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heyidkyay · 8 months

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I guess I’ll take this pain, instead of your name |

Part Twenty-Eight - End

A/n: Ah finally 28 is here!! I'm sorry for the silence, had a lot going on recently, but this is the final part of the series! I can't believe it tbh, though I wouldn't mind writing a few extra scenes in the future just because I love these two a whole lot. But we'll seeee!

Just a warning, this is very similar to the flashback chapters on 24 and the scenes are as the years pass starting from before the time G and Birdie got together, it's ALL from G's POV which was so fucking difficult to write but hopefully I pulled it off. Either way, I hope you enjoy it and thank you to all the love everyone's shown this series, it means so much.

Summary: In life, things changed. The boys you'd once grown up with were men now, and famous ones at that. The type that toured the world and had millions of adoring fans.

The five of you shared a shit ton of history. But you also shared a lot of mixed emotions for one of them in particular, a certain drummer.

Masterlist

It was beaming. First proper hot day they’d had in months. Though in truth, it could’ve just as easily been years seeing as though every weather station was currently claiming a ‘hellish heatwave’ to have taken over the entire country.

It was bittersweet.

George was sat outside on the decking, just by the pool in Matty’s back garden with the rest of the band, Ross in a pair of boxers perched on the waters edge with Adam sporting a pair of bright yellow swim trunks right beside him. The two of them had been doing laps but had seemingly tired themselves out under the hot sun and were now kicking up a lazy wave in the shallow end.

“Oi.”

George glanced away from the duo to find a beer being shoved his way, he took the crisp bottle with a soundless nod just as Matty settled into the lounge chair next to him.

“You not getting in then?” The older boy asked him and George curled his lip just as he wrinkled his nose.

“Maybe. Too fucking hot to be arsed though.” He answered, sticky with sweat but enjoying the warmth the summer weather had to gift him.

Matty laughed under his breath and kicked his leg up to cross it over his knee. “Mum ordered food, if you’re hungry. Lou wanted pizza, so.”

George smiled in retort. He’d skipped breakfast that morning, knowing his presence would only lead to more problems now that his mum was home again, and had been hoping to grab something on the way over but hadn’t had the chance.

“Speak of the devil.” Matty chuckled after and George followed his gaze over to find his younger brother, Louis, scuttling out of the patio’s sliding glass door, water gun in hand and a leggy teenage girl just behind him.

“Get back here, Lou! You’re so dead!” The girl shouted, hair dripping wet and shirt dampened from where she’d obviously been the subject to one of Louis’s antics, but her words were counteracted by the dazzling grin she wore and the bright sheen she had to her eyes.

The younger boy she was chasing cackled loudly in return, face alive as he zoomed past George and Matty on the loungers in an attempt to escape her. But she was hot on his heels.

“Run, mate!” Matty called out unhelpfully, snorting when his little brother tried to make a song and dance out of it when he chose to go around the garden table a few times.

George chuckled quietly, watching the duo from where he was perched, though he could hardly keep his eyes off of the girl, focused on her expression, the way she moved so effortlessly. Matty seemed to notice it too.

“You’ve got it bad, man.”

George startled a tad at his voice but shook his head anyway as he waved Matty’s accusation off, not bothering to argue against it seeing as though his eyes were still trained on one thing.

Besides, it weren’t as though he hadn’t heard it all before, the lads loved to tease him for his apparent staring, the longing looks he threw her, but how could he help it? She was this blazing ball of fire, too fucking hot to reach out and touch, but enticing all the same.

God, he was such a fucking sap.

Matty was still laughing, either at him or the way his younger brother’s face had suddenly fallen in quick realisation, perhaps both, but George could hardly bring himself to care. It’s not like she ever noticed his attention anyway, barely even spared him a hello, let alone a second glance.

“Just talk to her, man. She won’t bite.” Matty told him, as though it was really that simple. But before George could think of a reply, a loud scream echoed out across the garden and he looked up just in time to spot the pair go catapulting into the pool, the girl’s arms wrapped around the younger boy’s shoulders as their bodies cut through the water. “Fucking hell.”

The pair of them were laughing when they reemerged, Louis spluttering whilst the girl just shook the hair out of her face, smile still frozen in place. George’s breath got caught in the back of his throat and his mind went a little fuzzy at the sight of it, witnessing how carefree and gorgeous she always seemed to appear, but especially then.

“You cheat! You can’t do that!” Louis laughed in argument, splashing about a bit. “It ain’t fair.”

The girl merely grinned in retort and reached out to mess the boy’s sodden hair up further, “Sure I can, Lou. An eye for an eye and all that! You wet me with your gun and I tossed you in the pool. Sounds fair enough to me.”

“She’s got you there, mate.” George heard Ross add from the side of the pool, and could hear the mirth that lined his mate’s voice. “Take it like a champ.”

“You get to say that, you’re already soaked!”

“Tell him, Lou!” Matty hollered with that mischievous smile he often favoured.

The girl waded in the water and threw a smirk at Matty, but her eyes lingered on George too for just a second. “You lot getting in or am I gonna have to drag you over too?”

Matty laughed and went to make a stand, but just as he did, he turned his back on the rest of them and shot a sly remark at George, who was still trying to get over the acknowledgment he’d just been given. “Bet you’d love that though, Georgie. Fucking flustered at the very thought, ain’t you?”

George scowled, though he could only watch on as Matty waltzed away, chuckles still bright. He huffed instead and dragged a pitiful hand across his face in hopes to get ahold of himself. But Matty was right, he could feel the warmth of the blush down the length of his back and felt like such a tit for always reacting to the tiniest of interactions she had to offer him.

“Come on, G! Getting old here!”

He swallowed heavily at the sound of her voice, but didn’t dare look up just yet. G. It was a first, that was for sure. Hadn’t really stuck around anywhere long enough to make many friends, let alone have a nickname surface. He only hoped it’d stick, especially if she was the one calling out for him.

“I’m coming!” He said after a quick breath and only then chanced a glance, surprised to find her wild eyes still set on him. She flashed him a pleased grin and- “Shit.” He murmured to himself, almost stilling in place at the realisation that hit him. He was so fucking gone, wasn’t he?

—

London was different to Wilmslow, George had decided. Busier. You could hear the noise of the city at night sneak in through the front bedroom window, and feel the shake of the trains that ran across the back of the lane all through the house. It was nice though, these differences. The City. The noise. Mostly because the quiet never had sat well with him.

“Oi, those carrots won’t cut themselves, you know.”

George found himself smiling at the sound of Dee’s voice and pulled his gaze away from the open back door to see her grinning back at him. She was currently cooking up a storm, spices scattered everywhere and water bubbling from a metal pot sat up on the hob, but she’d wanted to make her famous shepherd’s pie for her favourite niece during their stay, and somehow he’d gotten roped into helping.

Not that he’d ever say no, he’d grown fond of the two women that had welcomed him in with open arms far too quickly- but that was without mentioning the lighthearted threats that had been given if he dared even step a toe out of line with her. Or at least, he hoped they were lighthearted.

“Daydreamin’?”

He hummed in return and went back to his kitchen duties, skinning the orange vegetables and then dicing. “Something like that.”

Dee mimicked the sound with a faint titter of her own and he watched closely as she glanced back out the door and into the garden, seeing the scene he’d been so absorbed in.

Nana (“Can’t be callin’ me by nothing else, my darlin’, family’s family and you’re it now.” Is what she’d claimed from the very start, not drawing any attention to the hitched breath George had given in turn) was perched in a deck chair, one of those fabric ones with the silver metal legs and striped cloth backing, a shovel in one hand and a pot in the other. Cyril, who seemed content to laze about in the hazy summer heat, was sprawled out on the grass right beside her, drool dripping from his open jaw and eyes closed. Nana kept patting his belly every few minutes but he didn’t care to move from his slumber.

Birdie was right there with them as well, only she was knee deep in the flowerbeds, soil painting the skin up to her elbows and blackening the overalls she’d adorned earlier. The pink spade she’d picked out was lost somewhere to the left of her and she was squinting in the afternoon sun, attention drifting back and forth between the flowers they were planting and the seventy-three year old giving out orders. They appeared to be speaking about something or other now though, Birdie trying hard to keep her mouth from lifting into an embarrassed sort of smile whilst Nana merely chuckled away.

“How’s she really been?” Dee quizzed him, plopping the carrots he’d cut into another pot before tossing the steaming potatoes that had just been boiled. The question was oddly quiet for her, enough for George to notice at least, seeing as though the woman had been nothing but a rocket since the minute they’d met.

He wondered if she knew, albeit vaguely. But then shook the thought away, if either of these women knew anything that had been going on back home there’d surely be hell to pay. That he understood. Still, it wasn’t his secret to tell and Birdie had been adamant about it, even after hearing his incentives.

“She’s been alright, keeping busy in truth. Got exams soon.”

The red-haired woman hummed again, staring off into space for a moment before those piercing eyes of hers were drilled into his. He fought not to outwardly react.

“Doesn’t seem alright, what with her walking in all battered and bruised. Looks more smurf-like than human to me.”

George swallowed, stuck on what to say, and it wasn’t like he had something to preoccupy himself with now that the carrots were gone. He sighed softly. “She’s… alright- strong, really. Just a lot going on at school, you know? And her mum’s been busy.”

Dee’s tongue prodded the inside of her cheek at that but turned back to fork the mince she was frying. “Never did like her much. But especially after the funeral.” She revealed and looked almost as though she was gritting her teeth to get the words out. “Din’t come to the reception. Just left little Dove here with us and got on the first train home. Could understand, somewhat. Woman had lost a husband, hadn’t she? But then, I’d lost my brother. Mum, a son, and that little girl out there, well, she’d lost her dad. Her mum didn’t want much responsibility for her afterwards, hardly saw the arse-end of her in the long months after. A visit once in a blue moon and a phone call each Thursday. Honestly believed the kid would stay living here with us, until she swanned back in and swept her back up north.”

A silence settled in the breath Dee took then and George’s emotions warred within. He choked them back and swallowed them down to brew.

“Fought hard to keep her, din’t think the woman was capable of lookin’ after herself, let alone a kid. But,” Dee shrugged then, helplessly. “She’s her mum, ain’t she? Not much we could do about it. Lost touch a bit after that, she wanted distance, said we reminded her too much of him. Claimed our Dove couldn’t stomach the reminder either. So we listened. For her sake if nothing else. Killed my mum though.”

George swallowed thickly. “Can imagine. I don’t know how I’d act if I ever lost her.”

Dee seemed to pause at that, then turned to regard him slowly and with a very sweet smile, one George had never been gifted by an adult in his lifetime. It threw him.

“You’re a good sort, Georgie. Look after her well, don’t you?” Her noiseless chuckle surprised him but then she just shook her head, obviously not expecting an actual answer. He watched on as she inhaled slowly only to then throw the tea towel she’d been clinging onto over her shoulder, wiping the underneaths of her eyes. He didn't know what to say or how to make things better. “Start mashing those spuds for me, would ya doll? Just gonna nip to the loo.”

George could only nod, surprised by the whole event but especially upon seeing Dee suddenly so choked up. He didn’t have much time to dwell on it though, seeing as though Birdie came swanning into the kitchen just after her Aunt had disappeared.

The girl was smiling happily, happier than he’d seen her in a long while, ever even. It made him stop short, if only to take her in. The freckles on her cheeks that the sun had warmed and strengthened. The cheeky smile that dimpled the right corner of her mouth. The wrinkle in her nose that stood out amongst the gentle burn that dotted its bridge…

The twinkle in her eyes as she zeroed in on him.

“Where’s Aunt Dee?” The girl asked, picking up a pea-pod from off the counter and biting into it. George’s face wrinkled in amused anguish.

“Toilet.” He answered her, falling into one of the empty bar stools stood behind. “Finally decided to come help, have you then?”

She stepped closer and smirked up at him. “Nope.” The next bite she took made a massive crunching sound, her grin widened.

George rolled his eyes, before taking the chance to get another good look at her. If it weren’t for the fact that Nana was looming just beyond the door, he’d have kissed her.

The woman was a dainty thing, yes, but fucking terrifying too. And seeing as they’d yet to announce anything between them, let alone anyone else, he didn’t want to rock the boat too hard this early on. A few kisses were just a few kisses, right?

“What’s got you in a mard?” Birdie chuckled, reaching out a dirtied finger to poke at his cheek. He dipped away slightly from the offending hand but didn’t put up much of a fight, reckoned she could be covered in mouldy milk and he’d still want to snog her senseless.

“Nothing, just thinking.” He told her honestly.

She hummed and leaned in closer, pea-pod now gone and her hands tucked into the pockets of her overalls. She was trying to be intimidating, playful. He liked seeing her so alive.

“Try not to hurt yourself there.”

George chuckled, heart beating quicker now. “Always so mean.”

“Hm, maybe. But you like me for it.” She shot back confidently.

I do.

“Keep on wishing, B.”

She snorted, and it would’ve been an ugly sound on anyone else, but this was her. His Birdie.

“Oh, I will.” She half-sung, eyes really shimmering now beneath the long lashes they so often hid themselves behind.

George couldn’t find it in himself to look away, lost on her.

Then a hand was touching his and he felt something press into the palm of his. Her soil covered fingernails danced over the inside of his wrist for a single second just as she leant in to press her soft lips to his cheek.

A peck, a smile, and then she was gone it seemed.

George stared off after her, watched the way her hair fell loosely and how the light only seemed to carve a path for her through the dimly lit hallway. She disappeared round the bend and he took a breath before glancing down into his hand.

His mouth dried up at the sight of the old metal lighter which now sat there. And carved ever so carefully into the metal casing at the very bottom was a simple ‘B+G’.

—

“Move over.” Someone grunted somewhere to the right and George struggled against the urge to elbow his way into a more comfortable position. “Tossers.”

He huffed a bit at that but shuffled further left anyway, creating some more room for the giant twat sat on the other end of the backseat in hopes that it’d shut him up. Louis and Birdie were right there between them, Lou half on top of B, and B half on top of him.

Ross seemed to have gotten the better end of the stick in reality, even if his oversized limbs had been crammed into the back with them. Matty and Adam were more than alright though, happy as Larry sat in the front, fiddling with the radio.

“Will you lot shut up? Might miss it.” Matty snipped, batting away Hann’s hand when he tried to turn up the dial.

“Fuck off, Matty.” Ross shot right back, still sodding squirming. “How the fuck did you even manage to bag the front seat anyway? You’re about the size of my left toe.”

Louis snorted loudly at that, whilst Matty sent Ross a scathing look full of sarky laughter. “It’s my fucking car, that’s why, dickhead.”

Just as Ross drew in another breath to retaliate, Birdie swooped in to save the day, holding out an arm across Louis to signal for Ross to pack it in. “You’re both being annoying, just shut up and stop swearing, yeah? Otherwise we’ll never hear the sodding radio and Denise will have all our heads.”

“Mum says a lot worse.” Louis intoned then, which had them all snickering and Matty high-fiving his little brother whilst looking proud. George hit his head against the window when Birdie ducked slightly to avoid being hit, she winced at the sound it made.

“Sorry, babe.” She whispered and leant in closer to rub the top of his head gently with a soft laugh. No one else was appeared go be paying much attention to them though, all the focus honed in on the radio.

At first, both him and Hann had argued against getting in the car- could’ve just as easily gathered around the stereo in the kitchen for this- but Matt, Birdie and Ross had been dead set on hearing it in the car.

“It’s got to be in the car! We can’t not hear it in the car!” Matty had argued, and not just for the sake of it, only to have then been cut off by B and her rapid agreement, “Exactly! It’s a car song! People only ever listen to the radio when they’re drivin’!” Her accent was always stronger the more determined she got. “So we’re listening to it in the car whether you lot wanna or not, I don’t care if your balls get squished or your elbows don’t fit. We are.”

And that had been it. Enough said.

“You’re alright.” George chuckled under his breath, taking her hand in his and pulling them both down into his lap. She seemed content enough to cuddle further into his side at that and he couldn’t even bring himself to mind, thumbing her knuckles whilst he rested his chin atop her head.

“Oh shit, here it is! It’s coming on!”

“Fuck. Fuck. Fuuccck.”

“Shut the fuck up!!”

“Think I’m gonna shit myself.”

Birdie and Louis laughed at their many reactions and George could only cling on a little tighter to the hand that was keeping him grounded. Never had he felt so fucking sick with nerves.

“Shut up you lot, it’s on! It’s on!”

The car fell dead silent at Birdie’s interruption and they all seemed to lean forward in their seats simultaneously, as though it would give them a better chance at listening in.

“Yeah, and here’s a new one for you.” Huw Stephens’s voice rang out and George could barely believe that they were actually this close, “Just in, and from their recent EP titled Facedown, we’ve got the up and coming sound of The 1975 for you lovely ladies and gentlemen! Buzzing with this one boys, reckon the rest of you will be too. So here it is, this is BBC Radio 1 and up next is The City.”

The whole lot of them broke out into hollers and cheers when the intro played, the entire car bouncing on its wearing tires as they all started to prat about in their excitement. Ross close to shaking Hann’s chair out of its hinges, Louis jumping between the two front seats to turn the dial up even louder, Matty drumming loudly against the dash, Adam kicking his feet, and B, his beautiful B, screaming her heart out for them all as she laughed and clapped and started to sing as loudly as she possibly could alongside Matty’s voice that’d started playing through the speakers.

And all George could think was, fuck.

—

“You’ve gotta run faster!”

“I fucking am!”

“You’re not!” She laughed, the Californian sun warming every inch of her even as it begun to set, “Faster, G!”

“Please, none of that! Hear enough of it back in the bunks, thanks!” Came Matty’s witty quip, earning a few knowing laughs. George turned around to flip him off for it but Birdie appeared to have beaten him to it.

“Jealous much, Matthew?”

“Of G? ‘Course, darling!” Matty quipped as he moved across the sand to drape himself across her back, spliff caught between his fingers. “Should’ve jumped you way back when I had the chance.”

Birdie snorted and elbowed him lightly but didn’t force him away, “Meant of me, you twat. Figured if I hadn’t gotten there first, you might’ve tried your luck with G, Matt.”

“Oh how I wish!” Matty dramatised, sighing loudly as he casted a set of seductive eyes in George’s direction, “Always been gone on you though, our George. I never stood a chance.”

“Yeah, so piss off of her.” George told the curly haired idiot with a small smirk as he made his way back over, a bright orange kite still wrapped around his hand.

Matty took it as his chance to play the joker though and all but dived for him the second he got close enough, planting a sloppy kiss to the side of his face. George couldn’t help the unmanly sound that escaped him at the gesture and could only laugh along with the rest of them when he shoved the clingy lad off.

“Got me good, you prick.” He chuckled, swiping at his wet cheek.

“And that’s only the start of it, mate.” Matty winked, then made his way back over to where the rest of the band had sprawled about on the sand. “Just imagine it, G! I’d even let you top, you know. A proper giver me.”

Ross cackled at the face Georgemade and Hann rolled his eyes with a smile that couldn’t be helped when Matty dropped himself down beside him, though he took the offered joint with no fuss.

“Can just picture the utter chaos it’d cause.” Ross choked out, sighing happily as he kicked his legs out before him, grinning at the very thought.

“I’m alright, thanks.” George felt the need to mention as he wrapped an arm around Birdie’s waist, smiling when the girl melted into him, then let up on the string of the kite when her fingers asked for it.

It’d been her idea of course, the kites. Got three of them whilst they’d been stuck in sound check one morning and brought them back to the venue alongside a shit ton of food. They’d only remembered them a couple days later when everyone had decided to spend a free night out on the beach, just them drinking and enjoying what little time they had when not performing.

“Ah, well you’re the one who’ll be missing out, man!” Matty replied with a lazy smirk and George could only laugh, swaying slightly now as he rested his chin atop the girl’s sun-warmed hair.

“Reckon I’ve already got my hands quite full here, mate.”

“And what’s that meant to mean?” Birdie immediately questioned with a raised brow as she turned in his grip to better face him, “‘Cause I’m pretty sure it’s the other way round, mate.”

“Oh yeah?” George humoured her, he hadn’t even meant anything by it, loved her more than he did the air itself in fact, but it was always fun rilling her up a bit. “How so?”

“Well, you’re proper clingy for one.”

George hissed through his teeth as though wounded, whilst the others oohed.

“Got you there.” Hann snickered and the others appeared to agree. Was he really that bad?

“And two, you don’t think through half the shit you say sometimes.”

George raised a brow at that.

“Yeah, don’t fucking act like it ain’t true!” She argued with the tiny beginnings of a smile, “The amount of times I’ve had to talk you out of a corner. The lot of yous in fact.”

“Oi, this is rinse G hour, not us!” Matty frowned and threw a thumbs down at them. “TOMATO. TOMATO.”

With a snort, Birdie spun back towards the curly haired freak, “Did you just shout tomato?”

“Yeah,” Matty shrugged, nicking back the joint off Adam that had dwindled down to all but a nub, “Had none to throw, did I?”

Birdie looked towards the sky. “God save me.”

And just like that, the whole band started belting out a Sex Pistols classic in unison.

“God save the queen! She’s not a human being! And there’s no future! And England’s dreamin’!”

“Fucking idiots.” She sighed, but the attention soon diverged when a rowdy crowd started making themselves known a little further down the beach.

They all shared a look, knowing it’d be best to head back to the bus before they were soon spotted and mobbed, all groaning unhappily as they forced themselves up onto their feet. George started on the clear up, seeing as though he was already standing, Birdie following just behind him whilst the other boys gathered up the beer and whatever else they’d procured.

Starting the trek back to the bus, stationed just past the marina, George allowed the others to walk on ahead a bit and fell into step with B, wrapping an arm around her shoulders whilst they slowly followed behind.

“You know, you looked proper fit running up and down that beach.”

He chuckled at the sudden remark and let her wind an arm around his waist to better allow her body to mould into his. “Yeah, kite an’ all?”

He felt, more than heard her laugh, before she hummed. The vibration of it rippled across the skin just beneath her head. “Defo. Though you could’ve done without all these extra layers.” She replied, then tugged at the hem of his tee to further drill home her point.

“It’s autumn, B, fucking chilly too. You really expect me to go full Baywatch on the beach just to appease you, ey?”

“‘Course.” She answered and he could tell she was smirking by the wave in her tone. “You look good, should show it off more often.”

He didn’t have much of a reply to offer that. Though it wasn’t because she’d caught him off guard, per say, it was just that he still wasn’t used to the way she so openly complimented him, on everything he did, to each and every way he looked. He’d never had that before. But she gave it to him freely, without cost, without expectation.

“Stop flirting with me.” Is what he decided on when he couldn’t find it in himself to dampen the grin he was now sporting. She peered up at him, wearing a sly smile of her own.

“Why, does it get you all flustered?” She teased, obviously pleased with herself as she poked his ribs. He pinched her hip softly in retaliation and laughed when she wrinkled her nose up at him.

“No, I’m just resisting the urge to bend you over on this beach.”

But hey, just because her comments had him flushing like a teenage boy, didn’t mean that he couldn’t give it back twice as bad. Plus, he loved seeing her melt, the way her cheeks would tint that pretty pink colour and how she’d start to chew on her bottom lip simply to keep from smiling.

“You’ll pay for that when we’re back on the bus.”

“Promise?” He snarked back with another chuckle, tugging her in closer.

She hummed once more, fingers playing with the hand that fell from her shoulder now. “Have to keep it down though, don’t need Matty interrupting.”

George’s lip curled, “Nah, on second thought, I’ll just wait for a venue loo stall.”

He laughed happily when she elbowed his side. “Charming.”

—

It was mayhem. Proper, honest to God mayhem. And he’d no idea how things had gotten so out of hand, who half the people traipsing through his living room even were, but he was fucking happy if nothing else. Over the moon, even.

“Geee!”

George glanced to his left just in time to spot a drunken Matty stumbling his way on over, the man clung to his shoulders the first chance he got and grinned up at him. He reeked of beer and wine.

“So fucking pleased for you, mate. Did I mention that already? Just, proper buzzing for you.” The drunkard rambled, eyes squinted from the extremity of his smile.

George chuckled and wrapped an arm around the shorter lad, happy to accommodate his need for comfort as well as keep him upright. Matty was touchy on a good day, but when you’d got a good few drinks in him he was like a sloth to a tree branch.

“You did mention it, mate.” George replied and withheld his amusement when Matty frowned, “But I appreciate it. Really.”

The frown then etched itself into a smile at that, all fond and goofy as Matty wiggled even closer into his embrace, “Good. Fucking deserve it. You and her both, yeah?”

With a harsh sallow, George felt that tightness he’d been feeling in his chest as of late rise. “Thanks, mate.” He croaked out and then coughed to clear his throat.

Deserve. It was a difficult thing for him to come to terms with, deeming what he did and didn’t deserve. A struggle he’d been dealing with his whole life, and which had only tripled in recent years. The flat was something he’d earned, something both he and Birdie had talked about since they’d both been teenagers. An escape. But they’d already gone and done that, hadn’t they? Left Wilmslow behind, left everyone who didn’t matter behind. Did it make them better than? Safer now? George’s mind was always at war with his head, but as of late, as the band only grew, and as life continued on, it only seemed to get louder.

“Fuckin’ sickkk too!”

Matty’s drunken nonsense pulled him back from his scattered thoughts then and George smiled down at his mate. The flat was sick, they’d spent weeks searching for the right one, him and B, travelled all over London looking, and then they’d found this one. It wasn’t huge, nothing too fancy or grand, but it was home. And neither one of them had ever had much of that.

“Ross, tell him! Tell him it’s sick!” Matty shouted again, having just spotted Ross making his way through the crowd. The giant looked well on his way to pissed too, but seemed to be holding on quite well. George reckoned it was simply down to his height.

“It’s sick!” Ross easily repeated, grinning and letting Matty grab onto him too before the idiot saw someone else he knew and started walking away, calling out promises to find them again soon. Ross leaned in to him then and murmured, “What’s sick?”

George breathed a chuckle through his nose and just shook his head, Ross knew better than to prod any further.

“Flat is looking good by the way, mate. Dunno who half of these fuckers are though.” The bassist commented, glancing out around the room.

George could only agree, “Fuck if I do. Pretty sure Grimmy invited a couple dozen of his mates with him.”

Ross started nodding rapidly at that, raising his beer as he did. “Yeah, spotted that Harry Styles in your loo.”

“In my loo?”

“In your loo.”

“The fuck were you doing in my bathroom with Harry Styles, Ross?” George questioned his mate, bewildered now, but even with the state of him, George knew that Ross could make friends with just about anyone. Send the man into a den full of hungry hyenas and he’d walk out with a pal for life.

Ross simply shrugged, “He was coming out, I was going in, he liked my hair.”

George lifted his eyebrows and pursed his lips, as though that made any sense, “Oh right, yeah.”

Ross hummed then perked up again, “Here she is. The lady of the hour!”

Following the direction of the man’s gaze, George grinned and felt the rest of the room dampen down to a droning droll around him as Birdie walked on over, bottle of wine in tucked under her arm.

“Wahey! Would you look at that!” Ross greeted her cheerfully, roping the girl into a warm hug, “You’ve finally come to see me!”

“I saw you-“ She paused and hiccuped with a half-arsed glare, “-ages ago, you big knobhead.”

“Oof.” Ross sounded, clasping a hand over his hurt heart, “Alright, sorry! Just missed you is all, only had like five minutes with you by the door.”

Birdie pouted then, and George knew she was truly sloshed by the real tears he saw well in her eyes.

“I’m sorry, Ro! I haven’t had the chance. There’s all these people here annoying me.” She waved her hand around aimlessly above her head, squinting as she did, before she then huffed. She turned towards George then, all but stepping on his toes to get in his space, not that he minded, “Did you know One Direction are here? In my flat?”

“Our flat.” George corrected with a tiny grin whilst she necked another few gulps of wine.

“What I said, ain’t it?” Birdie retorted, glancing about the room again. “Can you believe Zayn fucking Malik tried to give me a joint too? And I said-“ She hiccuped again then and George reached out to steady her slight;y, “-I told him, right, I said but you’re just a baby! And he laughed at me, G. Laughed! I almost told him that that one song of theirs was shit, but I didn’t. Felt bad for even thinking it. You know?”

Ross was snickering away to the left of them, obviously pleased with the state of their best mate, whilst George attempted to cajole the wine bottle from out under her arm.

“He’s the fit one, ain’t he?”

“They’re all bloody fit, Ross!” Birdie argued with the idiot whilst George sighed, wondering where on Earth he’d found the pair of them, “Got to be ‘cause all them girls love ‘em. Like you lot, I ‘spose.”

That startled quite the laugh out of Ross and he swayed nearer, “You ‘spose? I’m fucking hurt here, are you saying we’re not fit, B?”

She rolled her eyes as though she was annoyed with him for not understanding what she’d meant and groaned, “No, you are fit. Just not as fit as them, yeah?”

George snorted but had finally managed to snag the bottle loose, she frowned and went to take it back, though he seemed to be able to distract her with his next question, “Not fit enough am I, Birdie? Why d’ya not ask one of them to move in with you then?”

The crease between her brow deepened at his ask and her hands came up to wrap themselves around his neck, “‘Cause they’re babies! I’ve just said this, G. Aren’t you listenin’?”

“Think they’re only a couple years younger.” Ross countered but he put his hands up in surrender when Birdie retorted with, “Exactly. Babies, Ross! Tiny little goblin children.”

“Right, yeah. ‘Course.”

George sighed again, “Think it’s time for you to get to bed, B.”

“What? No!” The girl squawked and stumbled in his hold as she reeled backwards, “I’m fine, completeeeely fine! So fine, in fact, that I bet I could do a backflip. Right here. Right now.”

“You can’t do a backflip even when sober, sweetheart.”

“I can too.” She pouted, retracting her arms from around his neck even though he’d yet to relinquish his hold on her. He laughed at her adamancy on the subject though and determined that he’d have to remind her once she’d sobered up.

“Sure, B.” He soothed, carding a gentle hand through her messy hair and tucking a loose strand behind her ear.

“You’re really pretty though, G. Like so pretty I feel the need to bark or something. Like a dog would at a squirrel.”

Ross actually lost his footing upon hearing that and spat what little dregs of drink that remained in his mouth out onto their brand new floor. “Bark??” He questioned her, and even though George was just as baffled as he was, he had the fucking common sense not to quiz a drunken twat. No matter how lovely they were.

“Was that a bit much?” Birdie asked him, smiling dopily now as she started to deflate, leaning more heavily into George’s side. Ross made a face and George cut his eyes at the lad. But the girl didn’t seem to notice nor care and simply carried on, “Do you reckon Cillian Murphy would let me marry him? He was well fit in that movie, weren’t he? That one with all them dreams and Tom Hardy… Fuck, I’d fuck Tom hardy. Wouldn’t you, G?”

George pressed his lips together to keep himself from outwardly reacting, doubting that she’d be all that susceptible to being laughed at, then said, “Yeah Birdie, be mad not to.”

He’d expected Ross to find amusement in her words too but only found the man to be nodding along solemnly, George tightened his mouth to hold back an ugly snort.

“I know!” Birdie went on, and George was practically holding her up now, even as she hiccuped again. “Oh, but he’s not as fit as you, G. Especially when you start doing that thing with your-”

A hand was all too quick to muffle her admission then, and from the dying light in Ross’s eyes George was beyond thankful that he hadn’t given the prick the opportunity to lord something so incriminating over their heads for the rest of their sorry lives.

“Alright, lovely, time for bed, yeah?”

“Oi, she weren’t done, were you, B? What were you gonna say just then, sweetheart?” Ross tried and barely even reacted to the swift kick George gave his leg whilst Birdie pried his hand away from her mouth.

“I don’t remember. But if I do, I’ll call for you! Yeah?”

Ross nodded in quick succession and George took the chance to start leading his girlfriend away from the rest of the party.

He sighed in utter relief once they reached the last door at the very end of the hallway and shuffled them on through. Their bedroom was halfway through the unpacking stage at the moment, just the bed and a dresser had been put together, so he had to be extremely careful when trying to manoeuvre their way past the many boxes that littered the floor.

“Alright there, love?” George questioned after he’d gone and propped the girl down on the edge of the mattress, already making the effort to start peeling off her socks as well as the dress she’d picked out earlier that evening. She looked stunning in it, even now with her hair in disarray and a small stain marring the collar.

She hummed softly in response.

“Tired?” He asked.

“Tired.”

“Thought so,” George chuckled quietly, pulling back the covers so that she could climb in, “Had fun though, yeah?”

“So much.” She answered him, rubbing her eyes sleepily which only removed the mascara she’d popped on whilst getting ready and darkened the underneaths of them. “You?”

“You were there, weren’t you? So ‘course I did.”

“Sap.” She laughed, reaching out to run a hand through his unruly hair. “Love you.”

He smiled and released an airy breath, “Love you. Too much, I reckon.”

She grinned up at him and shuffled further under the duvet, George decided to grab a makeup wipe and help clear up her face, knowing she’d be all stroppy come morning when her skin was horrible and the pillowcases were stained.

“Stay still, you weirdo.” He scolded with a light chuckle when she started to wiggle about beneath his careful hand, “I’m just tryna get this eye shit off for you.”

“Oh.” She whispered, sleep lining every inch of her voice, eyes still wound shut as she hunched her shoulders up towards her ears. “Sorry.”

“No need to be sorry, love.”

“But you’re so lovely to me, G. Always.” She sighed, smiling softly.

“What you deserve, ain’t it?” He replied in the same hushed tone, and there was that word again.

“Hm. I’m glad I have you. And our home too.”

George could only smile as he popped the stained wipe into the little bin nearby.

“Me too, Birdie.” He admitted, sliding in beside the girl to wrap her up in his arms. He could hardly care less about the party still going on outside. He’d locked the door on their way in and Hann had yet to leave, so he was sure that things would soon sort themselves out. Besides, Ross knew where they’d wandered off to if anyone asked so there was nothing more to worry about.

Nothing at all.

—

He could hardly take it.

It was quiet. Eerily so. But his head was too fucking loud. Way too fucking loud.

He’d been spiralling as of late. He knew it. Could read the signs as easily as he could the morning paper, but it’d been a long while since the last. Before he’d left home even.

But he was. Spiralling.

He was free-falling. Had lost his footing somewhere on the curb outside and had yet to land, yet to catch his breath.

But everything was good.

Apart from the not eating. The not sleeping.

Everything had been good.

He was good. Things were good. Things were fine.

Fine. Fine. Fine.

Why was he spiralling again?

He wanted to scream. Throw his fist through a wall and leave it at that. Could feel the agitation he constantly felt cloud him like a cloak.

His foot started tapping away then, and his fingers soon followed. He itched for a drink, something to ease it all, so he stood from where he’d been holed up by his desk all day and stormed through the flat into the living room.

There was a bar cart of sorts set up there, between the sofa and the tele. A wheeled antique cabinet Birdie had seen on one of their evening escapades and reckoned it would serve well when hosting the alcoholics they called friends.

George paused by it for a split second before he flipped the doors open, rattling the bottles inside as another round of thoughts plagued his mind. Friends. Did he have any that weren’t hers?

He grunted and dragged one of the newer JD bottles out, the glass clinking against every other in his fidgety haste. He kicked it closed behind him and wandered his way out onto the small balcony, one of the many things that had sold them on the place all those years ago, and unscrewed the lid.

It was late evening now. Seven, eight-ish or so, at least that’s what he reckoned. The streetlights were lit on the narrow street below and it was just beginning to spit, he raised the bottle up towards the Heavens, toasting the weather’s sardonic humour, before he necked a few gulps.

He hated it. Hated everything as of late. The way he looked. How things sounded. When people would smile at him. Joke. Talk.

He felt trapped. Knotted up with baggage, his head the stone weighing him down. He felt scared. Terrified, even. And he couldn’t for the life of him make sense of any of it.

He sounded like a fucking prick. He knew that. But he didn’t much care, because what was the point in caring anyway? When they’d yet to even start on the next album they’d promised. Yet to even write another song. It was too much. All he ever felt was pressure. Coming at him from all sides. When he was in the studio. When he was at home.

No one could leave him the fuck alone.

“George?”

A voice called out distantly, he was quick to down another shot of the murky liquid and squeeze his eyes tightly shut to simply give himself a second of reprieve, before he stepped back through the balcony doors and into the warmth of the flat.

He grunted in reply after he’d tucked the bottle up onto a high shelf and switched on the tele, if only to make it seem like he hadn’t been stewing in his own head since he last seen her that morning.

“There you are, picked up takeaway on my way home. Figured you might not have eaten yet.” Birdie greeted as she waltzed through the living room, pecking his cheek before heading on over to the kitchen. He watched through the transom window as she placed a white carrier bag onto the counter then make a grab for the plates in one of the higher cabinets, coat already having been shucked off in the hallway and slippers on her feet. “You get much done today then?” She asked him, “Spoke with Matty on my lunch break, he’ll be in London again next week.”

George could only hum, eyes focused intently on the tele screen but not taking any of it in.

“You even watching that? Sound ain’t even turned on, you dafty.” She laughed from the other side of the wall. He heard her riffle through the drawers for something or other, but didn’t reply. “G, babe. You alright?”

“Fine.”

Fine. Fine. Fine.

He had to force himself to breath.

“Fine? Don’t sound it, love. What’s up?” She questioned further, having stopped what she was doing to wander back in.

He gritted his teeth. She only ever prodded. Poking and poking. More and more. Incessant. Never knew when to give the fuck up.

“I’m fine. Just said that, didn’t I?”

She paused, surprised by the bite behind his words. He swallowed heavily, the bitter twang of whiskey still stained his tongue, his teeth.

“Don’t have to be like that, G. Was just asking.” Was what she replied with after a long and silent minute had passed.

George could only scoff, throwing the tv remote he still clung to somewhere onto he sofa behind him. “Yeah, well don’t. I’ve said I’m fine. So leave it, will you?”

She made this face, the same one she always did when she was hurt, but not anything teary or sad, just angered. “This what I’ve got to look forward to each time I come home, then? You and these foul fucking moods you work yourself into. What, all ‘cause tours stopped and the album’s not coming along the way you hoped? Well, boo-fucking-hoo, George. That’s life. Not everything’s perfect. And you don’t get to sit there and take it all out on me, day in and day-fucking-out.”

“Just fuck off, Birdie. I don’t need your shit on top of everything else.” George snipped back and wasn’t fully prepared for the way she shot towards him, snatching up the tele remote to switch the whole thing off just so he’d look at her.

“Don’t call me that when you’re being the prick. I haven’t done a thing wrong, only asked after you.”

George rolled his eyes, already tired of it all. “Leave it out.”

He then huffed and went to grab the set of silver keys that had been left on the console.

She threw her hands up in the air, shoulders hunching. “What the fuck, G? Where’re you going now? You can’t just leave like this.”

“The fuck I can’t.” He snorted unkindly, shaking his head as he shoved the keys into his pocket and made his way back through the house to get to his studio.

“George.” He heard her call after him, but not too far behind. “At least tell me where you’re going so I know you’ll be safe. You’ve been drinking again so you can’t fucking drive. Call a cab or something, head to Hann’s.”

His fists were at his temple then, drilling themselves a hole there, if only to subside some of the torment he felt his mind swimming in. She was at the door a second later, looking lost and hurt, sad now, not angry.

“G, please.”

He didn’t know why but he just laughed a little to himself after having heard her plea, hands falling aimlessly to his sides as he shook his head once more. “I can’t fucking do this anymore.” He heard himself say.

She sighed, this heavy thing that weighed her down before it expanded out into the rest of the room, almost as if it wanted to suffocate not just her but him too. “Can’t do what?”

“This!” He said harshly, hardly even sparing her a glance as he begun to pack away his laptop, his mixing shit, and whatever else cluttered the desk. “I can’t do this anymore.”

“What’s that meant to mean?”

“I just can’t keep fucking pretending! Can’t-” He faltered and faffed his hand about in midair before throwing it downwards to shove a charger into a case, “Can’t carry on like I’m fine. Like everything’s fucking fine, all the fucking time. Like it’ll all work out. Like this is where I’m meant to be.”

A long stretch dragged out between them and all that could be heard was the traffic of the inner city from just outside their flat. He used to love it, but despised it in that second.

“I don’t… I don’t know what you want me to do, George. What you need to make things better.”

He was shaking now, trembling even. Noticed it as his hand faltered when going to pick up the hard-drive sat behind a frame she’d gifted him for his twentieth birthday, one that had sat proudly on his desk ever since he’d unwrapped it.

“I’m gonna go to LA for a bit.” He heard himself murmur whilst he dragged his gaze away from the smiling duo behind the glass. “Stay with Matty, work on the album, explore some of the options out there.”

“For how long?”

Her voice had never seemed so small.

“I don’t know.” He returned and forced himself to continue packing up, tucking his phone into his back pocket and breathing as much as his hollow lungs would allow. “Just, I don’t know, alright. Don’t wait for me, yeah? I’ll figure it out.”

A surprised albeit wet scoff bypassed her mouth then, “What’s that meant to mean? Are you ending things? Is that what this is?”

He squeezed his eyes shut again, if only to appease the swirling storm going on inside his head. His chest ached with the very motion and he fought not to spare her another look as he turned around to head down the hallway.

“George! You can’t just say shit like that and leave.” She shouted, though there were tears in her voice. “If you’re ending things with me, at least have the balls to tell me straight.”

“I don’t fucking know what I’m doing! Alright?” He shouted back at her, the pounding in his head, the whispers, growing in tenfold as he spun around on his heel to stare back the only girl he’d ever loved. “I feel trapped! And I fucking hate it! I don’t want to leave but what else is there? Stay here and drive myself fucking insane?”

She appeared to fold in on herself then, just looked back at him with eyes of dying wildfire and he had to live with the knowledge that he’d been the one to snuff them out.

“We were happy. And I love you. Isn’t that enough?”

The anger was long gone now, replaced only by a hot and heavy pit of grief. “But what if I’m not in love with you anymore?”

George watched her break into pieces, right there on the hallway floor before his very eyes. And he couldn’t even reach out to hold her together, to take back the cruel words.

“I love you.” He croaked, “But-”

“You’re just not sure if you’re in love with me.” She finished for him, wet tears hanging from her chin and drowning out what little flames she’d had left behind her eyes.

“I’m sorry.”

It was all he could think to say.

“Sorry.” She mimicked, “Why? Why now?”

He swallowed, but there was a rock stuck there at the very top of his windpipe. He couldn’t get the right words out. Felt as though all his organs were failing.

She shook beneath his hands and it was that reaction that had him realising that he’d crossed the floor to meet her. He was crying too he found, because when he stared into her eyes she was all blurred and disfigured.

She clung to the front of his t-shirt in that next second and he wound his hands around her wrists, not pulling them away, just holding.

“Please.”

And everything inside him shattered with that one word.

Splintered his entire being, in truth, and sent whatever was left of him ricocheting outwards. She’d gotten caught in the crossfire it seemed and he could only lean in a little closer to press his lips to her forehead whilst she sobbed all she had left to give into his shoulder.

—

Her head was rested against his arm and George did his very best not to move a single inch, even with the turbulence of the plane shaking them this way and that, in hopes not to wake her.

The doctor had given her the okay to fly and although the lot of them had been all too happy spending a couple of weeks hiding away in sunny Spain, working on the album and recovering, it was nice to finally be headed home.

The only thing that had him on edge though, was the life waiting there for them. What would happen once the plane finally landed and they were back on familiar ground? He questioned how long it would take for her to realise the massive mistake she’d made. If she would end things the same way he had.

Probably not, she was a lot of things but cruel had never been a word he’d use to describe her.

He glanced downwards then, towards her. She’d taken the window seat, of course, but thankfully he’d been left with an empty seat on the other side of him. The rest of the boys were stuck a little further up, Ross and Matty conked the fuck out, whilst Hann rewatched one of the many Lord of the Ring films.

She looked peaceful whenever she slept and it always seemed to settle some anxious stirring deep within him when he saw her like that. Reckoned it was only because he could be certain that she was fine, that nothing could harm her with him sat this close. Or at least that’s what he used to think. Couldn’t really claim that now though after he’d been the one to tear her to pieces.

George gripped the hand he held a little tighter with that thought, but not enough to wake her.

‘Ladies and gentlemen, we have begun our descent into London. The local time is 3:36. Please turn off all electronic devices and stow them away until we have arrived at the gate. For your safety and the safety of those around you, please remain seated with your seat belt fastened and keep the aisles clear until we are parked at the gate. Thank you for flying with us, we hope you have enjoyed your flight.’

He drew in a nervous breath at the overhead announcement, but gathered himself enough to then shift in his seat slightly. He knew that if he didn’t wake her now he’d only drag it out, hold out hope that they’d soon fly through a strange portal and into a whole other world instead of landing in Heathrow like planned.

“Hey, B.” George called softly, jostling the girl sat beside him ever so gently. She sniffed and then took a deep breath in before stretching herself outwards, “B, love. Wake up, we’re landing soon.”

“Hm?” She questioned sleepily, and George could only chuckle as she forced her head further into the darkness his shoulder had to offer.

“About to land, babe.” He repeated again, stroking the back of her head as she continued to rouse herself, “Reckon those pills worked a treat, you passed out twenty minutes in.”

“Praise modern medicine.” Is the reply Birdie gave him and he snorted in return, burying the sound in the top of her head.

“Feeling alright?”

She hummed into the muscle of his chest before pulling away to blink sleepily up at him. “Yeah, neck doesn’t even ache that much.”

“Reckon that’s ‘cause you used me as a pillow.”

With a wrinkle of her nose, the girl then smiled, “I’ll be sure to return the gesture in the cab back then.”

George’s thoughts seemed to still at that and the anxiety he’d been shoving way deep down rose up like the City of Atlantis thought to if Armageddon ever did occur. It must’ve shown on his face too, because Birdie was frowning the next time he glanced over at her.

“What’s up?” She asked him, voice still full of sleep, eyes still bleary.

He opened his mouth to wave her worries away, but found he couldn’t.

“G?” She prodded with a small but beautiful smile. “Go on, you can tell me.”

“I know.” He murmured, but still felt conflicted as his gaze dragged between her own. “I’m just. I-” He lost himself in his head again, each breath growing harsher.

“Me too.” He heard her admit.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” She chuckled, smiling again but this time she took his hand in hers. George let it ground him. “It’ll be strange, but we’re together, yeah? Everything will work out.”

He was stuck there, frozen in place, thousands of miles up in the sky, and honest to God gone on this girl. How he’d managed to find her in the first place, he didn’t know, but to have lost her and then won her back also? Well, it gave him the answer to a question he’d been asking for years.

What did he deserve?

What did anyone deserve, really?

He didn’t truly know, but happiness felt like a pretty fair answer.

“I love you, you know that?”

She laughed at him, not unkindly, and he felt her squeeze his hand. “I do. And you’ll be pleased to know it’s very much reciprocated.”

George rolled his eyes, a smile tugging at his lips, “Oh, lovely that. Thanks.”

Birdie grinned as she chuckled, pulling him in close to gift him a quick kiss.

“Love you too, you ginormous sap!”

He could only laugh in retort, shaking his head before he dragged her back in for something a little more substantial.

George felt, more than saw, the grin he was sure matched his and found that he didn’t ever want to pull away again.

Epilogue>

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fullerthanskippy · 2 months

Text

For those who prefer to read on tumblr over AO3, here is the newest chapter I posted today! I'll be posting in both places to get maximum eyes on the work. Now do enjoy, because I made myself horny on the LORD'S DAY to write this, as Skippy would have wanted!

(tagging those who showed love on the original post! @itsalinh, @fanfic-keeps-me-sane, @alexgraphyy, @arrpegio, @hawklovesskippy)

Here are some important visuals for you lovely readers: Picture 1950s Hawk and Tim for the 2012 flashbacks, okay? That innocent little dorky Skippy smile melts my fucking heart. And I personally find Hawk to be very daddy in the 50s (before he was actually even a daddy). I'm thinking up titles, and I have a playlist of songs going that will inspire certain chapters of the book, so chapter titles will be coming soon as well with lyrics of songs that inspired each installment. Gird your loins, we're jumping right into some light to medium smut. ***

The loud music thumped in Tim’s ears as he pushed through the crowded bar. It was the first weekend of his graduate program at Georgetown and he, against his better judgment, agreed to meet up with some classmates he met at orientation. He never went out much in undergrad, mostly opting to stay in his dorm room and study or catch up on his shows while his other peers stumbled through the streets of the small college town.

Now that he had one degree under his belt, he felt like it was time to be a damn adult and see what the bar scene was like in his new city. Besides, at least he was now 21 and didn’t get that pins-and-needles feeling across his skin when he handed a bouncer his ID. Even if his fake that he’d acquired through his freshman roommate did look enough like him and he had memorized the address and date of birth of the man on the card, it still made him extremely squirrely and anxious and usually resulted in ducking out of the line and telling his friends he forgot he had work he needed to catch up on.

The bar was dark and filled with bodies, Tim’s brow already beginning to sweat as the music pulsated with his heartbeat. He finally shoved his way up to the bar and shouted for the bartender to bring him the same beer the guy before him had just ordered. He set down enough cash to cover the single beer as well as a tip, and turned his back toward the bar.

Tim leaned back against the counter, elbows propped up behind him on either side. He perused the crowd for anyone he recognized from orientation this past week. His gaze failed to fall upon any familiar faces, but he did catch the eye of another man across the bar. His heart leapt into his throat and he took a sip of the amber colored ale to try to push it down.

The man was older than him by at least ten years. This was not a concern for Tim, as most of his past lovers were well above his own demographic. The man was sipping his cocktail through the skinny black straw bobbing over the top of the drink. His blue eyes were locked on Tim, and Tim could feel his cheeks getting hot.

He subtly tried to look to his right and left to make sure that the man’s eyes were, in fact, trained on him. The man removed his lips from his drink and one corner of his mouth drew upward, indicating that Tim’s attempt at being covert had definitely failed. Tim let out a breathy chuckle to himself and threw the man a wink. Taking this as an invitation, the man began to walk towards him.

Tim pushed his back off the bar and began walking to meet the man on the dance floor. Though he did not go out much to the college bars with his friends over the past four years, he had plenty of experience meeting men in bars around his hometown. He knew the game and he had to admit, he played it well.

The man’s eyes never broke contact as they squeezed through a sea of bodies to get to one another. Once they reached each other in the mass of drunken college students, the man leaned down into Tim's ear, and just loudly enough over the music, said, “Your lips look so pretty wrapped around that beer bottle.”

Tim’s breath caught in his throat at the man’s forwardness. He’d encountered many a pickup line, but none that sent the blood rushing from his head and into his pants quite like that one. The man towered over him by at least 5 inches, to where Tim had to crane his neck up to meet the man’s gaze. Using his thumb and forefinger, Tim adjusted his thick framed glasses and on tiptoe, he placed his mouth right next to the man’s ear. His voice came out deeper than he expected, and thank God, because inside he felt his heart squealing like a little girl.

“So you think I’m pretty?”

With his one free hand, the man grabbed Tim’s waist and pulled him close. Tim was pleased with his choice of words, as he could now feel the man’s hard-on pressed against his leg. It took every ounce of self control Tim had not to rip this man’s clothes off in front of all these people. The man read Tim’s mind, or perhaps recognized the animalistic look in Tim’s eyes, as he grabbed Tim’s hand and began leading him off of the dance floor.

Once they reached the edge of the crowd, the man wasted no time before setting both of their drinks down on an empty table and pushing Tim against the nearest surface, which was the wall next to the men’s bathroom. Tim’s back was against the wall with the man’s massive hand cradling the back of his neck. The man used his other hand to place it under Tim’s stubble and tilt his chin up until their lips were millimeters apart, both men breathing heavily.

“Do you do this often?” Tim asked breathily. “Cruise for younger men at the college bars?”

“Ouch,” the man had a pained expression, though the sultry smirk never left his lips. “How old do you think I am?”

Tim gently nipped at the man’s neck, trailing light kisses upward until he reached the man’s ear. “Old enough to know better than to start something unless you want to finish it.”

The man pressed his hips against Tim’s, closing the space between the two of them and kissing Tim so deeply that he nearly choked on his breath. “How about this,” the man said as he pulled away from Tim’s desperate lips. “I’m gonna go close my tab, and when I get back here, if you’re still here, I’d like for you to come home with me.”

Tim rocked his hips against the man one more time before pulling away, “I’ll go get us a cab.” The man practically growled in Tim’s ear, placed a sloppy kiss just below Tim’s earlobe, and turned his attention back toward the crowded room. Tim watched as the man’s broad, muscular shoulders and back towered over the tiny women he had to push through to get back to the bar. He felt a surge of pride as he watched these college girls ogle at the man he was about to go home with. If only they knew, he thought, that the man’s stature clearly translated to other things of impressive size, if the feeling against Tim’s thigh had been any indication.

Tim finally tore his gaze from the man as he turned and exited the back door of the bar. As he stepped out into the hot August night, his ears still ringing from the loud music, he looked down the street and held up a hand to hail a taxi. A handful of other people were on the curb trying to do the same, a group of raucous frat boys jumping in the first cab that pulled up. Just as well, Tim thought. His suitor had not met him out back yet anyway.

Just then, the back door of the bar opened and his conquest emerged into the dark night. It did not require many strides of his long legs before he was back in front of Tim, grabbing his face and driving their lips together. The man’s lips were hot on Tim’s as he closed the space between their bodies once again. Tim felt something twitch in his pants at the thought of onlookers in this dark alley behind the bar, watching the two men, all hands and lips and teeth.

The man leaned down to kiss and bite at Tim’s neck, just above the collar of his shirt. While the man was sucking and licking at a spot of his skin, Tim took in the surroundings. He was sure the man was going to leave a mark, but he would be lying if he said he wasn’t enjoying a bit of voyeurism. Groups of girls whispering as they passed the men, missing available taxis that passed by because they were too busy in their moment of passion.

Then, Tim saw a man leaning up against the back door of the bar, having a smoke just under the bright security light that lit up the back alley. With two fingers, the stranger removed the cigarette from between his lips as he kept his eyes locked on Tim, his expression unreadable. Tim threw his head back as his own stranger placed his hand on his ass, clawing desperately at the smaller man. The man with the cigarette ashed it on the brick wall of the bar, ran a hand through his hair, and folded his arms. He wasn’t even pretending not to watch. He was enjoying the show that Tim was putting on for him.

Tim created a fantasy in his head of the stranger joining himself and his suitor in the back of the cab, the three of them fervently swapping sloppy kisses on the way to the original man’s home. Though he already had one man locked in for the night, the man who was whispering absolute filth in Tim’s ear about all the things he wanted to do to him, Tim couldn’t help but imagine what it would feel like to have the two men worshiping his body at once. The dimly lit stranger shifted on his feet, appearing to become uncomfortable at the tightness in his own pants.

The fantasy world Tim had created was fractured when his suitor pulled away and finally flagged down a taxi. He opened the car door for Tim like a gentleman and slapped Tim’s ass as he climbed into the back seat. The man told the driver the address of their final location for the night. As the cab began pulling away from the bar, Tim watched as the stranger stomped out his cigarette, turned on his heels, and disappeared into the dark of the night.

#professor hawk #hawk x skippy #hawk and skippy #hawk and tim #hawkins fuller #tim laughlin #tim x hawk #hawk x tim #fellow travelers

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atopvisenyashill · 6 days

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What do you think the age ranges are in HotD? It is very obvious Aemma wasn't eleven when she married or fifteen when she had Rhaenyra. There is no second Great Council and Aemma is visibly pregnant with Rhaenyra so I putting her at 20 and Viserys at 25 making them 35 and 40 in the first episode. I think Daemon is around 3Oish. Alicent is 16/17 to Rhaenyra 14/15.

Alright putting my ages on top and then i’ll kinda ramble a bit haha-

Viserys - like 24ish in flashback, just shy of 40 in the first episode

Aemma - like 19 in flashback, somewhere around 33-34 in the first episode

Daemon - like 25-27 in the first episode

Rhaenyra - lower end of 15

Alicent - lower end of 14

Okay so my read on Aemma and Viserys in that flashback and also their relationship is still that they married really young - i got the impression that they’ve been partners for a very long time, long enough that Aemma feels comfortable putting her foot down with him which still means imo that Aemma got married a bit young (also as kingcunny said a few days ago, i got the feeling that part of why Laena freaks him out but Alicent doesn’t is because all he sees when he looks at Laena is his guilt over killing Aemma, which means they were young when they married too to me). I landed somewhere on her being sixteen and him being like 21-22 ish when they marry, so she’s like 19 in the flashback, and he’s like 25ish, so roughly around the same age as you clocked too. Which then makes him like 40ish when he marries Alicent and like….58ish when he dies?

With Daemon, I kept getting the impression he was like…..still considered a young hot shot but also old enough that his behavior is getting a bit troubling bc it’s not straightening out. And tbh…..Idk if it was just because Matt Smith reads a bit young in general to me but I guess I got the impression that the age difference between him and Viserys was more severe, like young enough that he has more of a “big sister” relationship with Aemma than a “we are both lil rascals” thing they had in book canon (or at least that’s MY read of all of them in book canon, is that up until Rhaenys’ marriage, Gael, Rhaenys, Aemma, Daemon, & Viserys were all kinda running wild in the Keep, and probably Rhaenys was excitedly telling Aemma and Gael that they can visit whenever they want, but don’t miss her too much because she’ll have to move back to the Red Keep after she has a son so she and Aemon can train her son to be king, obviously). Anyways, I clocked him as like 26ish, so quite a bit younger than you. That makes him like almost 30 when he marries Laena, and then like 45-46 when the Dance kicks off. Which, part of why I like him being a bit younger is because he’s around the same age as Viserys is when Viserys started getting really obviously sick (we see his hand fucked up by the time he’s 40, and he’s struggling to get around already by 42-43 when Helaena is about to be born), and I like to think this adds to his general erraticness during the last episode - not just that Viserys is dead, Viserys chose Rhaenyra over him, but now he’s the age Viserys is when he started to decline and he’s got jack shit to show for it, not even Viserys’ love.

For the girls I guess I just…..from the way Alicent dresses, it made me feel she’s only recently ~flowered~ whereas Rhaenyra has been A Maiden for a bit longer. Rhaenyra feels much more aware of her body and beauty, wearing clothes that are cut closer and in a more flattering way (or well, they’re trying haha, some of those cuts were bad) whereas Alicent especially in that introduction scene and her awkwardness at the tourney, made me feel like she’s very new to puberty. Like, Rhaenyra went through her awkward phase, she’s fine, it’s why she thinks so often about how much she doesn’t want to marry, whereas Alicent kinda shot up recently and overnight, and it’s made her more awkward as a result.

#asks #riana one

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riahlynn101 · 6 months

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What are your thoughts over the movie? I have some myself (and a mild mental breakdown over the Thing™), but overall, it was good. I want to talk about it with anyone, lol

Okay, so....

Spoilers below the cut:

Firstly, I loved it. You can tell how much effort they put into this movie, and it really shows. Kudos to everyone involved.

Things I liked:

Piper Rubio did amazing. No comment beyond that. Abby is one of my favorite characters now, and if anything happens to her, I'll cry.

Actually, all the kids did a wonderful job. Especially Grant Feely. He really embodied that creepy, restless spirit vibe.

Mike and Abby's sibling relationship was everything to me!

Vanessa asking Mike if he wants to dance with her (OMG).

The Springbonnie suit looked great!

Mike having a little bit of an attitude (I love him so much)!

The animatronics were cool. I like that they took the time to make them seem friendly, and almost childlike, before switching gears.

Things I didn't like:

I'm not an expert on filmmaking, so excuse me if I'm wrong here. But the pacing was all over the place. The first act of the movie was perfect, and then the second act was....fast. Like fast-fast. Based on what other people are saying, I'm 99.9% sure they cut out a lot of footage.

This one might come back to bite me in the ass later, but some plotlines felt unnecessary. I know this is FNAF and complicated is written somewhere between Freddy and Fazbear, but did we really need some side plot about an evil aunt? They didn't go anywhere with it, and we still don't know what happened to her. Did Golden Freddy K.O her? Kill her? Who knows? Because we certainly don't. We see her legs, and then she's never mentioned again.

I don't know if this is controversial, but I hate that Vanessa's an Afton. Maybe it's because I was so set on Mike being an Afton, but I really, really hate that they changed it. (I'll elaborate on that more down below).

I felt like they could have given us some more background. Some more flashbacks to the 80s. Anything.

I know I'm being overdramatic, but having the plot twist be Vanessa's an Afton kind of killed all my excitement. Which is stupid, I know, but yeah....

I mean, I'm still going to write fanfictions about the movie, and about all the ways that Mike Schmidt is actually Michael Afton.

--Sorry in advance, but I'm going to ramble--

I have a feeling that William knows Mike better than he's letting on. Of course, he did kidnap Garrett, who could have told William everything about Mike. He could have also watched the news and seen Mike with his parents, asking for Garrett to come home.

But that's not the vibe i was getting from William during the office scene. But I'll let you all decide for yourselves:

William Afton is a skilled manipulator and actor, but the expression he makes looking down at his coffee doesn't scream, "holy shit, the brother of my victim is sitting in my office." He has no reason to look concerned. Mike has no idea who he is, and he isn't even looking at William. So, why put on a show?

Also, the change in his attitude is telling. He went from cold and distant to personable in a heartbeat.

Of course, there's always the possibility that I'm totally wrong, and William is scared he's been found out. Which could be true, given that he doesn't hesitate to fuck Mike up the second he's able to.

In the same vein, why would William Afton-a guy known for killing/kidnapping kids around the pizzeria, or at least close to the pizzeria-drive to the middle of nowhere, pick a random kid, and kill him? I know he's crazy, but I don't buy it.

Some people are saying that Garrett is a Charlie parallel, and that Mike is Henry's son. Which could be the case, I mean, we see a mechanic in the training video that bears a striking resemblance to the actor that plays Mike's dad. I don't know if those two things are connected, but it's interesting to point out.

But, like I said, it's weird that William went out of his way to kidnap a kid for no reason. And he likely wasn't in a costume (at least I hope he wasn't, because if he was and no one saw who took Garrett, I think a kidnapped child is the least of their worries.) So, how did he convince Garrett, who was by himself for a grand total of five second, to get in the car? Maybe he offered him candy or toys? I dunno.

I might go into all the evidence/theories so far that Mike's an Afton in another post. And where they're going with Garrett's character. But yeah....

Everyone, please, feel free to share your thoughts on the movie. I would love to hear them :D!!

((Thank you for this question btw <3333))

#answered asks #asks open #fnaf movie #fnaf movie spoilers #fnaf mike schmidt #Vanessa #fnaf william afton #garrett schmidt #abby fnaf

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starlightshadowsworld · 5 months

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Differences between season one of Bungou Stray dogs and the first 16 chapters of the Manga.

Thinks it's neat seeing whats changed and I really like making lists.

Spoilers for the first season of the Anime and first 16 chapters of the Manga.

For context I watched the Anime subbed and read the Manga in English.

In the Anime Atsushi's flashbacks are usually the same one but in the Manga we see different ones of his time at the Orphanage.

In the Anime the Orphanage has stain glass windows.

Akutagawa coughs a lot more in the Manga.

(Also Bones did him dirty.

And Yosano, her hair is so much better in the Manga. Chuuya looks okay but man he do be looking very gremlin like.)

The Azure Messenger stuff isn't in the Manga but is in the Anime. (I think it's taken from the light novel on Dazai's entrance exam.)

When Atsushi bumps into someone while shopping with Yosano who flips out at them and her when she apologises.

In the Anime the guy tries to guess what her job is, she says she's a doctor. And that he has one arm to many, before breaking the one in her grasp.

In the Manga he calls her a bitch, she breaks his hand and says "then shall I xxx your puny xxx by stepping on them like a proper bitch."

Which he brings up on the train later, blushing and asking did she really mean she'd do, whatever that was.

She's disgusted and bashes his head against the wall.

In the Manga while captured, Dazai calls Chuuya paranoid and tells him his hair will fall out of he frets so much.

Implies it already is and Chuuya takes his hat off to show he's not hiding a bald spot.

Also in his "you can fool Akutugawa but not me" bit.

In the Anime Chuuya calls himself Dazai's old partner and in the Manga calls himself Dazai's old friend.

When rescuing Atsushi on the boat, Kunikida in the Anime says no ones getting paid for this rescue.

And in the Manga says the entire agency is working to save you.

In the Manga Dazai puts on glasses and waves to a random Mafia member saying long time no see before going to archives.

In the Anime we than see Fitzgerald commenting on the bounty plan being a failure.

But in the Manga we see that he's talking about it to Agatha Christy.

Who's listed as, the commander of the order of the clock tower. With the ability "And than there were none."

Before seeing Fyodor Dostoyevsky, head of the underground organisation, "Rats in the house of the head"with his ability "Crime and Punishment."

(Which I think is written in Russian.)

After Fukuzawa agrees to take Kyouka in.

Minoura, the police guy who had to arrest his own subordinate in that case Ranpo took over, comes in. Says he had a case.

In the Anime that's where the scene ends.

But in the Manga it carries on, he spots Kyouka and mentions she looks like the orphan girl turned ruthless assassin who has a warrant for her arrest.

He asks about her parents, if she has any legal documents.

Atsushi cuts in saying he found her after receiving a request from the government to look for this child.

... Just as he was doing the cossack dance in a wheat field.

(Which is apparently also known as the Hopak, a Ukrainian folk dance.... Which, is quite the story Atsushi.)

Junichiro internally says that it's a great improvisation while Kunikida internally calls him a moron.

Fukuzuwa than interjects and says she's his grand-daughter and seeing them both eye him, Minoura is just like... They're cut from the cloth and apologises for his rudeness.

In the Anime Junichiro tells them the case for the car being stuck in a building.

In the Manga Kunikida asks for the present from the police and Kenji holds up a folder saying you mean work.

In the Anime Kunikida says it'll be good for Atsushi to shadow other agents and quickly learn the ropes.

In the Manga he tells Atsushi he can't keep being pampered (weird thing to say to a guy who was just kidnapped) and needs to start working with his fellow agents to get used to his job.

But Kunikida does pat Atsushi's shoulder and says he should be alright.

In the Manga we see Higuichi find Akutugawa in the sea.

In the Anime during her conversation with Mori about Akutugawa's condition, Elise is drawing with crayons on the floor. While in the Manga she's sat at Mori's side.

In the Manga while explaining the rules of Anne's game, Lucy says violence is prohibited in the room and they can't destroy anything in there.

In the Manga after Dazai returns and tries to get Atsushi to write his report, Kunikida ponders that Dazai is always messing with Atsushi.

But there's a note saying "and yet he doesn't stop him.”

#bungou stray dogs #bungou stray dogs manga #bsd manga spoilers #atsushi nakajima #kunikida doppo #dazai osamu #kyouka izumi #chuuya nakahara

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moiraineology · 3 days

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Hi ❤️ I was wondering, how did you like New Spring if you've finished reading it?

Personally I think it was a great choice to read it even before getting into the Eye of the World and I enjoyed all the details about Moiraine, Siuan and Lan's backgrounds/relationships. It made reading EotW even a little easier to me. The only complain I have is that it was too short 🥲

BTW do you have any favorite parts that you'd like to see as flashbacks on the show?! I would love to get a scene of Moiraine and Lan meeting for the first time or their first bonding!

Oh no! I am so, so sorry for not replying sooner. I really didn't mean to leave you hanging. I was excited to receive this question, and then neglected to respond for...two weeks? Oh boy. I apologize.

I did truly love New Spring. Ripped through it in a couple of days over my reading break (a highlight!). I actually totally agree with you re: reading order. I'm not particularly stringent about that in any case, but I say, if you most ardently adore enjoy a character, just dive in and read everything ever directly written about them :D

It has now been a while since I read it, but I think that most of all I appreciated these very flawed, smart, and funny characters it brought to life. I've mentioned this before in a post, but I'll say it again as many times as possible: I love (love! LOVE) Mo's social ineptitude. Or at least that she treats most social interactions like a dramatic performance, where she has to put on a certain face based on her training and her upbringing. I find the part of the book where she learns about power structures in the Blue Ajah, and the fact that she picks up on this complicated dance of deference and authority that someone (Eadyth?) must then explain verbally, to be incredibly moving. Who among us hasn't felt the temperature of an intricate web of social relations, not natural but cultural (or maybe a combination of the two, where difference is felt and ostracized accordingly, sometimes in a very insidious and subtle way) and been utterly confused, and wished that someone would just explain what the fuck is going on between people? All of this says a lot about her background: culture, class, and also her particular brand of neurosis. I find it very endearing and more relatable than I care to admit (outside of this space). Yeah, also I think she's autistic. I'm nd as all hell and I think so, so it must be true.

Also, I love that we get mean Mo. Impatient Mo. Stubborn, obstinate, and immature Mo. She really did grow up with Lan. I think that's gorgeous. These two are actually kids when they meet, and then it's just them for 20 years on the road, and they learn to be PEOPLE, and to not communicate, and to fulfil the roles that are required of them/all that their duty really entails/how to navigate the politics of their world. Just the two of them. I would kill for flashbacks to times after they initially bonded, and how they were able to grow so close after a rather sticky beginning. I think the answer lies in the empathy that is inherent in a bond. Lan sees Mo as a stubborn child, but when he finally feels the fear and doubt and uncertainty she struggles with every day... a child doesn't normally feel those things. She struggles with the weight of the responsibility that has suddenly been thrust upon her, a responsibility that, to her great credit, she approaches bravely and willingly. Mo, too, can't stand Lan at first (I personally think she is jealous of his gravitas and his calm: we know she wants to be that way, but can't yet. Not until she grows up a little more), but she will soon meet the man who has been raised from birth to be the king of a nation that no longer exists. And what that does to a person. And exactly why Lan must be the way that he is (and how much she can learn from him). Also, I actually cried laughing and just gleefully clapped and giggled when Mo was pranking Lan and her inner voice was just...so conniving and sneaky and clever. "He would meet the wasps in perfect health." I genuinely think it's the funniest line ever written (perhaps that says more about my dumb sense of humour than RJ's comedic ability, but to his credit, he is really fucking funny sometimes).

And I can't end my little rant without talking about Siuan. I so appreciated the chance to get to know this character, who is introduced so beautifully to us in the show at the height of her power. As someone who is more than a little bossy, strategic, and clever, and who is very accustomed to being in control of a room. I love seeing what that looks like in a young person. She has the confidence, personality, and work ethic, but not yet the experience to be an effective leader. However, she leads Moiraine. And Moiraine likes it and she lets her. Again, relatable. More than I care to admit outside of this space. I also am fascinated by the cultural and class differences between the two women. The qualities they share (curiosity, drive, ambition, and so, so much integrity) are almost outweighed by those differences (Siuan is measured where Mo is impulsive, Siuan is frugal where Mo spends lavishly, Siuan is irreverent and unconstrained by the expectations of her rank, while Mo is and has always been bound by them). It's cool to see how they change one another. And the ways in which they remain unchanged into adulthood. Right up until we meet them together in the show. Also I think it's really fucking cute that Moiraine wanted to sugar momma Siuan so bad that she tried to buy her a horse. Who?? among us?? hasn't lived that fantasy?? No? Just me? (I would love to sugar momma my baby girl, if only I had the means).

Will you tell me what you thought about it, too? I would love to hear all of your thoughts. What would you like to see explored in the show?

Thank you so much for your thoughtful asks. I love answering them, even when I take too long.

#wot book spoilers #moiraine damodred #siuan sanche #lan mandragoran #fishwives #siuanraine #wot on prime #moiraine x siuan #moiraine and lan #new spring spoilers #wot meta #i guess?

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xnightmare-eyesx · 5 months

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Discovered and read "Glowflies in the Darkest City" all of yesterday, and it's the right amount of gradual falling-in-love that I was looking for in a Rayfrog fiction. Thank you. Something I've thought about since the end of Chapter 8: Ramon's not a trained fighter, but he is an entertainer. Something that could help him improve under Bullfrog's tutelage could be approaching combat like stage direction or dance? It may not be a skillset he wants to revisit, but it is something he can use to his advantage if it's how he can effectively learn. Use that or don't, I don't mind. Whatever you have planned, I look forward to reading.

Ooo you got some good ideas going. I've been doing all of the research I can about Rayman lore (I've been playing through Rayman Legends too) and there's a lot the show hasn't used in terms of Rayman's abilities (there's not a whole lot of funky wacky magic stuff going on besides Bullfrog's bubbles)

I might incorporate that in the fic if it flows right (I do have most of the major ideas/chapters kind of planned out already in my head but I'm always open for suggestions also since I am also kind of writing it on the fly tehe)

To step behind the scenes and into the way I think and I write about the characters though, I think Ramon's never really had a chance to realize the abilities he has. My headcanon (and this could be corrected with season 2) is that Ramon was still young when he fled his dimension, given his flashback to his college days was the version of Rayman from around Rayman 1. He hasn't fought much of the livid dead or those crazy boss battles in Rayman origins or legends. He's a novice at best.

And I also like to think he stopped showing off his abilities he did know to blend in better, sort of like learning to speak the common language and slowly losing your native tongue just to get less bullied and since most things in his world are kind of slap-stick silly enemies and objects, Rayman is used to sort of playing around and having fun instead of actual fighting for his life.

He only now knows how strong he really could be because he's an outsider officially now and it's taken this weight off of his back. He can let loose, fight a piece of himself again, even if it's been twisted and burnt by the world.

Ramon's a good person deep down, he's literally built out of Lums to be the hero of the glade dreams, but he doesn't like fighting. He just wants everyone to have fun and to be happy I think :3

#my personal headcanons are very different #it creates more angst and sad things to write #that lead to more fluff and bonding #text #answering asks #captain laserhawk #rayman #captain laserhawk rayman #fanfic #writing

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revserrayyu · 27 days

Text

2.1 Penacony thoughts [part1]

**Mild spoiler warning** until the first moment we switch to Aventurine’s POV in the story and I don’t think much has happened yet, but if you haven’t reached that point yet, then turn away anyway if you wish I’m just gonna ramble a bit here and toss my thoughts into the void for my own reference.

Firstly, the return of the odd yellow text and Aventurine calling us ~fuh-riends~ in that hilarious and exaggerated tone of his.

Makes me wonder whom else has perished during their time in Penacony, and if it’s true, then the Family certainly has experience with covering such things up which raises many other concerns. Also gives me another reason to not fully trust Sunday.

Oh teehee~ We got Aventurine’s number. And some extra credits due to my responses, HA. sugardaddy

As we learned from a beautifully animated dance animation, Black Swan certainly knows how dangerous Acheron can be.

he whole flashback with Duke & Acheron was pretty good. It at least gives us more context rather than us being told he was killed offscreen, but still confirms the dude is dead, though he mentions the kids are alive, somehow. Duke also guessed that Acheron’s an Emanator (though he’s wrong about which path), then there was some important music box that gets brought up later on, and Acheron speaks of her sword that has indeed been sheathed this entire time, even during the 2.0 story.

At the very end of the scene it fades to black and Acheron full says: “May death be the end of your boundless dream, guiding you back to the waking world,” which I remember is the exact thing she said after witnessing Firefly’s death.

Sweetie, you’re a big mystery but it does not surprise me in the slightest to learn that you’re wanted by the IPC after witnessing your power in your many trailers. Hearing her speak about the Stellaron Hunters though made me think back to her character trailer, since I wondered if she even knew who was attacking her in the first place, but perhaps she did, even if the trio was nothing but Sparkle’s tricky illusions.

It was kinda funny seeing her get lost occasionally in the hotel during the previous story update, but now I feel bad knowing that she has horrible memory. Having to rely on your emotions seems quite challenging if you don’t have a good control of them, but she seems to be fairing well enough.

Tell us your suspicions Acheron! I mean, I have my guesses as well, but I’d take your word over anyone else’s.

It was at this moment where I had a real random idea and thought, “huh, could this be Boothill?” I found it strange how they revealed him to us when we haven’t even met the dude in game yet, like he really came in outta nowhere for me. But seeing Sam again and realizing how both of them have robotic bodies.. I dunno. I thought it could’ve been an extra set of armor or something.

Of course it makes no sense, since Sam & Boothill have different voice actors anyways, but still, the way Acheron speaks so familiar to him, as if they were both truly galaxy rangers, gave me second thoughts for just a brief moment. Nothing more. Just a small silly idea.

The return of the worrisome red text, capable of causing anxiety even through such a small word. With her horrible memory, I assume she’s not even sure what she’s supposed to be doing in life, so asking about Elio’s script and if she’s included made me think she’s trying to learn about her purpose and her own goals.

Say it loud, mom! We shall NOT. TRUST. ANYONE! And at this moment I seriously don’t. If they ain’t from the Express then you’re sus. Case closed.

Glad to see Danny boy lending us a helping hand from the train, but red text begone! First learning about how Acheron has terrible memory and now we can’t even remember her well? That can’t be good.

I firmly believed that if you die in the dream, you would just wake up in real life, so thank whatever Aeon you fancy that we’re finally getting the idea to head back into reality to confirm if Firefly and Robin are still alive. Maybe we should check up on those couple npcs that passed away during side quests too.

The way I held my breath.. I don’t even know much about HI3 but I’m aware our grandpa is more or less the same guy, so seeing him interact with some like Acheron, oh dear. The way Acheron still didn’t reveal her true name to him made me more wary too. I get she might not even remember, because poor memory, but hmmm.

I can understand her having some Stellaron Hunter knowledge because she’s wanted just like them, but ma’am why do you know this?? especially since the Family doesn’t even know the truth about Welt’s cane apparently.

Can’t lie, a fight between him and Acheron would be a spectacle. Who do you think would win?

Again, how does she know this? Has she been chatting with Aventurine? because he figured out our stellaron last patch too.

First thought: yay, she’s worried about us. Second thought: why would she be concerned about Black Swan? Shouldn’t it be the other way around after their dance? Third thought: What exactly is Black Swan capable of and how frightened should I be right now? Fourth thought: Acheron, why do you know so much about others??

So this music box.. why exactly does Black Swan have it now? Didn’t Acheron snatch it from Duke Inferno? Was she planning to give it to BS, or did memokeeper steal it off her? I dunno.

Is it me or does it feel like she’s talking to someone else? Another memokeeper? Or just to herself for dramatic effect? Either way, who exactly are we expecting to show up?

I honestly was getting a bit creeped out during this scene, from the weird camera angles the game was giving is to seeing Black Swan not understand what was going on or who was speaking to her. I actually started fearing for her life and I made a stunning realization that if they killed off BS I would actually freak out. Surprisingly, I wasn’t too upset over Firefly (we didn’t spend much time with her), but it feels like we’ve know BS for longer you know? Ever since that trailer about all the Aeons.

I can hear Luocha somewhere in the distance going “the dead return!” I tease, but actually hearing one of those from Ever-Flame Mansion call out to BS was a bit confusing? Duke said his kids were alive, sure, but BS is looking at past memories attached to the music box, right? So I’m still a bit on the fence regarding who out of the kids are actually alive. Maybe some, maybe all. Maybe I’m being played for a fool and thinking about it too much.

How many of y’all got excited to see Ratio interact with Aventurine again? I know you people are out there. Anyways, hearing about how Robin had a stand-in leads me to believe her death was planned, which would upset me greatly because what did that precious lady ever do to anyone??

It’s crazy this man has actually tried several times to end himself inside the dreams, like bro what if you actually succeeded?? At least this shod bring us some relief that Firefly and Robin are okay? Hopefully? I’ll believe when I see them.

I freakin' knew there was something wrong with her voice!! The first couple times we meet her you can tell her voice sounded off, like it was glitching out or something. It’s not very easy to hear, but the difference between the real Robin and Sparkle impersonating Robin towards the end of the last patch sounded different. No wonder Sunday picked up on Sparkle’s trick so easily.

Soooo, that’s pretty much everything I went through after the update hit. Unfortunately it isn’t much but adulting is a drag. Of course I’m looking forward to continuing the story later on. Starting with these men again will be a treat too.

(originally written on 3/27)

#honkai star rail #aventurine #black swan #acheron #sam #welt yang #dr ratio #gameplay #revsposts

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th3p0rtalmaker · 4 months

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Incarnate Deleted/Recycled Scenes - Adira's "I'd Give Anything"

Summary:

In an older version of Incarnate, Hector remained conscious after being torn apart and encased by the black rocks, then escaped the castle and ran away out of shame and terror. While waiting for his return, Adira sings and mends Hector's torn cloak - the only thing recovered after his transformation. Having this time to herself to reflect on everything and process her experience, Adira also starts to have a meltdown upon processing the sheer horror of Hector's transformation.

Hector needed space when something overwhelmed him. To Adira, it was obvious that he'd run away to find sanctuary (probably with his absent animals) and calm himself down. Eventually, if he was gone for too many days, she'd hunt him down personally - she'd been directly responsible for driving him away, after all. But for now, all Adira could do was prepare for when he returned on his own.

Which, in Adira's mind, meant patching up the large tear in his cloak. It had been caught on a disturbed black rock as he fell and ripped severely. Hector would want it back, Adira knew, and he'd appreciate it being mended from the fall.

And maybe she felt a little closer to her brother, having this garment which meant so much to him in her own hands. As she began threading the needle, Adira found herself falling back on a lifelong instinct and coping mechanism.

"I know we've grown apart, It breaks my heart in two." Her voice was barely audible, cracking slightly through the slowed tempo. She hadn't sung to herself in a while. Letting her emotions spill out of her body was uncomfortable after keeping them suppressed so tightly for fear of falling apart. Now more than ever, Adira couldn't afford to fall apart. Releasing some of the pressure by singing would surely keep her from disintegrating completely.

"I miss your company… The closeness we once knew…"

It had been more than twenty-five years since the real Hector had let himself be seen. He was wild, and brave, and his love and loyalty were heavier than any crown in the seven kingdoms. But he had started to fold in on himself after they were chosen to bear the responsibilities of the elite order of the Brotherhood. Gone was the spunky, playful brother she'd trained with. Gone was the spitfire young man who had grown into a formidable warrior alongside herself. Gone was her partner in song and dance and waging war.

In his place was a bitter, needlessly violent, vengeful shell of a man. This terrifying stranger had taken over Hector's body faster than Adira could comprehend, leaving her lonely and confused. She'd watched an unnamed pain steal the brightness of his eyes. She'd seen him start to cave under some invisible weight that forced itself on his shoulders. But she was ignorant of what caused his suffering, and Hector refused to tell her. So Adira had watched helplessly as her beloved brother vanished before her eyes, unable to pull him back to the safety of her side.

She'd done everything she could to convince him to divulge his problems, pushing him to open up to her like he used to. She desperately worked to prove that she was still worthy to be his confidant. But the harder she tried, and the more she pushed, the farther he pulled away from her. "I won't pretend to know just what you're going through-" Her voice gained momentary strength, before she was hit with a horrendous moment of flashback. She clenched her eyes shut and squeezed the fabric of Hector's cloak in her hands, fighting back the screams in her ears and the sight of her transforming brother in her mind's eye.

After successfully pushing the memory to the back of her mind, where it could safely simmer away for later, Adira began to sing again. Her lips trembled and her voice wavered, but it distracted her from the horrors of the day. And the words held a truth so deep and piercing it hurt. "So if you find that you're in darkness or despair…"

Adira carefully arranged the cloak on her lap so the tear was accessible and easy to work on.

"Though you won't turn to me… Please know I'll be right there."

Hector had a habit of disappearing when he was distressed. Adira knew every single nook and cranny he liked to hide in during their training years, and she always gave him some time to be alone before making any attempts to comfort him.

She liked to think that was one of the reasons he trusted her more than anyone else. Or at least he used to.

"Name any sacrifice, I'll pay the price that's due." Adira smoothed the fabric of the cloak with a regretful hand. She knew she'd gone too far. Even if she fully believed in the power of the Sundrop to stop the Moonstone's reign of destruction, she wasn't right to barge through Hector's childhood home unannounced simply because the princess had caught up to her. There were other options, and perhaps recruiting Hector into her treasonous plan was a bad idea from the start.

Adira hadn't intended for the Great Tree to be destroyed, hadn't even considered it a possibility. Hector and Rapunzel had made their own choices when the situation became serious. But she couldn't help but wonder if those choices would have never been presented if she had simply led the Coronans on an alternate path through the mountains.

Maybe the opal wouldn't have shattered.

Maybe Hector wouldn't have been present when it broke.

"'Cause I'd give anything for you… Yes, I'd give anything to re-live everything-" She cut herself off with a sudden sob as the emotional burden slammed back into her. Adira dropped the needle and clapped a hand over her open mouth as the sounds and sights of Hector's transformation accosted her like vengeful phantoms. It was impossible to hold down her own sobs, tears, and cries any longer.

She re-heard the squelching and ripping as the rocks erupted from his helpless body, the sizzling of the acid as it burned away his ragged clothes and lit into his skin. The image of the black rocks emerging from a living body and greedily encasing it would be incomprehensible if she hadn't already seen it with her own eyes. Adira had witnessed the devastation caused by the black rocks for as long as she could remember. The lives of everyone around her had been affected or outright ruined by them in some way. Some of those lives had been ended by the rocks. Adira had long become accustomed to the sickening physical gore and mind-numbing amount of death which resulted from war. Her kingdom had been entrenched in war with the outside world since before she was born, fighting to keep the Moonstone's deadly powers out of hands that would abuse them. Now the only time her stomach churned and her throat ran dry was if she knew her cohort brothers were in danger of being maimed and/or killed. And for a brief period, she'd been convinced that the black rocks, and the power from which they originated, were indeed going to kill her brother. She was afraid they would turn his body inside out and leave only a bloodied pulp of flesh and bone fragments where a beloved warrior had once struggled. For a moment, she'd accepted the reality that Hector would be the latest in a long line of reminders not to meddle with the Moonstone.

Now she wasn't sure which reality was more terrifying - the one she had envisioned, or the one she was living in. Desperate for protection from this barrage of memories, Adira slung Hector's cloak around her shoulders and held it as taut as possible. She pressed the furry mantle into her face, inhaling the scents of tropical flora and buttered popcorn that she'd come to associate with her brother. The tears only poured faster from her eyes, stripping away the red paint she wore so proudly and dripping into a puddle on the ground. Her throat ached as she struggled to contain the intense sobs and mournful cries that forced their way past her lips.

She was falling apart, and she knew it. And she wouldn't suffer anyone to know about it. She was traumatized, and ashamed, and wished for only one thing in the entire world. She wished so desperately for her brother Hector to be by her side, whole, as she remembered him from the days when their bond was strongest. 🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗🌗 I'm planning to revamp this scene and put into a later chapter of Incarnate because I genuinely love what I wrote here. Adira's emotional turmoil is so satisfyingly sad and haunting, and I genuinely believe that this song is a better description of her relationship with Hector than Rapunzel's relationship with Cassandra. (At least in the context of my fanfic...probably in canon too. 🤣)

#deleted scenes #recycled scenes #incarnate fic #Incarnate #tts fanfic #fanfic writing #creative writing #music #song lyrics #tangled the series #tts adira #adira tts #tts hector #tangled adira #trauma

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link4eva · 1 year

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Kiro’s My Heart Jumps for Joy Mind’s Quest Translation [CN]

Hello, thank you for patience! The translation of this masterpiece of a date has arrived!! 😍

💛 A few things to note before you begin reading 💛

If you haven’t seen it yet, you can find the Exclusive Radio for this date here!

This translation was done with the help of Google Translate and @keliosyfan!

I’m going to be including links to videos about certain moves and exercises that are described/mentioned in the date if you would like a little more detail. I’ve been classically trained in ballet ever since I was 5, so I’m going to leave little tidbits here and there throughout. My bun head self was so giddy while reading through 🤩

I am going to give a slight TRIGGER WARNING in regards to the theme of weight loss in this date. The content of the date doesn’t really revolve around this topic, but it was mentioned enough times for me to feel that I should say something about it. Having been in the dance scene, I know it can be a sensitive topic.

So without further ado, enjoy!

*Spoilers for future content below!*

[First Part]

??: Dear passengers, welcome to Loveland Airlines flight LY0521 from Loveland City to Bern…

Accompanied by the gentle broadcast sound, I quickly finished the work email. After closing the file, I click to open the top chat box–

“Hey, I’ll take off right away~”

The moment the message is sent, a typing indicator pops up with a round-headed bear bouncing around.

Kiro: “Great! See you in seventeen hours and seven minutes!”

After the message arrived, another bear popped up and blew a pink heart kiss to me.

After we “blew kisses” back and forth several times with joy, I turned on airplane mode and looked at the blue sky outside the porthole. *CUUUUUTE*

In order to star in a literary film with a professional ballet dancer as the main character, Kiro decided to go to France for further studies despite the training he had when he was young.

Because this stay is for a month, we agreed to celebrate New Year’s in France so that he could study without apprehension.

(Flashback to MC’s bedroom)

One week ago, Kiro unexpectedly sent a message adding additional plans–

Kiro: “MC, I’m going to Bern to find the teacher who taught me back then to take ballet lessons. See you in Bern!”

(Back to present)

MC: Phew… finally arrived.

After getting off the plane, I pulled the suitcase and walked quickly to the exit while rubbing my sore shoulders.

After walking through several passages, I finally saw the pick-up area. However–

The area was densely packed with golden heads occupying my field of vision. My ability to “spot the blond at a glance” is completely lost here. *I’m hoping this is what the text meant to say. GT made it sound really strange lol*

MC: Hmm…let’s use the power of technology.

Just as I was about to take out my phone, a brown colour appeared in the corner of my eye at a distance, shaking left and right midair in the crowd.

I looked closely and found that it was a little bear hand puppet!

It is wearing a beret and a plaid suit. It is obviously a gentleman’s outfit, but it is waving its bear paws excitedly, and its round head is also swinging back and forth in a rock-and-roll style.

After I waved to the Little Bear with a knowing smile, I quickened my pace.

At the same time, Little Bear also quickened his pace. *Changed some wording*

As I crossed the boundary line of the exit, I finally saw the person I had missed day and night for the past half month.

MC: Kiro!

I let go of my luggage and threw myself into his arms. He tightened his arms, and a laughing voice rang in my ears.

Kiro: It seems that Kiro is also very lucky today.

Kiro: It was supposed to take seventeen hours and seven minutes to see you, but only sixteen hours and fifty-three minutes have passed. *The fact that he counts down the minutes until he sees his beloved again 😭*

MC: Pfft, are you so easily satisfied? It’s just ten minutes early…

Kiro: But for those of us who haven’t seen Miss Chips for half a month, we should cherish every moment we can earlier.

MC: Us?

He raised the Little Bear with a smile, and it leaned down to me in a gentlemanly manner and kissed my cheek.

Kiro: Bear Ro-Ro misses you so much that he told me to kiss you when we meet~

Kiro: But I made an agreement with him a few weeks in advance. He can only kiss cheeks, and I–

In the next second, a softer touch lands on my upper lip and leaves a touch of sweetness.

Looking at the cunning he had in his eyes, I stand on my tiptoes and rubbed my nose with his.

MC: This big star Kiro really has a bunch of tricks up his sleeve. *Changed some wording. GT was giving something about 108 minds and I couldn’t tell you what it meant. I searched forever and couldn’t find anything 🥲*

MC: Even “stealing relatives” needs to find a high-sounding reason~ *This, too...*

Kiro: Don’t you like it? It’s not impossible to omit this step next time…

Just as I was about to smile and pinch his palm, my phone sounded with the company’s notification tone.

MC: …Give me one sec.

Kiro: Is it still busy during this time?

MC: It’s okay~ In order to have a happy New Year with Superstar Kiro, I have already dealt with most of the stuff at work.

MC: Now we are waiting for an overseas company’s cooperation intention to reply.

Kiro: So that’s it…and there’s a lot of time for me?

After pressing the send button, I took his arm with a smile.

MC: Well, almost 70% of the time is yours. The rest I can leave to work~

Kiro: Not bad, I’m accounted for more than half of your time.

He rolled his eyes, took my hand and walked towards the parking lot.

But after walking a few steps, I suddenly felt something was wrong and squeezed his palm.

Like realizing something, I took two quick steps forward, then turned around to face him, carefully observing him as I walked backwards.

Perhaps because of the sunlight, his jawline was more defined, and even his eye sockets became somewhat deep.

Although I knew that in order to meet the requirements of the role, he needed to be thinner. But now that I actually get to see him in person, he was much thinner than in the video call a few days ago.

MC: …

I feel a surge of tears beginning to rise, making my eyes feel a little hot.

Kiro has made such an effort for this role. I want to affirm him more than feel sorry for him.

I sniffled hard, pretending to be cold, and gave him a big smile.

MC: Kiro, you did it, congratulations! You have lost a lot of weight! Now it is very in line with what you showed me before the appearance of the protagonist was set. *Changed some wording*

Kiro: Really? Is it that obvious?

MC: Of course! My Kiro now has a thin and lean beauty.

He opened his eyes slightly and smiled triumphantly.

Kiro: With your words, I seem to have the courage to insist on eating salad for a month again.

MC: You want to lose more weight?

Kiro: Well, after showing the teacher the premise of the character I’m playing, he thinks that the upper body needs to be thinner.

I froze for a moment and reacted belatedly.

MC: Are you talking about the ballet teacher you came here to take lessons with?

Kiro nodded.

MC: It seems that this mentor is really serious, otherwise he wouldn’t have made you willing to “toss” back and forth like this.

He seemed to be lost in thought, and after a while, he grinned wryly.

Kiro: It’s better to say...that he’s a devil teacher rather than just a teacher.

[Second Part]

After returning to Kiro’s temporary residence in Bern, it was already dark.

First, he studied the script for two hours according to the plan, and after half an hour of exercise…

We finally lay down on the sofa and chatted while resting, listening to the stories about him practising when he was young.

MC: What?! Even if you practice until late at night the day before, you have to get up at 5:30 in the morning the next day to practise again? *Can confirm this is 100% true. Had some practices until midnight sometimes and then had to go to school bright and early the next day. Rip 🥲*

Hearing this, I couldn’t help raising my head from his arms in surprise.

Kiro: Well, there are benefits to waking up early, too. You can take your time and have a hot breakfast. Otherwise, you can only just bite a piece of bread and run to class.

Kiro: But what impressed me the most was that if we fell below his expectations even just a little bit, he would force us to stand on our heads.

Kiro: Ah— At that time, I was dizzy every day and often saw stars in front of my eyes in the room.

He paused and poked my nose triumphantly.

Kiro: But under such strict training, I was accidentally trained to be a pro “One, two, three wooden man”! *If you’ve heard of “Freeze Dance”, it’s pretty similar to what I believe he’s saying here (except that it’s not a punishment lol). The goal of the game is to only dance when the music is playing. When the music stops, everyone freezes. If you’re caught moving even just a little bit, you’re out. Whoever is the last one remaining wins. For an added challenge, there’ll be certain poses that the players have to freeze in such as a tree or flamingo.*

MC: Pfft… why is this such a game? Is it some kind of trick to avoid the devil teacher?

Kiro: Hmph, that’s right! As long as I am punished to stand on my head, I will try to “idle” while he is not looking at me~

Kiro: If I don’t, my head will be filled with blood and I will pass out, and I don’t want the ambulance to “wee woo, wee woo” me away. *He actually makes the siren sounds LOL*

MC: …

Listening to him joking about his previous experience, I felt a bit of a tug at my heart.

Even though I know this is typical for professional training, I still feel that this is a bit “wicked” for a ten-year-old child.

MC: Damn, I didn’t expect it to be so “devilish”!

Faced with my belated dissatisfaction, Kiro just smiled, his eyes reflecting the colours of flickering stars.

Then his fingertips wove between mine as if absorbing their warmth and began caressing them gently.

Kiro: I didn’t care about those things long ago, but now that I’m hearing Miss Chips’ cry of injustice…

Kiro: I am still very happy.

I couldn’t help hugging him and leaning my head gently against his chest.

MC: …Then the reason why you came to him for mentoring is that this teacher has an irreplaceable strength?

Kiro hugged me tightly, closing the distance between us silently.

Kiro: That’s right. But at the beginning, I didn’t have such an idea, but when I was training in France some time ago…

Kiro: I found that although the teacher in charge is very professional, he just encouraged me to get used to things slowly whenever I made a mistake. *Changed some wording*

Kiro: But…I don’t have much time to get used to it.

Kiro: I have to practice every movement to the extreme as soon as possible so that I can take on more difficult skills.

MC: Have you communicated with him? Ask him to be stricter?

He paused, his eyes flickering with a complex expression.

Kiro: Well, he said that it was because I have missed the best age to practice professional ballet…

Kiro: So even if one were to follow the requirements of professional dancers, it may not be enough.

He let go of me slightly, the deep sea in his eyes filled the night with more profound emotions secretly surging.

Kiro: But even though he said that, I still can’t accept it.

The classical music flowing continuously from the record player in the room became extremely clear in the “pause” at this moment.

Kiro got off the sofa silently and walked towards the centre of the terrace alone–

Looking at his sudden actions, I seemed to know what he was going to do next, but I also didn’t.

I can only watch him quietly.

After he slightly raised the corners of his lips to me, his body swayed gently to the melody.

*Bear with me as I give some terminology. GT isn’t the best at giving exact details for movements, so I had to get creative to make the steps make sense in word format 😅*

Soon, he seemed to enter the state. Kiro took a round step, jumped into the air and twirled lightly. *It looks like here he is doing a piqué turn en dehors and then going into a tour en l’air. You can watch it here (start at 1:30)*

The moonlight spread across the area, dyeing him bright and clean. His slender arms seem to touch the stars, stretching with supple grace.

Several times, he made difficult moves in the air that I couldn’t put a name to, just like an angel who strayed into the mortal world. *(Video) The text doesn’t say which moves but this link will give you an idea of what is being described here*

He danced like this in the moonlight with the specs of dust, flowing in my unmoving eyes.

I don’t know how long it took before Kiro put down his lightly raised arms and turned to look at me.

Kiro: MC, this is the only episode that was approved by that teacher when I was ten years old.

Kiro: Although I didn’t study with him for long, I still remember this part even now.

Kiro: …Every moment, height, and angle I never forgot.

Looking at the man who was still panting slightly, I couldn’t help sitting up from the sofa and staring at him sincerely.

MC: Kiro, although I don’t know much about ballet, I think the part you just performed was awesome.

MC: Just like the professional ballet dancers I see on TV.

Kiro: Really?

Kiro: But this is not enough.

Kiro: Because I want to play the protagonist who is dancing in the presence of thousands of people on stage.

Kiro: For this reason, he has put in a lot of hard work. He has been practising day and night since he was five years old. In the past twenty years, he never slacked off a single day.

Kiro: And there’s this kind of distance between me and that person that I can’t catch up with.

Kiro: I can only keep practising, keep running forward, and walk through every road he has experienced.

Kiro: Only in this way can I empathize with him and interpret this role more realistically.

Kiro said this softly, his eyes slowly falling back on me.

Kiro: Therefore, his skills must not be treated “according to” Kiro’s own conditions.

Kiro: It is to be worthy of the stage of ten thousand people.

Kiro: I have to be worthy of this pride.

Kiro spoke firmly against the night as if nothing could shake him.

At the same time, a gust of evening wind blows, and the raised hem of his clothes outlines his emaciated body.

The already distinct collarbone is getting deeper now, and even his shoulder blades are clearly protruding.

The emotion called “distress” turned into a thin rope at this time and it slowly twisted, making my breathing more rapid.

I silently walked behind Kiro and hugged him proudly but gently.

MC: Kiro, if you work hard, you will definitely make it through.

MC: And I will always be with you.

He turned around with a smile and rubbed my head.

Kiro: Then I will prepare you in advance. *Changed some wording*

Kiro: I may practice without sleep or food, and may even have some small abrasions on my body…

Kiro: You can’t stop me then.

Hearing his coquettish tone, I couldn’t help smiling and leaning into his arms.

MC: Of course, I know that. After all, you are Kiro who pursues perfection.

MC: Besides, I’m by your side now.

MC: If you feel tired and out of breath because you are too involved in doing something…

MC: I will hold you firmly like driftwood in the water so that you can find support as soon as you reach out. Reach out and I’ll be there.

MC: Let me help you find your breath.

MC: So you can rest assured do your best.

[Memory Silhouette]

It was late at night and light snow fell outside the window.

Kiro sat in a corner of the terrace, quietly watching the world being gradually dyed into a pure white.

He originally thought that the chat tonight was just a shallow recollection of childhood trivialities.

But the sleepless heart lying on the bed seemed to prove that his emotions were not as relaxed as he had thought.

Although he has long forgotten how painful it is to stretch his legs to the right degree. *Changed some wording*

He could still vaguely see a picture in his mind with transparent ink stains dripping on the smooth floor.

It’s just that no one can tell whether it’s tears or sweat. *From experience, probably both 🥲*

Kiro exhaled lightly, stood up on his tiptoes and jumped again following the fluttering white snow.

But even so, he still likes it all.

Whether it is music or dance, they can make one’s heart calm.

And even more so when he was a child.

Apart from KEY’s home, he likes to spend time alone in the practice room.

You can temporarily isolate yourself, and then devote your full being to the melody of each stanza. *Changed some wording*

It’s where no one can bother him, it belongs to him alone–

A secret base.

Thinking of this, Kiro couldn’t help raising the corners of his lips.

He hummed softly, and in the ever-changing dance steps, he caught flakes of white snow with his palm.

It wasn’t until a cloud slowly blows away that the obscured stars finally appear.

Kiro looked at the sky and couldn’t help but speak softly.

Kiro: Miss Chips, the stars are out.

After a brief silence, Kiro looked back at the girl who was already asleep and walked quietly to her side.

The girl fell asleep peacefully, the laptop was still on the quilt, and the screen was covered with program budgets.

Kiro: Trying to work with jet lag must be hard, right?

Kiro picked up the laptop while talking, and after pressing the save button, he closed the screen and put it aside.

Just when he was about to get into bed, he seemed to have thought of something, and suddenly stayed in place.

Kiro: …

In the next second, Kiro began to rub his somewhat cold hands to warm them up and then on the clothes and trousers that were penetrated with cold air.

It wasn’t until his body became warm that he lifted the quilt and lay down slowly.

But before he could find the most suitable sleeping position, the girl suddenly rolled over and hugged him.

Kiro: Are you a koala? You found the right place in one go.

Even though he said this, he still gently took the girl into his arms.

Just as he closed his eyes contentedly, he suddenly opened his eyes as if he had forgotten the most important thing.

Kiro smiled, leaned over and kissed the girl’s soft lips. *This is a reference to his first Exclusive Memory in his Mini House where they agreed to share a kiss in the morning when they wake up and before they go to bed 💛*

Kiro: Good night, my Miss Chips.

[Third Part]

The morning sun gleamed leisurely on my eyelids. I opened my eyes and found that the other half of the bed was empty, only covered with residual warmth.

Thinking that Kiro had already woken up, I also took out the laptop beside the bed and started working.

There is a seven-hour time difference between Loveland City and here, so I can only start work in the early hours of the morning and at midnight.

In order to finalize the cooperation intention with the overseas “TN” company earlier, I have been organizing online meetings with Anna and optimized the planning proposal and budget table many times.

It’s just that the other party hasn’t expressed its intention and my heart is beginning to sink.

After another reminder to keep the staff on track, I got off the computer and walked out of the bedroom in my nightgown.

(Cut to courtyard)

The morning sun shines in through the leaves in the courtyard, casting a peaceful moment.

I walked lazily until I noticed the empty yogurt bowl on the island in front of me and a banana peel in the trash can.

This scene reminded me of the thin frame dancing in the moonlight.

I pursed my lips, stepped forward and opened the refrigerator–

At a glance, there are only fruits and vegetables and unsweetened yogurt on the side door panel.

MC: He’s been eating these every day…there’s not even meat.

I continued to rummage and finally found a steak in the small and exquisite freezer with a sticky note on the sealed bag–

Kiro: “I’ll eat you on Thursday!”

Kiro: “What’s Kiro, who’s had meat for only two days, going to do? Can’t stand it T_T *Changed some wording*

Just seeing the words on the sticky note, his tone of grievance and bitterness filled in my mind.

Feeling sad, I picked up a pen and wrote a cute little sentence–

“I promise that when you accomplish the weight loss, we will find an authentic hot pot restaurant in Switzerland, so come on!”

After closing the refrigerator, I sighed and walked toward the living room. My gaze continued to search for Kiro’s figure.

As if responding to me, after turning a corner, I heard soft piano music playing slowly.

I followed the sound and saw a figure standing against the light.

Kiro stepped on the green grass with bare feet and stretched his slender arms toward the blue sky as if he was stroking something.

His fingertips touch the tree trunk, one arm stretched over the other as his leg extended up in the air.

The close-fitting clothes trace out lean lines and the light is like a paintbrush, leaving traces of lustre. *Once again, GT wasn’t very clear, but it sounds like he is doing an adage which is slower-paced to focus on lines and extensions of the body. The video here will give you an idea.*

Under the shadowy backlight, that unreal figure seemed to make me really see the dream-chasing boy in the script.

The sky and the earth are his audience, the grass, trees and sunshine are his feathers, and the sound of rustling leaves in the wind is the uninterrupted applause.

And like a noble prince standing under the sunlight, the immediate everything is calmly captured in his eyes.

I never made a sound, unwilling to destroy the eternal moment in this “picture frame”. It wasn’t until the sound of the piano subsided that he finally stopped and sat on the soft bed next to him. *It’s interesting that “picture frame” is mentioned because this is one of the techniques used in dance. You can use it for any sort of dance but adage is one where it’s super important to remember. Basically, imagine that as you are dancing, there is a photographer who is taking pictures of you throughout. As these pictures are being taken, you want the photographer to capture each and every position you go through to get to the next. While you want each position to be clear in the picture, you also have to remember to have your body flow rather than have it be rigid.*

I don’t know what he is thinking as he waits for his panting breaths to calm down. Only then did he reach out and lace his fingers into his hair gently, lifting it out of the way.

My gaze was following his movements, and when I found that the zipper was reaching his waist, I opened my mouth in a strange way.

MC: Do you need help?

Hearing my voice, Kiro paused slightly. He stood still for a moment and then looked sideways at me.

The moment our eyes met, the deep blue sea begins to secretly surge.

It’s as if it’s going to drag me into the tide.

Kiro: Well, help me undo it.

His voice was slightly hoarse. I walked over and slowly undid the zipper.

With the movement, the tulle of the shirt slid to the sides, revealing the thin neck and slightly protruding spine.

Perhaps the sunlight was a bit dazzling which made me involuntarily put my fingertips on his.

It is a different touch from the past because it is not so smooth. It is also a little cold.

I pursed my lips and continued to pull down the zipper. Looking at the gradually revealing spine, I finally couldn’t help blurting out my silent emotions.

MC: Kiro, I’ve made up my mind, I want to accompany you. Let’s start with a salad.

MC: I know it will be very hard for one person, so let’s work together to resist the temptation of delicious food. Just consider it a challenge!

MC: But you have to promise me that when the shooting is over, you will eat all the meat that is hidden away.

MC: If Savin disagrees, I will help you to intercede.

MC: Otherwise…you might as well take on some characters that need to gain muscle so that you can eat delicious foods freely–

Without waiting for these words to pour out, he suddenly turned around, put his hands on my lower back and kissed me.

The sudden kiss made me feel overwhelmed, but the instigator just kept silent as he breathed with me.

Slowly, his cold body embraced me and we sank onto the soft couch together, as if immersed in a clear spring in winter.

I opened my eyes slightly and found that the eyes of the person close at hand were still shut, his eyelashes trembled slightly with his breathing.

But soon, he seemed to notice my gaze and opened his eyes.

Kiro: …

Now that his eyes were no longer closed, he looked at me quietly, his fingertips wandering around my lower back.

His fingertips were “cascading”, slowly running over my back and continuously rolling upwards until finally sinking deep into my hair.

The fingertips that kept rubbing made me shiver slightly.

Kiro: MC…

MC: Hm?

I murmured indulgently, but not even a moment after my breath was released, he seized me again.

At the same time, the nightgown was easily untied.

His kiss slowly moved downstream, leaving a ticklish feeling everywhere he went.

Although my body trembled slightly, I couldn’t help but want to do something… I raised my chin and caught his eyes which were as muddled as mine.

MC: Kiro…

MC: Hold me closer.

Kiro: Mm.

Even though I said this, I was the first to wrap my arms around him, making sure to leave no extra gaps.

In this way, we roamed each other’s bodies in this clear spring surging with tides, letting the temperature slowly boil.

Until the sun rises and completely covers the spring–

Only fine layers of sweat were left in the silence between each other which seemed to confirm something.

He finally let me go, but his warm fingertips were still caressing my collarbone.

Kiro: You know what? Before you came, I thought this morning was going to be a repeat of the previous few days.

I lay in his arms, a little confused by the sudden conversation, but he just raised the corners of his lips and continued talking.

Kiro: After repeating the exercises over and over again, my brain began to empty, and I imagined myself coming to the seaside. My feet were no longer touching green grass, but rather soft sand.

Kiro: It seems that you can float in the clouds with just a light jump.

Kiro: At that time, I was thinking, what could be better than now?

He stopped slowly, looking down at me.

Kiro: Then you stopped me.

Kiro: At that moment, all the bubbles of my fantasy disappeared little by little until there was no sea or beach.

Kiro: I came back to reality and saw my favourite scene.

At this moment, looking at those blue eyes that only reflected me, my heart began to softly surge.

MC: Is that what’s best for you?

Kiro: Well, there is no other scenery like yours.

I buried myself in his chest with a smile. We tacitly enjoyed the tranquillity at this moment and felt each other’s breath.

Growl…

Until some sudden sound came from my stomach.

Before I could explain myself, Kiro poked my stomach with a smile.

Kiro: It seems like Miss Chips’ stomach has started to eat itself.

MC: I…

He smiled brighter and lowered his head to rub the tip of my nose.

Kiro: But it’s mainly my fault that I didn’t prepare breakfast for you in advance.

After he finished speaking, he got up and walked towards the kitchen. Halfway through, he suddenly thought of something and turned to look at me.

Kiro: By the way, come to class with me after eating. I already let the teacher know in advance~

[Fourth Part]

In the afternoon, I ended up in a sunny classroom and met the rumoured “Devil Teacher”.

He is warming up at the barre. Although his hair is white, his face is thin and his eyes are as sharp as an eagle’s.

From the slender limbs and elegant posture, it is not difficult to see that even in his sixties, he still has the ultimate pursuit of art.

Kiro: Bonjour, professeur.

Kiro looked at me, wrapped an arm around my waist and continued speaking in French so that I couldn’t understand–

It wasn’t until I caught my name that I realized he was introducing me to the teacher.

I hurriedly nodded to the teacher and wondered whether I should also greet him in French, but my tongue was tied when I opened my mouth.

MC: [In English] …Hi, nice to meet you.

Teacher: Bonjour.

The teacher nodded calmly, and with a wave of his forearm, gave way to the position of the barre as if signalling the start of class.

Kiro: I’m ready to start, so you have to keep looking at me.

He leaned over slyly and looked at me, tilted his head and pecked my cheek lightly.

MC: Kiro…the teacher is still there.

Kiro: Don’t worry, he’s a “devil”, but he’s also a romantic French man.

As he spoke, he took out the dance shoes in his bag and changed into them. After taking off his jacket, he revealed the clothes he wore for practising from not long ago.

Watching him walk quickly to the barre to start warming up, I also went to the corner and sat down quickly.

The piano accompaniment sounded quickly and the classroom is gradually filled with dancing and Bu Bu’s main theme.

Teacher: Non, non, non…!! (No, no, no…!!)

Although I don’t understand French, from the teacher’s passionate tone sounding again and again, I also noticed that the atmosphere is tense and strict.

In just ten minutes, Kiro’s clothes were soaked with sweat, his cheeks were flushed, and he gasped for breath.

But he never stopped. He took a step back onto his left leg with his arms held to the side and bent his knees–

After a burst of momentum, he began to rotate round and round.

Sweat drops were scattered onto the ground following the inertia, and the only sound left in the whole classroom was the sound of the rotation… *(Video) From the sounds of it, Kiro’s doing pirouettes or fouette’s, but I’m leaning towards pirouettes.*

The corrections sounded continuously along with “Non”. *Changed some wording*

Suddenly, the picture in front of me gradually overlapped with a thin golden figure following the story I heard last night.

I thought that when he was a child, in the face of such a “vicious spirit”, he would be trembling.

But looking at it now, that doesn’t seem to be the case.

Even if the nay-saying voice is louder, he held his jaw up high and proceeds to jump up in the air, one smooth movement after the other. *(Video) Possibly grand allegro?*

His face stays determined throughout as if nothing could defeat him.

Looking at him like this, the little golden portrait I built in my mind was stroked with “pride”.

Involuntarily, I took out my phone and silently recorded the picturesque scene.

After an unknown amount of time, the light was dyed red-gold by time and afterglow slipped in.

I straightened my body slightly, and the moment the devil teacher stepped out of the classroom, I quickly walked in front of Kiro.

At this time, he was sitting on the floor stretching his muscles. I squatted down, handed over the water bottle and kissed him lightly.

MC: Kiro, thank you for your hard work~

Kiro: It wasn’t hard, I’m just a little tired–

He pouted coquettishly, opened his arms, and lay back on the floor.

MC: The floor is so cold, you’ll catch a cold like this!

Kiro: Then you should come and warm me up.

Kiro smiled and tugged me lightly so that I fell into his lap and open arms.

As if he wanted to rest for a while, he closed his eyes, his fingertips caressed my shoulder restlessly.

Kiro: Miss Chips, how did I do in class?

MC: Do I really need to say? You did very, very well, of course.

Kiro: Hmm…could this be the encouragement of love?

MC: Wrong. To be precise, it is the encouragement and affirmation of love~

MC: If you don’t believe me, take a look at the dance you just did. It was just like a dynamic oil painting~

As I said that, I took out my cell phone and played the video I just recorded for him.

Kiro: Sigh…It seems that the jump is not high enough and the feeling of staying in the air isn’t either.

Kiro: And when controlling the legs, the insteps are not very straight, and it seems that the muscles are subconsciously relaxed.

According to his comments, I carefully observed every frame of the screen for a second and finally poked him with my elbow helplessly.

MC: …Are you sure you’re not nitpicking? *If there’s one thing that most dancers hate, it’s watching themselves dance in a video. It’s like “Omg, not the sickled foot! 😫” “ What is that leg doing?!” LOL*

MC: Or maybe it’s because I’m an outsider, so I can’t see things the same way you do.

Kiro: Maybe both?

Kiro: After all, in the eyes of the professional, you can see at a glance whether the movements are in place.

Kiro: So I still have a long, long way to go before reaching that level.

Kiro: It just so happens that there is no class tomorrow, so why not spend the whole day in the practice room, trying to improve the instep situation…

Even though he said that, his tone was not the slightest bit discouraged. On the contrary, there is still a bit of eagerness to try.

I couldn’t help but prop my head sideways, stretch out my thumb and poke his cheek like a stamp.

MC: Kiro, you are really amazing.

He also imitated me and turned his head sideways and touched the tip of my nose.

Kiro: Huh? Did you just find out that I’m amazing today?

MC: …Seriously?? I’m praising you!

Seeing me pretending to be serious, he smiled and narrowed his eyes like the corners of his mouth. The little bear dipped in honey obediently waits for “praise”.

MC: Because I saw you in class today, I realized that this process seems to be more difficult than I imagined.

MC: It is simply a double tempering of the mind and body…but you seem to be enjoying it, so that’s what makes it amazing.

Kiro: Hearing you say that, I don’t seem to be bad~

I smiled and winked as I handed the microphone to his mouth.

MC: In this case, I want to interview Superstar Kiro. What tips can you pass on to me in this regard?

MC: I also want to have fun on the journey of training~

He rolled his eyes and laid down again with his head on top of his arms.

Kiro: It seems that there is no trick, I just often see things that make me stick to it when I practice. *Such a dancer thing to say haha*

I looked around the classroom, tilting my head in confusion.

MC: But isn’t there just a barre and a mirror here?

Kiro: Not quite, maybe it’s because our perspectives are different?

Kiro: For example, in your eyes, what you see is that I keep dancing and practising.

Kiro: But in my eyes, besides the barre and the mirror, I also see many different things.

MC: What is that?

Kiro: …I’m trying to figure out how to describe it to you.

In the end, his eyes lit up. When he came close to me, his sweet breath stopped at the tip of my nose.

Kiro: Let’s see, how about you practice with me tomorrow?

Kiro: So that you can see what I see.

[Memory Silhouette]

In the evening after Kiro and I got back from class, we began eating a salad.

Kiro: Miss Chips, are you sure you don’t want to add any salad dressing?

Kiro: You know you don’t have to follow so closely.

I nodded with firm eyes, put a vegetable in my mouth and chewed.

MC: No need, I said I want to be with you.

MC: And eating a healthy salad is good for me, too. It’ll help to remove the buildup of the greasy food I ate before~

MC: If I’m really gluttonous, I’ll use the “self-deception method”--

As I said this, I picked up a piece of tofu, closed my eyes and put it in my mouth.

MC: This is meat, this is meat. Just chew this tender and fragrant meat.

Kiro: I’ll try it, too.

Kiro: What I’m eating now is tender beef and eggs.

I couldn’t help but secretly open my eyes halfway and smile after Kiro had followed my example and closed his eyes to eat.

MC: So? Does it work?

He opened his eyes and shrugged his shoulders with a helpless smile.

Kiro: No, it’s just plain white tofu.

Kiro: Ah– I can’t wait until tomorrow to eat that steak.

Hearing this, I suddenly thought of something and opened my mouth while picking up some beans.

MC: By the way, you said that there is no class tomorrow in the afternoon and you can only practice by yourself.

MC: So when is your next class?

He rolled his eyes and bit into a vegetable.

Kiro: Next Monday.

I froze for a moment and couldn’t help being a little surprised.

MC: Is there always such a long time between classes?

Kiro: Well, he has so many students to teach, so the queue is very full.

MC: Ah..that sounds so hard having to teach classes all day long.

Kiro: He doesn’t find it hard. Since he retired from the stage, he has been teaching students who also want to be on the stage. Kiro: In this way, day after day, twenty or thirty years have passed.

MC: Amazing… *I’ve had a couple of professors who were in their seventies. One of them even performed occasionally, too.*

Before I could finish speaking, Kiro took out a tissue, wiped the corner of my mouth lightly, and continued to eat with a fork.

Kiro: Mm, but being able to maintain his fierce character for thirty years is something that is special about him…

MC: You never really talked about his gentle side before. Is it the encouragement method? *Changed some wording*

Kiro thought for a while, smiled and shook his head.

Kiro: He himself said that he can gently praise and encourage just like other teachers.

Kiro: But to do so would smooth out the edges of genius.

Kiro: If ultimate perfection is desired, then indulgent compliments should be an afterthought.

MC: …Hold on.

I bit the fork lightly, pretending to look at Kiro seriously.

MC: Could it be that your perfectionism was nurtured by this teacher?

Kiro: That’s not true, it just happens to be the same idea.

MC: Really…you already had such an awareness when you were ten years old?

MC: At that time, I would only cry and complete all the holiday homework the day before school started…

Kiro put down the fork, smiled and rubbed my head.

Kiro: Of course, at the time I didn’t know what the term perfectionism meant.

Kiro: I just simply wanted to be the best, to be first.

Looking at his smiling eyes, I couldn’t help pinching his nose.

MC: A very ambitious ghost– *I don’t know what this was meant to be*

Kiro: As you said, being a workaholic is not bad~

He pinches my nose in return and then puts the two empty salad bowls in the sink and starts cleaning.

I blinked and ran to help him clean up the table.

MC: After washing, I’ll help you with the lines, alright?

His soapy hand paused slightly, and after a while, he quickly pecked the side of my face.

MC: Pfft…Are you that happy to practice lines with me?

Kiro: Of course, with your sweet self by my side, I’m jumping with joy. *Changed some wording*

Kiro: So how can I be unhappy when I am soaked in a honeypot~

[Fifth Part]

On the second day, wisps of morning light were hidden behind the classroom door. I pushed it lightly and the sun enveloped my whole body at once, making me feel marvellous and causing my eyes to narrow.

MC: Sure enough, a beautiful day starts by being greeted by the sun.

Kiro: That’s right, today’s practice will definitely be “distinction”. *Changed the word at the end because one of the highest levels of marks you can get in a ballet exam is called “distinction” (at least in RAD)*

Thinking about what Kiro said yesterday, I smiled and wrapped my arms around the nape of his neck.

MC: But before starting, let me say this in advance!

MC: If I look stiff and have two left feet, you must not laugh at me. *Changed some wording*

He looked at me who was close at hand, leaned in and pecked the side of my lips.

Kiro: Okay, but before that, go and change your clothes, alright?

MC: …Clothes?

I followed his gaze and looked back to find a brand new dance skirt on the stool in the classroom.

Kiro: You should know that in addition to office supplies and daily necessities in your suitcase, there are only Spring Festival-themed clothes to be worn here.

Kiro: I don’t have any close-fitting sportswear, so I had to ask someone to buy some overnight.

I walked over curiously and picked up the dance skirt. It was like a cicada’s wings, the thin lace looked gorgeous and comfortable.

MC: Why is this different from the practice clothes in my memory, it looks like a performance costume–

Kiro slightly shrugged his shoulders, cunning in his eyes.

Kiro: Maybe that’s because it was bought for the “princess” I talked to on the phone? ….She’s both cute and fascinating.

MC: ……You really didn’t say that, did you?

He smiled and took off his coat and the practice clothes he had changed into were inexplicably matched with the skirt in my hand.

Kiro: Miss Chips is so silly. Actually, I ordered this skirt online myself overnight.

Kiro: It’s just that my eyes are too picky, so I finally chose the one that I think is best.

Kiro: Of course, the prerequisite for choosing is that it has to match my clothes.

After changing clothes and walking into the classroom, Kiro’s gaze fell on me and he laughed.

Kiro: It’s so beautiful. Now it’s time to invite my Princess Chips to warm up with me~

As he spoke, he led me to the barre and I imitated his movements and put my leg on the barre.

In an instant, I felt my muscles being stretched.

Kiro: Does it hurt?

Kiro walked behind me and lightly stroked my lower thigh with his fingertips which made me tremble uncontrollably.

MC: …No, but it’s a bit ticklish.

Kiro: Then just try to bear it? Your body is left vulnerable to injury if it’s not properly warmed up.

Seeing me nodding my head, he also suppressed his smile a little and helped me warm up earnestly.

His cold fingertips moved from my thighs to my waist and then my butterfly bone. After a while, sweat beads began to appear.

His fingertips are no longer cold, almost as if they were absorbing my increasing body temperature.

It wasn’t until the sunlight shifted after a few minutes that I exhaustedly leaned on his shoulder.

MC: Why…is warming up so tiring. I feel that it’s even more energy-consuming than Pilates. *Between the two, Pilates rocked me omg. My body wouldn’t stop shaking after 😖. But ballet warm-ups can be hella intense, too. I had one teacher that used to say that if you’re not pouring sweat after the first exercise, you’re doing something wrong 😅*

Kiro: You can’t stop now, this is just the beginning.

Without waiting for me to make a bitter face, he rubbed my cheek.

Kiro: Or do you not want to feel it?

MC: Of course I do, what should I do next?

At this time, there was a vibrating sound which seemed to be coming from my cell phone on the bench.

I glanced at Kiro, walked over suspiciously and picked it up to find it was Anna calling.

Anna: MC, TN, which had been wanting to talk about cooperation before has finally agreed.

Anna: But the profit they proposed is far worse than our expectation. We don’t even have the authority to plan the programs we cooperate with…It feels like the company has exhausted all its options.

MC: Is there room for negotiation?

Anna: Probably not. After all, TN is an experienced overseas media company, and many domestic media companies want to cooperate with them even after paying money.

My heart sank. Facing this “favourite” in the eyes of the media, I was speechless, so I had to end the call first.

Kiro: What’s the matter? Your expression doesn’t look good.

I don’t know when but Kiro came to my side and rubbed between my brows.

I took a deep breath and briefly explained the incident.

MC: I thought it was good news, but I didn’t expect it to be a sum of money that would almost erase our profits besides increasing popularity.

As I said that, I buried myself in his chest with some distress.

MC: But in the long run, this is a very important step in the strategy of “occupying” overseas markets.

MC: So is it better to agree to cooperate?

Kiro: So you’re conflicted about which option to go with?

MC: After all, it is a matter of choice. No matter which option we go with, I won’t feel very reconciled…

Kiro gently stroked my hair, his eyes filled with light.

Kiro: I don’t think there’s anything to be worried about.

He said this and took me to the barre and put my hands on top of it.

Kiro: MC, in order to achieve our goals, we have to accept that no trade-offs can be made.

Kiro: But it’s not a once-and-for-all decision. Sometimes it’s only an illusion that confuses you.

Kiro: Let you mistakenly think that giving up important things will give you better returns in the future.

MC: Kiro…

Gazing into my perplexed eyes, he just moved closer to me, breathing lightly by my ears.

Kiro: I still remember the teacher telling me in my first ballet class–

Kiro raised my chin with his fingertips, making my breathing stop.

Kiro: Never bow your head so easily.

His eyes are clear and bright in the sun, but also a little fierier.

Kiro: Everyone has their own pride.

Kiro: So we need to continue to maintain it to keep it fulfilled.

No matter how slow I was, I realized that Kiro seemed to care about what he was referring to.

Kiro: And, if you want to let your every move be relaxed and controlled.

Kiro: Then you yourself must first have strength.

In the next second, his fingers moved between my legs. Within seconds, tremors spread all over my body.

Kiro: Squeeze your legs.

Kiro: The strength runs through from the feet to the head, so this way you can stand more firmly and not be easily shaken.

A low but undeniable voice sounded in my ears. I took a light breath and tried to squeeze my legs together according to his words.

I gradually felt his fingertips being squeezed and restrained by my legs, but I still let his fingertips climb up calmly.

Kiro: Your inner strength is not enough, I can still do whatever I want. *Just want to add that this is something that dance teachers stress to their students. Having inner thigh strength is one the most important things to maintaining good balance, along with core strength.*

As if to prove his words, he pulled out his hand and easily picked up my leg with one finger and slowly tightened his palm.

The sudden move made me want to look in the mirror ahead.

He seemed to sense what I was going to do and gently held my jaw. *The position that MC is in is called arabesque*

MC: Kiro…?

Seeing that I was a little surprised, those quiet eyes finally turned into a small smile.

Then he leaned closer and rubbed my shoulder.

Kiro: Miss Chips, remember what I said yesterday?

Kiro: About what exactly I saw in my vision.

MC: Mm…

He smiled lightly and looked into the distance.

Kiro: I’m not actually watching myself in the mirror doing one movement one after another.

Kiro: Nor am I looking at every person and thing in this classroom.

He paused and slowly retracted his palm that was tightly holding my waist.

Kiro: I will look to the end of the distance. *YASSSS!! This is another thing that is taught in dance. You don’t want to just aim your focus at the audience or at an object, you want to project it outside the venue and beyond.*

Kiro: Sometimes there is the sea, the green grass, and the place where I shuttle between cities.

Kiro: They are all my stages.

Kiro: And when I perform on my stage, how can I feel bitter?

Kiro: I just feel satisfied, and I just want to stay on this stage just a little longer.

Looking at the vast sea in his eyes, my heart also ripples like the waves.

It surges endlessly, pushing me to the bright place again and again.

Kiro: Now, do you still feel stuck on which decision to make?

I looked and him and shook my head slightly.

MC: It seems that I no longer am. I know what I should do now.

Seeing that I had an answer, Kiro laughed.

In the next second, he held my waist with both hands like in a classic ballet pas de deux and lifted me into the air.

Kiro: MC, I have one more thing to ask you.

He said this while supporting me to turn and face the window.

Kiro: Can you tell me what the scenery is in your eyes right now?

Following his voice, I looked at everything in my field of vision and my heart began to surge softly.

MC: I…

MC: I see the grass, the sky, and the distance…

MC: I see many beautiful sceneries.

Even though it is an all-too-common scene in front of me, I dare not blink at this moment.

I don’t want to spoil a single bit of it.

Kiro: You said before that if I feel tired, out of breath or frustrated…

Kiro: You’ll be the driftwood that’ll always hold me up.

Kiro: So that I can do whatever I want to the best of my ability.

Kiro: And I’ll be yours.

Kiro lowered me slowly while talking and we were attached to each other without any gaps.

His eyes were shining brightly as if this fine light is enough to light up my whole being.

I couldn’t help but hold his cheeks and smile brightly.

MC: Kiro, you have always been doing something like this for me.

MC: I know you will always be by my side, encouraging and supporting me. So no matter what happens, I won’t be timid.

MC: You have always been my strength. *CRYING RN*

Kiro shook his head lightly with a gorgeous smile on his face.

Kiro: Just this is not enough.

Kiro: I want even more of you.

After speaking, he gently held my head and kissed me tenderly.

His breath is so soft, but it seems to be able to invade my whole world, leaving only the surging sea.

I just lay in the blue ocean, letting it move my body with the tides.

In his arms, I also slowly closed my eyes, feeling his temperature, feeling being surrounded by light–

Because my heart has already crafted the brightest and most beautiful scenery.

[End]

#mlqc #mr love queens choice #mlqc kiro #mr love kiro #mlqc spoilers #周棋洛 #mr love game #THIS IS MY NEW FAVOURITE DATE NOW!!!#date translation #MC BEING SO OPENLY AFFECTIONATE #KIRO BEING VULNERABLE #KUDOS TO YOU PG!!!

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spine-buster · 1 year

Text

To Sail Beyond the Sunset ft. Sidney Crosby | Chapter 3

gif credit @/maljic

A/N: very long flashback scenes in this one...

Okay. June was acting suspicious.

There were so many classes where she had to stay late now. There were so many “extra lessons”. Sid understood that they’d all just had their auditions and they wanted to perfect everything, but it was all still…well, suspicious. June had always been clear from the start with her girls and their parents about how she valued school, sleep, social time, and the girls living normal lives outside of dance, so it was weird to him that, all of the sudden, she was taking on extra lessons that went later than normal. June had those rules and worked that way because she hardly got those things when she was growing up and going through dance.

Sidney kept telling himself that June had never lied to him before; she’d always been honest and upfront about everything. That’s how their relationship was, how it had always been. He had zero reason to think she was lying. That is, until he thought about how principled she was in not having ballet take over someone’s life like it took over hers. So, to Sid, it was very weird of her to suddenly back out of that principle.

June never lied to him. However, she did lie to others. Most notably Miss Hockley. Well, she lied to Miss Hockley once, and Sidney didn’t think it ever happened again.

1999.

When it was apparent that June was miles ahead of the other girls in dance class, and that nobody could be at her level, Miss Hockley searched for a better, more classically trained former ballerina or ballet-company-adjacent teacher to instruct her daughter and make her the best. Choices were few and far in between in Atlantic Canada, let alone Halifax, but Miss Hockley found her person: enter Yulia Nikolaev, a Russian-American former first soloist at the American Ballet Theatre who had married rich before her husband died and she retired to Halifax. She ran very small, very intense, and very exclusive ballet classes in Halifax. After June’s audition with her, to see if Yulia would even take her on, Yulia approached Miss Hockley. “With me,” she said, “your daughter will be the next great prima ballerina.”

Yulia was intense. Yulia demanded the best. Yulia demanded results, and Yulia got results. With Yulia, it was ballet 24/7. It was investing your entire life into ballet – your time, energy, resources, money, everything. “When you invest, you become the best,” she’d constantly say to June. Miss Hockley was practically foaming at the mouth. She loved it; she loved the methods Yulia used and the demands she had of her students. They were on the same page about most things, including training, technique, hours put in, and more. It was all worth it when Miss Hockley could see June rise to the top of Yulia’s small, exclusive class too. Within a year, June was – once again – miles ahead of everybody else. Her turns were exquisite, her balance to die for, her technique was as if she’d been dancing for ten years.

Yulia even made each of her students and parents sign a contract that outlined rules and expectations. A certain number of hours per week. Pointe shoes would be provided. No tardiness for class. No performing or auditioning for other studios. No competitions unless Yulia entered you. No short hair. No extravagant nails.

No ice skating.

But that didn’t stop Sidney and June.

It had to be done in secret, of course. Both were very well aware of the rule in the contract June and her mom signed. Hell, even Troy and Trina were made aware of it thanks to Miss Hockley. “June is not allowed to skate. She can’t go skating with Sid. Do not let her skate.” It was in there because skating could always cause injury, especially to the ankles, and strong ankles were a ballerina’s best friend. June couldn’t remember the last time she skated, because so much of her time was dedicated to dance. She must have been four of five the last time it happened, and it must have been on a school field trip or something. She remembered Sid being able to skate circles around all the other kids because his parents had already started him in hockey, and he’d been out on the ice with his dad, too. When June would be able to go to his games at local arenas, she was always amazed at how fluid he was on the ice and how he made it look so easy. She’d definitely embarrass herself now, but even then, she could never really embarrass herself in front of Sid.

Sidney had hidden the extra pair of skates in his bag. They were his from a few years ago that he’d outgrown, that his parents were keeping in case his new baby sister Taylor ever took up hockey, too. They were walking to the local rink together, their feet moving faster than normal. “Are you excited?” Sidney asked.

June nodded, her scarf and toque covering half her face. “I don’t know how to put them on, though.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll help you with that,” he said confidently. “I think you’ll be great because you have really good balance.”

“I hope so,” June lamented. “I don’t want to be falling on my butt the entire time.”

When they got to the arena, just in time for the opening of the public skating hours, Sid took June near the side where the benches were to put on her skates. She watched as he shoved her foot in them, tightening up the laces and tying them tight. So many people said hi to Sidney – regulars at the arena, no doubt – and he greeted them all politely. June even watched as some of the local boys – boys who played on opposing teams – saw him and looked like they were going to say something, but when they saw her, it shut them up. She glared at all of them, knowing exactly the kinds of things they were saying and doing to Sid on and off the ice. If it were up to her, she’d deck each and every single one of them.

“Okay, you’re ready,” Sidney announced as he finished tying her skates. “Stand up on them and get used to it while I put on mine. It won’t take long.”

June did as she was told, holding her arms out to help balance at first, but she got used to the feeling after a few seconds. Sidney was putting on his skates at rapid speed. “You have to make sure I don’t get hurt,” she said, her nerves getting the best of her. She was excited to do this, but knew of the dangers.

“I promise,” Sidney said, not even looking at her. “You can hold on to me the entire time if you want.”

“I might have to if I’m not as good as you.”

“That’s okay,” he said. “It’s not rocket science, Junebug. All you’ve gotta do is try to glide. That’s it.”

She gulped when he stood in his skates. “Ready?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be.”

A couple more people said hello to Sid as he and June made their way to the rink door. There were already a lot of families out on the ice, but when Sid stepped on the ice, a majority of their heads turned his way. June could see them all. She got nervous. “Come on, Junebug. I promise it won’t be bad. Step sideways onto the ice, like this,” he showed her with his foot.

June knew she had to overcome her fear, so she took a deep breath and stepped out onto the ice. Sidney held out his hands and she grabbed them instinctively. “How does it feel?” he asked.

“Slippery.”

He laughed. “Just go like this,” he said, letting go of her and showing her what she had to do with his feet. “You can hang on to me until you get the hang of it.”

She did what she saw. Bend her knees, lift off with one foot, and then switch to the other. In no time at all, she found herself skating – not like Sid, of course, but at least she was moving on the ice. “Ha!” she let out enthusiastically. “Look at me! I’m skating!”

“Come catch me, June!”

Sid and June skated for the full public skating hours. They skated until most of the other families packed it up and left. June didn’t think she’d ever had this much fun in her entire life. She never went as fast as Sid but she didn’t have to; with them playing games and doing their laps around the ice, June was having the time of her life catching him, crashing into him, and so much more. She didn’t think the smiles on hers or Sidney’s faces ever left, and they were in a constant state of laugher and giggles. A part of her wondered if skating was always this fun, and if it was this fun for others, too. She felt like she missed out on so much never skating, especially in Halifax, especially in Canada, especially in the winter. She was sure her cheeks were a rosy red from her smiling and giggling.

“I’m coming! Watch out!” she screamed as she hurled herself towards Sidney.

Sid caught her in his arms and laughed his brains out at the noise she made when she crashed into him. He couldn’t even keep track of how many times she’d done so. He really needed to teach her how to stop. “Junebug, how about—”

“GET OFF THE ICE NOW!!!!!”

The voice was deep and guttural, unlike anything Sidney or June had heard before. Still holding on to each other, they whipped their heads towards the rink door, only to see Miss Hockley standing in her winter jacket. Her face was red with rage, her eyes wide as she stared daggers at her daughter on the ice. Sidney watched as all the colour drained from June’s face as she realized who it was. “Oh no,” she whispered, her voice full of fear.

“Junebug—”

“—She’s going to kill me.”

“No she won’t.”

“NOW, JUNIPER!!!”

“I got this,” Sidney whispered back to her.

“Sid—”

“—I got this Junebug, don’t worry,” he assured her once more before they let go of each other slightly. Sidney started to skate and he held June’s hand, pulling her with him as he moved. As he got closer, he could really see how livid Miss Hockley was. He took a deep breath. He didn’t even know what he was going to say, but he knew he was going to take the fall for it.

“This is what you call studying for your math test, huh?!” Miss Hockley demanded to June once they were in earshot. “You filthy little liar.”

“Mom—”

“—It’s my fault, Miss Hockley,” Sid intervened, squeezing on June’s hand to try to signal to her to stay quiet. “We were studying, but then I wanted to take a break, and—and—and I was the one who suggested skating and—”

“I don’t want to hear it, Sidney,” Miss Hockley dismissed him, grabbing June by her other arm and tugging her so harshly she tripped up on the platform and almost fell. “June knows she’s not allowed to skate and she did anyway,” she said before looking down at her daughter. “After everything I do for you,” she laid the guilt on quickly. The tears had already started welling up in June’s eyes. “After everything I do for you to be in dance classes, you lie to me and go skating?! Don’t you realize I’m working at the supermarket for you?! For your dance classes?!—”

“—Mommy, I swear—”

“—You’re a little liar and a cheat—”

“—Mom, I’m sorry—”

“—You just wait until we get home,” Miss Hockley’s voice was so hostile and nasty, even Sidney felt threatened. “Now take those God forsaken skates off your feet.”

Miss Hockley practically dragged June through the arena and towards the benches as she cried. Sidney got off the ice and followed them, not wanting June to think she was alone. She cried as she unlaced the skates, cried as she pulled them off her feet, cried as on-lookers watched the scene. She was so embarrassed. She’d been having so much fun, and then it all came crashing down.

“Miss Hockley, I swear that it was my fault,” Sidney tried to continue as June unlaced the second skate. “If you’re going to be angry at anybody, you can be angry at me. I made June skate. I don’t think she should get in trouble for something I made her do.”

“Juniper knows exactly what she can and can’t do. She signed a contract and she knows that she can’t skate. I don’t care how much you made her do it, Sidney – Juniper knows she is not allowed to skate. She made the decision to do it and now there’s going to be consequences.”

“But Miss Hockley—”

“—I’ll be calling your mom and dad about this too, don’t you worry,” she said, picking up the skates and tossing them in his bag without any care. “If you ever help June lie again—”

“—You’re not listening to me!” Sidney exclaimed, surprising even himself with his anger towards Miss Hockley. “It was me! It was all me!”

“Enough, Sidney,” Miss Hockley dismissed him as she tugged June up once she had her boots on and dragged her out of the arena.

Sidney was too shocked to move. He hadn’t even taken off his skates, so there was no way he could follow them out and to the parking lot to their car or if they walked along the sidewalk. All he could do was hope for the best, and ignore all the eyes watching him. ***

Sidney was waiting to be tucked into bed when he heard his mom speaking to someone on the phone. The person on the other end of the receiver was speaking so loudly that Sidney could hear their voice, though he couldn’t make out the words. His mom, pacing around the house, was saying variances of “Mhmm” and “Yes” and “Okay” through whatever the other person was saying.

“Alright…alright….yes, we’ll talk to him about it…well no…no, she was safe. Sidney would have never let her fall.”

Sidney knew automatically then than Miss Hockley was on the other line. The hairs on the back of his neck stood on end as he tried to listen more to what his mom was saying. “No, I won’t be grounding him. Troy and I will be talking to him, don’t worry…She’s been grounded?…One week of no TV? I think that’s more than enough…okay…okay…yes, goodnight.”

Sidney waited with baited breath until he heard his mom knock softly on his door. “Come in,” he said.

His mom opened the door, and upon seeing him already in bed, smiled. She closed the door half way before walking over to his bed and sitting on the edge. “A little birdy told me you went on a field trip today,” Trina said, her voice not nearly as serious as Sidney thought it would be.

He nodded his head. “I took June skating. She’d never been skating before.”

“Never?”

“She’s not allowed to because it’s in her dance contract that she can’t skate,” Sidney said. “But we went during public hours. She was wearing my old skates. We were having so much fun, mom, and she didn’t fall at all! But then somehow Miss Hockley found out, and mom – she screamed at us. I’ve never heard her voice sound like that.”

“She found you out on the ice?”

“Yeah. And so we had to go. June was so nervous. And then when we got to Miss Hockley, she pulled June off the ice and called her a liar and a cheat and—”

“Miss Hockley said that to June?” Trina asked.

Sidney nodded. “I tried to take the blame so June wouldn’t get in trouble but Miss Hockley wouldn’t listen to me. Am…am I in trouble, mom?”

Trina couldn’t help but chuckle slightly, running her hand through her son’s hair. “No Sid, you’re not in trouble,” she assured him. “But you do have to realize that June can’t do some things that you can. It’s just the way things are.”

Sidney sighed. “But it’s unfair for her.”

“I know it is, sweetie,” Trina lamented with him. “But unfortunately, sometimes we live in a not-so-fair world. June has to be really careful because of ballet. I don’t think you would want her to work so hard as she does and then have it all fall away because of a freak accident or something.”

June did work hard. And she was put through so much by her mom and dance teachers that he knew he couldn’t ruin anything for her. Sidney nodded his head. “I get it.”

“Anything else I should know about? Any other places you two went to today?” Trina asked.

“No. Just the rink.”

“Well, alright,” she said, leaning over to give him a quick kiss on the forehead. “Sleep tight, sweetheart.”

Miss Hockley had kept her promise – no TV for June for a week. Instead, she made her train more. And when June went over Sidney’s within that time period, she didn’t watch TV at his house, either. She probably thought her mom was going to burst through the door and check. Sidney even saw the small bruises that were left on June’s forearm from where Miss Hockley had grabbed her and pulled her off the ice before dragging her through the arena. The incident and their relationship were why Sidney thought June would never lie to him. And he was confident in that. Always.

Most of the time.

Usually.

***

June was acting suspicious. But she knew so. And she knew it appeared so to Sidney. When she told him the first time that she had to stay late at work for “extra lessons”, she saw the look on his face. She saw the gears shifting. She saw him struggling with whether to believe her and trust her because he’d never not trusted her before, or whether to get to the bottom of it.

For her part, June knew she didn’t have a lot of time. She knew Sidney would figure it out soon enough.

It’s not like June liked lying to Sid. It just had to be done. She couldn’t tell him anything yet, because she wasn’t sure herself of…well, everything. She knew better than to count her chickens before they hatched. She didn’t do it often, if ever, and when she did, she hated doing it. The only time she lied to him, that she could recollect, was when he asked why she and her fiancé, Cameron Currie, split up.

2015.

“I can’t do this anymore, June,” Cameron finally said, exasperated, tired, unable to fight anymore with his fiancé. They’d been fighting a lot lately – too much – and it all came to a blow tonight, where a small argument blew up into a nuclear war.

“You can’t do what?” June asked.

Cameron stood there, silent. Chest heaving from yelling. Looking at her. Wanting her to realize what he was saying. “This. Us. I can’t do us anymore,” he pointed between them.

With the words being said out loud, any anger that was in June’s body dissipated. “What do you mean?”

“I can’t keep doing this,” he said, trying to keep his words as simple as possible. “I can’t keep pretending you love me as much as you love Sid.”

The words were like daggers to June’s heart. “I—I don’t—”

“We can’t keep kidding ourselves, June. I love you, and you love me. I know that, but—but you’ll never love me the same way you love Sid. You just won’t. We can’t keep going on pretending like you can. I thought I’d get there. I thought it would change. But it hasn’t. And it won’t. And I can’t…I can’t do this anymore.” ***

“You guys what?!” Sidney exclaimed, having a full-body reaction to June’s news. “You and Cameron broke up?!”

June nodded. “Yeah. The wedding’s off.”

Sidney couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Every time he was in Toronto and hung out with June, she always mentioned how good the relationship was and how happy they were together. He’d met Cameron too, of course, and liked him, thinking he was good for June. To hear that they’d split felt like the shock of the century to him. “I don’t—I mean, if you don’t mind me asking Junebug, what happened?”

June sighed and bit her bottom lip. She knew he was going to ask, but there was no way she was going to tell him the truth. No way. “We just…” she began, trying to find the words. “We just grew apart, like people do. There were, um, some things that changed and we just couldn’t work through. And it wasn’t like we didn’t try. We tried for a while and there was just never a resolution.”

June watched for Sidney’s reaction, and judging by his face, he believed her. “I’m so sorry, Junebug.”

“Thanks, Sid,” she said. “We still have love for each other. It’s what we both said. But we both realized, we both came to the conclusion together that we…well, we can’t get married.”

Sidney would come to know the truth soon enough. Either she’d tell him the truth, or he’d find out himself through an investigation on his part. Either way, June knew she’d have to apologize for her lying, apologize for keeping it a secret, apologize for not being honest with him sooner.

And Sidney, with his heart of gold, would forgive her.

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