#this goes for. all the versions where magic is involved. he's not stupid he was magicked to forget

[i-was-bored-so-this-happened]

"Cinderella's prince is so stupid-" pART OF THE SPELL THAT ALLOWED CINDERELLA TO GO TO THE BALL WAS THAT NO ONE WOULD REMEMBER OR RECOGNISE HER ONCE SHE LEFT, he's super smart and strong minded to even remember dancing with her

#this goes for. all the versions where magic is involved. he's not stupid he was magicked to forget #2015 cinderella chef's kiss bc everyone was magicked but he STILL REMEMBERED HER

[mcflymemes]

AS SAID BY DORIAN PAVUS  *  assorted dialogue from dragon age inquisition, updated version

i don't care what they think about me. i care what they think about us.

i like you. more than i should. more than might be wise.

discretion isn't your thing, is it?

all this dancing, politics, and murder makes me a bit homesick.

i suppose it really depends. how bad do you want to be?

living a lie... it festers inside of you, like poison.

i'm a man of many talents. what can i say?

the moment i saw you, i thought "there's a man who knows quality."

if you don't come through this, i swear i'll kill you.

i'm curious where this goes, you and i. we've had fun. perfectly reasonable to leave it here.

here is my proposal: we dispense with the chitchat and move on to something more primal.

i tease you too much, i know.

i'll have to find something we can do that doesn't involve teasing.

time to drink myself into a stupor. it's been that sort of day.

i see you enjoy playing with fire.

i like playing hard to get.

i'm not suggesting we venture into mutual domesticity.

if it's a trap, we escape and kill everyone. you're good at that.

talk to me. let me hear how mystified you are by my anger.

oh, i'm not arguing. just pointing out the ridiculously obvious.

if you choose to leave your door unlocked like a savage, i may or may not come.

now... what was i talking about? ah, yes. me.

i am apparently an incredible ass at accepting gifts.

i prefer the company of men.

would you prefer me bound and leashed?

sometimes the ones you love are also the ones who disappoint you the most.

you are the man i love, [name]. nothing will truly keep us apart.

the things you ask are just... very personal.

sometimes... love isn't enough.

there will always be an "us." we'll just be... farther apart, for a time.

i had no idea something like you was possible.

i'm imagining what you would look like in a dress.

i've never seen you smile so much!

i have no idea what you're talking about.

you stand there, flexing your muscles, huffing like some beast of burden with no thought save conquest.

you're shaping the world for good or ill. how could i aspire to do any less?

my footsies are freezing, thank you.

don't you ever bathe?

you're not suggesting we're similar.

watch where you're pointing that thing!

i'm not wearing a skirt.

it's significantly more impressive than hitting them with a sharp piece of metal.

i only meant to say i'm very sorry for your loss.

we can continue this dance forever, if you wish.

i'm saying we should be careful what we assume when it comes to such matters.

demons don't appreciate a man with good hair.

what i wouldn't give for some proper wine.

your outfit's entertaining. i'll give you that.

he had to leave early on account of assassination.

it's nice to know you have friends.

i'm here to do what is right.

come on, just answer the question.

they were asking me about you. personal things.

you said we'd be ass-deep in trouble. this is more like knee-high.

so what's your estimation? think we can win?

you can't call me pampered. nobody's peeled a grape for me in weeks.

you startled me. you're always so... nondescript.

you're a special and unique snowflake. live the dream.

i wanted to see you make flowers bloom with your song. just once.

you've done a lot less dancing naked in the moonlight than expected.

i've never seen anyone in this part of the world do it.

i realize there's more to you than that.

have i offended you?

for hating the outdoors, you sure seem to like bad weather.

i can't figure you out, [name].

you don't play their stupid game, they send an assassin or three your way.

i can't believe you're scared of magic.

i'm going to take that as a compliment.

still don't like me, [name]? after all this time?

[name], i owe you an apology.

i suspect people will use any excuse to hate us.

why be ashamed? power should be respected, not swept under the carpet.

maybe you're not a complete moron.

i just need to know you're capable of higher thought. for my own comfort.

it would take work. and soap. lots and lots of soap.

#dragon age #dorian pavus #rp prompt #rp meme #rp memes #roleplay memes #roleplay prompt #rp starters #ask memes #ask meme #roleplay meme #roleplay inbox prompts #rp inbox meme #inbox prompt #inbox meme #sentence starter prompt #sentence starter #sentence starters #mcflymemes #annnndddd a revamped dorian #because i love him so much

[pickastitch]

Hai i want to listen to you talk about gem again. Any thoughts on empires s1 gem ? (If u already told me then tell me again plz n thank u <3 )

confession time, the s1 e!gem that is always brainrotting is pretty different from canon s1 e!gem (from what i can remember) so i'm going to talk about my pantheon au version of gem

i like to think gem would say, "it's free to be a hater" after sausage or fwhip does some stupid shit. on a more serious note, i feel there has to be some genuine resentment towards them two for dragging her into their bs, even if it's not a lot it is there. gem killing sausage in that one important lore bit was so cathartic to her

gem really admires katherine mainly because of how non involved she is with everything. she always feels the need to help everyone (see my gem character analysis post), and the fact that katherine just steps back is enviable to her

in my head, gem also uses a lot more fire magic than she does in the series; this contracts nicely with katherine's nature magic. gandalf, her cat, will decide if they like a person or not, and that will be gem's first impression of a person. it's quite hard to break from it too

now i'm going to dip in to some hc s8 territory, but it will come back to esmp s1. at the start of the series, gem has no clue she is bi and false is actually her gay awakening. gem looks up to her a lot, and she watches her run away and leave her friends behind. this leads to her reaction during the rapture (season ending), where she only takes fwhip because he directly asked, instead of helping out everybody. like come on, they both fly away on their base defining organic

fwhip and gem were royalty, but because gender roles, their parents were forcing gem to be king (trans roseblings tust), gem felt like her only option was to run away. when she finds out about the crown made by fwhip, she is a little uncomfortable with the concept but doesn't say anything. though when others try to convince her she should get it gem is beyond pissed

before she ran away, pearl showed her all about rifts (it has something to do with amethyst shards, but that's a whole different post) and offers to take her to hermitcraft, which she refuses. until she wants to run away and then goes to the place she wants to set up her village and then goes to another world while everyone is searching for her

gem's relationship with shrub is very unique because she so wants to just yell at them for bringing xornoth to the overworld and then spreading it across her place. on the other hand, she sees herself in them as someone who also ran away from home. but then that gets ruined when she is infected with xornoth via shrub

when she still lived with her family, pearl and sausage lived in neighboring empires, and they all grew up together. gem and sausage dated a bit when they were really young, so they are exs on technicality. most of her romantic feelings have gone away, but whenever sausage firts with her, a crush appears for a day and then goes away. she hates this more than anything else. then they grow up, and gem realizes she likes women and then realize she likes pearl specifically. and then pearl and sausage get together (actually qpr, but gem doesn't know that), and she swears off of romance

and the connection to the void and the end and all that stuff is a pretty important part of this au but ehhhh y'know

#geminitay #sage answers questions !! #empires smp #hermitshipping #empireshipping #pantheon au #tldr pantheon au s1 e!gem has very bridled rage and gets absolutely zero game #also i'm like the one person who ships gem x sausage

[ultimatetumblurinatraumatisedkid]

That list doesn’t even cover all of Lloyd’s trauma.

That school was a school meant for bad kids (like to get them to be bad) and everyone bullied him. And the staff encouraged it/did nothing

As soon as he learned his dad actually cared about him and had been trapped in the underworld the whole time he learned he was prophesied to kill him

When he get kidnapped by snakes one of the times they lock him in a cage. He ends up in a volcano and almost drowns in lava

He loses his childhood when a weird spell ages him from 10 to like 17 in a few seconds (plus before that he’s expected to act like a young adult and constantly train. They literally tell a 10 year old to quit playing and reading comics)

In the tournament where he’s forced to fight he gets his powers taken from him and one of his friends starts turning evil from the power of a magic staff. This friend starts to attack them and claim he should be the green ninja

When he fights the guy who was possessing him for a season and forcing him to try to kill his, they fight in the cursed realm. This is where his father is imprisoned and he has to see that and now he can’t help. Also he has to destroy the whole cursed realm which destroys his father too

A girl seduces him and convinces him she loves him just so she can use him to resurrect the evil version of his father. After she does this she tries to kill him and says she never loved him

An army attacks forcing him to team up with the evil version of his dad who literally tells him love and family are useless and he could care less if Lloyd lives or dies. This version of his father also looks at the picture Lloyd has of him with the good version of his father and throws it on the ground breaking the glass (in front of Lloyd while saying caring is stupid)

He literally dies and comes back (long story involving him speaking to ninjago god who is actually his grandfather)

He goes to try and save his friend from the cursed realm and the group splits up so just he gets into the ice emperors palace where he discovers the ice emperor is actually his friend who lost all his memories and went evil. This friend tries to kill him and yells about he he doesn’t know who Lloyd is

There’s other stuff too that’s just a bit more

"There's other stuff too that's just a bit more"

#cw loud #loud tw #holy shit this kid has been through a lot of shit jesus- #ultimate tumblr traumatised kid poll

[children-of-subcon]

FINALLYY the ghost squad has been completed as well >:D I know that I’m a few days late to making it for November but in my defense I’ve been really busy and I got the main part of the ref done in November at least ;w;

I have waited so long to get to this guy... His first design was absolutely abysmal but I’m pretty happy with the final version! Oh gosh I’m gonna have to go back and edit every post I where he was hidden aren’t I o,_,o

ANYWAYS lore under the cut :DDD

The Tricky Merchant, also known as TM or just Timmy, is a notorious salesghost who mainly sells Magnets! Be careful when dealing with him, though... there’s always a 50% chance between him actually giving you the Magnet you asked for, or a completely useless one instead!

He can be found most anywhere, and as such, has quite a wide customer base! His best friends are Captor and Bowthreader, although at the moment he’s a bit closer to Bow. Still, he does hang around Cappy quite a bit, and has helped her with a couple of Magnets of her own :)

TM’s arms can be...rather wonky. He’s able to touch magical objects, but physical objects evade him. Usually this doesn’t bother him, though, since he can just levitate them instead! Too bad he can’t levitate himself u_u

He comes from the Twilight, a place for lost souls that have managed to get even more corrupted, even after death. With the help of someone else, he managed to escape– the glitches are a side effect.

Timmy loves “ligma” type jokes, and is ecstatic when he meets Prince because he’s stupid enough to fall for every single one of them ^^ Luckily, when Prince finally manages to catch on is when Duke comes around, so TM gets a new target :D !

Although not as frequently as Captor, TM does eat souls! Usually it’s those of annoying customers or people who try to get out of paying, though. Don’t try to scam the scammer, folks! Outside of these he probably gets them from animals.

Despite his upbeat and mischievous demeanor, Timmy has a deep-seated fear of being forgotten. It’s the reason that he goes around meeting so many people, and uses his rather...unconventional business practices. Yet, while he has many acquaintances, he doesn’t have many friends. Perhaps some certain aliens can help with that...

His theme would obviously use some motifs from the Badge Seller’s, as well as maybe the Main Theme and Spaceship Theme? I’m not sure if it would fit, but I think it could involve some nods to some of the music from Vanessa’s/Muriel’s Manor as well, since he originally was supposed to live there :D

Also, he claims to be a demon. He is not.

Alllright, that’s all for Tricky Merchant! Will I make another ref for December or just count this one? Who knows ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

#If you're wondering what he does with all that money #He's saving up for a ps5 :D #Also he's red bc he's supposed to sort of emulate the dwellers in the twilight bell? #And kind of mirror mu like bow mirrors captor #USAU #A Hat in Time #AHiT #ahit au #ahit Timmy #ahit Hat Kid #ahit Bow Kid #ahit Mustache Girl #ahit Prince #idc if they're small they're THERE okay

[sucreboy-blog]

Little worms in my brain (Jon and Martin TOH setting)

No manches! For those who haven't seen TOH “Watching and Dreaming”, the Collector's brothers are called Archivists, and do you know who else is also Archivist? Exactly! Our dearest favorite neurotic and paranoid: Jonathan “Jon” Sims AKA The Archivist.

I just finished the episode so I'm really excited rn but but but, imagine the following scenario…

-Jon is an Archivist who ended up stranded for reason A or B, in one of the different realms they travel and cannot return to his brothers.

-Martin finds Jon and takes care of him, Jon is very confused about what is happening.

-Angst with comfort(optional).

-End

With this scenario we can find several premises:

1) Martin is a witch in the times before Emperor Belos, in other words, they still practiced wild magic (I guess from the period where Luz and Lilith met Philip). Jon is an Archivist, he travels with his brothers collecting, documenting and preserving specimens, information and knowledge, these last two on which Jon focuses the most.

Jon ends up for some reason landing on the Boiling Isles, confused and having zero knowledge of how to live in society (he may Know a lot, but knowing social cues is not one of their strong suits), he goes and does something stupid.

Martin seeing this man (person who presents as masculine? Or non-binary?) infuriating all of the people he speaks with, decides to help him when things started to get a little too violent.

Jon (although he doesn't really know himself as Jon at the time) outraged decides to use his powers to get back to his brothers or maybe teach Martin or the others a lesson but surprise surprise, they don't work.

2) This setting is similar to the first one but set-in a modern human world, not really as medieval as the first but similar premise.

In this case, I imagine Martin as a customer service worker, he arrives at work (it can be a cafe, a self-service store, a McDonald's, etc.) and sees the most beautiful man(?) he has ever seen in his life, but he is dressed a really strange clothes (facial make included?) and talking non sense at his co-worker.

Jon does something stupid, the usual, tries to cross the street, almost gets run over, says the wrong thing to the wrong people, and Martin like the good samaritan he is, helps him. Jon gets mad and surprise surprise, again, his powers don't work.

(My mind runs through different scenarios of Martin teaching Jon how the human realm works, maybe set in Gravesfield or London but they end up going to Gravesfield to find a way to get Jon back home, meeting Luz and the others in the process?)

3) This scenario is a bit different than the previous two and it deviates from the orginal formula.

They're archivists, so I would imagine they must have their own archive or some kind of community archive, and they obviously employ assistants. So Martin is someone who ended up as an assistant to an Archivist after his dimension was "archived" by them.

There may also be different scenarios, but these are the three main ones that I feel I've the most developed, although we must not limit ourselves to these.

It could be that Jon was attracted to the Fears from the original TMA universe and wanted to classify them but got caught by mistake (Elias involved because he obviously wants to take advantage of Jon, dominate the world classic), or a completely different fantasy or sci-fi world where events happen more similar to the first scenario but with their own different set of rules.

From here you can add as much "spark" as you want. Elias manipulative? Of course! Either as an archivist brother or as a person who wants to take advantage of Jon. Peter? depending on the version there may even be Dad!Peter and it also depends on your level of self-inflicted masochism Dad!Peter can be a distant father (or father figure) trying to connect with his son or just pure Angst.

Tim, Sasha, Melanie, Georgie, Basira and Daisy? Of course! Add them as witches, demons, humans, etc.

Tim and Sasha can be humans, so are Melanie and Georgie but they, especially Melanie, have their youtube channel on paranormal investigation. And Basira and Daisy would be in the demon realm (Obviously if premise 2 or variations is chosen).

Add different avatars that can be friends or enemies, put all this together and have fun!

I was really excited, sorry, I have zero motivation and concentration to write a story like this, but I wanted to share:)

#the magnus archives #the owl house #listen listen Im not crazy I SWEAR

[redemptioninchaos]

Abandoned Mask + Mask’s Calling

A character I no longer roleplay

I can't think of any character who 100 percent fits this question, so I'll give you two characters who sort of do for half credit each

The first one who comes to mind is one you know very well: Geronimo Sang, basically an Indy/Nathan Drake expy from Miami. Born in Britain, moved to the States with his wealthy family, and became an investor as part of his family's firm, Hughes and Son. Had a brother named Rafael with whom he shared a bit of a rivalry. When he's not doing investment work, he's adventuring for the heck of it, and he had a proficiency with both shotguns and rifles. His longtime enemies were the Masons, a secret society who controlled many things behind the scenes and were always one step behind Geronimo as he collected the McGuffin for the week.

Since then, I evolved him into another character, Augustus Hughes, who was involved in Colette's original big project I did with @canuck-sweets33 over half a decade ago. He was still the son of a wealthy business magnate, but this time he was a necromancer who could speak with the dead and possessed light and dark magic capabilities. Like Geronimo, he was still an anthro wolf, but I made him American. Instead of the adventurous spirit his original incarnation was, he was nervous, mild-mannered, and generally wanted to remain uninvolved with anything troublesome. However, trouble found him anyway when he married the love of his life, Annette Wise. On the day of his wedding, malevolent spirits terrorized the Stockholm church, killing three and injuring dozens. Augustus, along with his just-married wife, brother-in-law, and Colette, defeated the spirits and the source of them all, but it was a pyrrhic victory in what would become later known as the Black Wedding.

From that point, I've since evolved him again in the project you and I are working on collaboratively, Blazing Tails. Both of us know what we intend to do with him, but for everyone else...imagine if Saul Goodman were a necromancer on the side.

The second is Reagan Masters, werewolf library worker. He disagreed with his local werewolf pack regarding relations between werewolves and everyone else. He opposed the current werewolf leader in a sort of election, voicing his concerns that antagonizing everyone else wouldn't do much to help anyone. His opponent had a more "pro-werewolf" outlook and claimed that the pack needed to focus on protecting itself, even at the cost of non-lycan lives. This Reagan left the werewolf clan, drove a Prius to work every day, and largely kept to himself, "lone-wolfing" it, as it were. I hadn't seen Underworld, but I thought it was the coolest thing ever to have a werewolf fall in love with some vampire chick, and I thought it'd never been done before.

Man, I was stupid in high school.

Not much happened with Reagan on Tumblr (I remember some guy on here saying "I really don't give a shit about Masters" straight to me, so there's that), but what was really popping off was the RPs that astronaut-max and I did on Facebook, back when I still used it. Reagan fell in with two druids, a germaphobic academic and a lanky stoner, and got into some wacky adventures, including one where Reagan twerked and performed "My Bubble Gum" by Rasheeda to distract an eldritch abomination long enough to ensure he and his friends could escape with their lives.

The RP was named "Claw and Order," and while I may cringe at the ideas I thought were fire back then, I figure it was good I had those experiences. It goes to show how far I've come as a writer. Max made a character who's still referenced to this day. ("Dylan! You son of a bitch!") There was even an AU where our characters were put in the world of Bullworth Academy, where Gary was a self-proclaimed "alpha" werewolf. The original verse of Claw and Order saw Reagan in his early 20s. I've since then stopped RPing this version of Reagan, but I kept a few ideas for his current evolution. Now, Reagan is in his 40s and is a supervisor in a subdivision of the FBI called the Supernatural Investigation Network, or SIN. Colette and others work for a private society unconnected to the federal government that straight up dispatches magical threats. The feds didn't like the idea of such a secretive society dealing with everything magical, so they made their own society that focuses on investigation instead of assassination.

Reagan deals with magical occurrences around the East Coast, primarily in Philadelphia. For roughly a week every month, he shifts into his werewolf form at night involuntarily, but investigations still need to be done and bills still need to be paid. He'd put on a few pounds since his younger days, but he's still a formidable hand-to-hand fighter when it comes down to it. The keyboard in his office, as well as the laptop he carries, has myriad scratch marks on it, but at least his computers can recognize the tone of his growls whenever he has to work when he's shifted.

Typically, I only play him in human verses instead of anthro verses, especially in verses where Sergio is a vampire hunter.

A character I'm on the fence about RPing

I have several characters I'm on the fence about RPing in an official capacity. Reagan is actually one of them. I'll need to do some tweaking for him before rolling out the red carpet for him, but I get the feeling a werewolf DILF shouldn't be too hard to garner attention for.

I've already RPed as Grollor's father Grollark a few times, but I haven't made a page for him yet. If enough people want to interact with a 50-something orc pirate who loves his wife, kid, and pet a whole lot, that could be a possibility.

And even though I have a page for her, I'm still on the fence about Qisalor. Considering how she's the main villain in the first DND campaign, you'd think I'd want to use her more, but for whatever reason I've just not had any muse for her. She just doesn't feel interesting at the moment, and canonically she wouldn't talk to so many people's muses since they're humans. Heck, she'd probably just try to kill them on sight if they approached her. Because of that, I could see how Qisalor might not be anyone's first pick. So, I'll put her on hiatus for the moment until I come up with some more Qisa-lore.

[ladala99]

One Spyro Level a Month Until the Next Spyro Game Releases - January 2024 - Artisans Homeworld

Intro/rules

Next Level

(Shh. Pretend it's January)

Complete with awful pictures I took of my PSP screen.

"Looks like I've got some things to do!"

Nestor

The game places you right in the line of sight of the first dragon in the game: Nestor. Just walk forward to investigate, and as you touch the platform, he is freed!

Nestor gives you the run-down: you can't fight Gnasty yet - you must find dragons first. That is our first goal.

As a kid, I thought Nestor was Spyro's dad.

From Nestor's platform, there are several interesting ways to go. There's a castle up ahead, enemies on the hill over there, a maze, and even more if you look around.

And hoo boy, even just getting to Nestor, I could feel the difference in the controls. Spyro is the default game I'll play when I'm feeling down, and since Reignited came out, I've been playing that version. The controls are so different, particularly how fast Spyro turns.

Anyway, what I did was head right back where I came from and over to the next dragon in front of this funky-looking waterfall.

Delbin

Where does the water go? Who knows! Maybe there's a drain underneath. Maybe there's some magic involved.

Anyway, Delbin tells you about Sparx. And if you decide to take a swim in the water behind him, you really get to know what Sparx does. Notably, Delbin only tells you that Sparx is "helping and protecting you." Which isn't all that helpful. But you know, I respect the game telling you to figure it out on your own. Eventually we'll get more details.

The way this conversation goes down is really weird in a lore perspective. Like Spyro has no idea there's a dragonfly following him, what its doing, or what its name is. Or maybe he does and he thinks its such a stupid question he doesn't even know how to begin.

Not pictured: the Gem Thief Gnorc.

Weirdly unique, this guy requires three attacks before he can be fully defeated. Perhaps he is meant to help you learn how to fight.

The Maze

I went into the maze to grab the gems and extra life inside. It's not a very big or effective maze - it just gets the point across. Probably just meant to be pretty.

Also, did you know - the Gnorcs will all go off to specific locations. Follow them to find interesting portions of the level!

Alongside the maze...

There's one in the castle,

One past the tunnel, and,

One in the middle of the rising columns!

While we're in the rising column area, that's another thing this level does well. It gives you some low-stakes challenges to get you used to the controls. The rising columns teach you how to jump and move in 3D, as you must go in a circle to reach all of them and the gems on top.

Also, not pictured, is the platform next to the castle wall that you must glide to from the hill. If you can make that jump, you can make any jump in the game. It requires a mastery of gliding at height, and you will probably not be reaching it until later in the game your first time playing.

Inside the castle, I got some treasure and spoke to the balloonist. He told me to come back when I get 10 dragons. I briefly considered taking his advice, but honestly, I want to do all the levels before moving on. I feel the pacing would be weird to backtrack towards the end of the game.

Argus

I next headed over to the side area, where Argus is trapped. He will tell you about bosses. This boss uses a feature not used until the end of the game: you must exit one of the other levels through the exit whirlwind in order for this portal to unlock. Probably so that you don't try to tackle the boss the first thing.

Argus is unique in that he has two lines of dialogue - if you reach him before you go to another land like I did, he will tell you that you are not yet ready and must complete one of the other Artisan lands. If you free him (or replay his cutscene) after you accomplish that, he will tell you that you may go in if you feel you are ready.

After freeing him, I looked around a bit, wondering what I missed, before remembering I hadn't actually gone into the area after the tunnel outside of following the gnorc. Whoops!

Tomas

Tomas makes fun of you. At least, I always interpreted it that way. He tells you not to be afraid of falling, but he says it in a way that he seems to think that you already are.

He's in front of an area you definitely should not be afraid to fall off of, because aside from dying in bottomless pits, you don't take fall damage.

This area shows you that this game will have a lot of verticality, and tests your platforming skills. It's a good practice for later levels, like almost everything in Artisans Homeworld.

Artisans Homeworld complete! With that, we are two percent of the way through the game.

Lore talk

Lots of gameplay analysis above, but what about lore? What is this place?

Well, I believe that it is a dragon-controlled area and a port of trade, as evidenced by the portals and the pier the balloonist stands on.

The whole area is built to look friendly. There are pretty pink flowers planted throughout, and various structures around that just look pretty. This is where the Artisan dragons show off their skills.

The balloonists are the only non-dragon friendlies in the game, and they all won't help you until you help the local dragon population. The one here won't help until you free ten dragons - he needs his customers to be free! Perhaps he feels they'll protect him a bit better than the little guy that is Spyro.

The enemy gnorcs also tell a story throughout the game. This is early on in Gnasty's takeover, and his warriors here are afraid for their newly-gained lives at the sight of an enemy. They have no weapons, and they just run away and tremble in place.

Starting to overthink it - early open-world game design

You know how in Breath of the Wild, you exit the Great Plateau and there are all these interesting sights in the distance, beckoning you towards them? That's exactly how this level is shaped.

Where will you go first? The castle? The maze? Will you follow the enemies? Do you want to know what's in that dragon head? Or will you just throw yourself into that portal sitting out in the open?

There weren't that many 3D games out by the time this one entered the fray, and a lot of even those were pretty linear (for example, Crash and Croc). It's pretty incredible that Insomniac had this basic piece of 3D worldbuilding figured out already.

And well, maybe they actually didn't, because Spyro 2 and 3's first homeworlds are not built this way at all. And even later levels in this game become a lot more linear, with side paths feeling more like secrets than choices.

But here, now? The world is your oyster. Go wherever you feel most drawn towards.

For me? I'm going in the most logical order. February's level will be Stone Hill.

Next Level

#spyro #spyro the dragon #one spyro level a month until the next spyro game releases

[trutrustories]

Bad fighter Mobius M. Mobius is the best kind of Mobius M. Mobius, Actually.

I already loved Mobius more than most of the MCU characters before episode 6 came out, but THAT scene in Ravonna´s Office was really game changer for me. Until then I was actually sure, that this man is a great fighter. Because HOW THE FUCK COULD HE NOT BE, RIGHT? I mean...

he looks so sure of himself, He´s going on those missions with trained hunters all the time, he´s fearless! And then Ravonna says: “even with that, you´re of no danger to me” And I was like: Ha! keep dreaming girl He´ll show you! And Mobius was like: “Is that what you think? Let´s see..” And I was like: Yeeees that´s my boyyyyy!!!”

And then Ravonna was like...

Mobius in the air in like a split of second. And I was like 

But Mobius freaking smiled and was like: “Yeah you were right”

ok. OK. HE´S MY FUCKING FAVOURITE NOW. THERE IS NO ONE BETTER THEN HIM SORRY.  Suddenly I was lost. I was blown away. It was HE BETTER STAYS IN MCU FOREVER OR I WILL SCREAM type of feeling. So let me get this straight. He can´t fight. He probably knows that he is not a good fighter, and he...  HOLY SHIT. THE WHOLE SERIES IS SO MUCH BETTER!!! .... As much as I love the idea of strong Mobius with long hair and daggers, looking for Loki through entire universe… I´m not sure, if I really want to see that in canon. I just love this cute and non-combatant version of Mobius too much, I´m sorry! Let me explain my weird brain please: we have lots of strong heroes in MCU – those who are great fighters, or those who had to learn how to fight.   The one thing I always loved about Iron man was the fact, that he really needed his brilliant brain, his technology (suit) and bravery to fight. And in the end he was the hero who saved them all. I mean… yeah. There are side-kicks, like Happy Hogan, or Luis (Ant man´s best friend) and I LOVE them! But none of them has got as much screen time and importance, as Mobius. When I think about what I love so much about him and his dynamic with Loki, there is always this one thing that prevails: one of them is an incredibly strong but also very careful god (not when he´s drunk though) who uses a lots of strategies and plans, while the other is a tiny man in a suit who can´t fight shit but runs into the throat of a danger every chance he get and no one can´t stop him. just look at him!!!

He goes on missions with these trained hunters to just look around for clues and has no concerns about potentional harm whatsoever.

And he even finds the time to stand up for normal people and be kind to them in the process:

Once Loki has no collar, on his neck he could break all Mobius´s limbs in a matter of seconds if he wanted to, but Mobius is completely sure he has nothing to worry about around his Loki. He´s not scared of ANYTHING, especially  of Loki variants. Like EVER! :D

let me break it down in detail for ya. I made a list: When they are taking Loki on his first mission outside, Loki asks, if no one is concerned that he is going to has his magic back...

well, maybe someone actually is concerned by that but it sure as hell isn´t Mobius. He just simply says that he could get Loki to Time keepers if he won´t try anything and like... this one line is getting on Loki so much, that Loki even tries to use it few moments latter xD And here is the best scene ever: 

LOKI: “we can go anywhere!” 

MOBIUS: “I´m not taking you for a stroll along the promenade, much less an apocalypse” FEW MOMENTS LATTER:

Hang on. Wait. So you telling me, he took this man outside without  permission, without backup (you know, hunters, that actually CAN fight), right to the apocalypse, knowing that Loki can use his powers anytime, however he wants.  It´s just...  God. I love him!!! And then he just hands him the daggers like it´s no big deal!

Like are we all aware this man has no any super powers, no big strength, nor any impressive fighting skills and he is willing to give him daggers for a mission, where this god is capable of magic and everyone else in team ECCEPT mobius is at least able to fight????? And he just has that small bulletproof vest,  and a raincoat and he chats with Loki in a rain like it was a fucking another apocalyptic DATE?

Ok. Let´s jump to the episode four He goes and persuades Ravonna to let him interrogate Sylvie and he is straight up arguing with her, even when he´s told how dangerous Sylvie is. This man LOVES danger!!! 

Once he has doubts he  decides to risk it all and  swaps TemPads right behind Ravonnas back. 

And he is watching it OUT LOUD in a place where anyone can show up at anytime! 

no but serously. This is a face of a man who is EXCITED for a dangerous adventures with Loki. Yeah, lets bring this whole place down together! 

And then we have this scene. Mobius really has a nerves to pull “ ha ha I had to take it by mistake” line right there. 

But once he understand he´s gonna die, he just take his fate with bravery and talks to Ravonna about life he really desires. 

And remember that time Ravonna warned him about this variant and how dangerous she is?  He casually saves her, just like that. No big deal. 

He even has a time to make teasing notes about how  Sylvie should be more careful jumping to a strangers car like that and how she really is one of the Lokis. 

And after he saves her, he manage to apologize to her  and make her to like him. EVERY FREAKING LOKI LIKES HIM! - that has to be his super power I swear And then Sylvie is like: well actually let´s go back there, I think It´s the best idea ever.  And mobius is like:  What back to the angry cloud? - oh great. fuck this why the hell not. Lets do it. 

so... while Loki and Sylvie are getting closer, lets show us, how literally every Loki likes Mobius (like not even alligator loki wants to hurt him, even when Mobius suggests that he is a liar I CAN´T) And just random (AGAIN) during the chat  saving Loki and Sylvie (without even knowing) when he inspires Classic Loki to change. 

He offers free tickets straght to the TVA to kid Loki, classic Loki and an alligator. I mean... What a LEGEND. 

when he gets there he just knock on Ravonna´s door and is like - lets talk about it xDD

And he isn´t even suprised to lose that fight. He makes himself comfortable on the floor: yeah you were right. Here we go again. Just prune me already, doesn´t matter, I have my Lokis there anyway.

But make no mistake, I don´t think he is stupid, or naive. That is the most fascinating thing about him.  He is brilliant. He can makes great plans (it surely as hell was him, who come up with the high school scheme) He is a great  investigator, he  is familiar with psychology very well, he know how to manipulate people just as well, as Loki. He can  interrogate flawlessly (when jealousy is not involved) And when he woke up in the Void, he was able to escape certain death, choose a car and drive around looking for Loki - and eventualy save Sylvie. He is a very capable man. I dont think he shouldn´t have any power. Like - he has his inteligence, his knowledge of all  languages  (I want to see him chat with Groot please), his knowledge of psychology,  knowledge  of how TVA works... He can have his pruning stick, TemPad, bulletproof vest and a raincoat for what I care. but most importantly he has his kind heart, love of adrenaline, and he is a freaking Loki expert. And let´s not forget, every Loki loves him. Also, he has a damn luck as well :D It´s like - Loki always ends up loosing, so Mobius  is fine  - even when he should be dead about million times already. (one man´s void is another man´s piece of cake) So when they are togheter. There is no way for Loki to actually die. Not by his side xD So I don´t think he needs to become great fighter. I believe, that this is a hundred times better. Creators should explore this dynamic to it´s bottom before they make him fighter with super powers or something like that. ( I wouldn´t mind long hair though)  I´m sorry. But I just really love that. I love how small and fragile he is, but he wont be scared of anything. And now he´s Loki best friend (while having masive crush on him, let's be precise ) So just imagine all those amazing scenes that could come with that.  Imagine there is some very dangerous Loki variant that everyone has problem to deal with, and Mobius is gonna be like - you´re so cute guys, nice try. Now let me talk to him, will ya.  Imagine some big battle where our Loki and Mobius are fighting side by side with Avengers and Loki is using all his potential, and he is so stunning in his leather but he can´t focus very well, because few metters from him is a small, fragile man in a suit just using TemPad an afucking pruning stick. And Loki didn´t even want him there in the first place. So they are arguing like married couple right then and there and every avenger AND enemy in  close distance just can´t believe these two are real.  also Loki saves Mobius by taking him in his arms right on time and running to safety with him

Maybe this post is  completely useless and has  incredibly bad english like every text I write, but I don´t care. I just wanted to loudly  appreciate this mans non-fighting skills and his hilariously huge courage. End of the post.  have nice day! Bye!

#Loki #loki series #loki laufeyson #Mobius #mobius m mobius #loki spoilers #lokius #loki and mobius #i love him okay #He is the best character marvel ever created #longpost #long post

[ouijaban]

Glaciator 2.0 Summary

For all the Miraculous fans who don't speak French and are struggling to understand, here's a basic summary of the episode:

Ladybug and Chat Noir are arguing in the beginning because they were named "couple of the year" when they're not a couple. Ladybug becomes very angry with him (and with everyone else involved), and, seeing this, Chat resolves to respect her feelings and fall out of love with her, but this makes him very sad. There's a brief sad montage, Adrien deletes all the Ladybug computers off his desktop and watches a news report (which Marinette also watches and fumes about) and there's a tense conversation between Adrien and Kagami where he says that no one can help him with what he's going through, at the end of which Adrien is almost akumatised, which shocks Papillon. Meanwhile, Kagami accosts Marinette and tells her she needs to confess to Adrien because he's depressed. She gives her the advice to write a dramatic speech, which she then does.

While on the phone trying to get billboards depicting them kissing taken down, she sees Adrien crying in the park, and is going to give him a present out of the one's she's accumulated (it's cookware and not a hamster) but fumbles it, and he gets driven away by the Gorilla on Gabriel's orders. When he gets back, Gabriel awkwardly gives him an "I'm there for you, sorry I've been a bad dad since your mother" speech, but Adrien brushes him off, surprising Plagg, who thinks his cold family situation will potentially improve. After looking at a photo of his mom and resolving to not end up like his father, Adrien goes out as Chat to destroy the kissing billboards and demonstrate his respect for Ladybug.

Marinette can't figure out who to practice her speech with (it's really bad, some gibberish about how on the first day they met she saw three suns I think) but she sees Chat Noir doing this from her balcony and flags him down to play the role of her "boyfriend who's not yet her boyfriend" (lmao)

Basically they goof around and banter a lot– she won't say the name of the person she's talking about (ofc) so she at first addresses the confession to Chat Noir, which confuses him, and then replaces Adrien's name with "Buttercup," which makes him laugh and she gets mad because he's making the wrong faces in response and being a bad actor. He reads the speech aloud and she realises how stupid it sounds. Anyway, after rehearsal goes poorly, Chat proposes they take a break and so they go to the cinema. André gets the wrong idea and thinks it's a date, and gets mad because according to him Ladybug and Chat Noir are meant for each other, not him and Marinette.

At the cinema, neither of them like the movie. Marinette explains how she overthinks everything and so the version of her that comes out around everyone isn't the real her but rather a highly practiced one, and then the guy behind them yells at them to shut up. They leave, and it's raining so Chat uses the baton as an umbrella. He then says he's the opposite to her, and he can't help but say things even though he knows he shouldn't, speaking about his constant confessions to Ladybug. He says she hates him now, and Marinette immediately says that she doesn't, and that he's a good kitty 🥺😭

When they get back to the balcony, Glaciator accosts them and accuses them of being a couple, and Chat says he'll come back to rehearse again.

Ladybug shows up and they fight him; the whole time, Chat is correcting himself about what's ok and what's not ok to say to her now that they're just friends– for example, using "us" for him and Ladybug, calling her my lady, etc, but he's going overboard. Ultimately they beat Glaciator, give him the Magical Charm, and the two of them part on good terms, and Chat returns to the balcony to finish up the rehearsal. Marinette reads a few lines and then acknowledges that her speech is bad, and gives one from the heart instead.

In essence, what she says is that she had the wrong impression when she and the guy she likes first met, she took him for someone who was pretentious, but after getting to know him she's learned how kind he is, and is very much in love with him despite struggling to communicate that effectively. Chat is obviously moved by this (and like 2 seconds away from figuring out who she's talking about). They part happily– both saying that the person the other loves is lucky to have them, basically– and it cuts to a scene at fencing, where Adrien is killing it and no longer depressed.

Kagami asks Marinette if she confessed, to which Marinette essentially replies sort of but not really. Then it's revealed that Kagami's seduction technique came from a shoujo manga and Marinette tells her she needs to hang out with her and the gang more (lmao)

Meanwhile, Adrien restores the Ladybug photos he deleted off his computer earlier, and explains to Plagg that he's not going to give up his love for Ladybug. He says that Marinette opened his eyes, and that if he shows Ladybug the "Adrien" side of him rather than only the guise of Chat Noir, maybe she'll fall in love with him.

And that's it! Let me know if you have any specific French questions. If I missed anything, I apologise; this is entirely from memory, so there are definitely scenes I didn't describe in adequate detail.

#glaciator 2.0 #glaciator 2.0 spoilers #miraculous s4 spoilers #marichat #ladynoir #adrinette #ladrien #mlb #marinette dupain cheng #adrien agreste

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

So...Misery style, how would you make Tomione work? (Or how would you do a Tomione story?)

Thanks, Anon, this might be harder than the Dramione one.

Well, again, to please my deranged captor, I'd likely follow the plot of your standard Tomione fic and hope it passes muster. "Oh yeah, Hermione's back in time and she's doing back and forth mind games with Tom and it's really intellectual." With any luck, my feet aren't smashed into oblivion.

But I think you're trying to get at what I would really do if I really had to write Tom/Hermione and I had to make it something I would read. At least, that seems to be the spirit of this ask.

So, we're going the thriller route people. A lot like Misery, actually.

Instead of Ginny, twelve-year-old Hermione picks up the diary. Like Ginny, Hermione quickly becomes besotted with Tom Riddle trapped inside. However, unlike Ginny, Hermione goes straight to the library and starts asking pesky questions.

Hermione's never heard of memories stored in objects before, the theory behind portraits and pensieves are completely different, what spells did Tom use and where did he find them? Did Tom Riddle invent an entirely new branch of magic at the age of 16 without anyone noticing? What was Tom's special service to the school?

Tom starts sweating when it becomes clear that Hermione's stumbling a bit too close to the truth (that this is not ordinary magic and highly dangerous shit) and that she's clearly going to start asking around about Tom Riddle (to Dumbledore, McGonagall, and Hagrid, who were all near Hogwarts at the same time Tom was going to school).

Tom confesses that he may have created the diary using something very... illegal. Hermione is appalled and asks if it was gasp dark magic! He admits it is but points out it's a bit late now, like it or not, he's stuck in the diary and running to Dumbledore isn't going to make that go away any time soon. And it wasn't like Tom asked to be shoved in a diary either.

Hermione's very conflicted, on the one hand, Tom's the first real intellectual friend she's ever had. Harry and Ron are nice, but they're morons and they thinks he's a nerd. Tom encourages her intellectual pursuits and confirms her concern over various what not and what have you happening in Hogwarts.

Eventually, Hermione decides that Tom in the diary can't help being a diary (though the other Tom, the real Tom, she'd have words with), and decides that she'll try to help him get a body.

Great, that's great, Tom says.

But it keeps getting worse.

Tom tries to possess Hermione, but unlike Ginny, Hermione knows that Tom is a dangerous, dark, artifact. If she's suffering negative health effects, losing her memory and ending up in the girl's lavatory, she's going to research this and decide that either a) she's suffering ill effects of using dark magic b) she just got possessed by Tom.

Either way, she tells him she can't use the diary anymore, it's affecting her health and she must research. Well, Hermione researching does Tom no fucking good, but he can't stop her.

The Chamber of Secrets, as a result, is never opened.

Instead, Hermione continues researching, and Harry and Ron... begin to get on her nerves. It's not like last year, there's no Flamel to research, no over-arching mystery, and they seem to be growing tired of her. In turn, Hermione's getting a little tired of quidditch, getting detention, etc.

She's a little tired of Hogwarts, if she's being honest with herself.

Hermione's now had a taste of having a friend who isn't there to simply use her brains. And it's very addicting. She decides not to tell Ron and Harry about Tom, they'd just get needlessly concerned (the irony of this isn't lost on her but what can you do)

In the end, she opens back up the diary, and point blank asks what Tom needs to get a body. Before Tom can tell her, Hermione lists out her own theories. Life cannot be created from nothing, golems and puppets cannot last in the long term, to get a real body... human sacrifice is on the table, isn't it?

Well shit, Tom thinks to himself. He tries to assure Hermione it isn't but ends up confessing that, well, yes, it kind of is.

They have another huge row about it, Hermione slams the diary shut, but the wheels in her brain are spinning.

Does anyone deserve to die?

Hermione, at first, adamantly tells herself the answer is no. No one deserves to be sacrificed. Tom's fate is cruel, but the original Tom made his bed and should lie in it. It's unfortunate, but that's just life. Not the diary's fault, of course, but nothing that can be helped.

But then she keeps thinking about it.

Malfoy struts through the school like a peacock, sneering every time he sees her, laughing every time Snape deducts points from her in Potions for being a 'smarmy know-it-all'. Every time he can get away with it he's shoving her in hallways, calling her a mudblood, and assuring her that she's worth less than the dirt beneath her feet.

She watches as Malfoy torments and bullies Harry, she looks at Draco's father, and she asks herself if the world would really be so much worse off if Draco Malfoy were to disappear?

Draco Malfoy's being groomed to use dark magic, he practically brags about it at every opportunity, why is his life worth more than Tom Riddle's, someone who has paid the price for dark magic?

Isn't Hermione, in a roundabout way, only giving Draco what he deserves? The fate he'd meet at some point in the not so distant future?

Draco does something phenomenally cruel and stupid to the trio, likely to Harry, and that settles it. Hermione's going to murder that motherfucker and get Tom Riddle a body.

Hermione tells Tom the plan, she's passing off the diary to Draco, she has her full blessing, her permission, and whatever help he requires from her to eat Draco Malfoy alive.

Tom is unwillingly impressed, he was a vicious gremlin as a twelve-year-old, but even he wasn't committing murder in cold blood.

Tom's not sure how he feels about murdering a Malfoy, that's bound to get noticed, but Hermione's unyielding. Draco Malfoy, or Hermione goes to Dumbledore.

So, Draco Malfoy it is.

The rest of the year is spent with Tom Riddle murdering Draco Malfoy and coming up with some excuse for his disappearance. The chamber isn't opened as Hermione reminds Tom that this would make it entirely too obvious who is behind this. Instead, Tom likely has Draco partake in increasingly erratic schemes to humiliate Harry Potter that end up endangering himself.

Near the end of school, Draco disappears into the Forbidden Forest to find acromantulas to put in Potter's bed and... never comes back.

A huge search is put on, Draco Malfoy is never found, and the acromantula infestation in the forest is now actively battled by ministry employees. Dumbledore is sacked as headmaster, Hagrid fired for having been responsible for the acromantulas in the first place, and Hogwarts is closed the following year.

Hermione is... conflicted about all of this. She certainly didn't mean to fire Hagrid (had no idea he was even remotely involved with the acromantulas) and certainly not Dumbledore. It wasn't Dumbledore's fault at all.

Tom, who is now a free man but has no idea what to do with himself, meets up with Hermione and points out that Dumbledore should have been sacked ages ago: he let kids get away with this stupidly dangerous shit and the year before actively endangered his students and lured a dark wizard into the castle. As for Hagrid, he raised a dragon illegally on school grounds, did release his pet acromantula into the wild, and more. They were terrible at their jobs.

Hermione, ever so reluctantly, agrees.

It's too bad though, Hagrid was very nice and Dumbledore's a great wizard (don't even get Tom started).

As for Tom, well, he had such dreams. Of course he planned to either meet up with his glorious self or (upon learning that Voldemort was blown up by a toddler) take the mantle of Voldemort for himself. But now that he's out, he has no idea where to start. Murder Harry Potter, certainly, but after that?

Tom only has the vaguest idea of who the original Death Eaters were, and they seem to have effectively scattered. More, how does he go about this? Sure, Tom had ideas when he was in school, but they were just ideas. He's never led a revolution before, has no idea how to impersonate an older, more knowledgeable, version of himself. He barely understands the political climate in this new, post-Voldemort, Britain.

Tom keeps hanging around Hermione because, well, inertia. He has no idea what else to do. (Hermione, while still torn over the consequences of her actions as well as the distant thought that she enabled murder, is quite delighted to have him around).

Tom tries to wheedle Harry's address out of Hermione and gets a lot more information than he bargained for. Harry lives with abusive muggle relatives, Dumbledore is apparently keeping him there, all of this sounds bizarre. Tom is officially weirded out.

Still wants to murder Harry, of course, but also wants to dig into this a little further...

And before this becomes a full on fic outline, eventually this will lead to the murder of Dumbledore, probably the murder of Ron when Ron inadvertently discovers 'the truth', Hermione telling Tom they're now an item, Tom trying to escape the relationship, only to learn there's no escaping Hermione.

Hermione becomes the next dark lord. Tom has no idea how this even happened.

#harry potter #harry potter meta #harry potter headcanon #harry potter shipping #hermione granger #anti hermione granger #tom riddle #hermione/tom #anti hermione/tom #meta #headcanon #opinion #shipping

[absolutepokemontrash]

The Demon Bros Play DND!

Who’s ready for some Stupid Headcanons?

So, the Satanic Panic of the 1980s claimed that the tabletop RPG known as Dungeons and Dragons had the power to turn your children into satanists and devil worshippers. So of course, the brothers have totally played DND after hearing about all the human world nonsense.

Lucifer the Back-up Back-up DM

He’s too busy to play this game dammit, stop inviting him! What do you mean both Satan and Simeon can’t DM the one-shot? Ugh... fine.

Despite all his UUUUUUUUGGGGHHH, Lucifer is a damn good storyteller, prepare to be immersed as hell.

Also, sorry guys, he’s a rule whore. If something’s against the rules, YOU AREN’T DOING IT.

He’s also a complete sadist who will randomly get everyone to roll perception checks for NO REASON.

Lucifer has definitely stood up and slammed his hands on the table while giving a description for extra effect, Mammon screamed and nearly fell out of his seat which REALLY ruined the mood.

“Everyone, we’re rescheduling, I’m too busy.”

He’s been a player a few times, and he’s NOT good at it. All his characters end up being really generic and boring. He’s better at being the world and everything in it, not the dummy wandering around it.

Human/fighter lookin’ motherfucker

In conclusion, he’s a good DM, but he’s probably too busy to play.

Over-Powered Self Insert (Mammon)

This game is for nerds! He’s not playin’, Levi!

Fine, his character is great and amazin’ and is also him. MC! What do these numbers mean-

Mammon’s the type of player to make his character a self insert and not take it too seriously, then get really REALLY attached as the campaign progresses.

He’s the type not to make a backstory for his character either, so go wild DM MCs!

He also both purposefully and accidentally metagames a whole bunch. Like dude, YOU know this, YOUR CHARACTER DOES NOT.

Shit he forgot his dice, can he borrow some?

“Okay MC, that’s five points of piercing damage.” “I RUN OVER AND HEAL THEM! I’LL SAVE YA MC!”

Mammon goes out of his way to save MC’s character long before it would make sense in-character to do so.

“Well, as your first man it’s my duty to save your character! You’ll probably be a blubberin’ mess if I didn’t...”

He’s not the best role player, but he’s also not the worst at it either. He tends to break character when things get too serious and he doesn’t know what to do.

Notes who? He came in here with one sheet of printer paper and it’s for doodling only.

He and Asmodeus start the tavern brawls. No question about that.

Theft is very common, he’s stealing from everyone, including but not limited to: the party, the royal guards, the dead enemies, the giant fuck-you dragon that Satan dropped in there to deter Mammon from stealing...

“I’m gonna steal that crown from the dragon.” “Roll stealth.” “Nat 20 BITCHES.” “Fuck you.”

If his character dies, may the Demon King have mercy on his greedy little soul because he’s going to mope about it for a damn long time.

Over-Powered Self Insert Again (Leviathan)

His character totally isn’t a self insert, shut up! He just looks and acts like an idealized version of himself!

He’s the one with twenty pages of character info and backstory AND the amazing commissioned art.

Levi has about 40 sets of expensive blue dice that he claims gives him the best rolls but an average session with him usually leads to roughly 10 crit fails.

While his luck with dice isn’t that good, he’s the player who will get as much out of their turn as possible, AKA break out the calculators and notes we’re doing some math.

His turn goes on for at least ten minutes because of all the shit he’s doing. When you finally think it’s over he goes “I still have my movement!”

Takes notes like a madman, every bit of lore and character info is being written down, meaning it’s a headache for everyone involved if there’s a continuity error because Levi WILL point it out.

“So you all head to the east, the great Valley of-” “Hang on, valley? In the second session you said there was a mountainous area to the east.” “Levi, shut up.”

Levi is the self appointed “guys come on let’s get back on track!” player, and whoever’s DMing is grateful to have him.

Levi is kind of the opposite of Mammon in terms of character seriousness, at first he’s taking everything super seriously and then as the campaign goes on he slowly loosens up and has some fun.

Out of curiosity one day he searches up a magical girl DND class and he’s ALL OVER IT. PLEASE LET HIM BE A MAGICAL GIRL NEXT CAMPAIGN-

Damn good at roleplaying, he’s carrying the entire in-character discussion until everyone else gets into it.

The Done With Your Bullshit DM (Satan)

So, this is the game that’s supposedly summoning him all the time despite the fact that he hadn’t been up to the human world since the 50s... what the fuck is everyone on up there?

It was the 80s, probably a lot of drugs.

When Satan DMs, you can only break the rules if it enhances the story... or if it fucks with Lucifer’s really boring character.

He will fudge dice rolls every once and a while, he also gets very attached to the characters everyone has made so he doesn’t want to perma-kill any of them unless they roll a DND quadruple natural 1 sin or something.

As attached as he gets, he isn’t above completely raging, killing everyone’s characters, and ending the session if everyone’s being annoying.

Don’t worry, your characters will be safe and sound next session once everything calms down... just don’t mention how Satan burned your character sheet right in front of you. It’s your fault if you didn’t make a second copy of your character sheet!

He’s pretty decent when it comes to improv when a player stumbles into something he didn’t plan out, but that’s not going to stop him from getting a little annoyed.

Though, if you somehow manage to get to the big bad too soon... yeah sorry, he’s got a way more dramatic fight scene planned, your player’s getting conveniently blasted out of there.

As a player, Satan is pretty decent at the game overall, but he tends to be a little aggressive if there’s an overarching mystery to be solved.

He needs to understand what’s going on! He doesn’t care if it upends the plot or it’s too early to find out! He needs to know!

His character is actually distinct and different from himself, Satan thinks it’s more interesting that way. All the books he’s read have made him a pretty awesome role player!

Satan’s notebook both as a DM and a player is filled to the brim, no detail is too insignificant to be put on the page.

Satan doesn’t fear dungeon puzzles... dungeon puzzles fear Satan.

“Are you all stupid?! This puzzle is so easy a four year old could solve it!”

I ROLL TO SEDUCE- (Asmodeus)

At first he didn’t want to play, he doesn’t play these kinds of games, sweetie. He’s too pretty.

When he’s finally convinced he puts a decent amount of effort into his character, but leaves the backstory pretty open.

Asmo would probably be the bard... right? No. He’s the warlock with the magic sugar daddy patron, and the warlock patron is spoken to as such.

“Hey baby... how’ve you been? Have I been good~?” “...”

Huh! Who woulda thought that all the bedroom roleplaying would transfer so well to DND!

Simeon is the only DM that doesn’t immediately shut this down, so Asmo will be extra inclined to play if Mr. Nice Shoulders is DMing.

When he gets really into it he buys a bunch of sparkly and very pretty dice, they bring him good luck in every roll!

Asmo has a fictional harem, no question about it. It gets to the point where Satan, Lucifer, and Simeon stop describing NPCs as attractive.

He’s rolling to seduce either way, he’s turned many an antagonist into a lover. To be fair, Asmo’s horniness has gotten everyone out of a lot of jail cells... so they can’t complain.

His notes consist of really random comments about the plot and the other players. It’s also COATED with doodles.

‘Wow, this character is such an asshole, I hope Belphie kills them.’ ‘Shit.’ ‘MC looks so cute when they play their character!!!!!!!! :D’

Poor bab forgets the rules a lot... it’s just too much to remember, okay?! How was he supposed to know that he ran out of spell slots an hour ago?!

Please help him, MC...

*Dice Cronch* (Beel)

Homeboy has been given edible dice, no question. He has also eaten the non-edible dice...

Beel goes to Satan for help with making his character, and he ends up really loving the character! :D

Problem is, he’s not that good at roleplaying... D:

“Can my character eat that person?” “Beel, no- you know what? Let me check what you’d need to roll to do that.”

I’ll save you MC part 2 electric boogaloo, but when it comes to Beel, the entire party is getting protected, no matter how little it makes sense in-character.

While Beel does take notes, a lot of them don’t end up being very important for later events. For example, he’ll jot down stuff about the layout in one room, but it turns out he didn’t take notes for the room that was actually going to be used for a boss fight.

He’s always nice to the NPCs, shame Belphie doesn’t show them the same courtesy.

Murder Hobo (Belphie)

Chaotic evil.

“Belphie, your character’s alignment is neutral good, remember?” “Fuck that, this guy’s annoying me.”

If Belphie doesn’t like an NPC, it’s up to the rest of the party to stop him from derailing the campaign and killing them.

He has space themed dice because cow-man likes space and thought they were pretty.

Notes? NOTES? You think Belphegor, the Avatar of SLOTH, takes notes? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-

He’s drooling all over the notebook... ew. Someone wake him up and tell him it’s his turn.

He puts about 35% effort forth to make a halfway decent character, and approximately 4% effort to actually roleplay.

Belphie sleeps through important plot details so he’s almost always really confused. He’ll turn to MC and ask them to explain what he missed before not learning his lesson and going back to sleep.

Wake him up for the dungeon puzzles though, he and Satan love those.

“Okay, we can’t see what’s in the room because none of the conscious party members have dark vision?” “Nope, what do you do?” “...I shove Mammon inside and shut the door.” “WHAT?!”

Bonus! The Best DM (Simeon)

Our favourite angel has homebrewed this entire campaign and boy fricken howdy are these players going to enjoy it.

Simeon fudges the dice rolls to avoid anything too irreversibly bad happening, buuuuuuut he’s still a total asshole who does the random perception rolls to keep everyone on their toes.

Everyone gets a character arc god dammit, even if they don’t have a backstory, one will be provided!

He’s got a map, he’s got miniatures, he’s got dice and backup dice for the backup dice, he’s got DM notes for days!

Simeon could be a voice actor with the amount of character voices he can do, no one ever gets confused with who’s talking.

Did someone just uncover a massive bit of plot that was meant to be found out later? Good job! No harm done! Simeon’s DM improv is second to none, and the plot will adjust accordingly!

#Obey me #Obey me! #Obey me Headcanons #obey me! headcanons #Obey me Lucifer #Obey me Mammon #Obey me Simeon #Obey me Leviathan #obey me beelzebub #Obey me Belphegor #Obey me Satan #Obey me Asmodeus #Obey me MC #obey me shall we date #obey me! shall we date?

[youbloodymadgenius]

Ivarello (Modern!Ivar x reader) Chapter 1

Moodboard by @quantumlocked310

Ivarello’s masterpost here

A/N: This is my entry for @deans-ch-ch-cherrypie 500 Followers Fairy Tale Challenge. It's a retelling of Cinderella. Congrats again, darling 💖

A huge thank you to @mrsalwayswrite, who's a great beta reader and an even greater cheerleader 😂

A massive thank you to @quantumlocked310, @vikingstrash and @serasvictoria. Thank you for agreeing to collaborate and for sharing your talent with me. Your moodboards are beyond amazing 🤩

In this story, Sigurd is alive. Ragnar and Aslaug are dead, but Lagertha didn't kill her. I took a lot of liberties with the show, I hope you won't mind.

Unlike the tale, there will be no magic involved. Not everything will be realistic, however. It's a fayritale, after all!

Let me know if you want to be tagged 😊

Summary: Orphaned five years ago, Ivar and his brothers have been living with Lagertha ever since. Now 16 years old, he wants to attend Harald's traditional Midsummer party, but obstacles stand in his way.

Warnings: description of car crash; orphaned kids; Sigurd being Sigurd; OOC characters.

Words: 1806

Additional note: I'm afraid I'll disappoint some of you. No more newspapers... The articles defined the setting of the story. From now on, it'll be a regular fic.

Hope you enjoy it nevertheless 🙂

🛡⚔️🛡

June 2021

Ivar yawns, rubbing his eyes, when he suddenly hears the front door open. The next moment, Ubbe shouts, "Hey baby bro, we're home!"

Slightly confused, Ivar looks at the time on his computer. Stunned, he blinks repeatedly, shakes his head and checks the time again, now looking at his watch. "Guess I lost track of time," he mumbles as he realizes it's really 5:30 pm. He clears his throat. "I'm coming!"

Yawning once more, he wheels to the kitchen. Hvitserk waves at him with one hand as Ubbe greets him with a grin and Sigurd... Well, Sigurd ignores him, as usual.

"Hello boys!" Lagertha smiles as she also enters the kitchen. "Did you go to the beach this afternoon?" It's a rethorical question, since sand can be seen on the tanned skin of his brothers, shirtless and wearing only swimming shorts.

When she looks down at him, her smile becomes softer. "Ivar, you seem tired. Did you work all day long?"

He nods, glad that for once she called him by his first name and not by one of those stupid nicknames that she likes but that make his skin crawl.

"Yep," he shrugs without smiling back, "I made good progress. The new version of your website is almost done. It could probably be online by the end of the week."

His stepmom flashes him a beaming smile. "Great, thanks!"

The conversation then moves on to the subject that everyone in Kattegat has been talking about for the last few days: the midsummer party thrown by their neighbor Harald Hårfager. Every June, it is Kattegat's not-to-be-missed event, to which every resident hopes to be invited.

Lagertha is invited every year, yet rarely attends; his brothers wouldn't miss it, not in a million years; Ivar never went.

He listens with half an ear as his brothers prattle on about the upcoming party, while taking a seat at the large, wooden kitchen table on which Lagertha has just put cakes and drinks.

"What are you going to wear?"

"Do you think Marit will attend this year?"

"Hopefully the music will be better than last year."

"Can't be as bad! What was the name of that reggae band?"

For a fleeting moment, Ivar entertains the thought of attending as well. Not that he's dying to, but… Sometimes, he feels a little bit like Cinderella in this house.

Don't get him wrong, it's not that bad.

First, his stepmom is not–

Wait, wait, wait, is Lagertha technically his stepmom? He's not sure. After all, she wasn't when his parents were alive, she was just his father's first wife. Anyway, she may be his guardian now, but he sees her as his stepmom and he honestly doesn’t give a shit if it's a little weird.

Where was he? Oh yes, Cinderella.

So obviously, Lagertha is not a wicked, haughty and abusive stepmom like this Lady Tremaine of the fairytale.

Actually, even if it pisses him off to admit it, she's pretty nice, patient and composed. Does he love her? Let's not exaggerate – he doesn't. She may love him though, which is a little bit uncanny, if he's being honest. He was the favorite son of her nemesis. Shouldn't she hate him? He would, if the situation was reversed.

The truth is, when he was younger, he tried, he really tried to hate her, blaming her for everything and anything. When too much pain prevented him from sleeping, he let his imagination run wild. There, bound to his bed of suffering, he could see Lagertha cutting the brakes on his mother's car, causing her crash, causing her death.

Of course, even then, he knew deep down that Lagertha had not killed his mother; that the story he told himself was just the product of his endless nights of insomnia. But what can he say? He needed this. Because blaming Lagertha rather than admitting that his beloved mother was at fault – by being distracted, or by falling asleep, he'll never know – was easier for the heartbroken boy he was.

Anyway... So yes, Lagertha is definitely not an evil stepmother like Cinderella's.

Also, he doesn't sleep on a sorry garret, on a wretched straw bed either.

Actually, he has a very large room on the main floor, with a king-size memory foam bed, a walk-in – well, a wheel-in for his case – closet and his own, huge bathroom, fully equipped for his special needs.

Sure, the bathroom and the dressing room were already there when his parents were alive; however, the memory foam mattress had been Lagertha's idea.

Anyway... So yes, he can't exactly complain about his sleeping conditions, unlike Cinderella.

And obviously, he's not forced into servitude.

Actually, one might think so, but no, he's not. Sure, sometimes he works for his stepmom, like today. But so do his brothers. When she had taken them in, she was a powerful businesswoman, working twelve to fourteen hours a day. Once she had become their guardian, she had rearranged her working time and learned to delegate; but even so, she had often run out of time. Therefore, it had seemed normal to them – yes, even to him – to help her out, each of them according to their skills and abilities.

So, while Hvitserk almost always does the grocery shopping, while Sigurd vacuums and does the laundry, while Ubbe mows the lawn and trim the bushes, he, Ivar, runs her company's website and sometimes even does the accounting. And since he loves computers and numbers, it's not exactly a problem.

Anyway... So yes, he's not a slave in this house. Unlike Cinderella.

So, yes, to sum it up, he can't really complain and he's by far not Cinderella. And he knows it.

But... Yes, there's a but...

Sometimes, he feels trapped, as poor Cinderella must have felt.

Sometimes he feels like a spectator of a life he doesn't belong to.

Sure, he doesn't have to be homeschooled – but gods, he's glad he is. The reasons for him to be continuously bullied by classmates are endless. The simplest ones being: he is a cripple, an orphan, the son of a dead mob boss, the smartest one in the whole damn school, let alone his class. Take your pick. It's no fun, no fun at all. Being home alone is preferable to that alternative.

Therefore, barely leaving the house except for medical appointments, he has no friends. He doesn't do sports either – obviously – and yeah, he lives a lonely life, filled with video games and Netflix series. And he's okay with that. Well, most of the time.

Sure, his brothers, or at least Ubbe and Hvitserk, always try to include him as much as possible. But the truth is that because of his legs, there are many, many things he just can't do.

And the other truth, the less pleasant one, is that he partially did that to himself. He cut himself off from a world that hurt him, yet he still misses this world sometimes. At times, he blames himself. Because his life, honestly, is hardly what you would call a life, is it? Not when you're sixteen.

That's why sometimes, like now, he feels this longing, almost a need, to live. To really, truly, fully live. And that's why, for a brief moment, lulled by the light chitchat of his brothers, he considers attending Harald's midsummer party.

But he knows better. This life is not for him, never has been, never will be.

And so, shaking his head, he chases the thought away and, placing his hands on his push rims, he's about to leave the kitchen while the incessant babbling of his brothers goes on.

"I can't wait."

"Don't tell me! As every year, the most beautiful girls of Kattegat will be there."

"Remember that burger food truck? Best burgers ever!"

"I've heard Y/N would be attending this year."

"There'll be booze and girls! Sounds like Valh–"

Wait. His mind goes blank.

Fuck.

What? Did he hear right?

As he replays his brother's words in his head, it's like there's an earthquake happening inside of him.

Fuck.

He stops breathing. Blinks, then clamps his eyes shut.

Fuck.

When he finally manages to draw air into his lungs, he swallows loudly before asking in a weird, high-pitched voice, his heart pounding in his chest, "What– What did you say, brother?"

Hvitserk turns his head toward him and shrugs. "I just said there'll be boo–"

"No, not you!" Ivar snaps at his brother, pointing his pointer finger at Ubbe. "You, what did you fucking say?" Out of the corner of his eye, he can see Lagertha frowning – 'no curse words in this house, boys'– and even if he barely contains an eye roll, he still mouths a quick 'sorry' at her before rewording his question, impatience coursing through him. "What did you say, dear brother? Who did you say would attend?"

Stunned, Ubbe looks at him with wide eyes. "Y/N? I said Y/N would come. That's what I heard anyway. She's Harald's niece. She was here once, right? Remember her, baby bro, huh?"

But Ivar is no longer listening, the blood draining from his face. Y/N... Y/N... Fuck. Finally. Fucking finally. After so long... He may see you again. Wow.

I'll go! I'll fucking go!

He barely contains the words, suddenly acutely aware of the deafening silence in the room, his brothers shamelessly staring at him.

With her brows furrowed and her lips turned downward in a slight frown, Lagertha takes two steps forwards before crouching down in front of him. "Are you all right, sweetie? You're a little pale."

He barely hears when Sigurd giggles, "A little pale? He's greener than an alien!"

Lagertha shoots Sigurd a dirty look and then gently cups Ivar's cheek. "Do you know her, Ivar? Do you know Y/N?"

Overwhelmed, self-conscious, freaked out, caught off-guard, he doesn't know how to respond. Should he tell the truth? Should he lie? His brothers will mock him, for sure. What is the point of telling the truth? What good would it do? On the other hand, he could really use some advice. Yeah. Sure. Advice from Sigurd. Just the thought of it is enough to make him sick. Fuck, what is he going to do?

Rushed words are out of his mouth before he can even gather his thoughts. "No. No. I don't. I mean, yes, I think I do but–" He's being pathetic and he hates it. So after a sharp intake of breath, he shakes his head and eventually replies in a flat, calm voice, the white lie rolling off his tongue. "I know her, but I thought Ubbe was talking about someone else. Sorry."

With these words, he hastily leaves the room, his eyes riveted on his knees, his heart still drumming in his chest.

Y/N. Fuck.

🛡⚔️🛡

Ivar's taglist: @waiting4inspiration @honestsycrets @lisinfleur @saldelys @gearhead66 @inforapound @readsalot73 @milkkygirls @xbellaxcarolinax @shannygoatgruff @zuxiezendler @hecohansen31 @lonewolf471 @fuckindiva @tgrrose @didiintheblog @peachyboneless @pieces-by-me @funmadnessandbadassvikings @ethereallysimple @destynelseclipsa @cocovikings23 @xceafh @mrsalwayswrite @deans-ch-ch-cherrypie @pomegranates-and-blood @jadelynlace @grimeundglow @quantumlocked310 @alexhandersen-marcoilsoe-fandom

Ivarello's taglist: @not-another-viking-fanfic-blog @hashimily @prepare4trouble @supernaturalvikingwhore @funmadnessandbadassvikings

#ivar #modern ivar #modern!ivar #modern-ivar #modern ivar x reader #modern!ivar x reader #ivar x reader #ivar the boneless #ivar ragnarsson #ivar imagine #ivar fic #ivar fanfic #ivar fanfiction #ivar vikings #vikings ivar #cherrypie’s500 #fairytale retelling #ivarello

[redjaybathood]

I hear a lot about RWBY fandom discourse re: Ironwood and apparently a big chunk of it likes to do rewrites where Ironwood is made to be a hero and RWBY villains. Which is stupid.

Things that need fixing:

1) Qrow's alcoholism. Seriously, I hated it in season 6 so much

The worst thing about this show (not to say it makes the show worse but what horrifies me about the show) is how kids, teenagers, have to pick up adults' slack, do the job of the grown ups. And I am not talking about RWBY team per se, but the culture of hunters in general

Sure, Cinder killed Pyrrha (she is, in fact, a villain) but how did Pyrrha get on the roof in the first place? Etc

And Qrow with Ruby and Yang - same thing. I know Qrow is going through some tough shit but come on. Ruby has to deal not only with evil immortal witch but also with her uncle's constant state of drunkness? When it should be him who supports and cares and worries about her?

I really wish he got a wake up call, picked himself up. Talked about his shit with another adult. Got help - again, not from a kid.

2) Ironwood paranoia. Make him for whatever reason not to fuck things up as spectacularly as he did, and he doesn't become the villain here, and here's your fix-it.

My personal favourite approach: make Qrow fake-marry Ironwood like, in season 1 or before, cue shenanigans, some soul-searching, friendship is magic, being each other double-checking system

I don't need them even to become romantically together, I need them to work together and become better versions of themselves together.

3) Oz and Salem get together again because reasons, probably magic - magic made them do it is always a good trope - and so it happens that they bring together all the reliques, gods show up, Salem and Oz takes them down together, the world goes on

Salem is satisfied because revenge in gods plus maybe restoration of her mortality (or at least her humanity; she can continue living with her husband for centuries to come if she's not, like, wanting to destroy the world); Oz is satisfied because he gets to save the world, restore Salem's humanity and get back the woman he loved.

4) Blake kills Adam before running away, or maybe Adam doesn't just. Touch a teenager. That would be a great plot point to fix in a fix-it fic.

I love Blake's story and development, and it's important, and I think the writers handled the abuse storyline good. But we're talking about fix-its. Fix-its are not only stories that remake canon when it doesn't make sense. It also remakes canon whenever you want to, because you honestly want to imagine a world where your favourite character does not suffer.

5) I want a fix it for Ruby and Yang's parents and Qrow. They are a big poly family plus a favourite uncle who's married to a military general

6) Weiss. I really need a fix-it that involves her and Winter taking control over the company and ousting their father and trying to revert the damage he's done, and those before him, and those from other companies. Which would also be a great point to address Weiss's racism.

(which they would be free to do because no Grimm because Salem and Oz won over the gods)

7) White Fang. Seriously, I need them to not become corrupted. I don't care about the IRA or other real-world inspirations, I need a fix-it where it doesn't happen. Please.

#RWBY

[omg-im-such-a-masochist]

😡🤬ANGER MANAGEMENT (PART 1)🤬😡

Prompt: Y/N has the life she’s always dreamed of: a good house, a nice car, a fat paycheck, her dream job and some loving friends. Her life feels like a fairytale...but just like every fairytale she’s not safe from the villain, the problem with that? He’s not only an incredibly hot Scotsman but also a fucking pain in the ass!

@drewmcintyrekoccsrocbwdgfan

Word count: Long-ish

Pairing: Drew McIntyre x Reader

Warnings: +18 smut, clit stimulation, angst, dirty talking, cursing, name calling,(possible part 2?Idk)

Notes: I think it’s time for me to face my biggest fear: Drew McIntyre! 😂 all jokes aside, I’ve lost count of how many one shots I have written and soon after deleted about this handsome hunk. There are so many good stories of him out there that I’ve always felt like mine were actually horse shit compared to those so I’ve never had the courage to make this Scottish wet dream an official brand of my writing, but I’m looking forward to achieve new accomplishments on my writing in 2021, so here goes nothing folks! Y’all know the drill loves,sorry for misspellings,english isn’t my first language (bla bla bla),check out my other stories if you’d like to(it would make your girl here very happy 😊) and if you’re comfortable with it,please let me know what you think? Some feedback is always welcomed and appreciated ❤️You can check out my other stories typing ‘masochist writes’ on the search bar on my page and my newest story as a fixed post.Okay,now let’s get to the fun part,shall we? Hope you’ll enjoy 😉

“Oh Thank God! Just the woman I wanted to see”

I turned around to meet Becky Lynch, one of the few dear close friends I’ve made while working for the WWE as a massage therapist.

“Hey Becks! What’s up?”

“Y/N I need your help, I was doing some training with the guys when suddenly I felt a sharp pain in my shoulder and now I feel like I wanna cry”

“Oh Becky, c’mon let’s go to my office”

Once we got there I mentioned for her to sit on the massage table.

“So tell me exactly what you were doing”

“I was doing some regular weightlifting, then all of a sudden I felt this sharp pain stretch from my elbow to my shoulder”

“Ok, did you warmed up before hand?”

“Yes”

“Did you added the weights in progressively or were you in some sort of competition against Sheamus, Cesaro and McIntyre as to whom could perform a proper weightlifting faster?” I crooked my eyebrow

“Y/N! You know I would never do that” She tried to hide her shame for being caught

“Becky, I know you! I know how competitive you are and how competitive you GET when you train with Sheamus, Cesaro and the Scottish prick.”

“They started ok?! They said I was no match for them, so I had to make them swallow word by word” She said slightly angry

“Calm down” I chuckled “And I presume you won?”

“Of course I won! As if they stood a chance” She scoffed

I touched her shoulder and palmed the back of her upper arm til I reached her elbow

“And your prize for that my darling is” I looked into her eyes “Six muscular knots, probably some small damage to your elbow nerves resulting in a little trip to the physical therapists and shit ton of pain, congratulations! Are you happy now?”

“Oh no!” She whined “Y/N, please don’t send me to the physical therapists, they will eat my ass off and they’re gonna tell Hunter about this. Please Y/N, please tell me you can fix it?” She stared at me with begging eyes

“Becks” I sighed “I can undo the muscular knots but I ain’t no fairy godmother! If you have some sort of nerve damage that’s up to the physical therapists...there’s nothing I can do about that honey”

“Please Y/N give me some of the red magical relief juice you gave to Kofi” She pleads

“Red magical relief juice?” I asked confused

“Yes, Kofi said he had this horrible pain from an injury and you gave him this red magical relief juice that helped him better than any medicine! Please give that to me too!”

I laughed before answering

“Oh Kofi, Kofi... it’s not an juice, it’s a liquid... a toner. A home made medicine I learned with my grandma. Technically I’m not even allowed to use that, but I know it works, better than these crap versions of Vick’s Vapor Rub” I tossed a little small green package in the trash can.

“Can you give that to me?” She asked with her eyes full of hope

“Fine” I said and she smiles widely

“But, you have to promise me that you will stop with these stupid and senseless competitions! They could permanently damage your nerves you know?!”

“Ok I promise”

I took a small plastic bottle from the cabinet and filled up with some small amount of the toner and placed the bottle inside a small paper bag. I also gave her a little bit of my grandma’s famous ointment in a tiny tin can.

“Alright, so here’s what you’re gonna do: once you get to your hotel room, you’ll take a hot shower and before you put your clothes on, you’re gonna rub the toner from your neck to your elbow all over your shoulder and back upper arm” She nods and I proceed “Then right after you’re going to take a small amount of this ointment” I show her the little tin can “And rub it all over your shoulder, back upper arm and elbow. Right afterwards you get dress with a long sleeve shirt and go to bed. Remember that you cannot leave your skin exposed to the cold air of air conditioning, because if you do it will make your pain and damage way worse! Do you hear me?”

“Yes Ma’am”

“If in three to four days you still feel any sort of pain you’re gonna have to go to the physical therapists”

“Ok”

“Becky I’m serious”

“Okay Y/N I got it” She smiles softly

“Good, now please, don’t tell anyone about this” I shook the little bag “And tell Kofi to keep his mouth shut. I know he means well but I could get fired for this”

“My lips are sealed” She pressed her lips in a thin line

“Thank you” I chuckled “Now, go on and take 20 drops of this” I give her some Ibuprofen “And come back in 20 minutes”

“Why?” She asks confused

“Because we still have to undo those knots and it’s not gonna be the fun kind of pain my dear”

“Argh” She groans

One week later

I was finishing tidying up the massage table from the session I just had with Bayley when someone knocked on my office door

“Come on in”

“Hey Y/N” Seth Rollins said in a voice full of pain as he tried to walk towards me

“Seth are you ok? Jesus, you look like somebody just kicked your balls so hard that they went up to your throat! What happened?” I tried to hold back my laugh

“A long story involving Cesaro and Drew. Moral of the story is my back is fucked up, do you think you can help me?”

“Can you lay down here?” I patted the table

“I guess so” He made his way to it excruciatingly slow as I helped him to lay down

“Where’s the pain worst?”

“My lower back” I touched and he gasped in pain

“Do you think you could give me some of that red magical relief juice?” He whispered so only I could hear it.

Of course I wasn’t surprised about him knowing of the “magical relief juice” since he and Becky were together I figured she told him.

“Did Becky told you?”

“Only today, once she saw I was in a tremendous pain...When she was using it I pressed her to tell me who gave it to her but she didn’t wanted to say, she said it was her fairy godmother”

I couldn’t help but smile at Becky’s inside joke and loyalty. I truly love that girl.

“Sure thing Rollins, just please don’t-“

“I won’t tell anyone Y/N don’t worry! Your witchy recipe is safe with me” He chuckled “Ouch fuck, that hurts” He groaned

“Did you bring any jacket on with you?” I laugh

“Yeah Becky told me to”

“Ok, let’s get start it”

Forty minutes and a relaxed thankful Seth Rollins later. I was finishing washing my hands while Seth pulled the zipper of his jacked up. I could feel his eyes on me

“What is it Rollins?”

“Can I ask you something?”

“If the question is if I am a 450 year old witch then my answer is, you will never know” I whisper as I turn to face him with a smirk

He laughs before saying “Well I’m sure you are sweetheart” He winks playfully “But that’s not the question though unfortunately”

“What is it then?”

He looked at me with a sense of caution before asking

“Why do you hate Drew so much?”

“McIntyre? The Scottish prick? The shitty bearded version of Gastón from Beauty and The Beast?” I ask in disbelief

My hatred for Drew McIntyre goes way back to 5 years ago. To make a long story short he has being a pain in my ass every since I started working here. It all resumes to the bad flirting and endless fights. We’ve always fought at least 3 times a week for as long as I can remember. It’s like a weekly ritual for us, and our fights are always petty and ridiculous such as who will get in the elevator first or who will rent the last SUV car.

“Yeah...” He answers slightly embarrassed

“Well that’s simple, he’s an asshole! A smug fucker who thinks he’s the most beautiful man to ever walk the earth and that every woman alive must fall for him in all fours”

“Is there anything else beyond that?” He asks

“No! Of course not!” I lied. As if I could tell him about my deep sexual desire for the Scotsman

“Are you sure? I mean, you must agree with me that he is very beautiful” Seth answers

“I’m not saying he’s not. I have eyes, so trust me, I know he’s hot as fuck and a very handsome man but that doesn’t mean that every woman on this company wants him!” I scoffed

“Does the ‘every woman’ equals Y/N?”

“Why are you asking me this?” I asked aggressively

“Look, there’s no need for you to get all defensive ok? I’m your friend and I’m just asking this as a friend. I’m not coming for you by any means” He says with a soothing voice

“Sorry, it was just my automatic response”

“It’s okay sweetie”

“But Seth...why this question now?”

“Let’s just say that I may or may not have heard some backstage talk and I would like to know this from your own mouth instead of other people’s”

“Backstage talk? About what?” I ask angrily

His eyes widened “You know what? Let’s forget I ever men-“

“No no no Rollins you’ve started this now you will finish it!” Now I was really angry

“Fuck, I should’ve kept my mouth shut” He murmured

“But you didn’t! So spit it out”

“Ok...I’ve heard one of the girls say that the reason why you hate Drew so much is because you kinda have a hidden want for him to fuck you but since he’s ‘not interested’ you get pissed off” He whispered

“I WHAT??? WHO THE FUCK SAID THAT?”

“Y/N please keep your voice down! Somebody is gonna hear you”

“I COULD GIVE TWO FUCKS IF SOMEBODY CAN HEAR ME! Who’ve said that Seth?” I was boiling with rage

“Sweetie, I’m not gonna tell you who’ve said it because I know you will-“

I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and whispered

“If you don’t tell me who’ve said that right now Rollins I swear to God on God in heaven that I will cut your balls off and shove them down your throat!”

He gulped

“Now who’ve said that?”

“Carmella” He whispered and I smiled letting go of his collar “Y/N please don’t do anything stupid!” He said as I removed my coat

“Don’t forget to rub the toner on your back once you’re out of the shower” I patted his shoulder and made my way to the door

“Y/N where are you going? Y/N please whatever you’re thinking about doing it, just don’t ok? She’s not worth it! Y/N PLEASE!”

But his screams were now faint as I make my way down the hallway to find the blond gossiper girl.

I finally find Carmella “talking”, to Sheamus in one of the hallways.

“Oi Y/N, how’s life treating ya lass?” Sheamus smiles widely at me, making his usual greeting. At any other day it would’ve made my afternoon happier to find that amazing Irish man, but not today! I was so furious that I ignored him and went directly to Carmella

“Would you mind telling me why the fuck are you not only minding my business but also spreading rumors about me and McIntyre?”

From where I stood I saw Sheamus visibly gulp

“Hey Y/N, what do ya say about we go to tha catering grab some coffee huh?” He said urgently pleading

“So? I’m waiting for an answer” I said to her fully ignoring what he just said

“Well Y/N, from woman to woman, I think we both can agree that it’s no rumor. It’s quite visible, to not say pathetic, the way you can’t deal with rejection my dear” She batted her lashes

“And what exactly are you implying?”

“The obvious Y/N! That you want Drew in between your legs but he doesn’t! I mean, let’s face it, he’s too much of a man for you anyways! It’s not like you can handle him, because we know you can’t” She measured me from head to toe making me feel very conscious about the difference between her slim toned body and my thick one full of curves.

I know that most of the men’s in this company usually date or even have one night stands with women who were body equivalent to their own - slender and beautifully toned - , but that doesn’t mean that they didn’t saw my own curvy beauty. Hell, I even got some dinner invitations from some of the guys! Cesaro, Baron Corbin, Finn Bálor and even Seth Rollins (before he got with Becky) were some of them.

“I bet that I received more dinner invitations in a week than you in a year” I scoffed

“But not from the man you want the most right darling?” She evilly grins and I see red! Pure rage in it’s rawest form took ahold of me and I jumped towards her neck but a pair of strong arms stopped me from attacking her.

“Wow, easy now lass” He said

HIM! The cause of all this gossiping with my name, I couldn’t get even more angry even if I tried.

“Let me go McIntyre!” I roar

“Uh, enjoy it while it lasts Y/N, it’s as far as you’ll ever get anyways” Carmella chuckles

I tried to wiggle out of his arms “What the fuck did you just said bitch? I’ll feed you your own teeth you fuck-“

I couldn’t finish my sentence thanks to Drew, who lifted me off from the floor and tossed me on his shoulder, taking me to back my office.

“What are you doing? Let me go! I’m gonna punch her stupid rat’s face!”

“No you won’t”

“What are you doing?”

“I’m preventing your ass from getting fired!” He answers

I tried to release myself from him, but who was I fooling? The man is a brick wall, I couldn’t let myself go not even if I tried hard!

Once we got into my office he locked the door, placing himself in front of it and released me.

“Don’t you never, EVER, dare to manhandle me like that again! Do you hear me?” I stare at him with my eyes full of rage

“You know Y/N, all that anger is not good for you...you could have a heart attack” He chuckled

I was so mad, that tears of anger rolled down my cheeks as I cut the small distance between us and begin to punch his torso, arms or whatever I could reach

“I HATE YOU! YOU’RE THE REASON WHY I AM NOW A FUCKING BACKSTAGE GOSSIP SUBJECT! IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT, YOU’RE SO FULL OF YOURSELF AREN’T YOU HUH? SHITTY ASS GASTÓN!”

I was starting to loose my strength due to my ferocious attack, and I would be damned if I let him see that...

When suddenly everything changed, the air in the room thickened and I saw myself now pressed against the door with my hands forcefully pinned on top of my head.

“Aww, that was sweet princess” He smirks confidently

“What are you doing Drew? Let me go” I murmured

“Oh it’s Drew now huh? Why the sudden change love? What happened with ‘Scottish prick, asshole and Gastón’?” He cackled “What’s wrong princess? Not feeling so confident and in charge anymore are we?” He pouts

“You’re hurting me” I lied

“Nu uh, we both know that, that’s a lie. I know you Y/N, every inch of you so don’t you lie to me now! That’s not what pretty little girls like you do” He reprimanded me

I felt confused and slightly turned on by his whole dominant character. But still I felt the urge to fight back.

“And what do you know about me McIntyre? NOTHING! So don’t YOU dare to pretend that you do! You know nothing about who I am or my needs, so quit the act”

He laughed before saying “And that’s where you’re wrong princess” He towered over me, securing my wrists with one of his hands while the other grabbed my cheeks making my lips pout(like one would with a child) and tilted my head up to meet his blue gaze.

“You see Y/N, we’ve known each other for what? 5 years? I’ve done a lot of observing in those years... I became quite good at reading you” He leaned forward..his beard,lips and mustache brushing against my own lips

“So I know for a fact that what triggered you into fighting Carmella wasn’t what she said...But the fact that what she said is true” He searched my eyes for confirmation and when he found it he smirks in appreciation

A murmured ‘Fuck you’ came out of my lips the best way I could since he had this vicious grip on my cheeks.

“Oh Y/N, Y/N... what am I going to do with you princess?” He asks amused as he release my cheeks “I must say though... I agree with almost everything Carmella said” He vaguely added

Pure humiliation filled me, the thought of him knowing that deep down I had a thing for him which wasn’t reciprocal at all made my stomach turn. I felt the tears of humiliation start to rise to my eyes, but I wouldn’t give him the pleasure to see that he had broken me. Instead I reached for the safety of the one thing I knew I could do: fight!

“You let me go right now you fucker or I swear you will regret it!” I said as threatening as I could

“Oh my, won’t you look at that? Kitty has claws huh?” He chuckled lightly

I took advantage of his distraction and yanked my arms as fast as I could out of his grip. The action caught him by surprise, giving me the upper hand to turn around to unlock the door so I could leave. But his surprise didn’t last long as for he saw what I was about to do and pressed me against the door once more, instead now my back was the one facing him so he pressed his semi hard bulge up against my ass with my hands and face now pressed on the wooden door.

“Where do you think you are going princess? We’re not done talking just yet” He whispers in my ear, making my whole body shiver.

“As I was saying before you rudely interrupted me” His lips were glued to my ear “I almost, I said almost, agree with everything that she said..except for one thing”

“If you’re gonna say that-“

“Maybe I’ll have to buy you a ball gag, since you don’t seem to ever know when to shut up...or maybe I should choke you instead,what do you say?”

I gulped loudly

“Or even better, I should fuck your mouth..bury my cock so deep on your throat that you will have no other option but drool all over yourself” He pressed his bulge harder against my ass “, that will make you shut up! I can already imagine how gorgeous you will look with my cock shoved down your throat” He moaned “Would you like that princess? Would you like for me to show you where’s your place? Where you really belong?” He grinds his erection on my ass and the feeling makes me moan softly

“Drew...” I pleaded

“The only thing I don’t agree with Carmella” He continues his previous statement ignoring my plea “Is that I’m too much of a man for you. To be honest I think you’re the only woman in this company who can actually handle me! The only one who will love and beg to be fucked faster and rougher..” His hands let go of my wrists and roam down to cup my breasts roughly, pulling me even closer to his body

“The only one who is the perfect fit for me...who will let me use every single hole as I please” He bites my ear making me gasp for more air.

“Won’t you Y/N? Do you want me to use you like the good little whore that you are?”

My head was buzzing with excitement, I could feel the now very wet pool of desire in between my legs. To think that all of my darkest fantasies with this man were about to come true made me moan a faint ‘Yes’ to him

He grunts at my positive response while one of his big hands unbuttoned and unzipped my jeans so his hand could sink down the fabric to find my very wet core.

“Hmmm I’ve been waiting 5 years for this lass...Fuck, you already feel amazing on my hand I can’t wait to feel this pretty little pussy around my cock” He growls

“Fuck Drew, please” I whisper

“It’s Sir to you, my good little pet” He smirked “Now tell me, do you think I should fuck you right here, right now so that everyone in this company can hear me make you my fuck toy or should we head back to the hotel? What do you say pet?” He asks as his fingers firmly circles my clit making my legs shake

“W- Whatever pleases you Sir” I stuttered

“I see you’re a quick learner huh?” He chuckles amused “I say, let’s show this roster who is the only woman who can properly handle me” He says as he removed his fingers from my core and licked them clean while staring at me. I softly moan to that scene and he smiles deviously before whispering

“Strip now pet and show what a beautiful fuck toy you are for Sir”

To be continued...

Please let me know if you would like to see a part 2 🥺?

#drew mcintyre #drew galloway #drew mcintyre one shot #drew mcintyre x reader #drew mcintyre x oc #drew mcintyre fanfic #drew mcintyre smut #wwe smut #wwe imagine #wwe one shot #wwe fanfiction #masochist writes

[princess-of-the-corner]

Okay some people asked for what characters in The Crossover would do with TikTok accounts so here we go:

Team Miraculous:

The Heroes have a collective Tiktok they all have access too. It's mostly showing off some parkour tricks, and occasional safety tips. Plus once in a while Honeybee or Chat posts a "we made the team watch fma:b and this is their reaction"(which always has them stealthily holding the camera because if anyone sees the camera they know some shits coming.)

Mari's is mostly fashion and baking. Like in-progress videos and "hey here's how to do this trick".

Adrien's official account is mostly just "look at my partners they're so amazing!!!" But he has a dummy account to watch and like other videos.

Alya's is mostly Ladyblog stuff with the occasional "check out my friends!!" Promotion.

Nino and the members of Kitty Section both use it to show off clips of video/music(sometimes as collabs but also their own stuff) with links to full versions.

Chloé's is.... Oddly positive but in that "look we can't always be all 'it's okay to be sad uwu'! Sometimes you have to be a bitch just be a bitch about the right things!"

Zoé has conspiracy theories of course. Oddly enough she ropes Alix and also Jalil into it and while it does stay in conspiracy territory it is historically informitive.

Mylene is very shy so while she'll appear in other videos, she mostly only makes videos herself as informative videos about current issues and the like.

-

Untitled Alien Team:

Ben's are mostly shitposts but it's onlu because he gives no context. In reality he's complaining about the other forms and their issues or general shapeshifter issues like "damn it I wish I had a tail 24/7". Sometimes gets into dark humor that makes the followers go ??????? Are you okay????

Gwen isn't big on Tiktok but will appear in everyone else's.

Kevin didn't have one at first but then Ben filmed him ranting about stupid car stuff of "damn it while I love having a job I wish some people would do basic fucking maintenance because how dare you treat a car like that?!?!?!?!" And now he has a channel of half "goddamn it don't fuck up your brakes!!" And half legit info on basic car maintenance.

Lilo still does Hula so a lot of her videos involve that, plus occasional shenanigans, plus cute videos of the various Experiments.

Team Phantom:

Danny's account is half shitposts, half "space is awsome!!!". Meanwhile 'Phantom' has an account that is even more shitposts, and also him being so very tired. Danny makes morbid humor jokes on both accounts.

Sam's are mostly informative about current issues. She and Mylene actually kinda know each other through these.

Jazz also makes more informative videos, and it's mostly mental health based.

Tucker's ia mostly a behind the scenes compilation of everyone else's.

Elle gets one to record her reactions to new experiences. Whether it be new foods or movies she's never seen. Her commenters are occasionally concerned how she doesn't know certain things. They think her saying "yeah I'm a clone and only technically like a year old" is a joke.

Valerie has a parkour one obvs.

There's an official Fentonworks one that all the kids show up on which has info on Ghosts, safety tips, and shows off some of the gadgets they make.

The Rainbooms:

Sunset made one to give tips to everyone who suddenly got Magic and answer questions about Equestria. But it got out of the circles it should be and people think it's an RP account.

Sci-Twi shows off so many gadgets.

Pinkie and AJ share a baking channel. AJ focuses more on home-y recipies and such while Pinkie is half "it's that fucking chocolate guy again!!" And half that one where the girl remakes the Webkinz recipie.

Rainbow is partly flight tricks but also has clips to promote the band.

Fluttershy braves the attention to show off proper animal care.

Misc one offs:

Zak goes full "Crocodile Hunter" and makes short documentaries on Cryptids. Someone comments "hey this is like that show 'Weird World' but better!" And a bunch of people reply and Zak just makes a video replying like "Ha! Take that you pale ass bitch!"

Kim Possible has one to show off gymnast/cheerleading moves(with a bonus of Ron cheering her cheering lmao)

Dippee and Mabel absolutely just document all the fuckery in Gravity Falls. With bonus versions where it's like "hold my drink and watch this!!!". Double bonus of taunting Bill when he comes back.

Jack Spicer also has an account to show off gadgets. He and Sci-Twi are in a friendly rivalry.

#the crossover