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dreamyinception-world · 1 month

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𝔹𝕖𝕔𝕒𝕦𝕤𝕖 𝕐𝕠𝕦 𝔻𝕖𝕤𝕖𝕣𝕧𝕖 𝕀𝕥

pairing: Kim Hongjoong, Park Seonghwa, Kang Yeosang

w/c: 2.3k

Genre: Partial Office AU, Smut, Established Relationship, Friends with Benefits, Threesome(ish)

Summary: Hongjoong always looks forward to his calls with Yeosang to cheer him up, make him smile or laugh during his break time at work. However, feeling particularly bold one day, Yeosang decides to plan something a little more..fun for their midday Facetime call.

Tws: Swearing/Foul Language

Sws: Consensual Impact Play (face slaps), Lingerie, Sex Toys (vibrator/butt plug), POV Blowjobs, Exhibitionism, Hair pulling, Handjobs, Face Fucking, Cum Swallowing, Cum Facial, Hickies, Voyeurism, Light Subspace Slipping (if you squint), Gagging, Crying, Drooling, Hints of Dom/Sub Play

Rating: 18+

𝕒𝕦𝕥𝕙𝕠𝕣'𝕤 𝕟𝕠𝕥𝕖:: Hello everyone! It's been a while! I hope all of you have been doing well! Today I present to you a fic that came to my mind in some haze of a dream and something i saw online hehe. I hope you all enjoy it! If you notice any tags that were left out, please message me so I can add them! Thank you!

𝕋𝕒𝕘𝕝𝕚𝕤𝕥 𝕚𝕤 𝕒𝕥 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕓𝕠𝕥𝕥𝕠𝕞. 𝕄𝕖𝕤𝕤𝕒𝕘𝕖 𝕚𝕗 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕨𝕒𝕟𝕥 𝕥𝕠 𝕓𝕖 𝕒𝕕𝕕𝕖𝕕!

As a reminder, my work is only for those who are eighteen years or older. Anyone who attempts to interact with my work or blog who is underage will be blocked immediately. You have been warned.

©𝒅𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒎𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒄𝒆𝒑𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏-𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒍𝒅 2024 || 𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆 𝒅𝒐 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒓𝒆𝒑𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝒐𝒓 𝒖𝒔𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒚 𝒐𝒇 𝒎𝒚 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒌 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒎𝒚 𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒔𝒊𝒐𝒏. 𝑻𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒌 𝒚𝒐𝒖 ♡

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“Can he see me?”

“Mhm, you’re in perfect view.”

“Holy fuck-“

Crouched in the corner of the office bathroom, Hongjoong sunk into a blind spot of the stall with a hand covering his mouth.

This isn’t happening, this can’t be real.

It was normal for Yeosang to call him throughout the day to check on him. He knew that his favorite person in the world was often tense as the day grew on in the office. It wasn’t the worst job in the world to have, but it certainly was Hongjoong’s first choice.

“I know you work so hard, so I’ll try my best to cheer you up any way that I can, okay?”

That was the promise that his adorable boyfriend made to him a couple of months ago, yet he always took care of him even before that.

The calls were meant to be cute, making him laugh or smile— only to keep his mood up until he got back home to spend the rest of his evening with him.

So, imagine his surprise when his phone rang in the middle of the break room and Yeosang stared back at him, legs spread wide and pale fingertips ghosting down his pectorals.

Not to mention he had on some sort of lingerie with baby yellow petals decorating the entirety of it.

That’s how he ended up here, after excusing himself abruptly to take a 20, airpods secured tightly in his burning red ears.

Yeosang let out a short chuckle at his boyfriend’s expression, pulling the collar of the high necked fabric between his teeth. The lace bunched around his semi hard cock, sticking to his tip as he smiled prettily to the camera.

“Why don’t you show him more of what you have?” Seonghwa pushed, biting back a groan from the feverish expression on the brunette’s face as he nodded.

Hongjoong held his phone in a vice grip as Yeosang slowly turned around, ass held high in the air. With a small whimper, Seonghwa’s hand came into frame, pushing the fabric to the side and revealing a toy, encrusted in lavender and maroon misshapen jewels.

“Isn’t it just breathtaking to look at?”

It’s fucking torturous, that’s fucking what. Hongjoong complained to himself, letting out a huff.

How the hell was he meant to survive the rest of the day knowing that his boyfriend is plugged up and looking like that?!

He frustratingly pulled back his sleeve. He has 15 minutes.

Maybe he could leave early, say he had an emergency and has to go home. I mean it would be partially true, though he was sure his boss wouldn’t want to know what kind of “emergency” he was having at the moment.

Or that anybody else in the office would let alone see it.

“B-Baby?” Hongjoong jolted out of his thoughts, guilt overcoming him at Yeosang’s worried eyes.

“I-I’m sorry—”

“N-No, I shouldn’t have tried to do this while you’re at work.” Yeosang’s cheeks flushed, biting the corner of his lips with eyes falling on Seonghwa. Though the office worker couldn’t see it from his position, the eldest looked almost especially guilty.

It was Yeosang’s idea to be a little bit naughty today, but it wouldn’t be fun or enjoyable at Hongjoong’s expense if the man in question couldn’t enjoy it the way that they had intended him to.

Really, it was their fault for not warning him ahead of time, despite it being a surprise.

Just as he was about to hand the phone to Seonghwa, a chill went up his spine at the near sinister laugh that spilled out of his boyfriend. Yeosang snapped his eyes back down to the screen, feeling himself twitch through his lingerie.

Hongjoong merely cocked his head to the side, popping the collar of his shirt. “So then, shouldn’t you get started on it quickly? I only have ten minutes left, Sangie.”

Out of view from the camera, the office man pushed his pants and boxers halfway down his ass, slowly fisting himself off beat. Heated puffs fell from his parted lips as he met Yeosang’s eyes again, smirking at the deer in headlights look he gave back.

“Why are you sitting there? Get to it. Hwa grab the phone from him would, ya? Let me see him get you off.”

The two barely wasted any time with discarding any garments that were in the way before Yeosang made his place on the floor in front of their eldest friend, who kept the camera steady on his face.

Every ounce of the brunette’s body vibrated.

From this position alone was enough to make him feel small, bordering on insignificant, solely for the purpose of bringing his hyung to fruition.

Add the knowledge of his boyfriend eyeing him down, watching his every move with the utmost accuracy and, above all, hearing the sound of him enjoying himself because of him? Yeosang could almost barely contain his eagerness to divulge himself in his lustful desires.

But he has to wait. This is about making Hongjoong feel better. He comes first above all else.

Yeosang locked his eyes on the camera, cupping the front side of his hyung’s cock for the perfect angle of his tongue running up the side. The trail glistened off of the reflection of the lamp, drawing a short groan from Seonghwa and a hum from the speaker of the phone. The corner of his lips curled up, short enough for only Seonghwa to catch the end of it, moving his tongue in circles around the tip.

This is exactly how you like it. Do you like what you see, baby?

“Wah~ Sang really wants to put on a show for you Joong. I wonder how it would feel if his mouth was on you instead of me?” Seonghwa taunted, a deep hum trailing off the end as Yeosang slid him halfway into his mouth.

The weight of his cock on his tongue was damn near intoxicating, mixed in with the smell of his cologne that was all too familiar to him and sweat drove the brunette’s head down further. He let his jaw hang slacked until the tip of his nose barely touched him, constricting his throat and drawing a long low moan from Seonghwa, relenting and slurping noisily back to the tip.

On the other end, Hongjoong let his head rest against the wall tile. Although his pumps were slow and steadied, every small slurp and gag had heavy pants leaving his mouth. Only in a matter of seconds had Yeosang managed to dishevel him, to the point that he almost forgot where he was.

Tucking his phone in between his raised knees, he pulled off his tie completely, folded it over twice, and slotted it into his mouth.

Better for the others to not hear what’s going on, and the subtle reminder that he was still, in fact, at work.

Seonghwa combed his fingers along Yeosang’s scalp towards the back of his head, barely moving the boy’s head back and forth. Yet, the action made Yeosang keen and bob his head for more, ignoring the string of spit that was falling down and dirtying his lingerie. He braced one hand against the bedroom wall, the other gliding up the side of Seonghwa’s thigh. The way they tensed with each subtle roll of his hips had his fingers trembling, swallowing around him with every touch to the back of his throat.

“Mm~, Mmmm”

“So messy~” His voice dripped with lust and want, using his free hand to smear some of the drool up his face onto his cheek, all before planting a small, yet firm clap to the side of his cheek, reveling in the constriction of Yeosang’s throat from the slap. He met his hyung with wide eyes, a keen unexpectedly rumbling from him. Instead of teasing him, Seonghwa broadened his stance, sending a small apology to Hongjoong through the phone as he placed the camera down on the side table.

He oh so conveniently made sure the camera was angled downward, obscuring Seonghwa’s upper body. Though his groans drew out deeper than his own, Hongjoong’s mind had already slipped, imagining himself in the taller boy’s place.

Those doe eyes staring up at him, completely at his will and running his tongue along every place that would egg him on to fuck his throat harder, deeper, faster.

He was so good to him. So, so good.

“You want more, baby? Take it, I know you can.” Seonghwa’s voice blended into his own in his head, using the leverage of his precum to jack himself off faster, moaning desperately into his tie.

On command, Yeosang kept himself completely still and at the will of Seonghwa’s dick pistoning off beat down his throat. The firmness of his large hands on the side of his head sent a delicious pleasure down to his cock and a blur through his head. The further he brought him down, every inch of veins that his tongue managed to touch had Yeosang a moaning mess.

So..good~

I feel so good~

Can he feel it? Can he feel how good I feel~?

“Do you see how good he looks, Joong?” Seonghwa gritted out with his eyes trained on Yeosang’s face, though he was sure that the boy was barely with them.

He lacked complete regard for his appearance, tears streaming slowly and freely down his face mixing in with the small amount of makeup that was left over. The bottom of his skirt had become a mess, having been moved to the side at some point, along with the fabric that kept the brunette’s dick in place. Without being asked or told, he jerked himself off in intervals, cocking his head to the side when Seonghwa’s thighs began to tremble.

“Y-Yeo you better not cum before we do or you’ll be feeling your punishment all day tomorrow.” Hongjoong feebly tried to threaten after removing the tie from between his teeth, though the quiver in his voice as he edged closer defied him. He didn’t bother to correct himself, only noticing that he was five minutes past his break time.

Incoming text message: Joong, where the hell are you? Our meeting is starting in five minutes!

Yeosang’s lips curled up into a smirk as much as they possibly could, mouth hanging open to curl against the underside of Seonghwa’s cock in a “come hither” motion. Seonghwa cursed under his breath, pushing the brunette’s sweat slicked bangs back with a vice as pearls of cum shot onto Yeosang’s tongue, lips and a small droplet curling down his chin.

Once he was completely spent, he loosened his grip onto Yeosang, the boy’s head falling to the side cutely in contrast with lustful, yet doe eyes holding contact and tongue lazily dragging against his slit. Seonghwa reached for the camera, angling it down as Yeosang stuck his tongue out to show his prize.

Sealing the deal, his fingers curled around the base of the tall man’s cock, pumping one last small pearl out onto the tongue and giving the tip one last kitten lick. A wicked smile crossed his face, blowing a light pulse of cold air on it.

“F-Fuck!” Hongjoong’s lower body jerked, cum drooling all over his wrist. He gritted his teeth at the small amount that got onto his pants, but quickly had to ignore it as he tried to recollect himself.

A few minutes later, he stood to his feet, adjusting his tie and making sure his blazer fell low enough to cover his sweat stained and clearly white freckled side of his slacks. Yeosang had made himself comfortable against Seonghwa’s chest, with the eldest drawing close mouthed figure eights on the dip in his neck with his tongue.

He bit the inside of his lip, knowing better than to let any noise slip out of him. It didn’t fucking help that Seonghwa clearly had other plans, adding on to his already torturous actions by twisting the plug leisurely in and out of him.

“I might have to stay a bit late tonight, Yeo.” Hongjoong slid the lock open to the stall, checking himself in the mirror. Yeosang’s whine came out louder than expected, Seonghwa humming as he bit down on the side of his neck, leaving a small dark mark. The brunette’s lips pressed together instantly when met with a sharp look from his boyfriend.

“You can take care of him well, right Hwa?”

The taller male’s fingers curled around the base of Yeosang’s chin, having a good look over him to make sure that he was still present enough to continue before firming his hold, tongue slipping out to lick the corner of his mouth. Yeosang’s hips jerked up from the naughty hand caressing his inner thigh.

“Of course. He deserves only the best.”

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𝕥𝕒𝕘𝕝𝕚𝕤𝕥: @atiny-piratequeen @little-lazuli @atiny-dazzlinglight @kimnamshiks

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#ateez fic #ateez smut #hongjoong smut #seonghwa smut #yeosang smut #kpop smut #kira kira

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imrllytootiredforthis · 9 months

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So I have a question, and I hope you don't take offence or possibly miss my genuine curiosity in this? You write about dom!reader x members (which is fucking hot and the only reason I follow you cause its that good) but I have to ask, how do you picture fucking them? Like, is it with a strap on? Or maybe a transgender reader? I just wanna know so that I understand how to see myself when I'm getting lost in your fics.

Thank you <3

Hi anon, no offense at all from my end!!

I actually really liked this question because it made me look at myself as a writer, and also just as a person and the things that i'm into,

Before I say anything though, you yourself can read it however you want. I think that’s part of the beauty of sharing your writing, letting people have their own interpretations and views on what you write.

I want my writing to be inclusive to everyone, which is why most (not all but most of my newer-ish) fics that aren’t requested are attempted to be written with that in mind.

But if you really do wanna know what I imagine, it’s a bit harder to explain because it’s shifted so much over the time that I’ve had this blog and from a day-to-day basis as well.

When I first posted on this blog, nearly a year ago last October (crazy how long it’s been) I would’ve definitely said I imagined it as a reader with a strap but at the time i was using she/her pronouns 99% of the time and was only kind of questioning my gender identity. Now, however I use any on here because I don’t feel like any fit me for the majority of the time, it’s shifting and changing with the day and feeling.

Even now I can’t pin down one to tell you for certain because there isn’t one way I only think when I’m writing. Sometimes I imagine the reader with a strap and fem presenting or with a strap and gender neutral completely, I imagine a trans reader-amab or afab with a strap or without. I imagine a male reader too sometimes, or female reader with a dick because it’s fiction and why the hell not.

A dick is a dick and if I wanna write a fan fiction where I have a pretty boy drooling over mine then I’m gonna write it no matter if I don’t have a real one (sadly, but we’re not gonna get into that right now)

I write pegging/fucking w a reader w a dick more often because i am a little bit uncomfortable writing where the reader is being penetrated and find it hot as hell (to say it frankly) for the reader to be doing the penetrating instead.

I project any and (mostly) all of my fantasies onto this blog and those have few bounds so honestly I couldn’t tell you

So, sorry anon, for making you read this all to give you a bullshit, on the fence answer but that’s what I got right now!😅

#inbox💌#cy's ramblings✰#if other writer's feel this way too i'd love to hear about it #cause i feel a little weird posting this rn🧍

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pinkhairandpokemon · 6 months

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[Attached: A link to a blog post made by a user called “casteliantruthseeker”.]

Reshiram Gone Rogue? The TRUTH Behind Route 14 Forest Fire

“As most Unovan trainers and civilians were likely alerted by their Rotom-Phones or X-Transceivers at the time of the event, a ginormous wild fire suddenly ravaged the forests surrounding Route 14 yesterday, laying utter waste to the landscape. Even as I type, rangers are doing everything they can to keep it from spreading to the nearby town. Everyone is speculating on how this travesty might’ve even started to begin with- many are assuming it was just irresponsible campers leaving their fire unattended, or trainers going a bit too all out in battle with a Fire-type, but today I’m here to give you all the REALITY of what actually caused it all!

Several eye-witness reports who were at the scene have shared some claims that sound outlandish at first glance- that the legendary dragon and embodiment of Truth itself was THERE at the scene. That’s right, RESHIRAM. One person even said they saw it soaring over the catastrophe, cloaked in its sacred flames and reveling in the mass destruction it’d brought down upon the land.

I can already tell you’re thinking, “what? Reshiram would never! It’s one of Unova’s divine protectors, and it even has a trainer!” To which I respond, let me give you a moment to remember who exactly that trainer is.

Ex-Galar Champion Blake, who- as you all likely recall- was the trainer who lead the region’s Gym Leader’s retaliation against Team Plasma’s siege on the Pokémon League two years ago. Some- heck, the majority of people- view their actions against the so-called “criminal organization” as heroic, but I ask you to look at yesterday’s events and question if that was really the case. Was it really an act with Unova’s best interest in mind, or was it just a result of the League’s corrupt nature seeking to snuff out any who dared hold different views and morals than them? So much so that they even sought out a god to help carry out their assault?!

Now, I’m not saying Team Plasma was without fault- they did recruit the other legendary dragon to their cause as well, after all, and caused a mass panic with that whole castle thing. But just think about it for a moment- one dragon was simply responding to the desperate hearts of people passionate enough to make a much needed change in the world, while the other was sought out and forced to work alongside the region’s most powerful trainers, all for the sake of squashing out some “troublemakers”- AKA people who were doing nothing but fighting for what they believed in.

Now that I have you all questioning who was really the “hero” that historical day, let me turn your attention back to yesterday’s events. You’ve probably heard that in the past month, a group claiming to be the revived Team Plasma have begun to make their activity known throughout Unova. Not long before all of this, Reshiram and its renowned trainer were spotted in Castelia City. A pretty coincidental time for the savior of Unova to return, huh?

And now we’re here, with a burning forest and a legendary dragon on the loose. What exactly am I getting at here, you ask? Well, it’s quite simple- BLAKE is nor was ever the “hero of Unova” you all make them out to be. Remember how they were also the one to stop both the emergencies in Galar and Kalos, right? And when you really think about it, Team Plasma was just trying to STOP catastrophes like those from happening ever again. Separation from Pokémon = no one able to abuse their power for nefarious schemes. From my perspective? It seems like Blake had let all the attention and praise from their great feats go to their head, so much so that they attacked Plasma- the ones who were ACTUALLY trying to save the world- just to add more to their name. And of course, because they had the League backing them up, they were painted as the good guy, while no one in Unova even bothered to question if Plasma’s ideas held any water! Because if the League and goodhearted trainers like Blake oppose it, then surely it’s bad, right?

And today, Blake and their arsonist dragon are back while Plasma is at large in the region once more. To crush them once again, I bet, and then go and gloat their heroic efforts to the world. But clearly, Plasma isn’t the main threat here- their operation is nowhere near as big as it once was. Today they’d just be considered a band of petty street criminals at worst! While here we blatantly see the hero of truth, abusing their title and razing wildlife to the ground.

So, what do I say needs to be done about all this? I say that this pink-haired menace needs to be brought into custody, thoroughly questioned, and have Reshiram confiscated from their person- while this time we as Unovans not make the same mistake of turning our heads away from Plasma again. At the end of the day, they are just people who want to fix the wrongdoings in the world and make it better for all of us- who are we to ostracize them when we could just hear them out instead? Liberating our Pokémon may sound uncomfortable, but think of all the crimes humanity have abused these wonderful creatures to commit, and ask yourself- is there really any other way to prevent it? Maybe Pokémon liberation isn’t the answer, but we’ll never know for sure if we jump to immediate punishment for the ones who preach it.”

———

The fuck is this Plasma sympathizer conspiracy theory bullshit that popped up on my dash today. Why is this how I hear about the wildfire. I’m not even Unovan and I’m unbelievably pissed off.

I looked into it more and there is no actual confirmation of Reshiram being present at the scene. Yes, there were a few claiming to have seen it, but not enough to be all that significant? Fuck is this loser on about.

Goddammit, I just wish Blake would answer their fucking texts so we could at least know they’re okay. It’s been over a month…

-Auberi

#interlude arc #drama stakes pokeblogging #(( I guess ))#pokeblogging #pokemon irl #pokeblog rp #pokemon #pokemon oc #pokemon rp #trainer blake #rival auberi

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nvr-pass · 1 year

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actually re: my tags on my previous post bc i remembered this is my blog and i can monologue about whatever pretentious shit i want. i think part of my bewilderment at these people is bc my media behaviour is so antithetical to this happening. here's an essay or w/e ..

basically, i read blake snyder's save the cat a couple years ago (interesting, if you read it with a huge grain of salt) and he talks about the importance of taglines. he's says that people will only decide to see your movie based on a single sentence and poster the cinema/magazine provides about your movie, so it's important to make sure to communicate your hook and set up the correct expectations in your audience in just that little impression they will get. that's what they will decide on to see your movie and that's what will dictate how the think about it beginning to end.

synder's only thinking in the specific milieu and time he wrote his screenplays for, but i think he was onto something with the huge impact of what your audience thinks the movie will be beforehand. if the audience somehow gets the wrong impression before the movie even started, there's a good chance they will hate your movie, regardless of its actual quality. (q.e.d. those reviews i made fun of.)

like i said, synder's view on the issue is very limited, but you've always had to have heard of a piece of media somehow. something, somewhere brought you to it and what exactly it was that got you interested has a huge (often subconscious) impact on what you will think of it. there has to be a reason why you think it will interest you.

there are no more tv guides that dictate our cinema night, but there sure are trailers and reviews and promotion posts and whatever our friend tell us. it's still very much happening.

and i dislike it. i really dislike knowing half the movie from the trailer alone. i dislike the entire set-up of the movie being incredibly boring because i already know what will happen from a 5 second snippet in the trailer. and this doesn't make the movie unenjoyable (unless it's really really bad) because there is loads of enjoyment to be found it stories that you already know (see any popular shakespeare play. im not watching them bc i want to know the plot!). but i still wonder how i often i actually watch a movie i know nothing about. how often im watching them like the makers thought i would, being introduced to every element only as it appears.

ever since, i've made an actual effort to know as little about a piece of media as possible before experiencing it. i've still managed to find stuff i like, often through obscure tumblr posting by users i know share the same taste in media as me. and sometimes through sheer luck and curiosity like clicking on random youtube recommendations of musical bootlegs.

and i am by now means saying that this is the superior media experience! i watched heathers, thinking it would be like highschool musical during act 1 and then i was gutted. i loved it. but there are very good reasons why heathers should have appropriate content warnings and i would not recommend it to others without mentioning the murder (or knowing the other person very very well). knowingly avoiding content indicators is born from the privilege of being okay to see all fictional content there could be and being open to any genre. it works for me because i enjoy it and find it interesting this way.

i just often think about how differently we all experience the same piece of media, not just from our internal bias but also from the trivial fact of how we heard of it and what we already know or expect from it.

i also made the experience that not knowing what a piece of media's strength is supposed to be leaves me open to appreciate any strength i find. this often has to do with genre expectations: for example i don't care if the plot of an action movie is stupid if the action scenes are cool, and i don't care if the action scenes in a romantic comedy are silly if the relationships are interesting etc. that's not what these movies are about! i find that when i don't know what my genre expectations are supposed to be im very forgiving to any flaws or weaknesses bc im assuming that that's probably not what it is about and that's okay. i try to find what it is about and what they were trying to do and i value it for whatever it does manage well.

i notice this a lot with with people watching a movie from a genre they are not familiar with. im thinking especially western audiences watching asian cinema. it operates by completely different rules because it's its own culture and idustry and often gets dragged (very very unfairly) for being "cheap". this is purely bc said audience is expecting and judging things that the makers of these movies or shows obviously never thought were the most important. and if you impose onto these movies that these things should be the most important and should be done a certain way, then that might be your own valid interpretation of whatever, but i think it's your own fault if you didn't like it.

trying to understand media while being cautious about whatever expectations you impose upon it can really make you enjoy movies so much more without having to compromise your annoying(affectionate) overanalyzing. trust me. open your mind, step into the light. bad movies can have earnest attempts to convey something if your willing to look kindly. picking it apart will be much more fun if you're trying to locate the little kernel that did work and trying to find why it worked and what its pitwalls were and how they could've been avoided.

anyways i lied this wasn't an essay it was just a ramble about media approaches. feel free to leave a comment of any length if you have any thoughts on this :^)

#cebo talks #at length

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goose-creations · 2 years

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A little bit more Info. (Of the Personal Sorts)

Hello! So, I recently reblogged a post about schizophrenia and I wanted to talk about my experiences with it w/o taking over the original post, which can be found here

https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/goose-creations/690505366787751936?source=share

For myself personally, I've only been diagnosed for about six years (When I had turned 19) but I've been dealing with the symptoms for a lot longer, since about third grade (About 8-9, give or take)

For me, I thought that it was very normal to hear voices and see things that weren't there. I thought that everyone did honestly. It was only later that I realized that not everyone heard and saw what I did, but we'll get to that at another time.

For the seeing part, it's usually shadowy figures or bright flashes of color where there wouldn't

This next part might be Triggering for some readers so Imma bold it and when it turns back to normal, it should be safe again.

When my emotions are a riot, so's my symptoms. Puberty was like hell. The constant ups and downs made me hate myself, which fed into the voices.

For me, I heard my parents tell me to kill myself. The voices fed into my darkest fears and made me nearly do it. They'd call me a coward each day I went on but at the same time, I'm a stubborn bitch so I felt like there had to be something going on here. Eventually I did tell someone I trusted very much and he told me that I'm one of the bravest people that he's ever known.

Now we should be done with the bad stuff.

A few weeks later we found me a psychiatrist and a therapist (which sounds amazingly simple but it was not, lemme tell you, it was not.) and I was diagnosed with Schizophrenia, it was about four years ago that the -affective disorder was added on.

It's been a few years with its ups and downs. While I still see things, (Slenderman standing in the corner of a room, the Among Us dudes dancing on peoples heads, Auras, etc.) I do have a vivid imagination which helps me make art and as for the hearing things, well I still hear what I talked about earlier buuuutttt it has also developed into me A) having something called an Echoic Memory (I hear something, my brain decides it likes it and it replays for a while. Ex. Morgan Freeman saying "tiddy sprinkles") and B) something called Foreign Accent Syndrome which I don't really understand but Google tells me that I slip into accents bc I'm trying to be friendly and it's a sign of Autism? (If someone else can explain, what would be great)

Either way, I wouldn't be me without my 'disability' (I'm high functioning, what can I say) In a way, it's my superpower and my kryptonite. It's lead me to love and hate myself and learn to accept things about me and others over the years.

All of this can boil down to...

STOP DEMONIZING MENTAL ILLNESSES YOU JACKASSES!!! WE GOT EMOUGH PROBLEMS ALREADY!!! JFC..

If you did, thanks for reading it all the way. Even if you didn't, still, thanks.

#schizophrenia #schizoaffective #personal post

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cupidlakes · 3 years

Text

if you think george is just some guy then good for you frankly i don’t care and most importantly i don’t like ppl making assumptions about me as a person based off the content i post on this blog which is such a small part of my life that you see

you can enjoy cc’s without it crossing over into smth parasocial while it’s smth to be aware of (and i am) i personally assure that i have balance in my life and again i’m just tired of anyone acting like i don’t, you don’t know me. if you think anything i post is overwhelming i genuinely urge you to unfollow/block!! but i hate the idea that it reflects negatively on me when i know myself

#also #EVERYONE IS JUST SOME GUY!!????#like what’s your point #do you want me to touch grass for being a fan or something #it’s weird actually that it feels like ppl assume certain things abt me #when i know i have a good balance in my life (because it’s important to me)#and it doesn’t revolve around mcyters as much as it seems so for some reason just because i post #semi-regularly on a dedicated blog #like i am a pretty normal well adjusted person i go to my job #hang out w my friends irl talk to my wonderful friends online and indulge in my hobbies #i also Have other interests i have views!!!!#i just happen to talk abt a cc i like in my spare time #i’m not obsessively trying to look for his personal info i’m not forking over all my savings to him #like what’s the deal #i don’t rely on the cc’s i watch for happiness (as much as i might’ve a few years ago and my personal growth and #appreciation for life outside of my interests is also important to me)#like really i don’t know how else to put it #i’m just Prone to rambling #so if that’s why it seems like i can say a million things about george that’s why #and i don’t put him on any sort of pedastool?#all i have is an appreciation for his seeming genuineness and good track record i actually don’t think any of my favourite cc’s are #unproblematic i know they aren’t.#because they’re just people #and i’ve agreed time again that no one should be put on a pedastool esp cc’s we’re all fallible and prone to mistakes #i got an ask that was The tipping point i’m sorry #because usually i ignore all negativity #it’s just upsetting #to delete #negativity #cw negativity

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cas-rivaille · 3 years

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HELLO, DEAR!

Undertaker here! How are you today?

I was thinking the other day and I remembered an idea of mine I requested some time ago to another blog and I wanted to see your point of view as well, if you're comfortable with it ofc! I'll change it a bit because I have more ideas about it than before.

What if, hear me out, Obey me!MC was Sukuna's vessel??

I was thinking about a Female!MC but if you want you can keep them gender neutral (I don't mind!). So let's get into it, shall we?

Some facts about MC before the Devildom:

- They've already eaten all Sukuna's fingers

-But they are able to keep him calm inside themselves because over the year they've been together, MC decided to approach him more (Ya know if you have to die with/for someone, at least know them better)

-Sukuna took a liking to the MC, even though he would never admit it. (I mean- They always visit him in his domain to talk to him, read together, play cards (yes. You heard me. The king of curses loves Poker and UNO) or chess, they always ask him where would he like to go eat something, offer him some of their food to let him try new things, ect. Sometimes, but only SOMETIMES, they let him take control (not fully but they both can talk from the same mouth and he has control over one side, while MC has control over the other one))

- Having said that, Sukuna's still a stinky sassy bastard King. He's still rude, acts like he doesn't care about them and always finds a way to let them down when they're too happy. If they're sad though, he doesn't hurt them more. Sometimes MC even asks him advice whenever they're in doubt and after his bulling he actually gives pretty good advice (if you consider extreme violence a good advice that is)

Anyway, MC was going to get executed when suddenly they fell into Devildom. Their file didn't mention Sukuna at all and MC noticed that because when they arrived covered in talismans and chains the demons were confused about it. So, they kept the King a secret until lesson 16.

After Belphegor's crushing hug, while MC (the one from the original timeline) is in Mammon's arm, before Barbatos Thanoses the other timeline, Sukuna heals them and takes fully control of their body (the tattoos, the fangs, the long black claws, the other pairs of eyes and arms appear).

Now, HOW would the brothers, Diavolo and Barbatos react?

If it is too much or I did something wrong, feel free to ignore this! It's okay! Love you and have a good day!

OH MY GOD ?? THIS IS FANTASTIC THANK YOU OMG !

(i think i'm gonna do it hc style for the individual characters feelings but also some dialogue n stuff and each hc thing for each character is written as like in the game like they all like MC except belphie for obvious reasons)

tags: swearing, lesson uhhh smth spoilers ?? i think like 16 ?? (lmk if i need to tag anything else)

also hi ‘taker🥺🥺 i’m good today,, had a bit of a rough morning but i got to see my partner so i feel better !! how are you ? :D

and without further ado..

MC who is Sukuna's Vessel

- hold up

- hold the fuck up

- it was confusing enough when there were two MCs and one of them was near death in mammon's arms

- but now the injured MC gets healed and comes back to life ? but has another set of arms and eyes and is covered in strange tattoos ?

- then the other MC disappears ?

- when the demon MC starts talking, their voice is different and what-

"What the fuck did you to do MC?" Sukuna hastily spits out, checking the body for any other injuries. MC's voice is back and talking out of the same mouth.

"Sukuna, stand down," MC says.

"But he almost killed you ! Without me we wouldn't be standing here right now !" Sukuna argues back.

"I'm aware of that, but we have to be civil about this and talk to them," MC responds sternly.

"Then I want to be present for it. I'm not letting anything happen to you- I mean me. Yes me because I die if you die and I'm too godly to die," Sukuna rambles out before retracting the other set of arms but leaving the tattoos. He opens one of the eyes and forms a mouth on MC's right cheek to watch and participate in the conversation.

All the brothers and Divolo looked stunned at the scene that just happened.

"Questions ?" MC jokingly asks.

Lucifer -

- what ?

- questions ? is MC joking ?

- who the fuck is talking out of MCs body and what jurisdiction does he have

- isnt MC supposed to be human ??

- what does this mean for their relationship ?

- why did MC keep it from him ?

- he looks at dia and barbatos with the most confused face

- looks back at MC equally confused

- def hurts his pride that he didn't know

"Explain"

Lucifer's confusion turns to anger because that's the only way he knows how to cope/react to this.

Sukuna starts talking.

"Show a little more respect. I'm a king after all."

"Don't be an ass," MC shoots back. MC looks at Lucifer a little embarrassed.

"Uh, so this is Sukuna. He's the king of curses ? We kind of share a body because... uhh... it's a very long story but i mean the gist of it is I ate his thousand year old fingers ? There was 20 of them because he had two sets of arms like you saw before- it was very gross- but i had to because of the energy they posses ? When you brought me here and I was covered in seals and chains, was when I was about to be executed because I have all of Sukuna in me. So,, he can do stuff like heal my body and give me cool powers ? I don't really know what else to say." MC rambles using awkward hand motions and finishes by scratching the back of their head.

"Way to make me sound like a total fucking loser," Sukuna glares at MC.

"For the love of god stop talking-" MC shoots back.

Mammon

- huh ? someone has been sharing a body with his MC the whole time ?

- were they present the whole time ?

- did they see him acting like an idiot in love ?

- was sukuna there during e v e r y conversation he's ever had w them

- never felt more insecure and betrayed tbh

- why wouldn't you tell him ? he was your first

</3

- wants you all to himself

- doesn't want to share you with some four armed idiot

"So he's just, there all the time ?" Mammon asks.

"Not really? He has a headspace and he usually just chills in there but he can watch what's going on if he wants to." MC responds.

"That makes me sound lazy," Sukuna complains.

"Well if you don't like how I describe you then maybe you can talk about yourself. You're very good at it," MC smirks.

"Fine. I can do whatever I want. We can trade who has control over MC's body. I have a large supply of cursed energy and will beat the shit out of the next person who touches MC," Sukuna glares at Belphie.

"Yeah beat them in poker maybe. But not mariokart. You suck at video games in the headspace," MC laughs.

Leviathan

- was that how MC was so good at video games ?

- because they spent hours on end with this guy in their head playing video games ?

- why didn't MC come to him to play games ?

- why is MC okay with sharing a body with Sukuna ?

- why can he be the one to share a body with MC ?

- why was MC playing video games with literally anyone else ?

"So let me get this straight, you are his fingers and now you share a body ? How does that even work ? That sounds like something out of the manga 'My best friend ate some ancient object and now shares a body with an immortal warrior'" Levi questions MC.

"Okay so, Sukuna lived a really long time ago. When he died, the only thing that survived were his fingers. They each hold an incredible amount of cursed energy and it's only his fingers so from there you can imagine how powerful he was with the rest of his body," MC explains.

"Okay but that doesn't tell me why you ate the fingers ?" Levi raises an eyebrow.

"Oh. So I went to a high school for Jujutsu sorcerers, which are people who can manipulate cursed energy, and once I ate the first one to save my friend from dying, my choices were to die now or eat all of Sukuna and then be executed because he would die with me," MC says as if them dying was nothing.

Satan

- why has he never heard about Sukuna in any of the books he's read ?

- he historically doesn't exist in anything the devildom has book-wise

- so who is he ?

- needs to find out everything he can about him

- is there a way to separate MC and Sukuna ?

- his blood is boiling at the thought of MC sharing a body with someone

"So you've basically had super human powers this entire time and elected to not tell us ?" Satan glares at MC.

"Well, when you put it like that it sounds bad. I just didn't want you all to meet Sukuna because he has a lot of anger issues and is quite an asshole and I was trying to avoid this entire conversation that is happening," MC sighs.

"Rude," Sukuna says.

"Anger issues. You think we couldn't deal with this ? Are you serious right now ?" Satan asks.

MC shrugs their shoulders nervously.

"How much do you actually know about what sharing a body with him does to you ?" Satan asks while looking at the small mouth and glaring.

"I mean, I get these marks because he had them when he was alive. He was also so powerful to the point he had four arms and another set of eyes, like you saw before. I get those when he takes over mostly, but I can kee him restrained. But the eye thing is why I've always had slits under my eyes because the eyes are the most common thing to show up. The arms don't really. But it's entirely painless so don't worry," MC somewhat calmly explains.

Asmodeus

- those marks make MC look so good wtf-

- not the time

- so this Sukuna person lived a thousand years ago ?

- what was this about jujutsu sorcery ?

- what even is that ?

- asmos not the brightest on the block but from the looks on his brothers faces none of them know what the fuck MC is talking about either.

- they've explained a little bit of it b there's still some missing info

- what is sharing a body really like

- how much of MCs body can change to be like Sukunas ?

"So how much of your body can he control ? What can he heal ? Could he bring you back from the dead ?" Asmo curiously asks.

"He can't control much because it's my body and I have a lot of raw power by myself. I don't know if he can bring us back from the dead. I don't think so though or else the Jujutsu school wouldn't have tried to execute me. He used to be able to bring us back when I hadn't eaten all of his fingers, but now I don't think he can," MC explains.

"So why do you let him live in your body if he can't do much for you ?" Asmo questions.

"Well one, I don't think there's a way to get him out-"

"I'm still here you know," Sukuna interrupts.

"You've made that clear," MC says before continuing, "And two he can do stuff for me. It's like a symbiotic relationship. I give him a host and he protects me."

Beelzebub

- protects MC ?

- that's his job

- why is someone else protecting MC ?

- overall confusion

- even tho MC has gone over it multiple times, he doesn't get how or why Sukuna is in MC's body

- maybe it's the shock

. was this why MC could challenge him to armwrestling and almost win ?

"So how long has he been in you ?" Beel asks.

"About a year," MC responds.

"Can he make you live longer aside from healing you ?" Beel asks hopefully.

"I'm sorry, I don't think so..." MC says while looking at the ground. They cross their arms. They look small, as if they aren't small enough compared to him already.

"So, what does this mean ? Now that your secret is out... are you going to stay in the devildom with us ? Or do you have to leave ?"

" If I leave I'll surely be executed when I go back to the human world. If I stay I don't know what will happen to me, but it's not up to me. It's up to you guys if you want me to stay. I understand if you want me to go, I was harboring a big secret and it's probably unnerving to know that you're never truly alone with me, but Sukuna actually cares about my boundaries even though he acts like he doesn't. There are some pluses and there are some drawbacks but ultimately you have to decide." MC responds, looking from brother to brother then at Dia and Barbatos

Belphie

- MC ? dead if you back to the human world ? doesn't bother him

- he doesn't care

- he hasn't known MC long enough to care

- diavolo may have told everyone that MC was a descendant of human Lilith and he told everyone the events that actually happened, but why should he have any attachment to MC

- MC isnt Lilith, and MC sure as hell doesn't like him after the events that happened today

- from what he's heard, MC dying would be good for the human world

"I say send MC back. What happens to them isnt our problem any more," Belphie says while under his magical restraints Diavolo put on him.

"Of course you would say that," Satan glares at him.

"Shut up Belphie !!" Mammon and Levi yell.

"You don't have any right to an opinion in this matter." Lucifer states.

"Belphie that's mean," Asmo says.

Beel frowns.

"I vote they stay. I like MC regardless, and if all I have to do is adjust to Sukuna then I'll do it," Beel says while looking Belphie dead in the eye.

There's a beat of silence.

"Me too," Mammon says.

"Hey ! I was going to say that !" Levi protests.

"Oooh~ Count me in !" Asmo says with a smile.

"I also think they should stay," Satan says and looks at MC.

"My personal preference is also that they stay, but Lord Diavolo it's up to you," Lucifer says and looks at Dia.

Diavolo

- he knew there was something off, but couldnt place his finger on it

- he also constantly got a powerful vibe from MC and this explains it

- he was very fond of MC and enjoyed their presence

- he knew what he was going to do

"Barbatos, what do you think ?" Dia asks him.

"The decision is up to you m'lord," Barbatos responds.

"Well Id also like the input of my trusty all knowing butler," Diavolo laughs.

"Then, I see no reason to send them back to the human world. They can live out their lives here and safe from the school that wants to execute them. It also wouldn't be an issue to get anyone from the human world here if MC so desired," Barbatos replied.

"Then it's settled ! Welcome to the devildom for the rest of your life MC!!" Diavolo smiled and welcomed MC with open arms.

MC smiled and accepted the hug.

Barbatos

- he didn't know all along, but he know when the timelines crossed and he had to erase the other

- MC was very near and dear to his heart though and he wasnt about to let them be killed

- just wants to keep MC safe

I HOPE I DID A GOOD JOB AND THANK YOU FOR THE REQUEST REMEMBER TO FRINK SOME WATER ILY TAKER <3

- mars :)

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themoonwheniamlost · 3 years

Text

Last post I ever want to make about this @/lgbtmazight situation

Please do not harass anyone, no matter what their stance on this is. Please be kind to each other and to yourselves.

Here is a link to the original Post, Here is a link to a great focus/framing statement.

In this post, I’m gonna talk about a few things that I think need context, and then I never want to talk about this again. Okay? Ok.

1. Anyone who is using this situation to try and gain clout/respectability points needs to sit down and shut up. No one should be aiming for recognition. Saying “This needs to go viral/I was right all along,” is very unhelpful. If you were hurt by Len you definitely deserve an apology. But please stop trying to accrue brownie points over this discourse.

2. To the people defending Len. Please stop framing that post as a doxxing attempt. The content from that post is all things that Len made publicly available on the internet. Instead of saying “They pulled up tweets from ten years ago.” What should concern us is that for over ten years, Len has shown a documented history of holding dangerous and hateful political views and has constantly lied about different aspects of their identity.

What we should be focused on is the people that Len has hurt and the ways Len has misled our community. The only person who should be defending Len is Len. Speaking of,

3. Re- the subject of the silence of big blogs/ A new Discord server.

A few days ago, I was invited to be a part of a small discord group that was dedicated to “nuanced discussions and recreating the inviting spirit of the TOG fandom” from last summer. I accepted and was surprised to see some of the biggest names in fandom.

Four days ago the mods put out an announcement that a post had been made about one of their mods and that ALL of the accusations were false. And they then asked everyone in the server not to engage with the post at all. I didn’t even see the post until someone sent it to me directly.

The mods framed this call for silence as a way to keep Len and her family safe. As if anyone engaging with the post was directly putting Len in danger, rather than to face the fact Len was the person who put that much personal information online.

The mods in this discord did not allow for any discussion about this situation in the general server. So anyone who was concerned or had questions had to go directly and separately to the mods. How then do we know who has the same concerns as us? You don’t. In this server, a culture of silence has allowed Lens Closest Mutuals (a group of mostly white women) to act as a PR team that fields any and all concerns from people in the server.

The mods assured me that Len had done video calls with them and showed proper “documentation of their family,” to prove that Len is who she says she is. Which version of Len, is who she says she is? No one answered this question.

When I expressed my concerns to the mods, I got a stock response filled with defections, straw man arguments, red herrings as well as various statements that appealed to moral superiority and conflated separate identity terms all at once. I argued against all of their points and the response that I got was that if I was going to continue “not seeing eye to eye about the need for Len’s safety,” then I would be removed from the group.

I removed myself. I won’t ever stay in a group where one person's mental health is put on a pedestal above all the ways they have hurt and wronged others.

3.A - Please be wary of these White and White-passing women talking about what is and isn't racist. The people who claim that these accusations against Len will drive PoC out of fandom. As a whole ass Black and Indigenous woman, NO. What pushes PoC out of fandom is allowing people w/o racialized lived experiences to be the arbitrators of whether or not something is racist.

4. If an argument is made in bad faith but turns out to be true, it doesn’t mean that the accused should get away with everything just because someone accused them with ill intent. In this case, intent means nothing. Len has lied and holds terrible views. The end.

5. Race, Ethnicity, nationality, familial origin, religious background, class, and cultural upbringing are all different aspects of identity. Over the last ten years, Len has a documented history of lying about ALL OF THESE ASPECTS.

6. No one hates Len for being White-passing. However, you cannot be White-passing and “constantly racialized” at the same time. That's not possible because Race is what is read onto your body. If you are Read as White, and if you are allowed to exist in White spaces, you are not racialized. So which narrative is true?

7. I think that the aspect of race is one of the least important things in this to focus on. Len is a genocide denier, steals aspects of different religions, cultures, and lived experiences as their own. On top of this Len has made themselves a pillar/authority in TOG fandom while constantly lying to all of us, causing harm and posing as the authority on all things Maghrebi.

8. This news has already upset the fandom's past and present in ways we can't go back from. I know I personally feel really guilty for having ever followed this person. But again, the only person responsible for Len’s actions is Len. I'm simply dedicated to being more discerning in the future.

I know that a lot of us are angry. But I think there are ways for us to be angry and still kind. We have learned that someone close to us holds hateful views, but we don't have to act in hatred.

It goes back to the source material that brought us together right? In a terrible situation, we can still do some good. Still build bonds in honesty and nuance. Maybe I’m being naive, but I want to believe that our fandom can grow from this.

We're about to get a sequel! Let's get rid of the bad and move forward as a community. "Shit, Let's start a band."

#lgbtmazight #em look away #fandom discourse #racefaker #tw antisemitism #I hate that I'm still thinking about this #But I needed to get these words out of my head.#if anyone wants a safe place to talk my inbox is open.#please be kind to yourselves #the old guard

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photosworthseeing · 3 years

Photo

Blog recommendation of the month - Interview

https://hammadichakouath.tumblr.com/

1. When and how did you start to become interested in photography?

I have always had a big interest in Photography, especially Black and White Photography because I think B&W photographs have a soul and will never die, they are able to cross the ages. That's why it is so unique and the main characteristic of my work. I remember, I used to visit Magnum Photos's website almost everyday to look at the pictures, I really enjoyed looking at the portraits and documentary photography. Two of my favourite portrait photographers are Philippe Halsman and Steve McCurry.

I started taking photos about ten years ago when I got a camera as a gift from my brother, thought it was only a basic digital camera, but i didn't mind and just started creating my own photos and apparently I came to like it very much. To me photography is a creative way to express myself and my feelings.

2. How would you say your photography changed since you started?

When I first began photography, most of my photos were merely street photos or photos taken on the sly. Gradually I became interested in photography in general: Portraiture, Long Exposure, Landscape, and so on. On the top of this, I came into Analog Photography to complete my education. As an open-minded, curious person, who promotes diversity, I couldn't limit myself to only one style of photography. I hope that the audience can see that through my photos. This has been a big challenge for me at the beginning until i was able to take any kind of photo I want.

Now before pressing the shutter release I take all the photography elements into consideration to succeed a photo. I also edit my photos, something I didn't do before. I am not very keen on post-processing although it's interesting and fun, but by manipulating an image we distort its authenticity. However, my point of view has changed since the beginning that's why I suggest for those who start photography to keep their beginner photos, some of them are masterpieces, we only realize that afterwards.

3. One part of your photography are self portraits, what draws you into this kind of photography?

I use myself as a model to take portraits for several reasons. For instance, when I have an idea for a photo in mind I can't wait to make it happen, as the only model I have on the spot at my disposal is myself, I simply start doing it. In addition I am a very demanding and patient person, to take a single good self-portrait, it sometimes takes me several hours, adjusting the lighting and looking for the right angle, we all know: 'If you want a thing done well, do it yourself'. It's also a real challenge to do more with less, besides I don't think there are many models that would agree to remain exposed to artificial light too long and i don't have to pay myself :) Last but not least self-portraits are not about myself, it just happens to be my face or my body that is quite simply suitable for the concept. Self-portraits are exercises to excel at portraiture, the more I take self-portraits the better.

4. What is the biggest difference in your approach when you're doing portraiture compared to self-portraiture?

There is really no difference because as I mentioned above doing self-portraits is a good practice to do great portraiture. However, when it comes to make a client portraiture, for example, I respect his or her request even if I don't usually take those kinds of photo wanted. Most of people like a properly exposed or bright photo. But when it is a self-portrait, I give free rein to my imagination, as I like the strong contrasts between light and dark, in that case I don't hesitate to take underexposure or dark photos to create the film noir atmosphere.

5. Please describe your process when working with a model.

I usually work with friends, most of them are young artists (singers, actors, fashion models), we cooperate together, they pose for free and they get photographs in compensation. Personally, I have no difficulty in finding a model, we set a date, place and how long the work will take. It's interesting to work with outgoing people to take good and expressive photos. Nowadays you can easily find a free model on the social networks. However, if you have trouble in finding a model, you can ask your relatives or friends to pose for you.

6. Do you have any tips for photographers who never worked with a model before?

I would say: Trust yourself, be confident in what you're doing, express your own ideas, be imaginative and creative, everything can be done, the more photos you take, the better, you can make a selection at the end. Don't copying other photographers'work too much.

Suggest your model to wear her favorite clothes and makeup. Make your model feel comfortable: You can just make a simple conversation, give a compliment, direct them when they don't know what to do, also give your model a sneak peek of the photos that you just took, it helps to loosen up and also to correct her or himself. In case you wanna be on the safe side, have the model sign a little contract, this can avoid some misunderstandings.

7. If you'd have to describe yourself as a photographer in one sentence, what would that sentence be?

I would say I am a passionate photographer. I am very demanding and perfectionist and passion pushes you towards greatness. I've been told that before.

PWS - Stephi

#pws #blog recommendation of the month #photographers on tumblr #original photographers #artists on tumblr #photography #submission

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klaineownsmysoul · 3 years

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I just can't believe that there are people who still believe every single word a public figure/celebrity says, most of the time they LIE. Did C lie about some fans harassing his bf? I have no clue, but if someone was indeed harassing him, that is just not correct. There are crazy fans in every fandom. If people still believe every post or tweet is posted personally by the celebrity, they are just naive and gullible. I don't believe in CC, but that's just my opinion. I do believe D is closeted and just because he posts something or says something nice about someone doesn't mean he actually thinks that, it is most likely PR, just like the unnecessary refurbishment of RR's house. People should wake up and not believe everything they see on the internet. Side note: I couldn't even get mad at yesterday's show because everything is just so ridiculous and bad-acted that it's funny.

At this point, if you aren't side-eyeing basically everything that comes out of Hollywood, you are just willfully ignorant. Its all calculated to a specific end and they don't think twice about contradicting their past selves if it serves a current narrative. Case in point: C saying towards the end of glee that he had no idea who D was when he joined the show when there's a whole interview of him talking about seeing D in AVPM way back when. Like season 2 back when. That's just a blatantly obvious, easily disproved and stupid lie. With regards to this podcast mess - I haven't listened to it and I wasn't on tumblr for most of glee's run so I wasn't really privy to a lot of the goings on that happened bts. Can I believe that there were people who crossed the line of fandom and behaved like assholes? Yes, definitely because it still happens. That kind of behavior is not exclusive to the glee fandom. You will find people like that everywhere. Whether or not they did exactly what he said they did - only he knows that for sure. Its a weird thing to bring up now 6 years after the show has ended as it effectively (and unfairly) paints a bullseye on a specific group. I'm not sure what he was hoping to achieve with this. The CC people that I've interacted with here are lovely and would never in a million years even think of things that horrible. Keep your thoughts and opinions to your own little blog and you don't tag the person in your post - its as simple as that. Who are these nobodies who have that much power that they think they can get a complete stranger fired? If they did indeed behave this way, then that is appalling, completely batshit crazy, and unacceptable - they need professional help. Its not funny, its scary. There's no need for that ever. At the end of the day, its his life and what he does with it and who he spends it with is his business. There's a pretty simple solution if you don't like the person anymore or don't like what they are doing: you can simply stop following them. You don't need to engage in some sort of bizarre smear campaign that has real world implications. Remember all those toxic twitter teens who were ready to draw and quarter D a few months back over that nearly 10 year old pic of him or a comment just as old? The awful things they said about him, the nonstop tagging of him and the flooding of every one of his SM posts with their bullshit? The "you're dead to me if you choose to remain a fan of his" ultimatums? I do! That's the kind of stuff that drives celebs away from SM and ruins it for the rest of us that know how to behave. You're creating an issue where there wasn't one and that's sort of what C did here with his comments.

From my point of view, the issue with C and D's SOs isn't so much that they are with other people, but more to the kind of people they seem to be. I don't know much frankly about W. He's not shoved in my face 24 hours a day and a hovering annoying presence at everything C does. You'll find more pics of C solo or with AF than you will with W. That's why he bothers me less and why D takes more criticism on this. But from what I've heard about him, he's said and posted some pretty awful things in the past and if people choose to not like him because of that, that seems valid to me. As fans, we can only judge celebs by what they say and do and our perception of them - its all we have. My dislike of M is not because she's with D and I'm a super jealous old spinster. And its not because I'm a self hating misogynist. Its because of the way she clings to D and his career while doing nothing on her own, the way she uses him for her own selfish purposes, and the hypocritical way she claimed to not to want to be in the public eye but yet shadows D at every event he goes to because it means cameras and photos and recognition as his wife. That tacky awful commercialized wedding was the last straw for me because I haven't been able to hold my tongue since. And if you follow someone long enough, you can get a pretty good idea of when they're being genuine and when they're bullshitting you or in D's case, when its him posting something and when its a member of his team. For example: where he supposedly proposed. By lying about it - either then or now - you've created a mess that didn't previously exist. Its a fairly simple straightforward statement that most people get right the first time: where they asked their SO to marry them. D says Japan, RR says D called him saying he wanted to do it when he was outside a bathroom in Miami. So the answer is either a) D b) RR c) none of the above. I'm going to go with c, thanks. Unless RR is going to come back and say that D decided to ask her in Miami but then waited until they were physically in Japan to do the asking, I'm going to go with neither of you are right and the reason D blew off the question every time he was asked about it by saying he didn't want to bore us is that you hadn't come up with a good enough and believable story yet. Much like the engagement ring that hadn't been locked down until RR could find a designer willing to make a ring with a diamond big enough to soothe her ego and give off the pretense of being legit. He probably put more effort into that than anything in D's career in the last 5 years. Do I think that RR did help D at one point when he was starting out with gigs, jobs, things like that? Sure. No problem. And maybe they were friends and liked to hang out and jam together. But do I also think that D has outgrown him personally and professionally at this point? Hell fucking yes. He needs a grown up to take his career to the next level and RR is not that person. He completely failed to capitalize on all the awards and well deserved hype D got from ACS and for that alone, he should have been fired. He needs someone who wants to do the work because they understand the rare find they have in D and that their job is to promote him, not themselves. The IOU ep was nothing but a self serving hour of D trying to make RR look and sound like he's not a complete waste of space on top of getting a cut of his fee as his manager. If you look at D's page on the very sad H/yphenate website, you will see the 3 biggest roles D's had are not listed. No Blaine. No Hedwig. No ACS. But oddly enough, a mention of his record deal with Columbia, which I thought went kaput ages ago and his hosting of the Teen Choice Awards in 2013. You know - the big times. Why? I'm going to assume its because he got those roles without RR's help so he doesn't want them there and what does that tell you? It should tell you everything. This is why your manager should be your manager and your friends should be your friends. Its like a parent who wants to be their

child's friend instead of the authority figure they need.

Too much of D's SM has the look and feel of pr and useless ads and just flat out nonsense and that falls squarely under RR's domain. He's a 34 year old man with an established career, not a 21 year old newbie just starting out but his SM doesn't reflect that in any way, shape, or form. The sooner D can cut his losses and break free, the better off his career will be, the more adult he will sound, and the happier I will be.

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kanotototori · 2 years

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Unfortunately I don't have account on any social media, I just kind of float anonymously around tumblr, haha. But if I ever become corporeal on here, you will know! All your thoughts about Kaya/Father + MW/Elktaur are so on point - that's exactly what I've been thinking about! Also when I was watching that one Story of Phantom-MW/Elktaur video for nth time, I started seeing Kaya/Father-Hiyori/Yato parallels, from Because she fell- to -That terrifying mask he wore. (1)

(2) It's a bit silly, to make parallels before we have any grasp on their actual dynamics, but oooh boi, does Kaya brainrot ever stop! Once Kaya will actually appear, it will become even bigger! I mean, can you imagine? She isn't in the manga yet, but I love her so much already. Adachitoka will most likely bring all character arcs to a satisfying end, not before making us all weep, of course. I believe in them! They probably had it all planned out years ago.

Oh no!! How tragic it is that you are a incorporeal Tumblr lurker 😭😭 Talking to a single person through anon feels like sending smoke signals, haha. But either way, I hope your time on my blog has been enjoyable! ;;

That one MW/Elktaur MV w/ “The Story of the Phantom” has seriously been on repeat since yesterday for me, it is so good (and they are so deliciously tragic). Those lines are exactly what made me think of Father/Kaya and Yatori as well!!

Because she fell, and fell hard He was battered and scarred But she could see that inside, there was more

Something alluring, she'd find In the sadness behind That terrifying mask he wore

I’m not much of a Yatori shipper usually (for some odd reason, even though they hit a lot of tropes I go crazy for?) but if you say Father/Kaya + Yatori parallels, I am there in .5 seconds. And if you feel it’s a bit silly to make parallels before we have any grasp on their actual dynamics, then I am the whole damn circus because I’ve been thinking of possible parallels since I laid my eyes on this page when it first came out.

If this doesn’t come up again in context of Father/Kaya, I will eat my own foot. “The despair of knowing they can’t live their lives together”?? Is there something you’d like to share with the class...???

Although I admit there is a certain image of Kaya I have made up in my little rat brain because I wrote a stupid amount of backstory and fic heavily involving her while we anticipate the coming of backstory, there is no possible way for me to not love her when she finally appears in canon... I’ve been faithfully waiting for 6 years (7 if we don’t make any progress by November) for her real appearance, goddammit. Seeing her through Izanami was, of course, nice because we finally got a clear view of her face but!!! Where is THE Kaya??? Let her out of the basement Adachitoka!!

Kaya brainrot never stops, Anon. The bulk of my creative endeavors this year boil down to Father/Kaya brainrot because they have me down that bad (also I’m starved for content, what am I supposed to do???).

Tbh, I admit that I’ve been harboring some anxieties regarding Father’s backstory going forward, but that might just be me psyching myself out. I, too, have believe that Adachitoka-sensei will deliver and make us all weep, as they’ve always done!!

Spoilers for Chapter 100 are just 3 days away so I’m keeping my fingers AND toes crossed for more backstory crumbs...

#asks #noragami #father/kaya #fujisaki kouto #kaya

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i-did · 3 years

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hey! I hope those aftg asks aren’t getting tiring lol but I was wondering if you had any thoughts on the recent fandom treatment of Kevin, which seems to be mainly seeing him as a victim mistreated both in canon by the other foxes & by nora himself? Like I remember in the earlier days of aftg (like maybe around 2016? 2017??) there definitely wasn’t this kind of focus or view of Kevin & I feel like he was treated with somewhat more nuance then? And this could be related to the growing hate for Nora since then but you don’t see people say the same things about the other foxes?? This is a very messy ask lol but I’m genuinely so confused about this trend esp because Kevin seems to be the only fox (as far ive seen anyways) that people are holding up as a victim w/o any nuance

I have a lot of fun answering these, I just sometimes take a minute to get to them lol

Okay so I definitely know what you're talking about with the Kevin thing. The first major factor is that AFTG has finished coming you years ago, and Nora has not actively engaged with the fandom since 2016. I came around into AFTG in 2017 as a reader, and looking at the fanart. Mostly by then you see the race headcanons locked into place and the beginning of the split between fanon and canon. Without more canon, fanon content starts to develop as whoever is more influential the fan creators (fic authors, fan artists) start to do things that trend. As a time passes in a fandom, it tends to split into niches, people who see things a certain way and want to see more of that follow each other and gain followers who agree with them.

There is definitely a Kevin centric niche that thinks those things. I don’t think there was as much focus in general on Kevin back in 2017, but I also was pretty new. But there were no extreme Anti-Andrew fans, back then it was “you are either a fan of Nicky or a fan of Aaron.” People didnt have “dni choking apologists” on their blogs.

I think choking discourse is a good example of the rise of Kevin. Andrew must fall for Kevin to rise. There are kandreil fans that genuinely like all three, and some ace/aro Kevin fans that like him just as he is, but a lot of Kevin centric content I see now on tumblr is about how Andrew is the real villain of AFTG for choking Kevin, despite Kevin violently choking Neil in book 1.

Back in 2018 they weren't pitted against the other and I think the whole “you can only like one character or the other” thing is stupid imo. I like Nicky more than Aaron, but I still think they're both interesting characters. Ive seen a lot of “Kevin was only a victim” takes, and in fact got cyber bullied for a while by some people who thought I was too mean to Kevin in some of my HC by implying he also had some power in the nest and likely hurt others, and that he feels guilt over it. :/ but there is also a similar niche with “you can't blame Aaron for his homophobia, his mom was abusive, and she likely made him that way.”

It's the most similar discourse trend I've seen to the Kevin discourse. It’s a similar lack of nuance, and I think people inflict it their favorite character because they don't want to have a ‘problematic fav.’ Aaron is canonly homophobic, Neil says directly after him and Andrew ‘come out’ to the others, that he was waiting to see the same grief Aaron gave Nicky over his sexuality. It doesn't mean he can't be also a good character or a person someone likes, in fact well written characters have dimensions and flaws.

Which that whole mess is similar to the whole Kevin thing. I think people fall in love with the idea of Nora’s characters, or maybe the fanon characters–but not the real characters. Which is also why they say the author hates them, because they got written to do bad things or not be in the story as much, they defend these characters as if they were real people who need defending, need to be saved from being erased. These characters become “their character.”

I think this also happens because people kin characters and identify with them a lot, so when I said “Kevin was in a position in power in the nest too, even in second place” and then receive threats for how I personally hurt someone who's a CSA survivor because of my Kevin HC I'm like (o – o). I think these people project so hard onto Kevin and design him in their mind, they feel as if character flaw HCs or depictions of Kevin struggling and being mean are personal insults, or at least very personally insulting. And I don't want to sound like an ass, but like my Kevin isn't the same as their Kevin, my Kevin is my Kevin.

I see skinny art of Andrew and art of Neil as white or ginger, these don’t align with my personal HC’s about them, but like that's what I chose to go with. Nora uses language that makes me believe Neil has dark auburn hair, but if people want him to be ginger idc. In canon he was written with the intent to be white, I ignore that because I think him being mixed adds more depth to his character (as well as me being tired of only white mlm, and have updated my reading list). Andrew wasn’t imagined by Nora to be fat either, but I HC him as like a mini muscle bear instead of Toby Hemingway.

I keep the canon intent in mind to remind myself how she actually saw them and how that can color canon and how other people are allowed to see Neil as white and Andrew as skinny. Like I understand why people get annoyed over other peoples hc’s, I feel similarly sometimes. But like at the end of the day, you just gotta move out of that fandom niche and into a new one or just ignore the post.

#ask #aftg #all for the game #tfc #the foxhole court #fandom politics #fandom culture #fandom psychology #mailob

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mrs-nate-humphrey · 3 years

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I'm so sorry, but I just *need* to know your thoughts about Desperate Housewives!

haha, i'm always down to talk about DH! got some disclaimers to slap on first:

a) i watched this show a few years ago. i mean. i was 19 at the time, which isn't THAT long ago, but still: i wonder if i rewatch now, whether i'll have different takes on some of the stuff. there are also probably things i'm misremembering, or have forgotten.

b) i only watched until around the beginning of s3? i temporarily discontinued because of mental health nonsense, and when i was in the right headspace to finish watching the show, it turned out they'd taken it off amazon prime :(

the good news is i know how to continue watching it now (evil giggle) so i will maybe get around to doing that at some point, when uni isn't taking all my brainspace :/

c) you probably know this, pat, but to the casual gg fan on my blog who knows nothing about DH, a lot of my gg-esque complaints/criticism/viewpoints carry forward a bit into DH, too.

it's not a show that'll teach you good morals or good behaviour, essentially - it does look at a certain privileged group of women who do terrible things all the time, and there's a lot of extremely problematic stuff on the show (gabrielle's affair with a high schooler, ew, this one dude tampering with birth control w/o his wife's knowledge, the extremely racist plotline that s2 gave the only Black family in the neighbourhood, that bit where lynette pretends her kids have cancer for the #perks, so many more things i'm likely forgetting... what was that weird baby stealing plot? did not vibe. anywayyy) & i think going into it knowing that it's a garbage fire tv show is VERY important.

i think the same part of my brain that enjoys gg enjoys dh, if that makes sense to say. "i didn't say it was good, i just said that i liked it", and all that.

d) fun fact before i REALLY go into it. i quoted gabrielle solis in a paper for class once.

okay, now, onwards!

hmm, okay, before i begin with DH talk (i know, you're getting SUCH an introduction here, lol) i love the idea of dan & nate watching DH partially because it would make sense for them to do that, like i said earlier - dan being like "milf show, here you go nate" and then both of them getting hooked - but i also love the idea of DN, or any gg characters watching the show, really, because compared to life in wisteria lane, the upper east side actually feels... normal.

alright, pat & whoever else may be reading this. let's go!

i was thinking of going character by character, or housewife by housewife. or whatever. the first thing you realise about this show is that a dead woman is the narrator, which i found very cool. yes, i found it cool. sue me. what the fuck.

anyway! living character time. i'm probably going to start with bree, because well.. *shrugs*. bree is absolutely a problematic fave ......... she is SO problematic in every single way, but the way marcia cross plays her is INCREDIBLY captivating... and to me, there's definitely parallels between leight's blair & marcia's bree. both the characters want things to be perfect sooo badly, to the extent where they're denying things and are very repressed and trying so hard to fit some unattainable standard and - gah.

bree honestly terrifies me more than blair, though - that bit in s2 when she got out her gun and whatnot... i would not want to get on the wrong side of bree van de kamp. & her political views make me want to like, never engage with her ever. i would block her on twitter.

the way she is with her kids also..... in the first two seasons, it sets my teeth on edge, or whatever the saying is. i'm like, perpetually worried about andrew & danielle. and also perpetually like, hey, somebody get those kids some therapy, please.

my cousin, who's watched the whole show, says that bree gets a character arc which is SO good that it's worth watching the whole show just for bree's chara development. she didn't give me any spoilers, because i asked her not to, so the last bree update i have is that she married that serial killer dude. ngl, that cliffhanger itself is worth watching the show for.

so, basically! bree to me feels like a terrible person to meet irl, but a fascinating fictional character. i love her because she's fictional! she makes me very uncomfortable because she reminds me of certain people irl. but ultimately, the way marcia cross played her.......... brb, screaming.

i miss rex. what happened to him [ spoiler! ] should not have happened. i actually really liked rex's energy, and bree & rex reminded me a bit of like... chandler and monica, but SUPER distorted? like, put chandler and monica in a fun house full of mirrors, all the trick mirrors, and maybe, just maybe, you'll get bree and rex. also i think their ship name would be bree-rex, which is so cute?? it's like t-rex. hello.

that speech rex gives bree in the pilot about "where's the woman i fell in love with who drinks milk from the carton?" always makes my heart hurt. (also i was considering giffing an incorrect blate to that. something about breerex when they don't fit together hits all my blair & nate feels. *shrugs*)

moving on... lynette. (i just googled her to check if i spelt her name right, and YEAH, i did! but apparently her middle name is lindquist. interesting). i don't really know what to say about lynette - her backstory, re: being good at her career, really thriving, and then having kids, and tom being all like "you should take care of them" and her having to leave work, which she loved, to take care of her kids, which she.... did not love, let's put it like that... it makes me sad, because it's a reality for so many women. tom should've been a househusband, etc etc.

lynette terrifies me too, mostly because of how it feels like there is nothing she wouldn't do. in some of my gg meta, i've mentioned that dan is an "ends justifies the means" kind of person.... oh, he is nothing compared to lynette. i feel like lynette would kill a man if she had to. she is just always stressed and always working high stakes and harbouring so much (justified!) resentment and - idk. it's complicated. maybe in a different environment, she'd be different.

things with lynette and tom are also extremely ??? to me. the whole thing of how tom cheated on someone w/ lynette, and then tom & lynette got married, and the fact that it's something both of them seem to view as romantic?? what disaster spouses, good lord.

anyway. i'm just gonna drop this here, because i'm me. bree & lynette had a vibe. they REALLY did. they should've wived each other, i would have loved to watch that show. (i think there might even be fic out there, but i didn't look too hard. i would've ended up spoiling the show for myself, since most of it seemed to contain spoilers.)

susan. ngl, susan is my favourite. idk why people hate her so much... i went on the DH tags on tumblr a while ago and people are writing such verbose, eloquent anti-susan-meyer rants. i guess she did something truly awful after the second season which made people hate her?? (don't tell me, lol.)

susan just radiates disaster bi energy. like. i don't think i've EVER headcannoned a character as bisexual as quickly as i did with susan. there is just NO way that is a heterosexual woman. absolutely no way in hell.

i found susan really relatable when i was 19 & watching this!!! she is just so bad at so many things she should not be so bad at. the fact that she BURNS A HOUSE DOWN in the pilot.... BY ACCIDENT... because she crept in there to SPY on her RIVAL whom she thought had scored a date with a man she was too nervous to ask out... susan, what are you doing. you are so bad at being an adult. i love you.

julie has so much emotional intelligence. and, i glimpsed a spoiler which i'm only vaguely aware of but like... it seems like her arc overall, thru the show, wasn't as cool as she deserved. sometimes it seems like julie is parenting susan instead of vice versa. despite that, i felt like the susan & julie mother/daughter dynamic was pretty good... especially compared to how some of the other mothers (*cough* bree i'm lookin' at you *cough*) were with their kids. sure, it wasn't the healthiest dynamic in a lot of ways, you shouldn't treat your child as your peer, which susan often did. anyway.

(i just get a big kick out of dan's favourite being susan, too. and i love the image of dan & nate watching DH together, and nate being like "she reminds me of you" and dan getting all "nate how dare you" about it lkggkh but also is nate even wrong? dan's always been awkward, he knows he's always been awkward, and here is a character who is visibly a disaster. why can't susan just be allowed to be bad at things? he gets protective of her so damn quick. no i am not projecting haha why would you say that?)

edie my most beloved. edie is the best part of this show, hands down. i don't know what more to say. i mean, all the characters are problematic in some way or the other, but nobody does it quite as stunningly or fabulously as edie does. if you've read the asoue series, i just gotta say... edie has esme energy, sort of?? i mean, she's not evil in the same way, just in terms of the vibe. like the, i'm gonna be a stylish nuisance kind of vibe.

(i think edie would be nate's favourite. i WANT edie to be nate's favourite. i want nate to look at edie and her confidence and how fucking unapologetic she is about literally everything, and go, "hey, i'm gonna channel that vibe." i want nate to learn to put himself first, because of edie britt.)

and the susan/mike/edie love triangle......well. i gotta admit that i was 100% a susan/mike shipper (i found spoilers for what happens on tumblr and i am so devastated. i can't believe they [redacted ] like WHY would they - ) but. you know what i've always, always thought was better than susan & mike?

susan and edie. those few episodes (how many episodes? 1? 2? 3? definitely not more than that) where they were best friends and doing things together was SUCH a good vibe. susan and edie had such a great dynamic and i just loved it.... there's something so homoerotic about having a rival, and love triangles ALWAYS get so much better when you get a gay outcome. susan and edie are like, my otp from this garbage show, i think.

(& yes, i think DN would ship them too. because this is my evil headcanon land and i can make one of my otps ship another of my otps. this really IS how i live, thanks for asking.)

i think i've covered everyone except gaby! i have such mixed feelings re: gaby. by virtue of being the only housewife of colour, i'm already naturally protective of her, but i just wish SO badly that they hadn't had her have an affair with a high schooler. couldn't she have had an affair with someone older? if they wanted to do the "woman in her 30s has sex with a younger man oh lord the scandal" couldn't they have chosen like. a twenty year old. or something. and the show was SO aware of this, so many people talk about how this is wrong and gross and if i remember right, the boy's mother even calls gaby a p*dophile or whatever, which was... really weird and jarring? in the sense of like - the show didn't think that it was "nbd", they thought it was a big deal, but they wanted us to accept it because it was gaby.

and honestly, keeping that aside, if that had never happened, i would've probably adored gaby? (is this what being a chucky fan feels like. i mean, it's not the same thing. but also, it's kind of the same thing.) gaby had such good lines, eva longoria played her so well, and there was a lot that really intrigued me about like... her character motivations, the fact that she wanted a rich husband and not a good one, and the way the narrative (if i remember right) never judged her for that... gaby's backstory was also tragic, and carlos was such a dick to her for so much of what i watched, i didn't like that :/ i think he gradually becomes better, if meta i've read is to be believed, but... idk. he did some truly unforgivable things. and it pisses me off, that the ONE non-white main couple they had were dysfunctional in this way. but then again, everyone on the show is dysfunctional, so... idk.

i do remember seeing some chair on here who'd made a moodboard of all their ships from various fandoms, and they'd put their chuck/blair edit RIGHT NEXT to their gabrielle/carlos one. it made me kind of go :0 because i definitely see the parallels. not to stereotype or anything, but i think there are definitely common elements to both ships, so if you like one, you might like the other, and ditto with disliking them.

reiterating, now, at the very end, that i've only watched s1 & s2, and that was a WHILE ago. if anything here doesn't make sense, or if i've missed anything, that's probably why :) i hope this was somewhat satisfying to read! <3 and if you disagree or think any of these are totally off, that's totally fine too, naturally. for me a big part of being proship is just understanding that different people interpret characters in different ways, so like....... of course you don't have to agree with all of this, haha.

#meta #desperate housewives #scullysimp #wondering if i should put this in #crossover #or in #personal #putting it in both because why tf not #i put this in MS word to see how long it was #it's a wholeass 2.4k. WOW

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kingkatsuki · 2 years

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Oh.. I'm.. So emotional right now. Jo. I found your blog two years ago in April, when it was pandemic and it was a depressing time for everyone. And i was reading a lot of fics. And maybe you remember me saying it but I'll say it again, you were the first ever person who opened up my eyes and i was REALLY able to imagine MYSELF with 2d person. Because usually I was just reading it as "some girl" but with your fics I finally was able to imagine myself w Katsuki. And LIVE SHOW changed it the most bc it feels more real and closer to the real world. And now, after (well, idk how many years it was for you but it was-) two years or maybe two and a half, here comes the continuation...

I grew up. I see myself as a better person worthy of love, it's easier to imagine myself now. but you. You still was someone who introduced me to it. To this kind of love. Who opened my eyes. And I would never stop repeating it. When i found out your blog, you had it on hiatus and i was killed by it. Because it never was enough, you know. Of your fics where i was able to feel loved first time in my life. By 2d person i mean. But now. You just released the new part. And.. I don't know Jo, i am crying right now bc I started this journey of love and joy with your story. And this is just my own view of things but it feels like with this new part I should look behind and look at all the way I walked.

I know you're down sometimes. And you don't feel sure in writing. Screw that, Jo, screw that. You helped me feel love and when i say that you mean a lot to me, i mean it. Your writing did it, your feelings did it and you, yourself did it. Thank you for everything ❤️❤️❤️

Yulia!! Omg I still vividly remember the message you sent me all those months ago about Live Show, it was honestly one of the most incredible, heartfelt messages I’d ever received on my fics and it made me so frigging emotional that I could have such a positive impact on someone just by writing fanfic?

I know exactly what you mean about reading fics and thinking of yourself when you’re reading, thinking of that “perfect person”, but that moment where you start to be able to actually imagine yourself in fics with your faves is life changing!

You’re one of the kindest, loveliest people I’ve had the pleasure to meet and I don’t want you to ever think or believe that you’re not worthy of love, because you are.

Thank you for reading and for sticking by me all these years🥺

And Bakugou would be so completely obsessed with you it’s not even funny.💕

#jo talks #sobbing crying throwing up

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merlinfic · 3 years

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group ask for lost fics #31

Hi y’all! Below are a few lost fics that us mods just can’t seem to find. That being said, we’re hoping that you lovely followers are able to help! If anyone knows any of the fics below please reply below or send in an ask with which anon/user and group ask that the fic corresponds when the ask is back open!

Note: previous group asks and all lost fics!

Anon 1 asked:

Hello! I’m looking for a fic i read a long time ago but the details are a bit fuzzy. It was a reincarnation fic where Gwen was Arthur’s PA and she was trying to keep Arthur and Merlin apart because she remembered their past and she wanted him to choose her. I remember her yelling that Arthur always chose Merlin in the end and it wasn’t fair or something along those lines?

Anon 2 asked:

hi guys! thank you for all your help and support to this community :) anyhooo could you find me a fic?

i remember it was 14 chapters long, ao3, and an arthur returns fic. the twist was that albion’s greatest need was merlin turning dark after being alone and tainted for so long (without an anchor). gwen’s reincarnation brought back arthur from the lake and freya put a barrier on him so merlin couldn’t see him. arthur stayed with gwen (who used to be merlin’s student and is again later). arthur moves in with merlin and so does gwen later on. merlin’s getting corrupted by his ‘darkness’ that is obsessed with serving arthur and only listens to him. i know the magical council tried to execute merlin but he transported them to australia or something. they find leon later on in the fic and morgana bonds with him as well. merlin blows arthur in the kitchen in one scene i think?? and they become guardians of earth at the end or something with this tattoo bonding ritual. thank you!!

Anon 3 asked:

Hi i was looking for this merlin fanfic based on the wild hunt i remember that merlin got possessed after touching something meant from arthur left by morgana after she was defeated. i also remember the arthur hot possessed by a goddess to “defeat” merlin.

Anon 4 asked:

Hi! I was hoping you guys could help me find a fic. I don't remember much of the setup, but Merlin ends up being kidnapped by an assassin/serial killer? Merlin couldn't defend himself because he kept seeing the future instead of the present? The killers son ends up helping the knights find Merlin. There was also a tree that he'd hang people from. Canon era, very dark. I'm almost certain I found it from this blog, but I haven't seen it in the tags and stuff I've looked through. Thank you so much

Thanks to @vaksurik-ozhika for suggesting Overheard by hujwernoo!

Anon 5 asked:

Hey guys, hope you're all okay, I wonder if you guys could help me find a fic that I've lost?

I don't remember much, but here we go:

Merthur and the knights were traveling to another kingdom or in a quest of some sorts, Merlin and Arthur were bickering like the old married couple that they've always been and the knights point out to them that they behave like that, they just dismiss it. They stop by a village and are welcomed by an actual old married couple, seeing how their behavior was similar to his and Arthur's merlin freaks out, try to call Arthur out for it, but Arthur simply kisses him. One of the knights, probably Gwaine, finds them and says something around the lines "it's about time", hope you can help me, kisses <3

Thank you @annielisiel-w-l for sending in Like an Old Married Couple by PJOfanatix!

@the-tortoise-lady asked:

Hi :) I hope you're all well!

I love your blog, it has guided me to most of my favourite fics ever!! And for that I will be forever grateful!

I remember reading a fic (a year ago?) Which was in a modern setting where Merlin and Arthur worked together and merlin still kind of had magic (which Arthur doesn't know) and tried to protect arthur by giving him lots of little charms like enchanted stones or sth, I think it was a magic reveal in the end

It was really cute, but I don't remember the name of the author sadly, maybe you can help?

Thanks to @kardolsher for suggesting Get Sick Soon by Polomonkey!

Anon 6 asked:

Hi! There was this one fic I read that I can’t find, it had merlin sitting on arthur’s lap and they were fucking a leon walked in and they didn’t stop. Do you guys know what it is? Thank you so much!

Thanks to @thelady-mary for suggesting A partner for life by ohmerthurcharm!

Anon 7 asked:

heeey you! I am searching for a fic and who else could I ask for help? It was something along the lines of Arthur being in a relationship but growing to slowly realize he was in love with Merlin. Arthur had this dream of eloping with Merlin so the knights along with Gwen (I believe Morgana also) made a plan so they would go on a quest and Arthur would “die” there, leaving Gwen to rule alone. Also, Morgana and Gwen were secretly together.

Anon 8 asked:

I’m looking for this story where it’s a modern au and Arthur thinks Merlin and Gwaine are dating but Gwaine is just a really bad boyfriend, but it turns out they were never dating. Does that sound familiar? I think it was on Ao3. Thanks in advance.

Thanks to @take-me-to-a-time-of-magic for sending in Getting It Right by SPowell!

Anon 9 asked:

Hello darlings! I wanted to know if any of you could help me find this fanfic. It was set on Canon Era and Arthur was split into three versions of himself, I remember one Merlin called Prat, and another he called Hero but Arthur called that one Coward. I don't remember much, but could you please help me?

Thanks to @dracopottermalfoy for suggesting Split by TheAsexualofSpades!

@alsomabs asked:

Hi there! I remember a fic — but only by this one segment of a battle, and have been desperately searching for it.

In this battle, Mordred is on Camelot’s side. An angry Wyvern is involved, who if I’m not wrong! Was spelled by Morgana? Merlin then falls off a turret because of the wyvern, but is protected by both his and mordred’s magic. Leon or someone afterwards is secretly feeding the wyvern I think. I’ve been going through so many tags but I can’t find it 😭

Part 2 of my ask is — how in the world do you remember fics (that you recommend!)? Do you catalogue them when you come across them, and store that to recc/help other’s find?

Thank you for the work you do!

To answer the second part of your question: personally, I don’t catalogue anything other than what gets posted here lmao. Finding fics, for me, just comes down to knowing how to search for things if I’m honest (I say as I’m making a massive post about fics we can’t find lmaooo). ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Glad you found it! For those interested it’s so close and I'm halfway to it by ariadne_odair, which you need an ao3 account to view!

@graceworm asked:

Hi! I'm looking for a fic I read a while ago. It's a modern au in which Arthur + knights are frat boys, and Arthur has to have sex with Merlin in front of everyone (maybe as hazing? not sure), and in the end we learn that they're together and I think Merlin planned it. I looked through AO3 and the tags but I couldn't find it. Thank you!!

Glad you found it! For those interested it’s the lure would prove too much by minor_hue!

Anon 10 asked:

Hi! I was wondering if you could find a very specific fic for me. So Arthur Merlin and the knights get kidnapped by like 6 mages and they force Merlin and Arthur to have sex to get Merlin pregnant (there's a ritual involving potions and runes) and then after they are free to go with one mage (who they don't know is a mage) and they live in the castle until Merlin is going to give birth then the mage that come with them tries to kill Merlin and the baby cause she doesn't want to die, because the mages linked their life to the ritual to ensure that Merlin could get pregnant as one can't create a life without sacrificing another. I can't remember much else but I really hope you can find it for me! as I've been looking for years.

And as always this post will be updated if any fics are found!

#other: group asks for lost fics #other: lost fics #other: fic find #mod danielle

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