Thank you for the ride.
Recently I have been thinking about terminating this blog a lot. Then I am reminded by how much love I receive from all you followers, and all the friends I have made through the site in the past three years, and I am reluctant to do so. But updating has become a chore, and the glitch of my masterlist a few days ago felt so much like a sign that maybe the time has come for me to give up on this blog.
It’s not that I don’t have the time to run it, because most of my posts are on queue anyway. It’s just that I am entering a different phase of life soon, with university coming up in the second half of the year, and there are certain creative projects that are consuming a lot of my attention and inspiration that I used to dedicate into the blog.
I am not going to disappear completely yet; I will continue posting whatever remaining drafts that I have, and when they’re gone, I just won’t be creating any more new content. I will definitely continue supporting BTS, EXO, Super Junior… all these kpop groups, in other ways. I am not sure if I will be deleting the entire blog completely when it is over, but as long as I am uncertain, the site will remain as it is.
So thank you, for accompanying me on this blogging journey for the past 3 years, for sharing my love for kpop, and for all the sweet messages you have sent. If you would like to reach me following the termination of this blog, I am keeping my inbox open: [email protected]
, so please feel free to drop me an e-mail anytime.
Take care, and farewell.
- For the last time, Paper Soldier
You don’t know what possessed you to follow your gossip girl friends to the archery range, but you certainly know that they were there not to chit-chat, but to stare at a particularly handsome senior who had somehow already managed to catch the eye of half of the female freshmen population. You have to admit that he is pretty good-looking, especially when he stares down the shaft of the arrow with his eyes all squinty with focus and professionalism. Unfortunately, his cute baby face does little to offset his lack of talent in the game, as he lets his arrow fly and miss. He lets out a sheepish, embarrassed smile that makes him look more like a boyish junior than a graceful senior, and in that one moment you finally understand what otherworldly charm he possesses to make girls fall at his feet.
Jungkook as an Older Brother
Once when you were younger, you were play-fighting with pillows and he freaking knocked you off the bed so hard you got sent to the hospital and had to get stitches and lived with a bloody headache for the next few days.
You hated going to school because all your female friends would be drooling over him in front of him, and you’re like, “Excuse me? He’s my brother?”
You seriously never understood what all those girls saw in him.
He was always so shy like he had never spoken to any girls before.
He never treated you like a girl anyway.
Never mind how he always got truckloads of presents during Valentine’s Day (though it was actually pretty good how he never ate any of the chocolate so they all came to you eventually).
It was competitive every single day.
Comparing your grades. Comparing your progress at Taekwando. Comparing who had grown more over the holidays.
You thought you hated him until he left for the dorms. And then you missed him so much every day it hurt.
When he came back to visit, occasionally you would climb into his bed in the middle of the night just like the old times just so you could feel safe.
He would tell you about life in the city and maybe sing some songs to you.
But mostly he would just sit back and listen to you talk about your mundane life, acting like everything was interesting.
When you got old enough to visit his dorm he was so protective of you as though his members were sharks threatening to eat you.
Nowadays you go over all the time just so you can annoy him.
You pretend to like Taehyung more just to see him squirm.
He brings you out on “coffee dates” occasionally just so that you can catch up.
Even when he’s overseas or busy you’ll always get a present from him on special occasions like your birthday or christmas by hook or by crook.
Long distance phone calls.
He buys back strange gifts for you from overseas.
So many freaking girls in your office trying to get his phone number from you.
You reject them all the time and pretend you don’t know him.
But to be honest you’re so freaking proud of him.
Like, you have posters of his group covering every single inch of your bedroom wall.
You wish he could live with you and your parents instead, because every time you see him again he has grown so much?
He got all the muscular genes because no matter how hard you gym with him, you’re still kind of flabby.
Once, he got a one-week break from his company and you went traveling to some lost corner of Korea that he had suggested.
He freaking caught a fish with his bare hands.
You were pretty sure the fish was already dead and floating about in the shallow waters waiting for him to pick up.
But he was so proud you couldn’t say “no” to him and ended up grilling the strange fish for dinner.
Both of you got a stomachache after that.
He insisted it wasn’t his fault.
But when you get back to the city he buys you your favorite bingsoo anyway to make it up to you.
And brings you to meet EXO.
You hate him sometimes, but really you never want another guy as your brother.
Taehyung has always been a particularly active child, but more so during the summer. It seems like his energy level has a close association with the temperature outside: the hotter it is, the more troublesome he is. That’s why on summer mornings, it is not uncommon for you to be woken up by him before your alarm goes off. His strange antics include staring at you with his watery puppy-eyes as you sleep, and jumping around your bedroom wildly while shrieking incoherently at the top of his voice. Once, he even tried to pour a tub of ice water on you “just for fun”, which, of course, got him into so much trouble that he hasn’t tried it again since then. After you wake up begrudgingly, sending him daggers with your eyes, you would move to the bathroom to wash up and get changed. And every single time you emerge from the smaller, side-room, you never fail to find Taehyung lying on your bed, cheekily making cute expressions at you that prompt your desires to throw a pillow in his direction.
Being EXO’s manager isn’t easy: the nine young men are like hyperactive bunnies with a limitless supply of energy to expend, and it’s all you can do to keep your eye on all of them at any one point in time to make sure that they aren’t getting into any trouble. Not to say you didn’t like your job; the hectic work hours might had gotten to you at the beginning, but over time you began to enjoy yourself, especially after learning about the quirks of these seemingly perfect idols behind the scenes. For instance, you had grown to know Suho as a gentleman with a deep sense of responsibility and duty towards his group. Beyond D.O.’s quietness was the desire to forge sincere and genuine human connections with the people around him. Baekhyun might seem to be careless and light-hearted most of the time, but you had also had the opportunity to see a more serious side of him, one that spoke of tragedy from experience. You began to work for them, because you wanted to help them more than anything else. And what gave you the greatest sense of satisfaction was when all nine of them finally fell asleep, be it backstage or in the car back to the entertainment company. Because that was when their faces were, at last, at peace, and the quietness gave you some time to yourself to reevaluate your relationships with these diverse personalities.
The first time you return those precious three words, “I love you”, to Taehyung, he squeals excitedly, mouth widening into his trademark boxy smile as he presses his palms to his face, as though he was hiding crimson blush on his cheeks. The child-like, over-enthusiastic action causes you to smile, too, unconsciously, as his deep laugh reverberates through the air in between the both of you. “Say that again, jagi~”, he begs, as though those mere three words were music to his ears. By then you’re too shy to say anything else, much less repeat what you had just said. But he starts doing aegyo at you, so much so that you have to give in to his request. And when you do he does that eager squeal again, saying, “My jagi loves me!”
Tiny BTS - Rap Monster
Summary: You bring tiny Rap Monster a flower as a present, to disastrous consequences.
Sitting down at your study table, you hum to a tiny Namjoon sitting on your pencil case. “Guess what I got you today?”
“I don’t know,” Namjoon replies. “But I’m sure it’ll good as long as it isn’t another piece of chocolate,” he adds, referring to the last time when you let him have a huge chunk of a chocolate bar. He had gotten high off the supremely high amounts of sugar relative to his size, resulting in his self-embarrassment and your second-hand embarrassment.
You laugh. “No, it’s not chocolate. I got you this!” You present to him a tiny stalk of flower that is really slightly bigger than the size of his head, but has bright yellow petals and a sweet scent you are sure he will appreciate.
“Oh (Y/N),” Namjoon gushes, hugging the stalk in his tiny hands, “thank you!”
He takes in a deep breath, and then suddenly his small face freezes in the most comical fashion. It takes three seconds for him to finally sneeze, and it’s such a big one that it sends the flower petals flying off the stalk and spraying you with wet and slimy droplets.
“OH MY GOD! KIM NAMJOON!” you shriek as you wiped your hands quickly.
“Sorry,” he mumbles abashedly, sulking at you as a flower petal lands softly on his head.