#I don’t pee for four hours in the morning and three in the afternoon

[eirianerisdar]

A different sort of post today

Sitting in my consultation room and trying not to cry

Being a doctor isn’t money or dreams or white coats.

It’s graduating at 23 and working your twenties away. I’m 27, almost 28, and I work 5.5 days a week and see 58-71 patients a day. I used to work 100 hour weeks before. This isn’t better.

It’s having only 4 hours to see 38 patients, sometimes all of them new cases with multiple complaints which means you get around five minutes to see a patient for an average of four problems, because you also have admin work to finish in those four hours or the nurses get mad.

It’s being so exhausted you don’t see friends on the 1 weekend day you have;you just work. If you want to sleep in on weekends you don’t; you just work.

I feel a little like a ghost. I’m wasting away bit by bit and our whole cohort in our department is so burnt out we want to leave and yet our head of department says he won’t do anything about the patient quota.

At this point I think he wants us dead

#medicine #doctor #residency #I don’t pee for four hours in the morning and three in the afternoon #if I have night clinic I don’t pee from 6pm til 10pm #because you don’t have time to pee #if you want to eat you have to rush cases #I have exams next year again and when precisely am I supposed to revise if I work like this #sorry guys this is depressing but I am about to wither away in the middle of my consultation room #my post #personal #medical happenings #might delete later

[bonfire-at-the-crossroads]

I’m going to try and list the events of today - just so I don’t lose track.

Dawn. Barnum got us moving by 7:00 as usual. Maggie had a pee accident in the night, and the stench was horrible. Bri took Bernie and Maggie out, I took Murphy, and followed up with the Woodge.

Fed the cats and started a fire in the stove in the kitchen. Yeah…we ran out heating oil yesterday afternoon. Had a limited supply of wood and coal, but it began to take the chill off…

Maggie threw up.

And now it gets serious. I googled up pyometra a deadly infection which un-spayed female dogs can get post-heat. Yup. Bri called the vet and talked them into seeing her immediately.

He called the fuel oil company and begged for a delivery - then off he went with Maggie into town.

I continued cleaning and moving things back to the studio - my client guy is coming at 2:00 to pick up his paintings. I bake two loaves of cinnamon bread, and loaf of white bread for tomorrow mornings breakfast. Swill down a cup of coffee, and keep tidying up.

The belt on the dryer busted yesterday, leaving me with two loads of wet laundry which will continue to be wet and will soon begin to get moldy. Bri ordered a replacement part and we will look forward to taking the dryer apart (AGAIN) in about a weeks time.

I mix a bucket of green mold killer and have a go at the front step and walkway - it’s become ridiculously slippery and neither one of us wants to hit the ground hard. I scrub with a chunk of old broom, and leave it to do its thing…

Bri returns with some cat and dog food procured from the vets - but no Maggie. “Shes going to have surgery today. She’s infected and has to have a hysterectomy.”

Barnum had surgery four days ago to remove a cancerous mass in his belly. Now it’s Maggie’s turn.

I take Murphy out again, apply the xeroxed info onto the back of all the completed paintings, and keep tidying. Magda the vet calls to say that Maggie will be operated on this evening, and promises to call and let us know how things went.

The oil guy shows up, pumps €500 into the tank - and leaves. Bri goes out to jump start the boiler.

It doesn’t start. “I’m going to drive to Belleek and buy more wood and coal” - and so he does.

I find the boiler-guys phone number. He’ll be here in two hours.

My client shows up, we chat, drink coffee - he refuses my cinnamon bread, but likes Woodgie very much? We load his Mercedes with the paintings (he’s brought me another BIG one) - I tuck several of my pillows and blankets around the art to cushion them for the ride home.

He does not hand me money.

Which leaves John the boiler guy unpaid. He arrives, works his magic over the next hour - I wrap up a fat slice of cinnamon bread and tell him we will drop his money off at his house tommorrow.

I start making the dough for tonight’s pizza. A figure looms in the doorway - it’s Pat. “I’m just coming from a funeral in Kilty and had to stop as we were passing. Do you mind if I show some people your house?”

Pat is always welcome, I would say “drunk or sober” but somehow we never see “sober”

He rolls in. He is followed by four other people from the funeral - three of whom are smashed. The kind woman who IS sober apologizes for the drop-in, but it really doesn’t matter at this point. They are roaming around the house, tripping over dogs and enjoying Pats tour.

The funeral is for a young g man who “was shot” -?! There is confusion as to whether it was suicide? “In his side” - and yet nobody mentions murder. We offer our sincere condolences.

The tour comes to an end, they all roll outside again - and we bid them farewell- “safe home.”

It’s now 8:00. The pizza dough is rising, the dogs are passed out in front of the fire - and we still have not heard from the vet.

It’s been a day, and no mistake.

[floralseokjin]

PBN drabble; A surprise

warnings; smidgen of angst, fluff!!  word count; 1.6k

author’s note; i know i’ve missed a lot of the in between, and i will try to catch up on those drabbles at a later date, but the need to write this was too much. it’s been an idea of mine for ages, finally had to share!! please enjoy the surprise 😘

5:15. 

Yoongi would be home any minute now. Your gut turned, a new kind of sick twisting your insides. For the past four days you’d felt awful. Throwing up a handful of times too. Yoongi was hellbent it was the steak you’d eaten on the weekend. You weren’t so sure. The restaurant you’d had it from was your favourite. You always ate there. 

No. This was a different kind of sick. You’d had food poisoning before, it was horrific. It wasn’t stomach flu either. Yoongi was fine, so it wasn’t catching. This was different. More of a constant nausea. It reminded you of carsickness. You used to suffer with that a lot when you were kid. 

You hadn’t thought much of it at first, maybe you were just tired or something, under the weather, but then Seulgi and her logic had suggested something yesterday afternoon. Maybe you were pregnant. Of course she’s been joking around, but you couldn’t shake it. What if you were?

You’d stopped taking the pill two months ago, wanting to try another form of contraception after giving your body a few months break. You’d been told your periods could be irregular to start off with, so while the first had come on time, you hadn’t thought much of the second one being late. Some of the signs had been there. Bloating, painful boobs, tiredness... just no actual period. A quick google search told you they were also early signs of pregnancy. Impossible. Surely? You’d been using a condom every single time. Although maybe they weren’t the most effective. What if one had split without you both realising? 

This morning Yoongi had already left for work by the time you’d woken up, still feeling rough. Your heart had sunk. There was only one thing left to do. Just to put your mind at ease. You needed to take a pregnancy test. Calling out of work (for the third day in a row), you’d gotten showered quickly, making the short walk to the drugstore in record time. You were being stupid, you kept telling yourself. You repeated it over and over again as you walked home. Over and over again as you rushed to the bathroom and peed on the stupid stick. There was no way you were pregnant. There couldn’t be. 

Could there? 

Waiting those three minutes for the results were the most nerve-racking (and longest) of your life, but nothing could prepare you once you saw those two pink lines. It was like your world had stopped. This wasn’t real. It couldn’t be. You immediately threw up. Whether it be from actual morning sickness, shock or panic. All three probably. 

You weren’t ready to have a baby, surely? Yes, you and Yoongi spoke about it from time to time, but it was mostly done in jest. You loved one another but that didn’t mean you were all set to have a baby. You’d been together 4 years, living together for just over one. What would he say? What would you even tell him?! 

You spent the rest of the day numb. Curled up on the sofa, the television playing to itself. You wanted to call your mom, you wanted to tell Seulgi, but you knew Yoongi should be the first to know. So alone, your thoughts orbited around all your anxieties. 

Hearing his keys in the front door, a fresh wave of nausea turned your gut. You heard him in the entry way, kicking his shoes off, his keys landing in the bowl on the little side table you’d both picked out. You’d made a home for yourselves so easily, the thought comforted you for a quick second, but then you saw his face come into view, stood in the doorway. 

“Hey,” he greeted softly, a puzzled look on his face. “I thought you were at work.” 

“I called out.” Your voice was hoarse, you hadn’t used it in a few hours. 

As you cleared your throat, Yoongi’s frown deepened. “Are you still feeling sick?” He rushed over, taking a seat next to you, an arm wrapping around your shoulders. 

You leaned your head against him, letting your eyes flutter closed. Comforted by his warmth, his smell. Maybe this whole thing wasn’t so bad. You were in this with the man you trusted most in this world. The man you loved so fricking much. He loved you too. Always had. 

“It was that steak from Bruno’s, I’m telling you.” He was adamant, stroking a hand through your hair, fingers combing through the tangles. You’d been so out of it today you hadn’t even brushed it. “We should call them up, get our money back.” 

You pressed your face into his warmth, taking one last moment for yourself before you moved, left him, creating a distance between your bodies. “It wasn’t the steak.” 

You could hear the concern in his voice when he said your name. “What’s wrong?”

You shoved a hand in your hoody pocket, fist clenching around a stick of plastic, psyching yourself up. Beside you, Yoongi rubbed your back, getting more and more worried. He chuckled awkwardly. “Come on, babe, you’re scaring me.” 

You didn’t want to scare him. You found your voice, removing the test from your pocket as you spoke. “I’m feeling sick because I’m pregnant.” 

Saying the words out loud for the first time felt weird. Yoongi stiffened up beside you, eyes wide as he stared at the test in your hand. Hesitantly he took it from you, bringing it closer. You didn’t miss the way his fingers trembled. 

“What are we going to do, Yoongi?” Your voice was a whisper. “I don’t understand how it happened. We always use protection.” 

You didn’t think he heard you, still staring at the stick. “You’re pregnant?” You nodded as he finally tore his eyes away and looked at you. You watched the beginnings of smile twitch at his mouth. “We’re going to have a baby?” 

For a moment your chest felt lighter. “If you want to,” you heard yourself say. 

This time he broke out into gummy grin. Despite still looking and sounding dazed, he seemed...happy? Excited? “Of course I want to!” He exclaimed, in his own little world as he stared at the test again. 

He was holding it in both hands now, as if it was the most interesting thing in the world. “You’re pregnant,” he pretty much awed. Your heart swelled. After feeling heavy all day it was  a very much welcomed improvement. 

“Wait–” He turned his head, suddenly realising something. “Do you want to?” Your earlier behaviour had only just dawned on him, now his forehead creased with fresh concern. 

“I’m in shock.” You answered honestly. “We didn’t plan for it. I thought maybe you’d...” You petered out. Why had you been so worried to tell him again? Taking his arm, you smiled. It felt like a weight had been lifted from your shoulders. “I want to too.” 

Suddenly you found yourself embraced in his warmth, a bear hug of sorts, Yoongi’s arms squeezing you tight. You felt his lips at your crown and closed your eyes, gripping his sweatshirt, safe and sound. 

“Shit. We’re having a baby?!” He laughed in amazement, over your shoulder. He was still clutching the test. 

“I’m fairly certain.” You chuckled, a hand rooting around inside your hoody again. “I took three tests.” In a bid to be sure, you’d driven to a drugstore ten minutes away. All three had given you the same result. You were definitely pregnant. 

Yoongi broke away, laughing at what he’d just heard, eager to see the evidence. He held them all, gazing at each line and cross and even the word ‘pregnant’ in small black font. “Fuck. How did you piss so much?” 

The laughter bubbled from your throat. Of course it did. He had that ability. No matter the situation he could always get you laughing. You were even more thankful in this moment. 

“Anxiety.” (Although, you had read it was an early symptom of pregnancy too – peeing a lot.) 

Despite your laughter, a couple of tears trickled down your cheeks. Yoongi caught them immediately. “Hey, don’t cry,” he murmured, dropping the tests in his lap to reach for your face and kiss them away. 

“They’re not sad tears,” you reassured. You hadn’t cried all day but seeing Yoongi so happy was what got you in the end. 

His eyes were still filled with concern though, pushing the hair out of your face, searching for something in your eyes.. “Were you worried about telling me?” 

“I don’t know why,” you confirmed. It seemed silly now. All your worries seemed pointless. Why had you been so scared at the prospect of raising a child? Of course you could do it. Especially with Yoongi at your side. 

Yoongi understood you. He rubbed your upper back. “I know it’s a shock but it’s not the end of the world.” You smiled thankfully, letting his words soothe you. “In fact, you could say it’s the beginning of the world.” His happy little grin got you, giggling at his lame ass line. 

He leaned in, rubbing his nose with yours. “Our world.” You cupped his face as he pressed a kiss to your mouth, letting your eyes close briefly before he pulled away. “I love you,” he sang softly. 

His eyes were twinkling, the happiness he felt obvious. “I love you too,” you sang right back. 

Chuckling under his breath he was still amazed. “We made a baby.” 

Running your fingers through his dark hair, you grinned and confirmed. “We made a baby.”

#fic:pbn #yoongi fanfic #bts fanfic #floralseokjin:writings

[sweeethinny]

Abstinence (M)

Summary: ''I told you, I don't know how to live without you anymore, it's like you're my drug and I'm an addict.”

"What a bad comparison." They laughed, Harry hugging her tighter. Ginny rested her head close to his collarbone, feeling entirely happy. She was so happy he was home.

"I know." Harry kissed her head. "But that's how I feel."

or

Harry and Ginny haven't had much time alone, until after being gone for three days, Harry comes back feeling abstinent from his favorite drug.

Notes: I wrote this for @blvnk-art's Smut Hinny Sundays, and hope you all like it I wasn't inspired by a specific art of hers, but by several I was also inspired by the song All The Time - Jeremih

AO3

-----

Ginny sighed as she got home, taking off her cloak and shoes, her feet tired after all those hours of practice, her arms sore too. Gwenog seemed to want to kill her now that she was back.

It was great to be back, Ginny was glad she had made that decision six months ago, but her body still wasn't used to all that burden of being a mother and playing Quidditch, and strength training was always the worst, leaving her more tired than usual and with even more pain in her arms.

At least, Ginny thought, Harry was staying at home more, which helped her not to spend all the hours she was away worrying about James and whether he was okay. The boy was staying part-time in day care - in the afternoon - and so far they hadn't had a problem with anything, James even seemed happier now that he was with other kids.

"Babe?" Ginny called, walking past their house which was silent, which was weird since James didn't seem to be a big fan of silence. But Harry didn't show up anywhere, all the lights in there were off, which Ginny assumed was because he'd already put James to sleep and was upstairs.

She was happy, thinking that maybe she could get a massage that night—or even something more.

Walking slowly up the stairs, afraid to make a noise, she arrived in front of James' room, smiling when she saw that Harry was sleeping sitting in the rocking chair, the little one lying on his arm, sleeping clutching his shirt. It was such a cute scene that Ginny thought her heart might melt, still unaccustomed, even after almost two years, to how Harry was such a lovely father.

He had become another man now that they had James, Harry was much more careful at work, and much more affectionate. Not that he hadn't gone before, but it looked like James had freed him from the fear of showing. Harry cried more easily, wasn't afraid to play and do childish things with Teddy and James, and let them teach him everything he didn't know. Like last week James had made Harry realize he needed to eat more slowly— "Swow, Daddy," James had said, and now he seemed a lot less anxious and rushed into eating.

Even more careful now not to wake her son, Ginny approached the chair, kissing Harry's forehead and shaking him slowly, just so he woke up and put James in his crib so they could go to bed together.

"Hi," Harry whispered, a faint smile on his lips. His face was a little scrunched up from the pillows, his cheeks red with heat, probably because he had lit the fireplace in the living room.

"Hi." Ginny gave him a quick peck. “Shall we go to bed?” She ran a hand over his face, pushing his hair out of his eyes and straightening his crooked glasses. He nodded, taking a deep breath and stretching his legs, looking at James who didn't move in his arms.

"He didn't want to leave me today." Harry stood up, looking worried as he laid his son on his own bed, but as always after he fell asleep, James made no sign that he was going to wake up. Little hands ran to grab the yellow blanket Hermione had given him, and Ginny covered him with the other blanket, not wanting him to be cold at night. She kissed his forehead and lifted the crib enclosure, thinking that soon that wouldn't be enough to stop James from getting out of bed.

'You were gone for three days, he missed you' Ginny reminded him, hugging Harry and resting her head on his chest, letting him drag her towards their bedroom, feeling finally at home now that he was there.

Harry had gone away to a conference in Spain, and it had been a long three lonely days where she had the bed all to herself - sometimes James would cry to stay with her through the night, seeming to realize that things weren't the same without his daddy there.

"I missed you guys too." Harry kissed her head. 'I need to take a shower.'

"Me too, Gwenog today seemed to want to kill us in practice, I even thought maybe she was punishing us for something... You know, she's crazy sometimes."

'I know. Robards was about to lose his hair at the conference, telling everyone he would go crazy if he heard one more lecture.” Harry went into their bathroom, turning on the shower and starting to undress. Ginny had missed that routine and intimacy.

She took off her clothes too, tossing them in the laundry hamper, their cold room making her skin crawl. "We have a party to go to on Saturday."

"A party?" Harry grimaced, stepping under the shower.

‘Yes, I promised we would. Sorry, there was no other way out.' She followed, re-embracing Harry and resting her head on his now bare chest, the water splashing between them, relaxing her muscles. "It's a fundraiser for an orphaned children's charity… It'll be quick, we'll stay for an hour or two, then we'll go back." She promised, giving him what she hoped was her best look. Harry sighed and nodded, tightening his arms around her, pulling their bodies closer together.

‘Okay, we will. But two hours at most.” Ginny nodded, standing up on her tiptoes to kiss him.

"I missed you so much," she whispered, lifting her hands to cup his face, pulling him into a deeper kiss, never wanting to let go. Harry squeezed her hips, letting her feel his cock that was beginning to show signs of life.

The kiss started to get hotter faster than she expected, soon Harry had picked her up and pushed her against the cold wall, squeezing her waist tighter and thrusting his tongue deeper into her mouth, as if suddenly a key had turned inside him and Harry had been as hungry as she was.

Ginny pulled at his hair, moaning into his mouth and scratching at his scalp trying to make him as crazy as he was leaving her, his teeth playing with her lip and his hands going down to her ass and squeezing.

“Fuck, I missed this.” Harry moaned as she tightened her legs around him, her wet intimacy touching his already hard cock.

They hadn't had a lot of time to get laid now that James was older, the boy seemed to have the right timing to want his parents whenever they were too close to each other, either to pee or because he was bored and hunger. Ginny had already accepted that by the weekend they would be too tired to do anything but sleep, and that getting laid would have to be for weekdays, during the morning shower, a quickie before James woke up.

"Me too." Ginny thought she might lose her mind at any moment, almost screaming when his trained fingers touched her swollen clit, throwing her head back and biting her lip to keep the noises back.

"The last few days I felt like a fucking teenager thinking about you." Harry whispered in her ear, his thick voice making her moan. “Thinking of you on top of me, below, on the side, on all fours…” He continued, biting the sensitive skin of her neck. "As much as I love getting laid in the shower, I miss a bed."

"Yes, shit, Harry yes." Ginny would agree to flee this planet right now if he continued to touch her like that.

She didn't pay much attention to the next few minutes between him turning off the shower, applying a basic dry spell on their bodies, and walking into their bedroom, waking up only when Harry threw her onto the bed, looking like a hungry animal climbing on top of her, his mouth traveling all over her body, sucking and biting the inside of her thighs until it reached the top and licked her clit. All the tension from practice, the daily worries, everything, was gone when his mouth touched her there and did all those wonders to her.

Ginny still remembered the first time Harry had done that to her, that hot, muggy summer after the war, one sunny afternoon when Harry had taken her to her room, all nervous and anxious, saying he wanted to try something new. It was good, confusing, but good. But now, Merlin, now it was perfect. There were no toys that came close to what he did, all that erotic dance with his tongue, taking her to the peak and making her enjoy the delicious fall more and more.

Her throat went dry, her scream scratching as Harry sucked on her clit, his arms holding Ginny firmly in place, preventing her from moving any further.

She saw stars, can't wait any longer, thighs trembling as she began to come, trying not to scream too loudly so that nothing could stand in the way of them both.

"I feel like a new man," Harry said, wiping his beard and moving up to be level with her face, a naughty grin plastered across his face. "Making you come is the best thing in the world." He kissed her, but Ginny was still too much in the clouds to reciprocate in a very excited way, her body looking like jelly on the bed.

"I wish I could suck you back babe, but I miss you inside of me." Ginny muttered, biting his lower lip and moving down to kiss his jaw and neck.

'I don't care too much about it, I want to be inside you too soon' Harry moaned as she spun them around, taking advantage of the fact that he was too focused on her mouth on his neck, and Ginny snuggled into his lap, jerking him a little to buy time for herr body to be ready again. “Fuck, you're going to kill me.” His green eyes darkened, rolling in their sockets.

"Don't die before you fuck me." Ginny chuckled as he moaned once more, her hand tightening a little more at the base of his dick as Harry liked, already sensing she was almost ready.

"No, not in a million years." He arched his back, biting his lip and seeming to try hard not to get carried away before they even started. "I feel like an abstinence junkie."

"I'm glad my pussy has that effect on you." She blinked at him who admired her as if Ginny were a Goddess. She felt so desired when he looked at her like that.

She couldn't take it anymore, she lifted her hips, adjusting to take him inside her, moaning in satisfaction at the feel of Harry opening her, needing to lean against his chest so she wouldn't fall once she was fully seated. That was one of her favorite positions, he touched her in that delicious spot that made Ginny lose consciousness and be taken by fire.

"Fuck." Harry squeezed her hips to keep her from moving, closing his eyes as if in pain, his back arching on the bed. 'Fuck, you feel so good.' Ginny tensed her muscles as she'd learned in that magazine she read in her gynecologist's office, and Harry seemed to lose whatever sanity was left in him, moaning loudly and still clenching his hands, almost to the point of hurting her.

"Like it?" she asked, a satisfied smirk on her face, even though it had taken her out of her orbit as well. Harry nodded, finally letting her move.

"So good," he muttered, finally opening his eyes and staring at her, the green iris making her blush. His hands moved from her hips to her breasts, pinching and massaging her sensitive nipples, and Ginny nearly lost her rhythm and fell on top of Harry with the teasing.

Neither of them could say much more, Ginny quickened her movement, interspersed with the contractions that made her and Harry moan and lose their minds more and more, each time feeling closer to coming again. His trained hands roamed her body, to her nipples, and then to her sensitive clit, playing just enough to make her feel pleasure and not pain.

Ginny thought she would go crazy if she didn't come soon.

Harry looked the same, because suddenly he couldn't wait any longer, squeezing her hips and lifting his, rushing his thrusts and fucking her as if it made him come alive. She didn't care too much, because she felt the same way.

It wasn't long before they both came, Ginny bent down and captured Harry's lips before he made too much noise and woke James, kissing him to keep himself sane, her nails firmly on his shoulders as that electric shock took over her body, the ripples making her lose control.

"I love you," she whispered, feeling Harry pull out of her and his cum trickle out. They would deal with that mess in a little while, Ginny needed to breathe first.

"Me too." Harry looked the same mess as her, body sweaty and arms trembling, he smiled at her. ‘I'm glad to be home again, not having you to sleep at night is unbearable.’

"Just to sleep?" Ginny joked, looking at him like he was still that 16 year old boy she was madly in love with, feeling a lot of new things and not being able to go to sleep without smiling.

'For everything. I told you, I don't know how to live without you anymore, it's like you're my drug and I'm an addict.”

"What a bad comparison." They laughed, Harry hugging her tighter. Ginny rested her head close to his collarbone, feeling entirely happy. She was so happy he was home.

"I know." Harry kissed her head. "But that's how I feel."

#smuthinnysundays #hinny #harry x ginny #harry and ginny #hinny headcanon #my fic

[colormeyondublue]

Chapter 10: The Observation Deck

Chapter 9 Here - Chapter 11 Here

***CONTENT WARNING: This chapter contains moments of attempted rape, sexual harassment, violence and homicide. Continue with caution!***

You wake up and it’s still really dark in the room. Yondu isn’t up yet either, and you glance over at your wrist comm on the table near the bed. Great, it’s the middle of third shift. You’ve learned that time on the ship is split into three equal parts: first, second, and third shift. First shift is equivalent to the morning time back on earth, second is like the afternoon, and third would be overnight. Each shift has watchmen placed all over the ship, but whoever is watching the helm is the most important. They keep the ship on course, and from crashing into something. 

Your recollection of how each shift works is disrupted by your serious need to pee. Oh, right, that’s why I woke up in the first place. You quietly get up and look back to make sure Yondu is still asleep. Surprisingly, he is. You make your way to the bathroom and quietly close the door. After using the bathroom, you gasp. “Holy crap, Yondu.” You mutter to yourself. Whether it’s just Yondu, or maybe it’s Centuarians in general that cum this much, but there is a lot to clean up. Human men are one thing, but Yondu has made you a whole other level of messy. The last thing I need out in space is a UTI... On one hand, this is a little annoying. On the other hand, it’s kind of a turn on. You make sure to get yourself taken care of before heading back to bed. Pulling up the covers, you lay back in bed with this curious blue man. He’s turned on his side, facing you. His mouth is partly open, breathing lightly. He looks so peaceful, so relaxed. His features, although weathered, are perfection. The lines around his eyes, the scruff on his face, the dark blue shade of his eyelashes. How could one alien be so enticing? You reach out to gently stroke the scruff on his cheek, and he just barely stirs. A soft grunt vibrates from his chest and a tiny smile pulls at his mouth. You chuckle to yourself and whisper. “I’ve fallen hard for you, Yondu. You know that?”

“I sure did, sugar.” He says quietly without opening his eyes.

“Oh my gosh! I had no idea you were awake! Did wake you?”

“Yeah, but it’s alright. I like when ya touch ma face like that. Ain’t nobody ever done it before. Feels nice.”

“Well, if you like that, I have lots more to show you.” You laugh and kiss his cheek.

“I’ll hold ya to it.”

Yondu pulls you roughly into his arms and holds you tight against his chest, and you both fall back asleep.

~~~

You wake up again later during first shift, and there is a soft glow of light in the room. Yondu is gone, and as you sit up to stretch, you see a cup of juice and a chocolate chip muffin on the night stand.

“Awe, he remembered.” You smile, sip your juice and take a bite of the muffin. You begin to get dressed for the day, smile warmly at your silver bracelet, and head out of Yondu’s quarters toward your office. The walkways of the Eclector are pretty quiet, but you remember that this is the day most of the crew are headed off ship for Knowhere. You reach your office, and find Yondu is there waiting for you.

“Good morning! Hey, thanks for breakfast. You remembered my favorite!” You say happily as you unlock the door and head inside. Yondu follows you in and closes the door behind you both.

“Ah, it was nothin’. But hey, today me and a couple a’ the boys are headed out to sell our take from Jophar and some a’ them minerals we picked up on our last stop. We’s on a place called Knowhere. Ya ever heard of it?”

“I’ve heard it mentioned in passing conversation, but I don’t know much else. Why?”

“Well…Knowhere…it ain’t a place fer Terrans.” He says halfheartedly.

“What do you mean ‘ain’t a place for Terrans’?”

“I don’t mean anything bad about you, honey. You know I care about ya and I think the universe of ya. See, what happens on my ship I can control.” He gestures to himself, and then points toward the door as he continues to his point. “What happens on Knowhere I can’t control. There ain’t no laws, no mandates, no nothin’. You could get picked up by anybody and disappear. Knowhere is an ancient, decaying, celestial head, and I can only protect ya so much out here. My plan is to just get this deal done and get outta here.”

You pace the room and sigh. “Honestly, I’m fine with that. The last thing I want is to wind up in the same situation I was in before I managed to escape that slave ship on Krylor. I trust you, and I’ll stay here.”

“Oh, thank the stars!” He exclaims as he pulls you into an embrace. “I thought you were gonna be ticked that you couldn’t come with me.”

“Well, sure, I wanna see as many places as I can…but you’re the Captain of this Ravager clan, and you have a job to do. I’m not gonna get in the way of that.” You kiss him on his cheek as your hand wanders through the scruff on his face. “I love you. That means I love this ship, and I love that you’re the captain too…thief, Ravager and all.” You warmly smile up at him, completely oblivious to what you just said.

Yondu’s face grows still. He is bewildered and a little shocked, and he just stares at you.

“What? What’s wrong? Did I say something wrong?” Worried, you take a step back and grasp his hands.

“Ya…ya just said ya loved me.”

“Oh. Oh, my god I…” You back up toward the door, breathing heavily. Your eyes search Yondu’s face for any sign of calm. There is none to be found. You both panic in silence for a few moments and your mind races.

Shit shit shit! This isn’t how I wanted this to go. It just slipped out! I have no idea if he feels the same way. What if I just scared him off?! FUCK!

Totally freaked out, you make your way for the door. As you turn the handle you hear Yondu behind you call your name.

“Y/n! Wait a minute!”

Your heart is racing, vision blurred, ears ringing. You run down the hallway as fast as your feet can take you. Yondu follows you part of the way, and slows to a stop. Chasing after you won’t help. He’s got a deal to finish, and you need time to calm down. He looks down at his boots and shakes his head. She loves me? No one has ever truly loved me before...I think. I ain’t even sure what love is supposed to feel like. Is this it? Sure, Peter cares. Kraglin cares. Maybe Aleta and Stakar cared at some point. But love? A Ravager ain’t supposed to love anybody. This is all just business right? A means to an end. On one hand, Stakar and Aleta were a thing right? Were they in love? Quill has that green girl…Gamora? Is that love? He snaps his head up at the realization. Quill! That’s it! I can call him when we leave! He’s Terran…he should know what this love thing is.

At that moment, Kraglin approached. “Ya ready Cap’n?”

“Yeah, boy, let’s get this done.”

~~~

You finally make it up to the observation deck. Your throat is on fire, your mouth is dry, and tears are threatening to fall. You collapse on the floor in a pathetic heap. After you catch your breath, you stand up and make your way over to the window. Looking out, you can see the giant skull floating in place. The Warbird is heading that direction and a few other M-Ships follow after.

“Stay safe.” You whisper to yourself.

You sit cross legged on the floor of the observation deck, staring out the window. The stars flicker in the distance. You’ve been lost in thought, and it feels like hours have gone by since you first saw the M-Ships depart.

“I hope they’ll be back soon.” You mutter under your breath.

“I don’t.” A chilling voice comes from behind you, making you jump and turn to see where the voice came from.

“Trenvik! You scared me! I thought you went with everyone else?”

“No, I stayed behind. There is nothing there I want anyway.” He moves closer to you, and you jump to your feet. He positions himself between you and the door. “Now, what is the Captain’s pet doing here all alone?”

“Nothing. I was just enjoying the view and waiting for them to come back. The Captain thought there was no reason for me to go, so I stayed here.”

“The Captain is a smart man, yes? We wouldn’t want our girl getting hurt or kidnapped, would we?”

“Excuse me? Our girl?” You retort.

“Yes, our girl. You belong to the ship, the crew. As far as I am concerned you do not belong to the Captain alone. He is selfish for trying to keep you to himself. The rest of us have needs just as well as he does.” Trenvik eyes you over with a disgusting smile on his face.

“I don’t give a damn about your needs. I belong to the Captain, no one else.”

“I see why he likes you. You have a fire in you. But that does not change the fact that you made me look like a fool.” Trenvik continues to inch closer to you.

“What?! How exactly did I do that?” You yell at him. You search for some way around him, but what he does next catches you off guard.

He charges toward you and slams you against the cold, metal wall behind you. He pushes one arm to your throat, while two hands pin your wrists to the wall. “You led me on! You made me believe that you wanted me, and then came out and made me a liar by confessing your affiliation with the Captain!”

“Led you on?! Trenvik, we’ve barely said a word to each other! You’re insane! Let me go!”

“I…am not...insane. You stupid bitch.” He slaps you in the face, and throws you to the floor. He quickly climbs on top of you and uses all four arms to pin you down. His grip is like steel, you can’t budge an inch. You begin to panic, and beg for your life.

“Trenvik, please, don’t do this!”

He laughs darkly, and slowly grinds his hips against yours. “I’m going to take what’s mine.”

You whimper and begin to cry. “Stop! Please, Stop! Don’t do this to me!”

None of your pleas are working. He reaches down with one hand to undo his pants, and you scream at the top of your lungs. He frees up another one of his hands, and begins to stroke the inside of your thigh.

“You’ll enjoy this, I can promise you that. The Captain will just be an after thought when I’m finished with you.”

“Help me! Somebody please! Help!! No, Stop! Leave me alone!”

Just as it seems like no help is coming, the door to the observation deck flies open. It’s Yondu. Trenvik jumps to his feet, dragging you with him. He pulls out a knife and holds it at your side. The point tearing through your leathers, threatening to pierce your skin.

“Let ‘er go. Now!” Yondu’s voice is even more menacing that you’ve heard before. From what you can see, Kraglin and Oblo are Standing behind him.

“Now, Captain, no need to be rash. I’m just taking what I deserve. This girl belongs to the crew. Last I checked, I’m part of the crew.” Trenvik says.

“Not anymore ya ain’t.” A shrill whistle rings through the air, and you can see Yondu’s arrow appear just a few feet from Tenvik’s face. “Let ‘er go now, and you can leave this ship with yer life.”

“HA! Just as we all thought. The Captain’s gone soft. All for some stupid Terran bitch. You don’t have it in you anymore. You’re just a weak minded –“  Trenvik’s voice was cut off by another sharp whistle. The knife moves away from your body, and you hear a thud behind you. Yondu sent his arrow straight through Trenvik’s skull. You clap a hand over your mouth to stifle more cries. Yondu walks briskly toward you and you run to meet him. He takes you in his arms and holds you tightly.

“Shh..honey it’s alright. Yer safe, yer safe. Kraglin! Oblo! Get this asshole outta here. Gather the crew in the mess, pronto. I wanna make an example of this piece of shit.”

“Yessir. Right away.” Kraglin replies. The two of them pick up each end of Trenvik’s body and haul him out of the room.

“Baby, look at me. Hey, are you alright?” Yondu’s voice becomes much softer. His eyes are so worried, but beautiful. They remind you of the red giants they used to talk about at the planetarium back home. That shade of red is so warm, and calming.

“Yeah… I think so. I think I’m okay.” You manage to get out.

“He didn’t hurt ya did he? Did he touch ya?”

“A little. He was going to do worse, but you got here just in time. How did you know where to find me?” You ask.

“Well, you was runnin’ in this direction earlier. What really got my attention was I could hear you yellin’ at someone through the ventilation system when I was headed toward yer office after we got back in.”

“Oh.”

“It doesn’t matter now sweetheart, yer safe. He’s gone now, he can’t ever hurt ya again. Damn it, I should’a known that low life was up ta somethin’.”

“No! Don’t do that. There was no way you could have known. I had no idea he would do something like this either.” You say.

“Y/n, ya even said the other day that he was givin’ ya weird feelin’s. I should’a listened. I should’a done somethin’ about it then.” Yondu argues.

“Well, it’s over. I’m okay. You’re here now, and I’m okay.”

Yondu holds you closer and lets out a long sigh. “I’m sorry this happened.”

“I am too, but it’s done. You know what I want now?” You ask.

“What’s that darlin’?”

“Go make an example of that asshole.”

A big, spiteful grin grows on his lips. “With pleasure honey, with pleasure.”

~~~

Yondu walks you back to his quarters. His hand never leaves your back, and he’s sure to get you there quickly. He ushers you into the room and looks you over again, as if he missed something.

“Are ya sure yer alright?”

“Yes, I’m okay. Honestly, I just want to shower and catch up on some data entry I meant to get done today.”

“Okay. I can get ya connected to yer server through one of my holopads if ya want ta stay in here?”

“That sounds great. I would love that. I really don’t want to be around anyone right now.” You begin to undress. You look regretfully at the cut in your leathers and tears begin to well in your eyes again.

“Hey now, don’t you worry about that. Geff is really good at fixin’ stuff like this. I’ll make sure he gets these and he can make ‘em good as new. Why don’t ya get in the shower and relax a little. I’ll get ya set up in here, and you can get yer mind off all this. Alright?” Yondu places a hand on your shoulder to reassure you.

“Yeah, thank you. For everything.” You pull Yondu in for a kiss, and you head for the shower.

The hot water feels amazing on your body. The steam clears your mind and allows your stress to melt away. You think about what happened on the observation deck. You aren’t sure when you’ll really be okay, but you know that Trenvik is dead, and you’re safe. When you finish in the shower, you emerge from the bathroom to find Yondu has already gone to the mess to address the crew about Trenvik’s death. You see that he set out one of his under shirts and a pair of leisure pants to relax in. You find the holopad he set up for you on his desk, and you get to work.

~~~

Yondu enters the mess, with a serious scowl on his face. He is relived that you’re safe, but this is a perfect opportunity to rip into his crew. Sure, he may be soft for you, but that means he would kill to keep you safe. He makes his way to the front of the room, and murmurs are floating around of someone’s death. He lets out a sharp whistle to get everyone’s attention, and his arrow zips around the room before coming back to his fist.

“Listen up! There’s been some happenin's on this ship that I need to clarify. Seems like our little conversation regarding y/n bein' my girl wasn’t clear enough fer some of ya!”

Kraglin and Oblo drag Trenvik’s body out into the open for the entire crew to see. There are more quiet murmurs throughout the room.

“This worthless pile a’ shit thought he’d go ahead and try somethin’ stupid with my girl. Ya’ll can see where that got him. Now, I’m gonna make myself perfectly clear: If anyone lays a hand, claw, or paw on y/n, you will be shot! Trenvik is a perfect example of what happens when ya do not obey my orders! Does that make sense, ya buncha’ worthless space rats?!”

“Yes sir!” rings through the mess.

“Good. I will not be havin’ this conversation with ya’ll again. Now git the hell outta my sight!” Yondu turns to Kraglin, and looks over Trenvik’s body one last time. “Krags, throw that corpse out the air lock. We’re finished here.”

#Yondu and The Secretary #yondu x reader #Yondu Udonta #gotg fanfiction #ravager #gotg #Yondu #content warning

[storiesofsvu]

Little One Ch 8

Warnings: Language, minor political crap, teensey bit of angst, fluff otherwise. A/N: Here we are! I thought I had one more chapter to go, but I didn’t actually write down the notes I thought I had like an idiot, SO, I didn’t have enough to flesh out two full chapters without like, completely copying scenes from the show and that...is an issue...SO, you get a bit of a mix & match chapter that is this!

Elizabeth was the first to hear the incessant knocking on the main door of the residence. Not sure what exactly was going on, and with you dead asleep in her arms, she wanted to keep you that way, swiftly slipping from under the covers. Making sure to close the door behind herself, she was ever thankful the two of you had redressed after your afternoon sessions.

Despite her attempts, you were roused from your slumber only a few minutes later to the sound of somewhat hushed yelling. You were still half asleep, but the bed was empty and that somewhat worried you considering the time.

“What’s’going on?” You mumbled, rubbing sleep out of your eyes as you realized it was David and Elizabeth. Her head shot up to you,

“Go back to bed little one.”

“But”- David’s voice cut you off first, the pet name catching his attention.

“I thought you were home sick yesterday?”

“There’s like thirty bedrooms here David, chill.” You mumbled back, fighting the urge to curl into Elizabeth’s side.

“And you just came out of the master?”

“Yeah they’re connected by the bathroom. I got up to pee, heard voices.” His eyes darted between the two of you, brows furrowing even more as he really looked at you.

“And I suppose you’re just sharing a set of pyjamas for convenience’s sake?”

You and Elizabeth glanced between each other, after the afternoon you’d had, she’d pulled out a set, knowing that you liked to wear the top half with your shorts. It helped the two of you feel closer together, like you really had each other when you were feeling down. All things considered, you’d both forgotten. Her eyes widened at the purple mark on your neck that seemed to be getting both bigger and darker by the minute.

“David…” She warned.

“Oh come on!” You cut in, “she’s not the one fucking a Russian operative!” David waffled and Elizabeth couldn’t help but chuckle, you were awake now, that was for sure. “So what the fuck are you doing here at four in the morning?” Elizabeth answered for him.

“The Russians appear to be fighting each other.” She shrugged, giving you a knowing glance.

“Oh don’t bullshit me Elizabeth!” He shot back, quickly moving to the sitting area, flicking on the t.v to the riot currently going on “it’s Saul Berenson! What the hell is he even doing over there? Why wasn’t I briefed on this!?”

“Maybe because the girl you were fucking is the reason he’s over there.” You glared, turning your back on the two of them, “I’ll put the coffee on.”

“She knew about this!?” He turned to Elizabeth.

“She’s my head P.R, we had to keep her in front of this and on the down low.”

“Is it that? Or is just because she’s your girlfriend?”

“God I miss Rob…” Elizabeth chuckled at your muttering from the kitchen, but shot David a glare heavy enough that he dropped the subject.

As it turned out, the extradition of Simone Martin ended up (mainly) successful, your little pre-dawn conference was interrupted when David was called to the Oval by the VP, and honestly you were thankful for it. Now it was just a waiting game to see if she would testify as you wanted, or end up perjuring herself instead.

Elizabeth urged you back to bed, knowing how much you hated your sleep being interrupted (and knowing she was about to need you in prime shape ready to write). She returned a few hours later just after noon to wake you, pausing to perch on the edge of the bed. She stroked the hair off your face as you lay curled under the duvet, caressing at your cheek gently. The bruise on your neck was already about three shades darker than when David had shown up, she grimaced at the sight, hoping it wasn’t hurting you, and hoping that you had enough clothes to cover it for a few days. You looked so peaceful and rested she hated to wake you, wanting to leave you in dreamland for a little while longer. She always adored when you wore one of her pyjama tops, but this colour especially matched your skin tone so incredible well (and when you were awake, brought out your eyes like she couldn’t believe).

“Little one…” she gently stroked at your hair. You grumbled slightly, pulling the blanket tighter around yourself and she chuckled. “Come on sweetheart, I made lunch.”

“Mmm..” you mumbled, rolling to stretch out your body as you looked up at her with a smile, “did you get any more sleep?”

“A little.” Leaning over you she pressed a soft kiss to your forehead, “but enough.”

“Coulda fooled me.” You teased, “you look tired.”

“Yeah while political hijacking will do that to you.”

You laughed, moving to sit up, kissing her softly, murmuring against her lips.

“Still look absolutely beautiful though.” She laughed softly, kissing you quickly before tugging you from the bed.

You ate curled up on the couch together, watching the panicked news while tossing ideas and theories back and fourth. David once again interrupted your day, though this time you didn’t shy away from each other as much as you normally would, your secret was out to him at least, Elizabeth wasn’t about to let a moment go to waste. He gave you the update that they’d gotten Simone out of the country and back onto a plane, and left shortly there after, having about a million other things to do back at the office, giving you the privacy you wanted.

“Well…congratulations.” You smiled, settling into Elizabeth’s lap on the couch, arms dangling over her shoulders as you kissed her.

“It’s still early for that little one.” She tsk’d, kissing your nose gently, “she’s still got to get on the ground, to the trial and actually testify.”

“You really think after all of that she won’t tell the truth?”

“At this point I’m not even sure what to think anymore.”

“Well I can tell you one thing.”

“Hm?”

“Even it wasn’t a full term you made one hell of an incredible president. You went through more crap in the year you were in office than some presidents do in eight. And you did it with grace, held your head high even when you were being attacked. In more than one sense of the word.”

“You’re just saying that because you love me.” She teased and you laughed.

“Maybe. But being said out of love doesn’t make it any less true Elizabeth.” She hummed in response as you kissed her again, lips moving lazily against each other, relishing in these very likely last few moments of no politics.

As the afternoon progressed, you watched the trial, a note pad at your side for anything you might want or need to use later on in a statement. Elizabeth got a call halfway through, shifting back to the bedroom, when she came back, she was fully dressed.

“Goin’ somewhere?” You half teased, barely glancing up from your paper.

“I’m meeting up with Saul.” She ducked over the back of the couch, kissing the top of your head, “I want to meet the team that did this.”

“Course you do.” You smiled up at her, accepting the gentle kiss on your lips.

“You’re more than welcome to come.”

“It’s fine.” You waved her off, “I’ve got one hell of a speech to get started on.”

“Alright.” Her hand cupped your cheek in her palm, leaning over to kiss you once again, “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Giving her arm a quick squeeze you sent her off with a smile, “stay safe.”

“I will.”

*

The next morning Elizabeth awoke at first with a weary sigh, wanting to pull you into her arms, hold you there for as long as she could. Apparently though, you had other plans, she could hear the quiet clinking in the kitchen as well as the sound of your heels pattering through the residence, your hushed voice as she assumed you were on the phone.

When you heard the bedroom door open your head shot out from the kitchen counter where you were putting final touches on breakfast, a pout on your cheeks.

“You’re not supposed to be up yet.”

“Kinda hard with you clattering around out here.”

“Sorry.” You pouted again, crossing the room to her, pulling her into a tight hug, letting her sink into her arms. “You okay today?”

“It never gets easier.” She breathed out softly and you gave her a tight squeeze. She was always affected so heavily by the anniversary of Andrew’s death, and you absolutely hated that you had to leave her for your more than jam packed morning.

“I’m so sorry.” You pulled away an inch, able to cup her cheeks in your palms, thumbs soothing across her skin. She huffed out a breath, leaning her forehead on yours for a moment, just taking her time, knowing you were about to dart off.

“Thank you.” She kissed you softly, thankful for the warmth of your body against her skin.

“I made that banana cream cheese stuffed French toast you like so much. I was gonna bring it to you in bed.”

“I can eat it out here. Thank you.” She squeezed at your hand, “I take it you have to go?”

“Yeah. I’ve got about a million things to do.” You slid her a mug of coffee, “there’s two options for your speech on the table, I sent David to get the wreath, he’ll be here at ten to take you to the fields, then back to the Oval to be re-sworn. Immediately following you have a meeting with him and Warner….Paley wants to see you, so good luck with that one.”

“Any time for a break before the statement tonight?”

“Depends on how long those meetings take, but I’d say you’ll have time for a break before dinner, a couple glasses of wine before the appearance.” You kissed her chastely as your phone beeped, “oh, and I stole one of your shirts for…reasons.” You flushed, thankful that the giant hickey on your neck was covered, Elizabeth laughed quietly.

“You’re busy, go.”

“I’m sorry I can’t be there this morning. I’ll see you in the Oval. I love you.”

“I love you too little one, now go before you’re late.”

You gave her a soft look, scooping up the pile of paperwork and folders before darting from the residence.

*

You finally toppled into the residence at nearly seven that evening, not surprised to find Elizabeth at the island, tumbler of whiskey in front of her. Your heart sunk at the slight red rim to her eyes, despite regaining her presidency, it was safe to say today was a tough day.

“Hey…sorry that took so long.” You greeted softly, wrapping your arms around her from behind, nuzzling into her body before laying a kiss onto her shoulder.

“It’s alright.” She sighed, squeezing at your arms, kissing your palm gently, “I know how busy you are.”

“Have you eaten?” She nodded, “I managed to scarf down a sandwich earlier. We’ve got some time before make up comes, did you want to go lie down?”

“Yes please.” Elizabeth turned in your arms, now able to kiss you firmly, holding you tightly to her, happy at least that one of the things she loved most was still able to be held by her.

“Did you pick a speech?” You murmured into her shirt, “just so I can send it off first.”

“I’m not going to use one.”

“Oh?”

“It’ll be fine little one. Don’t fret.” She kissed your temple gently and let you out of her arms, letting you guide her to the bedroom.

You shifted on top of the covers, pulling a smaller blanket over you while Elizabeth pulled you into her chest, letting you rest there. Her hand idly played with your hair, the other one interlacing with yours over her stomach. It was quiet for nearly a half hour, both of you half thought the other one was asleep before Elizabeth spoke incredibly soft.

“How do you feel about Boston?”

“I like it.” You smiled to yourself, “spent a few years there post college. It’s quiet enough without being too quiet, if that makes sense.”

“It does.”

“You thinkin’ of finally cashing in one of those vacations in a couple of months?”

“I was thinking more like next week.” She stated and you snorted a small laugh.

“You just got back into the Oval. I know the boys are always off golfing but doesn’t that look bad if you jet off for a weekend right away?”

“Not a weekend.” She kissed the top of your head, “I was thinking more long term.”

“You firing me?” You teased, shifting so your elbow was propped on the bed, head in your hand and she chuckled.

“No…but you said you didn’t want to work for Warner.”

“Elizabeth…” your brow furrowed, “what’re you trying to say?”

“I’m resigning. Warner will be sworn in at midnight.”

“After everything?” You asked softly, but you saw the look of peace in her eyes, a look of true happiness you hadn’t seen in practically over a year.

“If I go out now, I’m going on my own terms, I still keep all the usual benefits, as you said, my head held high. It doesn’t matter that we got the Russian case taken care of, just because it’s not them doesn’t mean there won’t be another country or Senator of my own trying to take me down. I did what I could, I led to the best of my ability, and if the people don’t want that, sometimes it’s better to take the high road and get out alive while you can. An honourable discharge if you will.”

Instead of replying, you dropped back into her chest, your hand playing with hers as you thought about everything that had gone on in the last few years. How it had started out as a potentially temporary job and morphed into a life you’d never seen coming, and one that you absolutely loved, and if you were going to give up part of it, you certainly didn’t want it to be Elizabeth.

“Boston, hey?” You murmured and she hummed in response, “you wanna move out there, be flannel wearing lesbians, go to Red Sox games and eat clam chowder all the time?” Elizabeth laughed at your tease,

“Yeah. I do. I’ll even teach you how to fish.”

“You know how to fish?” You jumped back up into your arm to actually see her face again, ready to call her on her bluff.

“Yeah.” She nodded, “I used to take Andrew out all the time.” She had a faraway look in her eye, but this time an actual smile on her cheeks, “god I miss the ocean.”

“Tell me about it.” You groaned, “I despise being land locked.”

“What’d’you think?”

“I think it sounds like a really, really great idea.”

“You don’t think I’m wrong to give up the presidency?”

“Elizabeth…if I were you I would’ve walked after the first assassination attempt.” She chuckled quietly, “I mean it.” You leant in, kissing her softly, “let’s go to Boston. I’ve always wanted to go back. And if it sucks after a year, we’ll try somewhere else until we find a place that’s meant to be.”

“I don’t think that’ll be very hard little one.”

“Hmm?” You cocked a brow, a warm smile on your face, understanding what she meant. She laughed, pulling you to her for another kiss. Keeping your lips attached, you pulled her up to sitting, your legs draped across her lap. You held her cheek in your palm as you searched her eyes, “are you sure about this?”

“Easiest decision I’ve ever made.”

_______ Taglist: @charabs @dereksprentiss @natasha-danvers @ineedafinghug @veteranwerewolf95 @billiedeannovak @stardust-galaxies @laurenhope13 @randomthingssss @beccabarba @farahs-faeling @imlike-so-gaydude @thatesqcrush @bisexual-dreamer02 @altsvu @svulife-rl @svushots @gay-ass-bitch @lesbianspacecowboy @whispered-tear-drops @wannabe-fic-reader @witchxaf @sarcasticmami @angelicdestieldemon @gaylorrds @smuttty @infiniteoddball @delphineecormierr @gabby-mueller23 @venablemayfairgoode @solemnnova @whimsicallymad @mysticfalls01 @1000spices @oliviaswifey @thatgaygiraffesquirrelgirl @Cloudymd @screenee

#Elizabeth keane #elizabeth keane x reader #little one #elizabeth keane series #Homeland #elizabeth keane fluff

[mar-iiposa]

"You're What?"

prompt: How would the Bayverse boys react to their s/o finding out that she is pregnant, and she is afraid/scared to tell them? The pregnancy was not planned. Hope you're having a great day/night <3

a/n: this was requested by an anonymous user as a bit of a long story, meant for all four turtles, but I'm deciding on separating it so it looks better on my masterlist later on. hope that enjoy, and make sure to read the tags I have included down below, just in case !

warnings: slight mention of abortion but that's it, mention of needles drawing blood (not too graphic of course), unplanned pregnancy, mentions of unprotected sex.

word count: 2.6k

"Y/N, are you okay?"

Your roommate, April's, voice rang out when she saw you hurry towards the bathroom in such a rush, for the third time today, and it was just barely 2 pm. She was concerned that you weren't doing so good, never having seen you in a peculiar state like this before. As late of this past week, you've started to show signs of illness and restlessness, constantly moody, which we knew was odd for you at times. "Do you need anything?" She gently knocked on the bathroom door, hearing the faucet run on the other side before it was turned off. "I'm good, thanks," You murmur, loud enough for her to at least comprehend what you're saying. Outside of the restroom, April looked down for a moment, hesitant on whether to truly believe you or not. However, she didn't bother to really question it. "I'll be out, text if you need me."

After getting up a little too fast, you feel a small, sharp pain in your breasts, causing you to wince and cup them lightly out of instinct. Over the last few days, you've been noticing some changes. Weird ones too. For starters, you missed your period, it was supposed to roll around about, what, three/four days ago. You kept it tracked monthly on your phone, and by now, it would seem to probably come later than usually expected. Never did you have an irregular menstrual cycle, sometimes periods tend to come a little bit late but this was still odd enough. Not to forget, you had been vomiting like crazy at times, especially in the mornings and early afternoons of the day, sometimes at night if you're "lucky" enough. Topping those off, you felt fatigued, you were bloated, strangely moody, and you really needed to pee way more. A lot more, actually.

You had turned off the faucet in the bathroom, hunching over the sink, still with little droplets of water sliding down and into the drain. You look into the mirror, bags under your eyes have started to form from lack of sleep after literally vomiting your guts out in the middle of the night, having to hold your own hair back yourself if April would be completely knocked out from work. It wasn't a rare occurrence for her to be passed out on her bed or the couch, after a long day of working. You were employed, too, it was just that you took a day off to find out what the hell these symptoms were. Who knows, maybe you were falling sick?

You do your hair and style it just a little, unbothered by if you looked like crap or not, you could care less. You were throwing up and felt almost sick, why wouldn't you look unappealing at the very least? Grabbing your keys and things, you make your way towards the subway almost downtown, avoiding eye contact with almost anyone and everyone, not feeling at your best. It felt like your self-esteem had taken a downwards decline in the last couple of days prior. Not that you never got irritated or anything, but it was peculiar to you that all of a sudden, you had mood swings that changed from one mood to another like a bolt of lightning. Hell, even your boyfriend, Leo, noticed fairly quickly, but he decided not to press on you too much about it.

Getting off of the subway train, you head to your physician's office, opening the door of the building, the cooled atmosphere of the room hitting you within seconds of your entrance of the room.

"Hello, Ms. L/N, are you here for your appointment today?" The female receptionist gazed up at you from her glasses, frames pink, wearing a light shawl over her arms and shoulders. "I am," You give her a nod, her gaze traveling back to the computer screen as she typed away, the sound of her dark red acrylics hitting the smooth black keys. "Sure does get cold in here," She chuckled, a small short in the middle of her laugh, "take a seat, miss."

Doing so, you sit near the TV of the waiting room, the magazines on the table ahead stared back at you, the words 'VOGUE' written on the modernistic cover. The television was of bland taste, just going over the weather expected for today and the rest of the week and into the weekend. You cradle yourself slightly, your e/c eyes flickering down to your fingers and nails. About fifteen minutes or so later, the door to the back of the office opened, a nurse appearing in her scrub, "Y/N L/N?" Perking up at the mention of your name, you both make eye contact and she steps aside for you to walk in, giving a nod before directing you to a nearby room. Taking a seat, you wait until the doctor comes into view, greeting you with a friendly smile. "Ms. L/N, hi," She shook your hand, holding a clipboard under her left arm as she entered, "how are you? Is there a reason as to why you made an appointment for today?" Seconds after listing off your symptoms, she eyed you a bit suspiciously, writing down with her pen. "I'll send one of the nurses in for a blood test, I'm sure you'll be free to go then," The doctor pursed her lips in a tight smile, looking as though she had something on her mind as to what you could've had.

You sit there, for what feels like hours upon hours of silence, and you don't even notice the nurse coming in through the door at some point. "Alright, just relax for me." A pinching at your skin came from the needle, and the nurse draws some blood from your arm. Closing your eyes and glancing away from the view, the needle is drawn away from your arm after a while, patching the spot up with a band-aid. "You should get your answers shortly," 'Angela Bardot' (the nurse) states with a small, friendly smile as you give her a nod for a reply in return.

The receptionist sends you a wave goodbye as you approach the door on the way out, nodding your head and giving a wave back. Traveling home among the streets of New York, your mind is constantly filling up to the absolute brim of what the results would be. What if you were terrible sick? Had an illness that was incurable or deadly? How would you tell the ones you loved? Always tending to think of negative outcomes was a habit of yours, for as long as you can remember. You're so deep into your thoughts as you don't realize your boyfriend had called you a couple of times already. You unlock your phone after typing in the digits of your password, tapping onto his contact. "Hey," His voice rings from the other side, "I was trying to call you, is everything alright?" You can hear the worried tone through his end.

You run a hand through your hair as you neared the corner, coming closer to your New York apartment. "Yeah," you breathe out into the air of the apartment building, taking the provided elevator, "yeah, I'm okay." You could almost see the look of relief in those blue sapphire eyes of his, he responds, "Sorry, I almost panicked when you didn't pick up." You chuckle a little at that, knowing you almost always picked up on phone calls, holding onto your keys as you pushed your front entrance door open, "Nah, you know I can handle myself, Leo." You grin hearing his voice, chuckling at that. "I know, I know." 

"I'll see you tonight?" He asks on his end, you immediately smile. "I give you my word." You can feel him smiling from 'ear to-ear' at your response, "Okay, I'll see you later then. Love you, princess." Your smile growing warm, heart fluttering at the words coming from your boyfriend, you speak back into the phone, "Love you too."

He was the first to hang up on the cell phone call, before you fall back onto your grey couch with a heavy sigh, soon leaning forward with your head in your hands, elbows firmly sitting on top of your knees. The TV is turned on from the remote in your hand, head leaning back into the couch, but only enough to still keep your eyes on the screen. Your phone rings again, and you assume it might be Leo again, calling to tell you something he might have forgotten or who knows what. Turning the phone over from it's front facing the cushions, and you recognize the contact number. "Hello?" You pick up, a recognizable voice rang through. "Hi, this is Dr. Rullston, I'm calling you to discuss your blood test results, yes?" Sitting straight up quickly, you feel yourself nod almost frantically, "Yes, it's not anything, right?" A long pause resonates between the two of you, and you can slightly hear the intake of a breath from her.

"Ms. L/N, you're pregnant."

Your heart completely drops as soon as you heard that, standing up from your seat within milliseconds. "What? I- I can't belie- !" She continues, "About almost two weeks pregnant is what I'm seeing. Congratulations miss." No, no, I didn't want a baby! I didn't know this would happen! 

You look down at the floor as your breathing is nearly stressed, "Tha- Thank you, Dr. Rullston." Quick to hang up first, you almost drop your phone onto the apartment's hard wooden floor. How was this possible? Well, you knew how pregnancy and sex worked, but this was something completely shocking, at least to you! You think you at least had intercourse with a condom on! You and Leonar- Oh God, Leo! How would he react to this? He would be disappointed, he could leave you! Who would want to raise a child with you? Who would even want a knocked up lady if he did leave the relationship you had been building for practically a year?! You could get an abortion, that's it! No, no, no, you couldn't see yourself going through with that. Seeing others get abortions was something you were supportive of, but you had no absolute idea what in the hell to do! Do you want to keep it? That was something you didn't know the answer to. 

Two hours roll by until you're dressed a little more properly now, on your path to the turtles' lair in the sewers. As of now, you're (somewhat) rocking some jeans, with an old t-shirt, your commonly-worn shoes, and your hair combed through. Sticking your head through the lair, Mikey spots you straightaway, quickly riding on his skateboard towards you, guarding your own stomach, afraid for impact. Luckily for you (and maybe your fetus), there is no impact. "Yo, Y/N!" He gave you his regular fist pump, "how's it hangin'?" He notices you guarding your stomach, emitting a laugh as he points at you, "What's with the stomach guarding?" You realize your arms protecting your stomach, pulling them away fairly quickly. "Just, uh- Just hungry is all!" Michelangelo eyed you for a second or two before shrugging, picking up his board with a swift kick at its tail, "M'kay! Leo's in his room by the way. Catch you later!" He rode off again, presumably to bother either Raph or Donnie with his "dazzling personality."

Nearing Leonardo's room, you were undecided on the option of telling him about the growing baby inside of you or not. You didn't know. You didn't know what he'd think, what he'd say, how he would react, or if his perspective of you would shift entirely. Every fiber of your being grew anxious, scared to share the news with him. Or not. Leaning against the doorway of his room, he looked up from his katana, a smile gracing his features. "Hey," He stood up from his spot on the bed as you approach him, "Hi." Leonardo glanced down at your shorter human self, grabbing your hands to hold into his abnormally larger ones. "Took you a while to get here." Yeah, it did because you couldn't stop vomiting into the toilet until you got the strength to eventually walk all the way down here. "Sorry, busy," You threw an excuse at him, the leader of the clan nods. "Uh-huh," He takes your hand and leads you to his bed, "you're not overwhelming yourself, are you?" Knowing how concerned he can tend to be, you shakily exhale a little, giving a closed-mouth smile. "No, not really."

"You know ho-" You bit your lower lip, feeling the need to interrupt, "Leo, there's-- there's something I need to tell you." He paused for a little, knowing there was something up, a feeling in his gut. "Well what is it?" You can feel that pit of anxiety start to blossom within you once again, your palms nearly growing sweaty as you try to gather your words. Carefully wanting to break it to him was something you wanted to do, and correctly too. "Y/N?" He sends you a fervent glance, "is something wro-?" 

"I'm pregnant."

He's taken aback by the sentence you had just formed, staring at you, with almost little to no emotion being expressed. He's speechless. Out of words, completely. "You're what?! With- With my ba-?" Giving the leader a small, slow nod, it finally makes sense to him. "That's why you missed my call? Y/N, you sh-" You feel tears swell up in your e/c eyes, a hot droplet starting to slide down your left cheek, "I know it's all my fault. I should have asked for an abortion before I left that doctor's office. And you don't want a kid, I can see perfectly see that, and just know that I'm sor-" A warm green hand cups the side of your face, endearing blue eyes look at you and hold your stare as a thumb comes to wipe your new, built-up tears. Tender lips come to kiss your forehead. "I want this. Y/N, please listen to me when I say it'll be alright. I won't let you and the baby down, okay?" Leo's words are kind, softly spoken as he offers you a pursed smile while holding your face in his hand, "You'll be fine."

Your breathing is starting to calm down as you meet his eyes, your hand coming touch his on your cheek. "How far? How far are you, I mean?" Feeling at ease, your eyes are still watery with tears, a smile growing on your lips, "Two weeks." He grows soft at your reply, eyes flickering down towards your stomach. The stomach that held his kid inside of it. "How big are they?" You hold your hand up and leave a little gap between your index finger and your thumb, "Like a little seed." A smile of joy lights up his face before he carefully runs the bottom of your t-shirt up to expose your stomach to him. He pursed his lips together once more, fighting off tears as he gives a breathy laugh. "I love them already." You grin to your significant other, kissing his cheek.

"And we love you too."

#tmnt imagines #tmnt leonardo #tmnt 2016 #tmnt 2014 #tmnt #tmnt 2k12 #tmnt leo x reader #tmnt leo 2012 #tmnt leo imagine #tmnt 2003 #teenage mutant ninja turtles #teenage mutant ninja turtle imagine #teenage mutant ninja turtles imagine #teenage mutant ninja turtles imagines #tmnt x reader #tmnt leonardo x reader #tmnt fanfiction #tmnt fanart

[fanficshiddles]

Horned Shadow, One shot

Summary: I had a dream and wanted to write it down, and add more to it. Harley is out camping in the woods and starts getting spooked at some unsavoury sounds and sights… Just a little spooky one shot. Well, I don’t know if it’s even THAT spooky or not really. Lol!

- Harley was so pleased to be at her favourite secluded spot, camping. She was in the middle of the woods, next to a lake. With no one else around for miles and miles, simply perfect.

It was nice to get away from everything for a few days.

She had set up her tent, a small camp fire and was ready to relax for a few days. She had a cooler with enough food and she planned to do a bit of fishing in the lake. But of course, she had extra supplies just in-case the fish weren’t co-operating with her this weekend.

After having some dinner, she went for an evening walk in the moonlight. But she made sure not to venture too far from camp, just in-case. When she returned, she just got straight into her tent and got comfy for the night.

It was the middle of the night and she woke up with a start when she heard movement outside her tent. Twigs snapping and leaves shuffling. Her heart started racing as she could then hear footsteps wandering around her camp. And a large, dark, shadow fell over her tent with visible horns.

Curling up into her sleeping bag she closed her eyes tightly and tried to imagine she was somewhere else. Or maybe she was just dreaming? Yeah, sure that’s what it was. She couldn’t hear any more movement after a short while, but she wasn’t sure if that was just because all she could hear was her heart pounding against her chest.

Being brave, she opened her eyes. The light from her campfire was still on, but she couldn’t see any shadows now. No new ones, anyway. The trees did cast shadows over her, but that was all there was now.

It was safe to say she barely got any sleep that night, every little noise made her jump. She kept thinking about the dark shadow with horns, what kind of animal was that?

As soon as light came in the next morning, she rushed out of her tent and ran to pee behind a bush. Her toilet spot. She had been bursting, but was no way leaving her tent till it was light.

Looking around her camp, it didn’t look like anyone had been here. There were no footprints in the mud and leaves, apart from her own. Her campfire was untouched and her seat that she had made out of logs was still as it was, too.

It was ridiculous, she had been here before and there was nothing to worry about then. She had a great time. But as the hours passed by, she found she couldn’t relax. Even in the daylight. So she decided she would just pack up and go home.

But when she returned to her car, she was horrified to find all four tyres were flat. So flat, not even enough to slowly get her to the nearest garage. Which was about twenty miles away. When she gave them a ring, they couldn’t get out to her until tomorrow. No one could till tomorrow, even her breakdown insurance.

‘You’ve got to be kidding me?’ She sighed and leaned back against her car.

Now she had a big dilemma, she couldn’t get out of the woods as she was too far in to walk anywhere. So she knew she was going to need to camp out for the night again. The thought made her stomach churn nervously.

She had a few options, she could’ve slept in her car. But it was a small car and she knew she would be more comfortable in her tent. Plus anyone could look in the windows, at least the tent was covered. Another option was set the tent up next to the car, but she wouldn’t have a water source close by, and making a fire here was a bit riskier.

So really, she knew the best option was to go back to her camping spot. By the lake.

Putting on her brave girl pants, she started the walk back there.

When she returned, she was relieved to see the fire was still going slightly. So she got it going again properly before setting up her tent once again, which didn’t take that long as she was a pro by now.

Harley kept her mind busy by fishing for most of the afternoon, she got a catch which she was pleased with. After eating a good meal, she got herself ready for bed. It was really early still, but she wanted to be in her tent safely before it started to get dark.

Her nerves were completely shot after last night.

After settling in for the night, reading a book with her torch, she was almost dozing off when she heard a loud snapping noise. But it didn’t sound like it was just a twig or stick snapping, it sounded like a full-sized tree!

Freezing, her ears were on high alert as she tried to listen for any other noises. But there was nothing…

‘It’s just animals, calm down.’ She said to herself, though her voice was really shaky.

She wasn’t able to sleep after that, so decided to keep reading to try and pass the time. The sooner the night was over with, the sooner she would get her car sorted and get home.

But soon, the sound of heavy footsteps could be heard slowly making their way towards her tent again. Her whole body started shaking, she looked at the side of her tent where the fire was, she could see the light from it.

Then, like last night, a large shadow over came her tent. Still with horns. For a moment, she just kept still and stared wide eyed at the shadow. But then the whole tent started shaking violently, making her scream and close her eyes as she tucked herself in.

The sound of her tent shaking slowly subsided, she was breathing hard as she boldly looked up. But there was no sign of anything, though what was worse, her fire had gone out as there was no light at all coming from outside now.

‘Get a grip, Harley. This is ridiculous! Surely just come kids messing around.’ She huffed at herself and got out of her sleeping bag. She pulled on her boots and, with a lot of hesitation, opened the zip of the tent and stepped outside.

But weirdly, the fire was still going bright.

‘Odd.’ She frowned and looked around, she could see a good distance around her because of the light from the fire. But she couldn’t see anything. It must be her mind playing tricks on her, seeing things that weren’t there…

Taking a few deep breaths, she sat on her log and poked at the fire a few times, making sure it would keep going.

But she jumped out of her skin when she heard a deep, low chuckle from behind her. Turning around quickly, she scanned the area but there was no sign of anyone. Was her mind just playing tricks on her again?

When Harley turned back to the fire, she screamed as she saw someone crouching down at the other side of it. Through the flames she saw piercing green eyes staring back at her. He had shoulder length black hair and pale skin… But he was wearing a helmet with large golden horns!

Before she could even think about getting up and running, he stood up straight, towering over her completely. The fire suddenly died out, and that’s when he lunged straight for her.

Crows from high up in the trees above Harley’s camp started cawing and flew up into the night sky, scattering from the scene.

Three days later, two hikers came across Harley’s abandoned car in the woods. The owner of the car nowhere to be seen.

#Loki #Tom Hiddleston #one shot #fan fiction #horned shadow #Loki x OFC #loki x original female character #spooky #ish

[erin-bo-berin]

Cabin Fever

MASTERLIST

Here’s a surprise daddy Spencer fic. I couldn’t wait to post this one because I’m so in love with daddy Spencer (shocker I know). This was an anonymous requested fic about the reader and their baby surprising Spencer at work. Enjoy ALL the feels.

Spencer Reid/Reader

Rated: G (tons of daddy Spencer fluff)

Word Count: 3,713

Cries echoed from the bedroom and you jogged up the steps from your quick trip downstairs. Your brows furrowed and mouth turned down in a frown as the cries got louder.

“I’m coming, baby, don’t worry,” you soothed.

You entered the nursery, picking up your baby boy out of his crib. Apparently nap time was over.

“Hi there handsome,” you smiled, cradling him in your arms, “Did you sleep well?”

Motherhood was different than anything else you had experienced before. It was tough, challenging and sleep hardly existed, but you felt such an enormous love for your son that it was worth it all. 

Named after his daddy, Spencer Alexander Reid—Alex for short—was the light of you and your boyfriend Spencer’s life.

It had only been roughly a month since you’d given birth. You’d only been out of the house once with Alex since and that’d been his first doctor’s appointment. You were going a little crazy cooped up in the house while Spencer was at work.

You laid him gently on his changing table, unbuttoning his onesie in preparation to change his diaper.

“How about we not pee on mommy this time, hmm?”

He cooed, waving his arms in the air. You pulled out a new diaper, grabbing an extra to place over his lower half to prevent anymore peeing incidents.

“Would you like to go visit daddy today at work? He’ll be so surprised to see you.”

You gently wiped him clean, picking up his legs with one hand to slide the diaper under his bottom.

“All your aunties and uncles at the BAU will be so happy to see you again too,” you smiled, pulling the tabs of the diaper closed.

“They won’t believe how big you’ve gotten since the last time they saw you.”

He made a few little grunts, kicking his legs.

Spencer’s work family had come to visit you and Alex in the hospital. You were so touched by all the love and excitement they had for the new little “BAU baby”.

You leaned over him, kissing his face repeatedly making him wriggle more. You chuckled, picking him up once again.

“How about a little swing time while mommy gets ready?”

You strapped him in his rocking swing and pulled the contraption close to you to keep an eye on him while you got ready.

It took over an hour just to pack his bag with everything you might need.

Between picking him up to comfort him and trying to figure out all what to bring, the hand on the clock went by faster than you’d realized.

It was after one in the afternoon when you’d finally got out the door.

•

“I knew I sensed baby cuteness from down the hall!”

Penelope Garcia, the BAU’s technical analyst was the first to find you sitting in the briefing room, Alex in his carrier on the table.

“We thought we’d surprise Spence at work. I didn’t see any of the team in the bullpen, so I just thought I’d wait in here.”

“Yeah, they’re on the way back from that local Virginia case we’ve been working on,” she said.

“You finally caught the guy?”

“Oh yeah, a real bad one, but aren’t they all? Enough of the bad stuff though because I have got to hold that little bundle of joy.”

You smiled, unfastening the buckles of his carrier, picking him up and handing him to Garcia.

“Hello, little guy. When did you get so big?”

She cuddled him close, baby talking to him.

“Y/N?”

You looked up and saw Spencer and the rest of the team walking in the room.

“What are you doing here? You’re supposed to be resting! Are you still bleeding as badly as you were this morning? Did you see the postpartum pads I left for you?”

“Spencer,” you flushed, eyeing the rest of his team, embarrassed.

“Don’t even worry, Y/N. Been there, done that.”

The comment came from JJ as she breezed in, waving a hand in the air like it wasn’t a big deal before coming over and hugging you tight.

“Twice as a matter of fact,” she continued, “It does eventually go away, by the way.”

“Does it? Cause I feel like it never will,” you groaned.

“Y/N,” Spencer’s tone was stern, but concerned.

“Okay, okay. I was going stir crazy, so I thought we'd surprise daddy at work.”

He smiled, coming over to you and wrapping his arms around you, kissing your head.

“As long as you’re feeling okay, though,” he said.

“I am, don’t worry.”

Alex gurgled in Penelope’s arms while the team surrounded her, loving on him.

“Hate to break it to you Reid, but the kid looks nothing like you,” Rossi said.

“Thankfully.”

“Hey,” you hit Spencer’s stomach playfully, “He would’ve been just as cute if he looked like you.”

“He’s the spitting image of you Y/N, I swear,” Tara shook her head.

“How are you sleeping?” Matt asked.

Matt had five kids; he’d been through this quite a few times before.

“Well he’s at least letting us sleep a few hours a night,” you said.

Alex started fussing in Garcia’s arms.

“I think someone wants daddy,” she said, handing him over to Spencer.

“Hi little man, daddy’s missed you,” he kissed Alex’s head, cradling him in his arms.

As if magic, Alex immediately settled, his fussing quieted.

“So Y/N, when are you gonna let me babysit so you two can get started on number 2?” Garcia smirked, wiggling her eyebrows at the two of you.

“As soon as you and Luke have your first one,” you teased.

“Whoa, whoa, hey now,” Luke said putting his hands up, “Garcia and I are more than happy with just Roxy right now, aren’t we bella?”

“Yes,” Garcia nodded, “Doesn’t mean I can't make more room in my heart for another little baby Reid.”

“Penelope, she’s only five weeks postpartum,” Emily broke in, finally walking into the room welcoming you with a hug as well.

“I’m sure she’s not even been cleared to have sex again,” JJ added.

“Guys, we can stay out of my vagina’s business?” you chuckled.

“Technically, it’s your uter-”

“Spencer!” you cut him off.

“I love you guys, but this conversation got weird real fast,” you laughed.

You looked over to see Spencer walking the length of the room with Alex, talking quietly to him.

Most of the team had gone back to the bullpen to work and Emily gave Spencer a few files that he needed to look through later before leaving. Only JJ and Penelope remained in the room.

“Have you been good for mommy today?” Spencer asked rubbing his belly, “She’s having a bit of a hard time after having you. You were quite the big baby, little man. You weighed nine pounds. I’m still amazed that she managed to push you out.”

You chuckled, overhearing a bit of his one sided conversation.

“I can’t get over how great he is at being a dad,” JJ said, watching him, “I mean I knew he always would be, but just seeing it is kinda—”

“Mind blowing?” you filled in, nodding your head in agreement, “I know. Some days it still doesn’t seem real that we actually have a kid.”

“I’m pretty sure if you let him, he’d try babywearing while doing a geo map or something,” Penelope said.

“I don’t doubt it,” you chuckled, “He’s so attached to Alex. It’s almost a good thing he didn’t turn out to be a girl.”

“Why’s that?” JJ questioned.

“Cause she’d have Spencer wrapped around her finger.”

“That’s why I say, baby number 2,” Penelope grinned.

“Maybe when he’s a little older,” you smiled, turning back to watch your two boys.

Spencer was talking animatedly to Alex, making silly faces down at him. Alex was smiling up at him and cooing in response.

“How’s breastfeeding going?” JJ asked.

“Ugh,” you groaned, “So. Much. Pain.”

“Lanolin is a blessing,” she answered.

“Ain’t that the truth,” you nodded, “I pump a lot though because Spence likes to feed him as well. It gets Alex used to a bottle plus it lets Spence bond with him. Two birds, one stone.”

“I did that a lot with Henry and Michael. Will loved to feed them.”

“Luke always leaves feeding Roxy to me,” Garcia grumbled, “Heaven help me if we ever actually have kids.”

As if on cue, Alex started crying.

“Speaking of feeding,” you said, “Sounds like someone is hungry.”

“How the heck do you know that’s his hungry cry?” Spencer asked, bewildered.

You gave him a look.

“Spencer, a mother knows. Besides I’ve learned his cries.”

“Did you bring a bottle?” he asked.

“Does Garfield love lasagna?” you retorted, sarcastically, reaching into the diaper bag to get a bottle.

“Touché,” he laughed.

Alex cried harder, his fists shaking in the air.

“I know buddy, we’re getting a bottle,” Spencer said patting his bottom, swaying him a bit.

He took the uncapped bottle from you and put the nipple to Alex’s lips. His mouth closed around it and he started eating, his cries vanished.

“That’s good stuff isn’t it Alex?” Spencer cooed to him, watching him eat.

JJ and Garcia had slipped out moments before, needing to get back to work. They promised they’d come say bye before you left, though.

Alex kicked his feet while he ate, his eyes roaming the things that were in his sight: Spencer’s face and the ceiling lights.

You sat at the table watching the two of them, a smile on your face. It was moments like this that you wanted to hold on to forever.

“What?” he asked when he noticed you staring.

“Nothing, just enjoying watching my boys.”

Spencer smiled, holding Alex’s small foot in his palm. He tickled it gently causing Alex to yank it away.

“Sorry, bud. Eating is important work.”

You yawned, resting your head in your hand.

“How much sleep did you get last night?”

Spencer was good at helping get up with Alex at night, but most of the time you let him sleep since you knew he had work early in the morning.

“I don’t know, three? Four hours?” 

You stifled another yawn.

“He was up around 11 pm at first. I fed him and changed him. Then again at 1 am and didn’t go back to sleep again until almost 3. At 5, he needed a third diaper change of the night, got a second wind and then was out by 6:30. By then you were up.”

“Babe, you need to sleep or else your body will take longer to heal.”

“I know, but it’s hard to sleep when he sleeps. I’m too busy trying to get other things done that I don’t have time to accomplish when he’s awake.”

“What if you take a nap in here and I take him for the afternoon?” he suggested.

“Spence, you’re at work, you can’t.”

“Yes I can. Garcia doesn’t have a new case for us yet and it’s just a lot of paperwork that needs to be done.”

“I don’t know,” you hesitated, “He can be a handful when he’s fighting sleep.”

“Y/N, I got this, okay? You need sleep to function and he needs his mommy to get some sleep. Don’t you, Alex?”

He fussed in response, the nipple having slipped out of his mouth.

“My bad, my bad,” Spencer chuckled, putting it back into his mouth.

“Okay,” you relented, “A nap does sound great.”

“Then it’s settled.” 

He bent down to grab Alex’s diaper bag.

“There’s extra diapers and wipes in there, two more bottles that you should probably put in the fridge, a couple of pacifiers, a blanket if he’s cold, his baby wrap, a change of clothes, a—“

“Y/N,” Spencer interrupted you, “Don’t worry, okay? If there’s any problem, I’ll get you. Besides JJ is always around to help with any baby qualms I might have.”

You nodded, moving to sit on the couch in the room.

“Sleep well,” he said, leaning down to kiss you.

You thanked him, your eyelids already beginning to flutter closed. 

You were sound asleep before he even left the room.

•

“Did I miss it being bring your kid to work day?” JJ chuckled, walking up to Spencer’s desk.

Spencer sat at his desk, one arm holding his son, his chin balancing the bottle that Alex was still eating from as he filled out the paperwork that needed to be completed.

“I made Y/N take a nap in the briefing room and told her I’d take Alex for the afternoon. Besides, I secretly think Emily just wants him around so she can hog him later,” Spencer chuckled.

“Well you’re taking multitasking to a new level, that’s for sure.”

“Oh just wait until I start babywearing. It’s a shame I can’t just bring him along with me on cases. I’d have no problem wearing him while doing a geo profile.”

“Funny, Penelope said something on the lines of that.”

“I just feel like I can’t get enough time with him,” he frowned, looking down at him, “I mean he’s already five weeks and I feel like he’s already changed so much.”

He was close to finishing his bottle and he’d have to burp him in a minute.

“They grow up fast, Spence. I wish I could tell you that it gets easier balancing this job and a family, but it isn’t always that simple. What I can tell you is that cherishing the little moments like this are important. You’ll have a million of them, but each and every one is special. No matter where you work, what job you do, you’ll always feel like you’re missing out on something whether you actually are or not. You just learn to enjoy every single moment you get with them,” JJ smiled.

JJ’s boys were no longer babies—now 11 and 4—but she cherished them and her family very much. FBI work did make time for family difficult, but Spencer had always seen her make it work. He knew that if it was possible for her, he could make it work. He loved his little boy so much already and missed him dearly while at work, that’s why a rare afternoon like this was so special to him.

“Thanks, JJ.”

He pulled the empty bottle away from Alex’s mouth, picking him up to burp him.

“If you need me, I’ll just be juggling diapers and paperwork over here,” he grinned.

She snickered, patting him on the shoulder as she walked off, heading to Emily’s office.

“So, what do you think about daddy’s work?”

He tapped his back gently, rubbing circles on Alex’s back. He kept talking as he burped him.

“Pretty impressive, huh? Do you like my desk with all of daddy’s books and pictures of you and mommy?”

Alex fussed, his stomach most likely bothering him. Spencer tapped his back a little harder.

“Come on big man, you’ll feel a lot better if you burp.”

He wriggled against Spencer’s shoulder, fussing more.

“I’m impressed it’s your first day on the job and you’re only five weeks. I didn’t get into the FBI until I was 22.”

It was then that Alex finally burped, big and loud, causing a few smiles and laughs from neighboring agents.

“There we go. You oughta feel better after that.”

Spencer felt a wet spot on his shoulder and groaned, realizing too late he forgot to grab a burp cloth. He sat Alex in his carrier while he tried to wipe the spit up off his shirt.

“You’re lucky you’re cute Alex because I don’t think your spit up compliments the color of this shirt.”

He kicked his legs, shrieking.

“Yeah, yeah, I know. You’re proud.” 

But his shrieking didn’t stop there, it soon became fussing which quickly turned into crying. His face scrunched up and his legs thrashed.

“I guess you don’t want to be in your carrier now,” Spencer mused, picking him up.

“Is it nap time for you?”

He glanced at his watch, noticing it was close to 2:30. Y/N usually put him down for an afternoon nap around this time.

“Now I see what mommy was talking about.”

Spencer kissed Alex’s cheek, laying Alex against his chest. One hand rested against his head, supporting his neck while the other laid gently on his back. He looked through the glass window of the briefing room and saw Y/N sound asleep on the couch. He smiled to himself, his heart warming at the sight.

He had so much love for her. From carrying Alex for nine months to working harder than she ever had at something, just to bring him into this world. Now, she sacrificed her own needs to take care of their son. He was glad he’d made her rest; she deserved it more than anything.

Plus, if he was honest, he was thoroughly enjoying his time with Alex.

He rocked back and forth in his desk chair, trying to soothe the stubborn whimpers that still came from Alex.

“Do you want daddy to tell you a story?”

Spencer looked down and saw Alex squirming a bit, trying to get comfortable. He reached for the pacifier on his desk, placing it gently into Alex’s mouth. He immediately started sucking on it, the pacifier moving just the slightest.

“Well once upon a time, daddy delivered a baby. Just like you! It wasn’t you though, unfortunately. Mommy preferred an actual doctor to me, but I did get to cut your umbilical cord. But, I had memorized the manual on childbirth back when your auntie JJ was pregnant with Henry, just in case she went into labor in the field. Anyway, I’m getting distracted.”

His fingers stroked Alex’s tiny clenched hands and smiled when his hand grasped his finger.

“There was this big, bad guy who had hurt a lot of people to prove that he could be a good father. Yeah, it was kind of messed up. But his wife was going to have a baby. In fact, she was in labor when I got there with my old partner Morgan. Her contractions were pretty intense and there was no way she was going to make it to the hospital in time. So while Morgan arrested the bad guy, I helped the lady deliver her baby. Just like you, it was a little boy. Up until then I never thought I’d seen a more beautiful human. But that was before I’d met your mommy and you.”

Alex sighed, his movements becoming more sporadic and his breathing more even. Spencer peeked down and saw his eyelids growing heavy.

“In the end, the mother named her little boy after me. He’s a Spencer like the both of us. Pretty cool, right?”

There was no further sounds from Alex for he was fast asleep, content against his daddy’s chest.

•

When you woke, the sky was already darkening outside.

“Holy crap, how long did I sleep?!”

You looked around for your phone. In the midst of your searching, you didn’t hear anyone walk in.

“It’s around 6 pm.”

You looked up to see Emily walking in, smiling.

“Have a nice nap?”

“Sounds more like I went into a coma,” you laughed, “I’m so sorry about this.”

“Don’t worry,” she waved a hand, “Spence has been parading Alex all over the bullpen all afternoon. He even gave him a tour of the BAU. I think Alex was a little less than impressed though.”

You giggled at the image. You didn’t put it past Spencer for doing that.

“I hope he wasn’t a distraction or any trouble,” you worried.

“Definitely not. I got some obligatory baby snuggles in though.”

“They are the best, aren’t they?” you agreed.

You looked through the window into the bullpen, seeing no sign of Spencer and Alex.

“Would you happen to know where they went?”

“I think they’re in Rossi’s office playing with Alex. Rossi’s teaching him how to play peekaboo.”

“Spencer or Alex?” you joked, causing her to laugh.

You grabbed your phone and purse, saying your goodbyes to her and walked down to Rossi’s office.

“I feel like a grandpa all over again,” you heard Rossi say as you approached, “But I’ve never had a grandchild this young.”

“Well you’re gonna be like his grandpa anyway, whether you like it or not,” Spencer chuckled.

You walked in to the two of them making funny faces at Alex, Alex deadpanning back at them.

“It’s like he’s wondering what the heck is wrong with the two of you,” you laughed.

“Hey, there’s mommy,” Rossi said, turning Alex’s carrier in your direction so he could see you.

Immediately Alex began kicking his legs.

“Hey babe, how’d you sleep? Do you feel better?”

Spencer pulled you close, wrapping an arm around your waist.

“Much better. Thank you for letting me crash on the couch.”

“No problem. Alex and I had quite the afternoon,” Spencer smiled, rocking the carrier gently.

“I never thought I’d see Spencer working a case while wearing a baby,” Rossi said.

“Oh no, you guys got a case? Why didn’t you wake me?”

You felt bad, afraid that you and Alex had gotten in the way.

“Emily wouldn’t let him,” Rossi supplied, “Besides Alex was a complete angel. He was sleeping like it was his job.”

“Thank you guys so much for helping out today.”

You gave Rossi a hug then grabbed the diaper bag, reaching to pick up Alex’s carrier.

“I got him.”

Spencer picked up the baby carrier, following you out of Rossi’s office and down the stairs into the bullpen.

“Well today didn’t turn out like I expected it would,” you noted.

“It was definitely interesting,” Spencer agreed.

“Well I guess I found the best way to cure cabin fever.”

“Yeah?” Spencer turned to you as you walked out of the unit, “What’s that?”

“Joining the BAU for the day.”

Spencer chuckled and looked down at Alex.

“Come on buddy, let’s go home. I think you’ve had quite the long day.”

You smiled as the elevator doors closed behind you. You were already looking forward to spending the evening with your two favorite boys in the world.

Tag List: @dreatine​ @reid-187​ @groovyreid​ @reidslibra​ @suvikamahes98blr​ @fuckthealarm​ @whatspunispun​ @iamburdened​ @cindywayne​ @thomasfoockinshelby​ @tinyminy88​ @theitcaramelchick​ @missprettyboy​ @hushlilbabydoll​ @sammy-jo1977​ @theonlyone-meeeee​ @haileymorelikestupid​ @lemonypink​ @multifandommandy​

#spencer reid #dr spencer reid #spencer reid gifs #Spencer Reid fic #spencer reid smut #spencer reid fluff #daddy spencer #dr spencer reid fic #dr spencer reid gifs #dr spencer reid smut #dr spencer reid fluff #Criminal Minds #criminal minds gifs #criminal minds fic #criminal minds smut #criminal minds fluff #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you

[junetuesday]

sweetener - [seventeen]

The Match

Pairing: Tom Holland x Female Reader - uni AU

Word Count:  8905ish

Warnings: a sprinkling of smut and a healthy helping of whump (hospital setting, description of injuries) 

A/N: for the anon who asked if they were going to leave the bedroom, this one’s for you (im jk this was planned from the start lmao) pls dont hurt me love you all!!! [not properly proofread bc im tired whoops]

Updates: ??????

As soon as you pressed the home button on your phone you immediately regretted it, fumbling to turn your phone over to stop the light of the screen burning your retinas off. One eye screwed shut, you carefully tilted the device so you could peep at the time without blinding yourself and lighting up the entire room.

3:47

Ahhh, lovely.

Despite the fact that you’d gone to sleep relatively early, just getting up after Tom’s nap and making dinner before getting ready for bed again, you still weren’t ready to wake up just yet, so it was a great relief to see that you still had hours left to sleep before you had to get up for Tom’s rugby match that afternoon. You could tell it was still early anyway, judging by the light coming in around the curtains; still an artificial yellow from the streetlamp outside Tom’s bedroom window.

You sighed as you snuggled back under the covers, turning over onto your right side to face Tom. You could just about see him in the half-light, the outline of his left shoulder and the back of his hair all messed up as he lay with his back to you, still asleep. You couldn’t quite make out the writing on the back of his t-shirt but you knew what it said anyway, because you had the same one at home. It was from Carnage last year - a bar crawl where the t shirt served as your entry to several bars and clubs (most of which you wouldn’t end up actually going to because you had to be in the last club by 1 and you always seemed to get distracted in the first few places). The date and theme was printed on the back of the t shirt, along with a list of bars and innuendo-laden “tasks” to be ticked off throughout the night. You’d seen last night when he got changed for bed that Tom’s didn’t have anything ticked off, but it did have several penises in various colours and sizes drawn on it in permanent marker. It wasn’t particularly tasteful, but some of them were remarkably detailed, so you had to give the artist(s) some credit. You’d wondered aloud whether you’d ever been in the same bar at the same time without knowing it, and Tom had pointed out that you must have been in the union at the same time loads of times before you met. That was probably true, and you said that it was highly likely you had bumped into each other, or been in the queue for food at the same time or something like that without actually speaking, to which Tom said no, because he’d have remembered you if he saw you. You didn’t think that was strictly true, but it was sweet all the same.

Right now though, you had forgotten all about the annotations on his t shirt, so you wiggled closer to his sleeping form, the warmth of his body drawing you in. Not wanting to wake him, you carefully scooted in behind him, draping your arm around his middle and curling your other arm up between your chest and his back, warming it up nicely after its excursion over the edge of the bed to check your phone. Tom didn’t move at first, but after a moment you felt him shifting, his hand coming to rest on your forearm across his waist. He just hummed sleepily, not really awake, relaxing back into your embrace. You hummed back, pressing a kiss to his shoulder and letting your eyes drift shut again.

You weren’t sure if you properly went back to sleep or if you were just kind of floating in the space in between asleep and awake - either way you were warm and safe and snuggled, and you didn’t have to get up for hours yet, so who cared if you didn’t go right back to sleep straight away - but after a while you felt Tom moving again, turning over to face you. Keeping your arm around his waist, you shuffled back to give him space to roll over, tucking yourself back into his chest as soon as you could. His arms wrapped around your body, holding you close with your face pressed to his chest. You breathed in deeply, taking in the warm, sleepy smell emanating from him.

“Hello,” he mumbled, his voice deep and raspy with sleep.

You just hummed back, sighing contentedly as you felt him kiss the top of your head. You would have happily stayed like that, cocooned under the duvet and Tom’s arms, just on the verge of sleep - only it was kind of hard to breathe with your face smushed against his chest. You tried to turn your face to the side, but with Tom’s arm on one side and the bed on the other there wasn’t really space.

“....I can’t breathe.”

Tom chuckled sleepily, his arms loosening their grip on you so you could move back enough to give you space to breathe. He yawned as you lay your head on the pillow beside his - which made you yawn too, which made you both smile tiredly. Even in the low light, even at gone four in the morning, he looked extremely cute, with tired eyes and messy hair and the faintest of smiles tugging at his lips. Your face so close to his, you barely had to tilt your head to kiss him, your lips capturing his in a soft kiss.

One kiss turned to two, to three, each as soft and gentle as the last, as though if you didn’t put too much into it then maybe you could still stay half asleep - and to be fair, it kind of worked. Your arm snaked around his neck as he shifted on top of you, your other hand lazily squeezing his bum through his pyjama bottoms. Neither of you spoke, just fumbling hands and languid kisses as only the parts of you that were absolutely necessary slowly stirred to life.

Before long both of your pyjama bottoms were lost in the sheets, your bodies slotting together effortlessly as Tom pushed into you. Your moans were low, raspy; your voice not ready to be used at this early hour as he thrust in and out of you, slowly and deeply. You wrapped your arms around him, hands splayed across his shoulder blades, as he pressed lazy kisses to your neck. You still weren’t really awake, all you were aware of was him, on you, around you, in you. It wasn’t even about getting off, it was just about being close to him, in the silence of the early morning, as if there was no one else in the world except you and him. Only soft moans and heavy breaths passed between you, his mouth hot on your neck and your legs wrapped around him, your heels pushing him to go deeper inside you.

You felt him grunt against your neck before he moved to kiss your lips, his warm breath tingling across your skin before your lips connected. His back and shoulders began to tense under your palms, and you felt his body stiffen on top of yours as his thrusts started to quicken. He pulled back from the kiss then, resting his forehead against yours so when you looked up at him all you could see make out was his eyes tight shut and his nose pinching, his face twitching slightly as he took those last few steps over the edge. You felt his laboured breath fan across your face as he released inside you, a groan that was as heavy with tiredness as it was pleasure. Slowly grinding deep inside you with small, idle movements, Tom buried his face in the crook of your neck as he caught his breath. You rubbed his back gently in a similar rhythm, the fingers of your right hand weaving through the curls at the back of his neck.

You weren’t too fussed about your own release, you could honestly have gone back to sleep then and there - plus you were pretty confident that Tom would even the stakes at some point in the day, whether that was before or after the match, or later than night when you got home after the post-match night out. You only wished you’d had the foresight to use a condom, so that way you could just pop it in the bin and save the clean up for later - but alas, you did not.

“I really don’t wanna get up,” you whispered against Tom’s shoulder.

“Don’t then,” he murmured back, voice muffled by your skin.

“I kinda need to…”

There was a pause, and then Tom simply said:

“No.”

“Um… what?”

With a tired groan, Tom rolled off you and sat up, taking off his t shirt and holding it out for you to take.

“Just use that and sort it out later.”

Hm. Did you want to use his penis-decorated bar crawl t shirt to clean his come off your inner thighs? No. But did you want to get up and go upstairs to the bathroom right this second? Also no.

“... yeah, okay, fine.”

T shirt tossed in the general direction of Tom’s laundry basket, the two of you were soon sound asleep once again. When you awoke several hours later, you were not much more inclined to get up than you had been at four, especially once you heard the wind and rain lashing against the windows. But, Tom’s stomach was rumbling, and you needed to pee, so you forced yourselves to push back the covers and find some clothes to throw on so you could properly start your day.

You joined Tom in the kitchen once you’d freshened up, pleasantly surprised to find him making coffee for you, himself, and Harrison, who was currently rummaging through a cupboard.

“I’m assuming you don’t want chocolate protein porridge?” Tom said as he handed you your mug.

“What even is that?”

“Porridge with chocolate protein powder in,” Harrison answered for him, having seemingly found what he was looking for in the cupboard - which, funnily enough, was chocolate protein powder.

“Oh, um, nah I think I’m good with toast.”

“Toast it is.”

While Tom set about making you toast and Harrison started making porridge for him and Tom, you tried to find a spot to stand in the kitchen where you wouldn’t be in the way of the two boys but that was also far enough away from the back door that you weren’t going to freeze from the wind whistling around its edges. Eventually you settled on hovering in the door to the hallway, leaning against the doorframe and taking a sip of your coffee. It was just a touch too hot to drink yet, but even with your now burnt tongue you could taste something different about it.

“...is there vanilla in this?”

“Hm, what?” Tom glanced over at you from where he was getting out a plate for you. “Oh yeah, I got a thing of syrup from work.”

You followed his vague gesture over to the corner where the kettle sat on the counter, surrounded by pots filled with tea, coffee and sugar, a plate with old tea bags and spoons on that you wondered if they ever actually cleaned or if they just threw the tea bags in the bin every now and then, and the newest addition: a large pump bottle of vanilla syrup.

“Oh sweet, thanks.”

Tom just smiled at you in reply, leaning against the counter while he waited for the toaster to pop, talking to Harrison about the match that afternoon and sipping on his own coffee. They talked about tactics and other members of the team that you knew nothing about, so you just stood and listened as they chatted. Harrison was remarkably animated for someone who’d just woken up - though you supposed maybe he hadn’t just gotten up, but you had and he was being very loud and it was a bit much for you.

Perhaps, though, it was less about the fact that he was very chatty - he was always very chatty, after all - and more about the fact that you were still annoyed with him about the situation with Liv, so everything he did got on your nerves. Not loads, you still considered him a friend, and sometimes you would forget about it altogether, but then you’d remember ‘oh right, I’m angry at you’ and he’d start to bother you again. It was more out of principle than anything - Liv was your best friend, so Girl Code stated that you had to hate whoever she hated, especially exes (were they even exes? Ex-ish-es??? You weren’t sure, but the point still stood). Still, he was also your boyfriend’s best friend and housemate, so you had to be civil if nothing else.

“So are you nervous to play?” you asked them both as you moved into the living room to eat, you and Tom on one sofa and Harrison on the other.

“Nah,” Tom shrugged as Harrison shook his head, his mouth too full to speak. “More excited, like it’s been ages since we played properly.”

“Yeah, should be fun,” Harrison said thickly in between spoonfuls.

“That’s good. Does it make a difference that it’s raining?”

All three of you glanced over at the living room window, watching the rain pelting against the glass.

“Kinda,” Tom said, “makes everything more slippery I guess like it’s harder to keep your grip on the ball and stuff but obviously it affects the other team too so it kinda balances out.”

“Makes sense,” you nodded, thinking about how you weren’t looking forward to going out in the rain at all, never mind running around in it for eighty minutes. “Is it covered? Like where I’ll be standing?”

“Nope,” Harrison shook his head, popping the p sound.

“Sorry. Bring an umbrella.”

You scowled at Tom jokingly, taking an overly aggressive bite of your toast. “Fine - I’ll ask Madison to bring one with her.”

Madison had graciously agreed to come watch the match with you, so you wouldn’t be stood there by yourself. Of course, she’d said yes before this torrential downpour began, but a promise was a promise so there was no going back now.

“Oh, is she coming too?” Harrison asked.

“Mmhmm,” you nodded.

“Cool - what about Liv?”

???

“Erm, no, I don’t think so…”

“Oh, okay.” He paused, taking a gulp of his coffee. “She alright? Haven’t heard from her in a while.”

??????

You chewed on your toast slowly, considering how to respond to that.

“What do you mean?”

“I text her like a week ago and she hasn’t replied?”

Uhhhhhhhhhhhh yes, and???

“Do you really have no idea why she might not have text you back?”

You could almost see the cogs turning in Harrison’s brain as he thought for a moment, then shook his head. “No?” He looked at Tom, who promptly became very interested in his breakfast and wouldn’t make eye contact with either of you.

“Right.” You set your empty plate down on the coffee table, holding your mug in both hands as you sat cross-legged on the sofa. “Friday before last, what happened?”

Harrison looked at Tom again, but he was still hyperfocused on his porridge, so he just shrugged. “I dunno?”

“Refreshers week.”

…

“The night you all came to pres at mine and we played Jenga.”

“Oh yeah, yeah, that night. What about it?”

Was he just playing dumb? Was he just dumb, like as a person??

“You didn’t, I don’t know, get with anyone?”

“Uhh…. yes? Did I?” He looked off into space as he thought about it, then nodded. “Yeah, no, I did.”

You just looked at him, waiting for him to connect the dots.

“...so?”

“What do you mean, ‘so?’?!” You felt a bit bad about how harsh that came out, because he did seem genuinely confused, but still - ‘so?’? Come on, man.

“What’s that got to do with Liv not texting me back? Wait, how do you know -- oh, did she see?”

“...yes,” you sighed, exasperated but pleased you seemed to be finally getting somewhere.

“Oh. That’s awkward.”

“Yeah.” No shit.

“But we’re not like, together or “exclusive” or anything?” he frowned, doing air quotes with one hand when he said exclusive.

Ah, so Mads was right. As usual.

“...I don’t think Liv knew that.”

“Oh. Oh.”

“Yeah,” you said plainly, not sure what to say next. It was your turn to look at Tom for assistance this time, but he was still resolutely Eating Breakfast and Not Looking. At least he’s consistent, you supposed.

“Should I like- should I call her?”

“Honestly, I wouldn’t.”

“Fuck,” Harrison groaned, and you almost felt sorry for him in a weird way. “I didn’t think- I didn’t know she thought-”

“Yeah,” you sighed, “I thought that might be the case.”

“Can you like, apologise to her for me then? If you don’t think I should speak to her?”

“Yeah, sure.” You’d have to think long and hard about how to approach that particular conversation, but it was only fair.

“Thanks.”

The atmosphere in the living room was a little tense for the rest of the time it took for the boys to finish eating, and you kind of wanted to make an excuse to leave and start getting ready, but fortunately Harrison inhaled the rest of his breakfast and went off upstairs to shower, leaving you alone with Tom - who quickly regained his ability to look people in the eye once he’d left.

Once you and Tom were finished eating, you tidied up the kitchen a little - it only seemed fair for you to do the dishes seeing as Tom had made you breakfast - while you waited for the bathroom to be free. By the time you had showered (together, and you were right, Tom did repay you for earlier - several times over, infact) it was time for the three of you to go on campus for the match. You parted ways once you arrived, the two boys going to warm up and you going to meet Madison for a coffee to pass the time before kick-off.

By the time you’d finished filling her in on what Harrison had said about Liv, it was time to make your way over to the playing fields, hot chocolates in hand to keep you warm. There were quite a few people there to watch, more than you expected, huddled under umbrellas around the perimeter of the pitch. It was still pouring rain, pelting down in icy sheets, making you extremely glad you were wrapped up in a jumper, coat, and oversized scarf, rather than in black shorts and a tight red t shirt like Tom and the rest of his teammates were.

You saw him looking around as he walked out onto the pitch, raising a hand to wave at you once he spotted you in the crowd. You couldn’t really wave back with your drink in one hand and umbrella in the other, but you lifted your cup and smiled widely instead which was close enough.

The game soon got under way, and as predicted you didn’t really know what was going on most of the time, but that was okay. The atmosphere was fun despite the horrid weather, and you were mostly just watching Tom anyway. He was in his element out there; him, Harrison and another guy you guessed was the captain directing the rest of the team a lot of the time. You were pleased to see that, as promised, he didn’t really get in the middle of the scrums, and he didn’t seem to get tackled that much either. A few times you thought he was about to get bowled over by someone, but then one of his own team managed to head them off just in time - which was all good, really, considering he was quite a bit smaller than most of the other players. Not that he wasn’t well built - he was, and as expected you did enjoy watching him running about in his little shorts - but some of the other players were huge, almost as broad as they were tall, so you didn’t like to think what would happen if one of them were to barrel into him.

Luckily, the upside of being smaller was that Tom was considerably faster, which meant he could dodge any tackles that his teammates failed to protect him from. That seemed to be the set up, as far as you could work out - the bigger players protected the smaller ones so that they could nip in and get the ball where it needed to be.

By the time the first half was coming to a close the scoreline was even at 15 all, and every single player on the pitch was caked in mud. Only small sections of the grass remained green, the majority of the field turned to a sludgy brown mess.

From your spot near the goal line, you couldn’t really see what was going on as the players set up for a scrum at the opposite side and end of the pitch. A scrum, as far as you remembered from what Tom had told you, was used to restart the game after a stoppage, like if someone had broken a rule or the ball had become “unplayable” (whatever that meant). You just recognised it as the thing that Ross got stuck in upside down in that one episode of Friends, that looked like a pretty good way to get your neck broken. Thankfully, Tom didn’t actually engage in the scrum, he just hovered at the back and when the ball emerged from underneath the mass of bodies he’d grab it, pass it to Harrison, and then he would kick it off somewhere else (well, either them or their opposing counterparts, but ideally it would be them).

You craned your neck as the ball was thrown into the middle of the two teams, shouts erupting from the players as they slammed into each other in an attempt to gain possession of the ball. After a moment you saw someone in red peel off from the back of the group, ball in hand.

“Is that Tom?” you said to Madison, standing on your tiptoes to try and see better.

“I think so…” She trailed off as you watched him look around for someone to pass to, finding no one nearby.

“Oh!” You gasped as one of the opposition, an absolute unit in a blue jersey, appeared as if from nowhere, barrelling full speed towards Tom, who seemed to be slowing down. You held your breath as he got closer and closer, Tom nonthewiser as he continued to look around for a teammate in the right position. You couldn’t make out the words over the sounds of the crowd and the rain, but you heard a shout echo across the pitch, making Tom turn his head and look over his shoulder. Darting right, he changed course at the last second, and you breathed a sigh of relief as he cleared the reach of the opposing player, their hand just missing the back of his shirt as they reached out to tackle him. Tom sped up once more, putting distance between him and his assailant -- and then you couldn’t see him anymore. Maybe his foot slipped in the mud, maybe the other guy was closer than you realised, but all of a sudden he was on the ground, the other player tumbling on top of him. Players from both teams converged in on them, a boy in blue grabbing the ball and streaking back up towards your end of the pitch.

“Can you see him?” your voice was panicked, but Madison didn’t seem to even hear you. She, and most everyone else, was watching as the boy with the ball ran almost the full length of the pitch, dodging this way and that before throwing himself at the goal line and scoring a try.

As celebratory cheers and shouts of disappointment erupted on and off the pitch, you peered across at the few people still gathered around the spot where you last saw Tom. Harrison was there now, bringing his fingers up to his mouth and whistling to get the referee’s attention. You huffed, frustrated that you couldn’t see or hear what was going on. Was Tom hurt? Or were they contesting the tackle? Or the try? It would be easier if you understood the rules, sure, but more than anything you just wanted to be able to see.

The players dispersed as the referee jogged over, and at last you caught a glimpse of Tom. You watched as Harrison held out a hand to help him up, only for Tom to pull his hand back sharply as soon as he lifted his arm to take it. That doesn’t look good. Harrison swapped hands and pulled Tom to his feet by the other arm, the two of them and the referee moving off to the side of the pitch.

“Should I go over?” you turned to Madison, chewing nervously on your bottom lip.

You didn’t want to overreact - tackling made up a large portion of the game, so of course players were often knocked down. Sometimes they needed a moment, and then they’d get back into it without the game even stopping. But they’d called the referee over, which made you think it was more than that - and then you saw Harrison jog back onto the pitch, followed by another player off the bench, and your heart sank.

“Yeah,” Mads nodded, holding out her hand to take your empty cup. “Go.”

She followed behind as you turned and weaved your way through the crowd, away from the pitch so you could get around to the other side. Frankly it was extremely inconvenient that they were carrying on playing, because it would have been far quicker to dart across the field, but alas that was not possible. By the time you got all the way around, Tom was walking into the small building at the side of the pitch that housed the changing rooms, followed closely by a first aider.

“Tom!” you called out as you and Madison followed them inside, making to follow them into the changing room - only it wasn’t Tom who answered you, it was the first aider.

“Sorry, you can’t come in here.”

“Oh, but-” you began, before you were cut off by Tom’s voice from behind the first aider.

“It’s okay, she’s my girlfriend.”

In a different situation, you might have gone all smiley and silly because Tom just referred to you as his girlfriend - like, obviously you knew you were, but hearing him say it to someone else was different, and especially when it was in a “so therefore she can do whatever she wants” kinda way. However, given the circumstances and the fact that you just wanted to know what the hell was going on, you just did a small, polite smile as if to say ‘please let me in, I'll be very well behaved’.

“Fine, whatever”, the first aider shrugged, turning around and following Tom into the changing room.

“I’ll wait here,” Mads called as you went in after them, stepping back to wait in the corridor.

Tom sat down gingerly on one of the benches in the middle of the room, holding his left elbow as if he was supporting the weight of his arm. He was soaking wet and covered in mud, his face flushed and brow furrowed, his jaw tense. He was breathing heavily, and you didn’t know if that was because he’d been running around for half an hour or because he was in pain - you suspected it might be a bit of both.

You stood off to the side, not wanting to be in the way as the first aider crouched down in front of Tom, setting his bag down between his feet .

“Is it your arm or your shoulder that hurts?” he asked as he searched through the bag.

“Shoulder,” Tom grunted.

The first aider took out an instant ice pack from his bag, bending and shaking it to activate the chemicals inside to make it cold as he got to his feet.

“Okay - stand up and put your arms down at your sides for me.”

Tom looked at him for a second with an expression that clearly said ‘absolutely not, please fuck off’, but he did as he was asked, letting out a slow, jagged breath as he lowered his arms to his sides. Even you could see from where you were standing that his left shoulder was sitting lower than his right, as though the weight of his arm was pulling it down.

“Can you raise your arms towards me?”

He lifted his arms slightly, his face scrunching up in pain almost immediately.

“Hurts,” he murmured through gritted teeth.

“And if you lift them out to the sides, does that hurt?”

Tom tried to lift his arms again, but again he groaned and clenched his jaw after just a few inches.

“Yup,” he nodded, lowering his arms. “Can confirm that hurts.”

“Okay, you can sit down,” the first aider gestured to the bench, handing Tom the ice pack once he sat down. “I’m just gonna have a feel of your shoulder, alright?”

You felt so useless just standing there, watching, and you really wanted to shout out stop, stop! because it was clearly painful to touch. Tom’s face was scrunched up again, his nostrils flaring as he took deep breaths in and out, but after a moment he opened one eye and looked over at you, chuckling weakly. You tried to smile back, but it felt all tight and forced, so instead you nibbled on your bottom lip anxiously.

“Okay,” the first aider stepped back after what felt like forever, taking the ice pack and putting it across Tom’s shoulder. “Can you hold that?”

“Erm,” Tom glanced at his shoulder, then down at his elbow, as if he didn’t want to stop supporting his arm to take the ice pack.

“I got it.”

You dropped your umbrella on the ground, moving over and sitting on the bench next to him. Tom gave you a small but grateful smile as you held the ice pack against his shoulder, careful not to apply too much pressure.

“So you’re gonna have to go for an x-ray I’m afraid. Could be a broken collarbone, dislocated shoulder, separated shoulder - hard to say which but there’s a fair bit of swelling already.”

“Fuuuck,” Tom groaned, his head dropping for a moment before he looked back up at the first aider again. “Right, okay.”

“Keep the ice on it until you get seen but take a break every twenty minutes, half an hour.”

You both nodded - icing was your responsibility now, you’d decided.

“Do you have someone to take you to the hospital?”

“Oh, uh-”

“I can drive you!” said a voice from outside the door, and you remembered that Madison was still waiting in the corridor.

You both laughed at her disembodied, albeit helpful, voice, though your smile quickly faded when Tom winced in pain with the movement.

“Cheers,” he sniffed, nodding to the first aider.

“No worries. Right, you guys better get going.”

That was a very good point, you realised, because the first half would surely have finished by now, which meant the rest of the team would soon descend on the changing room.

Taking the ice pack from you and holding it in his left hand, Tom showed you which of the lockers lining the walls was his so you could grab his bag for him before you made your way out into the corridor where Madison was waiting. The building was essentially just a corridor with a door onto the pitch on one end and a door to the carpark at the other, a changing room for the home team and one for the away team on either side.

“I’ll go get my car,” Mads said. “Meet you outside?”

“Cool, thanks.”

You and Tom moved away from the door to the pitch as players started streaming in, the thump of their boots on the concrete floor and the chatter of their voices quickly filling the small space.

“You okay?” you murmured, loud enough for Tom to hear over the noise of the two teams.

“Mmhm, yeah.”

He nodded, but everything about him was tense, his arm folded across his ribs as he held on tightly to his elbow to stop the weight of his arm pulling on his shoulder. You desperately wanted to give him a massive hug, but a) that would probably just hurt him and b) his team mates were right there.

In groups of twos and threes they stopped on their way into the changing room to ask what happened, to see if he was okay.

“Yeah, m’fine, fucked up my shoulder so m’gonna go get it checked out. My foot slipped in the mud, I guess.”

He had to repeat himself a few times until he’d spoken to all his teammates and his coach, but most of their responses were the same, variations on ‘ah shit’, ‘good luck’ and ‘let us know how you get on’, and eventually they’d all gone in, leaving the two of you alone in the corridor again. You moved closer to the door to the car park so you could see when Madison pulled up, setting Tom’s bag down next to the chair by the door. You still wanted to hug him, and though his teammates weren’t there anymore there was still the issue of hurting him if you tried, so you decided against it.

“So is that what happened?” you asked. “You just slipped?”

“Yeah,” Tom sighed as he slumped down into the chair. “He didn’t even touch me, I just, pfftt, decked it.”

“Oh but he landed on you, right?”

“Yeah he like, fell over me.”

“Oh.” you nodded, not sure what to say. “Want some water?”

Tom sighed again, then nodded. “Yeah, please - there should be a bottle in my bag.”

Propping his elbow up on the arm of the seat, Tom took the bottle from you with his other hand, pulling the stopper up with his teeth and taking a long drink. You watched as he downed the majority of the bottle in one go, slightly startled until you remembered that he’d played half a game of rugby, so yeah you’d probably be pretty thirsty too.

“Thanks,” he held the bottle out to you once he’d gulped down the last few drops.

“Do you want some more?” you asked as you took it from him, looking around for a water fountain or something to refill the bottle.

“Nah I’m good, thanks.”

“Okay,” you nodded, putting the bottle back in his bag. “Is it really sore?”

That was kind of a stupid question, but you didn’t really know what else to say.

“Yeah, it like, aches all the time and then when I move my arm I get a sort of shooting pain across here,” he explained, gesturing to his collarbone.

“Oh. Shit.”

Fantastic input, very helpful. Tom just sighed, nodding. You felt like you should say something else, something more comforting, but you didn’t really know what to say, so instead you just looked out of the glass section of the door to see if Madison was there yet - and thankfully, she was just pulling in.

You helped Tom into the car, which took longer than expected because at first he got into the passenger seat but then you realised the seatbelt would have to go across his left shoulder so he had to get out, go around the other side and get in the back, and then you had to help him put his seatbelt on, but you got there in the end, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek before you climbed out of the backseat and into the front so you could give Madison directions to the hospital. Neither of you knew where you were going, but you looked it up on your phone and thankfully it wasn’t too far away. The short journey was quiet; none of you really spoke, and every now and then you looked back at Tom, but each time he was just looking out of the window, holding his arm and looking tired.

“Thanks,” he said to Madison as he got out of the car once you arrived at the hospital. “Sorry if I got mud all over your car.”

“No worries - text me if you need me to pick you guys up later or anything.”

You nodded and thanked her too, taking Tom’s bag out of the backseat before she drove away - you’d decided it was easier if she just dropped you off, seeing as you thought you might be waiting a while.

It wasn’t too busy in the waiting room, but the receptionist who signed Tom in said it might take an hour or more before he got assessed, so the two of you settled in to wait - well, as settled as you could be on plastic hospital waiting room seats.

“Want me to get you anything?” You asked, looking around for signs of a cafe or somewhere to get food. “I think I saw a vending machine on the way in…”

“Nah,” Tom shook his head. “Just- no, thanks.”

“Okay,” you shrugged. “...are you warm enough?”

You felt like his mother asking him that, but frankly it was February and he was soaked through, wearing only shorts and a short sleeved top, and the ice pack wouldn’t have helped, and the waiting room wasn’t exactly toasty (though it was considerably warmer than it was outside).

“Erm… not really,” he admitted.

“You can use my scarf as a blanket if you want?”

Tom chuckled as you started to unwrap the large scarf around your neck, but shook his head. “I’ve got trackies in my bag, I think.”

Oh yeah, the clothes he wore to drive on campus. Duh.

“...okay yeah, that makes more sense.”

You found a toilet for him to change in, and were about to hand him his bag and go wait outside when he stopped you.

“I uh, I think you might have to help me.”

“Oh right, yeah, because you can’t use your arms.” Dummy.

The toilet was one big accessible stall, so at least you knew no one was going to come in, and technically it was gender neutral so you were allowed to be in there, but you still hoped no one saw you go in there with him. Not that you were doing anything wrong, in fact you were dressing him as opposed to undressing him (which admittedly felt a little strange to do), but still. Helping him change out of shorts and into sweatpants was easy enough, you just had to co-ordinate your movements so he didn’t fall over when you tried to get his foot through the cuffed bottoms, and thankfully his hoodie had a zip so all you had to do was support his left arm while he put the right sleeve on, and then you just left it open, the left side draped loosely over his shoulder.

“Thanks,” he muttered as you sat back down in the waiting room, carefully placing the ice pack back on his shoulder. “Sorry.”

“S’okay,” you shrugged, smiling to show you really didn’t mind. Was it a little awkward being eye level with his knob in a hospital bathroom? Yes, but sometimes these things happen.

“So, what’d you think of the match - before this, obviously.”

You laughed, shaking your head - the match seemed like hours ago now. “Yeah, it was good. Not a fan of this bit though.”

“Yeah, that’s fair,” he chuckled. “I’m not too big on it myself. Don’t think I’ll do this next time.”

“Does it still hurt as much?”

You surveyed him as he thought for a moment. His breathing was more normal now, and he wasn’t as red in the face, but his body was still tense, and every now and then his face would contort in pain, especially when he moved a certain way.

“Yeah,” he nodded, “Kinda more now, actually?”

“Makes sense, I guess, like adrenaline’s wearing off?”

“Yeah.”

Silence fell over the pair of you once more, and yet again you found yourself feeling like a bit of a spare part. You wanted to help him, to make him feel better, you just didn’t know how, and you didn’t like it.

“You sure you don’t want me to get you a drink, or some crisps or something?”

“No I’m fine,” Tom shook his head, turning to look at you. “Just- just stay here?”

His hair was starting to dry now, all curly and a little frizzy from the rain, he had dried mud on his cheek, and you were pretty sure he was pouting - all in all, it was a little inappropriate for him to be being cute at a time like this - but then again, when wasn’t he being cute? You didn’t have much choice, then, but to nod.

“Yeah. ‘course.”

You put your arm around the back of his chair, leaning back into your own to try and get comfortable. Tentatively at first, wary of hurting him, you began to fiddle with his hair, damp strands curling around your fingers. You looked at him out of the corner of your eye to make sure you weren’t accidentally leaning on his shoulder or anything, or if he looked uncomfortable with you playing with his hair in public, but all you saw was him closing his eyes and leaning his head into your hand, so you figured it was okay.

It was over an hour later when a nurse in green scrubs emerged from a side corridor, Tom’s file in hand, and called him in to be assessed. You hesitated, unsure of the protocol here - could you go in with him? Tom didn’t even pause, just got up and started walking towards the nurse, so you looked at them for clarification.

“Can I-”

“Yeah sure,” he nodded, “I don’t mind if you don’t?”

He looked at Tom, who didn’t seem to have even considered the possibility that you wouldn’t be coming in with him.

“What? Oh, yeah, she can come.”

“Okay, cool.”

You picked up your stuff and followed the two of them through the door, down a corridor with a series of examination bays separated by blue curtains. The studs on Tom’s boots clacked loudly against the floor as he walked, leaving a trail of mud and grass behind him.

“So,” the nurse said as he closed the curtain separating Tom’s bay from the rest of the ward. “My name’s Mike, I’m going to have a look at your shoulder and see what’s going on. Have a seat on the bed for me.”

‘Bed’ was a bit of a stretch, it was more like a padded table, but either way Tom climbed onto it while you stood aside out of the way.

“So, rugby tackle, right?”

“Yeah,” Tom started to nod, then stopped himself. “Well...yeah.”

Technically he had fallen over and the other guy fell on top of him but yeah, it amounted to the same thing. Mike asked him a lot of questions about how he fell and how he landed, where it hurt most, if he’d ever had an injury like this before, etcetera etcetera, while you stood and watched. It was only when the nurse asked if he could take his shirt off so he could examine him properly that Tom looked over at you.

“Can you give me a hand?”

“Mmhmm, sure.”

You nodded, going over to help. The hoodie was easy enough to take off, but his shirt posed more of an issue, especially because it was so bloody tight. It was tight anyway, but with the swelling of his shoulder it was even tighter now. You hesitated, unsure how best to proceed.

“Good arm out first,” Mike prompted, evidently seeing you struggling.

“Right...”

Between you and Tom you managed to get his right arm free, and then it was just a matter of getting it over his head before you could just slip it off his left arm. It was a struggle, but you managed it, muttering ‘sorry sorry sorry’ when he took a deep breath in, a strained ‘ouch’ coming from between his gritted teeth.

Shirt successfully removed, you stepped back to let Mike examine him. His shoulder was even more swollen now, and without his shirt on you could see a lump protruding from the point of his shoulder - overall his left side was just rather misshapen compared to the right. You thought at first that he had bruises dotted across the right side of his collar bone, but then you realised that no, those were not rugby injuries, those were put there by you, and at that point you kind of wanted to go out and see if you could get yourself hit by an ambulance. Thankfully, Mike seemed to catch on quicker than you did, so he didn’t bring them up, but he must have seen them, so you were still mildly mortified.

You watched as he had Tom move his arm in various directions to see what he could and couldn’t do, what hurt and what didn’t, and then have a good feel of the joint. Just like before with the first aider, you found it pretty unpleasant to watch, because it was clear that it all hurt, but thankfully it was over pretty quickly. The nurse reiterated what the first aider had said; that he’d need an x-ray to confirm whether there were any broken bones, and then they’d go from there.

Pulling the curtain shut behind him, Mike left you and Tom to wait some more, but at least this time you were alone and it was a bit warmer than in the waiting room. Plus Tom looked more comfortable on his “bed”, and there was a somewhat comfortable chair for you to sit in, so that was nice.

You helped him back into his hoodie so he wasn’t just sitting there topless, and you noticed then that there was more of your handiwork littering his abdomen, and you could only hope and pray that Mike hadn’t noticed them, because if he had then you definitely were going to have to go and see about that ambulance.

“Sorry,” you muttered as you draped Tom’s hoodie over his shoulder. “That’s embarrassing.”

“What?”

You gestured to his stomach, and then his neck.

“Those. And those.”

“Oh.”

He obviously couldn’t see the ones on his neck, but he could see the others, his face turning slightly pink as he repositioned his hoodie over his torso.

“Never mind.”

The second round of waiting wasn’t nearly as long, thankfully, and before long a porter came to take Tom for an x-ray on his shoulder. You didn’t go with him this time - they said you couldn’t go into the room anyway so there was no point - so you got out your phone instead. You had a few texts from Madison and Harrison asking for updates, so you replied to Mads first - you thought you should let Tom decide what he wanted to tell Haz. The rest of the time was spent trying not to google ‘broken shoulder’ and ‘broken collarbone’, and you were just about to crack when the curtain was pulled back sharply.

“...once the doctor’s had a look at your results they’ll be round to see you, alright?” the porter was saying as he opened the curtain.

“Okay, cheers.”

“Hey,” you got to your feet, standing beside the bed as Tom sat down on the edge of it once the curtain was pulled shut again. “How you feeling?”

“Yeah, m’okay.” He was still holding his elbow tightly though, and when he looked up at you you could see in his eyes that he just wanted to go home and get into bed and sleep for a week (though you would suggest he showered first because he was still very muddy). “Thank you.”

“For what?” you frowned, pushing a stray curl away from his face.

“Y’know-” he started to shrug but immediately flinched in pain, his face scrunching up in frustration. “Fuck’s sake-”

You chuckled sympathetically, pressing a gentle kiss to his crumpled forehead. “You sure you don’t want anything?”

“Nah - actually, could you pass me my phone?”

You rummaged through his bag again until you found the little inside pocket, pulling out his phone and passing it to him. He held it gingerly in his left hand, flicking through his notifications tiredly.

“Ah shit, I should speak to my mum, she’s text me asking how the match went.”

“Yeah you should probably tell her you’re in hospital, might be an idea.”

“Ugh,” he groaned, “I’ll just wait until I know if it’s broken or whatever.”

Broken or whatever. Like breaking your actual bones in your actual shoulder is no big deal. It was surprising how calm he was being about the whole thing - you thought that if it were you you’d definitely have cried at least twice by now. Maybe that was why you kept asking him if he was okay, or if he wanted anything, because you knew you would definitely not be okay. He insisted he was fine though, so all you could do was wait for the results of his x-ray to come back (you did kinda wish he would say he wanted a snack because you could do with one yourself, but you weren’t going to say that, so you kept quiet).

Eventually a doctor did come around, accompanied by Mike, the nurse who assessed Tom earlier, who was carrying a tray with various rolls of tape and bandages on .

“Good news,” the doctor began once she’d introduced herself. “There’s no break.”

Oh thank God.

“...you’ve got what’s known as an AC joint separation, or a separated shoulder.”

“Right. So is it like, dislocated?” Tom asked, looking between the doctor and Mike, who was setting the tray down on the side and putting on a pair of gloves.

“Not quite - so with a dislocation the bone pops out of the socket, whereas what you’ve done is you’ve basically damaged the ligaments that hold up the socket - the ones connecting your collarbone to your shoulder blade. Does that make sense?”

“Mmhmm,” Tom nodded, “I think so.”

“So,” the doctor continued, “because the bits holding your collarbone to your shoulder were essentially torn by the force of your fall, your collarbone can move up on its own - that’s what this bump here is.” She pointed to the lump on the point of Tom’s shoulder with her pen. “And obviously that means it’s not doing its job of supporting your arm, which is why you’re having to hold it like that.”

You just stood there, listening as she explained to Tom what the problem was and how they were going to fix it. She was doing a good job of explaining everything, which was nice - sometimes after seeing a doctor you left feeling more confused about what was wrong with you than when you went in. She explained how Mike was going to tape up Tom’s shoulder to support the joint, and that he’d have to wear a sling to support the weight of his arm, and that they would refer him for physio and give him painkillers and so on and so forth, but it wasn’t so severe that he’d need surgery, and he should heal up fine.

“...okay, thanks. How long- how long will it take - to heal?” he asked as the doctor went to leave.

“Depends, four to six weeks maybe?”

Ah.

Tom just nodded and thanked her again, and after that he said little else. He did what Mike told him to so that he could get him strapped up, but you could tell that he really just wanted to go home now. You were relieved to hear he had no broken bones, and that he wasn’t going to need surgery or anything, but hearing that it was going to take over a month to heal was evidently not what he wanted to hear.

The nurse gave him some more advice as he taped up his shoulder - that he’d need to go to see his GP and get it retaped in a few days, keep icing it etcetera etcetera - but you were the one who responded. By the time he left, saying someone would be back with a prescription for painkillers and then Tom could go home - you were running out of ways to say ‘okay, thanks, will do’.

“At least you can use your right hand now?” you said hopefully once Mike had left.

“Yeah, I guess,” Tom sighed, looking down at his sling-bound arm. It didn’t seem to bring him much comfort.

“...you gonna call your mum?”

He sighed again, then picked up his phone from the bed beside him. “Yeah.”

You gave him a sympathetic smile as he lifted the phone to his ear, clicking his tongue impatiently as he waited for his mum to answer.

“Hi mum. Yeah, I’m okay - how was the match? Um, well-”

⋘ SIXTEEN | EIGHTEEN ⋙

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#tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland fic #tom holland fanfic #tom holland imagine #tom holland blurb #tom holland headcanon #tom holland smut #tom holland fluff

[sxfterhearts]

healed

31. [12:19 pm]

➳ pairing: yugyeom x reader

➳ genre/warnings: slow burn, fluff, slight bad boy!yugyeom, triggers; mentions of past violence, injuries, physical abuse

➳ word count: 2,725 words

➳ summary: 31. “Don’t worry about me,”

➳ author's note: this is it, the final part of this series! i hope it doesn’t let you down 😭😭 i’d love to hear your thoughts on this series, what you liked/didn’t like, and whether you’d like future drabbles in this universe!! (i’m tempted, tbh) that’s all from me, please please enjoy, lovely readers 🥰 (credits to @jinyoungot7​ for this wonderful gif that kills me everytime)

wounded // scarred // healed

A deep inhale made you giddy with joy. The familiar, sweet scent of this morning’s light drizzle lingered in the air. Although the weather was a bit too humid for your liking, you gratefully savoured the smell that filled your lungs. For some reason, being outside in the aftermath of a downpour always brought you back to that wooden counter of your parents’ restaurant. You used to watch the rain blanket the outside world from the inside as you soaked and drowned yourself in your daydreams. You were a foolish teenager back then, uncertain of the paths you would take and anxious of the future. Getting your heart broken by the one and only Kim Yugyeom was just the icing on the cake.

It was fair to say that a lot had changed since then. In the span of three years, you graduated high school, moved out of that tiny neighbourhood in Namyangju, rented a small studio apartment in Seoul and became a proud Veterinary Science student of Seoul National University.

Yet, you couldn’t help but to admit that while you had progressed into the next chapter of your life, some things will always remain the same. Like how your best friend, Yeeun, never missed out on an opportunity to lecture you over the phone from the comforts of her Busan home. You lifted the device away from your ears to save them from further damage, just as the leash of the cream Pomeranian in your care, Daisy, tugged you forwards, towards a passing bicycle. You urged the dog away from the edge of the sidewalk with a solid ‘No’, which she thankfully obeyed.

“I can’t believe that you’re not doing anything special the week before uni reopens! I mean, hello, we’re going to be spending the next twelve weeks slaving away at our desks, don’t you want to do something fun?” Yeeun shrieked in disbelief. You could imagine her shaking her head at you with that resigned look on her face, the one that signalled she had already given up trying to change your mind.

“Here, girl.” You whispered as softly as you could, trying to grab Daisy’s attention and guide her back to the adoption centre-cum-café, her temporary home. “This is fun and special, Eun. You of all people should know just how special it is to help out these cute furry little babies!”

“More like furry little rascals.” She muttered under her breath. “Come on, Y/N. I get that you’re really passionate about animals and all but just think about it – you’ll be facing these creatures for the rest of your life. You should really try something new once in a while. You know, go drinking or clubbing like a normal uni student. Besides, didn’t you just visit the centre last month for your birthday?”

She was right. You did make the one-hour trip to the adoption café on the morning of your birthday. Ever since that birthday three years ago, you always made it a point to celebrate by being in the presence of a furry companion. Taking care of another living creature, going on walks with them and picking up after them helped you to take your mind off that painful sixteenth birthday when you found out he was leaving. It became your annual ritual.

You cleared your throat, trying to get rid of the small lump triggered by those memories. “Yeah, yeah I did. I… Did I tell you about the dog that I took care of that day?”

Yeeun took a large bite of her favourite takeaway noodles before letting out a muffled “No, what about it?”

“He was… Well, he was a tiny black Pomeranian puppy, not more than four months old. He was cheerful and energetic, couldn’t wait to go on his walk.” You smiled sadly at the thought.

“Yeah…? And?”

“He reminded me so much of Charcoal. You know, the black puppy from your mum’s shelter? I walked Charcoal with him three years ago.”

“Oh, him.” Yeeun grumbled at the mention of Yugyeom.

You ignored the obvious disapproval in her tone. “Yeah, the thing is I really, really, really liked this puppy, and I was even thinking about adopting him for good. I got everything set up in my place, got the pee mats, the dog food, everything, but I came in this morning and he was gone.”

Yeeun hummed over the phone. “I’m sorry, honey. Maybe you and the puppy just weren’t meant to be.” She said, trying her best to comfort you about the adoption that fell through. “Do you still think of him? Kim Yugyeom?” Yeeun asked gently.

You sighed, catching a brief glimpse of your reflection on the windows of a cold noodle restaurant a few doors down from the adoption centre. To this day, you couldn’t enjoy a bowl of naengmyeon without your mind wandering to the boy. “Not often. Honestly, Eun, every time I think I’ve forgotten him, I’ll see something that reminds me of him and he’ll just creep back into my head.”

“You know what they always say, darling. You never really forget your first love.”

You mulled over her words as you rounded the corner towards the adoption centre, Daisy trotting a few paces in front of you. “I wouldn’t call it love, per se, it’s just-”

“Wait, hold that thought,” She interrupted. “I’m sorry honey, the boyfriend is at the door. Do you mind if we continue this later?”

“Yeah, sure, I need to go too.” You stood at the entrance of the centre, reluctant to go in and part ways with Daisy. The dog came to a rest by your feet, huddling close. “Thanks for calling and reminding me of my poor life choices!” You said, full of sarcasm.

“Hey, that’s my duty as your best friend, don’t mention it.” She chuckled. “Oh, and Y/N?”

“Yeah?”

“Remember what I said. Go live a little, okay? You’ve already wasted too much time on Kim Yugyeom.”

“Yeah, I will.” You mumbled, agreeing with her words. “Go enjoy yourself with the boyfriend. Not too much though, and spare me the details. Talk next time!”

The two of you bid each other farewell and ended the call. Miraculously, talking to Yeeun made your chest a little lighter. Amongst countless other things, she had been there for you during Yugyeom’s abrupt departure and the initial stages of denial. She helped you draft, edit, and re-edit the numerous emails you sent to the boy, the only form of communication between you two for the first six months. She hugged you close and let you sulk on her shoulder when the emails suddenly stopped seven months after he left for Incheon. You were beyond grateful to have her as a voice of reason amongst your irrational thoughts; someone to walk with you hand in hand through the storms of life.

You made a mental note to ask your mother to send Yeeun a parcel of her prized kimchi as part of next month’s delivery. The girl never failed to mention how much she missed your parent’s cooking whenever the two of you talked on the phone.

All of a sudden, a high-pitched bark travelled across the street. You instinctively tightened your hold on Daisy’s leash, wary of the arrival of another canine. Cautiously, you watched as a four-legged, black ball of fur whizzed past the empty street, arriving before you and Daisy in a matter of seconds. As the dog grew closer and closer, recognition flashed across your mind as you noticed the dog’s distinctive white collar, a stark contrast to his coal black fur. The dog you intended to adopt this morning was wagging his tail and panting by your feet, letting out occasional playful barks at Daisy, his former neighbour. You bent down, arm reaching out to get a feel for his oh-so-soft fur–

“Dal!” A male voice, bright and awfully familiar, exclaimed between heavy breaths. “Dal, slow down, big boy! Daddy can’t…” The voice died down a notch, reducing to a whisper as its owner’s feet entered your line of sight. His entire body shaded your crouched figure from the afternoon sunshine that peeked through the clouds. “Catch up.”

A moment of silence ensued as your eyes panned upwards, scanning a pair of long legs covered in ripped jeans, then a yellow plaid shirt that was haphazardly tucked in, right up to the owner’s face. You couldn’t help the sharp gasp leaving your lips. 

Standing before you was none other than Kim Yugyeom himself. His features were more defined than ever, his wavy hair a silvery shade of platinum blonde and his ears adorned with a pair of silver hoop earrings. A single stainless-steel drop earring dangled from his earlobe, its bottom decorated with a half-crescent moon and a star. You stood there and stared at the boy you once knew, now a fine young man, just taking him in. You noticed the lack of cuts and scars on his unblemished, fully healed face. You spotted the beauty mark right under his right eye, standing out against his fair skin. You watched, mesmerised, as his lips twitched to form a slightly sheepish grin, while the tips of his ears burned and glowed into a striking shade of cherry red. Yugyeom’s eyes widened in mild surprise, his gaze lingering on your face for a few stretched out seconds before wandering away, then returning back.          

Him… It’s him… He’s here, in Seoul? But I thought he was supposed to be in Incheon, with Mark. What is he doing here? And how did he…? Your never-ending stream of thoughts swirled inside your head at an alarming rate, and you felt the onset of a splitting headache crawl up your temples.

“There you are, Y/N.” Yugyeom said finally, releasing a satisfied sigh and an airy laugh. He didn’t seem nearly half as surprised as you felt under these unlikely circumstances. In fact, you thought that the expression he wore on his face morphed into one of relief instead. “After so long, I finally found you.” He bent down to scoop the black puppy into his arms, leaving you utterly stunned. Before your mind could process the meaning behind his words, however, he suggested, “Let’s talk inside,”, gesturing towards the entrance of the adoption café. 

You gave him a meek nod, not daring to let out a sound on the off chance that you would stumble over your words and make a fool out of yourself. With the manners of a gentleman, Yugyeom held the door open for you and waited patiently as you ushered an excited Daisy into the café filled with her furry friends. He took confident, quick strides towards the barista standing behind the counter, much like the first time he had walked into your parents’ restaurant. The way he carried himself, with an air of calm coolness, had not changed at all. You followed closely behind, struggling to keep up with his bigger steps.

“Hello, noona.” He greeted the lady, friendly and warm. “Can I please get an Iced Choco and…?” Yugyeom turned to you expectantly.

“Uh…” You started, soft and uncertain. “A peach iced tea, please.”

“No longer a coffee addict, huh?” He teased, unable to contain his toothy smile. Yugyeom retrieved his wallet from his back pocket and held out his card to pay. It was then that you noticed, quite belatedly, the yellow Rilakuma plaster wrapped tightly around his left index finger.

Your mind began to race. You were unbelievably happy that even after three years, he still stuck to the same brand of bandages, but at the same time, fear and anxiety gnawed and scratched against your chest. All this time, was it still happening? You wondered silently. Surely… “What’s… What’s with your,” You gestured vaguely towards his appendages. “Your finger?” You squeaked.

“Ah,” Yugyeom glanced briefly towards the yellow plaster, paying it little to no mind. “Come, sit down first, okay?”

“No,” You replied with a firm tone that you rarely used. You were a little taken aback yourself. “I’ve spent the past three years worried sick about you. Don’t you at least owe me an explanation about your most recent injury?”

Yugyeom sensed your insistence and determination, knowing that there really was no use trying to convince you otherwise. “It’s nothing to worry about, Y/N, trust me, I’ll show-”

“I’ll be the judge of that. Let me see.”

“Look, it’s just a small cut, okay?” You raised an eyebrow at his description. From memory, his definition of a small cut was miles apart from yours. He took a step closer, hoping to persuade you. “Here,” Yugyeom peeled away the sticky fabric with little difficulty, revealing a thin slit that already closed up. “See? It’s tiny. I was cooking the other day and the knife just sort of slipped and nicked my finger. I told you, don’t worry about me.”

Still, you were unwilling to let him off the hook so easily. “Kim Yugyeom? Cooking? Are you sure that’s safe?”

“Perhaps not the safest…” He admitted with an embarrassed rub of his neck, leading you towards an empty table by the windows. “I just really, really missed your mother’s food. Her naengmyeon especially. I’ve tasted every single naengmyeon in Incheon and Seoul and honestly, nothing comes close. I even tried to cook it myself but, well… You can guess how that turned out.”

“What made you think that your naengmyeon could be better than a restaurant’s?” You questioned jokingly, earning yourself a faked wince of pain from Yugyeom as he clutched the right side of his chest, the wrong side.

After that, it was like the words couldn’t stop flowing out of your mouths. He told you about how he caught a glimpse of your adoption papers during his interview for Dalkyum, the black puppy, and recognised your photo. He confessed that he was initially drawn to Dalkyum due to his sheer resemblance to Charcoal, to which you agreed wholeheartedly. He moved to Seoul late last year to study Fine Arts at the Korea National University of Arts, and you revealed that you were studying to become a vet. He explained how half a year after moving to Incheon, Mark had accidentally downloaded a virus onto their shared laptop while gaming, rendering it broken beyond repair. He didn’t write down your email address and thanks to his goldfish memory, he forgot the entire string of letters once Mark found a replacement.

It seemed like the more you talked to Yugyeom, the more you felt the icy shards of pain and sorrow around your heart melt away. Although, that could probably be because he was looking at you with the brightest of expressions, his mouth permanently fixed into a wide, million-watt smile.

“What do you think? Shall we start over?” You asked after a lull in the conversation, taking a sip of the soothing, saccharine liquid.

“No, I’d rather we pick up where we left off, but with a proper introduction.” He extended his arm for you to shake, which you did with a light scoff and an upturn of your lips. “Hello, my name is Kim, Yu, Gyeom. Kim for gold, Yu, which means to have, and Gyeom, as in humble or modest. It’s nice to meet you again, Y/N. You look beautiful today, as always. Did you know that? I can’t stop myself from being drawn to you, but I guess some things never change.”

“I… What…?” You sputtered hopelessly, reigniting the butterflies in your stomach. “Yugyeom, I’m literally in an old t-shirt and baggy shorts.”

“Doesn’t matter to me, Y/N.”

//

“There’s another thing that never changed, which unfortunately was also out of my control.”

“Oh no, what else, Kim?”

“I’m sorry to tell you this so late, Y/N, but sadly, you were and are my first love. And you see, the thing about first loves is that no matter how hard you try, you simply can’t-”

“Forget them.”

“Exactly. Trust me, I tried.”

“Yeah, I tried too, so hard. I guess you weren’t meant to be forgotten. Or I guess we weren’t meant to forget each other.”

“First loves stick with you like a scar that can never be fully healed.”

“Wow, look at you, Kim! I’m impressed, you’ve become so poetic.”

“From now on, I’ll only write poems for you.”

#kwritersworldnet #yugyeom fluff #got7 fluff #yugyeom fanfic #got7 fanfic #yugyeom scenarios #got7 scenarios #yugyeom drabbles #got7 drabbles #yugyeom imagines #got7 imagines #yugyeom timestamps #got7 timestamps #yugyeom soft #got7 soft #yugyeom #kim yugyeom #got7 #got7 yugyeom #got7 maknae #kpop fluff

[cevansfics]

Broken Glass part 1

Part 2

Paring: Chris Evans x Reader

Summary: You and Chris broke up recently, you try to covince yourself and your friends you're fine, but how do you really feel when you see him at a party unexpectedly?

Warnings: angst, mentions of alcohol and alcohol consumption

A/N: let me know what you think :), thinking about doing a part 2 also of you want to be tagged let me know :)

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Waking up to the sun beaming through the little gap in the curtains, you roll over to see the time. Already mid day. Stretching to try and wake yourself up, looking over to the side of the bed he used to occupy. It's been four month of waking up alone. You thought you would be used to it by now. Your mind drifts to some of those mornings, the surprises when you would make breakfast in bed, ones where you would wake up to him staring at you, first thing you hear is him telling you how beautiful you look. Or the cold mornings when the night before you fell asleep wrapped and tangled with each other only to wake the same way. God did you miss those days.

A banging on your door pulled you from your thoughts. Rushing to look presentable, you open it to see your two best friends smiling before pushing you out of the way to enter your apartment.

“Please, do come in,” you say after the fact sarcastically.

Claire rushed off towards your bathroom, quickly saying hi. “She's been moaning about needing to pee for about an hour, but you know what she’s like, won't use public restrooms.” Nina rolls her eyes explaining, before gesturing to what’s you are wearing, “Late start to the day?”

“Yeah, I slept in sue me.”

“So,” Claire made you jump reentering the room clapping her hands. “What’s the plan for this evening?”

“I haven’t asked her yet.” Nine explained, taking a sip from her drink you’d just given her

“Plans?” You asked cautiously, nothing ever good came from Claire’s ‘plans’

“Us three, tonight, party time.” She exclaimed excitedly

“I don’t really feel like going to a club.”

“Not a club. A friend of a friend got this big penthouse and is throwing a party.”

“A friend of a friend?” Eyeing her, that usually meant a friend of a guy she was sleeping with, but she just shrugged.

“Come on Y/N, you need to get back out there. Conquer the world,” Nina added.

“That’s the last thing I need. I love you guys but you know I’m not ready for that.” You’d lost count how many times you had this conversation with these two. You know they have your best interests at heart but you don't feel ready. Truth is you’re still not over him.

God. Even after all this time you still can't bring yourself to even say his name, but more times a day than you’d care to admit your mind wanders off, thinking of him. His smile, the way he looked at you when you were rambling on about something you were passionate about. The date nights. The nights out with friends. Him holding you close letting everyone know you were with him. When he would get a little tipsy and become even more handsy, even more so once you were alone. Holding you so close all you could feel was the warmth radiating off his body. The way his lips would trace along your….

“Y/N!” Nina was waving her hand in front of your face. “You zone out, where were you?”

“I-I was just thinking.” You feel the heat rush to your cheek, clearing your throat to shake off those thoughts.

Claire was rooting through your fridge looking for something to drink. “Let's make a promise to make tonight about us then, go to the party, drink a few and just have a good time just us girls. You know we haven’t done that in the longest time.” You have to admit she did make a good point. You’d all been working so much and haven’t seen each other as much as you use too. If tonight was just about you three having a good time and them not trying to hook you up with someone, maybe you could cope.

“Okay, I’m in.” They both jumped up and down like excited like school children.

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The rest of the afternoon was a blur. Claire had another great idea that they get ready for the night and come back to yours as your apartment was closest to where you were going. So they left to get clothes and overnight bags with everything they might need. You stayed home showered and quickly had something to eat. Before yo knew it you were in an Uber on your way to the party. Pulling up outside a fancy building already crowded with peoples. You began to wonder just who this ‘friend’ was who was hosting the party.

Swiftly you all made your way through the crowds into the elevator.

“Whos party is this exactly?” You know you asked before but you were more curious now with your surroundings.

“Some guy, Sebastian, I think.” She shrugged, pushing the button for the correct floor and the doors started to close.

Surely it couldn’t be that Sebastian. That’s a common enough name right?

The doors open to a giant room, filled with hundreds of people. Or at least it looked that way. Lights flashing, music thumping in your ears, you could barely hear your own thoughts never mind someone else. You feel a shove at your shoulder, its Claire holding three shots. How did she already have something to drink, you’d only been there about 3 minutes. Regardless you and Nina both took one. Claire held up her drink, it looked like she was making a speech, but you couldn’t hear a thing she was saying. Looking at Nina, she didn’t have a clue either, she just held up her own drink clinking it with Claire’s, so you did the same.

Several shots late, you were starting to feel a little heated and tipsy. Completely throwing caution to the wind all there of you were dancing, laughing and enjoying yourselves. You feel someone tapping you so you turned to see who it was.

It was Sebastian Stan. You hadnt seen him since before you and Chris broke up.

Chris.

Thats the first time you said his name, even if it was just in your head it had you feeling all sorts of things. The alcohol probably didnt help.

Sebastian pulled you into a tight hug. Automatically you hugged him back. Yes he was Chris’s friend but over the course of your relationship you had become friends with him too. Shouting in your ear, still you could barely hear him. He asked if you were okay, and apologised that he hasn't spoken to much since everything had happened.

Pulling away you were afraid to say anything. All sorts of emotions were building up inside of you. Your only response was giving him a thumbs up and a smile you hoped was believable. Must have been convincing enough because you gave you one more quick hug before moving on through the crowd.

Turning back to your friends Claire gives you an apologetic look, she seems to have put two and two together. Quickly glancing round, looking for a bathroom, you see some stairs and take off. Taking the stairs two at a time, heading down the hallway that seems to have less and less people as you walked down it. Finally reaching The bathroom. A rush of emotions hit you, it's like you couldn’t breathe. Pacing around the bathroom you start feeling dizzy, deciding to rest on the edge of the bath, trying to calm yourself down, slowly, taking deep breaths until your breathing is back to normal and the rooms no longer spinning. There’s a harsh knock in the door and someone calling your name. It’s Claire and Nina.

Opening the door you let them enter.

“I’m so sorry Y/N, I really didn’t realise it was his party.” Claire said quickly.

Taking a deep breath before you start talking, “I know, I know. It's fine really. I don't even know why I freak out so much it’s not even like I saw him. I guess just seeing Seb and knowing they are friends made all those feelings I thought I pushed away come right back up.”

“If you want to leave, we under-”

“No,” you cut her off. “I’m fine like I said I don't even really know what just happened. This night was for us, so let’s just go and enjoy ourselves.”

“Okay” they both say at the same time.

Heading back down stairs you all got another drink and went back to dancing. Hours must have passed, you were still going. You were genuinely enjoying yourself, just dancing with your girls. You saw Seb a couple more times as the night went on but you didn't see anyone else you knew.

Until.

Nina made a signal as though she was going to get another drink and Claire and you both nodded while dancing. Suddenly Claire grabbed your arm, you looked at her to see what was going on but she wasn’t looking at you, she was looking over your shoulder into the crowd of people. Following her eyeline to see what’s happening you see a group of men all laughing and shouting. The group parted and you saw him.

Chris.

The room seemed to go silent. There he was. Not quite right in front of you, but the other side of the room. Which quickly felt a lot smaller than it actually was. Everything was happening in slow motion. He just stood there, laughing and joking with his friends holding a beer, typical, god did he look good. You felt like you were staring at him an awfully long time but you didn’t care. Then he noticed you, but you still couldn’t look away. Now you were just two people in a crowded room starting at each other. From an outsider's perspective it probably looked a little weird. Then he did something, something you thought if you saw in person again it would break you. He smiled at you.

Do something, you kept repeating in your head over and over again.

Move. Smile. Look away. Anything, just stop staring.

You managed a little wave of your hand causing his smile to grow. He got pulled back into his conversation with his friends. That’s when everything came rushing back into focus. The room you were in, the people, the flashing lights, the thumping music. You wanted to leave, you needed to get out but you couldn’t move. Turning towards Claire, you grab her arm to keep you balanced before she pulls you in for a hug.

Tags:

@chris-butt

#chris evans #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans x reader #chris evans fanfic #my writing

[pinkbubbles-and-bigtroubles]

Little Surprises

Your husband Calum takes your daughter Lucy to pick out a puppy to foster, but things don’t go as planned.

This is pretty fluffy and there’s no smut (who am I???)

CW: strong language, mentions of depression, anxiety, alcohol, and pregnancy

"Hurry Daddy, hurry up before they close," Lucy, your four-year-old daughter, impatient as always, yelled from the back seat of Calum's Rover. 

"Just a second sweetpea, we have plenty of time," he replied over his shoulder as he walked with you back to the front door. You'd finally given in to Lucy's pleas to foster a dog during the lock down. Your daughter was intelligent, sociable, and bored out of her mind these past couple weeks. Her favorite, Uncle Michael, was helping to keep her occupied by playing animal crossing with her every day, but you limited her game time to one hour in the afternoon. So to help keep her occupied he showed her videos of the puppy they were fostering while stuck in the house. Once the idea was in her head there was no getting it out, and it didn't help that Calum thought it would teach her responsibility. With the two of them against you it was a miracle you held out a whole week.

 You hadn't been feeling well these past couple weeks and the idea of a puppy underfoot and needing taken care of was not something that appealed to you. Your husband managed to convince you by taking wonderful care of both his girls while you were all home together. He'd made up a schedule for Lucy that kept her out of your way so you could work until lunchtime when you traded off so he could promo his latest album. You'd started doing stretching and yoga together as a family before dinner for about a week now, and you could tell it was starting to pay off. Calum being home with nothing to do meant he'd been all over you every night and morning, and occasionally during nap time. You were loving it, but your back and hips were killing you. Still it was better than the first lockdown in 2020 when you hadn't been able to see each other for three months. He'd whisked you away to a beach cottage for a romantic weekend, and nine months later your daughter was born. 

 When the weather was nice they played in the backyard. Lucy adored her father, and anything did, she had to do.  She wanted to play soccer so Calum practiced with her running drills in the backyard and polishing up his own skills in the process. It was hard to concentrate on your laptop, and you caught yourself watching them instead of working. Part of you still marveled that this was your life, your family, and your husband. 

Had it really been just six years since the first night you'd met in a bar after a concert you'd both attended? You'd been so drunk you'd gasped and told him he looked just like "Calum Hood, the sexist fucking bass player in the world." Cal found that hilarious, but your boyfriend at the time very much did not. This led to a screaming match outside the club where he called you every name in the book and left you crying on the curb before taking a very expensive two-hour taxi ride home. In his anger he forgot you'd reserved a hotel room to avoid the drive after the show. You remembered the hotel but couldn't remember how to get there which made you cry harder.

Right then Calum came out for a smoke and found you a weepy, sloppy mess. After he'd calmed you down, he insisted on walking you back to your hotel. You thought it was right around the corner, but you got turned around and Calum ended up walking with you for almost thirty minutes before you found it. He insisted on having a female employee walk with y'all to your room before giving you a goodnight hug.

The next morning you'd been awoken by a pounding headache. You quickly downed three glasses of water and sat in the shower until the hot water ran out trying to piece together the previous night. You were convinced the handsome man was a figment of your imagination until you saw Calum Hood followed you on Instagram and Twitter. Opening your phone you found a new number saved as "The Real Calum Hood." 

You'd convinced yourself, after much yelling and multiple threats from your best friends, to take a once in a lifetime chance and go on a date with a bonafide rock star. You were convinced it would never work, but once Calum had his heart set, you never stood a chance.  You loved that man with a ferocity you hadn't known possible, and trusted him with your life, but if you ended up being the only one to clean up after this dog you were gonna kill him. 

*******

As Calum pulled out of the driveway he felt a twinge of guilt, he had every intention of getting you to change your mind about "fostering" a dog. He missed having a dog, Lucy was old enough, and it would teach her responsibility. He and Lucy had spent the past week getting ready for the puppy. They'd stocked up on supplies, watched videos about dog training

Growing up being shuffled between households, and always taking care of your siblings, you were never allowed to keep a pet. And while you craved the stability you found with Calum, Lucy and his family, you also panicked at the idea of being tied down. Two years ago, when you'd first married and bought this house, it took you several months to trust yourself to really decorate and make it your own. 

He smiled back at Lucy singing, "How Far I'll Go" at the top of her voice. You'd been hesitant to let her watch Disney movies, not wanting her to admire the pretty princess stereotype. Moana won you over, and your lock screen was still a picture of her and Calum as Moana and Maui for her very first trick or treat last fall. He loved you for giving him the greatest gift anyone could give. Even though Lucy was the spitting image of her aunt Mali the cleverness and quick wit that kept him on his toes was all you. 

This was a special trip so Lucy made sure to dress accordingly. She was going to wear her prettiest dress, but Calum had reminded her about how the dogs' paws could be dirty and scratch through the delicate fabric. After considering that she picked out her black and yellow Pokemon overalls paired with her child-size Doc Marten's, black like her dad's but with little multi-colored hearts. You'd pulled her dark curls into pigtails fastened with Pikachu hair bows. 

She was bouncing in her car seat as they pulled into the shelter.

"Puppy, puppy, puppy," she chanted as she unbuckled herself and he lifted her out of the car.

"Lucy Koa Hood if you take one more step away from this car," Calum warned his daughter, stopping her dead in her tracks before she bolted for the door. She looked up at him with those huge brown eyes, so much like his own, and grabbed his hand. She skipped towards the entrance pulling him along behind her.  

He'd already sent  the application and made an appointment so an employee was waiting to talk them back right away.

The sound and smell of dogs pricked at Calum's senses as they walked back towards the kennels. Lucy squeezed his hand tightly and he could feel a slight tremble. 

"Are you ok Lulu?" He was worried it was overwhelming for her and bent down to pick her up. 

She took a deep breath, puffed out her chest and looked him in the eye, and nodded. 

"I can walk Daddy. I'm a big girl," she told him, still clutching his hand. 

"Ok sweetpea, but if it gets too much let me know ok?" He reassured her, rubbing his thumb along the back of her tiny hand. 

Calum clicked a picture of Lucy's face as they brought in the puppy.  She had the biggest smile and her dark eyes were shining. She was so excited and was squirming and bouncing in her seat next to him. Cal stopped them from handing her the puppy until she could hold still. 

The puppy started wiggling as soon as they put him in Lucy's lap and began climbing up her chest, and licking her face. At first she giggled but she quickly got uncomfortable. She wanted to sit and pet him quietly. The little guy was energetic, rambunctious, in her face, and Calum could tell she didn't like it one bit. He scooped the pup out of her lap cradling it in his hands, gently holding him back so Lucy could reach in and pet him. The puppy let her pat his head a couple times before starting to gnaw on her fingers. 

Lucy snatched her hand back, crying out with surprise. Calum tried to explain to her that puppies were baby dogs and like babies they chewed on things and wiggled a lot, but Lucy outright refused to touch it again.

"No thank you, Daddy, I don't think that's the right one," she told him, crossing her arms across her chest. 

He handed the puppy back to the employee and asked to see the next one. Lucy's excitement had dimmed but it was still there when the employee brought back a pretty gold and white pup. He took her first, but this one was even more rowdy than the last one. Lucy clapped her hands and giggled watching the little gal attack Calum with much ferocity if very little coordination, but she refused to even try to pet it. 

"No thank you, I'll pass," Lucy politely declined and Calum was starting to wonder if they were going to leave with a dog after all.

"Ok we'll try one more," the employee told them smiling at Lucy who nodded and smiled back. 

"We don't have to get one today Lulu, it's ok to keep looking for a while," he reminded her.

"We just have to be patient, everything will work out," she tried to reassure him, speaking gently and patting his arm.

"Wonder where you got that from?" Calum snickered at your all too familiar phrase. 

The employee brought the final puppy in, and Calum felt hopeful when he saw the little fella was sleepy and not hyped up. Lucy was beaming and let them set the puppy in her lap. 

"Easy, easy" she whispered to herself and she stroked the brown and white fur. "See it's not so bad." She grinned at Calum looking both thrilled and relieved, but then her face twisted into a horrified look of shock. He was confused until the next second when she picked the puppy, still peeing, out of her lap holding it over the floor. 

The shelter worker grabbed the puppy, as Lucy burst into tears. Calum slid next to his daughter, putting his arm around her and curling her into his side. He kissed the top of her head over and over, rubbing her back, and murmuring "it's ok baby, it's ok," until she caught her breath again. 

They returned with a towel and helped get her dried off as best they could. Calum decided to call it a day and Lucy started sniffling all over again. He knelt down so he could talk to his daughter face to face.

"Don't cry sweetpea," he brushed the tears off her cheeks. "It just wasn't meant to be today, but they have our application on file. We'll make another appointment and come back. At least now we know a puppy might not be the best idea and we'll see what other options we have ok. Now if I know your mom she's got an outfit stashed for you in the car. We'll get you changed and go get ice cream ok?" 

She stood up still hiccuping and wiping her face. Calum went to pick her up but she shook her head and backed away. 

"No Daddy, I'm not scared, I'm just upset," she protested, still sniffling but fighting it back. " I wanna see the dogs when we leave." 

"Can we leave through the kennels?" Calum asked.

"Of course," the employee smiled down at Lucy. "I've got some stickers for you up front too. Just follow me." 

They led the back through a hallway and a set of double doors. The dogs went nuts when they saw them and Lucy stood back for a second. The shelter worker started to ask if she was ok but Calum held his hand up, motioning for them to wait. He watched his daughter squeeze her eyes shut and ball up her fists while taking deep breaths. Her lips were moving and he eased closer to hear what she was saying. 

"You're a big girl. You are smart. You are brave. You can do this." Lucy was repeating the words he'd heard your say to their daughter whenever her courage faltered. He felt a lump in his throat watching his little girl finding the inner strength you'd given her starting the day she took her first breath. 

She stuck her chin out and grabbed his hand, keeping close by his side as they walked. She gave a little wave as they passed the kennels.

"Bye doggies, bye doggies," she called out softly, her normal exuberance and energy tempered by the day's unfortunate events. Calum kept her hand in his as he chatted with the shelter employee. They told him they were a big fan of the band and played guitar from time to time. Cal started to offer to take a pic when he felt Lucy tugging at his hand. 

"C'mon sweetpea, we gotta get you changed. We'll come back another day," he told her. 

"Daddy wait a minute, I wanna see something," she pulled harder trying to get away.

"Next time Lulu, next time, I think you've had enough today," he pulled her along and she stumbled a bit making him stop. 

"My shoes need tied," she told him and he let go of her hand, ready to bend down to fix it.

Lucy turned on her heel and took off back towards the kennels. Doc Marten's don't make the best running shoes, but Calum was wearing his too. Not only that, she caught him off guard so she had already tumbled to a stop by the time he caught up. He saw her fall and was worried she hurt herself. He stopped when he saw her on her knees scooting towards one of the cages.

"Hi there, don't be scared" her voice was soft and soothing. Calum scanned the cage, finally spotting a small dog huddled in the corner. Golden colored fur shot through with silver and black with a pair of light blue eyes peering at their little group. 

"I'm Lucy, what's your name? Come say hi, I'm not scary like these big dogs," Lucy pat the top of her thighs trying to coax the dog over. 

"His name is Astro," Calum read the sign for her.

"And he's four years old, like me," Lucy told him pointing at the number above her head.

"No sweetpea, that's the cage number," Calum explained but the shelter employee broke in

"Actually Astro is four like you, but he's very shy and doesn't like most people," they informed her. 

"What's his story? What breed is that?" Calling was curious. Astro had at least turned to face them, ears forward listening to them. 

"Astro, Astro," Lucy called him. "Come here pretty boy." She tried whistling but she couldn't do it so she ended up spitting on herself.

"So Astro is 4, and there's definitely some corgi because he's got short little legs. Other than that our best guess is Australian Shepherd? His owner passed away maybe five, six months ago. Her daughter owns cats and the dog isn't very social so he ended up here. He's quiet so he rarely gets noticed," they quietly filled Calum in.

"Good with kids?" He asked.

"No clue, he keeps to himself and doesn't really deal with people." They shrugged, not knowing what to say. 

They stopped at the sound of a whimper. Astro was belly crawling incredibly slowly towards Lucy who hadn't stopped talking. 

"Come on Astro, come on. You can sleep in my room and we can be best friends. I have a best friend Sam but she's at school. Be my friend Astro pleeeaaasseee. I'm four just like you. We're not babies like puppies or my uncle Ashton has a baby, her name is Lauren. She's little so we can't play with her yet, but her sister Annie is four like us, and Kat is three. I forgot," her little hands fluttered with excitement. "Oh Astro, listen listen, Uncle Michael will let us come over. We can go in the pool, and he has dogs that will be your friend too. And I have the best mommy and daddy. Mommy is so pretty. She dances with me and says I am brave. I am smart. You need to be brave too Astro."

By now the dog was closer, almost in reach. Astro's eyes were fixed on Lucy, listening intently. Calum squatted down next to his daughter. "Lulu are you sure?" 

Lucy nodded rapidly, her pigtails bouncing as she answered. "Completely sure Daddy. He's lonely, I need to be his friend." 

Calum laughed, but it died when he looked down and saw the sadness and hope in the dog's eyes. "Poor little guy," Calum thought. "He doesn't know what's happening, just that he's been abandoned." 

 "Can we take him? Instead of a puppy?" He asked. 

"Please, please, please?" Lucy scrambled to her feet, bouncing on her toes, and her dark eyes pleading with them. 

"Of course, I just gotta get some paperwork. Come with me to the front and I'll get that taken care of," they started to lead Calum away but Lucy held back.

"I gotta go up front for the paper works, but you're coming home with us Astro," Lucy told him.

She turned and started to follow them, and Astro let out a long mournful whine. She turned around and went back.

"It's ok, I'll be right here. I won't leave you," Lucy blew him a kiss and ran back to her dad. 

They got up to the front and Calum told the employee they had to step outside for a moment.

"Daddy no, we can't leave," Lucy started to cry again. "We gotta get Astro."

"We will Lulu, but if I don't get you changed your mother will have my neck. I don't need mama mad at me," Calum told her. 

Lucy accepted that and didn't protest farther. You always packed a "car bag" whenever Lucy went anywhere in case of emergencies. Sure enough, tucked under the wet wipes, hair ties, and first aid kit was a change of clothes including socks and underwear. Fortunately it hadn't soaked through, so Calum took her shoes off and quickly changed her in the back of the Rover to leggings and a tunic.  

"He's gonna think we left him," she was pulling at him as they walked back in. 

They'd just walked through the door and they could hear Astro's whimpering as they were bringing him out. Calum whipped out his camera just in time to record Lucy's reaction when the dog came out, but it was Astro's expression of joy that touched him most. Lucy knelt down and Astro shuffled up to her, still a little skittish. She was patient, patting her thighs and calling softly to him until he finally came in close and rested his snout on her shoulder giving her a small lick on her ear. Lucy giggled and wrapped her arms around him. Calum took a picture and sent it to you as a heads up with the caption.

Lucy and Astro ❤️ I'll explain when I get home. I love you

Astro? I thought we were fostering a puppy. How can I say no now? We'll have this conversation later after Lucy goes to bed. I love you

*******

You rubbed your temples and sighed, hating yourself for being so irritated. You weren't feeling well and had a lot on your mind. You needed to have a conversation with your husband, but that would have to wait. 

You were in the kitchen checking on dinner when you heard the car pulling into the driveway. You made it to the door and were greeted by your daughter's excited chatter. Calum came around with Lucy, in different clothes then she's left in, dancing backward trying to control herself. You caught sight of Astro, a beautiful dog but seemed timid. He was watching Lucy's every move. Calum smiled at you and mouthed "are you ok?" You nodded and smiled back, not wanting him to worry.  

Astro wouldn't come near you, and ducked away when you reached out for him. He trailed behind Lucy as she introduced him to the house. 

"Hey you," Calum murmured in your ear, coming up behind you. You leaned back into his embrace, feeling your mind and body relax in a way only Calum could bring out. "I have to do some laundry. Why don't you go rest up and let me watch over the kid." 

"Sweetheart I'm fine, I've got a veggie lasagna in the oven. I've just been tired, but we can talk about that later. What happened at the shelter? I notice she changed clothes," you turned around, gazing up at your husband. You never got tired of looking at his face, still amazed you were lucky enough to love him. 

"One of the puppies peed on her. It was a disaster, and I really thought we were coming home empty-handed." 

"So how did we end up with Astro?" You reached up and booped his nose.

Calum grinned and wrinkled his nose in response," you always do that." 

"Your nose is always cute." 

"We were leaving through the kennels, and she was pretty freaked out. She had to psych herself up saying, I am smart, I am brave. I swear you're such a great mom. I'm so glad I knocked you up," he told you, landing a kiss on your lips. "As we were leaving she stopped, and even tricked me by telling me her shoes were untied. She took off and found this small creature that needed her to be his friend. The shelter employee said Astro ignored pretty much everyone until Lucy came along. She was so patient, I was really surprised, but she waited for him to come to her. She kept telling him she wanted to be his friend. It was the cutest thing."

"What no video?" 

"Of course, but Lucy has been a bit too quiet. Let's go see what she's up to," he kissed you again, reluctant to let go. "Are you sure you're ok?" 

"Yes, Cal," you replied as you stepped back and took his hand. 

You found Lucy in her playroom introducing Astro to her toys, bringing each one out and letting him sniff it before putting it back. 

Later at dinner Lucy chattered away in her booster seat while Astro laid by her chair. He finally let you pet him in return for some wet dog food. He seemed to be adjusting pretty well for the first night until it was time for bed. He whimpered and whined when Calum put him in his crate. Lucy, overtired and cranky, began sobbing inconsolably. You were tempted to not give in, but Calum compromised by letting Lucy "camp out." They pulled out Lucy's sleeping bag so she could sleep in her playroom with the crate. 

"We'll figure it out tomorrow, my love," Calum assured you. He got them settled in and Astro quieted down once Lucy laid down. You stood in the doorway watching him tuck your daughter in and sing her to sleep. In no time she was out like a light, and Cal turned his attention to you. 

"It's been a long day," he kissed you and pulled you back towards the living room. "Let me make you a drink and give you a backrub," He gave you a wink and a wicked smile as his hand slid down to your ass. 

"Would you make me a cup of tea, and then we can talk back rub. Although it always ends up going further than that." You laugh at the smirk he gives you in response. 

"You're the one who starts it," he reminded her.

"Not fair," you protest. "You're such a tease." 

"Me, I'm completely innocent," Calum protested.

"You are not, but you're very handsome so I'll let it slide." You sat on the couch and the anxiety came creeping back. 

Calum brought your tea, a bag of cookies, and settled in next to you. He pulled you in close to his side, wrapping his arm around you, and throwing your legs over his so you were sitting at an angle that he could see your face.

"Now will you please tell me what's going on? You've been stressing for days, and you won't tell me what's going on. Please don't shut me out. If you're having a rough time, just tell me. We can work through anything, but I don't want it to get bad like last time." You'd always struggled with depression, and you'd had a terrible time after Lucy was born. His thumb stroked the back of your hand as he spoke, and you saw the worry in his eyes and felt terribly guilty. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you worry," you began, but Calum cut you off.

"Don't apologize, my love, just talk to me," Calum took your hand and raised it to his mouth for a kiss.

"Ok, I know this isn't the best timing. You're going on tour and Lucy starts kindergarten in the fall. Do you remember Luke's pool party?"

"The madness of all the kids together. Luke almost setting the grill on fire. You in that blue swimsuit." Calum's voice dropped to a growl as his hand slid up your thigh. 

"Don't you start, that's how I got in this predicament," you warned him.

"I don't start anything, but I finish it.  Don't think I won't take you right here in the living-" Calum stopped, his eyes going wide as he looked at you.

He looked at the mug of tea steaming on the coffee table then back at your face. His hand moved from your legs to your waist, resting on your belly.

"You're pregnant?" 

You nodded. "Like I said I'm sorry the timing isn't ideal but-." Your words were smothered in a kiss as Calum pulled you onto his lap. 

"Are you sure? Did you take a test?" 

"While you guys were gone. I've suspected it for about a week now, but I needed a test." 

"Can I see it?" 

"It's in my purse." 

Calum grabbed your bag and was back by your side instantly. He watched as you pulled out a plastic baggie work the test in it. He saw the two blue lines right away, and he started to cry. You panicked, thinking for a second he was upset with you, but when he looked up at you, you'd never seen him look happier. 

"Come here you," he pulled you onto him so you were straddling him on the couch, sitting face to face. "Forget about the timing, we've never done anything at the right time." He cupped your face in his hands, brushing his fingers along your jawline and cheeks. "None of that matters because it's you and I, and together we can get through anything. I love you so much. You're the best mom. I can't believe we're gonna have another little one," he gave you a kiss, and then another.  "I can never thank you enough for everything you've given me and how happy you make me every day." He wiped his eyes but the tears wouldn't stop. 

"Why are you crying? Are you going soft on me Hood?" You asked, but you were laughing and crying along with him.

He pushed himself off the couch, lifting you up with him in one fluid motion. 

"Feel those muscles baby? Definitely not soft," Calum growled in your ear as he carried you down the hall. 

"What are you doing?" You asked as he stopped so y'all could peek in on Lucy and Astro.

"I'm about to show my beautiful wife how much I love her. Especially now that I don't have to worry about getting you pregnant."

@kiiiimberlyriiiicker1995 @sexgodashton @maluminspace @wildmichaelflower @ghostofmashton @sublimehood @tea4sykes @h0tsos @goth5sos @5-secondsofcolor @toofadedtofight @calteahood @noshamenion @irwinkitten @mermaidcashton @cherrycolamike​

#calum hood #dad!calum #calum 5sos #5sos #calum hood imagine #calum hood fanfic #calum x reader

[buckyscrystalqueen]

Meant To Be: Part 9

Pairings: Machine Gun Kelly x Reader

Warnings: Swearing, drug use, cheating

Word Count: 5,975

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You woke up one morning two weeks after being back in the States with a familiar, uneasy feeling in the pit of your stomach. 

“He’s cheating on me.” You said to Sawyer when she finally came down to make a cup of coffee before she headed out back to the pool to edit a new book for the day.

“He’s not cheating.” She said as she glanced over at you as you served Gage his breakfast.

“Soy, I know this feeling. I have felt this feeling before. He’s cheating.”

“Sweetheart, just breathe. He’s not cheating on you, he’s just doing shows...”

“No...” You interrupted with a shake of your head. “No, see I know this man. I know this man so well, that I can see the signs before he even realizes he’s making the moves.”

“OK, so what are the signs?” She asked as she leaned against the counter and took a sip of her coffee. You hesitated for a moment, before simply scowling and looking over at her.

“I’m not crazy here.” You snapped. “I know that man better than I know myself. And I know he’s slept with some one else or he’s going to tonight. I can feel it to my core...”

“OK, did you try calling him?”

“Six times since I woke up.” You said with a nod as you made yourself a bowl of cereal. “No answer, no text back. He never misses his morning call...”

“OK, let me call JP and see...”

“There’s no point.” You said with a shake of your head. “If I have this feeling now, it means I’m already too late. And besides that, it’s almost concert time there, so he won’t answer.”

“(Y/N), are you sure it’s not just a pregnancy thing? Maybe?”

“No.” You sighed with a shake of your head. “Every single time this man has cheated on me, I knew.” With a shake of your head, you looked over at her with a hint of tears in your eyes. “I’m not crazy.”

“No, sweetie, I believe you.” She said with a nod as she stepped over and pulled you into a hug. “We’ll figure it out, OK?” With a nod, you started to cry for a moment, before pulling back to control yourself.

“Four hours.” You told her with a sniffle. “I’ll bet you a thousand dollars that within the next four hours, I’ll have my answer.”

“Hun, let me text Rook...”

“Don’t you dare.” You interrupted. “If that man can’t keep a fucking promise himself without having someone else breathing down his neck about it, then he can make and sleep in his own fucking bed about it.”

“OK. I won’t text Rook. But try not to obsess about it, sweets. I’m sure it’s nothing.”

“We’ll see.” You huffed as you turned to start eating your own breakfast. “We’ll just wait and see.”

“And pray for the best.” She added as she picked up her manuscript off the counter to get some work done while you both waited. You did your best to try and distract yourself for the better part of the morning, but you still religiously checked your Instagram, waiting for the backstage videos you knew the guys always posted to their stories to appear to find what you were looking for. Baze was the first one to deliver, and boy did he deliver.

“I told you.” You said to Sawyer as you walked out to the patio with your phone in your hand. She looked up from her work at the live video with her brow furrowed.

“What am I... oh.” She said as Baze turned to left, giving you both a crystal clear shot of Kels leading some blonde woman neither of you knew out of the green room by the hand. “Holy shit. Wait, this is live.”

“I told you.” You said as you took your phone back with a shake of your head. “I know this feeling. I know this man like the back of my Goddamn hand.”

“Wait, let me call Rook.”

“Don’t bother.” You replied as you turned to head back inside. “I’m going house hunting, you coming?”

“Wait... shit.” She groaned as she threw her pens in the manuscript and jumped up to chase after you. “Are you serious?”

“I told him I wasn’t playing fucking games this time.” You said as you picked up your packed diaper bag, and your son, who you had already gotten dressed and ready to go because you knew this was going to happen, whether people believed you or not. “I’m not doing this to my kids. He can get fucked for all I care now.”

“OK, well wait for me to change at least.” She said as she dashed over to the stairs.

“We’ll be in the car.” You told her as you unlocked the front door. “We have an appointment with a realtor in an hour.” The hour was more than enough time for the three of you to make it to your realtor’s office so she could help you find a nice, move in ready house to rent, and the appointment was timed perfectly so you could make the FaceTime call that put the nail in the coffin of your relationship as well.

“Hey...” Colson panted when he finally answered the call as he pushed his hair back out of his face. “Sorry, it’s been a crazy day. You OK?”

“Show me your room.” You said evenly.

“What?” He asked as panic raced across his blue eyes. “Babe, I’m trying to sleep.”

“Bullshit, Colson.” You interrupted as he got up and quickly headed over to the bathroom. “Room, now.”

“I gotta pee.” He lied.

“Show me your Goddamn room!” You screamed a few seconds before the half dressed blonde dashed across the background and out the hotel room door. “And there it is.” You huffed and shook your head as he quickly tried to explain, while Sawyer looked absolutely stunned beside you.

“Babe, it’s not...”

“I’m done, Kels.” You said evenly. “We’re done.”

“(Y/N), it’s not what...” He started as you hung up the phone and put his calls on silent.

“How did you know that?“ Your friend asked as she looked over at you in disbelief.

“Because I know everything.” You said as you made your next phone call before your appointment time. “Junior. Shut up, I need a huge favor, but you can’t tell dad, and I will pay for everything.”

“Oh, shit.” Your brother sighed through the speaker. “What, you in jail again?”

“I need you and a few friends to come out to California to help me move. Today. Like next flight out, today.” You sighed as tears started falling down your cheeks. “I need... I need my brother...”

“OK, I’m coming.” He said with zero hesitation simply because of the shift in your tone. “I’m coming right now.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I told you not to tell dad.”

“I had to tell dad.” Junior said as he headed in to your old house later that afternoon to finish packing up your things and get the boxes you couldn’t move into a rented U Haul. “Had to take off work last minute.”

“And you’re crazy if you think I wasn’t going to come rescue my daughter.” Ross finished as he stepped inside beside your sister and her husband to say hi. “You may not think to highly of me, but you’re still my kid.”

“You didn’t tell mom, right?”

“No one’s talked to mom since she took you to court.” Tabby said as she kissed your cheek. “Thanks for letting us know about that, by the way.”

“Figured y’all would side with her.” You confessed honestly.

“Alright, what’s going, and where is it going?” Junior asked as he looked around the down stairs.

“Any cardboard box or tote that you see out is going.” You instructed with a sniffle. “There’s some more upstairs, and all the furniture from Gage’s room that I’m taking with me, but I still have more to pack...”

“Alright, boys. Get these boxes outta here.” Ross instructed as he looked at Tabby. “You go help your sister.”

“There’s two boxes in the kitchen marked with giant F’s that are fragile and food.” You called out as you headed upstairs. “Those can go in my car with that big cooler!”

“Is he coming back soon?” Tabby asked as she followed you up.

“No idea.” You sighed as you walked into your room, where Sawyer was packing up your bathroom stuff for you while keeping an eye on your napping son in your bed. “We haven’t heard anything from our inside man about him canceling any shows, so my guess is no.”

“But my boyfriend and I are both stuck between a rock and a hard place here.” Sawyer called out as she set the bathroom box on the floor by your bed. “I’m not allowed to tell him she’s moving out until she’s completely moved out, and he is probably not allowed to tell me if and when he’s coming home.”

“Still sorry about that.” You said as you dumped arm fulls of clothes into a box from your dresser drawers with your sister.

“I know.” Your friend said as she moved on to the closet. “I’m still trying to wrap my head around the fact that you fucking called this shit before it happened.”

“Oh, she’s done that since she was a kid.” Tabby chimed in as she packed the jewelry off the top of the dresser in pairs of socks so it wouldn’t get lost. “She knew my dad was seeing someone before anyone else. She knew my first boyfriend was going to be abusive before he even hit me the first time. She knew when I met my husband that he was the one and same with Junior’s fiancée. She’s the relationship crystal ball.”

“That’s wild!”

“Yea, not so much fun when you know the father of your kids is going to cheat on you... again. Nor when I can’t fucking see that he’s just a piece of shit douche bag time after time…” You muttered as you pushed the next full box toward the door. “And he fucking knows I can feel that shit too, yet he still thinks he slick.”

“Well he’s just a dummy.” Tabby said with a quick nod as she looked around the room. “What next?”

“Gage’s room is the last thing.” You said as you pointed out of the room at the nursery door. “Everything is going. The letters on the walls, the cameras, the lamps. Everything. Wait, take boxes.” You said as you kicked a stack of totes in her direction. She grabbed the totes and headed out as you went over with an empty box to clean out your bedside table and all the other nicknacks you had out in the room.

“Who was she?”

“Oh.” You gasped as you looked over your shoulder. “That’s my sister, Tabby. My dad’s downstairs too, which is really interesting, since I’ve always figured they wanted nothing to do with me.”

“Family steps up in weird ways, at weird times.” Your friend said as she closed the second closet box and pushed it into the middle of the room. “I’ll go help her.” It took your little tribe only forty-five minutes to clean all of your stuff out of Colson’s place, and only twenty minutes to unpack just the boxes from your storage unit. You hated that you’d have to replace all of the furniture in there, but even after a year, it still reeked of cigarette smoke, and had various sized burn holes you hadn’t paid much attention to when you packed it up originally. It took even less time to unpack everything at your new place since there was no real furniture to move yet, and you were just finishing up when the half dozen pizzas you got as a thank you for the guy’s help were delivered to your door.

“What are you gunna do ‘bout furniture, kiddo?” Your dad asked as he looked around the open concept kitchen and living room.

“I’ll deal with it tomorrow.” You sighed with a shake of your head. “Go to a hotel or something tonight.”

“OK, well then I’ll call the U Haul place and book the truck an extra day, and then the hotel we’re at and get you a room with my points.”

“Dad, no.”

“Hush.” He said as he looked down at his grandson, who was pulling at his jean leg to show him a toy. “Wat’cha got there, kiddo? A truck?! Does the truck go ‘vroom vroom’?” You smiled at your old man as he sat down on the floor with a giant smile you hadn’t seen in years to play with his first grandson and one of the toys Gage had pulled out of one of his totes.

“You can tell Rook.” You said softly as you looked over at Soy. “Just tell him his kids are safe.”

“OK.” She nearly whispered as she picked up her cell phone to step out to make the call. “I’m really sorry, (Y/N).”

“So am I.” You sighed as you walked over to the nearest box to start unpacking your life once again as tears fell slowly down your cheeks.

“Come on, boys. Work’s not done yet.” Junior said when he saw what you were doing as he set his crust down on his plate and wiped his hands off on his jeans. “Kitchen first.”

——

“We’re goin’ to the Costco…” Your dad announced early the next morning when you opened your hotel room door with a scowl on your face.

“Daddy, it’s five-thirty in the fucking morning. Costco don’t open until nine.”

“And we’re goin’ to the Walmart.” He finished with a nod. “Get your things, you’re wasting daylight. Breakfast is gettin’ served, and the boys are gettin’ rowdy…”

“OK, OK.” You sighed, knowing that he would just keep talking about absolutely nothing until you did what you were told. “Let me wake up the kid and get dressed.”

“Be ready in twenty minutes.” He said as he turned to continue his wake up visits. “Got a lot to do today.”

“Of course we do.” You huffed as you closed the door behind you with a shake of your head. You got yourself ready as fast as you could, letting Gage get as much sleep as you could until you had to get him up. You were shocked that he woke up on the right side of the bed, and was in a very happy mood. His infectious smile and adorable laugh brightened your morning, and reminded you just why you were in the situation you found yourself in. You were just putting him in his stroller with your diaper bag on your shoulder, when your dad knocked on your door again.

“I’m coming, I’m coming.” You huffed as you snapped the tray in place and unlocked the breaks. You grabbed your phone, that had dozens of missed calls and texts on it, and threw it and your room key into your bag on your way out the door. “You are so impatient, old man.”

“You were getting up this early for the farm.” He said as the two of you led the group to the elevators. “This is the time you should always start your day.”

“He called me to try to wake me up at two thirty.” Junior complained with a shake of his head. “We were still drinking at two thirty.”

“Where the hell did you go drinking at?” You asked as you looked over at him.

“At Ope’s…” He said slowly as if it were the most obvious answer in the world. “Where we stayed last night…”

“Where the fuck is Ope’s?”

“I’m Ope. Well, I’m Opie.” A very tall man behind you said, which made you turn around to look at him. You double took at the familiar face, and tried to find it in your mind as your brow furrowed.

“Wait, I know you…”

“I would hope so.” He laughed. “I’ve been friends with your brother since we were all kids.”

“No, that’s not it.” You said with a shake of your head as you turned toward him a little more. “I know you from here. From LA.”

“I would hope so.” He laughed even harder with a nod. “I was your photographer for Penthouse for the last year you were working.” Your face dropped and completely paled as he swiped his hand at you. “Don’t worry about it. You were pretty fucked up back then, and dealing with your ex’s shit on a regular basis so I don’t take it personally.”

“Oh, my God. I am so, so sorry.”

“It’s fine.” He chuckled as he pat your shoulder. “Really, it is.”

“I’m sober now.” You clarified even though you knew you didn’t have to. “Two years or something like that.”

“Good for you.” He said as he glanced over at you with a smile. “I was always hoping you’d get there. Watching you head toward rock bottom was kinda scary.”

“Scarier to live it, I promise.” You said as you dropped your diaper bag on a long table by the hotel’s buffet and parked the stroller where you’d be able to see your son.

“Oh, I bet. But thank God you made it out on the other side.”

“I more thank God Gage made it out on the other side alive and healthy after my OD.” You said as you started the automatic pancake machine and grabbed some scrambled eggs first to cool them down for your son. “Wait, so how in the hell did you get into photography? And did I even recognize you back then, or am I just that shitty of a person?”

“Oh, you’re just that shitty of a person.” He teased as he worked around you to make his own breakfast. “You looked right past me.”

“OK, you’re rude!” You laughed as you whacked his hand as he reached for the bacon tongs. “No, you don’t get any now.”

“Girl, I dare you to try.” He shot back as he lightly body checked you out of the way. “Stand in the way of a man and his bacon. You’re the rude one!”

“Hey, quit!” You laughed as you wrestled him for the tongs. “You are standing between a pregnant woman and bacon! Quit it! I know your mother!”

“Your sister just doesn’t know how to be single, does she?” Your dad asked Tabby as he sat down with his coffee and oatmeal, like he did every morning.

“Has she ever?” She asked as she sipped on her coffee and waited for her turn at the currently crowded buffet.

“Least he’s home grown.” Ross said with a shrug. “Better than that asshole she was seeing.”

“They’re not gunna get together.” Junior said over your loud laugh as he sat down at the table with his two full plates.

“Twenty bucks says you’re wrong.” Tabby said under her breath as you and Opie came over to eat and feed Gage.

“Deal.”

——

“OK, y’all need to stop.” “No seriously, quit.” “OK, I don’t need to decorate, Tabitha!” “Guys, my towels are perfectly fine.” “I swear to fucking God.”

“When you gunna learn, (Y/N)?” Junior asked as your group stood in line with carts of food, spices, towels, toys, “proper clothes” for you and Gage, and other things deemed ‘necessities’ by your family.

“Each one of you had a college fund.” Ross said as he unloaded the second of three carts onto the conveyer belt. “None of ya went to college, so your sister got hers when she got married and bought a house, Junior got his when he bought a house, you’re getting yours when you need it. But I swear to the Lord above, child.” He said as he stopped and looked up at you with a point of his finger. “Do not abuse this generosity. This is for my grandchildren to have a good life, and for you to raise them up proper. You take care of this stuff, you hear me? Don’t you go back to that man and just throw this shit in storage. All he’s ever done is hurt you anyways; I don’t care what he’s done good otherwise. All three’a ya deserve better.”

“Yes sir.” You said with a nod as you put your hand on your bump. “I understand.”

“You better.” He said with a nod of his head as he went back to what he was doing as your brother snickered silently behind his back. “Or you can deal with Anne and hear all about how I’m just pissing my hard earned money away.”

“Dad, why are you starting fights with the woman that already hates me?” You sighed as you grabbed a stuffed bunny rabbit from Gage before he threw it again to get Tabby’s attention behind you.

“Because you are my child.” He said as he stood up straight and looked at you seriously. “And my children will always come first. You remember that, you hear me?”

“That’s why we are where we are.” You said as you looked down at your son and ran your hand across the back of his head. “For them.”

“Then we keep going.” He said with a nod as he went back to work. You shook your head at him and leaned down to kiss your son’s head as a selfless love you hadn’t felt in a long, long time washed over.

“I love you, Dad.” You said softly as you pushed your cart up for him to unload. “Thank you.” He nodded his head as he looked up at you for a single, priceless moment. 

“Love you too. Gage Michael, don’t you throw that rabbit at your aunt!”

“Child, I swear to God.” You groaned as you took the rabbit from him, causing your first of many early morning tantrums so you could pay for his new favorite toy. “You’re going to kill me one of these days.”

“That’s what I said about you, too.” Your dad huffed as he took the tags off the bunny and passed it back to you. “And yet I’m still standing here breathing.”

“Shut up, Dad.” You laughed with a shake of your head.

——

“You calling to say good night to your son?” You asked when you finally answered your phone later that night. “Because we are not speaking right now.”

“What the fuck, bitch?!” Colson roared as you put together a baby gate at the top of one of the stairs in the interesting split level house that had too much personality for you to pass up on. “Where’s my fucking son?!”

“He’s um…” You said as you looked up across the split staircase at your master bedroom, and then the general area of the room that was now designated as the nursery for the baby on the way, the bathroom that room shared with Gage’s, and finally his room and the laundry room behind you, most of which was behind a wall. You knew exactly where he was since you could hear him watching a movie with your sister in your room while your dad and brother set up his room and Opie and Tabby’s husband, Mike set up the nursery furniture for you, but you shrugged your shoulders and went back to doing your share of the work. “I don’t know. I think he took my keys, though. Try Mexico…?”

“Dude, I swear to fuck, I will call the mother fucking cops.” 

“Fucking chill, he’s watching Thomas the train with my sister.”

“No, where… the fuck… is my child?!” He repeated. “Because he sure as fuck isn’t in my fucking house where’s he’s fucking supposed to be!”

“Nope. He’s in mine.” You said as you tightened the last zip tie so you wouldn’t leave marks on the banisters, and checked that the gate swung open, closed, and locked the way it was supposed to like the one on the other side, and the one at the bottom of the stairs did.

“Babe, why the fuck did you move out?!” He asked as you picked up your cell phone to head to your room to grab the outlet covers to put in downstairs in the living room, dining room, and kitchen next.

“Because you fucking cheated on me!” You screamed as you stopped just outside the door. “Yet again! And I told you that I wasn’t playing that fucking game this time. So we’re done. And we’re done for good. Now, do you want to say good night to your son, or are we just gunna try this again tomorrow?” You watched him fight his demons on whether he wanted to keep fighting with you, or see his son, but he knew you well enough to know that if he tried, you would hang up the phone and go back to ignoring him again.

“Where’s my son?” With a nod of your head, you walked into your room and smiled at your child.

“Hey, Gage. Look, it’s Daddy!”

“Hey buddy!” He cooed, and being on the other side of the screen, you could hear the regret in his voice as his new reality washed over him with the flash of your new bedroom. “You being good for Mommy, huh? Yea. Hey Tabby.”

“Colson.” Your sister said as she picked up a single Cheerio and ate it with a distasteful look on toward him on her face.

“I miss you little man. I miss you a whole lot. And Daddy’s coming home real soon to come see you and Mommy.”

“Mommy has plans.” You said as you did your bedroom and bathroom with the outlet covers first since you were there.

“I’ll be home in a couple days, buddy.” He sighed. “And Daddy loves you so much.”

“Can you say bye bye?” You asked as you pushed a cover into an outlet and turned to get your phone. “Say bye bye to Daddy. Uncle Junior probably has your bed set up by now.”

“Wait, can you just…” Colson said as you reached out to hang up. “Babe, just wait…”

“Colson, I can’t.” You said as you picked up the phone. “Don’t call me unless it’s to say good morning or good night to Gage. We can talk when you get done sleeping with road sluts.”

“Babe…”

“Good bye, Kels.” You sighed as tears welled in your eyes, and you quickly hung up the phone before he could see you cry.

“Here, I’ll do the outlets up here.” Tabby said as she got up off the bed with a small smile. “You watch the movie for a bit.”

“Thanks, Tab.” You sniffled as you climbed on the bed next to your little boy, who was so enthralled with the show he hadn’t even noticed you had hung up with his dad. “We’re gunna be OK, baby boy.” You told him softly as you pulled him into your arms with silent tears falling down your face. “I promised you. We’re gunna be OK.”

——

You didn’t immediately recognize the black pick up in your drive way when you came back from the airport the next afternoon, but the fading UNC sticker on the bumper made you smile and gave you your answer as you pulled into your drive way beside it. Opie glanced over from his phone and took one more drag of his cigarette before putting it out on the bottom of his flip flop as you got out of the car.

“So I found a box in the back seat of my car.” He said with a giant smirk as he left the cigarette butt on the tire of his truck on his way to the passenger side. “Missing some panties?”

“So you’re the reason I’m going commando today.” You laughed as you pulled your sleeping son out of the back. You stopped in front of him to glance in the box he was holding as you adjusted the strap of your diaper bag on your shoulder, before looking up into his brown eyes. “Well, looks like you can officially say you got into my panties a lot quicker than most.”

“First of all, wow.” He laughed as his face flushed behind his beard the slightest bit. “But secondly, I also saw you in your panties long before anyone else did. Or have you forgotten the many adventures of drunken (Y/N) at your brother’s middle school graduation party?”

“Listen, swimming in your underwear is never a bad idea.” You laughed as you locked up your car and headed inside. “And I wasn’t drunk, I was perfectly coherent, thank you.”

“Sweetheart, we were all drunk.” He chuckled. “We were just kids.”

“And for some reason, my father thought it’d be a good idea to leave us all alone that night.” You sighed with a shake of her head. “Thank God for Anne in that situation alone.”

“I’d have to agree with you there. Where do you want this?”

“Just leave it by the stairs. I’ll carry it up later...”

“I got it.” He said as he opened the baby gate. “On your bed?”

“Perfect.” You said as you laid Gage down in his pack and play so he’d keep napping a while longer.

“So what are your plans for the rest of the afternoon?” Ope asked as he came back down stairs. You sighed loudly as you kicked off your shoes and sat down on your sectional couch.

“I guess I have to find a job.” You breathed as you ran your fingers through your hair. “Don’t know what the hell a pregnant, ex junkie, ex model is gunna do for work...”

“Call your agent.” He said as he leaned over the back of the other side of the couch. “Tell him to get you into a TV show role or something. They’re always looking for people.”

“Oh, yay. I can be that kind of celebrity now.” You laughed as you turned and laid down to get comfortable. “You hanging out, or you got some place to be?”

“I can hang a bit.” He said as he stood up straight and came around the couch to sit down on the opposite side. “I just figured you’d wanna nap... oh. That’s a nice fucking couch.”

“Shoes off if you’re napping too then.” You giggled as you rolled onto your side and found a comfortable spot. “It’s a really nice fucking couch.”

“Oh, I could get used to this.” He said as he put his shoes under the coffee table and laid down completely, easily taking up the entire right side with his six foot four frame.

“Spots available, apply within.” You sighed as you closed your eyes for a moment. “Quit touching me.”

“I’m not touching you.” He said as he purposely hit your foot with his shin as he got comfortable himself. “You’re in my space.”

“Oh, get out.” You laughed as you opened your eyes to look at him with a smile. He smirked back and propped himself up on his hand.

“I have to say, I’m really fucking glad to see you smiling again. It got really scary there for a while.”

“How’d you get into photography in the first place?” You asked as you pulled out a blanket from the shelf under the coffee table and tossed it over to him before grabbing one for yourself.

“I’ve always been into it.” He said with a shrug as he tossed the blanket down his legs as far as it would go. “It’s what I went to college for. I just managed to get lucky with my portfolio when I got out here. You remember KaceyJo? She was in your grade?”

“Didn’t y’all get married?”

“Divorced about five years ago.” He said with a nod. “But she did a lot of modeling for me around town when we were married. So I had a portfolio full of awesome Smoky Mountain views and her in various poses in those shots. So I stood out.”

“Probably helps that you’re a hot, bearded giant that could rock a man bun for days.” You pointed out with a small grin. “But I may be harboring an old school girl crush.”

“You had a crush on me?” He asked as he sat up the slightest bit. “How the fuck did I not know that?”

“Because I told Tabby I’d break her snow globe collection if she told anyone. She was the only person that knew. Dude, why else would I go swimming in my underwear in front of Junior?!”

“Wow.” He huffed with a shake of his head. “The things you learn years later at reunions. Well, now you kinda have an answer on why I worked my way to Penthouse for a year.”

“What, for me?”

“You weren’t the only one with a crush back then.” He said with a shrug. “I just told Junior that I’d tell Laura about that night he spend with Molly when they first got together if he ratted me out and he told me you were forever off limits.”

“Oh, good old skanky Molly. Wonder whatever happened to her.”

“Slept her way up Wall Street last I heard.”

“Par for the course.” He nodded his head in agreement as he took his keys and phone out of his shorts pocket and put them and his bandana on the coffee table. “I’m really sorry, Ope.”

“Don’t be, sweetheart.” He said as he brushed his toes against your ankle for comfort. “I saw how toxic he was for you. He fed into that shit so bad, I wanted to knock his ass out every time he came to set. And you were so far in the rabbit hole, only God could get you out at that point. So I did what my church going upbringing told me to. I prayed. First time in a decade at least, but fuck if I didn’t try. Only thing I could do after you threw a bottle of tequila at my face for trying to talk to you.” You groaned and turned cherry red as you tried to cover your face with a blanket, but he chuckled and leaned over enough to grab the material to pull it away. 

“It’s OK.” He reassured as you looked up at him with tears in your eyes. “I don’t blame you. We all go through rough patches in life, it’s what we do after hitting rock bottom that matters. I went through some shit when KaceyJo and I split up. Got in a few bar fights, got arrested, had to do anger management, lost my job. But I’m better off now. Got a good job, got friends... you became a mother, and you’ve got a roof over their heads, and you’re taking steps to do the best you can by them now. That’s what matters now. Not what you did two years ago. What you’re doing right now.” With a nod of your head, you started to cry, and Opie got up and came over to your side of the couch to lay down in front of you.

“I’m sorry.” You choked as you scooted back for him so he could wrap you in his arms.

“It’s OK, sweetheart.” He said softly as he rubbed your back. “I forgive you. I forgive you for everything.” You shook your head the slightest bit and gently held on to his shirt while he laid with you wordlessly to let you feel every emotion you had about your time as an addict since you got sober that you hadn’t been able to do with Colson until you cried yourself to sleep in the safety of an old friend’s arms.

Part 10

#meant to be #machine gun kelly x reader #mgk x reader #colson baker x reader

[myhockeyworld87]

28 with Jamie O☺️

You’d been Jamie for a little over a year when he finally asked you to move in with him. Things were going perfect, the two of you had decided to start looking at houses in Dallas and everything. That was until you woke up sick one morning. Jamie found you vomiting into the toilet at six in the morning. “Babe, are you ok?”

 “Don’t get too close Jamie, if I have the flu I don’t want you to get it.”

 “Well can I at least get you something?” It was super sweet of him to ask but you really didn’t want him getting sick, as he had a three day road trip coming up.

 “No, I’m good.” You dry heaved a few more times, then finally felt your stomach start to calm. Making your way to the spare room, you laid down and fell asleep, waking up right before Jamie left.

 “How are you feeling baby?”

 “Much better, maybe it was something that I ate. I don’t know.” He went to kiss you goodbye, but you held up a hand. “Better to be safe just in case it’s not food poisoning.”

 Instead, he blew you a kiss, then picked up his bag to leave. “I love you. I call you when you get to St. Louis.”

 “Love you too.” You made yourself some chicken soup that night, but your stomach really was feeling better. However, when you got up the next morning you instantly hit with another bout of nausea. You found yourself clutching the toilet bowl yet again. It was horrible, but again in the afternoon you were fine. When it happened the next day you started looking at the calendar to calculate out the days since your last period. To your surprise, you were late, not horribly late, but you were still a good four days from when your period should’ve started. It hit you then, that all this vomiting probably meant you were pregnant. Part of you was excited and the other was scared. Marriage and kids had come up every now and then with Jamie, and you knew it was something that you both wanted; you just weren’t sure how he would feel about it right now.

 You went out that night and got a couple pregnancy tests, all ready to take them, but it recommended you use your first-morning pee, so you decided to wait. Jamie would be home shortly in the morning and then you two could figure this whole thing out together. You could barely sleep that night, as you tossed and turned waiting for morning to come so that it would confirm what you already knew; that you were pregnant.

 As soon as the sun rose, you headed to the bathroom, to take the test, which was positive. You were completely ecstatic, though nervous for how Jamie would handle everything. You busied yourself in the kitchen, making some oatmeal in hopes that you’d be able to keep that bland food down. It was about two hours later when you had the urge to go to the bathroom again, though this time your heart sank as you sat on the toilet, for there was a small amount of blood in your panties. Tears formed in your eyes at the loss of something you didn’t even have. Shoving the test aside, that you left for Jamie to see, you made your way back to bed and sobbed your heart out. That’s how Jamie found you moments later. “Baby, what’s wrong? Are you still sick?”

 “No, no Jame I’m not.” You choked out through tears.

 “Then what is it, babe?”

 “I thought I was pregnant but the test must have been wrong. I’m not.” And you found yourself crying harder. Jamie gathered you in his arms, softly shushing you as he rocked your body back and forth.

 When you finally calmed, he asked. “Is that why you were sick?” You nodded your head weakly. “So you took a test and it said you were pregnant?” again you nodded. “So why don’t you think you are?”

 “There was blood.” You hiccupped out.

 “I understand.” And he continued to rock your body. “Is a baby something you wanted?”

 “I didn’t think I did. I mean not right now, but yeah Jame. I think I do.”

 He peeled your body back from his so that he could look into your eyes. “I want that too (Y/N). I want that with you. So maybe it didn’t happen this time, but we could start trying. I mean if you want to.”

 You couldn’t believe what he’d been saying; you’d been so worried about his reaction but this was a scenario that you never expected. “Yeah Jame. I really want to.”

 He leaned you both back against the pillows. “Then let’s do it, let’s try and have a baby.” You smiled up at him, before resting your head on his chest and falling asleep.

#Myhockey blurbs #jamie oleksiak #Jamie Oleksiak imagine #Jamie Oleksiak imagines

[modernsocialmediaau]

AVALANCE AU

AU: Sara is lead singer in a band called The Legends. Her band mates are; Charlie: Bass Player, Nate: Lead Guitarist, Zari: Drummer, Ray: Pianist. They call their fans beebos. Ava on the other hand is a famous actress with an entourage; Nora her best friend, and stylist, Gary: Manager, and Mona her publicist.

Surprise Motherfucker.

Nora smiles happily taking Ava’s phone before getting into the car to head to the airport. 

“Let the detox begin.” Nora smiles jumping onto the front seat. Ava is still unsure about this weekend, honestly she’d rather be at her small apartment arranging her life away. So when she comes back from Vancouver it’ll feel more like a home instead of boxes. 

“Hey, it’s going to be a good weekend. I promise—“ Nora pats Ava’s leg smirking “What are you planning Darhk—because if its another music festival through the mud and rain I am out.” Ava rolls her eyes thinking about the time she was dragged through the mud just to see Ed Sheeran. 

“Detox weekend, no phones, no paps, no internet. Just a nice, good—detox.” Nora takes her hands off of Ava and places them both on the steering wheel. She is starting to get a little anxious because she knows that as soon as they are at the airport and Ava see’s Sara there is no turning back. 

“Okay, if its suppose to be relaxing and detoxifying why do you seem so anxious?” Ava chuckles tapping along to the music that was playing in the background. 

The car pulls up to the private jet hanger that Gary has arranged, and Ava sits up to see the very familiar crew of The Legends. She rubs her eyes to make sure that she isn't actually crazy and thats who she thinks it is. 

“You didn’t, I told you Sara and I will never be a thing—we are two different people.” Ava turns to Nora who’s got a stupid smirk on her face. Ava turns around to see her window open with everyone including Sara to hear what she’s said.

“Message received.” Sara protrudes her lips and nods, heading for the passenger seat to grab bags with Ray. 

Ava smacks her head on the dashboard and waits for the passenger doors to close which indicates that the two are gone. Ava then turns to Nora and smacks her like crazy, “WhAt Is WrOnG wItH yOu!” Nora chuckles trying to shield herself from Ava’s fire 

“Detox weekend, c’mon lets go.” Nora cheers taking her the key out of the ignition getting out of the car. Ava is still not ready for her impending social doom and sits in the car for a little while longer. 

Ray walks out of the jet and towards Nora, while everybody else is in the jet. “What happened, is she bailing?” He whispers. 

Nora looks over at the parked car to see Ava let out a scream then get out of the car. She then looks back at Ray, happily taps his chest “See on the plane Rayge.” Nora gets on the plane and greets everyone. 

She gets around to hugging everyone but Sara, she makes a face and Zari nods to the bathroom, and Nora smiles she looks around for an empty seat to find that there are two left, one next to Ray’s things and one next to Sara’s things. Nora being somewhat devilish and selfish herself decides to sit next to Ray’s things. Ava comes stepping onto the plane to see the seats available she was about to sit next to her conniving best friend. Yet, as she gets closer to the seat she see’s somebody things there. 

“Excuse me,” Ray maneuvers from behind her to make his way to get to his seat. Nora looks over at the empty seat next to unbeknownst to Ava, Sara’s things. Ava crinkles her nose mockingly wanting to strangle her so called best friend. Ava fastens her seatbelt and everyone starts to converse about what they are most excited about the upcoming weekend. Sara comes out of the bathroom with one eyebrow cocking up at the sight of Ava sitting next to her.

“Hey Nora--Oh! You know for somebody who is convinced we are polar opposites you sure are clingy.” Sara teases sitting down on her seat and fastening her seatbelt, placing her eye mask on and headphones in. Before Ava can respond Sara’s already put up and impenetrable wall of DO NOT DISTURB. Ava looks over at Nora who is happily flirting with Ray. As for Mona she simply smiles at Ava trying to express her excitement. Ava rolls her eyes and takes her book out to distract herself. 

The flight takes off and it’s about a 2 hour flight to Oregon. As Sara sleep and Ava reads the rest of the gang distracts themselves.

“Alright pets who would like to have a friendly little wager—” John smirks getting Nate, Mona and Gary’s attention 

“Wager for what?” Mona wonders proceeding with caution she’s come to know the Brit quite well to be cautious at these things. John has a knack, to simply put it he has a weird sixth sense like some off brand Raven Symoné. 

“For starters, those two.” He points at Nora and Ray who are currently watching a show on Ray’s iPad sharing headphones with one another. Nate and Mona sit up and turn around to look at them and Mona aw’s catching their attention. The two look up and all four of them wave. “Hey buddy,” Nate offers sliding back down on his seat. 

“I’m all ears,” Gary smiles sneaking a look at the two of them every now and again, “Nate, Mo?” John smirks, the two exchange looks and nods in agreement. 

“Alright I’m going to say, that by tonight those two will kiss.” John starts

“How do you know they haven't kissed already?” Gary wonders 

“Nora’s told me, they haven’t .” Mona chimes in, and thats the truth they haven't shared a kiss. 

“What about you luv?” John turns to Gary grabbing his hand and rubbing circles on his thumb “I’m going to say tomorrow afternoon, I mean we’re going on a hike thats a perfect time to get a kiss.” Gary justifies now he’s the one rubbing circles on Johns hand 

“Alright, Nate? Mona?” 

“I’m going to say tomorrow night, we’ve got the fire going, the stars and nothing else.” Mona confidently answers, having read and represented so many romance novels it basically the perfect recipe. 

“None of you know Ray like I do okay, he’s a rather last minute type of guy when it comes to these things. I’m going to say right before we board the plane—”Nate nods his head

“Alright pets $10 in lets go.” John smirks, all four of them put money in the middle and Gary takes it. Placing it safely in his wallet. 

“Now for the second wager—” John smirks before tilting his head at Sara and Ava who are sitting next to four of them 

“That’s a hard one.” Mona shakes her head unsure 

“And thats what makes it more interesting—So? I propose that Sara kisses Ava tomorrow afternoon during the hike.” John finishes and turns to the other three

“My money is on tonight, Sara closes all too well.” Nate sips on his coffee confidently taking out another $10 from his pocket 

“I say Ava kisses her tomorrow night,” Gary hesitantly says

“I’m going to say Sunday morning.” Mona staring at Ava, she of course notices and puts her book down. 

“What?” Ava sasses looking at the four of them gawking at her, the four chuckle awkwardly before turning back to their discussion

“Alright, love playing with you lots. Best of luck” John smirks taking the money, “Now who wants to play a little D and D?” Gary smiles. 

For the rest of the flight the four play their little game. Nora falls asleep on Ray, Ray sleeps as well. Ava reads most of her book, and Sara’s shut eye lasts the whole flight. 

*Alright folks thank you for flying Star Airlines I hope to see you guys soon.*

Ava gets up from her seat and walks over to the bathroom, and Sara took this time to take her eye mask off. The rest of the crew collect their belongings and off of the plane. Sara stretches and nods of to Nora who is the last one off, and Ava walks out. The two girls are quiet as they collect their items until finally Ava speaks, “Sara about what I said earlier—” Ava pauses but Sara continues to put her things in a bag. When she finishes she looks at Ava, 

“Don’t worry about it, like I said message received.” Sara nods off and heads for the exit. Ava rolls her eyes because that doesn't exactly clarify anything, does that mean that Sara does like her but message is received that Ava doesn't feel the same way. Or message received as in I agree with you Ava we are polar opposites and are better off as friends. 

Ava gets off the plane to be greeted by an old jeep that she presumes only Gary can choose. 

“C’mon Sharpie we’ve got some miles ahead of us before we’re really detoxing within nature.” John smacks the side of the car, unsure of where she’s suppose to seat everybody in the car points to the front passenger seat. 

Ava shakes her head knowing that everyone is really scheming. When she gets in the car, Sara is fixes her mirrors. She see’s Ava buckle up, and they head off to their cabin for the weekend. 

“Alright kids, lets get our green on.” Sara says

“Can I at least get my phone?” Ava turns to Nora and she happily shakes her head. 

——————

“Alright pee break before we enter the woods and say goodbye to the 21st century.” Sara parks the car and turns to everyone in the car. Everybody heads for the small quaint diner/gas station including Ava. As for Sara she paces around the car just thinking, lately she’s had a tune stuck inside her head with an amazing melody and upcoming arrangements but no concept. Every concept that keeps popping into her head doesn't fit how she saw the song becoming. 

“Hey Capn—” Charlie walks over handing her a cup of tea, knowing that they aren't coffee drinkers. 

“Hi Chaz what’s going on?” Sara looks down from the stars to her friend, and happily receives the coffee

“How are you doing?” 

“What do you mean? I’m great we get a music break, no paps, phones, or—”

“I meant about the whole Alex thing, I know you saw her recently—“ Charlie states shocking Sara making her choke on her tea

“What do you mean? How could you possibly—“

“I’ve known you for 10 years Sara behavior doesn’t go unnoticed. Plus when you left for the bathroom your phone rang and it was none other than Alex ringing you up.” Charlie chuckles, Sara sighs. Yes she’s been with Alex recently but that’s too catch up. Before they dated, they were friends. Alex is one of the friends that Sara has outside of the band. She loves her band mates she really does but she loves having friends outside of them too. It broke Sara when Alex broke up with her. For Sara everything was going great, because before she knew it her tour was going to end, and they’ll be together.

They flew out to one another every now and again when the opportunity would present itself. And when they finally were in New York the two were going to celebrate being in the same country and state at the same time. Sara came by Alex’s hotel room and broke it off with her. Her main explanation being that even though Sara was there Alex always felt alone. As if her mind is still elsewhere. That truly they weren’t even in a relationship at all.

Sara couldn’t even bother to fight for her because everything she said is true. Anytime Sara would emphasize giving her privacy for a day it was often disregarded. But recently 2 months ago to be precise, Alex sent her a text to grab some coffee just to talk.

Sara doesn’t know what it is about Alex but she’s got a certain soft spot for her and went. Has she been using Ava as an excuse to sneak out from her friends yes, but’s it’s only happened a couple times.

“We’re just talking Charlie, we were friends before we dated.” Sara explains

“Which made it worse when you broke up. You were gutted when she let you go. I’m just looking out for you. You lost a lot when you lost Alex.” Sara nods in agreement stirrring her tea

“You’re telling me, we didn’t even date that long”

“8 years of friendship speaks volumes, you were practically married. Is that why you aren’t so bothered with the whole Ava situation.” Sara chuckles at Charlie’s insinuation

“That and the fact that she is right we are different people. Ava is the type of celebrity who’s private and has mastered the art of being so as well as down to earth. The whole you can take me home to your parents ordeal. As for I—“

“You—“

“Am an artist who can’t be trusted and is often moving. If it hasn’t been clear most of my relationship end due to my unavailability.” Sara finishes her explanation

“That’s just an excuse mate.” Charlie winks getting in the car, Sara looks at the group chuckling and giggling as they make they way back to the car. Sara rolls her eyes getting in the car to start it. Once they are all piled in they start driving the last hour of their trip.

1 Hour Later...

“Alright kiddos four bedroom. Two big rooms, 2 medium rooms and 10 of use which means...” Zari pauses turning to Sara to signifying to take the lead 

“Right Z, Chaz and I take one of the larger rooms,” Sara pauses waiting for anybody else to talk 

“Nora, Mona, and I can take the other big room,” Ava smiles and the others agree. Nate and Ray fist bump “Bunk buddies.” the two say in unison. 

“And the happy rowdy couple get the other room.” Nora jokes 

“Please take the one in the attic, we dont ever ever want to hear you guys.” Zari adds making everyone in the room agree. After that discussion everyone disperses to unpack their things. Mona and Nate have decided to make dinner for the group, which should keep them busy. 

As Sara, Charlie and Zari unpacks Charlie and Zari decide to exchange looks. Charlie only ever trusted Zari about the new Alex information but having confronted Sara with that information she thought it’s the perfect time to bring Zari into the conversation.

“What have you been Alex been doing?” Zari brings up. Sara turns around to face Zari then Charlie then back to Zari. 

“Obviously nothing public because that is something I don't want to spring up on the managers. So we hang out at my place or at her place, recently we took a trip to CO to visit Kara. Her and Monel aren’t doing so hot.” Sara sighs

“When did you have the time to fly to Colorado?” Zari shouts, Charlie throws a pillow at her trying to shush her. Zari puts a fist up at Charlie and she simply winks

“Do you that remember that time I said I was going back to Star City to visit Laurel and Tommy?” Sara sheepishly smiles, Charlie and Zari throw a pillow at Sara in utter disappointment 

“Listen I've known Kara okay, and she asked for me--” 

“Are you sure Alex didn't just tell you that so you’d come?” Charlie wonders finishing unpacking her things 

“What was wrong between Kara and Monel?” Zari asks.

“It wasn’t good and that was last month, Monel wasnt even sleeping in the house. Kara couldn't talk about him without breaking down, but from what Alex has told me as well as Kara. They might’ve gotten married to early and that they shouldn't have rushed into it before getting to know each other. Monel from Alex’s point of view is a bit manipulative and emotional abusive. Before we left this weekend I helped Kara move in with Alex. I believe they are getting a divorce.” Sara explains sadly

“Fuck. That’s shit.” Charlie swears, shaking her head knowing that anybody with eyes can see that Kara was madly and deeply in love with that boy.

“Yeah, now I need a drink.” Sara comments not wanting to think about this situation. “I’m with yeah, lets head down for a bottle then head for the jacuzzi. Z are you down?” Charlie suggests, Sara nods grabbing a suit, starting to walk out of the room. She stop when she notices that Charlie isn't following her and the two are merely having a conversation by exchanging looks. 

“We’ll catch up with you captain.” Z salutes and Charlie shakes her head. Sara oddly nods her head. Sara changes and heads downstairs. In the other large room, Nora, Mona, and Ava are having a heavy discussion about the events of today.

“Ava you have to apologize.” Mona insists 

“I’ve tried and all she said was message received? What the hell does that mean?” 

“Mhmmmmmm you’ve got me there—Mo?” Nora turns to Mona who is slowly pacing the room, she goes for another 3 minutes before slowly turning to Ava.

“Do you like her?” 

Ava scoffs, “Of course I do she’s been one of my closest friends recently.”

“Not like that, do you like her?” Ava scoffs again turning to Nora for some help, she puts her hands up in defeat. Knowing that once you’ve got Mona’s ball rolling it’s best to not block her.

“It’s simples Ava, when you see her call you or text you do you get a weird feeling in your stomach. Do you oddly get excited when you hang out even though you probably saw each other the day before or two days ago? Do you feel like the biggest dick having said what you said and having to know that Sara heard it all.” Mona says in one breath shocking everyone in the room.

Ava is speechless, as well as Nora. Ava then clears her throat “Excuse me. I need some air” Ava ducks out of her room. She hears the two have a small argument but before she knows it she’s downstairs in the back balcony. Unaware that Sara is also out there in a hot tub by herself drinking. 

“Interrogation getting too much?” Sara speaks up scaring the shit out of Ava “Jesus—fuck.” Ava puts her hand on her chest, then turns to Sara who is still not looking at her and continues to sip her beer. 

“How did you know?” Ava questions walking towards the edge of the balcony looking around at the forest 

“Because I was getting same treatment why do you think I’m drinking at three o’clock in the afternoon—” 

“You do like the taste of scotch—”

“True but this is beer. Here.” Sara reaches for another beer and finally looks at Ava to hand her the beer. Ava sighs and happily takes the beer.

“To your weekend.” Sara puts her beer up

“To your dire band trip.” Ava chuckles and the two girls cheers

------

No kiss that night but here are the pics that they can’t share... ;)

Part 12/?

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#avalance #zarlie #darhkatom #ava sharpe #sara lance #zari tomaz #charlie jiwe #ray palmer #nora darhk #mona wu #nate heywood #john constantine #gary green #avalance social media au #social media au #legends of tomorrow #legends of tomorrow au