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#but yeah i hope those answers are satisfying :)
dariwrites03 · 16 hours
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Fucked up Monday. 2/3
Part 1: https://www.tumblr.com/daribertduck/748615753776955392/fucked-up-monday
A/n: Before you guys kill me; I’m already writing part 3. don’t you worry it’s coming your way. Please comment & repost, it’s giving me much motivation!
Summary: After Ellie kissed you on Patrol, everything was turning weird, you’re full of guilt and other feelings... What happens when your life turns from agonizing to better to so much worse? And why exactly can a few letters change everything?
Warnings: none? I think?
Taglist: @bready101 @lia-winther @liciapeonia @darkerstarsstuff @patricks-fabulous-face ( I tagged some people from my comments, hope that’s alright)
-5700k words
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„And I thought I was weird for feeling uncomfortable at that, you know? They broke up, it's not really his place to say anything like that especially after telling Dina he's over her anyways" You're best friend said, finishing up her explanation of yesterdays event with Dina and Jesse. He found the two of them smoking near a warehouse and from what you made out of Ellie's explanation, he wasn't too happy to see them sitting so close.
You and Ellie were having another movie night, those happen pretty often. ( Every Wednesday, to be exact.) sitting on the old sofa in your living room with you're legs resting on hers. „Well, it's still fresh. Don't think he's jealous of the two of you spending lots of time together but maybe it's just a weird feeling seeing her with someone else, though there's absolutely nothing between you and Dina" you replied, chuckling at the thought of Jesse being all jealous over nothing. You rested your head back against the many sofa pillows, enjoying the comfy half sitting half laying position you're in. „Yeah.. totally" Ellie mumbled, looking down at her hands resting on top of you ankles, shifting uncomfortably. Knowing Ellie probably better than anyone else, you knew right away that something seems off.
„Wait.." you said,  sensing the weird vibe from you're best friend. „There is nothing between you two, right?" you said, lifting you're upper body into a more sitting posture. „Ellie?" you said her name as you're so called friend didn't answer right away. You felt you're heart stink, not really being sure of what's going on exactly. „uhm.. I don't wanna talk about it?" she said, looking at you with an apologetic look, making it sound more like a question than an real steady answer. „Hell no, remember our ‚no lying rule'?" you said. „Cmon we made that rule as we were 15, that's childish." she said while caressing through her hair, suddenly looking all exhausted. „It wasn't childish when I had my first kiss and didn't want to talk about it" You mentioned. Remembering the night you ran about 2 miles to Ellie's house after spending the afternoon with some other kids in the pub, playing some stupid games. After you kissed Sophia as you're truth or dare quest you took of running, straight into the arms of the brown haired girl who couldn't participate that nights event due to a cold. Ellie knew something must've happened and as you really didn't want to talk about it, embarrassed by the fact that everyone could probably tell you never kissed anyone ever before, Ellie set up a rule. *„Let's promise to always be honest, life is too fucked up to screw it up with lies"* you knew she was right and since that night you tried to always be honest to each other.
„Cmon that's totally different!" Ellie defended herself, crossing her arms above her chest. „Jesus, Williams, answer the fucking question and stop being difficult" you said with a light voice, feeling like Ellie was some deer that takes of running as soon as you're tone was slightly off. „I mean, there is nothing between me and Dina.. so" she explained and you could tell that She was satisfied with her answer since her shoulders became less tense. „But you wish there was?" you asked, not able to look at Ellie you decided to give you're hands something to do, grabbing the soda can you had standing infront of you at the table. „I.. yeah, I guess? Okay. Who am I kidding" she said, her hands running over her face. She revealed a slight laugh. „Oh god" she groaned, now fully blushing like a 13 year old teenager. „Yeah, yeah I do like her. Fuck, this is the first time admitting it out loud" she said.
You took a sip from you're soda, the carbonic acid being long gone since you opened the can almost 2 hours ago, giving you a second or two to continue to stay silent. Having the opportunity to ignore the trouble of you're mind right now
The Jealousy building up inside of you made you think like you're going all crazy, fighting against the urge to scream inside a pillow you took that energy elsewhere. „okay, good for you" you said, taking another sip from the drink, hoping to put out the fire building up in you're chest. Ellie looked at you saying „it's not weird, right? Falling for her?" you looked at her again, considering of telling her what you really think. You consider of telling her that's it's not weird, but you don't like it either. No , you hate it. You hate it so much because you want Ellie to fall for you instead of her.
But you didn't say that. Instead you betrayed your 15 year old self by lying to Ellie and yourself. 
It's been three months, 4 days and 2,5 Hours without a word from her. 
 Ever since then , You are entangled in the delicate web of grief for what felt like for two people, where the threads of loss and longing weave intricate patterns within your heart. Two souls, distinct yet equally significant, find their place in the chambers of your being.
Dylan, now resting six feet under, has embarked on a journey beyond the veil. His earthly vessel lies cradled by the soil, while his essence pirouettes among the constellations. The wasteland of the unknown stretches before him—And then there's your best friend, a constellation of memories and shared secrets. But her presence has become elusive, slipping through your fingers like sand. She chooses silence—a withdrawal that echoes louder than any spoken words. And you tried. Oh, how you tried to get her to speak—the silent symphony of longing, the unspoken words that hung in the air like dew-kissed spider silk. Your gaze, a language of its own, whispered secrets that transcended mere sentences. But she? She met your offerings with silence—a void that echoed louder than any spoken syllable. She stopped coming over. The threshold of your space became a chasm, a bridge severed by unspoken truths. The door, once a portal to laughter and whispered confidences, now stood closed. The only ever time you got to see her, to give yourself the inner peace of her being okay, was on the weekly parol meetings. She attended, her presence a fragile thread connecting you both. But she mastered the art of departure—slipping away before your eyes could catch hers. The opposite direction became her refuge, a path untrodden by your footsteps.
Talking wasn't what Ellie needed. You sensed it, that unspoken ache in the air—the need for silence, for space. So you stepped back, honoring the boundaries she drew around her heart. But your longing couldnt be unoticed by you any longer so after three weeks, you started writing to her. Youre desperation spilled over, ink bleeding onto paper.  You became a clandestine messenger, slipping perfumed notes into the small slit of her mailbox. Each letter carried a piece of your soul—a plea, a confession, a desperate whisper.  It lingered on your fingertips, a bridge between worlds. And as you pressed those letters into the darkness, you imagined her fingers brushing against them. Would she feel the urgency? Would she hear your silent screams for her friendship?  Handwritten letters—those delicate vessels of ink and paper—weave memories that transcend mere words. Each stroke of the pen, each carefully crafted sentence, carries a piece of the you in them. The intimacy lies not only in the content but also in the act of creation itself. You decided to write her if shes unable to talk, you wanted to give her the space she needed, you tried to be as understanding as you could. But one unanswered letter turned into two, three, four. You stopped putting them into her mailbox after five. 
Now, you're trying to ignore the pain in your heart every time you wake up. Ellie's childish behavior hasn't stopped you from living your life. Instead, you channel your anger and sleepless nights into your work, making each patrol count. Working alongside Jesse has become a bright spot—a fun experience you eagerly anticipate. It's not the same as those moments outside the gates with Ellie, but it's different in a way that doesn't breed resentment.
You and Jesse share a closeness that predates his separation from Dina. The heartbreak they both faced has left its mark, and you find solace in each other's company. Jesse isn't thrilled about the situation either—the breakup and lingering jealousy still gnaw at him. On that second day of patrol together, he broaches the awkward topic between you and Ellie. "So, you gonna tell me what happened or not?" Jesse's voice cut through the quiet of the abandoned checkpoint. He pulled a sandwich from his backpack, the crinkling of the wrapper echoing in the dim light. The two of you sat there, weary from the day's patrol, the weight of your assigned route still clinging to your bones. Nightfall had descended too swiftly, and the dangers of this post-apocalyptic world made it impossible to venture home safely after dark. You shifted uncomfortably on the hard ground, the rough edges of the old checkpoint digging into your back. The makeshift campsite was a stark reminder of the life you now led—constantly on the move, always vigilant. Jesse's eyes bore into yours, waiting for an answer.
"Don't really know what's there to say, to be honest," you replied, your fingers tracing the edges of the food you'd prepared hours ago. The silence now haning between the two of you wasnt uncomftable,punctuated by the distant howl of a lone infected.  "Maybe explain why we're now patrol partners? I thought you and Ellie made such a good team. Not that I'm complaining, though—we're badass too. Just wondering why you suddenly decided that Ellie wasn't good enough anymore," Jesse's voice cut through the dimly lit space of the makeshift camp. He lay down on the sleeping bag, using his right arm as a makeshift pillow, his gaze fixed on you. The flicker of confusion danced through the forest of your mind as you replayed Jesse's last words.
"What? I didn't decide that," you replied, studying your friend's posture as he took a bite of his cheese sandwich. "I asked Dina what happened earlier today." Jesse mumbled, his mouth still half full. "Ellie told her it was you who decided to change partners. Don't get me wrong—I feel honored to be your new partner in crime. I was just curious about what happened." - ''the fuck?'' You said more to yourself than him. ''Thats so fucked up..'' -"Okay, c'mon, I need the drama. Please explain to me like everything. Consider me one of your gossip girls," Jesse quipped, his unseriousness bringing a smile to your face. You took another bite of your food, savoring the dry bread as you gathered your thoughts. Trusting Jesse, you decided it wasn't a bad idea to share what had transpired between you and Ellie. So, with a deep breath, you began recounting the events of your last patrol with her. Jesse leans in, eyes wide with curiosity. His sandwich forgotten, he hangs on every word as you recount the events of that fateful patrol with Ellie. The tension, the unspoken words, the ache in your chest—it all spills out, painting a vivid picture of the fractured bond between you and the girl who once felt like your world.
"Damn," Jesse mutters, running a hand through his hair. "That's heavy stuff." His gaze lingers on your face, searching for answers. "You think she'll come around?'' You shrug, the weight of uncertainty settling on your shoulders. ''Dont think so, I think she regrets even kissing me. She has dina now, dont think that she'll need me anymore.'' Your gaze drifts down to your wrist, where the matching bracelet still clings—a fragile thread connecting you to Ellie. You wonder if she wears hers. Jesse, now leading forward, nudges your shoulder playfully. "Well, partner," he says, "we'll keep kicking ass out here. Fuck them both".
After that night, you felt like Jesse and you were attached at the hip. Somehow, you both helped each other navigate the jagged terrain of heartbreak, spending time together and letting the hours slip away. Being friends with Jesse had its perks. He acted as a bridge to Ellie, still maintaining a sort of friendship with Dina, getting slim updates from her. Through Jesse, you received updates about Ellie—whether she was safe, whether she'd eaten enough.
But it wasn't the same. Those impersonal updates couldn't replace the warmth of setting eyes on Ellie, hearing her voice—the cadence of her laughter, the way she'd say your name. You missed the little things, the mundane details that had once woven your lives together. But over the time you started to accept the turn of events, knowing you cannot force Friendship on somebody.
You started to distract yourself outside of work, whether it was with Jesse or... Sophia. After that encounter where Maria broke the news to you about Ellie changing everything, you did the only thing you knew you were really good at: You ran off.
Weirdly enough, two weeks after that pivotal moment and your  patrols with Jesse as your new partner, a knock on your door interrupted your vegetable-cutting session in the small kitchen. As you walked toward the door, a million possibilities raced through your mind. Was it Ellie, knocking on the wood on a late rainy afternoon? Or perhaps Jesse, wanting to talk? Dina? Or maybe Joel, coming all the way to the comfort of your four walls to deliver news about his beloved Ellie being hurt.
Secretly, you wished it was Ellie. So you ran a hand through your hair, glancing into the small mirror hanging near the door to check yourself out before opening the squeaky wood.  But on the other side stood Sophia, holding a plate covered in aluminum foil.  "Uhm... hey," she said, her cheeks flushed with red. "I've made some cake—way too much to eat all by myself. I wanted to share it. If, um, you want to, of course. It's chocolate cake." Her words tumbled out in a rush, and you sensed her nervousness. A Small smile spread across your face as you stepped aside, making space for her to enter the house. "That's too kind," you replied. "You've got impeccable timing. I just finished dinner—perfect time for dessert. Come inside." You didn't mention the comforting fact that her house was all the way across town, meaning she'd walked quite a distance just to bring you cake. Nor did you acknowledge that it was common knowledge that Sophia is allergic to Chocolate but it was your favorite.
One hour with Sophia turned into two, and before you knew it, the entire afternoon was filled with your laughter. She ended up staying over, making your house feel less empty. Since Dylan's passing, sleep had eluded you. Without Ellie by your side, it felt impossible to quiet your mind. Sophia changed that somewhat, but it didn't feel the same. Perhaps your own mind betrayed you, clouding your thoughts about her presence. You didn't want her to leave, yet you didn't necessarily want her to stay either. The universe seemed to decide for you, as the strawberry-blonde girl drifted off to sleep on your sofa after what felt like an eternity of talking.
You settled into your gray armchair, gently covering her thin body with your favorite blanket—the same one Ellie used to take whenever she stayed over. The entire night, you found yourself comparing Sophia to Ellie—the way she moved, the cadence of her voice, the sparkle in her eyes when she spoke about her interests. It wasn't a good thing, you must admit. Sophia is a nice girl, but you never really considered her a potential friend, especially since you both shared your first kisses with each other. After that, things got weird, and you both grew up, walking different paths.
Yet now, here she was—baking you cakes, making you laugh, and filling the void left by Ellie. The universe had a funny way of intertwining lives, even when hearts were tangled in memories and unanswered letters. Having someone else in Ellie's place is like trying to fit a puzzle piece into a space that was uniquely shaped for her. It's both comforting and disorienting—a blend of familiarity and foreignness. Her presence brings warmth, but it's a different kind—the soft glow of candlelight instead of the blazing fire that Ellie ignited.Sophia's touch is gentle, her fingers tracing patterns on your skin. But it lacks the electric charge—the pulse of longing—that Ellie's touch carried. You wonder if Sophia noticed the way you hesitated, the way your heart stumbles when she leans in too close.
The day with Sophia didnt end there, it  stretched into a comfortable rhythm, covering the next two days of your life —a dance of shared meals, laughter, and quiet moments. Her presence filled the spaces that Ellie had once occupied, and you found yourself not minding it at all. The awkwardness of those initial conversations melted away as you both peeled back layers, revealing stories and dreams that wove your lives together.
But life has a way of interrupting even the most harmonious melodies. Jesse, with his uninvited pizza and the entire Twilight saga in tow, barged into your living room. You tried to politely decline the teen romance marathon—you'd seen it one too many times—but Jesse, being Jesse, brushed off your protests. His eyes widened when he saw Sophia sitting there, a teasing grin tugging at his lips. You knew he'd milk this moment, teasing you about having a cute girl over at your house.
After Jesse left, well, pratically run out, you settled back onto the sofa next to Sophia. "That was... Jesse, right?" she asked, her fingers playing with her curly hair. You leaned against the soft material of the sofa, nodding. "Uhm, yup." Sophia's gaze lingered on you, and you sensed her curiosity. "You two do spend a lot of time together—even after patrols," she observed."Oh? You noticed that? Stalking me, huh?" you teased, making Sophia blush. Her cheeks turned a delightful shade of pink. "Well," she replied, her voice soft, "you just always catch my eye." And then, without warning, her body shifted closer. Her hands found their place on either side of your waist, and her lips met yours—a sweetness that tasted like possibility. You hated yourself for it, truly. Because here was a girl with good intentions, almost on top of you, and your mind couldn't help but wish it was Ellie.
Another two months slip through your fingers, ephemeral as morning mist. Life, once heavy with the ache of Ellie's absence, begins to lift itself up.  Sophia becomes a constant presence—a sunbeam that warms the corners of your heart as you allow yourself. Your growing relationship with Sophia blossoms, and you find comfort in her laughter, her touch, and the shared moments that weave your lives together. The unspoken question lingers: Are you allowed to call her your girlfriend? After all, you've shared more than just cake and conversations. Perhaps labels matter less than the way she looks at you, the way her fingers intertwine with yours.
And then there's Jesse—the steadfast friend who bridges the gap between patrols and pizza nights. His teasing about Sophia doesn't go unnoticed, but he's also the one who brings laughter into your home. Everything else remains unchanged—the memories, the unanswered letters, and the quiet longing. Life moves forward, and you find solace in the delicate balance of old and new. Patrol was as good as it could be, once you and Jesse found a way to connect your abilities, it didnt really feel like work anymore. 
"Yo, little one," Jesse's voice cut through the quiet of the stables, interrupting your grooming session with Lacy. You turned to meet his gaze, immediately noticing his patrol clothes—fitting perfectly against his frame. "What the hell are you doing? We have the day off, remember?" you asked, your fingers still caressing Lacy's mane.
"Not anymore," Jesse replied, already opening the door to his horse's stable. "Dina apparently has the flu, and they both forgot to sign in at the station outside. Maria asked me to take their route for today and look for anything weird." He led his dark brown horse out of the stable, determination etched on his face.
"Good luck with that," you said, turning back to continue your work. But Jesse wasn't done. "Nuh huh, lover girl. You're joining me," he declared, his tone leaving no room for argument. "Pardon?" You looked at him, confusion knitting your brows. "Don't hit me with Spanish,"- ''Its french'' Jesse chuckled. "well whatever it was,I don't speak it. Come on now, get ready. We don't have all day." He saddled his horse efficiently, his movements practiced. "Why should I? You said yes, not me," you replied stubbornly, even though you gathered all the essentials needed to prepare Lacy. "Well, because I'm your partner in crime? Your work husband? Love of your patrol life?" Jesse grinned, his eyes dancing with mischief. "And because I'll get bored alone. You don't have anything better to do anyway." - ''Rude?! maybe i had things planned?!'' You said, jokingly offended as you grab your stuff  ''You can meet sophia  and have all of those important 'converstations'' he made weird kissing noises ''later.'' He finished his sentance, making you laugh ''Well first of all I-'' You got interrupted by the sound of someone clearing their throat. You looked into the direction of the noise and saw the last person you wanted to see today. ''Sup, Ellie.'' Jesse said, leaning against the stable door. ''what can I do for you?'' He asked, eyes stuck on ellie. But her gaze lied elsewhere; On you.
You shivered under her gaze, your heart racing. As you looked into Ellie's eyes—the first time in forever—you sensed something there, something you couldn't quite put into words. Her burning gaze finally shifted from you to Jesse, arms crossed at her chest.
"Earlier, when me and Dina were at the station, I lost my journal," Ellie said, her voice close, intimate. "Can you look for it? Kinda really need it back." Her words echoed through the stable, and suddenly, the air felt too thin. Your knees wobbled, memories of Ellie cascading down the memory bridge, crashing into your stomach. You felt like you might throw up. "Sure, we will look for it. Anything else?" Jesse asked, glancing between the two of you. Ellie's eyes traveled back to you, and silent hope bloomed in your chest. Maybe this was the moment—maybe Ellie would finally have the guts to talk to you directly, to say she's sorry. But as her gaze wavered, you felt the familiar pang of disappointment. Once again, Ellie remained silent.You felt a strong hand on your shoulder, silently offering support. Jesse's familiar scent enveloped you. "Thought so," he said, ending the conversation. Ellie nodded and turned away, leaving the two of you alone. The barn was filled with silence until you spoke with a shaky voice. "Okay, let's just go." And so you did—you and Jesse left for patrol. But with every passing second, the memory of that confrontation lingered, and you realized how much you still craved her.
"Jesus, I hate this path," Jesse grumbled, pushing open the old, creaky door to the station. His face turned red from the effort, and you couldn't help but giggle. "Stop crying like a baby. Let's sign in and leave," you said, walking toward the desk on the opposite side of the room. As you approached, you noticed that a pen was missing. Without it, you obviously couldn't sign in.
"Jesse, there's no pen," you called out, looking at your friend. "Really? Look under the table or something. We'll find one," he replied. You followed his suggestion, getting down on your knees. Spiderwebs greeted you, along with the encroaching dusk. You pulled out your flashlight, shining it underneath the table for a better look. And there it was—an old, leather-covered book. You'd recognize that book spine anywhere, even in the grandest libraries.
You picked it up, wiping away the dust that clung to its material. The thickness of the journal reminded you of what you were holding—a door to Ellie Williams' secrets and mindful thoughts. "Found one!" Jesse's voice snapped you out of your reverie. You turned around, hiding the journal behind your back. Jesse joined you, writing your names on the slim paper of the checklist. ‘Partner in crimes ( Jesse and y/n)’
"Did you find anything? The book, I mean. It's not somewhere I looked," Jesse asked. You shook your head, slipping the journal into your bag without it being noticed. "Nope, didn't find it either."
''Every poem I ever wrote was about her. That smile of hers, those golden eyes—whenever she's too close to the sun, it's impossible for me to stay away. The day I left, my heart shattered into a million pieces. In my head, inside my perfect self-made world, she never left me. All my thoughts revolve around her—the memories etched into my mind. Her touch, so soft—I never wanted to let go. The scent of her clothes, stealing my breath away. The nights we spent dreaming together, the minutes I never want to regret. I never dared to imagine a lifetime without her. Yet here I am, writing these words with a hole in my chest. I'm bleeding out, the wind kissing my mind, refreshing memories of letting go. The silence surrounds me, a reminder to hold on.
I search the past for redemption, but it eludes me. The only thing left of me are broken pieces of her.”
The words were carefully etched onto the paper, making it hard for you to breathe. You hadn't intended to overstep her privacy—why had you taken that journal in the first place? You dont know.  But here you were, sitting with the book in hand, the only light in the living room emanating from the countless candles you'd lit.
The journal looked thicker than usual, and that's what caught your attention first. You knew that book well, even though you'd never seen what she put inside—except for her drawings of animals, Joel, Dina, and you. She'd never shown anyone what she wrote between the pages.
The reason you'd decided to open the book, against all your inner morals, was the fact that as you carefully pulled it out of your bag—treating it like fragile glass—multiple letters fell out. You noticed them right away. They were yours—carefully written letters she'd never dared to answer. The envelopes ripped open showed you she defenetly read them all. You dont know how to feel about that yet. Relieved that she cared enough to read them? Happy becasue she carried your letters with her, doesnt matter where shed go? Or mad, because she never replied? You know nothing. The only thing you're able to do now is bury yourself in the book, reading what Ellie never dared to say out loud.
''Ive been having a hard time adjusting, I had the shiniest wheels, now they're rusting. I didn't know if you'd care if I came back, I have a lot of regrets about that. Pulled the car off the road to the lookout, Could've followed my fears all the way down. And maybe I don't quite know what to say but I'm here in your doorway. I just wanted you to know that this is me trying'' 
The words cut deeper than a knife,
before you knew it, your eyes traveled to the next phrases, crossed out, you could barely read them:
"It's hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you.
Seeing you with Sophie burns me from inside out.
Why are you with her?
I know I don't own you, perhaps I never will,
so the anger inside of me when I see you with her
is something I'm not allowed to feel.
What I feel, I shouldn't show you.
So when you're around, I don't.
I let you walk away with her.
I know I don't have the right to feel it,
but it doesn't mean I don't."
The rest of the book was empty, besides some skteches of eyes that look dangerously like yours. You swallowed hard, not really sure of what you should feel. You re-read the sentences out loud, letting the bittersweet aftertaste of them making you feel alive. Your heart has been Ellies since the first time you both laughed together; yet you were so sure of the fact that she would never feel the same. Considering the words in the journal, maybe it wasnt one sided after all. Youre confused, being with Sophia was easy, comftable. But with ellie, it was different. better. You miss the butterflies in your stomach, miss her touch and her closeness. The rollercoster was everything you ever had, after all.
Two days of full selfishness carried its weight, and you continued to keep the journal. The guilt crept in, stealthy as shadows, finding you at night, when the world slept and your thoughts roamed free. Those written pages from Ellie, inked with longing and crossed-out confessions, haunted your mind. You tried your best to hide the pain, a fragile masquerade. Distancing yourself from Sophia and Jesse, you walked the tightrope of deception. It wasn't deliberate; it was survival. The what-could've-been danced like a ghost, whispering secrets in your ear. You wondered if Ellie's heart echoed the same unspoken words.
Sophia, her presence a comforting harbor, yet her touch felt like borrowed warmth. And Jesse, his eyes— The guilt gnawed at you, a relentless hunger. You held Sophia too close, fearing Ellie's phantom gaze. You looked into Jesse's eyes, and the lie about keeping the Journal tasted bitter on your tongue.  Ellie, elusive as a wisp of smoke. The barn encounter—the air thick with unspoken truths—left you breathless. You havent seen her since. You called in sick for the patrol meeting, a desperate escape from the inevitable. The fear of facing her again, of unraveling the fragile equilibrium, gripped your heart.
In the quiet of your room, the journal lay open. The crossed-out phrases, the sketches of eyes—they were your silent companions.
——————————————————-
"Okay, Miss being all sad and distant, I'm not having this anymore. Tell me what's going on right now or I'm killing you," Jesse declared, pressing past you as you opened the door. His urgency hung in the air, a storm brewing behind his eyes.
"Jesus, very aggressive today, aren't we?" you quipped, trailing after your friend into the living room. The door closed behind you, sealing you both in a cocoon of tension. You sank into the couch, and Jesse settled next to you, his gaze drilling holes into your soul."Therapy session. Now. What's going on?" His hands clasped together, a makeshift gavel. The room felt smaller, suffocating. You glanced at the coffee table, considering the whiskey bottle, but thought better of it. "Nothing? Do you want to drink anything... or?" Your voice played innocent, a fragile mask. Jesse wasn't fooled. "The jury says stop trying to change the subject." His tone held a mix of exasperation and concern."The jury...?" You grinned, despite the weight in your chest. "Yeah, me." Jesse's eyes softened, and you chuckled. "It's nothing, really.“
"You're completely distant," he said, his voice calm. "Even Sophia asked me if I have any idea what's going on." The truth hung between you like a fragile thread, ready to snap.
"I don't know... it's, urgh, weird." You fidgeted with the edge of a cushion. Jesse leaned closer, his breath warm against your cheek. "Tell me!" His insistence bordered on desperation
"Okay, but promise me not to hate me?" You gave him a side-eye, afraid of meeting his gaze head-on. "Could never hate you," he replied, and the words carried weight. So you spilled it—the secret you'd harbored, the journal you'd found.
Ellie's words, inked and crossed out, danced in your memory. You didn't reveal the exact phrasing, but you shared the confusion—the way her emotions bled through the pages. Jesse listened, his eyes wide, and you wondered if he saw the echoes of your own heartache.
In that quiet room, the truth hung heavy. You'd kept Ellie's words hidden, but now they spilled forth. Jesse's hand found yours, and you clung to it, hoping for absolution. "It's Ellie," you whispered. "It's always been Ellie."  His silence spoke volumes, eyes carrying the weight of unspoken understanding. He'd always sensed your feelings for Ellie, perhaps even before you did. It wasn't a secret to anyone but her—the way your heart gravitated toward her, like a moth drawn to a flame. “You guys need to talk.” Jesse said.
"I can't," you whispered, the words fragile on your tongue. The weight of unspoken truths pressed against your chest, threatening to spill forth."And why the fuck not? What do you have to lose?" Jesse's voice held a mix of frustration and concern. He saw through your defenses, stripped away the layers you'd carefully woven. Ellie—the enigma, the ache—loomed between you like a shadow."Afraid of losing her? I think you already archived that." His bluntness cut through your heart. You knew it too well—the missed chances, the crossed-out phrases, the silence that echoed louder than words. Jesse could see the pain in you and the bluntless paired with that slight tinge of what appeared to be anger slowly disappeared into thin air, much like the smoke of a lit cigarette blown into the night sky.
"Look" he begins, sighing while he considers the phrasing of this. He means no harm, but being too gentle could erase the importance of the situation "I want to help you, but you cannot hide yourself away. If you truly want this girl, you need to be able to put in the effort. Dina and Ellie arent dating either, dina told me herself that the two of them thought there was something but ended up with nothing. Be honest with yourself, but also with everyone else" You exhale deeply, relief floods your system despite the heavy heart still pounding against your chest.
Jesse is the kind of friend you can never let go. He's just that important.
Between the soft tunes of comfortingly familiar songs and a few shed tears, the two of you scheme together... Creating a, hopefully, foolproof plan on how to finally approach the elephant in the room. Ellie and you; it wasn't over, was it?
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inkblackorchid · 1 month
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Can I ask you something? Have you considered doing a fanfic of Aki facing odd against her hold black rose witch persona which I'm surprised wasn't a episode to begin with I mean the idea is too good to waste
The ask box is always open for a reason, my friend!
But to answer your question: Yes, I absolutely have considered the idea of Aki coming face to face with the Black Rose Witch and being forced to confront her own past in a very literal way. The problem with this scenario is mainly one: Logistics. Seeing as Aki can hardly physically split herself in two, making this possible would require supernatural shenanigans of some kind, if you ask me. And sure, 5Ds has plenty of those, but what to use? Time travel? (High potential to shoot yourself in the foot.) A sort of supernatural test of willpower? (Okay, sure, but where, why, and how?) Try to keep it simple, say it's just a nightmare and all in Aki's head? (Possible, but pretty basic.) Say Iliaster creates another signer double, and Aki has to take it down same as Jack took down his? (Runs the risk of being a rehash of the fake Jack episodes, unfortunately.)
Depending on how they're written, I don't necessarily think any of these options are better or worse than the other, and I agree, the opportunity to have Aki literally confront herself would have been great. As far as my own writing is concerned, my main issue, personally, would be where the hell to slot this into canon. Because writing it just as-is, with zero context and no place on the canon timeline, isn't my style. Therefore, I'd have to find a spot for this, and ideally give it some kind of nice payoff, too. And the way my Aki stuff is going right now, especially with the next, big fic I'm currently working on, I'm not sure I could fit this in anywhere. (At least not without making things seem really, really bloated in terms of plot threads and tension.)
That said, I have thought about it before, and may yet think more about it in the future. So I'm not categorically denying I'll ever write this. I'd just love to place it somewhere where it makes sense and haven't found that spot (nor the best way to execute this scenario) just yet.
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cangrellesteponme · 2 years
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13, 14, and 19 for the writing asks!
What feedback did you receive for your writing that stuck with you?
This is going to sound very stupid, but what haunts me is the importance of making your work readable.
How well or shittily you write doesn't matter if your work is an ugly wall of text that no one will read. I was taught about that in detail when I was around 11 (harsh teachers...), and then I was told how to do it a bit better when I was 13. As you know, I'm 20, so... yeah never forgetting that.
But yeah, learn from me (and my French teachers) and fix your format. Prescriptivism is inherently wrong and all but if you want to listen, or at least know the rules before you break them, it's easy.
A new idea is a new paragraph. Dialogue is a new paragraph. Use the right quotation marks for your language. Use the right dialogue format too. Free Indirect Speech or Thought is a new paragraph unless it actually fits into the idea you're developing (and italicise that shit, for the love of god, unless you're intentionally making it unclear). Use your tenses correctly (English literally has two. Just pick one and stick to it, or if you want to switch it up, do so only if it actually adds to your storytelling).
This is like, some basic Writing Format 101, and I have a lot more things to say (especially as someone who has corrected, proofread, and reviewed a fuckton of writing from their peers) but that would take hours.
What is something that you feel weird/uncomfortable writing about?
Plenty of things, actually.
We all know that I only write sex scenes if I'm paid to do it, so there's that. I may fit the "all aces write good smut" cliché but I am not willing, okay.
But also writing very emotional characters is out of my comfort zone. For Open The Door, I wrote from Virgil's (the literal embodiment of anxiety) POV and through the whole thing I was like "what does severe anxiety even feel like... i think i'm actually writing sensory overload there let me fix that... oh no that's PTSD... eh, that works" because I'm simply not a very anxious person. And I struggle with big emotions in general for the same reason - I'm just a very repressed rational bitch.
I also have a hard time writing empathy, comfort, and all those complex... social things. I'm not talking in terms of skill, or ability - I mean that I'm honestly just not having a great time with those things because it takes so much effort (but I balance it out with more fun stuff! like heartbreaking angst <3).
Show us the line you want readers to remember from your story.
I'll answer this for Staring Contest, obviously.
It has to be one of those two:
"Baldroy does not like many things about many people, but today he decides that he particularly hates the way Sebastian Michaelis looks at their young master."
"There’s something fragile and worn, a breath away from breaking, bubbling under the surface but ready to cool down in a second."
Obviously, Staring Contest has no dialogue (except one line from Ciel, because I simply couldn't be bothered to change it) and a very honest focaliser, which kind of restricted my ability to hide the truth in a bunch of lies so I had to work a lot with omissions.
With the first line, I think what I'm implying is obvious (even the second, more disturbing layer of it also is. i mean we've all read the manga. canon seb is a creep), and I want the reader to keep that in mind, for reasons similar to the second line. For the second one, I wanted it to be a sweet, memorable line with just a hint of carefully sprinkled pain.
For both of those, what you should remember is that appearances or suddenly developed feelings of paternal affection don't matter - this is still a dangerous demon whose sole intent is to get that dinner. The affection is fragile not only because it's new, but also because it can and will be crushed if needed. Both of those line highlight, in different ways, how fucked up this all is. But yeah it's all hidden in the fluffy dadbastian vibes.
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flametrashiraarchive · 9 months
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Can I request n/sfw headcanons for muzan x non violent demon reader?
(⁠っ⁠˘⁠з⁠(⁠˘⁠⌣⁠˘⁠ ⁠)
YES YES YES
Okay so you know this got my cogs turning and it ended up being more of a short story instead of headcanons lol. And yeah, I went with the idea of the reader being a demon who can draw strength from Muzan in... other ways 😏
Also this was an excellent excuse for me to write a "Muzan losing his composure and coming completely undone" fic so thank you thank you thank you 🛐
I hope you like it!
NSFW under the cut!
Succor - Muzan x Reader
(Non-violent demon reader, GN!Reader)
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You were a curiosity. Another demon who did not consume human flesh– only the third such demon Muzan had heard of in a thousand years, and the only one of those three who wasn't actively revolting against him.
However, the thought did occur to him to simply dispose of you. You were defective after all, still clinging to your humanity. And you were weak too; slowly starving. 
Muzan had no use for you… and yet… and yet…
Perhaps it was simple morbid curiosity, or perhaps it was the wasted potential he saw in you. Before he transformed you into a demon you were beautiful, but once imbued with his strength and blood, you were divine… magnificent. And you were frittering that gift away.
"Explain yourself to me," he said as you knelt before him, barely clinging to your senses while he sat, poised and elegant as ever. "Why are you suffering like this for the sake of mortals? Why do you refuse to consume humans?"
"It's repulsive," you answered. He could hear the weakness in your voice even as you stared defiantly back at him.
The only blood you had ever consumed was Muzan's at the moment of your creation, and your body seemed to recognize that. The hunger in your eyes was palpable. It thrummed in the air between you. Your survival depended on getting more of it. You craved it.
Your stubbornness was obvious too, and if the past thousand years had taught him anything it was that minds like yours could not be changed with violence and threats. No, he had to win you over gently. He would have to love you into becoming the monster he needed. He would adore you into submission.
He leaned forward in his seat and placed two fingers beneath your chin, tilting your face toward him. "You would be a very special demon if you would only feed."
Oh, your hunger was dizzying. You were fighting so hard to retain your composure. He slowly dragged his thumb across your lower lip, relishing the way your eyes closed in response to his touch.
You were lovely, despite your defects. 
"Eat," he said, his lips so close to yours he could feel the warmth of your breath on his skin. "Please. I do not wish to see you fade away."
He placed a tender kiss on your lips, and another and another. You were so fragile, so drained.
Then something in you switched.
His eyes widened as you suddenly gripped the back of his head, pulling him to you with a ferocity he did not think you were capable of. 
Overpowering you still would have been easy; as simple as swatting away a gnat. But this sudden burst of strength was intriguing. You kissed him deeper and deeper, your tongue easing past his lips as a soft, satisfied moan emerged from you.
Something twinged, low in Muzan's belly. It had been centuries since he felt anything akin to desire, but you were seemingly intent on unraveling him. With every passing second your passion blazed hotter… and your strength was growing. 
Your fingers clung to him with an iron grip, as if your very survival hinged on his kiss. His crimson eyes widened once more as the realization hit him– you were in fact drawing strength from kissing him. It seemed his saliva had the same effect on your demonic body as his blood. 
He kissed you deeper still, intrigued and excited by your newfound vigor. After a thousand years of living, Muzan had assumed he had seen everything, but there you were, proving him wrong. You were so greedy for it too, your kisses so passionate and hungry they made the world tilt a little. 
He pulled back to examine you. "My dear, I–"
His breath caught in his throat as your hands went straight to the fastening of his trousers. Your eyes were near black with primal hunger as you pulled out his semi-hard cock. You wrapped your lips around it without hesitation and began to suck his tip. 
"Ohh~" Muzan choked out, gripping the sides of the seat as your tongue swirled around the head of his dick and teased his slit. 
It didn't take long for him to go from semi-hard to achingly erect. The power you wielded over his body, his helpless involuntary reaction; it was humiliating. And yet he did nothing to stop you. His breaths shivered out of him as he fought with everything he had not to buck his hips up into your mouth so you would take him all.
"How… dare… y– nghh…" his back arched as you palmed his balls, and wrapped your other hand around the base of his cock, milking him with that same hunger you had while kissing him. 
Oh gods, that was it, wasn't it? You wanted his seed, you needed it to sustain your continued perverse existence. You would not consume human flesh but you would draw power from him instead.
"You filthy little thing," he whispered through gritted teeth as you lapped up each bead of precum dripping from his cock. 
Your eyes were no longer lifeless; they glittered with vitality. 
Muzan's thighs trembled as your lips slid up and down his shaft , taking him to the very back of your throat, licking and sucking like the greedy degenerate you were. 
The wooden arm rests of the seat creaked and splintered beneath Muzan's fingers as he squeezed them, gasping as the pressure in his core became unbearable and he drew closer and closer to release.
"You want it, don't you… hm? Ohh, yes, you want my cum. I'm going… I'm going to give it… to… y–" He gasped for air, shattering the arm rest entirely. "Ohhh… ffffuck…"
He came undone, deep, guttural cries emerging from him as you swallowed his spend with fervor until he was sure he had nothing left. 
And then you kept on sucking. 
"M-more…" you growled as you continued to lap at his overstimulated cock, pressing your hand to his belly and holding him down.
His hand darted up to the wall above his head with such force the wood shattered beneath his palm as he released a choked cry. Gods, what were you other than his undoing? The pathetic, broken sounds of his whimpers enraged him but he would not stop you.
Heat prickled across his entire body. His face was flushed and gleaming with a fine mist of sweat which only added to his humiliation.  All that strength and power, yet he was helpless as you sucked his cock. 
"Damn you, damn you…hhhgh…"
His second orgasm tore through him like a beast with its claws drawn. Your greedy mouth claimed him entirely, swallowing down every drop of his essence as he came again. 
"Ohh Gods… oh Gods you filthy wretch…" his body shuddered as his pleasure waned and you finally ceased your sucking. 
Still, you gazed at him and audaciously lapped his tip, ensuring you'd got every last drop. And when you were finally satisfied you sat back, as a contented smile spread across your lips. 
Muzan took your face between his hands and inspected you. Your eyes were burning with vitality. Your skin was flushed and warm. You were rejuvenated completely, as if you had consumed a hundred mortal souls.
Your beauty and power were unlike anything he had ever seen. Such a curiosity.
"Fascinating," he whispered as his pulse slowly returned to normal. "Yes, I think I'll keep you here with me."
Further study was most definitely required. 
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awearywritersworld · 9 months
Text
gratitude
gojo satoru x reader summary: gojo wakes up early one morning, suddenly aware that he can't live without you. w/c: .5k tags/warnings: fluff. gn!reader. a/n: happy jjk day!!! masterlist check out my latest work for gojo here
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gojo satoru is something of a stranger to gratitude, but can anyone really blame him? he was born with unmatched strength, unaccustomed to the blood, sweat, and tears many people shed to gain even a fraction of the power he possesses.
he's the son of one of the wealthiest clans in japan, so he's never gone to bed hungry, nor has he ever had to wear a pair of shoes that were past their prime. he's also blessed with good looks, always flaunting the kind of smile that makes people turn their heads.
now, that's not to say he's never felt thankful in his life. quite the contrary. he was thankful when nanami returned to jujutsu tech and when yuuji came back to life even after sukuna ripped out his heart. hell, he was thankful for the kid at the bakery who served him a particularly exquisite lemon loaf last week.
but he's never felt true gratitude. you know, the kind you experience when you're given something you can't possibly live without. the kind that moves you, shakes you to the core.
that is, until he's laying in bed beside you, already awake as the sun begins to kiss the morning sky. his eyes trail over your face in the pale blue light of dawn, taking great pains to commit every little detail to memory.
it's then that he feels it, gratitude that seeps into his bones and fills him with relief, hope, and elation all at once. gratitude that changes him as a person, because how could he exist without you? without the soft curve of your nose, without the fullness of your lips, without those cute little snores that let him know you're still sleeping peacefully?
you're laying on your stomach, your back exposed and the sheet bunched around your waist. he traces each divot of your spine with a careful and loving touch, acutely aware that there isn't a thing in the world that could possibly compare to the feeling of your skin against his own.
"'toru? what're you doing awake?" you ask groggily, pulling him from his thoughts.
"hmph.. can't sleep 'cause you're such a blanket hog."
"yeah? are you sure you're not just staring at me again, all googly eyed and creepy?" you pop one eye open to discern the look on his face.
"i've got no idea what you're talking about," he asserts, pulling you against his chest in an attempt to obscure his guilty grin.
you've already seen it though. "i think you're delusional or something, you should get some more sleep."
you feel his chest shift, a breath of a laugh passing his nose. "yeah, you're probably right."
you hum, satisfied with his answer, then tangle your legs with his and close your eyes. "i love you."
gojo has taken a lot of things for granted in his life, he's smart enough to know that, but those three words? from your lips? he'll be grateful for them until the end of time.
"i love you, too."
taglist: @torusmochi @moonmalice
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chrollohearttags · 3 months
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“..smile for me, daddy..”
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you take quite the liking to eren’s newest piece of jewelry!
oral sex (p + a eating), spit play, hair pulling, fingering, squirting, need I say more?
I’ve written this trope before but I’m doing it again because why not?! I can’t get it out of my head and I am pushing this agenda. (Also trying to ease back into writing because I’ve been bullshitting.)
* . °•★|•°∵ ∵°•* . °•★|•°∵ ∵°•* . °•★|•°∵ ∵°•* . °•★|•°∵ ∵°•
“What you think, my man? How ya’ like it?”
“..yeah, this is the one, dude..definitely the one..”
stood before the counter at Schiaparelli Jewelers, brandishing a mirror in one hand as the the other casually stroked over his chin, Eren’s lips curled into that of quite the smirk; in turn, refracting off of the light..to say that he was satisfied with the result of his latest commission, would be a very gross understatement. Schiaparelli’s had become a staple in Miami's Design District. A multi-generational business with a reputation that preceded them. With infamy rivaled next to Johnny Dang. Having catered to celebrities and the city’s elite alike, they curated the most beautiful pieces with the utmost care. Thus, earning them millions and a recurring clientele. Among those were the Underground God himself and seasoned musical maestro, EJ the Don. Who had gotten everything from his first chain to the wedding ring he placed on his beloved (y/n)’s finger a year prior. VVS diamonds glistened from the bottom row of his already perfectly aligned teeth as he examined the new grill he had just acquired. A spur of the moment decision he’d made on impulse while you were away on another modeling trip. The custom mold wrapped his entire bottom and encapsulated his canines with red stones. It was absolutely beautiful and although the piece had set him back roughly fifteen thousand, it was well worth it and deserved in his opinion! Having just been nominated for two writing awards and a third for album of the year. Awards season was approaching and although it wasn’t among his priorities to attend, it was still a feat worth celebrating. Not to mention, it was quite the confidence boost as well. He wasn’t one to base his self worth in extravagant jewelry or expensive clothes, but he was certainly feeling quite good about himself in these. He loved the way they looked against his lips and how they complimented his teeth.
dapping up the jeweler, EJ thanked the man once more and proceeded to give him quite the hefty payment for his services..of course, self gratification wasn’t the only reason he had gone and copped this new piece for his collection. He was actually hoping to get a little something more out of the deal..
“That’s what I like to hear, my man! Listen, how do you think the missus will react? Think she’ll like ‘em?”
a question he was certain he’d find out the answer to as you had just shot him a text, saying that you’d made it home and of course..to hurry back to you! Not a moment too soon, in his opinion. He’d spent all week longing to see you again and what better way to greet you than with a surprise like this?
“..I guess we’ll find out soon enough..”
* . °•★|•°∵ ∵°•* . °•★|•°∵ ∵°•
“Mmph…Rennnnn, baeee! Stop—oh my gosh…”
the words spilling out in a trail of whiny huffs being drawn forth from your mouth. Among many other lewd sounds leaving you at the moment. Just as he had expected, your reaction was one he could’ve spotted from a mile away..the second Eren made it back home through the door, (y/n) came rushing him as you leaped forth into his arms. It didn’t take long after spinning you around with an array of kisses for you to spot them..the faint glint from his mouth as you slowly pecked at it. It was when you took his bottom lip between your teeth and tugged gently, did you reveal his little secret. He could tell immediately from the glare on your face, just what you thought of it. That was also apparent by your sudden shift in demeanor..going from subtle, flirtatious kissing to full blown, unadulterated lust. He had no interest in setting you to your feet or halting your advances, especially when you continued to swirl your tongue around his own and continue filling his head with compliments. From how sexy he looked with them and how badly you desired to wet them up! “Yeah? I’m glad you like them, baby.” That was to say the least. He wasn’t shocked in the slightest and once he heard your opinions, he no longer felt any reservations about his purchase! So fast forward, and the two of you moved your little party to the downstairs game room, where he’d often reside on his days off. You’d find yourself on the leather couch in the corner, legs spread to either side as he feasted at your center. Nearly seven days had passed since you’d seen one another in person and nearly ten since you’d had any physical touch so it was obvious what was on either of your minds. Inked up fingers laced around your throat in an effort to make certain your eyes never shifted from his. Meanwhile, you couldn’t help but to glare down at him with tears and lust teeming at your waterline. A finger slid between your lips as your husband delicately flicked that tongue around your clit..and each time, he’d make certain to flash you a toothy grin. In which you’d catch those sparkling diamonds littering his mouth.
“You sure you want me to stop, baby? I mean..you were the one begging me to make you come in my mouth.” Prompting both of you to burst into laughter. He knew that it was only because you were so close to your peak. Apparent by the creamy secretions leaking down his chin and staining that silver. How he craved your essence, your flavor and the feeling of you dripping onto his tongue. How good it felt to hear your moans coagulating with the sounds of his loud slurping, erupting throughout the room. Those white toes resting atop his bare shoulder blades, curled up at the slightest brush of your little bud. “I-I..fuck, it just feels so good, baby. Please..keep going.” (Y/N) uttering with the heave of your chest, rising and falling at a rapid rate as you tried to control your breathing.
“That’s what I thought..now lay your pretty ass back and lemme take care of you..lemme eat this pussy. Missed you so bad..”
with that, he’d continue his ascent into your soaking cunt. Exploring every fold, crevice and every delectable part of his beautiful wife. It may have been his favorite pastime if he were being completely honest…eating you until he brought you to the brink of tears and ecstasy. There was something so satisfying about it. Especially with the euphoric feeling of those juices making contact with his mouthpiece. Your fingertips would run underneath his chin and stroke the side of his face as his own dug into the thick flesh of your thighs..kneading slowly and keeping you in place. “Fuck…you look so sexy. Shit..” tossing your head back and releasing another breathy giggle from the overstimulating pleasure. “..swear you gon’ make me come, daddy..right there.” Guiding him along with your hand and those loud whimpers. That sundress that wrapped your body was shuffled down to your tummy as it bunched up underneath your breasts. You’d alternate between them and those dark tresses of his, not entirely sure what to do with yourself as you were unraveling.
“Don’t tease me now, princess. I need all of that..please..”
only taking a breath momentarily to work a couple digits inside of that hole as it spasmed on the air. He knew you needed to be filled but for now, he wanted to continue his feast..in more ways than one. As he parted your legs even further and continued working those digits in and out, Eren tugged you towards him. The only time he’d become forceful, as to keep you restrained. Because whilst you were focusing on the gentle thrust of his fingers in your pussy, his tongue would snake south to your puckering hole. Where the tip prodded at it and he’d flick around until you were trembling. Pleasure only increased tenfold when you pinched at those sensitive nipples. You could barely contain yourself and it was only a matter of time before he’d be getting that sweet release. He’d squeeze at your plump asscheeks as he switched between your entrances. Lobbing each hole with a very generous amount of spit. Soft whimpers arose from your throat and even hitched but that wasn’t enough for him. He needed that body to fall apart within his grasp and to react only the way he could make it happen.
“Come on, gorgeous. Let me have it. You wanna come, don’t you?”
that toothy smirk appeared yet again along with a high pitched coo. It never fails to make you melt..with the nod of your head, you’d shake vehemently, just grasping at anything to feign off the swelling in the pit of your stomach. One that was only mere seconds from exploding.
“Aw, then let it out. Do what you said you would earlier..or you gon’ hold back on me?” Teasing as he continued to push up into your most sensitive spot. And it didn’t take long until you were exploding all over the couch and of course, those silver slugs lining your man’s mouth. “Fuck! Fuck!—“ “..thereeee we go!” (Y/N) released a shroud of juices that spilled onto the cushions and Eren let his tongue wag as he lapped up every single drop..those fingers sopping with your creaminess. Which he’d let you slurp off once you were able to compose yourself.
“Shit!..Kiss me..” whining as you tugged him up by his chain and into your grasp. Shoving that tongue back between his lips and tasting the remnants of yourself against those grills. Cupping his face between your palms, you’d pull away from each other to meet gazes once more. That’s when he’d smile for you once again and you’d swoon for him all over again.
“Yeah, I’m gonna need you to wear those more..like all the time.”
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peachesofteal · 8 months
Note
Speaking about Ghost/Soap/Darling omegaverse... May I bring the idea of Soap and Ghost being alpha and Darling an omega? But wait, let me sprinkle a little of angsty thoughts about it:
Johnny and Simon get to spend their ruts together. Hell, they share a room, and even on base they get to have privacy and go through them with the help of each other, not only fulfilling their physical needs, which are sated of course, but also emotional. Yeah sure, heats are emotional but ruts are too, and they spend so much time together that almost, if not all of their ruts together have been spent in the company of each other.
But Darling? Imagine Darling having a heat every time she's alone. Simon and Johnny gone on some mission, gone for weeks and sometimes even months. Trying to satisfy herself with whatever smell is left on Simon's hoodie or Johnny's shirt. She tries to brush away the thoughts of loneliness and being left out that arise every time she rests in her nest, every time she has to painfully get through her heats without her mates' company.
Hell, she tries to hide everything every time Johnny and Simon come home, smelling like each other and fresh bite marks on their necks. She really, really tries. But nothing escapes those two, no. They can smell that little, slightly rotten smell on Darling, sensing her discomfort and those bouts of anger flaring up, those hints of desperation hiding in a slightly-rotten fruit smell. It becomes stronger and stronger each time she sees how close they are after they tell her that another rut came while they were on base, and her? At this point she might lie and say she's on suppressants. Again, they at least suspect about it.
But hell, the fact that there are always fresh bite marks on them every time they come home, while hers is is non-existent (Johnny and Simon foolishly believe she doesn't wish to be bitten), is NOT helping at all.
And they realize how drastic, how deep the problem is once their leave coincides with Darling's heat.
Except she hides. She doesn't let them in, because they maybe have never seen her on her heats.
She doesn't trust them to know how to deal with it, how to deal with an omegas' most vulnerable moment when all they've known is how alphas deal with their ruts.
Darling doesn't trust them, not fully, at least.
Djsjjd jfc when you said omegaverse I was 👁️👁️. Peach I hope you're having such a good day and I must thank you once more for giving us such beautiful stories, I hope nothing but good things happen to you from now on:)
— 🫔 Anon
Oh… okay, I see you. This is so good! There’s so much to explore here… 🩵
18+ / dead disco omegaverse au (it needs a name but we’ll get there?) / mature themes
The door swings wide, and Johnny is nearly bowled over by the scent. It’s everywhere in the flat, wafting down the hall to where they both stand at the threshold, overcome with the smell of overripe fruit, something sour and tart hovering at the precipice.
It’s the smell of their omega in distress.
But what surprises them both, is along with the burnt tannins of distress, is another smell. A ripe smell, a bruised stone fruit smell.
The smell of an omega in heat.
But their omega doesn’t have heats. You’re on suppressants.
Still, it’s definitely your scent. There’s no mistaking it.
Simon tenses, hackles rising with a growl. Johnny’s hand finds his chest, placing his palm over the older, bigger alpha’s heart soothingly. They’ve just both come off a rut, poor timing all things considered. Both exhausted, they were looking forward to getting home and falling into bed with you, cuddling you close while they both slept off the stress from the op and the remaining… sensitivities.
“Darling?” Simon calls, keeping his voice soft and easy.
There’s no answer. The flat is silent.
“Love? Are you here?” Johnny tries, pushing through to the bedroom, where he’s half expecting to see you curled up in the bed.
Except, you’re not.
It looks like you may have been, at one point. It’s a pile of blankets and pillows, haphazardly arranged with various shirts and other soft things.
Johnny chokes on a breath. The scent is much, much stronger in here, and Simon’s eyes slide closed as he draws a deep inhale.
“Omega?” He murmurs, and to their relief, there’s a small whimper from the closet.
When he gets the door open, his heart breaks. Simon’s body goes preternaturally still, and they both stare down at you.
You’re drenched in sweat, burrowed in a pile of clothes, eyes wide. You reek, panic and fear, distress and pain burning in their nostrils, along with the overripe scent, the telltale smell of a heat. Worse, when you look up at them, there’s no recognition there. Nothing to show that you know who they are to you, or even where you are. Johnny shoves away his panic over your confusion, this state, to try to coax you forward into his arms.
“Hey, there ye are.” He reaches for you, slowly, and your body presses against the corner, head shaking back and forth. Johnny frowns. “Darling, it’s okay. It’s us, you’re alright.” His hand gets closer, nearly brushing you knee, and then to their absolute shock, you snarl.
Simon is conflicted. He’s confused.
Why did you tell them you’re on suppressants?
They would have done things a lot differently, if that wasn’t the case. They wouldn’t have left you alone, if they had known. His stomach clenches when he thinks about the possibility that this isn’t the first time you’ve been on your own during a heat.
“Darling.” Simon coos. He doesn’t want to reach for you. He doesn’t want to pull you from the closet, this safe spot you’ve built, your nest. He doesn’t want to force you out, like his father would have. Like he always did to his mother. His father would have gripped you so hard it would have hurt you, left bruises on you. He would have terrified you, taken joy from it. “Omegas are weak.” Simon was raised to believe. “The lesser. It’s our job to teach ‘em.”
You snort out a trembling breath from your nose, little groan slipping from your lips and you rub your wrist on your gland. Johnny makes a strangled sound in his throat as it happens, and Simon doesn’t need to ask to know what he’s thinking.
Only omegas who have been abandoned or lost their mates try to self soothe like that, scent themselves like that. It’s an instinct, something that happens to try to prevent them from becoming overheated or harmed by a heat unmanaged.
“No, no no. It’s alright, love, we’re here.” Johnny pleads, hand still tentatively outstretched while you stare at his fingers. Every time your wrist rubs over your gland, they both cringe, and Johnny’s body goes rigid.
“I- don’t-” You stutter. You blink at them slowly, and he can see it all on your face, plain as day. The pain. The confusion. The distress.
Simon crouches, just outside the closet. He starts up a soothing rumble, trying to lure you towards him. You lift your head slowly when you hear it, when you feel the subharmonics, the song that sings to you.
“Come here, baby.” Your brow creases, and you rub your face. You look exhausted, like you haven’t slept in days and he wonders how long you’ve been you like this, how long you’ve been suffering. You don’t smell like pre heat, so you must be on the curve upwards. Guilt burns in his stomach. “It’s alright now.” Johnny moves next to him, shifting into a kneel very slowly while you watch him, hazy gaze fixed on the bite marks on his neck, over his gland.
“You’re safe.” Johnny coaxes, and he keeps his hand towards you, but unmoving, trying to show you that neither of them are a threat.
They both work to emit soothing scents, trying to lull you into their arms. You watch them warily, curiously, eyes opening and closing in slow motion as your instincts battle whatever confusion is happening beneath the surface.
It works. You crawl slowly out from the corner, t shirt sticking to your skin, your arms trembling under your weight.
“Good girl.” Simon murmurs. Neither of them move, afraid to spook you, and then you’re curling up between their bodies, rubbing your wrist against your gland over and over.
You tuck yourself into them, head laying on Simon’s chest and his hand comes slowly to rub your back, getting you used to his touch, easing you into a more relaxed state while Johnny smooths a hand over your shoulder, coasting his wrist closer and closer to your gland, trying to scent you subtly and soothe you, gentle you. You whimper when he makes contact, and they both press a little closer.
“Shhh. You’re okay, darling. We’re here.” Simon bows his head, skimming his nose overtop your scalp, and you shift, hands grabbing for Johnny, trying to pull his body overtop yours, effectively sandwiching yourself as tight as you can between their mass. You whine, and Johnny hums in your ear, soothing you by scenting until you’re letting out little rumbles of your own, soft purrs puffing against Simon’s chest, Johnny’s lips ghosting across your sweat dotted forehead.
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A TRAGEDY THAT'S BUILT ON DESTINY!
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I WOULD CHANGE MOST EVERY SINGLE THING. I WOULD LET YOU KISS ME, KILL ME!
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synopsis// multiple different universes, but one thing remains the same: geto loves you in each and every one of them.
pairing// suguru geto x gn!reader
word count// 5.8k
contents// different universes, angst, satisfying angst?, hurt/no comfort but also hurt/comfort at the same time, ooc geto?, character death tehe
notes// inspired by everything everywhere all at once and the song kiss me kill me by mest :3 i wrote this SOOOO long ago but u have no idea how much i adore this oneshot. like i think it might be my fav oneshot ive ever written. it is everything to me!! and i did not do the idea justice but u get the point!!
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December 24th 
You assume the fight is over because neither you nor Shoko have gotten any more wounded victims. The two of you glance at each other briefly but don’t bother saying anything. What could be said about a full-blown borderline war schemed by your high school best friend and lover? Nothing could possibly be said, so nothing is. The two of you stand there waiting for anything to happen, whether that’s getting called back to Jujutsu High or being brought another victim, and eventually something does happen, and Shoko gets a call. You can’t read her expression for the whole 20 seconds she’s on the phone before she passes it to you. You furrow your eyebrows in question.
“It’s Gojo,” she says blankly before attempting to hand you the phone again.
You hesitate to answer. “Hello?”
“You should get down here,” he says blankly over the phone.
“What? Why? Is everything okay?”
“Um, yeah, just—you know those back alleys by the school?”
“Uh huh?”
“Meet me there.”
“Gojo, you’re kinda scaring me-“
“Y/N, just come; you’ll thank me—I hope.”
You frown and begrudgingly agree, “Okay, fine, yeah, whatever, I'm on my way.”
“Make it quick, alright? I'm serious,” he adds quickly before hanging up.
As you give Shoko her phone back, you roll your eyes at the fact that he didn't even give you a chance to say okay before hanging up.
“What was that about?” she wonders, slipping her phone back into her pocket.
You sigh. “No idea, but he wants me to go meet up with him for some reason.”
Shoko hums curiously. “You should get going then; must be urgent.”
You nod, “Yeah.”
☆。*。☆。☆。*。☆。☆。*。☆。☆。*。☆。☆。
It doesn't take you long to get to the school given how fast you were walking since Gojo told you to hurry it up, the tense anticipation aiding in your speed. It does, however, take you a few moments to find Gojo, but once you do, you find that he's not looking at you, but he’s speaking, and it's not to you either; it's to something—or rather someone—he's blocking with his body.
“Gojo?” you ask once you finally reach him.
Gojo turns to face you, a sorrowful smile on his face, before stepping out of the way to reveal who he was speaking to and the whole reason why he called you here in the first place.
When you see Getou on the ground, your heart sinks into your stomach, and your blood runs cold. You look back at Gojo, who merely shrugs.
“You should say your goodbyes; I already did,” Gojo whispers before leaving you and Getou alone.
Getou lets out a hushed laugh. “That’s a little melodramatic of him, don’t you think?”
The hammering of your heart roaring in your ears makes it difficult to hear what he says. You stand there frozen in what you can only describe as horror as you stare down at Getou, who's missing an arm and is only growing more pale by the second from blood loss.
“Do you plan on ignoring me?” he asks softly, as though he’d understand if that really was your plan.
You blink a few times and shake your head, your tears blurring your vision. “I dont-“ 
Getou hums appreciatively and smiles up at you, which makes you completely break down, a sob racking through your body so violently that the only thing you can do is collapse to your knees. Getou winces as he tries to sit up straighter, as if he’s going to catch you or crawl over to you. You sniffle, your sobbing uncontrollable, as you crawl to him, and once there, you let your head fall upon his blood-stained chest. Getou immediately places his only remaining hand on the back of your head, as if holding it to his chest, and gently pats your head.
“Are you an idiot?” you snap.
“Might be.” 
You sob even harder into his chest. “Why would you do this?”
Your question makes his heart race. “I wanted something better for Jujutsu society.”
You shake your head at him disapprovingly. “Why’d you have to go about it this way?”
“I don’t know Y/N," he sighs. "Does it make a difference?”
You scoff, raising your head to glare at him. “Of course it does, you idiot! You left! and had a hit placed on you! Why couldn’t you have just stayed?” You sob, letting your head fall back onto his chest. “Why couldn’t you have wanted me as much as you wanted this? Why couldn’t... Why couldn’t you have wanted me as much as I wanted you?”
“Y/N,” he coos regretfully, as if he doesn’t know what to say, which he doesn’t. He did want you, and he’d even go as far as saying he wanted a better jujutsu society for you so you wouldn’t have to live your days slaving away for the non-sorcerers. “Y/N, look at me.”
You shake your head and screw your eyes shut, not wanting to look at him. You don’t want to see your first and only love withering away right in front of you.
“Y/N, please look at me.”
“I-I can't."
“Y/N, open your eyes.”
The demandingness dripping from his voice has your head shooting up to look at him and your eyes opening wide, but as you open them, you’re not met with an actively dying Getou; you're met with a sunny and flower-filled meadow? You move to wipe your tears, but your face is dry. You blink a few times, trying to take in your new surroundings, given that a moment ago you were just in a dark alley and now you're sitting on a blanket in a field under a glowing sun.
“Y/N?” Someone speaks from beside you.
Your attention is drawn to the person. “Getou?” 
He smiles at you.
“Getou, where are we?” you ask, now starting to slightly panic.
He looks at you in confusion. “We’re on our date?”
Your chest heaves up and down, and you're more confused than ever. “Huh? But- We-“ 
“We what?” he asks, tilting his head to the side.
“We were just behind Jujutsu High; you were missing your arm, and-"
Getou scoots in closer to you and cradles your face in his hands. The feeling of a warm, full-of-life Getou touching you brings tears to your eyes all over again.
“Woah, woah, love, calm down. What are you talking about? Jujutsu High? Me missing an arm?”
“You don’t remember?” You croak out, distraught, and slightly convinced that you’re going crazy.
“Remember what, love?” he asks softly.
You stare at him in disbelief. “The fight—you wanted a better jujutsu society, and you tried? You lost your arm! You were dying; I saw you! I was there with you! You were covered in blood and-“ 
Getou gently wipes your tears away. “Love, that didn’t happen. I’m here, yeah? and I have both my arms, and there was no fight for Jujutsu society? Whatever that means..."
You blink at him, dumbfounded. “What?” 
“It was probably just a bad dream, Y/N.” He smiles at you reassuringly.
“You don’t know about jujutsu society?”
“Am I supposed to?”
You stare at him in awe. What’s happening? How could he not know about jujutsu society when it was the very thing he was fighting for? But then again, how could he not be missing an arm? And how could the two of you not be in a dark alleyway right now? How could any of this be happening? Maybe he’s right; maybe it really was a bad dream. A very vivid, detailed, lucid, and lifelike bad dream.
“I guess not,” you respond with a frown.
Getou wipes away your last few tears and smiles at you. “You’re okay; I’m okay. We’re okay. It was just a bad dream, love.”
“Yeah,” you say haltingly, "yeah, I guess it was..."
“Are you okay now?”
You nod as you take one of his hands off your face and into your own. “Yeah, I think so... Um, where are we, Getou?”
“On our weekly date?” He answers curiously as he removes his other hand from your face.
You look around at your surroundings curiously. “In the middle of a forest?”
“This is your favorite place, Y/N,” he says, quizically.
As you take another glance around, you hum, not necessarily agreeing or disagreeing. “I can see why; it’s beautiful here.”
He raises his free hand and grips your jaw, forcing you to look at him. “Y/N, are you okay? How come you don't remember?”
You look into his eyes, and something doesn't feel right—as if you're not meant to be here—but you digress and shrug anyway. “I don't know...”
He frowns briefly before leaning in and giving you a quick peck on the lips, and you practically melt, having not felt his lips on yours for far too long.
“That's alright. We can still make the most of the rest of our day, right?”
You nod, and he smiles at your response, letting go of your face and hand to open his arms to you, inviting you into his embrace. You return the smile before laying yourself in his arms, trying to ignore the rising feeling that something is wrong, but you can't because the minute your head touches his chest, you're thrown into a moment, a memory, a dream? where you're back in the alley with your head on a bleeding-out Getou, and it's just for a split second, a flash in time, but it's enough to make you go stiff and your breath hitch.
Getou rubs his hand down your back soothingly. “Hey, what's wrong?”
You swallow harshly and try to concentrate on the green scenery in front of you rather than whatever you keep seeing. “Nothing, I'm fine. It's fine.”
Getou places his head on top of yours. “Are you sure?”
You nod. “I am.”
He hums disapprovingly but doesn't press the issue any further; instead, he just runs his hand up and down your spine in an attempt to calm you down, which works as you begin to relax into his embrace and regain control of your breathing.
“What do we usually do here?” you ask, breaking the silence.
He shrugs. “Usually just talk about our days, our future plans, and stuff like that.”
You hum. “Is it nice?”
“Very nice; I like spending our days together.”
“I do too,” you correct yourself, “or I'm sure I did too.”
Getou doesn't say anything; instead, he lays himself down and, since he's holding you, takes you with him. You sigh contentedly and let your eyes flutter close, the sun and his hold keeping you warm. Suddenly, even with your eyes closed, you can tell it's getting brighter outside, and you groan. You’re about to ask what's up with the sun when a shooting pain in your head causes you to wince. Your heartbeat rings in your ears, and you can feel your hands grow clammy.
You feel unstable, as if you're no longer on the ground being held, as if you're floating through time and space, and the uncertainty forces your eyes open, but you're not met with anything—no, that's not right, you're met with everything, glimpses of time that you can barely make out. One moment you see Getou at an alter, and then you see you and Getou nodding to each other in determination, and the next glimpse is of you, Getou, Gojo, and Shoko laughing about something before you’re hit with another shooting pain in your head. Screwing your eyes shut, you hiss in pain, and all too suddenly, you're back on stable ground, no longer floating, and the brightness you could see through closed eyes a moment ago is gone.
You still hesitate to open your eyes, unsure of what you'll see, but when you can just barely make out that you're not where you were before, your eyes shoot open. You're now standing in the doorway of what appears to be the room of two teen girls, and Getou is sitting at a vanity staring at you; his hair and make-up are done, and he's frowning. Despite your confusion about where you are, you can't help but burst out into a fit of laughter.
He sighs and rolls his eyes. “Oh haha, yeah, keep laughing.”
You slap your hand over your mouth in an attempt to stifle your laughter. “What happened?”
He crosses his arms over his chest and looks away, mumbling, “Our daughters thought I would make a very good model, apparently.”
You go to laugh again, but it hits you, and you look at him like he's crazy. “Sorry, daughters?”
He returns the look. “Yes? Our kids?”
You look away, muttering to yourself, “We have kids...”
You didn't mean for him to hear it, but he does anyway and instantly stands up and makes his way toward you. He grabs your shoulders, drawing your attention to him, and when you look at him, he's staring back at you in concern.
“Y/N, are you okay?”
You want to take him seriously, but truthfully, you can't when he’s wearing bright pink lipstick and bright pink eyeshadow. He does look cute, though. You try to bite back a smile.
“I'm sorry, but I can't take you seriously when you look like that.”
Getou sighs. “I know I look amazing. Can you try to ignore my beauty for like five seconds and tell me why you’re acting like you don't remember our kids?”
You frown. What are you supposed to tell him? That you're apparently having nightmares upon nightmares about different lives with him? And now you're not sure what's real and what's not? You can't say that, so instead you shrug and merely mutter, “You do look amazing like that, though.”
His head drops to the side at the same moment that his smile fades. “Y/N.”
“I don't know.”
“You don't know?”
“Some really weird shit is going on, Getou,” you breathe out heavily.
He doesn’t say anything, instead grabbing your hand and leading you to one of your apparent kids' beds, where he sits you down.
“What’s going on?”
“I don't know, and you wouldn't know either so,” you explain vaguely in frustration.
He gives your hand a squeeze. “Maybe I would?”
You shake your head. “I don’t wanna waste time on that; I don't know how long I have here.”
“What?” he asks blankly. “What do you mean you ‘don't know how long you have here’?”
“Getou,” you whine, not wanting to think or talk about it because you wouldn't even know where to start; all you want is to learn about this new nightmare and what it holds.
He relents. “Okay, I won't ask.”
You smile at him and let a moment of silence pass before asking, “What are they like?”
“Huh?”
“Our kids—daughters.”
Getou hums. “They’re great; we raised them well.”
“They are especially great at making you a model, huh?” you snicker. 
He laughs and rolls his eyes. “Oh whatever, you're just jealous they never make you model.”
You shrug. “What are their names?”
“Well, we were gonna keep the names they had when we adopted them, but they ended up not having any names at all, so we settled on Nanako and Mimiko.”
You stare at him in awe. “Did you pick the names out?”
“We both did,” he recalls fondly and vividly, as if it were just yesterday that the two of you were picking out names.
“And we are...?”
He kisses your cheek before answering, “Married—we’re married.”
You hum and raise your left hand, your gaze fixed on your ring finger. “I don't see a ring?”
He hums curiously. “You were wearing it this morning? Maybe you dropped it somewhere?”
You nod. “Yeah.. Maybe..”
Getou doesn’t say anything; he doesn’t know what to say. What could he? His partner of multiple years suddenly has some form of amnesia and can't remember that they have kids, let alone that they’re married to him. You turn to face Getou. He looks like Getou—like the Getou you know, who apparently was merely a nightmare. Besides all the makeup and stuff, he looks like Getou. He says he’s Getou, but something just feels off.
“Are you real?”
He nods. “Very real.”
You look around the room, taking in the messy vanities, the messy beds, and the drawers stuffed with clothes. “Are our kids real?”
“Extremely real.”
You study his face for any hint of uncertainty, and when you find none, you ask, “Am I real?”
He narrows his eyes at you and hums curiously. letting go of your hand only to bring both hands up to your face and start smooshing your face together, pushing and pulling at the flesh on your cheeks.
“Getou,” you mumble.
He hums approvingly and nods, letting his hands fall back to his sides. “Yep, you’re real.”
You smile at his idiotic antics but appreciate them nonetheless. And although you can touch him and feel him, and he is real, as are you and your kids, it still doesn't seem real. And then, all too suddenly, your head starts throbbing again.
“Fuck no, not again,“ you panic.
“Y/N? whats wrong-“
You can't hear what he’s saying anymore; it's like you've gone underwater and he's speaking to you from the surface. Another shooting pain in your head has your eyes screwing shut, and you know you're fucked when all you can hear is your heartbeat ringing in your ears and feel your hands grow clammy all over again. You’re back to feeling unstable, drifting between time and space once more, and just like last time, the uncertainty of the feeling forces your eyes open, and you're faced with everything again—more glimpses in time that you can barely make out.
One moment you think you see yourself back at the beginning on Getou’s cold chest, and then you see yourself and Getou covered in blood, and you're not sure if it's yours or someone else's, and the next glimpse you see is of Getou on your cold chest, like your roles had been reversed, before you’re hit with another shooting pain in your head. Screwing your eyes shut, you wince in pain, and finally you're back on solid ground again, no longer floating, and the brightness you could see through closed eyes a moment ago is gone. This time you don't hesitate to open your eyes, and you find yourself in a cemetery.
You look around curiously, trying to assess your surroundings while simultaneously trying to recover from whatever just happened. But you're starting to realize something now. All of this is real. You laying on Getou’s chest was real; having a picnic with a perfectly fine Getou in a world where curses apparently don't exist was real; having kids and marrying Getou was real; and all of those little bits of time in between each new life were real. All of it was real—is real; all of it happened—is happening; it just didn't happen to you specifically. Not this version of you, at least. You’ve realized that you’re experiencing different universes and living alternate lives of your own. You didn’t think alternate universes existed, but it's not too hard to accept when the world you live in—the world you belong to—is riddled with curses and sorcerers. You are not above believing in alternate dimensions.
Finally over your sudden epiphany, you're able to realize that you weren't immediately met with Getou like you had been the past two times you got transported into another dimension. As you put the pieces together, a grave feeling washes over you—no Getou, and you’re in a cemetery. You swallow harshly.
No, no, no.
You start running around the cemetery, inspecting each and every headstone, and praying to the universe(s) that you aren't about to find one that reads his name.
No, no, no.
You keep running, the cemetery seemingly interminable, until you run up behind someone who looks suspiciously a lot like Getou, and when you hear him murmur under his breath, you sigh heavily in relief that it is him, but why is he here? You tilt your head and try to look around him to read the gravestone.
“What the fuck?” you exclaim, stunned.
Getou spins around faster than you can even blink, and he almost chokes on his spit. “Y/N?” His chest heaves up and down as he shifts his gaze between you and the gravestone. “But-but-how-you’re-“
“Dead apparently,” you say, finishing his sentence as you stare at the gravestone that reads, "HERE LIES L/N Y/N."
He stares at you, completely bewildered, and you can see him trembling. “How—how are you here?”
Will something bad happen if you tell him this isn't your universe and there are actually multiple universes out there? Who knows, but you’re about to find out.
“I'm not, well, I'm not supposed to be.”
He shakes his head and closes his eyes. “I'm just hallucinating; you’re not real.”
His reply breaks your heart. “I am real.”
“You’re not.”
You step forward, taking his hand in yours. “I am.”
He finally opens his eyes back up, and he stares at you through tears, completely amazed that you're here, that you're actually touching him, and that you're actually alive and real.
“I don't—I dont understand—you're dead!” He stammers, yanking his hand from yours, and as he breaks out into full-on sobs at this point, he’s reminding you an awful lot of yourself in your own world.
You nod slowly. “In this universe, it seems so... how?”
“What?” he stutters. “This universe?”
You ignore his question. “How did I die, Getou?”
He shakes his head sternly. “No, I'm not saying anything until you explain what you meant. What if you’re a curse? What if I cursed you, holy fuck? Fuck!”
“Okay, curses still exist in this universe; good to know,” you acknowledge with a nod.
Getou snaps, “What are you talking about!?”
You flinch, which only makes him sob harder.
“I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap—I'm just so fucking confused; you're supposed to be dead,” he bawls as he falls to his knees.
You take another step closer and kneel down, drawing him into your embrace and letting him sob into your chest for as long as he needs, ignoring the horrible feeling of deja vu crawling all over you like worms.
“Shh, you're okay,” you whisper, soothingly brushing your fingers through his hair.
He finally starts to calm down after a few more minutes of whispering sweet nothings to him, and once he’s no longer sobbing, he pulls away.
“Answer my question, and I'll answer yours,” he says through sniffles.
You nod. 
“What were you talking about, universes? How are you here, Y/N? You’re dead—or you’re supposed to be...”
“Do you believe in alternate or multiple universes?”
He shrugs and wipes away any remaining tears. “I don't know; I never really thought about it.”
You hum and nod. “Right, so, uh, they exist! There are a lot of universes out there, actually." You let out an uneasy laugh.
He stares at you curiously.
“Obviously, I'm not from this universe.”
He continues staring at you.
“Oh, cmon, curses exist, but you draw the line at alternate dimensions?”
Getou frowns and says, “I guess you’re right... So you’re from a ‘different dimension’?”
You point a finger at him, narrowing your eyes. “Don't air-quote me like you don't believe me; how else would I be here right now if I were supposedly dead?”
“I don't know; that's what I'm trying to figure out!” he exclaims, gesticulating wildly.
“Can you just humor me and hear me out?”
He takes a deep breath before ultimately agreeing, “Okay, fine.”
You clasp your hands together. “Okay, um, in my universe, you’re dead.”
“What?!”
You shake your hands and your head. “Ok, no wait! You’re not dead yet, but, uh, you were like on the verge of death when I got put into another universe.”
He looks at you in disbelief. “And you just left me?!”
“It wasn't on purpose! Why would I want to leave you when you’re dying? I don't know how I ended up here! or in the last two other universes!”
He stops you and asks, "Okay, okay, wait—how am I dying?”
You look away awkwardly. “You wanted to change jujutsu society in… a not-so-friendly way... And, um, you were willing to die for your cause.”
“I'm dying the same way you did?”
You return your attention to him. “What?”
Getou nods. “Yeah.”
You shake your head. “What do you mean you're dying the same way I did?”
“In this universe, you’re the one who wanted to change jujutsu society in a... not-so-friendly way,” he explains sheepishly.
“Holy shit,” you mutter to yourself.
He nods again. “So, in yours, our roles are reversed.”
“And I'm dead already? I didn't even last as long as you?”
“Well, yeah, I guess," he shrugs, "but it worked; there hasn't been a curse, at least not a special-grade one, since you died." His eyes gleam as he looks up at you. “Did I succeed?”
You bite the inside of your cheek anxiously and shake your head.
“I'm dying for nothing, then?”
You look away and mumble, “My Getou is okay with it; he knew he might fail—he knew Gojo was the only one who could probably change anything—but he still wanted to try.”
“Okay, well, this—” he gestures to himself, “Getou isn't okay with it.”
You roll your eyes. “Yes, well, you’re also still alive, so it doesn't really affect you that much, now does it?”
“Still! You just told me one version of myself is dead—or dying—and I'm supposed to be chill with that?”
You stare at him blankly. “Your version of me is dead.”
Getou grows quiet, and you can almost physically see how his demeanor wilts away.
“Sorry.”
“It's fine,” he says, shaking his head. “You said you were in two other universes before this one, right?”
You nod. 
“What were they like?”
You smile as you think back on the previous universes: “We were both alive and happy, and we were together in them.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah... and curses didn't exist either.”
“Huh,” he says ambivalently, like he's not sure whether to be happy for his other selves or be bitter that that isn't him. “Tell me more?”
“In the first one, we were actually on a date in some forest that I apparently loved.”
He stares at you wide-eyed, completely engrossed in your retellings.
“In the second one, we were married.”
A smile tugs at his lips. “Really?”
You nod. “We even adopted two daughters.”
“What were they like?” he wonders, enamored by some alternate universe of you two.
“I'm not sure; I didn't get to meet them,” you confess meekly. “But I know their names were Nanako and Mimiko, and they loved doing your hair and makeup. You adored them, and I'm sure I adored them too.”
He nods wistfully. “In your universe, were... were we together?”
“For a bit.” You look away sadly. “We broke up when you, uh, went off and wanted to-“
“Change jujutsu society,” he chimes in.
“Yeah... How'd you-“
“Same thing here, just roles reversed, remember?” He laughs sadly.
You nod. “Did you still love me? even after I'd gone off and did what I did?”
“I did. I do,” he quickly corrects himself. “Did you?”
“I still do.”
The two of you sit looking away from each other in glum silence. It's hard to stay upbeat about your happy alternate selves when your actual selves are currently dying or dead.
“Kinda feels like we got the short end of the stick, don't you think?” Getou mumbles softly.
“Huh?”
“Well, I mean, there are no curses in those universes, and we’re both alive and happy, but in ours we’re dead?” he elaborates.  
You nod reluctantly. “Well yeah, but I don't know; I guess it's kinda nice to know that it worked out in at least one universe.”
“Don't you wish it worked out in ours?”
“Of course I do, Getou; what kind of question is that?" you scoff. "You think I want to go back to my universe just to watch you die?”
“Well,” Getou pauses, turning to face you, “what if you don't go back?”
Your gaze zeroes in on his. “What?”
“What if you stay?…”
You abruptly stand up and chuckle uncomfortably. “Getou-“ your sentence is cut short by an echo of your name that only you seem to hear because you're the only one gazing in the general direction it seemed like it came from.
Getou joins you on your feet and follows your stare, but when he realizes you aren't staring at anything, he returns his sight to you.
“Think about it.”
His voice snaps you out of your trance, and you look back at him with a small frown.
“I'm practically dead in your universe, and you're dead in mine, but we’re together right now!" he says, taking your hand in his. "Maybe the universe put you into mine for a reason— so we don't have to go back to one where we’re not together…”
You struggle to swallow; your mouth suddenly goes dry as Getou stares at you in full, unadulterated hope, and you can't bring yourself to say anything to crush that.
“Y/N, wouldn't that be nice?”
You nod and murmur, “It would.”
“Then?” he asks expectantly.
Someone calling out your name echoes in your head again, and you quickly look down the street to now see a small, bright light in the distance, and you know your time here is soon coming to an end.
“I... I can't stay, Getou.”
His voice cracks as he panickedly asks, “Why?”
"Because,” you explain with a shake of your head, “I'm not your Y/N, and you're not my Getou.”
“I could be,” he says confidently, or he would have if it weren't for the way his voice trembled.
Your vision goes blurry from the tears welling up in your eyes as you shake your head.
“We could try!”
You sniffle and reiterate, “I can't stay.”
“Please,” he begs through his sobs. “Please, we can make it work.”
You look away from him, trying to fight back your tears, but it's futile; you’re a complete mess, just like he is now. “No.”
His hands shake as he grips your face and forces you to look at him. “Y/N, please, I'm begging you.”
“I cant.”
“Don't leave me again.”
The same voice calling out your name echoes in your head again, this time louder, and the bright light is getting bigger and closer.
“I don't want to go back to a universe where you’re just gonna leave me either, but,” you sob, weakly clinging onto the wrists of his hands that are still on your face.
“So stay.”
You shake your head and take his hands off your face. “I won't.”
Getou’s head goes limp and drops as sobs shake his entire body, and you can't help but think that's exactly how you'll look when you return to your universe and have to deal with the death of your Getou.
“Please,” he pleads.
You're both in tears as you lift his head up by his chin to look at you. The voice calling your name echoes even louder, and the bright light is getting closer by the second.
“You’re not my Getou, and I'm not your Y/N.”
He nods reluctantly. “I know, but...“
The bright light is only a few feet away at this point, and the voice echoing in your head is so loud that it's giving you a migraine—you know this is your last few minutes, if that, in this universe, so you lean in and take Getou’s lips into yours—a goodbye kiss for a Getou who you'll never see again, a goodbye kiss for a Getou who desperately needs one when he never got one from his y/n. You pull away and cradle his cheek gently.
“I have to go say goodbye to my Getou now; I think he’s waiting for me.”
He nods. “If he’s anything like me, he’ll want a goodbye kiss too.”
A faint smile tugs at your lips. “I know.”
Getou doesn't get the chance to respond when you're suddenly gone—completely vanished right before his eyes.
You, on the other hand, are back again, feeling unstable as you float through time and space, and again, the uncertainity of the feeling forces your eyes open, but this time you're met with only one thing—the image of you on your Getou’s chest. With every passing second, it grows closer, as does his voice calling out for you, and before you know it, you're back in your body, looking up at him with a gasp.
“Y/N?” he asks weakly.
You're still in tears from the previous universe as you now pull him into your embrace.
He winces, and you quickly let go of him. “Sorry.”
He smiles at you with blood in his mouth and teeth. “It's okay.”
You have to force yourself to look away to try and choke back a sob, but Getou notices immediately and slowly lifts up his remaining hand to cradle your cheek.
“It’s okay, Y/N.”
You nod. “I know.”
“You’ll be okay.”
“I know,” you croak out.
“Kiss me?” He asks out of breath, knowing he doesn't have much longer.
You don't hesitate to lean in and kiss him, ignoring how it tastes like blood and tears as well as how cold his lips feel. You ignore it because he's kissing you back. He’s kissing you with all the power his frail body can muster, and it makes up for all the years, months, weeks, days, minutes, and seconds that your lips haven’t touched. But just as quickly as he kisses you, he stops, but it's gradual; he gradually stops kissing, moving, and breathing. It doesn't take long for it to get to that point, and even when he's not kissing back, you still kiss him with some fairy-tale hope that it will bring him back, that your kiss will somehow save him, like he's Snow White and you're Prince Charming. But it doesn't.
It doesnt.
You pull away to look at Getou, whose eyes are glazed over but not closed. You sob as you reach up to close his eyes, only to let your head fall against his chest. He’s so cold. Too cold. That's why you have to stay there on top of him to keep him warm. You'll stay there all night if you have to. But you don't even get the chance to stay there for longer than a few minutes when someone suddenly pulls you off of him, and you look over your shoulder to see Gojo, who's crying as well.
“He’s gone, Y/N.”
"I know," you sniffle, “I know.”
Gojo helps you up to your feet, his hand on your waist to keep you steady as he leads you away from Getou’s body. The further you get from it, the harder you cry.
But it's okay. It’ll be okay because, even though you lost Getou in this universe, you’ll eventually be able to come to peace with it knowing that in a hundred, a thousand, and even a million other universes, you and Getou are living happily ever after.
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©TODAYISAWTHEWHXLEWXRLD
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runningfrom2am · 5 months
Note
Hi, how’s your day been going? Hoping it was amazing. I just saw your post about needing inspo for Coriolanus fics! I’m not sure if you are taking requests but if you are Could you maybe do a touch-starved Coryo fic? Something fluffy/angsty where Coryo can finally fulfill those needs and be himself and vulnerable with the reader. Thanks!
as long as you need me - c.s
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pairing: coryo x fem!reader
wc: 1.7k
tags/warnings: fluff, hurt/comfort, he just needs you and you just want to help.
requests (currently closed- feel free to send whatever but it will be a while before I get to them!)
nav / coriolanus snow masterlist
a/n: ahhh thank you for sending this in! it was so fun to write like stopppp i just want to give him a hug omg. also thought i'd post this to hold y'all off until i post the next part of LTPF. anyway, enjoy!
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You had a very stable grasp of the limits of your relationship. What was appropriate, and what was not. You were quite shy, and Coryo always carried himself with a high level of decorum. You would eat together at lunch, and he would walk you home most days. The weekends, your study dates, were always your favourite. He was significantly more relaxed, but you could still tell he was just a little tightly wound. By now, you've just learned that's who he is. Not overly affectionate, but he cares for you and you care for him. 
"I can't stay late today, I'm sorry." You said, genuinely feeling bad for having to turn down the request. In your junior year, you started tutoring for younger grades at the academy and it is something you thoroughly enjoyed.
"I have a test tomorrow! Why can't you stay? Just for a few minutes- I just have a couple of questions." The first year, Aelia whined.
"My boyfriend is supposed to walk me home and he has a tight schedule, but I'll tell you what, I can meet you in the library in the morning before class. That way it will still be fresh in your mind, yeah?" You grinned, and she seemed satisfied as you agreed on a time, not knowing that a few of the girls in your grade were listening in.
"Y/N," Clemensia decided to approach you as Aelia walked off, Arachne and Livia following close behind. "Did I catch you telling someone that you have a boyfriend? Did I hear that right?"
"Oh, well, yes." You answered sheepishly, gathering your things to put in your bag before your next class.
"Really?" Livia chimed in, and you just nodded. "Okay, well, spill. Who is it? Do I know him?"
"Um..." You looked around, deciding what to say. You weren't necessarily keeping it a secret, but you just hadn't felt the need to tell anyone you went to school with. "It's Coriolanus. Snow." You cleared your throat, unsure why you even added his last name. It's not like the name Coriolanus was abundantly common.
"Shut up." Clemensia laughed slightly, eyes widening at you. "You're joking, right?"
"No... We've been together for almost seven months now."
"I just... wow. We had no idea. Seven months! I feel like I've never seen the two of you get closer than two feet apart." You weren't sure whether to interpret this response as teasing or genuine shock- so you just gave them an awkward smile and a small nod before walking away.
At the time, you had never considered how your lack of affection in public could be confusing to people- not that it mattered. Rumors had spread quickly after that, which was to be expected when Livia and Arachne were involved. However, PDA just wasn't your thing. General displays of affection weren't really your thing, either. Both of you always had a lot going on, and having been together for almost a year by now, you knew that you loved him and he loved you. You didn't have to prove it to each other or to anyone, there was no pressure for anything to change. On your end, anyway.
Coryo, on the other hand, was feeling something shift. Leading up to the reaping and more importantly, to the prize. You both were in the running, being in the top twenty-four of your class, and you had no doubt that Coryo was a shoo-in, but you didn't know how extremely anxious it was making him. The now constant thrumming of his heartbeat in his chest and his shaky hands were always less around you, and he can only dream of how much better it would be if he could just hold you.
These days, he'd wake up expecting you in his arms due to a particularly calming dream only to be disappointed. He respected you a great amount and wouldn't want to push your boundaries, however unspoken. Still, he wasn't sure how much longer he could go about his day-to-day without testing his theory that holding you could cure his fears, or at least let him forget about them for only a moment. He would happily take just a second of peace.
Coriolanus usually greeted you outside of your unshared classes, seeing that you tended to stay a few minutes late to ask questions or polish off your notes. He couldn't wait to see you, he needed to.
"Coryo." You smile, walking out of your lecture hall to see him waiting.
"Hi, Love. How was class?" Your boyfriend greets you, joining you on your walk towards the exit of the school.
"It was good. Though, I find the topic of the rebellion kind of redundant at this point." You say, books tucked against your chest under folded arms. "Is it not too soon to discuss it in a history class? I mean, I literally remember what it was like to live in a bomb shelter."
Your joke seemingly lands on deaf ears as he just hums, placing a hand on your lower back to guide you out of the building. This wasn't totally unusual, but with the way he was pushing you, albeit gently, was telling you that something was wrong.
"Is everything okay?" You ask him, looking up at the boy next to you as you reach the bottom of the academy's front steps.
"Fine." Coryo nods, attempting a reassuring smile that he isn't aware falls short.
"Okay, well... If you want to talk about anything, I'm here for you, you know. Always."
"I know. Thank you, Love." He drops his hand from your back to hold your free one, turning in the direction of your apartment.
The next afternoon, you're in the same class, one of the rare ones you don't share with Coryo, taking down notes from the lecture when there's a knock on the door, followed by it creaking open. You pay no mind, taking the opportunity to catch up on everything written on the board.
"May I borrow Y/N, please?" Your boyfriend's voice is scratchy and shakey in a way unfamiliar sounding to you, making your head snap up. You'd never seen him cry before. "Only for a moment."
Your teacher dismisses you, likely on account of your and Coriolanus's mutually spotless records and his red-rimmed eyes. Clearly, you were needed urgently. You leave your bag and your books, ignoring the whistles and heckling of some of your classmates as you rush to the door.
Coryo had reached his breaking point. He was writing his third paper of the week, unable to focus on that and get his mind off of how unlikely it was he would get the prize if the Dean had any say. Sitting in the library, the world had started turning around him. People were talking, laughing, even, and he couldn't take it anymore. The floodgates opened and he had rushed out of the room. He couldn't go home, his attendance would be affected and he'd be throwing away the prize most definitely. He had nowhere to go, except for to you.
You close the door behind yourself, thankful that the hallway is completely deserted during class time. "Hey, what's going on?" You ask, and before you can get a good look at him he's pulling you into a crushing hug, shaking around you.
You're shocked for a moment, pulling yourself out of your head to hug him back. Whatever is bothering him must be bad. He'd hugged you before, but never like this. "Hey, it's okay..." You whisper, rubbing his back. "Let's go outside for a second, yeah? Get some air?" You offer, gently prying yourself from his grasp to look at him.
Coryo can't speak, overtaken completely by the tears flowing down his cheeks and the anxiety flooding every inch of his body. He feels like he could be sick, all he knew that he needed was you. He just nods, trying to regain his composure, if only for the couple of minutes it takes to get outside.
"Okay. Let's go." You smile, trying not to show how worried you are as you wrap an arm around his back, still holding him close to you as if he has a broken ankle and you have to carry him. So far, his theory was proving to be correct. Just having you at his side was calming to him, and mentally he's cursing himself for not voicing his fears to you before they broke him.
As soon as the door of the rarely used back exit to the school is closed, he's essentially collapsing onto the ground, tucking his knees up to his chest and crying into his hands. You're quick to join him, draping an arm over his back and trying to grab one of his hands to hold. Your brow is knit with worry, rubbing his shoulder as he allows you to take one of his shaking hands. "Coryo..." You say softly, trying to get him to look at you but he won't. "What's happening? Talk to me, you can trust me. I just want to help."
He sniffles, looking up at you. "What is it?" You ask again, hoping to prompt any kind of information out of him. When he doesn't answer, you curve your approach to yes or no questions, hopefully, to make it easier on him. "Is someone hurt? Is it Grandma'am? Did something happen?"
He shakes his head slightly with every question, once again avoiding your eyes as he looks down at the ground, occasionally trying to cough out the knot in his throat.
"...Do you want to talk? Or do you just need a hug?" You realize, leaning in so he would look at you again.
He pulls you closer, wrapping both his arms around you awkwardly due to the way you are both sitting. "Just need you here." He mumbles, hardly audible as he buries his face in your shoulder and neck.
Relieved to hear his voice again, you place a hand on his hair and on his back, holding him tight. "I'm here, Coryo. As long as you need me."
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harunayuuka2060 · 4 months
Text
MC: I kinda admire those children with strict parents who became rebellious.
MC: Like, I'm so proud they turned out that way.
Trey: I hope you don't mind me asking. But why?
Cater: MC became a doormat.
MC: Yes.
Trey: ...
Trey: Oh, dear. Are you alright?
MC: Well, yeah?
Cater: Saying "yeah" and "fine" are the only answers we know. Right, bestie?
MC: *satisfied smile* Yes.
Trey: ...
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mauvecherie-writes · 8 months
Text
Meritorious.
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pairing: lewis hamilton x f!black reader
summary: lewis drove his ass off and just wanted to appreciate that. takes place after the Hungarian GP 2023.
themes/warning: 18+ nsfw, minors dni, pwp, oral sex (male receiving), humping.
word count: 3.36K
note: as you can tell, I’ve not been in the writing spirit. Just lost a lot of motivation for writing lately and it’s been hard getting back into that mindset but I’m trying. Sorry for the inactivity and I hope you like this.
Today was one of those rare days where Lewis left immediately after all of his duties at the track had been handled. His cheeks had begun to itch from holding up his smile - the mask had slowly begun to slip. He couldn’t expose his true emotions to the team at that moment. The frustrations that he was juggling within him were not theirs to be burdened with, he’d have to talk with Toto and the seniors tomorrow.
All he knew was that he just needed to leave the track as soon as possible. But never without saying goodbye to the fans who had diligently waited for him. However, nearing his awaiting car, he saw you standing by the back doors. Your honey blonde French curl braids framed your face as your sunglasses protected your sweet eyes from the rays of the sun. The cream, linen summer dress fell perfectly on your body - contrasting your beautiful deep brown skin.
Seeing you in all of your ethereal glory, lifted a weight from his chest.
And then you smiled at him.
Lewis could feel his heart begin to beat faster.
As he encroached closer, you began to hop on your feet before rushing to meet him halfway. You opened your arms and he melted into your body. The both of you held onto each other as your fingers soothingly caressed the back of his neck and your lips pressed soft kisses on the side of his head. Your actions brought him much comfort and cocooned him in your warmth.
You slightly pulled away and cupped his face into your hands and the pad of your thumbs softly rubbed his cheeks as you brought him forward to meet your kisses. He breathed you in as you left many pecks on his lips, his hands falling naturally onto the curve of your back - bringing you further into his body.
“One to ten?” You softly asked as you wiped your lipgloss away from his lips.
“Was at a five but seeing you has brought it up to a good seven point five.” He smiled with his head slightly tilted to the side as the wrinkles in the corners of his eyes made an appearance on his face.
You rolled your eyes behind your sunglasses but failed to stop a grin from being drawn on your face. “Ever the flatterer.” You mumbled before kissing him once more. “Let’s get you out of here.” You whispered before taking his hand and turning to walk towards the truck.
Back at the hotel room, Lewis was settled in bed with his back leaning against the headboard as he mindlessly scrolled on his phone as he waited for you to finish freshening up in the bathroom. It wasn’t long after that you entered into the main room with your silk robe tightly secured around your body.
He watched as you stood by the mirror as you fixed your bonnet, making sure that it was secure. A small smile appeared on his face as he observed you fiddling with the material until you were satisfied.
“Did the food come?” You asked as you turned around, facing Lewis.
“Yeah but I’m not hungry.” He mumbled as an answer, putting his phone on the side table and then shifting back into his previous position. You pouted at him before you crawled onto the bed and then onto Lewis’s lap. Both of your thighs were on either side of his body before you leaned backwards to put most of your weight on his legs.
“Talk to me babe.” You urged him. “What’s going on in that head of yours. You’ve been too quiet.”
He played with the hem of your robe, tugging on it softly, exposing more of your flesh for him to trace patterns on.
“I don’t know, it’s been such a crashing reality you know? No matter what I’m doing, how hard I push, that place I was in before is not coming back. Or at least coming back fast enough for me.”
You nodded your head, signalling for him to continue.
“Our car is shit. Like disgustingly terrible and I’m struggling to connect with it. We’ll have good sessions and good races where I’m thinking, ‘okay this is it. We’re finally finding our footing.’ But then we get pushed ten steps back and we’re back to square one.”
“Awe baby,”
“I just.” He sighed. “I wish they had just listened to me. It went in one ear and out the other.”
“You know what Toto and the others are like. They didn’t want to admit they were wrong. It’s a very hard thing to accept defeat when you’ve been winning for so long. They’re not like you babe. Failure is a thing very hard to be gracious about for those folks.” The last part of your statement caused him to chuckle.
“You can say white people you know. You don’t need to sugarcoat it.” He said as he tugged your robe loose, letting the tie fall to the sides of your body.
“They’re like your family. I didn’t want it to come off as an insult more than an observation .” You shrugged, your fingers reaching to his necklace and rubbing on the diamonds encrusted into the chain.
“It’s the truth though.” He chuckled.
“You’re right, you’re right. But! Coming back to this, I need you to hear me right now. The fall was unfortunately and inevitably going to happen. It was an orchestrated attack, yes but it came and you handled it the best ever way that you could in that moment. We’re not going to be back where we need to be immediately with the politics of the game as they currently stand but believe me when I say your time is coming. Like a phoenix, you’re gonna rise up and you’re gonna show everybody why you’re the best to ever do it. Nothing can stop and nothing won’t stop you, why? Because you’re the hungriest you’ve ever been. I can see it in your eyes - that fire is burning within you.”
“It is.” He confirmed. You smiled down at him as you cupped his face and stroked his cheeks.
“I know it sounds repetitive because you’ve probably been telling yourself the same thing but you will be rewarded for your patience. It’s not coming when you want it but it will be coming, I promise you.” You spoke as you looked directly into his eyes before leaning down and pulling his face upwards into a sweet kiss. Lewis hummed softly into your mouth as his hands settled at your waist.
“Thank you, I needed to hear that.” He mumbled as he broke the kiss.
“Always baby.” You pecked his lips.
“Now onto something else ..” Your hands began to trail down his naked chest before settling on the hem of his boxers. At the feel of your touch, Lewis’s stomach contracted as his dick twitched beneath the fabric. He loved and hated how quickly your touch brought a reaction out of him.
“And what’s that?” He questioned as his eyes closed as your lips touched the skin under his chin before moving down his jawline and finally onto his shoulder.
“You were a fucking beast this weekend and I couldn’t help but be turned on by that. That pole qualifying lap? I’ve watched it more than once already.” You whispered into his ear after scrapping your teeth against his lobe.
“Oh that turned you on did it?” He smirked questioning you playfully because he knew just how his driving made you feel.
“Mhm.” You nodded your head as you continued to place your lips on any inch of skin that you could. “Everything you do turns me on.”
“Shit.” Lewis hissed as you licked his nipple. “So what are you gonna do about that? Since you’re so turned on.” He egged you.
You pulled back and looked directly into his eyes before snaking your body down the length of his, inching towards his legs.
“I’m gonna suck your dick so good baby, I’m going to have you counting stars.”
“I like the sound of that.” He licked his lips as he leaned back against the headboard. His eyes trailed across your body as you slid your robe off from your shoulders. The straps of your babydoll had gone down your shoulders along with your robe but neither of you particularly cared especially when you were tagging on his boxer briefs and pulling them down his legs.
You loved when you were able to tease him. Placing the softest kisses onto the sensitive skin around his cock without giving him the attention that he desperately wanted from you.
“You know that watching you drive has always turned me on. But something about this weekend had really riled me up and all I could think about was sucking your dick in your suit. But this will have to do.”
“Fuck.” Lewis sighed as you finally laid your tongue upon the underside of his cock. His eyes closed as the sensation of your tongue tracing the veins of his dick. “I fucking hate it when you tease me darling. I just want to feel your mouth around me.”
You giggled as you cupped his balls in your palm before kissing his weeping tip. “But you love doing it to me. You love teasing and edging me until I lose all my senses but when it’s the other way around, you can’t take it.”
Through your bonnet, Lewis had managed to grasp onto your braids hard enough to pull your head away. You gasped as you looked into his eyes with your mouth slightly parted, saliva pooling on your tongue.
“Any other day, I would have let you tease me but right now I don’t need that, you either suck my dick and go wild or I fuck your mouth until I’m satisfied. You choose.” The last part of his sentence came with a deep rasp and your panties were soaked. Your heavy breathing was in sync with his heaving chest.
“Yes, sir.” You mumbled.
“Good. Now, open wide.”
Holding onto the base of his length, he breached his tip past your lips and then you immediately took over - moving his hand away, you took as much of his dick into your mouth until he hit the back of your throat. The intrusion made you gag but you took it like a champ and slid your tongue alongside his cock.
The move made a low grumble escape from him but you weren’t letting up. You quickly picked up your pace, getting his dick nice and wet with your spit. Lewis averted his eyes back down to you as you expertly moved your mouth. You were so warm and wet - not comparable to your pussy but the way your tongue tickles the underside of his sensitive tip.
Once he sagged back into the bed, did you finally pick up your pace. You utilised your hands, fondling his balls as the other stroked his base as your mouth paid full attention to his tip.
“Oh fuck!” Lewis hissed as his hips jerked. You hummed around him as you positioned your tongue flat against his tip and lapped up at his premium that had been leaking. His cock was swelling and throbbing in your mouth, adding a bit of a stretch to the corners of your lips but you didn’t care if it hurt you. You gripped his base a little tighter as you moved your head a little faster so that he was stimulated a little more. At the sound of his whiny moans, you dug your nails into his thighs as you refused to stop the momentum that you were at.
The rumble from his chest echoed in the hotel room and you couldn’t help but let him slide further down your throat.
“Just like that baby, fuuuuccckkk.” Lewis’s eyes rolled to the back of his head and forgive him but both of his hands slid underneath the confines of your bonnet to sink into the strands of your hair as he planted his feet flat against the bet and began to fuck up into your mouth. The more you choked and struggled to deal with all of him in your mouth, the more it egged him on. As much as you wanted to please him, you loved it more when he took what he wanted from you.
Today was all about him and however he wanted you and you would give him exactly that.
“Always do me so good baby.” Lewis sighed. “Taking this big dick down your throat.” You nodded your head through the tears with your mouth full of his cock without a care. You comfortably shifted yourself in between his legs before pushing yourself to the limit as the pinch of tears behind your eyes became harder to control as you let him abuse your throat.
You loved sucking his dick but it wasn’t often Lewis allowed you to do so because he was always the giver. He loved pleasing you and derived pleasure from doing so but it was times like these where he let you loose on him, where it felt like he was losing all of his senses. He loved the way you just took him fucking up into his throat with no complaints. Your saliva dribbled down his length but you were determined to suck him until he came in your mouth.
“That’s it sweetheart.” He groaned as he let one of his hands fall from your head to grip on the sheets beside him as the muscles in the pit of his stomach began to tighten. You could feel his legs shifting besides you and you knew that his orgasm was approaching so you took him deeper into his mouth until his head was touching the back of your throat.
Your eyes averted from what you were doing to look up at him and your pussy clenched at the sight before you. Lewis’s head was thrown back with his eyes scrunched shut and mouth agape as he breathed deeply through his nose. You loved bringing him to his absolute weakness - it was empowering.
The soft touch of his fingers caressing the back of your head contrasted the hard thrusts of his hips forcing his cock to bruise the back of your throat. “That’s it. That’s it. I’m going to cum in your mouth if you don’t stop.” He moaned.
You whimpered and nodded your head in response and gripped onto his thighs as you braced yourself. Your cheeks stung from the slapping of his hips against your face but your bared it all to feel him push your head further down until your nose was brushed up against his base.
You fought the urge to gag as his cum erupted and slid down your throat. Lewis moaned loudly above you. “Mmmmm fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck baby.” He moaned loudly above you and it sent your body ablaze and you were highly aware with the effect he was having on you. You could feel your clit throbbing in your panties, begging for attention. You kept your head in place until he had stopped cumming and Lewis was quick to pull out of your mouth.
“Come here.” His voice was hoarse and your body responded to that by your nipples tightening. He pulled you towards him with the back of your neck until your lips were connected. You loved it when he did that. Your ex used to make you feel disgusting when they refused to kiss you after oral but Lewis didn’t care, he’d push his tongue deep into your mouth without a care and it was something that you feel sexy. The lewdness of it all.
You scrambled your body up until you were in his lap as you continued to make out, cupping his face into your hands, you felt his hands slip underneath your dishevelled robe and they roamed until they got to the sides of your soaked underwear.
“Fuuucckk.” Lewis sighed against your lips as his fingers scrunched up the fabric of your underwear beneath. “I can feel how soaked you are. You always get so wet from sucking my dick.”
“Mhm.” You whimpered softly. The sound quickly turning into a gasp as a loud ripping sound rang in the air. Your slightly widened eyes met his that were laced with a playful glint.
“They were in the way.” He smirked as he flung the torn panties onto the floor.
“You’re gonna buy me a new pair.” You said as you placed your hands on his chest and pushed him back down onto the bed.
“I’ll buy the whole fucking shop if you want it.” He licked his lips as he shifted you properly so that your clit laid right on the underside of his cock. He rolled your hips to begin creating a friction. You bit your lip as you looked down at him as you garnered control over the movement of your hips.
The friction and pleasure quickly consumed you and the build up was quick. Already highly aroused from Lewis fucking your mouth, your slickness helped you glide faster and faster against his dick - your orgasm was right around the corner. Lewis began thrusting his hips upwards, bumping the tip of his cock against your clit.
“I want to feel you cum on me.” He softly groaned as he held onto your waist and pressed you down onto him harder with one hand and the free hand came to your breast and pinched your nipple, softly tugging on them. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as the slight pain rolled down your spine and settled in your abdomen.
“I’m about to cum!” You gasped. Your head fell backwards as you moved your hips faster and faster. Your moans were breathless and heavy as the pressure mounted. Your bonnet was slipping off your head as a sheen layer of sweat covering your forehead and neck. Eyes completely shut with your mouth parted, letting out the most loveliest sounds. You were in bliss.
Your thighs tightened against his waist which made Lewis shoot up to wrap his arms around your body and hold you down as your orgasm erupted. You laid your forehead on his as you tried to regulate your breathing and gain all focus on your senses. Once your ears had stopped ringing and your vision cleared, you felt the trace of his fingers up and down your spine.
“Fucking hell.” You mumbled. “I forgot how intense orgasms from humping can be.” Your comment caused him to chuckle. You slumped into his body letting him hold you as you both ignore the uncomfortable stickiness between you.
“Brings back memories of when we first started dating and that’s all we did.” He spoke softly as he continued tracing patterns into your skin not paired with kisses on your shoulder. You groaned in response to his statement, feeling embarrassed about those days. The both of you had been trying to not act on the sexual chemistry between of you. But it never worked.
“God I can’t believe we used to behave like teenagers with no self-control.” You answered him. And shortly after, you fell into a comfortable silence. You continued embracing each other before moving to the bathroom. Your love for each other was felt in the intimate way you bathed each other’s bodies.
The stress that he had carried throughout whole weekend had been melted away from his body. You always made him feel better - you were his anchor that he could lean on when he needed. He laced his fingers with yours and brought the back of your hand to his lips. The silent acknowledgment and appreciation. You smiled at the gesture before proceeding to do the same to his hand.
_____________________
author’s note: It’s the way this was supposed to be just smutty but then I don’t know what I did here at the end lmao. I was feeling mushy and it probably doesn’t fit the vibes and the drastic tone change is 🥴 but we move. I’ve honestly lost a lot of motivation to write but I’m trying. I feel like I owe it to you guys and to myself to finish the things I’ve started. Maybe me finishing this can spark some writing motivation. We’ll see 💕.
@queenshikongo3 @lostinlewis @hersinsarescarlet @dhlfastestlap @olyvoyl @chaneajoyyy @kindan3rdy951 @ricciardosheart @lewiscrown @sarah-ev @mercedesjpg @playgurlxoxo @scorpiobleue @leilaxaliel @amorestevens @nomnombibblenibble @honey-prinxess @ohkapten @bahatibloom @meganwestan @theonlyblue2 @mangodreamsicle @jayvila0 @royallyprincesslilly @felicity-x0 @melodicheauxxlovesfood @lh44adore @mimihopie @paradisehamilton @riasrecs @weetjy @mochachocolatteyaya @lewisroscoelove @valkryienymph @miyuhpapayuh @write-fromthe-start @stronglikemusic @judelver123 @thickbihhwitdagapp @n0vaj3an @cocobuttersmooches
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togrowoldinv · 5 months
Text
Bright
Firefighter!Natasha Romanoff x Female Reader
When Natasha takes you on a date, she asks you to take the next step with her
Warnings: 18+ please! Smut! Kissing, cursing, oral (R and N receiving), Natasha being feral for reader
Note: Hehe firefighter Nat. Enjoy!
Burning Red AU, Main Masterlist
Natasha arrives at your front door right on time. She straightens up her leather jacket and knocks twice, holding a bouquet of flowers in her hand.
Your roommate, Wanda, opens the door with a grin.
“Come on in,” Wanda says.
“Nice to see you again, Wanda,” Natasha says.
“You too, Nat. Y/n will be right out.”
Nat glances around at the room and notices way too many fire hazards.
“Do you think you could unplug a few of those devices?” Natasha asks Wanda. Wanda chuckles and gives Nat a look. She understands it’s your stuff. “Oh, I’ll tell her then.”
You emerge from your room at that moment. Natasha looks you over and smiles.
“What will you tell me?” You ask as you approach her. You drop a kiss to her cheek in greeting. She hands you the flowers she brought you.
“Fire hazards,” Wanda answers for her. She shrugs and walks to the kitchen, leaving you with Natasha.
“You look amazing,” Natasha says.
“You do too, babe. I love this jacket,” you tell her, grabbing the lapels of the leather to pull her closer.
“Mhm, I figured you would,” Nat says. “It will likely end up on your bedroom floor later.”
Natasha places her lips so close to yours that you can feel her breathing, but she doesn’t kiss you. She brushes her nose against yours and smirks.
“Are you ready to go?” She asks.
“I am,” you tell her. “Did you make reservations?”
“I did,” Nat says. She glances at her watch. “And we have to drive a little fast to keep them.”
“Safety expert Natasha Romanoff wants to drive fast?” You tease her.
“Hey, I am a fire safety expert not a road safety one,” she replies. “Let’s go, babe.”
You two walk to Natasha’s car. She opens the door for you and helps you inside. The drive to the restaurant goes quickly, partially due to Natasha’s driving.
Natasha smirks at you as she orders a bottle of wine for you two. She seems like she is up to something tonight, but you can’t figure out what.
“How has work been?” You ask her.
“Not bad. I haven’t had to pull doubles lately, so I am satisfied,” she answers. She leans over the table to be a bit closer to you. Her eyelashes flutter at you. “I would still quit to spend more time with you though.”
“Could the department survive without their best hero?” You ask her.
“You have a point.” She chuckles.
Your conversations remain light as you eat dinner. Dessert is on the way when Natasha suddenly seems nervous.
“Are you okay, Natasha?” You ask her.
“Oh yeah, I’m okay,” she replies nonconvincingly.
She reaches into her pocket and places a small silver key on the table between you. You look at it and back up to her. You can tell she’s trying to gauge your reaction.
“So, I’ve been thinking, and we’ve been together for a while now. I- um- I was hoping we’re ready to take it to the next level. My place is plenty big enough for the two of us and the future we have,” Natasha explains. “Would you want to move in with me?”
“Yes,” you say without hesitation. “I would love to.”
“Really?” She asks with a grin on her face.
“Really, Natasha,” you tell her. “I love you.”
“I love you more,” Natasha says.
She leans over the table and kisses you softly. She wants more, but you’re in a restaurant after all. You two finish up dinner and walk to Natasha’s car. She drives to her place.
“Welcome home,” she says as she opens the front door. The place looks the cleanest you’ve seen it. “I already have plenty of ideas of how we can make it ours. For now, why don’t we take this to the bedroom?”
Natasha practically pulls your hand to lead you to the bedroom. You can tell she’s in one of those moods. She kisses you as she backs your knees into the bed. She pushes you down less than softly onto the bed.
Natasha’s hands find your shirt hem, but you don’t let her lift it up. She groans in annoyance as she continues to kiss you. Nat’s plump lips move to your neck. She licks and sucks against you, leaving marks where she can.
“Natasha,” you moan out as she presses her knee between your leg. The pressure you feel is already causing her movements to make you need her.
“I want to fuck you,” Natasha says. “I want to fuck you so hard.”
“Yeah?” You ask her.
“Yeah, baby,” she breathes out against your neck. Her hand holds pressure against your neck just enough to make you feel hotter. “Can I fuck you?”
“You can,” you tell her. So much for thinking you might want to tease her tonight. “Please, Natasha.”
“Good girl,” Nat says.
She finally gets ahold of your shirt and lifts it over your head. Her lips attach to your nipples quickly. She never gets tired of sucking them. Her hand works to unbutton your pants. She slides them down your legs with her strong hands.
“God, you’re so beautiful,” Natasha says. She kisses between your breasts as her hands find your core.
Natasha grinds her own core against your leg as she rubs her fingers over your pussy. She gathers wetness from between them and brings them up to her lips. It’s absolutely sinful as Natasha licks her fingers while maintaining eye contact with you.
You see the hungriness in her eyes as she moves down your body. Your head falls back in pleasure as she dives into your core. Her tongue works expertly to devour you.
“Fuck, fuck,” you moan out as you feel yourself getting close. Nat reaches up and massages your breast as she continues to eat you out. “Natasha!”
She hums against you as you fall apart under her touch. Licking you clean, Natasha can’t get enough of the taste of you.
“Come here,” you say as she emerges from your legs. She kisses you deeply. You help her take her clothes off. The muscles of her body never cease to amaze you. Natasha pulls away from you and you miss her already.
She leans over the bed and grabs a strap from her dresser. The thick fake cock looks amazing attached to her. When she is about to put lube on it, you take the opportunity to lean forward and take it into your mouth.
Natasha groans at the sight of you taking the thick strap into your mouth. She loves this. Pushing her hips further into you, you choke but keep sucking on her.
“That’s it, baby,” Natasha says. “Let me fuck you until you can’t stand tomorrow.”
You release her strap and she repositions herself to slide into you. You are more than wet enough for her to slip inside of you easily. That final push presses the tip exactly where you need it. Natasha picks up the pace of her hips.
“Fuck, you look so pretty taking me like this,” Natasha says. “Will you come for me, sweetheart? So quickly. I barely even have to try.”
Her slightly degrading tone is enough to put you over the edge. You come again for her. She doesn’t stop her movements until you’re practically pushing her away.
Natasha lays next to you and catches her breath while you catch your own. She interlocks her fingers with yours by your side.
“I’m really glad you asked me to move in with you,” you say. Nat turns her head to look at you.
“Me too, sweetheart. It will be really fun to do this together,” Natasha says. “I love you.”
“I love you most,” you say, skipping the more versus most fight.
“Show me?” She asks.
“Always,” you reply.
You kiss down her body and situate yourself between her legs much like she did yours. This moving in together thing is a great idea. You can do this anytime you want.
The future with Natasha is looking bright.
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cangrellesteponme · 1 year
Note
🌞💖❌ for the writing asks!
Do you have a preferred time of day to write? To come up with ideas, it's any time between midnight and four in the morning. To write on paper it's definitely the afternoon. To write on my computer it's late evenings. I proofread at any hour of the day though. overall, i am a chaotic, unsleeping creature.
What made you start writing? interesting question. well, i was a creative and not so social child so of course i was creating fun stories all the time. then i turned to art instead and forgot about writing, my first love, for a short while. i started actually writing my first story when I was around 11? 12? due to boredom, really. i won't say a word about my middle school experience, but yeah. boredom. i actually started writing online around that time, but didn't enjoy it much. so we get to the more interesting part of my answer: what made me start writing english fanfiction on AO3? i've probably mentioned that i learned a lot of english through reading blue exorcist fanfiction. specifically, my absolute favourite, which haunts me to this day (and i've started re-reading it like... yesterday), kizmet's Tear Me Down series (which... i wouldn't call it a rec because it has Issues, so i'd need at least four paragraphs of warnings and criticisms before recommending it.). this solidified a few things for me. 1) AO3 is just amazing good lord. 2) whump is a great genre. 3) fanfiction can be cathartic to read when it's not inherently cringe because french. it then takes me a few years to actually feel like writing fanfiction, i scrap a multi-chapter project and only keep part of a baptism scene, and boom, we get El alma que anda en amor... so, boredom and blue exorcist.
What's a trope you will never write? oh i have plenty. i may read it if it's well-written, not too smutty, and not just a sexy remix of bioessentialism, but i won't be caught DEAD writing A/B/O. i don't write drunk confessions, only one bed, cuddling for warmth, anything nsfw (unless i am paid. anything for the bag girl.), soulmates (but i read it. my favourite is sodoroses' Chipped Tea Sets) and truly just a fuckton of shit. but most of these could change, so, above all, (and if i ever go back on my word may god strike me where i fucking stand) i won't write miscommunication. i don't fuck with that.
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ronwestbreeze · 5 months
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you're gonna go far | 6
pairing: jake sully x neytiri x tsu'tey x fem!human! reader summary: a scientist arrives on pandora (unwillingly) a year after the exile of the rda. now she must deal with the likes of a clan leader, a great warrior, and a thanator rider. . . word count: 8.5k
read on AO3
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It was a little difficult to get out of bed that morning.
One of those days.
Long and exhausting. It was challenging to get stuff done. You knew things like this wouldn’t just go away instantly. But you hoped that maybe…
It wasn’t too bad like before. You were able to think about the chores that had to be done later in the day and pushed yourself out of the bedroom.
So you went through most of the day barely existing. Norm was the first to notice your slight change in behavior because he began trying to joke more with you—no matter how bad they ended up being—and tried getting you out of your head. And you were thankful for that. At least that’s what was different this time around. You weren’t entirely alone nor held up in your room.
That was progress, right? You honestly couldn’t tell. Sometimes you felt like you were still stuck, that you weren’t moving forward. Or getting better. At least back to what you used to be.
Yet, you’ve been this way—asleep—for so long that you have forgotten what you used to be like. You forgot when the last time you smiled. You forgot when you felt the most happy or any other emotion besides anger and grief.
You wondered where that part of you went. Some days you went searching. Other days you somberly accepted that it was a part of you, that you were never going to get back.
At some point, you figured it died along with your mother.
“You want me to check on the baby today?” Norm asked you as you were getting ready for your link for the day.
You shook your head as you sat on the link bed, “No, I’ll be fine. Just one of those days, you know? We all have em’.”
He frowned when you shrugged it off or appeared a little too nonchalant about it, “Yeah, I guess.”
“Thanks for offering though.”
“Anytime, Doc.” He gave you a pat on the shoulder, while watching you particularly closely, “Just tell me you need a break. Don’t push yourself, okay?”
He was nice. You needed something like that.
Neytiri noticed it too.
While the two of you were in the garden that day, Neytiri had been saying words in Na’vi for you to repeat. And you did it, not perfectly of course, but you managed. It was just that you didn’t take in any information. Not in the way she knew you to.
You had a certain look that told Neytiri you were hanging onto her every word, whenever you were learning something new from her. Eyes slightly vibrant with curiosity.
That look wasn’t there today. Instead, in its place was a dullness and lifeless sort of unfocused gaze.
Your ears were low again.
Neytiri didn’t know when she became so attentive to your moods or facial expressions. So much so that she could tell when you were somewhat happy and really, painfully sad—
You were just easy to read in this form.
Yes, that was it.
“What is wrong, tanhi?” Neytiri eventually asked because she didn’t completely despise you so much to ignore your change in mood.
There was a twitch in your ears when you heard your name being called. You looked up from the newly planted mushroom seeds you had been mentally counting at Neytiri to find her staring at you expectantly. “Huh?”
She rolled her eyes, “You are not listening. I know you are distracted. What is wrong with you?”
You cringed at yourself for allowing yourself to get so distracted by your swimming thoughts. Drowning in them as usual. “It’s nothing. Just have a lot on my mind.”
But the answer did not satisfy her. Neytiri shook her head, “Sky People are always hiding their feelings. You are doing that. It is okay to be sad. It is natural.”
“I’m not hiding it—” You sighed, turning your gaze back to the mushroom seeds. “It’s just one of those days. Maybe—Maybe today I am sad. I could barely get out of bed and tomorrow it might be worse—what are you doing?”
You watched as Neytiri got up and moved behind you. A second later, you feel a brief tugging at your hair until it became loose from your short braid. “If you want to learn our ways, then you must take care of your hair. I look at it and it is a mess.”
“It was in a braid before…”
“I did not like it.”
With that, she got up again and trekked back into the forest. You watched her go in bewilderment at the sudden change of conversation and attitude from the Na’vi woman. You had no idea what had come over the woman or what made her suddenly leave, but you didn’t focus on it for too long. The confusion and startlement you had was enough energy to continue planting the rest of the mushrooms. You didn’t bother putting your hair back into a braid, not wanting to spend time threading through the thick strands until your fingers were too sore to complete your job. And the last thing you needed was something stopping you from finishing this one simple task—
A splash of cold water was suddenly dumped onto your head, leaving you soaking wet.
And terribly pissed.
You snapped your head behind you to find Neytiri placing the leaf down next to her—which was glistening with water. The same water that was now spilled all over you.
“Neytiri—ouch!”
“Hold still.” Neytiri hissed at you as she ran her long fingers through your hair.
You grumbled but reluctantly listened, still confused and a bit pissed at what was going on. And for a while, the two of you remained there. You, sitting on the ground still counting the seeds quietly to yourself while Neytiri stayed behind you. Braiding a few strands of hair.
It was then you realized just how different your hair was from the way it was in your human body. The hair length was very similar to how you used to wear it when you were a teenager. You wondered then just how old this avatar body was.
Once she was finally finished, she crouched down in front of you to get a better look. Her yellow irises scanning your face and her work. Tucking rebellious strands behind your ear, patting down some of the fuzziness, and making sure the braid was visible around your face.
You watched her quietly. And soon, when she was done obsessing over your hair, she watched you too.
It wasn’t the way you and Jake watched each other. This—this had something different about it.
Time was an illusion here. Trapped in her yellow gaze. You hadn’t realized you had been staring for so long—nor did you realize you had briefly glanced at her lips—until a sudden sound from the forest pulled the both of you out of this strange trance.
And once you snapped to your senses, your body quickly reacted. You shot to your feet and cleared your throat, “I gotta check on the avatar now.” You didn’t meet her gaze. “I’ll see you.”
Before she could stop you, you already scurried off. Stopping once you were far enough away out of her sight.
Stopping when you felt a new pair of eyes watching you rather closely.
You glanced around the forest surroundings as you approached the longhouse with a frown until your eyes locked on another pair of yellow eyes. Severe ones.
Tsu’tey was in the trees further away but enough for you to see him watching you, even when you caught him doing so. He did not look away from you. Narrowed eyes and that scowl resting on his angular face.
For a moment you wondered what the look was for. You wondered what he could yell at you about this time, even though you listened to his demands and had stayed away from the Omatikaya territory.
A scared part of you wondered if he had seen you and Neytiri just now.
Nothing happened. But still, it would give enough ammunition for him to verbally attack you. Hate you even more possibly.
Except there would be no battle today. As Tsu’tey disappeared within the trees without a word.
You were confused but relieved at the same time.
Dealing with an angry clan leader was not on your to-do list. Nor were you properly prepared for it.
After watching the trees in silence, you eventually went inside.
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Neytiri watched your retreating figure with a frown, her heart…shifting—only a little bit as you disappeared. Her gaze then moved toward the trees, the area where the sound had come from before. And with an irritated frown, she got up and stalked toward the area.
They were still there. She could feel their eyes on her as she went further into the forest. With a hiss, she glared at the trees, “Come out. Enough hiding!”
Just a little bit above her, a few feet away a familiar warrior snaked out of the bushes and seated himself on the large branch with his usual expression he wore whenever he was away from their shared hut.
Neytiri frowned up at Tsu’tey, “You are watching me.”
“I am watching her.”
After a beat and a quiet sigh, Neytiri climbed up the tree and joined him. Despite his very sour mood, he tugged her close to his side as they sat together. On the branch, they had a good view of the Avatar Compound. A few dreamwalkers were running about but none of them seemed to bother Tsu’tey as much as you did. Neytiri could easily tell with how he kept glaring at the longhouse, the same place she always watched you disappear in whenever you left your false body.
“You have been spending time with her,” Tsu’tey stated more so than asking. There wasn’t much to hide, they both knew Neytiri spent some of her free time visiting you. Only when Tsu’tey or Jake are busy with their duties and she’s finished with hers before the both of them. “I do not like it.”
“She has done nothing.” Neytiri reasoned.
“Yet.”
“And what did I say if she does? I would kill her myself.”
As she said this, Neytiri felt a certain wavering in her heavy words. Like a part of her didn’t believe it anymore.
She rested her head on his shoulder, hugging his arm with a content sigh, “But I cannot ignore what the Great Mother has shown me. She has stopped my bow before and now she’s done it a second time. Do you not think it means something, yawne?”
In the corner of her, she watched as his jaw tightened, his features becoming particularly focused. “I do not trust this.”
“You do not trust the Great Mother?”
“That is not what I mean.” He corrected her calmly. Neytiri knew that Tsu’tey, like any other child of Eywa respected her and trusted in her signs. Always had. That was how he was raised. And she knew he wasn’t about to abandon that because of one demon.
But his words were still reluctant, “I do not know where our Great Mother is leading us. I do not know why she wants that demon spared—when she is just like the rest of them.”
Neytiri considered his words, “Perhaps she is like Jake—”
“There is only one Jake. And she is nothing like him.”
She made a sound of disagreement but didn’t push further on the subject. She noticed how tense he was, how tense he had been for the past week. She wondered then if he was truly upset by this or if there was something more to this quiet anger he so carefully restrained. Of course, his hatred for the Sky People was no question.
But Neytiri knew Tsu’tey.
Skin and bone. Heart and soul.
She knew her mate. Not only as a mate but as a friend. They had grown up together. Along with her sister, Sylwanin. There was nothing he could hide from her even if he tried.
“She may not be like Jake. But clearly, the Great Mother has chosen her for a reason. My mother even allows her to stay—I believe it is time you seek the answers.”
Tsu’tey scoffed but didn’t brush her off. Instead, he leaned in closer, allowing his hand to rest on her growing stomach. “You will be a great Tsahik.”
“Not as great as my mother. Nor my sister.”
Tsu’tey shook his head and cupped her cheek, “You will be great, my beautiful heart.”
A soft smile tugged at her lips only to falter when she noticed how exhausted he truly looked. How close he looked to breaking but hiding it. He could never hide it well from her. Nor Jake.
She then took his face in her hands and whispered soothingly, “What is it, my love?”
Knowing that there was no point in denying a response—knowing that Neytiri would not stop until she got what she wanted—Tsu’tey turned away from her to stare back at the compound.
“The Tipani clan are becoming reckless. They already do not like the Sky People that have stayed—but now that the demon has come, I worry they will begin to take matters into their own hands. I worry…that our clans will begin to clash.”
Neytiri took his hand in hers and pressed a gentle kiss onto his knuckles, “If it comes to it, I will stand by you. Jake will too. But I also will ask you to speak to our Great Mother about your troubles.” She caressed his exhausted lines with a small frown, “I worry for you, Tsu’tey. I do not want you to take on this task by yourself. You have Jake and I to be with you. That is why Eywa brought us together.”
Right then, he seemed to consider her words. His gaze was still unfocused while staring at the longhouse. A silence settled between them.
“Eywa has created this new path for us.” Tsu’tey mused. “Somedays I wonder if it will lead to something good in the end.”
“Do you think it won’t?”
He was silent. And Neytiri didn’t push.
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When Tsu’tey went to the Vitraya Ramunong, the night had already settled around him. When he went to kneel at the tree, connecting his queue to one of the links, his prayers were silent. But his questions were clear. His intention was pure to the Great Mother.
What does it all mean? Guide me, All Mother.
So when a single atokirina flew away from the tree, Tsu’tey took to following it both out of curiosity and apprehension. The Great Mother’s answers weren’t always clear. If anything, her signs only led to more questions.
So, Tsu’tey wondered. He wondered if this would lead to any more answers.
Or just more unwanted questions.
Tsu’tey rushed through the forest, never losing sight of the spirit. He kept going and going until he was nearing the Sky People’s base. Until the trees suddenly became familiar. Until the grounds he had seen many times before unwillingly began to appear around him.
But his body never stopped moving. He never stopped following it. Too desperate for answers. Too desperate, too yearning.
Oh Eywa, he was yearning.
And then, and then, and then.
And then he was staring down at your still false body.
It was strange. Seeing no life in your face. Tsu’tey had only seen your false body from far away, but now seeing you up close. You looked so different yet the same as your human form.
Why was he here? Why did the spirit bring him to…
No.
No.
No.
His vision rippled. Your body morphed from your human form to your false body—impossible.
And then he woke up.
Awake.
Awake.
Awake.
Tsu’tey finally realized where he was. Instead of standing in the middle of the forest chasing an atokirina, instead of standing over your false body, he was back in his hut. With his mates sleeping next to him. With his son cuddled between both Jake and him. With Neytiri hugging his waist from behind.
A dream. It was only a dream.
But why you? Why you?
Why?
“Yawne?” Tsu’tey breathed out a sigh and looked over his shoulder to find Jake shifting out of his sleep, looking at him through heavy eyelids. He sat up a bit, careful not to disturb Neteyam’s sleep as he did, “Another nightmare?”
Tsu’tey hesitated—considered the question. The dream he just had. Was it a nightmare?
“No. I am fine. Go back to sleep, my love.”
Jake didn’t look entirely convinced but eventually lied back down. Usually, it took a while for Jake to fall asleep, so Tsu’tey lay back down, adjusting Neytiri’s arm around his waist and squeezing his other hand on Jake’s shoulder.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Jake asked, his voice deep and sluggish.
Tsu’tey nodded, and tucked his nose into Neteyam’s cheek as gently as he could, “I am now.”
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It took you a little longer to get out of bed the following week. But you managed. You watched a few more of your mother’s logs and even some of the other ones still in the system.
Dr. Augustine. Norm. Some guy named Quaritch. And then there was Jake Sully.
As a human.
You paused the video to examine his face. You suppose the traits matched his now blue form. The only difference was that instead of his longish dreads, he had a buzz cut in the video. And a tattoo poking out of his short sleeve shirt.
Eventually, you moved on, willing yourself to forget his face for the time being.
You also tried not to think about the fact that Neytiri hadn’t been back for about a week now. Which was normal. You didn’t overthink it. Especially not after that moment—
Eventually, you moved on, willing yourself to forget your thoughts about her.
Then you remembered Tsu’tey. Him watching you so closely. You hoped he didn’t see you and Neytiri. Frankly, you weren’t sure what would happen if he did know.
He’d kill you. That’s for sure.
Eventually, you moved on, willing yourself to forget all three of them.
When you finally got out of bed, you continued with your regular schedule and tried to think of literally anything else. You tended to your garden by yourself and continued checking the baby.
There was a bit of determination for yourself, to keep moving. To not stay in one place any longer or else you’d be stuck.
And you weren’t sure if you’d make it out if you did.
Jake continued visiting the tank room whenever he could.
Today was one of them. Only this time you made it before he did.
“How’s the baby?”
You glanced up briefly from your notes, “Healthy. It might be because Na’vi babies might grow faster in pregnancy—judging by that we might have a couple more months before it’s born.”
Jake nodded, his face serious, “Anything else?”
For a brief second you didn’t respond, too caught up in your thoughts until you realized he had asked you a question. Jake tilted his head, brows furrowed at you.
You shook your head eventually, “No, everything’s all normal.”
He stared at the belly for a moment longer before he left. You were somewhat surprised at his quick retreat but didn’t think much about it. He was some type of great warrior, he was probably busy with something else in his clan. If it meant that the two of you didn’t have to interact much with him anymore or probably a lot shorter than before, then you were okay with it.
It seemed he finally took the hint.
All you could do was keep moving.
Jake came again the next day.
This time around you brought out the ultrasound.
He watched you and the machine intensely. You noticed and gave a sound close to a huff or a snort, “Nothing’s wrong with it. I’m just doing a thorough check-up today.”
A quick look of relief crossed his otherwise exhausted features, “Right, right, of course.”
Once you got the ultrasound running and connected to the avatar, you immediately found the heartbeat with the blurry image of the fetus appearing on the screen. It had grown considerably since the first time you saw it.
“There she is.” You mumbled mostly to yourself. The heartbeat was calming in a way, easing your usual tense muscles.
Jake perked up instantly, staring at you in disbelief, “She? It’s a girl?”
You glanced up at him briefly to find a soft expression on his face upon looking at the fetus. Neteyam—who you just noticed attached to his chest—sleepily snuggled closer to his father’s chest. When his head moved out of the sling, Jake held the back of his head, giving it support.
“Yes.” You gave a short nod.
Another look of relief flashed across his face, this time he didn’t try to hide it like before. A small smile tugged at his lips, “That’s—That’s nice. Amazing.”
In the corner of your eye, you watched him. That easy fatherly expression fell upon his face. How soft his smile was, for something that wasn’t even his. You weren’t sure what to think of it—no, you expected it. It was foreign. A father loving his child. To you at least.
You didn’t know your father. Nor did you have a father figure in your life. That type of love was unfamiliar to you.
Love itself was a foreign concept that you could not yet grasp. The only time you could truly say you experienced something close—similar to love—was with your mother.
And if love was like this—heavy. Leaving you…like this.
You weren’t sure you would want to experience any type of love ever again.
“You sure you’re ready to take on another?” You raised your brows, not looking up from the belly.
Jake looked at you, “Do you care for my answer?”
“I am watching over her. I suppose I should make sure she is left with somewhat tolerable parents—that is, if there aren’t any problems with her when she’s born.” You hummed, rolling your eyes at the sudden look of worry on his face. “Relax, that’s the standard check-up of any baby—well, I don’t know how different it will be compared to human ones.”
A beat went by before he finally answered, “I wouldn’t be honest if I said I wasn’t nervous. What new parent isn’t?”
“Mmm.”
The rest of the session was just the two of you, sitting in a somewhat comfortable silence. Comfortable for you because you were able to ignore him without any problems. And Jake wasn’t being too talkative or apologetic, which was a plus. But he was noticeably less hostile toward you as the time went by. Showing that he was taking the truce quite seriously and keeping his end of the bargain.
In other words, the truce was possibly the best option for you both. You could work in peace without being hammered or interrogated. And Jake would continue his visits without any problems.
You still didn’t like him. And you were sure the feelings were mutual.
But things were becoming easier.
And sometimes you like easy. Just as much as a challenge.
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There was a part of him that was curious. Jake didn’t understand it. He didn’t understand Neytiri’s easy trust in you but it only made him more curious as he kept coming to see the baby.
Of course, you were guarded and curt around him. And he was quite the same but that didn’t mean he wasn’t at least a little bit interested in why you were so important to their deity.
So many questions.
A part of him wanted to ask Eywa himself—he wasn’t much used to praying to her but he would now and then out of respect for the People. If he asked, he would possibly gain an answer—which was incredibly rare—or he would gain more questions, which was the more common response.
So, Jake took to finding things out for himself. Even if it meant doing it the hard way. Even if it meant getting his head out of his ass and finally putting things into perspective.
Jake Sully was willing to at least keep this tolerable relationship with you going. Keeping this stable cord steady. You weren’t going anywhere anytime soon. It was time he had to get used to it. It was time for him to get over himself.
And he was willing to show that he did want something different. That he was ready to change, to finally understand you in a way.
But you still didn’t like him. Which was fine.
He didn’t like himself all that much either.
Another week went by and Neytiri still hadn’t come back. Surprisingly, you found yourself missing her. And when you began missing others, you got angry.
Since you didn’t feel like going through that process again, you resolved yourself to thinking that she must’ve gotten busy with her clan. Or grown tired of watching over you and your depressing personality once she realized that you weren’t a threat to her clan.
That must’ve been it. That’s what you chose to believe at that moment.
One day at a time.
You moved forward. Because you had to.
Throughout the week you focused on your work tending to the garden, checking on the baby, and even taking on more responsibilities around Hell’s Gate.
Sometimes you’d help Dr. Patel in the bio labs, other times you went with the other avatars to train your body. There were also days you would help Norm pack different human items he’d usually bring for the Na’vi children of the Omatikaya Clan. You, of course, never ventured too close to their territory whenever you went with him to drop off the items. You’d either stay in the ship you flew in or stay at the base as he left on his own.
Jake still kept coming around but his time there became shorter and shorter with each visit. Again, you didn’t bat an eye. You welcomed it and continued with your work.
Toward the end of your busy and long week, you woke up with a start when a blaring sound struck your room. It had to have been the middle of the night as you looked around frantically, only to realize the sound was coming from your tablet.
Quickly, you grabbed it to find the alarm was the system alerting you something was wrong.
And the problem was coming from the tank room.
You stumbled out of your bedroom and dashed through the long halls until you finally ended up in the tank room. Not caring that you were probably making a bunch of noise in the process.
When you got to Augustine’s tank, your heart sank when you found Grace’s avatar was violently twitching with the lights inside of the tank blaring a red.
“Fuck!” You hissed as you immediately checked for the problem.
The first thing you checked was the avatar itself. Her heart and the baby’s were fine but the avatar’s was slightly elevated, probably in response to whatever was happening to the machine which was the next thing you began to check.
There you discovered that something in it was malfunctioning. Throwing the liquid temperature off, the placentiums weren’t giving any more nutrients like they were supposed to. Whatever was going on, you didn’t have time to fix it or the machine.
If you wasted time like that more damage could be done and you weren’t going to risk that. Especially when the baby was in there. Especially when the baby could receive the worst of your mistake. Of this malfunction.
So, you worked fast.
You searched the room for an empty tank—which you were able to find and rolled it over next to the one Dr. Augustine’s avatar was in. You pulled the empty tank open just as Norm and a few other scientists entered.
“What happened?!” Norm questioned hastily.
Quickly, you jumped down from the empty tank and rushed toward Grace’s, “It’s malfunctioning. I don’t know why but we have to move her.”
Thankfully, Norm didn’t ask any more questions. He ordered the other scientists to help you.
You worked quickly. Draining the rest of the liquid from the tank, carefully moving the avatar—this required multiple hands—until you placed it in the new tank.
“Track her heart rate.” You ordered one of them.
A second later, a woman responded, “Stable but its body temperature’s dropping fast.”
By the time she said that you closed the tank. “Norm, fill it up.”
You jumped down, grabbed the heart monitor from the female scientist, and watched the lines closely. The tank was nearly filled up as Norm came up beside you.
Along with the heart monitor, your heart pounded through your ears as the tank finally filled up. You gave the monitor to Norm and went to adjust the temperature back to the usual settings.
When the blue lights came on it felt as if the room breathed a huge sigh of relief. You took the monitor back as Norm hummed, “Lucky you were the one to get here first. And quick thinking too—do you know what went wrong with the other one?”
The rest of the scientists poured out of the room as you slowly shook your head. “I don’t know. I couldn’t waste time, Spellman. Not when it could’ve risked the baby.”
Norm nodded and patted your shoulder, “You’re right. Good work, Doc.” He moved to the other side of the tank with a thoughtful expression. “You want me to stay and help with anything else?”
The lines on the monitor were stable, which brought you some sense of comfort. And yet the slight panic remained. “No, no. I’m good here. You can go back to bed. I’ll finish up here soon.”
“Okay.” Norm eventually moved toward the exit. “Get some sleep, Reeds. I’m serious.”
You nodded without looking at him. “Yeah, sure. Goodnight.”
“Good morning.” Norm corrected with a tired grin.
With that, Norm left. You breathed in a steady breath before grabbing a chair from the corner of the lab and sinking onto it. The monitor was kept nearby, the heart rate melodic in your ears as you set your tablet down on your lap.
For a while, you studied how far along the avatar was. It had been a good couple of months since you first discovered the child—which left her at about twenty-four to twenty-seven weeks at least. That’s not even counting when she first got pregnant. But compared to a human, the Na’vi pregnancy went by a lot faster, which also confirmed your theory.
Or maybe your perception of time was fucked up with how distracted and busy you had been.
Was that why the malfunction happened? Were you too distracted to notice any faults in the system during your usual sessions? What did happen?
You contemplated this for a while. Until your mind became hazy and your eyes droopy. At some point, you fell asleep next to the tank because there was no way you would leave the fetus’ side at that point. Not after all of that.
It felt as if your eyes had been closed for only a couple of seconds before you were suddenly jolted awake to find Norm standing over you.
“What happened? Is it the tank again?” You instantly asked, turning to check on the tank.
“No, no, no—the—she’s fine!” Norm quickly assured while easing you back into your chair. “I thought I told you to get some sleep.”
You stared at him for a beat, both a tired and an annoyed expression easily falling upon your face. “Well, I assure you I certainly wasn’t sitting with my eyes closed just then.”
Norm winced, “Sorry. I thought you’d want to get in your own bed before Jake gets here.” He rubbed the back of his neck as you got up from the chair. “I had to tell him what happened—he’s flying over now.”
“That’s fine.” You grumbled. “I can stand just one day in the same room with him. Besides, I should probably figure out what went wrong with that tank.”
Norm nodded, “Okay—uh, should I be a mediator for the both of you or..?”
“Oh, please.” You rolled your eyes. “It’s not like I’m meeting their clan leader.”
“You really need to try and get along with him.” Norm chuckled with a shake of his head.
You scowled, “Are you going to keep yapping in my ear about it or be useful?”
“Alright, alright, don’t an ass.” He strolled toward the doorway. “Jake’ll be here in fifteen.”
Once he left, you got to work again. You weren’t an official engineer but you knew a good amount of information from your training back on Earth. You hoisted yourself up and into the tank before you began taking it apart. You stood in it, trying to find out what exactly had gone wrong—while glancing at the heart monitor now and then.
Your brain was moving quickly yet hazily from the sleep. Eyes honed in on the mess of wires in front of you. So distracted by your silent questions and theories that you didn’t hear the incoming footsteps. Only the voice that followed after.
“What happened? Is she okay?”
“Yes, she’s fine.” You replied immediately, watching in the corner of your eye as he approached the new tank. His hair was tied back and across his chest was a leather strap that carried what looked like a machete. “It was just a malfunction with the tank. We were able to get her out before any real damage could be done.”
Jake frowned, “Malfunction? How the hell did you let that happen?!”
“Look, I don’t know.” You replied calmly, ignoring the twitch in your jaw. “I’m still trying to figure all that out. But she’s out of it and fine. Norm helped if that makes you feel better—”
“I thought you had things handled? What happened to that?” Jake scowled, his tone vicious.
“I do.”
“Then what the hell happened—”
“I already said I don’t know!” You seethed, glaring down at the group of wires now hanging from your hands. Somewhere in the back of your brain, you realized that Norm really did have to stand between the two of you. That this truce wasn’t stable enough. That the two of them were just too explosive. “The hell do you think I’m trying to do? Kill the baby?!”
You missed the way Jake’s face faltered slightly, catching himself. “No…No, that’s not what I—”
“Then get off my fucking dick!” You snapped, throwing a piece of the tank to the floor with a clatter.
All sound was gone from the room then.
This was the last thing you wanted to deal with. Being scolded like some child—like you already weren’t beating yourself up over this mess.
You sunk onto the floor of the tank and continued working. Because that’s what you were best at. Not conversations. Not people. Not love.
Work. It was everything to you.
Already you were mentally drowning Jake out, ignoring the fact that there was another person in the room with you. But eventually, you realized that there was nothing wrong with the wires. It must’ve been something else. Another theory down the drain.
Jake uttered your name at one point. And you ignored him.
There was a sigh followed by a short pause before he spoke, “I’m sorry.” You continued ignoring him. There was something about his apologies. You were just tired of them. “That wasn’t fair, you’re right. I shouldn’t have come at you like that—”
“Augustine’s avatar is over there.” You mumbled. “You can check on her yourself.”
There was another silence but you were too focused on what was in front of you to notice or care. You were so determined to ignore him and the sting in the corners of your eyes.
You didn’t like to cry. Especially in front of others.
Thankfully, you ignored him long enough until you realized you were finally alone.
After a while, you breathed out a tired sigh.
Fortunately, as the days went by there were no other problems with the new tank or baby, but it didn’t stop you from always double-checking everything after that close call. So much so that you didn’t realize how much sleep you were missing until Norm pulled you away from your work and forced you back into your room. Locked the door and everything just to make his point.
With the promise of Norm taking care of your work, you eventually allowed yourself to sleep for practically the entire day. Not without the tablet on the dresser next to your bed of course.
Even after catching up on some semblance of sleep, Norm still didn’t let you get back to your schedule right away. Which irritated you of course.
“I don’t want you in my garden, Spellman.”
He rolled his eyes, “And I don’t want you stressing yourself out. As your friend and colleague who happens to care about your well-being, I demand you stay away from the garden until you’re completely rested.”
You frowned at him, “We’re friends?”
“Shut up and accept my love.”
And he kept true to his word. Norm kept you away from the gardens, even the tank room. And made sure that the scientists knew how to keep you away as well. He covered all of his bases.
Damn him.
You couldn’t sit around and do nothing though. So, at some point you were so desperate you resorted to practically begging Norm to just give you something to do that would distract you throughout the whole day. You nagged and nagged and nagged until Norm finally gave in.
“There’s an old link shack north of Hell’s Gate. We’ve been thinking about restoring all of them around the area. But that particular shack’s connection is a little wonky. Maybe you could head over and restock the supplies with your avatar. Maybe even fix the connection while you’re at it.”
You nodded quickly, “Yeah, sure thing. I’ll get on that—”
“And don’t try to sneak your way to the gardens!” Norm added sternly, sending you a look over his shoulder while clicking away at his computer. “Plus, you won’t need the Samson ships. The shack’s not too far from here.”
With that, you went to grab supplies, such as med kits, weapons—one gun and a few stacks of ammo—blankets, Na’vi weapons, a hunting knife, and a bow with a few arrows. You kept the hunting knife to yourself just in case.
After getting all of this, you placed the bag of supplies in the compound longhouse where your avatar always slept when you weren’t linked. Once you got to your link bed and linked up with your avatar, you grabbed the hunting knife and the bag of supplies before taking off north from Hell’s Gate.
The sky was grey today with a few darker clouds on the horizon instead of the shimmering blue you were used to. A storm might’ve been coming.
Which meant you had to make this trip quick. There was no telling how bad these storms could get on this planet.
Similar to how you traveled through the forest with Neytiri, you took to the trees so that you’d have less of a chance of running into or disturbing any of Pandora’s finest. Hopefully, you had learned to be quiet enough to not draw any attention your way as well.
As time went by, the sky got darker. You followed the coordinates Norm gave you while slipping through the trees like the true shadow you were. Traveling and climbing through the trees got easier as you went. You had done it enough times with Neytiri that you knew what to do and how to do it. Albeit not perfectly, but enough to get by. Blending into the environment as best as you could.
You enjoyed it, the vibrant life and colors of the forest once again. Every time felt like you were taking in Pandora for the very first time. Every time felt like a huge breath of the freshest air. Here, you were weightless. You weren’t a scientist. You weren’t human. You weren’t an avatar. You were just were.
You existed here. You were real.
Truly this place was everything you dreamed of when you were younger.
Rain began to pour by the time you spotted the shack. It was propped up and well hidden in a large tree, with moss growing out of the sides, the entire thing looking like it hadn’t been used in a long time.
You slid down from a branch as quietly as you could and landed in front of the metal entrance. By the time you got the door open and crouched inside, you were soaking wet from the rain.
The shack itself wasn’t too small, which surprised you. It must’ve been made to allow avatars to be able to roam freely through here without too much trouble.
Once the door was closed, you sunk onto the empty cot in the corner of the shack and began unpacking the supplies. The med kit went into the cabinets above a wooden table attached to the wall. The blankets went on the cot. The gun and ammo went under the cot in a long black case filled with old and rusted weapons you had to throw out into the rain. You kept the hunting knife tucked in your shorts.
The rain kept going. It was relaxing. Stopping for a moment to listen. Smelling it through the cracked window next to the cot you sat on.
It was nice. You could stay here if you wanted. This could’ve been your new home if you didn’t have responsibilities at Hell’s Gate.
Lastly, you worked on the radio that sat on the wooden table—which you assumed was connected to the main base. So, for the next few minutes, you took your time messing with the radio. Listening to either ongoing static or barely audible voices going in and out. At some point, you messed with the wires a few times before Norm’s voice finally came through.
“Tomato. Tomato. Tomato.”
You pressed one of the buttons, “Hey, Norm.”
“Oh, Jesus! Reeds!” Norm startled. “Warn a guy next time!”
You pressed your lips into a thin line, “I just wanted to test if it worked. Clearly, I fixed it.”
A snap of thunder drew you away from the radio. Seemed like it was getting worse out there. You hadn’t realized how long you’d been out there until now.
Norm seemed to realize this too, “You gonna stay there and unlink?”
“Mmm.” You paused. “I’m gonna try bringing the avatar back.”
He sighed, “Alright, good luck.”
“Don’t need it.” You said as you got up. “I’m too awesome.”
“Whatever, Reeds.”
Another clap of thunder filled the air as you stepped out of the shack. Immediately you were soaked by how heavy the rain was.
Thunder continued to boom, making your skin jump every now and then. It was just terribly cold, making you start to run so that you could get out of it faster.
You ran and ran, and ran, and ran, and ran, only to realize just how much noise you were making and that the area was too unfamiliar to you. It wasn’t long until you realized how lost you were. It was just too dark to navigate your way back or recognize any familiar spots guiding your way.
With that in mind, you went toward the nearest tree and began to climb.
But your body was yanked away from the tree bark almost instantly as you were tackled down to the ground by a large weight. Your left shoulder exploded with vicious pain as if a bunch of sharp knives buried itself into your skin and continued to tear through it.
A strangled scream left your lips as the thunder clapped in the sky once more. You could barely see the creature but it was a dark, large beast. Digging further into your shoulder.
You hadn’t even seen it coming. You hadn’t been paying attention.
Now…
Now you might die because of it.
You tried shoving at it, managing to get most of its weight off of you. But the teeth were still in your shoulder. There was still pain. There was still warm liquid dripping down your arm.
When you moved your leg, you remembered the hunting knife in your shorts. Immediately, you dug into your pocket and found the handle instantly.
After that, you didn’t waste any time stabbing at it blindly and desperately. You did this, you kept going until more warm liquid covered your knife-wielding arm. You did this until the animal was limp against your body. Until you were able to push it off and scramble to your feet and run.
The pain was awful but bearable enough for you to run back to the shack at least. Mud was all over your clothes—some of it in your mouth. If anything, you probably looked insane right now.
You ran. Ran. Ran. Ran. Ran. Way too clumsy to be quiet. What’s worse was you had no clue where you were. And there was more shuffling coming from the bushes and trees surrounding you. If anything, you were probably throwing yourself further into the lion’s den.
It wasn’t long until a black creature suddenly came out of the bushes in front of you, causing you to stumble to a stop as it made its way toward you. Sleek and dangerous. Eyes locked on you.
Thunder boomed again. An identical creature came out from your right. Another on your left. Another. And another. And another.
Until you were surrounded. Until you knew there was no way you were going to make it out of this.
You kept your knife in front of you, trying to ignore the pain in your shoulder, the warm liquid running down your arm, the shakiness in your legs. You began to wonder how much blood you were losing with your energy slowly dwindling as time went by—no, it didn’t matter.
Damn it, you weren’t going to die here! Not like this.
“Come on!” You hissed as you pointed the knife at them. “Come on!”
They growled at you, closing in. Finally, one of them pounced toward you. With the knife, you slashed at it. At that, the creature cringed away and missed you entirely but that didn’t mean the others were going to try their luck.
Out of instinct, you stumbled back as two more tried coming for you. Your back hit a tree as you yelled and swung your knife wildly at them.
Only neither the creature nor your blow landed.
The two creatures were thrown to the side as another clap of thunder struck your ears.
Another figure emerged from the trees and rushed toward you.
Instantly, you swung the knife, only for it to be caught in an iron grip.
You screamed.
“Hey, hey, easy!”
It took you only a couple of moments for you to register the words and that they were coming from a familiar avatar. The last person you ever expected to be here.
Jake lowered your arm with a hiss. You blinked as another round of thunder rattled your ears.
The creatures were closing in again. Jake turned his back to you, hissing at them. His larger arm stretched in front of you protectively when one of them got a little too close for his liking. The creature hissed back
You watched warily behind him, still clutching the dirtied knife. Both of you exhausted and animalistic. Yellow eyes glimmering. One with warning and the other with desperation.
Jake looked terrifying in this light. Just as murderous and dangerous as the animals that surrounded you.
You remained behind him, trembling but glaring. Gripping that knife like your life depended on it.
There was suddenly more shuffling, more thunder, and the creatures then scattered.
You, dumbfounded by this, spoke shakily, “Why did they—”
Jake grabbed your wrist holding the knife.
“We need to move.” He said, dragging you forward.
The two of you ran in the opposite direction of the creatures. He hauled you up a tree before climbing up himself. “Is there a link shack nearby?”
For a moment, you wondered how he knew about the link shacks. You leaned on a branch both to catch your breath and because the quick movements left you a bit dizzy. When you couldn’t come up with plausible answers to your silent question you instead said, “I just came back from one. North from here—I don’t know how far it is.”
Your body leaned a little too far. Jake was quick to grab you in his stronger, more stable arms as he pulled you away from falling off the edge, “Hey, hey, Reeds, I need you here with me, okay? Just stay awake long enough until we get to the shack and we’ll clean you up.”
“I’ve...I’m losing a lot of…” Blood. Blood was what you wanted to say. But the adrenalin was wearing out. Your shoulder throbbed horribly. Exhaustion weighed you down and placed inconvenient black spots in your vision.
“I know.” He draped your good arm over his shoulder and kept you upright. “I know, we’ll get there. I promise.”
There was no arguing with him. You were soaked to the bone and in a hell of a lot of pain. Going back to the shack was your best bet in this horrid weather.
Jake continued to support your weight as the two of you followed the same coordinates leading back to the shack—or rather you haze inaudible directions of what you could remember from the information Norm had given you while Jake haphazardly followed.
Thankfully, the rest of the way wasn’t a long journey. Or maybe you just kept blacking in and out along the way, you didn’t know.
Jake and you stumbled through the door of the shack. He closed the door while you made your way to the radio with whatever strength you had left.
“Norm.” You tapped the radio while wincing. The pain in your shoulder was getting worse. Before now you had been tolerating it. “Norm, can you hear me?”
The static went on.
“Storm must be messing with the signal,” Jake said from behind you as he rummaged through the shack. “We should stay here until the storm settles—”
You rested your head against the small table, the rest of his words becoming nothing but muffled noise to your ears. God, you’ve lost so much blood. And you were so tired.
For a moment, just for a few seconds, you wanted to sleep. Only for a moment.
“Reeds.”
A larger hand rested on the back of your neck, bringing you slightly out of your unconsciousness.
Jake kept calling your name. “Hey, where’s the med kits at? We need to work on your arm, okay? And I need you to stay awake. Can’t have you unlinking in this condition.”
Sluggishly, you nodded, “They’re in the cabinets.”
More thunder rolled by. Jake left your side briefly to search through the cabinets above you. You leaned back in your seat, staring bleakly up at the ceiling.
“How long do these storms last?” You asked.
The thunder responded with a clap.
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sorry for the long wait! hopefully it was all worth the wait. another 8k chapter, yay, that wasn't difficult to write at all lol! but now jake and reeds are alone in a shack. anything could happen....
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(i'm not adding anymore people anymore!)
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anjelicawrites · 6 months
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Fun to be had
Paring: Michael Gavey x reader
Synopsis: you’re studying alone on a Friday night, and decide to, finally, face the weird guy following you. Fun ensues.
Warnings: dry humping in public (in a library), almost getting caught, kissing, biting, scratching, Michael’s accidental stalkerish behaviour.
A/N: reader is AFAB but not described. Where needed, they/them pronouns used.
It’s Friday night and you should be out, getting drunk at the pub or dancing your arse off at the club, instead, you are at the library, different editions of the same poem opened in front of your face, not because you are cramming for a paper, but because you don’t feel like having to deal with people, irritated as you are with life now.
You have those days where you don’t feel like being sociable, instead, you have this need to live through the words of others, pouring over different editions of the same work, until you are satisfied with the results of your own translation. This specific Friday is one of those days, and you are elated that the library is empty, or almost.
You are not truly alone, hidden in this corner because, sitting at the other table of this little nook, there’s a guy.
You are almost positive his name is Michael, Michael something, mathematical genius and nerd at the end of the social hierarchy. The guy who has been following you, changing his sitting place every single time you did in the past few weeks.
You didn’t see it at the start, with the library always packed you started sitting wherever you could find a free spot and thought nothing when he did the same, you didn’t even noticed him!
You realized when you started studying late in the evening.
With the library half empty, this Michael guy could have picked any spot, every single time, instead he kept sitting at a table next to yours, always with a good vantage point. Yet, you kept telling yourself that maybe he just didn’t want to sit somewhere alone in a place which becomes creepy at night time, nothing to truly see here, but, but… If you have to be blunt about it, he doesn’t give you the idea of a chap who is afraid of being alone; if he is who you think he is, then having no friends it’s his norm.
You could have left it at that, forget about the whole thing, but you are curious, far more than what’s healthy for you, so you concocted a plan, quite stupid really, to gauge his reaction. You partner in crime, albeit without knowing it, had been you friend Ellie, who was studying for a chemistry exam, quite complicated and hard to pass. One night you two were studying and she was getting more and more frustrated, you decided to act.
“So.” You asked her. “What do you think about science?”
“Fuck science!” Right on cue she gives you the answer you need.
Staring in the direction of Michael you said loud and clear.
“Yeah, fuck science indeed” right the second he was looking at you.
It might have been a random coincidence, but he became bolder after your little experiment, his eyes not leaving yours whenever you stared up from the books and even changing tables, whenever a spot nearer yours was freed, and he was already sitting somewhere else, as if he wanted you to know what he was doing.
But what was that he was hoping to achieve by acting like a stalker?
You lift your head and there he is, seemingly engrossed in his own work, glasses low on his long nose and the irritation you’ve felt all day spikes up, red and warm in your belly and you know you shouldn’t do a single thing, but pack your stuff and go back to your dorm, you know you should, yet you stare at him again and he’s looking at you, unabashedly, with that pretentious smile on his face and you throw all your good intentions out of the window.
You stand up, the old chair scraping on the floor and march towards him. He looks startled and huffs in surprise when you straddle his legs and pop his thick glasses up his head.
“I think it’s time we greet one another properly, don’t you think? You’ve been following me around, after all!”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about!”
In his panic he tries to slide you off himself, but your ground yourself against his body, your hands grabbing the backrest of his chair, forgetting that you are wearing a skirt tonight.
“Care to tell me why you’re acting like a stalker?”
“I’m not a stalker!” He seems to have managed to grasp control back, the mask of surprise gone from his face. “Get off me!”
“I will, when you’ll tell me the truth!”
Michael had noticed you during a sunny afternoon in the library.
He was slaving over some physics homework, more boring than hard for him and he had let his eyes wander, just to distract himself for a moment.
You were sitting at his same table, facing him and a bit on his right side; you had a fortress of books around you and were furiously taking notes, that’s what had made him stop his gaze: how hard you were studying.
Michael knows many people come to the library as a mean to see and be seen by their peer, others truly try to work and can’t hold their focus for too long you, on the other end, didn’t look like the kind of person who would truly work their arse off so early in the semester, yet there you were, making use of the ridiculous amount of colorful post – it notes in your possession. He had snickered when noticing the animal themed stationery you were using and but hey! You shouldn't judge the book from his cover, right?
Almost absentmindedly, he had started looking for you, when at the library, just to see if he was right in his early observation, and you kept surprising him with the way you would single – mindedly concentrate on your work.
One afternoon, it was very late and most people were already gone, he had taken a peak at your notes, while you were looking for another book, curious to know what you were studying with such a passion and discovered it had to do with linguistics. He had no idea what your coursework talked about, but a quick look at your scrambled handwriting, revealed him a smart mind. This was his tipping point, when he had decided that he wanted to get to know you, if only he had the slightest idea how to!
He had never thought that, casually, sitting nearby you would have been stalkerish, it’s just that he doesn’t know how to start a conversation with you, he’s not that kind of guy! If you were in one of his courses, he would have found a way to get to know you better, but you don’t, and you pay your fellow students no mind, when you are at the library. What’s a guy to do but keep an eye on you, waiting for the right moment to act?
After the whole ‘Fuck science’ shenanigans, he had thought you must have caught wind of what he was doing and maybe you would have started something yourself, but you didn’t. Until tonight.
You realize how embarrassing your position is, when his hands fly on your hips to still your movements, and you register his hardening cock against your wet pussy (and when did that happen?)
“Are you done?” He asks, piercing eyes fixated on yours. “I’m Michael, since you wanted to greet me properly. What’s your name?”
You stare at him dumbly. What have you just done?
His hands curl on the meat of your hips and you yelp in surprise. You need to abort this mission, immediately, but now he’s the one who’s not letting you go.
“So?” He says mockingly. “You were in such a hurry to invade my space, and now you’re acting shy?”
He is well aware of how ridiculous the whole setup is, that he should let go, but you are staring at him with wide, surprised eyes, that he can’t help himself and see how far you’ll let him go.
“Talking big from the guy who’s been stalking me for weeks!”
You’re desperately trying to find your footing again; what the hell were you thinking?
“I wasn’t stalking you! You’re truly hard to know!”
“What?”
You need to check your bearings for a second: when did you fall in a Beckett play?
“I just said that you are hard to know.”
“And you thought that… whatever that was, was an actual good idea? Aren’t you supposed to be the smart guy?”
“You are acting dumb yourself, love, straddling your supposed stalker like that!”
The whole situation is so surreal, that the two of you stare at one another, and start laughing, until you are both breathless, and your faces are incredibly close.
He is pretty, extremely so, long eyelashes and high cheekbones, a beautiful, kissable mouth when it’s not curled in his signature, mocking smile. His eyes are slightly unfocused, the brilliant blue losing against the expanding pupil. And he is so warm, his hands on your hips clench and unclench, following the fast rhythm of his breathing.
You hadn’t realize how handsome he is and now he is taking your breath away.
He licks his dry lips and you can’t help but follow the motion, imagining how his tongue would feel against your cunt. Without you even noticing, your hips start moving again against the rough material of his jeans, your lips hovering over his, his hands pushing your closer against his hard cock, you two moan, lips almost touching and he decides to take the matter in his own hands.
Grabbing your nape, he pulls your face towards his, tongue entering your parted mouth without asking for permission, seeking your clumsily, and you let him take the wheel.
He’s desperate in the way he is kissing you, no finesse or control, just his mouth slanted against yours, his tongue fucking your throat and his hands in your hair to keep you where he wants you. You’ve been kissed better, but never with such a passion and need. You can barely breath, your body crushed against his, and you don’t care.
You are both breathless when your lips part, a thin line of spit connecting the two of you.
“Please, tell me you have a condom.” You beg, your forehead finding home against his.
“I don’t. I’ve never -”
The embarrassment in his voice stops you.
Oh Christ on a bike, you think, oh fuck. This, you didn’t expect. Not that you’re an expert yourself, only having a past relationship to account for, but your ex hadn’t been a virgin, you were.
“I’m sorry.” You say, trying to dismount, to no avail, his hands are like manacles on your hips.
“Stay.”
The way he says it, he’s not begging you, he’s telling you what to do and you feel it in your cunt, molten heath growing there, expanding in your tummy, turning your legs into jelly.
“I’m not going to have unprotected sex.”
Michael cocks his head to the side, his eyes dark with need.
Never, not even in his wildest dreams, he had imagined to find himself in this position. If he’s not going to have sex with you, and he will not without a condom, he’s not stupid, he still wants to quench the thirst he sees in your eyes and feels in his own loins.
“Me neither.” He pushes you downward against his painfully hard cock, the friction delicious and cruel.
You hide a moan against his neck, your lips landing where his pulse is, sucking the sweaty skin with desperation. You start canting your hips again against the rough material of his jeans, his hands helping you find the right angle against his erection, pain and pleasure take possession of your body, your lips desperate on his, your teeth biting his lower lip and he forces you even tighter against his crotch and it hurts, the pleasure burns your skin when he grinds your hips, your clit feeling the brunt of his punishment even through the layers your are wearing. Your hands grab his hair and his hide under your skirt, his long fingers grabbing your ass, squeezing hard, nails catching in worn fabric: he needs you, needs to become one with you.
He whimpers when you bite his shoulder through his sweater, one hand finds its way under your jumper and rakes down your back, you whimper, so close, so close.
Your orgasm shatters you, your teeth biting Michael’s shoulder harder and deeper as he keeps rutting against you; you want to tell him it’s too much but he’s making delicious sounds, half strangled moans of pleasure that inflame your body again, a smaller orgasm hitting you when he comes, his face hidden against your neck.
“Is anyone there?”
The haziness of pleasure is broken the second you hear footsteps heading in your direction, and panic follows.
Mrs Daniels, the librarian pokes her head in the small alcove at the far end of the library.
“Sorry to interrupt you.” She says. “Did you hear strange sounds just now?”
The two students stare owlishly at her: poor kids must be studying their arses off. They look like they’ve just ran a marathon, hair sticking at weird angles, and the boy’s cheeks are apple red. Youngsters these days!
“No. We were having a chat, a little break.” Says the one behind a huge row of books.
“Yeah, we were just chatting.” Adds the one she thinks is named Michael, with a smile she can’t truly decipher.
“Oh well, I must have been mistaken then, there’s only the two of you around at this point. Goodnight then.”
The second you two are positive the older woman is far away enough, you two start laughing, barely hiding your guffaws behind your hands.
“Well.” You manage to finally say. “That was close!”
You try not to feel embarrassed when your eyes land on Michael, whose stare is piercing behind his thick glasses.
“Yeah. And I still don’t know your name.”
Heath pools in your lower tummy at the way his voice is low and raspy, desire clear in the way he rakes his eyes down your body.
��You can always come by my dorm and find out.”
Christ, the way Michael’s lips curve, tells you he’s going to discover more than your name tonight.
Everythig taglist: @hightowhxre
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upsidedownwithsteve · 7 months
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Love Sucks III. The Hunt
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Vampire!Steve Harrington x fem!reader He’s just a gloomy, little guy.
The Masterlist 🩸
Honestly, it probably didn’t help that everyone was standing in a line, a front row audience to what Steve deemed a very nerve wracking moment in his afterlife. 
“Ignore them, son,” Wayne gruffed, waving a dismissive hand at his nephew and all his friends. 
“But, Eddie has a camera,” Steve responded with weak offence. Eddie grinned and waved, the video camera balanced against his shoulder. He refused to answer to anyone who asked where he got it from, but Nancy spoke loud and frostily about a handheld that had been stolen from the newspaper’s office last week. “He keeps pointing it at me.”
Eddie laughed. 
You stepped in, scowling at your friends and smoothing your hands over Steve’s cheeks in what you hoped was a calming gesture. He was cold, almost icy, that forever faded summer tan paler than ever. His eyes were bloodshot, the skin underneath rose and lavender. He looked more like a vampire than ever. 
He was hungry. 
“Hey, hey,” you were frowning, something Steve hated to see on you but you were growing more concerned by the day. “I can tell them to leave, if you want?”
Steve glanced over at the kids, all sitting with snacks and chatting excitedly, their boots covered in mud and buried in the piles of leaves. Robin was perched on a low tree branch beside Jonathan and Nancy was talking to Hopper about the deer population. 
“No, it’s okay,” Steve murmured. His words sounded slurred, sluggish, too thick for his dry mouth. “You’ll stay back though, right? I don’t want to hu—”
You let your hands trail down his shoulders, catching his cold fingers and squeezing. “You won’t,” you promised him. “But you need to eat. Let Wayne and Jim help you, yeah? Rabbits aren’t cutting it anymore, handsome.”
And they weren’t, Steve knew that. And he hated how sad he got once he bit into their soft fur, the small amount of blood not doing much more than breaking his heart. You told Wayne about it one day when he came back from hunting and the older man huffed and ranted tiredly about the overgrown population of deer, elk, wolves. 
“Tell your boyfriend to catch some of those and we won’t have a problem.”
Except Steve had stared wide eyed at you at the suggestion. “An elk? I don’t know how to catch one of those.”
And that’s why you and your friends were in the middle of the woods on an October afternoon, just before evening fell. Hopper had swept the clearing for other hunters, dog walkers, campers and once he was satisfied, he gave Wayne a thumbs up. 
“Okay, let’s go, Dracula,” Wayne announced and Steve frowned, offended. He pointed. “You see it’s neck? That’s where you wanna aim, got it?”
The “neck” was non-existent. Joyce Byers’ old exercise bike was sitting in the mud, padded out with pillows tied with string. Someone (Mike) had draped a blanket over it and someone else (Max) stuck branches to the handles, faux antlers, much to Steve’s dismay. He spared a glance back at you, looking forlorn before Wayne snapped his fingers and whistled. 
“Hey, concentrate. You wanna jump it, right? Now you don’t got no gun, or crossbows, but I know there’s some heavy weaponry in that mouth of yours, so you gotta use it.”
Steve looked glum, lifting his fingers to rub at the sharp fangs he’d let protrude from his gums. They felt brittle and dry, ready to feed. You stepped closer, nudging yourself into Steve’s space until you could wrap your arms around his waist. He was icy under his shirt, almost too told to touch but you loved the way he relaxed into you at the touch of your hands, warm and soft, sneaking up the insides of his sweater. 
So Steve nodded and then the rest of the evening was spent in a mess of semi-hilarity and frustration. Steve scowled and kicked at the dead leaves as Hopper egged him on and Robin and Wayne took turns in pretending to attack the bike, throwing themselves at the pillow padding, miming biting the fake neck. 
Eddie caught everything on camera. 
Eventually Steve relented and you watched as he paced around the fake animal, sulky looking with his red rimmed eyes and frown. But he seemed to move a little faster than you’d see him do before, his movements not superhuman, but definitely unnatural. Then he’d pounce, throw himself onto the bike and swear as pillows fell off the sides, the makeshift antlers poking him in the ribs as he scrambled for the bike's handles/neck. 
People cheered, Eddie cackled, you kissed his pale cheek and Steve rolled his eyes with the impatience and embarrassment of a teenager going to his first prom. 
“This is stupid,” he muttered but the next night he slipped into the woods to feed and he came back satiated. 
He returned covered in mud and pine needles, with a drop of blood or two on his jeans and his shirt was torn from a scuffle from an animal that he deemed a monstrous size, but your boyfriend was pleased with himself and that’s all that mattered. 
Two days later, Eddie made him watch Bambi on the VCR and Steve was horrified, declaring that he was going vegetarian.  
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