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#[ I. Am So normal ab this family
ace-with--a-mace · 6 months
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the truth is i actually get so insanely jealous
#not even ab christmas gifts and stuff its likr#idk obvi its christmas ppl will post their hauls but its like damn? more than 3 items person??#every year i get a pair of pjs and something practical. not that im complaining because its shit i use but#we dont make gift lists. we arent asked and arent allowed to want stuff so idk how to ask for it. then ppl ik have 30 plus items of junk an#i donr care ab presents because im a hoarder who doesnt use my shit but they have families who know of their interests#who talk to them everyday and go out of their way to converse. i don't even know my brothers fav color. my mother doesnt know my fav food.#me and my grandma say at most 6 words a day cuz of a language barrier and my father is a baby who doesnt reach out first#i eent to a friends house 2 dsys ago snd the whole family was chatting and the house was so lively and homey#then i go home and nobody says a word to each other. idk what code everyone has that im missing but oh my god im so jealous#im jealous of their relationships their freedom their partners the amount they spend their friendships their personalities#i want to be like them. i want to be them. but im me and the most i said to mom on christmas day was merry Christmas. then get yelled at#l speaks#shut up l#ranting in the tags because i can#its like god took his time making their lives as close to perfect as possible then went to me and was like ehh#he made me odd and offputting enough to make me different then made me 'normal' enough to not raise any flags#then put me in the most virtually normal home environment that at its core is fucked#but idk. its 5 am i havent slept in 2 days merry Christmas happy new year.#posts that couldve gone in the notes app
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pirateborn-a · 1 year
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apologies for prolonged absence ( both here and discord )     mental health wavy-ness + moving/settling into dorms n starting new semester goes brr!  + art/writing block sdfkjlsd will try n get back to things soon as i can though bc continues to think ab blorbos and continues to wish to write them,,,
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marinehero-a · 1 year
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      <- old man who has no idea how to handle grief / emotions in general
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yeonzzzn · 4 months
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can’t help but to think about jake being your family’s car washer, shirtless in the garage, sweat all over his face and dripping down his abs, panting due to extreme fatigue. You can’t help but stare at him as he noticed how you’re drooling over his naked body and how you practically eye fuck him. And of course, who is he to ignore your stares as he walk towards you and made you touch his exposed chests and abs, which leads to the both of you fucking on every car you have in the garage. 🥵
As one of the best writer here in this app, I request you to continue this 🤭 I love your fics btw and thank you for interacting with me 😫
HOLY FUCKING SHHIIIITTTTTTTTT YOUR BRAIN IS CHEF KISS ON G O D. I am so in love with this scenario like just imagining shirtless, sweaty, wet, and soapy jake fucking you on the clean car he just finished washing, leaving soapy stains and hand prints all over the hood…and THANK YOU for requesting this🤭 I am happy you put me into the category as one of the best writers…it gave me a hella ego boost fr fr!! this one is for you bae 😘🩷
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jake x afab!reader word count: 2.2k
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Ever since your family hired Jake as their personal car washer, you’ve struggled to keep your eyes to yourself.
You thought the idea of your family even hiring someone for such a job was, in fact, stupid. Completely ludicrous. Why hire someone to wash your cars when there are LITERAL car washes to drive your car through? Or ya know, the hands of the family members doing it
You guessed since your family had money to blow and not enough time on their hands, hiring Jake was something they wanted. You couldn’t argue with your parents, not when they are paying for your college and letting you live at home still rent-free…who were you to complain?
Obviously, the first few times Jake came to wash the cars, you’d scrunch your nose at him, purposely getting in your car and driving away, making his job harder on him. You didn’t care at first, you thought this idea was stupid and a waste of money when you could just wash your car yourself.
But it wasn’t until you took a nap after class completely forgot Jake was scheduled to wash the cars. Hearing the sound of water from the hose hitting the hoods of one of the cars that you jolted from your bed and quickly rushed to the window peeking behind the blinds, seeing Jake bent over your father's car, clothes completely soaked and soapy with the massive sponge in hand as he cleaned the hood.
You are filled with anger after seeing your car was moved and parked in the grass, seeing it was already cleaned.
Jake wasn’t stupid, he knew you hated him even if it was for reasons unknown, not that he even cared, he was getting paid bank to wash four cars once every week. So when he arrived for his scheduled time and saw your car parked in the garage…oh the sweet shenanigans that filled his brain.
He’d knock on the front door like he does every time, smiling at your mother’s face when she opened the door for him, her earpiece attached to her ear showing that she was in the middle of a meeting. She smiled at him, raising her index finger to her lips and giving him a wink, waving him inside to grab the keys.
Jake grabbed the keys from the key bowl your family kept beside the garage door, his smirk growing ever more wide at seeing your keys sitting there.
So Jake washed your car first, pulling it from the garage. He didn’t even put the seat back into place after he was done like he normally would. He wanted to make your life hell the next time you sat in your car. Wanting to give him side-eyes, scrunched nose, and nasty looks every time you saw him? He’ll play your game. He even moved all the mirrors so you’d have to move them back and purposely leave your car parked in the grass in the front lawn knowing once you put two and two together you’d either rush outside to yell at him or stare at him from the second floor in your bedroom.
But you took too long to notice him, and he went ahead and started on your father’s car.
The early summer heat was making Jake exhausted. He was soaked, had soap literally everywhere, and could feel the sweat dripping down his face and body. He flung his head back, closing his eyes and furrowing his eyebrows cursing the heat. But when he opened his eyes and saw you staring down at him from your bedroom…the game was back on.
Jake dropped the sponge into the water bucket, eyes going back to you and keeping eye contact as his fingers reached for the ends of his shirt, slowly lifting it above and over his head and dropping it onto the ground.
You quickly looked away from the window, slamming your back against the wall, hands slapping against your face.
Oh god, he’s hotter than I thought.
Since then, you didn’t mind Jake being around. You purposely started putting reminders into your phone on the days Jake would show up.
You always found Jake attractive, but that day he took his shirt off…it sent you to another world you didn’t think was possible. You were so angry at your parents for hiring him, but now all you did was thank them.
At first, you tried to hide that you were watching him, but he’d catch you every single time. And as the seasons changed from spring to summer, the less clothes Jake started to wear.
Again, he wasn’t an idiot. Jake knew you were eye fucking him every chance you got. You stopped being so secret at watching him. Giving every excuse in the book to walk into the garage to “grab something” or “get something from your car before he washes it”. It boosted his ego every single time knowing that you wanted him. He purposely started showing up wearing tighter shirts to tight tank tops that showed off his toned arms. Tighter shorts that gave away completely that man is packing.
Jake obviously thought you were hot too and he couldn’t deny that fact he’s thought about dicking you down against every single car in the garage. Imagining how completely dumb he’d have you on his cock.
And he finally was given that opportunity.
It was one of the hottest days of the week. Jake took off his tank top to cool himself off for once instead of doing it to make you tremble. But it worked in his favor as he walked into the garage to cool and dry off before moving the final car back into the garage, and you walked out.
Jake stopped halfway into the garage, eyeing you up and down.
You were wearing a white crop tank top that hugged your breasts perfectly. Jake loved the fact you weren’t wearing a bra, noticing quickly how your nipples poked through. And oh GOD he noticed how tight your shorts were, hugging your thighs and pushing up in between your pussy’s lips, showing off the outline. Jake could only imagine how good your ass looked in those shorts, silently begging that you’d give him an excuse to grab something and turn around so he could see the view.
“Oh uhhh…” you said, eyes scanning his body and stopping at his abs. You weren’t expecting to see him in the garage, clearly already finished his job. Every excuse you had to use was thrown out the window, “Finished already?”
Jake chuckled slowly walking towards you, “Since when have you cared when I’ve…finished?”
Jake was getting too close to you, well not too close to the point you didn’t like it, you obviously wanted him closer, but you weren’t prepared for it at this moment.
“I uhh…” you tried to search for the right things to say, any excuse you could say. At this point any bullshit. You’ve only ever stared at him from a distance, talked to him in passing so you could stare at him. These were the consequences of your actions.
“Use your words, baby,” Jake said, his body now inches away from yours, chuckles escaping his mouth, “What? You were so vocal about how much you hated me when we first met, why so quiet now?”
Because you’re the hottest human being I’ve ever met
You just slightly shrugged, still trying to find literally anything to say.
“I said,” he whispered, his wet, soapy hands grabbing both of yours and blessing them on his wet, soapy, sweaty chest, “Use your words,”
You tried to not moan out just from touching him. The warmth of his chest was enough to send your whole body temperature skyrocketing. Your eyes wander down to his chest, watching as the water mixed with his sweat rolled down his body, how his chest raised and fell, feeling how fast his heart was racing.
You slid your hands down his chest, stopping at the top of his abs, letting your fingers trace around them.
Just from your touch, Jake was already rock hard. He wanted nothing more than to drag you up the stairs and bend you over your bed, face pressed so deep into the sheets while he railed you from behind. But he couldn’t get up the stairs without passing your parent’s shared office. The garage would have to do.
Jake wasted no time flying his hands to your waist and pressing you to him, his lips pressing aggressively with yours.
Your thighs rubbed together at feeling him against you. You wanted him. Oh god did you want him.
Jake mapped out the garage in his mind, looking for a place he could fuck you without making anyone in the house take notice of it.
And there was only one place he could think.
Jake quickly twisted you around, your back being pressed against the hood of your car. The water and soap from Jake’s body were now seeping into your clothes, making them soaked.
Jake groaned at your now wet shirt, your nipples showing through completely and he didn’t even have to remove your shirt for it.
Jake’s lips found yours again, his fingers sliding down to your heat, rubbing it gently. You were already so soaked and he barely touched you.
“Fuck baby girl, already so wet for me?” he smirked against your lips, “Already so needy for my cock.”
You quickly nodded, wanting to feel more than just his fingers rub against your cunt.
“Use your words, we’re both adults here,”
You now wanted to beat the shit out of him. Jake was loving this, loved the way you scrunched your nose at him teasing you.
“Fuck me, Jake.”
Jake took your wrists in his hands, pinning your hands above you, “Where are your manners?” he rubbed his clothed hard dick against your cunt, “Only good girls get what they want.”
You wanted to roll your eyes, wanted to be a brat, but didn’t want to test Jake’s patience.
“Fuck me please Jakey,”
Jake groaned at the nickname, his hand going back down to your folds and sliding your shorts to the side and pushing his wet shorts down far enough to release his throbbing cock.
You bit your lip at the sight of his cock, your pussy clenching around nothing at the anticipation of him fucking you.
Jake lined himself up with you, then pushed himself in.
You wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him closer to you, pushing him deeper inside of you.
“Fuck you feel so good,” he moaned in your ear, having to steady his hands at the side of your head to help fuck into you, “Fantasized so much on how good your pussy would feel wrapped around me.”
You had to bite down on your lip to keep your moans from escaping, not wanting to get caught.
Jake had other plans.
His hand reached up to your chin, fingers pulling your lip from your teeth and spreading your mouth open, “Oh no sweet thing,” he growled, “You’ve been so vocal before, you aren’t going to go quiet now.”
He fucked into your harder, faster, making the car beneath you two shake at his pace, “Moan for me. Moan my name, use that pretty voice of yours.”
You tilted your head to the side, attaching your lips to his ear, moaning out his name.
If you were going to be vocal, it was going to directly be in his ear. And oh man Jake was loving it.
“Fuck fuck fuck,” he groans, his fingers trying to keep their grips on the hood from how wet and sweaty he was, from the soap that covered his body making it hard to keep in place. But he didn’t care. He was balls deep inside you, you were moaning his name like it was the only word you could speak. He was in heaven fucking an angel.
Jake didn’t know how much longer he’d be able to last, your tight cunt was sucking him so good and he was so pussy drunk he knew he wouldn’t be able to stop until he was unloading himself into you. His climax was fast approaching, but he’d be damned if he came before you.
His hand flew to your cunt, thumb rubbing circles against your clit and his lips sucking on your soft spot just below your ear and jaw, “Cum for me baby,”
Your pussy clenched around him, the sensation and the magic of his fingers was sending you over the edge. Your hands gripped the hood of your car the best they could as you released onto him.
“Oh fuck yeah,” he moaned biting your skin, his thrusts slowly coming to a stop as he made one final push, painting your gummy walls white.
Jake placed a kiss on your forehead before pulling out of you and setting your shorts back into place.
Fuck you were a sight to see, looking so fucked out against your car that he just finished washing that now had your and his hand prints all over the hood.
Damn, guess he now has an excuse to have to come back over tomorrow to “wash it again” or better yet fuck you against it and every car in this garage.
And by the look on your face, Jake knew you were thinking the same thing.
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juanarc-thethird · 4 months
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If interested please DM him
Nora: How was your Valentine's Day?
Jaune: Um... Normal.
Nora: You didn't ask a girl out?
Jaune: No...
Nora: Why not?
Jaune: Because no one is interested in me?
Nora: What?! How is that possible?!
Jaune: Trust me, it is possible.
Nora: Not on my watch! *Leaves*
Jaune: Hey! Where are you going?! *Sighs* Whatever, it's not my problem.
The next day....
Jaune: *Reading a book*
*Ting!*
Jaune: Huh? *Checks his phone* An unknown message?
*Ting!* *Ting!* *Ting!*
Jaune: More?
*Ting!Ting!Ting!Ting!Ting!Ting!*
Jaune: What the?
*TING!TING!TING!TING!TING!TING!TING!TING!TING!TING!TING!TING!*
Jaune: WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!!
Momentas later
JNPR's Room
Nora: *Playing games on her phone while lying in bed*
Jaune: *Shows up* *Angry* What did you do?!
Nora: Do what?
Jaune: You know very well what I mean. What did you do?!
Nora: I seriously don't know what you're talking about.
Jaune: I'm talking about this!
Jaune shows his phone, still being bombarded by messages from unknown numbers.
Jaune: Why do I have a bunch of strangers asking me on a date?!
Nora: *Excited* Really?! That means that my post worked!
Jaune: *Confuse* What post?
Nora: This one!
She selects something on her phone and shows it to Jaune.
"Do you want a Man that has abs? Do you want a man that can cook? Do you want a man that is literally the dream house husband?! Well look no further.
Jaune Arc, the only son of the Arc Family.
Let's talk about features: - Power: No - Money: No - A car: No - Great confidence: Nope... but he has a humongous dick that makes up for everything else.
Let me tell you a story. One day I entered the bathroom without checking to see if anyone was there using it. And when I did it, he poked my eye. "With what?" you might ask. I think we both already know answer to that.
You can present him to your parents, to your sibling who never stops bothering you that you are single and alone, to your weird creepy uncles, to your gossiping fat aunts, to your racist grandmother who no one dares to tell her to stop saying rude things, because for some reason everyone is afraid of her. And I can assure you that all of them will change their ways when they see what a good boy this man is. God damn it! Everyone will want to protect this golden retriever of a person!
Good boy Approved!!
Things this man is old enough to do: - Vote: Yes - Consent to Sex: Yes - Becoming Huntsmen: HE IS ALREADY A HUNTSMEN!
This man has history. He's seen some shit. He has done "things" for his friends. He has killed for his friends. He will not judge you like other people.
Interesting facts: - He is a good boy on the outside, but he is a beast on the inside~ *Wink* *Wink* - He is an Arc, so he is designed for breeding. - He holds the record for most boxes of cereal consumed in one day!
What more can you ask for?!
Look...
Let's face the facts. He may not be the most beautiful person in the world, but you aren't either (I mean that's why you're still single). So stop lying to yourself and stop lying to your mom about that "guy" you met at the supermarket. (We both know that's a lie). He may be too good for you, but he's really desperate. So send him a message and try your luck.
Jaune Arc 206-XXX-XXXX"
Nora: What do you think? Very cool, right?
Jaune:...
Jaune: Am I a joke to you?
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queenofcoquette · 10 months
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how i started to feel pretty
hey loves! i’ve struggled with feeling insecure over my looks, but recently i’ve made changes that have helped me be less insecure. little improvements with my lifestyle and mindset have already made a big difference. first i’m going to talk about my insecurities, then what i did and then general tips.
my insecurities:
hyperpigmentation. i have bad undereye bags due to genetics that landed my family to call all of our eyes “raccoon eyes.” then redness above my eyelids, then darkness above my upper lip no matter how much i shaved. 
facial asymmetry. we all have it, but i felt so bad anytime i took a selfie and i couldn’t bear to take any photos of myself. 
body dysmorphia. this one is weird. i don’t view my body the way others do, and honestly the way i view it changes all the time.
changes i’ve made:
first i started doing things that didn’t help. they were temporary solutions that did nothing. i used concealer and powder for the hyperpigmentation- but it looked cakey and a little ashy-kinda cuz i wasn’t using a color corrector. for my body i did these “abs in 2 weeks!” challenges during covid, and was restrictive, which is the worst thing you can do for yourself.
for my skin:
i started using the glycolic acid serum by the ordinary. this stuff is life changing! i’ve been going makeup free on my skin lately and my skin tone has gotten so much more even. plus it’s affordable and it’s a giant bottle.
for my face:
i started doing face massages for muscle tension
i also realized that my facial asymmetry is 1) normal (we all have it to a certain extent and 2) it’s probably not as bad as i think it is. 
for my body:
i’ve started to focus more on health than appearances, because that my view of my body is distorted. i don’t see it like other people do, so i need to prioritize my health. i started eating MORE- more foods that are healthy, more fruits and vegtables. instead of restricing i allowed myself to have more.
i developed a pilates plan that focused on building strength, and incorporated a little bit of weights. now that i play sports i’ve put an emphasis on strength which has actually helped me get more toned.
journaling. i began to write down about my feelings- the way i view other people vs. the way i view myself. it made me realize how social media gave me an unrealistic image, and how i wasn’t viewing myself the way i really am.
advice:
what are you insecure about? the first step is just writing down your biggest insecurities- aka why don’t you feel beautiful? what made you feel this way? no one is born feeling ugly- we’re all taught to feel this way, whether it’s comments that have been made to us or others.
find people with similar stories. this helped me in the past, watching videos about people who had the same insecurities as me, it opened my eyes to how harshly i treat myself. 
get to the root of it. for my skin i realized that covering up my hyperpigmentation with makeup wouldn’t solve the problem, so i put an emphasis on incorporating things into my skincare routine that could solve the problem, without makeup!
think in the long-term. think about what’s healthy for you, and the most natural way of doing so. for example, when it came to my body i had to think about what’s healthy for me overall, not a quick fix. quick fixes aren’t attainable!
prioritize mental and physical health. i think we should all embrace our natural beauty by focusing on our skincare and the health of our hair. additionally, mental health is equally important, especially when it comes to body image.
positive thinking. a lot of times we tend to vocalize our negative thoughts, ive heard ppl make horrible comments about their bodies and things like that. first of all, stop saying those things out loud- you’re only reaffirming them in your head, and furthering the bad feeling. when you get horrible thoughts about yourself, try to stop them and replace them with good ones. even if you don’t believe it at first, you soon will.
it sometimes takes a while for beautiful people to realize how gorgeous they are. i had friends who i thought were some of the prettiest girls in the world, but they didn’t even realize it. i bet there’s so many people in your life who look at you and see the beauty in you that you don’t see in yourself. just stay healthy and keep positive thoughts, and i hope in time you’ll see your inner and outer beauty.
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jalluzas-ferney · 2 months
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Cole wasnt “changed” to be gay. He never was STRAIGHT in the first place.
and hell- whi says he’s strictly gay now? Cole could like girls as well for all we know 🤷‍♀️ uk like, be a Bi king or smth.
The thing is, just like people are used to seeing characters from books as white as a default until stated otherwise, just because they’re so used to it, this happens with straightness as well.
People are will BEG and SWEAR that a character is straight just because they were never outright stated to be otherwise. And emphasis on “outright stated” because even when there is coding, hinting or just blatant portrayal of it, people will still deny that that certain character is queer because it’s not like they canonically turned to the camera and told the audience that “I AM NOT STRAIGHT.”
But to them, even if the character rarely showed any interest in the opposite gender or ever really talked ab their attraction, the character is just automatically straight. It’s just inherent. Of course they’re straight.
And you know what? Even if the character does, who said Bi people don’t exist? I have a lot of Bi friends and a family member that either are bi or are dating a bi person, and their attraction towards the opposite gender has never invalidated their attraction towards the same if gender non-conforming.
And even then, a lot of gay men or lesbians have struggled with comp-het in the past, reuniting them in having tried to date or even marry people from the opposite gender only to then realize they never truly were straight, and were just compulsively trying to conform or believe that they are straight because again, straightness has always been seen as the status quo. As the normal thing to be. The default.
And this isn’t me saying that “the writers were writing Cole as a dude with comp-het this whole time” or smth because I don’t know that. And while I could theorize that I don’t think the writers really were thinking about implementing compulsive heterosexuality into this silly Lego show.
But just like I can’t assure that Cole canonically has suffered from comp-het or that he is gay and not Bi or hell he could be asexual or smth while being gay WHO KNOWS-but just like we can’t exactly assure that he is exactly one of those labels, people cannot come here and act like Cole was ever REALLY canonically straight. Hell. You could even say None of the characters of the show are STRAIGHT because who said they were? You can def interpret them as straight! But why do people insist on acting as if portraying Cole as having a male character a romantic interest as them CHANGING him as if he really ever WAS straight?
No one acts that when a character is straight that it was a huge betrayal or smth because the character was “OBVIOUSLY” gay by default. No. People just see it as normal and move on because that has always been the status quo.
Because this is a heteronormative society as much as people try to act as if making a character gay is “appealing to the world and the general public” as if straight people are suddenly oppressed. Hetero friends of mine or my family will always automatically assume I’m straight because that’s the norm to them. People will always assume someone it het or cis unless outright stated otherwise.
And if you can’t tell what’s wrong with that…
And you know what? Get all pissed off about it. Complain. Make petition for “saving your boy Cole” (save him from what exactly? It’s not like Christianity exists in Ninjago so yall can scratch hell out of the list at least) the season was made. The character of Geo was made. The scenes where Geo fantasized about Cole being awesome and handsome were made. Scenes where Cole and geo talk about needing each other were made. Scenes where geo and Cole hold hands and look at each other all lovey dovey were made. None of that bigoted complaining is going to change that. Theyre not going back and deleting those scenes and they’re not suddenly gonna write Geo and Cole in completely different way from what they were written before. Womp. WOMP.
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allthegothihopgirls · 13 days
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just finished reading death in the family properly and. whoo the racist undertones are racist undertoning. but uh. wanted to say that i cannot understand why people hated jason back then because like. he’s just a kid. he’s a KID. shaking 80s fans by the shoulders he’s a CHILD. he’s not gonna be a mature adult he’s gonna be a little weird and a little annoying even!! but he is a KID.
also wanted to ask your opinions on the jason has chronic pain headcanon? i personally as someone w chronic pain really enjoy it because it makes sense and i am a firm believer that we need more representation of invisible disabilities like some chronic pain is (and mine is) but ive heard a few people say they don’t like it
— baptism anon
right?? like yeah i think jason dying was the most beneficial thing to ever happen to his character, and he also had next-to-no defining traits as robin apart from being a dick grayson carbon-copy + replacement... but i don't get why people hated him.
~
jason w/ chronic pain!!!!!! oh boy i have feelings about him... i LOVE.
especially when it's death-induced.. a bit like phantom feeling/pain, but instead it is. very. real. like, he has chronic joint pain in places where joker hit him a few too many times etc. personally i reject the 'lazarus pit made him squeaky clean' canon, so on top of him keeping all his scars, and being more frankenstein than man.. chronic pain fits in very well.
i also definitely enjoy headcanons of him with chronic migraines.. not because i'm projecting.
i think it's a pretty agreed-upon headcanon that jason isn't a fan of medication in the slightest, due to his mother's death (only making exceptions when he's sustained more than a minor injury on patrol or a mission and is being tended to).
so i propose, stubborn jason w/ chronic migraines, who will never admit to needing actual medication. obviously he isn't going to be stupid about it, he won't patrol if it's too bad, and maybe tries to ward it off with some regular ibuprofen. but he is so against being properly medicated for prevention or treatment, and gets super defensive if dick or bruce suggest it to him.
he's always in varying levels of head hurt™ and just. lives with it. in the comfort of his own apartment he's definitely not a stranger to herbal teas and heat packs though.. however at the same time he's 100% beating himself up whenever he can't just power through.
i don't think he'd actively tell anyone either. dick figures it out from the way he'll rub at his temples post-patrol, or maybe a couple of unclosed search tabs on a computer 'whydoesmyheadalwayshurt' or 'home remedies: how to naturally prevent migraines'
for bruce finding out i have a bit more of a developed idea. jason's gone out patrolling with a migraine, against his better judgement. he's on comms with bruce, who's getting his assistance on a case he's been tracking. seemingly out of nowhere he hisses a little in pain, and bruce is asking what's wrong.
jason grows defensive quickly and spurts out a routine "imfinedontworry" but was apparently not convincing enough because before he knows it bruce is asking "status?" ..and he swears there's a microchip in him somewhere that forces him to give a truthful answer, because it's not like he wants to tell bruce his head's hurting, because that's just plain embarrassing. he doesn't want people thinking that he can't handle pain that miniscule.
between that and the other times he's been asked "red hood, report" and stated his condition, adding on a "head hurts a bit too, but that's just normal".. it wasn't difficult for bruce to suspect something unusual.
moving away from migraines, i think he also experiences chronic joint pain. compared to the previously mentioned, it's easier to play joint pain off as 'normal' and convince himself there's no cause for concern. he's 100% in denial of having an actual issue, which i'd like to think somewhat comes from bruce experiencing the exact same thing, and jason watching him absolutely refuse to admit any weakness it causes him.
he ends up believing it's just something that happens to everyone (well, at least everyone who dresses up and fights crime on the regular). jason's confused when dick's asking him if he wants to stick around for a chat post-patrol, because is dick not also desperate to go home, ice his joints, and spend time doing stretches to ease his pain before finally getting some sleep?????
i don't think he'd realise that it isn't a normal thing until he's called out on it. maybe he makes an off-comment about 'never feeling 75%, let alone 100%' comfort-wise, and damian remarks how that is. an issue. jason's instantly defending himself "yeah well that's just what happens when you've been in the business for this long-" and dick chimes in to point out that he doesn't feel like that. from there i think he goes to an even larger effort to hide any pain he's in.
big believer in jason being a cane user too. i think babs is the one who convinces him to start using one, after the events of this panel ↓ ↓ ↓ 
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you cannot tell me that she's letting that comment slide: "that book looked... useful" plus "i don't think i've ever been okay", ok jason mr 'i really resonated with this and now i'm having revelations' todd.
she's 100% sitting his ass down for a real talk about whatever he has going on.
and i think afterwards, babs suggests that he really considers mobility aids. to which i think he ends up being very accidentally ableist, in the 'but those are for old people' way. it takes... a lot to reverse his somewhat internalised ableism, and get him to at least try a mobility aid out.
he grows less opposed to it as he realises that it's not something he's obligated to use all the time, and that it works. so he uses a cane around his apartment, and around the manor when he gets to be confident enough (he's a bit worried of people asking questions, but no one even bats an eye, because it just makes sense).
i have a whole other set of thoughts about the batfamily + how they go about jason using a cane... but i think i've gone on for long enough.. my apologies
in conclusion... chronic pain!jason todd is a HUGE headcanon of mine. love it a lot.
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hirocimacruiser · 9 days
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What are old cars like to drive now?
Mazda Familia 3 door full time 4WD1600DOHC turbo review.
The second generation FF Familia tends to be overshadowed by the success of the first FF Familia. The Familia underwent a Key Concept model change in 1985, and the sports version of the 1.6 (twin cam turbo + full-time 4WD) became popular. Yasushi Shimono drove to Osaka for the later model after minor changes.
Text | Yasushi Shimono Photos Chihiro Abe
The other day, I rented a Familia car in Takamatsu, Shikoku. If you see Nippon Rent-a-Car, Toyota Rent-a-Car, and Nissan Rent-A-Car lined up at the counter in the airport lobby, if you're a car fan, you should probably rent a Mazda Rent-A-Car at this time of year.
It's a personal choice, but the Familia 1500AT I rented was actually very nice. The engine and suspension have the solid feel of a German car, and it feels great. Even though I've already driven over 20,000km, I can barely see any wear and tear.
During my summer vacation two years ago, I took a Familia rental car at the station in Tsuruoka, Yamagata Prefecture, and it was a great ride, and my family was happy with it.
For test drives, members of the media always ride in the manufacturer's so-called PR vehicles.
However, when they later try the same car in a rental car, they are often disappointed to varying degrees. I don't have the space to write about the reasons in detail here, but Familia is an extremely rare example of people rediscovering their charm through rental cars. It feels like a very seriously made car.
I am holding this.
FULLY MASCULINE NOUN CAR
In downtown Osaka, I was given a ride on a nostalgic Familia. 1988 model 3 door twin cam turbo 4W.D. It is a full-time 4WD high-performance model that was part of the second-generation FF Familia series that debuted in 1985.
I splurged on expensive 200,000 yen 0Z racing aluminum wheels for the car I bought this spring. There is a bright red mudflap in the wheel arches.
The guard hangs down. The hobby of the owner, Mr. M (35 years old), who really wants to drive a Lancia Delta Integrale, seems to be depicted on the outside.
The inside can also be customized.
It is. The front seats are BRIDE bucket seats. The handle is MOMO's Prototipo. At the tip of the shift lever is a plastic shift knob that looks like a white ball.
The main body of the 1.6LDOHC turbo engine has not been modified, but the muffler and air cleaner have been replaced with "HKS''. The suspension also uses Mazda genuine sports springs combined with GAB dampers. I'm not Kiyoshi Nishikawa, but I get the strong impression that he was trying to do things one by one, starting with what he could do. Mr. M, who works as a tire wholesaler, is a pleasant young man. It is the year of the year. When I pushed in the tape whose head was peeking out from the set, it played Mr. Children, which doesn't really suit Osaka (?).
However, once it started running, the Familia Integrale was a much more radical car than the standard.
First of all, the suspension is much harder than you might imagine from the specs. The ride quality is almost that of a competition vehicle, reacting honestly to the bumps and undulations of the road surface and transmitting short, jerky vibrations.
I didn't think it was power steering at first either. I slowly turned the steering wheel to turn off the engine and realized for the first time that it had power assist. That's how responsive it is. Basically, the normal engine is so energetic that it's hard to believe. Power is already 140 yen on NET display. However, it is more powerful than the face value, and at the signal Grand Prix the acceleration of all four wheels is like that of a rabbit.
I'll show you.
Even though it is a turbo, it starts to crash immediately after idling.
Delivers comfortable torque. The response in the low rotation range is also not bad. Tachometer red zone from 7000rpm. However, the latest 4-valve It's not as smooth and light as the unit.
It has been replaced with an air cleaner for competition. So, at the top end of 6500 or higher, the engine noise, mainly the intake noise, becomes louder.
Air conditioner control panels, air vents, and
-Dark areas where stereo units, ashtrays, etc. are crowded.
There was a designer who once described the center part of the dash as ``the most expensive part of the car's interior,'' but this car has a panel that says ``FULLTIME 4WD'' embedded in part of it. There is. It was kind of noisy. There is also a shiny silver switch inside the spring, and this is for locking the center differential. The owner once benefited from being muddy.
Apparently there is.
The turbo is effective without any noticeable bumps.
It starts to work, and what's more, it works like a turbo. I miss the way the green snail lights up in the instrument panel every time the turbo kick explodes. What's more, every time I shift up and release the accelerator, I hear the resonant whine of the turbine, which is nostalgic. I wasn't able to do it this time due to time constraints, but I was able to drive on mountain passes and some dirt roads, and it still looked really interesting. Manly and sweaty, a perfect masculine noun.
It's Luma.
Of course, the current Familia, which no longer has a sports model in its lineup, is not such a macho car. However, the Familia has always been a car that has not had a fancy feel to it for generations. Fancy is something like ``a womanly thing that a man has come up with.'' I like the character, which is unusual for domestically produced vehicles, but I'm sure there are people who say that's why it doesn't sell well.
PIC CAPTIONS
The second generation FF Familia underwent a full model change in January 1985. It has a 3/5-door hatch and a 4-door sedan body. Initially, it started with 1.3ℓ and 1.5ℓ NA and turbo units, but a 1.6ℓ turbo unit was soon added. The photo is of the later model. The body size is: total length x width x height = 3990 x 1645 x 1405mm. Wheelbase 2400mm.
The steering wheel has been replaced with "MOMO" and the seat has been replaced with "BRIDE". When the New Familia was announced, the company emphasized the improved quality of the interior, saying, ``If the packaging is the same, the quality of the interior is important.''
With minor changes in 8 years, NA unit
The remaining old E-type units were wiped out and replaced by B-type units. Photo of 1597cc 16V DOHC turbo with 140ps @ 6000rpm and 19.0kgm torque @ 5000rpm
Mr. M's Delta Familia has a majestic red mudguard. The ``GAB'' and ``HKS'' stickers and white OZ wheels clearly reflect the owner's taste.
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stupidfateheadcanons · 7 months
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oh i 100% want to know who you think would unironically wear christmas sweaters/and or ugly non denominational ones (and who is easily bullied into wearing them)
Karna
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is canonically autistic about crabs due to their warrior prowess and ability to face their enemies head-on, making a santa-crab sweater the perfect choice as he tries to fit in with chaldea for the holidays.
does not understand why Ganesha makes that Face about it, and later asks his master if they're aware of the significance of the number 420.
Santa Karna
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Has learned how to be more properly Festive, in his perception of the word festive, so his wardrobe gets an upgrade. Also, he's told he's not allowed to attend the Chaldea Holiday Party in his normal Santa Getup. Da Vinci said something about how 'even Santas deserve a day off during the holidays', but she really just wanted him to not get Into It with Santa Quetz.
It fails.
Percival
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Nice, tight fabric that fits snugly over his abs.
Food-themed to delight him as a provider of delicious meals and protection.
Really, just imagine that hunk of man-meat coming up to you with a plate of biscuits and gravy while wearing this. Wouldn't it be heaven?
Vlad (Berserker)
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Would not wear something joke-themed or silly -- at least in his perception. This garment is obviously ridiculous, but he perceives it as proper holiday cheer and a work of art that he crafted himself.
Vlad (Lancer) would also wear ugly Christmas sweaters, but that's more dependent on the vibes of his Master, imo.
Blackbeard
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He's been waiting all year to bust this baby out.
Like really, look at him. He's so happy and enriched.
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Elizabeth Bathory
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More like a sweater-dress than a Christmas sweater, but she'd wear it to the holiday party with a cute pair of tights, chunky shoes, and little candy and present decorations in her hair. Glitter would be everywhere.
Believes caroling is something like a 'mobile idol concert.'
Emiya
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Someone in the extended Emiyaverse makes him wear it, and he puts up with it with a little grumbling. Particularly if it makes his Master and the kids happy.
Kijyo Koyo
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She thinks she looks VERY hip and cool.
Koyanskaya
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Dobrynya makes her wear it.
Himiko
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Enjoys that the little balls bob and shine in the light when she sparkles. Keeps feeling the tinsel and laughing to herself.
Converts her Himiko, himiko, himi-himi-ko to the tune of jingle bells to amuse herself.
Fergus
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Do I really even need to say anything here?
Gilles de Rais (Saber)
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Okay I'm gonna be real, I woke up and this was on the document, so I was like, 'okay, I GUESS this is what Gilles rolls up to the Chaldea Holiday party wearing????'
Seriously. I don't even remember who to blame for this. Did I do it?
Jalter
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Okay, I don't really actually see her wearing this, but it'd be REALLY funny if she did.
Honorable Mentions
Castoria
Wears ugly christmas sweaters every day but christmas because they're cheap and warm. does not know who jesus is.
David and Romani
Much to Romani's chagrin, it is apparently a family commonality to wear stupid Hannukah sweaters (which I am told exist at Target, even if I've never seen one in the wild.) Romani also acquires/makes one for Mash, which she is very happy about because it makes her feel like she fits in. :)
Martha
Has a custom red, white, and green Happy Birthday Sweater. She makes Tarasque wear one too. :)
Rin
Kirei buys her ugly christmas sweaters. rin does not wear them.
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moonshynecybin · 3 months
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it’s probably been said already but rosquez howl’s moving castle
INSANE!!!!!!! vale's tiny earring vaguely androgynous wizard swag... old man marc... this got long?? under the cut
and see the thing is. i think this is a unique kind of torture for someone like marc. truly. like marc knows he's hot. marc enjoys people thinking he's hot. even in this universe, where he's sadly running the family shop so alex doesnt have to, i simply must believe he has six pack abs and is in fact invested in making people look at them. like he views his body as a machine, hes very active, he would NOT enjoy all of the new aches and pains and limitations that come with being magically EIGHTY. so after the witch of the wastes (uccio?? someone jealous and in love with vale LMAOO) brushes in to the hatshop that night and hates marc on sight/fundamentally alters his body, i think he IMMEDIATELY starts militantly looking for a solution.
the solution: the wizard valentino is this oft elusive but INCREDIBLY charismatic wizard known by whisper and rumor to a. be insanely powerful and b. eat the HEARTS out of his young suitors. and marc (CRAZY MAN.) goes oh well im not hot anymore so he wont do that to me. i will make him fix me! and then he invites himself into vale's home and refuses to leave! says i am your new HOUSEKEEPER. and you will help me break my curse thank you :)
BUT: instead of a mystical and powerful wizard, hes confronted with the HOT GUY that he met several weeks ago that he helped escape from the witch of the waste's GOONS. he was like. walking home. and vale (in his big poofy shirt) whisks him into a scheme... looks at marc all bright eyed mischief... and marc hasnt had any enrichment in his enclosure in so long and just feels LIT UP from the inside, falls into step with vale immediately, matching him as they go. feels ALIVE for the first time since alex took his apprenticeship in another town... so he helps vale escape, flirts with him a LOT and laughs even more. smitten. but crucially and unfortunately, he also has NO idea who vale is throughout this. so later when he walks in the door and finds out that the guy he has a major crush on is also THE WIZARD VALENTINO. who also has a small FLEET of HIGHLY SKEPTICAL teen boy apprentices that marc is now kind of in charge of coparenting and like. convincing to clean their rooms, its a bit of an insane time to be marc.
so some WILD but highly amusing control freak behavior from marc ensues.. lots of little frictions as he arrives... pushback from the kids, vale acting cold and dismissive, a brand new body that doesnt do what he wants it to do... but after a while, marc MAKES space for himself. forcibly improves their lives. settles in to a FAMILY and CRUCIALLY starts emotionally fulfilling the little feral animal inside him that yearns to throw himself off of motorcycles at high speeds. get this many adrenaline seeking freaks that know MAGIC in one place and they are inventing new types of danger Know This. marc is with vale and the kids doing insane shit. and for the first time since he took over his family's shop, he is allowing himself to do what he LOVES. find his purpose. enjoy a community. relieve some of the crushing weight of familial responsibility. its literally the best hes ever felt. and he is. SO in love. so so in love.
BUT im gonna pull something from the novel here: marc is also an incredibly powerful sorcerer. has been forever. he just has NO IDEA. like i see marc literally his entire life using magic in little ways to influence all of the crazy thrill seeking stuff that he's done, but entirely unintentionally. but vale fucking knows. could see it the second they met. in FACT. marc has already broken his curse (marc doesnt know that). but he likes sticking around vale. so he's unconsciously keeping himself old so he can avoid leaving. truly, like when he isnt thinking about his body and hes normal and happy he looks like his actual age. marc with silver hair just laughing with vale and the boys... smile lines staying there but wrinkles fading more and more as time passes... he doesnt want to go back to his old life!!! back to being unremarkable in the hatshop like he knows he should!!! and everytime he remembers he looks decades older... but vale doesnt want to lose him either. so he doesnt tell him. but he also vant make a move with it hanging over them like that... so they live in a fraught equilibrium of pining that is also lowkey a marriage LMAO. like you are coparenting. jesus.
EYE THINK. that the breaking point here is alex returning at some point. talking with marc. and marc is. SO happy to see alex. smiling as hard as he can. but also he looks older than he's looked since he first arrived. all of that responsibility and guilt rushing back for abandoning his life at the hatshop. and it TEARS into vale like omg i am keeping him here selfishly away from his brother.... so he sends him away, "breaks" his curse. and marc thinks hes being DUMPED. and thats how the divorce happens....
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badaziraphaletakes · 14 days
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In which some poor innocent unsuspecting reader submitted an ask and I respond by throwing an entire textbook at them
Like seriously i won’t even be upset if no one reads this PhD dissertation, like actually what is wrong with me omg
The ask:
I want to start by saying I love this account and really appreciate the rebuttals I see here to some of the messed up stuff the fandom’s spit out over the past few years. That being said, the most recent post about “the creepiest take you’ve ever seen,” was one I disagreed with strongly. It’s entirely normal to enjoy watching media where characters have breakdowns. It is not a desire to see a person breakdown. It is a desire to watch a good story.
(Edit: Just realized I somehow omitted to include the full text of the ask here. I apologize for the error! Will fix it soon. -Mod X)
My response:
Hi and thank you for your kind words! (Also idk why there is this huge gap in the text here, sorry haha!) If it were a necessary part of the story, or a part of the story that made sense, I would agree. But it’s not necessary (esp not at this point in the story) and therefore wouldn’t be “good”, if we are defining good art as being emotional truthful, which I imagine is a pretty uncontroversial definition.
Side note: We already saw him have this exact shattering breakdown in Uz. So that renders most of what I am about to say (and arguably some of what you have said) somewhat moot. But I’m going to continue anyway because some of the points brought up here touch on issues that I think bear re-visiting often.
It’s cathartic, it’s engaging, and it helps people who’ve been through the same thing see themselves reflected. For example, I like watching someone on tv hit rock bottom with their addiction because I’ve been through that, and seeing them finally realize they have to work on recovery and actually do it is motivating and empowering.
I’m so sorry you’ve been through that. I haven’t (although I am estranged from an entire side of my family due to alcoholism and meth addiction, which is a whole fun thing), so I can’t comment on this too much.
But addiction is not the same as an ab*sive relationship. (I do have knowledge of those, both from life experience and from my previous job in ab*se research. I edited a newsletter about family violence research for several years.) Seeing a person suffering from addiction realize they want to work on recovery, and realize that the substance they are addicted to is messing up their life, can make sense. Especially if they're in a place where they're able to work on it and have the opportunity to try to change.
But seeing an ab*se survivor “realize they need to get away from their ab*ser because they’re evil and have a breakdown about it” doesn’t make sense, because being trapped in an absive situation is not about “motivation” or what they think about the abser or even, really, about "empowerment". (Side note that word is thrown a lot to delude women into thinking our capitalist system is working for us rather than oppressing us. But I digress.) It boils down to the fact that they are in danger if they leave. The situation is not within their control.
(This next part is not directed at you, but at the general readership, in case this is helpful discussion for anyone: A lot of addictions aren’t within people's control at all either. It depends very much on the drug we’re talking about, the health of the individual, the quantity and duration of the addiction, whether the person has access to the healthcare they need to be cured, and whether there’s a way for them to get free from the broader societal dysfunctions that led to them being trapped in this situation in the first place.)
Also, with addiction, people can absolutely get past that without losing their sense of self and their identity. If they go through that kind of crisis in the process of healing from addiction, I would argue that something is very wrong. (Not with them, but with the society around them). In a best-case scenario, a person suffering from addiction would have access to the kind of mental and physical healthcare and support system that lets you get free from that without a shattering breakdown or loss of sense of self.
Besides, not everyone who has an addiction has toxic beliefs about themselves or their own identity or other people, etc etc. (Babies who are born addicted come to mind, if we want to talk about the most extreme example.) So I find the idea that addiction is down to toxic beliefs about one's self very suspect. I would argue that 95% of the time, addiction happens because your life sucks. The mental health community is starting to have this conversation about depression and anxiety - Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to work on one's "limiting beliefs" and "destructive thought patterns" can only do so much to help you feel better when your whole life is shit anyway. And it can actually make it WORSE if the victim is made to believe that their depression is the fault of their "Faulty thoughts" rather than a reasonable reaction to a shitty situation. Not necessarily saying we should throw CBT out the window altogether, but I am saying that mental healthcare will be a LOT more effective when it learns to truly take the broader societal context into account. I suspect, I hope, we'll soon be having a simialr conversation around addiction.)
And that’s doubly the case for ab*se survivors. They’re not stuck in that situation because there’s something wrong with them that they need to fix. They’re stuck in that situation because there’s something wrong with the ab*ser.
Regardless of the victim’s personal worth as an individual, regardless of whether they’re a good person or what-have-you, they don’t deserve to be ab*sed.
(I'm just waiting to hear about how some therapist tells a victim to work on their "limiting belief" that they need to stay with their ab*ser in order not to be killed, and/or tells them that fearing their ab*ser will kill them is a "cognitive distortion", and tells them to stand up to their ab*ser and/or leave, and then the ab*ser kills them. But I digress.)
And the loss of self when separating from a toxic system that’s defined your whole life is a real thing some people go through. It’s not bad consider that Aziraphale could also go through that, or to want to see that experience reflected.
I want to be very clear that I don’t have the smallest objection to people wanting to see that in a show. But a. that’s not what the person was saying, and b. they were also saying it’s necessary. IT’S NOT. I can’t emphasize this enough.
Loss of self is the worst-case scenario for how something like that goes. Nothing good comes from that. That is a side effect of ab*se (because the ab*ser’s the one who says that “Everything you are is bound up in me and you’re nothing with me"), not an integral part of the process of getting away.
Trauma is not necessary for character growth.
The way these things should go is that the person is able to gradually and mindfully work through the beliefs that are poisoning them with the help of a therapist, trusted friends, etc.
I know what I’m talking about. I worked in trauma research for over seven years. Please trust me on this one.
And again, Aziraphale can’t “separate” from them anyway. There’s nowhere he can go where they won’t find him. So his beliefs are irrelevant to his situation. And if the show implies that his beliefs “need to change” as part of the earth being set free from heaven-hell’s tyranny, or that he “needs to change” in order to be free, I will be writing a strongly-worded letter to the creators.
But more importantly, *they didn’t just say giddy.* They also said apprehensive. Perhaps they’re apprehensive because they know it could be painful to watch. Or because they don’t want to see it handled poorly.
“Giddily apprehensive” sounds an awful lot like “excited” to me. I admit it is ambiguous, though, so I’ll give you that one. I maintain that the OP expressed themselves with an exceptional lack of grace, however. And fwiw, they’d be FAR from the first person to want to see Aziraphale suffer because they are mad at him. I think I have good reason to believe that's what they're getting at here, given how many people in the poster's orbit say the same kinds of things and how many other things I've seen the OP say that are along those lines. I acknowledge I should have made that clearer in my original post.
They aren’t giving this advice (if one could call it that) to a human. They’re saying they’re excited to see a character breakdown. Character arcs like that are common and enticing for good reason.
I have yet to see a reason why I should believe that the things people say about Aziraphale are different than the things they say about people in real life.
I would point you to a couple lines down where you say yourself that we respond to characters the same way we respond to real people.
Personal growth ≠ character growth.
But what makes a good character is that they act like real people.
As an audience, character growth (even negative) is engaging.
Yes, absolutely. But we can absolutely do character growth in a way that does not spread harmful mindsets or misinformation about what ab*se and recovery from ab*se looks like. In fact, I would argue that character growth can’t happen if the writer doesn’t write the characters to behave in a way that is realistic to real life.
Characters follow the same rules, though. We respond to characters the same way we respond to real people. The same general rules of personal development and so forth apply.
The idea that “Aziraphale realizes his ab*sers are terrible” is something he needs to do for his “personal development” is highly objectionable. He doesn’t need to grow in this area. He just needs his ab*sers to leave him alone. Side note: We should give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he already does think they’re terrible and only stays with them because he is terrified. Even if this hadn’t been strongly and frequently hinted at in every episode going all the way back to S1E1 - almost every scene, in fact - we should still give him the benefit of the doubt.
Also, even if we say, for the sake of argument, that Aziraphale was a terrible, awful, horrible person - I know you’re not saying that, to be clear - even then, he still wouldn’t “need to realize his ab*sers are terrible” or “have a complete breakdown” or “lose himself” in order to grow. That's not how growth works. The best growth happens when people are at peace and safe and loved. Not frightened and confused and alone. He never chose them in the first place, he never wanted to be on their side. If he were left alone, he would just spend the rest of eternity reading his books and eating Eccles cakes and snuggling with his former-demon. That’s who he really is. There’s nothing about him as a person that needs to change. I agree a story where a person loses their sense of self after escaping from an ab*sive system would be interesting to watch, but I maintain that it does not make sense for the context of this particular story. And, such a story would NEED to make clear that the person wasn’t bad or wrong for deriving some part of their sense of self from the ab*ser and that they shouldn’t have had to have a catastrophic breakdown in order to develop their own sense of self. No one should have to go through that.
It’s not the same thing as asking for personal growth from a real human being.
Good characters do not operate according to different emotional and psychological rules than we do, though. If they didn't, we wouldn’t have millions of people sobbing about how real Aziraphale and Crowley feel to them. We would be the biggest dodos in the world if we were reacting this way to paper dolls 😄
Comparing the desire to see a character go through a dramatic storyline like that (and to come out of it strong and shining) to fundamentalist rhetoric is… just total bullshit.
You said this blog has been a good place for you and I want it to continue to be that way for you. So I want to give you a chance to revisit this part and see if you can say something more constructive. Because I've gotta admit, this really made me upset and I can't let it go without saying something. It’s not cool to call someone’s commentary “bullsh*t” like this.
I heard the line “we must die to ourselves” many, many times from the high-control religion of my childhood. It is a classic cult line. Hence why so many cults have "burial and rebirth" rituals, make people change their names, etc.
I am not just making up a comparison. This is a real phenomenon. Controlling ab*sers are the ones who’ve given us this idea that “death of the self” is character growth. It’s not. Character growth happens in spite of those excruciating emotional crises, not because of them.
Growing as a person is supposed to feel good overall. Not always easy, but on the whole, it should be a positive experience.
Also - Again, they said he “needs” to do it.
And they didn’t say anything about Aziraphale “coming out strong and shining”. You added that in. I think it's wonderful that you want to see that for him (so do I) but that’s not what this person was saying
If they'd said that, I wouldn't object to it at all. But they didn't. That part was left out. Which I think may be very telling in itself.
There are a myriad of reasons someone could have that desire, including having gone through something similar themselves.
Having gone through something similar doesn’t necessarily mean it makes sense for another character. It also doesn’t mean it’s necessary. And having been through something that went a certain way does NOT mean that it happening that way makes sense for someone else.
Deconstruction from a religious upbringing is different from leaving an ab*sive relationship
Aziraphale doesn’t have religious trauma. (I’m not going to talk much about religious trauma and deconstruction here, because it’s outside the scope of this blog, largely because - as attested by no less an authority than Neil Himself - Good Omens is not about religion. But I’ll say a little bit.)
Heaven and hell are not a “religion” in his world - they’re real. His fear of hell (and of heaven) is absolutely, one hundred percent, completely legitimate and appropriate, and NOT something he should be “reasoned” out of. Saying otherwise gives “your ab*ser isn’t actually that evil and scary”. But regardless, in either scenario, that kind of traumatic personal crisis is not a necessary part of the healing process. My heart aches for all the people whose deconstruction process was emotionally shattering. But what makes it ache even more is how for so many of them, the takeaway is somehow that that kind of crisis is necessary - rather than "dear god, i hope no one else ever has to go through that kind of hideous experience to get away from their shitty religion", which surely is what the takeaway should be (assuming there even is a lesson to be learned at all from an experience like that, which is doubtful) - and they go on to demand it of other survivors and gatekeep against people who haven't gone through the exact same thing they did in the process of getting away.
How, HOW did we get to a point where so many people’s deconstruction is a fucked-up, scarring experience that we think it’s inevitable for deconstruction to be that way????? I grieve.
I know the idea of killing one’s old self is inherently wrong to many people.
It’s not about whether it’s *wrong*. If that's valid for someone and they get where they need to be - you do you. It’s about the fact that it’s painful and it’s unnecessary to the process of growth.
Furthermore, it is the kind of thing ab*sers WANT to see happen to their victims when they leave. They want victims to think that they have to have that kind of crisis if they want to leave them. Because then they’re less likely to leave. When we encourage that kind of thinking, we are playing directly into their hands.
What should happen is that the victim should be given the opportunity to realize that all along there was much more to them than their ab*ser.
I don’t personally desire to watch Aziraphale do that, especially because there are so many wonderful aspects of the Angel he’s been since the beginning
Agreed.
But fwiw, this is giving a faint whiff of perfect victim syndrome. Even if he were an asshole, he still deserves to just have his ab*sers leave him alone, not to have some kind of shattering, soul-crushing emotional breakdown. They will always, always be worse than him.
but it’s not wrong to want to see that. People do go through it, and their stories are incredibly compelling.
I don’t disagree. For me it’s rather about the place this is coming from. OP was saying it’s necessary. There’s a difference between wanting to see a show address this issue overall because it’s interesting, and demanding that a specific character go through it because you think it’s necessary, or that their process of leaving and healing won't be legitimate (or whatever word we wanna use) if it doesn't happen.
And, as you said, it doesn’t make sense for Aziraphale. If the character is an asshole, I’d be able to see it a little more (although again, I still very much question the entire idea in the first place) But he's not an asshole. I find anyone’s thinking it “makes sense” for him to be highly questionable.
I know Aziraphale is much more than a character to many people
Speaking as a (very, very, very slightly, lol) professional writer and actor - every character should be “more than a character”, if they’re well-written. They should feel real if the writer and/or actor has done their job well. I like NG's line that "If you write someone who is utterly and completely themselves, you get people coming up to you and going 'Oh my God, you wrote my life!'
a desire to watch him go through a psychological breakdown is not some poorly concealed desire to watch real people go through that.
It may or may not be. I agree that it isn't always.
In this person’s case, though, I very much did get concerning vibes. Poorly concealed. (As an ab*se survivor, you start to know the vibe of victim-blamers after awhile.)
Regardless, though, the way we respond to characters is the way we respond to people in real life. Story is a primary vehicle through which people learn how to interact with one another and their environment. If it wasn’t, discussing media along these lines would be pointless, and I'd just spend all my time talking about how good David Tennant looks in those tight pants 😁 Or, probably, I would take up a different hobby altogether.
I wouldn’t have wasted my time starting this blog if the things people say about this story and especially about Aziraphale didn’t have real-world applications (not to mention making a lot of ab*se survivors feel very unsafe in the fandom - before we turned off anonymous asks, I got an average of two messages a day from ab*se survivors and other oppressed people telling them how this blog has made them feel so much safer in the fandom) - and if their views about the characters didn’t mirror the kinds of things they’d say about people in real life. (All the anti-Aziraphale autiphobic takes come to mind.) I flatter myself I have enough judgment that those takes wouldn't have troubled me so deeply if they weren't reflective of real-world societal problems and indicative of problematic attitudes in the people who write them.
In this case, the wording is identical to the kinds of problematic things people say about real-life victims/survivors. Yes, the person may not actually consciously want (or want at all) to see real-life ab*se victims/survivors suffer. But I absolutely, one hundred per cent guarantee you that anyone saying this has some major problematic biases/assumptions that are contributing to how ab*se survivors are maligned, degraded, and oppressed in our society. (I never want to see Disabled people suffer, but if I say ableist things, I’m contributing to it whether I mean to or not. I may not want to see women suffer, I am a woman, well more or less anyway lol, and I've identified as a feminist my entire adult life, but nevertheless there have certainly been times in the past when I've said sexist things. It's something all of us will always have to be vigilant against in ourselves. I suspect at this point I'm preaching to the choir, because you do not strike me at all as a bigoted or ignorant person, but I figured I'd re-iterate all that again anyway, because screaming it through a megaphone as often as possible is what this blog is for lol. :)
And what’s worse, they are spreading that rhetoric. I’ll be damned if I’ll let it go by without saying something.
Hope this makes sense and cleared some things up.
With love and respect,
Mod X.
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raineadey · 1 year
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ok so after reading 7 ao3 pages of gustholomule fics ive concluded a couple common things ive seen of this pairing:
these boys love going out at 3 am
gus can not cook
matt being rly good at drawing
matt finding out that gus kept his artifacts
gus and his delirious rambling abt matt when sick
the keeper enjoys seeing these two dance around each other
matt staying over at gus' house and being awkward around perry
perry (and literally everyone else who arent their friends) thinking theyre dating
steve and matt having the "i may or may not have kidnapped your friend as a scout" "you WHAT" talk
gus memorizing every detail of matts appearance and behaviour so he can easily tell if an enemy disguised as his friend
matt learning illusion magic with gus and it being like: "think of an image, anything. focus hard on the details that image and the illusion should be fine" "*accidentally makes an illusion of gus. bonus points if hes smiling*"
gus is the one who drives
matt clinging onto gus as he flies
graveyard adventures
matt pulling a few strings and getting gus back in the has
gus loves playing with matts hair
matts family owning the book nook
did i mention going out on midnight walks
gus being the only one matt can slowly trust to be vulnerable around
gus having a bit of a crush on steve bc he reminds him of matt
matt hiding under his hoodie
cattholomule. nya and stuff
steve playing counselor for matt when he has a fight with gus
gus taking care of matts clumsy self
matt knowing a bit of healing magic
ice scream date !!
gus trying to get matt to sit with him and the hexsquad during lunch
matt idly making mini gus figurines out of wood. bonus if gus finds out and wants one to keep
matt lending gus a shirt but its too small
they are so normal ab each others hands
feel free to add
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marinehero-a · 2 years
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everytime i think ab garp i am just. so normal
#{ ooc } ✗ 「 wenp reporter 」#[ trying to find specific panel but inevitably just rereading some bits and just.#[ he is /such/ a good character im#[ head in hands fr!!#[ he's such an incredible and legendary marine.#[ he cares so much for his family#[ these things are not allowed to co-exist#[ still have drafts for those ace death reaction sitting there waiting to be completed..... should get back to those bc just#[ always talk ab it and will continue to talk ab it bc i am normal fr but#[ constantly holding roger and how he is the Embodiment of freedom through utter Love and all its selfishness#[ and how garp Envies that /so/ much and how he wishes he could be the same but ultimately believes in something greater than himself#[ he cannot choose his family no matter how much he loves them and cares for them and wishes he can because#[ he cannot believe in something other than Justice he hates so much of it but he believes in it keeping peace rotates quote ab#[ 'as long as no blood is spilled im willing to call it peace' and just this is his entire life. He was raised by and grew up in#[ and around this this is his /life/ this is what he believes in because ace and luffy /are/ criminals#[ even if they're good men even if they're family he wont do anything but he understands what 'must' be done#[ even if he hates it and disagrees bc he gets it!!! he /gets/ it but he also shakes like rat he wants to be free soo bad#[ 100% if luffy were ever to be caught though he would. he cant. he would openly betray the navy but he Knows that#[ he knows that he would and he would warn sengoku or whoever else ahead of time bc this is all he is and just#[ so normal about him fr#[ and dont get me started on his whole relationship with sengoku which boils down to incredible trust but also#[ difference in morals/beliefs that never let them truly get along but they still cared and just#[ god he cares and loves his family so much and yet its not enough to overcome his sense of duty#[ man just. ik marineford was Huge for several reasons but just.#[ shakes garp#[ the scene afterwards with makino and dadan just. captures it perfectly. he was there but couldnt do shit#[ but it was because he chose duty and luffy suffered the most and garp /knows/ it#[ i think garp really. really was glad that dadan beat him up okay so glads a weird word but#[ he needed it someone other than himself to punish him because?? being praised??? for killing his grandson??#[ might make that a seperate post got something in inbox that fits the bill but just
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Hi!!! Can you do a raph x male reader (because we need more rottmnt x male reader stuff) where the reader has magic that is inherited from his family and is a total badass when he uses Them? If you don’t want to do it Then that’s totally fine <3
Anon this is amazing!! ❤ I am so happy I'm getting male reader requests since my brother also reads and writes fanfiction, and sometimes complains that its hard to come by male reader stuff. So i'm happy to help in that department!! (P.S. this isn't my gif! I found it on pinterest and I believe the original postet is @ingunnsara here on tumblr!)
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RAPH WITH A BADASS MALE!READER
When you and Raph started dating, neither of you had any clue you had mystic powers.
So the first time you did some badass magic moves,
The two of you kinda stood there like, "Whhhaaaattttt..."
TBH he was like really impressed.
And also kinda flustered.
'Cus like, he's used to being the protector,
Both for you and his brothers.
So the realization that his boyfriend could totally kick someones ass made you like 10x hotter.
Like you two are now the worlds most unstoppible power couple.
His new favorite thing is when you two train together,
Raph just loves that now he gets to spend time with you when he normally wouldn't.
And he's happy that you take your new training schedual so seriously.
Especially when you tell him that the reason is so you can make sure he's safe the way he's always done for you.
You are now a regular part of their team,
And you always join them on missions.
Raph still has that little bit of doubt though.
What if you get hurt?
And what if it happens when he's not there to protect you?
Like, yeah, you have mystic powers now,
But, you can still get hurt.
You just have to reassure him that you'll be fine,
And that nothing will stop you from coming back to him.
Just make sure if you do get hurt,
That you comfort him.
'Cus it will shake him up real bad.
But that rarely ever happens.
Sometimes Raph jokes that you'll replace him as the muscle of the team.
And you're definitly on your way.
All that training totally toned you some abs.
Your not ripped, per se,
But your muscle's are definitly more noticable.
And by noticable I mean that Raph has been caught staring more than once.
Just cut him some slack, poor boy doesn't know how to stop staring,
Your just so damn handsome.
And he's well aware that you be able to totally kick his ass.
.........................................
There you go Anon! I hope this is too your liking, sorry it's kinda rushed, but I just REALLY wanted to post this one!
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ROUND 2 MATCH 37
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Leos propaganda:
“This propaganda will have spoilers because you need to understand just how much I love this man. 
Raen (player character) first meets Leos (1 of 3 love interests) in a town. Raen literally runs into his six pack abs and has the choice to take his hand or get up himself. Then later you find Leos when the place Raen and another love interest have been staying is literally caught on fire. Leos saves you from other assassins but turns out he's also an assassin but he's been hurt. So Raen helps him out. And they travel together with the other two potential love interests. And you find out that Raen and Leos were raised in a completely isolated town and don't know anything about the concept of love, sex, etc. This leads to shenanigans like them walking into a shop to buy Leos whips (for weapons) and the shop having whips (for fun times). They have an absolute slow burn enemies to lovers. Also plot twist at the end you discover that Raen is descended from the royal family and Leos is descended from the highest ranked of the royal family's royal guard. They're literally prince and knight. I can't. The tropes. They're so soft. I am not normal about these two.”
Huntress propaganda:
No Huntress propaganda :(
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