romance, political machinations, and much more inside.

In order:

Teesh, she/her: Parkour streamer, Mythos of Fujin

Kaz, they/them: Mafia courier and street racer, Mythos of the headless horseman

Agave, they/them: Mafia family member and rave dj, Mythos of Dionysus

All character art here was commissioned from an artist of the book, Ario Murti.

#ttrpg podcast #ttrpg character #city of mist #here's what you mist #please check it out 🥺 #podcast #dnd podcast #<- it isn't but i am stealing that tag for clout <3 #ttrpg art #its funny that kaz is in all three of these cropped images #it just worked out that way #i play kaz btw #we also have ace and disability rep if thats a plus for you. #also our first recording wasnt actually going to a podcast so us talking about it being a podcast in e1 is a bit. #Also we truly do improve as time goes on give us a chance <3 #Spotify #heres what you mist #hwym #ren rambles

[bonesandthebees]

man I'm glad I decided to read a game of thrones as a way to take notes for how to write rose... I just read about a huge battle with thousands of soldiers and it was so well done... now am I going to write a battle? no fucking way I don't hate myself that much but I know HOW to execute it in a very easy to visualize way and that's what's important

#also i'm just enjoying the book guys i literally tried watching one ep of the show and i was so furious at the changes they made #like are there issues with the way the book treats female characters yes but does it treat them INFINITELY BETTER THAN THE SHOW also yes #especially catelyn stark she's probably my favorite character so far #those showrunners just really hated women it's so fucking obvious #anyway my goal is to finish this book in the next few days #i have been slowly chipping away at it since february of this year #I want to specify i have actually picked up and read this book less than 10 times total this year #so like yes it's slow going but i am not a slow reader i just dont actually pick up the damn book a lot #i wanna get back into reading books more i am trying over here #anyway sorry for all the rambling in the tags i am so tired #ramblings