#<--- said the guy who has beef with the french

[rene-spade]

Ok but how are the crazy f1 dads with their daughters dating? Who on the grid do they like?

oof this is a loaded ask bc they really are all out of it 😭 they just love their babies fr

♤ ♤ ♤

dad! kimi | growing up räikkönen!

FIRST OF ALL kimi doesn’t really vibe with most people in general, let alone anyone who’s trying to get with his little lumienkeli. kimi was lucky to raise a little girl similar to him, who listens when he places a no dating rule lasting until she’s 21 (as far as he knows anyways). despises the guys on the grid trying to get with her; he was one of them once so he thinks of them as animals, especially leclerc who’s known for his brow-raising dating life. also hates pierre but he already didn’t fw him bc he’s french. he is SLIGHTLY more easy going with women around his daughter so any grid guys with girlfriends might have an advantage. he finds that he wants the im-a-dog-and-ill-do-whatever-my-girl-says type for his daughter, but he dislikes unintelligence. he does not like anyone on the grid, but he best tolerates:

mick schumacher!

oscar piastri (+lily)

he vibes with kika okay but hates pierre 💀

bonus! he actually really likes max but his hate/distrust for jos overpowers that so he’s not letting that happen

♤ ♤ ♤

dad! jenson | growing up button!

OK SO JENSON is a bit less intense than kimi, however he is much more publicly affectionate with his daughter which means that he has definitely gone on public rants about how no man is good wen enough for his baby. that being said, he is a decent judge of character so he doesn’t hate anyone on the grid. but he gets real serious when he notices people hitting on his baby. this is mostly bc he was def a whore when he was younger so he isn’t quick to trust guys who are living the same lifestyle he was. he kind of turns on dad-mode when he notices anyone eyeing her up. but alas, he raised his own mini-me, who attracts just about everyone, and who likes to flirt back. it takes warming up to, but he can see himself fine with most of the drivers. he most prefers people who are friendly and who didn’t act like him when he was in f1 like:

george russel

daniel ricciardo

lando norris

♤ ♤ ♤

dad! fernando | growing up alonso!

NANDO IS DEFINITELY one of those guys who thinks he’s a “cool dad” bc he’s a young father and his daughter is his best friend. but in reality he’s one of those intense, fiercely overprotective dads who have impossibly high expectations for his daughters partner. 100% the type to punch a mechanic for saying gross things about his princesa. he’ll be calm and in a good mood then someone on the grid (or any man ever) mentions his daughter and he’s like 😐. UNLESS! it’s carlos. carlos is the only one who meets his standards, sorry to literally everyone else. but even with carlos, he can be a little stern just to get his point across about not messing with his only child. he just feels the need to personally approve of his daughter’s partner bc he’s hyper-paranoid about someone hurting her. his list looks something like:

carlos sainz!!!

that’s it

i mean if you put a gun to his head maybe max bc he’s a winner but he needs to learn to speak spanish so-

♤ ♤ ♤

dad! jos | growing up verstappen! unfortunately

FUCK JOS VERSTAPPEN obviously, however this man is one crazy dad who we have to discuss. his love for his youngest daughter is wild and unpredictable, and it’s very different from the way he treats his other children. his baby has some extreme one-sided beef with him that he’s smart enough to know about, so he isn’t too forceful about bonding, it’s definitely more desperate since max found success in f1 and she sticks with her big brother now. her entire life, he’s never allowed her to date, and when he found out about her first secret bf, he got arrested for trying to kill the kid so. he has IMPOSSIBLY high standards for his daughters partner and definitely wants her to marry within the f1 community, but he hates losers and despises half the grid.

suddenly he’s charles leclerc’s biggest fan !

lewis hamilton but he’ll never admit it

MAYBE carlos sainz

bonus! max obvi likes daniel ricciardo best but jos doesn’t fw him like that

♤ ♤ ♤

Ren

#dark! f1 #f1 fanfic #f1 fic #f1 grid x reader #obsessive f1 #carlos sainz x reader #charles leclerc x reader #f1 oc #f1 reverse harem #daniel riccardo x reader #max verstappen x reader #lando norris x reader #lewis hamilton x reader #kimi räikkönen x daughter reader #dad! jenson button #dad! fernando alonso #dad! kimi räikkönen #jos verstappen

[onesidedradiostatic]

Does Vox have any clue the person he's buying Alastor art from is THE King of Hell? Or is Lucifer's account anonymous? Alastor posed for at least one of those pictures, so now I'm picturing Vox coming to this realization and short circuiting over the thought of Lucifer and Alastor reenacting the 'draw me like one of your French girls' meme. Meanwhile, Lucifer and Alastor are only barely able to be in the same room again for the first time in weeks and they still can't make eye contact.

(ORIGINAL CONTEXT)

(draw me like one of your french girls ask)

(nitpicking val's art ask)

LMAOOO honestly my original idea was lucifer intentionally being sought out for the commission (but being anonymous could potentially be funny). answering these together cause. lucifer adding details about alastor that people wouldn't usually know about would probably clue vox in that oh. he had alastor model for him. ahahahhaahahahaah. ha. for THIS. also he probably knows...? that lucifer is living in the hotel with alastor at this point but now he would know that alastor was specifically also semi-involved in the commission. he also unintentionally aggravates alastor and lucifer's stupid beef because of this. so not only was his hate-crush semi-involved in his super-secret commission (which btw he got him to pose for him what the fuck?!!?!?!?? unFAIR <- does not know alastor thought it was just going to be a normal portrait) but said commission also aggravated his rival's beef with someone else FUCK and then he tries to start beef with alastor again over nothing to draw his attention back to him and then it becomes a three-way rivalry (lucifer thinks tv scrambles the brain) until lucifer realises that vox is his commissioner and shouts "OH YOU'RE THE GUY WHO COMMISSIONED THAT ALBERT BODY PILLOW??????" and alastor is standing there like "!?!?!?!???????????????????????????????????????????????????" and then vox dies and season 2 ends

#ask #osrs.txt #lucifer broke their nda but he's king of hell so it doesn't even matter #radiostatic #staticradio #onewaybroadcast #hazbin vox #hazbin hotel vox #lucifer morningstar #hazbin lucifer #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #lucifer's commissions saga

[bruciemilf]

,,,, russian bruce wayne

Russian Bruce Wayne

RUSSIAN BRUCE WAYNE -

Listen. Listen. Not fully compacted into something coherent, but I'll do my best, because this idea has been haunting me, -

SO he's russian on his mother's side!! Martha Wayne immigrated in America when she was a teenager, nothing to her name but hope in her chest and her mother's pearl necklace in her pocket

She always got ugly looks for speaking in her native language and her accent. Slowly, it melted into something perfectly English, but she still spoke Russian at home and especially to Bruce

Little Bruce loved Baba Yaga as a kid and dressed like her for Halloween every single year; Nobody really understood it, but a glare from Alfred was enough to fill a bag full of candy

Martha and Bruce would talk shit in front of Thomas' faux philanthropist friends, but they were on wildly different spectrums

Martha, whispering: You see that man, Brucie? He sold his soul to greed. He's a worm of a human and his morals are rotten. That's why his eyes are dead

Bruce: haha, he's balding at 25

Martha, Alfred, and Bruce cooking beef stroganoff, syriniki, borscht, and Bruce's absolute favorite- pirozhki.

Martha also played the piano and LOVED Swan Lake so, so much. It was the one song that calmed Bruce during night terrors.

When he reaches eight, it all stops.

He eventually reconnects with his Russian roots in his 20s, when he's in college and his literature teacher shares a DISRESPECTFULLY incorrect opinion about one of Dostoevsky's works.

His teacher scoffed, " Well. Didn't know we had a Russian citizen here. "

" Not a citizen, but I AM a Russian descendent. My mother was an immigrant. That's kind of how America was formed. It's a pretty significant thing that happened."

Imagine you're a Gotham criminal and Batman starts muttering things about you in Russian. Somehow that's even more intimidating than anything he does.

" I can't believe they're more afraid of someone who doesn't speak English than a guy who beats up people dressed as a bat."

Alfred hums, sloooowly pulling away the vodka cereal Bruce made. " I can't imagine why. You're the poster child for mental health, sir."

" Not funny, papachka"

" For you."

When Dick is brought into the nest, Bruce struggles a bit with showing his affections; He only has money to offer, but Dick is happily uninterested in that, and seeks Bruce out instead.

BRUCE ABSOLUTELY SPENDS AN ENTIRE NIGHT TRYING TO PERFECT HIS MOTHER'S BAKLAVA FOR DICK!!

yes he's supposed to be on patrol. No, he doesn't care, Jim. It's all worth it when Dick takes a single bite and he has stars in his eyes and vines his little but strong arms around him, " this is PERFECT! Thank you so much, dad"

Air freezes in his blood, " ... Of course, ptichka."

He absolutely uses russian proverbs all the time (mostly when his children need to be reprimanded and reminded that making jokes is illegal when they're on duty)

JASON AND BRUCE FIGHTING OVER TRANSLATIONS AND CONTEXT IN ENGLISH ADAPTATIONS OF SLAVIC LITERATURE!

" PAPI, THAT'S NOT WHAT THEY MEANT TO SAY!"

" MISKHA I'M SO GRATEFUL YOUR GRANDMA ISN'T HERE, BECAUSE SHE'D DIE AGAIN IF SHE HEARD YOU SAY THAT!"

Damian 100000% prides himself on knowing russian and communicating with Bruce the smoothest.

It becomes a competition soon enough. Bruce is SO tired but the way they butcher words is funny, so he just pretends they're right.

The League finds out when Bruce snaps and calls Hal Cyka in a low, angry mutter while stomping away from his stupidity. " ... Bless you? What did he call me?"

Diana, struggling so hard not to laugh. " He said you were a genius."

" Huh. Had no idea he was French."

Meanwhile Clark is losing HIS shit because wow, Bruce's russian might be the hottest thing he ever heard. Please, this dork would absolutely try to learn Russian and talk to Bruce more.

He's absolutely horrible with it but Bruce is just very excited. He definetly chuckles (which. Wow. Clark couldn't even make him GRIN 3 weeks ago) " You just asked me if I sleep with my dentist."

" ...Oh. I...Was trying to ask you for drinks. You can kill me right now. Please?"

" Maybe another time, solnyshko. Take me for a drink first."

Clark inhales. " oKaY thank yoU."

#he means everything to me #bruce wayne #the batman #batman #dc #dc comics #headcanons #writing #my writing #batkids #batfam #batfamily #dick grayson #jason todd #damian wayne #clark kent #superman #superbat #translations: ask google lmao #text #text post

[leclsrc]

prompt 35 with Charles????

everyone adores you – cl16

genre: fluff, drabble, 1k celebration

35: an awkward kiss given after a first date. title from this

Charles loves the story of your first date. He tells it often, over wine nights with the drivers or Secret Santa exchanges with friends. Over a glass of red or a fake Santa beard, he quells the room and goes: “Did I ever tell you guys the story of our first date?” And although everyone groans and lets out a bunch of affirmative answers, still he meets your eye from across the room, where you’re nursing white wine, or wearing an elf hat, and you smile, winking.

“Okay then!” He hollers, miming a shush motion. “No need to pressure me! I’ll tell it.”

And everyone groans again, a collective sigh, because Charles loves to pull out his best theatrics for your love story, and it means sitting through another living room one man play. Alex pretends to stand and get up, and Lily sloshes her wine or tugs her Santa hat off in her hurry to pull him beside her, because she loves the story so much. Max groans and slides onto the floor, spilling his vino or shedding his ugly fleece sweater.

You’re always silent when Charles insists on telling it because, although you fully understand the sarcastic disappointment, you also know that everyone loves the story deep down, loves your boyfriend’s goofy antics. And his storytelling aside, you’ll admit: your first date was the stuff of films.

Set up by Lewis (who continues to claim it was his worst mistake during gatherings like these), you’d met in London, where you were based for work at the time. Charles arranged the whole thing himself, with the pride of a six-year-old with a messy drawing, and looked up the best restaurants in the area. You met him outside the expensive-looking restaurant, and—

“—she goes, ‘I hope you’re paying for everything!’ and I go, ‘of course I will!’” Charles says energetically, the whole room watching him with amusement. He slides back and forth on your wooden floor, playing both you and himself, and then when it reaches that point of the story, the snooty French restaurant host: “He goes, ‘how may I help you, zir and madmwasel?’ and I go, ‘oh, I called you the other day—to reserve a table for two. Under Leclerc.’”

You looked expectantly at the host’s finger sliding through the seating chart, flipping a page, sliding through another, and then looking up with an unsmiling face. His expression said it all, and you were getting ready to leave when Charles began arguing, insisting he really did reserve a table, maybe you just can’t spell, I called your number, here it is.

“And the French host, he says, ‘zir, zis is not our number. Our number endz in 5-4-0, not 5-0-4.’” Charles pauses for dramatic effect even if everybody knows what happens next, holding his arms up. “You might be wondering, where did I reserve that table?”

“Nobody is wondering,” Pierre quips, wearing a Christmas tree sweater. Yuki swats him quiet, wearing the exact same one. 

“It was in a chicken shop down the street. So we ate there, she and I,” Charles says dramatically. “And I kept thinking, oh oh oh I’ve fucked it up, yes? No!” (A bit.) “We ate chicken and chips, and had soda, and I learned everything about her. We were probably expecting to eat steak and beef and drink wine”—he raises a glass—“but we made do. And I don’t regret it. But that’s not all!”

It isn’t. Your night had ended in front of your flat, still laughing over anecdotes shared in-between bites of chips and sips of Coke. Work awaited the both of you, so you made a flimsy excuse to go inside and thanked him for bringing you home. But you didn’t walk inside yet, like you were waiting for something.

“Something like a signature Charles kiss,” your boyfriend says proudly. “But nothing was good about the kiss. I leaned and she didn’t, and we were both stiff, and unprepared.” Everyone has a window to laugh despite themselves, because the way he describes you both is so unlike how you are now. It’s so unbelievable, it’s silly. And even you allow a laugh, hiding behind your giant glass of wine or pulling the elf hat over your shy eyes.

You’d kissed, stiff and cold, and pulled away fully aware of the stiffness and coldness of the kiss. You had smiled to try and play off the stiff cold kiss that still lingered, and then opened the door to your flat and shut it. In your head, you wondered if your chemistry seemed good in the chicken shop and then ultimately wilted when it came to everything else.

“So I stood there.” Charles says, sipping wine, hand on hip, like a middle-aged mom. “And I thought, no way am I going to let that beautiful girl go home without a proper kiss! So…”

You were still leaning against the door, not even toeing off your shoes, when it rattled thrice. You swung it open, and allowed him to kiss you then. This time it felt right somehow. Not stiff, not cold, not awkward. Turns out, you just needed to not think about it, and it became the most memorable first kiss you’d ever had.

He finishes the story, panting with the intensity of his acting. Scattered clapping meets the finale and you whoop, throwing your hat or a throw pillow to serve as a congratulatory rose. You’ve grown to realize that Charles’ stories of wins, victories, overlaps—they never go like this. He’s quieter, less excited. But for the story of your first date, he pulls out all the stops.

You wonder what comes next. Charles, though: he wonders if you’ve noticed the indent of the ring box in his jeans pocket, an introduction to a story for another day.

#f1 #leclsrc1000 #charles leclerc #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc imagines #charles leclerc drabble #charles leclerc smut #charles leclerc fluff #f1 x reader

[blues824]

Continuing the TWST Boys Go to Reader's World??? headcanons, can I have the Third Years this time?

Reader is mentioned and only pronouns used are secondary pronouns. The amount of research going into this 😥😥

Trey Clover

Favorite Country/City: A lot of treats that he makes are from France, so I believe he would love being on the tasting side of the whole ordeal. Plus, candied violets (originally called violettes cristallisees) originate from there as well. As for his favorite city, it’s basic but it’s Paris. It’s the dessert capital of France, so yeah.

Favorite Cuisine/Dish: He is a bit of a connoisseur when it comes to multiple different cuisines, as people from all over have come to his family’s bakery. However, if he had to choose one, it would have to be Spanish cuisine. He just strikes me as the type. French food would come in second, but we are going by entrees and not desserts.

Favorite Drink: I feel like he would be a bit tired of tea, and coffee goes well with a lot of sweets but sometimes he wants something else. So, hot chocolate is a great go-to. Plus, you can spike it with bourbon or rum and many other things, and he prefers bourbon.

Favorite Souvenir: A cognac that he has used to cook multiple different things. He picked it up at a small shop in France, and the brandy is great for making sauces and for deglazing a pan. He rarely drinks it, but it’s of great quality.

Favorite Singers/Songs: He is an old soul, and with that being said, he likes older music. I feel like he would like songs in different languages as well. So, I think he would like the song Nunca es Suficiente, the Natalia Lafourcade version.

Favorite Movie: He doesn’t have a favorite movie, but rather favorite shows. He loves Nailed It!, Zumbo’s Just Desserts, Sugar Rush, but most importantly: The Great British Baking Show.

Cater Diamond

Favorite Country/City: This guy is hard because he would want to go absolutely everywhere and he would love everywhere he travels to. However, he would say that he loved Japan the most, as the people were very friendly and it was the first time he actually tried hard to learn the language so that he could be respectful.

Favorite Cuisine/Dish: His canonical favorite food is spicy ramen, so I would say Japanese cuisine would be his favorite. But, he has a more diverse taste than just that, so he would probably like Eastern Asian cuisine as a whole. It has a lot of savory and spicy foods that he absolutely loves.

Favorite Drink: He is also a margarita lover, and even though a lot of them are sweet, they are still delicious. However, he orders salt rather than sugar on the rim of the cup because he doesn’t want extra sweetness from sugar.

Favorite Souvenir: He picked up a pair of chopsticks that he always uses. He has finally got chopstick etiquette down, and the set he purchased at a souvenir shop served as a reminder of his hard work.

Favorite Singers/Songs: He is so into both K-Pop and J-Pop that it’s not even funny. He is one of those fans that will tear you up if you didn’t know the words, their meaning, who all the members in the specific group are, etc.

Favorite Movie: I had no idea he was into skateboarding, so I have to say that his favorite movie is Dogtown and Z-Boys. It’s a documentary-type film about the Zephyr skateboard team who helped develop modern skateboarding in the ‘70’s.

Leona Kingscholar

Favorite Country/City: He is not one to travel voluntarily, so you would have to drag him places. He does want to spoil you, so he will (hesitantly) go along with you. If he had to choose a favorite, it would be Sudan. He doesn’t have a favorite city, but rather a favorite state: the River Nile state. It holds the Meroë Pyramids, and he thought it was pretty cool that Sudan has the most pyramids in the world.

Favorite Cuisine: Pretty far from Sudan, but Argentinian food would be his favorite. They are known for having the best beef, and Leona loves having a good steak. The only downside is that it’s usually served with a few veggies or a chimichurri sauce composed of vegetables.

Favorite Drink: He doesn’t really care, so I would think that he likes beer. He strikes me as the type to have a glass bottle of beer that he holds nearer to his hip; the traditional uncle (Unca) pose.

Favorite Souvenir: When he first went to Sudan, he dressed to fit along with local traditions. He wore a jalabiya in order to maintain modesty, and he actually liked it and hung it in his closet for the next time he visited a country that prefers modesty.

Favorite Singers/Songs: It started as him getting into his edgy phase, but he did not want to go emo. He prefers rock, specifically AC/DC. His favorite song is Highway to Hell.

Favorite Movie: He usually falls asleep during every movie he watches. However, he did like the movie Silence of the Lambs. The way it left him disturbed and on-guard as well as made him want to stay awake is the reason why he would like such a gruesome movie.

Vil Schoenheit

Favorite Country/City: Cologne, Germany. I’ve always wanted to visit, and it was one of my hyperfixations for a while, but that’s besides the point. The point is that Vil strives for perfection. Part of that is smelling great. Surprise, surprise: cologne originates from Cologne. However, the Cologne Cathedral was beautiful as well.

Favorite Cuisine: I feel like he would like Japanese food as his go-to, as a lot of their food is a lot healthier than others and he strives to be healthy. However, he would like Greek food if he were just going off of personal preference. Briam would probably be his favorite dish.

Favorite Drink: Do smoothies count as food or drinks? People have them for breakfast as they have fruits and veggies, but you ‘drink’ a smoothie. Anyways, his favorite alcoholic drink would be a martini. He is classy and elegant, just like the drink.

Favorite Souvenir: A piece of the Berlin Wall. The history behind it fascinated Vil, and he considers it his most prized souvenir.

Favorite Singers/Songs: Lovefool by Postmodern Jukebox (feat. Haley Reinhart). He heard it from a co-star, and he liked it. Yes, he continues his career in your world.

Favorite Movie: Breakfast at Tiffany’s, as I believe that he loves Audrey Hepburn’s acting in that movie. He also likes Gentlemen Prefer Blondes because of Marilyn Monroe and her iconic character in that movie.

Rook Hunt

Favorite Country/City: The city of love, the city of lights, Paris. As much as I didn’t want to do such a basic answer, he is a connoisseur of beauty, and Paris at night is a sight to behold. Plus, he speaks French, so why not go to the motherland of the French language?

Favorite Cuisine: His favorite food is canonically liver pâté, so I believe he would love French cuisine the most. However, I would say that Danish cuisine comes second, as they have something similar (a dish that is derived from liver pâté: leverpostej).

Favorite Drink: A French 75 goes a long way with this man. He loves a champagne cocktail. They are typically for celebrations, and Rook just wishes to celebrate life and beauty as a whole. No, he’s not an alcoholic, but when he feels content and exceedingly happy he won’t hesitate in indulging himself with one glass.

Favorite Souvenir: A lavender perfume. He loves how relaxing the smell is.

Favorite Singers/Songs: His favorite song is Love Like You, by Caleb Hyles. Look at the lyrics, and you will see why lol.

Favorite Movie: The Notebook, as it’s a classic film filled with romance. You also cannot tell me that this man is not looking for the Allie to his Noah. He wants a romance story in his life, and that’s why he travels so much.

Idia Shroud

Favorite Country/City: I can’t decide between Greece and Japan, so I will say that they are tied on Idia’s list. The gamer boy doesn’t really go outside, but when he traveled to these places he absolutely loved it. He’s kind of simple, where he liked the capitals Athens and Tokyo the most.

Favorite Cuisine: His favorite food is just listed as ‘sweets’, and he hates raw fish. We are not going by desserts, but rather overall food, and luckily fish can be replaced by protein alternatives. Plus, the fish can be cooked. That being said, Chinese food would be his favorite. He loves the dragon’s beard candy.

Favorite Drink: He rarely ever drinks alcoholic drinks, as he is already very weak in build (remember his family’s curse?). Adding alcohol to the mix would be a disaster. However, he might like a light beer.

Favorite Souvenir: He likes board games, and while he was in Greece he learned to play Tavli, or Backgammon, and he purchased a board so that he could continue to play it with opponents.

Favorite Singers/Songs: He likes anime intros and outros, and like Cater he is very big on K-Pop and J-Pop, but also C-Pop and T-Pop. His favorite song is 夜に駆ける(Yoru ni Kakeru), by YOASOBI.

Favorite Movie: Your Name, as the two travel just to meet each other, but they have to get used to their new environments first.

Malleus Draconia

Favorite Country/City: He loves Denmark’s castles, but specifically the Rosenborg Castle in Copenhagen. It houses the Danish Crown Jewels as well as the Coronation Robe, and the history behind each item fascinated the draconian prince. The Notre Dame Cathedral in France comes in second for its gargoyles.

Favorite Cuisine: Again, we go by overall cuisine rather than the desserts (otherwise he would choose the cuisines that contributed to ice cream’s existence). He actually can’t choose a favorite, as all is better than Lilia’s cooking. He does have a least favorite, and it’s modern American food. His favorite type of food is street food, as it really allows him to surround himself with the locals and just be normal.

Favorite Drink: He doesn’t believe alcohol is necessary to have fun, but he will indulge himself from time to time. His favorite is a cocktail called a ‘Corpse Reviver’. It’s a morbid name, but it’s the one thing that magic can’t do. He likes when red food coloring is added, as it makes his tongue red.

Favorite Souvenir: Bro probably has enough money to actually purchase the Danish Crown Jewels as well as the English Crown Jewels tbh. Anyways, he actually treasures a book he picked up called ‘Once Upon a Broken Heart’. He was unaware that it was the first book of a sequel series, so he purchased the rest as well as the original series, ‘Caraval’.

Favorite Singers/Songs: His talent is listed as ‘stringed instruments’, but his relent would go beyond just the typical instruments you think of. Is an electric guitar not a stringed instrument? This man is in a 5 Finger Death Punch phase, favorite song being Wrong Side of Heaven.

Favorite Movie: He loves Sleeping Beauty, mostly because of that scene with Aurora and Prince Phillip where they dance together in the forest. Also, he related to Maleficent because she was not invited to see the princess.

Lilia Vanrouge

Favorite Country/City: His hobby is traveling alone, and I feel like he wouldn’t have a favorite location. He has been everywhere, and the only place he gravitated towards was Brazil. He went to that year’s Carnaval celebration and he actually really liked it. The parade floats were big and beautiful, there were many lights; it was just fun in general. The city of São Paulo comes to mind, as it’s the biggest city by population.

Favorite Cuisine: Part of why he likes Brazil is the food. Tomatoes originate from South America, and Brazil’s dishes hit different (I don’t think I’ve been to an authentic Brazilian food place, but from what I can see and from what I’ve tasted, I love it).

Favorite Drink: In the Trivia section of his Wiki page, it says that he likes potions that are said to taste bitter by everyone else. That being said, I feel like this would transfer to alcoholic drinks, so his favorite drink might be a negroni. It’s a bit bitter, so it suits his taste.

Favorite Souvenir: He picked up some spices in his travels to “better” his cooking (it didn’t help at all; his cooking still sucks even if he’s seen other people do the dishes he's trying to make).

Favorite Singers/Songs: He is what boomers would call “hip and trendy”, so he likes whatever is popular at the moment. Yes, this includes the meme songs that might go viral on TikTok, Instagram, and YT Shorts. At the time of writing this, his favorite song would be Paint the Town Red, by Doja Cat.

Favorite Movie: He liked the movie Crimson Peak. The costumes as well as the acting were amazing, and he loves learning about the Victorian Era and how both England and the United States were developing during the industrial era.

#twst #twst x reader #disney twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland #disney twst #twisted wonderland x reader #twst wonderland #trey #twst trey x reader #trey clover x reader #trey x reader #twst trey #trey clover #twst trey clover x reader #twst trey clover #cater x reader #twst cater #cater diamond x reader #cater diamond #cater #twst cater diamond x reader #twst cater diamond #twst cater x reader #leona #twst leona x reader #twst leona #leona kingscholar x reader #leona x reader #leona kingscholar #twst leona kingscholar x reader

[meirimerens]

god thank you for your response to that person I'm so tired of seeing takes that are like "the kin/the town are a 1:1 representation of the buryats" cuz... they're not... and honestly trying to hammer that point down comes off as quite insulting to the real and actual people they're supposedly represent.

the kin differs from the buryats by their economical system, faith and even medicine methods. the closest thing is the language cuz surprise, unless you're tolkien, coming up with a whole fictional language is hard

well, thank you, i'll guess. i'm not trying to start beef with nobody so everybody behave otherwise daddy's gonna get rude.

i also truly fully whole-heartedly believe the replier has no ill-intention, and probably has great love for the Kin (hence why they entered the discussion). it is also from great love for the Kin that i made the original post, AND from great love that i made my reply to the reply, which i felt ignored some issues that have for years been brought up + decided to seek the opinions of others who have more #knowledge than me.

wrt the kin i'm trying to like, be as... wide in my scope of it as i can and understand that yes, imaginary, bunch of shit not real, but also, very much real inspirations, and in these blurred lines of inspirations/imagination lies..... won't lie some racist biases, and perhaps what we could call intellectual colonialism: taking bits and pieces of real-life cultures for your Storey, while maybe not...... handling it.... the best........ again, i'm not like. The Best Person For The Job because. my sibling on this green earth i'm franco-french. but i try my best to read and listen what is said about the Kin by people for who their (mis)treatment matters most, and most of what i'm reading is. like Not Praise. ykwim..... i have no way of knowing if you, personally, are buryat or mongol or [...] & it's none my business, so i don't know how much of a horse you got in this race, but i'm trying to like. see things. a topic that demands careful examination and multiple perspectives? in the Multiple Perspectives video games? that's crazy.

there's also to me [as a storytellah] the fact that if patho wanted to fully represent all the peoples it is inspired by 1) it would be even more of a hodgepodge, and somewhat even more disrespectful, because the buryat and the mongols, while both Mongolic, are... not the same... they have different names for gods, places, different cosmogonies, [...]. the fact is, patho has multiple inspirations, and like. they're not... interchangeable... because central asian cultures are not interchangeable...... not monolithic......... and 2) it would make it so they can't go as quirky with the story as they did. the religion, the practices, the cosmogonies are invented (if inspired), and are not 1:1 to actual cultures. making it 1:1 to actual cultures would be disrespectful because you'd just... shove a new, fake religion upon these actually-existing peoples. or, you would have to write within the religious traditions of these peoples, which make it so. well. no living beating heart under the town, no albinos, no herb brides, no worms. you can make documentary-like games (i'd argue you should), but i think another thing that can/should be done is games by indigenous people about indigenous people and myths/stories, in the vein of "Never Alone (Kisima Ingitchuna)", by Iñupiat people, with an Iñupiaq main character, about Iñupiat stories/myths. we've discussed it in the big guy but lead writer D., being 1/16 Chinese, perhapssss doesn't really have the same relationship to the Central Asian cultures the Kin is inspired by as someone who is Buryat, or white/Buryat (like artemy), would have.

but at this core, i don't think patho wants to full represent the people it's inspired by. it's a story. it's interested in making a story. to me it appears it's interested in making associations and parallels, maybe even homages?, but never actual direct correlations or representation (which itself can be another discussion. the kin is obviously central asian, from central-asian inspirations: how much of it can be seen as representation? how much of it as appropriation?) it makes up fake people for its fake town dealing with its fake illness. all of those have foundations, have obvious, legible roots, but they're not the same, and i'd argue it's... more disrespectful pretending the kin is 100% [ethnicity] (because. uh. [70 pages document about the mistreatment of the Kin])

(i also think this... """blurred line"""... allows for a... in-game and out-of-game [esp. fandom] a certain like. distance. or maybe suspension of disbelief. about the racism. like "oh, they're not a real culture, therefore i'm not showing Actually Racist(tm) biases when i depict members of the Kin as engaging in ritualistic sexual abuse, as being sexually violating or violent,..., because they're Not Real, so it's okay" which is. methinks somewhat braindead take. seen with my two eyes against my will to be fair)

tldr

An Imaginary People that's Not Real while taking from obvious inspirations because that's what you do when you write a story; you make shit up, especially if you plan on getting quirky wit it in ways no Actual Culture is because you're putting. Worms and the living beating Heart under the town and a Tower that defies the laws of physics (fake and gay?) and nobody.. has those. + it'd be way weirder if those women you're killing and making sexualize themselves were meant to be Real Ethnicity. i'd argue that'd be worse. so yeah. imagined. HOWEVERRRRRR[1][2][3][4][5]

#i keep repeating myself but i reiterate i'm sure lead writer's ancestry Does influence his work and his game(s) i'm sure of it. i'm sure it #influenced his vision of the Kin. & i got no ground to stand on personally about this. but 1) different And Not Interchangeable ethnicities #2) a chinese great-grandmother is not the same as a central asian father. in the same way the Kin is not a 1:1 to any culture; artemy is no #a 1:1 to dybowski. #THANK GOD! (cf. : the allegations) #ring ring (answers) #anonymous #tldr complex. also i'm not the best person to talk bout these things but as someone who storytells + makes shit up + loves loves LOVEEESS #to learn about cultures all across the steppe [& their relation to the environment SPECIFICALLY] i'm like. we treading lightly. we treading #but lightly. and carefully.

[mermaidsirennikita]

Any HR with gothic vibes you would recommend?

Yes!

Anne Stuart is known for writing darker, more gothic-y historicals. I've only read A Rose at Midnight so far, but I know her Rohan series is recommended for this a lot. I loved A Rose at Midnight. It's set shortly after the French Revolution (set in England, largely) and the heroine literally begins the book wanting to kill the hero. She does poison him! He just survives lmao. But yeah, the beef is real, it's pretty dark (TW for noncon, dubcon, forced sex work, general Reign of Terror violence) and there's a general sense of violence and mystery and secrets.

Elizabeth Hoyt plays with the Gothic a lot. I'd recommend:

The Raven Prince. Really a sexy Jane Eyre, the heroine is the hero's secretary and ends up putting on a mask and pretending to be a sex worker at a brothel he frequents in order to sleep with him. (To be very fair to her, he was only visiting the brothel because he was avoiding their intense sexual tension.) But yeah, he sweeping around his manor, he's doing the high drama. it's GREAT.

The Leopard Prince. This is more "we're out on the moors, the natural world is here, the are murders and mysterious sheep kilings" Gothic. The heroine inherits an estate and moves there, only to begin an affair with her gruff steward, who's basically on the brink of being framed for murder. It's HOOOOOT.

All of the Dolphin Sex Cult books in Maiden Lane kinda have this vibe, but TW because the cult is heavily involved in pedophilia. The heroes and heroines are trying to stop it. These books consist of:

Duke of Sin. Insane villainous hero, hides in his walls watching the heroine (who's his housekeeper and has been planted in his house in order to steal blackmail material he owns from him) for like... 3-4 months. She doesn't even know he's there. He's truly wild. But he is trying to... avenge his sister... because their father was in the Dolphin Sex Cult? It's complex.

Duke of Pleasure. In this one, the hero is a king's bastard, actively trying to take down the Dolphin Sex Cult. The heroine is a street urchin who's often dressed as a boy in order to stay safe; she's also a vigilante. He recruits her to help him, while also teaching her to pass as a lady. This one involves the infamous "ummmm people are about to catch us, quick suck my dick for cover" and she just doesn't stop when the people go away and swallows.

Duke of Desire. This one is really intense and dark. The hero kidnaps the heroine to prevent her from falling prey to the villains, and forces her to marry him for the same reasons. She's like "I can deal with this, but I want a baby" which he refuses because he has a lot of sexual trauma related to the cult (TW for childhood SA).

The Ghost of St. Giles arc in Maiden Lane is also on that wavelength--it's all about this masked vigilante who skulks the night. Turns out the identity is shared by several different guys!

Thief of Shadows. The Winter Makepeace book. Our hero is a schoolmaster/orphanage master guy, and he runs around as the Ghost, while by day a rich society widow tutors him on how to solicit donations from patrons and do polite society right. Said widow catches on to his game, and they begin this intense passionate secret affair while he's also dealing with Ghost stuff.

Lord of Darkness. The next Ghost is a quiet widower who married again a few years ago in order to save a young woman he barely knew from ruin when she got pregnant out of wedlock and her lover died before they could make it legal. She miscarried right after the wedding, and wants a baby now, so she's back in town wanting to finally consummate the marriage. He agrees, but he's withholding the Secret while they try for a baby.

Duke of Midnight. Georgian Batman with heavy Gothic tones. Our hero is a tortured duke whose parents were killed in front of him, and ever since he's desired REVENGE. The heroine is a lady's companion with a dark past who's trying to regain her former station and free her imprisoned brother, and she catches on to his vigilante activities and is like "mmm you're gonna help me or I'm gonna tell everyone thaaanks".

If you want something on the kinkier side, Sierra Simone's Ivy Leavold trilogy (which must be read in order) is a kinky Jane Eyre, basically, with very Gothic overtones. Sierra looooves the Gothic. It's super hot and really fun.

Scarlett Peckham's The Duke I Tempted has a Gothic "I married a mysterious man and he has secrets I must discover" vibe. Of course, his secret is that he's submissive in bed, but there are other things too! The Earl I Ruined has similar vibes, but less so.

#romance novel blogging #romance novels #book recs

[magicxc]

Hills and Valleys

Synopsis: Legend has it that Halloween is strictly for the scares. With ghouls and goblins, vampires and werewolves, witches and broomsticks, who could disagree?

However, all this friend group wanted was a little trick or treat. Sprinkle in a few party favors, loud music, and a cabin in the woods, the myth was bound to come true. 

Lurking around the corner is danger like never before, eager to bring this night to a bloody finish. 

So join these friends as they fight to make it through a Halloween they’ll never forget, proving that "the scare" is more than just a fantasy.

Word Count: 1573

Warnings: drowning

Chapter 2 - Julianna’s POV

Series Masterlist

“Let’s fucking gooooooo,” I yell into the crowd. 

I don’t know what it is about LMFAO that gets me pumped, but they’re definitely a vibe. That group was inescapable in 2012 and then they just fell off the face of the earth, damn. 

But before I can contemplate it any further, a drink is being pushed into my hands by none other than the fender bender himself. Man, I haven’t seen that asshole on tv since adult swim was poppin. 

“Is this that Jekyll and Gin?” I shout over the music. 

“Nah, this that beetlejuice,” they answered. 

Eyeing the cup for potential bugs, I shrug my shoulders and take it to the head cause lets be real, the craziest names yield the best taste. 

Next thing I know is that I’m ass up face down in the middle of the dancefloor bussing the meanest of whines for Freddy Kruger. And if I hear another Megan Thee Stallion song, Imma show him why she really calls us hotties. 

But unfortunately for him, inebriated me has the tendency to fake an accent or two, though I usually don’t know which one will get the chance to shine until the drunk meter hits full. 

“Sacre bleu nigga, Im tryna throw this ass back on youuu. So open your arms wide, bend those knees, and catch it ohh ouiiii.”

“Girl you play too fucking much,” he retorted. 

So apparently the accent of the day is French.

We dance on each other for a few more songs, my ass firmly placed in his hands while his pelvis roughly grinds into me; our bodies cradled together as we move to the rhythm of the beat. Slick comments like “get a room” or “use a condom” get thrown at us and it’s then that I leave for a breather before I fuck him there and then.  

Unwrapping myself from his arms, I get ready to go, promising that I’ll be back while he smacks my ass in return. Deciding on a cup of water before I step outside for some fresh air, I make a beeline for the kitchen damn near knocking over Lynn in the process. 

“Woahhh where’s the fire,” she jokes. 

“In my vagina,” I yell. “Freddy Krugers big dick gave my ass two muthafucking heartbeats bitch.”

“You whore, you smashed on the first night?” 

“No, but I’m about to,” I smirked. 

“Shittt join the team, I smashed the first night and became a girlfriend.”

“Girl when haven't you?”

Shrugging her shoulders, she downs the last of her drink as her beefy military guy comes up and snakes his arms around her waist; an acknowledging nod thrown my way. 

“Jason, right?”

“All day.”

“I’d love to stay and talk, but I’m legit burning from the inside out,” I said, fanning myself. 

“I think Lorenzo left the backdoor open,” Jason pointed out. “I’ve seen people in and out that thing all night.”

“Mhmm, yeah take a breather and air that cat out before you buss it wide open.”

“Fuck you!” I laughed, middle finger high in the air. “Honestly I’m surprised I’ve made it this long at his party as is.”

“At the rate you’re going, we’ll probably have to haul you out of here,” Jason chirped. 

“Y’all aren't still ‘beefing’ are you?”

“You know how he goes Lynn, if Lenny does nothing else he’ll hold a grudge.”

“Just give it some time.” 

About two months ago Lenny threw a surprise party for himself, however the fuck that works, and invited the usual crew and then some. He rented out a party hall because quite frankly we were tired of helping him clean up after his usual weekend shenanigans; and it was his birthday so ideally he wanted to get fucked up without being responsible for any mess he made. 

As the night goes on we’re all chopping it up and getting lit and I spy this gorgeous girl, I’m talking ten out of ten baddie. Now I’m far from shy, especially when it comes to something that I want, so I slid over to her, hit her with some of my best lines and made that shit official like a referee with a whistle. We end up clicking instantly. She’s downing drinks back to back with me, fucking up the dance floor with me, and even tried her hands at skiing the slopes for the first time. 

All in all things are going better than expected, hell I'm starting to think it's my birthday. At some point, we start taking body shots and somehow her trying to wedge the lime from my teeth ends with us liplocking, that slice of citrus long forgotten as it hits the floor. Our makeout session ends abruptly, both of us yanked apart with a fuming Lenny in front of us. 

Apparently she was a coworker of his who he’d been eyeing for a minute and I swooped in and ruined the possibility of something more. But the thing is, he had no chances with this woman in the first place and had he paid close enough attention through those bullshit conversations that he forced on her in the break room, he would’ve realised that sis was gay. 

Truth be told, I bruised his ego more than anything. And the fact that he pulled such a stunt like that, in his drunken state, in front of friends, family and coworkers has him a little more embarrassed than he lets on. 

I think Lenny is the bees knees and I would’ve never approached his crush had I known, but it still stings that he’s essentially beating a dead horse. I feel like he tolerates me these days because of the crew and quite frankly I’m over the silly nonsense. He’s my absolute fave of the bunch, our personalities being so similar and all. But after tonight he’ll hear everything I have to say whether he likes it or not. 

“Anyway I’m off to, as you so eloquently put it, air this cat out,” I joke. “Later sugar.”

“Dammit, is nothing sacred?” She screams. 

Chuckling, I make it to the back door, walking over to one of the nearby trees to light a joint. Bringing it to my lips, I inhale the smoky goodness, eyelids heavy from fun. Swallowing it down, I rest my head against the branch as the crunching of leaves takes me out of my daze. 

Spinning around, a small smile dangles at the corner of my lips as I eye the familiar face. Exhaling, I hand over the joint, a question that doesn’t need to be asked. Hands swiping over mine, the blunt slides from my fingers and between their lips in response; a newfound sense of serenity as we enjoy the low thumping of the music. 

Halloween aside, autumn is my absolute favorite season for the beautiful, warm colors that it produces - from the red tinted leaves, to the orange pumpkins, and the golden sunsets. The air is crispier and the breeze blows a little cooler and the wind tastes a little fresher. I don’t know but it’s something about the way the earth turns on its axis around this time of year that brings a newfound joy to me. 

Eyes closed in blissful solace, I listen in as another crunching of the leaves ensues, only this time I’m the reason for the noise. A fist to my jaw has my face slamming against the tree trunk, body tumbling to the ground as I try my best to recover from the force of it all. 

Hands desperately grabbing at the earth, dirt and debris get painfully wedged underneath my fingernails, watching the droplets of blood seep into the soil. 

Trying my best to scramble up off the ground in my drunken state, a kick to my temple makes all my efforts futile, vision blurring as I lose my fight with consciousness. 

|~~

My body feels cold and heavy, lungs intensely burning while my head feels an insane amount of pressure. Eyes shooting open, I see what looks to be the moon, a full one at that. Can you imagine, a full moon on Halloween? I see the universe has a sense of humor. 

I feel my body sink further into the cold, wet depths, limbs thrashing against whatever has me restrained and it occurs to me that I may not be able to talk my way out of this one. The more I struggle, the more water pours into my lungs, filling my chest with a fiery ache; salty tears submerged as my nose splatters furious bubbles at my body's pitiful attempt to cough up the water and relieve my chest. 

They say it takes about 40 seconds to drown and though I’ve only been down here for about half that, it feels like twice that time. I’ve always wanted to go in my sleep, peacefully and without a clue. But as I stare up at the hazy moon, surrounded by a deep blue sky, stars sprinkled in between, I figure this isn’t the worst thing to see last. Relaxing into the water, I give up my struggle and take a big gulp, ready to accept my fate. Vision darkening, I look up for a final peek at the starry night in all its blurred glory, or as I’d like to call this one “the party night” and take comfort in the fact that I got to live it up one last time.

#Emmy Writes #Emmy Tries #SpookySzn #Halloween Kills #Halloween Series #Halloween #Hills and Valleys #Original Story and Characters #Horror

[rainecloud020604]

Well, I am not immune to taking every chance I can to talk about Sketch am I? Well she is entered in @original-character-championship !!! And why should you vote for them? Well first of all, yel said please :(

But other than that! He is the Guy of all time, who doesn't love a cartoon character who has beef with their creator!! :D Me and also in lore creators at that, iel is full of violence and love, willing to throw hands on sight with people she doesn't get good vibes from, French and Japanese, first language was French before iel learned English, starting with the word fuck

Ex mafia boss who just decided to dip because they weren't happy with what was going on, current vigilante who uses the knowledge she has from his gang experience to mess and interfere with other gang activity to cause problems on purpose <3333 Going through a time TM during their teen and young adult years but came out full of transgender and disabled swag, can't feel touch and is blind in one eye

He has ink powers and also can have claws when need be, as well as pull out a gun whenever they feel like it,, along with a giant mallet!!

ALSO LOOK AT THEM AS A CHILD HOW COULD YOU NOT LOVE THEM???? BABEY full of LOVE, and WARMTH, and just wants to cuddle :((

(feat @arcaneyouth's persona)

there are other cool aspects of Sketch, I mean their name is Sketch The Lines and thats cool as hell right?? and she owns a pet snake!! My genderfluid Biromantic Ace has all sorts of swag :3

Also if that isn't enough, well he has kids at home :(

Troy and Candy belong to @flowerrose14 elis, boo and magnus belong to @imfirequeen

#original character championship #tangled up~ 🎵 (sketch lines) #propaganda #Doodles the Noodle #magnus #Boo #Troy twig #Candy #Nicolas #Elis D #oooooooo you wanna vote for them so baaaaad they are my comfort oc please #rainecloud020604 draws shit

[novacorpsrecruit]

You and Me (in the center of the apocalypse) on Ao3

─── ⋆⋅chapter 3 posted!!⋅⋆ ──

“Hey.”

Eddie turned his head to the edge of the trailer’s roof. A box held up, just barely above the metal shingle.

“Can you help me?” Steve’s voice called from below. He gave the box a gentle wiggle to emphasize the assistance needed. Eddie let out a laugh.

“I guess so.” He pushed himself off the blanket laid out on the roof and half hustled over to the box. He took it from Steve’s hands, looking at the picnic spread Steve had set aside for them. Two MREs disassembled with the main dishes boiled hot, a bag of chips, a half pack of beer and Twinkies. Eddie took a step back, watching as Steve push himself up onto the roof. Eddie watched in awe as Steve’s shoulders tighten, as he literally pushed himself up, his arms straighten as he kicked his leg up over the ledge.

Maybe it was the athleticism preformed by the former King of Hawkins. Or maybe it was Eddie’s tight Black Sabbath shirt that showed off his muscles. Either way, it made something deep inside of Eddie growl, ‘MINE.’

Steve grinned as he caught Eddie’s stare. He threw Eddie a quick wink as he took the box from his hands.

“C’mon, Ed,” Steve said. “Picnic’s not gonna unpack itself.”

Eddie let out a soft laugh as he jogged over to Steve and the picnic blanket. He playfully hopped down on the blanket, instantly going for the beer. Not even 48 hours ago, Eddie was fighting a fever. 24 hours, he found the pain Steve has been hiding. And now, they’re climbing on top of the trailer roof to watch the clearing skies of the Upside Down. If they fooled themselves, the constant ash in the distance could be mistaken as stars.

“Alright,” Steve clapped his hands, rubbing them together as they were about to have a feast. “From the five star Michelin restaurant, we have diced turkey with gravy and diced beef with gravy. The chef’s personal recommendations.”

“Oh the chef?” Eddie’s eyebrows shot up. “And it paired well with Pabst?”

“He said only the best,” Steve said. “On the house. Which one do you want?”

“Beef,” Eddie said, extending his reach towards Steve, accepting the prepared MRE. “It’s been a while since I’ve had a good ribeye.”

“Yeah,” Steve let out a soft laugh. “Ribeye.”

“Is that jealousy I hear?” Eddie asked, a playful smirk across his face. “You just wish you ordered the rib-eye instead of the duck —“

“Excuse you,” Steve laughed. “This is duck a l’orange. The finest French dish on the menu.”

“Oh, my bad,” Eddie laughed, opening the package. The content’s aroma went straight to his nose. “Holy shit this actually smells good. It uh — kind of reminds me of my uncle’s Salisbury steak. He would add a can of cream of mushroom soup to the brown gravy mix and serve it over instant mash. God, I —“ Eddie let out an exhale. “I miss him.”

“I can’t wait to try it,” Steve said.

“Try what?”

“Your uncle’s Salisbury steak,” Steve said, opening his MRE. “You’ll ask him to make it for us, right?”

“Yeah,” Eddie nodded. “I think he’d like you.”

“Yeah?”

“The guy who practically nursed me back to health?” Eddie shot Steve a grin. “Yeah, he’d love you.”

“Good. If not, I was prepared to use my Harrington charm on him,” Steve wiggled his eyebrows before turning his attention on his meal. He took a hesitant bite before shooting Eddie a thumbs up. “Best duck I’ve ever had.”

Eddie laughed, not convinced. He took a bite of his diced beef and — well, it wasn’t the worst thing he ever had. But it definitely made him miss Wayne’s cooking. Wayne was a professional at dolling up meals, making cheap meals taste better and more filling. How he’d kill for some of Wayne’s flapjacks and fried eggs. “Yeah,” Eddie swallowed his food, then flashed a grin. “Cow’s still bleeding. Can’t get this anywhere else.”

There were a few moments that passed where they just ate and drank, their shoulders pressed together like it meant nothing and their entire world all at the same time.

“What about your parents?” Eddie spoke up.

“What about them?”

“Do you think they would like me?” Eddie asked. “I know I’m not everyone’s cup of tea, but you think I’d grow on them?”

“Uh — not to disappoint but I don’t think they would care,” Steve said with a shrug. “Don’t take that in a bad way —“

“Kind of hard not to,” Eddie said with a laugh. Eddie doesn’t think he could lie if Steve asked him if that hurt. Eddie’s not sure if he’s capable of lying to Steve anymore.

“I just meant — I don’t think they know I’m missing.”

“… What?”

“I don’t think they know,” Steve said. “And I don’t think they care.”

“Steve, we’ve been stuck for —“

“I know how long we’ve been stuck for Eddie,” Steve snapped. “I’ve been counting the days. They wouldn’t care.”

“Fuck your parents, man,” Eddie said. “They don’t deserve you.” Eddie’s heart ached as Steve’s words sunk in. They wouldn’t care. Eddie broke the silence, ��What’s their names?”

“What?”

“What’s their names?” Eddie repeated. “Your old man and woman. Sperm and egg donors. Their names?”

“Richard and Sharon,” Steve supplied.

Eddie hopped onto his feet, shuffling the MRE to one hand and cupped the other around his mouth as he shouted to the edge of town: “FUCK YOU RICHARD AND SHARON!”

“Eddie!”

“C’mon!” Eddie begged, reaching down and gently tugging on Steve’s arm. “You can’t tell me that you never wanted to do that!”

Steve let out a laugh, allowing himself to be pulled up and into Eddie’s side. “Eddie, this is so stupid.”

“It’s therapeutic,” Eddie said, wrapping his free arm around Steve’s waist. “C’mon. Try it!”

“FUCK YOU RICHARD HARRINGTON!” Steve screamed.

“FUCK YOU DICK!” Eddie yelled.

“YOU’RE A FUCKING BITCH, SHARON!”

“BURN IN HELL, RICKY!”

“Ricky?” Steve asked, turning to face Eddie.

“My dad,” Eddie said. “He’s a real piece of shit.”

“EAT SHIT, RICKY!”

Eddie let out a deep laugh. “Felt good, didn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Steve breathed. He brought his hand up to cup Eddie’s face, his thumb gently rubbing over the scarring on his cheek. “It really did.”

Every nerve in Eddie’s body begged him to lean forward to kiss Steve. He wanted to. He needed to.

(Read more on Ao3 mind the tags)

#steddie #steve harrington #Eddie Munson #stranger things #steddie fic #I feel like there was a baby boom of Richard’s so I headcanon Harrington Munson and Buckley are all Richard’s #just like every man around 40-50 I meet at work’s name is Shawn/sean #//myfic

[astroidfangirl]

Meet the Eras

I realize that if I'm making a page of Incorrect quotes about Taylor Swift's albums, I probably should give you guys an idea about how I personally characterize them (This isn't to be taken seriously, and everything I upload to this page is just for fun) That being said let's get into it.

DEBUT- A naive high schooler Says things like "Big mood" or "Fight me" (She would not win in a fight). She doesn't wear makeup or care about her appearance too much. She is a shy bookworm with 2 friends. She also gives terrific hugs. She is the younger sister of speak now because Picture to burn (homophobic version) goes with Better than Revenge (Mysoginistic version) like Peanut Butter goes with Jelly.

FEARLESS- I made her besties with DEBUT because Taylor was also in high school when she wrote this album. However, she is more outgoing and confident than Debut is. She is close to her mother and writes shitty poetry during her free time. She goes to bed at 8:00 PM and always zones out in class. She is the younger sister of Reputation because she was unhinged as heck during this era (The monologue song and the chair throw are everything)

From this point, I imagine everyone in college rather than high school.

SPEAK NOW: Petty and dramatic (But we love her for it). She is pretty irresponsible (Despite claiming otherwise) and can hold a grudge. She has been beefing with Folklore since High School because her boyfriend (at the time) cheated on her with Folklore (Hence the whole love triangle and better than revenge). She enjoys eating sweets and likes cold weather. She is secretly a hopeless romantic and has her entire damn wedding planned.

RED: Roommates with Speak Now. She is currently going through a breakup and is kind of depressed about it. She is a climate protester and is being tormented by the DuoLingo Owl to learn French. She gets drunk at parties and then cries in the bathroom. (And overshares to anyone who will listen to her)

1989: She is the popular sorority girl. She enjoys traveling and partying with friends. She is that one girl who gets good grades in her classes without trying. She says things like- "I was born in the wrong generation," despite always being on her phone. She plans to move to New York City after she graduates.

REPUTATION: Literally the best person you will ever meet. She will stand up for anyone, even if they are a total stranger. If you tell her a secret, she will never tell another soul. She is dating LOVER, and everyone on campus ships them. She has a pet snake. (You guys can give me name suggestions). She is the biggest softie ever.

LOVER: Is lowkey the mom friend of the group. She bakes cookies for everyone during their weekly board game nights. She is definitely a Disney adult. She is a huge feminist and is very involved in politics. She sometimes lashes out at Reputation for small things but always apologizes. She is also an Astrology girl.

FOLKLORE: The whole love triangle in the Album played out with Speak Now as Betty and her as Augustine. She is twins with Evermore, and although she is older by 13 minutes (See what I did there), she journals about her feelings, and her sleep schedule is non-existent.

EVERMORE: Twins with Folklore and Besties with Red. She is an Art Major who loves painting. She watches so much true crime that she probably could get away with murder. She lowkey has commitment issues because her dad was a huge prick (In reference to the song Seven in Folklore's album)

Midnights: Besties with Reputation and is definitely a stoner, She defiantly believes in Karma. Tons of boys are in love with her but she doesn't really care. She is kind of an emo who can scheme people into doing whatever the hell she wants. She studied abroad in Paris for a semester and claims that it changed her life.

#taylor swift eras #1989 taylor's version #midnights era #reputation era #red era #fearless era #folklore era #taylor swift debut #evermore era #speak now era #lover taylor swift

[bethanyactually]

Well seeing as you seem to always have impeccable taste and suggestions whilst also introducing me to things I've literally never heard of, would you like to give me a little rundown on The Bear? I've never heard of it but I'm intrigued.

It's about a guy, Carmen Berzatto, who is a world-class chef who moves home to Chicago to run his family's sandwich shop, The Beef, after his brother Mikey left it to him in his will when he died by suicide. The restaurant is not in great shape, and the staff are varying degrees of indifferent to hostile towards him and his efforts to get the shop in better shape.

Carmen himself is not in great shape, either, not really dealing with the death of his brother and all tied up in knots from years of working for abusive, abrasive chefs in extremely high-pressure kitchens. He hires another chef to work at The Beef who's his equal in skill and knowledge if not experience, Sydney, who's also a Chicago local. Sydney has had not-great experiences working in prestigious restaurants and wants to work in a different kind of place that's less abusive and competitive, more cooperative and supportive.

Carmy asks Sydney to help him remake The Beef's kitchen into one more along the lines of a traditional French kitchen. She doesn't think that kind of hierarchical structure is a great idea, but she admires Carmy's accomplishments and skills and agrees against her better judgment. She struggles to earn the respect of the rest of the staff while also staggering under the weight of the responsibilities heaped (perhaps unfairly) on her.

Carmen's cousin Richie, a foulmouthed asshole who was his big brother's best friend, has worked at The Beef forever, and he's not gonna make anything easier, insisting that the way they did things when Mikey was alive worked just fine. There's a whole restaurant staff who are fantastic (some have bigger roles than others, but they're all individuals and contribute to the story), and Carmen's sister who worries incessantly about him even as she's pissed off at him, and Carmen's affectionate but no-bullshit uncle who is maybe in the mob?? who Mikey borrowed hundreds of thousands of dollars from before he died, and and of course Carmen is now on the hook for that loan.

That all makes it sound much more sprawling than it is, when it's actually a fairly focused show about one workplace that just has a lot of stuff happening at the edges of the story. It's a chaotic, intense, stressful, amazing show about people who have dreams and do a thing they love and want to just get a little better every day and are doing their best while constantly also dealing with the shit that life throws at you. I had to watch it one episode at a time with a break of a day or two between episodes to process it, and I can't stop thinking about how GOOD the series was and I'm probably gonna rewatch it soon.

As my friend @lovebeyondmeasure said, "[The Bear is] not trying to be shocking or prestige or expensive. It's trying to tell a complex, layered story with nuance and care for its characters."

#the bear #please watch it it’s so good #birdsagainsthumanity

[thelaundrybitch]

Little Blue Hearts Update - Chapter 28

Happy Tuesday Turtle Doves!

Whew! It has been one hell of a ride so far 😅

I'd like to take this opportunity to thank all of you who read and enjoy all my work, especially Little Blue Hearts. It's closer to my heart than you know💕

With that being said, this chapter brings us full circle and starting with the next chapter, we will be delving into some interestingly weird and dark shit. Hold tight. 😬

Soon, you will be meeting some new characters and villains *gasp*

BUT DON'T WORRY! There will still be lots of fluff, romance, and adult time 👀

PLEASE NOTE: concerning this chapter - there are potential triggers. Sexual assault is mentioned but it does not go any further than a mention.

18+ content - for mature audiences only!

Reblogs only, please!

Little Blue Hearts cover art by the lovely @leosgirl82

Redeemed... Kinda

~Michelangelo~

FOUR HOURS.

Leo's had us doing guided meditation with Sensei for FOUR FREAKIN HOURS.

With sandalwood burning the whole time. NOT MY FAVORITE THING.

You know, the point of this guided meditation was to calm everyone's nerves and help rid unwanted energy from the night's events, but I'm fairly certain it's having the OPPOSITE effect on me.

"Michelangelo," Master Splinter speaks my name softly, pulling me from my internal bitchfest.

"Yes, Sensei?" I ask, opening my eyes.

"Would it be rude of me to ask you to make a meal for everyone while I finish up the last hour with your brothers?" He asks with a knowing smile.

"Not at all, Sensei. Any requests?" I ask him.

"Something big and delicious," he whispers to me, eyes wide in emphasis.

I get up and bow to him, with a big appreciative smile, before heading to the kitchen.

About an hour and a half later, I have the entire island full of different breakfasty foods.

Freshly cut fruit salad with a yogurt dip, cinnamon french toast, pancakes, eggs- scrambled, fried, and deviled, corn beef hash, bacon, sausage, bread hot out of the maker, some breakfast sushi, chicken adobo, jasmine rice, and my specialty breakfast vegetable stir-fry. The condiments are spread out on the island as well.

Plates are set up at the breakfast table that I've added the leaf to, so it's big enough to accommodate everyone.

Coffee for Donnie, Mocha Latte for Raph, green tea for Leo, Oolong tea for Dad, and a glass of milk for me.

-I don't like how caffeine makes me feel, hence the milk-

Everyone comes filing in looking more exhausted now, than they were before they went into the dojo for meditation.

I give Leo a questioning look, and he mouths "Later" to me.

Dad is full of praise and gratitude for the amazing meal I've prepared. Honestly, it feels a little too much, but I'll take the praise over getting bitched at for beating my girlfriend's attacker.

While we're eating, Ashley texts me that she found my radio under her futon and will bring it to the lair later.

"Hey guys, Ash says she and Liv will be headed here around 4:30 this afternoon - after they take a nap. She says they're gonna have a bite to eat at that little cafe down the street from her apartment before they come, though. She doesn't want Liv getting all hangry when she's here," I tell them with a chuckle.

"Good," says Sensei. "You will all go to sleep and relax until it is time for the girls to join us. Michelangelo, I would like you to order some pizza for dinner tonight, please," he instructs me.

"Joe's it is!" I exclaim. "I'll call after breakfast is cleaned up, to put in the order. I'll pay over the phone and set up for contactless delivery at Ashley's after the ladies leave the apartment," I tell him.

"Excellent, Michelangelo. Thank you. Now go get some rest. All of you," he demands.

Everyone leaves the kitchen aside from me and Leo, who I can tell needs to talk.

"What happened after I left the dojo?" I ask him as he helps me put everything in containers to be refrigerated.

"We were put in strengthening poses for reprimanding you this morning," he says solemnly.

"Wait, what?" I ask, looking at him in confusion.

Leo sighs, "You know how Dad likes to watch Donnie's monitors when he's worried? You know, his 'gut feeling' thing?" He asks.

"Yea, ok," I say.

"Well, he watched us all night. He saw the whole thing with Ashley's attacker…" says Leo, looking at me, my eyes going wide.

"Oh, no…" I whisper.

"He was both amazed and proud of your actions," Leo says, looking a bit shocked.

"He told us it was a completely normal reaction to have. First, coming across someone who almost killed you while you were trying to save a woman being raped. And second, finding said rapist who was trying to finish what he started, with your girlfriend, a year later - by sneaking into her apartment during sleeping hours. With a knife," he finishes. "Jesus, Mikey, I didn't even know he had a knife," he whispers, fear flashing across his face.

I nod. "So was he proud that I took the guy out? I can't imagine he was proud that I almost choked him to death," I say, feeling a bit guilty.

"He was proud that you put him down. You did the right thing, Mike. You caught the guy, then kept your emotions in check," says Leo. "Actually, I was really proud of you too. AM! I am really proud of you!" He corrects himself.

I give him a cautious smile, "Thanks," I say, feeling a bit better about the whole situation now.

"Alright. Time for sleep. I hope," Leo says, rolling his eyes as he puts the last of the leftovers in the fridge.

"Still geekin’ out?" I ask him with a smile.

"Yes. I don't even know how to pull myself together anymore," he sighs. "But I'm out. Before I get in trouble with Dad. Again," he says, flashing me big eyes, as he turns and leaves the kitchen.

I finish putting away the clean dishes and head to my bedroom, where I call and place an order for four pizzas from Joe's to be delivered to Ashley's at 4:30 this afternoon. Then I crawl into bed for some much-needed sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*Bang bang bang*

"Mikey! It's four o'clock! Get ya ass up!"

"Ugh…"

*Bang bang bang*

"YEA, YEA! I'M UP!" I yell to Raph, who is beating the shit out of my door.

I lay in bed for a few more minutes until I hear the signature Leo knock, followed by the click of my door opening up.

"Did you sleep, Prince Charming?" I ask him, smiling, with my eyes still closed.

He chuckles, "What's with you guys calling me Prince Charming, anyway?" He asks.

I sit up on the edge of my bed, facing toward where he's standing.

"Bruh… you could charm the spots off a leopard, for crying out loud!" I tell him. "Seriously? You're like the world's biggest flirt, and NO ONE CARES because you're so good at it. You don't discriminate either! Men, women, relatives, animals… I mean, for real!" I exaggerate.

He chuckles, leaning up against the dresser by the door. "I think that's a little much. And I'm not a flirt. Well, not purposely, anyway," he says, furrowing his brow ridge. "Gentleman, yes. And everyone should be treated with respect," he says.

"May God have mercy on any person you purposely flirt with. We might end up needing to call the coroner," I say, smirking and winking at him.

"Oh, come on. Now you're really blowing smoke up my skirt," he says, picking up one of Ashley's hair-ties off the dresser and sling-shotting it at me.

I catch it before it hits me in the face and stand up to stretch. "Alright, Prince Charming, let's go figure out who's getting dinner," I say, still teasing him.

"Oh, Dad says you, me, and Donnie are to go over to Ashley's to get dinner," he says. "He wants Raph to help him with a bath before Liv gets here."

"Poor Raph," I whisper, wide-eyed and horrified, as we walk to the lab to get Donnie.

After fighting with Donnie, and needing to give him the ultimatum to either come with us or help bathe Dad, we're all off to Ashley's. 

Ashley texts me halfway there to let us know they're already at the cafe enjoying their late lunch - which would've perfectly lined up for us to get back to the lair before them, but the friggin pizza guy was like 15 minutes late! I had to call Raph to go get the girls in the SUV, and boy was Donnie unhappy about that.

We're on our way back to the lair, and Leo is losing his mind. He's doing an excellent job of looking composed, but I can feel the anxious energy rolling off him in waves.

"Chill, dude," I whisper, and he just gives me a pleading look.

Shit.

I can hear Ashley's voice up ahead as we're getting closer to the lair, and Leo looks like he's ready to either pass out from anxiety, or run away screaming and crying in the opposite direction.

Double shits.

Donnie is far enough behind us, fiddling with his PDA, where I take a chance to whisper to Leo.

"Everything is gonna be fine. Perfect, even," I say, trying to convince my poor older brother.

"Mikey, I can't do this. What if she hates me?" He says, slowly unraveling.

"She won't," I say confidently.

"How do you know?" He questions me.

"Oh good lord in heaven, I can't believe I'm doing this," I breathe out quickly, making a cross over the front of my body.

"Doing what?" Asks Leo.

"Look,'' I say, lowering my whispering voice even lower, "She likes you."

"Nice try, Mike. That doesn't work anymore. We aren't kids, you know," he says, looking annoyed.

"Leo. She knows who we are - don't ask how. Just believe me. And she likes you. Like LIKES you, man," I say softly.

"What?" 

Time has stopped for Leo.

I'm fairly certain I just saw fireworks erupt over his head, the same time while hearing my sex life being flushed down the toilet. 

But. 

I can't let him meet her in the state he's in. I love my brother too much to see him suffering when I know I can help.

"I'll swear on anything you want. Ashley told me. But if you tell her or anyone else that I told you, I may lose my manhood," I mumble. "I've probably just kissed my sex life goodbye too, to be honest," I mutter.

We've made it to the lair, and I can see Ashley has Liv by the hands, so Liv's back is to us.

I look at Leo, and everything about his demeanor and energy has changed. 

He's a new man.

I turn back to my girlfriend who's smiling at us from where she's holding Liv.

"Hey, Baby!" I say to her with the biggest smile I have in my *I'm in so much shit* arsenal.

Thankfully she doesn't pick up on it.

"Hey, hun. Just. Can you guys stay there for one minute? I want to introduce you to my cousin." She says.

Leo decides he's gonna hang back a bit in the shadows, and Donnie goes right in.

"Oh, hey, Ash!" 

"Is everything alright?" Asks Leo when he sees how Ashley is holding Liv, Ashley's face visibly concerned

"Yeah. Actually, I think everything is." She slowly lets go of her cousin's hands, letting them drop down to her sides. 

"Liv, I'd like you to meet my friends..."

Little Blue Hearts Master list HERE

@leosgirl82 @turtle-babe83 @drowninghelll @chicchanmooshy @roxosupreme @mysticboombox @nittleboo @post-apocalyptic-daydream @xanadu-702 @xanadu702 @pheradream15 @mistyroselove @ashleighclark98 @jurikyu-blog @sewerninno @tmntspidergirl @raphielover @zombiesnips-blog @raphslovemuffin80 @brightlotusmoon @superneko-chan

*If you aren’t on this list, please let me know if you want me to tag you in my other work or if you prefer me to not tag you 😘

#little blue hearts #thelaundrybitch #tmnt fanfiction #tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt bayverse #tmnt leo #tmnt leonardo #bayverse leo #bayverse leonardo #tmnt raph #tmnt raphael #bayverse raph #bayverse raphael #tmnt donnie #tmnt donatello #bayverse donnie #bayverse donatello #tmnt mikey #tmnt michelangelo #bayverse mikey #bayverse michelangelo #tmnt aged up

[self-loathing-angel-of-thursday2]

Beautiful Spouse’s Rewatch Thoughts SPN 06x15 The French Mistake

“Are we just staring at a side of beef or what?” “I like the writing so far. It’s shaping up well” “Cassie. Raphie” “What the fuck” “Slap him on the ass” “What the fuck” “6 seasons. You’re allowed to make fun of yourself” “laughing then said holy shit’ “Oh my god” “What’s with all the pictures?” “I’m a painted whore” “I’ve only ever seen chicks put pictures of themselves around their vanities” “laughed” “laughed” “Does Misha show up all of a sudden?” “Is that actually Castiel?” “Or is he just acting? I can’t tell.” “Holy shit” “Wanna run lines? Maybe do a line” “Jesus fkn Christ” “Is that a real thing? MIshamigos?” “What kind of nerd comes up with that?” 

Laughing the whole time

“It has sparkles on the outside” “That’s kinda weird right?” “holy shit” “I aint no quitter” “soul phone” “That’s pretty good. I hadn’t heard that one before” “That’s fkn lame” “Kids toy. Not even a prop” “That’s really hard on your glass actually, but I suppose he doesn’t care since it’s the fake one” “do some stuff” “that’s gross” “Gross. You’re gross” “Is this a set or actually his house?” “alpaca noises” laughed

“Maybe you should sell me some supplements” “Hey look it’s not an apple” “Is that from Walker?” “When does Scrooge show up with Christmas ghosts?” “Would she keep up on the show that closely?” I’d watch your show

“Oh cool” “Misha’s gotta be making faces at Jensen right now” “Rule #1 of acting I guess” “Have you ever watched Formula 1?” laughing at Misha

“It’s drugs” “What’s so evil about this hotel room? Oh it’s a set.” “Well..they’ve got angels I guess” “All of a sudden she’s like. I don’t even know what to say” “She got horny for that” “Has anyone ever showed up to a convention wearing this outfit?” “I’m not enough of a Twink to pull that off” Yeah he’s not in his dilf era yet laughed

Laughed

“And that fan made another show about it” pointing to Jensen

“I need Kyle to pick up some drag droppings” “That’s unfortunate” “That would suck” “oh yeah Canada. I forgot” “That was like $5” “Might not want to give a guy a gun who says something like that” “I’m the weapons keeper of heaven. I want to buy a gun” “To be fair, it’s not America so it’s harder to buy a gun” “Is it harder to buy a gun in Canada? Did they break character with that?” “They really had fun with this” “Somebody didn’t appreciate Kripke leaving the show” “I thought he was going to piss on Kripke” “Oh it freeze-framed” 🎶dude looks like a lady🎶

“I almost couldn’t take Misha seriously there” “That was pretty badass though. Let’s rewatch it” laughed “Way to hide it” “He was in on the plan about another world where Misha was going to use his image? And he was cool with that?” “Slapping wood” “they should have freeze framed again”

#beautifulspouserewatchesspn #supernatural #supernatural rewatch #supernatural s6

[tkc-info]

Carpe Diem

Day 7 - night

@wagner-fell @chibi-tsukiko @littleturtle95

2018

“And what do you usually do for Departure Night?” Barbara asked at breakfast.

Caleb looked up from his cereal bowl, but never stopped eating, to meet her eyes. Urick’s mother was a chubby, short Black woman in her fifties. She worked in a nursery home in Aboveground Winchester, so she usually wore aquamarine scrubs exclusively. However today she’d come down for breakfast dressed in 1950s casual clothes, her hair —which she wore in locks— up in a messy bun.

“I don’t celebrate Departure Night,” Caleb said. He probably should’ve used the plural form instead of referring only to himself, but remembering he’d been part of a family unit hurt too much.

Barbara tsked in disapproval. Caleb did his best not to flinch at the sound. “Departure Night is a celebration for all of The Kinship, of course,” she said as she poured honey onto a tower of pancakes “Every Saz can have fun during it, but we doppelgängers live for Departure Night. You have to do something special today.”

Caleb shrugged. “Never really saw the point of it.”

Back when everything was okay, his family just watched the Khioax setting fire to the Vessel, and the news that followed it for a while before turning off the TV. Then they would go play some music like every other, unremarkable night.

“Nonsense,” Barbara set the honey aside and joined Caleb at the kitchen counter “You’re spending tonight with me. We’re going to Las Vegas.”

“Pardon?”

“Didn’t you hear me? Kid, you need to clean your ears thoroughly if you didn’t, because I was very clear.”

Caleb felt his face go red —from indignation or embarrassment, he didn’t know. “My ears are clean.”

Barbara hummed in a weird way. “Whatever you say,” she turned her face to the door “I hope these kids come down soon, I need to get some stuff from Target and the automaton has run out of battery.”

“You could be the one going.”

“If you come with me.”

Caleb didn’t say anything else, and Barbara laughed.

Truthfully, he, too, hoped someone would walk into the kitchen, especially if that someone was Urick. Barbara never failed to make Caleb uncomfortable; she always invited him to go on walks with him, prepared delicious food so that ‘the kid could eat some much-needed spices’, or Irish or French dishes because ‘now that the kid is with us, we have to adapt our diet a little bit’, she always offered to buy him clothes he didn’t need for no reason other than they would look good on him. Caleb wasn’t used to this attentiveness, his parents had never been there much. He felt more at ease with Urick, who was calmer and slightly more withdrawn into himself.

“I’m thinking of cooking one of my inventions for dinner,” Barbara mused “And I will need beef for it. Airele,” her oldest child after Urick “Is friends with this guy from that one expensive butchers, so she can get a discount. Then I need—”

Barbara began listing every ingredient she would need for tonight. To Caleb’s mild horror, she loved cooking made-up dishes that somehow tried to mesh a myriad of cuisines. Sometimes, the outcome was delicious; others, Caleb would rather eat in his former school’s cafeteria. Tonight’s dinner probably fell into the former category, but still.

“We’ll watch the Khioax while we have dinner, and then you and I will take a portal to Las Vegas.”

Caleb chocked on his cereal. “I really have to go?”

“Of course,” Barbara said, eating her pancakes without a care of the panic Caleb was going through “You’re a doppelgänger. Doppelgängers don’t stay Departure Night holed up in their houses, that’s for the rest of the Saz. Don’t worry, kid, you’ll love my friends, and Las Vegas consumed in fire is always a gorgeous sight.”

Caleb would rather not see Las Vegas on fire. Not because he was afraid —it wasn’t fire that had taken his parents’s lives— but rather because everyone would be partying and, for one, he didn’t want to party with a bunch of middle-aged women. He didn’t even like partying, at all.

He was about to protest when Urick walked into the kitchen, followed by his other three siblings.

“About time you four showed up,” Barbara greeted, with a big smile she directed not at them, but at Caleb. The message behind it was painfully clear: he would spend Departure Night with her, and there wouldn’t be any further discussion about it.

For the first time in the fourteen years he’d been alive, Caleb wished he were something other than a doppelgänger. A wraith, a conductor like Urick, a puppeteer… if he were anything but a doppelgänger, he wouldn’t have to ride a tiny taxi with six very loud, very glittery, middle-aged women who screamed ‘what happens in Las Vegas stays in Las Vegas’ like a drunken mantra.

Earlier that night, Barbara had changed into a neon green Italian Renaissance dress with a sweeping décolletage and glitter everywhere, and buried her hair under a blond wig that made her forehead four times bigger. The dress code she and her friends were following, Barbara had explained to a horror-struck Caleb, was ‘modern rainbow’.

The rest of her friends were clad in similarly-ridiculous attires: Aztec nobility’s clothing, only hot pink and glittery; a bright, glittery, yellow hanfu from the Ming dynasty; glittery peasant clothes from the Holy Roman Empire the colour of fresh blood; the garments of an Ethiopian queen in the 17th century soaked in neon orange and glitter. One of them had interpreted ‘modern’ to mean ‘futuristic’. She had showed up wearing an azure, glittery thong and skimpy bra paired up with the boots Ariana Grande had worn in Break Free, but with more glitter.

It was all a bit too much. Caleb couldn’t take his eyes off Stripper Lady. He was afraid she’d move too fast and her breasts would slip out, or—

Thankfully, the taxi halted to a stop before Caleb could finish that thought.

“Let’s go girls!” Hanfu-lady screeched, kicking the passenger door open and stumbling outside.

“What happens in Las Vegas stays in Las Vegas!” Ethiopian-queen shouted.

The rest of the women echoed some variation of ‘yes’. To Caleb’s mortification, Barbara slurred, “Slay queen!”

Once Caleb, the last on the vehicle, managed to get out, the taxi honked loudly and sped away so fast it left skid marks on the pavement.

“Kid, come here,” Barbara wobbled to Caleb’s side and hooked an arm around him.

“Did you really have water at dinner or vodka?”

“Vodka.”

“By Roxia.”

“Doesn’t matter,” Barbara’s hands settled on his shoulders “Listen here, kid, you’re going to watch this whole place being set on fire with us, but I advise you to flee afterwards. Go to another party, find yourself someone to dance with or just dance alone, climb the fake Eiffel Tower. Anything but being with us unless you want to witness Lizzie,” she nodded towards Stripper Lady “Trying to lure some poor man into being her sixth husband.”

Stripper Lady was applying glitter around her pale collar bone and cleavage. The realisation of why she was dressed like that made Caleb want to puke.

“Can’t I leave now?” he asked Barbara.

“No,” she turned to Bloody Peasant “Kungundt, lead the way.”

“Aye!”

And so Caleb was ushered through the streets of Mirror Las Vegas to a large plaza. Departure Night proper had yet to start —not a lick of fire was to be seen anywhere— but it would soon. The plaza, a gigantic space with 19th-century pavement painted as gold and towering buildings fashioned after Rococo palaces, was crowded with doppelgängers dressed in antithetical attires. Caleb saw both people who resembled Barbara and her friends, as well as people in comfortable tracksuits. However, all of them were facing a screen propped up against the facade of the biggest building.

The screen lit up seconds after they arrived.

“Just in time,” Pink Aztec breathed.

A feminine figure came into view. A leather cape shadowed her face; coats and gloves hid everything about her but for her mouth. Yrr Skuldottir, Commander-in-chief of the Archaic Army.

She was standing behind an armchair in a drawing room decorated lavishly in some South Asian style Caleb couldn’t quite name; her arms crossed and her legs spread out into a defensive stance. A door creaked open somewhere off camera, and a man and a woman approached the Commander-in-chief. The man was tall, extremely handsome, and red headed. Judging by her wrinkled, brown face and silver-coloured hair, she must’ve been in her nineties.

Caleb was new to this whole celebrating-Departure-Night-as-a-doppelgänger thing, but he was accustomed to the Khioax’s speech. Every Saz was. Lalima Osmani would say some pretty words about burning the past year —bidding thus a farewell to everything good and bad— and building the new year with the ashes, in a pre-recorded clip. Then, the video would switch to a life recording of the Khioax and the Commander-in-chief (unfortunately, without Levi Greerson) in an Icelandic beach.

“Five minutes, girls,” Barbara whispered, dark eyes trained on the screen. What with how quiet everyone was, it probably felt wrong to speak any louder.

The Khioax was walking barefoot on black sand to the shore, where the Commander-in-chief waited for her, torch in hand. The plaza reverberated with the sounds of the fire dancing besides her. An ancient warship made of wood, the Vessel, floated in the water at her back.

According to Saz folklore, the Vessel was the last home of the souls of the deceased, the Charon which would guide them to the spiritual afterlife while their mortal remains flourished as trees in some faraway cemetery. For that, the Vessel’s every inch was adorned with carvings of names. Though Caleb couldn’t read any of them, he wondered whether his parents’s were there. Gabrielle and Frank Verninac.

The Commander-in-chief bestowed the torch upon the Khioax, who slowly made her way into the water. It must’ve been freezing, but she let out no signs of discomfort.

The Khioax stopped a few steps away from the Vessel; if she reached with her hand, she’d be able to touch the tip of the bowsprit. She cleared her throat, and then spoke powerfully. “Let us say our goodbyes, and our greetings to what is to come. The fire will guide you, as it will guide me in the days to come. And the fire will heal us, as it has healed you in the days gone by.”

Murmurs rose up around Caleb. People were reciting the names —some sombrely, others almost like an afterthought— of those they’d lost along the past months. Caleb tried to say his parents’s names, but chocked on the words, his throat constricted around the vowels. Gabrielle Verninac. Frank Verninac, né O’Moran.

Mum.

Dad.

Dead all because of Caleb’s shortcomings.

Suddenly it was harder to breathe. He didn’t need to breathe when it was his animus what he was using, but Caleb didn’t remember that. His memory took him back to That Day, and, logically, he knew it had all passed, but still. He felt dirty. He couldn’t stop thinking about his parents. Did the people around him see how much of a monster he was? The man next to him, he was side-eyeing Caleb, judging him for not being able to say his parents’s names. Gabrielle and Frank —Caleb knew them, but.

He elbowed his way out of the throng of people, to the middle of a street empty but for a man behind an alcohol stall.

“Want booze?” the man slurred. He was drunk “It’s free.”

Caleb was too overwhelmed by everything to question why he was being offered alcohol. For one, animi couldn’t get drunk (one’s body had to get drunk first for inebriation to pass on to the animex), and he was a minor. None of that sank in at the time, though. Then, he only knew that he needed something that would cushion his pain, and since he didn’t have his headphones with him, alcohol might just as well be the next best thing. And if it wasn’t, it at least was the easiest to acquire.

He stretched out his left arm, palm spread open, to let the vendor know he accepted his offer. The events that happened next were all blurry: he got drunk instantly (placebo effect strengthened by the fact that it was his first time consuming), people pushed him away, somewhere with even more people, Las Vegas started burning and a group of girls shouted the lyrics to a song in Korean, he was laying on the pavement, running to a wall, spinning like a madman, but it was okay because everyone was equally as crazy as him.

He didn’t quite forget about his parents, rather their deaths became funny. Caleb had killed them, and somehow that made him laugh. Maniacally, but it was laughter nevertheless. The flames around him made him feel good. It was like he was burning in hell, like so many people, including himself, thought he would for various reasons. Religious, moral.

Hilarious.

Mirror Las Vegas was the ideal hell. Arching towers of gold, gilded streets, a city as wonderful and vane as the fattest diamond in the devil’s crown. Caleb felt like he had stepped into the physical definition of carpe diem: enjoy the moment, bask in it and its superficiality because your life is worth nothing, your future forever damned, so enjoy the present and do crazy things and laugh about Gabrielle and Frank Verninac being dead.

Suddenly, an upbeat melody began playing from who knew where, and his world’s definition intensified. Now this was an effective method to drown out his sorrow. Music. Just music. Magic.

“What’s your name?” a boy asked him.

They’d been dancing together, Caleb realised, really close together, though the alcohol and music and everything had made him oblivious to it. The boy was handsome, not that the flames made it possible to discern anything other than fleeting sharp angles and elongated shadows. His arm was around Caleb’s waist, pulling him closer.

“Tobias,” Caleb said; miraculously, he sounded sober.

“Really? Me, too. People call me Toby,” the boy, Toby, shouted over the music.

Caleb laughed. What were the chances of lying about your name to a stranger who shared your fake name?

“So,” Toby shouted “What are you studying?”

Confused, Caleb looked around. They were surrounded by people of collage age. Toby must’ve mistaken him for one; the flames created that optic illusion, he supposed.

Just because he found it funny, Caleb decided to continue his little mischief. “General Saz education,” it was what Urick had studied. Something about helping kids in human schools learn to control their insignia, The Kinship’s history, and stuff like that.

“That sounds so cool,” Toby shouted; he was always shouting “Do you want to be a teacher?”

Caleb nodded, and Toby shouted some other question. He might have been hot, but by Roxia could he be annoying. Caleb wanted to listen to the music and he wasn’t letting him. So, to get Toby to shut up, he kissed him square on the mouth.

He didn’t register that that was his first kiss. He only noticed the adrenaline that sped straight through his veins when Toby kissed him back, and then moved his body against Caleb’s to the rhythm of the reggae song. Now this was heaven. Carpe diem. Who was Caleb if not a living moment of lips on lips, clothed skin against clothed skin, ear-splitting symphonies, licking flames, a void where thoughts and memories were barred from existing.

Then and there, Caleb knew: this was a drug, the only thing that would keep the pain at bay.

Who were Gabrielle and Frank Verninac?

#oc-tober 2022 #oc tober 2022 #oc tober

[onisiondrama]

"Thank You For Giving My Life Meaning" Feb 13, 2023, Onision (summary)

Says when he started YouTube he was in the Air Force. He thought YouTube was the most awesome thing, it used to be a cool small community. His song "I'm So Gamer" was featured on the front page. He says it got 770,000 views, but mostly not rated well, like 2.5 stars. That got him 1,000 subscribers.

He beefed with The Amazing Ashiest over vegetarianism. He told his audience to eat meat every time Greg made a video talking about vegetarianism, so Greg made 8 back to back videos about vegetarianism to make people sick of eating meat. He says it backfired for The Amazing Ashiest. He says it was a cool experience and they eventually met and shook hands.

There were cool people on YouTube back then like Shane Dawson. Says there was a YouTuber (can't catch the name) back then who he didn't like because he would put random celebrities in his thumbnails. Says he's (Greg) more of a butts and cleavage in the thumbnail, then react to it.

YouTube had a lot of free speech back then, like iDubbz saying the n word with the hard r. Greg would say "nidder" then bleep it out to sound like the word. It was a joke and he was making fun on racist people, but people thought it was proof he was racist. That's why he would do it in a southern accent. People got the joke back then, but now they don't.

[Shiloh candy corn video, I've typed this story so many times I'm not doing it again.] His point is everyone got the joke then, but doesn't get it now.

Says people got the joke when the director of Guardians of the Galaxy made a joke about liking little boys. Now people say he's a monster. The cast stood up for him and said it was a joke. He says people like PewDiePie and Shane Dawson tweeted inappropriate jokes like that.

Says our current culture is the scariest thing ever because they try to hurt you for jokes. People lost their sense of humor.

Making content was fun back then. People looked at the full picture and facts and not things taken out of context. Over time it became, "let's cancel Tobuscus and not hear his side of the story." Says you guys went crazy and Tobuscus didn't do anything. Like Johnny Depp. You guys made Jenna Marbles cry for a misunderstanding.

Says recently he's been able to tap into optimism that comes and goes. Some days he's bitter, but some days he's ok.

Says he saw a French movie in a theater about a man who went to a concentration camp with his son. The father realized the happiness of his son was the most important thing ever, so he explains things to his son in a way that won't hurt him. He distracts his son from a pile of dead bodies. [Greg is crying now] Says the father was trying to make the best of a terrible situation for his son and he can relate to that. Says the love a father has for his son is overwhelming and it's important to value the health and mental health of your kids. Says it's one of the most beautiful aspect of human beings, being in a concentration camp and still doing everything you can to keep hope alive.

Says if you can make your life better, even if you lose money and can't follow your dreams- his dream since he was 15 was to be creative.

He was making videos trying to help people like don't self harm, don't kill yourself, this is how you deal with depression. He made thousands of videos for a decade of his life. He wanted to help people, but he said so many things he regrets. He did things that were popular and demanded of him, like taking about furries. He didn't care about furries, but whenever he made videos about them they got clicks and likes. His DDLG videos, he thought it was gross, but they got views. Those videos weren't his interest. He loved making comedy videos and seeing people encourage him in the comments, around 2009-2012. But things have changed.

He doesn't want to talk about the things people say about him on Twitter, YouTube, and national television. He says it's crazy, he was just a random guy in the military making videos and it blew up to him getting 2 billion views before the adpocalypse. He worked every day and neglected his life, threw his life away. He wasn't spending as much time with friends and family as he should have.

He was loved by a lot of people, but things turned and now everyone hates him. When you piss people off, they piss back. He prided himself as being the most honest YouTuber. He says he's pretty sure he always said "one of" the most honest because how could he be the "most" honest? He passed a polygraph and he had yankee white or just under yankee white security clearance, so the US government trusted him. He is certified in every way with his honesty. He was discharged under honorable conditions, originally discharged honorably, but it was downgraded he thinks because he served 3.5 years instead of 4.

He values blunt honesty, but it's not compatible with the world these days. It makes things harder for his family and they are the most important thing in the world. Says he lays with his kid every night and they watch SpongeBob together. Sometimes he's playing games or on twitter, and he's thinking this is the only thing that matters. This wonderful human being and the people in his life. Being on social media directly punishes the people he cares about. Now they have to deal with people walking up to him in public and saying things to him. He says lately people who have come up to him have been awesome.

He says one time he was with his family and a girl came up to him and asked if he was Onision. Later she went on Twitter and said she was terrified because he was ordering a burrito bowl. He asks why she would walk up and introduce herself to him when he's with his family? Someone at Lowes took a picture of- he cuts off and says they violated his family's privacy.

He's not sure why he didn't come to this conclusion sooner. Says the woman who played Eleven was bullied off social media when she was a kid.

You could be famous and make millions, but the consequences outweigh the joys of having a private life.

Says he's leaving social media. He's said it before, but his reason was never this good. If you're paying him a subscription, he's still going to do that. Everything he doesn't get paid for, he can't do anymore.

He tried joining the military again, but they rejected him because he doesn't want to kill people. He says he could have a desk job or clean the septic tanks, but they said no. He has to consider other options.

He says a lot of men love him on OF. He says he's a top, but they want to do things to him. Appreciates the gay men who support him.

Ends the video with a boob squeeze and the banana song video.