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kdram-chjh · 2 years
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Cdrama: The Lady in Butcher’s House (2022)
Gifs of Ending of cdrama “The Lady in Butcher’s House”
【ENG SUB】 《玉面桃花总相逢 The Lady in Butcher’s House》 第2集 张含韵逃婚欲离家出走 【芒果TV青春】
Watch this video on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3mKfJRq98Go
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alcoveofconcealment · 8 months
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I like to think that Percy goes out of his way to give multiple tours of the castle to first year's during the first couple months. It can be difficult to navigate with the moving staircases.
Too bad nobody informed this 15 year old that a pack of 12 year-olds are not gonna be paying attention when they could instead just talk to their new friends/dormmates
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Character, book, and author names under the cut
Thomas Lightwood- The Last Hours by Cassandra Clare
Wei Wuxian- Mo Dao Zu Shi/Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu
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illustraction · 1 month
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VERTIGO (1958) - AMP: ALTERNATIVE MOVIE POSTERS (Part 9/10)
One of the most colorful movie ever filmed and my favorite Alfred Hitchcock movie is without a doubt Vertigo. That masterpiece also inspired tens of designers/Artists in the last 12 years who each added a new visual twist on the AMP / limited edition prints gathered above (Click on each image for details).
Director: Alfred Hitchcock Actors: James Stewart, Kim Novak
ALL OUR AMP / Limited edition prints ARE HERE
If you like this entry, check the other 9 parts of this week’s Blog as well as our Blog Archives
All our NEW POSTERS are here All our ON SALE posters are here
The posters above courtesy of ILLUSTRACTION GALLERY
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jaratedeguadalupe · 1 year
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stuck with the idea that remus straight up takes cups from the sink with fucking dish soap in it, and casually puts coffee or fucking orange juice in it in the morning like he didn't just commit a war crime 
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nakeddeparture · 1 year
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Rosemund Thomas Tonge of Tonge’s Advance Learning Centre.
https://youtu.be/L3TY2oSn6Gk
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Laughing and bubbly one minute, then the next minute …. Naked!!
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demospectator · 2 years
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“Cigar Makers” Watercolor by Jake Lee (from the collection of the Chinese Historical Society of America)
Rolling Their Own: SF Chinatown’s Cigar Story
A short article on The San Francisco Standard news site recently acquainted readers with the colorful and contentious story of Chinese cigar manufacturing in pioneer San Francisco of the 19th century.  
As historian Nicholas Sean Hall has written about its rise, “[t]he cigar-making industry, just as had been the case with gold mining two decades prior, had outgrown its artisanal phase. A newly developed mold had simplified cigar shaping and it no longer made sense for one individual to see the entire process through from beginning to end. As a result, the industry now relied on enormous, highly capitalized cigar-making firms, which, through routinization, allowed these firms to hire unskilled laborers (i.e., the Chinese) to begin the process of cigar making.”
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The patent drawing of DuBrul’s innovative cigar mold.  According to Tony Hyman “[n]o evidence exists as to when moulds arrived in the U.S.  Some writers claim a date as late as 1870. Most place it in the 1860’s.”
Five decades ago, the Chinese Historical Society’s first generation of historians wrote about the city’s cigar industry in the groundbreaking publication, A History of the Chinese in California:  A Syllabus (Thomas W. Chinn, Editor, pub. Chinese Historical Society of America, 1969) as follows:
“The first large scale introduction of Chinese into manufacturing occurred in the cigar industry. The traditional date is given as 1859 when Englebricht and Levy hired Chinese workers in their establishment in San Francisco.[ ]  The Segar (cigar) Maker’s Association in November of that year passed a resolution in opposition to the hiring of these workers, claiming that the action “is tending to destroy the true basis of our country's prosperity” and that it “will prove destructive to the general welfare, and retard the advance of civilization and the manifest destiny of our country** and “will bring want and suffering into the homes of our people.” [ ]
“Subsequent events proved that the cigar makers’ alarm was premature since, at that time, as the white miners were leaving the diggings, Chinese were returning to the mines. . . .   The first period of the expansion of the cigar industry did not actually take place until after 1864.  San Francisco then became the center of the industry in California.  The total value of cigars manufactured in the city jumped from $2,000 in 1864 to $1,000,000 in 1866.[]  By 1868, California had displaced Massachusetts as the fourth large cigar producing state.[ ]
“Chinese quickly learned the trade and soon set up their own factories, selling the same quality products at lower prices.  Even as early as 1866 half of San Francisco's cigar factories were Chinese-owned.[ ]  However, in view of the anti-Chinese sentiments, many Chinese firms, especially in later years, used Spanish names as Cabanes & Co., Ramirez & Co., etc.[ ]
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Detail from “Cigar Factory- Dupont St. San Francisco” c. 1869 - 1892. Photograph by Isaiah West Taber (courtesy of the California History Room, California State Library, Sacramento, California).  In spite of the Spanish-type name, the cigar company occupying the central storefront of the building was Chinese-owned. (Its vertical Chinese signage 長隆邦記 [canto: “cheung loong bong gay”] appears to the left of the entrance.) 
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“A horse and cart in front of Colombo & Co., a store in a building of slightly Asian architecture,” c. 1892.  Photograph by Charles Roscoe Savage (from the L. Tom Perry Special Collections, Harold B. Lee Library, Brigham Young University).  The building at 713 - 715 Dupont St. housing the Colombo & Co wholesale & retail store and the legendary Hang Far Low (杏花樓) restaurant on the two upper floors.  Business directories from 1869-1892 listed in the first year a “Colombo & Co., (Chung Lung) manufacturer cigars, 715 Dupont.” Thereafter, and perhaps in response to growing anti-Chinese harassment, the cigar maker was listed as the “Colombo & Co., cigar factory, 715 Dupont.” Although its business premises were destroyed in the 1906 quake and fire, the Colombo Cigar Company (廣 和 源 呂宋 煙; canto: “gwong wo yuen leuih sung yeen”) would resume operations thereafter on Vallejo Street.  The English letter rendering of the name, i.e., “Hang Fer Low” in the sign above the ground floor entry door at 713 Dupont Street (at left) was used from at least 1872 to 1906.
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“The Coming Man – A Chinese Cigar Manufactory in San Francisco – Preparing the Tobacco-leaf and Making Cigars,” from a drawing in Frank Leslie’s Illustrated Newspaper, May 21, 1870 (from the collection of the Library of Congress).
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“The Latest Walking Match.” In this political cartoon, the makers of cigars in New York tenement houses are shown surpassing Chinese cigar makers in a walk race which was popular in the 1870′s.  
“During the 1870’s, through the years of the most violent anti-Chinese agitation in California, Chinese labor was predominant in the cigar-making industry.  
“In the mid-1880’s the Cigar-Makers Union (white) aided by the anti-Chinese sentiments of the time, and by the Chinese Exclusion Act, finally succeeded in virtually eliminating Chinese from the cigar industry. However, with the passing of the Chinese from the scene, the cigar industry itself in California also declined.[ ]
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A short article announces plans to essentially fire Chinese workers and replace them with New York cigar makers, as reported in the Evening Bulletin of June 5, 1882, and a month after the enactment of the Chinese Exclusion Act.
“The following table shows the relative number of Chinese cigar workers for various years:
Place                Year      Chinese      Total San Francisco - 1867           450        500 San Francisco - 1870        1,657     1,811 San Francisco - 1876-7     5,500     6,500 San Francisco - 1878-9     4,000     6,000 San Francisco - 1892           700     1,200 San Francisco - 1904-5        800        300
Chinese cigar workers in California worked in any one of the following three types of establishments:
1. Firms employing Chinese but work directed by a white foreman. 2. Firms furnishing tobacco to a Chinese contractor, who made them into cigars at a fixed contract price per thousand. 3. Firms owned and operated by Chinese, many of which were conducted on the cooperative system.[ ]
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“Cigar Making in Chinatown, San Francisco” lithograph from the collection of the Bancroft Library.  In 1885, the special supervisors’ committee charged with mapping Chinatown found 427 sites for cigar making.
“A typical Chinese cigar factory is a fifteen foot by twenty foot room with a gallery for greater space utilization, where nearly fifty men worked.[ ] Chinese cigar workers were usually paid on a piece-work basis.  The pay scale varied from fifty cents to seventy cents per hundred, and a worker made about two hundred cigars a day.[ ]
“The Tung Te Tang (Tung Dak Tong, “Hall of Common Virtue”) [同德堂] was the labor guild to which Chinese cigar workers belonged.  The rules of this guild stipulated that guild members shall not work alongside non-guild members.  When a controversy occurred between an employer and his employees, the guild agent would report the incident to the guild.  The guild then appointed a committee to investigate and if the investigators found that a grievance existed, a strike was then declared. . . . 
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“Protect Home Industry,” a certificate issued in 1887 by the Cigar Makers’ International Union in San Francisco (from the collection of the Bancroft Library). The certificate reads: TO ALL WHOM IT MAY CONCERN:   This is to Certify, that the holder of this Certificate has pledged himself to the “Trades Union Mutual Alliance,” neither to buy nor sell Chinese Made Cigars, either Wholesale or Retail, and that he further pledges himself to assist in the fostering of Home Industry by the patronage of Pacific Coast Label Cigars, of which the above is facsimile. TRADES UNION MUTUAL ALLIANCE 1887 S.F. . . .”
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Invoice, dated March 22, 1887, and receipt of April 26, 1887, for “White Labor Cigars”
“Chinese were also employed in the related industry of making cigar boxes. 
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“The Smasher” lithograph adorns a cigar box.  Union label cigars made by white labor often featured anti-Chinese cartoons.
“There were both white-owned and Chinese-owned factories employing Chinese labor.  In 1881, Chinese made about one-sixth of the entire production in California.[ ]  In 1904-05, there were five factories in San Francisco with 80 Chinese out of 140 workers.[ ]  In contrast to their dominance in the cigar industry, only a small number of Chinese engaged in the allied cigarette industry.[ ]”
-- from A History of the Chinese in California:  A Syllabus, Thomas W. Chinn, Editor, pub. Chinese Historical Society of America (1969)
Although the enactment of the Chinese Exclusion Act and its extension in 1892 had begun to reduce the Chinese labor force substantially, the harassment of Chinese cigar makers by trade unions, police, and the city’s Board of Health continued.
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A police-escorted inspection by labor union officials of Chinese cigar makers as reported in the San Francisco Call, March 31, 1897.
Chinese cigar makers continued to operate even after the Great Earthquake and Fire of 1906.  The 1913 international directory of Chinese businesses listed at least 30 cigar factories and companies in the San Francisco Chinatown area.   As the deliberate, population-reducing effects of the Exclusion Act took effect, however, the fading presence of the once-dominant Chinese in the cigar industry accelerated, and a once robust industry of Chinese California passed into history.
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“Chinese Cigar Manufactory on Merchant Street, San Francisco” as drawn for the Illustrated San Francisco News, 1869 (from the collection of the Bancroft Library)
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“The Proud Father” c. 1905.  Photo by Mervyn D. Silberstein (from a private collection).  Silberstein specialized in photography of San Francisco Chinatown residents and producing hand-colored reproductions in “actual Chinese color combinations.”  Silberstein’s own ads for his “Chinee-Graphs” promoted “[m]ost of these pictures were taken during the Chinese New Year festivities many years ago when the ancient customs were adhered to.”  
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“His First Cigar” c. 1896-1906.  Photograph by Arnold Genthe (from the collection of the Library of Congress).
[updated 2024-1-4]
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asoftepiloguemylove · 20 days
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THINK I'LL MISS YOU FOREVER // SATORU & SUGURU
Anton Chekhov Complete Works of Anton Chekhov, excerpt from "The Doctor" // 劇場版 呪術廻戦 0 Jujutsu Kaisen 0 (2021) dir. Sunghoo Park // unknown // Lemony Snicket The Beatrice Letters // Iain Thomas The City Rises and Falls // 呪術廻戦 Jujutsu Kaisen (2020-) dir. Sunghoo Park; Shota Goshozono // Samuel Beckett Waiting for Godot // Emily Brontë The Collected Novels, excerpt from "Wuthering Heights" // 呪術廻戦 Jujutsu Kaisen (2020-) cr. Gege Akutami // Madeline Miller The Song of Achilles // Langston Hughes // Mitski Francis Forever // 呪術廻戦 Jujutsu Kaisen (2020-) dir. Sunghoo Park; Shota Goshozono // Silas Denver Melvin (@sweatermuppet) 1.15.22 // Marina Tsvetaeva from a letter to Boris Pasternak // 呪術廻戦 (2020-) cr. Gege Akutami // H.D. Loss // Mo Xiang Tong Xiu Heaven Official's Blessing Vol. 3
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terrorcamp · 7 months
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Terror Camp 2023's Panel Lineup Announcement is here!
We are so excited to hear from all of these amazing presenters over two days in December 🤩👏
Posters, artists alley tablers, and keynote speakers will be announced over the next few weeks, as well as the link to RSVP, so make sure you sign up for our mailing list on our website!
Without further ado:
Terror Day -  Saturday, December 9
Panel A: Primary Sources
"old Harvey (a mulatto)": Sailors of Colour on British Arctic Expeditions (1848-1859), Edmund Wuyts
"Do attend to your orthography": spelling as history in Franklin Expedition Letters, Reg
Relic or Artefact; an Analysis of Polar Artefacts in Museum Catalogues, Ash
Panel B: Historical Persons
Thomas Holloway: Pills, Palaces, and The Accursed Bears, Verity Holloway
"Scarface" Charley Tong Sing: A Chinese-American on the Jeannette, In the Papers, and Afterwards, Han
Failsons of Hudson Bay,  Jas Bevan Niss
“Nor will it yield to Norway or the Pole”: Roald Amundsen as Shakespearean Tragedy, Ireny
Panel C: Cultural Understandings and the Arctic
How Fares the Raft of the Medusa?: Mutiny, Cannibalism, and the Portrayal of History, Brianna Lou
“This Place Wants Us Dead”: The Terror and Folk Horror, Allison Raper
Icebound, Not Down, Hester Blum
Erebus Day - Sunday, December 10
Panel D: Death and Narratives of Death
"Known to all the youth of the Nation": Scott's Sacrifice in Children's Literature, Branwell
What We Talk About When We Talk About Quest, Caitlin Brandon
Funny to think of it as coming home: football, exploration, and the stories we tell ourselves, Rach
Panel E: The Allure of the Antarctic
From the South Pole to the Stars, Emma
The Feminine(?) Antarctic, Sam Botz
There and Back Again: In the Antarctic with Ross and Crozier, Phil Mikulski
Antarctic Roundtable
Out of the Rookery: An exploration of science and survival on Shackleton's Endurance, with Rebecca, Meg, and Avery
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duckprintspress · 4 months
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Our Favorite Reads of 2023
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Inspired by this post from the Queer Liberation Library, we asked our awesome rec-list contributors to name their one favorite read of 2023, and the result is a list wonderful in its diversity of formats, genres, characters, stories, and authors. Check um out!
@adrianharley Favorite: Shubeik Lubeik by Deena Mohamed
@dei2dei Favorite: Consort of Fire by Kit Rocha
@shadaras Favorite: The Spear Cuts Through Water by Simon Jimenez
@terrapwaters Favorite: Light from Uncommon Stars by Ryka Aoki
@unforth Favorite: Mo Du by Priest
hullosweetpea’s Favorite: Hijab Butch Blues by Lamya H
Shea Sullivan‘s Favorite: Death by Silver by Melissa Scott and Amy Griswold
@thechaoscryptid Favorite: The Wolf of Oren-Yaro by K. S. Villoso
@hairasuntouchedaspartoftheamazon Favorite: Gideon the Ninth by Tasmyn Muir
@fpwoper Favorite: November by Thomas Olde Heuvelt
@captainhaterade Favorite: Camp Damascus by Chuck Tingle
@tryslora Favorite: To Drive the Hundred Miles by Alec J. Marsh
@ramblingandpie Favorite: Siren Queen by Nghi Vo
@nursinggeek Favorite: The Heartbreak Bakery by A. R. Capetta
@boneturtle Favorite: Many Drops Make a Stream by Adrian Harley
An anonymous Favorite: Heaven Official’s Blessing by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu
@diroxy Favorite: Add Magic to Taste
@maggiepageauthor Favorite: A Power Unbound by Freya Marske
Lyonel Loy’s Favorite: The Last Sun by K. D. Edwards
@crowbraiin Favorite: Silver in the Wood by Emily Tesh
@not-gwaenchanha Favorite: Open Throat by Henry Hoke
What was YOUR favorite read of 2023? Dare ya to try to pick only one!
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kdram-chjh · 2 years
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Cdrama: The Lady in Butcher’s House (2022)
Gifs of some scenes of first episode of cdrama “The Lady in Butcher’s House”
【ENG SUB】 《玉面桃花总相逢 The Lady in Butcher’s House》 第2集 张含韵逃婚欲离家出走 【芒果TV青春】
Watch this video on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3mKfJRq98Go
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moon-spirit-yue · 6 months
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Once Upon a Time, In a Land Far Away...
(So remember when I said I wouldn’t make an OUAT au? I was a liar. However, I am ending this fic after the first season or perhaps season two because ya girl can’t be writing all that. TW SMALL FIGHT SCENE IN THE BEGINNING ILL MAKE THE TW OBVIOUS!
READ THE NEW NAMES BECAUSE YOU WILL BE VERY CONFUSED IF YOU SKIP THIS! Raya’s Storybrooke name is Rose, Namaari’s is Natasha, Virana’s is Vanessa, Benja’s is just Ben, Sisu’s is Suki, Boun’s is Brian, Noi’s is Naomi, and Tong’s is Thomas. Please enjoy!)
“What the hell happened? I thought you managed to get lost or something,” Namaari hissed the second Raya came back into the room.
“It’s so much worse than we were hoping. Snow went into labor before they could finish the portal. The baby is being sent to this other world by herself,” Raya told her in a frenzied manner.
“Oh my god,” Namaari whispered, absolutely horrified.
“I just, I need to sit down,” Raya stated warily as she all but collapsed on the couch near the door.
Namaari shot up from the bed and rushed to Raya’s side. Just like she always does. Raya can always count on her.
“What does this mean?” Namaari asked worriedly.
“It means that Emma’s going to need to find a way to break the curse all on her own,” Raya sighed as she buried her face in her hands.
Namaari wrapped her arms around Raya and pulled her close. Immediately, Raya returned the embrace and squeezed tightly. 
The Heart woman never wants to let go of her. Namaari. Her wife. But now she doesn’t have a choice.
When the Evil Queen threatened Snow White and Prince Charming on their wedding day, everyone was on edge. The Evil Queen does many things, but make empty threats are not one of them.
Snow knew the only way to guarantee the safety of the kingdom and her unborn child was to consult with Rumplestiltskin. Then they discovered that Snow White and Prince David’s daughter would be some magical curse breaker for them all. The original goal was to put Snow in the tree trunk so that she could raise the little princess curse free due, to the fact that there’s only enough magic to send one person. They just couldn’t make the tree fast enough. 
“I can’t believe this. I run from Druun for six years, and now it’s all ruined because some bitch who’s in an eternal battle with her step daughter wants to even the score,” Raya spat.
She had to be angry. If she wasn’t enveloped in rage, she’d breakdown in tears, which wasn’t very appealing at the moment.
“Look, we’ve been through a hell of a lot in our lifetime, and we will get through this too,” Namaari assured her.
“I don’t understand how you could possibly be so confident about that. We’re putting our hopes, our lives, in the tiny hands of a baby that hasn’t even been alive for a full day. That’s too much of a burden for anyone to bear,” Raya huffed. She speaks from personal experience, after all. 
“I know it is, but Rumplestiltskin already prophesied this all from the beginning. Which means that as long as Emma can escape, we've all got a chance," Namaari assured her.
Raya sighed and took a glance at the window. She has no idea where this curse is going to take them. Nobody does. They're at an utter disadvantage. The most information Raya's gotten from it is that everyone's memory is going to be wiped.
“I’m sorry I’m being so negative about this. You’re going to be cursed too, I should at least be attempting to comfort you,” Raya sighed, feeling so utterly defeated. “I just have no idea how we can make it past this.”
“Hey, you’re the most hopeful woman I’ve ever met. I mean, you hoped for six years that a dragon could bring your father back, and you were right. You hoped for all of a Kumandra. I can hope for us both right now. That’s what marriage is. Helping each other when the other is struggling,” Namaari told her. 
Toi, Raya is so in love. She didn’t know it was possible to feel so much adoration for one person until Namaari. The Heart princess simply gave her wife a kiss. One that Namaari immediately returned.
“I’m going to miss this. Something tells me that in this cursed land, we won’t be newly weds,” Raya sighed, pulling Namaari in for a hug.
“You might be right about our marital status, but I’ll still be in love with you. I always have been, and I always will be. There are some things not even magic can change,” the Fang princess said in a soft, comforting voice. 
“Yeah? Well if someone as lame as you can manage to love me in a cursed land, I bet I can love you so much more. Because, you know, I’m a lot cooler than you are,” Raya mumbled, trying not to cry her eyes out. 
“As if. I’ll love you so much in this cursed land, you’ll be embarrassed at how lacking you were when the curse gets lifted,” she heard Namaari huff out.
“You know what? If you can somehow manage to get Rumplestiltskin off my back in the cursed land, I just might agree,” Raya snorted.
“Please. That guy’s like three feet tall. I can totally get him to back off from you in the new world. If I have to keep Rumplestiltskin away, then you have to help me deal with my mother. I bet she’s going to be especially difficult in the cursed land,” Namaari scoffed. 
“I think we have ourselves a deal, binturi,” Raya giggled.
At that moment, David rushed into the room and quickly closed the door behind her. He was holding Emma in one arm and his sword in the other.
"My god, what the hell's happening out there?" Raya blurted as she and Namaari both stood up from the couch.
"The queen's guards. They infiltrated the castle. They're...there's so much more than just me. I don't know how I'll get past them all," the prince rambled while trying to catch his breathe.
"In and out David, in and out. Look, we've got your back. Raya and I will have gladly go out there to offer some backup," Namaari assured him.
"I can't ask you to do that," David said, trying to shoot the idea down.
"Hey, your fate isn't the only one that depends on getting her to this other world before the curse does. Besides, it's been a while since I've had a good fight," Raya smirked, trying to not panic at whatever was beyond those two doors.
"Hey, we sparred four days ago," Namaari reminded her with a frown.
"I know what I said," Raya grinned, feeling her nerves ease little bit more. It's like just looking at her wife is good for her health.
"Okay, less flirting, more preparing for battle," David reminded them.
"That's fair," Raya conceded as she grabbed her sword.
Namaari did the same. They never did go anywhere without a sword. That probably says something about themselves.
"Alright. We're good," Namaari nodded.
"Pause. I want a kiss for good luck," Raya told her.
Though no one was willing to say it outloud, they all knew that it was very possible this could be the last time any of them see each other. That's probably why David had no objection when Namaari used her free hand to cradle Raya's face and give her a deep kiss. Raya decided she liked that kiss so much that there was no way it'd be their last.
"I love you," Raya smiled as her wife pulled away.
"I love you too," Namaari whispered fondly.
Then a loud crash resounded from the outside, causing the trio to face the door with a deathly grip on their swords. When they decided no one would be breaking in, Raya and Namaari stepped out in front of David to take on whatever battle awaited them.
There were six guards at the end of the hall. They didn't look like they had a clue where they were going. Raya's pretty damn sure she could take these guys, especially with her badass wife beside her.
"Go ahead David, we'll hold them off," Namaari told him.
"Dep la, I was going to say that! Can you read my mind?" Raya grinned.
"I just know you too well, my love," Namaari responded with a small smile of her own.
"Thank you, I'm eternally in debt to the both of you. And for god's sake, focus on the fight instead of flirting!" the prince exclaimed before rushing off to send Emma into the wardrobe.
"Tell Emma Auntie Raya and Auntie Namaari love her!" Raya yelled as David sprinted away.
(TW WARNING START)
Okay, the Queen's armed forces were now right in front of them. No biggie. The first guy that came up to her was a cinch to beat. A solid kick in the chest made him slam against the wall and knock the guy out cold. Poor bastard must have been new.
Namaari was dealing with her own trio of guards as the remaining two ganged up on the Heart woman. They were fast, but clumsy. One guard managed to nick Raya's eyebrow and nose bridge. While it wasn't going to do any lasting damage, it'd certainly leave a mark. The force of their hits meeting air kept them off balance enough to give Raya a chance to swipe back.
She checked the corner of her eye to make sure Namaar was doing well and of course, she's beating their asses. After a couple good stabs through skin, Namaari knocked the other three off thier feet.
Raya had managed to stab the last guy in the leg when his guard was down. Hah. These guys are really bad fighters. Then she heard Namaari groan.
"Hey, do you think that," Namaari began, before she lunged herself at Raya.
A Queen's guard jumped out of the shadows and came hurtling to Raya when her back was turned. Namaari was able to interfere, but the guard just moved the blade the side and sliced Namaari's arm clean off. Raya's wife collapsed to the floor, crying from pure agony.
With absolutely zero hesitation, Raya raised her sword and pummeled it straight through the guard's heart. He was dead before he hit the floor.
Then left nothing for Raya to focus on except for her wife. She quickly took off her waist band and firmly tied it around the edge of the spot where the arm was cut off to prevent further blood loss. She's honestly not sure how she did it with her tears blurring her vision.
Once the band was tight enough, Raya moved Namaari so that her head was resting on Raya's lap. The screaming had stopped, there was only a pained whimper was coming from her now.
(TW WARNING STOP)
"Hey, hey, hey, look at me. Namaari, you have to stay awake, do you understand me? If I have to live through this stupid curse, then so do you!" Raya sobbed.
This can't be happened. They've been married for what, a month? It didn't matter that there was a curse or everyone would be miserable, Raya wanted to be cursed and miserable with Namaari. For the rest of their lives. One month is not enough.
"You're...so bossy. Even now," Namaari mustered out.
Raya couldn't hold back the extra tears seeing Namaari in so much pain from such a simple sentence. She's trying so hard to stay awake.
"Thanks for the defense back there. That guy totally would have sliced right through my heart if you hadn't done anything," Raya whispered, tears still stubbornly streaming down her face.
"I know. I'd rather lose an arm than lose you," Namaari said.
"I wish you didn't have to lose one at all," Raya told her honestly.
"Will you still love me even if I only have one arm?" Namaari blurted.
God, how stupid is this woman?
"That may have been the most ridiculous shit you've ever said in your entire life, Namaari. Of course I'll love you without the arm. Besides, you've seen what dragon magic can do with those metal arms. Once this curse business is settled, you can get a magical metal arm and you're gonna look so badass," Raya choked out with a small smile on her lips.
"You think I'd look hot with a metal arm?" Namaari grinned.
Even though the reason why is so painfully stupid, Raya's just happy to see that smile.
"Duh. I think you'd look hot with anything. Do you think I'll look hot with the eyebrow and nose scar? The wounds are kind of deep," Raya sniffled.
"You're always hot. The scars will add to it. I wanna kiss them when they're healed," Namaari mumbled, seeming to drift off.
"Aye! Stay with me, One Armed Wonder!" Raya snapped.
"Did you just call me One Armed Wonder?" Namaari mumbled incredulously.
"Too soon?" Raya sheepishly asked.
"I want that engraved on my metal arm," Namaari decided with a giggle.
Raya laughed a bit too. It's so hard to laugh knowing that the love of her life is in so much pain and there's nothing she can do about it.
The ground began to shake. Raya looked out the window to see the black and green fog slowly take over the whole kingdom.
"It's coming," was all Raya managed to say.
"Kiss me," Namaari said.
And how can Raya say no to that?
Raya leaned down and pressed a soft but firm kiss on Namaari's lips. She's feels so safe in the kiss. Even when the world is ending. No one's ever made Raya feel the way Namaari does. No one else ever will.
Raya gently broke away and gasped as the shaking grew more intense. Raya leaned over Namaari in order to protect her body from any more potential injury.
"I love you," Raya yelled as the fog approached.
"Love...," Namaari trailed off.
She was way too weak. It was a miracle the Fang warrior lasted this long. But that's okay, Raya doesn't need her to say it out load to know she means it.
All she could do was hold her wife tightly as they were swept into a land where they were never married in the first place.
************************
(27 years later)
Roseline Heart woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. Literally. There’s a spot on the mattress that has the spring sticking out because of how old it is and it ended up cutting Rose’s cheek. Now there’s a thin trail of blood coming from her face. Fantastic.
Groggily, Rose helplessly grabbed around for her glasses and shuffled to the bathroom. She’s pretty sure this is where the bandaids are. After actually putting on the glasses, success was Rose’s as she managed to get her hands the hello kitty band aid box. After cleaning up the cut as best as she could, she put her bright pink band aid on and headed out to the kitchen.
“Morning Sunshine! How’s-” Suki began before noticing bright ass bandaid on Rose’s face. “Okay, seriously, you gotta replace that mattress. Someone’s gonna call the sheriff on me for domestic violence if you keep this up!”
“Someone’s dramatic. I just forgot to put a thick pillow over it like usual. No big deal,” Rose said with a dismissive flick of the wrist.
“It feels like you never remember the pillow. Besides, you've already got a couple scars on your face. No reason to add on another,” Suki huffs while handing her an apple.
“Aye, don’t sass the hand that’s gonna be dying your hair blue tonight,” Rose warned. 
Suki simply stuck her tongue out at her and began rummaging through the cabinets to find some of her cereal. 
Suddenly a loud, obnoxious knocking at their door caused both girls to groan.
“You get the door, I’ll get the checkbook,” Rose said in defeat.
“You got it, bestie,” Suki huffed while headed to the door. 
Rose heard the door open as Suki made idle chit chat with their intrud- guest. Beloved landlord. She found the checkbook resting on her living room couch. Rose grabbed a pen, wrote out her check, and tore it off the booklet. 
“Mr. Gold. What a joy it is to see your wrinkly face so early in the morning,” Rose deadpanned.
“You’ve always known how to charm a man, haven’t you?” Gold mocked.
“Considering the fact that I’m a lesbian, I really hope not,” Rose grumbled while handing him the check. 
Mr. Gold examined it, front and back, before deciding it was sufficient.
“Well, everything seems to be in order. As per usual,” Mr. Gold spat. “I’ll leave you girls to your morning, then. Ms. Datu, I’ll be expecting your half of the rent on the first,” Mr Gold told her.
“And that is when you will receive, sir,” Suki said with an uncomfortable polite smile.
“Wonderful. I’ll be off then. Have an excellent day, Dearie,” Mr. Gold smirked. 
With that, he walked right of their apartment without bothering to close the door. Rose scowled and slammed the door shut. God, she wanted to take that cane from his hand and bash his face in with it. 
Will Rose ever understand what Gold’s problem is with her? No. No she will not. Rose just doesn’t get it! She’s an excellent tenant. She’s never been late for a payment. Not once. Hell, sometimes she gives Sisu extra cash in case she falls short with her rent money.
Yet somehow, Mr. Gold is never satisfied with her stellar reputation. In fact, he seems to be quite irritated whenever Rose manages to deliver the rent. Which is every time he asks for it. In simpler words, Mr. Gold is always pissed at Rose and there is nothing she can do about it. Rose wins none and loses all.
It used to make woman want to rip her hair out from pure frustration. Here she is, always giving rent when she needs to and she smells like flowers all the time! What more could a landlord want?! 
It wouldn’t be such an issue if he treated everyone else like this. But he doesn’t. Of course, just like any other landlord, he expects his tenants to pay rent on time and he tends to be a no nonsense kind of guy. But Mr. Gold’s willing to negotiate with others. He’s fine with coming to a compromise of some sort. But if Rose were to have issues?
She’d be on the streets faster than you can say ‘what a jackass’.
It’s not like there’s anything Rose can do about it, either. The only person that could match up to Mr. Gold in the realm of power in this town is Regina Mills, the mayor. Unfortunately, Mr. Gold has some sort of in with Mayor Mills, so Rose is totally screwed. 
But, well, Rose has accepted her status as Gold Enemy Number One. Nothing she can do about it now.
“God, I hate that guy. Why the hell can’t he just lay off your back?” Suki scowled. 
“Question of the century, truly. Think you can pick up some fruit while after work? Seems like we’re running low,” Rose asked her roommate.
“Got it. You better get dressed girl, aren’t you opening the store today?” Suki asked.
“Yeah, I need to move it,” Rose sighed while rushing into her room to get ready. 
Rose hastily put on a green long sleeve shirt and blue jeans that were way too big for her, held up by a dark brown belt. She flew in and out of the bathroom in record time. Once she grabbed her satchel like bag, she was ready for work. 
“Have fun, don’t hurt yourself!” Suki yelled as Rose put on her beat up sneakers. 
“If anyone’s gonna hurt themselves today, it’s you. See you later!” Rose yelled as she exited the apartment. 
Speed walking out of the building, Rose was so lost in her own world that she almost didn’t comprehend the fact that she nearly torpedoed into Mary Margaret. 
“Crap, sorry! I had a late start today,” Rose apologetically stated.
“Oh it’s no problem, Rose. You know, I was actually hoping I would run into you today. I’ll be super quick, I promise,” Mary Margaret said. 
“Yeah, for sure. What’s up?” Rose asked.
“Would you be able to tutor a kid in my class? His name is Henry, same age as Naomi, and he’s a really great kid. He’s just going through a bit of a hard time. He’s also a very quick study, the only reason why his grades have been slipping is because he lacks focus. His mother insisted on him getting a tutor and she has every intention of paying you. I only ask because of how great you are with Naomi and how much her grades improved after your tutoring,” Mary Margaret pleaded.
Huh. Rose really can't remember much of Namoi's progress. Well, Mary Margaret is her friend and a little extra cash couldn’t hurt. Besides, if she can help a kid out what’s the harm?
“That can work. I’m free after 4:30 on Mondays and Wednesdays, does that work out?” Rose asked. 
“Oh that’ll be perfect! I can not thank you enough! Think it can start today?” Mary Margaret asked with hopeful eyes.
Rose frowned and checked her phone to come to the discovery that today is, in fact, Wednesday. Shit, all the days blend together.
“I can do that, I just need to text Suki that I’ll be home late,” Rose responded. 
“You are seriously saving my life, thank you. Okay, meet me at Granny’s Diner at about 4:45 so that you two can get started,” Mary Margaret informed her.
“Granny’s at 4:45, on it. Alright, I gotta scatter before Moe has my head. See you later, Mary!” Rose yelled as she began a light jog to her car.
“Bye Rose! Thanks again!” Mary Margaret yelled.
Rose smiled and waved as she continued her jogging pace. The moment she got into her car, the pedal was to metal. Though she may have broke a couple speeding laws, Rose made it to work a whole two minutes early. 
Once she hopped out of her car that should have been thrown the in the dump years ago, Rose opened the door to her beloved place of work. 
Game of Thorns is her happy place. Surrounded by the soothing aromas of tulips and lilies, arranging the flowers to compliment each, and just staring at all the plants gives Rose a sense of peace. Besides, since the owner Moe French hates Mr. Gold, the old snake can’t set foot in this place. Here, Rose has solace. 
Mostly.
There is, of course, the fact that Natasha Fang is one of the shop’s biggest customers. 
The name Natasha is very fitting. Similarly to a gnat, Natasha does everything in her power to be as big of a nuisance to Rose as possible. The name quite literally speaks for itself.
Unfortunately, that would be very bad for business. The shop could just get rid of every single customer except for Natasha and they would still be kept afloat. She always orders in bulk and tips well, which is the only good thing Rose can say about her. 
Natasha is just so.....awful! Rose will never forgive how that woman betrayed her. Natasha and her stupid undercut can take a long walk off a short pier. 
“Rose, how are you on this fine morning?” Moe French asked as he walked through the door. That’s one way to snap Rose out of her thoughts.
“Morning Moe. I’m okay. I got my daily dose of Gold today, which was super fun for me,” Rose huffed as she set up the register.
“Ugh, that old bastard has no business harassing you! So what if he’s your landlord? He still has a job to treat his tenants with basic respect!” Moe rambled as he began to reorganize the flowers. 
“You are preaching to the choir, my friend,” Rose sighed. 
The two worked quietly together in order to set up the space for opening. Only a couple of customers came in the shop before Rose saw an unnecessarily flashy sports car parked right in front of the shop.
“The gnat is flying in!” Moe hissed when he also noticed this specific car.
Rose quickly retreated to the back room. It’s their fun little code word for saying that Natasha, the worst person ever, was entering the shop. Moe and the rest of Rose’s coworkers all understood the complicated dynamic between the two girls. Said dynamic being Natasha tries aggravating Rose at every possible opportunity while Rose does everything in her power to avoid her.
Rose is very grateful that her colleagues had her back and were willing to talk to Natasha instead. Does Rose realize that it's petty and childish to run from her problem? Yeah. But it works and gives Rose a better peace of mind.
"Mr. French, good to see you today," Rose heard Natasha say as she walked into the shop.
"Ms. Fang! And you as well. What can I do for you?" her boss asked.
"I'll need the usual, please. Carnations instead of peonies this time, though. One of our clients is obsessed with peonies so I'm trying to play to my audience. If you guys can help deliver them this Friday, that would be great," Natasha informed him. (Probably with her stupid fake smile.)
"Of course we can! Come on, I'll ring you up!" Moe excitedly stated as the footsteps got closer.
Ugh, Rose wishes Moe could be as anti Natasha as he was anti Gold. The girl does drop a lot of cash for this store at his core, Moe French is a business man. Rose knew this business would not be half as good without Natasha's participation. Doesn't mean she had to like it, though.
"Thank you for your business!" Moe said. Rose could practically hear the smile in his voice.
"Of course, Mr. French. I'll see you on Friday, Heart," Natasha said with way too much glee.
Though no one could see it, Rose scowled. She worked full time. When the shop is open, Rose is working. Of course Natasha knows that.
The young florist waited until she heard the door close before reentering the main part of the shop.
"I wanna punch her in her stupid face," Rose blatantly stated when she excited the room.
"All she'd need to is grab you with her prosthetic arm and it'd be over for you," Moe reminded her.
"Well I would have made the experience very stressful for her," Rose grumbled as she got back to work.
"I'm sure you would have, Rose," Moe nodded.
Rose internally groaned and mentally prepared herself for this Friday. Even it's only two days away, she needs all the help she can get. Rose is positive she doesn't work at the only flower shop in the world, so why can't Natasha go to literally any other?
It doesn't even matter. Rose is just going to do what she always does. Talk to Thomas exclusively, hide behind the flowers whenever Natasha's in eyesight, and teleport out there before any interaction can occur. It's in everyone's best interest.
The day droned on as usual. Moe decided to close up shop today, so Rose was able to get to Granny's Diner a tad earlier than expected. She saw Mary Margaret already at the diner, which was very convenient.
Rose walked up to the table where she was sitting and saw the kid also sitting with Mary Margaret. Huh, so the whole gang is here.
She was about to introduce herself when she caught sight of the woman sitting next to Henry. Can anyone explain why the ever loving fuck the mayor is sitting next to this little boy?
Rose gave the teacher a look and jutted her head to the side which is the nonverbal cue of 'get the hell over here right now'.
Mary Margaret, being used to Rose, knew what she was getting at walked over to greet her.
“Mary,” Rose said in an eerily calm tone.
“Yes, Rose?” Mary Margaret asked in a meek voice.
“Please do not tell me that Henry’s last name is Mills,” Rose hissed.
“Look, I’m sorry I wasn’t honest before, but he really needs the help and I was worried you’d judge him before meeting him!” the teacher exclaimed.
“I’m not judging him, I’m judging whether or not I’ll be able to even live in Storybrooke!” Rose snapped. “I can not afford to make this kid upset, Mary. I’ve already got Gold on my back for, I don’t know, breathing! If I manage to get on Mayor Mills’ bad side, I will quite literally have no choice but to leave town!”
“Rose, please, he’s not that kind of kid. Besides, one of the things he’s been struggling with is the relationship with his mother. Just give it a shot. One day trial. If you really think you can’t do it, then fine. But please, just try,” Mary Margaret begged.
Rose sighed at the kid that seemed absolutely miserable sitting next to his own mother. Just looking at him, Rose does feel bad for the little guy. And it’s not like Rose has anything better to do on a Wednesday afternoon...
“Fine. One day,” Rose agreed. 
“You are a god send! Okay, get ready to meet the family!” Mary Margaret whispered as she tugged on Rose’s arm. “Mayor Mills! Henry! Here’s this fantastic tutor I was telling you guys about.”
Madame Mayor looked Rose up and down, examining her like she’s trying to decide whether she’s worthy of being in her and her son’s presence. 
“Regina Mills. This is my son, Henry. Thank you for taking time out of your day to help him,” the mayor said in a drawled sort of voice. Then, Mayor Mills stuck her hand out to shake. 
“Roseline Heart. Everyone calls me Rose. It’s a pleasure to make both of your acquaintances,” Rose said with a polite smile. 
Rose then stuck her own arm out to shake. When she made contact with the mayor’s hand, Rose felt a vice like grip in the handshake. But she would not be the one to back down. As previously stated, she really can’t afford to. 
“Firm handshake. Wonderful,” the mayor said as she let go with smile. 
Rose isn’t sure exactly what kind of smile the mayor’s flashing, but she knows for a fact it’s not a genuine one. 
“Well, with that I will be off. The job of Mayor never stops. Behave Henry. I love you. And for heaven’s sake, actually pay attention to what she says please,” the Mayor told her son. 
After planting a quick kiss on her son’s forehead, the mayor was off. Probably to make an innocent man cry. 
Rose stared at Henry. Henry stared right back. 
“So. You wanna play go fish and every time you lose, we have to actually focus on your school work?”
At the prospect of a game, the boy’s eyes lit up with excitement. 
“Uh, yeah!” he grinned as Rose brought out a deck of cards to shuffle.
It may seem stupid, but it works. Rose challenges Naomi to a battle of go fish all the time when she needs to get work done. The ability to make homework fun tends to make kids more inclined to comply. 
Rose decided that she likes Henry after his mother picked him up. Mary Maragaret’s probably right. Just a good kid with a rough relationship with his mom, likely due to her job. 
There’s just one more stop to Rose’s journey before heading home.
Rose took slow steps to Storybrooke’s general hospital where she briefly passed by Dr. Whale. After a quick greeting to the physician, she entered the hallway where the patients reside.
Calmly, Rose sat at the chair right at her father’s bedside. Without saying a word, Rose held his hand stared at his expressionless face.
God, what she wouldn’t give for just one expression to overcome her father’s face. Rose’s father has been comatose for who even knows how long. Dr. Whale insists there’s hope, but that may just be his way of sustaining his paycheck. 
She wants her father back. More than anything, Rose wants her father to open his eyes. 
But just like every single day before, Ben Heart does not open his eyes. He lays on the bed, still as a statue as he always does. Nothing has changed.
Rose mustered up the courage to tell her father about her day because maybe, just maybe, he’s listening. Once there was nothing more to say, she got up to drive back home.
As she left her father’s room, she looked to the side and saw yet another face that has yet to move. John Doe, he’s been in a comatose state for about as long as her father as, and no one’s ever claimed him. Talk about a bad break. 
Rose figured it’d be best to leave before she gets too wrapped up in all the depressing thoughts. She managed to get home in one piece where Suki is waiting for her.
“Hey bestie! How’s your day?” Suki asked.
“The Henry kid is nice. I’ll continue tutoring him. Other than that, you know how my day went. Same as every other day.”
************************
(one year later)
Rose was scrolling through instagram on her phone, waiting for Henry to show up at Granny’s like usual. The kid was running late, which really isn’t like him. Rose contemplated calling him before the young boy burst through the doors.
“Hey Rose!” Henry exclaimed, practically vibrating with excitement.
Rose had to say, she’s surprised. She’s never seen Henry so....happy? Vibrant? Not utterly depressed?
“Hi Henry! What’s got you looking so positively gleeful after a long day of school?” Rose smiled.
“I’m not sure you can handle it,” Henry shrugged.
“Uh, I absolutely can,” Rose interjected. 
“Whatever you say. Just know I won’t be offended when you won’t believe a word I say,” Henry sighed.
With that, the little nine year old boy plopped a thick leather book on the table. It was definitely old and had beautiful golden lettering with the words ‘once upon a time’ written on it.
“Oooo, fairytales? I loved this stuff as a kid. What about this is unbelievable?” Rose asked.
“I know this going to be a lot to digest and like I said, you won’t have to believe me. Have you ever wondered why the clock never moves? Why you can’t seem to remember just about anything from their past? Why no one ever leaves this town?” Henry inquired mysteriously. 
“Uh, one is that your mother never hires anyone to fix the clock, two is just an age issue, and three is because we’re all too lazy or like this town,” Rose explained.
“All of your answers are incorrect! It’s actually because this whole town is cursed!” the young boy whispered.
Rose blinked once. Twice. Three times.
“Okay, I realize I’m not exactly in the height of my life right now, but I wouldn’t say I’m cursed,” Rose laughed.
“It’s not just you, it’s everyone in this town! They’re all characters in this book. You all just can’t remember anything and time doesn’t move,” Henry explained.
Now Rose wasn’t entirely sure to handle this. What Henry was saying is clearly some fantasy to cope with whatever issues he’s dealing with at home. 
“Look, Henry,” Rose began. 
“Just wait. Let me ask you something. Do you remember why exactly you hate Natasha? Do you remember who gave you that dragon pendant? Or the ring on your right hand? Can you remember how you met Suki? Or Ms. Blanchard?” Henry asked, quickly following one question after another.
“Well, Natasha betrayed me. When were kids. Yeah we were young, but she clearly lacks remorse,” Rose said.
Though she didn’t want to admit it, Rose only addressed the first question because it was the only question where she was certain of her answer.
“But what actually happened? What did Natasha do to betray you?” Henry pressed.
Now Rose had to admit, the details are.....fuzzy. Rose can say beyond the shadow of a doubt that Natasha is a traitorous snake that should be avoided at all costs.
But honestly? She doesn’t remember exactly what occurred during this awful betrayal. The person who gave her the ring and pendant were important to Rose. She’s kind of sure of that. Rose is also pretty sure whoever gifted her those items were from the same person. However, Rose isn't entirely sure who this person is. She thinks they were gifts from a relative.
The gold dragon pendant with a bright blue gem in the middle went matched well with gold band of the ring that also has a bright blue circular gem in the center. Little diamonds run along the band making it the most beautiful and valuable thing Rose owns.
“I have a terrible memory, Henry. Anyone that knows me can attest to that. So what if I can’t remember the exact bits of what Natasha did? Or who gave me jewelry? Or how I met my friends? Having the memory of a goldfish don’t mean there’s a curse,” Rose tried to remind him.
“I get why you don’t believe me. After all, you got wronged by a lot of people which made you very cautious and untrusting,” Henry sighed, looking incredibly disappointed.
Rose frowned at seeing the boy so dejected. She tried to think of a way to cheer him up without lying and saying she believed him.
“If you’re so intent on the idea everyone in this town is a story book character, who am I?” Rose asked just to humor him.
At this, Henry’s eyes lightened up. He opened the book and flipped to a page in big, fancy letters that read out to be ‘Raya and the Last Dragon’. 
“This is your story. You’re Raya, untrusting heroine that has to learn to have faith in order to get her happy ending. In the book, after Namaari betrays you, you have to find the almighty dragon Sisu in order to return everyone from stone. Then Namaari proves herself by risking her life to save you and everyone else in Kumandra. After that, you two spent a lot of time together reuniting the five lands and eventually you two fall in love and get married! You were only married for a few weeks before the curse hit,” Henry informed her.
“Huh. Well, at least my story book life has a happily ever after before this supposed curse,” Rose huffed. “Wait, so who do you think Suki is? And Mary Margaret? Oh, you have to tell me who you think your mom is!”
“Suki is Sisu, the dragon that helped you save the world. Mary Margaret’s Snow White and my mom, well...,” Henry sighed, clearly hesitant to speak. “She’s the Evil Queen.”
Well this theory is most certainly going to drive an even bigger wedge between Henry and his mom than before. Though Rose has to admit, she finds the concept of Suki being a dragon very amusing.
“Wow. That...is a lot of information you dropped on me,” was all Rose could say after that.
“Yeah, I know,” Henry nodded. 
“Alright, I’m still not quite convinced that everyone in this town is a cursed fairytale character and you’re fine with that. So I just have one last question for you,” Rose told him.
“Lay it on me,” Henry nodded.
“Who’s my wife? You know, the girl that’s really Namaari but got cursed and is now not my wife. According to you, because I am doubtful,” Rose grinned.
“You’re not gonna like my answer,” Henry admitted sheepishly.
“Oh no. Who is it?” Rose asked, weirdly afraid of who he was going to say. 
“It’s Natasha Fang. She’s your wife before the curse,” Henry informed her. 
“I want a new one,” Rose demanded. 
“What,” Henry deadpanned. 
“I said I want a new one. Natasha Fang can’t to be my wife, she sucks! So pick a different one,” Rose told him. 
“I can’t just pick a different one, it’s who you married! You chose Natasha! She chose you! It already happened, there’s no take backsies!” Henry glared.
“Um, excuse you, if you get to tell me my entire life is one big curse, then I get to have a better wife! What about that girl who works at the electric company? She’s cute and she always gives me a discount whenever she needs to fix up my apartment! Make her my wife instead,” Rose whined childishly.
“That’s not- you know what? There’s no point in arguing with you. If there’s any hope of saving you and everyone else in this town, I need cold hard proof,” Henry sighed. 
“.............................are you sure cute electrician girl can’t be my wife?”
“Yes, Rose. I am sure. Cute electrician girl is not and will never be your wife. Deal with it.”
“............................rude.”
18 notes · View notes
Quality Control Time
okay everyone: realistically despite having read some since last tournament I can't have read all of these books as I am one person running a blog for funnies
so I'm posting a list after I've gone through the submissions and I'm counting on you guys to tell me if any of these submissions don't count (or if someone typoed something in the submission I didn't catch)
that said here are your (tentative) competitors:
Rune Saint-John- The Tarot Sequence by KD Edwards
Quinn Saint Nicholas- The Tarot Sequence by KD Edwards
Layne Dawncreek- The Hourglass Throne by KD Edwards
Silas Bell- The Spirit Bares it's Teeth by Andrew Joseph White 
Daphne Luckenbill- The Spirit Bares it's Teeth  by Andrew Joseph White 
Benjamin/Benji Woodside- Hell Followed with us by Andrew Joseph White 
Sideways Pike- The Spacegracers by HA Clarke
Tayend of Tremmelin- Magician’s Guild series (The Novice, The High Lord) by Trudi Canavan
Gideon Nav- The Locked Tomb by Tamsyn Muir
Ianthe Tridenarius, Ianthe the First- The Locked Tomb by Tamsyn Muir
Harrowhark Nonagesimus- The Locked Tomb by Tamsyn Muir
Dekka- Gone series by Michael Grant
Therem Harth rem ir Estraven- The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. Le Guin
Seregil í Korit Solun Meringil Bôkthersa- Luck in the shadows/the nightrunner series by Lynn Fleweling
Victor Vale- Vicious by VE Schwab
Alucard Emery- Shades of Magic series by VE Schwab
Rhy Maresh- Shades of Magic series by VE Schwab
Elliot Schafer- In Other Lands by Sarah Rees Brennan
Sebastian Black- The Sacred Sins of Father Black by St John Starling
Father Victor Ardelian- What Manner of Man by St John Starling
Wenren È- Devil Venerable Also Wants To Know by Cyan Wings
Zhu Chongba- She Who Became The Sun by Shelley Parker-Chan
Ouyang- She Who Became The Sun by Shelley Parker-Chan
Giovanni- Giovanni's room by James Baldwin
David- Giovanni's room by James Baldwin
Danny Tozer- Dreadnought by April Daniels
Magnus Bane- The Mortal Instruments by Cassandra Clare
Alec Lightwood- The Mortal Instruments by Cassandra Clare
Thomas Lightwood- The Last Hours by Cassandra Clare
Alastair Carstairs- The Last Hours by Cassandra Clare
Alex Fierro-Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard series by Rick Riordan
Magnus Chase- Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard series by Rick Riordan
Nico di Angelo- The Sun and the Star by Rick Riordan
Frances Janvier- Radio Silence by Alice Oseman
Nick Nelson- Heartstopper by Alice Oseman
Charlie Spring- Heartstopper by Alice Oseman
Tori Spring- Solitaire by Alice Oseman
Gwen (Princess Gwendoline)- Gwen and Art Are Not in Love by Lex Croucher
Jack Alston/Lord Hawthorn- The Last Binding Trilogy by Freya Marske
Maud Blyth- The Last Binding Trilogy by Freya Marske
Robin Blyth- A Marvelous Light by Freya Marske
Silariathas “Silas”- Sorcery of Thorns by Margaret Rogerson
Nathaniel Thorn- Sorcery of Thorns by Margaret Rogerson
Ballister Blackheart- Nimona by N.D. Stevenson
Ambrosius Goldenloin- Nimona by N.D. Stevenson 
Neil Josten- All for the game by Nora Sakavic
Andrew Minyard- All for the game by Nora Sakavic
Nicky Hemick- All for the game by Nora Sakavic
Xie Lian- Heaven Official's Blessing / Tian Guan Ci Fu by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu / mxtx 
San Lang/ Hua Cheng- Heaven Official's Blessing / Tian Guan Ci Fu by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu / mxtx 
Luo Binghe- The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu / mxtx
Shen Qingqiu- The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu / mxtx
Lan Wangji/ Lan Zhan/ Han Guang Jun- Mo Dao Zu Shi (The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu / mxtx
Wei WuXian/ Wei Ying/ Yiling Patriarch- Mo Dao Zu Shi (The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu / mxtx
Kelly Bennett- Heartsong by TJ Klune
Linus Baker- The House in the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune
Arthur Parnassus- The House in the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune
Laurent- Captive Prince by C.S. Pacat
Damianos (Damen)- Captive Prince by C.S. Pacat
Will Kempen- Dark Rise Series by C.S. Pacat
Sarcean- Dark Rise Series by C.S. Pacat
James St. Clair- Dark Rise Series by C.S. Pacat
Ronan Lynch- The Raven Cycle by Maggie Stiefvater
Adam Parrish- The Raven Cycle by Maggie Stiefvater
Loki- Loki- Where Mischief Lies by Mackenzi Lee
Theo Bell- Where Mischief Lies by Mackenzi Lee
Daniela- We Set the Dark on Fire by Tehlor Kay Mejia
Carmen- We Set the Dark on Fire by Tehlor Kay Mejia
Seonid Traighan Sedai- Wheel of Time series by Robert Jordan
Siuan Sanche Sedai- Wheel of Time series by Robert Jordan
Shallan Davar- The Stormlight Archive series by Brandon Sanderson
Jasnah Kholin- The Stormlight Archive series by Brandon Sanderson 
Jesper Fahey- Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo
Wylan van Eck- Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo
Nina Zenik- Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo
Evelyn Hugo- The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid
Moiraine Damodred Sedai- The Wheel of Time Series by Robert Jordan 
Yan Wushi- 千秋 /Thousand Autumns/Qian Qu by Meng Xi Shi
Shen Qiao- 千秋/Qian Qiu/Thousand Autumn by Meng Xi Shi
Alex Claremont-Diaz- Red, White, and Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston
Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor- Red, White, and Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston
Biyu "Jane" Su- One Last Stop by Casey McQuiston
August Landry- One Last Stop by Casey McQuiston
Jolene Whitaker- Stars Still Fall by Jules Kelley
Jude St. Francis- A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara
Francis Abernathy- The Secret History by Donna Tartt
Ishita Dey- Hani and Ishu's Guide to Fake Dating by Adiba Jaigirdar
Carmilla Karnstein- Carmilla by J Sheridan le Fanu
Murderbot- The Murderbot Diaries by Martha Wells
Shuos Jedao- Ninefox Gambit by Yoon Ha Lee
Achilles- Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller 
Patroclus- Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller 
Yin Hanjiang- Devil Venerable Also Wants To Know by Cyan Wings
Daja Kisubo- The Circle of Magic series, The Circle Opens series, The Will of the Empress by Tamora Pierce
Simon Torquill- October Daye Series by Seanan McGuire
Kade Bronson- Wayward Children Series by Seanan McGuire
Jack Wolcott- Wayward Children Series by Seanan McGuire
Sundew- Wings of Fire by Tui T Sutherland
Zanja Na'Tarwein- The Elemental Logic Series by Laurie J. Marks
Karis G'deon- The Elemental Logic series by Laurie J. Marks
Thaniel Steepleton- The Watchmaker of Filigree Street, The Lost Future of Pepperharrow by Natasha Pulley
Raff Barden- One Night in Hartswood by Emma Denny
Penn de Foucart- One Night in Hartswood by Emma Denny
Alec Campion- Swordspoint by Ellen Kushner
Richard St Vier- Swordspoint by Ellen Kushner
Nico Ferrer De Varona- The Atlas Six by Olivie Blake
Parisa Kamali- The Atlas Six by Olivie Blake
Sam Black Crow- American Gods by Neil Gaiman
Salim- American Gods by Neil Gaiman
Hunter- Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman
Islington- Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman
Tsukiko- The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern
Zachary Ezra Rawlins- The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern
Dorian- The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern
Katrina- The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern
Katherine- The Privilege of the Sword by Ellen Kushner
Geraldine- Christabel by Samuel Coleridge 
Priya- The Jasmine Throne/The Oleander Sword by Tasha Suri
Malini- The Jasmine Throne/The Oleander Sword by Tasha Suri
Henry Gaunt- In Memoriam by Alice Winn
Sidney Ellwood - In Memoriam by Alice Winn
Benji Ovich- Beartown by Frederik Backman
Renly Baratheon- A Song of Ice and Fire (ASOIAF) by George R.R. Martin
Loras Tyrell- A Song of Ice and Fire (ASOIAF) by George R.R. Martin
Oberyn Martell- A Song of Ice and Fire (ASOIAF) by George R.R. Martin
Ellaria Sand- A Song of Ice and Fire (ASOIAF) by George R.R. Martin
Ead Duryan- The Priory of the Orange Tree by Samantha Shannon
Thara Celehar- The Witness for the Dead by Katherine Addison
Iäna Pel-Thenhior- The Witness for the Dead by Katherine Addison
Vanyel Ashkevron- The Last Herald-Mage Series (Magic's Pawn, Magic's Price, Magic's Promise) by Mercedes Lackey
Galen- Paladin's Hope by T. Kingfisher 
Doctor Piper- Paladin's Hope by T. Kingfisher 
Eliot Waugh- The Magicians by Lev Grossman
Simon Spier- Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda by Becky Albertalli
Bram Greenfield- Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda by Becky Albertalli
Leah Burke- Leah on the Offbeat by Becky Albertalli
Abby Suso- Leah on the Offbeat by Becky Albertalli
Jay Gatsby- Self-Made Boys by Anna-Marie Mclemore
Harold Hutchins- Captain Underpants by Dav Pilkey
Eric "Bitty" Bittle- Check, Please! By Ngozi Ukazu 
Jack Zimmermann- Check, Please! By Ngozi Ukazu 
Ollie O'Meara- Check, Please! By Ngozi Ukazu
Pacer Wicks- Check, Please! By Ngozi Ukazu
Maurice Hall- Maurice by E.M. Forster 
Alec Scudder- Maurice by E.M. Forster 
Clive Durham- Maurice by E.M. Forster 
Cal Stephanides- Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides
Therese Belivet- Carol or The Price of Salt by Patricia Highsmith 
Carol Aird- Carol or The Price of Salt by Patricia Highsmith 
Baz Pitch- Carry On Series by Rainbow Rowell
Tennalhin (Tennal) Halkana- Ocean's Echo by Everina Maxwell
Evander (Andy) Mills- Lavendar House by Lev Ac Rosen
Kaiiestron (Kai) l, Prince of the Fourth House of the Underearth- Witch King by Martha Wells
Max Owen- Magical Boy by The Kao
Remy Pendergast- Silver Under Nightfall by Rin Chupeco
Ben De Backer- I Wish You All The Best by Mason Deaver
Nathan Allan- I Wish You All The Best by Mason Deaver
Genevieve Lefoux- The Parasol Protectorate series by Gail Carriger
Maddie Morrow- Havenfall by Sara Holland
Catherine St. Day- The Lady's Guide to Celestial Mechanics by Olivia Waite
Lucy Muchelney- The Lady's Guide to Celestial Mechanics by Olivia Waite
Fetter- The Saint of Bright Doors by Vajra Chandrasekera
Leonie Jackman- Her Majesty's Royal Coven by Juno Dawson
Red- This is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone 
Blue- This is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone 
Rose- Camp Damascus by Chuck Tingle
Li Shimin- Iron Widow by Xiran Jay Zhao
Cliopher Mdang- The Hands of the Emperor by Victoria Goddard
Lily Hu- Last Night At The Telegraph Club by Malinda Lo
Patrick O’Hara- The Guncle by Steven Rowley
Ambrose Cusk- The Darkness Outside Us by Eliot Schrefer
Kodiak Celius- The Darkness Outside Us by Eliot Schrefer
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pcttrailsidereader · 20 days
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Trash on the Trail -- What's Out There
Bandages, balloons, bullet casings: Here’s how much trash is on the Pacific Crest Trail
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A pair of environmental scientists who thru-hiked the trail last year conducted the largest known and most comprehensive survey of litter on the Pacific Crest Trail. Illustration by Sophie D'Amato/The Chronicle from No Trace Trails elements.
Their findings reflected my own perception of trash on the PCT. The litter I have encountered does seem to be concentrated around highway crossings, campgrounds, trailheads, and high-use areas with easy road access. The issue of toilet paper along the trail is a more complicated issue . . . one that seemingly combines awareness, behavioral change, and some infrastructure support.
ByGregory Thomas and Harsha Devulapalli
Roughly 1 million people per year venture onto the wild and scenic Pacific Crest Trail, the 2,650-mile hiking route that winds through the West Coast’s soaring mountain ranges between Mexico and Canada.
That includes hikers out for a day in the woods, backpackers on multiday trips and thru-hikers seeking to conquer the whole thing in one long trek. Inevitably, some of those nature lovers leave behind micro-trash and bits of plastic litter. No one has sought to quantify the impact of trash on the trail — until now.
A pair of environmental scientists who thru-hiked the trail last year conducted the largest known survey of litter on the PCT, providing a sharp look at the kinds of materials people leave on the trail, in what concentrations, and where. The project was carried out, mile by mile, by Tori McGruer, 29, who holds a doctorate in environmental toxicology, and Macy Gustavus, 25, who holds a master’s degree in watershed sciences.
Here’s what they found.
A look at a few of McGruer and Gustavus’ findings
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Graphic by Sophie D'Amato/The Chronicle from No Trace Trails elements
© OpenMapTiles© OpenStreetMap contributors
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McGruer and Gustavus started their journey in March 2023 in Campo (San Diego County), near the Mexican border, the launchpad for northbound thru-hikers. They’d secured $16,000 in funding through grants and partnerships, quit their jobs and hit the trail.
From the get-go, they found significant concentrations of litter — bottle caps, gum wrappers and rubber fragments.
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Over the next six months, McGruer (right) and Gustavus hiked the full 2,650-mile trail, which crosses the High Sierra and the Cascade Range, to the Canadian border. They cataloged — and usually collected — more than 1,000 pieces of trash. They found lots of snack wrappers, used toilet paper, Band-Aids and cigarette butts as well as novelties like Mylar balloons, a spent shotgun cartridge and a rusty horseshoe.
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The researchers surveyed 1-kilometer segments of trail at 10-mile intervals — a total of 260 survey areas ● (a rate of about 2-3 per day). Each hiker scoped for litter on her respective side of the trail to a distance of about 6 feet from its center.
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They handled trash objects with plastic salad tongs for sanitary reasons and deposited them into waterproof stuff sacks, “so if there was something gross we could put it in there and not worry about it leaching out,” McGruer said.
Certain heavy or cumbersome items, like pieces of an abandoned car, were cataloged but left on the trail. They categorized each item using Rubbish, a mobile app that helps users organize and geolocate litter in open spaces.
So, the dirtiest stretch of the entire trail?
A long segment bookending the San Gabriel Mountains on the outskirts of Los Angeles was the dirtiest of the entire PCT, presumably due to its proximity to a major metropolis. One-third of all the trash the researchers logged during their trip came from this region.
A few survey areas there contained hundreds of litter items. However, the researchers set a 100-item maximum when counting litter in a given survey area. When they hit that threshold, they believed they could extrapolate the trash concentration with reasonable accuracy, they said.
Mylar Balloons
Those shiny, metallic, helium-filled balloons are remarkably durable and capable of floating long distances. Strangely, they are winding up in remote wilderness areas at a rate that is concerning to biologists, as the Chronicle has recently reported.
McGruer retrieved several of them in the Southern California desert — one stuck in a patch of bushes, another submerged in a river. Survey aside, she made it a personal mission to remove the ones she found.
“One day I had like three partially inflated ones attached to my pack and someone passing us on the trail said ‘happy birthday’ to me,” she said.
The researchers found trash in about 60% of the 260 survey zones, meaning 40% contained no discernible litter. The hot spots along the trail tended to correlate with areas of easy access and high human traffic like highway crossings, campgrounds and day-use areas.
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Brian Feulner/Special to the Chronicle
Many of the zero-trash areas were in remote mountain regions like Northern California’s High Sierra and Washington’s Cascade Range, where few people set foot.
That finding tracks with the experience of Jack Haskel, trail information manager for the Pacific Crest Trail Association, which maintains the trail on behalf of the U.S. Forest Service.
“Much of the trail is pretty pristine regarding trash but you do find hot spots where there’s a lot of it,” he said.
The most common trash materials found were: soft plastics, such as bits of bar wrappers or cuts of duct tape; hard plastics like water bottles and broken trekking pole baskets; brass bullet casings; paper shreds and used toilet paper; cigarette butts; and miscellaneous fragments.
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In many instances, researchers encountered single pieces of stray trash, one at a time. But sometimes they’d find dozens of pieces of litter linked to a single event. For instance, in the backcountry of Shasta County they found 50 or more strands of tree-flagging tape used by foresters scattered on the ground.
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What’s that?
In some cases, differentiating rubbish from natural ground materials was challenging. Identifying and classifying objects required four of the five senses — sight, smell, touch and, at one point, taste.
Unsure about the makeup of a smooth chunk of translucent detritus they found in the dirt –— was it plastic? glass? a natural mineral? — Gustavus popped it into her mouth and bit down. Glass, she decided.
“That’s not common,” Gustavus said. “I don’t encourage people to do that.”
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Toilet paper
Used toilet paper left along the trail — half-buried, stuffed under a rock, clinging to bushes — is the PCT’s single, stand-out trash problem, according to Haskel of the Pacific Crest Trail Association. It is a gross, unsightly bane of trail rangers and volunteer stewards. The trash researchers found a lot of it — particularly in the northern states.
“In Oregon and Washington there was toilet paper everywhere,” McGruer said. “I was like, what is happening?”
In lieu of using a toilet, backpackers and hikers should bury their waste several inches deep in the ground, or use a wag bag and carry it out, and take their soiled toilet paper with them. Poop carries toxins and bacteria that, even when buried, can leach into nearby water sources and infect wildlife, Haskel said.
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Biodegradables
Sunflower seeds, pistachio and peanut shells, orange peels — the researchers found them scattered along the entire trail route, and seeing them drove Gustavus “absolutely insane.” Yes, they should technically break down over time, she said, but hikers shouldn’t feel free to dump them in the natural environment.
“It’s kind of a misguided principle,” Gustavus said. “That stuff does not belong out there.”
Pictured: Pistachio shells on the trail in the mountains of Washington State.
The pair completed their thru-hike in September 2023. McGruer (left) and Gustavus are shown here at the PCT's northern terminus in the remote mountains where Washington State meets Canada.
It’s important to note that many PCT users actively beautify the trail each year.
Local volunteer groups, rangers and backpackers are all known to pick up trash they encounter on their outings as a simple act of altruism. Also, eight years ago a pair of young men made it their mission to remove the junk they encountered during their thru-hike; they ended up with more than 700 pounds of stuff, including a mattress.
Extrapolating from their data, McGruer and Gustavus estimate there to be about 200,000 pieces of trash along the trail at any given moment. But that’s not to say the trail feels trashy, McGruer said.
“We frequently saw trash, but often there would be a small piece in one of our 1-kilometer surveys. You wouldn't register that as a ton of trash,” she said. “I think what our survey findings say is that people leave a trash footprint wherever we go with these materials that really don't break down in the environment.”
The survey project, which the researchers dubbed No Trace Trails, was supported by grant funding and financial backing through the Moore Institute for Plastic Pollution Research in Long Beach via the Richard Lounsbery Foundation in Washington, D.C., and the American Alpine Club.
McGruer and Gustavus are putting together a research manuscript for peer review. They’re also seeking funds to help analyze the microplastic content of a series of soil samples they collected during their hike.
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Sarah “Mountain Goat” Steinbauer from Austria hikes the Pacific Crest Trail near Quincy (Plumas County) on June 19, 2023. The heavy snowfall in the Sierra Nevada that year created special challenges for thru-hikers along the PCT. Brian Feulner / Special To The Chronicle
Credits
Reporting by Gregory Thomas. Reporting and graphics development by Harsha Devulapalli. Editing by Yoohyun Jung and Kate Galbraith. Design, development and illustration by Sophie D'Amato. Design editing by Alex K. Fong. Visuals editing by Ramin Rahimian. Powered by the Hearst Newspapers DevHub.
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thebunnylord · 4 months
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Out of curiosity, Thomas’s driver once fed him a popsicle to see what would happen if food gets put in an engine’s mouth. Thomas ate it in one big gulp but the popsicle stick got lodged in the back of his throat and he started choking and everyone began panicking because you can’t really perform the Heimlich maneuver on a 53.6 ton tank engine. But he could still breathe, he just had a stick lodged in his throat and was making loud hacking sounds.
They ended up taking him to the steam works with no other idea and one of the workers ended up getting a pair of salad tongs from home, and reaching in and pulling the stick out.
Then the worker took the tongs home and tossed them back in the drawer where his wife then proceeded to use them to serve their salad that night.
Engines can enjoy a cigarette or gum, but only when they are stationary or else it would pose as a choking hazard. Because engines have no lungs or the same biological components as a human (their teeth and skin aren’t actually teeth or skin, it’s way tougher than regular human skin, hence why they can get into severe crashes and not get scrapped up or have their teeth knocked out), tobacco doesn’t harm them, it does stain though and causes their smoke box to smell like tobacco.
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9 Books
Thanks for the tags @cricketnationrise @14carrotghoul and @historicallysam! Here are nine of my favorite books/series, in no particular order:
Noteworthy — Riley Redgate
Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint (online serialized light novel) — Sing 'n Song
Winter's Orbit — Everina Maxwell
How to Write an Autobiographical Novel — Alexander Chee
Orange (manga series) — Ichigo Takano
The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo — Taylor Jenkins Reid
She Who Became the Sun — Shelly Parker Chan
Heaven Official's Blessing (aka TGCF, online serialized light novel) — Mo Xiang Tong Xiu (MXTX)
Cemetery Boys — Aiden Thomas
I didn't include RWRB since it's my main fandom and this tag game is making the rounds among my RWRB moots/oomfs but it definitely belongs on the list normally
Tagging @inexplicablymine @affectionatelyrs and @celeritas2997 if y'all haven't done this already, plus open tag as always
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