#bit of a shorter chapter this week but hopefully will have more finished soon!!

[maximotts]

𝙻𝚎𝚜𝚜𝚘𝚗 𝚃𝚑𝚛𝚎𝚎: 𝙾𝚋𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚟𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜 & 𝙵𝚞𝚛𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚁𝚎𝚜𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚌𝚑

a/n: yes this is a day late, I've had a week from hell and I'm not having a holly jolly holiday season. Hopefully this really long chapter makes up for it! Reminder that we've got a scheduled break for this series for two weeks ask I do holiday things (derogatory) and finish up my Christmas fic

✎— priest’s daughter!Wanda x college student!reader ✎— confessions AU; after Wanda gets some much needed help from a few friends, she prepares for her first date.. at Carol's house party. Ups and downs ensue, but you try your best not to ruin the rare night out ✎— warnings: this is an 18+ series, minors DNI; light sexual content with some?? angsty scenarios? more like tense situations; drinking; talks of sex toys; intimidation, but R comes to the rescue; more shameless groping; first kisses; brief make outs; hard conversations and Soft Tummy Wanda Time

✎— words: 7.5k

series masterlist. || main masterlist.

“I can’t embarrass her, I don’t know what I was thinking… see you Saturday! What an idiot!” Wanda had been laid out on Natasha and Agatha’s couch between the two women for the past half hour, angsting over the earlier exchange through tears she thought she’d finished shedding back in high school. “I’ll stay home, there’s no way I should go.”

Natasha spoke up first, having been the one to open the door to find her best friend’s twin sister fidgeting in the hallway. As soon as Nat opened her mouth, Wanda was crying, falling into the slightly shorter woman with all her weight. She brought her inside quickly, hauled her to the couch while Agatha made her tea; she hadn’t seen Wanda this distraught in years so whatever happened, Nat knew it had to have been bad. 

Her first instinct was to ask who did what and give them a piece of her mind, but Wanda never let her, always insisting that reactions just made everything worse. “There’s no way you aren’t going. You have to after all of that, or you’ll look cowardly.” 

“But Tasha!” Wanda shot up to her knees, all watery eyes and red-tipped nose, nearly hitting the redhead in the face, “No one wants me there! And Carol was right.. I can’t dress like this.”

She’d never given much thought to what she wore; her dad didn’t let her wear anything too revealing growing up and when none of her mall trips were with friends instead of him, Wanda’s closet wasn’t exactly filled with each year’s trendy clothes. In college, she stayed with the familiar and dressed comfortably— now she feared you’d just been polite every time you paid her a compliment. 

“There’s one person that wants you there!” Agatha chimed in, righting Wanda’s skirt where it’d twisted around in her distress. She’d been assigned Natasha’s roommate in their first year of college; in their second, they’d moved into an apartment together off campus and when Wanda took up residence down the hall for their third, Natasha warned her that Wanda had been heavily sheltered and sometimes needed that extra bit of attention and care. 

Honestly, Agatha thought her friend was exaggerating, having met Pietro once or twice and not sensing anything off, but Wanda was a special case. Still, the younger girl was one of the kindest people she’d ever met and she enjoyed whenever she popped over for a chat. “And anyways, I think you look adorable.”

She was trying to help, but instead she only proved Carol’s point. Wanda groaned and fell back once more, head buried in the cushions, “I’m twenty years old, adorable isn’t going to cut it.”

The two older girls shared a look, Natasha’s worried while Agatha’s turned mischievous. Nat knew that look from the beginning of Agatha’s schemes and protectiveness kicked in anew. “Agatha.. I don’t think I like that look.” 

She brushed her friend off with a scoff, prodding at Wanda’s ragdoll state until she could wrench her upright once more. Unlike Natasha, she hadn’t grown up with them all, but from the day she met Wanda, Agatha saw a project. Now that she finally had an in, she wouldn’t pass it up. Especially not when it was for a good cause, “You wanna be hot, is that it? You want your new crush to see you and not be able to keep her hands off you?”

That shook Wanda to attention, cheeks beet red. Sure she didn’t want to be mocked or subject you to any torment just being seen with her, but she couldn’t imagine you wanting all of.. that from her of all people. She’d be lying if she said she hadn’t thought of it, but whenever she did, she tried her hardest to shake that seemingly impossible reality away, “No, I-”

“So when you show up to that party dressed like you belong there, it’s because you want to hold her hand?” Natasha laughed, pinching Wanda on the cheek because she knew how much she hated it. Maybe Agatha was right; a little push might be good for Wanda, at least to give her a chance to try. “Have her push you on the swings?”

This was not the conversation Wanda wanted to have today, not when she couldn’t even take the first step to kiss you. Needing to keep her mind from that spiraling train of thought, she spun around to face Natasha now, pouting hard, “I’m not a baby, be real!” 

Agatha tugged at Wanda’s dress gently, pulling at the material and letting the skirt fall back to her thighs. “Admit you want to stop looking like the poster child for an abstinence pamphlet and start dressing for a strip club and we’ll help you.”

“That is not what I want.” Reminders of some of the outfits she’d seen her peers wear flashed in her head with red alarm sirens; they’d be sure to catch your eye, seen you on Instagram with similar girls dancing and laughing without a care in the world. Beautiful as they were, that just wasn’t her. Wanda couldn’t turn into a new person overnight, nor did she want to. If she got new clothes, they had to be things she actually wanted to wear. Things you’d like on her. “I want her not to be embarrassed to be seen with me. I want her to kiss me, to flirt with me even though I wouldn’t have the faintest idea what I’m doing! I want her to like me.”

Agatha backed off, sighing and taking one of Wanda’s shaking hands in her own. “I’d bet money she already likes you; you’re lovely and it sounds like you two already spend so much time together.” Neither her nor Natasha wanted Wanda to be so down on herself; there was no need to be, considering how, from the picture Wanda painted, you were plenty into her. Telling her outright might scare her though; it was always baby steps with the poor dear. “All you need to do is show her you’re interested and a little wardrobe change never hurt anyone. If you hate it, you still have your old clothes, no harm done.”

Wanda nodded, staring down at her lap until Natasha grabbed her chin and forced her to look up. “Come on, cheer up, you won’t have that much work to do. You’re beautiful already,” Nat cupped Wanda’s cheek, booped her nose before pushing her dress down to reveal bare shoulders. “And I’ve seen you in a bathing suit, you’ve got legs for days and gorgeous tits-”

“Hey!” Wanda jumped as Natasha gave them a squeeze, instantly self-conscious. There was a night a few days ago, one of your lazy nights when you laid your head in her lap while she read an article off her tablet for extra credit, where you did the same thing. Softer than her friend just now, a singular slow touch. 

She looked down, naively thinking a stray hair on her shirt was the cause, but when she asked you only grinned and reasoned they looked too soft not to touch and went back to watching your show. Wanda decided to keep how tingly the action made her feel away from her two friends for now; they’d never let her live it down. “Just help me pick what to wear on Saturday.”  

As soon as Wanda conceded, Agatha was up and searching for her laptop, “Oh, we can do so much more than one night’s something!”

♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡ ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡

The days leading up to the party were filled with Wanda reassuring not only herself, but also you that she was perfectly fine to go. It was sweet how you worried about her, checking in at least once a day to make sure she knew there was no obligation to show up or prove anything to anyone. 

Wanda appreciated the sentiment, but she wanted to like parties, to go and have fun with you somewhere other than your living rooms for once. Only on Friday, opening the package of clothes she’d bought under Nat and Agatha’s guidance, that she nearly wavered, but when Maria Hill wandered up to where you were eating lunch and whispered something in your ear scandalous enough to make you blush, Wanda’s jealousy wouldn’t let her back out. 

You didn’t mention that you’d caught her pouting, kept that tidbit to yourself for fun. Instead you smiled and flirted right back, ignoring Wanda’s clearly grumpy demeanor. It wasn’t nice, you shouldn’t have done it when the only girl you cared about was the one who’d made the lovely wrap you’d been eating before you got interrupted. 

Once she was gone, you tried smoothing it over with a hug and an apology, but Wanda was smart enough to see right through it, shoving you hard back into your chair and calling your behavior gross. She was still huffy when you left her that afternoon, half expecting her to call off your plans, but she only mumbled out a warning not to be late and shut the door in your face. You only parted for a short while, but in that time, Wanda had a lot to do; she’d been nervous enough without having seen Maria’s little display.

As she sat at her desk, willing a steady hand to apply the eyeliner she so rarely wore, her brain fell back on what it did best: overthink. Visions of the two of you arriving as a pair, just for you to leave her as soon as you found someone better to dance with or talk to, or worse, the whole party being a front for some long game joke, poked at her fragile determination. You’re being annoyingly irrational, she scolded herself, recalling instead the times you stood up for her or held her hand when you crossed the street. Sure, Wanda might have issues with the easy way you lead some of the girls in your classes on, but she refused to let her mind turn you into something you’d never hinted at being. 

The brunette checked the time on her phone before sliding her outfit over her head and as she popped her head and shoulders through the top, her eye caught the device screen light up on its own, a message from you appearing. Wanda read over your cutely apologetic words with a smile, laughing at the I’m sorry sticker attached and quickly typed a response promising forgiveness if you bought her coffee next week. To which you readily agreed and gave her one last minute reminder that you wouldn’t be mad if she decided in the past hour she wasn’t keen on seeing anyone she didn’t want to. No, you weren’t like Carol or Brock, nowhere close to Vision; Wanda didn’t think you could be if you tried.

You were right on time, wanting to tread lightly in case Wanda’s text was more her being polite than actually over your lunch shenanigans, knocking briskly even though you’d texted her you were coming as you locked your apartment door. You expected she’d maybe do her hair and makeup differently, something to fit the night; what you didn’t expect was a whole new Wanda opening the door. “Woah…”

The black dress hugged Wanda’s curves perfectly, accentuating places you’d only felt briefly before. She’d worn sleeveless dresses around you, but this strapless design wrapped around her arms paired with the long hair she’d tied back into a ponytail revealed her neck and shoulders completely… you realized you’d been staring too long when Wanda waved a shy hand in front of your stunned face. “Do I look okay? I think I have enough time to change-”

“Don’t you dare.” You tugged Wanda out the door before she could continue second guessing. And then, being the reassurance you didn’t know Wanda needed so terribly, you slung your arm around her, mostly in an excuse to touch newly exposed skin, speaking loud enough she was sure the whole floor could hear you, “You look hot and if anyone tells you different, they’re lying through their teeth.” 

Hearing that, Wanda already felt like she’d call tonight a win.

♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡ ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡

From the moment you stepped through the door, Wanda garnered attention. Not that everyone flew to her side immediately; most didn’t recognize her and if they did, they didn’t know where to even start talking. Most people she went to school with left her alone, a select few people having crafted and weaved stories about the brunette that meant everyone tended to keep their distance. Wanda didn’t mind, really she preferred it; amongst her peers she was completely out of her depths. Small high school gatherings were intimidating enough, and college only added more to the attendance list.

 If you minded her clinging to your side you didn’t say it, relaxed and talking to whoever you pleased all while checking in on Wanda every few minutes. To her credit, Wanda did engage in conversation occasionally, commenting or laughing when something was funny enough. Sitting down, Wanda thought she’d get more time to talk to you, not about anything specific but just to keep your attention. You weren’t brushing her off, no, you were actively listening, nodding your head, everything… but she wanted you sitting closer, asking her to dance, anything.

Wanda wondered if maybe she was going about it the wrong way, working up confidence to ask you herself when mid-sentence, Maria plopped herself down in your open lap and wrapped her arms around your neck. “Hey you…”

For the first time tonight, Wanda felt ignored, her presence non-existent to the grinning girl who so easily disrupted the conversation. You didn’t play into her like you did at lunch, having learned your lesson that an angry Wanda wasn’t a Wanda you wanted to focus your way, but you didn’t want to be rude or cause a scene so you let her stay put for now and hoped Wanda didn’t hold it against you later. “A few of us are gonna play a little game upstairs if you want to join in?”

Wanda watched your face light up, seemingly ignorant to how much the other girl already reeked of alcohol. You loved a good party game, nodding your agreement without a second thought. “Wouldn’t miss it for the world, we’ll be right up.”

“Oh yeah...” Maria finally glanced over, a pitying pout on her lips that Wanda felt the strangely aggressive urge to slap off. “Wanda, have you played Never Have I Ever?” The answer was a big resounding no and all three of you were well aware, a game she’d seen countless times on television and never sat down to play. You followed Maria’s lead, sizing up Wanda, but out of compassion rather than anything else. 

In that split minute of silence, Wanda had two choices: be honest and back out or rely on her limited knowledge, go with you, and hope for the best. Maybe she’d have chosen the former if she could read your thoughts, know for sure you wouldn’t leave Wanda alone down here amidst strangers and wisps of smoke— but she didn’t.

“Of course I know how to play, don’t be silly!” The answer was enough for Maria who stood with a wobble and pulled your hand to follow, but your eyes stayed firmly stuck on Wanda. Her words might’ve been confident, but lacquer-polished fingers played with her new array of metal rings and you instantly knew she was lying. You wouldn’t call her bluff in the present company, but your furrowed brow gave away your worries. Wanda tried smoothing them away with a smile, polite as ever, beaming up at Maria who stood in front of you, annoyed that you hadn’t yet budged. “Like she said, we’ll be right up.” 

Maria shrugged, not caring enough to disinvite Wanda upstairs. If she wanted to make a fool of herself, she wouldn’t stop her. “Five minutes or we’re starting without you.” 

Left on your own for the time being, Wanda sprung to her feet  and fixed her dress, letting out a deep breath she didn’t know she’d been holding. It was your turn to take her hand, stopping her in case Wanda decided to sprint up the stairs without you. You did want to play with her, but not if she felt it was an obligation instead of a fun way to pass the time. “Do you really want to? I won’t be mad down here if that’s better.”

“It’s fine!” Heartwarming, really, and Wanda appreciated your sincerity, but you’d never see her as anything other than a friend to be babysat if she didn’t attempt to participate. At least, that’s what Agatha said. Besides, if it was anything like the movies, you could learn things about each other that Wanda was too shy to ask outright. “I want to play! It’ll be fun, please?”

“Wands…” You couldn’t say no to her, not when she looked so excited, swinging your arm back and forth in her hands and adding a pretty please to sway you further. There was a promise you made right then, silently to yourself, to be right next to her and not let things get too out of hand; it couldn’t be that bad under careful supervision.

Supervision you failed to remember would falter as soon as alcohol hit your system.

The game was enjoyable… until Wanda caught on to the point of the game, everyone taking shots and sharing scandalous stories while she was left with nearly all her fingers up. She’d taken exactly one finger down when Carol tried to put her on the spot with “never have I ever bought a vibrator offline” and she prayed the shot she was finally allowed to take dulled her embarrassment quickly. No luck.

“Can I see it some time?” Wanda nearly jumped to her feet when you leaned over, chin resting on her shoulder like you had so many times before. You’d had no problem with the game, only one finger left; a fact Wanda had to keep reminding you of after the double shots you’d taken. 

She pushed you off and you frowned, but let her have her space, your dejected expression nearly pitiful enough Wanda almost felt bad for doing so. Then she remembered the question lingering in the air, the small group going quiet and watching your exchange play out, and suddenly the gentle rejection didn’t feel like nearly enough admonishment. “Why would you want to?”

You shrugged lazily, straightening up as you realized you were the only two left in the game. It was rare you lasted this long, to your recollection at least; Wanda’s nine remaining fingers meant she was unbeatable though. Such an innocent thing… you wished she’d be your innocent thing. Alcohol loosened your tongue, spiraling thoughts of Wanda carefully unboxing the toy as she did with all of her packages bubbling to the surface, running it over in her hands with that adorable scrunched up face she made whenever she focused, experimenting with the various settings. “Just to see how you use it.” 

If you weren’t so inebriated maybe you’d have the presence of mind to keep your words a whisper, but if everyone’s laughs were anything to go by, the entire room heard. Wanda begged to blink and open them to exist anywhere but here, “You’re disgusting.” Basic flirting was hard enough; the last thing she wanted to do was have your first discussion about sex toys while there were people judging her every move.

“What’s the matter, Wanda? Bought it and couldn’t figure out how to use it?” Carol sneered, taking a swig of the vodka she’d brought up for the game straight from the bottle. Wanda wanted to fight her on it, but she couldn’t without exposing some of her most private times and well, they’re called private for a reason. 

The blonde turned to you then, “I thought you wanted to fuck her… shame she hasn’t let you yet.” Wanda whipped around, her worst fears threateningly close to being the truth, but you looked just as shocked.

Maria joined in before you could tell Carol to take it back, leaning across you to really make sure Wanda heard, “You know there’s tons of videos that’ll show you how. All that studying you do, wouldn’t kill you to research something sexy once for a change.” Sober enough to deem that over the line, you pushed Maria away before she could continue her taunts, but words weren’t so easily taken back. Wanda was already mortified beyond belief and you were ashamed it was mostly your fault. 

If clinging to you to hide the stinging tears budding at the corners of her eyes wouldn’t cause more attention, Wanda would’ve fallen into your shoulder in an instant. Not that she was particularly happy with you right now, but what other comfort did she have? Your expression screamed an apology Wanda wasn’t ready to immediately accept and she flicked your forehead in warning, “Don’t say a thing.”

You relented with a sigh, still disappointed with yourself, but resolving to do everything in your power to make up for it. But all Wanda wanted was this terrible game over with, anything to get her out of this cramped room full of people who regarded her like a party trick. Her one advantage was being the last to put a finger down, her turn to announce an action and choose one of the many things you’d done that she’d never gotten close to. Whatever she said would scream innocence, but at this point she couldn’t bring herself to care; Wanda needed you out so she could “win” and get far away from here. “Never have I ever kissed a girl.”

You weren’t fully drunk, buzzed enough to be careless, but not to ignore what everyone was saying. Stupidly, you’d taken Wanda’s earlier insistence to play as an excuse to do so just as hard, personal promise forgotten little by little with each shot you threw back, but one look at her clear distress was sobering. Wise decision making wasn’t your strong suit though, drunk or not. 

She wasn’t that far away, close enough to kiss— so you did, leaning forward until your hands rested on either side of her folded legs. The moment your lips met, the little audience went wild, but you kept it short, only wanting to help, not embarrass her. “Silly girl, you can’t pick something you’ve done. Still won though, not bad for your first time.” 

Wanda was stunned, frozen in place even as everyone broke their circle formation to clean up. Instincts screamed to pull you in for another one, but she knew she shouldn’t. You’d done it to make up for the earlier mess you’d started; you wanted to be nice, not spend your night sharing kisses she couldn’t reciprocate. It was only for the sake of everyone else, to temporarily shut them up… a first kiss to placate and entertain.

When you looked at her again, Wanda saw the beginnings of pity and she couldn’t stand it, not from you. Especially not after that. “I’m going to grab a soda, I’ll be downstairs.” 

“Did you want me to go with-” She was up and out before you could get a word in and you sighed, standing slowly to save your head some pain. “Great, see you down there…”

Going off by herself was near the very bottom of Wanda’s smart ideas, but she didn’t have it in her to explain, to pretend to be okay when she wanted to shake you and ask why’d you be so stupid at the worst possible time. 

♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡ ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡

Everything happened in a series of threes, good or bad; her father lived by that philosophy. The second Brock wandered into the otherwise empty kitchen, having been seeking her out, Wanda started believing him. First the never have I ever experience from hell, second, you playing said game, and now this way too drunk man stumbling closer; Wanda was more than ready for a good streak any time now.

“Wanda! There you are!” His words were slurred, strung together so messily Wanda wondered if he’d remember in the morning that he’d actually smiled at her. She tried to ignore him, looking at any variety of kitchen accessories she spotted around the room, but Brock was never one to be quiet when given space to speak. “Praying away your first kiss all alone in here?”

“You know that’s not how that works.” Wanda rolled her eyes, taking a step back only to meet the cold kitchen counter. And again, Brock came closer. 

In a perfect world he wouldn’t intimidate her, not even a foot away, his obnoxiously loud laughter pushing his alcohol soaked breath her way, but she couldn’t help it, instinct inching her farther even as his big steps closed the distance. “What I do know is how rude it is to leave someone in the dust right after they kiss you. You ran off so quickly!”

Wanda’s hands tightened around her soda can, denting the aluminum as she counted down however long she had left to endure this. “I didn’t kiss you, it’s none of your business.”

“I could have once, remember?” Unnerved as she was, Wanda still hit Brock’s hand away as quickly as his calloused fingertips grazed her cheek, a hard slap that faded his smug grin into a glower. “You’re just too good at running away.”

“Hands off, Rumlow.” Where you’d come from Wanda didn’t know, but she was never more relieved to see you. It took you longer than you wanted to admit navigating the house, asking first if anyone had seen your date and then, where the kitchen was. Finding her just in time is what mattered most, speeding across the kitchen to put space between Wanda and your classmate slowly, but surely crowding her in. 

You hadn’t heard their conversation, but it didn’t matter. There were exactly zero scenarios you could imagine Wanda willingly talking to Brock, much less with him as close as he was. Boorishly, he raised his hands in the air, backing away without nearly enough shame as he should’ve. “What, is she your girlfriend now? Like, for real?”

Wanda didn’t speak up to correct him, but neither did you, still unsure what you called someone you’d fantasized about more than acted on those with. This was Brock you were talking about though, and he out of anyone didn’t need to know another bit of information about Wanda than he already did.

Ignoring an answer, you held Wanda similarly to how you had a few days ago, arms about her waist, but this was more possessive, more urgent—  another spectacle Wanda longed to hate, but the security your embrace offered left her swooning. She would die happy if she could stay in your arms like this forever; just preferably not in Carol’s kitchen. “Why, jealous?” 

Your hand on her ass should’ve made her cringe; if it was anyone else, maybe she would, but this left her knees weak. To your shock, Wanda didn’t move and Brock’s hazy eyes bounced between the two of you, not willing to fight for someone he didn’t deem worth the effort. “Of your newfound celibacy? No thanks.”

“Well fuck off then, find someone else to piss off.” When you kissed her cheek, it was equal parts to drive him away as it was to calm Wanda’s nerves and by some miracle, it worked for both. Once he disappeared from view, you offered her another, two in succession when she didn’t twist away. “Sorry for taking forever, couldn’t find you… you’re really fast, you know.”

“The game was over so I left.” Wanda tossed her empty and squashed can into the pile atop the overfilled trash can nearby, needing her hands free to affectionately pat your arms. She expected you to let her go again, but you only held tighter. “What-”

Turning Wanda around, you leant against the counter, bringing her with you until she had no choice but to settle between your legs. “You have a cute ass,” Two hands cupped her backside now, squeezing covered flesh as if there weren't dozens of people that could walk in at a moment’s notice. “Why didn’t I know that?”

“Because you hardly look at me,” the brunette mumbled, willing herself to relax as you touched her. You only acknowledged her with a low hum, burying your nose in the crook of her neck, sighing as you caught the familiar light floral scent of her perfume. Curious fingers skirted over her hip, following the tight hem of Wanda’s dress along her upper thigh. She shuddered against you, fingers tugging at your shirt, grounding herself as she wiggled against your front. Wanda hadn’t expected to enjoy such shameless groping, but tonight was just full of surprises. 

You’d be more than happy to spend the rest of your time here, exploring her at your leisure, all else forgotten, but your dream was over way too soon. The tired girl wormed her way out of your grasp, instantly missing your warmth, but needing to stop before you were discovered. She wanted to be the type not to care who caught you, wanted to let you hold her tight and kiss her hard right here in the kitchen, but her nerves got the better of her. “You’re drunk, don’t do that here.”

You could insist you weren’t that drunk, completely sober enough to know exactly what you’re up to, but you’d already pushed your luck being so bold after embarrassing her earlier. “Here? Sooo.. you’d let me do it somewhere else?” 

Wanda ignored her hopes soaring at the prospect of you wanting to try again. Not for show or to shut anyone up, but because you wanted her. You saw it on her face, pupils blown wide and fidgeting hands; the girl wore her emotions on her sleeve, and damn if you didn’t want to convince her to let you drag her upstairs to some unoccupied room and have your way with her, but you tried to make peace with just knowing Wanda didn’t completely shut the idea down.

 “I don’t know! Maybe…” This wasn’t the place to discuss how much she craved your touch, much less her feelings on the matter; for Wanda, parties weren’t right for anything she needed right now. Suddenly Wanda felt overwhelmed all over again, brain scrambled and wanting too many unrelated things at once, and the loud bass and equally loud house was too much. 

She’d given it a real effort for you and it wasn’t all bad, but trying to fit in with a group of people who thrived on being high school mean girls even into adulthood? Wanda didn’t want to play that game and as much as she wanted to trust you, she couldn’t take anything you did around them seriously, uncertain if this was all just to show off or genuine interest. “I think I’m going to go…”

You couldn’t say it caught you off guard, not with how the night had gone. Hours ago when you’d first seen her, Wanda stood tall, happy and excited for her first real party; taking in her slumped shoulders and turned down gaze broke your heart. You hoped your disappointment didn’t show because none was for her, all towards you instead, feeling like you’d failed at every turn to keep her safe and relaxed. “There’s no way I’m letting you walk across campus alone in the middle of the night.”

“Well I can’t be here anymore, I’m done.” Staying in this house a minute longer made Wanda want to throw up; she wanted the cozy familiarity of her apartment and her bed, to sleep until tonight was a far off memory. She hadn’t come with much thankfully, only her keys you’d kept tucked safe in your jacket, but you tucked the pocket behind you as she went to reach for it.

“I never said you couldn’t leave,” Stepping forward, you took Wanda by the hand, but didn’t tug her closer, trying to let her have her space even when you wanted to give her the hug she looked like she so badly needed. If Wanda was leaving then you would too, having lost your interest in the party as soon as you saw hers vanish upstairs. “I’m walking you home.”

Guilt crept in quickly and Wanda instantly tried reassuring you, but you wouldn’t hear it, determined not to let her walk off this time. She was upset, you’d seen it on her before, a dark cloud dampening her naturally cheery demeanor; you wouldn’t leave her like that again. “You’re the hottest girl here, I’d rather spend time with you anyways.”

“Alright, but I’m going to bed.” Wanda hit your shoulder, turning her back to you before her smile gave her away. ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡ ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡

It was cold outside with autumn rolling in, but Wanda was grateful for the quiet. The walk back to your building was short in theory, but grew longer with the brunette doing most of the navigation. You were just a bit too distracted to focus on where you were going, but you’d always remember to follow Wanda anywhere. While dragging along behind her, your eyes remained firmly stuck on her bare shoulders, illuminated whenever you passed under a streetlight, and when you caught her shivering, you were quick to rush in. 

“Are you cold?” She wasn’t for long between your engulfing hug and the heat bursting through her body as your lips kissed along the expanse of exposed skin. It was impossible to walk like this, your hands splayed over her stomach as you clung to her from behind, preoccupied with the new opportunity to touch her rather than getting inside. 

Wanda tried anyways, steps heavy on the sidewalk as she took your weight with her. “I won’t be cold if you let us go home.” She was right of course, often was, but it didn’t stop you from staying attached to her the rest of the way. 

You’d run to the bathroom as soon as she unlocked the door and Wanda made a beeline for her bedroom— where she’d forgotten all about the short white nightgown she’d laid out right before she left. An outfit change planned for the version of her that returned from the party confident, a lot more drunk, and ready to fall in bed with you for a whole different reason than she was now. 

Frazzled, Wanda grabbed the satin garment and shoved it to the back of her closet until it was hidden from view. Her typical safe pajama set was the new choice, shedding her party dress to pull loose shorts over her hips, buttoning the last button on her top just as you emerged from the bathroom. 

Letting you do whatever you needed to do to be ready for bed, Wanda went to the kitchen, pouring glasses of water and picking up her bottle of ibuprofen she knew you’d need in the morning. When she returned, you were already under the covers, head against the headboard and absentmindedly scrolling your phone. “Glad to see you made yourself comfortable.”

You expected her to say more, either talking about the night or give you some random fact as she sometimes did, but after Wanda was firmly in bed, lights off, not even the television on, the typically comfortable silence between you two felt suffocating. “You’re being quiet.” 

“I’m quiet a lot.” She said it plainly, not even a hint of emotion behind her words and when that was all, you had to do something about it. Sitting up once more, you scooted over until you were sat in front of her, sizing up the worry rolling off of Wanda in waves. 

That nightgown was a painful reminder of how badly she felt she’d failed this whole party thing; there was no lingering high from buzzing events, no giggles or wandering hands like Natasha hinted might happen if she’d done any number of certain things. No, Wanda had run from you, pushed those wandering hands away, played off shoulder kisses as nothing short of an annoyance and now… now you weren’t touching her at all. If you went back to your place, she wouldn’t be surprised, but she dreaded being alone right now, left not only to wallow in self-pity, but properly unkissed. It was all too miserable to say aloud. 

You waited until she conquered her visible hesitation, but when Wanda sighed, more interested in fidgeting with her blankets than speaking up, you decided it was time to step in with reassurance. “You did really well tonight. I hope you know you really didn’t have to come with me, but I’m happy you did and you looked beautiful.”

Wanda gave a bitter chuckle, shaking her head in disbelief, “You’re not upset you had to watch me all night and make sure I wasn’t completely falling apart?”

“What? No! I had a good time!” A different time than what you were used to, but not bad. Really you didn’t mind looking out for her, felt honored she even trusted you to do so. You’d gone home with the best person in that place; you’d love to be doing something different with her right about now to round out your night as usual, especially when you could easily remember how soft and warm Wanda felt against you, but you didn’t want to push her. Except… “Hey Wanda?”

She picked at the stray lint she could barely make out amongst her sheets, trying not to dread whatever else came out of your mouth next, “Yeah?”

“I liked kissing you earlier.” It was the truth, simply put between your exhaustion and intoxication, but honest nonetheless. “Was that really your first time?”

“Well…” She thought about it, wondering long and hard if she could count the years old close call that stuck in her head in her worst thoughts. No, Wanda wouldn’t pay that any mind. “Yes, it was.”

“Oh..” Before you could second guess anymore, you inched closer, leaning in until your faces were inches apart. Wanda was tired, that much was clear, but her eyes still stayed wide, gaze locked on your lips as she licked her own. If the desperation was mutual, one of you might as well do something about it. “Would you like a second?”

Wanda paused, not because she didn’t want it, she did so terribly badly, but it scared her. All of this, you, scared her. What if you changed your mind? If you only kissed her before to be nice, what did this count as? Back there, you’d been so quick about it, a peck to end the game in your own mischievous way; this time you were free to carry on and she had no idea how to handle that. Were you about to find out she’s a terrible kisser? 

While her thoughts raced, you sat back, giving her space to decide properly. You wanted to kiss her, sure, and with any other girl maybe you would’ve just taken it, but with the careless way you’d taken her first, you couldn’t let Wanda’s second be something she woke up regretting. “You can say no, I won’t be mad-”

In a split second, your world went black, Wanda crashing into you with a strength you didn’t know she had. Her lips were clumsy against yours until you took over, shock dissipating as everything that was Wanda clouded your senses. She’d had enough pushing you away for one night. Here in the privacy of her bedroom, if you really wanted to kiss her, she’d freely admit she needed you to do so. 

Wanda’s arms wound loosely around your neck, acclimating herself to the feel of your kiss. You were slow and inviting, skirting the tip of your tongue along her bottom lip so gently Wanda didn’t say a thing about your hands drawing up her bare legs. Eventually, you eased her back until she laid reclined, deft fingers undoing the bottom few delicate buttons of her pajama set. 

“It’s not fair how sweet your lips are…” You chased her as she broke for air, shifting your weight to kneel between her legs; Wanda was about to ask you what you meant when you slipped. Still lacking all of your coordination, you leaned too close to the edge of the mattress, falling to the floor with a loud thud. When you regained your senses, Wanda’s laughter hit you before anything, loud and uninhibited, and as much as your head ached, you found yourself laughing right along with her.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry but…!” Wanda could barely breathe she was laughing so hard, your dramatic pout way too exaggerated to be real. You looked so pitiful curled up on the floor, rubbing the side of your head; she wanted to kiss you all better. “Come on, come up here. You need to go to sleep.”

You might’ve protested harder if the brunette wasn’t holding out her arms, covers pulled back to let you climb right in. It was an uncoordinated scramble from the carpet into her bed, but Wanda pressed a little kiss into your hair, smoothing it over before guiding you down. “At least I don’t have to sleep down there…”

Head laid heavy on her midsection, snuggled into what felt like the warmest blankets of your life in your drunken state, exhaustion hit you like a freight train. At some point Wanda’s hand snuck into your hair, brushing strays away from your face, nails lightly scratching at your scalp until your eyes fluttered closed. “You’re good at this for someone who’s never gone on nights out.”

“Pietro’s to thank for that,” Wanda laughed again and you heard it against your ear, the smooth, happy rumbling you’d missed all night. “Someone had to pull him back together before morning and it certainly wasn’t going to be dad. He always likes to remind me I’m twelve minutes younger, but I feel years older most of the time.”

She was a natural caretaker, always had been, especially after her mother died, but besides her family she’d never heard that type of compliment from anyone and it helped her relax in this otherwise unfamiliar territory. If nothing else, Wanda knew she could show her affection through some tried and true TLC, but looking after her loud and drunk brother was miles different from the clingy drunken behavior of the crush she’d just been making out with. If you weren’t so cute when you got sleepy, Wanda might’ve exiled you to the couch. 

After a while of nothing, Wanda unintentionally lulling you to sleep with the gentle stroke of her fingers on your head, her thoughts drifted again. “Was Carol right?”

“Hm?” It was too late to have any discussion past something silly, but from Wanda’s tone, you knew it was anything but and you prayed you could keep it together long enough not to look like a complete asshole.

“Did you only ask to hang out to see if you could have sex with me?” Wanda nearly bit her lip to bleeding in the long silence that followed, wavering between thinking you’d finally fallen asleep and convincing herself you were pretending just to avoid giving an answer. She thought about waiting but if that stupid game taught her one thing it was the way alcohol stripped you of all filters; she needed to know for sure, but she couldn’t look you in the eye to ask. Her dark bedroom was the perfect cover for questions she’d never be able to ask after tonight.

“No, of course not.” Truthfully, you hadn’t drunk enough to be anything past buzzed; you’d been stupid earlier for sure, but nothing extreme. If you wanted to lie, you could easily, but you’d never think of it. Not when you’d already let her down repeatedly. “You’re hot though, I would if you wanted me to.” 

“Oh… thank you?” Wanda stiffened and mentally you were kicking yourself, hoping she didn’t kick you out of her bed when you were so warm and cozy right where you were— but then you felt her thighs squirming against your midsection. You wanted to test your hunch so badly, but you knew better. Soon maybe, but not when you were both so painfully tired. Instead you hunkered down, pushed against her until she let you roll onto your stomach between her legs. 

Wanda’s sleep shirt made the perfect cover for her soft tummy, a pillow you were scared you’d miss next time you fell asleep on your own. You dotted it with kisses, mostly the area under the buttons you’d undone, a gentle show of gratitude  before laying your head back. “Mostly I wanted to see if you’re as cute up close. You are: mission accomplished.”

She wanted to shake you for calling her cute again, but it was too late to revert the conversation and she couldn’t exactly jump for her phone and text Natasha without looking obvious. Wanda sighed and settled for running her hands over your shoulders, hoping desperately her breathing stayed even enough to hide her personal panic. Soft snores finally made their way to her ears and her head fell back against actual pillows, waiting for anything to tell her how to make some kind of move. Talking wasn’t it, parties certainly weren’t it… Agatha’s advice was next up. Plan C, she’d called it— Wanda feared Plan C.

#wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff x fem!reader #wanda maximoff x female reader #wanda maximoff fic #wanda maximoff au #wanda maximoff fluff #wanda maximoff series #wanda maximoff imagine #marvel imagine #confessions au. #motts writes. #maximotts

[spookymystery67]

I Wish I Could Walk In Heels

AN: Wow, I missed posting last week. I'm a loser. Sorry. Truthfully I was not fully in it last week, or this week for that matter. But I wanted something posted and it's freaking confession time so I persevered and did it! Whoo! This chapter is a tad bit shorter and I have never, ever written a scene like this before so it was an experience. Hopefully my reading experience didn't make it suck as bad. I'm trying. I really am lmao. Enjoy!

Chapter 18:

The next morning, you said your goodbyes to Jill as she had to leave to finish her mission while you had to make your way back to the hotel you and Ada were sharing. You were sad to leave your friend once again, and you could only hope that life will be kinder to her. Maybe you will run into each other again at some point in the future.

Maybe once Umbrella was gone for good.

You were nervous to walk through the door of the room you shared with Ada. You wanted to tell her how you felt, but your doubt and insecurities were going to make it ten times harder to do.

You took a deep breath and tried to ignore the negative thoughts, before doing the secret knock you and Ada came up with early on, as she has the only key to the room.

You listened for movement from inside as the door abruptly opened and Ada stood in front of you with a deadpan look on her face.

“Y/n. How was your little sleepover?” She asked, tone nonchalant as she walked away, back facing you. You could tell from the way her shoulders have tensed that she was bothered by something.

“Uh, it was good. It was nice catching up with her after so long.” You said as you walked into the room, keeping your eyes on her as you shut and re-locked the door behind you.

Ada huffed as she sorted and packed her things in her duffle bag. “I'm glad you had fun. Start packing your things. We're heading out soon.” She aggressively shoved a dress into her bag.

You hesitated. “Are- are you okay?” 

“Fine.” Ada dismissed.

You hummed, watching her as she was still turned away from you. “You know, we talked about you last night.”

“Did you now?” Ada drawled, uninterested in whatever you and Jill talked about.

You took a slow, hesitant step forward. “Yeah. She brought something to my attention. Something about you.”

Ada paused before slowly turning to face you, arms crossed, hip jutted to her right. “What about me?” She asked, ready to defend herself as she assumed the worst.

You took a deep breath and another hesitant step forward. “She told me you were jealous.”

She raised a brow. “Jealous?”

“Mhmm. Jealous.”

“Jealous of what?”

“Of her. Jealous of the way we interacted with each other.”

She huffed and rolled her eyes. “Right.”

You walked closer to her, now only a few feet apart. “You shouldn't be jealous of her. She's only a friend.” You said before she could speak.

“I'm your friend.” She snapped, arms still crossed as her frustration rose.

You can't help but smile, her feelings for you becoming more clear now that Jill had helped you open your eyes. “You are. And you know I can have more than one friend, right?”

Ada scoffed with an eye roll. “Uh huh.”

You decide to just tell her right now before she becomes more upset. “But… maybe me and you can be something more than just friends.”

Ada's face fell in shock, completely taken aback from the sudden turn in the conversation. “Y-you… I'm sorry. What?” 

Huh, she stuttered. It wasn’t often that you got Ada Wong to stutter.

You take a deep breath. “Look. I've never done this before so there is a good chance that I might embarass myself by saying this but, I like you, Ada. I really like you. And I think I have for a while now. I have always admired you. Even when we first met. The entire time we were in Raccoon City together I was trying to convince myself that I hated you, but I didn't. I don’t. I've always found it very hard to hate you.” You paused, looking down and away from Ada who just stared at you with a look you couldn't quite decipher. You quickly lost what courage you had started with when you couldn’t figure out what she was thinking. “But, um, if you don't feel the same way as I do then that's fine. Just figured I should let you… know.” You finished awkwardly.

From the corner of your eye you saw Ada take a slow step forward, as if she was afraid she would frighten you, before taking another more confident step. Then another, and another.

Once she was close enough, she reached her right hand down to take your chin in a gentle grasp with her pointer finger and thumb, carefully moving your head up to make eye contact with her.

She gave you a moment to allow you to pull away from her if you so choose, before her straight, unreadable, face broke into a warm, gentle smile that she has only ever shown to you.

“Can I kiss you, Y/n?” She asked, her warm smile and gentle grasp on your face still there as she patiently waited for your response.

You were dumbfounded, completely caught off guard, having not at all expected this outcome. Fully expecting to be denied. Not embraced.

Your cheeks flushed as you worked through the brain fuzz her touch caused, quickly nodding your consent. “Yes.”

Her smile widened before she slowly closed the space between the two of you. Her warm, glossed lips, connected with yours almost hesitantly in a slow, but affectionate kiss. Giving you time to get used to it. Used to her. She kept you in a weak hold in case you decided to pull away.

You responded to the hesitation by moving your arms around her to hug her waist, bringing her closer to you in encouragement. Wanting to show her you truly meant every word of your confession. 

You wanted to be more. You wanted to be with her.

She responded to the encouragement with eager, yet gentle, enthusiasm. The hand on your chin moved to be placed on the back of your head as her other hand came up to cup your cheek in her palm, urging you to be closer to her.

The kiss was pure bliss and felt like it lasted for hours, but in actuality it only lasted a few short minutes before you had to pull away. You both gasped for the air that you neglected during the moment you had both waited years for and thought would never happen. Ada looked at you with pure joy and admiration in her eyes that you returned, before she pulled you forward once more for a quick peck on the lips.

“So, that's what you and Jill talked about? Us?” Ada asked after a few moments, your face still held in her hands.

You nodded. “She helped me realize that you might feel the same way I do.”

Ada hummed as she leaned forward, resting her forehead against yours. “I might have to thank her whenever I see her again. She was right. I do like you. In fact, I might even go as far as to say that I love you, Y/n.”

You smiled wide as you laughed, face flushed with pure joy as you pulled your head back slightly to face her properly. “You just had to one up my confession, didn't you.” You teased her.

Ada shrugged with a grin. “I mean, you get full points for admitting it first and getting the ball rolling. But I didn't think you would admit your full feelings for me if I didn't do it first.”

Leave it to Ada to notice that you avoided the L-word for the word like. She was right. You didn't say it first because you didn't want to scare her off for good.

“You're right.” You admitted.

“As usual.” Ada teased, still hugging you close.

“Shut up and let me confess.” You playfully shoved her shoulder, before taking another breath. “I love you too, Ada.”

Her teasing smile softened as she pulled you in for another slow kiss, before pulling away and placing a short peck to your head.

“I’m glad you admitted it first. I had convinced myself you didn’t feel the same way and that it would never happen. Was just going to continue living in the friend zone for the rest of my life.” Ada said as you two separated, her dragging you to sit beside her on the edge of the bed.

“Funny. I was the same way. When Jill first brought it to my attention, I didn’t believe her.” You said as you grabbed her hand in yours.

Ada seemed surprised by your statement. “Why not? You’re smart, hilarious, and kind. Not to mention gorgeous. But I see you for more than just your looks. You’re the first person I’ve met in a while to accept me for me. You don’t try to change every part of who I am. You understand that not everything in this life is simply just black and white. You actually take the time to understand my thoughts and opinions in situations where we disagree.”

“You do the same. Like what happened with the files and Jill.” You pointed out.

She nodded, squeezing your hand. “The point is, you taking the time to have those conversations just proves that you care. That I’m not just a pretty face to you. That I actually mean something to someone. Something to you. It’s been a long time since I’ve had that. So, I love you, Y/n. I mean it.”

You nearly wanted to tear up from her words. The honesty and vulnerability she was showing you right now was something you never thought either of you would have with one another. The fact that she was comfortable enough with you to tell you this made your heart hurt in the best way. 

Instead of crying, you smiled, pulling her into an embrace that made you want to hold on tight and never let go. Ada immediately returned your embrace and held you with the same amount of strength that you held her in. Usually you could only stand hugs with people for a short amount of time. But with her, you would happily stay in her arms forever if she wanted you to. 

“And I love you, Ada.”

#ada wong #resident evil #ada wong x reader #resident evil x reader #jill valentine #leon kennedy #raccoon city #claire redfield

[bellaxgiornata]

This has been the most successful week of writing I've had in a long while, friends! I don't know what's up with my brain this week, but I don't think any of y'all will be complaining about it doing its thing! So far I have unedited rough drafts now complete for:

Safe Haven chapter 17 (Mikey)

Break the Tension part 3 "The Fire" (Matt)

FFTDs "The Recurring Nightmare" (Matt)

Neighbors Prologue (Frank)

I still need to work on editing before I share it, but Break the Tension will be the fic I update next. Though I might share the prologue for the Frank fic if I have time this week, too, because it's shorter. I'm thinking I'll try to hold onto a few of these until I get more rough drafts written because getting moments of free time soon will be scarce for me for a bit (my MIL often watches my son to give my husband and I a bit of a break and she's going to be gone for 5 whole weeks soon).

I'm still working on finishing The Devil at Your Window's next part "Borrowed Scarf" that is almost finished, which is what I'm thinking I'll finish next (hopefully). But there are definitely lots of updates coming!

#bellas story updates #it has been a freakishly successful writing week for me #so y'all have lots of fics coming!!

[ageless-aislynn]

Slow burn and I’m loving it, nobody asked for a time reference in every chapter but I’ve been doing it anyway

Yay, thanks so much for playing along! 😎

Slow burn and I’m loving it, nobody asked for a time reference in every chapter but I’ve been doing it anyway 🤷‍♀️😉 (Halo series) aka "15 Minutes" (John/Reader) ⭐💖⭐

Chapter 6 is going to be super-sized since it's been *coughcough* months since ch5 and has a surprise guest star from the game world in it! No one else might care about the guest star but hey, I do and since I'm steering the boat... *beep beep* GUEST STAR! 😂

Anyway, in lieu of sharing a part of ch6 since it's hopefully going to be appearing this next week 🤞😣🤞 how about I tell you a couple of things I may not have mentioned before about it?

Originally, it was going to be John/OC instead of Reader, which is why she sometimes seems to have a lot more in common with an OC. However, she doesn't have a description, other than the fact she's shorter than John. Beyond that, she can be anyone, so I hope that anybody reading it can still feel like it's easy to project themselves as her, if that's what they'd like. Or that you can read the second tense “you” as being a form of first tense “I” and not consider that she is YOU but just a character you're reading along with. I hope that makes sense, lol! I mainly want my fics to be as inclusive and enjoyable as possible. (Kai has a male Reader over in the companion fic "Recreation" and "No Time" has a gender-neutral Reader with John.)

Also, yes, she does have a name but  I'm honor-bound to not reveal it. 😁(Same for Kai's Reader character in "Recreation;" I gave him a name, too, just so he doesn't feel left out. 😉)

Originally, this was meant to be a one-shot to fill my burning need to give John a hug after Halo 1x06 where the poor guy is practically screaming in pain and slumping down a wall and everybody's just like, "Hm, wonder what's wrong with Chief? Welp, on with my day!"

C'mon, Chief clearly needs a hug! And a medic. But definitely a hug!

Once there was interest to read more about them, though, I began using this as a chance to incorporate a bunch of my favorite tropes to read/write. I also liked the chance to explore a bit of the "ordinary" world that would be going on around all of the adventure and derring-do that Silver Team is embarking on during season 1.

I'm also feeling free to jump in the AU Warthog to weave in and out of canon however it best suits me, lol.

Into the AU party ‘hog, frens! Woo-hoo! (I adore the custom weapons and vehicle skins so much I made a little vid for them, lol.)

I enjoy making up little AU GIFs to go with each chapter but soon realized that it was more of a challenge than I originally expected because, since I don’t want to show any part of the Reader and thus define her skin color, hair color/type/length etc. But I’ll keep coming up with something for as long as I can!

I don’t have a set number of chapters this is projected to run but I’m guestimating... 🤔 quite a few. 😂 There’s still just so much I have planned for them! And I do have an ending for them that will bring us back kinda to the end of s1. The AU Warthog version of s1, anyway!

I’m hoping to get my couple of other Flash WIPs finished off then I’ll be coming back to this and “Recreation” in order to hopefully get them on a bit more timely posting schedule. I would ideally like them both to finish before s2 premieres in Spring 2023. We’ll see!

And there we have it! Thanks again! 😎👍

WIP folder ask game

#wip folder ask game #ask game #authortobenamedlater #thank you #halo #master chief x reader #ageless aislynn

[leviackermanscleaningbuddy]

hi my love ☹️

it's meee!!! i'm sorry i never send asks anymore </3 i've been very busy with college and i just recently finished my last rounds of physical therapy. i also got really sick this week (still... am) and looking at a screen was making my brain all fried up. anyways, here's a lil catch up to your recent works that i wasn't able to send you an ask about, though much shorter and probably not as detailed as usual since my eyes feel like they'll pop out of my face because of this fever. 😭

anyways, absolutely LOVE the prequel series in skz!pack. it's so cute to see how everyone kinda fell into place and how their relationship developed. i'm particularly fond of the fact that hyunjin and changbin were the first with y/n. i honestly thought it'd start with chan or something but i'm digging this. it's exciting and i can't wait to see how minho gets introduced in this. i'm also quite curious about jeongin considering he's the youngest out of all of them. i bet he saw all these older wolves with sparkles in his eyes going 'i need to love all of them'.

moving on, inked petals.... JESS, YOU ENDED THE ANGST! *breakdances*. i thought this day would never come 🥲 lol jk. you have no idea the GRIP i had on my bedsheets when they finally found y/n and brought her home. their reunion got me in shambles, especially her and changbin. their super emotional moment on the way into the house where y/n apologizes and changbin just hugging the life out of her. i want to be y/n... oh and the scream that left me when she and minho had that confrontation in the shower. oh. OHHH. i can't even begin to explain the butterflies that entered my stomach when he started going on about how he could never hate her. i know it's a bittersweet moment but it did get me kicking my legs up and down my bed. i need them to kiss again ASAP. 🥹

oh and the ask the pack asks are fucking hilarious and actually are very fun to read! they're a sweet bunch. the universe you've brough to life has got me in a chokehold, jess. now you got me wondering what the skz!pack's favorite food are. 😭

anyways ily and i hope you're doing well. 🫶 i'll be back to my regularly scheduled asks soon (hopefully).

— 🤍

AHHHH HEY I MISSED YOU SO MUCH!

I hope you’re feeling a little bit better and you’re doing okay. Please don’t ever hesitate to reach out if you need anything. 💜

I love youuuuuuuu! 😘💜

Also. Hang on. Because I think Minho more than delivers in the upcoming chapter. 👀😏

#moots #mutuals #inbox #reply #ask #my submissions #submission #anon #anonymous #sweet nonnie #🤍 anon #ip&mt #inked petals and message tones #skz!pack #skz #stray kids #ot8

[yoonieper]

Helllooooo people! Today is my last day of break so I thought I’d give you guys an update on 1) what’s to come! 2) what to expect throughout the year~

1) So despite me not posting anything (yet!) I did manage to get a couple of fics done throughout the break! One idk if you guys will see for a while (will be explained later) and the other 1 and a half (I guess) will be coming out before the end of the month! Either both this week or one this week and the next! Just doing a bit of looking ahead to March, I have a Hobi fic that should (SHOULD) be posted on his birthday and a fun fun fun fun fun birthday special for Yoongi (hoping 3 fics but one is going to be a stretch getting done lolll)! Idk if I’ll have time to do any other oneshots because of the special so those are the fics you should be getting in these coming weeks!

2) Alright so I took some time during the break to sort of plan what fics I wanted to get done and posted, that lead me to ultimately making a decision idk how you guys will feel about, but should be better in the long run in me trying to get things done. So (spoiler!) one of the fics you’ll get this month will be the next part of Pecattiphilia, if any of you guys are keeping up with that series then you might have noticed it has been an entire year since part 3 was posted (😅)… I ain’t even gon mention how long it’s been since part 2 of Secrets of the Sea was posted (also hint hint part 3 is coming soon)…. but yeah you guys may notice that updates are realllyyyyy slow for series. I hate leaving you guys waiting but there are some periods where I don’t write for a while but then when I come back I’m more interested in getting a one shot done that can be posted and completed immediately rather than waiting for a moment when I can prioritize the series again. That’s led to major time gaps between chapters being posted. I talk about how many drafts I have piled up but I have even more ideas that I want to write for you guys that hasn’t been started yet.

Ultimately I’ve decided— this year I will be prioritizing oneshots and in 2024 I’ll be dedicating it basically to 80% of the time next year into finishing and finally posting the series I have already posted and the ones I’ve already started so hopefully by the end of the year you’ll have a nice variety! I have series posted/planned for 5 of the members so far and more (I have a bunch for Yoongi) for some of them.

Tryna post as much as I can since most the members are leaving this year, so that’s why oneshots will be prioritized. I may or may not post part 5 of Pecattiphilia this year (just depends on timing) and I also SHOULD be able to finally post my big big big project that I’ve been working on for years sometime later this year (which is a series)— besides these things this year, oneshots will pretty much be the majority of content and boy… I am so excited to get some of these ideas out >:)

This is all to say, this is the plan for series moving forward. For shorter series (ex Beyond) I will complete the series entirely before posting all parts and for longer works I will try to get them mostly completed so there won’t be too long of a wait for the final parts!

I will see you guys soon! Get excited, there are some fun things in store 😘

#yoonieper updates

[em-writes-stuff-sometimes]

Hi how are you? c: I'm glad if you see my message, there's no rush if you don't want to answer

I have some points to tell you:

First of all I come to tell you that you are a magnificent writer, you capture with excellent precision the feelings, the thoughts of the characters, I also thank you for taking the time to make each chapter with so much dedication and effort that is reflected, giving your readers a chapter to shout , cry, wherever we are reading, take the time you need to make the chapter, we are going to wait the necessary time, do not lose that shine that has characterized you and that has fascinated us for your magic when transmitting each description the situations that have arisen leaving us with the intrigue each chapter

Second I have an idea, I don't know if you're going to accept it for sure, but it's worth trying… well in the next installment you'll see in the sequel in dōnus riñus (sweet girl) I was wondering if we're going to see Daemon with short hair like in the series or when reader is pregnant and sees that change of look she is horny due to hormones, she would not know what to do, no matter what the plot is, the truth is that I have not stopped thinking about it and I needed to tell you in a way or another this idea, besides I think I needed more chapters in the series with that change of look because it was too hot, more than it is, I don't know what you think in that aspect

Third, are we going to see Reader later finding out about the adventure that her sister had with Ser Criston in her youth? Because poor Raeder doesn't know most of the little gossip about her family that was about 10 years ago, and she wants to know How did it happen and they don't give you an answer to that

Fourth I hope you have a nice weekend and start of the week, that all your loved ones are well, and that you are doing well in your life

Sorry if I wrote something wrong, English is not my second language, but I'm trying, and I can't wait for chapter 12 uwu 7u7

00:00

Thank you so so much for this lovely comment, I'm so grateful that you have enjoyed my writing! It's been so unbelievably amazing reading all this great feedback and seeing people respond so kindly to this grotty little smut-verse I've blurted out onto your screens lol. I am really close to finishing off the chapter, just tightening up some dialogue and really trying to nail the smut so that it's a good ending to the instalment (but not the series, more is coming!).

I don't have any major plans to lop his hair off, though I was really into it in Episode 4 lol (though admittedly I don't know if it was the hair or the fucked-up behaviour he was exuding that drew me in more); I had a little thought that maybe he ties all his hair back and that really does it for horny Reader lol. I may end up going back and writing a prequel-prequel fic when Reader is a child and make reference to his shorter hair (I know it's squicky, but god help me I really like the idea of reinforcing the uncomfortableness of this pairing by reminding everyone that at one point in time Reader was his baby niece, not just a hot young lady lol).

I think Reader's gonna have to find out about Criston and Rhaenyra, especially as Criston's behaviour towards her gets weirder and weirder; it might serve to contextualise some of her confusion about why in the hell Criston is so strangely protective of her (I have this headcanon that Criston took his role as Reader's shield a little too seriously, and conflated all his hero worship of Rhaenyra into protecting this perfect little princess who turns out to be just like any normal non-godly woman when she demonstrates she's into getting dicked down lol).

Thank you so much for the well-wishes; I'm having a bit of a hard time personally right now, and all this is the BEST most AMAZING escape from my shitty life, so thank you to everyone! Hopefully, Chapter 12 will be out soon!

#fanfiction comments

[theblackoutbooks]

Status update 8/1/22

Currently working on a short little animation. Gonna grind through it this week and then upload it to youtube. I still need to make a channel though.

There currently aren't any fully finished TB pages. This is because to avoid repetitiveness and boring myself, i skip around to different scenes to outline/color just a bit of. I do have quit a bit done, its just kind of spread out randomly though the book. I've drafted the prologue and chapter 1, and im currently drafting chapter 2, and getting close to finishing the script for chapter 3.

I think book 1 will actually end up being shorter than i initially intended it to be. As always, i had been too ambitious with how much i wanted to get done. This won't effect the story at all, nothing will be shortened, and it will still end off at a good point, just not the point it was originally going to. I've had to reformat a few things since this means book 2 will start and end at different places as well, but it hasn't been a problem. I never even really had a good estimate of how many books will be in this series to begin with, so im figuring that out as i go. But judging by my current progress, there'll probably end up being more books then i had roughly guessed there would be! I also want each book to be longer than the last like how harry potter is so idk, we'll see.

Had an interview at in n out but didnt get the job unfortunately. It feels like ive already applied for a billion different jobs. Hopefully ill get one soon so i can start buying ads for TB and whatnot. Wish me luck.

Edit: i didn't end up getting the job :(

#status update

[artbymavy]

Chapter 3 just posted!

summary:

It's been 13 years since the end of the world began. It's been 2 since its total collapse. How much longer can its survivors hold out? And how can they hope to save themselves?

#zukka #atla #avatar: the last airbender #zuko #sokka #writing #My writing #Miranda Writes #bit of a shorter chapter this week but hopefully will have more finished soon!!

[evieismol]

Chapter 3 of my still yet to be named national park ranger gt story, this one is a bit shorter. As always comments questions and critiques are welcome!

Word count: 793

Warnings: n/a

Previous Chapter

It had been two weeks since the meeting, and two days since Dave and the other humans had gotten moved into employee housing. Moved into in the past tense might be the wrong turn of phrase, actually. He had yet to unpack more than the essentials. The perk of being involved in…well, whatever you wanted to call this “project” was that they apparently didn’t get roommates. So that was a win at least.

He hadn’t made up his mind about whether or not the price was worth it yet. He had seen Easton twice since they’d first met, including the day prior. He had also heard he would be working with Easton and John in the coming days. That revelation had caused his stomach to turn. Easton did seem nice enough. Actually, maybe overly nice in a people pleasing sort of way. If he had been human, Dave probably would have said he was chill. However, he was not.

A knock on the door interrupted Dave’s worries. He headed over, opening it to reveal Angie standing there.

“Hey, I’m bored,” she said. “Are you busy?”

Dave glanced back at the unpacked bags behind him. He shook his head.

“No, not really. Did you have something in mind?”

“There’s a viewpoint we could walk to. Might be pretty.” She suggested.

“I’m down, let me grab my backpack,” Dave said.

They were walking down the dusty dirt road towards the viewpoint moments later.

“So, had you ever met someone from Aphiriel before?” Angie asked.

“What?”

“Well, Gus and I answered the question the other day, so I was wondering if you had.”

Dave was silent for a moment, trying to weigh how to answer. Finally, he said, “Yeah. Once. You seemed to get along well with Easton.” He attempted to change the subject as smoothly as possible.

“Yeah, he seems nice. I was going to visit him and John at some point. Y’know, make sure they feel welcome to the park service and stuff. You could come,” Angie offered.

“I’ll see if I have time,” Dave said. He had already decided that he wouldn’t. Or more, would only have as little time as was required to spend with his giant coworker in general. They continued up the trail, talking about what they had been up to since they’d last seen each other. Dave kept the subject as far away as he could from their present situation by telling Angie various humorous stories about his time in Yellowstone.

“He just ate all your food?” Angie asked, laughing in disbelief.

“I swear to god, I’m not shitting you. I thought the date was going well, I get up to go to the bathroom, I come back - plate’s empty. He looks at me and says it was great pasta,” Dave said.

“How long were you in the bathroom? If he had time to eat an entire plate of pasta?” Angie asked.

“That’s the weirdest part! I was gone like, two minutes tops. He had to have scarfed it down as soon as I left.”

“That’s so weird. Did he say anything like why?”

Dave shook his head. “Nope. He was just like ‘I figured you weren’t hungry’. So, we obviously didn’t have a second date.”

Angie snorted. “I hope not.”

They reached the top of the viewpoint. It offered some gorgeous views of the surrounding area, as well as the employee housing and Easton’s lodging.

“I think this’ll be a fun summer,” Angie said.

“Yeah, I guess,” Dave said.

They stayed up at the view point for a while, chatting about life at large. As the sun began to dip beyond the horizon, Angie hopped off the bench she’d been sitting on.

“I should probably go get ready to see Easton and John,” she said. “Are you sure you don’t want to come? I’m sure it’s the more the merrier.”

Dave shook his head. “I should probably finish unpacking. Have fun, though.”

“Alright. Well, let me know if you change your mind. You gonna stay up here?”

Dave hesitated, then nodded. “Yeah. I’ll see you later.”

“Hopefully, since I live right next door,” Angie said with a laugh. She headed down from the lookout point. As she made her way down the steep dirt trail, she idly looked back up at it, and wondered how Easton’s height compared. She felt like he was almost the same height, though she’d always been bad at estimating.

Dave watched Angie make her way down the hill. He looked out at the valley beyond, bordered in the distance by tall mountains. Angie’s enthusiasm about the summer was almost infectious, though it didn’t fully distract from his uneasiness. From the memories of that night years ago that he had tried to hard to forget.

#g/t #giant/tiny #sfw g/t #gt #g/t oc #g/t community #gt writing #g/t writing #g/t story

[therealvalkyrie]

Painter’s Hands and Guatemalan Coffee: Part 6

sketch

Pairing/setting: Levi Ackerman x Female!Reader, modern!college!AU

Summary: When you catch your idiot boyfriend cheating, your grumpy roommate is there to pick up the pieces and watch your back as you toe a carefully drawn line in the metaphorical sand.  

Word Count: 2.1k

Warnings: fluff, romantic vegetable chopping, the chapter of realizing things

AN: Well, it’s been six fucking months, but it’s finally here!! It’s a little shorter than I’d prefer, and took a lot of iterations to get here, but I’m very satisfied:) Thanks, as always, to my lovely @doinmybesthere for editing and encouraging. I hope you all enjoy! I think there’re maybe 1 or 2 parts left in this story, that’ll hopefully be out more quickly than I managed this one. Please let me know what you think! Be kind to yourselves and others. ~valkyrie

—

(read chapter 5 here)

Finals week passes in a slow blur, barely leaving enough time for you to breathe between essays, exams, and one presentation that you think takes at least a year off the end of your life. It’s much the same for everyone else, as well — you barely see Levi, not counting the nights you spend alternating between your bed and his, and you don’t see Hange at all. Consequently, there’s no opportunity to break apart what happened on Saturday. No chance to peel back its layers and find how you really feel. Although, to her credit, Annie doesn’t appear again, so you’re able to shove it into a corner of your mind for the time being.

Saturday brings with it both a new winter storm and an overwhelming sense of relief. You let it fill you completely as you sit and watch snow swirl outside. The street below your kitchen window is bustling with students trying to outrun the storm to get home for vacation. But you have nowhere to be, nothing to do. It’s nice.

The door opens, bringing with it the stomping of Levi’s boots. You turn to watch him shake snow from his hair, sinking deeper into the reassurance of knowing that everything you need is here under your roof. Safe.

Hmm. What the fuck?

You choke on the next sip of your tea as the realization of what you just felt hits you square in the chest. Through your coughing and hacking, you reach again for that fleeting sense of home. Childish, content, warm.

“Are you okay?” Levi calls from the entrance, looking at you with pinched brows halfway through hanging up his jacket.

“Fine,” you cough out, pushing back from the table to hunch over and catch your breath. “I’m okay.”

It takes a moment for you to stop breathing hard, though when you do, your heart rate doesn’t return to normal, instead pushing blood to your face and neck and making your body feel light. Levi doesn’t help when he finally joins you in the kitchen, all floppy hair and bright cheeks from the snow. All leisurely about the way he stretches his lean body to take his favorite blend of Earl Grey from the top of the fridge.

“I was thinking about dinner,” he starts, completely oblivious to the way you’ve started sweating under your cardigan. “We shouldn’t order because of the snow, so I brought home stuff to make soup.”

“What kind?” It’s a miracle the words come out normally.

“Chicken noodle.” He turns to face you. “My mom’s recipe.”

—

“I don’t get why guys are always so uppity about kitchen knives,” you say, picking up what Levi’s told you is a utility knife. “Like, it’s just a knife. I’m not about to stab myself with it.” Your finger drags along its sharp edge for only a split second when Levi’s slim fingers are suddenly around your wrist.

“Don’t. Touch. The knives,” he growls, taking the utility knife gently from your other hand and placing it back on the counter. “I just sharpened them last week, you could’ve seriously cut yourself.”

His steel eyes hold yours for another long moment until you nod your head mutely. You haven’t been able to shake the knot of hyperawareness that’s been settled in your belly since your what the fuck moment, and it only twists tighter when he’s so close to you. His hair is dry now, curling slightly because he hasn’t bothered to comb it since he got home. You have to actively resist the urge to twist a particularly enthusiastic curl around your finger in the split second before he backs away again.

Muttering under his breath, he returns to the simmering pot on the stove that he claims has turned into stock, though you hardly believe it. Growing up, you’d never been taught kitchen skills, let alone anything close to actual labor.

For a while, you’re content to watch, sitting at the table and nursing both the ache in your chest and a fresh cup of chamomile, but the urge to join him in his quiet work overwhelms you as he’s washing the vegetables.

“Levi, please, can I help?” Your tone edges on whining, prompting him to huff and shift on his feet. “I promise I won’t touch the knives! There, just, must be something I can do.”

You see him roll his eyes, swear under his breath, then turn towards you with a glower.

“No talking, no questions, and go wash your hands.”

“Yes!” you cheer and stand up with a bounce.

The scent of the bar of soap as you lather and wash cuts pleasantly through the spices and thick scents already filling the kitchen. It’s not something you’ve experienced often, and you relish in what you realize must be home comfort, your grin settling from enthused to contented.

Levi is arranging carrots, celery, and onions next to the cutting board when you join him again.

“I thought I wasn’t allowed to touch the knives?”

“You’re not, until I show you how to do it without chopping off your fingers.”

“Oh, ye of little faith,” you tease, but nevertheless settle in beside him to watch as he lines up a carrot and picks up the utility knife.

“We’re generally going for even pieces, though it doesn’t matter much because it’s a soup. Put your fingers like this,” you lean over a bit to see how he’s arranged his left hand holding the carrot, the tips of his fingers just barely tucked under the knuckles, “so that you can chop like this—“ he begins slicing, knife guided by his knuckles “—and not lose your fingers. Always point the blade away from yourself and others, and never hold the handle like you’re going to stab something. That’s not effective, anyway. If you have to use this as a weapon, it’s much more effective to slash rather than stab, considering bone density—“

“Uhh,” you cut in, “pause. Are we slicing carrots or fending off home invaders?”

He stops chopping. “What did I say about asking questions?”

“Right. Sorry.”

“Anyway. Considering bone density, you’ll have better luck aiming to cut big veins than forcing through ribs.”

He’s done with the first carrot, now, lithe fingers flipping the knife so the blade is up.

“Never drag the blade along the surface sideways. Flip it over and use the blunt edge to move food.” He demonstrates, moving the little pile of carrot slices to a corner of the cutting board. “Your turn.”

And then, like it’s nothing, he’s offering you the handle with a flat expression.

“Uhm.” You press your lips together and eye it for a long pause. “Are you sure?”

“It’s just a carrot. You’ll be fine.” He lets another unsure moment slide into being, then sighs and reaches out to wrap your hand around the handle. “Here, like this.”

And like you’ve suddenly stepped into a poorly-written romcom, he’s guiding your hands under his to the next waiting carrot, curling your fingers exactly like he showed you before, and scooting over to let you stand in his place. You just let yourself go along with it, hoping desperately that he won’t feel your hands grow clammy or see the way your chin has tucked itself shyly to your chest so you can watch.

Fucking shit carrots, useless goddamn root vegetable, can’t chop itself, has to make me do all the work—

Your aggressive inner monologue takes you all the way through the second carrot, then his hands are leaving yours and he’s placing a third under your waiting blade. Time to fly solo.

—

When you fall asleep in the armchair that night, sated and full of comfort food, Levi sketches in pencil on scrap paper. He sketches his hands over yours in the kitchen and he sketches the steam rising from the pot on the stove. He sketches you sitting with a bowl of soup in your lap, face illuminated by the TV and he sketches your sleeping body curled up, hair in your mouth. He sketches a close-up of your face, with special attention to the curve of your bottom lip, and he considers it practice for finishing the painting in his room.

Levi doesn’t think about how if he doesn’t do something soon, all of this will change. About how you’ll get over your heartbreak and move out at the end of the year and he won’t see you every day and every night. And he definitely doesn’t think about how he’ll have to adjust back to sleeping without your soft body tangled in his, and he doesn’t wonder how he ever slept before you.

No, instead of thinking, he just cracks his knuckles and gently scoops you from the chair and into his arms.

It’s as he’s climbing into his side of your bed that you stir and snort and blink sleepy eyes open.

“What time is it?”

“Ten forty,” he whispers, “go back to sleep.”

You hum and turn on your side to face him, face half hidden by the squish of your pillow. He settles more comfortably in, tucks your head under his chin even though you’re taller than he is, and drapes his free arm around the curve of your waist. 

Quiet breathing is the only thing that fills the room for a long while, and he finally thinks you’ve drifted back off, when:

“Hey, Levi?”

“Hmm?”

“I... I’ve been thinking a lot, and...”

The tone of your voice is odd and it makes Levi’s throat seize up for a moment while you hesitate. He swallows deliberately.

“And?”

Your next words are more confident, like you have really been thinking a lot, your voice not sleepy in the slightest. It’s matter-of-fact and soft and lovely. 

“And you make me feel really safe. Just, like, all the time. And I’m glad I met you. You make me feel, um...,” a small sniffle, “You make me feel held.”

Levi tightens his arm around you and swallows again. It feels like he’s balancing on the head of a pin, and a thousand angels are swirling around him, and it’s taking all he has not to get pushed off.

“Well, I am holding you.”

“Psssssht,” you wriggle slightly back so you can look at his face. You look simultaneously exasperated and vulnerable in the shadows of your bedroom. “You know what I mean.”

“What if I don’t?”

“Well, I guess...” 

You pause to think for a moment, eyes flicking away from Levi’s face for a split second. Then, they’re back on his and he can feel the vulnerable honesty already spilling from you. 

“I’ve never really, um, gotten a lot of physical affection? From people in my life? And, uh, it’s not just that, it’s that you’re so... so— so familiar, and not just because I know you, godimnotmakingalickofsense, but because it feels like I’ve always known you?” It’s said like a question, like you want to know if he feels the same. “And you just make me feel held.”

You pause on a shaky inhale of breath, then cover your face with your hands and roll onto your back away from him. 

“God, I’m sorry, that doesn’t make any sense at all, I’ll just—“

“Stop,” Levi cuts you off, pushing up to lean over you and grasp your wrists in one hand and cover your mouth with the other, a mirror of the pair of you in the kitchen weeks earlier. “It makes sense. I get it.”

Your doe eyes stare up at him just like they did then and he selfishly indulges in an extra second of staring back before he releases you and slides back to rest on an elbow. Your hands stay demurely tucked by your chest where he put them and your tongue flicks out to lick at your lips as your eyes follow him. 

“Really?”

“Yeah. I get it.”

“Okay. Good.”

Suddenly, Levi doesn’t feel like going to bed. He feels like running for miles or painting until his hands ache or hitting something, anything to distract him from doing something incredibly stupid right now. The mattress sinks as he sits up and spins his legs out of bed, muttering something about tea and not tired yet, and he almost doesn’t catch the sensation of you sitting up behind him. 

He turns halfway back to tell you to go back to sleep, but your fingers catch his chin and he’s abruptly out of breath.

The curve of your bottom lip is perfectly, exactly the way he sketched it in the semi-dark. It’s slightly chapped.

When you kiss him, soft and certain, he topples off the pinhead and back into his body just in time to do something incredibly stupid and kiss you back.

—

(read part 7 here)

#levi ackerman x reader #levi x reader #levi x fem!reader #aot fanfic #attack on titan fanfic #snk fanfic #shingeki no kiyojin fanfic #female!reader #levi ackerman #fluff #swearing #painter's hands and guatemalan coffee #valkyrie writes

[princessmariaphiliper]

THE SLEEPOVER FIC | Part 9 The Fluff

Summary: You and James have put yourselves into trouble, but you think maybe it’s hotter that way.

Notes: James Acaster, 

Pairing: James Acaster x Reader 

Genre: Fluff, , Slow Burn fic

Words: 1,472

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9

In the evening there came a knock at your door. Four gentle raps and you recognised the tune. Ed. He stepped inside your apartment, and you graced him with confusion.

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, am I okay to come in?”

The two of you stood in your hallway, plagued in an awkward silence. The corner of his mouth flicking up in amusement. You felt nervous, as though he somehow miraculously knew about the things you’d done the night before with James.

James was (you presumed) back at his own place after having gone to work with Ed. He’d agreed with you when you opened the suggestion of keeping things on the low in relation to Ed knowing about your casual dating. Still somewhere you didn’t know entirely if you could trust James yet. And so Ed being here moved you into a panic.

“Are you okay?” Ed said inquisitively as he walked into your living room, brows furrowed, fronting his entertainment by your nervous disposition. 

“Yeah yeah. I just wasn't expecting you at all.”

“Oh sorry are you expecting someone?”

“No its fine, place is just a bit of a mess that's all”

You looked around your apartment. Having just returned home there still sat yours and James’s  glasses from the night before, as well as your discarded underwear beside the sofa. You hurried over to them, while Ed lingered beside the television.

“Wild Sunday night?” He teased.

You blushed, nodding. Worrying your bottom lip between your teeth, although stopping as soon as you began from the jolt of pain it caused you. Their sensitivity and tiredness still lingered from James’s rough treatment.

He’d walked you all the way to your studio building this morning. Even offering to bring you some lunch later on as you hadn’t had a chance to prepare anything last night. You declined thankfully, saying you didn’t mind the opportunity to visit a cafe close to work as Olive kept raving about their lunchtime menu. He left you with a polite smile, by asking when he could see you again.

“I didn’t know you were seeing anyone y/n”

“Um yeah. Just sort of happened”

“Ah. I see” Ed moved closer to the now tidied up couch area, gesturing with his hands. “Is there anywhere I shouldn't sit?”

Images of you and James presenting themselves in the forefront of your mind unclothed and in bliss covering the sofa. You paused for a moment to consider where the purest area was. Your stomach doing flips upon realisation that on every cushion you had (unforgettably) fucked his best mate. Pointing to the left you figured was safest. Cunnilingus didn’t seem too bad compared to cowgirl.

“There.” you suggested and Ed sat down.

“Oh I invited James by the way. He’s not got much on since Sarah’s out of town so I figured we could keep him company. Hope that's alright.”

Your bloodflow stopped, unsure of whether or not you could handle the pressure of being around the two of them together. Another knock came at the door, James entering in a panic.

“Y/n I’m sorry I-” He spoke hurriedly before cutting himself off upon noticing Ed already plopped on the couch. His eyes went a little wide before he composed himself. You could see him picturing the two of you in his own mind for a hot minute.

You stood dumbly with your underwear and wine glasses in hand. “Come on in James, don’t be shy.”

“Sorry I” He came up with an excuse for his hurried entrance. “I thought I was late?”

He of course didn’t think he was late. The underlying truth in actuality was that he’d ran to your apartment in an attempt to arrive before Ed and explain away the coincidence.

“No you’re alright, I just got here mate.”

“Ah, right then.”

A numb silence ensued and you took the opportunity to regain some dignity and toss your pants into your bedroom. James watched you nervously, he was still dressed in the cl0othes you’d given him this morning. It was starting to feel as though he lived there.

“Shall I order takeaway?” Ed opened into the flat. And as James made his way over to the sofa he gave him a polite nod - stating “I wouldn’t sit there if I were you.”

However - James ignored his remark sitting comfortably, one arm on the rest. Ed pulled his phone out as you disposed of the glasses in your kitchen sink.

“Sorry Y/n, you’re not busy are you I should have called ahead mate.”

“No no, I’m free its okay!” You insisted, trying to haul yourself through the awkward air.

James was staring at you. His quietness giving you a hint of anxiety. He looked devilish sitting in that spot so comfortably, as though he was non the wiser to the things that’d happened on it last night. Catching you meet his eye he flashed you a knowing smile as you took a seat across the coffee table. He seemed to be enjoying this, as though it was a game only the two of you knew about.

“Nice to see you again Y/n,” The smug bastard nodded at you. You knew he was doing this to slip you up.

“You too,” Two could play at that game. “How’ve you been?”

“Oh just living life.”

“Do anything special at the weekend?”

His cockiness sank from his facial expression. The corner of your mouth twitching with amusement as he scrambled for words. Ed chipped in when he didn’t respond right away. “James?”

“Er yeah. Just trying to think.”

“Don’t strain yourself Jesus.”

“Haha. No, just the usual.”

“Right,” Ed questioned, “Should we get a takeaway? My treat?”

Your mouth watered at the thought. You couldn’t care less if it was a Monday, you’d had a stressful week already.

“God yes.” You moaned, causing James to look at the floor. Crossing one leg over the other. “Wagamama?”

“I’m not bothered either way.”

“I’m fine with Wagas”

 Time passed of you ordering food and casual chats between the three of you. You and James occasionally chatting to each other for too long before catching yourself out. Ed didn’t seem to mind all that much as he kept checking how close your order was to arrival the moment that you’d placed it.

It was about 45 mins later when Ed received a phone call from the rider, being unable to locate your flat he was making his way out to door to find him. You and James finally alone in the kitchen, preparing bowls for the three of you.

“Y/n,” He said, wrapping his arms around your waist, “I swear Ed suggested this I would never just invite myself back I was trying to get here before him, but my phone was dead. God I’m sorry.”

You turned to him, holding back a smile from how flustered he was.

“Its alright, Ed already said he’d invited you before you arrived. Plus,” You started, “I guess I like spending time with you.”

“You guess?”

“Hmm,”

“That’s not what you said last night.” He responded sarcastically, encouraging you to playfully tap his chest.

“Shut up,” You laughed, a gentle smile forming on your mouth. You were beginning to get more comfortable in the solitude of his company. Something you hadn’t felt yourself doing in years. It felt easy now the air had been cleared between the two of you. You just wanted Sarah to come back so he could finish things properly, then you wouldn’t have to worry about Ed. “How was your day?”

“I’ve not sopped thinking about you.”

“Quite the romancer aren’t you?”

“What can I say. Born this way, Lady Gaga behbeh.”

You looked into his playful eyes. A warmness overcoming you, you thought maybe you might allow yourself to fall in love this time. You deserved it after so long. You arched your heels away from the floor, leaning up to give him a gentle kiss on the cheek. You could not resist it. A shy smile grew on his face, and you swore you could see a faint tinge of pink forming on his ears.

The two of you heard the door open, quickly pulling away from one another in an unnatural manner. Hurriedly making yourself busy with cutlery and bowls.

“Found the feast!” Ed’s voice called out from the corridor, as James lent over to whisper in you ear.

“I like you” with a stupid, cavity inducing grin.

“I like you too James” 

HI HI! Long time no see lads. Bit of a shorter chapter today as I’ve been in a little bit of a writing slump with this fic. Trying to plan the direction I want to take it in, Hopefully now I’ll be a bit more on track with updates as I’m aiming for for quality over quantity moving forwards. Thank you for your patience, support and love! - Lu xoxo

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#james acaster imagines #james acaster x reader #james acaster fanfic

[matryosika]

shoot me, chapter III

pairing — changbin x reader

rating — 18+

genre of the overall series — smut, angst, fluff if you squint

prologue chapter I chapter II chapter III

word count for this chapter — 3.7 k

warnings — suggestive, slight jisung x reader, mentions of alcohol, possessive and jealous changbin, choking and sexual tension.

note — i have been pretty ia lately because i'm full of school work to do. my semester is coming to an end, so i must turn in final projects and take my final tests too. i'm normally much active than i have been on this account, i promise to get back to you as soon as school ends for me. this chapter has just sexual tension but not smut smut and it's shorter than the rest but i needed to divide the chapter because it became way too long. smut promised for next one that i will be uploading this weekend (hopefully!)

taglist: @cozyblues @ahgasearmyfan @binnie-m00n

*

[12:17 a.m. Changbin]

i don't think we should to that again

it was a mistake

you looked at your phone at a extreme state of confusion. he had left your place minutes ago and, after an amazing session of oral sex, a lovely dinner and a extremely bearable (maybe even good) late-night talk, the walk to his car was all it took for him to develop a guilt complex?

[12:17 a.m. Changbin]

i just needed to vent but honestly, getting with you can really damage my future and that's not something i'm willing to jeopardize for sex.

you read his messages over and over again. it was the "i just needed to vent" that got backlash from you... did he really just came to your place only to ease his sexual frustrations?

you were still siting in the living room, hugging your knees to your chest. you hadn't lose self control once but twice, and not to mention it was with a man whose only purpose all along was to use you to feel better about himself.

"you really touched bottom this time" you whispered to yourself, feeling the need to take a second shower in order to rinse away all the traces from his touches and kisses on your skin.

maybe it wasn't really the guilt that bothered you. maybe it was the fact that, tonight, was probably the best night you've ever had for a while. he took well care of you, after finishing he cleaned you up and carried you to your room so you could take a shower and change your clothes.

he patiently waited for you while sitting at the edge of your bed and, when you were done showering, some delicious food he ordered was already expecting both of you at the dinning room of the house. during dinner, you told him a little bit about your life in japan and shared some childhood memories with him.

things were good, maybe too good for your own liking, but it only took a couple of minutes for changbin to remind you who he truly was.

not only that, but you also wouldn't admit the fact that you had a great time with him.

*

you spent the rest of the week calmly, having to hang out with changbin more times than you actually wanted to. he would often act like a gentleman in front of his parents and arthur, trying to engage in coversations with you often, asking you about your major and your adolescence in japan. you thought that he was just doing that in an attempt to hide the awkwardness of the air every time you had to spend time with him at arthur's company, but that didn't completely eased the fact that you felt your blood boil every time you had to be near him.

*

"you are coming, right?" ryujin cried from the other side of the phone "you told me you wanted to come!"

fuck, chan's party was this weekend.

"uhhhh" you mumbled "ryujin i don't feel good"

"y/n!" she screamed "is it because of changbin? baby? i have known you since pre-school, are you really feeling bad over a man you met barely 2 weeks ago?"

ryujin was right. you hated men, you truly did. and you were too proud about the fact that you had never cried over one, let alone have your heart broken by any of them. and it wasn't changbin you were sad about but the fact that he used you, you let him and then tried to act like nothing ever happened between both of you, which was even more humilliating. it always seemed like you had everything controlled but this time he was the one who got the last word and that was something you just couldn't accept.

"besides" ryujin added without leaving time for you to talk "i don't even think he is coming, chan said that he invited more people outside his friend group because some of them were not going to make it tonight, maybe he is one of them"

"maybe" you said "but i'm not willing to take a risk on that, ryujin"

you couldn't see her, but you could clearly picture how she was pouting at that exact moment. "y/n, you will eventually go back to japan and we will not be able to hang out anymore. is that what you want? do you want to reject your best friend on a saturday night? plus! the last time i took you to itaewon you had a great time!"

"speak for yourself ryujin" you mutered

"PLEASE" she screamed, making you squirm in your place "i promise that i will be by your side the whole time, i won't get distracted by the gorgeous, precious, well-built, amazing...."

"alright" you interrupted her "i know you are lying but i want to believe you for once"

she did a little scream of victory on the other side of the line and proceeded to set an hour to pick you up, almost against your will.

*

"what's the special occasion?" you asked ryujin as she went through all your clothes that were now laying around your bedroom floor, trying to find the perfect outfit for chan's party because you were dressed too casual, apparently.

"today it's the birthday of one of his closest friends" she said, almost in a hurry "and we are now running late because of your choice of clothes"

"i didn't knew there was a dresscode" you said, sitting at the edge of your bed.

"oh no, there isn't" she responded, now lurking around your suitcase and bags "but you need to let know changbin what he is missing out"

you rolled your eyes and grunted, of course. ryujin was that type of friend who would hype you up while you wear a killer outfit just to piss off a man.

"FINALLY" she screamed, finding the black dress that you stole from changbin at coex "i knew you had something around"

with hesitant eyes you looked at her handing you the dress, not sure if this easy outfit, like changbin said, would fit the occasion. "go on, it's almost 9 p.m."

*

by the bar incident you learned that chan, changbin and the whole friend group were a bunch of privileged men, but you didn't quite understand how privileged they were until you found yourself outside chan's house. the architecture looked excentric but expensive, at the same time. it was located in a pretty nice neighbourhood and was specially afar from the rest of the houses as if the most important value around was privacy.

you looked at ryujin and she seemed nervous. understandable. she came from a decent household but this right here just looked like the mansion of a western celebrity.

"are you alright?" you asked her, closing the door of her car before walking towards the stairs that lead you to the front door.

"this is the first time i'll get to meet chan's friends" she responded, making a grimace as she retracted "well, the second time, but i can barely remember the night at the bar"

"right"

right before she could continue talking, the front door opened and chan greeted you both. "ladies"

you bowed down to chan and ryujin immediately jumped into his arms, receiving a kiss in her cheek by the man himself "could you not?" you joked, watching chan's face turning bright red by the unexpected and euphoric physical contact.

"i missed him!" ryujin defended herself, locking her arms behind his neck.

"come in, y/n" he said, opening the door wider so you and ryujin could come in.

"who's the birthday boy?" you asked, your eyes scanning the insides of the house looking for any sign of changbin.

"it's jeongin's birthday" he said, proudly smiling like the father of an 8-year-old son "he's right there, at the couch. maybe you recall him from the bar"

you saw his face and immediatly remembered him. "yeah, the guy who just couldn't stop laughing"

"that's the one" chan said, standing right besides ryujin "let's go, let me introduce you to them"

*

the next hour was spent peacefully and you were almost thankful that ryujin begged you to come. jeongin, the birthday boy, was already drunk by 10:00 p.m. and kept making bad jokes that cracked everyone up. ryujin left with chan to god-knows-where and you were stucked with jisung and hyunjin at the living room, drinking ocasionally and having a good time.

"i remember you from the bar" jisung mumbled, getting closer to your ear as the music was already too loud. "i wanted to chat with you, but you disappeared quickly"

his breath smelled like cherries and alcohol as he was too close to you, but you couldn't complain. it was almost intoxicating in the best way possible.

"yeah i was not having a good time"

he smiled proudly "i'm sure i could have made it better"

a sarcastic chuckled escaped your lips as he placed a hand on his chest "you don't believe me?"

"i don't believe any man for that matter" you replied almost in a flirty way, not that you wanted to tho but the alcohol was already making you feel a tad extroverted.

"but i'm not any man" jisung whispered on your ear, making you feel goosebumps over the entirety of your body. before you could even say something back, he grabbed you by the hand and took you outside of the living room and into the patio, where a lot of people were gathered drinking and dancing.

"oh, i'm not good at dancing" you tried to escape, jisung holding you by one of your hands.

"you don't have to be good at dancing to enjoy it" he pouted, still convincing you to join him at the improvised dance floor that people made right at the center of the courtyard "c'mon y/n"

you were not too fond of dancing, but the music that was playing and jisung's insistence made you accept the offer. with small jumps of excitement he drove you to the crowd of people and started to move around you like a fool, inspiring you confidence to losen up a bit.

"i'm not used to this" you admit, moving your body to the sound of "criminal" by taemin, one of your favorite songs ever.

"there's always a first time for everything" he mumbled, his face dangerously close to yours "here"

his hands traveled to your waist and he held you closer to his body, feeling his soft and warm sking against the naked parts of your. "just let your body move with the music, it's not hard"

jisung's presence was extremely intoxicated and captivating, but not enough to keep you from notice changbin entering to courtyard.

and he wasn't alone.

your whole body tensed and you could feel how jisung stepped back a little bit. "did i do something wrong?"

you parted your gaze from changbin as soon as he saw your body pressed against him, and you gave a faint smile to jisung.

"no, i just felt shy for a moment"

he gave you a wide smile and continue to hold you even closer, your hips moving involuntary against his pelvic area and his eyes firmly fixed into you. "god, you are so precious"

"am i?" you asked, tilting your head to the side while dancing.

you could feel changbin's gazed nailed into your body and that was making you do stupid things. you wanted to make him feel jealous, for some reason, but using a man you just met wasn't something that would fit in your principles.

"mhm" he hummed, the movements of both of you getting slower as the song progressed. jisung's lips brushed softly against yours pratically begging for a kiss, but you knew that it was way too early for that.

you turned around on your place, your back now pressed to his chest, as you continued to dance against his body. his hands were glued to your waist and ocasionally would visit your hips, moving at the same rythm as you did. a different song was playing right now, but you didn't even noticed as your mind was flooded with thoughts. who was changbin with? was she his girlfriend? was he still there watching you? were you dancing with jisung just to piss him off? and most importantly, why did you feel the need to make him jealous in the first place?

before the trail of thoughts continued on your head, jisung's hand traveled from the tip of your fingers to your left shoulder, his fine digits dancing around your naked clavicles. "did i tell you that this dress looks amazing on you?"

his voice, the trace of his fingers and his scent made you act completely dumb around him, it was almost painful to watch. with a swift movement, you were now facing him again and kept on moving slowly. "i don't think so"

"well" he said, leaning one more time to leave a faint kiss on your lips "you look amazing on that dress"

and without expecting an answer from you, he kissed you.

his lips tasted exactly the same as his scent. the mixture of cherries, strawberries and alcohol intoxicated your five senses, making you unable to think about what you were doing. the kiss was everything except rushed, as if he was taking his time to taste every single inch of your lips and tongue. his hands were resting on your waist and lower back and the song that was now playing just fit the whole mood the both of you created, right until...

"do you mind?" a man's voice asked while you felt a grip on your forearm.

"give me a break man" jisung said, interrupting the kiss. it was no other than changbin, standing right in the middle of you and jisung.

"she is drunk" changbin said, almost in a threatening tone.

"i am not" you responded, trying to get out of changbin's grip.

"we are in the middle of something here" jisung insisted, trying to get between you and the grip changbin had on your arm.

"i'm not in the mood for a chat, han" his voice turned ten times deeper and his body language reminded you of that night at itaewon "i'm taking her home because he drank too much"

"let go off of me"

but he did not let go of you and continued dragging you across the whole courtyard and into the living room. "aren't you supposed to be with your girlfriend?"

you started to curse him openly, but he wouldn't slow down his pace. he took you out of the house and into his car without even saying a word.

"you are acting as if you were my owner" you grunted, looking for your phone inside of your purse "you just love to order me around, don't you?"

"that didn't seem to upset you at the bar and your house" he scoffed, his voice going completely cold as ice.

"you bringing that topic now is just miserable" you laughed as he started the car "i was about to enjoy a good night of fucking, something i never got to do with you because you are a coward"

changbin's jaw tensed up and you could feel how the car started to go faster.

the adrenaline of changbin's jealousy, the alcohol, jisung's taste and the speed of the car were making you feel particularly bold tonight, something you knew you would regret the morning after.

"why do you tense up?" you asked, teasing him "i know you wanted to fuck me so bad but still decided to not jeopardize your future for a night of sex"

you were not completely sure, but it was kind of obvious that changbin wasn't driving to your house. you tried to catch a glimpse of the street names as if that was going to be helpful to a foreigner, but it was too dark outside.

"you are not going to talk now?" you asked him, taking off your high-heels as your whole body rested on the car seat. "you were so bold a few minutes ago, trying to act like a fucking man intimidating jisung at chan's house. two nights of oral sex and i have that much of a grip on you, changbin?"

he wouldn't respond, and that only made your blood boil even more.

"you are so fucking pathetic" you muttered, looking directly at him as his gaze was completely fixed on the road.

the car took a sudden turn and parked right in front of a complex of apartments. without hesitation, he got out and opened the door for you, carrying you into his shoulder inside the elevator of the lobby.

the scene was pretty much awkward as you faced yourself into the elevator mirror. your hair was completely messed up and your lipstick was a bit smudged but other than that, you looked completely sober. not only that, but he knew that you weren't drunk. he just made that excuse.

the doors of the elevators opened on the 12th floor and you were glad that no one was waiting for it outside, otherwise they would've seen your ass on changbin's shoulder.

"you know i'm not drunk, right?" you said, still resting on his shoulders while he took his keys from the pocket of his black pants

"just shut the fuck up for a moment" he said, carrying you and leaving you standing inside of his apartment as he turned all the lights inside on.

"i knew your behavior as a gentleman was a fucking act and you only did that in front of your parents and arthur"

"you are so annoying" changbin whispered as he walked towards the black leather couch in the middle of the living room of his apartment. you followed him and walked right behind him.

"i don't have anything to do here, changbin" you mumbled, his back turned against you. you wanted to tease him, you needed to. for an unknown reason, you felt the sudden urge to make him mad, to make him explode. you needed things to escalate quickly so he would give you another reason for you to hate him even more "i can't believe i should be fucking with jisung right now but instead i'm-"

before you could finish that sentence, you felt changbin's grip on both sides of your neck "go on, keep on talking"

the lack of oxygen, the sudden movement of changbin against your body and his gaze flooded with anger made your legs tremeble "keep on fucking talking"

you could barely swallow by how hard his right hand was grasping onto your neck "look at you" you whispered with broken words, smirking as your eyes unconciously closed because of the pleasure "are you jealous, changbin?"

"why don't you answer the question, y/n?" he asked, his hold on your neck becoming softer as his lips approached your right ear "how did you felt when you saw me with that girl earlier today?"

an ironic laugh left your lips, trying to shield yourself from the obvious thing. "i don't know what game you are playing, changbin, but i didn't felt shit"

"really?" he hummed, his raspy voice near your ear made you squeeze your thighs together unconciously, and even though his hand was merely just resting on your neck, the arousal you felt from his grip was still there. "i know you saw me with her, and i could tell how that made you dance for jisung more... enthusiastically"

"you are wrong" you replied, pushing him slightly away "and pathetic, getting jealous when you were the one who cutted things off since the beginning"

"he is an asshole" changbin said with a mocking and sarcastic tone, his fingers tracing the naked skin of your arms as he licked his lips "and i must protect you, like arthur said. isn't that right?"

"he is a good kisser" you answered "i bet he fucks better than you too, not that i would know though because i never got to fuck with you"

changbin's eyes drifted from your skin to your eyes in a matter of miliseconds and for the first time in the evening you regretted saying something. "you are just begging for me to fuck you, aren't you?"

"don't get confused" you spitted "i don't want to have anything to do with you"

his hand traveled slowly to the end of your dress, lifting it up and reaching for your, now soaking, panties. his digits traced your slit and you swallowed hard in anticipation for whatever humiliating thing he was about to say. "are you sure?"

he removed his fingers from your core and were now glistening thanks to the light coming from the window of his apartment. "look at me and tell me that you don't want me to fuck you"

"look at me and tell me that you didn't felt jealous when you saw me with jisung" yo fired back, a faint smirk appearing on his face.

"i did" he admitted "i can't even begin to explain how mad i felt at the sight of your precious body pressing against his. all i wanted to do at that exact moment was to fuck you right in front of everybody, including him"

his hands toured to your back, unzipping the dress you were wearing as he looked directly into your eyes trying to decode if you actually wanted this or not.

"i know what i said last week" changbin mumbled, his fingers helping you to drag the straps on your dress all the way to your wrists "but your existence is fucking me up"

your heart started to beat even faster, your breath accelerated "and it wasn't until i saw you with someone else where i realized that i needed to make you completely mine, even just once"

you soon found yourself in your underwear right in front of him, his eyes looking at you up and down several times making you feel intimidated. you had two options: loose your self-control for the third time and do something that you truly wanted to, or leave his apartment feeling proud.

but you already made that choice when you didn't fought back enough to stop him from driving you to his place.

"please ruin me" you whispered, your soul immersed in arousal, guilt and regret.

#stray kids x reader #stray kids smut #skz smut #skz x reader #skz angst #stray kids angst #changbin smut #changbin angst #changbin x reader #stray kids oneshots #stray kids imagines #skz imagines #skz oneshots

[historicfailure]

Weekly late Heads-Up

Coming up:

The long promised Madara Smut fic! I’m really happy with that one and can only hope you guys will also like it! :D As always, you can expect it this Saturday :D

The week after that, the 18th chapter of FCC can be expected ;D I’m currently working on it, but trying my best to keep my usual two-week rhythm up! We’re nearing the ending of the fic, after all ;D

Working On:

the 18th chapter of FCC ^^ The release party is something I envisioned for so long, you have no idea. It was probably one of the first scenes I had in mind when I started this fic, so to finally being able to actually write it is... definitely a strange experience xD

I’m also working on the next fic (work title: “Love Notes”), which will be on the shorter side... I hope. You know how quickly things can escale with me ^^’‘

I’m also sporadically working on the Attorney!Madara fic, but only very sporadically. It’s kind of on the backburner for now.

I also have to confess: there will probably a slight pause between the end of FCC and the next fic. A) I want to have some chapters already finished before I start posting them, B) I need a little break to not stop midway again and C) ... well, my RL picks up a lot. I’m in the middle of moving into a new flat, I will probably be hired by my current employer fully, as in, not “learn” anymore, but work like a real adult (bleurgh). I have no idea what that means for this, for my blog here and for my writing in general. I guess I have to see how my schedule will change. But I will keep you guys updated.

Some more personal stuff below the cut ^^’‘

Lately I’ve been a bit disheartened that there have been little to no interactions on Tumblr. Shoutout to the people who still tag me in ask games/chains, to the people who comment and talk in the tags of reblogs etc, I’m so sorry that I don’t react much at the moment, and I appreciate you more than you believe. Apart from that I just feel that interaction has dropped since last year, which is probably due to finishing Communication is Key, which was infinitely more popular than FCC.

Also, one-shots are a more liked format on Tumblr which definitely isn’t my strong suit at all xD Plus, maybe I seem a bit unapproachable? I think? Plus, I always take a long time to answer asks, which also doesn’t help. I don’t know, honestly. I understand those reasons too, logically. Yet, a small part of me is pretty envious of other writers I see on my timeline who seemingly get lots and lots of asks every day.

This is not meant as a guilt trip of any kind. I’m not here for that. I just wanted to be honest for once and not keep everything in (which I definitely tend to do in RL) and that’s what the anonymity of the internet is for, right? Kind of. This is more of a... more personal update, my view on my current state as a person, and my current feelings. If something happens to this blog, you guys will be the first one to know. This is just me stating some of my feelings, nothing else. Maybe things will change in a few weeks again and I will overcome that stupid slump i’m in right now. Right now, the schedule above is king, and I will definitely at least finish FCC ^^

Sorry for the little rant! Hopefully you can forgive me for going off the rails for a bit there ^^’‘ The most important parts are that soon, I will be pretty busy RL, I’m a bit bummed out but still motivated, and I will definitely finish FCC ^^ Thank you all for reading (to the people who made it that far). Stay safe and sound you all, and see you all this Saturday :D

#weekly #weekly heads-up #weekly newsletter #newsletter #heads up #historicfailure #freakypseudwriter

[eelistolvanen]

Bruises that you left behind - Travis Konecny Pt.4

A/N: This chapter is a bit shorter and it’s probably more of a filler. After this the next chapter (Pt. 5) is probably going to be the last one(Hopefully longer than this one).  Thanks to everyone who liked, reblogged or commented! Let me know if you like it! Happy reading <3

Words: 2.9k 

Warnings: Angst, more heartbreak, mentions of a panic attack, no proofread (as usual)

Part 1    Part 2     Part 3  

------------------------------------------------

Nobody else on the team knew anything more about your suspicion. They were just as clueless as you were about what exactly happened.

Christmas was coming around and you were busy with work most days. You were still hanging out with some of the boys and the girls on the team, just not as frequent. And even though the situation with Travis still wasn’t really resolved you were trying to avoid him. Not that he was looking for you or reach out for you, but you made sure that there wasn’t a chance of an unexpected run in like there had been at Halloween.

You mostly hung out with Kevin. Nolan was hanging out with Kelsey most days and as much as you loved both of them, you tried to stay away from third wheeling a couple for now. And Kev was fun to hang out. He never pressed the Travis issue and was always able to get your head away from work.

And it was just before Christmas when Maddie broke the happy news to you. Provy proposed to her and you needed to be one of the first to know. At least that’s what she was telling you when she stormed your apartment that day. You were happy for her, they were a great couple but you couldn’t help the heavy heart you got when she mentioned what her dream wedding looked like. You smiled through her showing you her wedding pinterest and telling you about the place she wanted to get married at. That the wedding would be perfect.

You felt a sab in your heart. Your wedding was perfect, everything had been picture perfect. Besides that one thing. That ruined everything.

 He slowly shook his head. “He’s not coming, Y/N.”

At first you couldn’t believe it. You couldn’t really understand, you didn’t want to understand because understanding would also mean that you in a way accepted it. And you didn’t.

“No, Nolan. This can’t be right. Maybe… maybe you misunderstood him. I.. I-“ There wasn’t anything he could say that would make this hurt less and he needed to tell you the truth. He couldn’t sugarcoat this. No matter how many times Nolan had protected you before, tried to keep you out of harms, this time he wouldn’t be able to do so anymore. He couldn’t protect you from harm. From heartbreak.

“He called the wedding off, Y/N. I’m so sorry-“ You couldn’t listen to him and you didn’t want to. You didn’t want to hear him apologize for something he didn’t do.

“I have to talk to him, Nolan. Where is he?” Nolan stayed silent and you could already guess his answer but you weren’t just heartbroken anymore. You were angry.

“WHERE IS HE?” You barely raised your voice and Nolan visibly flinched at your change in tone.

“He already left.”  You were in denial and angry so you were only half registering what Nolan said. And as much as Nolan tried to convince you that he’d already left and that it was stupid to run all the way to the room where he was supposed to get dress for his own wedding, you weren’t listening.

You swung the door to his room open, by now halfway believing Nolan that he had left and expecting an empty room, but you were met with Travis’ silhouette. At least you mistook it for his silhouette for a second. His brother had enough similarity to Travis to fool you at first glance.

Then Chase turned around and the expression on his face would have broken you if your heart hadn’t already been shattered minutes prior.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. He’s gone.” He looked at you the same way Nolan had. Full of pity, sorrowful, hurt.

You only spotted the letter he had in his hand once he stepped closer to you.

“He asked me to give you this.” He handed you the letter but before he could blink you had thrown it across the room. “Why didn’t you stop him Chase!” You were hammering your fists onto his chest. You knew it wasn’t his fault but your anger had taken over, he slowly caught your wrists while your punches lost force. “I tried Y/N, believe me I tried.”

You didn’t wanna hear it, you ripped your wrists from his grasp and made your way out the door. Nolan’s “Where are you doing?” were left unanswered.

On your way out you ran into Maddie. And apparently everyone already knew that the wedding was called off. You brushed off her inquiries about your well being and quickly appointed her to your personal chauffeur. You could sense that she wanted to fight this but by now you had turned into full on bridezilla and she knew better than to get in your way.

She had barely stopped the car in front of yours and Travis’ shared house before you jumped out and made your way up the stairs. And for the next couple minutes you ran around your house like a mad person, still in your gown and everything while trying to process what had happened.

When you came to a standstill Maddie was already standing in the doorway.

“Y/N…” Her tone was cautious but laced with pain. She hated to see you this broken and she hated Travis for doing this to you.

“He’s gone..” You said it more to yourself than to her but it was still loud enough for her to hear it.  

“What..-“ Maddie barely got a word out. She knew Travis left the wedding but this felt different. It felt worse.

“His suitcase for our honeymoon is gone.” You gestured towards an area in the entryway. “His favourite snapbacks…” You moved towards an empty shelf. “His fishing rods… All the dog leashes… His grandmother’s picture on the nightstand… Everything that’s important to him… It’s all gone..”

This was it. This was your breaking point, for the first time that day you started to cry. “He’s gone, Maddie.” You sobbed under tears while she rushed to you to you. You felt yourself starting to hyperventilate, you were panicking.

“Ahrgh,.. get me… out.. get me out of this.” You were trying to rip your dress from your body but the lacing on the back kept it in place.

“Hey, hey, hey, Y/N. Breath Y/N, breath. I’m getting you out of this.”

It felt like forever till she had finally cut all the lacing open and shed you from your wedding dress. Your entire body was shaking as you fell onto your knees and completely broke down.

“It’s over, Maddie. It’s over.”

-----------------------------------

You had holed yourself up in your house for the next days. You didn’t want to see anyone right now. You knew they meant well, you just couldn’t take it. The only people you let in were Nolan for his daily check ups, Maddie and your sister. The day before Maddie had told you that she needed to get back home and that she would see you in Philly soon. You knew that you wouldn’t but she didn’t had to know that now. You weren’t in the mood to explain that your life in Philly was over. So you just nodded in agreement and said your goodbyes to her. This morning your sister had dropped to tell you that she had to fly back home. But not before telling you that you should consider coming home for a while as well. Your parents home or your sisters were always open for you. You tried to fight her, tell her that as long as you stayed here you weren’t giving up, that there was still a chance but deep down you had already contemplated the move back home before she had brought it up.

Now Nolan was sitting on one of the kitchen stools, nervously bouncing his legs. It was driving you nuts. You knew there was something he wasn’t telling you and you also knew that he was aware that you sensed this.

“Spit it out Nolan. What is it?” Your tone was irritated.

He took a deep breath before making eye contact with you.

“Chase got a hold of Travis.” His eyes were searching yours for a reaction before he continued

“He’s in Fiji. And he told Chase to move all his remaining stuff out of your house if you want to stay here. He won’t be back here for a while.”

You knew this was coming, deep down you knew he wouldn’t come back to you. But it still hurt more than you thought it would. It was over.

“Fiji? Please tell me he’s-“ Your voice broke before you could finish the sentence but Nolan knew what you were gonna ask anyway. His slight nod let you know what you wanted to know soon enough.

“Please tell me he’s by himself. That he didn’t take some mistress to our Honeymoon resort..”

Nolan’s eyes went wide. “I don’t know if he’s alone or not… You don’t.. you don’t think he’s cheating on you? Y/N?” He was almost to shocked to form a coherent sentence.

“I don’t know, Nolan…” You felt tired. And numb. Suddenly you felt like Nolan’s presence was crushing you.

“Thanks for stopping by Nolan.” Your tone made it clear that he wasn’t welcomed anymore. It was cold and unfair what you did to Nolan but you wanted to be alone.

It took you a while to realise that he left something on your kitchen island after he left. It dawned on you what it was after you picked it up. The letter you threw across the room that Chase gave you. It had your name on top of it in Travis’ scrawny handwriting.

You turned towards one of the kitchen drawers and started searching through them until you found what you were looking for.

For a moment the thought of burning the entire house down crossed you mind. No, you could probably go to jail for that. The letter, however, went up in flames seconds later.  

That afternoon you cleared everything that fit in your car out of your house. You had made your choice. The life you once had was gone. Travis wasn’t coming back to you. So instead of trying to hang onto a life that was only inflicting you pain you decided to leave it behind. All of it. Travis, the dogs, the house, Nolan, all your friends in Philly. An entire life, really.

By the time Nolan came around the next day for this next check up you were already miles away from your old life. You said goodbye to the last pieces of that life a few weeks later. By now you were able to transfer to a local school near your hometown. You emptied everything that belonged to you out of your and Travis’ shared Philly place.

Quietly, like a ghost, you vanished from your past life until there were no traces of you left anymore.

You tried to share Maddie’s excitement as much as you could. She knew herself that this wasn’t easy for you and was a little more lenient than usual. You also got invited to the Flyers Christmas party but had to decline because you already had something school related that evening. In a way you were relieved that you had an excuse but you were also a bit sad since you loved hanging out with the team.

It was already mid January when you saw Travis again. Strictly by coincidence. It had nothing to do with the team or Nolan or Kevin. You were out shopping but since you were looking for something different than usual, something for your students actually, you found yourself on the other side of town. Not in your wildest dreams did you think you would run into Travis in a parking lot. You probably wouldn’t have even noticed him if he hadn’t called out to you.

“Oh, hey Travis” You were sure he realised how shocked you were to see him, and he kinda looked at you the same way. Like two aliens from the same planet meeting each other on another planet or something. At least that’s how it looked to you.

“How are you Y/N?” His voice was soft, contrary to his appearance.

Was he seriously trying to make small talk with you in parking lot?

“Good. Busy with school and stuff.” You weren’t quite sure what to say, were you just gonna talk like some people who barely knew each other? Or was there more behind his question?

“Ah, yeah, Haysey told be that you’re teaching in Philly again.” You raised your eyebrows, he talked with Kev about you? He seemed to notice your questioning look on your face.

“I ask him about it. I just wanted to know how you’re doing.” Your heart sunk towards your feet at his words. You wished he didn’t care so much, it would be easier if he wasn’t trying so hard to fix this.

“Yeahh… It’s good.” You turned back towards your car, enough small talk.

“Don’t just run away again, Y/N. I’m trying, I am.”

You felt your emotions flare up again. Why couldn’t he just let it be?

“Your not trying hard enough.”

He was stroking through his hair in despair.

“What do you want me to do then?” You stared at him. How many times did you have to tell him again? Why couldn’t he answer the one question you wanted to know.

“I want you to tell me the real reason! What was in that letter Travis?”

“ I didn’t mean to hurt you, Y/N.” You scoffed, of course he would deflect again. He always did. “Oh really? What did you think would happen when you left me at the altar then? That I would be happy? Why Travis, why? I just don’t understand your reason.”

“Why is it so important to you? Why do I have to explain my reasons to you? I fucked up, ok? I made the biggest mistake of my life. I ruined my life. And I’m so sorry, Y/N. If I could turn back time I would do it all differently. In a perfect life I would have married you and we would have kids by now. But I fucked that up. It was all my fault and I’m so so sorry. Isn’t that enough?”

You stared at him for a while. You knew he would wait til you spoke up. You slowly shook your head.

“No, it’s not. I wanna know the real reason. I know there is one.” You tried your hardest to keep your voice steady.

“Why do you wanna know so bad?!” His voice was rising and so was yours as you shouted,

“Because I need to know it to move on!” Travis was visibly taken aback. He looked like someone slapped him in the face. He was left speechless so you continued.

“Since the wedding I’ve been running away from it all. From all the memories, from the pain, from my life, my friends. I thought that running away would ease the pain. I thought I could move on. But deep down all the pain was still there, bottled up deep down. And I realise now that I have to face it and work through it to move on. But I need to make peace with the reason why you left me, I…-”

You didn’t get any further before Travis finally found his voice.

“Move on? You’re… you’re moving on? I thought we could work this out.”

You looked at the sky and let out something between a laugh and a groan.

“There’s nothing to work on, Travis. There is no us, not anymore.”

“But you still love me!” He sounded angry now, his tone throwing you off guard.

“No, I don’t. Not anymore.” That was a lie, but you couldn’t give him any hope. Not when you’d already lost yours.

“That’s a lie, Y/N. I know you and I know when you’re lying.”

“You used to know me, Travis. Not anymore. Things have changed. The pain you put me through changed me.”

Even a complete stranger could detect the absolute agony in your voice when you said that. And Travis knew that you meant it, you wanted to move on.

Defeated he turned away from you, he didn’t want to tell you the reason. Especially not when knowing that it meant that you would move on once he told you. But he had to, he owed that to you. Even if it was the last thing he would ever get to say to you, he owed that to you.

“It’s not any of the reason that you think. There was never anyone else. And I knew that I would never find anyone better than you. But I promised you, I promised I wouldn’t do this to you.”

It took you a moment to understand what he was talking about. What promise he meant. And when you did, suddenly everything seemed to fall apart inside you. A silent sob escaped your lips. A disbelieving, shocked “No..” was all you came up with. This couldn’t be true. He’d turned around now and when you looked at him you could see that silent tears were running down his face. You didn’t remember ever seeing him in so much despair.

“ I promised you, Y/N…”

Part 5

#travis konecny #travis konecny imagine #travis konency fic #travis konecny x reader #philadelphia flyers #nhl fic #nhl imagine #My writing

[thetimemoves]

Writer Meme

I was tagged by @discordantwords and @calaisreno - thank you!

Name: thetimemoves / thetimemoves(WriteOut) on AO3

Fandoms: BBC Sherlock

Where you post: AO3

Most popular multi-chapter: I’ve not yet written one! I’ve got three multi-chapter WIPs, coincidentally all BBC updates of canon stories, so we’ll see how those turn out.

Fic you were most nervous to post: It’s always nerve-wracking, but I’ll say Abditory, which was my first fic. Even though I’d been reading Sherlock fic since 2011, I was super late to the fic-writing party and didn’t join until after S4. I had no idea what to expect. I followed my first fic up with a Sally Donovan-centric fic, Carpe Vinum. It was only my second story and I wasn’t sure how it would be received. Based on hits/kudos, it’s my least popular work, but it found a lovely and receptive audience. I’m quite fond of my Sally and plan on writing more.

How do you choose your titles: They’re usually the first thing about a story to come to me. Bits from songs, poems, and canon stories seem to be the most popular for me so far. I’m pleased with most and wish I could retitle one or two.

Do you outline: Not really, hence my growing list of unfinished multi-chaptered WIPs. I make lots of notes, which are fine for shorter stories, but I’m learning I need more structure for the longer ones. 

Complete: 15! Who would’ve thought? NOT ME. 7 of those are 221b ficlets, which I’ve discovered I love to write.

In progress: Let’s not talk about my 2018 Spook Me fic about the Bogeyman. Okay, fine. Yesterday Upon the Stair (title is tentative, might just be straightforward and call it Bogeyman). John and Sherlock are on a nasty case involving a serial burglar turned possible serial killer. The fic is set in the present day (not sure when in canon, maybe post-S3) as they have their final confrontation with the Bogeyman, but it relies heavily on flashbacks that both set up the case and (hopefully) provide some insight into John’s background and character. I REALLY want to finish this one. I’m quite pleased with what I’ve done so far, but need to take time to fully flesh out the story. 

Ironically, I saw a Tumblr post this week that talks about the proper way to use flashbacks and I’m pretty sure my fic breaks all those rules. Ah well. 

And then there is Of Shags and Squires. A BBC ‘verse update of REIG that I’ve mixed up with the legend of the Buckland Shag, a local legend I stumbled across by accident when doing some area research. The story follows canon loosely, in that John drags a recovering and reluctant Sherlock down to the countryside to relax. As in canon, their relaxing weekend goes sideways when they get caught up in a case, only this time it’s not as straightforward a solution.

Coming but not soon:  A BBC ‘verse updated of 3GAB centered around Sally Donavan (her POV, her story) and a BBC ‘verse update of GLOR that will feature my version of Victor Trevor. Whee!! Sherlock takes a case that opens up his past. That one will be titled The Ghosts of Our Old Lovers. 

Do you accept prompts? Sure, although the only prompts I’ve so far written have been for the Holmestice exchange. I do love writing 221b ficlets and would happily try my hand at any prompts for those. Longer stories, probably not right now.

Upcoming story you are most excited to write: Each one excites me in some way, but I’m really stoked to write Victor Trevor and his mother (not father) Alice Trevor.

Upcoming story you are most excited about: my FTH story by @reveling-in-mayhem! It’s going to be so. so. good. I’m following lots of excellent WIPs, there’s my ever-growing MFL list, and finally all of the upcoming fics I’m seeing in these memes. Yay!! There’s no such thing as too many fics, but there is certainly too little time in which to read them all! 

If you’re reading this, consider yourself tagged. I’d love to know what everyone is working on these days! Fics, vids, art, anything. 

#bbc sherlock #fic recs #my fic #writing meme