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transmascissues · 5 months

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some thoughts about top surgery recovery, as of 3 days post-op:

when they say using your chest muscles sucks afterward, i never realized exactly how much was going to be be limited. coughing, sneezing, hiccuping, laughing — all of it is terrifying right now. even talking for too long starts to put that kind of stress on my chest, and my voice isn’t as strong as it usually is. it takes me forever to fully empty my bladder when i’m on the toilet because i’m totally relying on gravity to do all the work (and shitting was effectively impossible without a stool softener even though i haven’t taken the pain meds they said i would need them for)…and don’t even get me started on figuring out how to wipe (hint: back to front while sitting, using my dominant hand to push my non-dominant hand far back enough). using the computer is also harder — i was planning on playing lots of baldur’s gate after, but for the first couple days i could only really go for a few minutes before using my arms that way got too tiring. having a mastectomy pillow has been an absolute godsend when i’m using my phone because i can prop my arms up on it and not really have to use any muscles at all to hold them up.

the biggest piece of not being able to use my chest muscles right now, which i’m writing separately because it’s been such a huge thing for me, is that i cannot sit up or back by myself at fucking all. like, if i sit on the couch and lean back a bit to sit against the cushion, it hurts to pull myself back up to fully straight — and if i’m leaning back any more than that, i just can’t do it at all and i’m stuck there unless my boyfriend puts their hands behind me and pushes my dead weight back up. i totally get why some people sleep in a recliner now because i’m completely at the mercy of having someone there to help move me around once i’m at any sort of angle. sitting back is mostly the same as far as what i can do, and arguably hurts worse to attempt at all, but my ability to do it seems to be coming back faster than my ability to sit up. if you’ve never had your mobility limited to that extent before, prepare yourself: the first time you’re stuck somewhere and the person who normally helps you doesn’t answer immediately can be really fucking scary (i learned that the hard way).

the anesthesiologist warned me that i might have a sore throat after surgery from being intubated, but i was not prepared for what “sore throat” ended up meaning for me. you know that feeling of swallowing something that’s too big and you can still feel it in your throat even after it’s down? it’s like that times 20, and further down in my throat. the worst pain i’ve felt in the last three days wasn’t from the surgery itself, it was from trying to swallow pancakes when my throat was at it’s worst. today is the first day it’s even started to fade, and even now, it hurts just to swallow my own spit. i don’t know about you, but that’s not what comes to mind when someone tells me “you might have a sore throat”.

on that note, the incisions themselves have really been the least painful part in general, probably because the nerves there aren’t reconnected yet. the vast majority of my pain and discomfort at this point has been from the drains and bandages — the drain sites getting sore or just randomly starting to sting, waking up feeling suffocated by the ace bandages, etc. it’s not because anything is wrong with them — the drains weren’t placed wrong and the bandages aren’t too tight, they’re just a huge pain in the ass to deal with 24/7. i can’t express how much i’m looking forward to getting the drains out and being able to take binder breaks because it’ll make things so much more comfortable.

my incisions are connected in the middle because my chest tissue was all really close together, and the part where the incisions connect is really the only part where i’ve felt any pain so far. i suspect it’s because the swelling on either side is making that part of the incision push together and press against itself, and then the binder pushes on it even more. it’s not a severe pain at all, but i do sometimes lift the center of the bandage off my chest for a second to give that spot a bit of a break.

i’ve already started getting some of the weird sensations associated with nerves reconnecting, and it definitely is wild. so far, it’s been mostly tingly feelings, sometimes like chills and sometimes more like a limb falling asleep. (weird observation: taking a shit makes my ribs tingle? i’ve got no good explanation for that one.) i’ve gotten a zap on one side and some buzzing feelings too. it’s pretty mild right now, probably because it’s so early on.

i’ve also gotten what i would describe as phantom boob feelings, especially on the first night. specifically, when i close my eyes, sometimes i’ll feel like someone is touching or jiggling the boobs i don’t have anymore. definitely not a super pleasant experience, but i think being out of it from the anesthesia still really helped me not be too upset by the worst of it. i’ve gotten a couple little phantom nipple touches too, but those were just split second blips of sensation that were far less bothersome in comparison.

i never realized that the classic post-op hunch is caused more by the binder than by the body itself, but we had to take all of my bandages off the night after my surgery to send pictures of something to my surgeon, and i was shocked by how much straighter i could sit with everything off. i was definitely still hunched, but it was more like a natural slouch and less like i looked like i was using an invisible walker. with the binder on, it’s super uncomfortable for me to try to stand straight at all because it feels like the ace bandage doesn’t come with my body and just drags everything down, and i’m always holding my mastectomy pillow or my hands to my chest while i walk around to stop it from feeling like gravity is going make the bandage tear my chest open.

every so often, when things are getting especially painful or uncomfortable or just generally difficult, i do start to wonder if i made the right choice. not because i regret getting rid of those things — not by a long shot — but because it’s a fucking hard process to go through. this is probably the hardest thing for me to admit, but the rational part of my mind knows it’s natural to feel that way once in a while. all of this is temporary and the relief from dysphoria will be permanent, but right now? this is my entire world and it doesn’t feel particularly temporary and i do have moments of “why do i have to go through all this when other people get to just have the right body from the start? why couldn’t i just live with what i had? why can’t i just be living my normal life right now?” no matter how sure you are of your choice, no matter how proud you are of being trans, this shit is hard and it’s okay to feel that.

i’m going to put the pictures of my chest one day post-op under the cut, because i think it’s pretty rare to see pictures from that soon after the surgery. they’re not gorey at all — the actual incisions are totally covered by steri strips and everything around them is clean — but still, if you don’t want to see relatively fresh surgery results, don’t look under the cut.

for all the discomfort and pain and limitations and other weirdness of recovery, every time i look at these pictures it reminds me of exactly why i’m doing all of this, and i’m so glad i kept fighting for this for so long. some people might never understand why someone would choose to go through this whole process, but i know it’ll be worth it in the end.

here’s my chest one day post-op! i think it looks super good and my surgeon said it looks like it’s healing perfectly (as much as it can be healing at one day). for reference, my chest was a DDD/F before surgery. i know this isn’t how my chest will look in the end, but i’m already thrilled with how things are turning out! i’ve truly never been more confident in my choice of surgeon — like, come on! look at that! she did so good!

#top surgery adventures #<- gonna start putting all the posts about my top surgery in that tag #top surgery #trans man #transmasc

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narafeedee · 10 months

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Do you think you could talk more about what happened during those five weeks where you gained 50 lbs? I can only imagine that it was a mixture of amazing and annoying to grow so rapidly, but I'd love to hear your thoughts on it!!

sure!

before i start i have to preface with some warnings; this gets pretty detailed and graphic regarding some of the health issues i had at the time. do not read if you are not okay with that please.

i was in a weird spot at the time; my husband had left me a couple months before all of this and i was exploring myself and who i was now that my marriage was over. a large contributing factor to that separation was feedism; my sexual needs just were not met with someone who wasn’t into it.

it started early in the week of Thanksgiving, Tuesday 11/20/18. i met a feeder online four years prior who had gotten me from just above 200lbs to 300lbs slowly but steadily. to this day the best feeder i’ve ever met, sincerely considerate and never once crossed any boundaries.

he came to me with a proposition the weekend prior; gain from 300lb to 350lb by the end of the year and i will fund it.

say less.

that Tuesday was the first time i ever video called with another feedist; it wasn’t the feeder that proposed and funded this challenge, instead it was a guy that pushed me to eat until i threw it all back up because he’s really into emetophilia, i didn’t really know the limits of my stomach so i let him.

however, that evening launched me into the most insane five weeks of my life.

when i woke up Wednesday morning i was somehow starving; despite not keeping anything down the night prior my stomach had still stretched out considerably. that on top of how insanely horny i was at the thought of packing on 50lbs by new years i spent the entire day shoveling in as much food as humanly possible. i didn’t count calories that day, just pushed myself to the absolute limit.

when i woke up Thursday i was impossibly hungry and ready to do it all again. i did the same thing as before, just as much food as humanly possible all day; i distinctly remember dinner being a large pizza, garlic knots, specialty chicken, lava cakes, and a 2 liter of soda from Domino’s.

when i woke up Friday i had a goal; 10,000 calories a day until the ball drops.

and that is exactly what i did.

every morning i would wake up and drink a pint of heavy cream for an easy 1600 calories to start the day right. i would swing by McDonald’s on my way to work and get two McGriddles and a large iced coffee. i’d get to work and have a blender bottle on my desk also full of heavy cream and sometimes condensed milk, i would either drink straight from it or add it to cups of coffee from the break room.

at lunch i would always order with my coworkers to have something delivered… but i would also leave on my lunch break and go back to McDonald’s for 4 McChickens and a large diet coke. then come back to the office and eat the lunch i had ordered with my coworkers.

after work i would swing through another drive thru, often McDonald’s once again. I’d get a couple sandwiches but nothing crazy, just a light snack to hold me over til dinner.

i would order massive feasts for delivery from Domino’s or I’d go back out after dark and order enough food for a family of 4. you guessed it, usually from McDonald’s.

to finish my night, i would drink another pint of heavy cream. totaling 3200 calories of straight fat every single day.

the weight piled on rapidly; new stretchmarks were appearing daily.

this is where i should put a disclaimer. this is all 100% true, every single detail is lived experience. i know it sounds insane. it was. i have literal scars to prove it. one feedist saw me do it live and in person, in the flesh, i believe he follows me on here so if you’re reading this G, please corroborate.

i gained 10lbs a week through the end of the year. i was cumming harder than i ever had before. my entire life was consumed by food and gaining.

i did not have a bed to sleep in at the time; there were some other issues i was dealing with that made it so i had to sleep in a recliner in my living room.

because i was gaining so rapidly and sleeping with my legs below my heart, i developed extremely bad edema. my legs were so swollen they started to weep a clear liquid; i would put on a pair of leggings and they would be soaked from the knee down before i even left the house. my shoes were soaked. i developed ulcers on my shins that just would not heal, the skin almost looked necrotic but they would just weep all day every day with no relief and stick to anything i tried to wear.

mid-December i was bursting out of my clothes. most of the weight i gained went straight to my belly. i went on a little shopping spree at Torrid and had to buy all 5’s and 6’s for the first time.

my mobility suffered at this point as well. i couldn’t do much of anything without getting red-faced and winded within a minute of moving. i had a step tracker at the time and was only walking about 200 steps a day, literally the bare minimum for me to go to work and come home.

i had no time for my body to adjust to the weight so i developed a heavy waddle. my back absolutely killed me.

i swear some days i woke up actually feeling fatter and looking fatter. it was the absolute hottest thing i have ever done and probably ever will do. i started at about 303lbs and landed at 357lb on New Year’s day. my gains didn’t actually slow down til i was in the mid 360s despite my efforts to pump the brakes.

would i do it again? absolutely not. i was in excruciating pain and the ulcers on my legs did not stop for an entire year (after i gained another 50lbs in an 8 week period but we ain’t talking about that [even tho i still have all the content i made from that gain lol])

but if i went back in time i would not change a thing except better leg elevation and compression. i do not regret it for a second; it’s what shaped me as a feedist and i’m grateful i was able to do it, i don’t have pics from when it was really bad but the scars i have today are still evident.

so yeah! that’s the story! sorry it’s super rambling, i sincerely hope it was coherent, now i gotta go clean my toys so i can take care of myself cause lord 🥵 thems some intense memories, my only regret is i deleted 99% of the pics and videos i took at that time.

here’s a couple more pics; one is my cart at the grocery in early December, the other is a screenshot of the weight gain calculator i used from the same week when i realized i didn’t have to eat 10k a day, i could make it happen with 7k a day but the former sounded much better (read: hotter) to me

#narafeedee #naraanswers #i think this is the most detail i’ve ever told anyone lol #fucks sake i am wet

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estrellami-1 · 11 months

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(Push Away the) Lonely Times

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Thanks to @artiststarme for the title inspiration!! ❤️

It’s at the tail end of a fourteen-hour shift, because retail is one of the circles of hell, that Jim sees him.

He’s seen him around before, with friends, jumping around and playing pretend and buying a candy bar with a stray few coins.

Now, though, he’s alone. Pushing a cart that’s almost taller than he is through the aisles. He seems ages away from where he was, even just last summer, with his friends.

Jim watches, because despite his exterior, he has a heart. He watches as the kid—because that’s what he is, at ten years old—does the chores Jim thinks the mother should be doing.

Not that women should be the only ones doing grocery shopping. His mother would scalp him for the thought. But because honest-to-God kids shouldn’t be doing this kind of thing.

He watches as the kid consults a list, looks between two or three different items, counts on his fingers, then finally shrugs and picks one of them.

He finally comes up to the register, cart about halfway full, and Jim knows this kid, knows his parents, knows there’s something wrong.

“Yer ma didn’ wanna come in?”

“Ah, no, sir,” Steven Harrington says, then hesitates strangely. “She’s busy.”

Busy is one word for it, Jim privately thinks, but nods. “Put yer thin’s on the belt, kid, I gotta scan ‘em.”

Steven does so, scarily efficiently, knows to keep the eggs and bread separate from everything else. Jim thinks about the scarce ingredients he sees in the cart, the myriad frozen dinners. Is privately thankful that the kid isn’t going to be cooking every night.

Jim scans the items, limiting himself to three glances at Steven as he does so. Nods to the shelf by the register. “Go ‘head ‘n pick a candy bar.”

“Oh,” Steven says, eyes wide. “I- I don’t have the money for that-”

Jim winks at him. Is pleased to see a small answering smile. “I won’t tell,” he says, and Steven shows more energy in his little hop over to the shelf than he had all day so far.

He grabs a Snickers, and Jim thinks back to last summer, thinks he remembers Steven grabbing the same one back then. Nods to himself.

“Right,” he says, and tells Steven the total.

Steven pulls out some bills, counts them out, and part of Jim wants to tell him to keep all his money.

He doesn’t. But he does distract Steven, convince him he’d overpaid by twenty dollars. Slips his own bill into the till when the kid walks out.

Jim watches as he loads his groceries onto his bike and pedals away.

He takes his break, goes into the back room, and calls Jim Hopper.

“Jim,” he says, because he thinks he’s hilarious, even though he knows he goes by Hopper.

Hopper grunts. “Jim.”

“Do me a favor? The Harrington kid, Steven. Think he’s alone.”

Hopper’s smart. He knows how to read between the lines. He sighs, long and drawn-out. “Guess I’m taking my uniform off.”

Jim laughs, but says, “Thanks, Hop. R’min’ me t’buy you a coffee.”

“You know I will,” Hopper says, which they both know is a lie. Jim owes Hopper at least two full pots by now.

He gets off the phone, looks at the clock, and sighs. Back to work.

He thinks about Steven the entire time.

Permanent Taglist: @justforthedead89 @ilovecupcakesandtea @madigoround @bookbinderbitch @suddenlyinlove @nburkhardt @artiststarme

#stranger things #steve harrington #jim hopper #oc #Jim is a DELIGHT okay #he thinks he’s the funniest #and he privately is #he just says the worst jokes out loud #because he loves the groans he gets #it’s anyone’s guess as to which Jim adopts Steve but rest assured it does happen #starambles

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devildom-moss · 5 months

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I came running when I saw requests open. I know that this is a total long shot, so ignore it if it’s too much or too long of an ask:

Can I request HCs for the brothers and extras (maybe separate posts?) for celebrating the holidays with their s/o? Can be all x reader or each individual x reader, whatever you’d like. No limits on imagination or creativity. Bonus points for holiday party gifts giving and receiving for them, too! Love your content!

Okay, so I was going to try to knock them all out in one post but then things occurred, and +4k words (and a lot of time) later, I realized nope I better not. But since some of the holidays have already started, I thought I should try to get something up soon. So I'm starting with a few general headcanons and the demon brothers. I'll try to get the others up soon, though.

Celebrating the holidays/New Year headcanons (general + the demon brothers)

(Suggestive)

Word Count: +4,800

General headcanons

They would all agree to throw a party together – in part because most of them love their little friends and family parties, especially during holidays. They’re also too stubborn and affectionate to give you up for a holiday, so a big party is a decent compromise. (Because if Solomon steals you for the holidays, the brothers will throw a fit and sulk, Luke will be sad, and Lucifer, Simeon, and Diavolo will – separately – find ways to interrupt. If the brothers keep you to themselves, the others will find a way to intrude. Diavolo would have better luck convincing Barbatos to bake him a rat-shaped cake than prying you from Lucifer’s grasp on a holiday. Thirteen could hide you in her cave for a while, but Solomon and Barbatos could probably find you before the day was over.)

Thirteen and Mephisto are the most likely to either not get invited (rude) or just not show up to a big party. Then again, Thirteen is so smitten by you that she’d probably invite herself just to see you. I’ll put a bit more on that in their respective sections.

If you celebrate a particular holiday, they’ll try to celebrate that with you. If not, they might celebrate a secular Christmas or just throw a New Year / New Year’s Eve party.

A lot of effort goes into the big party, especially if you have specific customs that you celebrated in the human world. They will probably ask about it a month in advance (right after October, usually) so they can start scheming planning.

Satan, Belphie, and Solomon are usually in charge of research on customs and traditions – not that Solomon needs to do much research.

By the time they get you involved, they would already have some ideas in mind. Unless you seem to love planning parties, they want to do most of the work. You deal with their shit all year; they want to put in most of the effort as the year comes to an end and give you the chance to rest.

Lucifer

Considers it his job to make sure no matter what happens, the holidays aren’t too stressful for you (yelling at everyone and reigning in their stupidity to the best of his abilities). If he so much as senses your stress levels increase, someone is getting strung up, and you’re getting a few hours of spoiling until you feel better.

He wants alone time with you, so if he can manage it, he’ll sneak in a date with you before and after the holidays. It might be something small like eating a meal alone or taking a walk and admiring the way the Devildom settles into winter.

Lucifer wants to be the last person you go on a date with this year and the first person you date next year. He knows it’s selfish, but if you get a bit of Demonus in him, he’ll admit to his selfish desire, face flushed pink and eyes soft with adoration the whole time.

Definitely tries to get you alone during the party for a few minutes. There’s about a 40% chance he ends up drunk before the party is over. If he’s sober and conscious after everyone but Diavolo and Barbatos falls asleep, he’ll try to put the moves on you. (Those two can watch or join or try to compete; he doesn’t care. Although, if he’s tipsy enough, he’ll flirt with you and kiss you in front of Solomon and Mephisto, too.)

If it’s a New Year’s Eve party, he will drag you somewhere secluded before midnight to steal your kiss. Similar to the date thing, he wants to be your first and last kiss of the year.

Gifts – giving: Lucifer always gets you alone before giving you gifts. He likes to give practical gifts for holidays that make you think of him often, but they’re usually high-end and tailored to your interests. If you like studying or journaling or drawing, he’d give you an extravagant hand-bound notebook or enchanted pens or pencils. He might also give you some kind of jewelry – usually something that could be worn on your wrists (not at all because he feels like he’s binding you to him by doing that. No. Never.). But he’s so extra about it. He’d insist upon putting it on for you right then and there. He’d kiss your wrist before he did. And his annoying ass would definitely get you a watch and then look up at you flirtatiously to say, “Now you have no excuse to keep me waiting, my dear.”

Gifts – receiving: He’s such a pain to shop for because if you ask him what he wants, he’ll just tell you, “I want you – all to myself.” Sir, shut the fuck up. However, he loves anything you give him, so it works out. If you can get him a rare cursed record or bottle of Demonus, he’ll be overjoyed, especially if you enjoy them with him. He also appreciates special coffee beans/grounds, clothing/accessories (especially matching ones so he can show off), and anything you made by hand. As long as he can tell that you thought about him, he’ll be pleased (probably so pleased that he’ll have to resist the temptation to pounce on you right then and there).

Mammon

He will be glued to your side whenever possible. Mammon gets so excited about the holidays and the party that he’s all smiles – or maybe that��s just because he’s next to you. He considers it his job to keep you happy and bring you cheer.

Ropes you into decorating the House of Lamentation with him. Definitely helps you reach the higher locations by changing into his demon form and holding you while you decorate. “Couldn’t you just fly up here and do this yourself?” “Shuddup. I don’t wanna do it. You’re better at puttin’ this stuff up. And maybe I just wanna hold ya, so there. Now keep goin’ or the Great Mammon’s gonna drop ya.” “You wouldn’t dare!” “Yeah, yeah. I know. Just shuddup and stop teasin’ me.”

He tells you that he needs your help doing some holiday shopping, and that the deals at the end of the year are too good to miss. It’s an excuse to take you on a date, but it’s also a good way for him to keep an eye on you and see if anything sparks your interest while you’re out shopping together. He’ll go back and buy it for you later when you’re not paying attention.

Gets drunk at the party – mostly because Diavolo and Mephisto brought the good Demonus, so he can’t possibly pass it up. He’ll keep a close eye on you during the whole party (for as long as he’s sober enough).

Definitely tries to make out with you in some quiet room where no one will find you for a few minutes. You’ll probably get caught, and Mammon will get yelled at and called scum.

Stays up pretty late because he just wants to be around you, but between the Demonus and all the dancing he ropes you into, he’ll be exhausted and sleep until noon.

Gifts – giving: Gives you something stylish you can wear (that just so happens to match with something he bought for himself). He’s especially fond of giving you necklaces, jackets, or glasses – something that isn’t as easy to hide. He wants you to wear it with pride. If he gets you any kind of jewelry, he’ll get it engraved with something sickeningly sweet. “my most precious treasure” / “you shine brighter than gold” / “your smile is priceless.” Mammon also makes it a point to give you gifts alone because he’s embarrassed – and because he wants a kiss as a thank you.

Gifts – receiving: He makes a big fuss about wanting the newest products from high-end fashion brands or just cold, hard Grimm, and that’s true, he does want those things, but he’s also incredibly soft for you. As long as you give him something thoughtful, he’ll be fine if it isn’t expensive. He loves getting accessories that he can wear around his neck or wrists (yes, for the reason you’re thinking. It makes him feel like he belongs to you – which obviously means you belong to him, too.) Additionally, as long as you give him his gift in private, Mammon will be extremely pleased if you give him kinky items (collars, cuffs, and any sex toys that you promise to use on him). He likes being reminded that you think about him in that way.

Leviathan

He tries to get you to binge watch holiday specials for his favorite anime with him more than once. He’ll even try to entice you with a sleepover including all your favorite snacks and seasonal drinks. Spending time with you makes him feel better about being an otaku during the holiday season. When he isn’t around you or the others during the party prep stages, he feels anxious and mopey.

If you ask him out on a date around the holidays, he will freak out and turn a bright shade of pink, fanning his cheeks with his hands (dual purpose stimming). Take him somewhere nice and romantic, hold his hand, maybe even kiss his cheek in public, and he will melt quicker than snow next to a fire.

He probably drinks the most if no one regulates him because he’s anxious about having to be social all day and whether or not you’re having fun or if you’re going to like the gift he got for you. He still enjoys himself, though. He’ll rope a few people (at least Luke and Diavolo) into singing karaoke with him, and he’ll get a few more to play games with him.

Retires relatively early because all the socializing drained him. There’s a good chance he calls it a night and forgets to exchange gifts with you. He freaks out when he wakes up and apologizes profusely after he hunts you down finds you and finally hands you your gift.

Gifts – giving: He finds it so much easier to get gifts for someone who loves anime and manga. Nonetheless, he’ll probably try to track down something related to a show, book, game, or idol you like (any media interests, basically). He’ll get you a signed first edition print of a book you love, a commissioned art piece from one of your favorite artists (possibly of you and him), a high-quality, custom-made figure of your fav character wearing that outfit you love, or VIP tickets to a concert for that musician you like – usually one of a kind or hard to obtain items.

Gifts – receiving: He’d be delighted with the same types of gifts that he would try to get for you – but for his favorites. If you have any artistic/musical talents, he’d also be overjoyed with fan art made by you or covers sung by you. If you can voice act and you record an audio as one of his favorites, he will emotionally implode (especially if it’s suggestive or NSFW). Levi would also be happy with fabric he can use to make cosplay or outfit pieces he can use in cosplay. Like Mammon, he’d also be delighted to get kinky stuff from you (but he’d prefer stuff like lingerie, collars, and harnesses). He’ll turn bright red if you do that, but the embarrassment is kind of a turn on for him.

Satan

He will ask you out on a (cat) café date at some point near the end of the year. He understands it’s a busy time for you, so he’ll only ask you to spare one day where he can enjoy a few seasonal menu items (like peppermint hot chocolate with cute peppermint mocha whipped cream in the shape of a cat), take a stroll in the brisk winter air while holding hands, and curl up in his room reading a good book with you (and yes, that includes cuddling and maybe a little make out session). As long as he gets his one date, he’ll be content.

He finds holidays stressful, and decorating with all of his brothers gets incredibly annoying (loud, overstimulating), so if he can do something where he only has to deal with one or two people (or even better, just you), he’ll try to help that way instead. Satan is pretty good at delegating, organizing the tasks, and tracking the budget, though.

Satan looks forward to the party in part because he, Belphie, and Mephisto have a bunch of tricks planned for Lucifer. Will any of them be successful and effectively annoying? Probably not. But there’s a chance that Lucifer might slip up and get embarrassed by one of them, and that’s good enough. Satan will get annoyed if Lucifer doesn’t fall for any of them, so Lucifer might just let it happen. If not, you’ll have to bring him a drink and cheer him up.

He cherishes the chance to dance with you during the party, but he’s even more pleased when he inevitably sneaks off somewhere quiet with you. He makes sure you don’t get caught, though, and he returns you to the party within a half an hour in almost the same state you left in.

Absolutely wants to be your first kiss of the new year and has the common sense to ask you to save your first kiss for him beforehand.

Gifts – giving: Satan is the type to have most of his gifts ready in advance. He cannot deal with the stress of trying to find multiple last-minute gifts without demolishing a wall. Moreover, he thinks about others (especially you) more than he wants to admit, so if he sees something you’ll like he just gets it. He could hide 3 dead bodies in his mess of books if not for the smell; he’d have no trouble hiding presents. Besides, no one is going to try to snoop around in his room. He likes to give you books that suit your interests because he feels like he’s also sharing part of himself with you when he does. They’re usually rare editions or custom hand-bound versions. He can find you an amazing book on anything you have an interest in. Satan might also pull some strings and get you something more exclusive – products that haven’t hit the market yet that you seemed interested in or two tickets/vouchers for a novel experience. The vouchers would probably be for something that could serve as a date later like a traveling exhibit or a movie screening. Whatever it is, though, he’d make sure it’s something he thinks you’d enjoy. If it’s a book or product, he’ll have no problem giving your gift to you in front of others, but if it’s tickets/vouchers, he’ll give it to you in secret. He doesn’t want anyone trying to tag along or make a fuss over it.

Gifts – receiving: You can never have too many books. Giving him obscure or rare books (especially human world books that he never would have known about) is a great idea. He’ll be so thrilled that he’ll offer to read the book to you. Cat-themed gifts are also an option: matching cat-shaped accessories, a photo album of all the cats he’s spotted in the Devildom, reservations to a cat café, etc. He’s really easy to please. Honestly, you could put on cat ears/a cat onesie or use magic to turn yourself into a cat for a day and let him cuddle you, and he’d be the happiest demon in the Devildom.

Asmodeus

As much as he hates how much the winter air dries out his skin, he’s a bundle of cheer during the holidays. The decorations, the snow, seasonal food and drinks, adorable cozy outfits – it’s so Devilgramable. He feels like it’s his job to make you happy as the year comes to an end.

Asmo will be attached to you almost as much as Mammon. For everyone’s sake, please don’t let him find out about the mistletoe tradition. He’ll be carrying one around in a bag all month so he can steal kisses from everyone (no one will be safe) – especially you. Even if you manage to hide that information from him, Asmo will use the cold winter air as an excuse to hold your hand, hug you, and cuddle with you whenever he wants. He’ll probably get yelled at a few times for not keeping his hands to himself (mostly by his brothers, but Simeon and Solomon might suggest he needs to respect your personal space, too).

His desire for attention is about the same, so he doesn’t ask you out any more often than he usually does. Unfortunately (or fortunately), that’s still a lot. Every few days, he’ll ask you to go out with him to try some kind of seasonal drink or food or to shop. “Aw, hun. If you can’t go out, you can at least spare a few minutes to make out and warm me up a little, right? You know you want to kiss me~”

Asmo will happily help decorate – as long as he can avoid more physical tasks. He would definitely have holiday-themed nails, and he’s not about to ruin those. Luckily, he can get away with making design decisions or doing floral arrangements. He’ll pawn the heavy labor off on Beel.

If you let him, he’ll get you all dolled up and do your makeup for the party. “You’ll look so gorgeous, no one will be able to take their eyes off you.”

He’ll be lively during the party, dancing and playing games with you and the others. He might get a bit tipsy, but he’s pretty lucid all night. He’ll still be sober when he’s fawning over Solomon, Barbatos, Thirteen, and Diavolo – mostly the former two. You’re still his number one, but he wants to see if he can convince any of those four to dance with him or give him a kiss for the sake of the holidays.

At a New Year party, if he could find you, he would absolutely kiss you when the clock strikes midnight. He wouldn’t even bother to get you alone.

Gifts – giving: He’ll most likely give you high quality clothes or accessories. They’ll probably be items that he worked on himself or that he modeled. Asmo would take care to ensure that they fit you perfectly and that you’ll be comfortable in whatever he gets you. More likely than not, he would give it to you while he helps you get ready. It would probably be something you could wear to the party. If it’s clothes, he would insist that you model it for him first. “I need to take in your beauty before anyone else can see how amazing you look.” (He would definitely use that as an excuse to praise you and would probably try to get you off before the party started and someone came looking for you). If it’s jewelry, he would insist upon putting it on for you. Asmo would leave kisses on your skin between whispered words of praise. “This suits you perfectly. You’re lovely. I can’t take my eyes off you.” As a half-joke, he might give you kinky gifts and/or sex toys. With a giggle, he would tell you how excited he was to try it out with you. Also as a half-joke (in addition to a tangible present), Asmo would offer himself up to you. He wouldn’t be immediately prepared if you agreed, though. In fact, he’d probably be pleasantly surprised by your boldness.

Gifts – receiving: Asmo gets a lot of gifts from so many fans, so the most important things when considering gifts for him are time, effort, and thought. Handmade or custom gifts are ideal. He just wants to know that you were thinking of him – and only him – the entire time. I feel like he would adore a handmade or custom ordered collar or harness, but he would also love something like a handmade bouquet of paper/fabric flowers if it’s done well or a custom perfume. The other gift that would melt his heart would be your time. Get him spa vouchers and have a spa day with him, plan an entire date and spoil him, or offer to be his maid/butler for a full day (extra points if you dress up for him). More than anything, he wants you.

Beelzebub

Beel gets so excited to try all the limited-time and seasonal foods near the end of the year, and, of course, he’s even more excited to eat them with you. So, surprisingly, he manages to squeeze a lot of dates in around the holidays. He’ll invite you to some café or restaurant – anywhere that sells food and drinks – almost every other day. However, Beel isn’t as selfish with your time, so he doesn’t mind if the others tag along – especially Belphie and Luke. If he really wants you to himself, he’ll invite you when no one else is around and tell you to keep it a secret.

He makes a long list of food and drinks that he wants Luke, Simeon, and Barbatos to make for the party – not that they need it, but they’ll take a look, nonetheless. They use him to taste test all their food. Other than that, he helps decorate, bring in ingredients, and carry things while the others shop. If it involves manual labor, Beel is happy to help. He wants the party to go well so it will make you and his brothers (and the others) happy.

Spends most of the party snacking and playing games. He’ll drink the one glass of Demonus that gets served to him to toast with. Otherwise, he’ll only consume alcohol if it’s put in a particularly delicious looking drink.

Lets you sit on his lap while playing games – even if the others complain about it. As long as you want to, he doesn’t mind. In fact, he’d be delighted if you chose to sit on him when given a multitude of other options (including an actual chair). How adorable would he be just wrapping his arms around your waist and resting his chin on your shoulder?

At some point in the party, when he’s temporarily satiated his hunger, he’ll try to get you alone for a bit. He’ll ask you to take a short walk or just get some air with him. He wants to be somewhere quieter with you. Besides, if you’re outside and it’s cold, that’s a perfect excuse for him to hold your hand or pull you in close. If he’s feeling bold, he might try to kiss you.

Gifts – giving: He (almost) always has food on his mind, so his first instinct is to give you food as a present. Things like seasonal candies and drink mixes are the most likely contenders. Beel would buy multiples of whatever he bought you for himself. That way he won’t be as tempted to eat your present. Additionally, that means he can try the food or drinks with you. He loves the experience of eating with you and seeing your face light up when you try something delicious. Therefore, another present he might offer would be tickets for a restaurant tour or food-based fair. You could go with him and sample amazing food until you’re too full to move – if you want.

Gifts – receiving: Obviously, getting him food is the easiest option, but you should make sure you put some more effort and thought into it. Seasonal and limited-time options are great, but he would appreciate a more personal touch. Instead, if you can cook, you could do something like schedule a date to prepare a homemade full-course meal just for Beel, making whatever food he requested. You could also make him a huge box of assorted sweets – chocolates, cookies, pastries, etc. He’d appreciate how much time you spent. If you tell him that you thought of him the whole time, he would melt on the spot. Beel would also be happy to get tickets for food tours or fairs – as long as you, and maybe Belphie, can go with him. Outside of food-related gifts, Beel isn’t opposed to getting clothes from you, especially if you buy something that matches with an item you own. You could get him jewelry, so long as it’ll be okay coming in contact with heat and sweat. Since you gave it to him, he’s going to want to wear it often – including during his workouts. He’d prefer necklaces; it feels like he’s keeping you close to his heart that way.

Belphegor

Other than looking into human world traditions, he’s pretty useless in the party planning stages. He tends to fall asleep when he’s instructed to clean or decorate, so he doesn’t get much done. Although, I guess if you count setting up pranks on Lucifer as “helping out,” he’s a bit more useful.

He takes advantage of the cold weather as an excuse to cuddle and nap with you. “It’s too cold to sleep alone. You have to sleep with me, or I won’t rest as well.” He makes it a habit of trying to sleep with you as often as possible. Aside: he strikes me as one of those people with cold hands, and as winter approaches, he’ll use that to tease you. Belphie will slip his hands under your clothes or between your thighs to warm them up, and when you look at him, he’ll feign innocence. What a little shit.

If the planetarium or botanical gardens have a special exhibit, he’d ask you to go on a date there, but he’s not picky about whether it happens before or after the holidays – just promise to spend time alone with him.

He’s not that enthusiastic about the party, but if you seem excited, he’ll take some interest in it. He’ll stay awake long enough to dance with you, play a few games, and see if any of the pranks they set up for Lucifer succeed.

Drags you somewhere secluded during the party, claiming that he wants to take a nap and that you should help him fall asleep, but he’d much rather make out with you until he’s a blushing, panting mess. He can always take a nap after that. It’s a pretty obvious ruse since he will probably fall asleep a few times in the middle of the party with no assistance.

Regardless of when the party is, Belphie insists on sleeping with you the night before the holiday (if it’s a multi-day holiday, then at least the first day of it) and the night before the New Year. If the party is on the night before the holiday/New Year’s Eve, he either tells you to come find him when you’re tired or he’ll stay by your side the entire night. He wants to start the holiday/New Year perfectly, and that means waking up next to you – preferably in your arms. Especially for the New Year, he wants to be the last person you see at the end of the year and the first person you see at the beginning. If he can also be your last and first kiss of the year, he’d be pleased. (Also, if he has the energy, he wants to be the first person you fuck that year too).

Gifts – giving: Himself. Canonically, he’s already done this, but he just likes the idea of offering himself up to you and that you would want him more than anything else, so I could see him doing it again. If he feels compelled to give you an actual present, he’d probably get you matching pajamas. How jealous would the others be if they saw that he had not only crawled into your bed again, but he was also wearing the same pajamas as you? He would feel such a wicked joy from it. Belphie might also give you star-themed accessories, so you’ll always think of him whenever you put it on. For the same possessive reasons as some of his older brothers, Belphie would probably give you a necklace or bracelet.

Gifts – receiving: An alarm clock that actually works on him. Belphie is pretty easy to please as long as you show that you were thinking about him. He’ll gladly take comfortable bedding, pillows, or pajamas. You could also offer to give yourself to him. The only problem is that as much as he loves the idea of having you all to himself for a full day or two, he’ll complain about wanting to keep you as his for longer. “Aww, MC. I don’t want to give you up. Can’t you stay my servant for a few more days. I’ll treat you so well. Don’t you want to keep spoiling me?” He’s grateful, but he likes you doting on him too much. Additionally, he’s another one you could give kinky stuff to. Give him toys and promise to use them on him. Similarly, I feel like he would be delighted if you tied him up, wrapped a soft bow around him (wherever you please), and told him that his gift was going to be that you were going to “take care of him” for a full day. sorry

(the others version)

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ironstrange1991 · 2 years

Text

Jealousy and Submission

+18 Smut (Rough sex)

Pairing: Supreme!Strange x Fem!StarkReader

Synopsis: Stephen's jealousy makes him refuse to talk to the reader for a whole week and she finally decides to put an end to their fight in the best way possible.

Word Count: 3,800k

Warnings: Toxic relationship, Jealousy, Submission, Sexual content including thigh riding, love bites, slapping, choking, male dominance, male masturbation, fingering, p in v, creampie.

A/N: Same pair from Don't Let Me Go and More Than Just a Song. Supreme Strange is really a troubled, very toxic lover. This one is very smutty, completely filth and rough. Hope you like it ;)

It was already 6pm and the movement inside the Baxter Institute was drastically reduced, the few people on your shift had already left, only a few people were still organizing everything for the people on the night shift who hadn't arrived yet.

You finally took off your lab coat and went to your office to get your things and on your way you passed Stephen's office, but he wasn't there. Of course he hasn't bothered to wait for you or even to say goodbye. He had acted like you didn't exist the whole week, worse than that he didn’t answer when you asked him something about work and you hated when he did that, you always argued with him saying he needed to have some sense to separate work from your personal live but he didn't really care what you said.

You sighed saying goodbye to the staff and taking the elevator.

Stephen was mad at you since the benefit ball the Institute held to raise funds for scientific research. During the party, one of the shareholders of Stark Industries, exactly from whom you expected the best donations, began to blatantly hit on you.

Nobody knew you and Stephen were a couple. Well, Reed and Sue knew and your father suspected something was going on, but mostly no one else could know. Nicholas Anderson wasn't necessarily an ugly man, but compared to Stephen he was so ridiculously unattractive and ordinary that you were surprised Stephen could get jealous, but there was no limit to Stephen's jealousy and it always got between you two, it always caused the biggest fights.

Of course you rejected Nick's advances, but you did it subtly, you didn't want to be rude, after all you knew the guy and you really expected a lot from him that night, but Stephen obviously understood that in another way, reaching the absurdity of dancing with a former co-worker from the time he worked as a neurosurgeon. You knew that extremely slow dance was meant to tease you and usually you didn't accept Stephen's teasing, but that night as he drove you home in total silence, jaw tight, clenched teeth, hands almost ripping the steering wheel off the car, you snapped.

Accusations were made on both sides and you insinuated that he slept with all the women at work, which was true when he worked at the hospital, but you knew very well that it didn't apply to who he was now and he replied that you should have slept with Nick to secure a bigger check.

The rest of the way was in grave silence and he left you inside the Stark Tower parking lot and left screeching.

That was on Sunday, it was already Friday and you couldn't take that situation anymore. You missed him and he missed you and it was all ridiculous, he was ridiculous, his jealousy bordered on obsession and you wanted him to apologize for what he said and you should apologize too, but that was the problem. Every time you fought out of jealousy or because Stephen thought you weren't giving him the attention he deserved, it was you who acted to make amends, you were the one who apologized first, it was you who took the blame that wasn't yours just because you couldn't stand being away from him anymore.

You knew it was wrong, that there was something toxic about that relationship, Sue always warned you about it, but you just couldn't help it, you loved him, and the very idea of you being quarreled for one more day seemed absurd to you.

You sighed walking out of the elevator into the parking lot and taking your cell phone and car keys out of your purse. You got in the car waiting for your father to answer the phone.

"Hey baby, still at work?"

You smiled with the pet name, your father was always so affectionate with you.

"I just left, well I'm still in the parking lot. I'm just calling to let you know I might be home late so don't worry."

He sighed into the phone "Don't tell me you're going to the Sanctum."

You sunk in the car seat, your father wasn't exactly a fan of Stephen. Well, he admired Stephen like everyone else, but since he started to understand that there was something between the two of you he started to act different with Stephen, colder, more irritating, always teasing. Stephen ignored it because he didn't want to pick a fight with Tony Stark and besides he knew it would hurt you, but it didn't get any better since your father, like Sue, also started to notice Stephen's behavior with you. You guys worked together, there was no way he wouldn't notice you spent the entire week chasing Stephen and being ignored by him.

"I just want to work this out, talk to him. I know we'll get along as usual."

Your father didn't accept well your words "Baby, I raised you to be better than this. This guy is an asshole, he may be a genius, but that doesn't change the fact that he's a complete idiot. I can’t stand to see you go after him like this..."

You sighed, you've lost count of how many times you've heard that speech. Not just about Stephen, but everything else, and you knew exactly what he meant: You are the daughter of the great Tony Stark, submit to nothing and no one.

"Dad, I'm just going to talk. If he doesn't feel like talking I'll turn and walk away, I swear I won't submit this time."

Your father hummed satisfied with your firm answer. "Fine, good girl. Don't come back too late."

You threw your cell phone on the seat, sighing and banging your head on the steering wheel. You didn't believe a word you said. Of course you were going to submit, you always submitted to Stephen, you practically licked the floor he stepped on. It was embarrassing, but that man was like a god to you and as such you would go there and bow down to him and ask forgiveness for the crime you didn't commit to get him to talk to you again and if everything goes well much more than just to talk.

You started the car and drived around the parking lot taking the avenue driving fast.

God, you missed Stephen. Not just his company, but his touch, the way he made you melt into bed for him. It wasn't uncommon for you to cum more than three times in one night at his hands. Stephen was perfect at sex, it didn't take him long to figure out what you liked and how you liked it and he memorized your every reaction to his every touch and god he used that against you.

It wasn't just his cock that drove you crazy, but his tongue and fingers. Those fingers that would jerk you off and make you cum so fast to the point of being pathetic. It was even more pathetic if you stop to think that since you started having sex with Stephen you couldn't get yourself off anymore, well you could if you were really desperate, but it wasn't the same anymore. Before Stephen nothing was better than your own fingers on you. No one knew your pleasure points better than you, but now he knew, he was better than you at this and you needed him, you missed him and that stupid fight would end tonight.

You parked the car in front of the Sanctum and before you could slam the door it swung open revealing the beautiful and sophisticated interior. At that hour there should be no one but Stephen there. You texted him to let him know you were there, of course he saw the message and didn't respond forcing you to look for him in that huge house, but you knew there was only one place he could be on a Friday night alone at the Sanctum.

You walked slowly to the library thinking of every word you would say to him, but of course when you found him sitting at the table in his blue robes, his blue cloak floating obediently beside his chair, you forgot everything you meant to say.

The cloak flew to you the moment it became aware of your presence, circling your body and enveloping you in what you understood to be a hug. You saw Stephen, who had his face in one hand, look away from the book he was reading and look at you and Cloak with an irritated look. He always claimed that Cloak had an unusual attachment to you, at that moment he seemed to get annoyed with that.

You walked up to him, Cloak flying and standing next to him again.

“Stephen... can we talk?”

He did not answer. Cloak tapped his shoulder insistently pointing at you next.

You sighed. Of course he was going to make things difficult. When did Supreme Strange ever did anything to make your life easier?

"Stephen I'm sorry for what I said. I didn't mean it. I know you're not like that anymore, you…don't sleep with women at work." You laugh nervously "Well, not everyone, just me."

Your smile crumbled when you realized it was no use. It wasn't what he was mad at you for, he wanted you to apologize for Nick, for something you didn't do.

You sighed "I should have dumped Nick sooner. I... let him keep flirting with me. I didn't mean to, but... I'm sorry."

Now he's looked at you at least. God, that man messed with you in unholy ways. Those deep blue eyes seemed to look into your soul and made your legs go soft, not to mention the mess between your legs. You barely realized how much you've missed him physically throughout the week, but there beside him, your body seemed to beg for attention.

He didn't answer you and you didn't know what else to say and maybe it would be better to listen to your father and turn your back and walk away, but how could you do that when you loved him so much? Besides, if you couldn't solve it that night, it was very likely that you wouldn't be able to do it anymore, and you couldn't bear the thought of losing him.

You went for the last weapon you had. You forced your legs to walk to him, stopping just behind the chair. Cloak flew away giving the two of you privacy and you wrapped your arms around him, your lips placing a purposefully wet kiss on his neck.

"I miss you. Don't tell me you don't miss me too I know it's a lie."

He sighed, his first uncontrolled reaction to your attempt to make amends. You turned your head to whisper in the other ear "I know you're mad at me, but there are other interesting ways to punish me, Stephen."

He turned the page of the book continuing to read and you rolled your eyes. How melodramatic could he be? Did he expect you to actually get down on your knees and ask for forgiveness? You didn't doubt that he might actually want that.

You trailed your lips down his neck, your hands wandering down his chest.

"You're distracting me from my reading."

His voice made your knees tremble. He seemed to sing to you every time he spoke, that wonderful baritone voice sending electricity straight to your aching core.

You smiled contentedly and walk around him putting yourself between him and the desk. He looked at you annoyed.

You brought your hands to the hem of your skirt and lifted it enough so you could spread your legs and sit on one of his thighs. You smirked when he hissed feeling the warmth and wetness through the fabric of your panties and his pants. You were so desperate for him and his particularly muscular thigh fit you perfectly making you abandon any dignity and start moving your hips to get some friction.

He stared at you in disbelief as a moan escaped your lips. You put your hands on his shoulders, increasing the pace of your movements. Your thigh scraped against his bulge and he twitched, jaw tight, teeth clenched. He was hard, but he didn't want to give in. You did it again this time on purpose and he groaned annoyed realizing that this was a game he couldn't win.

You moaned louder now, your hands went down to his thigh and you increased your pace, riding his thigh in circular motions. You were so close now, all the tension in your body melting in the face of your pleasure, all your problems crumbling as that delicious shiver formed in the pit of your stomach.

"Oh my god...fuck."

You panted, surendering to your climax, your legs shaking convulsively, rubbing his shaft in the process. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders and laid your head on the crook of his neck allowing your breathing to slowly return to normal and smelled the masculine scent of sweat, perfume and cigarettes coming from him. "Stephen... I love you."

Now you had reached the new low. If that wasn't submitting, you didn't know what to call it.

He sighed and you smiled feeling his arms wrapping around your waist and pressing you against his body. His head drooping to rest on yours. "I want everyone to know about us. Everyone. I'm tired of hiding our relationship and as long as we hide, things like that will keep happening, they will keep hitting on you and I swear to god next time I'm going to kill someone."

You raised your head looking at him in surprise. "Is that why you were angry? Because I asked you to keep it secret?"

He did not answer. He was still angry.

"Why? Why do we need to keep our relationship hidden? The people who matter know. Your father knows, he makes a point of reminding me of that every day."

You touched his face shaking your head "It's ok. I agree. We don't need to hide it anymore."

He sighed in relief "Fuck this, I need you."

He grabbed you by the waist getting up and turned you around bending you over the desk. He magic away his robes and lifted your skirt to your waist and lowered your panties to your knees. He forced your thighs further apart and ran his fingers through your slit, collecting the slick and running it over the tip of his cock. He rubbed the tip at your entrance and you gripped the edge of the table knowing full well what awaited you.

He entered you with a single thrust that knocked the air out of your lungs, the familiar pinch in your gut making you moan in pain and pleasure at the same time. He groaned loudly letting his cock inside you and waited for you to settle around him before starting to thrust, but when he started he was merciless.

You groaned loudly, clinging to the desk as if clinging to life itself, his thrusts punishing you with absurd harshness.

"You. are. mine." Each word separated by an even stronger, deeper thrust. You groaned in response.

"Say it. I need to hear you saying it."

You agreed, but the words seemed to slip out of your mind. The silence of the room was filled by the creaking of the desk, the sound of skin slapping against skin and your breaths and moans and grunts.

He brought one hand to your shoulder, the other holding tight to your waist, the weight of his body against yours, he pulled your shirt by the collar making the buttons fly all over the place and started to place open mouth kisses on your skin, He bit your shoulder hard and soothed it with his tongue and moved to your neck kissing, biting, licking, sucking.

He slapped your ass "Say you are mine."

You moaned feeling another orgasm building inside you "I'm yours Stephen, I'm yours and no one else's."

He took the hand that was firm on your shoulder to your neck, choking you softly but enough to make you lose yourself in your high, murmuring sweet praises to him "I love you so much, Stephen, you make me feel so good, you fuck me so good..."

He pulled away turning you and placing you sitting on the desk, he pulled your panties off throwing them on the floor and stuck two fingers inside you "Look how wet you are after coming twice. I love it."

He ran the tip of his cock through your slit smearing it with your cum and jerked his cock a few times sticking two fingers back inside you. You loved seeing Stephen jerk off like that in front of you and he liked to be watched.

"Look how hard I am for you, honey. You like it, don't you? You like to see me stroking my cock. Do you think that's enough for me to get one more orgasm out of you?"

You nodded. You could feel that you still weren't sated, his teasing taking effect. Stephen knew how to push all your buttons. He took his fingers full of your slick from inside you and brushed it across your lips. "Open for me, I want you to taste yourself." You complied and he stuck his fingers in your mouth "Suck it. Suck it like you're sucking my cock."

You obeyed by slipping your tongue between his fingers and then sucking them by moving your head up and down and making a popping noise as you took them out of your mouth. He hissed and brought his fingers up to your clit and began rubbing in circular motions as he continued stroking his cock.

"Stephen...put it back inside me. Fuck me."

He smiled satisfied.

"Spread your legs for me. More. Just like that" He spat on his cock and gave a few more jerks and put it back inside you in one go.

You clung to his neck lifting your legs as high as you could, wrapping them around his waist to get him to penetrate you as deep as possible, his balls slamming against your ass, the sound of skin on skin mingling with the wet noises of his cock coming in and out of your cunt. Sex with Stephen was always so obscene and so delicious.

You moaned loudly as his lips searched for yours, he kissed you with such desperation moving his lips down your chin, licking your skin all the way to your neck sucking until he left purple marks, biting down hard making you wince in pain and yet wish he would keep doing it. "Stephen... you are such a good lover, I never had anyone like you before and I don’t want to, there is only you for me."

He groaned at your words, his lips returning to meet yours, his tongue penetrating your mouth with the same lust as his cock fucked you. You were on the verge of another orgasm and this time you needed him to cum with you. You put both hands on his chest pushing him and he pulled away enough for you to get off the desk and turn your back to him.

He pulled you against his body and entered you hard again, one hand gripping your waist so tightly you were sure it would leave marks, the other firm on your throat, tilting your head to the side to make room for him. He bit your neck again, sucking on that delicate area just below your ear, making you shiver.

"You make me want to fucking destroy you." He said between his groans.

He increased the pace of his thrusts even more, your bodies collided with overwhelming violence and you loved it. You could lie all you wanted to yourself, but Stephen's possessiveness over you was exactly what drew you to him. You loved the feeling of belonging to him, of submitting to him and letting him do with you as he pleased. Stephen wasn't like other men, he was better, he was superior, only he could make you cum multiple times like that.

You could feel his cock throbbing, his breath heavy in your ear, the thrusts getting more ragged. He was close and so were you.

"What would your father say if he could see you now?" He breathed into your ear teasing "Daddy's little prodigy girl submitting to me like that?" He bit your shoulder "Do you think he would approve? Would he be proud?"

You shook your head no moaning. You were so close. “Stephen please… I need to cum.”

He hummed "Me too honey, I'm gonna fill you up. Would you like that?"

"Yes, Stephen please."

"So say it one more time, I want to hear it."

"I'm yours Stephen, only yours."

He moaned loudly, spilling into you, thrusting his cum deep inside you with such violence that made your legs weak as you surrendered to your third orgasm moaning his name and creaming his cock.

He stayed inside you for a minute, he cupped your chin and turned your face to him kissing you, his tongue forcing your lips to part, dominating you, he always dominated you and you loved it.

He broke the kiss "You better remember that from now on because I cherish what's mine and I'm very, very jealous." He whispered menacingly in your ear.

He pulled away from you, you felt his cum running down your legs, your body aching everywhere he squeezed and bit and yet you never felt more satisfied. He turned you to face him and kissed you, now softly, just a touch of lips. He conjured up a damp towel and cleaned himself up, then pulled on his blue robes again with just a flick of his fingers.

He used the towel to wipe his cum off your legs, up to between your thighs, his eyes on you. God, he even made that sexy.

He disappeared with the towel and picked your panties off the floor and helped you into them and lowered your skirt, he straightened your shirt in place, using magic to repair the ripped buttons. He fixed your shirt collar and smirked

"I'm sure your father will approve those"

You sighed running your hands through your hair, a few strands falling loose from the perfect bun. "Your fixation on my father is getting pathetic." You said releasing your hair at once and throwing it over your shoulders, now totally hiding the marks he left on you.

He widened his smile "It's a power game."

You rolled your eyes running your hand through his hair which was now also disheveled, some strands falling across his forehead. You brought your hand down caressing his face and pulled him to your lips kissing him passionately.

"You need to shave." You complained on his lips.

He nodded "I will."

Leave a comment if you liked it. Interact! I will love to read all of your comments and opinions. It inspires me to keep writing ;)

MASTERLIST

Taglist: @withalittlehoney @graveyzxbabe @dontmindme262 @bloodyflowerrr @insanelyobsessedwithdilfs @sassenach-on-the-rocks @iobsessoverfictionalmen @sherlocksgirl91 @dragonqueen89 @newtsniffles @strangelockd @evelynrosestuff @cute-angi @whiskeyho @prix1994 @sherlux @xourownsidee @rbymoon @kakashibabe02 @hobimysolecito @geeky-politics-46 @lykaonimagines @d0ct0rstrangewife @classickook

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badstargateimagines · 7 months

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Vala Deserved Better and This is My Proposal For How I Would Give Her Better

Here are all the things that I think Vala and I would do if they ever let her breach fucking containment. Jesus H. Christ let the woman LIVE!!! Shout out to @judgeverse and all the other fine folks in the discord for giving me this powerful vision

Go to the club

Obvious but apparently too much for the writers to handle

We would go with like 40 dollars between us and we would find a man to buy us drinks for the night and then give him a fake snap/number at the end of the night

She would finally experience the experience of the bathroom at a club and I think she would find it extremely healing

We would close that bitch and then go and get kebab before we called an uber to get us home

Pre Drinks

This would happen before the club obv but I think pre is a VITAL component to the experience while also being nearly entirely separate

All the SGC girlies chilling doing their makeup

We are all chilling on the floor of a living room using what using whatever mirrors we have close to us sharing big pile of makeup

Our brushes are filthy and Janet is low-key lecturing us about the dangers of sharing eye shadow and having dirty makeup brushes

Her's are also dirty

We have a Spotify jam going that absolutely shreds

We started out w a playlist but then we all wanted to show Vala some tracks so we needed to collaborate.

I show her Meghan Thee Stallion so when she comes on at the club she knows what to do

Janet shows her all the Y2K bangers

Sam just goes fucking crazy on the queue and puts everything from midwest emo to sea shanties on there

Shots obvs

Cam and Daniel keep texting the gc to ask when we're leaving for the club and we keep saying we're leaving soon

We brief Vala on club/bar safety so she doesn't go missing or perish or something

Watching movies but specifically the Barbie movie

I think she would find it very healing

She starts calling men Kens

A week later I find her watching TikTok edits under the 'close your eyes and feel' sound and we watch them together and cry

I gather mine and my mom's old Barbies and we play with them because there is no age-limit on Barbie!!!

I get distracted and go over the bonkers plotlines I used to give my Barbies back in the day.

I also show her other movies that altered my brain chemistry

The Breakfast Club

Mean Girls

Legally Blonde

Pretty in Pink

Ferris Bueller's Day Off

Freaky Friday (2003)

Hairspray (2007)

Going for drives in a total shitbox while blasting music

She needs to experience driving around aimlessly for an hour and then ending up having a life-changing conversation in a random parking lot

Girlhood (TM)

Going to the mall

Sometimes you need to show aliens capitalism in action

I have to physically drag her out of bath and body works before she gets swindled into paying full price for a candle like a rube

I explain to her that she just has to wait a couple weeks for candles to go on a like 6 for the price of 2 sale or something and that I will tell her when it's happening

She is baffled by this revelation but listens to me because of my credentials (used to work at a mall and have a spending addiction)

We also buy a new outfit and then go to Sephora to get our makeup done to go w the new fit and also so I can show her my roots

She will also experience The Mall Pretzel

Sleepovers!!!!!

I would do my best to create the ultimate sleepover vibes

I'm talking we buy brand new fuzzy PJs, I string up christmas lights, every snack we could ever want, the entire living room is transformed into a comfy cozy area with everything we could ever need close to us

Trashy reality show playing on autoplay on the TV at a low volume so we can still talk and listen to music but also hear Kris Jenner saying out of pocket shit to her children

I would also give the experience of playing Nintendogs with your bestie

Maybe even a powerpoint night??

Putting tinder on the big screen and roasting men together

Playing the Sims and collaborating on the most ridiculous sims and houses to ever exist

Go Karting

Let this woman at the wheel immediately!!!

We could kick ass and then get a lifetime ban from the track

These 10-year-olds aren't ready for us!!!

Lighting section at Home Depot

Self-explanatory

IKEA

We would spend so many hours there just pretending we were furnishing a mansion with unlimited money

Saying: "Omg this should be in the Sims" to each other

The IKEA cafeteria my beloved

The only thing we buy is a Djungelskog each

Racing the carts in the warehouse part

A crucial yet forbidden part of the experience

Karaoke

She would love karaoke

No further points your honour

#stargate #sg1 #stargate sg1 #vala mal doran #bad stargate imagines #sam carter #janet fraiser #daniel jackson #cameron mitchell

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norringtondeservestheworld · 1 year

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You all I FINALLY got a Playstation 5 a month ago (so happy!!!) and while the 90% of the owners of a PS5 are talking about THAT wizard game which name I’ll not say I’m here, obsessed with Detroit Become Human. I mean I wanted to play it since the day it was released (five years ago lmao I know I’m late) but I couldn’t because I didn’t have the console but now I do and I knew it was great but OH MY GOD I didn’t except to be THAT GOOD. IT’S A MASTERPIECE. IT’S ONE OF THE BEST GAME EVER CREATED. Like I bought it 4 weeks ago and I already did 3 different walkthroughs (yes that’s why I haven’t been a lot on tumblr lately sorry about that) but I can’t wait any longer to talk about it so here you go, my opinions about this awesome game and everything I loved about Detroit Become Human who none asked for. You’re welcome (if you are following me for Braime or something else and you don’t want to see things about Detroit Become Human don’t worry just filter/block the tag, I tag all the posts).

- Always loved the games where a story takes different ways because of your choices (my icon is literally a screen from a game who works that way) and this one has like 99+ different endings based of how you played and most chapters have like 5 different endings like hello??? I love this???

- The screenwriting is terrific. Amazing. And I don’t mean only the story, but the dialogues and characters too. The characters OH MY GOD. There isn’t a single positive character that I didn’t get attached to and none of them is stereotyped, not even the villains. Fuck David Cage, why you didn’t write GOT??? It’s a totally different story from DBH, but I know you could have done better than Dumb & Dumber. Before buying it, I was 100% positive to do every single choice even the worst ones who would get every character killed but now I can’t??? I love them all???

- I wish the story was longer. It wasn’t short at all, but the story was that profound and beautiful and I love these characters I wanted more????

- Loved how they showed the way androids were treated by humans. They didn’t show a lot of the violence humans did to androids because they didn’t need to. Because you could feel it. Seeing public places with “Androids not allowed” on the door and seeing them in the bus being in a limited space for them separated from the humans exactly like it happened to jews and black community in the past. Also the camps where in the end they put the androids to exterminate them look intentionally like Extermination Camps (even in the game itself they say so). A punch in the stomach.

- Loved that most of the characters are androids. The only human character of the protagonists is Hank, literally everyone else is an android and this was perfect. This is a story about androids. They are the ones who are being oppressed. And the humans in this story are pretty good in their villains roles.

- Thank God they didn’t put a romance as the main theme of the story, “an impossibile love between an android or a human” bullshit. This is a story about robots created by humans that were treated like objects, that were a property, who were selled on shops, and they were THAT oppressed they were able to develop emotions and their own personality and break their program to be themselves, people who wanted their freedom and start living as the living beings they are with dignity. This is what makes the story powerful.

- Loved that when Kara, Markus and Connor stop being machines and become deviants you see them fighting against an invisible wall until it’s destroyed, because that wall is their programming and breaking it means they’ll be free to be who they want, stopping being a machine and becoming a living being. Beautiful.

- Android Chloe being on the menu settings that talks to you sometimes but when you finish the story for the first time she tells you she feels different and ask you the permission to leave to discover herself and if you say yes she thank you and leaves??? I don’t know who had this idea but he/she is a genius

- The music. Gods. The music.

And the characters. Gods. Let’s talk about them.

- I knew Connor is loved by everyone and I fully expected to don’t like him that much. I was wrong. I love him.

- I don’t know what the fuck is going on between Markus and Simon, but there isn’t a single logical heterosexual explanation for them. Actually wait, I kinda know what’s going on 😁

- Never romanced North in any of my walkthroughs and never will. I love her but fuck it, if Simon can’t have Markus, NONE CAN.

- I love Ralph. So much. He deserved more screen time! They put him there to scare you with him being mentally unstable and always with a big knife in his hand (pretty sure he killed people too but shhh), but he’s like that because of trauma!! Someone help him and give him some love and therapy!! It’s crazy that they worked so hard making him so interesting when some players don’t even know of his existence since he has like 10 minutes of screen time and you met him only if you do certain choices. Again, the writing is killing it.

- Loved that Zlatko got killed (at least in my walkthrough) from the androids he tortured for fun. Poetic cinema. Freeing them from their cells so they could kill him was one of the best choices I made in this game.

- Protect Simon at all costs. Him and Ralph are the kings in being cinnamon rolls.

- I know a lot of people ships Hank and Connor, but I actually got the Father/Son dynamic from them? I can see why someone like them as a romantic couple, but I see them like a Parent and his kid, like Joel and Ellie from the Last of Us. They have the best non romantic relationship of the game.

- North, Simon and Josh following Markus wherever he goes being ready to die every time, even if they disagree with his approach. Wow. That’s fucking loyalty.

- Markus has the best story, Connor the best arc and Kara has the most anxious story (with better plot twists). At least in my opinion. Everyone is the best in something.

- Loved that Kara and Alice met Luther because of Zlatko. After that awful experience with him, it’s good to know that it brought something positive too.

- I fangirled everytime two of the three main characters of the game met, I didn’t even know it was possible??? I fangirled even more when I saw the choice of making Connor a deviant.

- It makes sense that Connor becomes a deviant at the end, since he was created to stop deviants, he needed more time to evolve and to break his program. I just wished i saw more of him with Markus and the Jericho group fighting together against the humans, the humans he worked with before, and I wanted him to interact with Simon, since if previously you did different choices, Simon would have died because of Connor. Maybe if you pick certain choices they meet? I don’t know.

Everyone should play this. Everyone should know this amazing, profound story. This isn’t game, this is an experience. It has been done with passion. Passion from everyone. From David Cage who created this story and these characters and from the actors who played them with such emotion. Part of me wish they made a series they already have the actors since the characters have the actors’ appearance well maybe except the actress who played Alice I imagine she grown up but actually nope, the game is already with great cinematography and music and acting, it looks already a series. A great series.

Thanks to everyone who read it all!!! Sorry for the rant it’s just I love this story so much!!! And I’m looking for Detroit Become Human’s blogs (and maybe Markus x Simon blogs if possible, my shipper heart need them). Comment if you post about it so I can follow you please!!!

#dbh #detroit become human #simarkus #simkus #dbh markus #dbh connor #dbh kara #dbh simon #markus #kara #connor #dbh ralph #detroit being human #markus x simon #simon x markus

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miraculouscontent · 2 years

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So, with all the talk about Adrien being “troubled”/”abused” and how that excuses everything “because he’s sad” and whatever, I’d like to take the moment to shamelessly gush about refer to Not-Sew-Wicked Stepmom to explain what I feel is this sort of thing done right and how it can be touched on properly.

(this contains heavy spoilers for Not-Sew-Wicked Stepmom and I highly discourage reading this post if you don’t want to be spoiled as this is an integral plot point)

(also, trigger warning for sexual assault)

(for my actual points for those who have already read the story and understand the contents, skip to the bottom to get my conclusion because the whole “start” of this post is only me recapping Not-Sew-Wicked’s story and explaining what I adore about how they deal with things there without any mention of Adrien)

For those who haven’t heard me talk about it before, Not-Sew-Wicked is a manhwa in the isekai genre, a genre in which characters get transported/reincarnated into a piece of media, another universe, or anything similar. In this case, a fashion designer becomes the wicked stepmother of a Snow White story, Abigail, though she has no interest in playing the villainess and ends up absolutely adoring and spoiling her cute stepdaughter, Blanche.

The problem, however, is that she can only do so much as a stepmother who everyone fears because of the villainess who originally inhabited that body, meaning that few trust her and it takes time to build up her relationships with others.

The biggest roadblock to this is her husband (Blanche’s father) Sabrian who is, in her words:

He’s the typical strict parental figure, not showing Blanche much affection and treating Abigail with complete and total disinterest. Even when the original Abigail was on her deathbed (having been seemingly poisoned before the current Abigail took over her body), Sabrian expressed zero sorrow or regret towards her, only desiring that they not meet again “in the next life.” He’s going to be our “tortured soul” for the day and one who I am going to defend.

(I’m also going to state outright - to show that I have no biases here - that Sabrian as he begins is the exact opposite of the kind of ML I take interest in. The “male lead with an attitude problem” has never been one I like no matter what their sad backstory is, but Sabrian works for me and thus I’m targeting him as my example).

The first thing to point out is that the current Abigail has the original’s memories and said memories are obviously limited to that Abigail’s point of view. Regardless of Sabrian’s actions (which we’ll get to, don’t worry), the original Abigail was still a villainess whose ego was bruised by Sabrian’s constant rejections.

He abandons her at the wedding reception with the excuse that he’s tired, leaves her alone on their wedding night, and goes so far as to say that he will never, ever lay even a finger on her. He’s kept his word on that as well despite them sharing a bed, and after Abigail “comes back from the dead” (in actuality, she’s a new person due to the isekai, unbeknownst to everyone else), Sabrian goes so far as to ask her if she poisoned herself for attention.

While his words are harsh and without any consideration for Abigail, the current Abigail also acknowledges that Sabrian’s rejections of the original made her essentially obsessed with gaining his affection, and said original would put herself into peril for the sake of earning something from him. The question is also relevant because it’s a waste of resources investigating who poisoned her if she actually did it to herself.

All Abigail can do then is insist that she no longer has feelings for him and won’t bother earning his affection anymore, though asks in exchange that he treat his daughter with more love and care.

Sabrian, while shocked at the offer and accepting of her other idea of having separate bedrooms, tells her to stay out of matters concerning his abilities as a father since Blanche is his child.

Outraged, Abigail expresses her right for concern as Blanche’s stepmother before excusing herself. Even when acknowledging the past Abigail’s actions and bad behavior (such as the obsession towards Sabrian), she doesn’t dismiss Sabrian’s attitude and considers him absolute, complete trash.

This is the first piece of the puzzle: the bad actions of others do not excuse the coldness that Sabrian is displaying, especially when he goes so far as to shun Abigail at events despite customs dictating that he do otherwise. At the end of the day, he’s still being unfair to her. It’s not about him having no interest in her, it’s about his behavior and refusal to follow the “rules” despite burying himself in work (the latter of which implies his dedication as a ruler and makes it all the more strange that he’d go against tradition just to have no contact with her).

The story continues from there, and it doesn’t take any longer than episode six for the audience to see Sabrian outside of Abigail’s perspective. While he may treat Blanche coldly, we’re shown him keeping an eye on Abigail’s movements as well as Blanche.

While the audience is aware that Abigail wants nothing more than Blanche’s happiness and is spying on her in order to give her a gift, Sabrian is not. Keep in mind as well that the original Abigail emotionally abused Blanche, which Sabrian is fully aware of.

Though he doesn’t express affection towards Blanche openly, he clearly has some form of care for her, to the point of intercepting Abigail before the gift is properly given, while also taking some...

rather extreme measures, demanding the gift from Abigail and ripping it in half with a sword.

Obviously, from the perspective of the audience, this is infuriating to see an innocent gift get massacred even if the bunny still gets repaired in the end. As we’re following Abigail’s point of view and she is the party that’s objectively nice and caring, we’re more inclined to feel sympathetic towards her.

And, once again, even though Sabrian’s actions are rooted in what the original Abigail has done, he’s taking everything to the extreme without properly communicating, which causes his first moment of seeing the “new” Abigail when she laments the destruction of the gift.

Even with Abigail’s brief conversation with/scolding of him to treat Blanche with more love, it naturally doesn’t ease his wariness of her. Sabrian’s decisions also aren’t derived wholly from his emotions and are based in logic. It’s extremely easy to hate and roast him for his actions, but his suspicions, at the very least, would make sense even if one disagrees with the actions he takes to confront them.

And, when confronted with the fact that Abigail has genuinely been nice to everyone and has been treating Blanche with gifts of all sorts, Sabrian feels actual, genuine guilt.

Guilt is incredibly important for something like this. Sabrian doesn’t brush off the moment or adamantly deny that Abigail is hurt. When faced with the rumors that have been spreading about Abigail’s change, Sabrian feels guilty for hurting her even if he had reasons for being skeptical of her.

It’s also here - episode eight - where we get the first official glimpse that Sabrian's personality runs deeper than the idea of him being a jerk just for the sake of it.

The manhwa does not wait in showing that Sabrian has his own inner demons and doing it effectively. It’s not just addressed either, as in “Sabrian clearly has some form of trauma but he’s going to stay rooted to his mindset for three seasons.”

No, because this is a piece of media where things aren’t supposed to stagnate. Regardless of how “““realistic”““ something might be, a plot shouldn’t waste its time constantly excusing a characters’ actions with how sad they are while not forcing them to grow past what they already know.

Thus, immediately after this moment (where a more subpar story would try to use this to either shift blame to Abigail or lengthen the audience’s patience in terms of how long they’ll tolerate Sabrian acting as he does without growth), Sabrian directly realizes that he’s screwed up.

Likewise, when Abigail forces her way into Sabrian’s space, exploiting his discomfort (which she thinks is just him despising her) to insist that he apologize to her for doubting her/destroying the doll, Sabrian - eventually - swallows his pride and does so.

Do also note that the implications of the extent of Sabrian’s trauma came after him starting to feel guilty, not before. The plot didn’t ask its audience to grow invested in a jerk ML before showing that he was capable of feeling remorse for his actions. It waited and showed that there was more to him first.

Of course, he’s still extremely, incredibly flawed, but the audience wasn’t asked to take a chance on Sabrian without seeing more than him being rude. In addition, the manhwa made it abundantly clear that Sabrian has problems, but still had him recognize that he hurt Abigail’s feelings, had him feel guilty for it, and apologize when presented with the opportunity. This is all within the first ten episodes so that the Sabrian who acts and is rightfully thought of as trash doesn’t last for so long that the audience feels that that’s all there is to him.

The change isn’t instantaneous either to the point of completely breaking all suspension of disbelief. Over the course of the next twenty chapters, Sabrian makes more attempts to listen to Abigail when she speaks up but is still somewhat rooted in his ways. He’s still strict, but acknowledges when he’s offended her. He’s more hesitant to doubt her, shows concern when she’s ill, and folds when she asks him to spend more time with his daughter to fulfill his role as a father (communicating/debating with her when he didn’t understand the importance of it out of genuine ignorance).

(Sabrian also fits the mold of “doesn’t know any better” more as well, genuinely not seeing the correlation between something like “being family” and “having dinner” together until Abigail tries to explain it to him.)

Sabrian even admits to Abigail (even though she doesn’t get the specifics of it) that he “doesn’t understand the concept of paternal love” when she questions his distance from Blanche, the question brought on by the idea that Sabrian had been in love with the late former queen and seeing Blanche reminded him of it.

Sabrian denied the suggestion, and the questions/concerns about what his reasoning behind keeping Blanch distant - as well as why he took so long to look for a new queen if he indeed had no feelings for her - increase, with some rumors implying that Sabrian is unsure that Blanche is his biological daughter.

This continues to a moment where Abigail needs to ask Sabrian if he’ll dance with her at an event in order to quell some concerns of people she knows, though aware that he might refuse given that he’d turned the original Abigail away the year before. Sabrian tries to refuse her due to his (still unexplained) issues, but finds himself incapable of doing so firmly due to his relationship with her having developed/progressed (and the fact that Abigail no longer reminds him of the ghostly woman we’d seen back in episode eight).

Though, predictably, when the time finally comes for him to practice dancing with her, he can’t do it.

Sabrian, having been caught in a reaction that stemmed from his trauma, hurriedly distances himself in order to both escape the situation and let himself breathe. Everything that had happened before led up to this, not specifically because he refused to communicate (he’d been communicating with Abigail fairly consistently, just not about his past), but rather due to a refusal to move past his trauma.

(important to note as well that he does feel immediately guilty for swatting Abigail’s hand away)

Without dropping several more panels here, I’ll just say that Sabrian had never gotten love at all when it mattered, not from his parents and certainly not from the late queen. Him distancing himself from Blanche is, in part, due to that method of parenting being the only thing he knew, and in another part due to the belief that Blanche would grow less timid if he didn’t coddle her.

But, over the course of the “new” Abigail asking more of him as a father figure, it’s shown that his way isn’t the way, because the one time where Blanche approaches him first is to speak with him over what he did to Abigail during the practice dance.

That’s another point in the manhwa’s favor. Sabrian is virtually never rewarded for his rude behavior; he has to learn from it and feels guilty when he accidentally slips back into old habits.

Thus, Sabrian goes to talk to Abigail once more and comes clean about everything that had happened, both apologizing and explaining why he reacted the way he did.

To make a long and extremely depressing backstory short, Sabrian was rather sickly when he was younger. His father was dead by the time he was fourteen and his mother wanted to ensure that there would have an heir in case anything happened to him. To do that, she enlisted the help of a power-hungry woman who wanted to become the future queen...

and was perfectly willing to force herself onto Sabrian to do it, even if he was running a fever at the time and could barely process anything. Ever since, he couldn’t physically touch women and Blanche served as a reminder of that trauma.

For me personally, the sad or tragic backstory of a character shouldn’t just be there to make you sympathize with them, but to understand them. It’s easy enough to throw the worst possible backstory onto a character and run with it, but the true success lies from making it complex and compelling enough to where each of a character’s actions come from different parts of that past.

Sabrian doesn’t tell Abigail his story to make her pity him or use his trauma as an excuse; he does it to explain to her why he reacted the way he did and to fully communicate everything that had happened, not wanting to leave her in the dark. He even takes blame for his own trauma, which Abigail rightfully rejects because it’s not his fault that such terrible things happened to him when he was younger.

The narrative doesn’t try to throw blame onto Abigail for things she couldn’t have known about either. Even though she does try to apologize for past actions, he reminds her that she didn’t know and he hadn’t told her.

Finally, and most importantly, Sabrian (of his own suggestion) is willing to move on from what happened, and asks for Abigail’s help in doing so if she’s willing.

It seems like a very simple thing, but that’s really all that’s needed for the kind of growth a traumatized character needs, and Sabrian continues practicing with Abigail until he’s able to touch her without turning into an anxious wreck, so that they can dance together.

Also, I won’t spoil anything beyond this point (especially because most of it is beyond where the official translation is), but I will say that Sabrian absolutely becomes weak for Abigail as all of his edges smooth out. His relationship with Blanche improves as well and they grow closer as a family.

To Summarize:

Sabrian succeeds where Adrien fails for a number of reasons, both with the writing and with the characters themselves. Sabrian being an adult while Adrien is a teenager is irrelevant because the way their respective media deals with whatever emotional struggles they face should be the same regardless of age.

Not-Sew-Wicked doesn’t hide Sabrian’s actions from Abigail; she knows the rude things he’s done and thus makes an informed decision when he reveals his past to her. Miraculous, meanwhile, hides a good chunk of Adrien’s/Chat’s actions from Marinette/Ladybug, meaning that the foundation for their relationship is already flawed and she has fake agency due to lacking a full set of information.

Sabrian’s sad backstory isn’t used to excuse his actions. He’s flawed, feels guilty, apologizes, and works to do better, eventually even without Abigail’s suggestion. Adrien, meanwhile, has been stated by the writers as “perfect” and “it’s the world that needs to change.”

Sabrian’s issues are dealt with over the course of thirty-four chapters and he takes the steps to improve, recognizing that he was the one who needed to change. Adrien’s position has stayed virtually the same for four seasons now and the show has practically admitted that it’s Marinette’s responsibility to “be the knight that saves the princess from the castle.”

Sabrian bottling in his emotions negatively affects him. Adrien bottling in his own often adds to his Sad Points and negatively affects others (see: Marinette in “Risk”/”Strikeback”) more than himself (see: how the plot in “Risk”/”Strikeback” resolves itself without Adrien having to stand up for himself).

(also throwing out there that Sabrian’s worse actions are towards people who are directly related in some form to his trauma or who have wronged him - Abigail, who is a woman that once reminded him of the late queen, pursued him despite his rejections in their contract marriage, and was originally a villainess, and Blanche who is a child made through him being sexually assaulted as a teenager - whereas Adrien just takes out his emotional issues on Marinette/Ladybug even if it’s unfair to her)

Sabrian genuinely does not know any better and eventually starts hearing Abigail out when she tries to explain things to him. Adrien does know better (”Kuro Neko”) and chooses to continue acting out anyway.

Getting Sabrian’s point-of-view is beneficial and shows his thought process as well as his guilt. Getting Adrien’s point-of-view only shows what we already knew; that he’s extremely childish and pushing himself further into the idea that he’s the one who's been wronged (i.e: using the Ladybug and Chat figures to play out a scene of Ladybug saying that she doesn’t trust him) while the show still has the gall to ask the audience to feel sympathetic for him.

Sabrian’s motives - at least at times - are rooted in some form of logic, such as distrusting Abigail initially since she’d been abusive towards Blanche in the past. Adrien’s motives are rooted entirely by emotion (acknowledging Ladybug’s responsibility role and then throwing a fit when she doesn’t let him in on matters that don’t concern him, thinking that Marinette doesn’t like him and then going “well I want her to like me so I’ll prank her despite knowing that she’s easily flustered,” and destroying public property solely because he wasn’t included in a plan despite his powers being situational). To give a separate example from Miraculous - since it seems so keen on accusing Ladybug of excluding Chat Noir - Ladybug was basically told by Chat Blanc that everyone in Paris is dead because of their romantic relationship, thus Ladybug makes an effort to discourage LadyNoir (both from herself, Chat, and otherwise) even more than before as well as not making efforts to get closer to Chat; that’s not just emotional, that’s logical.

Sabrian is encouraged by the narrative to change, as his tactics do not only fail to give him the result he wants, but Abigail usually gets (rightfully) upset with him. Adrien, meanwhile, is encouraged not to change, as usually being sad or throwing a tantrum ends with the narrative rewarding him (him trying to quit in “Syren” and still getting what he wants anyway, getting the Ladybug blush/shoulder lean in “Glaciator” and “Chat Blanc” respectively, getting Ladybug to apologize to him first in “Glaciator,” him being the one to swoop in and be the savior in “Frozer,” and so on).

Abigail, Blanche, and Sabrian are also all treated with care over their various problems, whereas Miraculous heavily skews into Adrien’s favor while sidelining Marinette, often making her the one who has to screw up and apologize even if her reasoning and level of reaction is valid).

Sabrian being more obviously/openly rude compared to Adrien doesn’t make Adrien better. With Sabrian, I understand him as a character and can piece together his actions as time goes on, but with Adrien, I can only see him as a writer’s pet whose put on a pedestal with excuses of “he’s sad and Ladybug is so mean to him so whatever he does is fine uwu.” Abigail was never forced to “consider Sabrian’s feelings” because his actions still hurt her and were in the wrong, but Marinette has to consider Adrien’s even when he’s blatantly in the wrong and following his advice/scolding is actively detrimental to her.

I can appreciate Sabrian as a traumatized character because traumatized characters can do bad things and it still makes them bad people even if they have trauma because them having trauma doesn’t make things okay. He’s not a villain, but rather a(n initially) jerk of an ML who learns to do better and finds that his life is better for it.

I can’t appreciate Adrien because of the show’s unrelenting insistence on keeping him exactly where he is and forcing the world to bend around him even if Marinette has to suffer for it. While Not-Sew-Wicked is happy to put Sabrian on the backburner to develop Abigail’s relationship with Blanche/other people, Miraculous ensures that its main plot revolves around Adrien and his family, bringing him up even when it’s not necessary so the audience doesn’t forget about him. His role in design is to be little more than the “sunshine boy” who’s constantly tugging on the viewers heartstrings so they feel bad for him and favor him because “he’s done nothing wrong”/”it’s so unfair” even as the show intends on giving him exactly what he wants in the end anyway.

#category: salt #salt: adrien agreste #salt: chat noir #other: non ml talk #salt: writing #((I may or may not be content starved for Not-Sew-Wicked due to it being in-between seasons so I'll take the opportunity to gush.))

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