#because he seems like he’s just egotistical enough to want to fuck himself very literally

[strangesickness]

bodyguard!eddie...

but you might be wondering! why would eddie choose a job as potentially dangerous as a bodyguard?

consider: i will do anything to make silly AUs. mostly kidding. consider for real this time: what he does in the novel and the miniseries, he drives cars in new york. car accidents kill something like 1.3 million people a year, 1000 or so of those people are new yorkers. you can't tell me bro doesn't know this.

but why being a bodyguard specifically? idk man! he finally got out of his mom's house and was angry enough that he really wanted to stick it to her and when he finished college he decided, "yknow what? fuck this. i get a 'safe' office job and i'll die by 55 from the stress. i might as well do something more interesting." or maybe he was frequenting the gym in college and someone suggested he do it as a weekend job. idk man. point is. bodyguard eddie <3 he probably starts with really basic shit that puts him at subzero risk, he does security for a couple small conventions, he mans the door at a small club on weeknights, etc.

but later he's richie's bodyguard. obviously. because i'm predictable. probably after quite a few years as a bodyguard. maybe when they're in their mid thirties. he thinks the job is kind of stupid. like who even cares about some asshole comedian who's jokes your nephew in eighth grade could, and probably has, come up with. richie doesn't really need a bodyguard, he's not that big a deal, and he's like twice eddie's size so whats even the point, and he thinks this seems kind of egotistic to be honest.

and because i think it's cute when adult reddie meet for the first time and eddie can't stand richie: eddie can't stand richie. he's always late, he doesn't seem to take his job seriously, he isn't very funny, he keeps flirting with eddie... okay maybe he's growing less annoyed by that last one by the day. but like. the list goes on.

eddie is Very Serious and Professional, and richie's like "pls pls pls can we go to five guys after this pls?" and eddie's like. "no. but i guess if we have to go somewhere we can go to panera bread. i guess." (he is not subtle at all about wanting to hang out with richie. he tries to pretend he's just doing his job but like. he caught himself laughing at richie's joke one time and he knew he had lost.)

after a while eddie is thinking that they're actually becoming friends and richie is getting lunch with him because they're friends, but then his paycheck comes in and it's way more than he expected because richie's paying for his time during their stupid outings to wendy's, and eddie's like. ????

richie generally speaking does not have any issues that require a bodyguard, he got a bodyguard because of an incident with an overzealous fan, but that was really a one in a thousand experience. eddie's job mostly consists of trying to look intimidating and getting people out of the way when richie's trying to leave events.

but like. then there is an altercation of some sort, and eddie has to physically remove someone from backstage or something. and richie is never the same. like yeah eddie is hot and cute and fun to be around, but he's like. dealing. and then he sees eddie manhandling someone much taller and heavier than him, and realizes eddie could probably carry him, and it's so over. he is just in a constant state of thinking about eddie literally sweeping him off his feet (and carrying him to bed👀).

also because i live for the drama i think eddie should get to dramatically save richie from an attacker. i don't know who is attacking him but someone is and eddie is swooping in and saving the day and maybe tearful confessions follow idk.

anyways bodyguard!eddie i love you <3

#i literally just open this website every day and make shit up #it stephen king #it 2019 #it 2017 #eddie kaspbrak #richie tozier #reddie #red's ramblings #posts afflicted with a strange sickness

[cookinguptales]

Related to that last rant:

Nandor and Guillermo both have extreme control issues, though they manifest in different ways, and they're both going to keep fucking up their lives until they can find a way to cede that control to each other in healthy ways!

Nandor used to be in control of his own country, but he doesn't want to be in charge anymore! He's become the peacemaker of the group, strangely enough, and he plays at being in control of the house but he's always much happier when he cedes that control to someone else -- especially Guillermo. Every person in that house already knows that Nandor no longer has the heart for tyranny (Laszlo was especially blunt about it) but the problem is that Nandor doesn't know who he is if he's not some kind of dictatorial warlord.

(He's Guillermo's guy wife, clearly, but he's still figuring out that he really, really likes taking care of Guillermo right back.)

Nandor's really struggling with giving up control (in the household, in the council, in the vampiric community) if just because he doesn't know what the alternative is, and that uncertainty frightens him. And that's the real control issue. He's afraid of change because then he can't control what goes on in his life! He's afraid of his relationship changing with Guillermo because he can't control the direction it will go! Guillermo makes him uneasy, if interested, because Guillermo is the one thing he can't control at all!

It excites him but it also terrifies him and that guy needs to learn to let go and enjoy the ride!

And then on the other side you have Guillermo, who has more of a nurturing kind of control issue? He's taken care of these vampires for over a decade and he knows how quickly everything goes to shit without him. It's given him a little bit of a savior complex, but he also desperately needs to be needed.

It's sort of egotistical because he always believes that he knows better than everyone else what the household needs, and he believes no one can do these things better than he can. He's surrounded by idiots, so he isn't entirely wrong, but he isn't entirely right, either. He isn't always correct when it comes to what's best for everyone around him (and his tendency to try to manipulate the vampires is very irritating to them) but the bigger issue is burnout. Guillermo thinks no one can do these things like he can (see: his issues with Topher) so he won't let anyone help him. He just takes on more and more and more responsibility until he runs himself into the ground.

For the most part, the vampires let him do this. But in The Wedding, you could really see the logical conclusion to this problem and even they were starting to worry. We'd seen Guillermo do that kind of thing before -- like when he wouldn't allow himself to sleep when the assassins were coming because he assumed that if he ever took his eye off the vampires, they'd die. But we hadn't quite seen him destroy himself to that extent before, and even Nandor had to acknowledge that he was driving him too hard.

The problem is that... like... Guillermo will literally just keep taking on responsibilities until he collapses. He'll say "well, no one else can do this right" so he won't accept any help or admit defeat. He has this almost pathological need to be needed, but that's a manifestation of a control issue, isn't it? He feels like if he drops the reins for even a second, everyone he loves will get hurt.

It's not healthy, Guillermo! You need to learn to take breaks and ask for help! They love you now! They'll probably do it! Even Nadja was sticking up for you in The Wedding!

Besides, you can see his rising resentment towards them, which is fair because they treat him like shit but also unfair because they didn't actually ask him to do most of what he does. Many of Guillermo's responsibilities (especially his daytime ones) seem to be self-imposed, and his protective instincts definitely are. He runs the household so efficiently that they don't even seem to realize how much he does for them, which shows that he's a great familiar but has also allowed them to take him for granted. That's hurtful to him, but he also hasn't demanded respect until very, very recently.

I want Nandor to allow himself to let go of his need to be a figurehead and I want Guillermo to allow himself to let go of his need to have the real power in the household. Neither one of them actually has to run things here, and they're making themselves miserable. I think if Nandor allows himself to serve Guillermo a little bit for once and if Guillermo allows himself to accept that help, they'll both be a lot happier.

They both need a vacation. :') A real one, not the year-long disaster we had between s3 and s4. Come on, guys, let yourself lean on someone for once and admit that you don't have all the answers.

#wwdits meta #wwdits #nandermo #guillermo de la cruz #nandor the relentless

[egg-emperor]

not sure if you didn't get my ask the first time but what about Sonic X , version of Eggman? its Yuji Naka's vision and he isn't that evil as many of the other characters that appear in the series, I would really love to hear what you think about it as an Eggman fan

Oh I did get your ask, I was just trying to think of the best way to word my answer.

X Eggman has a very special place in my heart for being one of my first pieces of Sonic media, aside from Heroes and Shadow 2005. As you may know, that two games didn't have that much Eggman in them and his character was being mistreated with the way he was being sidelined. But something about Eggman was already appealing to me and I wanted to see more of him, so I watched X before getting any other games. It was one of the first bigger looks I got at Eggman as a result.

X really helped me fall in love with Eggman because I got to see much more of him and how charming, funny, and evil he can be. Literally every time he was on screen he made me smile and laugh, I just found him so entertaining. I still do to this day and I rewatch it annually. But it wasn't the idea they tried to push of him being 'not that evil' or capable of doing good that appealed to me about his character from the very beginning. I loved all the evil and assholic things he did throughout the show.

He still had evil, selfish, and rude moments that made him look like a big dick and I loved it. The idea of him suddenly caring for Sonic and friends later on came out of nowhere and I don't like how it was handled, so I like to imagine it was just another one of his acts to get on their good side, so they could all defeat the Metarex. I know that wasn't really the case and I'm not very happy about it. It was random and out of nowhere and it contradicts things that Eggman did in this very show. It downplays his villainy for no good reason.

I think the "when you actually hurt them, that's going too far" line was one of the most ridiculous things to come out of Eggman's mouth of all people. It makes him so hypocritical, even when it comes to his portrayal in the show because he still hurt plenty, attempted to kill Sonic and friends, tried to blow up Station Square, and did countless other terrible destructive things, and there's no way that multiple of his plans didn't result in collateral damage.

Chris wasn't even the exception either because remember when he jumped onto Eggman's Egg Mobile in an attempt to take the emerald, and when he grabbed Eggman's mustache, he shook him off and sent him plummeting to his doom? Where was the good in his heart when he allowed the twelve year old to fall and almost die and only cared about the fact that he'd just accidentally let the emerald fall with him? It doesn't seem very kind and caring to me, but very in character selfish, as he should be. So yeah, he's one to talk in that scene when he's even put Chris in harm's way himself.

In the Japanese version of that line, he said he doesn't hurt hostages. But what I think would've be more in character would be that he just wouldn't care if hostages get hurt, as long as they're still alive to use as the bait. I said in the little rant that I slipped into my Eggman X supercut season 3 video that the only way I could really see the scene working was if Eggman was just pretending to take the moral high ground just to piss off the Metarex or something. Because otherwise it just really doesn't make sense.

I despise the Metarex for being boring villains with generic designs. They really wanted us to think they were amazing, powerful, and scary but they were try hard and had no interesting motive. Eggman made them look stupid by pointing out how their plan doesn't make sense and results in destroying planets so they won't have anything to rule over and prove their power to. They have a boring motive, unlike Eggman who has an egotistical dream that he'll go to great lengths to accomplish, rather than just being "haha I'm so evil I'm going to destroy everything for no reason"

It feels like just another case of Eggman's villainy being downplayed in an attempt to emphasize how much better of a villain and bigger of a threat others are supposed to be, which I'm never a fan of because it's not true. Eggman isn't innocent compared to them, he just has a better plan that doesn't involve just destroying the world. And when you have to either put Eggman down or make him act OOC so he doesn't seem as evil, then they're clearly not good villains that can prove themselves on their own. Other villains shouldn't take away from Eggman, instead we should be told why we should see these villains as a dangerous threat like Eggman.

I can't take away the idea that 'oh Eggman is actually a kind and caring guy compared to the big scary super evil Metarex' away from the scene. He's a terrible person too, the only reason he frowns upon the Metarex's acts isn't because he has a good heart, it's because they're going to destroy everything he wants to conquer. Eggman has always been selfish and only cared about what he wants and he doesn't care who gets hurt as long as he gets it. This even applied to X Eggman himself earlier on in the show.

If he was truly a good guy, why wasn't he holding back and showing care from the start? When people were getting hurt because of his actions and he was intentionally trying to kill others, why were there so many moments of him clearly enjoying it? And if it was supposed to be seen as some type of character development, they didn't do a very good job at showing it because him actually being concerned for others came out of nowhere. And even so, I just don't think it works for Eggman because if there isn't some secret evil and selfish motive behind his actions, it just makes him a big hypocrite.

But besides that bothering me because it's not the kind of development I think Eggman should have, I love X Eggman for many other reasons in a way that I can rewatch the show without it getting to me much. But I still really wish they would've done some things differently because earlier on it seemed like they had the right idea but had to bring that whole twist out of nowhere which I just don't think suits a deeply selfish, narcissistic, dangerous man that lacks empathy. (Because yes, there were even blatant moments in X that showed Eggman's low empathy was still there. That's how he does the things he does without shame.)

And one thing that stops me from being as bitter about it in the end is that, despite who was involved with X in Japan, it's still clearly very separate from the games. Just like how Boom Eggman, who is also portrayed as being a nicer Eggman, is entirely separate. Game universe Eggman has done a lot more evil, selfish, fucked up catastrophic shit than both X and Boom Eggman combined and clearly has no ounce of remorse. That's why I've never been a fan of people attempting to merge the separate universes/canons together when they just don't work.

There's nothing in the games that implies game Eggman has this same mindset and ability to care about anyone other than himself, unlike X or Boom Eggman. And even though X Eggman was the first time I got to see a version of him really in action, it didn't shape my view of him in the games because I could recognize the differences. I'm happy that it didn't affect his game portrayal because I already think those moments in X were OOC enough for X Eggman when they contradict his actions, so it would've made even less sense for him in the game universe.

The concept of him being not such a bad guy doesn't need to be a part of his character to make him charming, lovable and entertaining to me. He's perfect just the way he is as the prideful, selfish, egotistical bastard that I fell in love with. 💜

#asks #dr eggman #eggman #dr robotnik #dr. eggman #sonic x #analysis #opinion #my post

[trashcatsnark]

NGL I love how much you have embraced the silverv stuff here - its so nice to read. I submit for consideration, Rogue notices the tattoo while on the disaster date and both Johnny and V play it off as a joke and holy shit poor rogue stuck in a room with two morons.

Also - V getting dressed for that date and realizing they just MIGHT be a little jealous with a side of some thoughts of "Oh God Johnny Would NEVER Feel That Way About Me Gotta Bury This Deep So He Doesn't Know"

Johnny notices the anxiety but is very dense about the cause.

Oh hell yeah, I have fully embraced it and this ship; I was writing SilverV porn before the game came out, like I knew what my ship for this game was gonna be from the second I saw gifs of

“You’re a dick, Johnny” 

“And you’re a cunt, so maybe we’ll fit together after all.” 

That banter sealed my fate and I’m fairly sure I had named and created my V then wrote porn of her with Johnny literally a week later. The devil works hard, but my brainrot works harder and faster. 

Spoilers! 

Okay, so I’ve thought a lot about that date in both a silverv context (and largely how it fits with my V, Aidan and her fic) I’ll try to stay general though. 

Firstly, I whole heartedly believe Rogue sees through their bullshit. Not only is she just good at that, but Johnny even states she has MRE’s (?) and can see through people, like her eyes can pick up on signs of lying. And usually, thats not an issue for when V talks to her, but when she asks about Johnny and their relationship with him. Its a mess. And when Rogue asks Johnny about it, its a mess. 

And when Rogue notices the tattoo it’s like Oh... I get it . And Johnny is of course like, “hahaha, yeah I thought that’d be so funny, the kid hates it.” But Rogue isn’t stupid, she knows a lovey dovey heart with their names, something that looks like someone doodled it on their third grade notebook about their crush, is not really typical of Johnny’s “joking” She knows that if Johnny is not really the kind of guy to hahahaha its so funny to make it look like we love each other; he’d be more likely to get a dick tattooed on V’s arm if it was just to mess with them. For gods sake, look how many people didn’t pick “the other one” because they were convinced it was gonna be a dick. That’s a Johnny just trying to fuck with someone move. So, she doesn’t buy it, but doesn’t push it...with him. 

She asks V about and of course they play it off as “Yeah, Johnny thought it’d be funny, what a fucking asshole, its so fucking dumb, I totally fuckin hate it.” 

“So, why not get it removed?” 

“Uhhhhhhhhhhh, well you see what had happened was, um, I, just uhhhh, never been enough time, I guess yeahhhhhh.” 

Cause lets face it, in cyberpunk universe, getting a tattoo removed should be easy. If you can get blades in your arms and can have a completely newly reconstructed body in like an afternoon; you can get a tattoo removed in like twenty minutes. So, V still keeping it, says volumes about how they really feel.

Now, V’s jealousy and the date. 

I do absolutely agree that any anxiety or ill feeling V might have up until the date; Johnny is gonna feel, but not realize where it’s coming from. I think if anything, he’s gonna chalk it up to V being anxious about giving him control again and he’s gonna be like worried that maybe V doesn’t trust him as much as they let on. 

And I do think a V who has feelings for Johnny, would not be able to help feeling some jealousy regarding Rogue and Johnny. Just because jealousy is natural thing to feel and while you can debate if they were ever a good or healthy couple, you can’t debate they shared very real feelings for one another. And I think a lot of V’s jealousy would come from just how much Johnny seems to first think of/go to Rogue. When he needed to save Alt, first person he turned to, Rogue. When he wanted to bomb Arasaka tower (going by his memory of it and ignoring that the event was probably actually planned by Morgan Blackhand), who’d he go to? Rogue. When he becomes determined to get Smasher, who is he determined to get him with, Rogue. When he first decides to atone for his past mistakes, who’s the first person he wants to make up with, Rogue. When at the rooftop, who does he want to go grab to help him save V, Rogue. 

If you got feelings for someone, that’d hurt, I think it’s impossible for that not to spark some jealousy. And V if anything is also mad at themselves for having those feelings, because they like Rogue, she’s a badass, a legend, they respect the hell out of her. And of course they have feelings for Johnny and they wanna help him make shit right and they wanna give him a chance to enjoy himself. But this stupid reptilian part of their brain is screaming but i want to be the first person he goes to, the first person he thinks about, which they know is also stupid cause for fucks sake the man literally lives in their brain, they’re as close as two people can be and literally when Johnny has the power to go to someone for something, he can’t go to V because they’re reduced to sleeping essentially until Johnny hands back the reigns. Yet, feelings aren’t aren’t always, rational, sadly. 

And to Johnny’s credit, he probably doesn’t even give it that much thought. Rogue is a badass, someone he cares for, someone he can depend on and someone he hurt really badly. The two people he can and always has been able to depend on the most (other than Alt prior to her death) have been Kerry and Rogue. And, bless his heart, the fuck is Kerry gonna do? Kerry ain’t a merc, Kerry isn’t gonna bust into Arasaka Tower or plant a bomb. Kerry doesn’t have the connection to Smasher. So, of course, Rogue is gonna be his go to. And in terms of making things up to people...he literally cannot really do much to make things up to V, not the way he can for Rogue or Kerry. Cause, when him and V are both conscious, he can’t do much beyond touch and talk to them. Hell, even with Rogue and Kerry, he relies mostly on V to help him do anything. Even with people he can interact with and do something for; V is doing all the nitty gritty work for him. V drives Rogue to the theater, V breaks into the theater, V gets the projector going. V breaks into Kerry’s house, V disables the security. V gets in contact with Nancy. V gets Nancy out of Totentanz in one piece. 

Which probably if V actually thought about it critically, does mean he’s going to them and relying on them more than Rogue, but they’d probably dismiss it out of it being for necessity and not because he cares about them and feels he an depend on them. 

Anyhow, Johnny would probably love to do some nice gesture to make up for his bender to V, hell they probably were the first person he wanted to make things up since they are his catalyst for changing. But what feasibly can he do for them? Anything he’d want to do with/for them, would just be asking V go do this thing and i’ll also be here. Anything that would put them in public interacting is out, unless they want MaxTac called on V for looking cyberpsychotic. He can’t even do an at home date, because he can’t cook (engram or not) and he can’t buy them anything nice he has no money and also doesn’t technically exist. He could try to do so sneakily while he’s in control...but he’d be using V’s money so they might as well just buy it for themselves. he can play music for them,,. but that doesn’t seem too special and more than a little egotistical to think it’ll make V feel better about what he did... So... all he can really do, is prove he’s worth trusting by being on his best behavior and more importantly do what he can to save V’s life. 

Then there’s the date. And as usual, I have some opinions and feelings about a thing.  Like, okay, I’ve seen some people (aka Gamer Bros on Twitter) being like, Rogue is Johnny’s girl. Wanting to date either of them is wrong because they like each other. (then you also get the BUT ALT crowd, but rants for another day.) And I can’t help but ask, did we play the same date? Their entire date is about how they’re both desperately clinging to the past. Rogue is trying to reclaim 2013-2023 Rogue and Johnny just wanting for a night to feel like the world and his place in it haven’t been completely rearranged. And it ends with Rogue telling him, she is not that girl anymore, she can’t pretend to be, and frankly she doesn’t want to anymore. She wishes she could be, wishes she was still that tall haired street punk who’d never dream of working with corps or being a fixer, but she’s not. Her and Johnny are no longer the same people who met back in to 2010’s. Doesn’t mean they don’t care about one another and doesn’t mean what feelings they had weren’t real or important; but they’re just not those people anymore. Rogue more so than Johnny since he’s freshly on the course of change.   

Something else in regards to the date, that I think is important to talk about and how it relates to silverv and its something I personally have very conflicting feelings about. The fact that Johnny can initiate some physical intimacy with Rogue. See, I have never chosen the option to kiss Rogue during the date and actually did not learn until relatively recently, that if that choice is made it goes a biiit further than a kiss. I have watched the scene now.

And god I have mixed feelingssss. Like, I get it, but I’m not sure I like it. And I know full well, my silverv bias impacts my feelings on the matter, it’s be disingenuous to say otherwise. But I don’t think the ship is purely my reason for having these feelings. But at the end of the day, its all opinions. So, I get from a character perspective that Johnny and Rogue are trying so hard to reclaim their past and what they use to have that they get caught up in trying do what they would do if this was the 2010’s. And Johnny’s relationships as we’ve seen are very physical, sexual chemistry and attraction are major factors in his relationships because he kept things very superficial most of the time. He even says part of the issue with his relationship with Rogue is at the time he didn’t realize he could let her see the true him and still hid behind walls, kept things at a distance. So, the idea that’d they fall back into the old habit of trying to just be physical and ignore their feelings, isn’t out of character. 

However, and Johnny even seems to acknowledge this issue when Rogue interrupts it, they’re doing this with V’s body. V...who did not consent to sexual contact. They consented to a date and while one could logic that this would mean everything a date could entail up to and including physical intimacy; I would argue that that is something that would need further conversation to have clear consent. And like again, this might come down to boundaries and personal feelings. Because I go back to the bender and what’s been interesting to me is too see different opinions on it; some people weren’t actually bothered at all by Johnny’s bender in V’s body, some people were bothered by the drugs and alcohol specifically cause their V is straight edge. Me, personally, it was the sexual content and the endangering of V’s life. Like, it was mostly funny and oh yeah, I expected that it’s bad but eh I’ll move on, to me, until he started getting sexual with people in V’s body. Like that to me is not just crossing the line, it’s catapulting over it. 

And like I said, Johnny even responds to Rogue’s “this isn’t fair” with “what, you mean it’s not fair to V?” which she says she meant it isn’t fair to Johnny. (Which viscerally upset because you nearly used V’s body for sexual gratification without their consent and you’re worried about Johnny, which tbf Rogue has no way of knowing what V has and hasn’t consented to, so its not on her but that was my knee jerk thought). So, he has some awareness that maybe that was a bad move. 

And yeah, it definitely to me and my V would be a very bad move (unless he explicitly talked to them beforehand and got consent). And in general, it made me feel like, dude, you just promised you’d be better and not break V’s trust but again not a day later you’re nearly using them to have sex. It felt like a backslide, which isn’t necessarily unrealistic, cause change and growth is not always linear, people can commit to changing themselves and still fuck up and not get it right; in fact it’s rare for them not to have any sort of backsliding or repeating of mistakes. 

Again, I will also give credit that he could have been assuming that given V consented to the date, they assumed or were cool with their being physical intimacy between him and Rogue. He also generally, might not have really planned for it to happen, because I don’t think Johnny plans a lot of anything. It very well might have just sort of happened. Also, V doesn’t clearly communicate if the sexual component was an issue in the bender. All V really seems to have an issue with in game is the very general thing of; he misled them and used them. So, he might have assumed that wasn’t ever an issue. And hell, if you wanna go full meta, the player is technically the one who makes that choice and V is largely an avatar for the player, so that alone could be seen as whether or not V would/does consent. 

But, from a story perspective, removing the player choice element. I think how that’s handled would have a huge impact on silverv and where it goes from there. 

Because if V and Johnny did talk about consent prior and V did consent while having feelings for Johnny, god I’d have to imagine they’d still feel pretty hurt, but feel it’s irrational to feel that way and have put their own feelings aside because clearly Johnny cares about and wants Rogue and they should ruin what could be his one chance to make things right. 

If there like in game was no talk of consent and Johnny ends up kissing and touching on Rogue and V finds out or has memories of it surface,that could be devastating for them. Not only from their own feelings for Johnny, but this since of betrayal and hurt. Was the oil field conversation just a lie? A manipulation? V might feel like they were used; that Johnny never gave a shit about them or how they feel. And Johnny would have to deal with the realization that intentionally or not; he earned back V’s trust just to destroy it again. He fucked up again, he ruined everything again, he got his second chance and destroyed it…. And he doesn’t know how, if he can, or if he should bother trying to ask for a third. In general, I do think, V would come out of the date assuming (naturally so) that Johnny really only has romantic feelings towards Rogue, that they’re just a friend at best, a host to be used at worse. I even in my own universe with my V have them after everything is better, everyones got a body, expects Johnny to start pursing Rogue and trying to swallow their own feelings and be a supportive friend, try to encourage and push him to do it and Johnny’s just like please stop, Rogue is this close to murdering us both.

I was gonna add more funny stuff to this and include a shitposty interaction he has with my V over them dressing up for the date and shit, BUT HOLY FUCK THIS GOT LONG AND SAD????? I’M SO SORRY.

#cyberpunk 2077 #cp2077 #johnny silverhand #silverv #cyberpunk 2077 spoilers #ieiwi

[wehatejulietsimms]

A/N: i'm gonna respond to this in sections bc it's quite long so bare with me.

Howdy y’all, 🤠 again. Yes, I didn’t in fact die. I’m sorry though that I kept getting sidetracked and couldn’t submit this until now, my boss decided to keep dumping her work into my lap. So I just wanna preface this by stating that I’m going to try and say what I want to as coherent as possible, but I have pretty severe ADHD so I’m not always as easy to understand as I think I am in my head, and I often go off on tangents, over explain things and circle back to topics randomly without realizing. Im basically going to go over their relationship over the years as I said previously (I’m not gonna go into detail about every single scandal and shitty thing Juliet did over the years, because we’d be here all year. so I figure I won’t cover them here, but rather let people ask specific questions if they want to. Remember, I was present for pretty much everything so feel free to ask.😊), but I’m also going to do kind of a mini deep dive into Andy’s behavior and actions (because although the snakes will hit you with every excuse in the book, and tell you that you’re looking too far into things and that it doesn’t matter, it does. The way a person acts in general and towards people around them is very relevant when talking about someone’s health, happiness, and well-being.) To start off, let’s take it all the way back to the time before Juliet’s reign of terror, when Andy and Scout were still together. In all honesty from what I saw of them together (and I saw pretty much everything they posted, I’m only a year younger than Andy, and I was quite into him when he was on MySpace and such, and I always watched anything with him and Scout together because they were fucking adorable lol) they had a really healthy relationship. Not once did I get weird vibes from them. The way Andy acted toward and with Scout, you could tell they really loved each other and were happy together. They had nothing to prove. It just was normal. (For any of you who are younger, or didn’t come into the picture until Andy was already post-scout and would like to see some videos of them together, you could generally search on YouTube for it, but also there’s a specific channel on there called like bring the milk tea or something that has videos of old Andy blogs and also Andy and scout on stickam and such. Worth a look if you’re curious) They weren’t constantly all over each other like possessive pack dogs *ahem Juliet ahem* and whenever Andy mentioned scout he didn’t need to shower her in compliments. They both seemed very secure in both themselves and the relationship. Super cute. Initially when they broke up it seemed quite odd. I didn’t really expect it. It got even weirder when he states that he and Juliet are together. It didn’t feel like they fit together at all (and no I’m not talking about from a fame or success perspective. At least not yet lol) As I’ve said I got bad vibes from Juliet right from the get go. Andy already seemed to be acting not like himself. (Also snakeys have argued that it’s just that he’s more mature now and that’s why he acts nervous and constantly looks Ike he wants to die. 🙄 maturity doesn’t mean losing your fucking personality and being unhappy most of the time. Jesus Christ.) it seemed like they got possessive of each other and constantly needed to show people how in love they were. Pictures, videos, and fucking public love paragraphs to show they are, in fact, in a super real relationship and they love each other. It also felt like Andy’s family was in on this whole weird charade.They (Chris honestly) started to defend her degenerate behavior and attack anyone who had even a whisper of negative things to say about her or their relationship. It was like watching a group of awkward, pretty mediocre actors put on a play about them being together. (I’ve hit the text limit now, but there will be more that I will write just after I submit this one though, fear not haha. N, you can either post this now or wait until I submit the rest, it’s up to you.) 1 / ? -🤠

A/N: i was here for a lot of it as well so i do remember some of this. although i did join the fandom shortly after him and juliet got together (i joined like around the time she was on the voice) i literally remember hoping that him and scout would get back together bc juliet just rubbed me the wrong way and i didn't know why at the time. & side note i actually do recommend people go look at old videos of andy and scout they were really adorable. there is this one video of them singing (i think a carrie underwood song lol) in the car and it's really cute. but yeah just bc he's older doesn't mean his whole entire personality changes. you can be any age and act however you want. i could even use jenna marbles & julien solomita (a youtube couple) as an example, they've been together for i think like 8 or 9 years and are about the same age as A&J (julien being around andy's age & jenna around juliet's age) & although they can have mature adult conversations and all of that, they still act like idiots and joke around together. neither of them look uncomfortable or are afraid of saying certain things like andy is around juliet. so andy aging doesn't mean shit in regards to his personality doing a 180.

🤠okay, so part two here we go. (Also I apologize if I get the chronological order of anything I talk about incorrect, I’m a bit scattered sometimes and the next ask I make will be the one where I talk about the domestic abuse and I tend to get quite heated, which only makes my brain function worse lol) so the point at which Andy was trying to get fans to go vote for/ support Juliet when she was on the voice seemed really fishy. I’m all for supporting the work of the people you love, but it’s kinda strange how hard Andy was pushing this at the time. Too hard in my opinion. I’m obviously aware that it was helpful in the end and he more or less got what he was asking for. But it was like he absolutely needed people to vote for her. As if he would get in trouble if they didn’t. So around 2012 or 2013 it felt like things really went down the shitter from there and just got progressively worse. (I never knew why for the longest time, but after they revealed that Vegas wedding that happened in about that time frame, it made a lot of sense.) Andy’s behavior began to change towards his fans. There are a lot of accounts of this happening from fans themselves and a lot of people said that 1. It was worse with Juliet around, and 2. a lot of the time it would happen towards females especially. ( I think more towards the “pretty” fans but don’t count me on that, I don’t know for sure.) This was completely night and day. Especially coming from the same man who used to always defend his fans and once stated something along the lines of he would never have a crazy or awkward fan story because he loves and is grateful for all of his fans and he won’t get upset if they’re just really excited. I would understand if these fans crossed the line in some way (like the later incident of fans finding his address and harassing them, which is unacceptable no matter who the people are) but from most if not all of the fan stories I’ve heard, they didn’t. They were being respectful and didn’t do anything to warrant this happening to them besides showing up. Which brings me to my next point, a lot of these negative experiences were caused by Juliet. Either she was the one being mean to people, she was causing Andy to be mean to people on her behalf, or her presence was upsetting Andy to the point that he was angry and started being rude and irritable. What scares me the most are the accounts of Andy having a whole Jekyll and Hyde thing, depending on weather or not Juliet was present. Happy when he’s free of her and miserable when he isn’t. In videos of him where Juliet is behind the camera he always seems nervous and strange. Like he’s afraid to mess up. That’s fucking alarming to say the least. You would think that the last thing one would want to do if another person brings them this much anger, stress, and anxiety, the LAST thing they would want to do is fucking marry them. Right? He literally started barely smiling at one point and really doesn’t anymore. I mean for Christ’s sake look at his wedding photos. What’s suppose to be one of the happiest moments of your life and to quote another anon with a different ask, he looks like he’s being dragged to the gallows. (And I get really fucking Angry honestly when snakeys tries to pass it off as “oh he’s awkward he doesn’t know how to smile” or “omg he’s being dramatic for the aesthetics” in some pictures, yes. But why the fuck would you look like that in pictures with the “love of your life” who you now regularly write cringy paragraphs publicly professing your love and complete adoration for? Andy knows how to smile genuinely. Ffs he used to. He smiled genuinely when he was a kid, he smiled genuinely with scout, and he smiled genuinely when Juliet wasn’t around. He doesn’t smile when she is there, and if he does, it is pretty much always visibly fake.) So I may backtrack a little later, but right now I want to talk about the fact that Juliet IS an abuser. More specifically, the plane incident. (Word limit. TBC.) 2 / ? -🤠

A/N: yes. 100%. when it comes to the wedding photos i will never understand people (specifically snakeys) writing off his behavior as him "just being dramatic for the aesthetics". is that something he would do in photoshoots? yeah. is it something he may do on stage? sure. something he would do in an interview? maybe. but candid shots of him on one of the "happiest days of his life"? wtf no. & idk why people think that.

🤠 Just before I start, again, with the pictures, I really don’t think that Andy is enough of a self absorbed egotistical dick that he would actually sit there and put on the whole “miserable tough guy” act in every fucking photo he takes. Ah yes, the infamous plane incident. So straight up, Juliet exposed herself as an abuser, and brought out every bullshit excuse in the book (and made Andy go along with them) to try to cover it up. 1. She was drunk. Honestly this is total bullshit. I say this same thing when people defend cheating or any other degenerate behavior with the excuse of intoxication and I will say it now. Being drunk does not make you a different fucking person. It does not change the thoughts in your head. What it does do is impair your ability to make decisions and judgement skills in general. It’s the same reason why people drive drunk. It’s routine. Its what they would normally do. And because they’re drunk, they can’t see any reason why they shouldn’t do that. Juliet gets drunk, she and Andy fight, she wants to hit him, and because she’s drunk she doesn’t think that she shouldn’t fucking put her hands on him. 2. She hit him in “self defense” and he broke her ribs.(There’s several points I have debunking this) first of all let’s get this out of the way, no one on that plane (including the very real witness who just so happened to be an adult film actress (I think?) who you so love to discount because of it) saw him strike her or even touch her at any time. Two, you are in fucking airplane seats sitting right the fuck next to each other with an armrest in between. It would be pretty fucking hard to break your ribs unless they were made of actual glass, or Andy’s real name is Bruce fucking banner. Bones are surprisingly strong and I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that it’d be damn near impossible for him to do that to you, which brings me to three, if he had broken your ribs you would not be fucking standing up, thrashing around, whining like a little bitch, and oh by the way, continuing to abuse your husband for the second time on that flight. Four, you had a miscarriage. (When I was trying to conceive with my husband it was very difficult. I had two miscarriages before I finally had my son. I’m fully aware of how devastating having one is.) which is why if you are not lying (which I fully believe that Juliet would stoop that low just to get sympathy, especially with this big of a scandal. But I don’t actually have proof of this so I will say that it is just speculation on my part) I don’t fucking care. I am not unsympathetic to her if this did actually happen as I said, however, You do not get to make any excuse for putting your hands on another person out of anger. Ever. I don’t care who you are, I don’t care what kind of stress you are under, I don’t care if you are inebriated in any way and I sure as hell don’t care what the fuck you have between your legs. You do not hurt anyone. Point blank period. Five. You are a woman, you can’t hurt him. This one, actually enrages me. We all know your crusty ass pulled this one out (and threw around trump supporters a few times for good measure) because you know damn well how society and the media views and deals with abusive women. Women can abuse. Women who are shorter or weaker than their target can abuse. The fact that there are people who either don’t know that or don’t agree with that is absolutely baffling. Six. The same (I believe) porn actress. Literally saw you beating your own face with the restraints you had to be put in (which by the way flight attendants only ever use restraints as an absolute last resort when someone becomes a danger to the others on board, so she had to be acting absolutely deranged) to give yourself a bloody nose to claim Andy hit you. Then you proceed to act like a child and tell Andy to call your fucking dad. (Which kinda proves that whole Scientology thing honestly) what in the hell. I stg as long as I am breathing I will never let this go. This is actual fucking domestic abuse. (Word limit TBC.) 3 / ? -🤠

A/N: yeah her hitting him "bc she was drunk" was never a good excuse not only for the reasons you mentioned but, also bc let's be real at no point are you ever going to get served enough alcohol on a plane to make you that drunk i don't care what anyone says. also when it comes to the excuse of him "breaking her ribs" does she forget that andy actually did break his ribs a while ago? i think she even visited him when he was recovering so she should know what kind of pain he was in. & if he actually broke her ribs, there's no way she would have even been able to stand bc i know andy sure wasn't able to. he said it was one of the most painful things he's experienced. (i don't think i need to comment on the rest of this. it would just be redundant. you hit the nail on the head with that.)

🤠 I don’t care if it happened just that one time ore more likely is an everyday occurrence. Abuse is abuse and should never be tolerated. Kind of getting away from the plane thing. Andy always seems, as it’s been said on here before, afraid to mess up. Like he might mess up, and make her mad. A common behavioral pattern in abuse victims. He also at this point and for a decent amount of time before, doesn’t seem like he loves her anymore. Like he keeps up appearances and pretends, but it’s like it’s a job he’s forced to do. He’s tired and burnt out but was probably manipulated into staying and juliet is probably clinging for dear life. Also I don’t know if I’m the only one who thinks this, but I swear, the veganism and sobering up was just a cover up, most likely formed by either Juliet herself or her fucked up family, after the plane incident to hide their tracks and regain some public favor (because you know, if you advocate for animal rights then you can’t abuse your husband 🙃) Andy never gave a shit before though. Even though it was unhealthy he loved to drink and smoke and was very outspoken about that. And he used to never give a fuck about eating meat or consuming animal products like leather. I mean they’re still selling leather goods ffs. I would get having minor fuck ups because you don’t know any better, but it’s fucking leather. And now Andy is unhealthy and miserable as ever, but the culprit is malnourishment and Juliet rather than cigs, alcohol, and Juliet. My final thoughts: I do definitely believe in the Scientology theory, but if not that than I definitely believe that Andy was and is being manipulated for his fame. On several occasions it really looked like they broke up, including the time when they did, and then said it was a joke. It really doesn’t feel normal. Also, Juliet doesn’t really care about Andy that much. She never wears her wedding ring, she sells all their shit, including sentimental items, and now that she’s gained more popularity from being with him, suddenly doesn’t want to put him in her bio or write him the same creepy ass paragraphs or anything. It’s fucked up how shes so keen to say she did it all herself when really she’s been riding dick for fame since before she even met Andy. It also always kinda seemed to me that Amy was kind of uncomfortable around Juliet. We all know that Chris loves to kiss her ass night and day (most likely to do with the Scientology thing “if” it’s true), but Juliet and Amy always seemed to have a weird relationship like it was tense and forced. Also I just want to mention the time that Juliet talked about screaming at the woman over what I believe was a game night and brushed it off as being competitive and no one gave damn. Fucked up. To finish off this already way too long little series, I think Andy is a very vulnerable insecure person who got manipulated by several people (not just Juliet) some of whom he probably really trusted, and they helped to get him in Juliet’s (equally if not more insecure) hands so she could hurt him as she pleases. I truly hope that even now both he, and his parents (even though Chris really grinds my gears) can get out of this whole shit show, relatively unscathed. I know this is probably pretty unlikely, but hope springs eternal I guess. As I said feel free to ask any questions you may have and I will try to answer them best I can. Thank you for reading. 4 / 4 -🤠

A/N: yet again you hit the nail on the head with this part so i don't need to comment too much. other than the fact that i do agree that juliet and amy's relationship does seem weird.

#submission #anonymous

[jawritter]

30 Minutes In Heaven

Summary: Your life, like many hunters before you, was cut short. You had no idea at the time the Fates that were at play in the universe were really those of dick angles and egotistical assholes with massive god complexes. And you also had no idea that they were really the reason you lost your life, and you had no idea why… Until around 30 minutes after you made it to Heaven.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Reader (Y/N), Jack Kline

Warnings: SPN SERIES FINALE SPOILERS!!!! IF YOU LIVE UNDER A ROCK AND HAVE NOT SEEN IT YET DO NOT READ THIS FIC!!! Brief use of Christian biblical text at the beginning as a reference. Language I’m sure, because hello, it’s me. Slight angst, mentions of character death all over the place, past, present, and upcoming. Some fluff. I don’t want to give too much away.

Word Count: 2722

A Huge fucking thank you to @miss-nerd95​ for Betaing this fic!! You’re a lifesaver!!

A/N: Okay, this was a fic I started before the Series ending, then when it ended I dropped it like a hot object because I just couldn’t finish it, and struggled with the fact that I could easily tie in the canon Dean Winchester ending. Then one of my Patreons requested an ending that placed the reader, Dean’s soul mate, given to him once he made it to Heaven to give Dean the happy ending he deserved, well that’s when I decided to go back and finish it, give Dean and the reader a reunion over there. I was originally going to just post this to Patreon, but I feel like we ALL needed this, so I’m going to be posting it to tumblr and wattpad as well! I hope you all enjoy this one, as it was a bitch to write I’m not gonna lie.

**MASTERLIST**   **BECOME A PATREON**

2 Peter 3:8 Says But, beloved, be not ignorant of this one thing, that one day is with the Lord as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day. 

You had never known  the gravity of that one verse of scripture from your time on earth. It was the only thing that resounded to be true in all that you had experienced once you had made it to Heaven. There was no way of truly knowing exactly how long in earth time you had been here, but something deep down in your heart knew that it had been a very, very long time. You would venture to say it had been close to ten years, but again you couldn’t be sure. 

For you, it had only felt like 30 minutes. 

In that 30 minutes a whole lot of things had taken place. You hadn’t even gotten settled into your little cubicle here before the place began to shake. Then talks of falling angels and power flickering were happening. There were whispers of new gods and old gods, there were whispers of the devil and his death. There were whispers of all manner of things as you stood with your head to the wall of your childhood bedroom. 

One name you kept hearing was Dean. 

Dean Winchester. 

You had been a hunter in your former life, and you had heard of the Winchesters before. Part of you wanted desperately to know what was happening on earth, what could Dean Winchester have done to literally cause Heaven to quake? 

You had tried to find a means of escape, but you seemed trapped in this room, no matter how much you tried to find a way out. 

Then before you even had time to panic, another rumble shook Heaven, and people were saying something about a 'darkness' that had befallen of old. A darkness that had overtaken Dean. That were the longest five minutes of your life. The angels talked of the righteous man that had once shed blood in hell now bathed in it on earth to save the world. 

Over and over again you would catch snippets of stories, passing and confusing glimpses, while you remained trapped behind the all too familiar walls of your prison cell. 

You screamed and pounded, but it all went ignored until a sudden bright light consumed you, almost blinding you completely. 

The next thing you knew, you were standing in a little cabin type of house. One you had always dreamed of having-one you had always hoped for but were never foolish enough to believe you could have due to your lifestyle, right down to the stone fireplace in the corner of the little living room that oozed warmth, and the bookshelf that lined around that, upon closer inspection, had many of your favorite books. 

There were birds chirping outside the windows, and the sun was shining. There were beautiful mountains off in the distance, and for the first time a profound calmness fell on you. You didn’t have time to ponder your sudden release from your prison before a voice behind you made you turn on the spot, old hunter instincts kicking in like they had never left. 

“Hello,” it said, and you turned to find a young boy in a white jacket standing with his hand raised in an almost alien-like greeting and a warm smile on his face. 

“Um-hi,” you responded, slowly taking a step back, more than weary of everything, for it could be an angel or even a demon in this place. 

“Oh, don’t be afraid of me. I’m Jack, Jack Kline,” he said, settling himself against the arm of the old leather couch in the living area of the cabin. 

You had heard whispers of his name before too, but knew very little of him aside from the fact that he seemed to be in the same circles with the Winchesters. His name had been whispered a lot amongst the angels passing down what you could only assume was a hallway by the small room you were trapped in. 

“What do you want?” you questioned him defensively, looking around for anything you could use in case you had to defend yourself against, uh-whatever he was. 

Jack nonchalantly clasped his hands together in front of his lap. Looking around the little cabin fondly, almost like a proud decorator would look at his finished product before his eyes traveled back to your own. 

“This place is cozy, it’s perfect, it’s everything you and he deserves,” he said, grinning at you in an almost childlike manner. It was confusing, and you wanted to run, but for some reason you held your ground. 

“I asked what do you want?” you asked again, and this time Jack nodded before meeting your gaze knowingly. 

“You have no idea who you are, do you?” he asked, the same kind smile on his face. 

You said nothing, just waited there ,watching him for any sudden movements. Jack stood and made his way around the cabin, and looked outside the window next to you, admiring the scenery around with innocent wonder you had forgotten could even exist. 

“You were cheated out of life, Y/N Y/L/N. You were cheated out of a lot of good things you were meant for. You were killed before your time because my grandfather was angry with Dean and couldn’t control him, so he took you away from him before he could ever even have you. In doing so, he took away Dean’s only chance to have any happiness or peace while on Earth.”

Jack turned to face you while you froze up, him seemingly unfazed while you tried to make sense of this riddle he was giving you. Sensing your confusion, Jack gave you a moment before finally speaking again. 

“Do you remember how you died, Y/N?” he asked, and you tried to. It was all really hard to remember. You knew you had been on a hunt that was supposed to be a simple Salt and Burn, but since the Winchesters had opened up the gates of hell a few years back, it wasn’t always what it appeared, just like it wasn’t that time. It was a trap set up by demons, and while you couldn’t remember the pain you went through, or the details of your death, you know that they had been your end game. 

“Chuck sent those Demons to kill you so that Dean would never meet you in this life, and he intended to keep you locked away here forever so you two couldn't get together even in heaven. You were Dean’s soulmate, see. A rare and beautiful thing in the cruel world my grandfather built. You would have grounded Dean, given him a family of his own, a reason to fight against the darkness that he never should have been forced to take on in the first place. If you would have been his, the way you were intended to be, then Dean would never have become a Demon, he would have never had to let go of Lisa or even go to her in the first place, and he wouldn’t be on his way into a warehouse right now to die alone with his brother as witness on a crude piece of rebar.”

Your eyes widened as you struggled to keep up with what this teenager was telling you. You were Dean Winchester’s soulmate, and this Chuck had you killed so that you would never meet him. There was supposed to be no tears in Heaven, or at least that’s what you were always told, but you could feel them slipping down your cheeks as images of what could have been flashed before your mind, no doubt controlled by  whatever power Jack had. 

Images of a little boy in Dean’s arms, images of sensual touches, passionate filled moments, images of yourself and Dean old and sitting on a porch in a rocking chair with your grandchildren played in the yard with a dog that Dean called Miracle. It was all stolen from you. It would never be yours, you were robbed of this man and the life you could have shared together, it was earth shattering. 

“What happened to his Chuck?” you asked, sudden fear gripping you that he would find you free of your prison, and destroy you utterly. 

“Dean defeated him, he’s cursed to live life alone and die as a lowly human. I promise you, it’s more than what he deserves.”

Jack made his way to the front door of the cabin, opening it and stepping out on the porch, leading you to sit down on one of the old wooden rocking chairs, as he took a seat next to you. “He should be here any moment now,” Jack said, smiling at you before looking down the long dirt road almost longingly. 

“What happens when he gets here?” you asked him, following his line of sight, your heart already longing for a man you never knew you missed. 

“He gets to have the heaven he deserves, with you.” 

The ground underneath you seemed to rumble lowly, and Jack’s smile widened as he stood from his perch in the chair next to you before looking at you excitedly. 

“He’s here, Dean’s home,” he said, giving you a smile before stepping out into the open driveway, looking back over his shoulder before yelling at you, “Wait here!” and disappearing on the spot. Leaving you alone with birds singing happily, and your heart pounding in your chest. Images of what should have been still fresh in your mind, and for some reason no doubt at all that he’d be happy to see you here, a reassurance residing in your soul you never understood until now, but knew it was meant to be there all the same.

“Come home to me, Dean,” you whispered to the passing wind, settling down to wait on the man that had saved the world, and now was finally ready to lay down his weary, war beaten heart in the hands of the one person he always longed for, but was forced to do without, you.

Dean’s POV: 

“Right here!” Sam said from the passenger seat of the Impala as Dean turned the wheel into a driveway of what looked like the perfect little farmhouse in the middle of a beautiful clearing not far from where his parents little place was nestled. 

As soon as Dean put Baby in park Sam threw the passenger door open, the front door of the house opening to reveal Jess in a long white dress. Dean had a hard time suppressing the smile as he watched his little brother run into the arms of the woman he had always loved. He was finally home. Sammy was finally happy, and that made him more happy and at peace than he ever thought would be possible. Dean waived to his little brother before he and Jess disappeared inside his new home, leaving Dean alone yet again in the Impala. 

This place, it was almost perfect, but even still Dean felt like a vagabond. Putting Baby in drive he made his way down the road a little ways back to where he’d started, Bobby no longer sitting on the porch, but he was sure he could hear him and Ellen laughing just off in the distance as he killed the engine. 

Everyone had their place, but Dean. Dean didn’t have a home or a long lost love waiting for him, and he felt something he thought he wasn’t supposed to ever feel again in Heaven. He felt lonely. 

“Hey Dean,” Jack’s voice cut into the fog of his self pity, and Dean spun in the driver's seat to find Jack smiling at him in the back, a smile breaking over Dean’s weather beaten features, revealing the eye crinkles deep in his sun kissed skin that Jack had missed seeing, and didn’t get to see nearly enough while they were both on Earth.

“Jack! You’ve done a great job man! This place is everything anyone could dream of, you and Cas really outdid yourselves.” 

Dean’s gaze locked with the boy in life he’d hated almost to the point of death, and all he could find now was utter and complete peace staring back at him, and he wondered if he would get to the place where he could feel the same peace everyone else seemed to feel.

“Dean, glad you finally made it,” Jack said, leaning forward in the seat and looking around to the road and pointing for Dean to drive up the gravel path hidden in the trees. Dean did so without question, putting his beloved Baby in drive, and pushing onward until a little cabin tucked away in the hallow appeared just in sight. You were sitting on the porch, watching, as if you were waiting for him, and as he turned to Jack in confusion Jack just smiled as he once did when he tried to give Dean his first Christmas present, only more deep and with more pride. 

“I don’t remember her,” Dean murmured, turning back to look at you as you were  standing up slowly and making your way to lean against the rough cut railing of the porch, eyes tracing over Dean’s cars almost fondly. 

“That’s because you never got to meet her while you were alive. She was stolen from you Dean, long before you ever got the chance to find true happiness.” 

Dean’s face contorted with confusion, but Jack simply placed his fingers to Dean’s forehead lightly, showing him all the things that could have been, and should have been, but never were, just like he did to you. When Jack was done, one giant tear rolled down Dean's face as he uttered the only thing he could have thought would possibly have been able to take something so precious away from him, so willingly. “Chuck.” 

Jack nodded  and looked back at you where you were waiting for Dean to finally get out of the car. 

“This, Dean, this is the Heaven you deserve. This is home. This is peace. You did good Dean, and now it’s time for you to have everything without any terms or conditions.”

Dean’s eyes traced over your features and his heart swelled in his chest. He could feel it, the magnetic pull, the piece of him that was always missing beckoning to him to come home and lay his weary soul to rest. “Y/N,” he murmured before looking back at Jack. “How do I know her name?” he asked. Jack just smiled, looking into Dean’s eyes knowingly.

“Go home Dean, she’s been waiting for you for a long time.” With that Jack disappeared, leaving Dean alone in the car. 

Slowly, Dean pushed the door open, and his eyes met yours as a smile spread across your face. He was perfect. He was everything you had missed and didn’t know you needed. He completed you.

You were the deepest piece of his soul that he had always missed, you were the reason his heart was beating now, and had always been the reason he got up and fought every day to get to the rest that he had found now. You were home, his home. 

Dean placed a large hand to the side of your face as his arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you close to him, and brushed your hair away from your face. His green eyes bore into your own with more emotion and love than you had ever felt in your life. There was no darkness there. There was no hurt, or self loathing, there was no weight of the world, there was no more fight and heartache. There was nothing but love and resounding peace that would last for the ages. 

“I’m sorry I took so long, sweetheart,” Dean said, his lips brushing yours as you melted into his hold, humming at the warmth of his breath against your skin. 

“S’Okay Dean,” you tell him, wrapping your arms around his broad shoulders as the two of you just held each other there in your little piece of Heaven. You finally had all you’d ever need. Dean had you, and your warrior was finally home.

Forever Tags: 

@deandreamernp​

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Jensen and Dean’s Babes

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@supernatural-bellawinchester​

#dean winchester x reader #dean winchester x you #dean winchester #dean x reader #dean x you #dean winchester fanfic #dean winchester fanfiction #spn fanfiction #spn fanfic #spn one shot #dean winchester one shot #jensen ackles #jawritter #30 minutes in heaven #x reader inserts

[jinxofthecipher]

Headcanon/Scene, Part 1: 

When Deidara was first told that Tobi was to be his new official partner, he was, of course, appalled. They wanted him to be paired with such an artless weakling?? It was ludacrious! If anyone else had dared suggest such a thing . . . well they’d be missing a few limbs and knowing what true art was; but it came from Pain-sama himself and he was rather hard to say ‘no’ too. 

So the blonde accepted, although it came with a good deal of grumbling that were all ignored. Course the complaining didn’t stop there, it followed Deidara all the way to his meeting with Kakuzu who was to stitch the artist’s arms back on.

“I don’t get it,” he huffed as Kakuzu picked up an arm and positioned it below Deidara’s stump of an elbow, “why is he even in the organization!? He’s useless and annoying as hell, hm.”

The older shinobi sighed, some of his tendrils slithering out and Deidara didn’t wince as it stabbed through his skin, reattatching one pull at a time. “Not as annoying as Hidan.”

“Hey!! You fucker! I’m literally in the next room over!!”

“Just stating facts, you egotistical brat.”

Rolling his eyes, Deidara continued, “yeah, Hidan’s annoying “fuck you blondie!!” but at least he’s competent. Tobi’s not.”

Left arm thoroughly stitched, Kakuzu gave a firm squeeze around the stitches, making sure it was completely attatched. Pleased, he went to work on the next. “Pain-sama wouldn’t make a mistake. He picked Tobi for a reason we’re not aware of yet, and may never know. It was inevitable either way, given Tobi has been hanging around since before I joined.”

“See! You said it yourself Kakuzu! ‘He doesn’t make mistakes!’ So-”

“You were picked by chance, Hidan. Everyone else was carefully chosen. Now: Shut. Up. Or I’ll kill you.”

A loud groan follows his threat, “yeah, yeah, whatever, old man.” Deidara raises an eyebrow at the fond tone.

“And if he gets too annoying, Deidara, then you can always kill him,” the older shinobi adds as the arm is sewn back on just as efficiently as the last.

That has the artist snorting, shaking his head with a grin, “already ahead of you on that. Gotta test his abilities some way or another and if he can’t survive that . . . well, I’ll be needing a new partner again.” He looks down at his newly attatched arms, wiggling the fingers. The mouths on his palms open. On command one smiles and the other’s tongue pokes out to lick at the lips, “Nice work, Kakuzu. They’re good as new!”

Kakuzu hums, “Just don’t go too crazy right out the gate. They’re too new. You might end up ripping 'em off and if either gets too ruined it’ll take much longer.”

“Yeah, ‘be careful, don’t go nuts,’ got it.” He hops off the table, “I’ll be careful. Good luck with the partner . . .” He eyes the open doorway were he can hear the jashinist grumbling, “Give up on killing him yet?”

Kakuzu shrugs, “I’ll keep him.”

“HA! Knew you liked me, Kuzu!!”

The older shinobi only sighs and Deidara can’t help the smile he gets as he leaves. Those two somehow found even ground but his partner? Nah. No way.

He’s sure that Tobi isn’t all that strong, even if Pain-sama seeminly doesn’t make mistakes. And apparently Tobi’s been around the organization for a long time now (Deidara knew well enough that Kakuzu had been picked very early on so for Tobi to have been there before him . . . something to note, that’s for sure) however he hadn’t ever been chosen. Pain-sama had come and chosen Deidara well before accepting Tobi officially in. That spoke louder then anything. 

Tobi had been a last resort. But why? If the Akatsuki only accepted S-rank shinobi, why wait so long to recruit Tobi if he apparently was s-ranked? It just didn’t add up. 

Course, then they trained and Deidara was even more confused. He had hit the idiot with everything he had (not his Ace, but still) and Tobi had skipped away from the smoking craters like a child on Christmas. Just . . . how?? Deidara didn’t get it, what the hell was he? At the end of the battle he had flown down, irked and angry.

“You have to tell me what your jutsu it, Tobi! We can’t work together if we don’t know the in’s and out’s of each other’s abilities!”

“But senpai, all it is is dodging! I’m veryyyyy slippery~” He had giggled, placing a hand over the bottom of his mask, as if to cover his giggles.

“That doesn’t answer any of my questions!”

And Tobi never answered any of them. And it only lead Deidara to be more and more suspicious. An idiot with capabilities of dodging any attack? Why. Wasn’t. He. Picked. Before. Now? The question always seemed to come up, more so when Tobi was being an idiot which was always. True, he wasn’t vastly intelligent or even all that cruel, hell there were times that Deidara was sure Tobi didn’t have an evil bone in his body. But that only brought up more questions that ran into more walls then answers. It got to the point where it would be easier to believe that Tobi was related somehow to Pain-sama and was waved in out of pity then anything else. That obviously wasn’t the answer but still.

Whether he had answers or not, Deidara kept an eye on him and while at first he hated doing so (the idiot was annoying as hell, just as he’d predicted), it became easier and easier and they naturally fell into step with one another. So easily that Deidara found himself surprised one day when Tobi did something annoying and he responed with his usual annoyance but found himself feeling . . . fond? (of course Deidara still whole-heartedly disagrees whenever Hidan brings any of it up. They’re NOT on the same page and he DOESN’T like when Tobi asks for a random hug during missions or when he asks for art demonstrations!).  But either way, he’ll continue to be wary because as easy as it is to believe Tobi’s a moron, Deidara knows better to underestimate him  even if he sometimes forgets cause Tobi’s eagerly listening to his art rants or has the artist actually laughing to the point of tears.

Part 2: https://jinxofthecipher.tumblr.com/post/639612985196920832/scene-part-2-it-all-starts-with-a-small-box-of

#Another headcanon/scene! #I'm starting to think these are all apart of an Akatsuki story I'll never write (mainly cause I have SO many stories to do lol) #Deidara's fun to write for. I know I say that for every character but his outlook is interesting to dig into #Naruto #Naruto Shippuden #Akatsuki #Deidara #Tobi #Obito #Obito Uchiha #Uchiha #Kakuzu #Hidan #KakuHida #HidaKaku #it's slight but it's there KakuHida/HidaKaku #TobiDei #ObiDei #Tobi x Deidara #Obito x Deidara #Obito Uchiha x Deidara #Pain #Pein #Nagato #Pain-sama #(Yes I spell Pain not as Pein because it was spelled Pain in the manga and I've always written it that way.) #Deidara's secretly a softie later on but he'll never admit it #Hidan knows. He knows a fellow softie when he sees 'em

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

from an anon, about parents and school

(it's just long, that's why it's under a break XD)

here's my proposition: make parents understand that not every child should conform to whatever traditional career paths that exist. as an asian, i could feel the pressure to take science like a fucking boulder on my body. i have to rant a bit.

i am the younger sibling, my brother is two years elder to me. i was never instilled any curiosity in anything science related, i was kinda left all by myself lol. my brother tho, maybe because he was older or because he was a guy (yeah LMFAO), was encouraged AND involved in a LOT of coding, mechanix (its a construct-ur-own-stuff thing).

i guess i never really noticed until i was leaving middle school, that i was not as smart as him, and would probably never be. but i had other strengths he didnt have. i love writing, im pretty good at it. i am analytical and subejctive, i like thinking and making conclusions about things. i mean i guess i've figured out what i could be better at, right? but the problem?

its that my parents dont see it. its as if they dont know me or they DO know me and are just forcing the things they need onto me. it feels selfish of them to completely forgo my actual strengths. like YES OK i UNDERSTAND i can never be as smart as my brother, but u dont have to pretend like i can. because pretending that i can achieve whatever he has, is just going to affect YOU. because i have accepted long ago that some things arent for me.

they think i dont want to put effort into anything i do. that im lazy and want the easy way out. god, every time they say this i want to honestly show them that its the things IM interested in, where i put in the work. its so belittling.

ive written articles abt bts, their music, about how carl jungs theory of archetypes and i occasionally ask a lot of questions about the world to you (hi lol). i just dont get why they want me to waste energy on something im clearly uninterested in.

short answer, point to BTS and say, "They're Asian, they make tons of money. Leave me alone."

just kidding XD

If I'm being serious, I don't think they will change their mind. They will continue to force their ideals onto you, because they believe in certain career paths had assured success and that is what they are after. They either want you to make a certain amount of money, have a certain status in life, or simply know that you can obtain a stable job. To be honest, these are not really traditional career paths at all if you think about it. Becoming a doctor takes many, many years and it is hard ass work. Parents just make it seem as if these are the only jobs available to you, even if you know it's not true.

Men vs women in Asian countries, well, I feel everyone knows this, but many Asian parents born in their respective countries put more effort into their sons than daughters. Firstborn son? He probably walks on water to them XD

I understand what you mean when you say your parents do not understand. This might sound egotistical (it does now that I'm writing it, I am very sorry) but I was the one in my family who got the best grades. None of my siblings got better grades than me (basically I had a 4.0 from middle school to university), and do you think with all that I would be immune?

Nope.

I am good at the sciences and I am good at the humanities as well. I had an interest in reading, writing, and drawing. Reading fiction, I could pass it off to educate myself. Writing? I could pass it off as something for school. But drawing?

Woo, boy.

This was a constant fight. I do not back down (a rebel, wcyd) and I drew and it would get ripped apart. I drew and it would get torn up and thrown away. I drew and and would be beaten, yelled at, constantly belittled for my interest in it even though I was good at the sciences and math. To my mom (my dad doesn't count, he had zero interest in parenting) - if she did not think it was going to make money in the future, it was useless. If I could not spin it into profit, I should not be doing it (very fun childhood I had, yes). The most ironic thing is, after I became an adult, she suggested I start drawing again and sell it to make money.

Hello?

You literally forced me to stop drawing because you constantly connected it with negativity???

(not now, I have since stopped talking to her and started drawing again and it is purely for myself, not to show anyone else, I do not even post it on social media or show anyone irl)

Not saying your parents will act like mine, btw, only sharing my experience.

The idea that you'll never be as smart as your brother? That's bullshit lol. That's like saying intelligence is only valuable if it's science or math, which, as you know, is not true. You are you. He is himself. It is not you cannot do those things. It is that those things are not what you want to focus on. You have a limited amount of time in this life and you have chosen the things you want to delve into and explore.

You don't have to be good at everything. Everything is just not good enough for you.

I am of the mindset that you should try and learn everything you can about this world. I love learning, personally. I think knowing everything I know, from the humanities to the sciences, enriches my life and gives me a broader perspective.

But I totally understand how you feel, because being pushed into something makes you end up hating it. Parents push their kids to learn this or that and kids end up resenting schoolwork because it doesn't feel like something they wanna do anymore. It's just adults yapping in their ears and it feels pointless. Grades aren't everything. You think anyone cares that I aced Physics with Calculus I and II as an adult? LMAO, no one gives a shit. You passed, good enough XD

Here's how I think you should treat school. It's not the content that matters. It's you understanding how you learn each subject. Every subject is different and how you learn them is different. It is not because you are bad at the subject, it is because you haven't figured out the best learning style for you. Teachers have to teach a mass of students and, yes, I understand this seems very tedious to have to "teach yourself".

The skill in learning to learn becomes so, so valuable as an adult. It is how you maintain interest in things, how you develop new interests, and how will come to find meaning (in whatever you want to focus on finding meaning for). I'm not saying that you will be able to find your perfect learning style in every subject, but I am encouraging you to simply see it in that light.

And, you might find certain things to be not that important to you, in which case, just pass the class, it's totally fine if it's not going to help you for the career path you're going for XD Nobody asks me about the themes of William Shakespeare's "Romeo and Juliet" (tbh, a pair of overdramatic loons) or how I feel about Sigmund Freud (actually a twat, but that's neither here nor there).

Let them talk. That one that walks your path is you. Focus on what you want to focus on. They are set in their ways and they way to show them there are different paths is to walk them.

[full-of-roman-angst-trash]

Where Did You Go?

This fanfic is dedicated to @moxy--sanders101! Congrats on 1k!!! You definitely deserve it!

Prompt by @transformationloveb

Orginal pompt

TW: Small Unsympathetic Virgil, Roman Angst, Cursing, Very Small Hint of Self Deprecation (Very easy to miss but added it just in case)

Pairings: Familial Creativity Twins (Don’t tag as R*mR*m) Platonic Roceit, Platonic Demus/Dukeciet

~~~~~~~~~

“Loooogggaannn!!! I’m starving!!!” I whine loudly, staring at Logan from my spot on the couch.

A groan responds to my whine.

“Remus shut the fuck up! I’m trying to follow this stupid recipe! If you’re actually starving, then stop being annoying and let me concentrate!”

Daddy dearest frowns a bit, “Logie, language!”

Another groan escapes the Nerdy Wolverine’s mouth, “Sorry, Patton.”

“It’s fine, Logie. Just take a deep breath; If you want, I can try and help you with supper.”

Logan takes a deep breath before sighing and putting the knife that he was using to try and cut some vegetables with, down. 

“There really isn’t a need. No matter what we do, the outcome won’t come out well.”

Virgin, who was sitting on the counter, rolls his eyes, “Geez, try having some faith, teach.” 

“Why should I have ‘faith’? In the past month that Roman has refused to leave his room. Any food that we have attempted to make has been unsatisfactory. I am merely basing my hypothesis on past data.”

"I was just trying to be optimistic...." The emo mumbles in response, shrinking into his hoodie. 

"Awwe Kiddo," Daddy goes over to Virgin and hugs him, "It's okay."

Four-eyes sighs, "My deepest apologies if I hurt your feeling Virgil, that was not my intention. I am merely just frustrated with our current predicament."

"Remus, can you try to convince Ro to come out out of his room again? Please?" The Old Man glances at me.

I throw myself off the couch and onto the floor. 

"I've tried, but Little Miss Tinkerbell refuses to come out until Double D over here leaves," I inform him.

Anxiety rolls his eyes and groans, “Oh my god! Can he just stop being so dramatic!? He’s such a crybaby! He’s literally hurting us just because Deceit made a snarky remark at him! Which was his fault since Deceit was defending himself from Roman’s bullying!”

His words ring in my ears and make a seething rage spread throughout my body, I was just about to defend my brother, but someone beats me to it. 

“Shut the fuck up, Anxiety,” The coldness and anger in Jan’s voice makes a shiver run through all of our spines. 

Anxiety turns to DeeDee with an annoyed and offended expression on his face.

“Excuse me!? I am literally defending you, and you tell me to shut up!?” Virgil glares at Janus.  

“Well, last time I checked, I didn’t ask you to defend me, now did I?” He stands up and starts making his way to our once ally, “Also, you weren’t there for that episode; you only know Patton’s side of the story. So you are in no position to speak about an issue you know barely know anything about.”

He stops right in front of Par-Anxiety and puts a hand on his shoulder passive-aggressively.

He smiles, yet it was an unsettling and scary smile, “You haven’t tried seeing things from his perspective or tried to be sympathetic and tried to understand why he reacted like that. On top of that, you have no right to declare his rebuttal as bullying.”

Anxiety swallows and slaps Jan’s hand away, “W-whatever...” He takes a step back, “I don’t understand why you’re defending that asshole!”

“CALL MY BROTHER ONE MORE NAME I DARE YOU!!!” I summon my morning star and point it at Anxiety, unable to hold my anger any longer.

The coward squeals and takes another step back, not responding.

I take a deep breath and put my morning star away before starting to walk away, “I’m going to talk to my brother.”

“Wait,” Janus grabs my wrist and stops me from going further, “Can I come with you, please? I wanna try and apologize to him...”

I know that Janus is the last person Ro wants to see, but I can’t really say no to Dee. I know Dee really regrets what he did, and well, I want Ro and Dee to get along.

I sigh softly, “Fine, but if he wants you to leave, please do.”

He nods, “Aright, that’s fine,” He lets go of my wrist and follows me to Roman’s room.

We get to Roman’s room, and I knock on the door softly, “Ro, it’s me, Rem. Can you please let me in?

It takes a while for me to get a response, but I know I would.

“A-are you alone....?” His voice is just barely loud enough for me to hear it.

I glance at Double D, noting his shocked expression, probably from him hearing Roman respond.

“No, I’m not,” I turn back to the door.

This time the wait for a response is much longer, “W-Who’s with you...?

I take a small deep breath, “Janus...”

Silence. That’s all that comes back at me. Suddenly though, the door opens and Roman -with messy, tangled hair, a plain black shirt and shorts, puffy red eyes and nose- looks at us.  

“C-Come in.....” 

He moves to let us in. We walk in, and I immediately notice the state of his room; All the posters he had up were ripped clean off, the fairy lights that were hanged on the wall were gone, plain white sheets replaced his rose bed sheets, and his closet wall that he had hand-painted designs into was repainted white. 

I bite my lip and try not to get upset at seeing my brother’s past confident and fiery love for his passions gone. I notice that Jan is looking down, and it was evident that he was also holding back his emotions. I hear Roman close the door; he walks over to his bed and sits down.

He avoids looking at us, “S-So, w-why are you guys h-here....?” 

I sit on the floor, Jan hesitantly sitting next to me, “Well, I think someone has to  tell you a few things.”

I turn to DeeDee and give him an encouraging smile. Roman stays quiet, just waiting for one of us to continue speaking.

Dee takes a deep breath, “Look, Roman...” He starts quietly, “I’m so so sorry... I know what I said wasn’t right, and it was way too far... There was a line, and I definitely crossed it... I’m sorry.”

His words seem to take a while for them to reach Roman; for a while, the room falls silent. 

“I’m sorry too,” Ro finally looks at us, his voice hushed, “For everything I’ve ever done to both of you... I wrongfully judged you guys and stereotyped y’all... Then I had the audacity to insult and make fun of you guys... So, I’m truly sorry...”

Dee smiles softly, “How about we start over?”

“Yeah,” A small smile creeps its way to Roman’s face, “I’d like that.”

“Okay, sorry to interrupt you guys’ moment,” I loudly interject, not really all that sorry, “But, dude, I’m starving, and we have to fix your room, it looks disgusting right now!”

The Disney whore lightheartedly rolls his eyes, “First of all, fine, we can fix my room later. And second of all, can’t you make your own food? I mean you literally eat deodorant.” 

I whine loudly, “You usually make my deodorant, though! You’re the only one that can cook anything good, stupid!” 

“Remus is, for once, correct Roman,” Janus butts in, completely ignoring my offended gasp, “We’ve tried to figure out how to cook, but sadly we’ve had no real success.”

 Mr.Depresso sighs and gets up, “Fine, I guess I can cook dinner again.”

I excitedly stand up, (almost accidentally slipping and crushing Jan) “Yay! Thanks, Hoe Bag!” 

He smacks me on the arm, “Dumb bitch,” He helps JD up.

“While this isn’t quite amusing, stop calling each other names. Also, thank you, Roman.” 

Prince crybaby huffs, “No problem and fine, I yield.”

“Well, I don’t! Now let’s go bitches!” I grab both of their hands and start running out of the room. 

They both follow without bothering to struggle. Once we get to the living room, I let go of their hands, pushing Roman forward slightly. 

“I got the dumbass!”

Everyone's attention turns to us.

Roman regains his balance from my shove and clears his throat awkwardly, going back to avoiding eye contact.

Suddenly, I scoff cuts through the silence, “Oh great, The egotistical prick is back.”

I immediately recognize the voice, and when I notice Roman flinch, all my anger from earlier came back.

“Stop Anxiety. May I remind you that he’s being nice enough to cook dinner for us. Something we don’t deserve after ignoring him and pushing him aside for so long,” Janie quickly responded.

I smirk, “Exactly! So, shut up bitch!”

Before he or any other side can say anything, I grab Janus’ and Roman’s hand and drag them to the kitchen.

As we’re walking there, I hear a small whisper.

“Thank you, guys. You two are the best.”

~~~~~~~~~

Writing Taglist

@just-violet-flowers @itriedandimtired @lilyrockerlove @random-fander

#sanders sides fic #roman angst #ts roman #ts patton #ts logan #ts janus #ts remus #ts virgil #sympathetic remus #sympathetic dark sides #sympathetic deceit #unsympathetic virgil #after pof #creativitwins #platonic roceit #platonic demus #platonic dukeceit #my writing

[ghoulishhusband]

I just realized I can actually talk here. Like this is my account fuck u

Fucking uhhhhhh, hi ig lemme ramble abt my God ocs yea?

Ignore this part if you don't wanna hear (likely) unedited rambles lol it doesn't matter

CW: neglect/abuse, assholery/narcissism, manipulation, tread lightly!

read the under cut owo

Also don't steal my art I'll fucking?? Fight you????

So

I have three main gods that I wanna talk abt especially bc they've been on my mind lately.. Less get it, side notes are in (parentheses) and are bolded cause I have perception issues whoo I don't want it to jumble together is my point lol

First up is my asshole,

Giodine

they/them (preferred)

god/godself (i like pronouns that fit my characters, so I'm giving a bunch away for one night only at--)

ID : Giodine is colored with gold-ish yellow skin and ginger hair. Their eyes are a muted purple and they have tiny eyebrows. Their lips are a muted brown and are full looking, their nose is sharp and points down. They have wings for ears and is wearing a blazer with a long-sleeved, collared shirt underneath it. The background is beige with a yellow square and a dark purple square partially encompassing it. It is signed GH (for ghoulish husband), Spork, 21.

(lemme know if that helps at all! I'm sure I can do better so lemme know!)

If they look weird here it's bc I accidentally made their face too long but believe it or not this is in fact just a doodle Ik I'm so fuckin talented babes.

Anyways, they're basically the first God to ever exist on my version of earth (though even that is fickle rn, world-building is hard unless I hyper-focus on it, and haha Guess What I Haven't Been Thinking About) and they're very egotistical and selfish. As I'll probably yap about later is how they're manipulative as well, especially to another God I'll mention, and very neglectful to the other... other one.

Their partner(professionally), or fiend as they call him, is sam who for the first few eons was, unsurprisingly, absolutely terrible to him. A few tender moments are few and far in between in what could only be described as a completely rancid relationship. I'll describe giodine's side and in sam's lil ramble, I'll describe his :]

I have to explain this because it's a big part of the lore and how they can't work together, even when one of them is very much near The Void (technical death for gods) BUT basically, with Sam, giodine created purgatory. The issue here is that they basically seduced sam into doing it. Well, even if they hadn't, sam was in lesbians(happy pride month lmao) with giodine and would've done it anyway. But the ISSUE is that with the creation of purgatory came complications. See, my gods have to take time to develop into their power, and considering giodine was first and sam was around 666th.. you see the issue. Sam wasn't into his complete power yet and thus lost a giant part of it that went into purg.

See, giodine saw no problem with this (until much later, they do get a VERY SLOW BURN redemption arc cause this ain't even the worst of it), they got what they were aching for out of them and thusly had no need for..sam. They laid him in the spot where she was made (fwi it isn't inherently sexual, it can be, but literally, they just merged together-- taking bits and pieces of each other (which sam did not have enough of) and earth and light yadda, yadda I'll post the story I wrote for that later if I'm up to it) and left him there in the grass.

Again, they saw no problem with that, the deed was done, they didn't care anymore. A common issue in their qualms, sam and Giodine. They did find an issue in Sam finding an issue in the lack of aftercare, which resorted to any message going to or coming from sam going straight to his assistant and going back through them for a couple of thousand years. They found that infuriating-- how could he not face them over something so small! and for years?! it was ridiculous. After forcing a face-to-face meeting, a heated proclaim of hurt from sam, and a bitter agreement to meet up every now and again, they got what they wanted from him. Again. It was a business after all, there was no point in making it harder than it needed to be. 

Giodine doesn't necessarily like boundaries and tends to overstep sam's frequently. They also don't like his reaction to his boundaries being long jumped over, which thusly ends up in disgruntled messages being sent back and forth between them and his assistant for a month or three. It slowly gets through to them, but they tend to say some stupid shit and if they want sam to stay, they have to try and avoid mentioning how "overly sensitive" he is to something that happened eons ago.

(quick mention, there isn't like. time. here. so in all honesty, giodine probably counted earth days instead of Heaven 'days' to get that) Soon into their arrangements to meet, they seem to get on at least tolerable terms, obviously, a few meetings where neither of them feels like going apeshit and taking proper shapeless (or in sams case, he's got a newfound form for ANGER OO just for giodine 🤗) forms isn't going to fix a grudge that has yet to be apologized for by the way. But it's a start to a very long process down the road. Tolerance.

Giodine as an entity is very fickle and rude and demanding. They tend to have a short temper that no one else is allowed to have or comment on-- They were the first therefore they were the most important!

This is very obviously an issue. But it's mostly directed to purgatory. Almost all of their seething rage is pointed towards the poor entity, she's barely been alive yet and they already seem to hate her for things she doesn't know how to do. Honestly, I don't think Purg will ever fully forgive them for the unnecessary abuse of her character, but just as Sam and Giodine get on better terms, they had barely just begun fixing the hole in their relationship. As of now, Sam/Giodine don't have any minor plot points with purgatory other than the major one so I don't have a lot to say about their relationship right now. Maybe one day.

I'd go into details, seriously, but I just wanna ramble about their relationships with each other and their impact on each other's existence. Hope you don't mind a few secrets 😉

But, now, it's time for a new God, one I think most people take a liking to...

Sam (Samuel)

He/him

ID: Sam is surrounded by clouds in the light blue, fading to a darker blue sky and the yellow sun. His horns are a darker beige, which is being highlighted by the sun shining down on him, he also has pointed ears. His skin is red which is very prominent in the sun. His eyes are completely yellow, his hair, beard and mustache are also black. He has an orange scar crawling up to his Adams apple. His wings are a darker grey which is also being highlighted by the sun. His nails are painted black and his hand is holding up the black fabric barely covering his shoulders. Around the painting is a gold and red shaded frame with swirls complimenting each side and a crystal at the bottom of it. It is lightly signed GH, for ghoulish husband.

Sam, Sam, Samuel.

If you don't realize right away, Sam is basically Satan, he's the ruler of hell

Like how giodine was the first to appear on earth, as mentioned before sam was 666th for funnie reasons. Sam was made from bugs, dried blood, and sunlight which sounds pretty gross, but he's far from it. He's a silly, yet neat, guy. He wears Hawaiian shirts and khakis (not around giodine lmao) for cryin' out loud! how bad of a person can he be? Apparently to giodine (for a while obviously) he was the most retched entity to exist. This very much hurt him considering the amount of fake care they showed him before. With a mixture of confusing feelings (which wasn't supposed to be a thing but Univerce went "lmao you'll be fine" and left... short explanation, Univerce is the Universe and is the entity who simply builds these planets and gods that'll appear there and leave them to their own devices, xyr not extremely important in this story. Nor would they care.) and feeling used, he decided that no he wasn't going to take that.

If there is one thing Sam knows how to do is to self preserve himself, even if that means getting passive-aggressive notes sent to him every once in a while. While this period, Sam was surprisingly the least productive (unfortunately giodine knew this and eventually mentioned it in one of their meetings which made him hide away cause like hell giodine was going to be critical of /him/) but he managed. It wasn't terrible, but unfortunately, Sam being able to talk it out with someone who does practically the same work as he does and gets newer, more helpful ideas was better in the long run.

Unsurprisingly, Sam was the first to initiate the healing of his and giodine's relationship but it wasn't reciprocated. Who would've figured, aye? Giodine kept pushing it back onto him and ignoring any progress that could've been made before. Which was frustrating.

The painting above was 'painted' by giodine, which is sorta where their relationship gets somewhat on an understanding of each other. Giodine gets to take a deep long look into who Sam is and tries to express it but it never fit him, it makes them realize that they never really-- truly got to know him. And all it does for Sam is make him even more confused about his place in giodine’s mind. He figured it's another fluke to get him to do something, so he ends up distancing himself when they start actually reciprocating his friendship advancements.

Suddenly, like a flash, Sam was forced to stay with giodine which is where the majority. I'll explain.

Sam...isn't actually the ruler of hell. Anymore, anyways depending on the timeline. His and purgatory's relationship has always been complicated, she always avoided him, and when they talked she always seemed scared of him. So in the end, they've never been close. Distant. Sam always wanted to talk to her, he made her, but if she didn't want to talk to him he wouldn't force it. But imagine his surprise as Purg singlehandedly took over hell in a hazed frenzy.

And not only that, had a personal vendetta against him!

Well, that would be the only explanation to Sam considering how he ended up broken and barely 'alive' at the hands of her. Horns broken and in tatters, pain and almost obliterated it felt like a hate crime. He didn't know what to do when he made it to the office, Purgatory was creating chaos outside his door and barely being able to breathe he felt like it was the end. So he called giodine. 

Purgatory

She/her

ID: Purgatory is surrounded by flowers that are dark grey and white. The light fades down into a dark green. The light shines down on top of her straight, white hair that has yellow flowers tucked into it.  Her skin is a dark brown and has a orange-ish yellow scar on her shoulder trailing up to her neck. Her skin is also highlighted by the sun. In one of her eyes, her sclera is black with an orangey, glowing iris. As for the other eye it it has a white sclera and the same, glowing orange iris. She has wings for ears, one dark grey and one white along with beige horns. She has a white fabric covering her chest. The frame is gold with white accents, but also has vines and moss crawling up the side. 

(may have goofed a bit and forgot to color the sclera of her other eye white but ignore that pls)

Purgatory was made by Sam and Giodine, but to her it felt like a mistake. Why make someone that you’re going to be terrible to, she believed. Giodine seemed to hate her and eventually made her section almost obsolete because she simply wasn’t able to keep up with the backlog that she wasn’t taught to deal with. Not only that, she didn’t have any help with any of it, it was almost like she was expected to just do it on her own. Until Death came along to help, but that’s not what we’re going to be talking about right now. 

And also, Purgatory is Purgatory yadda, yadda, I wont insult your intelligence.

Giodine’s thought process (other than wanting to be Real Close to Sam and once that thought filtered out, promptly ignored it) was that all the extras that don’t fit in either category of their thought of good and evil they’d go to her. (doesn’t matter cause in Sam's system it filters through ‘levels of assholery’ and depending on how bad you are you either just vibe in the upper city under rule of capitalism and possibly many under paying jobs or being actually tortured for his amusement if you’re just evil. Morally grey. Anyway, it could work p well in heaven if giodine wasn’t such a damn stickler.) But in the end, every day, less and less people ended up in purgatory, leaving her with barely any people and more verbal abuse from giodine who ‘HAS to take them or they would be more dead than they already are’. You see the pain she has to go through, right? 

~Idea section, this is probably not canon anyways so dont take it serious~ 

My thought is that another oc (BA, you may have heard of him idk) takes over simply because Purg took multiple hims from alternative timelines (which isn’t allowed but what’re they gonna do, undead a dead clown? multiple times from multiple timelines???)) because she adored him and they figured ‘well we gotta redo purgatory may as well do it like this’ and make him a demi-dead-god. i think thats a cool idea right? anyhoo

~Idea section over uwu~

Purgatory overall is a fairly timid character, she doesn’t like conflict, is easily overwhelmed, and generally keeps to herself. She doesn’t see the point in being in any drama if she’s just going to be yelled at and scolded even if it’s not about her. The only way i could describe her taking over hell is this: 

She was tired. She was angry and after feeling like nothing was in control or in her hands, she snapped. Why doesn’t she get anything or get to be ‘all powerful’ but they do? She knew if she took on Giodine she’d likely get thrown to the void, but sam? He felt fair game. Considering her fear of both of these gods, she planned and got her courage up to take him over. She had considered negotiations but in the end, she ended up going into a haze and ruining everything in sight. She was more powerful than she thought and once she started, she didn't stop until Death restrained her and Sam was already in pieces at God’s doorstep. 

The aftermath was fuzzy for her and for everyone really. Godine was planning a take back hell while actually worrying for sam, sam was planning for a retirement, and she was being consoled while trying to get in contact with sam to apologize. Giodine wouldn’t dare let her talk to him, until she just showed up in their office. She didn’t have a problem with Sam, honest, she just was going to take shit over, but it got out of control. 

Spoiler, Sam took her apology and they actually became.. somewhat closer after reaching an understanding. 

I wanna say that giodine took them being okay and sam retiring as good as sam did about purg running hell, but they didn’t. Giodine and purgatory actually barely got along in the first place, and only begun ‘working’ on their bitterness toward each other because they both had sam to encourage it. I can’t say for certain if they’ll get better, as theyre both undying and have time, but I’ll just say for now its uncertain. 

Also, Death is Purgatory’s girlfriend after all of that lmao.

And.. yeah, i hope this makes sense and that you like my drawings and ramblings about my lil story in my head, i guess this is my way to develop it without just keeping it to myself cause god forbid i keep things to myself hshsh. If you made it to the end, thank you for taking the time to read and attempting to process everything, and even if you didnt read and just looked to look at my art thank you to!!

I may post some art over on @ghoulishhusbandart cause.. it was my art account before i completely forgot about it but i might reboot it! But if you wan art NEOWWW follow me on insta (ik cringe lmaoo) by the same name as this account @ghoulishhusband​ or just click that insta link! also ignore the fact that giodine is the only one without a portrait, maybe I’ll replace it the next time i draw but im graduating on monday and my dad’s coming TOMORROW?? so i won’t have too much time to do it... but i hope you like my art anyways :]

ok!! ty!! ily!!

#ghoulishrambles #ghoulishsporkocs #man this is weird lmaoooooo #THE CUT DIDNT CUT IM SORRY #Man I should've edited this before ppl could see it I'm so sorry if it's a mess shshhs #I keep adding tags bc I have more to say but I wanna pin this but I don't wanna remove that Palestine post just for my ramble so #I'll just reblog it every once in a while

[starkeristheendgame]

Peter tattooed Tony's name on his ass after a drunken night on his 18th birthday. And then Tony found out.

I had so many ideas for this and I fucking loved this prompt. Honestly Anon, thank you so much for the burst of inspiration! I absolutely love this concept and spent like two-hours just staring into space and internally fic-writing 😂

Its not exactly a ‘drunken night tattoo’ AU, but that’s because any respectable tattoo shop will not tattoo you if you’re drunk, or if you’ve consumed alcohol within the last 12 hours. So in respect of the professionals and in the interest of promoting safety, this is a slightly different base!

TW: Very light D/s Dynamic | Slight possessive behaviour | Under-negotiated (but consensual)

Peter couldn’t even blame being drunk. He wished he could; really. People did stupid things when drunk. It seemed to be an immediate write-off excuse for anything, instantly accepted as a valid reason for any stupid decisions.

Peter had been completely and utterly, stone-cold sober at every point in this process. He’d been sober when he’d scanned one of Tony’s signatures onto his phone. Sober when he’d booked the consultation with InkSpren Tattoo. Sober when he’d walked into the studio a week later in a pair of MJ’s velvet shorts.

He wasn’t entirely nervous. Pain didn’t really scare him as much as he supposed it used to. Especially not pain from a set of tiny, teeny needles. He’d gone with MJ for her first tattoo, and she’d taken it pretty well. Well enough that somewhere around the first hour, she’d begun to snore.

His tattoo artist was named Dave. That was comforting. Dave sounded like a nice name. Normal. Friendly. Guy-Next-Door-Dave.

Peter faltered in the doorway.

Dave was a 6″1 male with a beard and more tattoos than Peter thought possible to fit on one man. He was in the process of sapping on a pair of gloves, and eyed Peter critically when he noticed him lingering in the doorway, before motioning for Peter to join him.

“Lay down on your front. Arch your spine a little. You’re gonna have to pull those down under the cheek,” he instructed, reaching into a small tub to pull out some sanitary wipes. Peter tried not to feel embarrassed as he did as told, crawling up onto the bed and settling comfortably, before he squirmed, tugging down his shorts and his boxers both.

The wipe was cold and Peter huffed out a breath in surprise, nose scrunching as he forced himself to relax again. It was fine. It was a wipe. “I’m going to apply the stencil now. You wanted it dead-centre on the right cheek, yeah, mate?” Dave asked after a pause, and Peter nodded.

It would be more accurate to say that MJ wanted it there. Or at the least… That was the spot she’d chosen, when he’d lost the bet. Or… The pseudo bet. It was better to say that MJ had simply said she didn’t believe Peter would ever do something like this, and.

Here he was.

The stencil felt a little like rice paper. A little wet, and having some strange, scary dude palming his asscheek was definitely an experience, but Peter lay quietly through it, glancing nervously at his phone. 

God. He hoped Mr. Stark was too busy to call him today. Or worse, face-time him. Was Mr. Stark watching him through the camera? Had he hacked the microphone?

“Alright. Get up and have a look. We can wipe it off and re-place if its not right,” Dave instructed, and Peter moved gingerly, keeping hold of the waistband as he shuffled awkwardly over to the mirror and twisted.

There, emblazoned in dark purple on his asscheek, was Tony Stark. In a perfect replica of Tony’s elegant, eccentric scrawl. “He’s gonna kill me,” Peter breathed, staring at the stencil with growing horror. He caught Dave’s quizzical, raised eyebrow, and forced a grin. “Yeah, yeah. Its perfect. Right in the middle there. Great. Thanks.”

He lay back down, and after a brief warning, Dave begun.

“You lost a bet or something, kid? Or are you just…Really into the whole Iron Daddy thing?”

Peter wheezed.

Iron Daddy?!

“Lost a bet,” he managed to hiss out, burying his face into his arms. Oh, god. Thank whatever Deity was lurking up there that MJ wasn’t here to witness that. She’d immediately demand that the stencil was changed. Dave gave an affirmative sound from behind him.

“Why this guy? You a big fan or something? Or is it the opposite?”

“Uh… I guess a fan? I Intern. At SI,” Peter replied, wincing at a particularly harsh nip from the needles. It wasn’t so bad, all things considered. It stung, but it wasn’t the raging fire of pain that some people mentioned when they spoke about getting tattooed.

“Mmph. Must come with a nice paycheque. You gonna show him?”

“Absolutely not” Peter responded instantly, to Dave’s amused chuckle. Christ. Mr. Stark would fire him on the spot. He’d take back the suit. He’d get a restraining order. What mentor wanted their name on their eighteen year old mentee’s asscheek?

Then again.

Tony was egotistical enough that he’d probably love it, and think it was the most hilarious thing in the world, and Peter really wasn’t sure which one was worse. Not to mention that both involved him dropping his pants in front of his boss.

It was quiet for a little while after that, just the buzz of the needle and the odd puff of breath at the occasional sting from the gun.

“You know anything about knitting?” Dave asked after a pause, and Peter frowned, considering. He knew a little about sewing. He’d made his own suit, before Mr. Stark had showed up. Aunt May had taught him back when he’d thrown a tantrum over ripping his favourite shirt as an eight year old.

“Uh… Not really? I mean, I can sew a little. But I’ve never knit anything,” he remarked back, pondering it. Knitting was soft sweaters and thick scarves. It made him think of little old Russian ladies on their porches.

“My Ma wants to knit. Says she’s at that age. Told me to get her some wool and those special needles. I dunno the first thing about knitting.”

And that was how Peter learned that Dave’s Ma was what Peter imagined Ms. Romanoff would be when she was eighty, and that Dave’s main job was actually as a Doggy Daycare assistant at Paws ‘R Us.

“All done,” Dave announced, squirting a weird, green froth over Peter’s asscheek before wiping it lightly with a series of cloths. “Go take a look.” 

Peter obliging, sliding off the bench and twisting to see his butt in the mirror.

“Aw, man. This is gonna be on my mind literally every time I see him,” Peter complained, clapping a hand over his face. There, in what looked like thick Sharpie across his ass, was Tony’s signature. Forever. If he ever died, it would be with this stamped across his butt.

“He ain’t gonna know none, unless you drop your kick in front of him,” Dave shrugged, peeling off the gloves. Peter had to concede that he had a point. He had zero intentions of ever telling Mr. Stark what he’d done, and in the three years they’d known each other, Mr. Stark had never seen Peter in less than a shirt and bottoms.

MJ looked moderately impressed when she pulled the hem of his shorts down, peering at the taped-up tattoo with her phone flashlight. “I didn’t think you’d actually do it,” she shrugged, flopping back onto her bed and resuming the video she’d been watching on her phone.

Peter shuffled around to lay on his stomach on the bottom of the bed, slapping at her ankle. “Never tell a Peter Parker he can’t do something,” he announced, and MJ rolled her eyes.

“I never said you couldn’t do it. I said it was a stupid thing to do, and you argued it, and then decided it was your new personal challenge.”

Peter paused, then tipped his head. “Fair.”

Hiding it was both predictably and surprisingly easy. Peter spent the next few days sitting very gingerly and working himself up into a lather about meeting Mr. Stark on the weekend. Would Tony somehow know? What if MJ had emailed him to spill the secret?

What if Peter and his big mouth spilled it for him?

Except… It went fine. Tony picked him up in a sleek, red sportscar and they went straight to the Tower. Peter was taking a gap year in order to process what he wanted to do with his future. 

Spiderman suddenly changing locations would be suspicious, and sooner or later, someone would think to check on new students at local facilities. People moving for jobs, that sort of thing.

Mj was just… Refusing to comply with the Government agenda or something like that. Honestly, Peter was thankful. With Ned moving to San Francisco for college, things could get a little lonely.

Bar the odd self-conscious squirm, it went as any other meet-up went. They stuffed themselves silly with food in the penthouse and messed around with tech and prank-called Steve and by the end of the night, Peter had almost forgotten about his tattoo.

The twitchy, nervous fear that Tony would somehow turn around and demand to know why he had his name tattooed on his ass eventually faded, and life resumed as it had before he’d gotten the ink.

Which, of course, is exactly when things had to go wrong.

Really, Peter should have expected it. His luck ran in a pattern, and he should have walked on egg-shells the moment he realised things were relaxed and easy and his tattoo was still a secret.

It had been about a month since the tattoo. When he was alone, Peter couldn’t help but stare at it, running his finger over the shiny, black skin. Tony’s name, emblazoned like a brand across his ass. 

It became the focal point of more fantasies than his ass could keep up with, lazing floppy and exhausted and lube-covered on his bed, his mind reeling.

He imagined Tony tracing the letters with his tongue. Imagined Tony pinning him down and tattooing it himself. Imagined a different world where the branding was deliberate. A mark of ownership. Or a surprise. The look on Tony’s face when Peter would bend over, revealing his name.

And, as predicted, hiding it was no trouble at all. Peter had his own room in Tony’s penthouse, so if he needed to shower or sleep there, he had complete privacy. It helped that the Iron Spider and that Tony’s Mark II for the fabric Spiderman suit fit over his regular clothing now, so he didn’t even have to strip to do his thing.

The one thing he didn’t factor in, was a disastrous inventory day combined with the decision to wear white boxers. There’d been a raid on a medical facility kidnapping people to experiment on and most of the equipment and tech had been turned over to Tony for examination, classification and destruction. Peter was there to help, sleepy-eyed and not quite as focused as he ought to be.

He didn’t check the lid on the canister was tight before picking it up.

He didn’t see the drop of oil on the floor where Dum-E had been trundling around, moving things.

He slipped with a whelp, still clutching the container as he slid and twisted, bumping canister first into the edge of the table. He was vaguely aware of Tony shouting as his vision filled with pink dust that stung his eyes and seemed to cling to his clothes.

“Peter! Jesus H - Get in the med-shower, now! I turned away for five seconds kiddo, how did you -” Tony’s frantic muttering stops and starts as he grabbed onto Peter’s arm, dragging him across the workshop to the tiny little emergency shower stall in the corner. 

Peter could do nothing but stagger along, blinking frantically to clear his eyes of dust and pink.

It doesn’t even fully register he’s inside the stall until the first blast of water rained down on him, cold like ice before immediately coming something akin to tepid. He spluttered, trying to flatten himself back against the wall as his hair fell down into his eyes and the water streamed down his mouth, his hair, his back.

He gasped as the water trickled down his thighs, soaking through the cotton of his sweatpants and making them heavy. His shirt clung to his torso like plastic wrap and stuck-peeled uncomfortably with each heaving, shuddering breath.

“Yeah, sorry. This thing acts for burns too, so. Gotta keep it cool,” Tony murmured from outside the stall, head tilting sympathetically even as Peter scowled at him from under the battering stream. “Take your clothes off,” Tony instructed, turning to look over his shoulder.

“What?” Peter squeaked, eyes widening as he wrapped his arms around himself protectively. Tony glanced back at him with a raised eyebrow. 

“Relax, munchkin. My moves are smoother than that. It was a powder. Its likely it got inside your clothes, too,” he pointed out. Peter wanted to argue. Wanted to say if he just stood here long enough the risk was over, but.

“Turn around,” he huffed adamantly, scowling harder at Tony’s snort. But the genius complied, turning away and folding his arms as he observed the settling dust cloud. Peter counted to ten slowly, teeth chattering under the cold spray before he peeled off his shirt. 

The water on his skin was even more unbearable and he gave a whine of protest as he begun to work at the strings of his sweats, letting them fall with a disgusting, heavy slop.

“I was naked in front of you before,” Tony pointed out conversationally and Peter spat out water, shaking his head before pushing his hair from his eyes.

“That doesn’t count. The armour ripped your clothing off in beta deployment,” he pointed out, though he couldn’t help softening at the memory, snickering as he turned his back to Tony, scrubbing at his body. 

It had been hilarious. The actual deployment had gone fine, it was just when Tony had deactivated it that the armour had shrunk in on itself, taking his beaten old tank top and ratty workshop jeans with it.

“Both were an accident. Both involved one of us witnessing the other in a state of undress. Although my back has been dutifully turned since you commanded it, by the way. And both were equally hilarious in that my own armour undressed me, and you essentially became a - What is that?”

Peter jolted, having sunk into a daydream state of listening to Tony talk as he wiped himself down. He looked over his shoulder to find Tony staring straight at him, expression delighted and curious. Or, rather, straight at his ass.

Oh.

Oh no.

“Nothing!” he yelped, twisting to flatten his back against the wall. He’d left his boxers on for the sake of not trusting that Tony wouldn’t forget his vow of not looking, and had completely forgotten they were white. 

Which also meant that his dick was now flat out bared to his mentor. With a howl of frustration he twisted so he was side-on to Tony, curling up and glowering with all the muted rage he could muster.

“Its a logo. On my boxers,” he ground out.

“I think not,” Tony shot back gleefully, leaning on the protective railing with an absolutely manic glint to his eye. Peter almost groaned aloud, head falling back under the spray. It was too late. He was doomed. His heart begun to pound and the air he was sucking in felt like it wasn’t enough.

“You have a tattoo. On your ass. Right there,” Tony pointed out, as though Peter didn’t know it. Peter tried to glare but it came out feeble, weak. Fuck. He was screwed. So screwed! 

“What is it? Who’s name is it? Its clearly a name,” Tony continued, pestering for the information.

“Go away!” Peter barked lightly, shifting restlessly under the cool stream. Tony just shrugged easily at him and leaned through the gap, hitting the OFF button for the water. He seemed unfazed at Peter’s shuffling or his attempted aggression, smiling at him sweetly.

“You can tell me, or I can ask JARVIS. JARVIS is nice, he’ll tell me.”

And Peter’s blood runs cold, because there’s no doubt that JARVIS will. Peter never swore him to secrecy, and Mr. Stark’s name on his ass isn’t anything concerning to the AI.

“Its nothing! Oh my god, its just a tattoo!” he complained, making a shooing motion at his mentor as he side-stepped his sodden clothing. “Go get me a towel. And clean clothes. Please,” he huffed, fingers digging into his sides where he’d wrapped his arms around himself. Tony gave him a devilish grin, then gestured upwards.

“J?”

“It appears to be your name in your own handwriting, Sir,” JARVIS dutifully responded, his voice ringing like church bells through the room. The silence that followed was deafening and panic seeped like ice through Peter’s veins as Tony’s childish, gleeful look faded into complete, lax shock.

This is it. Everything he’s done, the last two years, the friendships and the Internship and Spiderman being Iron Man’s little tagalong… All gone. He’ll never eat day-old pizza with Clint again. He’ll never have Dum-E running over his foot again. The terror and panic bubbled up before he could stop it.

“Oh my god. Mr. Stark - You can’t - I’m so sorry. I swear, I wouldn’t have gotten it and especially not there but I just - I never thought you’d see it and -”

“Turn around,” Tony cut him off mildly, but his tone was firm. It was enough to snap Peter’s jaw shut as he stared, nails digging into his ribs as he blinked under the droplets that fell from his lashes. He sucked in a breath, staring in confusion.

“…What?” he breathed, pressing back against the shower wall as Tony advanced, unlocking the cubicle door to lean against the frame, eyeing him like a prime cut of steak.

“I said turn around,” Tony repeated patiently, raising one hand to make a little spinning gesture with his finger, as if Peter was a trick dog. Peter shook his head, horror quickly dawning as he realised not only what Tony was asking, but also the fact that if his boxers were that see-through…Facing the man directly was probably not the best idea.

He shuffled to the side as much as he could without baring either delicate matter. Tony’s lips quirked in amusement at this and he hummed softly as Peter shook his head. 

“Mr. Stark, its not - Its just your name, I swear. You sign it like every day, you don’t need to look,” he pleaded, shivering in the cool temperature of the workshop as the water begun to dry on his skin, running down in rivulets.

“I don’t sign it on your ass every day,” Tony pointed out, stepping closer. Peter wanted to stall, to argue that technically Tony hadn’t actually signed his ass, except his mentor was moving closer, reaching out slowly as though he might spook if he moved too fast. 

He was so close Peter could see the flakes of gold in his eyes, could smell the minty-motor-oil combination.

The first brush of Tony’s fingertips had his skin jumping like a colts, the touch so gentle it almost tickled. It was on the arch of his hips, skating the waistband of his sodden boxers before pressing just slightly to encourage him to turn. Tony’s gaze was tipped down, dark on his own.

“You can say no,” Tony reminded him softy, the hungry look in his eyes fading for a brief moment, replaced by something tender and careful. Peter sucked in a breath but didn’t resist as he was spun slowly on the spot, hands coming up to brace on the tiles. 

“How long?” Tony asked after a moment, thumbs pressing into the backs of his hips, breath hot across his shoulder.

“A month,” he managed to whisper, pressing his forehead to the wall as Tony’s thumbs slid along the waistband teasingly, catching and pulling but never dipping it more than an inch. 

Peter shuddered under the gentle touches, lips parting when Tony finally begun to slide the sodden material down his hips, over the large swell of his ass.

“You should have told me,” Tony rumbled, head ducking to mouth a lazy, open kiss to his bare shoulder, his stubble scratching just slightly. Peter shuddered as he felt the fabric slip to under his asscheeks, tight in the groove where it met his thigh but not overly uncomfortable. “Should have shown me sooner” Tony murmured into his skin.

And then the warmth of his breath was gone as he leaned back, and Peter could hear the gravelly, husked fuck that he uttered as he looked down, palm sliding around Peter’s flank so he could swipe his thumb across the dark sheen of the ink. 

Peter held his breath, tensing at the touch, though it didn’t hurt. Tony’s hand left his side to slide down between his shoulders soothingly.

“My name. On that perfect, juicy ass. Branded on there forever,” Tony was murmured, voice lethal and rasped as he stroked over it slowly, reverently. “Does that make you feel good, sweetheart? Knowing my claim is on you? In such an intimate place, too? Did you choose this?” Tony hummed, breath ghosting down Peter’s spine as he sank slowly to his knees.

Peter wasn’t about to let Tony know that actually, stamping it on his ass had been MJ’s idea. Especially not when Tony pressed a gentle, scratchy kiss over the tattoo. 

Especially not when he licked over the letters slowly, palms falling down to cup Peter’s asscheeks firmly. It was all he could do to whine, high and pathetic as he trembled under Tony’s hold.

Tony continued to mouth at the tattoo, lavishing it with nips and sloppy kisses as he kneaded at Peter’s asscheeks, almost distracting him enough to spread them with his thumbs, the kisses slowly travelling right until hot air right over there made Peter jolt, eyes snapping open.

“Mr. Star - Ahhhh-Ohhh,” his yelp faded into a gasp, which trickled into a breathless moan as Tony planted a firm kiss to the swirl of muscle between his thighs, sucking ever so slightly before promptly laving his tongue in a fat, wet stripe upwards.

“No idea what it does to me, kiddo. Seeing my name there. Marked on you forever. Marking you as mine,” Tony spoke against him, licking and kissing thoroughly between his words as Peter scrabbled at the tiles, desperately trying to keep himself from rocking back against Tony’s tongue.

One of Tony’s hands left his ass to stroke across his flank, delicate in its search before wrapping around his cock with a surprising firmness. Peter’s hips immediately jumping forwards into the grip and his moan was staggered as Tony paired it with a thrust of his tongue.

He mewled, embarrassingly high and and desperate as he threw one hand back, sliding his fingers gently into Tony’s hair. It was soft, far more silken than he had expected for something that stuck up in odd places when not professionally attacked by a stylist. 

Tony gave a soft sound of encouragement, nipping at him and sliding his hand up to stroke at the tip of his flushed cock.

“Mr. Stark, please,” he gasped, fingers twisting lightly in the soft, dark locks and hips stuttering minutely between Tony’s hot, wet tongue and his firm, slow grip. He wasn’t going to last; not with Tony Stark finally touching him. Not with the scrape of his stubble and the husk of his voice.

Tony chuckled against him, the vibrations making Peter shudder before he rose slowly, kissing a wet path from the small of Peter’s back to his shoulders, never stopping in stroking him slowly, firmly. 

“So eager, sweetheart. So precious,” Tony breathed against his skin, his hand leaving Peter’s hip to fumbled between them, knuckles brushing the round meat of his ass as he tugged his belt free of its buckle.

The slap of cold metal made Peter jolt, hips bucking in Tony’s grip and wrenching a whine from his throat as Tony squeezed him lightly, dipping his thumb into the tip and pushing at the bead of pre-cum that oozed there. 

“Steady, darling,” Tony huffed into his ear, the smirk audible in his voice. Peter opened his mouth to reply, but then there was the sudden feel of a thick, long cock resting in the line of his asscheeks, heavy and hot and he could do nothing but groan weakly.

“Hush, sweetheart. I’m not gonna take you apart yet. Not here. When I do that, you’ll be on my bed, spread out and sloppy for me,” Tony soothed, jerking him off in steady, tight strokes as he rocked his hips, dragging his cock between Peter’s asscheeks with a soft hiss of pleasure.

Tony flattened against his back, careless of the fact that Peter was still dripping water as he nuzzled into his neck, one hand roaming from Peter’s asscheek to his own cock and back, petting and stroking.

 Peter could feel the slow, hot build of an orgasm coiling in his gut, could feel his thighs shaking with the effort of keeping still as he let his head fall back onto Tony’s shoulder with a feeble  gasp.

Tony pressed open-mouthed kisses to his temple, training down to his neck where he nipped softly as he thrust against him, a seemingly never-ending, thick drag of heavy cock that Peter instantly wished was buried deep within him. 

Tony’s moans were deep, slow things, soft in his ear as he pushed his hips back, arching his spine to give Tony a better, tighter angle.

“Fuck, sweetheart. So good for me. That’s it,” Tony purred, one hand dropping to briefly pinch over his tattoo, speeding up his hand and his thrusts as they moved together. It was Tony’s cock catching on his rim that did it, pressing there briefly as though he was slide right in, paired with the ragged gasp the older man gave at the sensation.

Peter’s hips stuttered forwards and his high moan pitched into a yelp as Tony gave him a rough down-stroke, his cock jumping in his grip before painting the tiles in milky splashes. Peter shook in Tony’s hold, eyes squeezed shut and chest heaving as Tony worked him through it, continued to chase his own pleasure.

“My sweet boy. All branded as mine, coming on my cock and my touch. Look at you, baby. So good. So good, Peter. Fuck. Seeing my name, my writing on your ass… I’m gonna ruin you later,” Tony promised, voice ragged, hand falling from Peter’s cock to squeeze his ass, thumb sliding over the signature as he chased his own orgasm. Peter fell breathless against the cool tile, rocking back against the firm, heavy slide of Tony’s cock.

“Please, Tony. Fuck me. Mark me. Take me,” he rambled, breath hitching as Tony pulled back with a groan, nails digging into his ass. 

The older man looked down, managing to pull his hips back and angle his cock in just enough time to paint thick ropes of cum right over his tattoo, the thick, creamy liquid sliding over the ink wetly. Peter let out another mewl, his cock twitching feebly at the thought as Tony panted behind him.

There was a fumble, the rustle of fabric, and Peter opened his eyes, looking over his shoulder in time to see Tony snap a photo of it. His cheeks burned with arousal and humiliation, but Tony dived forwards, capturing his mouth in a firm, wet kiss. 

Peter was breathless by the time Tony pulled back, the corners of his mouth tingling with stubble burn.

“Marked as mine. Twice,” Tony murmured into his cheek, pressing another soft kiss there.

#Fanfic #Fan Fic #Starker #Starker Prompt #Starker Fic #Starker Fill #Starker Prompt Fill #Starker Request #Starker Fanfic #Starker Fanfiction #Starker Smut #Starker PWP #IronSpider #IronSpider Fic #IronSpider Fanfic #IronSpider Smut #IronSpider PWP #IronSpider Prompt #ironspider prompts #IronSpider Request #peter parker x tony stark #tony stark/peter parker #tony stark x peter parker #sie fics

[k1ng-for-a-day]

Fluff headcanons for Freddy and Jason, platonic/friends

:00000000 Another request??? How intriguing. I’m kinda excited for this one actually, (probably because I actually like Freddy Krueger. Sorry I’m a dumbass). Anyways I hope you enjoy this, even thought it’s probably not the greatest.

A platonic friendship between two different entities? Might seem a bit rough, but they’ll make it. I think,

🖤How The Hell Did This Happen?🖤

😼🗡 I feel like it was on accident when they became ‘close’ with each other. Like the Mondo and Ishimaru situation in Danganronpa, except it wasn’t at a bath house. (Imagine it though-)

😼🗡 It probably started because Krueger was jealous of Jason, and attempted to mimick his own rival in order to beat his own game. In the end, however, Jason would always laugh at Freddy being a dumbass, and would attempt to help him.

😼🗡 Freddy being egotistical was probably like, “get tf away I’m fine 😾” and would do everything on his own. When he would almost successfully complete the task, Jason would outsmart him and ruin his scheme. At this point Freddy was pissed at him for doing this and confronted him about it.

😼🗡 “Hey forest tumor, what the fuck did you do to my plan?” The crispy ass bacon man asked the hockey masked man.

😼🗡 Jason simply snickered and said one word, “Yes.”

😼🗡 At this point Freddy is just amused, abliterated, broken, bewildered, and utterly frustrated at this point. He started to retort something to Jason and they start a whole ass argument. This argument practically lasts for generations, but suddenly Jason came up with an idea. He quickly wrote it down..

😼🗡 What it said was this: If Freddy could somehow not become egotistical for a week, then Jason will serve Freddy in the dream world. If Jason could become more ‘selfish’ than ‘selfless’, then Freddy will get whatever he wants. The two agreed to this arrangement and thought they were going to win.

Day 1

😼🗡 Everything is off to a pretty decent start. Freddy had attempted to help people much more, and has completely removed the snarkiness within his comments. Additionally he’s also made more people happy within this short outcome. It seemed like he was a generally nice guy. Like he was before... the event. Nevertheless Krueger seemed immensely different to the one we all know of.

😼🗡 Jason on the other hand was a different story. He was unable to give small berries to the creatures within the forest, and had to act more like Krueger. How was he supposed to do that? It was difficult for him nonetheless, but he barely succeeded. At some points of the trial he had to stop himself, think, and stop what he was doing. He just couldn’t help himself at all it seemed. He was having an identity crisis at this point.

😼🗡 When talking to each other that day, Krueger kept covering his mouth everytime he was about to say something snarky or narcissistic. He even stopped himself before he said a very, very horny comment. Jason on the other hand had to come up with really egotistical things to say, which were hilarious but cute. He would write things like, “I-I have the b-best m-mask.” or little things like that. Freddy wanted to laugh so badly, but he was unable to. It seems like torture for both parts.

Day 2

😼🗡 The next day, Jason knew what to do; he needed different clothes in order to help him concentrate. He quickly took something inside his cabin, and put it on quickly. He stared at himself for a bit, and tried other outfits. Once he found one he deemed “acceptable”, he went out of his cabin and started to act a bit more ‘stern’ to say the least. It really seemed like his soul was twisted in a way that he was completely nothing. That he was a pure void and there was nothing more.

😼🗡 On the other hand, Freddy still had a difficult time. He would cover his mouth before saying certain words, doing certain actions, etc. It came down to the point he wouldn’t speak, and he would write little notes instead. These notes were usually ‘nice’, and if someone didn’t like how it seemed he would explain what he meant. It seemed like he became a bit more shy within these set of rules. It was strange since yesterday he was completely fine, but now everything seems.. off.

😼🗡 When they went to talk, Jason spoke in barely understandable sentences. He said certain words that helped convey his message, but Krueger was confused. In the end they just wrote notes to each other, even though Voorhees still attempted to speak.

Day 3

😼🗡 At this point, Freddy felt immensely off. The dream world felt like a living hell for him, so he had to leave it quickly. He put on a jacket, and went into the woods. It was much more humble, calm, and overall a decent environment. It was very nice. What the fuck is happening to him..?

😼🗡Coincidentally, Jason wanted to leave the forest, stumbling upon Freddy and raised his voice at him. Only a few words actually came out, “LEAVE, BURNT RAT”, and that was all.

😼🗡 As Voorhees continued on his little quest for ‘freedom’, he walked into an urban environment; something he wasn’t use to. His eyes were wide like a child, and he was absolutely flabbergasted. Many people went up to him with strange looks, but no one really cared. He was like a kid in a candy store. He wanted it all, he needed it all. That was his dream; to become a dictator. Or was it really his? Was he high or smth?

Day 4

😼🗡 After yesterday, Jason rented a hotel with the little money he had, and acted like he had bank. He would attempt to add little comments in order to make people pay attention to him, and he just became someone completely different. In actuality, he just didn’t want to fail his own bet. He wanted to succeed, prevail, and show Krueger who are ally was the king.

😼🗡 On the other side of the spectrum, Krueger was more outgoing and had a blast in a more natural environment. The only problem was that it was more difficult to maintain his jokes than anything he could imagine. This really wasn’t him, but if it’s a bet he’ll play, it’s one to win a game.

😼🗡 On that particular day, they refused to chat with each other. They didn’t even want to look at each other. They were upset, stuck, and trapped in this ‘new world’.

Day 5

😼🗡 On this one day, he snapped. Someone entered the dream world that he was immensely upset about. This person was very confident, snotty, and somewhat a bitch. Everytime he tried to catch this ‘person’, he was out played by one of their tricks. It got to the point where he was the one embarrassed, and overall frustrated that he wasn’t successful. So, he finally gave up and said this, “Shut it you watered down version of Fifty Shades of Grey. Do you even know who you’re fucking messing with? I’m Freddy Krueger hun, and this place is hell on Earth for you!”

😼🗡On the flip side, Jason realized shortly that what he was doing was completely stupid. He thought about what his mother would say in this instance, and was disappointed within himself. He became what he hated most in a few short days. In the end he decided to leave his hotel room, and return to the quiet, peaceful life he once had. He laid on the grass and sighed, wondering how his rival was doing in the dream world. “Maybe he lost too? No, he probably won.” He thought to himself. He was nervous for the end result.

😼🗡When Jason entered the dream world, he was ready to admit defeat. He sat down in front of Krueger, and wrote about his failure. To his surprise, his rival actually nodded along with him. He revealed that he also lost as well. In the end the both were confused on what to do, but realize that they kind of had it hard for each other. One raise by the quiet sounds of the forest, while the other was raised in a hostile, urban environment were disaster could easily happen. It was enjoyable, but kind of self destructive. Since then they actually became acquaintances with each other.

🖤The Relationship🖤

😼🗡 Ever since then, these two were fucking chaotic. One in a dream, while the other in the sheets. (I tried to make a dirty joke but I messed up-)

😼🗡 These two would literally have non stop arguments about their favorite things. For example if Freddy brought up his favorite genre of movie, Jason would write about how his opinion is wrong, and they would just be in a huge feud. They wouldn’t fight, but they would argue non stop until someone gives up. (Jason would usually succeed when it came to these arguments since Krueger would get bored and think they’re “useless”).

😼🗡 I feel like their friendship would be like Ishimaru and Mondo; they hate but love each other. Like Freddy will be like, “Wtf it’s the walking stick 😾,” and then Jason would be like, “🥺🥺💞💞,” and then it would just be a whole other feud.

😼🗡 When it comes to affection Jason attempts to hug Freddy, but Krueger is a pain in the ass. He would immediately get him off and say a snobby comment about he “doesn’t need attention like this because he’s already perfectly fine.” In the end he’ll just submit to the physical attention. When Freddy actually wants to give Jason ‘affection’, however, he’ll say something like, “Wow walking stick, you actually look nice,” or some half assed compliment. Sometimes he’ll actually genuinely say something nice, but it’s rare since he’s not that type of person.

😼🗡 When Jason gives Krueger a compliment, he’ll just say something like, “damn right I am!” Or something narcissistic. If Jason writes something like, “you’re adorable”, Freddy will act very dramatic towards it, and kind of weak. Later on he’ll start to give him the worst nightmare of his life, apologize, and act like a prick, but he actually likes compliments like those. He just won’t admit it because he wants to act like he’s better than everyone else. He wants to appear tougher, more on edge, and a fucking god compared to the others.

😼🗡 If Voorhees flusters Krueger enough, however, Freddy will attempt to kill him. 👏👏👏

😼🗡 Sometimes they’ll give each other some dumbass gifts that are usually made to insult each other. For example Freddy gets a pot/pan, and Jason would get something like a shower cap or body wash. Just something to poke fun at each other with.

😼🗡 Later on they’ll actually start talking/venting to one another about their past, current situations, and other things. Sometimes it’ll get to the point one of them actually shows signs of feelings. Sometimes Jason will actually catch Freddy crying a bit, but he’ll make some dumb excuse. “I-I was just laugh! T-that’s all...” or “I-it’s just a power of mine! I-I can’t... feel..”

😼🗡 When it comes to Jason admitting his feelings to Krueger, he’ll actually be like a dad to him somewhat. Like he actually fucking cares about his well being. It’s kind of interesting actually.

😼🗡 Sometimes Jason will catch Krueger looking at himself with a mirror he made, and ask, “Am I really good enough?” And other things as well. He’ll even tell terrible things about himself in order to make sure he can actually feel. It just to the point he might actually cry. Once he tears up a bit, he’ll immediately throw the mirror on the ground and breakdown for a bit. It’s best not to both him in this state.

😼🗡 If Krueger is a bit harsh on himself, Jason will actually comfort him in a way. He’ll still be mad, but a bit calmer.

😼🗡 When it comes to Jason, on the other hand, he will never cry in front of Freddy in fear he’ll be made fun of. When he does cry it’s usually in his cabin, or somewhere quiet in the dreamworld. If Freddy does actually see this, he’ll actually pay him on the shoulder, lecture him about it, and just hope he’ll be a bit calmer that way. Usually he doesn’t know how to handle sad situations like this, but he attempts to in order to make people more welcome. Even though it may not actually help at all, it does benefit the situation in a way.

😼🗡 When Jason vents to Freddy, he holds him like a teddy bear in order to feel secure.

😼🗡 U h anyways....

Shit I thought of:

😼🗡 Freddy is a chaotic neutral crackhead and Jason’s a lawful good soft boy. What could possibly go wrong?

😼🗡 I feel like if Voorhees were to sing a song, Freddy would either join him or force him to shut the fuck up.

Jason would actually have a good, quiet voice that would be decent for certain songs. (Basically his voice would probably sound like certain opera voices but very soft).

Kruegers is very raspy and would mainly be good for rock songs.

And NEVER UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES introduce them to vocaloid. There is a reason for it and it would cause destruction for the w h o l e w o r l d.

😼🗡 I feel like if they were to get lost, Freddy would get them deep into an awful rabbit hole, or Jason would actually find a way out of the predicament.

😼🗡 Honestly Freddy will act as though he is the most craziest person Jason has ever met. In actuality, Jason is the most insane person he’s met. And his mother too.

😼🗡 When these two talk about music, honey you are in danger. Freddy will talk about rock from the 1960s, and bring up some other modern day songs he’s actually interested in. Jason would critic him and say classical music is the way to go. Or literally forest sounds. Depends on his mood. When it comes to this argument, they will deadass fight each other. No joke. They will literally get anything they have and start World War 3.

😼🗡 Everytime Freddy tries to say a horny joke, Jason will smack him with anything he can find in the room. Favorite one to smack him with- pots and pans.

😼🗡 I feel like this relationship is a mixture of two people who should never interact become each other’s support or something like that.

Welp, that is practically all I could think of currently. I know this was somewhat short, but honestly I can’t really think of much. Unless someone has any other good ideas, I hope you enjoyed this! And thank you so much for your request!

#slashers #dbd #dbd art #dbd claudette #dbd dwight #dbd fanart #dbd fanfic #dbd frank #dbd ghostface #dbd killer #freddy krueger #nightmare on elm street #slasher x slasher #slasher x s/o #slasher x you #slasher x reader #slasher movies #jason voorhees x you #jason voorhees #michael myers x you #michael myers #brahms heelsire x reader #brahms smut #dbd michael myers #dbd legion #dbd joey #dbd ask blog

[bnhabadass]

would it be weird if I asked for a dabi nsfw alphabet??? XP

Today we honor the birthday of the one and only burnt chicken nugget, Dabi. I’ve gotten a lot of Dabi requests lately and as much as I want to have written all of them for his birthday, I am only one woman and I have the attention span of a literal duck.

So please enjoy these Dabi NSFW alphabet head canons to honor the literal love of my life.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Let’s be honest, Dabi is probably a really big asshole after sex. If you’re just a hookup that is. He doesn’t get you anything, doesn’t make sure you’re doing okay. He’ll most-likely just fall asleep and sneak out in the middle of the night.

But if you’re someone he’s dating, someone he really cares about, he’ll try his best to make sure you’re alright after. He’ll be very awkward about it, though. He doesn’t want it to come off as if you have him wrapped around your finger, even though that’s totally the case.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Even though he has this super hot, badass exterior, he’s really self conscious about the way he looks. That being said, his favorite body part of his is probably his dick. It’s not even an egotistical thing, kind of. Yeah, he does love the things his dick is able to do to you and how good it can make you feel, but it’s the only part of him that doesn’t remind him of his past and his childhood.

He was initially drawn to you because of your tits. He loves them. Anything he can do with them. He’ll spread them apart, push them together, suck on your nipples, motorboat them. He just loves your titties.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

It turns him on seeing you with a little bit of his cum dripping down your lips. If you’ve just sucked him off and he sees you look up at him with a sultry look in your eyes, drops of cum threatening to fall from your lips, he’ll instantly get hard again.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He wouldn’t mind if you wanted Hawks to join in on your fun. He wouldn’t ask because he doesn’t want to seem like you’re not enough for him, but it’s something he’s definitely thought about a lot.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

He has had a lot of hookups, but you’re his first real relationship. That being said, he’s had a lot of practice and knows many ways to pleasure you, ways you hadn’t even thought of before you started dating.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

He likes missionary position because he’s able to see you sprawled out, begging for him. Since some people find missionary to be boring or vanilla, Dabi finds himself wanting to incorporate kinkier aspects into your sex life.

While he loves it when you’re below him, he wouldn’t mind it if you took charge. I feel like he’d even be into pegging if you’re comfortable with that.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

He’s a big fucking tease. I wouldn’t say he’s goofy or silly in the moment, but he’ll definitely tease a lot and get pretty cocky with what he’s saying.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

He doesn’t give a fuck. It’s like a fucking jungle down there and he doesn’t care one bit. His pubic hair is black like his head hair, but I don’t think he dyed it to match. The carpet just never matched the drapes.

He also doesn’t care if you’re shaved or not because at the end of the day, a pussy is a pussy. He’ll still go down regardless.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

He’s usually just in the mood for a quick fuck and he’s kind of a kinky bastard, so everything he does is a little rough and esentially for his own pleasure. He still wants to get you off, but he won’t be very gentle about it.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

All the time. Even after you two started dating. If he needs to get off and you’re not there to take care of it for him, he’ll do it himself. But don’t expect him to do it when he knows you’re available to.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

This man has all the kinks. He really likes fucking you when you’re bound up and can’t move. He’s also a super big tease and is really into orgasm denial. He won’t stop unless you are begging and whining for him to let you cum.

I can also see Dabi being really into public sex. It’s thrilling to have to sneak around.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

Anywhere. The league’s hideout, your apartment, public restroom. He’ll make sure that you’re screaming his name extra loud if he knows one of the league members is nearby. He wants them all to know who you are obedient to.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Seeing you fight really gets him going. Whether it’s hand to hand combat or you’re using your quirk, nothing is sexier than seeing that determined glint in your eyes as you work up a sweat.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

A lot of people see Dabi as someone who would be into noncon/nonconsentual sex, but I just don’t see it. Sure he’s a villain and a scumbag, but the reason he’s a villain is because of the flaws in hero society. I’ll be frank, he’s definitely not the most respectful to women, but I just cannot see him taking advantage of another person in that way.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

He would much rather receive than give. Most people would much rather receive than give, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t love seeing you writhe underneath him and beg for him to keep going. He probably has a tongue piercing. He loves abusing you with that.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Always fast and rough. Even in the most romantic times, which there have been very little, he’s fucking you faster than you can breathe. The only times he goes slow is when he’s teasing you and waiting for you to beg him to fuck you.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

If he has time for a quickie then he’s down for a quickie. All sex is sex to him. The only difference is whether or not it’s with you.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

He can go for three rounds without needing a break in between, but he can usually go for another two after that. If you need a pee break or a snack break he’ll wait, but expect him to get impatient rather quickly.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

He didn’t have any toys before he met you. Sex toys can get kind of expensive, and all he really did was hookups anyways. But he probably stole something from the back of a Spencer’s for you for your birthday. Whatever he stole, it was definitely something for him to use on you like handcuffs or a remote control vibrator.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Dabi is the BIGGEST tease out there. He teases you until you’ve practically collapsed from orgasm denial. Even when you aren’t having sex he’s teasing you somehow. He likes it when you become a blushing mess in public, and he’ll tease you in front of the other league members constantly.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He’ll groan and even let out a moan once in a while, but the most noise he makes is when he’s telling you to be louder.

“Come on, babydoll. Say my name. Good girl. Now cum for daddy, sweetheart.”

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon or scenario for the character of your choice)

Dabi probably has a piercing kink. If you want him to give you a facial piercing or something, he’ll want to fuck you immediately after. Seeing you wince from the needle just gets him going. He’s not that big into pain play, but when you’re under him and at his mercy, he can’t help but get a little hard.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

About 8 inches long and kind of skinny, but anything he lacks he makes up with in skill.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Sex is never not on his mind. Have I not made that clear? If you are anywhere, and I mean anywhere, he’ll mind a way to tease you, turn you into a blushing mess, and in some cases, fuck you right on the spot.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

If he’s just hooking up, he’s out like a light almost as soon as he cums. With you though? Well he’s still pretty much out like a light, but he’d be down for a little bit of sweet talk and cuddling if you’re up for the task. I can’t promise that won’t lead to more fucking, though.

#Dabi #dabi x reader #mha dabi #bnha dabi #a to z challenge

[popculturebuffet]

Darkwing Duck Reviews: Tiff of the Titans

Uh-Oh, Gizmoduck Comes to town! In the first of a series of reviews building up to Just Us Justice Ducks,  the dopey, arrogant, anti-charasmatic, national embarrassment heads to St. Canard to guard a super weapon from F.O.W.L. Naturally, he ends up being more of a problem for our hero than the actual bad guys. Also a look at Tad Stone’s claims the series isn’t in the same universe as Ducktales.  Full review and recap commissioned by @weirdkev27​ under the cut

This review, much like Death, Taxes and Thanos, was inevitable. I’d been planning to watch and review the first appearances of each of the justice ducks and fearsome five as my next step in watching Darkwing duck anyway, and while I’ve already got one member’s appearance in the wings anyway, I’ll get to that tomorrow or Saturday just in time for Halloween, hint hint, Kev pushed this one into the queue with a commission and I  was happy to take the side trip to see just what the Darkwing version of Gizmoduck and Steelbeak, two of my favorites in the reboot, were like originally. So welcome folks to the build to the greatest superhero team made up of ducks of all time, let’s get quackin. 

We open, here in Duckburg, where the Eggmen are breaking in. Sadly they do not have the master plan, but they are here to steel the Comarant, a super powerful land, sea and air device the military is storing there. They instead find Gizmoduck! Who makes a good first impression, being a hoaky superman parody in iron man’s costume in this continuity, but it’s a nice way to contrast to Darkwing’s batman parody with a touch of Sandman.. the pulp one not the neil gaiman one.  Sadly he doesn’t have a cool gas mask but the Darkwing Duck costume is iconic without it. 

Point is the eggmen are easily repelled, though they do get away by blasting Gizmo with a tank. The General in charge is thankful for Gizmoduck’s help, but notes the Comarant will be heading to St. Canard soon for a demonstration at the big air show, and asks that Giz go over and protect it, maybe even work with Darkwing to protect it. Though Gizmo shoots that down, and not only insults Darkwing but says he’s not sure if he’s good or bad. While the latter comment did sour me on the guy.. research bears out Darkwing has been framed once or twice, and my own experience with the pilot saw him you know breaking out of jail and basically clamming superheroes are above the law, so I COULD get why someone wouldn’t trust him, even if Giz’s attitude about it still isn’t great. So fenton quick changes behind a sign and heads off to see his old buddy Launchpad.  A quick aside before we get going this episode doesn’t so much torch Tad Stone’s retroactive claim this isn’t the same universe as Ducktales, as burn it to ashes, take a whiz on those ashes and send each separate ash on a seperate probe to the farthest reaches of space. This episode not only has a cameo by Scrooge on a billboard.. but it’s one for DUCKBURG. Where Gizmoduck is said to be from. He also knows launchpad well, and vice versa, and outright mentions McDuck Manor. the episode couldn’t be saying “this is the same universe as ducktales’ harder if Scrooge himself showed up and started ranting about a Sea Monster eating his ice cream. I do like and respect Tad Stones, but I will never like or respect this claim of his and even if HE had that idea in his head during production of the show, it’s very clear everyone else including Disney who greenlit the Darkwing Duck comics explicitly connecting the two universes, felt it was a shared universe, and there’s really no reason they can’t coexist. 

If it’s because “Well launchpad wouldn’t leave scrooge”.. besides the fact Scrooge tried to fire him MULTIPLE times, it’s not farfetched Scrooge would put him in charge of a hangar both because he trusts him.. and to get rid of him since he doesn’t like Launchpad very much. Plus Donald has to come back from his tour of duty sometime and likely could easily do Launchpad’s job as pilot, as he did in the source material. My point is there’s tons of ways to write the man out easily, and he could just as easily be doing both jobs like in the reboot. This feels like a weird, unnecessary retcon no one wanted and everyone just politely ignores, like the creators of Doug saying he and Patti didn’t end up together after High School. Which even then makes more sense than this claim, since at least there I get the creators not thinking a high school romance would last forever. That’s fair.. it’s just not something fans really wanted to hear after spending two separate series and a movie getting them together. It would be like if Girl Meets World had revealed Cory and Topanga had divorced. Yes it’d be possible since they’d broken up twice over the course of the series, but no one wanted that, why would you do that. I’m getting off topic, the point is a few breakups aside Doug and Patti clearly married eventually, and Darkwing Duck and Ducktales are in the same universe. Sometimes you just have to ignore Word of God for your own sanity.

Back at the actual episode we cut to Steelbeak’s Bowling Alley Hideout... and I do love a job that allows me to say things like that. But in a really fantastic bit Steelbeak is bowling his minions over as punishment for failure.. even though they have a valid reason but eh he’s the bad guy and he has to get his bowling average up for FOWL’s bowling team somehow. Their insurance covers evil punishment related accidents anyways, they’ll be fine. 

But yeah let’s talk about Steelbeak for a second. I honestly hadn’t seen any of the original version so I was curious.. and he’s really damn awesome. Rob Paulsen always does a great job though and is always a pleasure, but he really does a good job here and with the contrast in him: He’d seem like a dumb thug, what with his gangster accent and general cockiness and swagger.. but he backs it up with great combat and even greater planning. He’s a schemer, a fighter and damn if he isn’t fun to watch.  It also makes me love the reboot version even more. While I already loved him for being played by Jason Mantzokus, being enjoyably dim, while also still enough of a threat to be freaking cool, it’s even cooler knowing he’s still fundamentally the same character. Much like Drake he’s simply been tweaked a bit. For drake it was softening the edges since Ducktales isn’t as broad a show, and neither will the darkwing reboot i’m betting, so his ego and selfishness is sanded down considerably. For Steelbeak it’s giving him an actual origin: Instead of starting at the top of FOWL, he’s starting as a very competent but very wet behind the ears and full of himself agent, working his way up to becoming justifably full of himself like the original show. He has the same swagger and badassery, he’s just not a master planner yet and he’ll get there. Like many of the reboot characters, he’s simply an already great character given some extra depth and rounding out. I love both and can’t wait to see him again next ep and hopefully he’ll show up in the Darkwing reboot so they can go for round 2. 

So with that out of the way, Darkwing naturally interrupts, and cleans house with his gas gun, forcing Steelbeak and his crew to literally go underground into the sewers. This successfully fools drake, and Steelbeak bemoans how both Darkwing and Gizmoduck have been thwarting his plans.. until he gets a great idea; pit them against each other so he can pilfer the comerant while their too busy fighting. It’s a classic supervillain tactic, and one that works perfectly because one of them’s an egotist and a dick and the other is also that but with more style and likeability.  Back at Drake’s place, Gosalyn and Honker are watching a horror movie they clearly aren’t supposed to till Drake and launchpad come back in via their easy chairs flipping them in from Darkwing Tower which is just.. really cool. I like it. I also like that much like the Shakespeare bust in Wayne Manor, Darkwing has his own neat statue to provide acess to his lair... a tiny bronze statue of Basil from the Great Mouse Detective.. I REALLY need to fucking watch that film but it’s a nice nod. But yeah Launchpad brought them back because he feels drake could use a break while Drake refuses to stop because crime never stops and he doesn’t have time for it and your usual self destructive bollocks. It’s interrupted by a knock at the door? 

It’s Fenton! Whose stopped in to see his old buddy launchpad, who is happy to see his old friend and the two catch up, though Drake dosen’t like the interuption because Classic Drake is kind of a grumpus. Fenton naturally is here because Gizmoduck is but says he’s doing a job for the military.. which makes no sense but given Drake doesn’t know what he does and Launchpad dares to be stupid, if not nearly as stupid as his reboot version, no one questions it. When Fenton says he needs to find a hotel Launchpad, being Launchpad, invites him to stay and while Fenton watches the movie with the kids, Drake wants him gone because you know he has a secret identity to keep and a case to work on and they don’t know if they can trust him with it. It’s fair.. but since this is Drake he almost handles it with the subtly of a howitzer. But before he can try to literally throw Fenton out on his ass, a news report comes on about an attack at a local theater and both head off to take care of it.. we also get a nice moment where both react to it with the same words at the same time.  Fenton.. is actually really likeable. He’s a bit awkward, more in that he sort of barges in and makes himself comfy.. but it’s very easy to see from this and the one Ducktales episode of his i’ve seen where the utterly marvelous reboot version gets some traits from: his nervousness, his pluckness, his lack of thinking things through ocasionally when he’s not overthinking them. Fenton is charming. The issue is once he switches on the costume he goes from utterly charming to punchable REALLL quick. I’ll explain my problems with his alter ego in a sec. 

At the theater Steelbeak fakes it to look like Darkwing’s doing the bombing, if half haphazardly and leaves Darkwing with the bomb so when Gizmo shows up he thinks he’s responsible. Darkwing naturally says it wasn’t him, but Gizmo dosen’t buy it and asks if he’s so good how come he wears a mask... says the guy in a helmeted visor’s whose only defense when that’s pointed out is it came with the suit. Which yes is a joke.. but it fails to land and instead of being funny just makes Gizmo look like a hypocritical dick whose assuming someone is evil based on flimsy evidence, and what’s very obviously a setup. it makes him come off as the biggest dumbass alive instead of this world’s superman and that is annoying. More ranting about him in a minute. We do end up getting an incredibly funny bit where the two end up arguing over who gets to defuse a bomb, with both wrestling over it till Gizmoduck takes care of it and both fall into the theater. Gizmoduck tries to arrest Darkwing who ignores him and runs off.  The next day the Mallard family, including Honker naturally, watches Gizmoduck get a parade, a key to the city and other good stuff on the news while Drake sulks before turning it off. And yeah i’ve waited long enough let’s talk about this version of Gizmoduck and why he does not work. I get in theory he’s supposed to be “The Cape”, minus the cape: The big cheese that everyone looks up to and loves to Darkwing’s  dark avenger of the night, a parody of that whose also really dumb. The issue is two fold. The first is .. the classic archtypical cape type chracter has been parodied to hell and back by 2020. He’s been a monster, an asshole and as with here an idiot. And even for then a superman parody, if not in apperance or powers but in treatment, whose really dumb wasn’t very new. 

And you CAN parody a big silver age type hero: Justice League International did so well without being too overt, having most of the team either annoyed or actively hostile to Shazam/Captain Marvel. But it was done well there because well.. billy’s a very corny very earnest and likeable kid in an adult’s body. To us he’s charming and loveable. But to a bunch of actual adults he’d be offputting at best and annoying at worst. While some have been annoyed at how he was handled, I a fan of both JLI and Shazam liked it and thought it was an interesting take. Another REALLY good and REALLY hilarious take on this is from fellow superhero action comedy Danny Phantom, one of my favorites and one I need to revisit. One episode had Danny split himself in two so he could crimefight and have fun with his friends resulting in one self whose a burnt out slacker, and another whose an over the top crimefighter who says things like “you Felonious fiend!” And “This looks like a job for the vacuum cleaner!”. It’s a damn good episode. My point is it’s been better done before and since. 

What doesn’t help is the episode tries to paint it as equal, since Darkwing’s problem in part is Gizmoduck stealing his thunder.. but it doesn’t work. Darkwing is a fully fleshed out character we know and love who despite his huge ego and rampant jackassery, is a decent person whose fought hard for St. Canard, loves his daughter and most damingly... is entertainingly sickish. Gizmoduck’s dickery just makes him come off less likeable and incredibly dense, while Darkwing’s is part of his charm and, along with his ego, has backfired enough to balance it out. Gizmo just doesn’t get comeuppance for his behavior, and instead gets rewarded with a parade, a key to the city, cheerleaders and Gosalyn looking up to him just for having powers in his gadgets. And really his methods aren’t that different from dark wing: While Darkwing is secretive, a loner and uses gadgets.. Gizmoduck’s suit is basically one BIG gadget, and he refuses to see. And I get that’s probably the joke but it just. doesn’t. LAND. It just makes him insufferable. And as far as I can tell in the original show he wasn’t: he was an awkward dork we root for like in the reboot, not a gloryhogging jackass whose squandered his good will long before he gets Darkwing isn’t evil and tries working with him to the point I don’t care by the time that happens: He’s already been so obnoxious it dosen’t make up for it. Maybe later appearances are better but he’s just a chore to watch in costume here. And that’s WITHOUT comparing him to the 2017 version, one of my favorites there, one of the best animated superheroes i’ve seen in a long time, and a toughly likeable character who struggles due to his superhero identity but took it up for exactly the right reasons and wants to help people. Darkwing Gizmoduck thinks he’s the cape and an inspiration when a good guy when he’s worse than the guy he hates at times. Reboot Gizmo is an honest, decent guy who simply wants to help people and use the gizmotech as a way to do that, to help change the world for the better and save the helpless, and only clashes with Darkwing due to his ego and lack of understanding that Gizmoduck and him really aren’t that different. Finally if THIS is why Tad Stones wants them to be different universes, because this Fenton is different from the Ducktales one in personality.. then that’s on HIM. That’s on him for writing this version poorly or letting him get written so poorly and not on the fans who had no reason not to connect a dot. God this character was disappointing and hopefully when I watch more of him at work in Ducktales, he isn’t this obnoxious, nor will he hopefully be in his sequel episodes.  Thankfully moving on Darkwing gets to work, because you know he has experience, and finds Steelbeak trying to pilfer the cormorant but Captain Clueless interrupts and tries to arrest him. The two then finally fight and while it’s sadly short, it’s a fun clash and I genuinely hope the reboot has it’s own fight with them, as given how damn good they are at fight scenes, it’s bound to be even more awesome. But Steelbeak gets away, and uses the comarant’s secret weapon.. a giant fake egg that drops a giant pile of yolk to drown them. Gizmo finally realizes he’s been fighting the wrong guy but our hero's are now running out of time. Darkwing , being the actually capable one here, has Gizmo uses his propeller to beat the eggs and the two head off.. though after a funny bit where Gizmo breaks the Ratcatcher’s sidecar Darkwing lets him use his spare tier, which is huge and likely intended for the main vehicle. Good stuff.  The two get after Steelbeak and while Gizmo makes me pray for death but death won’t come we get a fun battle with Steelbeak including Steelbeak using his beak to bite down and destroy the gas gun. It’s a damn fun bit I must say. But eventually the good guys win, disable the comarant and Darkwing beats Steelbeak. The day is save, FOWL is foiled, our heroes are on shaky but better terms, and Drake and Fenton depart on good if equally shaky terms, before arguing about which of them is better. And we’re out.  Final Thoughts: This.. was a disappointingly mixed bag. Gizmoduck REALLY drug down what was otherwise a good episode with a great concept: Bringing in a hero whose stronger and more popular than Darkwing.. but mostly uses it to make Darkwing look good, which he didn’t need, and make Gizmoduck look REALLY bad, intentionally or otherwise. Steelbeak is a delight and his plan, and the egg trap, are really good, and as mentioned there are enough good set pieces to prevent this from being a terrible episode.. but as an old friend says for me time and time again...

#darkwing duck #drake mallard #gizmoduck #fenton crackshell #fenton crackshell cabrera #launchpad mcquack #steelbeak #gosalyn mallard #honker #tiff of the titans #tad stone

[dragonblobz]

Cell fluff kinda? Wrote this cuz I wanted to write a comfort fic for a friend uwu. I suck at fluff. I'm a natural asshole and this definitely translates to reader in this 😂 have a pregnancy reveal fic with the big beautiful bug bastard

WARNING: PREGNANCY

You pace nervously across the floor of your bedroom, your hands absently already beginning the instinctive rubbing over your belly.

Cell had noticed. The last time you’d been with him, you’d caught him gazing at your belly after you’d removed your shirt. For much longer than any errant gaze should last. Even from him. He hadn’t commented. But you know you’re starting to show just a little bit more than ‘just gaining a little weight’ would ever warrant. You’ll have to tell him.

HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU GONNA TELL HIM????

“Hey boo, sometimes, when you cum in a girl…..” the walls of the empty room ring with your shrill nervous laughter.

“She wants more? YOU always do.” You can HEAR the smirk in his voice.

You squeak and whirl. Of course! Of course the asshole shows up when you could have spilled the beans just from nervously practicing to what you’d thought was your empty home.

“You know, for a guy that squeaks when he walks you sure got in here friggin QUIET.” You’re spluttering and blushing. Here, in this setting, he looks even larger and more like some gorgeous pipe dream than an actual living being.

Cell is still smirking as he rotates his leg slowly, grinding the toe of his foot across your floor. “Carpet.”

Okay. Now’s the time. Just get it over with. Like ripping off a bandaid. You’re babbling inside your own mind. What if he’s angry??? He’s never harmed you in any way that didn’t actually feel GOOD.

He’s standing there, just outside your bedroom doorframe. The tops of his crests are not visible. He’ll have to duck to get in. You giggle again. The nervous sound is shrill and harsh.

The smirk fades and his face becomes blank.

“I’d say leaving your door unlocked is stupid. But then again, trespassing into your home, in particular, would be a far more stupid decision for anyone to make.”

Your mind instantly jumps to the idea of some poor sod walking into your home without your permission and him finding out about it. You suddenly feel like pacing is too much effort.

Cell enters your room then, ducking as expected. The movement is far more graceful than you expected. But, then again, his size and bulk never seems to have an effect on how smoothly and efficiently he can move. You also are well aware that his size doesn’t effect his speed whatsoever as well. The image this particular thought brings to mind, makes your naked toes curl into the carpet.

“I suppose I should just be grateful you don’t smash thru my wall like the fucking koolaid man.” You're babbling now.

He chuckles at this. “Yes. You should be. Very grateful.”

His face slackens again as he rotates his head, slowly assessing your room. You blush as you realize you’ve fucked this guy more times than you can count. Are literally carrying his child. And yet, he’s never been inside your home before.

Cell is beautiful. No doubt about it. But something about the way he observes things, the inhuman twitching of his pupils as they rapidly settle upon and leave each object, as if he’s a living computer, identifying and cataloging each subject. It gives him a loftier, more efficient sort of beauty. You’d love to tell him this. But he’d like that too much.

“Your color scheme….”

“What, purple? I don’t know I just….”

“Lilac.” He cuts you off.

“…. I just like lilac…….. Asshole.”

He turns back to you, crossing his arms and sneering at you. “I hope that you eventually begin to appreciate just how much I allow you to get away with, with that smart mouth of yours.”

Your retort dies before you can utter it. He’s absolutely right. Cell has killed more people than you can even understand. Yet allows some extraordinarily scathing speech and behaviors from yourself roll off his pretty backside like water. No matter what you say, he always shrugs it off or laughs it away. Especially recently. Somehow this makes what you have to tell him seem even MORE difficult.

What if he finally snaps and lashes out? Or worse. You feel a lump form in your throat. What if he doesn’t even CARE? You sit on the edge of your bed, suddenly exhausted and empty feeling. And afraid. “Cell?”

He’s still glaring at you. “Yes, human?”

Shit. He only calls you ‘human’ now when he’s irritated with you. Its actually how you know to stop your crap.

“I need to tell you something. Its important. Like REALLY important.”

He huffs. But his tone is oddly patient. “Go on then. I’m listening.”

You squeeze your eyes closed and wait for oblivion. “I’m pregnant.”

“I know.”

Your eyes snap open and you stare at him dumbly. His face is smooth and unreadable.

“Its yours.” You feel stupid suddenly.

He face stretches into the most incredulous and, quiet frankly, HUMAN expression you’ve ever seen on his face. The he tilts his head and laughs. Hard. As if he’s heard the grandest joke one can ever hear.

You’ve heard him chuckle. A lot. And you’ve heard him laugh a bit too. But never such a boisterous laughter. He’s rocking on his heels. It’s almost carefree. You chest tightens and you fight the urge to cry. Was he laughing because he didn’t care?

“Oh that’s RICH!” He’s actually gasping a bit.

Your body jerks as he freezes. He’s composing himself. But the cessation of movement is so sudden. His body visibly relaxes as he crosses his arms and smirks down at you.

“As if you would desire anyone else.”

You flush. That self centered egotistical……….

“Come to me.” The command is sudden and you’re almost angry at yourself for your body’s own instant compliance. You stand, almost too quickly. You’re dizzy. Or maybe it’s because you’re nervous.

You walk to him.

Every time it’s the same. Every single time. It’s like your body is programmed to ignite a fire deep down in your core every time you are close to his physical person. All retorts and quips are forgotten when you’re this close to him. All fear too. At least of anything or anyone else OTHER than him. It’s just you. And him. And that fire. At least to you.

You would’ve simply continued to stare at his feet. You’re just too nervous to look at him. But he’s having none of that. You feel his finger hook under your chin as he pulls your face up to meet his eyes.

His face is expressionless again. His pupils leaping about, taking in every detail of your face. Piercing. But, then again, his gaze is always piercing. You’re held like this for some time. Long enough to where you begin to feel a little more calm.

“Are you afraid of me?” His question is curious.

You take a moment to think on it. Your eyes flutter to his lips. They’re smooth and unmarred by any expression or blemish.

“No. No I’m not.”

That familiar smirk. “That’s stupid. But not unreasonable. I have been giving you a lot of free reign, after all.”

“You really knew already?”

He scoffs. “Of course I knew. Probably before you yourself knew. Now…. Hold still.”

He releases your chin and you watch as he lowers himself before you. It’s a brand new feeling. Standing before him as he drops to one knee. His eyes haven’t left yours. And he’s every bit as intimidating, even at this angle.

“Remove your shirt.” His voice is now deadly calm.

You feel a clenching of fear. But you comply as you lift and shrug out of the garment, instantly regretting your tendency to not wear a bra when not at home.

His gaze drops to your belly, then. You watch as he raises his large hands to cup your baby bump. One on each side, his long fingers splayed nearly up to your ribcage. You steal a rare moment to appreciate how pretty the dark gem is, nestled between the crests atop his head.

You lose track of time for awhile. He’s just cupping your belly and staring at it intensely. Every so often he shifts his hands and presses and nudges your belly with his fingertips.

“144.”

His sudden speech startles you.

“O…. Okay?”

“It’s heart rate.” His voice is quiet. You feel butterflies twirling in your stomach as you realize what he’s doing.

“Can you tell….”

“Don’t be an imbecile. I’m perfect. Not psychic.” Still quiet.

You cant even begin to be mad. His face shifts upwards to return his gaze to yours.

“Are you well?” His face creases in confusion and you realize you have the biggest most idiotic smile on your face.

“I love you, Cell.”

“I know.” Back to that smirk. He stands again. “Now, is there any other form of comfort you require? Some other assurance that I’m not upset with you, perhaps? Other than my current exemplary behavior? My understanding is that human females require added emotional support due to hormonal changes at this time. Don’t get used to this.”

“Fuck me, maybe?”

His answering smile is a wicked one. “If you think this pathetic structure you call a home can withstand that…. Then I’m happy to oblige.”

#perfect cell #cell #dbz #pregnancy #my writing

[jawritter]

30 minutes til midnight....

Happy Birthday Dean pt. 2

A/n: whew this one took on a life of its own for me, hope you guys enjoy it! As always all mistakes are mine! If you want to be added to my tag list just let me know! Feedback welcome!!

**Warning** Smut, unprotected sex, language, angst, mean reader, heartbroken Dean. That’s about it I think...

Pairing: Dean x Reader eventually, Mentions of Sam x reader.

Word count: around 3970

Cross-posted on Wattpad.

Part 1! In case you missed it!!

You'd been sitting looking at your phone since you hung it up. Dean's deep rumble still ringing in your head. It was now a little before 1:30 am on Dean's birthday. You convinced yourself though, that it was just because you wanted to make sure the boys got home safe. Dean did say that they were only an hour out... It would only be right to wait up for them. Right?

You could almost hear your Uncle Bobby yell bullshit Y/N from the other side, and much as you didn't like to admit it, it made you smile. You missed that old man, especially on nights like this, when you stupidly let yourself get all in your feelings, and get yourself all wound up. He always seemed to know the right thing to say, just what you needed to hear to make your heart stop feeling like it weighs 200 lbs. 

Still, Uncle Bobby isn't here, and you got yourself in this mess, and now you're going to have to figure out what to do about it. 

You wouldn't believe how deep in denial you were in before tonight. Now though, now that it was out in the open of your attention span, it was like you just couldn't see around it to focus on anything else. 

Getting up to go and make another pot of coffee, and possibly spike it because you weren't even remotely tired, you staggered into the kitchen of the bunker. It was dark, and cold, and lonely. Much like your whole life seemed to have been. 

"Fitting," you thought to yourself as you put the coffee grounds into the pot and turned it on. 

That had been the majority of your life, cold and lonely. The thought of what it might feel like to have Dean's arms wrapped around you, warming you in a way you'd never been warmed before slipped past your fifty-foot thick walls into your subconscious. 

Thinking of Dean that way was something you had never allowed yourself to do before, but here you were, standing in the middle of a cold, dark kitchen of a decades-old building alone. Picturing yourself melting into the arms of the Adonis that was Dean Winchester. His thick strong biceps flexing as the wrap up around you. The tense of his upper arms as he pulled you impossibly gently into his tick, strong chest. Shoulders slightly hunched, holding you close.....

"Stop it Y/N!" you mentally slapped yourself hard enough to derail that train of thought before you could get carried away any further. 

Pouring the hot liquid into the cup you had waiting on the counter, you watched as the steam of the warm drink drifted up into the cold room. Sitting in the coffee pot back down, completely wrapping your hands around the cup, so wrapped up in the fact that you had zero fucking clue what to do with these newly discovered feelings you had for the eldest Winchester that you didn't even realize you had an audience. 

Turning around you walked face to mid-chest into Sam Winchester... 

"OOOF," was all you could say at first. Trying to get your rapidly speeding heart rate to slow down. "Jesus fucking Christ Sam! Warn a girl you standing behind her!" 

Sam laughed a little, sitting down his bag on the floor. 

"Well we yelled when we came in like you do, but you didn't say anything. So I thought were in bed. I just walked in when you ran into me." he said, sitting down at the table and patting the seat across from him so that you would join him.

You took your seat silently, you had a feeling you knew what was coming.

"So, you wanna tell me the real reason you called my brother's phone to 'check-in' tonight instead of calling mine like you usually do? 'Cause we both know you've never even called Dean to tell him to pick up something on a supply run, you have me text him. Spill Y/N, what's wrong? Dean broke every speed law in Kansas and the surrounding states to get here because you scared the fuck out of him." Sam said, watching you like a detective looking at a criminal at the other end of a questioning stand. You seriously felt like you were on trial right now...

"Sam, it was a mistake, I dialed the wrong number, it's late and I'm tired," you said, standing up with your coffee in your hand, planning to make a quick exit before this conversation could get any more incriminating on your end. 

"Bullshit Y/N. That's bullshit, and you and I both know that it is. We've been friends since you walked into our lives. You owe me the truth. That's my brother in there. My brother who you've been a total ass to since we stepped foot into your Uncle Bobbies that day all those years ago. You've made cracks at his ego, you walk around like his very presents disgust you, you kick him when he's down, or more hurtful than anything you act like he doesn't even exist." Sams's face was hard as stone, and that scared the fuck out of you, Sam had never talked to you this way. 

"Sam, I don't understand what your talking about. Dean hates the very air I breathe. He doesn't care whether or not I ignore him, or whether I insulted him. I'm just another mouth to feed, just another burden he has to take on to raise. Nothing more. Hell, I'm not even considered a friend!!" you say, feeling your temper getting the best of you, and you didn't want to yell at your best friend. Sam and yourself had never gotten in a fight. You didn't want to start now.

"I know you're smarter than that Y/N, I know your not that fucking blind!" Sam whisper yelled, slamming his big hand down on the table, making you jump. In an instant, he was in your face, looming down at you over the table. 

"Listen to me, and you better let this sink in because I won’t say it again, and If Dean knew I was talking about this to someone who hates him he'd be humiliated, and embarrassed beyond forgiving me. Dean walks around with this overly strong, man's man personality. Like nothing can hurt him, nothing can touch him, but he fucking hurts too! For years now you've pushed him away to the point that he walks around like he doesn't like you because he's trying to hide the fact that you're hurting his feelings. Feelings he likes to pretend he doesn't have to protect himself! Protect himself from people like you! Dean's been in love with you from the moment he met you, and you never even gave him a chance! The first thing you ever did was insult him about the shirt he was wearing being wrinkled! For the first time in his life, he started to iron his clothes before getting dressed in the morning! Then when he was standing in your way in the kitchen in Bobby’s, you accused him of being an egotistical dick, and shoved him out of your way!” Sam took a deep breath, attempting to calm himself down. 

“I gave you the benefit of the doubt because Dean doesn’t exactly have a great reputation with women, and I’m sure living with hunters you’ve heard the stories, so I just overlooked it, even though I’ve never liked it. Now though, when you called his phone tonight, he tried to hide it, but for a moment his face lit up. When you told him that you were just checking in and called the wrong phone, you should have seen the heartbreak. He even admitted to me that he thought you were calling to tell him happy birthday Y/N!!!!” 

You sat there in stunned silence, your mouth hanging open silently. You didn’t see that coming. 

You had called him to say happy birthday, and chickened out… Shit…. Your brain just couldn’t compute what it was hearing, and you just sat there staring into the angry face of Sam Winchester. Literally feeling like you’d been punched in the gut. Like the floor dropped out of your whole world. 

Dean was in love with you? How did you never see it?

“S…. Sam…. I really didn’t know….. I…. I was going to wish him a happy birthday, but I chickened out,...... I thought Dean hated me… I thought he… fuck I never saw it…. I didn’t know!” 

Sam raised his hand to silence you.

Well, you better figure it out, because Dean doesn’t deserve the way your treating him, and I for one am tired of watching it. So I’m only going to say this one time. Don’t fuck with my brother’s emotions, or Bobby’s niece or not you will be looking for somewhere else to live, and don’t you dare get his hopes up just because you feel sorry for him. If you start something with Dean Y/N you better mean it, because I will…..” 

Balling his fist up he walks away out of the kitchen, down the hall to his room where you heard the door slam. Tears falling freely down your face. 

You didn’t know what hurt more. The fact that you had hurt Dean, the fact that Dean had been in love with you for years, or the fact that you were in love with him, and to damn stubborn and stupid to know it. 

You couldn’t leave it like this, and you couldn’t stand the thought that you had hurt Dean. So you stood up slowly, resolving in yourself that you were going to handle this like an adult. You were going to face your feelings for Dean, and if he rejects you, as he rightfully should probably. You were going to deal. ‘Cause after the way you treated Dean all these years, you deserve nothing less. 

Letting your feet carry you down the hallway to Dean’s room you stood outside the door, you couldn’t hear anything, but you knew that Dean wasn’t asleep. He never went to sleep directly after a hunt. Usually, he had to drink himself there…

Raising your hand slowly you knocked lightly on the door. Your resolve already weakening. Fear gripping you whether you want to admit it or not.

You could have sworn your heart stopped beating when you heard the door open and saw Dean standing there looking at you. He looked tired, which he usually did after a hunt. His eyes traveled you up and down in disbelief you were really standing before him, and that alone stung. The fact that you had been suck an ass to him, that he was shocked you knocked on his door when you lived in the same house burned deeper than you wanted to admit to anyone. Even yourself. Especially yourself. 

“Y/N? Is everything okay?” he asked, not really knowing how to even talk to you, now that it was pointed out to you it was all you could see. You mentally kicked yourself in the ass for what you had done to him.

“Hey, nothing wrong, mind if I come in?” you asked, and he backed up cautiously, letting you into his space. The one room in the bunker that you had never been in before. 

It was very military, very little life to it all. It was cleaner than you would have expected it to be. Weapons lining the walls. A picture of his mother and Sammy along with John from all those years ago on the nightstand, then there was another picture, one you didn’t expect to see there, and one Dean scampered to put it face down before you could see it, he was too late though… 

A picture of you sat in the picture frame, one he’d obviously snuck and took when you were doing research unaware…. Fuck..

You had to bite your lips to keep the tears from falling, Dean was watching you quietly, you could see now that what you had mistaken for being a jerk, was really Dean being nervous.

How have you been so blind for so long?

“Dean,” you say, taking a tentative step forward. He took one back. Like a hurt animal, and you got to close. You took a deep breath, looking at him, trying to figure out where to go from here, what to say. Is there even a way to fix this? Have you let it go too far? 

“Dean,” you try again. “Dean, can we talk? There’s something I need to say….” 

Dean sat down on the foot of his bed and looked at you quietly. You knew you were going to have to choose your words wisely. If you didn’t you were going to lose him for good, you could see it now. 

“Okay, shoot…” he said, looking you up and down suspiciously. Guarded. You recognized those walls because you normally wore them pretty high as well…

Making your way over to where he was sitting you sat down next to him slowly. His face was almost comical as he looked at you, sort of like his eyes were about to bulge out of his skull from the shock. 

Reaching over you deliberately grabbed his hand in yours, kind of like if you had your hands on him, he couldn’t run. Stupid logic yes, but when your as scared as you were right now, you wanted comfort. His comfort, even though you didn’t deserve it. 

“Dean, I’m so, so sorry,” you say quietly, looking deep into his breathtaking olive-green eyes. Eyes you felt like you were looking into for the first time. They were as deep as oceans, and you wanted more than anything to drown in them.

His plump pink lips parted slightly in shock, man you wanted to kiss those lips. Now that you have realized how bad you want this man, it’s almost a need…

“I have done nothing since the day I met you but be a total bitch to you, and it took me until tonight to admit and see it, and I’m so, so sorry. I was afraid of the way you made me feel Dean, so I was using insults and things to subconsciously push you away ...”

Reaching up you wipe a stray tear away that slipped past your defenses, you didn’t even care anymore that Dean saw it. 

Dean on the other hand just sat there and watched as one by one your walls started to crumble… Walls he didn’t even realize you had. Walls that looked so familiar to himself, because he had been hiding behind the same walls.

“I know there’s really no way to apologize for years of me being a total bitch. Not really; but I wanted you to know. Tonight I didn’t call your phone by accident…”

Standing up from the bed and turning his back to you, you barely heard his voice that wasn’t even a whisper….

“Why did Sammy tell you…. He said he wouldn’t tell you…”

Feeling like you were instantly fucked and screwed this up you started to panic. So you jumped off the bed, and grabbed his arm, he turned around harshly. A single tear streaming down his perfectly chiseled, Godlike face. 

“Dean, Sam has nothing to do with this, I’m glad he told me. Please just let me explain!” you half yelled at him, he stood silently, you couldn’t tell whether he was angry, or not…

Stone. The face Dean had perfected over the years of trying to protect his emotions.

“I was sitting on the bed logging onto my laptop to watch Netflix like I do every night, and I noticed the date. It was 30 minutes until midnight… In 30 more minutes, it would be your birthday, when I saw it; your face was all I could see Dean.  I remember thinking ‘if he lives for 30 more minutes he will have made it 41 years.’ I started to think about how rare that was in the life that we lived in. I started to think about how just in 30 minutes I could get a phone call that a hunt had gone to shit, or how some monster had finally gotten. Then I started to think about a world that you weren’t in.. I never realized it, Dean, I swear, but at that moment I realized I didn’t want to live in a world that you weren’t a part of…” 

You took a step closer to him, stealing yourself for the inevitable rejection, but you just had to get this off your chest. Regardless of the consequences. This time he didn’t step back. He stood still. 

“All these years I’ve been such a fucking idiot Dean, I don’t hate you, I loved you, Dean, I love you so fucking much, and I’m so afraid of it that I built up these stupid walls, and made fun of you and tried to hurt you and push you away because I am a fucking worthless coward… I’m so sorry Dean. I’ll never be able to say it enough. I know you probably don’t feel the same way, I don’t blame you if you hate me now, you have every right to, but I will spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you…” 

You stood there in silence now with battered breath. The air between the two of you thick with tension… You couldn’t take it anymore. The silence hurt worse than the rejection you had prepared yourself for. You turned to leave. 

You felt his hand reach out and grab your arm, much like you did his. Stopping you in your tracks. You turned on your heels to face your punishment. Dean could be cruel when he wanted to be, and you deserve that and more.

Instead of mean words, or hatred, you saw something you hadn’t expected. Tears. Flowing freely down his face. 

“De….” 

His lips landed on yours in a heavy kiss. Bruising almost. Like everything he’d pent up all these years, everything he wanted to say and couldn’t hold back anymore, because Dean was never good with words, was put into this kiss. Taking you by complete surprise.

It took you a moment, but not long to catch up, His lips were rougher than you expected but still soft. Dominating, demanding…. You felt his tongue trace over your bottom lip, asking for entrance that gladly granted him. 

His tongue quickly dominated your mouth. His taste filling you, whiskey and spearmint gum, and something that was just uniquely Dean… His cologne intoxicating you. Kissing you literally drunk.

When he finally pulled away you bother were panting. 

No words were spoken. You just stood there looking at each other for a moment. He said everything that needed to be said without saying a word. Dean was good at that.

Dean’s arms wrapped around yours. Strong, Powerful, everything you had imagined they would be. Pulling your body flush against his chest. His lips leaving little butterfly kisses on the corner of your mouth and down your jawline. To the spot behind your ear, you didn’t even know were there before his teeth pulled lightly against your ear lobe. A shiver ran down the course of your body. 

His hands felt like they were everywhere all at once. Making their way up to your oversized shirt, grabbing your bar breast in his powerful calloused hand. Massashing it lightly. Twisting your nipple that was standing on end between his thumb and index finger. Drawing a moan out of you both. 

Dean quickly started to back you both up to the bed that thankfully wasn’t that far away, letting you fall back softly when the back of your knees hit the mattress. You backed up the bed making quick work at removing your shirt, shorts and favorite underwear while you watched him rid himself of his layers quickly. His eyes ever leaving yours. Emotions so thick in his eyes that he looked like he might cry again…

Crawling over you with his perfectly sculpted body, He stopped just long enough swirl his tongue around each of your nipples. Making your arch into him. His hand tracing up your side while his other hand traced it’s way up to your thigh. Meeting your already dripping core. Your body literally aching for him. Finally letting you feel what you should have been feeling all those years. Passion burning hot as fire in your veins. Want, no need, Drawing you lips to his again as he slipped two of his thick fingers inside you, while his thumb made delicious circles over your swollen clit. His tongue finding places in your mouth you didn’t know existed. 

You could feel his swollen length throbbing against your inner thigh as he rocked himself against your skin. Desperate for friction he so desperately needed. 

You reached for him, but he pushed your hand away from you, his thick voice making you shiver underneath him 

“Not tonight sweetheart, I can’t last if you touch me like that….”

He ran his tongue lightly over the shell of your ear again as the coil in your belly tightened to a painful point. Ready to snap as white-hot pleasure threatened to take you over.

“Dean, I’m gonna….” 

You couldn’t finish as your eyes rolled, a gasp escaped you as he pick up the pace of his hand.

“I know baby, let go…” 

Just like that, you fell to pieces, your body jerking underneath him as he worked you through your high. Wave after wave of sheer bliss rolling through your veins. His lips finding yours once again. 

Kissing you lightly while he lined up his thick length with your soaking core..

“Your so beautiful Y/N… You have no idea how long I’ve wanted you this way…” He said. His thick voice barely above a whisper as his hooded eyes searched yours… Bring your lips to his again softly in a chaste kiss he didn’t let you respond as he slowly pushed his way into you, making you gasp at his girth and length. He was more than you could have ever imagined he’d be.

When he finally bottomed out he stilled inside of you, kissing you softly, lovingly until you nodded at him. Letting you know you were ready for him to move..

Over and over again he pushed and pulled himself into you, each drag of his tick length against your walls, hitting spot deep down inside of you that you didn’t know existed. His pace quickened as you both became a moaning, grunting mess. The sounds of skin on skin filling the room as he was now driving into you with a desperation that you couldn’t describe. 

“Not gonna last long…,” he said between pants, his thrust being to break their steady rhythm.

You couldn’t respond, only moan his name louder as you were pushed over the edge again. He did his best to work you through your high before spilling deep inside of you. Something between a cry and a whine leaving his perfect lips that were buried against your neck. Kissing you as he finally stops twitching inside of you, giving you everything he had to give. 

Brushing your hair behind your ear he looked deep into you y/e/c eyes, stealing your breath away again with just a look. Still buried deep down inside of you…

“Y/n I love you…” He whispered. His eyes searching yours.

“I love you to Dean, Happy birthday….”

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