#OR VARIETY HOUR IF YOU LIKE NONSENSE GAME SHOWS

[spooky-dice]

sooo delightfully self indulgent to make a game changer ep where nathan drawfeeshow, papa caldy, and kiana pokemon yuri just draw silly things with appearances from ch hardly working guests and naddpod/d20 refs. this is infinity war for the dropout extended universe. and also ash ketchem is there.

#HI IF YOU GOT INTO DROPOUT THRU ACTUAL PLAYS YOU SHOULD WATCH DRAWTECTIVES ON DRAWFEE YOUTUBE #OR VARIETY HOUR IF YOU LIKE NONSENSE GAME SHOWS #caldwell n bleem dunking on murph sooo special 2 me #drawcrew on dropout plsss #also hiii kiana thank u for fueling my team rocket interest #drawfee #nathan yaffe #caldwell tanner #kiana mai #game changer #college humor #dropout

[archetypal-archivist]

A Kinder World AU- Part 11

Mike and Pac’s House

masterlist

Pac and Mike are a pair of young adults with a love for chaos, a deeper fondness for each other, and an utter distaste for anything resembling the stuffy atmosphere of university. As such, they've moved to Quesadilla island to work as fishermen alongside their longtime friend Felps while they try to figure out what they want to do with their lives. However, the introduction of Forever, Cellbit, and Forever's son Richarlyson have thrown a wrench into their plans and now they now find themselves titled not only as fishermen but as parents, alongside their more normal role of “horrible pranksters from the pits of hell, oh god why did you bring them with you Felps.”

1) Pac and Mike have been friends for years, having grown up and into each other such that they can't conceive of life without having both of them in it together. As such, their houses are really two smaller ones shoved together, an extra difficulty for Fit during the initial design process of building their home, but a necessary change all the same. The larger building their home is part of is known as the Favela, nicknamed by Forever upon seeing the monstrosity of stacked houses and rickety ladders that Felps had asked Fit to build for them when they all first moved there. It's a name that fits the structure well, not least because it's had problems weathering storms in the past much like the one that wrecked huge parts of it and left the Favela five homeless and couch surfing for a time. Fit blames Pac, Mike and the rest for skimping on paying for good materials, Felps and company blame him for not building it more structurally sound, but all can agree that the redesign after the worst of the storm had past looks much better than the initial draft.

2) Given their need to repay Fit for the property, Pac and Mike work long hours to earn enough to keep on top of the fees, with Pac leaving in the early mornings to fish out on the open water and coming back to trade the boat off to Mike, who takes the night shift and fishes by the light of the moon. On most days however, they’ll stay up a few hours at dawn and dusk to hang out with each other and the other Favela members. Both men are chronically sleep deprived and thus prone to the sillies, but it’s a welcome trade as they enjoy each other’s company too much to only see each other on weekends. Due to their nocturnal vs diurnal sleep schedules, Richarlyson thought for a long time that they were one person who could shapeshift or perhaps split into two beings like a cell committing mitosis. His curiosity prompted his dad Forever to stalk their front door with a camera to try and photograph the transition. Mike thought this was hilarious and convinced Pac to go along with the bit for a week before they showed up to  game night as two people instead of only sending Mike to play.

3) Pac and Mike are a pair of frighteningly intelligent people with horrible sleep schedules and a chronic prankster streak. As such, their rooftop is home to not only the local seagulls but also a wide variety of doodads, gizmos, and whatsits the likes of which the world has never seen and never really wanted to in the first place. Their inventions range from the useful, like “sonic flash bangs” and “turbo trawlers” to help with fishing, to the utterly nonsensical like Mike's hair-cutting bot that they made when Philza began complaining about his hair getting too long. It's not exactly safe to be up on the roof all the time, but Pac installed a harness and belay system that keeps the worst of the falls to something manageable. Pac and Mike also work on prank ideas too, and they are the instigators of Quesadilla's worst prank war to date, although they didn't end up the victors in the end- that honor goes to Richarlyson and his crack team of Luzu, Dapper, and Philza. The stories told about the final prank that ended it all are truly epic.

4) Since their houses were originally two that have since been squished together, the layout is more than a little atypical. The green portion of the house is an exact mirror of the blue portion, but flipped 90 degrees, and many of the rooms that are duplicates of intention and purpose keep much of their structure, even if the furniture has completely changed. For example, the green portion has what was clearly a bathroom at one point, tile floor included, but its current function is of a walk-in closet. The blue portion has a bathroom but no central living space, the room taken up by a miniature machinest's shop full of scrapped projects- the ragged sofas and half-deconstructed TV relegated to the green portion of the building. The only thing the house actually has two of is bedrooms but even that hasn't fully escaped. Given how often Mike and Pac stay up “late” talking and laughing together, it's not uncommon for the duo to end up passing out in the same bed unintentionally. This earns them some teasing from the rest of the Favela five but they laugh along with the rest of the crew- you can only wake up so many times with your best friend's feet in your face and your hand over their mouth to smother their snores before you find it funny too.

5) The second floor of their house is dedicated to their kitchen, which receives plenty of use, if not always by the duo themselves. After Cellbit’s injury that left  him unable to commit to his usual work, Felps moved them both to Quesadilla, picking up Pac and Mike to come along like two stray cats. Initially it was just to help their friend Cellbit move in, but upon seeing the community, Pac and Mike decided to stay and live with their friends. The quartet were incredibly close and when Forever suddenly arrived with his beleaguered son Richarlyson, they took pity on the kid and invited him and his dad to build a house alongside their own. Thus, the quartet became a quintet and Forever’s incredible love for good food led to the formation of daily meals together. Breakfast, lunch, or dinner, one meal a day is always held as a collective in someone’s kitchen and who’s turn it is to cook is a topic of hot debate. Pac and Mike’s kitchen is fairly standard, albeit with a few rube goldberg machines to do things like make toast, so they often will hold dinner for everyone, serving up oddly tasty pizza with even odder toppings. Sometimes they’ll even invite other members of the community to dine with them, although the faces they make when it’s Mike’s turn to cook are often a little funny. (Who thought it was a good idea to put canned corn on pizza?)

6) Because of the layered nature of the Favela houses, there isn’t much parking for everyone’s boats. As such, it’s a race every morning and evening to see who gets to park at the docks and who has to park elsewhere for the night. Given their sketchy schedules, Pac and Mike often get the short end of the stick and thus have taken to leaving their boat- a beautiful green and light blue vessel with a vicious motor and plenty of room for nets- in other people’s “front lawns” so to speak. They find it hilarious whenever someone stumbles out of their house, half asleep, and tries to drive off to go fish only for their key to not fit the keyhole as it’s not their boat. The only ones exempt from this practice are Rubius, Luzu, and Quackity as all of them will either prank the boat (the former 2) or hotwire it and drive off with it anyway (the latter).

#qsmp #mc #a kinder world au #my writing #quackity smp #townscaper #pactw #mikethelink #pac #mike

[stardomtrash]

From the Oedo Tai variety show. Bunch of silly nonsense so right up my alley. QQ celebrating winning the water bottle flipping game like they won the World Cup xD

Did I watch the entire hour without having a clue what they were saying? Do you even need to ask at this point?

#oedo tai #queens quest #😂

[zachsgamejournal]

COMPLETED: LEGO Star Wars: The Skywalker Saga

I did it, I beat the "story". While I had some fun, it ultimately felt like "work". I want to make a pass at grabbing all the collectables, but we'll see...

At this point I've played enough to ask the question: Is this a good game? Yes. Yes, it is. The graphics have a charmingly simplistic nature--which is the way of LEGO games--but the environments are very impressive: at times realistic. Besides the typical class system there's also the opportunity to buy class boosts which is an impressive addition. There's a story...from the movies. And while the voice acting is questionable at times, the movies were not well known for performances. There are tons of things to do, replay value, variety, and tons of extras. 

But then there's the other question: do I like it? Not...really. Being a good game isn't the issue. I just couldn't connect with this. The production was so focused on delivering a large galaxy of unique planets with movie-accurate aesthetics that it didn't have time to give much love to the main-line stories. I could respect this if there was hope that the side quests were going to be meaningful, but LEGO games have never been known for their meaningful side quests. They're fun and make a 12 hour game last 50 hours. But they're more interested in being silly than meaningful. 

This is why classic LEGO games worked. They took irreverent approach to retelling a familiar story. If you're familiar with the story, you don't need the story retold verbatim--instead you give some silly pantomime with LEGO-humor and people can laugh at the differences. Lord of the Rings succeeded with voice acting but cause it was taken from the film--so the story stayed true to its source. Skywalker Saga steps outside the story with unique voice acting. I was too distracted with how they got off track and what they left out to care about what they achieved. 

Anyway, some new observations: one, you can spam jump unlike what I thought earlier. I don't know why Hoth is screwed up. That's about it.

To my surprise, I enjoyed playing the original saga most. In the Complete Saga I prefer the Prequel Trilogy. The films tell a better, more epic story, and so the levels are more fun to me. because Skywalker Saga expands on the original stories with open-world gameplay, it actually makes the original stories a bit more epic themselves.

I was less impressed with the sequel trilogy. The Force Awakens is just goofy nonsense. That's JJ Abrams style. He likes to ask the questions but not answer them, which leads to a lot of wacky dramatic cliffhangers that are usually doomed to fail. Maybe I should blame his writers...doesn't matter. JJ Abrams makes disposable trash. It's entertaining, and connects with people, but it's like painting an ocean on the bottom of a kiddie pool. Anyway, Force Awakens is fun but it's a total retread and is more concerned with reintroducing you to your grandpa then breaking new Star Wars ground or significantly advancing the story and universe. Cause of that, many of the levels feel like retread: Oh I'm on a desert world, oh I'm in a Cantina, oh I'm blowing up a death star...

I was more looking forward to The Last Jedi--the best of the sequel trilogy and one of the best movies overall. But it doesn't translate well into a game. The opening works, obviously, but while following around Skywalker and facing one's nemesis across the galaxy is good cinematic storytelling it doesn't make for exciting gameplay. You mostly just walk around places. Oh well, still a great movie.

And then there's The Rise of Skywalker. Dumb. Just dumb. I feel like the goal of this film was to make as little sense as possible to prove Star Wars could make money whether it tried or not. It's really sad that this is how we end the "Skywalker Saga". There's a lot of great shows, like Andor, to help elevate the franchise. I'm hoping that this acts as the "end" of Star Wars' timeline so no one needs to watch it to make sense of any other media. But I don't know, Endgame made Thor 2 important--so there's that.

Because I didn't like the movie, there was no point in which Rise of Skywalker felt fun for me. It was just a final endurance boss preventing me from saying "I win". By the time the credits rolled I was already looking at my phone for random articles. 

So here I am, this is where I wanted to be. The story is "out of the way" and every class and planet is unlocked. Do I want to keep playing? Before I got here I thought yes, of course! I want to take this to the end! But now I'm just thinking of all the games I really want to play. I didn't love this enough to 100% it, and I didn't even 100% the Complete Saga (which I do love). 

My daughter wants to explore, so maybe I'll switch back to Oddworld for myself and then she and I can do bonus missions together.

--UPDATE--

Well good thing I didn't post this yet. I'm done with this game. Maybe if my daughter wants to play, we'll play. But for now I'm done. 

I tried to do side quests at Utapau and had not a great time. While the level seems to be pretty accurate to the film on which it's based, it wasn't very fun to get around. Sometimes I could only use a single ladder or other platformy way to climb to higher sections, but it wasn't fun to get up there and if you made a mistake hopping across rooftops, you had to do it all again. I ended up doing it alot. Also, there are missions that require you to travel to different planets to fulfill. I really wasn't interested. Maybe if this game was just "here's the Star Wars galaxy, have fun" I'd be ok with it. But having to go through the unexciting story aspects to unlock all the planets creates a barrier to that. 

I respect what they did and accomplished, but I'm not loving it.

#Zach's Game Journal #COMPLETED #LEGO Star Wars: The Skywalker Saga #Xbox One #Game Pass #Video Games #Gaming

[angelissa-x]

Tinykin Review

The demo for this game did not disappoint and left most fans wanting the full release and when it hit it too did not disappoint. It was free on Xbox Game pass which allowed a lot of fans to jump on the game very quickly and experience one of the most fun and brightly intriguing games of 2022. If you haven't experienced this game yet, add it to your list.

If you are a keen achiever or collector then this game is for you. There are many elements of collecting different kinds of Tinykins to enable you to either blow up things or get higher on the level to attain more Tinykins.

The story shows Milo arriving on the planet by following a signal to a nearby planet. Milo is guided throughout the game by Ridmi who talks about each section and the specific inhabitants whilst allowing access to each level when the previous one is completed.

Moving around the game is so smooth and the camera moves very well with each movement. In the game, you have access to a soap bar which acts as a skateboard like object for moving along tightropes in multiple different areas on each level. Alternatively, you also have access to a floating bubble, the timing on the bubble can be extended by visiting a specific Tinykin in each level and a ladder generated from the Green Tinykins which allows access to higher platforms (The more Tinykin you have the higher you go)

In order to access more Tinykin, you have to search for the Tinykin eggs throughout the map. When you run through these, Tinykins hatch and then follow you as seen in the image below. There are a variety of colours which all have different skills to give you what you need to complete each section

The average time of the game is around 6+ hours. For me, I am a bit of a collector and wanted to try and get everything I could therefore each level took between 1 - 1.5 hours. The games puzzles are sleek, easy to understand and complete with some effort and the colourful graphics and cartoon like nature of the animations make this game perfect for anyone.

If you are after a game you wish to fully complete or one where you can just sit and relax with a no-nonsense approach that you need to add this game to your library.

[lastchancevillagegreen]

Friday, 16 September 2022:

England Expectorates Julian Cope (Head Heritage) (released in 2022)

In 2003 a pair of Oi bands, Retaliator and Loyalty, released the double sided single titled England Expects. It seems likely considering Cope’s depth of knowledge about fringe bands and punk (I’m generalizing here, so excuse me) Cope probably has this single in his vast collection (if he even has a vast collection of anything but toy cars).  There was a CD collection of “over an hour of football anthems and terrace chants” released in the UK in 2006 titled England Expects.  I’ve already forgotten my knowledge of Cope and whether or not he watched football in the pair of autobiographies he wrote which I read earlier this year, but it seems if Cope took his new album’s title from anywhere, I’d go with the Oi double A single previously mentioned. 

Regardless, Julian Cope’s new album is hilariously titled England Expectorates.  I had not planned on getting this because I have been doing a catalog study of his music (I played his entire catalog this year from 1980′s Kilimanjaro by The Teardrop Explodes to 2020′s Self-Civil War) and if I learned nothing, I at least learned that I did not enjoy his endless political albums that came in the Aughts and have continued to this day.  Looking at the tracklist I just thought this would be more of the same and I wasn’t sure I wanted another album of Cope in his military uniform wielding his Kalashnikov rifle to the sky while looking intimidating and barking about how everyone is a dolt but him because he is so aware.  That’s what happens when you live in America where jackasses try and intimidate governors and police and citizens with their AK47s and their made up political lies, where nuts with guns are endlessly free to murder grade school children with the same AK47s and where a corrupt and bankrupt celebrity game show host believes he is the most important world leader ever there was.  After you’ve suffered these fools in your home country for over six years, Julian Cope becomes one of the same brand of knuckleheads. 

Yet, I was doing a complete catalog study of his music and how can I possibly ignore one more album that is brand new in the same year when I’ve listened to over 50 of his albums?  The answer is I couldn’t ignore it and besides, it cost me all of $25 (including shipping) from England.   I can suffer one more Cope album surely.  Above you will find the cover of the album, the inside of the jewel case when it is opened and the back of the album.

Below you will find the inlay tray which contain lyrics to one of the songs.

Turns out that this is one of Cope’s better political albums.  I’m hesitant to say why at the moment because I know my brother isn’t going to be able to play this until November.  But I think, much to my surprise, this is an excellent album for a variety of reasons, none of which I’ll explain here.  I’ve already played it far more than I ever expected to.  Two of the best songs are the two that scared me the most.  I’ve included shots of their lyric pages below.

That final track on the album is easily one of Cope’s jewels.  I know Jarvis Cocker did a similar thing using that particular word in regards to politicians and while I enjoyed the hell out of that song, I think Cope has bested Cocker.  But then Cope has a way with melody that exceeds most songwriters.  After all who on Earth could write a song titled All The Blowing-Themselves-Up Motherfuckers (Will Realize The Minute They Die That They Were Suckers) and make it so catchy that it becomes a sing along?  I don’t believe for 45 seconds that Paul McCartney or Bob Pollard could write that song.  This album has me once again wanting to know where Cope stands on the nonsense being endured in America.  After hearing this album so much I almost think I know.  Note that I said almost.

Below I close out with a close up of the CD.

[writerpeach]

Blind Date

LOONA Choerry X Male Reader

8153 words

---

Read on AFF

Read on AO3

masterlist

“Oppa, how long has it been since you’ve dated anyone?” Son Hyejoo asked, seemingly out of the blue as she loudly slurped on her milkshake, stirring the leftover contents with her large straw.

“I don’t know, Hyejoo. I don’t keep track of things like that.”

Hyejoo pointed her strawberry milkshake directly at you, unsatisfied with your answer. “Then that means it’s been too long,” she said, her triangle lips forming a pout.

You rubbed your forehead, knowing once she brought something up she wasn’t going to drop it.

“Why do I need to date anyone when I’m lucky enough to rail you every day?” you playfully replied, causing her nearly to choke on her frozen drink.

“Oppa, not so loud!” she said, kicking your shin. “I won’t be around all the time now that I’m starting a new job. And you need some variety in your life. You’re going to get tired of fucking me.”

“That’s impossible.”

You couldn’t say you agreed with her on that. Hyejoo was the perfect friend with benefits, beautiful big tits and perfect thick thighs, the prettiest mouth and the tightest pussy that you spilled yourself inside several times a day, you couldn’t imagine needing anything else.

“I know just the person to set you up with, oppa. She’s single and one of my closest friends, I think you’ll like her.”

“That’s really not necessary-”

Hyejoo wasn’t going to take no for an answer, refusing to back down as she grabbed her phone and swiped through it.

Finding what she was looking for she showed you her screen, an equally gorgeous girl that looked the same age as her with innocent eyes and a sweet smile.

“She’s cute, but you really don’t have to-”

“Nonsense, oppa. It’s time for you to stop being so needy and find a girlfriend,” Hyejoo said.

“Needy? Unless I’m forgetting something you’re the one who loves slobbering on my cock first thing in the morning,” you said.

“Hey! It’s called breakfast, and it’s not my fault you get so hard in the morning.”

“Actually, I’m pretty sure it is,” you said, as you were met with another kick to the shins.

“Ow!”

“It’s settled, I’ll set you two up on a blind date.”

“Blind date? But you just showed me her picture,” you said, tilting your head in confusion.

Hyejoo sighed audibly. “You’re hopeless, oppa. Don’t you want to know what she looks like?”

“O-of course, but-”

“No buts, oppa. Except hers, her butt is very nice,” she giggled, finishing up her milkshake.

“Don’t worry, she’s very sweet, I think you’ll get along well. Her name is Yerim and she always puts out.”

✦✦

“You look good, oppa,” Hyejoo said as she fixed the collar of your shirt.

You wiped your sweaty palms on the back of your pants as you took one more look in the mirror

“You smell good too. I told you that cologne was a panty-dropper," she said as her lips curled in a smirk.

You sighed loudly. “Hyejoo, I’m not meeting this girl just to get laid. You wanted me to get a girlfriend, right?”

"No, I'm pretty sure you wanted this, actually-"

Hyejoo pressed a finger against your lips. "Shush, oppa. Are you nervous?”

“Y-yes, it’s been years since I’ve been on a date.”

“Wanna have a quickie before? Burn all that stress all inside me?” Hyejoo jokingly said.

“...Are you serious?”

“Of course not, you can’t be dependent on me anymore, oppa. Plus, you need to save that load for Yerim.”

“Hyejoo!”

She smiled mischievously and patted your bottom, making sure nothing was out of place for your date.

“Have some confidence oppa, you’ll do great. Yerim will love you. Now get going, you don’t want to be late.”

✦✦

It was unusual for Hyejoo to put in this much effort, typically spending her days lazily on the couch checking her phone.

Everything was planned carefully. Hyejoo had picked the restaurant based on your favorite foods, the time, and the day, even showing up to your place an hour before to make sure you looked your best.

Keeping up with the notion of this being mostly a blind date, Hyejoo didn’t tell you much about Yerim. They shared the same age, although Yerim was months younger. They had a similar body type and lighter hair, and if you didn’t know any better you could have mistaken her for a younger sister.

You were still nervous about the date, but trusted Hyejoo’s judgement and hoped you were about to waste this opportunity that you had been given to meet a new girl. You took a deep breath as you stepped out of the taxi and headed into the restaurant, trying to calm your shaky hands.

The restaurant was larger than expected looking from the outside, equipped with a bar and seating area as you scanned around for your date.

“Good evening, sir. Do you have a reservation?” One of the hostesses asked, but before you had a chance to answer you heard an adorable voice interrupting.

“Over here!”

You were quickly blindsided by a cute girl that matched the picture that Hyejoo had shown you, abruptly wrapping her arms around in a tight hug.

She had a petite frame with brown hair, a tint lighter than Hyejoo and wore a modest black dress and heels with her hair styled perfectly.

“You’re Hyejoo’s friend right?” she asked, the smile on her face brighter than the sun.

“It would be a little awkward if I wasn’t now wouldn’t it?” you teased, gently nodding in response.

“Oh, well if you weren’t then I would just be hugging a cute stranger,” she said. “I’m Yerim.”

Cute? You thought to yourself as you were broadsided by this ball of happiness. “Come on, let’s eat!” she said, grabbing your hand as the hostess led you to your table.

You were both seated at a romantic candle-lit booth, letting Yerim sit down first as you took in the atmosphere of the restaurant. Hyejoo had picked the perfect place.

The waiter handed out menus and filled glasses to the brim with ice water as you looked over the laundry list of food, unsure what you were in the mood for.

“What’s good here?” Yerim asked the waiter, batting her eyelashes as her vocal tone grew higher.

“Our sushi and steak platter is very popular here. We have several different types to try paired with our signature sauces.”

“Steak? I love steak!” Yerim said, her mouth salivating just thinking about it.

“Me too. And sushi,” you said, as Yerim nodded to the waiter.

“I’ll bring it right out then,” the waiter said, scurrying away with a polite bow.

“I can’t wait!” Yerim said, licking her lips as she carefully unfolded and placed her napkin on her lap.

“It’s nice to meet you. Hyejoo has told me a lot about you!” she said, keeping a beautiful smile etched on her lips.

“Oh, has she? That seems a bit unfair, she didn’t tell me much about you. You’re much cuter than the picture she showed me.”

Yerim giggled as she opened her straw, placing it inside her glass and playing around with the ice cubes before taking a small sip, careful not to mess up her lip gloss.

The two girls were quite the contrast to each other. Hyejoo wasn’t one to care about most things, you found it difficult to pry her away from her gaming chair for anything but food and sex. Yerim on the other hand was hanging on your every word, finding any word you said the most interesting thing in the world without a hint of dishonesty.

Quicker than expected the food arrived, and you both dove in without hesitation, armed with chopsticks like a hunter stalking a prey.

The two opposing foods meshed perfectly. Raw sushi made with fish so fresh it might as well have been served directly out of the ocean, complimenting tender meat that literally melted in your mouth, cooked to perfection and seasoned, salted without excess. You swore you heard Yerim moaning out loud as she took her first bite.

Sharing food with a girl so full of energy was a wonderful experience, her company only adding to the delicious flavor. You were so focused on the fresh sushi that you barely had the capacity to register Yerim unapologetically taking the last piece of steak quicker than a deadly samurai and shoving it into her mouth proudly.

“Ah, you really must be Hyejoo’s friend,” you said sarcastically, frowning at her meat thievery.

"Mmm! There's nothing I love more than juicy meat in my mouth," Yerim said, without a hint of subtlety to her words.

She shamelessly went in for another piece of sushi, trying to add another piece of loot to her food heist as you quickly blocked her chopsticks with your own, denying her the satisfaction as you claimed the last spicy tuna roll for your own.

“Hey! That one was my favorite!” she protested, pursing her lips as her cheeks puffed as she watched the claimed prize disappearing into your mouth.

“Mine too! It was delicious,” you boasted, wiping your lips with the cloth napkin before folding it back on your lap. “I’m sorry, it was rude of me not to ask if you wanted the last piece.”

Yerim wasn’t one to stay mad for long, unfolding her arms as the signature brightness returned to her face. “The steak was better anyways,“ she said, giggling and sticking her tongue out.

Time flew by as you learned more about Yerim, hours had felt like minutes as they passed,

ending the meal with the biggest slice of cheesecake you had ever seen.

The waiter came by to drop off the bill as you scooped it up, not bothering to look at the total as the time spent with such an adorable human was priceless.

“Such a gentleman, aren’t you?” Yerim said, and you couldn’t quite tell if she was teasing you or not.

Leaving a generous tip, you walked Yerim outside the restaurant, both of you equally full from both the delicious food company as the temperature had dropped, the cool crisp air blowing every which way.

“Thank you for a fun night, Yerim. I’ll let Hyejoo know she picked well.”

Yerim’s cheeks reddened and tilted her head down shyly. “Ending the night so soon?” Yerim said, the disappointment in her voice clear as the night sky.

“Well, it’s getting late and I wouldn’t want to keep you up.”

“I don’t have a bedtime, silly,” she said, hitting your shoulder as the wind blew through her beautiful hair. The moonlight bouncing off her skin made her look even more gorgeous, illuminating her milky white skin.

Yerim closed the distance little by little until your noses were almost touching, letting you see the color in her beautiful round eyes.

“I had a really fun night too, but it doesn’t have to end here you know...” Yerim said, giving you a quick peck on your cheek.

Yerim was practically throwing herself at you as you gulped, swallowing down saliva nervously.

“Aren’t you going to invite a cute girl back to your place?” she abruptly said, taking charge of the situation.

You snapped out of it and weren’t going to let Hyejoo’s efforts go to waste. “O-of course. Would you like to go back to my place, Miss Yerim?”

“Of course! I thought you would never ask!”

The short taxi ride back to your place was filled with palpable sexual tension, neither of you muttering a word since you both left the restaurant. Yerim opted for her actions to speak for her as she rubbed your thigh the whole time.

You unlocked the door to your apartment and held the door open for Yerim as she stepped inside, swiveling her head as she looked around. She kicked her heels off and rubbed her feet, happy to be freed of them as her bare feet walked on the carpet.

“You have such a nice place. It’s cleaner than I expected.”

You didn’t know what that meant as you got comfortable, slipping your shoes off as you grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge.

“Would you like something to drink?”

“No, thank you. I’m fine,” she replied, awkwardly standing in the middle of the living room until you gestured for her to take a seat. Yerim sat down excitedly, pulling her dress down and crossed her legs as you sat down next to her.

Yerim turned her body towards you and placed a hand on your knee, her full attention yours for the taking as her bright doe eyes lit up.

“This was the first blind date I’ve been on,” Yerim said, leaning in close enough that you could smell her cherry shampoo.

“Me too. Did you have a good time?”

“Yes! I’m still full from all that steak.”

You felt weak in the knees at Yerim’s beauty, the possibility that such a beautiful girl existed seemed to be good to be true. You hesitated to make the first move, but Yerim had it covered as she mounted your lap, wrapping her legs around your waist.

You felt the electricity in the air as Yerim’s lips brushed against yours, meeting for the first time as the sweet taste of her entered your mouth, reminding you of an unforgettable candy.

“You’re so pretty,” you said, the kiss breaking after just a few seconds, leaving you longing for more after just a tease.

“Keep kissing me and I’ll let you see how pretty the rest of me is,” Yerim said, once again without any subtlety. Your hands snaked around her slim waist as your lips met again, her tongue introducing itself and playing around with your own.

“Not bad,” Yerim said as she came up for air, her eyes drunk on lust already. This close you were able to distinguish all the features of her face, her dead drop gorgeous eyes, her cute nose, her luscious lips, it was all a complete package.

“You’re really pretty, Yerim,” you said, complimenting her again as her face reddened and the pale color of her cheeks faded.

“T-thank you,” Yerim said, running a hand through her hair, trying to calm herself down.

“I wasn’t planning on dating anytime soon, but Hyejoo talked me into it. I even got this new dress for the occasion.”

“It looks really good on you.”

“Thank you! I think it’ll look even better on your floor, though,” Yerim said, trying to keep a straight face and failing miserably.

You had no response in return, suddenly rendered speechless but her forwardness.

“It’s my first time. You’ll be gentle, won’t you?” Yerim asked, the innocence in her sparkling eyes shining through.

“W-wait, really?” you asked. Hyejoo didn’t certainly mention something so vital, and Yerim had just dropped this so casually on you that you didn’t know how to react.

“Isn’t it every guy's fantasy to pop a girl’s cherry?” Yerim asked, as she bit the tip of her fingernail.

You scrambled for words to find when Yerim began giggling uncontrollably, trying to save the last of her charade as she placed her hand over her mouth.

“You’re cute when you’re nervous,” Yerim said, as you felt all the color fading from your face.

“Don’t worry, I’m not actually a virgin. I am a good girl though,” she said, as she started grinding herself on your lap.

“Are you? I don’t think this is what good girls do, Yerim,” you said, grabbing her waist to hold her in place.

“Of course! I’m always a good girl…”

“We’ll see about that.”

Yerim’s expression never changed, her eyes keeping the same innocent look in them as if trying to convince you of her words. You moved her hair out of the way and kissed her neck in several places, diving in and gently sucking on the sensitive skin that you found there, causing Yerim to gasp loudly.

“Take me to the bedroom. I think you’re getting excited,” she teased, as blood had begun flowing to your pants, causing an erection to form that she had felt.

“Are you sure about this?” you asked, her gorgeous face a hair's breadth away as you lose yourself in her eyes.

Yerim nodded without hesitation, cupping both sides of your face and swiping her tongue against your lips, taking one more tender kiss, the taste of her lips lingering.

“Yes, I want it. I want you to fuck me,“ she whispered into your ear, her expression finally changing as her eyes opened wide. The innocence was gone, swallowed up by lust as she dismounted your lap and stretched her arm out as you led her to the bedroom.

“Wow, so this must be where you and Hyejoo have all your fun together?” she said, exploring the large bedroom with her eyes.

“Here, the bathroom, the shower, the couch, the kitchen counter…”

Yerim feigned surprise for a moment, stopping at the foot of the bed. “Where are we going to have fun together?”

“Wherever you would like.”

“We can start here,” Yerim said, closing the distance and went in for another makeout session as her slender fingers unbuttoned your shirt, fingers tracing your chest.

“Hyejoo left the part out about you having such a nice body,” Yerim said as she planted a wet kiss on your chest, slipping your shirt off your body as she tossed it away.

“Can’t let her spoil everything about me can we?” you said, exploring her body with your hands, cupping her backside with both hands and grabbing a handful of cheeks.

“It’s my turn then,” Yerim said, turning away from you and letting you see the backside of her little black dress. “Help a girl out?”

You let out a deep breath as you approached, grabbing the top of her zipper’s dress and pulled it down in one smooth movement, exposing her bare back. Yerim turned back around with the shyest of smiles, slipping the dress off her body as it piled at her feet.

Yerim rested her hands on her wide hips, presenting her tight body that was more mouthwatering than the meal you shared earlier. Underneath her dress she had on a cute purple bra, showing a hint of cleavage with matching underwear as she spun around and let you see her the thin piece of fabric nestled in between her delicious asscheeks.

The curves of her body competed with that of Hyejoo minus a smaller chest, competing where it mattered with delicious succulent thighs that you couldn’t wait to get your hands on.

“Like what you see?”

“I do. Is this what good girls wear?” you asked as you pulled her in close, hands wandering around before finding her backside again, squeezing her ass firmly.

“Y-yes! I’ll show you what a good girl I can be,”

Her eyes were filled with excitement as she kept them on you the entire time as she slowly lowered to her knees, staring at the bulge in your pants now at eye level.

“Can I?” Yerim asked with widened eyes, demonstrating her ability to wait for permission as she patiently waited. You gave the go ahead with a simple nod, and she swiftly undid your pants, yanking them down to your ankles as the bulge in your boxers became more prominent.

Yerim was quick to free your shaft from its constraints, hooking her fingers into the waistband of your boxers as she divested them from your body. Blood had rushed to your throbbing shaft as it was freed, almost smacking Yerim’s adorable face as it was met with the cool air.

“Wow...” Yerim said as your revealed cock met her gaze, hungrily admiring every last inch of it as she couldn’t keep her mouth closed. Her fingers wrapped around it, forming a tight fist and pumped up and down slowly, precum dripping out of your slit already as you throbbed in her hand.

Yerim had no time to waste, giving a few soft kisses on your tip as she flattened her tongue at the base of your cock, painting slow upward strokes with her wet tongue, swirling against your leaking slit and collecting every drop.

“Mmm, yummy!” she said, and without hesitation she parted her lips with your shaft, taking you into the warmth of her mouth, sucking on your swollen sensitive tip.

“Oh... f-fuck,” you moaned out, your toes digging into the carpet as the pleasure took over, shooting up your spine. Yerim’s mouth was nothing but pleasurable, delivering radiating warmth as her puckered lips wrapped around your shaft, feeling like the softest silk as she applied a delicate suction and hollowed her squishy cheeks.

You looked up at the lights for a second, trying to distract yourself from the intense feeling of Yerim’s lips sucking you off. It didn’t help much, especially when you felt her warm mouth unexpectedly move deeper, causing you to moan loudly.

You almost regretted looking down, watching as Yerim bobbed her head up and down as she slurped on your shaft, retreating her mouth back when half of you entered her mouth as her playful tongue ran along the sensitive underside of your cock.

“God, that feels amazing,” you said, placing a hand on the back of her head, both to guide her movements and to give yourself a necessary outlet. Yerim took this as encouragement, swiftly sliding her lips up and down your throbbing shaft, leaving behind a trail of glistening warm saliva in her wake.

Yerim looked up, showing the hunger in her eyes, spitting leftover saliva as she furiously stroked your cock.

“Does that feel good, daddy?” she asked, your cock twitching in her small hand, answering for you. Hyejoo had told her one of your little secrets it seemed.

“Please fuck my face, daddy. Fill my throat with this nice cock,” Yerim pleaded, letting any last remnants of innocence slip away.

It was hard not to be taken aback by her filthy words that didn’t match her cute features, but you’d be lying if the juxtaposition didn’t send your arousal level skyrocketing.

Taking control of your shaft you rubbed your tip on her soft warm lips, pushing yourself back into the intoxicating warmth of her mouth. You guided Yerim deeper by pushing the back of her head down until her lips met the base of your shaft. With minimal effort you entered her throat, hitting the back of it as it tightened around you and caused her to gag loudly. You instinctively began to withdraw, but the look in her eyes suggested otherwise.

You grabbed both sides of her head, moving gently as strands of dark hair wrapped around your fingers as you thrusted in and out of her warm mouth, gradually testing her limits. Yerim kept gagging as your tip stuck the back of her throat, but gave no signal she wanted you to stop, her lustful gaze suggesting the opposite.

It didn’t take long for your self control to vanquish itself, carnal desires taking over as you took pleasure from Yerim, fucking her mouth furiously and slapping your balls against her chin as her round eyes began watering with tears.

“Such a good girl. You like being used like this?” you asked, Yerim unable to answer but smiling with a mouth full of cock, slurping and gagging on every inch of throbbing hard flesh.

You never stopped your rough treatment of Yerim’s pretty mouth, ruining her makeup that was no doubt meticulously put on as she tried to tame her gag reflex to no avail. You could see by her watery eyes how much she was enjoying this, dripping down her thighs as she kept her mouth open for you to encourage your forceful use of her throat.

Yerim’s hands didn’t stay idle as they worked the clasp of her bra, discarding it from her body to free her perky tits, only strengthening your erection. She held on to your thighs to brace herself, slobbering on your shaft as you kept her throat filled, taking every thrust like a champ as messy drool spilled out of her lips and coated her bare chest.

Your senses were overwhelmed as Yerim had been turned into a mess, her beautiful face now stained with tears and drool, hair disheveled and out of place. You couldn’t keep this pace up for much longer or you were liable to finish much sooner than you wanted to, forcing her head down and holding her there for several seconds before mercifully withdrawing your shaft from her messy mouth.

Yerim came up for air with several loud gasps, messy strands of spit connected your glistening wet shaft to her smiling lips.

“You really are a good girl,” you said, using your stiff cock and slapping her face several times with your wet shaft as she continued grinning from ear to ear.

"I wasn't lying…"

“I want you on the bed. I’m still a little hungry.”

"Of course, daddy!"

Yerim was quick to obey as she climbed up and crawled on the bed, lying flat on her back as she spread her legs for you, offering herself up like a scrumptious meal.

"Come taste me, daddy," Yerim beckoned, biting her lip as she rubbed her pussy through her skimpy panties, showing off the wet spot staining the front of her crotch that only grew the more she touched herself.

Yerim's perfect body was almost fully unwrapped for you, and you couldn’t take anymore and needed to see every inch, wanting to get in between those thighs you couldn’t stop staring. You joined her on the bed and peeled her panties off without hesitation down her sexy legs, revealing her bare pussy and the prettiest set of lips that were dripping with arousal.

"Beautiful," you said as you laid flat on your stomach, positioning yourself and spreading her legs wider as Yerim blushed in response.

“T-thank you, daddy.”

You grew tired of staring and wanted to take action, planting several kisses on Yerim’s bare thighs in different places, never putting your lips on the same part of skin twice. She squirmed at your touch as you teased her, placing your mouth dangerously close to her pussy but refusing to touch her center.

"D-daddy, please-"

“What is it, baby? What do you need?” you asked, swiping your tongue against her luscious thighs to taste her creamy skin, lapping up juices that had already spilled out of her core and sampling them.

“Eat my pussy, p-please, daddy.”

“You’re cute when you beg. I’m gonna make you do more of that,” you said, lowering your head in between her open legs and giving one slow swipe of your tongue against her pink dripping slit.

"O-oh f-fuck, daddy," Yerim moaned as you gave several licks repeatedly, exploring her wet tolds with your tongue. You slipped your tongue inside her juicy pussy, gathering her delicious nectar on your tastebuds and gave a few swipes against her cilt before sucking on it.

"Your pussy tastes so fucking good,” you said, slurping on her swollen clit as you felt the warmth of her thighs on either side of your face, wrapping around your head and squeezing. You looked straight into Yerim’s round, lust-filled eyes as you ate her out, watching her bliss overtake her features as you lapped up all her leaking juices, drinking up every drop.

“F-fuck, you’re really good at that,” Yerim cried out, her hips bucking with a mind of their own. You brought a finger inside her dripping wet cunt, then a second short after, thrusting into her tight little hole as you kept your lips secured around her swollen clit, slurping harshly on it.

“That feels so good, o-oh my god, please d-don’t stop, daddy…”

Yerim grew wetter and wetter, your fingers being drenched with her slick as you messily ate her out, her thighs squeezing your head tighter as her breathing became shallow. You kept eye contact as your fingers plunged to the hilt, the warm walls of her cunt squeezing your wet fingers, not letting you go.

“J-ust like that, I’m so c-close, f-fuck!”

You kept firm pressure on her clit as her moans grew stronger and longer, lips suckling harshly on her sensitive nub as you helped her chase what she was desperate for, drinking in her nectar as it filled your mouth.

“D-daddy, I-I’m going to cum!”

Yerim suffocated you with her thighs as you kept your lips on her clit, fucking her with your fingers without mercy as grabbed onto your head, pushing you deeper into her delicious pussy as she couldn’t take it any more.

“O-oh, oh my god, daddy, I’m cumming!”

Yerim’s muscles tensed up as her toes curled, flooding your mouth with her sweet succulent honey. Her hips bucked uncontrollably as you helped her hit her peak, her thighs trembling around your head, smearing her juices all over your lips and chin, drowning you with her pleasure.

It was loud and messy, an unforgettable clmax for Yerim as you helped her come down from it gently, slurping with less force and removing your lips from her sensitive clit. Your fingers however, stayed deep inside her as her thighs lost the power they held around your head.

“I want you to cum again for me,” you ordered, pumping your fingers furiously inside her dripping tight hole, her wetness sucking you in.

“I-I can’t, p-please, daddy, I’m still sensitive…”

“You said you’re a good girl didn’t you? I want you to cum one more time.”

You had no plans of letting up, both fingers buried to the hilt inside Yerim’s pussy, keeping up the stimulation on her body as you felt her cunt pulsating again. The wet squelch of her warm hole filled the room as you never stopped moving, keeping her pussy filled as tears welled up in her sparkling eyes as you demanded another orgasm out of her.

“Cum for me, baby, I know you can do it. One more time, I want to see how wet you can really get.”

“P-please, I-I, f-fuck, o-oh fuck!”

Yerim was a beautiful squirming mess, her thighs covered in her own juices as she let out desperate gasps and moans, the intense stimulation overwhelming her body and all her senses.

“D-daddy, p-please!”

You weren’t planning on stopping until you got what you wanted and what Yerim deserved. Your wrist felt like it was on fire as fingers were kept curled inside her heat, moving frantically with one goal in mind.

Yerim barely had time to register the growing knot in her abdomen, still focused on the intense aftershocks running throughout her body that she quickly came without warning. Her orgasm was much stronger as slick juices gushed out of her sensitive pussy that forced your fingers out of her as she squirted all over you and the bed, staining the sheets and leaving a dark mess on the bed.

Yerim shook uncontrollably as her second consecutive orgasm winded down, you helped her out by caressing her thighs to calm her down, rubbing her pussy with your palm.

“P-please, s-stop, I can’t take anymore, p-please,” she begged, and you had your fill, ceasing any form of contact as her sounds of gasping heightened, her chest uninterruptedly heaving up and down.

“Good girl. Are you okay?” you asked, making a show of cleaning your fingers off with her juices.

“Y-yes, I’m fine, daddy. That was intense, I’ve never had anyone do that before,” she said, struggling to form full syllables.

You patiently waited for Yerim to regain her composure, giving all the time she needed. It took several moments for the trembling in her body to control itself, as the lustful gaze in her eyes returned, and you knew that meant she was ready for the next step.

“Will you fuck me now, daddy?”

“If you insist,” you replied, getting into position as your knees pressed against the still drenched sheets as you maneuvered in between her spread thighs. Yerim pushed her knees up and feet flat on the mattress as the anticipation of what you both desired was at an all-time high.

Gazing into her eyes with your cock in hand, you eagerly lined yourself up with Yerim’s pussy, sliding in between the warm flesh of her drenched pussy lips, stalling your desires to enter her body. You parted her folds, playing with her slippery flesh and refusing to do anything else but tease her entrance.

“P-please, put it inside me, daddy. I’ve been a good girl.”

“You have, but I want you to beg for it. Beg for me to fuck you.”

Yerim whined audibly as your cock loitered around her inviting opening, spreading her juices around and denying her the pleasure she desperately sought. It wasn’t going to be that easy for you to give in.

“P-please, please fuck me, daddy. I’m so wet, I need to feel your cock inside my tight little pussy!”

“I don’t think you really mean it,” you said, watching the desperation in her eyes as you slapped her clit with your cock. Yerim squirmed as you nudged the tip of your cock against her hole, teasing penetration but stopping at the last moment, leaving her unsatisfied and empty.

“P-please! I can’t take it anymore, please fuck me, daddy!”

You felt like you could go on like this forever, but your own self-control was being tested as the more you teased her the more you wanted to be inside her. Yerim continued to plead and beg, reduced to a desperate whiny mess and starving for cock as you looked straight into her eyes and slid inside her in one smooth stroke, parting the wet hungry lips of her cunt.

“O-oh my god.”

Yerim opened her mouth to let out a moan, her eyes struggling to stay open as flesh entered inside her. She tilted her head back as she was finally given what she craved as the tip of your cock disappeared inside her heat. Yerim was overwhelmingly tight, her walls suffocated your cock and you wanted to savor such an unforgettable feeling for as long as you could, lazily moving your hips.

You started out slowly, wanting Yerim to earn every single thrust. Her silky wet walls felt heavenly around your shaft, her warmth so intoxicating as you slid in and out of her pussy at a gingerly pace. She felt so wet, so hot, so tight inside that you couldn’t help but keep your pace slow at first, wanting to drown in all the intense sensations that flooded your body.

“Your pussy feels so amazing,” you said, as Yerim’s body tested your patience as you slid an inch deeper at a time, until you had bottomed her out. Her wetness was so prominent that you were able to move inside her effortlessly, her messy juices lubricating your sluggish thrusts.

“Do you like how tight I am, daddy? I’m much tighter than Hyejoo aren’t I?” Yerim asked as she adjusted to your length, keeping her desperate eyes glued to your own as you began to move more forcefully inside her, fueling your desires to give her everything and more.

“You’re so big, daddy. I want to be pounded senseless, ruin me please!”

“You have such a dirty little mouth don’t you, baby? I’m starting to think you aren’t a good girl after all,” you told her, upping your pace and fucking her harder as you grabbed her warm thighs, slipping into the wet depths of her hot constricting cunt.

Yerim feigned the hint of surprise on her face as she moaned, arms by her side and holding on to your bed sheets as she relaxed into the mattress.

“T-that’s not true, daddy. I’m not a bad girl…”

She struggled to keep her eyes open as pleasure took control of her body, and you felt no need to hold back and began pistoning your hips, pounding her pussy and stuffing her full of cock.

“I don’t think you’re a good girl. But I think you’re a little slut,” you said as you gave her the hardest thrust of the night, making her gasp at how deep your cock fit inside her.

“I-I’m not a slut, I’m a good-ah!”

Yerim’s denial was interrupted as you lifted her luscious legs into the air, draping them over your shoulders. You were able to hit spots you couldn’t before, thrusting carelessly into her pussy as the bed became an orchestra of noisy squeaks and audible moans.

“O-oh fuck, right there! just like that, daddy!”

You had no plans on stopping now that Yerim had unshackled the chains of desire, hugging her legs while your hips went wild as you drove yourself repeatedly into her comfortable warm hole.

It was impossible to concentrate on anything else with how good she felt and the never-ending wetness that smothered your shaft as you established a perfect rhythm and looked directly into Yerim’s eyes as you stretched her out.

“Such a good little slut, taking this cock so well,” you hissed, feeling her pussy clench around your cock at the second use of the word she swore she wasn’t, her body betraying her. Yerim let out wordless gasps and moans as you kept the momentum up with no end in sight.

Yerim’s moans grew and grew as your rhythm sped up, her flushed skin becoming warmer to touch as you kept her filled airtight, her walls pulsating around your drenched shaft.

“You’re going to cum again?”

“Y-yes, I’m so close! Please don’t stop…”

“You can’t. Not until you admit what a slut you are.”

“B-but I’m not...I’m a good girl I promise!” she said, desperately trying to keep up the act.

You slowed down your thrusts at the result of her defiance, practically at a standstill, resting inside her.

“N-no, wait! P-please, I’m so c-close. Let me cum, please, let me cum, daddy.”

You refused until she gave you want you wanted, only thrusting into her body every few seconds, driving her crazy.

“Say it. Tell me and I’ll make you feel better than you ever have before.”

Yerim was left with no other options, frustratedly grabbing on to the sheets as the fire in her abdomen kept burning.

“I’-I’m a slut. I’m a needy little slut that needs to cum!”

“No, you’re a good little slut. Now cum on my cock,” you corrected, reestablishing your pace and driving every inch of hard flesh inside her. Her walls clenched almost painfully tight, her wetness growing as you pounded her into the mattress.

“D-daddy, I-I’m cumming!”

Yerim’s orgasm didn’t dawdle, her toes curling into the sheets as her back arched, taking every inch of flesh into her wet pussy. You fucked her straight through her strongest orgasm of the night, her legs shaking in your hands as she came hard. If your sheets weren’t ruined before she made sure they were.

“Good little slut” you purred, letting her legs drop from your shoulders gently as your pace slowed down, caressing her face as her glazed over eyes could barely stay open.

“D-don’t you need to cum too, daddy?” Yerim asked with several shallow breaths, doing her best to form a sweet smile. You leaned forward and kissed her, tasting the cherries on her lips and watched her chest slowly heaving up and down, almost hypnotizing you.

“Not yet. I’m not done having fun with you.”

Letting her rest for a moment you slowly withdrew from her drenched pussy, watching your shaft glistening with her juices in the lights as you left her body empty, whines escaping her lips. Hands on her hips you nudged her as she turned over, getting on her hands and knees.

Yerim settled into position, displaying the naked curves of her body, ripe for the taking. She granted you all access to her delicious bent over body, her head resting on the mattress and her plump ass raised in the air.

Her pretty pink lips were still splayed open after your treatment of her, but you were just getting started, rubbing your painfully hard shaft between her warm buttcheeks as you prepared yourself to enter her pussy.

Yerim’s skin was so soft as you used her cheeks to massage your throbbing shaft, you couldn’t take much of being outside her. Not wasting time you lined yourself back up with her tight hole, poking against her entrance again with no plans to keep her waiting, needing to find yourself buried in her smothering warmth.

Taking a deep breath you looked at the pleading look in Yerim’s eyes as she patiently looked over her shoulder. You popped your hips and slid in an inch inside her dripping heat before letting the rest sink inside.

Yerim gasped as her pussy swallowed up your cock hungrily and refused to let you go, enveloping you in a familiar warmth and wetness as she lowered her head, fingers wrapped around in your sheets.

“Such a tight little slut, aren’t you? You want daddy to pound this tight pussy?”

“Yes, daddy! Don’t hold back this time, okay? I can take it!”

There wasn’t any reason not to give Yerim just what she asked for as you placed your hands on her supple cheeks, squeezing the soft flesh and kneading it, pressing your fingertips into her warm flushed skin.

“Fuck me!”

Yerim was just every bit demanding as your mutual friend and fuckbuddy Hyejoo, and if she wanted to be treated the same you were going to oblige her. She was all yours and you were going to make the most of it as you started at a rapid pace, finding a harsh rhythm and drove yourself deep inside, making her scramble for a tighter grip on the sheets.

“You’re so fucking wet. Good girls definitely don’t drip all over my cock like this.”

Yerim couldn’t find a response, answering back only in lustful erotic moans as you increased your pace, moving your hands to her wide hips and squeezing her flesh hard enough to bruise in the morning.

“Harder! F-fuck me harder, daddy, please!”

“Since you asked so nicely…”

Yerim so impossibly tight that it almost hurt as you plunged every single inch of flesh in her, making sure your hips smacked against her big ass, causing her plump cheeks to ripple in time with your thrusts as she arched her back high.

“Oh f-fuck, you’re so deep! H-harder, daddy!”

“So needy,” you said, gripping her hips even tighter to pull her back against your cock, slamming into her pussy without mercy and using no wasted movements. You flattened your palm and gave her beautiful tight ass a hard smack that echoed across the room.

Her pussy clenched in response as she let out a loud gasp, and you gave her another slap on the other cheek as her walls tightened around you, threatening to push you out of her body.

“F-fuck!”

“So you’re a slut that loves to be spanked, huh? Hyejoo left out so many things,” you said, smacking her ass repeatedly in the same spot until you left a faint handprint on her pale skin.

“Y-yes! I’m a naughty little slut that loves to be spanked and used!”

Your smacks against her plump ass grew harder, her tender flesh rippling with each flick of your wrist. Yerim’s walls clenched each time you smacked her delicious ass, the mixture of pain and pleasure causing her natural juices to flood down her thighs.

“P-please don’t stop!” Yerim begged, looking back at you with desperation as you saw tears had formed in her eyes. You gave a brief moment of respite, massaging the sore reddened skin until she signaled she was ready for another round.

You struck her cheeks with more force, winding your arm back to deliver slap after slap, making sure you hit the same part of her ass as found the handprints that made such an easy target. Her sensitive skin grew a brighter shade of red with each smack, each harsh slap made her wetter and wetter.

You looked down at your handiwork, your cock disappearing into between bright red buttcheeks that you found it impossible not to want even more out of her body as you pulled her arms behind her, grabbing her dainty wrists with a tight grip.

“I’m really going to fucking ruin you,” you growled, pounding away into Yerim as if it a fire had just been lit inside you, dropping all sense of self control as your animalistic urges took over.

You were anything but gentle, fucking Yerim with the harshest thrusts your body could give. Shortly after sweat began to drip down your forehead, misting over Yerim’s naked back.

“Th-that’s so good, you’re fucking me so well, daddy!”

Yerim could barely keep it together, her pussy dripping like a faucet as she found it hard to think straight, all thoughts ceased except the hard throbbing cock ravaging her cunt without any care.

“F-fuck, d-daddy! You’re gonna make me cum again!”

Your breathing grew as shallow as hers, the loud slap of hot flesh against hot flesh filled your ears alongside Yerim’s lustful moans as your hips smacked her ass, your sweaty bodies clinging together.

“Cum for me. Cum again for me you greedy little slut.”

It only took until your sentence had ended. Yerim was teetering on the edge and your words and actions pushed her over it, unable to control herself any longer she selfishly took her fourth climax of the night. It was the weakest of the bunch but still no less satisfying, toes curling in the mattress as her orgasm jerked her whole body, and had you not had control of her arms it would have been easy for her to fall face first into the mattress.

Her wet hot pussy squeezed your cock so hard that you prepared yourself to follow in her footsteps, giving into the mind-numbing pleasure and released the grip on her wrists. Your hands found their rightful place on her hips as you pounded her pussy as long as you both could stand it.

“I-I’m gonna fucking cum too. Where do you want it?”

“Yay! Cum inside me, daddy! Please, I need my pussy filled so badly, p-please!”

You had just enough time to wait for her response, your body not waiting much longer, finding it harder and harder to breathe and it was impossible to leave the warmth of her silky dripping cunt.

Looking down between your legs, you used all your remaining energy as your cock disappeared in between her cheeks, no longer fighting the urge to hold back anything as the sweat on your bodies increased, as did the harsh sounds of your bodies slapping against one another.

You reached your peak with ease thanks to the vigorous use of Yerim’s body. It was just too much to handle as your pulsating shaft erupted inside her, moaning loudly and sending shot after shot of thick semen into the suffocatingly tight walls of her heavenly wet pussy.

Using all the energy you had left you finished up your final thrusts, slowing down the movement of your hips and ensuring not a drop was left. You were both exhausted, tired gasps and heavy panting filled the room but you couldn’t help but give her backside one more squeeze as your cock rested inside her.

“You came so much...it’s so warm…”

Once your senses had recovered and you withdrew an inch at a time as your depleted cock slipped out of Yerim’s freshly fucked pussy, leaving a stream of thick milky cum leaking out of her that dripped down her thighs, mixing with the already prevalent juices that had ruined your bedsheets.

You had just enough energy to let your tired self plop on the tortured mattress, Yerim crashing on top as your sweaty bodies melded together in a mess of limbs.

“That was amazing…” Yerim managed to mutter out, drained syllables barely leaving her sweet lips in a coherent sentence, her head resting on your chest while you draped an arm over her back, pulling her in tight.

“Do you want to clean up? My shower is big enough for two,” you said, making Yerim drip between her messy thighs again as you fixed strands of sweaty disheveled hair out of place.

“I can barely move,” Yerim giggled, flashing a weak smile.

“Don’t move then. Take all the time you need.”

“This was a wonderful date. Thank you, daddy.”

Yerim quickly fell asleep in your arms, out like a light. You were about to follow her until a buzz on your nightstand interrupted you from doing so.

Hyejoo deserved some credit, and you’d had to thank her in the morning. For now all you could do was drift away to sleep, thankful for the amazing night with Yerim and also that she wasn’t a snorer.

#loona smut #choerry smut #loona #choerry #reader insert #male reader #kpop smut #kpop fanfic #kpop fanfiction

[bonvoyagenoona]

Oh I have a question. Who buys you lingerie and then fucks you in it? Who tears you out of it to get skin on skin? 👀

Aaahh, hi Suzie!! Your question has been received! Hope this satisfies...

Roomie and Roomie’s Wifey, I think we gotta tag-team this one! 😶 @mochilatae @purgatorywriter enlisting your help!

Q: Who buys you lingerie and then fucks you in it? A: Jimin, Jin, Yoongi

Jimin loves to play dress-up! Just like with his drawer of collars, he’ll have a whole section of his closet devoted to you, all sorts of pretty things hanging in wait for the next time you’re going to play. Different fabrics cutting you into different shapes. He’ll do his best not to make a mess on you, tongue and fingers roving, cock sliding against satin and silk and cotton and lace. But even when we do our best, we fall short. He always ends the night with you under him, his hands cradling the sides of your head, after hours of exploring, only to come home to you, pumping gently but fully, telling you how nothing you wear compares to how beautiful you are, eyes deep as his stroke.

In the crooks of Jin’s arms swing shopping bags with fancy names scrawled in delicate, cursive print. And inside those bags are little gifts for you, which are really little gifts for him. He wants only you, but he wants a different shade of you every night. Promiscuous with a hint of danger. Sweet with a hint of naughtiness. Defiant with a secret need to submit. He loves watching you get lost in the roles your costumes bring. As he drives home with the latest haul, he won’t be able to keep his mind from racing, and his hand sliding up and down his length. The red one tonight, he’ll think, a smile spreading across his face. He’s going to fuck you so hard that that’s all you’ll see. And you still have no idea.

Yoongi loves buying things for others to wear, and he loves the back and forth you bring him:

He loves this cat-and-mouse game that you play. You just worked a full day. There’s no way you’re going to slip into whatever latex nonsense he just got you. But when his playful pout finally gets to you, you give in, like you always do. As you feel it slide across your skin, you imagine that it’s his tongue. And you feel his tongue trace its outline as he delicately peels it off of you, unboxing you so carefully and staring with wide, appreciative eyes for every curve and line of your body. He takes his time, each piece, the bralette, the panties, the gloves, the straps, taking hours to make its way to the floor. And the things he’ll do in those stretches of time. Slippery, steamy, sticky, a stroke so intense, that he makes last and last. As he fucks you and you shed your second skin, you’ll feel so renewed.

Bonus Q: Who wears the lingerie you buy for him? A: Jin, Jimin, Jungkook, Namjoon

I love that Jin is so game to try anything:

He’ll put anything on. Booty shorts. Suspenders. He’ll even put on the red number he bought you. After you’ve worn them, when your scent is still on them. He’ll put on the parts that fit. The parts that don’t. You’ll lick the parts that show. The parts that don’t. The parts that are barely covered. He’ll moan so loudly when you take him into your fingers, mouth, cunt, fisting the cloth and biting his lips at the contrast of flesh against fabric. How do you give him everything at once?

Jimin expects gifts in return. He’ll treasure the variety of things you buy him, especially everything -less. Ass-less. Crotch-less. Anything that gets more of him inside of you. Knowing the parts that you want to draw your eye to makes him shine that much brighter. He’ll give you that much more of them, bending you over, lifting you up, grinding into you so that your skin gets rug burns from whatever it is that you bought. And then he’ll kiss and lick those wounds, part sorry that they’re there, but mostly happy at the added treasures that commemorate the evening.

Jungkook is just so darn curious. He’s used to throwing on whatever the stylists give him, and when he saw how everyone reacted to his corset, he knew he’d have to try it again. But he’s shy. He wants to try it just with you. And he wants to try it in a setting where he feels as sexy as he did with all those adoring eyes on him. So he gasps excitedly when he discovers you’ve stolen the corset from the Black Swan MV. And he giggles as you tie him up, hard body clenching against the hard shell. You revel in his look, and when he finally settles his giddy ass down, you’ll swear that the corset does something to empower him. He pounds into you from behind as if he’s suited up for a job to accomplish. You’ll roll over, and you’ll run your hands along the outline, grazing his skin and making him smirk to fight those tickles. And then, after you both come, he’ll find it hard to breathe. Before he passes out, you’ll help him out of it, running your hands up and down his torso, bathing in his sweat. “That was fun,” he’ll sigh. “I’ll wanna do it that again. What about those harnesses we wear sometimes...?”

At first, you’d think Namjoon would be more the “I bought this for you, now wear it” type. But look at him in that photoshoot. He’s so down for experimentation, but whatever he wants to try, he lets himself try first before asking you to do it, too. He’ll keep Jungkook’s secret, but instead of stealing things home from MV shoots, he’ll ask you to buy him something. Lace. Start with briefs, maybe. And he’ll take more specific notes about his experiences with you. He doesn’t know what it is about lace. Maybe it’s because he likes the way it looks and feels so soft and feminine against his huge, masculine body. Maybe it’s because he likes the scratch it gives when you’re fucking while he’s wearing it. Maybe it’s because he likes the way he thinks you’ll look in it too. “Will you try with me, noona?” he’ll ask. Damn if you don’t say yes before the question is out of his mouth.

What do you think, @mochilatae ? Q: Who tears us out of it? @purgatorywriter, what do you see? Q: What kind of lingerie do we end up buying on a shopping trip with each member?

More Important Questions

#important questions #lcksndkys #asks #memes and games #mochilatae #oooh boy #🥵🥵 #purgatorywriter #bts fanfiction #bts smut

[nerdythebard]

#12: The Doctor [Doctor Who]

Brother, I disown you...

I don't know what my friend/chosen brother was thinking when he made this request... Actually, no, I know exactly what he was thinking! Well, no time to dawdle, let's do this Time Warp. Again.

Next Time: Before we return to the gods, I want to make a character very close to my heart. He is also a Doctor... only, word of warning, he's a little... Strange.

Well then... sigh, let's see the goals we need to meet to make the most brilliant alien in television playable in D&D:

Heroes Never Die: The signature ability of a Time Lord (and the most problematic), a way to cheat death and return to life. Yes, somehow we need to make a virtually immortal character in Dungeons & Dragons...

Bunny-Ears Lawyer: Even in his relatively serious regenerations, the Doctor is prone to flashes of randomness, acts of nonsense, mixing puns and physical comedy to often hide the incredibly fast and advanced brain processes.

Go-Go Gadget Galore: Do I even need to say anything? Besides his trusty TARDIS (which will not be included here, we're making the Doctor, not his equipment!), the Doctor also brandishes sonic devices of multiple varieties, psychic paper, the thing that goes DING, etc.

---

As you can imagine, finding the right race replacement for Time Lords wasn't easy. I'm definitely not using The-Movie-That-Does-Not-Exist solution, and making the Doctor... half-human, urgh. All we need to do is find a humanoid, almost-fossil race that can come back from death a limited amount of times.

The Doctor is a Human Revenant, a playtest race from Unearthed Arcana: Gothic Heroes. In-game, Revenant is an undead that came back to life to pursue a certain goal, whether it's vengeance, retribution, or to make amends. Putting some flavour into it, and turning it into a long-living, mysterious being who perhaps came from the Astral Plane to search for a way to save his home planet... why not? Regular Revenants get only a +1 to Constitution, but if we're using pre-existing race (such as Human), there's another set of rules. So, we get a +1 Constitution and +1 Intelligence, and we don't get to pick a skill or a feat. Not yet.

What's most important here is the Revenant's Relentless Nature feature. We are assigned a goal, a very specific one, that we must complete in order to achieve peace. Work with your DM on that one (the saving-your-home-world one from before sounds like a good start). Until we complete the goal:

If we are below Hit Points Maximum, at the start of our turn we regain 1 Hit Point;

We know the distance and direction to any creature involved in our goal (perhaps a fellow, once-friend Time Lord?);

When we die, we come back to life within 24 hours with 1 Hit Point. If our body is destroyed, we come back in a spot within 1 mile of our place of death (unfortunately, our equipment is destroyed);

BOOM! JUST FLAVOUR EACH DEATH AS A CHANGE OF FACE AND PERSONALITY, AND WE HAVE THE REGENERATION SYSTEM! HAH! YOU SEE THAT, BROTHER!?

Ekhm... back to work, then.

The Doctor is pretty far from home, so giving him the Far Traveller background seems like the right approach. We gain proficiencies in Insight and Perception skills, proficiencies with one musical instrument (perhaps a recorder?)/gaming set, we learn one language of our choice, and we get the All Eyes on You feature; our mannerisms and quirks definitely draw attention towards us and our group, but we can take advantage of that in order to fish for some information, secure an audience with the local nobleman, or... I dunno, snog Madame de Pompadour?

ABILITY SCORES

No surprise there, we start with Intelligence. We have a literal Big Galaxy Brain™ and we use it often, and only sometimes to show off. Follow that up with Dexterity, we're nimble and we're doing a lot of running, especially when being chased (plus, we've invented the Drunken Giraffe dance). Constitution is next, the Gallifreyan biology is significantly superior to that of regular Terrans.

Next up, Charisma. It usually works, sometimes it doesn't, but even then we're kinda adorkable. Wisdom is a little low, I think we all shall agree to that, the Doctor is a creature of whim. He gets lost in thought, has a hard time remembering to explain his logic to others. Finally, we're dumping Strength. Now, we're definitely physically stronger than humans, I just don't remember any particular feats of super-strength in the show.

Heck, you want even more Time Lord shenanigans? Ask your DM to implement the "every death/regeneration makes all ability scores randomly switch places" rule.

CLASS

Level 1 - Artificer: Once again, nobody is surprised we begin with the Smart & Techy One™ for the Doctor. Artificers were brought to 5e via Tasha's Cauldron of Everything. These magical tinkers have d8 Hit Dice, [8 + Constitution modifier] initial Hit Points, proficiencies with light armour, medium armour, heavy armour, shields, simple weapons, and optionally firearms (although that's definitely not the Doctor's style). We additionally get proficiency with thieves' tools, tinker's tools, and one set of artisan's tools we choose. We can't get the sonic screwdriver (although if you want one, hint to your DM about the existence of the All-Purpose Tool), we have all these tools to replace it with. Our saving throws are Constitution and Intelligence, and we get to pick two class skills: let's get History and Investigation.

Artificers start with Magical Tinkering, an ability to bestow harmless magical properties onto inanimate objects. We choose a Tiny object with no magic in it, and grant it one of the following properties indefinitely:

It sheds bright light for 5 feet and dim light for an additional 5;

Whenever tapped, the object plays a recorded message no longer than six seconds;

The object continuously emits a smell or a sound of our choice;

A static image (picture, lines of text, shapes, etc.) appear on the object's surface.

Artificers are also casters, so at the first level, we get Spellcasting. Our casting ability is, of course, Intelligence and the number of spells we can prepare is equal to [our Intelligence modifier + half of our Artificer level rounded down]. We also know how to cast rituals.

We start with two cantrips:

Magic Stone lets us imbue three pebbles with magic (or perhaps, in this case, kinetic energy?) for 1 minute. We can then use the pebbles ourselves, or give them to somebody else. On a successful hit, the target suffers [1d6 + our Intelligence modifier] bludgeoning damage and the spell ends on that particular pebble.

Prestidigitation is a cantrip of plenty varieties, which very well could be disguised as the Doctor's tinkering with his sonic screwdriver. It can be used to warm or chill food, clean or soil objects, or perhaps lighting and snuffing our small flames.

We start with two 1st-level spell slots, and we get three 1st-level spells:

Alarm sets up a secured perimeter, no larger than a 20-feet cube, for 8 hours. Whenever a create not-designated as safe while setting the spell, crosses its boundary, we get a signal informing us about the intrusion, which also wakes us up if we're sleeping. The signal can be set to inform only us, or everybody around.

Detect Magic informs us of any magical activity within 30 feet of us for 10 minutes (concentration). We sense magic lingering on objects, people, as well as locations, and we can determine the type of magic present (but not a particular spell, for example, we sense that a spell on the object is enchantment-type, but not that it's Power Word: Kill).

Identify is... pretty much the one function of the sonic screwdriver we've all seen. It lets us learn about an object we choose, including its magical properties (if any) and if it's affected by any spells. And it works on wood!

With a spell list like that, we can safely say

Level 2 - Artificer: We continue with the Tech Savvy Class, and we learn the Artificer's signature skill, Infuse Item. It lets us bestow magical properties onto mundane items. Similarly to Warlock's Invocations, Artificers have Infusions they can select and put into items. Starting from this level, we can infuse two items at once, and we get to pick four Infusions from the list. For the Doctor, let's pick:

Replicate Magic Item: Bag of Holding is probably the most useful infusion in the early game. The infusion does exactly what it says, and a Bag of Holding is always a good item to own (just watch out for the Bag Man!)

Enhanced Defence infusion puts some extra protection (+1 to AC) onto an armour or a shield.

Mind Sharpener is a helping hand for any spellcaster. The infusion put onto an armour, or woven into a robe, sends a jolt to re-focus the mind. When the wearer fails a Constitution saving throw to keep their concentration, one charge (out of four) of the infusion expends, to make them succeed instead. The charges are refilled at dawn.

Returning Weapon gives a +1 to attack and damage rolls of the weapon it's applied on and makes it return to the wielder's hand immediately after it's used to make a ranged attack. With the keyword "immediately", it gives your Rangers and other bow-users infinite ammunition with just one arrow.

We can also get one more 1st-level spell: Disguise Self changes our appearance for 1 hour, or until we choose to dismiss it as an action. The spell affects our body, clothing, and items we carry (including weapons). It is not a physical disguise, just an illusion woven around us; if we make ourselves thinner than we really are, and somebody was to touch the space where our regular body would be, they're going to feel the body, albeit invisible. For the Doctor, this seems like a combination of psychic paper and the Chameleon Circuit.

Level 3 - Artificer: At this level, we get the Right Tool for the Job feature. If we have thieves' tools or artisan's tools in hand, we can create any other set of artisan's tools.

We also get to pick our subclass, our Artificer Specialization. The Doctor is no alchemist, and we'll probably build Tony Stark at some time in the future, therefore we're picking Battle Smith. Those tinkers are masters of protections, being able to put up defensive mechanisms on the spot. Since the Doctor is a diplomat first, runner second, and combatant very close and reluctant third, focusing on support is a good option.

As a Battle Smith, we gain proficiencies with smith's tools, and we gain some more magic with Battle Smith Spells:

Heroism imbues the willing creature with bravery. Until the spell ends (1 minute, concentration), the target is immune to being frightened and gains Temporary Hit Points equal to our Intelligence modifier at the start of each of their turns (AKA every six seconds). When the spell ends, any Temporary Hit Points remaining are lost.

Shield creates an invisible barrier as a reaction to getting hit. It adds +5 to our AC until the start of our next turn.

Although a reluctant fighter, the Doctor as a Battle Smith also gets the Battle Ready feature. We gain proficiency with martial weapons, and when we attack with a magic weapon, we can use our Intelligence modifier instead of Strength or Dexterity for attack and damage rolls.

Finally, Battle Smiths get the Steel Defender. With our tinkering, we create our first companion, a steel defender; it is friendly to us and our companions and obeys our commands. With that, we got ourselves the one and only K9

Level 4 - Artificer: At this level, we get our first Ability Score Improvement! However, instead of upgrading our abilities this time, we'll grab a feat. The Telepathic feat from Tasha's Cauldron of Everything will represent the Doctor's limited psychic abilities: we increase one of our non-physical abilities by 1, let's go for Intelligence. We can speak telepathically to any creature within 60 feet, but the creature cannot reply (unless they're telepathic too, of course). Finally, we can touch a Detect Thoughts spell once per long rest, without a need to expend spell slots. Give your target a good headbutt, and learn their surface thoughts.

We also get our final spell: Catapult turns one inanimate object that isn't worn or carried (and weighs from 1 to 5 pounds) and turns it into a remote projectile. The object flies in a straight line for 90 feet before losing its momentum and falling. If it hits a creature, they have to make a Dexterity saving throw or take 3d8 bludgeoning damage. Distract your pursuers with a head of cabbage flying at their heads.

Level 5 - Rogue: We say goodbye to the Artificer, as we move onto Rogue for the rest of the build. Rogues use the same Hit Dice as Artificers, so nothing really changes when it comes to our Hit Points. We already have proficiency with light armour and thieves' tools, but we can pick one class skill – let's pick Acrobatics for better running and parkour chances when escaping aliens and responsibilities.

Rogues start with Expertise, which lets us double our proficiency bonus (NOT ability modifier) for two skills of our choice: let's boost Insight and History, to best utilize our centuries of living. We also learn how to speak Thieves' Cant, a special system of phrases and signals used by other Rogues to communicate without revealing their secrets. Finally, we have Sneak Attack: once per turn we can add 1d6 extra damage if a) we have an advantage on our roll, or b) the target is within 5 feet of another creature hostile towards it. The attack must be done by either a ranged weapon or one with the finesse property (like a dagger or a rapier).

Level 6 - Rogue: We get Cunning Action, which let us turn some Actions we can do in combat into Bonus Actions. That way, we still have an Action to spare if we decide to use Dash, Disengage, or Hide. Considering how much running the Doctor does, it's good to have something else to do just in case.

Level 7 - Rogue: Our Sneak Attack changes to 2d6.

We also get to pick our second subclass, our Roguish Archetype. Now, initially, I considered going Swashbuckler, as it combines nimble footwork and gives us some charm abilities. However, since we're going with the build that emphasizes support and actual combat as a last resort, we'll go with Inquisitive.

We start this subclass with Ear for Deceit, whenever we roll Insight checks to determine if a creature is lying to us, we treat each roll of 7 or lower as 8.

We also get Eye for Detail. This is mostly to be used in combat (or if your DM runs dungeons in Initiative Mode), as it allows us to use Perception or Investigation checks as a bonus action, where it would normally take an action.

Finally, Inquisitive Rogues get Insightful Fighting. As a bonus action, we can make an Insight check, contested by the enemy's Deception check. If we succeed, for 1 minute we can use our Sneak Attack on the target even if we don't have an advantage or the target isn't near another of its enemies.

Level 8 - Rogue: Time for another ASI! Let's raise our Intelligence by 1 point, and use the spare one for Strength.

Level 9 - Rogue: Our Sneak Attack changes to 3d6.

We also get Uncanny Dodge. Whenever we're being hit by an attack, we can use our reaction to halve the damage dealt.

Level 10 - Rogue: Halfway through the build, and we get another shot at Expertise. Once again, we get two skills to which we can double our proficiency bonus. Let's go with Perception and Investigation.

Level 11 - Rogue: Our Sneak Attack becomes 4d6.

We also get one of the better abilities in the game, Evasion. If we're being targeted by an AoE attack that would deal half damage on a successful Dexterity saving throw, we take no damage if we make the save. What that means is, we can now take a Fireball face-on, shrug it off and loudly proclaim

Level 12 - Rogue: We get another ASI. Let's improve our Dexterity by two points this time.

Level 13 - Rogue: Our Sneak Attack becomes 5d6.

We also get another subclass feature. Steady Eye gives us an advantage on Perception or Investigation checks if we move no more than half of our movement speed on our turn.

Level 14 - Rogue: Time for another ASI. Let's focus on getting some more Hit Points this time, and get +2 points to Constitution.

Level 15 - Rogue: Our Sneak Attack becomes 6d6.

At this level, we get Reliable Talent, which upgrades our abilities to almost anime protagonist-level. Whenever we make a check for a skill we're proficient in, we treat all rolls of 9 and lower as 10.

Level 16 - Rogue: We're getting one more ASI. Let's raise our Dexterity again, putting 2 points in it.

Level 17 - Rogue: Our Sneak Attack becomes 7d6.

We get our final subclass upgrade for this build, the Unerring Eye. We can now sense illusions and magical tricks within 30 feet, as well as shapechangers not in their original form. We can detect there is an effect trying to trick our senses around us, but we don't know its nature (i.e. if we meet a creature that activates our sense, we cannot distinguish whether it's a Disguise Self spell, or a natural shapeshifting ability, or a Druid's Wild Shape).

Level 18 - Rogue: We get another one of the best abilities in the game, Blindsense. We can now detect the presence of invisible and hidden creatures within 10 feet radius of us.

Level 19 - Rogue: Our Sneak Attack becomes 8d6.

Our mind becomes more slippery with Slippery Mind. We gain proficiency in Wisdom saving throws.

Level 20 - Rogue: Our build's capstone is Rogue 16, which is also our final ASI. Let's finally cap Intelligence, as it should've been from the start when it comes to Time Lords.

---

There it is. My take on how to play as the Doctor in Dungeons & Dragons. I believe I've covered most if not all of the important features the Doctor has, but let's see:

Let's face it, we're not a frontline fighter... we're not even a backline fighter. We support. With 14 AC (without armour), 151 Hit Points on average, and a +4 to Initiative, our job is to manoeuvre, around the battlefield and let our friends take care of the enemy, while we do other things. With Reliable Talent and Expertise we are great at sweeping the room for clues and hints, even if in the heat of battle. Thanks to Unerring Eye and Blindsense, our senses aren't that easy to fool.

Unfortunately, our Strength is not great, and that means some weapons are just a hindrance (unless we pick a finesse weapon, which replaces Strength with Dexterity). While we have late-game proficiency in Wisdom saving throws, throughout the earlier stages those might prove a little problem.

---

And that is it for this build. I hope that you guys enjoyed it, and I'll see you for the next one!

- Nerdy out!

#d&d 5e #dnd #dungeons and dragons #character building #the doctor #doctor who #new who #classic who #time lord #artificer #battle smith #rogue #inquisitive #revenant

[gamesception]

So I played that Kingdom Hearts Rhythm game on the Switch recently. I mean, yeah, the us$60 asking price was taking the piss, and hiding a brief moment of narrative advancement for the core series at the end of a rather long game on a spinoff title that is otherwise several hours of empty recap of the series, on a portable console that previously exactly zero games int he series appeared on, is basically a joke about how badly story is delivered in this franchise.

But, I mean, a Kingdom Hearts rhythm game isn't a completely nonsensical idea, at least not by Kingdom Hearts standards. The music is the most, maybe the only, consistently high quality element of the series, and is probably more responsible for the emotional attachment fans feel for the series than anything else. Track after track of the brilliant Yoko Shimomura's best work, stunning orchestral arrangements by Kaoru Wada, a sprinkling of nostalgia triggering themes from Disney and Final Fantasy, with a handful of achingly sincere jpop songs from Utada Hikaru as the cherry on top, there's more than enough quality and variety on hand to fill out a solid rhythm game. And there's precedent from those Final Fantasy Theatrhythm games.

$60 was stil clearly absurd, but it was on sale for half holiday times, and I figured sure, for $30 I'd give it a try. So how was it?

Well, I mean, not terrible. But frustratingly while it repeatedly gestures towards being 'great' it deliberately refuses to go there, seemingly because that would have required even the tiniest bit of effort.

There are three main stage styles The first and most common has a team of three KH asset heroes marching forward on a musical scale looking path that floats through an environment built on classic kingdom hearts assets. KH asset enemies pop up in front of you and have to be bopped down to the rhythm of the song, miking in a few jumps to dodge attacks or reach a flying enemy, or triangle presses to use a special attack.

These stages are serviceable, but there's some odd quirks to it. For instance, you have three heroes in a line, and three 'bop' buttons (L1, R1, and A) to enable simultaneous double & triple bops, so you'd think each button would correspond to bopping with a specific character, right? Some of the enemies even do a cutesy thing where they appear on one side of the path but move to the opposite side before you bop them like they're trying to trick you into pushing the wrong bop button. And yet, which bop button you press doesn't matter, only the timing and that you push at least as many bop buttons as enemies you're supposed to bop on that beat.

And that's weird too, because the stages also seem like they're sometimes trying to trick you out on how many bops you're doing, like a sequence of 12, 123, 23, 123, etc. But the game doesn't care if you push *extra* bop buttons, so if in that sequence you just enter 123, 123, 123, 123 to the beat that's fine. It's not terrible, but it's kind of weird. Honestly these stages plays better if you just pretend that position and number of bops actually matters.

Odd quirks aside, these sorts of levels work fine at giving the impression of fighting through a stage, while hitting buttons to the pretty great music. As you play through the main campaign you unlock different teams as you reach their respective games in the story recap. Four teams in total: classic team Sora/Donald/Goofy, days team Roxas/Axel/Xion, bbs team Aqua/Ventus/Terra, 3d team Riku/random dreameater/random dreameater. And of course occasional disney characters will take the place of one of your party members, and sometimes micky shows up if you use the 'mickey help me' item. I was pleasantly surprised to find that the game lets you use whatever team you want once they're unlocked, so of course I went through most of the game with team days.

every few levels progress stops for kairi's voice actor to read through an extremely abridged plot summary of one of the games in a way that long time fans of the series absolutely don't need but I doubt new players would find particularly informative.

...

The regular stages are serviceable, but by the time you finish the summary of the first game they're getting a little old. The game clearly needed the occasional more dramatic gameplay experience to break up the experience, like a boss fight at the end of a long stage, and just as you're thinking that you meet the second stage style: boss fights.

The path that your party normally runs down bopping enemies is gone, replaced by a swoosh in the foreground that circles to bop swing through while in the background your selected party faces off against the boss. At the raw level the game play's about the same, 3 buttons for 3 bops with no association of each button to each bop included, but jumping is replaced by hold notes and pressing thumbsticks in different directions. Sometimes the circles start to glow purple indicating the boss is preparing a special attack, and after the purple button sequence there will be a short bit with no circles to bop so you can watch your party either adeptly dodge the attack or get wrecked by it based on how well you did on the purple bits.

Honestly, the boss fights really work. Not just because Kingdom Hearts boss music is some of the best Kingdom hearts music. When I beat the first one against Ansem at the end of the first game's recap, I was actually pretty excited. Like clearly it would have been better if there were a couple more boss fights along the way, but if Melody of Memories was going to be battle recaps of the stages of each Kingdom Hearts game with a cool boss sequence against each of their last bosses, maybe even a boss rush against the organization at the end of KH3? Maybe with some bonus boss stages against some of the hidden/post game bosses? That would have been amazing, and I was really looking forward to it.

But these were also clearly a lot more work for the developers to put together, and you can tell because there are hardly any boss stages at all. Exactly four in fact, not even one per game in the series! No boss fight against Chernabog, or Marluxia, or Young Xehanort, or Terrinort, or Vanitas. One Winged Angel and Rage Awakened are in the game, but just regular battle-down-the-path stages, not cool boss stages against Sephiroth & the Lingering Will. And there's exactly one boss fight against a disney villain - Maleficent.

Again, the four boss fights are good. Really good. But while you'd think 'my only complaint is that I wish there were more' would count as praise rather than criticism, in this case no it really is some pretty significant criticism.

'But if there's only four boss stages, what the heck do they do with Kingdom Hearts 3,' you ask, ' the last like third of that game is nothing /but/ boss fights?' Well that's where the third stage type comes in:

Cut scene stages. Your chosen party just flies in place doing nothing while the boss stage style circles float towards you while an unrelated pre-rendered cut scene plays in the background. Mechanically it works, it has the boss fight style hold notes and joystick directions to make it a bit more intricate than the walking/bopping stages. But its if anything the least engaging because nothing happening on the screen has anything to do with anything else. Your characters aren't fighting anything, they're just flying there, and the background doesn't establish an environment that they fly through, it's just a cut scene.

This works fine for the Utada Hikaru jpop game intro animations. I'm not sure what else they could have done with them. But either the Switch couldn't handle the hd assets of kingdom hearts 3, or else they looked too jarringly different next to the ps2/3ds/psp assets used for everything else in the game, so nearly all of the kh3 stages are done in cut scene form, and it's jarring and sad. It feels like the devs just ran out of time or effort and gave up at the end, an impression strongly reinforced by the fact that there's like one song per kh3 world, where there were like 3 for all the worlds from earlier games.

I was enjoying the game before the kh3 parts, despite the odd quirks and sad lack of boss stages, but yeah, the game definitely ends on a weak note. Though it doesn't exactly end there. After you beat the entire recap, there are a couple songs and cut scenes that actually advance the series plot a tiny little bit! And if you could care less about rhythm games and just wanted that precious teaser of series plot, well in that case you've already just watched the scenes on youtube, but if you want a text recap....

In that case you should probably just watch the cut scenes on youtube, but if you want the spoilers in text form.... The thrust of the postgame segment here is that Kairi's in a virtual world built from her memories by the techy support characters looking for clues to where Sora might have gone.

There's some cut scene style musical stages where kairi floats through the endless cloud sea of the Final World, then a final boss fight against Kairi's memory of Old Man Xehanort, only by this point we all know Nomura will never let Kairi do anything for herself, so her memory of Xehanort kicks her but until Sora's silent spirit appears 'from some place his voice cannot reach' (presumably to save on the voice acting budget) to fight Xehanort for her. After beating memory Xehanort, he shows Kairi a repressed memory from when Research-Assistant Xehanort sent toddler Kairi away from Radiant Garden.

And based on that restored memory, various characters decide Sora must be in a 'fictional world'. Riku off screen has been dreaming about Sora in a city full of tal buildings, so he and Kairi go to the Final World and talk to a star ghost girl from a world 'on the other side' who remembers a city with tall buildings in her world called 'Quaddratus'. Riku uses the waking power to travel through star girl's heart to her home world, leaving Kairi behind because of course Kairi gets left behind.

Enter pointless speculation about future KH games that might never happen!

Now of course, we already know from the postgame superboss fight of KH3 that Sora's in the world of 'Verum Rex', KH3's slantways version of 'Final Fantasy Vs. 13', Nomura's baby that died in the development hell cradle, the corpse of which was taken from him at gunpoint before its parts were Frankensteined back together into Final Fantasy 15, an experience so deeply traumatizing that Nomura responded by excising nearly any reference to Final Fantasy from KH3, the third game in the series whose fundamental concept is 'Disney meets Final Fantasy'. That decision, while understandable, was especially tragic because in the couple decades since the first Kingdom Hearts game the people in charge of Disney have clearly grown significantly more hostile towards the entire Kingdom Hearts concept, as evidenced by how KH3 was hardly allowed to touch the various Disney properties it was allowed to include at all.

But of course, now Sora's not just in another world, he's in another universe altogether, and 'Quadratus' is just an incredibly dumb way of saying 'Squarish', so it seems like going forward the series might be focusing more on square properties and hanging less on the Disney side? Which might be cool. Aladdin world and Hercules world were fun and all, but if disney doesn't want to let Nomura play with their toys anymore I personally wouldn't mind watching him play around in various final fantasy worlds instead. Especially if we're getting Nomura's slightly unhinged alternate/adjacent version of those worlds. 'Verum Rex' instead of FF15, FF7remake instead of FF7, etc.

Or I would if any future Kingdom Hearts game weren't going to be using your console's graphics card to mine crypto for nfts instead of rendering graphics for an actual game that someone could have fun playing. I love Nomura's peculiar sensibilities, but dang do I wish he were working for another developer. I mean, no, not that one, obviously. Not that one either, yikes.

...

Back to Melody of Memories, it was less of a weird idea than it might have seemed, and us$60 was always going to be asking too much for it, but ignoring the price, was it good? Eh, it was ok. I didn't dislike it. I love Kingdom Hearts music, and that plus KH nostalgia, and getting to see my favorite sad child leaping joyously in the air with a huge smile on her face when she bops a special star enemy carried me through most of this game well enough. But it has some core mechanical weaknesses, and its main campaign ends with its weakest segments. That's all based on the main story mode though, there are tons of unlocks including extra songs, and vs. & co op. modes I haven't tried yet that might breathe more life into it.

The game's not bad, but just a bit more actual effort would have made for an really good game, and being able to see the good game we could have had from the front porch of the mediocre game we ended up with is frustrating, yeah. As is, if you like kingdom hearts music and are dying for a rhythm game on the switch then sure, go ahead, but I'd recommend waiting until you can find it used or on sale for us$15 or less. I spent $30 on it and honestly feel like I still spent too much.

#kingdom hearts #melody of memory #long post #i didn't dislike it

[lacquerware]

Sekiro Focuses on Challenge, Slices Through Bullshit

There’s a moment late in the first act of Sekiro where you reach a checkpoint labeled “Dojo,” just outside a room with a closed door. When you open the door, you find a blue-robed samurai, “Ashina Elite – Jinsuke Saze,” calmly waiting for you just on the other side in the seiza position. As you approach, he rises and greets you with a fierce iaijutsu style, unsheathing and resheathing his sword in two-slash bursts. One slash is enough to nearly kill you, but the second slash is sure to finish the job without giving you a chance to recover.

When you inevitably die, you revive back at that Dojo checkpoint, the door still open from before, and Jinsuke is back in his seiza position, staring you down. This was the first time I could recall a FromSoftware game placing a checkpoint within view of the boss. It was also the moment I affirmed that, for once, misery wasn’t the point. I’d already fought many bosses and minibosses in Sekiro, and though they were often challenging enough to kill me multiple times, at no point had the consequences for death felt punitive. In almost all cases, reinitiating the fight was as simple as traversing a short distance, made easy by Sekiro’s ability to jump and grapple and his relatively fast run speed. Granted, this particular miniboss was an extreme case, perched mere feet away from the checkpoint, but was not an exceptional case. Rather, he epitomized the shift in dynamic that sets Sekiro apart from FromSoft’s “Soulsborne” games, which, despite their many merits, I have long regarded with seething resentment. Sekiro, like other FromSoft games, demands you “git gud,” but unlike those other games, Sekiro actually wants you to.

I spent at least an hour fighting Jinsuke Saze. The average duration of each attempt was less than a minute. I’m pretty sure he killed me at least eighty times, which stands to reason, given that he’s almost sure to kill you if he hits you at all. But the only penalty for each death was having to retry the fight. Wait, let me amend that: the only penalty for every two deaths—because in Sekiro, you can resurrect yourself mid-fight. (So when I say he killed me at least eighty times, what I actually mean is a hundred sixty times.)

Compare this to the part of Bloodborne that made me shelve it for two years: Micolash, Host of the Nightmare. By most accounts, he’s one of the “easiest” bosses in the game. Since he’s one of the few that isn’t just an enormous pile of erratically flailing limbs with inscrutable hitboxes, I can’t disagree. But he’s not easy, per se, since, like Sekiro’s blue-robed butcher, his attacks can hit hard enough to kill you if he catches you just once or twice. The problem is that each time you die, you have to repeat a maddeningly long and convoluted process to reinitiate the fight: call the elevator, wait for the elevator, ride the elevator back up, cross a metal footbridge, kill or evade two of the fastest, most dangerous skeleton enemies in gaming history, chase Micolash through a fog-laden labyrinth of corridors lined with more erratically flailing skeletons, and finally corner him in a chamber, where the fight actually begins. Furthermore, Micolash can bolt in a few different directions when you pursue him, meaning it’s never quite the same from one attempt to the next, and sometimes the chase can go on for a full minute or more.* If you manage to get through all that and knock out half his health, he flees and leads you on another even longer, more dangerous chase. More skeletons, some with hard-hitting ranged attacks, more ways to get lost, deadly drops, and a more elusive Micolash. When you finally find him, the only way to reinitiate the fight is to drop down on him from above, which guarantees some fall damage. Depending on how you performed in the first half, that might be all it takes to do you in. Nightmare, indeed.

(*There is an exploit to ensure he runs directly to the chamber every time, but it’s such a nonsensical process of AI finagling, you could only be expected to figure it out through lots of trial-and-error or consulting the web.)

Micolash, too, is an extreme but not exceptional case. The problem with this encounter and many other moments in Bloodborne and the Dark Souls games is that the challenge is overshadowed by the hassle surrounding it. All told, actually fighting Micolash is a simple, rote process of dodging and counterattacking the same one move over and over. The defining aspect of the fight isn’t the challenge, it’s all the shit that gets in the way of fighting him to begin with. In moments like this, the game isn’t saying “git gud,” it’s saying “endure hardship.” Not the same thing. There are a variety of ways to stumble through Soulsborne games without getting that good, thanks to things like co-op and the ability to upgrade your stats and weapons. In fact, the punishment is often so severe that there’s high incentive to lean on these crutches rather than dedicating the inordinate amount of time required to get good. I myself only beat Bloodborne thanks to a very powerful co-op partner who got me through the final boss fight on my second try. I got through much of the game this way, and came away feeling like I’d poured so much of my time—in other words, my actual, real-life life—into the game without having much to show for it. The challenge, the player growth, was never the point—the nightmare was.

Ultimately the hardest thing about Bloodborne was tolerating its bullshit. 

The problem I have with this approach to difficulty is that there’s no logical end to it. If difficulty is defined by impeding the player’s ability to improve, you may as well break one of my real-life fingers or pass me an infant each time I die and call it “difficulty.” It doesn’t feel like game design to me.

By contrast, Sekiro frequently forces you to learn and improve by pushing you through a funnel. Adapt or die immediately. It’s as clear-cut as the edge of a sword. But the game lets you work at it, because—of course—that’s the only way to “git gud” at anything. You will fail, but the focus is almost always on the challenge itself, so the game is happy to let you bang your head against it without interruption.

This hard-earned panty shot was more gratifying than beating the entirety of Bloodborne.

For me, that made all the difference. Not only is Sekiro the first FromSoft game of its sort to win me over, it’s now one of my all-time favorite games, and the first one I’ve ever Platinumed. Admittedly, this has emboldened me in my criticism of Soulsborne. As someone inclined to second-guess himself first and everyone else a distant second, I’m confident now that the problem wasn’t me—it was all that misery.

#sekiro #bloodborne #dark souls #soulsborne #fromsoftware #from software #fromsoft #games #gaming #video games #videogames #ashine elite #jinsukesaze #difficulty #challenge #games criticism #review #games journalism #editorial #platinum #trophy #micolash #host of the nightmare #game design

[triforce-princess]

well, i finally 100% completed hyrule warriors age of calamity in its entirety, including post game content, so i’m finally going to write a full review. beware this review will contain every spoiler imaginable so please do not click the read more if you haven’t finished the game yet and don’t want to be spoiled!

tl,dr; this game is a lot of fun despite some of its shortcomings and it’s really nice to see characters get the development they needed in breath of the wild. also a huge improvement gameplay-wise from the first game. if you’re a fan of breath of the wild it’s worth a try, just don’t expect breath of the wild style of gameplay! and if you’re a fan of the original hyrule warriors, you are going to love this a lot. ok now to get into the details. this is extremely long;

about the gameplay; it took me a while to fully adjust to the new controls and mechanics, but once i finally understood it it was so much fun. i originally wasn’t crazy about the sheikah slate runes since it was difficult at first to remember that a. i had that ability, and b. when the proper time to use it was. but when it finally clicked for me it brought a whole new interesting layer to the gameplay that challenged my memory in a fun way. it took me even longer to learn what the use of the rods were but those were great in a pinch once i figured it out. i also loved the flurry rush mechanic since dodging is a pretty important aspect of the gameplay. all these new layers added to this gameplay makes me wonder how i ever put up with the original hyrule warriors gameplay lol. something i wasn’t entirely crazy about was the wall jumping and paraglider stuff? i never really found it useful and it always just became a problem when i was trying to dodge and i’d be confused about why my character was slowly flying around at critical moments.

the camera in this game was pretty frustrating. with the more organic map & lots of tight spaces (which i’ll get more into later), the camera would get stuck a lot and you’d be unable to really see what’s going on and it got pretty frustrating at times. i wish there were some way they could fix that but i’m not sure what they could do without having the camera go out of bounds & show the edges of the map. maybe they could’ve made some of the objects that are in the middle not be things the camera get stuck on though.

i also felt like there were too many special effects going on with some enemies and attacks, sometimes it would cover up large parts of the screen & you wouldn’t be able to see what you were fighting and that was pretty stressful (i found myself frequently yelling “i can’t see!!” when i’d defeat a guardian or something in a room with lots of other enemies. this only became an issue in the later parts of the game though.

now about the maps, i do love how much more organic and natural they are. it’s a big upgrade from the original which had a lot of wide corridors leading into square rooms which were allied/enemy basses. but unfortunately, this causes issues with navigation and the camera getting stuck (like i mentioned before). i had a lot of problems where the map was too natural and i was confused about why i was getting stuck on level geometry when it looked like i could walk through there. i think the breath of the wild style makes this confusing too because you can’t really undo a thousand hours of being able to walk through nearly everything. but also it was just really unclear what was a wall and what wasn’t sometimes. i was surprised i actually had to zoom in on the mini map and look at that to move around at times. definitely an ambitious aspect of the game & i appreciate the effort and detail, but i don’t know if it works that great for this style of gameplay. i also don’t know why they bothered putting so many small details on the ground if they’re just going to pop in so close to the camera. it was kind of awkward when you cleared out all the enemies & were traveling to another location and it was the only noticable thing on screen.

speaking of ambitious, we can’t ignore this game’s framerate issues. it’s the first thing on everyone’s minds when talking about this game. most of the time, it was pretty acceptable. but they definitely pushed this game farther than the switch can go and it shows. i really appreciate the love they put into making this game as detailed as they did, but i don’t know if it was worth it in the long run. there’s only a couple times i can think of where the framerates got absolutely unacceptable, and it always seemed to be when there was a lot of electricity and enemies on screen at the same time. it happened once during the final vah naboris mission and another time where there were a ton of electric lizalfos all shooting electricity at once at the same time you have to fight an electric lynel. but, i’m not the kind of gamer that loses my shit over dropped framerates, i grew up with the n64 & have had to put up with poor early emulation many times in my life so framerates don’t really phase me until it just gets unplayable.

wasn’t crazy about how many late game missions were just boss rushes, but that’s pretty standard hyrule warriors fare. at least it was more fair in this game where most of the time you only had to fight one boss at a time and the next boss wouldn’t spawn in until you beat the first one, so there was no risk of accidentally aggro-ing a boss in another part of the map & have an unfair fight on your hands like in the first game. it was pretty anti-climactic how the seemingly final mission which had the highest recommended level was just another boss rush, and not even the hardest one (it was just a bunch of regular malice bosses in a row).

bit of a side note but i didn’t like having to grind for materials and find koroks for 100%. the koroks weren’t nearly as bad as breath of the wild though, thank god.

i’m pretty disappointed that some content that’s clearly in the game isn’t unlocked in the base game, it’s looking pretty likely that they’ll add it as dlc later & pretend it’s new content to make the game relevant again...i’ve always firmly believed dlc should be extra content that’s added in later. hopefully they’ll add some really cool stuff as dlc alongside the stuff that’s in the game & it won’t be so disappointing. there’s two characters i was sure would be unlocked as playable characters (sooga and astor) but i found it weird that you don’t get them in the post game and instead you get to play as the egg guardian (terrako) and calamity ganon???? talk about subverting expectations. also really frustrated to learn that zelda’s royal dress isn’t available in the base game but its in the files & is just missing one body part?? really hope that’s just a free update and not like, paid dlc. kind of dumb that they didn’t give the devs one extra day to model feet on the character.

about the story; the story starts out really strong i feel, i loved seeing characters get the development they didn’t get in breath of the wild and this game’s story makes breath of the wild’s story feel even more incomplete than it did before this game came out. and actually seeing the story play out in chronological order in real time without link having amnesia gave the story so much more feeling and connection. this is probably my favorite aspect of this game because i was always so disappointed with how disconnected you feel in breath of the wild because of the way the story is told. and it does so much of a better job illustrating link and zelda’s feelings. i’m probably the single most difficult person to convince when it comes to link and zelda being in a relationship or having feelings for eachother and i thought this was quite possibly the best master sword scene in any zelda game;

in previous games link has always had to prove his courage in a variety of trials spread across the land and to me its really boring, especially after how many times its been done. the thing that gets me about this scene is the master sword deems him worthy because of his desire to protect zelda even when he’s been beaten down & disarmed. that was a really beautiful moment to me & i’m glad they wrote the scene this way.

speaking of being worthy of power because you want to protect someone, i wasn’t really that crazy of zelda unlocking her power just because she loves link but honestly this game illustrated it in a much better way & i’m more down with it now. i loved this shot how it really captured what she was feeling;

it’s also in general awesome to see the champions in action, both in gameplay and in cutscenes. i remember being in awe the first time i got to play as urbosa. it feels like we finally really got to know them and how powerful they really were, instead of breath of the wild just telling us they were cool & we just had to believe it.

now for the part i know people say this game is shit because of; the time travel aspect. yeah, it’s a little silly and nonsensical, but honestly, it was kind of fun. and i don’t get how a time travel plot is somehow weird for the zelda series. the most critically acclaimed game of this series, ocarina of time, is entirely revolved around a time travel plot & the heroes would not have won if it weren’t for time travel in that game. yeah, it’s goofy, but this series is known for its nonsensical aspects & plotholes. there’s always some kind of unexplainable magic in this series that solves problems. i don’t think that makes this game shit. plus i was kind of starstruck when i first got to play as sidon lol. i was thinking to myself, man, who would’ve known 3 years later we’d get to play as sidon! crazy! none of the champion descendants were really my favorite to play as but it was still cool to see them & play as them.

something i didn’t understand was why kohga and the yiga clan joined zelda’s cause? i feel like a vital scene got cut. i don’t get why he’d join even when astor betrayed him, considering his group’s ambitions and how many times they tried to kill zelda. and where’d sooga go? the scene of astor betraying them kind of implied he was going to die but we never got confirmation of that, and he even shows up in a post game mission as an ally (no cutscene, just one line of dialogue during gameplay)

as for the ending, i guess it was alright? astor was a really lazily written villain and i just did not care for him at all. kinda don’t even care that we don’t get to play as him (yet, probably). calamity ganon’s design in this game was terrible. and i guess it would’ve been hard to make it work, but no beast ganon? just felt a little to easy to wrap up. despite this i guess it was nice to see hyrule get a happier ending even if it was a bit nonsensical at times. also this is just a bit of a personal thing for me but i liked seeing  hyrule before it was destroyed. it always bums me out when you find a locaiton in game that’s been destroyed & you can only think about what it mightve looked like before. this is something that’s bummed me out since wind waker (was always disappointed you don’t get to see what greatfish isle is like!!) and breath of the wild gave me so much disappointment in that aspect lol.

one final thought but it was odd to me how many lines revali got & how often he interacted with link lol. was weird to see him slowly warm up to link a little towards the end (but of course he’s still a little mean...). no other character acknowledges link as much as revali. this scene confused me the most??

there were so many other people revali could’ve spoken to. he barely even acknowledges teba who was the one who specifically came to his aid!! and the way link looks at him with big puppy eyes?? link barely makes a facial expression at anyone else! and how revali expresses gratitude for the first time in his life after looking at link’s stupid cute anime face and smiles (but he turns around because he would be too ashamed to smile at link i guess)

anyway that’s it, i finally got out all my thoughts about this game. this went on way longer than i intended and i’m sorry if you read the whole thing & it took forever lol. this game is fun, get it.

#legend of zelda #hyrule warriors: age of calamity #breath of the wild #text #hwaoc spoilers

[ultimate-kaisa-simp]

Ok so this took a while to write, but hopefully it doesn’t suck!

This is a re-write of season 2 episode 3 with @kaminos-hangout-corner’s The Mum Swap AU.

It skips going through the actual labyrinth, but i does do the before and after.

Very angsty because is there another way to write?

Might do a follow up if people ask but it probably won’t be as long as this one (2044 words!!)

Without further ado, hope you enjoy!

Hilda and Frida hid behind a cart full of books as they watched the librarian approach three women sitting at a very tall table. When none of the three made any move to speak, the librarian took a step forward, earnest expression on her face.

“Honored Council, does you calling me here today mean you’ve reconsidered my request?”

Her tone was so pleading, so vulnerable, that the three women - the council, Hilda guessed - shared matching looks of pity before they schooled their faces into stern expressions.

“Unfortunately not Johanna. We have called you here for a separate matter entirely. 29 years, 364 days and 22 hours ago, The Skeleton Whisperer was checked out. As the Keeper- sorry, the librarian, after 30 years the responsibility for the missing book passes to you.”

A book floated off the cart and towards the council as the woman on the left waved her wand shaped like a rose. Or maybe it was a rose, Hilda couldn’t tell from where she was hiding. She was so entranced by the show of magic Frida had to pull her down so they wouldn’t be seen.

“But I wasn’t even the librarian then! That was-”

Johanna’s protests died off and the council members were all looking sympathetic again? Hilda didn’t know what was going on, but she intended to find out. If it weren’t for Frida’s hand on her arm keeping her down, she would have already jumped out.

“We understand, and as a non-witch, we can’t throw you into the Void of No Return, but we would have to fire you. Do you have the card with you?”

Johanna nodded and reached into her pocket, only to find it was empty.

“I swore I had it in here, maybe the other one?”

Her checking got more frantic until Frida jumped out from behind the cart waving the card, dragging Hilda out with her.

“It says Pilqfvist! M. Pilqvist!”

Johanna turned towards them as the council reeled back in shock.

“Hilda? Frida? What are you two doing here?”

As Hilda took a deep breath to tell her the whole long story, the middle council witch cut her off.

“It doesn’t matter what they’re doing here! Non-witches! In the Witches Tower! It’s unheard of!”

Johanna crossed her arms and turned back to the council with a huff.

“I’m a non-witch, and you called me here. And I come here with some regularity. So I wouldn’t say it’s ‘unheard of’.”

The middle witch was about to say something else when the witch on the left cut her off.

“Well you were always a special case Johanna,” the witch smiled. “But the point remains that the clock is ticking and these two followed you here. Luckily for you, we know where you can find Matilda Pilqvist.”

Johanna smiled back up at the witch as Hilda and Frida went to stand beside her, handing her the card as they did so.

“Thank you Abigail,” she said with a sigh of relief. “Is it nearby? I won’t be able to open any portals to get there if it’s not.”

All three witches winced before Abigail waved her wand. Nothing happened for a few seconds before a different wand came zooming into the room. Abigail floated down onto the floor as she took hold of it, drawing a rectangle in the air while chanting. Once the shape was complete, she stepped back as a door materialised and placed the wand in, turning it like a doorknob. Turning, she faced Johanna with a somber expression.

“Through this door is the labyrinth of Arch-Sorceress Matilda Pilqvist. She’s… not one for visitors. I wish you the best of luck. You… you’ll need it.”

Hilda, Frida and Johanna all looked at each other and nodded. In sync, they all stepped through the door.

~~<3~~

“Ok, I think this should be the last room,” Johanna remarked, glancing up from the map that Frida had managed to find. They stepped through to find the room full of snow and ice.

“I bet we’re going to have to fight a snow or ice monster in here!” Hilda exclaimed excitedly. As soon as the words left her mouth, a burst of steam shot up from the ground. A monster made of lava and molten rock stepped out of the steam and roared, spraying lava everywhere.

“RUN FOR THE DOOR!”

It didn’t matter who shouted, they all jumped into action. Hilda and Frida ran around each side and Johanna slid underneath the monster. Once they were all on the other side, they slammed the door shut and took a moment to catch their breaths.

Straightening, they took in their surroundings. They were in a pitch black room, no end to the expanse, only one other door. Cautiously Hilda placed a hand on the handle and turned it. Behind the door was not a castle, like Frida was picturing, or a spooky dungeon like Hilda was, but instead a place very familiar to Johanna. As the younger two entered, there was a voice coming from an armchair in the corner.

“Oh look Cornelius! We have visitors!”

As an old lady rose out of the chair and floated over to the girls, Johanna, still outside the doorway, spoke, voice so quiet it was barely a whisper.

“Tildy?”

Tildy’s head snapped towards Johanna, who had tears pooling her eyes. She flew over at speeds far faster than one would assume she would be capable of, and wrapped Johanna in a hug. Johanna sobbed into her shoulder as she hugged back. Frida and Hilda turned away, feeling that this was a private moment not meant for them to witness.

“She’s gone Tildy, I’ve waited 10 years and she never came back! I miss her so much it hurts and, and-”

Johanna cut herself off with a fresh round of tears. Tildy just patted her back sadly, leading her over to the couch.

“I know dearie, I know. I miss her too. I tried to find her but she’s blocked her magic. Short of going door to door, there’s not much we can do aside from hope she comes back.”

As Johanna sat on the couch, head in her hands, Tildy turned towards Hilda and Frida.

“Now what can I do for you two young ladies?”

Frida didn’t answer so Hilda stepped in and took the lead.

“We’re looking for a book that you checked out… uhh… 29 years, 364 days, 23 hours and 45 minutes ago. The Skeleton Whisperer?”

Tildy huffed and rolled her eyes.

“Did those three fussbudgets send you here to make me return a book? I have more important things to deal with right now, you tell them I’ll return it when I’m good and ready.”

Hilda wasn’t sure if it was magic, or just Tildy’s grandmotherly nature, but she found herself relaxing a bit. It’s not like anything life threatening was at stake, right?

“But if we don’t get this book returned in time, Johanna will lose her job!”

The sense of urgency returned to Hilda at Frida’s words, and she started looking around for where the book might be.

“Oh dear, that is a problem! Well it can’t have gone far, we can look for it together. I’ll go get my crossbow!”

Hilda watched as Cornelius munched on a ball of yarn that was lying on the ground and got an idea.

“Tildy?” She started. “Is there any way your familiar might have the book?”

Tildy and Frida both turned to look at Cornelius as Tildy floated over.

“Cornelius? What’s that in your mouth?”

Tildy grabbed Cornelius as he tried to slowly shuffle away, making him spit out the wide variety of stuff he had swallowed, including the book which Frida quickly found. Tildy turned to Johanna and took her hand.

“Are you ready to go dear? There’s no rush.”

Frida covered Hilda’s mouth before she could point out that yes, there was a rush, but it didn’t matter as Johanna stood up, wiped her eyes, and then nodded. They all linked hands and teleported to the Council Room.

The card tower that the council was building fell abruptly as the group teleported in, though they all rushed to get back into dignified positions.

“We got the book!” Hilda yelled, waving it around for the council to see. Hilda and Frida were standing in front, Tildy beside them and Johanna behind them.

“I’m sorry, but a deadline is a deadline. You missed your chance by about 15 minutes.”

Hilda was confused and angry. They totally had more time than that!

“I’m sorry dears. Time gets a bit… messy when you translocate like that,” Tildy apologised.

“NO!” Johanna cried. “I have to stay here! What if she comes back! I need to make sure she’s ok!”

The council shifted in place as Tildy placed a comforting hand on Johanna’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry but rules are rules. Johanna, Librarian of Trollberg City Library and The Witches Tower, Famil-”

“Oh what utter nonsense!” Tildy interrupted. “Aren’t you the slighted bit impressed that three people without magic made it through my maze, when so many seasoned witches have failed? And can’t you see one of them is a natural witch?” She added, when the council shifted some more.

“Well that is true,” the middle witch conceded.

Hilda puffed out her chest a bit in pride and Frida gave an encouraging smile.

“So what do you say… Frida?”

Frida looked just as surprised as Hilda felt.

“Me?” She questioned. Tildy just nodded.

“Of course dear! And Hilda, you’ve got the spirit to be an invaluable familiar to Frida.”

As Frida and Hilda were celebrating their new witch-and-familiar status, Johanna stiffened behind them. With a wave of her finger, Tildy summoned her teapot, some cups and a few board games, leaving Hilda and Frida to catch them.

“Now, time for tea and board games back at my place! It’s been so long since I’ve had anyone new to play with, Cornelius is a horrible cheat!”

Tildy grabbed Johanna’s hands and started to pull her along when Johanna stopped her.

“Girls, would you mind waiting outside for a bit? There are a few more things that The Council, Tildy and I need to discuss.”

After sharing a look, Frida and Hilda nodded and left, finding the perfect position to eavesdrop.

~~<3~~

“Dear I understand you might be upset but-”

“OF COURSE I’M UPSET!” Johanna interrupted. “TILDY WHAT WERE YOU THINKING? THERE IS NO WAY THIS WILL END WELL!”

Johanna had tears streaming down her face as years of bottled up emotion came out. Abigail opened her mouth to speak but Johanna cut her off as well.

“I THOUGHT THE COUNCIL SAID I WAS THE TRIAL! WELL GUESS WHAT? THE TRIAL FAILED! THEY’RE JUST CHILDREN, WE SHOULDN’T DO THIS TO THEM!”

Johanna finally ran out of steam and sunk to the floor, overwhelmed by memories and emotion.

“We were just children,” she whispered through tears.

Tildy patted her on the back comfortingly.

“That’s the thing about children dear, they can learn from the mistakes of the past and become better for it. And you’ll be there to help them along the way, you can help them avoid those mistakes. Now, how about we go back to my place? I think we’ve kept them waiting long enough, don’t you?”

Johanna nodded and stood up on shaky legs. Wiping her eyes, she gave Tildy a hug and they left the room together. Once they met up with Hilda and Frida, Tildy teleported them all back to set up some games.

BONUS:

“Johanna?” Hilda started. “What’s the name of the person that you’re trying to find? We’ve met a lot of people on our adventures, maybe we’ve run into her!”

Johanna stiffened a bit before relaxing and let out a low chuckle.

“Well I don’t doubt that,” she laughed. “Here, I’ll draw you a picture as well.”

Hilda nodded and took her turn in Dragon Panic. By the time it got to Johanna’s turn, she was finished.

“This is Kaisa,” she said, sliding the paper over to Hilda. Hilda just stared at it in shock, picking it up and looking at it closer.

“This-” she said, the words getting stuck in her mouth. “This is my mum.”

#hilda librarian #hilda kaisa #hilda johanna #hilda (hilda) #hilda frida #hilda netflix #hilda the series #hilda tildy #hilda the council of three #the council of three #sketchbook ship #angst #fic #fan fiction #my writing #hilda fic #hilda fanfiction

[angelanimedesaray]

Through the Looking Glass Chapter 7: Revelation

AN:  Ah, yes, finally.  This chapter.  That is all hahaha.  Also they’re probably young teenagers at this point.  13, 14 years old, roughly.

Characters:  Levi, Reader, Reader’s Mother (Mentioned)

Pairing:  (Eventual)  Levi x Reader

Warnings:  Language

Word Count:  5050

<----Previous Chapter    Masterlist    Next Chapter---->

*Reader's POV*

For the first time since Levi first appeared in your life, he didn't disappear shortly after arriving.  He stayed with you until his fever finally broke.

Keeping him hidden from your mother was nothing short of a miracle.  You didn’t want him getting discovered and sent somewhere else to recover, because what he needed was to be here after what happened to him--he wanted to be here, too, from what you could see.

In order to hide him, he had to stay in your tent the entire time, which you declared your fort to your mother and were allowed to keep as long as it didn’t get in the way, and you washed everything when you were done.  That meant you had to shift it off your bed and make it a little smaller, but Levi still had plenty of room, and you could still fit underneath.

You didn’t do much while he was in the tent, though.  He was sick, and he spent his time with you recovering, wrapped up in blankets and getting medicine every twelve hours while you kept up a steady stream of water and occasional Gatorade to help him get better.  You would crawl into the tent and lay down next to him when you had the time, telling him stories and simply keeping him company.  You strategically smuggled him bowls of canned soup when your mom wasn’t home because of work or she had to make a grocery run, so he wasn’t going hungry.

There was one point when his fever got really bad, the point your mom used to tell you was right before it broke when you were sick.  You spent the whole time next to him, gently sponging his head and murmuring quiet reassurances and stories to him while he shivered and moved restlessly, occasionally murmuring out feverish nonsense, calming slightly when you would brush the hair from his face.  Since it calmed him down, you kept doing it, running your fingers through his hair while you talked softly to him and he rested.  With how much he slept in the couple days he was with you, you wondered how much rest he actually got back home.

There were a few heart-stopping moments when you thought your mother might catch you hiding Levi in your room, but you managed to play it off each time, either by claiming you were playing a game in your tent, or hiding Levi under the blankets, or claiming it was a kids only tent, and giants weren’t allowed. Typical kids stuff to keep the tent area off limits.

When Levi’s fever finally broke, he was still out of it and drained, but you could tell by a simple touch on his forehead that he wasn’t burning up anymore.  It was a relief, with a pressure lifting off your chest you hadn’t known was there to see that he was going to be okay--at least in regards to his health.  You still stayed with him, though, curled up next to him in the tent and even falling asleep there beside him.

When you woke up the morning after his fever broke in the tent, he was gone, and at long last, you finally questioned what happened, and considered the impossibility of his knack of disappearing into thin air.  No longer did you think it could have simply been from inattention on your part, or that it was in any way normal. Especially because you knew that he was not in any state to have gotten up and left on his own before you woke up.

So what was happening?

*Levi's POV*

Levi sat cross-legged in the open space he’d recently managed to find, hands loosely held together in his lap as he gazed down at the grassy ground, sunlight shining down on him from the hole above him.  He was lost in his own thoughts, confused and faced with an impossible reality, which was why he’d sought some refuge in a quiet space by himself, complete with fresh air filtering down from the surface.

He’d managed to make it up to the surface.  Briefly, but after what happened to him, he was extra determined to force his way to the surface if he had to.

Based off how well Y/N had lived, Levi had assumed that she would be somewhere within Wall Sina, and all he would have to do would be to evade the Military Police long enough to find a street familiar to where she lived.  He covered quite a bit of distance looking for her home, or at least something familiar from his time with her.  The longer he spent topside, though, the more he realized nothing looked like the place Y/N lived, even at the centermost, opulent part of Sina where the wealthiest lived.

She wasn’t up there.  All this time, he’d thought she was somewhere just above his head waiting for him, when really…

Levi let himself get caught and thrown back after that realization.  Originally he’d thought if he found her, they might be able to figure something out so he could stay.  That went out the window when he realized she wasn’t there.  If it wasn’t for the fact that he still wanted to live somewhere other than the Underground, somewhere clean and free of the filth underground, he might have thrown out any idea of going to the surface after realizing it wasn’t anywhere close to what he’d thought it would be.

It was still better than the Underground, and he still wanted to find a way up there.  The glaring question remained, though…

Where the hell was Y/N?  He knew all that time spent with her wasn’t some strange continuing fever dream--it was real.  He couldn’t explain it--how he got there, what sent him there, or even where there was, but he knew it was real, that she was real.

Where was he supposed to go from here?

Levi closed his eyes, running his hand slowly through his hair as he tried to grapple what he knew and figure it out from there.  Carriages that didn’t need horses, smooth stone streets, intricate clean water systems, colorful, variety of foods easily on hand, light without fire inside homes…

And how had he gotten there in the first place?  When...it was happening, it had been like he was being thrown between reality and a nightmare, except he’d been painfully aware that both were reality.  But he hadn’t moved from either spot as he went back and forth.  He’d stayed in the same pinned position in one reality, and was held in her arms in another, with no time passing when he’d...jump between the two.

None of this made sense to him.  He thought he was going to be sick again, or at the very least give himself a painful migraine.

The smell in the air changed, the breeze and natural sunlight disappeared, and Levi lifted his head instinctually, opening his eyes to find himself cross legged on Y/N’s bedroom floor, looking up at her as she turned from where she’d been getting up from her desk, freezing in place when she saw him just...sitting there.

And the mystery continued.

Anger rose inside him--not at her, more at the situation he found himself in and the complete, nonsensical nature of it all--and he got to his feet before she could react, his eyes stormy.

“What the fuck is this?” Levi snapped, arm spread out to indicate the world around them.  Knowing that simple sentence could easily be taken out of context and misconstrued with how out of the blue it was, he pressed on before she could answer the first question.  “None of this is normal, it’s not even possible!  A person doesn’t blink and find themselves somewhere else entirely--and I don’t even know where here is, because it sure as hell isn’t in the Walls!”

She hesitated in front of him, teeth biting down slightly into her lower lip as she endured his outburst, concern and a reflection of his own confusion in her gaze.  “I think we need to talk.”

“You don’t say,” he said bitingly.

She ignored his sour tone, putting her hair up and heading for the door.  “C’mon--this is probably a conversation to have in private, and we’ll have a better chance of that if we’re out of the house when my mom comes home,” she said.  Levi followed with an impatient air, watching her scribble a note to her mother telling the woman she was going to be at the park before they headed out of the house, Levi falling into step beside her.

“Last time got me thinking about this whole situation, too,” she started quietly as they walked, eyes fixed forward and a small frown on her face.  “I still don’t know what happened, and I don’t expect you to tell me, but your sudden appearance and then your later disappearance, whatever happened in that clearing…”

She let out a slow breath, eyes cast downwards for a moment.  “When we were younger, I didn’t think anything of it--it was just normal for us, you know?  But after that, it was a bit of a rude wake up call.  I started thinking about what little you’ve told me about where you’re from and how much you haven’t encountered before.”  She turned to meet his gaze.  “You said you were from someplace called the Underground, right?”

Levi nodded, gaze fixed steadily on her as he waited for her to get to the point instead of ramble on about a bunch of things he already knew because he’d been the one to experience it or he’d come to the questions on his own.

“Well, I looked into it to see if I could find the place you were talking about.  I came up with things like the Underground Railroad, or a bunch of clubs, a general reference to any shady business that isn’t done in broad daylight or to anything that’s done in secret with an exclusive group, a reference to the activities in 1920s Prohibition, shows, shopping centers underground, but I couldn’t find a place called the Underground that was an actual city like you...well, vaguely described.  It doesn’t exist.”

“I live there--I’m pretty certain it exists,” Levi deadpanned, all the while trying to figure out what parts of her explanation meant.  1920s?  Surely she didn’t mean a decade--they were only in the 800s.

“Yes, for you it does, but here, it doesn’t.”

“You’re not making any sense.”

“Okay then--these walls you just mentioned back there--what did you mean by that?”

For some reason, some strange kind of dread was settling in his stomach as they spoke.  “Wall Maria, Wall Rose, Wall Sina, the three walls on the surface that keep out the Titans from destroying the rest of humanity.”

Y/N did a full stop, blinking rapidly and visibly leaning back as she processed that information as if she’d never heard of such a thing before.  The sinking feeling in Levi’s gut seemed to solidify.

“We are going to come back to that, but for now, proving my point,” she eventually said, resuming her pace.  “We have nothing like that.  Sure, there’s the Great Wall of China and what’s left of the Berlin wall, but we don’t have any Maria, Rose, Sina, walls.  The only titans I can think of are the beings that came before gods in Greek mythology.  And I’m pretty sure humanity isn’t on the brink of destruction, because there’s billions worldwide.”

Levi held out a hand to stop her, doing his best to hide just how disturbed he was right now.  Once again, he wasn’t recognizing some of the names she threw out, and what she was starting to suggest was crazy talk.  “That’s impossible.”

“That’s my point--well, what I’m trying to say is going to sound absolutely insane.  I’ve never been so glad in my life to read and watch a bunch of fiction,” she said with a slightly wistful look on her face before turning to face Levi entirely.  “I don’t think we’re from the same world--or even the same universe,” she said, throwing her arms out wide.

Levi stared at her for a few moments, long enough that she put her arms down and asked, “What?”

“You’ve lost your damn mind,” he said flatly, turning to walk away and continue down the path.  She jogged to catch back up, letting out a frustrated huff.

“I know it sounds crazy, but it’s the only explanation I’ve got--have you got something better?”  When Levi hesitated, she plowed forward.  “I know you’re real, and you know I’m real--we’ve established that by now.  You know where you come from, I know where I come from--and you’ve seen where I live, we’re here right now!  So the Underground, these walls, whatever those Titans you mentioned are, they’re real, for you, but they’re not here where I live.”

“This has to be some kind of hallucination,” he muttered, a hand pressed to his forehead.  It made sense.  Maybe he wasn’t as adjusted as he thought he was, and this was a running hallucination he’d developed in his own mind to help him cope with his shit life.

Though he knew he wasn’t smart enough to come up with half the shit he saw when he was here.

But another world?  That was insanity.  It couldn’t be possible--it couldn’t!

Y/N grabbed his shoulders and made him face her, her face suddenly filled with surprising seriousness.  “It’s not a hallucination!” she nearly shouted in a tone much harsher than he thought she might have intended for it to come out.  “We’re both real--I can feel you, you can feel me.  I’ve taken care of you, and you’ve helped me.  We’ve played together, I’ve given you food, I’ve carried you on my back.  I’m real, and you know it, just like I know you’re real despite what everyone else says.”

There were angry tears in her eyes, and for a moment, Levi got the sense that there was a lot more going on here with that exclamation than their current discussion.  He was going to have to pry into that a little more later, but right now, they had to settle on a reality.

“Say I believe your crazy theory,” he said, easily pushing off her arms with one smooth motion as he spoke.  “How the hell am I getting thrown into another world, or another universe, without any time passing in my world?  And why, for that matter?”

“Time doesn’t pass in your world when you’re here?” she asked in a puzzled voice.  Levi shifted uncomfortably.

“No.  Except once,” he muttered, looking away, though he was certain that was an exception and had more to do with bouncing between--

Shit, he was buying into this already, wasn’t he?

“I don’t know how or why, I’m not Einstein, I just know it’s happening,” she said with a huff, starting back on the path again.  The forest was coming closer, the same one they’d been in last time he thought, and a part of him recoiled inside at the thought of going back to the clearing.

He really hoped she had more tact than to try and bring them there.

“Also, why the hell aren’t you freaking out about all this?  You’re way too calm,” he scowled.

“I’ve had time to go over my theory and come to terms with it.  It’s the only explanation I have, so it’s the one I’m going with.”

Levi fell silent, frowning as he walked with her, that sinking feeling in his gut growing more prominent and defined.

If he believed her, and this was all a different world...that meant that no matter how much he clawed and fought his way up the food chain, he wasn’t going to reach this place.  All of it was...unattainable, because it didn’t exist in /his/ world, and he never got to stay in this world.

It was fucked up.

And maybe that was part of the reason why he couldn’t accept it.

No, what he couldn’t accept was that he got to be teased with glimpses into another world, of a life he was denied and could never really have.  The fucked up parts were the believable parts, what made this easier to swallow.

He could never stay, and there wasn’t anything like this for him to find in his world, so it was something he could never have shoved into his face but always slipping out of his grasp.

It fell perfectly in tune with the shit life he’d had so far.

Y/N grasped his wrist lightly, pulling him in the direction of a forest path.  He lightly pulled his wrist free this time, and she turned her head away so he wouldn’t see her reaction.  He was still following her into the forest, though--he just wasn’t letting her pull him along like a limp doll.

“I figured now that we know this is what’s happening--what might be happening--” she corrected after seeing the still-doubtful look on his face.  If it was their reality, it was going to be a while for Levi to actually swallow it.  “We can at least talk to each other about our realities.  It might help us figure out what’s going on.  Or at least make it more real.  And we’ll know more about each other.”

Her tone sounded like she was trying to stay positive, but Levi was currently too caught up in the shitty end of the stick he was left holding while she seemed ecstatic, like she was discovering new land and reading a good book.  It made him feel sick.  She got all the good parts of this situation, a friend and a discovery, but what did he get?  He was the starving man in front of the feast he couldn’t have.

“What’s the fucking point?” he said venomously, and she came to a full halt at his tone, taken aback and--now he could see it--hurt by his tone.  But he pressed on, hurt and angry himself at the unfairness of the situation.  “Sure, it’s all great for you, so fucking exciting, but me?  My life’s shit.  Before I found my way to the surface, I thought this was right there if I tried hard enough, but now--now you’re telling me it’s a whole ‘nother world.  What the fuck is this for me other than the universe showing me more shit I can’t have?  What’s the point if I’m just going to keep getting kicked back into the goddamn dirt every time I see this place.  It doesn’t even fucking matter, does it?” Levi fumed.

It had to be the most he’d ever spoken to her at once, and here he was using it to shoot barbs at her.  But right now he was too mad to care.

Her eyes were downcast, lips pressed together, shoulders slightly hunched.  She might have been on the edge of tears.  In that moment, he started to regret his barbed words.  Yes, he was angry.  In the past he’d envied her what she had, but it had always been soothed by the thought that he might be able to reach it in the future.  He didn’t have that anymore.  So far, he’d always been here in flickers, a few days at the most before he was inevitably sent back to the exact moment he’d left.

What did it matter if he couldn’t stay?  What did it matter if nothing changed?  This was her reality, she got to stay here, while he was kicked back into the dirt--literally.  He hated it, and he thought a part of him might hate her for it.

“It’s still real, though,” she said softly, her voice a mere whisper and trembling with her barely held back tears.  “Your time here isn’t any less real.  It still counts for something.”

”...I didn’t want you to be alone…”

”I’m happy you came back, Levi.”  “Me too.”  “You’ll have to go back though, right?”  “Yeah.”  “Promise you’ll come back, again?”  “All Right.”

Piano music filtered through the air, soft and gentle, even if it occasionally stuttered or halted under fingers that were still learning.

“I won’t leave, Levi.  Not really.  I’ll always be here when you need me most.  I’m usually here waiting and looking for you to come back, anyway.”

”Let’s get you home so you can get clean.”

He was surrounded in warmth and comfort, a hand gently rubbing his back, another small body curled up close to him, offering him companionship and care...

”You’re going to be okay...I’m right here…

Levi looked away.

She was right.  He was just letting his anger get the best of him.  It still mattered.  Every bit of it.  Or was he really going to say that every kindness she’d extended to him meant nothing because she happened to--damn, he was admitting it--be from another world?  No.  Those kindnesses had meant everything to him--especially when they first met.  When Kenny left.  And recently…

“I’m sorry,” he muttered, feeling chastised by himself for speaking so harshly to her and making her tear up.  Shit, what was wrong with him?

She didn’t say anything.  The silence stretched a little longer between them before she spoke up again.

“Tell me about where you come from?” she asked timidly, and Levi looked at her doubtfully again, thinking of all those times he’d stayed quiet to shelter her from his reality.  Now he knew even the surface was worse than anything she had to deal with here, after that comment about humanity not being on the brink of extinction and Titans not even being a reality here.

“I want to understand…” she hesitated, withdrew into herself a little, and backtracked to rephrase her words.  What had she been about to say?  “Maybe if I know more about where you’re from, I can understand why this is difficult for you?  I don’t want to be insensitive or ignorant, I just...I just want to help.  And I can help better if I know,” she finished in a tiny voice.

“You don’t want to know about where I’m from--” Levi started to say dismissively, but she cut him off with that rare spark he kept glimpsing returning for a brief moment.

“I do,” she said firmly, a hard edge in her eyes before her features softened again.  “Besides, if you explain what your world is like, it might make explaining mine a little easier.”

She always charged in headfirst with the emotional stuff before adding the emotional stuff to try and be convincing.

He didn’t like the thought of exposing her to the dark underbelly that was his world, but she was so earnest--she really did want to understand, and as long as he’d known her, she’d always wanted to help in some way or another.  She’d always been helpful and caring, and he really hoped that talking about a place as dark as where he came from wasn’t going to taint that.

“Fine.”

He would talk about it, but he was still going to try and water it down for her sake.  She didn’t need to know the gritty details, just the general gist of what his world was like.  He could spend his time focusing on the technical parts and gloss over the graphicness of his life.

The two of them kept walking down the path until they found a stump to sit on just off the path, sitting side by side on the rim of the stump as they started to talk about their worlds, where they were from, what it was like, and answered questions from one another about certain details or things they had.

He felt shaken after their conversation.

The way she talked about her world, it made it look like Levi was stuck in the stone age or something.  Machines that did chores for them and performed crafting tasks that for him there were entire professional trades revolving around, transportation without horses, boats that flew in the air, lights that ran on some kind of power like lightning, machines to control the temperature inside houses, a world brimming with people and no man eating creatures bent on destroying them.

Besides man itself.

Hell, he began to wonder why there would be any interest in his world once he realized just how behind his world was.  Of course it was a different world, but still, it was even less interesting when Levi was trapped below ground and couldn’t tell her much about the world above him besides what he’d heard in stories and the brief glimpse he got running around trying to find her.

She did slip up and say that it was like something out of one of her dark fantasy books, but she’d caught how insensitive that had sounded and quickly apologized, cheeks burning.

There was plenty to talk about and discover about their worlds, but after a while, their throats started to hurt from all the talking, and they grew quiet.  Leaning against one another on the stump, Levi gazed up at the canopy of trees above them, listening to the sounds of the forest and Y/N’s breathing beside him.

“Levi?” she eventually asked in a soft voice.  He shifted slightly to look at her, wondering what she would ask about next.

“What happened?  The last time you where here?” she asked in a voice barely above a whisper.

“You don’t want to know,” he said bluntly, voice coming off stiff and distant.

“I’m not stupid.  I know it was bad.  I know you got really hurt...and there’s only one way there was that much blood afterwards--”

“Stop asking,” Levi cut her off, pulling away and standing up again to walk a few steps away and try and cool down.  Not only did he not want her to know what had happened, to not realize where he lived was that dangerous, but he didn’t want to be thinking about it, he didn’t want to be reliving it.

He turned back to face her, and she’d pulled her knees up to her chest, looking every bit the kid that they both still were.  Though they sure weren’t acting like it.  His situation explained itself.  Hers?  She was starting to show a maturity beyond her age with how she’d handled the last experience.

Now that he thought about it...even when they’d been smaller, with all the times she’d asked to play games and have fun, she’d had an...awareness, about her.  There was the discussion they’d had after she’d been beat up at school, and the time when her parents were fighting about her father going back to war.  Hell, she’d said it herself when they were younger that she’d noticed he didn’t play enough.  Just because she was always acting carefree and playful around him didn’t mean she lacked maturity.  She might have been doing it for his sake this entire time.

He needed to give her more credit.  He still wasn’t going to willingly dump the fucked up parts of his life on her, but at least he could be a little wiser about her maturity and know better than to treat her like an ignorant child, even by accident.

“Okay,” she relented, her voice still low and soft.  “But Levi?  If you ever need to talk, or anything else, I’ll be here...okay?”

Levi didn’t answer or nod, looking back at the ground.  He knew she would--she always had been so far, even if she didn’t understand.  He knew she’d be there in the future, as long as he kept coming back here.

After a few more moments of silence, Y/N got to her feet again, facing him fully.  “Well, we should probably head back to my house--it’ll get dark soon, and if my mom comes home and I’m gone for too long she’ll freak out.  I can play the piano for you some more!” she offered cheerfully.

She really was on a mission to bolster his spirits whenever they were together, wasn’t she?  Still, Levi shrugged and walked back over to her.  “Knock yourself out,” he said casually, though he did feel that spark of interest inside him.  He did like listening to her play the piano, and he never turned her down when she offered to play.

As they were walking back, something occurred to Levi, and he looked up at Y/N with slightly narrowed eyes.  “Earlier...you said no one believed you when you mentioned me?  You had your stuff taken for lying that one time, but you said you didn’t lie.”

Her face fell slightly, and she nodded reluctantly.  “When we were younger my mom just wrote it off as me talking about imaginary friends.  But when I kept talking about you despite being old enough to grow out of it, and I kept insisting you were real, they got worried.  It stopped for a while after you brought me home because the cops had seen you too, even if it was briefly.  But now...she has me seeing a doctor because I keep insisting you’re real.”

Levi’s eyes widened slightly, the seriousness of that statement falling over him and a few of her words shifting into sharper clarity and impact.  He hadn’t known she was having to defend his existence over here--he hadn’t even known she’d told anyone else about him.  And to hear her mother thought she was crazy talking about a boy her mother had never seen but had somehow followed them through all their moves across the country.  It seemed like she was a hair’s breadth away from being called crazy, all because she refused to deny that he was real, even if he wasn’t around.

No wonder she’d reacted so strongly when he denied this was happening and it was some sick hallucination.

His jaw clenched, as did his hand at his side out of her view.

It was the best answer he could give.  A sense of solidarity, and a removal of doubt from the one person she’d thought wouldn’t deny the reality of what was happening.

“I know you’re real, too.”

Next Chapter---->

Levi Tags:  @clary-quinn​ @humanitys-hottestsoldier​ @whalerus​ @sunny-flo​

Through The Looking Glass Tags:  @artist-bby @kaz2y5-pie​ @tartheyes​ @super-peace-fangirl​ @huntersbunker​ @nefelimalfoy​ @soft-levi-girl-blog​ @honeygivemeachainsaw @regalillegal​ @sugas-daddy7​ @cathyannecookie @chaoticshepardplaid @roayaloveslife​

#levi #levi ackerman #captain Levi #levi heichou #aot levi #levi aot #snk levi #levi snk #attack on titan levi #levi attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin levi #levi shingeki no kyojin #levi x reader #captain levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #aot levi x reader #snk levi x reader #reader insert #ongoing series #angeldesaray #angelanimedesaray #TTLG #levi fanfic #levi fanfiction #levi fan fiction #levi fan fic #levi ackerman fanfiction #levi ackerman fan fiction #levi ackerman fanfic #levi ackerman fan fic

[pippki-writes]

We Don’t Serve Salads Here [Chef Andre - Part 6]

NOTES: One of my friends got me to join an e-fed, and even though I know nearly nothing about wrestling, I do feel confident in my ability to write fairly entertaining nonsense. And I’d love to share that nonsense with you lot too!

(Chef Andre Poêlon, Toddrick, and other non-wrestler side characters are mine. The other wrestlers—Bert, Ahmya, and Dionysus in this installment—belong to their respective creators.)

(Andre’s appearance is based on Chef Gordon Ramsay. I’m so sorry Chef Ramsay. Here’s your alternate French-American life)

WC: ~2.4K

Installments: Part 1 (The Recipe); Part 2 (L’Aperitif); Part 3 (L’Entree); Part 4 (Fish); Part 5 (Main Course)

Andre had no idea what caused the dumpster to explode. He had nothing to do with it. Admittedly, Andre had been the last known person to throw something away into the dumpster, and at the time nothing had seemed amiss. But then again, it was just a dumpster. You wouldn’t notice anything out of the ordinary unless the damned thing were on fire. Which currently, it was quite on fire, with the handful of police officers on scene begging the Waffle House evacuees to please get back while they waited for the fire department to come screaming around the corner. Everyone in the area with eyes and a shred of consciousness about them had taken to noticing said dumpster, on account of how beautifully on fire it was here at 1:47 in the morning.

“What are you doing? Stop calling 911! We’ve already called for the fire department!” snapped an officer, waving irritably at an unusually well dressed woman who had her phone up to her ear.

“What do you mean, ‘which one’? How many blasted Waffle Houses can there be in this town! It’s a fire, can’t you just see it?” she huffed into the phone, before the officer snatched the little rectangle from her.

“Communications, this is Officer Penny, it’s the one we’ve already called in. Yeah, yeah Main and Emerson. Yeah, it’s still on fire. Thanks.” He mashed his finger on the screen to hang up and handed the phone back. The woman eyed the officer with contempt, plotting her next move at the disrespect he’d shown, and Andre watched, trying to decide who he wanted to see lose their little interaction more. His inherent distrust of police was in direct conflict with his evergreen desire to see specimens of the rich bitch Karen variety fail to get what they wanted.

“I say man, is this the grass?” called out the woman’s husband, equally well-dressed but showing no concern whatsoever for his wife nor for the raging dumpster fire. He stood a ways down the parking lot, hands in his pockets, beckoning to Andre and gesturing to the little spit of grass that ran behind the Waffle House.

Andre glanced at the man, trying to remember his name again. Larry. He liked Larry. Where his wife carried herself like an invading crusader looking to skewer lesser beings on the sharp blade of her privileges, Larry carried himself like a man who wanted nothing more than to let everyone else in on the joke that was his life. As he watched Larry idly twist his fancy leather shoe to squish out a burning ember of trash that had drifted onto the grass, Andre cast his mind back to when they’d first walked in not an hour before.

These were neither regulars, nor, by the lack of any recognition on the faces of his coworkers, known irregulars of their Waffle House. It wasn’t quite 1am, and Andre’s night was young. Or at the very least, it still seemed young. Three decades down and working his way through the fourth, and Andre still didn’t have a good sense of time. For example, his upcoming match—in his mind, he had plenty of time to prepare. Three weeks between matches? Plenty of time. Time to train, time to work with Dionysus on stepping up their game, time to study Bert and Ahmya, think of strategy, record his promo.

But time is a funny thing. When you’ve got so much of it, it’s easy to waste. When there’s more time to spare, what does it matter if you’re careless? And so it was that in spite of all his best intentions, time had managed to slip quickly day by day from between Andre’s fingers, caught up in the simple promise of still having more time to get things done. Now the match was mere days away, and he still thought, quite erroneously, that he had more time. So it was that instead of buckling down and preparing for his multiplayer championship bid, Andre was once more standing at the flattop in the dead of night when the well-dressed couple walked in.

Though it was past midnight, they weren’t the stumbling-drunk sort of rich that occasionally ended up in their diner. The woman looked disdainful, and the man just short of outright amused. They looked together like perhaps they’d lost a bet.

“Well come on, Natalie, have a seat. It’s not going to kill you,” said the man.

Natalie sniffed, as if she could taste the grease hanging in the air. “It very well might, Larry.”

Larry allowed himself a small chuckle, as he steered them both to a pair of stools at the far end of the counter, plucking a couple menus for them as he sat. “You’ll have to forgive my wife,” he began, to both every employee and yet none of them in particular. “I don’t have a good reason for why, of course. Probably that she’ll just demand it if you don’t.”

“Larry!” Natalie hissed, smacking the menu clutched in her hands against the counter. The laminated plastic merely gave a warbled little whump as it slapped down.

Andre was grateful for the small measure of psychological distance that working the grill afforded him. These two sounded like the sort of low-grade trouble that would stop being entertaining the moment he might actually have to interact with them. Thankfully, that would be the server’s problem.

He let his mind wander as he moved his spatula practically on autopilot for the orders already before him. Toddrick hadn’t been by this week—“something something school, blah blah academic probation, family disgrace, if you don’t take this seriously young man—whatever” had literally been his words when he explained, as far as Andre could gather, why he actually had to focus on his studies for a bit. Toddrick had worried more about Andre’s upcoming match than the inscrutable whims and movements of his GPA. Andre and Dionysus had won their last match, which meant momentum. Expectations. The prospect that they could actually really win something big this time—the multiplayer title.

“Do not worry, mon ami, I have plenty of time,” Andre had said.

“Are you sure dude? Don’t put off your promo till the last minute again.”

“Plen. Tee. Of. Time. I can do this, do not worry.”

But had Andre recorded his promo yet? Of course not. Surely it wouldn’t be that hard. Besides, he’d beaten Ahmya on his own before, and Bert’s taste in cuisine was surely rivaled only by swamp creatures and trash compactors. Shouldn’t be too hard to weave those thoughts together into some choice trash talk, right? Andre broke apart the latest set of hash browns before him with the corner of his spatula, musing on what phrasing might be best, when he finally noticed a little paper packet of Splenda bounce off his arm, joining two others nearby on the floor.

“I say, my good man!” called Larry for what Andre didn’t realize was at least the third time. “Your server is busy, and my lady wife is most impatient. Would you do us a kindness and take our order?”

Andre looked around with a frown. Yes, the servers were helping other patrons. It really couldn’t wait? Larry smiled sheepishly, and his wife returned Andre’s frown with a steely glare of her own.

“Ok?” Andre said reluctantly.

“Splendid,” said Larry, flipping over the menu in his hands and looking at it intently. “She would like a blueberry waffle, no make that two of them, and I’ll have—“

“Something healthy,” hissed Natalie, glaring now at Larry.

“Something delicious,” Larry mused, looking the menu over again. He seemed to only be doing this for the benefit of irritating his good lady wife.

“A salad,” Natalie snapped at Andre, her eyes locking back onto him. “He will have a salad.”

Andre scoffed, and the words stepped out of his mouth before he could even think of keeping them in check. “Madame. We do not serve salads here.”

Natalie looked at him like she’d been slapped, and before she could even open her mouth, eyes darting down to the menu, the server Shelly returned, stepping between them as she did.

“Salads?” Shelly gently took the menu right out of Natalie’s hand as she walked by. “Yeah we do. Right here, Andre.” Shelly held the menu toward Andre, tapping her thumb next to a green menu header emblazoned “SALADS” with all of two choices listed below.

Andre made a confused face. In all his time so far with the Waffle House, he’d not heard a single person order a salad. He looked at Larry and Natalie, who had taken to arguing quietly with each other about “healthy choices,” and at Shelly, who simply shrugged.

“Alright then,” said Andre, going to find the lettuce. “A salad.”

What Andre managed to find, technically and genetically, was certainly lettuce. It was also sad, limp, quite possibly a little slimy, and absolutely unservable.

“My mistake,” Andre said to the couple, the corners of his mouth only twitching occasionally in irritation. “We do serve salads. But we do not serve salads today. The lettuce has all…gone wrong.”

“Terrible!” Larry replied, a big smile on his face in direct contrast with his words. “Absolutely terrible. Nothing to be done for it my love. I’ll just—“

But Natalie was having none of it and quickly cut Larry off. “Well go get some more lettuce. Did you check the back? How can you not have something you claim to serve?”

Andre took a moment before making his reply. He certainly did not claim to serve salads here, actually. But that wasn’t the right thing to say. Instead, he ground out, “let me check again,” and walked right out the back to the dumpster, because he’d already checked every refrigerator they had and knew the only lettuce in this building was the sorry sack of leaves he already knew he wouldn’t serve.

Of course there was no lettuce back here either, except for the horrible bag now in his hands, and that wasn’t so much lettuce as food poisoning and a lawsuit waiting to happen. There was the dumpster, and Andre threw the lettuce in. He looked around. There was a cop car in the parking lot of the Red Carpet Inn, the officer’s face lit by the pale glow of their laptop, probably out and about on another mostly pointless directed patrol. There was the little patch of grass that stretched off from behind the fence around the dumpster. There was little else. Andre sighed.

Go get some more lettuce, she says. Andre laughed sharply to himself, recalling the impossibility of getting any sort of groceries after midnight now in this town. Of course there was no lettuce to be had, no black market for leafy greens to be sold under cover of darkness from the bed of a pickup truck. Unless he wanted to go break into a grocery store—absolutely not—a salad simply wasn’t happening.

He walked over to the grass, yanking a fistful of blades out of the ground, and headed back inside.

Honestly, the explosion practically saved Andre’s life. Or at least his ass. He walked back in, stopped in front of Natalie, and said evenly, “Madame. I am afraid the only green leaves we have in the back are these.” As he spoke the last word, he gently opened his clenched fist just above the counter, and drew his hand away to reveal a pile of parking lot grass neatly dropped in front of her.

Larry’s laugh was practically a scream, a wallop of delighted exclamation, and as the rage crept up Natalie’s face, her mouth opening to begin a tirade, an even louder BOOM rocked the building, completely overthrowing the conversation at hand.

Merde, thought Andre, the promo. This was a big deal, and he’d been wasting time for weeks. What was he doing? He should have been doing so much more, but instead he’d all but sabotaged himself by putting everything off. His training. His teamwork. His stupid promo. It was almost like, what? He was afraid of winning? Afraid of succeeding, of really putting his all in and reaching a point of no return?

Or was he afraid of putting his all in, and it still not being enough to win when it counts?

He watched the fire department approach the dumpster, point at the ground, and heard a cry go up for the hazmat team, everyone backing away again.

“—repeat, some kind of white powder trailing to the dumpster, I want the hazmat team to identify before we work fire suppression, currently limited to the dumpster, dumpster is fully involved—“

Andre sighed to himself. What was done—or more accurately, not done—couldn’t be changed now. Better make the most of the time he had left. At the very least, summon up his best blustery insults and proudly proclaim that he and Dionysus would emerge victorious when the final count came down on Tuesday night.

He admired the fire. Hm. Might make quite the backdrop. He turned to Larry. “Ah, sir. Could you perhaps do me a favor?”

It’s amazing what you can do with the right camera angle. Larry got the phone just right, looking slightly up at Andre, who stood with arms crossed, a blazing inferno behind him.

“I will make this quick,” said Andre with a smirk. “As you can see, I’ve got other fires to put out.”

“Bert! Ahmya! Multiplayer champions? Ha! I’ve seen raccoons crawl out of that dumpster with better taste than the two of you.” He jerked a thumb over his shoulder at the dumpster, which had the decency to roar a little brighter as the flames dug into some new truly heinously flammable substance deep within. Andre affected a scolding tone. “Don’t you know, you are what you eat?”

Andre sneered triumphantly. “And all you two eat is trash, so it is to the trash that Al Fresco is going to take you. Right where you belong.”

If you listened very carefully, just before the recording ended, you could hear the battalion chief swearing loudly in the background before the dumpster rocked with another boom.

“Son of a—RUN A LINE! GET THIS DAMN THING PUT OUT! IT’S ONLY FLOUR!”

Next Course: Part 7 (Munsters in the Shadows)

#my writing #original story #Original writing #original fiction #original work #fantasy wrestling #wrestling fiction #andre poelon