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grollow · 11 months

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Uh hi, hello there! Sorry to bother but you're the only person I can ask this since your username is named after the ship (that and I've seen your works around and seen you mentioned by countless artists/writers so to me, you're like a higher being in HK Community so by default, you have most answers)

So why's Grollow such a popular ship? I've seen like 10 fanarts of it passed by my dashboard every time I'm here. Can you tell me what's going on rn? Is an event going on with this ship? Was there a confirmation from Team Cherry these two had a thing? Is this HK people's way of coping while they wait for Silksong? All fanfic/arts of it is amazing, don't get me wrong but I've recently got into HK so I'm not sure if I like it yet nor even any ships at all in general besides canon plus that hc of Grimm and Radi being twins makes me confused on why Hollow would be with somebody who's sister tormented them for so long. Makes it so overwhelming, you know?

Sorry if this offends you in any way. I don't mean to do that. I just want to know what's been going on and why's it so popular is all. Again apologies for being rude if I am

Hi Anon!

Gotta admit, this is the first time someone’s ever called me a Higher Being in anything, hahaha. Especially since I’m not only not the origin of this ship (I got the username from my sweet friend @sundimus who let me have it) and I’m also relatively new to the fandom. I think I’m just very loudly outspoken. I don’t usually get into ship discourse, but this sounds like it’s coming from a place with good intentions, so I’ll reply to you with my genuine opinions!

So before I go into explaining why I like Grollow, I will preface with this answer: shipping is a highly subjective topic. In any fandom, bluntly. Sometimes people pick “I like these two because they have similar names” and sometimes people go “I like them because I think they’d be pretty together” etc. Shipping in every single fandom will always be based in large on people’s own personal headcanons and aesthetics. And for everyone who picks a ship not explicitly confirmed in canon, it’s for whatever reason they want, and for the most part I am very ‘ship and let ship’ while avoiding whatever I personally am not interested in.

(FTR, I also think this is an attitude most people should adopt. You don’t have to like what I like. I don’t have to like what you like. What you write or draw is absolutely none of my business. You like sparkle? Draw sparkle.)

Toward that end, I am not here to convince you to like Grollow, nor am I here to imply that disliking it is wrong. It is not a canon ship. There is nothing in canon to indicate that Grimm and Hollow have ever met. It’s not confirmed by Team Cherry, and I don’t think shipping is a ‘coping’ mechanism for waiting for Silksong. I think why people ship things vary anywhere from ‘they’d be cute’ to ‘I saw artwork I liked of them’ to ‘this particular fanfic’s dynamics made me love them.’ And that’s true for ANY non canon pairing! And all of them are valid reasons. Hell “I ship this because my friend does” is even valid. Shipping is such a subjective thing that people can and should do what makes them happy and stay in their own lane, really.

I’m a big fan of the old fandom term ‘YMMV’ (Your mileage may vary). There are some ships I really don’t like. There are some I straight up do not understand. And there are others, like Grollow, that I stand in the corner yelling from the rooftop about. As long as ship is tagged correctly, I am very “if you see something you don’t like but it was tagged, that’s on you. The blacklist exists for a reason.”

Sorry if this kinda sounds a little mean, I don’t intend it to. I just see a lot of people being shamed for liking pairings (And I have personally been shamed for liking Grollow – not by you, but there’s been a few anons I’ve ignored) and I don’t agree with, or support that. I want to make that clear.

So with all that out of the way, time to talk about my * favorites * ~

There are a LOT of reasons that I think Grimm and Hollow work. To start with the most superficial one: they are palette matches. Grimm’s color schemes are red and black, Hollow’s are pale blue and white. They complement each other very well. They also have similar movesets canonically. Ever seen the video from Fireb0rn of the mod where they’re fighting together in the Colosseum? Where their AI practically works together? It’s delightful. It’s undoubtedly unintentional by the developers, but it’s absolutely wonderful and gives me life.

From a lore reason, I will say that I have not, and will never, headcanoned Hollow as the type to blame Grimm for something that his sister (Bc I also subscribe to “they’re siblings your honor”) did. My personal headcanons aside for Hollow, blaming Grimm for the Radiance is something that seems wildly unfair – and since Hollow is a blorbo that is mostly a blank slate in canon, I say they’d never do that.

(I’d like to point out though – so many people ship them with moth OCs. The same argument could be made there. If they’d blame Grimm for Radi, why not her moths who are indirectly responsible for her never dying properly? The answer is because none of us want to believe Hollow is the type to hold a grudge over that against uninvolved people.)

Grimm is literally the antithesis to both the Radiance and to the Pale King in terms of what he stands for. They run from and fear death to varying degrees. Grimm embraces it. He welcomes it. From death he is reborn, and so instead of running from it, he runs towards it. He’s a Higher Being who directly involves himself with mortals instead of staying aloof. He uses a mortal vessel (just like the vessels were created to hold Radi, his own are created to hold him) but everything in canon suggests that, at the very least, this is an agreement, not forced. You CAN argue that he’s forcing Grimmchild into this ritual and that it’s bad – Brumm/the Banishment ending certainly implies that – but I’ve never subscribed to it because every other character’s dialogue disagrees with that. I’ve personally always took it to be ‘Grimmchild and Grimm 100% agree to this.’

In this regard: They are cinematic foils. Grimm, who dies to be reborn, a willing vessel for the Nightmare flame, who chooses this existence. Hollow, who cannot die despite trying, a ‘willing’ (if very heavily forced into it) vessel for the Radiance, who clearly does not want this existence and is doing it out of a sense of duty—to their father, to Hallownest, to whatever motivation you decide to chose for Hollow here.

Canon is very loosey-goosey in personalities. The beauty of environmental storytelling is that we can fill in a lot. And as the above: I’ve filled in that they are foils. That’s where my mind took it.

So how do these people who are veritable opposites meet, how can they become romantically attached?

I took one look at the Radiance and went ‘abusive.’ I have my own interpretations of her, but the easiest explanation without this becoming entirely about her is one of Grimm’s lines from my own fanfic: “Those with similar scars recognize them in others.” [1]

Abusers are people first and foremost. The Radiance, in my headcanons, is very abusive to everyone in her life. That includes Grimm. I do not see them as loving siblings, because her nature is very self-absorbed; she clearly, canonically, does not see other peoples emotions. Do I think she intended to hurt Grimm? Probably not. But I do believe that she was abusive, because someone who was willing to wipe out Hallownest to try and maintain control would not simply be that way overnight, and only at one specific enemy. People like that… they’re like that to everyone. It’s not an if they abuse you. It’s a when they do it.

Starting to see where I’m going with this? I believe that the Radiance was cruel to Grimm – and that he’d see very similar traits to himself in Hollow.

I also believe that if you headcanon that Hollow can dream – before, after, during the imprisonment – there’s no way in hell they did not have Nightmares. The most common interpretation in fandom is after imprisonment with the belief that the seals would’ve kept Grimm out (a theory I subscribe to) but it’s clear that Hollow could dream when Radi was sealed within them. For this ship to work, most people say that they can continue to dream after. And nightmares would naturally bring them to Grimm’s realm. I personally subscribe to the belief that he would absolutely interfere to help them, because as I said: I believe he has similar scars, and he’d want to help.

A very common fandom interpretation is ‘Hollow is afraid of Grimm’ and I think that’s very valid. They probably would be at first. He’s a dream god. That’s frightening to them after what they’ve been through. For this ship to work, both of them have to be willing to work through that. Which circles to my next point of: this ship only ever works if its written with them becoming friends first. Friendship based on patience, understanding, and respect, as well as healing. Hollow straight out of the egg, in my opinion, ain’t crawlin’ into anyone’s bed. You’d be lucky if they even wanted to crawl into their own. Pretty sure they just want to sit and remain still until a new order comes. Poor traumatized thing. In every interpretation of this pairing that I’ve liked, Grimm has been working with Hollow to work through their pain, from a place of genuine understanding and empathy from what they’ve experienced. [2]

As for how this friendship becomes ship? The Author Is Demi, my friend, and I headcanon both of them to be as well. Any good romantic relationship should, in my opinion, have a very strong foundation based in friendship, in genuine fondness for one another. And it is COMPLETELY OKAY to leave their relationship here, if you’re ‘hey I support aroace’ or even just think that’s all that it needs to be. But me? I’ve always looked at Hollow as someone who loves too much, loves too deeply, pours their whole heart into something. It’s a hard heart, riddled with scars, from people who have mistreated it throughout their life, but their base nature is someone who does nothing halfway. You get everything or you get nothing.

So of course I headcanon them as a romantic, who wants someone to love and accept them unconditionally, who wants someone who sees their scars and rather than wanting to fix them, wants to complement them. Of course I headcanon them as someone who, below their façade of feeling nothing, wants to be complete, wants to belong, and wants to be good enough when all their life, they’ve been told that what they are is wrong, isn’t okay, isn’t right. And Grimm, who is old enough to understand that and may even have similar history depending on how he’s written, is perfectly suited to do all of those things. To be that person. Because, personally? I believe he wants all the same things. Someone to accept him as he is. Someone who is not afraid of death. Someone who isn’t intimidated by the Ritual. Someone who will stay.

In short: They’re cute, your honor.

At the end of the day, it’s all about what you think fits with the characters. Some people write them as never getting along. Some people write them as just friends. Some people write them as straight enemies. Since they never meet in canon, it’s an open sandbox. This is the castle I’m choosing to build. You can, and should, build whatever one you like.

Obligatory: queer platonic relationships are ALSO valid, if you wanna take that spin on it. My q key is being a jerk to me so I was avoiding that word in this massive reply dskdksgj but it's still very valid

But if my soap box has brought you onto team Grollow, or at least opened your mind to the possibility, I’d be happy to recommend some of my favorite fics. If it hasn’t, I hope I’ve at least clarified things for you, anon. Thanks for your question!

[1] White and Gray, chapter 33: The Last Laugh is Mine

[2] Yes, I know, my most popular Grollow fic doesn’t wildly play with this. Shades of Black does. Living Dead was more ‘for fun,’ less ‘I feel the need to explain this ship.’

#asks: answered #anon #headcanons #long post #grollow #grimmxhollow #character analysis #ship stuff #<- guy who really needs to write shades of black #grollow thesis #<- basil said i have to add this tag #cw: references to abuse

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jtargaryen18 · 2 years

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Barber & Weiss ~ Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Series Masterlist

Words: 4.7K

Pairing: Dark Andy Barber x Dark Mike Weiss x Reader

Warnings: Expletive use. References to drug dealing, drug use, and embezzlement. Dubious consent, mild coercion, sexual blackmail, contract for sex as repayment, theft. Explicit sexual content to include face-sitting and double penetration.

Disclaimer: The author of this work claims no ownership of characters aside from the reader, and original secondary characters mentioned. This work is not intended for those under the age of 18 due to explicit sexual content and darker themes. By reading this work or any works on my blog (jtargaryen18), you agree that you are at least 18 years of age. I do not consent to have my work hosted on any third party app or site. If you are seeing this fanfiction anywhere but archiveofourown and tumblr, it has been reposted without my permission.

Summary: You run the office at Barber & Weiss and love your job and employers. When your drug-dealing boyfriend gets in trouble with a loan shark, you’re hesitant to embezzle money from the law firm to bail him out. But he promises you he’ll be able to return the money quickly, before someone notices it’s gone. What’s going to happen to you when your boyfriend is arrested and your bosses know about your theft?

~~~*~~~*~~~

The day your firm won the Fields’ case was cause for celebration.

The three of you had spent many nights at Andy’s house working long hours on that case, going over endless possibilities and theories. Mike could unearth anything anyone tried to keep hidden with uncanny precision. Last week he had brought a huge dry-erase board over to Andy’s house, marking it up with your combined ideas.

Andy didn’t seem to mind that. He got into it. Did it bother him Mike ended up shirtless in those suspenders he loved so much?

It did. Oh, you could tell. Eventually, it was time for each evening to end. You stayed there with Andy, and neither you nor Mike missed the smirk he wore as he watched his partner leave each night.

Yeah, there was some underlying tension there as the weeks passed.

As the court dates approached, the three of you spent a lot of time together working on that vital case there in Andy’s home. The evening usually ended the same way. The three of you in the guest room. In the living room. In the kitchen. One night they laid you out on Andy’s dining room table like a buffet, tormented and fucked you until you were dozing. You slept through someone carrying you to bed, slept through to the next morning.

It was a tired you’d grown accustomed to. You yawned there at your desk, waiting for them to get back. You probably could have learned the verdict of the case on social media. But you couldn’t fool either of them. Especially, Andy. They’d know if your reaction to the verdict wasn’t genuine and you didn’t want to disappoint them.

Mike strutted into the office first that evening and you grinned. Andy followed him, barely holding back a smile and confirming your suspicions.

“You won?” you asked excitedly.

“We won,” Andy told you, grinning.

Running out from behind the desk, you gave each of them a hug. You had to keep it polite because there were others in the office. A couple of secretaries, various interns. It was the reason all three of you made an effort not to act any differently than you had before your private arrangement.

It was almost the end of the day. All of you who worked for the firm gathered as the two of them went over the verdict and the likely sentencing. They thanked you all for your efforts and told you all to go home early.

When you caught Andy’s eye, thinking to go back to your desk, he winked at you. “That goes for you too.”

Really?

You went back around your desk to get your things. Andy followed you.

“We’ll be right behind you,” he said low in your ear. Then he pressed a credit card into your hand. “Order takeout. Anything you want. We’re celebrating tonight.”

You smiled, nodded. “Thank you.”

You left with the others, getting in your car, and headed first for the store to get some things you were aware you needed. Your mind was on what would make a good dinner tonight. Winning the case was special.

In the last few weeks since your arrangement began, you were learning a lot about your bosses. Mike loved spicy food, lighter and healthier dishes. Then he indulged in expensive scotch. Andy favored decadent dishes, rich in flavor and heavier. His poison was good whiskey, particularly fine bourbon.

When it came to sex? You grinned to yourself as you thought about their individual preferences there.

Your younger boss was up for anything all the time. He enjoyed tormenting you with his mouth and hands until you were incoherent mess and then he’d fuck you. Mike loved pushing you to the edge until you were in tears, until you were so eager for the release he withheld from you that you’d beg him to let you come. And if you tried to get Andy to intercede for you, he’d get Andy to hold you down and torture you even more.

Andy was a little older and more romantic. It was important to him to set the mood. Even on crazy busy nights when you were all sorting through notes, trying to find a new angle on the case, it was the little things Andy did. He’d sit next to you on the couch, pull your feet into his lap to massage them and he was so good at that. When he knew you were tired from a long day at the office, or from their attentions the night before, he’d serve you dinner or run you a bath. Andy enjoyed sex as much as any man, but he appreciated intimacy. And he had the advantage of having you live in his home. No matter how the evening went, if Andy was there, you felt taken care of, safe.

More than once you felt grateful that it was a temporary arrangement and that feelings weren’t involved. How would a woman ever choose between the two gorgeous men?

As you got back into your car, some ideas came to you. You were so caught up in coming up with a celebratory dinner, that you weren’t as aware of your surroundings as you should have been.

There was a wonderful Spanish restaurant that Andy talked about, but you’d never been there. The staff were so friendly. All you’d had to do was drop Andy’s name and they helped you put together a dinner of sumptuous, exotic Catalan coast seafood. They’d even sold you white wine that they recommended with the meal. Oh, it cost a fortune but from what they told you it was light and flavorful which would make Mike happy. But it was upscale and from one of Andy’s favorite restaurants.

In short, you were pretty damn proud of yourself.

It wasn’t until you’d pulled up in the driveway with everything that you felt it. You felt like someone was watching you.

Before it could occur to you to be nervous about that, Andy pulled in behind you with Mike next to him in his Audi. They were talking away in there, no doubt still preening about the case. Everything else was forgotten as you climbed out of your car, running around to the other side to grab dinner.

Strong arms came around, grabbing the larger bags. Andy snuck a kiss before letting you get the rest.

“I love your idea for dinner,” he told you. That smile had your heart racing. You loved making Andy happy. Of the two of them, he was always harder to impress.

“I was hoping so,” you told them, smiling.

Mike led the way, opening the door and disabling the alarm system. The case was all they could talk about as you all headed for the kitchen, working together to get dinner unpacked and served up. Mike was quick to get into the wine, encouraging you to drink up as you helped get everything plated.

Over dinner, they told you how everything went leading up to the verdict. Both were pretty proud of themselves, and they deserved to be. You’d all been working on the case for months.

“With this we should be able to get bigger cases,” Mike mused as the three of you got seated at the dining room table. “This is next level.”

Andy cocked a brow at him. He was always the realist, but he was having a trouble keeping a smile from his lips at the thought. “Maybe so,” he said after a moment.

“We can take on other cases that matter,” Mike pointed out. “We’ve got a winning team.”

You had to agree with that. Each of them was good lawyers but together? They were a pretty formidable force in the courtroom.

You raised your glass to them. “The best team I’ve ever worked for.”

They cut each other a look and you quickly took a drink. You’d meant it. Or did they think you only said it because of the arrangement?

Andy shook his head. “You’re part of this team. You put in as many hours as we did on the Fields case. Not sure we could have pulled it off without you.”

You had to laugh. “I’m not a brilliant lawyer like the two of you. If I was able to help, I’ll take that.”

“You’re still important to us,” Mike told you, charming you with a grin.

By the time you’d finished eating, you were all a couple of glasses of wine in, which was plenty for you. Still, you gathered the dishes and tried to clean up. You’d just put your own plate in the sink when someone pressed into you from behind and carefully took it from your hands and placed it in the sink.

Heated kisses pressed into the side of your neck. Something else that was heated pressed into your lower back.

“Leave them,” Mike purred into your ear.

Andy had said you were all celebrating tonight. What did they have in mind for you?

When Mike ground himself into you, you shivered. All their attentions over the last few weeks had you conditioned to their touch. There were times in the office when one of them winked at you passing by your desk and you turned into a needy puddle in your chair.

What had you become?

Normally, this was the part where they took this to Andy’s guest room unless one or both of them were too impatient. But something felt different tonight, you just couldn’t put your finger on it.

Mike’s hands slid up your waist, sliding over your breasts as he continued to layer kisses down your neck. Your thighs clenched in anticipation, you just couldn’t help it.

When Mike scooped you up to carry bridal style, you licked your lips to watch Andy loosen his tie and pull it free from his shirt. He followed Mike who carried you back into the living room where Andy had built a nice fire in the fireplace. It was cooler this evening, the chill of fall in the air.

When Andy went to pull the drapes closed, you knew they meant to stay there. It wasn’t the first time. But the coffee table had been moved and a comforter had been put down in front of the fire.

Carefully lowering you onto it, you shivered at the warmth from the cheery blaze in front of you. From the hunger in two sets of blue eyes on you.

What were they up to?

“Hang on,” Mike told you, dashing out of the room.

Andy toed off his shoes and sat next to you on the comforter. His smile did things to your insides as he toyed with the strap of your dress shoes, careful in removing it. Then he removed the other, pressing a kiss to your knee as he did.

As his hands smoothed up your calves, fingertips just skimming under the hem of your skirt, Mike returned with the unopened bottle of wine in an ice-filled bucket. There were three fresh glasses in his hand.

“You’re trying to get me drunk,” you teased them. “Is that it?”

“No.” Andy crawled closer, a long arm reaching behind you to unzip your skirt. “Today was a good day for us. Tonight is all about you.”

Really?

Mike filled a glass for you, held it to your lips as Andy worked the skirt down your body. The wine was sweet on your tongue, almost as sweet as the grin Andy wore when he saw what was under your skirt.

And what wasn’t under there.

Hooking one long finger at the edge of your black stocking, he pulled it to snap back against your skin. The lace tops gripped your thighs, but there were no panties to hide the glistening flesh between them. You sucked in a breath at the excited look that earned you.

“The whole day?” Andy wondered aloud with a grin.

You nodded. “If we didn’t win the Fields case, I thought maybe it would cheer you up.”

And you were a little nervous about it because you’d never done anything like that in your entire life.

Mike joined the two of you on the comforter, encouraging you to finish your wine. Once you had, he took the glass from you with one hand as the other slid up your thigh and into your wet heat. You gasped as his fingers explored you, teasing circles around your clit.

“You’ve been thinking about celebrating too, huh?” Mike looked so pleased.

Leaning in, Mike claimed your lips in a heated kiss as Andy moved closer. Someone was unbuttoning your blouse as Andy’s lips teased your neck. The brush of whiskers and heated lips, the feel of Andy’s hands as he pulled off your blouse and bra pushed up the need you’d battled all day. Had your body weeping, clenching for them.

You’d never been that into sex until now. Before sex was good, depending on your partner, but it had been almost as transactional as your current situation. Sex helped you move things from a hook up to a relationship. Maybe one day you’d find someone that cared about you, wanted to spend their life with you. If the sex was good, all the better.

Now? Either of your lawyers could make you melt with a glance.

Two sets of hands skimmed over your body, and you shivered. When Mike’s lips blazed a trail down your jaw to your neck, Andy’s mouth claimed yours as a finger traced around one of your nipples. When it tightened into a hard little peak, he covered it with his mouth. As Mike chained kisses over your neck and shoulder, he slid a finger into your channel. And you tried to clench around that digit. It wasn’t enough.

You didn’t mean for the whine to escape your lips, but it did. Mike eased back from you with a knowing smirk. His fingers made quick work of the buttons of his dress shirt, and you couldn’t take your eyes off him as he stripped it off. While Andy teased your breast, his fingers skimming the tender flesh at your inner thigh, Mike resumed teasing your pussy. When he slid two fingers inside you, teasing your walls, you were breathless and needy.

Mike stole a kiss. “Want to try something new tonight?” he whispered against your lips.

Andy paused at the question before stripping off his own shirt.

Mike’s fingers slid in and out of you in a way he knew would make you squirm. His lips were warm on yours.

“Use your words, beautiful,” he prompted you.

“What did you… want to try?” you managed to ask.

His large fingers pulled free of you, and you whined again. A single finger slid on the wetness between your lower lips, carefully, and slid back to your other entrance. You froze at the unfamiliar touch.

You didn’t miss the warning look Andy shot him. Wrapping his arms around you, he eased you back into his solid warmth. His lips were gentle on your shoulder. “Easy,” he whispered.

Mike was nothing if not tenacious. His finger lightly traced around that tight ring as he brushed more careful kisses over your lips.

“Never tried anything like that, huh?” he asked.

“No,” you whispered as his finger continued his campaign.

“Mike…” Andy started.

Pulling back to gaze into your eyes, Mike’s smile was gentle. “Want to try? If you really don’t like it, we’ll stop.”

Andy cut him another look.

“I’ll stop,” he corrected. “But if you relax, and trust me, this just might be amazing for all three of us.”

It was then when it occurred to you what he wanted. And Andy wasn’t interfering yet. You knew he absolutely would if he thought you were uncomfortable. It was the biggest reason that you nodded.

“Lay back, Andy,” Mike directed.

And Andy did, keeping his gaze on you. His gaze was caring, willing you to trust him.

“Okay, baby,” Mike purred in your ear. “Why don’t you sit on Andy’s face? Be a good girl for him while I go get something.”

Tipsy on lust and wine, you didn’t resist when they moved you over Andy. Embarrassment burned and gave way to desire as his strong hands wrapped around your thighs and situated you just where he wanted you. With his mouth, he started burning you down. The tip of his tongue traced around your clit until you were fighting his hold. He held you there to tease around your entrance, making you desperate for more in a short period of time.

You weren’t even aware that Mike had returned until you felt him behind you, the heat of his excitement drawing your attention to the way his hands skimmed over your back, feather light. While Andy took you apart with his mouth, started fucking you with that talented tongue, Mike had goose flesh rising down your back. Those hands smoothed over your hips, and ass. The delicacy of his touch combined with the wicked slide of Andy’s tongue to make you crazy. Your hands clawed at Andy’s thick hair, and you unwittingly moved your hips with him, wanting more of that.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw the small white tube in Mike's hand. When Mike’s finger slid slowly between the globes of your ass, you shivered. Tingles of pleasure were already racing through your bloodstream from Andy’s efforts. That finger was slick, circling the untried ring of your ass with care. Mike kept that touch light, tempting.

Their attentions pushed you to the edge of release. You were a desperate thing straddling Andy’s face with Mike’s finger pushing carefully into your other opening. You felt good. You were so close…

Pressing up against you, Mike’s heat seeped into you. His lips teased your ear. “You gonna come on Andy’s tongue, beautiful?”

You gasped when he pulled the lobe of your ear between his lips. His finger pushed a little deeper into your ass.

“The sooner you come for us, the sooner you can ride his cock, baby,” Mike whispered. “I know you want him to fill that little pussy right now.”

Between those words and Andy’s teasing tongue, you came hard. Your cries had Andy moaning into the center of you, intensifying the waves that shook you to your core. While you rode out that euphoria, Mike worked a second finger into your ass. By the time you were aware of that slight stretch and burn, it wasn’t uncomfortable. It did remind you how empty your pussy felt.

Mike held you there and you felt Andy shifting beneath you. He was frantically undoing his slacks, pushing them down with his boxers. With Mike’s help, he eased you down his body until you felt the heated stalk of his cock against the wet flesh that craved it.

“Andy, please…” you begged. You wanted more and Mike’s teasing fingers were doing a lot to push your craving higher.

“I’ve got you,” Andy whispered with your juices shining off his lips and beard. His color was high as he positioned you over his cock, he and Mike guiding you to sink down on it. Andy stretched your walls, filled you up just the way you needed right now.

You were so full, rotating your hips to take all of Andy and reveling in how fucking wonderful he felt. His hands gripped your hips, guiding you to slowly start moving on him. Your movements didn’t dislodge Mike’s fingers. The fullness as he pressed a third finger into you, combined with Andy’s length, had your heart racing in excitement.

Like any woman, you’d thought about taking two men at once. You never thought you’d ever have the opportunity. But as you slid up and down on Andy’s cock and Mike’s fingers fucked your ass, you wanted more. You needed more.

When those fingers left you, you unapologetically whined. Andy took advantage of the moment to fuck up into you with firm quick strokes. You heard the sound of a zipper, felt Mike shifting behind you. When he moved behind you, pressing the head of himself at the opening of your ass you froze. Andy slowed down, his heated gaze meeting yours.

“Anything hurts,” he said in a breathy voice, “or you don’t like it, tell me. We’ll stop.”

You were struggling to breathe as Mike pushed past that tight ring. It stung.

“Tell me you understand,” Andy said gently.

You winced, as Mike’s slick cock pushed in a little further. But you nodded.

You clenched around Andy as Mike worked his way into you. It was uncomfortable at first and your hands clutched Andy’s shoulders tightly.

“Look at me,” Andy bid you. “Breathe, okay? Breathe. Try to relax.”

You did and once Mike was fully seated in you, the sting eased. When Mike began to move, he slid easily enough with the help of the lubricant. Andy watched you but didn’t move, allowing you to adjust.

“Oh, fuck,” Mike muttered behind you. “Your ass feels incredible, baby.”

It was feeling a lot better and after a couple of moments, you were moving with him. At that, Andy started moving in you again and the feeling of being impaled on both of them was unreal. The thought of what you were doing made you a slave to whatever they wanted. Two sets of hands gripped your ass. Two cocks worked into you, hitting every pleasure point you possessed.

Mike’s hand clutched in your hair, using it to pull your head back. With your neck bared to his teasing mouth, he took advantage as Andy bounced you on his cock. Mike worked into you from behind with care. You could tell he was holding back.

“You’re so good to us, baby,” Mike whispered into your skin. “Taking us both. You look so good riding our cocks… You feel like heaven.”

Andy, like you, seemed beyond speech. His lips gaped open as he watched you, pulling you down on his cock again and again. When he eased you down to him, his mouth claimed yours. You could taste yourself on his lips. When you couldn’t breathe anymore, you broke the kiss. Andy dipped his head to capture one of your nipples with his mouth. The wet lash of his tongue had you unraveling again, clenching around both of them as the orgasm rode you as hard as your two lovers were.

You were wilted between them, but they weren’t done. Their motions intensified as they chased their own release. Lying against Andy, you let them dominate you as they thrust into you faster and faster.

Mike reached his end first, pulling free of you and shooting his warm release all over your ass. Andy stayed seated inside of you, his cock punching up into you until a sob tore from his throat and he pumped his release into you like it was the last thing he’d ever do.

Andy’s heart was a steady cadence in your ear once you collapsed over him. His breath was as rushed as yours and his hands skimmed over your back with infinite care. Soft kisses pressed into your hair as he held you.

You felt the linen of Mike’s shirt as he wiped his release from your skin. Leaning up, he pressed a kiss to your shoulder. You knew he was about to leave and you felt bad you were so out of it at the moment.

“You heading out?” Andy’s voice was a rumble beneath you.

“I think I’ll crash here for the night,” Mike sounded tired.

Andy’s hands froze. Blowing out a sigh, he rolled to his side and eased you onto the comforter. You stretched, got comfortable. Andy pulled the comfort over you to keep you from being chilled without him.

“I’ll be back for cuddles in just a minute,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to your ear. You heard a little shuffling before you drifted off to sleep.

***

Andy pulled on his slacks as he led Mike from the living room. It wasn’t a conversation their girl needed to hear.

His girl.

Mike had pulled on his boxers, followed Andy to his home office.

Scrubbing a hand down his face, the smell of her was all over him, Andy regarded his partner.

“Is there a problem?” Mike asked, arms folded across his tatted chest. “With me staying over?”

“We didn’t talk about that,” Andy pointed out.

“There are a lot of things we didn’t talk about,” Mike came back.

Andy shook his head, heading for the mini bar to the side of his desk. He knew where this was going. He just didn’t want to have this discussion.

“Such as?” he asked, pulling out two glasses and pouring bourbon.

“When we came up with this, deal,” Mike said, “I guess I just assumed we’d get equal time with her.”

Handing him a glass, Andy drank from his own. “You know why she has to stay here, Mike. Your place isn’t safe. No offense.”

His partner nodded, his gaze dropped. He had no argument to make there.

“That’s why I don’t see why my staying here is a problem,” Mike went on. “It would give me more time with her. Even the playing field.”

“You want more sex?” Andy tried, hoping that was what Mike was getting at but suspecting that wasn’t his motivation.

“No. I want more time with her,” Mike explained. “It’s not just about sex. Not anymore. She’s more than that to me.”

Andy knew.

“I don’t know,” Andy stalled, having more bourbon.

“What’s the problem?” Mike wanted to know. “We have three-way sex pretty often. Why would actually sleeping together be an issue?”

Mike went further than Andy expected. He could see the younger lawyer asking to sleep next to her in the guest room. But was he really suggesting they all share a bed?

Tired as he was, Andy’s mind still spun. “Here and there I guess it would be okay. But often? People talk.”

Mike rolled his eyes, setting the glass of alcohol on Andy’s desk untouched. “How many nights have I been over here until midnight or after, huh? We’re partners in a law firm. No one would give a shit.”

“I really don’t want some of your friends showing up,” Andy admitted. "I don't want them around her."

“Fuck, are you really going to bring up Ali stopping by here last week?” Mike asked, his frustration growing. “It wasn’t drugs. I paid him to dig up some dirt for me. It was part of the reason we won the case today in case you don't remember.”

“I still don’t want anyone like that around my house,” Andy warned. “Or her.”

That stopped him, had Mike pacing and raking a hand through his sandy hair.

“Look,” Mike said after a minute. “When we came up with this idea, it sounded great. But I didn’t immediately grasp the advantages you have in this situation. I want more.”

Draining his glass, Andy regarded his partner.

“She can’t be at my place,” Mike said before he could. “I know that. But I’m sick of being a guest star in the bedroom while we ride this contract out. I want equal time. I deserve that.”

“Mike,” Andy struggled with what he wanted to say. “If I agree to this, it’s just until the six months is up.”

Mike stopped, his brows rose. “And then?”

Andy blew out an exhale.

“And then the contract is up,” Andy told him. “She will have kept her end of the arrangement. She’s then free to do what she wants. Choose who she wants.”

Andy just hoped to God she chose him.

“That include living here?” Mike demanded.

Yes. Andy hoped she’d want to stay.

Mike shook his head. “I can’t match that. And I’m… I’m sorry, I’m not willing to just let you have her.”

“Excuse me?”

“I have a lot to offer her too.” Mike meant it.

Andy knew he did and he was younger.

But how were they going to deal with the situation?

“So how does this play out?” Andy threw it back at him.

Mike studied him for a moment, thinking. That razor-sharp mind was going a mile a minute. It was one of Mike’s strengths. And weaknesses. Mike so easily got lost in his head. Feelings? He didn’t navigate so well.

“When the contract is over,” Mike said finally, “we leave it up to her.”

Oh, it sounded good. But Andy knew it wasn’t going to be that easy.

“Whoever she chooses, the other one just needs to accept it,” Mike said flatly. And with the way his chin lifted when he said it, Andy knew he intended for their girl to choose him.

Andy nodded.

But he had a very different plan.

@21stcenturywitchcraft @abyssaint @alyssaforever2671 @buckybarnesplumwhore @bval-1 @caffiend-queen @candy-and-writing @capsicle-shield @chaoticfiretaconerd @chrisevansgirl @chris-evans-indian-fanfic @coldmuffinbanditshoe @daughterofthenight117 @hv-chw3 @iheartsebandchris @imanuglywombat @jeremyrennerfanxxxx123 @just-one-ordinary-fangirl @justrae9903 @lok1sgrl @lokislastlove @mariaenchanted @marvelouspottering @maxwelllee2020 @nannies-dont-date @nekoannie-chan @nerdwholikesword @notyourtypicalrose @peaceinourtime82 @rainbowkisses31 @rayofdawnworld @richonne4life @rissysthoughts-blog @saiyanprincessswanie @scarletsoldierrr @shygirl-00 @stargazingfangirl18 @supernaturaldean67 @sweater-daddiesdumbdork @team-iron-wannabe-man @titty-teetee @tonib666 @villanellevi @weebid @what-is-your-backupplan-today @what-is-your-wish @xoxabs88xox @onetwo3000 @rosalynshields @naturalthrone22 @marvelovernfan @made-ofsilkandroses @mustangshelby04 @starlightcrystalline @gotnofucks @nerdygirl8203 @princesssterek @vampy-doll @alexakeyloveloki @littlelurkinglark @bluemusickid @tenaciousperfectionunknown @marvelovernfan @violentyoshi

#Barber & Weiss #Andy Barber #Mike Weiss #Who gets the girl?

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gottagobackintime · 11 months

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Do you think the writers were originally gonna make Ted bi but chickened out? Literally what was up with the bi-angles around Ted's head? Was it bait? Or was it just a queer easter egg or subtle nod to Colin and Trent's conversation earlier?

That is a very good question.

An argument could be made that they wanted to show a straight man who is comfortable in his masculinity, a straight man that doesn’t have to prove how masculine he is. And that’s why he feels comfortable referencing musicals and complimenting other men’s appearance.

BUT an argument could also be made that he was intended to be queer but somewhere along the line they changed their mind or simply felt like they didn’t have time to properly tell that story.

I feel that it’s not that strange for us to read into what the characters are saying and doing, especially since the show has set a precedence for that kind of viewing when it comes to the canon queer characters. Considering that the only hint we had of Trent being gay, was that he touched another man’s arm and told him to wait outside Rebecca (and of course his *heart eyes* at Ted, thank you James!), and we didn’t get it confirmed until he came out to Colin, which made a large part of the audience think that he would out Colin and that he should get together with. When it comes to hints about Colin, we had the Grindr comment and with Keeley we had all of her comments about finding women hot and dipping her toes back into the lady pool. But all of these hints were in large ignored by the straight audience but picked up on by a large portion of the queer audience. So why should we ignore the hints when it comes to Ted?

What makes Ted’s comments and behaviour towards men come from a place of non-toxic masculinity? Why are we supposed to think that he’s straight when there are so many subtle and not so subtle hints that he’s bi? The pink triangle by his head in the same episode where two gay characters are sitting by/on a monument made out of pink triangles and they talk about it. The bi coloured triangles, when they could have picked any other colours, especially in an episode that deals with being queer. All of his comments about men being attractive. I feel like there are too many hints to ignore, especially when, as I said above, the canon queer characters got LESS obvious hints (with the exception of Keeley I guess, but people thought she was just joking so I think it counts) about their sexuality.

But yeah, I don’t know why they seemingly dropped so many hints that Ted is queer and then didn’t follow up on it. I wish I knew what their intentions were. I haven’t even made my mind up about what I think. They might have leaned a bit too much into Ted being a representation of non-toxic masculinity that they ended up with a queer coded Ted instead. But they also might have felt that they didn’t have time to develop a storyline that dealt with that, especially since they added too many characters and stories in season three for them to handle at times. But it was too late for them to change the core of Ted’s character. Then there was also the problem with them sending Ted back to Kansas. Any potential love interest would either have to go with him or they’d have to do long distance. And considering that the only real possible love interest, who is a man, is Trent, that would complicate things. Trent also has a child so he wouldn’t be able to just uproot his life and follow Ted. I think they scrapped the idea of Ted having a proper love interest that would give him a strong reason to stay in England. You know what I mean. That would add another level that would feel complicated, and I think that the writers might have thought that it would be an unsatisfying ending, him having to leave his love interest behind (I still feel like it was unsatisfying because they didn’t convince me enough that Ted was actually okay with his decision, but that’s a discussion for another day) even if the intent might have been to have Ted be queer. OR they want to keep the option open for confirmed bi Ted in any potential spin-offs.

It really all depends on how much credit you want to give to the writers I suppose. And I honestly don’t know where I stand at the moment.

#we ask ze questions #ted lasso spoilers #ted lasso #tedependent #I hope this makes sense even if I guess I didn't really answer the question properly #but I honestly don't know what I believe #but one thing I am 100% certain of #is that James Lance 100% played Trent as being in love with Ted #you cannot convince me otherwise

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thebroccolination · 1 year

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Thank you!!! Atleast we know that there are more projects with Boun and Prem and they won't disappear. You know sometimes I get super invested in a pair then they interact rarely after their done. Boun and Prem are different for sure, I'm so excited:))

They went through their own journey figuring out their partnership, too! Early in 2020, they didn’t have a solid direction. From interview to interview throughout 2020 and 2021, they gave more and more nuanced answers to the question of their future. Boun intended on working behind the scenes in summer of 2020, and it seemed to be the first Prem was hearing of it, because he was like, “No, you have to stay in front of the camera with me.” The next time they were asked, a few weeks later, Prem said he’d go behind the scenes with Boun when Boun leaves. Boun’s response to that was basically, “You’re still young, you can’t quit yet.” The next time, it’d evolved again to both of them agreeing that they’d work together in front of the camera for as long as they can, then go behind the scenes together. So it’s clear they’ve had these conversations and they’re serious about consulting each other not just about their individual choices, but the future of their partnership. <3

They’re also the ones who started using the phrase: “Where there is Boun, there must be Prem.”

Their interview with the LoveCast podcasters was lovely, too. They seemed a little shy and careful when answering how long they’ll work together, but they said they’d prefer to work together over anyone else, and if they can, they’ll stay together. Considering how successful BU has already been, and the fact that they have other series confirmed for next year, I’m not worried about them. <3 I think they’ll have a stable future, if all goes well.

#kiranokira answers #bounprem

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inspiteallthedanger · 2 years

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still thinking about that one scene in Going Nowhere when John refers to the song he and Paul are writing as “soppy.” since John’s sudden burst of creative productivity seems to coincide with the start of his and Paul’s romantic relationship, one can assume that John is inspired by Paul and their love (and vice-versa). so, this begs the question: what is this “soppy” song? what is it about? there are some lyrics included at the beginning of the chapter but they’re unfamiliar to me. and if this song is soppy, how soppy are the other songs on their album? are you telling me that john and paul are writing love songs about each other, together? gazing into each other’s eyes and singing words inspired by and intended for the other? just fuck me right up. it’s just the most romantic thing ever. i am demanding an elaboration of this musical situation immediately. also, if both John and Paul are feeling similarly inspired, creating music with ease, why on earth did they never release another joint album together? do they just sing their soppy songs to each other in private? is this a scenario that plausibly exists? thanks for your time

Ooooh. What a lovely ask to get. Yes, is the short answer. I like to imagine that the album definitely looks at their relationship, both the separation and coming back together. I’m sure, though, that they’d both be aware that people will be looking for that meaning, so they probably didn’t go too literal. Although there’ll be some leeway, because all the angsty songs from John will likely be attributed to his breakup with Yoko anyway. But I like to imagine that the lead single is 100% just a very sappy love song, but it’s not sentimental, because of the arrangement. Like, an upbeat fun song about the joy of reconnecting. The lyrics in that chapter are 100% a Paul song written for John. And John knows that, and teases Paul. And Paul in response will never confirm that it’s for John, just to wind him up, but they both know. But mostly, I think Paul would just have songs that are more “Life is SO great, I’m having a ball.”

Side note, later he 100% writes a song about a man that’s got two life partners and everyone gets along and it’s happy. It’s an album track that everyone assumes is Paul writing his songs about other people. It’s John’s favourite and he brings it up in interviews sometimes.

I think the point is, they don’t collaborate publically. There is Anthology which they work on together. They 100% do write songs together but just allow whoever came up with it to put it on their solo album. But, John especially just doesn’t want the pressure on their relationship of being a hit machine while also trying to be lovers. Also, I think there’s a sense that they do need some sort of separation artistically if they’re not going to fall back into bad patterns. But they’d still even turn up with a producer credit sometimes on most albums, or Paul would play the piano on a John track. But it’s just not credited as a full Lennon/McCartney. So, they’ll continue to inspire each other and collaborate. But, also, I do see it’s like “Wouldn’t they give into the temptation?” But I think there were plenty of IRL interviews where they talked about a Beatles reunion and commented that they didn’t want to risk it. Do they want to sully their perfect track record, by making something less good. I really respect that, and I’m personally glad they stayed strong in some ways. Anyway, thanks for this gorgeous ask, you lovely person.

#going nowhere #beth rambles

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bisluthq · 5 months

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I’ll start this off with some disclaimers. Maybe I’m rewriting history, maybe I’m too cynical, maybe I’m forgetting all the good stuff. We’ve talked about some relationships being good until they’re not. But the more I learn about Joe and Taylor, the more I wonder if it was ever that good. All couples fight and have rough patches but they shouldn’t happen that often.

Taylor’s songs about Joe, from what I remember right now but it could be confirmation bias, were about how hot he is, how smart he is, how much better he is than her, how he’s above everything. And honestly looking back that doesn’t sound that good? We don’t really have any bits of her sharing things he did for her other than being with her when she felt no one else would. Something I noticed while they were together and that I just keep coming back to is the jealousy themes and the communication issues. I believe the base of a relationship is trust and communication so those were always red flags to me, but she said she was happy and I chose to believe they had worked those things out. But it all doesn’t sound that good now.

Sometimes you’re compatible with someone until you aren’t. But were they ever that compatible?

They met when Taylor was in a bad place, they got together when she was in an even worse place. She run away with him. She saw him as her savior, the only person who didn’t judge her at the time, the only person willing to stay with her. But was that ever that healthy of a dynamic? Everyone thinks their partner is the best, but it should be based on more than what it seems like it was based here.

After that we get 2017-2018, when they had some issues according to Lover. How long those issues lasted I don’t know, but there were issues. Things seemingly got better in 2019 and then in 2020 they were stuck together, and bonded over music. But at this point it seems like it prolonged a relationship that would’ve lasted a lot less. Now we get to 2021, they spent most of that year in Ireland, then he went to Panama and by December she was writing you’re losing me. You don’t get to that point in a couple of weeks, that must have been brewing.

We get to midnights, where she gets back to “I’ve been under scrutiny, you handle it beautifully” which is that dynamic I talked about before. But then also “I just wanna stay in that lavender haze”, which now hits different (no pun intended).

Looking at a lot of the themes of the past few albums doesn’t help, and Midnights is a lot of looking back at past relationships and maybe learning from them.

I don’t know if I’m making any sense and it could be a massive overreaction but the more I look at this relationship the more it looks like it was never that good or healthy.

If the songs that, in my opinion, have red flags are what she released and she was keeping things like you’re losing me, who knows how much else she was keeping.

This is not me saying Joe was a horrible boyfriend, but I don’t actually know if the relationship was good for either of them.

It’s like she had him in a pedestal because of the events of 2016 and then a lot of it was her trying to be good enough for him and trying her hardest to make it all work. But I think a lot of it was just based on lust and passion, and I think a lot of it was Taylor gaslighting herself into thinking this relationship was better than it was.

some valid thoughts in this for sure 🤷🏻‍♀️ The trust and communication were issues from her Rep songs onwards really so yeah you’ve made some valid points here. It’s impossible to know if they’d have worked stuff out differently without the pandemic or whatever.

But I do think there was a lot of love there for a long time and then yk there wasn’t and that’s when it was time to make like Elsa and let it go.

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thehangeddemon · 1 year

Text

Coming Home || Thavier, Abel, Devlin, & Hamilton || November, 2021

Theo: The first week without Xavier was rough for Theo. He found it hard to sleep, often forgot to eat (which the other members of the household made sure to correct) and he stayed as far away from their bedroom as possible.

It wasn't until the last day of that week, when Theo had chosen to spend the day in bed and Devlin joined him to try and cheer him up, that he realized he needed to pull it together. If he couldn't get out of bed for himself, then he'd do it for Devlin, and the next day he made sure to let his son know just how much their day together helped him feel better. He didn't want Devlin to worry, so he spent the next two weeks trying to find some semblance of normalcy. Only when he was completely alone, and once during a visit to Charles' home on a play date for the kids, did he let the feelings slip. By the end of the third week Theo found himself at his desk, buried in work for his book, which he'd been neglecting. It proved to be a good distraction, whereas before he could barely focus on it.

Abel: When they'd made the trip over, Abel had expected Xavier's stay in London to last at least a month, if not more. The demon always tended to prefer solitude (or as close to solitude as he could get) when faced with situations that took a lot out of him. Solitude and silence.

Perhaps that's why it came as such a surprise when, after only three weeks, Xavier expressed a desire to return home.

Although, Abel supposed, perhaps it shouldn't have. Xavier wasn't the same lone wolf he'd been when they'd met all those years ago. He had a child now, a partner. Staying away for the extended periods of time that had once been the norm wasn't a possibility anymore, even if his present situation was still taking a lot out of him.

So, a few days before the demon's official return, Abel traveled back to the estate to inform the household, and Theo especially.

The hunter would hear an enthusiastic knock on his study door followed by, "Theeeeeeo! It's Abel, can I come in?"

Theo: Theo was engrossed enough in his work that when Abel knocked, Theo jumped in his chair. He had to laugh a little at himself, so easily startled by a knock, but the smile was genuine as he turned toward the door.

"Come on in, Abel," Theo replied as he swallowed down a sudden rush of anxiety. Abel was supposed to be with Xavier, and everyone there had access to a phone where a text would be easy enough to send a message, so what could have brought him home?

Theo tried not to look too far into it, Abel didn't sound distressed, and a phone call would have delivered that kind of a message just as easily. So, it must be something else. Theo leaned back and steadied himself, hoping that he didn't look quite as tired as he felt. Sleeping without Xavier still wasn't easy.

Abel: Abel poked his head in and smiled. "Hey man!"

Oh, Theo. No need to ask him how he'd been, because unfortunately the man did look as emotionally and physically exhausted as he probably felt. This situation was taking a lot out of more than just Xavier.

Still, Abel determinedly kept his cheerful demeanor as he entered the room and plopped down on the nearest chair.

"I come bearing good news! The king is coming back to the castle in a couple days."

Theo: "Hello, Abel. It's nice to see you," Theo chuckled, always amused by the familiar's overabundance of cheer. It was the type of thing that would annoy Theo if it were anyone else, but Abel was so genuine that it was hard to think anything negative about that smile. His energy was especially helpful in a time like this.

"He's coming home?" Theo asked, his eyes widening at Abel's words. He felt sudden rush of excitement that was quickly checked by reality. "Is he feeling better?" Theo knew enough about Xavier to know the answer would be mixed at best, but he was curious to know what had prompted the decision to return.

Abel: "He's coming home," Abel confirmed with a nod. The news seemed to have the intended effect, but he could practically feel Theo reining it in. He knew it couldn't be helped.

The familiar sighed. "He's...better than he was when we left." There was still melancholy and anger, there were still nightmares, but overall Xavier was better. He was making progress little by little. "I can't tell you that the Xavier that walks in here later this week is gonna be his old self but I can tell you that he's gonna be more comfortable with his new self."

Theo: Theo felt something tight in his shoulders, something he'd been holding onto from the moment he left Xavier alone in that room, relax and unravel. Regardless of his level of comfort with this new body, he wanted to come home, and the relief that brought Theo was palpable.

He nodded to Abel and made no effort to hide his feelings over Xavier's return.

"I'm glad- that he wants to come home," Theo paused, and his smile wavered as something else occurred to him. "What... How- how should I be around him?" Theo finally awkwardly asked. "What... should I do, or avoid, I guess?" Theo's brow furrowed and with a sigh he pinched the bridge if his nose. He knew there was nothing wrong with what he'd asked, or how, this was one hell of a unique situation in which there were no guidelines on how to navigate, but it was hard not to let the frustration get to him.

Abel: Abel's gaze softened and warmed. "Be how you always are," he said simply. "I know it's hard not to think about what he went through. It's hard for me, too. And I can understand if you can't help thinking about what happened when you look at his face because you're only looking at that face because something did happen. We're only human. Mostly." That last bit was added with a grin in an attempt to lighten Theo's mood.

"Seriously though, I think being how you always are is the best thing for him. Helps it feel more normal, you know? It's not and he does get frustrated when we're calmer about it than he is but what else can we do? Us expressing our anger and indignation over what happened isn't gonna lessen his. He knows that deep down."

Theo: "Mostly," Theo agreed with a slight smile. It did help to lighten the mood enough to stop Theo from dwelling on the "what-ifs" of their situation. If Xavier was ready to come home, he knew there were going to be growing pains to their situation. It wasn't going to be easy, but if he was ready to try, Theo was more than ready.

"Alright, then we will try to make things feel as normal as we can, given the circumstances," he sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. Already his mind was shifting gears from where he'd stopped writing to what would need to be done before Xavier's return. He glanced at the couch in his study, haphazardly covered with blankets and pillows, that he'd been using as a bed for the past couple weeks. He'd used a guest room occasionally but sleeping in a bed alone (when he wasn't on a hunt or Xavier wasn't working) felt wrong after so many years.

"I will... try to start sleeping in our bed again. Unless you think Xavier will want to have time to adjust to it again first?"

Abel: “I think that’s a good idea,” said Abel, nodding his agreement. “Kinda the only way to adjust again is by doing it, you know?”

He didn’t want to comment too much on Theo and Xavier’s sleeping situation—that was completely their business—but in his eyes that was another area that could use an attempt at a return to normalcy.

Even though he understood Xavier was coming from with the not wanting to sleep in the same bed just yet from the few times they’d broached the subject, he knew that it could very easily cause a rift in their relationship. He and Theo needed intimacy, so they could build more trust. Everything depended on that.

Theo: "Yeah, I totally agree," Theo nodded, but the confidence with which he spoke did not match the anxious twist of his stomach. Despite the anxiety over the unknown, Theo knew they had to face it to find each other again, and he was more than ready to start taking those steps. He might not feel ready in this moment, but he had to be.

"I'll message him, when we're done here, see what he thinks." Texting had been their primary form of contact through this, but if they were trying to make a step towards change.... "Maybe I'll call him this time." He stared at the one of the papers on his desk for a moment, lost in thought. "When is he coming home? I trust you'll fill everyone else in?"

Abel: Abel gave Theo an encouraging smile. “There you go. The two of you are gonna be okay, you just need to keep taking those baby steps.”

That was what he’d been telling Xavier this whole time. Things couldn’t get better if he didn’t try to make them better, and the demon was finally at the point where he was willing to take that step forward and reclaim his life from this tragedy.

“End of the week. Just a couple of days from now.” He nodded. “I will. You leave the briefing and the house prep to me.”

Theo: Theo nodded in agreement. They would need to do some serious work to find a new normal, but Theo knew their love was stronger than this. It was a relief to know Xavier was ready to start, and Theo was ready to meet him at whatever pace he set.

"Alright, then I'll let Devlin know that his Daddy is gonna be home soon," Theo smiled at that, because he could already picture his son's unbridled joy at the news.

Abel/Hamilton: The familiar got to his feet and went around the desk to give Theo's shoulder a good hearty pat. "You do that, and let his happiness make you happy. Everything is going to be fine, you'll see." He offered another smile. "In the meantime, you get some rest. You look like hell, brother. Can't keep burning the candle at both ends."

He went to the door. "I'll let Hamilton and the staff know," he added with a parting wave.

Which is precisely what he did as soon as he left Theo's study. He was certain the maids had a barrage of questions, so he opted to just tell Hamilton and leave the rest of it to him. Smoother that way.

Sure enough, all the butler asked for was the date of Xavier's return.

"Friday. Have Christine make something with pastry for dinner, it'll cheer him up. Oh, and pack up all his clothes so they can start being sent out for alteration."

Hamilton nodded. "I'll take care of it. So Friday?"

"Friday. See you then, buddy."

Theo: "Thanks, Able," Theo smiled and shook his head. He knew Abel was right about his appearance, and when Xavier returned he would like to look his best. He knew the signs of his struggle to sleep would not be entirely gone by the time Xavier made it home, but he could look better with some decent, regulated sleep. He would have to ask Colleen for something to help.

---

Today was finally the day. Inside Theo raged a war of anxiety and excitement, and from the moment he woke up a ball of uncertainty weighed heavily in the pit of his stomach. He showered, shaved, applied his favorite cologne, styled his hair, and spent way too long trying to decide on a nice outfit that still looked casual. Nice jeans and a dark red sweater where the final choice, and as Theo stared in their bedroom mirror he reminded himself that this was the same as Xavier coming home from a long trip. Not that it was the same, but Xavier was finally coming home, and overthinking that wouldn't help either of them. At least he'd gotten regular sleep over the past week, the signs were still there, but his smile would be much more genuine now.

After a few slow, steadying breaths Theo glanced at the clock. It was about time to get ready to wait for Xavier downstairs, so Theo left his own room to find his son.

"Devy, you ready to head downstairs and wait for Daddy?" Theo asked as he knocked on his son's door.

Xavier: "I'm ready!" came the little voice from the other side.

Devlin was every bit as excited as Theo to see his father, but innocence and youth spared him the overthinking and worrying that Theo was having to battle. He'd accepted Xavier's absence as easily as he'd accepted his new face and to him, this really was nothing more than this father returning from a trip.

Which wasn't to say he hadn't missed his Daddy. He had a million questions to ask and a million things to show him.

The little boy opened his door and beamed up at his Papa. He'd chosen to wear his favorite animal t-shirt to mark the occasion.

"Is Daddy here yet? Have you seen him?"

Theo: Theo smiled when he saw the shirt Devlin had picked out.

"Not yet, but that's why we're going to go downstairs and wait for him," he offered his hand to his son, and tried to mirror some of his excitement. Xavier was returning home, and he had a feeling the nerves he felt now would work themselves out on their own- as long as he didn't dwell on them. With Devlin and his smile nearby, Theo knew he wouldn't get the chance to. Xavier was coming home.

"How about we wait by the front door? It's a little too cold to wait outside."

Xavier: "Okay!" Devlin took his Papa's hand and practically dragged him downstairs.

Hamilton and Lydia were already waiting. There had been talk of the rest of the staff greeting Xavier upon his return but the butler had nipped that notion in the bud. This was no ordinary homecoming and after everything he'd been told, he didn't want to overwhelm their master. A small greeting would be more than enough.

"Is Daddy here yet, Hamilton?" Devlin asked excitedly as they joined the butler.

Hamilton smiled and shook his head. "Not yet, but soon. Abel said four o'clock, in time for tea. It's all set up in the library," he added to Theo. "I thought that would the most appropriate place."

Theo: Theo smiled appreciatively at Hamilton. He only knew on a surface level how hard this had been for Xavier, and he could only imagine how a small, intimate welcome home would be easier on him.

"That's perfect. Thank you, Hamilton," he gave Devlin's hand a squeeze and smiled down at him.

Xavier: At four o'clock on the dot, demon and familiar appeared without ceremony by the fountain in front of Atlas Manor.

"Welcome home," Abel said softly.

Xavier looked up at the house. His house, where his family and the people he'd come to care about lived their lives. Where he'd lived his life for the past fifty years and where he would continue to live it despite what had been done to him and what had been taken away.

After nearly a month in London, new face or not, he was ready to begin again.

He nodded at his familiar and led the way around the drive to the front door. There was no need to knock or wait for it to be opened; he knew it already was. Because he was expected.

And that was as much a comfort as the sight of his staff and his family waiting for him in the foyer.

"DADDY!"

He had only a second to brace himself before Devlin rushed over with his arms spread wide. He caught his son easily and let him squeeze him with all his six year-old might.

"Hi, Daddy! I missed you!"

Xavier felt tears burn his eyes as he pressed his lips to Devlin's head. "I missed you, too, my darling."

Theo: Theo's heart leapt to his throat when the door finally opened, and when their son shouted, he released Devlin's hand. He wanted to run with Devlin and leap into Xavier's arms together, but he thought it better to let his son have the first hug home. Devlin deserved an extra little moment with Xavier, because despite the amount of trauma that was hidden from him, the real reason for Xavier's 'trip', Theo knew Devlin missed his Daddy. Theo could be patient and wait his turn.

He felt his own tears tingle at the corner of his eyes when Xavier scooped Devlin up, and seeing the two of them had Theo mirroring the joy he saw on Devlin's face. He stepped up to them, invading their space with a tearful, happy smile directed at Xavier.

"Welcome home, baby."

Xavier: One of Xavier's chief worries when he'd been away was whether or not his son would treat him any differently after what had happened. Devlin may have accepted the explanation given to him, even rationalized it in his own way, but this was still a major change. It was new, different. It would have been perfectly reasonable for Devlin to need time to adjust.

The fact that things seemed completely normal was because of Theo. He must have had the same thoughts. That was why he'd asked for a photograph of his new face: to get Devlin used to it. If adjustment had been needed, it had been done when Xavier was away. Just like he had done.

Holding tight to Devlin with one arm, Xavier used the other to pull Theo to him and hold him. Tight.

"Your wisdom save us all," he whispered, closing his eyes.

Theo: Seeing Devlin react so naturally to Xavier, seeing all of his efforts pay off, caused a tiny knot of tension to unravel in Theo. Another followed as Xavier held him, creating just enough tears to let a few escape down his cheeks. He'd yearned for Xavier's touch for weeks, and even if it was different, it was still Xavier. It made that yearning just a little less sharp, a little less painful, and finally connected Theo to the hope he wanted to believe in. They'd figure this out.

He snaked his arm around Xavier's waist and rested his head on his demon's shoulder. A little lower now, but just as warm.

"I love you," Theo whispered in return, and he closed his eyes as he nuzzled into Xavier. He took the moment to breathe in Xavier's new scent, giving him the smallest squeeze.

Xavier: Xavier didn't notice when Hamilton, Lydia, and Abel quietly left the foyer to give them some privacy but later he'd be grateful for it. This moment was so private and precious and personal, and even though this was his house, he still wouldn't have felt comfortable having eyes on him while it unfolded. There were still too many layers of vulnerability with this new visage.

It would be a long while before Xavier felt able to let Devlin and Theo go. He was just grateful that they seemed to have the most patient six year-old on the planet, and that he seemed to understand the weight of what was happening.

He beamed up at his father and hugged his waist. "Daddy, Christine made your favorite cake! And she's gonna make pastry for dinner!"

Xavier chuckled. "Did she indeed? We'd better go eat it then."

Theo: Theo held his loves tightly in the quiet, private space of the moment, and he felt weeks’ worth of tension and uncertainty ease from his shoulders. Xavier was home, and they could start to figure out what their new normal looked like. He had hope, and he was grateful the others left quietly.

"She did," Theo agreed and he lifted his head from Xavier's shoulder. Reluctantly, he loosened his grip on Xavier's waist, but his hand still sought Xavier's to tangle their fingers together. He didn't want to let go just yet, they'd spent so long apart that Theo felt desperate for any sort of touch, but he knew he had to be careful and not overwhelm Xavier.

"Want to run ahead and let Colleen know we're ready? Daddy and I will join you in just a minute." Theo gave Xavier's fingers a little squeeze, a request for a moment alone- just the two of them.

Xavier: "Okay!" With no idea where Hamilton and Lydia went, Devlin ran off to the kitchen to go tell Colleen that his parents were ready for tea, and to inform her that the occasion called for extra big pieces of cake.

Xavier watched him go with far more emotion than was warranted. He'd missed this. Hearing his baby's voice echoing through the house, hearing his footsteps. There had come a point where the house in London felt a little too quiet.

He turned back to Theo and smiled softly, tangling their fingers together. "Let's go into the library." Abel had mentioned they'd be having tea in there today, and the walk up would give Xavier and Theo a few moments to themselves.

Theo: Theo's heart fluttered in his chest as their fingers laced together, reminding him of the first time they'd ever held hands.

"Alright," He nodded and smiled in return. While they had a long way to go, having Xavier under the same roof already had Theo's heart feeling full.

Theo squeezed his hand and gently tugged him down the hall.

"Devlin has done nothing but talk about you returning home since I told him," Theo said after a moment.

Xavier: Letting Theo lead meant Xavier didn’t have to. Such a small gesture but even that was enough to give him some respite, offering one less decision for him to make.

Xavier nodded. “Abel told me. I worried that he’d be expecting something…grander but that doesn’t seem to be the case.” For which mercy he gave thanks.

“And you? Were you…?”

Theo: "I made sure to help set the appropriate expectations," Theo chuckled, and he hoped their efforts were helping to make his transition easier. It if meant making Xavier more comfortable, Theo was more than ready to lead.

"Unable to stop talking about your return home?" he grinned, "I wouldn't shut up. Devlin and I talked about it together quite a bit."

Xavier: Xavier nodded again, managing to return Theo’s smile. He looked so happy. Not as burdened as he had seemed before Xavier left.

Another mercy to be grateful for, and an answer to the question he’d truly meant to ask. It would seem that Theo hadn’t had any grand expectations for his return either.

“I’m glad to hear it. I know I was away for a long time and frankly I intended to be away longer but…I missed you. Both of you. I had to come back.”

Theo: The toll of sleepless nights had left shadows under Theo's eyes, but there was a noticeable change now that Xavier was home. In a lot of ways he had to contain his excitement, so instead he focused on keeping things gentle, like the trail of his thumb over the back of Xavier's hand.

"I missed you too," another squeeze, and he paused as they reached the library door. "And I'm glad you're back. We both are."

Xavier: Xavier’s shoulders subtly slumped in relief. That was one thing taken care of, and fairly smoothly in fact. The next one was going to be a bit harder.

He sighed and turned to face Theo, taking his other hand and squeezing. Some things needed contact in order to be said.

“Forgive me,” Xavier said quietly. “For not being the one to tell you that I was going to London. For having it be Rohan. You deserved to hear it from me but I couldn’t face you. I needed time, I needed to get used to…all this.”

Theo: Theo gently squeezed Xavier's hands once he had them both, and his smile softened with Xavier's apology.

"It was... hard, for me- Xavier. I hated knowing you had been hurt and there was nothing I could do. I couldn't protect you then, and I couldn't help you with this, now. I felt... very inadequate for a while, and you turning me away...." Theo felt his throat tighten, but he held it together with a slow breath. He wanted to be open with Xavier, they both had no illusions about the difficulty of their situation, "....it was really hard." His voice wavered. "There were times where I read too much into that rejection. But..." He lifted one of Xavier's hands to his lips to place a few tender kisses along his knuckles.

"I understand. I can only imagine what it takes to deal with something like this. So I forgive you. And you know I'm here to support you, whatever that looks like."

Xavier: “I’m sorry.” Xavier cleared his throat so Theo wouldn’t hear how close his voice was to breaking. “It was never, ever my intention to make you feel that way or to reject you. My pushing you away wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t anything about you or anything that you had done.”

He took a deep breath. “You offered something I wasn’t quite…prepared to receive. I could hardly stand to look at my own reflection, the notion that you could look at me with love and kindness was difficult for me to accept. I wanted to, desperately, but my mind was full of…other things. Dark, excruciating things I didn’t want you to witness. I still don’t. You still might. But I’m here now and I thank you very sincerely for forgiving my weakness.”

Theo: Even in this body, Theo could recognize Xavier was struggling, and he gave those new hands another squeeze.

"You have nothing to apologize for, my love. None of this situation is your fault. You needing to push me away- that isn't your fault either. I knew deep down it wasn't you rejecting me, I was just feeling insecure in those moments."

Theo smiled softly and reached up to cup Xavier's cheek.

"I think weakness would've been leaving entirely. You're here after everything- that takes a lot of strength. I hope one day you feel you can share more with me."

He paused and leaned forward, lower than he used to with Xavier being shorter, and kissed the cheek opposite his hand. Then he pulled back and smiled up at Xavier.

"The last thing I think you are is weak, Xavier Atlas."

Xavier: He wouldn't say it, not to Theo or to anyone else, but for a moment, Xavier had thought of leaving. For a single moment, he'd considered having the staff pack up his things and send them to him. He had several properties, near limitless resources to acquire more. It would've been so simple to run away.

He'd done it before. It would be easy to do it again. That he hadn't was perhaps--he hoped--testament to how far he'd come. How much he'd grown.

Xavier ducked his head to put himself more easily within Theo's reach. "I've shared more with you than I thought myself capable of. If you believe me to be strong, then I have no choice but to believe you." Even if he still doubted, and even if he believed himself weak with every brand-new fiber of his being.

Theo: To say there weren't times where Theo doubted Xavier's return would be a lie, but every time those doubts crept in Theo's resolve, his belief that Xavier would return, only grew stronger. If anyone had to believe in Xavier, it was Theo, and the hunter had no desire to let Xavier's father sew any more seeds of tragedy than he already had.

"I'll take that," Theo chuckled, and as Xavier ducked his head, a kiss was placed on the opposite cheek. "I'll believe in you as much as you need, baby. Until you can believe it for yourself." His smiled softened, and he felt a gentle swell of admiration and love for the demon before him. Xavier was stronger than he gave himself credit for, and Theo hoped one day he would see it.

"I'm so glad you're home, Xavier. I've missed you terribly."

Xavier: "I'm glad to be home, too." Even if things weren't any less difficult than they had been before and even if he still didn't understand everything he felt, maybe for now just being home was enough. Xavier secretly wished it was, because he knew that was all he was capable of at the moment.

Coming back was still only physical.

"I've missed you, too. Should we, um..." He nodded toward the library. "We should go in and have that tea."

Theo: "We should," Theo agreed, and he took Xavier's hand in his own. They would figure this out, Theo and faith in that much.

With a gentle tug, he guided Xavier toward their little family reunion.

#Coming Home chapter #theobrandr #abelharrington #devlinatlasbrandr #fabianhamilton

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somewhatgreatexpectations · 3 years

Text

Set You Free (Wanda Maximoff/ Reader)

Hello friends!

Once more, double Lizzie!

Buckle up... it's a bumpy ride. :)

The sight of your ceiling etched itself permanently in your mind because that was all you were capable of doing. Staring at the ceiling. Wasting away. The concept was much more appealing than the decision that awaited you when the sun rose over the horizon.

Regardless of what you did you’d be breaking the heart of someone you loved. You had to face that.

Your own heart be damned. You’d break yourself a hundred times over if you believed for even a second that it would spare them.

Except you knew it wouldn’t. You knew that even not making a decision would be making a decision. Your heart thudded anxiously against your sternum at the thought, the deafening sound ringing in your ears.

The words they’d both said playing over and over in your mind. Every touch… every kiss.

All of it spinning rapidly in your mind until you were sure that no other thoughts would ever be capable of existing there ever again.

__________________

It had been twenty-four hours since you slept, give or take, and it took everything within yourself to drag your body out of bed and into the shower as a last-ditch attempt of clearing your mind.

It didn’t work. Of course, it didn’t.

Why would it?

After getting dressed, you took a deep, calming breath hoping that even for just one second the world would stop spinning and you would be able to focus your thoughts.

Again, it didn’t work.

Without thinking, you grabbed your keys and left the seclusion of your home. You needed to do something, not just wallow in your own agony and hope the answers would appear out of thin air. They deserved more than that. They deserved effort.

When you arrived at your destination, your hands trembled with each step you took up the familiar path. You clenched them into fist just for the sake of eliminating the issue.

Everything was amplified as you willed your hand to raise and knock on the door. The knock against the door reverberated through your sleep deprived mind. When the door swung open and your eyes met hers, you felt the tension drain from your shoulders. Even if it was just a bit.

“Wanda.” You breathed out, leaning into her automatically, sighing contently when her arms wrapped tightly around you.

You could vaguely feel her pull you into her apartment. “Y/n, you look exhausted. Did you sleep at all?”

Shutting your eyes, you hummed against her shoulder. “What time is it?” You asked dazedly.

“8 am.” She replied wearily.

Her fingers soothingly running through your hair almost lulled you to sleep until you heard her call your name again. “Oh. Right. No, I didn’t.”

The feeling of her gentle touch on your cheeks forced your eyes open again as you met her worried eyes. Those gentle eyes that you’d come to live for. “Moya lyubov’. You need to sleep. Come with me.”

Every movement felt disconnected from your body as the lack of sleep finally caught up to you. Wanda gently guided you over to the bed you had spent dozens of nights comfortably tucked into. The feeling heaven sent as she pulled the comforter over your shoulders.

You felt cared for. Loved.

“Wanda?” She hummed. “Can you stay with me?”

There was no response and for a moment you were sure she had left until you felt the warmth of her body gently turn you on your side as she crawled into the bed behind you. The familiar feeling of comfort overcame you as you felt her arms wrap tightly around your midsection and pull you close.

The scent of sandalwood invading all of your senses and the soft sound of her humming in your ear was the last thing your mind processed before you drifted off into a dreamless slumber.

When you opened your eyes again, you saw the sun significantly lower in the sky than when you had first arrived. Rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you made your way out of the warmth of Wanda’s bedroom and into the cold of the kitchen where you found the other woman at the stove.

The sight was familiar. Soothing.

“Wanda?” You called out, your voice still thick with sleep.

She spun around to face you, her eyes widened slightly in surprise, but the smile on her face was warm. “Good morning, Krasivaya. Well... afternoon I suppose. I was wondering when you’d finally wake up.” She said lightly.

You wandered over to her and rested your head on her chest as her arms wrapped easily around your waist. “Is that hot chocolate?”

Her lips pressed lightly against your hairline. “It is. I thought you could use a pick-me-up.” You smiled lightly with the ease of the moment. The ease of being with Wanda. The ease of… Everything.

“What time is it?” You eventually asked after allowing yourself to relish in the peace for just the briefest moment.

You could feel her lift her wrist to her face. “It’s just about to be 5. You slept for nine hours.” Her body shook slightly with her giggle and you couldn’t help the way your lips quirked up at the sound. Until you remembered what that time meant.

“I… I have to go.” You mumbled, stepping back awkwardly.

Wanda’s smile faltered, and your chest clenched at the sight. “I understand.”

You pressed a soft kiss to her lips, lightly brushing your thumb along her jaw.

When she pulled back and looked at you with a mix of love and pain you knew you couldn’t lose her. The thought alone terrified you.

With one final kiss, you turned and made your way to your car.

Love was supposed to be easy. With Wanda it was easy. It always had been. Falling in love with Wanda was as simple as breathing. You couldn’t lose that.

The racing thoughts in your mind made the drive feel like it passed in seconds. Your heart was anxiously pounding against your rib cage, and you were sure it was moments away from beating right out of your chest.

A selfish part of you wished that it would because then you would be spared from having to hurt someone.

Glancing at the clock on your dashboard, you saw it was 6 which meant there would no more opportunity to avoid the inevitable.

It was time to face the reality of what was about to happen.

The steps you took down the path felt never ending, each movement heavy. Heavy to complete, heavy on your heart. The situation felt familiar though, as if you had tread this path before.

The further down the path you walked, the more you became sure that the path would be something you could never come back from. You would never be able to change the outcome.

When you finally reached the clearing, you found her, and you couldn’t help but think back to all the moments that you had spent here with her before. The happy moments. The moments before life caught up to you both. A place of happiness.

A place that had originally started out as yours, until you realized that everything that was yours was hers too.

Leigh’s smile when she saw you made your heart clench, but you kept moving forward. You found yourself unable to stop yourself from smiling back at her. Especially since this might be the last smile she would ever give you. You wanted to curl in on yourself at the thought alone.

“How do you even remember this place?” You asked, still surprised that she was able to find you in a place you hadn't been to together in years.

Her shoulders lifted slightly in a small shrug. “Because I spent the last two years coming here when life got too much.”

Your breath hitched with her words. “Why?” You asked even though you weren’t sure if you wanted to know the answer.

“Because it always reminded me of peaceful times.” She laughed slightly. “Looking back now, I guess I would just come here and hope in the back of my mind that one day you’d be sitting under this tree like you used to when we were kids.”

For a moment you let the words wash over you because even if you didn’t say it out loud, that was why you found yourself seeking out this former place of comfort as well. “Leigh…”

Her smile fell when you finally met her gaze. The eyes that were shining happily just moments before were now filled with tears. Your heart broke at the sight. You couldn’t do anything to make her feel better though because you were the cause.

You caused her pain.

“It’s her.” She whispered, her voice thick with emotion. It wasn’t a question. You didn’t have to say anything. Leigh knew you well enough to know where you stood without words.

She sounded like she was about to cry, then she took a breath and it was gone. “I’m setting you free, Leigh.” You murmured passed the lump that had formed in your throat.

“Maybe I don’t want you to set me free, Y/n.” The response was quick. Like the slipping of words that weren’t intended to see the light of day. Her sharp intake of breath confirmed that. The words dug deeply into the furthest crevices of your heart, making the world around you darker as you fought to push down the emotions that they evoked. “Did you love me too?”

The silence that hung in the air was heavy with words left unspoken. Heavy with emotion that pressed down on your chest like bricks. “I did love you, Leigh. Beyond words. And I think… I think that sometimes you loved me too.” You eventually said. Your words were quiet, as if they were a secret meant just for you two. You kicked absently at the leaves beneath your feet to distract yourself. “We were just never able to get our timing right. And maybe that was a sign.”

A weak chuckle filled the air around you. “I didn’t love you sometimes, Y/n. I loved you always. Even when I didn’t say it. Even when you walked away... Even when I walked away” The tears that fell burned a path down your cheeks as you quietly listened to her. “We didn’t lose each other because of time. I think we lost each other by waiting for the other to admit that we were in love... Two soulmates who could never find each other even when we were standing right in front of each other.”

Your heart fragmented and you could feel the broken pieces hammer in your chest. “Leigh-”

“You know, I may not have been daylight for you… But you were my moon and stars… And when you left you took them with you. You were my light in darkness. I’m sorry that I turned off the light.”

The air became razor blades around you as it became impossible to breathe.

You couldn’t find it within yourself to meet her eyes. “I’m sorry, Leigh.” She didn’t respond, and you didn’t expect her to. “I’m so sorry.”

A tense silence hung in the air as though you were both trapped in limbo. Both terrified to move. To let go.

“Do you regret it?” You asked softly, the words so quiet you were certain they barely reached her ears.

Your heart thudded in agony when she refused to look at you. “Do I regret what?”

“I don’t know.” Your voice shook. “Everything.” Leigh was quiet for a long moment and you could feel heat burn the skin of your cheeks. You knew you should have left well enough alone.

Just as you opened your mouth to apologize to her for asking, she finally said, “Just because we didn’t work out doesn’t mean that you weren’t the best thing that ever happened to me… Because you were.”

“Yeah.” You said thickly, feeling the tears prickle in your eyes. “You, too.” You wanted to tell her that you wanted to fight for her, but you didn’t know how. You wanted to tell her of the fear that had become a permanent fixture in your heart. You wanted to tell her that it wasn’t her fault.

The battle had felt like it was lost long before it had even begun.

Instead you said nothing.

Leigh stepped closer to you, her eyes glazed over with unshed tears. “One last kiss.”

Your hand found her cheek as your palm slid against her skin. You nodded and pressed your lips to hers.

Soaring.

That’s what it always felt like when she was pressed against you like this. You felt the rush of helplessness, and a surge of emotion that filled you with warmth and she clung to you as if you were the only solid thing in this dizzying world.

Her mouth was insistent against yours and you could feel the shake of her lips that sent tremors through every nerve ending in your body. You slowed the kiss down. You needed to remember this. Everything... Before it was gone for good. Like how sweet her lips tasted even over the salty tears that fell from your eyes.

The kiss goodbye lasted years in your mind, yet it still wasn't long enough.

Then she stepped away and the spell was broken. You dazedly allowed your fingertips to brush away the stray tears on her cheeks even if they were replaced with fresh tears a moment later.

“I won’t love you forever, but I’m terrified I might. I won't stand in your way though” Leigh whispered, the words against your lips, sending chills down your spine. “Goodbye, Y/n.”

Before you could say anything, she pulled away, her hand slowly trailing down your arm until it stopped at your fingers. You could feel her lightly squeeze three times before she turned, and you quietly watched her walk away.

Every word stolen from your lips because what could you say? You had made the choice. When she had disappeared in the distance, your gaze fell to the grass where she had just stood and couldn’t help but ache.

Losing her was one of the worst things you could face, but you survived it once before. Loving her was a worse pain. It had to be.

You knelt slowly in the grass, the weight of the situation forcing you to your knees. When you attempted to stand again, you couldn’t move. It was as if the grief you felt changed everything within yourself entirely.

If this was what you wanted, why was it killing you inside to let her go?

___________________

Wanda shifted slightly in your arms and you tightened your hold around her, pulling her closer. Always pulling her closer. You could see her shift closer to you in her sleep and you couldn’t help but smile slightly at the sight.

You glanced at the clock to see the time glaring brightly back at you. 6 am. You hadn’t slept well in the last three days, but you didn’t want Wanda to know that. She would just worry.

Eventually, you were able to fall into a fitful sleep as the sun began peeking over the horizon.

The door opened, and you forced an unconvincing smile on your lips. “I did it. It’s over.” You said quietly.

Wanda just stared back at you with her brows furrowed in concern. “Are you okay?”

“I’m okay.” You mumbled as Wanda let you inside.

The concern never faded from her features. “You don’t have to pretend to be. It’s okay if you’re not.” Wanda said cautiously, her arm wrapped around you.

As if she said the magic word, the fake smile crumpled, and you felt the tears begin welling in your eyes. Wordlessly, she pulled you into her arms. You melted into the embrace, bunching your hands into the front of her sweater as quiet sobs fell from your lips. “I choose you, Wanda… but it hurt to let her go.” You whispered through tears.

With a start, you opened your eyes to the bright room, groaning when you saw how late in the afternoon it was. Even though you shouldn’t have, you closed your eyes again. The world was dull. And you couldn’t get out of bed.

You should be happy. So why weren’t you?

After another hour in bed, you knew you couldn’t avoid it anymore. Using all your willpower, you rolled out of bed and made your way to the bathroom. Forcing yourself through the motions as you brushed your teeth, showered and got ready for the remainder of the day.

It wasn’t until you looked in the mirror that you stopped. In the mirror your eyes met your own and you could hardly recognize yourself. You forced a smile, quickly dropping it when you realized how unbelievable it looked. You sighed.

The feeling was reminiscent to the night of the wedding. Only this time you made the decision. You made this choice. You loved Wanda. You wanted to be with Wanda. She was your daylight. You loved her. You just needed to get out of this rut.

The mantra looped in your mind as you made your way downstairs and into the living room. You smiled slightly when you saw Wanda curled up on the couch, an old sitcom playing on the screen in front of her.

“Hey.” You said, getting her attention, before you took a seat next to her. “What are you watching?”

She smiled back at you, but it was soft. Sad even. “I think we should break up.” Wanda replied suddenly, ignoring your question.

“What?’ You sputtered in shock at her words. If your heart wasn’t already broken, you were sure it would have been now.

Wanda reached a hand over to soothingly stroke your cheek. “Y/n. I love you.”

You placed your hand over hers to keep her there. To anchor yourself. “If you love me, why are you leaving me?”

A sigh fell from her lips as a single tear rolled down her cheek. “Because you made the wrong choice.” She whispered.

Her thumb soothingly running along your cheek bone did nothing to ease the chaos in your mind. “What do you mean? I lo-”

“You’re not in love with me.” Wanda interrupted quietly. “I know that we would be happy, and I can see us spending the rest of our lives together… but you weren’t meant for me.”

Tears prickled your eyes as you stared helplessly into the beautiful emeralds that you’d come to adore. “I choose you though, Wanda. I want you.”

The tears that fell down her cheeks made you want to scream. You never wanted to hurt Wanda when all she had done was love you, yet you had still managed to do it anyway.

“Who you want and who you need are sometimes two different people.” She said sadly. “It would be selfish of me to keep you when I know your heart is with Leigh.”

You gently wiped away her tears. “But Wanda, I-”

“I’m setting you free, Y/n.” The words hit you and you recoiled slightly. She licked her lips as she seemed to contemplate her next words. “I’m setting you free because I love you and I don’t want you wonder what could have been if you had actually listened to your heart. I’ll be okay.”

All you could do was collapse into her chest, the tears flowing freely and feeling like they would never end. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” You repeated until your voice was horse.

The tears the fell onto your neck made you weep more as Wanda stroked your hair. Both of you allowing yourself to relish in the embrace. As much as you tried to fight the knowledge, Wanda was right. It was Leigh. Even if you desperately wished it was Wanda, you couldn’t change the composition of your heart.

You loved Wanda, but you’d never be able to match the love she gave you. Not when the vast majority of your heart would always be in the hands of another as long as you were breathing. It wouldn't be fair.

Two years away just taught you how to muffle the way your heart still screamed out her name.

After what must have been an hour, Wanda pulled away, her eyes still distraught. “Remember that night when you said that we can chose what to define ourselves as?” You nodded slightly, your mind drifting to the night you spent together looking at the stars. A fond memory. “Don’t let yourself be defined by your fear… As much as it breaks my heart to say this, go get her. Let yourself be defined by love. Don’t let the end of us be in vain.”

You swallowed thickly. “I do love you, Wanda.”

She smiled weakly at you. “I know. I love you, too.” Wanda pressed a soft kiss to your forehead and you closed your eyes at the contact. “I should go now.”

When you opened your eyes, your heart clenched in your chest at the sight of her. The sight of her pain. “I’m sorry, Wanda.” You repeated again.

She shook her head slightly. “I’ll be okay.” As she made her way to the front door, she turned to face you. “Learning to forgive ourselves and others because we haven’t chosen wisely is what makes us human. We make mistakes. You and Leigh have made mistakes. Don’t let the fear from the past ruin the future.”

“I won’t.” You whispered, she sent one last weak smile your way before leaving. The door closing behind her sent a new influx of tears rolling down your cheeks as you tried desperately to process what had just happened.

________________________

After the talk with Wanda, it took you several days to work up the courage to reach out to Leigh again. The fear of the past and the fear that you had ruined the future still kept you up at night and made it almost impossible to function. You had to try though. You couldn’t let her slip away without her knowing that it was her… Even if she didn’t want you anymore. She deserved to know that her love wasn’t in vain. That she was right. It was always going to be her.

A quiet curse slipped past your lips when your call when straight to voicemail and a quick glance at your text messages further confirmed what you had already suspected. You were blocked. You couldn’t even blame her because when the roles were reversed you fell off the face of her earth entirely.

Your heart dropped at the thought that you would be forced to live through the same outcome once again. Stuck in the cruel cycle of tragic timing.

Except you wouldn’t let that happen again. You couldn’t. You refused to let her be the one that got away. Never before had a decision been clearer to you. Once the walls fell, everything else came crashing down around them.

As you ran around your house searching for the keys to your car you pulled up Jules’ contact and hit call hoping that she would answer. After several rings you were sure the attempt was fruitless when-

“What could you possibly want, Y/n?”

You winced at the bite in Jules’ words. Sometimes you forgot how punishing Shaw’s could be when they wanted to. “I just-… Is Leigh there? I think I’m blocked.”

“For good reason.” Jules snapped. “She just stopped crying. And I don’t mean a couple of tears because she was sad. I’m talking about collapsing and sobbing at the sky tears.”

Tears began falling down your cheeks with Jules’ words. You clenched your eyes shut to push through. “Jules, I’m sorry. I need to make this right. Please. Help me make this right.” You took a shaky breath. “Is she home? Can I see her?”

“We’re leaving, Y/n.”

The world stopped spinning. You were sure of it. “What?” You choked out.

“We’re leaving.” Jules repeated, her tone softer. “I’m going to Vietnam and Leigh decided to come with me. I don’t know how long we’ll be gone.”

Your knees felt like they would give out under the weight of her words. “When?”

There was a brief moment of silence. “Today. We’re leaving in a few minutes actually.” A lump built in your throat because you couldn’t believe that you lost her. Again. And you were entirely to blame.

“Jules-”

“I have to go now. I’m sorry, Y/n. Take care of yourself.”

Before you could get another word out the dial tone filled your ears. “No.” You mumbled to yourself. “No, no, no.”

Grabbing your keys, you sprinted out the door, breaking several laws to get to Leigh’s house. You had to see her. To tell her that she was right. That no one else made sense. It was always her from the very beginning and it would always be her until the very end.

Your heart was Leigh Shaw and it didn’t matter how hard you tried to push her out, you couldn’t. You’d spend the rest of your life with her name etched into every part of your soul. She was in your veins and there was no way you’d ever get her out. You didn’t want to. Not when you finally knew that she loved you too. Not when you were finally ready to face your fears and take the leap of faith.

A loud curse slipped past your lips when you were a block away from Leigh only to see the road blocked off from some unnecessary LA construction. That wasn’t going to stop you.

You could run the rest of the way. You’d crawl there if you had to.

Quickly parking your car off the side of the road you stepped out and began sprinting in the direction of the house. Hoping and praying with everything within yourself that you weren’t too late.

The sight that greeted you when you finally made it to the house made your heart stop. You slowed to a stop. Leigh’s mother was making her way back into the house after waving to a car that had already made it half way up the street. Even sprinting you wouldn’t be able to catch it.

You were too late.

Leigh would become your greatest what-if. No matter how hard you tried it seemed the universe was adamant about keeping you two apart. The timing of the car in the distance proving that more than anything.

Except this time you had no one to blame but yourself.

With a heavy heart, you dropped your head and turned around. You couldn’t bear to see the car disappear from sight. Taking with it the love of your life and the one thing you never got right.

Desperately you fought back a sob, as you began your slow trek back in the direction you came from. The hole in your chest making the task feel almost impossible. You just wanted to be alone and wallow in the misery that was a cause of your own indecision.

Everything around you quickly faded into nothing as your body went numb. The feeling reminiscent from the night of her wedding when you lost her the first time… only this was worse. So much worse. Your heartbreak was caused by your own hands and it was your burden to bear alone. You could have been happy.

Almost. Maybe. Perhaps. So close. Could have. That’s all you had ever been with Leigh and it seemed that you were destined to finish that way as well.

Heartbreak would be her name, echoing over and over again in your mind until the end of time.

“Y/N! Y/N!”

Your heart leapt in your chest at the sound as you quickly turned. The sight rendered you immobile because there was Leigh. Not in the car. Not disappearing in the distance. Not in another country. There. Running at you with tears streaming down her cheeks.

The ability to breath became almost impossible as she got closer and closer. Then suddenly she was where she was always supposed to be. In your arms.

Her tears soaked through your shirt as she openly cried into your chest and you could do nothing but allow your tears to flow as well as you just held one another tightly.

As if you were both scared any movement would make the other disappear.

“I love you.” You gasped in her hair. “I love you so much and I’m so sorry. I was scared. I don’t expect anything back. You don’t even need to reply. I just needed you to know that I love you, Leigh Shaw. I always have and now I know that I always will.”

Leigh pulled back slightly to stare at you with parted lips, her watery eyes searching yours. “I love you, too.” She breathed out, giving you a watery smile. “That was just the end of the chapter, not the end of our story.”

Your heart soared, and you gave her a smile of your own. Because finally… finally. There was no one running away, you were just running towards one another like you always should have been.

Like two magnets, you were both drawn into a passionate kiss. The kind of kiss that breaks open the sky and steals your breath away.

The kiss showed you that every other kiss you’d had in your life had been wrong.

Her fingers slid into your hair, pulling you closer, as close as physically possible. You were sure your heart had exploded under her touch. All you wanted was Leigh. The feeling of her in your arms – all of her – pressed flush to you. It was right, and your heart had never felt more whole.

The moment was interrupted by a hand lightly tapping your face. You and Leigh pulled apart with matching expressions of confusion, your arms still wrapped tightly around one another. “Hi, yeah, did you forget about something?” Jules asked sarcastically.

Your heart dropped as you looked over at Leigh, remembering the fact that she was leaving. “Jules, I-” Leigh began.

Jules face broke out in a smile. “I was kidding. Don’t even worry about it” She waved a hand dismissively. “You were planning on buying your ticket when we got to LAX anyway.”

You could feel Leigh lean into you in relief, her head tucked just under your chin. “You’re not mad?”

“Of course not. I’ve been waiting for you two idiots to admit you were in love since I was five.” You smiled, feeling a blush creep up your neck. “Besides... now no one will judge me about how I do things on the trip. I'm kind of relieved.”

You chuckled as you absently ran a hand up and down Leigh’s back. “I resent that.” Leigh mumbled.

“But do you deny it?” You asked teasingly.

There was a short pause. “No... but I resent it.” You could feel her press a kiss to your collarbone and you smiled.

For a moment the three of you stood in comfortable silence. “Leigh?” Jules called.

“Mhm?” She mumbled into your neck.

“I’m happy for you…” She paused and looked at you meaningfully. “For both of you. I think this is where you both have always belonged.”

Leigh lifted her head and smiled back at Jules. Your heart fluttered at the sight. “Yeah. I think so too. How about you?” She asked as she looked at you with glimmering eyes.

You melted under her gaze. The sharp edges faded away. “I think so.” You breathed out, smiling lovingly back at her.

Jules clapped and you both turned your heads to look at her. “Alright, kids. Don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone. Like elope or something.” She pointed warningly at Leigh. “I’m serious. I have dibs on maid of honor. You can’t take that moment from me because I’ll be out of the country.”

You laughed awkwardly as Jules got back into the car and drove off. “I think Jules is planning our wedding for us and we aren’t even official yet.”

Leigh stroked your cheek tenderly. You felt every nerve ending in your body burst at the simple touch because of the love in her eyes when she did it. “Well, I don’t know when you’ll be ready for titles, but I hope you know I don’t plan on letting you go again.”

She leaned in, so her lips were ghosting over yours. You smiled. “I don’t plan on letting you go either.”

With a smile, Leigh connected your lips again and you lost yourselves in one another.

And when Leigh proposed to you a year later you said yes without hesitation because while there weren’t many things in life you were certain of, you would always be certain of her. You loved her and you didn't plan on letting her go.

And with that... we have concluded with the Leigh/ Wanda story. I would just like to thank each and every one of you from the bottom of my heart for reading this story and being so passionate about it. I would not have done it without the support from all of you.

I loved each essay I got defending the girls and every single comment that you all made defending your position. I am a little heartbroken to see this story come to an end because as much as I love my other stories, this is my favorite thing I've ever written.

Anyway, sorry for getting sappy. Please let me know all your thoughts and comments I'm so excited/ nervous to hear what you all think! I hope you enjoyed taking this journey with me.

p.s. shout out to @sokoalex and @abimess for helping me find the Leigh gif!

Tag list:

@khiaraaa-in-spacee // @causeitswhatjesuswouldfreakingdo // @halobaby // @madamevirgo // @aimezvousbrahms // @trikruismybitch // @marvels-writings // @izalesbean // @imdreamingblo // @i-choose-you-cyndaquil // @helloalycia // @scarlets-maximoff // @cantcontroltheirfear // @women-am-i-right // @funnysoldier // @myfavoriteficss // @imapotatao // @imagine-reblog // @blackxwidowsxwife // @purplemeetsblue // @cristin-rjd // @ravens-ss // @legaypandaboi // @myperfectlovepoem // @diaryoflife // @stupidsapphicsstuff //@ouat2017 // @abimess // @wellsayhelloaagin // @mionemymind

#wanda #wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda marvel #wanda maximov #wanda maximoff fic #wanda maximoff imagine #wanda x reader #wanda maximoff x you #wanda x y/n #sorry for your loss #leigh shaw #leigh shaw x reader #leigh shaw imagine #elizabeth olsen #elizabeth olsen x you

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mc-lukanette · 3 years

Text

Marinette tried not to be obvious with her annoyance, but it was difficult when she knew that Lila had come to the Liberty specifically to irritate her. It wasn't even her paranoia creeping up, as Lila had made it clear from their first day of face-to-face interaction that she wanted to make Marinette's life miserable. The worst part was that everyone else either believed her or tolerated her, meaning Marinette looked unreasonable no matter what she did to combat it.

She figured she should've known that Luka would be Lila’s next target. The Liberty had always felt like somewhat of a safe haven - funny, considering who owned it - so it had only been a matter of time until Lila had heard enough to decide to show up there.

"Oh, she seemed so curious to actually be on a houseboat! She's only ever been on yachts and stuff before! How could we say 'no'?

Marinette tried to keep her lips shut tight so the gritting of her teeth wasn't seeable to anyone. The best she could do was watch from afar and keep any unkind comments internal while vaguely fantasizing about being Ladybug and dumping Lila in the garbage where she belonged.

Luka, to his credit, didn't seem to take Lila's bait like everyone else. She'd sought him out and he technically listened to her (as she lied about all the music people she knew and all the connections she could give him), but he was mostly occupied with tuning his guitar, only giving her a vague noise every now and then to signal that he was listening.

It was one of Marinette's few joys of the day, which made it twice as infuriating when Lila ruined it.

"Anyway, Luka," Lila added, her voice saccharine and fake, "I really hope you and I can become great friends."

Luka's eyebrow twitched.

"And don't worry, I would never force you. I know there are some people like that, who want to make everything go their way—"

Marinette knew it was a jab at her even though she definitely wasn't that kind of person; from Lila's point of view though, of course she'd think that.

Lila continued, "but I'd never do that to you, okay? I promise!"

For the first time since she'd been talking to him, Luka turned to her, his expression somewhere between neutral and the annoyance he showed at listening to XY's "version" of Kitty Section's music. "Can you please—"

He didn't get to finish that sentence, as Lila suddenly leaned in to kiss him. Luka jerked away the moment it registered with him, but it was already too late; the contact had been made.

All the anger that had been stewing in Marinette's stomach bubbled to the surface. She stormed over, her body language confrontational as she asked, "What do you think you're doing?!"

The outburst had gotten the attention of the other girls. Though they hadn't seen it, what happened was obvious given the way Luka was covering his mouth.

Lila turned to face Marinette, sinking to that vulnerable state she used so much whenever she got caught. "I-I didn't mean to! I meant to kiss his cheek and he turned too quickly."

It was a lie, and Marinette knew it. Lila had intentionally said things to make Luka look at her so she could kiss him, all to irritate Marinette.

"You see..." Lila pressed her palm to her cheek. "I-I thought a cheek kiss would be okay. You don't seem like the type of person who would be close to someone like him, and everyone told me that you do it all the time."

Marinette was fuming at the implication, feeling personally insulted at the idea that she and Luka weren't close.

And they'd told her. Her friends had been gossiping about her to Lila, or at least telling her details, which Marinette herself had definitely not consented to.

She went to toss a glare her friends' way, but they were already rushing forward to assure Lila that everything was okay, with Marinette having to step away or risk getting knocked back with the way they formed around her.

"M-maybe I need to re-learn French customs. I spent so long away from the country and other places have—"

Marinette wasn't listening anymore. She knew how this went and didn't want to be around to see another repeat of it, nor her friends potentially shouting at her. She turned away with a frustrated exhale, speed-stomping away and going up the stairs to head outside.

Passing by the cabin, she went into the greenhouse-esque area with all of the larger plants, plopping down on the long flower-patterned seating with a heavy sigh. She'd fallen right into Lila's trap, again, and couldn't help being angry at the whole situation.

Going after her was one thing, but Luka? And to kiss him like that on top of trying to lure him in with her deceit? Marinette knew deep down that she had a right to be upset at Lila's actions, but the way she reacted to it just ended up making Lila look like the victim instead of Luka. Had she failed him?

She groaned into her clasped hands, imagining that Luka must've thought that she looked like a fool shouting like that. She liked to think that she would've done things differently had she been able to do it again, but she was still angry and honestly just wanted to go off on Lila again.

She didn't move, though briefly considered going home. After all, it'd be pointless going back downstairs, as she'd probably just end up being glared at and blamed for Lila being upset. Luka probably didn't want to see her either after that display anyway.

As if her concerns had summoned him, she suddenly heard his voice call out to her from nearby. "Marinette?"

She stiffened, then lowered her hands enough to peek at him. When none of the negative emotions she expected showed on his face, she lowered them the rest of the way.

"Are you okay?" he asked gently.

She straightened, jaw slack that's that what he was concerned about. "Am I okay? What about you?!" She gestured wildly to him. "That—that akuma-luring harpy just kissed you!"

She realized what she said and covered her mouth, knowing that it was a much more direct insult than she usually would've gone with. Luka, however, tried to suppress a laugh from it, snorting loudly into his hand.

"I—" He cut himself off, still chuckling too much to speak. After a few seconds, he took a breath to calm down, then gave her a calm smile and continued, "I washed my mouth out, just to make sure."

Marinette tried to keep her negative emotions at the forefront, but then she was trying to suppress her laughter as well. She almost felt bad about it, but the wide grin on Luka's face showed that he'd fully intended for her to have that reaction. He walked over, taking a seat down next to her and leaning forward to maintain eye contact.

He waited until she quieted herself down with a final squeak that he asked again, "Really, are you okay?"

The smile she had on from laughter faded, though her spirits were still much higher than before. "Not really. She—she's always doing that." She glanced at him. "Let me guess, they're catering to her?"

He nodded. "They're planning on having lunch without you since you—" He made a face, clearly displeased. "—'made her so upset.'" He stared out of the glass opposite of them. "I wasn't going to join them."

"You didn't have to do that," she said, though her voice was soft from being touched by the gesture.

He gave her a smile. "I know, but I'd rather have lunch with you than with everyone else and that—" He smirked. "—'harpy.'"

Marinette tried to bite back a smile of her own, but couldn't. Hearing the pure-hearted Luka say an insult so brazenly, even if he was just parroting her own, was too funny not to smile at.

"Thanks~" she said gratefully.

"I should be thanking you," he argued. He leaned back in his seat, but didn't stop looking at her. "For being so upset on my behalf."

She blushed, looking away with both shyness and embarrassment. "I-I was really loud though."

"You play your song for everyone to hear, Marinette. I love that about you."

She blushed deeper, mentally cursing his smoothness. "How are you so okay with this?"

"I'm not," he replied, "not really, but..." He shrugged. "That kiss didn't mean anything to me. It wasn't real."

She looked over at him, frowning. "T-that was your first though, wasn't it?"

His brows rose in surprise, his face telling her everything she needed to know even before he responded. "...Well, yeah."

Now that she'd had it officially confirmed, Marinette bristled. "It's not right!" She huffed and turned to him, throwing her arms out. "Your first kiss is supposed to be special and with someone you really love! It's not supposed to just be stolen from you like that!"

He touched a hand to his chest, clearly touched by her passionate anger. She turned red and forced herself to look away from him, finding it hard to stay angry when he stared at her that way.

"...And I know you were already pretty upset with her, I could see it," she explained, "so it wasn't like I felt like I had to get angry for you, but still. She doesn't care what anyone thinks and I'm mad at her for kissing you like that and I'm mad at me because she only did it to get on my nerves and I know I shouldn't be mad at me because she's just mad that I won't fall for her lies but I'm mad anyway because I still let her rile me up when that's exactly what she wanted." Burying her face in her hands, she whined and added, "I guess I wasn't jealous at least - not in that way anyway - since I'd never want to do anything to you without your permission like she did, but I know she meant for me to get to jealous because I just—"

She cut herself off, the words clogging up her throat and forcing her to swallow them. She raked her fingers through her hair, mentally debating with herself if she really wanted to tell Luka everything.

But of course she did. Not only did he deserve it, but she felt responsible for her feelings and it was her fault that things happened the way they did, even if it was indirect on her part.

"I..." She closed her eyes and sighed, her voice lowering itself to a whisper. Hunching over, she wrung her hands together and admitted quietly, "I wanted to be your first kiss..."

Silence took over the conversation from there, but she understood. She just dropped a bomb on him and couldn't expect him to reply right away, so she let the seconds drag on without any judgment on her part.

Eventually, she heard the sound of Luka sliding himself closer, so close that the side of his hand briefly touched her leg. He inhaled softly like he was about to speak, stopped, then tried again.

"You... you what?"

She steeled herself up, the words only slightly easier to say than before. "I wanted to be your first kiss. I-I'm selfish, and I know that. Everyone knows it, and that's why—"

His hand touched her leg again. She briefly jumped in surprise, then realized moments later that the touch was intentional this time, as he'd fully settled his hand on her leg. Fighting against her nerves, she turned to look at him and saw how relaxed his expression was.

"You can be selfish."

"W-what?"

"It makes me happy. It means that—" He paused, his cheeks tinting pink as he smiled wide. "—you really want me."

It almost sounded like a question the way he said it, his eyes distant only in a way that implied that he's still absorbing what she'd said.

Her chest filled with hope as she squeaked out, "I...I do. Of course I do." Looking down at the hand on her lap, she placed her own onto it and gave it a squeeze. "But..."

The hope twisted and fought with the shame attempting to take its place, memories of the past coming back to haunt her. She averted her gaze fully, staring off at nothing in particular. "I-I can't give you my first kiss." She squeezed his hand tighter, as if that made anything better. "There was this akuma, and I had to... I mean—"

She felt his hand shifting in hers and immediately worried that she'd squeezed it too hard. She loosened her grip, only to feel his hand turn itself around to hold her hand back, pressing their palms together. The motion made her look back and make eye contact with him.

"Then that wasn't real either, was it?" he asked gently. Giving a fond glance down at their joined hands, he added, "This might be more Rose's type of music than mine, but I think the only kisses that have to matter are the ones that you put meaning into playing."

She gaped. It was still registering with her that he was not only okay with her crushing on him, but still returned it. "S-so... it's not any different? You'd let me kiss you anyway?"

"I never thought about first kisses or second kisses, or any verses beyond that," he told her, placing his other hand on top of their joined ones. "I only care about your kisses."

Marinette's cheeks turned crimson, and she nearly burst into happy laughter. She settled for beaming at him, still amazing at how easily he could ease all of her worries and doubts.

"Then... I'll give you all of them."

She shifted, continuing to hold his hand while her other went to his face. He leaned into her touch, making her all the more eager to pull him in. He didn't protest when she did, his hand moving away from their joined ones to grab her shoulder.

They kissed. Marinette was momentarily surprised when Luka's lips seemed to have a hint of wetness to them, only to realize that he'd meant it when he said that he'd washed his mouth out. She giggled mid-kiss, positively delighted to have someone like him, and he responded to the sound with a soft noise of content. She stroked his cheek with her thumb, then slid her hand down to his neck to urge him closer. He did the same with her shoulder, pulling her in and deepening the contact.

It took a few seconds of internal debate for her to convince herself to break the kiss to talk to him, and she enjoyed the slight whine he made as she did so.

"Better than Lila?" she asked, knowing the answer but wanting to hear it regardless.

"Definitely," he replied without hesitation, leaning in to touch his forehead to hers.

She hummed. "Mm, good." She pulled him back in for a smaller, quicker kiss that was no less loving than the last. Full of confidence, she felt it safe to say, "I should always be playing my boyfriend's favorite song."

His reaction was immediate, his eyes sparkling and his smile wide. She blushed red, overwhelmed and half-regretting saying anything. He was just too much.

"What is it?" he asked when she averted her gaze.

"P-please stop smiling like that," she whined.

"I can't," he said. More to himself than her, he added cheerfully, "I'm your boyfriend."

"Luka!"

#lukaneventte: No Context November #Flower Arrangement Shipping #Pro LukaMari #Lukanette

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thoughtfullyrainynightmare · 2 years

Text

Money and Loyalty

Black Clover mafia!AU

I was hit hard by brainrot today because of fanart I saw and I... had to.... So. Have this. I might turn it into a series, but for now I just need to put this somewhere. I’m also trying a bit of something new with this piece.

Also, if you want Yami mafia!AU @bowandcurtsey has a wonderful series with Yami x reader in a mafia!AU

Warnings: It is mafia!AU so everything one might expect with it. Mentions of blood, swearing, implies violence, talk about death, implied depression and suicidal thoughts, suggestive content (maybe smut later on, but this part is purely suggestive), mentions of weapons and fighting. *Proceed with caution.*

Reader: Intended female reader at 1st person point of view

Length: ~2.2k

It’s humid. And cold. Though nothing more could be expected from a damp, abandoned warehouse at the docks.

At least I think it’s the docks. The air is… far too humid for it to be in the city. And besides, what kind of a warehouse of this size would sit abandoned in the middle of the city? Though… it’s not like it’s actually abandoned. Just my luck huh? Well… not exactly. Luck has nothing to do with it, I suppose. I just had to-, had to! Try and be quick about it. You’d think that all these years of being a part of the Purple Orca’s, you’d learn a thing or two.

Actually, I can’t say that I hadn’t. Gueldre don taught that all that matters is money. Because loyalty can be bought, with money or blood. Currency is flexible like that. It’s not necessarily all about the green, the gold, or the plastic.

A small smile curled onto my lips as I thought about it, the amusing way of how Gueldre talked about bank cards as plastic. He was right, it wasn’t about that. To be fair, I didn’t know what it was about. Maybe it was just about being tired.

Maybe I was just so… so god damn tired of this shit. The mafia. This city. The city of Clover was beyond saving. But there was no reason to think it’d be any better anywhere else. Diamond City was just as bad, maybe worse. There it was just the city council being infiltrated by the big players in town, which then turned the city into their personal playground. There were a few, smaller, other gangs, but they all died down, or migrated, little by little.

Spade City… there was hardly any organized crime. It sounds nice when you say it like that, but the good thing about ‘organized crime’ is that it’s ‘organized’. In Spade it’s just all the little players trying to climb on top. The city is in chaos, the last I heard. And I have no interest in confirming the rumours myself.

Heart City… Nothing comes out of Heart City. If one manages to enter in the first place. So, what goes in Heart City, what happens in Heart City, stays in Heart City. It just sounds like one big gamble. Even if they say that the top dog there is a donna, not a don.

Who knows what she had to do to get there… And women… are savage. I should know.

I smiled again at the thought, still keeping my head low.

My hands were tied behind the chair on which I sat. Or barely sat. Slumped forward was the right way to put it. The rope, it was so rough, coarse, and it kept digging into my skin every time I as much as tried moving my hands.

These guys, they were no first timers. There was no wriggling away from these, not even with these wrists of mine. Plus… they took all my weapons.

Or.. well. With one exception, but there is no way of getting to it as long as I’m bound anyhow.

The only strange thing is with my legs. They’re bound too, but they’re bound together, and that package is tied to one leg of the chair. My knees are at a slant, and tied to the opposite side of the chair from my ankles. This weird ass knot, as if they’d be forcing my legs to be ‘lady like’.

The thought was almost enough to make me laugh. ‘Cause there are no ladies in this city.

…Yeah. There’s no ladies in this city.

Then again… maybe I should laugh. Maybe this would be over quicker, if I laughed.

Maybe… then I wouldn’t be so… so tired anymore.

“You seem to think that you can just sneak in, and spy on our operations,” the voice was low, commanding. Like taffeta. Velvet. A silken heavy fabric.

It was almost unreal. Maybe it was unreal. Maybe this was all a dream, from which I’d wake up to a nightmare. And that soft, heavy, voice of authority was just a dream; something I wanted to hear.

“And you seem amused by the fact that you got this far,” the voice continued; almost as if an afterthought. But this time there was a harshness to it, as if insulted.

As I lift my head, I see a broad back. I see a glimpse of light auburn hair, though given the rather poor lighting of the room, it must’ve been more like fire than auburn. The flames of a campfire, late at night. Like those treasured nights of childhood when I went camping with my father, just to see stars. A strange memory. Or, rather, a wonderful, good memory, at a strange time.

I know who it is. God damn it. Of course I know who it is. I just… didn’t expect this to be so big. This was supposed to be a side operation for them. Something I could handle. Because, though it doesn’t add up to much, I am one of the best middle rank soldata in all of Purple Orcas. Or maybe one of the lowest in the pecking order, out of the top rank. It depends who you ask really. Gueldre never says those things. Not to those who don’t matter anyhow.

And it just had to-, it had to be the Vermillion don’s operation I crashed.

There’s enough stories on the streets to make a lot of the lesser ranking gangs stay clear from the Crimson Lion Kings. The regular foot soldiers are tough to beat as they are, but the Don? They say that he has made a pact with fire itself. That his eyes are like brimstones, and his discipline as hard and relentless as granite. It does not waver, does not budge. They say that so many people have tried to kill him, but all have failed. And all that tried, died by his hand. Personally.

One guy got close once. The don of Golden Dawn. But there’s barely been sightings of him ever since then. Some say that he’s really dead, and that he paid for the attempt with his life, like the rest. The top dog of the most feared gang, was outmatched.

And that’s just the don. The donna. Don Fuegoleon Vermillion’s sister was even more fearsome. Though some suspected that it was more of a fable than anything else. Those people most often went to say that the donna was a fable to begin with, because Crimson Lion Kings barely had women in their ranks. So, for someone to have reached top tier, would have been nearly impossible. ‘A proper demon from hell’, they said.

But the man in front of me, of whom I could only catch a glimpse, was very real.

“Maybe because it is,” I replied, finally straightening my posture, somehow finding the strength to do so. “Quite frankly I didn’t think that it’d be so easy to get this close.” I didn’t really know why I said that, eye’s half lidded, mouth agape just a tiny bit. My head still felt dizzy, and my lips felt swollen. And my hair must’ve been a mess.

There was a pause as his eyes burned into me. It seemed like he was trying to peer right down to my soul. But his eyes weren’t brimstones. They were… I’m not what they were… A shade of purple? Or black? It was so difficult to tell in the lack of light.

“Arrogant of you to say that,” he commented, while again turning his back to me; his hand beginning to undo the buttons of his shirt. And as he did, one by one, the lower the white fabric glided over his well tone, muscular, back.

God… in some other reality I would have loved to run my fingers over his skin, over those muscles, light as a feather. Just my fingertips dancing over him as I whisper sweet nothings to his ear. His breathing would be low, and steady, peaceful.

But that reality wasn’t this one. This reality was right here and now, and I’m going to die. Though I’ll first suffer, and then I’ll get to die.

“No…” I spoke with a hushed tone, which came out more tantalizing than I anticipated. Maybe it was just being light headed. “Just realistic.”

“Realistic?” He asked with a quirked eyebrow, now turning around to face me without a shirt. But I can’t really blame him. It’s difficult to get blood off of white fabric. Comes with the job really.

“Mhm,” I nodded, barely succeeding. “There is no reason why a single person should get this close. Other than being careless y’know. Though, you did do a pretty good job at downplaying the operation, which is why the whole… solo mission. But it doesn’t excuse the fact that I am here.” It was cocky of me to say that. It really was. But it was also true. There was no reason for me being here, right now.

“You have a loose tongue, it seems,” he commented with that sultry tone of his, now standing in front of me.

“Not really,” I commented. “Me telling you what you did wrong, is just saying out loud something you already know. It’s not really giving you new information.”

He paused. The men at the side shifted their weight, almost as if they wanted to say something, do something. But. They didn’t dare. Not while their Boss was there.

“Then maybe you’d tell me what your boss did wrong,” he suggested. But I know that it’s not a suggestion. It’s a command, dressed as a suggestion.

“I’m afraid I can’t do that.”

“Why is that?”

I could see movement from the corner of my eye. Not clearly enough to know what was going to happen, but a part of me didn’t even want to know. All I wanted to focus on was the man in front of me; asking a question to which I really didn’t have an answer to.

Because why, why indeed did I not want to sell out on my boss? He’d do it for me, if there was enough to gain from it. Because money is the only thing that mattered. He would sell me out like a cheap kazoo.

“It’s not about him,” I replied. Though I wasn’t sure if it was the truth or a lie.

“Then who is it about?”

There was a clang behind me. Metallic sound that bounced off of the warehouse walls, and it made me swallow. Whatever courage there was left, was imaginary; a figmentation I so desperately wanted to believe in.

I couldn’t help but think how quick it’d be.

“Me,” I replied against better judgement. Sometimes I had to be dumb like that.

“What about you?”

“What does it matter?”

“Why is this not about your boss?”

“Because it isn’t!” I protested. My head. I’m not sure if it’s lighter or heavier than it was before.

“Tell me!” He raised his voice. The first time he really raised his voice.

“Because!” I began, tossing and turning the words, the syllables in my mouth with my tongue. “I don’t… want to be like him…” I admitted.

Fuck it. This is when I start being honest with myself after joining the mafia? As I’m about to die?

Though… then again. If I’m ever going to start being honest with myself, this is about as good of a time as any.

“To him everything can be bought. Absolutely everything. Everyone, everything, has a price. The only thin I can do, to not assign a price, is to refuse to sell. Loyalty… is the only thing I have,” I spoke with a whisper, a hushed tone. There’s a good chance that only he heard. Not that it mattered.

There was a moment of silence. It was so long I had to wonder if in that moment they actually had put a bullet to my head, because I was damaged goods, and I didn’t feel a thing. “You’re loyal to the wrong person,” he finally stated, with syllables that were… I’m not sure how they were. There wasn’t… exactly pity in there, but there was an undertone of something soft… That taffeta or velvet I had heard before.

“That’s not your decision,” I retaliated.

“It’s not,” he agreed. “It’s yours,” he continued while kneeling down in front of me, just to meet my gaze as my head had lowered back down.

And his eyes… they were purple. They are purple. I don’t know about the shade still.

“But it doesn’t mean that I’m wrong,” he continued.

This time… in that tone… There was something-, something I hadn’t heard before. Despite having heard so many different versions of scorn, mock, jealousy, malice, even guilt and pity… There was none in that tone. It was like being back in those careless summer nights of youth when I could just look at the stars.

It was a tone I didn’t know.

#fuegoleon x reader #black clover fanfiction

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hercleverboy · 3 years

Note

What about fluff 3 and 36 from the prompt list? With Spencer of course 😁

I would like to apologise for the fact that it took me so long to get to this ahshdhagah ok ok

wc ↠ 1.2k

Fluff #3 ↠ “She doesn’t compare to you. No one does.”

Fluff #36 ↠ “Because I fell for you, isn’t it obvious?”

She sighed, placing down her coffee cup on the desk. Once again, her focus was not on the evidence board in front of her, but rather on the pretty brunette sat in the chair adjacent to hers. Dr Spencer Reid, the BAU’s resident genius- and the man she had been hopelessly in love with since she’d joined the team a year prior.

They were in LA on a stalker case, regarding well-known actress Lila Archer. She seemed to have taken quite a liking to the young doctor, much to Y/N’s dismay.

A few of the team had picked up on Y/N’s clenched jaw when Hotch had sent Reid with Lila back to her home as a protective detail. Morgan had even sent her a smirk, to which she just glared daggers back. The crush that Y/N had on Spencer wasn’t unknown to the team, who numerous times had encouraged her to shoot her shot, but she never had. No matter how many times Elle told her to ‘get on with it’, Y/N could never seem to find the words to say to him.

After solving the case, Y/N was sat alone at the back of the jet, sneaking glances at Spencer, who had curled up and fallen asleep on the sofa. Morgan got up from his seat, moving to the one opposite Y/N. He held a magazine in his hands, placing it down on the table between them with a grin.

“It would appear that Pretty Boy got himself a little lovin’.”

Y/N frowned, looking down at the front cover of the magazine, plastered with pictures of Spencer and Lila, making out in her pool.

A soft ‘Oh’ left Y/N’s lips, as she stared at the images that were splayed over the cover. She looked up, blinking quickly and looking away out the window.

Morgan’s face dropped and he moved the magazine out of sight. “I don’t mean to make you upset, Y/L/N. I’m just trying to encourage you to make a move. He won’t wait forever, you know.”

Y/N nodded as Morgan got up and walked away, her thoughts racing.

Once they’d landed back at the BAU, Y/N had been intending on heading straight home. Though just as she was heading to her car, she realised she’d managed to leave her case notes on the conference room table after their debriefing. With a huff of annoyance, she turned around and headed back up to the bullpen. She grabbed her notes from the conference room, shoving them in her bag before heading back out. That when she noticed Spencer, hunched over at his desk, staring down at a familiar looking magazine with a frown on his face.

She cleared her throat so as not to startle him, giving him a small smile when he looked up at her. She stepped closer to him, nodding toward the magazine. “So uh, Lila Archer huh?”

“Oh. You heard?” Spencer asked, voice quiet.

She nodded, trying not to let it show on her face how much her heart burned with the desire to be his. “You think you’ll see her again?”

He looked back down at the pictures, cheeks flushed. “I-I don’t think so. I’m not sure if she actually- if she liked me? I was trying to explain the concept of transference to her, but I really don’t know.”

Y/N gave a smile, a light-hearted one. “Psh. I’m sure that’s not true. Come on, Spence. Who wouldn’t like you?”

Spencer was silent, unsure what to say.

Fearing that she was making him uncomfortable, she spoke softly. “Well, I’ll leave you to it. I’m sure that a certain blonde celebrity will be waiting for a phone call.” She tried to put on her best playful tone, smiling. Then she turned, making her way to the glass doors of the bullpen.

Before she could get too far, Spencer had jumped up from his seat and caught her wrist in his hand. She turned, looking up at him, but he avoided her eyes.

He took a moment to find his words, keeping his grip on her wrist as he mumbled. “She doesn’t compare to you. No one does.”

Y/N’s throat dried up, lips opening and closing as she searched for something to say. “Me?”

“Yes.” He squeaked, cringing at how he sounded as his eyes finally flicked down to meet hers. “You. It’s- it’s always been you.”

“I don’t understand.” She breathed out. “Why would you want someone like me when you could have someone like her?”

“Because I fell for you. Isn’t it obvious?”

Y/N stared up at him in shock, eyes locked onto his as they searched his golden irises for any hint of deception- she found none.

Spencer had never felt so vulnerable before, so exposed. He began to internally panic at her silence, letting go of her wrist and grabbing his things from his desk, shoving them into his satchel. “I’m sorry, I-I shouldn’t have said anything.”

He picked his coat up from where it hung on the back of his chair, rushing toward the bullpen doors. His heart was pounding so loudly he could hear it in his ears, his cheeks red with embarrassment. God, how was he ever going to work alongside her again? Surely she would want nothing to do with him-

“Spencer! Hold up!”

He froze, shoulders raised as he braced himself for anything and everything. Humiliation, laughter, rejection.

She caught up with him, standing in front of him. His eyes stayed firmly trained on the floor, afraid to meet hers for the fear that it would only confirm what he was so afraid of.

She opened her mouth to say something, anything, but nothing seemed adequate. And so, in a split-second decision, she pushed herself up on her tiptoes and placed a short kiss to his lips. It was over within seconds, with Y/N taking a step back and biting down on her lip, hoping she’d done the right thing.

Y/N could almost hear the cogs turning in his head as he tried to comprehend what had just happened, his voice full of disbelief when he finally spoke. “You-uh, you kissed me.”

“I did.” Silence. “Was that ok?”

“Yes! Yes It was ok- no it was good- great, even!” He scrambled for the right thing to say, making Y/N chuckle quietly. (A sound that was like music to his ears.)

It fell quiet again before Spencer scraped together the last ounce of courage he could muster and asked her quietly, “What does this mean? For- for us?”

Y/N pondered on her words before giving him a small smile. “It means I like you too.”

“You do?”

“Yes.”

“Really?”

“Yes.”

“Oh.”

Her smile grew, looking over at the clock that sat on the wall opposite her. It was getting late. “I should get going.”

“Oh, right, yes! I’ll uh, I can walk you to the elevator, if you’d like?” He asked gently.

“I’d love that.”

When they reached the elevator, she reached forward to press the button to call it, turning back to Spencer who looked so adorably awkward that it made her heart burst. When the doors opened, she asked him quietly. “You coming?”

“No, I’m uh- I’m going to stick around here for a while.”

She nodded, leaning up onto her tiptoes to press a feather-light kiss to his cheek. “I’ll see you tomorrow?” She whispered, to which he nodded eagerly.

When she the elevator doors closed behind her, Spencer stood in the hallway for just a little while longer, grin on his lips as his hand touched the spot on his cheek where the feeling of her lips still lingered.

#kate writes blurbs☘️#spencer reid #spencer reid one shot #spencer reid x reader #spencer x fem!reader #spencer x y/n #matthew gray gubler x reader #matthew gray gubler #mgg x reader #mgg #criminal minds

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invisibleanonymousmonsters · 3 years

Text

All Men Have Limits - IV

Character: Dick Grayson x Reader x Bruce Wayne

Summary: A certain bat believes that Y/N is in way over her head, that she’s too naive to act in her best interest. So, whether she wants it or not, the vigilante family is going to help and protect her before she gets herself killed.

Word Count: 3,800+

Previously on…

As Y/N packed her bags, she was also brainstorming her route once she got to her safe house. She’s just stay there for a couple of nights. Then she’d leave town. Gotham wasn’t safe for her right now. And if she was out of city limits, The Court of Owls had less influence. Though she didn’t doubt they’d send an assassin to the other side of the world to hunt her down.

Y/N looked around her extravagant room.

She doubted she’d ever be back here.

Things were getting…complicated.

It was a cruel reminder for why she kept to herself. People meant drama. Drama meant distractions. And distractions meant she wasn’t focused on the task at hand – which was bringing down the corrupt.

Y/N was just zipping up her duffle when there was a knock on her door.

“Come in!” She turned to see Dick walking in.

He eyed her bag. “What are you doing?”

“I was just about to go pack up my equipment in the cave.”

“No, you’re not. You’re staying here,” he confirmed.

She gave him a repulsed look. “Uhh…No, I am not. This mansion is about to be flooded with unidentified members of The Court.”

“Sure is,” Dick smirked. “But I have a solution.”

He held out his hand to show a bracelet. It looked expensive. The band was gold but there was a giant garnet gemstone at the center of it.

Dick handed it to Y/N.

“You shouldn’t have?” Y/N asked with confusion.

“I called in a favor with an old friend. She’s a magician.”

Y/N tried not to laugh, “A magician?”

Dick gave her a playful glare. “Yeah, a magician. But it’s not tricks and gimmicks. She knows actual magic.” He tapped the gemstone. “When you wear this, you’ll look like a different person. It’s a cloaking spell.”

“Why didn’t you guys suggest this right away?”

Dick sighed. “Bruce isn’t fond of metas and…magic.”

“Wouldn’t it be easier for me to just leave?”

“I would rather have you in disguise with our eyes on you, than have you out of reach,” he explained softly. “When you’re wearing this, all of us will still be able to see the real you. But not anyone else.”

“I don’t want to go to this stupid gala. I’ll just wear this and stay in my room or the cave.”

“Well…that’s the other part,” Dick cleared his throat awkwardly. “You’re gonna be my date.”

Y/N blinked in surprise. She couldn’t remember the last time anyone asked her on any kind of date. Not that Dick even asked. He more so told her.

“That wasn’t exactly a request, Dick.”

“Everyone knows everyone. If you’re by yourself, people will ask too many questions. But if you’re my date, no one will think twice why you’re there.”

“I-I don’t have anything to wear…”

Dick laughed lightly. “Alfred already sent out for a dress and shoes for you.”

“…why do I feel like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman?”

“Come on, Y/N. You know it’s not like that.”

Y/N remained annoyed.

“I’ll be here at your door around 8 tonight, k?” Dick gave her a soft smirk.

“Fine.”

———————

This was just another night for Dick. He’d been dragged to enough of these stupid galas to know the drill: wide smiles, forced laughter, and lay the charm on real thick. With the way this family handled their identities, they could’ve been a family of actors instead of vigilantes.

Dick straightened his cufflinks as he made his way to Y/N’s room.

He could hear the murmur’s of the guest from the ballroom, proving just how many people were attending for the sound to reach him in such a giant manor.

There was a part of Dick that half expected Y/N to be in her usual baggy sweaters and leggings when he opened the door. A silent protest that she wasn’t going to be anyone’s arm candy tonight.

Dick knew he didn’t give her much choice.

When his family had been discussing the situation, Dick tried to off to stay hidden out of sight with Y/N. But Alfred was having none of it. They all knew he took these events rather seriously. Especially one that was started and named after Bruce’s mother.

Dick knocked and turned his back to the door, he double checked there were no guests exploring where they shouldn’t be.

When the door opened, Dick turned around and was stunned to silence.

“Is this bracelet working on you or do I really look that bad?”

Y/N shifted as he stared at her like she’d cast a spell on him.

Dick was seeing Y/N. That was for sure.

“I see the dress fit,” he finally spoke.

What the hell was the matter with him? That’s really what he chose to say?

Though Y/N couldn’t help but laugh at the comment. “That it does.”

Dick woke up a bit and cleared his throat. “You look…beautiful.”

He never had a problem charming women. So why is he suddenly talking like a total cave man?

“Don’t look so surprised,” Y/N call him out teasingly. “Just because I dress like a scrub every day doesn’t mean I don’t know how to clean up.”

His brow furrowed at the first comment. “You’ve never looked like a scrub, Y/N.”

OK. OK. He was getting back to his normal self.

“Well…” Y/N broke eye contact from her bashfulness. “Thank you.”

Dick held out the hook of his arm. “Shall we?”

Y/N inhaled, “Right.”

As soon as she hooked her hand onto Dick’s bicep, a wave of relief washed over her. She wasn’t doing this alone; she was doing this with him at her side.

“So, what’s the the plan here?” Y/N asked nervously.

“The plan is to blend in. Don’t talk to any press. And…” He smirked. “It wouldn’t hurt to try and have a good time.”

“Right. I’ll try to do that while I’m in a room possibly filled with people who want me dead…” Y/N sighed.

“Not ‘possibly.’ There will be.”

Y/N narrowed her eyes at him. “Way to make me feel better, Dick.”

He laughed. “You’ll be fine. I’ll be with you the whole time. Damian, Tim, and Bruce will be there, too. And somehow Alfred convinced Jason to even make an appearance. You’re not in this alone, Y/N.”

“Mhmm,” Y/N answered as they arrived to the party. She didn’t bother hiding that she was still extremely nervous and on edge.

“I did really mean it,” Dick told her quietly.

His tone made Y/N tear her eyes away from the party to look at him. “Really mean what?”

“You look beautiful.”

His words didn’t fumble this time. He was confident and clear, leaving no room for doubt or insincerity.

Y/N gave him a shy smile.

“I’m guessing a drink would make this a bit easier, huh?” Dick offered.

“Yes. Yes, it would.”

Dick guided her to the nearest bar.

All the staff knew what the Wayne family looked like. Which meant the bartended skipped over all other guests and b-lined for Dick when he requested a drink, and then looked to Y/N to order what she wanted.

There was loud laughter from a group of people near them. Followed by a voice that Y/N thought she knew, but still sounded a bit off.

When Y/N looked over, she realized it was Bruce talking to a group of guests, who were absolutely fawning over him. He was smiling and laughing, and taking very frequent sips of his drink.

This was Bruce Wayne: the character. Charming playboy, debatable narcissist, and spoiled brat. But in the eyes of Gotham’s elite, he could do no wrong.

Y/N wondered if Bruce had ever considered bringing her as his date. ‘Don’t you start,’ said a voice inside her head.

Dick followed her eye line.

“Doesn’t it make you nauseous watching him like this?” Y/N mumbled.

“Not Dick. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree,” Jason answered.

Dick and Y/N turned to see Jason and Damian.

Yes, Dick adopted Bruce’s charm. But he didn’t rip himself into pieces, building characters that were unrecognizable to the people who actually knew him. Dick’s charm was a part of his personality. His flirtations came naturally. But he only used them on people he intended on building a genuine connection with. (Though Nightwing was guilty of using said charm on targets during missions a few times.)

Y/N looked around for Tim and saw him talking to what appeared to be serious businessman. He was the only one carrying on the legacy at Wayne Enterprises. If any of the boys needed to be here, it was Tim.

“Shouldn’t you guys be making rounds or something?” Y/N asked.

Jason shrugged. “People only cared about us when we were cute kids. Now we’re just spoiled adults who are the product of nepotism.” He smirked down at Damian. “But this one isn’t out of the clear yet.”

“Don’t remind me,” Damian groaned. “At the last one, a woman pinched my cheeks as if I was some toddler.”

“I thought I was about to watch him murder someone,” Dick added.

“I wanted to,” Damian clarified.

Dick started talking to Jason about something.

It provided Y/N the perfect window with the youngest Wayne.

“I’ll sneak you alcohol if you do a mercy killing for me,” she offered Damian.

The boy looked amused but gave no indication that a deal was made.

“Your date that awful?” Jason teased as he smirked at Dick, who ignored him.

“Do you have the hearing of a dog? Fuckin’ Christ.”

The four of them stuck together for most of the night. Tim would touch base with them every so often. But he kept getting dragged away by board members or partners or anyone that wanted to kiss the ass of the future head of Wayne Enterprises.

Dick and Y/N were laughing at Jason about something when Dick’s face suddenly fell as he spotted something on the other side of the room.

“God damn it, Damian.” Dick hissed as he put his drink down on the nearest counter. He turned to Y/N. “I’ll be right back. Stay here.”

Y/N just nodded.

But then Jason seemed to spot the youngest brother as well.

“I should probably help him and do some damage control,” Jason sighed.

Y/N laughed and nodded for him to go ahead.

“Now you can see why I avoid these shit shows.”

She laughed but pushed him away, “Go help Dick.”

Now that Y/N was alone, her senses was hyper focused on the party around her.

As she reached for her drink, she noticed that her surrounding area had gone eerily quiet. And she felt far too many eyes on her. There were hushed whispers and even gasps.

“Would you care to dance?” A voice asked from behind her.

Y/N’s entire body tensed.

She turned to see Bruce waiting patiently for her response.

But the look on his face was that of a man she didn’t know.

Bruce had a charming glitter in his eyes and his smirk was arrogant.

Y/N looked around at their audience, then at the dance floor. She was desperately trying to remember the last time she danced with someone.

“Umm…I don’t really know how–” her words came out so slowly.

“How to dance?” Bruce offered.

Y/N nodded.

“You just need a good partner,” he reassured her as he held out a hand.

‘What a fucking line,’ Y/N thought as she tried not to roll her eyes. She half expected him to add a wink.

Bruce guided her to the center of the dance floor and then pulled her closer with his right hand while his left wrapped around her hand.

Y/N wasn’t expecting him to pull her so close, but their body’s were now pressed together.

Bruce moved his mouth to her ear. “Relax,” he murmured.

“It’s hard to relax when you’re using me to set up your new flavor of the week,” she criticized. “Everyone is watching us.”

Bruce may be used to such scrutiny, but Y/N had zero experience with it. And it was safe to say she hated it.

“They’re not looking at me. They’re looking at you,” Bruce corrected.

“A woman who’s not even me. It’s just the dress.”

“I’m happy you like it, seeing as I picked it out,” he commented smugly.

Y/N’s chest tightened at the revelation.

“I see the real you right now, and that’s who I asked to dance.”

Y/N wanted to make a run for it. She didn’t want Bruce with an audience. She just wanted him to herself and she wanted him as he really was.

But her brain shut down for just this song and she followed her heart.

If Y/N concentrated hard enough, she could ignore all the invasive gawking. If she closed her eyes, it was just her and Bruce. So, Y/N tucked her head into his shoulder and let Bruce glide them across the floor.

Somehow she felt that Bruce was allowing himself this as well.

One song was not enough for what they both needed and wanted.

But Y/N would take what she could.

Though what she did not expect was to finally pull away to see Bruce looking utterly heartbroken. As if pulling away from her was the hardest thing he’d ever have to do. And for the first time, Y/N legitimately considered that Bruce might want the same thing as she did.

He’ll just never act on his feelings.

If Y/N had blinked, she could’ve missed the moment of honesty and vulnerability Bruce had colored all across his face – bleeding from his eyes.

Because, the next moment, the character was back.

As the party clapped for the band, someone called Bruce’s name. And their locked stare was broken.

And just like that, Y/N was snapped back to reality as if someone threw a bucket of freezing water over her.

Now that Bruce had moved on, no one bothered to keep their voices down. And the upperclass women of Gotham made it loud and clear that they were not pleased with Y/N’s presence.

“Seems he’s found his next prey.”

“She looks half his age, of course he would go for her. Typical man.”

“She’ll eventually learn like we all did.”

“I still say he was the best lay I ever had.”

“Remember when we both slept with him in the same week?”

Now Y/N wasn’t just brought back to reality – she was put in her place.

Before she could even realize what was happening to stop it, her eyes were filled with tears. She had to get out of there.

“Excuse me,” Y/N whispered desperately and she tried to push her way through the crowd.

As soon as she made it outside, she let out a gasp. The fresh air helped, but it wasn’t enough.

There wasn’t any guests outside, but Y/N didn’t feel a safe enough distance from the party. The gardens and maze were in her peripheral and it took her all of two seconds to decide that would be her safe haven.

She hurried through the maze and prayed that no drunken couples had tried to also sneak away from prying eyes.

But when Y/N reached the center of the maze, she was alone.

A fountain sat in the middle and the sound of its moving water calmed Y/N down a bit. But even that couldn’t stop her tears from finally escaping.

Y/N sat on the edge of the fountain as she tried to get a hold of herself. She could only imagine what this was doing her makeup that she spent an hour doing.

‘What a waste,’ she thought.

Her escape was short lived.

Dick called her name repeatedly from a distance.

Y/N panicked at the idea of him catching her crying. She quickly tried to hide any evidence of tears and pull herself together.

Dick finally caught up and let out a sigh of relief from behind her.

“Y/N, you can’t run off like that,” he tried to tell her.

He opened his mouth to lecture her further, but when he finally made it around the fountain and was facing her, his concern shifted.

“What’s wrong? What happened?”

“Nothing,” Y/N struggled to speak without sounding nasally. “I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not. You were crying.”

“I’m fine,” she tried to laugh. “Seriously, Dick.”

But he wasn’t having any of it. He moved to sit next to her on the edge of the fountain. Without hesitating, he wrapped an around her shoulder and pulled her into him.

“Come here,” he muttered softly.

Why did it feel so natural for him to do that? Like he’d done it a million times before?

He rubbed her arms. “Jesus. You’re freezing.”

Then he was taking off his suit jacket and putting it over her shoulders. But he didn’t miss a beat, quickly bringing her back into his arms again.

“Wanna tell me what’s got you so upset?” Dick asked after a few minutes of silently comforting her.

“It’s stupid.”

“It’s not stupid to me if it made you cry.”

Y/N took in a shaky breath, feeling like she was on the cusp of crying again. “I’m just like the rest of them.”

Dick waited, feeling like she needed to say more before he spoke.

“They were whispering terrible things. But it was everything I already knew. I’m just another stupid girl that managed to convince herself that she was different.”

Dick was silent as he processed his words. It wasn’t hard for him to know Y/N was talking about Bruce, even thought she never uttered his name.

“I’ve got an idea,” Dick announced. “Let’s ditch this stupid gala. Get out of these clothes. Put on some sweatpants. And I’ll have Alfred order us as much pizza and wings as you want.”

Now Y/N wanted to cry for a completely different reason.

Dick was the sweetest man she’d ever met.

“Sound like a plan?” He asked her when she didn’t respond and instead just stared into his blue eyes.

Y/N nodded.

“We can even invite my good-for-nothing brothers if that’ll make you happy.”

Her first instinct was to say yes. They all amused her beyond belief. Watching the way they all interacted with each other was like watching a reality show. And it was always obvious how much they loved each other deep down – even with Damian, who would rather die than admit such a thing.

But if all of them were included, who knew when Bruce would eventually make an appearance. And Y/N just didn’t think she could be in a room with him again tonight.

“Just you and me,” she clarified.

That seemed to please Dick and he nodded.

“Just you and me,” he confirmed as he offered her a hand up.

When they started walking back to the manor, Dick wrapped an arm around her shoulder, keeping her close to his side.

“I’m going to ask you a question and I need you to be completely honest with me,” but she said it through a smile.

Dick looked a bit nervous, but nodded. “Alright.”

“Do you know how to order takeout on your own?”

Dick threw his head back and laughed. “How dare you!”

He pinched her waist, making her yelp. But he didn’t let her escape his hold. “Yes, I do. In fact, when I’m at my own place, I live off takeout. And let me tell you, no one can order food quite like I can. Thank you very much.”

Once they reached the second floor of the manor, the two of them parted ways to changed out of their fancy clothes.

Y/N washed her face, scrubbing the layers of makeup off. But before she could rid herself of the evidence, she noticed the smeared mascara and eyeliner.

Words could not describe the relief of putting on baggy sweatpants and a hoodie and fluffy socks after wearing a fitted gown and high heels.

30 minutes later, just as promised, Dick was bringing up a huge pizza and a box of wings to Y/N’s bedroom.

They ate on the floor. Dick managed to light the fireplace that was in there, because Y/N didn’t know what to do with the thing. The television was on, but neither of them were watching it. It was simply white noise.

Two hours later, Y/N was laughing so hard at a story Dick was telling her that she had tears in her eyes and her stomach hurt.

“I don’t believe you!”

“I’m not kidding. Ask Jason. He took my clothes and I was ass naked, running through the streets of Gotham. I wanted to kill him.”

Y/N grabbed another wing and got sauce all over her face.

“What?” She asked when Dick was watching her with adoration. “Do I have sauce on my face?”

He tried to hide his smile. “Nope.”

She knew he was lying and then purposely smeared more sauce around her lips. “How about now? Do I have anything now?”

“No. Nothing.”

“On a scale of 1 to 10, how attractive am I right now?” Y/N laughed as she wiped the sauce off her face with napkins.

“11,” Dick responded without hesitating.

The playfulness was sucked out of the room when they both heard how serious his tone was.

Y/N’s face went somber as she looked down at the floor. “I’m sorry I didn’t dance with you.” She laughed lightly, “I’m a lousy date, huh?”

“That’s not true,” he immediately shot down. “This is the most fun I’ve had…” His words died out when he realized he couldn’t even remember. “Well, it’s the most fun I’ve had in awhile.”

“Me too,” she replied with a quiet sweetness.

Through her full-body laughter, she had moved closer to Dick without realizing it.

He glanced at her lips. He just couldn’t help himself.

The thing about Dick wearing his heart on his sleeve was that it was nearly impossible for him to hide his feelings, his desires. It was all in those blue eyes of his, waiting to easily be read by someone.

And while Y/N looked at him looking at her, she felt beautiful. Because that was all Dick could possibly think as he stared at her.

Neither knew who leaned in first. Perhaps this was their dance that they weren’t able to have earlier.

But they made up for it by sharing an impassioned kiss now.

Dick’s lips were softer than Y/N expected. His hands gripped her waist possessively, making it very clear what he wanted – but still being ever so gentle and soft with his touches.

One of Dick’s hands moved from her waist up her back to tangle his fingers in her hair. He tugged on the strands and pulled her closer, deepening the kiss.

They both could slightly taste the pizza and wings on each other’s lips, but neither of them cared at all.

The kiss didn’t last long enough for either of their liking.

But Y/N pulled away anyways, gasping for air a bit.

“I’m sorry,” she sighed.

“You don’t have to be sorry,” he whispered through hooded eyes as he brushed some hair away from her face. “I’ve been wanting to do that for awhile,” he added with a smirk.

But Y/N wasn’t really sorry about the kiss.

She was sorry because she knew that things were far more complicated than ever.

-----------------------------------------------------

Part V

Happy Valentine’s Day!!!

Please, please, please write me a book report of what he thought of this chapter. It will be your VDay gift to me 😘

#all men have limits part 4 #bruce wayne x reader #bruce wayne reader insert #bruce wayne x reader x dick grayson #dick grayson x reader #dick grayson reader insert #batfam #dick grayson x reader x bruce wayne #batman x reader #nightwing x reader #batboys #bruce wayne #batman #dick grayson #nightwing

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papercupids · 3 years

Text

ruin us - ten lee

pairing -> ten lee x yandere!reader

warnings -> blood, mentions of a body, yandere behaviour by the reader, mentions of a knife, the reader kills someone, ten is held captive by the reader.

i do not, in anyway condone this behaviour,

genre -> yandere

word count -> 1.6k

a/n -> this was the result of a brainstorming between me and @go-shotaro,, her brain is just so awesome please. proofread by her as well :D.

Your hands fly to the cold handle of the beige drawer of your kitchen, the colour has grown dirtier, none of you had the time nor the energy to tend to it after a long day of work.

The dim light in the kitchen was enough to illuminate your actions but it failed to reach inside the drawer, as you slid your hands through it, touching the utensils to know which was which until you found the one you were looking for.

You look around again, your shabby apartment is intact. The sofa with a dust cover on it, making the black look like a cheap brown and smelling of the cigarettes you stub on it sometimes. There were half empty glasses on the center table, the water now unfit for drinking due to the paint brushes in them, the color departing from the brush and settling inside the glass.

Pages lay scattered with half made drawings there, you could vividly recognize your face on them, in different expressions and different costumes. But all you felt was a frown making its way on your face as you remember the disappointment on ten’s face.

You were his muse, always were and always will be; he assured you but something wasn’t right for now. He claimed to be in a creative rut.

You couldn’t mask the clear the drop in your self esteem then, his paintings was what brought you two together and you let the memory of him sitting there in a cafe, in a corner just beside the window where enough sunlight could luminate his work, and staring at you as you sat diagonal to him.

He approached you around 15 minutes later, softly asking if he could sketch you out, he was in a creative rut then aS WELL and a part of you was scared that even this time he’ll need a new muse to get him out of it.

You tighten your grip on the utensil in your hand, this wasn’t the time to think about this, you shook your head.

You came home to the door unlocked and the voices from inside, convinced someone had broke into your apartment. But it baffled you how of all the influential residential areas, they’d choose yours, there wasn’t a single thing of worth here.

Nevertheless, the knife in your hand was unwavering. And you took steps slowly and in a featherlight way.

There was a sane side of you that wanted to call ten and let him know about this but he’d be at work, probably working his ass out and, you glance at your watch, he was going to be home in about an hour already so there was no use in bothering him.

The door from where the voices had been coming from was the room ten had converted into his studio, with a huge easel in the corner of the room, a one seat replica of the sofa you had in your living room in the other corner.

His paints littered across the room on piles of newspaper that had been long destroyed.

The door is right in front of you and you can smell perfume in the air, way more expensive than the one bottle you had tucked away in the closet of your bathroom, and you push open the door, readying the knife.

And you let out a soft gasp.

Ten is at work, his brows furrowed, and sweat beads appearing on his skin, his concentration doesn’t faze even when the door you throw open lets out a screech. He’s still in his uniform and in any other instance you’d be complaining to him about how hard the paint is to get out of a cloth and how he should have atleast discarded the shirt before sitting down to paint, and to which he’d reply, “you don't think about these things when inspiration strikes,”

But to your horror, there's someone seated there.

And you swear that that’s when your world comes shaking down, piece by piece and you swear you can hear the cracks shattering.

There’s someone on the sofa, with a small face, a bob cut with bangs and doe eyes, you can swear she’s one of the prettiest people you’ve ever laid eyes on. Any other instance you’d swoon over her, but right now all you feel is the lump in your throat, making your hands shake and the anger that doesn’t let you drop the knife.

“Ten,” you say in a softer voice than you intend to, ten and the girl turn to you, interrupted.

Ten is pale as he looks at you, he’s unsure of what your reaction would be, he tries to be calm, but his eyes give it away.

“Babe,” his voice is honey, and it sounds like he’s capturing a wild animal that has escaped from a zoo, all you feel is the urge to stab the canvas that he’s painting on.

“Meet Lisa,” his tone is yet not changed, and Lisa offers you and looks at you with an awkward smile the same way, like a tilt of her head and you could go feral at any moment.

“What is she doing here,” it’s not a question, it’s a signal for her to pack her things and leave, and she can see it, watching her reflection in the steel.

“I- i- met her at work, i felt like i could paint her,” ten is scared, not for him, he knows how to deal with you but the fact that lisa is right beside you, your knife in the very hand she sits beside.

“You wanted her to be your muse,” you spit out, taking steps inside the room.

“If you could just put down the knife,” ten retaliates.

“You wanted her to be your muse,” you repeat, trying to grasp, was he going to replace you?

Was he going to throw an entire year of an intimate relationship for his godforsaken painting? Was he going to paint her in the same colours he did you?

It made you want to break his paintbrushes, was it more than your love?

He stands up from his stool, slowly, and walks towards you dodging the paint in his way.

“She’s not my muse, babe, that’s you, i just- you know i’ve been struggling with inspiration lately, she offered to help,” he circles around you and rubs his hand on your free arm.

“Put down the knife, babe,”

He calculates and there's a twitch in his eyebrows as he reaches your knife, and as he confirms you won’t do anything, he takes your hand around his waist and pulls you in close.

“She’s not gonna replace you, no one’s ever gonna replace you,” he whispers in your ear.

You take small and exhausted steps into the room, it almost felt like you’d faint from the lack of energy in you. You rubbed at your eyes; sore from all the crying, you hadn’t looked into a mirror, but you were sure if you did your face resembled a shell of your bright self.

You were so upset. Why did ten have to go ahead and do this?

And as you fumble for switches in the dark, the material is cold beneath your fingers, making you feel and numb at the same time. After a few clicking sounds, you finally turn on the right one.

And you’re greeted with a warm feeling, a feeling that makes you break down all over again, why did you love him that much? Why were you so weak for him?

He’s there; but he refuses to look at you, and as you inch closer to him you can see a look of fear and disgust mixed in his eyes.

“ten,” you whisper softly, afraid someone might hear you. You decide to try again for the sake of the amount of the love you had in you, that it literally ran in the blood of your veins.

“I know I’m not perfect, but I love you.”

Ten doesn’t look at you for a while, hoping you’d go away, but you sit on the floor with an urging look, wanting to make him understand your pure intentions.

He turns to you and flinches lightly, “What this is, what you’re doing and what you did, this isn’t love.”

You sigh, “how many times should i explain it to you, it was a mistake, ten. Mistakes happen.”

“Yeah, well, it might be a mistake, y/n. But she’s dead. You killed her.” and he finally dares to look at the side of the room he has been avoiding since last night.

And there’s a pool of blood right there, a knife adorning the body which laid lifelessly there.

The ends of your eyes are burning, tears threatening to fall again as you make an attempt to clear yourself again.

“She would have taken you away from me,” you whisper, hoping he’d get it, but it just causes him to snarl and struggle at the binds around his hands.

“What the fuck are you going on about? We were going just perfect before this. If you trusted me just a bit, you wouldn’t have done this.”

“I did it because I didn't wanna let her ruin us, baby.”

He flinches again at the nickname, a day ago, he’d have felt proud and happy that he’d finally found someone who loved him. But now it just felt bitter.

You throw your hands up in withdrawal, “fine, if you wanna keep being this way, then i’m not gonna stop you,”

“You can stay here and look at your friend until I've found a way to deal with her.” and you get up and turn away from the room, switching off the light.

“Have fun,” even in the dark, ten could see the smirk that painted your lips. He had no option but to give in.

networks - @prism-nw & @neoturtles

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danishmiilk · 3 years

Text

when thunder splits the sky - na jaemin

au || royalty!au, soulmates!au

genre || angst, fluff, slight crack

warnings || swearing, death mentioned, almost deathly sickness, a lot of stress on jaemin and y/n’s part, throwing up.

summary || soulmates. the source of happiness, the source of sickness. you’re shocked that your best friend (and the second prince) is your soulmate, but it shouldn’t be too bad. after all, you’re best friends, right? you know each other better than anyone else in the world. but when jaemin refuses to realise his love, shit hits the fan.

word count || ~10k

note || this is a collaboration piece with @astroboy-lele for @k-dinernet‘s dance off event!

you and jaemin were close, closer than a commoner and a prince should be. but since you were the main cook’s daughter, it wasn’t too uncommon to see the two of you running around with bright smiles lighting up your faces. then studies took over for jaemin. he was constantly studying to become a better king than his dad, which was slightly unfair since he wasn’t even the crown prince. but accidents could happen, so jaemin had to be prepared. so you were left to your own devices most of the time, fiddling with things in the kitchen, or helping clean the monstrous castle jaemin called home.

“jaem!” you giggled happily when jaemin emerged from the library’s study. he looked tired. more tired than a 17 year old should be. dark circles contrasted his pale skin, and your hand automatically came up to rub at his slim cheeks. “you should get more rest.” you chided him.

“can’t.” jaemin responded curtly, removing your hands from his face. “i need to study.”

"but you're always studying," you sighed. it shouldn't be this hard to spend time with your best friend, but you supposed it was one of the cons of befriending the second prince of your kingdom.

"you don't understand, y/n! how could you? it's my duty to my family and my country to keep studying in case, heaven forbid, anything happens to doyoung hyung!" he snapped sharply at you, and though you knew he was clearly overstretched and stressed beyond anything you'd ever seen him (or didn't see him, he was always in the library nowadays anyway), you still took a step back and flinched away, hurt. jaemin stepped forward, mouth trying to form apologies. you shook your head, eyes glassy.

“don’t.” your voice was softer than expected. “i’ll.. i’ll leave you to it.” you ran off before jaemin could even react, wiping at your eyes.

jaemin watched you go. he watched you leave, back retreating into the dark hallways. he felt bad, of course he did - jaemin would never snap at you for no good reason. the last time he actually wanted to hurt someone was when you came to him sobbing, one year ago. the memory was still fresh in jaemin’s mind.

you supposed it could be you being too sensitive, but it was the toll the absence of jaemin took on you. sure, absence made the heart grow fonder, but it also did make cracks emerge in a friendship. you couldn’t see your cracks yet, but they’d emerge soon enough - it was the first time in so long you’d managed to talk to jaemin, and he’d just brushed you away brusquely. your hand raised to your eyes to wipe away the stray tears that had fallen.

without looking where you were running, you’d bumped into something very solid. something very human. roughly, you placed your hands on said solid thing and pushed yourself away, speeding around the obstacle to the forest, tears still filling up your eyes. you didn’t blink them back - if you’d blinked, they were sure to have fallen out.

“y/n?” the very confused crown prince shouted out from somewhere behind you, “what’s going on?” and unbeknownst to you, his brother was soon to follow, brushing past him like he was invisible (last he checked, he wasn’t.) “jaemin?” the pair of you had left long before there was a chance to provide the prince with any of his requested answers, leaving a very confused doyoung standing in the middle of the hallway. sighing, doyoung brushed off his clothes. sometimes he didn’t know what he put up with you for.

once you set foot into the forest, immediate regret almost washed over you. it started raining. not gently either, it came down in harsh droplets, hammering into your clothes, thoroughly soaking you to the bone. you shivered, rubbing your hands up and down your arms, trying to bring warmth to yourself. it didn’t work, so you settled with standing under a tree in an attempt to stay out of the storm. you gazed up at the sky, wincing as thunder rumbled in the distance, reminding you of your fears. you wished with all your might that the storm would stop. it didn’t. of course it didn’t. why would it, it was nature, and nature didn’t listen to common people, only the gods above. “y/n? y/n! oh my god, y/n!” you heard a shout echo through the forest, and you shivered again. “there you are, do you know how long i’ve been looking for you?” jaemin accused, hands grabbing at your shoulders. you glared back, though it wasn’t threatening as you were shaking and shivering, teeth chattering. “you know it’s the rainy season and almost winter! what the fuck were you thinking?” jaemin huffed, but shrugged off his coat and draped it around your shoulders gently, concern making his eyebrows knit together.

“it was sunny before.” you protested, and jaemin exhaled, shaking his head with disappointment at your naive actions.

“you should know the weather changes quickly,” jaemin retorted, and that shut you up. you knew the weather changed fast, but emotions took over you, just wanting to escape the castle jaemin called home. “we should find some shelter. i know there’s an old cottage somewhere, i just don’t know where.” jaemin sighed.

you raised your eyebrows at him, “what, it wouldn’t be some strange warped hansel and gretel remix going on, would it? because we’re not smart enough to push witches into ovens.” jaemin smiled widely, chuckling at your small jab at yourself and him.

“no, it’s completely safe.” he assured you, grabbing your hand. jaemin nervously cleared his throat. “uh… i, i should apologize for earlier. it wasn’t right for me to snap at you.” you squeezed his hand gently.

“i know you’re stressed, it’s okay. i really should be more lenient.” you sighed, slightly disappointed in yourself for not understanding your best friend’s struggles. his hair was sticking to his forehead, yours similarly sticking you your arms and neck.

“it’s just the expectations, you know. of my parents, of the people… of the country.” jaemin’s eyes widened in horror and fear, an expression that would be almost comical under different circumstances and whispered, “what if i have to rule the country one day?”

your friend blanched and you sighed, tightening your hold around him to anchor him to reality, “look, i’m not saying you’re incapable of doing it, but it’s really quite impossible that something were to happen to doyoung, so i don’t think you really have to worry about that too much. still, being royalty is probably way harder than i could imagine.”

his voice wistful, jaemin’s eyes shined with tears - or perhaps it was just the rain creating illusions. “sometimes i wish i were never born into royalty. but you know what, there’s pros and cons to everything, that’s just how life is. we get privileges, but we can’t have the best of both worlds. still,” he looked down at the wet ground, “every time i see children running about or playing with their friends in courtyards or in the streets, it makes me wish i had a childhood. makes me wish i had friends, and was allowed to play with them, to live a normal life. normal. what a beautiful word, really, and how ironic that millions of people would give anything to be a member of the royal family, while the second prince would do anything to get out of being one.”

there wasn’t very much to say, you thought, considering jaemin very rarely went into long, emotional speeches like this one. you’d never be able to understand, and you weren’t about to try. softly, so very softly, you whispered, “but you have me.” jaemin smiled softly, and slightly proudly at you.

“yeah. yeah, i do.” and he did. he’s always had you, from the first day he sneaked into the kitchen for a taste of his birthday cake before he was supposed to, until- well, there isn’t an until if you’ll have his back forever, is there?

a cottage was beginning to come into view in the distance, a quaint little thing fit for no more than one person (or perhaps seven dwarves, no reference to snow white intended). the rain blurred your vision and wind whipped through your hair, but it was shelter, and so hand in hand, you ran towards it.

“to what honour do i owe the presence of the second prince at my humble abode?” a boy’s voice, sweet and melodic, came from behind you.

you jumped. “jaemin! i thought you said it was safe.” you hissed, clutching at jaemins arms. jaemin just shrugged. you sighed, keeping an eye on the strange boy. jaemin gripped your hand tighter, however.

jaemin gestured vaguely around, staring at the auburn-haired boy with no small amount of skepticism, “i thought you’d be… older. like, an old lady.”

the boy scoffed. “who’s to say i’m not? witches don’t always have to be middle aged ladies with no fashion sense and even less hair. i’m donghyuck, by the way. come on in.” jaemin was still looking the boy up and down in curiosity, finally blurting out, “witches use umbrellas?”

“no, we’re waterproof,” donghyuck deadpanned, sarcasm filling his words.

“jaemin,” you frowned, “do you know him?” a quick shake of his head confirmed your suspicions. “then why,” you half-screeched into his ear, “do you assume he’s safe?”

“i’m not. i could turn you into a frog, if you want.” the boy suggested, waving a hand, making you flinch and jaemin move your smaller frame behind him. donghyuck moved a shoulder evenly up and down, “joking.”

“that wasn’t funny!” you gasped. donghyuck moved his other shoulder up and down, doing a strange half-shrug again, “nobody gets my humour.”

you followed him into the house, dripping water all over his doormat and the wooden planks of his floor, but not daring to move any further than that. donghyuck waved his hand, slamming the wooden door shut behind you and lighting the fire, “will the two of you stop looking so shocked? it’s not like i’m going to cook you for dinner, so why are you acting like you’ve never seen a witch before?”

“because we haven’t,” the note of childlike curiosity reappeared in jaemin’s voice, and you were glad his mind was taken off of his royal duties, “they were outlawed a long time ago.” “right,” donghyuck levitated a couple mugs of cocoa over to you, “i forgot, sorry.”

“so your existence is basically illegal, and yet you’re serving the prince of your kingdom hot chocolate in the middle of the thunderstorm like nothing’s wrong?” you sputtered in disbelief, though you didn’t actually splutter, of course; that was rather an expression authors liked using. “all in a day’s work,” donghyuck glanced at you again, “come in and stop dripping water on the mat. would you believe it, magically drying the mat is harder than magically drying the wood.” very honestly, you didn’t know what to make of that boy.

you stood awkwardly, pressing yourself into jaemin’s side as you watched donghyuck bustle around his house, ironically not unlike an old lady. “so, ummm, could you show us some magic or something?”

“like drying our clothes,” jaemin added, motioning to the soaked fabric draped over his body.

“they’ll dry, just sit by the fireplace. in the meantime, i can show you a soulmate spell if you’d like to see it. it’s one of the easier and prettier spells, so i think you’d enjoy it, even if it’s highly unlikely it would work. soulmates are rare things, and even rarer are soulmates who discover each other and the fact that they are soulmates. so i’ll do it, but if you two don’t turn out to be soulmates, don’t be disappointed. if you do, there isn’t going to be a flash of golden light and a shower of sequins either, so don’t get your hopes up.”

“you’re saying like what would happen is one of us would die and suddenly come back to life.” you sarcastically commented, but eyes growing wide as the moon above when donghyuck looked around nervously.

“well…” he started, but you held up a hand.

“excuse me, what. come again?”

“let me just show you.” donghyuck sighed, and got up, grabbing a book from the large shelf pushed against the wall. he flipped through a few pages carefully, and let out a satisfied “ah,” when he found the correct page in the yellowing book. “the concept of soulmates hath been the strongest bond known to man since the beginnings of time. for the true blossoming of true love takes place when the eyes of soulmates transform into colours of the fall. time and time again, history older than anything thou or i could ever imagine hast proven that soulmates are rare, ones who know about them even more so. for thee, the pair who is reading this, thou art soulmates. it would be an insult to fate and everyone who cannot experience such a connection to not realise your feelings. thou hath one month to realize feelings or one half of the pair will be fated to a cruel ending. as mere mortals, we do not make the rules. nobody can help thee except the other, but fear not. you are soulmates. you have a bond. said bond shalt be enough, if thou realises it.” haechan read, rubbing the thin, old pages of the book between careful fingers. you glanced over at jaemin who was shifting his weight back and forth, not knowing where to put his feet. “so, basically,” donghyuck started, ignoring jaemin’s nervous state. “if your soulmate doesn’t acknowledge their feelings for you, or you don’t, one of you would basically die.” he shrugged. your mouth dropped open. how in the world was he so calm about it? “what the fuck? they could die?” jaemin seemed to share your sentiment.

“what is a fuck?” donghyuck furrowed his eyebrows together, evidently confused as to what this strange new word meant. jaemin faltered, taken aback, “wait, dude, you look like you’re, what, seventeen, and you have no idea what fuck means?” donghyuck looked at jaemin like he was an idiot, “never gotten the chance to interact with a lot of other seventeen year olds.” jaemin nodded solemnly, “can relate. only got this loser for a friend.” jaemin hooked a thumb in your direction. you rolled your eyes.

“let us begin the spell! i feel like i’m conducting a child gender reveal party,” he exclaimed happily, rubbing his hands together with glee. you held up your hand.

“hold the fuck up, you’re not performing this spell! one of us could DIE!” you exclaimed.

“there’s the word fuck again. kinda catchy.” donghyuck tested it out under his breath. “any other new words?” he asked. jaemin opened his mouth, no doubt to actually teach donghyuck how to swear, and well, you weren’t exactly opposed to letting him, but not dying came higher than teaching people you just met how to swear on your priority list.

“don’t worry. there’s only a slight chance that you’re soulmates anyway, and it’s better to know than to remain in oblivion. i’m not kidding.” “ignorance is bliss?” you suggested, desperate to stop donghyuck. “no, y/n. i think… if we indeed are soulmates, we deserve to know. i want to at least know why i died if i do suddenly die.”

“i have heard of that saying, y/n, was it? say, can fuck be used as a noun, a verb or an adjective?” “any way you want,” jaemin grinned, “reality can be anything you wish it to be!” “sweet,” donghyuck plonked a cauldron of unknown origin onto the table, “i like that word already.”

pulling a ladle out of seemingly nowhere, donghyuck pointed said ladle at you, “what’s your favourite flower?” you stared at him blankly, “you need that for the spell? i don’t really have a preference.” donghyuck rolled his eyes, “no, i was just curious. if you’re interested, your aura says daisy and jaemin’s absolutely screams carnations. for the record, i have zero idea what those flowers mean, but who cares?” he waved an arm over the cauldron which then proceeded to bubble, pushing dandelions and carnations to the surface. white. all white. “pretty enough, i suppose. i don’t usually give my services discounted, so you can just teach me some new words and it’s a deal.”

as you thought back, you did have a small memory of making flower crowns with jaemin. you often made daisy crowns, while jaemin’s were, as far as you knew, carnations. they were always given to you, all his carnation-based flower accessories: crowns, necklaces, bracelets.

you were jerked back to the present and away from distant memories as jaemin helpfully, or not so helpfully, instructed donghyuck on how to swear, “so, motherfucker is a noun. the verb equivalent is motherfucking, but that’s usually used as an adjective anyway. can also be shortened to mf. bitch is a more female-specific curse word since its original meaning was something along the lines of female dog.”

“i thought dogs were nice,” donghyuck pointed a finger aggressively at the bubbling liquid inside the cauldron, flowers obscuring most of its contents, “this always takes way too fucking long to boil so i can’t do anything. how perfectly bitchy of it.” jaemin’s face lit up with that mischievous smile you were so used to, “you’re a natural!” “why, thank you.” you had to be imagining things. either that, or your ears were waterlogged. shaking your head wildly, all you got was a headache, so no, your ears weren’t waterlogged. and so the two boys before you were complimenting each other casually on their ability to swear, even as one’s existence was against the law and the other was the prince of your kingdom. because that was not… strange. not strange at all.

“why don’t you teach him things like crap, hell and damn? why… fuck and bitch?” donghyuck had settled into an armchair by the fire, snapping his fingers every minute or so to keep the cauldron’s contents boiling, “you want to learn the interesting shit. like, you know, if i can learn shit and motherfucker then why am i learning crap and hell and damn? they sound lame compared to bitch, fuck and shit.” donghyuck shrugged, you sighed, and jaemin nodded like he’d birthed and raised donghyuck for seventeen years just for this moment.

“i mean, my parents don’t let me curse, but it’s fun to see them mad sometimes.” jaemin shrugged. you shook your head at the boy next to you (we shall omit the fact that he learnt half his curse words from you, and the other half from the legendary crown prince’s speech in which he accidentally swore half a dozen times in front of the whole nation. doyoung got grounded, but it made jaemin, and by extension you, developed a heck of a lot more respect for him.) you watched quietly as the two boys exchanged details about their lives and excitedly swore together. unconsciously, you started shivering again, your clothes still not quite dry. jaemin noticed, and picked up the blanket laid across his lap, wrapping it around your shoulders, making sure the blanket was secure around you before turning back to donghyuck. you learnt he also liked to be called haechan or hyuck, lived out here all his life, and didn’t know much about the kingdom from having to stay hidden from the world. jaemin’s expression held a hint of guilt, knowing that he was a member of the family that had caused huyck's plight.

“ooh! the spell is done!” hyuck clapped, and scrambled to his feet, once again doing the weird shrug thing, skipping over to the cauldron. his hair bounced and jaemin snickered while you quieted him. you shrank back into the couch as the sounds from the caldron became louder and donghyuck’s eyes started to sparkle. jaemin grabbed your hand, palms slightly sweaty. donghyuck peered into the large metal bowl, and smiled. his smile made you a bit uneasy.

“ready?” he asked the two of you, and jaemin nodded while you hesitated.

“yes.”

nothing happened for a moment and haechan waved his hands over the flower-filled water, mumbling some ancient words. you watched, eyes wide, as the water came out in a stream, winding around the circumference of the small cottage, and then around you and jaemin’s hands. you gasped, as the water was ice cold though it was boiling just moments ago. a daisy settled on jaemins wrist, wrapping around it tightly. a carnation wrapped around your finger, like it’s own special promise to you. jaemin frowned.

“is that supposed to mean something?” he asked, tugging at the flower. it didn’t move or tear. haechan eyes doubled in size as his eyes zeroed in on the flowers.

“you’re… you’re soulmates.”

jaemin stood there in shock, and shook his head. “no way. we’re best friends.” he protested. your heart was slightly crushed, as you liked him for a few months now. who wouldn’t? “we can’t be soulmates. no way.” he shook his head again, as if to clear away the water clogging his ears. you let go of jaemin’s hand. your heart was hammering, matching the raindrops that pelted to the ground.

“are.. are you sure?” you asked, voice wavering. haechan nodded. your hands were shaking now, and jaemin was ignoring you. “can i… may i lie down?” you asked, twirling a finger around your long strands of hair. donghyuck nodded, pointing you to what you assumed to be his room. as you slipped off, you heard jaemin and donghyuck whisper something together.

the next few days you didn’t see much of jaemin, only when he came out of the library to get food. even those days were rare, as he often ate in there, or brought his lunch in during the morning. and each day, jaemins face looked more and more pale. the flowers had vanished, though they left marks on where they rested just a week ago. you cast a glance down the empty hallway to the library, feet hesitating. you made up your mind, pushing open the large oak doors and… found jaemin passed out on the ground.

you gasped, rushing over and checking his temperature. it was abnormally normal, though he was sweating. you called a maid over, and soon you found yourself in the hospital wing. how were you going to break it to his parents that their younger son was sick because you two were soulmates. the thought itself was ridiculous.

“is jaemin okay?” well, fuck you, he’s obviously not. an undertone of worry was detected from the trained calmness of doyoung’s voice. the king and queen had yet to arrive, and doyoung stood behind you, hand resting on your shoulder in a slightly failed attempt to calm you. quick breaths left you, panic filling your mind and cluttering your lungs. the crown prince patted at your shoulder awkwardly, turning to leave as he couldn’t really do much. besides, it was fairly obvious the two of you needed to be alone.

as the day faded into night, jaemin was still, not moving as you watched him, hands grasping at your hair. this was all your fault. no, it was that bitch of a witch named donghyuck. he cast the spell. you wanted to blame jaemin for not accepting that you were soulmates, and now he was going to die because of it.

obviously, you hadn’t had a soulmate before. but you could sense it, you knew that no matter what jaemin had done, you wouldn’t be able to stay mad at him. to love so hard you’re falling, but you know you’re flying. you’re not there yet, definitely not. there was an inkling of the possibility of that happening, though. you barely blamed jaemin for everything (which was mostly his fault anyway), and staring at the pale complexion of the boy in front of you, you couldn’t bring yourself to stay angry. you slipped your hand into his (see? can’t help it. this was all because you were soulmates, and totally not because you just wanted to.), and as storybook-esque as it was, it felt so right. a maid brought you dinner, but you couldn’t bring yourself to scoop the rice and noodles into your mouth. your stomach was protesting, but you didn’t care, resting your head on your arm, you clutched jaemin’s hand tightly. tears pricked at your eyes, and this time, you didn’t stop them.

doyoung came by again in the morning and found you awake, dark blue and purple eyebags obnoxiously present. “have you been here the whole night?” you stretched, not letting go of jaemins limp hand, back aching from the uncomfortable position you were in for the whole night.

“is there a wrong answer?” you asked, yawning as you spoke. doyoung sighed, rubbing at his temples.

“he’ll survive, y/n. it’s just sickness. we have the best doctor-”

“it’s not just a sickness!” you snapped, fire igniting in your stomach, the need to protect haechan slowly shrinking. you found yourself telling the oldest prince everything from getting caught in the rain, jaemin having a breakdown, the walk in the woods, to finding the cottage, and even the witch you encountered, though his existence was very much illegal. doyoung listened. he listened to every word, and nodded along, though his eyes were slowly going from panicked to angry.

“so, you found a witch, donghyuck, was it?” you nodded in confirmation, death gripping jaemin’'s hand. if he ever woke up he would for sure scold you for making his dominant hand ache. “he cast a soulmate spell, and jaemin didn’t accept. so now the gods are punishing him?” you nodded again. doyoung sighed, rubbing at his temples again. you watched anxiously, worried for donghyuck’s safety.

“could you get donghyuck to come here?” doyoung asked. that is not what you were expecting. blinking nervously, you nodded. you remembered the path jaemin took, right? if not, you could just shout.

“do you promise not to kill him? or like, arrest him? he’s an annoying motherfucker, but i think jaemin would be sad if you did,” you inhaled. doyoung nodded with a perfectly straight face. “he could turn you into a frog.” you added, deciding to trust him. doyoung looked a bit shocked, but you reluctantly stood up. “i’ll be back.” you whispered to jaemin, leaving doyoung to look after his brother.

setting off in the woods alone was scarier than you thought. shivering, you really wished you had jaemin in that moment. really wished. the sooner you got to donghyuck, the sooner he would be better, right? wrong.

“what do you mean you can’t remove the spell?” you shrieked, panic filling you once again. donghyuck looked sorrowful, and doyoung was standing with his arms crossed off in the corner.

“i can’t, i’m sorry, y/n. jaemin has to realize he loves you for the sickness to go away. and either way, all my spell did was prove that the two of you were soulmates. the sickness stems from the heavens”

“i have to what?” jaemin’s voice cracked slightly from not using it for the past few days. “jaemin!” you practically sobbed, hand clenching around his fingers from where you’d reached for them unknowingly. he squeezed back weakly, coughing. “what do i have to do?”

“realize you love y/n.” haechan said simply.

“i don’t think it works like that!” your voice came out slightly higher than usual, laughing nervously to stop jaemin from feeling uncomfortable. he had to, love didn’t work as such. you just didn’t decide to go, ‘okay today i have decided i love y/n!’ jaemin looked at donghyuck with visible confusion. all haechan offered was a half shrug in return.

“what happens if i don’t?” jaemin whispered. haechan glanced at doyoung, nervous that someone so high and regal was standing in the same room as him - jaemin didn’t count, seeing as he’d spent the first hour of knowing hyuck teaching him to swear, and he wasn’t the crown prince anyway - if he did or said the wrong thing, he would definitely get executed.

“we’ll get there when we get there. how long does he have?” doyoung asked. you gripped jaemin’s hand tighter, nervous of the answer. “it… depends?” donghyuck offered. doyoung scowled. “very helpful.” “i’m sorry, i’ve never had to deal with this kind of fuckery before,” donghyuck waved his hands around, “okay, swear i’m not doing magic, but i really didn’t cause any of this. okay. maybe a bit. but it would have happened anyways.” your eyebrow lifted.

“what do you mean, anyways?” jaemin asked, frowning.

“the soulmate spell only helps the soulmates find each other. and gets the show on quicker, but a year from now, the same thing would’ve happened.” haechan explained, still waving a hand. doyoung’s eyebrows knitted together. “so, jaemin and y/n should spend as much time together as they can.” hyuck concluded.

“and die faster?” jaemin snarled. haechan shook his head quickly, eyes straying to the other royal member in the room.

“no, if you spend more time together, then it’ll slow down until you realise you’re in love. usually, you get only a week, but if you spend every day together, it’s up to… a month?” haechan shrugged, letting the slightest hint of resentment slip into his voice, “maybe i’d know better if i actually could come out of hiding to be taught by more experienced witches. my work here seems to be done anyway, adios!” it was like donghyuck was born to be a showman. he ripped the curtains off and disappeared under them with a flash, letting the rich fabric settle slowly to the ground. doyoung sighed.

“well, you guys heard what he said. spend as much time together as you can.” doyoung shrugged. “and jaemin, try not to die.” doyoung added, a small smile playing at his lips, like he knew something you didn’t. jaemin nodded, head thrown back onto the plush pillows. you frowned, jaemin usually loved to hang out with you. something definitely changed over the last few weeks.

try not to die, he said. well, you were definitely dying inside. and jaemin wasn’t getting any better, coughing, occasional throwing up, and sneezing. he barely could keep his food down, let alone sit up without any help. it worried you. it worried you a lot more than you let on. to say things were awkward was putting it lightly. everyone avoided the two of you, seeing the tension held over your and jaemin’s heads. you started to get fed up after a few days.

“what happened? aren’t you supposed to be with jaemin?” doyoung asked as you stormed downstairs.

“he’s not talking to me. what’s the harm in taking a small break?” you exhaled, running a hand through your now messy hair. doyoung frowned, the worry lines creasing his forehead. “don’t worry, i’m going back to the ward in half an hour. it’s just so… infuriating.” you ranted to the crown prince, resting your head on the stairwell railing. doyoung had stopped you half way down the stairs. “we’re soulmates for god's sake! can’t he just… talk to me? when did he start to see me as a bother? when did he… start to hate me? it’s like we never were friends. i miss him, doyoung. i miss my best friend. i miss his smile, his laugh, his weird antics, i miss my jaemin.” you whimpered, tears pricking your eyes for the third time today. jaemin being sick and ignoring you while, quite literally, on his deathbed did not help. especially since you two were soulmates.

“when did you start to fall in love with him?” doyoung questioned softly. you thought for a moment. when did you truely start to love jaemin? not in the rain. not when you had your first fight when you saw him. no, it started a while ago. when jaemin started to grow up. when you stopped making flower jewelry and when he started to give you real gems. when? you weren’t exactly sure. maybe you always loved him. maybe he always loved you. but when would he figure that out? doyoung just nodded, understanding your confused gaze, unfocused and misty-eyed. he stood up, brushing his black slacks and deep red shirt. “give him a bit. jaemin is a bit slow with these kinds of things.” you only nodded in response, mindlessly walking back to the ward jaemin was residing in.

jaemin still was not getting any better the next few days. he still refused to talk to you, only nodding or rolling his eyes as a response to you trying to start to converse. you were starting to lose hope.

you were surprised to see him lying on the cold tiled ground.

“jaemin, why are you on the ground? you should be in bed. it’s cold out.” you scolded, moving towards him. jaemin held up a hand, draping his hands over his stomach.

“the floor is nice and cold,” he uttered, sighing with relief as the tile cooled his sweaty body down. you frowned, huffing. jaemin, once again, did not listen.

“the ground is dirty. i can turn down the heat-” jaemin cut you off.

“shut up! i’m dying, i don’t care if the ground is dirty!” jaemin hissed, and you backed up, saddened by his tone. jaemin didn’t notice, too busy coughing into his elbow to notice your state.

“you’re not going to die,” you whispered, and jaemin moved his elbow away. “you’re not. i refuse to let you. i don’t care if you don’t love me right now, but you’re my soulmate, jaemin. soulmate. do you know how many people wish to have soulmates? jaemin, i’ve been by your side since we were in diapers. we played in the mud together. we got in trouble together. we did everything together, jaemin. i watched you grow up. i watched you become more responsible. i watched, and i waited for you to confess. but you never did, so now you’re sick, and it’s all your fault. don’t push the blame on me, on donghyuck, or on anyone. this is on you. if you want to sit here and wallow in your self-pity, go ahead. i’m tired, jaemin. i tried to give you time, but you only have three weeks left. i don’t…” you choked on your words. “i don’t know what i’ll do if you ever die suddenly.” you whispered, backing out of the door. jaemin struggled to his feet, but you were already gone, ends of your hair and dress flowing behind you.

he stared at the empty spot where you’d been just moments before, feeling the same emptiness in his heart. bitterness welled up from within him. he wasn’t that dumb either, but love just didn’t work that way. just because some spell told you that you were soulmates didn’t necessarily mean that with a magical click of your fingers you’d stare into each others eyes and sappily declare your everlasting love.

doyoung stepped out from nowhere, looking around with a confused expression, “where’s y/n? i swear i saw her here just a few minutes ago.”

“hey, hyung.” doyoung hummed in response. jaemin sat up with some difficulty, holding a hand up to stop doyoung from trying to help him, “what if this sickness has got nothing to do with the soulmate fuckery? what if i just, uh, have the plague or something?”

“have the plague or something,” doyoung drawled sarcastically, “the last time the plague was going around was, like, a hundred years ago.” jaemin winced.

“or maybe i have cancer.”

“or maybe,” doyoung narrowed his eyes at his brother, “you’re just being a fatheaded dick who can’t come to terms with the fact that you’re soulmates with your best friend, and have to realise your love for each other so you don’t suddenly stop breathing!” doyoung stalked out of the room without a single word, pausing to seemingly contemplate whether slamming the (very heavy) oak door would help prove his point. he very intelligently settled on just stamping his foot. it made him look like a child, but jaemin hadn’t seen doyoung this upset in a while. and frankly, it got him thinking a bit.

you walked into the hospital wing as usual without greeting jaemin. it wasn’t like you got a reply anyway. “hey,” the prince offered as you took up your usual spot by his bed with a book, a clear indication that you didn’t want conversation.

your eyebrows twitched a little. granted, you weren’t expecting him to say anything, but it must be a testament to your friendship if your little blow up had at least gotten jaemin to think a little. you stared pointedly down at the book you didn’t even know the title of.

“y/n.” still no response. “you’re holding the book upside down,” jaemin sighed.

furious with yourself, you flipped the book the right side up again, “you don’t want to talk to me. stop forcing yourself to.”

“i do want to talk to you, okay? i don’t particularly want to die either, the soulmates idea is just hard to stomach.”

“what, does loving me sound so bad? am i so unlovable?” you slammed your book closed, trying not to choke on the shower of dust that came with it. logically, you shouldn’t be getting mad. jaemin was just trying to make things better, but he sounded so forced. “you sound so forced to do this, jaemin.”

“oh, are you getting mad at me now? you were sad because i wasn’t talking to you, and now you’re mad because i am! what the fuck am i supposed to do?” jaemin glared at you from underneath the covers, “i’m trying, okay? i thought you said you didn’t want me to die!”

“i don’t want you to die!” you hissed back at him, tears springing to your eyes again.

“are you crying again? if every time we talk you get that sad, then maybe you should just let me die!”

you dusted yourself off and ran out of the room, not even bothering to give jaemin an answer. why didn’t he get it? it’s not that hard to understand! (when else but) on your way out, you bumped into (who else but) doyoung, crying (what else but) angry tears. again. you really had to stop doing that.

to nobody in particular, doyoung whispered, “why are they so angsty?”

“we need to talk,” doyoung declared the moment he walked into the room in one of the pockets of time that you weren’t in it. jaemin looked up from the extremely interesting loose thread on his blanket and nodded, “what about?”

“y/n.”

jaemin’s expression darkened in a nanosecond. “no,” he practically growled, “not her again. i can figure this out myself, doyoung hyung! you don’t have to help me.”

“if you can figure this out yourself, the two of you wouldn’t be the embodiment of every sad angsty book ever written.”

“it’s our way of coping with things.” the words sounded fake even to jaemin’s own ears.

“no,” doyoung deadpanned, “don’t fuck around with me.” he hissed, “you know she cries every time you give her unwanted insults. let’s count how many times i ran into her, sometimes quite literally, in the hallway with her crying. one, the day you two got lost in the woods. two, when you were passed out and unresponsive, three, a few days after you woke up and weren’t talking to her, four, literally yesterday after you basically told her she was unlovable.” doyoung held up his fingers mockingly and it felt like jaemin had just been slapped in the face. “four times, na jaemin. four times you fucked up, four times y/n felt worthless, four times more than needed. four times. thats more than anything that happened in the last 16 years of your friendship. four times in less than a month. get your shit together, jaemin.” doyoung snapped, and spun around on his heel. jaemin felt like everyone was against him at this point.

a week passes and hey, what did you know? some improvement was showing. you and jaemin could hold, an (albeit very awkward, but still) a conversation. it was a relief to you, but you were slightly suspicious of him. jaemin still couldn’t look you in the eyes, glancing away or inspecting his nails. but you couldn’t ask anymore of him, he went from straight out ignoring you, to asking how your day went. jaemin sent you a small smile, fiddling in his seat.

“how… how are you?” jaemin asked, glancing at your features shyly. you smiled, though it felt more forced than genuine.

“i’m good. have you been getting better?”

“well, you know. not really,” jaemin shrugged, not looking at you, “it hasn’t been getting worse either, though.”

you ignored the way jaemin was pointedly avoiding your gaze and offered a half smile you didn't really mean, “the weather isn’t very good today, is it?” the weather hadn’t been really good for the past week or so. even if you weren’t spending every waking (and sleeping) moment by jaemin’s side, you wouldn’t have been able to go out of the castle. the relentless rain pouring down on the windows made sure of that.

“y/n, i still think we have to talk.” jaemin’s expression turned serious, “i know i’ve been a dick these few weeks, and i’m not even going to try excusing myself for that. but i want you to know that no matter what, i still treasure you a lot as my best friend. i think i just need time - okay, admittedly we haven’t got very much of that left, about a week and a half or so, but i struggle with feelings. i really struggle a lot and it’s overwhelming and i miss you so much, i miss talking to you not-awkwardly and i want our old relationship back.”

you promised yourself you weren’t going to cry again, because god knows you’ve cried too much. “okay then,” you laughed lightly, “if you’re going to make this a deep sentimental talk, just know that i’m willing to wait for you for as long as you need. sadly this isn’t up to me.”

jaemin remained silent for a bit, taking in what you just said. when he spoke again, you were shocked. “do you think i love you?”

you cocked your head, “what i think doesn’t matter. the question is what do you think?”

“i want to know what you think.”

knowing he wasn’t going to let you go until you told him so, you sighed, “i think you do.”

“platonically or romantically?”

“my father wants my help in the kitchens, your highness. i’ll see you later.”

it was raining again, and you didn’t show up in his room like normal. jaemin was worried, and he got out of his bed clumsily, grabbing a cane, which he winced at. he looked like an old man with it. drawing back the heavy velvet curtains, the glass of his widow was covered in water droplets, all racing to the window sill. jaemin spotted you running around the courtyard, mouth open with a muted laugh and eyes sparkling even though you were soaked to the skin. jaemin found himself smiling, watching you with fond eyes. his senses kicked in, and he realized. he was truly, and utterly, with every fiber of his being, every cell in his body, in love with you. with his best friend. with the person who stuck by him all these years. who loved all his flaws and imperfections. he, na jaemin, second prince in line, never to sit on the throne (he didn’t mind that part), was in love with you. a cook's daughter, a commoner, but most importantly, his soulmate.

when you came inside, your teeth were chattering and you were shivering all over, but it was the happiest you’d felt in a while. nothing was better than dancing in the rain, really, except dancing in the rain with jaemin. that now… that was a hundred times better, but na jaemin was sick, so you’d have to forgo that. practically waltzing into jaemin’s room, you grinned at him, your good mood making you forget all the awkwardness. he was just your best friend, your best friend of so many years. awkwardness who?

“jaems!” it might have been the prior realization of love making jaemin completely disregard any tension that might have been between the two of you earlier, but he grinned back at you just as happily as you’d greeted him, “y/n!” he frowned, pretending he hadn’t been watching you from his window just a few minutes prior because that was borderline creepy, “why are you all wet?”

“i danced in the rain. oh god, jaemin, do you remember that time when we were dancing together in the rain and then decided to use a banana leaf as an umbrella but we got wet anyway? and then-”

“and then,” jaemin picked up seamlessly from where you left off, the grin not disappearing, “doyoung hyung came to check on us because he was scared we’d catch colds from running around in the rain all day. then we slipped and fell into the mud, splashing him all over.”

you laughed, a light tinkling sound that reminded jaemin again of why he loved you, “i swear the mud mask made his skin better.”

jaemin practically screeched with laughter, “you mean you’ve been looking at my brother’s skin?”

the overwhelming love and affection you felt for your best friend in that moment, both platonically and romantically, made you throw your arms around him, instantly soaking him through with your wet clothes. somehow, the two of you ended up sprawled on his bed.

“you know what? i love you.” jaemin sighed, snuggling into your embrace. your ears burned red.

“you.. you what?” you asked timidly. you really hoped jaemin said what you thought he said. jaemin smiled, leaning back more, adjusting the position the two of you were in. you now were snuggled into his chest, sighing as you felt your eyelids droop. jaemin chuckled lowly, and pressed a kiss to your forehead.

“i’ll be here when you wake up.” he whispered softly. you fell asleep, mind calm for once.

“jaemin- okay, you can explain why y/n’s soaking your bedsheets through and the both of you are completely drenched in rainwater first,” doyoung arched an eyebrow, “have y’all finally gotten your shit together?”

“i think i love her, hyung,” jaemin’s arm curled protectively around you, “really.”

doyoung clicked his tongue, shaking his head in disapproval, “you think? be sure of it, jaems. i’ve practically raised the two of you and watched you grow up, and now you say you only think you love her?”

“i love her.” jaemin struggled to hold back the laugh that was threatening to spill out of his chest. “i love her!” he repeated again, louder this time. seeing the finger doyoung had to his lips, he quietened down to prevent waking you up, “thank you, hyung. for knocking some sense into me.”

doyoung smiled, “anytime. it’s my job, after all. now, i think you two need some alone time. see you at dinner, i truly doubt you’ll still be sick.”

you were awakened by the sound of the door closing. rubbing your eyes tiredly, you looked around, disoriented, “did someone come in?”

“it’s nothing, y/n. just a servant. sleep, i love you.”

you yawned, “i love you too.” and you snuggled back under the covers with him, acting like it was the most natural thing to do in the world.

“hey,” jaemin whispered in your ear, waking you up gently, “i hate to have to wake you up, but dinner’s in a few. my parents want to see you too, apparently.”

you blinked the sleep away from your eyes, looking at his smiling face. waking up to jaemin’s smile was something you could get used to, you thought. “what?”

“i said, we have to go get ready for dinner. you too, yes, main banquet hall, my parents want to see you.”

your mouth dropped open, all thoughts of sleep gone, “i don’t have clothes suitable for a fancy dinner!”

“oh yes you do. wear that yellow dress with the sunflowers.”

“is that formal enough?”

“y/n, like, you’ve literally talked to my parents so many times. they watched you grow up. they’re not so different from doyoung and i.”

“but this is the first time meeting them as your girlfriend!” oh god, did you really just say that? you cringed inwardly. you hadn’t even put a label on the relationship yet. rushing to make amends, you stuttered out, “soulmate. i mean soulmate.”

“you’ve always been my soulmate. as for girlfriend, well, you can be if you want to, but we have explaining to do. now move! the entire bed is wet!”

with strength a sick person shouldn’t possess, jaemin threw you out of his bed playfully. you looked up in shock and happiness, “you’re well again! you’re not sick anymore!”

jaemin grinned down at you from his bed, “we realised our love. see you in twenty, adios, au revoir, zaijian, sayonara!” yelling at the top of his lungs, he pushed you out of his room and slammed the door, and you honestly couldn’t care less. you were flying (figuratively, of course), drunk on the sentiments of finally realising your feelings for your best friend and soulmate.

growing up in the castle had taught you some things about manners, especially when the queen insisted you attend some etiquette lessons together with jaemin (to keep him in check, she’d said). dropping into a deep curtsey in front of the royal family, you rose again when the king placed a warm hand on your shoulder, “get up, y/n. we’re all family here, there’s not need for such formalities. you never really did those before either.”

“i was eight and didn’t know much about manners,” you protested lightly as he steered you into your seat beside jaemin, then taking his own at the head of the table - the king’s seat.

you ate in silence and as fast as you could without being rude. nobody made a move to break the silence, so you sat and waited until the last of the plates had been cleared away by the servants, then leaned forward, “if it isn’t rude to ask, may i know why i’ve suddenly been called here for dinner?”

the queen smiled kindly at you, “of course not, dear. well, today we have two announcements to make, one of which concerns you.” she glanced at the king, who inclined his head at her with a smile as if to say “the floor is all yours, dear.” the queen turned back to you, and seeing the dying rays of last light hit her face, you were again reminded of how beautiful the queen was. “firstly, about doyoung. now, we all know that my dear son here is turning twenty one in a month’s time and has finished his education. and so, doyoung, my son, your father has decided to pass on the kingdom to you. the announcement to the people will happen in a few days’ time, if you agree, and the coronation shall be held on your birthday. you are a much beloved crown prince, and i am sure the news of your coronation will delight the kingdom. i do hope you accept. so,” she practically glowed with pride, staring at the shell-shocked prince, “do you?”

“it would be an honor, mother. but didn’t father say he enjoyed being king?” doyoung, the rightful heir to the throne and the one who’d been trained for this his entire life, looked shocked, to say the least. you couldn’t blame him; it must’ve felt like the weight of the world was on his shoulders.

“your mother and i have long been dreaming of a proper honeymoon in the carribean. away from the eyes of the public,” his father’s voice boomed encouragingly.

“then yes, i accept,” doyoung’s eyes were shining with tears and you really hoped he wasn’t about to cry. knowing him, once he started crying, he wouldn’t stop and that would really… kill the mood.

“cheers to king doyoung,” jaemin raised his glass of juice (seventeen is not of a legal age to consume alcohol) to the sky, looking elated for his brother, “and for heaven’s sake, king doyoung, don’t cry!”

doyoung sniffled a little, holding his own goblet of wine to his brother’s, “i won’t cry! thank you so much!”

“congratulations,” you grinned at doyoung, who’d been just as much your elder brother all these years as he’d been jaemin’s. just in the past month, he’d slapped the two of you so hard to get your shit together, and he should honestly be crowned fairy godmother of the year. except that he wasn’t old, didn’t have white hair pulled up into a bun, and (sadly) didn’t own wings.

“now for our second announcement. doyoung’s explained everything to us already, i hope you don’t mind.” doyoung grinned guiltily at you over the table - honestly! like he’d done anything wrong! “you’re obviously too young for marriage, but y/n, your parents, whom i’ve just talked to, and us - we give you all our blessings. let this relationship prosper!”

jaemin squeezed your hand in his assuringly with a victorious smile like he’d known all along that this would’ve happened. you choked back a sob of your own, “thank you! thank you so much.”

“we’ve never known that soulmates existed, but now that we do know, there isn’t a truer pair than you and y/n,” she addressed jaemin, “treat her well.”

“i swear, mother, you love her more than you love me,” jaemin half-groaned, ignoring his mother’s angelic smile and reply (“i do not! i merely prefer to be around her.”)

“to the new king and couple!” jaemin’s father raised his goblet for another cheer, and you downed your drink in one gulp. tilting your head to grin at jaemin, you thought there really couldn’t be any happier moment in the world.

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