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feyascorner · 4 months

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wish you would look at me

summary. convinced that you’re in love with another, when you approach him with a serious expression, he readies himself for the inevitable—rejection. but is it ever that simple?

pairing. astarion x GN!reader

warnings. light angst, fluff

a/n. this is inspired by the ppl who have love triangles w gale and astarion in act 2 and what he says if you pick him bec when I saw that I almost cried pls let him be happy

If you asked him a few weeks ago, he’d laugh at the mere suggestion that he could ever be jealous of someone like Gale. That blasted wizard couldn't go four steps before begging for a magical shoe or pathetically limping his way behind the rest of the group while you frantically searched for the said shoe. And when he found out the wizard was a few errors away from exploding, somehow Astarion felt even more pity (not really) for the lad.

Yet here he was.

He’s not sure when the hell you and Gale had gotten so chummy, but it rubbed him the wrong way. Even if his expression would never show it. He sips at his wine while Karlach and Wyll continue to chat about God knows what, too busy peering from the corner of his eyes as you lean into Gale’s shoulders to look closer at the book he was holding.

Perhaps the tadpole had finally made you lose your mind. He'd almost dropped his goblet when you denied his invitation to his tent tonight, spouting the excuse that you'd asked Gale to help you with something, and now this?

God knows why you ever found the wizard charming. If Gale could do something, he could too—much better, in fact. He was sure of it.

His grip tightens around the goblet when he hears you laugh.

Sure, his original intentions for approaching you had been less than noble…and he might have seduced you for more selfish reasons than you originally knew, but as much as he hated himself for it, he'd grown rather fond of you. In his own way, of course.

He’d only realized that the anxious squirming in his stomach was not of fear but of affection when you'd defended him from that vile drow at Moonrise Towers. He'd half expected you to ask him to throw himself at her, yet you stood your ground, showing nothing but respect to his own boundaries while you failed to realize that he'd deceived your own.

He truly had no reason to feel this way. He was selfish, he knew, for feeling so possessive because not once had the two of you established being exclusive. Though you'd respected him, you saw him for just that. A friend to respect, and nothing more. Sure, you'd spent a few nights together, but it was a mindless night of passion and he knew he'd continue to be your fling until you found another to truly love. He had just hoped it wouldn't be someone like Gale, of all people…or Wyll…or Shadowheart…or anyone for that matter.

He shakes his head. The wine must be getting to him. Serious relationships aren't a luxury he can afford, he reminds himself, relaxing his shoulders. He’s perfectly okay with being your ally—nothing more or nothing less. Ecstatic, even.

But when Gale flips a page of the book and both of you lean closer again—this time dangerously close—he feels a sharp pain shoot up his hand.

“Uh, Fangs, you alright there?” Karlach stares at the cracked glass in his hand and even he blinks at it in disbelief.

Apparently not.

He sighs irritably, dumping the glass elsewhere. “I’m quite alright. Seems I just need a nice comfortable mattress than a thin bedroll on the ground, but it’ll do for now.”

“Need help patching that up? You're bleeding.”

He almost laughs, if it weren't for the giggle coming from your direction. “Blood’s my specialty, darling, remember?” Without another word, he paces into his tent, closing the flap behind him for the universe signal that screams ‘don’t bother me.’

So when half an hour later, when he no longer hears the crackle of the campfire, he sees your shadow emerge from the other side of his tent flap, he squints.

“Can I come in?” He fails to respond, and hears you shuffle. “Ah, are you asleep?”

At this, he can't help but snort. You instinctively peek inside, and he runs a hand through his hair, sighing in defeat. “If I'd been asleep just how would I answer that question?”

He motions you closer and you take it as a sign to step inside, careful to avoid stepping on any of his belongings before situating yourself in front of him. “It was rhetorical, obviously!”

“Of course,” he doesn't seem convinced, lips curling into a teasing grin. “Now tell me, what brings you to my palace this late at night? Surely not for a cuddle. I'd thought you declined my offer earlier?”

Usually, you'd smile, but instead you only look down at your clasped hands, seemingly in thought. “I needed to talk to you—without everyone else watching.”

The usual brightness to your tone is missing.

Oh, he thinks. You've come to end things with him.

“Ah,” is all he says. He can tell his smile hasn't dropped, but it doesn't feel that way. “I hear you've found a new lover. Perhaps you want to keep yourself for this one, true love? How romantic, darling.”

You frown at this, and he wonders if he’s done something wrong. But it does little to stop his defense mechanisms from springing into action, because he’s immediately slipping into his usual mask, grin stretching wider but never reaching his eyes.

He hates the words coming out of his own mouth as if they taste of poison. Still, his voice is steady, almost teasing. Perks of the 200 years spent shamelessly lying, he supposes. “So, is this the end of our late night trysts? Even though they were an awful lot of fun?”

He doesn’t think he could stand watching you with that damned wizard. He doesn't even want to think about it quite frankly, because all he feels is his chest tighten when he imagines someone else holding you the way he does. And gods, if had to watch Gale’s poor attempt at flirting one more time…

But then again, you'd be with someone who doesn't manipulate you. Someone who doesn't toy with your feelings, or someone who doesn't seduce you for protection.

His smile twitches, and he just braces himself for your response.

“I’d rather be with you.”

He stares at you, eyes wider than its ever been since he'd gotten this damn worm in his brain.

“What? Why?” he blurts, embarrassingly so, before he composes himself again and clears his throat. “I mean, well, I know why—but I thought you'd had something more…with Gale.”

As much as he despises the idea, he'd seen the way you'd laughed with him. And while it was a new experience for him to be fond of another person, he'd found that these feelings had led him to rather you be happy than dragging you down with him. If it meant you wouldn't regret your choice, he’d been willing to deal with it.

So why?

“I want something real with you, Astarion,” you say softly, eyes meeting his. “I don't know if you feel the same way, but Gale and I are better off as friends, and I told him before I came here. And besides, it’d be cruel of me to lead him on while my heart is with another.”

He thinks he might have died again just now. For the first time in decades, he’s actually at a loss for words. “I—if that's what you truly want—we can try. Be lovers, I mean.”

You finally smile at his words, and Gods above if that doesn't lift the excruciating weight of the past few weeks off his shoulders. He feels the warmth of your lips when you lean forward to give him a peck on the cheek, everything happening so fast that his mind is spinning. He snaps back into focus when you pull back.

“I’ve wanted to do that for a while.”

You could have—should have, done it earlier. With a smile of his own, he leads you back to him, this time planting a soft kiss on your lips. It’s short, and not nearly enough, but it’ll do for tonight.

“Well then, consider yourself wholeheartedly taken then, my dear.”

#astarion ancunin #baldur's gate 3 #baldur's gate astarion #bg3 astarion #astarion x reader #astarion x tav #astarion #bg3 x reader #fluff #angst with a happy ending

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azrielbrainrot · 4 months

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Maybe We Could Be The Start of Something

Band member!Azriel x College Student!Reader

Description: Your friends invite you to a bar and you could never imagine who you'd meet there.

Word Count: 3294

Warnings: none

Notes: I had this idea after seeing this art and couldn't stop thinking about it. I actually had a lot of ideas for little stories in this universe but it makes sense to start with how they met. Also I know that's a terrible band name but I never had to name a band before okay. I didn't proofread this because I think I'd delete the whole thing if I did, sorry. This is really self-indulgent but I hope you like it!

part of the band au

You could only blame yourself for agreeing to meet Viviane. Your skull felt like it was going to split open with this headache that has lasted all week. The only thing you wanted to do right now was try to sleep it off under your warm blankets, but instead you willingly came to a bar knowing it was just going to make it worse.

She's been telling you about this place and the bands that perform here occasionally for ages. Apparently it's a real hotspot for up and coming musicians ever since two bands made it big after starting out here. You've been turning her down for weeks so you had promised her that you'd finally come this friday, of course when you agreed you couldn't have known your week was going to be absolute shit. Though most of your days have been shit lately. That might be the actual reason Viv has been so insistent about you going out with her, she knew your mental health was ready to take a vacation and was just being a good friend.

This really hadn't been a good day to come though. Aside from your headache, your last class had also run late, making you lose your bus and barely have time to drop everything off at home and change to come meet your friends. As a little treat you also couldn't find your nice black skirt so you had to just wear jeans, you definitely needed the extra confidence the pretty skirt provided but the universe didn't seem to care about that.

The bar was already packed by the time you got there, you were almost being pushed around while you were searching for your friends. You look down at your phone to ask them where they are and see a text from Viv asking if you're still coming. Reading it makes you stop in your tracks. You can't really blame her for thinking you wouldn't show up since you've been declining every invitation lately, but seeing that she thought you wouldn't even give her a heads up hurt a little. You knew you had been distant lately but you were trying your best to deal with life and you never meant to do it at the expense of your friendships.

You're pushed out of your thoughts when someone taps your shoulder gently, making you look back at them. Turning your head you were faced with a muscular chest, slowly looking up a tattooed neck to meet beautiful hazel eyes staring back at yours.

“I'm sorry to bother you,” he says, breaking eye contact for a second before continuing, “but I think you dropped this.” He raises his hand so you can see him holding your keys. Your house keys, the ones you would undoubtedly only notice were missing when you went back home and tried to open the door. That would have been the cherry on the cake after this whole day. Maybe you should see a witch to make sure it's not actually a curse, no one should experience this much bad luck.

“Thank you so much,” you almost yell as you grab them from his hand in excitement. He just saved you from having no place to sleep tonight. You notice him tensing up when your fingers brush against his hand and realize you might have made him uncomfortable. “I'm sorry,” you take a tiny step back in the crowded bar, “I would have been locked out of my apartment if you hadn't seen that. Thank you.”

“You're welcome.” he said, giving you a nod and something close to a smile, before going on his way. You curse yourself again for acting so awkwardly. You hope you didn't make him feel uncomfortable, he was nice in picking up your keys and giving them back to you. He was also really cute which only made it more of a shame that you met like this. At least you didn't lose your keys, that would have seriously sucked.

Making your way to the table Viviane told you they would be at, you notice almost everyone is here. She was leaning against her boyfriend, Kallias, while they listened to whatever story Alba was telling them about. Ezio and Celia were both looking down at their phones and showing each other something while giggling like schoolgirls. As much as you love your friends, you don't know how much socializing you can handle today. You already fucked up what could have been a very simple interaction. Then again, with all of them here you know Viv won't try to ask you about Eleanor so at least you can keep avoiding hard topics. Viv greets you with a grin as soon as she sees you, everyone following right after.

“Hey, thought you weren't coming after all.” Yeah, you almost forgot about that. You smile anyway, knowing she didn't mean to remind you of how much of a bad friend you've been lately.

“Sorry, guys,” you sit down in the empty chair next to Alba before continuing, “Class ran late and then I lost my bus.”

“Oh. Bad luck.” You have no idea, Kallias. Conversation picked back up after that and you let them do most of the talking, taking a back seat and just watching them. You're glad that they either noticed you weren't in a talking mood or just didn't realize you were mostly quiet anyway.

You have no new stories to tell them since you've barely been functioning outside of school and talking about your feelings is definitely a resounding no, especially at a bar, so you just let them keep up with their conversations and just nod along every once in a while.

Eventually, the DJ introduces the band playing tonight. The Night Court. Judging by the screams and the way everyone moves closer to watch, they're very popular around here and you understand part of the reason for said popularity as soon as you see them step up on stage.

“Oh, they're really good!” Viviane's voice pulls you out of your thoughts. “The guitarist is Mor's cousin. You remember her, right?” You nod. Of course you do. The blonde with sparkly eyeshadow and red lips leaves a big impression, forgetting Morrigan is probably impossible.

You study the guitarist as he introduces himself and the band. He's extremely handsome, the type of handsome that would make you think he can't be human, like some kind of fairy or vampire. You can tell he's aware of this fact with every honey dipped word that comes out of his mouth, literally flirting with the whole crowd. Despite not having many physical similarities with Mor, that allure he exudes definitely matches with hers.

The drummer was already sitting in place, looking eager to play. It takes you a second to notice he was in fact already sitting down as he's probably one of the tallest men you've ever seen in real life. But, with the messy shoulder length hair and big boyish grin on his face, he doesn't look scary at all.

As your eyes travel to the bassist, half hidden in the shadows, you wonder why you didn't recognize him immediately. It was the same guy that helped you before. You had thought he was beautiful before but, considering the situation, you didn't have much time to linger on that fact. However now that he was standing on stage, you could fully appreciate it. He was tall - this much you knew since you were at head level with his chest - and by the way his arms strained against his black t-shirt as he picked up his bass, you could tell he was fit too. He was looking down at the bass in his hands, making the few lights that caught him cast an ethereal glow on his face and on his onyx hair. This man looks like he stepped right down heaven's gates.

They start playing what you think is an original song but can't be sure since you were too distracted checking their bassist out to hear what Mor's cousin had said. He does have a really good singing voice but as your mystery angel starts singing, you can't help but feel bewitched back to watching him.

You barely take your eyes off him during the whole performance but they're all undeniably good. It's easy to understand why this bar is so popular if this is the level of talent their bands have. You can definitely imagine them making it big. They all seem very comfortable and content on stage and the crowd can't get enough of them.

You're so distracted by them that you don't even notice your head pounding anymore, or how fast time flies because, before you know it, they're saying their goodbyes to the crowd and leaving the stage.

Conversation starts back up after that, everyone is gushing about how talented and hot they are and you find yourself easily agreeing with their sentiments. But, with no distraction and the dj back playing songs you've heard a thousand times and the pressure of keeping conversation going, your headache comes back. You wait out just a little longer until you think it's an acceptable time to leave without worrying everyone too much.

“I'm sorry guys but I think I'm going to head home.” You finish the last of your drink even though it's mostly melted ice by that point and start putting your jacket on.

“Already?” You're not surprised Alba is the first to speak up. You'll never understand how this girl has so much energy, you had the same morning class as her but she's still as energetic as she was at lunchtime.

“It's still kind of early,” Viviane looks up at you with her icy eyes and you can recognize the concern in them immediately.

“It was just a busy week,” you explain with a smile on your face, hoping no one reads too much into it even though you all know that's not all. “I think I need to go sleep it off.”

“Are you going by yourself though?” Out of everyone at the table, Enzo is the worst one at hiding his emotions. You can see as clear as day that he's worried about you.

“I'll get an uber. Don't worry.” You gesture to your phone hoping they'll drop it.

“I can wait with you outside.” Kallias offers immediately, ever the responsible one. You really wanted to stay alone right now though.

“You don't have to.” You put your bag over your shoulder to add some finality to your words. “It's cold and there's going to be enough cars out at this hour, I won't be waiting for long.” It looks like he's about to say more but Viv puts a hand over his arm subtly, making him shut up. The bass of the music keeps hammering at your head so you don't linger and just say your goodbyes, waving at everyone with what you hope is a seemingly content smile, before leaving.

As soon as you step outside the pressure you feel starts slowing down. The front of the bar is still full of people so you walk a bit more to the little parking lot on this street. The air is cold but it feels amazing after being in the stuffed bar and your thoughts don't seem so overbearing when you don't have to try to act happy with your friends.

You love them to death but everything about how tonight went just proves that they've been talking about you behind your back. You know this is just them being good friends. You've been acting so differently in these last few months that even one of your professors noticed so it's only natural that they also did, but knowing everyone can tell only makes it worse.

You didn't want to make anyone worry about you. Life has just been going for your throat lately, minor inconveniences keep popping up and piling on top of what was already a pretty shitty situation. But you know once the semester ends, you'll get the chance to finally breathe and solve some of the problems you've been ignoring. And then things will hopefully get better. It just really sucks that your friendships and even school life has been affected by this.

Sitting down on top of the small wall that wrapped around the parking lot, you look up at the sky, willing your mind to let you rest for a bit. Watching the stars twinkling and your breath turn into white clouds of smoke because of the cold. You should probably get that uber and go home before any of your friends find you here, but your body doesn't want to move for some reason.

You feel someone approach you and look back down to meet familiar hazel eyes. You both stare at each other for a second longer than what would be normal, not expecting to see each other again.

“We keep running into each other,” you can hear his voice better here. You didn't notice how deep it was in the crowded bar. His singing voice is also deep but a bit softer than this.

“Yeah.” You smile. Seeing him again after how he helped you and then watching him on stage is making you a little giddy despite your somber mood. He seems a bit less unsure after you respond as well.

“Are you here alone?” He asks as he stuffs his hands in his pockets.

“No, I'm just waiting for an uber.” You hope you're not making a bad impression again. He probably hadn't seen you with your friends before either.

“Alright,” he looks over to what you assume is his car and then back to you, “I can wait here with you.”

“You don't have to. It's cold,” you start but he shakes his head before you even finish speaking, “I actually haven't called it yet.” He gives you a look of amusement and it just makes you try to explain yourself faster. “I have a headache. The cold just felt calming. I'll get it now.” Opening the app, you start searching and, just like you expected, there's a car barely 10 minutes away from you. A wave of disappointment washes over you at the thought that you won't get to talk to him for longer but you push it aside quickly, you barely know him.

“A bar probably isn't the best place to be if you have a headache,” he tilts his head slightly in what you're almost sure is concern. He's a little hard to read.

“I know but I already had told my friends I was coming so…” You shrug and change the subject, trying to allow this moment to let you forget about your earlier thoughts. “Didn't turn out too bad. There was this really good band playing today.” You can see a flush take over his cheeks and the tips of his ears and you feel incredibly proud of yourself for being the reason behind it.

“I'm glad you liked it,” he says as he dips his head slightly in thanks. You feel like this might be the best compliment you could have given him.

“You were all really good. I even forgot about my headache while I was watching you play,” you try not to sound too excited and make it weird but you want him to know how good his band is, “Do you perform here a lot?”

“Yeah,” he leans sideways against the wall next to you, “At least twice a month.” You're starting to notice that, although his face doesn't show too much emotion, his eyes are a little more expressive. His band seems to be a topic he likes talking about. You can understand why.

“Isn't that a big deal? I heard this bar is really popular nowadays, there has to be a lot of bands trying to perform here.” The blush seems to be back but it could also be because of the cold you're subjecting him to.

“We always try to do our best but we've been playing here for a long time. That helps too.”

“You know that's not it,” you point to the entrance of the bar, where some people are smoking, “The bar was packed. I don't know if that's how it always is but I'm pretty sure it was mostly people wanting to watch you perform.”

“You've never been here before?” It looks like he's getting a bit embarrassed by the praise so you let him change the subject.

You shake your head. “Need to come more often though. When are you performing again?”

“We don't always have a schedule,” he looks down at your phone in your hands then back up at you, “But I can text you the details.”

“Oh.” He wants your number. The thought makes warmth rush to your cheeks. “Alright.” You unlock your phone and hand it to him. While he's typing his number, you can't help but notice the scars on his hand. They completely cover his hands, the skin completely marred. It looks as if they were burned. You look away from them, not wanting to make him uncomfortable by staring. He hands you your phone back and you see he saved his number under his name.

“Azriel,” you say the name out loud, tasting it in your mouth. He's watching you a little more intensely than before and you have to break eye contact to stop yourself from blushing. You quickly send him a text so he can save your number as well.

“I'll need yours too.” You give him your name and he repeats it, just as you had done. He makes it sound beautiful in his warm timbre and you can't help the flutter in your stomach. “I'll text you as soon as I find out when we're coming here next.”

“Okay.” You lock eyes and don't look away, just enjoying the moment, until you see a car pass by and realize it's yours.

You think you could have stayed there in the cold talking to him all night. You're not sure why but talking to him is effortless, it's like you've been friends for years. It just feels right and you find yourself wishing that he texts you soon with the concert information and anything else he comes up with. You wouldn't need much of an excuse to talk to him.

“That's my ride,” You say as you hop down from the wall. He looks at the car and when his eyes meet yours again you think you can see a hint of disappointment, hopefully at having to cut the moment short. “Thank you for waiting with me,” you smile at him again, “You didn't have to do that.”

“No problem.” He gives you a smile too, the biggest one you've seen on him. “I'll see you next time.”

“Of course.” You'd be an idiot to not want to see him again. You linger for as long as you can, suddenly not feeling like going home at all.

You wave at him again before getting in the car and something beats faster in your chest when he waves back and watches the car speed off down the street, it's almost like your heart is telling you to stay with him. You're not exactly sure what just happened but you hope you don't regret not staying with him for the rest of the night.

You keep thinking about him during the whole car ride and he's the last thing on your mind when you're laying down to sleep. And when he texts you the next day you know you'll have many more opportunities to spend the night talking to him.

#azriel x reader #azriel x you #azriel x y/n #azriel fluff #azriel fic #azriel acotar #azriel shadowsinger #divider by saradika #band au

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famwhy · 10 months

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Bereavement (2)

noun

/bɪˈriːv.mənt/ The state one is in when losing someone important to them

Spiderman: Across the Spiderverse

42! Miles X F!Reader, 1610! Miles X F!Reader

Synopsis: Miles is missing, and all you can think about is getting him back. Upon finally finding him, however, you're taken aback by the copy that stands beside him—the same copy that was staring at you with wide, shaking eyes full of... disbelief?

Note: I can't—for the life of me—believe how many notes the first part got after just a few days of being out, you guys are actually insane. Thank you all so much. And thank you too, Kingpin, for giving me the idea in the first place lmao. (Do me a huge solid and lemme know if any of my Spanish needs some work, I studied it for 3 years but it's been over a year since it's been put to practice so I'm a little rusty)

Miles would never drop you, not in a million years—you knew that.

Something had stopped him, forced him to let go as he froze in time; in an assortment of colours he couldn't control—that was how you found yourself where you were now—free-falling to your death for what was perhaps the second time in your life.

"Y/N!"

It was a lot scarier the first time—you had to admit—when you fell from the glass room right beside the huge collider more than a year ago. At the time, Miles had insisted you stay away from his spider business for your own safety, but you—being you—followed him down anyway.

That was your first mistake.

Your second—however—came in the form of letting Kingpin know you were there after allowing quite the ridiculous sneeze out of your mouth. And once he saw you, it wasn't hard for him to pick you up and throw you through the shattered glass in his rage and dismay of his failed plan.

Miles had his back completely turned to you when it happened, and yet—somehow—he was the first to whip his head around and notice your quickly descending form.

"Y/N!"

You had come so close to the ground—seconds away from touching it—when that familiar warmth wrapped its way around your waist, carrying you through the wind to prop you onto your own little cloud of safety.

Ever since then, Miles refused to leave your side. He took you out on every mission he went to—pretty much every news station had you pinned down as 'Spiderman's girl' and he never bothered to correct them.

So even as Gwen went off to another dimension, Miles grabbed you before following after. Even as he was invited to the headquarters of this 'spider society', he refused to go without them also granting you permission inside too.

When you asked him why he went to such lengths for you, he simply replied, "I almost lost you once while being in the same dimension as you, if you think I'm going to let it even come close to happening again, you've got another thing coming."

So no, you didn't find the second time you were falling to your death all that scary. Not when you knew Miles would save you—

"I've got you, cariño."

—you just didn't exactly know that it would be the other one that did.

His arms were wound tightly around the underside of your knees and upper back—carrying you so intimately, looking at you with so much love in his eyes, you found yourself growing slightly flustered.

...okay, very flustered.

"Oh, Cariño," as he spoke, he didn't lose the breath in his tone—the gentle air of disbelief he took on since your arrival, "you're here. I can't believe it—you're here. Te extrañé mucho." ("I missed you so much.")

You were speechless, gaping up at him like a clueless fish—what else could you do? You were being held in the arms of a copy of your best friend after he basically just confessed to you because the 'you' in this universe was apparently dead.

Though, luckily for you, there was no need to say a word for he continued speaking with those soft, fond eyes, "I missed your smile and your laugh. I missed how you always used to tug me around whenever something caught your eye... and how you would go on and on about whatever show was your new obsession of the month. You were always so... pretty when you spoke passionately.

"Speak for me, cariño," he continued, "let me hear that pretty voice of yours again."

"I—" you were stuttering—why were you stuttering?—"I, uh..."

Pull yourself together, Y/N.

"Miles—"

"Ah, I just realised how much I missed the way you say my name."

"—guh!" How the hell was he spitting such smooth lines? "Miles! Just listen for a minute, okay?!"

"Of course, mamí."

"I— I'm not who you think I am. I mean, I am Y/N but I'm not your Y/N. And you're not my Miles."

As the words came tumbling out your mouth, the boy's—this earth's Miles'—lips tugged down, gaze hardening and grip around you ever-so-slowly growing tighter.

"Don't be silly, mamí, of course I'm your Miles. I always have been and always will be."

Your brows furrowed and your eyes trailed to the view behind him, moving rapidly as you tried to locate your best friend. Though, soon, your view of the sky was cut off by the male with braids once more.

"What are you doing?" A growl. "Stop looking for him, look at me. I'm right here. He dropped you."

"He glitched! This isn't his world so of course he would, it wasn't his fault!"

You were quick to defend him—he was your best friend so of course you were. There was no way you were having anyone accuse him of anything negative, even himself.

"Cariño, you almost died. Again. He can't take care of you." Miles narrowed his eyes, as if just the thought pissed him off; as if he had the right to be pissed off.

"Oh what?" You scoffed. "And you can? I'm my own person, I don't need to be taken care of."

Stubbornly, you found yourself pulling away from him—or well, attempting to at least, he didn't seem to want to let you though, judging by the way his claws slowly began to dig into you a little.

His eyes were narrowed and his lips were tugged down, gaze seeming to pierce through you—as though he was trying to use you as a vessel to glare at the person he was really mad at.

Though, soon, the expression was gone, replaced by sullen eyes and an almost-far-away look—glossed over in a cloudy haze full of what you could only assume to be the grand despair that was grief; grief over a loss so great, it would pain someone to even admit it ever happened.

"Cariño, please. I don't want to argue with you, I just got you back. Please."

The look on his face, the crack in his voice—it was all too much, you almost couldn't stomach it, and soon, your arms loosened up as you lost the will to pull away.

"Miles," you whispered, "I... I'm really sorry—"

"Don't be, you're here with me now, aren't you? We can make up for all that lost time."

"I can't." Your vision blurred as you shook your head from side-to-side. "I'm sorry, I can't."

For a moment, all was silent. No words were exchanged, leaving only the strong wind to howl in your ears; to warn you of your grave mistake and whisper taunts into your ears. Then—

"It's because of him, isn't it?"

You almost couldn't muster words. "Huh?"

"The other me—it's because of him that you won't stay with me, isn't it?"

The look in his eyes was something of a dark nature, swirling with malice; with hate so inextricibly deep, you almost couldn't believe your own eyes—because... because there was just no way, right? There was no way your Miles (or any other Miles for that matter) could exhibit such a lethal level of loathing towards anyone...

"If I get rid of him, it won't be so much of a problem anymore... sí?"

...or was there?

@justmare, @majestichugs, @milktealvrr, @ladyfairenvale, @sakura-onesan, @haunted-pass, @phoenixgurl030, @stupendousnightmaretrash, @ultimate-geek14, @liaaa-1, @sluslutts, @angrypomeranianwifey, @thatbeanieboss, @kkate8008, @lilslmao, @honeydewpie, @elenasstxarr, @sloverr, @quartzangel0, @crystalsinwater, @astrosdelululand, @sflame15-blog, @nightshxdex, @dottoresgarden, @crowshiny, @teamowolverine, @bangtannie7, @k0la22, @kissmxcheek, @myloveforreading, @jared-oranges, @shisuishoe, @veryfancydoilies, @sunshinesetsstuff, @lovefks, @omg-the-nutella-queen, @hazzapotter, @levanneisdumb, @angie2274, @blueberrystigma

#miles morales #spiderman: across the spiderverse #spiderman atsv #across the spiderverse #female reader #miles morales x reader #earth 42 miles morales x reader #earth 42 miles #earth 42 miles x reader #prowler miles #earth 42 #earth 42 miles morales #miles morales prowler #spiderverse

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mearcatsreturns · 3 months

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I have a bookstagram, and I recently followed someone because they posted about the overconsumption issue that most bookish social media seems to have. Today, though, they posted another controversial "opinion": that listening to audiobooks isn't reading, and people who claim to have read a bunch of books that they listened to as audiobooks are lying and/or deluded. Listening to audiobooks, she said, is just consuming books.

I disagreed in a fairly politely worded reply, and I intend to unfollow/block, because I find it unlikely this person will change their mind, especially since I'm far from the only person to point out that this is exclusionary and ableist. But this is tumblr/my house, and now I'm going to be as blunt as I want to be.

I'm a librarian and archivist. So much of the work I and others in my field do focuses on making books and reading more accessible and less exclusionary. It is, in fact, incredibly ableist to negate how important audiobooks are for people who have certain disabilities or challenges, and I would in no universe say they aren’t reading. For that matter, a busy person who only has time for audiobooks and for people who just prefer them--it still counts, as far as I'm concerned.

See, there's a difference between an audiobook and a podcast or long song or radio program. An audiobook is still a book--it was written with a particular narrative structure, and the author plays a defined but limited role (once the book is written, it's written; the author isn't tuning in next episode with comments and corrections based on what listeners said). An audiobook is a book, ergo, listening to one is reading. Using braille is reading, and listening to audiobooks is reading.

The part that has me in full Captain Raymond Holt "apparently that is a trigger for me" mode is that this bookstagrammer called listening to audiobooks consumption. In the context of her other posts about overconsumption as an issue in the bookish community (again, agree, but also...mind your own business), this seems particularly insidious to me. Conflating influencer-driven (and capitalist hellscape) consumption with listening to an audiobook (again, a massive boon for the visually impaired and those with disabilities like ADHD, dyslexia, etc.) is rude at best and dangerously exclusionary at worst. Stop letting comparison be the thief of joy; mind your own business and stop looking at the pages that bother you. Focus on the kindness of leaning towards inclusion, meeting people where they are, and leaving judgment behind.*

*This person also said "feel free to comment if you disagree but please don't be mean or judgmental," as if they hadn't just posted the most ableist and judgmental sludge I've seen today.

tl;dr: don’t be a gatekeeping shithead, mind your own business, and

(gif by matalyn on tenor, couldn't find on tumblr)

#books #bookstagram #reading #bookish culture #audiobooks #inclusivity #i am honestly so brave for not arguing with more people #I didn't become a lawyer because I didn't want to monetize my number one hobby (arguing)#this person says they're getting a PhD and writing a dissertation on publishing #so I worry that people will lend their posts a certain weight they don't deserve #so here I am: I've literally taken graduate courses in the history of books and the text as a concept.#i specialized in that. it's what I intend to get a PhD in if I decide I'm insane enough to go back to grad school #anyway trust me bro (gender neutral)#(i won't die on ANY hill but i sure will on a whole lot)

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bbobpul · 8 months

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break my heart again 2 — njm

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader SUMMARY.how's jaemin gonna give back for all of y/n's efforts now that he finally can? it's been years—just how much has everything changed? GENRE. angst, fluff, she fell first 🤭 W/C. 3.5k NOTE. hello, part two is here! so sorry i couldn't make a taglist. i didn't have time to make one. nevertheless, i hope this fic make its way back to you. love u all and thankies sm !!!! also, my requests are open !!!

(⁠☉⁠｡⁠☉⁠)⁠!⁠→ my other works !!!!!! part one here!!

i find it hard to picture myself ever being as dedicated to something or someone again, just like how i dedicated my entire college life to na jaemin.

lately, i've been feeling like i forgot what it's like to actually have a dream. back then, na jaemin was my dream, he was my driving force. i would force myself to wake up so early in the morning just so i could see him (or his car) enter the gates of the university. i would go to school even though i am sick and feel a lot better when i get home because i saw na jaemin. but now two years after graduating, i still haven't found a decent job that i actually enjoy.

it's a common experience that many people go through, and i suppose i shouldn't complain about it. maybe i need to put in more effort and push myself harder. part of me wonders if having na jaemin back in my life would rekindle that same sense of dedication that i once had. but as i say these thoughts out loud, they sound absurd, even to myself. why would i wish for my first love to return just so i could find a decent job? why would i long for na jaemin to come back merely to feel that spark in my life again? it's puzzling why i'm even dwelling on thoughts of him and wondering if he holds the key to my happiness and success.

oh, to dream.

oh, for that old dedication to still burn within you.

if only you hadn't acted so dumb that day. could life have taken a different path? are you even happy now? if you hadn't let fear hold you back back then, if you'd actually been brave enough to listen and follow through, would you be happier today?

but no matter how much you keep bothering yourself with that memory, if people come up to you and ask if you feel bad about everything that happened that day, you'd say no. you don't feel bad at all.

deciding to let him go was one of the best things you did. he seemed happy when you left, and after that, you never heard anything about him. he's like a touchy subject in your group of friends, which can be tough sometimes since you share friends. but does it really matter now? him not being in your life probably means he's happier and more peaceful, right?

are you feeling peaceful? is being stuck in a 9-5 job that hardly brought you joy a happy situation? scratch that. did being in that job make you happy? clearly not, as you've just mustered the bravery to quit. and in doing so, you've never felt more joyful.

did you really make the right decision?

just as you were pondering your own question, your phone buzzed on the bedside table. you grabbed it and saw that the caller was renjun, your incredibly patient best friend.

"y/n," he said, his tone becoming unusually serious. "what's up?" you asked. "do you need money?" "yeah?" "here's the deal: our college is putting together a documentary film, and they've chosen your department. but guess what? your old classmates are bombarding me with messages because it looks like you're ignoring them all. frankly, i can't believe you even answered my call," he griped. "wait, hold on. what film? and why would they pick me? are they searching for someone with a post-college life so sad that it belongs in a documentary?" "well, you were practically a legend back in college, so… and apparently, the director specifically wants you, which leads to… well, another issue…" "what's the problem now?" "it's going to be directed by jaemin."

and just like that, you ended the call. but a few seconds later, renjun's call came in again.

"i'm not going to do it." "you stubborn brat." "why him?" "i have no idea!" "why is he even directing? wasn't he studying architecture or something?" "i don't know, y/n. i haven't heard a single thing about him since your graduation." "what do you mean?" "that's not important now, y/n. you're in need of money, right? seize the opportunity. do it for the cash." “so will you do it or will you do it?” “for the cash.”

...

"y/n, you've moved on, haven't you? what's done is done. i'm pretty sure jaemin has forgotten all about it. this chance is coming your way, so just accept it." "i guess i will."

you're drawn in by the idea of making some extra money and the possibility of catching the eye of potential agents or employers. right now, you're at a crossroads, thinking about how this documentary could be a stepping stone to more job opportunities down the line. this situation is different from what usually drives you – this time, it's not about others, it's about focusing on your own goals and aspirations.

you're deliberately avoiding dwelling on your past. just as renjun mentioned, you've moved beyond it. what's done is done. right now, your focus is firmly on the present and the potential that lies ahead in the future.

what's in the past is behind us, including whatever existed between jaemin and you.

from renjun

tomorrow at lunchtime, they'll be going over the schedules and discussing what to film. if you want, you can chat with the director now. his number is 0825 813 2000.

in response, you simply replied with a "okay."

the night before the lunch meeting, a jumble of emotions has you in its grip. the idea of reconnecting with jaemin, who used to be your best friend and is now someone distant, fills you with a sense of awkwardness. you tell yourself that this is about working together and the chance to grow professionally.

after taking a deep breath, you decide to shoot jaemin a text. your fingers hesitate as you type, and the uncertainty you're feeling seems to seep into your message. you finally press send, and your text reads, "hey, it's y/n. heard we're meeting tomorrow for the documentary. just wanted to check in before that."

in almost no time, your phone buzzes with a response: "hey y/n, good to hear from you. yeah, looking forward to our meeting. let's catch up and chat about the project."

the conversation is polite, but beneath the surface, there's an unspoken layer of complexity. you can feel the hesitation in your exchange, a silent recognition of the shared history that's now a distant memory. as you talk about the meeting and the documentary, the easy flow you once had is noticeably absent.

as the texts go back and forth, a sense of tension seems to hang in the air. it's as though the years of friendship you once had are casting a shadow over your conversation. the effortless connection you once shared now requires effort, and both of you can sense the change.

as the conversation wraps up with a simple "see you tomorrow," you're left with a mix of excitement and anxiety. the idea of seeing jaemin again, especially in a professional context, stirs up a range of emotions. this situation is a stark reminder of just how much things have changed – and maybe how some things can't go back to the way they were.

you believed the conversation had concluded, only for your phone to ring once more, bearing yet another message from him. as you read the words on the screen, "i missed you, y/n," a rush of emotions floods over you.

"what's going on with him?" you mutter to yourself, your eyebrows knitting together in confusion. your gaze remains fixed on the message for a moment, your attention drawn to the three blinking dots in the corner – a sign that he's in the process of typing a response. several more seconds tick by, the dots eventually vanishing, and in response, you shut your phone off. you make an attempt to settle into bed and get some rest, but truth be told, it's hard to claim you managed to sleep soundly that night. an undercurrent of thoughts and emotions keeps your mind restless.

the day of lunch lunch finally arrived. you sat across from jaemin, his words forming a distant hum as your thoughts remained clouded and preoccupied. the lingering impact of his recent message kept you in a state of unease, making it difficult to fully engage in the conversation he was leading.

then, something inside you snapped, and you found yourself abruptly interrupting him with a question that had been gnawing at you, "why me?"

he looked at you, his gaze steady, and his response was quick, "why not you?"

your frustration simmered as his words hit you. he was choosing to be cryptic, and it was only adding to your confusion. pushing past your exasperation, you pressed on, "listen, i know we didn't part on the best terms, but why come back now and act like everything's fine? i mean, sure, it's better than hostility, but why choose me? i'm the one who's no longer part of your life."

his expression remained neutral, void of any emotions as he replied, "that's not true."

you raised an eyebrow, challenging him to elaborate. "what's not true?"

"that you have nothing to do with my life, y/n," he stated firmly.

the weight of his words settled heavily between you two, the gravity of the situation growing more apparent. the lunch table had transformed into an arena for confronting unresolved issues.

you scoffed, unable to hold back your disbelief. "jaemin, i made one mistake, and now you're trying to imply that my actions shaped your entire life?"

his eyes held yours, unwavering. "y/n, it's not just about that one mistake. everything that followed, everything that shaped who i am today… it's all connected to you."

your mind reeled, trying to grasp the enormity of what he was suggesting. the complexities of your shared history seemed to crash over you, leaving you grappling with a whirlwind of emotions and a tangled web of unspoken feelings.

the weight of his words left you momentarily speechless, and in an attempt to shift away from the intensity, you sought to change the subject. "where are the other producers? why is it just you here?"

"y/n…" he began, his tone suggesting he wanted to continue the previous conversation.

however, you opted to sidestep the discussion entirely. you pretended as if the profound exchange hadn't just occurred. "i notice you're taking on the role of a director now. quite the career shift, huh?" you inquired, masking your internal turmoil with a casual demeanor. you acted as if there hadn't been a two-year gap in your connection, as though things between you were perfectly ordinary.

he met your gaze, a faint hint of something unreadable in his eyes. "i pursued another dream when i felt i'd lost the chance for my first one."

"your first dream… not architecture, then?" you prodded, curious about the direction he had taken.

he shook his head, a soft chuckle escaping him, leaving you puzzled yet again. "no, not architecture. well, i suppose that just wasn't meant for me back then, but maybe it is now."

the cryptic nature of his response only added to the layers of confusion and intrigue that surrounded him. there was something about the way he spoke that hinted at deeper currents beneath the surface, emotions and experiences that he hadn't fully revealed. you found yourself torn between the desire to push for answers and the instinct to allow him his privacy. the lunch meeting had transformed into a stage for untangling not just the complexities of the documentary but also the intricate web of emotions and history between you and jaemin.

leaving the restaurant, a whirlwind of unanswered questions dances in your mind. yet, for now, you choose to tuck those thoughts away, focusing instead on the looming filming date just a few days away – next saturday.

in the span of time between that lunch and the upcoming shoot, jaemin proves consistent in his attempts to bridge the gap between you two. he regularly reaches out, updating you about his day and proposing get-togethers, which you consistently decline.

the days pass, marked by a series of messages and missed opportunities. despite the undeniable tension, there's an undeniable persistence on jaemin's part, a determined effort to reconnect and reestablish a sense of familiarity. however, your apprehensions and the memories of your past dynamics hold you back, keeping you from embracing his overtures.

as the countdown to the filming day continues, you find yourself in a delicate dance – balancing the unresolved history between you and the prospects of the future. the lines between your personal and professional lives are blurred, and the documentary project becomes a backdrop against which the intricacies of your relationship with jaemin play out.

you find yourself constantly pondering what his intentions could be. his actions leave you wondering, and you can't help but question what he's aiming for. in your perspective, you're merely a negative aspect of his life – a streak of misfortune. you would have expected him to have learned from the past, but his determination remains unshakeable.

as you contemplate these thoughts, your phone lights up once more, bearing yet another message from him. his name on the screen triggers a whirlwind of emotions – a mixture of uncertainty, annoyance, and a hint of curiosity. opening the message, you brace yourself for whatever he might convey this time. the consistency in his attempts at communication only serves to deepen the intricate web of emotions you hold for him, leaving you caught between your shared history and the unpredictability of the present.

"the offer's still there, y/n. :)" "jaemin, let's be real. just because i'm on board with your documentary idea doesn't mean we're suddenly best buds again. a lot has changed." "i want to reconnect, though." "actually, scratch that. i want to get to know you all over again." "jaemin, i appreciate the effort, but let's keep things professional, okay?" “i’m sorry, y/n. goodnight.”

after your straightforward message, his responses ceased. a silence settled in, stretching on until saturday – the day you were set to see him again. the anticipation and uncertainty had been building, and now the moment was finally at hand.

you stepped into the studio and immediately noticed that you and jaemin were the only ones present. your confusion must have been evident on your face, prompting him to address the situation promptly.

"um, the team thought having fewer people in the room would create a more personal atmosphere," he began, his voice carrying a hint of unease. "and, well, they decided to keep me here, you know, being the director and all, and also because we have a history…"

his words trailed off, and there was a subtle vulnerability in his tone. it was as if he was acknowledging the intricacies of your past connection, while simultaneously recognizing the complexities it introduced into your current dynamic. the studio, usually a place of creativity and collaboration, had transformed into a space laden with the weight of your shared history.

"it's okay," you responded, your words carrying a touch of reassurance. as your reply registered, a faint smile tugged at the corners of his lips – a detail you couldn't help but notice. after all, it was that very smile that had ignited four years of your life, a smile that held memories and emotions you had both shared.

"um, i'll just ask you a few questions, and then you're free to go," he stated, his voice carrying a hint of nervousness that didn't escape your notice. this new facet of his demeanor felt unfamiliar to you, a departure from the confident jaemin you had known.

you found yourself disliking this uneasiness, and a thought occurred to you – maybe it was time to rekindle something within him. as he began asking you questions, you decided to respond in a way that would evoke a certain familiarity between you two. it was a subtle attempt to bridge the gap, to draw out the person you once knew.

you had believed that his silence was what you wanted. you had convinced yourself that distancing yourself from him would protect you from the past mistakes. but now, facing the reality of the situation, you realized that perhaps a certain selfishness was ingrained within you. maybe, just maybe, you yearned to erase the distance, to defy your own rationalizations.

in this moment, you found yourself yearning to rekindle what had been lost, to bring back a connection that once meant so much. the conflicting emotions within you painted a complex picture of your desires – a battle between self-preservation and the longing for something more.

however, as you locked eyes with him and saw the lack of any discernible emotion in his gaze, a haunting wave of fear resurfaced within you. in that moment, it was as if time rewound, taking you back to the day of your graduation when your heart and spirit had felt shattered. the memory of that painful experience rushed back, accompanied by the doubts and uncertainties that had plagued you.

if you were to truly confront your own feelings, you'd admit that what you witnessed that night had left you questioning your own worth. the events had stirred up doubts about whether you had ever been deserving of taking risks for, whether you had ever been someone worth fighting for.

"hey, good morning, y/n."

"morning, director."

"how's today treating you?"

"pretty good, thanks."

"hmm, and what's life been like after college?"

"…"

"take your time."

"at first, i felt okay. my friends were all getting closer to their dreams, and i was genuinely happy for them. especially…"

"especially who?"

"especially the person i left behind."

"…"

"i was content being happy for someone else. then another year went by, and i wasn't feeling so great anymore."

"do you really think they're happy?"

"hmm?"

"the person you left behind."

"yeah. and my other friends seem happy too. they've got jobs they love, they're with people they care about, and i only had… renjun *laughs* … but sometimes, i can't help but feel like i'm the one who got left behind, you know? even though i was the one who walked away."

"let's talk about your person."

"oh *laughs* he's not my person."

pausing for a moment, you glanced at jaemin behind the camera. the question lingered in your mind: what was he trying to do? his actions and intentions remained a puzzle.

his expression grew serious, his gaze fixed intently on you. it was as if he had something to convey, something he was holding back.

"the last time i actually saw him was in an instagram post. he was with some girl. it happened on my graduation day. i waited the whole day, hoping he'd appear in the midst of the crowd. when he didn't, i held onto the possibility of seeing him by the gates. but that didn't happen either. my last hope was maybe he'd send me a single message, but by the end of the day, nothing came. then i went on instagram and saw a photo – a warning, i guess. a warning that i should just stop hoping. that… happened a few weeks later, i think. or maybe it was just a few days after our argument, the one where he told me he couldn't love… yeah."

you met his gaze and once again, his face was serious. his eyes were furrowed and his mouth was slightly open. a few moments passed, and he let out a shaky breath. screw it, you thought, it's out there now and i don't care anymore.

your silent exchange was interrupted as he shifted the camera away. confusion clouded your thoughts as you watched him move. he turned back to you, his expression still serious, and then he grabbed a chair from the nearby table. he sat down with his back facing you.

the room felt charged with unspoken emotions, leaving you to question his intentions and actions. it was as if he was peeling away layers, searching for something beneath the surface.

"did you know that…" he began, his voice breaking the silence. "she was his sister?"

"i never told you about her, that's on me," he admitted with a chuckle. "that was her last day, y/n. so i decided to spend the entire day with her. i'm sorry."

you were taken aback. "i'm sorry–"

"it's okay, y/n."

"i know i left you with so many questions that night, but let me tell you… every effort you made, every cookie you baked, i cherished all of it. i loved you. i'm sorry if my actions made you doubt yourself."

another pause filled the air.

"i left when you left."

"you were my dream. architecture wasn't really my passion, you know? i was struggling a lot, but luckily, you were there with me. i decided to chase after what i truly loved when you left, because i realized if i wanted you back in my life, it should be when i'm at my best, right? i wasn't lying when i said i couldn't love. i didn't want to love you when i was broken. i wanted to be the best version of myself for you. i thought that if i wanted you to be with the best person, then that should be me. so i became that person, a director, and then i planned all of this." his eyes finally met yours.

"i was always looking at you."

tears welled up in your eyes, and he seemed to notice. he took a step towards you and enveloped you in his arms.

"i'm sorry for not holding onto you back then, baby. but i promise, i won't let go of you now," he whispered.

"i'm sorry for leaving, jaemin," you sobbed.

"shh, you did what you thought was right."

"do you want to have lunch with me now?" he asked.

a mixture of emotions flooded your heart, and with a nod, you replied, "yes, jaemin."

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roxannepolice · 3 months

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Brain at 4pm: Loooook, I knooow you have that one scene you want to write but... I'm just... not in the mood? Thanks for the candles and music and all, but... naah.

Brain at 4am: I won't let you sleep until you write that down :3

- Give that poor hamster a break - the Master's voice was muffled by the pillow.

- Huh? - the Doctor turned towards the other Time Lord in confusion, only partially caused by a sudden halt to his thoughts.

- The hamster. In the rusty squeeky wheel you call a brain. I can't sleep with the noise.

- Right, as if you cared for some hamster - the Doctor quipped and, shoving his hands in his pockets, came closer to the bed.

- Cute, hungry and agressive... I do feel an affinity to them.

The Doctor snorted. And then, if only to keep other thoughts at bay, he asked a question that's been bothering him since the... cheesecake.

- I was just wondering, you know... What have you been up to between getting sucked through the gate and the Mondasian colony? It was a while, judging by the beard and hair...

- Are you saying I look old? - the Master turned towards him lazily. From where he stood the Doctor could see his amber eyes gleaming in the dark. - And anyway, you figured it out, didnt't you? The Time Lords cured my little condition and kicked me out, then I couldn't drive... I have to wonder, were you this polite with her?

- With who? - the Doctor dodged, clumsily.

- Oh, come on. The girl me. Missy - the Master wrinkled his nose. - Couldn't help the feeling you saw her as... distinct from me, the actual me. I got sucked to Gallifrey because I'm so incompetent and then she pops in with empathy that came from nowhere.

There was hurt just detectable under the Master's scorn, but what he said brought up one of those nasty pussy wounds the Doctor figured out he has to face, whether he likes it or not.

- Was hard to be polite with you after what you did to Bill.

- Ah, of course, because if only I wasn't there, you would have swooped in - once you finished your absolutely necessary show of brilliance - and got her out with only a cyber heart that had nothing to do with dragging her to an epic adventure she was absolutely not iffy about.

- Don't make this my fault - the Doctor's whisper was angrier than a shout could ever be.

- Not saying it was your fault - the Master made a show of how unmoved he was - just a consequence of your action. Or inaction. You know, by the time we got to my room you have already started scribbling on a blackboard. I imagine you could have already reached the lift by then.

- Can't imagine why with such an efficient mind you ended up ruining a perfectly functional colony - the Doctor spat back.

- Well, you met them, not exactly the brightest bunch in the universe - the Master shrugged back.

There was a moment of heavy silence in the darkness. The silence of clouds heavy with thunder.

- Why didn't you stay with me? - the Doctor finally broke it, a light rain deadlier than any noise.

- Oh, I don't know, because my experience with considering what happens when I'm dead is that saving someone's ass gets mocked at best?

- That's just petty.

- Never said I wasn't that. You were there when I executed Bill Gates over a Windows update.

- And apparently you heard some words I said.

The Master cursed quietly, angry at his blunder.

- Ok, I listened, as in registered what you said, but you speech was so incoherent I woulnd't say I heard anything. "Without witness, without reward" this, "you're going to die too, how will that be" that - no accent deserved the butchery the Master did to the Doctor's Scottish one. - So which one is it, without witness, or what about after you die? Seems a bit contradictory to demand no witnesses yet worry about after you die... You'll be dead, what's that to you?

- Much to anyone you might have helped.

- Sounds like a witness to me...

- This is strawman sophistry, you know full well what my point was.

- Urgh, professor, I don't believe I noted that down...

- Just... be kind. Don't turn back on other people. Save them if you can.

- As you did Adelaide Brooks?

This silence was more like the soft ringing after your head gets hit by a brick.

- How... what do you know of Adelaide Brooks? - the Doctor asked quietly, his voice choked. He made so sure to keep his thoughts away from the Bowie Rocket launch throughout the party. So sure, even the Master couldn't have...

- No, I haven't peeked in on your hamster. Didn't have to. That rocket's timeline was as clear on your whole being as waves on a radio. Wasn't hard to figure out the rest. So?... - the Master raised himself on the bed in a way reminiscent of a cat spotting a mouse drowning in a bowl of cream.

- I saved her - the Doctor whispered, without looking at the Master, instead hugging his own chest, his head lowered - and two other crew members. Couldn't save everyone, but I could save them. Her. They were... I saved them, too, but I was saving her... And then she... and then she...

- And then she reminded you laws of time aren't just fancy abstractions made up by Rassilon and Omega during an orgy, only constant flow of musts, musn'ts, wills, won'ts, wants and not wants. How about that.

There was another moment of silence, this one wet with unseen tears.

- That's your problem, Doctor. You believe you can see without being responsible. And, consequently, aren't responsible if you don't see. Responsibility can't see you if you can't see it. And when I tell you one must either rule or serve, becuase that's what responsibility is, you dismiss me as a villain in your fairy tale.

This moment of silence was soft and cold as a burrow in snow.

- Still such eloquence - the Doctor finally said. - But if you do know all this... why destroy?

- That's one easy way to really stop being responsible.

- Easier means more boring - the Doctor echoed the Master's earlier words.

- Guess sometimes - the Master started in silence warmer by bodies pressing against each other in the snow - sometimes boring isn't so ubearable. Don't tell anyone I said this.

The Doctor kept looking at the floor, still hugging his chest. That's not your fault, Donna's voice echoed in his mind. You can't save everyone, echoed his not-own.

Then there was rustle of bedsheets. The Doctor glanced at the Master over his shoulder. He pulled away the covers making a place for him in his bed.

- C'm here.

- What? - the Doctor asked with a disbelieving half-smile.

- Oh, come on, you clearly want to sleep, but don't want to sleep alone, and even you have enough dignity to not get between your evil stepmom and favourite niece, and even I have enough taste to not let you kicked puppy face interrupt the birthday girl getting the presents from her husband. So. Come here.

The Doctor snortled, but undressed to his underwear and got into the Master's bed. The other Time Lord promptly turned his back on him.

- No cuddling, though, you try to cuddle and I'll bite your arms off.

The Doctor snorted. Pity. As Donna called him out, he did like the Master in this body, and now, and even on the colony ship, there was a certain... softness to his form, which looked traitorously welcoming.

- Are you now saying I'm fat? - the Master hissed without turning back.

- No, not really - the Doctor laughed. - Just... I do like the look. And that's just the thing. You look like you lived quite some time between the gate and the black hole. That's why I asked.

The Master sighed.

- Well, not that I really immediately crashed because I couldn't drive, it was some good, veery good years in between, at least on my side of the experience. But no, not as long as it looks. Still back on Gallifrey, after I was stabilized and had the drums taken away... - the Master swallowed and the cuddling prohibition became even harder to obey - I finally had a moment to look at myself and. What the actual fuck, I looked like a 90s grunge band dropout!

- It was kinda cute - the Doctor laughed. - I liked it.

- You're not exactly known for your taste, dear Melanie will back me up on this if nothing else. But anyway, I figured out I can wait for my hair to grow out, or I can make a good use of some 5 minutes worth of Artron energy.

- You spent 5 minutes of your life to deal with a bad hair day? - the Doctor laughed again.

- A good deal to not have to avoid mirrors for a month! And no, the 5 minutes were for the full set with the beard.

- I like the beard, too.

- Couldn't help but notice.

- I always like you.

- Don't get soppy on my bed.

- You're beautiful.

At that the Master didn't find a flippant response in good timing. He chose to pretend he's already asleep instead. The Doctor took advantage to break the firm no culdding rule, slowly got closer against the other Time Lord's back and placed an arm around his waist. When the only retaliation was a an angry snore, he pressed his mouth to the Master's shoulderblade, too.

And if, after a surprisingly good sleep the Doctor woke up with his hand pressed close between the Master's hearts, well. What happens on birthday parties stays at birthday parties.

#do you ever wonder if you shouldn't just make your three long chapters fic into shorter chapters #but a nasty voice says nooo this is about DA STRUCTURE!#well anyway #doctor who #doctor who fanfiction #thoschei #doctor x master #best enemies #saxteen #old men tensimm #angst and fluff

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miscreantahead · 3 months

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Tbh I've seen a LOT of people saying they don't think Chester and Norris are Jon and Martin in any way but the way I see it the other possibilities just don't make sense with what we have. (Not talking to people who just don't want it to be them because I see your point there but... well anyway.) Possibilities I've considered are as follows, let me know if there's some other thing I didn't think of:

They're completely unrelated to Jon or Martin and Alex and Jonny are just using their voices for new "characters". The reason I don't believe this at all is simple: is because it feels cheap and like a bad storytelling decision, and that may be a matter of opinion but I've listened to enough Q&A's between the two of them to feel like they wouldn't go that route. I could absolutely accept this if they were on a constrained budget and short on VA's, but the kickstarter suggests otherwise. I'm not saying they couldn't have cameos were Jon and Martin not in this, but large cryptic parts after the ambiguity of what happens to these two at the end of TMA would be a tasteless bait and switch that I feel like I trust them not to do. I'm using my Reasonable Typing Voice but I honestly think this take is borderline impossible and it would blow me away if this was the case.

2 is under the cut.

2. Something else simply pulled their voices from all of the statements they read that the web collected and is imitating them while reading new material. This one is *possible* but still feels entirely unlikely but the why is more complicated so I'm going to break down why this doesn't add up to me:

• The cases are being read by something sentient enough to understand and apply strong emotional tone to the human "speech" in each case. The contrast of the introductions and headers/filing information makes this even more apparent which suggests it was a conscious decision (blatantly, IMO, and after an explanation was provided for all the statements sounding like the same writing style in TMA, I'd be extremely surprised if this had no bearing on the narrative and is just a choice of execution.). So there's no way this is just a computer program, even if it's influenced by beholding, we know from TMA that beholding doesn't have that kind of understanding of human emotion either. Something with a deeper understanding of language and humanity than a computer program could have is reading these. Unless they're actually taking us down a sentient AI route, but that seems unlikely. So it has to be something in some way human.

• We consider it could just be Freddy (I forget how it's actually spelled, FR3-DI?) using their voices and that Freddy is the individual in question with human level sentience, but I have no explanation for why it would use their voices separately, why it wouldn't include others who read statements like Melanie, Basira, Tim, Daisy, etc. Yes, there's still Augustus, but that can only cover one of the other characters who read statements, and only Jon and Martin read a significant enough amount of them to set themselves aside from the others who read. The ONLY thing that would make this theory work for me is if Augustus turned out to be Gertrude, and honestly I wouldn't put it past Alice, trans legend, to call a quite seemingly older woman's voice by a masculine sounding name just for the hell of it. But, again, seems unlikely.

• We could consider that they are to only some small degree themselves, but they've lost a significant enough portion that they aren't truly, and are simply extensions of this universe's "Eye" (saying eye because I think the motivation would still have to be voyeuristic to bother?), to the point where who they used to be won't even be a concern. But this one is still challenged by the first bullet to some degree, I think. This one is possible, albeit a little boring in my opinion.

I'm willing to accept that none of the characters we know and love will truly be present in this new narrative. I actually went into it with that expectation and was jump-scared by AJN's voice 10 minutes into the first episode. But with everything in episodes 1 and 2, I don't think it's far-fetched at all to hope we're going to get some jmart again (I think the other direction is more far-fetched). I do think it's perfectly likely it's going to be miserable and painful the whole fucking time, though.

#the magnus protocol #seeing a lot of posts saying they dont think it's them and it doesn't track for me so voila! a take!#again this isn't for anyone who just hates the idea of it being them that's sensible but im just saying i can't find a way that it's not

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teddypickerry · 1 year

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Could you write something angsty for Alex?

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐋 𝐔𝐍𝐈𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐄.

pairing! alex turner x fem reader

summary! in which alex’s lack of songs leads to him writing something he shouldn’t

word count! 1k

warnings! none

a/n! this fucking sucks. i don’t know why i hate this so much. one of my friends read it and loved it but i cannot get into it. BUT I LOVE ALEX SO I AM POSTING IT. probs cause it’s 4am and i’m tired (never). also i left the the ending kinda up to you. if you want him to apologize then you can imagine that or if you want her to dump his sorry ass then slay!

PARALLEL UNIVERSE. the exact words your boyfriend had jotted down on a notepad left in the sitting room. you'd got home from work, noticing a mess of things on the coffee table and chair where you could assume your boyfriend alex had sat all afternoon. he was currently in between tours and albums meaning, he was drawing inspiration from everything. for some reason he was in dire need of lyrics as if he didn't just release an album a year ago.

alex's process, that he'd explained to you the evening prior, consisted of needing lyrics by the end of the next year after the album. which made no sense to you but apparently to him it was all worked out in his brain. so he'd spent the past few months jotting down every word that interested him. sure it got frustrating, he left dinner with your sister the other day because he had a writing epiphany. only to have you come home two hours later to a rather pissed off version of him. him going on about messing up the beat and locking himself in his office for the rest of the evening.

alex was irritable and frustrated with his lack of inspiration and you honestly party blamed yourself. with his exes, he'd had several love songs that could have been mistaken for poems lined up. the thoughts of you possibly being at fault for this version of your boyfriend woke you up during the early hours of the morning. there was a part of you that worried you weren't enough for the romantic man. and your biggest fears seemed to shine the moment your eyes crossed over the notepad. the title scribbled 'parallel universe' in alex's sloppy handwriting. below were crossed out messy lines of writing. all hurting you more than the next.

'in some parallel universe, i know you

held me tighter. i tried harder. you spoke,

"look my love, i will look for you in every

lifetime." i didn't have you in this one so,

i'll have to wait for the next'

that was enough to have your heart beating out of your chest. there was more written at the bottom, but you couldn't bother. you'd felt betrayed. it didn't matter who it was about but he did at least owe you that. not that you ever wanted to hear it. hear who he was thinking about this way, dreaming about being in the arms of while actually in yours. the feeling was indescribable.

the hum of the tv was the only thing beside your heavy breaths that you'd heard. not acknowledging the sound of footsteps down the hallway into the living room, where you stood. your back towards him as he stopped in the doorway. "thought that was you. thought i heard the door. look- i think i finally have something figured out so maybe we can go out to that place you like in a bit. the one with the blue drink that you always get and have a proper night out. it's been awhile..." his warm voice trailed off at your silence, and lack of acknowledgment of him.

you let out a deep breath before turning your head, noticing the man with a white towel wrapped around his waist. his hair was dripping wet besides one strand over his eyes. he looked so fucking good, and that fucking hurt.

the expression on your face told him something not that it was correct in anyway. "we don't have to go there, i mean.." he licked his lips. "we could always stay here tonight, order in... stay in bed."

you didn't know why you let him ramble on. maybe because there was a part of you that hoped the paper in your hand was a lyric nick wrote, or maybe jamie, or probably matt... married matt. "alex?"

"hm?" he hummed uncomfortably as he stepped closer to you, securing the towel in the process. his eyes finally caught the prize. the notepad still in your hand visible for all to see. he could have sworn he shit himself. "y/n-"

"why-" you huffed as you stepped back from him. "i'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume this is miles' words, not yours." the silence on the other end answered your question as you felt something sharp in your soul. like you were being cut in half, your heart at least. "alex," you whined as pure pain took over. p

"angel," alex called out as you only shook your head. he tried to step closer once more as you backed up, now against the wall. he sighed and stepped back assuring his defeat. "it's just words. just some lyrics, i needed something to write so-"

"so you decided to declare your love for your ex? dream about her holding onto you?" you scoffed as his body stiffened and he turned his head slightly. "no-"

"then what the fuck is this then?" you held up the paper as your eyes began to sting. alex gulped at the sight of your pain. "angel, i had nothing okay? so i tapped into a place i haven't been in forever- years, haven't felt that in years. but i needed something dramatic and devotional."

"then write about your goddamn girlfriend! or make something up, what the hell, alex?" your voice threatened a yell as he sighed and attempted to step closer to you. "this is my job, baby. this is what i do for a living. i don't-"

"just," you started before biting your lip and crossing your arms. "i can't do this right now. i can't be with you right now," you mumbled as you grabbed your purse and jacket. all sat on the chair where you'd left them not even five minutes ago. alex's breathing got heavier as he watched you slip on your jacket. he tried to stop you. he tried to tell you that his words meant nothing. but maybe you'd listen, maybe in a parallel universe.

#teddypickerry #alex turner x reader #alex turner #arctic monkeys fic #alex turner fic #angst

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carionto · 4 months

Text

"So Basically... You Work For Cthulhu?"

Part 1 2 3 4 5 6

Trisha was the first to break the strange silence after Iorvan had finished explaining in the most vague terms possible what his purpose here was.

"That is a very crude and inaccurate oversimplification, but yes." with a hint of irritation in his voice, he agreed to her assessment. "The High Priest is all knowing on matters that matter, yet every now and then a "nothing", as beings of such magnitude view mortals like us, will happen upon the right combination of irrelevant information to form new true knowledge."

"Like the million monkey typewriters writing Shakespeare!" Trisha energetically interjected. "So why not just scry or whatever they do every brain and pluck out all the good info?" she questioned.

"As I said, we are "nothings" to them, and though their capabilities are beyond our understanding, they are not without limits, and observing billions of human minds is just incomprehensible static, I imagine." Iorvan looked directly at Trisha, "How much effort would you say it would take to comprehend your thoughts alone, Trisha?"

"Good point, I don't bother doing that half the time myself." she replied eagerly without a second thought.

Chief Engineer Tameki, very clearly confused, finally gathered herself enough, "Wait, please. So why are you here? What does any of that even mean?"

"C'mon ira, keep up, it's not that complicated." Trisha seemed to be more surprised by everyone else's apparent confusion than everyone else was by how she wasn't.

"Us going through a tear in space-time made the universe glitch out. You know, the quantum entanglement thing breaking when it shouldn't and some mumbo-jumbo about our spiritual selves being in two places at once or something. Oh yeah, souls are a thing, but only sorta? Did I get that right, Prof? To Cthulhu it looked like we duplicated our ethereal form and that should not be a thing that anyone can do, so they took notice and sent you here to investigate."

"In the simplest and most inaccurate terms, but correct." Iorvan, now more composed after accepting that Trisha's brain functioned imperfectly enough to somehow comprehend his altered understanding of the true nature of the world. Well, changed by as much knowledge as the High Priest deemed essential to impart onto him.

He continued, adjusting his own explanation to match the intellectual level of the subjects. "Such an unprecedented occurrence will not go unnoticed by the rest of the Old Ones, and the consequences for this event originating directly from the High Priest's physical domain are unpredictable, hence the unprecedented intervention you see before you in my form."

He continued, "In the simplest acceptable terms possible - the actions you took to arrive here must be reversed. I was granted all relevant knowledge about the hybrid warp engine, however, the local domain here is inaccessible and information must be retrieved manually. What is the status of it and all related matters?" Iorvan addressed the question with an icy stare towards everyone on the bridge.

Ira, with a slight look of worry, answered: "It didn't come with us when we warped. Because of the instantaneous nature of the transportation, it couldn't send any data about itself during or after the warp."

At this, the unofficial head IT guy, Valencio, chimed in, "Well, it's not impossible that whatever energy discharge that did happen couldn't have sent some signal to the nearest connected devices. The warp cut every quantum connection, but some of them were connected with a hardline, right?"

"That is true, the Dusk was printed at a military shipyard," Haespar Kraus, having found something sensible to cling to, was finally able to feel useful. "Short range redundancies like that are always integrated, even with unconventional designs like the hybrid warp engine. We'll just need to retrieve them and look at their final logs-"

"D O S O !"

The bridge, which had begun to regain a bit of life, was stunned silent by Iorvan suddenly echoing this command in a voice that came not just from his mouth, but also the walls, the floor, ceiling, and even right behind everyone's heads.

While Trisha, once again, composed herself first, even she was unnerved by the ominous aura Iorvan was exuding.

"A-alright, Prof. No need to be all evil occult on us. You're human too, or were at least. You know pressure like that isn't the most productive, yeah? So, like, chill. Please?"

His dagger-like stare towards her did not diminish, but his presence on the bridge did become less intense.

"Find the answer. Deliver it to me in one year. My own visit to this foreign domain will not go unnoticed, but the High Priest accepted this price. The knowledge you obtain, however, MUST be worthwhile. It is, after all, a trivial matter for any Old One to simply erase all "nothings" that have made themselves known in a... negative light."

With those final words, the form of Professor Iorvan evaporated into a mist.

"Back to 27..." came Emily's voice after a moment of sobering silence.

"So, uhh..." Trisha felt the need to fill the air with something productive, "basically, if we don't figure out what exactly happens during a warp, everyone back home is gonna die. Umm... let's go get those data thingies?" with uncertainty, she looked at everyone on the bridge.

Haespar, wanting to keep his image of the sensible cool headed one, picked up the baton Trisha had almost dropped, "Yes, well, that is something we were going to do eventually anyway, it's just been bumped up the list. Ira, Valencio - will you need anything not currently here for a full warp simulation once we get whatever may exist in those terminals?" he regained his actual composure as he faked the first few sentences, and was now in his serious mode.

"There's not enough computing power hooked together with the quantum computers being all blank, and we'll need either one fully powered reactor running on overload for half a day, or get a second one back up." Valencio counted each though on his fingers, an old habit.

"Good. Emily will head that, everyone else will have to postpone your previous tasks." Haespar declared. "Ira? Ira!" Haespar approached her with worry. "With Knoslark being a grumpy baby, and Sergeant Zhao still in a coma, by rank, you're the de-facto leader. It's a lot to take in, but what are we going to do. Cthulhu is real. Magic is real. Souls are real. New information, sure. World upending even, but that doesn't change what reality is right now for us. So, please, don't break down on me. It's just one thing at a time, just like any other problem we've dealt with before."

Ira Tameki took a deep breath. Then another. After a moment, she looked over everyone on the bridge.

"Right, you heard Haespar, but I have one correction - I'll be heading the reactor repair and re-ignition. Emily, you take everyone you need and retrieve those terminals and any other digital and electronic devices close to where the warp engine was, even damaged ones. Extract everything.

Valencio, start working on the simulation code, you'll have all the computing and raw power needed, I'll make sure of that." she saw the uncertainty and nervousness on some of the junior crew members' faces.

"It's going to be a long year, but we already did the impossible once - we broke physics and traveled thirteen billion light years in zero zeptoseconds. Let's figure out how and get ourselves back home."

#humans are space orcs #humans are space australians #humans are space oddities #humanity fuck yeah #carionto #humans are deathworlders #story #scifi #cthulhu

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asena-graywolf · 7 months

Text

Happy Family Life

You united your lives with Aone 3 years ago. You were each other's only love both in high school and university. Naturally, you decided to crown your relationship with marriage. You got married in a simple and fun ceremony. The side-by-side photo of you at your wedding was still hanging on your bedroom wall. Every morning when you woke up, you woke up to a happy day by looking at that photo.

You posed in an elegant wedding dress, hugging your husband. This was a document of your love. You intend to wake up looking at that picture every morning for the rest of your life.

Because you wanted to live in touch with nature after marriage, you bought a country house in an area away from city life, crowds and noise. Everywhere was covered with trees and grass. You had a cute two-storey house, just like in fairy tales. Moreover, the garden was so fascinating that it resembled your dreams.

Aone would get up before you in the morning. You would get up right after him and prepare breakfast together. Your husband would take great pleasure in making you breakfast. That day, you woke up to such a peaceful morning. As soon as you woke up, your eyes searched for Aone, you thought you would find him in the kitchen preparing breakfast for you as usual. You put on your dressing gown, went down the stairs and went to the kitchen. But strangely, you saw that Aone was not there. You called out to him, thinking he might be inside the house.

“Aone?!” When there was no response from Aone, you tried once again.

“Aone? Where are you?''

Apparently he wasn't at home. He was either in the garden or busy with flowers in the greenhouse. You left the kitchen and went into the hall, then you went out to the living room and through the door of the living room that opened to the glass greenhouse. You found it exactly where you thought it would be. Aone was wearing his gardener's clothes and was working on flowers. You saw him refilling the pots

“Good morning” you said smiling to your husband.

He answered you without looking up

"Good morning. I'm sorry, I couldn't prepare breakfast for you." ''It's not important. "Is there something wrong?" you wondered.

"Unfortunately, the three naughty kittens I once rescued from the street are now big enough to enter the greenhouse and knock over the flower pots."

You responded with a giggle.

"Oh my God! I don't believe. "How did they get into the greenhouse?"

"I forgot to close the door when I left here last night. "The door was left ajar, so they entered and broke everything."

''Look at the naughty kitties! They'll make trouble for my husband! "Now they will see their day" you said jokingly

Aone was focused on what he was doing and had to ignore your joke. You cleared your throat

“Okay…then let me prepare something for you. "You'll need energy to refill the broken pots."

Aone replied as he grabbed handfuls of soil

"Don't bother. I'll eat later. You have your breakfast, then feed those three naughty cats. "If I finish work, we can garden together."

You patted Aone on the back

"I'll take care of the garden. After saying "Do your job in peace", you gave him a kiss for luck. While kissing your cheek, you felt his smooth skin on your lips.

You left your husband alone with his work and returned to the kitchen. The three kittens Aone rescued from the street have now turned into beautiful adult cats. You called your cats, as soon as they heard you they came to the kitchen and started rubbing on your legs.

"You naughty bastards! So, you broke into the greenhouse last night and knocked over the flower pots. "Lucky for your cuteness, otherwise you would be deprived of a delicious breakfast this morning."

You put food in your cats' food bowls. Then you washed your hands and set about making sandwiches for yourself and Aone at the counter. Next to it, you would squeeze the juice from the oranges you picked from the orange tree in your garden.

Aone loved orange juice. Tomatoes, ham and cheddar cheese were indispensable for him in the sandwich. You've prepared a sandwich just like Aone likes it. You filled the oranges with juice and took them to the greenhouse.

“Aone? I made your favorite sandwich. Come on, eat something. "Then you can keep on your work."

''Y/n. "Didn't I tell you I would eat later?" he said to you in a calm tone.

"You said you know, but I couldn't stand you working on an empty stomach."

Aone sighed. He took off his gloves and took the tray from your hands.

"Bon apetit to you.I will finish my breakfast soon and go out to the yard."

Aone called after you as you exited the greenhouse.

"Leave Kame in the yard. Let him wander around a bit. "We'll put him back in its nest in the evening."

''Ok. "I'll handle it," you said as you walked in.

You went back to the kitchen and had your breakfast. It looks like your cats had also had their fill and were asking you to play. You took them out into the garden. At least they would play by themselves and not bother you

"Cuties" you muttered while looking after them

As soon as you finished your work in the kitchen, you went back to your bedroom and changed your clothes. Since you will be working in the garden, you chose comfortable and loose-fitting clothes. You didn't forget to wear your gardening overalls. Before going to the garden, you took your pet turtle, Kame, out of his nest.

"Good morning Kame! "Come on" you said and took it between your palms.

"Shall we go out to the garden together? What do you say?''

You gently caressed the turtle's shell and then went out into the garden. You put the turtle down and then started to do your work.

But before that, you had another job. You walked into the backyard and stopped in front of the rabbit cage. You had four rabbits: brown, white, black and black spotted. You made an area for them in the backyard. You would take them out of their cages every morning, feed them, and let them wander around the backyard until evening.

You and your pets were like a big family. You took care of each of them as if they were your own children. You and your husband were both a very animal-loving couple. You had a very happy and joyful life. Your only wish throughout your life was to live in this house and in this environment with your family until you die.

"Good morning, my babies!" you greeted your rabbits with a smile. You took them out of their cages and released them into the garden Aone had left lettuce and carrots in the cages for the rabbits. You put them where your rabbits can eat them. You won't die or leave having left something and you could get your work done in the front yard

You returned to the front garden and looked at the strawberry seedlings you planted in your tiny field. Strawberries were starting to ripen, and since it was summer, they were ripening fast.

You went to the nearby tank, took the watering jug and filled it with water from the pump. Then you started watering your strawberry seedlings. You cut the weeds that had started to grow around them. Now your seedlings looked healthier than before. The strawberries of one of them looked ripe. It was big and red. You immediately plucked it and popped it into your mouth.

The taste of organic strawberries created a flavor explosion in your mouth. I wish there was more for you and Aone to eat You've finished watering and pruning your strawberry seedlings. You did not need to spray them because they were not infested. Next was to prune the apple, lemon and orange trees. Since the fruits of the trees were ripe, they had to be collected.

You used to pick fruit from the tree with Aone. Aone would hold a basket in his hand, lift you onto his shoulders, and give you access to the tree. This way, you could reach the fruits more easily, and Aone would fill the fruits you collected into the basket.

You would either sell the fruits or make products such as pickles and jam from them.

You entered the greenhouse to look for the fruit basket. While you were in the greenhouse, you wanted to tell Aone that you had to take care of this now. But it looks like Aone wasn't done yet

"Dear, we need to pick the fruits. Can you help me?''

Aone stopped putting soil in the pot

"If your work is not done, I can handle it alone."

He answered you while taking off his gloves

"How will you handle it alone? You know we have to wait a while to get a new staircase."

You fluttered your eyelashes

"But you're not done yet"

"Come on," he said, going out of the door and into the garden.

You followed your husband. When you arrived under the fruit trees, Aone lifted you onto his shoulders and you picked the fruits one by one, starting from the lemon tree first.

When your basket was full, you got off your husband's back

''Babe?''

"Hm?"

"Gardening is a lot of fun, but…doing that with you is more enjoyable."

Aone wasn't used to this kind of compliment. Until he met you, no one had made him feel this valuable. During his high school years, no one would sit next to him when he got on the train. You were the first person to sit next to him. Aone didn't tell you, but he was so happy when he finally realized he wouldn't be traveling alone. He was so happy that he almost cried Aone bowed his head at what you said. Naturally, you were worried because he wasn't responding.

''Dear? What happened? "Did I say something wrong?" you touched his arm curiously.

He turned to you and put his arm around your shoulder.

''No. "You didn't say anything wrong," he replied.

"Then why did you remain so unresponsive?"

It seems like Aone had feelings to express to you. She put the basket on the ground. She sat on the grass. He made you sit in front of him.

''Do you know? "When you suddenly said that, my high school years came to mind."

You giggled

"We were two young lovers then. "It was beautiful, wasn't it?"

Aone nodded.

"No one has ever valued me this much. Besides you. Admittedly, I had social phobia at that time. Because of the serious expression on my face, people were afraid of me in the places I entered. I would travel alone, even on the train. I hated it when people looked at me like they saw a ghost."

You placed your palm on Aone's cheek

"I wish they could see the goodness and kindness in you. "You may have a tough exterior, but your heart is hot as fire." He held your hand on his cheek with his big palm and gently caressed your fingers.

"I didn't tell you, but the day you sat next to me on the train, I couldn't hold back my tears of happiness. Could such a terribly tyrant-looking man cry? Of course he would cry. The day you agreed to be my girlfriend was the biggest turning point in my life. Even if my happiness that day killed me, I was okay with it. Because I was with you, y/n.”

Aone's words were enough to move you. You tried not to show that your eyes were filled with tears.

“Aone…you are truly a man with a heart of gold. I'm so lucky to have you as my husband. "You are the person I love most in this life."

With his thick fingers, he gently cupped your chin and locked his eyes with yours.

Even though he had a serious and stern expression on his face from years ago, you saw the kind and good-hearted man behind that look.

"I've never talked to anyone for this long. For the first time, I started chatting with you using long sentences. "You know, when I spoke, my teammates were surprised by it."

You held each other's hands tightly and looked at each other deeply.

"It's okay if you don't talk to them. "All I care about is you."

He smiled slightly at you. Only you understood that he wanted to laugh sincerely, even if it was forced.

You both stood up.

''Come on! "There's still a lot of work to be done," you said, and you and your husband set about your daily work.

Your days have always been like this. You were busy gardening and feeding your animals from morning to evening. Sometimes you would go on nature trips with Aone. You were trying to go fishing at a nearby lake

So the months passed.

One day, while you were getting dressed in the bedroom, Aone texted you. You took your phone and read the message

Come to the backyard

You were afraid that something bad had happened to your rabbits and you went down the stairs at full speed in panic.

You went straight to the backyard and saw Aone looking at your rabbits from behind the cage

“Aone? Did something happen to the rabbits?"

Aone gestured for you to come with his hand. You walked next to him and watched the rabbits from behind the cage.

A soft feeling filled you when you saw the view. One of your rabbits had babies. And there were exactly 6 of them.

"Oh my God! I cant believe. How did we not notice? Six cute baby rabbits. Our family is expanding," you said happily.

“I wanted you to see this too,” Aone said to you in a soft voice.

You had something else on your mind. Good news you should tell Aone

"Um…Aone" you said and couldn't hide your blush.

Aone looked at your face as if he wanted to hear something from you.

''I have something to tell you''

''Yes?''

Aone suddenly became serious. He was suspicious that you were going to give him bad news.

"I think…we will have a baby in 7 months too"

The serious and cold look on your husband's face was replaced by a sweet and surprised smile.

“Y/n? Is this…is this really true?”

''Yes. I was going to tell you today. I found it more appropriate to say it as soon as I saw the baby rabbits."

Aone's big hands found your belly that hadn't grown yet and caressed it.

"I will teach our baby to love nature. Because he is the child of a dryad. Yes y/n. You are my dryad"

You embraced each other with love and from that day on you started counting the days for your baby.

------------------------------------------------------------

Did you remember my ''Kittens'' scenario? Aone was rescued three fluffy kittens from street. These cats, the same cats. They're just grew up. Aone has really golden heart man. I love him so much

#haikyuu x imagines #haikyuu!!#hq x y/n #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu scenarios #aone takanobu x you #aone takanobu imagine #aone takanobu #aone takanobu x reader #aone takanobu scenario #aone takanobu x y/n #haikyuu aone #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x y/n #x reader #female reader #fem reader

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ex-textura · 2 days

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Hi hello! Any fun facts you would like to share about your characters? (⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)

Eli~!

[i'm sorry this has taken me so long i've been picking away at this since you sent it 😶 apologies for the verbosity, but you got me started and i couldn't stop lmao]

I have SO MANY facts I want to share about my characters 👀 are they fun? ehhhhh. They sure are facts.

The big scar on Auric's face is from his sister's ex. He was jealous and abusive and the one time he flew into a rage in Auric's presence, he stepped in and took the hits so she could run. He almost died then. When he woke up his head was in her lap, he was surrounded by blood, and the abusive ex was dead.

He and Gale settled down after the events of the game, got married, and opened a tavern outside of Waterdeep with his sister and her love, Halsin. They have a teleportation circle in the basement connected to Gale's tower and they basically treat it like a guest house. They've also set up a place for Astarion in the basement so he can stay there whenever he's handy. He still doesn't really like Astarion, but his sister pleaded and he couldn't say no.

Ciaran collected every poetry book, love letter, and diary he could find once he started to get feelings for Gale. He also bothered everyone in the party constantly(Gale included) about what love is, how do you know that's what you're feeling, what do you do about it? He had no frame of reference for love so the whole thing was completely foreign to him. He was like an alien trying to learn human customs. He thought he was being sneaky.

Now that he's no longer trying to die all the time, he's taken up painting and gotten pretty damn good at it, too.

Jinx is 43 years old. Technically.

His skin used to be more red, but a wild magic surge turned him blue and the colour never totally faded.

He's demisexual

Fully incapable of picking up when he's being flirted with. He doesn't think he's handsome, or ugly. He's just Jinx.

He'll try literally anything once, so he let Astarion bite him, and then let him drain him because he'd never been bitten by a vampire before, and never died before. He turned him down for sex though because "I've already had gay sex before :) thanks though!" Astarion is still reeling from that one.

Amaris is one half of a splintered soul. They grew up with their other half as their best friend and had no idea.

The illithid abduction went funky and rather than just scooping them up into the nautiloid, it shunted them into an entirely different, mirrored reality. It wasn't until before the push on moonrise that they learned the truth.

Their best friend and other half had a massive crush on the infamous Gale of Waterdeep that they used to give her hell about all the time. Until they met him, and fell for him too.

Luckily, due to alternate universe fuckery, they each got a Gale and everyone is happy.

Naught is something of an urban legend to people who travel the roads outside Baldur's Gate. He hunted highwaymen with the help of his birds Quothe and Madge. Known only as The Raven on account of the only warning of their presence being a ruffle of feathers and the cry of ravens before the arrows would start flying.

He took payment for his heroism in money, food, or sex. Whatever was on offer.

Before they hit Baldur's Gate and rented out the Elfsong they hadn't slept in a bed in over 10 years.

Their boyfriend was teaching him to read before the fire that killed him and sent Naught on the run. As such, the lad still can't fucking read.

Apparently their type is nerds who are older than him.

Jack married his ex-wife when he was 18.

Has two kids - a son and a daughter - and a grandchild on the way.

His job in the city was general labour. Lifting, fixing, building, cleaning. Anything that paid.

His ex-wife, and therefore his kids, are dwarves. He's 6'5. There's a bit of a height difference there.

He plays the drums.

Ilztaufein is a name he gave himself after escaping the fall of Ched Nasad.

He'd only been training as a wizard for about 10 years when he left. Still though, he thinks he's hot shit and won't hear otherwise.

The only wizard he thinks is better than himself is Gale. Elminster is a nobody in his eyes.

He's 5'4!

For all his big talk he's kind of terrified of women and will automatically obey any order given to him by any of the women in the party. Except for Shadowheart..who he killed......And Mystra... who he's got plans for.

He's been researching the gods after hearing Mystra's order for Gale's sacrifice. He wants to usurp her.

Most of his work on the surface has been in and around Waterdeep, and he's been to Blackstaff Academy a number of times in that time, in disguise, trading information.

He doesn't understand how humans age.

He's never seen a cat in person until they entered Last Light. He's obsessed with them (they're regal, vicious, fancy little bitches. Just like him). The first time he sees one with fur he's going to lose his damn mind.

He's never been with a human before. It's only been drow and the occasional surface elf. Gale's body hair is magical to him and he's not at all subtle about it.

He's 6'2.

Muse more or less adopted Flair - his partner in crime - when they were still teenagers. He saw this homeless kid trying to flirt with him after one of his shows and, like one might with a pet, decided this one was his and took her in. He taught her everything he knew about flirting, manipulation, and getting away with it.

Astarion clocked them both as thieves right away when they met Gale and immediately started trying to use thieves cant to communicate to each other that he was the perfect mark, and whose turn it was to do the flirting.

They caught on that Astarion was on to them later, so Muse was tasked with distracting him, lest Astarion rat them out or, worse, take their mark out from under their noses.

Absolutely devastated when Astarion started using the same tactics on him that he'd used on his targets and that shit actually worked.

He's really bad at the whole...feeling your real genuine emotions...thing. He's been writing songs about Astarion trying to sort out his feelings, rather than..yknow. talking to anyone. at all. ever.

He got really mad at Flair when she started giving Gale expensive items so he wouldn't explode. He voted to send the wizard to the underdark cause he wasn't worth the trouble.

He smells like patchouli and vanilla.

#i'm sorry i got so wordy?#especially at the end?#these aren't fun facts anymore i'm just infodumping #asks #my ocs #oc: auric #ciaran finch #oc: amaris #oc: jinx #oc: naught #oc: jack torada #oc: ilztaufein #oc: muse #oh god i have so many #thank you for the ask I had so much fun rambling!!

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lord-squiggletits · 7 months

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My favorite petty headcanon as to why Pharma got treated Like That in canon is because no one ever liked him so that's why all the other Autobots instantly jumped to "oh well he just went insane and became evil for no reason we don't even care enough to go collect his body and confirm his death" bc they couldn't be bothered to dispense Autobot forgiveness to him.

I mean they forgave Drift aka war crimes and organic genocide McGee and no one had a problem having him become an Autobot and hang out on the ship. Which is especially egregious since Ratchet is also friends/has feelings for Drift and apparently had no problems forgiving him for what he did, but couldn't bother extending that kind of understanding/forgiveness to Pharma who he actually spent ~4-5 million years being friends with.

Again this is just a petty headcanon and not serious (there are better in-universe and meta justifications for why people treated Pharma like that) I'm just making Pharma my purse chihuahua and talking about how everyone did my poor baby wrong.

#squiggposting #pharma apologism #actually when you think about it the entire alleged found family of the lost light is basically just a small clique #of the overall population of the entire ship #but anyways. they really did do pharma dirty bc they just hated him / no one cared enough to vouch for him #and the one guy who did care told pharma he was dead to him and basically was the one who put pharma in death's way #fucking ratchet what a piece of shit friend. if my lifelong friend did that to me i would also go insane #pharma be like 'here's how the leader of the DJD blackmailed me into giving him tcogs or else would kill everyone'#ratchet: 'WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU HARVESTED ORGANS FOR THE DJD'#like yeah easy for him to be self righteous when he wasn't facing that choice of kill or die by the most notorious murderers of their speci

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wordsinhaled · 8 months

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so i was thinking more about the crowley/aziraphale pacific rim AU and i couldn't figure a way to stick them right in the middle of the action but i think that's okay because one of the best things about crowley and aziraphale is their "just some person"-ness anyway

i ended up with "if they just had a meetcute in the pacific rim universe what would that be like?" which. is not quite what i was imagining initially. but nevertheless? now this exists in my brain so y'all can be privy to this exceedingly handwavey scifi fluff

like, i don’t think aziraphale would ever step foot in a jaeger (can you imagine? i can't). but i think he could, in this AU, still own a bookshop, and have somewhat of a committed interest in cryptozoology. such that a.z. fell & co becomes sort of regionally renowned for its extensive cryptozoology section even before the kaiju wars. at first it's like a cult landmark but once the attacks begin it becomes something of a hotspot for information (much to aziraphale's dismay, because he still hates selling books)

crowley... i’m thinking. maybe he starts out in school studying astronomy. he's stoked about earthlike exoplanets. he gets to studying the conditions that permit life on earth, which leads him down the separate avenue of horticulture. he gets a rad little greenhouse going; propagating plants and all that.

(i don't know why plant nerd!crowley is just an natural arrow right to kaiju nerd!crowley to me but… something about it just makes sense in my brain. i mean, you know if humanity ever went off into space, crowley'd be the one responsible for preserving the seed library. but i digress.) the kaiju wars start, and crowley has a lightbulb moment, like, ohhh. they’re… fascinating? massive bloody efficient death machines, sure, but they’re cool, in the same way that carnivorous pitcher plants are cool. he's like, what questions can i ask about them??? answer: ask all the questions. and this leads him to aziraphale’s bookshop, of course

aziraphale’s got a sign up at this point, pointing out the cryptozoology section. he has a ton of people coming in asking about the topic, so he figured he’d make it easier for them to find, and subsequently be bothered less.

but no one else is as much of a regular. aziraphale learns, after the first few times he comes in, that his name is crowley—anthony crowley. it's because he asks if aziraphale can order increasingly specific books in, and he writes his name and phone number on a catalogue card so that he can call him when the books come in (...and if it's a ploy to give aziraphale his info… who's going to know?). aziraphale, for his part, wonders why crowley doesn't just use his university library, because anthony crowley is a graduate student. he's tall and rakish and bespectacled, with fiery hair and a serpent tattoo coiled around his wrist (aziraphale has no idea how far it goes after it disappears up his jacket sleeve, but the head of the serpent peeks out of his shirt collar sometimes, so aziraphale assumes it goes across his shoulder). he saunters about like he hasn't got a solid bone in his body. he has, apparently, a near-encyclopedic knowledge of the cosmos (which aziraphale is impressed by though he tries to be prim and reserved about it). occasionally, aziraphale hears crowley humming "flash" or "seven seas of rhye" from across the shop, and smiles to himself.

aziraphale doesn't know if crowley falls outside of his usual type, or if he's simply never come across anyone quite like him before, but he's finding himself becoming oddly attached. he tells his friend muriel about it over tea. "aziraphale," they tell him, "i think from what i've heard you're experiencing what they call a crush." (air quotes included.) "don't be ridiculous," aziraphale says. "i don't get crushes." (it's true, he's never had what one might traditionally call a crush. but so what? maybe he has one now)

crowley camps out in the stacks and writes notebooks full of spidery notes. once, he stays until past closing time, accidentally, and the next day he brings aziraphale a cup of english breakfast from the coffeeshop nearby, and a little pot of african violets as an apology. with a slightly sheepish grin, he says he grew the flowers himself. there's a little care card stuck into the soil, with more of his handwriting on it.

the violets bloom beautifully on the windowsill next to aziraphale's desk.

fast forward some indeterminate amount of time and now they actually spend time together.

maybe a kaiju came up the thames (i mean... listen. it could happen! if only just because it would be logistically fucking unhinged and the imagery of a kaiju rearing up out of the river while people are sitting on the london eye in the background is kind of great.) anyway, aziraphale had to impromptu barricade his bookshop and crowley was there too so they’re just. shut up in there with a handful of other customers until it’s safe to come out again. someone’s watching the live news coverage on their phone. crowley and aziraphale are sitting on the floor together between bookcases. a bit apart from everyone else, and passing crowley’s little flask of whisky back and forth. for fortitude, or whatever (fortitude against the kaiju threat, and not because they’re sitting next to someone they’re pining for, of course)

“y’ever thought about joining up?” crowley asks him eventually. aziraphale gives him a blank look. “you know.” there’s a metallic crash outside as if to prove crowley’s point. “the defense corps.”

“oh, heavens no. me, in a jaeger?”

“yeah—i suppose—nah, couldn’t see you doing it, now i think of it.”

“most certainly not.” the mouth of the flask is warm from crowley’s lips or maybe aziraphale’s imagining it. in any case he passes it back quickly. “you?”

“well… i’ve thought of it, sure. ‘course, it’d be k-science for me.”

“naturally.”

“oi! i could pilot a jaeger. if i wanted.” a pause. “what!”

“it’s only… well, it’d be a bit too slinky, wouldn’t it, with you piloting.”

“slinky!” mock indignation, giving way to curiosity, and circling back around to delight. “mister fell! have you been looking at my h—”

aziraphale steamrolls over the end of that sentence loudly. “it takes two, anyway, darling, as you well know. who would be your co-pilot?”

he resolutely doesn't contemplate crowley drifting with someone who isn't him. in this hypothetical scenario, which is never going to actually happen—

“you. obviously.”

(was it obvious?)

“but i would never—”

“yes, yeah, sure, mm-hmm. we’ve established that, aziraphale. i just figured we'd probably be... y'know. right?" they stare at each other for a moment before crowley barrels on. "anyway. just being silly, me. doesn't matter."

and why does crowley sound so tetchy and maudlin all of a sudden?

(narrator voice: crowley sounded tetchy because he had just been about to confess his feelings to aziraphale in the most roundabout way possible.)

anyway

maybe after this event crowley doesn't show his face in the bookshop again. aziraphale tries calling his number but his line's been disconnected. tries his level best not to pine for him and the next he hears of him is like, five years later when he's reading the newspaper one morning and sees an article on the oceanic monitoring operations going on in the pitcairn islands, and there's a photo of crowley grinning, dressed in a black turtleneck with the k-science logo on the chest, and he's quoted in the article, saying something about how he'd never have joined k-science if it hadn't been for a conversation he'd had with someone very important to him in a bookshop thousands of miles away what feels like a lifetime ago...

so aziraphale (madlad that he is, in any universe) is all, THIS. IS A SIGN and books himself a flight that very day

okay, and imagine their faces when aziraphale shows up on premises and crowley is all WHAT'RE YOU DOING HERE (basically—picture his disbelieving grin, the one he wears every time aziraphale surprises him) and aziraphale is all "well, i saw you in the morning paper, didn't i?" and he's, staring at crowley, who's got his sleeves rolled up and gloves on and he's up to his forearms in radioactive-looking bioluminescent goo, and he's all "hang on, let me get these gloves off, this stuff'll eat straight through your clothes and i remember how much you love that waistcoat—" "you remember?" "...'course i remember."

*insert soppy looks here*

anyway, then they go on a dinner date, sushi and chilled sake, and crowley rambles on at aziraphale about kaiju gut microbiomes and how they harness radioactive phytoplankton to power their digestive system through nuclear fission (or whatever), and aziraphale tries very hard to focus more on his food than on crowley's wildly gesticulating hands

i could go on but essentially it's just... pining and fluff. fluff and pining. and enormous sea monsters from another dimension of course

#good omens #ineffable husbands #ineffable pacific rim AU

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riewritten · 9 months

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OK apparently i was tagged in a very cool game (thank u @danchou-danchou !) wherein i choose my top 5 favorites among the stories i had published so far

DUSK IN THE BRIGHTEST

set in modern era wherein reader (aka you) has constant nightmares of the canon AOT verse. you thought it was none but very disturbing reccurent dreams until you came across erwin smith, the new professor and the only face you could recognize in that world. since his appearance, the nightmates had worsened! i was so enthralled with the concept of multiverse and thought that if that's the case, then might as well use it to give erwin the comfort & ending he deserves! in this fanfic, the source of all living matter (aka tree) had another power in store aside from the titan.

THE WORST KIND OF NOTHING

ah, the character study fic. you see,

hngngng. yes. YES. YESSSSSS. i love me an insane antihero. PLEASE. i want to publish the next chapters so BAD.

STUCK

don't you think literature, or any fictional world for that matter, is none but another real world that exists alongside our universe? books and TV & comic series could be windows that show glimpses of the universes around us :'D in this fic, you get stucked in sum world, erwin interrogated you about your circumstance, and as if it couldn't get worse, you eventually find a satirical comic series about your life 🤪

oh god, i love my characters consciously hating me to death for all the shit i've put them through. lmao.

MERE DROPLETS OF WATER CAN STILL MAKE A GLASS FULL

the generic plot of forbidden love trope where characters r bothered to love each other bc of their age. this one's a bit too realistic, tho 😔 AND IT'S ALL BECAUSE OF THIS GOOFY AHH CRUSH I HAD WITH THE MOST CHARISMATIC PROFESSOR I'VE EVER MET IN MY LIFE

WEEKEND LESSONS

booksmart erwin x lovely reader who loves hearing him out & letting him cook!! i've written this for @frenchdyer, a lovely being i can relate to A LOT. that's why it goes with my top favorites, too :)

making this is so much fun, so i think i want to revise the game a lil bit and hear about: @rinamars top 5 favorite plots she came up with (because you have 2 published fics so far, please tell me about the WIPs/silly lil stories inside your head >___<) ANDDDD @frenchdyer top 5 favorite artworks they had made so far!!

to anyone reading this, i want to hear your top 5, too, so i'm automatically tagging you 😝 mention me in your posts :D

#erwin smith x reader #aot fanfiction #aot x reader #erwin x reader #erwin smith fanfiction #rie answers #aot fanfic #aot x you #aot x y/n #erwin smith x you #erwin smith x y/n #erwin x you #erwin x y/n #erwin smith imagine #erwin smith fanfic

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bookishfeylin · 2 months

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Hello! I hope you are doing well :)

(I needed help from a translator to write this, I apologize for the errors that this text will probably have)

Firstly, I would like to express my admiration for you. I cultivated it through reading the criticisms so well placed by you about the universe of ACOTAR.

I, having had a very intense relationship with reading over the years, was starting to despair after reading the first three ACOTAR books because I felt very alone when I realized that apparently there were almost no real critical analyzes (that I had found) about this book saga. It was then that I found Tumblr and, along with it, some very interesting profiles that talked about what I wanted to talk about. Yours was one of them.

My experience with ACOTAR is quite complex. When I first heard about it (given its growing fame), I loved the plot, as I love reading fantasy. I cultivated expectations on my own, but I also place this on fame and people's enthusiasm (and hatred) for some characters that I will later mention. So I read it… and damn, I was so disappointed after the second book. I fell off the horse completely, as some would say here where I live. I couldn't believe how SJM started to fail so much with the entire initial proposal of the books and how she managed to fail in developing characters and plots with so much potential. Furthermore, the romanticization of abuses, retcons, plot holes, catchphrases to deceive readers, narratives conflicting with actions, failure to make clear the biased narrative... among many other things. But one of the things that shocked me the most was how, to this day, many people fail to see certain FACTS and the FAULTS in all of this, their only reactions when these are pointed out are irrational responses in defense of this created illusion. Rhysand is the most disappointing character I've ever read in my life, perhaps because I see the potential that could be used in him, Sarah's true protagonist (this is just one of the things that completely annoy me about the author and, consequently, the character).

I could cite MANY examples of the flaws I mentioned, as you mentioned throughout your posts, but one thing that really bothers me is the way the characters and the fandom itself treat Nesta, trapped in the blind illusion that everything that IC does is the right thing, since that's what they think and say. It's really disgusting. I don't know why in the world I deluded myself into thinking that Nesta being the protagonist of Silver Flames would improve anything by knowing her critical perspective on the IC and things in general, since she is not very influential and very observant. I honestly don't know why I did this to myself, knowing what SJM did with the previous books.

Tamlin and Nesta are sensitive points for me, being the main characters that led me to, in fact, have an increasingly critical view of these books (they were my critical awakening). I realized that one of the main common points that makes me upset is the way Rhysand deals with them, just like he deals with anyone: the way he wants, without reprimands (sometimes it's even encouraged). As if it were his right.

I understand that Rhysand's relationship with each of them has different complex layers, especially with Tamlin as it is a story that has been developing for much longer and is something personal to Rhysand AND Tamlin (in contrast to Nesta, who had never done anything for him), although there are very superficial mentions of it in proportion to how much Rhys gets involved and returns to it throughout the books (some would say that he simply needs to have Tamlin in his life constantly because of the way he always finds a way to mention it him or go see him, he can't let go). I have A LOT of things to say about this, but I'm summarizing.

About Nesta, someone very young in comparison and who was hated by Rhys before he even met her. He didn't even give her a chance to observe her a little or ask her anything. I would think he should be intelligent and more mature because of his age and how he likes to show that he knows how to handle things, but that's not what his actions show in most of the books.

Sometimes I think he picks on Nesta and Tamlin so much because they are the only ones who actually stand up to him, question him and throw his actions in his face. They don't accept his stance easily and they have the courage to respond accordingly. They are the big stones in his expensive and nocturne shoes.

I'm not going to start talking too much about Feyre per se, but I would like to point out that I hate with all my mental strength the daemati shipp feysand and I hope in a childish way that they fictionally read this in my mind. In my view, they have absolutely nothing good or remotely interesting to add and develop from each other. Rhysand calls them equals in every way, but he always knows things and chooses what to say to her as is convenient for him. He tells her she has a choice, but he is the only one who provides the options he wants her to choose. Feyre stopped questioning, she believes anything he says from the start. She even stopped analyzing her own actions. He gives her a false appearance of power and she pretends that she knows how to use it. On the first opportunity to introduce her to the CoN, he undermines any kind of respect they could develop for her, whether through fear (as stupid and lame as that may be) or what. Her personality was an ocean and since she started dating Rhys, the ocean had become a shallow puddle of mud. It seems that the trend is getting worse, seeing as how SJM has been showing us who her main character is. Feyre was a means to the end, nothing about her position in this saga was constructed in a decent way, unfortunately. Rhys does what he wants and doesn't have the limits he should have, bringing this to Feyre when in Summer he tells Tarquin that she does whatever she wants, without thinking about the consequences, just because she carries a title that Rhys gave to her. She can do what she wants because HE is saying so. It's not about Feyre, as the catchphrase makes it seem. This is not a moment taken to glorify her in front of others. At this moment Rhysand wants to show and prove his power to another male who should have the same authority as him, Tarquin. This guy's ego, seriously.

Anyway, amidst so many opinions about the things I'm curious to know, I'd like to ask what you think is the REAL reason for Rhys' growing dislike towards Nesta (and Tamlin too, if you want. I I don't buy the superficiality with which the whole thing about the murder of their families was told, but that's just me pondering). And the possibilities surrounding Nesta and Rhysand's complex relationship, expectations and even what you would have changed. If you want to respond, of course.

Today I found myself reflecting on this specifically and I'm still putting things together in my head, so I decided to share this question with you.

This “message” was much longer than I expected, I ended up getting carried away and had to stop myself from saying more. At this point, I don't even judge if you haven't read it, hehe. I appreciate it anyway if you read any part of this.

Anyway, thank you very much for sharing your analysis. I feel so represented with them! I will continue to follow you here, XD

Xx, Tess

Awwww I got teary reading this message! Thank you so much, Tess! And I agree with so much of what you’ve said here! This book series crumbles under the slightest bit of analysis, and I’m glad so many of us have started to realize that. I’m glad you feel represented here and ill definitely continue to be here :)

#Ask #anon #SJM critical #anti acomaf

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