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marvelstarker-mha98 · 7 months

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The Runaway Distance Life Of A Little Stark chapter 24: The Last Goodbye

Pairing: Tony Stark & daughter!Reader, Dr. Cho & Tony stark, Bruce Banner & Tony Stark

Summary: Tony and reader having heart to-heart talk warning: You have to read completely Co author with: callikc Previous Tag: @venomsvl @geeksareunique

The first thing Tony felt when he woke up was a painful migraine, a weight at the corner of his mind that somehow seemed heavier than his entire body.

Everything hurt, and yet, even in the glum room, the ticking had a relaxed feeling, as if it were a heart-beat at rest. He was in the medical bay. One of them anyway.

There were voices too. Quiet and murmured, but close all the same. It took a moment for his eyes to adjust, but he made sense of Dr. Cho and Bruce talking in the hushed whispers.

"No..." Dr. Cho was saying. "It's my responsibility to tell him."

Tony frowned, trying to turn to face them properly. Even that simple action hurt.

"Tell me what?" He managed to speak up in a croaky and strained voice.

The two were startled and turned to him with the same expressions of surprise and sudden guilt. Bruce looked pained, and Dr. Cho had a similar secretive yet sad look about her.

No one said a word.

Tony tried to sit up and ask again but grimaced as a sharp pain shot through his body. He held his abdomen and looked down to find a red-stained bandage wrapped around his middle.

"Well, shit." He mused, falling back on the bed.

"Yeah, I wouldn't do that." Bruce advised, doing his best to smile. "You got hurt pretty bad out there."

"I'm fine. Just a sting. I don't feel any..."

He trailed off as his mind was suddenly overcome by flashes of the fight with the masked man. The blows, the stabbing, and the words exchanged all came surging back as clear as day.

You were hurt too, far worse than he was. The last memory he had was of you in tortured pain, bleeding out.

"(Y/n)!" He exclaimed, looking over to Dr. Cho. "How is she?"

But he didn't get an answer, simply the same look of sorrow as earlier.

"Come on, don't hold out on me now, Doc." He said, attempting to lighten the mood.

It was as if the air was trying to suffocate the room. It was just so thin and heavy at the same time.

"She's in another recovery room." Dr. Cho explained. "Agent Barton is watching over her."

Relieved, Tony finally relaxed. A recovery room was always a good sign.

"Tony..." Dr. Cho hesitated, clearly conflicted on her own thoughts. "She's in critical condition. I'm sorry."

The relief crashed.

"But..." He struggled to figure out what to say or ask first. "But you said 'recovery room', what else is it for?"

"She's there because we did all we could and the rest is simply up to her. I removed a bullet from a shoulder wound inflicted a few hours before the other incident, but when I tried to reach the one in her abdomen we discovered it had broken and split. There was... There was an unidentified substance leaking from the fragments. We think it's poison."

"Then cure her!"

"Tony, we can't administer a cure without knowing what the problem is. A sample would've helped but whatever it was had already entered her bloodstream. It's damaged her organs."

"What..." His voice was now starting to crack from how quiet he had become. "What are you saying?"

"I'm so sorry. We don't know if she'll make it."

No. That wasn't good enough.

Without even thinking about his actions, Tony struggled to his feet and stumbled his way past them and to the door.

"Tony!" Bruce called.

It was futile. He wasn't listening to them. He didn't stop until he was right in front of the elevator and pressing the button desperately.

Of course it would be when he needed it the most that others were using it. It was moving too slowly. With every second wasted, you could be slipping away.

He wasn't there. He should have been, but he wasn't. Again.

His injury was starting to play up now, causing him to mutter and curse under his breath as he got more and more impatient with each floor the elevator stopped on.

He couldn't help but remember that moment. You were so close. He could see your smile through the pouring rain and the harsh winds, he could have reached out and wrapped you in a hug right then and there. But he was too late.

He remembered the bang of the shot and you collapsing on the hard ground. He remembered fighting the man and then feeling the knife plunge into his own skin. Now of course he was stuck with Dr. Cho's words.

'We don't know if she'll make it.'

With just one sentence his world was crashing down all over again.

"Tony!"

He turned around to find her and Bruce finally catching up, both breathless. He didn't realize how fast he'd been walking.

"I need you to listen to me!" Dr. Cho insisted, coming to a stop in front of him.

"No, you're lying!" He snapped. "She's not gonna die! Not after all this! Not after all the hell she went through!"

"Enough!" Bruce ordered, uncharacteristically grabbing Tony by the shoulder and forcing him to turn his way instead. "She's not lying, Tony. I looked at (Y/n) myself and it's true. I'm truly sorry, but under the circumstances... It's dire at best."

Tony wanted to fight and argue, to insist it was all some ridiculous scheme cooked up for twisted humor, but Bruce wouldn't do that to him. To anyone for that matter. If he could trust anyone to be truthful, it would be him.

You were dying.

He let out a choked sob, hands over his middle as he fell to his knees. Bruce cautiously wrapped his arms around Tony's shoulders, the billionaire shaking as he took it all in.

"I'm sorry." Bruce whispered.

Tony closed his eyes tightly as the tears fell, holding onto his friend's arms as he cursed and cried. "What am I supposed to do?" He trembled.

"There isn't anything to do." Bruce confessed. "What happens next is entirely up to (Y/n)."

"But she's my kid! I can't lose her again... I'm supposed to protect her from the world and all I've done is let it destroy her."

"No, Tony. You've done the best you can, and you never stopped looking for her. That's the only thing any parent can do."

Despite his friend's assurances, all Tony could hear were Dr. Cho's words telling him you were going to die, and the masked man taunting him about the very same thing.

Back in the present, Tony was standing in the doorway with labored breathing. He had both hands over his bandaged wound as the stabs of pain kept spiking up.

"Dad..."

You looked so vulnerable from his point of view. The machines connected to your stomach looked far too complicated and horrible, and the slow beat of your heart on the monitors was more haunting than reassuring.

"We'll give you some time." Dr. Cho spoke up, smiling sadly.

Tony entered the room slowly and unsurely, and with each step feeling like the weight of the world. The door soon closed behind him, leaving only the two of you in the room.

"Miss me?" You asked in a meek voice.

Tony couldn't speak at first. He just managed a shaky nod as his eyes sparkled with tears again. He practically fell into the chair at your bedside.

"Can I..." He hesitated, worried that you wouldn't be happy to see him or that you were too hurt. "You know..."

You knew what he was trying to ask and nodded. "I'd like a hug, yeah."

Relieved, he quickly wrapped his arms around you. You did the same, unable to believe that you finally got the chance. When you were sixteen, this didn't seem possible, all you did was fight and bicker. You couldn't believe it took years of separation to finally appreciate each other.

You stayed as you were for what felt like forever. You were afraid to let go now. You knew you didn't have long, and you were okay with that in the long run, but this moment felt too perfect - too fulfilling - to let go. You just had so much to say.

"I'm sorry." You whispered, closing your eyes tightly.

Tony held you close, shaking his head lightly. "You have nothing to be sorry for, (Y/n)."

"But I do." You reluctantly pulled back so you could look him in the eyes. "I left with no warning, scared everyone, scared myself."

"It's okay-"

"But it's not, though. Everyone says it is, but I was a stupid kid who got scared and chose the easy way out. Even after-" You paused, wincing at the memories. "After you dealt with Obadiah and everything, I should've come home. But I didn't. I got paranoid and I didn't want the people I cared about getting hurt."

He didn't reply for a moment, considering your words. Then, with a light sigh, he nodded.

"I can't lie and say I wasn't mad, because I was." He confessed. "But when I found out why, I realized it was my fault."

You went to argue but he held up a hand to stop you.

"It's the truth." He continued. "I was so harsh on you, I never... I wasn't a dad. I realized how much I missed out on and I wanted to fix it so I didn't end up like my old man. And you're here now and it's good. You got scared and that's okay, you still managed to look after yourself. I do think SHIELD was a poor career choice but you do you."

You choked out a laugh. "That's the part you're concerned about?"

"Have you even seen the conditions in those places? Disgusting. And cheap."

"Maybe. But it wasn't all bad. I had people, and Fury always looked out for me."

That was another thing Tony didn't like. He was annoyed and even jealous that Fury was the one who was there when he couldn't be. Fury was the one who got to talk to you every day and see all your work, not him.

"Well, you're fine now." He said, trying to focus on the happier aspects of the situation. "You're home, and you're - you will be - okay."

Your smile fell.

He knew.

It was the way he said the words with such... Diffidence. Self-distrust. The way he had suddenly looked away and forced any tears away.

He knew you weren't going to make it.

You tried to smile again but it was weak and small, the epitome of hopelessness. "I'm not."

Tony looked back at you, a little surprised. "Hey, of course you are."

"No." You shook your head. "I know I'm not fine. I know I'm dying. I'm checking out, biting the dust, the whole shebang."

How was he supposed to react?

How was he supposed to try and pretend you weren't stating facts?

How was he supposed to live with himself knowing by that time tomorrow you'd be nothing but a memory?

So he didn't say anything. He simply looked down and held your hand in silence.

"I'm sorry." He whispered tearfully.

"Everyone is apparently." You mused, still hoping to keep the topic light.

"(Y/n), I-" Once again, the words fell short. "This wasn't supposed to happen. It was - It wasn't supposed to go this way. You weren't supposed to get hurt."

"Look, I don't regret what I've been through. I've had ups and downs, super highs and some really low lows, but they all led me here, back to you. That's all I care about. You don't have to be sorry for that because I'm definitely not. I forgave you a long time ago."

But the words only hurt more. It made facing the upcoming hours even harder than they were meant to be.

"You shouldn't." He said, still unable to meet your eyes again. "I don't deserve it. I'm arrogant and selfish and I never listened. I spent time with so many different people yet somehow forgot about the most important of all. I missed... All of it. Even when I realized my mistakes I couldn't fix them. I couldn't save you."

"Maybe that matters, and maybe it doesn't. It's true you were arrogant and selfish, got around and cared for no one but yourself, but you've changed."

You remembered being a teenager, pissed off and confused about why your own dad spent all his time with literally anybody but you. He seemed to have more of a connection with his hookups than his own daughter. If it wasn't plain ignorance and loathing, it was parties or business or personal projects. Something always seemed to come up when you tried to act like a real family.

"Yeah, you're different." You decided, looking down at your hand in his. It made you smile. "Since starting the hero craze, you changed for the better."

You remembered finding out your dad was Iron Man. The shock and disbelief and pure awe had lingered for days afterwards. You remembered being oddly prideful at one point, though you didn't really want to admit it to yourself back then.

"I was proud, you know." You admitted. "I mean, how many people can brag about their dad being a goddamn superhero? I was still angry of course, but... Yeah. I was happy too. You were out there protecting the entire planet. You fought the bad guys and protected the good. You helped people who couldn't help themselves, you saved them, gave them a chance few ever get."

You remembered reading all the articles about the one and only Tony Stark becoming a hero to the people. All the donations and support he offered for the people affected by tragedies. The sheer amount of people who still had their lives because he was the one there to protect them. In particular, you thought about Peter and Harley. Your dad helped them before you met them. Because of him, you got to befriend two of the brightest minds to grace the world.

"And you seemed so happy." You added. "You scored a family, you finally got with Pepper, you founded a better world..."

You remembered wandering the city streets and coming across the entire team once. They were hanging around just as normal friends did, laughing and teasing each other without a care in the world. While you had been so happy for them, you couldn't keep away the envy either. It was like some kind of cruel irony, the universe letting you get so close and yet so far. There were so many times you could have just reached out and called his name.

"I stayed the same." You whispered, closing your eyes for a second. "I was still a coward, the scared little brat that thought running was the only way to fix things. But even with that, I still don't regret a thing. I lived my life my own way and that's all that matters. I don't care how short it was."

Tony listened to every word, simply letting you express everything. He had spent your entire life thinking you despised him just as he hated his own father, only to just now be corrected. While you insisted your life wasn't wasted, he couldn't help thinking that his was.

"My mission was dangerous." You said. "I knew I had to infiltrate a compromised agency and retrieve a dangerous artifact, but I did it anyway. I knew it would end badly if I messed up, but I accepted it. I didn't know if it was the right thing to do, but it got me here."

He finally looked up, his expression almost heartbroken. "What do you mean? The right thing?"

"Yeah." You shrugged, but regretted it when a sudden wave of pain washed over you. You tried not to react. "For years I put it off because I didn't know if you wanted me back. I didn't know if I was worthy of being your kid. I didn't know if you even wanted me at all, that you probably regretted me being born in the first place."

You remembered pulling your hand away every time you saw him because you simply didn't want to ruin his newfound happiness. You had convinced yourself you were both better off apart. After all, you had the Parkers as family. You had Coulson and his team as friends. You had your own happiness.

"I don't regret anything." Tony said, bringing you back to the present. "I've made so many mistakes it would take all the resources in the world to list them, but you aren't one of them. You never were. (Y/n), you're my... You're my greatest creation. You've saved me."

You had to wait a moment as the words processed. Involuntary tears began to well in your eyes as it set in that he truly loved you after all.

"I kept it, you know." He added.

"Kept what?" You asked quietly.

"The necklace."

You watched as he used the hand that wasn't holding yours to move the collar of his shirt to the side. You saw the chain around his neck and felt a strange warmth deep in your heart.

"I won't take it off. I... I can't." He confessed. "I thought you might come back for it. It kept you close. And it confused Loki the Great Horned One."

You tilted your head curiously. "It what?"

"Yeah, he had a few performance issues. Or maybe it was just an off day. Either way, I'm glad I had it."

Your tears began to fall. You felt too emotionally and physically weak to stop them. In fact, you felt tired. Some sleep would be nice.

Seeing you cry made Tony hate the circumstances even more as he carefully cupped your cheek.

"You've always been with me."

He smiled and kissed the top of your head softly.

"I'm sorry for not being there. I didn't get to see the important bits, to watch you become... You. You were as beautiful as your mother but I thought you'd just end up like me. I didn't want that for any kid."

Your tears were coming faster. Partly because you were so sad and happy at the same time, but also because you were starting to feel weaker.

Something was wrong. You didn't have long left.

You could feel your limbs aching, the urge to relax, your eyelids fighting the choice to remain open. Your body was done.

Using all the strength you had left, you gripped his shirt. You were scared.

"I need you, Dad." You said. "I need you safe and well and happy. I need you to be okay because that's the only thing that's gonna keep me from going crazy right now."

"Don't worry about me, sweetheart." He said. "Just stay with me, alright? Keep looking at me. You're safe, and you're gonna be fine. I've got you now, and I'm not letting go. I'm always going to protect you. You're my life."

"Promise me. Promise that when I'm gone you won't be sad... That you won't push Pepper away or leave the Avengers... That you'll live. I need you to do that for me. Don't waste your life because mine ended. It's too precious."

The words hit him like a brick, and suddenly he was back in Afghanistan with Yinsen telling him the same thing. He was overwhelmed with the sudden emotion and embraced you tightly, hoping that as long as he could hold you, you couldn't slip away.

"I will." He promised. "I will, babygirl."

Although you didn't want to, you had to let go.

"Dad?" You whispered.

"Y-Yeah?"

"I... Love you... 3000."

The words froze him in place.

When you were a kid, you didn't understand why he wasn't there all the time and you had to come up with numbers to try and emphasize how much you missed him.

All Tony could do was watch helplessly as your grip loosened and your eyes slowly shut. He wanted to beg you to come back but his throat had turned to sandpaper.

And then the flatline filled the room.

"N-No..." He shook his head, pulling you close again. "No!"

He cried and sobbed and rocked back and forth with your body cradled against his.

It was over. All of it.

You were gone.

#Tony stark #ironman #tony stark x daughter!reader #tony stark & daughter! reader #dr. cho #bruce bannner #hulk #mcu #mcuship #marvel #avengers

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marvelstarker-mha98 · 6 months

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The Runaway Distance Life Of A Little Stark chapter 26: Coping Mechanisms

Pairing: Tony Stark & daughter!Reader, Tony stark x Pepper Potts & Reader, Happy Hogan, Tony Stark & Reader, Rhodey, tony stark & Reader, Bruce banner, reader & tony stark, Dr. cho, Tony Stark & reader, Sam Wilson & Steve rogers, Clint barton x Laura Barton & his kids, Natasha romanoff, Tony x Madeline (past), Tony Stark, Obadiah Stane (past) & Reader Summary: How Tony copes with his daughter's eader's death Warning: Death, Dreams and past Co author with: callikc Tag: @venomsvl @geeksareunique The recovery room was haunting.

The ambience was uncomfortable, the lights on and yet too dark, the flatline of the machine shattering the silence. But it wasn't the only thing.

The room was filled with Tony's sobs as he cradled your lifeless body. It was the worst anyone had ever seen him, pleading for you to wake up. It wasn't fair that he had so much time with you during your childhood and yet he barely knew anything. He didn't even know your favorite color or your favorite foods, he didn't know a single thing.

People say that losing someone you love when you know everything about them is the worst thing, but really it was losing someone when you knew nothing. It filled a person with regret and guilt and left them wishing they could do anything to bring someone back.

Tony would've traded his life in a second to swap places. He'd accept his redeemer even if it meant he'd only see your face for one more second. It wasn't fair.

"Please, babygirl." He whispered, rocking back and forth. "Come on, you don't deserve this. Wake up."

Dr. Cho and the others had come in by that time, their faces racked with sorrow and sadness at the scene before them.

"You're strong. You're strong, (Y/n), you're gonna make it."

Pepper was at Tony's side in an instant, her cheeks wet with tears as she hugged him from the side, trying to offer what comfort she could.

"No." His voice was breaking as he cried harder. "No. No, come on. Come back, sweetheart."

Rhodey joined them also, his eyes shut tight so he wouldn't have to see your body.

"S-She's gone." Tony mumbled, trembling.

"I know." Pepper said, kissing the top of his head. "I know..."

He looked up at her, utterly heartbroken. "What do I do? I-I don't know what to do."

Dr. Cho came forward, her movements hesitant. "Let me take her. I'll look after her."

It took him a while to process what she was saying but with reassurance from Pepper he very reluctantly laid your body back on the bed. Dr. Cho offered a gentle and sad smile as she carefully reached for the blanket, pulling it over your face and hiding the body from view.

Even that simple action was too much for him and he turned back to Pepper and Rhodey, crying in their arms once again. Happy watched with a vexing emotion of moral culpability hanging over him as Bruce bowed his head in respect.

Clint had been watching everything from behind the room's window and turned away after finding himself saddened. Whether it was seeing his friends hurting, the loss of you, or just the general aura of the moment getting to him, he couldn't wait there much longer.

He walked to the end of the corridor and thought for a moment before taking out his phone. He sent a quick message to Fury about what had happened before going to his other contacts until he found a familiar name.

He pressed the call button and waited for a moment until the line picked up.

"Hey, babe." Laura's sweet voice answered.

Clint relaxed significantly after hearing her voice. "Hey."

"What's up? Everything okay?"

There was a slight crack in his voice as he replied. "Yeah, I'm good. How are you? How are the kids?"

"They're doing great, they miss you, though."

"I know. I'll try to visit again soon. Work's just... Busy."

There was a pause and he could practically see her frowning on the other side of the phone.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

Clint looked down at his feet and wasn't really sure about how to answer. It was strange how you hadn't spent much time together and yet he felt like he'd known you for ages.

"We lost someone today." He admitted. "She was special to a friend of mine. Meant a lot to him."

"Oh, honey, I'm so sorry." Laura said with genuine remorse. "Did you know her well?"

"A little. She was exactly like him so it was easy to just talk, you know?"

"Yeah. When did it happen?"

"Today, it... It was expected, but... But still sudden."

Just then he heard the sounds of his kids. It sounded like they were arguing over something because he heard Lila claiming that something Cooper took was hers.

"Hey, can I talk to the kids?" He asked softly. "It'll be nice to hear them."

"Of course." Laura said. "Hold on."

She called for Lila and Cooper and after a brief rustling sound, he heard their voices.

"Dad, are you there?"

"Daddy!"

Already Clint was smiling again. "Hey, trouble."

"We miss you." Lila said. "When are you coming home?"

"Soon, I promise. It's just been a rough couple of days."

"Can we make it better?"

"I'm sure you can, kiddo. Tell me what's been going on."

"You'll never guess what happened at school." Cooper said. "It started when that quiet kid at the back of French finally snapped."

Clint chuckled. "Go on. What happened?"

Two days had passed since the big fiasco in New York and DC.

Sam Wilson was sitting in Steve's hospital room, still waiting for him to wake up. He was making a good recovery thanks to the whole super soldier thing but it didn't make the days any easier.

Sam was dozing off now as the Trouble Man soundtrack played from his phone. He was exhausted and hadn't really eaten much due to the anxiety of everything.

"On your left."

He woke with a light startle, turning his head to see that Steve was finally awake.

"Sleeping Beauty rises." He teased, relieved.

Steve managed a laugh and they shared a smile.

"What happened?" He asked.

Sam shrugged lightly. "A lot."

"Got any specifics?"

"Well, you've been out two days. It's mostly just the cleanups."

The final events started coming back to Steve in flashes.

"Where's Bucky?" He asked eagerly.

Sam looked away for a moment. "He disappeared. When we found you at the Potomac there was no sign of him. He saved your life, though."

Steve nodded but he was also disappointed. To be so close to his best friend after all these years only to have him taken away was worse than any of the injuries he was currently suffering from. He was hopeful, on the other hand, because Bucky had saved his life. It meant that even though he was a slave to HYDRA, he held some semblance of the past.

"What happened to SHIELD?" He then asked. "Fury? Nat?"

"They're okay. They're hiding." Sam reassured him. "As for SHIELD? It's messy. We lost a lot of good people. Too many of them. The Triskelion is a bunch of rubble and they're still searching."

"The Triskelion." He remembered what happened after he revealed the truth. "What... What happened to Ellen? (Y/n)? Did she get the scepter out?"

"That's an even longer story." Sam joked.

Steve shrugged. "I'm not going anywhere."

"Good point." He thought about how best to describe the events before continuing to explain. "I talked to her before the building collapsed, she said she was going to find Stark, and disappeared in this fancy ass car."

He trailed off and Steve noticed that he looked conflicted. "Did she do it?"

"Sort of. She got to New York, saw Stark again, but there was some kind of shooting. They haven't released much, but (Y/n) didn't make it. It was fatal. She died the same day. The scepter is missing as far as I know."

Steve didn't say anything, trying to understand in silence. He had no idea what those who knew the real you were feeling but he did know it was in no way easy to deal with these things.

"How's Tony handling it?" He asked quietly.

Sam shook his head. "It's not good."

Another two days passed.

Natasha had volunteered herself to explain the course of events that had unfolded at the Triskelion. She was doing so in front of the senate committee, their judging selves and poisoned views desperate to find a way to incriminate anyone but themselves.

"Why haven't we yet heard from Captain Rogers?" One of the committee asked.

Natasha, her arms crossed, shrugged lightly. "I don't know what there is left for him to say. I think the wreck in the middle of the Potomac made his point fairly eloquently."

"Well, he could explain how this country is expected to maintain its national security now that he and you have laid waste to our intelligence apparatus."

"HYDRA was selling you lies, not intelligence."

"Many of which you seemed to have had a personal hand in telling. And there are other concerns."

"Such as?"

"The fiasco that occurred in New York City mere hours after the Triskelion fell. The shooting involving the Starks."

Her jaw clenched. "I fail to see what concern that is of yours."

"The damage was exponential, Agent Romanoff. We want to know if Tony Stark, your fellow Avenger, will be paying for it since it occurred at his tower. Furthermore, we haven't heard from him either."

"Mr. Stark is not available at this moment because he's mourning the loss of his daughter."

"I still don't-"

"He needs time." She told them defiantly. "Do you have children?"

The committee member who had done all the speaking so far finally shut up, sharing a glance with the rest of the men.

Eventually, he spoke up again. "I have a son, yes."

Natasha nodded. "Now imagine if you lost your son. Don't you think you would want some time to grieve before being forced to explain every little detail to the press despite it being no concern of theirs?" Another member of the committee leaned forward. "Agent, you should know that there are some on this committee who feel, given your service record, both for this country and against it, that you belong in a penitentiary. Not mouthing off on Capitol Hill." She remained emotionless as she replied.

"You're not going to put me in a prison." She stated. "You're not going to put any of us in a prison. You know why?"

"Do enlighten us." The first member chimed in again.

"Because you need us. Yes, the world is a vulnerable place, and yes, we help make it that way. But we're also the ones best qualified to defend it. So, if you want to arrest me, arrest me. You'll know where to find me."

After basically telling the government to kiss her ass, Natasha rose from her seat and left the room. The overlapping questions and camera flashes from the reporters followed her all the way to the exit.

Although she wasn't exactly Tony's best friend, she couldn't help but hope he was okay.

That same day, back in New York, Tony was still in the recovery room you had died in.

He hadn't moved, barely ate or drank, and hadn't been able to say a word since they took you away. His eyes were red from the tears he had spared for your loss and it was only with the help of a minor sedative that he managed to get any sleep at all.

Pepper had stayed with him every day and every night, coaxing him into eating and drinking so he wouldn't waste away into nothing. She was trying to let herself mourn you quietly so she could be there for Tony instead. She couldn't even begin to imagine the pain he was feeling.

Tony himself was pretty much still passed out from the effects of the sedative. He needed it after an outburst when the funeral director arrived.

The funeral director organizing your last rites was a close friend of Stark Industries.

That same day they had taken your body to clean you up and keep your body in a visibly comforting state while the funeral preparations were to be made.

Tony wasn't himself, acting out of character as the angry stage of grief took its toll on his mind.

"What if they hurt her?" He was asking, his head running wild with irrational possibilities. "What if they don't take care of her properly? What if they're the same ones who wanted her dead? What if I never see her again?"

"Tony-" Rhodey interrupted, holding him steady. "Hey, man, they're not gonna hurt her, okay?"

"But we don't know them!"

"Yes, we do. Pepper called them, remember? She knows what she's doing."

"They aren't the bad guys." Happy said. "They're just going to clean her up, alright? They're here to keep her safe while we... While we make arrangements."

"No!" Tony continued to argue, ready to march over and take you back.

Pepper stepped in front of him and took his hands in her own before he could do something he regretted.

"Tony, look at me." She begged. "Please, come on."

He stared at the small group wheeling your covered body away and closed his eyes tightly when he couldn't bear it any more.

"You're angry, I know." Pepper said softly. "But you haven't slept in days. And you're still injured. You need a break. She's gone and we need to-"

"She's not gone!" He snapped, vision slowly getting more blurry as tears built up yet again. "She's... She's not. Okay? She's just... She's okay! But we can't let them hurt her! What if I never see her again, Pep?! What if they-"

While he went on another tangent about all the negative possibilities, Rhodey looked over his shoulder and reluctantly nodded to Dr. Cho. Tony didn't know what was happening until he felt a slight prick at his neck.

Dr. Cho pulled back the needle, apologizing quietly as Tony stumbled backwards and felt a drowsiness overtake him. Happy, Rhodey, and Bruce worked together to keep him upright as he almost collapsed again.

Pepper looked at Dr. Cho, confused and surprised. "What's that?"

"Lorazepam and some others." Dr. Cho answered, placing the needle in the sink. "It's a healthy dose."

"It's not dangerous." Bruce quickly added, seeing the look of horror on Pepper's features. "It's a benzodiazepine, used most frequently for anxiety, insomnia, and severe agitation."

"It'll take effect over the next few hours, give Tony time to heal."

As Rhodey and Happy half-walked and half-carried Tony to the empty bed, Pepper watched with torn feelings. She knew it was best in the end, but it didn't mean she had to like it.

Back in the present, Tony was whimpering your name in his sleep.

Pepper held his hand and rubbed soothing shapes on the back in an attempt to keep him calm. It wasn't much, but it was the best she could do at that time.

"Oh, Tony..." She whispered, kissing the top of his head.

Happy stood in the corner of the room as his regrets kept leaving him in doubt. He was still stuck in the mindset that if he had just told someone the truth about you, he could have somehow prevented all of this and saved your life. Perhaps part of him knew that the outcome was inevitable, but he didn't want to believe it.

Rhodey walked in soon enough with a guilty look on his face. "Hey."

Pepper looked over. "Hi. Is everything okay?"

He nodded, although it seemed to pain him emotionally. "I have to go. They want me in Washington for a conference. I wish I could stay, but-"

"No, it's okay. I understand. Do what you have to."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. We'll be alright."

"Okay." He glanced at Tony for a moment. "I'll be back for the funeral. Just let me know."

Pepper nodded that time. "Of course."

"Keep me updated on him. He's not gonna be the same. He hasn't been like this since his parents' accident."

If Rhodey had the option to stay without receiving severe backlash for it, he would have done so with no hesitation. Unfortunately, his superiors weren't the most lenient kind of people. He wanted to do more.

"It's worse." Pepper admitted, looking back at Tony. "Bruce said the Lorazepam will help keep him calm but I don't know."

Tony was dreaming.

While some dream the most brilliant and confusing and random of things, he was stuck in flashbacks, reliving twisted versions of memories he had. One such dream was when he held you for the first time.

Unlike you had been led to believe, Tony's relationship with your mother wasn't just a one night stand of drunken improv. They had known each other for years, and had been friends with benefits the entire time.

Madeline was her name, and she was absolutely gorgeous in Tony's eyes. Her eyes were electric in color and her hair perfectly styled even as she lay in the hospital bed, weak and defeated. He was, however, unaware that his close friend - Obadiah Stane - vehemently opposed the relationship between him and Madeline. In fact, Stane had even gone as far as to threaten to destroy Madeline's life if she didn't give up the baby because it would simply ruin Tony's image.

But Madeline would never. She loved Tony, and she loved her baby even more. As she watched Tony stare at you in awe, she couldn't help smiling too.

She knew she didn't have long left. There was a hemorrhage after the delivery and she had lost too much blood. She didn't know how long, but she knew it wasn't enough to say all she wanted to say.

"She's beautiful." She said.

Tony couldn't look away from you, laughing to himself as you tried to grab his entire hand with your tiny little fist.

"She's perfect." He said.

Madeline struggled to raise her arm enough to brush down some of your hair which was already as messy as your dad's.

"She'll do great things." She said. "She is going to be amazing, especially with a dad as awesome as you."

Tony, who also knew that they didn't have long together, struggled to meet her eyes. "You're the awesome one, Mads."

"No... It's all you." Madeline confessed, looking down. "I want you to raise her right. Keep her safe and love her as much as you love yourself. And give her this."

She struggled to remove a necklace that hung over her chest. When she finally managed it, she placed it in the hand that wasn't holding your head.

"This has been in my family for years. Centuries, even. It's an old thing, but it's as much hers as it is mine. As soon as she's old enough, let her wear it."

"I promise." He said.

Tony was filled with regret and guilt as he watched the scene play out in his mind. He hadn't thought about Madeline in over a decade. In fact, the ever more frequent one night stands were his coping mechanism in getting over her loss. He had never fulfilled the promise he made to her that day and it haunted him now, like a swift vengeance or karma.

The next dream/memory he found himself watching all over again was about five years later.

He was discussing a new weapon with Stane when all of a sudden a tiny girl - you - had burst through the doors with a big, stupid grin on your face.

"Daddy!" You exclaimed, clutching a stuffed bear close to your chest. "Can we play?"

Stane looked less than amused and Tony pinched the bridge of his nose, annoyed.

"Happy!" He called.

He waited until his bodyguard ran into the room with a bright red face. He was breathless, scanning the room for a possible threat until suddenly his eyes landed on you. You just smiled innocently and giggled at the state of him.

"Get her out." Tony ordered.

"But Da-" You said with a frown.

"Now, Happy."

"Yes, sir." Happy nodded, scooping you up into his arms. "Come on, rascal."

"Keep her on a leash or something." Tony added. "I'll be out in five."

"I only wanted to play." You mumbled, tearing up in confusion.

"It's okay, kid." Happy said as he carried you into the hallway. "He's a little busy, but your dad can play later."

"Promise?"

"Pinky. And afterwards we can get you ice cream. How does that sound?"

Your eyes lit up again and you nodded feverishly, hugging him. "Yes!"

The modern Tony watched painfully as a few minutes later his younger self came out and started yelling at you for interrupting. He said his meetings were more important than a child's play time. He was wrong. He should've known that every second with you was the most precious of his life.

He should have known that back then he was just doing what his own father did to him. He should have known how it made a child feel, how it hurt them. He also hated how much Stane was involved in your lives. If he had known back then what the bastard would go on to do, he probably would have killed him years early.

Another dream.

A few years later.

You were about thirteen or fourteen now, and eagerly going on about your latest collection of A+ scores. Tony back then hadn't been at all interested, far more focused on working away in his lab than listening to you talk about school.

"I'm busy, (Y/n)." He stated, not even bothering to look up. "Tell me later."

Your smile had dropped. "But you always say that."

"And you always fail to listen."

"Because later never comes."

"Life is full of disappointments, kid."

And that was it on the matter.

You looked down at the brilliant test scores and noticed your hand shaking in anger and annoyance. You worked hard to try and give him something to be proud of but it was for nothing. He didn't care.

Present Tony hated himself as he watched the anger in your eyes be replaced with hurt. He was proud, he always had been, but he was too stupid to show it. Would it have killed him to just once say it aloud for you?

The next memory was even more painful.

The day he left for Afghanistan.

"Shouldn't you say goodbye to (Y/n)?" Pepper asked.

"Just tell her I'll be back eventually." He had said in response.

That hurt like a punch to the gut. Why didn't he say goodbye?

"Tony, she's your daughter."

"I'm aware."

"Don't you think-"

"Trust me, she knows how to look after herself. She'll survive a day or two alone."

Tony watched his past self leave and slam the door. The only difference to this point of view was that he could see your sixteen-year-old self hiding behind the wall upstairs.

You had heard it all.

The next moment threw Tony off completely.

It wasn't his memory, but one of your own. He watched you march into Stark Industries, the perfect embodiment of poise and determination, and threaten your way past security guards. He couldn't help laughing as you waltzed on past them and into one of the offices.

Stane's office.

The smile dropped from his face as he watched the scene unfold. He had no idea you were so worried. He didn't realize that even after years of resentment, you cared enough to try and find out if he was okay even back then. It made it all the more painful as he watched Stane snap and threaten you.

"No!" He yelled.

His voice sounded like nothing but an echo as he ran forward to intervene, only to hit an invisible wall or window that blocked him.

"And who's going to believe you?" Obadiah growled as he pinned you against the wall. "It's the word of Tony's mistake against his best friend. Who do you think the media will flock to?"

"Don't listen to him!" Tony begged, hitting the invisible window with all the strength he could muster. "(Y/n)!"

"You can't do this!" You yelled, oblivious to the shouts.

Obadiah tightened his grip. "If you tell anyone about this, I'll kill you. If you don't do what I say, I'll sell you off. You won't be able to walk out of these doors fast enough to save your life."

"Get your damn hands off of her!" Tony warned, only for his warnings to fall on deaf ears.

"You can't do this." You gasped out when Obadiah finally let you go.

Obadiah looked down at you, not a hint of sympathy in his voice. "You won't tell anyone. You won't go to the police, or Ms. Potts. Or Rhodes. You will shut up and go home or I will find a way to get rid of you."

"No!" Tony repeated, hitting harder. "No, (Y/n)! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!"

He watched helplessly as you turned tail and ran through the office door in tears. He tried calling your name and then threatening Obadiah again but he was merely a spectator, his words and actions meaningless.

He slid against the invisible barrier until he was on the floor, regretting pretty much every life choice he ever made.

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