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#honestly i got really tired at the background part so i kinda gave up lol
distorted-graffiti · 2 years
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No matter what I try,
It’s no use apparently.
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Warning: long rant. Probably messed up grammar. Not LXC-friendly.
So Pinterest gave me this:
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And I was like
Ah yes, Lan Xichen.
I mean, I love that guy, but oh gosh that man is BLIND. Like, man's so blind Xue Yang could use him to slaughter people.
(I'm so sorry for that joke)
I really loved him when I first read the book, esp pre-Nightless City, but then I read it for the second (and third) time and that love turned into "uhh, I guess I kinda like him?"
I mean, in Sunshot Campaign arc, NMJ just got freaking tortured. He just got beaten, made to watch his men die, and his former deputy "betrayed" him -- and then LXC was just like, "oh da-ge CALM down, this is all part of OUR plan, A-Yao's our spy lol put Baxia away don't shout at him smh"
Why didn't LXC say to NMJ that the whole thing had been orchestrated? Okay, I get it, maybe he couldn't risk JGY getting caught, but couldn't he just tell NMJ, "hey, this is the plan. You're gonna get caught at Yangquan by WRH and our spy will take care of the rest of it" ? I'm pretty sure NMJ was angrier about his men getting slaughtered than himself getting beaten. NMJ is kinda like WWX; they were both idiots, but they cared about their people. Pretty sure he cared more about his men than himself. If he knew about the "plan", he'd most likely bring the disciples who were ready to die.
THEN LXC just went to NMJ like, "Hey let's be sworn brothers!". Xichen, dude, his wounds aren't even healed. I mean, it's a bit insensitive right?? I think it is. The whole sworn-brotherhood-right-after-shunshot-campaign thing still bothers me. To me, it seems like no one cared about NMJ. I mean, he was the leader of SC, people used his skills, his men, his everything, and then he was just, like, casted aside?? Pretty sure man's got PTSD. Also, qi deviation. Oh gosh I forgot about qi deviation.
Anyway, yeah, LXC was blind throughout the novel. I won't talk about the scene where Wangxian tried to tell him that A-Yao = bad, but I will talk about the scene where NHS decided to "use" his er-ge to kill his san-ge. Was it intentional? Perhaps. Was NHS lying? Maybe. Was it bad? Absolutely. Was it expected? Of course.
Let's put ourselves in NHS' shoes for a second. Your big bro, who is also the one who raised you and the only family you have left, died. People are quacking "oh it's the Nie curse, and isn't it such a tragedy?" BUT NO! One day you be minding your own business and then BAM you found out that da-ge'd been murdered and mutilated AND betrayed. So you started scheming for like a decade. Everything was going great, as great as a 10 years revenge plan could ever be. You just gotta wait for a few more hours, you just gotta listen to your nemesis' retelling his sad background story, you just gotta endure the pain of seeing your dead big bro wrecking havoc, and you'd have your revenge.
Then of course your er-ge, your big bro's best friend, gotta help your big bro's killer. He just gotta treat his wounds, huh? Pretty sure NHS was unstable. He was desperate and maybe even full of wrath. I understand that, at least, the same way I understand that maybe LXC tried to treat JGY's wounds because he still saw him as his brother -- he didn't want to lose another brother. But how about NHS? He was watching the man whom he thought was his brother treating the man who betrayed and murdered his actual brother. NHS was being a dick, yeah, but it was expected.
Think about this for a second. NMJ's corpse was still right there (and gosh, NHS had to sew his big bro's corpse by himself). NHS was RIGHT there, and LXC had the audacity to tend to JGY's wounds after the man himself admitted to his crimes. I think it's understandable if NHS felt at least insulted.
Also, he was perhaps sick of people not thinking that his big brother was as important as other people, that he was also a human being instead of just a war machine or even a mere tool that can be casted aside whenever they want to. Why did his brother have to die because of other people's greed and selfish decisions? Why did he have to lose the only family he had left forever and why did he have to just sit back and accept it?
Most importantly, LXC had been too blind for more than a decade too long.
Also, the bit about "You're Wangji's only mistake":
Bruh.
If WWX is LWJ's only mistake, then (trusting) LXC is NMJ's only mistake. I mean, sure, WWX is as dumb and oblivious as a rock, but can you really blame him?? HE WAS TRYING TO KEEP HIMSELF, HIS FAMILY, AND THE WEN REMNANTS ALIVE, DUDE'S GOT NO TIME TO THINK ABOUT FKING ROMANCE.
Sorry, I got carried away.
Anyway, are we just gonna ignore the fact that LWJ had been acting like he hated WWX since, like, the first time they met?? I mean, I really love LWJ, but his only mistake is his communication skills (or lack thereof).
But LWJ never gave up on WWX. He learned to express himself way better. Man's got dedication and he's not afraid to learn. I really love that about him.
Also, I understand that LXC was angry because LWJ took beatings to protect WWX, but I don't think he had the right to blame WWX for that. Yes, I know WWX did plenty of things wrong; he was extremely reckless and untrusting, but he never asked LWJ to protect him. LWJ did everything voluntarily. Ffs Xichen WWX didn't even know that LWJ did that. You know why? CAUSE HE WAS FKING DYING THAT'S WHY.
TLDR: LWJ was a grown ass man.
Okay. So, do I hate LXC? No. But do I find him flawed? Yes. But that's why I like MXTX's characters, including WRH, JGY, and LXC (the only exception are perhaps JGS and MXY's fam, and I think we all know why). They all have flaws. For me, LXC is too naive and blind, JGY is too power-hungry and selfish, and NMJ is too stubborn and unyielding. NHS? Well, he's a lot of things. He's manipulative, unsympathetic, and IMO he's got a problem with obsession too. He and JGY are alike, in my opinion. The main difference is their goals: JGY seeks power, NHS seeks revenge.
Everyone has flaws. LWJ and WWX have flaws too; they're EXTREMELY flawed. Heck, even our lord and saviour Shijie also has flaws, as much as it hurts me to type that.
Then why do I get so worked up about LXC's flaws? Honestly I don't really know. Maybe it's because I'm tired of (almost) the entirety of fandom treating him like a god, maybe because I'm tired of people who treat NHS like the devil himself, or maybe because I'm disappointed in him. I mean, JGY's our main villain, but I still love him so much. Heck, I love him even more than I love LXC. Bruh, nowadays I even like WRH more. At least that guy is downright evil and he looks cool while doing whatever evil things WRH does (I'm talking about the novel and donghua mmkay).
Anyway, this is the end of my rant. I apologise if I'm offending you, this is just something that's been bothering me since the first time I re-read MDZS. This whole thing is like a plot bunny but instead of a "plot", the bunny is shaped like a "rant". This is a rant bunny. I need to get this outta my head. I've edited this thing like four times already because I keep finding errors and stuffs. I also added like two new paragraphs.
I'm sad now.
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kitkatopinions · 3 years
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Accidentally deleted my Tyrian and Watts asks while I was trying to fix a mistake so... Sorry about that, everyone! Here they are! Tyrian and Watts for the RWBY character asks!
Let’s do Tyrian first, because I have less to say about him, I feel like.
My top three ships for the character
Tyrian/Watts. Dysfunctional villainous romance of the century, no one knows how they’ve managed to make it to their tenth anniversary without killing each other, including them. Tyrian/Salem is my second top ship for him. Major Bellatrix/Voldy vibes with this one, but I could see it. Tyrian/Hazel is my third ship for lack of options. Does this one make sense? No. But I can at least see Tyrian being super flirty and Hazel being endlessly tired, but never really stopping it. (Also I hate Hazel so much lol.)
My three least favorite ships for the character
Tyrian/Qrow sucks for me. Like... I kinda feel like two people fighting each other just gets shippers, which is fine and totally understandable. But for me, Tyrian poisoning Qrow and almost killing him and calling his beloved niece a bitch and then killing Clover is a big no from me, dog. On that note! Tyrian/Clover is also one big no from me, since Clover murdered him. And Tyrian/Ozpin is another really big no from me. Tyrian and his crazy Salem worship can stay five hundred and fifty feet away from my son.
My biggest criticism for the character
They went a little too much on the crazy in the fourth and fifth season and it made him feel annoying. Like, I don’t mind the Bellatrix vibes, but I do mind the movie version Bellatrix vibes, sometimes. It just got kinda annoying. I wish his crazy was always more on the dangerous side and less on the kooky side, but that’s just personal opinions.
My favorite thing about the character
The way people are so uncomfortable around him. Whenever Tyrian talks to Emerald or Mercury, he’s honestly freaky. Like both me and the characters are waiting for him to snap. That’s a great quality in a villain that we’re meant to hate or love to hate. He has a real presence and it’s enjoyable.
A headcanon I have about them
Tyrian doesn’t often try to act normal, but he can, and he’s got a great ‘respectable, cool guy’ act that’s actually a little reminiscent of Qrow or Clover. He’s even passed himself as a Huntsman here and there.
What I would change about them if I was making a re-write
More involvement in volumes 4 and 5, and I’d treat him a bit more seriously and make him a bit more dangerous. Maybe I’d have him wound a member of Team RNJR in his attack as well as poison Qrow (maybe give Jaune a reason to unlock his semblance in season 4 and in response to the pain of a member of his team. Also, his ‘Tyrian purple’ color should be more than just the color of his eyes. Like, how come so many RWBY characters season 4 and onward have such boring colors? I’d give Tyrian some strong purple and pink.
What I I think of their character allusion and what (if anything) I would change about it
Tyrian alludes to the animal fable ‘the Scorpion and the Frog,’ and that’s... really in name only, I think. A part of me wants to give them some kind of points for having Qrow work with him against Clover, only for Tyrian to kill Clover, which lines up with his ‘its just my nature’ scorpion stinging the frog so that they’ll both drown and die. But they didn’t mean for Qrow to really be wrong! They didn’t mean for the lesson to be ‘Qrow shouldn’t have trusted the poisonous villain’ it was ‘wowza does Qrow’s semblance hurt him. :( Too bad Clover got himself killed.’ Which makes the whole allusion kind of suck.
Now for Watts, the single best villain in my opinion.
My top three ships for the character
Tyrian/Watts. See above. This ship would be a dysfunctional mess, but it’d be a wild ride. Watts/Villain!Ironwood. I kind of hate this ship when it’s ‘fallen hero turned villain’ Ironwood. But if he actually had been written as a secret villain or obviously headed that way from the start, I can see him and Watts also being a dysfunctional mess of a wild ride ship, only with way more ‘evil power couple’ vibes than Tyrian and Watts would have. Also my favorite version of this features Watts having been the one to build Penny (maybe by stealing the plans from Pietro) and him and Ironwood raising a still bright and cheerful, still innocent and trusting, villain Penny who will attack to kill with a smile on her face and a ‘it was nice meeting you!’ And this is very weird and niche but Watts/Evil Stepsister (specifically the one with the sharp bangs and highlights.) Someone sent me an ask saying the Evil Stepmother and stepsisters should’ve been connected to Salem and gotten Cinder involved and I totally agree with this. I then started envisioning a world where the step sisters competed with Cinder and all three of them were raised in Salem’s circle. In this version of things, I could totally picture one of the step sisters having a romantic tension driven connection with Watts and the two of them subtly flirting sometimes (and bonding over their mutual hatred of Cinder.) I picked the sister with bangs for no real reason except that I like her look more.
My three least favorite ships for the character
Watts/Cinder. Watts thinks of her like a bratty little girl, and Cinder kills him. Watts/Lionheart. Kinda really hate this one because of how clearly Lionheart was terrified of him. Just a bit uncomfortable for me to see that in a relationship. Watts/Hero!Ironwood or Watts/HeroTurnedVillain/Ironwood. Sorry, but Ironwood in canon got such a bad, bad portrayal in season 8 and the end of season 7, and I just can’t help but blame Watts for quite a bit of it. I only like them as a ship if Ironwood is an antagonist from the start.
My biggest criticism for the character
They shouldn’t have killed him! He was one of Salem’s best followers and one of the best villains and it was such a big mistake to kill literally one of the only actual loyal followers. It threw off any character development for Cinder and it was a big mistake. I really wanted the Cinder / Watts / Neo team up to keep going! I’m so disappointed it got thrown away.
My favorite thing about the character
Watts is an entitled, petty bastard, and I think that’s so good for a villain that isn’t meant to be social commentary (because tbh, RWBY never should’ve tried to be social commentary.) Watts isn’t sympathetic, he’s an Atlas born and raised guy in a three piece suit, he’s posh, he’s upset because he wasn’t given exactly what he wanted. Most of the villains in RWBY are either victims of abuse, systemic oppression, or poverty, and that’s... Not fun in a show that’s never handled social commentary well and is about magical girls destroying Voldemort/Satan with the power of friendship (Ruby literally never says anything about Faunus rights iirc.) Watts is refreshing because he’s exactly the type of villain that you can expect in a show like what RWBY should’ve been, and he flourishes as that. Why would we be sympathetic to Watts when he’s just doing this all because he wasn’t picked first for his tech? Why would we feel soured towards conflicts with Watts and Team RWBY? He’s just a petty bastard being evil because he was snubbed. Why would we be frustrated that incredibly significant problems are being shoved to the side with Watts? He’s a fun villain, he’s not meant to be more, he’s not meant to make you emotionally invested only to then be gutted for it. You can hate to love him without it feeling bad. Maybe that’s why he’s just my favorite non-kid villain (other than Roman.)
A headcanon I have about them
Watts has been trying to build his own AI robot like Penny, in his spare time. He wanted it to be done in time to become a Maiden, but it wasn’t, and Salem gave that slot to Cinder and got after Watts for not contributing enough. He of course thought this was deeply unfair (especially after being made to contribute a lot to Cinder’s Beacon success without getting any credit for it.) And this just fueled his hatred of Cinder, his hatred of Pietro and Ironwood, and by extension, his hatred of Penny.
What I would change about them if I was making a re-write
I would keep him freaking alive and keep up the pair up he had going on with Cinder and Neo! But also I’d increase his relationships with Emerald, Mercury, Tyrian, Hazel... Just some more Salem’s Inner Circle moments to flesh out their characters. Other than that, I wouldn’t change much. He’s a pretty good character.
What I I think of their character allusion and what (if anything) I would change about it
Okay, I’ve talked about his character allusion in a very long post awhile ago, but I’m not scrolling down that far to tag it. To sum it up... I hate his allusion. XD I loved the Sherlock Holmes books and read most of them, and I didn’t realize he was supposed to allude to John Watson until I read someone else’s post saying so, and I started freaking out about how awful it was. Watts has so little in common with Watson, he’s essentially the anti-Watson. Which basically means he’s Sherlock Holmes, the opposite of Watson in almost every way, up to and including freaking faking his death which is one of the most iconic Sherlock Holmes thing ever. Watts is everything Sherlock Holmes is on his worst days, arrogant, callous, consumed with his projects, petty, smug, over the top - as well as being hyper intelligent and a genius who often just gets passed over. He has rivalries with his colleagues like Holmes did. And like I said, he faked his death, only to reveal himself to an old friend later on the cusp of carrying out a scheme. He’s evil Holmes! He has nothing to do with John Watson - caring, humble, down to earth, not brilliant like his friend but content to be ordinary and special because of his emotional depth and devoted heart, medical former doctor who spends quite a lot of time chronicling the successes of someone else because he’s content to live in the background. Don’t get me wrong, a ‘Watson’ character who is evil could work - Watson himself indulged in crime for the sake of Holmes sometimes in the original works and if he worshipped Salem or one of her followers and did everything for her while still being a more humble, more friendly, not brilliant person he could be good - but Watts is not that person. Even the gimmicks Watts is given are stupid and don’t make it obvious he’s Watson. Boy’s got a moustache and a revolver and they thought that’d be enough. Idk why they thought 'we’ll make him Watson’ when he’s clearly a Holmes! Also, he’s supposed to be ‘Watson if he’d met Moriarty instead of Holmes,’ and to that I say boo! Watson wouldn’t turn into a super genius just because he meets a different mastermind!
...That’s summing up my feelings, yeah. Because I have so many feelings about his warped, weird character allusion. If I was changing it, I’d just make him Holmes like I think he was clearly supposed to be.
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Daily Blog #15: August 22, 2021
Dollar Tree is honestly pretty fucking awesome 👌👌👌
I set my alarm for like 6:25 this morning, but it took 6 minutes for the "Horsin' Around" theme song instrumental to wake me up. I was pretty tired lol. I just dismissed it and went back to sleep.
I only went back to sleep because I knew I had another alarm set for 7:00. That got me up.
I should mention that this was still in the RV over an hour away from the house.
After I got up, I went to go get a shower, and did so successfully.
Unfortunately, I had forgotten my brush this time and had to do it afterwards after my hair had a bit of time to dry, which did make it a little more difficult lol.
I got dressed and grabbed my stuff, putting it into my car.
I made it a point to see and say "see you later" to my grandparents before I left for the flea market.
My dad insisted that I stayed to say goodbye to my mom, so I left.
I did NOT have cell service up there, as was mentioned in my previous 2 blogs of which I could only post today, so finding my way was a tiny bit difficult until I got some service to ask Google to take me to "...".
It worked and I got there.
On my drive, I listened to 1 by Simple Kid, a CD I had previously purchased at a Dollar Tree location.
I got a call from the guy at the flea market saying that I had some people there waiting for me. He asked how far away I was, to which I said "about 10 minutes." Ironically, that call made me miss my exit, as Google couldn't talk during the call, and added about 3 minutes to my arrival time lmao.
I did sell the Xbox that he said someone was interested in. I got $40 for it. I spent 27¢ on it. Pretty good return if you ask me.
I couldn't sell it with anything other than a power cord because the controller and AV cables I had been using to play it there were for my personal console. I'm just glad I can actually hook my Xbox up and stop having to drag them to the flea market along with a small library of games.
Not too long after I sold the Xbox, someone came in and asked if I wanted to see some electronics he had in his car. I went out with him. It was a pair of 3ft speakers and a Pioneer audio system with dual cassette decks (although neither of them works) and a 25 Disc CD-changer, as well as the standard AM/FM tuner. Additionally, there was a Fisher amplifier and AM/FM tuner as well as a Fisher Direct Drive turntable. He said he wanted $60 for em, but before that he casually, and probably accidentally, dropped that he was just gonna take em to the thrift store.
Big mistake.
I got em for $35 lmao. THERE GOES MOST OF MY PROFIT.
Oh well.
I tested everything. As I mentioned, the cassette decks don't work, but everything else does apart from the turntable needing a new stylus.
I posted some new photos of the shop to Facebook, and someone soon DMed me about a stereo system.
I priced everything, and it turns out I have about $300 worth of equipment from that deal, the Fisher amp and tuner being worth about $150.
The buyer will hopefully show up next weekend, for he wants to buy the Fisher stuff ($185 with the turntable), the 3ft speakers, an 8-track deck, and a Kenwood deck we've had for a week or two.
The speakers are listed for $50 (and are worth around $100-150), the Kenwood Deck for $50 as well, and the 8-track for $35. That makes it about $320 in equipment. Since he's buying so much, I'll knock it down to $270 and essentially give him the speakers or cassette deck for free lol.
Apart from that stuff, not much happened at the flea market. I sold some records, cassettes, CDs and I think 2 DVDs. One person bought a VHS tape? That money was the other guy's though. Oh well xD.
I can't say that I didn't miss my wonderful partner while on the trip. I actually brought along the stuffed animal they gave me (who's name is Greg) and snuggled with him both nights.
I was very happy to hear from them UwU.
They let me rant and I let them rant.
I honestly give them too much responsibility over me xD. I'm like, "Okay, I'm gonna do this. HOLD ME TO IT."
I know I can't hold myself to anything I personally say (this blog being the only exception apparently), but I listen to them pretty well I think 🤔. If they tell me, "No, you don't need that VCR," so long as it's not some weird specialty thing, like a worldwide VCR 🥵, I'll be like "Yeah, you rite bro."
I love you man xD. You control my craziness pretty well. I'm so thankful for you UwU.
#relationshipgoals
So part way through the flea market day, I went over to Dollar Tree to buy some snack, but ended up looking through the CDs to see if there was anything good. I took photos of about 18 CDs and flipped through them online for the remainder of the flea market day.
I deleted the photos of the ones I didn't want and kept those that I liked. Surprisingly, I ended up buying 13 CDs there, but not before dropping them on the floor like the dumbass I am.
Also, sorry for all the nerd shit I spilled on your lap earlier. No one cares about amps and tuners xD.
I'M LISTENING TO ONE OF THE DOLLAR TREE CDS RIGHT NOW THO.
I already transferred over to my online library on iBroadcast and put the disc into my CD changer, which is now holding 164 CDs.
Its max capacity is 300 discs 🥵
WHY AM I NERD
Oh well
I like being a nerd gurl
Also maybe a technosexual 👀
I get really excited over some electronics. Like. REALLY excited.
Some editing VCRs are like "Holy shit that is SEXY. Look at those goddamn VU meters 🥵. And hhhh there are like 7 inputs on this thing and individual controls for left and right audio gain, not to mention Hi-Fi S-VHS recording. Hhhhhhhhhhh please gimme 😭. Why are you so expensive?"
I uh, mean, uh, *cough* look, pretty lights.
Oh yeah, I was gonna say the album I was listening to xD. MAN I GOT SIDETRACKED.
It's 37 Everywhere by Punchline. Def give it a listen; it's pretty heccin good.
Another notable album I picked up was Page One by Steven Page. I very much like the first track, "A New Shore." It's quite catchy and he has a great voice imo.
Also at dollar tree, I bought a regular bag of Fieras and 2 bags of Fieras Sticks, which were marked down to 75¢/bag because they're expiring soon.
I honestly like the generic Dollar Tree version of Takis more than actual Takis. They're a lot more flavorful when it comes to the lime, but also hotter at the same time.
Don't get the hot nacho ones tho. Hot nacho? More like hot pile of shit.
HAH
Goteem.
They're not that good xD.
THE REGULAR ONES ARE FIRE THO
"How do you do fellow kids?"
I got home and started working on putting the CDs onto my computer, and then onto iBroadcast, but not without first adding The Music Man to my digital library, something I had neglected for a month or two. The CD had just been sitting there lol.
I also switched my digital file for "The Black Parade" to that of the uncensored CD, which I had purchased before I event started working over 2 months ago.
MAN I'M LAZY
I eventually get around to shit tho lol. I guess it's just a matter of priority.
What usually takes priority is digging through everything to find something that I forgot about but then remembered, making a mess in the process that I would then have to clean up, at least partially.
I think the album just ended. I've been writing for a while xD. I'ma start "I Made You Something" by The Island of the Misfit Toys.
I'll tell you where that album came from in a minute.
In the meantime, where was I?
I kinda lost my train of thought despite reading up to see where I was. Oh well. On I go.
I ate dinner and kept working on those CDs, eventually putting my clothes from the week into the washer.
I FORGOT TO PUT MY SHAPING UNDERWEAR IN. FUCKING HELL MAN.
I wanted to wash em for this week 😭
No tight pants for Leonna I guess qwq.
Meanwhile, the box of my CD album cases is overflowing. I need another box.
I keep all of the album artworks in a big CD folder. That's almost full.
I wanna fill my entire CD changer. That's one of my big goals in life. Idk why, but I just wanna legitimately fill the entire thing.
My clothes are in the dryer now. I don't think I have the time (or energy) to fold them tonight. I'll leave that for tomorrow morning before work.
And God. Fucking. Damnit. I start school again on Wednesday. NOT looking forward to that, and neither are my 2 coworkers. We already have low enough staff, but only the two of them working is gonna be a pain in the ass.
I'll still work Saturdays.
I need to contact my guidance counselor to get out of the gym class I signed up for. I scheduled this shit before I found out I was trans, and I don't wanna deal with the fucking locker room situation 🙄 I have far more important matters.
Okay so anyway, the album I'm listening to came from a cassette. I bought this cassette a few months ago at the flea market along with a few others. The reason I bought them? They were all newer cassette releases from the 2010's, and they're all actually pretty good music from very indie bands.
Currently getting mad at iBroadcast's compression algorithm. It's unnaturally fucking anything over -10db up. Oh well, there's not really anything I can do about it.
I have like 13GB of music on my phone btw. That's about 3.5k songs on 268 albums.
I'm kind of an audiophile, but I'm too cheap to pay for a lossless service. Oh well.
They do actually have a lossless service on iBroadcast, but once again, too cheap.
Someone just sent me a friend request who legitimately posted that BLM and the democratic party are hate groups.
BLOCK.
Goodbye ho.
I don't get that. They call the democratic party a hate group when they hate people like me, and I, being more of a democrat although not fully because the 2-party system is fucked, think nothing more of them than they're very wrong about certain things, especially, as shown, that black people, as well as asian, Indian, native, and people of all ethnicities and backgrounds, are not equal to white people.
Yeh.
Totally.
You go buddy.
Anyway, yeah, I can, and do, convert music and video from analog formats to digital files in order for me to archive and listen to whenever and wherever I please. I've actually made a bit of a business out of it, but I don't get too much work from it. At least I'm not overloading myself xD.
I honestly have so much more to say, but I should probably go to sleep soon.
A few final shoutouts to the following people and companies:
-Dollar Tree
-Steven Page
-Broken World Media
-The Island of Misfit Toys
-Simple Kid
-Punchline
-My incredible partner QwQ I love you so much. Thanks for being the best all the time. I hope I can give you the best life ever.
Anyway I suppose this is goodnight. Lmk if you want a full list of the CDs I bought today! I'll link that song by Steven Page here.
And here's a good song from Simple Kid
I really like music lol. Enjoy these pieces.
Anyway, goodnight lol.
Lots of love,
-Leonna.
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d0ntw0rrybehappy · 3 years
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i’m going insane lol
so i feel like the next step in working hard is to not even perceive the work i’m doing as tiring. (rereading this it’s making me lol.) it seems weird that i find a part time job at a restaurant this exhausting? and like i can’t pretend that i’m not tired, but i have to somehow take better care of myself and set the conditions to not be tired from it.
i’ve been thinking about baudrillard/barthes a lot still -- pleasantly surprised that their theories are interesting to apply to any- and everything. for example, they both go into how every statement can also be read as its opposite or negation. so, to quote baudrillard, saying “i am not afraid of communism” also implies that communism is something you should be afraid of.
i’ve been using this as a kind of paranoid way to gain insight into why people tell me that i am “strong” because i don’t really know what that means. (other things i am told i am often: sweet, intense). it’s like what they’re saying is, there’s some kind of context, a milieu of weak people i’m being compared to. or like they want to reassure me that i am strong, because i actually come across as how i feel: like a particularly lost, unstable, emotional, sensitive, and lonely person.
i can’t with restaurant work anymore. it. SUCKS. i want to fucking get out, i am like a rat scrabbling at the walls of a glass aquarium. all novelty has worn off, all misguided overtures of honest work or “people skills.” and i’m still stuck here, still holding my breath in the deep end until i can find the eject button. i am tired, my body aches. my body aches!!
i want to just grind my way out (here we are with barthes again -- well if you truly wanted to do that you’d just shut the fuck up and do it instead of writing about it), but here i am, eating another round of chocolate (i don’t smoke, i don’t have sex, i truly just eat), constantly fucking hungry. then like a bull mowing into a red flag i realize i have been grinding...in a completely useless direction. it is like my passion for learning about things gets scattered every which way and i just can’t start, every path is equally exciting and awful and the injunction to “choose” is not “clicking” in my “head.” it’s like my mind cracked open at some point in my teenage years (when i started smoking weed, when my child universe was decisively fractured by a friend) and now the crack is snowing fireworks and glitter and i shift in and out of unreality. 
reality is almost too painful to bear. nobody’s happy: you can find contentment by accepting your current lot, but “happiness" is really just contrast or relief from pain. it comes in and out. most people are too lazy or small-minded or too busy complaining to feel content, or their lives are just too twiggy, got too long in the wrong direction or are just too fucking hard. i guess i still am happy, and still love life, in a sort of ferocious and bloody and hungry way. 
love is bleak, though. i barely even know how to define it anymore. (culture defines a love which we yearn for; we experience “love” insofar as our real love fleetingly resembles this model, only to come up short -- baudrillard). re: love, to use my mom’s favorite school-of-hard-knocks memory device for the laws of thermodynamics -- a subject she took? -- you can’t win, you can’t break even, you can’t get outta the game (and death and taxes). you are going to get royally FUCKED by love just like everybody else, and you are STILL gonna play, you beautiful mortal fool. like the tarot cards lauren dealt me, putting away the three cards she’d used to describe my near future and then flipping through the entire deck, picture side up, without realizing that i was quietly watching it describe my whole entire life -- clinging at the edge of my seat to see some eventual combination that spelled good, strong, lasting love and seeing only struggle, happiness, struggle, pain, struggle, and finally ending, at my death, in a small statue made of gold. 
see also, other realities i hate to swallow: nearly all interpersonal problems are insurmountable and better left undealt with, and work basically sucks unless you are very lucky and very smart. 
work. let’s go back to that. i used to think my work would be respected off its merit; now i see the merit in literally fucking my way up. i wonder if i should even be an artist at all. artists are kinda like showponies or whores; they’re not actually important. the more honest and wonderful they are, the less important they probably are, like schoolteachers. they have an impact on an individual level. but on a societal level, you have no control as an artist. you just get played by bigger fish. better to find a way to have your hands on the gears; that way you have a shot at making a higher-order change to society. but alas, the (capitalist) system is totally out of everyone’s hands and will keep running as usual no matter what you do, still savage in equal amounts, i think. doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try. but at this point i’d give a toe or finger to work for someplace like youtube. at least it’s reached critical mass where i could do something cool and make a difference with emerging media. 
that or i pander to whatever blathering brain-melting slop, drivel, they’re putting on tv for kids and adults. or manage to convince a smaller nonprofit that i am “good at talking to people from diverse socioeconomic backgrounds,” whatever the hell that fucking means. or maybe, ugh god, i’ll work for an ad agency? or do digital strategy? and um, i could say some shit about how capitalism is darwinism and money is a form of social control that works so well because it’s out of the hands of any individual person, and i should probably just stick with art and believe in it, and maybe like, apply for grants. but i want a job, a full-time job. i want stability and enough money that i don't feel guilty buying new underwear and i don't want to hustle to keep the tap running month-to-month and i want to spend the majority of my time doing something i find fulfilling. and soon enough i'll get that, and all my dreams will come true: i’m going to get married and become a fat mom taking my kids to piano practice and saying “the meeting went on forever today,” and i’ll have a husband who never cleans the house enough, and then we’ll get divorced and he’ll find someone 20 years younger and i’ll live out the rest of my years semi-happily alone and i don’t know how i will ever have time to make art again. or if i do i just hope it’s not hobby-like, second-rate.
i wish i could have (feel) the bare-faced honesty and love of sha’carri richardson hugging her grandmother after she worked her ass off for a race. instead everything is this weird simulation where i never feel like i love anybody enough or like i’m working hard enough. i can’t speak honestly except when i am writing about myself (strong, sweet, intense, narcissistic) or things i have noticed, as directed to my own imaginary friend. when i try to communicate irl (or, worst of all, “be real”) it’s all so overthought, overwrought, self-conscious. the only person who knows my real private self is the girl winking at me on my black lives matter poster. i hope she doesn’t mind being here in my room. ducky, the stuffed animal brandon gave me, was also supportive but i put him away because it seemed bad to tell future guys that my stuffed animal is “the child of divorce.” and now /you guys/ know me a little bit, because i took the time to pretend you were all my imaginary friend, my dearest pen pal who laughs at all my jokes and gets all my references, and stopped pretending i was anything besides what’s written here. 
and i think, like, a lot of people now live in this weird simulation? and are so confused about romantic and familial love to the point where everyone is getting off on family members fucking each other and can’t decide if it’s normal to think kids are hot? but i guess that was always some weird fucked-up demon side of human existence? another thing i’m supposed to accept. (also sorry trigger warning.) and another thing i took for granted as a child, that most people, if not everyone, is weird/gross/evil, but now that my mind is cracked this shocks me all over again and i seek some sort of explanation. it’s like i can’t find a real hunk of closeness anywhere. i’m close to my own family, but in my other relationships we’re either too distant or too close and i’m desperately searching for just some normal friends. and to be able to give a speech where i tell someone i really love them and for it to ring true. but i try to be grateful that i live in driving distance to the beach and there’s air conditioning and once i stop being a stupid baby there’s probably more friends and work and stuff out there for me. and then i’ll have some new problem.
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ba-mi-soro-orisha · 4 years
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when youre done recovering id love to hear your thoughts on the book(even if the post ends up being almost as long lmao)
Buckle up, y’all, cause this is going DEEP INTO SPOILERS. This is my no-holds-barred take on Children of Virtue and Vengeance!
SPOILER WARNING
SPOILER WARNING
SPOILER WARNING
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If you read any further past this, CoVaV is gonna be majorly spoiled for you. This is your last warning.
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Okay, I gotta open with a minor - but really the only - critique I had about CVV: we know Tomi was rushed in finishing the book in time for the third pushed back date, and the book kinda reads like it. Book 1, I felt like we got a lot more detail and getting to know characters and buildup of the plot. Book 2, it felt like we were just rushing to get through all the action planned. There wasn’t very much in between downtime, which resulted in not only a kinda rushed book with way more plot than pages, but also a very emotionally devastating book. 
Which leads me to: I feel like the central theme of CoBaB was more “hope”, while in CoVaV it was straight up “conflict”. And there was no recovery time. Even the precious few hopeful times that were in the book, I didn’t really have time to process or chill or cope. I always knew something worse was coming, which is what made this such a raw read. I do think the book could have benefited from giving us a little more hope. Like three-quarters of the way through, I had to keep thinking back to CBB and how I felt reading it and hoping there would be more hopeful and optimistic feelings in book 3. I couldn’t put the book down, but as a result, I pretty much just sobbed through the last fourth (at least) of the book, finished the book, sat in shock, and then went to bed. This book literally exhausted me. What a godsdamned ride.
I completely get why the book was like this, even if it wasn’t as a result of being rushed, but I feel a little more for the readers to balance it out helps us survive, lol.
That aside, there was SO MUCH in this book, I have SO MANY feelings!!!
Firstly, the worldbuilding was GREAT. I loved the new insight we got on magic. I totally didn’t realize frm book 1 that tîtans and maji were different and used magic differently for the most part.
With the direction of the ending, I’m not sure Tomi will go in this direction, but I’d like to know more about these differences. Why is it that chants can work for tîtans but maji can only use magic through chants? Is it just most effective? Will we discover they can use raw magic in book 3? I HAVE QUESTIONS.
Learning about the maji clan setups was also really interesting, but I have to admit it threw me for a bit of a loop referring to the leaders as elders and then they were all children. xP
Also, I’m really glad Tomi listened and gave us queer characters. I love Nâo and Khani. Powerful leader girlfriends? HELL YEAH.
I think this book made it really clear that Zélie x Amari is not end game and will not happen. I know a lot of people were/still are hopeful for that, but I think there’s just too much set up that says otherwise. They love each other, but imo they firmly think of each other as family. I’m going to put my stock in our canon queer couple and support them 10,000%.
Next big one: FUCKING HELL INAN STILL BEING ALIVE, I AM REALLY NOT HAPPY. I didn’t check out the chapters in the table of contents, so I didn’t have the forewaring to see that Inan was getting perspective chapters again, so it took my by quite a bit of surprise. A lot of you called that Inan would still be alive, but I honestly so prefer “dead means dead” in stories (otherwise, I find deaths are used too much for shock value and it just devalues the overall story and plot) that I had myself convinced he really was dead. He got a convincing death scene. Listen, if you kill off a character, I am going to grieve them. It is not going to be the same if you bring them back. I will have completely detached feelings for them and have to form a whole new relationship and perspective on them, and I am always going to keep them at a distanced because they were dead, I saw it happen, and there is no going back.
But no. BAM! He’s not only alive but Zélie is the one to wake him from his connector coma. Not happy. I really feel that Inan’s story played out in CoBaB. It’s interesting that I’ve seen some real anti-Inan folk feeling more sympathy for Inan in this book, while I’ve talked about feeling that Inan was a really compelling villain in book 1, but I’ve got much more negative feelings towards him throughout book 2.  (And also why the hell should Inan get to come back but all these little maji kids - Zulaikha and Mazeli, c’mon - die and die for real??? It feels very cheap and very shock value to me. I don’t know if it was like some statement on privilege or Tomi just didn’t want to be done with Inan, but yeah.)
Honestly, the way Inan and Amari think in this book is so similar, and I found it so fucking conceited and narrow-minded. My view on both of them went down in this book. They just kept talking about how they have to be so selfish and they’re the only ones who can see things for how they are and how damn much they sacrifice and how tired they are because it’s up to them to sacrifice everything. Like!!! GUYS. No.
From the beginning when the CVV summary was released, I was wary of the plot focusing on Amari leading the people. It’s one of those things like: the system is not broken. It’s functioning exactly as it intends to. The monarchy has evolved to uphold a class system where diviners and maji are at the bottom. That’s what it wants to be doing. Can you really effectively change the system by accepting the system as your basis for change? Maybe it’s time to deconstruct the system and build something better. Not just put a royal back on the throne and think that’s gonna go smoothly.
And that’s exactly what happened here. They tried to use the system to buck the system and everything collapsed around them.
But I’m getting a little off topic - fixing a system of bigotry and oppression that your people built is not a sacrifice. You are still in the position of power here.
And Inan’s little bit where he thinks he’s so good and pure and better than his father because he offers the maji a place in society if they bend to his rules and follow him when the other option is that he will murder them had me wanting to tear my hair out. “Follow me or perish” is not a compromise. It’s not improvement. It’s literally a threat. And then when the maji don’t take this offer, Inan takes this as a sign that his mother was right and they can’t trust the maji to make the right decisions!?!?
Ugh. I was just done. I know all the factors of why I originally had sympathy for Inan are still there, and they largely control how he acts and thinks in CVV. (What he really needs for character growth and development is to be away from toxic influences and given time to grieve and work on figuring himself out. Not thrust into a position of power with his mother holding all the strings.) So, for me, Inan’s character really hit a wall, always getting stuck in the same patterns. And so now I feel less sympathy for him and find his story less compelling.
I honestly found Inan’s cousin, Ojore, really interesting. I think it could have been a really compelling story if somehow Ojore was allowed to take up the throne. WIth his background, being there in the burner attack that killed Saran’s father, he had a lot of backstory that we could have explored. And Tomi still could have revealed that it was Nehanda that manipulated things and let the burners in to encourage the war and the genocide against maji. Without Inan, we could have really gotten to explore how Ojore would react to that while on the throne. He could have potentially gone through the character development that Inan will never really get to see. Instead of him being killed pretty much immediately after he learns the truth behind his family’s death and the attack on him.
That being said, I do respect Inan’s decision to give up his position in the end. I think the whole “I’ll let your murder me” and Zélie apparently going to go through this was a little… contrived. But at least Inan did pull it out in the end. It will be interesting to see how these last moments between Inan and Zélie come into play in the next book. I’m assuming either Inan has been taken with the rest or will mount a rescue to go after them, so you know we’re going to get more on how this relationship develops. 
(I think with Tzain done with Amari right now, Amari and Inan trying to navigate a new siblingship with each other will be a more interesting relationship than Inan x Zélie, and I would look forward to getting to see these sibs talk and get to actually be there for each other like they never have before.)
And since I just went through Inan, let’s go ahead and talk about Amari.
Oh, Amari.
Amari, Amari, Amari.
GIRL. Why did it take you this entire book to realize that making decisions based off of what your father would have done was the wrong damn thing to do!?!?!? Omg, we all knew that was gonna crash and burn on you. The entire purpose of overthrowing your father’s rule was to not do things his way because his way was cruel and malicious. smdh
I was still rooting for Amari throughout the book. I am still rooting for Amari, but damn. She sure did try to make it hard doing things like going back on promises right after she made them (forcing Zélie to teach her chants that didn’t belong to her and then immediately using them on a maji) and acting like she new better than all the maji (I agree that just wanting to kill all the nobles and other peoples wasn’t a feasible plan, but GIRL. These are a traumatized, hunted people. They’re going to be angry, especially right in the thick of a war. Strongarming your way into a position of power over them is not going to make them feel any better about you or bring about peace. It’s just going to show them that they cannot trust you). And her move at the end? Sacrificing Zélie and all those people in that village? Being willing to murder them all? … If killing her father fucked her up, what’s this going to do? I still have faith in her. I want her to come back from this. But she’s going to have to majorly confront her own feelings and actions and work very hard to come back from this. Though, I have a feeling that she’ll mostly get forgiven in the next book because bigger and worse things will happen and they’ll have to come together, regardless of how they feel about each other.
Amari’s realization in the end when she decides she doesn’t have to kill her mother (uh… was I the only one expecting some sort of Avatar moment like when Aang took away Ozai’s bending? Like… Nehanda is still a threat… this part of the story can’t just be over) and that killing her father just fucked her up kinda made me feel ashamed for feeling so proud of her when she did kill Saran in CBB. Like, it was just such a powerful moment, and I think too many (simple “good vs evil”) stories fall prey to poor and simplistic messages like “killing in self-defense is evil and makes the good people as bad as the villains”. But it’s just been weighing on Amari this whole time and fucking her up, and now I feel bad. =(
Speaking of Amari feeling bad, though: Ramaya. The connector Amari beat for connector elder.
I hope either Inan was taken with everybody else or Amari will connect with him via their connector-sibling connection. It seems incredibly likely that Ramaya is stuck in her dreamscape similarly to how Inan was stuck in his before Zélie somehow entered it and woke him. Considering they were constantly saying Ramaya was their best soldier, it seems like it would also come in handy to wake Ramaya and be able to utilize her skills to help rescue the kidnapped crew. Like, this HAS to come up at some point, doesn’t it? She can’t just be forgotten in a coma. Did anybody stay behind to take care of her when they marched on the capitol? D|
Other relationships!
Fuck, I fell so hard for Roën in this book. He’s just so endearing. And it seems like it was really only Roën that was able to keep Zélie grounded and moving forward in this book. I didn’t really support Roën and Zélie getting together in book 1, but book 2 absolutely made me support the ship.
However, I think Roën’s actions at the end of the book are a very good insight into the types of things that Roën is capable of. I don’t know if this is endgame for Tomi, but after Zélie’s constant struggle of just wanting to leave and be free and start over in this book and how her rage towards Inan consumed her and caused her to make some short-sighted mistakes (promising she’d protect Mazeli at the temple, then Ojore almost killing him while she tussled with Inan), I just don’t know that this is a particularly healthy relationship. The bit where Roën takes her out to see and they get a ride from a whale? Absolutely adorable. Just what Zélie (and I suspect Roën) needed. But long-term? I have a feeling that Roën is going to have to let more of that mercenary self of his out, and it’s going to scare and wear on Zélie, and erode their relationship. I think this is one of those relationships that is good in the short-term but isn’t long-term sustainable.
Speaking of long-term - I know Tzain is absolutely done with Amari right now, but I think he’s overall shown a great capacity for forgiveness, and I do think Tzain and Amari are endgame for Tomi. I don’t think this break between them is permanent. 
But you know who we really need to talk about?
MAMA AGBA
What a heartbreaking arc. You know she had to sever the tie between Mazeli and Zélie to save Zélie’s life. I so wish she had gotten more time with Zélie for them to reform their trust and love for one another. I absolutely wouldn’t have been able to survive the maji elders sacrificing Amari to complete the linking ritual, but I can’t believe they really did sacrifice Mama Agba like that. She was really the only guidance these poor kids had. I can’t believe they really sacrificed her.
RIP Mama Agba. I hope you’re helping to look after Mazeli. 3
Now, for that damn epilogue.
I don’t know if I can take the next book. I don’t know how Tomi’s gonna make it through the next book.
Getting gassed and waking up on an eerie ship with the other elders? Anybody else get the feeling that Tomi is going to dive into a trans atlantic slave trade parallel? I hope I’m just being paranoid here (hey, the book seriously played with my emotions; I have no idea where I’m at anymore). What were y’alls takeaways from that part?
Predictions!
- Harum obviously has something to do with all the elders being taken and them being on a boat now, right? Tomi was totally setting him up as an antagonist and he got very little antag action in this book. He’s got to have something to do with this.
- This was always intended to be a trilogy, but I have to wonder if this isn’t going to end up turning into a couple more books than intended. There was so much to go over in book 2 and then the twist of an epilogue. They’re not even getting to rebuild yet. It just feels like Tomi has so much more planned it can’t possibly be wrapped up in just one more book.
- I feel like something’s gotta happen to sever or dampen the connection the elders (and Roën and Tzain) have with each other. After how powerful they were in the end, Tomi’s gotta counter that somehow. I just don’t know if she’s gonna dampen the powers or pull out an even BIGGER bad than Nehanda was.
- Obviously “Children of Gods” has to do with the title of book 3. If it’s not just Children of Gods, I predict: Children of Gods and Ghosts.
Ending Thoughts
CVV was well worth the wait and lived up to the hype, but if we don’t get some hope and optimism in the next book, I don’t know what I’m going to do. I need these poor kids to get some semblance of a happy ending. They’ve been through so much.
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sofhyuck · 4 years
Text
Artifacts from District 9 Unlock
I cried for the first ten minutes lol
I literally just got out and I’m still in shock I actually just saw them live??? so pls bear with me
Also my korean is very mediocre so there’s a lot I didn’t understand
All of their video production is incredible like holy shit????
They literally never lost a single ounce of energy their stage presence is incredible
Dahyun, tzuyu(?), youngk, wonpil, and I think two other day6 members were there (I couldn’t see them very well)
My seats were far away but I could still tell how beautiful they all are
Most of woojin’s parts seem to be jisung’s now but all of his high ad libs have been removed
During the first break they talked about the weapons they had in the intro video (again can’t stress enough how amazing the quality of those videos were)
Lots of bats, Felix had a hockey stick, someone had a giant hammer and there was a crowbar (?)
They did a piano ver of I am YOU (kinda missed the original but damn it was beautiful)
The Intro to Miroh was so good like choreo on point also Chan literally jumped over IN or minho(again couldn’t really tell) whole they were fully stood up like damn mans really is a kangaroo
Also Miroh live in general hits sooooo differently like there’s a reason it’s my favorite
During the second break they gave spoilers for the new album
IN literally just said autumn and we were all ????
Seungmin sang a bit and changbin rapped and Chan got mad at how much they spoiled he pulled them off stage lolll
Minho first stuttered over what he was saying (so cute) and then a dance move but literally none of the other members knew what he was doing rip
Felix was singing some chant (I already forget what it was) and they jokingly called it a halloween song
There were like small groups performances tbh didn’t really know any of them but they were all really good so I’m gonna try and find them (the universe??? We go and then dance line did a straight bop that I can’t remember lol...)
Before double knot changbin told everyone to tie their shoes lmaooo
Double knot also fucking slapped
This is an aside but a bunch of people literally got dragged out for taking pictures w cameras
There was a video at the end before the ments from Stays and this is when I started crying again
Changbin and Hyunjin cried the most after the video (we’ll get back to Hyunjin soon bc wow does that boy cry)
They couldn’t say anything for a while bc they were choked up but eventually Chan did his ment but he was choking up the whole time
IN was fine but then it planned to him during Minho’s speech and the kid was on the floor holy shit
Ok now Hyunjin he started sobbing halfway through his ment but he kept trying to speak and honestly it was a lil funny we all laughed (but also I 100% relate to him that is me water sign gang gang)
We just kind of all cried a lot for a good half an hour
Also people were still getting caught with cameras during all this it was crazy
After the ments they took pictures w the audience but deadass my seats were so bad I wasn’t even in it lmaoooo
They ended w yayaya and it was v sad but happy???
Overall they’re seriously incredible live like I said earlier they literally never got tired they kept pretty much the same level of energy the whole show 10/10
Also props to the background dancers plus production crew, I see y’all keep doing what you’re doing
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bisexualterror · 4 years
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noor: i'm very curious, very interested, bc like i haven't started the series it's on my to-see list 👀 and what little i read was hargreeves oc's who got paired with a sibling and that kinda weirded me out of watching it yet 😬 absorbs light hmm she's her own lil sun? her siblings lil sun? 🥺
nova: i love her, gimme more witches stories on the tvd verse khsjdjfb i can't wait to see her when the plot really starts to kick in, another win for the bennett coven who the actual series didn't seem to give a sh*t about 😤 and i saw an ask about sheila living i could cry hhhHHhHh all the adults dying, someone give this kids therapy 😶
marsilia: i lover her already, it's the first time i see a zabini oc, pls spare more mars lore 🤲 ksjsjdjf also love the nickname, mars, it's cute 💖 we also get to see more about blaise as character too! ALSO you know that whole can't remember if it was canon or fanon blaise's mom being a "black widow" or a this totally fanon mafia donna so yes can't wait to see this zabini family 😌 aAnNdD oh. my. stars. my brain just caught up she's gonna be same year with astoria, luna and ginny KSHDJSKDHD
altheia: omg 🥺🥺🥺 a doctor who oc 💖 who isn't linked with the doctor from the beginning kaksksldj like i love him but give me more oc's with their own backgrounds who don't immediately drop everything to be with him and stuff pls & tenk u 😔 lsjhskfif i thot u were gonna say theia IS missy's childe omg who is she? are her family or/and the master's important to be arranging marriages to each other? or will that be just a gallifreyan thing? what happens to her when looking into the untempered schism? how does she fare during the war? will she live to be around during the new who timeline orrrr?? ajlajshdofn sorry it's just omg 😭
OOOok sdndskjd so
noor: that’s vv fair, it’s probably because of the whole allison and luther sibling thing is canon in the show, they don’t do anything really romantic imo, it doesn’t go anywhere and honestly it seems like they just latched onto each other platonically as kids and might have misinterpreted as romantic cause they were isolated from other kids and didn’t have anyone other than each other n their other siblings??? anyway that’s how i watched it, but i 100% understand why it would put you off. but still i love these chaotic siblings svm and YES omg her siblings sun 😭😭
nova: mood, it’s part of why i created her, i love witches so much :D also ME TOO, i wanna write season three so BADly, i have so many plans for her you’re hopefully gonna love. and yeah, honestly i could rant on the injustice they gave the bennett coven but the one i hated the most was that most of them were used by other people and to further the plot and then died 😔 ND tell me about it!! we never saw bonnie’s home life but we can all take a guess and say that grams was the one who was there for her and ELENA LOST TWO SETS OF PARENTS AND THEN ALARIC FOR A BIT.  they need milk, cookies and therapy. (but also like bitch, me too tf)
marsilia: 
djsjkjlkds ok so the main reason why i created marsilia was because i wanted to write more on blaise’s mom but lol i just had to make an oc too. there was def rumors in canon i THink of her killing all of her husbands cause they kept dying without any explanation and i wanna have fun with that, so yeah, thats gonna be fun :D also YES, i honestly just wanted to not have to rewrite every book/movie so i had her a year younger than blaise lisjlksjs but yes, she’s gonna be friends with both greengrass sisters, luna and eventually ginny (though she has a rocky start with everyone but luna XD)
altheia:  i love him too, A LOt, like so much, but yeah.....i prefer to know who my ocs are outside of their SO, esp with characters like the doctor, who can kinda be all encompassing. kjhkjdhkhsd thats what i thought it was gonna sound like after i wrote it LMAO but ye theia stays on gallifrey with her daughter when the master and the doctor leave. (damn did i just give ANOther oc my abandonment issues??)
just for a few decades so her daughter, cosima, can finish her education and then al says peace out, leaves in the dead of night to steal a tardis and travels with her daughter on her own for a few more decades that will probably pass by in like two chapters.
cosima is an odd mix of her parents, very intelligent and sweet but also super scary when angry skljslakjaslk their families are kind of important, at least they think so, but also it’s just a thing i wrote that’s normal for gallifrey.
ok so it’s kind in the WORks cause i need to figure out the side affects and the HOW part but when baby altheia looks into the schism, an alternate older version of herself, fresh from war, gets dragged into her conscience. IWONDEr WHO IT Was THAT DID THat? (it was the time lords, breaking their rules so they could groom altheia to help them in the war)
she has.... a rough time in the war, looses pretty much all of her family (cosima is ok though!!), might bring her brother abacus back cause i... can’t bare to kill him off permanently...  she WILL before around new who, i haven’t finished watching the classics so this is how i have her arks planned out:
first i’m gonna focus on gallifrey era for maybe 25 chapters and then i’m going to do like maybe four adventures of her with her daughter spanning those decades, the war i’m going to skip completely other then how she gets out of it, and then she’ll... be alone for half a chapter before reuniting with the ninth doctor (he thinks she’s dead... ) and from there i’ll probably just write her into the episodes i want, skipping some that i don’t want to rewrite, and stop whenever i get tired i guess (i do have an end in mind i just don’t know which season it’s gonna be in) cause i doubt this show is ever gonna end lsjalkLMAO
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loseyoutoloveme · 4 years
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rare first impressions review
a “first impressions” review instead of a straight up review since my opinions will def change over time
RARE:
i’ve been listening to the demo for over a year and it’s so cool to see how different it sounds w her voice
“burning toast in the toaster” is such an offbeat lyric. almost jarring in its banality, i love it
the glo up from revival to this....... going from wondering “maybe i should be more like her” in perfect to shouting “i’m not gonna beg for you, i’m not gonna let you make me cry, not getting enough from you, didn’t you know i’m hard to find?” we love a liberated queen so much
this is super fun and great but i played the shit out of the demo in 2018 which makes it feel a lil less exciting. i should have waited rip. still love it tho.
9/10
DANCE AGAIN:
“confidence is throwing your heart through every brick wall”
this is so different?????? love to see experimentation, not my fav sound she’s ever tried out i don’t think, but i do like it, v fun
“all the trauma’s in remission” (trauma or drama????? idk)
sounds very starboy inspired at times, at least abelena gave us this
“vulnerable ain’t easy, believe me, but i go there”
actually, almost a return to stars dance at moments???? in a way more mature, fully realized way... which is so cool when the whole theme of the album and its imagery seems to be looking back at your past self and celebrating yourself for overcoming so much, and also, like she said taylor told her, reclaiming the happiness that has been taken from you and letting yourself return to a happier version of yourself, the truest version of yourself that wasn’t being pulled down and abused. like stars dance was her big dance edm record and i know it’s not a celebrated work of hers lol but there is so much beauty in making a song that says “feels so good to dance again” and going back to that sound for 1 song, remembering what it’s like to feel light, to just dance.
(adding this after my second listen: WAY better with a second listen)
7.5/10
LOOK AT HER NOW:
a forever bop
we love her
“of course she was sad but now she’s glad, she dodged a bullet, took a few years to soak up the tears but look at her now watch her go”
8.5/10
LOSE YOU TO LOVE ME:
yes yes yes yes yes yes
we stan forever
“this dancing was killing me softly, i needed to hate you to love me”
absolutely the rawest, most vulnerable track in her discography, which is saying a lot
“in 2 months you replaced us like it was easy, made me think i deserved it in the thick of healing”
i think what i love so much about this era, about the things that she’s saying in interviews, about the messages she’s sharing in these lyrics so far, is like... not apologizing to her abuser, not making excuses for him, not letting his actions destroy her confidence. comparing the lyrics of revival to this, it’s so clear that there’s been such a change in mentality, such a maturing process, that revival was very much still in the midst of it all and that it’s finally over now. no “i’ll always have love for him,” no “everything happens for a reason,” no “i miss you,” no “what did i do wrong?” there is SO much strength in saying “actually, you know what i really didn’t deserve that and i do not love you anymore and losing you is the best thing that ever happened to me” and simply leaving it at that. forgiveness and love is NOT always essential to moving on!! sometimes that chronic forgiveness is just detrimental and the best thing u can do for yourself is say “FUCK YOU” and leave.
10/10
RING:
“i’m one in a billion baby, don’t you agree?”
this sounds SOOOOOOOOOOOO FUCKING GOOOOOOODDDDDD
nothing else to say like...... period....... 
100000/10
VULNERABLE:
“wrap your arms around my weakness”
this is not at all what i expected and is so good
saw everyone saying this is delicate’s sister and it’s so true
the strength and beauty in being completely devastated by a person and still being like... i won’t let it make me cold....... :(
9/10
PEOPLE YOU KNOW:
now this is camouflage’s sister. i love that nostalgia is at the core of so many of selena’s songs like wow she’s truly a cancer huh...... the pain of growing up and becoming a different person and knowing you need to let go of a person that you experienced so much with in such formative years but letting go of them feels like not only letting go of the good memories but letting go of the self that you were when they loved you, when things were good...... ugh
“i never know when enough is enough” hit me right in the heart
this sounds so good... incorporating the edm sound that she experimented with in the droplets but not going all the way there, just kind of letting it exist in that in between....... love
10/10
LET ME GET ME:
“me and this spiral are done, burn this camouflage i’ve been wearing for months, tryna let a little happy in for once” BEAUTIFUL
“take that tired heart and go and turn it inside out” wow.....
this is so sexy and empowering
noticing ur tendency to self-sabotage and overthink and be toxic towards urself..... when ur so used to toxicity and pain that u forget what it’s like to live without it...... but then breaking that pattern and letting urself just LIVE for a moment......
i’m still thinking about “me and this spiral are done, burn this camouflage i’ve been wearing for months” like wtfffffff 
it’s like a self-aware, realistic me & my girls lol 
i didn’t expect to like this one tbh bc it kinda faded into the background of the tracklist and i forgot it existed, but she snapped
9/10
CROWDED ROOM:
her voice sounds so cute and suits this sound so well
“yeah i was afraid but you made it safe, i guess that is our combination, said you feel lost, well so do i” SOFFFFTTTTT.... TENDERRRRRR
again, honestly didn’t expect to totally love this one but I LOVE THIS ONE!!!!!!
“the world keeps on spinning but i ain’t dizzy yet”
this 6lack feature fits well and is a great addition, his voice really suits the song
1000/10
KINDA CRAZY:
an original sg2 track we stan
“but slowly all the sugar, it went to waste” :(
say my name vibes in the chorus lyrics. love!
“you’ve been lyin just for fun, luckily no damage done” LOVE!
“now you’re treatin me like i’m insane... YOU’RE insane!” SNAPPPPPEDDDDD OMG..... YESSSS BITCHHHH
oh my god the snippet that we’ve been listening to for 3 years lol
this is...... STELLARRRRRR BITCH!!!!!
10/10
FUN:
“my kind of trouble likes your trouble too”
the sigh before the chorus!!!! 
I LOVEEEE THIS
“you get me higher than my medication” we-
this is rare’s hands to myself tbh
this chorus is so good 
9.5/10
CUT YOU OFF:
i was most excited for this one!!! based off the snippets she shared in the trailer
“gotta chop chop all the extra weight, been carrying you for fourteen hundred sixty days, gotta gotta gotta clean my slate” OOOOOOOF
“HOW COULD I CONFUSE THAT SHIT FOR LOVE” AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
this chorus is EXACTLY my vibe tbh this song was made for me lmao
“i imagine all the endless places i could know with a drop drop and i’ll let you go, all the possibilities i got from head to toe, yeah they’d yeah they’d yeah they’d start to show” WHEW BITCH!!!!!!! realizing this dead fucking weight is holding you down... realizing you will be FREE you will be GOOD you will be HAPPY without him. the way that dropping him will be liberating and will open up the whole world for you!!! AHHH! LOVE YOURSELF FIRST!!!!
this guitar solo, ABSOLUTE chef’s kiss! selena GETS me!
10000000/10 YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES
A SWEETER PLACE:
“red lips french kiss my worries all away” ummmmmmm *billy eichner voice* GO LESBIANS LET’S GO HERE WE GO LESBIANS HERE WE GO LESBIANS COME ON
“felt what real is like” 🥺
“I CAN’T BELIEVE I CAN BE LOUD, HOLDING HANDS WITH THE DARKNESS AND KNOWING MY HEART IS ALLOWED” THE BEST LYRIC IN HER DISCOGRAPHY THIS IS BEAUTIFUL
tbh i don’t really love the chorus except for the “oo-oo-oo-oo” part at the end but it works with the song and is something i’ll love with time
kid cudi’s verse really adds to the song, i’m glad the features are used to add to the song rather than just being thrown in out of nowhere
8.5/10
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ofkenneths · 4 years
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OKAY so i actually have some info on my dumbfuck boy ken, so i’m way more prepared for this intro in comparison to the absolute serving of dust i gave y’all with winona... yikes. anyways ! once again feel free to lms for plots or w/e cos im open to anything and everything ~
ken’s pinterest: here !
content warnings: alcoholism, death, headassery
holy crap, is that THOMAS DOHERTY over there ? nevermind, it must be KENNETH FRASER, that COMMENTARY & COMEDY youtuber. isn’t it crazy that they’re TWENTY-FIVE and already have 3m subscribers? i heard that they’re known to be DETACHED, but also pretty MAGNETIC, just like a typical SCORPIO. ( lazy smiles hidden behind the glint of a silver flask, outlandish stories that you’re never sure are true or not & the longest day of the year )
OK so ! a little disclaimer first: i don’t know SHIT about scotland / scottish accents beyond what i’ve seen in outlander ok ! i really just be faking it til i make it so ! @ me if u want ~
moving on.. im gonna go off my previous setup and start with his personality cos lbr that’s what y’all really care abt ~ he’s a little shit ! a gd moron ! really goes out of his way to be obnoxious & charming UGH id like to strangle him.. think joey tribbiani mixed with cody ko… but with a horrendously unintelligible scottish accent (: he really be like that All The Time smh
not the smartest ?? your boy actually graduated from harvard with honors and yet ?? yeah he’s a little dumb but it’s chill cos he’s p much got .. no sense of embarrassment ? cannot recall a single moment of his life when he felt embarrassed or regretted doing/saying something so .. catch him making self-depreciating jokes on the daily. on the flip side tho .. if someone was gonna like constantly get on him abt it he might 100% get in his feelings and uhhh when he do.. that’s when fists start flying ? most cos he’s always on his way to a blackout binge ;)
on top of that he also has .. little to no sense of self-preservation .. will p much do absolutely anything even if it’s detrimental to his physical, mental or emotional health ! love that for him ! Makes Bad Choices, essentially ( makes rash & not-thought-out choices ). never says no to a dare, p much always dtf cos lbr his libido is .. out of control and i hate him ??? & ALWAYS willing to break a rule or twelve
& now for the fun part … he’s a functioning alcoholic ! Big Time ! at his happiest when intoxicated and will p much always have alcohol on him somehow ? he’s usually got a flask plus a buzz throughout the day sighs so smh ! honest to god he probably can’t remember the last time he was completely sober so uhhh that’s fun ig ?? the big thing is that it’s been going on for so long that his tolerance is so high he keeps needing more and more to stay buzzed .. so it’ll likely eventually … start to cause some real problems ……. would be wild if his subscribers found out *wink wink*
a phat hypocrite tho ! love it ! will literally get annoyed with people who lie and play games when thats .. all he do .. god he’s actually the spawn of the devil i want him dead
SHEW OK onto a little background ! grew up in edinburgh ( obvs, sighs ) with his parents who were both school teachers so his upbringing was p modest ?? p normal ??? honestly .. his life was super normal til he was twelve & his parents died in a hit & run when they were crossing the street :/ from then he had to live with his uncle who was … uhhh.. a Garbage Human Being lmao ! Basic rich businessman on his bullshit .. thinking he’s the absolute god of gods reincarnate.. manipulating women .. talking down to ken .. treating everyone like he was better than them .. yeah, just a general piece of shit tbh. definitely not happy to have a preteen suddenly in his charge so ken was like .. Fine ? i’ll do whatever the fuck i want then ? & basically … did everything he knew he shouldnt have done lol
the only thing he really stayed on top of was his grades in school cos it was his best chance of getting the absolute fuck away from his uncle for good and doing it without having to rely on the bastard’s money/connections blah blah whatever so even as he was acting like a fuckin’ fool, he was getting straight a’s & p much being on a first name basis with all his teachers BJOVN we love duality
it was all fun and reckless until he had a real brush with death when he was seventeen. he was fooling around with his buddies, drunk right off his ass, acting like a piece of shit & making a complete ass of himself when he found himself underneath the motorcycle he was driving so.. he ended up spending a good amount of time in the hospital & came out of it with a nasty scar through his left brow & three shattered fingers that wouldn’t ever heal properly ( he’s left handed but had to relearn how to write and do everything with his right hand after it all ).
after that he decided to get the hell out of dodge ( .. scotland ) and move to the states & honestly thank the lord he got accepted into harvard cos otherwise he’d have had to choose between cambridge and oxford, neither far enough away from his uncle & his past as he wanted to be so ((: my mans lucky ig !
in college he got rly close with the guys in his dorm + rushed a fraternity ( a BUSINESS one, not a fun one so he was not up in there partying and hazing poor, unsuspecting scholarship kids ) & that’s when he rly started to feel content with his life ?? all it took was a move to a foreign country and the power of brotherhood *rock n roll emoji* and yk.. booze !
anyways ~ he started his channel in college as a way to let out the absolute dumbass in himself in a constructive way that didn’t involve getting into fights or doing hard drugs lol it started out as a sort of vlog channel until he got tired of carrying a camera around all day and it just kinda naturally progressed into a commentary & comedy channel as he found sitting in front of a camera and talking absolute nonsense about other nonsense was kinda like his calling, even if he has to write a transcript for subtitles cos everyone complains abt not being able to understand him.. it’s fine don’t worry about it
he’s uhh p much having the time of his life, tho he uhh Does miss home something fierce ( but no worries he just drowns all that shit out with some aged whisky lol ! ) & lowkey wishes he didnt have to continuously drink himself into a stupor to get thru the day but here we are ;)
anyways im super tired of this intro lmao so just mssg me if u want any specific details ONFIJC & i dont have any specific wanted connections ? cos being unprepared is My Brand, so i’m down to brainstorm w/ everyone who wants a crack at my mans kenny ~
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dulharpa · 4 years
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this is for hayley! @whistlingwillows a dear friend <3333
it’s meant to be a birthday present haha. i just want to shower you in love;;; so thought maybe i could go through as many of your fics and comment on them :^)))
(TO EVERYONE ELSE: please go to @whistlingwillows blog and read her fics!!! they are SO FCKIN GOOD AND AMAZING AND UGH HER MIND (it’s a lot of mcu and her bucky and steve fics are a*. i DEFINITELY RECOMMEND))
i wish you a VERY happy birthday and i hope we stay friends for many more years <3333333333 
i’m going through your masterlist heehee ;)))
ah first off, nice theme! i never could rlly see it before because i’m always on mobile heehee. also sorry for not reviewing them before??? i don’t usually read fics on tumblr as you’ve probably guessed;;
anyways, IM GON REVIEW THE SHIT OUT OF THESE >:DDDD
far from home -  bucky x stark sister!reader
firstly, i like how youre introducing the reader from buckys pov, like you can sort of already gather what shes like from them
‘Bucky can hear Tony’s soft inhale, feel the intensity of the man’s glare directed at Steve. He shouldn’t be eavesdropping, but a twitch of muscle would be enough to alert both men that he’s here. With the amount of tension crackling in the air, a brush against the wall would be equivalent to a thousand cymbals crashing in cacophony.’
IM CRYING ALREADY. the imagery in here is GLORIOUS. your tone here is so fitting! oo and the alliteration here is perfecto
ooooooo!! the backstory coming in  👀👀
‘despite what some people think that Steve and Captain America are two different personas, there will always be parts of Steve in the Avenger, and parts of the Avenger in Steve. They both want to believe in something good. They are, after all, one in the same.// Just as how Bucky and the Winter Soldier are the same man despite everything. HYDRA simply amplified the hate, fertilized the seeds of rage, curated the quiet thunder within his soul, within James Buchanan Barnes so that the Winter Soldier could thrive.’
yIKES! lol this is very character study like! nICE. it hurts tho, my poor children, i love you both 
oo ‘starlight eyes’ that is a very nice way of describing them
‘“Then what was London?” The protesters. “São Paulo?” The earthquake. “Vancouver?” Freezing cold water.//“Look, I care if Stark’s gonna run us over trying to find her. I care enough because she’s part of our team. Come off it, Steve. I know she can take care of herself. I’m gonna take a nap. Dr. Cho said no partying post-Singapore and what do you know, we throw the biggest party ever.’
ooo singapore uwu and london? (coincidence? haha jkjk) and the hints abt reader and buckys background are so good?? but so annoying??? like i just wanna KNOW yknow?? 
‘The water runs copper and the sting bites at his palm as he tries not to think. Tries to focus on the numbing cold that runs over his skin.’ 
your imagery is so vivid?? im actually in awe??? i am so regretful i havent kept reading your fics. like i know they are amazing, i just keep putting them off??? idk man. hopefully this makes up for it (gd tho, im still not done with commenting on one fic. this is what im doing with my motivation teehee ;)
‘ He feels weak. Tired. He wants to go back to bed but he also wants to stay out in the sun for a few hours more. The sun kisses his skin through the windows and he squints against the blue sky, wondering ‘
mood during this quarantine lol
‘“Oh, right.” Your voice is flat, uninterested, cold, as you stare at him. “You killed my parents.”Shit.‘
 OUCH LMAO THATS C O L D, O GOT +100 PHYSIC DAMAGE FROM JUST READING THAT
ooo robin as a nickname noice. very much gives me batman vibes lol
oh! and the way of doing the ‘flashback’ is neat! very original. it both tells us what happened AND buckys reaction to it again. he can re-analyse himself and reader. very cool
‘If you walk away now, don’t bother coming back!” Silence. Bucky can hear his own strained breathing, your soft sigh as you soaked in his ultimatum.’
👀👀 yikes that ultimatum. :// not good bucky. tbf theyre both trying to hurt each other but Yikes
eyy!!! readers pov!! finally! and the switch after we find out the outsiders pov? brilliant
oh no :(( more angst
‘When’s the last time you saw your therapist?”“Don’t have one. I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself.”’ they BOTH need therapists;;;;
very good fic!!! :DD they rlly do hate each other! i definitely like how you went back and forth with the timeline! it gave me a v strong idea on what yn was like even before we rlly got introduced. i am now very curious on where reader is? i love your characterisations! 
i will read the 10k+ fics but heck the last one took me ages lolol (i will comment in the future tho!! i promise <3 ) (that took me over an hour jjhghgdjh)
slipping away- amnesiac modern bucky x reader
omg,,, AMNESIA! >:DDDDDD
‘ Put your fucking seatbelt on’
oh no, istg theyre going to have a car crash arent they (’ doesn’t put the seatbelt on to spite you.’ NO PLEASE PUT IT ON U DUMBASS)
ok,,,,, at LEAST he put it on before he got hit, thank heck. but still. youre so cruel to your poor characters lmaoo
oh gosh
‘You fall apart slowly, like pieces of you peeling away until you’re nothing more than your broken heart. The sobs that wrack your body are relentless and you shove your forearm into your mouth to muffle your cries. You want to bite into your skin. You want to distract yourself from the agony tearing you to shreds. You want to feel anything but the pain.///Tears sweep into your hair, cloud your vision and your whole face floods with heat as you try to breathe through the pain. You’re cleaved into pieces on that bed, eyes squeezed shut as the tears keep flowing, and your throat burns’
this hurts damn, it is so vivid?? i can really feel it 
i am so glad you got into writing yk?? so glad
NO PLS, TELL HIM. TELL HIM :((( ‘shes nice once you get to know her?? shes known nat for years now!! years!!
oh god ‘he looks younger without the burden of your time together’ this is so angsty omg
‘Well, he was stumbling through his apology and I just let him finish.” Your body fills with warmth as you remember his embarrassed smile, the way he shoved his baseball cap farther down his head, chin tucked to his chest, trying to hide that face. “When he was done, I opened my mouth to say something polite but what came out was ‘You look like someone I’d very much like to kiss’.”
this is so soft i stg im crying in the club
OH SHITTTTTTTTTTT , you left it off like that!!! thats so cruel!!!! i can’t!!! how dare you!!!! :””””””((( im typing this with tears in my eyes ill have u know!!
anyway!!! very good fic!! you could honestly make that into a longfic very easily lol. i felt too many emotions :(( 
i was just about to say where is the fluff!! where is it!! when i saw the next one and yay :))) pls i cant have more angsty stuff rn
.
cookies and rings and things bucky and reader
‘how much do you love me?’ ‘count the snowflakes, multiply by a million’
did you have to start the fic off with such a SOFT line? its so soft! so TENDER 
‘He wonders what kinda insane person wears socks without any clothes on, but then decides that it’s the kind of person who’s fallen in love with him.’  jesus, the soft moments filled with love are the greatest <3
you can write fluff so well, whyd you have to pain me with all that angst ;””””) (1/10 hurt, 9/10 comfort is the way to go lolol) (jkjk ill read the angsty ones too when i have the spoons) (gonna reread that hydra steve one and ik thatll fuck me UP)
‘ Then, he can feel the cold metal of the ring she slid onto her own finger less than twenty-four hours ago and realizes that he had thought a lot of things shouldn’t be possible, and yet they still are. ‘
you literally brought me to tears reading this softness, you have truly found my weakness
‘ She’s so damn gorgeous with flour on her face and eye bags beneath her eyes that he’s sure she will inevitably make his heart burst ‘
he already likes her so much! i can’t believe this is affecting me so much :’)
‘Bucky is quite sure Sam is in love with his girlfriend in the fact that he’s in love with the fact that his girlfriend is possibly in love with Bucky’
this is so soft??? sam loves reader bc reader loves bucky sm. pls my hear <3333
you do fluff SO WELL DAMN 
‘F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s voice echoes in his small little perch and he still thinks it’s weird without having the side effect of Stark in his suit chasing after him to hear the A.I. but he shoves that uncomfortable feeling of the dead man out of his head. That is too much regret to unpack right now on a mission. ‘
yike bringing back that reminder oof
but thats so soft??? (i am def overusing soft but,,,,, i love it and the vibe) she sent him cookies! god i can feel the love  
‘She expresses her feelings through cooking, which Bucky has learnt the hard way. One time, they got into an argument over something stupid—he can’t even remember what started it—and came to the kitchen at 2AM to see her sitting at the kitchen island crying her eyes out and surrounded by baskets of muffins.’
<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 my hEART
you show how much they love each other in so many ways??? i am dying
“Alright, I like it.” Rolling his eyes, he pecks her forehead and she smiles victoriously. It’s so adorable that Bucky, with less than three hours of sleep, adds, “God, I want to marry you.//”“What?”//Oh.Shit.
oh my god! i am literally tearing up!!! AGAIN!!!!!!!!
oh shit o am literally crying
your fluff got me crying harder than your angst i hope youre happy
I really hope you enjoy reading this?? i keep forgetting to like text you but i wanted to do something for your birthday. especially in quarantine when everythings gone crazy. one year i swear ill do something REALLY good for you. not making promises bc i hate if i dont. but ill like, learn how to podfic because you D E S E R V E  I T 
ive spent like three hours doing this lolol 
thank you so much for everything hayley!
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ayediosmila-blog · 4 years
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hi everyone i’m mini, i’m excited to play my new muse with everyone! as always, i wrote way to much, welp. if you get through this you’re a champ! 
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(FEMALE. SHE/HER ) you know MILAGROS VENTURI, right? they’re TWENTY ONE and majoring in SCULPTURE/ARCHITECTURE? still nothing? well, they look exactly like BECKY G, so you can’t miss them. i’ve heard they’re really DEDICATED, but super MESSY too… it makes perfect sense that they’re a AQUARIUS. anyways, if you see them, tell them they left their PHONE in class and that i have it. ( mini, est, she/her, 23 )
Like this and i’ll im you to plot <3
⇢ STATS 
FULL NAME: Milagros Antonia Rivera De Costa Venturi
PRONOUNCIATION: MEEEE-LAH-GROSS
NICKNAMES: millie, meels, mil, mila, shorty,
AGE: 21
D.O.B : January 25th 1998
HEIGHT: 5′0
OCCUPATION: barista
ZODIAC SIGN : Aquarius
SEXUALITY: bisexual 
NATIONALITY: American
ETHNICITY: Mexican
BIRTHPLACE: oaxaca, mexico
CURRENT LOCATION: new york city, new york / seattle washington
LANGUAGE SPOKER: english, italian, portuguese, and spanish
⇢ ORIGINS
So milagros was actually born in oaxaca, mexico, but she was given up to her aunt who eventually gave her up to the officials.
mila was moved to different adoption agencies, and at two years old she ended up in one in mexico city where she met her parents. 
It wasn’t long after until mila moved to the USA, ending up in new york with her new family. 
Marco and Claudia Venturi were already parents to 6 boys - who were closer to being men at the point milagros showed up. One thing they didn’t have was a girl, and since they couldn’t get it the old fashioned way, they decided to just adopt instead. They had the means to do it anyway.
Marco Venturi is a retired politician, he’s had a very reputable career, and now since his retirement he works a lot with habitat for humanity and his ultimate goal is for inclusive spaces. 
Claudia De Costa Venturi is a fashion designer with a known reputation in europe, her brand DCVenturi became popular in the american market as well
The family lived in New York, New York City most of the time, but both Marco and Claudia wanted their kids to see the world, so they travelled often, and it became easier since a lot of their kids were older, so the only ones that would go where the younger ones.
If you were to ask Milagros what she remembered from Mexico, it wouldn’t be much. Growing up she didn’t feel different from her siblings, and her parents never made her feel like she ever was either. her parents didnt even want milagros to forget where she was really from, so often they would go on trips with her to mexico, and decided to keep her original name. 
⇢ BACKGROUND
to this day, milagros hates her long name, it’s super difficult to fill in on documents and it’s annoying when it comes to having fill out forms. She often goes by Mila, but Millie would be the second most nickname for her
she went to the best schools, often private where they had the uniforms, it was sort of a gossip girl situation with her growing up, except she was captain of the cheer team, and she was on other things like track team, prom committee, drama club, art club, music club. she was involved a lot because her parents put her in a lot of extracurriculars out of school too.
because her parents are influential, millie’s been on a couple papers, she loves to get dressed for night outs. fashion week is exciting for her, and she definitely sometimes got caught not in her best by random strangers. 
Besides her parents, she’s had to deal with the lives of her brothers, and they’ve all come out successful whether it’s owning a restaurant, being some kind of YouTuber, or even an everyday teacher. not to mention it sucked being the youngest and a girl with so many older brothers.
the Venturi kids had everything at their disposal, and as you can see, millie’s only problem was figuring out what she wanted.
you’d think millie knew what she wanted, right? not at all. honestly for her a lot of what she was doing was bc her parents made her.
when millie turned 18, she decided she wanted to reconnect with her biological parents alone, and as much as it made her parents uncomfortable, they agree to let her go alone. So for a few months, she lived in Mexico, with her cousin because alone didnt meant alone alone lol 
millie met her real parents, and that in itself was emotional. for the rest of her time in mexico she learned about the culture, the people, it was a big game changer for her.
she knew that she was different than her family, she saw it growing up, and there ofc were people who would tell her, in a way she went into a bit of an identity crisis.
⇢ POST-SECONDARY/PERSONALITY/NOW
She didn’t want to live in New York much anymore, kinda tired of a super busy city so she decided to go to somerset in seattle washington for sculpture and architecture.
her parents were surprised since millie could have gone to any school in the state, ivy league even.
even if she got into somerset a, she actually deferred for a year, so she’s only been at somerset for 2 years. 
millie decided on sculpture and architecture because she lives the idea of designing buildings and homes. after uni she wants to go abroad and help construct homes for those who can barely afford it, or somehow work together with Habitat for Humanity.
in her free time she really likes doing pottery, often you can catch her at uni after hours in the labs doing something. 
besides there, you can find her in a coffee shop nearby the university called Second Cup. it’s not like she needs money since her parents fought her to pay everything for her - mila just wanted to work, so she does as a barista and it’s really the only time she’s the most social. catch her doing some cute latte art with your drinks cos she’s bored. 
mila fortunately lives alone but she’s barely there, so the living room is spotless but her work room, cos ofc she lives in a two bedroom but she lives alone, sdfkjsadk her work room is what she calls ‘an organized mess’ and it’s where she’ll have her supplies and models. 
millie is very much go with the flow and down with everything when she’s not busy working or doing school stuff
she was very much involved in high school, and in uni she’s.. half involved? she’s a part of some clubs but not rlly, most of her time is spent in art labs or sketching in the library
she had a bit of a wild youth, and now she’s kind of chill but if you were to get her drunk, she’s a fun dumb, says really stupid stuff and laughs at everything. she kinda just wants to hug everyone. 
ppl call her perfect cos she has money, knows how to do a lot of things and millie hates it bc she has her own insecurities too
sometimes she can get snarky, especially if you’re on her bad side. she loves to argue, and even when she knows she’s wrong, she’s right. no questions. 
don’t hate her but she’s forgetful asf if it’s about everyday things. 
her favourite holiday is winter, she loves ice skating, snow, hot chocolate, peppermint. catch her apartment already have a christmas tree up while some christmas lifetime movie is on tv lol
she’s pretty much a sweetheart unless you piss her off lolol she’d love to pick someone’s brain over a cup of coffee.
if you give her a reason to dress up she loves it, if she has no reason you can catch her in sweats, especially if it’s cold outside.
when it comes to relationships, they were always hard for her since she wasn’t sure if they liked her for her money, her status or to gain some connection to her family. she’s dated people who are both rich or poor, and so far she’s unimpressed with everyone lol
her friends are.. a lot bc she’s rlly not picky with who she’s friends with when she probably should. 
⇢PLOT IDEAS/CONNECTIONS
neighbours!
met at a drunk and turn out to be in the same class
cousin!
childhood friend
exes good and bad
coworkers
could have met in the library, 
study group/study buddy
maybe they met at some club 
a connection where one is using the other
crush
fwb?
just
evERYTHING
but honestly i want all the plots!!
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sodomyordeath · 4 years
Text
Queen of Drags
Finally the post many of you asked for since the show went into heavy promotion.
This is going to be long. To keep this from being too boring I decided to publish it in form of an ongoing conversation between myself and the one and only Chiara.
Me: So let’s start with the cast and the jury.
Chi: On the jury side we have Conchita Wurst.
Me: Guess we have to disclaimer this?
Chi: She’s our friend, She knows and loves Drag and is a talented and amazing performer. So disclaimer done.
Me: Next we have Bill Kaulitz.
Chi:  Wasn’t he in some kinda child band?
Me: Yep Tokio Hotel, they are still around. he was also a judge on an music casting show back in the early 2010s. 
Chi: Garbage music[1]?
Me:  “Deutschland sucht den Superstar”. So nothing you or I would call music.
Chi: Right. Garbage music.
Me: And we have guest judges.
Chi: One per show right?
Me: Yea even in the final episode. They use a point system. Each of the for judges awards points. The highest number per episode is the number of contestants left.
Chi: The lowest is one or 0?
Me: Normal people start with one.
Chi: So decimal system than?
Me: Smartass.
Chi: I am smart and I have an amazing ass.
Me: No arguing with that.
Chi: So who are the guest judges?
Me: In order of appearance:  Olivia Jones, Amanda Lepore, Leona Lewis,  Pabllo Vittar, La Toya Jacksona and for the final Laganja Estranja
Chi: So 4 judges that know there shit and 2 professional singers. That’s a lot better than a typical Drag Race season.
Me: Yes and they actually do matter due to the point system they used.
Chi: So what do you expect from our 3 permanent judges?
Me: Obviously the best insights will come from Conchita and some of the guests. Bill will focus on overall performance aspects, stage placement, lip-sync etc. and Heidi... well looks and she brings the “girl at the drag bar” perspective.
Chi: Well we cheated here didn’t we?
Me: Yes because that was how it played out and Conchita felt like kind of the head judge the entire season but what we expected because of the pre show PR was Heidi dominating the show and giving us her model casting show 2.0.
Chi: Did Pro 7 fuck it up with the trailer where they framed Heidi as the head judge?
Me: Well at this point in time I don’t think they tried to provoke the backlash they got. They just tried to frame the show in a way so there usual audience sees someone they are familiar with.
Chi: So you don’t think the baited the queer community and press into a push back just to get the buzz going?
Me: You mean a PR campaign that would exploit a marginalized community to sell a commodity? That would by cynical!
Chi: ...
Me: Moving on. Let’s talk about the artists.
Chi: I honestly didn’t know much about any of ‘em.
Me: Not even your “home girl”?
Chi: Do I have to remind you that I’m from Zurich and  Hayden Kryze is from Bern? Plus I wasn’t in Switzerland for an awful lot of time in the last 2 years.
Me: Right and she's rather young isn’t she?
Chi: 20
Chi: Speaking of age Catherrine Leclery is the oldest cast member with 48 and seems to be the one who’s in the business the longest, Hayden is the youngest.
Me: Hmm, what I noticed is that anyone but Catherrine is under 35.
Chi: I feel old now.
Me: I knew about the 3 Berlin girls but never worked with any of ‘em. 
Chi: That’s Bambi Mercury a bearded queen not related to our friend Bambie the high priestess of gore. Candy Crash a funny bitch who paints her face on youtube and the “infamous” Katy Bähm.
Me: You know Candy had me when she renamed Katy into “Käthe Baum”
Chi: *lough crying* me to bitch!
Me: But really Candy is a miracle she managed to age 5 years since she was in a documentary in 2018 
Chi: *sings* Forever Young, I want to be... forever.. 
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Me: Still I like her and people I know, who worked with her, like her.
Chi: Too bad she doesn’t make wigs...
Me: *spills drink* *side eyes Chiara*
Me: Looks like we both are not turning into Käthe Baum fans any time soon.
Chi: I learned a saying from the southern United States “Bless her heart”
Me: Moving on. Janisha Jones.
Chi: We didn’t know her before the show
Me: But our good friend Ephe Drine knows her and as a Munich queen with spanish roots (like Ephe) she’s somewhat of my “home girl”.
Chi: We did run into her however and she’s a lovely person,an true artist by heart and a way better drag performer than it came across on the show.
Me: She sadly was the first one that went home but if you get a chance to see her. Do it. She doesn’t disappoint.
Chi: Next up is Samantha Gold.
Me: Oh yea our full figured Bar Queen from Hamburg with Austrian roots.
Chi: Old school drag. She was the second one out. 
Me: She did sing live on episode one and her performance was...
Chi: ...not as strong as we would have expected from someone who does that for a living.
Me: Moving on.
Chi: Now my “home girl” Hayden Kryze.
Me: She’s young.
Chi: She sure has talent but it felt...
Me: Aimless and her performances where sloppy
Chi: Unpolished. She sure can move and the whole “I can be a manly man but also a hot drag queen” segment was...
Me: She’s young
Chi: Speaking of young Aria Addams.
Me: Not related to my drag daughter Wendy Addams
Chi: That we know of. I mean age wise she could be hers.
Me: And they sure have the same fire and undeniable talent.
Chi: She was the big one for me. She grew episode to episode was never afraid to try something new and wasn’t annoying. I’d love to work with her at some point.
Me: Speaking of people one wants to work with, Vava Vide.
Chi: I had no idea that there even was a drag scene in Stuttgart.
Me: There were 3 standouts in the cast when it comes to drag as visual performative art form, Vava Vide, Bambi Mercury and, to a lesser degree, Aria Addams.
Chi: I do agree but I would also include Janisha. Alas her time on the show was too short for her to really show it.
Me: We are missing one.
Chi: You clearly had a nap under the shade tree my love. You forgot Yoncé Banks, the first Queen of Drags.
Me: Oh you are right but I really forgot about her because, and that’s just me, her kind of pretty girl drag packaged with rather limited dance performances and the most questionable tuck since Jade Sotomayor on Drag Race season one is very very boring to me.
Chi: You never tuck.
Me: I don't do pretty girl drag so I don't have to.
Chi: ...
Me: Come on it’s not only the tuck it’s the fact that her tucker underwear was clearly visible ever single episode. Make sure that your stage outfits do fit kids.
Chi: So you don't agree with her winning?
Me: Well, and that once again is just me, she’s a one trick pony that never stepped out of her comfort zone in any meaningful way and she should have gone home for her Horror/Halloween performance.
Chi: You sound like Michelle Visage.
Me: Oh my dark lord you are right.
Chi: lol
Me: Anyway I would have loved to see Aria Addams win because from the top 3 she has the most potential and showed the most growth.
Chi: I have to admit for all the lip service production was paying to Drag as an art form during the season and even when the sent the other “pretty girl”  Katy Bähm home over Bambi Mercury I had hope. Handing the win to  the rather conventional Yoncé Banks felt like a let down.
Me: That’s what I’m saying. It felt like “We want a mainstream compatible winner for our sponsors.” and the medical problems Aria had sure helped create the perfect pretext to do just that.
Chi: My background is in marketing and the cynical voice in my head does agree with you but do we really want to know?
Me: Does it actually matter in the end? I think not. This show sure had it shortcomings but it managed to do 2 things. First it felt a lot more relaxed and “real” than Drag Race ever did. I loved it when they all went out partying. Second to give the German public an idea of how wide contemporary drag as an art form is.
Chi: On the competition side I liked the point system they used. I loved Conchita who was an amazing head judge and all the guests did really really well. Amanda Lepore is in deed one of the sweetest humans alive and Laganja Estranja is a grown up now.
Me: And she single-handedly gave a masterclass in how a dance focused Drag performance looks in 2019.
Me: There was a little too much crying for me and we never got into any depth about the problems we as a queer people face. Only this snippets with the “same old same, old” mainstream media always pulls when they talk about us.
Chi: That’s a narrative problem in wider media and the editing sure felt exploitative in some parts. Especially you as a long time activist pick up on such things almost intuitively.
Me: Yes it felt a little odd that Katy’s sob story had more screen time than real activists like Vava got and I absolutely loved it that Bambi refused to part take in the trauma navel gazing.
Chi: Oh yes Bambi had a couple of power moves in this season and I love the fact that she had the trans flag on stage with her in her opening performance.
Chi: Any last words?
Me: Aria Addams should have won the title. Candy Crush should have stayed longer and the top 3 should have been Aria Addams, Vava Vide &  Bambi Mercury because I greatly enjoyed what they brought to the table.
Chi: I’m not mad that Yoncé Banks won but I’m underwhelmed by it. I want to put the focus a little on  Catherrine Leclery[2]. She was never afraid to try something new and turning her Fairytale performance into a political statement about the rights of Indigenous people to a fucking Disney musical song was very very smart.
Me: Over all where do we stand?
Chi: Better than expected. The artistry was there the talent was there the presentation was fine for the most part. Going clubbing and having that spa night made this show more real and honest than all seasons of Drag Race combined.
Me: They did have a budget for the show and they used it well. For the future I hope they can get rid of some of this tired reality TV tropes like this fake and over exaggerated conflicts and keeping around contestants because they are a source of drama. I want to see the performances in full not this snippets that look like they’ve been edited by an hyperactive 10 year old who got his hands on 6 cans of red bull. Season 2 will show if it will evolve or turn into the usual shit show that passes as tv entertainment these days.
Chi: I fully agree.
Me: Congratulations to Yoncé Banks for being the first “Queen of Drags”
Chi: Congrats!
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Picture: Martin Ehleben / ProSieben
Instructions: To get our voices right read her lines with a Swiss accent and mine with a Bavarian one.
Note: The content of the post is edited together from conversations Chiara and I had over the last couple of weeks since the Show started airing. I translated and rephrased when needed so she ends up sounding a bit like me at some points. I’m sorry about that. 
[1] For those of you reading this and are not in the know we both are multi instrumentalists and vocalists with a spectrum from delta blues & early jazz all the way to technical death metal and post industrial 
[2] She hails from Brazil with black and Indigenous roots
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spacejew · 4 years
Text
oops accidental personal post I guess
It's weird that I almost feel the need to go here to personal blog again because of a handful of irl friends following what was supposed to be a private personal Twitter in theory, just for like, idk, internet strangers and friends I made online not those imported from meatspace. Also those character limits... Suffocating.
Anyways yeah things are kinda stable but dissapointing lifewise? I'm definitely in a rut and stuck somewhere I'm desperately trying to get out of. Also like. idk. Gender shit. I think I really fucked myself over hard when I made the decision a few years back to conviously bottle up all my dysphoria and trans feelings and bury them and repress them hard and just live as a very gay and feminine bi boy and like. hm. I think I've been happy since? But im thinking now that maybe. Because that's still a part of my psyche that haunts me every day. I might actually have been mildly depressed this whole time and like, still struggling to make important life decisions because of the anxiety of that. Idk. Maybe if I got a therapist and realistic attention to that all those years ago and it turned out to be very real n legit and i got to make tough choices and live my truth, I would be equipped now to actually be joyful and able to fully focus on hard work and taking risks and putting myself out there and being successful and shit. Idk idk idk. I just have to wonder if all this time I've actually been quite unhappy and filling the void with dumb shit and a good deal of dissociation and complacency. Idk. what I'm saying is maybe I made a big mistake there lmao and could've started transitioning, if that's right for me, 4-7 years ago maybe, who knows. Haha so fun. Fuck me. Big Regrets, lads. But also I still don't know if that's right. Which probs means it is who am I kidding. Oof. But it's ok life is a journey I'm full of wise shit and I know it's not the end of the world. It just kinda. Makes me so sad on behalf of the old me who would cry so much because of dysphoria and living in this body in this life. She knew. I don't know why I buried her alive like that. Anyways.
I spent all year struggling to make an animated short (which ended up being kinda long tbh like 10 minutes?) by myself mostly, just me and my mental blocks and executive dysfunction and shit, but I was v passionate about it and worked hard and got to actually bring a whole vision to life, with basically nobody to tell me what to do, just give me feedback that I wasn't obligated to follow. It came out pretty nice and I'm very happy that I got to tell exactly the story I wanted and try a cool new look and I just wish I gave myself more time to work on the actual animation part but I put my heart and endless weeks and months of refinement into the storyboarding and script and every little detail and I really feel accomplished and like it paid off -- and I even got to do a private screening at my summer camp job that I was called in to do one more time at the last minute right when I finished my film, it was a miracle and so perfect, everyone cried and truly loved it and felt touched by it. And then I went to animation festivals! And all this cool shit! But... I haven't been able to figure out a public screening thing yet. And I feel like all my excitement is gone now. And I really wanted to polish the look and some backgrounds a little, just some very quick rerendering and comp, but. I feel like too much time has passed, i just feel dissapointed. I haven't put it online yet cause I haven't done my public screening, cause of my stupid anxiety about little details and overall idk imposter syndrome I guwss I feel more ashamed of it than proud of it even tho it's probably good, and like I feel that everyone was excited to support me but probably nobody cares anymore.
Basically I had all the wind taken out of my sails. Oh and right when I was trying to get it off the ground I guess and push through, my grandma died. I'm so heartbroken I loved her so fucking much and. She never got to see the film cause of my stupid bullshit. I feel so bad about that. So so bad. Ugh. And it's a film very very hilariously blatantly directly based on me and my feelings and my real family history, ultimately besides other main themes it's about talking to your grandparents and family about the past and your current feelings. And in it the main character, a girl, cough cough even though it's basically me, cough cough go figure, gender shit, anyways the climax is her going back in time to talk to her great grandma, and it's very emotional and my best friend of like almost 10 years now composed and recording a music for that scene for me. And now when I eventually screen this, my entire family and also myself is gonna get torn to shreds by this scene more than intended because my own fucking grandma, who I was excited to show this film to more than anyone on earth, passed so unexpectedly without seeing it. Fuck. Why didn't I send it to her when she was in the hospital? Obviously cause if I did that that would make it real and she wouldn't get better and all I do is live in denial. Ugh. Anyways yeah. The point is I'm stagnant and in a rut right now and just want to move forward and focus on making new work and just get a real career relevant job already. Tough year hit a well needed high and now petering off back into misery. Not to be dramatic. I'm ok tbh I have a part time I'm slowly getting sick of and a loving supportive partner and some very good friends, tho not as many as I used to see regularly and that's kinda sad too. That's your 20s babey.
I just need to move on and make big changes. My pattern rn is like. Work fri-sun, if I'm lucky I get to hang out with friends or lovers, usually at least with my partner. on monday I recover from working. on tuesday I have dnd and usually get some stuff done but honestly just catch up on warframe with my clan friends. wednesday my partner and I got to the park and library for half the day and eat and draw and talk. on thursday I mentally prepare for work again and usually we go out to play another roleplaying game with her roommates friends. a lot of that free time that's been left unmentioned is spent being over at bae's sometimes so I don't have the ability to get much work done. Lately I've spent most of my time planning a dnd campaign which is fun but also too stressful on account of obviously I'm not playing it yet so like what's the point, sorry friends who have patiently waited for months for me to be ready to start the game for them. And also like. Yeah idk. just sad and confused and resting my weary heart and body after a very rough month after my grandma passed. But! I did accomplish a very crazy deep cleaning of my room. I threw out 14 bags of shit at the least. I wish I weighed it all, it was a lot. I feel so much more organized and cleansed from that. For the record I didn't have any trash in my room, nor was it every a mess. Just every single cabinet and drawer was crammed full of stuff and I guess I hoarded a lot of shit. I was able to throw away a lot of things I held on to be cause of sentimentality and I'm proud of myself for growing that way. So like. Idk. It's not all bad, baby steps. I still feel like I'm constantly improving as a person! I'm positive, optimistic. Just tired, anxious, and feel bad.
Also I finally got a new phone and because of my hubris I dropped it without a case and it shattered only two weeks in. The day I was gonna buy a case. But it's ok. Story of my life I guess. I can't keep everything pristine and polished forever, one day shit falls and breaks but it's still usable. It has character.
I wasn't expecting to dump everything like this, sorry yall. Thanks for reading I guess. Also I forgot how to do a read more on mobile lol sorry
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happypledis · 6 years
Video
youtube
Stage Review
This stage... just, wow.
First of all, Minghao looks like a rich comic book villain. And the green smoke definitely adds to that.
Second of all, I don’t know Victor at all so I won’t be reviewing him much, but he definitely impressed me.
Okay the first line Minghao sang? I was not looking at my phone cause it started buffering after Victor’s spoken part at the beginning, but the first word Hao sang, it drew my attention back. He’s never sang that sultry, ever? I do have to really quickly critique something: for the first few lines, I think he hadn’t gotten enough breath support because it was a bit weak.
But then after he keeps singing it got better and became even more sultry?? The camera did a really good job masking the girls, cause when they popped out of nowhere I was--to quote those cooler than me--shook. The choreography right at 1:26 was so nice and sharp, perfectly on beat. Also that shoulder tap move at 2:06? Really unique. I’ve never seen anything like it. It imitated both a heartbeat and someone tapping on one’s shoulder, to me. The music really reminds me of a Nu’est song btw lol. The fog was really cool, and I thought the moment when Victor returned was really cool.  The hawk/bird of prey background sounds were really dramatic and were a cool mood changer.
Then at 3:20... idk how to explain it, but the mood is so intense. And Minghao has a stage presence here that he’s never had before. In a way, being onstage is like acting, and in this performance, he’s definitely playing a role (*cough* rich evil sorcerer *cough*), and it’s seriously intense. It’s the only word I can think of. He seriously makes it look like the only person who matters is that backup dancer (the real reason he told carats not to want to date him--100% because of this performance lol). 
During Victor’s whisper part, I was surprised at his pronunciation, lol (sorry, I’m interested in language). Maybe he learned English and that’s why his name is Victor? He definitely has a good voice.
Then 3:51. I was expecting Minghao to rap too but then?? We get a falsetto? And not just any falsetto but one of the very first (and also for sure the very highest) that we’ve ever heard him sing?
(Also they have really good chemistry together, they perform well together. I’m glad Minghao picked him to come on.)
Then 4:16 when he sings that “ohhhhh yeah!”... honestly I can’t sugar coat it, it was weak, lol...but it makes sense because this was a very vocally tricky song for most singers. A lot of people get tired after being in falsetto (me included) and considering we barely hear it from him, he’s likely one of those people. He does immediately correct with the “yeah” though.
The end (them kinda hyping the crowd up?) really changes moods, I think they were just trying to have fun and interact with the crowd. But, it really did lose some of the story it originally had. 
Besides that though, this is seriously one of my favorite stages from Minghao, ever. Not cause it’s sexy (I’m asexual anyway so it doesn’t affect me either way lol) but because it was even a level up from his performance of Clap, which I previously had been really impressed by. I think it even topped his performance with Zhennan (Twinkle Twinkle Little Star), just because that was the stepping zone that gave him the ability to plan and perform this song.
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comicteaparty · 6 years
Text
September 13th, 2018 CTP Archive
The archive for the Comic Tea Party chat that occurred on September 13th, 2018, from 5PM - 7PM PDT.  The chat focused on Gemini Journey  by Tracy MacLauchlan & Yesenia Carrero.
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Featured Comment:
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Chat:
RebelVampire
COMIC TEA PARTY- THURSDAY BOOK CLUB START!
Good evening, everyone~! This week’s Thursday Book Club is officially beginning! Today we are discussing Gemini Journey by Tracy MacLauchlan & Yesenia Carrero~! (http://geminijourney.com/) Remember that Thursday discussions are completely freeform! However, every 30 minutes I will drop in OPTIONAL discussion questions in case you’d like a bit of a prompt. If you miss out on one of these prompts, you can find them pinned for the chat’s duration. Additionally, remember that while constructive criticism is allowed, our focus is fun and respectfully appreciating the comic. All that said, let’s begin!
QUESTION 1. What is your favorite scene in the comic so far and why?
Shen
i liked when she was getting ready for interviews and she messed up her makeup and her buttons popped 100% relatable
Tenor | Shinavar
Hi Hi! Q1: TOO MANY. But specifically I really enjoyed Veil's anger he morning after Gemini went missing. I just really appreciated getting to see someone actually care someone just wandered off, and him still having lingering emotions about the whole incident of her returning home.
aliceapproved
Oh gosh, that one was such a BIG MOOD!!!
saetje
whoo-hoo! Thanks @RebelVampire for putting on CTP. And hey all, thanks for coming :)!
Kabocha
Oh, boy, this is a hard one to answer, to be honest! I really liked the first chapter, where Gemini and Veil were going up against the Dragon-Roach... I was like "WAIT HOW CAN YOU HATE DRA--- Oh." Also, this scene: http://geminijourney.com/index.php?c=69 Veil. You are the best.
It was fantastic handling of that... Creeper Kappa? Is the flasher a Kappa?
Shen
i just give 100% of my heart to Veil he works so hard hes so tired let him rest
Tenor | Shinavar
Flasher, I'd say
aliceapproved
Gosh, yeah, the dragon cockroach was really creative and I'm SO HAPPY there's a Kappa and they had to do the "bow" move to "defeat him"
Tenor | Shinavar
But yeah I love how 'street smart' he is about like, everything going on.
Beyonce - Don’t Hurt Yourself
a book nerd with street smarts
Kabocha
Veil has no time for any of these Shenanigans
Beyonce - Don’t Hurt Yourself
he's amazing
aliceapproved
I really love Gemini's "guilt" expression in one of the interviews
Superjustinbros
Hello!
RebelVampire
yeah i think veil is also a great character balance to gemini. cause when you have someone who is into the shenanigans, you need someone to be a grounding influence
Tenor | Shinavar
I also really like that though because he shows a level of attentiveness and perception to the world around him. <3
saetje
yess! It's a flasher Kappa! Glad you liked that scene.
Shen
yeah sometimes the "straight man" character can come off as a wet blanket but he genuinely cares for Gemini. i'd like to see more of that, like how they mnet or something one day in the future
aliceapproved
Yeah! Veil and Gemini are such a dynamic complimentary duo, from personality, body shapes, and orange and blue colors!
Shen
EXCELLENt design
Superjustinbros
Oh yea, huge props for how polar opposites Gemini and Veil are
aliceapproved
OH!!! One of my favorite scenes is when Gemini firsts visits the creepy circus and the scene transitions to her perfectly waking up in bed. That was such a cool transition!
Kabocha
Yesssss!
mathtans
Yes, I agree, the two play off each other well.
Kabocha
It was!
Superjustinbros
http://geminijourney.com/index.php?c=198 Also, I like this scene, in part cause it reminds me very well of what happens to me some days
aliceapproved
I'm really eager to see how the circus devolves and how Veil and Gemini will handle it. Also those rad fox twins!
mathtans
(I may have to leave at a moment's notice when the baby awakens, if I suddenly go silent.)
Jess
You guys are so nice. I don’t know if I can add smilies fast enough haha
Kabocha
http://geminijourney.com/index.php?c=55 Also, the lighting on this page was woooonderful. I wasn't sure how to read Veil's expression though. It was kind of like... "wait. Do you not want her to move out? Or... Are you just... ....caught off guard by dog fire?" ....Then the next panel is like "Back to reality."
Jess
Yeah the scene where it transitions from her as a circus performer to her in the bed was one of my favorites. @saetje really owned that scene
Tenor | Shinavar
I read it as he's a bit hurt at the "You can finally be alone!" more than her moving out
Superjustinbros
wow that is some really good lgithing
Jess
I think that was the first time that I didn’t second guess the panel format
RebelVampire
to repeat something already said, i loved the dragon bug. that was such an immensely creative idea, and i think it was a great way to open the comic. we get a great way to get not only the impression of what the world is like, but we get to get a great feel for the personalities of the characters.
mathtans
I gotta say though, my favourite was apparently Death owning a flower shop that has the slogan "You Don't Gno-me". Gotta love those little details.
http://geminijourney.com/index.php?c=44
Tenor | Shinavar
GASP I MISSED THAT
OMG I LOVE IT
Jess
Yaaaaay!!
RebelVampire
yeah i give death's appearance an A+. that and gemini's confusion about why death asked about her immortal soul
aliceapproved
I looove all the mythology monsters at play in the background!
saetje
A lot of those details are thanks to @Jess who does final rendering/lettering. Flower-shop Wraith/Death will actually be showing up again I think next update, haha.
RebelVampire
http://geminijourney.com/index.php?c=45 although i was also distracted by the page right after. this feels so true for getting a job.
mathtans
It's the Wraith of Khan.
Shen
LOL Gemini's entire job ordeal is so relatable. "i workeds hard on this one application im gonna go get a treat" girl, same
Superjustinbros
hehee
Kabocha
http://geminijourney.com/index.php?c=157 Veil's distress :<
Tenor | Shinavar
Gemini sets off my inner Veil tho bc I know so many friends who do like
1 app a week
Shen
UGH hes so cute when hes sad XD
Tenor | Shinavar
and it's like: HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-
mathtans
Back to what Rebel said though, I agree the dragon as a bug was hugely creative, and a good way to see the main characters play off each other.
Tenor | Shinavar
istg I relate to Veil the entire job process lmao
Kabocha
I love the expressiveness of both Veil and Gemini, but yeah, I really really feel for Veil
aliceapproved
I love how much Veil cares! He cares SO MUCH!!!
Tenor | Shinavar
Did anyone else notice in he dragon roach scene Veil has Gemini's shoe the whole time as the weapon?
RebelVampire
i love that page, @Kabocha like the lighting plus that expression made my heart weep
mathtans
I like that Gemini did start to take it more seriously for Veil, or at least seems to have been at interviews.
RebelVampire
weep so dang much
mathtans
Tenor: I don't think I picked up on that.
Kabocha
Although, how much is Gemini caring vs the Circus influence infecting her with confidence?
Tenor | Shinavar
I realized it after I noticed Gemini running around without a shoe and had to go back to see where I missed it lmao
saetje
@Tenor | Shinavar AH! Someone noticed that!
Superjustinbros
(I'm gonna go AFK for a bit, got some things I have to do but I'll hopefully be back later!)(edited)
Tenor | Shinavar
IT'S CUTE BUT MAKES ME WONDER HOW WE GOT TO THAT POINT LOL
saetje
Yes, Veil took Gemini's shoe despite having larger feet than her. I could jsut imagine the behind-the-scenes squabbling about it
aliceapproved
OOOH Good point about the influence! I'm really intrigued by the hypnotic circus
Tenor | Shinavar
Kabo: Caring about what, specifically? Like, about the circus, trying to get a job...?
(Sorry if I'm slow on the draw, got kids here )
Jess
On our world dragons: Yeah. It came from a conversation that dragons are the pests of the magical/mythical world. To the roach/dragon thing just kinda took form from that Ahahaha
RebelVampire
yes i noticed the shoe and thought that was a great art touch of continuity
Jess
Ahaha yeah!!! I mean. My boi got nice shoes. He can’t be using them for that
aliceapproved
I'm really glad dragons have the roach aesthetic, too! As someone who loves all dragons, I draw the lines at cockroaches XD
Shen
yeah that poster at the end threw me for a loop i thought it was a legit magic look-alike so when i saw the poster i was like "whoaaa no way" haha makes me VERY interested to read more
aliceapproved
Veil is so clean haha!
Kabocha
@Tenor | Shinavar -- Just in general honestly. Gemini started putting more effort into things, but it didn't feel like she actually really gave a damn more than she had gained some level of confidence.
Beyonce - Don’t Hurt Yourself
i really liked gemini's haunted mascara
saetje
I'm glad you all like the Dragon Roach opening/idea too. It's also the idea...trying to imagine how mythical things might have 'evolved' along with our modern world, and yeah. Dragons are pretty much pests you always have to exterminate, yeah?(edited)
Kabocha
Although maybe that's the magic of the circus
Beyonce - Don’t Hurt Yourself
or maSCAREa
mathtans
I grinned at it being one of the flying types.
Tenor | Shinavar
Ooooh that's fair, and a good point.
mathtans
Made me think of ants. I hate the flying ones.
saetje
@mathtans directly related to past experience with real life 'flying ones'. Nothing makes a roach worse than realizing it's one of those
omg ants too
Tenor | Shinavar
Saetje: So would this modern world have those 'fortune cat' memes but with the dragons instead? Reblog for good fortune?
Beyonce - Don’t Hurt Yourself
god i related to that line so much bcus of how often i had to deal with flying roaches as a young childe
saetje
hmm, fortune cat memes? Like on tumblr when someone reblogs a picture of a cat with money on its head? XD
Tenor | Shinavar
Yeah~
!*
aliceapproved
OMG
Kabocha
I could do without the flying insects aaaaaaaa
aliceapproved
gEmini and Veil on social media haha!
Shen
i bet Gemini is a memelord
Jess
Yeah!! For the circus - we’re at the point not where we can start unraveling some of the mystery. Throughout the story so far we wanted it to be sorta ambiguous about if that Gemini in the circus was the same one. In the next oncoming scenes you’ll see what’s real and what’s not. But hopefully the way it’s being read is that the readers (y’all) are realizing it might actually be Gem
Tenor | Shinavar
I'd collect flying insects if they were smol dragons justsayin
Oooou~!
Jess
She is definitely a memelord Hahahah I love that
saetje
I doubt about dragons being seen as fortune memes since dragons are seen as pests and they tend to keep you from your money (ala sitting on the horde and breathing fire) or take loose items into their hidey holes-- so they're not seen the same as lucky. But that might just be for Gem and Veil's part of their world
aliceapproved
I'm so excited for the Circus to "unravel"
Shen
i bet she texts memes to Veil from across the room and then just waits for him to look at her in disapproval =3
Tenor | Shinavar
I've been under the impression the circus might not be entirely real and the performers there are stuck against their will - kinda fae-style. <_< So either she's performing against her will and is not yet fully bound or it's been an illusion to GET her there
RebelVampire
is veil thus the type to post all the old timey book quotes then? XD
in regards to the social media thing
mathtans
Yeah, at first I thought maybe Gemini was just seeing herself in place of who was actually up there, but with the poster it seemed likely that they were actually making her do the things.
aliceapproved
Oooh, I think it could go either way with trapped souls and she's not bound yet, or it's all an illusion to trap her.
Also, Veil posts moody aesthetic boards
Shen
XD
aliceapproved
"Juggling is not a garbage job" :V
saetje
yeah we're getting into I guess the third act and I hope it comes together and makes sense. as we unravel some mystery. There's more stories we want to tell after "Barley & Bay-Lily" that all follow continuity, so I want to wrap Barley & Bay-Lily where you all know what's going on but there's more overarching questions than answered in some ways.
I'm loving these thoughts on it!
mathtans
Clever play on Barnum & Bailey, by the way.
Jess
Thanks!!
RebelVampire
i want to say i loved the juggler. that was a great design and gemini's reaction to it made me laugh. although i do wonder now if the juggler is part of the circus conspiracy
mathtans
I wonder if it's significant that they seem to be foxes.
Kabocha
Foxes are tricksters, so I mean
aliceapproved
Kitsunes!
Tenor | Shinavar
My fear about the poster though, and why I hink it's a trap, is it said her "final act"
mathtans
'Tis true.
Jess
Also I don’t know if anyone noticed but the juggler was only juggling 2 balls with 4 arms
aliceapproved
Very fitting to make them foxes! Cute and mischevious and devllish
Tenor | Shinavar
so it's like; HHHHHHHHHHHHH GEMINI BBY NO RUN AWAY
aliceapproved
YEAH!! GEMINI GET OUTTA THERE
Jess
So lots of talent going on in the streets of New Olympia hahaha
mathtans
Jess: I caught the four arms. Guess I didn't count the balls. Seems like less of a challenge there.
Shen
"mysterious circus ive never heard of down a dark alley? sounds like a great time and not at all suspicious!"
Jess
Right!?
saetje
yes, what @Kabocha said. The idea for GJ is this is HER story/myth/hero's journey. Foxes are pretty archetypal to suspect characters in folklore and fairy tale. WHAT they are exactly, well. More to be revealed :' D you guys have some awesome theories.
mathtans
Maybe there was a chainsaw off panel.
saetje
hahahaha
Kabocha
This'll be really cool to see as it approaches the end
(of the chapter, anyway)
Tenor | Shinavar
yeeees
Jess
That’s true! Whether she was a good juggler or not is the true mystery
mathtans
The foxes are actually out of work actors.
saetje
oh god.
Mathtan you figured it out
noooo
Jess
Yesssss
aliceapproved
I misread that as "work out" actors LOL
Tenor | Shinavar
choke
saetje
oh even better
Tenor | Shinavar
Explains why they are trying to start their own circus
aliceapproved
LOL "Get BUFF with JUGGLING"
Shen
LOL
mathtans
Appearing next in the Big Top - Jazzercize.
Tenor | Shinavar
WHEEZE
saetje
Possessed Scary Circus Zumba
Shen
Crossfit but its clowns
Jess
That’s terrifying
Tenor | Shinavar
I h8 u all bc I can't draw this right now
RebelVampire
i would pay to see clowns doing crossfit
saetje
now tHAT'S a million dollar comic idea, Shen
or idea in general, yes
aliceapproved
I know it's probably way off in the future, but I'm curious about plans for Veil-focused arc in the future
Shen
yeah same, im sure its planned but im interested
RebelVampire
QUESTION 2. While searching for a job, Gemini clearly has gotten wrapped up in a dangerous situation involving a circus. What do you think the circus’ goal is in general for the people it entraps? Who exactly are the fox ringmasters running the show? Why was Gemini in particular targeted as opposed to other people in the audience? Why did Gemini seemingly come home in a trance, and what do you think it means for whatever is happening to Gemini? How do you feel the performer who represents Gemini’s ideals fits into all of this? Do Gemini’s anxieties have something to do with all this do you think? Lastly, how do you think Gemini will get out of this mess (or is she just doomed)?
Shen
i wanna know why he puts up with her tbh ^^; seems like she can be a bit self interested
aliceapproved
Also that it's confirmed he has friends cuz of that phone call. I'm sorry, I keep assuming he's a Sad Books lonely boy
Shen
no friends its just his mom
saetje
yeah you guys don't know if he's just sadly talking to a dial tone
Kabocha
The circus' goal is to... Basically steal her life energy! Somehow. But we'll see. Or enchant her and spirit her away~ Once she becomes part of the spirit world she won't really be albe to retuuuuuurn~
Shen
SAETJE THATS SO SAD XD
RebelVampire
well now you made it sad. XD
Kabocha
@saetje oh noooooooooooooooooooooo
aliceapproved
LOL! As for Question 2: Like most shifty magic things, steal her soul! Trap her in the circus
Kabocha
What about Gemini's mom? I'm sure he's probably got her on speed dial
RebelVampire
i assume soul stealing. i mean thats pretty standard evil fair. and who doesn't need a good soul
Shen
i dont think they targetted Gemini specifically as much as they laid out a trap and waited to see who stumbled in, and she did so they ensnared her
mathtans
Veil seems too organized to talk to a dial tone. It'd at least be the official time signal.
aliceapproved
I think the Circus targets ppl who are down on their luck or confidence or don't have a quote "real job" atm? Like job hunting is really stressful and feels hopeless a ton of times
so it looks for vulnerable ppl imo
mathtans
Gemini came home in a trance because the cab was too expensive.
Jess
That’s how I do too
saetje
BRB faking trance to get out of cab faire
aliceapproved
To heck with fantasy Uber and Lyft!
Kabocha
It shows them something akin to their best selves, maybe?
saetje
hahaha
RebelVampire
what if this is a known phenomenon in their world so when someone says "they ran away to the circus" they mean that whoops, got that soul life energy sucked out
aliceapproved
Yeah! The play of "UGH I should just run away and join the circus" it's so cool!
Shen
i once saw a video of a woman pretending to be a ghost to get out of paying a toll
Tenor | Shinavar
Q2: The specific part I havenb't already kinda answered is: I feel she is part of Gemini's subconciousness in the sense of having her "act" together. Her life wouldn't be too chaotic, she's able to balance all that is expected of her without being a 'clutz' or anything she seems to think at least minimally negatively on. (seen by her admiring the grace and such)
Kabocha
She's a representation of everything Gemini wants to be?
aliceapproved
^^^^
Tenor | Shinavar
Not exactly but def a bait, in some way
Kabocha
Except moving more toward that ideal means that Gemini gets trapped...
Well, representations don't have to be literal >_>
<_< I figured it was all pretty figurative
Tenor | Shinavar
True true
RebelVampire
the thing i cant figure out is why the trance thing. like gemini was in the circus, just suck out her soul. why give her the chance to escape?
aliceapproved
Since we see Gemini specifically, I'm assuming the audience members are just an illusion
Maybe these foxes like playing with their "prey" and make it a slow burn
mathtans
It could be through the music that the circus gets you. That alley cat seemed real scared of it, while Gemini was drawn in.
Alice: Oh, I like that.
Tenor | Shinavar
Rebel: If i works like fae magic, you gota get them to agree to it
aliceapproved
Yeah, why play if there's no risk involved?
mathtans
Rebel: To recharge?
Tenor | Shinavar
You also can avoid like - all legal repercussions if it's "willing" >_>
aliceapproved
^^^
Jess
Ahahaha consensual death is the best ... death?
aliceapproved
For lawyers, yES!
mathtans
Now waiting for the scene where Veil rules-lawyers the foxes.
Beyonce - Don’t Hurt Yourself
thats how it be sometimes
aliceapproved
Law & Order with VEIL
Tenor | Shinavar
Also it hurt a lil bit I couldnt resist. Crossfit clown from geminis world lol
Shen
JKRFJGJHMHG LMAO!!!
saetje
omg @tenor hahaha
mathtans
That's a garbage job. ^.-(edited)
Tenor | Shinavar
BUT I WOULD LOVE TO SEE VEIL THROW DOWN VERBAL LOOP HOLES IN CONTRACTS
saetje
IT'S NOT A GARBAGE JOB, VEIL. I mean MATH.
Tenor | Shinavar
Just like, pops on some glasses and busts out a book from no where
Kabocha
That's Veil's magic power -- BOOK LEARNIN'
Tenor | Shinavar
YES
Jess
Yessss
Beyonce - Don’t Hurt Yourself
magic is a thing, he probably just pulls out outta his pocket dimension- which is in his pocket
Tenor | Shinavar
He has a pocket just for his books
aliceapproved
I love all the art you guys do of Veil with his book beasts! They're the best!
Tenor | Shinavar
all 2k of them
saetje
haha,t hat's actually a joke we've been wanting to use somewhere-- "I love your dress" "Thanks it has pocket dimensions"
Jess
Omg I love it. All pockets are pocket dimensions from now on
Tenor | Shinavar
OMG YES PLZ
DO IT
aliceapproved
OMG PLS DO THAT
Tenor | Shinavar
AS A PARENT IT'S A NECESSITY wheeeeeeeeeze
aliceapproved
pockets are THE BEST
imagine a pocket dimension!
This world gets better and better! Minus the creepy circuses
Jess
Right
Hehehe
mathtans
"My pocket dimension is full of clowns...."
Jess
Nooooo worst dimension
Kabocha
I saw a few other people ask it, but... Why is Veil so tolerant of Gemini's shenanigannery? I mean, I am a far less patient roommate than he is...
saetje
I figure a pocket dimension dress would have to be some kind of plot device though for a future arc. i mean, HAVE to be.
Tenor | Shinavar
New def to clown car
Kabocha
matth whyyy
Tenor | Shinavar
Kabo: My shipping side if he finds it endearing
Exhausting but endearing
saetje
wellp, clowns ruined it
RebelVampire
i do applaud veil's sheer patience
Kabocha
I WAS LEANING THAT WAY BUT I DON'T KNOW IF HE'S JUST ENTERTAINED OR WHAT
RebelVampire
but i do assume the blushing is more than just blushing
Tenor | Shinavar
CON GRATS REBEL
YOU DID IT
Jess
Ah. Well be answering that soon. I think so far we’ve been focusing on Gem and some of her worst traits - her selfishness, but
Shen
nice~
mathtans
Kabocha: Because I can. As to why Veil's tolerant, maybe he knows someone like Gemini in his family or his past.
Kabocha
I figured Veil was kind of perpetually blushing unless otherwise upset.
Shen
i am absolute ship trash and i am waiting for this to sail but i am patient
Jess
And we’ve focused on veils best - his smarts and his loyalty
Tenor | Shinavar
I keep getting little hints Veil at least Likes her.
Kabocha
Hm. So he knows Gemini could be Amazing if she'd try?
RebelVampire
i think there is some of that yes
Tenor | Shinavar
But doesn't push it
RebelVampire
wait veil has bad traits?
i dont accept this
Tenor | Shinavar
No he doesn't
don't listen to them
shh
Shen
no, veil is perfect
Kabocha
Veil's afraid of bugs....
mathtans
Veil just likes Gemini for her shoes. Much shoe blushing, wants to wear them.
Tenor | Shinavar
Je
aliceapproved
I'm sure Veil totally finds Gemini charming and really.. pr-pretty BLUSH
RebelVampire
being afraid of bugs is a good trait
Jess
It’s true. And he won’t dirty his own shoes
RebelVampire
bugs carry disease
Tenor | Shinavar
But is he afraid of bugs
or the fact they can catch shit on fire
aliceapproved
Veil is very much a neat freak which is a double-edged sword
Tenor | Shinavar
like his books
aliceapproved
and not very impulsive, so Gemini helps liven things up for him
Beyonce - Don’t Hurt Yourself
tenor raises a good point
Shen
thats more "quirky" than a character flaw lol
like "clumsy" girls XD
Kabocha
They're foils for one another, you say? That's how these sorts of friendships balance each other? NEVAAAAAAR! ....I ship them unless there is a reason I should not.
Shen
these ship goggles dont come off
Kabocha
Several people are typing...
aliceapproved
Yeah, this arc is very Gemini focused and how she needs to grow as a character
I'm excited to see how Veil needs to grow as a character in the future
Kabocha
Yesh!
Shen
aye
aliceapproved
Gotta take turns!
RebelVampire
admittedly i do think veil kind of needs to learn to have fun probably
as a character arc
Tenor | Shinavar
But books are fun
Work is fun
saetje
well but organization is fun
RebelVampire
although i do wanna know now who veil is calling
and what he does with his not gemini friends
Tenor | Shinavar
RESPONSIBILITY
aliceapproved
Yeah, that's definitely something I see with Veil
Tenor | Shinavar
Just what the dr ordered
RebelVampire
i agree with organization and books but i meant more in how he carries himself
Jess
Oh! It’s a dial tone
RebelVampire
gotta learn to tweet those memes back
saetje
hahaha
Tenor | Shinavar
lmaaao
Shen
thats fair he could stand to lighten up lol they both need to learn a bit from each other. hes not got time for fun if he has to always be the "responsible" one because someone else took up all the "fun" XD
aliceapproved
Yeah! Guy needs to party and have an impulsive time for once rather than strictly schedule
They need to work together
Tenor | Shinavar
I do agree tho, with how in the know he seems to be, I'd like to know who all he's got, esp depending how they'll influence stuff in the future.
bc it seems he's from here whereas Gemini isn't soooo <_<;
mathtans
Veil can be fun. Veil can't be impulsive.
RebelVampire
yeah i do hope this circus experience teaches gemini more responsibility. in that maybe she should fill out more than a few apps XD
aliceapproved
Does Veil have a hard time making decisions?
Shen
"look how impulsively i filled out your applications for you isnt that fun?"
mathtans
Alice: Not if blueberries are involved.
aliceapproved
And yeah, Gemini certainly learning more responsibility and also, to trust in herself if she applies herself and focuses
Jess
Ahahaha
Tenor | Shinavar
I think Gemini jus needs to get to the point she doesn't need a child leash
Jess
Well and for me - I think when people are going through hardships, like Gem not being able to land a job, sometimes the worst parts of themselves show up. And while I love the character - (and hopefully) she’s shown to be kinda funny and not overly mean - I thought it was important to show her bad side early on
mathtans
I don't see her as mean, just easily distracted.
Tenor | Shinavar
^Same
She's irresponsible but not in a malicious way
Like if she hurt someone I'd be dead up surprised if it was intentional
aliceapproved
Yeah, that's definitely it ^^
mathtans
Tenor: She killed a dragon.
aliceapproved
I never thought of her as "mean"
Tenor | Shinavar
she is a sweet widdle cinnimon bun who needs protected from circuses and flashers
I said someone
Not thing
Kabocha
Gemini is Dovahkiin now lol
aliceapproved
I'm sorry, Mat, but they're pests in this universe. Cockroaches uugh
Tenor | Shinavar
Difference ;)
RebelVampire
oh yeah gemini is still super likeable. its more shes that adult who hasnt quite grown up yet. and youre kind of hand waving her to make stop being a kid 100% of the time.
mathtans
Fair.
aliceapproved
Yeah! She's like a kid fresh out of college
Jess
Oh good! Was kinda worried. But she’s definite selfish and flighty and I’m happy to see that it’s coming through
Without making her irredeemable
Draco Plato
yeah she's definitely still likeable
aliceapproved
Open to the free adult world, but still needs to learn how to adult cuz lord knows school prepares us for THAT
Tenor | Shinavar
Yeah nah there's not a mean bone in that child's body
Free spirit, I think is a good desc?
mathtans
The foxes are also spirits, but they're not free.
saetje
I'm glad! That's what we're going for- she's not intentionally harmful but has a lot of growing up to do. I don't think she realizes when her actions can hurt someone else.
aliceapproved
She's selfish and irresponsible, but there's still potential to be redeemed. She's a well-rounded character that's set up to evolve from this story and that's what makes sticking with this story so worth it!
saetje
no one's free when they teach Clown Jazzercise
RebelVampire
those poor foxes. gemini is actually doing them a service
mathtans
I wonder if this world has the Zodiac? Is Gemini's name at all related to that?
Kabocha
Pffff
Tenor | Shinavar
Oooh. <.< Good q
aliceapproved
Like, Veil is obviously responsible and an adult, so Gemini doesn't seem to think she has to think about Veil's feelings or words on some matters? He's got it all figured out! Me though? I need help. Veil, veil help me! What applications?! Not boring help ;; That's how I see Gemini
Kabocha
Gemini's the twins, yeah? Does Gemini have a sister, or a hidden second side where she's actually really competent?
mathtans
Maybe she's the good twin, and the evil one is in the circus.
aliceapproved
OOH, I'm curious about that, too, Math. I'm a Scorpio!
Beyonce - Don’t Hurt Yourself
that means you have a scorpion in the circus
Shen
"the twins" the foxes...
Jess
Ahahaha yesssss
saetje
Can't really reveal the Gemini connection yeeet buuut, duality and twins have some play in the overarching story yes!
aliceapproved
DUN DUN DUUUN
Shen
PS im a Gemini~
Jess
Me tooooo!! Yesssss
Are you also plagued by fox clowns out of work
Kabocha
Gemini probably hasn't really taken time to consider other people's feelings long-term. I don't think she's quite there emotionally, but when she actually like.... really has it sink in that she worried Veil, that'll be interesting. Although she did acknolwedge she scared him, so I mean
aliceapproved
Secret revealed, Gemini is called Gemini cuz Jess is a Gemini
Tenor | Shinavar
Naaaice ~ Also omg the fox twins ffft- Makes me think
Kabo: Yeah, I don't think she fully got how bad the scare was?
Shen
sweet im gonna name my next character Sagittarius
Kabocha
Yeah, it's the depth that I think she lacks
Tenor | Shinavar
Like "I'm sorry for scaring you but not sorry I did the action to cause it :D" levels of immaturity
aliceapproved
@saetje What's your zodiac sign if you don't mind sharing?
mathtans
Plot twist, Gemini sells her soul to the Flower Wraith Shop, and the foxes have to buy it back to keep their shenanigans going.
Tenor | Shinavar
kjdhaskj
Kabocha
When she gets more insight it'll be awesome as she grows
Shen
LOL
Tenor | Shinavar
Kabo: Yeeeeees
Jess
She’s two fishes
saetje
Pisces
aliceapproved
Yeah, Gemini maturing as an adult is really exciting to wait for
My sister's two fish, too XD
Beyonce - Don’t Hurt Yourself
twins............. two fish..............................
i see a theme here
Tenor | Shinavar
I really wanna see Gemini work for Death now hhh-
aliceapproved
OMG
Yes haha!
Maybe a temp job that doesn't work out somehow
Kabocha
Twist: Death only claims dead plants
Tenor | Shinavar
Mostly bc I'm stuck with Death having the VA as the Death from Conker's bad fur day and I just. Can't.
mathtans
"You should probably hold the scythe the other way."
Kabocha
"You're going to hurt yourself if you trim the shrubberies this way."
Tenor | Shinavar
"Why are you wearing all black it's hot af out go change, child"
RebelVampire
i hope death only claims dead plants cause otherwise gemini is basically going from one soul threatening adventure to another
saetje
haha so true
XDD
Tenor | Shinavar
WELL I MEAN
she just have to give death her soul
it's never said when
mathtans
Does it have to be her soul, or just a soul? Or maybe soul music?
Tenor | Shinavar
oh god
Just a soul can be how we find out Death accepts plants
RebelVampire
death better be a fan of soul music
saetje
you've split this concept wide open Maths
Shen
the sole of this shoe
Tenor | Shinavar
Shen NO
Shen
=D
saetje
SHEN YES
Jess
Yessss
aliceapproved
Another note about this story, is that I think it's a really good Young Adult story, cuz I feel myself and a bunch of other adults or kids coming out of college can relate to Gemini's story of trying to find work after moving out to live on their own
Tenor | Shinavar
That's Death's brother, Reaper.
mathtans
Veil: "Your spell checker has done you in. Gemini only has to give you her shoe sole."
Jess
Awwww!! Thanks so much
Tenor | Shinavar
Alice: Yeees. Tho I think this first big arc is good for younger children too
RebelVampire
the shoe in the dragon part was foreshadowing
aliceapproved
Yeah!
Tenor | Shinavar
Like my kiddo would love the art and atm if it goes where I suspect it might, it's a great lesson to learn young
saetje
Thanks @aliceapproved !! that makes me happy to hear because that's also what we're going for
Jess
Yeah actually when whenever we show Gem getting rejected I get real sad. Since some of it draws from our experiences
aliceapproved
You guys nailed it
Yeah, it was a big mood for me this year, so this story has been helping
Tenor | Shinavar
Rejeced? D:
Jess
Younger out of college Jess applied to be the new death - and I got turned down
RebelVampire
QUESTION 3. Though we certainly know Gemini and Veil a bit, much of their past history has yet to have been discussed. Why do you think Gemini has struck out on her own? Do you think it’s just to embrace adulthood, or is there something specific she’s seeking? Was there anything about Gemini’s journey into adulthood that you connected with? What about Veil? What do you think Veil’s backstory is? How do you think Veil and Gemini even know each other? Do you think Veil’s overprotectiveness of Gemini exists for a reason, or do you think it’s just part of Veil’s personality? In regards to their future, do you think that the two will be able to remain friends, or will their differing personalities get in the way of peaceful cohabitation? Do you think Gemini will be able to successfully get a job? Finally, will Gemini move out once she gets a job, or will Veil potentially actively sabotage it?
saetje
I guess now that we're getting more shows like "Aggretsuko" I'd say we'd like to hit around that target. Like, we're sort-of 'mature' only because of some of the (not-NSFW) themes resonates more with older folks. But hopefully there's still more to be enjoyed from a slightly younger YA/teen audience.
mathtans
Interesting last question there - I don't think Veil would actively sabotage, but might passively, without really thinking about it. "You can't move out next week, it's supposed to rain."
Shen
i think Gemini's irresponsibility combined with the double life (???????) shes got going on now is leading to a big fight with Veil. I dread it though
aliceapproved
SAME SHEN!!!
A big confrontation scene!
I can feel it coming
Veil finally calling out Gemini
I can only imagine the emotions!
Kabocha
...Can Veil handle confrontation where he gets pushback?
like, he can handle snark, but, an actual argument?
RebelVampire
yeah. veil might be the type who cant really deal with confrontation like that
Tenor | Shinavar
3: Gemini is homeschooled. If she's trying to branch out there's a chance she might either feel shackled a bit, or she's been encouraged by her parents to stretch her wings. Gemini ran into Veil lost puppy style, trufax. Brought her in from the rain and cold Veil's personality is probably tied to sorta trying to guide Gemini in the sense of law and order. Everything has a place, so you gotta do it- where you going coME BACK OMG I AM TRYING TO HELP YOU. I do believe here is going to be some strife at some point because Gemini has shown a lack of communication and emotional skill and Veil has shown a lack of willingness to bend. BUT I do believe this will clear up after some resolution from some juicy content So yes I believe they'll stay friends.
RebelVampire
although i think the confrontation is coming
saetje
That's a really great question, Kabocha. We haven't shown that yet :)c
Tenor | Shinavar
Maybe at worse a temporary not friends moment to crush our hopes and dreams
aliceapproved
Or maybe "not speaking" terms atm
RebelVampire
actually ya know what i could see as veil's big character arc is addressing change. cause the moving out thing may be more than veil just doesnt want gemini to go. it may be that veil is the sort that completely shuts down when there is change
saetje
y'all you guys have such insight, I'm loving your thoughts here. It's a relief to know you guys are getting a lot of what we're trying to put out and I love hearing your concepts, and concerns, for the characters!
Kabocha
I dunno that Veil realizes how overbearing he can be, to be honest. So.. Gemini's gonna get pushed to the edge and push back against him.
Tenor | Shinavar
Rbeel: Oooooh, that can be true too
aliceapproved
I think Gemini might resolve to move back in with her mom (which is LEAST wanted thing for her cuz I think she loves being out on her own), but Veil offers that she could still say with him, granted now that she has a proper not circus cursed job
Tenor | Shinavar
SOME chaos is good but what is his limit.
aliceapproved
RebelVampire, that's a really good note on Veil!
Tenor | Shinavar
Kabo: Yeah I get that. He seems so happy to 'help' but because he knows what you NEED to do to get done, he doesn't seem to fully 'get' that it's a lot for Gemini
aliceapproved
Veil's very much overprotective
Tenor | Shinavar
A bit of lack of empathy for the situation in the face of necessity?
aliceapproved
Yeah, like filling out applications is FuN???
Kabocha
He also doesn't understand how to break things down into smaller more completable tasks
mathtans
Gemini needs a source of income, maybe Veil's letting her stay for cheap?
Kabocha
he can handle a long list, but.... honestly, Gemini needs to feel accomplished at each step of the way and realize how much progress she's made
aliceapproved
Yeah, Gemini is a person that needs to be eased and break down steps, not all dumped at once
saetje
@Kabocha exactly- one of the flaws we've hopefully seen in Veil is that he can be pushy (literally physically pushing her around town int he beginning arc) and then tends to put too much on Gemini than what she's ready for at times.
Tenor | Shinavar
I got pushy though I didn' know the physical part was part of it
aliceapproved
Yeah! That page with her smushed with all his word bubbles was a great representation of that!
Tenor | Shinavar
I figured him grabbing her was because it was liTERALLY UNSAFE LOL
mathtans
Veil isn't as observant as Gemini, maybe because she's so distractible. He didn't realize she knew his fave berries and such.
saetje
Well I might've misspoke- it was more of a visual analogy for being emotionally pushy than, like, physically harmful or abusive.
Kabocha
He's basically trying to herd her lol
saetje
yes like a little sheep dog lol
aliceapproved
Yeah!
Tenor | Shinavar
OOOH OKAY
I getcha now lol
aliceapproved
Veil is honestly a toothpick and I bet a small breeze could push him over
Tenor | Shinavar
laskdjKLSDFJ
Jess
Lmao
saetje
omg
Tenor | Shinavar
Don't insult my son like that
just bc he can takje flight with those ears don't mean nuttin
Shen
LOL
aliceapproved
He's a GOOD SON!
saetje
oommg haha
aliceapproved
I love him!
Beyonce - Don’t Hurt Yourself
veil is a good boi
aliceapproved
Boy ain't gonna win a bar fight is all haha!
Bless this sensitive boy!
Kabocha
http://geminijourney.com/index.php?c=178 "You are in my personal space"
Tenor | Shinavar
Nah legit tho being the tiny I'm surprised he CAN push her, or at least shows she's willing somewhat to be guided
Jess
Guys. It’s the nose isn’t it
Tenor | Shinavar
omg someone draw me Veil getting carried off by gemini plz
Jess
He can do no wrong with a face so right
mathtans
Veil has a large picture of Spock in his room. Big fan.
Tenor | Shinavar
That's exactly it Jess
saetje
Honestly Gem could just pick him up and swing him around like a baseball bat if she wanted, I think.
Tenor | Shinavar
kaisdjfKHJDSF
I mean he is such a stiff
saetje
@mathtans definitely a huge Spock influence!
aliceapproved
OMG BASEBALL BAT
RebelVampire
veil's number one advice to gemini is to just think of what would spock do
Shen
PFFFFF
RebelVampire
then gemini asks who spock is
aliceapproved
http://geminijourney.com/index.php?c=186 < a M O O D
mathtans
Gemini to Wraith: "Dammit Bones!"
RebelVampire
oh i loved that page with the giant to-do list
it was a great visual gag
aliceapproved
I definitely "treat myself" for small tasks when there are still more or bigger tasks to do haha!
Jess
Lol me too
saetje
I was REALLY into Star Trek a while back and almost did some 4-panel Star Trek Gemini Journey AU comics...I don't know if I have the sketches anymore though. Kind of psyched myself out of them
I think everyone works differently. You gotta treat yourself once in a while though!
Tenor | Shinavar
^
Jess
But going back to the characters - we hope to focus on their dynamic more and more. We love all y’all insight tho!
Tenor | Shinavar
reating yourself is importaaant
I LOVE THEIR DYNAMIC AND AM HYPED FOR MORE
mathtans
Their dynamic is mezzoforte.
saetje
yeah I'm loving hearing all your thoughts and getting some insight into how you all are reading the comic. It can be tough when you're so close to something to really 'see' it anymore
I appreciate your thoughts!
aliceapproved
Yes! They're a great duo!
I'm always excited when there's an update and Veil and Gemini are interacting
And yeah! Ofc dude! Lots of pairs of eyes help
mathtans
Just want to say the style of the comic is really interesting... I don't think I've ever really seen it before, just having the one panel. Most trend to pages or 4-panel or whatever. But one panel can really speak volumes, even if it's just a reaction shot, done in this way.
Jess
That means so much to hear!
Tenor | Shinavar
As someone with a messed up wrist I appreciate it too bc scrolling hurts so this worked great
aliceapproved
I think the webtoons layout for it works really well for scrolling! I love reading updates before bed It fits so well!
saetje
Thanks! Honestly it's how I've always 'seen' it and I'm glad you all like that-- It's been a bit of a point of uncertainty for us. I'm hoping in the future we can get some sort of swiping option for mobile devices to swipe between panels on full-screen instead of always clicking
and yes! Webtoons has done well for us too
Kabocha
Yeah, I'll agree - carpal tunnel makes scrolling format hard, but your website is perfectly suited
thank you for having both options!
Jess
I gotta be honest when we made the decision to do it this way - we were so conflicted. We wanted to do this format becuase we envisioned it with simple panels and @saetje really works hard to make things look cinematic
Tenor | Shinavar
omg if you get swipe in I'd be so happy bc I do like 90% of my reading on my phone ;u;
aliceapproved
Yeah, I would definitely love that as a feature in the future. Clicking is fine, but it can be difficult going back and forth and waiting for a website to load
Oh yeah! This story really reads well as a show or film! The storyboard format
RebelVampire
yeah i was skeptical of the one panel thing at first but once i got used to it i thought it was really nice. especially for how much it allows to be fit on any one "page"
saetje
yeah! Tenor, we always wanted it to be REALLY mobile friendly. Like my ideal is to just let the panels fill a mobile screen and swipe to read. We just....aren't really programmers so we haven't figured that out so much yet XD BUT- I'm really happy to hear the one-panel tapping is easy on wrists! I've heard other people call us 'accessible' for that and that was an uninentional side effect but I'm happy to hear it.
aliceapproved
Yeah! Plus, you get cool scenes like the circus sequence back to Gem waking up in bed in the same pose as the juggler
Tenor | Shinavar
It's muchly appreciated too <33
RebelVampire
on a different note, im really intrigued by the fact that gemini's savings are in the form of like actual treasure. and im really curious if thats literally their hard currency, and if not, where did gemini get all that treasure.
Tenor | Shinavar
I think it is bc she says the coffee was a gold coin + a virgin's tear
Superjustinbros
I'm back!
Shen
"a gold coin AND a virgin tear what a rip off"
mathtans
They're paste gems.
aliceapproved
I think it's Mom's allowance to her before she moved
Superjustinbros
And glad you're aiming for a smooth mobile experience with the comic.
Tenor | Shinavar
So I'm curious, if you two are willing to answer this (and it's cool if not!) But what's inspired you guys to tackle this story? :D
Superjustinbros
I have to admit, sticking to one panel per page helps a lot
mathtans
Yeah, maybe Gemini should store up her tears and sell them on the street?
Tenor | Shinavar
omg math
saetje
omg
Superjustinbros
@mathtans
mathtans
Tear-able idea, I know.
Jess
It’s probably a bit different for both of us: We’re huge myth nerds but we felt like there wasn’t a story that really talked about what ppl just starting their journey was like.(edited)
Superjustinbros
oooo
saetje
@Tenor | Shinavar no problem at all! Honestly GJ has been through many iterations including an animated series pitch in 20...12?? It was my and @Jess 's senior project! It was always very heavily myth-inspired because we're really into that. It's a modern hero's journey
Tenor | Shinavar
Oooh~! <3
saetje
but basically what @Jess said
Superjustinbros
Did someone say, animated series?
Jess
Like the feeling of being unprepared to adult and the lack of jobs. The scariness of being on your own. Finding love, and losing it. And the fear of letting people down.
aliceapproved
That's a really good point, a Journey!
Jess
It’s why Gemini’s full name is Gemini Journey
aliceapproved
Also mythology is SO GOSH DANG GOOD
mathtans
I thought that was a clever play on words.
aliceapproved
I love all the mythical creature references!
Jess
And plus—- all this myth jokes Hahahaha
saetje
Yeah. What can we say--- we were starry-eyed animation students once (well, @Jess was a graphic design major)
Superjustinbros
Seconding mythology
and wow, that's quite impressive!
mathtans
Wouldn't want to myth out.
saetje
yes! I'm REALLY into myth, folklore, and fairy tales. Bookshelves are lined with them, and I still don't know everything. It's a really rich topic.
Jess
I was not a animator hahah but I like them. They are awesome
aliceapproved
World Mythology class was one of my all time favorite classes in college haha!
Jess
Me too!!
aliceapproved
and your animated ad was BEAUTIFUL
saetje
same @aliceapproved !
and thank you!
aliceapproved
Seeing Gem and Veil move is gorgeous and I could see little gifs of them interacting
mathtans
As for the question of the half hour, I'm thinking Gemini answered a "want ad" from Veil, looking for a roommate, and she was the only one willing to take the place. Everyone else thought he was too strict, would get upset if they left the milk out.
RebelVampire
oh thats good to know. i did wonder what the significance was in that her name was gemini journey
aliceapproved
when time allows to work on those kinds of things haha!
Jess
I think myths in general tell important truths about people while still being entertaining. I hope our story gives them justice
aliceapproved
You guys totally do!
RebelVampire
veil does seem like the type whod make horrified faces at the milk being left out XD
Jess
Yeah. It’s a play on the Hero’s Journey
aliceapproved
I wonder if Griffins will make an appearance. I love that Teacup manticores exist haha!
saetje
Definitely lots of fights about how to load the dishwasher correctly (if they even have one)
Superjustinbros
lol
Tenor | Shinavar
I believe you guys give them great justice! I's def creative and fun for sure! :D
mathtans
"You bought the powdered soap again...."
RebelVampire
posting a bit early but i feel we are segueing into the next question already
QUESTION 4. Although the world has present-day elements, there are also a slew of magical things. What aspect of the world intrigued you the most and why? Are there tidbits mentioned that you’d love to know more about in the future? Alternatively, is there any magical related creature or being that you’re hoping to see make an appearance in the comic? In regards to actual story canon, do you feel Gemini is familiar with this magical world or that she still has a lot to learn? In what ways do you think magical elements might come into play and make trouble for Gemini? Regardless of magic, what sorts of other conflicts are you hoping to see/do you think we’ll see, especially in regards to Gemini learning to be an adult?
saetje
@aliceapproved honestly one of our downfalls is @Jess and I want to showcase TOO MANY mythological animals b/c we love so many of them and have a lot of ideas for how they'd work in our world. But, to what cost to plot, ugh.
and yeah griffins are like on that list b/c GRIFFINS
Shen
give me werewolves
ill give you a dollar
Tenor | Shinavar
brb
mathtans
Magical dishwasher.
aliceapproved
VERY GOOD
mathtans
Do they have flying cars?
RebelVampire
have we seen a minotaur yet? need some minotaurs up in this joint.
and unicorns
aliceapproved
What I'm interested is the fact that Gemini is an Antlantean and I wonder how that factors into future story elements if any
And yes, PLEASE griffins, unicorns, and minotaurs
saetje
WELL, here's something I think I can give away that hasn't exactly been pointed out a lot of times in our story yet (we are getting to it): there aren't any humans in the GJ universe (http://geminijourney.com/index.php?c=74) so a concept of a werewolf to them would really be a "werehuman", haha. But there are other wolfed-figured beings like Wulvers from Irish myth.(edited)
Superjustinbros
Unicorns, you say?
~~suddenly thinking about centaurs~
aliceapproved
YEAH THAT'S RIGHT! I remember giggling at that "HUMAN TALE"
Human tale must be so boring to them XD
It's like OUR world, but NO MAGIC
oh wait, they're horror stories
saetje
^^ yes
mathtans
Is Gemini actually a magical girl?
saetje
I MEAN, there are some strong "Princess Tutu" influences already and even more so coming up
Shen
magical girls are my jaaaaaaaaaaam
RebelVampire
did notice gemini was an antlantean, didnt realize there were no humans
i actually hope the gemini veil fight happens
Superjustinbros
What does the transformation sequence look like
RebelVampire
so we can see gemini's home
that sounds amazing
Superjustinbros
I must know
mathtans
Gemini is a duck?
saetje
how did you know?
Beyonce - Don’t Hurt Yourself
a WHAT
Jess
Nooooo you figured it out
aliceapproved
I wanna meet Gemini's mom haha!
I've seen the art but gosh
or Veil interacting with them
Honestly, Veil and Gemini meet the other's parent(s)
mathtans
Waiting for the episode where Cupid accidentally shoots Veil with an arrow.
Jess
Yeah admittedly - the character designs for gems mom @saetje has done I’m really digging. I can’t wait for her appearance
mathtans
Veil falls in love with a dial tone. Very embarassing.
Jess
“Accidentally”
I love that
We need to rewrite the next episode stat
mathtans
He meant to shoot Gemini but Veil protected her.
saetje
um YEAH Math is going to be our new head writer
awww
mathtans
aliceapproved
LOL
Superjustinbros
Math, you should re-write all our comics/stories
saetje
omg agree
aliceapproved
I think you guys have a great Valentine's idea strip coming!
Superjustinbros
mind blown from the idea of a Math/SJB production
puns and jokes and visual gags everywhere
RebelVampire
i hope gemini's mom is super awesome. i feel like she must be and gemini wants to be awesome like her
mathtans
Let me try to get to 10 people reading my own comic first, maybe.
Superjustinbros
lol
I read your stuff and it's pretty rad @mathtans
mathtans
Would Gemini's dad still be in the picture, I wonder?
Superjustinbros
Gemini's uncle?
aliceapproved
Gemini's grunkle?
Shen
My dad? your dad?
saetje
hahaha, Uncle Saggitarius, Auntie Pisces...
aliceapproved
OMG
Jess
All dads
Superjustinbros
OMG
aliceapproved
HAHA!!! Great idea!
Superjustinbros
I dunno why but i always caught onto the name Saggitarius
Shen
in a shocking twist, veil isn't Gemini's love interest hes her dad
mathtans
Gemini could have two moms for all we know.
saetje
LORD
Superjustinbros
and it's totally not because I love centaurs
mathtans
(I now ship Gemini's parents, I guess...?)
aliceapproved
For Halloween, there probably should be a "Scary Human Tale" and it's filing taxes
Shen
XD
RebelVampire
well to be fair, dont need to be blood related for him to be her dad in a way. i mean he is basically pushing for her to succeed, teaching her stuff, and generally being the responsible adult
Shen
Veil is her dad confirmed
he loves and supports her and wants the best for her even when shes at her worst
Superjustinbros
daww
Shen
ps saetje and Jess i hope you guys are in DMs with each other just screaming about all the dumb shit we're saying XD
Superjustinbros
lmao
Jess
Are... you here with us
Superjustinbros
I never thought of CTP's featured creators ever doing that
aliceapproved
Repeating what a previous comment mentioned, it'll be fun to see how Veil falls for Gemini, like the spark that ignited his feelings for her and hopefully for Gemini in turn
Shen
LMAO
mathtans
Veil is actually a magic clone of her dad that was sent by the ghost of her grandfather, Thor?
saetje
oh, @Jess is my S/O so we're just chatting in our living room together and loving everything y'all say
Jess
But honestly this has been so inspiring
Shen
oh even better!
Tenor | Shinavar
BACK. #4: THe aspect that inrigues me the most is how diverse the world is and how it just is all one big melting pot. It's colorful and you've no idea what's around the corner. :D I'm curious if something like a Wendigo might get seen! :D
Superjustinbros
Daww, that's cute! (edited)
also WB!
Tenor | Shinavar
THaaaaank
Superjustinbros
np~
brb for a sec
mathtans
Wendigos is scary stuff. O.o
Tenor | Shinavar
Yes they are
saetje
I LOVE the myth of Wendigo! No plans, esp. because they start out as human, but. I enjoy that one a lot
Tenor | Shinavar
But also like, one of my favorites so-
That's fair!
RebelVampire
can never see wendigo in a positive light. 2spooky.
mathtans
Wendigone.
Shen
that eliminates vampires, too....
RebelVampire
i hope there are phoenixes. and i hope gemini doesnt know them offhand and freaks out when one bursts into flames.
aliceapproved
Would aliens fall into the category or is that too sci-fi?
Lol a fantasy world that has stories that are sci-fi
Jess
But what if we made a chain. And it’s a reheaded wendigo that sells burgers with square patties
Tenor | Shinavar
Y R U MEAN TO THAT CHILD REBEl
omg
oMG
plz
Jess
I mean —-
mathtans
Oh, phoenixes are fun.
aliceapproved
Phoenix chicks!!!
Tenor | Shinavar
"We sell Hyumahn meat"
aliceapproved
Little baby Phoenixes pls haha!
Shen
phoenix lady dating a merman
aliceapproved
Fresh from death!
I mean Rebirth!
mathtans
Jess: I got that.
Sassy twitter extra.
saetje
We've been throwing around a phoenix story idea! They're also a personal favorite
again: too many great myth/fairy tale creatures we love, guuh.
aliceapproved
Again as said earlier, I'm really happy that Kappas made an appearance, too! I love it when mythical creatures from all over the world are in one place together
Shen
i just love how he knew how defeat the kappa lol
mathtans
"Why's that bird hanging around the Vietnamese shop?" "It's a Pho Enix."
Shen
BOOO MATH XD
saetje
IE: we thought of Veil and Gem "babysitting" a sphinx and Gem keeps feeding it puns and popsicle riddles (junk food) when it needs, like, existential riddles for nutrients, ha.
RebelVampire
yes i do think theres a great mixture of things from tons of diff cultures. it really makes the world extra super colorful.
Tenor | Shinavar
AWH
Yes plz sphinx bby
RebelVampire
i bet veil has some great existential riddles
mathtans
Aw, those are cute drawings.
aliceapproved
AAAAWW
Shen
GOSH
Tenor | Shinavar
I'll hate it because the puns will hurt so much but UGGGH IT'D BE SO CUTE I'LL DIE FROM IT
Shen
SLEEPY VEIL MELTING MY HEART
Beyonce - Don’t Hurt Yourself
OMG CUTEEEEEEE
Kabocha
Awww, Veil, that is just way too cute ^_^
aliceapproved
Your sketches are SO GOOD
mathtans
(Speaking of, when do we get the pastries that I saw on Veil's plate for the CTP today?)
aliceapproved
Your guys' ideas are SO GOOD
saetje
older concepts BUT. Again. there are SO MANY potential for fun-myth-animal stories we tend to get lost in them, haha. I don't know how much/if any will make it into the comic
I'll mail them out Math!
Jess
The pastries were there all along. In your heart
aliceapproved
Do you guys plan to do little intermission stories before doing a big arc like this one?
saetje
yes! Just like the roach comic
Jess
Yup!
aliceapproved
Like the dragon cockroach felt like a good mini-story before we got a meaty story
saetje
we plan to do little minis between bigger arcs
aliceapproved
YEAH!
Tenor | Shinavar
Sweet! :D
Jess
We want to alternate between large stories and smaller world building stuff
Tenor | Shinavar
Exciiiiiited
mathtans
Anyway, gtg, baby needs me. Best with the comic!
RebelVampire
good luck math~!
Jess
Best!! And thanks for stopping by!!
saetje
thanks for coming Math! Best wishes
aliceapproved
Bye, Math!!!
Tenor | Shinavar
Oh more queestions~ Due to how your comic is constructed, do you find you have more time to work on it, and/or you got a good healthy buffer?
BYE MATH
saetje
oh that's a really good question Tenor!
Originally, for like the last two years we've had almost a 6 mo queue, because also only update bi-weekly. But we recently ran out of that queue because LIFE and freelance hit us hard XDD so we've been trying to catch up somewhat successfully. As far as page-speed creation, I think it can vary widely but both @Jess and I have gotten a lot faster than we used to be. When we're really able to focus after-work hours (no life and freelance jams getting too much in the way) we can do about 4-6 panels in a single week, about 10-20 hours between us
The thing is though, one of the draw-backs of single panel shots is you DO have to show a lot more, I think, than just a page-layout comic.
Superjustinbros
Oooh!
That's interesting~
also bye Math
saetje
like, if we took those panels and made them into a page layout we would get away with showing less, I think, and possibly saving some time? But it's hard to gauge because also there's panel layout and flow and page composition to consider that we don;t have to worry as much about
Jess
Yeah I was gonna say the same thing. Actually the full panels largest drawback is that you have to draw sooooo much. In a comic with many panels you could cut to a talking head suddenly - in ours, because of the layout we have to be very careful not to take them out of context too quickly and too frequently
saetje
yeah good point Jess
Tenor | Shinavar
That's a good point. It's such an interesting thing o consider because - I guess the easiest way I can describe it is like the illustrations in children's books. They can be just so world building and easter-eggy so it's interesting to consider the differences!
Jess
So it’s a mixed bag. On one hand you are making only one image at a time. Sometimes even usi a lot of the same assets. But on the other - it’s a full color illustration and having to show minute changes in expression to keep the pace from seeming too quick can be a challenge too
Yeah that too!!
RebelVampire
im curious if you took printing into consideration. idk if youve printed the comic before or ever intended too. just wondering how a single panel per page comic would work in that case.
Superjustinbros
Yeah, I see what you're saying, do one-panel updates but fill them with lots and lots of detail?
saetje
or if the pacing reads too slow too- panel comics (or comics made by animators in general) can also be too slow b/c us animators LOVE showing those minute pose/expression changes, which can sometimes read slow. I'm always stressed about the pace, ha.
whitneyandcompany
Hi! Love the comic
Tenor | Shinavar
I could see, in print form, largely remaining single panel per page, or for the more fast paced ones tweak to 2-3 on the page
saetje
@Jess and I always imagined the comic a digital-first production, but if we were to go to print it'd likely be something along the lines of what Ava's Demon did. Just, single panels-per-page. But @Jess being the graphic designer who often works in print too might have some other ideas on that
Hi @whitneyandcompany thank yoouu
Jess
So when creating one of the things we did as a priority is consider the mobile screen first. Which is the opposite of what is the norm. If we were to do a book it would be handled where we put a very limited amount of images on a page. Maybe 1-2 similar to Ava’s demon
aliceapproved
Yeah, the drawback of single-paged stuff is exactly that. Focusing more on some things, like a character going through emotions can read more slowly even tho it's important to the story
Tenor | Shinavar
ugh ilu for the mobile love lol
Superjustinbros
Just thought I'd say before the CTP ends- good luck with the rest of Gemini Journey, @saetje and @Jess. It's really coming along well and you're definitely got a good story here to tell as well.
aliceapproved
But it works so well for mobile scrolling, it's so friendly!
Tenor | Shinavar
Like I can't express how frusrating it is for me bc there's SO many people who own their own sites and it's not mobile friendly
saetje
thanks @Superjustinbros have a good night!
aliceapproved
Maybe you could have 3 panels per page if printed?
Tenor | Shinavar
I live on the go I NEED THAT MOBILITY ;n;
Superjustinbros
You too, and thanks for being here, @saetje!
saetje
@Tenor | Shinavar I got to be honest with you- as a webcomic fan and reader for MANY years I feel that
Kabocha
I really look forward to reading this in the future. It's enjoyable and to be honest, I wasn't entirely sure what I was in for at first... BUT it is a pleasure to read!
Superjustinbros
And cya to you as well, @Jess.
Jess
Awwww thanks!!
Kabocha
Thank you for creating an amazing comic. :3
Superjustinbros
Anytime!
RebelVampire
yeah im glad priority was placed on mobile because it is basically the way thing are going, whether ppl want that or not.
Superjustinbros
^
Tenor | Shinavar
YES it was a fun surprise! (And def last minute for me bc I didn't realize it was something I could read lmao OTL)
saetje
Thank you @Kabocha for your wonderful insights and kind comments! Thanks for coming
RebelVampire
and its definitely a beautiful comic. i think the pacing works out great as well~!
whitneyandcompany
You guys are the reason I downloaded the web toon app, I look forward to every update
aliceapproved
Thank you for making such an inspirational and gorgeous comic!
Jess
Awww well it means so much to hear you guys say that
aliceapproved
I always look forward to your updates!
Superjustinbros
In that case, cya everyone!
aliceapproved
And yes, you're the reason I downloaded the web toon app, too!
saetje
oommmg @whitneyandcompany , thank you
Shen
im glad i got to read this story its so good so far and i cant wait to read more~
Jess
It’s been really humbling for us to put our work out there. But I am so incredibly touched right now
Superjustinbros
Glad to hear~
saetje
Thank you @Shen! I look forward to more of your comic as well! I'm glad you like it.
Shen
GOSH <3
saetje
Yeah everyone, thank you for coming and letting us know you thoughts It has meant the WORLD to us
aliceapproved
You guys are amazing and I love your work
Tenor | Shinavar
Thank you for signing up so we could disect it /shot
RebelVampire
COMIC TEA PARTY- THURSDAY BOOK CLUB END!
Sadly, this wraps up this week’s Thursday Book Club chat for now. Thank you so much to everyone for reading and joining us! We want to give a special thank you to Tracy MacLauchlan & Yesenia Carrero, as well, for making Gemini Journey. If you liked the comic, make sure to support Tracy MacLauchlan & Yesenia Carrero’s efforts however you’re able to~!
Read and Comment: http://geminijourney.com/
Donate via Paypal.me: https://www.paypal.me/YeseniaCarrero
Tracy’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/saetje
Yesenia’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/Demongemini6
Comic Tea Party- Thursday Book Club
Next week’s Thursday Book Club will be about The Hunter of Fenaur by CalimonGraal. For participants, you have the next week to read as much of the comic as you would like~! We hope to see you on Thursday, September 20th, from 5PM to 7PM PDT for the chat in #thursday_bookclub!
Comic’s Main Site: http://hunter.fenauriverse.moe/
Comic’s Tapas Mirror: https://tapas.io/series/the-hunter-of-fenaur
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