#and then i did learn the basics and then it started to get complicated and i was lost and then our task was like

[hiking-the-alpines]

Okay. This post is gonna be about Bart Allen, and all the Thawne-Allen stuff.

Tagged bc we both love Bart’s Thawne Allen problem: @themaybewoman

This is what I’ve gathered so far about his existence is hopefully comic accurate, but maybe not continuity accurate:

It starts with Iris West. Apparently, it’s recently revealed to me (today) that this girl is actually from the 31st century. Because of the semi-dystopian era of her birth, her real parents sent her back in time to the 21st century to keep her safe. She was adopted by the Wests, but she doesn’t know her future origins until later on.

She meets Barry as a news reporter, and they marry. When they were thinking about having kids, Reverse Flash/Eobard Thawne comes along and murders her because his likes to make Barry’s life as miserable as possible. But because she’s from the future, her parents found some magic comic book science to “revive” her, thus placing her in the 31st century to live her life.

Barry finds out she’s alive in the future, and basically goes into retirement to live with her in the 31st century. He passes the mantle of The Flash to Wally West. Why he doesn’t just get her and bring her back to the 21st century, I’ll never know. Or he just wanted her to be with her real parents (which i would assume she barely knows lol).

I was trying so hard to find out why Barry decided to raise their children in the 31st century, but we have our answer there. Iris is future girl. Their children, Don and Dawn Allen, later operates as the Tornado Twins much like Barry did as the Flash. In Central City, I’m assuming. There was some clashing with the Legion of Superheroes, basically the 31st century’s version of the Justice League, but whatever. Not really important to Bart’s existence.

Dawn Allen marries Jeven Ognats. They have a daughter named Jenni Ognats, who later joins the Legion of Superheroes as XS. Jenni is Bart’s cousin.

Don Allen marries Meloni Thawne, and that’s where this gets more complicated.

Meloni Thawne is the daughter of Earthgov President Thaddeus Thawne, who irrc is a direct descendant of Eobard Thawne. When President Thawne learned of this marriage, the dude’s pissed because the Thawne-Allen feud is still on in his mind. He disowns his daughter, indirectly has the Tornado Twins killed via Dominators, and then kidnaps Bart.

Idk where Barry is in all this, maybe he went into the Speedforce and just chilled there through all this?

Now Bart had this hyper-accelerated aging thing going on as a side effect of being born a speedster (I think). Like nearly a teen by two yrs I think. Thawne grandfather stuck him in this VR so he can grow up “normally”, intending to make him a living weapon against the Flashfam. I’m pretty sure Meloni was locked up or something during that period of time too? Otherwise she would’ve done something about this.

Iris kidnaps Bart, and takes him to the 21st century via the Flash Museum’s Cosmic Treadmill (how they used that idk), hoping that Bart would have Wally West as a mentor. Instead, Wally ditches him to Max Mercury to be trained, and it plays on his low self esteem. Wally was pretty mean to him at some times, like when he gets recruited for the Teen Titans as Kid Flash.

But, hey, Wally did run him around the world fast enough to fix his accelerated aging problem.

Anyways, he gets some visits from his other cousin, Jenni, and his mom in the Impulse 1995 series, which was so fun to read. It was so cool to read them talking to each other in Interlac he Max being all confused.

This all makes me wonder: was Meloni ever Don’s lightning rod? As to Iris is Barry’s lightning rod?

#POV: you marry the daughter of the man who rlly hates you #POV: you suddenly find you’re actually from the future and then die and then get revived there #dc #dc comics #the flash #barry allen #bart allen #impulse #dc universe #kid flash #young justice #Wally west #someone correct me if I’m wrong about any of this #I was just trying to figure out why tf the tornado twins were being raised in the 31st century #POV: you’re the grandson of two rival families and they fight over you #speedforce #speedsters

[tchaikovskym]

Man this day sucked balls

#i had to get up at 5:45am #that was the first worst sign #it was well until i went home for my zoom lesson #since i was like the main coordinator for one big event which had multiple small events #my boss called me and was like hey where is the portable ultrasound for the event #and she found it but the charger was missing #so i asked people responsible for the smaller events who used that ultrasound if they know anything and they were like nope #and one even managed to throw shade on me bc it has been like 2 weeks since the event #after my zoom lesson i cried abt that stupid charger #but i was like hold up i have 20 minutes only to cry bc i have my next lesson in person and i have to go #and then i went and i managed to forget abt that stupid lost charger #and i was like yay i will learn python #and then i did learn the basics and then it started to get complicated and i was lost and then our task was like #hell #and then i tried to make something at least of my task. to like define functions and stuff #and it wasnt possible #and then our teacher kind of wrote the script for the 1st part of the assignment #and i was like okay #and i tried it and the int thing didnt work it was like no you cant put it there where your teacher put it #and i was like fuck then #i just learned how to write a if else and now i have to make two different triangle area scripts baded on input and so that it would work #for non existing triangles #and like what does it mean a triangle with 4 3 and 9 as edge lengths #what do you want from me? an error output? triangle does not exist? what? #either way im fucked #i have to wake up just as early tomorrow #and i have to do a lecture for schoolkids on saturday and my ppt is not finished #and its not like ill have time tomorrow bc i work from 7am to 9pm bc im maybe a masochist #which means even less sleep #i think i have so much going on i want to just. scream.

[joycrispy]

I wanna talk about The Angel Who Would Be Crowley.

Because I had a certain set of expectations, which got thoroughly trashed in the first five minutes of S2, and my genuine response is, "Oh, fuck, yup. You're right. That's WAY better."

Looking around at GO fandom, I'm not alone in this. So let's talk about it.

Basically, a lot of people (myself included) believed that he was a high-ranking angel, and therefore as chilly and remote as every other powerful angel we'd seen at that point. We pictured Crowley-To-Be as long-haired, regal and imposing --and the fanart at the time reflected this. I'd link some if Tumblr didn't hate links.

Something like this:

We were collectively drawing on a few things --mostly, Crawly's appearance and general bearing in the Biblical scenes of S1--

--But also scattered hints of his importance, backed up by conspicuous absences in Heaven and a few profound displays of power. That's all better covered elsewhere, so I won't reiterate the arguments here. All I'm saying is: I think our headcanons were justified.

But it turns out he was this:

!!!

With his curly little--!!

And his neat white--!!

IT TURNS OUT, he was an angel who squeaked and squealed when he was happy; who flailed his arms around and made explosion noises with his mouth to explain nebulas; who preened when told his stars were pretty. Furfur, who knew him before the Fall, says:

"You used to jump on me back, little monkey in a waistcoat..."

(The use of a diminutive there, 'little'...oh, that fascinates me.)

In a pretty huge subversion of expectations, we're given these glimpses of an angel who was sweet, and joyful, and heart-meltingly silly.

In sum...an innocent.

(Perhaps innocent to a troubling degree.

We see how he troubles Aziraphale, during their first conversation. He starts looking around and behind them, checking to make sure that no one can HEAR the blithe and reckless things coming out of this angel's mouth. This angel who talks like he's never been reprimanded in his life; like it's never occurred to him that anyone would want to hurt him.

Before the Beginning, Aziraphale understood Heaven better than he did. The danger is plainly occurring to Aziraphale.)

So now, we the viewers are in on a cruel joke that Aziraphale has known all along, which is that this --THIS-- is the angel who--

*checks notes*

--did a million lightyear freestyle dive into a boiling pool of sulphur. For asking questions.

...Imagine you are Aziraphale, and everything inside you wants to believe Heaven are the Good Guys, and God is Good and Everything She does is capital-R Right...and now try to reconcile that. Keep trying. I don't think he ever totally managed it in 6000 years.

All this gets further complicated when we learn that, despite all of the above, we were still right. That sweet excitable babby up there?

He WAS a powerful and high-ranking angel.

That much is explicitly confirmed, with significant evidence that he could have been among the mightiest of archangels...

...Who apparently accosted his fellow angels for piggyback rides. And was remembered millennia later by those (now fallen) angels as something 'little.'

What does that tell us about who he was? Is?

Hell, Aziraphale has known to be wary of the archangels (and the judgements of Heaven in general) since before the Fall even happened. He chooses to believe they are Good; he can't fool himself into thinking they are Safe.

Yet he's absolutely certain that Crowley won't hurt Job's children. Enough to stand in a burning building and say to them, "I can't save you, but don't be afraid. I won't need to."

And what reason does he give?

("I know you."

"You do not know me."

"I know the angel you were.")

What does that tell us about who he was? Is?

("The angel you knew is not me."

But how is Aziraphale supposed to believe that, when he can see him all the time?)

tl;dr --yes, this is better. I love the tragedy of it.

'Innocence died screaming' and all that.

#good omens #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #Crowley #Aziraphale #good omens 2 #good omens meta

[greatshell-rider]

queen hatahra: just watch and listen for evidence of dark magic. learn what you can. above all, stay FAR away from norsunderian mages! i don’t want anyone to get hurt

emras: instructions unclear. i’ve taught myself magic by skipping the basics (including ethics) thanks to tips from a norsunderian mage (whoops). i have my own wizard tower. i fuck up the weather across the continent due to my fucked up weather magic spells in the mountains. i undid ten generations’ worth of wards on the marloven capital city and placed my own better, stronger, and straight up cooler wards the likes of which has never been seen in history before and has yet to be outmatched, even by norsunder. i spy on strangers and close friends alike in my aforementioned wizard tower (sorry i hate socializing :p). i am now on trial due to my evil fucked up wizard crimes. all accidental. sorry. what was it you wanted again?

#emras my fucking beloved #started out just trying to get books on the basics. when those were denied her (silly sartorans smh) she went. oh? i'll just do it myself #and then DID #absolute queen #hit the ball out the fucking park #v similar to when you're assigned a stupid project in highschool but your little gremlin brain latches onto it like oh? put Too Much Effort? #TOOOOOO much effort???? don't mind if i do!!! #how detlev 'taught' emras is so fucking funny he just went eh? wanna learn some super complicated magics most mages can't ever do? #don't worry it's easy. and emras said sure and did it #detlev comes back like ? oh fuck? you actually did it? alright here's a harder one. see you around maybe if you survive #and emras does it and he comes back like ? oh fuck you lived? alright- and the cycle repeats until she beats him at his own game lsdkfjsdlfs #get fucked old man #hyperfixation of the fuckin century yo #autism be damned my girl can cast evil spells #banner of the damned #sartorias-deles #emras' dark evil wizard tower is my favorite thing about her. it's what she deserves <3

[graychrissy]

🎀VOID IS EASY🎀

Dear friends I would like to say void is easy,super easy easier then cooking,easier then driving car,easier then whatever you think is easy. I'm telling you🤭.

Ok but have you guys ever noticed how most of the success comes from the simple basic one rather then complicated ones. And once they success they always tell how easy it was to enter void BECAUSE IT IS.

What I learn is basically stop overthinking. Literally just stop. Even if you're getting negative thought just let it pass. I'm being honest right now I had thousands of negative thought and doubts coming up when I was monitoring my thoughts but I didn't react I just let it pass. Slowly every thoughts start to disappear.

Do not ask yourself questions like "am I in void"?" "Did I reached void?" Because you'll know when you reach there it doesn't even take long because you'll busy monitoring the thoughts.

Also being patient is imo important because we tend to get excited and impatient when we try to enter void in hopes of getting all our desires. When we had to do is watch our thoughts,not pay attention to the 3d and not reacting to the negative thought.

I didn't really explain how I enter void in detail because I was excited,so let me tell you here. So I have been embodying my alter ego Venus she can enter void easily but let me tell you you don't have to embody anyone seriously BUT I'm not stopping anyone if you want you can do it. Anyways I was doing house chores then I workout a little after that I got tired and was just scrolling through Tumblr when I saw bee's post and thought let's try it mind you I didn't had any expectations but I was motivated to try it. So I sat up and start monitoring my thoughts and got many negative thoughts but I kept going,I wasn't impatient nor excited. Then slowly the thoughts fade away and I was in void.I stare at the black void and affirm for my desires only two though cuz shifting is my biggest desire.

Just few minutes ago I tried again and guess who entered void for the second time? Me🤭.

This reminded of the void success from reddit so I link it down below.

#void state #enter void state #void #void success #manifest #affirmations #manifesting #reality shift #shifting

[daisynik7]

Strawberry Soju

🎶 I don’t need another shot of you, but I got to, my strawberry soju 🎶

Pairing: Eren x f!reader

Rating: Explicit - MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

Genre: college au, enemies-to-lovers

Word Count: ~7.0k

cw: asshole!Eren, fratboy!Eren, subby!Eren, blowjob, cunnilingus, face riding, multiple orgasms, cowgirl, unprotected sex, alcohol, language.

Summary: Two weeks before graduation, you are finally done with your senior project. This calls for a celebration with your team, including the person who annoys you the most: Eren Jaeger. The two of you learn to put your differences aside for one night, starting with a bottle of strawberry soju. 

Notes: All characters are seniors in college (21-22 years old), engineering majors. Eren is a frat boy, so some details from my series Rush will be used, but no correlation to that story. Inspired by the song “Strawberry Soju”, which I’ve been obsessed with for the past two weeks. I had a lot of fun with this, so I hope you enjoy! Reblogs, likes, and/or comments are ALWAYS appreciated, thank you so much! 

“And now, we are proud to present the winner of this year’s Senior Project Showcase: Team Titan! For their omni-directional mobility gear, designed for construction workers in the field to ensure safety whilst elevated hundreds of feet in the air! Bravo, Team Titan! Bravo!”

Professor Pyxis’s announcement leaves you and your group flabbergasted. Sasha and Connie both have their jaws dropped. Eren, who sits beside you, throws his fist in the air, exclaiming, “Oh hell yeah!” You stay in your seat, in total shock.

Pyxis stares fondly at the four of you, beckoning you towards the stage in the main engineering lecture hall. “Don’t be shy, my young engineers, come here to accept your award!” Hesitantly, you all make your way behind the podium, a polite round of applause from the other students and faculty echoing throughout the room. 

Nearly an entire semester of work has led to this. Five months of grueling research, scrambling to acquire the right materials, complicated design issues that made you want to scream. Not to mention five months spent collaborating with the bane of your existence: Eren Jaeger. The award for first place barely makes up for a semester’s worth of torture; nonetheless, it’s still a pretty trophy.

It was fate that brought the four of you together back in January, the same fate that has spited you for whatever reason, forcing you to work alongside Eren, the most obnoxious, cocky, annoying person you have ever met in your short twenty-two years of living. While you had no issues with Connie or Sasha, you and Eren did not mesh. It’s been apparent since the beginning of the semester when you were chosen to be the team leader. He scoffed, claimed that he “would be a better choice, but whatever.” Your relationship with him was doomed from that day on. 

What’s odd is that he isn’t an asshole to the entire group; his less than pleasant behavior seems to be reserved for you, and only you. He gets on perfectly fine with Sasha and Connie, who have basically played mediator for you two, keeping as much of the peace as possible whenever an argument ensues. He usually instigates it, always making an unnecessary comment to get under your skin. At this point, you’re convinced he’s doing it on purpose just to get a rise out of you, because how can one human be this irritating?! 

Despite all the petty drama, you have to admit that he’s smart. Not only that, but he also works hard and gets shit done, no matter how much grief he gives you about it. And, if you squint hard enough, he maybe is, almost, sort of…hot. Strictly speaking from an objective standpoint, that is. Based on media-driven beauty standards and common qualities that are considered conventionally attractive by society. Of course, you will never, ever admit this aloud, especially not to him. You’re convinced that if he ever finds out, his massive head will explode, already overinflated from his gigantic ego. 

Your team crowds Pyxis, who happily hands you the trophy first. Eren, no surprise, snatches it from your clutches to hold it himself, kissing it and lifting it above him like he won a major league championship. You resist the urge to roll your eyes, trying to maintain professionalism in front of the watching staff. 

“Will your team leader give a few words about the project?” Pyxis asks, gaze on you, motioning to the stand. 

You tense up, usually nervous about public speaking. Clearing your throat, you lean into the mic. “Uh, thank you Professor Pyxis and the rest of the faculty for selecting our project. This has been a labor of love for the past five months and we are honored to have it recognized. We hope that this prototype and any of the research associated with it will help improve labor conditions for those working in construction, risking their lives every day.” 

You glance at Connie and Sasha to see if they’d like to add anything else. Connie adds, “Special shoutout to grad students Levi Ackerman, Erwin Smith, and Hange Zoe for helping us out a ton with our project, from offering advice to testing it out. We love you!” 

“And thank you Paradise Pizzeria and Café Utopia for fueling many late nighters throughout this whole semester! You rock!” Sasha exclaims, resulting in laughter from the audience. 

Eren grabs the mic from the stand, yelling, “This is dedicated to my fraternity brothers, for providing moral support during these trying times! Alpha Tau for life!” He holds the trophy in one hand, using the other to salute an inverted fist at his chest, sticking his tongue out.  

This time, you don’t contain your eye roll as the crowd laughs even louder, clearly amused by it. He passes the microphone back to Pyxis. “Fantastic! I love the enthusiasm of this team. Let’s give them all another big round of applause!”

After the presentation is over, Pyxis instructs, “They’d like to take your picture next to the ODM gear. The photographers are taking some shots of the other projects, so feel free to take your time heading to the Rose Center.” 

On the walk, Eren passes the trophy to Sasha. “What to hold it, Sash?”

“Sure! Still can’t believe we won!”

Connie puts his arm around her, staring at the prize. “I know it doesn’t really mean anything, but damn, is it nice to look at.”

Eren catches up to you, nudging you in the arm. “Would it have killed you to smile during your little speech?”

You shove your elbow into his ribs, a little harder than necessary. “I was smiling.” 

“You call that a smile? You looked like you were in a hostage situation. Like, blink three times if they’re hurting you type of deal,” he teases, that cocky smirk plastered on his face. 

“Like you were any better!” You stick your tongue out, mocking him. “Alpha Tau for life, bros!”

“I really meant it. I needed all the fucking help I could get, dealing with you this whole semester. If it weren’t for them, I would have gone fucking crazy because of you.”

“Oh right, because I’m the one driving you crazy, sure,” you respond, sarcastically.

“Hey, at least you’re admitting it! You’re finally making progress!” He claps in front of your face.

You shove him, glaring. “You are such a jerk.”

“Don’t be so sensitive, baby.”

“Oh, I am not your baby.”

Sasha jumps in between, yelling, “Enough! Both of you, stop it!!”

Connie joins in. “Yeah, we won today. Stop ruining the mood.”

Without you realizing it, the four of you have made it to the Rose Center, which is luckily vacant in the midst of your little spat with Eren. This is how your arguments usually go, all because of something petty that never leads anywhere. When the photographer arrives, they direct you to stand beside your project, already displayed in one of the glass windows. They take a couple of shots, then it’s over. Just like that, your senior project is officially done. There’s a huge weight lifted off your shoulders. All that’s left to do is to graduate. 

The sun is setting by the time the photoshoot is finished. The four of you exit the building, Sasha immediately announcing, “I’m hungry! Let’s get dinner one last time as a team!”

“I’m down for that. Any ideas where to go?” 

“Paradise Pizza?”

“No, we’ve had that way too many times this year. Let’s go somewhere special tonight.”

“There’s that all-you-can-eat Korean barbecue place downtown,” you suggest. “It’s only fifteen minutes away if we take the train.”

“Ooohh, I like the sound of that!”

“I’m down. Eren?”

He shrugs, hands in his pockets. That too-cool-to-care attitude apparent in his body language. “If that’s what everyone else wants, then I guess it’s fine.” If it had been either Sasha or Connie to suggest it, you know for a fact that he would have a more positive response. Because it’s you, he has to act like he’s being forced into it, reluctant to concede with absolutely everything you propose. 

You go your separate ways to change out of professional attire and into more comfortable clothes, agreeing to meet outside Eren’s in an hour. His apartment is closest to the train station, making it the most convenient. By 7:00PM, you’re inside the restaurant, seated at a table, grill fired up as you browse through the menu. Sasha, the ultimate foodie of the group, orders the first round of meats. You pick the drinks. 

“Two bottles of strawberry soju, please!” you tell the waiter. 

“Oh, I love soju!” Sasha squeals. 

You smile at her. “Me too. This flavor’s my favorite.”

Eren, who is somehow seated next to you, grunts. “Strawberry? Of course you’d pick some girly shit like that.”

“Hey man, don’t knock it till you try it,” Connie says. “This shit gets you fucked up fast. Trust me. I’ve gotten soju drunk before, and it’s awesome.”

He rolls his eyes in response. “Yeah, that’s because of all the extra fucking sugar, I bet. Sounds gross.”

The waiter arrives with the alcohol and four glasses, along with waters to share. You do the honors and pour everyone, except Eren, a shot. “I’m guessing you don’t want any of this gross soju, then?”

He snatches the shot glass, thrusting it towards you. “I didn’t say that. Just pour me some.” 

With glasses filled to the brim, you all cheers, then throw it back. The familiar flavor is refreshing and sweet on your tongue, smooth down your throat. 

“Shit, that’s good!” Connie raves.

“Strawberry might be my new favorite flavor! It’s so yummy!”

You face Eren, grinning. “Well?”

He shrugs, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “It’s alright.”

“Don’t lie to me. You like it, don’t you?” you tease, nudging him in the arm.

“I said it’s fine, okay?”

You stop pestering him, satisfied knowing that maybe you were finally right about something when it comes to him.

Soon, a plethora of tasty side dishes are scattered on the table. Rice, kimchi, fresh lettuce, potato salad, two helpings of steamed eggs to share. Three heaping plates of meat follow. Sasha begins barbequing, laying out portions of beef bulgogi on the hot grill as the rest of you watch hungrily, the steam and aroma surrounding you like a cozy embrace. Once it’s cooked, you help yourselves, stuffing your faces with perfectly grilled meat and whatever else you desire. Several bites in, you all decide to do another round of shots, first bottle almost finished.

“Good idea to do KBBQ tonight!” Sasha mentions. “I haven’t had it in a while. I forgot how much I love it.”

Connie chimes in, “Same! Which side dish is everyone’s favorite?”

Sasha immediately points to the potato salad. “Is there any doubt that mine would be this?”

“Of course we all know that potato girl. I like kimchi. What’s yours?”

You pick out your favorite. “This one, for sure.”

Eren makes an unapproving noise. “Of course you’d pick that. So basic.”

To keep the peace, especially on this night of celebration, you ignore the temptation to reply with an equally sassy comment. Instead, you ask, “Well, what’s your favorite, Eren?” 

“The steamed egg. It’s delicious and packs an extra serving of protein.” He flexes his bicep with a smug expression. “Not that I really need it.”

Connie and Sasha laugh, while you take a deep breath, using every ounce of willpower to keep your cool. You crack open the bottle, downing the remaining alcohol to help you get through the rest of the night.

“What’s everyone’s plans after graduation?” Connie asks.

Sasha answers first. “I’ll be working with my dad for our family business.”

“I’m sure Artur will appreciate all the new, high-tech engineering skills you have! If I’m still unemployed in two months, can you please hire me?”

“Of course!”

“What about you, Eren?”

“I got an offer in Marley,” he reveals. “It’s a pretty good gig, but I don’t know about moving overseas. I got another in Stohess to work for their weapons warehouse, so maybe I’ll accept that instead.”

“I’ve never been overseas,” you comment. “Sounds interesting if you do decide to go.” 

“Well, you’re wrong. It doesn’t sound interesting at all.”

Even your attempt at being polite is met with malice. “You always argue with me for the sake of arguing.”

He turns to face you, brows furrowed. “No I don’t!”

“You’re literally doing it right now! I was just trying to be nice.”

“Well, try harder,” he grumbles, picking meat off the grill.

“My god, you two are exhausting!” Sasha intervenes. 

Connie nods. “Seriously, don’t you get tired of fighting all the time?”

“Honestly, you two should do it and get it over with.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Eren leers at Sasha through the smoke. 

“I’m saying get all your anger out by fucking each other. Hate sex is the best medicine for situations like this,” she explains, matter of fact.

“No fucking way,” Eren says. “It’s not like that.”

“Definitely not,” you reiterate, cheeks warm. You pour yourself another shot, already on the second bottle, not offering a serving to anyone else. Desperate for liquor with the direction this conversation is going.

“Wow, you two actually agree on something for once!” Connie teases. “See? Isn’t this nice?”

The duo giggle together, finding enjoyment from your current state of misery. Eren clears his throat, muttering something unintelligible. He reaches for the soju in front of you, avoiding your gaze as he tips it into his empty shot glass, instantly downing it. Before the silence gets awkward, you change the subject, mentioning some idle gossip you heard around the engineering department, to which Connie and Sasha have plenty to contribute to. 

An hour later, the four of you manage to finish most of the food, only a few pieces of charred meat left over. Sasha and Connie rub their stomachs, satisfied by the feast. You and Eren end up finishing the last bottle between the two of you. Since the comment from earlier, neither of you have spoken directly, avoiding each other. 

Connie slumps into the chair, patting his belly. “Let’s play a game while we digest! Truth or eat. If you don’t answer, you have to eat these burnt pieces of bulgogi.”

Eren laughs. “That sounds fun. I’m down.” He looks to you, brow raised, challenging. “You in, princess?”

You bite your cheek, holding in the clever retort at his annoying nickname for you, also relieved he’s back to normal. “Sure, why not?”

“I’ll go first,” Sasha volunteers, sitting up in her seat. “Eren, who’s the freakiest brother in Alpha Tau?” 

Without hesitating, he states, “Armin, for sure.”

“Armin?! Really?”

“Yup. He’s one kinky motherfucker,” he grins. He turns to face you. “Why do you hate me so much?”

“You want the whole essay, or an abridged version?” you reply, smirking as you sip on your water.

Sasha giggles while Connie mutters under his breath, “Oh boy.”

Eren doesn’t let up. “Give me one reason.”

Contemplating which of the many grievances you should expose about him, you finally decide on one. “You always disagree with me, no matter what. Whether it’s something about the project, or something as simple as a side dish preference.”

“We already know that, though. What else?”

“Hey, you wanted one reason, and I gave it to you.” You think for a few seconds, adding, “And to be fair, hate is a strong word. I don’t hate you.”

It’s true. While he annoys you beyond your wit’s end, you don’t hate him. He’s a quarter of the reason you all achieved what you did. You focus back on the table, avoiding Eren’s expression. “Connie, have you two ever hooked up?” you question, pointing at the duo.

“Gross! No!”

“Absolutely not. We’re practically twins. That’d be illegal.”

“Yup. We’re basically two halves of a whole idiot.” 

You laugh with them, taking another sip of water as Connie poses a question to Eren. “Why do you give her such a hard time?” he asks, referring to you. 

“Here we go,” you mumble, ready for an onslaught of ridiculous reasons.

It’s silent for a few moments, then he takes his chopsticks, grabbing at the charred meat on the grill, placing it into his mouth to eat quietly.

“What?!” Sasha yells. “You’re not going to tell us?” 

Connie smirks. “Must be pretty bad, then.”

You watch him slowly chew the burnt food, a small smile on his face. As if there’s a secret he’s keeping from everybody else at the table. Why would he refuse to answer the question that he basically asked you? Is his hatred for you that intense that he chooses not to say it, to save you from humiliation? What could you have possibly done to him to warrant this kind of treatment? Maybe it’s the liquor leading you to jump to conclusions, to be slightly offended by his choice. Maybe even a little hurt. 

When he’s done, he chugs his whole water. “Alright, my turn again.”

“Wait, really?”

“We’re just going to pretend that didn’t happen?”

“Yup,” he responds, nonchalant. 

“Why?”

“Hey, I ate that shit, right? Let it go,” he states, more aggressively this time.

You remain silent, mind racing with all types of ideas. You pay no more attention to the game, contemplating all the possible reasons Eren Jaeger would hate you so much. To be fair, he’s the one who starts it first. All you do is defend yourself. Why would he have any bigger reason to dislike you more than you dislike him?

Connie yells out your name, breaking you out of your reverie. “Hey, are you in?”

“Huh?”

“Karaoke! There’s a bar down the street.”

After paying the check, split evenly, the four of you head to the karaoke bar, booking a private room for an hour. You all sing your hearts out while sobering up from whatever buzz you developed from the soju. Any strange concerns you had about Eren evaporate. The two of you even seem to get along, performing a few duets together.

On the train ride back near campus, the four of you share more laughs, enjoying possibly the last time you’ll be together. With everyone graduating and off to their own paths, it’s hard to tell when, or if, you’ll ever see each other again.  

From the station, you start you trek home, pausing outside Eren’s apartment to chat a bit more, until Sasha says, “I guess this is goodbye!”

“Yeah, thanks for all your hard work. This was really fun,” Connie adds, smiling. 

“We should all try to keep in touch.”

Eren hugs Connie, then Sasha. The two of you look at each other, contemplating if you should embrace also. Suddenly, you blurt out, “Actually, can I use your bathroom? I have to pee.”

You really do have to pee, but surely, you could have made it the extra ten minutes to your own apartment to do so, right? For some reason, your mind convinces you to stay with him just a little longer. There’s a pending task you have to complete before you part ways for good. You hope for closure, to end things on a good note. 

You, Connie, and Sasha exchange hugs, leaving with a final wave, disappearing into the distance. Despite the pleasant warmth of the summer night, there’s a noticeable chill in the air. Not from the weather, rather, from the growing tension surrounding you and Eren. His voice is quiet when he says, “Alright, I guess we can head in now.”

You nod, following him through the entrance. At the elevator, he swipes a keycard, pushing the button to go up to the third floor. The doors open and you step in, still not speaking a word. Arriving at his door, he unlocks it, holding it for you. 

“Bathroom is down to the right,” he points, removing his shoes at the entrance.

You copy him, sliding out of your sneakers. “Okay cool. Thank you.” 

Once you find the bathroom, you swiftly close the door, fully aware that you are inside Eren Jaeger’s apartment. Naturally, curiosity gets the best of you. With a quick glance around the room, you can tell he’s tidy. Towels hung properly, actual floor mats on the tiles, toilet seat down. Is he anticipating a visit from a friend? Maybe a lover? You can’t help letting your imagination run wild. 

Finished with your business, you walk out of the bathroom to find him sitting on the couch, television playing a show you’re familiar with. “Have you seen this episode yet? The new season just started,” you mention, stepping towards him.

He stands up, turning to face you. “I haven’t. Was planning to watch it tonight.”

“Cool,” is all you manage to utter. 

There’s another moment of awkward silence until he asks, “You want to watch it with me?”

Without thinking, you agree.

The two of you sit on opposite ends of the couch, watching in silence. About halfway through, with a soft chuckle, he admits, “That strawberry soju wasn’t bad. Actually, it was pretty good.”

This catches you off guard. You look at him, grinning. “Wow. It took you this long to finally come clean about it.”

“Better late than never, right?” He keeps his eyes forward, smirking. 

You adjust, completely facing him. “Since you’re being honest about that, can you tell me why you didn’t answer Connie’s question?”

He plays dumb. “What question?”

“Why do you give me such a hard time?”

He clicks his tongue, shaking his head. “You’re still thinking about that?”

“Yeah, I am,” you confess. “Seems a little odd to me that wouldn’t just say it.”

Finally, he matches you, repositioning himself to set his gaze on yours. “Why do you care so much?”

“I’m curious. Since we’ll be graduating soon, we’ll probably never see each other again. I figured we should put everything out there. Get some closure. Make amends.”

He scoffs. “I wasn’t aware there were any amends to make.”

You’re getting annoyed now, impatient with his round-about comments. “Seriously? You think our relationship is normal?”

“I don’t think we have a relationship at all.”

You stand up, regretting being here in the first place. He’s the same asshole he’s always been. What we’re you expecting? Why would he be any different tonight? 

“Fine. Forget it. What a waste of time. Good job on the project, and I hope you have a great life.” You stomp towards the exit, not bothering to look at him.

Suddenly, his hand shoots out, gripping you loosely around the wrist. “Wait. Don’t go.”

You glare at him, eyes narrowed in frustration, skin tingly from the physical contact. Waiting for him to elaborate.

“I’m sorry, okay?” he stammers. “I’m not…I can’t really…” he trails off, not finishing his sentences.

When he doesn’t proceed, you ask, “Why do you hate me so much?”

“I don’t hate you.”

“Then why do you treat me this way? Why me?”

He swallows hard, the truth difficult for him to spit out. “It’s dumb.” 

“I don’t care. Just tell me.”

He lets out a sigh, averting his gaze to the floor. “It’s because I like you, okay?” 

It takes a moment for you to process what he’s saying. Eventually, you stammer, “You like me?”

“Yeah, I like you,” he reiterates, still staring at his own feet. “You’re cute. You’re the smartest person I know. And you’re also a fucking pain in my ass. But I like you.”

That last part would normally have you on the verge of swinging; however, it’s almost endearing the way he says it. Your sudden change in heart has you questioning if you’re drunk from the liquor you consumed hours ago. “Why would you treat me like this if you like me?”

Another deep sigh as he explains, “I don’t know. Because I’m a fucking idiot and I’m immature. I told you, it’s dumb.”

“It’s not dumb. I just…I didn’t expect this.”

More silence falls between you two. You look down at his big hand still holding you, racing heartbeat reverberating through your chest. You’re not sure how to react. So, you go with your instinct. 

You kiss him.

~~~

Eren doesn’t know why he started it months ago at the beginning of the semester. If he’s being completely honest, he’s got the body of Greek god, the intelligence of a genius, and the maturity, or in this case, immaturity, of a fifth grader. That being said, whatever it is that he has going with her, he’s decided to classify it as a schoolboy crush. Like a kid on the playground picking on another kid, doing everything they can to garner all their attention, no matter how annoying it is. 

It began with snide remarks here and there, nothing ever too cruel to be considered bullying, but enough to make her bite back. He’s not sure why he kept it up so long, especially after realizing he actually likes her. In his mind, negative attention is better than no attention at all. He can’t be normal around her; being a nuisance is what he’s comfortable with.

Another reason is that he’s intimidated by her. She could see right through his cocky demeanor. Break him down into the vulnerable little shit he really is. The grief he caused her is some bizarre defense mechanism, a way to deny his true feelings for her. All to protect himself and his heart. 

He was supposed to go to a frat party tonight after hanging out with the team. Instead, he finds himself alone with her in his apartment, everything revealed, his confession hanging heavy in the air. 

Even more unexpected is her leaning forward to kiss him, lips soft and gentle against his. Hesitant and uncertain. Sweet and tangy from the lingering essence of the strawberry soju from earlier. Before he gets carried away, he pulls off, whispering, “Are you sure about this?”

“No,” she admits. “But I can’t deny that I’m curious.”

“We shouldn’t do this then. It doesn’t feel right.”

“Just…shut up and let me check something.”

He obeys, closing his eyes, waiting for her move. She kisses him again, more confidentially this time, hand sliding to his nape to pull him closer. 

“Fuck, are you sure this is okay?” he breathes out, slowly losing his composure.

She nods, smiling. “Yes.”

“You’re positive?”

“Yes.”

“Absolutely certain?”

“If you ask me one more time, you’re really going to piss me off,” she warns, grazing her mouth along his neck, sucking at the skin of his throat.

He nods erratically. “Okay, okay. I’m sorry. Fuck.”

She pushes him back towards the couch, falling into the cushions. He watches in awe as she strips her sweatpants, revealing pink lacey panties.  She sits in his lap, legs spread wide with him between, clothed pussy against his pulsating cock. His hands are to his sides, clenched to the cushion of the couch. With her lips brushing his ear, she whispers, “You can touch me if you want.”

His cock twitches, erection growing by the second as she straddles him. Carefully, he slides his palms around her waist, moaning a trembling, “Thank you.” Hands at her bottom, he squeezes her ass cheeks in a firm grasp, fingers slipping underneath the fabric, dangerously close to her arousal.

Without thinking, he blurts out, “Use me. Do what you want with me. You’re the leader.”

There’s a wicked smile on her face as soon as he says it. “Eren Jaeger is going to let me use him?”

All pride is thrown out the window. He doesn’t care anymore about giving into weakness. With graduation only two weeks away, and no promise of ever seeing each other again, he decides fuck it. He’s going to do whatever he can to fulfill this fantasy of his. And if that means submitting to her, begging and groveling at her feet, he’ll fucking do it. 

“Yeah,” he growls. “Use me as your fuck toy. I’ll do whatever you want. Just fucking use me.”

“Didn’t think Alpha Tau’s frat star would behave like this,” she murmurs, sucking on his ear lobe. 

“Does it turn you on?”

“Maybe.”

“Good. Fucking wreck me apart then. Don’t hold back,” he demands. There’s already precum leaking from his tip, soaking through the cotton of his briefs. “Consider it payback for this semester.”

She responds by grinding her hips on his lap. He’s desperate to feel her without fabric separating them, but he knows what he agreed to. He can’t do anything without her permission, without her initiating. She rides him for another minute, his palms on her ass, following her motions. His cock throbs beneath her, aching for release from the confines of his pants. There’s an audible whine developing in his throat, needy for anything.

On cue, she swings her leg over to kneel beside him, tugging at the waistband of his sweats and underwear. He lifts his hips as she slides them off simultaneously, freeing his stiff cock. He watches her marvel at his erection, noticing desire in her eyes. Before he knows it, she’s bent towards his lap, mouth hovering his dick, licking at the slit. 

“Fuck,” he moans. “Goddamn.”

She continues to tease him, leaving the shaft untouched, tongue swirling the tip, lapping at his precum. 

“Fuck, please. Touch me,” he begs, legs quivering from arousal. 

Without warning, she wraps her fist around him, surrounding the tip with her mouth, bobbing up and down in sync with her strokes. She starts slow, increasing the pace with each guttural moan that emits within his chest. The temptation to buck his hips into her warm, wet heat is tantalizing, but he reminds himself that she’s in control, which only turns him on more.

She uses her other hand to fondle his balls, causing him to swear loudly. “Fuck!”

He feels the vibration of her giggle through his cock, clearly enjoying the way she’s unravelling him, his orgasm approaching fast. “Can I please come?”

She shakes her head, still working his dick. 

“Fuck. I can’t…I can’t hold it.” 

She releases him from her mouth, stroking him, face close to his. “You think you deserve to come now?”

He nods eagerly. “Yes.”

“Apologize first.”

“Huh?”

“Apologize. Admit that you’re a fucking asshole.” She nibbles on his ear lobe, dragging it down between her lips, still jerking him off. 

“I’m sorry. I’m a,” he chokes on his spit before he can finish. “Fucking asshole.”

“Tell me your desperate for it. That you need it.” 

“Fuck, I’m so fucking desperate, I fucking need it. Please.”

“Good,” she whispers, pumping him faster. She kisses him on the lips, grip tight around him as his cock swells, hanging by a thread at the edge of his climax. “Go ahead. Come for me, Eren.”

At the sound of his name on her sultry lips, he does, hot cum shooting straight onto his t-shirt. “Fuck!” he yells, eyes shut tight, riding out one of the best orgasms of his life. She strokes him until his balls are completely drained. Finally, he opens his eyes to inspect the scene, shocked by the mess painted across the bottom of his shirt, spilling onto his abdomen. 

“Holy shit,” he mutters, smiling at her.

She grins back at him. “Not bad, right?”

“Not bad at all. Really fucking good, actually.” He kisses her, fingers drifting down to her arousal, rubbing the fabric against her clit. “Come here. Let me eat this pretty pussy out. Please. I want it so bad.”

“Since you said it so nicely, I guess I can let you have a taste.” 

~~~

You stand up, leaving room for him to lay down on the couch. He doesn’t need to be told. He expects you to ride that pretty face of his. When he’s flat on his back, shirt stripped off and completely naked, he turns to watch you slip out of your panties.

“You’re so fucking sexy,” he praises, reaching down to rub his balls. “I think about this a lot, you know.”

You toss your underwear to the floor, watching him play with himself, removing your remaining clothes. “What do you think about?”

“This. You, naked in my apartment. Riding my face till you come. Fucking your wet pussy right after.”

“I guess tonight’s your lucky night,” you tease, lifting your knee across him, straddling his face. 

“Yes, it is,” he replies, licking his lips, eyes wide with lust at your pussy above him, already wet with arousal. He cranes his neck upwards, tongue out, desperate for a taste.

“Not yet.” You lift up enough so he’s out of reach. “Watch me play with myself first.”

“Fuck,” he swears, salivating.  

You wet your middle finger with your slick, rubbing circles around your clit. He watches in a daze, biting his lower lip, brows knit together in concentration, focused on you pleasuring yourself right above him. He squirms beneath you, thrusting his hips into the air, in an effort to feel anything. “Get it fucking juicy for me, baby. I want to fucking drown in it.”

The little nicknames you’ve grown accustomed to hating has a very different ring to it now. For the first time all semester, you don’t mind it. You actually like it. With your free hand, you run your fingers through his hair, redirecting his gaze on yours. “That’s right. I’m your baby. And what are you?”

He swallows hard. “I…I don’t know.”

“You’re my fuck toy.”

“Fuck yeah. I’m your fuck toy, baby. I’m your fuck toy. Use me, please.”

With your grip firm on his hair, you sink lower, your pussy pressed to his open mouth. He licks your clit, swiping his wide tongue over it, moving side to side. You moan at the glorious sensation, rocking your hips across his face to feel more. He latches onto your swollen bud, humming in pleasure as he suckles on it. His hips rut into nothing again, arms at his sides, clutching hard at the cushions, letting you be in total control. This power he gives you turns you on more than you imagined. Maybe because all semester, he always acted as if he had the upper hand. Knowing how desperate he is to be beneath you, to please you beyond any other desire he has, it only spurs you on. 

You grind yourself on his face, the squelching noises indicating how sloppy he’s eating you out and how wet you’re becoming because of it. He’s relentless, alternating between licking, slurping, and sucking at your clit. You blissfully indulge in it until you climax on his tongue, bud over-stimulated, pussy soaked with his spit and your slick. 

“Fuck,” he muffles, slurping the cum from your sleek entrance. Legs wobbly from your orgasm, you lift off him, shifting to reposition yourself comfortably on top. His cock is hard beneath you, sticky with his cum from earlier. Through shiny lips, he whines, “I’m so fucking hard again. Fuck me. Fuck me with that wet pussy.”

Reaching behind you, you align him with your slit, sinking down on his shaft. He lets out a gasp, “I’m so fucking sensitive, fuck.” Concerned, you attempt to lift off, but he shakes his head fervently. “Don’t. Please baby. Fuck me till I come. I need it. I need it.”

You ride him, bouncing your ass on his lap, thrusting his cock deep inside you. He moans loudly, babbling filthy words from his needy mouth.

Use this cock, baby. Fuck me like a toy. 

Make yourself come on this dick. 

It’s all fucking yours. Take it, baby. Take it. 

I’m all yours. I’m all yours.

You moan with him, another climax approaching. Grabbing his wrist, you guide him to your clit. He caresses your puffy bud with his fingers. “I’m going to come,” you whimper.

“Can I come with you, princess? Please, can I come inside you?”

You nod wordlessly, pumping him in and out of you faster as he rubs your clit relentlessly, determined to make you orgasm. When you cry out in ecstasy, he joins you. “Fuck, I’m coming. I’m coming, baby.”

For the second time tonight, both of you come, this time together. He spills inside you, filling your cunt with his warm, creamy load as you coat his dick with yours. Your body is spent from the euphoria, throat dry from whining in pleasure, and your curiosity satiated. It’s a lie to say you’ve never imagined being fucked silly by Eren. No matter how much he annoyed you, irritated you, aggravated you, there were moments this semester when you thought about it. How good it would feel to ride him, fuck him dumb until he’s begging for release. 

“I’m exhausted,” he giggles, limp on the couch, softening cock still inside you, wrapping you in a snug embrace.

“Me too.” You settle into his arms, relaxed and comfortable against his chest. 

“Thank you,” he mutters, caressing your back tenderly. “Thank you.” He doesn’t elaborate, repeating it a few more times as he nuzzles his nose into the top of your head.

You cuddle together in a comfortable silence. “Sleep here tonight. I have an extra toothbrush and you can wear my clothes.” 

Accepting his offer, the two of you start tidying, picking up strewn wardrobe from the floor, wiping away the sticky aftermath of sex. You hop in the shower, rinsing your bodies clean, exchanging passionate kisses while the water splashes you. After you dry off and brush your teeth, you change into an oversized t-shirt and a pair of boxers he lends you, jumping into the bed beside him. He smiles at you. “You look good in my clothes.”

You give him a smooch, getting yourself cozy under the covers. He spoons you, arm sliding over your waist, interlacing his fingers with yours. His breath is pleasantly warm on your neck. “I know we’re probably past this already, but I want to formally apologize. It wasn’t right the way I treated you, and I’m sorry. Genuinely.”

“Apology accepted,” you respond, squeezing his hand. “I’m sorry too. For saying anything that hurt you out of anger.”

“You don’t have to be. I deserved it.”

“Still, I’m sorry. And no one deserves that.”

“All is forgiven then.” He chuckles softly. “For two smart people, we sure are dumb.”

You laugh with him. “If only we were a tad bit smarter, we could have started this months ago.”

“Yeah," he says, nestling his face against your neck. "You’re right.”

Nothing else is said as the two of you drift into sleep. It’s nice, having closure on a previously volatile relationship. However, something else lingers after tonight. Another door opens, leading to the unknown. He confessed his true feelings for you. You didn’t have time to process it, too focused on settling your truce through sex. While there’s no doubt that you find him physically attractive, can you really move on from the past and give him a chance? 

~~~

The words are on the tip of his tongue, and he decides to keep it that way, not wanting to disrupt this moment of peace. Not wanting to complicate it any further. He knows that this is the beginning and the end of whatever this fling is. She hasn’t reciprocated his feelings and he won’t pressure her to, not tonight. Maybe not ever. No matter how badly he wishes to see her again, keep in touch, make it official, he won’t ask that of her. At the end of the day, it’s his own fault for waiting too long, for being too late. Time has run out, and now he’s paying the price.

They stay in each other’s arms, Eren listening closely to the sound of her steady breathing. Cherishing how her fingers fit seamlessly in his, the small smile on her lips as she drifts into a tranquil slumber, the warmth and weight of her body against his.  

The next morning, he wakes up, alone. If not for the stack of clothes he let her borrow folded neatly at the end of the bed, he would have thought last night’s events were all a dream. He vaguely recalls her waking up beside him, placing a chaste kiss on his forehead, sneaking out on her tippy toes at the crack of dawn. Still, he searches the apartment, calling out her name to no response. 

Throughout the week, he’s constantly on the verge of texting her. He never goes through with it, though, scared to be rejected. Afraid of having the final memory of her be one of heartbreak. 

As a last-ditch effort, he devises a plan. Eren hosts a party at his place to celebrate the upcoming graduation. He invites the Alpha Tau brothers, plus some sorority girls for good measure. However, his main objective is to invite her. He ends up sending a group text to his senior project team, casually informing them of his little gathering. Sasha and Connie both reply, announcing their attendance, but she doesn’t.

At the party, he tries not to think about her, distracting himself by socializing with the crowds of people already filling his apartment. When Connie and Sasha arrive together, he decides to try one more time before he consumes his sorrows away. After exchanging polite greetings with them, he asks, “Have you guys heard anything from her?”

“Nope. I don’t think she even texted back, right?”

Eren’s ready to reach for the closest container of booze he can find. The duo walks past him to enjoy the party while he remains standing, watching the door for another minute. Just as he’s about to turn his heel, he sees it open slowly. 

She walks in, her favorite drink in hand, a happy expression on her face as soon as she spots him. In the background, someone yells out, “Eren! Tequila shots?”

Waving the familiar bottle at him, she smiles.

“Nah,” Eren responds, gazing at her with a grin. “I’m sticking with strawberry soju from now on.”

--------------------

Taglist: @liliorsstuff-blog @batafuraikisu @bloompompom @belovedackerman @wtfiswrongwithme1

#eren jaeger #eren smut #eren x reader #eren x y/n #eren x you #eren x fem!reader #attack on titan #attack on titan smut #eren jaeger x reader #eren jaeger smut #eren yeager #aot smut #strawberry soju

[help-itrappedmyself]

Dead On Main Part 10

Masterpost

It takes Jason a few minutes, with coaching from Jazz, to learn how to go back to normal. Jazz started leading Jason back to the house. Jason had a lot of questions, but he knew most of them should wait for Danny. One of them was a little more urgent though.

“So, what happened to Plasmius back there?” Jason asked.

“I souped him, he’s in the thermos.” Jazz answers, like that makes any sense at all.

“Okay, and what does that mean?”

Jazz has to take a moment. She was so deep in thought she forgot that Danny was Jason for a moment. “Oh. He doesn’t have a fully corporeal form, so he’s basically in time out. It doesn’t hurt him or anything.”

Well, that’s good to know at least. “What do you mean he doesn’t have a corporeal form? He was fighting like he did.”

“Oh, he’s a liminal, an ecto-being. My parents would call him a ghost.”

Jason bluescreens. “A ghost?”

“Yeah, ghosts exist.” Jazz explains calmly. “It’s complicated. Danny will be able to explain it a lot better than I can. He’s better at the practical sciences.”

Jason snorted at the thought that ghosts were a practical science.

“Well, what do you do with Plasmius next?”

“Usually just let him go after a bit of soup time.” Jazz shrugs.

Jason frowns at that. But he doesn’t know how the thermos is holding someone without corporeal form in the first place. But he’s a  ghost, so.

Jason and Jazz got back to the Fenton’s house shortly after that. Jason had spent the rest of the walk thinking of the implications of ghosts. They didn’t run into the Drs. Fenton, Jason didn’t know if they were still working or already went to bed, but they were able to pass through to the bedrooms without difficulty. 

Jason did everything he could to get ready for bed. He laid there for a minute or two, thinking about the day. He turned over to grab Danny’s phone off the nightstand and sent his phone a text, then tried his hardest to fall asleep. He didn't receive a reply until the morning.

#my writing #fanfiction #batman #danny phantom #dpxdc #dcxdp #dead on main #soulmate au

[night-raven-tattler]

Hello Mx Tattly, I hope I can request some angst for GN!MC x Jamil? Basically, what could be the reasons for them to break up, and how would Jamil handle the fallout?

Hello, anon! Mx Tattly is pleased with the request! Being a teen in love is hard, and first relationships are rarely successful. Mx Tattly still hopes you enjoy!

Relationships are...

Characters: Jamil × GN!Reader (romantic)

Warnings: angst, failing relationship, breakup, misunderstandings, mention of crying

By opening the document, you agree to Mx Tattly's terms of source confidentiality.

-ˋˏ’✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

1. Relationships are a stupid idea, but everyone is a bit stupid sometimes, even Jamil.

The moment Jamil agreed to go on your first date, his first date, he knew there was no coming back

Something about the new territory and the uncertainty of teenage love made him nervous

He interpreted the nerves making his stomach twist and turn as the famous love butterflies everyone was talking about

Maybe in the beginning they were

When everything was nice and you both were riding the high of the relationship

You seemed to understand him so well, doing your best to support him by supporting him emotionally or giving a hand with his tasks around the dorm

You loved his cooking, his meticulous nature and his dedication to be on top of everything

And he knew that

He cooked you meals that he always called “leftovers” because admitting he put some of his time aside just for you felt a little too personal, too much

He memorized your schedule and always “just happened to pass by you” while you were heading to classes outside of the school building

He offered you the possibility of joining him and Kalim when they studied, wanting to help you understand more of his world without outwardly saying it

Jamil wished to be understood, to be read for once

But maybe the reading material he tried to offer you was in a language you were not ready to learn…

One evening after his club activities, you tried to invite him to spend the night with you

A sleepover, nothing more

Jamil would’ve loved that

Being away from Kalim for a night, enjoying some alone time with his sweetheart…

But he remembered Kalim needed help putting his uniform in the morning

And he also had to prepare his breakfast

And leaving at the crack of dawn just to help him and inconvenience you by waking you up was not worth it

He thought he did the right thing by refusing your offer- no, he knew he did the right thing

Inconveniencing you was unacceptable, his sweetheart deserved to enjoy their sleep

It’s the least he could do after denying your thoughtful offer

“...Okay. I get it. Maybe next time.”

Exactly, next time! When he will be able to trust Kalim more-

No, trust his dorm mates to care for Kalim better so he can have time for himself

But you have to accept the fact that Kalim was someone he was obligated to prioritize

And he knew you understood, he was sure of it by now

Otherwise, you wouldn't have agreed to date him, right?

『••✎••』

2. Relationships are far too complicated, why can’t the feelings involved just be easier to deal with?

Jamil wasn’t lucky enough to have a simple life

He cared for you, really

But the way you started being less talkative to him made no sense to him

He offered you dinner every evening, still calling it “leftovers” but now as an inside joke

And he even stood with you for a few minutes while you ate before running back to Scarabia after a frantic call from one of the students about Kalim

“Yeah, I understand. Go, Jamil. Hope you don’t have too much of a mess to clean up.”

And the next day, he’d make sure to walk you to your classes outside the main school building

Even if Kalim trailing after you like a hyperactive puppy

Or even if he could only walk you halfway through because he didn’t dare leave Kalim unsupervised for too long

Despite your silence, you still accepted his presence

And even warmed up to him back somewhat as you walked

But then things would get weird with your mood again

Jamil tried explaining a simple formula to you that you simply couldn’t wrap your head around

No matter how he explained it to you, it was something beyond your comprehension

“I know you can do it, Reader. Just focus.”

“I am focusing, Jamil. I think I just need a break, that’s all.”

“Alright, but after 10 minutes we’ll get back to it again. I can’t have you fall behind, even Kalim understands it.”

After the 10 minutes ran out, you made an excuse to leave and packed your things while you asked him not to text you for the rest of the day

Jamil wasn’t stupid, but feelings sure made him feel like it

After all, he was finally to put together the source of your frustration

『••✎••』

3. Relationships are a sham.

Talking to you about your frustrations with Kalim was fruitless

“You’re too glued to him, you deserve some space!”

“When was the last time we simply spent some time together without any disturbances?!”

“He won’t die if you let him on his own for a bit! What is he, a child?!”

He left your dorm more frustrated than before

Frustrated at Kalim for consuming his life like the parasyte he was

Frustrated at you for not understanding his position

Frustrated at himself...

For thinking you’d understand…

He never got what he wanted, why would this time be different?!

He collapsed on his bed and lost sleep over his self pity

『••✎••』

4. Relationships are tough… but is it that bad?

You came to him early in the morning, and apologized profusely for your outburst

You understood his position, you really thought you did

But the frustration got to you, no matter how hard you tried to push it away

Jamil accepted your apology, and you clung onto each other for the next few days, a reminder of the early days

But even after making amends, you never managed to quite find your old footing again

Jamil started forgetting about making your dinner with you and brought actual leftovers with him

It’s still the thought that counts, right?

You understood the moment you noticed the sudden abundance of spices

You also told Jamil he didn’t need to guide you around school all the time, you can just meet when you had classes around the same area

You went back to studying with both Kalim and Jamil, but you only payed attention when Jamil was explaining a concept both you and Kalim would need for your classes

You finally found a balance

That’s what he thought anyway

Yes, the time spent together seemed to diminish slightly, but no couple had all partners glued to each other all the time, right?

That’s why the return of your silence made his stomach turn

But, this time, you broke your own silence

“I don’t think I like the way things are going, Jamil.”

“I care about you, I do, but I know you’re spreading yourself too thin.”

“I miss having alone time with you, I… I can’t keep going like this. I’m sorry.”

You waited for a reply, any reply

Jamil only said one thing

“As you wish.”

You stood there for a few seconds, unsure what to do

Then you rushed out of his room

As a last act of kindness to you as his lover, he let you go

He finally realised you felt caged, so he released you

Jamil has felt caged his entire life

And doing that to you was too much for him

He let you go the moment you wanted out without putting up a fight

He could take his revenge on Kalim because he hated him

But you…

He couldn’t hate you, as much as he wanted to in that moment

All Jamil could hate was himself for not being better at this whole relationship thing, maybe that would’ve made you stay longer

『••✎••』

5. Relationships are not his cup of tea

Jamil was somewhat numb after the breakup

It was just a relationship, he didn’t need to fret over it for too long

He tried moving forward and simply sticking to his routine

A routine that he intertwined so much with yours that he often saw you in the hallways

When you saw him, you did your best to keep things brief and leave as soon as possible

You obviously were trying to “make things less awkward”

But he was clearly unbothered

He was fine

Everything was fine

So why didn’t you want to talk to him like before?

Did the friendship you had before dating just go up in flames?!

He soon followed your lead, avoiding you just like you avoided him

Kalim became the sole background noise of his life once again, but he had no more energy to be frustrated about it

He didn’t like to admit it but Kalim being his usual annoying self helped him slip back into his routine before meeting you

Except for when Kalim talked about you

A conversation topic Jamil refused to indulge with

Kalim missed you and became sad when you rejected his attempts at smoothing things over for his friend

And Jamil had no energy to argue with him anymore

After all, he deserved the silence and the awkwardness and the avoidance and the emptiness

The numb ache in his heart that reminded him of everything he did wrong

A growing dull ache that he never seemed to shake away

Until one night, when he woke up from a dream that had you in it

And he allowed to cry for you once

Just once

At least once

And it helped him slightly slip back to his old self again

His grumpy yet meticulous, clever yet in hiding, caring yet clumsy in the affairs of love

At the end of the day he had to accept the fact that whatever happened is over, and his only option is moving forward

The numb ache slowly dwindled as he saw you less and less, your past connection a blurry memory

Maybe relationships are not for him

He had better things to look after anyway

Like... you know, what he's always been doing

#twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #jamil viper #jamil viper x reader #no beta we die like jamil's relationship......... the tattler will see himself out goodbye

[prismatic-bell]

If you have ADHD or any other neurodivergence (including physical brain damage) that causes forgetfulness and disorganized thinking, THIS POST IS FOR YOU. (If this doesn’t describe you, it might still be useful to you, but it’s aimed at my fellow forgetters.)

I cannot urge you enough to try going analog.

Look at this.

Of the six things I needed that aren’t crossed off (the fruit butter was optional and I was only getting it if they had plum): three have to be purchased at an ethnic grocery, two of them this store didn’t carry my brand, and one of them I prefer the onion selection at my regular store (this store had really tiny ones). You’ll notice none of these are “I forgot it.” They’re something I need to go to another store for, and that’s it.

There are four things in this cart that weren’t on my list: kosher chicken broth (which I know I’m out of and is always good to have on hand as a staple), a yahrzeit candle for my grandfather whose yahrzeit is coming up, an extra bag of sugar because I’m about to do my Purim baking, and a bottle of red wine vinegar because I know I’m also out of that and while it’s not technically a staple I do use it A LOT. You can literally look at my cart in this photo and match everything (except the chicken broth and red wine vinegar) to the crossed-off items on the list.

Everything on this list is going into planned meals for which I have the recipes on paper. And the dates they’re needed are written on my very analog calendar, hanging on my cupboard.

Compare this to digital lists, where I tend to forget half of what’s on them and fill my cart with stuff I don’t need, resulting in a ton of snacks and disparate ingredients that don’t actually make anything. During Covid I accidentally hoarded 40 rolls of toilet paper, and if you’re wondering how one accidentally hoards 40 rolls of toilet paper, it’s because every time I went to the store I went “…did I buy toilet paper? Better get one just in case, the shortage is still going.” I DIDN’T NEED TO BUY TOILET PAPER FOR A YEAR AFTER THE VACCINES STARTED ROLLING OUT. I was never sure if I’d bought it or just forgot to put it on the digital list. Analog forces me to stop, slow down, and pay attention instead of typing things in at the speed of light.

There’s actually a scientific explanation for this, and I learned it a long time ago so I’m going to ask forgiveness for being kinda vague on specifics here, but the basic version is that you use different parts of your brain for typing and writing, and the writing part is more closely linked with the memory part, so you’re more likely to remember something you’ve physically written down.

And remember: you don’t have to be ~*~*~aesthetic~*~*~ about this. I bought my grocery pad on Etsy because I’d rather give a small business my money than fluff Walmart, but the only reason the pens are two different colors is because the pen I carry in my purse is black and the ones in my mail caddy aren’t. That’s it, that’s literally the only reason. My calendar is color-coded, but it’s not complicated (red is bills going out, green is money coming in, blue is celebrations and events, brown is my work schedule, gray is non-bill deadlines, and turquoise is anything the roommates are doing that I need to be aware of). And it is making a tangible difference in my life. For the last two and a half months—in other words, since I started doing this—my bills haven’t just been paid on time, they’ve been PREPAID. I have the payment in BEFORE IT’S DUE. I’m more cognizant of what I have, what I need to save, and what I need to spend. This coming month is Pesach and my Pesach cleaning is going on there so I can get it all done correctly and timely. The calendar hangs on my tea cupboard so I have to look at it every day and the grocery list is right next to it.

This may not work for you. But pick one thing—a shopping list is an easy one to start with—and try it, just for a month. You might be stunned by how much it changes for you.

I certainly was.

[emthimofnight]

I love Stellar! She's so cute! Love your art, keep being amazing, et cetera, but also I have a question:

You mentioned that at the time of Stellar's, shall we say, adoption, Shadow and Sonic were still in their "it's complicated" rivals era. I'm guessing Shadow wasn't especially close to Sonic's friends either? And that kinda got me wondering: how do Sonic's friends feel about Stellar when she first arrives? Obviously they love her on sight, but like, does Tails feel weird that he's now basically Shadow's brother-in-law? Is Amy a little alarmed at the thought of Sonic and Shadow being responsible for a literal baby? Does Rogue foresee the inevitable Sonadow to follow? And so on ...

Idk, would love to know more about the early days and everyone's reactions.

EEEHEHEH thank you so much for the compliment!!! 🥰🥰🥰

And I'll give you a quick rundown on everyone's feelings immediately after Shadow brought Stellar home!

Rouge was the first to know, as she was actually present when Shadow discovered Stellar. The two of them had been tracking some leads about Project Stellar for a while, not realizing they were stumbling upon another attempt at Project Shadow until they were right on top of it. Rouge initially tried to reason with Shadow, recognizing his anger instantly and trying to convince him to let cooler heads prevail. She even tried to warn him against removing Stellar from her stasis pod, fearing that it was acting as some kind of life support and would kill her upon removal. Shadow decided to remove her regardless, deciding that either way, a life in the government's hands as a weapon was no life at all. Still, Rouge convinced him to take her straight to Sonic—and, more importantly—Tails, since he had the tools at his disposal to give Stellar a proper look over.

Sonic and Tails live together, so they were the next in line to find out. Shadow basically showed up looking like he was out for blood with a baby in his arms, demanding that Tails use his equipment to see if she was okay. Tails and Sonic both wanted more of an explanation (like, where did you get a baby, WHY do you have a baby, why do you look like you just got out of a fight, etc) and Shadow would begrudgingly tell them what he'd learned, clearly deeply uncomfortable with the entire conversation.

Well, to say they would both be shocked would be an understatement. Sonic would be at a loss for words, for once. Tails, ever the scientist, would immediately want to look over Stellar to see if Shadow was telling the truth. By the time Shadow had handed the baby over to Tails, Sonic's brain would have rebooted and the motor mouth would start up again.

He'd be in total disbelief, really. He'd just start yammering on about every question and concern that would come to mind.

"The government tried to make another you?? With ME?"

"Does that make me a dad? Does that make YOU a dad?? ARE WE DADS??"

"I can't take care of a baby, I don't even remember BEING a baby! What do babies even eat??"

Etcetera, etcetera. Shadow would just stand stiffly in a corner of Tails's workshop, laser focused on whatever tests Tails would be running on tiny baby Stellar. He would totally tune Sonic out, instead focusing on the barely noticeable rise and fall of Stellar's chest, petrified that she might stop breathing if he looked away.

Honestly, the first night would be VERY tense. Shadow would still be high strung from the rescue, Sonic would be trying to wrap his head around the whole idea, and Tails would be devoted to running all the tests he could on Stellar to try and get some answers.

Tails would determine she was healthy, showed no signs of requiring any kind of life support, and was definitely Shadow and Sonic's biological child. Half Shadow's DNA, half Sonic's.

He would also realize in his tests that her energy readings were off the charts. Whatever they had been cooking up in that lab wasn't good, and Stellar was almost like a living chaos emerald. He'd immediately be concerned about the implications of keeping her around, but Sonic would have come around by that point, deciding there was no way he and Shadow would be getting rid of her.

Shadow wouldn't be so sure. He'd suggest talking to Rouge, Amy, or Vanilla about being a mother to her instead, since he wouldn't be confident in his own abilities to raise a child. Sonic would be annoyed by that, pointing out that it would be pretty messed up to try and pass her off on anyone else. Vanilla and Rouge both have their own kids to worry about, and Amy lives in the Sol Dimension with Blaze most of the time. He'd reason that they should at least try. Besides, who could possibly understand her more than Shadow?

Eventually, they'd agree to try raising her as a team. It'd be a begrudging decision, but one they'd learn to live with. The two of them wouldn't be romantically involved at this point, either, so the two of them had a LOT of growing pains trying to figure out how to parent together. Getting a baby government assigned to you is one thing, but having to raise it with your rival is another!

Oh, and as for Amy, Knuckles, and the rest of the group? They'd almost all be horrified LOL! Stellar definitely received a rocky reception at first! They all grew to love her eventually, though.

#answered asks #sonic the hedgehog #stellar the hedgehog #sonadow #shadow the hedgehog #shadonic #shadow #sonic #emthim rambles #rouge the bat #knuckles the echidna #miles tails prower #tails the fox #amy the hedgehog #amy rose #blaze the cat #blazamy #knuxouge #fan kid #fan child #sonadow fanchild #this got long sorry #lore dump

[fangirleaconmigo]

Abortion in The Witcher Books

Would anyone like to come along with me on a deep dive regarding abortion in The Witcher books? Not enough people talk about the fact that Geralt of Rivia is explicitly pro-choice and that the sorceresses are seen providing reproductive care, including abortion, on multiple occasions. So, let's do that.

There are a lot of things you can say about The Witcher books, feminism, misogyny, and the male gaze. (I am considering doing my first video on this very topic. It is complicated. This is not a 'the books are perfect' post) But one thing we can never say is that they are wishy washy about bodily autonomy, and more specifically, abortion. (In fact, that is the entire point of Ciri and Geralt's arc, which I will get to at the end of the post)

This topic came up awhile back because a 'witcher school' was closed after the owners were found to have ties to far right organizations, including anti-abortion organizations. So, I did a little thread on twitter about it, wondering how you can call yourself a Witcher fan (to the extent that you license a fan activity business!), and miss the entire fucking point. It was my most popular (and ofc hated by others) tweet ever, which was interesting, but I was mostly surprised that so many people were shocked to learn that Geralt of Rivia is, as a character, canonically, verbally, explicitly pro-abortion rights.

So I’m going to put the info here too in case any of you here find it interesting. Obviously there will be spoilers for the books.

TW: discussion of sexual assault, pregnancy, and basically anything having to do with reproductive health.

Before I start, I want to say that the book refers to abortion in reference to rights for women throughout, so that is the language in this article. I want to be clear that I (as an individual) understand that abortion is relevant to other genders and that I support it for trans men, non binary people, literally anyone. Abortion should be safe and on demand for all. But this is not a post analyzing my views on abortion, but the appearance of abortion in fictional psuedo medieval-esque fantasy world of The Witcher books.

Ok, I’ll start with the fact that sorceresses provide reproductive care in the books, including abortions.

In, The Last Wish (p210) Geralt tries to give Nenneke money to help Yen with fertility treatments. (In the books he does not mock her desire to have a child) He knows Yen wants to be a mother, and he wants to help. Nenneke replies that she does not need his money, and that providing abortions pays a hell of a lot better than witchering.

"You're more of an idiot than I thought." Nenneke picked up the basket from the ground. "A costly treatment? Help? Geralt, these jewels of yours are, to her, knickknacks not worth spitting on. Do you know how much Yennefer can earn for getting rid of an unwanted pregnancy for a great lady?"

Witches as providers of abortion is a very common trope in fantasy fiction for a very good reason. In order to stamp out paganism and polytheism, European colonists vilified the village wise woman as a murderer of children, hence the 'boil them in a pot, stuff them in the oven' stories about witches. Many people interpret this as the vilification of abortion. In the classic 1972 feminist text Witches, Midwives, and Nurses: A History of Women Healers, Ehrenreich and English quote Malleus Maleficarum, the witch hunting manual written by Catholic clergymen in 1487, to show that women providing reproductive healthcare was one of the 'characteristics' of a witch.

The witch that provides reproductive healthcare fits in very well in the witcher world, where Geralt and the witchers are embodiments of the working class who are used as tools and exploited. They are loathed until they are needed. The same is true of abortion providers. They are hated until they are needed, and they are always needed.

It also fits in well with the themes of class. In the Witcher books, it is stated multiple times that it is upper class women who are accessing this care from sorceresses. That is real. It is the truth that outlawing something very very often only means outlawing it for the poor and working class. The wealthy always find a way.

In Season of Storms, the sorceress Coral and her assistant Mozaïk provide reproductive healthcare to "wealthy, upper-class ladies" on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays. Geralt comes to speak to Coral in chapter sixteen and both of the women are wearing white doctor coats. They have just helped a woman deliver a baby and it is implied that the baby died and they are both upset. They do not want Geralt there, because (it seems to me) they need space to grieve, and they do not expect him to understand. They send send him away, suggesting he go spend time with Dandelion.

She walked over and kissed him on the cheek without a word. Her lips were cold. And she had dark circles under her eyes.

She smelled of medicine. And the fluid she used as disinfectant. It was a nasty, morbid scent. A scent full of fear.

"I'll see you tomorrow," she forestalled him...She looked at him and it was a faraway look, from beyond a chasm of time and events between them. He needed a few seconds to understand how deep that chasm was and how remote were the events separating them.

"Maybe the day after tomorrow would be better. Go to town. Meet that poet, he's been worried about you. But now go, please. I have to see a patient."

After she had gone, he glanced at Mozaïk....

"We had a birth this morning," she said, and her voice was a little different. "A difficult one. She decided to use forceps. And everything that could have gone badly did."

"I understand."

"I doubt it."

"Goodbye Mozaïk."

There are multiple other references to abortion in relation to sorceresses; I won't quote them all. But I'll leave you with one other reference. In Lady of the Lake (pp114), in a very funny moment, Angoulême says she has a 'small problem' and Fringilla replies:

"I understand," nodded the sorceress. "It's nothing dreadful. When was your last period?"

Angoulême is rather put out at the thought of being pregnant.

"What do you mean?" Angoulême leaped to her feet, frightening the chickens. "It's nothing of the sort. It's something completely different!"

So, sorceresses provide abortions and other reproductive care.

But what about the men? What about the heroes?

Well, several of the male protagonists state explicitly in no uncertain terms that abortion is an inalienable, sacred right. That includes Geralt himself.

Here is Geralt taking to Queen Calanthe in Sword of Destiny (p345). She asks him whether he hates his mother. In the course of his answer, Geralt says that abortion is “a choice which should be respected, for it is the holy and irrefutable right of every woman.”

"A choice. A choice which should be respected, for it is the holy and irrefutable right of every woman."

That’s a strong goddamn statement. There’s no doubting his meaning or the strength of his conviction. And it isn’t just Geralt. Dandelion (Jaskier), Cahir (he is traveling with Geralt as part of the hansa in the books, please set aside anything you think you know about him from TWN), and Regis (Geralts dear friend) all explicitly support abortion rights, quite passionately.

In Baptism of Fire (p317), one of Geralt’s dear friends (my favorite, the love of my life, Milva) shares that she is pregnant. They are on a brutal journey through a war zone looking for Ciri. So it’s complicated. Another friend, barber surgeon vampire Regis has prepared an elixir for her to induce an abortion. So, not only do sorceresses provide abortions, but so do vampire barber surgeons, one of the most lovable heroic characters in the books.

But before he administers it, Regis gathers the rest of the company. Regis knows Milva feels like shit at the prospect of burdening them, so he is worried that she is making the decision under duress. They don’t immediately understand why he is bringing the matter to them.

At first they think he is asking for opinions on whether she should get an abortion. They are baffled. Cahir answers first. He says in Nilfgaard it is always a woman’s right to choose.

"In Nilfgaard," Cahir said, blushing and lowering his head, "the woman decides. No one has the right to influence her decision. Regis said that Milva is certain she wants the medicament. Only for that reason, absolutely only for that reason, have I begun-in spite of myself-to think of it as an established fact. And to think about the consequences. But I'm a foreigner, who doesn't know...I ought not to get involved. I apologize."

So, Cahir says that maybe it’s a foreigner thing. Maybe it’s different for them. Dandelion (Jaskier) is offended and outraged by the implication that they believe any differently.

"What for?" the troubadour asked, surprised. "Do you think we're savages, Nilfgaardian? Primitive tribes, obeying some sort of shamanic taboo? It's obvious that only the woman can make a decision like that. It's her inalienable right. If Milva decides to--"

At this point, Geralt cuts Dandelion off. Geralt alone actually understands that there is something else happening here, that they are misunderstanding Regis and further questions are in order. Geralt begs Dandelion to stfu, which the bard misinterprets. He thinks Geralt is disagreeing with him and is considering opposing Milva's right to choose. Dandelion LOSES HIS TEMPER at the thought that Geralt would deny Milva her right.

Geralt becomes even more irritated and angry at the implication that he would do such a thing.

So, not only do we have witches as abortionists in The Witcher books, we have men, the hero (Geralt) his best friend (Dandelion), my beloved Regis, and Cahir say explicitly that abortion is an inalienable right.

And that should be no surprise.

Bodily autonomy and reproductive rights is at the very heart of the story. You do not have The Witcher story without it. It drives the narrative, the conflict, and Geralt and Yen's character arcs.

There is a criticism I see floating around quite a bit, that having Yen's story driven by her desire to be a mom and to physically reproduce is anti-feminist, or at least a tired reductive trope of women being defined by their maternal instincts.

I get that. I get tired of womanhood being defined by reproduction and motherhood as well. Biological essentialism when it comes to gender is exhausting and regressive. However, in this context, it is entirely clear to me that the point is NOT that all women should want to be pregnant. The point is the bodily autonomy, to be pregnant if you want to, and to not be pregnant if you don't want to.

Look at Ciri. She essentially becomes the main character by the end, and the idea of being pregnant repulses her.

So, in Lady of the Lake, Ciri is being held captive by elves, who want to do the same thing to her that everyone else does--breed her. The deal they offer her is, she does not 'have' to have sex with anyone until she is impregnated, but if she doesn't, she can't leave. (So, if she is to access what every human wants--freedom--she has to. This is still rape. It is coerced sex) She is understandably distraught and enraged. The part of that deal she seems most disgusted by, is the idea that she could be pregnant.

"But I don't want to!" yelled Ciri so loudly that the mare skittered beneath her. "I don't want to, understand? I don't want to! The thought of a bloody parasite being implanted in me is sickening. I feel nauseous when I think the parasite will grow inside me, that--"

She broke off, seeing the faces of the elf-women.

So yes, she is distraught that her bodily autonomy is being taken from her yet again. But perhaps the most upsetting part is the idea that she could be pregnant. It physically repulses her.

Now. Let's put this in context.

In this psuedo-medieval-esque setting with royal families, being used as a brood mare is COMMON and ACCEPTED. IN FACT, Calanthe, Ciri's OWN GRANDMOTHER was marrying her off against her will, betrothing her as a child. No one thought this was weird. It's your duty, right? No big deal. Even Geralt, when he first met Ciri, thought it would be a better life for her. Sure, it's against her will. But it's physically safe and luxurious. And he leaves her behind in Brokilon.

But at some point, Geralt puts two and two together. He connects his trauma with hers. He makes a decision that even if almost no one around him in his culture or on the continent, sees the importance of her bodily autonomy or agrees with him, he's protecting her. Not just against death, but against anyone taking her choice from her. When he is having a mental breakdown in Brokilon, worried about her, he tells Dandelion that he is trying to protect her from what happened to him. He doesn't say, she can't die. Or I can't let her be killed. He says she cannot be alone. She cannot go through what I went through. Here, I"ll let him say it: (Time of Contempt, p240)

"Listen to what?" shouted the Witcher, before his voice suddenly faltered. "I can't leave---I can't just leave her to her fate. She's completely alone...She cannot be left alone, Dandelion. You'll never understand that. No one will ever understand that, but I know. If she remains alone, the same thing will happen to her as once happened to me...You'll never understand that..."

"I do understand. Which is why I'm coming with you."

Honestly, I tear up thinking about it.

And Yen, well, she has a similar arc.

Yen has been abused and used as a tool, and along the way she has accepted that this is the way things are. Yen has even done the same to others. But she looked into that little face, those wide green eyes, and at some point she also connected the dots. There's another way of doing things, and maybe it is possible for a little girl to choose for herself. And even if it isn't possible, maybe the important thing is to fight for it. Maybe Yen can give her whole life to let a child just be a child.

Yen goes through torture and imprisonment for Ciri. She shoots lightning at a god, she shouts at a goddess, she drops through a portal into the sea, she gives up every last shred of political power she has spend ninety years accruing, she WILLINGLY tries to give her own life MULTIPLES TIMES, to save Ciri.

And from what? Death? Not always. At the heart of all this sacrifice is that Yen has made a decision that Ciri gets be a human who is given the dignity and respect of deciding what to do with her own body. To be a kid, not a tool. To be a person. To be free.

So Ciri gets to say, actually, for me, the idea of pregnancy is terrifying and repulsive and therefore, I don't want to do it.

In the end, Geralt, a person whose body was tortured and experimented on before he was too young to consent, and Yen, a woman who was abused and used, and BOTH of whom had their reproductive rights taken from them, decide to love Ciri and protect her bodily autonomy at any and all costs.

That is what drives the story. It drives the narrative. It drives both Geralt and Yen's character arcs. It is, in fact, the entire point.

So it should not be a surprise that abortion, and the right to have an abortion if necessary, is an inextricable part of The Witcher world. No, you cannot analyze these books and find 'perfect politics'. They are not politically correct. And there are many parts I can critique. I mean, we can critique anything. (and I do)

But I find it endlessly interesting that people who are conservative or right wing think that this property 'belongs' to them, and they want to push everyone else out, when all they have to do is pay the most minimal amount of attention and have really only two (2) brain cells to rub together, to see that they are indeed, incorrect.

#the witcher #the witcher books #thinking about the witcher books yet again #thinking about geralt of rivia yet again #thinking about yennefer of vengerberg yet again #thinking about ciri yet again #feminism #abortion

[autisticwriterblog]

Izzy, Ed and abuse

okay, so I’ve seen a few people talking about Izzy and Ed, and it genuinely disturbs me that I’ve seen people deny that Izzy is a victim of abuse. By most definitions, physical abuse is categorised as causing physical harm to another person’s body with intent to hurt them. Some things, like punching Izzy for selling Stede out, or choking him for saying hateful stuff when Ed was at his lowest, whilst not acceptable in the real world, are perfectly normal reactions for a pirate to have toward a member of his crew, so I’m not talking about things like that.

But the toe scene and the early parts of season 2 are clearly abusive, and only by sheer character bias (framing Ed as someone who could never do anything wrong) can you look at the way Ed treats Izzy and not consider Izzy a victim. Izzy and Ed have had a mutually toxic relationship for a long time, judging by their interactions, but I personally only see abusive behaviour starting with the toe scene. And the abusive one is Ed. Which shouldn’t be a controversial thing to say, considering what we see on screen, and yet…

Even at the end of season one, we saw Ed cut Izzy’s toe off and force him to eat it, and it is confirmed in season 2 that he took two more toes. He is even about to take a fourth toe when Izzy reports that the crew refused to throw their treasure overboard, and Izzy doesn’t argue, much unlike in season 1, when he often bitched at Ed for his decisions. Now, Izzy just takes the punishment.

Things between them come to a head when Ed shoots Izzy in the leg, leading to infection, and the amputation of his leg. He even puts a gun in Izzy’s hand, directly leading to Izzy’s suicide attempt. And in the end, all Izzy gets is a mumbled apology and that's that.

I know many people don’t like Izzy, but do they not sympathise with him? I’ll be first to admit that I don’t like Ed and Stede (I used to, but season 2 made me dislike them more and more for reasons too complicated to go into now), but I feel bad for them when bad things happen to them. I got bullied as a child, so I sympathise with Stede in the flashbacks to his childhood, and I was horrified when I learned what Ed's father was like. I don't particularly like either of them, but I feel bad for them when they're suffering. Which is why I found it so strange and appalling that people who dislike Izzy seemed to find it funny when Izzy was crawling along the floor, or died a painful death.

Even ignoring Ed's treatment of Izzy, the way he treats the crew is abusive too. He overworks them, pushing them into three months of consecutive raids (assuming they did one raid a day), leaving them all so stressed that Fang seems to always be crying. He forces Jim and Archie to fight to the death for no reason other than he said so. He expects Frenchie to kill Izzy, and it is clear how terrified Frenchie is the entire time he lies to Ed. The whole crew walk on eggshells around Ed because they don't know when he'll explode again. Basically, even if Izzy isn't being mentioned (and he should for the record, because he got the worst treatment - and he didn't deserve it, despite that some people seem to think being mutilated is a fair punishment for yelling at Ed), Ed was still abusive towards the crew. During that time period, Ed is incredibly unstable. He wants the world to burn and doesn't care who gets hurt along with him. Which is why the crew still show signs of trauma after Stede returns. Because they are traumatised by Ed's behaviour.

I know that Ed is a victim of abuse, and I have seen people bring this up when his abusive behaviour is mentioned. The thing is, it's perfectly possible for a victim to become an abuser themself, because they're a human being and are capable of doing bad things. Yes, survivors don't have to become abusive (see: my mum, who was smacked as a child but never raised a hand to her own children, because she didn't turn out like her parents), but it can happen. And that is what happened with Ed. There is even a direct parallel between Ed's dad throwing a plate against the wall, scaring Ed's mother, and the scene where Ed throws a chair against the wall, making Stede visibly flinched. If you want someone to be annoyed with about this comparison, don't pick the fans who are just noticing something in canon - blame the show for writing Ed doing the same thing his abusive father did.

In conclusion, Izzy fans aren't just making things up. We're pointing out things that canon showed onscreen and how Ed's behaviour toward Izzy is abusive. I wanted to like Ed this season, but the way the show wrote him made it impossible for me to tolerate him, because he treated everyone badly and they were expected to just move on. I understand that Ed is a romantic lead, but perhaps it wasn't a good idea to make your romantic lead act so abusive toward his subordinates and then never show any real consequences of that.

#ofmd #ofmd s2 spoilers #izzy hands #the izcourse #ofmd critical #abuse tw #child abuse mention #discourse #fandom wank #ed teach critical #(although it's more about the show's writing than his character)

[lightwise]

Project Necromancer

Alright, I think we all get the gist of what's going on with Project Necromancer, the cloning efforts on Tantiss, why Omega's blood is so important, and how it all ties in to the Mandoverse and Palpatine's return in the Rise of Skywalker. But, I wanted to make a bit of a reference post with posts I've seen going into detail on each aspect of this and also combining some screenshots.

Necromancer is Palpatine's goal all along, to create endless bodies for himself that he can transfer his life force and Force sensitivity into, so that he never dies and can rule forever. And he is starting those ambitions in The Bad Batch. Unfortunately for him, transferring Force sensitivity successfully to another body long term is almost impossible, which has led to this same project, and the exact same efforts, STILL being just out of reach by the time of The Mandalorian, which is after he has supposedly been killed off by Vader in RoTJ.

Now, the specimens are not actually the clones. The clones are the receivers, the experiments. The donors are yet to be revealed, but I would bet a lot of money that they are using the bodies of the Jedi killed in Order 66 (maybe some captured younglings as well--potentially Grogu?) As the M-count donors. This seems to be confirmed by the similar amber pods seen in the Inquisitorius in Kenobi.

However, they are obviously having difficulty, and we know that Nala Se has sworn that this might be impossible, mostly to protect Omega, who as we learn, has already successfully (accidentally or on purpose we don't know yet) shown to have this capability to receive midichlorian-saturated blood without decay or complication.

So, we know that Hemlock now knows that Omega is actually the key to this project. And we know that Palpatine does eventually succeed in cloning himself. However, what happens in between now and then? Something is going to happen this season that sets back this project, or Palpatine would have completed it long before the Original Trilogy, AND they wouldn't be scrounging for scraps and trying to recreate the results by hunting down Grogu in The Mandalorian, a full 25 years after TBB. (Is Pershing already involved in this effort? When and why did Pershing get caught up in Moff Gideon's schemes, and how did those branch off from Palpatine's efforts?)

Finally, in Rogue One, Jyn Erso mentions a Mark Omega Imperial project that was housed alongside Project Stardust (which was begun around the same time as TBB), and Krennic has appeared in TBB and is already working for the Empire. Is it possible that Omega's name is the aspect of the project being referenced here? If so, is she captured again and experimented on? Will her blood end up being used to help further Palpatine's goals? And how much will the clones be able to succeed and push back this project by the end of the season?

#star wars #the bad batch #tbb #the mandalorian #the kenobi show #rogue one #mark omega #project necromancer #palpatine #the rise of skywalker #palpatine returns #cloning #omega bad batch #tbb omega #midichlorians #mount tantiss #doctor hemlock #doctor pershing #omega #the bad batch season 3 #tbb season 3 #tbb spoilers #the bad batch spoilers #tbb season 3 spoilers #the bad batch season 3 spoilers #tbb s3 #tbb s3 spoilers #bad batch s3 #somelightramblings #some light ramblings

[rayshippouuchiha]

I remembered your idea about Grimmjow mentoring Izuku and I have world building/background.

Grimm got to the bnha universe because some idiots were trying to summon a demon to kill some heroes and since there aren't any in universe the magic spell outsourced. The idiots did not survive their stupidity. Grimm is really annoying because he's pretty sure it's going to take at least a year to get home.

Finding and starting to teach Izuku delayed his plans, but not by too much. Grim figures he'll just wait for the kid to die and bring Izuku's soul back with him. Classic Arrancar adoption tactics.

Inko is a little uncomfortable with a demon adopting her son with a plan of making him another demon, but honestly Izuku's just so happy these days that she's cool with it. She does the paperwork to make Grim a distant relative.

People in the bnha universe don't really have reiatsu but they still have souls. Grim just has to teach izuku to reform his soul so it's bleach style instead. He's pretty sure that any of the many mad scientists he knows would tell him it's impossible, but izuka did it anyways so there.

For paperwork they claim that it's a family inherited work that is super finicky and requires a lot of control and often doesn't activate without life or death danger or knowing how to activate it beforehand. Which it is true, using reiatsu for stuff more complicated than "be stronger and hardier," let alone kidou, takes decades of learning. Even if hollow style kidou is easier to learn, it's not by that much. Grim mostly focuses Izuku on learning the basics of combat and maybe sonido.

Izuku ends up good at kicking people in the face like canon, but he also has throwing knives and a tanto to complete the danger gremlin evolution.

He kicks Bakugou in the face and breaks his nose. Their relationship isn't great but it's not as awful as in cannon.

Grimmjow is setting up connections with the villain community one day when he hears about some mysterious, powerful fucker called All For One. He hasn't eaten in a while, and that seems like someone no one will miss so he eats out for the day. The villain underground immediately falls into chaos but that isn't his problem.

Coincidentally, Inko's deadbeat husband finally stopped sending money. (Whether he's AfO or just some asshole who died in the chaos is up to you.) She shrugs and moves on. She saved and invested most money he gave them anyways.

Grim ends up running a dojo. First he just needs space to teach Izuku but I firmly believe that despite his general misanthropic tendencies he actually likes kids, so the whole thing balloons pretty fast. He ends up with this weird teenager who calls himself Dabi as an assistant, since the kid already knew how to fight pretty well.

With an actual support system Dabi ends up significantly less burned and significantly more sane. He works as a vigilante, killing marital and child abusers. He's really uncertain about what to do about Endeavor, because he wants to kill him but the man also scares the shit out of him, and he doesn't want to free his siblings just to put them in the spotlight. Grimmjow is less than zero help, but Inko gives him a big hug and helps him start to set up a legal case if that's what he decides to do. He's like Izuku's weird, obnoxious older cousin.

Speaking of the lov, Kurogiri got out and took Shigaraki with him when AfO died. They end up picking up the rest of the league overtime. All the kids try to convince Kurogiri to reach back out to his friends from when he was Oboro. They might or might not be vigilantes.

What are you talking about, this isn't a fix it fic.

The UA staff are deeply baffled when they meet Izuku's guardians: the sweetest little lady you ever did meet and what Aizawa is pretty sure is an actual, literal demon from hell. In hindsight, though, it makes sense.

Thank you for the idea! Sorry for shoving this thing in your inbox.

Never apologize because this is fantastic.

#RayRambles #BnHA #MHA #Bleach

[dnalt-d2]

So we've got a new update on the Admin Situation, and this one's…A little complicated, to say the least.

Basically, Quackity has stated that he is opening the server tomorrow to welcome the new Korean Creators, but for the time being, there will be no NPCs, including the Eggs. He's also temporarily laid off nearly, if not all the workers he has, including the people doing the Twitter Updates.

And apparently many of them found this out through the stream, much like we did. This seems to be the biggest point of contention for many people, and I'll admit I'm not happy about it either. The only justification I can think of for this is that he didn't want people to find this all out second-hand from people who potentially don't have the all the information. But even with that, I think they should have been made aware before us, even if it was just by a few minutes. That wouldn't have been ideal either, but it would've been better than not knowing at all

The person who brought this forward initially, Lea, has stated that she knows for sure that "Jay" (The person who made the unauthorized update before) was fired, but to her knowledge, some of the other Admins who caused the problems are still employed. I think this might be one of those things that she doesn't have the full scope of information on, since we were also just informed that pretty much all the Admins aren't currently employed. We do have to keep in mind that she's getting this information from someone else who is apparently still in contact with the team. However, it's obvious that even some of the Admins who weren't initially fired aren't entirely in the loop, which means she wouldn't have been getting all the information either. So I think we need to take some of the things she says moving forward with a grain of salt

I'm not saying she's lying by any means, but when you have limited information to work with, playing a game of telephone to get that information isn't always gonna be that reliable

On top of all that, a lot of people seem to be in agreement that Quackity may have implied that money was being embezzled from him and Quackity Studios. I'm not going to say much on that, since it's TECHNICALLY speculation. However I will at least say that it doesn't seem entirely out of the question, and I wouldn't be even slightly surprised to learn that this was the case

Regardless of how it happened, there was a loss of funds, and this loss of funds means that the server has to start slower than before. Hence the absence of the NPCs on the server, and the current stop on Twitter Updates. It sounded to me like he's planning on bringing people back slowly, making sure they're paid for their roles from here on out. And as the financial situation stabilizes, we'll likely see more Admins return to their roles

I want to believe as of now that things are improving. If they weren't, I believe we would have heard about it by now, from the other Admins. We've already seen an Admins in charge of one of the Twitter Accounts say something, and I'm sure we'll get more news like that soon. But we would have DEFINITELY heard if absolutely nothing was going on. I don't think it's fair for the Admins to have not been notified beforehand, and I think that should be the next problem to fix for sure. But the way I see it, what's happening now is a step in the right direction. It's only the first of many, and not even necessarily a big step, but it's a step nonetheless

Once again, I want to remind people that we aren't going to see these changes being made until we're shown them. People can try to tell us what they know as they find it out themselves, but for all we know, they're only showing the bad parts of what's going on. We should really take any future information, good or bad, with a grain of salt as well. It's easy to say things are getting better or worse, but I think we should wait until we see the changes for ourselves and go from there

(I also wanna say that I've seen speculation from a few people, mostly on Twitter, that "Jay" is probably just Quackity trying to cover his tracks and make a scapegoat for what's happening. But with the information we have, that seems incredibly unlikely. Lea didn't know who he was when he first made his unofficial statement, but her recent tweets imply that she knows who he is now. And considering that she's the one who brought all this up to begin with, I HIGHLY doubt she'd keep quiet if he was actually Quackity)

So now, again, all we can do is wait, and continue giving our support to the people who need it. I want to believe that things can get better. I want to believe that Quackity is trying his best to improve things

Try and stay positive, everyone. Even if the server isn't the same as before, we'll be fine. Even if QSMP shuts down entirely, we'll be fine. At the end of the day, people's health and mental health is more important than a Minecraft Server, and if you feel like your mental health is being impacted by what's going on, please take some time for yourself. Worrying constantly over something we have zero control in isn't going to help anyone. If you need to take a step back, please do so. And when you're ready to come back, we'll still be here, even if the QSMP isn't. We've built a great community, and it's been incredibly fun being a part of it. And I sincerely doubt it's going away, regardless of what happens next

So make sure you take care of yourselves

#qsmp #qsmp quackity #quackity #qsmp admin situation

[sluttyten]

Just So You Know

summary: you’re kinda with jeno, but when you realize his best friend jaemin is in love with you too, well it complicates things

length: 20,996 words

tags: friends to lovers, love triangle to polyamory, voyeurism, semi public, sex toys, edging, bondage, blindfolds, anal play, double penetration, threesome mmf, brief mentions of daddy kink

There was a while when you thought Jeno and Jaemin were attached at the hip. You almost never saw them apart from each other, and any time that you did, the other would show up in the same place soon after, drawn together magnetically even when you were somewhere crowded or in public. 

But the first time that you saw Jeno alone, the first time that Jaemin didn’t immediately show up to interrupt, things happen quickly, hormones taking over. You learn that Jeno without Jaemin means that you get fucked quite well, pressed against the back wall of the small shed at the back of the property where they’re filming.

It happens repeatedly. 

Jeno gets you alone or you seek him out, you have sex. It’s easy.

You don’t know if he tells the others, and you don’t care one way or the other. It’s just a casual thing, a quick and easy way to get off between friends.

Until it starts to feel like more. Like when Jeno’s suddenly asking you if you want to get dinner with him. When he’s just kissing you and moans “I love you” in the middle of sex. Then it starts to feel like maybe this isn’t just hooking up anymore. 

And because it feels right, especially in the moment when you’re teetering on the brink of orgasm, you say it too. “I love you, Jeno,” like a stamp, a final seal on what this is.

You don’t label it, even after that. It’s still mostly just sex, sometimes with dinner, sometimes with driving around the city together, staying up late talking on the phone together, hanging out more with his group of friends. You start seeing a lot more of Jaemin, still connected to Jeno at the hip.

Jeno doesn’t call you his anything, and you don’t either. 

Soon, you feel like a trio because even though you’re just doing whatever with Jeno, you spend basically all of your time with him, and by extension, with Jaemin. 

You like Jaemin. He’s nice, but he’s snarky when he needs to be. He’s funny and goofy, but he also gives great deep conversations when the three of you are together but Jeno’s already fallen asleep. Many philosophical, political, world-changing discussions are held over Jeno’s sleeping head. Jaemin is handsome, so handsome that sometimes when you look at him and Jeno while they laugh together over some ages-old inside joke that you’ll never really understand, you think that this makes sense. 

You’re not really sure what this is, just that it feels right. 

Jeno doesn’t set as many boundaries with you while you’re around Jaemin as he does when you’re around others. In public, around most of your other friends, the most he’ll do is put his arm around your shoulders, maybe peck you on the cheek, hold your hand. But when you’re alone together with Jaemin, the three of you hanging out in the apartment or maybe in the backseat of the car, Jeno will hold you in his lap, will draw you in to make out even though Jaemin’s literally sitting right across from you.

It doesn’t seem to bother Jaemin, you realize after a little while. He’ll either make the usual comments like “get a room” or “when’s it my turn” or he’ll sit there and play on his phone, ignoring the two of you until one of you moans or starts to get a little handsier. In which case, Jaemin will usually reach over to smack Jeno’s arm or his ass or his leg or whatever is closest and easiest to hit. 

It gets to the point where you’re pretty much spending the same amount of time with Jaemin as you are with Jeno. The only difference that keeps Jeno in the lead is that Jaemin’s not (usually) around when you have sex.

There was one time, a late, late night of drinking together in the apartment, the three of you in Jeno’s perfectly sized bed. Jaemin was deep asleep, but Jeno was awake and you weren’t quite asleep, and Jeno’s warm hands and his whispered words against your ear had convinced you. Jeno ground his cock inside you from behind, both of you turned on your sides facing away from Jaemin. Jeno’s hand clamped over your mouth, the other on your boobs, and you don’t think you’ve cum that hard ever before, your breath gasping out between his fingers as you cum.

“I love you,” Jeno whispers afterwards, holding your lips to his in a messy kiss. 

“Love you,” you murmur back, turning yourself around in his arms to tuck your face against his chest. 

Things definitely start to change when the three of you take a long weekend trip to Jeju. 

You take a train from Seoul down to the coast, and Jeno’s in a particularly playful mood, constantly throwing himself at you to kiss you or tickle you, and you think it’s something about the late summer heat that has him in this mood, he and Jaemin both goofing around and laughing, Jaemin taking pictures and videos. 

You catch Jaemin filming you a couple times, teasingly whine when he zooms in on your face. Your hands brush against his when you push the phone away, but Jaemin twists his fingers with yours, holding you there while he and Jeno laugh about your sweet pout. 

Eventually, as the day winds on, fading from early to mid-morning, they settle down, seated on either side of you with Jaemin dozing beside the window, watching the scenery pass by. 

Jeno has your hand in his, fingers laced together and resting on his thigh while he scrolls through his phone with his free hand. You’re sharing his AirPods, the relaxing music paired with the warm morning sunlight heating the train car lulls you into a sleepy daze as well.

You wake when the train rolls into the station, Jeno’s music still quietly playing in your left ear as your head rolls on the shoulder beneath your cheek. 

“We’re here.” Jeno says, shaking your shoulder, and you open your eyes, lifting your head. You glance up as Jaemin rolls his shoulder, and you note the way that he’s avoiding your gaze as he reaches for his bag. You really hope you didn’t drool on his shoulder or anything. “Let’s get lunch before we catch the ferry.”

You take a ferry south from Mokpo, and the silliness of the boys continues, though Jeno ends up taking a nap this time, stretched out across the row of seats with his head in your lap while Jaemin sits across from you, looking at the two of you until slowly his gaze rises to yours.

“What?” You ask.

Jaemin shrugs, glancing away, his gaze flicking down to Jeno’s face before he turns to look out at the water. “Just so you know, you talk in your sleep.”

Jaemin’s slept in the same bed as you enough times now that you’re surprised he’s only just now learning this. “I know. Did I say anything embarrassing?”

You reach down, looking down at Jeno’s head in your lap. His cheek twitches a little when you brush your fingers over his smooth skin, lightly flicking a section of hair back from his eyes. You feel a warmth blossom in your chest. When this had started, the first time you told him you loved him, you don’t think you meant it then, but now you do. You love Jeno, even though he’s not your boyfriend, even if he’s still just your whatever.

Jaemin clears his throat, and you look up at him again. He’s looking out at the water, but something in the way that his head is turned tells you that he’s just started looking back out there. “You were talking about bread and making faces like you were eating some. You were cute.”

“Was I?” You watch Jaemin, watch the way that his hand curls against the leg of his jeans, his ears slightly pink. He looks back over at you, and when you smile, his gaze drops down to your lips. You can’t help it when you look at his lips, at how they part and pull into a smile. 

“Jagi,” Jeno’s voice rises from your lap, still half-asleep. His hand covers yours resting in his hair, and he pulls your hand down over his chest, holding it there for the rest of the ferry ride.

You reach Jeju as afternoon turns to evening, the sun sinking towards the sea, casting everything in a warm golden glow as you walk in the shallow waters of the beach near where you’re staying for the night. Jaemin trails behind where you and Jeno splash through the water. He laughs right alongside you both when Jeno grabs you by the waist, lifting you out of the water, spinning you around so Jaemin can catch your ankles.

The three of you laugh, your cries and laughter echoing toward the deepening blue of the eastern sky as they pretend to swing you so they can drop you in the water. Jaemin’s smile fills his whole face, all you can see while they swing you, and even once they’ve released your ankles back to splash in the water, Jeno pulling you up onto your feet, you can only see Jaemin’s face, the way that he’s watching you.

Even when Jeno slides his arms around you and presses his lips to your cheek, holding you in his arms while he turns to look at the last of the sunset, you just keep feeling Jaemin’s gaze on you. 

It’s always amazed you how it never feels like Jaemin’s a third wheel with you and Jeno. How it doesn’t feel like you’re a third wheel either when you’re with the two of them. And that night, as the three of you settle into the hotel room (a king-sized single bed because it’s cheaper than the hotel’s only room left with two beds), you think about how it never really feels like one of you is left out.

You’re balanced together.

You flop into the bed with Jaemin while Jeno finishes up in the shower, and Jaemin’s pretending to be asleep, his arms folded across his chest and his eyes closed. 

“Why are you pretending?” You ask, reaching out, hesitating for only a moment before you poke his cheek. “Jaemin?”

He smiles, his hand darting up to catch yours, and when he pins your hand beneath his against his chest, it’s your heart that starts pounding. This is wrong, the way that your heart beats faster, the way that you look at his lips right now and wonder what it would be like if you just kissed him.

The shower squeals to a stop on the other side of the bathroom door. 

Jaemin doesn’t let go of your hand. He doesn’t look away. He opens his mouth to say something, but before he can speak, the bathroom door opens. Jeno steps out with a towel around his hips, tendrils of steam licking out at the rest of the hotel room. He glances at you and Jaemin then moves toward his bag, dropping his towel without a care in the world when he drags out the sweatpants he’ll be sleeping in.

“Really?” Jaemin asks, and it’s then that he lifts his hand. You leave yours there on his chest for a moment, only pulling it back when Jeno turns fully back around to face the two of you, flashing you and Jaemin his full cock. “I mean, I’ve seen it all, Jeno. Why even put your clothes back on?”

Jeno grins all soft and cute. “If that’s what you want.”

You reach back, pulling out the pillow from behind your head, and you toss it at him. “No, Jeno, just put your clothes on!”

He laughs, catching the pillow, jumping onto the end of the bed to hit you with the pillow, and you retaliate, dragging the pillow out from under Jaemin’s head.

Jaemin just watches as you and Jeno wrestle around together, laughing and struggling with each other, occasionally grunting when a pillow makes contact. He only leaves the bed when Jeno finally pins you, pressing his bare body down against yours and capturing your lips in a kiss.

“I’m gonna shower,” Jaemin says, moving away from the bed, heading for the bathroom. “Please be done with this by the time I’m out.”

And as soon as the door shuts behind him, you and Jeno are moving. Your hands slip down between your body and his, circling his cock with both hands, kissing the moans right from his lips. He tugs at your clothes, pulling them down just enough that he can flip you over and fit his cock inside you.

He fucks you roughly, his hand gathering your hair in a ponytail, his mouth hot on the back of your neck and your shoulders, leaving his mark behind. You’re moaning and gasping, crying out his name as he fucks in deep, and you’re well aware of the fact that Jaemin’s just on the other side of that thin bathroom door. You’d been able to hear the TV almost clearly while you were in there showering, so you imagine he can probably still hear you pretty well.

Somehow the thought of that gets you hotter.

And when Jeno leans in, his lips close to your ear, he says the magic words. “Do you think Jaemin’s listening to us right now? Think he’s in there jerking off, wishing he was still out here?” He thrusts deep, pushing a sweet moan from you, and he stays there, grinding his hips against your ass, trying to hit deeper as he says, “Maybe he wishes he was in here?”

You cum right then without another thought. Your mind blanking out, white-hot pleasure spilling through you, and a moment later Jeno’s fucking you through it, long, hard thrusts before he’s cumming too.

You’re both dressed and curled together beneath the duvet when Jaemin emerges from the bathroom. 

His damp hair curls against his forehead, and when he climbs into the bed on your other side, he smells like Jeno’s eucalyptus body wash. The lights in the room are off, the only illumination coming from Jeno’s phone screen as he searches up what the three of you are going to do tomorrow.

You look at Jaemin as he settles in, as he slides down into the sheets and rests his head on the pillow, rolling onto his side so his back is to the two of you. But one of his hands rests above his head on the pillow, and as Jeno moves his phone around while typing, the brightness of a white screen flashes over Jaemin’s hand and you can make out the clearly defined imprints of teethmarks, like he’d bitten his fist.

“Goodnight, Jaemin,” you say, boldly reaching out to touch his back.

He curls his shoulders a little inward. “Goodnight.”

The following morning, Jeno wakes you with a kiss on the forehead, reaching over you to shake Jaemin awake too. “Come on, we’ve got a busy day.”

“We’re supposed to be relaxing,” Jaemin groans, turning over onto his other side, his face squished against the pillow just inches from yours. His knee nudges against your leg. “Let’s sleep a little longer.” He shifts, getting comfortable again. And then his eyebrows draw together, he tilts his head forward towards you. “You smell like flowers.”

“Is that a bad thing?” You ask. 

“No.” Jaemin’s frown clears. “Flowers are nice.”

“Flowers are nice,” Jeno agrees. “And if you wake up now then maybe we can grab breakfast before we go see some pretty flowers while we hike Hallasan.”

There’s a lot of grumbling from yourself and from Jaemin as Jeno drags you both through the process of getting ready. The three of you stand shoulder to shoulder in the tiny hotel bathroom, all trying to brush your teeth together. Jaemin pouts the whole walk from the hotel to a cafe down the street, complaining that it’s too early and he was sleeping so good. He only gets quiet when Jeno shoves a caffeine-high in a cup into Jaemin’s hands.

The hike is a long one, one that Jeno had been looking into for weeks now, preparing everything that the three of you would need for this day. About a six hour minimum round trip, so he’s lucky that you love him.

Jaemin, buzzing off his caffeine high, is happy about the hike once you all arrive and start out. He’s again filming more on his phone, vlogging this experience though you doubt that the video will ever be edited let alone posted. But you enjoy the energy of the hike with the two guys. 

There’s a couple that passes with a very happy looking dog that you all stop to pet for a few minutes, there are parents with young children who you pass by. The scenery is pretty, your moods are good. Jaemin walks between you and Jeno, his arms thrown over both of your shoulders, trying to film the three of you together.

The energy lasts for a while, but then the climb gets a little steeper. This is where the parents with the young kids start turning back. This is where Jaemin stops filming for a bit, his caffeine starting to wear off as he replaces it all with water. Jeno’s still chipper, encouraging the two of you as you start to lag behind that this is fun.

“I think you need to redefine fun, Jeno,” you pant as you catch up to him at the top of a steep set of rugged stairs. 

“We could’ve just gone to the beach,” Jaemin groans, coming up behind you. “Or I could have stayed at home, and not come along at all.”

But honestly, when you reach the summit shortly after, it’s worth it. The view is amazing on a day as miraculously clear as this, with the entirety of the island laid out beneath your feet, the sea shimmering beneath the sunlight. 

“It’s worth it,” you admit to Jeno. “I’m not going to be able to walk tomorrow, but it was worth it.”

He kisses your cheek. “Yeah, I’ve heard that from you before.”

You push at his arm, glancing in Jaemin’s direction a couple feet away, but either he didn’t hear or he’s pretending not to, too focused on filming the view, panning around until he’s capturing you and Jeno in the frame. You smile, holding your fingers up in a peace sign and waving them. Jeno loops his arm around you, drawing you back against his chest, and both of you laugh. 

Jaemin spins around, holding his phone up and aimed at the three of you now. And you can see yourselves on the screen, and you like the way it looks.

You stay up there at the summit for a bit. It’s somewhat crowded, but Jeno assures you that it’s less crowded now than it normally is according to the photos he’d seen online while doing his research. Jeno and Jaemin lay out a picnic blanket, Jeno uncovering food from his bag, and you stretch out on your back, pillowing your head in Jeno’s lap. 

Jaemin’s on his back too, one hand held up to shield his face from the sun, but it doesn’t stay up there for long. You watch as Jeno reaches over, grabbing Jaemin’s hand, and he holds it for a moment while he talks to the both of you about something that you’re not really listening to because you stopped listening the moment that you laid eyes on Jaemin’s face when Jeno grabbed his hand.

The way that Jaemin lifted his gaze to Jeno’s face, his lips parted in surprise that turns to a smile. You look at the way that he’s looking at Jeno, and something inside you clicks into place.

You don’t say anything for a bit, you hold in your thoughts until the three of you are making your descent, until your legs start to grow tired again and you begin to lag behind. Jeno marches on, but Jaemin slows his pace to help you down a particularly rocky bit of the path. He goes down first, then holds his hand up to you so you can hold on.

And it’s then, when you slide your hand against his, as the heat of his fingers wrap around your hand, you spot the tiniest, faintest marks of what you’d glimpsed the night before. And your thoughts from earlier come tumbling suddenly from your mouth in the form of a question.

Sweeping your thumb exactly over where you’d seen the teethmarks the night before, you ask Jaemin, “Do you think of me?”

His hand jerks in yours, causing you to stumble the last little bit down, and Jaemin automatically wraps his arms around you. His gaze darts around, lingering on the downward path where Jeno’s gone. “I don’t know how to answer that.”

“It’s easy.” You extract yourself from his arms and tug on his hand. “Last night, when you were listening in on Jeno and I, when you came in the shower, biting down on your hand to keep quiet, were you thinking of me?” You watch his face, his expression shifting slightly, but he doesn’t answer, so you offer a follow-up question, “Or thinking of him, maybe?”

Now Jaemin pulls his hand free. “Why are you asking me this?”

You stare at him, waiting. “Am I wrong? Is that not what happened last night?”

Jaemin looks at you then back down the path. “What do you want me to say? Yes, the two of you were noisy, I jerked off. What’s the big deal?” He turns back to you, his gaze first lands on yours before falling to your lips. “And I was thinking of both of you. Just, like, what it would be like to be watching.”

“Like if you hadn’t gotten out of bed?” You ask.

Jaemin nods slowly. “Yeah.”

“Does Jeno know?” You ask, and you slide your hand up one of his arms. The words Jeno spoke to you last night to get you to cum echo in your mind. “Does he know that you think about us?”

“He would kill me if he thought I wanted to take you from him,” Jaemin quickly says, pulling his arm away from your hand. Once again, he looks down the path, making sure that he can’t see Jeno before he says, “He’s possessive of you, in case you’re not aware, and I like you, okay? So, no, my best friend doesn’t know that I am in love with his girlfriend.”

He fully turns away from you now, starting to continue his descent.

“Jaemin, wait!” You call, hurrying to catch up, but before you can do so, there’s Jeno rounds a bend in the pathway.

“We stopped to rest just a little,” Jaemin explains, tromping down the slope past Jeno. “But we’re good now.”

He’s irritated now, and that settles uncomfortably in your stomach. You didn’t mean to make him angry. You just wanted some answers. Because you’ve seen the way Jaemin looks at you sometimes. And it was similar to how he’d looked at Jeno up at the summit just a little while ago. 

Jeno looks at you, as if hoping for some clarification as to why Jaemin’s suddenly in such a bad mood. You curl your hand around his arm as you pass, tugging him along with you. “I’ll tell you about it on the way down.”

You keep Jaemin within sight, but he doesn’t look back at the pair of you. He doesn’t see as you curl yourself around Jeno’s arm, quietly conferring to him the conversation between you and Jaemin. He doesn’t see the way Jeno squeezes your arm, or the way that he stares after Jaemin too. He doesn’t see the plot forming between you and Jeno, a plan for later tonight.

By the time he does look back at you and Jeno, it’s been probably half an hour or longer that Jaemin’s been silently hiking down the mountain in front of you two. He pauses, waits for you guys to catch up, and then he falls into step on Jeno’s other side, not looking at you.

A few times, you notice Jeno open his mouth as if he’s going to say something, but then he doesn’t, and the rest of the hike passes in thoughtful silence. 

You can’t stop thinking of the look Jaemin had given Jeno at the summit. The look in his eyes when he’d told you that he’s in love with you. And then that sends you down a spiraling thought about how Jaemin had called you Jeno’s girlfriend, but you’re not his girlfriend, are you? You’ve really never discussed a title on this, even though you’re exclusively kissing and fucking and exchanging confessions of love. Is Jeno your boyfriend? Does that mean that Jaemin’s right, and that it doesn’t really matter that he’s in love with you too?

There’s really no speaking at all as the three of you take the bus from the base of the mountain back to the hotel. The weather’s really starting to take a turn as you board the bus, clouds gathering, growing darker. Raindrops start to hit the bus windows as you near the hotel, and as you step off the bus, a growl of thunder rolls through the thickening air. A fat raindrop hits your forehead. 

Jeno takes your hand, his warm and comforting palm pressed against yours as he starts to run with you for the stairs that lead up to your room on the second floor. You hear Jaemin’s feet slapping pavement behind you, metallically pounding up the stairs, splashing through a large puddle that’s gathered on the balcony.

The roof overhangs the balcony to provide a little protection to the doors of the hotel rooms, but it’s not quite enough as the rain starts to fall harder, soaking through your shirt almost entirely by the time that the three of you reach your room at the end of the balcony. Your clothes stick to your back as you wait for Jeno to shove the key into the lock, jamming the door open with some careful pressure with his shoulder, and all three of you tumble quickly into the room. 

Jaemin presses the door shut again, leaning back against it as it thumps back into the frame. He looks up from his feet, catches Jeno’s eye, and both of them start laughing. 

You’re all soaked. Hair plastered to foreheads. Clothes dripping and hanging from your bodies. Your white tshirt has gone nearly transparent, and at the same time that you realize that, it seems that Jaemin does too. His gaze drifts past Jeno, both of them still smiling, and he sees you with your shirt clinging to your chest.

His smile fades and fades until it’s barely there any longer.

Meanwhile, a heat grows inside you at the weight of his gaze on you. 

Jeno turns, noticing the fading expression on his best friend’s face, and when he spots you, understanding dawns in his eyes. You can almost see the moment that something clicks in Jeno’s mind, the words fuck our plan almost clearly written on his face.

He turns back to Jaemin, walking closer to him, and when he grabs him by the shoulders, Jaemin opens his mouth to protest, but Jeno doesn’t allow it.

This room doesn’t have a whole lot in it. There’s the single King-sized bed. A chest of drawers with a TV on it. There’s a pair of nightstands on either side of the headboard, each of them decorated with a lamp. And there’s a single armchair in the room sitting tucked in the corner at the foot of the bed near the bathroom. 

That chair is where Jeno steers Jaemin to.

“Sit. Don’t say anything.” Jeno tells him, pressing down on Jaemin’s shoulders until the other man bends his knees and sinks down into the chair. 

And then Jeno’s back in front of you.  

He meets your eyes, just a quick check with you before he’s edging in to kiss you, first just a soft peck against the corner of your mouth, pulling back and moving back in to kiss you more firmly on the mouth, and then he pulls back again to glance over in Jaemin’s direction before he turns back to you again and this time when he kisses you, it’s a real kiss, a hungry kiss that you open up to, letting him overwhelm you. Jeno tastes like the fruit flavored candies he’d been silently sharing with Jaemin on the bus, and you moan a little, trying to get closer to him, to get a better taste.

Jeno smiles into the kiss, and he reaches for the soaked hem of your shirt and begins to lift it. You hear Jaemin make a sound from his seat in the corner, but you can’t stop kissing Jeno, not for long enough to look over at your personal voyeur. A thrill tingles through your fingertips and down to your toes as you feel Jeno peeling the shirt from your skin, cool air meeting damp skin. You part for only when it’s time for him to lift the shirt up and over your head.

The material falls to the floor with a wet slap and the sound of Jaemin’s quiet gasp.

Finally you look over at him. 

You can see from the look on his face that Jaemin must be thinking that this is some kind of punishment, thinking that you told Jeno about your conversation on the rocks earlier, and this is Jeno’s way of restaking his claim on you and proving to Jaemin that he can’t have you.

And as Jeno sinks to his knees in front of you, kissing down your neck and your chest (lingering there for a moment as his hands slip around your back to unfasten your bra, letting that piece of fabric fall uselessly to the floor as well), he unbuttons your shorts and drags them down, and you can definitely see how Jaemin might view it as Jeno punishing him, but that’s not it at all.

Jeno presses lightly at your hips with his fingertips, and you sink down to sit on the edge of the bed. Jeno’s hands touch your knees, and you part your legs immediately, making room for Jeno to fit between them. 

You look over at Jaemin again. He’s sitting there, hands on his knees, watching. And when you make a brief moment of eye contact, you can tell that he’s trying hard not to stare, but failing epically as his focus drops down to your chest, to your peaked nipples, falling lower again to the sight of Jeno scooting forward and tucking his fingers in the band of your panties to pull them down. 

You watch Jaemin’s face as Jeno does this, as you lift your ass off the bed to let Jeno slide your last article of clothing down your legs. Jaemin glances up to your face, and you try your best to smile at him to nod and let him know that you want him to watch, that this is something that you and Jeno both want. He looks away again quickly, returning to the spread of your legs, Jeno’s face and hands.

A heavy silence weighs the air in the room for a moment as thunder rumbles outside. The tension inside grows. 

You reach for one of Jeno’s hands, and at your brief touch, he looks up to check in with you. You squeeze his hand, tilting your head slightly in Jaemin’s direction, and Jeno follows, glancing over his shoulder toward his best friend.

“Jaeminnie,” Jeno says, his hands skimming up your thighs. “Watch us.”

You can tell that Jaemin’s already hard in his pants, squirming in the chair. But he hasn’t made a single move to get up since Jeno’s hands had pressed down on his shoulders. And judging by the eager way that he’s drinking in the spectacle playing out before him, you don’t think he’s going to leave.

“She told me that you said earlier that you wanted to watch us.” Jeno’s fingers press gently near the apex of your thighs, making you part your legs just a little more. “And just so you know, we both want you to watch us too.”

Last night had been the first time either you or Jeno had brought it up, but you had certainly thought about it before. Maybe not consciously, but you’d had dreams of waking up in Jeno’s bed to morning sex, but when you’d checked it hadn’t been Jeno eating you out. You’d dreamt of getting double-teamed in the backseat of the car. And outside of dreams, you’d had sex in the same bed where Jaemin was sleeping before, and when you’d thought back on that night in the days that followed, some part of you had wished that Jaemin had woken up and caught you.

You weren’t ever sure exactly what you had hoped to come of that if he had woken, but right now, sitting on this hotel bed with Jeno moving closer to your pussy while Jaemin watches, you think you’ve finally figured it out.

Jeno moves up onto the bed with you, positioning himself so he’s not blocking Jaemin’s view as he kisses back up your body, tipping you down to lie beneath him, and he fills you smoothly with his fingers. 

Having Jaemin watching just makes everything better. You’re more aware of the way you react to Jeno’s touches and his kiss, the way you touch him too, the way you both sound. 

And you’re aware too that Jeno’s putting on a little bit of a show, making sure that any move he makes is visible to Jaemin. Anything he says to you, he says it loud enough that Jaemin can hear. He spreads your legs further apart, shifting you so you’re angled more toward Jaemin, so he can better see Jeno’s fingers disappearing inside you while he hears your soft moans.

Each time you look over at Jaemin, his hand gets a little closer to dipping inside his pants until one time you look at him and he’s just stroking himself over the front of his pants. You can’t look away.

“Do you like that?” Jeno asks as he curls his fingers inside you. “Jaeminnie’s so hard for you, jagi. Do you think he wishes he was over here? Wishes it was his fingers inside your cunt? Do you wish I was him?” 

Jeno sits up then, and he does one of your favorite things. He brings one of his hands up to your throat, carefully placing his fingers before lightly beginning to squeeze. Your eyes roll with pleasure, a surge of arousal bursting in your belly, and Jeno starts to fuck you harder with his fingers.

“Do you want Jaeminnie’s cock, jagi? Or is it just enough to have him watch?” Jeno asks, his lips pressed to your cheek, voice just loud enough that you know Jaemin heard, that you know he’s still listening when you let out a choked moan of Yes. “Yes, what?” Jeno asks.

You moan, twisting your hips as he keeps pounding his fingers inside you, and you can feel your orgasm building, rising quickly to your climax as you let your imagination paint a vivid image in your mind of Jaemin leaving that chair in the corner, coming over to join you and Jeno in bed, Jaemin stuffing you with his cock while Jeno chokes you on his. 

“Yes,” you moan again, “I want his cock.”

Your body arches off the bed when you cum, your heart pounding so hard in your chest that you’re almost certain the two men can see it. Jeno’s hand is still around your throat, pinning you down to the bed as your orgasm courses so intensely through you. His fingers work you through your climax.

“That’s too bad,” Jeno’s tone is taunting. “Because you can’t have Jaemin’s cock tonight, sweetheart. You’re mine to have, his to watch.”

His fingers fall from around your throat, and you suck in a strong clear breath. His fingers leave your pussy, and you clench around nothing, a soft whimper starting up as you realize that you’re not done here. You need more.

Jeno moves off the bed, and you and Jaemin both watch him closely as Jeno tugs his shirt off and as he drops his pants. You look over to Jaemin right as his gaze falls down to where Jeno starts stroking himself. You and Jeno both watch as Jaemin finally takes the plunge and slowly pulls his cock out, nervously checking to see how Jeno has reacted.

Jeno had told you before that they had both seen each other’s dicks on numerous occasions, that they’d even seen each other hard a few times. Jeno offers Jaemin’s cock only a cursory glance before he’s turning his back, returning to his place between your legs.

“Do you still want him to watch me fuck you, sweetheart?” Jeno asks, one hand on his cock, the other brushing over your thigh. You know that he’s asking just to make sure that you still feel all good about this. If you said no, Jeno would shut it down, tell Jaemin to leave the two of you alone for a bit. But you also know that when you nod at him, look over at Jaemin and say “yes” that Jeno’s full on board with that too.

Jaemin’s full touching himself now, and your gaze lingers there for a moment, admiring the sight of his cock, his slow strokes, his lips parting in a barely audible gasp when he feels your attention.

It all feels very quick after that. Jeno pressing into you, shifting you a little higher up the bed so he can move up onto it too. Jeno folding his body over yours while you wrap your arms and legs around him. Jaemin gets a full view of Jeno’s ass, his balls, his cock thrusting into your hungry pink pussy. 

Jeno’s rough and quick, and you know that he’s been more aroused by this whole situation than he was letting on. He’s going hard with little regard for you, but you don’t mind because as Jeno buries his cock deep inside you again and again, you’re watching Jaemin stroking his cock, his expression starved and lustful, drinking in everything you and Jeno are giving him.

“Look at me,” Jeno growls, and you feel his hand squeezing your cheeks, turning your gaze back to his face. Your eyes lock on his, and looking deep into Jeno’s eyes all you can see is love, his overwhelming love and desire for you, overflowing as he holds your gaze, his hand on your cheeks, and he thrusts into you, harder, deeper, faster, teetering on the edge of his own orgasm.

“Jeno!” You moan his name, your hands clutching at his back, fingernails digging against his skin. “Fuck, fuck! Jeno!”

Your release is timed almost perfectly with his, his cock pumping his cum deep inside you as your body pulses with pleasure again, pussy clenching around him. 

Jeno leans down, capturing your lips with his, moaning into the kiss as he thrusts a few more times to really finish himself off. 

You almost forget about Jaemin, all swept up in the kiss and the dazed afterglow of your orgasm and the heat and weight of Jeno over you and inside you.

But then you hear a moan from that seat in the corner of the room, and you break the kiss to look over at him.

You watch as Jaemin throws his head back, as his hand massages his cock, as he cums. Creamy white cum leaks down over his fingers, dripping down the length of his cock. You shove down the urge to crawl out from beneath Jeno, to get on all fours on the floor and lick up Jaemin’s cum. That much isn’t something that you and Jeno had discussed. He’d only told you that he was good with Jaemin watching, not actually sharing you with the other man.

So you lie there in bed and tuck away that new fantasy for another day.

Jaemin’s the first to move, getting out of the seat and vanishing into the bathroom. You hear the sink turn on and then back off. Hear clothes hitting the floor, the sound of him stepping into the shower, and turning it on.

Jeno presses his lips softly to your cheek. “I love you,” he butts his head gently against the side of yours, quietly saying, “That... That was good. But I just hope, like, that it doesn’t ruin anything.”

You look over at the bathroom door. It’s cracked open slightly, steam puffing out of the little gap. Absently, you lift your hand to Jeno’s head, combing your fingers through his hair as you whisper back, “What would it ruin?”

Jeno’s quiet for a moment as he moves away from you, lifting himself off of you, pulling out. He stoops down to grab his underwear from the floor, pulling them back up and tossing your panties back to you. He sits down on the bed as you stand up, and once you’ve got your panties back on and a dry tshirt from your bag on, that’s when Jeno finally speaks again. 

“I don’t want it to ruin us.” Jeno’s voice is still quiet, just barely above a whisper, and you know he’s worried about Jaemin overhearing from the shower. “And I don’t mean you and me. I don’t even mean just Jaemin and I. I mean all three of us. I like it when we’re all together. He’s my best friend, and you’re my.... I’m in love with you.”

You notice that quick switch, the continued avoidance of putting a label on this between you and him. You reach for his hand, holding onto it as you stand in front of him.

Jeno looks up at you, he pulls your joined hands up beneath his face, resting his chin on your hand. “I don’t want to lose either one of you. I don’t want things to get weird between us.”

“Jeno,” you sigh, “I like it when we’re all three together too. I’ve always thought that it just feels right.” Jeno nods, holding your gaze, looking up at you and waiting to hear what else you have to say, and it takes a minute for you to take a deep breath and finally muster the courage to put into words what you’ve been feeling all day. “Do you think it would be crazy if we just like opened up a little more, if we kind of just let Jaemin in?”

The room is quiet except for the patter of the shower on the other side of the bathroom door. Jeno has these warm, soft puppy dog eyes that are staring up at you, searching your face, thoughts swirling in the deep brown of his irises. 

“Jeno?” You ask after a moment.

Everything falls quiet. The shower faucet squeaks as Jaemin shuts it off. You can hear the trickle of the water from the showerhead, the sound of it swirling down the drain. You can hear Jaemin stepping out of the shower, the quiet splatter of the shower’s spray dripping off of him. 

Jeno nods. “I think I would be open to that. But not tonight. That might be, uh, too much.”

You agree. Too much, too fast. 

You lean down, pressing a kiss to Jeno’s lips. 

The bathroom door opens, and there’s Jaemin, a towel wrapped around his waist, and he stares as you straighten up. He clears his throat, drops his gaze, moves quietly toward his bag. He returns to the bathroom for just a moment, just long enough to pull his clothes back on, and then he’s passing quickly through the room, shoving his feet back into his shoes, grabbing a jacket from his bag, and he reaches for one of the room keys sitting on the chest of drawers. 

“I’m going out for a walk,” is all the explanation he offers before dragging the door open, and stepping out into the evening drizzle.

You and Jeno shower after that. You redress. By that point the rain has faded away almost entirely, so you walk a few minutes to a restaurant. You eat there, return to the hotel, and the room is still empty with no sign of Jaemin. You change into clothes to sleep in, climb into the bed together, turn on the TV to watch some drama, and you both fall asleep rather quickly.

You’re not really sure what time it is when Jaemin finally returns. The TV is still on, but all the lights in the room are off. Jeno’s deep asleep, halfway hanging off the bed. And you hear a key turning in the door’s lock. You watch through your eyelashes as Jaemin steps in through the door. He takes off his shoes and pauses, looking at the two of you on the bed, the spot still open for him on your other side. 

It must’ve started raining again because his hair is plastered to his forehead again. Jaemin sighs, shrugs out of his jacket, passes through the room to the bathroom. 

When he emerges again, he’s taken off his wet shirt and wet pants. You see him cast in the bluish light of the TV, all of his shadows and highlights as he looks again at the bed, at the spot beside you. You watch as he glances at the chair in the corner, and you can see it as if it’s written clearly on his face that he’s thinking of just curling up to sleep in that chair instead of claiming the spot beside you.

He starts to move for the chair.

“Jaemin,” you yawn, your voice thick with sleep. He jumps a little as he looks back over at you. You lift a hand, holding it out to him. “Come sleep in the bed. Don’t be stupid.” 

He hesitates for a moment longer, but when you make a mildly irritated noise and start to move like you’re about to get up, Jaemin finally takes a step toward the bed, he accepts your offered hand, and you tug lightly so he takes another step closer. 

You close your eyes, yawning again, and while you’re not looking, Jaemin settles into the bed. You take a peek at him, noticing the way that he’s lying straight on his back, staring up at the ceiling.

He’s tense, even in your half-asleep state you can see that. 

But he’s still holding onto your hand, so you take that as a good sign as you shut your eyes and sink back into sleep.

The hotel room is cool when you wake again a few hours later. The air prickles against the bare curve of your shoulder. All is quiet and dark in the room as the TV had shut off at some point, and all you can hear is the breathing of the two men in the room with you, the relaxing sound of the rain still falling outside.

Jeno’s drawn closer to you, curving his body behind yours, his arm curled over your waist. Jaemin’s still holding onto your hand, the back of which rests against his bare chest, and you can feel his heartbeat with each easy rise and fall of his chest.

And when you feel that heartbeat suddenly pick up, you lift your gaze from Jaemin’s chest to his face, and you find his dark eyes already looking at you.

Neither of you say a word. 

You hold his gaze.

Jaemin squeezes your hand lightly, and his eyes soften, reminding you of his confession from the day before. He’s in love with you, and just a few hours ago he’d sat there and witnessed what had probably seemed a display of possessiveness. Jaemin didn’t know about the rest.

He didn’t know about the feelings that were getting involved. He didn’t know about the talk you and Jeno had had about opening up your relationship a little and letting Jaemin settle into a place in this relationship.

You don’t want to speak right now. Breaking the silence feels wrong. So you lift your joined hands from Jaemin’s chest, and he watches as you bring the back of his hand to your lips, pressing a kiss there.

Jaemin squeezes your hand again. He starts to smile before he tamps it down and turns his head away toward the bathroom. 

Behind you, Jeno shifts, inhaling deeply and tucking his face into your hair. 

You know that eventually at some point today, you’re going to have to get out of this bed. You’re going to have to let go of Jaemin’s hand. You’re going to have to leave Jeno’s arms. The three of you are returning to Seoul today, which means another long day of ferry rides and a train journey, and you really don’t want to move.

But Jeno presses his lips to the back of your shoulder. He throws a leg over you, and when his heel hooks against Jaemin’s leg, Jeno sits up to take a look.

“When did you get back?” Jeno asks.

“Late last night,” Jaemin yawns, and when he moves to cover his mouth with his hand, he realizes that his hand is still held in yours. You feel him jerk, trying to slip his hand away, but you hold on tighter, rubbing your thumb over his knuckles. 

Jaemin looks quickly between your face and your hand, then up to Jeno’s face. When he finds a lack of jealousy or possessiveness or anger of any sort, Jaemin relaxes. You can see the tension leaving him. 

“You didn’t have to leave,” Jeno says, and he slips over you, briefly straddling you as he crawls over to squeeze himself into the narrow space between you and Jaemin. He grips Jaemin’s leg, shaking it a little. “I’m sorry if we made you uncomfortable by making you watch.”

Jaemin looks quickly away from Jeno’s face to yours and then back again. “You didn’t make me watch. I could’ve left at any point.”

“But you stayed.” Jeno’s hand flexes on Jaemin’s leg. 

You draw Jaemin’s hand back to your lips, giving him another soft kiss against the back of his hand. “We liked it,” you reassure him. “Having you watch us.”

Jaemin snorts. “I’m not surprised. The pair of you are kinda exhibitionists, aren’t you? Finally getting a somewhat captive audience, I’m sure it really got your rocks off. Especially with Jeno’s possessiveness thing.”

Jeno scoffs. “I’m not possessive.”

“No?” Jaemin smiles, challenging. “So you wouldn’t mind if I just...?”

The moment that Jaemin lifts a hand to cup your face, when he leans up over you and begins to lower his face towards yours, your heart races in anticipation. You part your lips around a gasp, your eyelashes fluttering as you fight the warring urges to keep your eyes open to see Jaemin like this and also to close your eyes and drown when he kisses you.

But he doesn’t kiss you. 

Your eyes flutter shut, and you feel his breath on your lips. You feel his fingertips against your cheek. You can feel the buzzing anticipation of his proximity, the energy of want emanating from both of you. But Jaemin doesn’t do it.

And when you open your eyes again as he pulls back, you see that Jeno hasn’t stopped him. Jeno is still kneeling where he’d been when Jaemin had first moved. He’s watching, amused and slightly aroused, but there’s no haze of jealousy in his eyes, no tension in his jaw or his fists. 

“What, you’re just gonna tease her like that?” He laughs as Jaemin slides away from you, completely removing himself from the bed. “You can’t just leave her unkissed.” 

Jaemin looks on as Jeno swoops in to finish the job, giving you an obnoxiously over-the-top morning kiss.

You push Jeno away when it gets to be too much, and then he teasingly rises up on his knees again, twisting on the spot to reach for Jaemin, as if he’s going to kiss him. 

You see the moment that Jaemin’s eyes go wide, when he parts his lips and his tongue darts out to wet them. But Jeno laughs and pulls back before he even gets close to Jaemin.

A phone chimes from the bedside table, and Jaemin quickly checks it, swearing under his breath as he sees the time. “We need to get going if we’re going to catch the ferry.”

So reluctantly you climb from the bed. The three of you move around each other in the bathroom, bumping elbows and shoulders while you brush your teeth, Jeno uses the toilet for his morning piss without a care that both you and Jaemin are standing at the sink. You all get dressed, make sure you’ve got everything packed, and you leave that hotel room and the events that happened inside it behind you.

During the long ride on the ferry, things are normal, much like they’d been on the ride to Jeju. The guys goof around. Jaemin’s taking a few pictures and videos. He keeps catching your eye. 

The weather clears after you leave the island, the sun peeking through the clouds slowly until the clouds vanish entirely, leaving the open sea and bright sunlight dancing off the waves. Jeno and Jaemin briefly leave you alone as they both walk off to check out the view from the other side of the ferry, and you lean against the railing on your side of the ferry, feeling the sun and the wind on your face. 

The dress your wearing flutters around your knees, your hair blows back from your face, and you close your eyes to soak in the feeling. Memories of last night play across the backs of your eyelids. Jeno lips at your ear, Jaemin’s eyes on you. You think of Jaemin’s hand in yours when he’d come to bed, waking this morning and sharing that quiet moment with him before Jeno woke, the look in his eyes that reassured you that everything was going to be okay, that nothing was ruined.

With your eyes closed and the wind somewhat loud in your ears, you don’t hear the approach. One moment you’re alone in the sunlight, and the next moment, there are a pair of arms around your waist, a pair of lips against your cheek, and Jeno’s voice laughing out a “boo!”

His body presses up against yours, his lips trailing down from your cheek to your neck to end at your shoulder. 

“What are you thinking about?” Jeno asks. “You looked happy.”

“Honestly?” You ask, tilting your head against his.

“Mhmm,” Jeno hums, his teeth skimming your bare shoulder. 

You glance around, noticing that most of the other passengers are sitting down. There’s no one around the two of you right now. Jaemin’s not even anywhere to be seen.

“Where’s Jaemin? Did you push him overboard, overcome with jealousy at last from last night?” You tease.

Jeno laughs. “So that’s what you’re thinking about? Last night?”

You nod. “It was good, but I want more, like we said last night. I liked it, and I liked this morning. Were you going to kiss him or was that just a tease?”

Again, he kisses your shoulder. “We can do more, sweetheart.”

He’s not really answering your questions. “So, did you push Jaemin overboard? Where is he?”

Jeno just laughs (which is mildly concerning), but a few minutes later Jaemin walks back into sight, perfectly fine and dry, so he definitely wasn’t tipped overboard. He comes to stand with you and Jeno, leaning his elbows on the rail and turning to look at you still wrapped in Jeno’s arms.

You look right back at him, admiring the way the sunlight shines off the water, reflecting on Jaemin’s cheeks, illuminating his eyes. He looks so handsome, glazed in summer sunlight.

When you reach out, cupping Jaemin’s cheek gently, he smiles at you. And when Jeno’s arms loosen around you, allowing you the freedom to lean closer to Jaemin, his eyes go briefly wide before his lids sink as he focuses on your lips. 

In the back of your mind you wonder if anyone is looking.

But the majority of your mind is buzzing as your hand on Jaemin’s cheek guides his mouth to yours in a first kiss.

He doesn’t hesitate to kiss you. Not even a little. 

Jaemin kisses you like it’s something normal, like Jeno’s hands aren’t still resting on your hips as you kiss Jaemin. 

When Jaemin pulls back, you watch him blink slowly, his gaze sinking down to your lips again like he just might have to kiss you again to remind himself how good it feels. His lips pull into a wide smile, and he turns his head away, hiding the look of happiness from you and Jeno.

The second half of the ferry ride puts the three of you together sitting down, shoulder to shoulder as you look out at the sea. Jeno’s holding your hand on one side, and Jaemin sits on your other side with his leg pressed all alongside yours, and his pinky finger brushes against your pinky finger on your thigh, occasionally overlapping pinkies, but he doesn’t hold your hand. He doesn’t try to kiss you again, just spends most of the time suppressing smiles, giving you and Jeno curious looks.

It’s once you’ve departed the ferry, at last back to the mainland on solid ground that things change slightly. While you’re waiting in the train station for your train to arrive to take the three of you back to Seoul, Jeno disappears to the bathroom.

“Just so you know,” you say as you lean against Jaemin’s side, wrapping your arms around one of his, “Last night was about more than just us wanting an audience. It’s you, Jaemin. We like you. We want you. In case my kiss earlier didn’t, like, make that clear enough.”

He glances sideways at you. “Jeno too?”

You nod, sliding your hand down his arm until your fingers lace with his. “Yes, Jeno too.”

Jeno doesn’t even give the way you’re tangled around Jaemin’s arm a second glance when he returns, and it’s only then in that moment that you realize just how normalized he’s made this. You remember all the times you’ve held Jaemin’s hand, that you’ve cuddled with Jaemin, that you’ve done everything but have an actual romantic or sexual relationship with him. And Jeno has never cared. 

When the three of you board the train, you find a section of seats away from the more heavily occupied section of the train. Unfortunately, there are only two seats to a row, but there are two rows facing each other, so Jaemin just takes the seat in front of yours.

In your car, there’s only a few other people. A family of four sits at the front of the car. An older gentleman is sitting several rows back. A young woman, likely a student, is sitting in the back corner of the car with headphones on and her face buried in her phone.

No one is paying anyone else any attention at all, and you fully expect it to remain that way for the entirety of the two hour train ride.

Jaemin settles into his seat across from you, looking comfortable, like maybe he just might take a nap. But then the train starts moving, and not too long later, so does Jeno.

At first it seems like nothing. He just lays a hand on your thigh. But soon his hand is moving, fingertips against bare skin as the hem of your dress rides a little higher. His fingernails skim your skin, prickling heat that spreads to your core. You shift in your seat, lifting your gaze to Jaemin, and you find that he’s already looking.

When Jeno’s hand actually dips under the edge of your dress, you make a soft sound, your heart pounding in your chest as you reach to stop him. 

You’re in public. Totally in public where anyone on this train could look over and see what’s happening. Sure, the car isn’t crowded, but you know people might pass through here. 

Jeno grabs your wrists, and he safely pins them against your belly. 

“Quiet, jagi, be a good girl. Show Jaemin how good you listen.” He pecks your cheek, and keeping one hand on your wrists, Jeno drops the other back to the bottom of your dress. 

This dress makes it too easy for him to make you feel exposed. It’s similar to a wrap skirt style, so there’s a slit that Jeno slips his fingers under, flicking them to get the split to widen. He lightly brushes one side of the skirt off one of your legs, then uses his fingers to flick the other side off the other, his fingertips press against your knees, causing you to spread your legs a little wider for Jaemin to see.

Jeno looks around quickly, checking to make sure that no one is looking, that no one is coming, and then he starts really touching.

He runs his fingers up and down your thighs, coming so close to where you want and need him, but never doing more than just barely coming in contact with the elastic edges of your panties. 

Across from you, Jaemin doesn’t look quite so sleepy anymore. He’s intrigued, aroused. 

Jeno strokes and massages your thighs, a total tease right then, as you feel like your body is on fire. Heat simmers just beneath your skin. You let out a soft whimper that feels loud in the near silence of the train car.

“Shh, sweetheart,” Jeno reminds you. He taps a finger beneath your chin, and you turn your face toward him, letting him tilt your mouth up to his with his single finger. 

Even while Jeno kisses you, he doesn’t stop touching you. Hands on your legs, brushing briefly over the center of your panties. Your body jolts with sensitivity and need, another little moan spilling into the kiss.

“If you’re not quiet, I’m going to have to send you over to sit with Jaemin. I’m sure he’s got a way to keep you quiet.” Jeno murmurs, and then he’s pinching your jaw, turning your head to look over at Jaemin.

He’s got a hand in his lap doing a poor job of covering the obvious bulge in the front of his pants. 

“So be good, sweetheart.” Jeno kisses your ear, hooks his hand around your leg, tugging the one nearest him over his knee. “If you’re good, well, I see a reward in store for you when we get home.”

You sigh pleasantly as Jeno starts feeling up your legs again, baring you even more as he hitches your leg higher over his. You look across at Jaemin, as his eyes follow the movement of Jeno’s hands on your thighs, as he notes every rise and fall of your chest, and you notice too the way that he’s gently squeezing his dick.

All you want is for Jeno to actually touch you, to press the pads of his fingers over your panties, or even better to actually just dip them inside your panties, soak his fingers to the knuckles with your wetness. But he doesn’t do that. Instead he looks over at Jaemin and begins to hold a conversation with him.

They talk about everything. Nothing. Anything but you. Jaemin can hardly take his eyes off of you though, but occasionally you do notice the way that his gaze lingers on Jeno’s hand, trailing up his arm, detouring to look at Jeno’s lap for a moment before returning to his veiny arm and hand.

Finally, when you’re almost hiccuping to draw breath from the need burning you up from the inside out, Jeno pulls his hand away. Your knees almost snap back together, you turn your face against his shoulder and whine. 

By this point, Jaemin is obviously touching himself over his pants, grinding the heel of his palm against the bulge.

“Jeno, Jeno, please,” you moan quietly, just loud enough for Jaemin to be able to hear too. “I wanna cum. Please, just give me your fingers.”

He looks and sounds far too amused when he holds his hand out to you. “What are you going to do with them?”

“Jen.” Jaemin’s voice is deep, hard with just a hint of a soft plea mixed in there. “Just do it. Please.”

You think it’s that please that finally breaks Jeno’s resolve as his hand slides up your thigh, finally stroking his fingers along your core over your panties. Your hands fly to his arm, clutching tightly with a soft gasp as he swirls his middle finger slowly over your clit. 

Once again, your legs spread wide, the skirt of your dress draped over the sides and bunched at your waist. 

You watch Jaemin while he watches you and Jeno. It’s sweet enough to feel the buzz of static pleasure under your skin when Jeno’s touch pushes aside your panties, exposing your pussy to himself and Jaemin as he buries his fingers inside you. But what’s sweeter still is to watch Jaemin’s lips part on a deep inhale, his hand gripping around his erection in his pants, his eyes dark and watchful.

Jeno’s lips are against your ear, kissing, nipping, whispering to you. His other hand that’s not fingering you is draped over your opposite shoulder, positioned just so to be able to tease you nipple, to have you arching into his touch until he moves his fingers to be able to palm at your tit.

You’re trying so hard to keep quiet. You know that you could happily and easily be moaning for Jeno, but there are the other passengers to be considered and you really don’t want to be kicked off the train before Seoul and charged with public indecency.

Looking at Jaemin as Jeno plunges his fingers inside you again and again, as you can feel your wetness soaking your inner thighs and likely creating quite an indecent spot on the back of your dress, you swear it looks like Jaemin’s about to drop off the edge of his seat, cross the couple feel of space between you and settle between your legs on his knees to get a taste.

Your nails dig into Jeno’s arm at the mental image of Jaemin eating you out right now. 

“Jaemin,” you moan softly, bucking your hips.

“Oh, is that how you’re going to play this?” Jeno asks. “You really want Jaemin?”

He pulls his hand away from you, and both you and Jaemin snap your attention to Jeno. 

“I’m touching you and you’re moaning his name, sweetheart?” Jeno’s hand slaps down against your pussy. “Go on, then. Go have him touch you.”

Jeno withdraws from you completely, appraising you and Jaemin both with a smirk on his face. You try to pull his hand back between your legs for him to finish what he started, but Jeno just shakes his head and looks pointedly at Jaemin. 

“I mean it. Go to him.”

Before you can move to obey, you hear the sharp sound of the door at the front of the car sliding open. Your legs snap back together, and you pull your dress into place. 

“Jeno?” You ask quietly. “Really?”

He presses a kiss to the side of your head. “You clearly want to get fucked, sweetheart. And he clearly wants you too, look at how hard Jaeminnie is just from watching.”

A staff member is passing down the aisle towards your row, and you feel flushed, at the thought of how she could have almost caught you. And you feel even warmer, like you must be obviously sweaty and flushed, when Jeno lifts a hand and waves at the woman.

“Excuse me, where the restroom? Our friend isn’t feeling too well?” He gestures at you, and a fresh wave of embarrassed heat washes over you. You drop your head back against the seat.

“Oh, of course. There’s a lavatory in the back of the car.” She smiles, glances over you, and then she hurries along her way out the door at the back of the car and onto the next.

Jeno kisses the side of your head again. “Alright, there you go. Lavatory is at the back of the car. Go have fun. Jaemin, now’s your chance to practice some more acting. Our girlfriend’s sick, so take her back there and make sure she’s okay.”

Jaemin smirks at the acting challenge. “Yeah?”

And then just like that his expression clears and shifts into one of concern as he stands and reaches for you. You press a quick kiss to Jeno’s lips, whispering a thank you, before you let Jaemin take your hand and pull you to your feet. He wraps and arm around you, cooing and speaking in a worried voice to you as he guides you along the aisle toward the back of the car. Not that anyone is looking, but if they were then you feel that Jaemin’s acting would fool them into believing that he’s taking his girlfriend that feels unwell to the restroom.

The moment that the door of the restroom opens, you grab the front of Jaemin’s shirt, and you drag him inside the tiny compartment with you.

The door snaps shut, he fumbles with the lock. You reel him in closer as you press up on your toes and drag him again into a kiss. 

This kiss is different than the one earlier on the ferry. That one had been mild and sweet. A first kiss. This one is pure lust, a hungry moan breaks from you. Jaemin’s hands push at your skirt, splitting it much like Jeno had, and he grabs your thighs, dragging one up to hook around his hip. 

In this tiny restroom, there’s a toilet, a small sink with a little bit of a ledge around it, a mirror bolted to the wall. There’s a window looking out on the countryside that blurs by outside. 

Jaemin backs you up to the sink, lifting you to sit on the ledge. His fingers dig into your thighs, he grinds forward between your legs, and you feel Jaemin’s erection against your soaked core through your panties.

“In me. Jaemin, please. I need your cock,” you beg, trailing your fingers up and down his chest. “Please let me cum.”

Jaemin groans. “It’s so hot when you beg.” He kisses down your throat, and when he reaches the base, he just buries his face into the crook between your shoulder and your neck, breathing in deeply as his fingers draw up your thighs, reaching your panties. “Beg me again, baby?”

“Jaemin,” you moan breathlessly, “Please, I need to cum on your cock.”

He makes a satisfied sound, and then he’s pulling your panties aside like Jeno had. Jaemin slides his fingers inside you, two at first, and then three a moment later when he finds that you’re more than ready for him. You start up a quiet chant of his name, pouring from your lips softly and growing slowly louder as he works you toward orgasm on his fingers with his breath and lips and teeth at your collarbone.

You grip at Jaemin’s shoulders, your hips rocking on the edge of the bathroom sink when his fingers curl inside you, pressing up against your G-spot. “Jaemin!” You gasp, fingers digging into his shoulders as your orgasm hits. Your leg squeezes around his hips, your pussy around his fingers, and Jaemin just sucks a small mark against your collarbone, fingering you through your orgasm, feeling your wetness gushing between his fingers.

“Jaem. Jaem, c’mere,” you murmur after a few moments, moving your hands from his shoulders to his hair, bringing his mouth up from your shoulder so you can look him in the eye. 

“Good?” He asks, a confident, pleased smile on his lips.

“Shut up and fuck me. God, please, please, Jaemin.” 

He crushes his mouth against yours, the kiss heavy and hungry again as he withdraws his hands from you, but you can feel him fumbling with the front of his pants, and a moment later, Jaemin’s pressing closer to you. His knuckles brush your inner thigh as he strokes his cock.

You spread your legs a little further, lean back a little so your shoulders hit the mirror over the sink, and you pull Jaemin over you.

He sinks inside you, the slight pressure of his cock against your entrance giving way easily as he fits so good inside you. Your moans escape the kiss, and Jaemin even makes a deep sound of pleasure feeling your pussy at last around him.

Not to compare him and Jeno (but you can’t really help it), but he fits inside you nearly the same. He’s a little smaller, but damn you don’t think it matters. 

You feel dizzy with the pleasure as Jaemin starts fucking you on the sink, as he kisses you breathless, as he dedicates one hand to stimulating your clit. You feel like the world has been knocked sideways, or maybe your shoulders are actually just sliding down the mirror, your hips sliding off the edge of the sink. You’re too lost in finally getting Jaemin inside you that you lose your orientation of the world.

You think maybe he loses it a little bit too as he stumbles back, as he falls down onto the train’s toilet, dropping you down onto his cock. You move automatically, clutching his shoulders, rolling your hips and lifting yourself up only to drop back down again, riding Jaemin with everything you’ve got, desperate to cum again. 

He looks up at you, his eyes blazing, his lips swollen from the kiss. His hands rest on your hips for a moment, helping you a little in getting into the rhythm, and then his hands drift higher, touching your tits for a moment before he instead buries his fingers in your hair and draws your mouth back against his.

You think maybe you love kissing Jaemin. Not that you don’t love kissing Jeno, because you absolutely do, but kissing Jaemin is just different and so good. It makes all of this hotter and more intense and passionate and more than just a quick fuck in the restroom of a moving train.

“Fuck,” Jaemin groans against your lips. “Fuck, baby, ‘m gonna cum.”

“Okay.” You clench around him, pressing down until he’s deep inside you. “Cum for me, Jaemin. You can cum inside me.”

And he does barely a minute later. His hands tighten in your hair as he cums, twisting the hair almost painfully around his fingers as he presses your mouth against his. You moan opening your mouth for him, dipping your tongue into his mouth, and Jaemin tangles with you.

You keep riding him even after he cums, rolling down onto his cock, rocking in his lap. Jaemin drops one hand from your hair to your clit, and it’s only moments later that your second orgasm of this train ride arrives. 

You push his hand away from between your legs, and Jaemin just brings it back to your hair. You’re happy to stay like this, sitting on his cock, kissing him as the train rumbles beneath you, as the world passes by outside. You know you should stop, should go back out there to Jeno. But moving off Jaemin’s cock sounds like too much right now.

Until your lust-riddled brain finally registers one of the last things Jeno had said. 

Our girlfriend, he’d said. He’d told Jaemin to make it look like our girlfriend was sick. 

Months and months of this thing with Jeno, this unlabeled relationship, and finally he’d put one on it but only in relation with Jaemin. And you were so good with that. He’d called you not only his girlfriend, but Jaemin’s too, and once again you feel that pure sense of rightness at it all.

“We should go back out there,” you reluctantly tell Jaemin a moment later.

“You go first,” Jaemin tells you, but neither one of you make a move to leave. His fingers are still tangled through your hair, and both of you are still pressing lazy kisses to the other’s lips. You stay like that for a few more moments until Jaemin’s mouth moves away from yours, leaving light kisses along the arch of your throat.

Pulling apart from him is not a great time. It’s been a while since you rode Jeno, so as you stand your thighs ache dully. You wipe yourself up with a wad of toilet paper and Jaemin’s amused gaze on you the whole time. He watches as you check yourself out in the mirror, straightening your dress, sighing at the state of your hair before finally just pulling it up in a messy ponytail, and you look back over at him.

“I’ll be back out there in a minute.” 

Your legs feel a little wobbly as you make your way back along the aisle, but you hope that you’re successfully passing it off as just being the movement of the train.

When you reach your row at last, Jeno’s playing games on his phone, and he only looks up when you brush your fingertips along his cheek as you move around him to sink down into your seat.

Jeno chuckles, picking up your hand and pressing his lips to the back of it. “Good?”

You sigh. “Fuck, yes. I think I need a nap.” You close your eyes and drop your head to his shoulder. “I can’t wait til we get him in an actual bed.”

Jeno kisses the top of your head. “Me too. I’ve got some ideas.”

“Yeah?” You turn your head on his shoulder to bury your face against his shirt. “Some ideas of what you and Jaemin are going to do to your girlfriend?”

Jeno groans quietly. “I was almost hoping you didn’t catch that.”

“Almost?”

He laces his fingers perfectly through yours, twitching slightly when Jaemin walks back to his seat right across from you. “Only almost,” Jeno admits, “because I love you, jagi, and even though we never use that label of girlfriend or boyfriend, I want you to know that you are special to me. I want Jaeminnie to know that he’s special to us like that too.”

Jaemin smiles in his seat, turning his head to look out the window as if that’s going to keep either of you from noticing how happy he looks at being officially welcomed into this relationship.

Jaemin fits into the relationship easily. Really, when you think about it, he’s been almost as much a part of this relationship since the beginning as either you or Jeno. It’s just that now he’s fully in it, romantically, sexually, everything.

Now when you come over to the apartment after a long day, you might tumble into Jaemin’s arms on the sofa, bury your face against his shoulder while he hugs you tightly and tucks his face into your hair. Now, he might join you and Jeno in the mornings for a quick shower together, cupping your face in his hands as he leans in to kiss you while Jeno’s hands slip over your soapy body.

And it’s not just the way that Jaemin is with you. He and Jeno, who have always been attached at the hip have a new closeness too. When the three of you sleep in the same bed, Jeno and Jaemin tangle themselves together. When Jeno wakes you with a sleepy kiss, he shares one with Jaemin too. While you share small acts of intimacy with Jaemin, you start to notice Jeno sharing those with him too. Little taps against Jaemin’s arm when he wants to hold his hand. The way that he seems to always need to be in contact with Jaemin when they’re standing beside each other (to be fair, he does that with you too). 

But despite his perfect fit into the relationship, you haven’t had sex all three of you together really. 

You’ve had sex with them individually. You’ve done it again where one of them watches the other with you. But you haven’t had both of them together with you, both of them touching you and kissing you at the same time.

“I want it,” you whine to Jaemin as you sit in his lap in his bed. “Both of you.”

Jeno’s gone for the day, busy with a schedule, so you’d taken the opportunity to go out with Jaemin. But that had meant coming here first to meet him, and you had yet to make it out of his bedroom. 

“Do you think you can handle us both, baby?” Jaemin looks at you coolly, not letting his face show if he’s affected at all by what you’re asking for, the way that you’re sitting in his lap in a scanty little outfit while you feel up his chest and roll your hips against his thigh.

“I know I can.” You’ve been thinking about it more and more, your mind creating elaborate fantasies of having hours and hours of fun with both of your boyfriends. Them taking turns and taking you together, taking a break from making you feel good to just have fun with each other before coming back to you. “I’ve talked to Jeno about it already. He’s been thinking about it too.”

Jaemin’s eyebrows twitch, his hands squeezing your hips slightly as you roll yourself down for some contact against his thigh. 

“He told me all about what he wants the two of you to do to me,” you lower your voice, leaning in with your arms around Jaemin’s neck. “How he wants to see you both ruin me until I’m begging and crying, overstimulated from both of you making me cum. He told me that you might like it if I call you daddy.”

Jaemin scoffs, and the next thing you know, you’re on your back with him hovering above you, his hands twisted in the sheets on either side of your head. “Just so you know, baby, it’s Jeno with a daddy kink. Not me.” Jaemin lowers his body down against yours, and you can feel he’s half-hard against your thigh. “Maybe I should tie you up and leave you as a pretty present on Daddy’s bed, huh?”

A rush of arousal soaks your panties. His name is just a gasp off your lips, melting into a moan.

“Should we surprise him later?” Jaemin asks. “When he gets home from his schedule? Give him you all tied up like a pretty gift, ready to be shared between him and I?”

At that moment you want nothing more than for Jaemin to tear your clothes off, for him to get you ready for him and Jeno, for him to tie you up and make you beg for more. But you’re not alone in the apartment right now. Someone else is home because you’d heard him walking around after you came inside Jaemin’s room.

“Don’t tease me with what I can’t have right now.” You close your eyes, try to think of something that will calm the racing of your heart, but that’s hard to do when Jaemin is pressed up against you, when he’s slowly grinding down against your leg. 

“You’re right,” Jaemin says. “We have plans today that don’t involve staying in bed.”

And just like that, he’s gone. Standing off the bed and moving around the room while you lie there motionless with your heart and mind racing. 

Eventually you get up. Eventually, the two of you leave the apartment. You message Jeno to let him know that Jaemin’s a menace, and you only get an amused reply from him. 

It’s hard to focus on your day with Jaemin when every moment of it, all you’re thinking of is still being in his bed, or maybe being in a big bubbly bathtub of a fancy hotel with him and Jeno. You think of kneeling on the dirty floor of a public restroom with both of your boyfriends standing in front of you and gagging you on their cocks. 

Your mind is filled with filth all day, so by the time that you and Jaemin are heading home for the day, you’re clinging to his hand and wishing that his fingers were inside you. 

“Maybe we should go to my place,” you suggest, “We can tell Jeno to meet us there.” 

Jaemin once again gives you one of his cool, unreadable looks. 

“Please,” you whine, stepping closer to him, tucking yourself right up against his side as you pull his hand to the front of your shorts. You don’t care that you’re in public, that there are still people around. None of them are looking probably, and even if they are, you doubt that they can actually see the way that you’re cupping his hand right against your pussy. “Jaemin, please.”

His throat bobs, and that’s the only sign he makes that you’re affecting him. “I’ll let Jeno know.” He steps away from you, and he holds tighter to your hand as you pass down the street, aiming for your place.

You’re not privy to the conversation that he and Jeno have. He messages Jeno with one hand while you walk, and any time that you try to sneak a peek, he tilts his phone away, and when you finally make a desperate noise and reach for his phone, Jaemin just slips it in his pocket.

“Relax, baby. He’ll come over as soon as his schedule ends.” Jaemin presses a kiss to the top of your head. 

You’re glad that you’ve got an apartment all to yourself. The moment you’re inside, Jaemin presses you up against the door, his hands in your hair and on your face, he kisses you and you twist your hands in his shirt. 

You want to get straight to it, to have Jaemin fuck you right here against your apartment’s door or maybe to stumble over to the sofa and have him fuck you there. But he pulls away before you can even attempt to drag his hands inside your clothes.

When you whine, Jaemin just coos at you, petting your hair, “Needy, baby girl. That hungry for Daddy’s cock?”

“Thought you didn’t have a Daddy kink?” You push at his shoulders. 

Jaemin just grins and shrugs. “I might like it a bit. But more in the way of liking to see you being a sweet submissive baby for Jeno and I. You can call me Daddy if you want, my pretty baby.” He pets your hair again, and he starts to lean in to kiss you again, but you lay your hand on his chest.

“I have an idea. A surprise for you and Jeno. Do you want it?” You drum your fingers on Jaemin’s chest, and he smiles brighter before nodding eagerly. You push him away gently towards your sofa. “Okay, go sit.”

Jaemin watches you disappear towards your bedroom, and you hear him groan in disappointment when you close the door behind you so he can’t see. Jaemin doesn’t get to see as you strip naked, as you dig around to find the cute lingerie you’d recently purchased specifically for the intent of having your boyfriends seeing you in it.

A sexy black bra, matching crotchless panties, and a set of black fishnet thigh highs that have little bows at the top and a garter belt to match. You check yourself over in a mirror in your bedroom to make sure it looks as good as you feel (it does), and then you grab out a few more things, sitting them on your bedside table before you call for Jaemin.

Then you take a seat on your bed, arranging yourself into a pose that you hope looks sexy. 

When Jaemin opens your door and peeks inside, his eyes go wide momentarily. “What is this?” He smiles around the words, pushing the door fully open and stepping inside. 

“I know Jeno likes to see me like this, so I thought maybe dress up pretty and we play in front of a camera for Jeno? Send it to him so he can see what he’s missing out on until he can come join?” You feel an odd sense of nerves as Jaemin approaches the bed. “And besides,” you explain, “I have a feeling that I’ll require a bit of prep before whatever is going to commence later.”

At that, Jaemin’s gaze wanders over to the table beside your bed, the assortment of toys and lube and a few other things that you��ve got sitting there.

“Fuck, baby,” Jaemin moans, cupping your face again in his hands. “We’re gonna have so much fun.”

And you absolutely do. It’s not long before Jaemin’s reaching for one of the toys, a small vibrator that’s mostly just for use against your clit. He spreads your legs and holds the vibrator against your while you moan and squeal into his kiss. And when you’re close, he pulls away, sitting the vibrator back among your collection, reaching for something new.

Jaemin has an intense curiosity about your toys, edging you and testing each of them out--a basic dildo, a vibrator that sits deep inside you and stimulates your clit externally, a really thick dildo that you bought just out of curiosity but have only really used a couple times when you really were desperate to be filled. But it’s when Jaemin picks up a shiny jewel-ended plug that his eyes really light up.

He looks between it and you, swallowing down his words as he keeps glancing at your ass, as if he’s imagining the sight of the jeweled end of the plug nestled between your cheeks.

You flip over onto your belly with a whine, baring your ass to him.

“Baby?” Jaemin says the word like it’s a question, his hand coming down onto your ass gently. “You want me to open up your ass? Get you nice and stretched so you can take Jeno and I at the same time, feel us deep inside you. Bet you’ll look so pretty between us.”

You’d never really done anal with Jeno before. You had with a guy or two in your past, but Jeno had never expressed that particular interest, so you didn’t want to push. But judging by the look on Jaemin’s face right then, you think you’ve certainly found someone who will adore fucking your ass, opening you up on his fingers nice and slow.

“Yeah, Jaemin, please.”

His fingers slide between your cheeks, spreading them so he can get a look at your asshole. He just brushes a dry fingertip over it, which even that has you making an uncontrollable sound of need. 

And then Jaemin spits. His warm, wet saliva drips down over your asshole, down to your pussy. You bury your face in your arms, muffling a “please” that you can’t hold in.

“I’ve got you, baby,” Jaemin pats your ass cheek. “Gonna use lots of lube, open you up until you could even take that big toy that stretches your pussy so wide.”

Yeah, you’ve never taken that one up your ass before, and just the idea of it makes your stomach do flips. You’re sure you’d actually be able to feel it in your belly, rearranging your guts if you let him fuck you with it. 

“Just relax.” Jaemin soothingly rubs your ass and your thighs as he leans over you, reaching again for the bedside table, grabbing a bottle of lube, and sinking back down into his spot. “Daddy’s gonna make you feel good.”

You turn your head to the side, looking at him and catching his eye, his quick smile. “Daddy,” you repeat teasingly. “I could probably take it easier if you let me cum.”

Jaemin makes an expression like he’s not quite sure he believes you about that. “We’ll see, but you were pretty bad while we were out today, honey. I’m not so sure you deserve the reward of getting to cum. You were so handsy, and we were in public; I think maybe you need a little punishment.”

Jaemin starts out slowly, generous with the lube, stroking his clean hand over your thighs and your back as he circles his finger there against your entrance. He murmurs in your ear soothingly when he finally presses a fingertip past the tight ring of muscle. He takes it slow, checking with you that you’re good as he starts working that finger in and out of you.

He’s good at this, and you wonder where he got the experience with anal, if he’s hooked up with many other girls who also liked anal. Guys?

Before you can find the breath to ask him, Jaemin pulls his hand away from you. “Lift up on your knees, baby,” he tells you, tapping on your thigh. “I’m gonna be a little bit nice and give your pussy some attention too.”

You lift your ass and spread your knees a little as Jaemin positions himself behind you, one dry hand and one sticky caress your ass. The hand sticky with lube returns to getting two fingers inside your ass, the other hand just tucks into the band of your thigh high or plucks at the suspenders connecting the garter to the belt around your waist. And then you feel his warm tongue on your clit.

Any thought of questioning him about his experience with anal flies out of your mind as he starts fingering your ass and sucking and licking at your clit. 

You do relax, finding it easier and easier to take his fingers the closer you draw to an orgasm, your moans and cries of his name picking up in frequency until you bite down on your arm to keep quiet.

Jaemin’s got several fingers inside you, smoothly gliding with the liberal amount of lube he’d used, and you think you could probably definitely cum from this, probably any moment now.

And then he pulls away.

“I hate you!” You cry when Jaemin withdraws all contact with your body. 

“Shh,” he shushes you, chuckling a little as he brings his fingers back up to plunge into you a few more times. And then you feel the dull press of the plug instead, the way that it stretches your rim before fitting snuggly into place, leaving you feeling perfectly filled.

You sink back down to lie on your belly, feeling the plug shifting slightly inside you. You hum pleasantly, but still want to cry out, want to grind your clit against the comforter bunching up beneath your body. 

“Perfect, baby,” Jaemin tells you, and he moves up off the bed. “This is exactly what we should send to Jeno to show him why he needs to hurry over. I’m going to take a video of you, okay?”

“Okay,” you agree, and you lift yourself up a little, posing for the video so Jeno will be able to see the highlights of your ass and the pretty plug and your thigh highs, and you very wet pussy.

Jaemin tosses his phone to the side after he sends the video, and then he’s rolling you over onto your back beneath him, and you drag his mouth into a kiss. You attempt to roll your hips against his thigh as it slips between both of yours, but Jaemin doesn’t allow it. His hands press against your hips, pinning them down against the bed.

“What did I tell you? Punishment, honey. No cumming yet.”

It’s cruel, and you tell him that, but that only amuses Jaemin, so he keeps doing it. Keeps kissing you, letting you get a few grinds in against his thigh before he pins your hips down against the bed, lets you cool off for a few minutes while he starts touching himself. 

And watching Jaemin jerk himself off does nothing to help your perpetual state of arousal and the craving to achieve your orgasm. 

So you resort to begging, constantly pleading with him to let you cum, that it’ll be so much better later with both of them if you’ve already cum once or twice. But the constant stream of begging is enough for Jaemin to get fed up, and you’re more than happy to shut up when he at last straddles your chest and tells you that he wants you to suck him off.

It works for a bit, sucking your boyfriend’s cock is a good distraction for the constant reminder of your own horniness, but after a handful of minutes, you remember the hot throbbing need between your thighs, the full feeling in your ass contrasting the emptiness in your pussy. And Jaemin’s obviously preoccupied by your mouth around his cock, so he doesn’t notice when you slide a hand down between your legs, stroking your fingers first over your clit and soon plunging them inside your hungry pussy.

You’re not sure what alerts him to the way that you’re pleasuring yourself, but he does notice.

“Alright, now I really have to give you a punishment. Blatantly disregarding my instruction that you’re not to cum?” Jaemin grabs your hand and lifts it up above your head, then he grabs your other hand. “I was joking earlier about tying you up, but I guess now I just might have to.”

You do have a few ropes within your collection, and Jaemin reaches for them now. 

Now these you have used with Jeno before. He was interested in shibari, tying you up in tight positions in a pretty way, and he was good at it. But you hadn’t used your ropes like this before.

Jaemin ties one wrist to the other tight enough that you can’t slip out of them, but not so tight that they’d be totally uncomfortable. He checks with you before he drags the other end of the tope through a space in the headboard of your bed, drawing the rope taut so your hands are bound above your head. 

“Good?” He asks as he returns to a spot between your legs. His hands skim back and forth over the fishnets. “Not too tight?”

“No.” You shake your head. “I’m sorry. Can you go back to fucking my mouth?”

Now Jaemin shakes his head no, denying you even this. And then his fingers slide up over the material of the crotchless panties and your belly flips in anticipation of him touching you in the way he’d just punished you for. But instead Jaemin reaches for the panties, unfastening the suspenders from the garters so he can slide the panties down your legs unhindered. 

He lays the panties beside you on the bed, and then his hands are back on your legs, tightening around your ankles as he moves off the bed, and he spreads your legs apart. You immediately understand what he means to do, so you leave your legs spread towards the bottom corners of your bed even when Jaemin moves away, returning to your collection of items to uncover the other bundles of rope you own.

This time Jaemin ties your ankles to the opposite ends of the footboard of your bed, leaving you spread open, pussy exposed, the pretty plug fully visible nestled between your cheeks. 

You watch as he starts stroking his cock again, and you try to shift, to roll your hips in search of friction, but you can’t hardly do that. You whine and drop your head to the bed. You feel Jaemin shift closer, and the next time you look down your body at him, he’s kneeling right between your spread legs, jerking himself off as he looks down at your pussy.

It’s not fair, you think, that he gets to jerk off and cum when he’s been teasing you for so long.

“So you like using me?” You ask. “Just something pretty for you to cum on?” 

Jaemin smirks before he tips his head back to moan. “Baby, if that’s all you were to me, I wouldn’t have followed you and Jeno around like a lovesick puppy for so long. Ah, fuck, I am gonna cum on you though, leave you a pretty painted mess for Jeno to enjoy when he gets here.”

A little moan escapes you. You like the idea of that: being covered in Jaemin’s cum, having Jeno add to the mess. 

But Jaemin doesn’t just only jerk himself off, he starts to tease you again, dipping his hips down so he’s still jerking off but he’s also humping his fist, driving his erection right over your sensitive clit. Before long you’re moaning and whining, begging and crying for him to let you cum.

Your thighs are twitching, eyes tearing up, and your mouth is hanging open with pleas freefalling from your lips. You’ve already seen him shut you up once this afternoon due to you begging, so it shouldn’t really be a surprise when Jaemin grabs your panties, balls them up, and then stuffs them between your lips.

He’s just about to start being a fucking tease again when you hear the sound of his phone buzzing on the other side of the bed. He ignores it, immediately getting back to jerking off, but you twist your head to the side out of curiosity, and you see Jeno’s face on the screen before it goes dark. A few seconds later, the phone starts ringing again, vibrating on the bed. 

Jaemin leans over you to get it, and you watch as he puts it on speaker.

“Yah, what the hell? Without me?” Jeno complains. 

“Yeah, it’s not our fault that you were busy today. We’re having fun. Isn’t that right, baby?” Jaemin asks, and he glides his cock right over your clit, inciting a muffled moan from you. “Well, she can’t really talk right now, but we’re having fun.”

Jeno’s voice is slightly strained when he asks, “What’s happening?”

“You want me to describe it to you?” Jaemin asks. Jeno makes a sound that says that he absolutely wants to hear it all, so Jaemin laughs and says, “Well, She’s all tied up like a pretty present, just waiting for you to come enjoy. She’s so wet, Jeno-ya, and she wouldn’t stop begging for me to fuck her so I had to gag her. I told her that she doesn’t get to cum, that she’s being punished.”

You hear Jeno curse under his breath. “I wanna see.”

“Then hurry up. She’s ready for us to share her, isn’t that right, honey? You want both of us at the same time?” Jaemin asks, putting on a babying tone. You can only moan in response, attempting to rock your hips up to get his cock to give you more of what you crave. “Did you hear her, Jeno?”

“Yeah, I hear. I’ll be there soon. Jagi, this is why I need a key to your place. I swear to God, Na Jaemin, if you leave me waiting outside the door just so you can finish, I’ll--”

You don’t find out what threat Jeno was about to make because Jaemin ends the call right then. 

“If he’s going to be here soon, I should probably hurry then, make you look even prettier for him, right?”

You nod, watching as Jaemin starts just using his hand, fucking into it like he wishes he was inside you. He doesn’t last too much longer, cumming between his fingers. A string of cum stretches over the length of your belly, ending just an inch shy of the bottom of your bra. The rest of it drips across your belly, pooling around your navel.

Jaemin snags the edge of the panties from your mouth, dragging them out so you can properly breathe. “Good?” 

“Yes,” you reply. “You know, Jeno doesn’t usually edge me this long. He’s probably going to let me cum as soon as he gets here.” 

Jaemin smiles, reaching out to brush his fingers along your lips. “Maybe I won’t let him. I’ll tell him my whole secret plan. Maybe I’ll make him watch me fuck you like he did when we were in Jeju. But in the meantime, I wanna hear you beg a little more, baby. Think you can handle it?”

You narrow your eyes at him. Your body is aching with the need to cum already, but you can take a bit more, so you agree.

Jaemin reaches back over for the small vibrator, and that’s what he uses on you, turning it higher and then lower and then higher and pulling it away, doing it over and over again until you’re getting too noisy and he stuffs the panties back in your mouth. 

When you finally hear the distant sound of Jeno knocking on your apartment door, Jaemin drops the vibrator, and you think maybe he actually is going to immediately let Jeno in to never learn what your other boyfriend was going to threaten him with. But Jaemin returns to your collection, and a moment later he’s leaning over you, brandishing a blindfold.

“This’ll be fun, baby, okay?” His voice is reassuring, and you nod because you trust him. You trust both Jeno and Jaemin, you love them both, so even though you’re about to bound up, gagged, and blindfolded with the two of them, you know that it’ll be good and fun. 

You lift your head and let Jaemin cover your eyes with the blindfold, which is basically just a sleep mask that you repurposed one time. After Jaemin’s satisfied, he presses a kiss to your cheek and says, “I’ll be right back with our boyfriend.”

You wish you could see Jeno’s face when Jaemin is the one to open the door of your apartment for him. You wish that you could actually hear their conversation, but your heart is pounding so loudly in your ears that it drowns out any hope of hearing their words. All you hear is the sound of their voices, their footsteps approaching, and finally Jeno’s sharp inhale when he sees you like this.

You whine, making an attempt to buck your hips or squirm, to get him to come closer and touch you the way that you deserve.

“Look at how wet she is,” Jeno’s tone is one of awe. You hear him coming over the bed, feel the shift of weight as he leans on the bed between your spread legs. “How long have you been teasing her, Jaemin?”

“Well, she’s been wet all day, Jeno.” A hand comes down on your thigh, and you moan around the balled up panties. “When she came over earlier before we went out, she started humping me in my bed. Couldn’t keep her hands to herself while we were in public either, she was all but begging for me to fingerfuck her right on the sidewalk in the middle of a crowd of people.” 

Jaemin tuts, and you hear Jeno chuckle.

“And, well, you’ve seen a little bit of what’s been happening. I had to finger her open for us. I wanted to test out her range of toys.” Jaemin’s fingers lightly stroke your thigh as he speaks. “It’s been at least, what, two hours since we started this? She’s desperate to cum, Jeno, I’ve been edging her for most of that.”

At the reminder of how much your body craves climax, you whine again, thighs shaking as you ache to press your legs together, your hips rocking up off the bed.

“But she shouldn’t be allowed to cum, right?” Jaemin asks, and his fingernails scrape along your inner thigh. You feel like you’re on fire. “Not until we’ve both had our fun.”

Jeno snorts. “Looks like you’ve already had yours.” His fingers slide over your belly, touching Jaemin’s drying cum. “Did you fuck her?”

“Jerked off, though she spent the whole time begging for me to fuck her.” Jaemin sounds so proud of himself, and you just know that he’s got a smug look on his face. “Fucked her mouth earlier.”

Fingers brush your pussy, and you whine, hips jerking. Jeno makes a soft, breathy laugh. “How’d you resist her? I’ve been here two minutes and I’m about to give in. You want to cum so badly right now, jagi, don’t you?” 

You moan and nod, your body arching with pleasure when a pair of fingers sink into your pussy. Jeno’s touch is so familiar, you have no issue with recognizing his fingers inside you. 

“Jaeminnie says that he’s got a plan, though,” Jeno explains, dragging his fingers back out of you, spreading your wetness around before trailing his fingers lower to trace around the plug. “Why didn’t you ever tell me you wanted to try anal, sweetheart? I bet you look so pretty getting your ass pounded.”

“I know she is. Even just fucking her with my fingers, she looked so beautiful, Jeno. Imagine how she’ll look between us, stuffed with both of us.” Jaemin’s hand slides down the length of your body, and you feel him reaching your belly, and then his hand lifts, and a second later it comes down on your clit. “Gonna be a good girl for your Daddies?”

You moan through the panty gag, nodding your head excitedly. You want to be good for them. You want them to give you everything, to finally let you cum, to fill you up with their cocks until you feel like you’ll burst. 

“Okay, baby, here. Take this.” Jaemin presses something into your bound hands, and you can’t tell what it is until he says, “It’s a vibrator. If what we’re doing gets to be too much and you want us to stop, you can press the button here,” he guides your thumb to the little switch, “and it’s that one you’ve got that moves a lot, so we’ll see it and stop what we’re doing. Okay?”

You nod.

“Daddy?” You hear Jeno ask quietly.

“Yes?” Jaemin responds. “I’ve been using this on her, Jeno.” You wish you could see, but you also kind of like that you can’t. You can only hear that they’ve grabbed something, that he’s handed it to Jeno. 

As soon as you hear the pitch of the buzzing, you recognize it as the little clitoral vibrator that Jaemin’s favoring today. 

Jeno’s used it on you before. He’s used several items in your collection with you before, but you’ve never been this sensitive before. It feels like the slightest thing could set you off into a world-ending orgasm. But you know that’s actually not the case.

Jeno knows your body even better than Jaemin, so if they’ve both decided to withhold your orgasms, Jeno’s going to be even better at it than Jaemin.

And as he starts to use the small vibrator on you, you realize just how true that is. He uses it at the exact angle that always feels best angle your clit, moving it in the way that he knows you do when you get yourself off. And right as you start to feel the sweetness of your climax right there on the horizon, he pulls back.

This is worse than Jaemin’s edging. Jaemin had let you get into the middle of that sweet zone before your orgasm. But Jaemin’s only giving you the barest taste before stealing it away, and that’s almost more cruel. He has you in tears within minutes, moaning garbled words into your panty gag, your body twitching, tears soaking the blindfold. 

You can hear the two of them talking to each other, but once again you can’t make out anything they’re actually saying over the sound of your own edged distress.

When Jeno moves back, like you feel him and Jaemin both shifting around the bed, it all stops for a minute. You can hear them moving around, and you whine and moan through your gag, but after another moment you feel them moving back onto the bed, one between your legs, one higher up the bed nearer towards your head. 

They don’t speak. You just hear a different vibrator buzzing, and the second this one touches your clit, your entire body jolts. The vibration stops. You feel the rubbery tip of the toy slipping down along your pussy, back up towards your clit, a brief little buzz that makes you cry out, and then it’s sinking down lower and at last you feel it press inside you, sliding deep and then the switch is flipped and it bursts into vibration again.

There’s no way that they can edge you this time. You slide towards orgasm with no safety to hold you back, and at last you tip over into the sweet bliss of it.

You feel all the tension in your body release at last, your chest arching off the bed, thighs shaking and giving tiny little twitches, and you’re moaning and crying at how good it feels to finally be given this after so long. It just keeps going too, with the vibrator deep inside you, filling you up so well alongside the plug still stretching your ass.

By the time it ends, you should probably feel a little tired, but instead you’re invigorated, hungry for more.

The panties in your mouth are soaked with your drool, and finally whichever one of them is near your head tugs the gag out of your mouth. You draw in a clear breath, making one faint moan before you feel him prod his cock against your bottom lip. 

You open your mouth wider, and he sinks in.

You gag around his cock, but you do your best to breath through your nose and relax your jaw as he starts moving, thrusting down your throat smoothly. And you know it’s probably Jeno. He likes face-fucking you from time to time, and you’re familiar with how deep his cock hits.

Jaemin between your legs is still slowly moving the vibrator inside you, though he’s turned the vibrations down to the lowest setting, but even then you feel like you just might cum again at any second.

You get confirmation that it’s Jeno fucking your mouth when he moans, his hands in your hair tugging, bouncing your throat on his cock. You moan as Jaemin hits the vibrator somewhere inside you that stimulates the plug, giving you double the vibrating pleasure for a moment. 

“Ah, I’m gonna cum,” he moans, pulling you down as far as he can on his cock. “Should I cum in your mouth or on your face, sweetheart? Paint you like Jaeminnie did?”

You moan, your throat convulsing around him as you feel the sudden urge to breathe, and Jeno takes that as answer enough.

He pulls out of your mouth quickly, his fingers bumping against your lips as he fists his cock in his hurrry to cum.

With a deep moan, Jeno cums over your face. You hurry to catch it on your tongue, licking around your lips, wishing your tongue was long enough to be able to reach it all. 

“Here, baby,” Jaemin says, and then you feel his helpful fingers dragging across your face, gathering cum on his fingers, and he presses them into your mouth. You suck hungrily on his fingers, cleaning them thoroughly, and the moment after his fingers leave your mouth, Jaemin’s diving in to kiss you.

You assume it’s Jaemin, but it could also be Jeno whose hands you feel in your hair and on your face, pushing the blindfold up, tugging it off your face and throwing it aside. By the time you open your eyes, there’s no telling which one of them it was because they’re both right there in front of you. Jeno moves in to kiss you before Jaemin’s even fully gone.

It’s definitely Jaemin though who reaches up to untie your hands. Your fingers are cramped from holding onto that vibrator for so long without needing it, so you drop it. Your wrists and arms ache slightly when you move them to wrap around Jeno’s shoulders. A second later, the ties on your ankles are released too. 

You feel gentle hands on your body, two sets of them as your boyfriends move you around. Jeno lies down on his back, holding you on his lap, and Jaemin presses up behind you, his fingers touching the plug in your ass.

“Want us both to fuck you, baby?” 

“Thought you weren’t going to let me cum?” You ask instead of answering his question. “Why did you?”

“You’re too pretty.” Jeno touches your cheek lightly, and you look down into his eyes, his sweet face, at his kissed lips. “He decided you’d been punished enough.” 

“And you’re letting us both fuck you at the same time, so you deserve a reward for that,” Jaemin says, sliding his palm flat up your back. “Do you want it now?”

You nod, sinking down to sit completely on Jeno’s thighs, straightening up so you’re looking down at Jeno’s whole chest while Jaemin’s chest presses against your back. “I’m fine with now. Are you two?”

Jaemin, in answer, presses his erection against your ass cheek. “Just so you know, watching you cum like that, followed by Jeno cumming across your face and you sucking my fingers like you were blowing my cock, yeah, it was probably one of the hottest things ever. So of course I’m ready.”

Jeno lifts a hand to your chest, palming one of your tits. “You know if you sit on my cock, I’ll be fully hard in like two minutes at the most. But Jaeminnie wants your ass, pretty girl. So why don’t you sit on my cock, and he can do his part.”

Jeno’s still half-hard when you lift yourself up and then guide him inside you. Your thighs tremble a little as you sink down his length, but his hands as well as Jaemin’s settle on your hips. You bite your lip and close your eyes to savor the feeling. Jeno’s been busy lately, so you’ve been turning to Jaemin a lot for your pleasure, and it’s been a little while since you had Jeno inside you for more than just a quickie. 

“You want to lean forward a little?” Jaemin says softly from behind you, his hand pressing slightly between your shoulders. You do lean over Jeno, and you feel Jaemin’s hand slide back down your spine and over your tailbone and then there’s a tug in your belly as he starts to move the plug, thrusting it in and out of you a few times before he starts to bring it out.

You moan and drop your head to Jeno’s shoulder. He lifts his arms around you, rubbing your back, and Jaemin’s got one hand on your tailbone moving soothingly while the other works.

You cry out a little when the plug slips out, when you feel your empty entrance clenching around nothing.

“So cute,” Jaemin croons, and you feel one of his fingers slip inside you. He moves it around, slipping another one in, making sure that you’re stretched enough for him. “Jeno, can you reach the lube?”

Jeno grabs the bottle from earlier, passing it behind you to Jaemin, and you feel him once again use a generous amount of lube, spreading it all around you hole, fingering it into you, slicking his cock with it. Your body is certainly reacting to knowing that you’re about to get your ass fucked, that you’re about to be double-stuffed. 

“Hey,” Jeno speaks softly, turned his head to the side to brush his lips against your ear. “Are you okay? Still good? We can stop?”

Does he feel your heart pounding against his chest? Are you clenching around him? Does he not actually want this? No, you know that last one isn’t true. Jeno’s back to full hardness inside you at this point. 

“I want you both. I’m just nervous. I’ve never been double penetrated.” You press a soft kiss to his shoulder. “I’ll be fine.”

“Just breathe, baby,” Jaemin tells you, and then he’s pulling his fingers out of you, lining his cock up. “Just breathe, and tell me if you want me to stop. Okay?”

You nod, but you can’t find it in you to speak at that moment. Jeno slides a hand from your back to find your hand and lace your fingers together. He squeezes. 

Jaemin moves slowly. He took care with you earlier when he fingered you open, so you’re not sure why it surprises you that he’s so careful now. He moves slowly, small rocks of his hips forward, and you do feel yourself relaxing as you take deep steadying breaths.

You feel so full even when he’s only a little bit in. Jeno’s a pretty thick guy, and Jaemin’s not too small either, so you just need to breathe, need Jaemin to go slow so you have time to adjust.

When Jaemin bottoms out, you hold your breath, tucking your face against Jeno’s chest. You let the breath out. You’ve never felt this full before. They give you a few moments, and then Jaemin gives an experimental thrust.

You whimper, and he freezes, but you shake your head. “Do it again.”

So he does. 

You’ve had anal before so the different kind of pleasure that comes with having sex like that isn’t new to you. But the surprise when Jeno starts moving as well, now that makes your eyes roll. The stretched feeling, the never-ending pleasure, the sweet burn and pull and just completeness of it all is overwhelmingly good.

The three of you find a rhythm that works. As you grow more relaxed and more comfortable with it, you push up from Jeno’s chest, and that shift in angles opens up a whole new side to this. Jeno’s hands rove from your hips to your thighs and back again, massaging your hips to pull you down on his cock, and then sliding around to brush his fingers in dizzying circles against your clit. Jaemin’s arms slide around your front, bringing you against your chest, his hands on your tits, his mouth against your neck. 

You knew that you would love being caught between them both, but the fantasy of it is nothing compared to the reality which soon has you swirling down into a space where you can’t even think anymore. All you know is the feeling of the two of them inside you, their hands on your body, their mouths on your throat and your cheeks. Jeno sat up at some point and brought your mouth to his, laughing as he kisses you, murmuring, “You’re so loud, sweetheart.”

And you’re not even aware of moaning, but surely it’s a constant stream of moans and their names and swearing, crying that you’re going to cum, and then doing it. You feel yourself shaking between your boyfriends bodies. 

Jaemin cums moments later, biting down on your shoulder as his hips crash forward again and again, driving you into a fresh orgasm, and he pulls out quickly, cumming across your lower back.

You turn your head away from Jeno’s mouth, and he takes no offense, mouthing his way down your throat to your chest, taking one of your nipples into his mouth. Jaemin lets you tangle your hands in his hair, pulling his mouth to yours as he curls around you to kiss you, 

Jaemin’s hands settling down on your hips, helping you to ride Jeno, to get your other boyfriend to cum. 

Jeno presses his hands to your tits, squishing them together as he cums, his face buried against the softness of your chest as he moans and spills deep inside you. 

None of you move for a few moments. 

Jeno’s breaths come hot and heavy against your chest. You and Jaemin keep kissing, and you can’t think of anything past this--this moment right here, totally entangled with your two boyfriends, who you love so deeply.

But eventually Jeno lifts his head. Eventually Jaemin helps you off Jeno’s lap, and he lies down with you, curling around you, brushing your hair out of your face, kissing your cheeks and talking to you softly, telling you how good you did for him and Jeno today. Jeno lies down in front of you, looking you in the eye, holding one of your hands in his up against his lips. 

You just feel so loved and safe there between the two of them. 

It’s some time later, you’re not exactly sure how much later, but you wake in your bed. The sheets are absolutely wrecked. Your body is sore but you don’t feel all sticky and gross, so one of them must have cleaned you up after you dropped off. Jeno’s asleep in front of you, and on his other side is Jaemin also sleeping, his arm slung across Jeno’s hips.

The two of them have always been attached at the hip, you realize, like a package deal. And you hope they stay like that forever, although there had been a time, back before any of this really began, that you had wished that they could just stay apart for long enough that you could be alone with Jeno. Now you wish for the opposite.

You once learned that Jeno without Jaemin meant that you got fucked quite well, and now you know that having the two of them together makes it even better.

The End.

a/n: oh. my. god. this really was a long one, like in terms of length and also the amount of time that it’s taken me to write it lol, and it didn’t help that halfway through I decided to erase a good portion of what I’d written and completely rework it. But I hope the wait has been worth it and you’ve loved it! 

This was based off a message I received during the member days I did from late-March to mid-April, and it’s now mid-May and I’ve finally finished it (oops). All I know is that the music video Just So You Know by Jesse McCartney was a huge influence on part of this plot, and I’m really glad I didn’t try to rush writing this to fit it in before the end of Jaemin day 

#jeno smut #jaemin smut #nomin #nomin smut #nct dream smut #nct smut