#good omens summary

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

Pt III good omens but i STILL SOMEHOW haven't watched it (and i'm increasingly passive aggressive)

i'm now basically held hostage adopted as mascot by this fandom. it's fine i'm fine *SIGNALS FOR HELP DESPERATELY*

Alright fuckers I swear this time I'm going to get some shit right. Without further ado, here's my third attempt at a good omens summary:

Everything everywhere is queer all at once

Angel Aziraphale and demon Crowley on earth likey each other

The car is a bentley and it is BLACK not silver and everyone is very upset about this. my bad yall it was reflecting light therefore i guessed more silver than black but I'm not Anish Kapoor take your black.

Then it is yellow, and aziraphale likes it. crowley preferred the black because he's a flamboyant emo.

God is a deadbeat absentee parent and you are all children of divorce.

There's a naked archangel and they cause problems for the husbands somehow. By being naked? By being an archangel? By being at their doorstep? Who knows not me

They were actually married for 6000 years, they just are the last to know about it.

Crowley is on fire. Like, he's slaying for sure, but also he is literally on fire, like Aziraphale's bookstore.

The actors like I said before are Michael Sheen and David Tennant but this is the place where I finally admit that I don't actually know who is whom. I'm going to assume Michael is Aziraphale because Michael sounds angel-y and David is Crowley because uh Michaelangelo made David and was gay for him.

Terry Pratchett is not fictional.

He co-wrote the book with @neil-gaiman, who IS fictional, because he does not have social media. Several of you have assured me that he is in fact a fandom inside joke. I like to think he would be proud of me.

They adopt a preteen and Crowley gives him bad advice.

At some point a baby was delivered to someone and was exchanged for the son of Satan. Idk if the baby is the preteen, or the son of satan is the preteen, or neither. This could be a fanfic, I have no way of differentiating the fanfic from canon on tumblr, except that the canon is weirder.

Crowley does not go down a chute. He goes down a telephone cord after making himself microscopic to pole dance on a pin with shroom-induced backgrounds.

During this his stage name is Disco Tony. Get it king go slay you're making better life choices than I am tbh.

Aziraphale is a biblically accurate angel, and you have all gone to extensive lengths to prove this to me. I understood nothing, but there you go.

It's all very queer, just like the fandom.

Crowley is a retired demon but he still sins by breaking the speed limit.

They eat at fancy restaurants and bicker but like in a sexual undercurrent way.

Crowley gives Aziraphale a private dance that is not a lap dance, it is an apology dance, but not in a kinky way, until it is.

Their haircuts keep changing and range from 'this is acceptable and gay' to 'i let a drunk chimpanzee take gardening shears and a blowtorch to my hair'

It's all ineffably queer my good fellows

Everyone keeps trying to convince me Neil Gaiman is the villain yeah no guys I know it's really you. Y'all be like 'SEASON TWO BROKE ME' and then you're making headcanons to make it sadder yeah I see you mmhm.

There is a final fifteen. It is sad. What is it? No one told me.

The demon turns goats into crows and the angel turns them back and then children are turned into newts (does the angel turn them back? who cares not yall) and the demon was the snake in the Eden garden and everyone's furry game seems to be on point.

There are a rather lot of children. I have not seen them. But I am assured they are there. They are, guys. I assume they were turned into the alcohol Aziraphale and Crowley drink or something.

There was an apocalypse plotline. It was averted. It is not important. You don't talk about plotlines in this fandom, no sir.

Crowley doesn't want to go to heaven. Aziraphale is sad.

The kiss is not nice, just like this fandom. It is queer, just like this fandom. It is sad and desperate and masochistic, just like this fandom.

Aziraphale doesn't want to stay back with Crowley. Crowley is sad.

Season 2 ends. Fandom is sad.

Everyone's sanity is hinging on the promise of a happy ending in season 3. Good luck guys.

Y'all better appreciate this. I can't even boast to my mother about this legacy of mine, hey mum your son has been held hostage kidnapped inducted into a cult adopted by a fandom he's not part of look he's winning at life.

#good omens #good omens fandom #ineffably queer #good omens summary #good ineffable omens #aziraphale #crowley #azirafell #aziracrow #azirowley #aziraphel #just tumblr things #masochistic fandom #we could have been us #tell me you said no #angel #demon #unforgivable #wall slam #6000 years of pining #queer #lgbtqia #accurately summarised good omens #reblog at your peril to ruin someone else's life #deadbeat parent #absentee parent #aka god #lot of gay eye contact #ineffable husbands #god's plan doesnt exist??

[venusforfran]

Full Definitive S2 Good Omens Recap

Essentially, to illustrate both to myself and others, I’ve created basically a list of everything that happens per episode, including time-frames in order to both understand the plot better, and to force everything into a somewhat coherent structure for myself. Incredibly spoiler heavy of course, as its every event. This took like two hours. Enjoy!

Episode 1- The Arrival

Crowley and Aziraphale are shown as angels before the beginning.

Crowley creates a “star factory.”

Present day 2023

Aziraphale visits Maggie’s Record Shop to pick up several classical records. 

Aziraphale lets Maggie off with the rent she is due to pay.

Crowley is approached by Shax alone at a park bench, she tells him something is “up” with heaven and gives him his mail.

Maggie visits the coffee shop to see Nina and talk to her, they watch a naked Gabriel make his way to the bookshop.

Aziraphale takes him inside the shop and questions him (with poor results).

Gabriel mentions a something terrible. He is also renamed Jim.

Michael speaks on the phone up in heaven about Gabriel’s missing status.

Shax approaches Crowley as he’s throwing away his bills beside his car, telling him that the problem is that Gabriel is missing.

In the bookshop, Aziraphale opens the box, finding it empty.

Crowley and Aziraphale reconvene at the coffee shop a “naked man friend” is mentioned.

Crowley finds Gabriel in the bookshop, he angrily questions him.

Aziraphale and Crowley argue in the background about how Aziraphale wants to protect him and Crowley does not. Crowley storms off.

In the street, Crowley has his melt down.

This sets off the emergency lock system in the coffee shop thus Maggie and Nina are locked in together, with both phones dead,

Uriel and Michael in heaven discuss Muriel finding an empty matchbox on the floor of heaven.

On earth, Beelzebub takes Crowley to hell, offering him a promotion and somewhat protection if he brings in Gabriel. 

Crowley drives back to the bookshop, unlocking the coffee shop in the process.

Crowley does the “apology dance” for leaving.

They decide to perform a half miracle to hide Gabriel, believing it’ll be less noticeable. 

Heaven finds out they did the miracle.

Episode 2: The Clue

Land Of Uz- Past. FLASHBACK

Crawley kills Job’s goats upon a mountain. Aziraphale tries to thwart him, but its revealed the demons have a permit from God.

Up in heaven, Aziraphale discovers that all of Job’s livestock and children will be killed, but replaced with double the amount. Aziraphale says that they’d perhaps like to keep their old children.

Present day- 2022

Shax threatens Crowley in his Bentley, believing they are hiding Gabriel within the bookshop.

Maggie tells Aziraphale about her difficulty with Nina and love life in the record shop. He says he’ll get back to her.

Aziraphale asks about the song “Everyday” by Buddy Holly as he heard Jim singing it, Maggie tells him a pub in Edinburgh has the song constantly on repeat on their jukebox.

Uriel, Michael and Sahaquiel interrogate Aziraphale within his bookshop, he tells them it was to make Nina and Maggie fall in love. They let him know someone will check this.

Aziraphale invites Crowley to the local pub, telling him he has to get them to fall in love before Heaven realizes its a lie.

Mr Brown, the head of the “Street Traders Association” asks Aziraphale to host a meeting. He accepts.

Jim speaks of the beginning in a trance like state for a few seconds.

Land Of Uz- Past FLASHBACK

Crawley speaks to Job and his wife, creating a narrative that he is an old friend, he demands to see their children.

When Crawley arrives, Aziraphale tries to stop him from hurting the children.

When he is about to leave, the goats are revealed to have been turned into the crows in the yard.

The pair greet the three children of Job, with Aziraphale warns them about the demon trying to kill them.

Crawley sets the room on fire, but they all fall into the cellar.

They are turned into lizards by Crawley.

Crawley attempts to tempt Aziraphale to wine, he refuses, however accepts the pork happily.

The day after, God speaks to Job.

The angels arrive and tells them they get double everything.

Crawley performs a trick to let them have their previous children. Aziraphale lies to them and says its definitely new children.

Hours or possibly days later, Crowley comes to Aziraphale at a cliff side, he reassures Aziraphale that he wont be taken to hell for lying about Job’s children.

Episode 3- I know Where I’m Going (The Ressurectionists)

Mrs.Sandwich and Nina have a conversation about Lindsay's control in the coffee shop.

Muriel visits the bookshop to check that Nina and Maggie are actually in love, instead Crowley and Aziraphale talk in the backroom and Muriel is told that humans take a few days to fall in love.

Aziraphale leaves in the Bentley for Edinburgh.

Edinburgh 1827

Crowley has invited Aziraphale to view a statue of Gabriel in a graveyard.

They come across a grave-robber (Elspeth) and help transport the body to the surgeon who uses it for medical research.

Present day-2022

Aziraphale messes with the Bentley mid-trip.

Down in hell, Demon Josh talks to Beezlebub regarding Gabriel.

Back in the bookshop, Crowley is essentially baby-sitting and cleaning the bookshop.

Edinburgh 1827

Aziraphale makes the body unusable with a miracle, Elspeth goes home empty handed.

Aziraphale has to consult himself morally regarding medical research over a drink with Crowley and Aziraphale.

Present day 2022

Aziraphale arrives in Edinburgh, enters the pub and discovers Gabriel had visited with a year ago, around the same day the jukebox changed entirely to “Everyday”.

Edinburgh 1827

Morag (Elspeth’s) friend is shot by a gravegun trap in the graveyard digging up bodies.

They hide in a mausoleum.

Morag dies before Aziraphale can intervene, Morag is taken to the surgeon almost instantly by Elspeth, she steals a bottle of laudanum.

In the mausoleum, Elspeth attempts suicide by drinking the laudanum, Crowley drinks it instead and is dragged to hell.

Present day- 2022

Aziraphale returns to the graveyard and borrows two local’s phones to call Crowley.

After the phone call, Crowley tries to force Nina and Maggie under an awning by manipulating the weather, it backfires.

Jim speaks another prophecy.

Crowley speaks to Shax on the streets, learning that Beezlebub knows Gabriel is in the bookshop, but refuses to let her in.

Episode 4- The Hitchhiker (Zombie Flesh Eaters.)

Present day- 2022

Aziraphale, on his way back from Edinburgh, picks up a hitchhiker, Shax in disguise threatens him and knows the whereabouts of Gabriel.

London 1941- Post church bombing

Crowley drives Aziraphale just after the bombing to a theatre to deliver some black market alcohol, it turns out to be all smashed by the bombs. Aziraphale takes over for the lack of magician.

Down in hell, thousands of Nazi’s are being admitted, among them Mr. Harmony, Mr. Glozier and Greta Kleinschmid are allowed to return to earth as zombies for 24 hours in order to gain proof of Aziraphale and Crowley collaborating.

Aziraphale and Crowley purchase a bullet rifle magic kit, it goes well, despite their miracles being paused for a moment by the demon FurFur.

FurFur gets a photo of the two on stage, and behind the stage, shows them it, saying their in trouble. 

When returning to hell, FurFur discovers Aziraphale had performed a magic trick to switch out the photo with a show poster.

Present day- 2022

In hell, Shax requests a legion of demons to attack the bookshop, this is permitted.

Episode 5- The Ball

Present day- 2022

The two go around Soho to get people to come to the street traders meeting through bribery.

In hell, Shax is preparing the demons for the attack.

Crowley becomes infuriated with Jim and tells, and also stops him from jumping out the window.

In heaven, Muriel tells Michael about what she found, and how Aziraphale has an assistant, Nothing comes from it.

Aziraphale sets up for a Jane Austen inspired ball in the bookshop, everyone arrives.

The legions of hell arrive, they cannot enter the bookshop though, Gabriel tries to go outside, but hell doesn't recognize him due to the half-miracle.

Crowley “hands himself in” to Muriel standing on the street in order to visit heaven.

Episode 6- Every Day

Present day- 2022

Aziraphale begins to set up the portal in the bookshop.

Crowley and Muriel in heaven review Gabriel’s files, learning that Gabriel didn’t want a second Armageddon, and is heavily demoted.

On earth, Maggie accidentally lets the demons in, some are destroyed with the portal, but eventually fire extinguishers and heavy books are used to keep them back.

Eventually, Aziraphale uses his halo to rid the bookshop of demons instantly.

Everyone reconvenes at the bookshop and it is discovers that Gabriel was “in the fly” and that he is in love with Beezlebub.

The jukebox is explained as being a song Beelzebub enjoyed, so Gabriel miracled the jukebox.

Beezlebub and Gabriel leave to (presumably) Alpha Centauri.

The metatron, unrecognized by the angels originally, sends them back to heaven, leaving just Muriel, Crowley, Aziraphale and himself in the bookshop.

The metatron invites Aziraphale for a chat after giving him some coffee outside the bookshop.

While this is occurring, Maggie and Nina tell Crowley to confess to Aziraphale.

Aziraphale reveals he has the opportunity to become the supreme archangel, Crowley quickly rejects the idea, and then confesses.

Crowley kisses Aziraphale, it is not taken well.

Crowley leaves for his car and Aziraphale joins The Metatron to go back up to heaven.

#good omens #good omens s2 #good omens spoilers #good omens fanart #good omens fanfic #good omens summary #summary #aziraphale #crowley #good omens prime #good omens s2 spoilers #good omens season 2 #good omens 2 #azirafell #crawley

[aumael]

Kind of art summary for 2023. Or Good Omens art summary 😅

#good omens 2 #good omens #crowley #aziraphale #anthony j crowley #thin dark duke #aziracrow #crowley fanart #aziraphale fanart #good omens fanart #fanart #my art #artists on tumblr #drawing #dessin #graphite drawing #traditional art #david tennant #michael sheen #art summary #art summary 2023

[vivenecii]

"Did you, uh... ever meet him?"

"Yes. Seemed a very bright young man. I showed him all the kingdoms of the world."

"Why?"

"He's a carpenter from Galilee. His travel opportunities are limited. [...] That's got to hurt. What was it he said that got everyone so upset?"

"'Be kind to each other.'"

"Oh, yeah. That'll do it."

#as funny as this dialogue is #the “be kind to each other” “yeah that'll do it” part is a summary of every faith crisis I have #you would think that religious people are kind to each other #mostly that's not the case #tell them to be kind and they'll be aggravated as if you personally insulted them #good omens #fanart #traditional #crowley #david tennant #aziraphale #michael sheen

[piratewinzer]

There are four wolves in you. Two are a gay angel/demon couple and they are kissing. Two are a gay pirate couple and they are kissing. They are melting your sanity into a viscous soup. There is no escape.

#in summary #good omens #good omens 2 #crowley #aziraphale #ofmd #our flag means death #edward teach #stede bonnet #blackbeard #gentleman pirate #i am falling into disrepair

[dingledraw]

The IT GIRLS (Rival models au?? Jk… unless👀)

🔥Outfit inspo 🔥

#plot summary #they are rival models!! #but also gay #the luxury brand…Janthony #Aziraphale has to call in thicc tomorrow 😂 #hey diva we’re calling you down into the slaytion for the transvestigation led by Detective Fierce. #we’re gonna ask you some queerstions. are you ready sis? #crowley #aziraphale #good omens #ineffable spouses #my fanart #aziracrow #fem!aziraphale #fem!crowley #ineffeble wives

[petite-madame]

Art Summary 2023: It’s that time of the year again!

This year was really for me “The year of fine fabrics” because a lot of artworks I created were excuses to paint velvet, silk and embroideries. See you next year with even more fine fabrics and over the top outfits (all sported by my favorite characters, obviously 🤓). I'm also going to try to finish the 20 WIPs I have in my "WIP folder" and not to start anything new *sigh*. Happy Holidays 🥳💖

PS: if you want to see artworks that were not posted on Tumblr you have the list HERE.

#stucky #ineffable husbands #johnlock #destiel #sherlock #good omens #marvel #myart #art summary

[cliopadra]

It’s the 31st, so I guess it’s time for an annual art summary again?

2023 was kinda…meh, ngl. Had to use a different summary template than before because my usual looked dull and painfully empty with this year’s lot.

Really hope 2024 turns out a bit better🤞

#cliopadra blabbers on #my art #my art crap #art summary #good omens #ofmd

[procrastiel]

Crowley: let’s run off into the sunset together uwu

Aziraphale: but how can i protecc u if we haven’t dismantled the oppressive hierarchical system yet, u silly

#aziraphale x crowley #i present to you #my fav tv show #in a nutshell #good omens #good omens 2 #sigh #ineffable idiots #ineffable husbands #ineffable lovers #ineffable fandom #welcome to my ted talk #a summary #the final fifteen #this is what I heard anyway

[fuckyeahgoodomens]

ANOTHE NEW SUMMARY! :)👀❤

Originally based on Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman’s international best-selling novel,Good Omens 2 explores storylines that go beyond the original source material to illuminate the ineffable friendship between Aziraphale (Michael Sheen), a fussy angel and rare-book dealer, and the fast-living demon Crowley (David Tennant). Having been on Earth since The Beginning, and with the Apocalypse thwarted, the duo are getting back to easy living amongst mortals in London’s Soho. That is, until the archangel Gabriel (Jon Hamm) turns up unexpectedly at the door of Aziraphale's bookshop with no memory of who he is or how he got there. While Crowley is leery as to why the archangel has come to the bookshop, Aziraphale is keen to solve the mystery behind Gabriel’s condition. However, hiding the archangel from both Heaven and Hell quickly disrupts their lives in unforeseen ways. To solve this mystery and thwart Heaven and Hell in the process, the duo will need more than a miracle; they’ll need to once again rely on each other.

A mystery that takes us from before The Beginning, to biblical times, grave robbing in Victorian Edinburgh, the Blitz of 1940s England, all the way through to modern day, Good Omens 2 stars Michael Sheen and David Tennant as angel Aziraphale and demon Crowley, respectively. Also reprising their roles are Jon Hamm as archangel Gabriel, Doon Mackichan as archangel Michael, and Gloria Obianyo as archangel Uriel. Returning this season in new roles are Miranda Richardson as demon Shax, Maggie Service as Maggie, and Nina Sosanya as Nina, with new faces joining the misfits in Heaven and Hell: Liz Carr as angel Saraqael, Quelin Sepulveda as angel Muriel, and Shelley Conn as demon Beelzebub.

#good omens #gos2 #season 2 #s2 summary #👀

[wisesnail]

The year is about to end, and it's time for a 2023 Recap <;

I know I'll be busy in the next few days (with prayer that 2024 is kinder to me than 2023, in some respects), so I'll leave this here a bit earlier than usual <:

And as I always say, upwards and onwards!

#2023 recap #summary of art #wisesnail #iwtv #hannibal #tgf #shi qingxuan #good omens #mdzs #the untamed #oppenheimer #cillian murphy #lee dong wook #miyavi #loki

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

pt IV good omens but all i know is i watched three episodes on a stream with you all

Three hours being in a server with good omens fans in the wild *insert random emojis to sound like optimum clickbait youtuber except this ain't clickbait*

Okay I woke up. Before everything just WASHES out of my brain, I'm gonna describe whatever happened last night best as I can, because that's what I do.

Some of you were unable to attend the stream, and were sad. But don't worry I got you guys here's the rundown:

people joined the server. people were confused. i was afraid. i was assured that i should be, which was meant to comfort me.

people introduced themselves. someone said they had worked in a brothel as a bartender, which was cool, they said they had many stories. they did not elaborate for fear of scaring the newcomers. The newcomers, aka, me, were already scared, and it was not of the brothel stories.

I brought an emotional support orange with me. It looked uncomfortable. I thought it would be rotten. It was not, but we would not know that until later.

@thescholarlystrumpet entered fabulously, and started the stream.

i didn't realise the show had started for a good two minutes because there was a random voice over that was telling us about Earth's star sign (Libra) and somehow that didn't compute in my brain as being part of the episode. I thought we were checking audio.

It turned out, the episode had begun, and everyone was acting like this is a completely normal way for a show to start.

We time-jumped from the fall of man to modern day society so fast that I got whiplash.

There were a lot of orgasmic noises. I asked why. I was told in no uncertain terms that those were screams of labour. I'm sorry to everyone who has given birth ever.

There were three babies. I tried to keep track, it was hard. I thought the Antichrist won prizes for tropical fish. I was wrong.

I fell in love with Crowley and his hips and was very gay on the chat. This was heartily applauded.

I didn't realise an hour had passed when the episode ended, which it seemed was to be a common theme. I said nothing happened which everyone found funny for some reason.

I was very concerned about Armageddon. Everyone assured me that it would take place over the course of the season. I asked why we'd speedrun through millennia in five minutes but eight days took several episodes. I was a naive fool. Time is a social construct and this show cares not for social constructs.

They fucked up the mission. This was also to be a common theme.

I begged for a break and had to shake my head to try and get the brain rot out. I did not succeed.

The second episode commenced. The intro concerned me, because the cartoon Aziraphale looked pregnant or like a chicken. I asked if Crowley had impregnated him. He had not.

The pornography scene had to be replayed because I was so lost and had not relished it properly.

There was a lot of crying on the chat. Every few minutes someone would say a normal sentence in English and everyone would respond with crying emojis. Needless to say, I was concerned. This was also to be a common theme.

I asked why we were talking about random children. I was told it was The Them and they were the Antichrist's friends. I liked the hellhound.

I wanted to adopt the Antichrist, and grew more thirsty for Crowley every time he was a casual accessory to murder. I'm relying on this fandom not to use this as evidence with the cops. The chat was not reassuring, they said maybe.

I thirsted for Crowley more. This was also to be a common theme.

Aziraphale was very cute, I realised. That was nice. It was not nice when he had gay panic and said mean things to Crowley and they broke up. This was also to be a common theme.

I got so gay for Crowley that I ate the emotional support orange. It was gaseous. The chat was concerned, and everyone got excited every time oranges were mentioned after.

The third episode was a fucking roller coaster. Crowley and Aziraphale were your average high school couple but biblical for 6000 years.

Both were casual accessories to murder, and sometimes the cause of the murders, before going out for a date. Crowley got horny and he stopped listening every time Aziraphale ate. This was also to be a common theme.

The chat was keeping count of the husband breakups. This was not nice.

The Bentley was silver in many scenes, and people were forced to concede that they saw it. I was smug.

Crowley was sexy. She served gender, or as some people in the chat said, she served cunt. Her hairstyles got better and better. No one liked the 60s one. I did. I like everything she does. I love him.

Things happened. The fandom infected me. Someone mentioned how the book said Crowley felt lonely. I was near tears.

Crowley walked down the aisle for Aziraphale. We all were happy.

The book case, the thermos, the bandstand. I was broken.

Everyone said very emotional goodbyes.

I made a post on tumblr that was absolutely incomprehensible but accurately conveyed my love for Crowley. I fell asleep.

Same time next week, I believe.

I hope this was an adequate summary of the livestream for everyone, I am broken irreparably and if anyone mentions the bandstand I will have to start drinking and not stop till I get a happy ending. I cannot afford alcohol. I will ferment grapes myself if I have to.

#good omens #good omens mascot #good omens summary #good omens livestream #go livestream summarised #episode 3 good omens #good omens 1 #crowley #crowley serving gender #aziraphale #aziracrow #azirowley #aziraley #the j was just a j #weirdly-specific-but-ok #yall adopted me and broke me thanks #david tennant #michael sheen #good omens fandom #you all need therapy #i need therapy now #gay #queer #lgbtqia #queer tv shows #is this my life now #the good omens mascot #whom you have traumatised #is here to serve

[lilpy]

🪄 Art Summary 2023 🖼️

These are ALL paintings I made to print as postcards later and I'm SO proud 🌟 Thank you to everyone who made this possible!

Number 12 is a little sneak peak for next month 🥰

#art summary #good omens #my art

[actual-changeling]

"I love you."

Crowley stops dead in his tracks, his hand wrapped around the door knob with white, trembling knuckles, and closes his eyes.

There were nights, many nights, way more than there ever should have been, during which he traced the constellations in the night sky and imagined what it would be like to hear those words from his mouth. Whether he would say them softly, wrapping each one in gentleness, reverence, or hurried, afraid of who else might hear, terrified that this will be the last words ever spoken between them. If he was particularly drunk and particularly lonely, chasing after the feeling of Aziraphale's brushing over his wrist as they walked by each other in the comfortable mess of the bookshop, he imagined them as a slow drag of breath right next to his hear, a whisper not even God would be able to hear; a promise of worship.

In all of the fantasies, and that is what they were, nothing more than shameful imaginations Aziraphale could never know about, he said it back. Whispered it, screamed it, forced it out between sobs or kisses or panting breaths.

When Crowley opens his eyes again, uncried tears are clinging to his lashes.

Outside, the first splatters of rain are painting the sidewalk black and people hurry by, trying to escape the storm as the sky breaks in two. Within seconds, the steady drum of water against the window is louder than the noise of the traffic, louder than his heart's attempts to beat out of his ribcage and bare itself to him.

He cannot look at him.

It is his first thought and the only one that matters now, he cannot look at him or he will shatter like hot glass dropped in the snow, flying apart into thousands of tiny shards. Crowley tries to rip the image of violet eyes and his perfect fucking cupids bow out of his mind without success (he knows what it tastes like now, remembers tracing it with the tip of his tongue and opening his mouth with a hunger he has never felt before).

Swallowing his own, he listens to the familiar rhythm of Aziraphale's breath, undisturbed and distinctly human in a way that makes them too human to be real, his mouth opening and closing around unshaped replies.

The sidewalk is empty save for a handful of people diving for cover in the pub across the street, and for one precious, fragile moment, the world narrows down to an angel and a demon who watched the first storm rain down on Eden, a white wing held steadily above his head to keep him dry.

Crowley never asked why, and over the centuries, the question got lost in all the others piling up every time they met. He knows why, though, without needing to hear it from him, and it is not because Aziraphale already loved him back then or saw a pitiful creature in need of protection. The answer is so much simpler - he was being thoughtlessly kind because that is who he is.

He is being thoughtlessly kind now, too.

The tension drains from his knuckles and he presses his palm to the cold metal, settling back into a body that now recalls the taste of those three words in the air and yearns for nothing more than to taste them straight from his mouth.

Crowley pushes the door open and steps onto the sidewalk, his clothes clinging to his sharp angles as the rain drenches him completely within seconds, and then he walks home without a single look or word back.

#alex writes good omens #good omens #ineffable husbands #crowley #aziraphale #good omens season 2 #go2 #aziracrow #crowley x aziraphale #ineffable divorce #in my head this is part of a longer fic that eventually has a happy ending #and idk if this makes much sense without context #very quick context summary is supreme archangel aziraphale back in the bookshop and crowley is having a fucking crisis #they had a bit of an argument before this and it's a parallel to the i forgive you #but have it anyway mostly cause it hurts and i love pain

[rrcenic]

love you all <33

people i mentioned: @cissyenthusiast010155 @thatdumbgoth @that-other-fruity-emo @chaoticstateofaffairs @mccall-me-maurice @peachtaglia @nickwildelvr @twinknightmare @felixfeliccis @sw1tchbladef1ghts @casimirt and a ton of other folks i forgot but love all the same 😭😭😭

#nics stuff #happy new year #genshin impact #my art #year summary #2024 #new years #lotf #dps #good omens #les mis

[eviebane]

you guys loved my part 1 and 2 of Badly Explained Good Omens so i'm just going to keep doing it. fight me. (disclaimer: this series will be written when i'm either sleep deprived, caffeine overloaded, or drunk. feel free to speculate which one it is this time)

right so Season 1 of Good Omens is basically, these two man-shaped creatures who definitely don't want to lick each other's faces get together in a park full of spies & snitches so they can talk without raising suspicion (foolproof plan, obviously). it's basically a romeo and juliet thing, except romeo is an angelic bookseller hoarder and juilet is a snake demon who will make u re-evaluate your sexual orientation. and possibly give you gender envy. your average stuff, right.

so gender envy boy (Crowley) goes, hey, my lot made me uber the devil's son to an american diplomat the other night, and the angel (Aziraphale) goes, if you're going to destroy the world via evil baby style, can you lot at least not make it into some cheesy american movie. at least make it something actually cool. anyway so they're chatting about the end of the world, as you do, and Crowley goes y'know, Hell is gonna fuck the whole world up and Azi goes Nah, we beat your dumbarses before, we will again, and Crowley goes ANYWAY if everyone gets slaughtered, guess what? no more food, no more music. your life is gonna be boring af

so they go on a little date and Crowley keeps winding him up about how boring shit's gonna be when all the humans have been murdered in the ethereal/occult purge, and Aziraphale finally goes Yeah OK, but you realise I can't do shit about it right? like it's God's will and Crowley goes Nah nah nah, look. Look. Right. so I gotta look after this devil child for a few years and use my sexy nanny vibes to make sure he's evil. why don't YOU also infiltrate this devil child's household and teach him not to kill snails? it'll be like cosmic balance. yin/yang. the kid will be a normal little shit like most preteen boys, rather than starting apocalypses little shit.

Aziraphale is so captivated by his slutty charm and sparkling eyes that he agrees.

so they stalk the kid, dress up like old welsh gardeners and dominatrix nanny to teach him to love slugs and crush his foes under his boot. surprisingly, the kid is relatively normal. although he hates dinosaurs, so that's obviously concerning. Crowley suggests cold blooded murder of the child but Aziraphale's like Nah why don't i cosplay Fell the Marvellous again at his birthday party and Crowley goes why the fuck do I love this loser

anyway so as it turns out, the nuns that Crowley uber'd this baby to 11 years ago ended up with the wrong parents. The best friends husbands roadtrip to go fuck up the nuns, but actually Crowley's maggot colleague (no thats not an insult) burned the nunnery down and it's now a paintball arena, where currently a bunch of repressed office workers are shooting each other. there's a noteworthy bit where the husbands get hit with a paintball, Crowley becomes a naga (except reverse the top and bottom bits. Yeah it's terrifying) just to make a dude shit himself, then Aziraphale puppy dog eyes Crowley to get the stain off his coat because it ruins his vibes and that's not kool.

Crowley tries to make out with Aziraphale against the wall but then forgets the kissing part, then he bippity-boppity-boos a surviving ex-nun so they can interrogate her. the whole trip is pretty useless and it ends up becoming just them two flirt-fighting for a day. Oh also Crowley runs over a witch, but it's fine because she's an American

As it turns out, the witch left a book behind in Crowley's car and Aziraphale yoinks it like the book kleptomaniac he is, then binges it like your new favourite 150k fanfic

Crowley literally climbs the walls in boredom (unfortunately got cut, but still happened in my mind). They eventually meet up in Secret Rendezvous Spot #3 where they have a lover's quarrel and Crowley slut walks off

Next thing ya know, there's a witchfinder (yea don't worry too much about him) at Aziraphale's door and he tries to exorcise him via a prophecy book, a cute little retro desk bell and a fuckin lighter. Anyway.

So Aziraphale was trying to talk to God before the nutbag showed up via a magic angel circle that does a little star trek hologram. He ends up talking to God's secretary (not the fun kind) and he's like, Yeah no God's having PTO rn. Also you're being drafted into war 'cause shit's about to go down and Aziraphale's like Ahhh ok cool neat. let me just like, do a bit of tidying up first, oh and I have to pick up the dry cleaning, um then I need to make dinner, so anyway i'll be there soon. totally. yup. so excited to go fight hot sexy with pretty yellow eyes- bad, evil demons.

Aziraphale accidently cha cha slides into the circle and his body crumbles (same) and he pops into Heaven without a body. He gets yelled at by Anderson for not having a body or that sword he gave the humans 6000 years ago, and honestly I can't help but think it's Heaven's fault for not stock taking enough

Aziraphale's like Haha yeah Anderson I'm not fighting no war, I have a hot sexy yellow-eyed pretty beautiful smart funny demon to ki- uuuh, I mean, I'm a pacifist now, BYE and he yeets himself back to the mortal plane via a floaty picture of Earth

He finds Crowley going on a bender and doodling A+C=<3 on the pub table. Aziraphale's like Right Crowley get your shit together, we got an Apocalypse to stop in Tadfield

Crowley ends up getting trapped in London via a giant doom circle of fire that he designed, but he's like Ah nah fuck it, my Bentley can take it and it DOES. I mean it does explode, but only after it gets him to Tadfield. What a stellar car. 10/10

The husbands try to murder the child with a fireworks gun, that fails, then they watch the child encourage his friends to insult three cosmic beings to death. Yah it actually works, too.

The child then insults Lucifer into the void, and that's it, ba ba boom, apocalypse averted. The husbands do what they do best; get crunk.

Heaven & Hell kidnap the husbands and tries to give them their Worst Employee of the Century rewards, but the husbands survive it via clever trickery and Being A Little Shit, and they ride off into the sunset and confess their love at the Ritz via affectionate insults

the end

season 2

#good omens #crowley #aziraphale #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #goodomens #gomens #badly explained good omens #crack #for the record i have written an entire (yes all 4 books) summary of the hunger games if anyone wants it. its as appalling as this is