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#and then i tried to make something at least of my task. to like define functions and stuff

asahicore · 9 months

Text

love calculator - pjh (m)

this work contains smut - minors please do not interact

pairing. best friend!jihoon x fem!reader

synopsis. You were sure that Jihoon only took care of you so well because your brother had tasked him with looking after you when you started university, so you tried not to read too much into his actions until you couldn't deny your increasing sensitivity around your best friend anymore. What you didn't know was Jihoon was going crazy, finding ways to make his feelings for you more obvious than they already were.

genre. f2l, brother's friend, slight childhood friends action, college au, slow burn?, fluff, smut (mutual first time, they do it raw, dirty talking, very soft dom!jihoon)

warnings. jihoon is a menace, jihoon has a hot bod, junkyu is mean to everyone, mc is a bit slow, side romance but i dont actually ship idols i have a life, omegle, ok theres no actual stuff to be warned about its all good in there

word count. 28.2k dont ask me why or how idk either

a/n. there she is... i spent SO much time on her pls love it lots or i'll cry.. it was sm fun writing for jihoon omg i hope u love hoonyn as much as i do !!! @zreamy my dear sweet little zo ty for betareading this and freaking out over jihoon u rock

1K follower trope event - requested by @mosviqu, tysm for requesting and i really hope u enjoy it !!!! - listen to the playlist!

Oddly enough, it was Jihoon’s biceps that first made you think something was wrong with you.

It was the fourth week of the spring semester, that odd in-between when you knew midterms were creeping up but were still far away enough to be ignored. This meant that you could party guilt-free.

The plan for tonight was to pregame at one of those huge uni dorms where ten students shared a kitchen then head to an overpriced club downtown that always had the best music on Friday nights. You didn’t have any classes on Fridays, so you’d headed to Jihoon’s place around four p.m. to get ready together. Usually, that was something you’d do with Minjeong, your roommate, but that weekend, she was away for an excursion with her Geography course.

He was in the shower when you rang the doorbell, so his flatmate let you in, and you made yourself comfortable on his bed while waiting for him. You were so engrossed in the romance Webtoon you’d started that morning that at first, when he came in, you didn’t even look up from your phone.

“Hey, Y/N,” he said casually, unfazed by your sudden appearance in his room. The soft smell of his body wash filled the room, and you noted with smugness that it was the one you had jokingly given him for Christmas after you’d gotten fed up with his strong, ever-present Axe scent.

“Hey, Hoonie. You smell nice. For once.”

He chuckled. “It’s all thanks to you.”

“What would you do without me?” you said with a sigh, then looked up. You shouldn’t have. “Oh.”

The sight you were met with was unlike anything you’d ever seen in real life - Jihoon in all his post-shower half-naked glory, a simple white towel hanging low on his hips. Small beads of water fell from his hair and dripped down his chiseled chest and onto the plush carpet lining his bedroom.

You were pretty sure you’d seen at least five scenes like this in your romance comics.

“Oh?” he parroted.

You squinted your eyes at your friend before turning your attention back to your phone. “You’re naked.”

From the corner of your eye, you saw his grin widen. “I’m wearing a towel.”

“A towel isn’t clothes.” He turned around to rummage through his closet, and you took that opportunity to observe him more closely. This was the first time you saw your friend without a shirt, and you were trying your very hardest to not freak out, but it was a bit hard not to. Who would have known that under his baggy shirts and sweaters, Jihoon was hiding firm abs, broad shoulders, defined back muscles and protruding biceps?

His arms were what really got you, because you felt like you should have noticed them before. You’d already caught yourself staring a little bit too hard at the veins on his hands and forearms during a lecture before, so you could’ve conjectured that the upper part of his arms was well-defined as well. As mesmerizing as the shifting of his shoulder muscles was, what you really couldn’t look away from was the bump that formed his bicep.

“Jihoon, have you always had… arms?”

You had barely even realized you’d said this out loud until Jihoon turned around, a confused look on his face. His lips drew into a smirk when he saw how fixed your gaze on his biceps was.

“No, they just grew recently. Thank you for noticing.”

“No, I mean… arms. Muscles.”

“Oh, these?” he said, flexing his arms and pecking his biceps in such a cheesy way that it snapped you out of your reverie and made you burst into laughter. “I started working on them last year so, yeah, they’ve been around a while.”

“Huh,” you said, then picked your phone up again and resumed your reading. “Well, you should work harder, ‘cause it’s the first time I noticed them.”

Jihoon scoffed. “Don’t act like you weren’t just drooling over my dream bod just seconds ago.”

You looked up, outraged. “I wasn’t drooling, I was observing. And don’t call it a dream bod, that’s gross.”

“My bod is a dream bod.”

“Stop it.”

“Can you look away from my dream bod for a sec? I need to put some pants on.”

“I’m already actively not looking. This dude is way hotter than you, by the way,” you said, waving your phone.

“Let me see him,” Jihoon said, heading towards you after successfully putting a shirt and sweatpants on. Gray sweatpants, you realized with a frown. He took your phone and looked back and forth between the character on the screen and you, an expression of disbelief on his face. “Y/N, this is a two-dimensional fictional character that exists in a fairyland. It hurts my feelings when you call him hotter than me.”

A lip grew on your lips. “Yes, but he has pointy ears and doesn’t refer to his body as a dream bod, so he’s a ten in my books.”

As you spoke, Jihoon lay down on his bed, stretching his arms behind his head and resting it on his palms, looking up at you with a grin. You didn’t know what to make of the sudden flip of your stomach.

“Will I be a ten in your books if I stop calling it a dream bod?”

You laughed. “Dream bod doesn’t even sound real anymore.”

“I don’t think it ever was, to be honest,” Jihoon replied, laughing along. “Or maybe they invented it for me.”

After that riveting discussion, you watched the show you’d been watching together (which, you had been surprised to find, Jihoon had the discipline to not watch ahead for), then finished getting ready. That night out hadn’t been particularly extraordinary. Pre-gaming had been fun and chaotic, but the line at the club had been so long that you’d all sobered up by the time you were inside and none of you felt compelled to pay for six dollar shots. At least the good music and nice DJ that took all of your requests made up for it.

The interesting bit happened on the bus ride back home.

By some miracle, Jihoon had run into some of his friendly course seniors that apparently liked him so much, they decided to pay for all of his drinks. Only an hour after getting into the club, he was nothing short of wasted. In your five months of being at university with him, you’d not once seen him in such a state - disheveled hair (from dancing too hard or from getting his hair ruffled like a cute dog by all of his seniors, you weren’t sure), deep red blush staining his cheeks, forehead, ears and neck, unfocused eyes and constant lopsided grin. When he almost tripped over his own feet during Gimme More by Britney Spears, you knew it was time to go home.

Jihoon was usually the one that had to deal with a drunk you, so you didn’t mind taking care of him this time. It was actually kind of fun, seeing this new side of the person who had become your closest friend in the past months.

Luckily for you, a night bus ran directly from the downtown area you were in to the street you and Jihoon lived on, and you managed to lug him to the bus stop. Getting him onto the bus and into a seat was an arduous task, but you made it, and were enjoying a calm, uneventful ride home until you felt Jihoon’s head drop onto your shoulder. You thought he’d just fallen asleep, but then the unmistakable sound of his voice made itself known to your ears.

“Y/N, Y/N…” Jihoon murmured with a muffled voice, burying his face in the crook of your neck. You tried to ignore the prickly feeling down your spine when his lips moved against your skin.

“Yes, Hoonie?” you asked, a tilt of amusement to your voice. You really had never seen your friend so intoxicated.

He sighed, lifting his head from your shoulder and resting it against the window with a bang. He didn’t even wince at the impact of his head against the glass - the alcohol had apparently rid him of the sensation of pain.

“Don’t call me that,” he mumbled, voice so quiet you had to ask him to repeat himself. “I said don’t call me that!”

You were taken aback by his sudden burst of irritation, but he sounded more like an upset child than anything.

“Call you what? Hoonie?”

“Yes.”

“Why? I’ve always called you that.” You tilted your head at him, but he kept his eyes fixed on the road outside.

“Exactly. You’re the only one who calls me that. Everyone else says Jihoon,” he said, annoyance clear in his voice. It sounded like this had been bothering him for a while, but it was complete news to you. “Can’t you even be bothered to say my full name, or something?”

You chuckled and brushed some hair out of his face. Like an angry cartoon character, he puffed air out of his nose and crossed his arms over his chest. His frown deepened and a blush spread over his face that was already red from the alcohol. “Should I call you Jihoon from now on?” you asked softly.

His reaction was immediate. He whipped around, almost knocking your head with his, a look of total alarm on his face. His eyes were almost teary. “No!” he exclaimed loudly, garnering glares from some of the other passengers in the bus who probably wanted some quiet this late at night. “No,” he repeated, this time more quietly, and turned back to the window.

In slight disbelief, you chuckled again. “What am I supposed to call you, then?”

“Just-” he started, but cut himself off with a sigh. “Just call me whatever.”

A small smile tugged at your lips. “I’ll stick to Hoonie, then.”

He groaned as he lifted his head from the window and let it fall back against your shoulder. The angle must’ve made it highly uncomfortable for his neck, but he didn’t seem to mind. He only stayed still for a few seconds before shifting slightly and burying his face in the dip between your shoulder and your neck once more, then let out a low hum of satisfaction.

“You smell nice,” he mumbled. Your breath caught in your throat. He was too close, his lips were too soft and his breath was too warm against your skin. Your whole body felt hot, like the bus driver had suddenly cranked the heat up and turned the bus into a sauna. “Like almonds,” he added, pressing his nose deeper into the base of your neck and inhaling there.

You tried to laugh, hoping it would dissipate the tension in your body, but it only came out as a choked sound. “It’s my body lotion,” you explained, voice weaker than you’d intended.

“Hm.”

You didn’t know what it was about Jihoon’s proximity that made your head spin so - no one had ever made you feel this way, and the fact that your body was reacting so intensely to someone you had considered your best friend for the past months made it all the more confusing.

“Are you asleep?” you asked him in a small voice after he’d been silent for some minutes.

“Just sleepy,” he murmured, shifting in his seat again. You tried not to shiver at the tickling sensation of his hair against your neck.

A pause. “Jihoon?”

“Don’t call me that.” You smiled, but there was a slight whine to his voice that, for some reason, made your heart ache.

You corrected yourself. “Hoon?”

“Mmh?”

“Why did it bother you that I call you Hoonie, all of a sudden?”

He took so long to answer that you almost thought he hadn’t heard you. “Because… every time you call me that, it makes me love you more,” he answered, voice getting gradually lower until it became a whisper.

Everything seemed to disappear around you. The other passengers, the seat underneath you, the blinking lights and the night sky outside the window. It was just you and Jihoon, his body warm next to yours and the only thing keeping you tethered to Earth.

“Makes you… love… me?” you echoed tentatively.

But no answer came. When you bent your head down to look at Jihoon, it seemed like he had fallen completely asleep, mouth slightly agape and the blush of alcohol still red on his face. You didn’t know what to make of his words, but there was no point asking him about them now. So you let him sleep on your shoulder, only waking him once you were nearing his stop.

Jihoon woke up the next morning with a pounding head and a bruised ego.

He had always prided himself in his ability to drink copious amounts of alcohol and yet only end up tipsy. Sure, it wasn’t exactly good for his body, but it meant that he never had to turn down a drink or watch on the sidelines as his friends did shots, and he could still get home just fine and not wake up with a head-splitting hangover the next day. Unlike you, who started giggling for no reason after one pint of beer and who tore it up on the dancefloor or talked to strangers like you’d been besties for years after two shots of tequila.

It only made his state of the previous night that much more embarrassing. He wished he had your amazing memory-erasing superpowers - but sadly, he didn’t, and what happened in the bus was glued to his brain.

Before he could even lift his head or get a cup of water, his phone rang, the sound invading his ears and splitting his head in two. He slid a thumb across his phone to accept the video call and was greeted by a close-up of Junkyu’s smiling face.

“Rise and shine! I heard someone got their party on last night.”

Jihoon groaned loudly, chucking his phone somewhere on his bed so he didn’t have to see his friend’s face anymore. His was definitely not the face he wanted to see first thing in the morning. Unfortunately for Jihoon, Junkyu had been blessed with an extraordinarily loud voice that still rang clear even when the speakers of Jihoon’s phone were stifled by his blankets.

“Y/N sent me a video of you. You looked ridiculous, man.”

“I hate you. I hate your face, I hate the way you talk, I hate how mean you are to me-”

“I can’t hear you. What was that?”

With another groan and a lot of difficulty, Jihoon raised his upper body and retrieved his phone. “You suck.”

Junkyu’s smile widened. “Well, that’s all from me. Have a glass of water!” he said cheerily before hanging up. Jihoon had never wanted to kill someone so badly.

His murderous feelings softened when he turned his head to find a plastic bottle of water and a headache pill along with a handwritten note on his bedside table. Have this and text me when you wake up! with five hearts at the bottom. It wasn’t signed, but he knew it was from you.

When the two of you met up for brunch sometime later, he kept searching your face and reading into your actions for any sign that what he’d said last night had made you uncomfortable. He’d expected you to be awkward around him, but your attitude almost made him think he’d imagined the whole thing. You joked around with him as usual, as if he hadn’t practically confessed to you last night, and he was desperate to know what might be going through your mind.

Had you forgotten? Had you chalked it up to him being drunk and talking nonsense? Had he had just thought it very hard, and not actually said it out loud? Or, worst of all, had you heard it all and understood him and decided to just ignore it for the sake of your friendship?

Jihoon was going crazy. He could barely taste his chicken and waffles.

The truth was, you just had no idea what to make of his words, and you were scared bringing it up might make things awkward. Jihoon could have forgotten all about it, or he could have meant something entirely different from where your wild, romance-comic-filled imagination went. Save for his tired eyes and groggy voice, he was no different at breakfast than he usually was, so you dropped it.

“Okay, Y/N, I think it’s time for you to go home now.”

Different Friday night, different party. A week had passed and neither of you had mentioned what Jihoon had said on the bus - it wasn’t quite out of your minds just yet, but you’d both separately decided to pretend nothing had happened.

This time, Jihoon had found you in the hallway playing beer pong and downing the cup of beer your opponent had thrown the ball into. Everybody cheered you on as you gulped the cheap liquid down before lifting the empty cup over your head, eyes screwed shut at the unpleasant bitterness in your mouth. Jihoon wasn’t sure why you were playing - you hated beer, and you had one of the worst throws he’d ever seen. But even he, who was supposed to look after you, couldn’t suppress a smile at your attempt and inevitable total fail at scoring a point for your team. Even with all the concentration in the world, the sheer amount of alcohol in your system would’ve made it impossible for you to make it.

Back against the wall and arms crossed over his chest, he watched amusedly as you squinted your eyes at the cups across the table from you, even sticking out your tongue as if that would make your aim any better. After a few tense seconds, you threw the ping-pong ball and hit Lee Jeno right in the chest. You’d giggled at your own failure, letting people pat you on the back for trying and reassure you that it’s okay (even though you really didn’t care) before stumbling right into Jihoon.

As soon as you’d recognized your friend’s face, you’d thrown your arms around his neck and pulled him down into a hug as you yelled his name happily; his hands had come up to your hips and gently pushed your body away from his. Then, he’d said the words you always hated to hear at a party.

“But we just got here!” you cried, the same answer you always gave him when he wanted to leave. You started walking away from him and back into the kitchen for more alcohol. He sighed but was quick to follow you.

“We got here three hours ago. Plus we did pres at Yoshi’s place. You’ve had way more than enough to drink,” he said, snatching a cup you’d just filled with punch from your hands.

“I was gonna drink that!” you complained, leaning against the counter for support.

Jihoon took in your swaying body and your dazed eyes and knew he had to get you home. Any more alcohol and you’d pass out in this stranger’s apartment. Usually, he’d let you drink to your heart’s content and just make sure you got home safe afterwards, but midterms were coming up, and you’d planned on studying the next day - he was just trying to minimize the severity of your hangover.

You mustered your most pitiful expression - to drunk you, there was no way Jihoon could resist your pouty lips and sad eyes. “Do we really have to go?” you asked, and Jihoon had to read your lips because of the loud music.

He smirked, seeing right through your little act. He bent his upper body so that his lips were right next to your ear. “You’ll thank me tomorrow,” he replied, making you drop your fake sad expression.

“I should go say bye to Minjeong and the others first.”

“I’ve already told them we were leaving.”

You rolled his eyes at him and his stupid smile and lifted yourself from the counter, immediately losing your balance. Maybe you had drunk too much. At least Jihoon was there to catch you and prevent you from falling. He tried to put his arm around your shoulder to support you but you stepped away from him and fixed him a pointed look.

“I can still walk, you know.”

Jihoon smiled but said nothing, gesturing at you to go on and walk. You turned around and started making your way out of the place, ignoring Jihoon’s snickers as you bumped into various party-goers and pieces of furniture.

When you reached the front door, you decided that actually, no, you couldn’t walk. Sliding against the wall, you let yourself drop into a crouching position. Your head suddenly felt like it was twice its normal weight and you regretted those last few shots of whatever it was you had drunk.

Jihoon sighed as he lowered himself and grabbed you under your armpits to lift you up. He had never been more thankful for an elevator and a bus stop only a minute’s walk away from where you were. Standing under bright lights in a desert and quiet street, it appeared like an oasis to Jihoon. Whoever’s party this had been, they lived in a really calm part of town. At this time on a Friday night, Jihoon’s street would be teeming with drunk students deciding which bar or club they should head to next.

You had never been more thankful for a bus stop with seats. You plopped yourself down on one of them, resting your head on the glass behind you and tightening your jacket around your shoulders. You closed your eyes, deciding this was the perfect time for a nap.

“Are you cold?” Jihoon asked, his voice keeping you from nodding off. You let out a non-committal hum in response which he wasn’t sure how to interpret. He chuckled and you heard a rustling sound before feeling an added weight on top of your body. “I’ll take that as a yes,” he murmured, then sat by your side.

Next thing you knew, Jihoon was making you stand again, and your feet moved of their own accord as he led you inside the bus. As soon as you were seated, you drifted back off to sleep. You jolted awake when your head drooped over, making you feel like you were falling. You sat up straight and looked around the empty bus, frantically asking Jihoon where you were.

“I’m taking you home,” he answered, laughter clear in his voice.

“Oh, okay,” you mumbled, and closed your eyes once more, falling back asleep in a matter of seconds.

Jihoon watched with a tender smile as your mouth opened slightly and let soft snores escape it. Scooting closer to you, he placed his palm on your cheek and pulled your head towards his shoulder so it could rest there.

“Why do you drink so much if you can’t handle it?” he asked quietly, even though he knew you were already in dreamland.

When you opened your eyes the next morning, you felt like a kid who had fallen asleep in the car on the way home from a distant relative's wedding and mysteriously woken up in their bed. You stretched out your limbs, enjoying the softness and warmth of your sheets covering your body until a headache and pasty mouth hit you like a ton of bricks. It felt like the alcohol had made your brain shrivel inside of your skull - your whole body was screaming for water.

Some kind of miracle had made a large glass of water appear on your bedside table, and you gulped it down in mere seconds. The hour on your phone read 10:24 a.m. - so much for getting up early and going to study at the library.

You’d have rather stayed curled up under your blankets and slept the rest of your hangover off, but some rustling noises from the kitchen (and an intense need to pee) forced you out of the comfort of your bed. You stumbled into the kitchen to find Jihoon placing a pancake atop an already dangerously high stack.

“Hey, Sleeping Beauty,” he greeted you, glancing at you with a smirk on his face as you made your way towards him. You stood behind him and rested your forehead at the base of his neck, as if catching a few last seconds of sleep.

The feeling of your hair against his skin sent shivers down his spine and he hoped his shaky intake of breath had gone unnoticed by you. His pancake was ready and he had to put it on the plate behind him, but as if a cat had fallen asleep in his lap, he couldn’t get himself to move. This was a moment he wanted to cherish - although you never particularly kept your distance from him, he was still always greedy for more of your touch.

“Hey, Hoonie,” you replied in a groggy voice. “Thank you for breakfast,” you said, moving to rest your lower back against the counter next to the stove. He missed you immediately. “And sorry for being a nuisance last night.”

Jihoon smiled at you as he turned to place the pancake on the stack. Then he leaned in slightly and you made sure not to breathe through your mouth so he wouldn’t smell your morning breath.

“You always apologize, and yet who’s dragging you home every single weekend?” he asked with an amused grin that let you know he wasn’t actually bothered by it.

He turned back to his pan and ladled more batter into it, forming a perfectly circular pancake. “Sorry,” you repeated guiltily.

He shook his head. “I’d rather be there and make sure you get home safe. And it’s not like I don’t have fun at those parties.”��

A small smile on your lips, you nodded and let his words assuage your guilt. “I’ll make coffee as a token of my gratitude.”

“How kind of you,” Jihoon teased, beaming.

No matter how many times Jihoon reassured you, you still felt bad that he thought it his obligation to do those things for you.

Although you’d only grown closer at the beginning of your first year of university, now six months ago, you and Jihoon had known each other since you were thirteen, and he fourteen. You still remembered his braces, wide boba eyes and round cheeks from your teenage years - when you saw him again five years later, you couldn’t deny your surprise at his much… manlier appearance. Sharper jaw, broader shoulders, taller figure, deeper voice - it was hard to recognize the Jihoon you’d known and the Jihoon in front of you as the same person.

His parents’ job made their family move around a lot - your town had been their fifth home since Jihoon’s birth already. The year and a half they stayed went by far too quickly, and before you knew it, you already had to say goodbye. Jihoon and Junkyu had grown really close in that year, and since you were always in your older brother’s business at that time, you’d developed a liking for your brother’s best friend, too. You liked the way he’d ruffle your hair whenever he came over to your house, the way he remembered strawberry milk was your favorite, and the way he’d wave at you in the school hallways, effectively making you cooler than all of your friends for knowing someone who was in the year above. At the time, you hadn’t known if what you felt for him could be described as a crush - all you knew was that for the rest of high school, you missed him.

When you found out that he had not only come back to South Korea to study, but that he was attending the university of your dreams, you couldn't have been more excited. But you chalked it up to the relief of knowing someone in an otherwise unfamiliar place.

Jihoon had been even more welcoming than you’d expected. He had come to get you at the airport with a big, colorful Welcome Y/N banner, helped you move into your dorm and treated you to a meal the night you arrived in town. Over the following weeks, he’d introduced you to his friends, showed you around campus, and kept inviting you out “so you would know where the good spots were.”

Thanks to him, settling in had been a much less stressful and emotionally exhausting process than you’d expected. But no matter how grateful you were, you couldn’t help but wonder why he was going to these lengths to welcome you.

Somewhere in the town center, there was a square that was extremely popular among skaters for a reason beyond your understanding. But at almost any time of the day and night, you could find people practicing their skating there. You’d just left a bar nearby with Minjeong, Jihoon and his friends, and to an intoxicated you, skating, something you had never attempted before, seemed like the thing to try out right then and there. You ran up to the first skater you found and asked him if he could show you how to ride.

Minjeong had run after you, finding a skater of her own while Jihoon’s friends either watched or talked about something else amongst themselves. Of course, the inevitable happened, and as soon as the skater let you try skating on your own, you’d fallen on your hands and knees. In a flash, Jihoon had been by your side, frantically asking if you were okay and making you show him your palms. They were only grazed, and one of your knees was bleeding very faintly, but Jihoon acted like you’d just broken something. He got you to get on his back so he could carry you to the nearest pharmacy, leaving his friends and Minjeong to wonder what the hell was going on. You tried telling him you were okay and could walk on your own just fine, but he wouldn’t listen.

He’d sat you on the curb in front of the all-night pharmacy and asked you to wait as he got disinfectant and bandages. You watched his face closely as he rubbed medical alcohol on your wounds. A crease had plagued his eyebrows ever since you fell, and he would not stop mumbling something about you needing to be more careful and you’re lucky you didn’t get hurt badly.

You hadn’t realized you were crying until one of your tears fell on Jihoon’s hand, hot against his skin, and he looked up at you with worry, any of his previous frustration with you wiped from his expression.

“Y/N? Why are you crying?” he’d asked, voice soft, as if trying not to scare you.

You sniffled. “Why are you so nice to me?”

His eyes softened and a small smile grew on his lips. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

You couldn’t bring yourself to mirror his smile, and the more you cried, the sadder you felt. Inexplicably, your tears just fell and fell and fell. Under the bright white lights of the pharmacy, in the cold of a particularly chilly September night, Jihoon wrapped an arm around you and let you cry on his shoulder. He didn’t ask any further questions, just waited for you to calm down as he rubbed a hand up and down your back and whispered in your ear that it was okay.

When you thought back on it now, you knew that it had just been the alcohol making you unreasonably emotional - you weren’t actually sad about Jihoon looking after you, if anything, it made you happy. But once you’d started crying, you couldn’t stop.

“I’m just looking out for you,” he’d said once your sniffling had somewhat lessened. You’d leaned back to look at him.

“But why?” you’d whined.

Your frown had deepened as his smile had widened. “Because we’re friends.”

“Is that it?”

“Well, Junkyu also asked me to look after you,” he admitted sheepishly.

You gasped in affront. “He what?!”

“Y/N-”

“So he’s been forcing you to do all of this?” you asked, voice breaking at the end. Your anger had lasted two seconds - you’d gone back to being sad at the thought of Jihoon only being nice to you because your stupid big brother had asked him to.

“No, no, it’s not like that, listen to me-”

“I can’t believe the two of you! I’m not a child-”

“Nobody said you were-”

“So you don’t actually even care-”

“I do!” Jihoon had exclaimed, louder than you’d expected, and it shut you up. “I do,” he repeated, voice softer. His hands were still on your upper arms, and he leaned in closer. “You’re his little sister. Of course he was worried about you leaving home. He just asked me to make sure you don’t get into too much trouble,” he explained, lightly tapping the tip of your nose with his finger.

He sighed, smiling as he watched you try to keep an upset expression on your face. He took the bandages out of the pack he’d just bought and stuck them with caution on your wounds. “But I wouldn’t be doing all of this if I didn’t care, Y/N.” When your eyes met again, you hadn’t known what to make of the look in his. “I missed you, you know.”

Just like that, the ducts behind your eyes filled up again, and large, hot tears streamed down your face as you rested your forehead against Jihoon’s shoulders again. He chuckled at your dramatics but placed a reassuring hand against your hair. “I missed you, too,” you replied between broken sobs.

He’d texted his friends to take Minjeong with them and go on without the two of you, then carried you back to his apartment, which was thankfully only a five-minute walk away.

Ever since that night, you and Jihoon had been inseparable. He continued checking on you consistently, bringing you food and coffee without you even asking and, of course, getting you home safe from nights out.

You were thankful to have a friend like him.

“Pancakes?!” your flatmate exclaimed as soon as she walked through the door, snapping you out of your thoughts.

“Hey, Minjeong,” you and Jihoon greeted in unison.

She was wearing her clothes from last night and her hair was a mess, but she had a bright expression on her face (despite the faint mascara stains underneath her eyes). You narrowed your eyes at her but she made a beeline for the food, completely ignoring you.

“Hot,” she mumbled as she held a pancake between her fingers, but threw a piece in her mouth anyway. “You’re so lucky to have a boyfriend like him, Y/N,” she said around her food.

“Isn’t she?” Jihoon replied before you could say anything.

You rolled your eyes at the pair in front of you and poured a cup of coffee for Minjeong. She referred to Jihoon as your boyfriend so often that you didn’t bother to correct her anymore. “Not my boyfriend. And even so, he’s more like a bodyguard than anything.”

“Being a bodyguard is just one of the many duties of being a boyfriend,” Minjeong declared, easily ignoring you. “Don’t you agree, Jihoon?”

He nodded, a serious look on his face. “Absolutely. I take what I do very seriously.” When his eyes found yours, he shot you a wink. Your frown deepened.

“Anyway, care to share why you’re coming home so late?”

A blush creeped on Minjeong’s cheeks. “Well, Yoshi’s place is quite a ways from here…” she murmured, looking down at her half-eaten pancake.

“Called it!” you yelled, just as Jihoon let out a loud “no” of shock and defeat.

“Next takeaway is on you,” you told Jihoon with a proud smile. In a mature response, he stuck his tongue out at you.

Minjeong frowned at both of you. “You guys bet on this?” she asked, vexed. Jihoon exchanged a look, glanced back at her, and shrugged. “Not cool. I didn’t even know something would happen with him. How did you guess?”

You smiled. “You always go for the cute ones.”

She hummed in agreement, her expression almost a pained one. “He’s just the cutest little thing ever, I couldn’t help myself.” She took a sip of her coffee, cringing at the bitter taste before getting up to fetch sugar and milk.

You sighed at your friend. “You’re gonna break that poor boy’s heart.” You knew Minjeong wasn’t to blame for the boys that got attached to her when she made it clear she wasn’t looking for a relationship - but if it happened to Yoshi, you’d feel guilty. You’d met him in a tutorial for one of your Digital Media courses and he seemed like he wouldn’t hurt a fly. He’d invited you to do pres at his place, and you’d dragged Minjeong and Jihoon along, so they’d met through you. In a way, if Yoshi fell for Minjeong and got hurt, it’d be your fault.

“I told him I didn’t want anything serious,” she said, pouring as much milk as there was coffee in her mug.

“He doesn’t seem like the type to do casual stuff,” Jihoon chimed in as he placed the last pancake on top of the stack. But it was one pancake too many, and the whole stack fell over. Jihoon wasn’t rattled - he placed a few on his plate then rebuilt the stack.

Minjeong ate her last bite of pancake and got up from the stool. “Well, we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.”

“We? This is your problem, babe,” you said.

Minjeong smiled at you, eyes crinkling as she pressed a wet kiss to your cheek. You were sure there was some pancake left on her lips. “You’re such a good friend, Y/N,” she said, making you laugh. Of course you’d help Minjeong if she needed - but you were starting to feel bad for all the hearts she kept breaking. “I’m going back to bed,” she announced. Then, she put her hand next to her mouth as if telling you a secret, but spoke loud enough for Jihoon to hear anyway: “I didn’t get a lot of sleep last night, is all I’ll say.”

Jihoon choked on his food and you let out a groan of disgust, but you both burst into laughter anyway. “I want details later!” you called out.

“You won’t be disappointed,” she said between giggles as she closed her bedroom door behind her.

Just then, your phone buzzed with an incoming video call, Junkyu’s face taking up your screen. “Hey, ugly face,” you greeted, propping your phone up against the milk bottle.

“Hey, stink.”

“Hey, Kyu!” Jihoon called out and took a seat close next to you - you knew he was just trying to squeeze into frame, but the sudden proximity still made your breath catch in your throat for a second.

Your brother’s eyes narrowed. “What are the two of you doing together on a Sunday morning?”

You looked at Jihoon, then back at your screen. “Is there something wrong with Sunday mornings?”

“Not inherently, no…” your brother conceded. “But still.”

You rolled your eyes at him and his meaningless suspiciousness. “We just went to a party together last night and he crashed here afterwards.”

“She was so wasted I had to bring her home. And I made pancakes this morning.”

“Y/N, if you don’t marry this guy, I will,” Junkyu said with all the seriousness in the world, and Jihoon made a kissy face at him.

“What’s up with everyone today?” you sighed. “I’m going to shower. You two have fun.” You knew your brother probably didn’t have much to tell you anyway - he liked calling you for no other reason than to bother you.

“Oh, we will,” Jihoon said with a suggestive tone, and you made a vomiting noise before disappearing into the bathroom.

“When I told you to look after her, I just meant to make sure she doesn’t drink too much or get involved with weirdos. I didn’t mean to make her pancakes on Sunday mornings,” Junkyu teased, a knowing smile on his face.

Jihoon looked down at his place, a small smile growing on his lips as well. “I know, but I like doing those things for her.”

Junkyu let out an odd noise, half out of disgust and half out of annoyance. “I can’t believe you. Just ask her out, already.”

“So you don’t like me at her place on a Sunday morning, but you want me to ask her out?”

Junkyu rolled his eyes (Jihoon thought this was a family trait, at this point). “I’m trying to help you out here, buddy. I know she’s my little sister, but you’re also my best friend,” he started, ignoring Jihoon’s aww, “and I don’t know how much longer I can stand you being in love with her but not making a move.” He paused to sigh. “I know you’re a good guy, so you have my approval, or whatever.”

Jihoon smiled somewhat sadly, picking at his food with his fork. “I appreciate it, Kyu, but I really don’t think she feels the same way.”

“How do you know that? Have you asked her?” Junkyu asked, not even trying to hide his impatience.

“No, but-”

“Do I need to do it for you? Do you want to hide behind my back while I tell my little sister, hey, my friend here has something he wants to tell you? Hey, my friend thinks you’re pretty, do you want to talk to him? Are you a big baby who can’t do anything, Park Jihoon?”

“No, I just-”

“You know, if this were a k-drama and you were the main lead, everybody would get Second Lead Syndrome. Me included. You suck.”

“Supportive as ever, Kyu,” Jihoon said, sighing.

“If you don’t ask her, you’re a bitch. I’m hanging up now,” Junkyu said before Jihoon could get another word in. He just shook his head, chuckling as he dug into his pancakes again.

The two of them had had this conversation about a thousand times, and they always came to the same conclusion: Junkyu thought Jihoon should confess his feelings to you, and Jihoon dismissed the idea, knowing he’d never have the guts to do it. To him, making jokes about being your boyfriend and relentlessly flirting with you was sign enough of his affection for you - you just needed to figure out that he wasn’t actually kidding at all. He was already doing half of the work for you, really.

An hour later, the two of you were sitting on the fifth floor of the library, where nobody ever dared to venture because of its dark corners and maze-like rows of bookshelves. It creeped Jihoon out, but it was your favorite place to study, so on days he couldn’t convince you to go to a nicer spot, he sucked it up and followed you to the table you liked by a window that overlooked the park next to the campus. The window let some light in, but to get there, you had to go through dim hallways that looked like they hadn’t seen a human soul in years. Jihoon didn’t know how you’d found out about it in the first place. It felt like something a fourth-year would keep as a secret, not something a first-year would have discovered in her first months of attending uni.

As he observed your sleeping figure, Jihoon couldn’t help but feel slightly annoyed. You’d gotten about twenty minutes of work done before resting your head atop your crossed arms, claiming you would just take a “power nap.” He couldn’t believe you’d emotionally manipulated him (pouted up at him and gave him puppy eyes - with that look on your face, Jihoon would agree to murdering someone for you) into going to this creepy part of the library only to sleep almost immediately after getting there.

He bent down onto his arms, mirroring your position, and let himself have this moment. Even though he saw you all the time, it wasn’t often that he could shamelessly stare at you and get away with it.

He watched as your shoulders rose and fell to the consistent rhythm of your breathing, as the sunlight pouring in from the window made your eyelashes cast shadows against your cheeks. You looked so peaceful that any trace of his irritation towards you vanished. It wasn’t like he could ever really be mad at you.

Jihoon loved how little you had changed in the years you’d been apart. Of course, you’d grown into your features and didn’t quite look like the thirteen-year-old version of you he’d known, but still, you had the same face and same habits he’d fallen in love with in the first place.

He still remembered the way his heart had swelled when he’d found your face amongst the crowd at the airport, how his whole body had buzzed with excitement at the idea of finally seeing you again after all these years. When you’d received your admission email from your university, the first thing Junkyu had told Jihoon was that he’d better look after you. It wasn’t like he didn’t think you couldn’t handle yourself, but it reassured him, knowing someone he trusted so much would be there to help you adjust to university life, since he couldn’t do it himself.

Jihoon had taken this seriously. Junkyu hadn’t given him any sort of instructions - the picking you up at the airport, introducing you to his friends, making sure you were well-fed and well-caffeinated, that was all him. At first, he tried convincing himself that he was doing this in an old friend, big brother fashion - he knew how close you and Junkyu were, so he fancied himself a sort of Junkyu 2.0 for you to rely on.

It had been when he saw your red, puffy eyes, trembling lips and tear-stained cheeks that he realized his old feelings had resurfaced. After all, don’t they say you never really forget your first love?

Truth be told, that whole night had been a dead giveaway. From the moment you met up at the bar to his little nurse moment in front of the pharmacy, his heart had not stopped racing. He kept checking on you, making sure you were having fun and handling your alcohol, and stuck by your side the whole time, like a bee to a flower.

He remembered standing arms crossed over his chest and observing you with narrowed eyes as you tried out skating. He was telling himself he was just watching in case you got hurt, but he couldn’t ignore the way his stomach twisted with a hot, unpleasant emotion as the skater guided you, hands on your waist. He didn’t like that you held that stranger by his shoulders, relying on him and not Jihoon for support, or that you laughed together like you’d been friends for years. Jihoon was your long-time friend, not this random long-haired, baggy-shirted, vans-wearing loser skater that probably had a name like Mark or something.

When you’d fallen from that skateboard, his heart had dropped in his stomach. He’d been sick with worry that you’d gotten badly hurt, and even upon seeing your barely-grazed palms and knees, he hadn’t been reassured.

Seeing you cry had made him panic like crazy. He tried his best to comfort you, but had no idea whether he was doing a good job. For days after that night, he’d replayed the conversation the two of you had under the lights of the pharmacy.

“Why are you so nice to me?”

“Why wouldn’t I be? I’m just looking out for you.”

“But why?”

“Because we’re friends.”

“Is that it?”

Jihoon hadn’t known whether you meant, is that the only reason, or, are we only friends? But he’d thought the second question was wishful thinking on his part. So he told you about the promise he’d made to Junkyu, and that had somehow made you even more upset. Even though he hadn’t said it outright, he’d thought he had made it clear that he wasn’t only doing this because Junkyu had told him to - he also wanted to be there for you. He did care, more than he wanted to admit.

Over time, his feelings for you had grown far bigger than simple teenage nostalgia - he loved your present self impossibly more than fourteen-year-old Jihoon had loved thirteen-year-old you. He thought he made it obvious - he always made sure to compliment you, remembered your coffee order and favorite dishes from your favorite restaurants, rushed to your side whenever you needed him, and did everything he could think of to support you. Sure, he relentlessly teased you as well, but that was just Jihoon.

If you noticed him, you didn’t show it. He wasn’t sure whether you genuinely didn’t know he wanted you as more than a friend or were playing dumb, but he knew you saw him as something like a second older brother. But Jihoon had come to terms with that - he’d rather be in your life as a friend than not at all.

This was why he was grateful for moments like these, when he could just look at you without you knowing.

After five minutes, Jihoon quietly got up and bravely made his way through the dark hallways and back outside to get you a drink - in case you woke up grumpy from your nap, he knew a matcha latte would appease you. He almost got lost on his way back, but when he found your table again, you were still sleeping. He couldn’t help himself - before rousing you, he snapped a quick picture of your sleeping face, making sure to get the drool pooling at the corner of your lips in frame. The photo went into his Y/N folder, full of pictures and videos he’d both secretly and not-so-secretly taken of you, which, no, wasn’t creepy at all, thank you very much.

When he pressed one drink to your cheek and the other to your forehead, you woke up with a gasp, then immediately winced at the pain in the side of your neck from the uncomfortable sleeping position.

“I wasn’t sure whether you’d want a hot one or an iced one, so I just got both.”

“Ooh, iced, please,” you said. “Thanks, Hoonie.” But before you could grab the drink, he snatched it away.

“No drinking until you get at least one thing done,” he said, a satisfied smirk on his lips.

You frowned. “But the ice will melt and it’ll taste all watery.”

Jihoon didn’t want to give in so easily.

“Hm?” you hummed, tilting your head at him.

Jihoon gave in, handing you your drink with a tut. Seeing your excited grin and hearing your sigh of contentment after taking a sip made it worth it.

About two (surprisingly productive) hours later, your stomach started demanding nourishment, and who were you to deny it? Your hangover was strong that day, and even the pancakes and coffee hadn’t completely rid your mouth of its sour taste. You needed something salty and greasy, so you pitched going to the fried chicken place a few blocks down to Jihoon, who agreed immediately.

On the way there, you tried to recollect some moments from the party yesterday, but quickly realized that not much was coming to mind. Pre-drinks at Yoshi’s were clear in your head, and so was walking to the other party - but the better part of your memories after that were fuzzy or non-existent.

“Hoonie?” you suddenly asked.

“Hm?”

“Did I do anything embarrassing last night?”

Jihoon chuckled. “Not more than usual.”

You groaned and pushed his shoulder, making him laugh even more. “I mean, you just kinda danced like crazy and talked to absolutely anyone. At some point you were gone for like twenty-five minutes, and I found you in the bathroom taking selfies with girls I’d never seen before in my life.”

You pulled out your phone and checked your gallery - indeed, there were about fifty pictures of you and some random girls. “Who are they?” you asked, more to yourself than to Jihoon, in disbelief at how comfortable last-night-you looked with these strangers. “They seem nice enough, I guess.” You laughed with Jihoon before sighing. “Well, that’s not too bad. I’ve done worse things.”

Jihoon made a face as if to say, Yeah, I know, and you rolled your eyes at him. You returned your gaze to the path in front of you, but if you’d kept on looking at Jihoon, you’d have noticed the smirk growing on his lips as a joke formed in his head. After some time, with a shit-eating grin on his face, he broke the silence. “Oh, well, there was also that moment when you confessed your undying love for me, tears streaming down your face, begging on your knees, all the works. That was pretty embarrassing. But I get it.”

It was so ridiculous that you couldn’t help yourself from laughing as you slapped his shoulder. “You wish,” you said between giggles.

I do wish, he immediately thought, but kept it to himself. He laughed instead and could only hope his real thoughts weren’t so obvious.

Two things happened in the fried chicken shop restaurant.

Well, three, if you counted their promotion on their chicken rice cake coleslaw menu, which was your favorite and which Jihoon always chided you for ordering (“Anyone who likes coleslaw is not human”), but in the grand scheme of things, that wasn’t so important.

First, your mom called. Now, this wasn’t anything huge in itself, but it was Jihoon’s behavior that got to you.

You had gotten maybe five words before he snatched the phone from you and lifted it to his ear. “Hi, Mrs Kim!”

You heard a faint but enthusiastic “Hi, Jihoon!” on the other side of the line. They made small talk for a bit, and you couldn’t believe your mom could have forgotten about her only daughter so quickly. You’d dived back into your fried chicken, pretending you didn’t care about whatever it was they were talking so energetically about, until you heard your name on the other end.

Your and Jihoon’s eyes met. A mischievous smile spread across his lips and your gaze hardened. “Yes, well, you know her, she’s a bit of a nuisance, but I’m keeping her out of trouble and all that. I saved her from joining a cult the other day,” he said, and you rolled your eyes at him.

“Oh dear!” you heard your mother exclaim.

“You didn’t save me from anything, I knew what that woman was up to.”

You’d been waiting for Jihoon outside of the movie theater when an older woman approached you. She seemed friendly enough, and you thought she was just a lonely grandma in need of a nice discussion - which it was at first, until it veered towards religion. Next thing you knew, she was telling you stories about the upcoming end of the world and how we had to beg for salvation. You didn’t believe any of it, but you found it captivating, so you stood there listening to her and egging her on until Jihoon showed up and forced you out of there. You thought it’d have been funny if he’d listened along, but knowing Jihoon, a small part of him might have actually believed her and started freaking out.

“I didn’t know you and my mom were so chummy,” you said when the phone call was over. She hadn’t even asked to talk to you again.

“Your mom’s awesome. I can’t believe such a lovely woman gave birth to two gremlins like you and Junkyu. Are you sure you’re not adopted?”

It had seemed like nothing at the time, but when you played the scene over again in your mind that night as you lay in bed, the fact that Jihoon got along with your family filled your heart with an unexpected warmth. It was almost like he was part of the family himself - not in a third child way, but more in a if you brought him home to your family, he’d fit right in, a thought that had made you panic as soon as it’d appeared in your mind. Because why were you thinking of bringing Jihoon home? Why did it make you so happy, knowing he’d be welcomed with open arms?

You shook your head against your pillow, hoping it’d make those thoughts vanish. You reassured yourself by telling yourself that you’d be just as happy bringing a friend like Minjeong home, and that you were sure she’d get along just fine with your brothers and parents.

The other sign had been much more straightforward. You weren’t afraid to eat messily in front of Jihoon, so some honey barbecue sauce had spread over the corner of your lips as you wolfed down one of the wings. As soon as Jihoon started to lean in across the table, you knew you were in trouble.

Not only did he wipe the sauce off your lips with his thumb, but he licked it off of his finger, never breaking eye contact throughout the whole ordeal. Your whole body tensed and you swear you stopped breathing for a second.

It only really lasted maybe five seconds, but felt like hours to you. You glared at him for a bit before diving back into your chicken, hoping you didn’t look as flustered as you felt. But Jihoon and his stupid, proud smirk probably knew what he’d done to you. As if that wasn’t enough already, he even had the audacity to whisper cute under his breath. Your eyes snapped back up to his face, but he just smiled and nodded towards your food, telling you to keep eating.

Over the next week, the word cute refused to leave your mind. You kept replaying that scene over and over - the feeling of Jihoon’s thumb on your lips, the sight of his own lips around his thumb, his gaze through it all. It wasn’t the first time such thoughts of Jihoon plagued you - once, he’d guided you through a crowded club with a hand on your lower back and the way the warmth of his hand against you had made you feel prompted you to ignore him for the rest of the night. Another time, he’d kissed you on the forehead after dropping you off at your apartment and you hadn’t been able to look him in the eyes for the following week.

You took the small but meaningful events of that day as your second sign of your new odd feelings directed towards your best friend, feelings that you didn’t know how to name just yet.

Crazy rich Yoon Jaehyuk was having a pool party at his house, and basically everyone was invited. If you knew about the party, you could go - all Jaehyuk had to do was to tell maybe ten people and let them spread the word. As his partner for an English Linguistics class you had together that semester, you were one of those privileged people who’d known firsthand about the event and had made sure to tell everyone you knew to come. You shouldn’t have been so surprised to find what must’ve already been a hundred people on the front lawn, inside the house and around the pool when you showed up with Jihoon and the rest of your friends there.

Coincidentally, this was when the third sign occurred. Third time’s a charm, as they say, and the events of that night and those following cemented your growing hunch that something really was up.

Pre-drinks at yours and Minjeong’s place had already taken quite a toll on you. Jaehyuk lived at the edge of town, quite a ways from your flat, but the vodka cranberry you’d snuck in on the bus prevented you from sobering up during the long ride. When your group arrived at the party, both you and Minjeong were ready to dance. But before you could rush to wherever the dancefloor was, Jihoon caught you by the wrist, effectively stopping you in your tracks. Your eyes went from his fingers around your wrist to his smiling face, a surprised look on your own.

“We’re gonna head directly to the pool. Don’t drink too much, okay?”

Your lips blossomed with a smile. Typical Jihoon. “Okay.”

The alcohol probably had something to do with it, but a surge of affection for your friend hit you and you stood on your tiptoes to press a kiss to his cheek before taking Minjeong’s hand in yours and making a beeline in the direction of the music.

I Gotta Feeling by the Black Eyed Peas was calling your name and you didn’t think to turn around to look at Jihoon, so you missed the way he watched your figure retreating into the mass of drunk students as he tried to commit the warmth of your lips against his cheek to memory.

You and Minjeong made your way to the center of the crowd, shrieking with drunken excitement when you found a group of girls from one of your shared classes there and exchanging very brief pleasantries before falling into the rhythm of one of your all-time favorite party songs. In your humble opinion, no one understood partying like The Black Eyed Peas did.

You only leave the dancefloor on one occasion, which is to take a round of vodka shots with your new best friends for the night - Jihoon had said not to drink too much, not not at all. One of the girls (Yunjin, you thought, but she showed up to class so seldom you weren’t sure) had a trick of pouring a lick of strawberry syrup before the alcohol, so that you wouldn’t be hit with the nail polish remover aftertaste of vodka. You were delighted to find it worked (almost) like magic.

It’s about an hour later when you and Minjeong reach the pool, not quite sober but more so than when you’d arrived at the party. For a pool party, there were definitely less people there than inside the house, maybe due to the fact that it was the end of February and most people didn’t want to risk getting hypothermia from the temperature difference between the heated pool and the cold outside.

The relatively small number of people makes it easy to spot Jihoon, in nothing but his swimming trunks and a towel around his shoulders, sitting on a longchair a dozen or so meters away from you. Something about half-naked Jihoon, you’re not sure what, makes you want to walk over to him and do… you’re not sure what, but Minjeong frantically slapping your arm and whispering your name stops you from doing whatever it was you wanted to do.

“Y/N! Y/N! Yoshi is right there,” she whisper-yelled. Indeed, Yoshi was in the pool, not far from where you stood, playing with his friends you recognized from pre-drinks at his place the other day. Minjeong’s face was redder than you’d ever seen it, and you recalled a conversation you’d had earlier that day.

“Will Yoshi be there?” Minjeong had asked, trying to sound innocent.

You’d looked at your flatmate with an incredulous look on your face. “Yes, he’ll be there, you slut. I thought you never went for a second time?”

She’d shrugged, an unusually shy smile playing on her lips as she looked down at her feet. “I don’t know, we’ll see.”

This was very unlike Minjeong - in your six months of knowing each other, it was the first time you ever saw her even consider getting with someone a second time. You didn’t know what sort of spell this Yoshi guy had cast on your friend, but it must’ve been very effective.

“Go talk to him,” you simply said.

“What?! No way, I can’t- Oh my God, he’s looking at us,” she said, words rushing out of her mouth, “he’s looking right at us, isn’t he?”

You just laughed at your friend and waved at Yoshi who was already waddling towards your edge of the pool. “Hey, Yoshi!” you called excitedly. At the sound of your voice, Jihoon’s head snapped towards you. He wasted no time in yelling your name, motioning for you to come over, so you gestured back that you’d be there in a minute.

“Hey, Y/N!” Yoshi called back with the same tone. “Hey, Minjeong,” he added, tone somewhat quiet, but the blush that grew on his cheeks told you you weren’t the one he was most happy to see.

“Hey, Yoshi,” she said so quietly, you weren’t sure the boy could even hear her.

“Nice to see you guys here,” he said, talking to you but glancing nervously at Minjeong.

“You too!” you replied, and before he could add anything, you placed a hand on your friend’s shoulder. “Well, I’m sure the two of you have a lot to talk about. See you later!”

You grinned innocently at Minjeong as she called your name, eyes wide in panic. She was a big girl, and Yoshi was clearly into her - she could handle herself. Jihoon eyed you amusedly as you made your way towards him.

“Are you setting them up?” he asked when you were within earshot of him.

“I’d be a bad friend if I didn’t at least try. I’ve never seen Minjeong blush over a guy, so this must be serious.”

A few of Jihoon’s friends were hanging out next to him, people that you knew from the many parties you attended together but that you rarely saw outside of drinking contexts. You waved at them before sitting on the deckchair next to Jihoon’s. He pivoted in his seat to face you, seemingly not minding that he’d just turned his back to his friends, then scooched his chair closer to yours so that your knees touched. You rested your palms next to your thighs and kept your gaze down. Something about Jihoon kept you from meeting his eyes, tonight. Maybe it was the half-nakedness.

Jihoon eyed you for a little bit, wondering what was making you so unusually quiet, before looking behind his shoulder to check whether Minjeong had been able to make progress on her own.

“Looks like it’s going well,” he assessed.

You followed his gaze to find Minjeong sitting at the edge of the pool and kicking her legs in the water while Yoshi stood next to her, water up to his belly button. You smiled as they giggled and splashed each other - it was going well, indeed.

“Have you been in the pool yet?” you asked, shifting your gaze to the party-goers playing in the water. The echoes of people talking and water splashing were quite loud, but Jihoon was so close that you didn’t need to raise your voice too much.

“No, I just took my shirt off for the hell of it.”

You had meant to bring your eyes up to his face, you really had - but somewhere on the way, they stopped on his abs, and got stuck there. It was probably a full five seconds before you could look away from the well-defined muscles on his stomach and finally meet his eyes. He didn’t need to say anything - the smirk playing on his lips and the slight surprise in the raise of his brows were enough to tell you he had not missed your stare.

You looked back to the pool, eyebrows slightly creased in shame at having been so obvious. Thankfully, you had brought a drink with you and took a swig of it there. “I wouldn’t put it past you.”

You were trying to ignore the way Jihoon’s eyes burned into the side of your face, the way they followed your every move, but with each passing second, you felt more conscious of them. Not unlike one would try to escape a wasp, you thought that going into the pool might tear Jihoon’s eyes away from you at least for a little bit. It’s not that his gaze made you uncomfortable, like that of a random old man in the street would, but it definitely made you feel… things. Things that you didn’t necessarily want to dive into.

The problem was that, to go into the pool, you’d need to get into your swimsuit. You’d thought ahead and had come already clad into your bikini underneath your clothes, a black, strapless tube dress that was easy to take off so you could jump into the pool at any time. But getting rid of that dress right in front of Jihoon and his watchful eyes was more nerve-wracking than you’d imagined.

You downed the rest of your cup for some liquid courage and shot up from your seat, releasing a deep breath as you did so. You thought it was better to just get it over with than make it last any longer than it needed to. Jihoon’s eyes glinted with amusement as they followed your every move.

“Let’s go back in.”

Your plan had been to lift your dress off of your body and head straight to the pool, but Jihoon’s gaze made you freeze in place after stripping. You couldn’t quite describe it as lustful, or as hungry, because there was a hint of surprise there that softened it. It was like he couldn’t believe what he was seeing and loving it at the same time, if the slowly growing smirk on his lips was anything to go by. Your whole body felt like it was on fire, a fire that made your knees turn to jelly and that rendered you close to breathless.

You let his curious eyes travel your body for a few seconds before clearing your throat. “Do you want a picture or something?” you asked ironically, hoping your voice didn’t sound as shaky as you felt.

His smirk only widened. “No need. The real thing is so much better.”

You tried not to cower under his shameless gaze, instead stood up straighter and stared right back at him. “My eyes are up here, you know.”

“I know,” he replied, but his eyes stayed trained on your body. You watched as they slowly made their way up your legs, took in your stomach and waist, then paused on your chest, which was quickly falling and rising with your shallow breathing. It was only when you scoffed and crossed your arms that he looked at your face.

Still that lopsided smirk on his lips, he stood up and languidly made his way towards you. He came so close that you had to slightly crane your neck to meet his gaze.

Your heart raced as he let a few seconds of silence stretch between the two of you, keeping his eyes locked in yours. “Nice eyes,” he murmured after a pause, the sudden depth of his voice sending a shiver down your spine.

After six months of seeing him almost every day, one would think Jihoon’s flirty personality would not have such an effect on you anymore. And most of the time, it didn’t - even back in the day, he was already fond of teasing you, so usually, him telling you how pretty you looked, patting your head or him tucking stray strands of hairs behind your ear went somewhat unnoticed by you. Or at least, it was easier not to freak out over “small” things like these.

But this was one of the times when you thought he was really pushing it, and you lost the ability to even eye-roll, which was your usual defense against his flirting attacks. You hated to admit, but you just couldn’t pretend it didn’t have an effect on you. You hated it because you knew he was just flirting as a joke, not because he was actually interested or anything of the sort, and you felt stupid that it still did something to you - although you sometimes doubted whether he really was doing it just for fun. You wanted to think he was acting the way he was on purpose, to get a reaction out of you. It’d make you feel less of a fool.

Before you’d even had time to understand the meaning behind his words, he’d already walked away from you and to the pool. When your senses had come back and you spun around, he was already inside the water. He looked like a cute wet puppy with his hair sticking out all around his head, especially when he shook it and let droplets of water fall off his hair and splash around him, and you couldn’t believe this was the same man that had essentially called your tits nice just moments prior.

The raging butterflies in your stomach were your third sign.

You must’ve stared long, because after a while, your eyes met again, and a smile reappeared on his face. An actual smile, this time, not a smirk or anything of the sort. As if nothing had just happened - as if it was absolutely natural for your best friend to practically devour you with his eyes like that.

He waved you over and you noticed Minjeong and Yoshi were with him, seemingly waiting for you as well. When you reached the edge of the pool, someone entered the room with a platter of shots of God knows what, and you immediately reached out for one and downed it. Sambuca, you realized with relief as the sweet liquid burned its way down your throat. That way, if your body kept buzzing the way it had been around Jihoon, you could blame it on the alcohol and nothing else.

Minjeong and Yoshi were already back in their new little world, but Jihoon watched with an amused grin as you measured the temperature of the water with a foot, then, deeming it warm enough, made your way towards your friends. There, the water reached up to your shoulders, and the fact that it got up to just a little bit under Jihoon’s chest only marked your height difference further, which shouldn’t have made you as flustered as it did.

“Didn’t I tell you not to drink too much before going into the water?” Jihoon asked, laughter clear in his voice.

“How about you let me drink as much as I want, and make sure I don’t drown?” you bit back, even though you knew it wasn’t much of a comeback. You had spoken in an irritated tone that, going by the way his smile softened, Jihoon found cute.

“Okay, I will,” he said, and the sweetness in his tone only served to further unnerve you.

If he noticed your annoyance, he didn’t say anything.

You let yourself be convinced to play a game of chicken fight against Minjeong and Yoshi, which (along with that shot of Sambuca) made your competitive streak kick in and allowed you to, at least momentarily, forget about your irritation towards your friend. The reason behind that irritation was something you didn’t even want to think about.

Somehow, you endured the prickling on your skin as Jihoon kept your thighs tightly pressed around his shoulders with two big hands. Even when he squeezed the flesh there or craned his neck to look up at you with those big, round eyes of his, you managed to not let the way your stomach flipped get to your head.

You weren’t sure how you won all three rounds of chicken fight, if it was thanks to Jihoon’s devotion to the gym, or yours to the free weekly Sunday morning pilates class your uni gym offers. It might’ve been down to the level of complicity you and Jihoon had built over the months that Yoshi and Minjeong hadn’t reached yet (if that can even be a factor in chicken fight success) - all you know, is that you do, and that even underwater, Jihoon’s hands burn as they snake their way around your waist, and press your body flush to his in a celebratory hug.

Some time later, you sit at the edge of the pool by yourself, having been deserted by the two lovebirds who not-so-sneakily snuck away under the pretext of getting some drinks, as well as by Jihoon who was called by some friends to join him back in the pool. You were at the level of tipsiness that made you want to self-introspectively sit on your own and people-watch for a little bit.

Until someone broke your peace.

“Hey, Y/N,” you heard a vaguely familiar voice say. Before you could respond, Kim Sunwoo was sitting next to you, a bit too close in your opinion for your level of acquaintance, clad in black swimming trunks that let the band of his Calvin Klein underwear peek through.

He wasn’t half bad-looking, you decided in that instant.

“Oh, hi, Sunwoo,” you replied, smiling as you unquestioningly accepted the drink he offered you and thanked him for it. You peered at the orange liquid and decided it was the right color for alcohol before taking a sip. It being orange vodka didn’t come as much of a surprise. “I didn’t know you knew my name,” you admitted.

You recognized Sunwoo’s face from the Introduction to Literary Theory lecture you’d had last semester, and had learned his name when the lecture had to be online due to the professor falling ill, and he was one of the few brave students who had turned his camera on. With a face like his, you understood where the confidence came from.

Then, one night out on the town with Minjeong and other friends, you’d run into him at the counter of a bar, and had exchanged a few (flirty, if you recalled correctly) words, but not your names, hence the slight confusion.

He chuckled and you watched as two deep dimples appeared on his cheeks. “I did my research before coming here. Sadly, no one knew what kind of drink you liked, so I went for something basic and prayed.”

“This is perfect,” you said, laughing.

“To be perfectly honest,” he starts after a slight pause, “I’ve seen you around campus, and we even saw each other at a bar once, didn’t we?” he asks, and grins when you nod. “I felt stupid for never asking for your name, or your number. So when I saw you sitting here, I thought it must be fate that brought me to this party.”

You had barely registered his words, let alone formed any sort of response in your mind when Jihoon suddenly appeared in front of the two of you, placing a hand right next to your thigh on the pool edge. You hadn’t noticed him swimming your way.

“Hey, Sunwoo. I see you’ve met my girlfriend,” Jihoon blatantly lies as if it was the most natural thing in the world. The shock is apparent on Sunwoo’s face, and if it wasn’t for the sweet, convincing smile Jihoon was looking at you with, you might’ve let your surprise show more.

Sunwoo didn’t know Jihoon like you did, so you didn’t know whether he noticed the tightness in his grin, the challenge in his slightly raised eyebrows, or the general way he was holding himself that screamed Leave. But he must’ve noticed something, because it only took him a few seconds to start nodding slowly and rise from his seat.

For some reason, you stayed quiet, letting the word girlfriend and the way it had rolled off Jihoon’s tongue so easily repeat over and over again in your head. Maybe it was the alcohol, but he had said it so convincingly that you almost questioned whether you actually were Jihoon’s girlfriend. Before you could think any more about it, however, Sunwoo broke the increasingly tense silence.

“My bad, man, I didn’t know she was taken. I’ll leave you two to it, then,” he said with a smile, and that was that.

You watched his retreating figure for a bit, eyebrows creased in confusion, before snapping your head towards Jihoon. Head tilted, he was fixing you with a questioning look, as if to ask, What are you up to?, when he was the one that had just acted strangely.

“What was that all about?” you asked.

Jihoon shrugged. “I chased him away for you. I’ve only heard bad stuff about that guy, like he sleeps with a new girl every weekend and doesn’t treat them right.”

You thought for a second, bottom lip slightly jutting out in concentration. “Well, couldn’t you have told me about his reputation then let me make the decision for myself?”

“I-” Jihoon started but stopped himself. He seemed to mull over your words for a bit, then sighed. “You’re right, I guess I could have, but you’ve been drinking, who knows if you would’ve made the right decision?”

This made you furrow your brows. “So what if I did? Getting drunk and going home with a rando is not unheard of, I would’ve been fine. Just maybe ashamed tomorrow morning.”

A flash of annoyance swept across Jihoon’s features, and your curiosity couldn’t help but be piqued. The two of you had had your fair share of aimless arguments over the months, but he’d never actually gotten cross with you. For some reason, you were suddenly itching to know what angry Jihoon was like.

“I wouldn’t be fine with it, though. I’d hate knowing that I let you go home with a prick like that.”

This wasn’t the first time Jihoon had fended off guys for you during a night out, but to his credit, they weren’t ever guys you wanted to talk to. And, well, admittedly, after learning what he was like, maybe you didn’t want to talk to Sunwoo either, but Jihoon’s protectiveness tonight was bothering you more than it ever had.

You let a silence stretch between the two of you before speaking again. “You- you can’t just do that, you know,” you declared, not meeting his eyes.

“Do what?”

“Act like you just did. Pretending to be my boyfriend just to get a guy away from me.” Jihoon was just staring at you silently, so you felt compelled to add, “You’re not actually my boyfriend, you know.”

Apparently, that was the wrong thing to say, because his jaw locked and a coldness you had never seen before appeared in his eyes.

“Aren’t I basically?”

That caught you off guard. Where was this coming from? Jihoon had never entertained the idea of being your boyfriend, ever, so why was he suddenly acting like he was? Like he had always been?

And yet, you found yourself toying with the idea of dating Jihoon once more. The one question that pervaded your thoughts was, would things be so different? You’d never had a boyfriend, so you weren’t sure what they did, but you thought it wouldn’t be too far off from how Jihoon treated you now. Keep you safe, bring you food, buy you random keychains or pencils that reminded him of you, text you throughout the day, compliment you. The only difference would be…

Your eyes drifted down to his lips, and you swore you heard a shaky intake of breath coming from the man right in front of you.

The thought had barely crossed your mind that panic rose in your chest. You could not be thinking about kissing Jihoon. You couldn’t think about him being your boyfriend, either. You weren’t sure why, but your sudden heart palpitations at the mere idea told you that you just couldn’t.

“No, you’re not.” You had wanted to speak firmly, but you feared your voice had come out shakier than intended.

To your surprise, Jihoon scoffed. “So if I went off and started dating someone else, it wouldn’t bother you?” he asked in a disbelieving, almost mocking tone.

“No, it wouldn’t,” you answered, and as soon as the words were out, you knew they were a lie. You scrambled to your feet, suddenly wanting to be away from this conversation and the way it made you feel. “I’ll, um, I’ll head back inside.”

You ignored his call of your name and picked up your dress, hastily sliding it back on as you made your way back towards the living room where most of the action was. You quickly found that it was too loud, too hot, too packed in there. You headed back outside through another door that led to a part of the backyard far from the pool, where people sat in small groups around a big fire, either nursing a drink or passing round a joint, the smell of weed heavy in the air. At least it was quiet here.

You walked around some before spotting Jaehyuk, the man of the house himself, sitting on his lonesome on a swing bench in a dark corner of the garden, looking down despondently into a red solo cup. A couple hours into the party, this was the first time you saw him, you realized. It made you wonder how long he’d been sitting out here on his own.

“Hey, Jaehyuk,” you greeted, catching him by surprise. You took a seat next to him, sliding your hands underneath your thighs to keep them warm.

“Oh, hey, Y/N. Nice that you came.” He mustered a smile for you before taking a swig from his cup and cringing at the taste of what must’ve been alcohol.

“What are you doing out here by yourself?” you asked softly. You were used to cheery, smiley Jaehyuk, and even though you weren’t very close, you couldn’t help but be saddened by seeing your friend in such a state.

Jaehyuk sighed deeply. “The girl I planned this party for isn’t here.”

“The girl you… planned… this party for?” you echoed, and he nodded. “You mean this,” you said, gesturing to the house and backyard full to the brim with people, “is all for one girl?”

He sighed and nodded again, taking another sip from his cup. He tutted at the drink, or maybe at himself for drinking it when he knew how awful it tasted. “I wanted an excuse to see her outside of class.” He chuckled. “I realize now that I might have gone slightly overboard.”

“Just a bit,” you laughed along, watching as a group of stoners cheered at their friend who had found marshmallows and sticks God-knows-where. “It’s not even midnight yet, she might still be coming.”

Jaehyuk shrugged. “I’ve stopped hoping. I think I just need to get into the party and forget about it for tonight.”

You smiled. “Sounds like a plan.”

“What about you, what made you escape out here? The music not to your liking?”

“Are you kidding? This is the Danish alternative pop playlist of my dreams,” you said, earning a chuckle from him. “No, I just…” You realized you didn’t even know how to talk about this. What was making you so upset?

“I got into a bit of a… squabble with my friend, if you will. He-”

“Oh, so it’s a he?” Jaehyuk cut in, a knowing smile on his face.

“No- I mean, yes, he is, but it’s not like that, it’s- it’s…”

“It’s?” he egged on.

“Ugh, fine, it might be like that,” you finally admitted, as much to Jaehyuk as to yourself. Your irritation made him laugh.

“It’s okay, it happens.”

“I didn’t think it would happen to me, though.”

“Why not?”

You sighed. “Just ‘cause… him and I, we’ve known each other for such a long time, it feels weird that things would start changing now.”

“How long have you known each other?”

“We met when we were thirteen and fourteen. Then he moved away and we only met again in September last semester.”

“Did you keep in touch?”

“Not so much. I just heard from him through my brother, they’re much closer.”

“So… what I’m hearing is, you’ve known each other a long time, but you’ve only really become friends since September, right?”

“Right,” you echoed dubitatively, wondering where Jaehyuk was going.

“Y/N, that’s just a bit over six months.”

“...So?”

“So, that’s not nearly as long as you make it out to be. It’s not like you’ve been best friends for years and things are suddenly changing. Six months… aren’t that short, I’ll give you that, but I think it’s a reasonable time for people to get closer as friends and then start developing feelings.”

“Feelings?” you immediately echoed, panic evident in your voice.

Jaehyuk let out something like a chuckle, looking at you like he was figuring out whether you were joking or not. “Is that not what this whole thing is about?”

You dropped your gaze down to your thighs, frowning. “Feelings just sound so serious…”

“They can be, but they don’t have to.” After a few seconds of silence, he noticed your upset expression and nudged your shoulder good-naturedly. “What’s worrying you so much?”

“It’s just confusing. I… It’s not like I’ve been totally indifferent towards him up ‘til now, but there’s something about him lately, especially tonight. It makes me actually wonder about… you know. Whether I want him as a friend or not.” You sighed. “And even if I am feeling… feelings, I don’t know how he sees me. I could still be a sort of little sister in his eyes, for all I know.”

“What makes you think that?”

A small smile grew on your lips as you blew air from your nose. “Junkyu - my older brother - tasked him with looking after me when he learned I was going to attend this university with him. So, while I go crazy trying to figure out why he acts the way he acts and why I feel the way I feel, he might just be keeping a promise to my brother.”

“But have you ever seen him as an older brother?”

“No,” you replied immediately. Your surety almost took you aback. “Jihoon is… Jihoon. He’s definitely not Junkyu.”

Jaehyuk smiled. “Then I don’t think he would see you as a little sister, either. The way you act with a sibling and with a friend, potentially someone you like, is very different. I don’t think there’d be room for question if he treated you as a younger sister, you’d just know. Most guys I know are very obvious when they like someone, me included, so if you’re thinking about this so much just because of the way he acts with you… well, you’re probably onto something.”

“You think?”

“I do.”

You and Jaehyuk stayed outside chatting for a few more minutes until you decided to go back inside for some warmth and a refill of your empty cups. In the kitchen, you ran into some of your classmates, so you joined in their animated discussion on which version of The Sims is better (Asahi offended everyone by saying the mobile app was the best) instead of going looking for Minjeong and Jihoon like you had intended to.

A few minutes later, as your phone buzzed with six consecutive texts from your roommate, you found out where both of them were.

minjeong girl do u know how many bedrooms there are in this goddamn house??!!!! yoshi and i are spending the night here xxx ask jaehyuk if he has a room for u or get home w jihoon whos that girl he’s talkin to in the kitchen btw??? love yaa xxxxxoooo text me if u need anything!! i’ll be busy but i’ll keep my phone on ;)

Usually, you’d have rolled your eyes at the exorbitant amount of x’s and the cheesy winky face, but something else had got your attention. Suddenly stepping away mentally from the conversation (which had turned into an interrogation on Asahi’s suspected addiction to mobile games), you looked around the crowded kitchen until your eyes settled on your culprit.

From where you were, you only had a view of his side profile, just as Minjeong had said, Jihoon was talking to a girl, red solo cup in his hand and stupidly attractive smile on his lips. She was leaning against the wall while he stood in front of her, both looking as relaxed as if they had known each other for years. What was up with all that eye contact? What was making them smile so hard?

You hadn’t realized how hard you were staring until Jaehyuk’s voice broke through your thoughts, asking if you were okay.

“You look like you want to kill someone,” Sumin joked, not knowing she was closer to the truth than she thought.

You tried to laugh it off, saying you were just deeply disturbed by Asahi’s predicament, but you couldn’t keep yourself from glancing back at Jihoon and the girl every thirty seconds. Another girl arrived, and Jihoon shifted to make room for her so that he was now directly facing you. Over the chatter of the kitchen and music booming from the speakers in the living room, you couldn’t hear anything they were saying, but it seemed like Girl #1 was introducing Jihoon to Girl #2, placing a palm on his bicep as she did so. You counted - that hand stayed there for four whole seconds, and when she finally took it off of him, your eyes drifted back to Jihoon’s face.

Jihoon, who was staring right at you. Jihoon, who raised his eyebrows at you as if to say, What about it? while yours were creased in - confusion, anger, you weren’t sure what, but an ugly feeling you weren’t accustomed to. Jihoon, who, you decided, had to know what he was doing, had to know how this was making you feel.

The only thing on your mind was getting out of here and taking Jihoon with you. Without thinking much, you fished your phone out of your sweater pocket, texted Jihoon Let’s go and said bye to your friends, lying that your friend had suddenly asked you to leave.

After a few minutes of waiting by yourself outside in the cold, crouching to maximize body warmth, you started to wonder if Jihoon had decided to not follow you. But when you felt a weight drop on your shoulders, you snapped your head up to find him smiling down at you.

“Where did you get this?” you asked, meaning the blanket he had given you.

“I stole it from the living room.”

“Jihoon,” you scolded.

“You know the guy right? Just give it back to him this week,” he said, lowering himself down to your level. Similarly to your eye contact in the kitchen, you were still frowning while he kept on smiling. “Not like you to want to leave before one a.m.. Is something the matter?” he asked, and you debated whether he was faking his innocence or not.

For about ten seconds, you tried to stay quiet, not wanting to betray your feelings to him. You glared ahead of you, watching your breath form wisps in the late February night air.

But then he called your name so softly, it undid all of your resolve. The sound of it made you sigh.

“Who was that you were talking to?” you finally asked, voice barely above a whisper.

“Hm? That was just Shuhua, she’s a Tawainese exchange student from one of my classes. Then she introduced me to her friend Yuqi.”

You nodded slowly, still not meeting Jihoon’s gaze. “I didn’t know there was a Taiwainese exchange student in one of your classes.”

“Y/N?” The unexpected seriousness with which he had called your name forced you to look at him.

“Hm.”

“I have something to tell you.” He must’ve noticed your sudden inability to speak, so he continued, lowering his head to be at eye-level with you. “There’s a Taiwainese exchange student in one of my classes.”

A smile broke through his serious facade and you had to look away to hide your own growing grin. “You’re stupid,” you said, but it only made Jihoon laugh.

“So is that what this is all about? A little bout of jealousy from my Y/N?”

You didn’t know what to focus on - the fact that he had finally put a name to what you were feeling or the face that he had called you his. It made you frown. “I wasn’t jealous,” you said, aware of how unbelievable you sounded.

“No? Then what made you want to leave so suddenly?”

“I- You-” you started, glaring at Jihoon when he snickered. “How come I can’t talk to guys but it’s okay for you to talk to girls?”

“So you are jealous.”

“No, I just think you’re being unfair. I’m calling you out on your hypocrisy, Hoon. Double standards and all that.”

Jihoon grinned. Had he known that he’d get such a reaction from you after talking to a friend that happened to be a girl, he’d have done it much earlier. And yet you had never had a problem with any of the girls in his usual friend group - if anything, the bunch of you often ganged up against him - so he wondered what was wrong with Shuhua in particular. Was it because you didn’t know her, and misunderstanding could arise?

His smile and eyes softened. No matter how adorable you looked to him right now, he wasn’t one to play games with feelings, his or yours. It was hard enough to make you realize how much he liked you (although he hoped that scene at the pool had made things more apparent), so he wasn’t going to make it even more confusing by letting you think he might like someone else.

Earlier, when he’d asked you if him dating someone else would bother you, and you’d answered no, he hadn’t formed any plan whatsoever to go off and talk to another girl right in front of you. Things just happened in his favor. He’d been talking with a whole group of people in the kitchen, but save for Jennifer, they’d all left for a game of spin the bottle (at their grown college age). Shuhua had a boyfriend back home and he had you, so they both had no interest for it. So it was just the two of them bonding over their love for Taylor Swift’s music when you appeared in the kitchen with Jaehyuk.

Did he also feel a pang of jealousy seeing you with another guy, even though it was just Jaehyuk and he already knew of your friendship? Perhaps, but this wasn’t anything new with Jihoon. He didn’t think he’d be able to get rid of it until he had the surety that you were his, which had felt like a faraway goal until recently. Maybe it was due to his growing boldness or maybe you had managed to piece everything together yourself, but he was sure he’d felt a shift in your attitude towards him lately. There were times you would get shyer than usual, refusing to look him in the eyes; other times, like tonight, you’d defy him, as if trying to prove to both him and yourself you didn’t feel any sort of way towards him. But he hadn’t missed the way your eyes had drifted down to his lips and stayed there for a few seconds, hadn’t missed your panic when things seemed to get too real.

Just like you, although he didn’t know about that, he also found that there was something different about tonight, some tension between the two of you that was bound to explode. The fact that you were both in swimsuits had probably not helped. As soon as he’d seen you in your black tube dress, his imagination had started running wild. The way you casually had a gray zip sweatshirt of his in your room and donned it before leaving your place had made it harder to not just keep you in your apartment while the others went off to the party, and seeing you in your bikini was like the final boss he hadn’t been able to defeat. Keeping his eyes off of you was simply impossible. He wasn’t sure how he had resisted kissing you right then and there, showing everyone who the prettiest girl in the room - hell, at this party - belonged to.

(Jihoon had a bit of a possessive streak.)

Even now that you had somewhat made up, he still felt the changed air around you, like there was no going back from here. No pretending there were no unsaid feelings anymore - at least, that’s how he felt. If you needed the extra push to realize either his feelings, your own, or both, he didn’t mind initiating it. If anything, he had been waiting for it.

So he made sure to clear things up. “I didn’t want you to talk to Sunwoo because I knew he had bad intentions. Or at least selfish ones. Shuhua has a boyfriend, nothing was gonna happen there.”

“Oh, but if she didn’t, something would’ve?”

“No, Y/N. No,” Jihoon said firmly.

“Why not? She’s pretty.” You knew you were being unreasonable at this point, arguing for the sake of arguing, but you couldn’t help yourself.

Jihoon sighed before placing a hand at the top of your head, brushing your hair gently. “I know someone who’s prettier.”

You turned your head slowly to look at him and were met with a sight you forever wanted to keep in your heart. Jihoon was looking down at you, eyes soft and filled with an emotion you wanted to describe as adoration, corners of his lips upturned into a sweet smile. You wanted to reach out and touch his cheek, feel the warmth of his skin under your palm and make sure he was real, but you were too stuck in his gaze to move.

“I actually know the prettiest girl in the world. I’m very lucky.”

You continued staring at each other for a few seconds or maybe a few hours, until he booped your nose and stood up. “Our Uber’s here, pretty girl.”

You took his extended hand in yours and let him help you up, still in a daze as he opened the car door for you and rushed to the other side. You didn’t expect the relief you felt when he took your hand in his again as the Uber started driving. As the driver and him made minimal small talk, you watched out the window, but you couldn’t hear or see anything - you could only focus on Jihoon’s fingers intertwined with yours. Had hand-holding always felt so natural?

Even once you reached your apartment and you had to let go of it to get out of the car, the only thing you wanted was to have it again.

You didn’t notice right away, as you punched in the code for the entrance to your apartment building, that Jihoon had stayed behind on the pavement. A light rain had started and his hair, all curled up from the pool, shone with small beads of water that the streetlights reflected on.

“Aren’t you coming up?” you asked, turning around to face him and leaning against the door so it wouldn’t close.

“Not tonight,” he simply said, and you hesitated to ask him why. Whatever it was, he must have his reason, and you would see him again soon anyway, so you dropped it.

“Okay.” You nodded and hoped you didn’t sound as disappointed as you felt.

You thought that would be it, but then he took a step closer to you, then another, until he was standing right in front of you. The doorstep made you taller so that your eyes were on a parallel with his lips, on which they naturally fell. No matter how confusing tonight might have been, if what you thought was about to happen actually did happen, you knew there was not a cell in your body that would resist it.

Jihoon leaned in closer and closer, until he was right there, and your lips would touch any second - but he leaned to the right, pressing a kiss to the corner of your lips instead. You stood with bated breath as he leaned back, wearing a proud smirk. “Good to know you wouldn’t push me away if I tried to kiss you,” he said, but on this rare occasion, you were speechless.

His smirk softened to a smile as he ruffled your hair. “Good night, Y/N.”

It wasn’t until he had reached the corner, turning around and waving at you to go into your building before disappearing that you snapped out of it and made your way to your apartment. As soon as you’d shut your front door behind you, you realized just how disappointed you felt that Jihoon hadn’t come up like he usually did, how much you missed the reassurance of having him there, even if the two of you were a room apart.

You also realized you didn’t want any walls to separate you anymore.

And there you had it - the signs were too obvious to ignore anymore. The heart flutterings, the thoughts of him invading your mind day and night, the jealousy. The constant longing to be with him.

You were in love with Park Jihoon.

You fell into a deep sleep for about four hours, before waking up with a start.

You were in love with Park Jihoon.

What had seemed like a comforting thought at the time now freaked you out to no end. Park Jihoon was your best friend, your brother’s best friend, someone you’d met so long ago he’d known you during your embarrassing bangs phase of 2015 (BangGate, as your friends from home inappropriately liked to call it).

You were great as friends, sure, but how would you fare if things went further than that? There was no way for you to know other than by trying it firsthand. Did you want to take that leap, and risk falling face first - or chance falling right into his arms?

For some reassurance, you got your laptop out and went to Google. At first, you intended to search some YouTube videos or blog posts about successful best-friends-turned-lovers stories, but something deep inside your brain compelled you to type Omegle in the search bar. Even if it was five a.m. for you, it’d be a reasonable time of the day for people with good relationship advice somewhere, right?

In your interests, you typed love, relationship and advice, hoping this would lead you to your savior. After skipping a few naked men who apparently were into love too, two young girls appeared on your screen who, going off of their accent, were British. They looked about eleven and were doing their nails, not paying attention to their screen. NewJeans was playing in the background.

They were perfect.

“Hey, girls!” you said, cringing at the sound of your own voice.

They raised their heads in unison, looking at you for a second before coming closer to the screen, all wide smiles. One of them had braces with pink elastics. “Hey, girl!”

You decided you had no time to lose, so you directly told them you needed advice with a boy you liked. They nodded vigorously. So you told them everything - from how you and Jihoon had met, to reconnecting in September, to the events of the past few months (including a detailed rundown of what happened at the pool, which they loved). They even insisted on seeing a picture and squealed when you showed them. Your Jihoon really was handsome.

“So? What do you think I should do?” you asked when you were done recounting everything.

“I have this thing I do whenever I fancy someone,” the girl on the right started, while the other one munched on some sour candy. You nodded for her to continue. “It really helps me know if I should keep fancying them or if they’re not worth it. It’s called a compibi- compa- combali- Rosie, what was it again?”

“A compatibility test,” Rosie said, tongue blue from her candy.

“Right, that. It works like magic. Just the other week I thought for sure Leo was the cutest boy in school but then I did the test thing and got forty percent with him and a few days later he was dating Sarah anyway.”

“Sarah is terrible,” Rosie chipped in.

“Oh no!” you exclaimed.

“Yeah, really bad,” the other girl said, nodding. “But then, I did it with Martin and got eighty-six percent and we’ve been dating for ten days now, we have,” she finished proudly.

“That’s amazing.” You didn’t know if it was the lack of sleep or the conviction with which the girl spoke, but you were hooked. “How do I do it?” you asked, although you’d probably done it when you were their age too.

“Oh, it’s easy. You just type the comp- Rosie?”

“Compatibility.”

“That, test on Google and click any one of them and type in your name then his. Any of them will do, I’m sure,” she shrugged, reaching for a candy.

“Okay, let me do it right now. Gimme a sec.” After a few clicks, you’d reached an early 2010s-style website called lovecalculator.com, all pink and cupids shooting their arrows into the sky. You typed in your name, then Jihoon’s, then pressed a shaky finger to the Enter bar.

“Oh my gosh!” you squealed. “We got ninety-nine percent!”

“Oh my gosh!” the girls yelped back, clapping and hugging each other in celebration.

“Girl, you need to go tell him right now,” non-Rosie said firmly.

“Right now,” Rosie echoed.

You pouted. “I can’t, it’s five a.m. right now.”

“You better go later then! You two are meant to be! You’ll last at least like, a month or two.”

“At least.”

After thanking and saying good-bye to your new best friends, you spent a good three minutes staring at the big 99% in bright pink on your screen. This randomly generated number made you so happy that you took a screenshot and printed it out on Minjeong’s printer in the living room, then put it on your fridge for you to admire. You used a magnet Jihoon had gifted you for Christmas - it was a four-cut photobooth picture of you two you’d taken at the Christmas market. You thought you’d only taken the paper version, but he’d made you go get food for the both of you while he bought the magnet version as well.

Your mind at ease, you started heading back to your room, but you ran into someone right as you walked out of the kitchen.

You looked him up and down. Yoshinori was standing in your living room half-naked, looking like a deer caught in headlights.

“H-hey, Y/N,” he said, breaking the silence first. “I’m sorry, I thought you were sleeping…”

“I woke up early,” you replied, unable to keep yourself from smiling at his awkwardness. “What are you doing?”

“Just, um, just getting some water.”

“And you have to come to my apartment to do that?”

“No, I, um- Someone called the cops, so Jaehyuk kicked all of us out.”

“I thought you were in a room somewhere?”

“Yeah, but we went outside to see what was happening, and he saw us, so we had to leave.”

“Right… Well, glad you made it back home safe.” The strangeness of the situation suddenly hit you, and you realized you should probably let the half-naked man get his glass of water and leave. “I’ll go back to my room, then.”

“Oh, right, see you, Y/N. And sorry.”

“No worries!” you said, waving his apology off and scurried off to your bedroom. You plopped into your bed with a satisfied sigh, hugging a plushie Jihoon had won for you at an arcade close to your chest. He really was everywhere.

When you woke up next, sunlight was pouring from the window into your room. You checked your phone - nine a.m.. Not early enough to go to late sleeper Jihoon’s place, but definitely early enough to call your probably still sleeping brother. You had to tell someone about your newfound revelation, and Minjeong next door was either asleep or busy.

Your phone rang with an outgoing call for so long that you thought Junkyu might simply not pick up. “I’m in love with Jihoon,” you blurted out as soon as your brother’s face appeared on screen.

He paused for a second, taking your words in, then yawned and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. “Good morning to you too, Y/N.”

“I’m in love with Jihoon,” you repeated, more insistently.

“I heard you the first time.”

“Well, what do you think?!” you asked, impatience rising. You couldn’t believe your brother could be sarcastic in an emergency like this.

Junkyu frowned. “Uh, congratulations?”

You tutted. “Kyu, I’m serious about this!”

“I know, I can tell,” he said, chuckling. “Are you going to tell him?”

“I think I have to. I think… I think he feels the same way about me, actually.”

Junkyu rolled his eyes. “No shit, Sherlock.”

You paused. “Huh?”

“Everyone and their mom knows he’s in love with you, we were just all waiting for you to see it.”

“Huh?!” Junkyu shrugged. “Why didn’t anyone tell me?”

Your brother sighed. “Some things in life, you have to figure out on your own, sis. Like taxes.” You just frowned at him. “Well, how did you figure it out?”

“Now that you say it, I guess I should’ve noticed it earlier. But really what happened is I saw him talking to a girl.”

“Put the man in jail!”

“Shut up. And then we talked for a bit, and he didn’t outright say it, but he heavily implied that he… liked me.”

Junkyu scoffed. “That’s an understatement.”

You ignored your brother. “But I don’t know if I should wait for a bit or go tell him now-”

“Y/N. Please, put that man out of his misery and go tell him now.”

“Don’t you think he’d get upset if I confessed first? You know Jihoon, he gets proud about random things like that.”

“Believe me, he won’t care. He’ll just be happy you like him back after all this time.”

You thought for a second, a small smile blooming on your lips. “Does he really like me that much?”

Junkyu sighed. “He’s been harping on about you since we were fourteen. He probably keeps a diary or a boyblog where he just writes about you. Just go get him, girl.”

Your smile grew wider and your heart started beating faster, excitement growing in your stomach at the thought of seeing Jihoon again. “Okay, I will.” You and your brother stared at each other for a second, eyes wide in anticipation, until something struck you.

“Wait… You don’t mind, do you? Your sister and best friend dating?”

“I l-word both of you, so no, I don’t mind. I trust you both enough to not hurt each other. But I’m still your brother, so if that prick does anything to hurt you, I’ll kick his ass, okay?”

“Kyu, he bench-presses your weight as a joke.”

He squinted his eyes at you. “I’ll metaphorically kick his ass, then.”

“And what if I hurt him?”

Junkyu thought for a second. “I’ll… give you the silent treatment for a few days.”

“How scary,” you laughed.

“Anyways, congratulations in advance and all that, but for my mental health please pretend you’re not a couple in front of me and remember that premarital sex is a sin.”

“Will do! Bye, Kyu!”

Right after hanging up with your brother, you texted Jihoon, asking if you could come over. You quickly got ready, doing affirmations in the mirror to calm yourself down, and as soon as your phone pinged with Jihoon’s answer (miss me already?), you were out the door. It was usually a thirteen-minute walk between your and Jihoon’s place, but with the power of love, it only took you eight.

You felt like your body had gone on autopilot - instead of practicing over and over what you would say to him in your head, imagining all the terrible ways it could go or pacing back and forth in front of his apartment building, you just walked, the loud thumping of your heart in your ears drowning everything else out. You’d just get there and get it over with.

Even when you had to wait for seven seconds (you counted) for Jihoon to open the door after you’d rung the doorbell, you didn’t start panicking.

“Hey, Y/N, I just ordered some-”

“I love you.”

“Breakfast… You what?”

“I love you, Hoonie,” you beamed. The relief of letting those words free made tears pool in the corner of your eyes.

Jihoon just stared at you, mouth agape and expression like he couldn’t believe what was hearing. Reaching for your hand, he brought you closer to him and shut the door behind you, eyes never once leaving yours. Then, he pulled you into a hug, one so tight you’d be worried about your blood circulation being cut off if it wasn’t Jihoon’s arms you were in.

“Can you say it again, please?” he asked, nose buried in your hair and voice weak like you’d never heard it before.

You tightened your hold around his waist. “I love you,” you whispered.

“Again?”

“I love you,” you repeated, giggling.

He laughed too, more out of relief than anything. “I love you, too.”

He leaned back and raised his hands to gently cup your face in his palms. The both of you were smiling like idiots from ear to ear, gazing into each other’s eyes. Tears streamed down your cheek and he wiped them away with a thumb before pressing a soft kiss to your forehead.

“Took you long enough,” he said, making you laugh again.

“I know, I’m sorry.”

Jihoon shook his head. “Don’t be. You have no idea how happy I am right now.”

“I’m happy for you guys and all, but could you like, not do this here?” a voice interrupted you. You looked behind Jihoon’s shoulder to find Hyunsuk, one of his roommates, on the living room sofa, watching Brooklyn 99. You hadn’t even noticed him. In his defense, you were declaring your love for each other right next to him in the entrance hallway.

“Oh, right, sorry, Suk. Let’s go into my room,” he said, tugging at your hand.

The both of you burst into giggles as soon as the door shut behind you. Jihoon wasted no time in pulling you into another hug, and it felt like your whole body sighed as you let his warmth engulf you. You cursed yourself for not letting yourself have this earlier. You gently rocked from side to side together, as if slow dancing to a melody only the two of you could hear.

“I guess a little jealousy goes a long way, huh?” Jihoon said after a minute of silence.

“I wasn’t jealous,” you huffed, leaning back so he could see your frown.

“What made you realize your undying love for me, then?”

“I just… I thought we’d be good together. I realized how compatible we are, if you will.”

“Our compatibility? Did you only notice it last night?”

You grinned. “Guess I did,” you answered, just to tease him. Jihoon did not need to know about your love calculator epiphany.

He looked at you like you had hung the stars in the sky. You felt shy under his gaze, but you couldn’t get yourself to look away. “So does that mean we’re… boyfriend and girlfriend now?” he asked, making you burst into laughter. “Don’t make fun of me! It’s important to make things clear,” he complained between giggles.

“Yes, let’s be boyfriend and girlfriend.”

“Awesome,” he replied, then pursed his lips as if debating to say what he wanted to say next. “So, now that we’re boyfriend and girlfriend…”

“Yes, Hoon?”

“Does that mean I can kiss you?” he asked, a small smile playing on his lips that you mirrored.

“Please,” you whispered.

So he did.

When his lips touched yours, it was like a flower that had been waiting for the right moment finally bloomed inside your chest. It felt soft, and comforting, and just right. Like your lips had always meant to meet.

At least, it started out that way. The fabric of Jihoon’s t-shirt bunched up in your hands while his cupped your face tenderly, your lips moving in a slow cadence against each other’s as if you had all the time in the world - and you did. You were both so filled to the brim with excitement that when you pulled away for a breather, you laughed together, foreheads resting against each other.

But then, you raised your hands and threaded your fingers through his hair, tugging on it gently as you deepened the kiss. You probably hadn’t done it on purpose, simply wanting to feel more of Jihoon out of some basic instinct - but it undid something in him.

He slid his hands down the sides of your neck and your shoulders until they reached your arms, pulling on them to have your body closer to his. His hands then continued their journey down to your waist, where they sneaked themselves under your t-shirt. They ran up and up until almost your entire back was exposed to the fresh air in his room, the contrast between that and the fire-hot warmth of Jihoon’s hands against your bare skin making you shiver.

He walked you backwards until the back of your legs hit his mattress, unto which he helped you down gently, somehow not breaking the kiss as he did. One of his hands came to brush hair away from your face, while the other remained on your waist, after some time venturing onto your stomach, a sensitive spot for you that made you sigh into his mouth. He took that opportunity to slide his tongue against yours, yet another new sensation that made your head spin.

This was exceeding any expectations you had ever had for a first kiss. In fact, you had always thought first kisses were messy, awkward things, but this was nothing of the sort - your whole body was on edge, responding to every little movement on Jihoon’s part. Your fingers buzzed with a fizzy electricity that put your brain in a daze. You could do this forever, you thought.

But forever was cut short by the sudden buzz of Jihoon’s phone. Jihoon started, practically leaping off of you and dramatically holding onto his chest when he realized it was just his phone that had interrupted you. The delivery person was calling him to announce their arrival.

Jihoon pressed a kiss to your forehead, took a few steps, then came back to press another kiss, this time to your lips. Your stomach growled loudly while you waited for him, and you realized you still hadn’t eaten today. Add making out to that, you were ready to devour whatever it was Jihoon had ordered.

The smell coming from the paper bag Jihoon held as he entered the room again made you close your eyes in bliss and take a deep whiff. “Johnny’s,” you whispered. “You know me so well.”

Johnny’s was your absolute favorite breakfast place in all of town. It had been opened a few years ago by a graduate of your university who had mastered the art of hangover food. From soups, to hash brown patties, to iced coffee, he knew exactly what it was that students needed after a night out. You could tell he had a lot of experience with that himself. He was kind of like a God amongst the student body of your university.

“Of course I do. I know your order from all of your favorite restaurants, and somehow you only realized yesterday that I was pathetically in love with you.”

You smiled sheepishly, taking a bite of your sausage and egg wrap. “How long are you going to hold this over my head?”

Jihoon grinned brightly. “Until I forget about it.”

“So never?”

“Precisely.”

He put on the next episode of your show, and for the next couple hours, the two of you stayed holed up in his room, cuddling once you were done with your food. Even though you had spent endless time watching shows or movies side by side, neither of you had ever dared initiate physical touch, no matter how much you’d wanted to. He’d been scared you’d pull away from him, and you’d been scared it’d be awkward. You hadn’t realized how much you’d longed for his proximity and warmth until you had it.

Save for his laptop screen, it’d been quiet for a while, and you thought you might fall asleep when Jihoon spoke. “I’m so glad I don’t need to pretend anymore,” he said as one episode finished and the next one started.

“Pretend what?”

“That I’m not desperately in love with you and that every single little thing you do doesn’t drive me insane.”

You giggled. “Does it?”

“Yes,” he whispered, his voice a heavy sigh, almost a groan. There was a slight edge to it, a deeper meaning behind that short yes that had your stomach suddenly feeling very tight.

“Oh,” was all you could answer. You suddenly wondered what you might have done without thinking that had had an effect on Jihoon, just as he’d done to you many times before. You also wondered what sort of effect you may have had on him, what sort of thoughts he may have had about you that he had to keep to himself all this time.

Tentatively, you cocked your head up, only to find he was already looking down at you. The glint in his eyes made your body burn. Just as he started to lean in to reunite your lips, your phone buzzed with many texts in a row. Jihoon closed his eyes in frustration and sighed. “I want to throw both of our phones away,” he said, making you laugh.

minjeong hey pooks idk if ur out somewhere or still sleeping but im going to yoshis placeee he needs some stuff there so we’re going together and i’ll prob spend the night over… we’re like inseparable rn or wtv. anyways dont set the place on fire while i’m gone x

you ok thx for letting me know xx im w my boyfriend rn

Minjeong’s response didn’t even take three seconds to come through.

minjeong HUHHHH??? GIRL ???

you hehe

minjeong park jihoon is one lucky man

you how do u know its him?

minjeong literally who else would it be wait does that mean we’ll go on double dates…

you yeah ur right and pls no

minjeong DOUBLE DATES !! girls night tomorrow night i want all the deeeets have fun having the place all to urselves and rmb to use protection xx

you why is that where ur mind goes first ?? down for girls night tho can we watch teen beach movie

minjeong duhhh

“Teen Beach Movie?” Jihoon said, startling you. You hadn’t realized he’d been reading over your shoulders.

“It’s a good movie,” you mumbled, frowning.

“Right.” He said nothing for a few seconds, but he just couldn’t contain himself. The question was burning his tongue. “Aren’t you on the pill?”

Your head snapped towards him at the sudden question. “Uh, yeah, I am. Why?”

His eyes scanned your face as a smirk grew on his lips. “Then we don’t need to use protection, do we?”

You gulped. Your whole face felt hot - after having just shared your first kiss, you hadn’t expected him to mention sex so easily. Not that you weren’t interested in that, far from it, you were just… nervous.

You turned away from him, unable to sustain his gaze any longer. “I guess not,” you murmured. You had started taking the pill at the beginning of university, mainly to regulate your period and lessen your hormonal acne. The contraceptive part was just a bonus, one you had never imagined would come into handy like this.

Jihoon’s eyes suddenly widened. “Oh, I need to tell Yoshi about this! He’s gonna freak. I hope he won’t be mad he learned it from Minjeong and not me first.”

“Yoshi?” you asked as you watched him reach for his phone on his nightstand.

“Yeah, we’ve been updating each other on our love lives. He’s really into Minjeong, by the way.”

“That’s… strangely wholesome, actually.”

While he typed away, you tilted your head and took the time to appreciate your boyfriend’s features. The round eyes, heart-shaped lips, sharp nose and even sharper jawline. He was so pretty, and now, he was all yours.

Without thinking, you traced a finger along his jaw, liking the feel of it against your skin. When his eyes found yours, you dropped your hand and straightened your head, expression like you’d just been caught red-handed.

“Should we go back to your place? We can pick up food on the way.”

You smiled. “We just ate.”

“And I’m hungry again,” he said, mirroring your smile and pressing a chaste kiss to your lips. Or at least, he had intended it as a chaste kiss, but he found that he couldn’t quite get himself to pull away. “Let’s go,” he said, lips moving against yours as he spoke, but made no move to actually go.

“Let’s go,” you repeated, staying perfectly still. You’re not sure who was the one to cross the millimeters between your lips, but before you knew it, you and Jihoon’s lips were stuck to each other once more. This kiss had none of the gradual intensity of the previous one - right off the bat, the feeling of Jihoon’s lips against yours flooded all of your senses.

Your hands found purchase in his hair while his found their way to your waist once more. With surprising ease, he pulled you to him so that you were straddling his lap. For a second there, you were conscious about how heavy you might be on top of him, but it was all forgotten when he pressed his lips to yours again in a passionate kiss. In this new position, you could press your body close to his, so close you could almost feel his heart beat against yours. He also had easier access to your back than before, and he quickly took advantage of that.

Just like before, he sneaked his hands underneath your t-shirt, making you arch your back against him. He slid a finger underneath your bra strap and pulled away for a second to ask if this was okay. You looked at him - his eyes were darker than you’d ever seen before and his face had lust written all over it. You were sure you looked similar.

“Yeah, it’s okay,” you whispered before diving back into the kiss. One second apart felt like hours to you.

Your breath got shakier as he unclasped your bra. He didn’t do anything right away, settling on brushing his palm up and down your back while your heart raced with anticipation. You were so on edge that you couldn’t even kiss him anymore - you buried your face in his neck, gripping his hair so tightly you were probably hurting him. You didn’t care if he could feel how desperate you were. Then, finally, painfully slowly, one of his hands made its way to your front, and he gently grabbed your breast underneath your bra that was hanging from your shoulders. That was already a foreign sensation in itself, but when he took your nipple between two fingers and pulled on it ever-so-gently, the pleasure that overtook your body was so intense that it made you let out a loud gasp and you pulled away from Jihoon, startled as if you had been shocked by lightning.

“Are you okay?” he asked, breathing heavily, a mix of worry and desire in his eyes.

You nodded, holding onto his shoulders as you tried to make your breathing return to normal. “I’m fine, just… it’s all very new, is all. I’ve never done any of this before.”

Never had a boyfriend, never held hands romantically, never kissed - that was you. Not that you minded, though, since you’d never been interested in anyone and you were happy to do this with Jihoon, whom you trusted more than anyone else.

He smiled softly. “That’s okay. Does it at least feel good?” he asked, low voice making the hairs on your arms stand.

You whined, hiding your face in the dip of his shoulder again. “It does…” you admitted, voice muffled against his skin.

“You know, it’s my first time too,” he said after a while.

You lifted your head to look at him. “Really?”

“Mh-hm. You’re my first girlfriend.” His eyes were full of affection as he gazed at you, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. You giggled. “What’s funny?” he asked softly, pressing a kiss to your jaw.

“We’re each other’s firsts,” you explained. “I think that’s nice.”

Jihoon made his way to your lips, giving them a small peck. “That is nice. And I promise I’ll make you feel so good,” another peck, “you’ll want me to be your last as well.”

You looked at him for a bit, taking in his features that looked even more beautiful to you now that you’d realized your feelings for him, and thought of a life with him. It might have been slightly premature, but you already knew you liked the idea of that.

“Okay,” you said, as if what he had said had been an offer. It made him smile.

“Okay.” He kissed you, softly like you could break underneath his touch. “You’re so cute, you know that?” he asked against your lips, but didn’t leave you time to answer before kissing you again. “Okay, I think we should take a break,” he said after a few minutes. “We can go to your place. And then we’ll have more… privacy.”

You agreed that spending some time not pressed up against Jihoon might help you think straight again. The walk to your apartment was nice and quiet, your interlocked hands swinging back and forth between your two bodies. When you walked past the grocery store, you stopped in your tracks, looking at Jihoon with a smile which he mirrored immediately, even without knowing the reason behind it.

“Should we bake a cake to celebrate our first day together?”

“That’s very cheesy.” His grin widened as he took a step closer to you. “I love it.” He pressed a kiss to your forehead and led you into the store.

The rest of that afternoon was spent baking and decorating the cake. It was a simple vanilla batter, but it took way longer than it should have, because Jihoon first insisted on having a flour fight (which took ages to clean), then on having two cakes and having a competition for whose would be prettier (yours, of course), but you loved every last second of it. It was like a scene out of a movie, and you could not have been more content. To really bring home the cheesiness of it all, you even recorded yourselves blowing out the number one candles of your respective cakes.

The evening came around, and, full of cake and Chinese takeout, you were holed up in bed together, watching the first movie that had popped up on your Netflix recommended. It was too easy, falling asleep in his arms. The combination of his comforting scent and the soft back rubs he was giving you lulled you to sleep like nothing else.

When you woke up next, it was because of a sudden lack of warmth next to you. You lifted your head to find Jihoon opening your bedroom door and heading into the living room. He had just been going to get water, but you didn’t know that.

“Hoon?” you called out, raising yourself to a sitting position on your bed. He immediately turned around, walking back towards you and crouching next to your bed.

“Hm?”

“Aren’t you staying?” you asked, reaching for the hem of his t-shirt sleeve. He looked at your hand before his gaze slowly made its way back up towards your face, a smirk growing on his pretty lips.

“Do you want me to?” he asked back, gazing deep into your eyes. His voice had dropped to a low volume that made it hard to breathe. Initially, you’d just wanted him back by your side, but now all sorts of thoughts were running through your mind.

“Of course. I mean, we’re dating, right?”

In an attempt to lighten the atmosphere, you tried to chuckle, but all laughter died in your throat when your eyes locked with Jihoon’s. You weren’t scared of his intensity - you were scared of the pace at which your desire for him was growing. One inch closer, and you knew you’d be wrapped around his finger.

He leaned closer.

“What are you trying to say?” he asked, tilting his head innocently to the side. Mindlessly, you rubbed your thighs together, searching for some relief for your core that had started to throb of its own accord, but Jihoon was following your every movement and had noticed it. “Are you saying you want to consummate our relationship?” he asked again, a hint of amusement in his voice as he placed his hands on your knee that wasn’t covered by the blanket.

You scoffed and looked away, hoping you didn’t look as flustered as you felt. “Not if you say it like that,” you mumbled.

Jihoon’s eyebrows perked up. “How should I say it, then?” he whispered. His hand slowly brushed along your sides until it reached your waist. Even over your layer of clothing, his touch burned. “You want me to make love to you?”

You kept your gaze fixed on something behind his shoulder, focusing on your breathing that was getting shakier and shakier. He drew the blanket away, leaving your thighs exposed to the chilly air for a second before he splayed his large palms on them, bringing you some warmth but intensifying the throbbing in your core. His hands inched closer and closer to where you most needed them, rubbing over your inner thighs but swerving right before he actually reached your core, setting them on your hip bones instead.

“Or do you want me to fuck you, Y/N?”

He took your chin between two fingers, forcing you to meet his gaze. Your eyes locked for a second before they dropped to his lips, watching the smirk that grew on them. “Guess it’s the latter.”

As soon as your lips touched, you were overwhelmed by the immensity of your desire for him. Your whole body burned in want, in need. You had no idea what to do except hold on tightly to him and hope for the best, hope that he’d know how to guide you through this even if it was new for him as well.

If you thought the kisses you’d shared earlier in the day had been intense, this one was on a whole other level. Your hands grabbed everywhere they could find and his gripped your waist firmly as your tongues danced with each other, resulting in a messy kiss that had your head spinning from lack of air in seconds. And yet, you couldn’t get enough. You kept pulling Jihoon impossibly closer by the hem of his t-shirt until he got frustrated from the layer of clothing between you two and simply took it off, discarding somewhere in your room. He gave you no time to admire his defined chest or abs, because he trapped your lips right away.

He pushed you slowly onto the bed until he was hovering over you, alternating between kissing your lips and your neck, that you were sure would have a couple of purple marks for you to find the next day. Your skin burned wherever he touched it, and it was like a trail of fire had appeared as his hand made its way to your breasts once more, grabbing harshly at the soft flesh there.

The whole time, he had been in some sort of a trance, drunk on your body, on your scent, on the way you were touching him - on the feeling that you finally wanted him as much as he’d wanted you all this time. But when he helped you out of the articles of clothing covering your upper body, and he had you half-naked underneath him, he had to take a double take and remember to take his time instead of just devouring you whole. For both his sake and yours.

So he stopped for a bit, letting himself admire you. He noticed you shifting uncomfortably, so he leaned down again, pressing soft kisses along your cheeks and your jaw. “You really are the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen,” he whispered before kissing you. He then continued his journey down your neck and collarbones until he reached your breast. “Really so beautiful.”

When he took one of your nipples in his mouth, your back arched against him and you let out a loud moan. He couldn’t keep himself from chuckling slightly - he found it adorable how sensitive you were everywhere he touched you. Your moans were like music to his ears.

Nothing had ever felt like this before. As he circled his tongue around your nipple - God knows where he had learned how to do this - it took everything you had to not just scream in pleasure. Even if Minjeong was out, you still had neighbors. Now that you couldn’t grab his t-shirt, you’d switched to his hair, and you were tugging at it so hard you wouldn’t have been surprised if you ripped a clump of it from his head.

Your panties were sticking to your core, all slick with your arousal, and you didn’t know how long you could go on anymore without attention down there.

As if he’d heard your thoughts, Jihoon started making his way down your body once more, trailing kisses all across your ribcage and stomach.

“I’m torn between taking this real slow and making it last as long as possible.” His lips found a sensitive spot on your lower stomach, right next to your hip bone, and he gently bit the skin there, licking it afterwards to offer you some relief. “Or just devouring you now that I finally have you.”

“Jihoon,” you sighed, desperation evident in your voice. “Please, just do something.”

“Like what?” he asked, clearly enjoying your lust-filled state of mind.

“Anything.”

He chuckled, and by the sound of it, you knew he didn’t have anything good in mind. He lowered himself some more until his mouth was positioned right in front of your pussy, and, with no warning, licked a long strip from your hole to your clit over your panties, humming at the taste of your arousal.

“Something like this?” he asked afterwards, but was only met with a whine. He kissed the soft flesh of your inner thighs while you squirmed in his hold.

“Don’t tease me, please…” you begged, and your voice was so weak and genuine that he could only give in.

“Whatever you want, baby,” he obliged, the nickname rolling off of his tongue casually. He had no idea what it did to you.

He helped you out of your underwear, finally getting you fully naked just for him. Jihoon was a man of his words, so not a second was lost before he dived right back into you, licking up the arousal spilling out of you before flicking his tongue at your clit. He held your hips tightly in both of his hands so you couldn’t squirm away from him and ate you out like a man starved. You were so sweet and warm against his tongue, and your taste was worlds more intoxicating than any alcohol he’d ever had. He’d do this forever if you let him.

He noticed quickly that attention to your clit was what got you moaning the loudest, so he alternated between circling his tongue around it and gently sucking at it, sometimes releasing it with a pop just for the hell of it. He slipped a finger easily inside of you, your wetness accommodating him immediately. He couldn’t wait to be inside you - his hard cock was throbbing in the confines of his underwear, but his only concern right now was to make you come undone for him.

When he found that deep spot inside of you, the one that had you gasping in pleasure and moaning his name, he slid a second finger in, and just like that, you were done for. You came apart on his fingers and tongue, a complete moaning mess underneath him, and he lapped up the arousal leaking out of you like it was water.

You’d already thought you were at the peak of pleasure when your orgasm came ripping through you like an avalanche, blindsiding you and making you see bright white stars behind your tightly closed eyelids. Your throat felt dry from all the moaning and heaving you’d been doing. You had to take Jihoon’s face between your hands and gently pull him up yourself, otherwise it seemed like he was happy to keep going, but it was starting to overwhelm you.

Jihoon held you in his arms as you came down from your high. You let out the laughter bubbling in your throat as your breathing returned to normal - not because something was funny, but because you had just felt so ridiculously amazing that you couldn’t help but laugh.

“How was it?” Jihoon asked, a lot shyer than you’d expected.

You lifted your head to look at him, a bright smile on your face even though you felt close to exhausted. “I have a hard time believing that was your first time giving head, Hoon.”

He chuckled. “Very first time, I promise you. I must just have some God-given skills.”

“I’m not even gonna fight you on that, because that was amazing,” you conceded, nuzzling yourself closer to him.

“I’m glad I could do that for you,” he said softly, burying his nose at the top of your head and inhaling there. The scent of your hair was oddly comforting for him.

Before you let yourself drift off to sleep, you started raking your fingernails across his chest and abs, smiling proudly to yourself when you heard him breathe shakily or felt his muscles clench under your touch. He wasn’t saying anything, but you could tell he was holding himself back. “I think,” you started, pressing a kiss to the corner of his jaw, “That you deserve something in return.”

“You don’t-”

You knew Jihoon. He didn’t like it when you insisted on paying for coffee because he’d done it the last time, or when you baked him something because he’d stayed up all night with you studying for a test. He liked taking care of you, but you always had to almost force him to let you take care of him. You wanted your relationship to be fifty-fifty - you wanted to give him as much as he gave you. Even if he would let you, it wasn’t fair to just take and take.

So you insisted. Whatever he was about to say, it died on his tongue as soon as you placed your palm on his erection. It felt hot and hard under your hand, and saying you weren’t slightly intimidated would be a lie, but you wanted to do this. If you were able to give Jihoon half the pleasure he’d given you moments prior, you’d be satisfied.

You rubbed your hand slowly up and down over his clothes. “Really, baby,” he managed to say between shaky breaths, “I didn’t do that to get something in return- Fuck,” he whispered as you hooked your fingers underneath the waistband of his sweatpants, pulling it down his legs so he was only left in his underwear. Under the black fabric, his bulge looked huge, and you gulped at the idea of having it inside you.

“This feels good, right, Hoon?” you asked, steadily getting bolder and pressing slightly harder against his bulge as you continued rubbing it.

“It- it does, but-”

You shut him up by pressing your lips to his. He reciprocated it immediately, almost unconsciously, before moaning into the kiss. “So let me do this for you,” you whispered before ridding him of his underwear.

“Okay,” he said, sighing as you rubbed your hands from his knees along his thighs.

The groan he let out as you took him in your hand sent shivers straight down your spine. You could finally put to use all the knowledge Minjeong had passed on to you over the past few months. You let go of Jihoon’s cock to spit in your hand, the moisture helping you glide your loosely closed fist along his shaft with more ease. Your movements themselves were probably very clumsy, but Jihoon didn’t seem to mind - he moaned shamelessly, head fallen back against the pillows and exposed Adam’s apple bobbing up and down.

Seeing him like this and knowing it was all because of you drove you crazy, and soon, you became greedy for any sign of pleasure from him. You wanted to hear all of his moans, sighs, groans, watch his abs clench tightly and feel him grab your hair, which he did as soon as you flicked your tongue across his tip, already leaking with pre-cum. The endless string of curses and moans that flew from his mouth as you circled your tongue and shallowly bobbed your mouth around him filled you with satisfaction.

“Fuck, just like that, Y/N. You’re doing so fucking well, baby. Making me feel so good.” Those words had been the cherry on top.

Jihoon was of a more-than-decent size, and fitting all of him inside of your mouth was probably a task that would take a few tries to achieve - you still did your best to take as much of him as you could. You massaged his balls with one of your hands, using the other to hold the base of his shaft while you bobbed your head up and down. You did this with increasing speed then let him take control over your pace as his fingers threaded themselves in your hair, guiding your head around him. You didn’t even know if he was doing it on purpose or out of reflex, but you definitely did not mind handing him the reins.

“You’re gonna make me- Fuck, Y/N, I’m gonna cum, sweetheart.” You hummed around his shaft, and that seemed to do him in - with a loud groan, he released his load, hot and sticky inside your mouth. Taken aback by the bitter taste, you lifted your head and only swallowed what you had caught. You took him in your hand again, jerking him off to help him ride out the rest of his high.

You watched him, transfixed by his heaving chest, eyes screwed shut, the beads of sweat pearling across his torso, and the red blush that had spread from his face down to his neck. You’d done this. You’d gotten Jihoon in such a state. You let him rest for a bit as you wiped your hands and his body with a tissue and had a sip of water.

You then pressed a kiss to his cheek, taking the time to admire his smiling face. When he opened his eyes and found yours, you suddenly felt so shy that you returned to your usual cuddling position, head resting against his shoulder. He wrapped an arm around your shoulders and pulled you close to him. You were both smelly and sticky, but you couldn’t care less.

“You did so good, baby. You did such a good job,” he whispered, the praise going right to your heart.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. That was amazing.” He sighed contentedly, then lowered his head to look at you. “You feeling sleepy?”

You shook your head no, a shy smile on your lips.

Jihoon smirked slightly. “You wanna keep going?”

You nodded.

He shifted himself so that his back rested against the headboard. “Come here,” he whispers, pulling you to his lap. You both winced in sensitivity at the feeling of your core right against his softening dick, but you didn’t want to pull apart either. If anything, the small stimulation created a pit in your lower stomach for the second time of the night.

You wrapped your arms lazily around his neck while he rested one of his hands on your hips and used the other one to rub your back. “How are you feeling?” he asked, eyes soft and full of affection.

You pressed a long, gentle kiss to his lips. “Good. Really good,” you said, making him chuckle.

“Good. Me too.”

You made out lazily, lips moving languidly against each other, neither of you in a rush to get anywhere. But after some time, you started to feel Jihoon hardening under you, and when you rocked your hips against him, coating his growing erection with arousal, he groaned. His hands traveled down to your ass, grabbing hard at the skin there as he helped you rock back and forth against him. You started out slowly at first, moaning every time your clit brushed against his tip, but it wasn’t long before you sped things up and lost yourself in pleasure once again. Your arms tightened their hold around his neck and, burying your face in his neck, you pressed your chest flush to his and muffled your moans against his skin, in both pleasure and frustration at having him right against you but not inside.

You suddenly lifted your head, and the look on your face made Jihoon instantly stop. “Is everything okay, baby?”

You nodded, but your worry was still evident in the crease of your brows. “Yeah, I just…” You pouted. “I’m scared it’ll hurt, Hoon.”

Jihoon caressed the side of your cheek with his palm, brushing some hair away from your face. “We don’t have to do this today-”

“No!” you exclaimed, taking the both of you aback. “I want to.”

“Okay.”

“I’m just a little bit nervous.”

“Okay. That’s okay, baby.” One of his hands rubbed reassuring circles into your lower back. “We can go as slow as you want, okay? And we can stop whenever you want. Just let me know. Does that sound good?”

You nodded, taking a deep breath. “Yeah, it does.”

Jihoon smiled and pressed his lips to yours. “Are you ready?”

“Yeah,” you whispered.

He helped you lay on your back against the mattress and hovered over you, propping himself up on one forearm. As he kissed you, he caressed one of your thighs, hand inching closer and closer to your core and making your blood rush with anticipation. Then he finally pressed two fingers to your folds, gathering up some of your arousal

before sliding his digits inside of you. As you gasped out in pleasure, his lips trailed away from your lips and found a new home in your neck.

He scissored his fingers inside of you, stretching you out and getting you ready for him as he murmured words of “you’re doing so well” and “I’ll make you feel good,” as if he wasn’t already. When you seemed relaxed enough, he slid his fingers out of you, smiling at you mischievously while he sucked your arousal off of them. Then, taking his dick by the base, he rubbed his tip along your folds, making your body twitch and loud moans escape your mouth. He pressed a final kiss to your cheek and buried his face in your neck, trying to ground himself too as he slowly started pushing himself inside of you.

His dick was so much bigger than his fingers, and you gripped his hair tightly as you got used to the new sensation. Tears prickled in your eyes, the unexpected stretch making you frown in discomfort. It was a completely different pain to what you were used to, but the overwhelming pleasure mixed with it made it almost welcome.

Jihoon was using all of his self-control to not pound you into tomorrow - your tight pussy was sucking him right in, and it was like his whole body sighed of relief when he bottomed out. He couldn’t believe he was inside you, feeling your walls clench around him and hearing your soft grunts as you got used to him. It was a scene right out of his wet dreams.

“You okay?” he asked, voice muffled against your skin. His voice sounded strained and heavy.

“I’m okay, Hoonie. I just need a minute.”

For that minute, as you breathed shallowly and relaxed around him, Jihoon pressed wet kisses wherever his lips could reach and twirled one of your nipples between two fingers to take your mind off of your pain.

“Take your time. I know I’m big, baby,” he said. You could hear the smirk in his voice.

“No, you’re just right, Hoon. It feels nice now.”

Objectively, Jihoon knew that this was a good thing, and that you had meant in a good way - better for him to fit right inside rather than cause you pain, but a part of his ego had still been hurt by your refutal of his claim. But then you told him he could move, and he forgot all about it.

It took him another superhuman kind of effort to go slow, slowly rolling his hips against yours with a self-control he didn’t know he had. He scanned your face for any signs of discomfort, kissing your small frown in the hope it might go away. He watched as your jaw relaxed and the soft hums escaping your throat turned into moans, as the crease in your eyebrows softened and turned into one of pleasure rather than pain. He allowed his movements to speed up, noting with satisfaction the increasing volume of the noises you were making and the way your fingernails dug into the skin of his shoulders.

He lifted himself on his palms and hooked one of your legs around his hips, the new, deeper angle having you seeing stars. He asked if you were okay again, and when you not only nodded yes, but asked him to go faster, Jihoon had to admit he got a little bit carried away, both in his actions and his words.

Jihoon had a big mouth - you knew it, everyone knew it. What you didn’t know was that he would keep that big mouth even balls-deep inside you.

Maintaining a fast pace, he lowered himself so that his lips tickled your ear as he spoke. “You’re doing so well, baby. Taking my cock like the good girl you are. Isn’t that right? You’re my good girl,” he grunted, punctuating his words with harsh rolls of his hips into yours. You couldn’t even get yourself to answer, that’s how far gone you were, his words going into your one ear and coming out the other. All you could think about was how good it all felt, from his tip repeatedly hitting that delicious spot inside of you to the feeling of his warm, sticky skin against yours. The room smelled of sweat and arousal and was filled with all sorts of noises - your heavy breathing, your moans, your grunts, the wet sound of Jihoon’s dick inside of you.

“Can’t even say anything, can you? Am I making you feel that good, baby?”

You moaned, thinking that should be enough of a yes for him, but you should’ve known better.

“I think you should answer me when I ask you a question, Y/N,” he commanded, slowing his pace down to get you to listen to him.

“Y-yes, it feels so good, Hoon,” you replied, out-of-breath.

“Attagirl,” he whispered, smiling as he bit the lobe of your ear.

You hadn’t even realized you were crying until Jihoon halted in his motions, feeling one of your hot, wet tears on his palm. He was quick to wipe it away, searching for any pain in your features, but you only whined, asking him why he’d stopped.

“Why are you crying, baby? Did I hurt you? Are you okay?” he asked frantically. The worry in his voice only amplified your already overflowing love for him.

“No, you didn’t do anything wrong, I just… God, this is so embarrassing,” you all but sobbed against his skin, realizing that the pleasure had been so overwhelming, tears had started flowing from your eyes.

“No, it’s not.”

You screwed your eyes shut for a second before meeting his gaze again. “I just- it feels so good, Hoon.”

A pause passed as he took a deep breath. “Is that it?”

“It is, I promise. Please, just… let’s keep going, Hoonie. I was so close,” you whined, and Jihoon couldn’t help but chuckle at your desperation. How was it that he still found you so adorable even in such a situation?

“Okay, baby. I’m relieved.” He wiped more of your tears that had fallen, but as soon as he moved inside of you again, taking a minute to return to his previous harsh pace, your tears resumed streaking down your cheeks. Jihoon kissed them, savoring their salty taste on his tongue.

It didn’t take long for the knot in your stomach to become tight again, and with every deep thrust, you felt yourself getting closer and closer to the edge.

“You look so pretty like this, sweetheart. All fucked out for me.”

“Mm. I’m so close, Hoon, gonna- fuck, gonna-”

“You’re gonna cum for me, baby? Gonna cum and make a mess all over my cock?”

“Yes, Hoon, fuck-”

You gasped out loud as his hand found your clit again, using his thumb to rub quick circles into the sensitive bundle of nerves. “Cum for me, sweetheart, show me how good it feels.”

That did it for you. Your second orgasm of the night washed over you, making you release your loudest moan yet. You held on to Jihoon like you might fall apart if you didn’t.

The quick clenching and unclenching of your walls around Jihoon’s dick as he fucked you throughout your high drove him crazy and, soon enough, he came undone himself, hot, white ropes of his cum filling you up. The squelch as he fucked his cum into you, the both of you moaning in overstimulation, was nothing short of pornographic.

Jihoon all but collapsed on top of you, humming as you traced your fingernails up and down his back. You took a few minutes to collect yourselves, and you thought he might have fallen asleep, soft dick still inside you, when he lifted himself up with a sigh and slid out of you. You winced at the loss of his warmth. He pressed a kiss to your forehead and said he’d be back in a sec.

When he entered your room again, he was carrying a towel, a tall glass of water, and leftovers from your takeout earlier. He cleaned you off and asked you how you felt, then you chatted as you ate your food. You could pass out at any moment, but it was nice, talking a little bit after the moment you shared instead of falling asleep straight away.

He almost choked on his water when you asked him where he’d learned to talk so dirty - now that he was out of the moment, his cheeks reddened at the thought of everything he’d told you. “It just comes naturally,” he’d said shyly.

“Do you want anything?” he asked when you were done eating.

You kissed him, smiling against his lips. “I’m all good, Hoon. You?”

He mirrored your smile. “All good, too.”

“I just wanna cuddle and sleep now. I’m spent.”

“Sounds perfect to me,” he whispered. He laid down on his back and you followed, letting him wrap an arm around your shoulder while you rested your head on his chest. He drew you close to him and pulled the blankets over your intertwined bodies. “Is it creepy if I just stare at you for a little bit?”

“Kinda, yeah.”

“But you’re so pretty,” Jihoon pouted.

“I’ll just sleep and pretend I don’t know anything about it.”

“Okay, just don’t panic if you feel a strange but very attractive presence looming over you.”

You snorted. “Noted. Night, Hoon.” You pressed a kiss to his neck and he hummed.

“Night, pretty. Sleep tight.”

When you woke up a few hours later, your room was bathing in the bright yellow glow of the early morning. You and Jihoon had shifted positions in the night and you’d ended up curled up on your side, back to him while he slept on his back, arms sprayed out next to him. It was the feeling of him shifting closer to you and wrapping an arm around your waist that had awoken you, a sudden warmth engulfing your body that made you feel like you might still be dreaming.

But no, it was all very real. From the man behind you, to the events of the previous night, to the dull but not unpleasant ache you felt between your legs. You sighed contentedly, taking his hand in yours and wrapping it tighter around yourself.

Curious to see if he was awake, you turned around after a few minutes and faced him. He seemed pretty passed out until you pressed a soft kiss to his nose, then another to his cheek. His eyebrows creased for a second and his foot moved against yours. He didn’t open his eyes, but he pursed his lips for a kiss. He wasn’t content with just a peck, however, and you found yourself making out with him first thing in the morning, lips full of sleep and cotton-soft like your pillows.

“You have no idea how much I’ve dreamed of this,” he says after a while, keeping his eyes closed, morning voice sending chills down your spine. “Waking up next to you.”

“You have?”

“I have. I don’t know if I should freak out over this and have a party or just be chill about it,” he said, smiling.

“We can have a party.”

“Really?” Jihoon asked, opening his eyes wide, excited like a kid who was just told they were going to Disneyland.

“Sure,” you giggled. “We can invite all of our friends and celebrate our one-week anniversary or something. Minjeong will probably want to plan it.”

He sighed happily. “I’m holding you to that. We’re celebrating.”

After lazing around in bed for a couple hours, going back and forth between chatting while cuddling and making out, your growling stomachs forced you out of your room and into the kitchen.

You and Jihoon noticed it at the same time. It was hard to miss, after all - a bright pink sheet of A4 paper with hearts and little Cupids everywhere right in the middle of the surface of your fridge, but more importantly, your name and Jihoon’s in big bubble letters with 99% in the middle. You wanted to rip it from the surface of your fridge, but the damage had been done - index pointed at the paper, Jihoon turned to you with an incredulous look on his face. You scratched the back of your neck and looked around the kitchen for a way to escape.

“Y/N, what’s this?” Jihoon asked, amusement laced in his voice.

You tried to find some sort of excuse, but to no avail. “This is just, um- you know, just a, uh, just-” The sound of Jihoon’s cackles interrupted you. You looked at him, unimpressed. “Don’t laugh at me. I was stressing out, okay? I needed something to reassure me.”

Jihoon was grinning wide as he pulled you into a hug, one arm around your waist and one hand on the back of your head. “You’re so adorable,” he mused, pressing a kiss to your hair. You wrapped your arms around his middle and nuzzled your nose against his neck, the comforting scent of his skin making you forget about your embarrassment.

He leaned away slightly and took the paper off of the fridge, smiling down at it. “As cute as this is, you don’t need it. I’ll show you everyday that I’m the perfect man for you, okay?”

You mirrored his smile. “Okay.” Even when your lips found each other, you couldn’t stop smiling, giggles escaping from your lips into his. You only laughed harder when he started pressing small kisses all over your face, making sure to not miss a single spot. He pressed a final one to your forehead before resting his against it, both of you closing your eyes and relishing in each other’s presence.

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

permanent taglist: @zreamy @sunghoonmybeloved @lalalalawon @sd211 @w3bqrl @raikea10 @wntrnghts @moonlighthoon @4imhry @rikisly @loves0ft @iamliacamila @theboingsuckerasseater9000 @chaechae-23 @baekhyuns-lipchain @hyuckslvr (ask to be removed/added!)

#yg treasure #treasure jihoon #treasure smut #park jihoon smut #treasure x reader #park jihoon x reader #treasure fluff #park jihoon fluff #treasure scenarios #park jihoon scenarios

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mingsolo · 4 months

Text

PAUSE + PLAY

wonwoo x reader (f) / g: meet cute, 90s au, fluff, strangers to lovers / wc: 4k / warnings: cursing, some nipple action, mingyu being a sl*t, / r: nc17

written for Now, That's 90s! collab, hosted by @beomcoups and I! ngI struggled not because I couldn't write this one, but because life is kicking my ass and I couldn't find the time to really sit and think through it... anyways it turned out pretty cute please read if you can <3

A drop of sweat rolled down from your forehead, you blew some air to your face but of course it was hot and it made you dizzy. “Is this thing even on?.” you shouted from the other corner of the shop, to your co-worker, Mingyu.

You stood under the AC trying to feel if there was actually cool air coming from it but you couldn’t feel but a weak wave of hot air over you.

“Yeah, that thing is better off.” Mingyu shouted back, where he was lining up tapes in the kids section. “By the way, could you help me check the return box? There’s some tapes missing here, they should be there.”

You waved out, going to the returns box at the entrance of the store. A few tapes were in, three Toy Story 2, one Tarzan and a copy of 10 Things I Hate About You along with two Armageddon at the bottom. You placed the movies on the counter as Mingyu was approaching you. “We need to rewind them first, all of them!” You say inspecting the tapes, “Geez, why do they never do it?.”

Mingyu laughs and shakes his head. “The sign even says “Please” on it, right?.” He taps the hardcover of the vhs box, where “Please rewind before returning” signs reads on it.

“And it's so hot to be in the rewind room!.” you nag once more, taking the tapes with both arms and dragging your feet to the back of the store and rewind the tapes before someone comes looking for them. Mingyu returns to his previous spot on the kids section, not without laughing at you first.

Despite the whole minute that it took you to get there, you are now placing the tapes into the machine, leaving the door open so some of the air could get in, the small and dark room feels suffocating just by being two steps inside it. In the speakers of the store, the faint sound of Genie In a Bottle plays on and you start humming, partly because you have the song stuck in your head thanks to Mingyu playing the cd over and over when he is on shift, and because it somehow helps the task be a little less tedious.

While on it, you hear the bells ringing meaning a customer has come to the store. You peek out to see a familiar tall figure enter, waving his way in walking directly towards the back where Mingyu was at the kids section.

“Hey!” you heard the guy saying until he disappeared from your line of sight. You tried to peek out more but it won’t be possible without you stepping out of the room, so you hurried up the process to get another glance before he’s out.

In the month you have been working there, you have seen this guy come in at least once a week. You were sure he was Mingyu’s friend as he always walked directly towards him or looked for him especially after picking up some tapes. The past times he had come with you on shift without Mingyu, you had the bad luck of always doing something like rewinding tapes or in the bathroom, never getting the chance to even greet him when he entered the store.

One thing for sure, hee was cute as hell. Cat like eyes and thin defined lips, huge black frames on his face, making it look smaller. And you noticed only by getting little glimpses of him, as he was always in a rush or something, never staying more than five minutes. You thought of asking Mingyu who he was but decided not to as you were still new in the store and even if you liked and had fun working with him, Mingyu has proven to be the teasing type, and he wouldn’t let you work in peace if you dare asking him about this other guy.

Just as you were cursing at Armageddon for rewinding so slowly, you heard them saying goodbyes and the chiming doorbell announcing he was out.

With a sigh you rolled your eyes and finished your task without hurry, hoping the cat boy would come back soon and you were luckily enough to be on the counter to greet him.

Today was a Monday, and the week promised to be a quiet one. Not many new releases came to the store yet so customers wandered a little bit before getting out, or just asking when would you stock Sleepy Hollow or why you had so few copies of The Sixth Sense. You tried your best to give every customer a smile at the beginning but after a month of getting the same questions over and over, you just shrugged and advised people to come back later, and maybe the previous customer had brought it back by then.

Mingyu was way better with customers, both girls and guys. ‘I’ll get it ready and rewinded this afternoon for you’ he said with a wink to a middle aged lady, who shamelessly smiled and flirted with him while her kid smudged chocolate from the bar he was eating on a copy of Inspector Gadget.

“Great, now I have to clean that.” you glared at Mingyu as he saved the piece of paper with the woman’s number on his back pocket once she and the chocolate kid were gone. “I swear to God I’ve seen her come in with her husband.” you arch your eyebrows at him.

“That doesn’t seem like a me problem.” He shot gun fingers at you and got back to his task on the counter, where a few other ladies waited for him.

You chuckled and started spraying windex on Mathew Broderick’s face covered in chocolate, laughing at how Mingyu flirted shamelessly with every single one of them, all at once, but they didn’t seem to mind.

Once good ol’ Mathew’s face was clean you left the tape back on the shelf, when you heard the bell ring. “Y/n, can you help?” Mingyu hurried to tell you, he was now surrounded by the women as he showed them a copy of Between Your Legs animatedly. “This one is from our exclusive foreign section, so exotic! And the plot is fascinating…” He looked at the ceiling and the ladies followed.

You shook your head and got up from where you were squatting, seeing the tall figure of cat-boy coming through the door. He looked at the commotion on the counter and figured out Mingyu was busy at the moment. He hesitated for a second before turning back ready to head out when you sprinted towards him, shouting “HI!! WELCOME IN!” maybe a little too enthusiastically.

“H-hi,” he said back, a little startled by your shouting. Mingyu also looked up to you for a moment, but he was quickly back to answering curious questions from his little fan club. “Uhm, I’ll be back later when-”

“No! Please, I know Mingyu usually helps you out but please tell me what can I do for you?,” you smiled with pressed lips and your voice two tones higher than how you usually speak, but you couldn’t help it. Seeing him in front of you confirmed your suspicions, he was stupidly handsome, freakingly hot even behind those thick square glasses. His hoodie smells like coffee and the cap he was wearing backwards made the earring on his left ear seem more dangly.

“I really would prefer to wait for Mingyu…”

“Nonsense!” you guided him towards a free counter next to where Mingyu and his harem were discussing Between Your Legs, quickly putting some space between you two before you would get inappropriately close and start sniffing his sweater, your eyes shining brightly as you spotted cat hairs on them.

God he is so hot for a nerd!!!

“So, what can I do for you today, I’m Y/n by the way,” you smiled again and you could swear you creeped him out by the way he started sweating. It was hot as hell inside but still, his ears turned red and the tapes he was carrying under his arm were starting to slip from his grip. He quickly put them in the pocket of his hoodie, smiling awkwardly and glancing at Mingyu behind his frames.

You glanced at Mingyu too, who began chuckling, losing for a moment his track on the plot of the movie he was explaining.

“Are you going to return those?” you extended your hand but he stood still, tapes still packed into his hoodie. “No?,” you asked again. He opened his mouth briefly but smacked his lips loudly looking at the ceiling.

He looked at Mingyu and his expression changed from mortified to annoyed. He bit his cheek and took a deep breath before taking out the tapes and laying them one on top of another before you.

Night of the Giving Head, A Beautiful Behind, Yank my Doodle! It's a Dandy!, and Throbin Hood laid on the counter before you.

There was a few seconds of silence, only broken up by Mingyu’s suppressed wheeze. You cleared your throat lightly, taking the tapes and checking if they were rewinded. “Oh a rewinder, that’s unusual!” you chuckled dryly not really knowing how to break the wall of ice that suddenly appeared in front of you.

“I didn’t watch them,” He cleared his throat, avoiding eye contact. “That’s why they are- anyway.” He sighed and stopped, releasing it seemed like he was making up excuses for not one in particular.

“You don’t have to explain,” You tried to sound friendly and not make a big deal, but you had so many questions and this selection was the last thing you expected to see him with. “We are a judging free video store,” the words coming out mechanically as you remembered the training video Mingyu played for you once on your first day.

“Yeah…It’s not… Can we please get this over with quickly?,” He returned to his mortified expression and you nodded quickly annotating the returns on the logbook. “Thanks,” He smiled awkwardly at you before tapping the counter once, glancing quickly at Mingyu one more time before sprinting out.

“He’s going to murder me, but oh god, it was worth it!”

Mingyu was now smiling ear to ear, waving goodbye to the last girl that visited the shop for the day, her phone number written on his palm. “I got no more sticky notes left,” he said before sticking his hand out to her.

“Yeah that was… I didn’t even know we had these.” you were sweeping the floors as the store was about to close, keeping yourself busy for the rest of the day still thinking about the Night of The Giving Head cover inside your mind. “Wait, he’s your friend, does he only watch porn?.”

Mingyu laughed loudly, helping you out by taking the trash bags out of the bins and emptied them in one big plastic bag. “Maybe, why do you ask?” he arched his eyebrows at you.

“No reason, it was just- he doesn’t look like the porn addict type.”

Mingyu laughed louder. “Wait till I tell him you think he’s a porn addict!” He collected the dust you were sweeping onto the plastic bag, making a knot and throwing it on his shoulders.

“Wait! Why would you tell him that?!”

“No reason…” he smirked, walking outside to take out the trash.

The next week the store got busier than usual, so Mingyu and you barely got to chat with each other about cat-boy or anything really. He had also switched shifts to train a new employee, a younger guy, probably a highschooler, who he spent most of the time in the mornings, leaving you alone to take care of the closing shift.

Saturday came quickly, and you were alone in the shop. Lights were almost all out, and you were finishing stocking some new tapes that came that afternoon, the last task before officially closing.

Somehow the humid air was insufferable even by night time, so you were sweating bullets over the thick fabric of your uniform shirt. You couldn’t believe they made you wear this in this hot weather, but alas, you were transpiring and melting under it.

As you finished putting the tapes on their respective shelfs, you walked towards the bathroom where you had a spare shirt, not before turning the volume of the radio a little, you played music a lot in the shop and the customers seemed to like your taste more like Mingyu’s.

Once there, humming to Bills Bills Bills, you were looking for your spare shirt when you noticed you it wasn’t there. “What the-?” you cursed under your breath, sure you had one hanging on the stall reserved for staff. One glance at the sweaty uniform shirt you just took off and you knew you won’t be wearing that again. “Come on, I already put roll-on….” you whined. Then you remembered there were a couple of uniform shirts in the lockers, maybe too big for you but that would do for today and you will return them tomorrow.

And so you were signing,

Can you pay my telephone bills?,

Can you pay my automo’ bills?

If you did, maybe we could chill….

When suddenly the tall figure of cat-boy appeared in front of you right by the counter. He stared. And you stared back. And his eyes stayed on your face for a a few seconds, but they quickly drifted a little down, on your lace see through bra, nonetheless.

“What the fuck?!” you shouted, sprinting towards the locker room.

“Im sorry! I knocked, and the lights were on…. I thought…” you could hear him speak but there was a high ringing pitch in your ears that made his voice fade away as you took one of the spare uniform shirts and slipped in over your head. “The fuck you needed to wear a see through one today, huh?!” you covered your face with both palms.

“I’m sorry… I better go…”

You heard footsteps and shouted “No!” back but when you were out you could only see his back walk out the door.

You blew raspberries, feeling insufferably hot under the hot fabric of the oversized uniform shirt, that covered you like a circus carp. “Too much for our second encounter, cat-boy.”

The next day you got to the store a little early, trying to catch Mingyu before he left for the day, and to your surprise, he was waiting for you.

“A nipple piercing!”

“Good afternoon to you too!” you sighed, walking towards the locker room with Mingyu’s tail wagging at your ankles. “And how could he notice that?! It was dark!” you threw your backpack at your locker, huffing and puffing, ignoring Mingyu’s curious eyes.

“I guess he was really paying attention,” he teased. You shot him a glare and he raised his arms signaling peace. “Hey, don’t be mad that he told me, I’m his best friend and well, he actually came looking for you, how could he know you liked walking around the store naked when you were on shift alone?”

“I-wasn’t-naked.” you slapped the locker room shut. “Wait… he came looking out for me?”

Mingyu wiggled his eyebrows in response.

“Tell me everything, or else.”

“He likes you, duh.” Mingyu moved toward his locker, pretending to roam for something but you knew there wasn’t anything there. “He has had his eyes on you, since the first day he saw you working here.”

“But why hasn't he talked to me? He always comes in and it’s gone in a second.”

Mingyu clicked his tongue. “He had a bad break up two years ago, and honestly he’s pretty shy, maybe that’s why we are such good friends, we balance each other…” you crossed your arms signaling he was deviating from the topic. “... So he wasn’t sure how to approach you, he has been coming here asking me to be a wingman but I refused, I was trying to encourage him so I told him you were going to be alone yesterday.”

You sighed, walking out the locker room with Mingyu behind you, ready to get off.

“Want me to tell W-”

“NOO!” you shouted, making the couple of customers in the store turn their heads at you. “Don’t tell me his name, I want him to tell me when he finally comes and talks to me.”

Mingyu chuckled and nodded, messing your head a little in sign of encouragement. “Get him, tiger. I’ll pass the note out.” He winked and you shrugged as he walked out the store.

Needless to say, all the way to the evening your stomach was swirling inside you. You jumped a little every time the doorbell chimed, and it sank back to your stomach everytime cat-boy wasn’t the one entering.

It was almost seven and you were waving goodbye to the last customer of the day before you changed the sign from open to closed, when you heard the bell one more time.

The couple of teens walked past cat-boy as he entered the store and they walked out. You could hear loud stomps inside your chest, and you were pretty sure they were so loud he could hear them too. You looked at the mirror wall to your left, and despite being a few feet away you could spot the newest shades of red adorning your face.

As he walked closer, you smiled shyly, spotting the same color on him too.

“Hey,” he waved so tiny that you felt like your body was becoming butter, cause despite standing up, you felt melted, all over the floor.

“Hi,” you replied back, not knowing what to say really. Dissociating a little from the awkwardness you focused on him. All of him. His fluffy hair, not hiding under a cap this time. The black thick frames. He was wearing a black sweater, a turtle neck one. Few noticeable white hairs on it. You remembered marshmallow, your cat, and smiled without noticing.

“Y/n,?” you heard his voice crack, noticing you smiling.

“Sorry! Seeing the cat hair on your sweater reminded me of mine.”

“You have cats?” his eyes became a little bigger. “Me too!”

“Yeah.. I can tell by the cat hair,” you chuckled.

“Right…” he scratched the back of his head. “Well I have a couple.. A few.”

“I love cats! I only have marshmallow because my landlord doesn’t let me have more, but one day I will!” you were glad you mentioned the cat hair cause this gave you a shot to talk more comfortably. “By the way, did Mingyu tell you my name?”

“I asked him, the first day I saw you here working.”

“Not fair, I didn't let him tell me yours.”

“Huh?” He arched his eyebrows, puzzled.

“He told me you came looking for me yesterday… Sorry you find me like that, I swear I don’t usually walk around naked when I’m alone here…”

He laughed. “Mingyu told me you probably did.”

You scoffed. “He’s the whore not I.”

“Can’t defend him from that,” He lowered his head a little, “Sorry I told him about your… well I was frantic after seeing you like that and ran straight to his dorm, I was too shocked I guess, I wasn’t trying to be a creep.”

“And what about the pornos? Night of the Giving Head, seriously?”

“That was Mingyu! He dropped them at my dorm the night before telling me I should distract myself from being a coward and not talk to you…” He speaked fast and you were trying to follow up. “I swear I didn’t watched them, I tried, but they were too tacky”

“There’s tasteful porn?” you laughed.

“There should be… somewhere” he laughed back.

“Bet the bastard wanted you to return them so I could catch you myself!”

“He a hundred percent did.”

There was a moment of silence after the laugh, and you felt like staring at the floor because looking at him was becoming addicting too quickly.

“Want me to help you close? I want you to walk out with me for a while, maybe get some coffee?” He suddenly speaks, and you snap out of the mental image of you two sitting on your couch, a few cats around.

“Uh- well I just need to take out the trash and I’m ready, I- would love that,” He smiles from ear to ear and stands straight, making you notice he’s like, really really tall.

“I’ll help you with that, be ready when I come back!” He sprinted towards the entrance where the two plastic bags laid one beside the other and took them out. You run towards the bathroom as soon as he’s out, changing your ugly uniform shirt into your spare one, feeling relieved when you notice is there this time. After putting roll on, combing your hair a little and putting some perfume you walk out, finding him waiting for you near the entrance.

He asks if he can wash his hands and once that’s done you close up, and you start walking beside him to nowhere in particular.

You suggest walking to your recent favorite spot, a part cafe, part flower shop near your apartment. Walking there you talk about your studies, the tedious but fun times at the video store, his job at the library (he was such a nerd!), his and your cat, about everything and nothing in particular, and time just flew by so quickly.

“This is so nice, I didn’t even notice the hour!” you say checking the casio watch on your wrist. And he does the same.

“Let me walk you home, I would feel bad by letting you take a cab at this hour.”

“It’s not far away…” you object but he insists. “Fine, but just by the door, what if you are indeed a creep or something!” He pouts and gives you the stink eye. You laughed, delighted how quickly you became comfortable with each other.

Once at your door you ask him to give you his palm. “I learned this trick from our dear Gyu,” you say, taking out a sharpie pen from your backpack and writing your number on his palm. “There, call me as soon as you get home, I’m not done talking to you.”

You thanked him for the coffee and sprinted towards your complex door without letting him say anything else.

A quarter to eleven, your phone starts ringing.

Grabbing the cordless phone from its base and throwing yourself over your bed you answer. “Hello?,”

“I was about to tell you my name and ask you on a proper date,” you heard his shaky voice from the other line. He must have literally run or sprinted towards his own apartment. “But you ran away.”

You smiled, twirling your hair, eyes closed remembering every moment since you closed the video store a few hours ago.

“Y/n?,”

“Not yet cat-boy, I want you to tell me only after you first kiss me.” A few moments of silence before he speaks again, you can’t see him but you know he’s smiling too.

“Deal, then I won’t be cat-boy much longer.”

@mingsolo please don't repost/translate to any sites.

#wonwoo fanfic #kvanity #svt x reader #wonwoo x reader #seventeen fluff #seventeen x reader #wonwoo fluff #now that's 90s collab #fic tag #my fic #oneshot #fluff

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colddelusionsheep · 1 year

Note

Loved the scientist and king ideas, can you expand more on those?

So I am going to go with the king idea simply because I had a really good dream about it.

Okay, so this is actually going to take a different direction then what I originally had. Let's say you are a young servant in the castle with no ties that connect you to royalty, at least that is what you believe. Maybe your peasant mother had a relation with the king, making you the illegitimate child of the king.

Your mother, recognizing just how possessive the king was, went into hiding once she found out she was pregnant with you. The King never found out about you, until you had to serve him tea

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The King never treat the staff very kindly, and if any of them would make a wrong step they would pay heavily for it. You found the risk worth it however. The amount of pay was by no means good, but it was steady and included housing and food. From what you had before it was a huge improvement. Your mother died when you were very young. So you never had a very stable life.

You were tasked with bringing the King his evening tea. This wasn't normally your task, but the servant who normally did this was caught with a bad cold. You were shaking with fear. You had never seen the king in person.

All his portraits had always had a darkness to them. None of them had even a hint of a smile. This moment could define wether you kept your job and your head. You heard a rumor that a servant accidently looked the king in the eye and for that got his eyes gauged out.

As you knocked on the heavy wooden door. You tried you best to not shake. If just looking him in the eye carried such a punishment you didn't want to know what spilling hot tea on him would entail.

You entered into his office once he gave his acknowledgement, making sure to keep your head down. making sure to set the tea cart at your side. You started to prepare his tea. You made sure to prepare it exactly as you were told. No suger and no cream.

Almost done you told yourself. All you had to do now was serve him the cup and leave. Then you never would have to do anything like this again. As you bowed and started to push the cart out the door. You failed to notice the tilt of the King's head and the look of confused recognition that crossed his eye.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Is this the start of something great? I believe so. Also, I am really bad at names so.....yea. Get ready for some super basic names. Also, I just wanted to say thank you. I have been getting so much love for my writing. I am so happy that so many people enjoy my ideas.

#yandere writing #yandere #yandere x reader #yandere idea #yandere story #yandere concept #yandere male #yandere father #yandere platonic #yandere family #yandere king #yandere evil king #yandere fantasy

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sk2lton · 2 years

Text

PIERCER IN TRAINING﹙☆﹚— TWST

you want to pierce your ears, jade offers to do it for you.

— warnings: mention of needles, ears being pierced of course, semi proofread

— characters: jade (ft. azul)

when you first complained about wanting to pierce your ears, jade offered to do it for you. immediately, you shot him down. it would be stupid of you to accept an offer from jade leech of all people to pierce your ears. the possibilities were endless. he could pierce the wrong part of your ear. he could end up making too big of a hole. he could make too small of a hole. you knew none of the staff would be impressed to see you walk in to the infirmary with your ears in dire need of first aid. however, you seemed to underestimate jade’s persuasive skills. that was your biggest and most costly oversight.

since, before you knew it, you were sitting in front of jade, after hours at monstro lounge, as he was readying himself to pierce your ears. “are you sure you can do this?” you nervously asked as you watched him slip a pair of latex gloves on. at least he acted like a professional piercer.

“i have told you, i’ve done this many times. you have nothing to worry about,” jade spoke as he inspected some of the trinkets that were there to pierce your ears.

“define many,” you asked.

“myself, of course. floyd as well,” he seemed rather proud by this. however what he claimed to be many, wasn’t many. that was certainly not reassuring to hear. “now, can you please stop perspiring. what if your sweat makes my hand slip and pierce the wrong place?”

you froze, wiping the sweat off your face and away from your hairline. “you know what, maybe i’ll just wait to get a professional-”

“i am one. would you like to see my certificate?” jade asked, setting down the needle.

you paused for a moment. sometimes, it was hard to tell if jade was serious or not. squinting at him, you spoke, “do you really have one?”

“no, i just thought that it would make you feel better if you thought i did,” jade said before he took a marker and begun trying to figure out where to pierce each ear. “i will not do anything bad, you have my word.” now that was more reassuring.

“what if something goes wrong?” you mumbled, trying to stay still while he marks with two little dots where he is going to pierce your ears.

“that’s simple, it won’t,” he was rather confident in his piercing abilities. although you haven’t seen him in action, it was certainly comforting to hear his confidence remain fixed, despite the fact that you’ve continuously questioned his abilities ever since he offered to do this for you. although, an offer makes it sound like it was free. even though jade didn’t name a price, you knew it came with one that you would find out soon enough.

“i don’t think i’ve ever seen you this concentrated,” you tried hard not to make eye contact as he was very close to your face, still attempting to make the dots symmetrical. jade was completely and utterly fixated on the task at hand. his eyebrows were slightly furrowed and he seemed to bite the inside of his cheek in frustration. every now and then he would gently grasp your chin, moving your head around to make sure he’s gotten it right. that made it difficult to avoid eye contact and whenever your eyes would accidentally lock onto his, jade would let out a low chuckle. that chuckle sent heat straight to your face, but you tried to ignore it.

once he was satisfied, he breathed out a long sigh. “this is your last chance to back out. are you going to take it or should i get started?” he picked up the needle, raising a brow at you expectantly.

“just get over with it,” you told him. in response, he nodded. when positioning himself at a different angle, one that would aid him in getting the needle through your right ear, he leaned in close.

“if it’s too much pain, it doesn’t matter to me what you do. just don’t move,” jade advised you. you hummed in response to let him know that you had heard him.

“wait, are you going to do a countdown or something- ow!” you yelped as you felt the needle poke through your earlobe. although it didn’t hurt as much as you thought it would, jade had caught you off guard which caused you to let out that yelp.

“oh no,” jade said.

“jade? what do you mean, oh no?” you tried to glance at him through your peripheral vision but failed. what did he mean by oh no? had something went wrong? you felt another pinch at your right ear and winced in response. “jade?!” you heard him suck in a breath. “why oh no?!”

“i’m sincerely sorry.”

“what happened? what do you mean??” you felt yourself become increasingly more nervous, enraged, and confused. what had happened to make jade respond like this? did he truly mess up that badly?

“it’s best you don’t know. now, onto your left ear,” jade grinned.

“no way am i going to let that happen! what’d you do to my first ear?”

“what are you guys doing here still?” azul walked out of his office, clearly annoyed by the ruckus being caused outside of it. “jade, why do you have a needle in your hand. and you, why are you screaming?”

“azul!” you ran to him. “does my ear look okay?” you turned to show him your right ear. azul shot jade a look of bewilderment.

“yes, it looks fine,” he spoke. “did you always have an earring on this side?”

turning around, you glared at jade who seemed to be chuckling to himself. of course, he had been joking about ruining your piercing. that should’ve seemed obvious from the start. after jade explained what you two were doing, azul looked at you both with amusement before retreating back into his office. however, before that, he had forced you two to promise not to do anything reckless and if you ended up needing to go to the infirmary, you had to say the injury was sustained in anywhere but the monstro lounge. once agreeing, you sat back down in front of jade, burning holes into him from your harsh scowl.

“remind me to never let you give me a piercing again,” you mumbled, arms crossed as jade moved around to your left side.

“who else will i practice on?” he frowned.

“azul, i’m sure he’d appreciate it!” you sarcastically stated.

“if i ever came near azul with a needle, no matter what the reason was, he would make me pay,” jade said.

“next time, i’ll take a page from azul’s book then,” you grumbled. “and, this time can you countdown? it’s really annoying-” then once again, while you were unready, jade stuck the needle through your left ear. it hurt much less than the first time. “if you were an actual piercer, i would give you a one-star rating for this!” jade only smiled in response. next, you felt another pinch which you assumed was the earring going through the new hole.

once finished, jade moved to face you directly. he nodded, seeming proud of the job he had done before he pulled out his phone, passing it to you so you could see yourself using the camera. to your surprise, your earrings were very evenly placed at the same level, in the middle of your earlobe. there was no blood and although your ears were red, that would fade over time. you smiled at the topaz and silver earrings which jade had insisted on.

“thank you, jade. they look really nice!” you exclaimed.

“you’re welcome. now, for my pay, i’ll be calling upon you for a favour within the next few days, so don’t forget,” he spoke, pulling off his latex gloves. he begun to clean up his makeshift piercing station.

the fact that you had to pay jade back with a favour was probably more terrifying than the fact that jade was the person who pierced your ears. if you were to tell any of your friends this, surely they’ll boo at you for making such a stupid decision but in your defense, he was excellent at piercing ears.

#twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland headcanon #twst hcs #twst headcanons #twisted wonderland x reader #twst azul #🧩ﾟ. — files ?!#twst jade #jade leech x reader #jade leech #jade leech headcanons #twst fic #twst fanfic #disney twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland fic

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zoeykallus · 5 months

Note

Hello Zoey,

How are you??? We miss your stories so much!!!!!!

You write a lot about the Batch and I imagine that you must have watched both seasons and that the personality of the characters is no longer a secret to you. I am French and on a French forum that I read, a person thinks that Crosshair is a psychopath in view of his behavior in the series. I don't agree at all but he made a lot of arguments. What do you think about it? If you had to define Crosshair's personality what would you say?

Thank you so much !!!!!!

Aloha!

SPOILER!!! For those who haven't seen both BAD BATCH seasons. And a little warning, I might have used some expletives

Uh, I'm probably making enemies with this one. I'll say right up front, just to be clear, this is just my guess, my perception. So the things I write next are not automatically facts and I don't automatically assume that they are, I'm just filling in some gaps with my HCs. To be honest, I had a few moments in the first season where I wasn't sure about Crosshair. I went back and forth between blaming his behavior on the chip or labeling him as "evil". Because we get a lot of we get a lot of information throughout the first season, that more or less cancels each other out and doesn't make sense as a whole. The chip might have had some influence at some point, but I honestly think, by far not as much as some may want to believe. So wich one ist it now? Chip or evil?

Basically though, I think it's neither one nor the other. Assuming the people behind TBB really thought that far, I think it's a lot more complicated than that. Well, there's a pinch of "asshole" with a huge load of "stubborn dickhead" on the side in Crosshair either way. At least in my opinion. But! I think his decisions stem more from the fact that everything around him has suddenly changed.

Being a soldier has always given him a purpose, a place in life, a task, something in which he saw function and meaning. His brothers suddenly want to leave it behind, and rightly so, but Crosshair is unsettled. If he were to join them, he would give up everything that has defined him so far, at least that's how he feels.

Try to imagine that something is happening around you and suddenly your whole life is about to be completely turned upside down and complicated. That would scare me, it would make me feel more than just uncomfortable. Because everyone is different, everyone reacts differently. Crosshair tries for a while to convince his brothers that it's right to continue to follow orders, because anything else could result in them being disbanded or separated.

The fact that Hunter wants to steer the group in a different direction scares him, because then he might soon be alone. I think that's one reason why in the course of the first season, before the batch is separated, he also goes on a confrontational course with his Sergeant.

Numerous decisions he has made, things he has done, are more than borderline, definitely reprehensible. But you have to remember, that's all he knows. Effectively following orders, that's what his whole life consisted of. There was no real childhood, no family life. Like all other clones, Crosshair was born into the life of a soldier. Crosshair is the kind of person who goes into emotional freefall when people try to take away what he feels is his destiny. So he does everything he can to prevent this from happening, he doesn't want to lose this place, this position, what he is used to.

The path he is taking is wrong, and I understand why some people assume that he is evil. However, I didn't think he was a psychopath at first, but a sociopath. Unfortunately, you get this impression in one or two scenes that I simply don't know how to explain or justify.

...where was I...

In the meantime, he wavers between anger and disappointment at his brothers, partly because they have let him down from his point of view, partly because their behavior could backfire on him and partly out of pure frustration. Someone who is already a rather difficult person, thrown into a situation like this, a man who has been conditioned to simply function as a soldier, I imagine that's much more complex than to just label him psycho and/or evil. None of this justifies some of his actions, murders I would call it, albeit on orders. I'm pretty sure he'll have to deal with that for quite a while, if he lives long enough, it's the kind of thing that haunts you to sleep. (In season 2, we have a moment after talking to Cody about soldiers, machines and decisions, where you get a little glimpse that Crosshair can have sleepless nights too, and I think that was the beginning of his self-reflection FINALLY!) We see at the end of the first season that he's not a complete ass, he saves Omega and also AZ, he acts like it's reluctant, but he knows it's the right thing to do, no one is forcing him to do it. Since Omega saved him before, he later mentions that they're even now, so you could read into that now, that he's using that as an excuse because he doesn't want to admit that he would have saved them either way. I'm just putting that assumption out there.

Now, in the second season, we see more and more clearly that his loyalty as a soldier is being trampled on by the Empire. In one specific episode in particular, in which Mayday unfortunately dies, we see very clearly how he realizes what status he has in the Empire, namely none at all. He's a clone, a special one, but just like the other clones, he's worth practically nothing. Cheap labor, cannon fodder, nothing more. Just looking at the gear of Mayday and his crew already screams it out loud, the empire doesn't give a damn about them. But then Mayday, the brother he tries to save, dies because of an Officer's neglect/ignorance/assholery (is that a word?) The realization is terrible, because he realizes that he basically always knew or should have known this. He now acts in extreme contrast to his previous attitude and kills a superior. The fact that he contacts his brothers and tries to warn them shows that he is trying to do the right thing. That he's still a Batcher at heart, that he cares, and that he doesn't care what happens to him as long as he can send out this warning. He must have realized that escape from Tantiss is highly unlikely, he doesn't even really try, his priority is to send this last message to his brothers. All in all, I don't think he's a psychopath. However, I do think he is emotionally/mentally broken.

My honest guess or thought is that there is/could be so much potential in this man, in a good way, if someone had ever taken the time to really nurture it.

Long Story short, he is actually sensitive and scared. Being the cold-hearted soldier is his way of dealing with it. Scared people do the worst shit sometimes. Fear leads to desperation, and the latter leads to fatal decisions. Like staying with the empire and killing people. 🤷🏻‍♀️

I feel like I just made a lot of excuses for that toothpick chewing problem child. I don't know how much of this is making sense, my head hurts 😅

And I admit I'm so afraid for each and every one of them in season 3.

#star wars #tbb #the bad batch #clone force 99 #sw tbb #crosshair #bad batch crosshair #clone trooper crosshair #commander crosshair #crosshair bad batch #crosshair tbb #crosshair the bad batch #tbb crosshair #the bad batch crosshair #my two cents #my head explodes why is the fever coming back

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yunarim · 4 months

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ಇ. broken melodies | chapter 5

⇢ ⁺ OBLIVION OF THE FULL MOON ˖ The secrets of the NRC start looming before Yuu.

— PREVIEW (read for tags and synopsis) — MASTERLIST (open to read previous chapters) — AO3

⁺ w.c : 9k+

Sweet delicate hibiscus aroma intertwined with notes of honey generously spilled into the black tea Yuu was drinking. Skirts of the school jacket she was wearing floated lazily, just as much as her hair disheveled from before, danced around. At one point she could have noticed how flying books tried to play with her blindingly white strands, but annoyance scalding within her veins made her stare at the refined tea; her reflection going with ripples on the liquid surface.

“Hm.”

She heard a sudden yelp coming from in front of her, but her gaze remained unswerving.

“Hmm.”

“Yuu…”

Elias let out a small laugh of embarrassment and received something resembling a snort from the portal.

“Not you too!” Elias exclaimed. “Come on, Yuu! You said it yourself that you want to see Vil!”

“Elias-san,” she finally glanced at him. “When I said that, I didn’t mean we must head out that instant. It’s literally ten in the evening!”

“Oh please, a little challenge never hurt anyone!”

“It’s not about challenge,” Yuu let out a sigh. “It’s about rules. You’re the dorm leader! What kind of example do you demonstrate to the residents of your dormitory?”

“Fine, mom, I got it. Next time it happens I warn my residents that we’re taking a little undercover trip to NRC. Man, imagine how disappointed they will be!”

“I am sure they will,” Yuu sighed again, taking a sip. “And as I’ve mentioned, I am not your mother, Elias-san.”

“You don’t get it,” he snorted. “They will be disappointed I didn’t take them with us.”

Yuu knitted her brows together at his statement.

“What else did I expect from the dorm which main foundation is curiosity…”

“Precisely!” Elias snapped his fingers, smiling dazzlingly at her. “Anyway! How do you find the tea?”

“It’s wonderful, no doubt, thank you very much,” Yuu nodded in defeat. “It lessens my worries.”

Yuu was nervous, to say at least.

She couldn’t define quite right how she felt at the thought of breaking the rules and basically intruding another school. From what she gathered, NRC students weren’t particularly fond of RSA ones, a hint of rivalry — to what extent? Healthy or not so? — lingered between. Plus, NRC most likely was an all-boys school as well, making it twice as hard for Yuu to proceed.

Ambrose said he will investigate her case on his own, not bringing her up to the public and government structures, and now she just went to the rival-school on her very whim. How foolish she was, letting everyone down! Stupid, absolutely stupid. Venturing forth into the den of potential problems was the last thing Yuu considered doing, and still found herself doing exactly this.

Elias’s energetic presence, although slightly tired as she noticed, was pretty much helping her stead herself and sort the thoughts out. She wasn’t alone, which meant two things: first, she had both moral and physical support on her way, and second, she took the responsibility for his actions, dragging him all the way. Spiky tingling feeling appeared in her stomach, turning it aching out of anxiety.

On the other hand, her initial task was to help. Who? Now that didn’t really matter. She was ready to help everyone in need, even if there was a whole world crying for aid — it was her only duty to provide.

Yuu thought of the Fairy Godmother, begging for strength internally, and closed her eyes for a mere second before opening them and witnessing Elias floating midair, searching for something.

“Elias-san?” She called, but he didn’t turn to her, albeit making a noise to demonstrate that he heard her. “What are you doing?”

“Well,” he dropped, pressing his hand to his chin, thinking. “We can’t just break into the NRC while wearing RSA uniform. I mean, I normally don’t travel there just for funsies. Damn, I think I need to go shopping to drop things into the portal next time.”

“We’re going to disguise ourselves?”

“Yeah, if I find something… Oh, that would do! Try this on!”

Yuu watched as he grabbed a piece of clothes out of the starry walls of the portal, and a simple black jacket appeared, then he threw it to Yuu.

“Leave your RSA jacket here,” Elias said and took off his own, throwing it into the portal abyss, its walls devouring it. “We’ll get changed when we’re coming back. Don’t worry, the portal has its own storage. You’re nice, so it might iron your clothes.”

“Is that so…” Yuu blinked in incomprehension at the amount of information, examining black jacket’s material. “Alright then.”

It most probably won’t do anything big, since they still were wearing RSA significant dark blue trousers and white blouses, but it still was at least something. Elias took off the bright blue brooch indicating his attachment to Pandora Charm, tucking it into his pocket.

Yuu followed his example and took off her white jacket of the RSA uniform, finding herself already missing it, as she grew quite fond of the whole concept of wearing uniform within school walls. She pulled the black jacket over herself, realizing that it probably belonged to Elias, because she basically drowned in its sleeves, its edges brushing over her thighs.

“Oh, right,” Elias took a look at her, standing in front of him and blinking plainly. “I forgot you’re tiny.”

“That is alright,” she shrugged, carefully putting her white jacket over the back of the chair and straightening it just in case. “That still would do as a disguise. It’s black, which makes us not as noticeable in the darkness. That is enough, I believe.”

“Yep!” Elias showed her thumbs up and turned around, not noticing how Yuu tried to recreate his odd gesture. “Now, off we go!”

He was about to take her hand, but jolted the second before actually doing it. He threw a quick uncertain glance at her, hesitating a bit, before she asked him. “Is everything alright, Elias-san?”

“Yeah, just wanted to take your hand when we jump out of the portal, but, uhm… It kinda looks like you don’t really like physical touch.”

Her eyes widened for a brief moment, lips parted at his precise observation. She frowned slightly and shook her head, then barely touched his palm with her cold fingers, thoroughly studying what she was feeling at this moment. Unfamiliar warmth spreading over her skin was strange, but bearable, and she nodded more to herself than to Elias, as if approving her own actions.

“I’m just unfamiliar with the concept, but I think I don’t really mind the idea of getting used to it. Gradually, that is.”

“Got it! Thank you for sharing,” he smiled brightly and took her hand in his, squishing it tightly and throwing a conspiratorial look at her. “Ready?”

“Yes, let’s go.”

And with that they jumped out of the portal.

When they land on, Yuu was very much surprised to find herself entirely intact. She didn’t know what to expect from the infamous NRC everyone mentioned ever so often, and stood up at once.

“Where exactly are we…” She mumbled, examining her surroundings and realizing they fell into bushes. She brushed off the leaves, carefully stepping out of it.

“I don’t know, heh,” Elias giggled as he did the same, turning his head from left to right, studying where they actually landed.

“You don’t know?..” Yuu echoed. “Did we just force an entrance to NRC without knowing where exactly we are?”

“Precisely!” Elias laughed. “I mean, that’s only my second time traveling here through the portal! I can’t control our destination at this point.”

“I fear asking what the first time resulted in,” Yuu replied, dusting the jacket.

“It was broad daylight then, plus it was career guidance day, so everyone was welcomed to visit. I just chose the way I find most comfortable for myself~”

Yuu hummed in response and turned around, scanning the surroundings they happened to appear in.

The difference was drastic, striking Yuu with a feeling of being completely lost. RSA campus, even lit with a moon’s radiance flowing through the night, brought comfort and the feeling of domestic coziness and tranquility.

NRC buildings that loomed before Yuu’s widened eyes were gothic in their style, and, unlike RSA ones, appeared magnificent. RSA, without any doubt, was an exquisite establishment, but NRC was far from being called exquisite — more likely sublime, dignified, resplendent. Almost menacing in a manner of speaking. The darkness of the night covered the place not with comfort, but with a palpable danger crawling in the bushes.

Horrendous beauty, if Yuu had to put it in two words. What’s even more strange, Yuu could almost compare the design and the whole atmosphere spreading in this place with the mansion in her world. The same sharp towers upfolding before her eyes, the same feeling of eternal obscurity covering her body in soiree embrace, and the same amount of giant trees which brought some comfort into the whole picture — what a peculiar place…

Although she wouldn’t have guessed it was a school if she were to travel here without knowing it.

Elias spoke, making her quit her sudden concentration at scanning the surroundings.

“Hmm, Yuu, can you please tie your hair?”

She blinked. “Huh? Is something the matter?..”

“Not really, your hair is just… Really white,” he explained, knitting his brows together. “Like, blindingly white. They almost glow in the moonlight.”

“Ah,” she muttered. “I see. I’m sorry for the inconvenience. Wait a second.”

She found a red ribbon in her pockets and lifted her hair up, tying it in a big bun. Some strands slipped out, falling on her collarbones, and she made a small ‘tsk’ sound, trying to tuck them back.

“It’s okay,” Elias reassured her and approached her small figure, fishing out some hair pins out of his one pocket. “May I?”

“Yes, go ahead.”

His way of making hair was quite clumsy and messy, but she felt the experience of doing it quickly as he tucked the remaining strands of her hair back. He himself possessed rather long and unruly hair, and, given his giddy and energetic nature, apparently experienced hair getting straight into the face when it wasn’t convenient, quite often.

“Okay, cool!” He concluded, taking one step from Yuu and appreciating their work together. “You’re still almost glowing, but we lowered the risk.”

“I suggest we lower it even more by speaking quietly,” she whispered, realizing that Elias’s voice was quite bright and noticeable, now that they appeared in the night. “And, Elias-san… Thank you for helping me.”

“No probs,” he winked at her and nodded. “Now, let’s investigate.”

“Alright… Do you know any noticeable places here?”

“Hm… Nothing in particular,” Elias whispered, waving his hand, so to indicate that Yuu must follow him, so she did. “The thing is, everyone knows Vil, for he is a celebrity, but we’re going to find him as a student, right? I know he’s a dorm leader, but no idea which one exactly.”

“He is a dorm leader too?” Yuu whispered in surprise, walking by Elias’s side. “He must be a very admirable person, as Neige said…”

And just as scary , Yuu thought internally. Him being such a big figure in this school wasn’t really helpful to Yuu in the matter of approaching him in the first place.

She tried to imagine what would happen when she finally meets him. What would she even say? Hello, I’m Neige’s acquaintance, I thought you might be suffering, let me help you? Foolish. Absolutely foolish, she concluded.

Being a natural doer rather than a planner, Yuu decided to gather some information first, which meant that it would be alright if they didn’t encounter Vil today (it would be even the best option, saying frankly), but she at least needed to know which dorm he belonged to.

Crawling in the night, she and Elias made it out of the forest they landed in, and silhouettes of distinguishable buildings loomed before them.

Yuu, being pretty quiet given her tiny figure and the natural way she walked, made almost no sound as they proceeded further, but obviously lacked the experience in being sneaky. That differed her from Elias, who was taller, stronger in his physique, but evidently had something stealthy about him in the way he was moving.

Yuu couldn’t recall if she had experienced this kind of a sneaky mission, but followed Elias, hiding behind the walls occasionally if they heard gusts of wind screaming in the night.

Even despite keeping on going pretty much successfully until now, Yuu noticed how fast her heart pounded in her chest at the thought of being caught. It might be all over once someone discovers them. The trust Ambrose put in her might just crumble, the responsibility for dragging Elias in her venture smashing her down, the weight of the mission the Fairy Godmother entrusted her killing her inside — all of that.

“I don’t recognize this building,” Elias silently said, Yuu almost bumped into him. “This campus is ridiculously big.”

“What do we do then?” Yuu whispered, becoming one with shadows as she moved to the side where a line of trees loomed.

“Proceed further, of course~” Elias said, giving a little nod and pointing out the building farther ahead. “It looks like the main building, if I’m seeing it right. Let’s go.”

They walked around the building that served as a little hiding construction, then approached the gates and found themselves on the foot of the small mountain, where the main building stood.

Lights were off, indicating that no one was probably there, although Yuu shouldn’t just brush the possibility off.

She felt a little bit more loose, sensing that no one was really around, and allowed herself to walk slightly less tensed. Elias, apparently noticing it himself, followed her example, and took his phone out of the pocket of his trousers. Yuu watched him with unconcealed curiosity as he stared at the screen and touched a small white button. She didn’t say anything, continuing her own observation and trying to figure out what was the point of this chain of quick actions.

Feeling her inquiring gaze on himself, Elias chuckled and whispered softly. “I’m taking photos.”

“Yes?” Yuu questioned. “Photos?”

“Girl, don’t you have photography in your world or something?” Elias decided not to pry on the matter further on, since Yuu only let out a little confused noise. “Let me put it this way. I capture this place with my phone, and the next time we travel here, I recognize where we are. Quite the strategy, yeah?”

“Oh,” she muttered. “It certainly sounds witty. You’re very smart, Elias-san.”

“That I am, yes~” Adorable ‘he-he’ escaped his lips as a response, and they kept on moving forward.

Come to think of it, NRC appeared to be just as huge as the RSA campus was. While enjoying the late evening’s cold but not unpleasant breeze, Yuu took a deep breath, calming her thoughts, and threw a quick glance at Elias, who apparently finished taking photos or so that he named the process.

“Elias-san,” Yuu mumbled, guided by her natural penchant for knowledge. “If I’m not burdening you with my curiosity, may I ask you a question?”

“Sure thing,” he nodded shortly. “Ask right away!”

“How exactly does your portal work? You managed to get us straight to the library back in RSA, but here we landed in an unknown spot, not to mention which is quite far from the main building.”

“Ah, that,” he chuckled, glancing over and suggesting taking another route, to which Yuu shortly lowered her head in a little nod. “Well, I can cast a portal leading to the place I’ve already been before. The distance doesn’t really matter, I assume, although I haven’t traveled really far.” He tiredly rubbed his eyes with his hand and suppressed a yawn which already was ready to leave his throat. “For example, no matter how hard I would want to visit, I don’t know, let’s say Coral Sea , I couldn’t. Simply because I haven’t been there before.”

“I see…” Yuu replied, arranging her thoughts. “But you’ve been to NRC before, as you’ve mentioned.”

“Yeah,” he agreed. “The first time was when I was a highschooler. Students from all over the world gather here, visit both RSA and NRC and consider enrolling in one of the establishments.” He explained.

“You thought of joining NRC?”

“Right, you probably don’t know. RSA and NRC are top-tier schools, it’s the dream of every magic-user to get enrolled either in one or another. When the time comes and you graduate from whichever school you attended before, you get an invitation. I got enrolled in RSA, as you can see.”

“What are the requirements of getting enrolled in NRC?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “You saw it yourself when Excalibur was assigning newcomers according to the dorms they fit in. Somethin’ has to do with your personality alignment or so.”

Personality alignment, hm… Yuu wondered what was the real deal behind the process. RSA had its certain atmosphere which distinguished it from others, that was for sure, but Yuu had little time getting to know what exactly it was. Now, if NRC possessed something unique for them as well, then…

“Anyway,” Elias continued as they approached the road with huge tall lanterns alongside it. “The less times I’ve visited one place, the higher the chance of getting bumped into something unexpected when portal-traveling.”

“I see,” Yuu nodded. “Thank you for the explanation.”

“Seeing how curious you are, it’s a pity you’re not a member of Pandora Charm. You’ve got the spirit.”

You smiled in response and tensed instantly as they got extremely close to the point of their destination. Huge, enormously huge building loomed before them as they stood before the entrance.

“No, we’re not getting in through the main entrance,” he said, meeting with Yuu’s confused eyes. “The door’s probably locked and I’m not in the mood for triggering a signalization or something. Let’s find another way.”

“I feel like a criminal…”

“We’re not criminals,” Elias said. “Just adventurers!”

“Alright, let’s hope no one doubts your statement if we get caught…”

“I’ll make sure we don’t.”

They then made their way to the left. Yuu and Elias were bending down to pass under the windows as unnoticed as possible. Elias was peering inside from time to time, making sure that no one saw them, and was nodding to Yuu, in response to which she continued sneaking around.

She was stressing out deeply, her thoughts becoming a mess with worry rolling down her whole body. The closer they were getting, the more anxious she felt. Yuu bumped into Elias’s back and produced suppressed yelp when he pressed his index finger to his lips, and then nodded to the window…

Which appeared to be opened.

“And now let’s pray we’re not getting caught~” Elias giggled and approached the window, examining what was the best way for getting inside. “Okay, I can lift you up, you get inside, then help me doing the same.”

“Oh… Do you think I will manage to help you?” She pried, looking slightly worried, unsure of her own strength and competence.

“I’m hurt in the best way! You don’t think I’m too heavy?” Elias snorted and laughed playfully. “No worries, everything will be okay. Now, get on my shoulders.”

“Wait, Elias-san,” Yuu stopped him, grabbing the sleeve of his jacket. “Let me first handle it.”

“Hm?”

“Little one, I need your help.”

Elias watched as Yuu winced at the sight of bright pinkish sparkles bursting in the air, but relaxed as a pink butterfly appeared.

“Please vent forth for me,” she said, and the butterfly flew through the opened window.

“Oh, the pink one!” Elias noticed, his voice raising slightly in excitement. Yuu waved her hands, signaling him to lower it a bit, and he covered his mouth with his hands. “Sorry, sorry. But say, what do the pink ones do?”

“Pink butterflies are the best talkers,” she explained. “And they also can fly very far away from me. I normally summon them if I need to investigate the terrain.”

“How curious!”

The butterfly found its way back to Yuu, landing on her nose, and Elias watched them as they performed something close to talking, or so it seemed, as Yuu were nodding and humming.

“I see, thank you,” she closed her eyes for a moment. “The path is clear, we may proceed. Although it’s very dark inside, you might need a torch…”

“Torch?” Elias blinked. “Woah, easy, no need to go that far. I’ve got a flashlight ready in my phone if it’s necessary, but we can’t afford being caught, yeah? Plus, you too might need one, no?”

Yuu bit her lip, realizing Elias didn’t know she had an enhanced vision. Seeing in the dark was as simple as breathing for her, but how in the world must she explain to him the whole package of abilities that faes possessed?..

“I b-believe you’re right,” she stuttered.

“No worries, we’ve come this far, we’ll be alright. Okay, now get on.”

Elias turned her back at her, falling on one knee, ready to lift her up. Yuu frowned, being not entirely sure of the whole concept of getting lifted up, but took a light step nevertheless, and squeaked when Elias chuckled and almost set her flying with how much force he put in the action.

“W-woah, sorry!!”

“I-it is alright,” she mumbled, grabbing onto the window handles for her dear life, obviously not expecting that much strength from Elias’s fit, but elegant figure. She wondered where in the world he hid that force, but decided not to pry on the matter right at the moment, as they were engaged in this silly situation.

After crawling on the inner windowsill and quickly eyeing her current surroundings, confirming that everything was clear, she peeked out of the window, meeting with Elias’s questioning eyes.

“Clear?” He only asked.

“Clear,” she nodded, making her position firm and steady, and outstretched her hand. “Here, grab it.”

“Here I go!”

Elias grabbed her hand, his tendons becoming prominent against his pale skin, highlighting the amount of force he had put into his grip, and braced himself with one foot against the wall and pressed the other into the ground, preparing to leap. Yuu winced, not noticing how beads of sweat rolled from her forehead due to exertion, and her cheeks turned red, but she did not let go of Elias’s hand.

Elias made a noise, Yuu’s whole body almost bumping into the wall she was leaning against when Elias tugged her closer to the window as he jumped. She groaned, biting her lip, so the sound died out that instant. Elias finally made it inside, leaping above Yuu’s head, and landed on the ground with a loud thud, then performed a somersault, almost hitting the bookcase that stood nearby.

“W-woah!”

Yuu, feeling dizzy from the full breaking inside experience she didn’t really want to receive in the first place, breathed in and out heavily, trying to regain composure. The butterfly she summoned earlier flying in worry above her head.

“You okay?!”

Elias jumped on his feet, absolutely intact, and flashed to Yuu’s side, grabbing her shoulders and giving them a slight shake.

“Yes… I think,” she nodded. “Do you think someone heard you landing here?”

“I like to believe that they didn’t,” he smiled whimsically. “In any case, I’m glad you’re fine.”

“I am,” she confirmed, jumping from the windowsill, landing on her feet soundlessly, as if she was a cat. “Just not really accustomed to such activities.”

“Sorry,” he apologized. “You’re quite tiny, so…”

“I am not,” she pouted, much to Elias’s amusement.

“As you say, mo-”

“If you’re about to call me mother again, next time you’re doing it all by yourself.”

“Woah-woah, you’re a menacing one! And then you hear them talk of you as if you’re a pure, naive baby.”

“I beg your pardon?..” Yuu tilted her head while Elias was standing up.

“Shit,” Elias cursed. “Sorry, didn’t want to bring that up. Some students say you’re quite… gullible. Innocent.”

Innocent?

Yuu didn’t hear herself snorting at his words.

She felt disgust forming in her chest. How wanted she for it to be true, to be innocent and pure, untouched by the foolishness she possessed. It would be so much simpler if she was a naive young girl, genuinely trying to help everyone in need.

She wasn’t pure at all, and it was burning her to the ashes. She was instructed to help, and while carrying sincere intent to help, initially it was her aim, not her honest desire. Perhaps she was afraid to find that she hasn’t tried enough, that her feelings were clouded with egotistic will to explore this world, abandoning her task.

The thought of failing the Fairy Godmother burst within, making her breathe in sharply, and shake her head. No, no, it wasn’t the right time for her stupid brooding. She already ventured here to find Vil — either to help him or to help Neige. Truly, completely this time.

“Yuu?”

“Nothing,” she forced a smile. “I was just thinking, forgive me for that ungraceful display. Let us proceed. Do you know where we are?”

“It’s the storage room, I think,” he tilted his head to where buckets and mops were. “Let’s get out of here.”

He approached the door, slowly turning its handle to the right and opening it. He peeked out, recognizing the darkness that Yuu spoke of, and slowly went into the hall, waving at Yuu so as she went after him.

So she did, feeling the pressure of being trapped in four walls, and realized that there weren’t many places for hiding. Long, large halls with gothic lanterns and columns welcomed them as they carefully sneaked alongside them.

“I think I know where we are,” Elias whispered weightlessly, when Yuu looked at the clock and widened her eyes, realizing it was already 11 pm. “I hope we’ll find a desk with a student list somewhere or something like that.”

Yuu hummed in approval, following his careful footsteps.

A majestic atmosphere reigned in the corridors, shrouded in the cold of the night. Walking through the ornate halls, Yuu managed to cast quick glances at the portraits of people unknown to her, apparently professors of this institution. The sophisticated architecture of this place was very different from the more inviting and friendly RSA, within the walls of which there was a feeling of homeliness and tranquility. NRC made her feel slightly odd, but Yuu wasn't sure if the school in general made her feel that way, or if the fact of intrusion made Yuu swallow nervously.

Elias was about to turn right when Yuu concentrated her vision and noticed that the door to the left was slightly opened. She parted her lips, ready to warn him, but the sudden rageous howl roamed through the place, and Yuu shifted to her left, trying to become one with the wall, when Elias got it to the right, sneaking behind the corner.

With heart pounding in her chest, Yuu noticed how far from her Elias had retreated, and nervously bit her lip, quickly trying to make her way to him while going unnoticed. He threw a quick glance at her, literally eyeing her to come to him, but she hesitated.

“Don’t you just hate it?!”

A female voice cut through the place, making Yuu jolt and start panicking.

“Shit!” Elias whispered, swiftly rolling over to her and weightlessly murmuring an incantation to open the portal. “Let’s go!!”

Black hole of the portal appeared before him, and with one leg already in it, he reached out to grab Yuu’s hand, but it slipped, and Elias fell to the portal.

All alone .

“Elias-san!!”

“Wh— YUU?! Waaaaait! ”

His last call faded in darkness as the portal closed, Yuu remained sitting on the cold marble floor and frustratingly staring at the spot where the hole just was.

“Did you hear it?” A female voice pried, but no one appeared nearby, much to Yuu’s relief.

“No. You need some sleep, you start speaking nonsense,” male voice followed, apparently letting out a yawn.

“Oh come on, you’re making it unbearable. I just HATE those curtains.”

Wait. Curtains?.. What…

Yuu frowned, regaining composure, and decided to take the risk. She approached the door to the classroom where the voices were heard, and peeked in.

“Wh—” She quickly suppressed the urge to let the confusion slip from her lips.

Were they… paintings?

She focused her vision, recognizing two portraits, one of a young beautiful woman, and another of a man, hung on the wall so they couldn’t see her. Their silhouettes remained firm, the woman’s hands rested on the skirt of her expensive dress, but her lips were parting as she talked!

“It’s so dull,” she commented. “And we’re on the dark side of the wing.”

“So?” The portrait of a man sighed without showing any interest in her monologue.

“So!” She insisted, clearly annoyed. “I’m telling Mozus that these stupid curtains went out of fashion already in Baroque. Ugh.”

“I don’t think he’ll change them…”

“I don’t care what he thinks.”

Yuu quietly returned back to the corridor, slowly closing the door and blinking away all the confusion she had just experienced.

Talking paintings. Talking… paintings, huh.

Well, at least she hadn’t been caught, that was certainly relieving, although not really much due to Elias’s disappearance.

She sighed in defeat, carefully considering her next step. Now what? She doesn’t know the territory as well as Elias’s current location. Maybe the best she can do now is to search for him.

So she decided, sending the pink butterfly further ahead and carefully investigating the place all by herself.

After Yuu walked around more than a dozen seemingly endless corridors and checked at least as many classrooms, she tiredly leaned against the wall, feeling her temples pulsating and her eyelids filling with lead. A whole night without adequate sleep made her feel exhausted, but she quickly blinked away these sensations, following the butterfly as if it was a saving light, and pulled the doorknob.

A noisy, cold wind hit her face and she quickly stepped outside, finding herself on the other side of campus.

Breathing in freely after being trapped in four walls, she decided to simply walk ahead, guided by her intuition. Exploring it is, she thought, already abandoning the thought of finding Vil today.

Up ahead before her eyes loomed a very dilapidated building. What a curious finding, she thought, studying it while making her way towards. After venturing through the exquisite corridors, this place felt almost surreal and very odd, almost magical in a way. Following her natural curiosity, Yuu made her way to the entrance, her fingers brushing over dilapidated fence boards, but had to stop at once, jolting.

Far ahead, before the very entrance to the strange decayed building, was standing a young man.

Yuu's gaze traveled over his tall, stately figure and stopped at... were they horns? How delightful.. Yuu was fascinated by the intricate curls of his horns, descending her stare to his pointed ears, the tips of which playfully peeked out from under the coal-black strands of his hair that fell onto his shoulders. His bangs framed his chiseled cheekbones, slightly covering the thoughtful, even mythical look of the picturesque emeralds of his eyes. The brilliance of his enchanting gaze, like a firefly imprisoned in the iris of his eyes, was reflected under the light of the full moon towering above him.

Yuu exhaled meekly, realizing that she had stopped breathing for a split second, mesmerized by the beauty of this young man.

Finally slipping out of the magnetism coming from this boy, she realized that he had pointed ears, just as well as she had. Gasping at the realization, she studied him closely.

“Another… fae?” She muttered under her breath. “But how—”

The pink butterfly rushed towards the young man, and Yuu gasped, released from the grasp of his ethereal beauty.

“Come back, little one!” She whispered, but to no avail — the butterfly ignored her plea, as if glued to the man. At least that Yuu could understand.

She noticed him turning to where she stood, and lurked back into the shadows, holding a fading hope that he didn’t notice her. Curse faes and their enhanced instincts!!

Still, crawling in the darkness, she stowed the thoughts of the boy gently picking out his finger for the butterfly to land on it deep into her mind, and ignored the rapid beating of her heart.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Yuu didn’t know where she found herself again, but at least the fact she was completely lost was pretty much clear. Fatigue shackled her movements, making it hard to proceed, but she did nevertheless, trying to ignore how much sleep she was lacking. Even with her fae inheritance and natural ability to stay awake longer than humans did felt as consciousness was wavering.

Maybe it also became the reason why she didn’t notice a rustle coming from the bushes nearby, and yelped, realizing there was no time to hide, as something just rushed towards her.

It was the time she must face the consequences. It is over. Now, for real.

“Hm?”

Squeaky voice reached her ears… from beneath? Yuu was ready to lift her head, since most people she happened to talk to were much taller than herself, but this time was different. She lowered her head instead, her eyes widening at once.

“Why are you starin’ at me like that?”

Yuu blinked once. Twice.

A cat-looking creature with its ears fur burning with bright, blinding blue light stared at her in response, its paws on its, uh, hips? What kind of anatomy did this creature actually possess, standing on its two legs in a very humanoid way, but being obviously animalistic itself?

Its pitchfork-shaped tail wagged in irritation at Yuu’s silent confusion before it snapped at her for staring once again.

“Ay, human!”

“I’m afraid I am not exactly—”

“Who the hell are you?”

“I am—”

“Nah, wait,” it produced a sound resembling a meow, much to Yuu’s absolutely devastated expression. “Whaddya want ‘ere?”

“I—”

“Oh,” the creature interrupted her again, but apparently being completely oblivious to the fact. “You smell nice. Like somethin’ sweet. Honey?”

Yuu decided to remain silent just to see what would happen next.

“Oi, why are you shut up?”

“Because you—”

“Actually—”

“Argh!!”

Yuu growled, which she didn’t see coming in no lifetime at all, surprised to find herself to give a reaction like that. She lowered herself, bending her knees so as to be at one level with the creature.

“Little magical cat-san,” she started, sensing how hyped up the creature became, and hushed it with her finger. “If you dislike being called that way, please introduce yourself, so I might do the same.”

“How could you not know the Great Grim!”

“Y-yes?” Yuu frowned, losing her grip on the situation.

“Ya know, the Great Grim,” the cat ‘hmph’ed at her for being, apparently, ignorant. “Doesn’t ring a bell?”

“I’m afraid it doesn’t, I’m sorry… Grim-san.”

“Sama!” He corrected her, leaning towards with an angry stare.

“Grim…-sama,” Yuu decided to play along. “My name is Yuu. Nice to meet you.”

“Never heard of you tho,” Grim shrugged.

Of course you didn’t, Yuu thought to herself, but smiled as the creature didn’t look very bothered or confused to see her.

“So, whaddya need? Those little bastards like to think they’re oh so smart and nice to go to their beds at 10, heh. You must be the naughty type. Or do you want somethin’ to eat as well? Late night snacks are the best ones.”

Yuu flew deeper into her thoughts. Grim happened to be the type to actually talk to her normally, if she could put it that way, which gave her a light beam of hope that he might help. Carefully analyzing Grim’s words — or rather, trying to decipher the slang — she hummed.

If she already encountered this little creature, maybe she could ask for help? What’s worse might happen?

.. Right?

“I’m looking for someone,” she probed cautiously.

“Who exactly?”

“Do you know a person named Vil Schoenheit? He’s a student at this school.”

Grim frowned and Yuu wondered how she could understand its expressions so easily, given the creature wasn’t humanoid at any rate.

“Yeah, I know him,” Grim replied, and Yuu’s eyes sparkled in delight. Finally! “Wanna me get you to him?”

“You could?!” She clapped her hands joyfully.

“For a price, yeah,” Grim nodded, Yuu’s lighten expression dropping its radiance as she realized that nothing could be that easy, but either way nodded for the creature to continue. “Bring me somethin’ to eat.”

“Y-yes?” She questioned.

“Humans these days,” Grim clicked his tongue in irritation. “Food. I wanna eat, ya know?”

“Yes, I understand… Alright then. How about you get me to Vil Schoenheit and I'll give you some?”

“Hmmm…” Grim stared at her, trying to detect if she deceived it, and even if it wasn’t in her plans at all, she decided to switch his attention just to be sure it’ll help.

“What food do you like the most?” She asked, seeing how Grim’s eyes started glowing with interest.

“Tuna,” was his outright answer. “Anything to do with seafood. Fish. Meat. Sandwiches! Oooh, also—”

“Tuna it is,” Yuu concluded before Grim was carried away. “Now, Grim-sa..ma, would you please be so kind to help me find Vil?”

“Follow my lead, henchman.”

“Henchman?..”

But Grim already ignored her incoherent noises and proceeded further. “Ya follow me or not? Vil’s busy dude, come on faster.”

“Yes, sorry. Please, lead on.”

So Grim did, and with that little cat-looking creature she felt much safer to walk on the streets. Maybe it was stupid of her — to let her guard down as she walked alongside, not sensing much fear of getting caught as she did before.

It was probably due to Grim’s odd, but funny entity. Somehow with having a feline creature around, the surroundings didn’t seem as dark as they were before.

Yuu was answering Grim’s silly questions while they were making their way, such as ‘What your favorite food is’ or ‘Why are you so tiny for a human’, which genuinely made her laugh in relief, but soon enough she felt her mind slip away again, not standing the fatigue towering over her and taking her whole body in its lazy embrace.

Tiredness felt different for her as a fae, and while she could stay awake much longer than humans, she was exhausted after a fight, not sleeping properly with Neige around, then the following day was quite an eventful one, and now, when she in the best case scenarios she might have found herself sleeping peacefully, she was exploring the school she had slightest idea about, trying to find a person she has never ever seen.

Her instincts went numb before that exact fatigue, and maybe Grim was thoughtful enough to ignore her silence, or maybe it didn’t really matter, because she could still recognize the creature’s endless monologue about food going on and on pretty lively and frivolously.

She also missed the moment where Grim pointed that it was already midnight, looking over her weary expression. As easily as that, she also failed to notice that they entered the main building again, making their way to an unfamiliar place that she hadn’t encountered before.

A look of fear clouded her face when she finally escaped her tired thoughts and bumped into a person .

Now this time, it was an actual student. A person, who most probably possessed no desire to hear out her silly explanations and excuses.

“You stupid henchman!” Grim yelled at her when she jumped out of the person she stumbled into and massaged her nose. “Look where you goin’!”

“I am deeply sorry!” She almost screamed at the person she smashed herself into, bowing as low as she could.

“Hey, it’s no big deal!”

The voice that she heard in response was masculine, but also pleasant. Yuu didn’t know what she was expecting in the first place, but it was at least nice to be reassured.

She straightened her back, preparing herself to whatever might come next, and opened her eyes.

Before her stood a young boy, visibly shorter than the one she saw near that dilapidated building, but not only did he look as if he possessed more of a youthful touch, his eyes also were more vigorous, so to say.

A pair of big, widened teal eyes stared at her in confusion as she scanned him further, her own gaze stopping at the curious dark blue pattern that matched the color of his short hair. Was it a sign of spades?.. Yuu frowned, not noticing how she leaned slightly forward to examine it closer, but the boy yelped and stepped away, his cheeks and the tips of the ears reddening at once.

“A-a girl?!”

Now that she was fully awake after hearing the exclamation, she stepped away in a jump as well, trying to cover her face with her hands, but realized it was simply useless the second after. Curiosity won, and she turned back to him, throwing a childish peek at the way he was stressing himself out.

“I’m sorry!” She managed to say, the boy stopping at once. “C-can we please talk?..”

That - that!! - was awful. That was over, for sure. At last she was found and caught red-handed. Not only was he a student, given she noticed the sports uniform on his fit body and the emblem of the school, but he also made it clear that it was against the rules for a girl to simply be here. Not to mention that late at night!

“What the freaking hell?!” He groaned.

“Why are you yellin’, you stupid Deuce?” Grim intervened. “Do you see a girl for the first time in your life or what?”

“It’s not that!” He took a deep breath before taking a more proper look at Yuu, who just awkwardly stood there.

“Pardon me…” She probed to make a normal conversation, but her strategy failed again.

“Am I seeing things?” The boy apparently named Deuce threw a glance full of genuine confusion. “No, no, wait… Argh, really, what the hell…”

“The girl begged me for help,” Grim said, now catching Yuu’s attention with his wording. “And I’m providing her with it, while you’re being all that screaming mess.”

“So you’re a girl,” Deuce concluded, massaging his temples but stopping at once. “Wait, asked for help? What do you mean, Grim?”

“She cried and kneeled before the Great Grim, begging for help,” Grim tried impersonating whatever was on its mind, when Yuu looked at him in total disbelief.

“So…” Deuce finally calmed down a bit, his eyes fixated on Yuu. “No way I’m believing Grim in this situation, he always tends to speak nonsensical, don’t mind him.”

So it’s him , Yuu thought, making a mental note to herself.

“But is that true? That you need some help or something.”

“I… yes, that much is true,” she confirmed, exhaustion crawling back into its lair within her body, making her words slightly incoherent.

“Uh,” he pressed a hand to his chin, losing in thoughts. “First, who even are you and why shouldn’t I just throw you out of here?..”

He spoke as if he wasn’t sure himself if he really intended to do as he said, or was he trying to convince himself that it was the only right reaction to give.

Yuu noticed how tense he was, perhaps understandably, yet something felt different about NRC itself and its inhabitants in particular. Grim was a magical creature, not a person (at least he appeared to be that). That tall boy with horns was an embodiment of magic itself, and while Ivy gave off the similar atmosphere about him, that black-haired young man felt extraterrestrial, and distant. Far, galaxies away different.

And now there was Deuce, who despite his gentle-looking eyes still expressed mistrust and wariness towards her.

She tried to regain composure and mumbled. “I… I am looking for someone in this school.”

“Go on.”

“I am looking for…” She took a small pause, but Deuce’s face remained unreadable. “Vil Schoenheit. Do you know him?”

“Schoenheit-senpai?!” He suddenly exclaimed, covering his mouth in surprise and returning his gaze filled with worry to Yuu. “And why would you seek him?”

“He… he might need my help… That is.”

“Are you really sure?..”

But Yuu couldn’t say more as she felt exhaustion devouring her, her eyes losing their brightness and vivid red hue, turning darker and wearier.

“Why did you bring her here, Grim?” Deuce asked.

“I thought I'd kinda dump her on the first dude I find, but it’s you, so I don’t know now.”

“Grim!” He raised his voice with clear annoyance. “Ugh… What do I even do…”

He peered over Yuu, as if trying to gather something from the way she blankly stared at him back, but to no avail.

“What an exemplary student would do…” He mumbled to himself, rest of the sentences going almost unheard. “She’s an intruder, but it’s more likely that she herself needs help… Argh!”

“I am sorry,” she bowed again, but not as deeply as she did for the first time, causing Deuce to look at her questionably. “I am sorry for causing trouble, and it’s absolutely understandable that you’re not pleased to see me here. If… if that is alright by you, please show me the exit, and you will not see me again.”

“Hey, no need to go that far…” His voice softened at her apology.

“Is the exit nearby then?”

“No, I didn’t mean that!!” He quickly corrected himself. “Look, uhm, you see, it’s kinda late, plus I’m going back to the dorm after a workout, so I need to at least change my clothes and things.. But I can take you to my dorm leader, he might help!”

“You can?” Her eyes widened in surprise. “I would be so, so grateful!”

“Y-yeah,” he nodded. “Come on, follow me. And Grim!” He stared down the cat-looking creature. “Don’t fool around with the visitors!”

“Intruders, ya mean.”

“Hold your tongue, would you?”

“He’s actually right,” Yuu said softly. “I am no visitor, breaking into your school so late at night.”

“Uh, yeah, but you kinda…”

“Yes?..”

“Don’t fit the vibe of an intruder, as one wouldn’t likely admit the fact of intrusion in the first place,” Deuce concluded. “Besides, it’s not that late. Though it’s kinda strange that there’s no one around at 8 pm.”

“Stupid Deuce,” Grim chuckled. “It’s midnight already.”

“IT’S WHAT NOW?!”

Yuu jolted at the way he yelled, his eyes flew to the clock on the wall, and it was the moment Yuu finally examined the room with seven different portals.

“Freaking shit!” Deuce cursed, taking off from his place and jumping to the portal at his left. “Dorm leader Rosehearts will finish me off for missing the curfew!!”

Yuu watched Deuce disappearing in the portal before realizing she pursued him, diving into the portal above of which a heart-shaped emblem and the name ‘ Heartslabyul ’ was written, and closed her eyes when the magical ripples absorbed her body and transported it to an unknown place.

Scarcely had she opened her eyes, she was struck by an absolutely stunning construction towering over her. The amount of hearts in the design threw a thought or two into her mind about how utterly familiar it all seemed, but she quickly dismissed everything, focusing on the strong rose scent.

She found Deuce rushing forward straight to the entrance and proceeded after him, running around the fountain and heart-shaped trees on the sides. Were there roses blooming on them?.. Ah, no it wasn’t the right time to think about it!

With the lights off she barely noticed Grim running along with her, whining about how tiresome running itself was and how no one actually gave him food in the end, much to Yuu’s embarrassment and inner anxiety rise. She promised him, yes, but after being mingled into Deuce’s rush, she made a mental note to repay him later, even in spite of the fact he didn’t help to begin with.

Deuce was just about to reach the door and sway it open when the doors almost knocked him down, if only he hadn't dodged them opening.

“Wow, easy, dude!”

A familiar vivid and playful tone rolled on Yuu’s pointed ears, and she lifted her gaze, meeting with none other than Elias himself.

“Elias-san!” She exclaimed, now rushing up ahead to him, forgetting about Deuce and Grim, but stopped abruptly when she saw another person on Elias’s right.

The boy, who was slightly shorter than Elias, swiftly put his eyes on Yuu, examining her figure in return. She didn’t mind as his pry red eyes studied her, focusing on the pattern matching the color of his eyes — red heart was drawn with careful precision. Yuu frowned, when a thought slithered into her mind, forcefully thrusting forth the idea of the spade on Deuce’s face and the heart on that boy’s rather interesting to consider. Images of the past flashed within her head, but she couldn’t fish out one in particular as the moment wasn’t right.

“Yuu!” Elias lifted his blue eyes at her as she approached him and the unfamiliar boy and made her way to her, carefully paying close attention to her appearance. “Are you alright?!”

“I am, do not worry,” she reassured him, side-eying Deuce who approached the boy with red eyes and catching the glimpses of his worried noises about time. “And that is?..”

She pointed at the boy with a nod, to which Elias only chuckled and turned to the subject of their current discussion. “Care to introduce yourself?”

“I was just about to do that when you rushed to that girl without any explanation,” the boy’s cheeky tone was quite fine and even nice to hear, Yuu noticed. “Besides, maybe Deuce could introduce her, hm?”

“You don’t get it!” Deuce shook his head. “Is dorm leader Rosehearts mad?!”

“Sure is, what else did you expect, ha!” The boy laughed menacingly.

“Damn,” Deuce frowned. “I’m doomed. Like, completely.”

“Who isn’t,” the red-eyed boy shrugged. “He’s a complete madman these days.”

“Ace!” Deuce insisted, revealing the boy’s name. “Don’t say that about the dorm leader.”

“Why though? Dude’s losing it.”

“I… hate to admit you’re half right.”

“Not just half,” Ace smirked. “I’m always right. Anyways, you there.” He called Yuu, attracting her attention to him. “Nice to meet ya. Did you cause a heart attack for Deuce when you met him? Because if you did, you totally gained my respect.”

“Heart attack? Respect?..”

Even when Yuu first landed in this world, she didn’t remember feeling that lost.

NRC students were strange and alien. The way they spoke was harsh, tactless, and even despite the straightforward, sharp honesty their words possessed, which Yuu admired, she couldn’t comprehend why they would be so… different. Uncomfortably so.

“Don’t mind Ace’s wording,” Elias said. “He likes acting all cool and that.”

“You know I act cool because I am cool,” Ace shrugged his shoulders, grinning slyly. “In any case, who are you?”

Ace scanned Yuu as she was about to part her lips and introduce herself, but was quickly interrupted by the strict sound of clicking of the heels somewhere within the building walls, and turned to Elias who somehow managed to hear it too. Normally humans couldn’t detect sounds at that distance, but either Elias just guessed it right, or maybe… There was something else Yuu didn’t know about him.

“We must go,” he warned her, grabbing her hand as the steps were starting to sound clearer with each second. “Now.”

“Alright,” she nodded, not minding her hand being grabbed, and turned to Deuce and Grim. “Goodbye, Deuce-san, Grim-sama!”

“You managed to get something who believes you’re that good?!” Ace snorted, bursting into laughter. “Man, that’s hilarious— Wait, wha—?!”

“Down the Rabbit Hole!” Elias said, and the portal appeared before their eyes.

This time he made sure Yuu jumped first, then he followed her example. Before she stepped into the darkness, she threw one last quick glance and noticed a short figure appearing at the entrance, flashes of red hair strands glowing in the night like a hellfire, and a pair of searing gray eyes almost destroyed her with a supercilious gaze.

How strange, Yuu thought, despite the clear, pure concentration of genuine rage devouring the boy’s figure, somehow she felt sadness spreading within. But she quickly brushed it off and watched the portal closing.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

“Phew!”

Elias landed on the chair that slid right under him and smiled at the teacup joining the little dance, strong aroma of black tea filled the place as the teapot poured the liquid.

“Smells really strong,” Yuu noticed, welcoming the teacup that popped in her hands, and a piece of paper practically loomed before her. “Is that… a menu?”

“Oh, right, this day makes it your fourth time here, right?” Elias took a sip and let out a sigh full of an almost palpable exhaustion. “Starting from today, you’ll be offered tea by your choice. It seems the portal also started learning cooking, so expect some creativity in pastries.”

“How… very interesting. I’d love green tea with ginger and cloves, if that is alright.”

Teapot flew to hear, pouring the drink, and Yuu thanked it, welcoming pleasant warmth.

“Say, that was quite an experience!” Elias exclaimed.

“I’ll be frank, Elias-san,” Yuu sighed. “I experienced genuine anxiety when we first arrived at NRC, then unconcealed fear when you lost me, then I was about to burst when I encountered Grim, I thought it’s over when Deuce found me, and at last my knees went weak when I saw that you were alright.”

“I’m sorry,” he said genuinely. “But… you just can’t deny that it was fun, right?”

“That…” Yuu lowered her tired gaze and gave up, a hint of a smile blooming on her face. “That I can’t argue with. It, indeed, was really fun. Although we didn’t find Vil.”

“I promised to help,” Elias said, returning her uniform jacket she already forgot about. “And I will. We’ll find him, don’t worry.”

She only nodded in response, with Vil suddenly becoming not the very first task in the list of the tasks she needed to sort out. Thoughts tangled in her mind, every new face she saw today flashed behind her eyes, making it hard to focus on one thing at the time.

No, she must have taken some rest to think. Yuu took off the black jacket that was now covered in leaves and dust, and returned it to Elias.

“Thank you for today, Elias-san. Our venture proved to be really informative, to say at least. Although I wonder what the consequences will be, given that two people and a cat-looking creature caught us.”

“Ace’s safe,” Elias reassured her. “He’s my friend and I pretty much trust that little rascal.”

“R-rascal?!..”

“That he is,” he chuckled. “I don’t know who the boy you got acquainted with though.”

“I think his name was Deuce,” she hummed. “And I sensed no danger coming from him, so I would like to believe he is safe as well.”

“It’s settled then!” He clapped his hands. “Say, how about we discuss everything that happened to ourselves while we were apart later? I’m sorry to break it to you, but, uhm..”

“I don’t mind, since I’ve noticed how tired you too were.”

“You wound me,” he giggled gently. “I might have taken it as an insult, ya know! My energetic self doesn’t like being called tired.”

“I apologize,” Yuu lowered her head in a bow, but Elias quickly dismissed it. “

“It’s alright, you silly. As much as I’m being all lively and animated during the day, I also enjoy sleeping tightly at night. And well, it’s past midnight, and I’m not in my comfy bed. Get it?”

“I understand,” Yuu nodded. “I as well won’t say no to a good sleep.”

“Perfect~” Elias said, snapping his fingers, and Yuu saw the portal opening above her. “Ready to try leaving the portal alone?”

“Y-yes?!”

“Sorry, sorry, it will just be best if we arrive separately,” he smiled at her. “Look, if someone from the school staff finds you and me together, they will suspect I kinda made you come with me, which I did in a way, but I don’t want to troubling you. What’s the fun in being lectured by Emery and his ‘You just don’t know how persuasive Elias can be’ speeches.”

“But I’m also responsible—”

“Relax, Yuu,” he threw thumbs up again. “Or I’ll call you mom again.”

“It was a pleasant experience, thank you very much for your company, see you tomorrow.”

“Haha!!” He laughed genuinely. “You’re being so funny when you’re tired!”

“Glad to satisfy your urge for a good laugh, now, if you’ll excuse me…”

“Thank you for choosing Elias airlines. We’re looking forward to flying with you again. Have a good evening!”

“Airlines?.. Either way, yes, Elias-san, goodbye. Sleep well.”

“Bye-beee!~”

And with that Yuu jumped, leaving the portal.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

After spending almost the whole day with Elias by her side, Yuu felt how lonely it was — to not hear someone giggling and telling jokes every so often, and frowned, but was instantly interrupted as she recognized the place she landed into.

The greenhouse!

An odd joy filled her heart at the sight of a familiar tall figure appearing before her, but she quickly dismissed that delight when she realized she got caught again.

“I-Ivy-san,” she gulped. “I… uh…”

“How was your trip to NRC?”

“W-what?!”

Ivy, unlike anyone who she met today in the evening, carried an aura of serene tranquility, making her own reactions slow down, the uneasiness and hypersensitivity dying out at once, leaving a place for peace.

Flowery aroma radiating from him was very much pleasant and welcoming as she stood up with the help of his hand.

“Don’t be so surprised,” his soft, ephemeral voice rippled in the air with a thin whisper. “I am the one covering Elias’s shenanigans when needed.”

“I see…”

“Oh,” Ivy turned to Yuu, bending over. She peered into the depth of his eyes watching her own, and held her breath, striked by his empyreal beauty. “My apologies. You seem very tired. I am in no position to detain you any further.”

“No need to apologize,” Yuu shook her head lightly. “But I am very grateful for your assistance. Then, if you don’t mind, I’ll take my leave.”

“See you hopefully tomorrow, Yuu-san. Get some rest, it’s painful to see your eyes losing their brightness.”

“Yes?..” She let out a refrained breath, not entirely sure of what he meant.

“... No, nothing,” he smiled at her and averted his gaze at last, stepping into the greenhouse. “I feel like I saw eyes resembling yours somewhere…”

The last sentence died out, pronounced almost in a complete whisper, as if he wasn’t sure himself whether he wanted her to hear it at all, and entered the greenhouse. Yuu saw him taking a flowerpot with Florence in it in his hands, and decided to let it be as it is for now, taking her leave and heading out to the clock tower.

As much as she would love to sort her thoughts out, first she must sleep.

And let the new day bring her the clearance of the mind she needed so much.

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst x reader #rsa #rsa x reader #neige leblanche #vil schoenheit #ace trappola #deuce spade #riddle rosehearts #royal sword academy #nrc #night raven college

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farolero-posting · 4 months

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no but, like, Prototype is SO interesting when you think a little harder about him and I just want you to see my vision for a sec because im feeling normal. hiding this under a cut though.

I think the main line i wanna say is that yes we can easily see why Silver or The World Machine see themselves as flawed machines but I don't think that notion is too out of reach for him yknow? Like. He was built to "greet the messiah of the old world", which ended up not happening as it was supposed to. Worst part of it is that considering the lore Cedric provides, Proto was the one to figure out this quest for a savior was pointless. It's like predicting that his very existence is futile, and then just having to live with that?? Somehow?? Not only this, but the implied cultural shift that this event caused had to be considerable. People left their research, they changed their outlook in life, this action ended up changing the trajectory that people had. Hell, maybe some people took their own lives. I mean, that note in the Barrens had to be inspired by something.

Could you Fucking Imagine realizing that your actions had THIS effect? That you effectively have caused harm by sharing this knowledge, but this was either out of your scope, or it was something you were programmed to do from the start? That this is all out of your choice? What the fuck even. "OP it's not that deep" I know but it could be. Hello. I mean listen. if the Author hadn't known everything was going to end in the next few years, do you think he would've tried to create TWM?

And then, I guess. the simulation is created and as problems arise, the Author's children are tasked with a backup plan that could help them be tamed. There is no guarantee that whoever ends up with the simulation will attempt it, but they need to believe it's possible. And they all wait, and make sacrifices. Prototype not only hides in a corner that's harder to access but we find him without part of his memories, in such a way that he can't even introduce himself properly. The data is close to him, and yet body and mind and identity are kind of divisible. And there's no guarantee that his wait will amount to anything. Maybe he wouldn't even realize that, in that state though, I don't fucking know. Is it better to not know? Either way this sounds like quite the sacrifice to make, and I want that to sink in.

And sure, then the savior does show up, except the circumstances are different. This world is possible to save, this world is simpler, it's also just a simulation, and all of this is stuff he knows and has accepted. He doesn't even fulfill his purpose as he should because there's another robot taking that spot. And what he ends up doing, can be once again summarized as delivering information about things that he NEEDED to share for a greater good, and that causing a negative reaction of a magnitude that accelerates the corruption of the world, and his one chance to actually guide the savior ends up leaving them more confused, upset and doubtful that they can do anything. He tries to predict what could happen next, or at least, states he does and he is always too late. Too late to tell them of the corruption, too late to tell them that the mines will collapse, too late to react to make sure Silver and himself make it out alive. And yeah this event does make Solstice a far riskier route than intended. Did the Author and co. consider this possibility? Likely, did they THINK it would actually go that way? Probably fucking not.

It's fine, in the end. Robots can be repaired, and things did turn out okay, but the cost was still big, and no replacement can really make the consequences disappear. But time goes on, anyways. What else could you expect? What else can you do? Can you say you failed if it was out of your control? If it was never meant to be anyways? What did you make of the chance you did get?

And, in other topics, from where DO you draw your worth? What defines you? Where is "you"?

idk.

#im so sorry for the people who have notifications on for this blog. whoops. tell me to go sleep #do i even wanna maintag this... no....#can u tell it's late at night for me. unspeakably late #i know im preaching to the choir though like i dont think im saying anything unpopular lol #anyways top 3 characters i would go out for drinks if they could drink #so i could ask them WHAT THE FUCK. is up with them #prototype #analysis #proto had one fucking job and uhm. idk well. how well do u think he did it #suicide mention #kiiind of vaguely but just to be safe

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whattraintracks · 2 months

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13. Worthless - TMNT 1987

Some thoughts on Raphael, master of disguise.

There's this scene in "Raphael, Turtle of a Thousand Faces" (s05e16) that I think about a lot.

So Raphael is taking a remote class on undercover detective work, and the other turtles make fun of him practicing disguises for an assignment. Splinter checks on him after he storms off, and it's such a short conversation, but I think there's more going on under the surface.

First of all, Splinter's reaction to learning about the class is hilarious. His face is fun to watch and he's so baffled he literally gasps. But then you can tell he tries to be patient and understanding. I wish I knew what he was thinking. Is it, why would you want to be anything other than a ninja? Or maybe, you've never expressed interest in this before, where is this coming from?? If you've ever worked for a while with the same group of kids or adolescents, you may be familiar with this thought.

At first glance, Raphael's response breaks my heart. He tells Splinter he's taking this class to make "more of a contribution to the mean green team! You know, something special." My immediate thought is that he's feeling a little worthless. But then I step back and wonder if I'm reading too far into it. Taking the time to learn a new skill to better support your teammates is a worthwhile endeavor. This is not, on its own, necessarily an indicator of low self-esteem. But what bothers me is that nobody knew he was doing this. Again, not explicitly a bad thing, but it seems weird to me that he wouldn't involve the other turtles or at least let them know about it so they can support him.

So Splinter, of course, immediately reassures him they're all special. Also not sure what to make of how he says this because it sounds some combination of fond and amused but also just conciliatory. What's interesting is what Raphael says next, and how he says it causes me to question that initial assumption again. He agrees, almost genuinely? Like he says "maybe" but not in a "yeah, I guess" choosing-not-to-argue-but-feeling-otherwise kind of way, he sounds sincere. Now, this could be him saying, well, duh, we're special, how many other crime-fighting turtle men do you know? This would line up with stuff he's expressed throughout the series. But he finishes very showy and cheerfully with, "But I'll be the only master of disguise!" So maybe that first impression was wrong. Maybe this is just a teenager branching out and discovering other interests. Maybe the secrecy was because he was worried the guys would make fun of him—which they did. Or maybe, he wants to distinguish himself from the other turtles, wants his own thing.

And I wonder why he might feel like he needs his own thing or specialty. One of my favorite parts about the team dynamic in this series is that they don't really have designated roles. Leonardo is the leader in that he keeps them rallied and on task, but they all take turns offering plans and solutions, serving as the distraction, playing bait, or, more practically, just driving or flying. But since Leonardo has a defined role as the leader/master ninja, Donatello as the inventor/the one who gets them out of trouble (see one of my favorite Raphael lines at the end of "My Brother, the Bad Guy"), and even Michelangelo as the chef/pizza guy, maybe he's feeling some anxiety over his own ambiguous role.

But I can't get rid of the feeling that he thinks he's not enough and the others are brushing it off. Especially after their weak apologies—"We didn't know you were actually serious about this disguise thing." Especially as he tries so hard to prove his dedication and skill and ends up in a lot of trouble in the rest of this episode. Especially when he gives up private investigation but immediately throws himself into chemistry at the end of the episode, once again on his own and without help.

This happens in one episode, and as far as I remember, they never talk about it again, but he's my little guy, and I worry, okay! I just want him to be happy and know he's loved and valued.

#march for raph #he is my little guy #and sometimes he makes me sad #because i love him so much #raphael turtle of a thousand faces #tmnt 1987 #tmnt #whattrainofthought

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littlestsnicket · 2 months

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TIL that photographing journal pages is a lot harder than i suspected and the lighting at my office is particularly garbage for it.

anyway, i was talking to @kuwdora about trying to harness all of the productivity skills one picks up to put processes in place to allow yourself to be more creative, so i made a commitment to experiment with using my scrum master skills into making it easier to finish this fic.

the first task was to decide on a backlog management tool. my primary concerns were portability and that i like tactile things, so i went back to basics and decided against using a backlog management tool at all. so now my backlog lives in my bullet journal.

more scrum related rambling under the cut:

in my professional opinion, the point of scrum is to make (and deliver on) clearly defined commitments. i’m still working through how much commitment making i want to do, because writing is a hobby and i don’t want it to feel like a job, but it’s also a hobby that i want to get better at and make easier for myself to still do when i’m tried or have decision paralysis or whatever else stops me from writing. we’ll see how it goes.

if nothing else, just going through the exercise of making a backlog was helpful. since i usually write such short things, i don’t have a lot of coping mechanisms for dealing with a 35 page google doc and the start at the beginning and hope you get to an interesting note or piece of beta reading feedback was getting daunting and unproductive.

now that i have provided some introduction, i’ll move on to an abbreviated team charter, since team is just me (and maybe @soymimikyu, my beta reader, but mostly just me).

mission statement: discover and use effective processes to write more and finish the fucking fic!

scrum rituals:

sprint: i’m going to try single week sprints starting/ending on wednesdays. i think making smaller commitments for a shorter period of time is going to work better for me, but i can come back to this if i change my mind.

daily standup: i was initially thinking, no i’m not doing that, but i’m going make a commitment to look at the sprint board at least once a day

refining: i don’t think i need dedicated time for this. if i try using scrum for something that has more undefined scope this might be useful, but i don’t expect that i will add anything to the backlog (just break down some of the stuff under needs refining into smaller pieces)

retro: i do want to set aside some time on wednesdays to reflect and see if this is working from a process perspective

review/planning: usually those don’t really go together, but i think they should. this gets glossed over a lot in practice (in my experience) but the purpose of a sprint review is to update the backlog based on stakeholder feedback, and given the lack of stakeholders outside of myself and my beta reader, update the backlog and make a new commitment for next sprint do naturally go together.

we can skip the conflict resolution bit too. (conflict resolution is that it’s my fic and soymimiku’s opinions about parentheticals are silly.)

i think that’s enough defining to get started. i’m a huge process nerd so i’m kind of excited about this. we’ll see if it works!

#mayo writes with scrum #going to try and use a consistent tag so i can make public commitments depending on how this goes

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palant1r · 1 year

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Between light and mikami, who would u say is worse

ooo interesting question! "worst" is a metric with such a wide variety of interpretations, so i'm gonna put forward a few definitions...

Least fun to hang out with at a party: Mikami, no doubt. He's the most boring person alive. Light is a charismatic person who's very good at acting personable and feigning interest in others, so I feel like he'd be a pretty fun acquaintance to have, even if he never lets anyone beneath the surface

Least fun to actually be close friends with, at least for me: Light. It would be like being friends with an incredibly sophisticated chatbot — all the right responses, but you can't get a peek at what actually makes him tick without a 400 IQ and 3 separate terminal degrees, plus years of hannibal-level psychoanalysis. But I could be friends with Mikami. I'm actually a bit of a law nerd — the kind of person who got tickets to a conference about public document requests for fun — so while we wouldn't be able to make small talk, I feel like once we got to know each other we could have some autistic ass conversations about court precedent. Also I could use a gym buddy.

Most net negative impact on the world: I mean, Light, obviously

Most pleasure taken in atrocities: Light. Mikami doesn't actually seem to take much personal pleasure in killing beyond his worship of Kira. Light, meanwhile, despite his self-justification of just wanting to make a good world, looooves to vindictively gloat over victims, even those that aren't those he thinks of as "criminals." See: L, Raye Penber, Near

Least coherent moral code: Mikami. His moral code is just like. Some religion he duct taped together out of a bunch of coincidences and terminal cop brain, plus a heavy dose of inexplicable cultural christianity despite not being culturally christian. Which makes it all the more baffling that he's apparently able to hold coherent conversations about politics. Light's own situation may be a middle schooler's first introduction to deontology and consequentalism, but at least it's something

Most aggravating moral code: Light. Man, I fucking hate the way this guy thinks about the world, because it's eerily similar to shit I see IRL. It's the idea of a moral code that exists fully to justify oneself as Good, cruelty justified through hatred of a so-called "evil," assuming that bad people are an ontological class that can be eliminated with no consequences and society will improve as a result. There are people who deadass believe this shit. I've compared Light tongue-in-cheek to Republicans in a fic before, but honestly I see it in leftist spaces all the time — just replace "criminals" with "billionaires." Hating the "bad people" and wanting them gone is such a convenient way for people to deny systemic injustice and their own role in it. And of course, as long as one defines oneself as "good," one gives themself free rein to eliminate opposition with righteous vindication. It's a mindset that's not unique to Light Yagami, he's just unique in the power he wields to enact it. It's the reason that, while as a Light Yagami Enjoyer I would never judge someone for loving Light Yagami, I tend to side-eye the side of the fandom that unironically argues Kira was right. I need to cut myself off before I go on my full anti-Kira rant...

Worst in bed: I'm not entirely confident Mikami knows what sex is.

Worst at being Kira: Light, by default — it was his own damn fault they lost, though he tried to blame Mikami. Hell, if he hadn't insisted on gloating in the warehouse, he might even have talked his way out of that situation. After all, it made sense for him to be the owner — someone in the task force had to be, and I'm pretty sure it's actually a plot hole that Mikami could see Aizawa's name. It wouldn't have convinced the SPK and Aizawa, but it would have given Ide and Mogi hesitation and Matsuda would certainly have been convinced. "But Mikami should have checked the notebook again before coming to the warehouse and it's stupid that he didn't—" HE WAS BEING CONTROLLED OK I 100% THINK MATSUDA IS RIGHT ABOUT THIS because otherwise both near and mikami's characters are assassinated in the final chapter more brutally than JFK and i do have a bit of respect for O&O as writers lmao. Mikami played his part perfectly. If he'd been the one to find the first notebook, I think he would have lasted longer than Light, simply because he wouldn't decide to do all the galaxy brain plays to get close to L.

#death note #ask #light yagami #teru mikami

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troutfur · 6 months

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Twigkit and Violetkit trying to cope with being apart in the days after they're first seperated

And here we go for my last pick of the original batch!

Now AVoS is admittedly one arc I do not have much fondness for or recollection of. BUT! I did say I read the first half of it and this is one of the precious few female-character centric prompts. Not to mention one of my oldest. Plus the fact Twig and Violet are so young gives me a lot of leeway characterization-wise. So, sure, let's give it a spin!

Violet was my choice PoV here. Let's see where this leads us.

(Want to submit a prompt? Check my guidelines and send 'em in! I am going to soon purge the inbox of submissions made before yesterday so I need plenty to last me the last 15 days of the month.)

That defining day was but a blurr in Violetshine’s memory. The mass of unfamiliar cats with their mingling scents surrounding her and her sister. The shouts as the leaders argued while projecting their thunderous voices across the whole of the island. The utter refusal to the move, her pinlike claws trying desperately to keep ahold of the ground as she was picked up by the scruff. The hoarseness of her tiny throat as she mewled in protest. The images had faded, it was not like they had ever been that clear to begin really, but the sensations and the emotions, it was all etched deep into her mind.

But much as the event in itself was ever fuzzy, not so much from age, she could remember much more vividly all that had come after as she was carried from the island through the moors and through the forest where her home had been the last couple of days into that damp, musty, overcast territory, into that place where the full moon could barely glimmer. Looking back, Violetshine wondered if such a first impression would have always made the place not feel at all like home, if had the Clan that brought her up been kinder she would have still ended up wanting to leave.

Then again the hostility had also been something that she had felt from her very first impression...

A growl rose in Pebbleshine’s throat just as Rowanclaw tried to deposit Violetkit alongside her own litter. “What are you doing!” she demanded, not really even a hint of a question in her voice. “How do you come back with a kitten of all things?!”

Her soon-to-be littermates were agitated at that, stuck between curiosity at the new bundle being brought to their nest and an immediate rejection at the foreign smell that clung to her. In emulation of their mother they also took on a defensive attitude, recoiling but sticking out their pelts while pawing at her. Their diminutive claws were out, not a body part they could really control yet but still very much out.

They were older than her. Not by much but enough to make their difference in size noticeable and the outsider kitten stick out all the more like a twisted claw.

Of the words exchanged between Rowanstar and the black-furred queen Violetkit had only caught glimpses, all the while recoiling from the Clanborn kits trying to defend their territory. “ThunderClan”, “prophecy”, “fair”, and “our right”. But there was also “Clanborn”, “crowded”, “distract”, and “their right”.

The only mind the affair between the kittens was being paid was by the ocassional interruption by their attempt to grasp at Violetkit by a swipe of their mother’s tail.

“Fine,” Rowanstar finally agreed. “She’ll sleep with me until your kittens are properly accustomed to her. But I’m going to expect that you put of your part to make this happen. I won’t be able to keep her with me forever.”

“And I will,” Pinenose replied. “Oh you believe me I will.” She turned towards her kittens once again and swept them off just as they were beginning to get rauccous once again. “But not now. Least you could’ve done was make sure I was not trying to rest before springing a task upon me.”

With that, Violetkit was brought alongside Rowanstar’s mate to rest in the leader’s den. She nestled on the gap just under Tawnypelt’s chin.

It wasn’t a particularly restful night from there. Not even from the attempt at licks of comfort.

#warrior cats #wc #violetshine #tawnypelt #rowanclaw #rowanstar #pinenose #hmmmm definitely needs more work #over the last few days I've been very very fascinated about the contrast between the many pieces were I think ''hmmmm not it''#and the ones which in my hubris I think ''yeah practically ready to post''#even if I know sleeping on something ALWAYS changes my opinion on a piece

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shivunin · 1 year

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From the Depths

(for the prompt "A kiss after receiving good news" from @zenstrike---thanks again!!)

Arianwen could not imagine a city worse than Orzammar.

It wasn’t just the ugliness of the politics; it wasn’t just the deprivation of fresh air and sunlight. It wasn’t the annoyance of the tasks she’d been set to, or even her leg wound. It was all of these at once, and more.

For example, even if she tried her hardest she could not make a throwing blade stick in anything when all the furniture was made of stone…and there was little else to occupy her time at the moment, when she’d had no visitors all day. Even the healer wouldn’t return until the results of the most recent examination.

“Worst city in Thedas,” she muttered to herself, lying on her back in the stone bed. A stone bed—as if sleeping on stone was some kind of luxury. At least in the alienage she’d had an actual mattress.

She hated Orzammar.

Her knife flipped into the air, the edge of the blade shining in the lamplight, and she caught it easily when it fell again. She’d been very firmly warned not to climb out of bed after she’d fallen two days ago, and Alistair had been so genuinely frustrated that she’d begrudgingly agreed to stay put.

Flip. Catch. Flip. Catch.

They could have at least brought in a practice dummy. That was the minimum—she’d made the idiot into a king, hadn’t she? Surely he could manage this one thing. She’d defeated a legend, a hostile wasteland full of traps designed to kill her, and she’d certainly paid for it. Was one stupid target so hard?

Flip. Catch. Flip. Catch.

Alright, well, obviously there would be a problem with retrieving the knives even if they did bring a target in here. But someone could have stayed with her and brought them back. Really, it was odd that none of them had. Not one. She was just…lying here by herself.

Flip. Catch. Flip. Catch.

So, fine, it wasn’t just that she’d driven them all off with her ill temper. It was that one of them specifically hadn’t stuck around. She was grown enough to admit that much to herself, if not aloud.

Flip. Catch. Flip. Catch.

But why should it bother her? They’d made no promises to each other, had they? She’d never told Zevran she wanted more than company, and he’d never implied otherwise. In fact, he’d more or less let her define what they were to each other thus far, hadn’t he? Like he didn’t want to admit anything either way—or maybe he just didn’t care enough to choose.

Flip. Catch.

When Arianwen caught her blade next, she let it rest against her chest instead of throwing it again. The handle was cool from the air—it was always just a little too cool for comfort here, but never actually cold. All the stone held on to the chill, she supposed. The choking heat at the Anvil had almost been a boon after weeks of the creeping chill. Now, Wen held tight to her knife until the handle warmed against her skin, as a child cuddles a stuffed toy.

After the fever…she could have sworn she remembered Zevran there. She certainly remembered a lovely pair of eyes, a brown nearing gold, holding hers to the light when she would have fallen away. Even in her haze, she’d known that had to mean something. But…

They’d let her up long enough to end the fighting in the Assembly. Directly after, she’d been dragged back to this room to languish on her sickbed until the infection had been purged entirely. So, here she was a week later: still in bed while the Blight raged on the surface.

Alone.

He…hadn’t chosen to stick around.

As she thought this, the door on the far wall swung open. Wen sat up, spinning the blade into a throwing position just in case. There was no need; she recognized the cadence of the footsteps even before her lover came into view.

“Oh,” she said, and flopped back onto the bed, “Hello.”

“Good evening, my dear Warden,” Zevran said, and sat on the bed beside her, “I have the most intriguing news for you.”

“Oh?” she said, and tossed her throwing knife into the air again, “Is Bhelen going to bring me a practice target finally? Or have they discovered a chef who can actually cook?”

“Ah, even better,” Zevran said, smiling down at her in a way that made her stomach flip, “We are leaving within the hour. You have been cleared to leave.”

“What?” Wen said, snatching her throwing blade from the air and sitting up in a rush, “This isn’t some joke, is it?”

“Mi vida, would I joke with you about something so dire?” Zevran said, setting a hand on his chest in false offense, “No, it is not a jo—”

She was kissing him before she decided to do it—awkwardly, with their noses pressed against each other and his teeth far too involved in the matter. Arianwen didn’t care—to leave this dreadful place; perhaps to never return! She couldn’t imagine better news in the world right now, unless he’d also come to tell her that Loghain had decided to do them all a favor and drop dead somewhere.

Perhaps that—a messy kiss, too hard and misplaced—might have been all of it if she’d pulled away right then. But Zevran’s hand caught the back of her neck before Arianwen could swing her legs over the side of the bed.

Something…changed then, though she couldn’t quite put words to it until later. They hadn’t kissed since she’d gone into the Deep Roads weeks before; between visits from the healer and everything else, they hadn’t been alone together since she’d returned.

Over the past months, they’d kissed plenty. Quick ones, checking on each other after battle; long, languorous ones in his tent or hers, as a prelude to lovemaking; laughing ones, when she kissed him to stop his joking, and even angry ones when one or the other of them had taken an unnecessary risk in combat (why he insisted on guarding her was beyond Arianwen; not that her irritation ever dissuaded him).

Zevran had never kissed her like this—like he was finding her and losing her all at once. It was a kiss that felt like a farewell; it was a kiss that felt like finding something precious and small and cradling it in one’s hands. No; he’d never, ever kissed her quite like this. Arianwen was certain that she would have remembered it if he had.

“What’s wrong?” she asked as soon as he let go, and caught his hand in hers when he would have stood, “What’s happened?”

“Wrong? Nothing is wrong, my dear Warden” Zevran said with an arched brow, but he turned away too quickly for her to read his expression, “Come—I had thought you would not wish to stay in this room a moment longer. You certainly said so enough times, yes?”

Wen peered at his back as he began to shove her things back into her pack.

“But perhaps I was mistaken,” he added after a moment, glancing at her over his shoulder, “I could always tell the others you wish to stay if—”

“No!” Wen said at once, and swung her legs off the bed. Her wounded leg gave an uncomfortable twinge when she put weight on it, but she ignored that. Let it hurt all it wanted to, so long as it hurt under the sky.

“No,” she said again, “I’m well. I’m ready. Let me get my armor and we can go.”

Packing and readying herself to leave was busy. Collecting her assurances from the king and making the appropriate goodbyes was time consuming, too, and almost tiring enough for Arianwen to ask for more rest.

None of it was quite busy enough to make her forget the way Zevran had tasted on her lips.

Like…tenderness.

Tenderness and desperation.

But why?

#arianwen tabris #zevran arainai #zevwarden #zevran x tabris #zevran x warden #dao #zevwen #they're soooo close to realizing #give them a few weeks and they'll get there

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offbranddrpepsi · 2 years

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heyo!! can i ask a scenario where the reader is short and always covered so others think they’re kinda weak but it gets revealed they’re like buff and have their arms covered in tattoos?? i hope this isn’t too much 😭😭 with phoenix,yoru and chamber

Y'all all really flooded my ask box the moment the birthday scenario dropped lmfao. I am more than happy with this and actually enjoy this trope a lot so no worries! Onto the stuffs!

Phoenix ALWAYS ragged on you about being so small. He constantly picked on you about needing help during missions despite never actually being on the same team as you. He was in for the shock of a lifetime when you finally took off your hoodie to reveal what was underneath. You and Jett had decided to have a no powers race, you taking off the hoodie to make it easier for you to sprint. Phoenix's jaw nearly hit the floor when he saw you not only out running Jett but also covered in tattoos and well defined muscles. As soon as he could he started pestering you about all your ink as well as asking you how much you could lift. If you took the time to pay attention you would have seen a dusting of pink on his cheeks as he checked you over. He certainly took every opportunity to see you without your hoodie and even pushed to be on missions with you to see you in battle. He finds the whole look absurdly attractive.

Jesus Yoru is the cockiest agent and probably would have given you the most shit over being weak. It started getting so bad you felt like you were being practically bullied by the man. So, in an act of pure frustration you pulled off your sweat shirt and asked him to spare right on the spot. To say he was shocked is an understatement. He stared at you so long Skye had to ask if he was okay because he hadn't answered you or well, breathed in a solid minute. Tried to act unphased but lost the fight badly much to your amusement and joy, walked away with his head hanging low without a word. Didn't speak to you for nearly two weeks, you half thought you did something wrong until he showed up at your dorm asking if you wanted to head out with him. Starts asking about your tattoos, listening attentively to the stories they hold. Without a thought ends up stroking one of the tattoos and gets incredibly flustered when he realizes and for once in his life apologizes. Started treating you fairly nice after everything and even has you help him pick out more tattoos for himself. Skye keeps joking you beat some sense into him when actually you may have beat other feelings into him instead.

The gentleman constantly offered to help you with tasks from getting things off of high shelves to carrying things around for you. He did it far more often than he did for the other short agents so you were curious what made you different. Deciding to ask one day was a big mistake as he simply went: "You are so petite I imagine you would have trouble with anything.", that set you off. For the next week you wore sleeveless shirts, tank tops, and even crop tops in the hopes of passing by Chamber and flaunting what you worked hard for. That day came directly before a mission when you were getting your equipment and had scaled a weapon wrack to avoid asking for help. Turning around you were met with wide hazel eyes and an expression that looked like someone had just slapped him. You asked what was wrong to which he stuttered out a 'N-nothing' before fixing his tie and walking off to the Vulture. He didn't say anything but started randomly asking you to carry or hand him heavy objects, eyes very clearly lingering on you before thanking you. It was a good feeling that you were endlessly smug about to say the least.

#chamber x reader #chamber valorant #valorant x reader #valorant #yoru x reader #yoru valorant #phoenix valorant #phoenix x reader #scenario

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wandaluvstacos · 5 months

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Chapter 37 of Good Investment is now up on my Patreon!

Good Investment is available at the $5/month tier. People who pledge $5 a month have access to not only Good Investment but The Sponsors series (ongoing), Pretty Things (complete), May the Blood Run Pure (complete), and Kept Man (complete), along with the $1/month tier books, the Reflections trilogy (ongoing) and The Halfwife (ongoing).

Adri Schvaneveldt has always felt split between two worlds. In one world, they are the adopted child of a large and conservative Mormon family. In another, she is the CEO of a burgeoning fashion empire that pushes boundaries. But in order to be the latter, Adri first has to find the funding. After gaining a hefty following as a social media influencer/model, Adri has the potential customers– if they can get a reliable production model pounded out. And that means a bit of groveling at the feet of investors, most of who have never even heard the term “non-binary”.

But Adri lucks out with Gideon Snow, whose youth and open mind bring much needed funds to make Adri’s dream of diverse, accessible fashion a reality. Of course, lifting a newborn company to its feet is no small task, and late nights drive Adri to occasional stays at Gideon’s nearby house, where their relationship begins stretching beyond business. Adri knows they can’t put an entire business venture at risk for the turbulent whims of their heart. But reason doesn’t always win out.

Excerpt:

Adri crossed the space between them and took his head in their hands, planting a kiss on his forehead before pulling back to ask, “How invested are you in being straight?” “Invested?” Gideon’s brows wrinkled. “It’s not about investment, it’s just how I am.”

“I think you’re invested in it,” Adri replied gently. “But I think that instead of trying to deal with the dissonance of being straight and also being in love with me, maybe you decide you are what you are. Maybe you’re a little queer. Would that be so bad?”

Gideon blinked at Adri for a second like they were speaking tongues. Was it truly something he’d never considered? “I’m not attracted to men. Like, at all.”

“You don’t have to be attracted to men to be a little queer. I’m not a man. But I’m not a woman either.”

“I’d say you lean much more heavily on the woman side though.”

Adri snorted, dropping their hands to Gideon’s shoulders. “I’m not ninety percent woman and ten percent man. I’m neither. I’m a secret, third thing.”

Gideon chuckled. “Yeah, okay. A secret, third thing that wears make-up and heels and acrylic nails.”

“Is that what you’re attracted to?”

“I mean…” Gideon’s eyes darted down to Adri’s feet before returning to their gaze. “Kind of. Not all of it. Some of it, for sure.”

“Is that the only thing you’re attracted to? My feminine traits?” “Well, no, but—”

“I thought I was a woman for a few years, and I tried so hard to keep myself in that box because I knew it’d be easier. Obviously it was harder than being a cis man, but with hormones and all that, at least I could attempt passing. But the more I thought about it the more I realized I was putting myself in a box for other people’s benefit more than my own. Being nonbinary didn’t mean I didn’t have an identity or a gender, it just meant defining the boundaries was a pointless exercise. I didn’t care about the definitions or the limits imposed upon me. I only wanted to be me. I think we should see sexuality much of the same way. We all like what we like, and if we don’t feel pressured to define it, then we would all feel much more free.”

“That’s what my uncle would call hippy-dippy.”

Adri chuckled. “Maybe. But it’s my truth.”

Gideon leaned forward, his forehead resting on Adri’s collarbone as his arms slipped around them. “I get what you’re saying, but I’m afraid to say that the world out there doesn’t see things the way you do.”

“Who cares? It’s no one else’s business.”

“People will make it their business.”

Adri ran their fingers through Gideon’s hair. “I know.”

“I’m not really ready to give up on being straight.”

Adri smiled. “I’m not going to pressure you into anything. I’m just saying you should think about it.”

#Good Investment #my writing #excerpt #Patreon #update #original fiction #lgbtq romance

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sneakers-and-shakes · 2 years

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Romanticize Your Life Challenge

This past week I challenged myself to romanticize my life every single day. From previous experience, I knew it was unrealistic to expect every moment to feel like that, so my goal was to have one defined moment/activity during which I fully embrace the main character role in a romance movie.

It’s something I try to do at least once or twice a week since it’s a grounding moment in my day. To romanticize something, you need to be very present in the moment.

In a way it forces you to pause and reflect upon what you’re doing and make it the best thing ever (in your head at least).

It’s difficult to write a blog post on it so I’ll lead by example and share with you the log I kept of how each day went and what I did. (Hopefully this gives you some ideas!)

-.-

Monday:

This morning, after going through most of my morning routine, I sat and scrapbooked. Scrapbooking is always fun and relaxing for me, so it was an easy thing to romanticize. The fact that I had a day off work helped as well since I was able to go through my tasks in a relaxed and peaceful manner which made everything feel much more deliberate.

Tuesday:

For some reason wearing heels always makes me feel powerful and like the main character in a movie, so I tried to embody that energy when I went into work today in heels. But then that moment was surpassed since I ended up getting dinner with a friend afterwards. It was a small little rooftop with a really pretty view of the sunset and string lights that came on once it got dark. I got a healthy taco salad which made me feel even better. Another relatively easy day for the challenge.

Wednesday:

Of course, it would get harder after two days of easy wins *sigh* Today just kinda slipped by with nothing conveniently aesthetic happening around me. I also almost forgot about the challenge and remembered at night that I needed to do something that made me feel like I was romanticizing my life. I guess this is just proof that it doesn’t take that much. At the time I was just about to start reading a story, so I took a second to ground myself in the present. (Which mostly meant be aware an intentional about my actions). And then I got cozy with a blanket in bed and decided I was going to read this cute story and it’d be a nice time and make me happy. So that was my moment for today.

Thursday:

I was really tired and sleep-deprived today. (I ended up staying way too late reading) So it was kinda hard to get the motivation to actually make an activity cute and something more than what it was. But since I had to do my nails, I decided to make that my moment. I put on some of my favorite music (BTS) and instead of rushing through it, took my time and even did a design. It wasn’t much since I was tired and not feeling up to it, but I tried to make the most of it and did end up with a really nice moment during one of the songs.

Friday:

I guess after two hard ones, I got a break today. I had plans to get dinner and go to a bookstore, so it was pretty easy to romanticize my evening. I was able to really soak in that main character feeling and it was a nice night. If I had to really pick a moment, I’d say it was when I was perusing the books at the bookstore and running my fingers across the spines, it felt like something out of a tv-show.

Saturday:

Today was the most intentional day of the challenge. (I guess it took five days of practice) There were actually three distinct moments today. One easy one I do often was simply play music during my shower. Except this time I knew the coreo to the song so I was able to actually dance along to it. (The song is Mic Drop by BTS). So that brought up my spirits immediately. I also got Dunkin on my drive and rolled the windows down, blasting my music. (Also BTS, I’m sure you’re sensing a theme). It was very pixie dream girl vibes. And the last one, another easy one, was I bought myself some nice pens in all these cute colors and wrote in my notebook with all the colors of the rainbow. The sun was streaming down on the page and I sat at my desk instead of my bed for once. It felt really good. Today feels like the most accomplished day of this challenge.

Sunday:

It was a cold, rainy day and I didn’t feel like doing anything at all. Of course, that didn’t mean I didn’t have anything to do, I just kept putting my list off. So finally, towards the end of the day, my “romanticize my life” moment came. I chose to ignore my list (nothing was that important anyway), light a candle, turn off the lights, and pull my blankets around me. It was a truly freeing moment to decide to just relax and spend the rest of my night the way I want. (Watching Youtube videos and reading). This moment might be more about self-care but sometimes that is the most romantic thing you can do for yourself.

-.-

As expected, some days were easy, others more difficult, but overall, I’d say I really enjoyed this challenge. I mean why wouldn’t you want to feel better about your life and the things you do?

It’s definitely something that relies on practice. The more often you do it, the easier it is do and you find yourself drawn to those moments. Mostly though, I think it’s about being present in the moment, and adding some intention behind your actions.

We do so many things out of habit or without really thinking about it. This challenge forces you to be deliberate with your actions.

Of course you can’t do that with everything, but finding one activity or moment in your day makes you feel more grounded. I highly recommend this challenge to you dear reader!

Please let me know how it goes for you!

See you in the next one!

#romanticize your life #challenge #lifestyle #lifestyle blog

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