#why would anyone want this for Gwyn’s book?

[acourtofthought]

@starsreminisce posted these comments on their blog:

And the last paragraph really stood out to me.

Something I've seen said by a certain side of the fandom is that a bonus chapter should not change the trajectory of what is in the actual book. I disagree with that because I look at the bonus chapters as a sneak peek of what's to come in future books (with this particular bonus following the pattern talked about in a post yesterday, with the resolution to the small story pointing us in the direction of Gwynriel), things that Sarah will at a later point expound on within the actual series even if they weren't initially clear to us without having read the bonus.

But say that's the truth, say the bonus chapters are only in line with that which we already know (which still works for Gwynriel because though the bonus hinted at Gwyn having a curiosity towards Az and him possibly having a bond with her, we do see bits of that in the actual book as well, there are scenes with her staring in his direction and scenes where he's staring in hers, where he shows admiration for her, where she's teasing him, where Nesta calls Az her new ribbon).

One of the big arguments is that it's extremely clear that Elain has no interest in Lucien, that it's been the case for multiple books. It's said Elain does not owe Lucien an explanation, that she does not owe him her time or attention.

So why not write an Elain bonus chapter in SF where she and Lucien have a conversation discussing how they don't want to explore their bond? According to E/riels there's no need for it in the first place since she's made herself clear but they have also claimed that she won't break the bond until we have her POV. Then wouldn't a bonus in Elain's POV before her book be the perfect place for something that's so obvious so that when she starts her own book "with Az", there's nothing standing in their way and the focus can be on their romance and the plot and not the emotional toll that her severing her bond with Lucien would take? If the Elucien bond is as much of a non issue as some claim it be be, then why not deal with it in an Elain Bonus Chapter? When her book starts, Sarah could even recap the events of the bonus for those who had missed it.

Elain thought back to that conversation she and Lucien shared shortly after Solstice. Where after Azriel's rejection, which had cut her deeply, she realized there was no place in her heart for anyone but Az even if she wasn't sure he still wanted her.

That would have actually be a perfect way for SJM to move us past the Elucien bond with very little in the way of feeling devastated on Lucien's behalf, where his heart is not being broken in real time within her romantic arc.

But the author didn't do that. She gave Az and FEYRE a POV. Feyre who already had 3 books and a novella and Elain with a total of 0.

We know Az doesn't think Lucien is good enough for Elain but we don't know if Elain agrees with that.

We know Az questioned the Cauldron because of his brothers and her sisters, that he hadn't thought of being with Elain beyond his sexual fantasies but we don't know where Elain stands on the whole "just wants one taste / why wasn't Az made my mate" debate.

We know Az thought of Elain as too trusting and hopeful but we've no clue whether Elain was really thinking anything of the sort.

We've got Feyre thinking back on how she made sure to keep her mouth shut on Elain not wearing Lucien's gloves, how had she put them on she would have never been pierced in the first place but we still don't know whether Elain's actions with the gloves actually line up with her thoughts.

If Sarah wanted to continue on with what is apparently so evident in the four books of buildup for E/riel there was nothing preventing her from finally giving us Elain's POV in SF and having her tell Lucien that there's no reason for him to hold out hope any longer.

The more likely explanation for why Elain wasn't given a bonus is because everything that E/riels and Az claim that is so very obvious regarding Elain's character might actually not be as obvious as they think.

If she's so happy in the NC, then why hide her thoughts?

If she's so in love with Az, that it's clear as day, then why hide her thoughts?

If she's so disinterested in Lucien, then why hide her thoughts?

If we're supposed to believe that Elain's choice is Az, that there is no competition and that it should not be a mystery to anyone at this point, then why has she been so reticent to put us into Elain's head?

#elain archeron #pro elucien #elucien #lucien vanserra #pro lucien vanserra

[loveyazy]

Hi! So I haven't read acotar (well a little bit but it didn't hook me) but I've been reading your posts about the upcoming book and I'm so curious, I don't know these characters but the second hand gossip is fun and I'm rooting for them lol when does the book come out? when will it be announced who the protagonists are?

JSHDKAKJSD I had written so much on my phone but then I closed all the apps and I lost it so hopefully I can remember most of it still.

The thing is it's OBVIOUS it's going to be Elain. She has even said in this interview x at 25:00. I don't know why people genuinely think GWYN is going to be the next book 🫠. Her purpose was to help Nesta. Outside of that, there is not much left to tell of her story. It's done. TBH, I completely forgot she even existed after I finished reading ACOSF. Like I kept seeing posts about her on my insta discover, and I was like who tf is Gwyn? 💀

Also just... ELAIN IS THE THIRD ARCHERON SISTER. How can it NOT be about her when Feyre had the first three and then Nesta had the fourth? Like it's so painfully obvious. Anyone who thinks otherwise is just delusional.

Even if it's not Elain and it happens to be Mor, it's NOT going to be Gwyn before Elain LMFAO.

But this is why I think it's going to be Elriel and not Elucien.

Firstly, Koschei the Deathless. The story follows Ivan marries his THREE SISTERS to THREE WIZARDS.

Ivan saw his three sisters wed to the first suitors who came across them—wizards in the form of birds.

Hmmm THREE SISTERS. BIRDS >>>> BATS. 👀

Eventually Ivan goes on to defeat Koschei with the help of his sisters and their husbands.

And then we have another Koschei retelling. The FOX and the FIREBIRD. Listen Sarah was not subtle with the names. Vasalisa >> Vassa. Lucien had a fox mask in ACOTAR, making him the obvious fox. You can read more on it here but I'm going to do a quick summary.

A king has a garden that produces one gold apple a day, but it was stolen every night. He promised half his kingdom to whichever son could catch the thief. He has three sons, and they all tried to catch it. The third son saw the firebird and shot at it, and hit the bird in the wing, but it escaped and left behind a golden feather. The king wants the fire bird and promises whoever brings the fire bird alive would get half the kingdom and be the heir. So they all go out to find the Fire Bird, and they all encounter a Red Fox.

The fox approaches each prince, and asks for something to eat, but the first two shoot at it. The third prince shares his food. So the Red Fox takes him to the palace where the fire bird is and tells him how to grab the fire bird by putting it in the wooden cage, not the golden. Well, the prince says how can a lovely bird be in a wooden cage and proceeds to put it back in the golden, but then basically sounds an alarm and he gets arrested. The King tells him to bring him back a golden man.

The fox says he'll help the prince, but of course the prince is a dumbass and goes I'm gonna choose the pretty one instead of the one the fox told me to choose and he gets arrested and this king says bring back Princess Goldilocks from the Golden Palace in the Black Sea.

Anyways it goes on and the third brother is betrayed by his other two, and the fox brings him back to life. In the end he gets the kingdom, the firebird, Goldilocks, etc. The fox is very instrumental in this story.

SPOILERS AHEAD IF YOU HAVEN'T READ ALL OF ACOTAR

We have hints that Lucien and Vassa are very close. They talk to each other. Plus they live together along with Jurian.

Plus if it was going to be Elucien there would be hints that Elain even had romantic feelings for him. Even a little attraction. She doesn't. She literally stares at a boiling tea kettle until he leaves because she doesn't want to spend any time with him.

She wants nothing to do with him. And yes sure she says she doesn't want a male, but remember that she is still dealing with the traumatic events of being forced into the cauldron and being changed.

This though, happens a year later with Azriel...

Imagine seeing this in the most recent book, and thinking they're like siblings. Sounds like the antis have some sort of incesty weird freaky ass sibling relationships. 😬

This also happens in the book, which I believe is during the same time? But Az's was a bonus chapter and this was available to everyone.

Elain is not herself around Lucien. I don't understand how anyone can see their relationship and think that's going to be endgame. This was the most recent book.

Even before ACOSF, Nesta and Cassian had this in the previous book that alluded to their romance.

But there is absolutely nothing to allude to any sort of Elucien romance. Elain wants NOTHING to do with Lucien. And honestly, I don't blame her. Who would? He was a part of the most traumatic thing that ever happened to her.

I'll never understand Elucien shippers. If you like Lucien, why would you ship him with someone who wants nothing to do with him? If you like Elain why would you ship her with someone she wants nothing to do with?

I'm 10000000% convinced the Elucien shippers are just Gwynriels who ship them so they can have their ship justified, but most of their evidence is just their headcanons, and them not being able to read between the lines and interpreting things very wrong.

#pro elriel #anti gwynriel #anti elucien #elriel #pro elain archeron #pro azriel #i tagged these as antis so if you come for me I'm going to ask why the fuck you're here?

[silverlinedeyes]

A Court of Dancing Shadows

As Recorded by Gwyneth Berdara

A potential summary and description of the Azriel Gwyn Nesta book idea* that is floating around, the plot of which I can’t stop thinking about and trying to imagine:

Follow Az and Gwyn in dual POV as Az and Nesta go on a journey to revive dusk and establish Valkyrie HQ with Gwyn as their sidekick.

Gwyn is there as an official scribe, making sure this gets recorded for Prythian history (I mean what else is her role?), but also I guess as Az’s girlfriend? (I am refraining from continuing down this path of thought before I say something bad.)

Gwyn’s POVs focus on Nesta, what she does, how she uses the Starborn power or whatever to revive dusk (I know I know Nesta’s power is death, how are she and Az, whose power is shadows, going to bring the land back to life? It’s not my job to answer these questions. This is their story. But I digress.), and also how obsessed Gwyn is with Az and his shadows.

Gwyn almost gets eaten by a Wyrm. Nesta saves her with a Trove weapon Gwyn can’t wield.

And while they travel the land, at night, Gwyn sings around the campfire and Az’s shadows dance. Az sometimes joins in the singing. Nesta watches. And then Gwyn and Az sneak away from Nesta once she’s asleep to f*ck. Hopefully she doesn’t hear.

One brother, one sister, and a bestie (and the shadows who love her).

Cassian is…nowhere to be found on this journey lol. Nesta could leave him behind (and he let her apparently).

And we get more Valkyrie training scenes and get to see them ride the Pegasi after they free Dusk and establish Valkyrie HQ.

Oh, and Gwyn somehow heals Az (even though I thought Az needed therapy first?) and makes him love Illyrians again.

The end!

I can’t 🤣🤣🤣

*this is a shitpost and a joke but also…..someone please help me understand what the actual plot and romance and storyline of this book would be because I’m at a loss.

#shitpost #acotar shitpost #anti gw*nriel #anti gwynr*el #the cracks are showing #but really what the fuck would this book look like? #I want to see a proposed plot and outline from them #Az Nesta and sidekick gwyn? #why would anyone want this for Gwyn’s book? #make it make sense

[fieldofdaisiies]

Whisper of the Forgotten | pt. 5

pairing: azriel x reader | type: angst | words: 2,2k words | warnings: mentions of trauma and violence | masterlist

Your head whips into his direction, eyes wide open, heart racing. His shoulders are squared, shadows slowly dancing around him, his face unreadable, emotionless as he looks at you. 

"I wouldn’t know what there is to talk about." You focus your gaze back on the book, trying to ignore him. But he is like a nasty fly, he lingers and then draws closer.

"About us."

"There is no us!" You spit and whirl towards him, getting up quickly. "You destroyed us five centuries ago!"

"Y/N." Azriel reaches for you but you rip your arm away. "Please, let me explain."

"You betrayed me. You left me to die, Azriel." You channel all the energy you have left, straightening your posture, squaring your shoulders. "I don’t want to talk to you, Azriel, ever again. I told you I loved you and a day after you betrayed me. I don’t think there is anything to explain."

You are seething with anger, fire blazing through your veins, your heart aching so fiercely.

"I loved you too.” His voice is hoarse, his chest heaving with a deep inhale.

"You wouldn’t have betrayed me if you really did,” you snap.

Azriel lifts his scarred hands, then drops them and looks desperate. Gone is the strong and powerful warrior, his shoulders droop, his lips quaver. "There was no other choice.” He swallows and a shudder courses through his body. “Please, listen to me. Please, let me explain."

"I don’t want to hear your explanation! I don’t want to hear it!" You are screaming at this point. "I can barely breathe when I am in the same room as you. You make me feel like I am getting suffocated." 

Your shouts have been so loud, they alert Gwyn and Nesta who come rushing into the room.

The door swings open and Azriel whips around.

In an instant, Gwyn is at your side, your body vibrating so fiercely with anger and betrayal, she can feel it.

“What is going on?” Nesta asks, her voice kept level, but you can hear the anger and worry within her tone.

You feel how panic starts to rise within you and know that you have to get out. You are so close to breaking. You need to get out. 

“I can’t do this,” you breathe and before anyone can stop you you run. Past Gwyn, past Azriel, past Nesta, your heart racing like a horse in the wild.

You rush outside the living room, down to the Library. You need to get away. Away from Azriel. You can’t be near him, the pain over his betrayal breaks once again. 

───── ⋆⋅ ☽☾ ⋅⋆ ─────

“What did you do?” Nesta questions Azriel. Her brows are furrowed, her finger poking into his pectoral.

“I tried to talk to her.” Azriel lowers his gaze.

Nesta bristles and so does Gwyn next to her.

“I don’t know what exactly happened between the two of you, but what I know is that she is deadly scared of you and doesn’t want to be near you,” Gwyn says, frowning at Azriel. 

Azriel shakes his head, the void within his heart only growing.

But what she doesn’t know — what no one knows— is that he loved you. And maybe, finally it is time to reveal everything. To Gwyn and Nesta, and later to everyone else.

“We used to be lovers,” Azriel admits in a low voice. And then he opens up, tells the whole story about how you met in Illyria —not in the war camps, but in the Steppes. Your relationship was new and secret, not even Rhys and Cass knew, but somehow Rhysand’s father found out about you and saw you as a threat. And then it happened; he wanted you dead, worrying you could defeat him, overpower him, or get in his way. 

Azriel only had two options: your death or the Prison. Obviously he chose the latter. He would have done everything to save your life — even accept his own death.

“Do you understand why I need to talk to her now?” He is impatient, wants to follow after you, but the two Valkyries don’t let him.

Nesta inhales deeply, arms crossed over her chest. She turns to look at Gwyn and then says, “I don’t like the idea of you following her when she is so scared of being alone with you, but I think she needs to know the truth as well.”

It is all Azriel needs to hear. He brushes past Nesta and heads for the door. And then hurries to the Library until he stops at your door (he knows it is your door because he has been here before, followed you the other day but didn’t knock then).

His scarred knuckles rasp against the door, he inhales a deep breath and waits. Then he knocks.

“We need to talk, Y/N.”

He stands in the doorframe, not allowing you to close the door and it angers you. You want him to leave. He broke you. And now he stands here, thinking he can fix all the shattered pieces with a few words of apology.

“What I did was the worst I could do to you, but now that we got another chance I want to use it.”

Azriel is faster than you can react, sliding into the room, now standing right in front of you, so close you‘re breathing the same air.

“We didn’t get another chance, Azriel.” You move closer to him, despite what this does to your body. Despite the anger simmering within your veins, despite the wounds being ripped open once again. One by one, the pain is so strong it nearly makes you whimper. 

“Because there is no we.” You spit the last part, jaw clenched, forehead lying in furrows. 

It hurts so much, seeing him standing there, acting like what he has done is not the worst that someone could do to a person they allegedly love. He did not only break your heart back then, he broke your soul. And he broke the connection between the two of you.

You had felt it the first time you had laid eyes on him. You had felt it right in this moment – the bond. The mating bond, the probably most powerful connection between two people. 

But he had given you no chance to reveal it. You had wanted to wait for the right moment, then you had told him you loved him and the next thing you can remember is getting caught, people – males– hurting you and him hauling you away to the prison. 

You hated him in this moment. You have loathed him for that since then. But when you really think about it, you have to admit that hatred has never been the feeling in the foreground. It has always been pain. Hurt. Anger. Betrayal. 

You loved him, more than anything in the world, more than your own life and he did something like that to you. Hurt you like that. You could have never been prepared for a feeling like this. 

“I did it to protect you,” he whispers. His chin drops to his chest. “I never meant for it to happen that way, but I had to do what I did in order to protect you.”

You ignore him — not able to listen or wanting to listen to him. Your eyes are burning, the back of your mouth aching. You want to hit him, scream at him, but you are left without words. Your body feels exhausted, tired, empty. You want to sleep, and feel nothing. 

“Do you have any idea what was done to me in the Prison? What I went through. What I had to go through. What I suffered.” You finally speak up after a long moment of silence. Slowly you lift your gaze to him, wanting to see the look in his eyes. 

The former cold is now replaced by regret, remorse, his shoulders are slightly slouched and the corner of his mouth twitches. 

Slowly, Azriel shakes his head. “I don’t know, but I can imagine. And I can’t tell you how sorry I am.” His throat works on a swallow. “I wish I could have protected you from all the pain.”

“You are the one who caused me the pain!” you scream at him, each syllable dripping with betrayal and anger. “You broke me Azriel.”

“I did it to protect you,” he once again says and you want to tear his tongue out for saying this all the time. It is bullshit. He did it to impress the High Lord. He did it to create a good image of himself. 

The same thing you try now in order to regain your powers. You have to act good around the High Lord of the Night Court and his IC and once they trust you enough to give you back your powers, leave. 

“Y/N–” he starts but you cut him off. 

“Do you know what they did when they caught me? When your men caught me and brought me to you?”

You step away from him.

“I didn’t send them.” They weren’t Azriel’s men. They were Rhysand’s father’s men, but you don’t know that, Azriel realises in this moment. The High Lord had sent them back and he tried to be there before them, to save you from them, but he was too late and the damage had already been done. 

“I tried to be there before them.” He folds his hands behind his back, his chin lowering the slightest bit. 

You hold his gaze, tears burning in your eyes. Your hands move to your neck. 

“Don‘t lie to me.” You grind your teeth so hard, your jaw starts to ache. But you hold his gaze, withstand the urge to look away. You won’t give him that. You won’t be weak in front of him. 

Azriel swallows again and parts his lips, probably wanting to say another silly lie or apology, or probably trying to convince you he didn’t send them. But you don’t want to hear it. You lift your hand to stop him.

“Don’t lie to me, Azriel,” you say again. “Not after everything you have done to me.”

Your hands drop to the dress you are wearing and slowly you start to unbutton it. 

Azriel’s breath catches because he has no idea what is happening. HIs eyes are trained on you, he can’t look away. 

You peel away every layer of clothing until you stand bare in front of him. But this is not a sexual act and in his eyes there is no desire, no lust. There is only shock. Horror. Pain.

He is mortified by the look of your body. Your skin is marred, scars adorning every inch of it. The chilly air brushes your skin but you withstand it, having grown so used to it. The cold has slowly become you, you have become cold. Your heart has become cold, empty, dead. 

“That’s what they did, Azriel,” you tell him. “That’s how they treated me when they found me.” You let the dress fall to the ground, shivering the slightest bit, you still hold his gaze. 

You know what your skin looks like, having brushed your fingers over the marred skin many days, thinking about if you would ever be able to love yourself again.

But you have managed to do so. This is your body, your home, you temple, you would never hate it and the scars are only a testament of how strong you are, what you have survived. 

Azriel says nothing for a long moment. He only stares, stomach coiling, chest squeezing.

“That’s what the High Lord’s men did when they caught me. All these scars,” —you brush your sharp nails down your cleavage— “is what the caused me when they tried to catch me, using their knives and swords.”

Your throat works on a swallow.

“And then you arrived.” You move towards him, stepping over your clothes. “And I thought you came to save me, that the nightmare finally has an end, but you hauled me away and put me into the Prison.”

You move closer to him.

“Do you want to see what they did to me?”

He wants to say no, but he can’t. He has to see it. You had to go through it and live with it. The least he can do is see it, knowing it will break him apart, but it is what he deserves. 

“Show me.”

You slide your hand around his throat and slowly each sharpened, pointed fingernail digs into the flesh on the back of his neck, until you are inside – inside his mind.

tag list wotf: @goldenmagnolias @chessebookgirl @blackgirlmagicforever @mollygetssherlockcoffee @honeysuckle-daydreams13 @janebirkln @cleverzonkwombatsludge @namelesssav @sidthedollface2 @brujitafantomatico @ruler-of-hades @favsrachz @katherinejess @jesus-is-me @ashbatz @onyx-obsession @mischiefmanagers @thesnugglingduck @wandas-dream @emryb @esposadomd @marvelouslovely-barnes @landofpetrichor @sheblogs @zoe2 @leeknows-wife @secretlyhers @itsswritten @lupinswolfsbanes @auggiesolovey @going-through-shit @esposadomd @ithan-holstroms-girl @v3lv3tf0x @hibye02 @karinalight @darling006 @just-a-social-casualty @shedreamswithstars @dr4g0ngirl @quinzzelx @shadowsingers-redhood @sirenpearldust @rhysandorian @starcrossedsan @spideytingley @historygeekqueen @starryhiraeth @fasoaurore @thegirlintheshadows101 @sleepylunarwolf @kalulakunundrum @mybestfriendmademe @emryb @63angel  @highladyivy @saltedcoffeescotch

#azriel x reader #azriel x you #acotar x reader #acotar #azriel

[lullabestie14]

Found this comment on Reddit. Couldn’t explain it better than this.

“It’s clear from Mist and Fury that the original ships were: Feysand, Nessian, Elucien, and Mor/Azriel. Like it’s so obvious the way she wrote Mor and Azriel; Mor even seems vaguely interested/torn about Az. Looking at interviews, SJM even talks about Elucien as a couple (eg where would they like to travel together, etc).

Flash forward to ACOWAR. For whatever reason (lack of chemistry with Az, wanting more diversity) SJM has Mor say that she prefers women. This time the Az-pining-for-Mor is more desperate/feels like a zero chance of being requited. SJM also introduces Az as a potential love interest for Elain because she loves throwing a wrench. Just because Elucien are mates doesn’t mean they’ll have it easy; SJM’s whole thing is angst. She had to throw in a love triangle to make it uncertain. This is the first couple where mate status is confirmed upon meeting.

But there’s a problem now. If Az and Mor are no longer endgame, who will they end up with? is it not suspicious that the two new characters introduced in SF (Gwyn and Emerie) just HAPPEN to be potentially be good partners for Az and Mor? Like it’s not a coincidence that Emerie looks at Mor and blushes, remarking how pretty she is. It’s not a coincidence that Az and Gwyn have so many interactions in the text. It’s not a coincidence that a “random side character” shows up in a bonus chapter.

When SJM created Gwyn and Emerie, it wasn’t just to give Nesta friends. These characters clearly didn’t exist when she wrote MAF. SJM wanted new characters that would solve her retcon of ending Az/Mor. She wanted to solve the Mor/Az retcon so bad that she created a NEW RETCON of Az going to Sangravah. Like why bother to add that detail if it’s not important.

Also: poor Lucien. His endgame heroine was supposed to be Nesta until SJM realized they would be terrible together and that Nessian had better chemistry. So she gives Elucien the mating bond. Like is she really going to fuck Lucien over TWICE? She loves him as a character and has put him through the wringer. Yes, I agree that SJM can change her mind and maybe is open to mate rejection, but Lucien has already switched love interests from Nesta to Elain! Who else is he going to switch to, considering that Jurian and Vassa are “at each other’s throats?”

Finally, please think about the number of books left. Ignoring novellas (which are probably gonna be fluffy ones like ACOFAS where nothing happens), there are two main books left. Two couples.

Option A:

• ⁠Gwynriel (Valkyrie growth, Illyrian rebellion, exploring Ramiel, Gwyn’s autumn heritage and maybe lightsinger?? powers)

• ⁠Elucien (Helion secret baby, defeating Koschei, freeing Vassa, fixing spring court)

Option B

• ⁠Elriel (mate rejection storyline, potentially some stuff above)

• ⁠?????

Literally WHO is the second book in this equation? Lucien and Vassa?? We barely know Vassa and there’s barely any connection to Night Court. And Lucien’s book is going to be depressing as fuck dealing with mate rejection; does anyone want to read two heavy books of rejection? Jurian and Vassa: again, we barely know them! At least with Tower of Dawn, Chaol had been a main character for a long time with POV. SJM will not do a full-length Emerie/Mor book as much as I would love for one. She’s very cognizant of criticism re: Mor bi rep in the past; she doesn’t want to open a can of worms and be accused of writing bad sapphic rep. If anything, I can see a fluffy Emerie/Mor novella with little angst (or them getting together in the background of other books).

So from a meta structural level, I don’t understand who the second couple will be if Elriel is endgame. Lucien/Vassa is the most plausible answer, but 1) we barely know Vassa, 2) she’s human and Lucien is immortal. So are we going to toss her into the Cauldron to make her immortal? Serious question, and 3) I don’t want TWO books about mate rejection, it’s depressing as hell. I can see one but not two.

But with Gwynriel and Elucien, you have enormous fan and audience interest in ALL FOUR CHARACTERS. They’re directly tied to Night Court and SJM so far has no intention of staying away from the core group.”

#acotar #elucien #gwynriel #sarah j maas #lucien vanserra #azriel #elain archeron #gwyneth berdara

[sunshinebingo]

@gwynrielweeksofficial Day 1 - Firsts

✨ Happy Gwynriel Weeks 2024 ✨

Synopsis: Gwyn musters up the courage to kiss the Shadowsinger.

Word Count: 1k

Read on Ao3

“I think the ending of the story could have been better…” Azriel explained.

“I see,” came out of Gwyn’s lips in response though her mind was thinking Do it.

“…but the characters are great,” he continued.

“Mhmm.”

Do it. I can’t. But I want to, her mind persisted.

Azriel kept giving his opinion about the book Gwyn had asked him to read a few days ago so they could discuss it together like they always did with every material that one recommended to the other. It was one of her favourite romance novels that she would recommend to anyone who was fond of the genre, or Spymasters who read romance only because their friends forced them to. But right now, Azriel could have been criticising it or ripping it to shreds that Gwyn would not have noticed.

“The main character is as stubborn as you. She is my favourite,” he said, the corners of his lips tugging into a smile. “I’d say my favourite parts are…”

Oh that smile. I want to taste it. I need to. Do it.

From the moment Azriel had started talking about that book, it had reminded Gwyn of all the time when she had read it too and had replaced the face of the love interest of the main character with that of Azriel. Hearing him talk of hand touches and secret rendezvous and stolen kisses was sending her mind into places she didn’t think he would be willing to follow. Gwyn had never been kissed before. And Mother above she wanted to know, for once in her life, what all the fuss was about. She wanted to know whether whatever fluttered inside her when she was near him would stop if she kissed him or whether the simple urge to kiss him would cease once she did it. She wondered if her eyes would finally stop being drawn to his lips.

If Azriel had not been looking at the novel that he was currently flipping through, he would have noticed that Gwyn was only half listening to what he was saying and that her gaze was glued onto his moving lips. He did, however, seem to notice that she was now much closer to him on the sofa than she was when they had sat down here some time ago.

“Berdara?” he asked as soon as he turned to look at her and noticed that the blush on her cheeks was much too intense to be justified by the temperature of the room since the open window of the private library had led the space to become quite chilly thanks to the cold breeze coming in.

Do it. Do it. Do it.

“Are you alright?” he asked, no doubt concerned by her silence as much as the strange look on her face.

Just do it once and forget about it, she thought. Do it. Do it. Do it.

Gwyn closed the little distance left between their bodies by gliding closer to him until her leg touched his. Gathering every ounce of courage she had built up to this point and telling herself that she would atone for her stupidity later, she placed a hand on his face and pressed her lips against his before he could finish saying her name.

The moment Gwyn felt how soft and perfect his lips were, she realised the terrible mistake that she was making. Her heartbeat increased, a sudden heat crept up her face and body as she slowly moved her lips against his. She was wrong. So very wrong. How could she think that one kiss would be enough? Who was she kidding? Why hadn’t she thought of the possibility that a single kiss would leave her wanting more, even as she still had her lips sealed to his?

She needed to stop before he pushed her away and asked what the hell was going on with her - why her hands were caressing his neck, why she was so close to him that her breasts were now pressed tight against his chest, why she wanted to jump on him, wrap her legs around his waist and beg him to deepen the kiss and teach her everything there was to know about pleasure. Those smutty novels must have turned her brain to mush. Perhaps she should take a break from them. Or perhaps she should read more to fill in the bigger gap that was forming between her need for him and actual reality.

Convinced that the hand he had brought to her waist was a request to stop, Gwyn pulled away, her eyes opening but staring down at her hands where she had placed them on her lap. Her internal monologue might have made it seem like the kiss had lasted for hours but it had only really been a few seconds. Maybe the memory of those few seconds would haunt her until the end of her days and the embarrassment would be her punishment.

When she looked up at Azriel, she found him staring back at her. His eyes were open wide, his mouth slightly parted and he seemed as though all coherent thoughts had been sucked from his beautiful head. Gwyn cleared her throat and stood up abruptly.

“I’m going to leave now before I lose my last shred of courage,” she said with as much firmness in her voice as she could muster.

With that, she turned on her heels and made her way to the door, leaving a dumbfounded Azriel behind. Her hand was already on the knob when a loud, “WAIT,” made her stop.

When she turned around, the sounds of Azriel’s rushed footsteps had already stopped and he stood before her. Gwyn didn’t have the time to take a full breath in before he wrapped a hand around her waist, grabbed her face with his other hand and kissed her.

#IT'S GWYNRIEL WEEKS #YAAAY!!! #gwynriel #gwyneth berdara #azriel shadowsinger #fluff #first kiss #gwynriel fic #pro gwynriel #gwynriel weeks 2024 #gwynrielweeks2024

[yazthebookish]

I avoid talking about the other ship specifically but I feel like letting my thoughts out on some arguments I see sometimes. Not that I have any interest in engaging in any discourse with the other side but it's my page so I can post whatever I feel like posting.

"Gwyn's purpose in the bonus chapter is to hint at her Lightsinger powers"

Okay, so you think one of the most important points about the bonus chapter is to prove Gwyn has luring powers so my question is what are the implications of that? Her drawing Azriel away from Elain? Azriel and Elain exposing her true powers in front of everyone to reveal she is the reason she's been keeping them apart? She is being manipulated by Merrill and Koschei? She has powers she's using unknowingly and can't control them so she'll need Az and Elain to help her?

You're setting up Gwyn to be prominent in an Azriel/Elain book because of her powers, so will they spend time dealing with other plotlines or mainly focus on Gwyn? Because that kind of thing definitely needs resolution since it directly impacts Nesta and the Valkyries dynamic.

So do Azriel and Elain's fantastic romance needs another female character to be used as a scapegoat to pin all their issues on her because the bonus chapter wasn't a good look on them? Or simply because his scene with Gwyn and with Clotho ended on a hopeful note than his scenes with Elain and Rhysand?

Gwyn is an irrelevant character and serves Nesta's story only.

But your argument is she has luring powers and is using them on Azriel, so will that go unaddressed? Then why would SJM throw hints about her powers if it won't mean anything?

Gwyn was used just as a marketing ploy in the bonus chapter.

She's considered a new character and no one knew she was in Azriel's bonus chapter and the bonus chapter was strictly advertised to be focused on Azriel, please be serious.

The bonus chapter is irrelevant.

The author confirmed she planted things in it specifically and in ACOSF in relation to Azriel so I would disagree. The great "forbidden romance" trope wouldn't exist without it and Azriel and Elain spoke to each other more in the bonus chapter than they ever did in the main book, I can pin-point the scene where they speak to each other only ONCE in a 800+ page book and it was about Nesta dancing with the Duke.

Gwyn has powers.

She's Fae of course she has powers but why is the immediate assumption that her powers are nefarious? She didn't harm any character and there was zero hints of her having any bad intentions towards anyone. She deals with survivor's guilt and her trauma, but she had many opportunities to let that evil secret side show but it never did. Why? Because she's obviously not set up to be an evil character or even one with questionable intentions. This is the same character who was ready to sacrifice herself to save her friends and stood by Nesta to face hateful males who wanted to k*ll them.

She's a Lightsinger.

Pretty easy to debunk because there is no correlation based on what we know and we never even see any Lightsingers. Even if she happens to be one, I believe it'll play out way differently than what some people try to push. And come on, Lightsinger and Shadowsinger? You think SJM wouldn't go for that dynamic? But for now I disagree with it since canon tells us they're monsters who k*ll for sport and Gwyn does none of that. Even if she had other different powers that are not wholly good, it's not a point of concern because many characters have questionable powers that did not erase the fact that they were good characters. It's like people never read fantasy books with characters who had dark powers but it didn't corrupt them, for some reason there's an insistence that Gwyn already caused harm despite the serious implications of having a character who is SA victim portrayed as someone luring other people against their will.

Azriel ended up at the library because Gwyn was singing during the service.

1. Clotho is seen at the service, so her being at her desk when Azriel shows up at the library is a good hint that the services didn't start yet.

2. For a singing power to work, the victim should be able to hear the singing and Azriel made no note of any singing at the library.

3. The image he sees of Gwyn's joy didn't pop up randomly, it was triggered by Clotho after she thanks him for the joy the gift will bring her and tells him that Gwyn deserves something as beautiful as this.

The shadows stay around him because they sense a threat but she's luring them.

How is she luring them when she's not even singing if it's been established that her singing has powers? Also, that statement contradicts what's in the text because the shadows were curious at start of the scene and by the end they were described to have calmed and were content to watch Gwyn. In ACOSF, they were seen dancing around Az when Gwyn addresses him.

Nesta reacted to Gwyn's singing the same way Azriel did.

Context matters and a lot of arguments that support this statement are always taken out of context. Nesta loves music so if she is going to admire Gwyn's beautiful voice, it'll be simply for that and nothing more.

There is no way to 100% pin point what caused Nesta to have visions of the Prison during the services but it doesn't only have to be Gwyn's singing but also the lyrics which were found under Level Seven and are written in an ancient language. When Nesta gets the vision she says she can visualize what the song spoke of, meaning the song itself could be talking about story of the Prison/Land of Dusk.

"But Azriel's shadows reacted to her singing"

— "How was the party?" Her breath curled in front of her mouth, and one of his shadows darted out to dance with it before twirling back to him. Like it heard some silent music.

Silent music, not singing. Not song. Just like how Hunt mentioned hearing some beautiful music between his and Bryce's souls. Just like how Nesta and Cassian when they consummated their bond heard the music between their souls. Strong sign of Mateism friends.

"But Azriel still heard a beautiful singing, not just music."

— Azriel entered the warmth of the stairwell, and as he descended, he could have sworn a faint, beautiful singing followed him. Could have sworn his shadows sang in answer.

Could she be singing? Maybe though unlikely since she returned to training to cut the ribbon right after he left. If she did, maybe the shadows like her voice? Maybe that's a sign they're fond of her? And if it's not maybe that's another sign that the singing they're hearing is the mating bond, which was once described as the Song of the Soul.

The Shadows having a reaction to singing isn't necessarily a bad sign, we saw them dance to Azriel's humming in HOFAS.

Gwyn returned to the library, her story is over.

I have to assume you haven't read ACOSF or skimmed it if that's the conclusion you came to, because there were clear signs that not only Gwyn but Emerie have ongoing journeys and they will leave where they are right now to see the world outside. Gwyn literally states at around the 70%-80% mark that she's sick of staying in the library for two years and wants to leave. She returned to the library because that's her current residence and where she works, it's not like she'll immediately move out right after facing the Blood Rite. This is one argument I can't take seriously because it clearly contradicts what canon points out and I think it's mostly out of convenience to invalidate any discussions about her healing journey and incomplete arc.

Casual readers don't even ship Azriel and Gwyn and have no knowledge about the bonus chapter

A lot of casual readers do in fact see a potential in Azriel and Gwyn as a romantic pairing because they have canon interactions in ACOSF. Plenty of readers shipped them even before they read the bonus chapter. Casual readers are dismissed when they address that and are claimed to be hardcore shippers that hate Elain when it's not the case since they just point out what they think is the obvious in the book to them. Every casual reader will have a different opinion but for some reason if theirs is not in favor of Elain and Azriel, they'll be dismissed so that says much.

Just a hot take that I wanted to put out there since I'll be avoiding fandom discourse moving on (unless I feel like it Lol).

#gwynriel

[bookishly-ariel]

As someone who read the Acotar series once, I dove into the sailboat my brain branded Elriel and by the end of Acomaf I realized it wasn't a small sail boat anymore.

By the time Azriel flew her to the house of wind the boat was decorated with Cobalt sails, flowers, and shadows. At end of Acomaf it was built for the deep seas of a shipping war I knew I'd eventually have to sail through if I wanted to enjoy online content of them.

By the end of Acosf I was looking out across that ocean from a Destroyer.

And through it all my love for the story and the characters was not overshadowed by the ship I had built from the small moments given between two characters who were briefly shown through the eyes of Feyre, Rhysand, Nesta, and Cassian but mostly through Sjm's words.

I loved Feyre's story, but I did not hate her sisters, I did hate her father, tamlin, and more of a dislike for his decision to let Tamlin bring Feyre beyond her breaking point and still support him, Lucien.

(Yes, I loved that papa archeron showed up and saved the day, still mad it took Fae intervention and healing to get him there but Feyre still loved him anyways. Tamlin's help at Hyberns camp was the only thing I let slide cause he owed it to them. Lucien . . . Well, I don't forgive him turning his eye on all the bullshit, but I do hope we get to see him grow and I do have a small ship in my head for him and vassa and a small enjoyment on how him and Gwyn would be as friends if not partners.)

I loved Nesta's story, but I supported them having an intervention because she was killing herself and through her healing, the friends she made and she found herself along the way. Actions taken by Nesta did upset me but so to did the actions and choices of others in the book.

(This book was therapeutic to the eldest daughter in me who was a shit sister to her own baby sister till something happened and we patched our relationship.)

I know I will love Elain's story, but I am content in my knowledge that Feyre shipped Azriel and Elain, humored it aloud to Rhys even.

Nesta wasn't blind either, she too realized her friend was distant and when finding out why she did not chase him off or shut down his feelings and neither did she blast him to the whole Inner circle. She understood and offered a small comfort.

I don't know how anyone who has read the books over and over cannot see beyond the sails of their sail boats.

These characters are more than their ships, and to claim your thoughts and opinions as those of the characters is baffling.

All this to say, You don't decide that someone can't be a Nesta Stan and support Elriel because "Nesta would never"

It's right there in A Court of Silver Flames, did you not read the book? I'm just saying, Nesta is many things but she isn't the type of woman to bite her tongue when she disapproves of something.

It's right there in the books, just saying.

#elain x azriel #nesta archeron #pro elriel #pro elain archeron #pro azriel #elriel #just saying

[sjmgirlie]

“I see so much potential for Lucien and Elain”

Where?

There has not been a single scene in 2 novels and 1 novella since we found out they were mates that alludes to any potential at all?

They haven’t even had one conversation where Feyre isn’t there carrying it? He lives on the other side of Prythian? Can't stand to be around her? She wants to leave the room each time he's there? Specifically sits away from him? Like where is the potential other than some sort of imagery (which I'll get to)? It ain't there.

“I can’t imagine a single conversation happening between Elain and Azriel”

Really?

They had one the first day they met. Talking about flying.

Not to mention on Solstice they stayed up to talk to each other when everyone else went to bed.

How do we know they didn’t talk when they were in the garden together?

“Azriel just stifles Elain. She’s just a damsel in distress”

You sure?

He literally gave her the knife he had literally never let anyone touch in 500 years to protect herself? Cassian didn’t want Nesta finding the troves either? Are we trying to say that a man who wants to protect a women is suddenly.. unattractive? Like idk about you, but I would love for a bat boy to save me lol. Or tell me not to do something for my safety. But okay.

“It’s just lust”

Let’s not even go there because a male willing to participate in a blood duel and renouncing his own religion is not just trying to have sex

“Lucien is the son of Helion and Elain needs sun!”

Ya?

Well Lucien has never had sun imagery. It’s fire from his Autumn Court heritage and in Hybern he released himself with SPELLS. Feyre was actually the person to cast out a bright light to break the wards, and we find out later that it’s a gift from the Dawn court. Lucien tells us this. Lucien has fire magic and is a spell cleaver, not the sun. ELAIN is the sun. Day court does not equal sun for Lucien. Sorry.

“Elain will never accept Azriel’s profession”

Oh?

Pretty sure she’s already accepted everyone in the Night Court. They all have jobs that are borderline sus. And considering the countless instances where we see Elain is actually very observant, I’m sure she knows what he does, yet she still leans into his touch. Not to mention Mr. fashion police Cassian also tells us that Elain is not a loyal dog. That she saw everything Nesta did and understood. Doesn't seem like she's not accepting to me.

"Azriel just wants a mate!!"

Seriously?

If the male wants a mate why would he bother spending time with a female he knows has one? Why wouldn't he be sailing around Prythian looking for her? Because she sure as shit isn't in the Night Court. And let's be honest, I don't think he will even be getting a mate if it's not Elain through some sort of different bond. Because there is no one in canon right now that could be his mate, and we only have 2 more novels and 1 novella left. And his book is next. Apparently we can all agree on that, but can't accept Elain is also getting the next book, aka their book together. And no, Gwyn is not his mate, because it would have already snapped into place. We had an 800 page book where they were in the vicinity of each other through all the training monologues (so maybe more 400 pages) and it didn't happen? Rhys knew before they left under the mountain. Literally happened at the end of the book. Cassian knew the first day he met Nesta. Lucien knew the second Elain took her first breath lol... it's not happening.

"Elain should be with Lucien and they would be High Lord and Lady of Day Court!!"

Ew?

You want to kill off Helion??? I want the novella to be about him and the Lady of Autumn tbh (even though it's likely Mor). Like? No, I need some sort of scene with Helion in each remaining book. I need more of him, biblically and spiritually. Also, have we forgotten “You can not resent my decision to lead a small quiet life..” ??? Elain said this in ACOSF to Nesta, like, do you think this girl wants to be High Lady all of a sudden? No. She doesn't.

"Elain needs to give Lucien a chance!!"

Why?

I swear everyone who says this has never been in that "Oh, well he's just such a nice guy!! Give him a chance" type of situation. Like why should I? WHY SHOULD SHE? He literally was an accomplice in her human life being stripped away from her. Should they end up being friends? Yes. Together romantically? No. If she doesn't want to give him a chance, which she clearly doesn't, then she doesn't need to. Stop diminishing choice in character arcs. Her whole arc, with Azriel and Lucien, is centred around choice in the first place.

"Azriel's shadows danced for Gwyn, so they are endgame"

Huh?

Don't get me wrong, the shadows are a part of Azriel, but I don't think they literally determine his life for him. Actually, I know this 100%. His shadows are under his command. Also, they danced for her breath, not Gwyn. Which is weird. Not to mention his shadows alert him in times of trouble and to gain information. Is it not weird they didn't alert him that she was there? Like that's not being wing-shadowy, that's screaming something sus is going on. (And no, I'm not anti-gwyn or even saying she's evil. Is she a lightsinger? Probably. The evidence is there. Does it mean she's bad? No.)

"Azriel's shadows hide from Elain, so they can't be together"

Lol?

Again, are Azriel's shadows the ones that command him? Or does he command them? And his shadows have disappeared for half of the IC. They disappear when there is no threat. They disappear when he doesn't want them there. Pretty sure Azriel's whole character doesn't just revolve around shadows. Sure, they are a huge part of his identity so far, but do we truly think that he wants to be reduced to them? Doubt it. He's probably had a very hard time coming to terms with the fact people have always looked at him differently because of it. I wouldn't be surprised if him becoming a Shadowsinger (since they came to him later in life in the dungeon) was a result of unfathomable trauma. Azriel does not only equal shadows only. We just don't know him yet.

"The BC sunk Eriel"

Truly?

You mean the bonus chapter where Azriel was about to get on his knees for a taste? The bonus chapter where Elain was giving him offer and permission? The bonus chapter where Rhys was the reason they DIDN'T actually kiss? The bonus chapter where Rhys became their obstacle and lifted the stakes not only on a personal level (with Elain thinking she was rejected, with Az and Rhys having a wedge between them) and politically (the potential downfall with god knows how many courts since Lucien is a drifter and the human lands)? Like we need the stakes!!!! This is what makes it worthwhile to read?? Forbidden romance? That should be enough intrigue. Plus anyone who genuinely thinks an author would write a male character willing to drop to his knees for a female (we've seen this with both Rhys and Cassian btw) only to have him move on in the next book is just idk. It's not possible. It would be so UNROMANTIC for them not to end up together. Like I would never forget Azriel wanted Elain's coochie so bad only to end up with someone else??? Ya, that's not romantic.

"Elain and Tamlin would be perfect mates"

Throws Up

So Elain is going to go to the only court where there is no gardening because the HL magic keeps everything in eternal bloom, only to shack up with her sister's ex who that same sister almost married and her mates ex best friend? Make it make sense. You're truly showing your hatred for stereotypical feminine qualities my friend. Tamlin needs some time to lick his wombs and maybe learn how to cook. He needs to stop isolating himself. And again, Elain is not his mate. Also, let's just add Elain is not ever leaving the Night Court. The series is about the Archeron sisters, and her sister is the literal High Lady of NC, not to mention her other sister is mated to the Illyrian General. Like be for real right now.

The End. 🌹🗡❤️🦇

#eriel #pro eriel #elain x azriel #elain #anti gwynriel #anti elucien #i thought it was obvious #it is sarah #just clearly not for everyone

[i-sneezed]

Some Elriel evidence that doesn't get much attention.

First of all, if you're just having fun with your ships, you do you, man. I'm not here to rain on your parade.

However, there are so many people out there that are CONVINCED of Elucien/Gwynriel that I can't take it anymore and I have to throw in my two cents, so here we go. I'm gonna break it down by ship.

Elucien

There's no way, bro. And we can set aside the fact that if that ship were to sail it would be the same sort of love story as Nessian (reluctant mates).

The most obvious thing to discuss here is that Elain is clearly not interested. And neither, to some extent, is Lucien.

Let's look back to ACOWAR when Lucien talks to Elain in the library. He thinks about Jesminda. "[She] had loved him without question, without hesitation. She had chosen him. Elain had been...thrown at him."

Like Azriel, Lucien wants to be chosen. He's had it before and he sees the value in it. Unfortunately, he's a fae male and he has a hard time ignoring his instincts where his mate is concerned, so he keeps trying. Even though he can hardly stand to be in the same room as her. Whereas Vassa...

Elain, on the other hand, has absolutely no interest in a mating bond. After Graysen breaks her heart in ACOWAR, Feyre says, "Some sliver of hope had been shattered today. That Graysen would still love her, marry her--and that love would trump even a mating bond."

Obviously, that quote is in direct reference to her ex-fiance, but we see Elain reconfirm that desire in ACOFAS when she tells Feyre explicitly that she doesn't want a mate. I don't think it's personal to Lucien, I think she rejects the idea of being told who she should be with. Of being robbed of choice.

We learn from Nesta in ACOSF that their mother always said Elain would marry for "love and beauty". I think for Elain, a mating bond is not the same as love. Also, small aside, but who is constantly regarded as the most beautiful of the bat boys?

We haven't seen them have a conversation about their mating bond yet because why would we? That will happen in Elain's book (which is most likely next).

Gwynriel

I feel like this one is more dangerous to get into so I'll tread lightly.

Firstly, the majority of evidence for this ship comes from a bonus chapter that the majority of the fandom doesn't even know exists. Anyone who listens to the audiobooks doesn't know about it unless they poke around ACOTAR stuff online.

It doesn't make sense for an author to essentially change the entire trajectory of a story in a bonus chapter that most people don't know about.

Also, I think a big problem with the BC is that people read it after they finish the book, so it can feel like the most recent thing to happen in the story, but it's not. It happens about 2/3 of the way through ACOSF and a lot happens after that.

But before we get into that, let's talk about the shadows. People lose their damn minds that Az's shadows dance for Gwyn and vanish for Elain. The truth of it is that we don't know what dancing shadows actually mean, though. It's the first time we've seen it happen. However, we have seen his shadows vanish for someone other than Elain.

In ACOMAF, when Feyre meets the IC for the first time, they vanish for Mor. "Mor patted Azriel on the shoulder as she dodged his outstretched wing...The lurking shadows vanished entirely as Azriel's head dipped a bit."

So we know that the shadows vanish in the presence of someone Azriel has romantic feelings for, but we don't know what makes them dance.

Then, at the end of the BC (after he said he didn't even consider Gwyn to be a friend) he feels a spark of joy in his chest. Good. My shadow man deserves happiness.

But we know that it doesn't last because at the very next training right after Solstice, Neta comments that Az is "More aloof than usual" which clearly shows us that he is far more hung up on what happened with Elain than whatever may or may not be going on with Gwyn.

For her part, Gwyn becomes more comfortable around Azriel after Solstice. We love to see it because the poor girl has been so traumatized and, like Az, she deserves to be happy.

However, at no point does Nesta or Cassian suspect there to be any romantic connection between them. Not like how Nesta did with Az and Elain. ("His secret to tell. Never hers.").

And then at the climax of the book, Gwyn is thrown into the Blood Rite. At no point is Az even half as frantic as Cassian (which a mate would be) and he is way more preoccupied with whatever's going on with Eris.

At the end, when Nesta is getting ready for her mating ceremony, Gwyn tells her that she's not ready to leave the House of Wind again. Poor thing has been re-traumatized because of what happens in the BR and can't stand to leave the House. And y'all think she's ready for any kind of romantic relationship??

Nah, let Gwyn heal without the influence of a male.

Elriel

So I'm got gonna talk about the rescue, him figuring out she's a seer, giving her Truth Teller, or any of the usual stuff because that's been said and said and I have nothing to add to it.

Instead, I want to talk about what I believe their trope will be and share my evidence with the class. Cool? Cool.

Okay, so, I think we all know that if Elriel is endgame then their trope will be forbidden lovers.

Personally, I am of the opinion that the purpose of Az's bonus chapter was to confirm that for us, not suddenly change the entire trajectory of the story.

But forbidden lovers makes so much sense for Elriel because of what we've seen in the books, not just the BC.

Looking at ACOMAF again, Mor tells Feyre, "'Azriel's got no shortage of lovers, though, don't worry. He's just better at keeping them secret than we are.'"

Then, in ACOSF, when Feyre's talking about how Elain figured out she was pregnant first, she says to Azriel, "'I think she's got you beat for secret-keeping'".

So it's already in-canon that Azriel can keep his lovers secret very well and that Elain is just good at secrets in general.

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE

A moment I never see anyone talk about is something that Cassian observes at a family dinner. "Elain had already departed with Feyre, claiming she had to be up with the dawn to tend to an elderly faerie's garden. Cassian didn't know why he suspected this wasn't true. There had been some tightness in Elain's face when she said it. Normally when she made such excuses, Lucien was around, but the male remained in the human lands with Jurian and Vassa."

Elain already has secrets the IC aren't privy to. So what's one more?

#elriel #elain x azriel #elain archeron #azriel #lucien vanserra #gwyneth berdara #acotar #fandom ships

[dawneternal]

Just a Favor

✦ A Gwynriel first kiss one-shot (turned into multiple parts after requests for more)

✦ Inspired by a true story 🫣 when I started dating my wife in high school I had never been kissed before and she kept very politely asking if she could kiss me and I kept getting too nervous and saying no. That went on for like two months and then I finally told her to kiss me without asking or I'd keep saying no lol and she did. The end

✦ Word Count: 1.7k

✦ AO3 Link / Masterlist

"I have a favor to ask you," Gwyn's voice pulled Azriel from his thoughts.

She sat across from him at the kitchen table, half-eaten plates of lunch in front of them. The Valkyries had stayed for lunch after training, Gwyn lingering after Cassian had left to fly Emerie home. Nesta had excused herself to find a book for Gwyn, leaving the pair alone.

Azriel had not thought anything of this sequence of events, but now that he was looking at the Gwyn, head tilted to the side with an inquisitive gleam in her eye, he was finding it all suspicious.

"It's kind of an unconventional thing, so prepare yourself." Gwyn continued. He took note of her fingers fiddling with a buckle on her leathers.

"Okay," Azriel said slowly, resisting the urge to furrow his brows. Or maybe run away.

"Are you prepared?"

"Yes, I won't react."

"I want to be kissed."

True to his word, Azriel's face remained unchanged. Though his stomach had done a flip and his heartbeat thundered.

"Okay, you can react a little," Gwyn cried, indignant and incredulous.

"Are you asking me to kiss you?" Azriel surprised himself with his own calm tone.

"Either that, or help me find someone. Because I trust you to help me find someone who isn't an asshole." She had shrunk into herself a little, like her confidence had waned. Her gaze drifted down to her plate.

"Why me, though?" The corners of his mouth quirked up just a touch.

"Nesta hates everyone, Emerie only knows Illyrians and they hate Valkyries, Cassian is Cassian, and I'm not asking my High Lord or Lady to find someone to kiss me."

They were all fair arguments. He didn't bother asking why she wanted to be kissed so desperately. All of her actions pointed toward wanting to move on. He'd overheard the Valkyries several times encouraging Gwyn toward what they called 'the last step' - moving out of the library.

"I'll do it," Az said, cursing his voice for cracking. How could she unnerve him so?

She was just a woman. Except that a singular word could not fully capture what Gwyn was. Priestess, Valkyrie, Carynthian, she was something incredible. The most brightly colored thing in his life. Copper hair, turquoise eyes, white ribbons, auburn freckles.

Gwyn cheered and gave him a triumphant, toothy grin. He could not help smiling in return.

"What do you want me to do?" He asked, unsure how to proceed.

"I just want you to kiss me like you would anyone you really liked," Gwyn was blushing, now. Eyes a little wild, like she hadn't expected to get this far.

"That doesn't really tell me what you want," Azriel protested.

He picked at a leftover sliver of sandwich to give his hands something to do. His shadows buzzed with energy, darting to far corners of the room and reporting back about the dust that lived there.

"Well...what was your first kiss like?" Gwyn asked. She smiled at one shadow that approached her outstretched hand like a shy kitten.

"Probably not what you'd want," Azriel flashed a sheepish grin, still embarrassed by the centuries-old memory, "It was pretty bad. This will be your first kiss?"

"Yes," Gwyn kept her gaze on the tendril of shadow weaving through her fingers. "I think maybe I don't want you to ask me first,"

"I always ask before I kiss someone, no matter how I feel about them."

"Well, the problem is that if you ask, I might chicken out and say no," She sighed, "So I may need you to just do it."

"Ah," Azriel grinned, "I see. You want me to make it a moment."

Before she could answer, he stood and crossed to her in a few strides, turning her chair to face him and bracing one hand on the back of it. Gwyn looked up at him, eyes wide, lips parted. He leaned in close, nose a few inches from hers. Somehow, her nervousness had cancelled his out and returned his confidence. At the very least, he knew he was capable of making her first kiss better than his had been.

"I have no qualms with a surprise, if that's what you want." He said, deep voice rumbling in his chest.

"Yes," Gwyn whispered, heart hammering in anticipation.

This close, she could count every freckle scattered over his bronze skin. There was a beauty mark she had never seen before right on the edge of his full bottom lip, and glimmers of gold in his amber eyes. She hoped desperately that he could not hear the catch of her breath.

Azriel stayed still for a moment, gaze fixed on hers, letting her wonder if this was the moment. A part of her hoped that it wasn't, just so she could feel this again, have another chance to memorize his features. To breathe his piney scent, feel his shadows caress her skin.

Perhaps she should have just asked him to help her find a stranger.

Azriel straightened, flashed an insufferable smirk, and walked out of the room. Gwyn heard his footsteps echo down the hall, leaving her alone in the silent kitchen. She felt as though a summer storm had just rolled through her world, dark and alluring and thrilling all at once.

Nesta, with her brilliant intuition, returned a moment later, squealing when she took in Gwyn's red cheeks.

A few nights later, after a family dinner at the River House, a little group set out to the far corner of the estate. There, a little branch of the Sidra curved through the meadow before pouring back into the sea. A small stone bridge crossed over it, leading to an ivy covered gazebo. Azriel, Cassian, Nesta, and Mor all set out to get a moment of fresh air and a glimpse of the moonlight dancing on the water.

Gwyn followed, giggling with the group at Mor's tipsy stumbling and Cassian's booming voice declaring that he could definitely skip a rock father than the rest of them. This, of course, illicited a challenge and they all began a search for perfect rocks. Gwyn was particularly skilled at skipping stones and giddy at the idea of surprising the group with her talent and wiping the smirk from Cassian's face.

But just as she stepped over the little stone bridge, a hand grasped her arm and whirled her around. She found herself in Azriel's arms, among the swaying grass and delicate flowers. They stood halfway down the bank of the stream, Azriel's boots braced against the slope, holding them upright. The mossy stone bridge hid them from sight, only the tops of their heads visible if the rest of the group bothered to look.

It took Gwyn a moment to register what had happened, to calm her heart and adjust to the feeling of the shadowsinger's arms wrapped around her waist. He smiled down at her, moonlight gleaming in his hazel eyes. This was the moment.

Azriel softly placed his hands on her face and pulled her in a little closer. He was silent, giving her long moments to stop him if she wished. But she tucked herself into him, hands resting on his chest, fingertips just brushing the skin above his collar. She blushed deep red, looking up at him through lowered lashes, though the glimmer in her eye was eager.

Azriel could not help but notice how perfectly she fit in his hold, like her face and his hands had once been a single block of marble, the curve between them cut with a single motion. Something about it so familiar, so deeply rooted it felt almost ancient. Sacred.

And Gwyn could not help the feeling that bloomed in her chest when he brought his lips to hers. Soft, sweet, reverant. His touch was warm, every place where they connected sent sparks through her body.

She knew, deep down, was no fleeting feeling. This was the feeling of something beginning. Perhaps this was a spectacularly stupid idea, after all, as she was certain that no other kiss would ever feel this way.

Azriel pulled away, thumb brushing over her cheek. The moment he met her eyes, he felt it. It was nothing like he thought it would be. Neither pain nor pleasure, something so unique there was only one thing that it could be. Gwyn glowed before him, her aura golden. So bright, the star his whole being now orbited.

He knew he looked like a fool. Gasping, chest heaving like her kiss had hurt him. And the concern on her face stung, because it meant she had not felt it, too.

"Azriel?" She whispered, her rose-tinted stupor fading. Azriel let go of her, hands dropping stiffly to his sides. His skin burned, already craving more of her touch.

"How do you feel?" He croaked, though he knew the answer. She did not feel as he did, no matter how much she had liked it.

"Are you okay?" She asked, instead of answering. Her hands still rested against his chest, and now her fingers curled around his shirt collar, holding tight. He looked like he was beginning to panic.

Azriel shook his head, wings spreading out with a snap. It was too much. The sorrow, the longing, the roaring joy. Subtle hints of her own emotions drifting down the newly forged bond.

Mind swirling, he placed a hand on his chest and stepped back. He opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out. Just staring at the dazzling girl before him, who had been so shy about being kissed. Surely she would not be happy about such an intense bond, not be ready. And she had asked him for a kiss because she cared so little for him. She had hoped for a kiss that would not matter. No, she would not want this.

He could only think of one word and it was likely the only thing he should not say. Instead of saying anything, he shot upwards into the sky, disappearing as a dark smudge in the night. A single streak of blue in the darkness.

Gwyn was left alone, hands hovering where he had been. Confused, concerned, and entirely unaware of the bond singing in Azriel's chest.

#gwynriel #gwyn berdara #gwyneth berdara #Azriel #azriel acotar #azriel shadowsinger #shadowsinger #gwyn x azriel #acotar #acotar fanfic #acotar fanfiction #acotar oneshot #a court of silver flames #first kiss #acosf #azriel #gwyn acotar #gwynriel oneshot #gwynriel one shot #valkyries

[acourtofthought]

But what does that mean, exactly?

The ribbon was a test to see if someone was ready for something.

If you can complete the test, you're ready for more. No matter how quickly you accomplish it.

Gwyn is completely focused on accomplishing the task.

Gwyn not only achieves exactly what she set out to to do (going so far as to practice when everyone else is sleeping) but...

She achieved with a warriors spirit and didn't treat it like it was just a game.

So then what does it mean when Nesta tells Az he's Gwyn's new ribbon?

Az and Cassian laid down a challenge for the Valkyries, then he and Cassian stood off to the side smiling when they knew it was going to be difficult for them to achieve. But it was only Az that Gwyn taunted in response.

Nesta didn't say the obstacle was the new ribbon, she said Az was which to me means that Gwyn will be approaching him with the same determination she did the ribbon.

First off, we're told that it doesn't matter how quickly something is achieved, when you're ready you're ready "even if they'd only been training for a little while". That's for all the Gwynriel haters who claim she couldn't be ready for a sexual relationship when it's time for her book because of how "kinky" Az is.

Second, Az is closed off, he really doesn't open up to anyone (even Cassian), he believes no one could accept his darkness. There's a line that says only Mor was able to get Az to say anything after badgering him. So Gwyn, with a single minded focus when it came to the ribbon, is not going to be put off by Azriel's challenging and quiet nature. Gwyn doesn't care how difficult something is, she's not deterred and she'll get him to open up one way or another.

Third, though she's competitive and enjoys taking on the challenge, she doesn't treat it lightly. She didn't cut the ribbon and break down into giggles as if it were all just a game. She was serious about having achieved what she set out to do and continued her pursuit of wanting to become a Valkyrie.

Lucien once said of Jesminda:

She had teased him, taunted him—seduced him so thoroughly that he hadn’t wanted anything but her.

I know people try to twist the Gwyn narrative, that her singing has lured and seduced the good guys but that is NOT how SJM writes the best friends of her main characters. It was clear from the start that Ianthe wasn't a true friend to Feyre. It was obvious Maeve wasn't likeable from her first moments on page.

Az chased Mor and he was the one to initiate the near kiss with Elain (I'm pretty sure she would have never taken control of the situation with him) but SJM likes the girl in charge for the first time. Feyre initiated her first kiss with Rhys. Nesta grabbed Cassian and pulled him to her. Rowan waited for Aelin to kiss him and we have the same with Quinlar. Lucien's POV clearly demonstrates he enjoyed Jesminda's pursuit of him.

"Seducing" a love interest isn't a bad thing in certain context, in ACOMAF, Feyre wonders why Rhys never seduced her with looks and smiles (and Rhys was a SA victim too). She wanted that from him. So Gwyn pursuing Az doesn't make her evil, it makes her 99% of every guy's dream, especially one who has never had a female chase after him.

Az might be Gwyns new ribbon, she might be the one to taunt and tease him and maybe she'll be the one to pursue him (especially when we know Az is aware of her history) but Gwyns character has shown that she's not flighty. She commits to something and once accomplished, she focuses on how to get better.

By the end of SF, she is still committed to becoming a Valkyrie as it's confirmed Az and Cassian compiled a list of things they did wrong in the Rite.

If Az is Gwyns new ribbon, there's little chance she's not going to succeed 🤷

Elain might have had a real crush on Az or maybe she was just trying to prove to herself she could feel something for someone other than her mate (It's doubtful she's not drawn to Lucien though I think she's trying to pretend she's not). But in the end, she easily walked away from whatever happened on Solstice and there was zero indication it was a struggle for her to do that (versus the very obvious tension filled reactions she and Lucien have toward one another).

It's not that Elain isn't capable of fighting for someone and she's definitely a worthy someone to be had but we're not going to see it until she's with the right person. And the author has already made it clear which of the two females is going to be all in with Az.

#pro gwynriel #gwynriel #acotar mates #pro elucien #gwyn acotar #azriel x gwyn #gwyneth berdara

[theclayr07]

Common negative perceptions of Azriel need to be addressed, specifically that he is some incel fuckboi that feels entitled to Elain who he only wants to sleep with anyway. I will address each of these points and demonstrate that nothing could be further from the truth.

1) He's not an incel. AZ has never behaved in a way that is inappropriate or showed disrespect for another woman's boundaries. Being in love with someone who doesn't feel the same for you is not a crime. You can't help who you have feelings for. What is wrong is to actively try to impose those feelings on a woman when she has made it clear she is not interested. First off Mor, herself, has said she could strip naked in front of Azriel and he would do nothing about it. Furthermore, she and Azriel have never had the conversation where she makes it clear that she is not interested in him. Azriel made a move on Elain after she gave her clear consent to him. There was nothing creepy about acting on clear consent.

2) Then there is the claim that he is a fuckboi. He has been interested in the same female for 500 years. He obviously doesn't fall for every woman that comes along, because he is desperate to be with someone. Elain is the first time he has been interested in someone else which in itself should be significant. There is no evidence in canon that Azriel changes his mind and then is suddenly interested in Gwyn because he flits from female to female.

3) Az does not feel entitled to Elain. Those are Rhys' words. They are obviously not true because earlier in the bonus chapter, Az's inner dialogue talks about how Az is unworthy of Elain and that his feelings should be wrong. AZ is conflicted. According to the rules of Fae society, he should not pursue someone who has a mate, but he feels such a strong connection with her he is willing to question everything he has ever believed in, which brings me to the next point.

4) Az's feelings definitely go beyond a sexual interest. If Az wants sex, he will have no problem getting it. He does not need to jump through an obscene amount of hoops for two years to get it. He definitely would not risk his life for a lay or stare longingly into gardens, talk for hours about things he's not the least bit interested in, or start to avoid the person when his feelings get overwhelming. AZ has never believed he had a future with anyone. When Cassian asks Az if he wants children, he says it doesn't matter what he wants. He believes he will never have the opportunity to have them so why bother thinking about it. When Az encounters Elain at solstice, he does not believe he will get to do anything more than kiss her in that moment so he never let himself dare think of a future with her before that. That is why he told Rhys he never planned anything more.

Az is by no means a saint. He does bottle up his emotions until he can't control them anymore. He does not like being told what to do. (Which makes me think he is not going to give up on Elain.) He does have major self-esteem issues which causes him to be self-destructive, but he is not toxic towards women. Why would SJM make one of the bat boys like that in the first place. It makes no sense especially if he was going to be a romantic interest in future books.

#acotar #azriel #elain archeron #elriel #elain x azriel #pro azriel

[starsreminisce]

The bonus chapters do provide context and throwbacks to the main books, and it's frustrating to think they wouldn't impact the overall story. After all, the ACOMAF bonus chapter cemented Nessian's relationship and added depth to their story. SJM excels at weaving these elements seamlessly. Therefore, it feels like a step backward to argue that Elain will face a choice when the bonus chapter clearly shows Azriel's feelings for her and his developing friendship with Gwyn.

Elain demonstrably showed interest in Azriel, but he rejected her. Rhys reminded Azriel that Elain and Lucien still have a bond, and Lucien has the right to defend it. Elain returned his necklace, which Azriel then gave to Gwyn.

Both ACOSF bonus chapters establish context. Azriel's chapter clarifies his sullen behavior at the solstice, and Gwyn starts calling him "Shadowsinger" after he reveals the title. Feyre's chapter explains their choice of the name Nyx for their son.

Therefore, it's confusing why SJM would regress Elain and Azriel's interactions. The bonus chapter clearly showed Azriel hurting Elain to the point of returning his gift. Additionally, it focused on his growing investment in Gwyn. Elain's book likely won't start with a love triangle involving Lucien and Azriel. The bonus chapter suggests Elain has already made her choice.

Ideally, Elain's book will explore her reasons for accepting Azriel's rejection and delve into her feelings for her true mate. Most importantly, we should see Elain stand up for herself against Azriel. This is the third time he's acted without considering her, similar to how Tomas motivated Nesta to overcome her fear.

ACOMAF Bonus Chapter:

He didn’t care. Didn’t give a shit as she rose up on her toes, her mouth nearing his— Pain exploded between his legs, knocking the breath from his chest as that gods- damned knee of hers indeed found its mark. Cassian staggered back, swearing viciously. She snorted, looking down at him as he fell on his ass into an armchair, clutching his stomach, trying to reorder his brain— “You’re all the same,” she said, imperious as the night and cold as the dawn. “Perhaps being an immortal makes you predictable.”

In ACOMAF:

I’d had one break from Cassian’s brutal training—just one morning, when he’d flown to the human realm to see if my sisters had heard from the queens and deliver another letter from Rhys to be sent to them. I assumed seeing Nesta went about as poorly as could be imagined, because my lesson the following morning was longer and harder than it’d been in previous days. I’d asked what, exactly, Nesta had said to him to get under his skin so easily. But Cassian had only snarled and told me to mind my own business, and that my family was full of bossy, know-it-all females.

In ACOSAF:

He didn’t know why the hell he cared. Why he’d bothered. Even from the start. Even after she’d kneed him in the balls that one afternoon at her father’s house.

ACOMAF Bonus Chapter:

No, she had not been with any male, Fae or human. Tomas had wanted to, and she . . . some part of her had known no future lay with him. Knew about his hateful father, and that he did nothing to prevent the man from beating his mother. She had barely let Tomas kiss her, and that day when she had ended it, he’d . . . She swallowed, shutting out the memory of what he’d said and done. The sound of her tearing dress. No—it hadn’t gone that far, but . . . The blind terror in those moments he’d tried, before she’d screamed and clawed her way free. And never told anyone. Something must have shown on her face, in her scent. Because his annoyance vanished—no, it shifted. Into something else, something . . . Rage. That’s what stilled Cassian’s face. Pure, burning rage.

In ACOSF:

Three days afterward, Nesta broke it off with Tomas. Enraged, he’d launched himself at her, pinning her against the enormous woodpile stacked along the barn wall. Spiteful whore, he’d growled. You think you’re better than me? Acting like a queen when you haven’t got shit. She’d never forget the sound of her dress tearing, the greed in his eyes as his hands pawed at her skirts, trying to raise them as he fumbled with the buckle on his belt.

#elucien #pro elucien #elain x lucien #antie/riel #antielriel #gwynriel

[kayla-2]

Well jokes on you because Elriel is obviously not happening. It was so obvious in the bonus chapter that Gwyn and Az will end up together, maybe it was hard for you to analyze it? Take your time and read Yaz's analysis about mating bonds and Gwynriel so you'll not get disappointed. Plus, when Gwynriel's book is finally out the focus will be on Nesta too, Nessian specifically. Fetsand's time was up. Either you have to love Nessian or you could "roll your eyes" while reading acotar 6

I do not know who that is but I’m not reading anything that’s not the books and the author. That’s it, everyone else has limited information just like I do

Bonus chapters are just BONUS and shouldn’t be the start of a relationship. Elriel didn’t just have moments in the bonus, we don’t even need that bonus, it’s more of a confirmation they’ve been building since acomaf-acosf. You need things in the main series that is accessible to everyone not a limited bonus chapter that don’t even have any development.

I must care about gwyn more than you do because why would you want gwyn with a man that doesn’t consider her a friend, gifts her a necklace he bought and designed for another woman (mind you, he told clotho to give it to anyone first) and two pages before he saw her (mind you he said he thought he would be alone and would’ve ran if she didn’t already see him) he was about to kiss another woman and thinking of having sex with elain.. why do y’all want that for her?

The only thing that allows your ship to even be a thought is Rhys interrupting Azriel when he was about to kiss elain (definitely not elains mating bond which Sarah hasn’t made any development for since book 2) if Rhys didn’t interrupt…Az would be laying somewhere with elain, which isn’t enough for a new relationship and gwyn deserves better than a coincidence or a hurt man

Maybe if you listen to the author instead, you would know that Sarah said that feysand are the center of everything, so I’m not worried 😘 I do adore cassian though not that thing he’s chained to

#pro elain #feysand #acotar #kayla ask #acosf bonus chapters #acosf #a court of thorns and roses #acomaf #acowar #feyre #elriel #Azriel #elain #kayla answers #acotar 5

[theshadowsingersraven]

Debunking the "Lightsinger/Controlling/Luring" Language from the BC

"But when he returned from the cabin in the mountains, he didn't go to market square." "Instead, he found himself at the library beneath the House of Wind, standing before Clotho as the clock chimed seven in the evening." ... "For whatever reason...he could see it."

While it's possible she may have some type of magic (most High Fae do, for which she is 3/4) based on how Nesta's magic reacted to her energy, that doesn't mean she is a lightsinger. Because SJM actually uses those phrases a lot throughout the series, for a variety of reasons.

If it was supposed to be apparent that Gwyn (unintentionally or otherwise) luring Azriel, why would SJM use the exact same language for things not even remotely manipulative or nefarious?

In fact, let's take a tally of those instances, shall we? I keyword-searched through all five books, and here's what I discovered.

"For whatever reason/for whatever strange reason":

ACOTAR-

"He shook his head. “Fortunately or unfortunately, they were all killed by the High Lord of an enemy court. I was spared for whatever reason or Cauldron-granted luck."

ACOMAF-

It had been marked and flagged and pinned,for whatever reasons I couldn’t tell, but my gaze drifted to the windows throughout the room... I didn’t want to think about his family, murdered by a rival court for whatever reason no one had ever explained to me.

I’d bet that they wouldn’t have handed over that book. For whatever reasons of their own, they wanted it. There were seven arrows in total: three in this wing, four in the other. They’d removed the ones from his legs, for whatever reason—the wounds already half-clotted.

ACOWAR-

The priestess who had let them in … for whatever reason, Hybern had left her alive. For whatever reason, he hadn’t chosen to wear the Illyrian leathers. Or the wings. “Four bones … for whatever reason the charlatans came up with that I can’t be bothered to remember.” I’d kill her for this, for betraying us for whatever reason—

ACOFAS-

The town house was still silent as we descended the stairs, my mate opting for Illyrian leathers—for whatever strange reason.

ACOSF-

Which meant they’d approved her presence, for whatever reason. Amren, for whatever reason, rarely stayed here long enough to see this room, so no chair had ever been held for her. For whatever reason, Nesta wanted to crow about her friend to anyone who’d listen.

"found myself/himself/herself/themself"

ACOTAR-

But the shining things had vanished, along with their sniffing and giggling, and I found myself facing a weathered statue of two merry, bounding lambs. Over the next three days, I found myself joining Lucien on Andras’s old patrol while Tamlin hunted the grounds for the Bogge, unseen by us. I found myself overlooking a rose garden, filled with dozens of hues of crimson and pink and white and yellow. After soaking in the bath for nearly an hour, I found myself sitting in a low-backed chair before my room’s roaring fireplace, savoring the feel of Alis brushing out my damp hair. As the afternoon shifted into dusk, I found myself again at the main crossroads of the house. I stumbled, blinking, and found myself standing at the edge of the ring of dancing. He smiled at me, and I found myself smiling back. Perhaps buried it a bit, but she was generous, loving, and kind—a woman I found myself proud to know, to call sister. I didn’t have time for tears of relief as I found myself in another passageway, and I launched farther into the labyrinth. I’d awoken from a fitful sleep and found myself burning hot. I carefully, slowly took a narrow set of stairs upward, up and up, until, to my shock, a trickle of sunlight poured into the stairwell and I found myself on a small balcony jutting out of the side of the mountain.

ACOMAF-

“I didn’t see you Under the Mountain,” I found myself saying, hating those last three words more than anything. But I found myself saying, “I’m sorry about the temple—and the priestesses.” Squinting at the brightness, I found myself standing in what was unmistakably a foyer of someone’s house. “She abandoned you?” I found myself saying. I found myself blinking back the blinding sun, arm still out, Rhysand still before me. After dinner, I wandered into the streets, and found myself eventually standing at the edge of the Rainbow, the night in full swing, patrons and artists and everyday citizens bustling from shop to shop, peering in the galleries, buying supplies. I was still in my dress—which felt vulgar in the light of Velaris—but found myself heading into the garden, as if the moonlight and chill might cleanse my mind. He went back to his pie, swallowing a bite before continuing. “And yet I found myself deciding that if you took his hand, I would find a way to live with it. It would be your choice.”

ACOWAR-

But as we dined, beats of silence going on longer than conversation, I found myself checking them over and over. Flint struck, and I found myself gazing at a makeshift camp of sorts “See if I’ve accepted my lot and found myself grateful for becoming one of them?” Which was why I found myself standing in the foyer the next morning, watching Lucien shoulder his heavy pack. "So I was reborn, and found myself surrounded by my old enemies—faces I had once marked to kill. I found myself on the wrong side of a wall, with the human realm poised to shatter beneath it.” It took all day, but by the end of it, I found myself in the wrecked foyer, Rhys and the others beside me, the chandelier a broken mass behind us on the cracked marble floor.

ACOFAS-

My knees buckled, and I found myself beyond words. Beyond anything but him. Just as I found myself somehow leaning against the wall near the doorway, as if he’d winnowed us.

ACOSF-

She often found herself wishing the Cauldron had ripped those memories away just as it had her humanity, but his face sometimes sullied her dreams. She scrambled to regain any sense of control, of sanity—found herself wanting to hand it all over to him, to let him touch and touch and touch her, lick and suckle and fill her— Nesta found herself asking, “What’s the Dread Trove?” Cassian wanted to have a word with Rhys about the Illyrian legions, so Nesta found herself walking to the front entry of the river house alone. Without doing extra training between the stacks, Nesta found herself less exhausted when she left the library. So she found herself in the doorway of the dining room. “You’re going up to Windhaven?” Nesta found herself asking Cassian as Gwyn bade them farewell at the end of their lesson. She debated ignoring it, but found herself opening a small door through the steel, spiked barrier she kept around herself day and night. So they trained, and between their exercises they talked about books, and Nesta woke on the fourth morning and found herself … excited to see them again. She found herself answering Azriel with a slight smile of her own. Found herself free-falling into his darkened eyes, his beautiful face. Cassian’s attention slid elsewhere, but with each curl upward, Nestafound herself reining in the urge to gaze his way. She told herself to focus on the count, on timing each breath and keeping a tally of how many she’d taken, and yet she found herself thinking of the couch cushions, her cooling tea, her still-damp hair— Didn’t feel anything but that molten rage as the stairs suddenly stopped and she found herself before a door. Nesta heaved a breath, shoving upward, and found herself free to move as she wished. So full of life and motion that she always found herself wishing she had another hour or two of lessons just to hear it again and again and again. She didn’t know why she found herself on the verge of tears as the cinders smoldered. Two hours later, Nesta found herself fully clothed in a bathtub in the middle of the private library, the entire thing filled with bubbles. Only, she found herself looking up. He was so exquisite that if Nesta hadn’t already been panting from the climb, she’d have found herself unable to breathe. She found herself asking, “Does it undermine my image as a warrior to be with you?” Nesta far preferred caves to trees. But as night fell and no caves revealed themselves, she found herself with no other option but to scale one behind Emerie and Gwyn, the latter revealing how she’d managed to rest while up one: a long stretch of rope. Yes, he almost said. But found himself hesitating. Lucien cringed, and Cassian, while inclined to smirk at the thought of the asshole suffering, found himself frowning. When Nesta remained by the doorway, Cassian found himself saying, “I’ll make a bargain with you.” Cassian found himself tensing as Helion stepped into the room, and Nesta rose. Nesta angled her head as Cassian found himself near-breathless, waiting for her reply. A pinprick of it, courtesy of Truth-Teller, had done the job, and Cassian had found himself tensing at the sight of that little bead of red. They both groaned this time, and he found himself saying, “Please.” Nesta let out a sound somewhere between a moan and a scream, and he found himself echoing it as all her silken, blazing heat gripped him.

That's a lot of instances of using those phrases, isn't it? Moreover, the only instance of something nefarious being related to "for whatever reason" was when Amren "betrayed" the Inner Circle during ACOWAR. And then that was resolved by her freeing herself and becoming her true form to help in the war.

In every other instance, "for whatever reason" just meant...something unknown. That's literally it. Which, if someone is developing a potential fondness for someone, platonic or otherwise, without being aware of it, it kind of makes sense that phrase would be used.

And with "found myself/herself/himself", there was not an instance it being used in circumstances of manipulation, where someone was not fully in control of their own body, or by magical effects.

Not even when Cassian was under the control of the Crown. Instead, we have instances of him and Nesta "finding themselves" saying, feeling, or reacting to sex, of all things. Instead, we have instances of several characters doing things without really thinking, feeling things, wandering, or reacting to circumstances happening around them.

Now, I know Azriel tends to do things with purpose, but I don't think he's immune to spacing out, doing things without thinking, feeling things, wandering, or reacting to circumstances happening around them.

#anti e/riel #antielriel #pro gwynriel #pro gwyneth berdara #i'm tired y'all #long post