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roofcatfanart · 2 years

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Had a thought about Linked Universe and it spiraled into this au.

So this au takes place before the beginning of Legend of Zelda when the Golden Goddesses where making the world and before making the tri force. There were other gods before but it's not important, what was important is that the gods could curse mortals and expel them from where ever they had lived

These curses ranged from being completely changed into a creature to never being able to enter a domain of a god without dying.

And this explains how there are many different creatures as well as races in hyrule.

Now The First Hero comes from a line of people cursed by a god because his ancestor chose to help people that the god forsaken because the people didn't pray to it, so the god cursed his line to never be welcomed in any kingdom unless they forsake the people. The ancestor said fuck that and moves the people somewhere better while the curse mutated into staying until the line turned selfish.

After that his ancestor made a place for the cursed, people who denied the gods who would eventually become Gerudo, people who chose to be humble became Goron, those that refused to be culled by the sea gods became Zora and the gentle kind people were made minish.

But The First Hero's cursed had changed as the bloodline intersected with other curses, changing him to be able to fulfill another's curse and set them free.

And The First Hero made his choice to help people, when then he met the minor gods Demise and Hylia.

Demise and Hylia where minor gods at first with Demise being a flame god and Hylia being an owl goddess. They met by The First Hero helping their followers with a cursed villager. They were more distracted by each other then The Hero but after The First Hero stayed in the area to help they both became infatuated and tried to wingman for each other.

The First Hero then pointed out he didn't like gods (bc of all the curses like 20% of all people where cursed) so could they not?

That just got them deeper, because this mortal doesn't give a shit if they were gods so they help him out. And The First Hero kind of started to fall for these two gods willing to face the wrath of more powerful gods. So he fell hard and gave in to their asks for courtship. But he made them promise him to never bind a mortal to them, cursed or made into champions by birth.

And at this point Demise had challenged the god of Demons for his title to stop curses and Hylia the god of Light to. So it's fine, it's going well for the three lovers.

But time is the worst enemy of any god and The First Hero is mortal, no matter how the curse extended his family's life, his age is slowly catching up.

And now Demise and Hylia face the death of their love, something they can not change because of The First Hero's curse, having twisted beyond any gods domain.

But The First Hero knows that there are only three gods that can help him, so he travels beyond the world into the plane of the Golden Godesses, asking them for a solution to he lovers dilemma.

The Goddesses told him that they would on the condition that he does not tell the other two what he had asked, only that he has found a solution. They would test his resolve, sending gods to kill him one by one, if he lived through the end of the month, they would make the lovers their avatars in this world.

The First Hero excepted and the trial began. It was fine, there were only three days left when the rumors of the tri force came. Hylia and Demise were tempted, the power that could make gods out of mortals, a solution to their worries of loss.

They made a plan and on the last day of the trial they snuck into the greater plane and stole the tri force of power. But in this they left The First Hero alone to fight the final god

And The First Hero faced an enemy he could not defeat, not without the wisdom of Hylia or the Strength of Demise. The god he faced was the one who casted his curse, and here after centuries, the slighted god killed The First Hero.

And the two gods watched as the man they loved was cut down.

Their grief was so eminence yet their rage was blinding as they killed the god who killed their mortal.

They grieved together, morning their love, yet they had to face the consequences of stealing from the Golden Goddesses.

So Hylia was forced to watch over the tri force while Demise was tossed back into his kingdom.

And yet Demise had the anger and grief to listen to the whispers in his court as Hylia heard the whispers of the gods. Who else would each side blame.but the other god? Who else would have tried.to make themselves look better by giving their lover godhood?

And yet in their grief they listened to poisonous words, their hate grew to the point when they stood face to face, the surface of the land scarred and armies raging all they could see was the god who failed their lover.

So that was the beginning and this continues for the Linked Universe kinda which is the reason I thought of it.

So The First Hero is gonna be nicknamed Courage bc originally the Golden Goddesses intended for each of the lovers to hold a piece incase something happens but that got fucked up so the balance of the world was destroyed and that's why the cycle hasn't ended, because Courage was supposed to fulfill the role to help keep Hylia and Demise from getting too much on each other's nerves.

Courage is both exactly like Link and both incredibly different. He was very patient and kind having chose to help but he also wanted to not give more people grief since any child of his would have his curse of only being welcomed briefly even in cursed communities, ignoring the fact they would be gods and outlive him no matter if he wanted a large family. He's painfully familiar with horrible kings and gods but wi9tey his best anyway.

Now by the time BOTW rolls around the Golden Goddesses are feed up with Hylia and Demise's pretty much petty ex fighting (Zelda and Link falling in love is salt on a wound since Link is so much like the gods dead lover) and since making the hero's spirit into the almost carbon copy of their lover isn't working they resort to the big guns. Doesn't help that Link Verse is happening so the two gods fucked the world up more.

They pull out Courage from the dead, slap godhood on him and ship him out to the links. Now Courage is many things but being chucked out of heaven told to "fix your lovers they fucked up" while trying to get use to being alive as well as being tossed to and from places is not having a good time and this close to figuring out a way to kill the Golden Goddesses.

Courage is found by the Links and is momentarily detracted from killing the Golden Goddesses and travels with them. He falls in with them frighteningly easily, but he knows that it's because they were him, they echoed his soul in a similar way but he didn't actually know if they were family or descendants of his family.

Until they explained the reincarnation cycle and Courage is so angry that he activates his godhood and meets Demise and Hylia in the limbo of where the gods reside now.

Demise and Hylia are both incredibly happy and confused at how Courage is alive until he opens his mouth and screams at them why the hell did they break their promise, it was the only thing he asked of them and the condition that he married them on and if their marriage vows mean so little them they can forget about him loving them.

So Courage is pulled back to his body and the Links are justifiably like wtf. Courage explains the speal above while Demise and Hylia are calling counsel of all their reincarnations for help on getting Courage to remarry them and the Zelda's and Ganons are awkwardly side eyeing each other what the hell is going on.

So Courage travels with the links, becoming the father he.never got to be and helping time with keeping everyone safe until the meet up with a Zelda and Hylia appears.

And Courage asked her if she even knows what hes made at her for and she doesn't know so he tells her that utill her and Demise know why he mad don't dare try and take him back.

Hylia is begging while the Links and Zelda are both in awe at this man denying the goddess and confused at why he also said Demise.

And the dynamics is Demise and Hylia being exs working together to try and win Courage back while he takes the kids in the divorce.

But in more of a serious tone and more angst of Courage hating how they did to the world what was done to him, forcing children to be heroes and giving men no choice in being consumed by hatred.

And the tri force is trying to deal with a god who's actively trying to keep them alive and cares for their well being.

Not sure about how the power forces would work but the Zeldas are having a time between having a father that doesn't expect them to be great and the goddess acting like a teenager trying to win back an ex.

The ganons are also having a time with Demise reviving them without rage to try and win back his ex.

Then they get the bright idea of working together and it goes from awkward to down right embarrassing because now the Zeldas and Ganons have to work together, with both gods telling their followers about it.

Surprisingly this ends up helping the prowler and wisdom to get along and fix the damage of their realm if only to stop Hylia and Demise from spouting more stories about their beloved.

The Links are simply vibing and having a great time watching Courage tossing Hylia and Demise on their asses when they don't answer correctly.

And then they remember when Skyward Sword Zelda said that is was sad that so many times the cycle started. They gathered everyone together because this would be it.

So they said that he was mad because they bounded mortals to them to fight a battle that wasn't theirs.

And Courage smiled sadly, that it was the promise they made on marriage, the one condition he had yet they broke it. How could he trust them if they ruined everything he tried to do as a hero, ruin and hurt the people he protected?

And they couldn't, not really but he took their hands and said if they ended the cycle he would be willing to try again and never again would mortals fight their battles.

They agreed, and Courage stayed with the Links telling them while he couldn't fix their times they would be they only heros.

And it ends with the gods trying again and the trio's doing their best to fix their times.

Mostly ended up being that the Hero is rightfully mad that their pissing fight hurt so many people and the gods treatment at the Links while everyone else is wondering how the fuck this man who looks like an 50's to 60's old link is cussing out the gods and gaining custody of all their reincarnations while having said gods rat out of his palm

Bonus Reunion doodle:

#loz oc #loz demise #loz hylia #linked universe #legend of zelda #au #demise #hylia #honestly feel free to ask more I genuinely want to talk about it #might also write it out too #firsthero au #also would be hilarious to think they all get reincarnated and the three of them get divorced #but Courage owns a coffee shop that they akk frequent since they are all in college #the ganons and zekdas are going to better the system while the Links are simply vibing at studying for farming or travelling #they find out that Courage divorced Demise and Hylia and it ends up being like the parent trap #but Demise and Hylia are disasters trying to get back the funtional Courage #the trio's aren't helping its pay back for harsh grading #Demise is the History teacher and Hylia is the Liture teacher #so everyone had them

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mtreebeardiles · 1 year

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The Odd Trio, pt 1

Also over on AO3!

In the end, he blamed the boxes.

Little changes here and there over the course of months had been easy enough for Shawn to ignore, to see without seeing, to hear without listening, clinging to the idea that if he just refused to acknowledge the problem, the problem would go away. Illogical and he knew it, but admitting he knew it went against the rules of the game he'd made up inside his head, so he ignored that, too. Turned a blind eye to all of it really, from the slow emptying of shelves, to less and less groceries being bought, to longer interludes where Evvy and Kaidan spent more time on the planet down below.

It started with the announcement that they were house-hunting. Shawn ignored this. Then came house-buying. Shawn ignored this, too. Then came a date set, a time to go with the place, circled in red marker on the calendar that glared at him every morning when he made his coffee.

He pretended he didn't know what it was for.

But the boxes had the audacity of blocking the front staircase. Neatly stacked, clearly labeled, undoubtedly a nod to Kaidan's far superior organization skills, and it hit Shawn like a shuttle to chest. He stood there, frozen on the steps, fingers tight around his mostly-empty cup of coffee, all thoughts of what he intended to do once he got down to the first floor of their apartment flying from his head and replaced with a sense of dread so intense he wondered if maybe he'd throw up.

This isn't happening.

The boxes continued to block his path.

They're not really leaving me here all by myself.

And technically… they weren't. Shawn knew that. Knew he wasn't the only one Evvy was leaving the apartment, knew their more recent roommates were staying put just as surely as Shawn was.

But Joker and EDI weren't Evvy and Kaidan; it just wasn't the same.

Shawn turned on his heel and marched back up the stairs, head buzzing with so much white noise that didn't start to clear until he'd pushed his way into the master bedroom, and only then so that feeling of dread could take center stage again. All the things he'd been ignoring were hitting him one after the other -- the walk-in closet, empty of most of its clothes; more boxes in the bathroom, tops still open to hold whatever odds and ends had been left for these final days. New bedding, crisp and stiff and it made Shawn's skin crawl as he plopped down atop it, right across from a very startled Everett.

"Uh, Shawn? You…okay?"

"You're actually leaving?"

Evvy blinked at him, frowning.

"…yes?"

"Like…actually, though?"

The frown deepened.

"Shawn, we've talked about this -- we showed you the pictures of the house. It's on the calendar."

"Yeah, but…"

His brother watched him, bafflement at war with a growing concern. Shawn didn't like that; he didn’t like to see Evvy worried, or in pain, or broken down.

And that's all this place ever does to him.

That, at least, Shawn hadn't been able to ignore.

It had started slow, but once it began it showed now signs of stopping. Everett's recovery had been long, painful, and arguably ongoing even to this day. But he was up and about, had some of his old energy back, ventured out more and more. He was visible again, noticed and noted, and he'd maybe had a handful of peaceful weeks before the bullshit started to come out in waves.

A hero's welcome wherever he went, slowly easing into questions he knew Everett had answers for as surely as he knew he didn't want to give them. Was he returning to active duty? Surely the Savior of the Galaxy had earned enough accolades for several promotions, to assume command on a bigger, broader stage. And if not that, then perhaps he'd find his niche in the Council -- surely he'd be an overwhelming favorite should it come down to an actual vote this time. Other suggestions, other speculations less common, but all had the same underlying message: what was Everett Shepard going to give to them this time? What part of his heart, his soul, his body, and his mind was next for them to consume, what role would he find himself in to let them take, and take, and take some more?

Because taking more from Everett Shepard had always been a given -- and no one had expected him to finally say no.

"He's retiring? He's not even thirty-five!"

"Nah, I don't buy it. He'll be back out there before you know it, setting records straight and making sure humanity gets its due after all this bullshit."

"He can't just give it all up -- what a fucking waste that would be! What's he gonna do, stay home and sit on his ass all day, watching TV? Work some regular ass job? Please."

Fame came with a lot of expectation, Shawn discovered, and Evvy's had always been soaked in blood.

But time marched on; Evvy didn't re-enlist. Showed zero interest in the Council. Hero worship slipped so easily into open contempt, and as the galaxy began to piece itself together its politics turned as toxic as ever. Some blamed him for the war; others blamed him for Earth being hit first. Some were convinced the danger wasn't past, and insisted he do something about it. Insisted, really, that he owed them all something: owed them for their own pain, their own losses, their own shredded sense of normalcy. Receipts gathered only to be thrown in his face, what-about-isms running rampant, criticisms for the choices he'd been forced to make throughout the war. After all he'd done, all he'd orchestrated in the name of giving them all a chance, and it wasn't enough.

It would never be enough.

You can't take this from him, too.

Even if the idea of not having him around so much made his chest hurt and his eyes smart.

"Shawn?"

"Could've given me more warning, you know."

Evvy's frown inched from concern to outright disbelieving. "…Shawn, we talked about this months ago."

"Yeah! Well! That's hardly enough time for someone to consider life-altering events!"

"'Life-altering --' what? You're still living here!"

"Without you and Kay! With Joker and EDI! What if we don't get along!"

"They've been living here for nearly a year!"

"With us, and now it's gonna be just me! What if they try to change things --"

"--like what?"

"I don't know! What if Joker decides to sit on the right side of the couch? That's my side!"

"The apartment has like five couches, Shawn."

"And the right side of each is mine."

"I'm sure it won't be a problem."

"And I like the cupboards arranged a certain way! And the shelves! What if he decides on a whim that Kaidan's method is out and his own dumb system is better!"

"I don't think anyone would accuse Joker of being particularly 'whimsical.'"

"He better not be," Shawn muttered darkly. "I don't have the patience for that shit."

Evvy's lips twitched, curving ever so slightly upwards and he shook his head.

"You're allowed to say you'll miss us, Shawn. It's okay."

"Pssh, yeah, right, this isn't about missing you it's about Joker's terrible taste in movies…"

"Shawn."

He bit at the inside of his lip, but forced himself to meet Evvy's eyes. His brother scooted closer, resting his hands on both of Shawn's shoulders and giving a little squeeze.

"You're going to be okay," he said. "And it's not like you can't come visit, yeah?"

Shawn stared at him a moment, that awful feeling of dread twisting him up inside.

He pushed it back down again.

"…yeah." He dropped his gaze, swiping impatiently at his eyes. Everett sighed, giving his shoulders another squeeze.

"C'mere."

He gave a tug and Shawn didn't resist, letting his brother pull him into a hug.

"You're gonna be okay, Shawn," Everett murmured again, holding him tight. "Trust me."

And Shawn didn't answer, his throat too tight and the words too hard for him to find, so he just held him right back.

Held him tight, and hoped that he was right.

#back to Disaster Shawn #Shawn Shepard #Everett Shepard #mshep clone #mshep #Mass Effect #my writing #The Odd Trio

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paranormal-potatoes · 1 year

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I do feel like I should note that from maybe day 1 of playing Dark Parables (and there's a definite chance this was unconscious projecting on my part) I've seen the detective as a trans man. I say unconscious projecting bc I hadn't come to the conclusion of transness yet. I also somehow completely missed that novelization in Briar Rose. so.

#i feel like in games where you can customize the character appearance i tend to make/use fem ocs bc they tend to have more options #and ones where you can't do that I'll lean towards masc/male ocs #anyways. love my gay depressed ray of sunshine disaster detective #he and briar are besties #until sky kingdom and then leonard joins their trio #he (leonard) gets a crush on one of the red riding hood sisters and john happily takes on the role of encouraging older brother #john is both friend shaped and brother shaped #he Does not care if someone is older than him. he will be big brother if he needs to #and then ballad of rapunzel happens and he has his breakdown and finally goes to therapy #and after that he takes on a mentor role with belladonna bc they both have touch/hand based powers #that are largely dangerous to people around them #anyways im rambling and need to sleep #potato talks #potato rambles in tags #i need to get back to my dark parables fics

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hp-hcs · 3 months

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• smut • literally everyone here is so problematic (but oh, so hot) [part 2 of drunk words, sober thoughts] — best friend! dom top! jealous! theodore nott x gn! bottom/receiving! dumbass! reader x best friend! switch! jealous! manwhore! mattheo riddle

tysm to the anon who gave me this idea ur a real one 🤲👑

okay so like, i never really state it in text but like, reader, theo, and mattheo have been like a best friend trio since first year alr?

working on a part three rn you silly lil horndogs

read the title man idk

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

“We can’t keep doing this,” you mumbled, but your head still tilted to the side to grant him better access.

“Why not?” He asked, kissing along the newly-freed skin of your neck and lightly biting down on your collarbone.

You let out a breathy half-moan. “We can’t- this isn’t fair for either of us. I can’t give you a real relationship.”

“I don’t care about that,” he said dismissively, tilting his head up to suck on the sensitive flesh on the underside of your jaw. “As long as I can have you in my bed.”

“How romantic,” you deadpan.

He laughed, shutting you up with yet another sharp thrust of his hips. “Never said I was, darlin’.”

You gasped and moaned. “Fuck! Th-there!”

He followed your directions, gripping your hips tighter and driving into you with renewed vigor.

Your thighs trembled and your nails raked along his back as you came with a low moan of his name.

He followed right after you, moaning and burying his face into the side of your neck. His hair, damp with sweat, brushed against your jaw, making you smile as you felt him shake above you.

He caught his breath after a moment, pulling out and rolling off of you. “You know that you can’t just keep sleeping with me to forget about him, right?”

“Oh, c’mon. Like you’re gonna complain? Don’t you want a hot-albeit-emotional-disaster such as myself in your bed?”

“I mean, I’m not gonna say no to that,” he snickered, reaching over the side of his bed to retrieve his shirt from the pile of discarded clothes before tugging it over your head and helping you get your arms through the sleeves. He laid back down so you could curl into his side, wrapping an arm around your middle and mindlessly running his fingers up and down your side.

You both lay in a comfortable silence for a moment before you quietly murmured, “Thank you.”

“For the sex or the pep talk?” He teased, running a gentle hand through your hair.

“Both,” you give him a half smile, leaning up to kiss his cheek. “But really, I mean it. Thank you, Mattheo.”

~~~

“That’s it, shit- yeah, fuck,” Mattheo moaned, dropping his quill on his desk in favor of threading his fingers through your hair. “So good- so damn good at this.”

You’d really thought you’d be able to go to the library with Mattheo after school “to study”. And you were doing plenty of that, if studying what that fine Riddle dick looks like up close is going to be a question on your Charms exam. Which, y’know, it probably won’t.

You could feel your legs cramping up from being curled up in a kneeling position underneath the table for the past ten minutes, but that didn’t stop you from tightening your grip on his thighs and taking him down as far as you could go.

His grip on your hair tightened in warning. “Shit- someone’s coming,” he hissed.

You pulled off of him just to sassily respond with, “Yeah, you.”

With just a few pumps of your fist, wrapped tight around his dick, Mattheo fell apart in the middle of the library.

~~~

“Fuck! Yes- shit!” Mattheo groaned and cursed.

“Shut the fuck up,” you hissed. “Are you trying to get caught?”

“I won’t claim to not be an exhibitionist,” he said in a mock-serious tone. “Besides, tell me this isn’t a hot place to fuck.”

“This isn’t a hot place to fuck,” you scoffed as you tightened your legs around his waist. “If I drown in this damn lake ‘cause of you, I will haunt your bitchass.”

~~~

“You seem to be awfully…close with Matt right now,” Theo said in an odd, stilted tone.

“Yeah,” you said shortly. “We are.”

“That’s…nice, I guess.” Theodore cleared his throat. “Riddle’s cool.”

“Yup,” you said in a bored tone, not even sparing a glance in his direction.

Theo huffed out an annoyed sigh, abandoning his fruitless questioning. “Whatever. Can you pass the butter?”

~~~

“Am I interrupting something?”

“Yeah, kinda.” Mattheo drawled.

“Apologies, won’t happen again,” Theo sneered, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning against the door frame as he surveyed the scene in front of him.

His longtime crush, sprawled out naked on his best friend’s bed. He kept his eyes trained pointedly at your faces, making no acknowledgment of the fact that Mattheo was three fingers deep inside you.

“So, like- this is real awkward,” Mattheo licked his lips and pursed them, unabashedly meeting Theo’s gaze and quirking an eyebrow. “You can either leave or come in, but either way, you gotta shut the door, man. That’s just common courtesy.”

Theo scoffed. “Are you seriously suggesting I stay?”

“I’m not not seriously suggesting you stay.”

“I’m not watching my best friends have sex, you fuckin’ freak.”

“Shit, what d’ya want me to say then, Mr. Prude?” Mattheo rolled his eyes. “You rather join in?”

“I’m not having a threesome with my best friends!”

“Coward.”

Theo spluttered out a protest that fell on deaf ears.

“Boys, boys, we get it. You’re both pretty,” you say dryly. “Either stay or don’t, Nott, but I’m getting fucked either way.”

Theo hesitated at the doorway before cursing under his breath and stepping inside and shutting the door behind him. “I hate you both.”

“We hate you too,” you and Mattheo replied dryly in unison.

Theo scoffed and took a hesitant step closer. He chewed on his bottom lip nervously and looked at you as he sat awkwardly on the edge of the bed. “What about the…y’know, disagreement?”

You rolled your eyes. “Oh, I’m still mad at you for that.”

“Yeah, and I’m mad at you too!” Mattheo interjected before leaning in to loudly whisper to you, “What exactly are we mad at him for?”

“Teddy’s only been my friend for the last six years because he thought he’d get lucky.” You said through a tight smile.

“That’s not- I- I mean, it kind of is, but- it’s-”

“That’s kind of a dick thing to do, Teddy,” Mattheo said in a mocking tone.

“Oh, shut the fuck up, Riddle. Like you’re not doing the exact same thing!”

“Wait, what?” You interrupted at that, but the boys continued arguing.

“You don’t get to call dibs on a person, Nott!”

“You don’t get to hook up with your best friend's crush, Riddle!”

“Oh, like you’re one to talk,” Mattheo seethed.

“Boys!” You snapped suddenly.

They both went dead silent, looking over at you with matching deer-in-headlights expressions like they’d forgotten you were there—despite the fact that you were the literal topic of their argument.

“Are you done with the damn fighting?” You prompted, your eyes narrowing.

“Yes, Y/n,” both boys chorused sheepishly, only to shoot each other glares when they thought you weren’t looking.

“Good boys,” you taunted. “Now, kiss and make up.”

“What? I’m not going to-” Theo spluttered.

“I wasn’t asking, Theodore.”

“Fine,” Theo seethed in annoyance, grabbing Mattheo by the back of his neck and yanking him into a harsh kiss. There was no romance there. No lust, no real passion. Just jealousy and anger.

Mattheo, ever the slut, still moaned and grabbed onto Theo’s hips to pull him closer, practically climbing into his lap.

Theo growled, biting down hard on his bottom lip. Mattheo whimpered and unabashedly started grinding against Theo’s thigh, moaning like a goddamn Muggle porn star.

“Fucking whore,” Theo hissed against his lips, shoving him back down onto his bed. “Thought I could trust you.”

“What, so it’s okay for you to incessantly chase Y/n, but when I do it, I’m a whore?”

“Yes!”

“That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard, Nott.”

You rolled your eyes at their pettiness. “For the love of Merlin- you’re both stupid, how about that?”

They pause their bickering to glance over at you.

“What did you just call us, darlin’?” Mattheo asked in a suspiciously calm voice, seemingly unbothered by the fact that his best-friend-slash-current-enemy-slash-crush-stealer was actively straddling him and busying himself by nibbling and sucking at Mattheo’s neck.

A sarcastic comment died in your throat as you watched them interact. Despite Theo being preoccupied, coaxing tiny sounds out of Mattheo’s mouth with every jealousy-fueled nip at his neck, his gaze remained locked on yours.

You gulped. You’d been so confident before, but now they were staring at you with matching expressions of jealousy, possessiveness, and lust.

Ah.

Whoops.

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call-me-strega · 4 months

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Dc x Dp Prompt # 12: Wanna Help Me Win a Bet?

So our scene opens with an older team Phantom (Everlasting trio, Jazz, Val, and Dani) at a bar/club of some sort in New York. They're all catching up on how their lives are going (college, work, internships, milestones, travels, wacky happenings, etc.). Somehow the topic shifts to romantic relationships and the gang begins ribbing Danny for his awkward teen romances. He was an absolute disaster at flirting even if his exes found it charming at the time. It's all good-natured and fun.

Then Danny's like "Hey well least I've improved now" which earns him an eyebrow raise or two. The gang goes "Oh yeah? Prove it. Bet you 100 bucks you can't get that person's number" *points to an attractive black-haired individual sitting at the bar*. And of course, since Danny isn't one to back down from a bet and has his pride to defend he goes off to flirt with a stranger.

On the flip side, we have a Batfam member (or other black-haired DC character) of your choosing (you already know my fav is Jason) sitting at the bar. Why are they there? Idk maybe it's for a case? Maybe they wanted to meet up with friends outside of Gotham? You decide. Anyways, the point is that their minding their own business when a fairly attractive twunk walks up and starts hitting on them awkwardly. And man, this guy is not smooth in the slightest but he's dorky and awkward and kinda cute. They talk to him a bit, teasing and doing some light flirting back. They aren't taking him too seriously, really they're more amused than anything else.

Finally, the guy kinda just gives up trying to be smooth and sighs. He looks at them with a serious look on his face and goes "Look I'll level with you, my friends over there bet me a 100 bucks I wouldn't be able to successfully flirt with you. I'm gonna lean over and whisper in your ear and if you could just agree laugh like I said something witty and give me your number then I'll split the cash with you."

Then he leans over and whispers "Whaddya say, wanna help me win a bet?"

And they let out a genuine laugh and go "You know what? Sure, why not. You're not half-bad and I won't say no to an easy 50" and they grab a napkin, pull a pen out of seemingly nowhere, and give Danny their number (and their Venmo/PayPal/cash app or whatever). They hang out a bit more that night before going their separate ways. A day or two later they get a notification that someone sent them $50 and a message "wanna get coffee/lunch/dinner sometime?"

#dc x dp #danny fenton #team phantom #winning a bet #bad flirting #danny's got that awkward wet cat boy-failure type of rizz but in a good way #pick a ship any ship #my go to is #dead on main #this would also work well with dead silent or brain dead (dead tired?) or whatever kon x danny's ship name is #Strega’s dc x dp prompt

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ofoceansandtombsanew · 10 months

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15:30 ー GOJOU SATORU. i like you best when you're annoying me.

saying you hated gojou satoru would be overexaggerating. no, a more accurate sentiment would be dislike.

you can respect gojou satoru.

you can even, at your most awake, tolerate him.

but he was most certainly a thorn in your side for the better part of your knowing each other the past three years. he was an annoyance, an arrogant one. but you suppose if your birth had literally shaken up the world of jujutsu as the world knew it, you'd probably have the attitude to match yourself. but your birth hadn't shaken up the world of jujutsu and your disposition matched it as one of the blessed average sorcerers forced to watch your cocky classmate be bestowed the title "the strongest".

he was obnoxious,

loud,

and quite frankly, not as charming as he believed himself to be though the amount of people who get wrapped into his whims might argue against you.

but this gojou satoru, the one sitting on the steps of jujutsu tech quietly and alone is a sight too strange for you to adjust to. you'd seen him once a year before after the disaster that was the star plasma vessel mission he'd failed. somehow, this satoru was even more depressed than that.

it had been no business of yours that suguru had seemed out of it lately. you hadn't really been friends with any of the other three people in your class, preferring company elsewhere in the school. satoru's friends were his friends and yours were yours. but to the one of the trio who'd been definitively closest to the defector of your entire organization, you supposed for satoru that hit even more than the loss of amanai riko.

so despite wanting to quietly walk by and leaving the boy to his thoughts, you somehow find yourself giving a light kick to his infinity and drawing his attention.

"did you want something?" satoru peers at you from his lowered shades.

"was just checking to see if i'd finally nail you with a kick before i head off to enoshima," you shrug. "looks like it's not my lucky day after all."

"nope, sorry, i'm a master now," satoru's smiling but it isn't reaching his eyes. you weren't a fan of his eyes despite loving the color blue. you'd sooner tell him to get a pair of brown contacts if he ever took his sunglasses off, you vaguely remember telling him that once as first years. you decide you hate the color of his eyes that are swamped in depression and sadness even more. "it'll take a lot more than that to throw me off my game."

dull eyes, eyebags and with faked bravado he's probably hoping you won't comment on.

you pinch the bridge of your nose with a sigh. i'm no match for someone who looks like a kicked puppy. "look, we're not friends," you start rest your hands on your hips as satoru's expression morphs from surprised to unamused. "i can barely stand you on the best of the days and on the worst i pray a bus stronger than your infinity will hit you. if i knew that coming in when i did would result in the two of us being in the same class for three years, i would have gone to kyoto or asked my parents to hold me back a year."

"geez, thanks, [first], i appreciate the warm words," satoru grumbles, decidedly bored of the conversation as he rested his chin on his palm once more.

"you're a loudmouth, you're rude, your eyes are a shade of blue i somehow can't stand and i'm pretty sure you're starting to tune me out," no surprise there. your words weren't exactly the warmest or the nicest. "my point is," you consider flicking him, but you keep your hands where you've left them when you remember infinity. "i like you best when you're annoying me. you being quiet and gloomy throws me off, so go back to being annoying."

when you've had enough of him staring at you as if you've suddenly grown a third head, you walk past him. "that's all i wanted to say," you mutter with more than a hint of finality as you walk past your special-grade classmate feeling as if your back was burning. he really does need brown contacts, you think with a huff. i'll tell shoko to cheer him up or something.

"[first]!" when you look over your shoulder, he's waving and the grin on his face looks a tad more real than the one he gave you a few moments ago. "when you get back from enoshima, i'll be as annoying as you want!"

you can't help a small smile of your own, "don't hurt yourself while you're doing it," you give a two-fingered salute back.

i should have just ignored him. if i knew he was gonna make me do this when i got back, i would have just ignored him.

"gojou, when i said i wanted you to go back to annoying me, this isn't what i meant," your eye is twitching as satoru throws an arm over your shoulder with a beam. he isn't using his infinity, that's good. you hope he keeps it off long enough for you to throw something at his face.

him roping you into helping him move his things into a new apartment after graduation was one thing; satoru roping you into his new venture into parenthood was an entirely different beast.

"come on, [first], don't you wanna be co-parents with me?" satoru laughs at your scowl. "we're partners!"

"no, i don't," you tell him pointedly and yet somehow you're still grabbing ingredients to make enough for four people and then some. "we're barely even fri-

satoru blinks at you with a deadpan expression, "but i already told the kids we would be taking care of them."

"we?"

"well, it's not like i know how to cook and everything shoko makes tastes like medicine," satoru replies like it's obvious. "you're the only saving grace here, please?"

"i hope you know i hate you," you finally reply after a moment. he wins, of course satoru wins.

"love you too, [first]," satoru chuckles, tossing in a bag of sweet treats into your shopping cart. "besides, we've been friends since you got back from enoshima months ago. i still remember the heart-warming speech you gave me on the staircase of jujutsu tech!"

"if what you got from what i said was an invitation for friendship, you need to get your ears cleaned," or at the very least he needed to stop sneaking bags of candy into the shopping cart.

satoru grins, "it's for the kids!"

you look at him all-knowing and unamused, "the kids don't need 5 bags of kit kats."

"not with that attitude."

the gojou fic i wanted to have up before i moved isn't going to be done until next month, but i'll feel bad not writing 2 months in a row so you guys can have this gojou timestamp to hold you over until then

#look she's writing #timestamp #jjk x reader #gojou x reader #gojo x reader #gojou satoru x reader #gojo satoru x reader

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ericshoney · 3 days

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Protective ~ Sturniolo triplets

You had thought that your Saturday was going to be a dull one. Not having any plans, you thought to just chill, game and probably watch movies all day. That was until Matt had messaged you asking if you wanted to spend the day with him, Chris and Nick. You agreed and said you'd head to their place soon.

As it was quite hot out, you slipped on a pair of light blue denim shorts, along with a white crop top and your trainers. You were happy with your outfit as you knew it wasn't only just simple and stylish, but would keep you cool too.

You then walked to the triplets place, which was luckily around the corner from your apartment. When you arrived, you walked in as the door was already unlocked waiting your arrival.

"Hey guys!" You greeted as you saw the trio sat on the sofa waiting for you, their heads buried in their phones.

"Hey, looking good!" Chris responded first.

"Thank you." You replied with a smile.

"Where are we going?" You then asked, as the brothers pulled away from their phones.

"We thought about the mall." Matt said, making you nod.

"Alright let's go!" Nick exclaimed.

You laughed at his sudden excitement as you headed to the car. You got in the back with Nick, as he started showing you some random TikToks as Matt drove and Chris played some music.

When you all arrived, you walked in seeing it wasn't too busy. You walked in the middle of Matt and Nick, Chris on Matt's left.

"Where to first?" Nick questioned.

"There!" You exclaimed, pointing to a store that had a sale on.

You headed off a bit before the guys, starting to look around at everything. Your eyes landed on some cool shirts that were half price.

"Hey beautiful~"

You looked over and saw a random guy standing next to you. You looked around and saw it was only you and him.

"Uh hey." You mumbled.

"That's a cool shirt, would look good on you." He said.

You remained silent, hoping if you ignored him, he'd leave, but he wasn't having it.

"How about I get your number, I'll buy you that shirt and take you on a date." He carried on.

"Who?" Nick called, suddenly appearing, along with Chris and Matt.

"Who...what?" The stranger questioned.

"Who the fuck are you." Nick replied.

"Just asking a pretty girl out, none of your business." He responded.

"She's not interested." Matt said, as Chris wrapped his arm around your shoulder, knowing you were uncomfortable.

"So fuck off." Nick said, waving his hands to send the stranger away.

The guy scoffed and walked off, as you sighed in relief.

"What a weirdo." Matt mumbled.

"You okay?" Chris asked softly.

"Yeah, thanks for showing up suddenly." You answered, giving the three a smile.

"Of course." Nick said, as Matt and Chris nodded.

You four then looked around all getting some stuff you liked, before heading to grab some food. As you headed to the food court, you noticed it was really busy. The guys noticed how uncomfortable you suddenly felt with so many people around, as they shared a look, all suddenly thinking the same thing.

"Drive thru." They said at the same time.

You all then headed back to the car, Chris' arm still wrapped around your shoulder in comfort as Nick and Matt walked in front of you.

After arriving back at the car, the four of you settled on McDonalds, Matt driving there and going through the drive thru as Nick ordered for all of you.

"You wanna head back to our place?" Matt suggested, looking back at you.

"Yeah, I don't want to deal with anymore strangers." You said with a small giggle.

"That I can agree on." Matt replied.

"That guy was a total creep though." Chris said.

"Totally. His approach was all wrong." Nick agreed.

"Maybe next time, wear jeans." Matt said jokingly.

"Whatever." You grumbled, making the boys laugh.

"But in all seriousness, we're here to save you from the creeps, the heartbreaks and the fashion disasters." Nick said.

"Your all just protective, but I love you all for it." You responded.

The three smiled as you headed on home, happy you had them by your side.

#sturniolo triplets #nick sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo #matt sturniolo #sturniolo triplets x reader #oneshot #sturniolo triplets oneshot #sturniolo triplets fanfic #matt sturniolo x reader #matthew sturniolo #nick sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #chris sturniolo x reader #christopher sturniolo #platonic #platonic relationships #fluff #protective #supportive

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f4nd0m-fun · 22 days

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DPxDC - Mafia Ties

Good parents Fenton and redeemed Vlad escaping to another universe with Danny, Jordan, Ellie, Jazz, Tucker, and Sam because of GIW chaos getting so bad they literally need to go to another world to get help, only for the portal to close, and they can't open it from this side. Jordan is Jazz's age maybe a year older and Ellie accidentally got deaged to her actual age give or take which is probably about a year and a half old. Yes it's the Family Breakfast ship.

@hallowsden

Cue Vlad doing his whole possession stuff to not only get them new identities but carefully accumulate a small amount of wealth, not enough to be suspicious in his opinion but still.

The Fenton parents start looking to see if/where this world has ectoplasm because the kids, and maybe Vlad, need it. Hel, maybe the parents accidentally need it too after all those years of exposure.

I know everyone chooses Gotham for this stuff, but also that's about the most I know about DC and it has a Lazarus pit underground so we're using it.

Vlad doesn't get back into the proper businessman profile, too many eyes for him to feel safe after the GIW disaster, but he does end up a Mafia boss, or at least tries. Also, Hood becomes a new 'son' obsession for him, yeah he has Danny and Jordan and Ellie but this kid is also ghosty and probably hungry or something, right?

Hood doesn't get what's up with this weird older man who always has a baby with him, let alone why he'd even bring a baby along to mafia stuff.

Vlad thinks it's safer to have Ellie in mafia meetings than be left with the Fentons during their research obsession periods because they will literally not pay attention to anything else unless it's an emergency, it's not their fault, they're learning to manage it though.

Speaking of Fentons, they work on clean energy manufacturing topside, but underground they deal with weapons. Mostly they supply them to Vlad's crew, since that's basically their testing grounds, but they also don't make anything that's actually lethal. Vlad isn't a fan of guns though but he isn't about to bring out his plasma blasts if there isn't a good reason. (He pretends anyone who sees him cackling like a maniac hit their head, he did say he hates using guns after all).

Jordan and Jazz are probably about 17/18 now. Jazz is going to college, while Jordan slips his way into the kid's mafia (yes he knows he's a kid now too, shut up, he used to be 24). This is half to annoy Vlad and half because he's curious. Jazz, of course, with a little help from both Vlad and Tucker in getting her grades moved between universes, is in college soon, and manages a full scholarship (not that Vlad wouldn't have paid if he still had his old money, in fact he might even be a little jealous that he wasn't the one to pay for her schooling).

Jordan looks a little more like Vlad than he does Jack, due to the way the ghost half fusion effects everything, but he also looks more like Jack than Maddie because Jack is what Danny would have grown into anyway.

Ellie of course just looks like a nearly carbon copy of Danny of course, just baby and female.

Danny, Sam, and Tucker are all going to Gotham Prep, if Vlad can't pay for Jazz's schooling then he's paying at just some for theirs (they might have partial scholarships but not full ride). Danny still sneaks out at night because he can't stand sitting still after a long time of being a vigilante and ends up running into the Bat. He promptly apologizes for invading his haunt and flees.

If any ships, I'm thinking Jazz/Jason and Jordan/Dick, but I'm a sucker for everlasting Trio and Tim also has a trio of his own.

Back to Ellie and Vlad. He of course is trying to keep any 'Meta' rumors on the downlow, but she's just a baby. The harness she's in is ghost proof mostly so she can't just phase out of it, but you try changing a baby's diaper and they just turn intangible, or put then down to nap when they start floating. Hel, imagine setting her down for two seconds, she accidentally makes a shield, and now she's crying because she wants to be held. Sure, Vlad and Danny both, Jordan and Ellie too, can go through shields in human form, but that doesn't mean it doesn't sting or something. Eventually it gets figured out though.

I wonder how long it takes Jason to figure out that this Jordan fellow is related to Vlad. 😂

I also wonder what it would take for Vlad to actually use his ghost form outright, what kind of threat he'd expose himself to for the sake of his family. Just, shoving the kids at Jack - "Darling your aim is iced tea, let Maddie and myself handle this" - and doing what he has to.

And, yes, even as a Mafia boss he refuses to actually swear. Also, he probably still goes by Plasmius, the way his other form looks does NOT help the vampire rumors. Let alone the- well, I read a post on here a while ago where Ellie Danny and Jordan were deaged and needed his ectoplasm to survive. Imagine being a Plasmius goon in a meeting while he's trying to rock his baby to sleep and she's just sucking on his hand. You don't think much of it until you see he's bleeding and, even though it's technically red, your pretty sure it's glowing green and you're not sure if you want to ask (you won't but still). Plus, he's not even reacting to what must be a fair bit of pain, right?

Honestly, there's probably a betting pool about the whole weird family.

And of course I'm bringing in my Alfred Clockwork storyline. Flashpoint Thomas is Frighty, dead Thomas is Pariah, and Gotham is Martha. The moment Vlad finds out that Jason's grandparents are some of the most powerful ghosts in the realms (or at least this side of them in Gotham's case) he's like "okay I won't interfere, but maybe he'd like a friend? He doesn't seem to know a lot of ghosts.' (he tries to figure out which kid would be a better fit and that's when he finds out Jordan's been working for Hood this whole time. "You didn't tell me?" "You didn't know?!") 😂

Basically, give me a Mafia family who's major story plot isn't even the bats outright, it's just trying to survive after fleeing a world that may as well be destroyed at this point. Sure, they interact with the bats, cross paths, maybe even a couple relationships, but, overall, the Fenton-Masters are just outsiders in Gotham, learning to adjust to this new life.

#Fenton-Masters Mafia Crossover #Fenton-Masters Mafia AU #Fenton-Masters Mafia Family #dpxdc #dpxdc crossover #dpxdc au #dimensional travel #new life

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lovelyyandereaddictionpoint · 10 months

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So I was re-reading your twst pool party fic (one of my favourite fics of all time. I literally read that at least once a week because I love it so much) and I was wondering if you could write Jamil and Kalim's reactions if it was just a Scarabia pool party and fem!reader (who they are not dating) is getting a lot of attention from their dorm mates after revealing her swimsuit when it gets wet?

Or maybe the same idea but the Savanaclaw trio when fem!reader comes to the Savanaclaw pools?

Scarabia's Private Pool Party | Yandere Twisted Wonderland

This has to be another one of Kalim’s spontaneous parties, inviting his obsession crush is a given. And for once Jamil isn’t at all protesting as he usually would. Both are thrilled to be able to witness the unknown treasure that is you in a wet oversized shirt:

Kalim Al Asim

“..Kalim? Can you please stop staring…”

“But you’re so pretty! How can I stop?”

He doesn’t realize anyone’s looking but him

But if everyone’s staring at you it won’t be fun anymore

So maybe making some waves in the pool to shake everyone everyone back into the party spirit

And splashing the ones who just keep staring

Yay! Now he’s the only one

How can he blame them you’re just so gorgeous!

Jamil Viper

“You’re a disaster (Y/n).”

“What, why?”

“You don’t even know how gorgeous you can be distracting you can be.”

“Ah!”

He’s hypnotizing everyone into either hurting themselves or snapping their heads away

He’s not even bothering to hide it

And he’s more than willing to push you in the pool

And keep your submerged body against his in the water

If they still didn’t get the memo

He doesn’t mind following it up with scorpions in their bed

Too bad if they die

#yandere scarabia #yandere kalim al asim #yandere kalim x reader #yandere kalim #yandere jamil viper #yandere jamil x reader #yandere jamil #yandere x reader #yandere x you #lovelyyandereaddictionpoint #yanderexrea #yandere #yandere twisted wonderland #yandere twst #yandere twst x reader

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welcometothejianghu · 26 days

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Welcome to another round of W2 Tells You What You Should See, where W2 (me) tries to sell you (you) on something you should be watching. Today's choice: 重啟之極海聽雷/Reunion: The Sound of the Providence/The Lost Tomb Reboot/this thing has too many names

Reunion (I'm just going to call it that) is a 2020 action drama about the most specialest little babygirl in the tomb-raiding world, his two husbands, and the cadre of assorted weirdos they pick up as they try to follow a set of directions left by a dead (?) man in the thunder.

Imagine if someone showed you the Mandalorian, and you were like, gee, that was a neat little sci-fi one-shot! because you'd never heard of Star Wars. That was basically my experience watching this show, having no idea that the Lost Tomb franchise (DMBJ) was even a thing. Turns out that not only is there a whole big continuity out there with these characters, but that Reunion takes place a few years after the main story's resolution. Don't worry, though -- Reunion doesn't spoil you for that resolution. It doesn't spoil you for much, period. Look, DMBJ has a weird relationship to endings, okay?

I have written a more thorough where-to-start guide for DMBJ as a whole, so if you want to consider other entry points, well, that information is there for your consideration. Yet it is my opinion that this is the best entry into the overall franchise, and a fun thing to watch just in general, and I'm here to make my case for both of those.

The rest of this rec will assume that you have no familiarity with the DMBJ series. That's okay; you don't need any. All you need is to trust my five reasons you should watch this.

1. Old Man Yaoi

As you begin this show, you are introduced to the Iron Triangle. That's them in the picture up there. Left to right, you have: Xiao Ge, magically tattooed immortal hottie who just got back from ten years in [scene missing]; Wu Xie, our protagonist, who's just a little guy and it's his birthday; and Wang Pangzi, the literal best.

(And yes, Wu Xie is in his 30s and Pangzi is in his 40s, which is not technically old man anything, but ... look, if you watch, you'll see why I think I'm justified in calling it that.)

They are extremely married. They are a disaster trio of disasters so disastrous that no one else should ever be subjected to their chaos. They're going to make sure lots of people are, though, don't you worry about it. Sometimes those people even deserve it.

However, because the show (tragically!!) decides that Xiao Ge has somewhere else to be like 95% of the runtime, most of the relationship you get to see is between Wu Xie and Pangzi.

I'm saying this now as an old gay nerd who just this year celebrated her 15th wedding anniversary: I have never, never felt so represented in media as I have watching Wu Xie and Pangzi interact. There's a little wake-up song they sing together near the end of the show, and it just ... it packs so much character development into thirty seconds. These boys have been living adjacent lives for so long that they've made up their own little shared songs about the mundanities of daily living. That is just what happens when you marry your best friend and then decide to get old and weird together. Ask me how I know.

Look, if you want to know whether this show is for you or not, watch to the end of the first episode, to the part where Pangzi flips over the table. If your heart is filled with joy (as it should be), keep going.

Love makes a tomb-raiding syndicate family.

2. A fun-filled action-packed romp of nonsense!

If you're familiar with Hellblazer canon, this will make sense to you: Reunion is Dangerous Habits. If you're not familiar with Hellblazer canon, try it like this: Reunion is a terrible place to start because it plays on your extant affection for a character who gains a terrible status effect almost immediately. It's a also great place to start because it throws you right in the action with measurably high stakes and gives you a reason to build that affection very quickly.

I'm also going to warn you right off the bat: The plot of this show got cut to ribbons by censors.

See, the DMBJ books, being books, are allowed to get away with supernatural shit! So you've got zombies and ghosts and curses and monsters and immortality and all your other standard ooky spooky semi-urban fantasy trappings. But the DMBJ adaptations, being live-action, are heavily regulated in their content. This is why, in the early Reunion episodes, our heroes are menaced by human-looking creatures that are actually ancient mannequins made of leather that are piloted, mecha-style, by evil clams. Because evil clams are more scientific than zombies. I guess.

So yeah, the plot of this book already had to get mangled into a more "science"-compliant shape even before it made it to filming. The real problem is that a whole lot more of it got cut after it was all filmed and put together. I have read an explanation of what the actual storyline was supposed to be, and yeah, if you know what you’re looking at, you can see (and hear) the scars where major elements got hacked out with a weed whacker.

Therefore: You cannot expect this plot to make sense.

But that's okay! You're not here for the plot to make sense! You're here to watch some characters you love run around through ridiculous and sometimes beautiful labyrinths, trying to solve puzzles you're never given enough information to understand, all in search of the resolution to a mystery that had half its guts torn out before you got to see it -- and you are here to love it. If you have ever laughed and cheered your way through a Mission: Impossible film without pausing to care too much about the plot holes it’s dodging left and right, you are in the correct frame of mind to appreciate this. Just believe that whatever engaging nonsense the show tells you is correct for the time being and go with it.

You cannot watch DMBJ and care about the laws of physics. You simply cannot.

Do not, however, let me give you the impression that the shoddy plotting is accompanied by equally shoddy performances. A major part of this show’s incredible watchability comes from how the cast is shockingly good. There are some serious heavy hitters among the actors. A major part of why this Wu Xie and Pangzi are my favorite together is the incredible chops both Zhu Yilong and Chen Minghao have, to say nothing of their real-life affection for one another. (See that scar on Wu Xie's neck? That scar is there because Zhu Yilong commits to the bit.) Effortlessly charming Mao Xiaotong turns potentially irritating wunderkind Bai Haotian into a perfect precious weirdo baby. Wu Erbai's entire second-season character arc could have been unintentionally comedic, but veteran of queer cinema Hu Jun sells even the undignified moments as relentlessly tragic. And of course Baron Chen absolutely kills it with...

3. This giant fucking loser

This is Hei Xiazi. That's not his name, but it's close enough. Allow me to do a dramatic reenactment of my watching his first scene:

[camera pans over to him]

me: Ugh, I recognize this kind of wannabe badass character design. I hate his type. He's self-important, hyper-masculine, and just a big jerk, and the show thinks he's soooo cool. Barf.

[thirty seconds later]

me: Oh no. I was so wrong. I love him forever now.

This is because he is (as indicated above) a giant fucking loser. Yes, he's a good fighter who knows lots of things. He's also a wet potato chip of a man. Sure, he can get you into a headlock, but he can also annoy you into submission, and that's honestly more fun for him. My wife has used the phrase “Vash the Stampede-coded” to describe him. My wife is not wrong.

And the kind of ridiculous thing is, being such a loser is what wraps back around to making him cool again. He's a loser because he just doesn't fucking care. His masculinity is the opposite of fragile. You tell him to wear a dress and makeup, he'll do it -- and sure, he'll complain, but only because he enjoys complaining. He has no dignity. He’s tits-out. He's gender. He's the worst and also the best.

Hei Xiazi is a major character in the other installations, to the point where he and his boyfriend (more on him later) even have their own movie. But of course, I did not know this on my first watch, so I kept expecting the show to explain his whole deal. It does not, but you don't really need it to. He sees better in the dark. He doesn't age. He's a thug for hire. There, that's all the bio you need.

One of the things that makes him great is that he is the least sexually threatening person ever. Across all the properties he's in, he spends a fair amount of time with women -- sometimes in very close quarters -- and they are perfectly safe around him. I actually wrote a whole post about it once upon a time (warning for tiny spoilers for a series that isn't this one) wherein I claim that not only Xiazi but Reunion in general is the television equivalent of the shirt that says I RESPECT WOMEN SO MUCH I DON'T HAVE SEX WITH THEM.

That said, this loser does get a sort-of romance plot here -- and honestly, I find it very cute! It's not even the only instance in this series of a bisexual guy in a long-term same-sex relationship getting a girlfriend, and I like that other one too! Look, the handle of my DMBJ sideblog is @katamaricule because I joked that Wu Xie treats polyamory like a katamari, and if you don't move fast enough, you're going to be rolled right up into his gay little cuddle puddle.

This is not a show for exclusive ships; this is a show for inclusive ships. The Jiumen Association is a polycule. You don't even have to know what the Jiumen Association is to know it's true.

4. The power of friendship

This show has a lot of characters.

I'd say the supporting cast is divided into three categories: characters who have been in previous installments, characters who have not been in previous installments, and characters who probably should have been in previous installments (or at least mentioned) but who were only created for Reunion so we have to pretend like we've known about them all along.

There is no way to tell which is which -- which is part of my argument that this series makes a good entry point to the franchise.

Take Huo Daofu. Huo Daofu is a brilliant doctor masquerading as a donut stand operator who treats Wu Xie with all the cold disdain of a man confronting the person who left him at the altar years ago. On the one hand, yes! We do know Huo Daofu from a previous series, and we've known he's both a doctor and a bitch. On the other hand, oh, we have no idea why he's like this about Wu Xie, and we probably never will. The show just treats it like it's for an excellent reason, and you know what, from what you know about Wu Xie, it probably is.

Consider also Jiang Zisuan. One of the show's principal antagonists, Jiang Zisuan turns out to be the brother of ... well, let's just say it's someone whose having a brother really should have come up before this. It has not come up. (And that's even before we get into the issue of his surname.) His stated identity as that person's brother is so bizarre that my favorite interpretation is that he isn't actually that person's brother -- all the flashbacks we see are just his delusions about a relationship he's completely invented. But there's no way you'd know how fucking weird this is on your first run.

Then there's our friendly little support himbo, Kanjian, who shows up to all occasions with two tickets to the gun show and not a thought in that beautiful head. (His name just means "vest," which is par for the course when it comes to the author's naming conventions.) He was a lot more menacing in the last series (where they kept putting sleeves on him, geez), where most of what we learned about him is that you can loan him out to other tomb-raiding families. Now he's a golden retriever with great aim and a slingshot. It's an upgrade.

The trick is, you cannot be surprised when someone shows up and the show treats them like you should know who they are, even when there's no possible way you could know who they are. I mean, for heaven's sake, Liu Sang arrives in the middle of an obvious beef with Pangzi, the origins of which are never satisfactorily explained, while also having a giant do-I-want-to-fuck-him-or-do-I-want-to-be-him crush on Xiao Ge, which is also never satisfactorily explained. Whatever, you just roll with it. He's got good hearing, a bad attitude, and questionable taste in idols. Now you're good to go.

(I should throw in a special note here that Liu Sang is many, many people's little meow meow, and not undeservedly. For a fuller explanation of why that is, please consult this other post I made.)

Part of the fun of this big cast is the adorable interactions you get. All the characters have appropriately big personalities, and the show loves letting people you wouldn’t expect bounce off one another. It’s not your typical action-hero show where nothing happens without the protagonist in the room. There are lots of exciting combinations and tons of charming dynamics! Unlikely friendships form all over the place! Enemies become allies! Allies become friends! Friends become friends with other friends! Some friends become enemies again! You'll need a scoreboard to keep up!

This is not to say the show treats all its characters perfectly or equally -- one of the precious few main female characters doesn't even get a real name, for heaven's sake, and the less said about the brownface racism, the better. It is, at its heart, a dude show for dudes made in China, with all the troubling decision-making that implies. Where it does deserve credit, though, is in understanding that its supporting characters are actual people with personalities apart from their function in Wu Xie's narrative. Sometimes the show just asks "what if [random character A] and [random character B] had to interact?" and has fun considering the answer! Which is almost always a delight to watch, and sometimes even breaks your heart.

5. Amazing rewatch value!

And by this I mean the experience of watching this show is remarkably different once you have any understanding of the rest of the DMBJ universe.

For instance, there's a point where two characters are scuba-diving past some submerged coffins, and one character tells the other whose coffins they are. Working only on information Reunion has given you, you're like, oh, that's where they buried the guy who built this creepy place, that's a little weird. Once you recognize that name from other series, though, your reaction is far more, excuse me, they did WHAT to WHOSE corpses?

Or another point where a character you've already met is on a train, and there's a handsome gentleman who just happens to be riding with her. He hands her his business card! Aw, that's sweet, he seems like a nice guy! Well, no, Xie Yuchen is not nice, but he is one of our allies, and he's Hei Xiazi's boyfriend, and a lot of what he's doing hits real different when you have a fuller grasp on why he's doing it and for whom. (Honestly, a major reason to watch Reunion first is so you're not fully and appropriately upset by how your black/pink gays merely have one teeny tiny scene together.)

From the way the series treats the persistent absence of Wu Sanxing, Wu Xie's third uncle, I absolutely, 100% assumed that he was a completely new character to this installment of the series, an extremely long-lost relative that we've somehow conveniently managed to never talk about before now. So imagine my gobsmacked surprise when I went to watch a different series, set much earlier in the timeline, where the opening scene prominently features Wu Sanxing as an actual character in the present-day narrative! ...Well, sorta. Look, there's a lot of fuckery with his identity in earlier parts of the story, and fortunately you need to know none of it to understand Reunion. But when you do, it suddenly makes a lot more sense why Wu Xie talks about someone who was a major part of Wu Xie's adult life like he died when Wu Xie was nine.

AND THE FLASHBACK SCENE WHERE A-NING GETS KILLED BY THE SNAKE, AND YOU'RE LIKE, OKAY, AND THEN YOU WATCH ULTIMATE NOTE AND IT WASN'T LIKE THAT AT ALL look, I know there are kinda reasons for this, different production companies and all, but seriously, what the fuck

All of which to say is that the experience of watching Reunion the first time is, hey, this self-contained romp is a lot of fun! The experience of rewatching it after watching any of the other DMBJ installments is a transcendently wonderful head-clutching avalanche of one moment of recognition right after another.

And here's the thing: You will watch more. Reunion is a gateway drug. If you are interested enough to make it through all 62 episodes, you're going to be interested in watching more. Which is great. The English-speaking fandom needs more people. Come down into the tombs. It's great down here. We've got snakes and arguably unintentional homoeroticism. Join us. Join usssssssss

Are you ready for an aventure?

There are a couple different ways to watch the first half, but there's (weirdly) only one way to watch the second, so for both of them, I'm going to send you straight to iQiyi: Season 1 (32 episodes) and Season 2 (30 episodes).

And just so you’re ready when Reunion is done, here’s how you find the rest of the DMBJ series, in the absolutely non-chronological order in which I, personally, think you should watch them:

The Lost Tomb 2 (AsianCrush, YouTube)

Ultimate Note (iQiyi)

The Mystic Nine (iQiyi, Viki)

Sand Sea/Tomb of the Sea (Viki, WeTV, YouTube, also YouTube)

Also, there's a lot of movies and side series and other pieces that are worth seeing, and even a couple of full series I've left off the list, and you can just slot them in wherever. And maybe we'll get Tibetan Sea Flower someday? Look, hope springs eternal.

They're so perfect. Perfect triangle. Perfect boys.

#dmbj #重启 #重启之极海听雷 #盗墓笔记 #Reunion: The Sound of the Providence #the lost tomb reboot #rec post #i made this

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colourstreakgryffin · 9 months

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Can we get Muzan but he has twin male children, who in the Uppermoons eyes are way more threatening and terrifying then Muzan, the twins are very overprotective of Muzan when he isn’t looking, and Muzan believes that his boys are sweet and harmless, but the twins are always killing anything and everyone who even looks at their father the wrong way

Another Papa Muzan scenario! After I just made one, it’s okay though! Let’s do another Papa Muzan!

Kibutsuji Muzan- Trio of Disaster

Muzan loves his twin sons to death and he will happily murder anybody, demon or human, who dare to try insult nor suppress his children. They are just as high power as Muzan and their privileges may or may not twist their point of view into believing they are unstoppable with how much Muzan spoiled them

Muzan isn’t aware of how his Upper Moons are more terrified of his sons then him. He wouldn’t be upset if so, he’d be relieved that his sons are becoming so much like their father and he would encourage them to continue maintaining their image. Muzan feels pride for his princes of the demons

Muzan is overprotective towards his twins, and that passionate treatment is traded back on the twins’ behalf. They hiss and bark at anybody who merely looks at their father, and that includes striking at Tanjiro when he first comes across Muzan. The twins value their father too much to let him be tainted, even in the slightest

Muzan isn’t aware of how the twins attack demons and humans he speaks to, behind his back. As much as he loves his sons, he isn’t really aware of how they really are like. He simply believes they are angels, unable to do anything wrong but they are truly as rotten as him

Muzan will argue hysterically with his Upper Moons over his sons. Proclaiming they are innocent and pure, as they always are with their father. As they torture Gyokko and Hantengu for daring to breath in their father’s direction wrong. The twins are rather cruel and evil but their intentions are centred around their father

Muzan loves taking his sons out to everywhere he goes. To Shibuya, to Tokyo, to the nearby River, to the Ubuyashiki household. Muzan will never leave his sons out and he constantly has them right besides him. He just can’t stand being away from his lovely sons

Muzan is very attached to his lovely twins. He has had them for so long, he can’t even express how much he adores them. Sure, he adopted them when he turned them into demons to save their lives for his selfish gain but that original reason has converted into a real fatherly love

Muzan likes buying presents for his twins. Even if he has to get his claws dirty to get them, he always comes back with lots of gifts for his sons and this kinda enables their entitled, aggressive nature. Muzan could care less, he loves his sons and he doesn’t bat a eye at the remarks he gets over them being unnecessarily cruel to everybody

Muzan will never bring his twins into a mission nor fight, under any circumstance. The final battle including him, he hides them away and proclaims his love for them is infinite. Sure, when he doesn’t come back, the twins are distraught and cry for days over their father’s defeat but they know they must carry on the legacy

“Boys. Come here, give Father a hug… this is sadly a serious situation but I need you two to run away. Hide, avoid the slayers as much as possible. They will come after you, and I love you two too much to let them hurt you. For Father, save yourselves”

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