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universalfanfic · 3 years

Note

Regency AU - Either Person A or Person B is in danger of being ruined socially: for Stutton? it give me Stutton vibes

This may be a Part One? Depending on if I ever manage to get caught up on asks. So... Please enjoy this snippet and its “cliffhanger ending”.

“Mother, I refuse.”

Sutton clenched her hands at her sides and pursed her lips. Her mother’s expression didn’t waver, she could be just as stubborn and Sutton felt a trickle of unease at the steel in her mother’s eyes.

“We have no choice.” Her mother said. “I’ve already arranged for you to be introduced to Captain Rogers at the next ball.”

“You cannot just marry me off against my will! I’ll refuse him.”

“Oh? Refuse him and be left destitute?”

Sutton scoffed and looked away, but her mother marched forward, her skirts swirling around her feet.

“Don’t scoff at me. You know Howard’s firm has been in decline recently. And beyond that, what he has legally must go to Tyrese.”

“Tyrese would not leave me destitute.”

Her mother took a breath.

“No. But you would leave his allowance smaller than it already is and with slimmer chances of a good match. Would you do that to your brother when you have another option available to you?”

Sutton hissed under her breath. Using Tyrese wasn’t fair. She would disgrace herself in public for him and her mother knew that.

“Why would Captain Rogers agree to this match?” She asked instead. “His family is of good fortune last I heard.”

“And your head is in the clouds far too often to hear the local gossip. Captain Rogers cut Captain Rumlow in town, right in front of everyone. His social standing is in question and he could use our family’s name to salvage his own.”

Sutton, indeed, had not heard the gossip. She rolled her eyes.

“Over ignoring him in public? Please, mother. A man of his wealth only has to announce an apology and his name will survive-”

“Captain Rogers refuses.”

The statement lingered. That was a bit more severe.

“Oh.” Said Sutton.

“His reasons are his own, but he is a man that stands by his convictions.” Her mother paused, a soft, pleading look took over her face. “By all rights, he is a good man, Sutton. Please. I am thinking only of your future.”

---

Sutton found herself, coiffed and pristine, at the ball. Her nerves were alight and she wanted to hide in a far room, but of course she couldn’t. And she couldn’t look as frazzled and nervous as she felt either. Lest she also give herself a poor reputation and ruin Captain Rogers’ only reason to marry her.

Which she still didn’t want to agree to.

Her mother arranged Sutton’s curls herself with a few decorative pins and the reminder that Sutton should be concerned for her own future. And of how sincerely wonderful a match Captain Rogers would be.

Captain Rogers was newly stationed in town, though his family’s name was well known. It seemed like the locals hadn’t stopped chittering about him and his fellows since their arrival. Though in Captain Rogers’ case, now the talk was for a different, less admirable, reason.

If Sutton weren’t so distressed, she might have been impressed with how quickly her mother was able to negotiate the arrangement.

The dancing hall was full of people and lively music. Mr. Stark was hosting, yet again, and his parties were always an event. Sutton would have been more eager for a few dances if a looming marriage arrangement didn’t shadow the entire evening.

“You mustn't look so glum, Sutton. You’ll put off all the eager gentlemen looking for a dancing partner.”

Sutton turned at the voice and put on a smile.

“Glum? At a Stark party? Hardly.”

Natasha, her dear friend, smiled as she took Sutton’s hand.

“And yet you’ve been scowling at the crowd for the last few minutes. Tell me; did Victoria drive her carriage by your house with a new, fancy bonnet?”

Sutton laughed lightly at that. As much as was socially acceptable.

“No. Though I wish it were something so trivial.”

“Oh, I sense delectable gossip. Now you must share.”

No one in the room was paying particular attention to them yet, and no one approached to make introductions. Sutton dipped her head closer to Natasha’s in order not to be overheard.

“I hardly want to even say.”

“Sutton, I insist. You’re hardly ever in poor spirits and you’ll make me worry.”

“Can you keep a secret?”

“My dear sister-in-arms, you know that I am full of secrets.”

That, of course, was an understatement. If there was one person who kept tabs on all the local gossip, and some beyond, it was Natasha Barton. Sutton was too afraid to ask how she found out so much.

“My mother,” Sutton whispered, “is planning to have me...to have me wed to Captain Rogers.”

Natasha cocked a brow, looking rather more conspiratorial than sympathetic. Sutton frowned.

“That certainly would salvage his social standing.” Natasha said.

“Not you too. Really; does no one care that I would rather marry for love than for station or fortune?”

“Do you think you couldn’t love a man like Captain Rogers?”

“I do not know him, so I could not say.”

Natasha flippantly waved off Sutton’s argument as if it were no important matter.

“That’s what the courtship is for.”

“Ugh, never mind I said a thing, then. You’re just as impossible as my mother.”

“I shall take that as a compliment.”

Sutton was kept from returning a snide remark by two approaching figures. One familiar and the other a stranger. Both women smiled politely as the two men stopped before them.

“Mrs. Barton, Miss Regan.”

“Mr. Stark.” Both women said in unison.

They dipped slightly in greeting and Anthony Stark bowed at the waist.

Anthony Stark was not only the host, but a friend of the family. Sutton was quite fond of him, generally, despite his shortcomings. But her opinion of him could be swayed depending on who he was about to introduce.

“Might I introduce Captain Rogers,” Mr. Stark said. “He’s recently arrived with his company and will be staying in town for the foreseeable future.”

Sutton’s mouth went dry and her heart thudded. Mr. Stark dropped a few notches in her list of esteemed peoples.

Captain Rogers was a tall man with well kept blond hair and a defined jaw. He held himself in a stiff, business-like manner, and he offered them a polite enough smile, though Sutton felt it was a bit forced.

She and Natasha dipped as he bowed, and Natasha cast her a knowing look from the corner of her eye. Sutton knew the look. It said Natasha thought that Sutton would be impressed or should be forced to admit that she was. And true, Captain Rogers appeared to be the sort of gentleman that would attract all of the local ladies gossip, but for how much would that account in terms of personality? A handsome man did not necessarily mean he was genteel underneath and away from the public eye.

“A pleasure to meet you, Captain Rogers.” Natasha said. “Your service to this country puts us in your debt.”

“Hardly.” Captain Rogers said. “It’s a duty and an honor to serve.”

“Admirable, Captain.” Natasha smiled, disarmingly friendly. “And, pray tell, do you have an estate here? Or are you boarding with friends for your duration?”

Steve dipped his head.

“My family has an estate in Brooklyn,” he said. “It’s of enough size that I hope to be able to host dinners for some of the men without family in the area.”

“So generous of you, Captain.”

Sutton’s tone was neutral, she had the practice, and she kept her expression just as neutral as all eyes turned towards her. Mr. Stark had a shine in his own eyes and a curl of his lip that said he was amused. Likely he knew of her mother’s schemes already. Likely he was the very one her mother had conspired with to introduce her to Captain Rogers in the first place. And if that were the case he knew her enough to guess that she was less than enthused.

Captain Rogers tilted his head in a gesture that said he knew her comment meant more but would graciously ignore it.

“It’s not my aim to draw attention to myself. I simply wish to bolster morale where I can. I know just as well the struggles of being a solitary man in a foreign place.”

They studied each other with equal scrutiny. Sutton was sure he found her at least slightly unpleasant, seeming to toe around the edge of decency. But then, he didn’t have much room for judging her on that account, did he?

On her end, she was immediately suspicious of men who managed to only say the right thing in their conversations with the fairer sex. More than once she’d seen her peers swoon for a man who presented himself as wholly doting and refined, only to show himself as stubborn and as affectionate as a mule once wed. Or worse.

She had vowed to herself that she would never succumb to such a match, but now all the choice had been ripped from her.

And Captain Rogers was rushing from the gate with only the right things pouring from his lips.

“Well put, Captain Rogers.” Natasha said blithely.

Mr. Stark looked between Sutton and Captain Rogers before he clapped the man on the back and gave Sutton a wink.

“Mrs. Barton,” he said, “would you do me the honor of a dance? It looks like your husband is momentarily distracted by the buffet table.”

Natasha’s eyes sparkled despite Sutton’s nails digging into her arm.

“It would be my pleasure Mr. Stark.”

Propriety forced Sutton to relinquish her hold on Natasha despite the growing anticipation in her stomach. The last thing she wanted to be was left alone with the man her mother would guilt her into marrying.

Mr. Stark left with Natasha on his arm and Sutton turned back up to Captain Rogers. His gaze was elsewhere for a moment, but he turned to her before she could search to see where he was looking. The smile he gave her was pressed and obligated.

“Would you like to dance, Miss Regan?”

Nothing would delight her more than to deny him and find a more quiet corner of the party to retreat to. But she could see her mother now, off behind Captain Rogers, and she was giving Sutton so murderous a glare that to follow through with her own wishes would be tantamount to suicide.

And denying him would be a sign to everyone that she agreed his social standing was in ruin and she wanted nothing to do with him. With her family’s good name, it could destroy him most thoroughly.

Sutton’s face split in just as obligated and polite a smile as she held out her hand.

“I would be honored, Captain.”

They made their way to the dance floor and Sutton felt all the eyes in the room upon them as they took their places. Natasha selected an especially lively song and Sutton readied herself as she reminded herself of the first steps to the dance. Captain Rogers stood across from her, his shoulders a little too tense and his eyes not quite meeting hers.

The music started and everyone stepped forward, nearly coming together, hands up, and stepping away. Spinning, turning, weaving around each other. Sutton saw Captain Rogers clear his throat rather than heard it before they stepped forward again to circle each other.

“I’m assuming your mother already informed you of her designs for us.”

Sutton bristled internally, but focusing on the dance helped keep her from glaring outwardly.

“Recently, yes.” She replied. “I have to thank you both for finally including me in on the details of my future.”

They pulled away, twisting about the room, and Sutton felt her love of the dance wain as Captain Rogers’ discomfort only seemed to grow.

“Your mother approached me with the proposal,” he said when they next met. “In my situation, I have just as little choice as you.”

Sutton’s hackles rose at that and her eyes sharpened.

“Really, Captain? Last I checked, I had little choice in the success of my father’s business, while you had every choice to cut Captain Rumlow out in the town square where all could see you.”

This time Captain Rogers didn’t duck in uncomfortable sheepishness. His own look hardened and his jaw tensed in defense of his actions.

“You don’t understand the circumstances.”

“You should know that circumstances hardly matter to the masses.”

They turned again and Sutton made eye contact with Natasha at the front of the dance line. Natasha grinned, hopeful, and Sutton frowned. Natasha made a face in return. Sutton would have to have a word with her after the ball for leaving her like this.

“Do you object then,” Steve said as they held up hands, nearly touching, and turned, “to marrying a man with what you consider a tarnished reputation? Without knowing the details of such?”

“I object to marrying a man I don’t know when I swore to marry for no less than love.”

“You anticipate that I’ll fail to reach your expectations of love.”

“I find it interesting how you assume my agreement to this arrangement without asking me, and now know my innermost thoughts on the future. Your ability to know a person after mere introductions astounds me.”

They spun away from each other, back into their lines, and Sutton’s heart pounded as her anger swelled. How dare he! How dare he imply that she was the one in the wrong here. When she had so little choice in life compared to him; how dare he scoff at her for wanting to cling to this one decision.

The music ended and the lines bowed and curtsied to each other, finishing the dance. Another woman hurried to the musicians to request the next song and dance. Sutton smoothed out her dress and brushed back some of her curls. As much as she loathed it, she knew what would happen next.

He would ask for one more dance, to openly show his interest, and she would be obligated to accept thanks to her mother. Then everyone in attendance would share murmurs about the possible forming connection.

Before the end of the ball he’d go to her mother, to ask to call on her, and her life would be locked on the track of her mother’s design. For her good.

She swallowed and attempted to catch her breath as she briefly met Captain Rogers eyes. He gave her a nod and another bow and stepped away from the dance floor.

He did not ask for another.

Sutton blinked at the dismissal. If he were just another man at the ball, she would not have thought twice about it. One dance was perfectly acceptable. But Captain Rogers was supposedly agreeing to an arranged marriage with her, and not making an effort to show interest in her was shocking to say the least.

She and her mother made eye contact from across the room, and her mother appeared just as scandalized and irate. Their saving grace was that no one else was aware there was supposed to be an interest, arranged or otherwise. Or likely Sutton’s own reputation would have been gossiped about as well.

A thought arrested her. Perhaps he now wanted to call off the arrangement because of her bluntness in their conversation. Her mother could never know the cause, if that were the case. She feared her mother’s wrath more than she feared being left destitute.

Though, would he really call off everything because she had the audacity to be blunt with him? When he was the one who asked? If nothing else, it seemed her opinion had offended him enough that he felt the need to slight her.

A man with such a delicate disposition, over such a matter as a personal conviction besides his own, didn’t bode well to Sutton for what she would be subjected to in a marriage.

If there was still a marriage to be had.

Her mother idled in the crowd, obviously fretting now, and Sutton left the room. Her emotions were too tumultuous to be in public and she needed some space.

[][][][][]

First Lieutenant James “Bucky” Barnes smiled sharply as Steve Rogers stepped off the dance floor. It was a strained expression and Steve frowned when he saw it.

“What is it?”

Bucky clapped his good hand on Steve’s shoulder and kept the smile for the sake of the company in the room.

“You’re finished dancing already, then?”

Steve tipped his head and shifted so that they could speak with a sliver more privacy.

“Can I assume you don’t approve.”

“Steve, you’re meant to be showing interest in this girl. Wooing her; and you only ask for one dance? There’s not another ball scheduled later this week. Now is the time to lay foundations.”

“Miss Regan made it plain that she doesn’t agree with the arrangement,” Steve said. “I won’t force her hand under public pressure.”

“Steve, you have likely insulted her or called this arrangement into question. Unless you mentioned these thoughts to her before the dance ended?”

Steve remained silent making the answer obvious. Bucky huffed under his breath.

“Steve, I lost an arm and yet you manage to somehow be more of a frustration for me.”

“Last I checked it was my reputation at stake, not yours.”

“You say that as if I don’t care about your reputation for you; since someone has to. You want to stick to your convictions and have nothing to do with Captain Rumlow, fine. But don’t toss aside your best opportunity to keep your family’s name in good standing.”

Of course Bucky, as ever, had a fair point. Steve’s parents had labored to build his family’s name from the ground up, and it wasn’t a burden he bore lightly. As their only child, it was his duty to continue the legacy they started. To continue on so their struggles were not in vain.

And it seemed to do so meant marrying one Miss Sutton Regan.

If she would accept him.

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ohwereusingourmadeupnames · 4 years

Text

This Too Shall Last

Pairing: Peter Parker/Tony Stark Rating: Mature (M) Notes: This is based off of @dumb-bitch-starker‘s post that you can find here! I saw it and had to try my hand at it. I’ve got some personal experience with marriage young, so it was a fun one! Warnings: NSFW stuff - lots of fluff, be ready! Summary:

Peter Parker is from a small town in rural Virginia. After winning the National Spelling Bee, he's given the opportunity to go to an advanced private school. Midtown is where he meets Tony Stark, a brown haired boy with an affinity of beating him to the punch. They grow up together and find that what they were looking for wasn't all that far away. This is the story of how these two move from friends to boyfriends to husbands.

Or, the one where Peter Parker is a genius and has an epic friendship turned romance with Tony Stark.

Read it on AO3 here

For Peter, being smart was his foot in the door to a world that for the longest time, he could only imagine. In the town he lived in with is Aunt, there was one school that catered to all of the grades, K-12. There were two stop lights and a singular gas station nestled in the heart of town. Aside from a handful of transplants, most of the town’s population consisted of long lines of families and those that were establishing them. May still had her mail delivered to her by the same man from her later childhood.

All and all – getting out of that place was the only option and luckily – Peter was blessed with the means to do it.

After winning the National Spelling Bee at the young age of 6, Peter got several scholarship offers for some of the private schools around the Virginia area. It would have been nice to actually get away from his little town and go to one of the more prestigious ones – but May needed him around and could only truly afford to see him go 45 minutes away instead of the several hours some of the other schools offered.

Midtown Private catered to the rich of the Virginia Beach area – Peter understood that immediately. Even as a young kid, he realized that his old backpack and battered shoes were something completely different compared to the people around him. It didn’t take a genius (even though he was,) to catch onto the fact that everyone else had drivers drop them off – he watched them file out of their pretty cars from the bus stop every morning. There wasn’t much to be done, though – the opportunity was there, and he planned to take it.

Despite all of the differences between him and the rest of the student population, Peter excelled. After a few days in his second-grade class, it was obvious that the people around him were also of another caliber in the classroom. In his old school, he spent most of his days completely bored. Since the first day at Midtown, Peter felt challenged – his brain finally stretched the way it needed to be. His classmates were able and more than willing to participate in the classroom. A brown-haired boy with quick hands beat him to the punch a lot of the time – but he didn’t mind, there was something to be said about someone just as interested in the information.

At the end of his first week, Peter found out who the brown-haired boy was. His eyes were still wide from the initial shock of walking into a lab that he could fit his entire house into. There were so many different tools and instruments he’d never seen before – things that he couldn’t wait to get his hands on. It looked like a scene out of some of his favorite science fiction movies that played late at night. He sat down at the closest cluster of chairs and looked around with marvel.

The chair at the desk next to him moving on the floor brought him out of his excitement induced trance – he cracked a smile when the brown-haired boy sat down. “You’re the new kid, right?” he asked – the question rattled off without an ounce of hesitation. There weren’t many kids his age that behaved that way; his difficulty making friends stemmed from a lot of things and that was one of them. Tilting his head, Peter took him in for a moment.

“Yeah, I’m Peter,” he finally replied, his body shifting slightly in the seat to see the other kid a little more clearly.

They met eyes for the first time then, the brown of the other’s eyes reminding him the color of milk chocolate melting on the stove. For some reason, that made him feel a little calmer – the hue reminding him so much of fondue night with May.

The kid was smiling at him, his hands flipping open the folder he pulled out of his bag. “Hi. My mom makes me introduce myself as Anthony – but that name is stupid, so just call me Tony.” While he spoke, he slipped a worksheet in front of Peter.

“Do you like science like you like math?” Tony asked him, his eyes looking at the sheet briefly, then straying back in Peter’s direction. It felt weird, having someone understand his likes without evening knowing him – Tony pinpointed him just by observing. He wondered, not for the last time in his life, just what else Tony effortlessly observed about him.

Glancing down at the paper, his eyes lit up when he recognized the microscope on it. Just last Christmas, he got a small lab set that came with beakers and a microscope – he spent hours taking it apart and putting it back together for many weeks after that. The reading level of what he was looking at surpassed even what a class like this would provide for them – so he was immediately excited.

“I love science. I’m going to go to space one day,” Peter muttered, his eyes still looking over the paper in front of him. He wondered where Tony got it – the board at the front of the room said they were looking at the different types of rocks and there wasn’t an accessible microscope in sight. “This is a light microscope, right? What are you looking at with it?” He finally pulled himself away from the difficult information, his brain on fire.

He couldn’t tell if Tony was on the verge of excitement or blowing up at him, the look on his face a little unreadable. “You want to go to space? I want to build rockets. I’ve been trying to read through a book about Apollo 13 – but that words are kind of hard.” He shrugged then, his hand reaching over to take the sheet back from Peter’s desk.

“I don’t know what I’m going to look at yet – my dad said I needed to learn more about it before I could touch his expensive equipment.” Tony made the infamous air quotes and rolled his eyes – the look on his face making Peter laugh.

“My aunt says stuff like that, too. She bought me a starter lab kit last year for Christmas – and I’m terrified to break it. I may never get anything cool ever again, if I do.” He crinkled his nose, the thought making his brain hurt a little. “I’ve taken the microscope in it apart and put it back together a bunch of times – I can help you, if you want,” Peter added in after a second, his eagerness in the suggestion apparent.

Tony took a second to answer back – his cheeks were turned up in a smile, but he stayed silent, regardless. “Okay,” he said simply, a soft look on his face. “Sit with me at lunch – I want you to tell me more about this lab kit.”

That day was forever engrained in Peter’s head – he later came to find out that Tony, who was Tony Stark, son of Howard Stark, the frontrunner in plane, boat, and submarine technology and construction – was the smartest and most sought after friend in the entire school. People did not talk to him for weeks after they sat together that first day at lunch. It was laughable that something as silly as that was the thing that made him an outsider.

For years, Peter ran in the same circle as Tony in a lot of ways. From that fateful day in science on, Tony sought Peter out as a lab partner. Even being in a school where everything was advanced, both boys were more than capable of bigger things. Tony invited Peter to his dad’s lab every now and again – despite how much May hated having to drop him off at the fancy gate whenever he went.

After proving his worth and commitment to thorough research and a safe approach, Tony got access to a lot of cool things; a few of these things he shared with Peter. Between third and sixth-grade, Peter and Tony built a different (and progressively more advanced) robot each year for the science fair. Being friendly with someone like Tony was like being shown a different world; both the boy’s personality and background contributed to that, too. He learned something new about the boy every instance they spent any time together.

Middle brought the ability to do extracurricular activities – an opportunity in which Peter took complete advantage of. Enjoying the robot building process so much, Tony convinced him to join the Robotics team. He also found himself recruited to the track and field team after a startlingly fast mile during physical fitness week. Both activities were so much more than he ever thought imaginable for himself – so he went above and beyond to be amazing at them.

Running came naturally to him, he quickly came to find out. All of his middle school years were spent going to conference, regional, and national meets. The year before entering into high school, Peter broke the 1500-meter record and won a middle school national championship. Walking onto a new campus the next year, Peter found himself embraced by the teammates he had previously and the new ones he gained – not for the first time, he felt surprised by the odd dynamic of the people he luckily found himself surrounded by.

The opportunity to get ahead in college came around his junior year. He took all of the AP science classes and passed with ease, so there wasn’t much left in his high school to take – a select few that were of similar academic standing were cleared to take dual enrollment classes that would count as college credit. There were tons of science he was going to need in college, the ability to knock out a few of them was too hard to pass up.

He barely made it to the early college campus before his first class started late one September – the bus was running behind again and had been all week. Wiping the sweat from his brow, Peter took a seat towards the back of the class – the person next to him none other than Tony Stark. “I thought I’d see you here,” Tony mumbled towards him as he settled in, the now very, very, very handsome boy’s cheeks curling up into a grin. “Did you have to run to get here?

Looking around for a second, Peter noticed there wasn’t much happening – the front of the class empty, no professor in sight. “From the bus stop, yes. The earlier buses always run a little late,” he explained, his chest finally relaxing, the tightness ceasing now that he wasn’t running at full speed, anymore. It felt good to sit down after that.

“That’s no bueno, Pete – I need my lab partner fresh and on his toes. You can ride with me,” Tony stated, his voice definitive, the tone just barely shy of being bossy. “We’re both going to the same place – I don’t mind.” He finished his words with a smile, the look enough to make him laugh a little.

There wasn’t any reason not to accept the offer – the thought of not having to take the bus four times every day sounded pretty dang good. “Okay – if you really don’t mind.” Peter reached across and placed a hand on Tony’s shoulder, his fingers tightening. “Thanks, Tony,” he murmured, his eyes alight.

Tony tilted his head a little, brown eyes watching Peter closely for a second before he nodded – his eyebrows arching. “I really don’t mind. You’re welcome, Pete.” As he spoke, the door opened and the professor walked in, everyone in the class straightening up – the authority of the person at the front of the class still respected at their age.

For the rest of the day, Peter didn’t think too much about Tony or his offer, there were too many interesting things being thrown his way. It wasn’t until they finished their Biochemistry lab that Peter even remembered the offer. Tony caught up to him out in the hallway, his glasses slipping down his nose a little when he stopped in front of Peter. “You don’t have practice until later, right? Want to study for a bit? I’ll take you back when we’re finished. That lab report could use a little work before we turn it in tomorrow,” Tony spoke with such confidence, the quirk in his lips natural looking, not forced like it might’ve been on Peter himself.

The glance down at his wrist was unnecessary, without looking at his watch, he knew it was pushing 2. He wouldn’t need to be back to the high school until 4:30 and with a ride, he didn’t have to worry about catching the bus. “That sounds okay to me – I think I finally figured out how to do the last problem set,” Peter replied, his thumbs slipping under the straps of his backpack. “I think I saw some good reference books when I was in the library yesterday. Let’s head that way.”

That afternoon started a chain reaction of studying together every day after class, the two of them nose deep in books until Peter’s alarm went off. The first couple of times it happened, the dirty looks were numerous – then they got smart about it. Since they were in the early college program, classes ended at the same time every day – so, they rented out a study room and spent the two hours in there, instead. The whiteboards were good for everything they were trying to accomplish, anyway.

One afternoon about halfway through the semester, Peter walked out of his last period lecture hall completely done in. Practice the day before kicked his butt and they were running low on food in the house. He snuck in a granola bar earlier – and his metabolism demolished it before he could even think about being at least somewhat satisfied. School breakfast that morning ran out a earlier than usual, so he was feeling it.

When Tony stepped up to his side a couple of minutes later, Peter looked at him blankly. “I don’t think I’ve got it in me to study today, Tony – I’m exhausted. And starving. Mostly starving, honestly,” Peter babbled, his right hand settling on his stomach – he hoped if he got there fast enough, the growl wouldn’t sound between them.

Peter rolled his eyes when they both heard the gurgle – a spot of red pressing into both of his cheeks almost instantly. He pressed against his stomach a little more firmly then, his thoughts willing the damn thing to shut the hell up. Chancing a glance up, Peter was surprised to see empathy in Tony’s eyes. Despite knowing him relatively well, there was no real way of anticipating how the boy would react – Tony worked on a scale of differing levels of sarcasm. He figured it would take the rest of his life to truly understand the rules to Tony’s game – but it felt good to see the other at least respond positively to his insignificant troubles.

“We’re so caught up on everything, Pete – I’m sure the library can do without us for the day. Do you want to go grab some food? There’s this place, Chester’s, they make the best burgers.” Tony spoke while he fidgeted with his hands, his body much like his mind – always moving, never quite satisfied.

At the mention of food, Peter’s stomach growled again, his mouth watering, too. There were a few dollars in his pocket, the idea of using it to afford food sounded like an excellent one. He nodded his head excitedly, eyes bulging a little. “Yes, that would be amazing. I’d eat your shoe if you seasoned it right. A burger sounds delicious,” Peter agreed, his feet already antsy to start moving towards the door and closer to the food.

It took a little while to get used to driving around in Tony’s fancy car. The contrast to May’s broken-down Chevy made his stomach churn a bit – but on the other hand, he got a little excited about it, too. The black Audi drove like a dream and had an engine that could easily become something too fast for its own good. The inner console was completely touchscreen and the family AI, FRIDAY, could be reached with the controls. One day he expected to walk out to a car that would drive itself.

Settling into the passenger seat, Peter felt better than he did all day and tried not to think too hard about that. In the past couple of months, Peter’s feelings about Tony went from neutral to completely over the hill for him. It wasn’t hard to feel that way about the other, though – Peter knew that from being in school with him so long.

Girls and boys alike would trip over their feet to get his attention. Yet, no one managed to catch it. Tony kept to himself for as long as Peter could remember – no matter how much people wanted him, he didn’t budge. Now that he was starting to feel the same way about the other boy, his stomach felt a little funny – like a weird mixture between giving a speech and watching Batman on TV.

There wasn’t any hope for his silly feelings to be returned, Peter knew that. He couldn’t claim to be a genius without understanding the reality of the situation in front of him. Even still, Peter was unable to keep a lid on it and found himself smiling over at Tony more in the last three weeks than in their entire existence together. Not for the first time, Peter wondered if Tony knew – his friend was too smart not to.

The drive was pretty easy – there wasn’t much traffic at that time of the day, so they were skating down the highway in Tony’s beautiful car in no time. He fiddled with the screen for a while before The Used started to play – the throwback making Peter laugh outright.

“I never pegged you for a 2000’s emo fan,” Peter said through the chuckle, his brain already supplying the lyrics to the song, regardless of his own taunt. Lots of things happened in the early days of Peter’s life – he found a weird kinship with the early 00’s songwriters; their grief and pain were tangible, and he liked that.

Peter watched Tony drum on the steering wheel with one of his hands, the other loosening and clenching with the beat. It was easy to tell that Tony was not a stranger to this type of music – the chorus of Bird and the Worm started and they both broke out singing it, their voices surprisingly meshing together pretty well. “I’m full of surprises, Peter Parker. I also happen to like old rock, too. What do you have to say about that?” Sarcasm dripped from the words, each one settling in the pit of Peter’s stomach – each one making that little flame of want grow the slightest bit bigger.

Catching himself smiling, Peter turned his face towards the window, the cityscape of Virginia Beach flying by them. “I think that’s okay by me. I kind of like surprises. Makes life a little more interesting. I don’t like tomatoes – I’m sure that comes as a great surprise to you,” Peter retorted, his own joke pulling a chuckle from his lips.

Tony shook his head, eyes breaking from the road to glance in Peter’s direction. “Something tells me there’s a lot more to you than just not liking tomatoes. For instance – you can run a 1500-meter race in under 4 minutes. Now that, my friend, is very surprising. I probably couldn’t even make it around the track once in 4 minutes.” Tony joined him in laughter then, the self-depreciative statement nowhere near the truth – Peter could see the obvious signs of that in the way his bicep bulged when he turned the wheel.

“It’s always a surprise to me, too. The last lap, I’m always just running on pure instinct, adrenaline, and dopamine. I didn’t know you knew that, though. We’ve never really talked about it before,” Peter realized, his thoughts manifesting in the words slipping from his mouth. Over the years, they spent so much time together and never broached the layers beneath the surface. Peter felt compelled to change that, even if it was for his own sick pleasure of knowing more about Tony, of having little pieces of him that not a lot of people get access to.

“I like statistics. Me and a couple of the guys from robotics got together to watch last year – it was cool to see the variance in all of our time guesses. You’re talented, Pete. That’s pretty hard to miss.” Tony shrugged then, his hands returning to their incessant drumming on the steering wheel.

Peter was glad for Tony’s shift in attention – the pink color on his cheeks already embarrassing without getting caught out by the boy he wanted to impress. Despite the roaring redness in his face, Peter wrapped himself in the knowledge that Tony noticed him and let the hum of his feelings crank up just a little bit louder.

That first burger stop led to a change in their routine – instead of hitting up the library, they camped out at a table in the corner of Chester’s dining room and studied. At least, it started out as studying. The topics progressively moved from Biochemistry to track and field – then even further past that into a much more personal territory. Peter learned that Tony’s parents weren’t ever around and when they were, he was avoided at all costs. In turn, Peter told Tony about his parents and uncle Ben – about the travesty of the start of his life and the small town he couldn’t wait to get away from.

He figured out pretty quickly how good it felt to simply talk to someone, especially a someone that seemed to understand more than anyone else Peter could remember encountering. Tony listened so intently, like Peter’s words were ones he needed to absorb and digest. Peter felt heard, the feeling so novel that he almost didn’t understand it – that burning sensation of actually being acknowledged. The similar look in Tony’s eyes when Peter gave him the same attention clued him in, though – the boy across from him seemed just as eager to have a pillar to lean on.

And interestingly enough, he chose Peter for the position.

A couple of days before finals week, Tony and Peter were in their normal booth at Chester’s – their shoulders pressed together to look at the textbook between them. The ringing of Peter’s phone shattered the peace of their study sanctuary – he let out a soft sigh at the break in concentration. Answering it swiftly, Peter was surprised to hear the Stanford Track & Field team coach on the other side of the line. After listening intently, Peter dropped the phone back to the table – his chest alight from the news he just received.

“That was Mike Eskind from Stanford – they want to bring me out to campus for a visit when next semester starts.” Peter looked up to catch the tail end of Tony’s huge smile – the look making his guts churn with that all too familiar heat. Shaking his head of the thought, he beamed back – their eyes locking.

“Holy shit, Pete!” Tony exclaimed, his voice the loudest pitch Peter heard him use all day. The boy jumped out of his chair – their gazes still connected. Peter followed suit without much hesitation, his entire body thrummed with excitement and pent up energy. Tony threw his arms around his hips and pulled him close – the throb of the other’s joy enough to make Peter suck in a breath, his own arms wrapping around Tony’s to join in on the embrace.

It felt right – being wrapped up in Tony’s arms. They were solid and warm, the presence of them on Peter’s hip grounding him, keeping him in the moment – the one where he got some of the greatest news of his life. He felt Tony’s head turn a little bit, his breath now gusting against the length of his neck. “Congrats,” Tony mumbled into the skin there.

Pulling back, Peter felt his grin widen, their arms not leaving each other. In the years to come, he wouldn’t be able to say who leaned in first – but all of the sudden, they were kissing. Tony’s lips were warm like the rest of him, the fullness of them pressing elegantly against Peter’s.

The initial kiss was soft, the chasteness of it a little like taking the first sip of a drink to test the flavor. Peter knew in that instant that nothing else would be as good as this – the smooth taste of Dr. Pepper, french fries, and a thing that he could only describe as Tony. It was intoxicating and enough to realize just how fucked he really was.

They inhabited the same space for another couple of moments, then Tony pulled away – one of his hands moving from Peter’s hip to cup his cheek. “I’ve wanted to do that for forever,” Tony whispered, his forehead tilting forward to rest against Peter’s. “Forever,” he mumbled again – the singular fact that they were in the middle of a public restaurant not registering to either of them. Peter closed his eyes and let himself relax into the embrace.

“Me too,” Peter replied after a while, his eyes opening for a brief second before Tony leaned forward and pressed their lips together again. The thought that maybe this might be a thing from now on made his heart skip and his head tilt a little further to the side, deepening the kiss.

Later that night, Peter thought so much about that kiss – about how utterly perfect the first one he ever got was – how, out of all the people in the world, Tony chose him to be on the receiving end of his affection. After getting to know the boy, Peter understood just how big of a thing that was – he didn’t get any in his home life, it made total sense that being able to give it wasn’t the easiest thing. Yet, it seemed to be earlier that day, the memory of Tony’s lips still ghosting across his own.

----

Finishing out the semester with all A’s, some college credit, and a boyfriend still felt surprising – even two months later when he slid into Tony’s car bright and early in the morning. This new ritual of theirs started when winter break ended, and their high school classes started back up. Since they didn’t have any early college stuff until the middle of January, both boys were free to do what they wanted after 11 every morning. Peter didn’t have any commitments until track practice at the end of the day, so they capitalized on it. His lips were so chapped by the end of the three weeks of freedom they had, and the boys were closer than ever.

He still didn’t understand why Tony wanted to drive 45 minutes in both directions to come and get him – but he wasn’t going to complain. Not having to sit on the bus so early in the morning was a beautiful thing, and all the extra time he got to spend with Tony was even better. Sometimes they were early enough to stop off and get some breakfast – and sometimes they skipped the McDonald’s and took advantage of the extra time; Tony’s back seat felt like a second home after so much time in it.

Though they were always all over each other, things hadn’t escaladed between them. Peter knew the feel of Tony’s cock through the tightness of his jeans – he knew the face Tony made when he came in his pants, but that was the extent of it. For a while, Peter worried that Tony would be mad at him for keeping things low level between them. The emotional feelings he felt for the other boy were so strong – he could only imagine what adding more to the physical sense of those feelings would be like.

With the thought in mind that junior year was the most important and the hardest, Peter and Tony kept their hands to themselves more or less and merely enjoyed being in each other’s company. When they weren’t making out in the back of Tony’s car, they studied at Chester’s or in the library, and spent time with May.

She initially wasn’t on board with the whole relationship when Peter first told her about it – then Tony came to the house for dinner and charmed her pants off. The deal was pretty much sealed after that. Tony seemed to enjoy the family aspect of being with her, and Peter enjoyed the look of happiness on his face too much to deprive him.

Peter thought that track season would put a damper on things between them, but it only seemed to strengthen their bond. Tony didn’t have anything other than robotics going on after school and they were currently on a break until championships at the end of the year – so he came to all of Peter’s meets. By the middle of the season, Peter’s teammates recognized Tony and May as his cheering section – and when things got really intense, many of them would join the pair in cheering Peter on. This was his year and the closer he got to it, the more Tony being there meant – the fact that the other cared about him enough to stand in the hot sun and rainy days was motivation and pushed him harder than he ever thought imaginable.

Winning nationals that year felt so sweet – his entire season was more than amazing and a lot of it had to do with all of the love and support he felt on a constant basis. So, it was easy to finally let Tony have the little bit of love they hadn’t experienced with each other yet. It seemed like the perfect celebration for an achievement that most people couldn’t even fathom – let alone achieve three times. The look of pride on Tony’s face made the decision pretty simple. Not even May looked at him like that – like he was the most prized trophy in the world and that Tony was the true winner here, not Peter.

It wasn’t nearly as awkward as he initially thought it might be. Tony spent a long time prepping him – the view of the boy with sweat on his brow and a look of pure concentration on his face something Peter didn’t ever want to forget. He came more than once throughout the process and when Tony did finally press inside of him, the burn of the stretch felt like the lactic acid build up at the end of a race – something he could easily push through. Watching Tony fall apart above him was almost as good as the rush of intense pleasure when his boyfriend finally found his pleasure center deep within. The utterance of his name never sounded sweeter than when Tony gasped it in the throes of pleasure – his lips finding Peter’s as he rode through it.

Slumping together on the hotel bed after they were done, Peter relaxed into Tony’s arms – the other’s soft hands ran over his hair, lips pressing against his neck every couple of seconds. “I love you, Peter Parker. I love you and I’m so proud of you. So proud, Petey,” Tony mumbled, his lips against salty skin disguising some of the words – but Peter heard enough. His heart picked up its pace, the organ not used to this sort of rush. He loved Tony – that much was obvious to everyone that got to see them together. Never in a million years did he think Tony would be the one to say it first, though.

“I love you too, Tony. Thanks for being here. Not just today, either. You’ve been the best support I’ve ever gotten. I can’t thank you enough,” Peter whispered back, his eyes a little teary. Between the exhaustion of his two days of racing and the emotional roller coaster of it all, Peter felt drained – and that meant a little more susceptible to being smacked in the face with his feelings. Looking over his shoulder, Peter reached for an awkward angled kiss – the move stopping the tears in their tracks.

Without missing a beat when they pulled away, Tony pressed a kiss to his neck and shoulder, hands traveling down Peter’s side. “You deserve it. Not just because you’re good – even though you’re fucking amazing. You bring a lot of things to the table, Pete. The more people get to see that, the more they realize just how big of an asset you are. Why do you think your teammates came up with us to cheer you on? You make an impression – you’re the greatest person I’ve ever known.”

Peter turned over to get a better look at Tony, the boy’s words so big. Now that they were facing each other, Peter could see the post-orgasm flush on Tony’s cheeks and the soft smile his lips seemed to be in on a near permanent basis these days. He pressed a kiss to the edge of his smile on both cheeks, then licked his nose in jest. “I think you’re just biased, babe,” Peter decided to say, all of the other words he could have blurted out stuck in the filter – his head everywhere and nowhere all at once.

The rush of air against his cheek when Tony laughed made his body shudder, the goosebumps taking over his flesh a nifty side effect to the soft sound of his boyfriend’s happiness. “You’re probably right.” His reply was quick and followed by a series of kisses against both of Peter’s cheeks. Tony’s hand ran hypnotically from the middle of his back all the way to the top and then back down again – his entire body now completely relaxed into the comfort of his favorite person.

As most do, their relationship changed a little bit after that. With the summer months ahead of them, there wasn’t much else to do other than spend time together. Tony’s parents left the day after they got back from nationals and would be gone for the rest of the summer – which meant they got run of the huge Stark mansion, just the two of them. They spent way too many hours in the lab constructing a couple new versions of some of their older robotics models – and fucking over available surface, too. It was one of the best summers Peter could remember and they didn’t even leave the city.

Throughout the week, Tony took Peter back and forth between his place and May’s – he still needed to do track workouts and such, so he used the mornings away from Tony to do just that. After his last win, it felt important to make sure he kept at it and tried to advance even more than he already was. He committed to Stanford at the end of the school year and didn’t want to give the school a reason to rescind the opportunity they were giving him. He and Tony were both polishing up their essays before sending in their applications – he still needed to get into the school to actually be able to go be an athlete there.

Peter felt lucky, spending the summer days surrounded in the haze of his love for Tony and the fun they could so easily have with each other. Most of his summers before were spent doing odd jobs around town to make a few extra bucks and counting down the days until he could get back to Midtown. It was miserable and Peter dreaded everything about it.

Not anymore, though – the days were dwindling down way too quickly; the freedom of the summer was too sweet to want to give up.

Regardless of his desires, senior year started without much preamble. The beauty of being with someone as smart as Tony came with having every class with him – even their early college classes on the other campus. Each day got to start and end with Tony, the exact way Peter preferred it.

About halfway through the year, May pulled him aside before he could walk out the door – her eyes filled with concern. “Pete – don’t you think you and Tony might be getting a little bit too serious? We haven’t had dinner without him in months,” May said, her face pinched up tight with discomfort. “It’s just – you’re in high school and you two act like you’re a married couple.”

He couldn’t help the laugh that fell from his lips – the truth of that statement hitting him square in the chest. They did and there wasn’t a single part of him that didn’t like that fact. Life with Tony in it was easy – more natural than breathing, even. It never crossed his mind, how the time they spent together might look to people around them. Tony brought him joy and happiness – and those feelings quickly became the sole focus in his life. He felt good and there wasn’t anyone who could take that away from him – not even May.

“Yeah, we do. And that’s okay. It’s not unhealthy, or anything. I like being around him, May. He makes me happy. Isn’t that what you want – for me to be happy? He’s my best friend. I’m not going to give up on the way that makes me feel – even if you think it’s too much.” Peter didn’t wait for her answer, he simply pressed a kiss to her cheek and walked out the door – the black Audi sitting there immediately making him feel better.

Settling into the seat, Peter buckled himself in before reaching across the middle console to put a hand on Tony’s thigh. “Want to know what May just said to me?” Peter asked, a soft smile on his lips. The thigh under his hand moved as Tony adjusted, his boyfriend turning a bit in the seat to see him more clearly.

“That sounds like a trick question – but I’ll bite. What did May just say to you?” Tony put the car into gear and pulled forward, his hand grabbing Peter’s and tangling their fingers together. “If it’s juicy girl talk about me, I definitely want to know.”

Peter brought their joint hands to his mouth and pressed a kiss to Tony’s knuckles – his nose rubbing there for a second. Tony’s hands were always warm, the constant presence of it one of his favorite things about the other boy. “She said we act like a married couple. I can’t lie – I liked the sound of it.” And he did – very much, almost to the point where he wanted it to be the case.

Tony must have liked the sound of that, too – his fingers squeezed Peter’s tightly, his head nodding vigorously. “I too like the sound of that. We might as well be. You’re not ever going to be able to get rid of me,”

Not that he wanted to anyway, Peter thought to himself. The rest of the drive to school, Peter kept the thought at the back of his head – his brain already moving in a billion different directions. They were heading out to California together in the summer, Tony already had plans for their house (though, he failed to share them with Peter,) and his boyfriend was right – there’d be no getting rid of Tony now that the attachment was created. Peter didn’t think either of them wanted to know what it was like to be without the other.

As the year mark of their relationship crept up, so did early acceptance time for Stanford. Between finals week, making goo-goo eyes at each other, and waiting by the mail – Peter felt a little bit of stress. There’d be another opportunity to get into Stanford later on the year, his entire future wasn’t riding on this acceptance letter, yet, he couldn’t stop himself from worrying about it nonetheless.

His record was spotless – but weirder things have happened in his life and he was unable to let himself relax completely. Tony would get in, that was a given – everything about the boy shouted pristine. And despite not wanting to lean on the Stark name, Tony couldn’t escape the prestige that his family offered him.

When the letters did eventually come, Peter almost passed out when he saw the ‘Congratulations’ in the first sentence. He spent so many sleepless nights brainstorming back up plans for no reason. The ability to drop all of the stress and worry away was like lifting the bag from his head – Peter could breathe fully for the first time in what seemed like forever.

Tony pulled him into his arms and pressed a kiss to his lips, the touch lingering only for a moment. “See, you were worried for nothing,” Tony whispered, his nose brushing against Peter’s softly. “Proud of you, Pete.” He kissed him again, this time his lips lingering for a couple of minutes.

The pride they felt for each other made the celebration of their acceptances into college that much sweeter – Tony took his time with every aspect of it, his fingers reverent, his thrusts long and thorough. He pulled every ounce of pleasure from Peter’s skin, while whispering sweet words of nothing the entire time. As Peter hit his peak and felt Tony tumble down with him, the thought of forever came back and hit him again – there was a lot to be said for spending the rest of his days just like this; completely and utterly absorbed in everything Tony was and could be.

----

The rest of the year went pretty quickly after they came back from winter break. Peter scheduled his final semester to be as easy as possible – between the hopes of having his best track season and starting a life with Tony, school was the last thing on his mind. There weren’t too many options for the more advanced classes, anyway – their aeronautical engineering classes the next year would be more than enough.

Some of the best parts of the end of their senior year didn’t come from school or the track. Tony surprised him with a scavenger hunt around Virginia Beach to ask him to prom. The day ended with Tony at the end of their favorite dock with a single red rose. The other knew there wasn’t any need to even ask – they simply put on nice suits the year before and danced the night away. Yet, the fact that Tony went out of his way to make it special felt pretty damn good.

They rode in one of the Stark limos to the big hotel Midtown always held their prom in and spent the entire time making out in the back seat. For some reason, Tony’s fire burnt a little hotter that night. He pulled Peter close and kept him near when they were standing with a couple of the different groups of people they were friendly with. The last slow dance of the night ended with Tony pressing soft kisses to the shell of his ear and muttering about how much he loved him. Getting into the back of the limo, Jarvis didn’t even try to engage them in conversation, he simply rolled up the window and pulled the car away from the curb. Peter couldn’t remember a time when Tony’s touch was so hotly determined.

Their good time at prom translated into an abundance of energy for Peter – the rest of the school year and track season went by in the blink of an eye. Before anyone really knew it, he was lining up for his last ever national’s meet – that thought making his heart thump against his chest. Track was going to get him exactly what he wanted out of his life – it felt a little weird to be closing that particular chapter.

Settling onto the line, Peter closed his eyes and got himself to his spot – the place somewhere in his mind that he could just relax and let his body go. He’d been sprucing the spot up a bunch over the past year, this season one of season best yet because of it. After another second, the gun sounded and Peter took off, his eyes snapping open and completely focused on the run ahead of him.

As he turned the corner of his last ever straightaway in his high school track career, Peter found himself smiling. The last few steps felt like his best yet and when he crossed the finish line to the announcer saying his name over the speaker, he raised a hand in the air and let out a shriek of victory. What a way to end what turned out to be some of the best years of his life so far. Getting there meant so much, Peter couldn’t have done it without the people in the stands supporting him. He looked up to catch eyes with Tony and frowned when he didn’t see him. After a quick look around, Peter noticed him at the edge of the track, a smile on his face.

Tony stepped onto the track; his strides purposeful towards Peter. Tilting his head in question, Peter narrowed the space between them – “Tony, what are you doing?” Peter asked, his face pulling into a grin despite his confusion. “The next race is – “ he started, but was shockingly interrupted by Tony getting down on one knee before him. Whatever was going to come out of his mouth next was stopped in its tracks, his brain all of the sudden narrowed down and completely focused on the person in front of him.

“This is a long time coming, Pete. I know we’re young and there are so many things that are going to change here soon – but I want to be with you when they do. Growing with you these past couple of years has been the very best thing in my life. You put a smile on my face, and I want that for every morning – every day, for the rest of the ones I have left. Marry me, Pete.” Tony flipped open the box of a simple white gold band, the elegance of its basic nature something that made the rightness of the situation standout. The decision seemed pretty easy after that.

Pulling Tony up, Peter crashed their lips together – his sweaty face and the crowd be damned; his best friend and very favorite person just asked him to share forever. He broke the kiss before it could get too heated, their lips separating just enough for Peter to mumble “yes” in the space between them. The world was narrow for a few seconds as Tony slipped the ring on his finger, a huge smile on his face.

“Well, folks – it looks like our record holder and national champion just got engaged; congratulations, Peter Parker!”

His face flushing, Peter urged Tony off the track and out of the public eye – his heart was pounding, and he wanted so much just to have Tony wrapped around him and nothing else. “I can’t believe you did that. We’re getting married,” Peter exclaimed when they were nestled into the safety of the team spaces under the bleachers. Tony was full of surprises and constantly sweeping him off of his feet. It wasn’t necessary – they both knew that. They were solid and nothing was going to change that. Yet, the weight on his left ring finger spoke volumes, the sweet whisper of the rest of their lives together, and the gentle murmur of a commitment that Peter knew Tony was never afraid to give him.

The glitz of excitement lasted all the way through the metal ceremony and the near constant interviews he gave for a couple hours after that. Everyone wanted to know about the gorgeous stranger that stepped up and asked for his hand. They were curious about everything except his last run around the track – and Peter couldn’t blame them. He didn’t have any interest in talking about running when he could still hear Tony’s words in the back of his head, each one fresh – each one trying to dig a hole in his brain and stay there, to be remembered and kept close.

Peter wasn’t naïve, he knew exactly what getting married young would be like. There were still adult things he didn’t know how to do and leaving May’s house to not only go to college, but be someone’s husband – it was scary. The thought of not having Tony with him, for any reason, was much more frightening than anything else, though; he could learn how to do the laundry and pay his taxes, his genius level intelligence needed to be good for something.

Getting back to the hotel room, Tony pulled Peter through the door and proceeded to slip his hands under the warm-up he’d been wearing since he took off his uniform. His skin was dry now, but Tony’s touch brought the goosebumps rushing back, the surface feeling like it might crack and break all over the carpet if Tony’ didn’t keep touching him. A loud cough from the other side of the room stopped them in their tracks – Peter’s eyes widening when he saw May sitting there, a weird look on her face.

“May – what are you doing here? I thought we were meeting you later?” Peter asked, his brain trying to recall when he gave May his room key. She’d been staying at the nice hotel across the street on Tony’s dime, his boyfriend adamant about making sure May was taken care of. Moving a little, Peter felt Tony’s hands fall from under his shirt, the boy grabbing for his palm, instead – their fingers tangling.

It would have been nice, to marvel in the fact that from here on out, they were going to be together. May didn’t seem to have the same idea, though. She stood and closed a little bit of the space between them – the fact that both parties were standing not lost on Peter. He knew her battle tactics – staying on her feet was the easiest way for May to prepare for an attack. Peter bit down on his lip and prepared for the worst – whatever she had to say, it probably wasn’t pretty.

Turning to Tony first, she looked him square in the eye, her lips moving without any sound coming out for a moment, the woman obviously searching for the right words. “When you asked me if you could marry him, I didn’t think you meant ten minutes later!” May exclaimed, her voice cracking a little with the intensity of it. “I would have liked to have gotten some pictures, or something.” She shook her head, then moved her glance over to Peter, eyes now soft – the heat in them gone the second she started talking at Tony.

“And you – you know you’re only 18, right? Marriage isn’t a joke. Picking up his underwear for the rest of your life is taxing and takes a lot of work. Are you ready for that? To be someone else’s before you even figure out who you are?” May’s questions were valid, her empathy obvious in every action she ever made with Peter in mind. His aunt only wanted to see him excel and succeed – he couldn’t hold her worry or curiosity against her.

Dropping Tony’s hand, Peter narrowed the space between himself and May, his arms wrapping around her shoulders to pull her into a hug. “Do you remember what Ben used to say? When the bones are good, the rest don’t matter. There’s no cracks in the foundation, May. It’ll be okay. I’m scared, too – but I want this.” He pressed a kiss to her cheek then, her arms tightening as the words seemed to sink in.

He knew using Ben against her wasn’t the fairest thing he could have done – it was obvious she felt his loss so sharply still, all these years later and she was still so desperately in love with him. His uncle’s words were ones that stuck out, though. Even as a young kid, Peter knew things weren’t always good for them.

It was a struggle to pay rent with their meager jobs – they were constantly pulling at everything they had to make ends meet; for Peter and more importantly, each other. Peter’s favorite memory of the man was when he pulled both Peter and May into his lap – he looked around the room and said, “this house won’t crumble – the bones are too good.”

And for some reason, that stuck with him. At 5, he had no idea what it meant. He looked around for days to find the bones of the house. Then Ben died and he watched May do everything she could to keep things afloat – the literal backbone of the little family unit that they were. Finding himself with Tony finally made the words mean something to him – the foundation of their relationship was strong enough to keep whatever they decided upright and standing, regardless of the things that came their way.

Tearfully, May looked between them, Peter back by Tony’s side, their hands tangled together once again. “You’re such a dick for using Ben, Pete – but you’re also right. And no matter what I say, you’re going to do what you want. I’m not stupid enough to lose either of you because I’m trying to be a responsible adult,” May stopped then, shaking her head and filling the space between them with silent steps. She embraced them both, one arm around Peter and the other around Tony – both her babies now. “I love you – both of you. Even if you are a couple of idiots.”

Tony’s parents weren’t as kind and made their opinion about it pretty clear. Peter stood next to Tony while Howard berated him about bad decisions and getting ahead in life – his heart broke with every word, no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t stop himself from busting open. “Why do you care now? I’ve known Tony my whole life and you’ve never been this interested in what he does. I spent almost every day with him last summer and you didn’t call once. It seems like it’s a little late to have such a strong opinion about his behavior now, Mr. Stark.”

Everyone in the room looked at him for a couple of minutes – the silence sitting heavily in the already toxic air around them. Tony broke the trance and wrapped an arm around Peter’s shoulders, his lips pressing against the side of his head. “I fucking love you,” Tony murmured. He pulled away and grabbed Peter’s hand, the clank of his boots heavy on the floor as he started to walk out of the room. Neither of his parents said anything or tried to stop him – so they walked down the stairs and left.

There wasn’t anything holding them back now.

----

They decided to be understated about it. Tony used a hefty portion of the funds he miraculously did not get cut off from to buy plane tickets to Hawaii. With May in tow, Tony and Peter got married on the beach in Maui – the sunset in front of them and flower crowns made with the local flora in their hair. The man that officiated the ceremony was a native on the island and took them around to all the best spots in celebration – it was absolutely gorgeous to see the beautiful place from such an insider perspective. Their hired photographer took pictures of them on the beach right as the sun was setting. The whole day absolutely magical, despite the fact that it was just the two of them for most of it.

May stayed in Maui when Peter and Tony left to spend their last week before heading to Stanford together in Honolulu. Their penthouse suite was bigger than his entire childhood home and had the most amazing view of the beach from the balcony at the back of the room. They spent their wedding night getting tipsy with May, so it would be the first night they spent together as husbands – and Peter was a little nervous.

For whatever reason, it felt like a totally new thing, being intimate with Tony now. They were the same people – still Peter and Tony, the young idiots in love. And yet, his heart pounded hard against his chest when Tony wrapped his arms around his hips from behind, his husband’s face settling over Peter’s shoulder. “I can hear you thinking all the way across the room. What’s on your mind, husband?” Tony questioned softly, the movement of his jaw a nice weight against him.

“It’s nice to be able to call each other that, isn’t it? Husband.” Peter reached up and placed his hands on Tony’s, his body relaxing back into him.

Tony moved a bit, giving the side of his neck a kiss. “Yeah, it is.” He pressed another kiss against Peter’s skin, and then another – his lips roaming across all the bare pieces of his neck and shoulder that he could find. “You’re the one, you know? I’m glad I finally get to have the world know that now, too.”

Turning in Tony’s arms, Peter wrapped his own around the other’s neck, their chest’s flush together. If he concentrated hard enough, he could feel the gentle beat of Tony’s heart against him – the rhythm of it steady. “Your possessive nature is kind of my favorite. I’m yours, Tony. Forever and ever.” Peter whispered the words, his nose brushing back and forth against Tony’s. “I love you, husband.” He finished off the sentiment with a kiss, his lips slipping across the other’s until he opened up to him, their tongues tangling.

It didn’t take much to stumble their way inside and land on the large bed in the middle of the master bedroom. The hotel chose a high thread count sheet set, Peter sighing when he relaxed against them. Tony really did go all out. Thoughts were soon replaced by nothing but feeling, Tony’s lips devouring his for minutes at a time, his husband only pulling back enough to catch a quick breath, then driving back in.

Tony took his clothes off one by one. He started with Peter’s short sleeve button down. He’d been growing some facial hair, and it tickled when he pressed his lips to the sensitive skin of Peter’s chest. With only three buttons undone, Tony got sidetracked – his mouth finding first the right nipple, tongue and teeth toying with the nub until it was hard and air sensitive. Only then did he switch, the man taking his time to get his desired result out of that one, too.

Nimble fingers finished the job, the tips of them caressing the lower part of Peter’s stomach and ever so slightly under the waistband of shorts and boxer briefs. He didn’t waste any time at all, either – he pulled the button of Peter’s pants out of the loop and tugged the offensive garment down. That beautiful mouth attached itself to the bulge in Peter’s underwear, the warm air making him toss his head back – his traitorous hips thrusting up off the mattress to get more friction.

Peter slid his fingers into Tony’s hair when he pulled the waistband of his underwear down just enough to let his tongue run over the very tip of an already leaky cock. He couldn’t control the babbles that were coming out of his mouth, most of them not even words – just breathless pants and choked off syllables. Tony worshiped at the alter and took his time slipping his boxer briefs completely off, tracing the length of his cock with eager fingers and tongue, then finally closing his mouth around him completely.

The tight grip at the base of his shaft kept him on the edge of his seat for what felt like forever. Both of Tony’s hands were on him, one hand gripping tight, the other moving with his mouth on the downward stroke – it felt like a fire being stoked from the outside in. “Tony, you’re killing me – I’m so close,” Peter mumbled, his hips thrusting up uselessly into the tight grip of his husband’s hand. Brown eyes completely taken by a lust-addled pupil looked up at him, a glow there.

“Cum, then,” Tony challenged, his lips barely coming off of Peter’s cock to get the words out – he felt the hum of every single one.

He wasn’t one to not listen to directions, so he did just that – Peter’s fingers tightened in Tony’s hair, the strands bunched up between them. “Oh, fuck – “

It took him a second to come back around, his eyes blinking the black dots from them to get a better look at the man between his legs. Tony was still laving his sensitive erection with his tongue, his eyes closed, a look of complete contentment on his face. He watched him long enough to feel the heat bubble in his gut – arousal coursing through him once again.

“Mm – back already. How do you want me?” Tony asked, looking up to catch Peter’s eye. He reached down to tug Tony up, his weight settling on top of him once again. He pressed up and gave his husband a kiss, the taste of himself still fresh on Tony’s tongue. The way the essence of who they were tangled together never ceased to drive him crazy – the underlying taste of Tony below the bitterness so intoxicating.

With Tony over him again, Peter could feel his hardness pressing into his hip – the tip wet, small dribbles of precum dripping from it as they kissed and thrust against each other. Breaking away, he let his fingertips brush Tony’s cheeks, a small smile on his face. “How about you sit back and relax for a minute – I’ll show you exactly what I want.” Peter laid another kiss on his lips before using his hands to push at Tony’s chest, his husband moving without much prodding.

“Sit back against the headboard,” Peter instructed, both of them adjusting until Tony was propped up against the back of the bed, creamy thighs straddling him. With eager hands, Peter reached over to the bedside table, his boy scout of a husband leaving the essentials there when they first got in. “Always prepared,” Peter said with a giggle, the lube bottle swinging between them. Uncapping it, Peter poured a generous amount on his fingers and let it warm up – the slickness something he couldn’t wait to feel.

Sitting up a little, he widened his legs across Tony’s lap, his finger finding his own entrance and pushing in. it still took a little while to get used to, the feeling fingers inside of himself, but Tony’s hands running up and down his thighs helped, his entire being relaxing. “You look good like this, Pete. Your eyes are glazed over and your skin is flushed. The running gives you these amazing thighs – and watching you put your own fingers inside yourself… I want to be those fingers, Pete. I can’t wait to be inside of you,” Tony babbled as he watched and caressed, his eyes glued to Peter’s.

He threw his head back, all of his nerve endings on fire – the delightful tug-o-war between the naughty words coming out of Tony’s mouth and the stretch of his own fingers. It was hard to break away from the intensity of his husband’s gaze, but he needed more – he swiftly replaced one finger with two, a groan slipping from his lips from the delightful burn. “I can’t wait either, baby. I can’t – I need you.” He was groaning, the words dripping from his lips without much of a run through his brain to mouth filter.

Neediness in mind, Peter rushed through the rest of the prep – the tease of it doing its job – Tony was mindlessly thrusting up against him and his own body was humming with want and heat; all of it so very delicious.

Peter uncapped the lube again and poured a generous amount directly onto Tony’s cock, his husband opening his eyes wide – “Fuck, Pete,” he shouted, neither of them all that worried about the noise level. He gripped Tony tightly and spread the slick down his cock, his length glistening when he pulled away. “Please, baby – “ Tony mumbled, his hands gripping Peter’s hips tightly as he settled over him.

There wasn’t much finesse to the way Peter simply sat back and took Tony’s length in – he felt the biting burn of stretching muscles and the tight grip of his husband’s fingers, but not much else. His legs were spread wide, his hips merely rolling to keep the entirety of Tony in him, the tip of his dick sitting just barely against his prostate. With the small thrusts up Tony couldn’t hold back, Peter’s innermost pleasure spot was constantly getting serviced, the divine ache of It out of this world.

It didn’t take much time for Tony to start to lose control – “Move, please – more… I need more.” Tony wasn’t much of a talker when they got to this portion of the evening, he showed his pleasure and appreciation through the touches, each caress saying something different, portraying his feelings in that instant. It sent a jolt to his core and spurred him up onto his feet, his arms holding onto Tony’s shoulders for dear life.

Tony’s hands moved to grip an ass cheek in each one, his hold helping Peter lift up a little more. He moved rapidly, then – his control swiftly shot, the shift in position pressing Tony in a little deeper. The only sounds in the room were the slap of skin on skin and harsh breaths – Peter whimpering every few thrusts down against the tip of Tony’s cock; his insides burning, the heat eating him up cell by cell.

When Tony started to lift his hips to meet his thrusts, Peter saw stars – his orgasm rushing over him without warning. “Tony, oh god – “ his cock emptied between them, each splash of cum coating Tony’s still flexing abs.

The rhythmic clenching of his hole must have been too much – Tony came undone beneath him only seconds later. He gripped Peter so hard he could already feel the bruises starting to form there. The delightful wetness within him made him clench again, the move drawing a long groan from his husband’s lips.

“You’re going to kill me one day,” he mumbled, his hands brushing up the length of Peter’s back as he leaned against him. “But what a way to go.” Peter shut him up with a kiss, their shared laugh almost as amazing as the love they just made.

The rest of the week was spent much the same – Peter and Tony tangled up together. They walked along the beach and spent time exploring each of the islands – one of the days, they met May for lunch and talked about all of the cute island guys that she’d been gathering up the courage to talk to. It was pretty perfect – a good way to relax and enjoy the last couple of days of freedom before the fun started.

Tony didn’t let him leave the bed all of the last day. They bought movies on demand and ate really expensive room service. After the burn he got the day before, Peter was grateful to spend the day in the air conditioning, his body worshipped by his very new and very beautiful husband.

----

They said goodbye to May at the airport and took a left when she went right. Peter was expected to check in for track workouts the very next day. It was hard to see her crying face take the corner – Peter wouldn’t get to go back to Virginia until winter break and when they did, it was only for a week. The indoor season would take up so much of his time, he wondered for a while if he’d be able to keep up with the aeronautical engineering program. There wasn’t any point in worrying, though – they hadn’t even gotten there yet.

After the 5-hour flight into Palo Alto, Tony got them a car that took them to their brand-new town house. It was the first time that Peter saw it, so he brushed off the tiredness and explored the two-story home – Tony must have spent a lot of time ordering furniture while Peter took care of their clothes and other belongings.

The entire house was set up – and their books for the semester were sitting on the dining room table. “I had Jarvis come ahead and set everything up for us. He wanted to buy us a wedding gift, but I thought a week in California for a little bit of interior decorating was a good trade-off,” Tony said, his hand caressing Peter’s cheek when they finally settled into the bar stools in the kitchen. “Do you like it?”

Peter moved quickly out of the seat, wrapping Tony in his arms before his husband could move or even think. “It’s perfect. There’s so much space, I won’t even know what to do with myself. I can’t believe this is ours,” Peter replied, a little bit of awe in his voice. It felt weird to be on his own for the first time, but also amazing – they were finally together, finally on their own, and completely free to start their life together.

Of course, it took a little bit of adjustment to get used to things. Tony didn’t do a lot of his own cleaning growing up and Peter washed the dishes for May every night – so it took more than a few discussions to come to a compromise that worked for them both. When Peter was unhappy, Tony listened to his complaints and tried his best. Peter tried to do the same for his husband and most of the time – it worked. The times that it didn’t, there was enough space for the two of them to separate and cool off. Fights were never major, though Tony sometimes tried to make them so.

It was funny – how different married life actually was to what he pictured in his head. There wasn’t much difference to their relationship. They laughed together often and explored the city – when Peter had track events, Tony went with him. People looked at them oddly when Peter introduced Tony as his husband – many of them telling them both that they would have never guessed they were gay, let alone married. Peter merely smiled and pulled Tony towards him; a soft kiss being pressed to the man’s cheek. “Yup, gay and happily married,” he always replied, a soft smile making the words as convincing as they were true.

Tony took a job in the physics lab during their second semester freshman year, his need to fill the time even more pressing now that Peter would be gone pretty frequently. It gave them a bit of separation and made coming back together a lot sweeter. Right before Peter left for his first ever college track meet, Tony took him to the plant nursery to pick out a couple of the foliage he’d been looking at. They initially wanted a pet but figured that a plant dying would be much less scarring than a dog or a cat.

They went home with a whole selection of house plants – a spider plant, a lucky bamboo, some ponytail palms, and a sword fern. They were perfect for the back part of the house where the morning sun peaked in. They would be successful parents one day and that journey started with the plants that they picked out with care. It was fun to argue about how to arrange them and when they ended up on the floor with nothing on but a little dirt from a tipped over pot, Peter figured they’d do an okay job keeping their little babies alive.

College track was a lot different than the high school circuit – the abundance of meets making it a little harder to recover and by default, Peter a little grumpier than usual. A Thursday after a long practice, Peter came home to an empty house. He’d been looking forward to pouncing on Tony, his need for comfort almost overwhelming to the point where he was a little pissed by his husband’s absence.

Pulling out his phone, he called Tony, his head tilting when he heard the man’s distinct ring up the stairs. A soft sigh left his lips when he saw Tony on the bed, fast asleep. All of the bad feelings slipped from him – his face pulling into a grin. The siren song of the love of his life looking so cute in bed pulled him in, too – Peter kicked off his shoes and wrapped himself around Tony, his eyes slipping closed within moments.

The smell of bacon woke him up a little while later. Glancing over at the clock, Peter saw that it’d only been a couple of hours. Grinning at the thought of overcooked pig, he climbed out of bed and hobbled down the stairs, his body still a little sleep addled.

The sight of Tony at the stove was heartwarming, he wasn’t the best cook – he never had to make a meal for himself before moving out here in his life; but he tried, and that was enough. The one thing Peter knew he could make was bacon, though – his stomach grumbled hungrily at the thought.

“Hey, husband,” Peter announced, his voice making Tony turn from the stove with a slight jump.

“Hey yourself. You’re looking good, Pete. That little bit of sleep did you good, baby.” Tony smiled at him warmly, the bright look in his eye never dulling, the intensity of it only seeming to glow more as the days passed. It felt good – to be loved like that. So selflessly, with so much of a person that was willing to give him absolutely everything.

Walking over to give him a quick kiss on the cheek, Peter grabbed his hips, fingers squeezing. “Yeah, thanks – its been a hectic couple of weeks. Conference is coming up, so they’ve got their foot on the gas with training. Speaking of – I can get you a pass, if you want to come.”

Tony flipped the burner off and went about putting things on plates, his husband turning with his hands full to nod enthusiastically at him. “You know I want to come, Pete. I haven’t missed one of your meets yet. It was kind of fun to go to Idaho a couple of weeks ago – I’d never been before.” He set a plate in front of Peter, a glass of orange juice following it a couple of moments later. “I’m going to get your distance coach to like me one of these days.”

Peter ate with one hand, the other playing with the fingers tangled with his own. Tony talked a bit about his day in the lab and told him about the copy of notes he made for Peter that was sitting on his desk in the study. He simply let him talk, Peter luxuriating in the clarity of being with Tony. It didn’t matter if he had a shitty day or that he was tired all the time – having Tony to come home to was nice – better than nice.

A couple of weeks later, Peter was getting ready for a race when one of his teammates came up to him, a question evident in his eyes. Letting out a breath, Peter turned his attention to him. “What’s up, Clint? I’m sure the rumor mill is churning up something good.” Peter said sarcastically, his arms still swinging in an attempt to keep himself warm.

“Why are you married? You’re talented, you’re hot – you could have anyone that you wanted. Instead you’re tied down. Why? Everyone wants to know why.” Clint didn’t beat around the bush, the blush on his cheeks the only sign that he felt a little bit embarrassed by the question. Peter grinned, the question one he could easily answer.

“Because I love him. He loves me. We take care of each other. He’s my best friend. I wanted to be with him forever and so did he. There are lots of reasons.” Peter’s smile grew when he saw Tony coming his way, his husband carrying a Gatorade and a hot dog, the bottle being thrust his way the second he was close enough to Peter. “Because he buys me Gatorade without asking,” Peter added, his arm wrapping around Tony’s shoulder.

Twenty minutes later, when Peter was pulling up from his push through the last lap, he looked up to see a group of his teammates sitting with Tony, all of them clapping and cheering with him – his husband hopping around like a madman. When they caught eyes, Tony stopped, his fingers coming to his lips to blow him a kiss. He mouthed ‘I love you’ at him – Peter’s heart stopping a bit at the softness of his cheeks and the look of pure affection on his face.

Peter ran to the edge of the track and grabbed the edges of the fence, a huge smile on his face. “I love you too, Tony Stark.”

Opening up the text from Clint a couple hours later, Peter couldn’t help but laugh. Tony looked over his shoulder to see a picture of Peter clinging to the fence, the shot of his side profile showing off the huge smile on his face. “Loving me looks good on you,” Tony whispered, his lips pressing against the shell of Peter’s ear.

“Yeah, it really does.”

#starker #ironspider #peter parker/tony stark #tony stark/peter parker #peter parker x tony stark #tony stark x peter parker #high school au #college/university au #marriage #married au #bobbie writes #dumb-bitch-starker #fics #fan fics

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crimsonrae · 4 years

Text

Bear and Birdie

Chapter One

Summary: AU Howard only ever had Birdie to confide in as a child and Steve only ever had Bucky. So, what happens when more than just a supersoldier serum connects these people? Told in a collection of one-shots and flashbacks, rating subject to change.

Bucky BarnesxOFC

Rating: Mature

A/N: Okay I have this posted on FF and haven’t updated it in a... long time, but I’m going to post here and hope I find inspiration to finish their story, because they live in my mind and I love them.

Chapter One

1935 Brooklyn, New York

It was quiet.

But...it wasn't the world is just silent right now quiet. It was heavy, just shy of tangible.

James Buchanan Barnes, Bucky to his friends, frowned at the silence unsure why the quiet unsettled him that morning. The sun drifted through the cloudy windows of Saint Catherine's Lost Home for Boys in a hazy laziness that only seemed to add to the heavy silence of the lobby. It was almost oppressive. He bit back a sigh as he turned his attention to the paperwork he needed to fill out, lightly twirling a pen through his fingers as he read.

Official release documents – at eighteen-years-old James Barnes could no longer and would no longer be considered a ward of the great state of New York.

Bucky had known this day would come, had known he would have to say goodbye to the only stable home he ever had. He had thought he would feel angry about this day or maybe sad. He had thought he would feel something more than a slight dread and muted indifference. Maybe it was the fact that he knew the orphanage could never be a true home, a place to come back to when life became too much as he grew older. Hell, when he had arrived he hadn't intended to stay as long as he had, it was just…it was just the world seemed to have other plans for him.

If he was being completely honest with himself, the orphanage had stopped being home over a year ago. Maybe that was why he felt so indifferent to this whole process.

The lack of funding that Saint Cat's had received in the past few years had caused Bucky to ease away from the system long before it was ready to release him. The parish fought for every penny to feed and dress the growing number of children under its care. Yet, he hadn't felt right taking those meals and clothes when he knew he could take care of himself. He had spent his spare time working odd shifts down at the docks and at various diners in the area. Whatever work he could find he would take. He probably would have dropped out of school, if not for his entirely too lecture-friendly best friend - Steve Rogers would drag him off to class whenever necessary. James smirked, he had graduate by the skin of his teeth and he knew it. School was for the smart cats like Steve, not dumb bastards like him.

Not dumb bastards like him.

The paperwork seemed to glare up at him in stark black and white confirmation of that thought. James sighed resignedly, not entirely sure where his head was at as he finally lifted his hand to scrawl messily across the bottom of the page.

It was official now – he was no longer a lost boy, only a lost man. He snorted quietly, somehow that seemed far worse.

A muffled cough disturbed the oppressive silence and made Bucky blink up from his release papers directly into the sad green eyes of Sister Madeleine. He had forgotten she had been waiting for him to finish. The old Sister seemed to fade into the framework of the lobby. Always a part of the structure, but infinitely her own. Bucky pushed a small smile to his lips as he handed her the papers. Neither seemed to want to disturb the odd silence of the lobby as they waited for the other to speak. They didn't have to – the sound of shallow steps and a light grunt caught their ears as they turned toward the hallway entrance. Bucky nearly rolled his eyes.

"Stevie, what're you doing?" James sighed tiredly as he watched his best friend trudge into the lobby of the orphanage carrying a duffel that was almost as big as him.

The shorter blonde sent James a pointed look that said he shouldn't be surprised. In truth, Bucky wasn't. He had half-expected Steve to show up at the boarding house with a room key already in hand. In their almost decade long friendship and adopted brotherhood there wasn't much that Steve Rogers could do that Bucky didn't see coming, "You didn't seriously think I would stay here with Richie Long and Herman Dutt, did you?"

Bucky didn't even blink at the mention of Steve's long time tormentors, knowing it was a smokescreen. He merely quirked a brow, "And here I thought you three had made nice."

Steve snorted, "There's making nice and then there's being friendly, Buck." He paused as he ruffled through his coat to pull out paperwork that looked suspiciously like the documents that Bucky had just signed before handing them over to Sister Madeleine, "Sides, it's not like I'd be staying here much longer."

Bucky frowned as Steve glanced at him with a sly smile and certain spark in his blue eyes. Steve had at least another ten months before his release papers would need to be signed. He pursed his lips in question when the light bulb finally went on, "You got it. You got the scholarship."

Steve nodded almost shyly and Bucky just about crowed. Somehow, Steve had managed to graduate a year early with Bucky. James hadn't questioned it. He knew how determined his best friend could be and that he was smart enough to understand all the extra work. But the scholarship to Columbia...The scholarship had been a goal of Steve's since they had started high school. Bucky knew it had to do with a promise Steve had made to his mother before she passed...but Columbia.

Suddenly, leaving Saint Cat's didn't seem as unsettling. He grinned widely at his friend as he snatched his duffel up from the ground. Once again forgetting Sister Madeleine's presence as he nudged Steve in the shoulder, "This calls for a celebration. Let's go get some breakfast down at Mel's."

"We can't afford Mel's." Steve stated dryly as he followed Bucky's lead, unable to keep his small prideful smile from his lips.

Bucky just chuckled, "I think Cassie is working this morning. She'll get us something. We're celebrating Stevie. Man, you just got into Columbia. You'll be rubbing elbows with the blue-bloods soon enough."

"God, I hope not." Steve muttered amused. He tried not to shake his head at Bucky's excitement. He hadn't even been that happy when he received his acceptance letter, but it was good to see that smile. He hadn't seen Bucky smile at much lately. Swallowing tightly as the duo stepped outside he reached into the side of his bag and pulled out an envelope, "Here."

James frowned curiously as he took the wrinkled envelope. There wasn't paper inside. The contents too bulky and hard in his grasp, "What's this?"

But even as he asked, his fingers were prying open the flap to let loose two brass keys. He knew these keys. Steve almost fidgeted in place as he met Bucky's sharp gaze, "Aunt Mabel never sold Mom's apartment... just packed up and headed home to Oklahoma after...well after. And we need a place, so."

"Stevie..." Bucky started, unsure what he wanted to say, but knowing he should say something. Sarah Rogers had died in her apartment after a long drawn out battle with a sickness that he could barely understand. He couldn't see Steve living there...not after everything, "We can find another place."

"Like where, Buck? The boarding house you've been going to?" Steve pushed stodgily, "A roof is a roof, right? I can deal."

"The boarding house ain't so bad." Bucky murmured tiredly, because he couldn't quiet see Steve living there either.

Steve shrugged, he wouldn't admit that he didn't want to live in his mom's old run down box of an apartment, but he also wasn't ready to sell it yet. He hadn't even finished going through her things and she had passed over two years ago, "The apartment ain't so bad either, jerk."

James had a few reservations about that statement, but he wouldn't fight about it with Steve. Not now, maybe not ever. Instead he rolled his eyes and slung his arm around Steve's shoulder, "So, how long have you known about the scholarship, ya punk?"

"A week."

"A week? You didn't tell me for a week? You really are a punk, you know that?"

Steve snickered, "I think you'll get over it."

"Nah, we have a week worth of celebration to do now." Bucky said boastfully as he pushed his thoughts and Steve's away from Sarah Rogers.

Steve nearly rolled his eyes as he held in a groan. He had a week of Bucky trying to drag him out to a club or with a girl now. It wasn't the worst fate in the world, but he was sure it would be the most exhausting. The two sniped at each other as they walked. Their feet automatically moving where they needed.

The duo made it halfway to Mel's Diner when Steve snorted and nudged his friend, "Hey Buck?"

"Yeah?"

"Happy Birthday."

●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●

1935 Kingston, New York

It was an unbearably hot morning. The sun seemed to be reminding the world that it was a giant ball of burning gas. Well maybe not the world, but the heat was definitely making its presence known to the small group segregated in a cemetery just outside of Kingston. Elena Turner stifled a sigh as she tried not to tug at the sleeves of her mourning dress. The satiny material didn't breathe and was beginning to cling to her skin…she wished the preacher would talk faster, this farce of a funeral needed to be over. She felt her cousin shift uncomfortably next to her and knew that he too was becoming impatient. She couldn't help, but turn to look at him. His eyes were glazed red and glaring miserably at the wooden coffin perched before them. He had foregone any pretense at being composed and was pulling clumsily at his collar.

Elena supposed it was for the best, Howard was supposed to be playing the role of the grieving son. She doubted that anyone, but herself and a few servants, knew that his pallid complexion and bloodshot eyes were the result from a night of drinking in celebration, rather than crying in sorrow. He was beyond hungover and the strange heat was doing nothing to make him better. She only hoped that he wouldn't do something incredibly…stupid.

"Stop fidgeting." Elena warned quietly, "There are more than enough people staring at you."

"I think I'm going to throw up." Howard murmured uneasily as he continued to pull at his collar. He could care less about the people watching him. He had spent the past week in a wild state of relief, shock and horror and it was almost over. As soon as the coffin was in the ground, he could move on.

"Please don't." Elena said with a small grimace, "I told you not to drink so much last night."

He rolled his eyes and instantly regretted it as the sensation of a million needles pierced his skull, "How was I supposed to know it would be such a wretched morning? Isn't it supposed to rain at funerals?...God, I'm dying."

"You're not dying, you big baby. Besides, I think the world is rather happy that your father is no longer in it, I know I am." Elena muttered lightly as she watched the preacher finally close his bible and step back from the coffin to let the gravediggers have access.

Howard nearly cried in relief at the sight of the slightly grungy men, "Give me a break. The only person mourning daddy dearest is your mother."

As if the woman in question could hear his words from across the aisle of folding chairs, Vitoria Turner, sister of Howard Stark Senior, let out an awful screeching sob. Elena was sure the entire congregation cringed at the sound as she tried to hold back a groan of disgust. She could see her older brother, Fergus, quickly coming to her mother's aid with a handkerchief. It wasn't even eleven in the morning and already the day was too long.

"Think she'll still be crying when she finds out that father left her out of his will?" Her cousin murmured amusedly as he watched the spectacle his aunt was making.

"Yes, except then the tears will be real." Elena muttered dryly as she turned her attention back to the lowering of the casket. She honestly didn't want to think about her mother receiving that news. The woman was intolerable on a good day; on a bad day, Vitoria Turner could make Satan cry, "Can I stay with you when that happens?"

Howard sent her a sympathetic look, "Do you even have to ask, Birdie? You're always welcome in my home." He tugged at his collar again, "My God, what is with this heat? It's barely even May. I swear this is my father's doing. He's making sure I'm miserable even when he's gone."

"Don't say that!" Elena whispered harshly as she went pale at the thought of her uncle still having any influence on the world.

She sensed Howard's sharp eyes studying her and suddenly felt her stomach roll with silent shame. He hadn't been the only one to have a tumultuous week. She had been bouncing between the same emotions he had, the only difference was that Elena knew they would not be able to move on as easily as her cousin seemed to think. Her eyes drifted back towards the rectangular hole in the ground, and suddenly, her dress wasn't the only thing unable to breathe. What had she done?

As if he knew what she was thinking, Howard quickly grasped her hand and squeezed her fingers. Her blue gaze quickly snapped to him, but all Howard could do was shake his head. Don't fall apart now, he was silently trying to tell her. Not yet.

"Where's that flask you snatched this morning?" He whispered instead, no longer meeting her stare. If he had, then he would have seen the exasperated disbelief that sparked in her blue orbs.

"I'm not giving you anymore alcohol."

Howard bit back a smile as he heard the annoyance coating her voice. However, he hadn't been asking for the flask for himself to use, but for her. Elena could use a little alcohol to calm her nerves. He turned to explain this to her, but was only able to get his mouth open when another resounding screech was heard from the other side of the aisle as the mourners began to stand for final farewells.

Elena glared at him, "If I have to deal with my mother sober, then so do you."

Howard wisely kept his mouth shut and stood to receive the forming line of condolence wishes. Suddenly, he wished she had given him the flask. In a perfect world, he would not have had to arrange a funeral at the age of sixteen. His eyes drifted toward the now lowered casket that had induced Elena's minor panic moments before, but then he should not have killed his father either. His hands went clammy and the headache he had been nursing all morning seemed to become even more unbearable. He just needed to get past today. A moment later, he felt Elena come to his side. Her hand lightly tapped his elbow to let him know that she was there if he needed her. He smiled gratefully at her.

"Uncle Leo is here." Elena whispered as he began to shake hands, "He'll take us back to the house once we're done here."

Howard nodded his understanding as he spared another glance toward his father's grave. As he glanced back at the mourners, he caught Elena's gaze. A look of grim understanding passed between them.

No one could know.

Next Chapter

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banashee · 4 years

Link

Part 20 of my @badthingshappenbingo

Square: Verb al abuse

Please mind the tags and warnings in the bottom notes!

Tony is sitting on the living room floor, quietly occupying himself with a wooden car that he’s pushing back and forth on the marble floor. He’s been doing so for hours, as his day has been rather uneventful.

He’s spent all morning with Jarvis, who is now preparing lunch and asked Tony to play by himself for a little while. The butler reassured him he’ll only be one room over and just a call away, so Tony had agreed, settling down with his toys.

Even at four years old, he’s already showing signs that he’s almost certainly inherited his father's brilliant mind. While being a curious child, attentive and intelligent, he also likes to explore the world in his own way, just smelling the flowers and playing around. Just like any other child does.

But his son being just like any other child is not good enough for Howard Stark.

So when Howard walks into the room, distracted and talking to no one in particular, he almost trips over one of the other small wooden cars on the floor.

The steps make Tony look up from his game, face lighting up at the sight of his Dad. But Dad doesn’t look happy at all, he glares at him and snarls angrily.

“For fuck’s sake, Tony! Pick this up! And go do something useful instead of wasting your time.”

One of his hands is audibly hitting the doorframe, and then Howard is leaving Tony there, sitting on the floor and completely shocked by the outburst of anger. He’s so taken aback, he doesn’t even cry, simply remains where he is, speechless.

The little boy looks after Howard, his brown eyes wide and shiny while he’s still trying to make sense of it all. He’d only been playing, and he didn’t mean to mess up.

The toy drops out of his small hand and clatters to the floor where it lands on it’s side.

Then, he is gently picked up by Jarvis, who came rushing out of the kitchen as soon as he’s heard Howard yelling. Tony wraps his arms around the butlers neck as he scoops him up in a well practised motion, pressing close to him and still in shock. This certainly isn’t the first time his father has yelled, but it’s the first time he’s scared him like this.

It still rings in his ears, and Jarvis keeps him wrapped up in his arms, hoping to comfort the boy. They stay like that and the toys remain where they are for now. If Howard comes back now, which is unlikely but still, Edwin swears he’ll get in between his master and this child, no matter what.

Jarvis never raises his voice. He is always friendly, always calm, even when he is scolding. With him, Tony feels safe at any given time.

When they pick up the toys from the floor and put them away, Jarvis keeps talking to him in that patient, reassuring way, voice laced with britishness even after so many years overseas.

“Your father doesn’t mean it.” he says, faintly hoping it is not a lie, but even so - for now, Tony is still young enough to believe it - he probably won’t be for much longer.

“But it is important that we clean up after ourselves and not leave our belongings laying around where people can trip and hurt themselves.” Jarvis explains not for the first time as they pack wooden cars with little wheels into their box on the shelf, and Tony nods, because he knows but needs to be reminded sometimes.

“Okay. I’m sorry, Jarvis.” he says, looking up at the kind grey eyes with his own dark ones.

“It’s alright. Just try to remember it next time, okay?” Another nod, and he continues, “Thank you still for apologizing.” He’s smoothing down the boys dark hair with one hand, trying not to dwell too much on how he always leans into even the smallest of affections.

Then, he takes Tony by the hand as they walk towards the garden.

It’s a beautiful place, various kinds of rich and colorful flowers everywhere. There is also a swing set in the back, and Jarvis is leading him right there.

“We shall go outside and occupy ourselves there, Master Anthony. Perhaps I will be able to sneak out a bowl of ice cream for you later.” he adds with a small smile, getting a bright smile and excited little “Yai!” in response.

But he is wondering in the privacy of his own mind for how long this will be enough to keep this little boy safe. How long until leaving the house for a bit won’t be enough to wait for Mr. Stark to calm and get a grip on himself.

He is well aware that Howard's drinking has a lot to do with his mood swings, but it is no excuse.

Tony might not be his own, but Edwin Jarvis loves the little boy just the same and will do anything to keep him safe and happy.

*+~

“Start over. You can do better than that.”

Howard sounds cold and disinterested, doesn’t even really look at the machine that his son is presenting to him. He empties his glass and pours another drink, waving him away.

It stings - it always does, but Tony turns on his heel and leaves, biting back the answer he would like to give. This answer involves many strong words and a lot of sass .

‘ Maybe someday ’ , he thinks. ‘ Someday, I’ll tell him where to shove it. ’

Tony isn’t too sure it would even change anything.

Soon after this particular interaction, Tony simply stops showing his father what he’s built. He’ll get praise when there are cameras or reporters around, but he knows it is all for show - he tries not to latch onto that, knowing it’ll only get him hurt in the end. Besides that, even at twelve years old he already has developed a distaste for reporters and camera teams. Their presence means putting up an act, playing happy family.

His “public face” is well practised by now, and he hates it.

By the time he leaves for college three years later, it is fine tuned to perfection.

By the time he’s twenty-one and owner of his father’s multi billion dollar company, with Edwin and Ana Jarvis no longer alive and both parents dead and buried as well, his public mask slips in place almost effortlessly.

He kinda hates himself then like he did as a child but at the same time, it becomes like a suit of armor - it works.

*+~

Many years down the road, Tony is sitting on the grass in his backyard where a lake spreads out for miles and miles behind him. It’s a beautiful spring day - not cold, but not too hot, either. It’s perfect, and in moments like this, his life as it is now still like a dream sometimes.

Tony smiles down at his daughter sitting in front of him with her tiny arms outstretched, excited she just won their game of Memory - again.

Morgan squeals in delight, face bright and joyful and so full of love, it almost hurts. She’s nearly four now and living with her is like having a ray of sunshine around at all times.

Tony picks her up and lifts her high in the air for a few seconds and Morgan giggles, the happy sound traveling through the entire garden and into the house, where Pepper is on a conference call with a group of SI managers and she smiles, quietly bathing in the happiness that is their home. She’ll join them as soon as this conversation is done.

Back out in the garden, Tony has flopped onto his back and laying in the grass, sun shining into his face and Morgan cuddled up on his chest. He’s so incredibly happy - having their daughter is like a miracle, and he wouldn’t ever trade it for anything. It also makes him think of his own father, even after so many years of largely ignoring the topic whenever possible.

The thoughts of Howard Stark are very rarely happy ones, and Tony thought he would have finished dwelling on it - he’s an adult after all, and in control of his own life now. Struggling with insecurities and memories, sure. Amongst other things. But at least he can be his own person now.

But ever since Pepper got pregnant, the thoughts about his father kept creeping back into his mind. They have talked about this, still do, and Tony has sworn from the start that he wants to do everything different now that he’s got the chance.

From the day Morgan was born, he kept asking himself how a parent could fuck up as much as Howard had. And once again he swears, he’ll do everything different to break the cycle of coldness and neglect.

Morgan, too, has inherited the brain that seems to run in the Stark family - pair that with Pepper’s own intelligence and wit, and you’ve got a wickedly smart child.

They support and encourage her in all of this, but the most important thing is to let her simply be a kid. They support her interest in all the things, let her do little exercises that are meant for kids much older than her, and she solves them with ease. But it’ll never interfere with play time - they want to give Morgan the best and happiest childhood possible. She’ll have to grow up soon enough, so they want her to have as much time to simply be as they can.

And Tony wants to be involved in all of it, unlike his own father.

Children can be messy - stuff breaks, clothes and carpets get stained with unidentifiable substances. It happens, and it really is no big deal.

Sure, both Pepper and Tony are exhausted sometimes and simply don’t have the energy to deal with anything anymore that day. Things get frustrating then, but still, even in his worst state, Tony would rather hack off his own hands than snap or yell at Morgan like Howard did at him.

‘ Break the cycle .’ he thinks, and his daughter seems to pick up at the change of his mood, however small it might be.

“Daddy, are you happy?” she asks, and the genuine question makes him smile and hug her closer for a moment, nose stuck in her dark hair.

“The happiest, munchkin.” he replies, and Morgan wrinkles her nose at the nickname, but the giggles that bubble up betray their ongoing game of her pretending to hate those names.

A little while later, Pepper steps out of the house, now dressed in jeans and one of Tony’s ancient AC/DC shirts instead of the suit she’s usually wearing for work. She finds her two favourite people fast asleep in the afternoon sun.

Smiling, Pepper simply lies down next to them, head pillowed on Tony’s arm and one hand resting lightly on Morgans back.

She breathes out, long and content, letting go of the day. It doesn’t take long for Pepper to fall asleep right then and there, too.

*+~

Square: Verbal abuse

Notes:

Warning:

- Child abuse / child neglect - verbal abuse - hitting a wall - Bad parenting - Lasting effects of said childhood abuse - non-graphic brief mention of character death - references to alcoholism

#banashee writes #Bad things happen bingo #howard starks a+ parenting #marvel fanfiction

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theherothechampiontheinquisitor · 4 years

Text

12.16.1991 - Chapter 1

Rated: G - Canon Typical Violence

Realtionships: Pepperony, Howard/Maria Stark, Iron Dad, Rhodey & Tony Friendship

Summary: On December 16th, 1991 Howard and Maria Stark were killed in a tragic car accident. Or at least that's what their son and the world is left to believe. 25 years later, Helmut Zemo lures Tony, Steve and Bucky into a Siberian Hydra base to reunite a family...and use The Winter Soldier to destroy it once and for all.

Howard and Maria were kidnapped by The Winter Soldier and forced to work for Hydra. Through a turn of events they are reunited with Tony, and Howard sets out to make good on the promise he made to himself when he was captured...to begin the long road of making amends with his son.

Some additional thoughts/warnings: This is Howard Stark friendly. I know a lot of people hate him and there's comics where the character is abusive to Tony and Maria but that's not this world. I am going singularly off of the Howard Stark presented to us in Agent Carter and the brief glimpses in the MCU. Do I think Howard was a good parent? No. He has definitely made a lot of mistakes, but I don't think he is an irredeemable monster either. The second half of the story will be him trying to fix things with Tony and working through why he behaved so distantly. If that is not your bag then I can't say you'll enjoy this. Please don't come at me with Howard hate.

Not everything will be exactly like the movies.

Also HUGE HUGE thank you to @takadasaiko, my faithful cheerleader, idea giver, all around fantastic motivator. I would have never gotten this far without your help and our mutual appreciation for layered characters. <3

READ IT ON AO3

***********

December 16th, 1991

“Asset?”

The voice brought him out of his daze, thoughts finally cleared and focused, pain falling away like a mask from someone else’s body. His cold eyes focused on the man before him.

“Ready to comply,” came the hoarse rasp that always accompanied his awakenings.

“Mission critical. Search and retrieve. First the serums and then the witnesses. I want them brought in alive.”

He nodded his head affirmatively. This would be an easy task.

“Mission marks?”

The scientist smiled slowly exposing crooked and slightly yellowed teeth. “Howard and Maria Stark.” He waited to see if the name would spark any recognition but the Winter Soldier’s face was expressionless as always. “There is a son… Anthony. We are not concerned about him. Do not engage.”

The assassin nodded in acknowledgement and stood, his restraints having finally been removed. His metal arm felt stiff and he rotated it around until he had full range of motion. He towered before the scientist but the man showed no visible fear aside from the quiet rise and fall of his throat as he gulped back a breath of air.

“Mission launch time?”

“Tonight. Prepare yourself.”

The soldier nodded. He had his orders and he knew what he must do. Soon Howard and Maria Stark would be nothing but a ghost of a memory to the world. He needed to prepare.

***

The short ride from the house and to SHIELD headquarters had mostly been silent and Howard knew enough that it meant he was in trouble. He stole glances across the car to his wife but she remained glued to the window, watching as small flakes of snow began to fall over the road.

He reached out to take her hand but she didn't let his touch linger. She pulled away and rested her hands back in her lap and out of his reach.

"Maria…" he sighed. This was not how their vacation was supposed to begin. Of course it also wasn't supposed to involve him transporting a possible trial replication of the super soldier serum either, but he had a job to do too. All he had to do was work now and he'd be free to shoot golf and spend time with his wife by the time their plane landed in the Bahamas.

"It would be helpful to know what I've done so that I can begin to make amends for it and skip the sulking altogether," he offered in the darkness. It was difficult to discern her features in the dark, the only light coming from the street lamps brief flashes as they drove the winding road.

Howard had been married long enough however to instantly recognize that particular glare and upturned lip she leveled him with.

It was about the boy. It always seemed to be these days. So, he waited, allowing her to gather her thoughts in the silence. Maria was never one to hold back long.

He wracked his mind in the meantime of all his interactions with Tony since he'd returned from Europe on Friday. They'd exchanged a couple barbs and sarcastic comments but this was positively tame compared to how they normally got on. Neither of them had even raised their voices once.

The next bend came across steeper and Howard adjusted his speed in the winter weather. He didn't need them to get into a car accident on top of the already heavy atmosphere he found himself faced with.

"Would it kill you to say something kind to him, just once? It's Christmas," Maria exclaimed as if that was the answer to repairing the chasm between father and son.

He resisted rolling his eyes knowing it would only make her more upset. Tony had always been a delicate subject between them. He was her baby, 21 years old and throwing toga parties behind their back or not. She always saw him as that wide eyed baby boy she brought screaming into this world.

Howard used to be envious of their effortless connection. They always understood each other without words and yet Howard for all his genius couldn't even break through the defenses to his son who was so much like himself. He told himself it wasn't from lack of trying but he would be kidding himself. The best he could do was a half drunken confession on an 8mm Tony would probably never see. Or even want to see at this rate.

He never was able to dwell on their relationship for too long. There was always something else he needed to do for Shield, some other invention that Obadiah was breathing down his neck about to create or a tip about the possible crash site of his long gone best friend, Steve Rogers. Tony fell away to the back burner more and more until Howard blinked and his son no longer wanted his attention.

"What did you want me to say Maria?" He asked tiredly, the subject of his failed parenting sapping his energy. "Thank you Tony, for not making international headlines for the second time this year, the PR team appreciates the break? He's not a child anymore Maria. He needs to be preparing to be a CEO, not a Playgirl cover model."

That had been a fun and unexpected month of damage control when that surprise magazine cover dropped to newsstands.

"How many times do I have to tell you that he's acting out for you? He's desperate for your attention Howard, and you're hardly one to be judging lifestyle choices. I seem to remember you not being much different around his age," she reminded him, eyes not leaving his face, daring him to refute her comments.

"Before I met you perhaps, " he conceded. "Before we lost Cap…" Howard shook his head once to clear it even as his hands gripped the steering wheel tighter. Even now Steve Rogers was a sore subject. A constant reminder of his first greatest failure in life.

Maria softened a little and reached for him, her hand offering his thigh a gentle squeeze. "An I love you goes a long way, you know? It won't fix everything but I refuse to believe that this can't be mended Howard. Talk to him. Really talk to him. He loves you so much and you won't let him show it. God forbid if something were to happen…would you really want that interaction this morning to be the last words you said to him? Think about it."

Howard said nothing, keeping his eyes trained on the road, windshield wipers turned up as the snow fell harder. He really needed to get them to the airfield before they ended up stranded on these lonely back roads. There were no chains on their tires and they'd surely be stuck if it continued sticking to the road.

He wanted to argue with Maria, tell her she was wrong, but she hadn't been wrong in their marriage yet. Tony was crying out for help, negative attention being better than no attention at all. He should know. He had done the same to his father, for all the good it had done. His father died before Howard could ever make something of himself.

Christ he needed a drink, but that would have to wait until they made it to their plane. He increased the pressure on the gas slightly, Maria's words filling his mind.

***

The Winter Soldier watched as the Stark's Lincoln passed by the dark bend of road where he lay lurking in patience. As soon as they were around the bend he turned his motorcycle on with a rumble, light shining across the snowy road.

The cold had never bothered him and he found it easy to increase his speed to match the vehicle in the distance. He trekked safely behind them at first, watching and waiting for the narrow stretch of road he'd make his move on.

***

The car had been silent since Maria's last request. She had resumed looking out the window dutifully until her eyes slowly grew heavier and closed altogether.

Howard loved watching her as she slept. For a moment all the cares and worries were gone from her face, wrinkles turning to smooth skin. She looked younger. Happier. A disconcerting thought that her happiest moments lie in the hours she was not awake, and Howard knew he had to try harder. If only for her.

He didn't think much of the vehicle that came up behind them, seemingly out of nowhere. These roads were quiet but well used. He adjusted the rear-view mirror as the vehicle's headlight burned bright into the front end, making it difficult to see.

Asshole.

The vehicle continued trailing them, but soon picked up the pace, alternating between riding on their bumper and backing off. Howard didn't like this at all. He had one hand on the car phone in the center console when the vehicle made its move.

It was a motorcycle and it swung around to the passenger side with skill and ease, the slippery roads seemingly having no effect on its capabilities.

Howard pulled the phone off the hook immediately and held down on the number 1 speed dial to Peggy Carter.

The man on the motorcycle used that time to attack and brought a glint of metal crashing against the back passenger window.

The hit was powerful. Howard dropped the receiver to the floor, both hands flying to the wheel trying to steady the already swerving vehicle, but it was no use, the brakes had locked up and were unable to gain traction on the snow covered roads. Howard could only hope to lessen the speed of their impact.

The last thing that went through Howard Stark's mind, as the metal impacted upon the tree trunk, was not the terrified cry of his name from Maria or the loud voice calling his name from the receiver of the dropped phone.

It was an image of his son the last time he saw him, Christmas hat jauntily covering his face, wearing that old Mister Softees ice cream shirt that Howard had always hated but Tony had always loved.

And he thought, maybe an I love you every now and then wouldn't have been so hard.

Instead, he knew, his son would always wonder if his father had ever cared about him at all.

***

The Winter Soldier watched satisfactorily as the vehicle swerved off to the side of the road and into a tree. A severe impact but not fatal. He passed by them and then looped back around, pulling off the road a safe distance away.

He detected movement from the front seat as he approached the vehicle, but it was slow and dazed. They were no threat to him as he crashed his metal arm against the trunk and opened it. He pushed aside golf clubs and suitcases of clothing until he found what he was looking for.

The slightest indentation of fabric revealed the false trunk bottom and directly beneath was a silver suitcase.

He heard a thump from the driver side door and shuffling through the snow but it didn't matter. The suitcase was opened and the serum contents confirmed. The soldier removed the case and gently replaced the false bottom, smoothing the panel out and covering it back up.

"Maria...help my wife," the dazed voice rang out, not realizing he called out to his enemy.

The soldier looked the white haired man over finally approaching and grasping the man's head in his palm, forcing him to look up. He was bleeding from a head wound and from some cuts where glass had hit his face but he would be fine. His mission was a success.

***

"Please help her…" Howard heaved out to the stranger again, desperately trying to catch his breath in the cold air.

When his eyes were finally able to focus his confusion only grew.

"Sergeant Barnes?" Impossible. He had been dead for over thirty years now.

The Winter Soldier froze for the slightest moment, a spark of recognition lighting in the back of his mind as Bucky screamed to break free. Unnerved he shook it off, quashing the memory.

"Marks ready for transport. The serums are accounted for," he spoke into a small communication device hidden in his sleeve.

Howard shook his head again trying to swim through his confusion to grasp hold of the situation.

"The serums?" He looked and saw the silver suitcase in the man's mechanical hand. This was bad. He had to get those back. Get Maria, get the serums and get the hell out of here and to safety.

"Howard?" He heard his wife’s voice croak miserably from the car.

"Stay," the soldier said releasing his head with a shove, sending his body down into the snow and began making his way around to the passenger side of the car.

"No. Leave her alone," he called weakly. His ribs screamed in protest as he tried to right his body but he had to protect his wife. And he needed to get the phone. He needed to call Peggy. She would help them. She always did. He turned and began to pull his battered body forward towards the open driver's side door.

Maria Stark sat in the passenger seat and looked up at the winter soldier in terror. She also had bleeding from her head but she seemed more in shock than anything. She screamed as he reached in and pulled her from the car, Howard’s name on her lips as she struggled vainly.

The soldier came around the car and threw the woman to the ground quickly when he realized Howard had moved from his position and was reaching for something inside. He grabbed him by the back of his jacket and tossed him backwards again before inspecting the inside of the vehicle.

There on the floor a phone receiver dangled precariously. He grasped it with his metal arm and held it to his ear, listening for anyone on the other end. There was nothing but silence. He lingered a moment longer before placing it back on the hook in the center console.

A dark van came to a halting stop in the road, several men in dark clothes jumping out and removing what looked to be two large body bags. The ones not busy with the bags rushed across the road and the winter soldier supervised as they grabbed the injured Stark's and hauled them to their feet, leading them towards the vehicle.

Howard Stark struggled against the Hydra agents as they lead him, and the winter soldier delivered a swift blow to his side. The man groaned and was involuntarily compliant after that.

The pair were loaded into the back of the vehicle, roughly, the soldier monitoring the scene.

"You won't get away with this," Howard mustered through measured breaths, eyes scanning over the familiar man.

"We'll see," came the quiet response before black hoods were shoved over the couple's heads and the door was slammed shut in finality.

***

Peggy Carter had been getting ready for bed when her phone began ringing. Only a few people would call her so late at night and only one of them was on a mission of sorts.

"Howard?"

No sooner had she spoke before she heard the sound of what could only be Maria in the background calling out for Howard before there was a loud crashing noise.

Peggy nearly dropped the phone the crash was so deafening.

Instantly she jumped into action, thankful now for the new cordless phone Howard had introduced her to. She moved to her 2nd phone line and dialed into Shield. She called for a trace to be placed on the first line, hazard of the job, to narrow down the pair's location and a team to be on standby as soon as the trace came through.

Peggy tried calling out to Howard a couple times but it was clear he couldn't hear anything she was saying. She heard some more indistinct chatter in the background and so remained still, listening for anything that could give away the location or what was happening.

She held her breath when a deep breath came through the receiver, Peggy sat there like that, not daring to make a single noise. Then there was a click and a dial tone as the phone was disconnected.

Peggy let out a deep breath, anxiety welling within her at whatever had just transpired. She could only hope that they had enough time for the trace.

#Mel's Fics #Tony Stark #Howard Stark #avengers fanfic #mcu fanfiction #not civil war compliant #father son relationship mending #tony stark feels #tony stark needs a hug #tony and howard stark both have issues

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saywhatjessie · 5 years

Text

Red Eye, Code Blue

Written for Aspec 2019. 5.5k (Ao3)

Things had never been easy between Steve and Tony. They were pitted against each other from the get-go: the soldier and the guy who couldn’t stop railing against the military. Steve, at one point, had also been the guy who railed against the military but he felt like he had the right, actually serving in it, after all.

They didn’t keep that from letting them work together. They bickered and battled bad guys. They took cheap shots at each other and incapacitating shots at their enemies. They got along best when they were fighting someone else.

But that had been before the Accords.

Steve remembered being back in that room in Bucharest. One of Howard’s fancy pens in his hand, the accords stacked on the table both a threat and a lifeline.

“I'm not saying it's impossible, ” He’d said “but there would have to be safeguards.”

Tony had all but leapt at that. A light in his eyes that made Steve feel like maybe he was making the right call.

“Sure! Once we put out the PR fire, those documents can be amended. I'd file a motion to have you and Wanda reinstated–”

“Wanda? What about Wanda?”

And they’d fought again. Tony was keeping a kid prisoner and he didn’t think Steve would have a problem with it.

“She’s a kid! ”

“Give me a break!” Tony had yelled. “I'm doing what has to be done . . . to stave off something worse.”

Steve had clenched his jaw, looking from Tony to the expensive fountain pen in his hand.

“You keep telling yourself that.”

He’d put the pen down on the table, the clack of the metal on the wood loud as a gunshot in the tension of the room.

He went to turn around but something stopped him. To stave off something worse…

He turned back around. “Tony, I have to tell you something. ”

And he’d told Tony about his parents. About what really happened on that dark and snowy road in 1991.

Tony didn’t take it well, gasps of ‘no’ escaping him, leaning against the conference table for support as Steve told his story. His face had collapsed in shock and grief and then in hurt and rage. By the time Steve had finished, Tony tried pushing past Steve out of the conference room. Steve had had to grab onto him to keep him.

“He’s downstairs! The guy who killed my mom is downstairs. I need to– I have to– ” Tony all but sobbed, trying to push himself out of the hold Steve had taken him in.

Steve was a super soldier. He could keep Tony contained until he had time to calm down.

After a couple moments of weak straining, Tony slumped in Steve’s arms. Steve ran a hand over his back, attempting to comfort, but Tony pushed against him, a silent plea for release.

Steve had let him go and he’d collapsed into a chair, his head in his hands.

“Get out .” Tony had said.

Steve had just looked at him.

“How long have you known and you didn’t tell me?” Tony had asked. Steve’s face had gone a bit strained and Tony had shaken his head. “I can’t look at you right now. We can stay at this compound as long as it takes to get these accords signed but I can’t worry about that right now. I need–” He’d swallowed. “Get out. ”

So Steve had gotten out. He’d gone back to the conference room Sam was being housed in and shook his head when he’s asked what was wrong. He hadn’t wanted to talk about it.

In the end, Steve was glad he’d said it. Bucky had been reprogrammed, they’d had to break out of the building, Steve had to pull down a helicopter with his bare hands.

They’d fought at the airport – Tony maybe fighting more aggressively than he normally would have, but he hadn’t been fighting to kill.

And when Zemo had played them that video, after they’d escaped to Siberia, Tony knew what it would be. He’d looked away. Steve had been glad for it.

“I knew that already,” Tony had growled through gritted teeth. “I know what he’s done. You can’t distract me. ”

And they’d brought Zemo in. And on the flight back to the States, Tony slapped down the accords, throwing a Bic ballpoint pen at his chest.

“Sign. ” He’d spat.

And Steve had signed.

And Steve was happy he’d at least staved off something worse.

It had not been as easy as Steve signing and they were off the hook. The other Avengers who’d fought with Steve had still been on the raft, and Bucky was still a security risk. But with Steve now backing the Accords and with Tony willing to fight for the defecting Avengers, those things had been handled. Messily and tirelessly but handled. As Tony kept reminding everyone, “We have bigger threats, people, come on.”

Things hadn’t been easy to start with, so of course, now that things were worse, they had to get trapped in an elevator together on their way out of the police station.

Being trapped with Tony Stark, it was hard to remember those bigger threats. Especially when Tony kept sneering at him.

“You’re a mechanic,” Steve groaned. “Can’t you fix it?”

Tony threw a glare at him, fingers already working to pry open the control panel. “I have multiple PhDs in quantum mechanics, electrical and mechanical engineering, and physics. You can’t just call me a mechanic.”

“You call yourself a mechanic! I’ve heard you do it!”

“Yes: to kids and Rhodey who I just want to see me as a normal guy. You do not get that privilege. To you, I am not a normal guy. I am your god.”

Steve snorted, crossing his arms and leaning dramatically against the wall of the elevator.

They’d come down to the police station to work on getting Avengers clearances for one of their Thanos contingency plans. There was a lot they still didn’t know and even more that they could do nothing about but Tony had started working on systems of evacuation and defense that he needed a lot of tech and a lot of crossing international borders for.

Steve had gone with him so they could put up a united front. The Avengers were Back and ready to Take Down Evil and Need Your Support so Please Do What We Say.

It was still a slow process; this was their third time coming to the police building that month. Tony had made an innocuous comment about the shitty elevator last visit.

And, you know, Murphy’s Law.

Tony swore, shaking out his hand. It looked like his nail had bent back.

“Don’t you have any of your fancy gadgets that could break that open?”

Tony turned another heated glare on him. “I checked all Iron Man tech at the door in an effort of good will.”

Steve raised an eyebrow. “You didn’t sneak anything in? It’s not like they would know.”

Tony opened his mouth before closing it and taking a deep breath through his nose.

“Good. Will.” He ground out, through gritted teeth. “I’m a man of my word. Trying to be honorable , here.”

Steve’s head jerked back. Sounded to him like Tony was implying he, Steve, wasn’t honorable. Which was complete horse-shit.

But before Steve could snipe back, Tony stood up, gesturing to the panel. “It’s not like you had to check your super strength at the door so could you give me a hand, here?”

Steve scowled, but crouched by the control panel. He felt along the edges, finding a weak spot, and dug in his finger to pry it open.

He bent the metal. That was going to be harder to put back.

Tony seemed to agree because he took another hard breath through his nose.

“Whatever. Fine. If they didn’t want their control panel fucked with, they shouldn’t have such a shitty elevator.”

He pushed Steve out of the way to have better access to the circuit board and Steve felt the touch like a brand.

Tony was always so full of passion and fury. So was Steve. It’s why they butted heads so much. But sometimes, Steve thought there might be something else to the passion and fury.

Steve stood back up to watch Tony work, leaning against the opposing wall of the elevator. Tony was glaring at the circuits through a hologram projecting on his phone. He tapped at some of the scrolling numbers and reached around the light to tweak a wire here and there.

“Thought you said you didn’t bring tech in.”

Tony growled deep in his throat. “No weapons . Nothing that could have helped me force the panel open. Shut up, I’m working.”

Steve turned his head to hide a smirk.

Tony did something then did something else and then a bunch of numbers and letters started scrolling very fast and Tony stood up, joining Steve against the elevator wall with a groan.

“Give up?” Steve asked.

Tony closed his eyes. “Friday’s running a couple diagnostics and trying to access the motor controls for the building. Fuck you.”

Steve smirked fully now. He slid along the wall so he could nudge Tony with his shoulder.

“Letting your robot do the work?”

Tony’s eyes were still closed. He let out a pained sigh. “She’s not a robot which you know because I’ve told you that at least 300 times. But, yes, Rogers, we do let robots do our work for us. That is literally why they were invented.”

Tony didn’t move away from Steve’s shoulder.

Before what the news cycle called the “Civil War”, this kind of thing had happened all the time. Steve would make sarcastic comments about Tony’s reliance on technology and Tony would take shots at Steve for being old and stuck in his ways. It had been friendly. Schoolyard shenanigans. Maybe a little pigtail pulling.

It hadn’t been as friendly lately but Tony’s shoulder still pressed to Steve’s bicep gave him a little bit of hope.

“Nothing wrong with a little bit of elbow grease, Tones. Rolling up your sleeves and doing the work yourself. That’s what your dad used to do.”

Tony’s eyes shot open, the comment about his dad the trigger pulled.

“All right, dick. You can stop pretending like you knew my father. You knew him for, what, a year in his 20s? I knew him how he actually was. He started all of the robot shit. If he could have built a robot to raise me instead of doing it himself he would have. So you can take your whole ‘what your father would have done’ bullshit and shove it because you didn’t know him. You barely know me or my work. So keep your goddamn holier-than-thou anti-technology commentary to yourself. In fact,” Tony’s voice became low and dangerous. “I’d prefer if you stopped talking altogether.”

When Tony looked at him, Steve saw fire. There was a cruel tilt to his mouth and a challenge in his eyes.

Steve leaned in.

Tony leaned away “Whoa. What the fuck?”

Steve blinked. “What?”

“Did you just try to kiss me?” The incredulousness in Tony’s face made Steve take one physical and several mental steps back.

“What?”

Tony leaned his own body back as if trying to take in Steve in the context of what had almost just happened. “Did you go in for a kiss just now? Really?”

Steve shrugged, putting on an effective air of nonchalance. “Wasn’t that where we were going?” He puts on a smirk with only half the confidence he’d felt when he leaned in the first place. “That’s how this usually goes, right? All the fighting and pigtail pulling and now we’re stuck in an elevator together?” He shrugged again. “I’ve seen the movies.”

Tony bleated a laugh, an unattractive sound. Steve’s not sure he’s ever heard Tony laugh so unrestrainedly before.

Tony put his hands on his forehead, pushing his hair back. “Oh my God, there is so much wrong with so much of what you just said. Starting with you saying you’ve ‘seen movies’.”

Steve scoffed, crossing his arms. “I’ve definitely seen movies. Nat’s been showing me.”

Tony waved him off, not bothering to entertain that line of conversation.

“That isn’t this, pal. We’re not that. I genuinely don’t like you.”

Steve rolled his eyes, slumping back against the wall again. This time Tony did move away.

“Yeah, okay,” Steve started. “Fury always said we fight like an old married couple.”

Tony shook his head. “No. Not that. Not even a little bit.” He took a deep breath and moved to stand in front of Steve, putting his hands on his shoulders and looking him in the eye. “Rogers. Steve. I need you to hear me when I say this. Are you listening?”

Steve nodded, his eyes jumping back to Tony’s mouth.

Tony smacked him weakly upside the head. “No. None of that. Look at my eyes, I need you to listen to me.”

Steve looked at Tony’s eyes. He couldn’t help but feel like this was a little romantic.

Until Tony, looking him in the eye, said, “I don’t like you. You’re mean to me, and not in a fun way. I’m working with you literally under threat of Thanos killing off half of the universe. I would not choose to be in your company if not for that.” He let go of Steve and took a step back. “You’re a bitch.”

And then he moved away, turning back to the control panel.

Steve just watched him, completely speechless, as a bunch of beeps and other mechanical sounds came from Tony’s devices. It took until Tony had worked out the problem with the elevator shuddering back into motion for Steve to ask, “What?”

Tony shrugged, closing the panel as much as he could with the dented door. “I thought we were on the same page here. I mean you did completely betray me and leave me to go and defend your buddy who killed my parents. And that was after he tried to shoot me in the face.”

“He was brainwashed ,” Steve started heatedly.

But Tony cut him off. “Yeah, and I’m using B.A.R.F. to help fix him, but getting you to let me in on that was like pulling teeth. If it had been up to you, he’d be frozen in Wakanda or something.”

Steve tried to open his mouth to defend himself again but Tony wasn’t hearing it.

“So I thought you’d made it clear to me that we weren’t friends. Why the fuck would we be anything else?”

Their elevator arrived at the ground floor and Tony was back to being all smiley once the doors opened. He charmed and schmoozed the people on the desk, apologizing for the door to the control panel and ‘I’d be happy to do a full mechanical upgrade on the building. No, really! How can we expect you to do your jobs with unreliable equipment?’

Steve tried to turn on his Captain America persona, afraid of appearing harder to work with than Tony Stark, but he was never a very good actor. He was feeling put out and unhappy and out of sorts and he knew he looked it. Most of the employees didn’t make eye contact with him as he and Tony left.

When they made it to the front steps outside the building, Tony tossed Steve the keys to the rental car they’d driven to the station.

“I don’t want to ride back with you,” he said plainly, lifting up his shirt to put the Iron Man core back to his chest where the arc reactor used to be. “So you can drive home, and I–” he pressed the mechanism and the Iron Man suit started forming around him. “-will find my own way back.”

Steve looked at the keys, his face screwed up in consternation. “Tony, wait,” he tried.

“No,” Tony said instead, moving into a crouch for takeoff, “I don’t think I will.”

“There’s really nothing here?” Steve tried anyway, not one to back down.

Tony came out of his crouch, his faceplate coming up to give Steve an almost pitying look. “No, Steve. There’s nothing there. A) Because I don’t like you and B) because I’m aro as fuck.”

Steve growled in exasperation. “Come on, Stark, you’re being difficult on purpose. What does that even mean ???”

Steve caught another of Tony’s eyerolls before the faceplate came back over his face.

“Bitch.” Tony said, and then took off.

Steve didn’t want to tell anyone about it. It was embarrassing and he still wasn’t entirely sure what had even happened.

But… he really didn’t know what the fuck had happened. He needed help.

He considered confiding in Bucky or Sam but Bucky was already going through his own thing and with Sam, sometimes it got to be a kind of echo chamber. Sam probably wouldn’t see the situation any differently than Steve did.

Natasha was an option but a) she was never as straightforward as Steve needed her to be and b) she would laugh at him. And tell everyone. For a super spy, she really was all too happy to tell Steve’s embarrassing secrets.

And, anyway, this was about Tony first and foremost. Steve hadn’t done anything wrong on his end – it was because Tony was ‘aro as fuck’, whatever that meant, that he’d rejected Steve. So Steve had to talk to someone who knew Tony and, therefore, knew what the fuck that meant.

Pepper was out. She and Tony had gone through some kind of split and were on a break or something. At least that’s what Tony had said. She’d probably know the most about what Tony had meant about being aro and how that related to not wanting to kiss Steve but he doubted she was willing to share. Also, she scared Steve, just a little.

Steve approached Colonel Rhodes at the compound. Rhodes was still working on walking, the electronic braces Tony had built helping him regain mobility, but Rhodes’s movements weren’t fluid yet. He was in the med bay, working in the PT room, when Steve found him. Steve tried not to feel like he was cornering him where he couldn’t get away.

He stood a few steps away from where Rhodes walked between the bars – hands not touching them, but hovering over in case he needed the help. There was no one spotting him which was lucky as Steve wasn’t sure he wanted an audience.

He crossed his arms and leaned against the doorway, affecting an air of casualness he didn’t feel, letting Rhodes walk toward him.

“You’re progressing really well,” Steve told him. “You should be proud.”

Rhodes rolled his eyes, taking a pause at the end of the walkway to hold onto the bars and take a breath. “I am proud. So I’m going to ignore how condescending that sounded.”

Steve held up a hand. “Sorry. I didn’t mean–”

“I know you didn’t, Cap,” Rhodes interrupted, smiling. This was already going better than Steve had expected. “What’s up?”

Steve took a breath, recrossing his arms. They were most comfortable that way. “I’m worried about Tony.”

Rhodes immediately stood up straighter, his shoulders coming back to military position. “Why? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, he’s fine, I think.” Steve sighed leaning a little bit back onto his heels. “Do you know what aro is?”

Rhodes snorted, his shoulders slumping in relief. “Yeah, fucking Tony.” He chuckled before his head jerked back up, his eyes gone a bit wide. “Wait, did you make a move on him?”

Steve’s arms tightened, his own eyes widening slightly. He hadn’t expected Rhodes to make that leap. He cleared his throat, “Why would you think–”

“You did .” Rhodes interrupted again. “You definitely did. Oh my God.” Rhodes face was spreading in a smile. “Oh my God . This is amazing.”

Steve huffed a bit, refusing to get sidetracked. “What does aro mean? Why would Tony tell me that?”

“Well I’m assuming it’s so you would leave him alone when he told you he didn’t like you.” Rhodes said, laughing under his breath. “I’m guessing you were persistent?”

Steve flexed his shoulder, refusing to answer that. “So it was an excuse?”

“No, it’s true. Tony Stark is aro as fuck .” Rhodes grinned. “But that’s not why he turned you down, whatever move you made. He just doesn’t like you.”

Steve grunted. Yes, Rhodes, he’d made that very clear. “What does aro mean?”

Rhodes shrugged, moving backwards down the padded walkway He looked down at his feet to watch his legs move awkwardly under the different kind of mobility required. “It’s short for aromantic. You can google it.” He looked up at Steve then. “Do not bother Tony about it. Leave him alone, Rogers.”

Steve sighed. “You can’t just tell me?”

Rhodes grinned at him. “Nah. You’re a smart guy – you figure it out.”

Going to Rhodes had been a mistake. Not only because he didn’t actually get any useful information out of it, but the Colonel had also told everyone that Steve had made a move on Tony.

And everyone had found that so hilarious.

Steve had hoped Colonel Rhodes would have a little more professionalism and respect but, no, he told Happy who told Peter who told everyone , because that sticky teenager lived to, as he put, “roast America’s ass”.

Natasha kept moving boxes of tissues closer to Steve whenever Tony walked away from him. Vision had taken to playing “Careless Whisper” every time Steve entered a room. Bruce only ever looked at him now with a mix of pity and amusement which, when taken with the other things wasn’t so dramatic, but was definitely the most annoying.

He had googled ‘aromantic’ like Rhodes had suggested (Googling just ‘aro’ had done him no good previously as he’d been spelling it like ‘arrow’) but the results didn’t clear up too much.

“ An aromantic person is someone who doesn't experience romantic attraction. There's no need for an aromantic to pair up with another person for romantic reasons.”

But Tony had a whole slew of conquests in the past. He was famous for it. And he’d had a relationship with Pepper that was definitely more serious than the others – a romantic relationship! They had been a couple! Steve had followed the relationship from when he and Tony had met to when Tony had told them they were seperated in that conference room in Bucharest. Not that he had schemes on Tony, he was just interested in his friends.

But Tony had been in a romantic relationship and Google said that’s not what aro means. Had Tony been lying?

He thought about this every time he saw Tony walk in somewhere with Bruce tucked under his arm. He watched Tony kiss Bruce or Pepper on the cheek, heard him call people pet names like ‘dear’ or ‘honey’ or ‘sweetheart’. None of it was adding up.

It was during an Avengers Sponsored Social Charity Event – one of the efforts being made to regain the trust and faith of the public – that Steve all but convinced himself that aromanticism was fake and Tony had lied to him completely. He watched Tony slowly guide Pepper around a dance floor, a tasteful but sparkly ring on her left hand. They hadn’t officially told the rest of the team yet, but it was clear the couple were back together and now, somehow, engaged.

That is extremely romantic behavior. Marriage? Romantic.

Steve grit his teeth, his narrowed eyes locked on them as they made their way across the floor. His arms were folded so tightly it was unlikely they’d ever hang loose again.

A shorter figure slid up next to Steve, chewing sounds coming from his open mouth. “They’re cute, right?”

Steve glanced down at Peter, wearing his Spider-Man suit under his tuxedo in an effort to preserve his identity, but with his mask rolled up to expose his mouth so he could inhale the party’s hors d'oeuvres. He’d somehow procured an entire tray.

Steve just grunted in reply.

Peter popped another mini crabcake into his mouth and talked around it. Teenagers were gross.

“Yeah, Tony and Pepper make a good team. Very solid support system.” He popped another crabcake into his mouth despite not having yet swallowed the first. “She would never blame him for an international incident and then leave him to deal with the fallout in the press, including the revision of official security government documents, by himself.”

Steve glared down at the masked hero. Peter just licked grease off the fingers of his gloves. “You got something to say, kid?”

Peter shrugged, throwing a ball of crab up in the air to catch in his mouth. “I’m just saying,” he said around it. “No one who’s ever done any of those things should presume they’re entitled to any relationship with Mr. Stark. How messed up would that be? I mean could you imagine?”

Steve gaped, watching Peter dip a jumbo shrimp into some kind of white sauce. He wasn’t sure he could recall the kid ever being so disrespectful.

“You think I feel entitled ?”, he asked, annoyed at how petulant he sounded.

Steve couldn’t see through the mask, but he could guess by the bottom half of Peter’s face he was raising an eyebrow. “Which answer gets you to stop glaring at Mr. Stark like that?”

“I wasn’t–” but Steve stopped himself, because he definitely had been.

Peter smirked. “Look, Captain,” Steve was a little gratified that Peter was respectful enough not to call him Rogers like Tony did. “This whole Edward Cullen, lurking in corners and glaring menacingly at the one you adore act isn’t working for anyone.” Steve didn’t know who Edward Cullen was but he wasn’t going to bring it up. Not when he’d told Tony he’d seen movies. “It’s better if you just leave him alone.”

Steve refrained from throwing up his hands but barely. “Why does everyone keep saying that?”

That got a laugh out of Peter. “Have you thought that maybe if everyone agrees on something it’s probably true?” Then Peter’s face pulled into a grimace. “Well… considering everyone that agreed on the Accords, I guess you wouldn't, huh?”

Steve scowled at Peter. The kid had an attitude problem – Tony couldn’t be a good influence on him.

“He still didn’t have to lie to me,” Steve grumbled.

“About what?” Peter asked, fishing a stray scallop out of the dip with his still-gloved pinky. He was going to have to wash the suit, that was so gross.

Steve twisted his face, unsure if this was appropriate to bring up with a kid. He knew times were different and Peter probably knew more about all this than he did, but he still didn’t feel comfortable discussing the romantic life of someone the kid considered a parental figure.

“Just… something he told me,” Steve hedged. “When he, uh–”

“Totally rejected you?” Peter asked, innocently.

Steve grit his teeth. “Yes. That.”

Peter nodded, popping the scallop in his mouth and chewing. Then he stopped, actually swallowing before he spoke. “Wait, is this about him being aro?”

Steve grunted. Of course Tony’s protege knew about his romantic life. Why would Tony think it’s inappropriate to share something like that with a kid?

“Mr. Stark wouldn’t lie about something like that!” Peter’s voice was getting louder, spurred by a sudden outrage. “Why do you think he lied about that?”

Steve refused to answer. He would not bitch out a fifteen-year-old.

“Do you even know what it means? Mr. Rhodey told me you asked about it. You know how to Google, right?”

“ Yes, I know how to Google,” Steve snapped. “And it said there was no reason for people who were aromantic to pair up.” He gestured to Tony and Pepper, hands clasped and slowly spinning. He was trying to say ‘They’re a couple! So ha!’ without actually saying it. It seemed a bit juvenile to say it aloud.

Even not saying it aloud must have seemed juvenile to Peter because he rubbed a hand down his face, bringing the mask back down over his mouth with it. “Oh my God , you’re so old.”

“Hey,” Steve started but Peter held up a hand to cut him off.

“No, I know, you were stuck in the ice or whatever, and there’s been a lot to catch up on. I’m not mad, I’m just frustrated. But I’d rather it be me explaining this to you than you going to bother Mr. Stark about it.”

Steve still felt indignant – why did people believe he would bother Stark? – but it looked like he was finally getting an explanation so he valiantly kept his mouth shut.

Peter quietly flagged down a waiter and passed him the mostly empty tray, thanking him politely. He shook out his arms, turning back to Steve. “I don’t know why, I just felt like I needed my hands for this.”

Steve crossed his arms and waited.

Peter sighed. “So aromanticism is a lack of romantic attraction.”

Steve nodded. He knew that already.

“Which means Mr. Stark doesn’t get the mushy feelings or feel butterflies and all the good soft shit that comes with being in a relationship.”

Steve almost said ‘language’ but heroically resisted.

“ But ,” he said “Mr. Stark still has a lot of love in his heart and was critically under-hugged as a kid so he always makes sure to show his love like that. He’s… what did MJ call it…” Peter waved his hands around his head as if trying to catch the word he was looking for out of his brain. He snapped his fingers but it was muffled by the gloved of the suit. “Tactile!”

Steve nodded, remembering all the times Tony used to clap him on the shoulder or offer him snacks. Before, he’d used that as evidence for why he and Tony were headed somewhere romantic. But, if he’d really been paying attention, he’d have realized Tony did that for everyone.

“Full disclosure: I’m not aro and do not speak for all aros. Every aro is different, blah blah blah, disclaimer disclaimer.” Peter waved his hands, vaguely, making Steve glad he’d given the tray back. “You’re not going to find every aro is so free with cheek smooches.”

Steve nodded, his mind conjuring all those instances again of Tony pet-naming Rhodey or cheek-smooching Bruce. It put to mind something he’d read when he’d googled ‘aromantic’, but hadn’t really thought much about:

“Aromantics are capable of feeling love - platonic love such as that between a mother and child or best friends is still love.”

Wording it like that made it seem so obvious to Steve: of course aromantic people could feel love. It was a basic human emotion! Anyone who couldn’t feel love was a sociopath and Steve didn’t think Tony was a sociopath.

And even beyond that, he knew Tony could love. He saw how he behaved with Rhodes and Happy – the kind of fatherly love he had for Peter.

And Steve guessed Tony could feel platonic love for Pepper. They may be a couple – an engaged couple – and Pepper could feel romantically about him, but Tony’s feelings could be totally platonic.

But– “Then why is he marrying her?” Steve asked, hoping he sounded more confused than whiney.

Peter shrugged, the eyes of his mask going a little scrunched as he smiled. “They make a good team,” he said, repeating his earlier sentiment. “They both wanted kids and they take care of each other.” He chuckles under his breath. “Also, I’m pretty sure Tony wants to make sure that Pepper is entitled to half his money.” He shrugged. “It makes sense.”

Steve nodded. He really was starting to feel better about this whole thing.

“I think I’m beginning to understand,” he mused. “Getting married to Pepper isn’t the same thing as making out with me in an elevator.”

Peter burst out laughing. “Oh my God , is that what happened? You tried to make out with him in an elevator?” Peter cackled.

Steve crossed his arms tighter, narrowing his eyes. “Yes, but it’s fine. You just explained–”

“Captain Rogers – Steve – no. Mr. Stark still likes,” he choked a bit on the word, “sex and stuff. He’s aromantic, not asexual. He just doesn’t want to fuck you .”

Now Steve was offended again. He spluttered a bit, trying to find words.

Peter was still laughing but he held up a hand to explain, “Well, some people are aromantic and asexual, but Mr. Stark isn’t. If he liked you, he would have no problem making out with you. He just really doesn’t like you.”

Steve threw up his hands, completely giving up.

He walked out of the ballroom, leaving Peter laughing behind him and Tony dancing, completely oblivious of everything Steve had just learned.

Tony was just out there existing however he goddamn pleased.

Whatever.

#Aspec Fest 2019 #oops I wrote a thing #anti Stony #MCU #aro!Tony #cw: arophobia

23 notes · View notes

blancheludis · 5 years

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A/N: @iron-man-bingo square: Highschool AU

Fandom: Marvel, MCU, Avengers Relationship: Tony Stark/Steve Rogers Tags: No Powers, Highschool, Secret Relationship, Fluff, Humour Words: 6.782

Summary: "You're staring at Tony's ass again." Steve can't help himself. Just like everything else about Tony, it is great. Too bad no one knows they are in a relationship. He has a feeling that no one believes his protest either way.

NEW CHAPTER: After many discussions of Tony's ass, Steve's friends are surprised when Steve actually delivers the goods right to their doorstep.

---

Bucky lives two streets away from Steve. Considering how long they are taking to get there, he could be living in another state. Tony is a nervous mess, stumbling along next to Steve. It had been amusing in the beginning, but now Steve is getting actually concerned whether he made the right decision in bringing Tony here. They might not yet be ready for this. Then again, they could need some more allies, and Tony could need some more friends. Luckily, Steve has the best there are to offer.

“Are you all right?” Steve means his question mostly rhetorically, but Tony whips his head around to him immediately, wearing a grin that is frail at the edges.

“Of course,” Tony replies brightly, nodding with fake enthusiasm. “Just got a little stone in my shoe.”

He points at his feet and makes a show of rattling his shoe. It is just another excuse for him to stop moving. There is no hiding the nervous glance he throws at the road ahead. It is like he expects a physical manifestation of their movie night to run them over.

“They will love you,” Steve says for the hundredth time.

He would never admit it out loud, but he is almost glad that Tony is nervous because it occupies him enough to ignore the worry sitting heavily inside his own stomach. It is not that he thinks his friends will be mean to Tony, but this is still going to change things.

“They barely tolerate me in school,” Tony argues but slowly starts walking again.

At this pace, they might even make it to Bucky’s before the first movie is over.

“In school, you’re more Stark than Tony.” It feels strange to explain it like that, but Tony nods as if it makes sense. If anyone knows about the dichotomy of Tony Stark, it would be Tony himself. “With us, you’re my boyfriend.”

As usual, Tony’s face brightens at that. Less glum than before, he mutters, “This is a bad idea.”

Bucky’s house is coming up. If he manages to keep Tony busy for just another minute, they might just get the worst moment over before Tony realizes what is happening. Tony likes complaining before the fact, but once there is no escaping a situation anymore, he gives it his best.

“I didn’t know you were such a pessimist,” Steve remarks, gently steering Tony towards the left, right towards Bucky’s door. Almost there.

“I’m not,” Tony argues expectedly. When Steve walks a bit faster, he stumbles after him. “I just think we should –”

“We’re here,” Steve cuts him off with a grin. Before Tony can do anything unadvised, Steve leans forward and presses a quick kiss against his lips. Using his momentum, he rings the bell. Louder, he repeats himself. “We’re here.”

The window of the living room is open, so Steve knows they can hear him. It also allows them to witness a crash sounding from inside, followed by muffled cursing. He usually does not ring since he has a key, but he thought it would make things easier for Tony if they did not just burst in.

Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Tony straightening and clenching his jaw as he puts a smile on his face that is just a tad too sharp.

“Who’s we?” Bucky calls. “I hope you didn’t bring a homeless person again. We already have Clint who’ll eat us out of house and home.”

That was one time, and they all knew André. Steve did not bring a complete stranger to his best friend’s house. It is important to help each other out, though. Their neighbourhood has a grim enough reputation already.

Tony stares at Steve. His smile has grown marginally more honest, tinged by amusement. It looks like he is going to ask about Bucky’s comment, but then his face tightens again.

“You didn’t tell them you were bringing me?” Tony hisses. He looks ready to run, so Steve puts an arm around his shoulder.

“You’re welcome either way,” he replies in as soothing a tone as he dares without spooking Tony.

Lips pressed into a thin line, Tony swallows. “What if I’m not?”

Thankfully, Steve does not have to think about his answer at all. “Then we’ll have pizza in that small place around the corner.” He shrugs for good measure, conveying nonchalance even while his tone is firm. “I wanted to take you there anywhere.”

For all the years he has known Tony, it is still a miracle to watch his expression change. Usually, Tony wears masks, smooth and pointed, that are a little bit dangerous even when he is smiling. Now, his worry melts off his face, replaced by something warm and full of wonder, almost as if he did not think that Steve would choose him over his friends.

“What’s taking you so long?” Bucky asks from inside.

Slowly, Steve takes a key out of his pocket and shows it to Tony, giving him another long moment to collect himself. “Ready?” he then asks.

Drumming his fingers against his leg, Tony stares hard at the key before forcing his eyes up at Steve. Then he nods.

Tony feels immediately guilty when relief spreads over Steve’s face. He has not meant to make such a big deal out of this. Only it is one, at least to him. The people waiting inside are not strangers, but they could just as well be. Beyond the occasional nod in school, they have nothing to do with each other – beyond their connection to Steve, which they should not know about.

He just wants this to go well, and not just for Steve’s sake. In the safety of his mind, Tony can admit that he would love to have some more friends. And if not friends, at least some allies. Ever since he got closer to Steve, Tony has not been as lonely anymore, not in the closest sense of the word. On the other hand, though, it has gotten worse. Now he knows what he is missing when he is not together with Steve. Just to have some more friendly faces meeting him would make everything easier.

When the door opens, nothing bad happens. No one has come out to greet them and the hallway looks unthreatening enough. Tony does not have much experience with how a hall is supposed to look, of course, considering the gaping pit of a foyer they have at the mansion. He sees jackets and shoes in different sizes, a small notice board with a shopping list on it as well as a small heart. It is – homely.

“Everything’s going to be all right,” Steve says.

For a moment, Tony wonders whether he should tell him that this is not as reassuring as Steve likely thinks. It just reminds him that there is a chance that things will not be all right. It is like one of those what could go wrong? moments.

Before Tony has a chance to say anything, though, loud footsteps come towards them. They have him jumping as if he has done something wrong. Conditioned reactions like that are annoying. Thankfully, Steve was too distracted by the impending arrival of one of his friends so that he does not notice it.

“Stevie, what’s – Stark?”

Bucky Barnes comes to an abrupt halt in the hallway before them. He is wearing sweatpants and a hoodie, looking altogether much more unrefined than he appears in school. Tony does not think he has ever seen any of them but Steve out of their school uniforms. It somehow makes this real, all of a sudden.

Without another word, Bucky turns around and all but runs back into the direction he came from, not giving either of them the chance to explain.

Steve sighs, which sounds fond more than surprised, and looks apologetically at Tony. “Shall we?”

There is nothing to do but nod. Starks do not run and, in this case, Tony does not either.

They follow after Bucky quick enough to see him skid to a stop right in front of the couch where Clint is sprawling.

“Steve brought Stark,” Bucky exclaims breathlessly. His tone holds a note that Tony cannot possibly interpret, not without knowing any of them better.

Clint’s expression, on the other hand, is easy to identify. His mouth falls open even while his face darkens. “He what?” He is, without doubt, upset.

Feeling his shoulders try to curl in on themselves, Tony straightens his spine again. Once they are out of here, he is kindly going to refrain from saying I told you so to Steve. Mostly because the disappointment is clogging his throat. He never thought this would be easy, but it is infinitely harder to accept that Steve’s plan failed before Tony ever said a single word.

“His name is Tony,” Steve speaks up and takes a step forward. He sounds pleasant enough but there is an edge to the words. Without seeing his face, Tony recognizes the tension easily. It is the same one that comes up whenever they are discussing Howard.

His friends ignore him. Well, Natasha, who is occupying one of the armchairs, is suddenly alert, her eyes are running over Tony’s form as if she wonders about the best way to take him apart.

Bucky, however, does not even look up but holds out his hand, palm up, right under Clint’s nose. “Pay up, Barton.”

Clint’s face, if possible, gets even more strained as he glares at Steve. Leaning forward, he points an accusing finger at them.

“Couldn’t you have waited, like, two more weeks to act on your super obvious crush?” he asks, just short of yelling.

With a sigh like a book falling closed, Steve relaxes. Tony is confused. He has always known that people do not make sense but he usually makes sure that does not pertain him. Now, though, he has hopes running on the outcome of this, and he hates losing.

“On what did you bet, Buck?” Steve asks, moving slightly closer towards Tony so that their shoulders touch. It is probably meant to be reassuring, but just like his words earlier, it falls slightly short. Steve should really work on his communication skills.

Sullenly, Clint pushes Bucky’s hand to the side, causing Bucky to laugh as he shrugs at Steve. “That you’d come to your senses before this term is over and start grabbing that ass,” here he gestures lightly at Tony with a truly shark-like grin, “instead of just ogling it.”

While Tony is still trying to come to terms with the fact that Steve’s friends are apparently not upset about his presence but actually counted on it sooner or later, Steve nods his head. He does not seem surprised by them betting on his love life. If that is a normal occurrence between friends, Tony might have to think about his longing for them again.

“I’m afraid you haven’t won then,” Steve says slowly, his wide grin belying the mocking regret in his tone.

Despite it being unlikely that any of these people will lash out at him, Tony has to fight taking a step back. Nobody likes being told they have lost.

“What?” Bucky narrows his eyes at them. “You’re here. Stark’s here. You’re standing close enough together that one might think you’re permanently attached.”

What has started as a light touch between their shoulders has ended in Tony melting against Steve’s side, be it to get some reassurance or to hide his own tension. He just feels safer with Steve next to him. They do not get to touch each other nearly often enough, always conscious of who might be watching them.

“Tony,” Steve says his name with more sharpness now to remind his friends of the manners they supposedly have, “has been my boyfriend for just over a year now.”

Pandemonium ensues as Bucky and Clint turn to each other, gesturing wildly even as they argue loudly.

“A what?” Clint shrieks. “No way.”

At the same time, Bucky declares loudly, “You’re a terrible liar. You couldn’t have kept this from me.”

Despite the chaos, Tony feels the thick knot of worry sitting in his gut dissolve. Nothing is clear yet. Just because they made a bet about whether or not Steve would be brave enough to ask Tony out does not mean they approve of the relationship or of Tony. It does not mean they are going to get along.

His greatest fear of being thrown right out of Bucky’s house, however, might have just been unfounded. That makes gathering the strength to get through the rest of the night easier.

“I knew.”

Natasha does not raise her voice and still she manages to bring the noise to an abrupt end. Everybody stares at her, Tony included.

Steve did not tell her, he is sure of that. She never showed any sign of knowing. Her eyes never lingered on Tony in school, she never made any kind of comment. Yet neither her tone nor her expression leave any doubt that she is telling the truth.

“Please,” she drawls, a tiny smirk on her lips that makes her look more dangerous than usual, “as if Steve could have fooled me.” The she waves at Clint and Bucky, a lazy gesture that is no less absolute. “I believe you owe me twenty bucks each.”

The boys mutter under their breath, sharing a dark glance. In the face of their defeat, they have forgotten all about their argument just a moment ago.

A tremble runs through Steve at the sight that Tony only belatedly recognizes as silent laughter.

“Even ignoring the fact that you can’t leave well enough alone and bet on my private life,” Steve says, likely aiming for a chiding tone but ends up sounding amused, “but you really bet against Natasha?”

From the sounds of it, that is the height of stupidity. Admittedly, even without knowing her beyond being in class together, Tony thinks this is common sense. Anyone who looks like they are not just ready to but already have murdered someone while clad in the school issued skirt and knee socks is not someone one should slight.

“Well, I mean,” Clint stumbles over the words then gestures aimlessly at them, “it’s you and Stark.”

“Tony,” Steve corrects them for the third time, now with much less patience in his voice.

Then he looks at Tony with concern written all over his face and that is when Tony realizes that he has not said a single word since entering the house. It was not exactly necessary, and Tony tells himself that is the only reason he cannot get his mouth to open.

It is complicated. He has been taught how to charm people, how to spin lies, how to navigate social traps. He knows how to hold all his cards close to his chest, sometimes close enough that not even he himself can see them. At the same time, though, he has never learned to hold an honest conversation without losing himself.

Being introduced to Steve’s friends is only one part of this venture and not even the scariest one. Tony also has to open himself up

Lost in his thoughts, Tony notices only too late that everybody is looking at him now. Only years of trying to keep his composure under scrutiny allow Tony to meet their stares head on.

“What do you even see in him?” Bucky asks.

Ice fills Tony’s inside, spreading slowly until even his toes tingle with it. That is what he has been asking himself for the past year now too. Steve deserves so much better than him and yet he stays.

He does not dare to glance at Steve, can barely stand the way they are still touching anymore. If his friends get Steve to see reason and leave Tony, he is not sure what he is going to do. Sometimes the thought of Steve is the only thing that gets him through his day, through the never-ending work of helping out Stark Industries’ R&D department, through Howard’s endless lectures. Through being Tony Stark.

“Sta-” Bucky interrupts himself when Steve clears his throat. “Tony?”

With effort, Tony looks up and finds curiosity on their faces, a frown on Clint’s and worry on Steve’s. Confused, he realizes the question was meant for him.

What does he see in Steve? The question is both easy and impossible to answer.

His lips pull up into a grin that feels weak but is the best he can manage with how fast his heart is beating. “Should you be asking me that? Aren’t you his friends?” he asks, joking to buy himself some time.

“That’s exactly why I’m wondering,” Bucky shoots back, as amiable as if this is not the first time they have ever had a conversation.

“He’s,” Tony takes a deep breath, wondering how to describe the miracle that is Steve, even while being acutely aware of how close they are, “great.”

Even before the word is completely over his lips, Tony ducks his head. A thousand other things would have been better to describe Steve, more accurate, kinder. Yet, his throat refuses to cooperate. Perhaps it is better that way so he cannot make things worse.

To his utter surprise, Steve’s friends laugh. Bucky bellows loudly, while Clint is closer to howling. Natasha is the most reserved, although her grin might just be more expressive than the boys’ loudness. Even Steve turns to look at him, that quiet amusement on his face that Tony loves.

“Look at that,” Clint drawls when they have calmed down. He is smirking but it does not make him look mean. “They are already taking on each other’s characteristics. Steve’s turned more daring and St- Tony’s stopped being eloquent.”

Nobody has ever described Tony as eloquent before. That it comes from Clint of all people makes it mean more. At his side, Steve presses into him more firmly for a minute. Tony knows what that is supposed to mean. If they think he is talking much at school, they have never heard him go on about something he loves. They are not yet at the point where Tony dares to hope that, one day, they will.

“Well,” Bucky claps his hands and lets himself fall back onto the couch, immediately putting his feet up in Clint’s lap. Who lets it happen without much of a reaction at all. “Are you coming in or what?”

They are still standing merely a foot from the door, Tony realizes with a start. Reminded of that, he thinks he is going to feel embarrassment creeping up on him or new terror. Instead, he looks at Bucky’s face and then meets Steve’s asking glance with a smile.

If they are asking him in, they cannot have that badly an opinion of him. Perhaps Steve was right all along and everything is truly going to be all right.

Walking the halls of the school always feels a bit like navigating a minefield. Tony has a reputation to uphold and expectations to meet. Being tired and distracted, thinking back to the movie night with Steve’s friends, does not help with keeping up the act of being the one and only Stark in the school.

Bruce takes one look at him and asks what happened. Luckily, Tony has more than enough experience in changing the topic to something science-related that keeps them occupied for a while. Still, if Bruce notices that Tony is different, someone more observant certainly could too.

Nothing actually happened. On the contrary. Tony feels like his bones are humming with a kind of energy he has never felt before. It is a curious warmth, mixed with a content so deep he is afraid of it, and just a hint of expecting his doom. It feels a bit like falling in love all over again, those first trepidation meetings with a new crush wanting to turn into something more.

“All right,” Bruce snaps next to him, ripping him out of his thoughts, “what’s wrong with you?”

A giggle rises up in Tony’s throat, but he pushes it down just as it reaches his lips. It would take them weeks to iterate all of what is wrong with him. Instead, he says, “Nothing,” and pointedly looks at their chemistry book waiting between them.

“You are fiddling and distracted,” Bruce replies dryly, looking at Tony over the rim of his glasses. “You made a beginners’ mistake in an equation last class.”

Tony frowns, fighting down the urge to take out his Maths book and find the alleged mistake. Tingly feeling aside, he cannot afford getting sloppy. Someone less kind than Bruce will notice that.

“What kind of mistake?” Tony asks, although he knows the only thing that matters is that it happened at all.

“The kind you’d never make if everything was all right.” Bruce rolls his eyes, and Tony both loves and hates him for his insistence.

They do not have much to do together outside of school, with both of them carrying their own problems. Tony guesses it is not obvious for outsiders but he recognizes some of the same behavioural patterns in Bruce as in himself. Where Tony is flashy and loud, Bruce is, of course, withdrawn, keeping to himself. Yet they both flinch at sudden loud noises. They both wear long sleeves at times even when it gets unbearably hot outside. Last year, Tony had given Bruce an expensive but very effective concealer for Christmas, which had not raised any of the questions someone unfamiliar with hiding bruises would ask. They have never talked about it, but they stick together in their own way. There is comfort in that too.

“I think I made some friends,” Tony blurts out. He tells himself he does it mostly to keep Bruce from worrying. Even if they avoid the topic of their home lives, they care.

A smile lights up Bruce’s face, making him look even softer. “Rogers’ gang?” he then asks, complete with a smug little grin when Tony stares at him in incomprehension.

How has everybody known about this without them noticing? First Steve’s friends’ ridiculous bet, now Bruce who acts like there is nothing strange about Tony hanging out with one of the most notable groups in the school.

Instead of wasting time on denials – he has already decided to clue Bruce in – Tony pushes the chemistry book away from them and half-leans, half-sprawls over the desk to better look at Bruce.

“How?” he asks simply, wondering whether he has truly become this obvious.

“You’ve been making moon eyes at Rogers for a year now,” Bruce answers, rolling his eyes at the ridiculousness of the question, “and this morning Romanoff nodded at you.”

That had been weird, Natasha greeting him with the barest tilt of her lips that he is quickly beginning to realize is a smile. It had also been so subtle that there is no way a casual observer would have noticed. It makes him sad for a moment that Bruce has needed to learn how to watch people this closely too.

Natasha nodding at him is actually a pretty damning piece of evidence. She is usually aloof and distant, doing her classwork but otherwise keeping as much out of the inner mechanisms happening at the school as possible. Clint and she are usually glued together, but it is not wrong to view the whole group as a unit.

“She did that,” Tony admits slowly. Taking a leap, he adds, “You should come meet them. They are awesome.”

More so, they are still a social disaster waiting to happen, but Tony would like Bruce to come with him for more than just his ability to mediate. They are friends too, if on a mostly scientific level.

He knows Bruce will withdraw before he ever sees the signs. “I don’t think that’s such a good idea,” Bruce cautions, eyes hooded and hands out of sight. He is very still as if he expects Tony to lash out of him for his refusal.

They are friends, yes, but nothing is perfect.

Tony makes a show of shrugging, glancing down at the text they are supposed to be working through. “I’m not pushing you, but from what I’ve gleaned they are good people.” He is biased, of course, considering he loves Steve and wants them to be good.

Bruce raises his eyebrows at him, lips pursed in something that is not quite a smile but still full of fondness. “You know that from what, one meeting?”

Here it is, another deciding moment, where Tony could blunder through a lie or tell the truth. It is not actually a question. If Bruce had asked before now, Tony probably would have told him directly. He is not reasonably convinced that they are close enough for Bruce not to sell his secrets to the first desperate reporter willing to buy. More than that, though, he knows that Bruce does not like attention, and dropping the bomb that Tony Stark is apparently gay will come with a lot of attention for everyone even marginally involved. Even if he started only a rumour, it would come back to him at some point.

“I know that from dating Steve for a year now,” Tony explains simply as if there is nothing to it. As if they have not done their best to keep this secret for this entire year. “Since they are his friends, they must be good.”

He feels Bruce’s eyes on him. It is a fleeting thing since Bruce takes the news with nothing more than a smile and acceptance. “A year?” he asks, cocking his head to the side. “I’d have guessed half of that at the most.”

Tony probably should not take this as a compliment, but it is hard not to. It is still frustrating to see how bad Steve and he actually are at keeping up appearances. At this point, it is pure luck that Howard has not yet sniffed out the truth. “What tipped you off? Tell me it was Steve. He’s such a bad liar.”

There is no good answer here. If Tony has been slacking, he needs to get back on his game as quickly as possible, lest his performance starts lacking in other, more immediately destructive venues like at home or during press conferences. If it is Steve, Tony has the thankless task of trying to teach his boyfriend how to keep his emotions in check. It has been a year and they have gotten nowhere on that front.

“Oh, he is, but it was you actually,” Bruce says, going for the third, even worse option that they have both messed up. “He could have just had a crush on you, but you’ve never stopped watching him too.” Expression turning amused, Bruce adds, “And you’re pushing out your butt in his direction every chance you get. That’s – pretty telling.”

Tony groans, then twists his head around to glean a glance down his back. “Why does everybody notice my ass?” he asks, only half-complaining.

“Don’t worry,” Bruce says, looking too, “it’s passable.”

In that moment, Tony realizes what a tragedy it is that not more people witness Bruce like this. The snarky attitude he somehow packs into his frail body, the immediate, witty come-backs. Bruce is a wonderful person, and some days Tony wants to wage a war against the people who try to teach him otherwise.

“Passable?” he cries out, much too loud for the classroom but that has never stopped him before. “That’s blasphemy.”

Bruce’s reply gets cut off by their teacher deciding that they are disrupting the class too much. “Mr. Stark, Mr. Banner, stop talking.” Tony notices that the sharpness accompanying his name softens with Bruce’s. He is all right with that.

Tony manages to keep his mouth shut for all of ten seconds before he turns back towards Bruce.

“You should think about it,” he says, not much quieter than before. “Meeting them, I mean. It’s good to have someone in your corner.”

They look at each other for a long moment, which is the closest they have ever come to admitting that they need someone in their corner. Finally, Bruce does a weird combination of a nod and a shrug.

“I’ll let you test the waters for a bit longer,” he replies, all but agreeing. “If you’re still in one piece next month, I’ll consider it.”

That is as close to victory as Tony will come, and he is satisfied with that. Bruce and he are friends not because they push each other but because they know when to back off. That is certainly not a trait anyone would suspect Tony Stark of having, but it has served them well.

“Great.” Tony nods and pushes the chemistry book to the far edge of the table. “Now tell me about that mistake I supposedly made in Maths.”

If Steve had not been busy staring at his boyfriend, he might have been able to avert the disaster Clint is making of their secret arrangement only days after they have made it. In his defence, Tony does not exactly get any less distracting.

“Stark,” Clint calls through the cafeteria, loudly. “Over here.”

He sees Tony look up in confusion, searching for whoever would want his attention. Several things happen when he finds Clint waving at him. His eyes flicker over to Steve, an obvious question in them even while his face smooths over, turning into a facsimile of nonchalance. Steve knows him well enough to recognize the trepidation underneath.

“For the last time,” he hisses at Clint, wishing they would not be so difficult about this, “his name is -”

“Tony, we know.” Clint has the audacity to roll his eyes. “Just keeping up appearances.”

Across from them, Bucky grins. It is unfortunate that Natasha is not yet here, because she is the only on able to keep Clint in check. Then again, she is usually on his side.

“Also,” Clint adds, “I’ve known him for just one night and haven’t been making out with him behind the changing rooms for a year. We’re not yet on first name basis.”

“Careful,” Bucky chimes up, too amused for it to be actually in Steve’s defence. “You’re sounding jealous there.”

“Of what?” Clint asks, glaring.

As one, they turn to look at Tony and Clint hums when Bucky makes an unmistakeable gesture around Tony’s middle section.

“That a–” Bucky falls abruptly silent when Tony arrives at their table, putting so much effort into looking innocent that Clint bodges up his own attempt and starts laughing.

“Don’t stop talking on my behalf,” Tony says, and Steve is sure only he is able to hear the slight tremble in his tone, hidden well beneath casual nonchalance.

“Ignore them,” Steve cuts in before his friends decide to actually pick up their conversation again. “They were talking about your ass again.” He is not sure why he says that, but he needs to reassure Tony somehow and that is the easiest way.

“We didn’t mention anyone’s ass with a single word,” Clint protests immediately, although he shares a rather obvious grin with Bucky. “Just because you can’t think of anything else anymore –”

“Yes, yes.” Steve thinks they should not blame him for that. Everything about Tony is gorgeous, his mind and laugh and body. Even after a year, he is still mesmerized each day anew. “Sit down, Tony.”

Tony’s reluctance does not surprise him, but the sheer uncertainty on his face breaks Steve’s heart a little.

“Are we doing this now? Eating together?” Tony asks. His voice is a little bit too sharp to sound unconcerned. “What happened to keeping this a secret?”

In a way, Steve wishes he had never convinced Tony that things would be better if they just kept silent about their relationship. He still stands by his decision to make sure Howard Stark does not find out, but it also feels like he has made it impossible for Tony to completely believe in them being together. They are all waiting for the other shoe to drop, only that it is different shoes. Steve is waiting for Howard to ruin everything, while Tony waits for Steve to dump him – even though he has no plans of ever doing that.

Before he can say anything reassuring, Clint uses his chance to make another quip. “You mean the way you and Steve managed so well to keep your eyes off each other at all times?”

The thing about Clint is to learn that, even though his tone usually has an edge to it, he mostly does not mean anything by it. While Tony is perhaps more sensitive than other people – albeit he is also better at hiding it – he is almost more perceptive.

“You didn’t know anything concrete, so I’d say we didn’t do too bad a job.”

He is still standing awkwardly in front of their table, hands clenched around the straps of his bag. Steve has to fight the urge to pull him down, right next to him so they will touch and reassure each other.

“We thought your father will surely not say anything against you having friends,” Bucky speaks up, sounding just casual enough to make it believable that he knows nothing about Tony’s home life.

Just like Steve, Bucky had been full of conviction that they need to do something about Howard Stark when Steve told him about his suspicions and the few facts he managed to glean from Tony. There is the ever constant threat of disinheritance or, at the very least, another change of school if Howard finds out about Tony’s relationship. Apparently, gay heirs are bad publicity. More pressing are the bruises Tony does his best to hide but that Steve catalogues with ever-increasing worry.

He had to talk to someone about it, and Bucky had naturally been his first choice. Best friends for as long as they can remember. If they cannot trust each other, they cannot trust anyone.

At some point, Steve knows, things will come to a head, but he would prefer that to be on their own terms, on Tony’s terms. At the very least, he should be of age already and not dependant on his father.

“I don’t really do friends,” Tony replies dryly, a myriad of reasons hidden in his tone. He also sends a brief glare in Steve’s direction, conveying that he suspects Steve has talked to Bucky.

“Then I suggest you start right now,” Bucky says lightly, unfazed by Tony’s frown. “If you’re friends with us, no one will bat an eye if you spend time with Steve.”

Steve could kiss Bucky for this argument. Not the words themselves, he could have delivered them too, but the nonchalance he puts into them, that quiet resignation to a fact. It is hard to argue with that.

“He and Buck also do that manly man-hug,” Clint throws in with a ready grin, “so you’ve got a free pass for constant touching too. Everybody knows that Steve is handsy.”

The line of Tony’s shoulders relaxes marginally, so Steve thinks they are on a good path. Because it is required of him and will put Tony more at ease, Steve throws up his hands in the air and says, “I’m not handsy.”

With a sigh that is at least half-full of content, Tony finally lets himself fall into a seat at the table. In fact, he manages to push the chair just so that he comes to rest close enough to Steve that they can bump shoulders while he settles. Under the table, their thighs automatically come to rest against each other. It feels like coming home.

“You are,” Tony says with a shrug, grinning up at him. “And I love it, but you really have a thing about forgetting other people’s personal space.”

Steve has a thousand arguments against that, and all of them end with Tony sprawling over him on the couch or a park bench or the naked floor, or Tony leaning against him while they walk, or brushing imagined dust off Steve’s lapels. When it comes to being handsy, Tony is the unchallenged king of it.

“Well,” Steve says unapologetically, “if it gives us an excuse to touch.”

“We just have to go somewhere no one can see,” Tony says, then his expression turns wicked. “Did I tell you that I’m working on procuring the key to Fury’s office? He doesn’t have any cameras in there. And that leather chair looks nice.”

Having to imagine that, Steve feels his cheeks heating up. He likes to think that, before Tony, he was not so ready for debauchery and mayhem. In fact, he had principles. It is not that he misses them if it means he can have Tony instead, but it sometimes feels like life was easier back then, less carefully balanced on the edge to disaster.

“I like you,” Clint exclaims loudly before Steve has the chance to formulate a response. “It’s done, we’re friends.” He makes a show of it, but his eyes are earnest, always up to mischief. “Tell me when you get that key.” To Steve, he adds, “I promise I won’t watch, but I’ve always wanted to have a look around in there.”

Contrary to how a normal person would react – with embarrassment, shock, concern – Tony looks at Clint with gleaming eyes. He likes to complain about Clint’s utter lack of tact, but now, confronted with him as a sort of ally, Tony must realize that he will always have a co-conspirator for all of his bad ideas.

“You’re in that office every week,” Bucky says dryly. “Surely you’ve seen enough.”

With a huff, Clint turns on Bucky, looking at him as if he has grown a second head. “Have you seen that desk? It totally looks like it’s got some secret compartments.”

Before Clint can launch into another story of how he thinks that Fury is a retired secret agent or a not-so-retired secret agent hiding from his enemies at their school, Steve nudges Tony’s shoulder.

“He likes conspiracies,” he explains with a grimace, “I’m sorry.”

Tony looks thoroughly amused, however. “Don’t be,” he says, then adds in a stage whisper, “If you’re too chicken to make out in Fury’s office, I’ll go with Clint.”

Steve looks between his friends. “This is such a bad idea.” He wishes Natasha were here. She would knock some sense into the boys’ heads without hesitation.

“I think this is the best idea anyone’s had around here in a long while,” Clint predictably argues, grinning at Tony as if he has found the Holy Grail.

“No,” Steve tries again, despite knowing this is a battle he has already lost. His only hope is that Tony does not actually have Fury’s key, although that is only a question of time. “We’re not going to –”

“It looks like it’s just you and me, Clint,” Tony talks right over Steve. “Or do you wanna join us, Bucky?”

There is a twist to his smile that looks so adorable, Steve has a hard time remembering why he is trying to keep his boyfriend from doing something that has him smiling like that.

“Buck?” Steve asks warningly, staring at his best friend – who stares back with the kind of glee in his expression that tells Steve they are all doomed.

“That sounds like my kind of threesome,” Bucky finally says. Almost as an afterthought, he offers, “Steve will stand guard.”

Everybody nods as if everything is decided already and they are good to go. To be honest, Steve would not put it past them if they did go off right now, only remembering they do not actually have the key when they are already pressing their noses flat against Fury’s door.

“I will definitely not help you in any way to break into our headmaster’s office,” Steve declares as firmly as he manages and focuses sternly on his friends.

In turn, they muster him, smiling and full of confidence.

“He’s in,” Tony and Bucky say at the exact same time, their voices even filled with the same dry conviction that Steve will not let them go off on their own.

All four of them look at each other and burst out laughing as if they have done so a thousand times. The last of Steve’s lingering worries dissipate at that. Pressing himself against Tony’s shoulder again, he is filled with the warm knowledge of being exactly where he wants to be.

Everything is all right.

#iron man bingo 3000 #stony #fanfiction #highschool au #established relationship #fluff #humour #tony stark #steve rogers #clint barton #bucky barnes #friendship #ao3 #my writing

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catscraftsandcommentary · 5 years

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Tiny innkeeper Steve and cowboy Bucky vs the Old West

A while back, @greenbergwrites had an idea about a Steve/Bucky AU set in the Old West, and I expanded on it a little bit. Well, since then I’ve been thinking about it some more, so have an updated version.

Steve is an omega who inherited an inn from his parents - the Irish Rose. It’s a simple little place, but he loves it and works hard to keep it clean and neat. It reminds him of his ma, and her stories about moving out West with his pa and building the Rose. It’s small - a common room, kitchen, and his room on the ground floor with a few inn rooms above and a stable out back - but it’s his. His family’s, for all that he’s the only one left.

New Brooklyn - the town where the Rose is - is also pretty small, really just a stopping point between (slightly) larger towns around them, or a way to fill in large empty patches on a map.

Mr. Fury runs the general store, which doubles as the post office and sometimes the sheriff’s office, if someone needs him or his friend Coulson to keep the peace. They’re both confirmed bachelors, and sometimes one or the other will ride off for a week or to “for business”, though Steve doesn’t know what type of business that is. It’s odd to have two alphas sharing a business, but they seem to get along fine. They keep to themselves, although Mr. Coulson is always friendly when Steve stops in for supplies.

The other main business in town, though - Brock Rumlow owns The Second Head, and he’s a bastard of a bartender and an alpha if Steve’s ever seen one. He comes on all charming, but he turns nasty if he doesn’t get what he wants. And he’s wanted the Irish Rose for years.

It’s too big for one little omega to manage all by himself, he says, especially with how sick little Stevie gets. And the Head and the Rose are right next door, it just makes sense to merge them together. Besides, wouldn’t Steve feel better with a nice strong alpha to watch over him, keep him safe?

That last is usually accompanied with a pat to Steve’s ass, which Steve returns by punching Rumlow, and then someone needs to pull them apart. Steve despises Rumlow, and his useless, mangy friends who hang around. He dislikes alphas in general, from their arrogance to their condescending assumptions to their invasive manners. He’s turned away more than one customer for asking to see “the alpha of the house,” as if he can’t manage on his own.

Despite this, he has fairly steady business. New Brooklyn is half a day’s ride south of Stark Town, the nearest city, and sometimes travelers who didn’t stop in the larger city will stop here. Hell, some people just want the quiet. There’s been a rivalry between the Starks - Howard Stark and then his son Tony - and Alexander Pierce for as long as Steve remembers. Pierce wants to own the whole west, and Stark wants a railroad, but not through Pierce’s land, and it’s all a headache.

Anyway, Steve doesn’t worry about it. He has an inn to run, and that’s enough for him. He’s not expecting anything new when a woman comes in, requesting two rooms and three stalls in the stables, so he just shows her upstairs. She’s small, with bright red hair and a beautiful face, though her eyes are hard. A sandy-haired man follows her, stopping to throw a bag in the second room, and Steve doesn’t pay them much mind before he goes to start dinner.

He doesn’t see the third lodger until the morning, when he’s trying - and mostly failing - to get the stove to cooperate long enough to cook breakfast. A handsome alpha with shoulder length, dark hair drags his way into the kitchen, looking mostly asleep and barely dressed.

“God, s’that coffee?” His voice is low and sleep-slurred. “Fuckin’ Barton always burns it.”

Handsome the man may be, but Steve still glares at his intrusion into his kitchen. “Breakfast will be ready in a few minutes. You can wait in the common room.”

The man, for a wonder, takes the hint and ambles off to sit where he can watch the kitchen door and the stairs. He actually keeps the other man from barging in too, which earns him a little respect.

And the first mug of coffee, when Steve calls the trio to fill their plates. The woman has to drag the other man away from the coffee pot and back to the table, an exasperated look on her face. “Barnes, keep him here while I get food.”

“Yes’m.”

Steve’s surprised to hear an alpha man obey a beta woman, but perhaps she’s his sister? “Are you Barton?”

“No, that’s the useless lump.” She nods at the sandy-haired man, now whining into his empty mug. “Romanova. Free rider and hired gun.” She offers a hand, and Steve takes it.

“Steve Rogers, innkeep.” He takes the coffee pot over to their table and refills everyone’s cup. Barton is too asleep to do more than gulp it down immediately - and how he doesn’t burn himself, Steve doesn’t know - but Barnes smiles and thanks him.

They don’t stay long after breakfast - Barton drinks an entire pot of coffee by himself while the other two work steadily through their food. Barnes overpays for their stay, and when Barton grumbles, says that he owes it for drinking all of Steve’s coffee and he can win it back at the next bar.

TBC

#Steve Rogers #Bucky Barnes #stucky #steve/bucky #old west au #I have more ideas for this #about how to get them back together #and get Steve to stop bristling at every alpha he meets #he wasn't that bristly yet #yet

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eddycurrents · 5 years

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For the week of 10 June 2019

Quick Bits:

Age of Conan: Bêlit #4 sets up a rivalry with a high priest from Stygia in this penultimate issue. Tini Howard, Kate Niemczyk, Scott Hanna, Jason Keith, and Travis Lanham guide us through more of Bêlit’s family history and hints of madness.

| Published by Marvel

Age of X-Man: Marvelous X-Men #5 is the first of these minis to reach their end, but it’s far from a conclusion. While the team and Psylocke find out the nature of reality as everything starts unravelling, much still remains hanging, and the conclusion is set for Age of X-Man: Omega. Great art from Marco Failla and Matt Milla.

| Published by Marvel

Amber Blake #4 concludes what has been an entertaining thriller from Jade Lagardère, Butch Guice, Mike Perkins, Dan Brown, and Robbie Robbins. Some nice twists and surprises as this story ends.

| Published by IDW

Archie #705 is part one of “Archie & Sabrina”. I quite like the change to the trade dress to reflect that, giving the appearance of a limited series for the arc, while maintaining the ongoing numbering. Nice Spencer, Sandy Jarrell, Matt Herms, and Jack Morelli do a great job moving through Cheryl’s “Bachelor” plans to hints of things to come, along with impending conflict between Betty and Veronica.

| Published by Archie Comics

Batman & The Outsiders #2 spotlights the battle between Ishmael and the team as he goes for Sofia. Great art from Dexter Soy and Veronica Gandini. The little bits of occult belief and practice Bryan Hill gives to Ishmael are interesting.

| Published by DC Comics

Bronze Age Boogie #3 is another fun issue, pitting Li against Lynda for the Martians’ amusement. The pieces are all coming together nicely. Also, the “Major Ursa” back-up is just about the best thing ever.

| Published by Ahoy

By Night #12 is a bit of a weird one for the conclusion to this series, focusing almost solely on our side of the rift and what happens down the line for everyone. Still, this has been an entertaining series from John Allison, Christine Larsen, Sarah Stern, and Jim Campbell.

| Published by Boom Entertainment / BOOM! Box

Calamity Kate #4 brings this series from Magdalene Visaggio, Corin Howell, Valentina Pinto, and Zakk Saam to a close. It’s still a bit of a head-scratcher, wondering how much is real and how much is a manifestation of Kate’s issues with her break-up, but it’s entertaining.

| Published by Dark Horse

Detective Comics #1005 concludes the Arkham Knight’s “Medieval” arc from Peter J. Tomasi, Brad Walker, Andrew Hennessy, Nathan Fairbairn, and Rob Leigh. It’s really weird seeing Anton Arcane as anyone’s lackey, but that aside this is still a decent conclusion. The art from Walker, Hennessy, and Fairbairn is incredible.

| Published by DC Comics

The Empty Man #8 is the end of the series. For now at least. It’s a satisfying conclusion for this horror story from Cullen Bunn, Jesús Hervás, Niko Guardia, and Ed Dukeshire, even as it leaves hooks for the possibility of more. Very interesting bits of body horror and ideas about infection.

| Published by BOOM! Studios

The Flash #72 continues “Year One” from Joshua Williamson, Howard Porter, Hi-Fi, and Steve Wands. Once again, the artwork from Porter and Hi-Fi is phenomenal. The layouts, the action, the sheer visual storytelling is incredible.

| Published by DC Comics

Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man #7 is the first part of “Feast or Famine” from Tom Taylor, Ken Lashley, Nolan Woodard, and Travis Lanham. It’s May’s grand reopening of the FEAST shelter and it appears as though people are angry that it’s happening.

| Published by Marvel

Gogor #2 is possibly even better than the first issue, giving more focus to the tale even as Ken Garing does more world-building. This is a very interesting fantasy story, with fascinating characters and regions, and beautiful artwork.

| Published by Image

Hawkman #13 gives us a single-issue story from Robert Venditti, Will Conrad, Jeremiah Skipper, and Richard Starkings & Comicraft on the endless cycle of war. It’s a good bit of decompression following “Cataclysm” and Bryan Hitch’s run, using Carter’s endless resurrection to show the toll of battle on one planet.

| Published by DC Comics

Immortal Hulk #19 is another incredible issue in this amazing run, with Al Ewing, Joe Bennett, Ruy José, Belardino Brabo, Paul Mounts, Rachelle Rosenberg, and Cory Petit delivering hard on the new Abomination and Harpy. The body horror aspect of this story is ratcheted up even higher.

| Published by Marvel

Infinite Dark #7 looks like it’s building for a catastrophe for the end of this arc at a magnitude even greater than losing the outer ring in the first arc, as the remaining portion of the station gets plunged into the dark here. The level of tension that Ryan Cady, Andrea Mutti, K. Michael Russell, and Troy Peteri are creating here is about to explode.

| Published by Image / Top Cow

Joe Golem: Occult Detective - Conjurors #2 sees Joe brought back to life by Simon Church, against the objections of Simon’s ghost friends, and sets up the road to what looks like might be a new status quo, bringing forth an old direction. Great art from Peter Bergting and Michelle Madsen. I really quite like the murky appearance of the underwater scenes.

| Published by Dark Horse

Justice League Odyssey #10 gets a new logo while the team continues their search for relics for Darkseid. Also, more intrigue as they still don’t exactly know whether they can trust one another. Dan Abnett, Daniel Sampere, Juan Albarran, FCO Plascencia, and AndWorld Design are telling an interesting story here.

| Published by DC Comics

The Life & Death of Toyo Harada #4 enacts Angela’s plan on the rest of the team with explosive results. It’s interesting to see everything burnt to ash along the way. The flashbacks into Harada’s life this issue are illustrated by Diego Yapur and they’re worth it on their own, but you also get the present day material beautifully rendered by CAFU.

| Published by Valiant

Outer Darkness #7 begins the second arc from John Layman, Afu Chan, and Pat Brosseau. We get a little bit of Rigg’s past, more of the crew’s aggressive behaviour towards one another, and a rescue mission as an 18th century mansion tries to swallow another ship. This is the good, weird stuff.

| Published by Image / Skybound

The Punisher #12 begins Frank’s trek back to New York in the first part of “War on the Streets” from Matthew Rosenberg, Szymon Kudranski, Antonio Fabela, and Cory Petit. Great art from Kudranski and Fabela as Frank fights off a squad of Hydra goons on a remote island.

| Published by Marvel

The Ride: Burning Desire #1 returns for The Ride’s 15th anniversary, with a lead story from Doug Wagner, Daniel Hillyard, Laura Martin, and Ed Dukeshire, and a back-up illustrated by Adam Hughes. Nice set-up picking up on where Vega is now fifteen years later. And more depraved cops.

| Published by Image

Silver Surfer: Black #1 is another leg in Donny Cates’ redefinition of the Marvel Cosmic, joined here by Tradd Moore, Dave Stewart, and Clayton Cowles. This reminds me a bit of the George Perez/Tom Grindberg run from ages ago, with some incredible artwork from Moore and Stewart.

| Published by Marvel

Sonata #1 is a fairly imaginative sci-fi/fantasy debut from David Hine, Brian Haberlin, Geirrod van Dyke, and Francis Takenaga. It introduces us to to races of colonizers in the Ran and the Tayans, bringing conflict with them as they try to carve out new lives on Perdita. Beautiful artwork from Haberlin and van Dyke.

| Published by Image / Shadowline

Star Wars: Vader - Dark Visions #5 closes out this series of takes on different perspectives on Darth Vader with a barkeep suffering hallucinations as he tries to flee from Vader’s wrath, from Dennis Hallum, Geraldo Borges, Marcio Menyz, and Joe Caramagna.

| Published by Marvel

Supergirl #31 is pretty much concurrent with Superman #12, though you should probably read Superman first if you’re reading both of them. There’s no need to read both, though, as it stands well enough on its own. This one presents the reunion of the House of El from Kara’s perspective and then continues on the battle against Gandelo.

| Published by DC Comics

Superman #12 reunites the entire House of El amidst the battle with Rogol Zaar and the fleets trying to kill Jor-El. There’s foreshadowing of more “everything you know is wrong!” about Krypton’s destruction and Superman’s origin, which may or may not rub you the wrong way, but I find it entertaining. Especially with the beautiful artwork from Ivan Reis, Joe Prado, Oclair Albert, and Alex Sinclair.

| Published by DC Comics

Transformers #7 is part one of “The Cracks Beneath Your Feet”, with Brian Ruckley, Angel Hernandez, Andrew Griffith, Anna Malkova, Joana Lafuente, Josh Burcham, and Tom B. Long picking up again in the present, following up on the second recent murder on Cybertron. It’s fairly morose, as you’d expect, as Bumblebee laments the loss of the new spark, Rubble.

| Published by IDW

Trust Fall #1 is a great debut from the Dead Letters team of Christopher Sebela and Chris Visions, with Hassan Otsmane-Elhaou providing his usual outstanding lettering to round out the team. It’s another crime drama, with the interesting twist of a family member with teleportation powers. Visions’ art is amazing and the hook of the family being set-up to fall right as they’re ready to move on to bigger and better waters is enticing.

| Published by AfterShock

V-Wars: God of Death feels more like a tease than a discrete story. The good news is that you don’t need to have read any of the previous V-Wars stories, as this fills you in on what you need to know, the bad news is that there’s no indication as to anything else coming next. Still, great art from Alex Milne and Brittany Peer.

| Published by IDW

Other Highlights: Accell #21, Age of X-Man: Apocalypse & The X-Tracts #4, Amazing Spider-Man #23, Asgardians of the Galaxy #10, Catwoman #12, Champions #6, Elvira: Mistress of the Dark #6, Event Leviathan #1, Five Years #2, GI Joe: A Real American Hero #263, GLOW #2, The Grave, Grumble #7, Gunning for Hits #6, House of Whispers #10, Invaders #6, Ironheart #7, James Bond: Origin #10, Jim Henson’s The Storyteller: Sirens #3, Jughead’s Time Police #1, Major X #5, Marvel Action: Spider-Man #5, Morning in America #4, Oblivion Song #16, Orphan Age #3, Penny Nichols, Princeless - Book 8: Princesses #4, Prodigy #6, Red Sonja: Birth of the She-Devil #1, Rick & Morty Presents Mr. Meeseeks #1, She Could Fly: The Lost Pilot #3, Spider-Man: Life Story #4, Star Trek: The Q Conflict #5, Superior Spider-Man #7, Symbiote Spider-Man #3, The Umbrella Academy: Hotel Oblivion #7, The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl #45, Unnatural #10, Venom #15, War of the Realms: Giant-Man #3, Wonder Twins #5, Wonder Woman #72, Xena: Warrior Princess #3, X-Force #9

Recommended Collections: Avengers: No Road Home, Dark Souls: Age of Fire, Hawkman - Volume 1: Awakening, Hulkverines, Ice Cream Man - Volume 3: Hopscotch Melange, Lollipop Kids - Volume 1, Road of the Dead: Highway to Hell, Moonshadow, Star Trek vs. Transformers, Swamp Monsters, United States vs. Murder Inc. - Volume 1

d. emerson eddy likes pie.

#This Week in Comics

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thepunisher · 7 years

Text

A Bottle Marked ‘Poison’

Tony Stark/Bucky Barnes | E | 9428 words | 2/? |

ao3 link

Summary: The headstones are clean and well preserved and surrounded by fresh, colorful flowers when he reaches them. Not lilies, never lilies. But roses and sunflowers and violets. Someone has been taking care of them for years. (Not him. He can’t even take care of himself.) There’s names and dates and pictures. There’s quotes. Beloved mother. He has a split lip, his eye is a nasty shade of purple and he’s still nursing three bruised ribs. Somehow this hurts more. OR On the anniversary of their deaths, Tony visits his parents’ graves. He has an unexpected encounter. Things go downhill from there.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2: Longing

I take no joy in mead nor meat, and song and laughter have become suspicious strangers to me. I am a creature of grief and dust and bitter longings.

There is an empty place within me where my heart was once.

George RR Martin, A Clash of Kings

He debates a long time on whether or not he should go. He doesn't want to, of course. Just the thought has him jittery, anxiety buzzing under his skin like electricity, leg bouncing up and down non-stop. And yet it's not like he really has a choice.

When the walls of the workshop start closing in on him, sight going fuzzy around the edges, the decision is made for him. He throws the screwdriver he was fidgeting with on the work table, metal hitting the surface with a clang he doesn't even register because he's already out of the door.

The Mansion is austere and sterile, ghosts haunting every square metre of it.

Tony hates it. He hates the smell of it, the silence, the absolute lack of indication that someone is actually living here. He hates every damn stupid knick knack littering every available surface so much sometimes it's hard not to shove them all on the floor and watch them break in a thousand little pieces.

He hates that two decades later he still can't find the courage to go past the doors of the master bedroom. Can only look at his mother's perfume sitting on her vanity from afar, bottle left opened, pearls scattered near her brush.

He couldn't really move in his old room, the one of his childhood, of his teenage years. The one with stupid posters of his stupid heroes on the walls and a closet stuffed full of useless trophies that never amounted to anything. Too many memories and too many disappointments there. He took for himself one of the guest rooms. He thinks it's somewhat fitting, considering he's a guest in his own home.

It's a house but it feels more like a golden prison and he's been sentenced for life.

(He committed too many crimes he needs to atone for, he deserves it.)

He could take up and leave of course, like he left the tower, like he left the ruins of Malibu, like he left the compound. Tony Stark is good at leaving broken things behind him.

But to go where? He started over many times before and always ended up empty handed anyway. Resilient, yes, but there's nowhere in the world where his demons wouldn't follow, so the Mansion is as good a place as any.

He's doing fine, really.

(His life is a long line of fine.)

Christmas, though. Christmas he doesn't know how to deal with, perhaps he never has, never learned how to.

It's never been his favorite holiday, not even when his parents were still alive. Other children would spend the night waiting for Santa, he would be waiting for Howard and Maria to come home from whatever gala or party or get away they'd gone to, Jarvis, and Ana before she passed, his only company.

His mother would always look apologetic whenever they got back. She would caress his hair and kiss his cheek and tuck him into bed, her voice soft while singing an italian lullaby.

Jarvis would try his best to make the house as festive as possible, and Christmas’ eves were always spent making cookies and reminiscing stories of aunt Peggy’s adventures, and Christmas mornings were always spent unwrapping a pile of presents that would never make up for the indifference.

The first few days of January he would always be shipped back to boarding school, his belly fuller and his gaze emptier, head filled with words of inadequacy and sweet nothings.

He found Jarvis’ Christmas decorations in a closet, stored with other junk, while setting up Friday’s eyes and ears. He thought for a long time whether or not to make an effort and put some around the house, stared for even longer at a Christmas ball he had made with mechanical parts when he was six. Howard had been pissed at the waste, but Jarvis had looked so proud he's displayed it right at the front of the tree, nevermind that it clashed with the rest of the golden and red ornaments.

He didn't throw everything away, but it was a close call.

(Perhaps he is nostalgic after all.)

Still, there was no reason to put them around. No reason for oversized bunnies, either. And so the house is quiet, no trees, no lights, no presents. No people to celebrate with.

He could go on another 72 hours tinkering binge, his go-to way of spending this time of the year, so many things to do after all, but Rhodey would probably come over just to kick his ass, and he can't have Rhodey worry over him. He deserves a break.

The invitation came over a week ago, by phone, mail and text. Rhodey really wants him to go and he won't accept a no for an answer. Tony can take a hint.

He's gotten into his head that he'll smooth down all the wrinkles on his own. He's putting a lot of effort into making this whole team thing work, and that's really the only reason why Tony is gonna show up at all.

He should take the car, rather than fly in, but really, as an escape vehicle, his suit is much faster than his Audi.

And Tony is pretty sure that he'll want to escape sooner rather than later.

The flight over goes by in a blur, one thought chasing after the other too fast for his mind to linger. He has no recollection of it whatsoever.

The sky is white and the atmosphere feels charged when he lands on the roof of the compound. It hasn't started snowing yet, but it's gonna happen any minute now. Everyone has been predicting a white Christmas.

The suit disassembles and reassembles behind him in a matter of seconds and a crisp cold engulfs him so suddenly he staggers. He should have taken a coat with him, but he wasn't exactly thinking properly, leaving in a hurry before he could change his mind. Again.

The insulation system he installed after he almost froze to death works so well he never even noticed the temperature while in the air, and yet now that he is, it's easy for his mind to travel thousands of miles. For a moment he loses focus of the structure, of the gardens, of the trees around him, of the Quinjet parked in the front courtyard, and the only thing he can hear is the sound of crunching metal, no white pavement, but frozen ground under his feet. His hand moves to his chest before he can even process it, and he finds himself exhaling slowly only when he feels the arc reactor humming under his fingers. Whole.

Rationality is the first thing to go out of the window when you panic, and they say that you should make an effort to bring it back, as it's your best tool to fight anxiety, that you should explain to your brain that there's no reason to be scared.

(Bullshit.)

It's hard to reason when reason also screams that this is a terrible idea, and he should not have come.

It's not too late to tuck in tail and leave, but he doesn't. He pats down his hair instead, thankful it's so short so it's probably not too messy, and hopes that there's no engine grease on his rumpled clothes.

The Iron Man follows him down inside the compound like a quiet shadow, before parking itself in a hidden niche.

There are a few people around the building, operatives who work for the Avengers and keep things in check, run lesser risk operations, keep the world spinning.

Tony waves at them whenever he crosses them in the hallways, Christmas trees and lights and decorations making the place look more alive than he's seen it in a very long time.

It's been almost a month since he last made an appearance. He's been upstate less and less since it got crowded again, any excuse good enough to stay as far away as he could.

(Sorry, super important SI meeting, Pepper would kill me if I missed it; oops, launch of a new product; you see, I have this thing, and it's much more convenient if I just stay over at the Mansion.)

It never felt like home. Not really. Not after they defeated Ultron, and he would stroll in sometimes, bringing tech as presents and basking in a camaraderie that always had him feeling like a guest in his own property. Definitely not after all that was left of the Avengers were him and Rhodey and Vision, and the silence would echo across the hallways.

(Home is where the heart is, and he doesn't have one.)

“I'm so glad you came, Tones,” says Rhodey the moment he enters the common dining area, and enveloping him in a hug.

Tony allows himself to soak in the moment and hugs him back so tightly his bruised ribs protest. He doesn't care.

Too soon he lets go, his eyes darting fast across the room, taking in the scene in a matter of seconds.

It seems like a century ago that they were all here discussing the Accords, the quiet before the storm, the beginning of the end. The place doesn't even look the same anymore. He tore it down and built it over after Wanda and Vision’s little accident, but every inch of it is burned into his retina like a scar and it's not gray marble he stands on, shiny and whole, but a gaping hole that reaches the foundations; it's not scattered people chatting and a table overfilled with food around him, but too many empty chairs.

(None of them look the same. They're all strangers under friendly disguises.)

He told everyone that the new look and the new furniture were necessary for structural reasons, but the truth is that it was too painful to walk past those rooms everyday and be constantly reminded of what had been and what no longer was.

(Some gaping holes you can't fill.)

“Oh, I wouldn't have missed it for the world, Rhode-Bear,” Tony replies nonchalant and he feels like snickering when Rhodey rolls his eyes in the exasperated way that is only reserved for him.

He looks good. Steadier than he was even the last time he saw him. He's standing on his own, one arm propped casually on a piece of furniture as an afterthought, as if he doesn't really need it.

Tony studies him like an hawk. Guilt clawing at his insides cause he should have made an effort, he should have come more often and not just to check on the braces. He shouldn't have stayed away so much just cause the prospect of facing the others feels like sandpaper across his skin.

He takes in Rhodey’s relaxed pose, his brown eyes free of the uneasiness Tony got so used to seeing after the fall and hated with every fibre of his being. His shoulders are not clenched in an effort to handle the pain, physical and not, he knows Rhodey felt for months.

Tony hopes the hand squeezing Rhodey’s shoulder, and his half but sincere smile can convey all the words he will never be able to tell him. All the love he will never be able to express.

“I was so sure I was going to have to come and drag you here,” Rhodey says, his tone only half joking, and Tony thinks of the half dozen messages of empty excuses he composed on his phone and deleted before he could send them. “I'm really happy you came, man.”

“Yeah, well…” He rubs behind his neck. “It's Christmas.”

“That, it is,” Rhodey says, before narrowing his eyes. “So would you mind telling me what happened to your face? What's with the black eye and the lip job, Tony. What the hell.”

“What, this?” Tony gestures towards the bruises. Shit. He should have put on concealer or something. “I was just sparring with Happy. I got a little distracted and he got carried away. That man has a surprisingly mean hook.”

Rhodey scoffs. ”Yeah, nice try. Too bad Happy is in California with Pepper right now. Has been for two weeks, in fact. Wanna try again?”

Tony winches. He wonders how long it would take to call his suit to him and run, and if that would be considered rude. Probably. Nevermind that Rhodey would just hop on the War Machine and follow him, and he would never hear the end of it.

“Uhm. Funny story,” Tony says, putting some distance between them, hand scratching his nose. “I ran into a door.”

He can see Carol chatting with Wanda, Sam and Vision from the corner of his eye. His heart speeds up a little. He knows that not all of them are going to be here, some of them are celebrating with their families and other people. Some of them moved on.

(He hasn't.)

He thinks he can spot Natasha and Peter behind the tree, but he's not sure. Rogers is nowhere in sight. Nor is his friend.

When he turns to face Rhodey again, he meets the most unimpressed stare. “And what? You didn't apologize so it hit you again?”

Tony giggles. God, he missed this. Missed him. He feels his shoulders sag a little in relief. This is familiar. He can do this.

“It was a very aggressive door. You wouldn't believe it. I'm thinking I'm gonna sue,” he says.

Rhodey pinches the bridge of his nose. “Yeah, you show it who's the boss.”

“Exactly!”

“Tony,” Rhodey says, tone serious again. “I wanna know what's going on with you, okay? I wanna help. I'm here for you, you know. Whatever it is you're doing, you don't have to do it alone.”

It's hard to meet his eyes. God, he's such an asshole. He doesn't deserve Rhodey.

“I'm not doing anything, I promise,” he says, and it'd be convincing to anyone else but Rhodey knows him better. “Okay, okay. But it’s not like I started a fight club! I'm not doing anything dangerous. Better?”

“I'm more worried about you doing something stupid.”

Tony sneers. “Come on. When was the last time I did something stupid?”

“Oh, I don't know. What time is it?”

“Abuse!” Tony cries. “I will not stand by and be insulted. I'll have you know I made the list of the fifty most influential people on the planet for what? The eighth year in a row?” He polishes his nails on his shirt. “That's eight more times than you did, by the way. How is that for stupid?”

When he looks up, Rhodey is still staring unimpressively.

“You do know I'm the leader of this team right?”

Tony fakes a gasp, his hand moving in a clutching-pearls gesture. “What? When did that happen? I can't believe this!” He shakes his head, drops the pretense. “I was kinda there for it, you know? Wholeheartedly supported the idea, in fact, though I'm starting to regret it. You don't need to remind me every three seconds, I get it! You're the leader of the Avengers, sir, yes, sir. It's too bad your girlfriend outranks you, really...”

Rhodey sighs. “Yeah, you can drop the attitude, Mr Stank, cause I never will. I'm gonna find out what's going on, sooner or later.” He points his index at Tony. “You know I will. And when I do, I will kick your sorry as--”

“Mr Stark! Mr Stark!” Peter calls from across the room, making them both turn. “Merry Christmas, Mr Stark!”

“Nice to see you again, Tony,” says Carol, beautiful in a dark blue oversized cardigan and jeans, as she and Peter make their way towards them and Tony is so grateful for the distraction he can't stop himself from sighing in relief.

“Hey there, kid,” he says, ruffling Peter's hair. He's wearing an ugly Christmas sweater and a happy expression on his face, like a child in a candy store.

“Carol. Always a pleasure.” He smiles, kisses her cheek.

“So,” he rubs his hands together. “What have you been up to?”

“Not much,” Carol says, inching towards Rhodey and resting her hand on his shoulder. Tony can see Rhodey’s whole demeanor lighting up, like a sunflower basking in the sun. It puts the first real smile on Tony’s face. “Things have been blessedly quiet.”

“Don't jinx it,” says Rhodey, eyes soft.

“How about you, kid? Helped any old lady cross the street lately?” Tony asks Peter.

“Ha. Ha. Very funny,” Peter replies. “I don't just help old ladies,” he mumbles grudgingly, almost too low to hear.

“You're adorable,” says Tony. “Is that Green... Elf. Whatever. Is he been giving you any trouble?”

“You've been listening to my reports?” Peter asks in a happily surprised tone, eyes huge.

“Well, duh. When have I ever stopped?” He raises an eyebrow. “So? Do I need to be concerned?”

“Uh. No. No, Mr Stark,” says Peter fast. “I have everything under control! And it's Goblin. Green Goblin.”

“Pfff,” Tony waves his hand. “Goblin, Elf. Same difference. He still looks stupid. You listen to me, kid. Anything goes south, you call me, okay? I don't want you out there alone. Again.”

“Oh, please, Tony,” interrupts Rhodey. “Peter is much more responsible than you'll ever be. And he knows who to call when he's in trouble. Which is me. Am I right?” He gives Peter a meaningful look.

“No, sir. I mean, yes, sir,” Peter blushes.

“See? Adorable,” Tony says. “Now leave him alone, I got him first. Go play mama hen with some other kid. This one is mine.”

Carol laughs at the two of them while Rhodey sputters and Peter gets more scarlet.

For a second Tony almost thinks that everything is going to be okay.

“It's good to see you, Tony,” says Rogers then, appearing behind Peter, and it's like someone poured frozen water over Tony’s head. “It's been a while.”

He's carrying two enormous plates, one in each hand. His hair is longer than the short, practical style Tony was used to see him sport, combed back, curling under his nape. There's an easy smile, almost shy, half hidden behind his beard. He's wearing a sweater almost as ugly as Peter's, with maroon reindeers with red noses.

Tony feels like his limbs have suddenly turned into lead, and they're too heavy for him to move. It takes a couple of seconds to put a smile back on his own face, and he's pretty sure it looks forced despite his best effort. “Cap,” he says, and it sounds strained even to his ears. He shoves one hand inside the pocket of his pants. “Well, you know how it is. Companies to run, millions to make, and all that.”

Everyone is quiet around them, almost like they're waiting for a bomb to go off.

(It already exploded. They're all wounded beyond saving.)

“Right,” says Rogers, and his face falls a little. “Yeah, you're busy, I know. It's just…” He juggles with the plates for a second before finding a balance. He eyes Tony’s bruises and Tony sees him hesitate, the words he means to say at the tip of his tongue. “Well, I'm glad you're here today,” he says, in the end. “I better put these down before I make a mess.” He smiles again, though it looks a little tighter, before heading towards the table.

There's a small awkward silence that no one is fast enough to fill.

That went well, Tony thinks, when he remembers to start breathing again.

He's still in a haze when he realises that Barnes is looming a few feet away from them, arms crossed over his chest. When he meets Tony's eyes, he nods. Tony blinks a couple of times before nodding back.

When he looks around he sees everyone exchange nervous glances. A couple of them sigh audibly.

“Well, I don't know about you guys, but I'm starving,” proclaims Rhodey. “Let's get this party started.”

~~~~~~~

He doesn't think anyone notices when he slips out. Rhodey and Carol are sitting on the same sofa, almost no space between them and there's a smile on Rhodey’s face Tony hasn't seen in a very long time. A smile that he never thought he would see again. It hurts deep inside Tony's chest, almost like it's getting a little hard to breathe, and if he stumbles so hard he needs the wall to steady himself, he's already in the hallway and it's nobody's business.

When he makes it to the roof, it's to find it already covered in white, his shoes leaving prints behind. It's been snowing for hours now.

It's cold and not for the first time he regrets not having taken a coat with him. He's sure he must have one or ten in his apartment here at the compound, but he hasn't set foot in there in a while, and he doesn't really want to.

He reaches the railing and stops, rests both hands on the granite, and it's like whatever force was holding him upright is failing him. He closes his eyes and breathes in the quiet, lets the air, sharp and brisk, fill his lungs.

It wasn't as bad as it could have been, but he still feels emotionally drained. There's an undercurrent of distrust between them all that it seems they're all politely agreeing to ignore for the sake of making things work. He doesn't know if he should be grateful for that or not, but he sure is grateful for Clint’s absence. And for Peter and Carol’s presence.

He wouldn't have made it without them acting as a buffer. He felt his heart constrict in his chest each time Rogers attempted to start a conversation, his jaw hurts from biting his teeth down too hard.

Someday in the future, perhaps, when he'll have made peace with himself and they'll have made peace with each other, someday, he'll be ‘Steve’ again, and calling him ‘Cap’ will roll off Tony’s tongue without faltering first. Not today though. Today he's an empty vessel filled with brashness and good manners.

Today his wound is still festering.

He doesn't know how long he stays like that, the grass that surrounds the building is slowly but steadily being covered by an inch of snow and it's sort of hypnotic to watch. The sky is whiter than ever, despite it being late afternoon and his breath is coming out in small puffs of smoke when he feels like he got himself under control.

He used to love snow, back when he was a kid. He was never allowed to go out and play with it, never really had anyone to play with either, that was a privilege that belonged to other kids, kids that were free. But he could watch. He'd see children throwing snowballs and building snowmen and he would long for that, his brain supplying faster trajectories and aerodynamic shapes.

Those fantasies disappeared the older he got, but the longing never really did. The longing of belonging.

(He never truly belonged anywhere and anyone who ever belonged to him left him behind.)

Tony cups his palms to his mouth and blows on them, uselessly trying to warm them up a little, his fingers numb. He should go back inside. He doesn't want to.

“You're gonna catch a cold,” says a voice from somewhere to his right and he's not proud of the high pitched sound that comes out of his lips.

Instinct has him strucking his hands out in defense as he turns around looking for threats. He made the mistake of assuming he was safe.

“Jesus Christ,” he exhales when he spots Barnes. He's sitting on the floor leaning to the railing, head tilted back, elbows resting on his knees, eyes closed. There's snow on his hair, some strands are wet. The top of his black henley appears soaked.

“Nah, just me,” says Barnes cheekily.

How long has he been there?

He finds himself walking towards him and he stops when he's only a few feet away. A few seconds ago he was almost all the way across the terrace. He doesn't remember moving.

“I do have a heart condition, you know,” Tony says, and he drums his fingers over his chest, hearing the glass ticking. Something flashes behind his eyes and suddenly he's back in Siberia again, Barnes digging his metal digits into the arc reactor of the suit, the uni beam ripping his arm off in one clean shot. He shakes his head to clear it, stumbling back, he hits the concrete railing behind him, and he looks up, wary that Barnes might have noticed, but Barnes hasn't moved at all.

Barnes snorts and it takes him a second to remember that he said something to prompt that reaction.

Tony narrows his eyes, angry at his own stupidity. Angry that his heart is beating too fast. Embarrassed that he allowed himself to be vulnerable when he should have been the least. That past and present collide every time he forgets to breathe and he doesn't know how to stop one from pouring into the other.

(He doesn't know how to live.)

“We gotta stop meeting like this,” he says. “Or we gotta stop meeting period, really. I'm good with either.”

Barnes says nothing, but Tony could swear his lips are twitching a little. He was not joking, not really. It hurts to see him.

He spent almost the entire week thinking about their last encounter, musing over all the things he should have done differently, all the words he should have said instead. He doesn't want to acknowledge any of it.

He's stuck in a limbo. He wants to move on but he can't get past it. It's not fair.

(It's not fair to either of them.)

“Are you following me?” Tony asks, cause it can't really be another coincidence. Whatever deity who loves to play games with his life wouldn't be this cruel.

Barnes looks up at that, one eyebrow raised. Someone should have gotten him a razor for Christmas, his face seems to always be sporting some kind of permanent stubble. There's snowflakes on his lashes as well, his eyes are really blue. “I was here first, actually. Are you following me?”

It's Tony's turn to snort.

He's the last person he wants to be alone with. Well, perhaps Rogers takes that gold medal, but Barnes comes a close second.

(Untrue. It's himself he doesn't want to be alone with, but there's nothing he can do about that.)

He came to the roof to regroup, to get himself together. He should have gone to his workshop, in hindsight that was clearly a much smarter idea. Less risk of running into people he'd rather avoid there. But he did actually need some air, and the workshop is filled with half abandoned projects he's been putting off for too long. He doesn't need a reminder of all the things he's yet to do. Of all he should come back to.

The wind is whipping Barnes’ hair around his face, and Tony registers for the first time that Barnes is not wearing a coat either.

“What's with you and your aversion for jackets?” he asks, remembering he was wearing just a hoodie back at the cemetery as well. “You know, those things you use when it's cold? Ever heard of them?” He shivers, rubbing his hands together to no avail. The temperature doesn't seem to be affecting Barnes at all, despite the fact that he must have sat there under the snow for far longer than Tony figures.

“You mean those heavy things that keep you warm? Pretty sure we had those last century too,” Barnes replies, tone dry. Asshole thinks he's funny, wonderful.

“Guess it's one of the perks of being a super soldier,” Tony mutters.

Barnes shrugs.

Tony turns to face the garden again, leaning forwards, elbows resting on the railing. He spots Peter throwing a snowball to Sam before taking cover behind a tree, Wanda using her powers to hit Vision with much more snow than is usually polite. Vision doesn't seem too upset as it goes right through him. “That's cheating!” Wanda screams, laughter in her voice.

“I don't mind the cold,” Barnes says, voice so soft, Tony almost misses it. “Reminds me of cryo. Cryo meant peace for me.” He lets out a long exhale. “There were no missions in cryo.”

Tony doesn't know what to say to that, so he says nothing.

He wonders if Barnes has any other reason for disclosing such truths other than to unsettle him. If he's even aware that he's doing it. That he's baring himself to a stranger. A stranger who tried to kill him.

When he angles his face to see him, he finds that Barnes hasn't moved, head still tilted back, eyes still closed. Hair and shirt wetter.

“Why didn't you stay in cryo then?” he asks, not sure why. “In Wakanda, I mean.”

“That… that wasn't really my decision.”

“Steve,” Tony says, cause it's not really a question. He already knows the answer.

“I guess the world needed me.” Barnes shrugs again. “Well, they needed my... talents.”

Tony is quiet for a while. He thinks back at the battle with Thanos, at the world disintegrating under their feet. At the certainty that they wouldn't have made it. That he'd disappointed them all cause he hadn't tried hard enough, he hadn't planned ahead enough, despite knowing what was coming. Despite having felt it in his bones.

“What about now?” he says eventually. Thinking that if it was him, if he had a way to turn it all off to find even some semblance of serenity, he would go on his knees and beg for it.

Barnes brow furrows. “Why don't I go back to cryo?”

“Yeah.”

It's a while before Barnes replies. He turns his head away when he does, gaze distant. “I thought about it. I think about it a lot actually. It's not like the world really needs me anymore. No one really needs me.”

Tony makes a sound at that. “Pretty sure your buddy would disagree.”

Barnes shakes his head, wet strands falling in front of his eyes. “Stevie doesn't understand. He's still waiting for his best friend and that man is dead. He’s been dead for a very long time.”

“Why don't you then?”

Barnes’ lips twist in a parody of a smile. “Guess that would make a lot of people happy, wouldn't it?”

Tony stays quiet. He thinks about it. Would it?

Not having to see him would certainly be easier for him, but it wouldn't change much of anything at all. His parents would still be dead. Steve would still have lied.

Barnes looks at his hands. “I've… I've killed a lot of people. I don't even know how many. I've been Hydra’s puppet for a very long time. Nothing will ever take that back. There's no undoing the things I've done.”

When he meets Tony’s eyes, there's no hiding the depth of his sorrow.

(It's like looking in a mirror.)

“I can't go to sleep. I don't think I… I can't go to sleep.”

I don't think I deserve it , Tony thinks. That's what he meant to say, he doesn't know how but he's sure of it.

Tony opens his mouth to say something. He doesn't know what yet, but he feels like he has to say something.

“There you are, Buck! I've been looking all over for you,” comes from behind them, and Tony jerks upright as if burned. When he turns around he finds Rogers standing at the door.

The moment Rogers spots him, Tony can see his friendly expression turn into one of confusion, then concern, eyes darting from Tony to Barnes before settling on Tony.

“Hey, Tony,” he says, tentative. “I thought you already left.”

He turns to Barnes, gaze assessing. “Everything alright?” he asks, and it's stupid but the two words hurt Tony more than they have any right to, more than he expects them to, despite the fact that he knew they were coming.

Rogers doesn't trust them to be alone together. It's fair. But it's a reminder that something between the two of them is fundamentally broken.

Some broken things you can fix, assembling the pieces if you can find them all, and gluing them back together. Some will still work, as good as new, but they will always carry the cracks like scars. In some, the water will find a way to filter through those cracks, and they'll be whole, but not whole .

Which ones will they be?

(The glue is still drying for them. Soon they'll know.)

“As a matter of fact, I was just leaving,” Tony says, and a handful of seconds later the suit flies to him and he's encased in its shell. Safe again.

“Well, this was nice,” he says, already hovering a few feet off the floor. Barnes and Rogers are both looking at him. Barnes’ hands are closed into fists, Rogers mouth is hanging open. “Let's never do it again.”

He waves once, before lifting off. He doesn't wait for a reply. If it comes, he doesn't hear it. He's already gone.

#winteriron #buckytony #tonybucky #starkbucks #bucky x tony #mcu #winteriron fic #fic**#my fic**#I totally forgot to post it here when I posted it on ao3 cause I suck #oh well #at least I'm almost done with chapter 3 <3

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themeatlife · 5 years

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The List - the Meat Life Reviews the Avengers: Infinity Saga

It’s back! the Meat Life’s The List returns to rank all of the MCU Infinity Saga movies from Iron Man all the way to Spider-Man: Far From Home.

With the home release of Avengers: Endgame, I thought it would be a great time to revisit the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Two summers ago, after I had watched Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 and about a month before I got to watch Spider-Man: Homecoming, I ranked the MCU movies. You can find that ranking here. Now that I have watched what Kevin Feige describes as the final installment in Marvel’s Infinity Saga, I go through the movies again and rank all 23 installments including the last two --- Avengers: Endgame and Spider-Man: Far From Home. For the ones I ranked in the first one, I have included their old ranking in parentheses. And since Tumblr now limits pictures in entries to ten, I will include pictures of the new reviews.

#23 (15) - The Incredible Hulk (2008)

This is the second film in the first phase of the MCU. The movie is mostly forgotten in the MCU, including by me. It wasn’t a bad movie (certainly a marked improvement from 2003′s Hulk), but it felt like something was missing from it. Of course, there is only so much you can do with a character in its own movie. We find Bruce Banner (played by Edward Norton in this movie) being chased by General Ross, the man who spearheaded the project to create super soldiers that created the Hulk. Ross will become an important figure 8 years later in Civil War. And of course at the end of the movie we have a Tony Stark-building a team cameo and this was the intro of OG Avenger Bruce Banner/Hulk. Was the worse MCU movie in my initial ranking, and it remains there.

#22 (14) - Iron Man 2 (2010)

The weakest of the Iron Man movies. They replace Terrence Howard’s Rhodey with Don Cheadle, who in the long run has better chemistry with Robert Downey Jr, but in this movie is just weird to see instead of Howard. The villains are also probably the weakest of the MCU, with Ivan Vanko looking to exact revenge against the Stark family and Justin Hammer as the head of rival weapons manufacturer looking to take down Tony Stark. Totally didn’t notice the Elon Musk cameo until about the fourth time I watched it, a big inspiration for the Tony Stark movie character. The biggest contribution to the MCU/Infinity Saga is the introduction of OG Avenger Black Widow.

#21 (10) - Thor: The Dark World (2013)

Loki is one of the better villains of the MCU, and in The Dark World he is on full display. Is he good? Is he bad? In this installment, Thor must work with Loki to defeat the Dark Elves who are going after Jane Foster because she has the Ether within her. The cliff-hanger style ending makes it almost unfulfilling. The plot isn’t really as important as the introduction of the Ether, later known as the Reality Stone and the movie’s use in Avengers: Endgame.

#20 (9) - Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015)

Although Age of Ultron was seen as a step back from the first Avengers, it is still a very solid film especially after knowing the full picture of the Infinity Saga. This is very much a set up movie, though. We see Tony Stark accidentally create Ultron out of feeling the need to further protect the world (and also created Vision to counter). We see Hawkeye with a family and a Romanov-Banner romance. We see the introduction of the Maximov kids, with Quicksilver’s death toward the end and Scarlet Witch joining the Avengers. And whilst on the run we also see some of the seeds of tension between Stark and Rogers as well as the leveling of the Sokovia that are important later in Captain America: Civil War. I also didn’t notice that much when I first watched but they introduced Wakanda as the source of vibranium and the vibranium poacher Ulysses Klaue.

#19 (13) - Thor (2011)

I did enjoy the movie, although I will say that this is one of the weaker entries in the MCU. As the heir to the throne of Asgard, the arrogant Thor loses his hammer and must prove his worthiness before getting it back. He bumps into scientist Jane Foster played by Natalie Portman (yes!). He humbles himself and eventually earns back his hammer and has to fight the forces of his brother Loki. We see the first appearance of Hawkeye who will become one of the OG Avengers.

#18 (11) - Doctor Strange (2016)

Arrogant doctor Stephen Strange travels to Nepal in search of a treatment for his hands that were devastated from a car accident. He gets trained by the Ancient One to reveal powers in how to access different dimensions and wield mystical weapons. He has to harness these powers to fight Kaecilius, who has stolen pages of an ancient handbook to access the Dark Dimension. Some of the mystical stuff might not be for everyone and I only stuck with it because I like Benedict Cumberbatch and I’m glad I did. I’ve heard Doctor Strange described as Iron Man but with magic, and that’s not wrong.

#17 - Captain Marvel (2019)

We see Carol Danvers, who has lost her memory of her origin and has an unrealized power, think she’s Kree, a sort of police warrior race. She eventually goes against them when she figures out they exiled Krulls and lied to her about her human origin. Along the way she goes to Earth in the 1990’s and does sort of a buddy cop detective case with the SHIELD agent Nick Fury to figure out who she is. It was cool to see how Fury loses his eye and seeing the old Tesseract/Space Stone. While Captain Marvel is not a bad movie, in my opinion this would have been a much stronger movie if they leaned more into her backstory of being held down and knocked down a lot more. Unintentionally, but in my mind this will always be measured against Wonder Woman, about the only thing in the MCU era that DC did better than Marvel.

#16 (6) - Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 (2017)

I had this ranked higher in my initial ranking but I must say after a while I liked some of the other titles better than this one. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 picks up where the last left off, mixing the right amount of humor and action and pulling on just enough heartstrings for you to be pulled right in. The Guardians have to face against someone they never expected: Peter Quill’s dad. We see the introduction of Mantis and her addition to the Guardians.

#15 (8) - Ant-Man (2015)

Ant-Man grew on me. Marvel may well have a formula now with the mix of humor and superhero action, but it’s a formula that works. Here we follow unlikely hero Scott Lang played by Paul Rudd, a former engineer turned petty criminal, training to break into Pym Technologies using Hank Pym’s old shrinking suit to take down the corrupted Pym protege Darren Cross. Rudd’s humor, chemistry with Evangeline Lilly’s Hope van Dyne, along with humorous sidekicks played by Michael Pena and T.I. are the glue to this movie.

#14 (7) - Iron Man 3 (2013)

I think most don’t give the final installment of the Iron Man trilogy much credit. We are reminded of why we love the Tony Stark character. In spite of his arrogance there is a tremendous heart, and we see both on full display here. Set after the events of the first Avengers, Stark is going through PTSD. He tries to navigate through that while being attacked by new threats. And it was good after the large scale of the first Avengers movie to get something more down to Earth.

#13 - Ant-Man and the Wasp (2018)

We pick up after the events of Captain America: Civil War, where Scott Lang is serving the back end of a two-year house arrest for breaking the Sokovia Accords. Hank Pym and Hope van Dyne are underground and developed a quantum accelerator in the hopes of getting Hank’s wife Janet van Dyne out of the quantum realm. Arms dealer Sonny Burch and unstable phasing Ghost are after the accelerator. After the heaviness of Avengers: Infinity War, it was nice to have a little relief on a smaller scale. And Paul Rudd doing Paul Rudd things is always pleasant.

#12 - Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)

Picking up after the events of Captain America: Civil War (and apparently “eight years” after the first Avengers movie), we see Peter Parker filling his time being the friendly neighborhood Spider-Man under the distant watchful eye of Happy Hogan and Tony Stark. That is, until he finds The Vulture’s henchmen Shocker one and two selling weapons infused with alien tech from the Invasion of New York. We get a great sequence where Peter learns the night of homecoming that his love interest Liz is actually the Vulture’s daughter and all the tension that follows. With all due respect to Tobey Maguire and Andrew Garfield, Tom Holland fits the Spider-Man/Peter Parker role the very best. And at the end, we get something that rarely happens with Marvel villains...the Vulture lives and goes to jail.

#11 (12) - Captain America: The First Avenger (2011)

This movie has aged very well over time. Steve Rogers, a scrawny kid from New York, wanted to serve his country in the middle of World War II. He was selected for experimental super soldier program and became the face of the US military, spending time raising money for the USO. Then he starts hunting down Nazi science division Hydra and its leader Red Skull. It ends with Rogers downing a Hydra bomber and crashing it in ice, preserving him until modern time. It also heartbreakingly separates Rogers from love interest Peggy Carter, SSR Agent who helped him through his WWII missions and promised a dance. This pays off later.

#10 (5) - Iron Man (2008)

The film that kick started the entire MCU. Here we follow Tony Stark and the origin of Iron Man, birthed from Stark being captured by a mercenary terror group and called to action after seeing his company’s weapons in the wrong hands. This was a role ready-made for Robert Downey Jr, a great mix of arrogance, empathy, and quick wit. And there’s plenty of action. And with that first movie we get the first post-credit scene, a now trademark Marvel touch, introducing Nick Fury the Director of SHIELD recruiting Stark into a “bigger universe.”

#9 (4) - Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)

I’ll admit, when Marvel announced Guardians of the Galaxy, I had planned on skipping out. I knew nothing of the comic and it looked cheesy. So yes, I had my doubts about a group that included a talking raccoon and a fighting tree. But I gave it a chance and Guardians ended up being one of the stronger movies of the MCU. We see the origin of Peter Quill, a.k.a. Star-Lord and how the Guardians came together. This has that right mix of humor, action, chemistry, and 80s mix tape. And we see the introduction of the Orb containing the Power Stone.

#8 - Spider-Man: Far From Home (2019)

Eight months following the events of Avengers: Endgame, we get to see some of the aftermath of the world after “The Blip,” including a hilarious school news tribute video of our fallen heroes set to Whitney Houston’s rendition of “I Will Always Love You.” We see Nick Fury commandeer Peter’s summer class trip to Europe to initially help Mysterio battle what looks to be Elementals from another dimension set to destroy Earth. Little do we know that it’s all an illusion that Mysterio and a crew of technicians in an effort to destroy Tony Stark’s legacy and become the biggest savior of the world. That’s about as in depth I’ll go since this movie is still in theaters so I won’t spoil the fun. But I will say that this is probably the best version of a Spider-Man movie with all the awkward teen moments, his heavy weight of responsibility of being in line to be the next Tony Stark, and the sweet interplay between Parker and Zendaya’s MJ as well as bestie Jacob Batalon’s Ned. The MCU is in good hands post-Infinity Saga with Spider-Man on board. And there is a great surprise in the end credit scene.

#7 - Thor: Ragnarok (2017)

This Thor. Marvel finally figured out how to use Thor and Chris Hemsworth’s comedic timing. Right from the opening monologue you get that this is a different movie from the other two Thor’s. After Odin’s death, Thor’s half-sister Hela takes over Asgard as Thor and Loki disappear to the planet Sakaar. Thor is imprisoned as a gladiator-style fighter where he bumps into his “friend from work” Hulk. They all link up with Valkyrie, a former Asgardian warrior to escape Sakaar and save the Asgardian people from destruction. We see great comedy and chemistry between all the main characters, Idris Elba’s Heimdall get a lot of screen time protecting and hiding the Asgardian people from Hela, and hilarious performances from Karl Urban’s Skurge and Jeff Goldblum’s Grandmaster. In the end credit scene we see Thanos’ ship coming in for the events directly preceding Avengers: Infinity War.

#6 (3) - The Avengers (2012)

Director Joss Whedon pulled off what people once thought impossible...a superhero team-up movie. We see Nick Fury pull together Captain America, Iron Man, Thor, Hulk, Black Widow and later Hawkeye for the first time to figure out and stop Loki’s plan to use the Chitauri warriors to take over Earth. The Avengers definitely is an action movie with some dramatic elements but the thing that sticks out about this is even with New York City in peril, the ride is great! The chemistry of the entire ensemble is on full display. ��Before Thanos, Loki makes for probably the strongest villain in the series. When this came out, it was hard to see Marvel top this. And we see a glimpse of Thanos for the first time in a post-credits scene.

#5 - Black Panther (2018)

Marvel never stops amazing world building, a vibrant look at the fictional nation of Wakanda included. Black Panther picks up after the events of Captain America: Civil War, but to open we get a flashback of Oakland, California in 1992 that will impact the entire plot that follows. We then see Prince T’Challa get crowned king upon his return to Wakanda, following the death of his father T’Chaka in Civil War. Mysterious American Killmonger works with vibranium poacher Ulysses Klaue at first seemingly to steal more vibranium. As the movie progresses it is revealed that Killmonger is actually Wakandan whose father was killed in the opening scene in Oakland and is after the throne. Upon several viewings, there are multiple layers as there are in Ryan Coogler directed movies. This movie is part James Bond (with T’Challa’s sister Shuri playing the Q role), part family drama, part political thriller, and of course part Marvel movie. Black Panther tries to tackle political issues like inclusion, globalization, and immigration while also addressing how a family’s mistakes from the past can haunt and impact a family’s future. Michael B Jordan’s Killmonger is a top three MCU villain and there are wonderful performances from Lupita Nyong’o’s Nakia, Danai Gurira’s Okoye, Martin Freeman’s Everett Ross, and Andy Serkis’ Klaue. The end credit scene shows a relaxed Bucky talking to Shuri about his recovery.

#4 (2) - Captain America: Civil War (2016)

In this installment, the Avengers find themselves under hot water after an accident on a mission. The UN votes to approve the Sokovia Accords that limits the Avengers decision making, splitting the team between those who support it who stand with Iron Man and those who oppose it who stand with Captain America. During the signing, we see an attack that initially looked like it was done by the Winter Soldier but is really carried out by a former Sokovian special forces soldier who is seeking to destroy the Avengers for indirectly killing his family. Civil War has probably the coolest fight scene of the series at a German airport. The newbies Black Panther and Spider-Man are a sight to see. And there is a twist ending that’s really heart wrenching that splits our two main Avengers in Iron Man and Captain America.

#3 - Avengers: Endgame (2019)

I reviewed this a few months ago, so I’ll provide the link to my review here. What I will discuss here is how great this movie is. I almost put this at number 1. The storytelling and the conclusion to many of the main characters is so satisfying as a fan. It just felt so good to watch. I may rank this higher if I ever revisit the Infinity Saga, but for now I think top three at the very least is very very good. And it is the most satisfying ending to a movie series since The Dark Knight Rises. But I placed the other two above it for the reasons I will outline.

#2 (1) - Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014)

Wow. For so long this has been my favorite MCU movie and probably still is. We see Cap and Black Widow running from SHIELD, out to hunt down the Winter Soldier for the assassination of Nick Fury. Out of all the MCU, this movie had a modern real world feel with its questions about how to determine whether or not someone is a threat. It kind of revisits a concept dealt with in Minority Report, whether someone’s free will determines their criminality or their preconceived conditions. It had great action sequences. And it defined the direction of the MCU with its revelation that Hydra was secretly controlling SHIELD for all those years. In this installment in the MCU, we see the possibility of how these movies can be dealt. There can be genre movies within the comic book genre. This was the political spy thriller of the MCU, in the same vein as some of those political thrillers of the 1970s. And as it pertains to the bigger Infinity Saga story, we find out Steve Roger’s old buddy Bucky is the infamous assassin The Winter Soldier. And we get the introduction of Sam Wilson, the Falcon.

#1 - Avengers: Infinity War (2018)

I never got to review this when it initially came out. This is basically a Thanos movie disguised and named as an Avengers movie. The best MCU villains have the most fleshed out backstories, and in Infinity War we get Thanos’ background, how his world collapsed and how he came about his reasoning behind wanting to eliminate half of the universe’s inhabitants. You see his rational, and even though he goes about things the wrong way (I mean, he is a villain), you get to see his reasoning and motivation behind his quest. For this alone, I felt compelled to rank it number one just because of how different the approach was and how effective the execution turned out.

Then, inter-spliced with Thanos’ story is the present day struggle. The beginning of the movie we see the destroyed Asgardian ship with Thanos and his disciples taking out most of the leadership, but not before Heimdall uses the Bifrost to get Hulk back to Earth. We see Heimdall and Loki die and Thor left for dead before Thanos moves on with the Space Stone and already in possession of the Power Stone.

The story builds toward two separate teams. The space team with Iron Man, Spider-Man, Dr. Strange, Nebula, and the Guardians minus Rocket and Groot defend the Time Stone with the ultimate face off with Thanos on the collapsed planet Titan. Before that, Thanos had a skirmish with the Guardians on Knowhere before ultimately obtaining the Reality Stone from the Collector, kidnapping Gamora in the process. Thanos killed Gamora on the planet Vormir to obtain the Soul Stone. Before the fight on Titan, Dr. Strange looks into the future and sees 14 million possible outcomes and only one where they win. The Earth team with Captain America, Falcon, Black Widow, War Machine, Bruce Banner, Scarlett Witch, Vision, Black Panther, and the Wakandan military protect Vision while Shuri tries to unlink the Mind Stone to destroy without harming Vision while battling the Chitauri and some of Thanos’ disciples in Wakanda with Thor, Rocket, and Groot dropping in toward the end.

The space team almost grabs the gauntlet from Thanos but ultimately fail (partly due to Peter Quill’s temper after finding out Gamora was killed by Thanos). Thanos then descends to Earth into Wakanda and some of the Earth team, in particular Captain America holds him off long enough for Scarlett Witch to destroy the Mind Stone, killing her love Vision. But Thanos uses the Time Stone to turn Vision back long enough to restore the Mind Stone and obtain the last stone he was searching for. Right before he is able to snap his gauntlet fingers, Thor drops down with his new ax Stormbreaker, thrusting the ax into Thanos’ chest. But Thanos is still able to snap his fingers, dusting half the population of the universe including some of our heroes: in particular Black Panther, most of the Guardians, Dr. Strange, and, in probably the most emotional scene outside of Endgame, Spider-Man.

If you were a moviegoer in a previous era and didn’t know they were already shooting Spider-Man: Far From Home, the impact of The Snap would have resonated so much more. Even in this era, though, the ending of the film was sharp, jarring, and effective.

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That’s my list! I may revisit years down the line, and some of these movies may age better than others. But I feel pretty comfortable about where these movies ended up. Let me know what you think! And enjoy the home release of Avengers: Endgame!

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