#this is only part one because I have plenty more photos where that came from 💀

[kloofspeaks]

Peter Quill / Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 3 Screencaps

Part Two

#Peter quill #MCU #marvel #gotg v3 #gotg #gotg spoilers #gotg vol 1 #gotg vol 3 spoilers #this is only part one because I have plenty more photos where that came from 💀 #chris pratt #movie screencaps

[feverdreamjohnny]

The Epitaph of Anything Goes

I decided that this morning I would talk about The Museum of Anything Goes and the subject of lost media.

For the uninitiated, The Museum of Anything Goes is an obscure "game" released in 1995 by Wayzata Technologies, a company that is so far under the radar that I was unable to find any useful information about it outside of TMoAG.

All I could uncover is that they published a few multimedia projects (which are essentially lost now) alongside some asset discs (clipart, SFX, etc.). That's it.

The brains behind Wayzata are even more difficult to locate these days: there are only two main names credited inside of TMoAG - Michael Markowski and Maxwell S. Robertson.

The game alleges that Michael and Maxwell are well known in the art world, but any additional information about the duo is scarce beyond the confines of the museum. Attempting to search for either name online turns up plenty of rabbit holes - but none of them have anything to do with the Michael and Maxwell responsible for TMoAG.

This is particularly fascinating because it essentially means that TMoAG is the only accessible record of their lives. Before we dig any deeper into that statement, let me step back and actually address what this game is.

The Museum of Anything Goes is, by definition, a virtual art museum. Functionally it's a prerendered point-and-click adventure game where you can explore a bunch of multimedia exhibits that give the surface-level impression of a children's edutainment game, but once you start exploring further it reveals a side that firmly plants the game's feet into a haze of substance abuse and surreal humor.

Many exhibits are essentially just toying around with the astonishing new powers of CD-ROM. Everything has to make noise. Everything has to spin and flitter around. There's an air of genuine excitement for the medium, and I can't help but find it extremely charming.

The game also functions as a scrapbook, filled to the brim with photos of random trips to the zoo and snow-mobile rides with friends. At one point we even get insight into something as specific as Michael's one-year job as a tutor at a Chicago middle school, where he talks about how it opened his eyes to how poorly funded and mismanaged the school system is.

It's simultaneously quaint and chilling to see so much personal history packed into a world doomed to obscurity. As I explore the deeper parts of the museum, I contemplate if the creators are still alive today. It's a bit morbid, but imagine that - you create a single obscure game with your friend and it's all the world can see. TMoAG is currently the only surviving piece that gives any insight into who these two men were.

While many exhibits are lighthearted or nonsensical, there are occasional moments where the game dips into the eerie.

One exhibit has the player kill a man by dropping him from the sky, and after burying him you open the coffin to a video of a rotting pig carcass being put into an incinerator.

Other exhibits just feature simple 3D renders shifting around a dark screen while haunting groans play in the background.

While I would never refer to the game as "scary," its darker moments combined with the occasional mature subject matter definitely begs the question: Who is this game for?

You have to remember that this game came out long before the concept of "alt-games" had become codified in the digital space. Sure, unconventional digital art had been around before the advent of 256 colors, but TMoAG was being sold on disk as a game! It came out 2 years after DOOM hit shelves!

The trend of using the PC for entertainment was certainly on the upswing around that time, but It's not like TMoAG had a massive audience to find a niche in. With its mature themes it certainly wasn't suited for the kids market either, so who was it for?

At the end of the day, it's a moot question. We already know the target audience for The Museum of Anything Goes: Nobody. It doesn't have an audience because by its nature, TMoAG wasn't being made FOR someone, it was being made BY someone. It's a raw, unfiltered form of personal expression.

I think games like these are pivotal, because they question why people assume a game has to exist for the sake of being a consumable product. TMoAG certainly has the shape of a product: it features an intro cutscene, it has a tutorial, it features intuitive UX, it even has a map! These are all features that are solely integrated to provide comfort to an end-user. But once you actually wander around the museum for a bit, you realize how bizarrely its packaging fits its contents.

I think TMoAG is criminally underrated. It's not because its core content contains some earth-shaking truth, it's because the game defied all odds and cheated death.

How many thousands of other personal projects were deemed a little "too exotic" to be archived? How much history was lost these past 40 years as the digital space evolved and ate its old skin?

God knows how many other TMoAGs we'll never learn about because they weren't lucky enough to be preserved.

The Museum of Anything Goes isn't just some nonsensical art piece, it's a grave marker for so much lost media. Its existence is a reminder that some people's lives were fossilized, then macerated into nothing because a construction company built a skyscraper over them. The only evidence we have of those other games existing is this little fossil that somehow slipped out from under the skyscraper unscathed.

Even though so much has been lost, TMoAG survives as an epitaph.

#the museum of anything goes #TMoAG #writing

[meowmeowriley]

Well. I am now going crazy over Soap showing the team a picture of him holding a brace of fat, fluffy rabbits on his family's farm. The cuts are so clean there's hardly any blood staining their fur, and he's holding them so proudly, big wide smile on his face. And Ghost has some Feeeeeeeeelings about it does he want to hide from that sharp grin? does he want to be one of those rabbits, limp in Johnny's hand? would Johnny enjoy him as much as them?)

excuse me while i scream

😑 I hate you. I hate you, because I love this. (I don't actually hate you, anon, I could never ❤) I hadn't planned on going anywhere with this buuuuutttt.....

The subject of family came up, as it often does, but being on base and between missions, the men of the 141 could share photos.

Price showed the team pictures of himself as a boy, fishing with his dad. Some of him as an adult, more fishing. They'd all dismissed the boonie hat as being part of his wardrobe simply because he'd been issued it, but he hadn't. His grandfather had been issued the hat, and he'd worn it. And Price's father had worn it. And now him. The Price name had a legacy, stored in that hat.

Gaz shared photos of himself as a teen, his sisters, himself with his girlfriend. She was a shifter, though he didn't specify her species at first. She had gorgeous silky black hair, beautiful bronze skin. He said they'd met in Brazil, where she was from, and he was crazy about her. As he flipped through his camera roll on his phone, selfie after selfie of the two, each was more adorable than the last. She clung to Gaz, hung off him in nearly every picture. In some, her eyes were more black, than others. Sometimes she had black claws instead of fingernails.

"Why won't ye tell us, Gaz?"

"I don't want to have to hate you, mate."

"Tell us, and I'll tell you what I am." Ghost piped up from behind everyone.

Price's eyes went wide. He had no clue, though the other two thought he did. It had been erased from his file before they'd ever met, and he'd been denied any time he'd asked. Soap had nearly begged him, on multiple occasions. Gaz took the bait. "She's a spider shifter."

"What the fuuuuck?" Soap whispered. It earned him a smack from Gaz.

"Fuck off, Soap. Go on then, Ghost."

He smiled beneath his mask. "Well I never said when I'd tell you." He was smug, sue him. It earned him a laugh from Price, a groan from his sergeants. Soap took his turn next.

He had a photo album. Clearly well loved. Spoke of his family fondly. "Ah'm one of six, so there's plenty of picture." He was proud of his large family. Showed off pictures of tired yet happy parents, fields and a little farm house. Picture of his siblings. And then he saw it. A picture of a young man, unmistakably Johnny, even though his eyes were too narrow to see the brilliant blue, his enormous toothy smile gave him away. the young teen held a brace of rabbits, both tied by their rear legs together. Bloody noses the only real sign of their demise, other than the fact that they were held upside down by a kid.

It wasn't really a surprise, Soap had been vocal since the task force had been formed about his love for rabbits, that he'd grown up with meat rabbits, that he loved the taste. His mother had even sent him a care package on multiple occasions with rabbit stew, which he immediately tore into. He'd offer to share with the rest of the team. Nobody noticed that all but Ghost accepted.

Soap's voice was muffled. Ghost barely made out something about it being his first time, and he was proud. One of the rabbits had a light grey pelt. Light grey interspersed with white and black, similar to that of some wild rabbits. It could easily be a smaller version of himself. It could be him. The feeling churning within himself, he couldn't place. He wanted to thump, to warn the others, there's danger here... But... That could be him. And would it really be so bad? If it were Johnny to string him up as such?

The page turned.

Ghost started.

He hadn't realized the others were still talking. He couldn't hear them. How long had it been? It was then he realized he'd gone tharn. Instinct had taken over, and like many of his kin he'd frozen in the face of danger. That had never happened to him before. But then again, the danger had never been so tempting.

As the second youngest of twelve, Simon had known from a young age he was different than his siblings. He was off. He had a screw loose. It was always blamed on his father, he and Tommy having a different one to the rest. But Tommy turned out okay. Simon joined the army. In the army his twisted nature suited their needs just fine.

Soap finished up.

All turned to Ghost.

His hands clenched around the book he had stored in the long pocket of his jumper. It was special. A copy of Watership Down, his favorite book as a child and the thing his mother blamed for his desire to serve, but this one was different. When he'd signed up, his eldest sister had gone to the bookshop and bought this one, then had it rebound with photo slots at the end of it. His favorite story, and his favorite people. It contained photos of his family. His mother, eleven siblings, and numerous niblings. Himself. With so many, it was nearly impossible to take a photo where no one was shifted. And it was actually impossible to get one without at least partial shifts.

He swallowed down the instinct to run, and removed his hands from his pocket.

#ghostsoap #soapghost #ghoap #cod mw2 #call of duty #modern warfare #fanfic #text post #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #kyle gaz garrick #monsterfucker!gaz #rabbit shifter ghost #shifter au #captain john price

[starker-raving-mads]

For You: Part VIII

Rating: M for sexual situations

Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V | Part VI | Part VII | Part VIII | Part IX

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After incorporating Tony into the penthouse and the rest of the tower, Peter found himself in a very familiar yet strange routine. He was spending all his time at the tower, now, having officially moved in. Being 18 and a billionaire - which still boggled his mind - made the transition easier. Reporters had finally found out where May lived and it wasn't until they had released a press statement via Friday that he had moved to the tower that they started leaving her alone.

The whole thing was surreal.

But he spent his days with Tony, May came over for dinner a few nights a week and updated him on FEAST and the rest of her goings on, he had lunches out with friends in hole-in-the-wall places (the only ones the press couldn't spot him at, they realized, after photos of Peter at a Panera ended up online), he went on patrol, and his classes started.

So while it was strange, it was also exactly the same as before. May, his friends, classes, and time spent with Tony. It was just a little different now, and Peter wasn't mad at the change in pace. Especially all the extra time with Tony. Because if it was just them in the tower, Tony was always out and chatting with Peter, going over ideas, talking about plans, just…hanging out. It was kind of amazing. And while Peter missed the physical things - like Tony moving him with wide, warm hands on his hips, leaning over his shoulder to look at his projects, putting a firm hand on his arm telling him he was proud - having the older man back like this was more precious to him than he could possibly say.

It was just like that, though, that the familiarity turned to something a little…more.

It was the end of the night after a long day of tinkering with Tony in the lab, handling SI business through Friday, chatting with May, and wrapping up his first week of college courses online. Peter was more than a little exhausted to say the least. It was a good day, really; he and Tony had found a nice little mystery of a bug in one of the projects that the older man had left over as a working component for a new mobile phone, a competitor (and upgrade) to the iPhone.

They'd pondered over it all day, then through out each meal, and even between Peter's classes. Eventually they'd let it drop because Friday had reminded Peter that it was 2AM and he had to be at a FEAST event for May at 10AM the next morning. If he was going to get rest, it had to be now.

But as he wound down in his (Tony's) room, his mind wouldn't shut off despite his physical exhaustion. It had been a busy day and he hadn't given himself any time to just stop thinking for a minute and let all the details percolate.

Sighing to himself, stretched out on the bed, he closed his eyes, arms crooked one on his chest and the other on his stomach. He let his mind wander, float in the liminal space where thoughts came and went without trying to focus them on one topic or another. Yet, inevitably, they always came back to Tony.

Tony's smirk when he was feeling playful, his eyes when they were happy, the way his hands moved in the air free and careless. Peter groaned thinking about those hands. They were so strong and capable, nimble and dexterous - god, the amount of dreams he'd had about those hands -

Suddenly, Peter was aware of the firmness in his pajama pants, his cock half hard from the images in his head. He thought about ignoring it - how weird it would be, when Tony was ostensibly right downstairs in the lab, doing whatever he did when Peter wasn't there - but decided that if this is what his body needed to fall asleep, he'd give into it.

After all, it had been five years since the last time he jerked off thinking about his mentor. He had plenty of time to make up for.

So he slipped the hand from his stomach, down under the waistband of his shorts and gripped his cock in his hand, fondling himself as he thought more about Tony. His face after Peter made him laugh, the crow's feet around his eyes, the sincerity in his voice when he was talking about how much Peter meant to him. The predatory way he glared when arguing, how dark his eyes got, how fierce his voice became -

Peter was fully hard then, cock leaking precum in his palm. He pushed his pants down freeing his cock fully, the softness of the comforter against his hard flesh making him moan. He arched his back making the fabric drag against the head and he gripped himself hard, then, hand starting to move in the up-down motion, fingers pressing against the vein on the underside, palm twisting when he reached the head.

He spread his legs, bringing his heels to his ass and ground down into the bed, his favorite fantasy playing out behind his eyes. Tony, between his legs, hard cock riding the ridge of his ass, saying filthy things to him, teasing him, mocking him. You want my cock so badly don't you, baby? Need it in your slutty little hole? And Peter begged in his mind, yes, yes, yes.

He spread his legs further, grateful for his flexibility, imagining Tony's large, capable hands dragging them apart, callouses tickling the soft skin of his thighs. He flexed his hips, thrusting into his hand, pretending he could feel a stiff cock just glancing his sensitive hole. Come on, Tony would tease, work for it, baby, show daddy how desperate you are for his cock. You can do better than that can't you?

Peter whined, back arching, and he was so close - so, so close already, just these few moments thinking about Tony, thinking about -

"Hng," he groaned, low and needy. "Fuck, fuck, need it, daddy - "

"Peter! I - "

The teen's eyes flew open shock and adrenaline pushing him right over the precipice he'd been teetering on, his orgasm painful and powerful as he locked eyes with ones the glowed, blue and wide. Hot ropes of cum hit his chest, the blanket having been pulled off while he was moving so frantically, one calf still draped in gray-blue fabric but not enough to hide the evidence of his exploits.

He'd never come down from an orgasm so fast.

"Mr. Stark! Uh, Tony - I, fuck," he said, scrambling to sit up, dragging the cover over himself. His hands were fumbling, adrenaline and nerves getting to him as he pulled the entire blanket into a big pile over himself, like a mound of sand burying his body at the beach. Like layers could hide his sin.

Tony said nothing, standing there, staring at him, frozen. His mouth was slack, hands still, mid-gesture. His eyes tracked Peter's erratic movements until after several long moments Peter stilled and, slowly, very slowly, Tony went to a tense position. Mouth closed, hands fiddly at his sides, eyes darting from Peter's head, down to the blanket covering his body, and back again.

Peter decided to pretend like nothing happened.

"Um," he cleared his throat. "Did you - did you need something?" His voice nearly cracked at the end, the pitch sharper than it had been in years from nerves. He could feel the blush furious under his skin, warming his cheeks and the back of his neck and the tips of his ears. They locked eyes for a second and it seemed to bring Tony back online, eyes going impossibly wide before he blinked out of existence.

"Fuck."

#starker #ironspider #peter parker x tony stark #tony stark x peter parker #peter parker #tony stark #peter x tony #iron man #spiderman #for you fic

[foxymoxynoona]

Hi Foxy! The drabble game is such a fun idea! Do you think you could write idol!jk with a fan? It could be him feeling attracted to her, or them hooking up, or maybe their first meeting... I really don't have any particular request, the stage is yours! I'm really curious about how you'd approach it because you have a talent for writing the cutest but also oddly realistic scenarios. I love you and happy anniversary!

I thought this would be a nice little fluffy tease for Valentine's Day to express my love back to you, I hope you enjoy it!

Characters: Idol Jungkook x Fan Y/N Words: 3k CW: none

You’re not surprised your friends bailed on you when the choice came up between Angel Tribute and Mavis McAdams, but you’re still disappointed. They knew the band –a deceptively named trio of three artists Mavis, Makena, and Adam– topped your list of favorite bands ever. But they were smaller than Angel Tribute, so when push came to shove, you were left on your own to see your favorite group. And you hated being alone. 

Especially right now, when you are positive that Jeon Jungkook of BTS is standing right in front of you.

You didn’t think anything of him at first. He was just another body in the space around you where you’ve found a little area for yourself, not up in the pit but a little further back where there’s breathing room. It wasn’t so crowded back here, and you liked the flexibility of being able to stand or sit; there was only one row of seats in front of you before a small aisle, which kept you from feeling too trapped. But you were still close to the front, close enough to feel a part of the music, and you’d been happily swaying and singing along under your breath to the first song when he slid into the space directly in front of you, joining the man who had already been there.

The man you were now convinced was a bodyguard. Or maybe a manager? An assistant? You didn’t actually know how those things worked. Before you recognized him, neither man meant anything to you except that now you were annoyed that your view was blocked. 

Just as you considered leaning forward and asking them to leave a little space for you to see through, the newly arrived man had looked to the side and– ok, you didn’t know which thing it was that had made you suspicious, but the combination of a few things had. The face mask and snapback hadn’t, there were plenty of people around these days in such attire, but the profile even with the mask had made you pause. The earrings in the ear –well, you were at a music festival, but regular guys didn’t usually have so many hoops. You wouldn’t even admit it on your deathbed but the freckle on the side of his neck made you start to suspect– and then the eyes. The eyes in the shadow between hat and mask had to be him, you were 98% sure of it. 

Instantly you abandoned your idea of suggesting they move. They didn’t need to move. For just this moment, you were perfectly ok with Jeon Jungkook of BTS blocking your view as you mulled over your options. You could obviously ask for an autograph, but the thought of doing so flooded you with embarrassment. You certainly wouldn’t ask for a picture, even worse, but taking a sneaky photo to keep as a memento just seemed so creepy and invasive. 

The other option, and the one that seemed best to you, was to pretend you did not know who he was and enjoy this moment of your life in which you were going to enjoy a Mavis McAdams concert staring at the back of Jungkook’s neck. He had a really nice neck. He must have had a haircut recently, the hairline was really neat. You missed the long hair but it seemed to grow quickly for him and he’d gone that route multiple times so probably it would be long again soon. It was good you weren’t seeing it long. That would be too much for you to stay chill about.

A new song started, an old favorite of yours, and you sang quietly along –much more quietly than you had a moment ago since the voice of a generation was standing in front of you. But it must have been loud enough to embarrassingly draw attention, or maybe it was the dance moves you couldn’t quite help because you just really loved this song. Your eyes were closed, you didn’t think you’d accidentally hit him, but when you opened your eyes you realized he was looking over his shoulder.

At you.

You bit back the squeak of surprise and tried to just casually lean around him to see the band, as if you didn’t notice him at all.

“You can’t see.” 

Of course you didn’t assume he was talking to you, but when he said it again with a sort of flapping hand gesture in your direction, you realized he really was addressing you.

“Uh… well… no…”

He laughed and nudged the bodyguard, saying something rapidly in Korean that you couldn’t hope to follow with your handful of phrases. The bodyguard nodded and shifted over, leaving a clear space for you to see through.

“Oh, thank you.” You gave an awkward bow before regretting it; it felt like you’d just admitted you knew who he was and were familiar with Korean culture just because of liking K-pop and k-dramas. Which was the truth but god, embarrassing.

Jungkook and the bodyguard nodded and the next song starting grabbed their attention away from you.

It was definitely more enjoyable to actually be able to see the performance and you marveled at his thoughtfulness for even noticing. Even when more people packed into the seats, the bodyguard kept the space in between them clear for you. It was a little annoying though because while you were happy standing and dancing, the people around you were dancing a little more wildly and kept bumping into you, disrupting your enjoyment. You tried to ignore it but a particular hard jab in your back made your voice hitch as you were singing.

Jungkook glanced back at you, chin tilted up to see you under the brim of his hat. He beckoned with his hand like it was a rush and pointed down at the seat in between him and Bodyguard.

What the fuck.

In no world would you refuse to take him up on that though. With a mixture of relief and abject terror, you stepped over the back of the seat, flattered when the bodyguard held a hand up to steady you as if you were one of his charges. He asked Jungkook something that was dismissed with a shake of the head. Maybe an offer to switch seats? Jungkook didn’t think it was necessary? You didn’t care if you projected that all over them. 

It was like fireworks going off in your head as you tried to play it cool and focus your enthusiasm on the music. There was more space to move here without bumping or getting bumped. Jungkook was vibing too, swaying and grinning, sometimes singing along. You tried not to look at him and be awkward but occasionally you’d feel his grin and glance at him. The eye contact made you both laugh. The singing together, the dancing, you were at this concert with him. The craziness of it didn’t quite fade away but it shifted into something more joyful and less shy. He wasn’t an idol right now, he was just another fan, and meeting someone else who knew all the lyrics to the B-sides was really exciting as a music lover.

“You like this song? You know it!” he beamed, like he was impressed by your knowledge, like he was thinking all the same things right now.

“I can’t sing well, sorry, don’t listen to me!”

“No, it’s good. You are good. It’s very cool.”

You didn’t think your singing was good nor cool, especially not to someone who sang like Jungkook, but it was kind of him to say so. It made you feel less self conscious about relaxing and enjoying yourself. Why not? Ok, your singing was fine, and it was all in good fun because you were just enjoying the music, just like he was. It wasn’t worth being nervous over.

The songs played out and before you knew it, they were announcing their last song. You couldn’t help the groan of disappointment.

“Are they your favorite band?” Jungkook asked you. “I like them so much.”

“They’re definitely one of them. I’ve seen them twice before but never at a festival like this. The first time was in this really small venue, it felt so intimate.” You broke off, realizing you were rambling, but how could you not?

“I love them too. I saw them one time. They opened for…” You couldn’t hear who he said over the surge of music and the crowd but nodded anyway. A fan. He was a fan and it was really cool to know that about him, for him to share that love with him.

Halfway through the song, he leaned around you to say something to the bodyguard, then pulled his mask up. You could tell instantly by his body language he was leaving, probably before the band finished and the crowd around you looked somewhere other than the stage. He might get swarmed. You understood but hated for everything to be wrapping up already.

You certainly didn’t expect him to nudge your arm and lean down to say, “Come on, let’s go.”

“Huh, what?”

He lifted his chin again to look at you and his eyes were sparkling and ok look, you weren’t going to tell him no. So you pulled your bag onto your shoulder and shoved your water bottle inside, checked your pocket for your phone, and followed Jungkook and his bodyguard.

Obviously you had no idea where you were going so you stuck close, fully expecting the bodyguard to shove you away at any second. Or someone else to materialize and do it, a manager or something. But no one did, and that’s how you wound up following Jeon Jungkook to the backstage area. The guards at the security checkpoint waved him through and you as well when Jungkook said,

“She’s with me, bro.”

God I wish.

He paused to look around and spoke with the bodyguard for a moment before leading the way to a tent behind the stage McMavis had just performed on. You could hear the crowd cheering for the encore as you followed but as much as you regretted missing it, you wouldn’t have missed this for the world. You looked around in surprise, recognizing a few other VIPs, but you didn’t want to get left behind and unceremoniously kicked out.

The bodyguard grabbed two waters from a cooler and handed them to you each and your Korean gamsahamnida made them both grin.

“You speak Korean?”

“No no, that’s all I know,” you quickly said.

“I will say ‘she is my translator.’”

“Your English is really good. You don’t need one, huh?”

He tugged his mask down so you could see his grin as he laughed, “Ok, thank you. It’s not very good but thank you.”

“I think it is.”

The bodyguard got his attention and you both looked over to see McMavis moving towards a tent further aware, bouncing around and amped from their show.

“Ah, ok. It is embarrassing if they say no,” he told you before setting off after them. Say no to what?

There wasn’t long to wait to find out. They’d just collapsed on the couches in their tent as a stage manager told them they had twenty minutes to decompress until their fan-meeting event; you could see and hear them through the gauzy curtains as Jungkook’s bodyguard said something to the woman by the entrance.

“Yes!” Mavis shouted. “I heard that! BTS? Someone from BTS is here?”

Jungkook gave you a nervous smile like he was nervous about meeting them. You just followed dumbly along as he ducked into the tent, nodding and bowing as Mavis, Makena, and Adam all jumped to their feet to greet him.

“She is my translator,” he said without forgetting you. “Also a fan. Me too. Your show is so great.”

“Yes it was really wonderful. You’re amazing live,” you gushed. Secretly praying no one was about to ask you to translate anything. Oh god. Would Jungkook play along if you had to speak fake Korean to him? Would you just give it up and confess? You thought he wasn’t capable of lying so why was he lying right now?! What the hell??

No one cared, clearly. They were too busy gushing over Jungkook, the artists all trading praise, talking about other acts at the festival. You felt simultaneously like a third wheel and perfectly at ease, because despite your expectations, no one was actually shooting out god-rays right now. If you didn’t know how talented and famous these people were, they were just people raving about music they liked, enjoying a beautiful day at a music festival. How could this seem so normal and so surreal at the same time?

Probably because he’d marked you as a translator you were mostly ignored, which was fine by you, but occasionally Jungkook would gesture to you as if prompting you to say something and include yourself. You mentioned the other shows you’d been to. You answered what your favorite song was and flustered when Jungkook nodded, “Me too. It’s mine too.” 

All too soon, their manager was telling them they needed to get to their fan meeting. You leapt out of the way as the band members and Jungkook assembled for a photo without any prompting, like it was just something they were familiar with. You almost offered to take it but an assistant and Jungkook’s bodyguard had it covered.

Jungkook reached forward, grabbed your wrist, and pulled you into the frame after they’d already taken a couple. You had half a second to wonder oh no am I going to get doxxed on the internet if these photos make it online before deciding you didn’t give a shit. That wasn’t real right now. What was real was that Jungkook had been thoughtful enough to include you.

Belatedly you realized you hadn’t taken one with your own phone but the band was already saying goodbye, their manager ushering them away. They hadn’t even really taken their break and there were other people lingering outside the tent trying to get their attention but it was obvious to you they had spent their time exactly how they wanted to. ARMY were everywhere, after all.

You, Jungkook, and the bodyguard moved out of the tent and you realized awkwardly you didn’t know what to do now. The obvious thing was to go but it’s not like you wanted to go.

“I have to go,” Jungkook said, looking at something on his phone. He thrust it towards you and you were confused enough to take it from him. He had it open to the New Message screen, cursor blinking in the “To:” field.

“I will send the picture.”

“Oh! Right.” Yes, of course, obviously that made sense. You typed your number in and handed it back. 

“Ok, goodbye. I have to go but just wait, ok? I will send it.”

“Yeah, of course. Sure. And oh my god, thank you for bringing me back here and um, enjoy the rest of the festival!”

He was laughing and you didn’t quite know why but he smiled and nodded and pressed his hands together, “Yes. Thank you. Have fun too. Talk back to me.”

You nodded. He was gone so fast, bodyguard closing behind him as he set off. He did look like he had somewhere to be. You did not and your mind was blown about this whole thing. You were too flustered to even think about the fact you were unsupervised in the VIP backstage section right now. 

Paranoid you were going to get kicked out since you didn’t have a lanyard anyway, you walked quickly out of security and didn’t stop until you’d found a place you could step out of the way and guzzle the water bottle. You pulled your phone out of your pocket to text your friends, or at least see if they’d texted you.

You did have messages, but not from your deadbeat friends. Already! You already had a message!

[unknown]: what is your name?

[y/n]: y/n

[JJK]: ok 

[JJK]: [group photo]

[JJk]: thank you for hanging out

[y/n]: no thank you for taking me backstage with you! It was a dream come true to meet them. that was really thoughtful and cool of you even just to make sure I could see

[JJK]: the view is important at a concert so we both had a better view

You froze. You stared. 

No. Was he… flirting?!!? Impossible. You must be misunderstanding. You had to be misunderstanding!

[y/n]: It was perfect

[y/n]: thank you for trusting me enough to message me the photo but also shouldn’t you not trust people you just met???

[JJK]: why not

[JJK]: my name is JK you can put it in your phone

Lord have mercy. 

[JJK]: I do not give my phone number but it is nice to meet you so I did

[y/n]: Nice to meet you too JK thanks for hanging out

[your friend]: hey where are you? McMavis done? You ready to meet up?

You hesitated. Your original excitement to tell them about meeting Jungkook was still bubbling, but in light of the fact he had given you his phone number and was flirting you decided maybe you wouldn’t share that part of your day with them. Not yet anyway. 

You told your friends where you’d meet them and looked at your phone again.

[JJK]: what bands do you like? Suggest music to me

[y/n]: ok you too

[y/n]: have you heard of…

Your stomach bubbled with anticipation as you went to meet your friends. Maybe this would be nothing. He’d stop texting you suddenly and that would be that. He’d get a new phone and lose your number. He’d text you for the rest of the festival but then block you and move on. You had zero expectations he would keep talking to you. Why would he?

But you hadn’t expected to see him. Or to sing and dance with him. Or to meet McMavis with him. Definitely not for him to take a photo with you –which you now had!-- and allow you access to his phone number. That gesture of faith meant so much to you. You wouldn’t disappoint him. 

You held your phone with your secret close to your chest and went to meet your friends. 

#idol jungkook #idol jk x oc #jeon jungkook x you #jungkook x reader #jungkook fanfic #jeon jungkook fluff #bts drabble #bts fanfic #jungkook ff #jungkook imagine #jungkook au

[imagine-knb]

Headcanons for the Uncrowned Kings please. They catch their s/o looking at baby/childhood pictures of the boys. Bonus if she remarks "To think, this cutie-pie grew up into such a handsome young man "

Ah, I love finding old pictures of my s/o, it's always so cute seeing how they've changed over the years! Admin Neon

Kiyoshi

he catches you in his living room with his grandparents, the three of you leaning over a few books that he recognized the second he walked into the room

"ah, really? we don't need to look at those..." — he's a bit embarrassed by the sudden attention on his childhood photos, evidenced by the slight tinge of pink on his cheeks and the single hand nervously rubbing at the back of his neck

he isn't rude however and sits down alongside you, opposite his grandparents, and now the four of you are viewing the pictures

his embarrassment only increases when his grandmother starts telling you the stories behind some of the more embarrassing pictures — "he insisted that day he was perfectly fine wandering around the house without a diaper or his knickers on!"

the next time Kiyoshi is over at your house, he's asking your parents for pictures of you as a kid as revenge

Mibuchi

when he finds you, you're seated in his room with an open baby book on your lap, silently cooing over the adorable pictures

"are those my baby pictures?" — Mibuchi is more surprised than anything that his parents had left you with the precious albums

he actually doesn't seem embarrassed at all with you gushing over every photographs and he even points out to you some of his favorites from times he can remember and other from when he couldn't

"my parents kept this set of clothes, I think. it's probably hidden away in their closet somewhere, hold on" — he goes to fetch the tiny set of trousers and a button up and you can't help but squeal when you see it because it is so small

Mibuchi is very insistant that he gets to see all of your baby photos now, but he won't push it if you really don't want to show him — he'll just as your mom later

Nebuya

his parents liked to hang pictures up on the walls, so it was only a matter of time before you came over and saw them — he just didn't expect you to be staring at them for so long

"oh my god, you were such a chubby baby, your poor mother" — this has him absolutely chortling with laughter because he had always been a bit on the bigger side

because of his parents' penchant for hanging up every picture, Nebuya had plenty of time to prepare himself for the inevitability of you seeing them, so he's actually not as embarrassed as he thought he would be

that doesn't stop him from trying to usher you out of the hallway where they hung as quickly as possible

unfortunately for him, his parents have hung pictures on every wall, so you get distracted every few steps by another photo catching your interest — the walk to his room is a long one

Hayama

when he sees the contents of the polaroids his mom handed you, Hayama is instantly red in the face and trying to cover them up with his hands — he manages to knock them to the ground instead

he instantly stoops to try and pick them up before you can, and for the most part he's able to with his quick hands, but you still manage to snag a few

unfortunately you've snagged the more embarrassing ones — ones where he's being an absolute brat, photo taken mid-tantrum — and now Hayama is trying to snag those from you as well

he chases you around the room, around the house, anywhere just to try and get the photos back

eventually he gives up on his chase — you'd had them in your hands for so long already, you probably already saw every detail — and just trails after you with an embarrassed pout, begging you not to say anything about them

Hanamiya

the two of you are out on a date when you receive a text from his mom — "oh my GOD" — and at your outburst, he looks over your shoulder to see what she's sent you

it's one of his baby photos where he's completely nude in the bath and the second he sees it, he's reaching for your phone to try and delete it

"fuck off, Makoto! I'm keeping this one" "like hell you are!"

he's trying not to show that he's embarrassed by the photograph, but it's clearly evidenced by the red that's flushing his normally pale complexion and the fact he's trying so hard to grab at your phone

he's completely done for when you mention that the little mole on his ass cheek, asking him if it was still there — he walks away from you after that, trying his best to ignore his burning face and your insistent questions

#kiyoshi #mibuchi #nebuya #hayama #hanamiya #uk

[hellshire-harlot]

Hi, I wanted to ask if you think that Wesker preyed on Rebecca given the existence of her easter egg and RE0 Wesker Mode? I came across different opinions from he's a creep to they are only non canon goofs and I am still uncertain about it. Personally I really hope that they have no deeper canon meaning because Wesker being attracted to a 18 year old would be very creepy.

Sorry for bothering you!

heya! Thanks for the question :)

My short answer is no, I don’t think Wesker was being creepy or preying on Rebecca. Rebecca is also almost certainly over the age of 20, given she’s a licensed police officer, medic, and member of STARS.

My personal interpretation of the photo of Rebecca hidden in Wesker’s desk is that, given the pose Rebecca made for the picture, it was less of Wesker creeping on her and more him crushing on her.

Rebecca’s countenance in the photo, and the fact that she’s intentionally posing, implies that she was fully aware and consenting to the shoot. If anything, the pose she’s in could imply she’s aware of the suggestiveness of the picture, and is playfully leaning into it. I’m not familiar with Rebecca’s past before STARS, but there’s plenty of explanations for why the photo exists.

Maybe it was a promotional thing for STARS. Maybe Rebecca used to be part of a sports team. Maybe it was a personal photo of hers that she and a few friends were just having fun with. Maybe she did some kind of modeling gig for a magazine or something. If Wesker had truly been creeping on her, even stalking her, I’m certain the photograph would have looked a bit more candid. He’s more than capable of sneaking his way, say, into her house and taking pictures of her while she sleeps, but this isn’t a candid photo. It’s Rebecca posing and smiling for the camera.

As for why it’s in Wesker’s desk? Any number of reasons. My personal headcanon is that Wesker has a crush on Rebecca and came upon this photo one way or another, and hid it in his desk as a guilty pleasure. The fact that it’s so well hidden (in both versions of Re2, Leon has to search the desk 50 times before the undeveloped photo is found) implies either that Wesker was worried about being caught by someone going through his things (unlikely, given his status and reputation that would scare off anyone snooping in his office) or that he’s embarrassed about his crush and is intentionally squirreling it away from himself.

Some other little tidbits I know of that may point to Wesker crushing on Rebecca (and it maybe even being mutual) are even present in the games. Wesker very intentionally shoots Rebecca directly in the chest, where he likely knew she would be wearing a bulletproof vest and would remain relatively unharmed. The amount of admiration STARS has for him implies that he’s a diligent captain, so he probably would have double checked before the mission began to make sure Rebecca was wearing her gear, including said bulletproof vest. The fact that he very deliberately shot her in a way he knew wouldn’t be fatal or even leave a lasting wound when he could have easily killed her on the spot implies that for whatever reason, Wesker didn’t want Rebecca dead. He spares people in RE1 pretty much exclusively if they’re useful to him; Barry because he’s the one Wesker’s blackmailing, Chris because he genuinely admires him and seemingly wants to recruit him to his side, and Jill because she was just to resilient for him to kill. But why else would he spare Rebecca, someone relatively unassuming when compared to Chris, unless he had a soft spot for her?

I could go on for hours about how Rebecca’s career path post-Arklay and her choice to become an influential scientist may have been her way of dealing with the grief of her crush, Wesker, being a traitor, or how the admiration she holds for him could be more than just strictly platonic, but this is already a long post. Hopefully this answered your question!

#Rebecca Chambers #Albert Wesker #Resident Evil #Biohazard #Rebecca Chambers X Albert Wesker #Do they have a ship name? #Rebesker #Thats what I’m going with #Lore #theories #anonymous #asks #The Glenvale Courier #stalking mention

[kindheart525]

One trend in the fandom I’ve never understood is when people write Pinkie’s parents (or at least her dad) as abusive. Not just emotionally neglectful or harsh, but physically abusive too. It honestly leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I don’t only say this because I personally like the Pie family—let me explain.

I do understand that the fandom had very little to go off of before “Hearthbreakers,” but in my opinion nothing about the flashback from Season 1 suggests an abusive home. The worst that rock farm was is…boring? And Pinkie’s family clearly approved of her first party. If they were really abusive, they probably would have punished Pinkie for it. And I know that Pinkie is an unreliable narrator who tends to exaggerate things (for example, her parents probably didn’t immediately start dancing wildly lol), but I don’t think she would outright lie, nor would she so openly tell a group of local kids about her upbringing if it carried such bad memories. You also have the photo in “Pinkie Pride” proving that her first party actually happened and her family was happy and smiling.

Once “Hearthbreakers” did air, I think it even further weakened any claims that Pinkie’s family is abusive. Pinkie not only cheerfully went home to spend Hearth’s Warming with her family, but she also invited Applejack, one of her closest friends, and her family members to join them. I don’t think most people from abusive/toxic upbringings would be so exuberant about spending the holidays with said family, or willingly subject a close friend to their toxic family members, but that’s only my perspective. Throughout the episode Pinkie was super affectionate with her parents and her sisters (except Limestone) and they seemed to enjoy her presence too! They seemed to genuinely love each other, even Limestone smiled at the end!

Some interpretations more specifically portray Igneous and Cloudy in a loveless marriage, which I don’t think is accurate either. An arranged marriage between two adults does not always end up unhealthy, plenty do make it work. In all of their appearances, Igneous and Cloudy seemed to enjoy each other’s company from my perspective, at least as much as their limited expressions would show. In the episode where Maud gets her rocktorate, you can even see Igneous patting Cloudy’s back as she’s crying! I think he just has a resting scowl, he seems to care about his wife and family otherwise.

Even with Limestone, although her first speaking role did not paint her very favorably, I wouldn’t write her off as abusive either. I won’t try to excuse her trying to intimidate a child, nor will I ignore that she and Pinkie didn’t seem to get along so well during that episode. She was incredibly territorial over her home and her family’s boulder, but I don’t think that necessarily means she would end up becoming a spouse- or child-beater. Remember that in this episode her family also had guests over, which would heighten her instinct to protect the family and home that she’s clearly loyal to, if very rudely. Even by the end of that episode, she came around and was seen sharing food with the guests, showing she does have a warmer side in there somewhere. “The Maud Couple” proved this further by showing her offering genuine advice to mediate a conflict between her sisters! Someone with abusive tendencies, I believe, would be more likely to shut such an issue down with no discussion. In that episode we got to see what she is like solely in the company of her own family members, when she’s not grandstanding for guests—under abusive circumstances, her behavior would be worse behind closed doors, not better.

And, again, Pinkie clearly trusts her family enough to willingly travel back to her childhood home during what she saw as a stressful time. If it were unhealthy she wouldn’t have done that.

I think some people misinterpret the Pies being dull and gruff as signs of something worse under the surface. Or they see parts of something familiar to them in Pinkie so they rewrite her backstory to reflect that. That’s fine and valid, but I think it’s unfair to insist that any evidence of family abuse comes from the show itself. Yes, they do not act openly affectionate like other families, but Maud is that way too. And isn’t that the point of her character? That someone who expresses themselves differently is no less capable of love and friendship? I think that extends to the rest of the Pies as well. I think they are better than some give them credit for.

TL;DR: Pinkie Pie’s family isn’t abusive. I know it’s long but I’m passionate about these characters lmao

#KindsThoughts #my little pony #mlp fim #mlp g4 #igneous rock pie #cloudy quartz #limestone pie #maud pie #pinkie pie #marble pie #pie family #pie sisters #tw abuse mention #cw abuse mention

[souryogurt64]

if ppl start acting like the musicians on petes label are actually good....

What I'm about to say is about C/arr only but I did not enjoy her set. I had no opinions about her going into the concert at all so I had zero expectations. I have massively enjoyed almost all of FOB's other openers over the years I've seen so I expected to enjoy this too. I also would not be posting this or saying anything and I would have kept my opinion to myself if it were not for the blow-up dolls.

And I want to preface this by saying the mix was also not good which was probably not her fault, and maybe I would have a different opinion of the set if the mix was better. It was very difficult to hear the vocal line at all and it was difficult to pick out anything except a word here or there. So because of that, I just had to focus on the other elements of the show.

But anyway, to start off with. I'm pretty sure this was during C/arr's set but it applies to Royal's backing band too. As clarification, I think Royal is a great performer, I enjoy her music, her feature on that Demi Lovato song is amazing, and I thought the costumes during her performance at the Cincinnati show and the way they worked with her set were impressively well-thought out.

But the guys in the backing band, especially C/arr's backing band, were overacting to the point where it was very distracting and it was clear they were doing stuff that looked cool in photos but did not match the caliber of what they were performing or what was actually being played. I know I said I couldn't hear WELL, but I could hear plenty enough to know it was weird.

I'm not a kid or stupid so I know this is a performance and that's showbiz. But the thing that pushed it over the line from cringy into "unpleasant to watch" was that whenever the photographers came out, one of the guys would start really obviously lip syncing to words that were not even close to what was actually being sung to get a better shot. Like she wouldn't be singing anything and he wouldn't be near the microphone but if a photographer got close he would start passionately mouthing words. I also was under the impression the instrument stuff equally overacted, but I am not a musician or like a professional or anything.

In any case, I found it unsettling and it made me feel gross and skeeved out that I had paid so much money to see Pete Wentz when he was trying to sell this crap and it was embarrassing to watch, but I already knew that about him so whatever.

But the blow-up dolls elevated Ca/rr's performance from "whatever opener with bad sound quality I'd forget in a week" to "One of the worst sets I've ever sat through" The blow-up dolls were way too heavy, I got hit directly in the head with one, it really hurt, and it knocked my tiara off. Granted, I am wimpier than the average person but they legitimately fucking hurt to get hit with, no one was responding well to them, and one of my mutuals who attended a different show and is like a bigger dude also complained to me unprompted about how much it hurt to get hit with them.

I also was not a fan of the whole "shirt that said daddy on it plus a tutu" thing that was going on, I get that music/aesthetic can be cool and fun and it's part of artistic expression and everyone has their own style and I like plenty of artists who have explicit lyrics or wear costumes, like I love Emo Boy by Ayesha Erotica or and Bathroom Bitch by Holychild. I am not trying to moralize here. There are just good costumes and good sets and good sound and good backing bands and good props then then are bad ones. Also, I'm not going to pretend that Pete didn't wear that one Halloween costume that one time.

I'm unsure if she was acting or not and if it was intended to be part of the performance but her attitude was kind of unpleasant and at my show she seemed mad the audience was not responding well and it made the blow up doll thing feel more vindictive than something intended to be entertaining that backfired, but again, she may have been acting as part of the performance or upset about the sound quality.

I get why they could think stuff like the blow up dolls are cool because Hey Chris would throw blow-up sex dolls into the audience and stuff like that is like in videos of early FOB sets or whatever. And I get Pete has always thought that it's funny to throw things at people and he legitimately has always been very into like certain reality TV stuff or whatever so I can get why he would think stuff like this would go over well but I did not think this was an enjoyable set to watch and I feel confident in saying everyone around me felt the same way.

You are not Hey Chris, and this isn't a $5 Arma Angelus concert at a bowling alley, this is a concert that cost $1k and a good chunk of PTO to see, which, if you live the kind of the life where you "never had any goals of being a singer" but still "get introduced" to celebrities anyway, that probably doesn't mean anything.

But if I wanted to have people throw heavy objects at my head on purpose I would go back to high school gym class. I would not ever want to experience that at a show like this.

To clarify, I understand shit happens at concerts and you can get hit or hurt or whatever but I have attended over 60 and seen Fall Out Boy 5 other times, including many where inflatables were used or there was stuff like crowdsurfing/wall of death/moshing. I've participated in all of that and always really enjoyed it, and I've also been more seriously injured at shows and been fine with it because it certain expectations were set in advance.

I've seen other really bad shows too, but the blow up dolls were maybe in the top 3 worst concert elements I've experienced ever. Fall Out Boy used inflatables during their set as well but they weighed probably less than a third of what the blow up dolls did and were also fully inflated. I did not feel how heavy the blow up dolls were was situationally appropriate for this kind of show. The pit was also the smallest arena pit I've ever been in so there was nowhere for them to go.

BTW, as comparison-- Bring Me The Horizon also performed that night. I had no opinion of them going into it and hadn't heard any of their songs either but I have nothing but amazing things to say about their performance. It sounds like their shows are usually a lot heavier with moshing and the Wall of Death and stuff. It was clear they knew what the expectations that had been set for this tour were, and they put a lot of thought and care into modifying their usual set and aesthetic into something that Fall Out Boy's fans were going to love.

It was phenomenal, I enjoyed the whole thing, and I was so impressed with how much they clearly cared about and respected FOB's fans that I will always have a soft spot for the band now. Fall Out Boy have always had openers from lots of different genres and they normally do great, but the first opener was not it.

[blucifer08]

So I haven't done a "propaganda post" for the @woltourney in a while, so I figured I'd make another! I struggled to think of what I wanted to put for this one, but I finally decided on something. The thing that is most striking to me about Naru is the way she fights, and I'd like to share a little about the inspiration for how I write about her prowess on the battlefield.

As such, I will be putting this under a readmore, as it does contain descriptions of violence; all wols have to face danger on the battlefield after all!

You can vote here!

(also woltourney i'm not actually sure if descriptions of violence are against the rules for propaganda; if so just lmk and i will remove ;v; i couldn't find anything on the blog but i may have missed it)

!!!!!! so cw for gore and violence under the readmore, and here's a photo of Naru to go with it :) !!!!!!

Naru grew up as a toddler mostly alone. She was eventually picked up by Magnai when he found her out on the Steppe and he took her in as a younger sister. Naru's family had all been killed. As such, she had needed to manage on her own for a long time. This involved learning to hunt and kill animals on her own.

This wasn't easy. She had only a dull knife and needed to learn to carve out the right parts of the animal to eat, and a lot of it was trial and error. As such, she became pretty good at dismembering things.

So for Naru's fighting style, I took a lot of inspiration from a passage from the Zhuangzi. The Zhuangzi is a Daoist text (and a philosopher) full of short passages from which you can derive certain lessons about the world and about Daoism. It's a very complicated text and I spent a lot of time in classes in University going over it. (Funnily enough I feel like every professor had different ideas about what the texts inside meant.._

But there's one passage in particular that has always been my favorite.

Cook Ding laid down his knife and replied, "What I care about is the Way, which goes beyond skill. When I first began cutting up oxen, all I could see was the ox itself. After three years I no longer saw the whole ox. And now I go _ at it by spirit and don't look with my eyes. Perception and understanding have come to a stop and spirit moves where it wants. I go along with the natural makeup, strike in the big hollows, guide the knife through the big openings, and follow things as they are. So I never touch the smallest ligament or tendon, much less a main joint. "A good cook changes his knife once a year because he cuts. A mediocre cook changes his knife once a month because he hacks. I've had this knife of mine for nineteen years and I've cut up thousands of oxen with it, and yet the blade is as good as though it had just come from the grindstone. There are spaces between the joints, and the blade of the knife has really no thickness. If you insert what has no thickness into such spaces, then there's plenty of room more than enough for the blade to play about in. That's why after nineteen years the blade of my knife is still as good as when it first came from the grindstone.

This is from the Burtson Watson translation, I believe!

So yeah, it's this short little story about a butcher not needing to change his knife. The effort you will have to expend to do something is easier if you follow along the natural way. If you cut through the joins, you need not hack through bone. And this is how I've pictured Naru managing to get through her childhood--she had one shitty dull knife, but figured out that it would work as long as she cut correctly. And this gives her an edge in battle-- a horribly terrifying one, but an edge nonetheless. She is able to size people up and figure out the best places to cut. Here's a section from a fic I'm working on as comparison.

Slipping in and around the footmen is not that hard, really. They’re not prepared for someone as fast as her. Her eyes gravitate immediately to their weak points. Gaps in armor, gaps in clothing. Her blade slices through the elbow of an arm holding a weapon. She drags her knife through the back of a knee, sending someone to the ground. Every movement of her shoulder, every step she takes, every pressure of her joints while she swiftly and lightly wields her knife, all of this was as carefully planned and prepared as the routine of a dancer.

Every man is divided into parts. 

A good carver may change her knife once a year, but Naru has used the same knife all these years. One needs only to insert the thin blade in those places with space, cut through what need be cut and preserve what is left of your blade. 

Every man is divided into parts.

Naru makes it to the giant machine upon which rides the man she has been tasked with killing. She cannot divide the machine into the parts from which it was created; she knows not how it was built and from where it came. Instead she climbs the metal beast. Soldiers reach up to try and grab hold of her, drag her down. Others shoot wildly at her and by the tiniest stroke of luck, the bullets miss. The man at the control starts to throw the machine into a frenzy.

She grabs hold of some gap in the metal and hoists herself up to the top of the machine. She carefully keeps her balance, tilting her weight this way and that in order to keep herself at an equilibrium. Her tail swishes wildly for this effort. Every man is divided into parts. 

She takes a breath and leaps upon him. He unsheathes a sword but he doesn’t have time to harm her with it. Her blade makes it under his chin and slices that vein that gives life, releases his blood unto the world and all over her body. He sputters, grunts, groans. Blood drips from under his mask, choking on his own ichor. 

She has sliced a part that gives life, divided him from life and into death.

So, yeah! That's where Naru's fighting style really takes inspiration from. She is one of those fighters who kinda shuts off her mind a little and acts on natural instinct--it's just her instinct is good. She's calculated. It makes me happy, it's a point of pride for me. I did a lot of studying Chinese religion in school and I took many classes that went over the origins of Daoism and they always go over the Zhuangzi and make you read some of it, and I just always love to get to this passage. There are many other great passages too, though! But that's a conversation of it's own haha

That's my "propaganda post" this time around, I really just wanted an excuse to share one of my favorite things about Naru. I know it's long so if you ended up reading this far: thank you! and consider giving Naru your vote :D

#woltourney #naru #lore #i'll also tag as #blucithoughts #gore #violence

[lacomandante]

        Okay so I’m gonna totally post these out of order so bear with me LOL. There are plenty more to follow!!!

         May 5th, we visited the Santuario de Nossa Senhora do Cabo Espichel, along the coastline of Portugal. This was one of the few locations actually located in the Iberian Peninsula that was used in Sharpe (and this one specifically in Rifles), so getting the chance to visit this gorgeous location was incredible. It was a beautiful day, and there were very few people visiting, so we got a wonderful tour of it overall- I only wish the giant ugly signs weren’t there :(. It’s really interesting to compare the buildings from then and now- a lot of damage from the harsh weather of the coastline and time has chipped away at it. All of the windows and doors of the long hostel houses were sealed with concrete, and much was in disrepair that we did see. The song that plays during this shot in Rifles was stuck in my head the whole time.

        We got a chance to visit the church as well, as when we first got there it was closed, so we felt very lucky to go inside! And the interior looks almost the same as it did in Rifles, except there has been extensive work done to preserve the paintings and statues inside. Sadly, there weren’t any photos allowed inside (though Sam snuck two of me in there, I won’t post them here for reasons I’ll explain in a bit). It was just me, Luca, and Sam inside, as well as a volunteer who looked after the building: we whispered very quietly among ourselves and looked at the beautiful artwork and sculptures, and went to the little souvenir table. We asked Luca how to say how much something was in Portuguese, when Filipa, the volunteer, told us in English that we didn’t have to whisper LOL. We all laughed at that.

       I ended up asking her out of curiosity as to why no photographs were allowed, as I had seen some online. Apparently because this location isn’t visited often and in very poor condition, people have stolen and continue to steal a lot from the sanctuary and surrounding area. About two weeks before we came, someone broke into the prophet’s house (not pictured) and shattered the glass and I believe were trying to steal tiles. So it was understandable, but disappointing, as the church hosts the most elaborate and expensive parts of the sanctuary. There are plenty of photos of the interior on the internet, and people sneak photos, but it was the principal of the matter and I don’t want Filipa to be disappointed in me for posting them and I want to respect that rule, (even if we broke it in private...oops) so I won’t.

       We spent a good half hour just chatting with her about the area and its history, and she showed us photos of the reconstruction, and she was incredibly kind and so knowledgeable. It was a long shot, but I had shown her photos of the praying scene that follows their arrival to this spot in the film, and Sam and I had done extensive research to figure out where it was, to no avail- it didn’t match this location, and Filipa confirmed that she had been inside every part of the sanctuary, and it wasn’t there, and we exchanged contact info because she wanted to try and figure it out. Later that night she apparently did research and confirmed where it actually was- in another sanctuary in Sintra, “more abandoned than this one!” she said. She used to actually live by it- I was blown away with her kindness and dedication to finding it after all that. So next time we visit Portugal, that will be on the list! It’s incredible that just on a whim I decided to ask; it couldn’t hurt, could it? And it turned out that she managed to locate exactly where it was. It’s so wild how that all worked out but it was SUCH an awesome experience and Filipa was the coolest person ever!!!

        It’s sad that rooms were all boarded up. Apparently the location is shared by government, the nearby town, and the monastery, and all three have been fighting over what to do with it. Many want the hostel to open again, which would allow money to flood in to be put towards restorations that are very badly needed, and bring more people to see the sanctuary. But on the other hand, people didn’t want this place to become a tourist attraction. Filipa herself said it she would prefer it to reopen and draw more people, than to let it suffer its current fate- it’ll only get worse with time and the harsh weather. I have more photos that I’ll post later surrounding the site- the ocean view was beautiful from here! It really is a gorgeous location, if not quite isolated.

#;kiran goes to spain 2023 #(block that tag if you don't want to see my posts LOL) #sharpe's rifles #sharpe #;ooc #(i bought a keychain from Filipa #(its got a picture of the church and the long buildings and a picture of the statue of mary on the back thats inside) #(i really love that keychain!! its on my keyring now) #(i got a postcard as well and a really cute polaroid sam took of me ;w;) #(SAM IM SORRY I FUCKED UP THE ONLY PHOTO OF YOU HERE WITH THE STRING OF THE CAMERA)

[morvantmortuary]

Who do you order the plushies from?! I’d love to get a chibi Laszlo for moral support.

Okay!! Thank you for your patience nonny, I had a draft of this the night you sent it in but then tumblr ate it, and I've been running around getting ready to travel for a bit, BUT! I'm somewhere where I'm stationary for a while, so I have plenty of time.

Welcome to Rae's Guide to Having a Plushie Problem ✨

Before we get started, a disclaimer on my part of Yes, I Know; I don't know why plushies are my main vice, I've been like this since I was little and I'm sure it has something to do with my attachment style/being kinda lonely as a Weird KidTM or something etc. etc. I only just got into commissioned plushes during the pandemic, and I tend to save up and order them around my birthday or holidays, bc they definitely tend to be my big splurge purchase for special occasions. :'D

This just means I have a decent amount of experience, though, and can hopefully help you make your choice!

So, primarily I tend to seek out plush artists on Etsy, so most of my links will be through there. You're welcome to search "plush commissions" or some variation of that phrase there to see what you can turn up, but I'm more than happy to walk you through the listings I've used before. For each of them, you'll definitely want to take a look at their initial price range and then contact them directly about what you have in mind for Las - have a couple reference photos for him in the outfit you have in mind to send to whichever one you choose, so that way if the price will go up depending on time needed/materials they can let you know. But also, know that depending on the size of the doll, outfit details might get simplified to some degree, so be ready to decide what traits you definitely want to keep/which ones you'd be willing to minimize.

(I'm so sorry if you already know how this process works, I just tend to overexplain things, both from a teacher and an ADHD standpoint :'D)

Tiny!Maxi and Tiny!Hex are from an artist in the UK called NoizFoxy - she's a sweetheart to work with, and asks lots of great questions about details. For Maxi, I sent her the reference art by my friend Toni that I've shown y'all before, and for Hex I just sent her a photo of Diego from my favorite photoshoot. She has multiple sizes of plush available in her listing at varying price points, so feel free to take a look for yourself; I like having the boys at 8cm bc I appreciate being able to sneak them into a purse or my work bag or whatever when I'm having an anxious day (and it makes it easier to take photos ngl). I maybe carry them around a little more than she'd recommend (Maxi's got a little bit of hair on the side of his head that's starting to come unglued), but he held up through me rotating him in my hand all through my exams and on all sorts of adventures so far, so I just consider it a sign of him being loved Velveteen Rabbit-style. <3

(Here they are close up for detail purposes, from when we first got Hex.)

If you’re looking for something a little bigger, I would recommend flightydollies, who’s based out of Texas! Their plush are made of fleece and felt, and tend to stand just a little taller than chibi!Maxi and Zemo (who I write about down below). They make characters from a dizzying array of fandoms, so definitely check their page to see if there’s anyone else you’d like! I know for a fact though that they’d be a great choice to make Laszlo or Zemo - because I asked them to make both for me a couple birthdays ago:

As you can see, they both came out beautifully, and they hold court on my dresser with my bat collection. <3 I don't tend to take them with me when I travel, bc I don't want to upset any of the details she attached in layers, but she stitches them very sturdily specifically to be loved on, they make wonderful little cheerleaders when I'm working!

If you want to consider less conventional plush types, like the tsum/stackable style plush, bbearpops is a lovely young artist based in Florida who makes those with all sorts of personalization options. They're most active on Insta if you want to look at their work beforehand, and they make tsums in multiple sizes as listed on their etsy (from 3 inches to 12, though IIRC I think you can ask for up to 17" if that's a workable price range for you). She used to work mostly in fleece, but I think for a slight upcharge she's recently started offering to make her plush in minky fabric as well. She's made a huge array of characters, so I think a Las in her style could potentially be really cute! Definitely check out her past creations, she manages to make them really detailed despite the sleeker anatomy!

Their insta can be found here, if you’d like to do some browsing!

If you want something more hugging-sized (11-15 inches), there's also APairAPlushies! She was also a sweetheart to work with, adding in lot of details I wasn't expecting to my commissioned Maxi, and her plushies tend to heftier in size/bulk - they'd go better in an overnight bag/suitcase, maybe not so much in a daily backpack. But if you need something to squish or hug really hard (or bury your face in and scream), this is the model for you! :D

(My photo of this version of Maxi is absolutely refusing to upload for some reason, but if you look at her etsy page, you’ll get a good idea. She surprised me with included bloodstains hidden under his waistcoat and a bloody knife crafted from eva foam, which was super sweet of her!)

If you want something a bit more detailed and articulated, then I would suggest StitchyButton - they have a blog here on tumblr and a twitter where they regularly post their work, and they make a variety of plush types! The version I recommend myself is the Cuddle variety, which is the largest on this list. It tends to have more exaggerated features, and is the perfect size to sit in your lap/on your bed. Their arms are bent at the elbows, which feels a bit like being hugged back at times if that's something you're in the market for :'D And because their legs are somewhat bent at the knees, they sit very well on shelves/ledges/boxes/etc! But Stitchy also makes dolls that are narrower in design that are more for decoration/admiring from afar, and they also-also make smaller bunny/kitten plushies that they'll dress up and add details to so they look like your character of choice (you can even buy them in pairs for your favorite ship, if you have one!). They're a fabulous artist, and while this entry is definitely on the expensive side of this list, they're absolutely worth it for their artistry. Their attention to detail is stunning, and every little touch is expertly made! If you're looking for a Las in a really specific outfit (like his dinner jacket from Delmonico's, or his big fluffy coat), this would be the one I recommend for sure. Please definitely browse their socials, even if you decide you want a different type of plush: their work is so pretty, I legitimately love going through and looking at other dolls they've made just for fun sometimes.

Featured for example purposes: Maxi, whom you've seen before! The light isn’t the best for all the little details, but he has tiny buttons on his waistcoat and little pocket flaps, and his hair is floppy and moveable with the way it’s attached. I didn’t even think she’d take the time to attach his watch, but it’s beautiful!

The most expensive item on this list would be the cotton/Kpop style dolls I've had made for both Maxi and Zemo - they can be made in multiple sizes, but are most usually found in 15 cm and 20 cm. In my experience, they also take a good amount longer than all the other plush on this list (bc you're usually ordering them exclusively from an artist overseas who's either embroidering the face/body details themselves, or has a connection with a factory that can do so). But they're the only ones that have removable clothes, and you can buy premade clothes/outfits/accessories for them on sites like am*z*n and aliexpress, if that's a selling point for you at all. (Though for a character like Las, I don't know that it would have a lot of appeal - most of the clothes that are ready-made tend to be ultra modern and brightly colored, in my experience. So unless you really want to see him in a pink hoodie or a bunny onesie, you probably won't have a lot of alternate options for him). However, this is a kind that's really popular in other countries, so you can find all sorts of interesting things for them if you know where to look. I actually have invested in a couple sort-of cheaper doll ita bags to customize/carry them around in, if I ever wanted to (which I've been meaning to make a separate post about for ages but just haven't got around to it, that being a hobby my adhd brain picked up over this last semester :'D).

Maxi was one I commissioned directly from a company over Twitter, and that was by far my most expensive purchase experience, so I'm not going to rec that info to you unless you ask me specifically bc I don't want to wish that on anybody lmao. (There were a couple moments I thought something was included in what I'd already paid that I then ended up having to pay for separately, I'll put it that way. Everyone was perfectly nice, it was just more than I was expecting based on my initial quote, which happens.) 

But for Zemo, I worked with Meizai on Etsy. She's a lovely person, and though her process has definitely started taking longer due to her growing popularity/COVID restrictions coming and going, she's definitely worth the wait and someone I'd order from again. She includes designing your doll from a reference photo in her base price for the doll itself (which is something other artists can charge for separately, depending on where you go), and the doll itself is usually always the same price (though depending on the level of embroidery/face and body detail involved, that could vary). The part where it can get about the same range as Stichy above is the outfit - she counts custom clothes as a separate order (as many places with similar dolls do), and that range can vary also depending on how detailed you'd want the outfit. A minimalist version of Zemo's clothes (which you can see in the photo below) ran me about the basic amount she usually has for clothes, but depending on what you'd want for Las/which outfit you have in mind, it might go up. Bc her process takes more time, you can sometimes go a while without hearing updates, but she tends to respond pretty quickly whenever I sent her a hello/progress inquiry. I think she's got new orders closed rn bc she's trying to keep up with her current batch, but if this is the style of doll you're inclined towards, I'd definitely keep an eye on her for when she opens them again!

(Behold! A smug chibi!Baron, with a funko pop for size/detail comparison.)

Okay, nonny, this is where my expertise runs out. Thanks for letting me babble at you about these artists; they're all a delight to work with and consummate pros in my experience, so no matter which one you pick, you’ll be in good hands! I also just really love plush as an artform as well as my main bad habit lmao. If you have any more questions, I'll be happy to answer them! Just let me know what's up, and thanks for your patience in the meantime <3 I'd love to see photos of your Laszlo, however he turns out (or even just when you get a concept sketch), and I hope he's everything you need in terms of moral support! Sending you lots of love from our neck of the woods! <3

#nice people #nonny!! #the misadventures of tiny!maxi and hex #chibi!maxi #and then rarae says #my time of v specific plush commission knowledge has come!!!

[griefpersevering]

the ripples they cause

Read chapter nine on AO3 now!!

Here's a snippet:

Karen weaves in and out of hallways, trying to find the right ward. Hospital staff bustle past her, purple staining the underneath of their eyes like bruises, but there are no patients in this part of the building.

There are eight million people living in New York, and it’s Karen’s job to know how they spend their time. First, as a journalist for the Bulletin, but also as a private investigator. Even though they had turned to dust a few weeks later, Karen couldn’t let go of Nelson, Murdock & Page, so she’d kept up her end of the bargain throughout the Blip.

Jessica Jones investigates whatever is brought to her door, whether that is a cheating partner or a missing person. Karen, on the other hand, decided to specialize in what she investigated: people who lied about being Blipped.

It’s an odd phenomenon. After half the population turned to dust, plenty of people saw the chaos as an opportunity to fake their deaths or change their identity. She’s surprised more people didn’t think of it. With the state the government was in - is still in, if she’s being honest - they have no way of checking exactly who everyone is.

The person she is trying to find is a perfect example of someone who saw the opportunity and took it. No loving family member has come to her because they suspect he is alive, though. Karen is here to see him with her own eyes, to check that what she’s heard is true before she tells anyone.

A nurse stops her at the door, blocking her path with hands on his hips. “What?”

Karen blinks. “Uh… My name is Karen Page. I’m currently investigating a missing persons case and I have reason to believe that they might be in your ward.”

The nurse huffs, not moving from where he stands. “And?”

“May I go inside to see whether they’re here or not?” Karen says, raising an eyebrow.

“No.”

Karen opens her mouth to say something but closes it again, not sure how to answer. She hesitates before opening her handbag, rifling through it. “I have a photo I could show you instead, then–”

“I don’t want to see it.”

She fishes it out anyway, holding it up. “Is this man on your ward?”

“No.”

“You didn’t even look.”

The nurse steps closer to Karen in an attempt to intimidate her, but since the top of his head only reaches her nose, it gives her the impression of a Chihuahua trying to stand up to a German Shepherd.

“Get off my ward,” he hisses.

Karen scoffs. “It’s visiting hours. I’ve shown you a photo and I’ve explained why I’m here. Why are you so insistent on getting me to leave?”

“Spencer!”

Karen and the nurse both start at the sound of the voice behind them. Claire walks up to them, smiling warmly at Karen before turning to scowl at Spencer.

“I’m the one who told Miss. Page that her missing person might be here. Are you going to cause more problems by being unnecessarily rude, or are you going to apologize and let her in?”

Spencer clenches his jaw. “But-”

“No,” Claire interrupts, rolling her eyes. “You go in, Karen. I’ll have a little chat with Spencer here and then join you in a minute.” She takes him by the elbow and firmly steers him into a nearby office, clicking the door shut behind them.

Karen pushes the doors open to the ward, her eyes scanning over each of the bodies lying in the beds. As she expected, it’s too early in the morning for any other visitors to be here, so she has the place to herself.

The noise of her heels clacking against the tiles as she walks down the middle of the beds is unnerving, even to her. She’s been to hospitals enough times to know that they are always busy, so to not even be greeted with a curious head turn is eerie. It’s hard to tell whether she can explain away the lack of nurses to Claire, or if the coma ward is usually this quiet.

Her eyes slide over each unfamiliar face, too afraid to linger on the image of their unmoving bodies. Karen may as well be in a morgue. She’s half considering leaving when her gaze finally locks onto the person she came to see.

He’s lying in the bed furthest from the door, and someone has attempted to give him some privacy by hastily pulling the curtain around him. From where she is standing, though, Karen can see his face plain as day.

Claire was right. Wilson Fisk is here.

Continue reading on AO3.

#lina lore #marvel #mcu #daredevil #karen page #foggy nelson #matt murdock #wilson fisk #my writing #kingpin #claire temple #the ripples they cause

[lindsaystravelblogs3]

Days 88-89  Monday-Tuesday  21-22 August

Monday

We were both pretty whacked from the last few days so decided to spend a restful day in the room.  We both busied ourselves with all the usual things we do, including ringing the kids, and had an easy lunch at our ‘desks’.

I decided I needed to get out for a while and had wanted to go down to the Vistula River, nearly two kilometres away.  I took my camera and binoculars in the hope of seeing some different birds and walked most of the way that our guide had taken us yesterday or the day before.  I could see the river from there and walked across the parklands to get there.  There was a huge water feature down there, with hundreds of water jets dancing up and down in tune with some music, and quite a few people were picnicking there and watching.  Part of the area was closed with some workmen making some repairs but I found an underpass to escape the busy traffic on the big dual carriageway highway and reached the river quite easily.  I couldn’t really get that close to it and almost all the birds were on the far side anyway, but I did identify about six or seven species to add to my Polish list.

I walked a couple of kilometres along the river to a huge tramway bridge with walking/cycling paths along both sides and made my way very gingerly across the wide river and back again.  The bridge is very (very) high and I found it quite frightening, but I had to do it to confirm a couple of my sightings.  One tiny bird I had seen from the bank looked a little like a White Wagtail at two hundred plus metres away (it just flashed momentarily across my binoculars while I was focussing on a Gull) and I went right across the river and saw it on the rocks immediately below my shaking knees.  Worth it?  Maybe, but I really didn’t need the adrenalin!

Once back on the original side of the bridge, I took quite a convoluted path over a hill and back to the parklands, seeing a couple more birds and passing a cordoned-off area with many active beehives in it.  From the signage, I think it may have been part of a scientific research or government project of some sort, but I don’t read Polish so I am really not sure – but there were plenty of bees there anyway.

Back at our room, I was again locked out because the code had been changed again.  Fortunately, Heather heard me banging violently on the door and came out to open the door from the inside where no code was required.  We asked the people at the other hostel associated with our hotel to arrange for it to be fixed – and in due course they did so.  We did a few puzzles together – we have done very few this trip, mainly because we have been woken early most mornings so that we can be ready for the day’s activities and it would be nice to have a few days to just lie in and loll about without trying to fit in with other people’s timings.

We went out to dinner at a restaurant around the corner and when we got back, the code had been fixed and we were able to get into our room again.

Tuesday. So endeth our Warsaw sojourn.

We were in our room for most of the day, reading, writing and sorting/editing photos, as well as packing ready to leave well before dawn tomorrow.

We had booked a food tour for 3 pm and had to meet our guide a bit over a kilometre away so walked up there around 2:30.  I decided not to take my backpack with my heavy camera, but forgot that my spare hearing aid batteries were in the backpack.  Sure enough, a few minutes before we met our guide, my aid warned me that the battery was dying so I rushed back to our room to get a replacement - only to find I was locked out again - for the fourth time.  We think the cleaners assume we are leaving each day and reset the locks when they leave.

By now, I was late for the tour, but I called in at the hostel near us and told them about the problem and the guy there said he would look at it while we were doing the tour.  I raced back to our meeting place to find our small group waiting, but in no hurry to head off.  The rest of the group was just two young Austrian 'madchens' and an older American guy and after us all chatting in the sun for fifteen minutes or more, we set off to our first tasting a couple of hundred metres away.  Our guide took us on a slightly circuitous route and pointed out a few more interesting features and historical perspectives along the way.

We started with a tasty soup in a hollowed-out bread bun, with some delicious potato pancakes to follow.  We sat and chatted over a drink or two before walking to a very pretty little restaurant in a narrow alley.  Our guide had plenty more interesting comments about things we passed (or detoured to pass) - he was very knowledgeable and had fascinating stories to tell every few steps.   We had four different types of pierogis at this restaurant and lots more chat.   The American guy was a lot of fun and had his own stories to tell, including some about Polish history because he has a PhD in European History (I think).   Our final stop was at a restaurant just under our window - and that was to sample a couple of local vodkas, very delicious they were too!

The tour and the food was all very traditional, especially the second stop in the alleyway. It was in an old house or apartment with tires of flowpots and bright flowers all around the door and beautifully-worked wall hangings and more flowers inside. This is apparently the way many Polish families arrange and decorate their homes and it quite delighted me. The whole effect was very homely and comfortable, even if the pierogis aren't our most favourite food.

We broke up the party about 9pm because we still had to do a few things ready for the next morning and we thought we may still be locked out of our room.  Fortunately, we weren’t!  The guy from the hostel up the road must have sorted it out and we were able to get in without difficulty and ready ourselves for tomorrow’s trek.   (I looked out the window an hour later and noted that our fellow foodies were still sitting at the restaurant.)

[2004videovixxxen]

man oh man.... 

do i fall back on my word, to myself? like i read back on these posts sometimes and i use words like “never”, “hate”, “always”, “i don’t deserve” and as life continues to go on i see that i am operating off emotion alone. yes my mind adds plenty of overthought thoughts to everything i feel but i have to know and believe that with the bad comes the good, the light with the dark, something i talk about to myself. we as souls have a shadow side and it doesn’t make us bad people for harboring such qualities, we learn how to properly exert those parts of us. 

someone recently asked me “what are your red flags?” and the only thing i said was that when conflict arises i sometimes fall silent and don’t know how to deal with it by talking it through instead of allowing it to eat me alive. then i went home and when i woke up the next day, i thought more about my red flags. why did brandon end our relationship? and so i made a list and later that day i saw this person and after exchanging hellos and hugs, he brought up his own red flags and i laughed because it was the first thing i wanted to talk about. i told him that i’m very hard on myself because i’ve been living my life for others and wanting to please them, make sure i fit into the bubble they’ve created of me and therefore, i didn’t really learn to trust myself and be happy with the person i am regardless of whomever accepts me, even if it’s the people i thought “loved” me. he told me that based off of our conversation the night before that he could tell and then he embraced me, and in that moment i felt seen. i was exposed, but this person wanted to throw a blanket over me and make sure i knew that i’m safe.

i told him that i just got out of a relationship and i’m nowhere near ready to jump into another one. i just saw brandon the other day. we spent the day together and it felt... different. i can feel my lack of access to him, how he speaks is different, his walls are back up. even during sex, i could feel the lack of connection, that was the first time i’ve felt it and this might have been the 4th or 5th time it happened. when we were friends and started having sex it didn’t feel like this, there was a spark, something that just made it feel like the best shit i’ve ever had. and it still is since i haven’t had sex with anyone else, but do i want to keep doing this with him? i don’t know. maybe if there’s alcohol involved, lol. i also heard us joking a little and that was cool. i can appreciate that. i still want to be friends, but i can feel us drifting apart. i went to see him at a show he did the day after we hung out and it was kind of surreal because all of his friends/roommates came over to say hello, i honestly hadn’t seen anyone but i also wasn’t looking for them either, but what stood out to me is that they were more receptive to say hello and talk with me for a few more than brandon was, it was like he saw a ghost and then he walked away. that also has been weighing on the thought of not wanting to have sex because i don’t want to feel used by him. but i don’t plan on having a conversation about it anytime soon. i pray he’s doing well. he looks good, man. i recorded him at the show and i wondered if i should just delete it because why do i need to have that? but that was my petty thinking, if anything it’ll stay in my hidden photos with the rest of everything from our relationship.. damn, haven’t looked at those in a minute.

so my friend tells me, after i told him i’m not ready for this, about something really vulnerable, something that happened to where he doesn’t just date for fun or anything and that he respects where i’m coming from and i was looking in his eyes as he was telling me his story. i was feeling a lot of things in that moment but my main takeaway was this raw emotion i was getting from someone i literally only reconnected with that day after 20 years... i was also happy that he felt safe with me to share. and then i thought.. this is someone i want to get to know. and so we kissed, and we fucking kissed, his lips felt so good on mine, me in his arms.

maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan. i have a crush. he let me take some books from his collection to read while he’s away, that was the g’d damn cherry on top. 

and i wasn’t expecting to feel this way at all, anytime soon. but i’m not going to ignore it because of the idea that brandon might want me back. that if i become the woman he wanted me to be he’ll see that i’m serious about him. i have missed out on a few good men waiting on brandon to finally make me his woman, and we had a great relationship, but we couldn’t make it over the mountain and i can’t keep waiting for him to come find me before it’s too late. if i love myself then i know that i deserve someone who is going to climb the mountain with me no matter what we go through. he deserves the same. i could have been that person man, i was sooooo down for him!!! but not in the way that he wanted which i respect. anyways, really just wanted to talk on the fact that i have a crush on someone and i didn’t think that was going to be possible. life is funny and i appreciate it so much. thank you.

#777 #7723 #boys #maybe i should start tagging men #crushes #love #words

[seabreeze2022]

Bahama Cruise 2022, Part 19, April 20-24, Turning around and heading back.

This is a view from the top of the Monument. Cruisers go down on the grey area at the center of the photo. And spell out the name of their boat with rocks, in large enough letters to be seen from the Monument.

Winds finally laid down after a week, so we dinghied south to Sand Dollar Beach. Hiked across the island at two different places to check out the beaches there. Continuing down the inside, where we came to a huge sand flat that was only calf deep.

Nancy found another King Helmet shell. It is my theory the shell takes on black streaks and a browner look because of what they eat. Namely, sand dollars, which are black. Only the sand dollar exoskeleton is white.

After exploring the beach we snorkeled a small reef on the way back. Visibility was not great, but as a shallow as it was, it was ok. Nice sea whips (purple thing) and sponges.

I found a very unusual item. It was a very bright white. Clean without any sediment or growth on it. Looked like some kind of manmade flexible rubber tubing. The internet solved the question of what it was. It is the egg sack of the West Indian Shank Shell. Fairly unusual to find one.

As Nancy was boarding her paddleboard and heading off to yoga class. She said, “There is something on the bottom, below our boat”. Turns out it was a huge beach umbrella. Gave me something to do while she was in class, I dove down, collapsed it then tied a line around it. It would have been a nightmare if someone dropped their anchor on top of it and thought they were securely anchored. Renaldo, of the conch shack, was on shore so I took it to him. Figured he good get some more good will by returning it to Peace N Plenty.

Renaldo is in his 20’s and runs the conch shack. Hard working, always with a smile. I saw him working on his 20 ft skiff, so I went and checked on him. He was getting his boat ready to make a 30 mile run across open water to collect conch. His dad and a friend would go with him. They would camp on the beach for two nights and return with several hundred conch.

His boat was duct taped and held together by bailing wire. He was trying to put on a new steering wheel and did not have much in the way of tools. So I returned with tools and helped him get the steering wheel bolted on. When they left the next day, they would have multiple plastic containers full of gasoline on deck. It would be a barely floating disaster waiting to happen. They came by in the morning and thanked us again.

Departed Georgetown and started our journey back to the States.

We came in the cut on the east side of Rat Cut Cay, circling Rat Cut Cay clockwise. The timing coming in the cut worked out. Always trying to avoid “The Rage”. From here we motored up the bank side of Children's Bay Cay.

This is a unique rock sitting by itself. You can tell by the under cut that it is low tide. In the back ground there is a grove of coconuts planted years ago. Later we would come explore this beach and collect a couple of coconuts for bread.

After anchoring off of Williams Island Nancy made her signature rum drink, a “Pain Killer”.

This is one of the top two places we enjoy anchoring. Three beaches nearby, good holding with usually only one other boat within sight. The strange thing is, this is one island with two names. Right where we anchor is the skinniest part of the island and still a hundred yards across. The south part of the whole island is named Williams Island. The north part is Lee Stocking Island.

Sunset at Lee Stocking Island with one boat in sight.

The next day we hiked to the tallest part of the island.

Looking west, we spotted this Tug towing a barge southbound. Just an optical illusion. These are two rocks named “Tug and Barge Rocks”. Even more life like from sea level.

Folks clean their conch on the beach and leave the shells piled up. Looks like some cruiser had an artistic itch to scratch.

We collected a coconut at Children’s Bay Cay and a beautiful conch shell. Good eats!

A work boat running by. Probably heading to Barretarre, Great Exuma; the largest nearby settlement. These boats have loading ramps on the bow to resupply the different isolated mansions on the private islands.

Tug and Barge rocks from sea level. Nancy looking good on the bow checking the anchor.

Norman’s Pond Cay was 2 miles away with a large salt pond in the middle, (see the blow ip on the right). I noticed on Goggle earth a unique item to the west of the salt pond that I wanted to check out. This is pretty shallow and few cruisers come here.

Oops maxed out the photos for this blog, go check out Part 20 to see what we found.

S/V Sea Breeze, Lee Stocking Island, Exuma, Bahamas.

#SeaBreeze2022 #conch shell #exuma #exumabahamas