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kwritingbooks · 2 years

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co-written by me & @shroombloomm

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While psychedelics aren’t anything new to people like Aurora and Nina, it’s a whole new world for Harry. The world is constantly shifting around them, causing light to shine on things that was once hidden in the dark. How things can change with just one small tab…

AU: star-being!harry x astronomy-student!aurora

Content warning: substance use (acid, alcohol, and weed)

AURORA’S POV

I wasn't sure how long it had been since we first placed the tablets of acid on our tongues. All I knew was that at some point our regular conversations turned into fits of laughter that caused our cheeks to hurt. It was as if there was no off button and all we could do was let it take control over our bodies– clutching against our stomachs from the pain of happiness.

My guess was that it had been at least an hour since, considering that I could feel my high climbing. Both Harry and I's backs were laid out on the bed of the truck, still unmoved from the spot we had initially been in. I could hear the faint chatters below us, assuming that at some point Ryan and Nina had crawled out of the truck bed and laid on the ground below us. I think I preferred it that way. It gave the familiarity of her voice nearby but with the closeness of Harry to my left. That on top of the vastness above enveloping us together in one was just about as perfect as it could get.

Looking up at the night sky was always something that I found great comfort in. The way I could see the flicks of light flash faintly in the far distance, while others shined as bright as they did every other night before. But, those were my thoughts even when I was sober.

All of my appreciations and perspectives changed with hallucinogens clouding my reality. What was already so beautiful heightened to lengths that I didn't know were possible. Each time felt like a whole new experience, no matter if I was doing the same thing regardless. Under this new perspective, the stars danced in all their forms. They waltzed, they tangoed, they did ballet. They lived just as we did.

Each dance reflected against everything above, including the clouds and the moon. The individual stars were there with their own performances in order to entertain the moon, I figured. Yet, I felt like the only audience member that was taken aback by the show above me. The moon and I gazed together to encapsulate everything going on. It felt like a hug from far away, as if they outstretched their beams of light around my body into the warmest of hugs.

It was beautiful, to say the least. My lips had grown that familiar tug of fatigue from the smile that had drawn so tightly on my face. It was the only thing I knew how to do at that moment. It was the only thing I wanted to do. Needed to do.

I crooked my head to Harry's side, curious how he was doing. I knew I felt great, but I also knew what to expect from it as well. Harry, on the other hand, had no idea. This was his first time after all. I couldn't imagine what he was feeling considering he only ever started experiencing life on Earth fairly recently on top of now experiencing in this new way.

"You okay?" I breathed out softly, peering at him.

He had a hand rested neatly on top of his chest and I watched closely as it rose and fell with his breaths. They looked slightly uneven, possibly a little quicker than his usual pace.

He nodded his head with a small smile, matching our eyes together. "I don't know what exactly is happening, but I think it's nice. It feels nice. Even my clothes feel nice."

I couldn't help but giggle as my eyes ventured towards his other hand that was trailing along the fabric of his shirt. It looked smooth as he rubbed it between two of his fingers and eventually retracted it back to meet his other hand on his chest.

A hardly noticeable layer of sweat had grown on his forehead since the last time I had looked over. If it wasn't for his calm demeanor with his tone, I would have thought he was anxious about what was going on. His tongue would periodically lick over his lips as he looked above him. He seemed just as awestruck by the beauty beaming down on us as I was.

He quickly turned back towards me, now with a slightly concerned look on his face. "Aurora?"

"Yes, Harry?" I almost blushed as his name came out of my mouth so seamlessly. It was like it tickled against my lips as it escaped them, leaving butterflies to flutter out with it.

"Is this the weed, alcohol, or acid?" He drummed his fingers against his chest, darting his eyes around us. He moved them slowly around, like he was trying to take in all of the scenery closely– from the metal of the truck to the blanket underneath us to the water bottle that had been knocked over in the corner. He wanted to see and experience it all.

I chuckled. "It's all of it. Everything, it's all one." I hummed a satisfied breath as I switched my head back above, closing my eyes briefly. I could hear faint gusts of wind brushing along the trees along with Harry's breath beside me. It was as if it was his breaths causing the leaves to brush against one another from so far away.

"But mostly the acid." I joked, concealing a small laugh inside.

"Interesting." Harry responded matter-of-factly. "Does it get stronger than this? I feel like I'm climbing almost. Like my brain."

This giggle was much harder to conceal. "This is just the beginning, Harry. But, it'll be fun, I promise. Just sit back and enjoy the feelings right now. You'll know when you're there." My eyes remained shut, listening in on all the noises around. Harry had grown silent again, but his lack of questioning was usually a good sign. He was enjoying it just the same.

"What do you mean nothing matters? Anything can matter if you want it to. That's the whole point!" I heard Nina ramble below. I could tell by the way she was talking she was waving her hands around like she normally did when she went on her philosophical talks. I smiled to myself as I pictured the image in my head. She always had a way to bring up these things, especially when drugs or alcohol were introduced to the table.

"We're all just a little speck of dust in the grand scheme of things. If we were to just evaporate into dust, it wouldn't change anything about the universe." Ryan rebutted. I heard Nina let out an exasperated laugh as he continued. "Hell, if this one universe evaporated, then what? Exactly! There's so many that it would hardly change anything."

I didn't have to see her face to know there was an eye-roll after that sentence. I was enjoying eavesdropping in on their conversation, playing it like a movie in front of me. I even pictured the stars having the conversation, morphing into Ryan and Nina's faces instead. Instead of the previous dances, they were bickering back and forth about the meaning of life.

It was my show after all. I got to control it.

"You're such a nihilist. It's okay to find meaning in your own life. It's okay just to find bits of happiness in anything we want to. It doesn't have to have a big meaning behind it." Nina retorted.

The star that I envisioned her as was directly in front of me, burning bright in the middle of other fainter stars. Her words caused her brightness to only increase as I sunk deeper in the truck bed, watching.

What she was saying was something that I agreed with, but I didn't put much thought into it before. Whenever she would try to pull me into one of her life talks, I would usually tell her that I just wanted to enjoy my high and not have an existential crisis. But, there didn't have to be a crisis if I didn't want there to be one. That was one thing I never considered.

I morphed my life how I wanted based on the choices I made and found meaning in. Every little "yes" I said or "no" I said to things led me exactly to the spot that I was in right now. If I didn't choose to listen to my parents about their interest in astronomy, I wouldn't have continued this path. Maybe I wouldn't have gone to this school at all– never to have met people like Nina or Harry once in my life.

Maybe I would have majored in marketing. Or business. Or something else that would have piqued my non-astronomical-interested brain at the time.

That was semi-hard to imagine. Besides the fact that this had consumed so much of my life, it was hard to imagine that I could have lived a life so different. A few months ago, never would I have thought that I would be tripping acid with Harry– let alone the fact that he was a being that lived among the stars.

Coming to terms with that felt like a trip all in itself.

But, it wasn't. This was my reality because I made it my reality. I found solaceness in the little things that led me here. In this truck bed.

"It would go noticed if your universe evaporated, by the way." Harry whispered in my direction.

It almost shocked me, forgetting that I was lying beside him. I was so enwrapped with the conversation going on beneath us, that it felt like I was the only one who existed in this reality for a moment.

I turned to look at him as he laid unchanged in his positioning, continually drumming his fingertips over his hand. His one sentence made me feel the most comforted I had felt all night. There was no arguing with a being that knew all the secrets about the stars and the universe it surrounded. He knew it all, and I believed him.

"I think I'm starting to feel it, Aurora. Things are moving." He scrunched his eyebrows, squinting at the night sky above. He seemed to be over the existential debate, now focusing on himself now. "At least I don't think that's normal. I don't remember them moving before. Is that supposed to happen?" His voice was still a whisper, growing quieter the more he spoke. I couldn't hold back another fit of giggles as I watched him so focused.

"That's a part of it. Everything will feel stronger– your emotions, your sensations, things around you. Let your body and mind speak for you." I reminded him.

"My mind is telling me that I'm floating. Almost like I'm back home. It's nice. I wish I could take you to show you." He whispered a little louder this time. It was hard to fight against the small stab of disappointment I felt when he said it. It reminded me that I could only live out his experiences through the stories he told— never to experience it myself.

His hands patted beside him like he was double-checking to make sure he wasn't actually floating. A satisfied hum left his lips once he realized he was still where he last put himself.

"Also I feel all my clothes on me." He said it with a confused spark with his words. "I know I'm wearing them, but they feel funny. Softer, maybe. Smooth? Or is it scratchy?" He battled with himself as he attempted to word how he was feeling. I had yet to say anything, completely enjoying watching him talk himself through what he was going through.

"But it feels good, right?" I smiled at him. His hands were smoothing along his body, lightly tugging at it as he experienced the different sensations.

He nodded his head. "I think so."

"Good. It's okay to feel things. Feel as much as you want, it's your reality—your choice. You shape how you feel, especially tonight. It's all up to you how you want it to go." The words rolled off my tongue as I said them, reassuring myself in the process.

My choice. Always.

But especially tonight.

"Really?" He sounded so innocent as he asked, causing my cheeks to burn.

For some reason, I almost wanted to cry. Not out of sadness, though. Happiness. It flowed through me so powerfully and it was hard to contain it. I felt so at peace in these moments I currently shared with him. All I wanted to do was sit there forever.

"Really." I repeated with a slight blur of tears rimming along my eyes. I blinked them away, spinning my head around.

"We'll be back!" Nina rushed out, causing me to sit up quickly from my spot. She had Ryan's hand in hers, giggling among themselves as she pulled him away.

I watched as they disappeared into the field. I rolled my eyes at them, sinking back down into the bedding that cushioned from under us. I let out a soft breath, focusing back onto the stars.

The music from the truck lulled from behind us, but it was so much quieter than it was when Nina had first turned it on. Guitars sounded through the speakers, making the truck vibrate from under us.

"What is the meaning to life?" I whispered from under my breath, glancing towards Harry out of the corner of my eye before rolling my head to look at him. Harry's eyes widened just slightly, a smile curved onto his lips as he let out a soft chuckle.

"Heavy question, Aurora." He whispered back, shifting his hips slightly as his fingertips ran up and down his torso slowly. "I can't say that I know."

"You are, y'know...other-wordly, so I just thought–"

"Star-being." He stopped me, rolling his head to gaze towards me. "I am a star-being, but even I ask myself these questions. You may think that we hold answers to those kinds of questions, but in reality, we are just as lost as humans. In our own ways."

He paused for a moment, licking over his lips as he furrowed his brows carefully. His features became more bright, more clear when I looked at him. Like, really looked at him. I may have stolen a glance or two from him before, but really looking at him now, it was intense.

"Why are we made so differently?" Harry whispered lowly as he searched my face for any answers. "What is the difference between me and you? Really. We just live on other planets, and other than that, we feel things the same way it seems."

"People don't see you the way I see you." I whispered back to him as I rolled onto my side, blinking hard. "They don't see the Harry that I do."

Harry parted his lips, brows pinched as he gazed at my features. There was a silence between the both of us, for what felt like eternity. In reality, it was only mere moments, but with Harry everything felt like an eternity. Maybe time had stopped, just for us, so we could live in this moment longer together.

His features started to blur together, but not in a way that made him unrecognizable. It was almost as if he had stars that personally kissed alongside his cheekbones. Looking at him was like looking at someone I had known for so long. He felt so familiar to me, and it made my chest shift in a way that was like butterflies rattling in a cage.

And maybe it was that I had known him for as long as it felt. Maybe each time I sat underneath the stars, I was with him and didn't know it. Each time I felt drawn to a specific sparkle above, it was him looking down at me, watching me grow up. Maybe he didn't even know it himself either.

His brown curls that fell into his face looked like someone had taken a colored pencil and sketched them themselves. I looked down to my fingers, wiggling them to make sure that I was still here. That I was really, actually here.

For a moment, it didn't feel like I was. It felt like I was somehow making this up in my mind, and it was playing out in front of me. I waved my hand lazily, watching the tracers of it blur in front of me.

"I'm really high." I swallowed thickly as I rolled onto my back. I ran a hand through my hair, trying to steady my breathing. Behind my eyelids, it wasn't any better than what I was seeing when I opened them.

There were lines of reds, blues, and purples that exploded into the air. Patterns floated around the back of my eyelids, as if I had paid for my own personal psychedelic show. I let out a shallow breath as I went to place a hand onto my heart, but was caught off guard by someone else's touch.

I opened my eyes carefully, looking above me as I saw Harry's hand interlocked with mine, lacing them together. I blinked hard, watching it morph into one colorful abstract blobs. I fixated my eyes towards him with a slight frown on my lips.

"It's okay, Aurora." He whispered softly as his thumb traced over the top of my hand. "Come with me, yeah?"

Harry sat up from the pillows, his hand still interlocked with mine as he crouched on his feet. I blinked slowly, sitting up to meet his height.

"Where are we going?" I breathed out. When I looked out to the field, it was a little intimidating. The stars lit up the field all the way to the treeline of the woods. The trees danced with each other as the wind gusted against our skin to cool us down.

"We–" He said as he jumped down to the grass, a small smile on his lips. "Are going to create our own reality."

I gazed at him in awe. His smile was brighter than usual, thanks to the acid, but it was gorgeous. If it was any brighter, it may have blinded me. Even in the dead of Fall, he made my skin feel like it was Spring, surrounded by bursts of colors and refreshing air. His laughter that sung deep within him could raise lilacs and daisies from the driest of gardens.

He was a magnet, something I couldn't stay away from. A warm feeling flushed through my body as I felt my heart pull me towards him.

I crawled towards the end of the truck bed, taking his hand into mine as I jumped down. My feet hit the grass, and I let out a slow breath. I knew I was okay, but it was the high that was getting to me.

Maybe I was a little too high after all.

I looked down at the grass, watching the flecks of blades melt from under me. The wind that brushed my skin felt like a gentle hug, and when my blood-shot eyes flicked towards Harry, he stood close to my side. His presence warmed my insides, and my heart knocked against the bones of the cavity that homed it.

"Are you coming with me, Aurora?" His voice rang into my ear as he held our hands up together. I blinked hard, taking a step towards him as my grip tightened around his hand and nodded with a weak smile.

The euphoria I felt when he took off into the field nearly drowned me into a pool of happiness. Our hands interlocked with one another as we ran through the field, my mind that was once too overwhelmed with feeling, now became filled with the purest cocktail of dopamine and serotonin.

I watched the grass as my feet pranced through, and with each step, my feet melted into the dirt. My body felt like it was bouncing on a trampoline, reminding me of when I was a kid and my mom had bought me a small one to put out in the backyard for the summertimes.

Tops of the trees looked like they were breathing with each inhale I took. I let out a childish laugh as I gazed towards the stars that spread across the sky. The light kissed my skin and made me feel like I was glowing. I was my own star-being. I was being brought back to a time where nothing mattered, and they hugged me close to tell me all their secrets of the galaxy.

It brought tears that brimmed my eyeline as I slowed my running down. I let go of Harry's hand, bringing myself to my knees, placing my hands onto the ground. I couldn't help but laugh. It was all so unbelievable.

Being so out in the open in nature like this was like a library, I was eager to learn about everything it had to offer. The trees sang to me as the wind blew through them, immersing me into the most ancient melody they have ever sung.

It felt as though I was knowing of everything about what it had to offer–with my entire being. I peeled away my ego, exposing my soul to the rocks and trees. In this moment, I felt my heart fall out of the cavity of my chest and dig itself deep into the roots of the Earth.

The leaves crunched from under my hands, looking up at Harry who was just a few feet away from me. His breathing was fast, placing his hands onto his hips as his chest rose up and down.

"Aurora, what're you–"

Before he could say anything else, I grabbed a handful of leaves and threw them at him. He flinched, a gasp coming from him before he laughed out. He furrowed his brows, bending down to grab some leaves before running towards me.

"No!" I laughed out, tears streaming down my face as I quickly stood upright. My feet carried me as I ran from him, but I heard him coming up on me close. The downfall of being shorter than he was was that he had longer legs to run faster.

My belly hurt from laughing, and I was nearly breathless. I almost forgot where I was, and it felt so freeing. Before I knew it, I had landed into a pile of leaves. I fell with a thud, but it still didn't stop me from laughing.

Harry came from behind me, a high pitched laugh escaping his lips as he dropped the leaves. He put his hands onto his knees, bending over as giggles spilled from his lips continuously. The leaves crunched from under me, my hands feeling the roughness of them as I let out a soft sigh.

My body sank into the pile as if it was a sinkhole that was inviting me to suffocate in it, and I grabbed ahold of Harry's arm to come down with me. The grass underneath only pulled us down deeper in order to feel the comfort of Earth enwrap us together as one.

I opened my eyes to see him already gazing at me, the moon lighting up one side of his face. His eyes sparkled, twisting the faint colors of his irises that were noticeable in the minimal lighting the moon provided.

We shared laughter, echoing back and forth as it bounced around. The chuckles ricocheted off of each other's skin, tickling us as we buried deeper into the piles of fallen leaves.

My laugh got cut short as his hand shot up to my face, skirting around faintly. It took me off guard, as he looked closely at whatever he was brushing off of my cheek. His touch lingered heavily, sending small sparks of electricity through the atoms underneath my skin. His fingers felt like puddy, melting into me as he grazed them over so quickly.

"Your hair was in the way." He whispered softly, almost causing me to forget that we were just bent over laughing moments ago. "I like to see your face."

His wording caused the corners of my mouth to curl, partially from the awkwardness of the sentence, but mostly from knowing what he meant by it.

"I like to see your face, too." I replied back to him softly. I brushed my own hand in front of him, tucking a lock of hair behind his ear that had also fallen from its usual placement.

The twists and turns of his curls sent a rumbling feeling in my chest. I almost wanted to dive into them, swimming along the ridges as if they were the mightiest waves of the sea. I wanted to drown in them, get lost in that sea of his.

Without thinking twice, I inched my body closer to his. His eyes widened momentarily, but readjusted as he found comfort in the new proximity. Shockingly, there was no awkwardness in the silence that lingered between the two of us as we gazed into one another's eyes. I looked carefully at him as he reciprocated.

I wondered if he was surveying me in the way that I was to him. I wanted to understand him. I wanted to see what his eyes saw, feel what he felt, and hear what he heard.

A small leaf danced in the wind atop his head as my eyes continued to wander along his face and I smiled, plucking it away. I watched behind him as the leaf flew away in its own dance of freedom.

Freedom was all we ever needed in life and it could mean whatever we wanted it to. Tonight I didn't have to second guess every action I took, every action I chose, every breath I breathed. All I had to do was live in the moment and take it as it came.

I found my own freedom in that.

Just do whatever I felt I was supposed to.

Before I knew it, the space between us became nonexistent. His hands wrapped around my back as mine did the same to him, pulling us so close that we were glued together. All I could think about was the way his hands gripped against my back and the way his breaths hit against my lips.

I had never been so close to him before, yet it felt like I wasn't close enough.

My mouth collided with his softly, the breaths from his nose tickling against my skin as our lips moved together. His lips were soft like the skin of a peach, his fingers digging into my back as his breathing quickened.

I couldn't believe we were kissing. It felt so right—none of it wrong. All the silent tension between us had finally been broken, and within that, I felt a weight fall off my shoulders.

My fingers got lost into his hair as I pressed our bodies together, one of my legs swinging over to lock around his hip. My lips parted right as his did, my tongue poking out to slowly trace around his bottom lip. I felt his body shiver against me, a low moan escaping from his throat.

His touch set me on fire, my body screaming on the inside for me to do something. More. More. More. My brain was skewed. I had wanted this for so long, and I hadn't even realized it until now.

His tongue met mine, delicately, rubbing the tip against it. My body temperature rose as our tongues pushed against each other's. His large hand pressed harder against my back, causing my shirt to raise. The more contact I could get of our skin together was all I craved, especially as his fingers danced underneath my shirt. He placed them at the low of my back so he could feel me as if he could read my mind.

We were both breathless with the kiss, messily kissing one another until it turned into feverish making out. I fluttered my eyes open for a mere moment, just to look at the pleasure that spread across his face, but instead was met with something even better.

It was very gentle and vague, but it was there. The outline of his body glowed a beautiful purple color. I blinked hard, making sure that it wasn't the acid that was playing tricks on me, but it was Harry that was glowing.

"Are you okay?" I whispered softly against his lips as my fingers gently rubbed through the scalp of his hair. He breathed out unsteadily, his fingers shaking against my skin as he fluttered his eyes open to look up at me.

"More than okay." He whispered back to me, gulping thickly. "It feels really good to kiss you, Aurora."

I nodded my head slowly, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. I adjusted my hips against his, and in doing so, had felt his cock that pressed hard against his pants. It was apparent, but something that I hadn't noticed when we were sharing a kiss. I looked down between us so I could get a good look at it, a smirk curved on my lips.

"I'm sorry, it's never done anything like this before." Harry whispered out, his cheeks red hot with embarrassment. "I can't seem to control it."

For a moment, I couldn't believe I had just given one of my friends a boner, but then again, I couldn't believe that we were all over each other. And to think, I was the one to give him that bliss of small excitement, one that apparently was his first. Even if it was just his first on Earth, I didn't care. It was hot.

"It's okay. I like it." I whispered to him, placing two fingers under his jaw as I made him look at me. I pressed my lips to him once more, starting to delve my tongue across his bottom lip. He let out a low moan, his tongue meeting mine to rub against.

I adjusted my hips once more to meet his hardened cock, and surely got a reaction out of him when I brushed against it. His tongue went still, his nails digging into my skin as he tried to steady his breathing once more.

I pressed my forehead against his, letting out a shaky breath as my core started to throb. He wasn't the only one that was excited. I could feel myself start to ache in pleasure. And almost as if on cue, Harry bucked his hips forward, just once, and that was it for me.

I placed a hand onto his cheek, pulling our hips together as I rocked mine against his. I knew he needed the relief, and I couldn't imagine the drastic difference in sensation that he was feeling. Harry breathed out into my mouth, his hand quickly going to my hips as he felt my core grind against his throbbing cock.

"Aurora–" He gasped out as his eyes fluttered to the back of his head, pressing his forehead against my cheek. I could hear his breathing start to pick up even quicker, his fingernails were digging so deep into my skin that I thought he was going to break the surface.

"It feels good?" I whispered into his ear, breathlessly, a moan following after it. Harry pressed an open mouth kiss to my jaw, his tongue darting out to lap up my skin carefully. I could feel my arousal spread around in my panties.

"Feels really–fuckin' good." Harry growled against my skin. His hand left my hip as it grabbed the back of my neck and clashed our lips together once more. This time he had control, something that I had never seen of him. This was most certainly a side that I never thought I would have ever seen.

I liked it. Really fucking liked it.

His hand went to the back of my ass, having a tight grip on it as his hips started to roll harshly against mine. He moaned into my mouth, sending shivers down my spine. I felt like I was on cloud-fucking-nine. If we didn't stop now, I was going to take it further–something I wasn't sure if Harry was ready for.

Placing a hand onto his chest, I slowed down the kissing until we came to a full stop. I knew myself. I knew that I would crush under pressure and potentially go further. It was Harry, someone that sparked a fire inside of me, and if anything he had a sense of irresistibility to me. I wasn't sure why, but he just did.

"I'm sorry—" He swallowed thickly, his hips coming to a full stop. I looked down between us, seeing that there was a small wet spot on his zipper. I chuckled. He was wet because of me. It was a proud moment.

I was fortunate he couldn't see the similar fate between my own legs, too.

"Don't be sorry." I said breathlessly, running my hand over his cheek slowly. He stared into my eyes with awe, a glint of adoration. I was looking at him just the same.

"I just—" He pulled from my body, leaving a cold feeling as he rolled onto his back, his eyes fluttering closed. "Give me a second to calm down."

I could have done a lot of things to take care of his problem. It was all in the open for me. I was sure, if prompted, he would have let me, but it seemed that he felt embarrassed for feeling something so strongly. Something that he may have never felt before.

"Have you ever..." I rolled over towards him, gesturing towards his boner that seemed to be calming down. "Had...sex?"

He swallowed thickly, a silence following after my invasive question. His eyes opened slowly, staring up into the sky as he placed his hands onto his chest.

"Back home, yes." He said honestly.

"Is it different?" I scooted myself towards him, placing a hand onto his. I was curious. Was the sensation different? Did they do it differently than humans?

"It's more soul binding than it is pleasurable, but I suppose that you could say that it's different—sensation wise." He glanced towards me out of the corner of his eye. "I'm not blind to the logic of how humans make love to one another, but it is very different on my planet. We can of...blend into one being, if that makes sense."

Soul binding? Blending together? It sounded interesting—almost devastatingly beautiful in a way.

"Oh, okay." I whispered out, nodding towards him. A sudden gust of wind rushed past us, now realizing how chilly it had gotten. How long had we been out here for? It felt like ages, but it couldn't have been more than an hour. Although, my drug-induced mind was never a good timekeeper anyway.

I shivered, rubbing my arms slowly. Harry looked towards me with a frown, noticing how cold I had suddenly become.

"Here." He said softly as he leaned up, pulling the jacket he had off his body before wrapping it around my back. He fixed the arms so it would cover the front of me as well.

"You didn't have to—" I tried to object, but he shook his head, putting a hand up to me.

"Being cold reminds me of home." He said softly as he sank back into the pile of leaves. "It is mostly cold where I am from, so the temperature doesn't bother me all that bad. I actually quite like it."

I hummed again softly, almost envisioning myself on his home planet. I had no idea what it could have possibly looked like, but it was fun to imagine myself walking around on my own drawn-out idea. In my mind, everyone floated in their star-being form. I figured they all resembled what Harry looked like when he showed me his true self, too. They were all beautiful as they brushed past one another. Maybe it was like one big campsite on a moon-like surface. Maybe they could even touch the nearby stars if they wanted to. Its cold touch only tickling against their own fingertips, completely unaffected by the human reality to their environment.

"Should we head back?" I broke in, shifting my attention in his direction.

He blinked at me for a second, as if he was first observing my facial features before he could process the words that came out of my mouth along with it. I partially wondered if he was still seeing the things that I was currently seeing, his face mildly shifting in the darkness. Shockingly, it didn't freak me out at all. Somehow it only seemed to highlight the beauty that was permanently etched into him.

He nodded his head. "Sure, let's go. Although, I'm not quite sure how to get back." A slight twinge of worry twirled in his already-twirling face, but I couldn't help but smile.

"It's okay. I'll get us back. C'mon." I quickly shot myself up, extending a hand down towards him.

It was slightly funny how quickly the air around us had shifted. I had almost forgotten that only moments ago we had the most intimate moment we had ever shared together. That was much more than just a simple hug. It made my stomach jolt lightly as I considered it.

It was just the drugs though, right?

Harry placed his hand into mine, shooting himself up just as quick. It sparked a newfound energy in me and I ran towards the car, giggling as I did so. I didn't look back as I heard him laugh to himself as well. I could imagine the dimples embedded into his cheeks as he grinned behind me, running to catch up.

"Hey! Wait up!" He giggled out breathlessly.

"You were given those long legs for a reason, Starboy!" I yelled over my shoulder.

I could see Ryan's truck coming up, reflecting against the moonlight that shone so brightly above. For some reason, it felt like a rush of warmth seeing it. It was like coming home after a long vacation, ready to sleep in your own bed or breathe your own air. I almost wanted to run up to it and hug it.

My arms pushed against the truck as I used it to stop myself from running into it. I turned behind me to see where Harry was, but he was much closer than I thought as he almost instantaneously met me at my other side.

"You like to run when you're on substances it seems." Harry huffed out in between heavy breaths.

"Running's fun." I smiled, breathing out just as quickly.

He snorted lightly, hanging his head between his shoulders as his arms leaned against the truck. I watched him as his body rose and fell from the influx of breaths from our little adventure. The idea that he looked so human, acted so human – but wasn't – was beyond my mind's current comprehension.

His head shot up, his brows furrowing into a frown. His sudden change in demeanor took me off guard and it made my heart feel heavy in my chest.

"Where's Nina and Ryan?"

I spun my head to the left and right of me, squinting my eyes to allow them to adjust to the distance in the dark. While the moon was shining, it didn't provide much guidance past a certain point. Plus the dancing grass due to tripping wasn't much help either.

"You think they fell asleep?" He asked again, walking off to the side as he squinted his eyes as well. "Should we call her?"

I patted my pockets, pulling the phone from my back pocket. I was a little shocked that I hadn't lost it. It was a common occurrence when I was either drunk or high, my phone always was at fault for my poor decision making during those times.

A buzzing from the truck bed sounded out as I heard the rings coming from my phone.

"Shit." I repeated as I slid the phone back in my pocket. "She left her phone here. Of course."

"What do we do?" Harry asked with a shakiness to his voice.

I didn't want to think of worst-case scenarios. I knew Nina and knew that she wouldn't do anything too stupid. She probably had just run out of view. Honestly, they were probably doing what Harry and I had started – except actually finishing it.

"I'm sure they're okay. We can wait in the truck bed for them if you want. She's done this before, she always comes back." I smiled at him in hopes to ease his nerves.

His face appeared to relax as he nodded his head, pulling himself up into the back of the truck. He leaned out one of his hands as I reached for it, pulling me up.

It was silent for a bit as we adjusted into the makeshift bed that was made. Luckily, sober me wasn't there to judge the comfort of it. I would have been lying if I said I wasn't slightly nervous because she didn't have her phone on her, but I also knew Nina. This was definitely like her, and while I didn't like it, she knew how to handle her own. She was probably having the time of her life just like we were.

"I'll stay awake and wait for her if you want to go to sleep." Harry offered behind me under the covers already.

I shook my head, giggling at him. "You sure? That sounds boring."

He shrugged his shoulders. "I don't mind. I just wanna make sure she's okay."

I smiled. I knew sleep wasn't in my near-future forecast, but it had to be approaching eventually. It was hard to resist seeing him all bundled up in the warmth of the covers I brought from home. It was a burnt orange with crochet stitching in the details. My eyes twisted around each knot, losing sight of reality again.

"Aurora?" Harry whispered out in a concerned manner, sitting up from his spot.

My eyes shifted back to him and I instinctively smiled back at him. "I'm good. Yeah, we'll do that."

His expression softened as he lowered himself back down, exposing an opening of the covers for me to join him in. It didn't take any hesitation to venture closer, shimmying my cold body into the warmth of his.

For someone who said he enjoyed the coldness of his home planet, he always seemed to be wrapped with a body temperature that was inviting in the best way. Whether it was in his hugs or when we were wrapped up together, lips clashing into one another's. Feeling his arms wrap tightly around myself only strengthened that feeling that I had initially felt upon running up to the truck.

Home.

Harry felt like home. He was my home.

a/n: long time no see!! i’ve missed u guys and starboy so much. re-reading this chapter was so :’) sunny & i went through a lot of effort with this one so i rly rly hope everyone enjoys it & thank u for sticking around with starboy <3

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caseyogdenart · 1 year

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It has been my final week here on Falmouth University's IFY with my final module, 105, being completed and presented at The Poly in Falmouth (seen in earlier post, image 1 and 2). I would like to mention that I had 8 weeks to work on this and I wouldn't like to dwell on this so first let's talk about my struggles and regrets with my piece. Originally I had planned to make 2 cycles (a run and a crawl) and a pounce animation. It was also my first time animating in a proper computer animation software, whilst also practicing my digital art skills.

First I tried out the software Pencil2D and had about a weeks worth of work done until i ran into some problems with the software, i couldn't reorder frames after I had added them or beforehand for that matter which I couldnt get past and had to move onto another software called OpenToonz.

OpenToonz was too feature rich and overwhelming for my current level so after a short while I stopped using it, but I might choose to revisit it in the future as it contained some exciting features and seems to be useful in translating hand drawn pen and paper animation into something digitally workable.

Finally I landed on Photoshop, a software that I was considering to begin with but chose against originally due to the price tag (which was important as I needed something to work from home on). Also I would be lying if I didn't mention it intimidated me to begin with. However after using it once I actually really enjoyed it, it allowed me to edit pixels which as someone who isn't yet good at shaping things like shadows properly it helped a lot. I also found it so much more fun to use than Pencil2D which I needed after being disappointed for this long. I can't explain how much fun I had making this funny little creature move, it reinvigorated me. Unfortunately at this point it was too late to do more than one cycle as I still had to learn how to use the software and redo all of the work I had scrapped so far, my biggest regret of this module.

Like I had mentioned previously it's kind of hard to state how much i enjoyed just drawing and the gratification of making something move no matter how simple. Making small details in the bobbing of the ears and how good the shadows turned out.

The best thing I learned during the making of this is my faith in being able to make something move! In all seriousness I did learn a lot during this module, not only how to use certain aspects of an important software like photoshop, but also that I really don't like Pencil2D. I also learned how to apply a design to an animated sketch, something I had yet to attempt. How to apply shadows to a digital drawing, how to make an effective 4 frame cycle. And perhaps most important to me is that I gained a lot of confidence with my drawing tablet. As an aside I also wore out my first nib which I didnt know was a thing but in hindsight makes a lot of sense!

I think it's safe rto say I didn't keep very well to my week plan but I feel like in the end it didn't matter to me as I learned a lot, came out the other end with something I was proud of even if there is less than I would've liked and most importantly I had a lot of fun with it when I found a software that was right for me.

In closing, I can't wait to do more animating in the future. I loved my time at the IFY when I was able to attend, the staff are wonderful, my close friends have been so supportive and my other classmates have been a source of endless laughter, silliness (and jealousy, no joke you're all so talented, I wish you all well ❤). I'm excited to see where this road leads me and looking forward to mine and my friends future here at Falmouth Uni.

Completed and Presented 16 May 2023

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daisy-dooodles · 1 year

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About me :D

hi, hello! to start this blog off I think it would be nice to introduce myself a little, so here go a couple of basic questions about me...

What's your name? I go by Daisy in English (cause it's way cuter and easier than my original name in Polish lol and I really like flowers). But let's say my initials are MP, that's why I sign my artwork with it :D

What are your pronouns? She/Her

How old are you? I'm 22 years old, living that early 20s crisis lol

Do you have a degree in art? Nope, I went to uni for Romance Philology, cause I really enjoy languages, literature and different cultures too. But I've always liked art too as a side project!

So why this blog? Well, I don't really know what I want to do in life, so I decided to make this to start taking it more seriously as a possible actual job or just a way of having a place less chaotic than my insta to show the art I'm proud of sort of like a portfolio (and maybe even some behind the scenes I never shared...)

And what would you like to work in? I feel like a creative space would be cool. Maybe like editorial work, maybe designing stuff for books... idk, but I like the idea of being able to work on many different things instead of doing the same for years on end...

Do you do original art or fanart? Both. I have many ideas, sometimes I get obsessed with a show or something and want to try making fanart for it, but I have many original ideas too!

Is it traditional or digital art? Well, I enjoy both immensely. Because I sort of moved to Poland from Spain I don't have many of my supplies, so I'm resorting to digital more. I use the XP-Pen Deco 01 V2 tablet to draw. The program I use is Medibang Paint (and I am thinking of buying Clip Studio in the future when I have more resources at hand, cause I heard it's really good!) Unfortunately, my laptop is not great at colours, so I really like Medibang for letting me upload to the cloud and letting me deal with the colours on my phone :D (none of this is sponsored btw, I'm just sharing my experience)

How would you describe your art style? "I'm just trying" lol. I don't have one, I just try new and different things and supplies and programs as I feel like it. Many times it depends on what feeling I want the piece to have, so that makes me try and learn new techniques and I really enjoy doing that :D

Do you do commissions? Maybe a store? No, I don't. I'm not ready for something like that yet. Maybe down the line uploading stuff to pages like redbubble could be an option, I don't know much about how any of this works, I'll be figuring it out slowly

Can I message you? Please do, for anything! You wanna be mutuals and share with me silly posts or about a fandom we share? Go ahead! Do you need advice or vent to someone? DMs are open :D

What fandoms are you in? Well, I was in Sanders Sides for a long time, but I don't really go there anymore, maybe when we get more content I might just jump back in, though I still follow Thomas and check his content when I can cause I still enjoy it! I do enjoy figure skating and follow a bit on Yuzuru Hanyu, mostly Then we have my most recent fandoms I am kinda obsessed with: MDZS and BTS. Yeah, wild stuff. Have I drawn anything about them? Not yet really, I do have one MDZS sketch I'm working on, and a couple based on BTS songs, so maybe soon I'll share those here cause I feel quite proud of them so far :D I do enjoy many other series and films, but I don't think I'd be able to just list them cause it's so random. You can always ask if you need a friend to whom you get to be weird to, no judgement, we all be like that! I ranted about BTS to my bestie who knows basically nothing about them for almost a year now and they still love me nonetheless hahahah

(...yeah, so let's leave it at that for now, will update when new things pop in my head)

see you around 💜

#artists on tumblr #daisy talks #introduction #i ramble a lot #and use many parentheses #probs won't do that here as i did on insta before #it's just tiring lol #but tags are kinda fun...#we'll see what happens...

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star-shooters · 1 year

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Old Art of Star Shooters

I recently cleaned my DeviantArt, GoldStarProduction, of all of my art since 2013 and found a lot of good art. I haven't gotten around to making new art that I am confident in sharing yet. So, I will post the digital art of some of the characters within Star Shooters.

I constantly altered between a cute simplified design to a more detailed and realistic one. I am still working on what style to draw these characters in, and some characters don't have a design yet. So far, all the art I have is old designs of the characters and do not reflect who they are in the current version of my story.

Apologies for any watermarks shown below. The old tablet that I used to draw with doesn't support the art app I once used.

Left: Gold Gemitaurus and Silver Kentaurus-Sirius | Right: A more recent drawing of Gold Gemitaurus

I originally had the idea that their cores, souls, would float above their heads. Now their cores are inside their bodies. Gold had an antenna instead of a horn and Silver was always sad.

Compared to the rest of the crew, I found myself constantly drawing Gold. This was also my attempt to make a drawn model of Gold when I was messing around with Blender. I haven't gotten around to fixing my old laptop, it was misplaced sometime before the break.

Gold Gemitaurus and Copper Cephei:

I didn't know what I was doing when outlining these characters. There was just a black outline with inside lines being darker than the color inside. I also had a thing for black belts or rings/bands on characters too.

Left: Ube Cephei-Sirius | Right: An older version of Ube Cephei-Sirius with Lumens, late-spirits of young Stars or Stellars

I had trouble choosing colors for Ube, either having a vibrant purple or a dull purple. So far, I had stuck with the more vibrant shade of purple.

Bone Aratumi:

I don't think I ever got around to digitally drawing Bone Aratumi. This is the most recent drawing I have made. He is similar enough to Gold's brother, Bone Gemitaurus. Bone Gemitaurus is the same type of Star, just with different tattoos and other physical differences.

Left: Yellow Andromeda-Eridanus | Right: A more recent sketch of Ube Cephei-Sirius and Yellow Andromeda-Eridanus

Yellow was very hard to draw in other poses, her hair was something that changed a lot before I got the hang of it. I did have a different type of hairstyle for her but I can't find the sketches. Perhaps at a later time.

Left: Lapis Asclepius | Right: Ube Cephei-Sirius and Lapis Asclepius

Lapis was the least character I drew, along with Bone Aratumi. I do plan to majorly redesign her along with everyone else.

Lavender Pink Veloctan:

Excuse the misspell, I was too interested in drawing and designing. But this was the only drawing I had of Lavender Pink, originally named Lavender Magenta. They'll have a major redesign as well, I am not happy with their hair and body proportions.

I never designed Sky Microscopium, despite describing its appearance in my senior thesis creative writing piece. Sky will be designed as well; I'll have to force my Chromebook to work with me.

I will have sketches of all the characters when I get the chance. I am open to any feedback so please tell me any suggestions, questions, or anything else.

#Gold Gemitaurus #Silver Kentaurus-Sirius #Copper Cephei #Ube Cephei-Sirius #Bone Aratumi #Yellow Andromeda-Eridanus #Lapis Asclepius #Lavender Pink Veloctan #Sky Microscopium #Star Shooters #SS #my old artwork #science fiction #artists on tumblr #artblr #original characters #original art

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nc-vb · 22 days

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ik you have a list of recommended manga and stuff, but what are your top favourites??? like your personal faves

I think I've read way too many in my life to make a sane list of them, but imma do my best LMAO (pls I have 1000 tabs open between my phone browser and private browser and my tablet ;-;). I'll give you both bl and straight manga/manhwa ok??

Sign (18+, bl)

This was one of my first bl manhwa I ever read (before I spiralled down the rabbit hole). IT'S SO SWEET, the mc Soohwa gets a job at the ml's cafe, and the ml Yohan is deaf-- Yohan loves when Soohwa signs at him, and Soohwa loves when Yohan talks, and they're both just so so cute, I love this manhwa with all my heart.

The manhwa is completed!!

2. Paljae, Child of Winter (shounen ai)

Where do I even begin with this one, holy shit... the art style would be gripping me by the balls if I had some. It gives a little of tcgf AND mdzs vibes tbh??? the mc Munryeong starts to take care of this tiny "child" he names Paljae but there's a couple of plot twists and surprises that I don't want to spoil, it's SO GOOD.

It's currently ongoing BUT it's on a break before it starts its third season!!!!

3. Pink Heart Jam (18+, bl)

Probably one of my favourite manga; I don't remember much of it so I'm going to reread it-- it's short, about 11 chapters? and it has to do with a band, but the mc and ml are *chef's kiss* wonderful

4. Payback (18+, bl)

I... have many words I could use to express my love for Payback. Jay and Yoohan are skskhsks I NEED A CERTAIN PLOT THING TO HAPPEN BUT IT'S KILLING ME THAT'S IT'S SLOW BURN. Lots of angst and unraveling of truths and facts and it's kind of a revenge story but GOD, those two are so hot, I blush, I blush.

5. Cherry Magic (18+ish, bl)

IT WAS SO GOOD THEY MADE AN ANIME AND A LIVE ACTION SHOW ABOUT THEM OKAY, THAT SAYS ENOUGH, MY CUTIE PATOOTIES AHHHHH

6. One Summer Day (18+, bl)

I just recently started this and it has 50+ chapters so far, but it's by the same artist etc. as Sign!!! it's really good. The mc died and then undied because of an accident he and a Grim Reaper cause, so he's in limbo, alive but is scheduled to re-die once his name gets re-added to a death list or something, but he had a lasting regret because he never had a relationship or anything further, so the Grim Reaper has to give him "organic energy" to calm down those "regrets"... hehehe.

7. The Guild Member Next Door (18+, bl)

I'm putting 18+ for now because I believe the novel for this has smut/sex scenes, but it just hasn't been drawn into the manhwa yet. It's super cute!!! mc plays an online game and meets the ml there, but they don't know who they are irl yet (there's 30 chapters), but the mc ends up moving next door to the ml and the ml thinks the mc is stalking him bc of some previous incidents due to this game-- it's cute. Just read it.

8. Dear Door (18+, bl)

EXTREMELY 18+ SHFSLKLS the ml has to engage in sexual frivolities with the mc in order to open a "door" to hell. This is a completed manhwa with 150+ chapters, a side story (iirc), and some really interesting plot twists. WARNING: this does also contain some dubcon/noncon stuff with certain characters (not including the mc and ml, but also kind of, it's weird). But the story ends on a good note, it's one of my favourites EVER.

9. A House for Samsami (18+, bl)

If you're a fan of hybrid, golden retriever-like characters, this one's for you! A veterinarian finds a stray hybrid on the street and takes him in, and I should reread this because I don't remember the details, but I love the characters, and I really recommend this one for its cuteness. Only 13 chapters so far, I believe; it's slow uploads.

10. Our Sunny Days (18+, bl)

PUREEEEEE PUREEEEE I LOVE THEM SO MUCH AHHHHH

The mc is a single father after a woman he'd been with leaves him with a baby and leaves, and he moves into a small village town where he meets the ml who's like, the village chief, and they both start crushing on each other and sjhfsks d'aww it's just so sweet, I love them. The first season is done at 25 chapters!

11. Bailin and Li Yun & Fathoms of Atonement (bl)

Both of these are by the same artist and are both on Webtoon. They have shorter chapters and one of them just became a Webtoon Original (finally!!!). I won't spoil these ones much; both have to do with merman... enjoy~

12. Mimori's Naughty Mouth (18+, bl)

AHHHH SUPER HOT AND THE MC AND ML ARE HOT TOOOOO, ml is a dentist and mc has a sensitive mouth, like insanely sensitive, so going to the dentist is a nightmare for him... until he gets this dentist. Hehe.

Now for the straights *cracks fingers*

Do Androids Dream of Love? (18+)

After mc's father dies (or someone dies, idr), she's left an android to take care of her, and she's against it at first, but he's very sincere and kind and is programmed to want to take care of her, but he finds himself going against his coding a bit and starts falling in love with her and vice versa... vewy cute. Slow uploads, but long chapters; there's currently 16.

2. I Thought My Time Was Up!

Lariette, my cutie patootie, gets with another cutie patootie Duke, Asrahan, that happens to be cursed, and she happens to have the power to heal the curse, but she's not so strong that she can do it in one shot-- but she thinks she's dying in three months' time and makes a contract to date him for that time because she has a mini bucket list she'd like to complete with him. There's another character, Doha, who slowly falls for her as he heals her and helps train her in her magic. So so good, and Asrahan's blushing moments? oh my god. There's smutty themes, but nothing explicit since it's on Webtoon.

3. Iseop's Romance

Fuck me, reading this hurts my heart because the slow burn is reaaaaaaaal. The mc is the titular Iseop Tae's executive secretary and she's amazing at her job, something he has a complex about because they completed the same program together. The complex slowly turns into a crush and his internal monologues about it are the absolute funniest shit ever. It's on Webtoon at almost 40 chapters.

4. My In-Laws Are Obsessed with Me

SLOW BURN AS HELL I don't even think they've kissed in their almost 100 chapters?? The Lapileon family has a blood curse that kills anyone who touches the blood-- except the mc, Pereshati. I forget exactly why they agree to contract in marriage, I think it's to spite her own House or something, but all of the Lapileon's love Perry, and they start to investigate different things and Perry goes on a business venture-- it's so good, and I adore the art. Webtoon!

5. When Jasy Whistles

I remember crying when this went on its first break after the one season ended, like this story is so fucking good, I WEPT. Jasy Jatare is a rumoured "god" that steals people/children (for whatever reason), and Hela, the mc, has a friend (Rodrigo I think...) who is "taken" by him into a different world, one full of dangers and other tribes of people that either live beneath the thumb of the other gods there or are protected by some (very rare). Hela wants to get her friend back and works with Jasy on a certain condition-- at 100 chapters, a lot happens between them. Sexual themes but not explicit; again, this is on Webtoon.

6. Harem of Luu-Anh (18+, poly)

Ughhhh I love this series. The one on Webtoon is sfw BUT the artist has a Patreon where they post the 18+ series... It's worth it to become their Patron to see it all. The story is well over 100 chapters by now (I believe), plus the Patreon has additional stories having to do with Luu-Anh and her FOUR HUSBANDS, YEAH FOUR HUSBANDS AND THEY'RE ALL FUCKING HOT it's worth it whew.

7. Trapped

I have to catch up in this series... There's about 200 chapters to it, but Chae-A was dealt a shit hand through life and again when she runs into the ml who is a VAMPIREEEEE he's hot though, it's fine, and she's fiery, and it makes for a good enemy to lover story, I SWEAR BY IT.

8. Selina ~ Moon Bride ~

Whyever the fuck Webtoon hasn't turned this into an Original, I'll never get. It is so beautiful, the lore and the characters are so amazing, like... I can't even put into words how much I love and recommend this. Please go read it; it has 228 CHAPTERS Y'ALL AND IT IS A DELICIOUS READ, it's been going on since 2016 but the artist had taken a huge break in between; it updates a few times a month-- PLEASE GO READ AND SUPPORT IT!!! on Webtoon.

9. Tonari no Seki no Hen na Senpai~ (18+, yandere)

Guilty pleasure. Had to pop this in. WAITING FOR THAT EIGHTH FUCKING CHAPTER IS AS PAINFUL AS WAITING FOR A RAMEN CUP TO FINISH HEATING. The ml is obsessed and in love with the mc, and she's put off by it quite a bit because he goes overboard when she finds out, but he's a puppy dog yandere-- imma go read this again tn, tbh. Ahhhh I love it. Want it for myself. Sigh.

All of my other recommendeds is in this list!!

I hope you enjoy all of them; if you want to talk and squeal about them with me, my dms are always open~

#✦ nice chats.#manga recs #manhwa recs #bl manhwa

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galactichelium · 11 months

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Man. This is the least I have drawn in like, at least 10 years. I don't know why I've been lacking in ideas. Though, admittedly, on the 1 or 2 ideas I have been able to come up with, due to not drawing for so long, now I've lost my rhythm with drawing and nothing even comes close to looking right. Augh. I really hope I'm able to get back into drawing eventually. Because I really do love drawing.

Extended ramble below the cut 😭. It wasn't supposed to be so long but it just kept getting longer. Basically, tl;dr: There are SO many fucking factors that have seemingly contributed to this. More than I realised before making this post, even.

I think probably part of this also is my chronic pain, because I think I first got into this art block back in December 2021. Of which being when my chronic pain started getting really bad. Though, back then it wasn't as bad as it has become. Up until around August 2022 I was still for the most part making a drawing a month. But since then, I've only drawn 2 drawings. One in December, and then one in February. And I didn't even post the February one.

Another potential factor is that, well, my art blog url is "officialkarkat". At the time, it did feel like a proper expression of me, as I tied a lot of my sense of identity to this character, but. Around the same time my chronic pain started getting worse weirdly enough, was around the time when I began to realise that while initially doing this did help me figure out a lot about myself, at this point, it felt more like something I was hiding behind. Not being my true self. (Not that I'm not a kinnie anymore, I am, but yeah.) But then I've been stuck on what to do, because I've HAD that url for 2 or 3 years, and I also still can't even think of anything better lmfao.

There's also the fact that I did get a job in October 2022. While I have very little hours, it still does get in the way because I always have work on Fridays. Almost always exclusively. So the rest of the weekdays I get stuck in ADHD "waiting" mode, waiting for work at the end of the week. And the weekends feel like a recovery period.

I also am now using a completely different art program as of December 2022. Because I've been trying to switch computers, but wanted Linux on my newer one, but I couldn't get CSP to work on it despite my numerous attempts at different methods. So while I have completed 2 drawings using my new art program of choice (Krita), and have become more familiar with it by messing around in it every now and again, it still doesn't quite feel like home. Does that make sense.

And last potential factor. My newer computer is a desktop computer instead of something like my Surface Pro was, which, in hindsight, was a kick in the foot. I thought it'd be better because I could get better specs for cheaper with a desktop. And I thought that getting a graphics tablet would be all that I needed to get right back into it. But I didn't realise just how essential being able to pick up a pen at any time and just start drawing was, to my drawing process. Back then this was true, but even more so now with my chronic pain, of which gets worse with inactivity, thus making big drawing sessions impossible. Though when I got this desktop (June 2021), that was yet to be a big factor. I mostly only even got a new computer because well... my surface pro, at the time, was 8 years old. Now it's 10 years old. I got it second-hand 5 and a half years ago from eBay. It could now probably fall apart at any moment. I'm surprised it hasn't already. Though there are a lot of problems with it tbf. However all this being said, having my desktop computer has helped with chronic pain in a different way. Y'know, having more proper posture. But it still comes at a cost with how accessible drawing is.

But honestly, out of all of these. The two biggest factors getting in the way right now I feel like are the fact that I'm very out-of-practice, making it harder to get back into it, and the chronic pain. But. Augh. All of these different things happening all at once 😭

#Iron text

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lordartsy · 2 years

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A3! 5 year anniversary countdown: ~After-talk~

This is basically an annoyingly long A/N, none of you have to read it.

January's now over...!! How'd you guys do in the event? I was completely and utterly destroyed by it! ☆

I mean, imagine me, alright? I'm just a little guy. I've got like 300 something something gems to spend, and I have two favorite characters, I'm gonna try getting them both!

So I get kazu, right? Cool! My future's looking bright! Maybe I can get tsuzu too, right? Wrong!

I could sit here and complain about my rolls in detail, but the long and short of it is that I got a LOT of itarus and citrons (one full bloomed r itaru, one full bloomed sr itaru, an ssr christmas itaru, and SIX anniversary citrons!! Thats enough citrons to form a whole wakiwaki-gumi!!). I call them the Partners In Crime Duo (Sr +60%) because they basically robbed me blind

Murder! I spent like 800+ on the spring scout alone, dude!

And tsuzuru's in the tease for the next event...!!? All this pain and suffering...!!

.... Welp, setting my grudges aside.

Doing the anniversary series was a real educational experience for me. I learned a lot of things, like:

- doing something that takes as much time as this series did requires a lot of planning ahead, and its my bad for winging it

- how to draw like 23 different flowers

- being passionate about your work is cool and all but not sleeping and forgetting to eat will land you in the hospital! (twice!!)

- a weak tablet (broken screen) + pointy finger (worn out from drawing/gaming) is NOT an optimized drawing set-up (and one of these days im gonna get me a proper drawing tablet but for now, I'll have to make do)

Because of said unoptimized set-up on top of an already bumpy schedule, there were a lot of ideas i had to throw out the window in order to make room for time (even though compromising on backgrounds/shading/details/etc. was already supposed to give me more time, :ugly_crying:). Of course there are sketches and ideas thats completely different from the final product, but i also wanted to draw some minor characters as part of the countdown if i had the time to. Unfortunately, Sakoda decked out in full "Sakyo Oshi" gear is gonna have to wait.

Speaking of concepts and ideas, here are the anniversary pictures that i had planned to go together! (read: PLANNED to go together— they don't, but i hastily edited it to make it kinda look like it does??)

Hindsight powers activating, i really should've drawn them together THEN separated them instead of drawing them separately from the start. Ahh, let this be yet another learning experience for me.

Yknow, the original idea was to have a very simple piece of the character just going about their day, followed by a <100 words essay about something i like about them. It was like that for the first few days and then I completely threw it out the window the more into it I got. Sorry for making you guys read essays about my thoughts on the characters, I literally didn't mean it.

.... No, screw it. I promised myself not to say anything mean about the game or the characters during the entire run, but im sick of being nice to these guys! I'm gonna say something mean about every single one of them!!

Sakuya's an airhead, dense main character edition! Masumi's a creep! Tsuzuru's ordinary as hell! Itaru's a goddamn gremlin! Citron's a weirdo! Chikage :/ Tenma's a pompous rich kid! Yuki's an asshole! Muku's head is stuffed with nothing but clouds! Misumi is literally some kind of alien! Kazunari's annoying! Kumon's obnoxious! Banri :/ Juza's an airhead, socially incompetent edition! Taichi has nothing going on in the brain! Omi kindly shares his brain cells with Taichi, but at what cost! Sakyo's a boomer! Azami's a brat! Tsumugi and Tasuku share a single brain cell, and they lost it during a street act! Hisoka acts like a pain in the ass! Homare's pretentious! Azuma's a slut! Guy is an airhead, language barrier edition!

..... If you've read any of my posts you would know i dont mean any of that (... some of these, at least). Coming up with some of those was very hard; insulting these guys was a lot harder than i thought it'd be.

If you somehow read through all of that, then thank you! Thank you for putting up with the things I say, and thank you for supporting the countdown series! Seeing the things people say in the tags has been a wonderful experience for me, and I'm glad to have provided some sort of entertainment for you all! Thank you again, and see you next time!

#and shoutout to the people on discord who noticed me changing my status everyday #'countdown to the 27th: day x' followed by an emoji representing the character im drawing that day #a3!#act! addict! actors!#isuke matsukawa #kamekichi #no more long captions i swear!!#the long captions are a series exclusive and i will not be doing them again!!#also i had my 200 days celebration a few days ago can i get a Yeehaw #if the formatting of this post is a little gross then im sorry i had to edit this on three different devices and im figuring it out

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alkalinefrog · 3 years

Note

hey, so, I had an art related question... if all of this is too much, feel free to ignore it.

the backstory is that I've had the same laptop since early high school but recently I had a birthday (I'm 28 now). my parents got me an HP laptop, and my friend got me a tablet, which she bought off of an online friend for $30. the problem is that I haven't had new technology like... ever? none that was actually mine anyway, and certainly nothing that could handle me using it for art.

and this is especially a problem when it comes to the tablet. my friend helped me get firealpaca onto the laptop, and get the tablet set up with the right drivers, aaaaand... I cannot make one line that looks good using it. I've been using pen and paper for so long and I have a really light touch, and it feels like I have to jam the pen down to get it to register, at which point I might as well have not set the pen sensitivity to anything at all because the thickest line is the only kind I can make?? any lighter and it won't show up on the screen at all. like I can ctrl+z and it doesn't even go back a step, the line didn't get drawn. there's like a 20% chance that any line I try to put down won't actually register. and tbh this isn't really what I had wanted... it's a huion tablet, which is the brand I wanted, but I was gonna buy myself one where you can see what you're drawing on the screen of the tablet itself. not just due to coordination issues, I think I could get used to that part, but because I feel like I wouldn't be having this specific problem with getting things to register. every single line I make looks like crap with this tablet, it makes me feel like I might as well be drawing with my feet, and I've been fidgeting with settings, and it doesn't seem like anything helps. I also still don't have a mouse for the laptop yet, so I can't click and drag anything very well because it has a trackpad, so messing with sliders is already aggravating.

I feel so lost and overwhelmed, and like if I buy anything else, I'm just going to end up with more unusable stuff because *I'm* probably the problem. I just don't know anything, and trying is mentally fatiguing me so quickly... my brain knows what I want my art to look like, and my hands can do it with a real pen. I just have absolutely no clue how to make this machine produce anything.

so I guess my questions are stuff like, what equipment do you use? are there tablets that will register a light touch or am I really going to have to be this heavy handed in order to work with one? what resolution/canvas size do you usually work on? any recommendations for what program to use?

overall, I'd really like to get myself something that feels more intuitive than the tablet... honestly, I was finding some success drawing with just my finger on the touch screen of my phone at one point. there were still a lot of problems with that, but the nail in the coffin was that my phone's memory space filled up and I had to get rid of the drawing app to make it functional again (it's an iphone, which is why). maybe I should just get an ipad or something...? though, one more thing on the mountain of potential options is the last thing my crumbling ADHD brain needs. I've been taking a break from art in general because I've still maintained my 40-hours-a-week work schedule through the whole pandemic... I do 10 hour shifts and work overnight, so I technically have free time since I only work 4 days a week, but the type of work I do leaves me with no energy at all. so I've been in an art slump and I've been wanting to get out of it, but this is just making art feel impossible, even though the whole reason why I've always wished I could draw digitally is so that I can color digitally. I had been drawing things in pen and scanning them to color in photoshop, but cleanup takes so long that I literally can't produce finished work anymore. I'm out of options that aren't prohibitively labor intensive and frustrating.

this was probably way too much information, but if you have any advice I'd be really grateful.

Huh, well first off HAPPY BIRTHDAY DUDE!! Congrats on the sweet new tech (even if it's been a bit frustrating) and well-deserved celebration!

From the sounds of it I think the main issue is probably your tablet (this is pure speculation on my end though, so you know, grain of salt and all). You're right in that you shouldn't have to fight against your equipment. I have a really light touch too and I've never had the same issue. I personally don't have any experience with huion tablets, but if you're having trouble getting your lines to register then it might have been worn down by the previous user. It's not so much about buying a monitor (the screen one) vs. tablet so much as getting working equipment.

An iPad is a great alternative!! I've played around with the apple pencil and procreate and it's a super intuitive program with (obviously) super easy set up! You get the drawing on the screen AND really nice pen pressure. I'm really happy seeing it opening up new doors for more people to get into digital art!

In terms of your current laptop/tablet situation:

My set up rn is pretty pricey ngl; I have a PC desktop computer with a 16 inch Wacom Cintiq. Getting started in digital art doesn't mean you have to drop a bag on a ton of equipment right from the get go though! If you're looking for a safe small investment, I'd recommend getting a Wacom Bamboo pen tablet!

This lil' baby right here is what I started with!! I think cost-wise it floats around 70ish bucks, but that's exponentially more affordable than buying a huge monitor. One of my friends who's also a pro artist uses a similar small tablet because it works great! That's an alternative that might be worth looking into.

You can also get free trials on other drawing programs (clip studio paint is a great one!) To test and see if it's a software issue with firealpaca.

You could also try checking online forums to see if anyone else is running into similar issues, or watch some YouTube videos of people reviewing different tablets. I know this might be even more overwhelming, so I'd try and narrow the scope to focus on one thing at a time.

My best advice right now would actually be to get a mouse, or any other accessories you need. I've also been in your shoes where I was completely overwhelmed, and I can say that checking off all the small easy things makes a HUGE difference! It makes you feel more in control of the situation, and even if you're still having trouble with digital art you can at least get more comfortable using your laptop in the mean time.

You got this dude!! I believe in you!!

EDIT:

Thanks @wooliebirds!

#ask #anonymous #advice

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songofclarity · 3 years

Note

Omg I love your headcanons about WRH being LSZ's bio dad and fully support them!

Do you have any ideas about the mom though?

I personally think LSZ took the most after her in looks and temperament (because if the Jin saw a wen child that looked like WRH in the labor camps they would've killed him right away) I suppose after losing both his sons in such a traumatic way, a grieving WRH would be more drawn to someone kind and gentle and compassionate on whose shoulder he could cry and be vulnerable.

Idk if a-yuan was a planned child or an "oopsie" baby but either way he was the product of a healthy loving 100% consensual relationship and both parents wanted and loved him (I hate it when WRH's character is reduced to "perverted abusive rapist" just because he's an antagonist, we already have JGS godammit!)

also I want the madam Wen from "heliocentric" in there too because that woman gives me chills and interfering in WRH's sex life is maybe her way of coping with his lack of interest in herself by being indirectly part of his romances but it's still so weird and creepy lol

I'm also thinking MY was involved in LSZ's mom's death. Maybe she was getting suspicious of him or she was trying to convince WRH to negotiate for a peaceful end to the war... Etc either way her being alive wasn't in MY's advantage so she had to go, and I don't think MY would hesitate to murder an innocent young mother if it served his purposes after all he did to gain WRH's favor. Also if WRH loses that source of emotional support he would become easier for MY to manipulate and betray

Sorry this was meant to be a short ask about LSZ's birth mother's headcanons but I ended going off the rails lol

Yay, more support for Wen RuoHan as Wen Yuan's dad! And everything you said about the mom is great, I'm a fan!

I don't exactly have solid headcanons on the mom, but I do have a collection of options in mind depending on what I'm in the mood for! I have been sitting on another ask which asks me how I imagine Madam Wen and I have been planning to go through a few versions of her on that, including the one(s) that could be Wen Yuan's mom lol

Love Wen Yuan looking more like her though 🥺 While I do acknowledge this passage exists:

Wen Ning, "I thought every single person from out sect was dead. I really didn't expect that A-Yuan would still be alive. He looks so much like my cousin when he was around twenty." (ch. 89, ERS)

Wen Ning was looking for Wen resemblance in Lan SiZhui, so he would be searching for all the similarities with Wen RuoHan first. Considering the Jin viewed the Wen Remnants like animals, little Wen Yuan would hardly be recognized with dirt on his face and dirty clothes. Plus baby fat~ Jin GuangYao might have recognized him, but Wen RuoHan's whole household would have been killed in Nightless City by the Sunshot Campaign, so no one is looking for Anastasia a missing baby in the aftermath.

I also like to consider that Granny Wen is Wen Yuan's maternal-grandmother, and she took care of him when everyone, including her daughter/his mother, were reeling from Wen RuoHan's death. Maybe Wen Yuan's mother didn't want to leave her husband, and sat staunchly at his casket/tablet, dressed in white, even as the gates of Nightless City were broken in...

Let Wen Yuan's mother love Wen RuoHan! 🥺 Let them be sweet together! A lady both gentle yet strong, which comes with the territory of having to stand out of a very large crowd to get Wen RuoHan's attention in the first place. And when she has him, she has him! Let Wen RuoHan love her, too! 🥺

And while I don't think their relationship is at all a political/alliance one as I headcanon her from a clan already loyal to the Wen, I think there would have been some pressure on her (not by Wen RuoHan) to maybe do whatever needed to be done to encourage a pregnancy. For one thing, the Wen Clan survives on the prevalence of the Wen bloodline, so a new little Wen heir would improve morale vs the Sunshot Campaign. For another thing, I headcanon Wen RuoHan just loving being a dad and having a family in general. But he is grieving the loss of his last family. So an "oopsie" baby for Wen RuoHan, who is not in the mindset to have children right now, while more or less planned by everyone else. I think it would be something he didn't think he knew he wanted, however, and he would be very happy along with his wife~!

The Madam Wen from Heliocentric is a unique case and I would love to explore her role in a story where Wen Yuan is Wen RuoHan's child (not necessarily their child, for reasons not yet revealed lmao). And also, I *have* thought about Meng Yao doing more dastardly deeds in Nightless City exactly as you describe. If the Wen are expected to all die at the hands of the Sunshot Campaign anyway, what's the difference between now or later besides the risk of getting caught? Since Meng Yao plans to betray and kill Wen RuoHan, what's the life of one innocent women on the side to help get him there? There are plenty of ways to make it look like an accident, and then Wen RuoHan is easy picking...

Which just means I need more AU where the story changes and headcanoning more Wens doesn't just mean more dead Wens 😂 Happy Wen family, please!

#asked from above #anon #mdzs thoughts #lan sizhui #wen yuan #wen ruohan #wen fam #madam wen #although not necessarily a madam wen #this ask gave me a good canon divergent fic idea lol

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boop-le-snoot · 3 years

Text

PARTY FAVOURS I A THIRSTY INTERLUDE

First time reader click here

Bun Bun at 2:30 AM posting: This is 110% pornography. I wrote that when I was feeling extra thirsty over Tony and his Nano suit so yeah... A bit of choking a bit of mild suit bondage. Daddy kink 👉🏻👈🏻🥺 BDSM themes. Humor & porn. Has minimal correlation with the story and can be read as standalone smut-shot. Inspired by this NSFW tik tok audio (headphones!).

"OH MY GOD, NO! NO, NO, SHIT, FUCK, NO!"

"Princess, what's wrong?" Steve's worried voice rang high in the kitchen, followed by an alarming clattering of the dishes against the sink. "Are you hurt?" He didn't even remark on my use of profanity, which meant I'd startled the Captain for sure. He appeared in the doorway ready to fight, run; his eyes immediately drawn to his shield in the corner.

"Only what's left of my dignity," I sighed.

"Oh, okay," He visibly sagged, tension leaving his voice and his body. "What happened?"

I inhaled several times, feeling heat creep up my neck and blossom on my cheeks. It took a lot, and I mean A LOT, to make me feel embarrassed enough to fumble my words and palm my face but that was exactly what I did. "Well, umm... Tony found a couple of thirst tweets. Mine, from my sophomore year. And uh, retweeted them." I thought I'd cleaned up my social media quite well, actually. My fingers twitched remembering manually sorting through thousands of posts. Apparently, my fingers weren't clever enough.

Steve snorted, evidently having had someone tell him what a thirst tweet was. He, however, did not understand the sheer mortification that I would be subjected to at the hands of Tony. And my classmates. And Peter, oh my God. Natasha and Wanda too, probably. And Loki.

I. Was. Toast.

"How bad was it?" Bucky piped up, finally having dealt with the mini laughter fit.

"Not worse than what you two get up to in the gym when you think nobody is home," I immediately retorted in hopes of avoiding teasing from the metal-armed man. He would take the chance, of course, he would.

"Oof, I'm sorry, doll," Bucky whistled sympathetically. And promptly pulled out his phone, to, what I assumed, see the offending social media posts for himself. I assumed correctly. Bucky was bent over laughing in no time - was it my doing or did Tony's own commentary on them that made the whole situation so hilarious to the gramps on steroids?

"I will light you on fire," I seethed but remained where I was standing. There was no point in doing anything about them now. Screenshots were probably already being saved on everybody's devices.

Steve peeped over his boyfriend's shoulder, chuckling. "You had a crush on Tony? That's embarrassing, doll." He had the audacity to give me an innocent smile before returning to his dishwashing.

"Punk, I don't know if - and I quote: Not to be That Girl™ - it's trademarked, by the way - but Tony Stark could hit it and quit it and I wouldn't even be mad - qualifies as a crush." Bucky pointed out, the sound of his voice being drowned out by Steve's guffaws. "And this one definitely does not qualify for it to be a romantic setting. Listen: I'm not a fucking bottom, okay?.. there are seventeen question marks. But, like, can Tony Stark choke me in one of his Iron Man suits - nine more question marks." Bucky joined his partner's laughter, unable to continue.

I was literally on fire. My face burned, my hands shook. I had the strongest urge to stick my index fingers in my ears and loudly yell "la-la-la" until both fossils ceased to roast me like I was some sort of holiday brisket. "I hate you. I will burn... The heart... Out of you," I seethed.

"O-oh, honey bu-un, da-arling..." I heard Tony's sing-song voice happily calling for me. Too happily. Not good.

I had literal seconds to get myself scarce out of this situation. I'd already avoided the dozen text messages, two calls in hopes the engineer would drop the topic and go back to his Big Bad Science Project. I had underestimated his persistent desire to cause chaos and his terrible, no-good sense of humor.

It was fun and games when we teamed up to prank our friends. I just never expected for the tables to be turned this way, y'know? Betrayal of the highest quality. The turntables had been turned - decidedly NOT in my favor.

In a brief moment of panicked clarity, I opened one of the empty bottom cabinets in the kitchen. It took some uncomfortable folding and maneuvering but I got myself inside and pressed the door shut seconds before his footsteps made the distinctive noise of sneakers on tile.

"Capsicle, Terminator," I heard Tony greet the two laughing supersoldiers. "Have you seen my Princess?"

I melted a little bit at the way Tony called me his, I won't lie.

"Nope," Bucky lied shamelessly.

"She's in the empty cabinet," Steve chuckled at the same time. Top 10 anime betrayals, right there.

"Wow - and I thought we were friends," Tony scoffed, I assumed at Bucky. My body tensed and I prepared to dial-up my puppy eyes to eleven. My hiding spot was wack.

The door was roughly tossed open, my eyes landing on Tony's oil-stained jeans. He crouched down, his brown eyes positively sparkling. The engineer's body radiated smug mischief, fingers twitching in anticipation.

"Sorry, Princess is unavailable right now. May I take a message?" I said, pulling on the cabinet door and fully prepared to slam it shut in his face. I was NOT ready for any more mortification.

Tony's chuckle shook me to the core, louder and ten times more expressive in the cramped, dark space of my temporary lair. "Come on out, baby girl. I didn't peg you for a wallflower."

"Duly noted," I said warily, having been expecting for him to drag me out and carry me to his bedroom, caveman style. I had noticed that my dorky self revved up his gears faster than any stereotypical seductive shit. It was no secret, at least not for us 'vengers, that Tony was a huge dork himself but I guess it takes one to know one.

"So, my suits, huh?" He smirked after a brief moment and just like that, I Did Not Like Where This Was Going. The receding footsteps and quiet snickering only confirmed my suspicions. Tony's form blocked the opening of the cabinet, crowding me even further into the already cramped space.

"Um," I found myself pretty much speechless. Part of me was excited and yearning - of fucking course I was curious if Tony Stark, genius and former playboy, had found a way to incorporate his suits of armor into the bedroom. Daresay, it was the question of the decade, according to Cosmopolitan, GQ, and a whole lot of other large media outlets.

The more sensible part of me screamed shame for that, playing with an essentially massive, powerful destruction machine. Something meant to protect millions of people from bad guys and aliens. It seemed blasphemous to waste such an important thing on scratching a curious itch.

I blinked owlishly, squirming.

"Okay, out you go." Tony's patience had run out and he withdrew himself, promptly standing up.

I heard the tapping of his fingers as I ungracefully stumbled out. He was occupied with his tablet so I turned around to adjust myself and the things on the countertop I had accidentally jostled in my rush to preserve some dignity.

An arm snaked around my waist, cold and unyielding, brushing against my exposed midriff with metal fingertips. Goosebumps followed the touch as I shivered involuntarily, stuttering in my breathing. "Fuck." The sound came out as if it was punched out of my throat with force, breathy.

"What's your safeword?" Tony's neatly groomed beard scratched against my ear. His voice was heavy and his lips were moist.

"Banana," I blurted the first thing that came into my mind. My body was hot and yet, I froze in place. The sheer power that the man behind me contained demanded unyielding obedience. I had no choice but to comply.

"Friday, lock the door. Nobody but me, in and out." Tony growled, pulling my hips into his metal-covered form.

Were we really doing this in the communal kitchen? With Steve and Bucky probably fully aware of what exactly was going on in here? Tony seemed to have zero reservations about that; in fact, I was almost sure he'd orchestrated the whole thing somehow. Steve owed like a dozen favors to the engineer.

The thick of Tony's leg firmly wedged itself between my thighs, spreading them open just enough so I was forced to put a slight arch in my back to keep still, my ass and shoulders firmly pressing against his Iron Man suit. I felt the coldness of the metal through my clothes, heard the hum of the nanobots in my ears.

My blood responded, heartbeat pulsing in my ears in sync with the electrical currents supplying the man behind me with the immense physical power to match his mental one. "Shit," The sound of my voice was faint. His other arm began creeping up my side to my shoulders, making an unmistakable beeline for my neck.

Tony applied firm pressure on it, wrapping the gauntlet carefully - not restricting the airflow, just steering me as he wished. And apparently, he had some very strong ideas about my current predicament: "Got me right where you wanted me?" He asked, low and breathy.

As I attempted to make noise, his hand tightened on my throat. Eyelids involuntarily sliding closed, my lips shook with the force it took me to muster up enough oxygen to hum a sloppy. "Mhm..."

"Can't hear you, baby girl," His cheek rested against mine, scratchy and hot and smelling like iron and gasoline and Tony.

Another shaky breath, I attempted to force the words out - for some reason, Tony's presence commanded me to obey him like never before. I nearly shivered from the sheer aura of power surrounding my man and it was his cue to lessen the careful pressure on my throat - just enough for blood to rapidly rush to my ears, making the world even hazier. "Yeah, Tony," It didn't take me much time to give him the enthusiastic consent he was looking for.

"Uh-uh," Tony tutted cheerfully. His other arm snaked around my waist, dipping lower to play with the hem of my skirt. God bless me for wearing a skirt! The rough pads of his fingertips scratched against the soft, sensitive flesh of my inner thighs. "I think we're past first name basis, baby," The suit retracted, mostly. The nanotech allowed for different parts of it to cover Tony's body in odd places: I felt the gauntlets and the arm braces, as well as part of a chest plate, but waist down my man was wearing simple jeans and tee.

"Uh," My brain supplied unhelpfully, feeling the bulge pressing against my ass. "Daddy?"

"That's my girl," I was rewarded with a groan, so sinful and delicious, falling from his lips straight into my ear. The hand that had gone down south cupped the mound of my pussy with a tender gesture. "Or Iron Man's?" He teased, grinding into me from behind.

"Yours," I keened obediently, my body seeming to find it impossible to decide between rubbing myself on his hand and his cock. It was a hard choice - pun absolutely intended. I was long uncomfortable in my panties and Tony's clever digits surely felt it, yet he made no further moves. "Daddy," I tried to put how much I ached for him into words.

Tony hummed, placing his wet mouth on the juncture of my neck for a moment. His hot breath seared my skin. The curious fingers finally, finally, reached the apex of my thighs. "Fuckin' shit, baby, you're..." He didn't bother finishing the sentence, speaking with his actions instead, scissoring his fingers between my labia, running the knuckles over my clit.

Just to feel me pant and shiver. I was sensitive and so aroused it was nearly unbearable. Tony always made me feel some type of way and, once again, my man had outdone himself. There was no shame left in me as I shifted my hips to the rhythm of his hand.

"Please?" I asked him prettily, knowingly that one little word would get me everything I wanted. A hard fucking, a new dress, a car, or, Hell, my own private island. My eyes were pretty when I begged, he had said. I would move the world for you, he had meant.

"Baby," The whisper was rushed as Tony turned me around and claimed my lips, hoisting my ass onto the marble countertop of the common kitchens. My legs wrapped around his hips, seeking the warmth and relief of his skin on mine. I wanted him inside of me, inconvenient location and two layers of clothing be damned. I wanted to bury myself in him until either of us couldn't tell who started and ended where.

"Daddy," I whispered into the thin line of his mouth, conveying my all-consuming need in a single word.

My skirt was hiked up in a second, the gauntlets of his suit still on his hands tearing my pants in a single clean motion. Eagerly, I scooted forward to pop the button on his jeans; grateful for the fact more often than not, Tony choose to forgo the belt whatsoever when working in the lab. Today was my lucky day.

His cock, red and thick and hard enough to pound nails with, weighed my hand down for barely a second beforehand Tony's gauntlets closed around both of my wrists, securing them to my chest. His other arm swiftly wrapped around me, pulling me close to him, as close as we could be together without sharing a single body. The blunt tip of his manhood stood at my entrance - not just teasing it but seeking permission.

One keen that seemed to come from deep insight my chest and I felt Tony's breath hitch as our sensitive flesh met; he filled me up at least as superbly as I hugged him. We shared a moan and a breath, just feeling each other, feeling the moment.

We were short on patience. Tony's hand slid onto the small of my back, urging our hips to meet each other, setting a punishing pace from the very start.

"Fuck, Daddy, oh God," I panted. I wasn't used to getting things started with so little prep.

"Baby," Tony rumbled, trying for stern, having it come out as breathless as I felt. "Shit, so fuckin' tight," His words garbled.

The sound of flesh slapping flesh was loud, perhaps, loud enough for certain enhanced folk to hear should they happen to pass the kitchen doors - and if that didn't make my insides clench in the most delectable ways.

Tony grunted in response, a lewd noise adding to the cacophony. "Gonna come?" His teeth caught my bottom lip, pulling it slightly. "For Daddy?" He asked, all traces of his usual cockiness gone, as he pulled away slightly to stare right in my wide eyes with his baby doe browns, equally blown with lust and longing.

Neither of us would last. "Yes, fuck, Daddy, please," I begged.

His hips angled just right, Tony continued mercilessly railing me, holding up my weak body between his arms. I felt the cold metal of the gauntlets through my shirt. The shivers ran across my skin in heaps, like busy little ants.

"Come for Daddy," Tony ordered, yanking me closer to hit that sweet spot deep inside of me. I couldn't resist the command, feeling the waves build up with every brutal stroke, clenching, muffling the screaming of my release in the crook of his neck, relishing in the growl that left his lips as he followed me, releasing my arms and folding his torso over mine. "Fuck," Was the only coherent word that left Tony's mouth, his seed creating a sticky mess between our legs.

"Yeah," I moaned, unwilling to part from him. It was intense. My world was spinning on its axis and my Tony was the center of it. He said something again, something soft and quiet, and my only concern was to rub my nose on his pulse point, to savor and remember the smell of our shared pleasure.

"Baby..." Tony sounded... Concerned. He withdrew slowly, frowning at my sleepy state. His frown only intensified when I absentmindedly rubbed my wrists - there were bound to be some marks left from the force of his grip. It was hot and it was... A surefire way to tell the suits weren't really adapted for bedroom games. Kitchen games.

"Daddy," I mumbled, sounding sad and pathetic to my own ears. I kind of wanted to cuddle and watch a movie but it seemed weird asking that from Tony since we've done crazier things and I had never felt like this, never got this greedy.

"Oh, baby, c'mere," He had come to some sort of conclusion. After re-doing his pants and picking up the scraps of fabric that used to be my panties, his arms made a comfortable nest. I was picked up without any troubles; the gauntlets had disappeared, too, into the thin golden bracelets around his wrists. I allowed myself to play with them, the shiny colors doing a good job of distracting me all throughout the brisk walk through the main living room and the swift elevator ride.

Tony's bed was messy, unmade and smelled like us - just the way I had left it that morning. Tony's hands were gentle as he stripped me and then swiftly chucked his own clothes.

"Watcha' doin'?" I asked as he wrapped his body around mine.

"Shh, we'll talk later," He murmured, looking slightly dazed himself. "Friday, put Stardust on the TV. 25% volume," As soon as the command was spoken, one of my comfort movies began playing on the large screen. Tony's hand kept stroking my hair and I didn't resist the temptation to close my eyes, settling into a peaceful lull atop the glowing white-blue of Tony's arc reactor.

My favorite color in the world, to be honest. It felt like I'd slept for ages when I opened my eyes to see the color again. "Um, hi," I supplied meekly, feeling way out of my depths from my own strange behavior.

"Mornin', Princess," Tony seemed joyful, the bags under his eyes a little less prominent than before.

I made moves to get out of the bed but he wrapped an arm around me, tugging me closer. "What do you know about sub drop?" He questioned me, in response to my vaguely confused noises.

That's what it was?!

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#tony stark smut #tony stark x reader #tony stark x you #tony stark x y/n #party favours #bun writes #THIS IS FILTH FROM THE MUDDY PLAYGROUNDS Y'ALL

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