#horses in film and media | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

theprissythumbelina · 3 months

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So you want to write about horses.

Specifically, you want to write about horses in your medieval-inspired fantasy novel, rpg, or daydream fantasy. Knights in shinning armor on noble steeds, damsels in distress(or not!) on fine prancing mount, or an evil sorcerer cackling on a fierce charger above your poor tandem MCs.

Whatever it is you're imagining, a medieval horse appears. But you know nothing about horses. I can help.

(If you would like to begin with my first basic Basics post, start here)

^ When thinking knight, you're probably imagining a horse like this.

Preface: When talking about fiction, there is always a question of historical accuracy. That is wholly up to you. But you will at least, after reading this, know more of the historical fact involving horses, and certainly know about some of the more commonly-complained about fallacies involving horses in media.

Now, the above still is from the film Ladyhawke (1985), which is often credited for popularizing the Friesian breed in the United States. I can almost guarantee you have see a Friesian in a film or on TV. The recent series Shadow and Bone had a central character ride a Friesian in one episode. They epitomize the romantic nobility and grace of knights. Except they don't.

The horse you see above came into existence in 1879, primarily as a harness and agricultural use horse. Horses known as Friesian horses have existed since the 11th century, but those horses were completely different from the breed created in the 19th century. The modern Friesian is a trotting breed, made to pull carriages and look beautiful doing it. They have a long back, short neck, and due to inbreeding, a host of nasty genetic problems including dwarfism, aortic rupture, hydrocephalus, and megaesophagus.

However, breeds that trace ancestry back to beyond the middle ages do exist, and they have been breed to look much the same for generations. Introducing:

The Barb/Berber Horse

^Kinda just looks like A Horse™

The Barb comes from North Africa, and was spread into Europe through the Muslim conquest of Spain, where the breed mixed with the native Andalusian breed to create the Spanish Jennet, which is possibly the most widely successful horse breed in all of history. The Jennet is currently extinct*, but due to its durability, it was the horse used by the Spanish AND the British to invade the Americas, and descendants of the Jennet survive in local breeds from Argentina to Canada.

*a revitalization breed does exist of the same name

The Andalusian/Lusitano/Pure Raza Espanol

^The true Fabio of horses, known for thick flowing locks and sweet dispositions

Possibly the horse that most strongly resembles the ancient knighly horse, this noble creature used to be the preferred horse of film, before the Friesian rise in popularity. Horses of Spanish bloodlines are Andalusian, horses of Portuguese bloodlines are Lusitano, but the characteristics of both breeds are nearly identical. They are also known for a fancy 'high stepping' movement, in which they raise their knees higher than other breeds naturally.

The Arabian

^Note the narrow, 'dished' face and raised tail, breed characteristics

The ancient horse of the desert, made famous through books such as The Black Stallion, King of the Wind, and films such as Hildago. These horses are known for their stamina and intelligence, and were traditionally used as war horses by the desert tribes of the Arabian Peninsula. The Arabian has descendants in almost all modern breeds, as it is used to add strength and stamina to the original stock, despite being a relatively small horse. During the Napoleonic wars, this horse became the prized war horse of Europe as well, with Napoleon himself preferring to ride Arabians into battle.

The Mongolian Horse

^Thick head, thick body, this horse is made to survive winter on the steppes

Introduced to Europe from the Hunnic invasions that ended the rule of Rome, the Mongolian horse is made to survive, thrive, and run in harsh cold weather. This horse allowed Ghengis Khan and his soldiers to conqure one of the largest empires to ever exist, from Korea to Poland. This compact horse would have mixed with the native stock of Russian, Eastern European, and Germanic tribes to help create the ancient northern horses, resulting in a thicker breed of horse in the north, and a lighter breed of horse in the south of Europe. Modern-day pony breeds such as the Exmoor, Fjord, Icelandic, and other have been found to have genetic ties to the Mongolian horse.

These horses do not exactly look like the modern image of knights on massive horses, but it is useful to remember that 1. people back then were a lot smaller and 2. horses back then were a lot smaller. Of course, there were hundreds of other local breeds during the middle ages, but many have been modernized and become today's sport, work, or pleasure horses.

During the middle ages, horses were not actually defined by breed. They were defined by the work the horse was suited and trained to preform. There were five main types of medieval horses.

The Destrier

Also called The Great Horse for its size, strength, and price, this horse was the renown mount of knights and kings in battle. These horses were highly trained for battle, and could be taught to do such things as striking out at soldiers in front, kicking at soldiers from the back, and even leaping all four feet in the air to protect it's rider. They would wear the most armor, and these horses would likely be closest in appearance to the modern Andalusian.

^Ornate heavy armor on a model horse. This armor was made for a horse not much more than 15hh, what today would be a small horse.

The Courser/The Charger

A lighter horse than the destrier, the courser is also a warhorse, highly trained and well-bred, but a little less expensive. A knight might not be able to afford a destrier, especially as a minor knight, but every knight should have a courser. The Spanish Jennet is the epitome of the medieval courser, and in fact was the horse used by Richard II. According to Shakespeare, the horse's name was White Surrey, although other sources claim the horse was Roan Barbary, and was a Barb or Berber horse*.

*Bought from Spain and likely a cross of Spanish and African blood, so a Jennet. But Jennet was also a classification of a horse type in those days, so, sources are muddled.

The Rouncey

The 'average' horse of the time, this horse was used mainly for riding, but could sometimes be ridden into battle if trained properly, and were the preferred horse for lower-class fighters such as archers or men-at-arms. As it described a riding horse, these horses came in all shapes and sizes, from all lineages, and in all colors. In peacetime they could be used to draw carriages or work fields. A proud and expensive destrier would never be caught pulling a plow.

The Palfrey

A highly-bred, highly trained horse, this horse is a high quality riding horse known for a specific gait, called an ambling gait. This horse had a special pattern of moving its feet that gave the rider a considerably more comfortable ride than the traditional 4 gaited horse. After the middle ages, these horses almost disappeared, only to be recovered in the Americas in the form of 'gaited' horses such as the Paso Fino, the Rocky Mountain Horse, the Missouri Foxtrotter, and the Tennessee Walking Horse. The Icelandic horse has also retained the special Tölt gait that may* be the exact gait of medieval ambling horses.

*may, I am not a gaited horse expert.

The Packhorse

This describes any kind of horse, usually a rouncey, that is used not for riding but to carry supplies. Packhorses could also be mules, donkeys, and ponies, so long as they could carry weight for long miles. These were supply horses, carrying food, weapons, tents, whatever else may be needed.

Knights, Horses, and the Battlefield

^ What an incredible creature of power and nobility. The man is fine too, I guess.

Now, if you have seen the above scene, you have probably seen The Hollow Crown, a historical drama with a few late Medieval battle scenes. In these scenes, knight clashes against knight in a furious charge, leading to pitched battles on horseback. I'm not going to say that never happened, but by and large cavalry was directed against infantry, not other cavalry, or used to conduct maneuvers requiring speed and surprise, such as a charge, a circling maneuver, a bluff retreat and most importantly, to chase down routing enemy soldiers. A knight on horseback was most effective in close quarters against unmounted and surprised soldiers. Lances were the primary weapon, allowing a mounted warrior length to spear and batter down at enemies, and a sword was secondary, as it had a shorter length, and would be used if a mounted warrior was surrounded by infantry or in battle against another knight. Throughout the medieval period, horses sometimes were removed from the fight all together due to unfavorable land, and kept in reserve to either help the army flee or to chase down the fleeing enemy.

Hungry for more?

There are many sources out there to learn more about the medieval period and knights in particular. I would highly recommend that you not look at Medieval Times sources, if only because better sources are out there. I enjoy the videos produce by Jason Kingsley CBE (Yes, that Jason Kingsley CBE) on his Modern History TV YouTube Channel, and find them to be accurate as far as I'm aware.

^ Jason Kingsley and his horse Warlord, in costume. I've sent marriage proposals but I've not yet received a reply.

That's all for this post. I'll have more when I feel like it, and send me questions if you want to know more about specific things or need a writing question answered

Reblogs welcome and encouraged

@jacqueswriteblrlibrary for wider reach

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lamentablesbian · 2 years

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i’m really moved by how much Nope reinforces animal nature vs. human nature by insistently and powerfully humanizing black people. the way eye contact and seeing between OJ and Em becomes reassurance and connection between the two of them, while eye contact with Gordy and Jean Jacket is an attack, a challenge. Em and OJ are undeniably, vividly human, even if the media forgets it, even if they’re disregarded and dehumanized by the white people around them, it is their humanity that binds them— that marks them as each other’s and means they’re wholly unlike the animals that they’re working with and fighting against.

#just!!!!#the systemic animalization of black people in media #tied back to the HORSE being known but not the black jockey on its back #but peele so masterfully and REPEATEDLY shows that these characters are the most human in this entire film #and it is their humanity and love and trust for each other that saves them!!!#thinking thinking thinking thoughts #nope #myken talks

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hheininge-art · 1 year

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Ascension Valley | HHEININGE

https://society6.com/heatherheininge

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redlettermediathings · 1 month

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jorvikzelda · 1 year

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I started reading Lord of the Rings (bought Fellowship of the Ring like… last spring but never got around to starting) and I’d just like to say. Holy fuck what a slow book. You mean to tell me I’m over a hundred pages in and this man is only just leaving the Shire? Sign me up for MORE I love this shit. Tolkien said “I will take exactly as much time as I want to describe things and you will like it”. AND I DO

#i can already tell this is the sort of thing that’s going to be so good I’ll never recover from it #I’ve watched the movies like casually-in-the-background a couple times so I know the approximate plot #(they often run on TV somewhere around Christmas and New Year’s in Sweden so they’ve been on more than twice)#but there’s so much detail here that’s just… missed out on… in the films #Or I forgot about it lmfao #Either way loving the book detail #And also reading a book for the first time in months i told my mom id been reading today and she was like YOURE READING?!#It’s part of my social media healing process. Forcing me to like… sit down and take shit in #Used to DEVOUR books when I was younger #Just Kinda Stopped at some point (much like every other former gifted kid)#But it’s a well missed moment of escapism and calm and centering myself. meditative almost #I find lotr to be good also because it’s like… a little heavy. You can read a chapter and then sit with it for a little while #Im not quite reaching the heavy cliffhangers yet either #Each chapter feels pretty concluded #It’s a healthier reading method I feel than the ‘devour in one night then don’t read for 6 months’ thing I did in high school #the few times i DID sit down to read a book #God damn those are some long tags #z talks #not horse game #I feel so late to the party because I always see all these people enjoying lotr ;-; its so established and here am i….#but alas

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todayisafridaynight · 11 months

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still obsessed with how whenever you look up nakai you just get adachi front and center instead of arakawa or like. anyone he's actually played

#snap chats #im never mad about seeing adachi tho.... hello old man...#this isnt even to talk about the gorgeous cover picture they use for him. why the fuck is he on a horse looking like shakespeare #anyways i just got done watching a nakai movie- 'Hit Me Anyone One More Time'- i started a month back but forgot to resume #i was actually gonna post a cap from the movie since nakai was in a cute frilly apron and i was bouta make an arakawa joke #BUT let's just wait for me to draw it lbr LMAO #movie was cute if you were wondering... nakai plays as japan's prime minister Keisuke Kuroda who used to be a major dickwad #but after getting hit in the head with a rock he has a real Phineas Gage moment and does a whole 180 #it was lowkey real cute cause like. kuroda's just Confused 70% of the time but he's also really earnest and trying to be good #and he loves his wife. a lot. i mean his wife hated him for most of the movie but its ok they're cute at the end #this movies cute. weird to say about a movie about a politician but its true #since im weening off my tsutsumi binge im legally allowed to say its funny how they both played men named keisuke #it's really not common that i see names repeated- like in american films its common to run into 'bills' and 'toms' and that sort of thing #but its rare that i see a name pop up more than once in jp media. i mean unless it's sega and 'makoto' then jesus fucking christ ENOUGH #THATS ENOUGH MAKOTOS #anyway im going to bed. bye

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jinx-you-owe-me · 2 months

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ive gone through so many stages of grief with dfk 2023 and now ive arrived at "What If It Was Good"

#das fliegende klassenzimmer #das fliegende klassenzimmer 2023 #dfk #mine #hear me out #when you spend a lot of time with a piece of media you kind of form a bond with it #dfk 2023 is a wild horse that ive found in the desert #and im leading it back to civilization #look what you could be. you could be well nourished and full of life #i lowkey want to make up my own version of this film #in which all aspects get adequate room #it could be good if they actually explored the things they brought up

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cool-abed-filmz · 2 years

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look at them,, the autistic trio /hc

#nope film #jordan peele #headcanons #no one :#me watching any peice of media :#OOOOOO YOU WILL BE AUTISTIC YOU ARE AUTISTIC NOW #evidence ? because i said so #but also #oj is very quite #definitely like semi nonverbal #related when he was avoiding eye contact with the crew at the beginning and was very nervous and unsure what to say for the meeting #although that is definitely a metaphor for how your not supposed to look at jean jacket aka the spectical in the eye #the spectial in that case being all the camera crew / hollywood #i love em so much #at a young age her spin was definitely horses due to her being v e r y upset when her dad #had oj tame jean jacket instead of her #and once that rejection kicked in she sidelined horses and became more interested in acting #i mean the girl literally memorized her fathers speech for safety meeting on set WORD FOR WORD #idk man angel just reads as autistic to me #his spin is 100% aliens and the paranormal #and of course technology #very obvious #oj haywood #em haywood #angel torres #owen rambles #autistic headcanon #edit : OJ not looking at the crew who was literally mostly white is definitely related to him as a black man being uncomfortable around #white people i just wanted to add this on cuz it’s been a while since #i made this post and i’ve had more time to think about it and see other opinions on it

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theheadlessgroom · 7 months

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@beatingheart-bride

"I don't know quite yet what he'll do," Dorian admitted with a small shrug. "I've told him that he has a place in our home and always will, but that he doesn't have to be a butler if he doesn't want to be. He's appreciated the offer, but he hasn't told me just what his plan is yet."

Still, he couldn't help but smile, resting his head against his hand as he commented, "I'm so glad he's coming with us. I...I want him to stay a part of my life, and I...I want him to be a part of the lives of any children Elizabeth and I have together. He is my family, and I want to treat him as such."

For once, Beau wouldn't have the task of essentially raising a child (as he largely had to do, given the absence of the Gracey parents, often leaving the child-rearing to the staff while they went about their day), wouldn't have to play the role of parent and pedagogue, but could instead be what he largely was to Dorian in his youth-a doting uncle. Out of all the staff at Gracey Manor, Beau was the one who cut his young charge the most slack, letting him out of his lessons a little earlier, willing to let him indulge in sweets and games when his parents weren't looking, as well as treating him not just as his charge and pupil, but as a young friend, who he fondly watched grow up. As such, Dorian quite liked the idea of Beau getting to do the same with his children, who too would no doubt look upon him fondly as "Uncle Beau"-only this time, they wouldn't be reprimanded for addressing him as such.

"And, of course, any children Lizzie and I have will have their grandmother as well," he grinned, adding, "I do believe Mrs. Henshaw is not only giddy at the idea of having a son-in-law, but also having a grandchild to spoil. Lizzie's told me she's a little apprehensive about moving, she's lived in Louisiana all her life, but...she's also excited about her family growing."

It had just been Mrs. Lena Henshaw and her daughter for a lot of years, ever since Mr. Henshaw's death in a farm accident on the Gracey property when Elizabeth was five. It was something else the elder Henshaw and Mrs. June Pace were able to bond over: Louisiana natives, looked down on as working widows, who still loved and missed their husbands, and did all they could to support their beloved children.

#((it's really nice-especially since 'metropolis' was edited without director fritz lang's permission))#((by american channing pollock who thought the film was too cerebral and heavy for u.s. audiences))#((and cut huge swathes of the film as a result; turning it into a muddled mess!))#((again; some of the footage was just too damaged to be restored and so the little gap is filled in))#((by a title card explaining what happened; but still; it's wonderful to see it near-fully restored!))#((and it's true; lost media does take a certain amount of luck; and it often seems to show up))#((in the most unexpected ways and in the most unusual places; and i think))#((if 'london after midnight' is found; i think it'll be very much a surprise))#((found in a VERY unusual place!))#((and yup; a little more of theda bara's 'cleopatra' has been recovered!))#((now there's another film that's been highly sought after and feared almost entirely lost))#((save for a scant few seconds! the newly-recovered footage isn't a huge amount))#((in terms of length; it's not like we have half the movie; but i'm not about to look a gift horse in the mouth))#((the fact that more has been found at all is HUGE!))#outofhatboxes #beatingheart-bride #V:Days of Future Past

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dracolunae · 1 year

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I hate growing up with German television sometimes because it makes it so much harder to find obscure animated shows and movies from your childhood

Bonus points for frequently having extremely vivid and elaborate dreams that make it even harder to tell what part of your memory was real or a dream

#lunar lullabies #i have a chronic need to revisit things from my childhood so I have evidence they actually happened #and there are at least 3 pieces of media that drive me insane trying to find them #one of them I finally found a copy of #the other 2 I haven’t even found evidence they exist #one was about a guy and his horse and I think they both had like golden hair #and if the hair was cut they’d lose their superhuman strength #which I think is real because I remember my dad commenting on it #but the other i’m not sure is real #it was about some cute creatures living in a nature filled environment #and at some point there’s something about a book that when opened poured out a tar like black substance #that drowned most of the area #legit no clue if that one was an elaborate nightmare my brain made up or an actual film

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darkmovies · 1 year

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#Brian Taylor #Christopher Golden #Dark Horse Entertainment #film #Hellboy The Crooked Man #Mike Mignola #Millennium Media #film d'horreur #cinéma #news #actualité #acteurs #filmmaking

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theprissythumbelina · 5 months

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Hello hello! Arch here, with yet more Horse-Queries:

One thing I've always been a tad confused by is the "pace" at which a horse would be moving at in any given situation. When I imagine, say, a large troop of horses moving from one point to another, I usually envision them all moving at a 'gallop' (I realise that's probably the wrong vocabulary to describe that sort of fast pace, so I'd welcome a correction!). But I recall some sources pretty much refuting that. So, I guess my question is: if you're expecting to move large distances without too much impetus for speed, how much faster than a walking person would a horse with rider and some equipment be able to move?

I'm going to answer your question, but I'm also going to teach you about paces because this confuses a lot of people in my experience. If you want to skip to the direct answer, I'll mark it with ***.

What is a horse's 'pace'. So horses have something called a stride, which is the distance it takes for all four feet to hit the ground once. A pace is the speed of a stride. So a faster pace means the feet are moving further and hitting the ground more often in a certain amount of time. That's the simple part.

Horses also have gaits, which are the patterns in which their feet move. The normal horse has four, the walk, the trot, the canter, and the gallop. For some reason, some American cowboys call a canter a gallop? No clue, but the fact is that canter and gallop are different because the pattern of footfalls is different. A canter is also referred to as a lope in Western riding. A visual is below. (please ignore the misspelling, is it not canker, its canter, this was the best image i found of all four gaits together)

As can be seen, a walk is a four beat gait, with each foot hitting the ground not in concert with any other foot. The trot(also called a jog in British English) is a two beat gait, with diagonal pairs moving at the same time. A canter is a three beat gait, with one hind leg and one front leg moving in concert, and the other front and hind moving separately. The gallop is a four beat gait, with a moment of suspension.

When it comes to riding horses over distance, these patterns are very important. The gallop is the fastest gait, but it requires a huge amount of energy due to only one leg hitting the ground at a time. This puts enormous stress on the body. Racehorses have shattered legs while racing due to having the entire body weight and stress on one single foot. No horse can maintain a gallop for more than a few minutes, even top racers.

The canter is less strenuous, but it is still difficult and potentially dangerous to maintain for long periods of time, due to the shifting of balance from foot to foot. The walk, of course, is the easiest gait to maintain over long distances, and most horses can regain stamina at the walk. But the best gait for long distances (for normal horses, I'll get to that) is the trot. Due to the diagonal pairs, a trot is the most stable and efficient gait, requiring the least amount of balance control, and also benefiting from the hind legs usually stepping in the exact foot print of the front legs. The trot averages 8 mph, or about 12.9 km/h. In comparison, a human walk is about 3 mph or 5.1 km/h.

***A horse and rider in good condition, over relatively flat ground at a trot, would be over twice as fast as a human walking.

But, here's the kicker, not every horse has only four gaits. Many breeds of horse, and many more that have gone extinct since industrialization, had five or six gaits. These are referred to in modern times as gaited horses. These special gaits were genetically inherited, and cannot be trained. A horse is either born with extra gaits or not.

Some additional gaits are: the amble, the pace, the sobreandando, the Tölt, the running walk, the foxtrot, the rack, and many more.

These are pertinent to the question because some of these gaits, in particular the Tölt, can be performed at speeds reaching those of a canter. Now, I am not an expert in gaited horses, but the Tölt, the foxtrot, and the running walk were all breed specifically for covering large distances quickly and comfortably. However, I cannot find a source I trust for how long these paces can be maintained at top speed. Due to the smoothness of the gaits, I would hazard a guess that it would be as far, if not further, than a trot, but that is my own guesstimate.

A historical anecdote, during medieval warfare, ambling horses were often used as riding horses to reach a battle site, where the courser or destrier would then be mounted and put into use. Centuries later, the ambling Tennessee Walking Horse and Missouri Foxtrotter were both used in the American South and West for long distance travel over rocky and mountainous terrain, and are known for being incredibly comfortable, as well as beautiful horses.

This became possibly my longest ever post, but I believe I answered your question and then some. Thank you for letting me go full horse-obsessed nerd once again!

#horses #writeblr reference #writing horses #if you or someone you know has questions about horses related things #never fear #I'm here #and I will tell you everything you never knew you didn't want to know #Don't even get me started on horses in film and media #I have references

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sandersstudies · 1 year

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It’s so weird that we’re rapidly approaching an era of 100-year-old pop culture in a new way. Like if you were a 90s kid there was no such thing as a 100-year-old movie (or at least, not one more complex than “horse runs” or “the arrival of a train).

We have lots of songs that are over a hundred years old, but few recordings of them that are intelligible. The oldest popular genre music goes back to about the 30’s.

Even musicals! Theater is obviously an ancient art but the musicals in the modern sense we imagine them (in which speech and song are combined and both progress the plot) weren’t popularized until relatively recently.

Point is when my mom was growing up she was not exploring media (except for books) that was 100+ years old. When I was growing up at the turn of the century, I wasn’t either. But the crazy thing is that my kids will.

If I were to have a kid in 2023, here are some things that will be 100 before they turn 18 and will likely still be culturally relevant.

The Wizard of Oz (film)

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (film)

Fantasia

Anything Goes (musical)

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer (the song and associated character, not the movie)

Mickey and Minnie Mouse and many associated characters

Superman and Batman (the characters)

Bugs Bunny and many associated characters

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avaf00rdxx · 3 months

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media day

Leah Williamson x Reader

For everyone that rages at it I’m gonna check it aight

—————————-

“whats today” asked Leah’s strong Milton Keynes accent behind a digital film camera. You looked up and smiled at her camera.

“It’s media day!” You softly said, voice still horse, still half asleep and leaning at the kitchen bench with your girlfriend, she was going to put a bunch of captured videos from every six months on a video for her instagram. It was a new goal of hers. The idea made your heart melt.

Some days she would just set it up as you two spent time together. If you were travelling and watching the sunset on the beach with Leah as an example, she would set the camera up behind the two of you cuddling and looking out.

Other times she would film you and your friends being silly in the gym, or videos of you and your dogs.

Later, Leah drove the two of you to the training grounds. Both with hair neat and light makeup on, ready to film some media.

Most of you girls didn’t mind these days, some hated, but you found it so much fun. Leah filmed you as you skipped through the entrance and down the hauls, the blonde chuckling behind you. You turned around and winked for the camera before you ran into Beth and Steph coming up the other way,

“Hello!” Beth said hugging you. You hugged her tightly before doing the same to Steph.

“You’re after Caitlin and Jen. You have to do another game for a video this one is more fun than the last one trust me” Beth said to you two, letting you know what the first media duty was, also reminding you at how bad you were at the last challenge you filmed was.

When you stepped into the area with many cameras and back drops for shoots set up, you girlfriend was immediately peeled away from you to go take some photos in the new training tracksuit set. Claiming they didn’t have enough content for the particular set.

You were sitting on one of the lounges scrolling through instagram as you noticed Jen come up to you with a microphone “y/n!” The tall brunette exclaimed. “Mind if I sit?” She asked pointing to the spot on the couch next to you.

“Of course Jenny” you smiled moving your legs that were laying there, before putting them back on top of Jen’s lap so they could lay there once again.

“Oh ok” Jen and you giggled as you relaxed back into the couch with you legs resting over her lap. “Do you mind if I ask you a few questions?”

“Hit me” you said smiling at the camera

“I went over to grab a cookie from the snack table. And Caitlin foord had informed me that you had eaten the entire bowl of cookies? Can you confirm or deny?” She asked you

“What!” You laughed. “Caitlin not fair!” You yelled across the indoor area as the girl poked her tongue at you. “Deny. She ate most of them I had two!” You said looking into the camera, getting louder at the last part so the brunette across the room could hear.

“Rumour confirmed. Now who do you think looks the best in the new home kit?” Jen said smirking, motioning towards her chest as she was wearing the said kit.

“I think it really suits me im not gonna lie…..” you grinned “But best might have to be Jen Beattie” you shrugged, you high-fived her before you noticed a blonde with her arms folded glaring at both of you.

“I didn’t see you come through the door” you smiled at Leah, patting the spot next to you so she could sit.

“Jen best dressed in home kit?” She questioned towards the camera.

“Yes-“ Jen said proudly

“No! It’s a tie!” You grinned

“Mm sure” Leah said

“Ok one final question and Leah you can answer this too. Any pre game traditions you have together? Like as a couple?”

“Well Leah Can’t cook so I end up cooking pasta. I feel like when you ask a footballer their night-before meal they all say this. But it’s seriously you know, good carbs for the following game day” you said into your microphone to Jen and the Camera

“I can cook some things” Leah said

“Let’s be real here Leah, I don’t even live with you and I know this” Jen laughed, making Leah pout cutely at the camera

“You make great weetabix darling” you said rubbing her shoulder in sympathy causing her to upside-down smile at you.

“And there you have it let’s find our next guest” Jen’s voice trailed off, leaving the couch as the camera man followed her and the mic.

Leah pulled you into her embrace on the couch, you now completely collapsed on top of her. “I’m already tired” your girlfriend huffed below you.

“let’s get you a coffee I was about to get one” you said getting up to head towards the snack table containing a coffee machine just to your luck.

“Yuck no thanks” said the non-coffee drinker.

———————

“Hi im Y/n y/l/n”

“And I am Leah Williamson”

“This is Arsenal’s Name Three game, where we are going to be asked to name three of a category or something like that in under 5 seconds” you shrugged smiling wide

“Here we go” Leah said rubbing her palms together

“Name Three dog breeds. Go” you asked with cardboard game cards in your hand

“Ok um Husky, Border Collie and erm Labrador” she smiled proud of getting it right in 4 seconds.

“Nice work” you smiled, adjusting your position on your seat as Leah read her card.

“Name three Arsenal men’s players from the 2021/2022 season!”

“Um Martinelli, Tomiyaso, Saka!” You clapped after quickly finishing “did I have to say full names?” You asked the people behind the camera who shook their heads.

“Dang that was quick good job sweets. Okay my turn now I’m gonna beat your time” Leah said.

“Oh god good luck. Three countries that speak Spanish off you go” you read as her 5 seconds started

“Shit um Spain, El Salvador and”

“1..” you counted down

“Mexico” she smiled proudly finishing her answer in less than a second. “That was an easier question than you think”

“I’m shit at Geography” you shrugged to the camera

“Ok y/l/n your second is name three shades of red” she smiled reading, knowing you most likely wouldn’t get this.

“Is red one-“ you questioned

“Time starts go!”

“I don’t know any! Um plain red and… oh pink is one right” you exclaimed

“Bowbow! Times up. And I don’t think Plain red counts, nor pink” she laughed

“Surely” you mumbled crossing you arms. The camera started recording as you were given the next card. “For your final question Leah, three fake blondes on the Arsenal team” you giggled reading out your card.

“Oh my god that’s funny um shit Beth, Laura and also oh wait no she’s not…and Chloe!”

“Time! You didn’t get the last one in time!” You argued

“I so did!” She exclaimed

“Nope”

“I did but whatever then you just cannot handle losing” she said, receiving a glare from you. “Ok for the final question of today for lucky y/n here. Name three country songs starting with L”

“What! Not fair”

“Ready?”

“Absolutely not!

“Okay three two one start!” She exclaimed, studying your face as your face scrunched up in thought.

“Love you anyway Luke combs, lovin on you and like a wrecking ball by Eric Church” you yelled jumping up as you got them “yes! Got em!” You yelled excitedly you and Leah both laughed as you settled behind Leah’s back arms around her neck in a hug, with Leah bringing her hands up to your arms as you recorded the outro.

“I think we have a clear winner-“

“It was a tie missy” you said slightly whacking her head. “Anyways tune into our sold out game this weekend against Manchester United at Arsenal.com and Sky News sports. Check out our socials for further details” you smiled.

“See you next time” Leah giggled with her thumbs up, slightly cringing at it.

“Thanks ladies was brilliant” said one of the girls behind the camera, letting you now go back to where the rest of the girls were.

——————

Media days isn’t just snapping a few cute pics and playing a fun game. It was a little bit more effort and just loads of hours and hours of sitting and waiting to be called up to take pictures or film something for social media.

“What does selling out the emirates mean to me? Um it just feels surreal. As a child I remember coming to the emirates to watch Chelsea and Arsenal play, as a child when your in places like that with just tens of thousands of people it doesn’t feel real and it’s just so overwhelming. All of those people there to watch one game of silly football I would think” you laughed “but just wow 60,000 what a number I guess and it will never hit me that me and the girls have achieved this, if you told me this was happening 12 months ago I would have probably laughed. Especially telling little me sitting there at a sold out emirates in 2005, that I would be on that pitch with the same scenario just blows my mind” you smiled as you put down the phone you were asked to share your thoughts on the sold out game on.

“Sorry that was a bit of a ramble there” you said shyly, handing the phone back to the media manager.

“Absolutely not. That was so good thanks for doing that” she smiled at you before you went back to where you could see Lia, Leah and Kim all sitting down on the fake grass inside.

“Hello kimmy” you said resting your chin on her shoulder, before your eyes fell on a fast asleep Leah laying on Lia’s leg, phone in hand but dead asleep”

“Oh hello” Kim laughed hugging you back “this one was a bit tired” she pointed to your girlfriend

“Yeah she didn’t get the best sleep” you sighed going to sit next to Leah passed out on the floor.

Lia and Kim both scrunching up their faces in disgust at your response. “ no no not like that freaks. She was up playing piano again” you defended, groaning at the last part.

“Poor you. When you were away and she asked me to come over while she practised, she was up for hours” Lia laughed.

“Every night when I’ll tell her I’m going to bed, usually that implies she will too and she hops up and follows me. But lately she just says ‘night!’ and stays up playing for hours” you said, Kim smiling in amusement at the sleepy girl, before a strong Irish voice was heard.

“Here’s the sleepy girl!” Katie shoved the camera at Leah’s sleepy state passed out next to you. “And the wag!” she said now putting the camera in your face, you following your eyes at her continuous joke.

You were injured for one of your England games and were in the stands without being on the pitch with the English girls, an article released from the game called you ‘Leah’s Wag’, Katie found it hilarious and now called you ‘wag’ a lot.

“Is that Leah’s camera” you smiled up at the brunette, camera still in your face.

“You know it chick” Katie said “give me an update on what’s happening!” She said motioning for you to talk to her ‘vlog’

“Umm im ready to be told i can go home” you said sweetly, genuinely waiting to get told by the staff all was good and we could leave.

“Same here” Katie grinned wide panning the camera to her face. “Ooh!” Katie said skipping off with the camera after she found Jen making a TikTok with Beth.

Now you and Leah were left together laying on the ground, her still asleep, you thought, as her arms reached out in a stretch. “Hi baby” you said sweetly kissing her check, then her nose, then her lips.

“How long did I sleep for” she asked looking around slightly.

“No idea. Not too long I don’t think”

“Sorry about that” she said snuggling into your legs

“Don’t apologise. We should be able to leave soon. Actually I’m just gonna ask. I can’t wait any longer seriously” you said before getting up to find one of the media girls Ryhanna who was sitting down editing something on a computer. She said it was supposed to finish at 2, but we should be find to leave now.

“I’ll check hang on” she said getting up to ask someone

“Thank you” you said gratefully before walking over to the small drinking tap, filling up your water bottle which was next to it so you could give some to Leah.

“Yep you and Leah are all good to go!” She yelled from a bit away “see you guys tomorrow”

“Thank you so much. See you then!” You said, now happily skipping back. “We can go now!” You hummed, reaching your hands out to Leah so you can pull her up.

She smiled contently and happily letting you pull her up from the ground. You hugged some of the girls goodbye, who were now curious and jealous as to when they could leave.

“After you” Leah said holding the door open which led to the parking lot out the front. You gave her a sweet look and reached for her hand as you walked to the car together.

“Let’s get some sleep” she said leaning on your shoulder as you walked.

“It’s barely five” you laughed at your tired girlfriend. “It’s all that piano practise you stay up to do”

“Yeah yeah” she said walking to the drivers seat

“No missy your gonna fall asleep on the road let me drive. You took her hand in yours, pulling her away from the handle and also grabbing the keys from her hand.

“Off you go my passenger princess” you tapped her butt to shoo her away to the passenger seat

“No you’re my passenger princess” she said with warm cheeks when you both buckled your seat belts. Your reached for her hand once you made it onto the main road, interlocking fingers as you gently kissed hers.

“Smile your on camera” she exclaimed as you slowly turned your head to her and the camera, your girlfriend filming the entire sweet moment, lightly pulling your tongue out at it before facing back at the road in front of you, pecking all of her fingers again as she giggled like a small girl next to you.

#woso #arsenal women #leah williamson x reader #leah williamson imagine #leah williamson #arsenal x reader #arsenal wfc #woso x reader #woso imagine #woso community

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cleolinda · 7 months

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The Scariest Movie I Ever Saw in a Theater: The Ring

I'll tell you up front that the story I'm going to tell you is about "The Ring (2002)," in the sense that it is about The Ring in the year 2002.

See, I don't know what The Scariest Movie Ever is. A quick google says that the consensus is The Exorcist (I haven't seen it, because I never felt like scheduling a day to freak myself the entire fuck out). But horror is specific, and not just to a person, but to a time and place, even. When I saw The Shining as a teenager in a well-lit living room with other people, I didn't even really flinch, but I bet it would play very differently to me now. I don’t think The Ring is at the top of anyone’s list, but twenty years ago, I had a personal interest in it—at the time, I was running a dinky little Geocities site devoted to movie news. Links curated and compiled from all the other, bigger sites I followed—basically, it was the linkspam format I have used on multiple platforms, including here on Sundays. And so, as someone who followed theatrical releases pretty closely for two or three years, I saw the trailer for The Ring, and I immediately knew it was going to be huge.

To locate you in time, this was just after three self-satirizing Scream movies and the Overcomplicated Serial Killer films of the '90s. The Ring was something completely different: chill aqua-blue color grading a good 5-6 years before Twilight; a mournful Hans Zimmer score; no jokes, no quips; and a slow, inexorable sense of doom. Grief, even, given that the movie begins with the death of the main character's niece. What immediately struck me about the first trailer was 1) the melancholy of it, and 2) how much it doesn't explain. Onscreen, you get the title cards,

THERE IS A VIDEOTAPE IF YOU WATCH IT SEVEN DAYS LATER YOU DIE

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Concise! Understandable! A woman (Naomi Watts) is freaking out upon discovering that her young son has just watched it! Admirable job setting up the premise and the stakes of this entire movie in thirty seconds flat, without even any dialogue. That's all you need to know, and thus, the remaining minute of the trailer can do whatever it wants, and what it wants to do is be fucking weird. Echoing voices, TV static, a closeup of a horse's eye, ladders, a girl with dark hair, people reacting to things we don't see, drippy doorknobs, rain. Characters don't give us the whole plot in convenient soundbites of dialogue (like they do in a later trailer); we just hear lines, overlapping, murmured out of context—

did you see it in your head? she talks to you... leading you somewhere... showing you the horses... you saw it. did you see it in your head? she shows me things. Everyone suffers.

That you saw it has lived in my head ever since, and not once have I charged it rent. But the "best" part is Naomi Watts screaming at the end, because you don't hear her voice; you only hear this heartless telephonic beeeeeeep. It's 2002 and I'm watching this trailer, thinking, I have no idea what the fuck I just saw. This is going to be huge.

And it was, to the tune of $249 million on a $48M budget.

At risk of recapping what you might already know, Ringu, aka Ring, is a media franchise that spiraled out from a trio of Koji Suzuki novels into Hideo Nakata's film Ringu (1998), a landmark of Japanese horror, plus several other movies, some TV series, many comics, and even a couple of video games. The overarching story is about a murdered girl/vengeful ghost named Sadako Yamamura whose rage and pain have created a cursed video tape, you watch it and you die unless you pass the tape around like a virus, seven daaaaays, etc.

The "ring" in question is the rim of a well. Keep that well in mind.

The movie I saw is the U.S. remake, which itself had two sequels. (The iconic Sadako is now named Samara Morgan. Keep her in mind, too.) Director Gore Verbinski moved from The Ring to Pirates of the the Caribbean (!), and so Hideo Nakata himself would direct The Ring Two. I... honestly have only seen the first one. And I was right, it was huge, and it kicked off the American J-Horror Remake genre, for better or worse. But what gets forgotten about The Ring is its marketing campaign, which I followed pretty closely for my doofy little news site.

It was inspired.

The story of The Ring is partly the story of the sea change in the media landscape—how we watch movies. And the story of its marketing is a picture of the very last years before social media changed the wilderness of the internet into something that feels so big, like a billion people could see anything we say, and yet so small—only a tame handful of places to say it, owned by three or four companies, and corraled by algorithms.

Back around 1997-1998 or so, I worked at a video store (Movie Gallery, where the hits were there then, guaranteed) for about a year and a half. By the time I left, we had started adding DVDs to the VHS tapes on the shelves, but we hadn't replaced the entire stock. Video stores might have transitioned fully to DVD by 2002, I'm not sure, but people still commonly had both VCRs and DVD players in their homes. And I remember that The Ring was sold in both formats when it eventually hit home video. Which is to say—you know the analog horror genre today? Marble Hornets, Local 58, The Mandela Catalogue?

Analog horror is commonly characterized by low-fidelity graphics, cryptic messages, and visual styles reminiscent of late 20th-century television and analog recordings. This is done to match the setting, as analog horror works are typically set between the 1960s and 1990s. The name "analog horror" comes from the genre's aesthetic incorporation of elements related to analog electronics, such as analog television and VHS, the latter being an analog method of recording video.

Okay, but this is just what home media was like, and 2002 was at the very tail end of that—boxy black VHS tapes that degraded with time and reuse were just how we lived. At the same time, I'd been using CDs for music since about 1991, and all our software installs came on CD-ROM discs; a "mixtape" by that time had shifted to mean a rewriteable CD rather than a cassette tape. In college, I—well, I'll plead the Fifth as to whether I downloaded mp3s via Napster, but I was also taping Mystery Science Theater 3000 on VHS over the weekends. It was Every Format Everywhere, All At Once, and we kept half a dozen kinds of players around for them. Here in 2023, we stream and download everything invisibly, unless we choose to engage in format nostalgia. (I've already run into the problem of Apple Music deleting songs I really liked, due to this or that licensing issue, because I was really only renting them.) The year The Ring hit theaters was the edge of a last shimmering gasp of physical media where iTunes had only come into being the year before, and iridescent discs were still mostly what we used, but cassettes, both video and audio, were still viable. And so, people did not think it was terribly weird when they started finding unlabeled VHS tapes on their windshields.

Movieweb, quoting TikTok user astro_nina:

"Their marketing strategy was essentially 'let's get this tape viewed by as many people as possible without these people being aware of what this is, sort of raising intrigue," she says. One way they achieved this was by airing the tape, which allegedly marks its viewers for death within seven days, as a commercial with no context. The video would air between late-night programming "with no words, no mention of a movie, for like a month...so people would run into it and it would just go on to the next thing, and people would be like, 'what the f--k is this?'"

I remember seeing the Cursed Video as an unexplained ad at least twice, by the way. That TikTok also indicates that DreamWorks straight-up sent copies of the tape to Hot Topic stores, as well as planting them under actual movie theater seats. While running my movie site, I heard at least one story of someone finding a tape on the sink counter of a restroom at a club. Did the marketing department actually plant tapes in bathrooms—or did a freaked-out recipient leave it there, hoping to dodge the "curse"?

(I haven't embedded the Cursed Video here, by the way—but I could have. If you'd like to see the American take on it, you can watch both the full version and the shorter variant that appeared in the movie itself. A text description of what the fuck you're even looking at is here [content note for both: blood, insects, animal death, body horror, and suicide by falling]. The original version from the Japanese film is shorter, and it's eerie rather than gruesome.)

BUT WAIT, THERE WAS MORE: DreamWorks had something of an alternate-reality campaign going with a handful of in-character websites. This was only a year after Warner Bros. ran the groundbreaking "The Beast" ARG for A.I.: Artificial Intelligence: "Ultimately, fifty websites with a total of about one thousand pages were created for the [A.I.] game." (I lurked in the Cloudmakers Yahoo group.) Marketing for The Ring did not go anywhere that in depth, nor did it need to; it was both a smaller film and a smaller story. I saw at least two “personal” websites (seemingly amateur and a little tacky, like my own), but the one I particularly remember was about someone who owned/trained horses? I'm not sure if it was meant to be the actual Anna Morgan character—Samara's mother—or maybe someone who had noticed that the Morgans' horses were disturbed? I'm not even sure anyone even remembers this but me. Reddit users dug up a few other archived websites, but they're about Sadako, the curse and/or videotape; they aren't as subtle or character-oriented as the site I remember. (Honestly, I wonder if weird shit like "What Scares Me" or "SEVEN DAYS TO LIVE" were made by fans rather than a marketing department, but who knows.)

[The “About” page from Seven Days to Live on the Internet Archive.]

[The entirety of An Open Letter on the Internet Archive. “UPDATE” is a now-blank pop-up. I would bet $5 that it was originally a pop-up of the cursed video.]

I need to point out here that Facebook did not exist in 2002. It would not exist for another two years, and Twitter wouldn't exist until 2006. Even MySpace was not a thing until the next year. I didn't start my Livejournal until October of 2003. What we had, for the most part, were independent forums and blogs. We also had Creepy Internet Fiction like "The Dionaea House" and "Ted the Caver"; their use of the blog format, of people out there seemingly living their lives until something fucked up went down, gave the stories the shape of reality. And it helped that these blogs had comment sections, sure—sometimes more story unfolded there—but for the most part, an author could "abandon" a blog, and you'd just find the story there via word of mouth. Like the Ring blogs I remember, it wouldn't seem strange if no one replied to you, whereas today, you'd have to hire a writer to sit on Twitter, or Reddit, or even Tumblr, and interact with people in character. Could you do something like The Ring's mysterious, weird-ass blogs today? Would anyone even notice?

So: It's 2002, my head is full of Alternate Reality and eerie images and you saw it, and I'm hype as hell to go out and see The Ring. I'm perfectly happy to go see movies by myself, so I went in the early afternoon (best time to get a good seat). The movie ended up being a sleeper hit, and the first weekend, the public was still sleeping on it, so there were only 7-8 other people in that theater, grouped in maybe two clusters. I was off in my own little pool of darkness in the upper right quadrant. Functionally, once the lights went down, I was alone.

Despite some middling reviews at the time, The Ring is something of a horror classic nowadays. If you want a scary movie this Spooky Season, check out The Ring. Or don't, because it nearly killed me.

We're at the last, I don't know, third of the movie? And Our Heroine has tracked down the origin of the Cursed Videotape to some creepy mountain motel or whatever. SPOILER, it turns out that it was built over the Cursed Well (everything in this movie is cursed) that Our Villain was thrown into—that's why Sadako/Samara is a vengeful wet murder ghost crawling out of TVs now. While investigating this decrepit hotel room, intrepid journalist Rachel and her, who is it, her ex-husband? her kid's dad, idk, discover the well under the creaky old floorboards. And then, wouldn't you know it,

NAOMI WATTS FALLS INTO THE WELL

NAOMI WATTS FALLS INTO THE FUCKING WELL

THAT'S WHERE SAMARA'S BODY IS

youtube

[The rather slapstick moment when Rachel falls into the well. Does not include what actually happens next.]

I go absolutely rigid in my seat. Naomi Watts is splashing around this dark-ass death swamp of a well and I know, with as much certainty as I have ever known anything in my life, that Samara is about to pop up in all her pasty, waterlogged glory. All the sad creepy dread, all the desperation to figure out what the fuck all that shit on the tape was and stop Samara from killing Rachel's son, all the horrible contorted victim faces, all the alternate reality I’ve been soaking in, it has all come to this. I have to leave the theater. I cannot be having with this. I have to be gone from this place. My legs do not work. I cannot feel them. I am frozen. I want nothing more in this life or any other to get up and leave this cavernous pitch-black room, and I cannot. I start praying for death. I want you to understand that I am not trying to be flippant or humorous. This is genuinely what went through my head. I was too scared to even think, "You know, you could just pray to pass out or for motion to return to your limbs or something." No, I sat there in The Ring thinking, Please for the love of all mercy just let me cease being.

You know that scene in Mulholland Drive (also starring Naomi Watts)? Winkie's diner and the EXCRUCIATING tension? It was a little like that, except I wasn't watching it, I was experiencing it, and Samara was my dirt monster out behind the diner.

Except that the jump scare didn't actually happen. I mean, yes, Rachel finds Samara's body down there, but—I don't remember exactly, please don't make me go watch it again to tell you what actually happens. It's played more sympathetically on Rachel's part, as I recall, and she and her ex get Samara's body out so that she (Samara) can have a proper burial.

And then it turns out that this is not the end of the movie. It turns out that Rachel has Fucked Up.

I think I was relatively okay through the rest of it, although the climax is Samara emerging from a TV in her full glitching swampy glory to scare [SPOILER] to death. I don't recall praying for death twice. There's a point when you're so exhausted from fear chemicals that you're like, yeah, this might as well happen. Bring it, Soggy. I did have a hard time prying myself out of that seat afterwards, though, and my mom says that when I got home, I had the classic thousand-yard stare. How was the movie?

"It was great," I said, and I meant it.

I've seen things that were objectively scarier (I watched much of The Haunting of Hill House from behind a pillow, to be honest), and it's not like I've never experienced fear in real life. But I respect when a movie that can make me feel so intensely, and there's something weirdly precious about the way horror is a safe roller coaster, as it's often been said. So I love telling the story about The Time The Ring Nearly Killed Me—a movie that actually made my body stop working—and I love thinking of how embedded in a specific time and place that movie was for me. The last gasp of VHS when the Cursed Videotape still seemed plausible; the way the internet was still wild and weird and free; where I was in my life, keeping up so avidly with all the movie news, and finding myself in such a little pool of darkness early one afternoon. It's the scariest movie I saw in a theater; that's the alchemy of circumstance.

#the ring #ringu #horror #first look on patreon #movies #long post #spooky season #halloween everyday #long post is long #gifs

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