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#so i just post it when im done and then it just loops like that
dizzybizz · 2 months
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an edyn design but i will most definitely futz with the outfit when i have brainjuice for it gill with pretzel babywrap inspired by my brother who listened to maybe half of ep1 and got it in his head that pretzel was tied to his stomach, not on his hip and i screamed when he told me no thoughts head empty sketch of gill pose
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arvoze · 6 months
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the power i will receive in a matter of days will be astounding. watch out
#i am making this post to ramble. idk if it will actually change anything but i am trying 2 be hopeful .#ive been very. Rough all month thus far both physically and mentally and occasionally both at the same time#i am just hoping tht wat i am getting soon will help me do things bc ive rly had no energy to do anything at alllllll#and i rly dont want to like. Explode i would like to get things done#i have things i owe to people!!! i just dont have the spoons to do it Ever and it piles iup and up in my head#it fucking blows dude i have been stuck in a horrendous loop for like almost 6 months#i just want 2 be normal u know . i am hoping something will change soon#if it does not change in the nesxt few days when my shit arrives i think im like. Done For in general#like if im unable to get anything done in the next few days then i am going to very seriously have to reconsider#literally everything i do online i think. its a bit fucked up#ik it sounds like an exaggeration bu there is noooo way in hell i am Surviving like tihs !!!!!!! slash srs#i wish twitter circles did not die so i cold blow up in there bu back to ye olde norm of tumblr tags will have to do#also it feels less invasive so like. win for me ig. i do miss rambling nonstop in tags#i miss tumblr!! i miss a lot of old stuff. reminiscing for reasons both good and bad. the tumblr stuff is the good side tho#anyways i have been slowly chipping away at writing thigns this month and ik its like. not a lot at all.#but its a lot to *me* and when youre someone whos only capable of doing so mch its like. a big deal#(im writing pmdnd stuff finally getting back into gear nd stuff i have been trying to slowly draw the npcs#that ive made whilst trying to recover in other areas bu rghghrghgrgr i dont ewant to draw#i havent wanted to draw in a long long time blows up)#i shuld. stop typing actually i am rambling too much i jsujt have nowhere to mindlessly ramble anymore technicaly#i dont want to bug my friends w me being unwell all the time DFJKGHDFKGFG#mayne i will try to ccontinue with the npcs. we will see based on if i post again in the next 30 minutes
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oflgtfol · 3 months
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anyway i lowkey wanna make a big masterpost and/or essay or whatever like as a handbook to night sky observing. not just in a like, here's how to identify constellations, but in the like. here's how to ground yourself here on earth and see the actual orbital configurations of our heliocentric solar system by simply observing planetary motions in the sky. and observe the fact that the earth is round by watching the motions of the seasonal constellations and draw some celestial sphere diagrams. etc
i'm like especially interested in archaeoastronomy lately because of these exercises in trying to generate an actual bodily intuition around astronomy beyond the math and programming that i learned in school, because it's like, this is the version of astronomy that existed for millennia upon millennia until technology advanced enough to make more complicated observations and conclusions. we literally only had our own eyes, bodies, and minds to puzzle it over for most of human history. and trying to recreate this in myself by teaching it to myself through brief stargazing sessions and many many sessions in stellarium in my free time is like, idk. really eye opening. it's one thing to be taught in school that yeah the earth is round and the sun is at the center of the solar system and there's other planets, and it's another thing to then do complicated math under those assumptions, and it's a different thing entirely when you actually then go outside and see with your own human eyes that those facts are true of the physical world you exist in. these aren't just abstract concepts but things that occupy the physical space that you live in
#and its also so fucking frustrating trying to puzzle out apparent retrograde motion and see it for myself in stellarium#and trying to then check my observations by comparing it to the officially calculated retrograde dates i find online#... and the only fucking websites hosting this information are all astrology websites#bitch i do not care about what mars in retrograde means i just want to See It In The Sky !!!#brot posts#astro posting#like idk im so used to seeing these diagrams of retrograde motion that made the backwards motion seem like so obvious#these big loops and shit#but then im sitting here staring at jupiter like. i dont see anything. wtf do you mean its in retrograde in october 2024 it's still fucking#moving westward even when not in retrograde what the hell#but then i had to zoom in and look at it relative to the background stars and its like. oh !!!#its in taurus and drifting eastward ever so slowly but then october happens and it starts drifting west towards the hyades#and its like such a small subtle movement i just kept missing it when i was zoomed all the way out#and now im like damn i cannot see it in real life outside stellarium because i cannot make most of taurus out with my eyes irl#i can only really see the hyades and the vague shape of taurus but i cant resolve the individual stars bc of light pollution#so its like. there's no real way for me to distinguish jupiter moving east/west night by night inside taurus then if i . cant see taurus#and so then after im done saying all this to myself im like. damn im in deep. lulz. no way i can explain this to another person irl
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foxstens · 8 months
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metropolis is weird
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tgcg · 2 months
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this is my element (+ album)
asking me to pick my fave album is like asking an orphan matron to pick her favorite baby boy
thats some weird and cruel circumstances to put upon me i feel like it changes every damn week like a rota
i mean what if my beats misbehave and i gotta put 'em in time out i cant play permanent on that theyre too cute
but yknow what i can show you one thing thats been on my mind lately
===
so when i was a kid we had this skateboard vid by "element skateboards" on DVD
they were this skateboard kit slash apparel company that was all about progressivism and shit and they did these much lauded comp tapes of dudes riding around on their boards and doing the dopest of macho tricks on the shit
flipping it turnways
putting the rock in the house like a big man
we had some of their merch actually
===
so anyways the one we had back then was This Is My Element
released 2007
mostly clips from cali i think and i mean the camerawork is fucking insane on some of those shots
this is gonna sound lame as fuck but i prob spent so many cumulative hours just peelin through the footage and ogling the shit outta it
that framing was tight
===
so you may be asking yourself or me
dave you genuine dicksucker i asked about your fav album not your favorite sordid ass display of smooth dudes hardcore riding and grinding them boards in public dude you have a problem
ok well that wasnt a question first of all so jot that down
but anyways to THAT i say
listen to the music
the whole thing has an original soundtrack of ambient beats
got some abstract hip hop jams, got some more indie stuff, lots of acoustic sampling
HELLA underground
and basically every track minus one is done by sampler beast david p. madson AKA "odd nosdam"
dude is my hero seriously
he is the master of the beat machine i shit you not hes always been kinda my idol on this stuff
aside from bro obviously
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obviously.
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anyways he had an E-mu SP-1200 which is a really oldschool sampler invented by dave rossum in the late 80s
revolutionary to the hip hop scene
nosdam had this mega distinct sound to his music that i always wanted to replicate on my own beats
still do
i dont know for sure if he used it on T.I.M.E. but he uses some of the same samples from "vol. 9" which was exclusively SP-1200 so im gonna get a lil j’accuzi on that
it couldve been a boss dr sampler SP-202 though idk
he had one of those
===
so aside from beating the shit out of the pause/resume button to flip my whole cranium at the cinematography or whatever i would also kinda play it on loop to listen to the soundtrack and space out at 2am
the lonely broner seemed to free his mind at night
ok shit broner is good but i didnt mean it like that
that was goofy lets just keep movin
it was the only way i had to listen to it back then but i mean the video is 50 mins long so its basically just an odd nosdam album with accompanying ambient skater sounds and random expletives and whatever
random car sequence
yknow what i dont think people respect enough?
the dude who catches all the "mad stunts yo" on camera
i swear to god at least half the time hes ALSO on a board and that shit is bananas to me
bros gotta be on some whole other level of zen to skate good AND catch all them glamor shots of his fellow skater
thats like an express ticket to the ER imo
the ambulance is already on the scene watching you like an eager crow watches a half dead dog
===
ok gonna go ahead and lay it out flat
not great on a board myself
kinda dogshit at it actually
so maybe im not exactly an arbitrator of skateboard heinousness
but i always kinda liked watching THEM do it i mean who doesnt?
whats an even crazier layer to stack on the "dave" cake is
and dirk told me this because unfortunately it kinda happened post-2009
he would do all these collabs with one of my childhood favorite underground rappers david cohn aka serengeti
surrounded by daves left and right dude even before all the time travel horseshit
thats like
serendipitous as fuck i think!
===
if sburb was just a revolving door of artists called dave that i could bump fists with
instead of other mes in various states of aliveness tending toward extremely dead
i wouldve probably given it something higher than 2 stars on my TGN review
===
so yeah you ask me my favorite album its T.I.M.E. by odd nosdam i guess
bump that shit on a walk your mind will go places unknown to man
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tofuxtea · 10 months
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𝟑:𝟓𝟗 𝐚.𝐦. | 𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐇 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒
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𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 — hobie brown x fem!reader
𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 — nsfw, smoking (weed ofc), that thing where u blow smoke into someones mouth (RAAAHHH) high sex, bit o’ grinding, hobie lowkey gotta praise kink, lots of making out, unprotected piv sex, reader calls hobie “bee”
𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒 — okay this was meant to be like half of what it is, like this shit wasnt even meant to have dialogue or nothing, but im literally so happy w how this came out. me literally rising from the dead to post a hobie smut and then dying again i am sorry.
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i feel like high sex with hobie would be so fucking intimate like… oh my god. listen.
what starts out as a casual smoke sesh in his flat, both of you sprawled out on his bed talking about any and everything, turns into him yanking you into his lap with a smirk on his lips as he blows the bitter smoke into your mouth. he rests his hand on the back of your thigh, the nearly finished joint loosely in between his fingers as his thumb rubs circles into your skin.
he lets you take one more hit, feeling his breathing slow significantly while he watches you, though he’s not sure if it’s because of the weed or because of the way you let your head fall back to blow the smoke past your lips, perfectly exposing the expanse of your neck and jaw.
you offer hobie the joint again and he takes it, but he smashes it right into his ashtray, his hooded eyes stuck on you as he pulls you down to capture you in a slow, sensual kiss. his lips are soft and warm, contrasting his cool lip ring, and you can both taste the pungent, earthy taste of bud on each other’s tongues but neither of you care. “fuck, you’re so beautiful,” he whispers against your lips before gently tilting your head back, mouth needily latching onto your neck.
your eyes flutter shut, a sigh mingling with a soft moan. his other hand rests protectively on your bare waist, slipped underneath your band tee, traveling up towards your breasts. he sucks deep bruises into the skin of your neck and collarbones, relishing in each drawn out moan you let out whenever he runs his tongue over them when he’s done.
he’s already painfully hard in his pants, and you can feel it through the thin fabric of your tiny shorts. you drop your weight down into his lap, rolling your hips so fucking slowly against him. hobie groans as he squeezes his eyes shut, fingers digging gently into your skin. a wordless plea for more. “just like that, yeah.”
you grasp the sides of his face and press your mouth to his, tongues dancing messily as you comply, grinding against his clothed dick, desperate for friction. hobie grabs your hip and starts guiding you into a rhythm, one that’s steady but quick. he’s muttering curses into your mouth each time you moan and your thighs tense against his.
it’s too much and not enough at the same fucking time. he’s grasping at your shirt, quickly peeling it over your head and tossing it onto his messy floor. his eyes rake down your body, glinting with something dangerous before he’s back on your lips, then your neck, his craving for you insatiable.
“fuck, bee,” you whine as you reach in between your bodies, sloppily circling your clit through your shorts. “need you so fuckin’ bad, please.” mindlessly, you beg him, grasping his shoulders to try to tear him away from your throat. “i need to come, please.”
he hums against your neck, the noise a deep rumble in his throat that buzzes against your skin. his hand goes to your back and swiftly lies you down, his arms caging you against the comforter. “oh, you will, love.” he peppers kisses to your ribs, lowering down to your stomach before his fingers hook into the waistband of your shorts and panties. you lift your hips off of the bed to help him peel them off of you, then you watch him discard his pants and boxers, hobie smirking when he notices the subtle quickening of the rise and fall of your chest.
he loops his arms beneath your knees and pulls you to the edge of the bed, pressing his hands into the comforter at your sides. you meet his eyes one final time, the amorous flame dying only for a second in a moment of confirmation. he leans into you, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips as he pushes into you.
your hand hooks onto the back of his beck as you let out a shuddering cry. “feels good?” he asks, and there’s a taunting bounce to his tone that makes you want to roll your eyes. but all you can do is nod and hook your ankles together behind his back, a meek attempt to pull him closer. he chuckles, shaking his head. “needy little thing, aren’t ya?”
his rhythm starts out painfully slow, making sure you can feel the drag of each thrust against your sensitive walls. he watches intently the way your eyebrows furrow as your head falls back and how your reddened lips part with each moan each time his tip hits that spongy sweet spot inside of you. his lips find your chest, sucking more deep purple marks into your skin.
“faster, please.” you whined, barely coherent from the already overwhelming stimulation. your palm grazed over the side of his face when he pulled back for a second. he hiked your legs over his shoulders and inched your ass off of the bed, just enough to give him a new angle to fuck you in, before answering your pleas.
he picked up the pace only slightly, but the new angle allowed him better access to your sweet spot. he may as well have been fucking you into the bed. you cried out, hand flying up to muffle your mouth. tears pricked at your eyes. your nerves were working on overdrive, body writhing underneath him.
“that’s it, love. you feel so fuckin’ good.” he coaxed into your ear, pressing a gentle kiss right behind your jaw as he slipped his hand between your bodies, lazily circling your clit. you moaned at the praise and stimulation and your cunt reacted, squeezing around his cock. hobie groaned into your neck, pace faltering just a bit. “just like that, sweetheart.”
“bee, ‘m so close,” your arms latched around his neck, his wrapping around your waist as he fucked you slow and deep.
your cunt pulsed around him and your moans became more and more frequent as you came, hobie barely able to hold out for you to ride out your orgasm before releasing inside of you. he came with a soft groan and a whisper of your name on his tongue.
before you could take a moment to fully calm down and regulate your breathing, you pulled him down into another kiss. it was slow and messy, tongues and saliva meddling together, the taste of weed still boldly present in your mouths. hobie smirked against your lips and gently smoothed your hair back.
“whad’ya say we light another one n’ go another round, hm?”
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nereidprinc3ss · 5 months
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behave
in which fem!reader REALLY wants spencer's attention while he's working
18+ (no smut but sex is talked about) warnings: mentions of sex, spencer grabs readers wrist to stop her from doing something but its not violent, reader is referred to as a girl, no use of y/n, um i think that's it WC: 870 a/n: i have damn near 40 pages of spencer WIP so im biting the bullet and posting some of it. also.. if you want a plot... babe this is not the place for you im sorry... ive never even heard of a plot actually. i dont know about rising and falling action... i dont believe in that. it sounds fake
It feels like Spencer has been at his desk for hours. 
And for hours you've been lounging on the couch, reading your book in silence so as to let him work. But you're becoming... antsy. Impatient. Every time you drop your book and stare at him, willing your white-hot gaze to draw his attention; nothing. He just keeps shuffling papers, signing, writing, reading reading reading. 
At ten, you give up.  
You make a show of slamming your book shut, sighing, slowly sitting up, stretching, standing, stretching again--when you turn your head, expecting your little performance to have at least earned a look from him; still, nothing. 
"Spence?" you ask, innocuously, as you round the couch and draw toward him carefully, slowly, on light feet. A display of faux innocence. It’s not that you intend to bother him, per se--you're just so bored. 
He hums in response, eyes still glued to his work as he searches for something among the mess of paper. 
You come to a stop in front of the mahogany desk, tracing the edge of it idly with wandering fingertips. 
"What are you looking at?" you ask, in reference to a photo he seems to now be studying intently.  
"Nothing you need to see," is his muttered response, quickly flipping the photo face down on the desk and picking up a form walled in migraine-inducing tiny black text. You watch the way he scans the paper, brow knitted, and eyes squinted, clearly not paying you very much attention. 
You move languidly around the desk, letting the wood drag against your hip the whole way, before reaching for the overturned photo--just to see what he'll do. 
Spencer catches your wrist, his grip gentle and warm but not without portent. "What did I just say, grabby?" 
Sadly, they're the most words you've gotten out of him since this afternoon. 
You sigh dramatically and drape yourself across his lap, looping your arms around his neck. To your initial satisfaction he shifts slightly to accommodate you--and then continues to look over your shoulder like he hardly notices the pretty girl on top of him. 
"When will you be done?" you purr, tracing his jaw with a finger.
"I'll be done when I'm done." 
God, he can be stubborn. 
"Can you be done any sooner than that?" 
"What do you think I'm going to say to that," comes his flat reply, still not sparing you a glance. You watch enviously as his eyes dart down the paper he's reading over your shoulder.  
"Then I'm staying right here until you're finished." 
"You can stay here if you can behave." 
You scoff, bunching the fabric on the back of his shirt in your fists. "What do you mean, if I can behave?" 
Finally, you hear Spencer set down his pen, and he leans back in his chair to regard you. His gaze finally on you is like an ice bath. You literally have to repress the urge to shiver under his evaluation; the slightly raised eyebrows, the line of his mouth a little harder than usual. His 'you know exactly what I'm talking about so don't play dumb' look. 
For a few tense seconds, you let your eyes dart between his, not wanting to break first. Unfortunately, you think that look of his could freeze saltwater.  
"Fine," you mutter, flushing when you look down at his shirt collar instead. If you're being reasonable, he probably is doing something important. You drag your gaze back up to his and see that his eyes have softened. 
"Thank you," he says, gentler, squeezing your leg before running his hand over it back and forth a few times. "I know I'm not being very fun today. When I'm done we can do whatever you want to do." 
The urge to say, 'whatever I want to do?' is strong, but you manage to bite your tongue as he reaches back over you to continue his work. Instead, you content yourself to lean against him, allowing his solidity and warmth to envelop you for some immeasurable stretch of time.  
Rain starts up, battering the windowpane and accented by deep rolls of thunder. The scratch of Spencer's pen on paper, the rustle of files, and the scent of patchouli and amber begins to lull you into a doze--a comfortable place between awake and asleep. It's the kind of comatose unconsciousness that bends and liquifies time, and you don’t even realize you fell asleep until you’re waking up. 
Spencer murmurs your name, brushing your hair carefully out of your face. "Did you fall asleep, angel?" His voice is soft, just above a whisper.  
"Mhm," you groan, rubbing your eyes. "How long has it been?" 
"A few hours," he sighs. "That file took a lot longer than it should have, I'm sorry." 
You're still bleary as you speak next; 
"The thing was sex." 
"What?" he laughs, rubbing your leg as you adjust yourself in his lap. 
"You said we could do whatever I wanted to do when you were done, and it was sex. But now I'm tired." 
"Let's get you to bed," he begins, "and revisit the sex idea in the morning. Does that work for you?" 
You smile against his shirt, eyes already fluttering closed again. 
"Mhm..." 
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honeytonedhottie · 3 months
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some manifesting exercises⋆.ೃ࿔*:・🎀
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this post serves as a bunch of manifesting exercises that i have tried and do. its simply a collection of some of my favorite manifesting exercises and it can serve as inspo or something that you'd like to try
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manifesting is super fun and effortless and i think that its important to make the manifesting process fun and enjoyable and not overcomplicate it or make it seem harder than it rly is. ENJOY getting everything that u want ✨
robotic affirming - it's exactly as it sounds. its how i manifest a lot of my desires, this is def specified taste though so it won't be for everyone but i rly like it personally cuz i manifest fast with it. all u do is just choose an affirmation (1-2) and affirm it as much as possible ; while doing mundane tasks, in bed, in the shower, repetition is the key to this one. i use this for just about anything.
voice memos - this gets u into that state of mind where you're like "it already happened" so you'd make a voice memo of u talking about ur desire as if you already had it. so if im manifesting a new makeup product my voice memo would be : "today i used _ it was so GOOD. it made my lips so moisturized, i love the way it looks on me and it even smells nice" etc etc. or think of it like ur sending a voice message to a friend being super excited that one of ur manifestations materialized. i use this for sp's a lot.
saturated mind - since i like to write, i'd write vaunts and scripts and affirmations lists and when i had the time/when i wanted to do it, i would sit with a subliminal and put it on loop, and i'd time myself for x amount of time (at least 10 minutes for me) and just VAUNT and READ all of it nonstop. while writing its important to use repetition and speak about my desires in the present tense and use affirmations are customized to ur desire.
eavesdropping - this one is pretty fun i think, its just imagining that someone (friend, family member, classmate whatever) is talking about u regarding ur desire. its called the eavesdrop method bcuz its like ur eavesdropping on ppl talking about you, except their speaking about u positively.
writing a story - write a story about urself in relation to ur desire. for example, lets say u rly like cookies. you'd write a story about urself receiving the cookies, eating the cookies. how you felt when u saw the cookies, how it tasted etc etc. and be GRATEFUL as though it happened already. saying "it is done" always triggers that feeling of fullness for me.
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grandlinedreams · 6 months
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hey babes!!! i just want to say that i love your law fics! and i stumbled across the soulmate law fic and you talked how law is so kaz brekker coded 🥹 glad im not the only one!! i would love to see more law in kaz moments just like the scene when kaz treated inej in the bathroom (im not sure if you've done this trope before but i love the tension between kanej) 🤣
GOD BLESS YOU you know what i'm talking abt they're so similar yet different but OUGH YES i had to find my copy and reread the chapter so i could get a good read again hhhfnd
[Heads up!: some good ol' pining, mention of injuries, pre-dressrosa/post punk hazard]
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The door to the bathroom is open, shiny tile and bright lighting ㅡ and you, making neat strips of clean cloth for bandaging. Law doesn't knock to announce his presence, knows he doesn't have to. Though you don't look up, you're aware of him.
"There are two doctors on this ship," he intones, "you could have had one of us patch you up."
Snip. Another strip of bandage. "Both of you are injured. I hardly think it fair to ask you to do more while you heal."
"I think you're still bleeding." Law nods to the bright red that blossoms through the bandage that you have wound around your upper arm, approaching. "I can help."
You secure yourself further against the basin, watching him. In the reflection, he catches a peek of the tattoo stamped over the topmost knot of your spine ㅡ he looks away.
"I'm sorry."
You don't ask him what he's apologizing for ㅡ there are a thousand things he could be apologizing for, a thousand that he should.
Apologies don't come easy for a man like him.
"Were you the one who shot me?" He doesn't like the way you stare at him, Law realizes. Too analytical, too much like you're pulling him apart meticulously, piece by piece. He wonders ㅡ if you reach in far enough to pull the dark, wild thing of his heart out, would you be afraid of him?
"No. Butㅡ"
"Then you have nothing to apologize for." His teeth grit, jaw aching with the force of it. You make it sound as though the world deals in absolutes, measured evenly and doled out in the same way.
It doesn't, he knows that. If the world were fair, he may still not have his family, but he'd still have Cora.
"You shouldn't have come with me." He still hasn't moved towards you, evaluating you like a cornered animal despite the relaxed set of your shoulders, the loose curl of your hands for balance on the basin.
"I pledged my loyalty to you, not to a ship crew without their captain."
Law wonders if you've ever lied in your life. You meet his gaze, and his eyes narrow. He should demand you leave ㅡ find some way to get ahold of Bepo and the others, make you leave.
(He needs you to stay.)
He finally slots himself in the space between your knees, takes hold of your arm with one hand, the scissors you'd been using with the other.
Despite the blood seeping through, the wind of bandage is neat, efficient ㅡ you've watched him do it so many times.
Snip.
Bare skin, marred only for the clean, punched hole that oozes fresh blood. If it hurts, you don't show it.
He holds his hand out without looking at you, soft cloth against his fingers that he dabs your wound with.
"What's your intention in Dressrosa?"
Blood seeps into the cloth. "This should be stitched."
He doesn't need to look up to know you're staring at him. He can feel your gaze, fights the urge to look at you. "It's fine."
He winds white bandage around it, lost in the soft loop around your arm as he finally answers your question. "To bring down Doflamingo."
Scissors gleam in the lighting overhead. Your eyes, dark moon pupils haloed by color ㅡ dismantling him, piece by piece. "What are you really after?"
Snip.
The scissors clatter into the basin as his hands meet the mirror on either side of your head. This close, he could kiss you. Let his hands wander, touch, selfishly covet the way he so badly wants to. But he doesn't.
(His hands are bloodstained, and yours are not.)
His eyes lock with yours, his fingers curling. "The means to an end."
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geeminz · 15 days
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ᯓ A CHANGE OF HEART // giselle x oc ; smau
00 | as long as it's you
↳ in which: mihye has been secretly dating giselle, her best friend’s older sister, for four months. what happens when their relationship turns toxic, and their secrets become public?
word count: 1.7k
taglist: @thefckghost @emphobics
a.n. i was literally so nervous while posting this cuz im not too confident about the quality of the writing T^T but anyways yeah! here's the prologue guys 🥹
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───────────────────────── flashback
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───────────────────────── now
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it’s now 9 in the evening, and mihye is tired of waiting.
she could no longer count the times giselle’s stood her up. she knows her girlfriend is busy — after all, she’s a junior in college. mihye’s well-aware of the fact that giselle’s coursework is much more demanding compared to hers. mihye tries her best to understand — she tries her best to be sweet, to not get mad or outwardly frustrated, but couldn’t she spare a minute for her girlfriend? can’t she just send her a tiny little message? or maybe even call her if she’s too busy to type?
giselle’s lack of communication gnaws at mihye’s heart like a persistent ache, a relentless throb that refuses to dull, no matter how hard she tries to ignore it.
she’s been forgetting a lot lately… how long until she forgets she has a girlfriend?
mihye wonders if normal relationships are like this — after all, love is all about giving and taking, right? it’s about adjustments, understanding. shortcomings are normal — but at this point, shortcomings from giselle are everyday. 
it wasn’t just the missed dates that mihye was frustrated about — it was the constant cycle of disappointment from all of giselle’s broken and hollow promises. mihye wonders if she’s done something wrong to make giselle act so… detached. 
frustrated, mihye sighs deeply. the side of her head crashlands on one of the throw pillows on the couch — while a plethora of emotions swirls inside her. right now, mihye’s stuck. 
should i text or call her?
mihye doesn’t want her girlfriend to think that she’s being too clingy — giselle has told her that before (even though giselle only said it indirectly, mihye isn’t dumb; she knows what giselle meant when she told her about how ‘they’ve been spending too much time together lately’ and that they’ll be ‘tired of each other at this point’). but what else can mihye do? she hasn’t seen giselle for the past three days.
three days too long, the girl thinks. i miss her so much.
a ding! sound popped from mihye’s phone, and mihye swears she’s never gotten up that fast before. reaching out for her phone, she checks out her girlfriend’s reply.
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frustrated, mihye puts her phone back on the coffee table. it was violently buzzing from the endless stream of phone calls that giselle was spamming her with. 
mihye misses her girlfriend, for sure. but despite her desire to just crawl into her girlfriend’s arms and just forget everything else (just like how giselle forgot their own date), mihye also doesn’t want to listen to her poor excuses about how she didn’t forget — she just had a lot on her mind.
hearing those poorly thought out reasons over and over again was gradually draining mihye. not only did it wear her out, she was also hurt by giselle’s lack of a proper and valid explanation to justify her absence.
mihye glances at her buzzing phone once more. let me let her suffer a little, just this once. i’m too frustrated to listen to her right now.
mihye sighs, tired from the endless train of thoughts that looped inside her brain. she lets her phone ring — knowing very well that giselle will stop calling her soon. she always does. she listens to her ringtone as if it were a broken record playing again and again, and her empty pair of eyes stares at the rose petal-filled and candle-scented room she had set up two hours ago. with blank eyes, mihye observes her living room, her body stunned and her heart empty upon the realization that her best efforts to impress her girlfriend were all going to waste.
i really thought we’d get to spend a little time together today.
due to a force of habit, she subconsciously grabs one of the plushies near her — the one that giselle gifted her for their first monthsary — and mihye clutches it against her chest. her nose brushes against the fur of the plushie, and she smells giselle’s signature perfume on its surface. just like that, giselle invades her thoughts once more.
her phone, which was perched on top of the glass surface of her coffee table, stopped ringing after a minute or so. mihye could only lay like that in silence and in solitude, heart heavy, pained and empty. she must be tired now, mihye thinks. but after that thought, three notifications pinged at her phone.
mihye lazily reaches for her phone to check the notifications.
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mihye’s eyes widen at the text, and before she could even register the texts and respond to giselle, a series of familiar knocks came from the front door.
mihye makes no sound to address the knocks, but she recognizes the voice coming from behind the door.
“hye, i know you’re in there. open the door for me, please?”
mihye doesn’t respond to giselle. she stays mum and stuck at her place.
“mihye, baby. please. let’s talk, love.” giselle pleads once more.
mihye slowly shuts her eyes in defeat. she knew she couldn’t resist giselle — she could never. it’s giselle, after all. and mihye loves her enough to get up from her sofa and walk towards the door to open it for her girlfriend, who was currently pleading for her on the other side of the door.
once the door was opened, mihye sees giselle, clad in all black, leaning on the frame of her doorway.
why does she have to be so goddamn pretty! 
with her big brown eyes, and pouty lips, giselle still looked breathtaking to mihye, even if she did make her cry multiple times before. right now, the older looked like a kicked puppy with the way that she was furrowing her eyebrows. giselle’s glossy eyes stared deeply into mihye’s, and just like that, mihye had no choice but to let giselle in her apartment.
mihye stretches her arm to open the door wider for giselle to enter the premises of her apartment. but instead of immediately going inside, the older girl pulls mihye into a tight embrace.
“baby,” giselle whispers, burying her head into mihye’s neck. “i am so sorry. i’m such an asshole.”
at least you’re self-aware, mihye says in her mind, but she stays quiet as giselle continues to hug her, grasping at her body as if mihye will disappear once giselle loosens her hold on mihye’s waist.
“i just had a lot of things on my mind, hye.”
tell me something you haven’t already told me, gi.
“and i was just so tired today, our prof is literally trying to kill us. i almost fell asleep the moment i got back to my condo.”
i’ve heard that one, too.
“i’m sorry, hye. please forgive me.”
when will you ever stop saying sorry?
“you know i love you, right? i love you, mihye. i’m sorry for fucking up.”
“...”
“hye? please talk to me.” giselle’s warm breath hits the skin of mihye’s neck. due to the closeness of their bodies, mihye could feel the quick thumping of her girlfriend’s heart. she could sense the quickness of giselle’s breathing; as if she just ran a marathon and is running out of breath. mihye could feel how tightly giselle has shut her eyes from the feeling of giselle’s long lashes against the surface of her neck.
she’s sorry — she always is.
and you always forgive her.
that’s how this goes.
mihye sighs, slowly giving in and reciprocating giselle’s hug. just like that, mihye feels the older girl’s heart rate increase tenfold, but after a few seconds, the girl relaxes in her arms.
“gi, let’s go inside first.” mihye suggests, but giselle doesn’t budge at all. 
“gi,” mihye calls out to her girlfriend again, and this time, she lightly taps the girl’s back to call her attention. “gi, let’s get in. someone might see you here.”
“so?” giselle replies, not wanting to interrupt the position they were in.
it is comfy, mihye tries to justify in her head.
“so… someone might see you. some of your blockmates are my neighbors on this floor, you know. they might get the wrong idea if… if they see us like this.”
giselle stays frozen for a few moments, before pulling her body away from her younger girlfriend. mihye looks at her, and deems giselle’s expression as unreadable. she neither looked happy nor sad — instead, she looks like she’s just been hit by a ton of bricks.
did i say something wrong?
the couple walk toward the living room together — giselle observed the place with the same unreadable expression. at this point, mihye couldn’t read her, she could only observe. despite everything, giselle was still careful so as to not step on the petal of roses sprawled around mihye’s floor.
when they got to mihye’s couch, they both stayed silent. mihye — truth be told, did not want to speak. she was far too tired to do so.
we may not be okay, but at least she’s here with me now.
no matter how disappointed i am.
it was giselle who broke the silence between them.
“hye… i’m sorry for putting you in this setup.”
mihye looks at her girlfriend with concern. giselle stares at her lap, unable to look her girlfriend in the eye.
“i’m sorry that i can’t publicly show how much i love you. i’m just not ready yet. i hope you understand that.”
mihye nods before responding. “i do, gi. i knew what i was getting myself into.”
mihye stays silent as giselle continues to rack around her thoughts to pick better words to tell her girlfriend.
“i just need more time, hye. please be patient for me.” giselle says, and mihye’s heart has no other choice but to accept what giselle gives her.
mihye has a lot of questions that she wanted to ask — gi, are we okay?
gi, why are you so confusing?
why are you so cold and sweet at the same time?
what happened to us? 
but as soon as giselle pulled mihye into her warm embrace, all of mihye’s questions and thoughts dissolved into nothing, as giselle’s tom ford perfume swoops into her sense of smells and floods her thoughts with how good her girlfriend smells. 
she's here. with me. and she does care. she's just been busy.
giselle loves me. and i love her.
turns out, no matter how disappointed mihye is in giselle — one word, one apology, one hug from giselle, and mihye’s melting into her touch again. 
as long as it’s her, i’ll endure the pain.
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skyeslittlecorner · 3 months
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can you post some photos on chapter five? ive been struggling to get to it and im impatient if ykwim 😭😭
Don't worry anon, I got you covered! Let's break this chapter for three parts - one for story and for one for both H-scenes. There are a lot of things to look forward to~
Warning: HEAVY SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT. In fact, I'll try to shorten the whole thing and focus on plot-relevant facts, so for those who want to go through chapter 5 on their own, come back when you're done! (Or just skip to h-scene, they are marked.)
Ch5 - STORY
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First, I would like to warn that my opinion about it may be unpopular. As someone who hadn't paid much attention to Hades before, I fell in love with it after this episode. I adore ch5. A lot of people hate these boys to the core for what they did, and I understand and respect their opinion, but I'm with Hades here. I would love to analyze their behavior in more detail, but we don't have time for that today.
Summarizing this chapter is going to be hard because a lot of things happened. Let's go!
We start by going down a slide sponsored by Leviathan and his Lovecraftian friends (TM). But worry not! It seems we have friends even in the realm of death. Say hello to grandpa!
We talk a little, being in a questionable mood. Well, who wouldn't be? But we have the opportunity to know Solomon better, and I'm getting to understand why all devils love him. By the way, it turns out that we are his last descendant.
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Sorry Solomon, you're still a peepaw.
He also advises us not to be afraid of Leviathan and not to be submissive to him, and then in a brilliant way he sends us back to the world of the living. Of course, our beautiful king is delighted.
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We take Grandpa's advice to heart and finally stand up to Levi. He's surprised, but he doesn't try to kill us again (for now). We witness him hanging one of his subjects, who dared to ask about an accident from 311 years ago.
Fun fact. Devils must have much stronger spines. Do you know how people used to die by hanging? The first methods involved cutting off oxygen, but later they involved into breaking the cervical spine and this was considered a standard hanging execution. Leviathan must be gentle (how bad it sounds in this context), he could kill instantly with a loop like that.
Back to the point. We find out that we also have a noose around our neck, and Leviathan makes use of it. We're hanging, but we finally begin to meet Leviathan's nobles one by one.
Glasyal plots (and ends up hanging for it), Foras argues with him, along the way we learn that Leviathan needs us in his plan, and, you know, maybe killing us isn't the smartest thing he can do. Only Barbatos realizes that maybe it's a good idea to stop hanging us like wet laundry. He's the only one so openly nice to us.
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Remember that.
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Another fun fact, our MC is of medium height (~160 cm I guess). Leviathan is 187cm, Foras should be similar. I only noticed this because I myself am 180 cm so they are not so strappingly tall for me.
Foras wants to take us away from Levi and explain everything calmly, but the king does not agree. We learn that the guys know where the seed from the Tree of Knowledge is. We're supposed to go with them, and we have about a 50/50 chance of survival. Also, we have the opportunity to see a very rare phenomenon, a joking Leviathan.
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Sweetie.
Colossally shortening the rest, the cavalry arrives! You didn't have to. I haven't had time to fuck them yet.
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And this cavalry is very much at odds with the nobles of Hades. Most of the time is them arguing. Fortunately, they didn't kill each other…
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...because Barbie decided to kill us.
Barbatos is poisoning us to force Bimet and Valefor to join the plan. While we are unconscious, we have flashes of Leviathan's past, which is too sad to analyze considering that we are about to jump to hot scenes now. Besides, most of us already know what this is about. Experience it for yourself. Really. We also learn that not only angels experimented on children, and a little about Mammon's childhood.
In the end, we learn that in Ch6 we must visit the abandoned laboratory in Tartaros, where the seed from the tree of knowledge should be, because as Solomon's descendants, we may be the only ones who will not be killed by it.
Ch5 - VALEFOR H-SCENE
(I really wanted to post CG from Valefor's scene here, but I don't know if Tumblr will block it.)
TIME FOR DESSERT!
Bimet is the first to realize that we lack devil energy. He wants to take care of it, but Valefor brushes him off, sends him to scout, and overall Bimet is our wingman, what a bro lol
Since we are away from Satan and Gehenna, we cannot summon Minhyeok's room. MC thinks she's outgrown it anyway. So we can count on the next scenes to be more and more creative.
It all starts with us telling Valefor that he reminds us of Mammon. And what a beast it brings out of him.
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And he loves it.
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...aaand then, someone wants to interrupt. Bimet informs us about this and goes to chase them out. Valefor stands with us at the door to see if anyone else is coming. Yes. Naked. With us. In us.
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Fortunately, no one catches us and after the entire session we fall asleep in our knight's arms.
I really would like to do more screenshots, but tumblr is blocked… and there's one more part to come.
Ch5 - LEVIATHAN H-SCENE
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At least you look beautiful and the platform won't block you.
And here's what I love the most. It was sick. I'd love to experience it again.
I would love to make a whole post ONLY about this and just leave the screenshots.
We are in Leviathan's office, and he interrogates us when we feel like we are lacking devil energy. We want to go to Bimet, but do you think our jealous king will allow it? Oh no no no. And of course, his hands land on our chin and then our neck. He doesn't like our hickeys.
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We start asking him valid questions like "why are you jealous of us if you hate us?" So he silences us with a kiss. A deep, suffocating kiss. This is also how Leviathan discovers that we gain their energy through "intercourse with the devil".
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And how can I not fall in love with this idiot.
The conversation that follows gives us some light on his approach to sex and to relationships in general. Which is… sad. It fits him perfectly, but it's sad. And I would also like to analyze this someday, this character is beautiful and how he's written is even more beautiful, especially from writer's point of view. He does not want the admiration of his people or the hatred of angels. The only thing he can believe and consider to be sincere is that someone's dislike. This is something that might actually turn him on.
At first he rules, he asks questions and he hangs us. And he does everything he can to piss us off. He hands us a whip and lowers us down.
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Just disliking him isn't enough, and he works diligently to make us hate him. He insults Minhyeok, us, wishes us dead, and the more he sees our anger, the more he gets excited and talks more. He knows that we are connected to Satan and we will know how to release our anger. On him.
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He finally got what he wanted. We straddle him and, with the help of Satan's strength, begin to strangle him. Neither you nor he are gentle.
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Also, his words (unfortunately, I already have a limit on screenshots). "Do not bite your lips. Bite mine instead." I beg, let me violate him even more.
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Compliment from Leviathan, nice. In the end, we fall asleep cuddled up to him, and he has no intention of giving us up to anyone. As in the case of Sitri, he only opens up to us when we are so unconscious that we do not see his softer side.
꧁:・ ✡ ・:꧂
AND THATS ALL! What a ride it was, I hope I was a good guide. One day I will go into the Hades boys in more depth, but for now, let this be a shortcut for everyone who is still struggling with ch5.
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the-s1lly-corner · 5 months
Note
not sure if you have done something like this before but can you do one where the reader is the type to call everyone pet names? Kind of like Caine does, like "my dear", "darling", stuff like that
TADC cast x reader who calls them pet names!
ooouuugh characters who call people names of endearment habitually my beloved <33 gotta be one of my favorite genres of character; side eyes itward and dick knubbler and caine unrelated to everything im so mad it took me so long to listen to psycho teddy ive literally had it on loop all day and yesterday while i write RAAAAAAAH romantic leaning by the way! though some can be platonic if you squint, i think!!
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CAINE:
honestly i think caine only calls people endearing names platonically and on occasion, but i think you calling him the same style of names it makes his habit more prevalent. i think the first time you call him something like dear, hon, or darling, he kind of does a double take. i mean, hes always the one saying names, but hes never really... been the one on the receiving end... now im not sure if you wanted this to be platonic or romantic, but i think regardless of which this one is; caine loves it and makes it known. you guys experiment to see which names are his favorite eheeh
POMNI:
i think it would take her some time to get used. i think the main reason she didnt really react to caine calling her those names was due to the shock, just to add some explanation for this post in particular on why she didnt seem to mind... i think if there were any names that made her uncomfortable, she would let you know! does eventually embrace it and probably asks if somethings wrong if you call her by her actual name
RAGATHA:
honestly i can easily see ragatha using terms of endearment for those shes close to (like in a general sense, not just familial or romantically) and i can also see her being a huge fan of being called them! i dont think shes been bold enough to ask to be called them, though, so when you just call her dear and love shes over the moon! probably makes a matching name for you! you become to darling to her dear, the bear to her honey, the sweetheart to her sweetpea, and so on and so forth. i just think... that would be really sweet... you know?
JAX:
calls you a really dumb name in response; like shnookums or something within that ballpark. honestly i think it depends on how you say it, when you say it, and how close you guys are when you call him any endearing name. personally i dont think jax likes public affections, since he kind of views it as vulnerability.... at least when hes on the receiving end. bro is weird like that, you know? only lets you call them any of those names behind closed doors.... thinks... surprises you one day by calling you a normal nickname... since usually its the above example or something completely out of no where like. "Mesopotamia" or "20 ton semi truck carrying 720 thunder fucking pounds of freight" or something just as hyper specific
KINGER:
oh i think he would love it a lot! probably calls you a name back in response, perhaps even one that matches; similar to what ragatha does! maybe its because hes old and he gives off nice dad/grandpa vibes, i can see him calling people that he cares about names of endearment (hes only 48)
thinks... though i do think he pauses the first time trying to process what you just called him.. takes him a few seconds before realizing. kind of like the "oh IM pretty boy!" audio but replace pretty boy with any name
ZOOBLE:
i think zooble is the only one who doesnt like endearing names; like i think in a romantic sense they would like it but only really like babe/baby, and not much else... very picky with what they do like, at least for this instance. definitely going to take some experimenting to see what sticks and what doesnt. funny little scenario but imagine sitting with them trying to find something they like and you call them something absolutely abhorrent, perhaps something akin to the "pookie bear with whipped cream and sprinkles on top" meme but WAAAAAY over the top and zooble just. "absolutely not."
not too mean to harsh with rejecting any names, though. but they are blunt about what they do and dont like
GANGLE:
honestly if this isnt romantic and this is platonic, she sees it the same way as when an older lady calls you a sweet name,... you know? does the ^w^ she does in her character intro short thing, me thinks, whenever you call her any name. very shy and sheepish about calling you any names in return, give her some time shes trying to hype herself up so she can return the same energy! only really likes it when you call her those endearing names, i fear that SOMEONE is going to tease her for it... poor girl.... explodes jax with my neurodivergant brain
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shotorozu · 1 year
Text
see you again
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(inspired by that one tiktok trend that’s based off see you again by tyler the creator and kali uchis)
note(s): it kinda makes more sense if you hear the audio itself, so do listen to the 10 minute loop i linked or else this ain’t making any sense. also yes this is a trend on tiktok 😭 at first it didn’t make sense to me (this is kinda out of nowhere and lowkey a weird concept now that im done writing it 💀) but it kinda does at the same time— so now im making a last minute post for mr. popularity 😁🤩
»»————- ♡ ————-««
bakugou katsuki doesn’t understand tiktok trends.
ever since he saw some of the heinously unaware things being posted on the app, he vowed to stay clear from it unless if absolute necessary. (aka if bugged hard enough)
he used to watch reels from time to time (which was a big shocker to you) at least until you pointed out the similarity it had with tiktoks, and since then ditched the concept of watching short videos entirely.
it all seemed like a trick to him— a distraction. not only did he see some blissfully unaware people on that app, but it just felt like people had no concept of digital footprint. (it’d be infuriating if it wasn’t just so sad when he thought about it, actually.)
and— why should he participate in a video that could only get 10 views?
bakugou katsuki doesn’t understand tiktok trends. he might as well never touch the app within a thousand collumns in his appstore.
yet as you sit in front of him, showing him a tiktok trend with an expression that makes him sickly—
he kind of understands.
“y’know, ok ok ok ok is so you, bakugou.”
his face scrunches up when he moves closer to the screen, listening as the audio plays on while two characters representing each side are shown on the screen.
ok ok ok ok
la la la la—
“what the hell does that even mean??” he knows what it means. “how can you tell how a fucking person is an ok ok ok ok person??”
you shrug, “i just know. like… i don’t even have to explain why you’re tyler’s part.”
there’s a beat of silence.
“so what are you?” he questions, curious as to what you have to say. if you even have anything to say. he could tell that other people normally assign archetypes to you— if two repeating letters are archetypes…
damn. he thinks, feeling a sense of unknown sobriety. you got him bad if he can understand some sort of characterization assigned to this little segment of a song.
“la la la la, of course.” you decide, nodding. “well— i could also be ok ok ok ok— who said there couldn’t be two— well, i guess the song…”
you bite down on your lip in thought, and his line of sight immediately follows. “but i think i should be the la la la la to your ok ok ok ok, because—”
his first thought should’ve been what the fuck, that’s so stupid.
but the moment you start explaining, his eyes are locked onto you, catching every syllable and absorbing the obscurity that hangs off your definitions.
he leans forward, nods whenever you make a point. for something so nonsensical yet plain— you talk as if you talk to love, the same way you love to talk about your topics.
“and i rest my case.” he doesn’t realize you’ve reached the end of your spewl until you say it.
he doesn’t wait for you to finish unlike some others and plus. he doesn’t watch the clock or cut in— he listens. and for once, he agrees to something nonsensical yet plain such as this—
well, actually— he let you convince him.
it all slams into him, “fitting.” he grumbles, turning his head away to clear his mind of the images of you talking, so full of life— with him both listening and agreeing at your side.
and that’s when he realized— you were going to be an unstoppable force in his life.
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mossyomens · 2 months
Text
WIP WEDNESDAY
because i remembered i still have time for that!
this is an excerpt from one of my newest WIPs titled "Serpent in the Hills", a naga crowley smut fic that im hoping to finish in the next week or two and post
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“Three years.” Crowley’s voice dripped with misery, fangs just barely avoiding nicking his forearm as he buried his face in his hands. The gorgeous coils of his tail looped closer to him, but Aziraphale came closer as well. “It’s been three bloody years of me being trapped in this bloody cave because I can’t remember how to fix this.”
Something in Aziraphale’s heart broke at the words, at how utterly defeated his friend sounded.. Three years might not normally be all that long for the pair of them, but the angel could see every moment of them etched into the lines in Crowley’s face when he finally looked up again. With a pang of fear, he watched as the demon’s gaze flicked to the sword in his hand, dangling limply at his side.
“Maybe you could help.” Crowley said, trying to sound vague, but Aziraphale knew what he was implying, and was indignant at even the suggestion of it.
“I will not discoporate you, Crowley. There has to be a better solution than that. If we both work together, I know we can help you.” Aziraphale sheathed his sword as he spoke, determination practically oozing off of him. Something in the display soothed Crowley, though he felt deep down that it shouldn’t. No angel should be so reluctant to even consider discorporating a demon. “We just have to think of something.”
Crowley sat, silently for a little while, shifting to lean his back up against the wall of the cave. The very tip of his tail began to flick, slowly creeping its way towards Aziraphale.
“It’s been a long time.” Crowley said suddenly, eyes locking onto the angel before him. His wayward tail had made its way within a few inches of Aziraphale, intent on some foolish notion of contact. “Since Rome.” Aziraphale smiled at the memories, reaching out to stroke the scales that were now so close to him. Crowley repressed a shudder.
“Ah, the bathhouses…yes, those were quite a delight, weren’t they?” He remembered how beautiful Crowley had been then, calm like the sea before a storm as he strode confidently towards Aziraphale, completely nude. The angel had been nervous then, just as exposed as Crowley, wine forgotten as he’d stared. Unbidden, the memory of what they’d done next washed over him. “I seem to recall you enjoying yourself rather well.”
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emolooswrld · 1 year
Text
Bite Me
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pairing: vampire!eddie munson x fem!reader
word count: 3.5k
warnings: 18 + minors dni!! smut, angst, slight suicide ideations, mentions of blood, blood consumption, pain kink if u squint, fingering, oral (f receiving), unprotected p in v sex (wrap it bf u tap it), very slight dacryphilia, squirting, slight spitting kink, dirty talk (and by dirty i mean absolutely filthy), dom!eddie, kind of rough sex, praise kink, use of pet names, fluff at the end, i think that’s it but if i forgot any pls lmk!
summary: you took it hard after your boyfriend died in your arms in the upside down. two months have gone by and you still haven’t spoken to anyone. that is until robin and steve burst through your door with some very unexpected news that changes everything.
note: hey guys!! so ik i haven’t posted in a while. ive been stuck on the fourth part of The Other Woman. dw i am still working on it, but in the meantime here’s this draft that’s been collecting dust in my notes for far too long. this isn’t proof read so if there’s any mistakes lmk. i am so feral for vampire!eddie munson n ik im not the only one, so buckle up n enjoy🥰 ps. this is my first time posting smut so pls lmk if you have any suggestions or critiques.
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One thing about grief is that it never really goes away. At least, that was the case for you. Grief had consumed you. You’ve felt it in the pit of your stomach every single day since that night. That horrible, wretched night. The night your boyfriend died in your arms.
You practically died with him that night. Or at least, that’s what you like to think. You’ve felt as though you’re no longer here. Your body becoming just a shell with nothing inside. You went through the motions of everyday without feeling anything.
In the beginning, you had felt nothing but pain, anger, sadness, despair. You had done nothing but lay in your bed, knees hugged to your chest, and cry. Not like any “normal” cry you’ve ever experienced. These kinds of cries were sobs. Deep, guttural, screaming sobs that crawled up your stomach and ripped through your throat. You would cry like this until you couldn’t breathe. You had prayed that maybe one of these times, you’d just choke to death on your own sobs. At least that way you wouldn’t have to feel this pain anymore, you’d be with him.
But that was two months ago. About a month after the love of your life’s death, you started to feel the numbness. At least when you were crying, you felt something, even if it was just pain. Now, you feel nothing. Nothing but that grief in the pit of your stomach. Your friends had grown terribly worried about you. You hadn’t talked to any of them since that night. You actually hadn’t talked to anyone since that night. You’ve almost forgotten what your voice sounds like.
You knew he wouldn’t want you to live like this. It was actually one of the last things he said to you. “Promise me you’ll find a reason to love again.” He had asked you. Those big brown eyes staring into your own. “I-I can’t.” You had managed to choke out in between sobs. “P-please y/n. Promise me you will. Don’t let this ruin your life.” He had said in response, lifting a shaky hand to brush a strand of your hair out of your face for the last time. His eyes were desperate, pleading. “I promise.” Your voice was hoarse and shaky. “I love you. Forever and always.” Those were the last words Eddie Munson had said before he died.
That moment had been playing through your mind on a loop ever since. There was never a time where you weren’t thinking about it. You had broken that promise. Your life was ruined the second his last breath left his body. Your life was taken from you the second his was taken from him. Nothing could change that, or so you thought.
It had been two months since Eddie’s death. Two excruciatingly long months. You hadn’t seen or spoken to any of your friends. They had all tried multiple times by knocking on your bedroom door. Each time you ignored them or pretended you were asleep. That was until tonight.
Robin and Steve had practically burst through your bedroom door. You turned to face them, they looked a mixture of mostly scared, confused, and angry. But there was a glint of hope behind their eyes. Robin was the first to speak. “Okay we know you’re still hurting and we have respected your boundaries and we’ve given you your space, but we need to show you something. Now.” You looked between her and Steve. “Cmon y/n. You’re going to want to see this.” Steve had said.
“What is it?” You asked. The sound of your voice had startled you. It was hoarse and scratchy from not using it for two months. “Ah! She finally speaks!” Robin exclaimed, clapping her hands together. “See! You’ve already improved and we haven’t even shown you him yet.” Robin clasped her hand over her mouth. Steve shot her a glare. Your heart dropped. You felt the first thing you’ve felt in a month, hope. “H-him?” You stuttered, voice still hoarse. You looked frantically between Steve and Robin, desperate for some sort of explanation.
It was Steve who walked across your bedroom and sat down on your bed next to you. “I don’t really think there’s an easy way to say this so I’m just gonna come out and say it.” You positioned yourself on your bed so you were looking right at Steve. “Eddie’s not dead y/n. He’s alive.” Your jaw had dropped. You stared at Steve in disbelief. “More like undead.” Robin had muttered from your doorway. You spun around towards her direction. “W-what? What do you mean undead?” You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. It didn’t make any sense. “He-no-he can’t be alive. I watched him die. I saw him take his last breath.” The tears you thought were all dried up started to make their way down your cheeks.
Steve started rubbing your back. “We know this sounds fucking crazy, but think of all the shit we’ve been through. It’s not totally unbelievable.” You wiped the tears from your eyes. “Robin, what did you mean when you said he was undead?” You watched as Robin and Steve gave each other looks. They were communicating with their eyes, you’ve seen them do it a thousand times. “Tell me.” You begged. “We promised him we’d let him tell you.” Robin said nervously.
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“How long?” You asked from the back of Steve’s car. “How long…what?” Robin said with a confused look on her face. “How long has he been….back?” You saw the look Robin and Steve shared from the rear view mirror. “How long.” It was more of a demand than a question. “A month.” Steve muttered. “Are you fucking kidding me?” You yelled.
“The love of my life has miraculously come back from the dead and none of you said anything for a month?” You felt more hurt than angry. “Listen y/n, he told us not to tell you.” Steve said. “He practically threatened to kill us if we did.” Robin defended. “Why didn’t he want me to see him?” Your voice broke. You couldn’t believe Eddie hadn’t wanted you to know he was alive. He wouldn’t put you through that pain.
“He’s different y/n. A lot different. He’ll explain everything. We’re not allowed to say anything else.” Steve said sadly. He could tell how hurt you were. Robin turned around from the passenger seat and rubbed your knee soothingly. “He has his reasons. I promise it’ll all make sense when he tells you the full story.” All you could do was hum in acknowledgment. The rest of the car ride was silent.
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Your heart hammered in your chest as you walked down the steps into Steve’s basement where Eddie had been “hiding” for the past month. You had no idea what to expect. The only detail Steve and Robin had given you about Eddie was that he was undead. Naturally, you were half expecting him to look like some kind of zombie. Fear spread through your body like a poison as you stepped down from the last step.
Your eyes slowly scanned the basement. It was dark, really dark. The only light coming from a small window in the corner. Suddenly, you felt two familiar hands wrap around your waist. You gasped as you were spun around.
To your relief, Eddie did not look like some kind of zombie. He looked almost exactly the same as the day he died. The only difference being he was significantly bigger, stronger. Eddie had always been strong, but it wasn’t too obvious. You could now feel the muscles in his arms from just them being wrapped around you. Another difference was his eyes. They were no longer that beautiful shade of chocolate brown. They were completely black. The last difference you could tell he had tried to hide, but you saw them. Those pearly white fangs.
Eddie held you in his arms without saying anything. Your ear was pressed against his chest. It was quiet, too fucking quiet. It took a moment to realize it. He had no heartbeat. It startled you so much, you pushed him away.
“Where-you-why don’t you have a heartbeat Eddie?” You looked up at him with pure panic and fear consuming your eyes. “Wow. Two months without me and that’s the first thing you say?” Eddie asked playfully. You were not in the mood. You wanted, no, needed answers.
“I'm serious Eddie. What the fuck is going on?” Eddie started to speak but you cut him off. “You died in my arms. I watched you die. I went to your funeral. I have spent the past two months thinking you were dead. And now I find out you’ve been alive for a month and everyone knew except me. Do you have any idea how fucking miserable I’ve been? I haven’t spoken a single word to anyone since that night. Why would you make them keep this from me?” Tears were falling freely down your cheeks.
Eddie stepped closer to you, but you backed away. He frowned. “That’s why. You’re scared of me.” You opened your mouth to deny his accusation, but he cut you off. “Don’t lie to me. I can hear your heartbeat. You’re scared of me. I made everyone keep this from you because I couldn’t bear to see you so terrified of me.” Eddie turned around and sat in a chair on the other side of the room. He put his head in his hands.
“I don’t know exactly what I am, but Henderson says I’m basically a vampire. I really did die that night. I don’t know how long I was dead for, but I woke up. Same place where you guys left me, but I was different. I’m stronger now, a lot stronger. My eyes changed colors and I have fangs. I climbed through the portal and came here, to Harringtons. I didn’t know what else to do. I wanted nothing more than to see you, but I didn’t want you to see me like this.” He took a long shaky breath. “I'm a monster.” It came out as the quietest whisper, but you heard it.
Your heart broke for him. You understood now because he was right. You were scared of him, but he was still your Eddie. Just a little different now. You walked over to where he was sitting. You kneeled in front of him, cupping his face in your hands. “You are not a monster Eddie.” You looked straight into his eyes. “You were right, I was scared of you. But now I know the full story. I don’t know exactly what you are either, but I know for sure, you are not a monster. You’re still my Eddie. I love you. Forever and always. No matter what.”
Eddie grabbed under your arms and pulled you onto his lap. You nuzzled into the crook of his neck. “You broke your promise.” Eddie whispered as he rested his head on top of yours. “I know.” You whispered back. “But you’re here now.” Eddie kissed the top of your head. You laid in Eddie’s lap for what felt like hours. You didn’t want to move. You were afraid this was all a dream and you would wake up any second now. Thankfully, it wasn’t.
“If you’re basically a vampire…do you-have you…” You asked suddenly, curiosity getting the better of you. “Drank blood?” Eddie asked. You nodded. “Yep. Unfortunate, I know. But Henderson has been bringing me blood bags from the hospital.” You looked up at Eddie. “Are you hungry right now?” You asked.
Eddie looked down at you. He couldn’t read minds like the vampires in some movies could, but it didn’t take a mind reader to put together what you were about to ask. “Sweetheart, no. I am not going to drink your blood.” “Why not? I want to help you. And if that means you drinking my blood, I am more than happy to help.” You could tell Eddie was fighting something behind those eyes of his. “It’s dangerous. I don’t want to hurt you.” His voice sounded strained, like he was trying to control himself. “You’ve never hurt me before. I trust you. Please Eddie, let me help you.”
Eddie stood up and picked you up with him. He walked over towards the sofa and laid you down gently. He hovered over top of you. “If we do this and you start to feel light headed or it hurts too much you have to stop me, no matter what.” Eddie’s eyes bored into yours. “I will, I promise.” “I’ve never done this before so I don’t know if I’ll be able to control it. If I don’t stop, scream for Steve and Robin.” “Okay.” That was the last thing you said before Eddie was kissing and sucking his way down your neck.
To say you missed the feeling of his lips on your body would be an understatement. You didn’t know how you’ve gone so long without it. You tilted your head back to give Eddie more access. His tongue circled around your pulse point. The groan he let out was almost inhumane. It excited you and terrified you at the same time. You barely had any time to process what was happening before you felt the sharp sting of Eddie's fangs piercing through your skin.
The pain only lasted for a second. It was quickly replaced with pleasure. It wasn’t the usual type of pleasure you were used to. It was euphoric, like pure ecstasy. You couldn’t help but let out a string of moans. Eddie looked up from his place in the crook of your neck. God, he looked fucking ethereal. The crimson red of your blood was dripping down his chin. His pupils were blown out, eyelids heavy. A few strands of his hair were stuck to his forehead, framing his face beautifully.
He licked his lips clean. “You okay baby?” He asked with a smirk. “Felt so good Eddie.” You panted. Eddie licked your neck clean. “God you taste incredible.” He said as he kissed his way up your neck. You realized you still hadn’t even kissed him yet. You tugged his face up by his hair and crushed your lips onto his. You could taste the metallic tang of your own blood lingering on his lips. The kiss was heated, all tongue and teeth, but you couldn’t care less. It was just what you needed.
You both pulled away, gasping for air. “Fuck sweetheart, if I would’ve known biting you turned you on this much I would’ve done it hours ago.” Eddie smirked. “Eddie, I need you.” You were a whining mess, but you were so far gone you didn’t care how you sounded. “Yeah? Then beg for it, pretty girl. I wanna hear you beg for my cock.” And beg you did. “Please Eddie. I need you so bad. Need to feel you inside me.” You were breathless. “There’s my good girl. God I missed you.” Eddie said as he reached down to unzip his jeans.
You had been so worked up you hadn’t realized the bulge in Eddie’s jeans. Or rather the size of the bulge in Eddie’s jeans. The second you laid eyes on his length, your jaw dropped. Now Eddie had always been on the bigger side, but this was huge. Eddie laughed at your expression. “Yeah that’s another thing that changed. Figured I’d surprise you.” He said with a wink. “Eddie, I could just barely take you before. How am I supposed to now?” You asked, bewildered. “Guess I’ll just have to get you ready first.”
Eddie practically tore your jeans and underwear off. His head dove down between your legs. “Missed this pretty pussy so much.” His hot breath fanning over your core. You didn’t even have a chance to respond before you felt his tongue lick from your folds up to your aching clit. The moan you let out went straight to Eddie's painfully hard cock.
Eddie ate you out like a starved man. His tongue delved through your folds, collecting your slick. He made his way up to your clit, tongue circling around it. You moaned embarrassingly loud as you felt him plunge two of his fingers into your core. The combination of Eddie's fingers hitting that spot deep inside of you that made your toes curl and the circles his tongue was making on your clit had you teetering over the edge in seconds.
“Don’t stop Eddie. God please don’t stop.” You begged. “Gonna cum for me sweet girl? Go on, be my good girl and cum for me.” Eddie groaned against your cunt. The vibrations from his voice sent you over the edge. Your first orgasm crashed over you like the strongest of waves. You felt as though you were floating. Eddie brought you back down to earth by rubbing your thighs soothingly.
You lifted your head up to smile down at Eddie. “There she is, my beautiful girl.” You pulled Eddie up until his face was leveled with yours. Eddie tapped the side of your jaw with two fingers. “Open.” You obeyed and watched as he spit into your mouth. You moaned as you swallowed. “Such a good girl. And all it took was for me to die to finally get you to listen.” Eddie said teasingly.
“God just shut up and fuck me already.” You smirked as you reached between your bodies and grabbed his length. “Still got quite a mouth on you though. Careful or I’ll have to wipe that smirk right off your face.” Eddie said as he pinned both your arms above your head with one hand. “Is that a threat or a promise?” You smiled slyly. “I think you already know the answer to that question.” Eddie said as he started to slide into you.
You gasped as you felt him slowly start to fill you. The stretch was unlike anything you’ve ever felt before. It burned, but in the most delicious way possible. Eddie stilled inside of you once he bottomed out, letting you adjust to his length. “You all good baby?” Eddie asked, searching for discomfort of any kind on your face. “Fuck-yes-god Eddie please just move.” Eddie smirked as he slowly started to pull out of you, only to slam right back in.
The scream you let out was guttural. Eddie quickly moved to cover your mouth with his free hand. “Quiet pretty girl. You don’t want us getting caught do you?” Eddie asked as he slammed into you again, causing another muffled scream to rip through your throat. “I asked you a question.” You quickly shook your head no. “Good girl.” Eddie praised as he started to thrust into you with no remorse.
Eddie brought you closer to the edge with every thrust. The tip of his cock hitting that certain spot inside of you every time. You were a screaming, writhing mess under him. Your eyes started to tear up from how good it all felt. It wasn’t until Eddie moved his hand down between your bodies and started making lazy circles on your clit, that the tears started to fall. You had never felt this much pleasure before. It was too much and not enough all at the same time.
“Aww baby, you crying from how good my cock feels?” You nodded vigorously. “Poor girl. Can’t even talk you're so cock drunk.” Eddie sped up his circles on your clit. “Cmon sweet girl, cum for me. I wanna see how good I make you feel.” His words were all you needed to finally send you over the edge. Your second orgasm was even more intense than the first. You felt yourself gush around Eddie’s cock. “F-fuck baby, you just squirted. God you’re fucking insatiable.”
You felt Eddie’s movements start to falter. You could tell he was close. “Shit- where do you want it?” Eddie asked. You opened your mouth in response. “You’re a goddamn vixen.” Eddie muttered under his breath as he shuffled up your body. He jerked himself only a couple of times before he was spurting ropes of cum onto your tongue. You swallowed every last bit, not wanting any to go to waste.
Eddie leaned down to kiss you passionately. He could taste himself on your tongue. The kiss was slow and gentle. You were the first to pull away. “That was-“ “I know.” You giggled. “What?” Eddie asked smiling. “It’s just-who would’ve known vampires could be so good at sex.” Eddie playfully slapped your arm. “Shut up.” He said teasingly.
You laid in Eddie’s arms as he traced shapes into the small of your back. “Can you promise me something?” You asked, breaking the silence that had fallen between you both. “Anything.” Eddie said, without hesitation. “Promise me you’ll never leave me again.” You turned your head to look into his eyes. “Baby I promise. After what just happened, you are never getting rid of me.” Eddie teased as he squeezed your shoulder. You giggled softly.
“I love you..” You whispered.
“Forever and always.” Eddie whispered back as he kissed the top of your head.
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beesmygod · 2 months
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old hunters DLC also highlights some themes of colonial violence and exploitation too, imo. what’s been done to the fishing village and kos ties the beast thing up with this idea that like, the impulse to Conquer and Dominate another leads directly to the Curse. It’s not enough to understand the old ones and the blood and all that, they needed to control it, to take it for themselves, and exploit it however they can. And now there’s wolfmans everywhere.
And this is in the core gameplay loop itself, we extract all the vials and blood echos and blood gems that we can in order to become strong enough to conquer more and more powerful prey. When we’re hit, we hit back harder and take back the life that was taken for us. Sure it’s ostensibly to Break the Curse and seek Paleblood and all that, but we know why we’re really doing it. Because it’s sick as hell, and feels awesome to best these monsters. The old hunters knew that too, and it turns them into giant horse creatures unable to do anything besides violence. That thirst for violence and power makes hunters turn into beasts, now only functioning as a cog in a perpetual violence machine. They lose their humanity not through repeated death like in Dark Souls, but through taking life. It turns the characters into monsters, and the players into wiki editors and lore theorists (aka monsters) bc we also can’t let go of the feeling Bloodborne gives us.
Tl;dr: Bloodborne is like if Spec Ops had any subtlety or desire to leave itself up to interpretation (probably helped by the fact that very little of what I’m talking about is likely intentional and I’m just insane)
OKAY im back from my appointment and finished my little treat. anon ("anon" @chicknparm who should get credit for these good thoughts) i could not agree more. i mentioned this in a previous post but finding a strand of commentary about the evils of colonialism made me worried i was becoming dangerously online, but it's a relief to see someone else mention this idea. i think you are absolutely right that one of the overt messages in bloodborne is that spilling blood for your own benefit leads to ruin. its actually kind of shocking how, in spite of the combat being the draw to these games, the message of most fromsoft games is a message of anti-violence. like, how many times do we end up fighting something that, in hindsight, needed to be put out of its misery. oh. shit. thinking about it, our player character is explicitly an outsider. the role of hunter of hunter is filled by outsiders...
also lol you are so right about the wiki based insanity but i think that's the consequences of insight poisoning. literally every once in a while while trying to edit this stupid bloodborne doc i think to myself "oooeergg too many eyes" and take a break for a few days
anyway, turning this back around to the colonialism theme, hear us out ok: watching/reading the sekiro lore videos/posts by shetani of shetani's lair helped introduce a lot of esoteric buddhist and shinto concepts that were totally novel and unknown to be as a baka gaijin. now these ideas are impossible not to see in all of from's other works.
i did a few days of research on "shinshi" (mostly a lot of stuff that turned out to not be relevant, but interesting) after becoming aware of them and found they shared a lot of qualities with the augurs (or "phantasms", invertebrates that act as intermediaries to the great ones) of bloodborne. realizing this, i thought about the great ones not in the context of a christian god, as the MODERN yharnam does, but as kami. kami are numerous, everywhere, hidden, and are thought of as actively controlling or influencing the terrestrial world. the re-translation reveals that the "great pthumeru chalice" had some nuance lost in translation: "祀る - Means to enshrine or worship, but has connotations of doing it to appease spirits so they may reach nirvana or Buddhahood and avoid becoming evil"; this is simply translated to "deify" which is technically correct but the original feels like it's much more pointed about finally revealing to the player that the "gods" as we've been lead to believe them to be are not what they seem.
the healing church, a product of georgian to victorian era western beliefs, razed pthumeru, loran, isz, and the fishing village (and probably yahar'gul too) in the quest to become like their newly discovered gods. the framework by which they related to pthumerian culture was completely wrong and misunderstood the nature of "gods" as all knowing or all powerful and, thus, something aspirational. the reality was more that they are just another type of creature in the world with different limitations than a human. and they're still mortal.
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