Tumgik
#the more unfitting the better
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A mage Whumpee who’s still learning to control their magic powers and not overexert themselves, but one day they get cocky while trying to prove themselves for some really stupid reason and pass out as a consequence, much to the concern of caretaker who knows like nothing about magic and it’s side effects
Caretaker rushing to Whumpee’s side, praying that they’re not dead, and feeling so relieved when they feel Whumpee’s pulse still going - Weak, but still going.
They gently prop them up on their lap when they notice Whumpee slowly regaining consciousness, almost crying in relief when Whumpee’s eyes flutter open.
“Whumpee? Whumpee, hey, can you hear me? What the hell was that?”
And Whumpee, still dazed and not fully there, focuses on Caretaker for a moment, before pulling the corner of their mouth up into a half grin.
“Guess you could say that was a...dizzy spell,” before closing their eyes again from exhaustion.
How Caretaker reacts is up to you.
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mizuena-dreams · 8 months
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I doubt this was colopale’s actual intent but like,,, Kanade always reads as someone who has chronic fatigue, to the point I forget she isn’t actually disabled -
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guckies · 1 month
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Hot take I agree with Foolish I don’t like Clove’s outfit either ✋🫥🤚
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perenlop · 1 year
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so dont get me wrong, “iris and the rogue dragonite” is a really, REALLY good episode. it does wonders for iris’s development and shows that she’s more in tune with her dragon powers, and she gets a new member on her team that’s finally a new dragon type. but i’m sorry, the episode and iris’s overall team would have worked so so much better if it was a hydreigon instead of a dragonite. im willing to die on this hill
#in fact id go as far as saying that they originally planned this arc to have a hydreigon#because dragonite's behavior is more akin to a hydreigon's and fits the ''there are no bad dragon types'' message a lot better#and they only mention ''oh its a scary dragonite'' like once to set it apart. like ik pokemon are individuals#but dragonite up to this point have been shown to be pacifists unless something theycare about is threatened#so the public generally reveres them. and yeah this is just one dragonite and its different#but the novelty wears off in the first episode for me and i cant really take it that seriously bc dragonite is so doofy looking#clairs dragonite in johto was terrifying bc we saw it as a sweet pacifist and THEN it went on a rampage to show its sheer power#when something it loved was threatened#this one just doesnt have that same effect on me. ik it did on other ppl but as a kid i was just like ''this doesnt feel like it should be a#a dragonite''#''rogue dragon thats territorial and fights everything in sight for power and everyone fears it and refuses to believe it could be good''#is something that fits hydreigon WAYYYYYYY way better. and the follow disobedience arc as well#like game iris had a hydreigon at this point and hydreigon is actually native to unova and fitting for her and its own arc#and ghetsis doesnt even have hydreigon in the anime so like what was the hold up??? was it bc cameron had one??#bc he literally just sucks and if thats why then that absolutely blows#like it feels like its only a dragonite bc ''oh thats kanto and genwunners are mad that theres less kanto so throw it in''#and to have advertsing like ''WAAAAAAA we are getting DRAGONITE vs CHARIZARD????#bc i remember that being literally everywhere lol#im sorry i like dragonite as a pokemon its really cute and ive used one before. its a good pokemon#but its so unfitting for this arc and its always bothered me so much#and rewatching it only reinforced those feelings. also i just like hydreigon better lol sorry#echoed voice#pokeani lb
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wazzuppy · 2 years
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god i really hate to bring this up, especially with all the excitement and joy about volume 9 coming soon and all, but, as someone who's only very recently gotten into rwby, i feel like a lot of rwby fans are very,,,,, aggressive? towards any sort of criticism of the show?? which like, i get, rwby and its community has been the target of a lot of incredibly awful and unwarranted hate for YEARS. but, even when it's critique from other fans of the show-- people who genuinely like and enjoy it-- it seems theyre VERY quick to turn on them for even the littlest things. and again, im someone who LIKES rwby and WANTS to be apart of the larger fandom, but its just very,,, intimidating to think that i'll be attacked on both sides for enjoying it and also recognizing faults.
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this-is-a-url · 2 years
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If y'all think I'm throwing out aus left and right today, just you fucking wait until I finally draw for the one based off of mlp
#basically the tallest grow perpetually (which is my regular hc anyways) but the more they grow the more they crumble#this feature is not genetically modified out bc it makes it so successful invaders can't outgrow the tallest#or really just anybody in general#however Red and Purple seem to be crumbling without their bodies naturally stabilizing it#all the robotic enhancements seem to make things worse too#eventually Purple crumbles to near fucking death due to Red's own hand#Red goes fucking feral (out of a mix of protectiveness‚ fear‚ and love)#but medics won't really help him unless Red is actually breathing downtheir fucking necks#They're viewing Purple as unfit to rule and as a lost cause (+ in their mind they always had a spare in Red anyways)#and would rather him die. They see one tallest as better than one tallest and a defective taller#So the weaker Purple gets the more feral Red gets#After killing most every irken for their incompetence and definitely every crew member he finds#Red eventually takes off with Purple to find the one irken he's never seen with any holes or crumbles#not a single imperfection visible in any of the thousands of INFURIATING video message Zim has sent them since his unknowing exile#meanwhile Zim his struggling on Earth#he's starting to. actually befriend Did despite them still hating eachother‚#the message ''no recopient found'' comes up when he tries to call the tallest‚#and worst of all‚ he finds that he can't stay in one spot for too long or else his body starts to caccon itself#and the more he hangs out with Dib‚ the quicker his body's cacconing attempts seem to be#I like the mlp changelings so much y'all#my little invader au
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I'm SO TIRED the FUCK
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rileyslibrary · 10 months
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pretty pretty please 🩶
imagine ghost is forced to speak at a school’s career fair because he’s out on medical, and reader gets sent with him to chaperone. (i.e. make sure he doesn’t scare any kids to 💀. and also maybe to feed him some slightly manipulative praises so he stays in a good mood lmao)
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You’re both standing in the principal’s office. The school was kind enough to offer you a private room since kids are a little rowdy today, and Ghost isn’t very fond of tiny hands tagging at his uniform and asking him “how many people he has killed”.
You’re holding two balaclavas; one is black, while the other is a deep shade of army green.
“It’s either this one or that one.” You say while raising both to his eye level.
He pushes your hands down and points to his skull mask. “No.” He states. “I’ll stick with the one I’m wearing.”
You frustratedly shake the balaclavas to your sides. “Come on, Lieutenant,” you plead, “you’ll scare the kids.”
“Have you seen kids these days?” he asks, raising his hands. “These fuckers are not afraid of anything!”
“Oh god,” You wince and toss the balaclavas on the principal’s desk. You shake your index finger at his face like a teacher disciplining a misbehaving student. “Don’t you dare to swear in front of them!”
“Have you heard, kids—”
“—these days.” You cut him off with a flick of the wrist. “Yes, but there’s no need to reinforce bad behaviour.”
He lets out a long exhale and places his hands on his waist. He begins pacing around the principal’s office, swearing under his breath. You’re trying to figure out whether he needs to let it all out before his big speech or if he’s cursing the moment he has agreed to do this.
He pauses in front of a painting hanging next to a window overlooking the school’s playground. He slouches and places one hand on his lower back, rubbing his injury.
You approach him from behind and gently grasp his forearm.
“Hey,” you whisper, “what’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” he replies sternly. “Never mind.”
“Are you in pain? Please talk to me.”
“I’m not in pain!” He protests. “In fact, I wasn’t in pain to begin with, when the medics decided that I was,” he makes air quotes with his fingers, “temporarily unfit for duty.”
You place a palm on his lower back and begin rubbing it. He relaxes at your touch and puts one hand on the wall to support his weight.
“You talk about not reinforcing bad behaviour,” he murmurs, “but I’m not the best role model either.”
“Bullshit!” You scowl.
“Seriously,” he insists, “I highly doubt I’d be here talking to kids about their future if I hadn’t been injured.”
He’s correct, but he doesn’t need to know that, especially now, as you wait to enter a classroom full of kids. Any other team member would be far more qualified for this role. Gaz is such a cool guy that most kids would deem him a god. Price feels like the father you wish you had when he talks, and Soap can adapt to anyone he speaks to. Even you would be a better fit for this year’s career fair. But, Ghost? No, not at all.
“Come on, Simon,” you say as you continue rubbing his back. “It’s less about ‘being a role model’ and more about relating to them.”
“How am I supposed to relate to them?” He wonders, “My childhood was nothing like theirs.”
“How do you know?”
He looks at you and motions towards the window. “Look at them,” he says, “they’re full of life.”
“Not all of them are like that, Ghost; some are putting on a show.” You explain, and he turns to look at you again. “They look all jolly, but they might struggle at home or school. Worse, they can’t admit what’s happening behind closed doors because they’re either ordered to remain silent or not understand it themselves.”
He huffs and shakes his head. “Now I can relate to that.” He murmurs.
“See? You need to spot these kids and indirectly talk to them.”
“Spot?” He asks. “How do I spot them?”
“You mean to tell me you’re trained to spot targets from miles away but can’t see when a child suffers in silence?” You ask back. “Plus, it takes one to know one.”
He nods. “And what should I communicate to these kids?” He asks. “How do I help them?”
“By showing them that there’s something better waiting for them out there.”
“Don’t be naive, Y/N. How is what we do better than what they’re going through right now?”
“It’s not about the military, Simon.” You elaborate. “It’s about giving them another chance. They deserve to know there are options other than turning into their drug-addicted mother or alcoholic father.” You lean forward so he can meet your gaze. “Someone gave you a second chance, right?”
He closes his eyes and ponders your words. You tilt your head at him, trying to predict what he’ll say next so you can respond quickly.
But he doesn’t say anything. Instead, he straightens up and takes a deep breath. “You know,” he begins, “I gave one of those speeches to a school a few years ago.”
“Oh!” You cheer and pat him on the back twice. “Did you, now?”
“Lysychansk, Ukraine.” He recalls, “I was being held hostage with a bunch of kids.”
“Tell me more about it,” you say, sitting on the principal’s desk and playing with a pink highlighter. He begins narrating his story, and you can tell he’s becoming more confident as he realises he’s spoken to children before, albeit in a very different context, but who cares? What matters is that he is becoming more at ease with his “previous experience.”
You, in turn, try to give him your full attention, but now that his doubts have subsided, your primary concern is that mask of his. He needs to take it off.
“See? You’re far more experienced than any of us!” you shout. “And in that setting? My god! None of us would have been able to do such a thing!”
He chuckles and looks proudly out the window at the children playing in the school’s playground. He seems to be looking forward to it now.
“Hey, um, sir?”
He shifts his focus to you.
“Your mask, sir; It’s dirty,” you say as you point to his cheek.
He puts his hands on his mask. “Where?” He yells.
“It’s right….” You get up from the desk and take a step closer to him, inspecting his mask. You raise the marker and draw a bright pink line across his cheek, “...there.”
He immediately places his hand on his cheek, looks at the highlighter in your hand, and then back at you.
“You... motherfucker...” he murmurs.
You move away from him and stand behind the desk.
“I’m sorry, sir, but I can’t let you go out with that mask on; the parents will be furious.” You point to the balaclavas on the principal’s desk. “You do, however, have two other options! Take your pick, and I’ll see you in class in 5 minutes!” And with that, you rush out of the principal’s office and into the school’s corridor.
You enter the classroom and greet the kids with a smile, trying to hide your nervousness. Walking towards the back where the parents are seated, your mind starts racing; Is he trying to choose a mask, or is he cleaning up your mess? What if he’s so furious that he doesn’t show up, leaving you to give the speech? Worse, what if he enters the classroom and takes his anger out on you?
But, the door opens, and Ghost walks in. Your eyes widen, and your jaw drops. He’s not wearing any mask. Not the black one, not the green one, not the skull—with the pink streak—mask on. Nothing.
You observe him moving around; despite his lack of disguise, he maintains his composure. He greets everyone in the room, smiles, waves back at the kids and stands next to the teacher. You let out a relieved exhale through pierced lips. This is going well, thank god.
As the teacher introduces Ghost to the class, you turn to give him a thumbs up, and his eyes lock with yours. There’s a faint smirk playing on his lips, and your heart skips a beat as he silently mouths something in your direction: “You’ll pay for this.”
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A/N: YOU’LL PAY FOR THIS, ANON! I was forcing myself to take a break from writing, only to be slapped by an inspiration wave. Hope you liked it, though; I had fun making it.
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fanficgirl429 · 6 months
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Being there for Mike
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Prompt: Your boyfriend, Mike receives a notice that his Aunt Jane wants custody of Abby. You're there to comfort and support him.
Pairing: Mike Schmidt x Reader
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The slam of your front door pulls you from your sleep and you slowly open your eyes to see your boyfriend staring down at you. He’s wearing his favorite dark jeans, a gray shirt, and his signature black jacket. His short hair has a slight curl in it and stubble is covering his face. To say he looked attractive was an understatement. 
“Hey,” he says, shrugging off his jacket and hanging it on the hooks next to the front door. 
“Hi babe.”
He walks over to the couch, where you're currently laying and gently taps your foot. You lift your feet up, making room for him on the couch. He sits down and then pulls your legs on top of his, giving them a gentle squeeze. Mike was not an affectant person by any means but there were little gestures that he would do that would make your heart skip a beat. 
It was then that you noticed how defeated and tired he looked. It looked as if he hadn’t slept at all last night. 
“Are you ok?’ you ask, concern in your voice. 
Mike raises his hips from the couch and pulls out a large rolled up envelope from his back pocket. Without saying a word, he reaches across the couch and hands it to you. You give him a questioning look but he doesn’t say a word. Whatever is in here, has caused him major concern. 
The envelope is filled with yellow paper, creating a small booklet. The very first page says everything you need to know. 
“What the fuck?” you say, outraged. “What makes her think that she can get custody of Abby?” You skim through all of the paper but there is a lot of information. Hopefully he was able to make more sense of it. 
Mike lets out a sigh as you hand him back the paper and envelope. “She only wants Abby for money from the state.”
You move across the couch and sit down next to your boyfriend. He wraps his arm around your shoulder and you lean against his chest, wrapping your arm around his waist. 
He instantly relaxes and his breathing becomes more steady. When it came to his younger sister, Abby, he would easily get worked up. He wanted nothing but the best for her. 
“Whatever you need me to do, I will,” you reassure him. 
“Come with me to the meeting tomorrow,” he says. 
You nod and hug him tighter. 
——
Mike's Aunt Jane has it out for him. She is carrying on about how Mike is unfit to care for Abby and how she will do a better job. She even goes a far as saying that he is nodding out at the meeting. 
He barely slept at all last night. You could feel him tossing and turning most of the night before getting out of bed around 5am. As you laid in bed this morning, you could hear him pacing back and forth in the living room. 
His leg moves up and down while he sits and listens to her talk. You reach over to grab his hand, lacing your fingers with his. He squeezes your hand as Abby’s guidance counselor glances over at the two of you. She gives you a small smile before returning her eyes to Jane. 
When Jane is finally finished rambling, the guidance counselor concludes the meeting, telling Jane that she will be in touch. 
You and Mike thank the counselor for the meeting and you stand up and follow him out of the door into the front office. You make to turn left towards the school's front door but Mike turns right and begins to walk down the school's hallway. He stops for a moment and waits for you to catch up. His fingers lace with yours as he comes to a stop outside a classroom. He peaks through the window before opening the door, revealing an empty classroom. 
“This is Abby’s classroom,” he tells you, walking over the window. 
The large window overlooks the playground and you see Abby sitting at the picnic table drawing while the other kids are playing all around her. 
“She never plays with the other kids,” Mike comments with a sadness in his voice. 
You shrug. “She seems to be doing ok,” you reassure him. “If she wanted to play with the others she would. She’s told me about some friends she has here.” 
The door to the classroom opens and Abby’s guidance counselor walks in. She smiles as she walks over to the two of you. 
“I was wondering if I would find you here,” she says. 
She follows your gaze out the window and looks at Abby. 
“You’re doing a good job, you know?” she tells Mike. 
“Thanks,” Mike says, running his fingers through his hair. 
“How are you doing Mike?” she asks. 
Mike shrugs. “I’m ok,” he tells her. 
“We’re going to do whatever we can to make sure that Abby stays with you, you know that right? Have you found a job yet?”
“Not yet. But I’m working on it.”
“That’s step number one.”
The counselor squeezes Mike's shoulder before turning to leave the room.  
“Ready to go?” you ask him and he nods. 
He leads you out the door and down the hallway towards the front of the school. 
~~~
Mike closes the door to Abby’s room and walks into the living room. His gray sweatpants hang loose off his hips and his black t shirt shows off his frame. A blush forms on your cheeks and you turn away not wanting Mike to see. 
Although the two of you had been dating for almost two years now, Mike still made you blush. What had started out as a stupid crush years earlier, had turned into the best thing that had ever happened to you. You loved Mike and couldn’t imagine your life without him. 
Mike notices how your cheeks turned a slight shade of red but didn’t say anything. He didn’t want to call you out and embarrass you. Instead he walks over to where you are sitting on the couch and stands in front of you. He reaches his hand out and you place your hand in his. He gently pulls you up and wraps his around your waist, giving you a tight hug. You pull him against you, not wanting him to let go anytime soon. Hugs from Mike were your favorite thing. 
“Thanks for coming with me today,” he says. 
“Of course. You know I’m always here for you and Abby.” 
“I guess I need to start looking for a job.”
You nod. “Yea. And maybe try not to get fired,” you tease him. 
He shakes his head but a smile crosses his lips. He has a hard time getting mad at you. You might pick on him but it was always in good fun- every now and then he would tease you as well. 
“I hate you,” he teases. 
You let out a loud laugh and then instantly cover your mouth, forgetting that Abby was asleep. “You actually love me,” you say, looking up at him.
“I might,” he says, laughing.
He leans down and presses his lips against yours, kissing you slowly. 
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myfandomprompts · 7 months
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Unhealthy Addiction
(drugdealer!Aemond x Reader)
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Synopsis: Your sister is a drug addict, at the mercy of a dreaded drug dealer group led by a mysterious man. When you decide to save your sister from this life that kills her, you didn’t expect to build a whole other addiction to a perfect stranger.
A/N: Just some illogical & weird moderndark!Aemond smut in the October mood.
Words: 5.6k Masterlist
Warnings: dirty talk, dom, oral , vaginal, fingering, manipulation, possessive, begging, light bdsm, slight mention of drugs, praising
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Your sister was at her lowest.
She kept screaming at you, scaring the neighbours, alarming the entire street when she went into one of her tantrums and you didn’t know what to do. She was hurting, a pain that only something chemical could ease and you refused to indulge her. This was all she had in mind, getting that fix, and she didn’t mind doing the most violent things, saying the cruellest things to you in order to plead her case.
She kept screaming how she could not be done, how she bought all the drugs from this scary guy, that he convinced her to sell for him. That she couldn’t refuse.
She had no control over herself anymore, but you didn't back down, you had to get her clean.
So you decided that you would take care of it for her. 
You made her tell you where she got it from, a shady little place on Silk Street with shady people going around all day and night with business even the police didn’t even dare looking into as you forced her down to the ER. If it was the last link that tied her to this life and her addiction, you would cut it, and, as she dozed off in her hospital bed, you rushed to her flat in apprehension, grabbing the bag full of those terrifying substances and heading down to Silk Street.
You knew it was a bad idea, but you knew you had to do it. You just had to give the bag back, explain to them that your sister wanted nothing to do with them anymore, pay up whatever amount was necessary to make them forget about her and leave.
How naive you were.
You knock on the scruffy-looking door with a trembling hand, the chilly night already settling around you as dogs barked in the distance. 
The door creaks open, dim light filtering through a slim screen of smoke that comes out of the  messy room. The few people inside look concerningly calm, the soothing electronic music making their head bob inconsistently as the smell of weed slowly reaches you and tickles your nose.
“What?” the huge man at the door says in a flat tone, tattoos on his face but alert eyes strained on you.
“I… have stuff to give back to you,” you courageously state, staring back at him with all the fierceness you could muster and only earning an unimpressed look.
You owed it to your sister, you could do it.
He gauges your appearance mercilessly, unfit for this place and only when you take out the heavy plastic bag out of your purse does he nod silently and step aside to let you in. 
You retain a cough, the scent of smoke becoming much stronger as you enter and making your eyes sting. Several pairs of eyes which weren’t hooded and gazing into the void looked lazily at you, eyes so dark there was no more colour in them, swallowed by the blackness of their centre. Two or three men stared at you like they would jump at you at the first false movement while the few women present were half laying on the couches, mouth open in what looked like delight, but you knew better.
A chill goes up your spine, hearing the door close behind you in a sharp snap while you feel the air shift around you.
You did not belong here.
“Who are you?”
The man came out of nowhere, brown skin and brown eyes, luxurious dark hair falling to the side of his face and all dressed in white with a heavy chain hanging around his neck. He scrutinises you, looking you up and down with a judgmental frown.
“It doesn’t matter,” you state after a difficult swallow. “I’m here to return this.”
The man eyes the bag you extend to him, a flash of recognition passing through his features but he doesn’t take it, rather deepening his frown. “Where did you get this?”
You bite your lips, growing uneasy under his gaze. All that you wanted was to leave this place as quickly as possible, even if you had to lie to achieve that. “Maria doesn’t want to do this anymore, and we don’t want any problems. So I’m doing the right thing, and returning it to you.”
The man sneers, an amused smile dancing on his lips and you tense. “Yeah, I’m afraid it doesn’t work like that, sweetheart. You’re her sister, aren’t you?”
You don’t have time to answer as the man at the door approaches him with a serious look on his face, ignoring you. “Cole, the boss is back.” 
“Perfect timing, he’ll want to see this,” the man named Cole answers without taking his eyes off you. “You’re coming with me, sweetheart. We’ll sort this out, don’t worry.”
You could feel it, the trap closing in on you as he takes the bag from your hands and turns away for you to follow him. “I just want to give you this and leave. Please.”
He gives you an uninterested look over his shoulder, shrugging. “It’s not up to me.”
You shiver as panic starts to fill your nerves, the desire to flee, to run becoming stronger but you make the sensible choice and do as you’re told. 
He leads you into a cold-lighted room where the sole wide window is draped with a thick grey curtain and blocks your view of the humid night. The carpet floor is dirty, rendering you uncomfortable as you advance further into the room, chairs and stools stacked along the walls and an old looking desk standing at the opposite side. Even the huge couch below the window isn’t welcoming, the mess on the low table in front of it is filled with objects you don’t recognise.
You shouldn't be here.
Cole throws the bag on the table unceremoniously, the sound startling you as he commands you to wait. “Don’t touch anything.”
You try to settle your breathing, the room suffocating you as you realise that you are stuck, led there by a fool’s hope of coming to an understanding with these men, with dangerous people. You recall the frightened look on your sister’s face as she yelled at you, saying that she couldn’t fail them, couldn’t upset them.
Maybe you should have listened to her. Maybe you should have been scared too.
Muffled whispers filter through the door over the faint music, making you turn around with renewed anxiety as you recognise Cole’s voice. You know your time is running out, and you have no idea what’s going to happen. But then the door opens and you freeze.
It isn’t Cole, but someone much taller, leaner, terrifyingly attractive. 
He has long silver hair, silk cascading down over his shoulders that are wrapped around a dark green vest. He wears black trousers, matching with his tee-shirt that clings to his form and contrasts with his skin, fair and white. He effortlessly radiated an unsettling confidence, which you could feel even from a distance, making every muscle in your body tense, and you don’t know where to look. He hasn't even spoken yet.
His eyes are fixed on you, a perverted glow shining within them but you can’t meet it, too focused on the angular features of his face, on how flawless his marble skin and thin red lips look under the dim light. Everything about him is captivating, from his collarbone that peaks from under his shirt to the long scar that runs across his left cheek and further up his eye.
At this moment, you understood why your sister had been scared.
He stares at you for a while before finally smiling briefly in unconcealed satisfaction and closing the door. You don’t move, too stunned to utter a single word as he slowly walks towards the table to pick up the plastic bag and examine it closely, humming to himself. You watch, speechless, noticing the red marks over his knuckles, the bruises that stain his fist and you swallow the taste of iron in your mouth. 
The bag is carelessly dropped again as he reaches for a cigarette within his vest without a word, fingers enticingly coming to trap it between his lips and you’re hypnotised, desperate for him to acknowledge you, to say something. But then he flicks the lighter, casting an orange flame on the upper side of his face and you can’t help but gasp.
Unnoticed in the dim light, you can see it now, see how one of his eyes shimmers an icy blue, while the other one shone darker, deeper.
Blue as the night sky.
“You’re Maria’s sister?”
His voice makes you jump, his deep and velvety tone making the hair stand at the back of your neck and your heart race in your chest.
“Y-Yes,” you stammer, words coming out of your throat in strained sounds.  “Yes, I am.”
He nods, one corner of his lips curving upwards slightly as he takes a drag, making a thin curtain of smoke escape his sharp nose. “And you’re here because…?”
You manage to swallow the lump in your throat as he draws closer, intelligent eyes searching your features, making you hyper aware of how small you are compared to him. “I… just want to give the drugs back, so she can leave this part of her life behind. We won’t cause any trouble, I-I promise.”
He stops inches in front of you, his body going rigid as his eyes turn a shade of black, making you take a step back in reaction. “And what makes you think I can let that happen?”
You widen your eyes at the soft-spoken threat, freezing as you cower under his gaze.
He sees this. It makes him smile. 
“Relax, kitten. I'm not going to hurt you…” he says in the same unsettling tone as his blue eye lowers to the way your chest heaves under your shirt. “It’s just… not how we do things. When you take my stuff, you make a commitment, and you have to go all the way through with it or you get punished. There is no return policy.”
You could see it now, right beneath the scar, the gemstone shoved inside of his eye socket, as blue as the starless sky. It glowed softly, beautifully, and you were left to wonder how a man like him could be so dangerously pretty.
You urgently chase the thought away, slapping yourself internally as you feel yourself shrink under his gaze. “She can’t-,” you try uselessly, feeling the noose slowly constricting around your neck. “I understand, but I’ll pay for you to take it back. I beg of you, it represents almost nothing for you. Please…”
Something noticeably shifts in his eye at your last word, his nostrils flaring as he takes some time to compose himself before asking. “What’s your name?”
You hesitate, thrown off by the question and unable to come up with the simple answer and he grows impatient at your silence. He takes a firm step forward, making the back of your knee hit the chair behind you as the faint heat from the tip of his cigarette reaches your sides somewhere over the skin of your hand.
“What’s. Your. Name?” he repeats slowly, a hint of darkness in his voice.
“Y/N,” you finally blurt out, barely hearing your own voice as he claims your space like it’s his own, prowling.
His lips form silent syllables as he repeats your name to himself, finally satisfied. “And do you know mine, kitten?”
You silently shake your head, feeling excitement rise at the prospect of knowing, shameful eagerness taking hold of your mind, not thinking for a second that it might anger him.
But he only clicks his tongue in disapproval, watching you like you’re nothing more than a nuisance. “I’m Aemond, and if you had known that, kitten, you wouldn’t be here. Because everybody fucking knows I don’t take things back.”
Your nerves stir in renewed fright as his words ring like a death sentence in your ears. You have to find something, anything that would suit him, please him, but your mind draws a blank, the intensity of his gaze holding you in place. You remain silent as he takes a drag from his cigarette, not tearing his eye from you and when he suddenly turns away, it leaves a cold trail of chills along your spine.
You let out a quiet sigh of relief, your lungs burning from your previous lack of air as he wanders around the room.
“I take it you don’t use?” he says unexpectedly as he crushes his cigarette in the ashtray before taking the bag again on the table, drawing a round white pill out with his usual soft tone.
“No…” you answer weakly as he rolls the pill between his fingers, your eyes following the movement, transfixed.
“Mh… You’re one of those… The ones that don’t take wrong turns, the good girls.”
The stress that had settled between your ribs turns into something warmer at the calling, his tone inexplicably making the last ounce of courage you have left emerge. 
“If I didn’t take any wrong turns, I wouldn't have ended up here.”
He stills, his eye darting towards you like a single-eyed hawk and you bite your lips in instant regret, almost drawing blood as teeth sink into the thin flesh. His eye lowers to it and you instantly let go with a bashful expression.
He chuckles darkly, a devious smirk appearing on his features and you blink. “See, this is where you’re wrong. I don’t think you’ve realised the opportunity you just walked into… Y/N.”
You feel your stomach turn as reality hits you, your worst fear taking shape right in front of your eyes. Whatever he wanted with you, you could not let it happen, you could not fail your sister and get into the system like she did. She needed you. “Please, Aemond, I only want to be square with you and-”
There was a loud sound, plastic being crushed under immense force as his hand wrapped around the bag and violently squeezed. He took a deep shaky breath, his flashing gaze fixed on you as his knuckles turned white under the pressure. But it was gone seconds later, acting like it had never happened as he dropped the bag and started walking towards you.
“I used, once. This is how it all began,” he stated, a single slender finger brushing the edge of the table as he advanced. “I wasn’t really addicted, but I knew it was enough to cloud my mind, to make me believe that I needed it. But do you want to know what I really need, kitten? Why I stopped?”
You tried to hold his gaze when he lifted a single heated eye at you, excited by his little story, excited by something. He was in his element, he had the upper hand, he knew he was in control. You were only a slave to the fiery blood in your veins.
His finger had reached your arm by the time you registered his question, looming over it like a reverse magnet, untouching. He smiles when he sees chills prickle over your skin there, right before his pupils spread wider, an ink drop in water and you hold your breath.
“I like people begging me. I like the desperation in their voices, their scared little expressions as they mutter pathetic excuses, their pleas as I beat them…” You can feel the thrill in his tone, the pleasure that radiates off him, and you gasp when his finger finally touches your skin, burning. “I like hearing them beg me when they realise there is no escape, when they realise I’m the only solution, that I alone can give them what they want…I like this sensation of control, and I need to feel it on my own terms. Without any substances."
His hand has travelled down your arm, finding your pulse and you feel the thrumming of your heart meet his fingertips, pressing the delicate vein there. You wonder if he can feel your blood running within it, hot and wild. 
“You know, when Cole told me there was a lost pretty girl that wanted a refund, I laughed and could not wait to scare that girl. How naive she must be, how foolish. Coming here, wanting nothing more but to protect her poor little sister, asking what I cannot grant you, thinking you’ll get out of it like it’s nothing and not realising the mess you’re in. Just… perfect.”
You want to talk, argue, but you had stopped breathing altogether when his face leans slightly closer to your shoulder and you hear him breathe in your scent, humming within your neck. 
“But then, here you are… Pleading me, not once, but three times, kitten, with your sweet little tone of yours and I just-” he inhales brusquely, his pupil now completely blown out as you tremble beneath him. When he manages to talk again, his voice has dropped several octaves lower, guttural. “And now, let’s say that scaring you is not the only thing I want to do to you.”
The air feels sucked out of the room as tension fills it, palpable within the silence and you retain a whimper. His hold on your wrist turns stronger, as if to mark it, your pulse constricted beneath his fingers and you suddenly feel dizzy, gravity pulling you backward as you lose balance. You drop in the chair behind you like a stringless marionette, overthrown by him and his overwhelming presence.
He doesn’t flinch, neither does he comment as he leans over you, strong arms resting on the armrests at each side of you, trapping you as if he had planned everything. You huff when the tip of his hair grazes the skin of your cleavage, a silver curtain dropping under his face.
“So we're going to try this once…. Say please to me again, and I might reconsider your sister's situation.”
A ray of hope cuts through your foggy mind at his words, determination spurring within you as your treacherous tongue already rolls to form the words, eager to please him despite the lack of air in your lungs. “Please...”
The wood at your side cracks as he tightens his grip on the armrest, a repressed hiss dying within his throat as he composes himself again, hooded eye fixed on you, smothering.
“Hm… Yes,” he breathes, content visible on his features. “But the thing is, kitten, your sister was useful to me. She had access to people I didn’t, people like you. I’m sure you can see why it’s difficult for me to let her go.”
You know he is taunting you, dragging out what he wants from you and you know you have no choice but to indulge him, you need to indulge him. “She won’t survive if she keeps on, please.”
You can feel it, the pleasure he takes out of it, the delectable sensation he draws from your words as he licks his lips, a devious smirk tugging at them as he speaks slowly. “And what about you… Kitten?”
The near whisper makes your spine go rigid, his nose coming to loom over the junction of your jaw and you truly try to answer. “I- I don’t understand…”
He is the first to notice as his eyes are drawn to the sudden movement of your body under him: how tightly your thighs are clenched together, how tense you are as you shift, muscle tenses.
You blush shamefully, untying your legs to try to soothe the ache there as well as the heat pooling between them. He lifts a knowing eyebrow, observing you with excitement. "Hm… Not such a good girl after all, are you, kitten?”
He slowly lowers himself, broad hands coming to stroke the length of your thighs from your knees to your hips, the heat of his palms scorching you through your jeans and you repress a whimper, failing. “Did begging me turn you on, kitten?” 
His voice is hoarse, playful. You notice his own arousal pressing against the fabric of his pants and it makes your legs widen, watching helplessly as your body responds to your primal urges. “Do you need me to touch you? Is that what you want?”
You struggle, trying to fight what had been evolving since he had entered the room but you find yourself overpowered by your desire, submerged by it. "Yes…"
He arches his eyebrow higher. "Yes, what?"
"Yes, please."
He almost groans as he slowly comes to unbutton your jeans, a warm hand sliding under it and your stomach tenses when he connects with your dampness. "Fuck, kitten. Do you want to say please to me again?” 
He rises, giving himself a better angle as he comes to close his face over yours, suffocating as he waits for an answer out of you. When you give him none, he proceeds to grab your chin, pressing your cheeks between his fingers as he continues to stroke the heat between your thighs.
His face is close as he breathes your ragged breaths. “Lost your tongue?”
His gaze is unforgiving, his lips parted in delectation as you moan under him, and you suddenly feel the need to taste them, to chase them.
The movement makes him pull back, tutting as he grips your cheeks tighter. “That was bad. Very bad of you.”
You let out a plaintive whimper when he steps away, his hands departing your wet core and mouth as he comes to stand before you, jaw hanging low, slightly panting. His gaze is fixed on your glistening skin despite the harshness of it, a punishing glare within his eye as he lowers his jeans and briefs in order to free his bulging girth. You feel your mouth salivate as he starts pumping himself in wide long strokes, gaze transfixed on your face.
You’re unable to look away, heaving and hands gripping the wood of the chair tightly. You don’t realise the grinding of your hips against the surface of the chair, unconsciously chasing for what he robbed you of, wanting.
“Stop that,” he commands in a strained voice as precum starts leaking from his tip. You immediately obey, your body stilling as he comes closer, a pang hitting your core at the sight of his continuous movement over him. “You want a taste, kitten?”
One of his hands reaches for your hair, fingers tangling in them softly as he continues to stroke himself steadily, looking down at you with parted lips and he almost purrs when you nod bashfully. He guides you on the floor, eyes blown wide as he makes you kneel before him by a slight pull of your hair. You lick your lips in expectation, soothed by his hand within your strands and feeling the heat radiating off of him. 
You feel warmth spread within your cheek as you approach but he suddenly yanks your hair strongly, holding you into place in a hiss. “Then beg for it.”
He has stopped his ministrations over himself, rather squeezing the base of his shaft and making the already swollen tip inflate with blood as he watches you with a harsh and wild blue eye. You have to swallow the saliva that has accumulated in your mouth to talk. “Please, I want you in my mouth, Aemond.”
He groans as he lets go of his throbbing cock and loosen his hold over your scalp, allowing you to finally run a playful tongue along his length and wrap your hands around him, appeased by the sounds you draw out of him. “That’s it… Good girl.”
You try to go slow, hollowing your cheeks while you take him deeper and deeper, but as the minutes pass you feel the pressure of his hand in your hair tighten. The next moment he is claiming your mouth, making his tip hit at the back of your throat in loud lewd sounds as well as gag several times before he lets you go with a low growl.
You try to settle your breathing again as he wipes the single thread of saliva that connects you to his cock before probing you up by your chin, chest heaving in lust. “Do you even know how good that begging mouth feels? Do you even realise?”
You only feel the aching inside of your lower stomach heighten through your daze, and your mouth forms lazy words you don’t know the purpose of, blinking weakly. “Please, Aemond…”
“Fuck, kitten. Are you going to ask me to fuck you, is that it? Is that what you want to say?”
His thumb grazes the side of your jaw and you barely acknowledge his length against your hip, hot against your flesh. “I- Yes.”
A low grumble escapes his mouth right before you’re pushed on the sofa without warning, his hands rushing to get rid of his vest and pants before tugging at yours, forcing you to dig your hands into the cushions as he bends you over.
You quiver as your skin is met with the cool air but the next moment he moulds his chest against your back and you freeze, his mouth coming to position inches from your ear as a rough hand grabs your throat from behind, squeezing.
“From now on, kitten, you beg me for everything. You want to be touched? You beg me. You want to touch me? You beg me. You want my cock? You say please. You want to cum? You fucking ask permission. You’re gonna be extra polite for me, you understand?”
You let out a strained sound against his fingers he takes for an affirmation before taking hold of your hips, not wasting a second to align himself near your entrance and you exhale in want as he lets go of your neck. Your fists clutch the fabric of the sofa as he runs his length against your folds once, twice, and you can’t help but close your eyes in frustration, feeling his pleasure growing at what he knows you’re about to say. “Please…”
You hear his satisfied growl as his fingers presses deeper into your flesh and you let out a quick gasp as he plunges into you in a swift stroke, quickly replaced by needy moans as you feel the ache in your loins sharpen. He fills you, his thrusts growing from controlled to erratic, faint praises whispered through the sounds of smacking flesh as he roams his hand over your back, and soon you feel your muscles pulse around him in building tension.
It makes him tighten at once behind you, fingers bruising the flesh of your ass as he suddenly withdraws and with a few last strokes, spills onto your back with a ragged groan.
“Fuck, look at the mess you’ve made…” he tuts while you whimper from the sudden loss, feeling your walls pulsating over nothing as he watches his cock glistens with your fluids. “You don’t care about being dirty, do you? You just like being a good girl.”
You whine again as he spreads his seed over your lower back soothingly, not caring for the stains but rather snaking a hand under your shirt, cupping one of your breasts to squeeze it as you wiggle under him, his name on your tongue.
“What is it, kitten? Do you need to cum?” he purrs as he caresses your breast firmly, hoisting you up against him.
“Yes please, please…”
His hold tightens, his face coming close to your neck and you can feel his hot breath on your cheek as he coos. “Prettier.”
The heat in your stomach thickens, heart racing against your ribcage in nervousness and you melt into his embrace. “P-Please, I need to cum. I need you to make me cum.”
He hums in satisfaction as he turns you around, flattening you against the back of the couch and yanking your shirt over your head as he spreads your legs, his jaw dropping in elation when he slides two fingers inside of you, making your head fall back with a loud moan. Your legs barely hold you as he rubs his thumb over your clit at a consuming pace, his long fingers finding the rough spot within you as if he had known it all of his life, and you’re soon panting heavily.
His gaze is fixed on your face, enjoying every moment, every painful expression as you’re closing on your high, waiting for you to say exactly what he wants and when he feels your walls clenching around his fingers, he stops, violently squeezing your inside between his three digits.
You wail at the sensation, meeting his harsh gaze and fascinated eye and soon you let out a strained sob, your inside muscles constricting painfully. “Aren’t you forgetting something, kitten?”
You swallow with difficulty as he smiles, his grip on you merciless, unmoving and you feel your legs tremble. “Please, don’t stop, I want- I need to cum. Please, I beg you.”
“Good girls ask permission, remember?” he grunts as he starts his movement again, rough digits now too slow on your wetness. “Try again.”
“Can I please… cum,” you plead in a strained sob, gripping the back of the couch more tightly but when he starts stroking your insides again, you see nothing but white, the coiling sensation within your core finally snapping and he doesn’t stop until you’re a puddle under him, letting you sink on the couch in a ghosting embrace.
“That’s it,” he soothes, grazing your waist and breast before gently making you suck on his fingers after the last shockwaves of your climax, tasting yourself through your heavy breaths. “Such an obedient little kitten.”
You slowly start to get the control of your legs back as he wipes some sweat out of your hair, but his gaze is nothing but soothing. “Fuck, look how hard you made me again, with you begging me so sweetly…”
He slowly runs one of his hands up your thigh, his hardening state hitting your flesh briefly before he lifts your knees up, positioning his weight over each of your thighs and you blink in anticipation, too dazed to utter a word. You angle yourself better against his body, the only confirmation he needs before he plunges into you again, this time his desire is too strong to wait for you to find your composure back.
It burns, vividly so, your swollen flesh barely recovered from your previous climax and you start moaning loudly, your hand rushing to your mouth to stop the embarrassing sounds from escaping your throat.
Two hands come to snap it away, lacing them over your head in a secure hold and you sink your teeth in your flesh when you meet his fierce gaze, the roll of his hips unfaltering. “No no no, kitten. Let them hear you, hear how desperate you are for my cock, how much you like begging for it.”
“Kiss me.”
He recoils slightly, his thrust slowing gradually as his single eye widen, the black of it taking over. “I don’t kiss my pets.”
“Please...”
Your voice sounds broken, a hint of determination within it that makes him blink and you can clearly see him battling himself for a moment before he crashes his lips against yours. The suddenness of it makes you moan against him as he devours you, the roll of his hips starting again deeper, needier.
It hits every right spot despite the overstimulation and soon you feel a numbness take hold of you, goosebumps spreading over your body. “Aemond, I’m going to-”
He grunts against your mouth as his hand comes to play with your breast again, freeing one of your own in the process that you bring to his face, stroking the smooth skin there along with the scar that marks his cheek. “You’re not cumming yet, I need you to wait a little while longer, alright kitten?”
His thrust slows again and you feel the pleasurable pain of being denied once more, filled by the need to obey him. “I can’t-”
“Don’t you dare cum before I say so, be a good girl and wait for my fucking permission, you understand?”
You close your eyes in a tremendous effort not to let the stretching sensation of him rocking inside of you overcome you too fast, your back arching under him and you feel his free hand flatten against your stomach to immobilise you, shushing you in a husky tone.
You beg one last time, feeling your guts heating up with the way he is chasing his own climax with deep thrusts and you dig your nails in his shoulder.
“Fuck… Come on, kitten, come for me, you can let go.”
Your vision blurs, your eyes rolling back as you cry out, your body going numb under the shattering pleasure and you don’t register anything, not how he follows you minutes later as you clench around him nor where he spills himself. You just feel like your limbs don’t obey you anymore.
You huff, feeling Aemond’s scent and sweat envelop you and when you open your eyes he is looking down at you with a hooded eye.
His thumb massages a spot over your shoulder and a sorry expression passes on his feature as he sets a strand of your hair aside. “I can’t grant you what you asked for.”
You feel cold all of a sudden, the air biting your damp skin as his warm fingers graze your cheek, feeling your disappointment. 
“I’ll leave your sister alone, as you wished, but I’m not taking the drugs back. You’ll have to find a way to sell, as Maria promised she would.”
A wave of relief runs through you, happiness for your sister but an odd sensation takes place within your chest as the man next to you watches you with fierceness. “Because you… you’re going to be very useful to me, kitten.”
You don’t glance away, you don’t recoil.
Because you’re not sure you want to leave anyway.
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Tagging @watercolorskyy and thanking @babyblue711 for the beta reading. We cannot disappoint.
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lizpottersworld · 2 months
Note
hii, how about a poly marauders with reader thinking it was better when they were friends, after all they were the marauders : moony, pads, prongs, wormtail, no y/n
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౨ৎ reckless mistake (poly!marauders x reader)
summary: being in a relationship with the marauders wasn’t easy, and you loved them dearly. but its hard not to other think that they’re better off without you, was this a mistake?
pairings: poly!marauders x reader, sirius x reader, james x reader, remus x reader, peter x reader
i hope you enjoy, if there are any more scenarios/imagine ideas, submit them here!
It was silly really. Even though your boyfriends were perfectly happy you felt like you were straining on their happiness. You loved them dearly, but you couldn’t help but feel like you weren’t worthy of theres. They didn’t need you, they had each other, it was obviously a mistake, them bringing you into their relationship. After all, it was them four before you.
Plus, they seemed to have been distant recently anyway. Maybe they had noticed the mistake too? They all shared a dorm together, were all in the same house and you were just a quiet Hufflepuff who shared a room with girls you weren’t even close with.
Had they noticed that too? You were always dependent on them, yet they never seemed so dependent on you. They had each other, and you had them but you weren’t even sure they wanted you anymore.
The Marauders. Padfoot, Moony, Prongs and Wormtail. No y/n.
So why did they continue to lead you on like this? The more they dragged you along, the more it hurt and you just couldn’t bring yourself to end it yourself only causing more pain.
Even as the five of you were hanging out in their dorm, you still felt like the odd one out like you were just an extra.
Remus was lying on his bed, with Sirius on his lap as he tried to focus on studying but had given up at the sight of his boyfriend. James and Peter were bundled up on the floor by the sweet stash, picking out which ones their boyfriends would enjoy more.
And you? You were in the bathroom staring at your helpless self in the mirror with both hands resting on the sink.
When would this stop, were you even ready for it to happen. Would you rather stay in this endless cycle of being unwanted? Maybe, if it mean’t not losing the boys you cared about. But did they even feel the same about losing you?
Someone knocked on the door, snapping you out of your pitiful trance. Even the knock pattern sounded joyful, knowing it belonged to one of your happy-as-ever boyfriends it only made your heart pang more with guilt.
“Darling, you okay in there?” The familiar voice of Sirius, echoed into the small room as you helplessly wiped the tears from your tired face. To you, he sounded bored but in reality he sounded scarily worried for you.
Of course the boys had noticed your change in behaviour, they had for the past four weeks but just felt too awkward to ask.
“Yeah, sorry Sirius.” You plainly answered, tidying up your messy hair as you reached for the door handle. As the door opened all the attention moved to you, you and your alarmed look. You didn’t want the attention, you didn’t want them to know how hardly you were taking it all.
“Hey, Hey whats wrong, Dove?” Remus’ eyebrows furrowed as he walked towards you, he even sounded worried but you took it as unwanted pity.
Even as he tried to bring you into one of his warm loving embraces that you had always loved, you pulled away, shoulders slumping at the awkwardness of it all.
“Stop pitying me,” You frowned, “Just do it already, it hurts too much.” Your voice cracked, shaking your head at the boys you love.
James and Peter, instantly picked themselves off the ground as they made their way over to the statement you so easily assumed.
“Do what, honey?” James now frowned and that made another tear fall from your eye, seeing him with an unfitting frown on his face only made yours deepen.
“I understand, okay?” You manage to say through your sobs, a worried Peter’s hand now on your shoulder. “Please, just get it over with.” Remus shook his head in deep worry, “Please.” You now sobbed.
“Sweetheart, please breathe, it’s all okay.” James begged as your body helplessly fell to the floor as his body approached yours. Sobs racked through your body, and James squeezed you closer to him.
“What exactly do you think we’re going to do?” Sirius pressed further, as he also crouched to your level on the floor.
“I know you’re going to break up with me.” You hiccuped, pulling away from a broken James. All four of them made noises of disagreement and disbelief. How could you think you would break up with them, you were there everything.
“Our beautiful girl, we would never dream of it.” Remus softened, lifting your body into his loving arms. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
“Why would you think that?” Peter softly spoke, caressing your back in comfort. James and Sirius stood either side of you, as they instinctively wanted to know why you were so upset.
“Everything feels distant, and there was the four of you before it was me and you four. I just couldn’t help but feel like that you were better off without me.” You mumbled, feeling slightly embarrassed.
“Oh Dove.” Remus internally cried at the look on your pained face, he hadn’t realised just how horrible you had been feeling. And it was because of him? He felt like dying right then and then and he knew the others felt the exact same.
“I’m so sorry you felt like that, i didn’t even realise.” Sirius frowned, pulling you desperately into a hug. The guilt seeped from all four of them, you could feel it in their grasp. He pulled you into a passionate kiss as you melted in his hands like putty whilst he held your face as if he could never let go.
“I feel horrible. The four of us love you so much, not even words can amount.” James breathed as you and sirius unwantedly pulled away, and he pulled you into him to comfort you and himself.
“No, No please don’t feel bad,” Your heart ached, “It was silly, i should have just spoken to you four.”
“Love, i know how we are, we aren’t are as easy to talk to when we’re all together.” Peter smiled, knowing how it may have been a little bit intimidating.
“But, Dove, Next time please talk to us instead of drowning in sadness,” Remus interrupted, “We would never make you feel bad for having feelings.” He finished, pressing a soothing kiss to the crown of your head.
“I love you four, so much.” You laughed through the threatening tears, pressing a kiss on the side of each of their faces.
“We love you too, Sweetheart,” Sirius sweetly smiled, “Come on, let’s go to dinner.” He whispered into your neck, pressing a small kiss there too.
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ahhhwomen · 2 months
Text
Nothing really matters.
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Vampire Empire
Part 3
Pairing: DarkVamp!Wanda Maximoff x DarkVamp!Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader
A/N: Well this was depressing to write... Anyways, enjoy!
Disclaimer: English is not my first language. All mistakes are my own.
AU Warnings: Human pets, abuse, violence, possessiveness, probably incorrect vampire lore, angst, panic attacks, hurt/comfort, kitten play (?), also this is not a Carol positive fic (I have nothing against her, but I needed a villain), death  Minors DNI 18+
Summary: You feel numb, what does it matter anymore?
Word Count: 2.1k
Taglist: @thinking1bee
The next time either of them sees you is in one of Natasha’s business meetings a few weeks later.
Back in Carol’s possession, you kneel in the corner of the conference room while Carol raises her voice at anyone with a slight attitude toward her idiotic ideas.
After half an hour, the constant bickering between the blond woman and Natasha’s respective staff members had become background noise.
There is a crinkling of paper as Natasha scuffles her documents around for a moment while deep in thought. The paper is smooth and high quality, her golden rings glide against the white surface, and she traces black lines of information she can recite in her sleep.
To Natasha’s surprise, you had seemed indifferent to her presence, you didn’t even glance at her once during the introduction to today’s meeting.
Following the same line back and forth, the ink smudges and blurs after the seventh round of Natasha's thumb gliding gently on top of the unimportant details.
She had to give credit where credit was due. You were poised and unbothered.
She could not say the same for herself, however.
Ever since she could smell you getting in the elevator with blondie, she kept glancing toward the door, waiting for your arrival. And now, she continuously spares a glance in your direction when she thinks someone talks too loudly or expresses themselves with broad gestures.
It doesn't take long for her to understand you a little better.
Carol changes you.
Your eyes are cast downward, and you hold your head low in a display of obedience. You are sitting on your heels with your hands just out in front of your knees. Your back is strung tight to form a perfect line and the muzzle is only for show. But whereas your posture and attitude would be considered perfection, your eyes are empty.
Natasha’s chair creaks and groans as she rocks back and forth, the leather cushion softens the knockback as her leg bounces against the flooring, unfitting of her usual characteristics, she can’t seem to keep her calm and collected demeanor.
Small tears and wrinkles form, as Natasha tightens her hands against some case report she wrote half-heartedly before bed the previous night. She inhales sharply, her nostrils flaring.
You are still covered in bruises.
They are healing, and so are the once red and angry lines, they are now pinker and more muted. But it’s clear some of them were fresher, it had been close to a month since she had seen you last, yet the color of some were as fresh as a daisy.
Specifically, your face seemed to have been put through the gutter.
Though it was clear that whatever transpired that day hadn’t been repeated, she could still sense in you that Carol wasn’t very light-handed.
She tells herself it is because she pities you for having to go through the blonde’s rage, but there is also something about the two small puncture wounds on your neck that aggravates her.
Her fingers drum against the table in annoyance while she thinks it over, her nails clicking against the resin top of her newly polished conference table.
Pinching the skin between her eyebrows she sighs loudly. Enough so, that the man currently presenting stutters and has to loosen his tie before continuing with a slight tremor to his hands.
She can’t figure it out.
She huffs and readjusts her posture to show she is listening.
Never mind, the little mystery you are, she has business to attend to. With one last glance, she emerges herself back in the matter at hand and makes sure to fix Carol with a hard glare whenever something becomes too heated.
You are sitting on an old wooden bench in the garden.
The flowers bloom around you and rustle in the fresh, spring, wind. If you close your eyes, you can almost smell the rosebush across the tiny plot of land. The birds sing in a tune you are not familiar with, but it’s nice. Lilies hug your legs, all colorful and fresh, there are tiny little droplets atop their pedals, it must have rained before you got out here.
That would explain the chill that settles deep in your spine.
There are dogs around, you hear them bark and growl at each other on the other side of the fence, but you don’t mind.
Because you are in the garden. With a fence between you and them.
Until one of them jumps the fence.
You have been staring at the ground with a slight tremor lacing your every move for the better part of an hour. She seems like a calm dog, but she’s big, bigger than you, and there is this presence to her that you don’t know what to do with.
She smells like the flowers around you, maybe that’s why you don’t flee. No matter how much you want to, you are frozen in your seat as the big hound stares at you.
She licks her snout and blinks slowly while you sit there. It feels like she is mocking you, almost as if daring you to move.
The wind picks up every now and then, the howling of the other dogs growing louder and more concerning, but the big dog doesn’t bat an eye. She growls deeply, but you can tell it isn’t directed at you, and then the other dog’s calm.
Maybe she is a nice dog, but it doesn’t matter.
A dog is a dog.
The fence opens with a piercing screech. Even as you close your eyes in hope, the big dog does nothing. She doesn’t run away, but she doesn’t help either.
She just watches as Master drags you away. You don’t know why you thought she would do anything else.
Master is right.
Master is always right.
No one will help.
You don’t deserve it.
When the meeting commends, Carol drags you out of the room quickly, she has other matters to settle tonight, and she can’t be bothered to stay here too long.
Your knuckles rasp against the expensive flooring of Mrs. Romanoff´s office. The tasteful tree-work makes your bones ache, and your tag jingles repeatedly as bone connects with fifty thousand dollars worth of Brazilian rosewood. The blond woman tugs at your leash impatiently.
“Carol. Wait a moment.”
Please don’t.
Master halted her movements just before she passed through the elevator´s door, effectively also halting yours.
“There is some paperwork James wants you to finish up before you leave.”
Natasha waves her hand around with a roll of her eyes, showcasing false annoyance she knows the blond will eat right up, “Something about an unsettled bank record?” The redhead squints in the blonde’s direction, displeasure hidden not so greatly on the CEO’s face.
Natasha has to work extremely hard to not showcase how disgusting she finds the woman in front of her to be.
The woman beside you tenses up. She bunches her eyebrows and sighs before nodding slowly and releasing the tight clutch on your leash.
A pointed finger comes into view as Carol shifts her body towards you and tilts her head downward to face you. “Stay here.” Her voice leaves no room for arguing, it’s a clear command, you know she only does it to showcase her power over you. You couldn’t talk back even if you wanted to, the clinic made sure of that long before you even knew Masters hard angles.
Nonetheless, you bow your head and place your rump back onto the cruel flooring, somehow it feels even stiffer than the concrete inside your familiar slammer.
There is a long and rather awkward silence before Miss Romanoff clears her throat and breaks the stillness.
“Are you in pain?” Natasha gestures towards her own face as if you need a hint to understand what she means.
Just a few months ago, Romanoff acknowledging you in the slightest would send you through a rollercoaster of fear and wonder. Now you merely play dumb and tilt your head in confusion.
Of course, it hurts.
That was the point, wasn’t it?
“You smell different.” Carol scrutinizes you from afar.
If it weren’t for the years of experience you have with this sort of thing you would give yourself away immediately by tensing up and begging for her mercy, instead, you remain impassive.
The blond woman studies you carefully, waiting for any telltale that you heard her.
It’s easier than you thought.
Maybe it’s from the emotional drainage these days have been, but you barely feel anything as Carol looks you over. No matter how much she has hurt you, her eyes hold nothing compared to the power that the Maximoff clan’s leader has in hers.
You can hear the familiar crunch of rough concrete beneath a heavy army boot.
Master moves closer, but still, you feel nothing.
It’s been three days since that day. The first night you sobbed your sorrows, your pain, your fear, everything that has been building up and suppressed throughout the years all expressed in a puddle of tears and blood.
You don’t know what the women wanted, but something about them had made ancient wounds reopen, and the floodgates that followed were inevitable.
You don’t even remember falling asleep, you find it more likely that you passed out from dehydration or exhaustion.
The other days had passed in a blur.
It’s like you have been stuck in a trance where nothing really matters anymore.
Then the smashing of keys came back, and still, you were inconsolable. You didn’t even acknowledge her when she ran her hands over your bare body. Didn’t blink as her hands took a threatening hold of your collar.
She was testing this new side of yours; you could tell it angered her that she didn’t affect you.
You ruined her little power trip of the day.
She grips the back of your neck and forces you to face her. “Look at me when I am talking to you!” Spit sprays on your face as she talks through gritted teeth.
You don’t care, you just stare at her through hooded eyes, looking but not seeing.
Her hand connected hard with your face; you could feel the vibration inside your skull. And yet, all you could think about were them.
The feeling of concrete pouring through your veins wasn’t so scary anymore.
*slap*
You wonder what would happen if she went all the way…
*slap*
Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if they killed you.
*slap*
“LOOK AT ME!” Carol screams into your ear, but it is fuzzy and unintelligible to you.
*slap*
“CAN’T YOU TELL I AM TALKING TO YOU, YOU STUPID BITCH!?”
*slap*
“Look at me?” Her hand strokes your chin lightly, but you know her…
*slap*
*slap*
Your head bounces against the pavement.
*slap*
Your vision becomes blurry and unfocused.
She hit you a total of twenty-four more times, before finally relenting and stomping away.
From that day forward you decided to play into it, pretend like what took place with the powerful women never happened to begin with. You were sure it would anger them.
If this is what Carol does when you ruin her little high.
Maybe, they will return and finish what they started if you ruin theirs.
Natasha scratches the nape of her neck as you sit there staring into nothingness. Your brows are slightly raised, and your eyes are wide, to Natasha, it seems like you are in a completely different world.
She leans against the wall, her shoulder squishing against the glass panel, and she crosses one leg over the other. Relying solely on her right leg to hold her up, she looks down at her dress shoes.
Her question was stupid, she knew as much, but what else was she supposed to say?
She wanted to talk to you.
Nat knows she should just leave you be and return back to her office, but when you were being led out of the room earlier your eyes had connected with her, it was a mere millisecond. But in that moment Natasha had felt a chill run down her spine.
Something was definitely wrong.
However, she didn’t expect you to completely shut down after just one simple question.
You are unresponsive to any stimuli while you sit in the hallway with Natasha’s presence close by. The older redhead tries to tap her foot or grunt obnoxiously, just to get a response, but nothing.
It’s not until you can hear Carol’s heavy footsteps that you quicken up and bow your head down.
Carol nods in Natasha’s direction before she passes her and collects you. Her gruff hands slide up and down the expanses of your leash until she finds the position that will yield her the most amount of control over your movements.
If the circumstances were different, Natasha would kill Carol on the spot.
Yet, as Carol takes ahold of your leash and steers you both into the elevator, Natasha lets you go.
Convincing herself it’s for the better. Again.
407 notes · View notes
illyrian-dreamer · 10 months
Text
Our girl – Part 2
Azriel x Cassian x Reader angst
Summary: Deeming you unfit for a mission, the Inner Circle have betrayed your trust and shattered your life’s mission to avenge you sister. And the two males you love most were at the centre of it all.
Word count: 6k
Warnings: Reader unwell/not eating, depression and lots of angst.
Keep reading ⬇️
--------
You slept through any offerings of daylight the next day.
The bustle of the infirmary was a hum to your ears, your exhaustion keeping the world a distance away. Even the healers couldn't stir you when the frequented your room, changing your dressings and checking your pulse.
You woke for a meal of simple broth in the evening, and were glad to have kept it down. You still fought feverish sweats and chills, and the ache in your stomach and chest was persistent. Madja would oversee your care as she had the evening before. She had given one instruction – the more rest, the better.
Night set on the ward again, and you were glad to be enveloped by dim lighting and quieter activity.
Unsure of when sleep had found you, you awoke in an open field. It was bright, the high-pointed sun drenching the landscape in gold, the lake in the distance sparkling and inviting. Familiarity warmed you more than the sun, yet the scene around you remained hazy.
Ears pricking at a ripple of laughter ahead of you, your heart fluttered with excitement. It was instinct to chase that voice, your bare feet pushing from the warmed grass beneath them as you broke into a run. Your skirts kicked beneath you before you hiked them above your knees, both your speed and smile growing.
Ahead was the source of the laughter, a child who also ran, her long locks bouncing with a distinct curl. Meryl. She was no more than 10 years of age, her childish laugh echoing in your ears as your heart pulled at the sight of her.
“Meryl!” you called, continuing the chase, your heels pounding to the ground as you tried to speed up. “Slow down!” You heard your own voice then, also of a child.
The setting around you flooded with detail as a lost memory found you. Your visit to your parent’s good friend in Spring Court, an Uncle of sorts, his charming lake-side cottage where you and your sister would spend hours swimming and playing – and chasing! Of course! Each day you raced to see who would reach the lake first, and Meryl had always been that little bit faster.
Meryl responded with another laugh, so innocent and carefree, as a child should be. You reached a hand out, your heart pounding as you struggled to catch up. You ached for one more chance to speak with her or to hold her, or even to see her face. But she bounded onwards without ever turning her head.
A harsh breeze blew from behind, and the golden glow of the once-memory quickly turned grey and harsh as a storm threatened the sky. The water of the lake was now violent, thrashing with unforgiving waves. You halted your run, yet Meryl bound forward, her laughter drowned by the roar of the wind.
“Meryl!” you called again, your voice now of your adult self, urgent and panicked. As you tried to resume running, you almost toppled over, your hands catching you before you could fall. Something had anchored your bare feet to the ground.
With a yell of frustration, you tried to pry your legs free. Up ahead, your sister’s figure grew smaller, her direction set for the dangerous waters.
“Please! Meryl stop!�� Tears began to well in your eyes as you fought to free yourself. You saw them then, the swirls of shadows that kept your legs pinned and unmoving.
“Wha-? Get off me!” You frantically clawed at them, but instead they climbed your arms too, forcing you to the ground.
Hands were on you then, tugging at your clothes and pulling at your limbs. Shadows mixed with siphons blue and red, and swirls of night clouded your vision, between it peeks of Meryl slipping further and further away. You clutched at the roots of the grass, desperate to pull yourself free.
“Stop! I have to save her!” you begged, your voice breaking with despair. But those hands were unrelenting, so strong in their grip as you tried to summon your power. That too rendered useless, cracking to a quick fizzle without so much as a sting.
Before you could call one final plea to your sister, shadows and hands and magic smothered your mouth, drowning your cry in their hold. All you could do was watch in horror as Meryl dived beneath the thrashing waves before your vision was overcome with smoke and night, and finally black.
————
Azriel and Cassian watched as you writhed in your cot, the feverish sweat on your brow glowing in the soft fae light of the infirmary wing.
“What’s wrong with her?” Cassian whispered, his face etched with concern as he stepped closer to you. He gingerly bought a callused hand to your cheek, running one gentle stroke down the length of it.
Azriel’s frown deepened as he heard your sister’s name muttered on your lips, followed by a whimper and ragged breaths. “It’s a fever dream.” he answered, his arms folded as he kept to the edge of your cot.
Cassian looked down at you, noting the tears that stained your cheeks.“We shouldn't have come here,” he said, his jaw tight from guilt. “She’s still unwell, we should let her rest.”
He and Azriel had easily snuck into the ward, winnowing straight past the few healers on night shift, and even slipping past Madja who was buried in paperwork at the desk near the entrance of the infirmary. But now Cassian eyed the door, just as eager to leave.
Azriel was only half listening to his brother as he commanded his shadows. They climbed at the base of your cot, swirling inwards as they found their way to your face and limbs, cooling you as you continued to stir, now a little more gently. Azriel did not show his satisfaction as he watched you sigh, finding some comfort in their touch.
The sound of a curtain being harshly drawn caused the males to jump, revealing an incredibly unimpressed Madja. Azriel cursed himself silently, having used all of his shadows to soothe you without setting guard to the room.
“I don’t want to hear your sorry excuses,” she said coldly to the males, pushing past them and setting a pale next to your bed. She shooed Azriel’s shadows as if they were a mutt on the street, and they quickly scattered back to their master.
“How is she doing?” Cassian asked, eyes pleading.
“I will not disclose that to you,” the healer answered tightly. Wringing the towel within the pale, Madja wiped the sweat from your brow. Your stirring had stopped at least, and you seemed to have found a deeper slumber than before. Madja sighed now, before casting a half look to the boys. “She’s improving, but is still quite weak.”
The males nodded, your sickly skin, limp body and slick hair as evident as the healer’s prognosis.
“Do I need to have words with the High Lord and Lady of their emissaries overstepping my regulations?” Madja asked without looking their way, wringing the cloth yet again before pressing it to your neck and bust. “Not to mention violating patient privacy,” she added.
Cassian hung his head low. “I’m sorry. I don't know what we were thinking.” Azriel refused to look at the healer, his eyes never leaving you.
Madja continued to care for you in silence, allowing Cassian and Azriel to grovel for a few more moments. Picking up the pale, she made to leave your bedside before answering the males. “I have worked with enough Illyrian’s to know of your possessive nature. But I won't be so forgiving if she wakes to find you here. Already your scents have caused more harm than good. She must not know you came, it will only upset her and might unravel her progress.”
“She’s that upset with us?” Azriel asked, his gaze beyond the healer before him, still fixed on you.
“Yes,” she answered plainly. Neither of the males knew what to say. “Now leave, before I regret showing any patience for boyish brutish idiocy.”
Azriel took the risk of another tongue lashing to send a final shadow to caress your cheek, before clasping his brother’s arm and winnowing back to the House of Wind.
————
You were kept at the infirmary for another four nights without any further disturbance from your family. They asked to visit, of course, practically begging through letters and pleas to Madja. But each of their requests were left unanswered, and you too buried your need to have them by your side while you healed.
It gave you time to think of a plan – you could not stay at the infirmary forever. When you had first moved the Velaris, while training as a spy, you lived in a small apartment in the cliffs that faced the Sidra. You hadn't visited there in almost a decade, but your once-home was written to your name, and vacant.
Madja insisted on settling you in, helping you climb the stairs to your room as fatigue still lingered.
Prying the stiff wooden door open, you almost smiled at the sight of your old home. A mattress lay on the floor in the corner of the room just as you had left it – you had never been able to afford a frame on training wages. A small chest of drawers was pushed up against the wall, and the kitchenette was lined with those charming blue tiles just as you remembered.
You were thankful Madja had sent a maid ahead of time, and while the musk of an unused apartment lingered, you were glad to not have to dust in your current state. The small fireplace contained fresh logs of wood which meant there was no urgent trip to the markets either.
“This is it,” you spoke more to yourself as you ran a hand along the kitchenette before making your way over to the chest, prying a stiff drawer open.
Madja was less than impressed. “Child, perhaps you would consider more comfortable accommodation? One where the bed is not on the floor?”
“I’ll be fine here,” you answered, distracted as you searched through your old drawers, finding them empty.
“The High Lord and Lady have offered to accommodate you elsewhere–”
“I don't want their help,” you snapped, shoving the drawer back into the chest with notable anger.
She pressed her lips into a thin line. “You don't need to suffer at the cost of their mistakes, Y/N.”
You sighed then, pinching the bridge of your nose. “I won't accept their fortune any longer. This home is mine, I worked hard for it. I will be perfectly fine here while I figure out a plan.”
Madja nodded, scanning the room once over. “Do not forget to take your medicine,” she lectured before turning to the door, knowing better than to linger. There was no remedy for how quiet the apartment fell when she left, leaving you alone with your thoughts.
Mustering the little energy you had, you set your kettle to boil, waiting patiently for the steam to whistle from the tin, the only sound to fill the apartment beyond the distant hum of the town below.
After a few sips of tea, exhaustion found you again. Setting the mug of tea aside on the cold wooden floor, you crawled into bed, pulling the too-thin covers over your head and leaving your drink unfinished. With your back to the world that beckoned outside, you faced the wall instead, tracing a crack that ran across its length.
How motivated you had felt when you first moved here. At the time, you were grieving Meryl of course, but you had a plan – a one way ticket to ensure a balance in the world, to fight for some sense of justice. Never had you thought it could fail so miserably.
So you traced that crack with a weak finger, remembering your sister, mourning her with a fresh wave of pain.
Grief continued to weigh heavy on your chest the following few days. You had intentions on visiting the market, buying some food and sustaining yourself while you made a new plan. But instead you felt anchored to your mattress, the idea of cooking and bathing and facing the outside world completely overwhelming. Instead, cups of tea brewed only to be left untouched, yours eyes heavy as you watched the steam rising from the mug swirl and dance, and by the time it finally cooled you were already asleep.
And the cycle continued. In the moments you had the strength, you wept. And in the moments you didn’t, you slept.
It was after five days that Madja visited to replenish your medicine. The healer opened the door to your apartment when her knocks went unanswered, casting the first bit of natural light in the room in days. With your back facing outwards, you didn’t stir as she walked over and immediately collecting the assortment of mugs on the floor.
“Have you left this room at all?”
You offered a small shake of your head, unable to lift it from your pillow, your eyes red and stiff with dried tears.
“Have you eaten?”
Your stillness was her answer. Madja sighed. “Well we simply can't have that. I understand a loss for appetite, so I will bring some additional brews to keep you sustained.”
“I don't want them.” It took all your strength to turn over your shoulder and look at the healer, your voice hoarse having gone days without speaking.
She simply shook her head as she looked down at you. You do not have a choice, her expression read.
“Might you try to get some fresh air? Or bathe? I can assist with both if you–“
But you were already turning your shoulder to the wall, immediately exhausted at the thought of leaving your bed. “I’ll do it tomorrow Madja,” you sighed. “I’m too tired in this moment.” You didn't have the energy to wonder if she bought your lie or not.
The healer said nothing as she closed the door quietly behind her.
————
“I’m concerned for her wellbeing.” Madja sat opposite the High Lord and Lady in their study, a large willow desk between them. Rhys sat with his hands laced together tightly, a deep frown etched on his face. Feyre beside him held a sleeping Nyx, doing her best to not stir the babe while she exchanged looks of deep concern.
“She isn't eating. She barely drinks a thing, and has failed to take much of her medicine. If she continues at this rate, she will fall much more ill.”
“What can we do?” Feyre asked gently, stroking Nyx’s hair while he snoozed at her chest.
“I don’t suggests interfering at this stage. I am only here to warn you of my concerns.”
“And what happens if she worsens?” Rhys asked, his violet eyes holding the stare of the healer in front of him.
“I will call for you then. I hate to suggest the use of your daemati abilities, but if it comes down to life or death…” Madja trailed off, her hands clamping even tighter in her lap.
“We understand,” Rhys responded with a single nod, casting a knowing look to his mate. “Thank you for coming here, Madja.”
The healer stood to leave. “Do not thank me. Again, I am clear to not involve myself in what has occurred between you and Y/N. I am here purely as her healer.”
The High Lord and Lady stood too, seeing her to the door.
“Please keep us informed, and if there is anything that we can provide,” Feyre added quickly, almost desperate to convey her care.
Madja responded with a tight nod, turning to leave. And had she left only moments earlier, she would have found two Illyrians by the door, overhearing the entire conversation. But they were already on their way.
————
Lost again in deep sleep, you didn't stir as the Shadowsinger and General entered your apartment, Azriel’s shadow’s having easily pried the lock open.
The sight of your trembling figure curled up on the mattress pulled at both their hearts, your hands fisted at the covers with deep yet disturbed sleep.
Azriel stealthily made his way across to the bathroom, the sound of running water soon filling the room. With no dining table or chair in sight, Cassian set the meal they had bought in the small kitchen before quietly approaching you. He knelt down on two strong knees, brushing the backs of his fingers against your cheek before gently shaking you.
“Y/N, wake up doll, it’s us,” he spoke with a hushed voice.
Stirring slightly, you were slow to wake, blinking through the darkness as you were sure you were still dreaming. But as your eyes cleared, the large figure in front of you revealed itself – wings tucked in, hair pulled back in a signature bun, leather strapped up to his knuckles. Cassian was the definition of strength met with comfort, and it took you a few moments to come to your senses.
Your body froze before you sat up quickly, shoving his hands off of you. “Wh-wh?” you stuttered, your eyes dancing between his.
Cassian raised his palms in surrender. “It’s alright, don't panic. We’re just here to help you with a few things.”
Your found your voice then, deep from within your chest, hoarse and broken from days of crying. “Get out,” you spat.
Azriel appeared from the bathroom, watching from the doorway. You flashed your eyes to his, rage quickly filling your veins. How dare they intrude.
“We just want to make sure you’re all right sweetheart, and then we’ll go,” Cassian reasoned. He stood now, offering you his hand.
Days without eating meant the hurry you stood in caused your head to spin, black dots now dancing in your vision. But you held your ground, your voice even icier than before. “I said get out.”
“C’mon doll, let us help you for five minutes.”
“You’re idea of help undid everything I ever worked for.” You shoved at his chest, and he let you push him a few steps back, your hands trembling as you pulled them back.
“Y/N when was the last time you ate?” Azriel’s voice was gentle too, your vision reeling as you whipped your head to glare in his direction. Shaking your head, you curled your hands to fists. It was none of their business.
“Please, sweetheart,” Cassian reached for you then, which earned another shove from you.
“No Cassian! No! Do you understand you have done? Did you even consider what would happen when you decided I wasn't good enough?”
“It wasn’t like that Y/N. We had to keep you safe.” Azriel stayed by the bathroom door, his arms now crossed as shadows slowly seeped on the wooden floor towards you.
Days of isolation and exhaustion had tears pricking at your eyes already. “You are cowards. And I want nothing to do with either of you.”
“Please Y/N–,” Cassian tried one more time.
“Get out of my life.” You had never uttered words so cold. You shoved the General again, but this time he stayed put. Your gritted your teeth, seething at him. “You broke me!”
Cassian looked down at you, his brow pulling in sorrow.
“You shattered my world.” Another unsuccessful push, and you were crying. “Now I have nothing, I am nothing.”
Both of them watched you as your face crumpled, your anger rising as you punched at Cassian’s chest, too weak to cause any harm. “I hate you!”
Cassian’s eyes welled as he stood still, taking the beating without so much as a flinch. “We’re so sorry,” he whispered.
You shook your head, ignoring his apology as you began pounding against him with weak fists. “I hate you both!”
Tears now rolled down the General’s cheek as he let you continue your assault. “We’re so so sorry Y/N.”
You kept shaking your head as Cassian caught both of your wrists, holding them as he took to one knee in front of you.
“We love you,” Cassian cried, prying your fist open and kissing your palm, kissing up your arm, his thumb stroking your hand in the way he knew soothed you. “Please forgive us.”
You broke at his plea. He was a good male, they both were. But they had turned your heart to stone, turned you to someone so damaged, so unrelenting and unforgiving, someone you never wanted to be. You were a monster of their own making, and there was no undoing it. Sobs racked through your body, and it took everything you had not to crumble to the ground.
Azriel was behind you then, his shadows curling around your exposed skin, soothing you where they could. You did not fight him, not as he took your hands from Cassian, not as he too kissed your tears away while murmuring his own apologies, not even when he lifted you from under your knees, carrying you to the bathroom. You hated him, your mind screaming at you to yell and hiss and spit, to swear him from your home and from your life. But in this moment, where exhaustion and isolation loomed, you had no more fight to give.
Azriel didn’t speak as he undressed you before placing you in the tub. You were still crying as he washed you, scarred hands so attentive to your body, the sound of water sloshing and pouring over your head mixing with your laboured breaths. You kept your knees to your chest, your head turned away, but you let him scrub you clean.
He gently pulled you from the tub into a fresh towel, wrapping you in the soft cotton before lifting you again. Your apartment had come to life with a small fire Cassian had lit, low flames flickering with warmth.
Azriel moved to sit on the bed, keeping you bundled in his lap. Cassian was crouched in front of you, his hands holding a vial of stew, the steaming contents bought to your mouth on a spoon.
“Eat this,” Cassian said gently. You wanted to be stubborn, to fight them more than the pathetic amount you already had. But your stomach cramped with hunger at the scent of the stew, and you were to weak to refuse it. So you let Cassian feed you, your body growing more and more slack the fuller your stomach became. A vial of medicine was quickly tipped against your lips too, and you swallowed its contents with a small whimper.
In your exhausted haze, your hardly noticed Azriel dress you in fresh clothes, even braiding your hair before he lay you down, pulling the covers over your.
Cassian and Azriel were watching you as you fought your sleep, heavy eyes lifting to find them.
“I meant what I said.” Your voice was a mere whisper
They exchanged a look, before Cassian crouched to pull the covers closer to your chin. “We know.”
There was a beat of silence. “I want you to leave me be.”
“Not until you start taking care of yourself,” Azriel spoke, his voice soft yet strict. You didn't have any energy to fight back, to tell him he could blame himself for the spiral you had entered.
“Go,” your rasped before turning your back to them, enticed by the comfort of sleep with a full belly, clean clothes and warm apartment.
“Rest up Y/N.” Cassian’s words were a lullaby you couldn’t fight.
“We love you,” Azriel added, and the last thing you felt was the caress of cool shadows at your neck before you drifted off to a dreamless sleep.
————
Waking to sunlight, you felt notably stronger than you had in days. You knew it was because of the care Azriel and Cassian had provided, which frustrated you to your core.
Azriel’s words rung clear in your mind. They would not leave you be until you started to take care of yourself, so you would leverage the strength you had to come up with a plan.
It only took a few days for your Uncle to reply. Yes, he still had his home by the lake. Yes, you could stay with him as long as you needed. There was work to be done in Spring Court, rehabilitation and building after Hybern had depleted almost every resource from the lands, Tamlin not yet strong enough to recoup his court after the war. You could find sanction there, help others and distract yourself with work. And most importantly, distance yourself from the people you once loved.
With your next steps laid clear, you sent a letter to the River House, asking for one final favour.
————
Rhysand was waiting at the River House terrace alone as promised. Cloaked in signature black, he watched the stars dance in the night sky with a gentle grip on the railing, his back to you as you approached.
This was the same terrace that had hosted many evening drinks, jokes and conversations shared with your family, and even offered the much needed escape away from the buzz of various balls and celebrations. A twinge of pain stabbed at your heart at those memories. Today, it was just a terrace, a mere meeting point before you stepped towards your new life.
It was unsurprising Rhys had heeded your instruction to meet you alone, you knew he would do it. You wondered if he lied about his whereabouts, or if he instead warded your presence from the others. He had likely hidden your scent from Cassian and Azriel, but what about his mate?
Saying goodbye to Feyre and Rhys at the same time had felt far too painful, impossible even. While they were equals, High Lord and Lady as well as mates, they were still very different beings. Feyre was too forgiving, too caring and loving to have reached this point on her own. It needed to be Rhys, you needed to direct this at someone who could take it, someone who deserved it.
“How are you feeling?” he asked, turning now, hands sliding to his pockets. You ignored his question, stopping a few paces away. Tension hung heavy between you.
“Thank you for meeting me,” you said tightly. Rhysand didn't speak, but offered an arm to the seating behind you. You sat down silently, your last act of obedience.
“I can no longer serve the Night Court,” you said plainly.
Rhysand didn’t flinch, wise enough to have known this was coming. “That does not mean you don't have a home here,” he answered calmly, as if that logic was reason enough to stay.
You shook your head stubbornly. “Please accept my resignation.”
Rhysand sighed then, leaning forward on his elbows to level a look at you. “I’m aware, Y/N, and I accept. This formality isn’t necessary.”
You knew that, it wasn't why you were here. Rhysand waited patiently for you to continue.
“I need a favour.”
“Anything,” he responded almost instantly.
“I need you to let me leave.”
Rhysand sat back now, a small frown pulling at his brow. “The choice has always been yours.”
Shaking your head, you looked up at the High Lord. “I don't trust that wherever I go, I won't be followed.”
Rhysand raised his brows.
“After recent events, I know Azriel and Cassian won't allow me that freedom.”
Rhysand let out a quick breath before nodding once, violet eyes finding the nights horizon. “I’ll ask them to adhere to your wishes.”
“As if that is enough,” you bit back, ice laced in your tone. “Pull rank, use your power, lie or cheat or trick, I don't really care. Just make it happen, it’s the least I deserve.”
Rhysand breathed quietly as he studied you. “Consider it done,” he said finally.
Gratefulness was an instinct, but you stubbornly bit down your thanks. Instead, a moment of silence fell between you.
“Where are you going?” Rhys pried.
“Do not ask me that.”
“I care for your safety.”
“I don’t want your care.”
Rhysand audibly sighed then, one hand reaching at the distance between you, finding place on the chase. “Tell me, Y/N. Say it out loud.”
You flashed your eyes to him. He looked back at you, his expression worried, concerned, pitying. Gods you hated that look.
“There is no point,” you said coldly, struggling to hide the grit of your teeth.
“I can take it,” he said softly.
Rage coursed through you at an uncontrollable speed. “You think I'm sparing you?” You let out a cold laugh, moments away from that savage, lethal switch, your power now stinging at your fingertips.
“I think you’re far from having faced the truth.”
A snarled escaped you, and you could feel your power surge, igniting your irises with a brilliant yellow. Had you not been so blind with anger, you might have realised this was exactly what Rhysand intended.
“It’s the truth you seek then?” you began. “How about the fact that you have plagued my heart with more hate than I ever believed possible. Shall I tell you of the shame that haunts me day and night that I let myself trust you for all these years? Or that I was naive enough to think I could find another family after Meryl’s death? But it would seem the only family I have is dead, and it has in fact always been that way. You broke me Rhys, you all broke me. I was a fool to have loved you so dearly, and ignorant to believe you ever loved me in the same way.”
Hot, angry tears streamed down your face, washing away the current that glowed in your eyes. Pressing a hand against your heart, you tried to smother the ache that throbbed at your confession. “You preach of a better court, one of choice and freedom and honour. But you snatched that away the moment it was mine for the taking.”
Rhys had kept his eyes on you, his face breaking with a little more sorrow at each sentence you spoke. “You’re right,” he said. “You’re absolutely right.” He waited a moment before placing a gentle hand on your knee. “Mother above cannot convey how sorry I am Y/N.”
You shook your head, tears welling and blurring your vision. It wasn't enough, you knew that, and Rhys knew it too.
His voice was even more gentle as he leaned forward. “I love you Y/N. Well all love you.”
Your voice was small now. “Not in the way I loved you. Not in the way family should love one another.”
“I disagree,” he countered. “You have to understand, as your High Lord, I would never send you to your death knowingly.”
“I wouldn't have died in vain,” you quietly, breaking his gaze with a flicker of shame. “All I ever wanted was a chance to make things right.”
You shocked yourself with the weight of your words, the extent of your willingness to avenge Meryl was something you hadn't even admitted to yourself. You would have died with content knowing you had at least tried to kill Alvar. But Rhys had seen that in you, well before you understood it for yourself. And together your family decided instead to keep you safe.
“I was hoping your motivation no longer overthrew your will to live,” Rhys admitted. With a deep sigh he cupped your chin in a parent-like way. “Look at me.” Whether you liked it or not, your eyes found his.
“Imagine I had taken the time to let you kill Alvar and instead he escaped, and innocent Velarians were hurt because of it – would you forgive me for putting your needs above their safety?”
Your eyes welled. “How could you ask me that Rhys?”
“I’m not trying to upset you. I’m just trying to show you the weight of the decision I had to make.” He offered you a broken smile, reaching to swipe away a tear that rolled down your cheek. To your own surprise, you let him.
“That is not the only issue here.” Your voice was thick, your throat strained as you contained the sob that jerked within. “You’ve asked me to see it from your perspective, now please consider mine. You collectively decided that the mission would be kept a secret. You banded together to act dishonestly, knowing it would ruin me. How can I ever trust you again? How am I supposed to see you as my family?”
Rhys closed his eyes as his brows gave a painful tug, a deep breath pushing out through his nose. A large hand rested gently on your knee, his thumb swiping in a sympathetic way.
“I’ll admit Y/N – I knew that this would hurt you, but I never thought we’d lose you entirely.”
You sniffed. “Then you underestimated me.”
Rhys’s violet eyes found yours, sincerity and admiration shining in the stars that beheld them. “I did. I absolutely did.” He took another deep breath before speaking. “I’m a fool to have underestimated your loyalty, your dedication and your bravery. Over 500 years in existence, and I should have known that was never mine to control.”
You stared back at him, and while the ache in your heart was far from cured, a small sense of calm washed over you. It was relief you desperately needed – to finally be understood. “Thank you for saying that,” you croaked.
Rhys watched you with a pained smile. “I only want good things for you Y/N, wherever you choose to be. You will always have a home here if you want it, if you can ever forgive us for what we did.”
And in those words, a new well opened in your heart, one that you had not seen coming.
Hearing Rhys acknowledge your decision to leave the Night Court was devastating, so much so that your hand instinctively pressed agains your heart again. There would be no more fighting or pleading, no more fists thrown or cries of rage and confessions of love. He would let you go, because you had asked it. It was the least you deserved, yet it hurt in an entirely new way.
Ahead of you, the path of solitude lay clear. You had fought for it without any idea how painful it would be to take that first step. You couldn't help the sob that escaped you as you dropped your head to your hands.
“I never wanted to leave,” you admitted through ragged breaths.
Rhys bought a gentle hand to your back. “Then stay.”
“I can’t! I can’t stay here. I am so angry with you, all of you! And I don't think I’ll ever be strong enough to forgive this, not fully.” Your cries were uncontrollable as you tried to quiet them with your hands.
Rhys was stroking your hair as he said ever so softly. “I know.”
You sniffed, blinking up at your High Lord. “There’s nothing left for me here.” There was a cold bite to your words, even as you let him comfort you.
“I know,” he repeated with that same softness and understanding.
You watched him for a moment longer. Here he was, everything you needed in a High Lord – a leader and a friend, saying all the right things in all the right ways. But he was flawed, like anyone, and that flaw had been your downfall.
“I will be leaving Velaris tonight. Please, don't ask for my whereabouts. I need… I need a clean break.”
Rhys brow twitched before he nodded tightly. “You have my word.”
Gathering yourself, you stood to smooth your skirts before looking up at your High Lord for the final time. “I will miss Nyx dearly.”
Pain sliced across Rhysand’s face in a way you had never seen, tears immediately pricking at his violet eyes. He swallowed, containing himself still. “I wish it could have been any other way Y/N, truly.”
“As do I.”
And that was all that could be said. You turned from him, pacing towards the exit while casting your eyes to the magnificent array of stars, searing the Velarian night sky to memory as you admired its beauty for the final time.
“You must know!” Rhys spoke out, a hint of urgency in his tone. “It was fear Y/N. It was fear of losing you, not ever a lack of love.”
Glancing over your shoulder, you nodded once, a broken smile on your lips. “I know,” you spoke, biting back the quiver in your lip. “I know that now.”
And you let those words be your last at the Court of Night.
--------
Part 3>>>>
AN: Thank you so much for your patience with this, I hope you guys like it! ❤️
YES there will be a Part 3. Update: Part 3 is out. I’m super keen to explore how things go for the Reader in Spring Court, and maybe even weave in a little bit of redemption for a certain blondey?? Besides, there are still some things that have gone unsaid between the Reader and the boys... and she needs to figure out these powers! Watch this space 👀
Comment to my tag list (either general or for Our girl) 😊
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lazycats-stuff · 23 days
Note
What about male reader being Alfred's nephew who came to live with him because his parents died or were just unfit parents? Alfred isn't all too happy that he's here, but not because he hates him, no, but because Gotham isn't the safest place and the fact that he's bow living with the vigilante family isn't the greatest fact. I feel like Alfred would be very overprotective of his nephew, and just the family's reaction to Alfred's nephew, i feel like the family didn't really ask Alfred about his family and such .
Oh yeah, some Alfred for the soul. That man needs more love. Also, this will be under Batfamily since I'm too lazy to put a new masterlist for Alfred.
Summary: Alfred's nephew comes to live with Bruce and the rest of the fam.
Warnings: child abuse, mentions, mentions of what happened, everyone trying to make sure that (Y/N) is comfortable, Alfred being protective.
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Alfred left the UK and London behind a long time ago. He had his training and career as a soldier and then as a spy. Soon enough, his path led him to the USA, where he got a job as a butler for the Wayne family, even before Bruce was even in the picture. It wasn't really easy to leave his life behind, but Alfred knew it was for the better.
He needed a new beginning after everything he has witness over the years. Especially since his sister cut contact with him. Alfred, while said, he knew he couldn't change her mind in the slightest. But that didn't matter today. What mattered was his new family and his four grandsons and son.
Yes, he did consider Bruce to be his son. After all, he did raise him from when he was 7. And as his four grandsons came along, he was happy.
As far as his old family? Around 13 years ago, his sister had a baby. A boy named (Y/N). Yes, Alfred kept some tabs on his family, just to make sure that everything was like okay back there. Years went by and when (Y/N) was 13, Alfred got a call.
It wasn't a pleasant one.
Alfred sighed as he ended the call, rubbing his temples, muttering a lot of unpleasant things underneath his breath. His nephew (Y/N) was taken out of his sister's custody because she was abusive in every since of the word. And in every shape too.
Starving, beatings... Neglect...
Alfred was really mortified and he could barley speak as he remembered the conversation... He sighed and quickly made his way down to the kitchen opening up the cabinet where he held the strongest drinks in the manor. He poured himself a glass of scotch, since it was the first thing he could see.
I downed the scotch in one sip before pouring himself another one. He sighed yet again, leaning on the kitchen counter, trying not to snap.
" Something happened? " Bruce asked from behind him and Alfred sighed for the third time.
" Well master Bruce... Something did happen. " Alfred said, taking the glass and turning around to face Bruce. Alfred knew that (Y/N) had to come live here... But this family is full of vigilantes... But this is also a safe space too.
" What happened Alfred? " Bruce asked, worried for the man. Alfred is often composed and sarcastic, but now, he was shaken and just... Sad?
" My nephew is in the custody of CPS, well, at least the British version. " Alfred started and Bruce crossed his arms as he leaned on the doorway.
" I didn't know you had a nephew... " Bruce admitted softly and Alfred chuckled, sipping his scotch slowly.
" Yeah... My sister cut contact with me a long time ago master Bruce... " Alfred acknowledged and Bruce nodded, not knowing what to say.
" Either way... I'm the only family he has master Bruce, which means he will have to come here. " Alfred whispered, downing his scotch again.
" That's not a problem Alfred. I'll make space for (Y/N), clear out one room for him and talk to the boys. " Bruce responded and Alfred shook his head, making Bruce frown and tilt his head in confusion.
" That's something I know you would do master Bruce. " Alfred explained and poured himself more scotch. " It's... You are Batman and the danger that comes with that name... I can't bring my nephew into more danger. " Alfred finished explaining and downed the scotch once more.
" It will be different. We will be honest with him. " Bruce said and Alfred did have to agree, they had to be honest with him.
" He will flying here tomorrow master Bruce, so we will need to pick him up. But before hand, we need to talk to the boys. And it will need to be serious. "
" Of course it will be serious Alfred. (Y/N) will feel safe here. And if any boys are out of line, send them to me Alfred. I'll call them down now so we can talk about this. " Bruce said before he went upstairs.
Alfred just finished a bottle in the meantime.
Bruce sat his sons down, telling them that this is very serious.
" Now, listen to Alfred intently. He is officially a lead on this. " Bruce said and sat down. The four boys looked at Alfred, who looked like he wanted to be anywhere but here.
" Well... My nephew is coming here to live with us. His parents, my sister and her husband were abusive to him... Physically, verbally... They starved him too... Either way, he is in a bad mental place. Which means that you four better be on your best behavior. No fights in front of him, both verbal and physical. Don't force him to talk about it and try to befriend him. " Alfred finished, looking at his grandsons with a pointed look.
" Is that all you had to say? " Dick asked and Alfred nodded.
" You have a nephew?! " Jason exclaimed and Alfred nodded.
" Okay, that... I thought you had no family. " Tim said and Alfred sighed and Bruce smiled sadly.
" I thought you were an agent for the MI6 and had no family... Like killed off. " Damian said and Alfred sighed yet again.
" Okay boys, that's enough commentary. " Bruce said and they all grumbled. " It's important that (Y/N) feels safe here. And Alfred has my full permission to put you all back in line. "
" As if he ever needed permission. " Jason mumbled quietly and Dick smacked the back of his head.
" Thank you master Dick. "
" Everyone, this is (Y/N). " Alfred said, introducing his nephew to his grandsons. " (Y/N), these are the infamous Wayne kids. I don't think anymore introduction is needed. " Alfred said, glancing at his shy nephew.
" Now (Y/N), let me lead you to your room. " Alfred said and gently lead (Y/N) to his room. It was one of the bigger ones, with a lot of room and a comfortable bed.
" Now (Y/N), are you hungry? Because it's lunchtime in America at the moment. " Alfred said as (Y/N) put a small suitcase on the bed.
" I could eat something. " (Y/N) said and Alfred nodded, smiling at the fact that (Y/N) would eat something.
" I was thinking about some burgers actually. I can make a good one, with my awesome recipe. Do you want to come down or do you want to stay in your room? " Alfred asked softly.
" I would like to go down... This is a nice place... " (Y/N) said, still nervous.
" I agree it is nice, now come on mate, lets go down. " Alfred said and let (Y/N) go down. Alfred gently led him down to the kitchen and (Y/N) sat down, the boys all around him, keeping some distance, trying to not make him feel overwhelmed.
" So... Is it true that the Queen is a lizard? " Jason asked out of the blue and (Y/N) rolled his eyes at that, but with a smile.
" She passed away. " (Y/N) said and Jason raised his brow.
" No. "
" Yes. "
Jason scoffed with a smile and Alfred listened as he started making the meat mixture for the patties.
" Is it true that people from London speak the best English? " Dick asked and (Y/N) rolled his eyes.
" It's not true. It's so far from the truth... " (Y/N) said and Dick chuckled.
" Well, the royals are there and they must be educated... So how come? " Dick joked and (Y/N) shrugged his shoulders.
" Is it true that gun control is tighter? " Jason asked curiously and (Y/N) nodded.
" Damn... Well, welcome to the land of freedom. " Jason joked and (Y/N) smiled, but it was tiny. Tiny as hell.
" If you hear a bald eagle screeching it means you have reached the peak of staying here. " Tim stated and (Y/N) rolled his eyes a bit.
(Y/N) turned his head when he saw Titus, the Great Dane walking in with his head high and tail wagging at the sight of a newcomer. Damian was ready to intervene if necessary, but Titus was calm with people.
Damian watched as Titus sniffed (Y/N)'s hands, licking them softly and then (Y/N) hesitantly petting him.
" What's his name? " (Y/N) asked, not sure who to ask directly.
" His name is Titus. " Damian answered as he kept watching, tilting his head in wonder.
" Is he yours? " (Y/N) asked as he scratched Titus' ears.
" Yes he is. " Damian answered and (Y/N) moved down his hand to Titus' cheek. " He is huge... " (Y/N) mumbled as he kept patting Titus, who was wagging his tail.
" He is a Great Dane so he is big. " Damian explained and (Y/N) stopped petting him, making Titus whine.
" He is a big baby. " Jason chimed in and Damian nodded.
Alfred put the things he needed aside and checked on (Y/N) and the way he was handling the situation was great. The boys didn't push him, joked about something with him... And (Y/N) was comfortable. That was the most important thing here.
Thankfully, Alfred and Bruce both have experience with sort of traumatized children so (Y/N) will be able to heal properly. And the truth about them being vigilantes... Well, that can wait until (Y/N) is more stable.
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inkedbybarnes · 21 days
Text
well and perfect
bucky barnes x fem!reader
summary: bucky has a surprise for your birthday.
words: 2.3k
warnings: 18+ minors dni. a lotta fluff, but what's new... mentions of insecurity and anxiety if you blink, bucky being a sweetheart that i wish existed, slighteeest hint of implied smut if you blink, usage of petnames such as baby, doll, and sweetheart, lowercase writing.
a request from the lovely @brnesblogposts. happiest 21st birthday to you! i am sorry it took quite long, so i hope i am not late. i tried to write it in a way that would keep it general but sweet, since i don't know much about the reader celebrating and wanted to cater for more people. i hope you like this one and that you have the best birthday ever. thank you for requesting! 🩷
dividers by @cafekitsune!
comments, reblogs, and likes are highly appreciated! thank you. ♡
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“where are you taking me, james?”
only a few specks of light peeked through the piece of cloth that bucky had over your eyes. his argument was that it will keep you and your curiosity away from figuring out his so-called surprise for your birthday.
“it wouldn't be much of a surprise if i answer you, doll.” he chuckled, his fingers brushing your thigh briefly as he drove to this mysterious location.
“but is it really necessary to have me blindfolded?" you complained, tempted to take a peek. “i wanna see you. this isn't fair.”
“nah uh, you're trying to be all cute for me and it's not going to work this time. we're almost there. be patient,” he said, his hand now finding its way up to yours. “keep it on and i swear it'll be worth it. at least, i hope it will.”
you sensed his doubts and worries right away, feeling bad for pressuring him when all he did was make you feel special since you woke up this morning. from bringing you the breakfast in bed of your dreams to showering you with gifts you forgot you mentioned but he completely remembered. oh, and don't forget the cake... the perfect cake you've been drooling over for months!
you assume that you've already been to the place or know the way to it, hence why he had to keep you entirely clueless during the entire ride. not wanting to make him even more nervous, you decided to give up.
“okay, okay. i'll be good and cooperate, i promise.” you squeezed his hand, carefully leaning toward his side to give him a kiss on the cheek, which was a brave decision considering that you were literally blindfolded. “buuut, am i allowed to sing your ears off until we get there?”
“when were you never allowed?” his hand left yours for a moment to turn on the radio, connecting his phone to its bluetooth feature (he thanked technology for that one) and letting the playlist you made play through the speakers. “i know you're bored. so, sing away, sweetheart.”
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the car stopped and probably along with your heart. you knew that this was it. you were finally here, wherever here was, and excitement was an understatement. however, you stayed calm and waited for bucky's confirmation first before reacting.
“i can basically hear your insides shouting,” bucky said as you hear the car door opening. “we're here, baby.”
yes!
“can i take it off now?” you asked quickly. “please, please?”
the car door opened at your side, the rough yet warm chuckle of bucky letting you know he was right beside you. “alright, take 'em off.”
not waiting for another second, you grabbed the cloth away from your eyes and scanned the area. although it took you a few minutes to figure it out, you knew where you were.
“oh my god, we're in brooklyn?” you asked with a gasp, but even more excited now that you were in one of bucky's favourite places in the world.
“yeah, is that okay? i knew you wanted me to give you a better tour around brooklyn, so here it is.” he pressed his fingers into his nape, worried that you might find the entire idea out of place or unfitting for the occasion. “i would've thrown you a party like the team suggested, but i don't.. i don't know how that works yet. i'm not really good at whatever people do for celebrations these days, so i wanted to show you the way i knew it back then but i'm suddenly not sure if you'd like it.”
you could basically hear your heart break as he tried to explain. it hasn't been that long since he had been away from wakanda and pardoned by the government, so he hasn't fully adjusted with the changes that the current generation had. while bucky never paid attention in terms of fitting in, he wanted to fit in your life. little does he know that nobody else could be a better fit.
“no. stop that, bucky. look at me.” you hopped off the car, closing the distance between the two of you. “does it look like i'm sad? disappointed? anything relatively negative?" he shook his head. “exactly, because i'm so excited for what you have planned. you barely even started and i feel like i already won the lottery. so stop worrying, please?”
“i just don't want you to think that i'm being selfish. it's your birthday, you know? it should be about you, but here i am taking you to a place where i grew up in and has nothing to do with you,” he said, his anxiety and insecurity taking over. “but i really thought about this and i.. i just want you to be a part of all of me, even if we were basically from different times. i want you to know that if we were to meet back then, i'd fall for you the same way if not harder, and this is exactly how i'd show you.”
timeless love and devotion.
that was his gift and he thought he was being selfish.
and if it was possible to burst, you probably would've. he didn't even realise how priceless his gift was compared to anything you could've asked for, and yet he felt like he was failing you.
“i love you. so, so much. you know that, right?” you reassured him first, and when he nodded you continued. “i would've enjoyed a party, sure. anything from you would be perfect for me, but a party would most likely just give me a few days of happiness, maybe a memorable memory too, but this.. what you're giving me will last me a lifetime. you don't understand how big this is for me and here you are thinking that you're failing me.”
“i'm not?” he asked, lost in the battle he had within his mind.
“short answer? you basically made me fall in love with you again.”
“really?" his eyes twinkled, as if he was a child being complimented for his scribbles.
you let out a giggle before answering. “yes, now can we start my birthday tour? you made me wait all day, barnes.”
“well, that's no good. can't have my birthday girl waiting," he said, finally smiling. “this way, gorgeous.”
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you spent the entire day visiting his favourite spots. although most of them were already replaced with something else, he still made sure to tell you the stories behind them and how they mattered to him, as well as a few playful scenarios he made that included you and young bucky if you were in the 40s.
he then took you to a restaurant he found fancy and expensive back then, telling you that he remembered saying to himself that he'd only bring a special girl to the restaurant and make her feel special. not being able to help it, you asked if he ever brought a girl there back then.
you were the first one, and he knew you were his last.
on your way to the movie theatre, he didn't forget to show you the alley where he'd always find steve in trouble. you both even took a picture in it to show the team, especially steve, when you get home.
“i feel like a teenager again.”
bucky sat beside you at one of the oldest theatres in brooklyn, the same one bucky used to visit back in the 40s, to watch a movie you've been wanting to see. it was a surprise that it was still up and running, but with its history now being connected to the famous steve rogers and bucky barnes, it was easily a tourist spot.
“you're 107 years old, james. i think you're quite past that stage already.” you reminded him which earned you a sharp glance and a pout.
“what i mean is, this is exactly how i imagined i'd take you out back then. you know, asking you to dinner, going to the theatre to watch a movie we'd completely ignore because i'll be too busy distracting you—”
“distracting me, huh?” you asked, even more intrigued. “how exactly would you distract me? what if i'm really interested in the movie?”
“did i really say that? god, i'm even recklessly acting like a teenager as well.” you watched his cheeks turn into a shade of pink. you raised a brow, prompting him to explain further. “it's dark and we're really close. after all the time and tension we've spent before coming here, i would be desperate to kiss you.”
“james buchanan barnes!” you gasped, a fake and exaggerated one. “those are some bad thoughts you're having, and i thought you were a gentleman.”
“i am, i am!” he exclaimed, failing to hear the playful tone to your words. “i wouldn't even do anything beyond holding someone's hands back then. my ma would put me in a cage if i did anything reckless," he said, shaking his head with a smile at the memory of his mom. “but i played this scenario a thousand times in my head already ever since i met you. i just know you would've made me crazy for you, and you still do.”
you looked into his cool blue eyes, getting lost in them in silence while imagining what your life could've been with him back in the 40s. would've it been different? would've it lasted? would've it been a possibility? is that what he hoped he had?
“you got quiet.” he noticed. “what's going inside that pretty head?”
“you.”
“well, i'm honoured.” he grinned. “tell me about it.”
“i'm just thinking about how it would've been like back then,” you answered. “i kinda wish we met sooner. i think that's what you have wanted instead.”
“you're all that i ever wanted. not the time, not the place, but the person,” he said, kissing your fingers before linking yours and his together. “we may not have met earlier, but i was meant to end up with you. i probably had to go through everything.. that happened, because there was something amazing waiting for me in the end.”
“oh, bucky. don't say that. you deserved none of that. you don't have to go through anything to have me.”
“but it's true, you made it all worth it,” he shrugged. “if i had to go through all of that nightmare again, i would do it in a heartbeat if i'll wake up to this reality.”
“god, you make it impossible for me not to cry.” you sniffed, feeling the dam break at his words. “thank you. not just for this day, but for everything. i wish i could do more to let you know that i love you so much.”
“i love you even more. you're already doing more than i deserve, baby.” he kissed your tears away, then your forehead. “don't cry, that wasn't my plan for your birthday.”
“it's your fault for being so fucking perfect.” you hit his chest softly. “now i am never letting you go.”
“i already made the same decision the moment you told me your name. now, come here.” he pulled you into a hug, letting you cry in his embrace until you notice the silence around you. you looked around and noticed the empty theatre, as well as the rolling credits on the big screen.
“we watched nothing from the movie! they all left!”
“okay, i am definitely guilty for that one. i did say i was going to distract you. i promise to get us another ticket tomorrow and have no distractions.” he laughed, standing up to his feet and offering his hand to you. “let's go? i booked us a room, and i heard their room service is amazing.”
you took his hand and smoothed out your clothes. “something tells me the room service comes exactly from you.”
“oh, i don't know...” he had a sinister smile on his face as you both walked out of the theatre. “you gotta try to find out.”
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you walked hand in hand to the hotel, liking the idea of enjoying the night sky of brooklyn than taking a cab, especially if the hotel wasn't that far away.
all was well and perfect until you felt a cold drop of water land on your cheek.
“wait, is that...” before you could finish your sentence, a downpour suddenly erupted, instantly wetting you both.
“it's raining!” you exclaimed, finding the situation amusing than a way to dampen your mood, remembering how much you adored the rain and the idea of being underneath it with someone you love. “you know, i actually dreamt of being—”
bucky suddenly pulled you close, kissing you under the rain. through your soaked clothes and the raindrops that trickled down your face, he can feel your warm and soft lips pressed against his. it was a perfect moment as the rain continued to pour down, leaving you both soaked, but content.
“wow,” you whispered after. “it was always in my bucket list to get kissed under the rain.”
“i know, i remember.”
your heart skipped a beat. “you remember everything, don't you?”
“everything about you, i do.” he wiped the streaks of rain around your eyes, then down to your lips. “are you happy?”
“so, so happy. you have no idea," you answered, sighing in contentment while your body was pressed against his. “i'm at a point where i feel like none of this is real.”
“believe it, because you have to get used to it.” he smiled, leaning for another kiss. “happy birthday, sweetheart.”
all was indeed well and perfect.
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if you have any requests for bucky, send them my way! 💌
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