#the story of the architects is so interesting and i would love to know more about them/their home and so many people just pretend-

[sleepy-crypt1d]

am i?? losing my mind here??

okay, so, like, subnautica, right?

recent news is that subnautica 3 is in production/in the works, hooray!! literally cannot be more excited about this, it’s my favorite game ever and i am so thrilled to see where the next one is headed but, i feel like, what the next one is going to be about is. . obvious?

who knows!! maybe im losing my mind here and i am just a tad too into these games so other people didn’t think about this but, sub3 is gonna be about the architect home planet. it has to be, doesn’t it?? 

the exact quote from the people working on the game is “I dream of visiting new worlds, exploring intricate alien ecosystems and lost civilizations. I don't think I'll ever get tired of the fantasy of making contact with intelligent life. I also dream about going on these adventures with friends. Getting lost, together.” and people are theorizing that the game takes place either in the past, showing 4546B a thousand years ago, takes place in the crater’s edge, or another unseen part of 4546B but. . .4546B’s story is done? the only loose end there is Ryley, who i would love to see again, but the planet’s mysterious have all been answered? i don’t know how they are coming to those conclusions when BZ perfectly sets up what the next game will be about?

“I dream of visiting new worlds, exploring intricate alien ecosystems and lost civilizations” this??? seems so much like they’re talking about exploring the architect homeworld??? new worlds implies we’re going to a different place, doesn’t it? and lost civilizations, yeah, going through the arc homeworld and piecing together what happened??

“I also dream about going on these adventures with friends. Getting lost, together.” some people are interpreting this as sub3 going multiplayer, which would be okay i guess, but wouldn’t this make more sense if it were referencing Al-An and robin???? especially with the line BZ ends with?? ‘with you, I am ready to face whatever awaits us’ like???

also the second game ended with a cliff hanger!!! it ended with showing us the architect homeworld!!! WHY WOULDN’T SUB3 BE ABOUT THAT???? WHY WOULD THEY SUDDENLY SHIFT THE STORY ENTIRELY??

i dont know, maybe im losing my mind here, maybe theorists on youtube know something i don’t but the plot of sub3 seems obvious to me, because BZ literally ended with showing us where the story was headed.

am i crazy? or have other people also realized that exploring the architect homeworld seems like the only logical next step in the story? to find out what happened? we found out what happened to sam and the game ends with robin promising they’ll find out what happened to the architects. why are people thinking ANYTHING ELSE would happen????

who knows, if sub3 comes out and im completely wrong, i will take that L and dig myself a grave but until then, i will hold this thought pretty confidently 

#subnautica #subnautica below zero #subnautica below zero spoilers #subnautica spoilers #subnautica al-an #is it because they hate BZ :(( it's because they hate BZ isn't it :(( god dammit #sleepy rants #these games are legit my favorite games in existence and BZ meant so fucking much to me - i adored that game!! it was so good!! #not every game needs to be a masterpiece - i had a wonderful time playing it and fell in love with the story/characters #that's all a good game needs #the story of the architects is so interesting and i would love to know more about them/their home and so many people just pretend- #-that they dont exist and it takes away such a big chunk of what makes subnautica the amazing game it is #sorry if i come off as bitchy here- i just care about subnautica a lot and seeing people completely ignore a major part of it sucks #al-an's story is so interesting!!! i love the arcs SO FUCKING MUCH!!! when i saw him for the first time i lost my SHIT #I WANT THE NEXT GAME TO BE ABOUT THE ARCS SO BADLY #TELL ME MORE ABOUT THEM #PLEASE #like i cannot tell if these people are willfully being ignorant to basic story telling mechanics or if they just. . . dont get it #it ended on a cliff hanger- the next game will be explaining that cliff hanger? #like sure we didn't get an answer to what happened to ryley word for word but we KNOW that alterra is pretending he doesn't exist!! #we know- in part- what happened to him- that's why it isn't answered #we find logs talking about how the aurora 'disappeared' #with no survivors #alterra is hiding his existence #also WE NOW HE'S IN SPACE- MYSTERY THERE SOLVED #SPACE #BUT WITH THE ARCS WE DON'T KNOW!! #WHY WOULD THEY SET UP AN ENTIRE GAME WITH THE MYSTERY OF TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENED TO THE ARCS AND THEN JUST DROP IT??????? #WHY DO THEY THINK THAT UW WOULD DO THAT??? #angry

[transhoverfish]

OK SO IM LATE BUT. MORE SUB3 NEWS!!!

so a few days ago, krafton (their publisher), apparently had this like presentation of their plans over the next like 2 years. and during that they talked a bit about sub 3!

and this obviously creates a LOT of questions. not to worry, though, because unknown worlds added on to this:

im honestly not surprised by this. iirc, when below zero released they said it would be a WHILE before the next game, and they only announced this back in like... january? now, the first game's release was in january, and bz was in may, so it's definitely possible early access with be in spring of 2025. those games did not have multiplayer aspections tho! its possible we'll wait until mid 2025, and full release will likely not be until 2026. but who knows? the first game took like ten to be fully finished!!

and honestly. THANK GOD. i can't imagine any subnautica game having BATTLE PASSES or LOOT BOXES. i would have just straight up ignored this game 😭

i do wonder what these updates will entail! "many years to come" is definitely something interesting to me, because other than bug fixes... i dont remember sub or bz getting many updates post full release. is this referring to bug fixes, or is it implying that it will be in a state of early access for much longer? are they going to just keep adding new things (like the building update for sub1) and taking fandom suggestions? very interested!!

maybe this is an unpopular opinion, but i actually,,,, dont want multiplayer. now i do like bz, and these games arent really intended to be horror games, but also bz is very noticeablely less scary than sub1. and some of it i think definitely has to do with all the extra characters and dialogue. its hard to feel isolated when you know al-an and marg are nearby. so im very happy that it's optional, bc i know i will probably enjoy single player a lot more enjoyable!!

so now... SPECULATION.

so the first thing im curious about that the development team didnt mention:

"uncover the mysteries on an entirely new alien planet"

apprently we are NOT returning to 4546b. which im kind of sad about!! ik the story is very obviously done there, but it feels weird that its going to be some other planet this time around. THERE WONT BE PEEPERS!!!! (well there could be but it would be weird if some other random planet had the exact same lifeforms)

now my next immediate thought is: is this a direct continuation of below zero? my opinion is: no. probably not.

mostly because it mentions up to four players, and robin and alan are, if you look very closely, only two people. now they COULD just create two new characters to go alongside them (my fanfic brain loves the au idea of marg and ryley 🥺) but im just going to assume that with the addition of a new planet, we're going to drop the old storylines. which means no more degasi, sunbeam, aurora, or ayou sisters. we might move away from architects/precursors altogether! (my basis on this is absolutely nothing and i could be wrong, this is 100% just theorizing)

also, i imagine that it would be difficult to keep the plot the exact same with two established characters and then two new ones, depending on how this multiplayer aspect works. if its another crash, it would be a lot easier to just have the extra players die/survive, then try to work in a balancing act of one guy playing al-an.

(also i like keeping the ending of bz vauge. if they show up again, they would have to mention what happened to the rest of the architects, and i think it's much more fun if thats a mystery!)

((also also, im gonna drop a bomb on u all for a second. i actually,,, dont like al-an. i have a deeper connection to probably every single other character in bz. i think they really fumbled al's character and story and he is so incredibly bland to me. it feels like they go nowhere with how he was responsible for the kharra outbreak because the game ends immediately after he confesses! it would be nice to give him another chance, sure, but i personally dread the idea of even more al-an. sorry everyone for this horrible news))

HERE'S A CONCEPT IMAGE

i hope they bring back some cut content creatures for this!! i noticed this new area looks VERY similar to the safe shallows, and several of the fish seem to be variations of ones we've already seen (im already seeing bladderfish and hoopfish color pallettes, and the shark resmbles some early concept art for the shadow leviathan, but with the ice worm's colors...)

will there be more land areas?? is it going to entirely underwater?? more kharra?? NO DISEASE AT ALL?? AAAAAA!!!!

#so excited so excited SO EXCITED #sub 3 news #undescribed

[robins-egg-bindery]

ever in your favor by @iron--spider

Peter startles awake when someone shakes him. 

“Sorry, honey,” May says. Peter blinks a couple times and she comes into focus, her hair pulled back from her face. She’s trying not to look a certain way, but he can see it in her eyes anyway. She clears her throat, keeps talking. “But it’s…” She glances away, wets her lips. “You gotta get ready.”

He remembers what day it is, and his heart beats like a drum at someone’s execution. But he tries to put on a mask, make it all seem normal. It’s everything but, despite the fact that he’s been dealing with reaping day since he was born, between himself, Ben and May. That fear that one of them could be taken away. Sent to surefire slaughter. But now Ben is gone, taken despite never having his name drawn from a bowl, and May’s finally safe. Now Peter’s name is in there alone. The last Parker sitting on the chopping block. He doesn’t know how to be. He doesn’t know what normal is, when the Hunger Games are looming on the horizon.

fic by @iron--spider

art by @angel-gidget

624 pages / 153,984 words

Title Font: PP Hatton, Rustic Printed

Body Fonts: Californian FB, Moonglade, Bebas Neue, War Is Over, Architects Daughter

More on the process below the cut!

I have...SO much to say about this project! This fic was one that I've wanted to do ever since I started fanbinding, and it was one I saved until my technical skills caught up with my vision for the book. @iron--spider is my favorite author and a wonderful friend, and I wanted to be able to do this masterwork justice!

Given that it's a Hunger Games AU, I wanted to touch on the Hunger Games aesthetic while still being unique. I started with the cover; I knew I wanted red and yellow, something bold and evocative of the Iron Man, Spiderman vibe. It also doubles as an implication of the blood spilt during the games, especially in volume II - when Peter actually enters the games. I chose the spider for the cover, and painted it on the cover paper with inky black paint; I cut a stencil, and while the images did have some drippy areas, I don't mind it so much. It's meant to look like graffiti, Peter's symbol that the people of the Districts scrawl everywhere they can get away with it.

In turn, I also experimented with a paint pen on this one of the titling, done on the spine piece, which is black Better Than Goat leather! Again, I went in with a stencil, and opted for blockier letters, like something you might see spray painted onto a wall.

The endpapers are custom; I messed around with a weird cityscape I found and came out with the image you see above. The setting for the games is a futuristic city, much like MCU NYC would be, complete with an Avengers Stane tower.

And then of course, there's the typeset itself! The Hunger Games books don't have particularly striking typesets, but I did go for the dystopian vibe with the Rustic Printed font on the chapter numbers, and Moonglade for the chapter titles, giving it a very industrial feel.

It was also a pleasure to include the art that @angel-gidget did for the fic as well! Her book covers are so gorgeous and I love her manip style so much <3 I also included the short drabble @iron--spider did on her Tumblr, a post-story snack-sized fic, as well as a meta question she answered via her asks that I thought was particularly interesting. The District guide at the back, including what Districts each character belongs to and whether or not they are deceased was interesting to put together, and I hope I didn't make any mistakes!

Last, but certainly not least, this book was the first one I was able to do really nice headbands on. Shoutout to @morningstarbindery who helped me learn how! They look phenomenal and I never would have figured it out on my own <3

I'm excited for everyone to see these books! One day I'll have all your works on my shelf ;)

#fanficbinding #fanfiction #fanfic #fanfic bookbinding #fanfic binding #fanbinding #fanfiction bookbinding #ficbinding #fic binding #fanficbookbinding #renegadepublishing #me myself and i #marvel #irondad #irondad and spiderson #spiderson #spiderman #peter parker #mcu #tony stark #iron man

[felassan]

A few more snippets of interest and insight from Mark Darrah, from an older Mark Darrah on Games YouTube video where he was livestreaming playing Dragon Age: Origins some months ago -

Chat asked "Why are there no Desire Demons in DA:I?". Mark said "I think they need a visual redesign and there wasn't time for them, and they're not, they require a combat rethink in terms of how they're used in combat, and a visual redesign, so it was basically just de-prioritized."

[please note this video streamed 4 months ago] "I'm not worried about DA:D not having been at TGA 2022. I mean they're doing it probably because they don't wanna date themselves. Their earliest launch date would basically be end of this year [2023], so it's rational for them not to be at TGA 2022. I assumed they would be mainly because of just the way the marketing campaign has gone, but the fact that they aren't is actually a strong signal that they've decided to regain control of their marketing campaign, which is actually probably smart. Yeah, they're not out of beta yet." Chat commented here "I'm kinda relieved to hear that because I was afraid they would push the game beyond Q4 24." Mark said, "No I don't think so. For them to go to TGA 2022 would have meant having full gameplay and they probably just didn't wanna polish it up. I should've clued in when they released a whole cutscene from the game on DA Day 2022 that they weren't gonna be at TGA 2022. That was a pretty strong signal. For them to do both wouldn't have been. There's no way that Geoff Keighley was gonna let them put that cinematic trailer on the stage at TGA 2022. So what they have is this sort've, too little for TGA 2022 but it's a big drop for DA Day, so that was the thing that I missed."

[following on from the previous point, and when chat was discussing feeling drip-fed] "It's just, I mean, for reasons that make sense for the project but less sense for the marketing. DA:D has been announced for a very long time. You wouldn't voluntarily announce a game so early if you didn't have external reasons. Also, harder to cancel an announced game."

"Cullen's story is done in DA:I."

"We've recast people before, for sure"

Chat said "I feel like DA fans have this tendency to cling extremely tightly to existing characters. Like, there will be a ton of characters introduced in DA:D that we will fall in love with, and not really miss people from previous games." Mark replied, "Yeah, you're right about that. That's exactly what happens, is people want stories with the characters that they know to continue but once they feel that they've seen new characters then they're a lot less concerned."

"I mean the general rule is, you don't bring back followers who are romances or who could be dead. So Cullen kind of doesn't meet any of the criteria for coming back. The quantum on DAII characters is really high. I guess there are a lot that don't die, but."

"My feeling on Absolution, I think everyone else is a bit too under-played and Qwydion is a bit too over-played. If you like brought her done one notch and everyone else up one notch it would be okay. But yeah, she does stick out a little bit for sure."

Chat asked "Was there any thought given to bereskarn in DA:I?" Mark replied, "I think the problem is the artists don't really like the visual design of bereskarn. I think there's a cool model to be had there, but they just don't have it at the moment. I think there's a general desire to move away from just generic wilderness creatures as combatants, like wolves and bears and stuff, so maybe they'll make a reappearance."

Chat asked "Who does everyone think the 'default' Divine is?" Mark said "Interesting question, I don't know."

Chat asked "Do you think that the Architect will make an appearance in DA:D?" Mark replied, "I don't suspect, I think they'll let the Architect just be, the place for the Architect to appear was DA:I, I don't think he will appear in DA:D. I think the reason why he doesn't appear in DA:I is because he could be dead." Chat commented, "Wouldn't he have the same powers as Corypheus though, and just come back?" Mark replied "Well that's true, that's a good point. I don't know that we established that by then or not but I don't know, maybe. He could've linked himself to a, could've been body-hopping."

Chat asked "Do you see DA continuing as a franchise after DA:D?" Mark replied, "Oh yeah, I don't think they're done with DA."

Chat said "We saw Hira in Absolution using a flying magic disc. Do you think they will implement that in DA:D as a new form of magic?" Mark said "Yeah, I don't know. It was interesting because when Hira uses it the first time she uses it to lift someone else, which is sort've how I imagined it working, but then she actually flies with it later. I don't know if that was just poetic license given to the anime creators or if it's an actual plan for going forward. It's definitely presented as quite an awkward way to fly."

[source]

He also talked more generally about DA:O and the franchise and things in general. These bits are collected under a cut due to length -

"I think you can always see the Black City in the Fade, I think that's been said/is correct"

"I like that in DAII the darkspawn have a consistent visual. They don't in DA:O. So I'm pro-that. A lot of the darkspawn in DA:O have like orc plus zombie equals question mark"

"They did lose the grab animation from enemies in DAII. I don't think DAII had any sync animations"

"Stun on the player is not a fun ability. It's not so bad if you have a party fully controlled by the player (you can switch to another party member to try and break it) but only one party member, it's not fun for sure. You definitely need some sort of range attack otherwise you just end up kiting like the Arishok fight in DAII"

"DA does have a tendency to use the Pride demon model as 'generic high tier demon'

"I don't regret putting Cullein in DA:I , the characters are not their voice actors"

"Oghren is kind of a caricature in Awakening"

"Lore in DA is always presented through someone's interpretation"

"In Awakening the Children don't really fit in with the rest of the design up until this point"

"The official response to Leliana's death retcon in DA:I is that the only way Leliana can die in DA:O is at the Urn of Sacred Ashes, so the Urn brought her back. The only way she dies is a weird, specific choice, you're making a choice if you kill her in DA:O for sure. It's not a common choice. Desecrating the Urn doesn't make any sense, I don't think there's a rationale given for why you do that. I can see 'destroy it' but I don't know why in the world you would desecrate it so. Very few people are able to, Renegade in Mass Effect is actually not widely chosen"

"Golems of Amgarrak DLC is there to [just] be there [basically]. Most of the DLC in DA:O doesn't have any particular goals. It was just to make DLC. Like Leliana's Song doesn't really expand Leliana very much. Darkspawn Chronicles is just kind've a fun thing to exist. In DA:O DLC was pretty much still a new concept, at least big pieces of DLC. So kind've trying to figure out what people wanted"

"Awakening is an old-school expansion pack in a time when expansion packs are gone basically. So that's why it feels so big"

Chat asked, "As Executive Producer, did you have any say on the story and direction of the lore?" Mark said "I'm always involved in that kind of stuff, I'm not the one dictating lore but I'm influencing it for sure"

Chat asked "Any chance of the DA tactics game actually being made at this point?" Mark replied "There was not really any chance of a DA tactics game being made. It's pretty antithetical to everything EA believes in"

Chat mentioned that golems in Awakening lack a 'gap closer' move. Mark said "that's why they got chucking rocks in later games"

"Strategy guides used to be a big money maker for games. Not so much anymore"

"The models got new bones in DAII"

Chat asked "Is there a reason why the Legion of the Dead don't automatically just join up with the Wardens?" Mark said "Politics I guess"

[source]

(pls note that in places there is a bit of paraphrasing of the info, the best source is always the primary source with full quotes in their original context)

#dragon age: dreadwolf #dragon age 4 #the dread wolf rises #da4 #dragon age #bioware #video games #greg ellis mention #long post #longpost #dragon age: absolution #dragon age: absolution spoilers #mass effect

[camlannpod]

hi I’m the person who asked about character creation advice in the listen along stream. My internet went funny so sorry I couldn’t specify on stream!

I meant characters in general! I really want to get into writing stories (books, podcasts, film, I haven’t really decided yet) but I’m struggling a bit with fleshing out my characters and I often feel like they’re all kind of the same person.

I really love the characters in Camlann so advice would be great!

Hi hello! Thank you so much for joining us for the stream, I'm sorry for your internet difficulties!!

Hm, this is an interesting and tricky question which I want to preface with a quick disclaimer:

Everyone writes differently. There's no one correct way to write, and whilst there are tool sthat you can use for writing - just like there are tools in visual art and music, learning which tools you want to use and how you want to use them is, I think, a big part of learning how to write well and in a way that's enjoyable for you.

This said! People often make jokes / comments about 'plotters vs pantsers' or 'architects vs gardeners'. A lot of writers fall into one of two categories - meticulously plotting detail before writing, or just kind of going with the flow. I personally am very much in the latter category, so I'm afraid I don't have a lot of specific tools or exercises I can give you.

This said, I'm going to do my best. Ursula K Le Guin is, in my opinion, one of the best writers of the 20th century, and she writes a lot of wonderful essays about the imagination and writing which I find really inspiring. I'm paraphrasing because I can't find the quote, but she once said something along the lines of: "If I can't close my eyes and have a conversation with a character, then I'm not ready to write their story yet."

That's a lot how I feel about writing characters. Some of it is conscious. I identify traits - flaws, strengths, quirks - in myself and others, and I give them to my characters. Dai is hyperactive and excitable because I'm hyperactive and excitable. Perry infodumps because I infodump. Morgan is stressed and protective because I am both of those things. But they also all have elements I don't have - Morgan is a lot more understated and pragmatic than I am. Dai is much more confident and reckless. Perry is significantly more organised and self-disciplined.

As a rule, I personally find it best to avoid ever trying to write 1 for 1 either yourself or a friend into a character. That way lies hurt feelings and honestly an inability to see them clearly, because it's very hard to see yourself objectively. Instead, I think of it like putting puzzle pieces together, or a patchwork quilt, or planting seeds. People often say good writers are good eavesdroppers. Phrases that people say on the tram stick with me. Strangers in shops. People dancing. Expressions and ways of speaking that filter through to characters I write.

Once I've identified a small handful of key pieces, I leave them to grow in my subconscious. This normally takes a few months. It's like...moulding a piece of wet clay for a few hours - ok, I don't want them to be X, I do need them to do Y - and once you've got roughly what you want in the right places, putting it in the kiln that is your mind and letting it cook. I just...think about my characters a lot - daydream about them, imagine them in different situations etc. Once I feel they've had enough time to settle, I start writing.

I honestly find one of the best ways to get to know a character is just writing them. For me that always feels like a conversation. And not just writing - editing and rewriting and rewriting - learning what they would or wouldn't say, thinking about how they'd react in different situations etc. There are...minimum 7 drafts of the Camlann scripts? I got to know the gang better just because I spent a lot of time with them.

Finally, for audio specifically, always always read your scripts aloud! If you can, rope in a friend or two. The way people speak out loud and the way they speak in our heads when we're reading is very different. Something that's incredibly moving in prose can feel awkward and stilted in audio. So read it out loud - start getting a sense of your character's vernacular. Do they say 'don't' or 'do not'? Do they swear? Do they use slang? Are they flirty, shy? I always find that my characters start coming to life when I can hear their voices. If I can hear them speaking to me, they're ready to be written.

This is all a little wibbly wobbly, and very personal to me, but I hope it at least helps you think about how you want to write. Good luck, and have fun!

#question this #thatdamhobbit

[homoirrealis]

Lunar Hilton - inspiration for Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino

As the Russians had launched Sputnik in October of 1957, kicking off the Space Age - a period of tremendous fear and wide-eyed hope for what was to come... One of those was Hotel on the Moon... In 1967, Barron Hilton told the Wall Street Journal that he anticipated opening a hotel on the Moon within his lifetime. In the article, he described the Lunar Hilton as a 100-room hotel that would be built below the surface. Guests would gather around a piano bar in an observation dome that allowed them to gaze back at Earth. "So when you gaze at planet Earth from outer space" Arctic Monkeys - American Sports

The hotel group even printed “reservations cards” and hotel keys which were distributed as promotional items in Hilton hotels.

This idea got caught up in popular culture - the reference to a "Hilton Space Station 5" in Stanley Kubrick's 1968 masterpiece 2001: A Space Odyssey. "I told you about that room with the piano in LA, right? At my place we call that room The Lunar Surface. It’s from that rumour how Stanley Kubrick just staged the whole moon landing in his basement. Every time I sat down to work on songs in my basement, I thought: he’s gonna come down to fake the moon landing any time now. That’s how the moon entered the story. And the calm, thanks to an Apollo mission." - Alex Turner

How does it connect to TBHC?

"....I had already thought about what the album was gonna be called: The Tranquility Base Hotel + Casino. It’s a place on the moon. I fantasised about writing a commercial text for a hotel and casino on the moon. In that case, ‘The Star Treatment’ would have been the ultimate slogan! I can already visualise the commercial in my head. I love those commercial visuals for hi-fi devices from the 70s. Highlighted just like that, accompanied by neon lettering. Yeah, if I had to create and advertisement for a hotel, I would definitely put ‘Star Treatment’ in there. But it also comes from a different place. " [x]

The album's artwork was designed by Alex Turner using cardboard cut-outs. He began by drawing a hexagon, to reflect the band's sixth studio album, eventually drawing influence from architects Eero Saarinen and John Lautner, becoming "quite consumed" by the process. The artwork was initially inspired by a photograph depicting the set for a Lunar Hilton hotel being built for 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968).

"In the past I've definitely had record covers that don't, to me, represent what's on the wax, and I certainly don't feel that way about this one. By the end of it, I think I'd forgotten there even was a record. I'd just gotten obsessed with cardboard."

Interestingly, he has referred to architecture a few times, namely in this interview in 2013, talking about the same architects (Marvin Goody, John Lautner) [min 14:40]. He is definitely knowledgeable/interested in it, and has been since 2013... If you know more of these references, let me know!

#homoirrealis #alex turner #arctic monkeys #tbhc #lunar hilton #hilton #lunar #Youtube

[i-bring-crack]

You know its stupid that Woo Jin Chul vividly remembers everything about Jin Woo by just a single touch, without having Jin Woo giving his memories to him.

You know

Like a literal trope in romance movies about soulmates or start crossed lovers.

But Cha Hae In is endgame

okay.

This is mostly just sour thoughts about Cha Hae In not being given enough development, cuz there could have been, literally, like: Hunters guild, Jeju, Kartenon, Monarchs arc, final arc— but they never expand on her AHGGHGH—

Hunter's guild: Oh she is recognized as the strongest there? even far more than the ultimate soldier and almost as much as The chairman, she has a strong sense of smell (but you know, that is literally just to have a reason for Cha to be interested in Jin Woo... literally nothing else.) She is a swordsmaster that is connected to Song Chi Yul, her skills are so good Sung couldnt even sense her when they met?

And what do they do woth her?

Oh look she is going to save her guildmates who could have died instatly! By using a pickaxe, hahah oh how funny!

Jeju island: oh she is actually far stronger than the japanese s ranks and— welp only one, and there she goes being saved by Jin Woo again bc you know, damsel in distress is like the number one trope that Solo leveling uses it in every single chapter like its crack.

Oh but look she has defeated the Ant Queen! Only to be overshadowed, quite literally, by the fight between Sung and Beru [which i have nothing against, the very was awesome but seriously, the one time she wins and she is just thrown back again to damsel in distress COME ON!]

Kartenon: oh look the architect is judging her moves and actually saying that she might be able to go outside the system... whatever it means but it looks like she might surpass something —i even have pictures hold on.

And they do nothing with it again.

In fact they just slap that down hard and say that she is still going by the systems rules so yada yada, she gets hurt and Jin woo has to save everyone again.

Monarchs arc: Nope nope nope, literally just a date definetly couldnt have explored the situation more by you know, having Jin Woo open up about his dad passing away (which the novel did grant a little more of that) and Cha Hae In comforting him because Jin Woo sees Cha Hae In as his first friend and they definetly could have build that shit up to something more.

BUT NOPE!

Last arc: I wont even try to explain just how overly sour the ending was for me. One of the strongest girls in the series, the olympic athelete, the S rank that fought her trauma whilst facing Beru... gets turned into a housewife.

Horray.

It would bave been better if Cha Hae In seemed even the tiniest interested in being a housewife, bc i do love me some characters who can kick ass while also mainting a good homelife without the need of anyone else, but no. She wanted to be an athlete, and now she is like a mother with wife duties. Thats it, i didnt know if she quit ... eh she didnt seem to look like it so, thankfully, but like, come one that was a sudden 180.

Of all people, I want her to have had more character than anyone. Not just because she is the love interest (but that also should be added ngl) but because she is one of the few S rank women that we see in the story (and lives, sorry japan). She is also the strongest of all Korea, actively working as a hunter unlike Go Gun Hee who was at the same time a ruler's vessel. A freaking vessel! Not to mention that cha hae in was everything Jin Woo wasnt at first, it was everything he was trying to become: rich enough to afford his mother's bills, powerful, strong, brave enough to fight any monster and protect everyone he cared about. They were so different and yet the same in their own grounded way.

But yes, butcher another character why not.

#cha hae in #sung jinwoo #sung jin woo #shadows monarch #architect sl #solo leveling spoilers #solo leveling manwha #solo leveling

[caffernnn]

Free! Anniversary Fic Recs 🦋🐋🐬🦈🐧 Can you share your fav fics from each year (2013-2023) Free! has been around?

This is a very fun ask!! Lemme root through my bookmarks and see what I can find 😅

2013 - A lot of the stories I have saved from this time are shorter lil one-shots like “Never Leave” by Shimegami (classic mh hug-it-out interlude fic) and “The Sound of Settling” by teke (feelings realization stuff), but one other one I liked was “The Ocean You Gave My Heart” by miaoujones. Smut warning for that one (if that’s not your thing), but something about desert-bound Makoto learning to swim and indulge in water with Haru, thinking upon meeting him that he’s a wonder whether he’s really a mermaid or not, that’s neat!!

2014 - starting to realize the ones I kept any note of from the early years are some of the popular mh fics probably already recommended 10 times over, but there’s a reason why people sing their praises. If you haven’t checked out fics from tide tothemoon like 2/13189000 (mhtokyo my beloved), their writing is *chef’s kiss* delightful. Another AU I haven’t been able to bring myself to revisit was orihime’s reincarnation stories from “I cannot be without you, matter of fact.” There are two different stories, one where Makoto remembers their past lives and a follow up where Haru remembers, and oh that made me ache dude.

2015 - Speaking of suffering, have y’all checked out Heart’s Departure yet? I think we’ve referenced and talked about that story enough for it to speak for itself 🥴 heartbreaking circumstances but still cosmic and so so beautiful. Then, once you’re done crying about that story, hop over to “Shake the Heavens” by Ad_Astra to break down over (what I described in my ao3 bookmark) Makoto and Haru’s “inherently cataclysmic devotion.” I guess 2015 was the year of shoving the boys into tragic AUs and seeing how much they were willing to give up to get back to each other. A whole vibe

2016 - let’s goooo gamers, more AUs!! “I’d Create Oceans For You” by trashness is a fun fantasy adventure that has both tender moments and interesting action (and some banger art from donguris omggg). If you want something more future-fish-flavored that shows that happily-ever-after doesn’t save you from your grief, “Sublimation” by RedScribbler was great. You can find more of my thoughts on that one if you scroll back a bit in my “fic recs” tag — one of y’all sent it in and yeeees it was so up my alley!

2017 - Alright fellas, there are so many to choose from, because now we’re getting into the macbetha years! Who would I be if I didn’t mention “Eyes Wide Open All The Time” tbh?? It’s a long one with its own hard-hitting involved lore and world-building, but Beth builds this unique story in a way that pulls from the characters we know and love so effectively. I’ve sung the praises for this story multiple times (and could so do it again bro don’t tempt me) but I’ll end off with saying that if you’re fascinated in watching deeply-wounded people who’ve been put through hell learn how to make a life in the aftermath, there’s something special for you here. Aaaand, if you want something about 1/10 the length and not as heavy, “159 (Architect/Interior Designer AU)” by intoxicatedcinnamon has some fun moments 😌 that’s another one where you can find more of my thoughts somewhere in the fic recs tag (love when y’all send me stories 💚💙)

2018 - “Coral and Bone” by Macbetha my beloved!!!! Wanna play mermaids and fight the gods? Maybe try to find that summer magic that makes you want to keep going and accidentally fall in love on the way? I am puuushing you toward this story bestie. Everyone’s here and everyone’s having fun! OH ALSO I’m throwing in “Night Changes” by SEMellark because I love stories where Makoto and Haru actually figure out how to talk to each other. (Side note — a lot of these are probably gonna be things I’ve rec’d in the past, so feel free to scroll my tag for more details and consider this list an extra endorsement 😅)

2019 - (drops basket full of love for mutuals) OOPS OOPS OOPS!!! Don’t mind me, just popping in with some “Let’s Get Married” by sagesprouts and “Anthropocene” by testosterogna, nothing to see here but some classic natsunao shenanigans and one of the sickest elemental bender AUs out there 😌✨ I also have some fics from Svana saved from this year, but I’ll be mentioning her again later so hold on okay!!

2020 - alright, now the list is getting longer with everyone jumping back in during the early pandemic days 🏃🏻‍♀️SO FIRST OFF “green eyes, you’re the one I wanted to find” by infinite_always is an absolute FLUFF FEST of a soulmate AU! Unbearably tender moments but who doesn’t love that every so often? OH AND we have another one of my all-time ultimate fic recs here!! “Reaching” by CupNoodles55 has shaped and reshaped how I look back at Eternal Summer in the way I’d want any great canon-compliant fic to. Big love for interlude scenes and extra bits that help recontextualize or deepen what a moment could’ve meant in the show. Gonna end off 2020 with “The Sea Aflame” by Dizzydodo because even though this urban fantasy story is unfinished, I was super drawn in by the prospects of dragon!Makoto and whatever god stuff was going on with Sousuke. An interesting universe I love thinking about again from time to time.

2021 - Starting off strong with “love on the water, love underwater (and so on)” by rudimentaryflair because we love introspection here!!! Lovely writing style with lines that make me want to scale the walls. This take on Makoto is so so special. Also gonna rec “To Clear Away Today” by suhmayzooka (omg hiiii) if you want to be thrown into another hard-hitting intricate AU with loads of potential. Love exploring what we’ve got to see of the world so far 💞 and OOOH IT’S TIME!! “Extraordinary” by Svana_Vrika is basically canon to me at this point. Svana has a lot of sweet shorter stories with Makoto and Haru (look here, look here), but this one is everythinggg my guy. Similar appeal to “Reaching” mentioned earlier: a story of interludes that bring the story we already know to life in a delightful new way. Required reading for mhtokyo fans forreal. ONE LAST ONE OKAY!! “Teacher” by VeloxVoid is a great future fic with teacher!Makoto and artist!Haru (and I’m not biased just bc it was a gift exchange for me with details fit to my specific tastes wdym🧍🏻). Domestic blisssss

2022 - Ooh we’ve almost caught up y’all ☺️ gonna start with “All This and Heaven Too” by SocksAreArgyle because sometimes the bestie crafts a smorgasbord of smut with a delicious throughline of character/relationship development baked in. If you want your choice of spicy makoharus or some character exploration, you’re SET with this one. Next is “I Let My Heart Go” by martincrieff because sometimes the bestie looks at poor pining Makoto and goes “you know what would be messed up?” AND I JUST !!! So full of love and now full of flower petals. Hanahaki!Makoto my dearest boy!! Aaaand ending off the year with some tender mh (to Ikuya’s detriment) in “The Night Train” by Lizzyboo. They’re so softtt with each other and UGH this story is so nice. Love watching people take the crumbs from FS/FS2 and make a meal 💜

2023 - The year is young! And old! So here’s some more, with who knows how many bangers yet to come 🎉 First going to throw in the Makoharu Week 2023 collection for your perusal because I saw some fantastic stories emerge from that event. If you have twitter, I’d recommend also seeing some of the threadfics posted over there from the event as well 💚💙 and I thiiink I’m gonna close off for now with “just like it was always meant to be” by tonfea because they’ve been putting out banger stories that deserve all the love. Haru introspection is one of those things that isn’t always done very well (which is especially hard to reckon with in older fics) but tonfea’s stories all have an intimate understanding about Haru’s mind and journey that just makes sense.

Alright hello we made it to the end!!! Might’ve thrown in more than expected but I hope makoharu enjoyers find something on this list that fits their fancy 🥲 (and if anyone wants to rec something or ramble about a story here that they loved I’m all ears)

#fic recs #makoharu #oops all makoharu #a wonderful stroll through the past decade #(also I didn’t tag people but quite a few of the people I mentioned are here so uhh hiiiiii) #thanks for sending <3 #anonymous

[angrycloudloud]

Percy Jackson spoilers episode 8

I'm not joking, i commented everything.

(i'm putting the episode in pause to write everything... So i don't have to do 10000 posts about this episode, so if you are reading this, hold your horses because this is going to be a long post (probably) not edited, from a person watching this in Europe starting to watch this at 3:11 am... And English is not my first language, so...sorry before hand)

LUKE!!! LUKE TALKING?! REALLY?! LIKE... COME ON!!! Don't do this to me... Not me vibing with the foreshadowing just in the begining of the episode.

THOSE WHO WENT ALL "WUAHHH WHERE'S THE TRAING LESSON FROM LUKE?" HERE IT IS!!! YOU REALLY THOUGHT THEY WON'T SHOW IT BEFORE MAKING PERCY FIGHT A GOD?! (I mean, they could have...but come on!... That would have being insane and would have make Percy to op and this works perfectly to remind us the "bond" between Percy and Luke at camp, just before what readers knew It was going to happen)

Oh~ i love the Ares doesn't take well that others think he can't have a single original thought... But i LOVE more that he literally decided to go with the "say hi to your mommy for me" like... Ares my man, god of war, sir... You fucked up so badly with just that... That kid is going to make Hephaestus and his chain-net over you and Aphrodite look like a fun story after Percy "son of Sally" Jackson finish humilliate you.

Aaaaand we got golden Blood + enemy for Life (Where's the curse, sir? Where's the "your sword will fail you when you most need it"?)

Uh! Pretty helmet~ I said it before, and i repeat myself, Hades has good taste in art.

I like the "the last war on olympus caused wwii" and not like the book, i like It better this way, like "everything is the gods fault" because It is. (I'm sure Luke will comment this at some point)

Also, Annabeth clueless because she wasn't there... I'm like, yeah, it's the one of the trio that could catch up just by context, she IS the wise girl after all.

THE NECKLACE WITH HER FATHER'S RING!!! OMG!!!! ANNABETH, DARLING, DEAR... I LOVE THIS, SO MUCH.

(Leah is Annabeth, look at her!!! If someone says something bad about her acting just because their racism... i hope Apollo write their names in the plague list or the bad music for the rest of their lifes one... I hope there's a list for that)

Grover: e-mail? Maybe?

Percy: *nah, it's time those gods know what they are dealing with* what's the Glory on that?

(Walter, dear boy, your face in that moment...perfect Percy moment just there)

OH MY GODS!!! I NEED A TOUR IN THAT OLYMPUS!!! but again...WHY THE FUCKING ARCHES?!?!?!

Okay... Hold on! HOLD ON!!! THEY DID A THING HERE I THINK COULD EXPLAIN THE FUCKING ARCHES...THE ARCHERS MIGHT NOT GIVE ME NIGHTMARES.

(Look behind, there are temples with easter asian architecture and i spot a building that reminds me a bit of Santa Sofia or Saint Peter of the Vatican... So... Maybe they are implying that not only the greek gods are chilling there in olympus? That could be interesting.)

Luke, i'm seeing you...

WoW!! Wooooo!!! Not the Annabeth IS terrify of spiders coming now and from him, Luke himself, just to say "hey! Demigods are small but if the gods thinks you are scary they'll kill you" GODS they are MAKING Luke soooo much justice, like, he needs to be like this if they didn't portrait him like this "big brother figure" it would be incomprehensible that so many Demigods will follow him. He IS a leader. He IS reliable.

Seriously, i'm in LOVE with all that Big city vibe of the olympus... Like... I Understand why Annabeth wants to be architect after seeing all that. (Disney, you better give us something good in the 5th season, and i have high hopes for the laberinth after seeing this)

I'm so sad about the death of Zeus actor... I'm liking a lot how he is acting Zeus, like a fucking CEO know-it-all Who thinks Percy is wasting his time saying things he already know but doesn't want to believe yet. "I will not be weaken by my brothers" darling, Zeus, that's the youngest brother part of you speaking. Shut the fuck up and listen to the kid.

Percy speaks facts.

Oh!!! Daddy Ken, i mean, Poseidon is here, protecting his kid~. (Better solution than turning him into a tree, actually showing up, heh!)

BEG YOUR FUCKING PARDON!? IM ALREADY EMOTIONAL BECAUSE MY OTHER FICTIONAL FATHER FIGURE IN MY OTHER SILLY SHOW MIGHT DIE THIS FRYDAY... WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU MADE POSEIDON SAY "I SURRENDER" TWICE!!! TO FUCKING ZEUS!!! TO PROTECT PERCY?! I FUCKING LOVE THE SHOW.

Hermes IS the FUCKING snitch of the olympus.

Poseidon : "Who knows about father?"

Zeus: "Ares, Hades, you, i... And fucking Hermes so..."

Both: "everyone, then..."

He really asked Mr. Impertinent if he is obedient?! Hahahaha... Poseidon, dear beach daddy, sir... He is yours and Sally's, what makes you think he'll be obedient?!

"Ares IS a moron" sooooo ... Percy speaks facts because he speaks his father language then. Sorry, this is funnier than i thought It would be. Poseidon being an affectionate father for like 3 seconds before the daddy issues kicked in and push his son away with magic...

THIS. This here with the victorius Hero looking at the defeated who even "dead" had safe his life. Because the mention of Thalia's death was enough for Zeus to spare Percy's life... She had save Percy by being dead and make her father feel guilty for that. Also, he left camp making jokes about the tree and Thalia's death, and look how serious and respectful he looks now. Admiring that tree, Thalia, and all what she means to the demigods... (Maybe i'm reading too much into It, but i liked this frames too much)

Did i spot a pair of twins?! I need the second season NOW and i'm not even half way of the last episode of the first one...

SECOND HUG OF ANNABETH TO PERCY!!! AND HE IS SMILING!!! BOY I WANT TO HUG THEM BOTH... MY BABYS...

Oh~ they are going to do this "Clarise IS guilty but we couldn't risk a war here" to the end so the show watchers don't see It coming. Okay... I like how they are doing this.

Luke and Percy alone in the forest while Annabeth watches Clarise... Yeah... This is it.

I like the lights changing colors because of the fireworks but just giving more dramatic contrast to all the scene. Oh~ Luke's face... My gods!! (These kids are making me insane with how good actors they are!!!)

Luke trying to recruit Percy because he sees himself reflected in Percy, with their mothers suffering because of the gods. "This wasn't to betray you Percy. My enemies are the gods." SEE!!! RIGHT THERE!!! THAT'S A BOY ABOUT TO REBEL AGAINST HIS FATHER, TRYING TO RECRUIT HIS FRIENDS BECAUSE HE IS RIGHT BUT USING THE WORSE WAYS POSSIBLE TO DO THINGS!!!

I said it before, and i'm saying It again... I LOVE THE SHOW.

BACKBITER!!!!! OH MY GODS!!! THAT SWORD IS...HAVE YOU ALL SEE THAT!!! IT FUCKING CUT ANYTHING.

"WE is the word Zeus fear most." And again, as i said above, he is so RIGHT and so wrong at the same time. Luke speech is a 10/10

Percy's reaction. PERCY'S REACTION!!! first to Luke's speech. And then when he wounded Luke with his own sword, he INMEDIATELY apologize to him. "Sorry, i didn't mean to..." Because he knows Luke is being manipulated by Cronos, he still sees him as a friend. And that's why he is scared, also because Luke cut him back, but because his friend is choosing to betray him.

WOOOO!!! ANNABETH?! WOOOOO... LUKE'S FACE!!! ANNABETH'S FACE!!! MY GODS!!! THOSE KIDS!!!

Chiron: "Cronos is persuasive"

Percy: "i'm a seaweed brain, stubborn as fuck... I'll be fine..."

I love Dionysus. Like...

Dionysus: "wait, wait, wait... Peter Johnson, why is everyone calling you Percy?"

Percy: "i'm Percy Jackson, that's my name"

Dionysus: "are you sure? You don't look like a Percy to me, Peter"

A seaweed brain, has being delivered and i'm vibing, living, happy...

ANNABETH IS GOING TO DISNEYWORLD AND PERCY SMILING MADE HER WORRY SHE WILL BE IN TROUBLE THERE!!! SHE IS SO ADORABLE!!! I'LL PROTECT THAT CHILD WITH MY LIFE, I SWEAR TO ALL THE GODS!!!

Grover!!! GROVER TELLING PERCY HE IS GOING TO SEARCH FOR PAN IN THE SEA!!! AND PERCY ACTING LIKE A NEPO BABY!!! LOVED IT!!!

Baby coming back to the beach House... Sally!!!!!!!!!!

Nooooooooooo... Fucking Cronos!!!!

Sally: *all worried* "another nightmare?"

Persassy: "grampa"

Sally: *i swear i saw her roll her eyes* "don't call him that"

I LIKE THE END OF GABE!!!! FUCK YOU GABE!!! Sally is divorcing him, change the locks and his first question to his lawyer is if he knows how to pick a lock... Fuck you, Gabe~

He turning himself into a statue because he opened a box for Percy (wich IS illegal) and after he called the head of Medusa gross... Poetic justice.

(i'm ending to watch this and write this at 5:22... My brain isn't braining anymore. So... Tomorrow i'll post a separated part about the thrones of the gods and maybe trying to put my degree in good use and picking all the art references i could and make a post about them)

#pjo tv show #percy jackon and the olympians #Percy Jackson spoilers #pjo episode 8 #seriously spoilers of everything

[acertainmoshke]

Falling Petals

So. I am working on 4 projects right now, and I swore I wouldn't start another until one of them is done. So I won't. But I couldn't stop thinking about my next project, Falling Petals, a generational story about autism and trauma, and so I'm writing ABOUT it so I can move on and go back to actually writing a current project.

It takes place over 4 generations, and exactly 100 years.

We start with Ira, a Jewish boy born to immigrants right at the start of the Great War. A boy who sees the beauty and the poetry in the world around him, but not in the people. A clever boy who loves learning but has little use for school. Who doesn’t feel pain right and outwardly uses touching hot pots as a party trick to make the other boys admire him, but internally is always seeking sensation. Whose blunt honesty and humorous comments have a certain charm, who knows strange facts and can talk for hours about minute details until the people he initially had laughing and hanging on his words get bored and wander off.

Ira, a boy who came of age during the Great Depression and got left behind as friends went to college or got married. Who told himself he was happy to write poetry, take pictures, and read endless books while working in his father’s store. He charmed the girls who came in but never got past a first date. His few real friends were gone and the neighbors avoided him. He was really alone with only his books, camera, and mitzvot for company. Because, yes, he went to shul every week. He struggled to understand human reasoning, but the rules made sense to him and he followed them more stringently than his parents.

Ira, who his parents gave up on ever marrying until he started to spend time with Joy. She was from his synagogue and, unlike the other girls, she debated him back about philosophy. She wrote her own poetry and read enough to keep up with him. They were soon married, and Ira kept obliviously talking about his own interests and making jokes at her expense, not noticing as she got quieter.

Ira, who amidst the terror of World War II—which he was not drafted into—had four children, three boys and a girl. Ira, who adored the beauty and frozen moments of their lives but himself froze up when trying to connect to them, who wrote poetry and took pictures but then mocked them and criticized them if they ever showed the weaknesses that had failed to serve him.

Ira, who would one day be known as a crotchety old man for doing the same things he had always done.

And then there’s Daniel, born in the middle of the Shoah and always aware of that terror though an ocean separated them. A sensitive child who cried too much for a boy, whose first tormentor was his father trying to make him stronger and whose second was his older brother. A boy who longed to belong with other boys, but found no matter how he tried he didn’t. Who found solace in stories, who devoured comic books and looked forward to shul services every week in a way his siblings didn’t. The people in the stories there felt more like a family to him than his real one.

Daniel, who was eager to grow up but also smart. Who was able to learn and hide his less desirable traits. Who stopped crying and forced all his emotions down, until he began to feel low-level anger all day every day, made worse by loud noises and crowds and new situations. Who carefully watched and mimicked other people until he could come across as friendly and charming on a surface level. Who never let anyone get closer than that.

Daniel, who came of age amidst anti-war protests and the civil rights movement. Who wanted so badly to be involved but had learned never to shake things up. Who wanted to work in a library but became an architect because his father wanted it. Who wanted to be loved so badly he latched onto the first woman to show him affection, a teacher named Poppy, who buried himself even deeper than usual to earn her love, praying he would never blow up in uncontrollable anger this time.

Daniel, who swore he would be better than his father, and was. Who at least spent time with his daughters and never mocked them, but who had never learned to cope with noise and chaos and would unpredictably yell at them for it. Who always hated himself for that after but never told them that. He worked long hours because he had been taught that he could never assert himself for his needs, and this only made him less able to handle life at home. He rarely yelled at Poppy, but took it out on the girls. Especially Shoshanah, who he saw as giving in to the weakness and laziness he had always fought not to have.

Shoshanah, born amidst a time of change and reckoning and standing up for oneself. Who was a sensitive child, but that was allowed as a girl. Who was clever and full of imagination and struggled to make friends but successfully kept one school friend and played constantly and happily with her sister.

Shoshanah, who came of age in a new age of computers and arcades and neon lights. Who still seemed a child, still played with Barbies. Who read a lot and recited lists of facts but got poor grades in school, where she was overwhelmed and bullied. Whose one friend had abandoned her when their interests diverged and whose Wrongness was stark in comparison to her sister who wore hairspray and lipstick, read magazines, and went dancing with boys. Shoshanah, who still wanted to play games and make up stories and was too old to be this sensitive and hated going out in public and covered her ears at loud noises. Who found solace in novels, in writing stories, and in the familiar prayers at shul with the familiar tunes that made her feel safe and loved.

Shoshanah, who went to college all excited to learn about psychology because she didn’t understand people but was fascinated with them. Who dropped out in shame 3 years later because she couldn’t handle the social aspect or keep up with the homework. Who had to go to her sister’s law school graduation while she still lived at home and worked as a stocker at the grocery store. Who still collected Barbies and wrote novels on her grandfather’s old typewriter and spent her time alone. Whose clothes never quite matched and were always too loud.

Shoshanah, who discovered independence by living with a roommate at 30, found that she could handle responsibility when it was shared and friendship when it wasn’t teenage. Who got an entry-level position at the library and never wanted to leave. Who knew she could never handle having children, but eventually found herself love with someone who got her.

Shoshanah, who saw herself in her baby niece and swore she would never learn to hate herself for who she was.

Naomi, born into a world of rapidly changing technology where there was not even a family computer in the house the year she was born but by high school she would own her own laptop and iPod. Who never seemed able to keep up with the speed of things she wasn’t interested in, but argued rapid-fire when she understood the details. Who grew up too sensitive to sound, to light, to the way people looked at her when she didn’t know the right answer in conversation.

But also Naomi, who learned to wear headphones with no music so the world didn’t hurt. Who lived in pajama pants and long skirts and never jeans. Who cut her hair short at 12 and never went back. Who learned from her aunt that this was ok, that she was clever and beautiful. Who never felt so clever as when she went to Torah study and argued with grown adults about the finer details.

Naomi, who came of age in a world of smartphones and accommodations and who learned to advocate for herself, who got a degree in philosophy but became a book illustrator. Who shaved her head so she never had to touch her hair again, dated several women until she found one she never wanted to hide from. Who set reminders on her phone for every little part of her life, wore “actually autistic” pins in public, was never afraid to spin around when she was happy.

#I am so excited to work on this one #couldn't right now anyway though because I have to do the historical research #but also I need this story to exist SO badly #moshke writes #writeblr #falling petals

[galaxies-can-collide]

You are the new girl

Pt. 1

Summary: Y/N is new in town and comes across two beautiful boys that both spark and interest in her. Which boy will she choose....

Warnings: Just some cute stuff, romance, 18+ still to come

Word Count: 2.7k words (tbf this whole story is over 10k words)

Author Note: I am new to this whole thing, and this is my first post, so be gentle. But also let me know your thoughts and if you want more? I have written so much of this but am always willing to make changes.

You were new to the outer banks, having moved down only two days ago with your dad. It was just you and him, your mom walked out on the two of you when you were 8 and she never looked back. You did not mind it being just the two of you, he did everything for you, to make sure you had everything you wanted, or at least what he could afford to give you. Your dad was a contract Architect working on a new build upon Tannyhill. He had told me that Mr. Cameron wanted a new pool house where he would put all his boating and scuba equipment. Must be nice to have that kind of money at your reach, you lived a very different life, you and your dad just getting by so when he got this job opportunity he could not pass it up. As for the reason that we had to relocate was because we lived too far away for my dad to have to drive down every day and Mr. Cameron insisted on us living in his second house just off the side of Tannyhill. You were not too happy on the fact that he was up and relocating your whole life for a 1 year contract work but you couldn’t fight him because we really needed the money.  You moved the Friday and spent the whole weekend getting your house sorted for your dad and you while he went to the Cameron’s to discuss the plans for the future pool house, you spent majority of the weekend unpacking boxes and getting everything in order. The house thankfully already had furniture so it was just a matter of unpacking all the little trinkets and things to make it feel a bit more like home, leaving your clothing boxes for last as you knew that was a mountain to climb on its own. 

You had just turned 18 and had made some really great friends in your old school and to have to leave them in your last year of school really put your dad in your bad books and he knew that so he did everything to make your stay great, although it did not turn out too well for him as he was always busy at the Cameron’s, early mornings and late nights and you barely saw him. You moved In the summer so you still had time before school started which you were absolutely dreading being the new kid. You had got to explore a bit during the few days off and you had come to learn that the island was split in two parts, the rich and the poor and even though you would not consider yourself rich you were staying on the ‘kook’ side of the island, much to your dismay as you had come to learn that they were not nice people. You had never met one of the kooks but from what you heard they were snobs who knew they had money and did not care to show it.

The Monday before school started you had decided to go for a stroll down to the docks and came across a group of teens that looked about your age, from the way they were dressed you assumed they were pogues, the poorer side, as they say. You went and introduced yourself in the hopes they went to the same school and were nice, it would be nice to at least know a few people at school so that you were not completely alone. 

 You walked up to them and shyly introduced yourself, “Hi I’m Y/N”, you said and they all looked up a little shocked but soon their sheepish faces turned to smiles as they all introduced themselves. The first was a curly, brown haired girl, “Hi Y/N, lovely to meet you I am Kiara” you smiled and shook her hand the next one who looked a little more put together than the rest was a blonde haired girl, “Hiya, I am Sarah”, you smiled back to her, the next to say hello were two boys almost simultaneously saying “Hello” they soon introduced themselves as John B and Pope. They all seemed lovely, except there was one boy that had not yet said anything, to be fair I do not think he had noticed you coming up to them as he was distracted with something else.

 He would soon draw his attention to you, his eyes glistened a little in the sun and you noticed his beautiful blonde hair and his piercing blue eyes looking directly at you, you smiled as he scanned you up and down, his eyes lingering a little too long on your figure, making you blush a little. You were becoming more aware that the shorts you were wearing were very short and the small shirt covering your boobs was a little to see through, you swiftly crossed your arms across your chest causing the blonde haired boy to blush as he realised he had been staring and you had noticed. He got up from where he as sitting and made his way over to you as he got to you he said so smoothly “Well you must be new here because I would have noticed someone as breath-taking as you walking around her, hi I’m JJ. And it is my pleasure to meet you”, you could not help but blush and let a small smile creep up to your lips and you said a shy “Nice to meet you, I’m Y/N” back to him.

 After all the introductions were done, noticing that JJ had been taking small stares at you thinking you were noticing, Kiara had asked you if you were new to town as she nor the others had seen you around at all. You went on to say, “ I actually moved here around 4 days ago with my Dad, he is an architect and he is currently contracting for some guy named Ward Cameron, we had to relocate cause it was too far for my dad to drive everyday so Ward was nice enough to offer us a place to stay while my dad got to work”, Sarah’s mouth was almost agape but with a hint of a smile, she almost exploded out and said “Oh my God, no fucking way, so you must be the girl staying in our old house” You were a bit confused at first then starting putting the pieces together, your dad had mentioned Ward had 3 kids, a daughter your age, a son a year older and another daughter a few years younger you could not quite remember their names, but you now gathered Sarah was the daughter your age. She immediately ran over and gave you a big hug and continued saying “We are going to be such good friends, well me, you and the pogues”

You all got to talking and found out you would all be going to the same school, all apart from Sarah who was in a more expensive school, one that we could not afford, but I was okay with that as you knew you would have the rest of the pogues. They filled you in on how Sarah was dating John B and no longer really considered herself a Kook as she got along more with the pogues, during your whole exchanging of stories with the pogues you kept noticing JJ’s wondering eye that constantly gravitated toward you but you obviously also had a wondering eye as you and him would make constant eye contact and both smile sheepishly and look away while you blushed bright red. 

 As it got later, you knew it was time to go home, as your dads rules were when the sun goes down and the street lights come on you need to be home, he was unaware of the area and did not want you wondering around alone at night. You said bye to the gang and assured them you would see them the next day at school, Sarah offered to walk with you as you two were staying on the same plot of land, which was nice of her and it gave you time to get to know her and maybe find out more about JJ. But almost poetically just as you were walking away JJ ran up to you and Sarah and grabbed your wrist to make you face him. You were shocked at first as was Sarah but were curious to hear what he has to say, “Hey, uhm, I was uhm wondering if you would like to go for a ride tomorrow after school, I know a really cool spot for a picnic If you would like, get to know the area and me a little more. I mean if that is something you want?”, you could tell he was nervous in asking you from the way he was rubbing the back of his head and frantically searching your eyes for any sign of an answer. He seemed to loosen up a little when he saw you smile and nod your head along with a “Yes, JJ, I would love nothing more than that, after school yea?” he nodded in response and you turned and walked away with Sarah giggling by your side. Your short walk home was filled with little conversations about the area and her relationship with John B and her ex Topper and her brother Rafe. As we got to the fork of the road, one leading to Tannyhill and one to the house I was staying in, I was about to say bye when she invited me over for dinner to meet her family. You felt bad to say no as you did want to meet her family especially as they were giving you some place to stay so you agreed and she shot a big smile across her face and dragged your hand towards the house. 

 As you got closer you realised just how big the house was and just how much money the Cameron’s must have, you were taken back and at a loss for words, it was almost as if she read your mind as you got to the front door as she piped up and said “I know, it is a lot to take in, a bit much if you ask me but that is Ward Cameron for you”

You walked in with her as she introduced you to Rose her stepmother, and Wheezie her younger sister who were both in the kitchen cooking up a storm, you introduced yourself and they were both happy to have you over, Sarah then dragged you upstairs to her dads office where she introduced you to her dad, “Hey Dad, this is Y/N, she is Y/D/N daughter, I invited her over for dinner, I hope that is alright?”, he got up from the desk he was sitting at and walked over to you, he carried himself with wealth and pride and you kind of admired him for the life he has built for himself and his family. He reached his hand out to shake yours and you complied, “Hi Y/N, I am Ward, lovely to meet you. Your dad is a very talented man and I think he will do wonders here”, “Thank you, he is pretty great”, you replied. He continued “Also, of course it is fine that you stay for dinner, next time bring your old man up here too” you simply nodded as Sarah dragged you out of his office and downstairs. 

 But there was a different plan for you, as you exited Ward’s office, you had bumped hard into the chest of a very tall man, as you looked up you stared into these piercing blue eyes and a slight smirk that crossed his face. 

The tall man grabbed your elbows as to stop you from falling over, you immediately started apologising for not looking where you were going. “I am so sorry, I really need to watch where I am going”, you half hated yourself for being so clumsy, he hushed you in the softest voice, “Don’t worry about it gorgeous, you can bump into me anytime” he said with a wink. Sarah then stepped in and I soon realised that this must be Rafe, her brother, although a warning on how handsome this man was would have been nice. “Rafe, back up off her man” Sarah said and you were kind of angry that she did and you wanted to be up close to him and smell his cologne. 

 “Also, stop flirting, you have a girlfriend”, she continued. Your face instantly dropped at the thought of his girlfriend, not that you had a chance anyway. Rafe seemed to have noticed this sudden shift in your demeanour and that intrigued him, although he was taken he had never seen someone so perfect and so soft in his life. It made him want to know everything about her, and where she came from and why she was here which is weird as he had spoken but a mere word to her.

 “This is Y/N, her dad is building the new pool house. I would appreciate if you did not corrupt her as she is staying on the property.” Sarah interrupted the longing look between the two of you, noticing that Rafe’s hand was still holding your elbow, which did not go unnoticed by you either, but you could not bring yourself to pull away.

But after Sarah made that statement he retracted his hand and moved slightly back “You know Sarah, this might come as a shock but not ever girl I meet, I want to fuck. I am taken, remember” Rafe stated harshly, and he cursed himself for saying those words because there was something about you that he could not quite put his finger on but he wanted more. Sarah scoffed and pulled you with her, but just as she walked away Rafe mumbled just loud enough for you to hear, “God, she is so fucking beautiful” as he muttered these words he had caught on that you heard and he blushed at the thought. He winked at you as you were being pulled away and you knew that this would not be your last encounter with Rafe Cameron. 

Rafe’s POV: 

He has just gotten off the phone with his girlfriend, surprise, surprise another fight, he was so sick of the arguments and fights. Quite frankly he did not love her anymore, he hadn’t for a while now and he knew he had to end it. He wanted to chat to his dad and see if he could give him any advice on what to do. As he exited his room and made his way to his dads office Sarah had walked out, but he hadn’t noticed the girl following closely behind her. She had bumped right into his chest and he grabbed her elbows to steady her so that she did not fall over, although when he looked down to see who it was he was taken back by her absolute beauty, he had never seen someone so beautiful and he did not know what to say. He was mesmerised, he wanted to know who this was. He noticed her long blonde hair, that seemed to have lighter streaks all over, but looked natural. He noticed her beautiful green/blue eyes. He was hooked on her smell, let alone her looks. 

After I had finished taking in every inch of her she started apologising, I said to her “Don’t worry about it gorgeous, you can bump into me anytime” and saw a shy smile creep on her lips, probably the most breath-taking smile you have ever seen. Sarah obviously stuck her nose in it and ruined it and said I had a girlfriend, unaware of the fact that we were basically on waters edge. At the mention of a girlfriend her face dropped and I was intrigued, did she feel the same way about me as I did her. But my brain is too slow for my stupid mouth and I said some cocky line that I instantly regretted. I found out her name was Y/N, the most gorgeous name, and that she was staying on the property. This was the best news.

Sarah pulled her away and I mumbled under my breath unable to keep it to myself and she heard me and I was part glad that she did so that she was aware and with that I winked at her and she was gone. I had a feeling that this would not be my last encounter with her, I really hoped it wasn’t 

#rafe #rafe x you #rafe fanfiction #rafe cameron #rafe outer banks #rafe obx #rafe y/n #rafe imagine #jj #jj maybank #jj imagine #outer banks #rafe x y/n #rafe x reader #rafe series #jj x you #jj x y/n

[moviemunchies]

By Frank, they did it! They made an excellent follow-up to Dune: Part One!

We’re going to have a couple of minor spoilers in this review; be aware.

After the events of the first movie, Paul Atreides has joined the Fremen in their fight with the Harkonnens. He becomes a leader among them, and even finds love in Chani, one of the lead freedom fighters. But his role as leader stirs some to think he’s their prophesied messiah. That’s a role he doesn’t want to take, because he’s foreseen how much violence it will lead to across the galaxy, and Chani (correctly) sees the prophecy as a method the Bene Gesserit use to manipulate and colonize. As the conflict goes on, however, Paul finds himself wondering if he has to use this image of himself as a messiah; not helping, his mother has started pushing his cult among the Fremen.

Gosh, this movie was great. The first movie and this one reminded me of what it was like to watch an epic film series, a sequence of stories told cinematically in a fantastical setting that build on each other, and together tell a coherent, complete story. Do you remember when everyone was trying to do that? I’m not talking about comic book films, obviously. A lot of films didn’t succeed, to be sure, but then teen romance films became A Thing, and then dystopian films became a thing, and then comic book films, and so most studios didn’t even try to do these kinds of epics anymore. So I was very happy to see Dune managing it.

I am bummed that we’re not going to receive an extended edition, like we did with Lord of the Rings. I know that these movies are already very long, but the director admitted that he cut a lot of things to make it all fit

The changes to the narrative are noticeable, to those who have read the book, but I think they work. A lot of people came away from the original Dune novel thinking that it’s a straightforward Hero’s Journey, and that the following books are a departure from that, even though there are hints throughout that book that Paul becoming a messiah figure is A Very Bad Thing. These movies maybe beat you over the head with that, though I think it ultimately works because, yeah, it’s a very bad thing, and it all goes south incredibly quickly.

Making Chani the main voice of the, “Wow, this messiah business is some BS, huh?” opinion is an interesting choice. It is a bit heavy-handed in how it gives you the intent of the messiah storyline to the audience; it is also good that someone has this view in the movie, because yes, the prophecy was invented to do what Chani says it was–manipulate a populace. I’m curious as to how the third movie, if it happens, will go with her, as the version in the book is fine with the messiah role. She has a large part in Dune: Messiah, and I don’t know how it will fit in with the version of Chani that’s in this movie. 

We should also talk about the Bene Gesserit? They’re interesting, but there is one part of the film that doesn’t quite work for me. Slight spoiler, but in this movie, it’s revealed that they’re the architects of the plan to wipe out House Atreides. That doesn’t make any goshdarn sense, given that they wanted Jessica and Paul to survive in the last movie, and it’s unclear what they would get out of this. It makes more sense the idea as it is in the books–that the Emperor wiped them out because he saw it as a threat to his power without direct action, but also a way to weaken House Harkonnen.

There are some creative choices in the direction of the way things look? Mostly I’m thinking of the Harkonnen homeworld in this film, which is a really fun change of pace. The way it looks is completely different from both Arrakis and the Atreides homeworld. It not only shows you what’s it like for a world under Harkonnen control, and the entire sequence develops their family. And it’s a great introduction to Feyd-Rautha, a key character in the proceedings of the story’s climax.

It’s a fantastic film. It’s an excellent sequel to the first one, and it displays just how much the director understands what he’s doing in telling a visual story. I love this and I want to see more of it. Not just in the sense of wanting to see the sequel (which I do), but I want to see more of these kinds of movies. The big epics, the ones that are telling big stories with epic battles in multiple parts, told by directors who know how to make them memorable instead of copying what’s already been made popular.

#Dune #Movie Munchies #Dune: Part Two #reviews

[neb-art-zeke]

Hey! Just wanted to say your Dragon Age tiktoks are awesome ! I just started playing the game recently myself and I've been having a blast ( Also I have made the conscious decision to romance Solas 🥲 - I only know pain now )

Was going to ask what you're hoping to find(places , story beats , recurring characters etc.) in the upcoming Dragon Age game?

Thank you so much and glad to hear you're having a good time playing Dragon Age (good luck with Solas tho lol).

So in terms of the next Dragon Age and some cool things I would love to see, I've decided I'm going to split this ask into different posts with this post talking about storylines/quests.

Disclaimers before I start this little series:

SPOILERS FOR GAMES AND EXPANDED MEDIA

These ideas are simply things I think would be really cool to see in Dreadwolf but I understand that as a business and developer, Bioware has a budget, limited resources, time constraints/deadlines (which they're already in Alpha so they can't really make huge changes to the game at this point) and demands from leadership. With this understanding, I'm not going to be angry at Bioware if all of these ideas aren't implemented. At this point, I'm just really interested to see what they come up with and how it adds to (and/or takes away from) the overall series.

The formatting of this series may not be totally structured as I tried really hard to put everything down in a concise manner but couldn't always decide how far I should go with these ideas lol.

With that all said, let me get into it.

Story Direction/Focus

Contrary to Origins and Inquisition where you focused on gathering an army to face off against a powerful being with its own army and given that Solas has the forces to infiltrate a larger organization set against him, I think the direction of the next game should be about finding a few select individuals/items that can pose a genuine threat to his plans and being proactive in that act (unlike most of Inquisition where it was about getting and stopping [insert thing] before Corypheus got to it). For example, I would love for Feynriel from DA2 to make a return as a valuable (non-playable) ally (maybe as the dreamer who can protect us from Solas/The Dreadwolf from the Fade). Also, I would love to see Morrigan and, if existing, Kieran return, maybe with Morrigan's own motives being to find her "inheritance" (Mythal essence or whatever was placed in the Eluvian at the end of Inquisition) to be a match for Solas in terms of raw power.

Locations (Northern Thedas with more cities than open land)

The Tevinter Imperium (pls a grand, expansive Miranthous)

The Anderfels (Weisshaupt and Hossberg)

Nevarra (Cumberland and Necropolis)

Seheron (dense jungles)

Kal-Sharok (idk what to expect)

Antiva (Antiva City)

Rivain (port towns)

Main Storyline(s)/Quests

STOP SOLAS

Get important item/person from Tevinter and Par Vollen (could relate to the Great Dragons)

Get important item/person from Weisshaupt (maybe we can get a reveal of the First Warden/a means to combat the Red Lyrium Idol/return of The Architect!?!?)

Get important item/person from Kal-Sharok (could feed into the discovery of another Titan and dwelve more into the history and details of Kal-Sharok and its dwarves)

Get a huge lead from the Executors from across the Sea

Side Storylines/Quests

Open World Quests (helping people in cities and settlements - might dwelve into fetch quests but if the storytelling is on point, I wouldn't mind it)

Companion/Romance Quests

"National" Quests (i.e. in Antiva, complete assassinations, Rivain go treasure hunting, Tevinter free slaves and take down slavers, Anderfels defend settlements from darkspawn, etc)

Ghilan'nain's Beast Hunting - kaiju battles ;)

Prologue Ideas (preferably less than 10 minutes since we still have Origins to get to or could honestly be short playable cutscenes)

Playing as Solas during the last moments of Ancient Elvhenan (racing through Skyhold to create the Veil)

Playing as the Inquisitor as they chase down Solas. They have a brief reunion before Solas escapes.

Tbh, I don't need the game to amount to 100+ hours of gameplay, I rather have quality over quantity (essentially more story, characterization, fun and meaningful gameplay choices and options over filler quests) and besides I think with the Player Character Origins (which I'll tackle next) will help with exciting replayability.

#dragon age #dragon age dreadwolf #da: dreadwolf #bioware #solas dragon age

[volturialice]

ok I wasn't gonna do this twilight advent thing because y'all know I'm Not Great at consistent participation but if it's Jasper's Hobbies Day I obviously have to weigh in so here goes

listen. the important thing to keep in mind about jasper is that he's boring. he's soooooooo boring. he has all the tastes and proclivities of a middle-aged dad. just utterly bland dadcore taste in everything. I have this little remix snippet of one of @goldeneyedgirl's human alice/vampire jasper stories where even in human!teen!alice's wildest, horniest fantasies she can't imagine him as a peer or cool fellow teen and instead casts him as a 45-year-old nerdy professor.

which is what makes SUCH a hilarious contrast with his anything-but-boring background of violence and drama. he's kind of a jon snow-esque character in that his skills do not at all line up with his desires. by age 25 or so his only real want is to be Left Alone and yet life will not stop putting him in Situations. even when he manages to escape the cycle of violence, he ends up brother to the Main Character and husband to the World's #1 Meddler And Architect of Situations. even if alice were not an irrepressibly active person who loves nothing more than Doing Things, she's so overpowered that she creates international political incidents just by existing. jasper will never truly know a moment's peace and that's so funny and delightful.

but when he does get a moment's peace, here's what he'd like to do with it:

I agree with the canon/fanon that he's into scholarly pursuits like philosophy and history. I think history-wise he often overlaps rosalie's interest in technological history, because he blinked and missed the entire industrial revolution. I mean, he went from being human during a time without indoor plumbing to rejoining society around the time of stuff like the Space Race and the development of nuclear weapons! that's bound to pique anybody's interest. the rate of technological development is so much faster now! I can see him spending long hours talking with rose about robotics and space exploration and the future of green energy. I think he likes the logistics side of engineering because of the emphasis on efficiency and elegant solutions.

he's also happy to take all the Crime hobbies from carlisle. a whole new area of strategy where he gets to pull out all the stops and use his intimidation skills but doesn't even have to kill anyone!! what a rollicking good time.

I also agree with the fanon that as a human, jasper was a total Horse Girl who liked animals. as a vampire I can see that manifesting as an interest in conservation and biodiversity, or sustainable agriculture.

also as a human, he's very into athletic pursuits. his natural talent is for team sports and even coaching, but his interests lie more in the direction of stuff like swimming and climbing and martial arts—anything with a big emphasis on self-discipline and improvement.

in terms of the cullen family dynamic, his extreme patience means he's also voted #1 Most Likely To End Up Helping Other People With Their Hobbies. esme needs a hand with construction or renovation? he's there. rosalie needs someone to stand around and act as a car jack for hours? that's a jasper task (emmett would be her first choice except that he always gets bored and ends up trying to distract and seduce her, which inevitably works.)

the only people who can ever really coax jasper out of the dadcore mold are alice and especially emmett. emmett is a veritable genius for tapping into jasper's secret petty side. he can transform that jaded ex-war criminal nerd into a stupid goofy teenage oaf in 3.5 seconds, usually by goading him into some kind of competition. whenever they invent new games like Emmett And Jasper Ultimate MegaChess together, jasper tries to focus on developing a complex system of rules and emmett provokes him to smash right through them and play. ditto when it comes to things like pranking edward (pranks involve a lot of strategy and skill ok. they're totally a mature grown-up activity!!)

I think when he and alice first joined the cullens, jasper had lowkey forgotten how to have hobbies and considered them frivolous. until he saw how much joy and fulfillment alice got out of her hobbies and realized he'd better find some of his own or he was gonna feel lost and clingy. luckily for him these megarich vampires who never sleep have nothing but time and resources on their hands, and were happy to help him find some!

#jasper hale #meta #jalice and rosemmett if you squint #long post //

[man-reading]

A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara

Book Review - A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara

Fiction Book Review

22 Jul

It's difficult to know where to start with a review of 'A little life'. If you've read it, you'll know what I mean. It's the story of four graduates who move to New York to make their way in life. Willem is an aspiring actor; Malcolm wants to be an architect but finds his job unfulfilling; JB is talented and trying to break his way into the art world; and Jude, an ambitious, brilliant lawyer, but deeply troubled.

We follow their lives over the decades, as their relationship with each other changes. They come together, drift apart, fall in and out of love and deal with addiction. But it's Jude with his body damaged by injury and childhood trauma, who is the centre of the book, both for his friends and the reader. Can he overcome his demons?

That's about as much as I can say in terms of an overview.

Yanagihara

I bought this book at the Sun bookshop in pre-pandemic Melbourne, December 2019. I had a gift voucher, so picked this and a couple of others and dragged them back half across the world to Ireland. I can only think the sun and bushfire smoke must have affected my brain, because it must have pushed my luggage allowance close to the limit.

‘A little life’ has taunted me from my TBR bookshelf. I had heard about the subject matter, so kept putting it off until I was ready for it. Truth is, having read it, I don't think that time would ever have arisen. I did eventually read another Yanagihara book called ‘To Paradise’ which I found interesting, if a bit long, and decided this summer, with the sun arriving early in Ireland (as if that would help) I was going to tackle this 700-page door stopper.

Word of warning - this book contains descriptions of abuse, self-harm, and suicidal ideation. If you're not in a good place mentally, I wouldn't be reading this book.

Immersive

Initially, I found this book completely immersive. It doesn't happen so often to me these days, but one afternoon, I think around the 200-page mark, I realised I'd read for an hour and barely stirred. There it is, I thought, that’s the book I've been hearing so much about it.

But this was soon to change. I think this is a great book if you have a fitness tracker, as increasingly I had to put this book down and go for a walk. Sometimes into another room, sometimes out of the house and into the local park.

There are a lot of disturbing scenes and thoughts in this book. It was a challenge for me to lift it from around the 500-page mark, and there were times I could only manage a few pages. But of course, I was so invested in the characters of Jude and Willem that I was never going to walk away from the book. The characters are so rich and detailed, the prose is clean and evocative, and the storytelling and structure keep you engaged.

Jude St. Francis

I found it hard to imagine Jude's character. For some unknown reason, he became in my head Rami Malek's character 'Louis Dega' from the film 'Papillion'. Even when he was described slightly differently, it was too late. I think the lack of details from Hanya Yanagihara was deliberate - the reader had to compose their own Jude.

I liked how Yanaghira paced the book - the story of Jude's childhood is told incrementally, interspersed with a matter-of-fact narration of his life in New York. It's not dumped on you all at once.

For all the pain and trauma in the book, I think it's important to highlight the love and kindness shown to Jude by Willem, Harold, Andy, and others.

It asks the big questions - how much can a person take? Can someone be saved if they don't want to be and if they have suffered so much? Can you truly shield yourself through your money and career? And is love and friendship enough?

Polarising

Of all the books I've read and reviewed, I've never been more on the fence than I have with this one. On the one hand, it felt incredibly depressing and bleak at times, much too long and depressing ( I realise I said that twice).

On the other hand, parts of it, especially the initial sections, are completely immersive and it has a lot to say about the importance of love, of art, of friendship. And it will most likely break your heart a little, get under your skin, and I think that's a good thing too.

It's a book that has polarised opinion and I can see why. I am glad I read it and it's not taunting me from my bookshelf. I will never forget the character of Jude St. Francis, and I'm glad that this book challenged me - I think that's a good thing.

I think I would have to know you well before I could recommend this - only you know if you'd be able for it. Incidentally, reading it in an Irish summer didn't help, as the weather soon turned to shit.

If you've read it, please let me know below - I think I need to talk to someone after reading 'A little life'.

720 pages, Hardcover

Published March 10, 2015 by Doubleday

Amazon UKAmazon US

Hanya Yanagihara talks about ‘A little life’.

A Little Life Quotes

“You won’t understand what I mean now, but someday you will: the only trick of friendship, I think, is to find people who are better than you are—not smarter, not cooler, but kinder, and more generous, and more forgiving—and then to appreciate them for what they can teach you, and to try to listen to them when they tell you something about yourself, no matter how bad—or good—it might be, and to trust them, which is the hardest thing of all. But the best, as well.”

“….things get broken, and sometimes they get repaired, and in most cases, you realize that no matter what gets damaged, life rearranges itself to compensate for your loss, sometimes wonderfully.”

“Why wasn’t friendship as good as a relationship? Why wasn’t it even better? It was two people who remained together, day after day, bound not by sex or physical attraction or money or children or property, but only by the shared agreement to keep going, the mutual dedication to a union that could never be codified.”

“Who am I? Who am I?” “You’re Jude St. Francis. You are my oldest, dearest friend. You’re the son of Harold Stein and Julia Altman. You’re the friend of Malcolm Irvine, of Jean-Baptiste Marion, of Richard Goldfarb, of Andy Contractor, of Lucien Voigt, of Citizen van Straaten, of Rhodes Arrowsmith, of Elijah Kozma, of Phaedra de los Santos, of the Henry Youngs. You’re a New Yorker. You live in SoHo. You volunteer for an arts organization; you volunteer for a food kitchen. You’re a swimmer. You’re a baker. You’re a cook. You’re a reader. You have a beautiful voice, though you never sing anymore. You’re an excellent pianist. You’re an art collector. You write me lovely messages when I’m away. You’re patient. You’re generous. You’re the best listener I know. You’re the smartest person I know, in every way. You’re the bravest person I know, in every way. You’re a lawyer. You’re the chair of the litigation department at Rosen Pritchard and Klein. You love your job; you work hard at it. You’re a mathematician. You’re a logician. You’ve tried to teach me, again and again. You were treated horribly. You came out on the other end. You were always you.” "And who are you?" "I'm Willem Ragnarsson. And I will never let you go.”

“He had looked at Jude, then, and had felt that same sensation he sometimes did when he thought, really thought of Jude and what his life had been: a sadness, he might have called it, but it wasn't a pitying sadness; it was a larger sadness, one that seemed to encompass all the poor striving people, the billions he didn't know, all living their lives, a sadness that mingled with a wonder and awe at how hard humans everywhere tried to live, even when their days were so very difficult, even when their circumstances were so wretched. Life is so sad, he would think in those moments. It's so sad, and yet we all do it.”

“Harold sighs. “Jude,” he says, “there’s not an expiration date on needing help, or needing people. You don’t get to a certain age and it stops.”

literary fictionContemporaryLGBTMental Health

#Youtube #Hanya Yanagihara #a little life #books worth reading #queer literature #literary fiction

[thislovintime]

Clips from 1997 and 2006.

Q: “Why did you get into the music business?” Peter Tork: “Approval. Respect. Love. Girls.” - Beachwood Confidential, 1995 (x)

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"What I was working towards was to be in a group. When the Beatles hit, where were all the folkies going to go? But I also wanted to be a folk music performer. A lot of what I did was hanging out, feeling for the first time that I was part of the scene, walking down the street and seeing people I knew, doing a little flirting." - Peter Tork, Bringing It All Back Home: 25 Years of American Music at Folk City (1986) (x)

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"Dear Peter, I hope this doesn’t sound stupid. It’s something I’ve always wanted to know. Why do rock stars get all the women? I figured you would know. Even my sister likes you a lot and she doesn’t really like anyone very much. She says hi, btw. I was thinking of becoming an architect but that doesn’t seem to get the girls excited. Should I learn to play guitar? Thanks bro,  Jon L."

"Dear Jon, Thanks for asking. I’ve never wondered the same thing; I’ve been too busy trying to get the women by being a pop star so I’ve never had time to stop and tell on the roses, as it were. But since it all came up lo, these many years ago, I’ve actually given the matter some thought. Here’s some of what I’ve come up with: For one thing, those of us who got into show business did so IN ORDER to get attention. This is sometimes an outgrowth of a conviction in childhood that people didn’t much care about us, or even notice us. We determined that if we could get the millions (or, say, dozens) to love us, then it wouldn’t matter that we weren’t much regarded on an individual basis in our youth. For some of us, it worked. Unfortunately, it has its drawbacks. You don’t get to know these ahead of time, so I’m going to tell you. One of them is, that the girls we do get mostly want us for the show we put on. By that, I don’t mean only the stuff that goes on onstage, but the way we present ourselves when we meet someone. I have a ready stock of funny stories and sly ways to hook a girl in, but in the end, that’s what she goes for, and when it comes time for me to be myself, she’s always kind of shocked. […] Check it out: architecture is a deeply satisfying career and you’re going to find a relationship that suits you if you’ll only let it happen and what you do for a living will be only one measure of your true value in the eyes of a worthy, intelligent, supportive woman. Good luck, Peter” - Ask Peter Tork, The Daily Panic, 2008 (x)

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"In spite of all his clowning, Peter was a rather serious chap. […] Peter was a loud, powerful singer (I used to call him a romp’em, stomp’em type of singer), while I was a soft ballad singer. He had enormous stage presence and I had very little. He played the banjo, I played the guitar. […] He was restless and intense, while I was calm. He loved to be with a lot of people all of the time, whereas I liked to be completely alone some of the time. And last, but not least, Peter Tork had quite a way with the girls." - Bruce Farwell, 16’s The Monkees: Here We Are (1967) (x)

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“Next to his music, girls interested Peter Tork more than anything else in the whole wide world. He loved them all — and most of them loved him. Peter wasn’t tall, dark or handsome, but he made up for his liabilities with his great warmth, enthusiasm and sense of humor. He was also basically a very kind and giving person. He just had a way of making people happy even when he was broke, freezing cold and there were no prospects for work in the future. That Pied Piper-ish quality Peter had attracted girls of all shapes and sizes. He had many brief romances and a couple of very serious ones, and even today Peter is still good friends with almost every girl he knew, dated, or fell in love with during his Greenwich Village days.” - Lance Wakely, 16, March 1967

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“Peter was great for the chicks of the village… they queued up to see him and talk to him. But eventually he had an offer to join the Phoenix Singers, who were short of a guy to play banjo AND guitar. And if you still have any doubts about whether he really does play, and play well, then the thing to do is ask the management behind the Phoenix Singers. Even without the Monkees, there is little doubt that the amiable Peter would have mae the grade in the music business. When, eventually, Peter went to the West Coast, to California, he wasn’t kept waiting long for fame. Within two months he was auditioned and accepted for the Monkees. Behind him was a mass of previous girlfriends but, unlike many blokes, Peter has the knack of staying on very friendly terms with girls even after he’s stopped going out with them.” - Record Mirror, February 25, 1967

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“...Inside his dressing room, he towels the sweat from [his] head, takes out a guitar, pulls up a chair and starts singing ME a song. [...] He DIPS me, yes, like a dance dip, asks me permission and then kisses ME chastely on my cheek!... [...] Months later, when I returned back to earth, I received a three page letter from Peter Tork (remember, he asked me for my address before the dip) which was just beautiful, poetry mixed with kindness, which is how I choose to this day to describe him as a human.”:

“I heard this on the radio!

‘TODAY at 4pm, THE MONKEES will be appearing at RECORD WORLD!’

I looked at a map to see where Record World was located (yes, I had a map in my glove compartment) and plotted and within seconds, turned the car in the opposite direction of Georgetown and hightailed to some mall in Virginia. The line to meet the Monkees was surprisingly huge. It wrapped all the way around the mall twice. Anxious to make it back to campus for the first night of my senior year, which we all know is the BEST night of the year, I became anxious the line was too long and The Monkees would leave before they got to me. I needed to come up with a plan, stepping off the line, I found myself moments later in Sharper Image, purchasing a small tape recorder.

With tape recorder in hand, I marched myself up to the security guard outside the RECORD WORLD where all four of the Monkees were signing records.

‘I’m here from the Georgetown University newspaper, The Hoya. I wasn’t even sure if that was the title of our school newspaper…a lucky guess.

‘I’m hoping to get a quick interview with the guys.’

‘Sure, right this way.’

WOW!  That was easy.

They let me cut the line and stand RIGHT behind the Monkees while they continued to sign records. Me looking out at a sea of other Monkee lunatics, just like me!

OMG!!!  I had NO questions, I had no way of handling being this close to the four guys that I spent my entire pubescent life fantasizing about marrying, dancing or at least camping!

‘Hello.’ Micky Dolenz says to me!!! and I go numb. I got nothing.  

I look over to Peter Tork, who asks me my name and when I say Mary, Davy Jones chimes in and says, ‘Ah, Mary Mary.’


WHAT!!!!????  Smelling salts please?? (Actually, true story, Lara did really pass out once when she met Davy Jones at a book signing!)

I stumbled my way through the interview, holding up the tiny tape recorder every time I asked a question. Thankfully they never caught on that the tape recorder didn’t even have batteries in it or that I had not actually pushed any of the buttons to start or stop recording. I just moved it from my mouth to their face, like a child playing make-believe.

I kindly say thank you and tear up. The security guard ushers me away from the table but right before I was about to steal a tuft of [Micky]’s hair, Peter Tork looks at me and said, ‘write your phone number down here.’

In a Monkees haze, I write it and then, I’m quickly whisked away by security.

I cried the entire 3-hour car ride back to DC, happy tears, and this was before cell phones, so I had no one to call and scream the news. Just me, alone, reliving how I had just pulled off a Monkees miracle.

When I arrived back to my senior year house, all my pals were wondering why I was so late and informed me I had thirty minutes to get dressed because we were all heading out for the BIG first night back at school. The night you waited all summer long for, so you could show off how great you looked to your biggest crush.

I threw down my bag, jumped in the shower and was interupted by my roommate telling me that I had a phone call.

Wet from the shower, I grabbed the call.

‘Hi.  This is the Monkees Tour Manager.  Peter Tork asked me to leave two tickets for you at the Will Call for tonight’s show.  It starts at 8pm.’

I looked at the clock…it was 6pm….the concert was two hours away, back to where I had just left the scene of my delicious deception.

I HAD TO GO!

I started down my list of roommates to come with me, one at a time, rejection, followed with ‘YOU’RE NUTS!!’

Finally, I bribed my most beautiful and most fun pal Emily to join me. I think the bribe was, I’ll pay all your bar tabs the entire first semester if you drive to Virginia with me.  If you saw how we drank back then, this was a generous offer.

She agreed to join me, but made me promise we could be back by midnight as to not miss out on the first night back to school.

‘Done!’

And there we were, back in my car, heading two hours south, right back to where I just come from.

We arrived at the concert hall and Emily (my personal timekeeper) reminded me. ‘You have two hours…that’s it.’

We had great seats and a bunch of songs in, a roadie came and plucked us from our seats to go backstage. WHAT!

There was an intermission or maybe it was the moment between the last song and the encore, but all I remember what that it was fast and there was a lot of scrambling.

This was the first ‘backstage’ I had ever seen.  A minute in, Peter Tork comes over to ME!?  Says, ‘I’m so glad you made it’ and invites ME!? into his dressing room.

I look at Emily, who somehow understands just how big a deal this was to me and grants me, sternly, ‘10 minutes!!’

Inside his dressing room, he towels the sweat from [his] head, takes out a guitar, pulls up a chair and starts singing ME a song.  

The 13-year old girl in me dreamt about this moment for years and now it was right in front of me. My very own little concert with Peter.

‘2 minutes!’ An announcement comes up on a loud speaker, but the perfect amount of time for him to put down his guitar, change his shirt, tell me that I was a very special person (something about my aura), asks me to write down my address in a small book AND then………

He DIPS me, yes, like a dance dip, asks me permission and then kisses ME chastely on my cheek!

The door opens, Emily is now [tapping] her feet and thwarting off flirtatious talk by Davy Jones (with something I remember as subtle as ‘FUCK OFF!’)

‘You’re done!’ She tells me sternly.

I was, forever.  Forever change, just like Marcia Brady was when Davy Jones kissed her on her cheek.

The whole ride home we laughed at the idea that we were ‘groupies’ and I tried to downplay to her how UNBELIEVABLE and SUREAL the whole moment was. Like I had manifested a dream.

Later that night, back with other people my own age, back to what we all deemed very important…shots and dancing, I was still reliving every moment of what happened that magical day, wishing I had a phone to call Lara (she’d never believe it) or that that there was a special Monkees hotline that I could call to discuss ‘my feelings.’

‘What is that!?’ My friend Chudney asked me mid dance to Franki Valli’s Oh What A Night, pointing to a small foam ball peeking perfectly outside the middle of my bra. I looked down, reached in and just started laughing.

Peter’s microphone fob (or whatever the furry thing is at the tip of the microphone) must have fallen into my shirt during our torrid dip.

This was sure to go into the Smithsonian of my life.  

Months later, when I returned back to earth, I received a three page letter from Peter Tork (remember, he asked me for my address before the dip) which was just beautiful, poetry mixed with kindness, which is how I choose to this day to describe him as a human.

Yes I was 22 and he was 52, yes this moment would be fully frowned upon today, but it was my moment, willingly and open heartedly.  I willed myself backstage and into that dressing room and I’m grateful for that his real sweetness and this (I’m hoping you find benign and funny) story.

Yesterday when I heard of Peter’s passing, I danced with my daughter (even dipped her a few times) and then expressed gratitude to Peter and The Monkees for keeping me innocent, for keeping me weird and for keeping me alive with possibilities of real love – the kind you get from a song, or a glance or a sweet cheek kiss.” - Mary Giuliani, thriveglobal dot com, February 2019

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