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writingmeraki · 11 months

Text

you're no good for me.

a min ho oneshot !

summary : five times you thought he didn't care and the one time he showed you he did.

( or five times you were oblivious to how much he truly cared and the one time he made it obvious. )

genre : angst ( a bit? ) fluff, comedy ( attempts )

pairing : minho x gn!reader, e2l, frenemies to lovers! idiots to lovers!

warnings : cussing, descriptions of blood,injuries and bruises, reader is pretty oblivious, mentions of underage drinking, kissing, kinda messy :/// ( lmk if i missed anything pls. )

author's note : i don't even know what to say tbh ? this is so much longer than I thought to the point where I think I may have rushed the ending lmfaoooooooo welp I hope u enjoy this still haha <3 sorry for the wait 🤕🤕🤕 ( my own lovers to enemies arc with this fic bcoz I overthought as usual ) let me know what you think !!! also anon pls the angst was less but like it was a v lighthearted fic from the beginning asdfgh- i still hope u like it 😔<3 also also i kinda have a little drabble as a continuation for this but I'll see if i wanna post it based on your feedback hehe so let me know! ( barely proofread <3 )

word count : 11.6K ( longest oneshot i've ever written omll )

based on this request !

THE FIRST TIME.

"Fuck why do I feel like someone just pounded my head with a hammer?!"

You groaned as you woke up from your sleep or rather lack of sleep. You'd only been able to get barely 2 hours of sleep when you'd gotten back from the party last night

A party that you didn't even want to go to but were emotionally blackmailed to and even worse it was fucking Minho's party.

Technically, it's his fault you're in this state of crankiness.

You were sitting up on your bed, hair in all directions as you nursed the headache you'd gotten. Lack of sleep really gave you the worst of headaches and it didn't help you'd drunk a little, not more than a few sips, but the after-effect was definitely there.

You hissed as your bare feet touched the cold floor before you finally found your fuzzy bunny slippers you'd gotten as a gift from Kitty.

You dragged yourself out of your room, now being able to make out people talking on the other side.

"Well look who we have here looking like an absolute angel."

"Shut it Minho."

The retort came out like second nature as Minho smirked at your state despite the tiny concern that flashed across his face when he saw you holding your head as you sat on the floor between Kitty and Q who only shared a look when they definitely didn't miss that flash of concern.

You looked at Q, questioning "So why are we having a family meeting here?"

"We were just having a discussion about weird dreams." Kitty answered you and you looked at her, humming and suddenly a light bulb lit up from your only two alive braincells.

"You had a sex dream." Both Q and you said at the same time, him sitting up while a smirk just formed on your face.

"Was it about Dae?" Q asked holding his coffee in his hand. Kitty's eyes widened and shook her head immediately.

"So it wasn't about Dae, huh." You said as you wondered, your slightly swollen eyes blinking in thought.

"No! No I didn't say I had a sex dream." Kitty tried defending herself.

You lightly snorted, yawning a bit, "You didn't have to though."

"Exactly now spill." Q continued and you noticed movement from behind and saw Minho coming, with three mugs in his hand, handing one to Kitty and one to you.

He was oddly quiet and stiff, now wondering what made him like that because he'd definitely would have said something snarky by now.

"-dreams don't mean anything!" Kitty's voice pulled you out of your thoughts and you sipped your coffee skeptically hoping it's not poisoined, but you hummed in satisfaction at the sweetness that contrasted the bitterness.

It was exactly how you liked it. Not too bitter like how people would usually drink it, you preferred it sweet because you had a huge sweet tooth.

Minho's gaze shifted towards you, recalling something as he swallowed nervously when he saw the small grin on your face.

"She's right! They don't mean anything." He suddenly looked towards Q who was already looking at him with his eyebrows raised, sipping his own cup.

Your eyes opened and you lazily looked at Minho, whose body language seemed even more stiff now.

"You could have a sex dream about someone you've repulsed your whole life." You looked in confusion at his words, one eyebrow raised.

Kitty agreed "Yes, yes exactly thank you Minho."

"He could have a sex dream about someone like…Y/N!"

You almost choked on your coffee before you spat out what was in your mouth, as Minho had a similar reaction.

"So you had a sex dream about Y/N." Q said as if it was the most obvious thing and you looked at him in horror.

"Hello?? Why are you talking about me as if I'm literally not here?" You were ignored as Minho quickly defended himself,

"No I didn't." He said, avoiding looking at you as you continued to stare at him with your eyes widened.

"And if I did have a sex dream about Y/N, it'd be a sex nightmare." You scoffed at his words while Kitty whispered Oh my God.

"Please, you'd be lucky to even have me in your dreams let alone real life." You spoke before you could think about it.

"So you still had sex?" Q piped up and Minho quickly blurted,

"Dreams don't mean anything! Besides I hate Y/N!" He said sparing a glance at you who just seemed confused at where this conversation had led up to.

"Wait a minute-"

"We're getting late! I still uh need to get ready!" Minho said turning around before you could even question anything, not being able to see how red his face had gotten as he ran to his room and slammed the door shut.

Blinking once and twice, you looked at Kitty and Q,

"So can someone just tell me what happened?"

They indeed didn't tell you anything, or rather didn't get a chance to before the door was knocked on and in came in your advisor, telling you about how you all had gotten Saturday detention and hoped last night was worth it.

You groaned as he left, holding the cup of coffee mumbling curse words. The same cup of coffee, that was exactly how you liked it, that was made by Minho. Something you didn't even realize how he knew your perfect order.

THE SECOND TIME.

You'd rather be watching paint dry than be in this boring detention.

Saturday flew in and in no time, were you already sitting in the library for your eight hour detention.

You groaned as you leaned forward, wanting to drop your head on the table before a hand placed itself between it and the hard surface of the table, making you hit it softly and for a second you thought about how warm it felt.

"You'll damage the tiny amount of brain cells you have in there." Minho's voice mocked you, as you looked up, your chin laying on his hand.

Glaring, you didn't even realise how he gulped at how you'd still maintain physical contact by not lifting your head up.

"Screw you." You scoffed, sitting straight up,

"Why am I even sitting with you?" You questioned crossing your arms and the scowl didn't leave your face.

"Maybe you finally realized how obsessed you are with me and felt like you had to be closer to me." He said with that annoying smirk plastered on his face.

You snorted, "Please it's only because it was the only seat available!"

The smirk didn't leave his face, only growing wider as he leaned in to whisper in your ear,

"All I'm hearing is excuses." His voice rang in your ears, noticing the rasp and how deep it sounded, swallowing nervously, you didn't know why you felt like your heart would jump out of your chest.

You leaned away from him, rolling your eyes, brushing away what you felt as irritation from being around Minho too much.

You shivered due to the temperature in the library being too low for your liking, the air conditioning being colder than you would have kept it.

You internally cussed at yourself for wearing a crop top instead of bringing an extra sweater with you,forgetting it's usually chilly in there.

Minho noticed the shiver, rolling his eyes, he suddenly began taking off his own bomber jacket. You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion but they relaxed when you felt a sudden warmth engulf you.

"You'll catch a cold and it'll end up infecting everyone." He scolded you before you could even say anything, words dying down before you could even question his actions, too stunned.

You just blinked at him, mumbling a small thanks to which he just sent you a curt nod, his attention back to the doodling he'd been doing in his book.

"Did he just-"

"Yes. Yeah he did."

Kitty questioned to which Yuri answered both stunned at what they'd just seen.

"Don't they, I don't know, hate each other?" Yuri asks, confused looking back at Kitty.

"Guess hate and love are two sides of the same coin, afterall huh?" Kitty spoke up.

They both paused and looked at each other, bursting out in giggles.

THE THIRD TIME.

You stared at the clock, your eyes fixated on the minute hand that moved agonizingly slow, your head resting on the palm of your chin that was using your right arm as a stand.

You sighed mumbling to yourself about how time seemed to be against you.

“Instead of boring your eyes into the clock, maybe if you paid attention to what was being taught, your tiny brain could finally excel in this.”

You rolled your eyes and turned your head towards the boy who sat beside you.

Pausing a bit when you realised how the sunlight from the window literally made it seem like he glowed, his cheekbones highlighted by it and his lips seemingly more plump and pinker as he spoke.

Minho’s attentions wasn’t on you though, at least it would seem like that because he was staring ahead, his focus on his notes as he wrote what was being taught, his hands splayed across his notebooks.

Even when he sat, you noticed he still seemed taller than you. Sometimes you even wonder how you always end up next to him.

“I’d say take a photo and it would last longer but I’m pretty sure you already have enough of those with you, stalker.” He said, taking a peak at you from the corner of his eyes, a smirk forming on his face when he saw you scoffing.

“As if, besides since when did you care about me paying attention or not.” Minho stopped for a second at your words, hand freezing mid way from his note taking and it was now his turn to roll his eyes at you.

“Because you’re a distraction.” He spoke lowly, making sure you were the only one who heard, and only now you noticed you’d both been murmuring amongst each other as if you were friends just gossiping.

Not wanting to argue more, you just sighed and looked ahead,

“Ugh, whatever.”

You looked down at your own notebook, narrowing your eyes when you saw you’d only written half a page and stealing a glance at Minho’s, your eyes now widening when you counted that he was already on what seemed like his third page.

Damn I really must have zoned out.

Now you just thought of your options, either you skip some pages and just write what was being taught at the moment, finishing what you missed afterwards.

Clicking your tongue, you just closed your notebook, slightly pushing it away. Knowing being at the way back in a crowded classroom was helpful at times like this but having Alex as your professor being another advantage, you folded your arms on the table and plopped your head onto it sideways.

You sighed, relieved at the position, even though it may seem uncomfortable, but at the time, it felt just right.

You shut your eyes, the last thing you saw being Mingo from the way you had positioned your head, with you facing towards him and let yourself be surrounded by the temporary darkness.

“So you’re just going to sleep during the lecture?”

“Yep.” You said still with your eyes closed.

“I barely got any, considering the Vampire Diaries marathon Kitty and I had last night.”

You mumbled, feeling yourself give in to your dreamland.

“You both are terrible roommates because who even has a series marathon in the middle of a school week?” Minho asked you scoffing, turning his head to his left so he could look down at you.

You opened one eye and put your tongue out childishly to mock him,

“Only the fun kind of roommates, now shut up and do your work, let me sleep.”

“You seriously need to be more responsible, I mean come on, you have dark circles right now.” He whisper yelled as he scanned your face.

“Okay mum. I’ll make sure of it.” You murmured to him, the last of your words being softer as you finally gave in to your dreams.

Minho sighed when he heard you exhale softly, seeing the way the sun reflected on your face.

He wondered how you could just fall asleep but then again he knew you’d probably stayed awake just to give company because he knew you didn’t even like The Vampire Diaries.

You’d once told how lame you found it that the only relevant plot was two brothers fighting for a girl, and how it was ridiculously stupid.

He moved his body a bit forward, so that the sunlight could not fall on your face, and upon that the scrunch in your brows relieved unconsciously. He reached his hand forward to tuck away the hair piece that seemed to bother you. His fingertips lingering on your cheek and you leaned into the touch unknowingly.

Pulling his hand away, he gently smiled at you, shaking his head fondly as he brought back his attention to what was being taught.

[ a few moments later ]

“Wake up sleeping beauty, it’s time.” You heard as you felt someone flick your forehead.

Groaning you swatted away the hand, as you slowly rose up, rubbing your eyes, and blinking a few times as you tried recalling who you were and where you were.

“Seems like someone’s nap time was well.” Minho smirked at you, packing his books away to which you turned to him and glared.

“Hope you dreamt of me well!” He said a grin on his face now as your lips pulled into a thin line.

“Yeah it’d be more of a nightmare if you showed up in my dreams.” You said rolling your eyes, and gathering your own notebook, realising it was pretty pointless to have even removed it today as you basically barely wrote anything.

You pulled your bag up to the desk and tucked away your book.

Minho slid a book towards you, making you pause your movements as you glanced at him in question.

“Here, today’s class work and homework as well, if you don’t get something, considering you probably won’t, come to the library after school is over.” He said standing up, to which you still looked between him and the book in question, skeptical of his sudden act of…kindness?

“Stop staring idiot, you’ll get late.” He said as he slowly walked away, you thought about it and grabbed his notebook, putting it in between your own and standing up, sliding one strap on your shoulder.

“Thank…you?” You said turning around noticing he was already gone.

Huh, weird. Well that was nice of him…for once.

You shook your head, walking out as well, realizing you indeed learn something new about him every time.

THE FOURTH TIME.

It was another outing of the nature club you'd join in support of Kitty's new venture of wanting to do new things.

Although initially, you'd reluctantly agreed but you'd learn to enjoy it once you spent more times with nature.

Though sometimes you wish you could just jump off the cliff because lo and behold, Minho had also spontaneously joined it as well.

Over time, you'd just learnt to ignore his shit, just paying attention to your surroundings and focusing all your energy on that.

You didn't even notice how he'd always be trailing beside you though, since the beginning of it actually.

But of course those around you did.

Q and Dae looked at their best friend, both wondering the same thing.

"Do you think he notices?" Dae asked as they hiked up, Q looked at him in question and followed his gaze, perceiving what he meant.

“He is still in denial as to why he even joined this club in the first place, remember how much I tried convincing him to join but he always refused with bullshit excuses but suddenly when Y/N joins, he’s apparently thought about it well and understood it was good to be one with nature, hence why he would be joining.”

Dae shook his head, chuckling as he recalled the denial on his face from when they confronted him about it.

“I don’t even think he realizes that Q, let alone how he always seems to be beside them when he gets the chance.” Dae said, staring at the pair of you, you seemed more than happy to be there as Minho skeptically walked beside you.

Suddenly an arm was placed in front of you, making you suddenly freeze in your place and your gaze followed it to the owner, confusion flooding your mind as you looked at Minho in question.

He moved in front of you and knelt down on one knee, to which your eyes widened and you looked around to see if anyone else was seeing this.

Hissing at him, more so in confusion, "What the hell are you doing?"

He scoffed and pointed down at your shoes, more so your shoe laces.

"You'll literally trip on them and fall on your face resulting in you getting hurt and you'll end up causing problems."

Once again, your mouth gaped at him as he went back to his task which was tying your shoelaces.

At times, he truly did confuse the ever living fuck out of you. Because for one he'd be doing the nicest things but then the gesture would be contradicting with what he would have to say afterwards.

You noticed how strands of his hair moved out of place as a result of him looking down to focus on tying your laces.

You bit your lip to control the smile from spreading on your face and he got up, dusting his hands.

"You know you should be grateful that I decided to be with you right now otherwise your clumsy ass would have probably broken a foot by now."

There it was. The contradicting words to his gestures.

Not wanting to start an argument, you just sighed and shook your head, mumbling a thanks as you walked ahead, having been left behind by a few paces.

Minho glared at you, taking a few steps to catch up with you,

"That was mean of you." He said and you took a side glance at him to see a frown on his face and you sighed once again,

"Thank you so much Minho, whatever would I have done if it weren't for your presence."

You grinned widely, blinking your eyes forcefully as you fluttered your eyelashes.

Before he could speak again, you turned forward and rolled your eyes, continuing your hike.

When you reached the top view, you could see the entire city of Seoul and just how mesmerizing it looked.

As a whole it looked breathtaking, the tall buildings and the miniature figures doing about their own things, the sky's colours contrasting the shades, the sun setting slowly as the last warmth of it bled on your face.

You didn't even notice Minho was right beside you, admiring the city view as well. Though his eyes naturally drifted towards you, even if he never wanted them to but it seemed like second nature to him now, his eyes finding you anytime you were around.

Your own sparked as you took in the little details of the view, unknowingly a smile forming on your face making the tiny depths form on your cheeks. Your hair slightly moving from the soft breeze and you'd laugh at the timing but you didn't notice that as you were too in your own world.

Blinking, he felt his own heart flutter as he whispered so tenderly, you probably wouldn't have heard him if he weren't next to you,

"Beautiful, you really are beautiful."

Looking beside you, you were once again left speechless when you saw who it was, and pretended you didn't hear, asking

"Sorry what was that?"

That seemed to snap him out of his gaze as he looked in front, coughing into his hand, sounding more fake than real,

"Uh, I meant that the view is really beautiful! Yeah the view…" He looked to the other side to make sure you wouldn't see the redness forming on his face.

You just nodded at him, turning your attention back in front of you,

"It is, isn't it? It was definitely worth the hike!"

You beamed as you put your hands on your hips, happy with the end result of the exhausting hike.

"Anyways we should be heading down now, if we were to reach before nightfall."

You paused looking around and found Q and Dae already looking at you both, you waved them over.

"Q! Dae! Why didn't I see both during the hike up?"

"Maybe cause someone wouldn't leave you and your attention was on him mostly." Q murmured to which, luckily you didn't seem to catch what he said as you raised an eyebrow.

Dae nudged Q with his elbow on his stomach, to which Q hissed in a little pain.

"That was so unnecessary!" Dae still kept his smile,

"What he meant was, you seem preoccupied but really we were trailing behind too." He told, his eyes shifting to Minho's for one second when he said preoccupied and you noticed this.

"Well let's all go together for the hike down?"

Minho wanted to protest but he realised it'd probably seem suspicious and knowing how his best friends were, they'd figure it and look into this more than he would like them too.

Plus he wasn't entirely sure why he detested the idea of not being able to be with you only for the hike down.

He hated your guts didn't he? He only just…taught you were too clumsy and stupid, as well as unserious.

At least that was what he kept convincing himself, yet it was far more obvious to everyone around you except yourselves that there was definitely more than just animosity.

And as you began going down the steps, you almost tripped as your leg got caught in a root but lucky for you, there was Minho by your other side, who'd pulled your arm to make sure you didn't fall right on your face.

"Seriously if it weren't for me, you'd probably end up dead by now."

His hand still on your arm, the contact making you feel warmer than you should and for a second your eyes drifted towards his lips as you thought about just how close you were to him.

You pulled away your arm and gulped, nodding at his words nonchalantly as you couldn't get the image of his lips out of your mind, as much as you hated it.

Q and Dae again, shared a look as if silently communicating,

Yep, there's more to this than just animosity.

THE FIFTH TIME.

Frowning at the big red F on your Korean Literature test, you felt like bursting into tears.

Really it wasn't your fault you were bad at adjusting to the language, after all it'd only been a few months since you were taught about it afresh.

Kitty sighed at your frowny face, texting your shared group chat about canceling today's movie night for the time being, your phone on silent since you'd gotten the test.

kitty loml 💗 : guys no movie night today, y/n's not feeling too well :((((

You didn't even notice it but Minho immediately texted in the group chat when he read the message.

minhoe 👹 : what happened????

dae my bae 🥳 : wow look who spawned in this "lame gc" 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔

👑 : ohhh he's right tho but srsly what happened? are they alright???

kitty loml 💗 : Korean Lit happened 😶

👑 : Ohhhh yikes.

Kitty set aside her phone and looked back at you before you spoke,

"What am I doing wrong? I'm trying my best and it just seems pointless now." You feel tears of frustration forming as you yanked the paper away because it just seemed like the red mark was taunting you.

"Y/N, you know it's not your fault, Korean is really hard to learn afresh and see your Korean is way better than mine already!"

She tried cheering you up and you just shook your head.

"No Kitty, I've been learning this longer than you have and it's not even helping me at all if this is the end result!" You wiped harshly at the tears that poured out, your voice snapping at the end.

You sighed as you saw Kitty flinch, not in fear but more so in surprise because she didn't expect you to snap, yet she knew everyone had their own days.

Exhaling softy, you spoke "Sorry, I didn't mean to snap, I'll just…I'm going to take a shower to cool down."

Before she could reply, you turned away, walking to your room, before you slammed your door shut harsher than you wished.

👑 : how's the situation?

kitty loml 💗 : wellll they've gone to take a shower now, but they are pretty upset.

👑 : oh that's not great.

minhoe 👹 : wait guys, what flavour of Pocky was their favourite again? Cookies and cream or chocolate?

kitty loml 💗 : y r u asking this out of nowhere and I'm pretty sure it's just plain chocolate.

dae my bae 🥳 : oh wait didn't you read the previous messages? anyways it was a pretty long thing but in short Minho went to the grocery store to get some snacks for Y/N cause he's "sure" they haven't eaten yet because of how 'forgetful" they are

👑 : code for comfort snacks for an upset y/n to make them feel better because i care but won't admit it.

minhoe 👹 : gosh you all are do fuckinf annoying

kitty loml 💗 : and you are so fucking whipped

👑 : oop pretty sure i can see him blushing all the way from here

dae my bae 🥳 : he just cussed out loud and now we're getting glared at by some grandma, good going minHOE 👹

slayest of the slayers 🙏 : lol

👑 : OMGFJZJZ HIII HELLO R U OKAYY???

kitty loml 💗 : i thought the giggles were me going insane but it was you okay.

slayest of the slayers 🙏 : one way to say i live in ur mind 😈😈 and yes Q, i am fine for now at least, I'll figure out how to conqure this stupid subject somehow.

minhoe 👹 : plzzz it'd be like having a demon in ur head

👑 : YOU shouldn't say that when y/n is probably in ur mind all day and also feel free to message any of us for help when u need it!

You turned off your phone, laughing as you heard the notifications in your group chat blow up.

You'd gotten out of the shower, feeling way better than you had but still just choosing to lay in your bed when you noticed your notifications were piling up.

You giggled when you read through the chats, intervening and feeling your heart at ease when you thought about your friends worrying over you and checking up on you.

You were grateful to have found them, especially considering you were so new and awkward when you joined KISS, thinking you'd never make friends but now you could proudly say you loved them with all you had.

Though as you laid, gazing up at the celing lit up with lights from outside, you thought of one particular person whose actions nowadays made you more confused than anything.

It was Minho, of course.

Lately it seemed he'd taken a place in your mind, ironically having flashbacks to your conversation in the group chat about you occupying his mind but it was more of the opposite on your side.

At least that was what you thought.

You thought over every gesture of his, everytime he seemed to show he cared but then you recalled his harsh words those times and stepped back a bit from your fantasies.

He was too different anyways, a star out of your reach, a boundary you feared to cross, a line that was the more blatant.

So why did your heart feel heavier at the idea of him being out of league?

You gulped when you mentally weighed your options, closing your eyes and thinking of his annoying smirk but even more his annoyingly pretty smile that was rare but when you did see it, it did something to you that made you feel all fuzzy. His annoying hair that always had strands misplaced which you always itched the urged to tuck them back gently, his soft lips, his eyes-

A knock on your door woke you up and you got up putting your hand on your chest.

The pattering in it making it feel like you just ran a whole marathon.

You rose up and quietly walked to your door.

You think you almost puked your guts out of nervousness when you saw who was on the other end.

"You need to check on your messaging skills." You stayed frozen as Minho pushed you aside and entered your room as though he owned the place. It was like something he had that once he entered a room, it naturally became his place.

You noticed he had a bag of something in his hands and you remembered the texts in the group chats.

"Oh wait, did you really?" You asked pointing towards the bag,as he plopped down on your bed, looking at you while rolling his eyes.

"Of course, I know you'd probably starve yourself if you could, that's why I bought something for you." He said and you made your way towards him, a little skeptical and your nerves didn't seem to have calmed.

You sat down beside him, a bit of distance between you two yet you still felt a bit dizzy considering this was probably the first time he'd been in your room.

He pushed the bag towards you, looking at you expectantly.

"Here, it's mostly what you like, as far as I know." You looked through the assortment and indeed, it was like all of your favourites in one.

Your mind couldn't wrap around the fact that it was Minho out of everyone that remembered all your favorite snacks. A little detail but you found it fluttering when someone would remember the smallest things about you. Only this time it felt like your heart would jump out of your chest as you thought about this.

"Well, are you feeling better now?" You snapped your head towards him, nodding absentmindedly.

"Look. Since I am feeling nice, I'll help you out. I can tutor you between 5-7 every Wednesday and Friday at the library. I checked your schedule and saw you were also free those days-"

"Wait what? Where did you even get my schedule???" You genuinely asked confused trying to comprehend his words.

"Out of all that, that's what you want to know?" Rolling his eyes, he crossed his arms "I saw it during the start of the year, to see which classes I'd have to tolerate you in and mentally prepare myself for."

"..." You narrowed your eyes at him suspiciously.

"Oh…Kay?" You said more so questionably, wondering if you'd ever invest your time in someone like that, especially if it were someone you don't like.

He got up to leave, not wanting to embarrass himself more than he thought he did.

"Well uh…I am gonna go now, don't be late! Or I swear I'm never doing anything nice for your dumbass ever again!Don't forget to eat those, seriously I spent money and my precious time in those." He rushed to your door, turning back one last time to you.

"...Just…just next time, ask for help when you need it alright? And it's okay to not do well at times even if you do your best, sometimes it's not your fault." He looked at you expectantly to which you just nodded, still flabbergasted by his actions since he arrived.

He gave one last nod and turned around, slamming the door closed.

What the fuck just happened ?

You asked more so to yourself as you looked the bag in your hands, Minho's words ringing in your head, him offering to tutor you, actually telling you he'd be tutoring you.

Just him. Him and his…kind gestures?

You groaned, setting the bag down beside your bed and falling flat on your bed.

You stared at the ceiling looking for answers for questions you didn't even know about.

And suddenly a sentence rang through your mind.

Gasping loudly as you sat up, wide eyed as an epiphany hit you,

Fuck.

I think I like him.

I like Minho.

THAT ONE TIME.

As a normal person would when they come to be able to identify the confusion and chaos their mind was in and why they were in that state, you did one thing.

Avoid it and the cause of it.

In other words, as a way to deal with the realization of your liking, you decided to just avoid Minho at all costs, at least until it would come to bite you eventually.

You knew your friends noticed your behavior, how you'd basically changed routes and even certain classes, pouring excuses like you couldn't study during that time and it was better to change.

The new revelation caused a lot of changes in the way you saw of his actions. It definitely didn't help when you would recall at the times he'd done them late in the night and it would leave you with a hope that was only growing higher.

Only to come crashing down when you would think about how he might not even see you in the same way, maybe it was just as a friend.

Frenemies.

A term you learnt and as much as you felt like it certainly fit your dynamic, it still left a bitter afterthought that you hated because you knew you wanted more.

Much more.

As you sat down in a cafeteria in Seoul to study, yes you'd gone that far as to avoid studying at the campus just to avoid bumping into Minho.

And to your misfortune,Minho did notice though, how you didn't show up to the library for your planned study session that you'd confirmed but cancelled last minute, how you didn't even reply to messages in the group chat, excuses like you were busy with work and assignments.

He'd scoff when you pulled that excuse, as if you weren't in the same grade and didn't have the same workload. When he would ask Kitty or Q or anyone actually, they'd also have similar answers, not knowing where you were or you were locked in your room most of the time when Kitty would come to ask you for anything.

You felt guilty for avoiding your friends like that, even Minho didn't deserve that especially considering he'd even offered to help you.

With a sigh, you opened your books and tried to study at least until it was near time to go back to your dorms.

[ a few hours later ]

After a somewhat successful study session of you attempting to finish your Korea Lit assignment that'd been eating your brains quite literally as you felt a headache forming when you realized you didn't understand anything, you decided you had enough.

Groaning exhaustedly, you winded up your books and packed them, deciding it was time to just head back, frankly there'd been so much on your mind you were pretty sure that was probably one of the major reasons you didn't understand anything academic related.

Or you were just terrible at Korean Literature and really should have just stepped in your ego and crushed it when Minho offered to help you and gone to his tutoring lessons.

But noo you just had to have an epiphany that you really liked him, in a romantic way that same day he offered.

Deciding you deserved some kind of reward for tolerating and trying at least, you took a little detour to the grocery store that was along the way.

Purchasing a lychee moju moju along with some small snacks to eat, you quickly rushed to head back to campus before Kitty came back to your dorms from the library.

Memorizing her schedule so as to know when to avoid her became a part of your routine, a benefit was it was quite similar to the rest of them so you could also avoid them all at once. At least until you were ready.

Lost in your thoughts, you didn't even notice something in front of you until it was too late.

And when you took a step and a loud hiss followed that scared you so bad,you literally tripped on your own feet and fell straight to the hard concrete, face first.

Luckily you'd been able to divert your face sideways so to make sure there'd be less of an impact on your precious nose.

Now it was your turn to hiss as you groaned, rising on your hands to get up slowly.

The right side of your face was the one that had contact with the ground so it hurt like a fucking bitch when you tried to move.

As you rose up to your feet, you caressed the side of your injured face and winced when you felt something warm and wet.

Sighing exhaustedly when you indeed saw it was blood.

You're such a clumsy ass.

Words unknowingly flashed in your mind, words that a certain someone once told you and back then you were annoyed but now you felt that they really were right.

As much as it hurts your ego to admit that.

Suddenly you saw something small moving in the corner of your eye, the street being lit up only by street lights placed around five meters apart.

As you moved closer, you hoped this wasn't a grave mistake and you were not walking to your own death.

As you removed your phone from your left pocket to flash your flashlight because it had been in an area where the streetlight did not cover the range hence it was sort of dark.

You braced yourself for the worse,

Okay calm down, you can run for it and you'll save your—

Wait.

What?

You deadpanned once you saw what was hidden in the dark.

It was a cat.

A brown and black one and it was caressing its tail, hissing at you once you flashed your phone at it.

You connected the dots and sighed in relief, knowing it wasn't a murderer and it wasn't a trap; rather you had likely stepped on its tail when you didn't notice it in front of you due to its color being less visible in the dark spot.

A sense of guilt crept up on you when you thought about how you must have hurt it, even if it was unintentionally.

Deciding you'd help it, at least by giving it something to eat, you grabbed your grocery bag that sadly laid out splayed out.

Knowing you didn't have anything cat friendly to feed, you pointed at it as if talking to it.

"I'll be back! Stay here."

Turning around and making a second round trip to the grocery store, not even realizing it was nearing dangerously close to your curfew.

You didn't even notice the look of pure concern on the cashier's face, having forgotten your injuries both as a result of adrenaline basically numbing the pain and also you being in a hurry when you noted the time.

Surprisingly the cat was still in its spot, eyes closed and sitting with its head tilted who you knelt down to it.

You opened the can of tuna and your nose scrunched in disgust at the smell, but someone else was delighted as it leaned forward immediately.

Chuckling at the cat's eagerness, you placed it on the ground and it dived right in, devouring the tuna.

"You probably haven't eaten in a while huh?"

Gazing at the cat with sympathy and speaking as if the cat would understand you, you sighed sadly.

As one would when seeing a cat, you moved your hand to pet its head, but just as you were about to touch it, it decided you were the enemy.

Hissing at you, you didn't even get to avoid it when it swiped it's paw at your hand.

It wasn't too deep, but it definitely left a mark and oh it also definitely hurt, burned as well.

You pulled your hand, seeing the scratch mark deep enough to draw blood and once again groaned in pain.

The swipe was right on your fingers, moving across from your index to your pinky.

And it was beginning to bleed fast.

"Wow so you definitely aren't fond of physical affection." Wincing in pain as now it began to burn even more, you moved behind, pushing the can with your uninjured hand.

"Fine fine I'll leave you be." You told it gently, noticing it had retreated behind.

You got up while pressing your palm to the scratched fingers, making sure it wouldn't just began bleeding badly out of nowhere.

Shit I probably don't even have a first aid kit.

Today could not get any worse.

And you probably jinxed that as you looked the wristwatch in your left hand for the time.

8:45 pm

A whole twenty minutes passed curfew.

Fuck, you were so screwed now.

You facepalmed yourself only to almost scream in pain as you accidentally hit the right side of your injured forehead.

Great I probably look like I got beat up.

You began walking as fast as you could, your bag seeming heavier as you'd stuff everything including your grocery into it.

Please please please let the advisor not be there right now for checking.

As you reached the gates, you sighed in relief seeing they were still open but slowed down to see if there were any guards around.

It felt like you were suddenly thrown into a secret mission, one to avoid getting caught and possibly getting a suspension for being out so late.

Your wound had stopped bleeding profusely when you'd pulled the sleeve of your sweater over it, engulfing your hand completely.

It pained you to ruin that sweater but you could just buy a new one, hopefully.

Hiding behind a streetlight that was a few meters away from the gatez you scanned your surroundings ahead.

You could almost hear the James Bond theme music playing in your head.

You didn't spot any guards around and the gate was open, so you did the one thing only a true spy could possibly dare to do.

Make a run for it.

Ducking your head down and using the sleeve of your sweater to cover your face, you ran as fast as you could inside, trying to make as minimal noise as you could.

That was not the case when the grovel beneath crunched as you made a run for it and you cussed at yourself internally, praying no one was around.

Lucky for you, your dorm was nearer to the entrance and you felt like bursting out in tears of joy when you neared the building.

Running up the steps, you paid no mind to anyone around you.

"Wait, is anyone still out?! It's almost nine come on guys!"

Eyes widening when you realized you made a grave mistake assuming no one was in the hallways, you turned the opposite direction of your room as footsteps began nearing.

Shit, I need to hide.

Being in this crisis was possibly the worst rotten cherry on top of your nightmarish sundae.

Suddenly, you registered this wasn't your hallway, heck you'd entered the wrong building in a moment of stupidity.

This was the boys dorm building when you noticed the familiar numbers.

Wait a minute.

Your eyes scanned for a number you'd seen countless times by now as you slowly but quickly moved ahead. The footsteps had gotten slow and you knew Alex was in the other hallway, probably looking for who was around.

Grinning when the familiar number was on the door, you didn't think much and just knocked harshly.

"Q! It's Y/N, I'll explain everything but please I'll get caught if you don't open right now!"

Whispering harshly into the door in a panicky tone, you knocked rapidly making sure it wasn't too loud.

You were sure your heart almost dropped out of your chest when you heard the footsteps approaching your direction again.

Your hand dropped to your side as you looked in the direction of Alex heading and you didn't even realize the door had already opened.

You almost yelped so loudly when you felt a tug on your arm pulling you inside. The grip on your arm was strong enough to just drag you inside and you closed your eyes out of fear.

You were pinned behind the door, your back pressing into it as a large hand covered your hand to prevent the yelp out of your mouth. The person's other hand was on your waist to prevent you from falling straight to the ground.

You listened closely to the footsteps and sighed in temporary relief when they passed the dorm.

Only now did you grimace in pain,the hand on your mouth unknowingly hurting the injuries on your face,you reached your hand to tug it out of your face.

The person immediately backed away the moment you grimaced, it was so quick as if they'd been burnt by you. You almost fell over as you'd lean your entire weight on them.

"What the actual fuck happened to you?"

A familiar voice asked in both astonishment and even a hint of anger.

Your eyes were still shut, collecting yourself before you opened them as you relaxed briefly.

You had to blink twice when you noticed who was in front of you.

"Oh…it's you." You murmured, looking anywhere else but at Minho the moment you perceived it was him the whole time.

He scanned your entire face, obviously noticing the blood as well as the bruise, as his eyes lowered, he also saw the blood on your sweater sleeve, your hand now free and the visible marks bleeding once again from being exposed to sudden movement.

When he first heard you, he'd been laying on the couch scrolling on his phone, bored because Q had chosen to spend the night at Florian's, having the place to himself for tonight.

He swore he felt his heart drop when he heard you panicking tone on the other side and didn't even care if it was the first time he'd seen in two weeks of nothing, he pulled you in and when he heard you almost yell, he just placed his palm to shut you up as he heard the footsteps pass by.

He didn't mean to scare you but at the moment, all he could really think about was who even or what even happened to you.

"Who did this to you?" His tone seemed aggressive as he questioned in a deeper voice than usual. Well usual was also deep but it was something you got used to.

You'd become frozen the moment he spoke, not knowing what to say, a little embarrassed at how you ended up in this situation. He stepped forward, straightening up instinctively in alarm.

His eyebrows furrowed in question as he pushed his tongue to the side, lowering his head to your level, now near eye level with you, your eyes following his every movement.

You tried not to flinch too harshly when he grazed his fingertips on your cheek and lip, where you'd gotten hurt as well as the place near you eye and eyebrow.

"Uh, so like you see, it looks worse than what actually happened so really it isn't too big of a deal—"

Stepping back a bit, he looked at you ridiculously

"Not too big of a deal ?!" He questioned as if daring you to say it again,

"You must be kidding me right now." He laughed humorlessly as he ran his hand through his hair and you tried not to stare like an idiot.

And as cliche as it could be getting, you felt light headed as you tried to keep your balance. Blinking harshly to keep your eyes open, you almost fell forward when you took a step but this time Minho was able to catch you in time.

"Hey, hey, don't faint on me right now okay? Let's just get you seated first."

You leaned your weight on him as he held you with one arm, he'd move beside you to make you comfortable as he slowly walked you to the couch. Before he laid you down, he removed your bag from your shoulders and put it aside, to make sure you'd be able to lay more properly.

You sighed in both relief and exhaustion when you finally sat down.

"Wait I'll be back."

He recalled the first aid kit he had in his drawer and went to get it as soon as he could.

You shut your eyes, tiredness overwhelming you, not only from the adrenaline high getting over but also from the mental exhaustion that'd you'd been having since the whole mess.

You opened your eyes when you felt a weight beside you, Minho sitting down with a first aid kit in his hand.

He opened it to remove a bottle of hydrogen peroxide that made you scrunch your nose a little in disgust at the color and some cotton pads, band-aids, and a roll of bandage.

You noticed they were hello kitty ones, the same ones you used and that thought made you smile even for a brief moment.

"You really got this ones too?" You asked softly and Minho turned to look at you, looking at the band aids in awe and snorted at your expression.

"You are here, almost on the verge of passing out but you are questioning whether I have the same hello kitty band aids you have? And to answer your question, yes."

"Gotta keep those priorities in check."

He rolled his eyes as he soaked the cotton pad with the hydrogen peroxide, the familiar deep brown color showing.

He gently took your hand and began to clean the wound.

Hissing loudly, you sat more straight about to pull away but he still kept the grip on your arm.

"It's okay, it'll hurt a bit, just hold on for a sec." Minho gently said to you as he focused on cleaning it, laying your hand on your lap and taking another cotton pad when the current one got used enough.

As much as you wanted to cuss out loud, you decided to put your focus elsewhere, choosing his face was the perfect place for that.

His eyes were as soft as his touch, you didn't think he'd be this gentle with you but here you were, him tending to your wounds, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration as his jaw was unknowingly clenched in the same focus.

"Sorry." You blurted out of nowhere, the guilt from everything piling up one by one, from the fact that you'd been ignoring him for two weeks only to show up after and him having to tend to your injuries when he could have just kicked you out.

He briefly made eye contact with you, wiping the now cleaner cuts with a dry cotton pad, and opening the kit again to remove a tube of antibiotic ointment.

The coolness of the ointment made you almost breath out of relief but you were still tense because Minho hadn't said anything yet.

"I get that you must be…angry with me. It's reasonable but I have my own reasons, I think they are pretty valid if you want to hear them out?"

You finished, your throat closing up afterwards and you felt like you'd pass out from how fast your heart began beating.

"How did you get injured like this? First, tell me that." He finally spoke, wrapping a sterile white bandage around your fingers after the ointment.

He carefully finished wrapping and tied a knot, making sure it wasn't too tight as he looked at you questionably, to which you shook your head.

"It's stupid. Really."

"I know you're stupid but—"

"I fell." You let the cat out of the bag and diverted your gaze, his movements pausing to process your words as if he heard wrong.

"Don't lie to me. Did someone bully you and beat you up—"

"I was coming to the dorms from my "study" session at the cafe that's like twenty minutes away from here, when I went to the grocery store for…stuff. And after I got what I needed, I was heading here and I was uh…preoccupied with something that I didn't see what was infront of me, so I stepped on it and then I tripped on my own feet and next thing I know my face was kissing the ground, then when—"

"You're telling me this was all because of your clu—"

"LET ME FINISH!"

Minho shut up after that and pressed his lips into a thin line while you continued,

"As I was saying, I couldn't see what it was and it already hid in the dark when I flashed my phone's light, I saw it was a cat and then I felt bad for stepping on its tail, I went back and got some tuna for it at the store, I gave it to her but I think she was still upset so when I went to pet her, she scratched my fingers, which is why my hand is also injured."

"And oh, I ended up here by accident because I entered your dorm building while I was making a run for it and realized it too late, I didn't want to get caught so I thought of just asking whether I could hide in your dorm until the advisors stopped their rounds."

You breathed out heavily, your chest hurting from the lack of oxygen for saying all that in one go but you didn't want to embarrass yourself by thinking too much about it and just wanted to let it all out in go.

You moved your gaze back to Minho's when you noticed how quiet he'd gotten afterwards, having been looking somewhere else when telling how you got in this situation.

Narrowing your eyes at him suspiciously, he averted his gaze elsewhere while you scanned his expression.

"You can laugh if you want to." Sighing you finally said and that seemed to work as Minho laughed at you.

You deadpanned him as he spoke in between his laughing "You are really the biggest klutz I have known, I mean all this all because of a cat?!"

Rolling your eyes, you lightly frowned and Minho noticing this, began calming down,

"Okay, Okay I won't laugh, I'm sorry." He breathed out as he cleared his throat and looked at you, biting his bottom lip to stop the giggles as he saw your expressions.

"Are we done here? I have to go back to my room too—"

"I haven't even treated your face yet!"

Now it was your turn to shut up and you slightly pouted at his scolding tone,

"As hilarious as your little story is…you need to be more careful. Like this is kinda crazy to get hurt like this by just falling."

"Okay, mum got it." You mocked him and he glared at you, pressing the soaked cotton pad onto your cheek out of nowhere.

"YOU BITCH! WARN SOMEONE NEXT TIME—"

"You should have already known—"

"You KNOW WHAT FUCK YO—"

He ignored you as he continued to clean up your wound, your words being replaced with quite literally having to bite your tongue to control the hisses of pain.

"Now, now please shut up and stay still."

You wanted to cuss at him again, claiming this was abuse but the look on his face challenged you to dare to pipe up again.

Instead, you just sighed in exhaustion, letting him finish his unnecessary kind act that was again questionable if it were out of his supposed kindness or convenience.

"Now there, all done." He placed the final hello kitty band-aid on your lip corner gently and you wished you could smile but that felt like a terrible idea as you remembered that even lifting up the corner of your right side made a sharp pain shoot up your lip.

"Thank you…I guess." You murmured softly to which a smug smile formed on his face,

"I didn't hear you, could you please repeat that for me?" He pretended to be in thought of what you said when he clearly heard you due to your proximity.

You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms and swallowing down the bitter taste on your tongue, having to put your ego down a little at this point.

"I said."

"Thank you for this. Thank you for…helping me. Even when you didn't need to."

Even if you couldn't see it because you'd been looking elsewhere but him, he had a tiny smile on his face as he watched you.

"Anytime clumsy idiot, if it weren't me to handle your clumsy ass, then who?"

It was probably meant as a joke, maybe a taunt even but your heart took it in a different way as you felt the familiar butterflies flutter.

"Minho seriously stop it, you shouldn't just say things like that."

He'd begun winding up the first aid kit and the extra stuff that was there, when he heard you say that under your breath, which made him stop his task.

"Things like what?" He faced you now, his body in your direction as you froze up.

"Oh you know what I mean…stuff that can be taken into….a different context by…people." You awkwardly said, trying to dodge your way out of what you actually meant.

"Do enlightenment me, you know about the context of this." He leaned in closer to you, a smirk forming on his face and you frowned, gulping thinking of what to say next.

"Uhm…well." Biting your lip in thought, the floor seemed like a better place to focus at.

Minho's eyes softened at that, deciding he'd rather not tease you more.

"You know, I still don't get why you have been ignoring me for two weeks. Actually, everyone for two weeks." He blurted out what he really wanted to ask since he'd been able to talk to you properly after this long.

"At first, I thought that maybe you were busy but after the first 4-5 days, I figured you'd been purposefully avoiding me." He said as he looked down and you could feel the guilt creeping up all over again.

"Look. What is something I did?" He asked you with a tone of regret looking at you to see if your expression would reveal anything and as you held eye contact, what made you snap was the sincerity in them.

"No! No, it's not you…well, it is about you but not because of you? It's me though! I am the problem here." Staring at him got too much so you just decided to stand up and avoid looking at him when you spoke. The proximity was also getting to your head and the musky yet expensive smell he wore was suddenly so strong it made you dizzy.

You began racing back and forth in that small space, as you thought of how to explain and you didn't even grasp you'd been rambling the whole time, your hands moving in gestures as actions to your words.

"I sort of just noticed something about me and it got a lot since I never really felt like that way and it's crazy because it is also unexpected—"

Minho stood up and stood in front of you, holding you by your shoulders, genuine concern on his face when he scanned your distressed look.

"Okay calm down, if you don't feel comfortable explaining anything right now, you can just rest and you can tell when you do feel like it."

"No."

He raised an eyebrow at your answer and you continued,

"I think… I want to say it."

He dropped his hands from your shoulders, letting them rest by his sides as you looked into his eyes.

For that moment, you just now perceived how close you were to him, taking in how handsome he truly was, you never admitted it but it was very obvious.

Your eyes momentarily paused on his lips, maybe looking at them for longer than one should and before you could trail your gaze lower to the dip of his throat in his hoodie, you paused at his Adam's apple that bobbed up and down as he swallowed.

Even though he'd been the one who got close to you like this, Minho still felt a little nervous when you looked up at him like the way you were right now.

"Turn around." You ordered before you could even think about it and confusion flooded his face.

"I won't be able to say it while looking at you so please."

Pausing for a brief second, he turned on his heel now facing the greenish bluish wall.

"You know if you want to confess to a murder, you don't need to be afraid, I'll help you hide—"

"I think I'm in love with you." You exclaimed, ignoring his words as you stared at the back of his head.

He was not that taller than you, just by a few inches or so but it was just the right height.

Immediately, you noticed him shut up and tense up as his shoulders straightened.

"I personally never thought it'd be you out of all people but fuck, it's not like your heart lets you decide who you should fall in love with." You tugged at the uninjured hand's sleeve while you used your other to brush your hair behind your ear.

"As cheesy as that sounds. I don't know when it happened or how it happened but I do know when I knew. It was when you bought food for me when I was upset and it was everything I liked. Or maybe it was when despite being cold yourself, you'd offered me your sweater and gosh you just know how to pull at one's strings don't you?"

"I'll admit though, I was annoyed by you and your…attitude and I still will be but it's just that, crazily enough I think that's just one of the reasons I fell for you."

"You're many things Minho, stupid, annoying as fuck, bitchy at times as well, but you're also sweet and caring when you want to be. And now I am just rambling at this point so I'll just shut up."

You pressed your lips into a thin line, the ground a great place to put your attention, your cheeks warming up and you swore you felt like you'd faint then and there.

It was like the atmosphere took a change after your confession and momentary rant. A lingering silence that felt loud and you really didn't know what to think.

Can I die at this moment right now? Dropping dead sounds so tempting.

"..."

"...can I uh…turn around now? To you know…talk?" He asked, scratching the back of his neck nervously your eyes snapped to him, widening when you recalled that he was still facing the wall.

Groaning at the fact that you forgot he was not facing you, you coughed out awkwardly,

"Yeah! Of course…you can."

You held your breath as you waited for him to turn around, and when he did, you couldn’t even look at him.

Minho honestly didn’t know what to think, say or do.

Because what can you say after the person you’ve been pining over since the past few months suddenly confessed their apparently reciprocated love to you?

He thought he’d been doing a decent job hiding his feelings so he doesn’t need to face the brutal rejection fear we all get when we have a crush on our supposed ‘enemy’. But it got harder for him as time went by, and soon enough he found himself completely head over heels for you.

Taking his obvious silence as your answer, your heart grew heavier at the lack of response and you spoke up, breaking the blanket of quietness.

“I suppose you don’t feel the same way so I should probably just go anyways it’s getting late, just…forget I said anything-”

You began to slowly take a few steps back, making sure you wouldn’t fall and injure yourself again,

Minho’s head sharply turned towards you as his eyes widened in alarm, “Wait! You didn’t even let me say anything!”

Pausing in your steps before you could swiftly turn for the door and exit as quick as you could, now a sheepish look on your face as you saw his slightly annoyed and alarmed look.

“Well, I just assumed your silence was an answer?”

He crossed his arms now a few feet away from you as he was already making his way towards you.

“There you go again with you and your assumptions! You really should let someone speak at least.” He sighed rubbing the gap between his brows with his index finger.

He moved closer to you, now only an arm's length away from you, “Look at me, please?”

You had to raise your head a little to look him in the eyes and you felt like you could get lost in them, one hand was on your side, clenched in a fist out of nervousness.

“Who said I didn’t feel the same?” He asked so casually as if asking for your name and you could only gape at him at the implications.

“Because I definitely know that,” He gulped as he looked down at you, feeling like his heart might just jump out of his chest at what he was about to say.

“I am in love with you, maybe a little or by a whole lot. A whole lot I swear I can feel my heart jump just at your presence. I didn’t say anything because honestly, I thought this was another dream I was having, I had to pinch myself to make sure. But I do feel the same, possibly more than you ever will.”

Your jaw might as well have been on the floor at his unexpected confession, frankly, yours was also something you didn’t think you were going to say, but you said it because you couldn’t keep it in you anymore.

“Hold on, what do you mean by another dream?” You narrowed your eyes at him suspiciously, deciding to mess around with him but in reality, you were soaring and your heart probably long leaped out of you in pure euphoria.

“Out of all that, you picked up on only that?!? Did you just- just completely dismiss the fact that I am in love with you as well?!”

Giggling at his expression, you couldn’t contain your happiness as he fell for your joke and once he realised that he glared at you half-heartedly,

“You think you’re so funny huh? Do you even know how hard it was for me to say that? I almost fainted for fucks sake!”

You laughed even more at that, having to hold your stomach with one hand as you leaned forward and at the sound of your laughter, his own smile he’d been trying to control showed as he rolled his eyes at you, shaking his head.

“You seriously know how to make a guy have a heart attack.”

At this, you looked up at him stepping even closer as you bopped his nose,

“But you literally just confessed to being in love with me and you can’t take back what you said now.”

A comical squeak arose from you as he wrapped his arms around your waist out of nowhere pulling you closer, gently moving your injured hand on his shoulder to make sure you didn’t get hurt and you moved your other one around his neck.

It wasn’t like he’d never touched you, but still, the spark of electricity shooting through your entire body didn’t change one bit and it felt the same for him as the warmth radiating from you seemed to engulf him as well.

Staring at him, your eyes trailed to his lips and you moved closer, wanting to just,

Before you could even close the distance, you felt a finger on your lips and heard him whisper to you,

“No, no, you can’t kiss me right now, as much as I want to, you first need to let this heal.” He tenderly poked the right corner of your lip where you’d forgotten you were hurt at the moment.

Pouting slightly at that, Minho chuckled and before you could whine, he swiftly leaned forward and pecked your lips, lingering for a second before pulling back,

“That’s all you get, for now.” Sighing you just nodded, knowing it was for the best.

“You know you still have to make up to me for ignoring me for two weeks, I mean not only me but I’m sure Kitty’s ready to kick your ass as well, I heard she was planning to threaten to burn your giraffe socks if you didn’t talk to her.”

Suddenly a realisation hit you when you remembered something,

“IS THAT WHY I CAN’T FIND THEM SINCE THE PAST TWO DAYS?!?”

“...I suppose she’s already executed her plan.”

all written works as well as images and edits (unless credited) belong to pri. do not plagiarise, repost, re-edit or claim as yours. pics mostly found on pinterest.

links : main navigation !

2K notes · View notes

kazutora-lover · 2 years

Text

Title: Defeated (Part 1)

boss!Wakasa x secretary!fem!reader || Part 2

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Genre: fluff, angst, 'friends' -» enemies -» lovers (kinda-ish?)

Summary: working in your boss's gym as his secretary, just why did he always have to put up a fight?

Warnings: mentions of food and eating, cursing, Waka is stupid and mean (for now, he has his reasons - please bear with me here) :(

Notes: 1st gen Black Dragons are part of the story hehe and of course, everyone is alive because I'm saying so ~

Word count: 2.2k +

a/n: I didn't even plan for it to have multiple parts but it felt kinda appropriate to stop it here haha, gotta keep y'all on your toes. Also, why am I doing this to myself? She said she's simping for him and what does she do? Inflict pain on her already shredded and shattered heart lmao. The angst just 'pspspsed' at me and I couldn't escape its grasp.. Anyways, I hope you guys will like it. I was kinda anxious about posting this ngl lol.

a/n pt.2: I apologize for any grammatical errors, English is not my native language. I didn't entirely proofread it yet either, will do that later :).

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..... Friday.....

Friday nights, usually loved by everyone due to the simple fact of being able to rest as soon as one comes home, not the slightest worry about having to get up early the very next morning.

It's easy to assume that you loved Fridays too, right?

Well, you did love them but now that your boss decided to act like a prick, you started to hate them with a burning passion.

You don't even remember how or when it happened, Wakasa just started to act completely different around you. One day really can make a huge difference, huh?

Laying in your bed after another energy draining day at the gym, you got lost in your thoughts. Your boss, who used to be nice to you, understood when you felt sick and didn't come to work or checked in later than usual, the person who made sure to bring you food once he bought himself something, the same man who shared his coffee with you, started to act completely different overnight.

Said man didn't spare you a single glance except for when you really needed something from him and even then, he tried to keep it short and told you to only talk to him if it's work related.

He made you wonder if you did or said something wrong. If you didn't know any better, you would think the two of you have never been friends to begin with.

That's right, you've been friends with him for years and even befriended his own friend group, you guys grew closer and closer and did so many things together just for the man who brought you joy to throw it all away out of nowhere?

Tomorrow would be another one of those Friday's, another one where you wouldn't be able to relax on the weekend because Wakasa decided to keep you more than busy, making you stay right past the ungodly hours.

The man you once considered a very close friend didn't even seem to care about the fact that your mutual friends were just as confused as you were. He didn't tell them his reasons and even went as far as slowly distancing himself from them too.

You remember your most recent conversation with Shinichiro and Benkei - "Y/n, did you find out what's going on with Waka? He has been quite distant with us lately" Shin had questioned you.

"If only I knew, it's as if he changed personalities, he won't even look at me properly when I talk to him and he's become unusually harsh at work"

Benkei hummed at what you had said and added "I also came to notice that and everytime I would ask him what's going on, he would brush me off and tell me to mind my own business and that I should concentrate on training the others"

It was weird and you would lie if you said that it didn't hurt you but you had to be professional at work, this is not about your seemingly private problems.

Were you able to catch up on some sleep? You wished you did, but your never ending thoughts kept you awake and anxious. It didn't feel good and you wished to find out what bothered him.

When you arrived, Wakasa was already there. He looked distressed and tired but his attitude changed the second he saw you enter the gym.

"L/n, I don't know if I haven't made myself clear enough but didn't I tell you yesterday to finish the paperwork on time? I gave you enough time didn't I?"

He doesn't even feel the need for a simple 'good morning', huh? "I finished everything in the evening and put it on your desk Waka, didn't you see it?"

Looking at the boxing gloves embracing his hands, he retorted "First of all, since when do we call each other by our first names at work? And second of all, I texted you to finish the other pile on my desk, you didn't do that, did you? I need you to stay longer today, I need everything finished by 11pm!"

You couldn't believe your ears, you were supposed to meet up with Shin, Takeomi and Benkei for dinner later "Waka, we are supposed to meet up with the boys today, can I by any chance finish this tomorrow when the gym isn't open?"

It didn't even take you one second to see that he wasn't pleased with your answer, the glare he sent your way proving your point. "Do your work properly or I'll have to find someone better than you, do you understand? One more thing, try to call me by my first name again and I'll have you suspended"

With that he left you alone, leaving you and the huge pile of paperwork behind. You don't even understand where all of this came from, did he collect and hide them from you to set you up? This doesn't make any sense.

You've been sat in your office for hours, completely forgetting about the time. You felt so tired, ready to fall asleep but you weren't even halfway done. Sighing frustratedly, you ran your fingers through your hair and decided to take a look at your phone. '4 unread messages from The BD Squad' - your groupchat with your lovely friends.

Shin

"It's past 9pm Y/n, where are you?"

Benkei

"We were supposed to meet at 7pm, even Waka arrived on time, haven't you been at work together? Where are you?"

Takeomi

"Weren't you the one who was all excited to try the new restaurant? Didn't think you'd ditch us"

Benkei

"Do you want us to bring you something? Are you at home?"

You sighed again, it was past 10pm by now and you didn't seem to make it home any time soon. The frustration you felt made you want to scream and then cry. How come Waka met up with them after distancing himself in the first place? Did he want to keep you away from them? Was he fed up with the fact that you were around all the time?

Right when you wanted to text them back, saying that you were busy, Shin called you.

You picked up the phone and were greeted by his voice which was laced with worry "Hey Y/n? You didn't answer us so I decided to call you, are you okay? We're worried about you"

If you didn't feel like crying before, you sure felt like it now "Ah yes I'm okay, I just got some paperwork to finish. I'm so sorry for ditching you guys! I really didn't mean to, I just forgot about the time and then-"

Shin had heard enough and decided to interrupt you for good "Did you eat something yet? Are you hungry? We can come over to your place and bring you some food" he sounded hopeful, knowing fully well that you've been neglecting your needs once again.

"I'm okay, really! I'm still at the gym so there's no need to go over to my place. Again, I'm really sorry that I didn't inform you guys earlier - I'll make it up to you!"

Shin clicked his tongue in response and that's when you heard a second voice in the background "Stop distracting her, she has work to finish". It was Waka's voice, of course it was.

After a small pause on his side Shinichiro spoke up once again, his voice soft "Stay there and don't run away, we'll come and take you home" and with that he hung up abruptly.

It was strange but you couldn't allow yourself to get distracted now, Wakasa had reminded you once again how 'important' it is to finish this.

You must've fallen asleep because when you woke up, you weren't sitting at your office table anymore. You were lying on the sofa in your office with a thin blanket draped over your aching body. "What happened here" you asked yourself rather than anyone else but what you didn't expect was for you to receive an answer which made you shriek in surprise.

"So you're awake, sleepyhead?" It was Shin, accompanied by Benkei. "What are you guys doing here?" You asked as your eyes were still heavy with sleep.

"I told you we would come over to take you home but when we arrived you were fast asleep so we decided to let you relax a little bit - why are you even here at such ungodly hours?"

You pondered a little bit until you decided that enough is enough "Wakasa made me work longer, this has been going on for weeks but today has been the first time he actually got mad at me. Earlier he scolded me how I shouldn't call him by his first name at work and if I did it again, he would get me suspended. When I asked him if I could finish the workload tomorrow because of our plans to meet up for dinner, he told me to do my work properly or he would find someone better than me".

The shock on the both of their faces was more than apparent and it quickly changed into disappointment. They weren't disappointed in you, not in the slightest, but rather in their friend whom they didn't seem to know any longer. Benkei looked at you with sympathy "You should quit - don't get me wrong, I love that you work with us but you shouldn't let him treat you like that".

"Yeah, you should show him what he's going to miss out on - might as well steal you from him and get you to work at my shop. He doesn't seem to be able to show you the appreciation you deserve"

You knew they were right, you knew it but it hurt to even think about. What happened for Wakasa to hate you so much? Did he find out how you feel about him? Is that the reason he's doing all of this? Are you at fault that he's keeping his distance from his friends? You were so deep in thought that you didn't even notice that Shin had moved to embrace you in his arms.

He felt so warm and safe that you let it all out before you could stop yourself. You told them everything, every single thing that has been making your heart ache and they listened intently, not daring to interrupt you in the slightest.

About two hours later you had found yourself at home, well saturated due to Benkei and Shin who threatened to feed you themselves if you didn't eat what they brought you and freshly showered, ready to fall asleep in your cozy bed.

The next morning was pure comfort, it was the first time in a while that you didn't wake up to your ridiculously loud alarm but the warm rays of sunshine glowing on your face instead.

Checking your phone, you saw that you've got 2 messages from Shin but not a single one of your old boss, Wakasa. He really didn't care anymore, did he?

You closed your eyes for a second and recalled the events of yesterday evening - you had told Shinichiro and Benkei everything that has been going on and they got so mad on your behalf that they started to write your letter of resignation themselves.

When they were done, they made you read it and asked for your approval to put it on Wakasa's table, his office was next to yours after all.

There was no way he didn't see or read it yet, both men made sure to write the letters as bold as possible. But that's okay, you thought, it's not like you could force him to interact with you any longer, you parted ways and now you're nothing but strangers again.

The once lovely stranger who took you and your heart for granted. The stranger who once called himself your friend, who made you feel strange things for him. Versatile, is what you would call the feelings you harbored for him, such strong but strange strange feelings bubbling up in your heart.

With chaos in mind you got up and made your way to your bathroom, wanting to get fresh and ready for the day. What you didn't expect was for your doorbell to ring - someone really has one kind of a timing. You didn't even expect anyone nor had you made any plans so who was it?

Whoever was at the door definitely owed you one, they interrupted your chance of emptying your bladder. Right as you made your way to the front door to look through the peephole it had knocked two times, effectively making you jump.

Finally checking who it was, you spotted Shinichiro with a bag in his hand. With the corners of your mouth betraying you, you invited him in, your smile surprisingly bright "I didn't expect to see you, what brings you here?"

Looking at you comically, he retorted "My motorcycle, what else?" You watched him intently, judging him for what he just said but couldn't stop the giggles escaping your lips.

"Did you just fall for me?"

You scoffed, your smile not fading in the slightest "Keep dreaming pretty boy, I was laughing at you". Said man feigned a shocked expression and gave you a light push into the direction of your bathroom, shaking the bag in his other hand in the process "Get ready sleepyhead, your personal delivery man brought lunch and he wants to eat it warm".

.......to be continued

#tokyo revengers #black dragons #wakasa imaushi #shinichiro sano #akashi takeomi #arashi keizou #wakasa imaushi x reader #wakasa x reader #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers fluff #tokyo revengers angst #kazutora-lover

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pisspope · 1 year

Text

okay birthday hcs part 2 but now its reiners bday instead still modern!au because otherwise shit would be anachronistic honestly all credit to @mercifulmudkip because i was just gonna let my other hcs sit on their own but. truly they lit a fire under my ass. i guess cw for a little bit of angst but it's pretty negligible

so fr fr reiner does Not celebrate his birthday unprompted. in canon he straight up wants to [demonetize] himself so even in the modern day he's not into it

last birthday he probably really enjoyed was as a kid. it was tmnt themed and he, bert, annie, and marcel were each a turtle. zeke, their babysitter, was splinter. porco was practically still in diapers but was already antagonizing them as shredder. reiner has fond memories of this but certainly sees it as all in the past

but after he made your birthday so special u are on a MISSION. rounding up the whole gang to make this truly The Number One Birthday Party

i wanna say surprise party because otherwise he would drag his feet about having a celebration so? he certainly can't know about it beforehand

u tell him on the weekend that ur going over to pieck and porcos shared teeny tiny house to celebrate piecks birthday (theyre literally 4 days apart) and honestly thats not really a lie! he just doesnt know its a Joint birthday party

pieck is also 100% in on the surprise even though its her party too. helps porco set up streamers, blow up balloons, etc.

pieck, porco, and annie try to hang stuff from the ceiling but can't reach. bertholdt just walks up behind all three of them with some tape and sticks everything up in rapid succession. annie "you really need to invest in a stepladder." pieck "why would i get a stepladder when i can just ask bert to do it :)?"

falco and gabi were originally enlisted to help but when they found porcos nerf guns they were sent to the backyard

everyone had played with the idea of hiding behind couches, turning lights off, doing the whole "Surprise Party" thing, but eventually decided against it in case it sent poor reiner into a full blown panic attack

instead, its more subtle. when you hop into reiners front seat with two presents, u tell him that u found something at the store that you just couldn't resist. also technically not a lie!

when u pull up to the party, porco is sitting on the front step vaping or something. ring of pineapple smoke around his head. "hey its the birthday bo- I mean, fuck -- wasn't your birthday a couple days ago? haha, weird." nice save, pock

the party is small and intimate, but by no means quiet. pieck has put on some hyperpop to try to keep awake while annie is absolutely dominating bert in smash bros. they always bring it as a party game but no one wants to play with annie because she absolutely wipes the floor every time. reiner has never picked up a switch controller and has, in fact, just discovered that his work computer has minesweeper

after some mingling u all gather around the table for Birthday Dinner. reiner walks in the kitchen and sees two small cakes but thinks its just got something to do with falcos peanut allergy and shrugs it off

everyone sings happy birthday to pieck and after she blows out the candles gabi waves her hands and says "one! more! time!" reiner is all raised eyebrows and confused expression as porco brings out the second cake and places it in front of him at the table

my boy literally starts tearing up as everyone starts a rousing encore of the birthday song. looks at u, eyes shiny, KNOWS u had a hand in this. whispers a soft 'thank you' to u before he blows out the candles and makes his wish

when its time for presents he finally puts two and two together about u bringing two gifts in the car. can practically see the lightbulb above his head. holds the small package in his hands like its going to break apart or disappear. "you didn't have to get me anything. this is more than enough."

it's a little digital camera, nothing fancy, maybe two different modes for landscape shots and close-ups. but it's perfect.

he sets it up to charge in the kitchen while everyone is cleaning up, then meets back in the living room to hang out. gabi and falco have joined annie and bertholdts game, and pieck is fading fast on porcos shoulder while he scrolls on his phone

reiner sits down next to you on the couch, and is not slow to take you into his arms, head resting on top of yours. "You had a hand in this, didn't you?" his voice is resonant and deep, and u can feel the vibration where his neck touches the side of ur head. u nod and look up at him. "a little."

he kisses the top of ur head, breathes in the scent of u. "remind me to take a picture before we leave. i don't ever want to forget today."

he lines everyone up for a photo but has no clue how to set a timer or anything, so he ends up poking his head in at the last moment. ends up looking like absolute shit, out of focus with a big blond blur right on the side of the frame. porco cant stop laughing at it. "babys first selfie" he calls it

but reiner loves it. to him, that blurry picture is like a trophy or a treasure. hed make it his desktop background if he had any clue how

he takes a couple more pictures and decides to experiment more with it later. just enjoys the evening, the company, the feeling of your hand in his

and if gabi steals the camera and takes a candid photo of you two sharing a kiss, well… he'll find out eventually

#reiner braun #reiner x reader #reiner x y/n #cat thots #aot

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fieldofdaisiies · 1 year

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Hi omg I dont know wtf is wrong with me but I had a dream that feyre and azzy were a thing behind rhys's back and i just neeeeeeed someone to write this as either a smut fic or fluff fic cuz i would do no justice to this whatsoever. If its too weird i love it. Just like oof so much angst and forbidden love AHHHH. Im completely sober too.

Only if you have time tho

Hahahahah of course. I had no idea Feyzriel was a thing but here we go haha. Hope you like how it turned out.

Feyzriel | My Heart is Yours

type: fluff warning(s): allusions to sex, curse words word count: 802 words

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It had all happened after another flying lesson. And it had all happened so fast. One moment Feyre had tumbled, threatening to fall down to the ground. The next moment the spymaster had caught the High Lady in his strong arms.

Azriel had cradled her to his chest, held her tightly, inhaled her scent. Their gazes had locked, they had been breathing the same air, staring into each other's eyes. Their need had stretched out between the two of them. His scarred had been placed in her hair, holding her gently while lowering them to the ground.

The spymaster had carried his High Lady softly and carefully, before neither could stand the tension any longer.

It had been messy and wild, right on the forest ground. But their need and longing had been too strong, too much to shut it down. They had clawed at each other until enough clothes had been removed for them to come together.

Their mouths connected, their tongues wanting to taste the other’s. The sought each others company, yearning for each other's touch. They had been longing for so long, finally given the time and place to fulfill their deepest desire. It was ravishing and rough, teeth colliding, tongues fighting for dominance, skin moving against skin. Tow souls that had been yearning for the other finally connected when their two bodies came together on the ground of the large forest. On the ground that was covered in pebbles, leaves and pine needles. But neither had seemed to care.

Maybe the Cauldron had been wrong? Those soft touches here and there, the stolen glances couldn’t have been misinterpreted. Neither could have the kisses. Those short and quick stolen pecks they had shared when they had passed each other, when they had been out of sight. The two of them had always lived in fear of being discovered, but their feelings for each other had just been too strong. They had been terrified of what would happen if it had been revealed. They could not tell anyone, it would break the High Lord and break apart the whole Inner Circle–the Night Court.

There was something between the two of them, a connection, a need.

Never had they gone further than those kisses. Until that day. That day had changed everything. The longing had gotten too much, the longing to finally claim the other had been too strong. The shadowsinger wanted the High Lady and vice versa. The had questioned the Cauldron's decision a long time ago – it had simply been wrong.

What they were doing was also wrong. Azriel betrayed his brother, Feyre her mate.

Azriel was panting heavily when he rolled onto his side, off the High Lady and smacked a hand over his sweaty forehead.

"I am sorry," he breathed, his voice weak.

Feyre exhaled loudly, her back pressing into the pine needles and pebbles. She rolled onto her side and moved her hand over Azriel's chest, over his heart. "Don't apologise, Az. I am not innocent in this either."

"We fucked up," Azriel said, but placed his hand over his High Lady's. "What if Rhys finds out?"

"He won't find out. When I get home I will immediately bath and wash of your scent. Don't blame yourself, Azriel. We just followed our heart."

The spymaster closed his eyes, his scarred hand squeezing Feyre's when he inhaled a deep breath and turned his head to the side. He opened his eyes. The High Lady was already looking at him, her gaze filled with so much love and understanding. Azriel leaned over and kissed her nose. "We followed our hearts. And mine is fully yours."

"And mine yours, Azriel," Feyre breathed, tipped her head back and pecked the shadowsinger's lips. A beautiful and content smile appeared on Azriel's face when he took in his High Lady. Damp strands of hair curled around her beautiful face, a thin film of sweat coating her skin, her cheeks rosy, her lips bruised.

"Still I betrayed my brother. The one person that had always been there for me. That saved me back then."

Feyre's hand moved up Azriel's throat, to his jaw and she placed it on his cheek. "I know. We eventually have to tell him. Put the cards on the table, we cannot forever keep this a secret."

"It will break him, Wreck him," Azriel said and swallowed the lump in his throat.

"We cannot keep it a secret. It wouldn't be fair," Feyre argued and lay her brows in folds. Azriel dipped his chin and moved a hand over Feyre's. He brought her hand to his lips and kissed her palm.

"We come up with a good plan first and then tell him."

A small smiled appeared on the High Lady's face and she nodded. "Yes, we will do that."

#feyzriel #azriel #feyre archeron #acotar #acosf

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danpuff-ao3 · 1 year

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Hello! How about your favourite femslash pairing, please? Thank you!

You see...the thing is...I don't have one favorite anything so you'll have to forgive the LIST. I'll consider my favorite ships for my favorite characters and then try to pin down one for each, yeah? (Wow I am bad at this game haha.)

Hermione

Hermione/Ginny: friends to lovers with added angst from previous Hermione/Ron?? Even better if there's existing Ginny/Harry and Hermione/Ron for MEGA ANGST (and then everyone comes out and lives happily ever after.)

Hermione/Narcissa: age gap! Weird "Hermione becomes Draco's stepmum" drama. Sophisticated, posh Narcissa and outspoken brainiac Hermione finding true love!! Oh and Hermione becoming Minister and Narcissa living her dream of being Minister's wife. Super cute.

Hermione/Minerva: AGE GAP. Super smart, capable, strong women being badass and awesome together. Also, Hermione likes cats.

Hermione/Pansy: enemies to lovers! Starcrossed lovers. Also sorta opposites attract. Pansy seems more into fashion and dating and gossip, while Hermione cares more about social justice and knowledge and idk just different priorities. And they can sort of get the wrong idea about each other. Pansy can prove she's more than just a vapid little girl, and show Hermione the value in things like beauty. And what can be learned by being a bit nosy. And maybe put some party planning skills into hosting events for Hermione's various causes. Maybe Pansy seeing the light and making amends postwar. But also while in school?? Just the whole hate sex vibe. Or maybe forced proximity breaks down those walls?? Idk just so much potential.

Hermione/Lavender: similar to Pansmione in the whole "girly girl hooks up with bookworm" vibe. Also the idea of both being Ron's exes, haha! But idk something about showing a bit more grace and appreciation for hyper-feminine ladies and not turning out noses down at fashion and dating and other "girly" interests. And having those "not like other girls" girls learn to respect those things or at least not judge them so much. And also remembering they were both Gryffindors and super brave. Both fought in the war. Also I forget which book but there was a scene in a Care of Magical Creatures class where creatures were loose and Lavender was one of the ones helping rally them up while even her bestie Parvati was hiding in Hagrid's Hut? (Iirc.) Also Lavender's interest in "silly" things like Divination. And like imagine postwar Lavender lives but is scarred, and Hermione is a bit impatient with her vanity but comes to be more compassionate and understanding and helping Lavender regain her confidence. And idk just Hermione the know-it-all having to learn more from others and be more open minded and let go of her preconceived notions and initial judgments.

Hermione/Fleur: okay this is the winner for me. I can't get past the idea of them bickering and having formed Opinions about each other that get challenged. The idea of them learning so much from each other and coming to respect and admire one another. And realizing the other is super strong and capable and intelligent and independent and loyal and brave as heck. Shared values!! Oh and the idea of them coming together over challenging archaic laws about magical creatures and beings!!!!

Ginny

Ginny/Hermione: [see above]

Ginny/Hooch: not enough of it but c'mon, age gap!! Two athletic ladies!! Bonding over Quidditch! I dig it. They're both pretty badass and I don't see either putting up with bs from anyone, let alone each other. Hooch might underestimate Ginny due to her age but Ginny comes into her own and proves her worth and earns Hooch's respect!!

Ginny/Gwenog: another rare pair fantasy that I need more of!!!! Again, two athletic ladies. Are they teammates, or opponents on the pitch?? Either way, I'm into it. But because there's so little of it, I still think my favorite for Ginny is:

Ginny/Luna: they're just so sweet and adorable. All the time spent together, working together, in Dumbledore's Army during that last year. And, because I'm astrology nerd, the fiery Leonine energy of Ginny and the airy Aquarian energy of Luna is such a perfect match!! (Also Leo and Aquarius are oppositions which makes it even more fun but let me not delve too deep into my astrology rabbit hole.) But it's how much of those respective energies I see in both of them and how it works together that sells me! Fire is spirit and zest and passion! Air is sociability and learning! Luna with her head in the clouds, so curious and creative! Ginny so adventurous and protective. They're both so self-assured and independent they could have their own separate lives but also share a life together that is fulfilling and peaceful and lovely for them both. Ginny can travel for Quidditch and Luna can travel for her creatures. And I bet Ginny likes the travel and exploration enough to join Luna when the season is over. And I'm sure Luna can get work done in whatever place Ginny has games in!! Idk they just work so well together.

Luna

Luna/Cho: Ravenclaws unite!! Idk there's something sweet about it. Pretty, popular Cho and the kooky "weird" girl?? Cho's really nice and patient and probably can't see past Luna's zaniness right away, but eventually she does. They just seem like a really cute, sweet pair.

Luna/Hermione: such an almost opposites attract sorta thing. They're both clearly brave. Both appreciate knowledge. Luna's curious and creative and...yeah, a bit kooky! She's independent, self-assured, confident, compassionate, open-minded. Hermione's a bit too strict and judgmental and by the book. Luna with her head in the clouds is probably a bit much for Hermione, but I feel like they could learn from each other and be so fun together. Hermione learning to loosen up and be more open-minded herself. And if she doesn't ever believe in all the same things Luna does, learning to respect them and find the worth in them. Seeing what she can take from what Luna shows her. Luna showing Hermione how to let loose and have fun. Hermione keeping things structured and stable in their lives together. Learning and growing together and challenging each other's way of thinking!

Luna/Ginny: but yeah, this one still wins. See above in the Ginny section!

TL;DR apparently Fleurmione and Linny, but what was I supposed to do?? Not sing the praises of other femslash ships I love????

Oh wait, it would be remiss of me to not also mention:

Lily/Alice:?? Idk much about Alice, but could be cute, but mostly I'm obsessed with Harry and Neville growing up as BROTHERS. I cry how adorable.

Lily/Narcissa: okay but how about this so that Harry and Draco can grow up as brothers?? Also the drama potential of pureblood Narcissa and Muggleborn Lily. All the angst of the war. The temptation if they're both married at the time. Lily showing Narcissa that there's more to life and how colorful and vibrant her world can be outside of the cold, dark, restrictive walls of her upbringing.

....I love femslash, okay?

#asked & answered #femslash faves #danpuff stuff #danni talks too much okay #i can't help it i am very passionate #wlw wonders #spoiler: the answers are fleurmione & linny

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sparxwrites · 2 years

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Sort of angst warning- OBSESSED with how the editing between Scar’s and Grian’s POV of DL (at least to me) changes the tone between the two. From Grian’s POV, Scar has been disinterested in his soulmate from the start, refusing to prioritize their safety and is using the jellies as an excuse while Grian is working to keep them both alive. Scar obviously doesn’t want this, so why should Grian? From Scar’s POV, he’s just tired of the game, just wanting the jellies to bring Grian happiness like they do him. Grian seems so anxious to Win, but Scars just exhausted, and obviously not welcome here, not anymore. Not like he used to be.

oh that is such an interesting read!! not quite mine, but hmm, i'm gonna have to mull that over bc... possibilities possibilities...

see my read is that, yes, there are wild tonal differences between grian and scar's episodes, and as always it's fascinating to see what they (and everyone else) choose to keep versus hide/discard.

grian has had- almost no reference to scar? not even in irritation. he spends all of the first episode trailing after him, promising to protect him, joking and exasperated... and then second episode, sends him out to collect wood, and that's. about it, other than a handful of clips of him complaining at scar about the pandas or scar saying something funny. it's almost a 180, from stalking to complete disinterest, capped off with him setting up to seduce bigb at the end of the episode. he's keeping everything with scar desperately proffesional, arm's-length, almost hermitcraft-y in the way he's chivvying scar along and ordering him about and bullying him - forgetting (or ignoring, or playing a long game with) the fact that life smp scar is very different to hermitcraft scar. life smp scar has teeth. and also a flint and steel. and he's not afraid to use them. but grian is insistent on keeping up this facade of almost aggressive disinterest and indifference, and i really have no idea why he's doing it. bewildering.

scar, though. scar has gone from "haha i don't need a soulmate!" to "i'm going to punish him and torture him" so fucking fast that it's just confirmed my theory that first episode he was absolutely putting on the whole i didn't know grian was my soulmate tee hee thing. he is a man angry. he is a man scorned. he is a man who was always going to be A Problem for grian, even before the panda disagreement. he's gone through all five stages of grief over his weird fucked up history and current relationship with grian, and he's moved straight onto what he does best - distracting himself, through wilful violence, with the fun side-effect of punishing grian simultaneously (both through the soulbond's shared pain, and through forcing grian to abandon his own plans to come and protect scar). he desperately wants grian's affection and attention, but is incapable of asking for that and also pissed off with the rejection, and so now he's going to make that literally everyone's problem. he went fully evil and unhinged this episode, similar to the stuff we saw from him on red in last life, and it's just... chef's kiss. it's so good. i can't wait to see more.

#dlsmp #double life smp #trafficshipping #scarian #anonymous #ask #life smp tag #sparx chats #djfshdfk anon you. you do not have to angst warn for me #there are Very few things you need to warn for with me #i am. Largely Unshakeable

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ingolds · 1 year

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GET TO KNOW THE AUTHOR

name: ana! pronouns: they / them preference of communication: almost entirely discord. tumblr notifs don't work on my phone. i also use twitter fairly often but that's more for shitposting than genuine communication with people most active muse: theo, most definitely. i have a couple other blogs here and there but they're inactive experience / how many years: please don't make me think about this lol. we'll say over 10 years best experience: making friends way back when that have stuck with me :) it's hard to find people worth keeping around and i'm happy i've managed to carve out a niche here and find others that enjoy my company and want to write with me rp pet peeves: pbbbt. writing fucked up topics without the proper care or research. also, holding weird, arbitrary standards about blog appearance. who cares if you do or don't use icons and graphics. honestly fluff, angst, or smut: ANY AND ALL. it's been a minute since i wrote angst tho despite theo being a fairly tragic character aha. i'm always happy to write fluff. smut is ultra fun. like i said, down for everything plots or memes: i like memes as an opener! and i, in fact, encourage any new mutuals to send something in so we can get started. from there i love to plot things out AND i also love pre-established anything long or short replies: see i would say sort replies but i am incapable of shutting up so they almost always end up long. i like flexing my fingers to write paragraphs time to write: mostly at wildly late hours. i work the graveyard shift, so. most of my writing gets done during downtime there. i just throw everything into my queue from there are you like your muses: as much as i would love to look as good as theo and be as wise and kind, i am sadly not haha. i will say we share similar interests - reading, going to museums, being in the outdoors, stopping off at a cafe to try the coffee

tagged by: @fasciinating TY!!! tagging: everyone that sees this. Do It

#OOC.#this was fun :)

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just-absolutely-super · 1 year

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Okay since we're kinda in angst territory I do have a headcanon, or well something I believed to be true for a long time.

I always thought that when Lan dies MegaMan would also die, cause they're connected by the link.

Lan could stay alive without Megaman, but not the other way around cause Lan was there long before Megaman was finished and the link was in place, but it isn't the same for MegaMan.

Hope this made sense

See the link thing is so weird for me to wrap my head around

Yuichiro implied that the reason he kept Hub.bat away from Mega was because it'll put him and Lan at 100%--implying that they will share injuries and even death

But other than this explanation we don't really SEE that in the games

I mean, yeah, if Megaman get deleted in the game it's an automatic game over, so maybe Lan dies too but we don't see it??? It's just so vague of a concept to me.

As for once Lan gets older, I kinda feel like Megaman would stay alive even after Lan passes?

This is mostly just because I don't want to think about Mega dying, but since he's partially artificial, there's that factor that he could theoretically live a long time.

Granted, I feel like if Lan died he would potentially die afterwards, not just because of a link but because Lan means so much to him it would be similar to dying of a broken heart (haha irony *sobbing*)

tldr; I can see it going both ways, either Mega lives for years after Lan's passing or he dies immediately after Lan does

#anon #responses #mmbn hc land #i have...a more detailed hc about this subject but i won't get into it here because it needs a lot of ironing out

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shadesofdeviant · 2 years

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Get To Know My Writing

Tagged by the wonderful Jay! (@rxsterek) Thanks this was fun to do!

What is your total posted word count on AO3? 57,258

How often do you write? I used to write daily, and if I'm really keen and into an idea, I can write daily and smash out quite a few words. However, more often than not, I have these weekly or monthly phases of writing with ease, and then wanting desperately to write but my brain isn't cooperating, and then where my brain just has no inspiration whatsoever and I doubt everything. So I tend to just let my brain do what it wants, and hope I can get bits written.

Do you have a routine for writing? I like to bombard someone with the idea, and absolutely bury them in information and plot/scene ideas I already have. Use them as a sounding board and get an idea of whether they think the idea is good. Then when I actually write, I pop my playlists on so I can zone out (TV shows or silence results in me getting too distracted) and start writing. If it's an AU that involves a whole new characterisation and world-building, I like to make a PowerPoint presentation. I also find that I write better from 11pm to 4am.

What’s your favorite tropes/pairing? I'm not too sure about tropes. I mean, I guess AU counts as a trope right? I really enjoy reading canon fix fics. I have opinions at times regarding canon and I do enjoy it when someone else finds the same issues and writes it better. I've never done it myself through. I write a LOT of fluff though. Pairing wise, I have too many to mention haha.

Do you have a favorite fic of yours? Actually yeah. I normally hate everything I write, but I actually submitted a few of them for lists recently to share with others, which I don't normally do. My favourites are "Rainbow Coloured Monstrosity" and "Music Is Our Sanctuary" which are Tarlos fluff fics, and "Your Arms Are Like Corset Strings" Which is a Buddie 5+1 fluff, angst and smut fic, and "Neon Squares" which is a fluffy Russley fic.

Your fic with the most kudos? The most Kudos I have is 675 on a Buddie fluffy one-shot called "Stand By This Is Getting Weird". Which is odd because I didn't think it was that popular. It's got like...double the amount of Kudos the 2nd place one has.

Anything you don’t like about your writing? I have a real hyper fixation when it comes to fics. I get a new idea and get super, super involved and inspired and eager to write it instantly to the point I ignore everything else I've got planned. I also have this horrid habit of coming up with an idea, but then it ends up not even getting off the ground and just sitting there without ever being used. And those which I do start, never get finished.

Now something you do like? I think I do fluff quite well, and I think I come up with some decent ideas even if they never come to fruition.

Tagging: @noxsoulmate, @chaotictarlos, @alidravana and anyone else who wants to play along.

#rinwrites #tag game #get to know my writing

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godonthetraintracks · 2 years

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Inbox lightning round!

Elesa will be showing up in the au... eventually. We'll see her reaction then, but I feel like you can probably imagine how she'd feel about Emmet going missing and coming back as god. Though tbh she should expect something like this from him haha.

Emmet's already met all of the ride nobles at this point "off-screen", and their reactions range from suspicious like Sneasler to very understanding like Wyrdeer. Where the others fall on that scale is up to your interpretation! As for the other nobles, hmmm... I don't have an answer for how/if he'll meet him yet, but they definitely know of his existence in Hisui. We'll see!

I know, who would do this to poor Emmet 😔😔😔😔 In all seriousness tho, I know it's a lot of angst lately, but things will get better. Of course, in order for that to happen some things will have to get worse first. But no one said crossing time and space to find your lost brother would be easy!

You're right that this is an interesting question! Unfortunately, Emmet did not bring his Pokemon with him to Hisui. Where they are now is a matter that will be explained eventually, but suffice to say they're back (or foreward?) in modern times and not available to him. The same goes for Ingo's pokemon, too.

Awwww omg that's such a cute drawing! And personally, I do think the "bedazzled hula hoop" is a permanent fixture, probably fused to the skin somehow. That doesn't stop Emmet from threatening to take a saw to it so he can lay down normally, though.

The feature that's worst for him is definitely the legs, secondarily the ring because it keeps him from sleeping comfortably. The arms aren't as bad as you'd think, because aside from getting in the way occasionally/moving in unfortunate ways they actually come in handy (aha) sometimes. I imagine when he finds a way to turn back he'll at least slightly miss having a second set of arms, imagine how well he could operate a train with them!

Also, Emmet (but really Ingo and Akari) have a running tab with the people of Jubilife village for every time Emmet has left a ring-shaped hole in the sides of doorways. As he gets more used to his new body he does it less and less, but we know how... excitable he can be. Poor spidey-Emmet and doors do not mix.

Arceus' situation is hard to explain, but they are both aware of what Emmet is doing (and feeling) yet completely unable to interact with the world at present. Their consciousness essentially doesn't exist in our reality anymore, and if it had tried to share Emmet's headspace it would have had... dire consequences for him. So for now, Arceus is pretty much out of the picture. Certainly makes things more complicated, hmm?

The plates do work on Emmet and change his type, but it's more cosmetic than anything so it's just a fun novelty to him and Akari... for now. I personally don't think changing types actually makes him feel all that different, and lugging around a weird plate with the practical functionality of a mood ring isn't high on his list of priorities. They might make a more significant appearance later, though!

Ingo is.... complicated, right now. What's frustrating about this is that he likely would've remembered more by now if not for the fact that he is actively avoiding the situation for a variety of reasons, but mostly because he's, well, frightened of all the unknowns. That being said, those brotherly instincts are very much still there (he oftentimes finds himself reflexively calling out to Emmet when he sees him doing something reckless, for example). He will, however, remember him someday. I promise.

Also, he didn't overhear the conversation between Emmet and Akari... you can bet that if he had, it would've been a bit of a wake-up call for him. But we can't have nice things apparently.

#answers #inbox lightning round #submas #pokemon legends arceus #pokemon #subway boss emmet #subway boss ingo #warden ingo #pla akari #arceus #Setting this up to post while I'm at work so I'll have to reopen the ask box when I get off #Hope this format works alright!

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frospino · 3 years

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A Sheep in your Palm

Pairing: Marius von Hagen (Lu Jinghe) x Reader

Genre: SOULMATE AU TIME!!! fluff-angst-fluff sandwich.

Word Count: 6.342

Warnings: When Marius and Reader find out they're soulmates, Marius is 18, Reader is 21. They're 21 and 24 respectively when they meet. Please don't read if that makes you uncomfortable. - Reader swears a lot, mentions of alcohol, mentions of sexual themes, a moment in which Reader uses their palm connection to leave crescent marks

A/N: SOULMATE AU SOULMATE AU SOULMATE AU. Honestly I've wanted to write one for Marius for a while. I also wanted to write a Reader character that is a little more bratty/swear-y than my other Readers, because I think Marius could take it. Regarding their ages - I've started this with a different Reader character in mind, one that could also be read as Rosa if you wanted to, but the Reader had their own mind. I've kept the ages as I originally wrote them.

The whole “once you and your soulmate turn 18, you can write messages to each other on your palm!” thing sounded incredibly cute in theory. You’ve seen your friends share sweet doodles with their soulmates, or share romantic song lyrics. Some even bought a special pen that could be erased so that they could have entire WhatsApp-like conversations on their palms. You’ve anticipated your 18th birthday for so long. Once the clock strikes midnight, you start writing little notes, simple things like “Hello! I’m excited to meet you.”

When there’s no reply, you don’t dwell on it too much. Maybe your soulmate has already gone to bed. Your 18th birthday just had to fall on a weekday, after all. Maybe they have to get up early tomorrow, or just enjoy sleep. No problem at all.

The next morning, you write, “Good morning!” and draw a little sun next to it. Again, there is no reply. Either your soulmate lives in a different time zone (which would suck) or they are one of those people who think soulmates are stupid (which would suck even more).

After days without contact, you try one last time. “Hey, just let me know if you’re there, okay? I’ll stop pestering you.”

No reply. Apparently, you are doomed to remain on mute with your fucking soulmate.

--- 3 years later ---

It’s one of the hottest days of the year, which you and your friends have decided to spend at a small lake close to the city. They’ve brought the drinks, you’ve brought the music (as much as you love them, they can’t be trusted with playlist-powers), and you are having a blast when suddenly, one of your friends asks, “Yo, where’d that come from? Did you just hit your hand or something?”

You furrow your brows in confusion and look down at your hand. Huh. Weird. That dark-blue splotch hadn’t been there before. “I dunno. I didn’t feel anything at least.” Vera grins. “Not like that’s anything new.”

You’re about to protest her comment when another colour appears on your hand, red this time. “Okay, I definitely didn’t do anything. What the fuck is this?”

Harry’s eyes grow larger for a moment, then he starts to chuckle. “What? What’s so funny?” you shoot at him. Harry grins. “Seems like someone’s soulmate is a few years younger than them.”

Your mouth forms a perfect “o” as you stare at your hand again. It all starts to make sense now. Your soulmate isn’t an asshole who refuses to talk. Apparently, he was simply born on the afternoon of June 21st… and is roughly three years younger than you.

Vera starts rummaging through her bag and, with a triumphant “haha!”, fishes out a pen. “Quick, write back! This is so exciting!” You absent-mindedly grab the pen with your other hand, still staring at the colourful display on your palm. “What the fuck are they doing though?”

Harry and Vera both study your hand intently, and eventually, Harry speaks up. “Maybe they’re a painter? A messy one?” Vera nods in silent support of this theory. You answer, “I know just what to write then.” Your tongue peaks out of your mouth as you concentrate on writing with your non-dominant hand—of course your “communicative palm” would be the one you need for writing. Hi, can you maybe not colour my palm in a rainbow, thanks! You look at your handiwork and are satisfied with the result.

“Don’t you want your first words to your soulmate be… I don’t know, a little nicer?” Vera asks. “Nah, this is fine,” you reply matter-of-factly. “Honestly, I’ve grown so used to the thought of my soulmate being an asshole. I’m not sure I still want one.”

“What if they turn out to be cool, though? I mean, a painter. That’s so special,” Harry swoons, envy obvious in his face. Harry’s soulmate had turned out to be the school bully, and he’s given him a wide berth ever since his 18thbirthday. Even the idea of a redemption ark with happy ending hasn’t made him warm up to his soulmate.

You just shrug your shoulders. “I mean, right now, what it means is that they’re making a right mess of my palm. Imagine if this happened during a job interview or something.” Just as you utter those words, you feel a light tingle on your palm, and a line of neat writing appears above all the colour splotches. Sorry about that! Wasn’t aware the colour would show too! I’ll be more careful! A few moments later, both the writing and the colour disappear from your palm, leaving only the message you wrote on it.

“Hey, at least the kid seems nice,” Vera says.

“Do not call my soulmate ‘the kid’, I dare you.”

“Or what?”

“We are close to a lake, and I can carry and throw you.”

“Oh, you wouldn’t dare! And your soulmate is a kid.”

All thoughts of your new-found soulmate are momentarily forgotten as you chase your friend around the lake. You have a point to make that is more important than communicating with a complete stranger.

---

Marius sighs heavily as he stares at his palm. “This is not how I expected my first soulmate meeting to go,” he mumbles to himself. Honestly? Of course he’d known the paint would show. He’d seen it with plenty of his course mates. He’d simply speculated that his soulmate would be impressed when they found out he’s a painter. At least a little.

He tries to ignore the sting in his heart when he remembers how dismissive the first message he ever received from his soulmate sounded. With his station as a von Hagen, he knows he has little chance of meeting someone who isn’t just interested in the money, the business, the connections, or the fame. Even though it’s only his 18thbirthday today, he’s experienced enough hurt and betrayal to last him a lifetime. It’s one of the reasons why he’s wanted to go abroad for his studies, to a country where he could just be Marius. He’s had a couple of flings in his short time here, and has tried to enjoy student life as much as he could, but he knows he has to return to Stellis and face the reality soon enough. He has placed a lot of hope—maybe all of his hope—into this soulmate-thing.

He sighs again and spends some time pitying himself before picking up the paint brush once more. “Sorry soulmate, but I have an assignment to finish,” he says to no-one in particular, “and I can’t ruin my painting by focusing on keeping my hands clean.”

The longer he paints, the more his thoughts ruminate and the more spiteful he grows. Eventually, he coats his palm in neon-pink paint just because he can. And maybe because he wants attention, but mostly because he wants to annoy his so-called soulmate. “That’s for being mean.”

It doesn’t take long until Marius is rewarded with a tingling in his palm and the appearance of squiggly, almost unreadable lines. You okay? Did something just explode?

He grins and the message. Is that worry for him? A von Hagen always gets what he wants, after all. He picks up a pen and replies, Just wanted to make sure you’re still there.

Oh great you’re a brat

And you’re rude. I guess that makes us even.

Marius stares at his palm for a while, but no new messages appear, and he’s afraid he has scared you off again. (It’s definitely attention he wants, but no one has to know that, and he’d never acknowledge it, even to himself.) He’s about to turn back to his painting assignment when a name appears on his palm. I figured I should introduce myself

He says your name out loud a couple of times, feels the way it rolls of his tongue. He tries saying it as if he’s in love, you being his soulmate and all, but then his ears turn bright red and his face is on fire and he promises himself never to do that again.

I’m Marius. Nice to meet you properly.

A slightly distorted smiley face appears on his palm, followed by a Shit sorry hard to draw with this hand. Marius laughs and takes a picture with his phone. The angle is weird since he has to hold out the canvas-palm, but he thinks the messages and drawing on neon-pink background might make for a nice memory someday. He then picks up his pen again and adds to the smiley face, trying to fix it and make it look slightly more… respectable. There you go. We make a good team.

When the reply appears on his hand, a warm, fuzzy feeling spreads through his belly and leaves him slightly light-headed. I guess we do. I have to go to bed now (btw where u at), talk to you later

I’m an art student in Florence atm. Sleep well.

Ha caught you speaking non-formally for a sec!!! also Florence as in Italy? Guess it will be some time before we can mee

Marius waits for the t to appear, but instead, the last e trails off until it reaches his wrist, where the message cuts off. His soulmate must have fallen asleep in the middle of the sentence. He places his wrist on his chest, not caring about the splatter of neon-pink paint that ruins his white shirt. (He would, one day, learn not to paint in a white shirt. Maybe.) He wonders if he can will the warmth of his body to reach your hand if he focuses hard enough. He wonders what you look like, where you live, what your hobbies are, what your favourite food is. There’s so much he wants to ask, and he doesn’t know how he could ever fit all of that onto his palm.

Instead of asking all those questions that are lingering on his mind right now, he draws a small, sleeping sheep on his palm, and because he’s feeling brave, the tiniest of hearts next to it. When Marius looks at the picture, he panics for a moment—is that too much? That is definitely too much. Should I erase the heart? No, I want them to know I enjoyed our conversation.

Suddenly, Marius remembers a conversation he’s had with his father about soulmates. “But dad, I want them to like me for myself, not just because I’m a von Hagen,” tiny Marius (okay, 15-years-old Marius) had said earnestly. His father had smiled then, with the warmth that was reserved for the private moments between them, away from the prying eyes of Marius’s stepmother. “Marius, you’re a wonderful human being. You’re intelligent, and kind, and talented. Whoever your soulmate is, they will be lucky to have you in their life.”

Marius decides to keep the heart on his palm, after all.

--- 3 years later ---

Vera bursts into your room without knocking, a crumpled magazine held high in her right hand. “You will not believe this.”

“I do indeed not believe you just barged into my room like that! I could’ve been naked,” you complain, pretending to cover your (very much clothed) body with your blanket.

“Oh shut up, I know you’re re-watching your idol anime again.” Vera rolls your eyes at you and plops down on your bed next to you. You grin at her and sit up straight. “You got me. What’s up?”

She opens the magazine at a dog-eared page and practically shoves it into your face. “Look at that.” You do as you’re told, but all you see is another spread of Pax’s young CEO, Marius von Hagen, posing like the part of the 1% that he is.

Vera and you had joked about this before – what if the Marius von Hagen is your soulmate? His birthday is June 21st, he’s three years younger than you, his name is Marius… and he is easily wealthy enough to afford education in fucking Italy. You had almost convinced yourself that this weird idea of yours must be true, and had quickly convo-palmed (as you took to calling it) “your” Marius about it.

Dude you’re crazy. Do you really think I wouldn’t have told you by now??? was the reply you got. It was rare to see “your” Marius use three question marks in a row. After a long analysis session with Vera (and a couple of bottles of red wine which definitely hadn’t clouded your judgement), you came to the conclusion that Marius von Hagen would have bragged about… well, being Marius von Hagen. The playboy-extraordinaire-most-wanted-Bachelor-slash-crazy-rich-person would definitely have told you of his status, that much became apparent when you devoured all the interviews you could find online. It was an unlikely coincidence, but not an impossible one. With billions of people on the planet, more than one Marius could be born on June 21st.

Which is precisely why you don’t understand how another magazine spread of him could warrant the introduction ‘You will not believe this.’ You take another look at the magazine in front of you, silently noting that you certainly wouldn’t mind “your” Marius looking something like this, before you turn to Vera. “We’ve been over this.”

Vera points to a particular line in the interview which she has underlined in thick, black marker. “I know, but look at this.” You sigh, wondering what your best friend is up to now, and read the line. “Marius von Hagen graduated with a cum laude, or First Honour’s degree, in Art History from the University of Florence… What the fuck am I reading here?” For some reason, your heart begins pumping at an incredible speed. This is new information, as far as you can tell. You’re certain you would have found this particular piece of information in your research before. “Vera, you didn’t fake this, did you?”

Vera shakes her head, sending her long hair flying everywhere. “I didn’t! I’d never do that to you! But honestly, if this is true… and why wouldn’t it be! Surely, Marius von Hagen didn’t research ‘random person’s soulmate I could impersonate in interviews’?” You blink, once, twice, and you can feel your soul leaving your body as you reply, “Yeah, that doesn’t seem plausible. Fuck. I think…”

You look at your palm. Earlier that day, Marius had asked you for a good luck charm because he had an important meeting coming up, and you have drawn a small, sleeping sheep with a tiny heart next to it. The sheep has become somewhat of a mascot in your relationship, and with tedious practice, you have managed to make it look cute even with your non-dominant hand.

“You have to ask him again,” Vera insists, and you nod your head. Your best friend gives you an encouraging hug and turns to leave the room. Before she closes the door behind her, she speaks up one more time. “…if it does turn out Marius von Hagen is your fucking soulmate, I want a villa for enduring your messiness and cleaning up after your baking sessions for all these years.”

Her laughter rings in the apartment even as a pillow comes flying after her.

---

Marius groans as he reads the interview. He throws the magazine onto his desk and leans back in his chair, covering his head with both of his arms. “I’m sorry, Sir,” Vincent quietly says, as if this whole debacle is somehow his fault.

“No need. I don’t really know how I managed to keep it up for so long, anyway.”

Marius has tried hard to keep his full identity from you. He’s always been honest… except when it came to this particular topic. Your relationship has been so easy-going and wonderful, and he has allowed himself to cling to the illusion that once Giann was back, and he could finally lay down his duties as Pax’s CEO, he could marry his soulmate and the von Hagen name wouldn’t make a difference. Which is a stupid fantasy, he knows, but it’s what has given him strength through all the trouble he’s faced since coming home.

He waits for his hand to tingle and the accusations to start flooding in. Liar. You deceived me. He feels tears prick at the corners of his eyes, but he can’t let himself cry now. Not here, not in front of Vincent. “Could you leave me for a moment? I need to… collect my thoughts.”

Vincent, ever the faithful assistant and friend, bows and says, “Of course, Sir.” Marius wants nothing more than to switch positions with him right now.

Somehow, you had agreed to his request of keeping the relationship strictly text-conversational. You’ve exchanged phone numbers because the canvas-palm space got a little tight, but you have never called each other, never sent pictures or exchanged addresses. He had made up a story about the sentimental value of texting and canvas-palm-conversations, all the while thinking, “I don’t know how you’ll react to finding out who I am and I’m scared.” He’s built this entire public persona as a playboy who loves flaunting his wealth, hoping that even if you connected the dots—things like his age, his birthday—you’d think that Marius von Hagen would’ve told you of his status right away.

His plan had worked, for the most part. Until the editor of Stellis Finance somehow found out about his studies in Florence and built that information into an interview with Marius.

Marius feels his hand tingle, the tell-tale sign of a message coming in, and he wonders if he can just… never look at his hand again and pretend none of this happened. He sighs—he knows he won’t be able to leave his soulmate “on read”. Or go a single day without talking to you. He opens his palm and looks at your message. The lines are all squiggly again, similar to the first messages you’ve sent him. He knows how much better you’ve gotten at writing with your non-dominant hand, knows this is a sign of how upset you are.

We need to talk. On the phone. I want to hear your voice.

Proper grammar and punctuation marks. He’s really in for it now. He chokes out a laugh, and now the tears do stream from his eyes. All he wanted, wants, is a relationship that isn’t influenced by his last name, and now he’s gone and messed that up.

He wipes his tears with his suit sleeve even though the rough material irritates his skin. Marius takes a deep breath and picks up his phone. Whatever comes next, he owes it to you to be honest this time.

---

It’s a little embarrassing how quickly you pick up the phone when you see Marius’s contact information on the screen, but there’s no way you can wait even a second longer to hear his voice. “Hey,” you breathe into the speaker, and the anticipation makes you fidget and change the way you sit on your bed at least three times in the span of five seconds.

“Hey,” comes the reply, and even that single word is enough. You immediately recognise the youthful voice from the countless videos you’ve watched online in your “research sessions” with Vera.

“…do you have time to talk right now?” you ask, unsure of how to start this conversation. Marius chuckles and says, “Sure. I’ve relayed my phone to my assistant.”

“…It must be nice to be your own boss, huh?” Your voice is laced with more bitterness than you intended to, and you wish you could take back what you just said. You hear a long exhale on the other end of the call. “…it is, sometimes. Most of the time, it creates… expectations.”

“What kind of expectations are we talking about here? I mean, I wouldn’t have said ‘go buy me a mansion and a crown’ or whatever.”

Marius laughs, but there’s no happiness in the sound. If anything, it’s almost void of emotion, and it scares you. This is not the Marius you’ve come to know during the past three years. “I’m sorry, but I’ve heard that before.”

“From whom, all the conquests you’ve had over the years we’ve been talking? And here I thought you were just shy.” You press your fingertips into your palm and hope the pain reaches him. A sharp hiss on the other end of the line confirms your line of thought. “Huh, I didn’t think that would work, to be honest.”

“It does, and it hurts like a bitch,” Marius says through what you imagine are gritted teeth. “Stop that.”

You press a little harder, just because you can.

“Oww—fuck—okay, okay, I get it! You’re angry I lied, and I’m sorry, okay?”

“So you think you apologise and we go back to drawing snoozing sheep? Honestly, the hiding your identity I can somehow understand. The sleeping around? Definitely not. I’ve been waiting to meet you all this time, Marius. I thought… I thought you felt the same.”

---

A sob escapes his throat before he can stop it. This is too much. This is all too much. I’ve been waiting to meet you all this time, Marius. The sentence echoes in his head, amplifies with each second, until his ears ring and he wishes he could just make it all stop for a second.

“I never slept with anyone. Not after… not after we started talking.” Even he can tell how weak this sounds, how unbelievable, after he’s spent so much time and money on fabricating rumours. He never really thought this far ahead. In his fantasies, you’d just… believed him when he told you none of the things the papers wrote are true.

“There were pictures, Marius. A lot of pictures.”

“Never of anything more than a hug or a lingering hand though, I made sure… I told them to make it look real enough…” He trails off and pays closer attention to the half-moon-like red marks on his palm. ‘Whoever your soulmate is, they will be lucky to have you in their life.’ Huh. Look at the mess I’ve made of this, Dad.

“What do you mean, ‘you told them’?” Your voice is calmer now, and Marius can’t tell if you’re opening up to his side of the story—or if you are simply done with him. He chooses to believe it’s the former.

“I paid actors and actresses to pretend to be my date because… I wanted to make sure you’d never believe Marius von Hagen and your Marius could be the same person,” he whispers into the phone, and suddenly, when he says it out loud, he feels very, very young and very, very stupid. He hears you sigh on the other end of the phone, and the sound of you shuffling around in your seat. “Marius, I kinda feel like we should be having this talk in person. I know creative people have weird minds and all, but this is a little too van Gogh for me.”

For the first time since you’ve started talking, Marius relaxes a little. He recognises this way of speaking and your weird humour, and he lets himself hope that he might not have lost you just yet. “I have some business proposals to go over, but would you be willing to meet up for dinner tonight? My treat. I know a place that would guarantee our privacy…”

--- 3 hours later ---

The little café isn’t exactly what you’ve expected Marius – von Hagen, you remind yourself for the nth time today – to choose. It’s cosy, with chairs and tables made out of old wood, pastel-coloured table runners and white porcelain cups. An old lady greets you and asks for your name, and upon hearing your reply, her face immediately lights up in recognition. “Ah. Follow me, please.”

She leads you up a narrow, winding staircase, and you’re surprised to find yourself in a small room with only a single table in it, lit by dimmed lanterns on the wall. “This room is reserved for our more… prominent guests,” she answers your unspoken question. You sit down on the offered chair and stroke the table cloth. It’s not as soft as it looks. “Does Mar—Mr. von Hagen come here often?” The lady chuckles and shakes her head, her features graced by a fond smile. “Every once in a while. He sometimes brings a group of friends here. I like the silver-haired one. He knows his teas.”

You’re about to reply that you don’t actually know any of his friends when a voice speaks up downstairs. “Grandma?” The lady smiles at you again and says, “Be kind to him. He has a gentler heart than most people suspect.” She shuffles down the stairs and you can hear her talking to Marius – you can’t make out the words, but the fondness in her voice remains. While all of this is very in line with how you’ve come to know your soulmate, it absolutely doesn’t fit with the image you have of Marius von Hagen.

In short, it’s extremely fucking weird.

Footsteps echo up the stairs, and you try your very best to calm down your anxiety. It’s just Marius. The guy I’ve been having palm-convos with for three years. My soulmate who draws weird sheep as a good luck-charm. These thoughts, however, help little when Marius shows up still dressed in parts of his business attire – black slacks and a white dress-shirt. At least he’s dropped the jacket and the tie, and his sleeves are rolled up, his collar a little crumpled. His forearms seem way too toned for someone who sits at a desk all day, and his ear piercings reflect the lantern light when he turns towards you. His posture is straight, confident even, but the look on his face… his eyebrows almost form a double u-shape with how tightly they are drawn together, and when his eyes meet yours, he rubs his neck with one hand. “Hey. We, uh, we finally meet, huh?” he says, and it’s so awkward and adorable and he has a gentler heart than most people suspect and your palm is tingling and suddenly you know, deep in your heart, that this is your Marius, after all. Titles and money and public persona be damned.

“All this time, I thought you were maybe conscious about your looks or something. But look at you. You’re radiant, and my shirt is three years old.”

Marius’s mouth opens slightly, and somehow, he goes from super attractive to super adorkable in milliseconds. You try to hide your smile behind your hand – you don’t want to make him even more nervous. But you also really want to laugh at his expression. It’s a tough battle of wants.

“I mean. It doesn’t look three years old,” Marius says, and with that, the weird tension between you two seems to resolve. You look down at your shirt and back up at him, sticking your tongue out before saying, “It does, though.”

There’s a beat of silence – and then Marius starts to laugh and pulls the other chair back. “Yeah, it does, but I didn’t want to offend you.” You hold up a hand, and Marius stops in his movement. “Wait. Before you sit down. Can I hug you?” His grin grows even wider, and that mischievous look reminds you so much of neon-pink paint and late-night debates over your favourite Ninja Turtles that your heart dances in your chest. Marius holds out his arms and says, “I insist on it.”

You jump up, almost toppling over your chair in the process, and leap into his embrace. You nuzzle your face into the crook of his neck as his arms wrap around you. “I thought you’d hate me,” he mumbles against your hair, and you pull back to look at him with a light frown. “Convo-palm out!”, you command, and he does as you ask, breathing out a quiet but insistent “Canvas-palm.” You hold your convo-palm to his, feeling a tingle that is much stronger than when you received a message (or paint splotches).

You’ve watched movies about soulmates meeting, but for some reason, not a single one of them has managed to capture this… warmth that is spreading out from your touching palms. It’s as if you’re holding a tiny sun between your hands. Or maybe a mug of hot cocoa, something warm and pleasant that wouldn’t actually burn your skin off. You marvel at the sensation and look from your palms to Marius’s face, and the softness in his eyes tells you he feels it, too. “Dummy. I’m your soulmate. You’re not getting rid of me that easily.”

Marius curls his fingers into yours, and for a long moment, the both of you just stand there in silence. “Why have we waited three years to do this?” he eventually asks. You poke his chest with the index finger of your other hand. “That is a very good question, Mr. von Hagen. One I would like to pass on to you. What’s with the whole identity-hiding-thing?”

You almost regret asking because Marius’s eyebrows drop again. He’s still holding on to your convo-palm, actively preventing you from smoothing the offending lines of hair into their normal shape. Marius looks down at the ground, then sighs and nods his head towards the table. “Let’s sit down and order before I start to explain.”

---

Marius thinks he could fill an entire sketchbook with the expressions you’re making as you listen to his explanation. He talks about his childhood, from climbing trees and being smothered by both attention and worry to finding out his ‘friends’ only visited him for the rare toys he owned. He talks about the strained relationship with his step-mother and the years of trying to please a woman who had given up on her own soulmate to marry into the von Hagen family, never quite managing to fill the void left behind by the passing of his mother. He talks about his passion for art and travelling as far away as Florence to pursue it – only to have a course mate find out he comes from money and all of his passion and talent suddenly being weighed against his family name.

“Being a von Hagen,” he closes his monologue, “has been a gift – but in relationships? It’s nothing but a burden. It’s as if I’m von Hagen first, Marius second. I just… wanted my soulmate to see the real me. But then I got so carried away with my scheming that I couldn’t find a way to tell you the truth anymore.”

You look up at the ceiling and click the teaspoon against your top lip, and Marius desperately wants to know what you’re thinking, but he also knows that he just unloaded a lot of information. He feels as if the weight of two cars has been lifted of his shoulders; he hopes you’re not the one carrying it now.

You finally look into his eyes again, and there’s a glint of something he can’t quite place. Without saying a word, you start rummaging around your bag and pull out a pen. You make a show of holding out your canvas-palm in front of your face so that he can’t see what you’re writing, but he recognises the shape by the tingle alone. He looks down at his own palm, and sure enough, there’s a sheep staring up at him. Instead of a tiny heart, however, you’ve drawn a big heart around it this time, and the grin spreading on his face is so wide he thinks his cheek muscles might be sore tomorrow.

He holds out his hand, and you’re the one intertwining your fingers this time. Again, the warmth spreads through his entire body. I could get used to this feeling, he thinks. He wonders if the two of you could light a sparkler with only your palms. He’d certainly like to try that, some day.

“I’m not going to say ‘I get it’, because I don’t think I really do,” you say, and his happiness almost falters. “I mean. The first thing someone like me sees is that a rich person can afford anything they want. It seems like the dream.” You draw tiny circles into his palm with your thumb, and he wonders if there’s a sort of feedback on your own palm. He wonders if, no, hopes that you can feel how serious he is about this, about you. “But the things you said… Not being seen for who you really are would make anyone sad, money or not. I get why you wanted to be cautious, at least.”

“However,” you continue, raising one finger in the air, and he is suddenly reminded of the one time Luke tried to imitate Vyn and almost starts to laugh. He presses his lips together, and you raise one eyebrow at him and say, “Focus, Mr. von Hagen, I’m being serious here!”

“Sorry, sorry. I’m focusing. Wait.” He tries to think of his first bungee jump and how nerve-wrecking that was and manages to control his features. “Okay, continue.”

“However,” you start once more, raising your finger again, and it almost breaks his façade but he somehow prevails. “If you want us to have a chance, soulmates or not, you have to be honest with me from now on, okay? You have to give me the chance to actually understand and see you. Not just the happy Marius, but the sad and scared and nervous Marius, too.”

He makes a grimace and shakes his head. “But I don’t like that Marius. He makes stupid decisions.” You squeeze his hand in response. “Dude, that’s okay. Everyone makes stupid decisions sometimes. I make stupid decisions all the time, like eating fish for dinner and not doing the dishes immediately afterwards.”

Marius snorts and immediately freezes. That was such an undignified sound, and he’s trying very hard to impress you right now because he has a lot to make up for. There’s a devilish grin on your face as you say, “See? That’s the real Marius I want to see, too. Give me a warning next time though, because that would have made for great blackmail material.”

He kicks you under the table and tries to pull his canvas-palm away from you, but you’re stronger than he expected (and to be completely honest, he’s not really trying hard at all). “I’m warning you. I will draw dicks on your hand when you’re in the middle of an important interview.”

“You say that as if you haven’t done that before.”

Marius stops his pretend-struggle and studies your face – and is horrified to find you completely honest. “Wait, what? I did? You never told me—”

“It’s fine,” you interrupt him, “I knew you’d get all flustered but try to cover it up and become super clingy and attention-seeking instead and I didn’t want the job anyway.”

Marius pouts and does his best impression of a golden retriever puppy. “I am not clingy and attention-seeking.” For some reason, the magic of his puppy eyes doesn’t seem to work on you. He’ll have to find out your favourite dog breed and take some pointers. He files that particular “to do” away in his mind for another day. You laugh at him, and he has the urge to tickle you until you can’t breathe, but you’re still in public and even though it doesn’t feel like it, this is your first meeting and he doesn’t want to make it weird but he really wants to be close to you and—

“Oh God. I totally am, aren’t I?”

You start laughing even harder. He notices that your canvas-palms are still intertwined, and he can’t help but join in your laughter, even if it is at his expense. He’s so used to having to pretend to be perfect that letting down his barriers feels wrong, but he knows it’s necessary. After all, how can he ever hope to truly connect with you with all of his masks still up?

Once your laughter subsides, a content silence settles over the two of you. Marius is happy enough with just studying your face and taking in your features… for a while. He can’t help but tease you back, though – truly, he’s earned it, he thinks. “How do you feel about bungee jumping?”

All the colour leaves your face for a second as you stop all motion, your cup of tea raised to your mouth. “You mean like… VR bungee jumping, right?”

He grins. “Nope.”

“So what you’re saying is, the ‘Marius von Hagen likes extreme sports’ bit is not made up?”

He grins even wider. “Yupp.”

“And your idea of an ideal date is… bungee jumping?”

He cups his face with two of his fingers, grin still in place – though he realises this pose probably doesn’t look as cool with his other hand still firmly in your grasp. “You know, clinging to your partner in terror during your first jump is something that can actually be so romantic—”

You groan, and in a blur of limbs somehow manage to drop your tea cup, flail about trying to save what you can, and almost fall of your chair. Marius looks at the mess – at the large stain in the pastel-coloured table runner, and the tea spots on his dress shirt, and your disgruntled look, and in that moment, he’s so proud of himself he can barely contain it. “Marius von Hagen,” you say, (and the sensation in his groin at hearing you say his full name in that tone is something else he files away for another day,) “I cannot believe this.”

He winks at you and delights at the way you bury your head in your hands either in embarrassment or infatuation or, if he’s lucky, a bit of both.

“Personally, I believe this is the perfect start to a brilliant soulmate-ship.”

#tears of themis #tears of themis fanfiction #tears of themis imagine #marius von hagen #marius von hagen x reader #lu jinghe x reader #my writing

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hypmic-writings · 3 years

Note

Hi darling! May I request TDD with a fem!S/O who is a SIMP for 2D boys. Like yelling when her husbando smile and crying when reading angst fanfic. Love you

━━ ∘◦ ☆ ◦∘ ━━

Pairing: Ichiro Yamada x reader; Samatoki Aohitsugi x reader; Ramuda Amemura x reader; Jakurai Jinguji x reader

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: None

A/N: This was hilarious and yet I totally understand. I can’t even imagine having an s/o that would have to compete with my anime crushes...unless my s/o was any of TDD members haha hope you enjoy~

⋘ ──── ∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗ ──── ⋙

Ichiro Yamada

Ichiro understands and he hates that he understands

as someone that watches his fair share of anime, Ichiro is also down bad for many characters and his simp list is quite large

I absolutely headcanon Ichiro as someone who secretly reads fanfiction so that’s something the two of you can share together

with all that being said, Ichiro still gets pouty whenever you simp for your 2D crushes more than him

he’s always watching anime with you, so whenever you’re simping for your favorite character, he can see you get excited

as you cheer them on in their fights or laugh at their stupid jokes

Ichiro will actually find himself becoming jealous of a fictional character because you’re spending more time thinking of them than you are of him

at first, he doesn’t really mind because he understands that it’s fun to simp for people, but when you start talking about how cool they are and how much you love them

Ichiro is going to cross his arms and purse his lips

“They’re not that great...isn’t the other character better than them?”

absolutely going to take every opportunity to point out flaws and bad things about your simps

Ichiro doesn’t even try to hide his jealousy and honestly it’s kind of cute that he thinks your 2D crush is his competition

one day when he comes home to see you crying on the couch he’s immediately asking you if you’re okay

and when you tell him you’re just reading a really sad fanfic of your anime husband, he just blankly stares at you

and then tries to flop down on top of you and push your phone away so that you’ll pay more attention to him

I can actually imagine Ichiro asking you point blank who you love more, him or your anime crushes

and you just have to laugh and throw your arms around him because obviously you love Ichiro the most

and that’s when he’s going to grin and hold his head up high

because even though it was literally a competition between him and a fictional character

he still holds some sense of pride that you would choose him

when you ask him the same about his anime crushes, now he’s the one that’s stuttering for an answer

while he sheepishly smiles and refuses to let go of his body pillow with his favorite anime character on it

Samatoki Aohitsugi

Samatoki simply doesn’t understand your obsession with 2D simps

he doesn't really watch anime and he’s never had a crush on any fictional characters so it doesn’t click with him

although he’s definitely seen Ichiro’s obsession so he’s witnessed it first-hand before

when he sees you getting excited over your simp whenever they’re on screen, he just rolls his eyes and shrugs

a part of him thinks it’s cute that you can get so riled up about something you really enjoy

but another part of him thinks it’s annoying that you like a character so much you actually have a crush on them

he’s your boyfriend after all, so shouldn’t he be the only person you have a crush on?

“Y/N, please stop cheering, they didn’t even win the fight yet”

“But they just got their power up! They’re definitely gonna win now!”

when he finds you crying over an angsty fanfiction, Samatoki literally thinks someone hurt you and he’s about to go crazy

but when you tell him it’s just your crush, he deadpans, slowly gets up, and just walks away from you

Samatoki is a weird combination of raging and jealous whenever you rant about how much you love your 2D crush

he’s fine with sitting down and watching anime with you from time to time, and he doesn’t care if you play otome games or read fanfic

but whenever you tell him about how cool your crush is and how great he does certain things, Samatoki won’t have any of it

he’s absolutely going to argue about you, playing devil’s advocate at every point and refuse to admit that your crush is cool in any way

if you have a plushie of your crush, it’s absolutely gone missing from time to time

because Samatoki likes to stare it down and then yeet it across the room whenever he’s in a bad mood

at some point, you have to sit him down and remind him that even though you love your fictional crush, you love Samatoki more

and that gives him some sense of relief, even though he’ll never come around to liking your 2D crush

at least he can rest easy knowing that he’s won and that you’ll always choose him in the end

which is something he’s absolutely told the plush toy while maniacally laughing and stomping on it

Ramuda Amemura

Ramuda thinks it’s amazing that you love a fictional character

whenever your crush is on the screen, Ramuda watches you as you cheer and scream and he plays along

he’s actually quite happy to just play pretend along with you

it’s not like you’re actually in love with the character - it’s just a 2D fictional person you simp for

so he doesn’t mind whenever you gush over them and claim to love them

but when he slowly begins to realize that you actually are obsessed with this fictional character, his attitude begins to change

he definitely becomes more grouchy, pouting about how that character isn’t even real

and that if anything, he is an anime MC because he has bright hair and clothes and an adorable personality

there have been multiple times where Ramuda has almost turned into dark!Ramuda just because of how much you went on and on about loving your 2D ‘husband’

because Ramuda is your boyfriend and he’s the only one entitled to the term ‘husband’ either now or in the future

he slowly begins to hate the characters you love, but he won’t tell you that to your face

he’ll only keep up an exterior of cute, whining and telling you to give him love and hugs rather than fawning over your crushes

but on the inside, Ramuda is burning with hatred

definitely has a ‘burn book’ of pictures with your anime crushes inside of them cut up with their eyes x’d out

and he secretly vows to destroy all of them and for some reason I can almost imagine him getting your favorite show cancelled just to stop production of your anime husband

yea, he’s definitely gonna go a little yandere but you won’t notice because it’s all gonna be under the table

he doesn’t hesitate to try and distract you any time you’re watching the anime with your crush

and if you ever cry while reading fanfiction, Ramuda might just throw your phone accross the room and hug you

saying that he hates your fictional crush for making you cry

so when Ramuda asks if you would ever want to date your 2D crush more than him and you say ‘of course not’, he’s thrilled

and he definitely looks down on the character from that moment on because you just proved that Ramuda is the superior crush

Jakurai Jinguji

Jakurai is simultaneously confused and also fascinated with your obsession for your 2D crush

he doesn’t watch anime or anything so he doesn’t have a fictional crush, but when he sees you yelling and screaming over your favorite character when all they did was smile, it’s clear that they mean something to you

which Jakurai doesn’t really mind

he thinks it’s cute that you have another crush, and I can imagine him saying that as long as it doesn’t affect your relationship, he’s fine with it

Jakurai’s always interested in the way that you talk about your crush like they’re a real person

and he’ll definitely ask you questions like, do you have a crush on the voice actor too? what about characters that have the same features as your fictional crush?

he really just wants to get into your mind and understand how it’s possible that you could be so obsessed with something that’s not real

he doesn’t really get jealous of your fave because he knows that you can differentiate between reality and fantasy

at least he thought you could

when he sees you crying in bed one day, he goes to pull you in his arms, but when you tell him that you’re reading a really sad fanfiction and your favorite character just got injured, he’s a little confused

it’s just a fictional character so why can’t you just...make him uninjured?

he’ll definitely be a little wary of you spending all your time fawning over the character, but he’s not going to say anything to you

it’s your life and he knows he can’t tell you how to live it

he’s definitely going to draw the line at sleeping with a body pillow on the bed because if anyone gets a cuddle, it’s him, not your 2D crush

if you talk about your fictional crush more than you spend time with him, this is when I think he would start to get worried

he might actually bring up that he’s concerned of your addiction, and you just look up at him with confusion

meanwhile there are posters, body pillows, plushies, fanart, manga, and a million different figures of your 2D crush

when you finally laugh and tell him that this is all just for fun and that you aren’t actually obsessed with your crush, because you know that Jakurai is the only one for you

that’s when Jakurai will relax a little more and try to remind himself that you have it under control

even though he’s definitely still concerned whenever you scream when your 2D crush smiles

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

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kass-storycorner · 3 years

Text

An unpleasant surprise

I should definitely do my coursework instead of writing this fic, however the idea just came into my head and I couldn’t focus until I wrote this down. Writing this took waaaay longer than I anticpiated and it was way more spontanious... so it’s not proof read or anything, still hope you’ll enjoy it.

The idea/prompt: character is secretly in love with you, but won’t tell you because you are already in a relationship with someone else. Character however finds out that your partner is cheating on you – this is how they would react/act upon finding it out

Word count: 3637 Words (I’m sorry)

Character: Kaeya x gn!reader (in this it’s still very platonic and one sided love) Genre: Angst (?), Hurt, Comfort, even a bit of humour but maybe not, idk haha

Content warnings: cheating, threats, mention of blood and a major injury, mentioning of Dilucs and Kaeyas past, but nothing to explicit (tried to avoid the major spoilers)

Format: The first part / backstory is written in bullet points, but at the end you’ll find a fic written in the normal text format

He just wanted to drown his sorrows in peace at the Angel’s Share, but no. He had to be witness to that disgusting display of infidelity of your (hopefully soon to be ex-) boyfriend

Kaeya has known you for several years now, both of you started around the same time in the Knights of Favonius. The early years of your training were some of the most fun times Kaeya had- thinking about it always made him smile. Both of you were known from the beginning as rule benders, mostly breakers, within the Knights and if it weren’t for the influence of Kaeyas adoptive family none of you both would’ve gotten that many chances to stay until each of you proved their own worth without familiar ties.

However, in the last few years you both grew a bit more distant. Kaeya blamed himself entirely for it, after Crepus death he knew he should not have any emotional ties to anyone in Mondstadt, at first he ruined the relationship with his brother by telling him the truth. He then just tried to avoid you more and more, which wasn’t easy, because after Diluc quit his position as a Cavalry Captain Kaeya rose up to his position – only to have you as his subordinate.

It was not until you were on a mission with Kaeya that went horribly wrong, that Kaeya realised his feelings for you never were platonic, he was in love with you since the early days of training.You are his first love.

That mission was more of a secretive one, a few months after Diluc had left Mond and Crepus died, and one of the first bigger outings Kaeya had to lead as a Cavalry Captain. And the first mission without his brother by his side. The dragon Ursa resurfaced and continued to cause harm to the people of Mond, so Grand Master Varka gave Kaeya the responsibility to find that Dragons lair.

Instead of finding the hiding spot of Ursa, Kaeyas troop stumbled into a hiding spot of the, at that point not known as, Abyss order. That was the last time Kaeya went into a mission without information he himself collected and checked, because looking back it was so obviously a trap. How did he not notice it back then?

The fight was brutal and exhausting – somehow it was a miracle that the only Knight dangerously wounded was you. At least that is what the other Knights who were on that mission too would say, thankful that the worst they had to suffer from back then were a few scars at most. Hearing anyone talk about it enraged Kaeya, though he would never show it. It was because you were the most skilled fighter in that troop, even without a Vision Kaeya was sure that at your peak back then you could’ve bested him even now. But because of one of his mistakes, he did not care to watch his own back, maybe because he knew you would protect him, it was you who was injured and not him.

In that moment, seeing you unconscious on the floor laying in your own blood because you protected him, Kaeya understood his feelings for you.

After bringing you back safely to Mondstadt, and you thankfully not dying because of the injuries, Kaeya became even more distant. At first he wished to be able to tell you his true feelings after you’ve woken up, but he just couldn’t. When the healers and doctors gave the news that the injury was so severe that you would never be able to fight again, or even walk down the streets of Mond without being in pain – Kaeya thought the guilt of keeping that secret from Diluc and Crepus for years was unbearable, but the guilt he felt from being responsible for this? It pained him even more.

You stayed in the Knights, taking over administrative tasks and helping every other department of the Knights in the best ways you possibly could.

What surprised Kaeya is that you were never bitter about it. You never said it was Kaeyas fault, even went out of your way to constantly reassure him after you got the news that he shouldn’t blame himself for it (until this day he refuses to listen to you). Your smile and laughter didn’t stop after it, which he never could understand.

How were you able to be so happy and kind when your dream of leading your own troop just – vanished. To travel around Teyvat, see the world. When you weren’t able to do the things, you loved on your own, like going to Windrise to pick some of your favourite flowers.

Somehow, Kaeya thought, it was because of that guy. He never liked your boyfriend to begin with, but Kaeya thought maybe it was his jealousy that clouded his judgement.

He came into your life shortly after the incident and Kaeya remembered the first time he saw you two together – holding hands, you looked so smitten and the way you laughed when he leaned down to whisper something into your ear. After seeing that Kaeya knew he could never have something like this in his life. Not if its not with you.

Kaeya didn’t spend much time with you outside of the Knights anymore, though he would always have a conversation with you when you came up to him or he had to visit your office. Whenever he saw you outside of the Knights, you were always with your boyfriend, sometimes stopping and having a quick chat with Kaeya. Sometimes he wished you would stop being so nice to him.

Now seeing that disgusting piece of shit of a boyfriend sit in the corner of the Angel’s Share, with his hands all over some young thing made Kaeyas blood boil.

How dared he, the man who should be so lucky to have you, have his eyes and hands on another woman.

Also it’s a good thing that Diluc is not at Angel’s Share today, he was also a close friend of you back in the day and even though the friendship with Diluc didn’t survive his three years absence, Diluc would definitely throw that bastard out

Kaeya was astounded by the audacity your boyfriend had. He never had a high opinion of him but seeing that man openly flirt and make out with a woman that was not you, so obvious for everyone to see… in a bar that was frequently visited by your colleagues and friends. If it weren’t for the fact that he was cheating on you Kaeya could maybe muster up some respect for a man who had so clearly a death wish. Eyeing him from the corner of his eye, Kaeya kept observing that situation. How the hands that always held yours in public were touching all over the body of that unknown woman. How the mouth that told you sweet nothings over and over, told you that he loved you, was occupied with kissing the neck of another woman. That whole display just filled Kaeya with disgust. The loud giggles of that woman in his lap filled the Tavern and that was the moment Kaeya decided he had enough. Calmy, he finished his drink, stood up from the bar and made his way over to the table. “You surely don’t mind if I join you two”, Kaeya said in a nonchalant manner, sitting down opposite to the couple. “Oh, Sir Kaeya!”, the young woman giggled, clearly intoxicated, and embarrassed by the way Kaeya eyed the two. Quickly they both shifted, so the woman sat now besides your boyfriend. The way the cheater looked at Kaeya, it was quite amusing. A mix of fear, shock and uneasiness filled the eyes of him. It filled Kaeya with a weird sense of pride, knowing that being caught by him was something that scared him. “Seemed like you two had quite some fun back here”, Kaeya smugly started his interrogation. It was not unusual for Kaeya to use the Angel’s Share as his interrogation room – the casual setting and the alcohol made it so much easier sometimes for people to spill all their secrets. Especially when Kaeya could just be so charming. What Kaeya interested the most was if this was the first offense of the cheater or if that behaviour was a more… regular occurrence. It was at least for him the first time he caught that man red handed. Getting some information out of the girl was quite easy, she was so eager to tell the Cavalry Captain all about the two. Though from what Kaeya gathered the whole thing between her and your boyfriend was quite fresh. “You two really seem like a fitting pair”, Kaeya replied after a long ramble of that woman on how she was just so in love with your boyfriend. His voice sweet and smooth as silk, not showing how the anger inside him grew. It was just not fair, not fair to you. “Hey,” Kaeya began and eyed the empty glasses on the table, looking then back at the woman. “How about another round of drinks, it’s on me. Would you be so kind and go to Charles and order a few?”, again his voice was charming as ever. “No, no, Sir Kaeya, that’s too kind, but another drink won’t be necessary. It is quite late; don’t you think flower? We should get going”, the cheater chimed in and Kaeya nearly lost his cool when he heard him call the woman ‘flower’. Whenever Kaeya met you and him on his patrols around Mondstadt he always heard him call you ‘flower’. Fucking bastard, is all Kaeya could think before the voice of the woman protested the cheaters concerns. “Nooo, just one more round. How can you turn down Sir Kaeya, love? Just one more, please”, she looked at him with pleading eyes and he just sighted. “Fine”, he said and with that the woman was on her way to the bar. Kaeya now hoped that Charles would keep her occupied long enough so he could find out everything he wants to know from that cheater. His eye shifted from the woman who made her way to the bar to your boyfriend who sat directly across Kaeya. Now completely alone and vulnerable, for his shield left his side. The tension in the air seemed to be unbearable, Kaeya could see how uncomfortable the silence and his curious glance made the cheater. But Kaeya knew – sometimes saying nothing says it all. Helplessly your boyfriend looked over to the bar only to see that the woman he was with was now totally engrossed in a conversation with Charles. After a few minutes, that might have felt like hours to that cheater, he broke the silence. “So,” he tried to start a conversation, clearly not knowing that he fell right into Kaeyas trap. “What gives us the honour to be invited by the Cavalry Captain?”. “Oh, I think you might be smart enough to come up with an answer yourself,” Kaeya replied, keeping up a smile. Though the look in Kaeyas eye was just as cold as the top of Dragonspine, causing the other man to shiver. “As much as it honours me that you think of me this highly, I sadly have no idea what would make the renowned Sir Kaeya sit down at my table tonight.” “Oh, so this is how you want have this conversation”, now his voice was just as cold as his look. “I don’t understand what you mean.” ‘Bullshit’, Kaeya thought. “I’ve been just curious about that woman that just sat so prominently on your lap earlier this evening, she seems to be not the same I saw you hold hands with earlier this day.” “As nice at it is that the Cavalry Captain seems concerned for me, it isn’t one of the Knights duties to pry into the lives of citizens, now, is it?” Oh, how confident the cheater now sounded, thinking he was winning that conversation. Kaeya couldn’t deny that the entire situation made him furious and that he handled it a bit differently than he usually would if he were to talk with drunk treasure hoarders. “Oh, we’re awfully bold now, are we? Believe me the Knights don’t care about your infidelity, though I guess a certain one might find it awfully interesting to know how you spend your nights.” There was a short moment of silences between the two men, the tension just rising. “Well, they wouldn’t believe you. But if you want to go and be a telltale go, I won’t stop you”, the man gave as an answer. His words did not fit his body language – bold words, but his body was tense and Kaeya could see the fear behind the eyes of the man. But it was not fear of losing you, no he seemed to be quite confident that this would not happen. Kaeya said nothing, he just looked at that man, piercing him with his ice cold look. “You see”, he continued, “I wouldn’t be sitting here in Angle’s Share with that lovely company if I thought they might believe the words of any low-rank Knight coming in their office, believing their lies. Quite sad what pranks some people want to play on them, don’t you think?” Slowly, but surely, Kaeya understood that this tonight was definitely not the first offense of that man. And he now understood why most of the Knights here tonight just looked away from the scene, not batting an eye at what was going on. Kaeya could kick himself in the ass, how did he not notice the behaviour of that rodent before him earlier? If he was so open about cheating on you that even most of the other Knights knew, how come that he did not? “And I think its just so sad, that one of the people they hold in such high regards would join in on those baseless accusations, don’t you think Sir Kaeya? I mean it would be so disappointing for them to find out that you tell them such a lie, only because you just don’t like me.” If Kaeya wasn’t a Knight, if he weren’t Kaeya right now, if he hadn’t to uphold a certain image… the floor of the Tavern would be painted with the blood of this absolute bastard. Oh, how Kaeya wished he could lose his cool. “If you say it like that, then I guess I won’t tell them a word,” Kaeya replied. “I’m glad you understand”, the cheater smiled, the fear in his eyes now subsided and he seemed to relax a bit. At that Kaeya just leaned forward, his look cold and his voice even colder. “You are telling them.” The man just scoffed, looking confused at Kaeya. “Why should I?” Kaeya now coming closer, his voice more threatening than before. “Do you really want to find out, if you don’t?”. Kaeya leaned back, smiling and at that moment the woman came back with the drinks. The face of the man was just pale as snow, the fear back in his eyes. “Oh, thank you dear”, Kaeya said when she places his drink before him, and he took a sip. If your boyfriend is smarter than he seemed to be after fooling around with that woman in public, it would do him good to do as Kaeya said.

Dealing with the pain in your leg was something you were used to now for a few years, but the pain in your heart today… you somehow would prefer a broken leg over your shattered heart. Your eyes were fixated on the documents before you, though trough the tears in your eyes you could barley make out what they said. What they were even for. How could you ignore it for so long, that he cheated. That he fooled around with any woman in Mondstadt willing to be with him. This sleezy asshole. The tears fell down on the paper, you couldn’t care right now what important piece of documents you ruined with your tears. How, how, how??? Why were you so stupid to believe him when he always said that all the people that came to you with their concerns must have been mistaken. Why did you believe him over and over again. You couldn’t stop thinking about how the first person coming to you was Outrider Amber, so nervous to even say anything. How you just laughed her worries away, saying she definitely was mistaken. How after Amber again and again told you how sure she was. Had you just listened to her. Then maybe you wouldn’t feel so humiliated. If you just hadn’t listened to that damn liar. In that moment you heard a knock on the door. Quickly you wiped your tears away with your sleeves, clearing your throat. “Come in,” you said, though you were shocked at how hoarse you sounded. Stepping into your office was Kaeya, but when he saw your red eyes and tear stained face, he quickly closed the door behind him. “Are you alright?”, he asked in such a soft and kind voice. Since you woke up in the infirmary all those years ago you hadn’t heard him talk in that voice. You couldn’t help it, it made you immediately tear up again. Throwing your head into your hands you just couldn’t stop the uncontrollably sobs that took over you. You didn’t even notice that Kaeya was kneeling beside your chair until he felt his hand on your back. “Hey,” you heard him say, again in this soft voice. “It’s alright, let it out.” And you did. For a while you just sat there, crying and sobbing until you ran empty. The whole time Kaeya was on your side, saying nothing. He was just there and somehow, even after you two grew apart in the past years, after all that happened – Crepus death, Dilucs disappearance and return, your injury. Even after all it did not feel awkward to just cry and look for comfort at his side. After all, you still were friends. Slowly you calmed down, looking up to him. “I was so stupid, Kaeya. So many people came to me, told me what they saw, who he was and I- I just ignored it. I ignored it all, my feelings and-“, you felt the lump in your throat, making you stop speaking. It was just too much. “You’re not stupid,” he said, taking you in his arms. It felt so good to just melt into the hug. Just trying to forget the pain for a few seconds, slipping back into the familiarity of Kaeya you haven’t felt in such a long time.

Kaeya on the other hand couldn’t stop asking himself if what he’s doing here was alright. Was it okay to comfort you, he asked. If he hadn’t basically threatened your, obviously now, ex-boyfriend last night to tell you the truth, he might have been met with your bright smile today and not that painful expression. But it was the right thing to do, you deserved to know. You deserved for that guy to tell you, although he should have told you the truth out of his own free will. Not because Kaeya got involved. “Thank you”, he heard you mumble into his chest. “For what?” he asked, both of you now parting from the hug. “For just… for being here. And for being a friend”, you answered, again wiping tears away. Kaeya couldn’t help himself and chuckled at that statement. A friend, yeah. That is what he was and what he must be fine with. However, he didn’t really expect you to view him as one, after all that happened and how much he tried to avoid you in the past. “Well, I have been an awful friend the last years, haven’t I?”. Your eyes shot up, looking directly into his eye. “No, what makes you think that?”. You genuinely looked surprised at his statement. “Well,” he gestured towards your leg. Before he could even say anything, he felt your hands cup his face and looking at him sternly. “Kaeya Alberich, how often do I have to tell you this. What happened to my leg is not your fault, please stop taking blame for it. It was my choice to join you on that mission.” For a short while you both just looked into each other’s eyes until Kaeya couldn’t stand it anymore, a sigh leaving him, and he looked away. “How come that I want to comfort you and you just end up telling me something I just can’t seem to learn.” He stood up and then he saw it. You smiled at him. A sad smile, but a smile, nonetheless. “One day you’ll hopefully learn it”, you said. “Now, to make up for this”, pointing at your leg, trying to joke, “and for threatening a Mondstadt citizen, I think you should get me something from Good Hunter.” Kaeya was surprised. How did you know? He couldn’t even ask you, you already gave him the answer to the question that was so clearly written all over his face. “He literally begged me, after telling me the truth and breaking up with me, that I made sure you wouldn’t hurt him.” Now Kaeya gave out a small laugh, partially because he felt a bit embarrassed by you knowing, but also the thought of that arrogant asshole being so afraid of him amused Kaeya. “And, what did you tell him”, he asked, now back with his more playful tone. “Mmmmmh, I told him I’ll think about it.”

#genshin impact fan fiction #genshin #genshin fan fiction #kaeya x reader #kaeya fanfiction #genshin angst #kaeya angst #genshin hurt #genshin comfort #how do you tag fan fiction help #reader insert #gender-neutral reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact #genshin x reader #angst #hurt #comfort #kaeya alberich

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scxrlettwxtches · 3 years

Text

love me, love me not | bang chan

genre: angst, humor, fluff, college!au, female!reader

warnings: slight swearing, not edited ahhh

prompt: argument leading kissing

description: when chan rejected you, you never expected that it would become the catalyst for your love story, rather than the end of it. but, life and a few welcome matchmakers have a way of playing with fate.

word count: ~6.5k+

a/n: hi, anon! im so so sorry for the wait. i totally had a writer’s block while writing this, and im super sorry if this isn’t exactly what you wanted...i tweaked the prompt ever so slightly, but i hope you still like it! >.< it’s also wayyy longer than i’d predicted haha oops. as always, my ask box is open if anyone wants to be friends! love you all! <3

It took a total of three days and five hours for Chan to realize he might've fucked up.

When the thought first appeared in his head, he dismissed it out of indignation. How could it have been his fault?! He didn't know you were going to confess. He didn't know he was hurting you by jumping around from girl to girl.

"You... you're what?" Chan stuttered, his pace faltering to a stop as he tried to process your words.

"I'm in love with you," you repeated, stopping in your tracks as you turned to face him, your hands gripping the straps of your backpack tightly.

"I have been for years," you said plainly, looking into his eyes with a simple gaze.

Chan stammered, and for the first time, his mouth worked before his brain and he blurted out the stupidest response he could've conjured up, "I already have a date tonight."

You flinched as if he’d slapped you hard across the face, showing visible hurt at his careless words. You were always the collected one, always the person that could flash a smile even in the most uncomfortable circumstances. It felt weird, uncomfortable even to see you waver.

When you replied to him, you had already recovered, your face passive and your voice steady, "I know. I helped you set it up, dipshit," you said with a dry smile.

"Then, why would you say this now?" Chan felt churlishly ungrateful. How dare you tell him now? Right when he finally scored that girl he'd been secretly pining after for days. It had taken so much effort, and you'd know because it was only through your shared internship with her that this date even became possible.

Oh, he was being so callous, so insensitive. And yet, you showed nothing more than a flash of hurt in your eyes, a sign he had clearly missed while he was too busy worrying about himself.

“Because you asked me if I liked anyone, and I didn’t have any reason to lie to you,” you shrugged indifferently before checking your watch, “Oh, you’re going to be late. I’ll walk the rest of the way by myself.”

And without waiting for another response from him, you turned on your heels and walked down your street without the one companion you’ve had all your life. It was lonelier than you thought it would be.

Ever since that day, Chan’s relationship with you had irrevocably changed. He still saw you every day, still walked you to your classes and spent his lunch period with you at the nearby cafe, but a large chasm had opened in your relationship, a divide of unspeakable topics after you’d so bluntly confessed to him and unknowingly sent him into an existential crisis.

“How was the date?”

Speaking of the devil, Chan choked on his chocolate milkshake as you interrupted his thoughts, "I'm sorry, what did you say?" he wheezed, hitting his chest to catch his breath.

You gave him a strange look, clearly sensing his discomfort, but making no moves to resolve the situation as you looked back down at your notes.

“I asked how the date was,” you repeated, scribbling as you jotted down some of the main points from your textbook, “Didn’t you have one? Two days ago?”

“O-oh, right,” Chan nodded, clearing his throat deliberately, “Yeah, it was good, I guess.”

Truthfully, Chan did not remember the date very well. What was her name? Miyeon? Mina? Fuck, was he suffering from early memory loss already? She was quite pretty; he remembered how she looked very vaguely, dressed in a prim and proper manner and carrying herself with grace.

And yet, the one thing that Chan clearly did remember was that he felt nothing.

There was no spark. No instant realization that the girl before him was the one. No dramatic eye contact or k-drama OST to make up for awkward silences.

All in all, it seemed like it was another fail.

You sensed his dejected mood as always, and nudged his still hand on the table, “Hey, it’s alright. Not all dates are supposed to go well. You’re bound to have a few misses.”

“That’s the thing! It hasn’t been just a few misses! It’s been all misses!” Chan bemoaned as he let his head slump onto the table, and he couldn’t ignore the wry smile that crossed your face.

“You just haven’t found the right person yet, and that’s okay,” you chuckled, petting his soft hair. Chan let out an appreciative hum, his eyes automatically closing at the soothing sensation. Your hands felt nice, your pets were always comforting. It would be even better if you’d run your hands through his hair while he--

Wait, what?

Chan shook his head quickly, messing up his soft hair and causing you to pull away, much to his disappointment. What was that? His brain was traveling a mile a minute and the image that flashed in his head--his head on your lap, peaceful and domestic as you pressed kisses to his face while you carded your fingers through his hair--

“Oh, by the way. I’m going on a date tomorrow.”

It was like his dream shattered before his very eyes as you glanced at your nails, the scratching off another fleck of your black nail polish. Chan was genuinely caught off guard by the weird, sickly emotion in his gut as the words you uttered finally processed through his thick brain.

“W-what?” Chan failed to hide the surprise, but he somehow managed to hide the faint sense of disappointment. He shouldn't feel that, right? Friends should always support one another! Friends should always want them to be happy and find someone, right?

He didn't exactly feel those two things at the moment, and the guilt only added to the sickly feeling.

"Who?" Chan asked, trying not to sound bitter.

If you heard the unusual emotion in his voice--which you probably did--you didn't comment on it, "It's the school dance captain, Minho? He asked me out yesterday."

An image of the unfairly handsome, sharp-eyed, dashing dance captain, Lee Minho, appeared in Chan's head. He was the perfect man, of course. Literally Adonis of the modern age. Chan didn’t even know that you and him were friends, much less close enough to schedule dates.

“How do you know him? You’re not exactly the cream of the crop when it comes to dance, or anything physical for that matter--ow!”

You rolled your eyes as you pulled your hand back, watching as he rubbed his forehead dramatically, “We have computer science together, asshole. And he’s a good friend of Jisung.”

“Everyone’s a good friend of Jisung’s,” Chan muttered under his breath, still reeling from your harsh attack, “Why does it have to be Minho?”

He hadn’t planned on you catching his latter question, but seeing the raise of your eyebrow and the immediate change in expression to something slightly more guarded, you asked, “Oh? And what’s wrong with Minho?”

Chan stiffened at the defensive question, feeling his blood grow hot. Of course there wasn’t anything wrong with Minho. He was surprisingly warm-hearted, smart, funny, and a phenomenal dancer. There was nothing wrong with him, and yet, Chan felt a red hot jealousy and anger bubble out of his lips as he blurted out:

“I just don’t want you going with him.”

Oh, that came out wrong. That came out so very wrong.

“And who are you to tell me what to do, Christopher Bang?” your voice was cold and closed off, using his full name as you only did when you were furious.

Chan flinched at your tone, feeling more hurt than he thought he would. But, at the same time, he bristled in frustration. You didn’t understand what he was feeling. (He didn’t understand it either.)

“He’s not good for you, Y/N,” he lied, avoiding your piercing gaze as you scoffed.

“Oh?” you sounded rightfully furious, absolutely fed up with the constant back and forth and utter indecisiveness that was Bang Christopher Chan, “And who exactly do you think is good for me? You?”

It was scathing, meant to hurt, and hurt it did. Chan recoiled at your burning words, “That’s not what I meant!” He snapped defensively, his temper rising unusually as your argument began to draw the attention of other customers in the cafe.

Your hands shook as you clenched them into little fists, “Then what did you mean, huh?” You asked softly, eyes lowered to the table.

Chan opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out as he struggled to dictate exactly what he was feeling. What even was this? This burning pain in his heart at the thought of you with another, this fear in his mind that he will no longer be your first priority?

You took his silence as acceptance, and you scoffed, trying to ignore the prickly feeling behind your eyes, “I see,” you spoke with an air of finality, and before Chan could speak, you pushed out of your seat, beginning to walk away.

“W-wait!” Chan’s motion was frantic and unthought of as he grabbed the edge of your soft cardigan.

“Channie, it’s fine,” you said simply as you refused to face him, and he was unable to see your expression. Your voice gave nothing away, perfectly neutral and closed off.

“This isn’t goodbye or anything, dipshit,” you continued, standing still as you spoke, “I just have something I have to do. Text me when you need me.”

With that, you yanked your arm away, and the fabric of your sweater slipped through his fingers. Chan was frozen in his position, half ready to stand up and half still sitting. It wasn’t a goodbye, he told himself. You said it yourself. It wasn’t a goodbye.

But why did it feel so much like one?

“You’re thinking about her, aren’t you?”

Chan looked away from the window, his eyes wide and startled as the woman in front of him gave him a merciful smile as she rested her head on her hand, watching him inquisitively.

“So you are,” she confirmed, absently twirling the pasta around her fork as she continued to study him.

Chan felt his face flush with shame and guilt. It had been almost a whole day since your fight with him, and--unable to study because of it--he decided to drown his sorrow the only way he knew how: by setting up another date. He called the girl he went out with two days ago, Mina, and to his utmost surprise, she agreed to a second date.

But now, Chan was sure that the chance of a third was completely out the window, especially since he was spending much of this date daydreaming.

“I-I’m so sorry,” he stuttered out an apology, and truthfully, he was ashamed that his mind wouldn’t stay in one place no matter how much he willed it to, “I’ve just been really busy with work, a-and it’s been weighing down on me.”

Mina smiled at that, a gentle, knowing smile that send to pierce through all of Chan’s clumsy excuses, “I see. So it wasn’t about anyone in particular?”

Chan felt his heart jump in panic. This was probably one of the most mortifying moments in his life, “I don’t believe so?” He said in a questioning tone as he stabbed at his ravioli, playing with it more than he was actually eating.

Even as he lied, his thoughts travelled to another date that was supposed to be happening right as this time. He’d heard through the grapevines that you were going to a cute dinner date with Minho on the other side of town. The two of you haven’t spoken at all since the fallout, which was very uncommon. Not a single text, call, or meeting was exchanged.

Chan wanted to tear his hair out from the frustration. How was it? Were you having fun on your date? Was Minho treating you well? Of course, he would; that was a stupid question. Minho was always known to treat his dates well, even if they didn’t turn into anything long term. He was just kind like that, and--at this moment--he was definitely doing a much better job making you happy than Chan was.

“Hm,” the girl mused carefully, twirling her fork a couple more times before asking innocently, “Are you sure you’re not thinking about your friend, Y/N?”

Jackpot. Chan’s eyes grew comically wide as he choked in his fancy ravioli dish, his face turning red as he quickly tried to drown his throat with water so he didn’t die from asphyxiation, “Y/N?” he stammered, and the image of you from the last time you spoke with him--your face of hurt and betrayal as he snapped at you for no reason at all--flashed in his brain, making him feel yet another coil of burning hot guilt.

Mina nodded serenely, eating as she watched you carefully, “So, I was right?” She asked knowingly, and Chan wondered how long it’s been she’d figured it out.

Nevertheless, he winced and dipped his head respectfully, “I am very sorry,” he said solemnly, and he truly was sorry, “I just...we had a falling out yesterday, and I’m just worried that I might’ve accidentally lost a friend.”

“Oh? Was it that bad of a falling out?” Mina asked, and Chan was almost dumbfounded by how casual his date was at the notion of him thinking about another person during their dinner.

But at the same time, he’d been aching for someone to confide in, aching to sort out the jumbled mess inside his heart, “It was bad,” he admitted, “She was trying to tell me that she got a date, and instead of being happy for her, I sort of blew up in her face.”

“Oh. So it’s bad.”

The blatant honesty was enough to make Chan put his head in his hands, “Yeah, it was bad. Looking back, I’m surprised she didn’t get even more angry at me.”

Mina let out a soft chuckle at his self deprecating words, which made Chan felt just slightly better, “Why did you get so angry?”

Chan blinked, looking up at the question, “H-huh?” If anything, he’d expected Mina to get angry, not for her to start questioning him like a lawyer.

“I mean,” Mina continued, shrugging as she sipped at her champagne, “is Minho a bad person?”

“Not at all. He’s a great guy,” Chan said, almost immediately getting defensive. Minho was a great guy, and he deserved someone wonderful by his side. Someone like you.

“Do you think he and Y/N won’t get along?”

“No!” Chan huffed, growing frustrated by the interrogation but also understanding that he was the one at fault here for ruining a perfectly nice date.

“Then why did you get angry?”

Chan opened his mouth to speak, but as obvious as the reason seemed to be just then, he couldn’t actually pinpoint a direct reason. Why was he so angry? Why was he angry at the prospect of you being happy? Was it because he was just a bad person?

Or, was it because you were going to be happy with someone other than him?

Mina smiled slyly as she watched the poor, unknowingly besotted boy come to one of the most important revelations of his college life, “Well?” She asked, tilting her head expectantly.

Chan swallowed, and his palms felt unnaturally sweaty, as if he were about to perform with his friends on stage. The very thought of it scared him a little, not because it was so undesirable of an outcome, but because of the growing guilt that he didn’t realize it before, and the prospect of fulling understanding how much pain his obliviousness might have caused you.

“I was angry because I wanted it to be me,” he whispered, softly enough that he hoped Mina wouldn’t hear it, but from her smile, she definitely did.

“You wanted to be Minho?” she clarified, almost relishing in the way she was forcing Chan to cough up the buried feelings hidden so deep inside his heart that even he himself wasn’t aware of them.

Chan nodded, feeling as if the ground had been pulled out from under him again, but this time, it was a light, airy feeling rather than a terrifying plummet.

There was a moment of silence before Mina suddenly began to giggle, covering her mouth with the back of her hand. Chan looked up, flustered by her actions as he felt his face burn. He was still a little nervous that he’d insulted her by basically confessing to be in love with another person on their date.

“Oh, you’re actually adorable,” Mina smiled, wiping at the corners of her eyes before she took a deep breath, “Do you know, the first time we went on a date, a couple days ago, I actually thought you were cheating on Y/N.”

“W-what?” Chan sputtered, his cheeks growing bright red at the very thought, “Why?”

“Well, I’ve seen the two of you around, and your relationship is almost a known secret around campus,” Mina explained, “Especially once when I saw the two of you at a cafe studying together, and the way you were looking at her...it made even my heart flutter just watching you stare at her. I doubt you were even listening to what she was saying.”

Chan thought back to your study sessions, thought back to every time he’d have you explain a difficult equation or problem. Bizarrely, he didn’t remember a single concept at all, but he did remember everything about you as you were speaking. The way a single strand of hair traced your face and you always had to brush it behind your ear. The way you’d pout if the question stumped you, too. The way you’d sometimes get lost in your own explanation and start talking about a topic so high level that Chan had been lost for minutes already, but he couldn’t bear to stop you because you looked so adorable.

Oh, shit.

“Then,” Chan swallowed nervously, “you agreed to go on that date with me because you thought I was cheating on her?”

“Well, first off, she helped put us together, which diminished the possibility of that being true,” Mina shrugged, continuing to eat, “Also, if it was true, then I’d be able to catch you right in the act and tell her directly.”

Chan felt a little ashamed and unfairly blamed. Of course he wouldn’t cheat on you! He’d never cheat on anyone, much less you of all people. The very notion of hurting you in such a way was practically unbearable.

“But, as we talked that night,” the girl continued nonchalantly, “it became clear to me that the two of you weren’t together, but you also were totally oblivious to how in love with her you are.”

The back of Chan’s throat was completely dry at this point, despite the copious amount of water he’d been chugging throughout this date, “I-I’m not in love with her,” he stammered defensively, “We’ve been best friends for years!”

Mina leveled him an unamused glare, “Oh? You’re not in love with her, but you feel pain at the notion of her being with someone else. You’re not in love with her, but you can only remember every good thing about her. You’re not in love with her, but you look at her as if she’s your whole sun, moon and earth combined.”

Chan felt cornered, his eyes wide at the revelation as he choked out, “B-but if I love her, t-then all this time--haven’t I been hurting her over and over?”

“How so?”

“S-she confessed earlier this week--b-but I didn’t know!” Chan said helplessly, beginning to panic. If this was all true--and slowly, his mind was beginning to process that it very well could be--then he’s caused you unimaginable pain for no good reason. Then he’d rejected you in the most brutal, uncaring way possible.

Mina sighed, rubbing her eyes, “Oh, dear god. You’re actually an idiot. What are you doing here? Go apologize! Don’t turn up empty handed. And don’t expect anything from her. Just ask her sincerely for her forgiveness.”

Chan nodded, already scrambling out of his seat and fumbling as he placed a few big bills on the table, “I’m so so sorry about this,” the apologies spilled out as he bowed respectfully towards Mina, “If there’s anything I can do to make it up to you…”

“Just don’t be an idiot and try to date the entire student population when the one for you is right beside you,” she retorted dryly, smiling at him, “And good luck.”

Chan ran faster than he ever had before. He ran faster than when his high school class had made him the final runner in the school relay. He ran faster than when he was late to his first job offer in his second year of college. None of those things felt nearly as important as this: the notion of losing you for good.

He rushed to the flower shop that you always spared forlorn glances at, but never spent money on. Apologizing profusely for barging in right before closing time, he bought a small bouquet of your favorite flowers, a collection of roses, lilies, and orchids.

Oh gosh, what if you weren’t home? What if you didn’t come home for the night, but rather stayed with Minho? The very thought caused his stomach to turn.

By the time he made it to your house, his lungs were burning and gasping for air as he rushed to your door. His heart plummeted as he glanced through the window and saw that none of the lights were on, but nevertheless, he pressed your doorbell urgently.

Of course, there was the possibility of saying sorry tomorrow, or saying sorry the day after, but for Chan, they didn't seem like options at all. He had to tell you now, beg for your forgiveness now. If not, he had a feeling that everything between the two of you would be unsalvageable.

No, no, no! You weren't home. Chan peeked into the window again, but the inside was pitch black. You should've been done with your date by now. You should be home, but you weren't. Chan’s heart was racing with fear as he fumbled for his phone. What if calling you made it worse? Oh god, what should he even do?

He just couldn't lose you. Not as a friend, not as a soulmate. He didn't care if he lost his chance with you, he needed you by his side. He needed to see you, he had to fix things—

“Channie?”

Whirling around, his heart seemed to falter as he saw you standing on the street, looking at him with a confused expression. With the dim street light behind you, Chan swore at that moment, you looked like an angel. You were so pretty, dressed up for your date with your hair half up. He swallowed his pride, his guilt, his fear, and he walked towards you clutching the bouquet in his hands.

“You’re thinking about him, aren’t you?”

Your eyes widened a fraction as you glanced to the side, where Minho was currently walking with you around the pier. His jacket was draped over your frame, even though the night was only slightly breezy, and you relished its weight on your shoulders.

Still, your expression dropped at his question, “I don’t want to talk about him today, Minho.”

“Why not?” He asked, looking around at the sun slowly setting behind the vast ocean as the sky was colored with vibrant reds, purples, and blues.

“Because we’re not exactly on good terms right now,” you muttered, looking down, “Also, isn’t this supposed to be our date? How are you so comfortable with the idea that I’m thinking about someone else?”

Minho laughed, turning to gaze at you fondly, “Well, I can’t exactly change the way you think, can I?” he smiled, ruffling your hair and making you complain with a loud whine, “So the best I can do is to help you get through it.”

You fought the smile tugging at the corner of your lips, and you gently squeezed Minho’s hand, feeling touched, “Thanks.”

“Whatever, dork,” Minho rolled his eyes, “So what happened? Did that idiot say something stupid again?”

“Sort of.”

“Y/N, you are being really unhelpful,” he frowned at your vague answers.

“It was just confusing,” you finally confessed. You’d barely gotten a wink of sleep that night, Chan’s words, his outburst of anger, replaying in your head like a broken record. Why was he so angry? Hadn’t he told you flat out that he had absolutely no feelings for you, crushing your dim light of hope so completely that you’d secretly sobbed your eyes out after walking home?

“Well, if it was confusing for you, I’m sure Chan was just as confused with himself,” Minho chuckled dryly, “What did he say?”

“He...was visibly upset. About this,” you gestured to you and Minho in a helpless manner, almost begging for some sort of clarification.

“Ah, this. You mean us two?” Minho asked, stopping at an empty bench along the pier and deciding to sit down. After all, the two of you had been walking for the latter half of the hour, trying to digest the delicious lunch he’d treated you to.

“Yeah, said something about not liking me being with you, or whatever bullshit he was spitting that day,” you muttered, feeling your blood grow hot just thinking about it.

“Wait, he said that? Chan?” Minho fought the urge to laugh as he tried to make sure he was picturing the scenario correctly. His plan was going better than he’d expected, and Chan had fallen into it without even being slightly aware of it.

You nodded, kicking your feet back and forth as you rolled your eyes, “It was ridiculously uncalled for. You didn’t do anything that warranted that sort of reaction.”

“I can be a bit of a sleeze when I try to be,” Minho pointed out, chuckling when you lightly punched his arm, “So, he said I wasn’t good for you. What’s the big deal? He’s probably just being protective, right?”

“He’s always protective, this was different,” you shook your head. Chan was always the self-sacrificing, putting other people before himself type. He was inherently protective of you just by the virtue of being your friend, whether that meant walking you home every night or trying to make sure that you didn’t forget to eat meals. But that, the anger and almost fear that you felt from him, it felt too raw to just be his protective instinct.

“How so?”

You hesitated before elaborating, “Well, it felt almost like...he was jealous, but that’s ridiculous.”

Minho had to contain the almost giddy laughter that threatened to bubble out from his chest. You two were so oblivious, he felt like a conniving witch trying to put the two of you together. And boy, was he enjoying it.

“Why would it be ridiculous?” he asked innocently.

You leveled a glance at him, immediately sensing something strange about his tone, but not quite being able to identify it, “Of course it’s ridiculous. He rejected me earlier this week.”

“Wait. What the fuck?” Minho snapped, sitting upright immediately, almost like a cat that heard something dangerous nearby, “He rejected you? Outright?”

“Is there something called a lowkey rejection?” You laughed bitterly, “Yes, he full on rejected me. I told him I loved him and he just said he had a date that night.”

Suddenly, this game was significantly less fun. Minho wanted to jab his own eyes out in frustration before going to jab Chan’s eyes out for being so fucking stupid. You confessed, you literally told him outright that you loved him, and he was still stupid enough not to realize his own feelings?! What was it going to take? A good ol’ bonk to the head?

“Okay, Y/N. I’m going to drive you home right now,” he said seriously, and you turned to him, almost alarmed by how urgent his tone sounded.

“Um, why? Did something happen?” You asked, glancing at him in concern.

Minho shook his head, “Nothing, it’s just Chan being a fucking idiot and screwing everything up again.”

Your eyes narrowed, “What are you talking about?”

“Chan loves you,” Minho said, plain and simple, sending your head spinning as you tried to process the three simple words.

In the end, all you could do was laugh, a harsh, bitter sound as you rolled your eyes, “Very funny, Minho. Unfortunately, it’s not a very well thought out prank. He already told me otherwise.”

“He doesn’t even know it, goddamnit!” Minho spit out and you jumped at his aggressiveness, “Look, Y/N. I know this sounds crazy, and I know why you’d probably think I’m just being mean. But it’s true. I know it is. Chan loves you.”

Feeling unfairly placed on the spot, you lashed out at him, a sneer across your face as you retorted, “Oh? How are you so sure, huh? If he loves me oh so much, why is he going on a date with another girl for the twentieth time?”

“Because he’s a fucking idiot, okay?!” Minho groaned, running a hand through his hair, “Y/N, he’s probably beside himself with guilt right now, and I bet you he’s finally come to the realization himself.”

You scoffed bitterly, “That’s a bit late, don’t you think?”

“It is,” Minho agreed, wanting nothing more than to smack Chan’s forehead for being such an idiot. He glanced at you, his expression growing softer as he asked, “But you still love him, don’t you?”

“I shouldn’t, right?” Your voice was shaky as you laughed, feeling the green monster of envy and jealousy coil in your gut as you thought about all the times Chan had unknowingly broken your heart, and all you could do was cheer him on.

“It’s stupid, idiotic, unreasonable,” you continued, kicking your heels against the pavement as you glared at the ground so hard that you were probably burning holes into the cement, “and a waste of my fucking time.”

“You can’t force yourself to feel differently,” Minho pointed out, lowering his temper along with you as he spoke softly, “None of us can. If we could, why would unrequited love or affairs happen?”

“When did you get so wise, Aristotle?” You scoffed, fighting a smile as you ruffled his hair.

Minho swatted away your hands, “I’m trying to be serious here. Look, I bet you Chan is at your front door right now with a bouquet of flowers, anxiously wanting to apologize to you. I would bet ten dollars on it.”

“Oh, yeah?” Your smile was almost predatorial, never shying away from a chance to make some fast cash, “Seriously?”

Minho’s smile faltered ever so slightly, and he hoped to whatever god who was listening that Chan was actually getting his fucking act together, “Hell yeah.”

You grinned, shaking his hand as you laughed, “You’re an idiot.”

“Whatever. Now let’s head back to the car so I can collect my ten dollars.”

Your dumb smile faded as you stepped out of the car in front of your driveway, eyes widening as you caught sight of a familiar figure standing on your porch. It couldn’t be. But yet, if your eyes weren’t playing yet another cruel joke on you, it was indeed your best friend, frantically knocking on the door with a bouquet of flowers in the other.

How could this be? How could he have done everything that Minho had predicted? Wasn’t he supposed to be on a date?

All the doubts, the questions, and the fears bubbled over as his name got caught in your throat, “Channie?”

For a moment, Chan genuinely thought that you were merely a figment of his imagination. Why would you be here? Especially with Minho standing beside his car a little ways away and with his jacket draped over your shoulders. Why had you returned?

His eyes widened as you walked closer, and the glow of the lamp light shifted in accordance to your movements. You were real. You were looking at him, albeit with a hint of caution laced with concern, but you were here.

“Channie, what are you doing out here?” You asked, and his heart began to pound with fear and guilt. You were worried about him. Even after everything he put you through, you still cared about his wellbeing.

Your eyebrows furrowed at his lack of response, and you walked cautiously closer, “Chan? Chris? Are you okay--eek!”

Chan’s feet grew a mind of their own, and he rushed towards you in a fit of desperation, crashing into you as he wrapped his arms tightly around your shoulders. It was a bit of an awkward position, since Chan was much bigger than you, but he managed to bury his face in the crook of your neck, hugging you as if it was his last chance.

If you weren’t concerned before, you certainly were now. Chan was never the clingy one. Yes, he liked cuddles and he never shied away from a good hug, but he was never like this, holding onto you for dear life.

“Chan, what’s happened? Gosh, you’re freezing. Why are you out here in the cold--” you froze as your ears perked up to what Chan was mumbling, repeating like a mantra.

He was apologizing.

“I’m so sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry--” He whimpered, his fingers tightening around your coat as he hugged you tightly, “Please, forgive me. I was so stupid. I didn’t know.”

You sighed, and you felt the residual bitterness bleed out of your body. Of course you knew Chan wasn’t purposely being malicious, and if it ate him up with guilt so much that he waited by your door to apologize, then that was enough punishment for you to be more than satisfied.

“Channie, I need you to look at me, okay?” You instructed with a hint of sternness, trying to pull away in order to face him. Chan shook his head, but complied all the same, pulling away from the safety of your arms in order to look at you.

Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted Minho rolling his eyes as he got back in his car, mouthing the words “don’t fuck it up again.” Chan grimaced in affirmation. He didn’t plan on it; not in a million years would he ever want to hurt you again.

You gave him a small smile as he finally met your gaze, “Good boy,” you praised, and Chan was unfamiliar with the tremor in his body that your words caused. When was the last time he’d gotten that from anyone? Oh right, it always came from you. Words of affirmation always came from you, and you always knew when he needed it.

The apologies clawed their way up his throat until he could no longer stay silent.

“I’m so sorry--a-about yesterday,” he sniffled, his shoulders trembling as he hiccuped, “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I didn’t mean to be overbearing. I-I just--I realized how stupidly jealous I was about the whole situation, a-and I didn’t want you to leave me…”

You sighed, reaching up to pet his hair gently, “It's okay, I forgive you,” you said simply, and you did forgive him. There wasn't any point in holding it over his head like you were better than him, “Everyone says stupid things they don't mean, and you had a bad date the night before.”

Chan stared at you, his eyes glossy with unshed tears as he unabashedly admired your beautiful face, your kind eyes, your perfectly kissable lips. He shouldn’t be thinking about this. You were clearly giving him a way out. “Stupid things they don’t mean,” was what you called it.

But he meant them. He was truly jealous. And it wasn’t the right emotion to feel, but they were real. He wanted you. He wanted you beside him.

He shouldn’t be greedy. He shouldn’t bite off more than he deserved to have. It was a miracle in itself that you were willing to forgive him. But at the same time, Chan knew you were as lonely as he was. He wanted to try and fill that hole for you, damned the consequences.

And just like that, Chan made up his mind.

“W-what if I meant it?” He blurted out, studying your face for any micro expression you could give off that indicated you were uncomfortable.

Instead, you looked only puzzled, “Meant what?”

“I was jealous,” he confessed plainly, stepping just a hair closer, and to his astonishment, you didn’t back away. You allowed him into your personal space, slowly and cautiously.

“Why in the world would you be jealous?” You asked softly, ever so perceptive, “It’s not like you love me or anything.”

Chan winced at the reminder of his hurtful words, but he couldn’t avoid them. He could only make up for them by proving that he was an idiot, that he actually loves you so, so much, “I spent all my time trying to find my perfect other half,” he whispered, his words only meant for your ears.

“I was always looking, always feeling incomplete. But, maybe I was looking in the wrong place,” he said, slowly reaching his hand up to cup your cheek. He could practically count your eyelashes he was so close.

“Maybe, the reason I could never find them was because they were beside me the entire time,” he finished cautiously, his thumb brushing against your soft cheek. You let out a soft, shaky breath, and for a moment, Chan feared that he’d ruined everything all over again.

“You’re an idiot, you know that?” You said finally, but Chan felt like almost sobbing with relief as you leaned into his touch. Acceptance. Tentative, but true.

Chan smiled, “That’s because you have all the braincells in this relationship, my dear,” he said solemnly, and his heart fluttered as you giggled. Ah fuck, he really was in love with you.

“I’m sorry for all the pain I’ve caused you,” he said again, holding you close as his forehead rested against yours, “I’m not at all experienced with this...dating thing, but I’ll make it up to you. I’ll make everything up to you. I’ll make you happy. I promise.”

You chuckled softly, and let your eyes flutter shut, “We can both learn along the way,” you said before your lips were pressed gently against his, and Chan’s brain quite literally short circuited. the kiss was chaste, innocent, gentle, and it swept him away like the warmest ocean breeze. He wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you ever closer.

That’s right, both of you had all the time in the world to learn. And everything would be alright, as long as you did it together.

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