#i am gatekeeping the super identity | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cock-holliday · 7 months

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Hey, I'm sorry if this is outside of your wheelhouse but you're one of my fav Butch bloggers and I wanted to get your honest opinion on it. I recently got an Instagram reel from a (white) Butch, yeehawllywood, shared on my feed which defined Butch as a Lesbian-exclusive gender identity and in a reply to a comment, that "Butch is to Lesbians what 2S is to the indigenous community".

Now I'm not Butch but I do have a cultural gender identity somewhat similar to 2S, and my partner is 2S herself. I think the comparison is somewhat offensive but since neither of us are Butch, I'd like a Butch Opinion on the whole thing so I'm not ignorant when I discuss how I disagree with it.

( the reel in question; I can't link comment replies but the comment it's attached too should show up near the top : www instagram com/reel/ CwHEbi0sCfK/ )

Oof, I am not two-spirit so I cannot speak to how offensive the comparison is but my understanding is that it would be pretty offensive and also at least fairly ignorant.

"Butch" as a term is not even woman-specific, as it was historically used in drag and ballroom scenes of all genders. But within sapphic spaces, it is neither lesbian-specific nor exclusively a gender identity. Butch can be used to describe someone masculine, it can describe queer masculinity, and it can be a gender. The beauty of butch is that it does not have hard borders--quite the opposite of two-spirit.

If anything, a term to compare to 2S is "stud," which is a descriptor/gender/gender modifier for Black masculinity which came about from gatekeeping of terms like butch over race and as a way to distinguish how Black masculinity has its own experiences separate from other mascs. Anyone who tells you that butch only belongs to X is a big liar, but Stud is a closed term that not anyone can claim.

"Butch" belongs to all genders, it belongs to all sexualities, and it describes a whole host of experiences of queer masculinity.

Here is a similar ask

Here is just the essay I Know What Butch is, which debunks all this (also included in the above ask)

The Butch Manual: text debunking the idea that butch is woman-specific

Literally any piece by Leslie Feinberg dunks on the idea that butch is woman-specific or cis-specific or woman-for-woman-only-specific

Stone Butch Blues

https://transgenderwarrior.org/

Other butch writers/speakers/authors who discuss butchness to look into:

Ivan Coyote

Jack Halberstam

S. Bear Bergman (author of I Know What Butch Is from Butch Is A Noun)

Kate Bornstein

Eli Erlick

Text/Video on this very issue

Another article on border fuzziness

Soooooo long story short--no that person is super incorrect.

Also thank you for the lovely compliment!

#ask #anon ask #butch

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cherry-velvet-skies · 1 year

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It is time for the finale of the Beatles Era Ratings series ❤ This series was so fun I don't want it to end lol

Episode 4: Paul McCharmly 😁 And as of now all four parts are available in my Masterlist if you haven't seen the others 🥰

Archie Comics Character (Pre-Beatles Era)

Tell me he doesn't look like a 50s/60s cartoon character

Simultaneously looks 18 years old and 8 years old this kid's a fucking wizard

He has the vibe of those people who seem super cool but talk to them for too long and they get real annoying real fast

4/10 his only skill is his seemingly endless inventory of cheesy pickup lines

Petulant Schoolboy (1962)

Resting Pout Face ™️

There is a certain level of entitlement radiating from this image but we don't have time to unpack all of that

Looks the same as practically every other kid his age but still thinks he's the best looking one

5/10 is cute until he opens his mouth

Undercover Ken Doll (1963-66)

His appearance has not changed since the beginning of the Beatles

Looks identical to his Beatles cartoon counterpart and no I'm not wrong

This man is one minor inconvenience away from throwing a full-blown tantrum

6/10 though I'd be lying if I said I didn't find him the least bit adorable

Teen Caught With Fake ID (1967)

Never have I seen a real mustache look so fake in my entire life

When people who work at convenience stores tell stories of underage people who come in trying to buy alcohol, this is the people that come in

He's 25 and he looks 15 I hate it here

3/10 maybe next time don't let your LSD trip determine your facial hair pattern

Understandably Conceited (1968)

Very similar to Undercover Ken Doll but there is something different here. Something...better

Beautiful and he knows it

His eyelashes are longer than mine what the hell am I doing wrong

9/10 he's a 9 but he gatekeeps his skincare routine

McBeardy (1969-70)

Jesus Christ do I even need to say anything

The only other exception to my "I hate beards" rule

The mustache cannot stand on its own it must be accompanied by the beard

1000/10 I want him to fuck me just so I could forget about my problems for a while

No (1971)

How did we go from McBeardy to t h i s

You really thought that having beard hair longer than the hair on your head was a good idea? I think the fuck not, James.

Every time I think about Paul's style evolution I desperately try to delete this one from my memory

0/10 I actively despise this

Hot Dad at a Pool Party (1972)

Well at least the beard is gone

The title is exactly what I mean. I have no other way of describing this look

His hair is a little shorter than I feel is the ideal length for him but it's not bad

7.5/10 it's enough to make me have a crush on him, but it would be nothing more than that

Baby's First Mullet (1973)

Looks cute but also concerningly sexy

I hate that I like this but then again rockstar mullets are different than regular mullets so I have nothing to be embarrassed about

His eyes are so big how does he do that

9.5/10 if I saw him at a club I would definitely wanna sleep with him

The Eighth Circle of Hell (1974)

And we're back here again I am in AGONY

The trainwreck of a mustache ON TOP OF THE MULLET? I am at my fucking limit.

This is the face of a man who has done his fair share of cocaine

12598347/10 I had it at a 2.5/10 at first and the only reason I changed it is because there is some sick twisted part of me that's attracted to this and maybe that's why I'm so angry about it. I thought about my rating overnight and ended up having a dream that we fucked and he looked like this and it was so hot. My affinity for skrunkly men is one that both comforts and deeply disturbs me.

Mullet Yoyo (1975-78)

No matter how long or short the mullet got it never left

At least the mustache is gone I can't take having to face my most embarrassing turn-ons anymore

To be honest he somehow looks more unhinged with just the mullet

7.5/10 my brain doesn't like it as much without the facial hair oh my god Cherry what the FUCK is wrong with you

Intermission (1979-80)

It's not that I don't like this. I just really have nothing much to say about it

Sort of a middle ground in between the chaotic energy from the 70s and the dilf energy of the 80s

He looks handsome I'll give him that

7/10 I certainly have nothing to complain about

Give My Regards to Dilf Street (1981-85)

Oh shit here we go

His hair got longer and none of us knew how to act

When I say I watch the Broad Street movie for the plot, this is the plot

3000/10 this man is a frequent visitor of my sexual fantasies

Warden at Horny Jail (1986)

I'm- 🥴

Nobody talk to me

This is the epitome of dilf energy it's not even a competition

36459871/10 please just fuck me already

Questionable Choices (1987-88)

He cut his hair I am in shambles

Paul why

He doesn't look bad but obviously the long hair is way better

5/10 I don't hate it but my heart belongs to another

The Swan is Gliding (1989-97)

The dilf haircut is back thank god

Paul you have redeemed yourself

He looks unbelievably sexy but for some reason it's missing something that he had in '86 and I don't know what it is- oH MY GOD HE DYED HIS HAIR THAT'S WHAT IT IS

1000000/10 it's still one of my faves but COME ON PAUL YOU'RE A DILF FOR GOD'S SAKE YOU NEED TO EMBRACE YOUR GRAY HAIR YOU'RE A SILVER FOX BABE PLEASE

Time Traveler (1998-2003)

He started looking real old real quick

But of course I will not be harsh with this era because I know it was a super tough one for him

I know all too well that when you're super stressed out, your appearance is the furthest thing from your mind

5/10 honestly he just looks like a typical guy in his sixties so there's nothing to bash anyway 😊❤

Lead Role in a CBS Crime Drama (2004-10)

This pic just gives me NCIS/Criminal Minds cast photo vibes idk

Again I mean this in the best way possible but he looks like just some guy and there's nothing wrong with that

A suit will always be sexy to me though

8/10 I have a certain appreciation for this one

Main Character Energy (2011-16)

This era of Paul was the moment

His hair is longer again and yes I do think he looks very sexy

A majority of the music he released in this era is just *chef's kiss*

10/10 this photo is from the promo for the NEW album which fucking slaps btw it's honestly one of my favorite albums from his solo career

Hey Grandude (2017-19)

I'm sorry I just had to name it that I think him using it for a children's book title is too cute

The gray hair is coming back and I very much do think it suits him

This is not so much "just some guy" but more like "a guy who aged beautifully"

9/10 if you told me he was approaching 80 years old I would not believe you

Eternal Rockstar (2020-Present Day)

Oh my god shUT UP

I have to say dilf. Do I have to say dilf? I feel like I have to say dilf

Don't dye your hair anymore babe you don't need it

10000/10 I had to choose this photo it taunts me too much 🥵

#1974 gave me an existential crisis that i would like to never experience again dear lord #I saved Paul's for last because I knew it was going to cause me the most emotional damage #Out of all things I had to prepare myself for...having to accept the fact that I'm down bad for an 80 year old man was not one of them #paul mccartney #james paul mccartney #the beatles #beatles #george harrison #ringo starr #john lennon

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autisticlee · 7 months

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i've noticed that there's always a lot of discourse about trying on labels like for sexuality and gender for example. people saying if you dont know, don't claim am identity. people complaining about people using labels lying and being fakes. complaining when someone changes their lable/identity.

you even see it in conservatives who whine and cry about gender and sexuality saying stuff like "you can't know that yet/you're too young/what if it changes/you can't just decide now and change later" and seeing queer people say the same things can be super discouraging and alienating.

because the thing is, humans do change. It's a natural phenomenon we can't do anything about. it's perfectly ok to feel one way now and then realize you feel differently later on. it can be because life experiences changed who you, or you realize/discover something, or etc.

also, how will someone know who/what they are without trying things out to see what fits? to see what feels right? not everyone just KNOWS who they are or what they want or how they feel automatically. telling people they can't experiment to see what works does nothing but alienate them and make them feel even more lost and alone.

i know it's a bit more of a touchy and difficult subject and im debating adding it in, but I see a similar discourse for example in the autistic community where people try to gatekeep the identity for only "officially diagnosed" people. (I was trying to think of something else that's not only gender/sexuality because my whole point should apply to more than just queer identities but this is all I could think of atm) i've seen it in other communities as well (mental or physical illnesses and disabilities and stuff for example) you have to relate to an identity basically, in order to bring it to a doctor. usually a doctor won't just say "oh you have this!" on their own; you have to tell the doctor "I think I have this" and sometimes it takes you years of research to figure out things yourself (because we all know doctors can be useless at times) by that point, if someone is putting that much time into a thing, there less chance of them faking it. if they think they have a disorder like DID but don't, then they still need help. but there shouldn't be so much aggression towards people who get evaluated or reevaluated and realize they were wrong. it's actually ok to be wrong and correct yourself later, contrary to popular belief. 1 or 19 or even 100 people being wrong doesn't mean we should let that reflect on *everyone* and let people with ill intent call everyone a "faker"

even if it turns out you were wrong, there's no real harm in trying on things until you reach a final conclusion. it's other people's opnions and reactions to it that are the harmful part.

[imagine if you had to guess what clothes and shoes would fit you, look good on you, and feel good without trying them on, you have to decide on one only, and then you have to keep wearing only those clothes and shoes after that and can never change out of them. that's so silly, right?]

sometimes you have to make guesses about your identity first and get confirmation later. sometimes you guess that you are a cishet man and date a cishet woman and realize a few years into the relationship that you are actually a trans lesbian. It's perfectly fine and normal to change after some time! we all need to not gatekeep and instead support each other. accept each other either way.

if someone feels they are trans for years and transitions and then realizes they are actually nonbinary and maybe slides into a more androgynous state or even stops transition or detransitions, don't call them fake! if someone is aroace and then starts dating, realizing they felt that way due to trauma in the past but were able to heal from it, don't call then a fraud! if a lesbian falls in love with a man and realizes she's actually bi, don't say she lied or tricked you!

yes, I know that there's often stigmas and stereotypes about changing. the whole "it's just a phase" thing for example. or accusing people of "following a trend." and the whole fact that the phobes always try to force their harmful belief that these identities are a "choice" and "choosing" them is wrong. change can mimic "a choice," but change does not always equal choice! someone changing does NOT always mean they are choosing something different. many times in life change isn't a choice!!! the fact that reflects poorly on the lables/communities by those who already have a bias against them is what needs change.

but that's the thing. that's precisely what i'm saying. we need to break down those stigmas around change. so what if it's a "phase" ???? why can't someone have an experience for a short time and then change it later due to whatever reason or circumstances? why can't someone try something out and then realize it's not right later on? why do we have to decide on a label or identity for life while still trying to figure out who we are? why is someone naturally changing or realizing something about themselves considered lying and fake? why do we let other people's bad opinions create stigmas and stereotypes around everything and then let that dictate everything we do? instead of gatekeeping and hurting potential new community members, why can't we break down those stereotypes and stigmas instead? instead of shaming people who try out your lables, why not shame and demonize the people that throw stereotypes and stigmas at you just because someone else is trying to figure out who they are still????? why let haters dictate how you treat others?

choose the right battles. fight the right people.

#lee rambles #lgbt #lgbtqia #lgbtq community #queer #what do i tag this as???? too many words. brain tired from words and cant think of tags now #maybe those few will be fine for now #i hope this ramble made sense. it was hard to put into words. so not sure if it came across correctly or not #took forever to write. dont feel like proofreading. apologies for any typos or mistakes

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ch33z-wiz · 2 years

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I headcannon Lloyd to be an OSDD1B system. My only evidence is ✨️trauma ✨️ and I'm part of a system and want characters to relate to lol

Any who here are some incorrect quotes based on that. Also Lloyd has introjects of Harumi and Morro (cause I said so) "F." Will stand for factive/fictive.

There's also a little named Raina

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

F.Harumi: Ew why do you look like that? You're ugly

Harumi: Don't you look exactly like me in the headspace?!

F.Harumi: Yes... but not ugly like you

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

F. Harumi: Hey Rumi

Harumi: Yeah....

F. Harumi: I'm an introject of you right?

Harumi: right...

F.Harumi: And I exist because of you... so does that mean you're my...

Harumi: Rumi please no

F.Harumi: My mommy?

Harumi: Holy shit Overlord please crush me with another building

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lloyd: Dad I need to tell you something....

[Ressurected] Garmadon: What that an evil is coming to destroy Ninjago? Cause if so I am NOT-

Lloyd: NO! Not that. I *sigh* I was diagnosed with OSDD1B its like DID, meaning I have alternate identities but don't have memory loss beteeen them, I've known something was up for a while but now I know what it is...it's because of repeated early childhood trauma

Garmadon: Trauma? What trauma could you have

Lloyd: Seriously?!

Garmadon: yes seriously

Lloyd: Let's see, I was abandoned by BOTH of my parents. Lived in a boarding school where I was bullied constantly, and then discovered I was the Green Ninja and would have to fight my father to to the death. Not to mention I was kidnapped almost died in LAVA prior to discovering that? "

Garmadon: Oh PLEASE that's a cake walk compared to what I've seen the past thousand years!"

Harumi (Gatekeeper): *struggling to keep Morro (protector) from fronting and beating his ass

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Darreth: So let me get this straight... you're a system?

F.Morro: Yes

Darreth: So...is there an evil alter

F.Morro: No, but we'll all become the evil alter if you don't shut the fuck up

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jay: Hey Lloyd where's the Halloween Cand-

Raina (Little): *shoving face with candy*

Jay: You aren't Lloyd...are you?

Raina: *shaking head*

Jay: COLE ITS YOUR TURN TO WATCH THE CHILD, I THINK ITS RAINA!

Cole: *yelling from the other ship* RAINA WANNA PLAY PRIME EMPIRE WITH ME? I HAVE CAKE!

Raina: *Usain Bolts her ass to Cole*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bully: HA! You're telling me the Green Ninja is a system? Oh is the little baby personality gonna cry?

Nya *being held back by Jay*: LET ME AT HIM

Kai *being held back by Cole*: WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU! KNOW ONE SAYS THAT ABOUT RAINA

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Raina: Kai! I wanna ride on your shoulders!

Kai: Sorry kiddo the body is a little too big for that

Raina: *death stare*

Raina: *ontop of a struggling Kai* IM THE QUEEN OF THE MOUNTAIN GIVE ME YOUR CANDY!!!

Nya: *dying laughing*

Cole: EXCUSE ME?! I HAVE SUPER STRENGTH I COULD'VE DONE IT

Raina: I know, I just wanted to mess with Kai

Cole: Oh my God you are the best child ever

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zane: Jay, Kai I require your assistance

Jay/Kai: Yeah?

Zane: I'm trying to assist Lloyd in figuring something out

Jay: What is it?

Lloyd: Someone messaged Harumi and I have no clue who. I don't know if they're new

Kai: I thought you remembered this stuff?

Lloyd: I do remember what happened, but I don't always remember WHO did it.

Kai: *reading text* "Just saying I'm hotter than you." This sounds alot like Rumi

Jay: Yeah, doesn't she like to call Harumi "ugly"

Lloyd: That's what I thought, but she said she didn't type it

Jay: Well then maybe Morro?

Kai: Yeah maybe

Lloyd: Nope not him either, Morro hates Harumi and would NEVER message her

Jay: Hmmm... maybe Raina?

Zane: The seven year old?

Jay: Yeah her, unless it was someone else? What aren't there like 13 of you?

Lloyd: I doubt it, I'll ask her

Lloyd: *sighs* She did it

Kai: Oh my FSM I adore that kid.

#headc

#incorrect ninjago quotes #ninjago #incorrect quotes #ninjago headcanons #lloyd garmadon #jay walker ninjago #kai smith #zane julien

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turboduck · 1 year

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Blog Intro!

Hello! My name is Kody and I'm a bisexual transmasc therian/otherkin! I'm 20 years old. My pronouns are he/him and they/them with a general preference more towards he/him. I've been in the trans/LGBTQ+ community for several years now, but I am kind of new to the therian/otherkin community so I'm still learning about that. I'm hoping to use this blog as a place to share my feelings/experiences and learn about those of others with therianthropy and other nonhuman experiences. I also reblog furry art a lot since I love animal characters, for obvious reasons.

My kintypes are: Wolverine, raccoon, cougar, crow, an alien species (not one from any existing media that I know of), and duck (specifically the African pygmy goose, which in spite of it's name, is a duck, not a goose lol).

Types I'm questioning currently: Donkey/mule, wolf or some other canine (but def not fox), bumble or carpenter bee, spotted hyena, platypus, bongo antelope, some kind of deer???, and parakeet (I'm thinking maybe Rosella parakeet).

This blog is sfw and minor friendly, however I may occasionally mention past trauma as it relates to my transgender and my inhuman experience (this includes trans and queerphobia, religious trauma, disassociation, isolation, and past struggles with self-harm). I also occasionally reblog art with gore in it so if any of the above makes you super uncomfortable, feel free to not interact. I will place trigger warnings at the top of any posts I make discussing trauma. Although my blog is minor-friendly I am uncomfortable interacting with anyone under 16.

My DNI: Transphobes, homophobes, anti-xenogender/anti-neopronouns, anyone who wants to police/gatekeep identity labels, racists, conservatives, anti-choice, pedos, zoophiles and necrophiles, pro-shippers, heavily nsfw blogs, and minors under 16.

#trans #transgender #transmasc #ftm #trans man #therian #therianthropy #otherkin #lgbtq #lgbtqia #wolverine therian #duck therian #raccoon therian #cougar therian #crow therian #alienkin #blog intro

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faroreswinds · 2 years

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Japanese anon. This isn’t necessarily as a protest, but many people besides going back to original houses, are now playing touken ranbu musou…and fire emblem if. Gatekeeper is also not as popular as in the west, the new father characters are seen as more interesting. No one really cares about arval (one title i saw applied was “dlc-kun”) unless talking about shez. There is confusion over why byleth calls jeralt by name instead of as their father because apparently some dialogue boxes like korean have byleth saying father in text but not spoken, but people notice that western fans say this part snidely to suggest byleth is not a nice or affectionate person, which does not help calm feelings of animosity. I cannot read chinese but was told chinese fans are among the angriest.

Actually, can you explain gatekeeper?

I will be out for a few days to visit family. It’s good to talk and I hope I can resume after that visit!

Hi Japanese anon, I hope you enjoy your visit! Have lots of fun!

There is confusion over why byleth calls jeralt by name instead of as their father because apparently some dialogue boxes like korean have byleth saying father in text but not spoken, but people notice that western fans say this part snidely to suggest byleth is not a nice or affectionate person, which does not help calm feelings of animosity.

Well it is a bit odd. In my country at least, calling your parents by their names means you are not close, and that you do not see them as parental figures. It's normally rude, unless it's something specific like the parental figure is a step-parent of some kind that came late into your life.

But I don't think it makes Byleth unaffectionate. On the contrary, he's quite affection. He went and got his father flowers! And he clearly cares about people, he's just super focused and not socially inclined.

I cannot read chinese but was told chinese fans are among the angriest.

I don't either. Maybe @renisfan can enlighten us?

Actually, can you explain gatekeeper?

Sure. I am actually someone who likes Gatekeeper (although I was mad about CYH5) so I can elaborate. Although, I can only elaborate my view, and not necessarily the entire fanbase's view.

First of all, Gatekeeper is a constant NPC. He's not just a one-off NPC who says their thing and is never seen again. He is always there, guarding the gate. And he's nice, and funny! His dedication to guarding the gate and his upbeat attitude makes him endearing, and after a few chapters I started to be soft on him. I had even made a post back in the day (Not on tumblr) saying something like "The real hero of Foldan!" and posting his picture.

It's really meant to be in good fun, and not to be taken seriously.

He's an NPC that has developed an identity, despite having a generic model. I suppose, in a way, I relate to that? He's the everyman among a crowd of special people.

Plus, in English, his VA is the same VA who voiced Alm. So among the English crowd, it's like Alm is a secret character among Foldan. At least, for those who know who the VA is, anyways.

I hope that makes sense? That's just for me, anyways, I dare not speak for the whole fandom on this.

#Three Hopes #anon asks

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vreenak · 2 years

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How are you findings the Rings of Power, if you're watching?

I'm really enjoying it a lot! I don't think it's perfect or one of my top 5 shows or anything, but it's fun! And you know, these days that's enough for me, even though the flaws are obvious. I think the key is not having high expectations … which is so much easier said than done, especially with sth. as iconic as Tolkien's world. For context, I was in my late teens when the Peter Jackson trilogy came out, it was a huge deal to me. In no way am I a life-long fan or anything and I only read the Silmarillion once, but yeah, I was invested in the fandom for many years and it's all close to my heart. But ... I was never a purist or gatekeeper. And when they announced there was going to be a show I was excited. But I'm not naive, I know this was going to be sth. aimed at a mainstream audience and they made that crystal clear, the more info we got, about the characters, the time period they were going to cover etc. I admit, when the teaser trailer came out I was disappointed, mostly by the … basic writing/dialogue. But at that point I was just happy Robert Aramayo was going to play Elrond, who happens to be my favorite character. I just knew he'd nail it when that first photo came out, long hair or not.

And yeah, to me, Elrond is the best part of the show. He ties it all together. It's weird, but there are moments when I feel like he's channeling Hugo Weaving, without imitating him or anything ofc. I'm a sucker for elves anyway. Lindon is beautiful. Gil-galad! 😱Celebrimbor! tbh when it comes down to it, I'm just another fangirl who loves to see all these pretty people wearing their pretty robes in a dreamy autumn setting. It almost makes me forget that it's kinda shallow the way the writers/producers are playing us re: Sauron's identity. I know it's getting old, but I don't really care at the end of the day, cause they decided to throw in Adar and the Mount Doom/Mordor reveal, and the Arondir/Bronwyn romance, and Disa (!!!!), and the three creepy cultists I LOVE for some reason????? It's all shiny, I'm here for it.

Sorry, this got really long! Thank you so much for the ask!!! What do you think about the show? You're not super impressed iirc?

#lovely things

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notabled-noodle · 2 years

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hey, i just wanted to apologize for asking the question about whether or not i can use the word cr*pple. i know that you cant dictate who can say what word, and doing so would be like...gatekeeping or something. and i understand that. i suppose I just wanted the opinion of someone who uses the word as a personal descriptor. because I often feel like i need permission for everything I do, and I have no disabled friends or acquaintances to talk about it with. so again, im sorry for pushing you further into the messiness of "who can say what slurs". because I am fully aware that no one can control that, its a personal choice of what you can say, and everyone just needs to be nice to one another.

that being said, I wanted to say that your response was actually very enlightening. having someone who is disabled validate my pain and say that they think I am also disabled helped a lot. i understand that its not necessary for one person to say "yeah youre disabled" for you to be disabled and valid. that would be like saying you cant call yourself a lesbian until you explain your attraction and sexualilty to a lesbian and have them either say "no youre not a lesbian" or "yeah youre a lesbian". so. i understand that its not necessary for a disabled person to tell another person they are/arent disabled, but it alleviated some of my anxiety and helps me feel like maybe Im not delusional and manipulating myself and others.

and saying that the cr*pple community is here if I decide to reclaim the word, that meant a lot to me. truly. thank you, so much.

i know this is Another long post, and im sorry. i have issues with adding a lot more words than necessary. again, you dont have to respond if you dont have the spoons, and you dont have to respond at all if you dont feel like it. just knowing that you read it is enough for me.

hey!

it’s okay. I understand that this stuff can be super tricky and hard to navigate, especially when you don’t have other disabled people around you. I’m still coming to terms with a lot of things around my disabled identity, so I do get it!

I hope your battle with internalised ableism isn’t too hard to push through, and that you find ways to manage your pain that work for you.

#asks

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teaveetamer · 2 years

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How would you respond to FE elitists (like certain YouTubers who will remain unnamed) who criticize casual mode BECAUSE it causes players to "play worse" since they can get away with playing more reckless since fallen units will just return anyway? As someone who has played an equal amount of FE games with and without casual mode, I think it's a good quality of life feature. But I can't say I always play wisely while knowing that I have a crutch. I play how I want, and I just enjoy what I like.

I would ask them… who exactly is it hurting? If you don’t want to play on casual mode because it makes you play sloppier, then just don’t play on casual mode? How does someone playing sloppy on casual mode affect your enjoyment of the game? It doesn’t.

The crux of their argument essentially boils down to “Well they don’t get the ‘right’ experience of the game!” as if their chosen preferred experience is the best or correct way to experience a piece of media. There is no “wrong” way to experience a piece of media. Whatever brings you the most joy is the correct experience for you.

The best thing this series did is having options so that everyone can play how they want. If you want to do a super tight run playing LTC, optimally, Ironman, etc. then you can! If you want a chill experience with no consequences, you can too!

Personally, I don’t care about playing optimally. I mainly play these games for the fun and the story, and if I’m not having fun because it’s impossible to advance unless you’re playing optimally, then I just won’t play. The reality is, I am an adult with a life and I play games to relax. I don’t have time to reset a chapter 15 times until I get it just right, and I don’t find that kind of frustration a fun use of my limited free time. So what if it “makes me play sloppy”? I’m having fun either way!

Honestly this is a trend I notice in a lot of gaming spaces, not just FE. Dark Souls also comes to mind. The OG/hardcore (frequently toxic dudebros, just again IME) revolt against a game series getting more accessible or easier for casual audiences to enjoy because they hinge their pride on being able to play and beat this difficult experience. Like, it actually becomes part of their identity, “good enough to beat XYZ game”. They like being able to gatekeep the experience of their favorite games more than anything else (primarily, in my experience, from women. Notice how when FE started getting easier and more in on the ship culture, complaints started rolling in about “those dumb fujos who only play for the hot guy on guy action and not the ✨true gameplay experience✨”?), which is really not sustainable for a series if you want it to grow and reach more audiences. Gatekeeping is antithetical to growth.

I could honestly fill a whole book about this but I’ll stop here. TL;DR screw those gatekeeping losers, games are meant to be experienced however you want

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ofdreamsanddoodles · 2 years

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you largely write fanfiction, though, right? i think that post about writers that don't read was about people writing novels/original fiction, in which case it does seem ridiculous for them to write but not read. like a director that doesn't watch movies

that's not the point, though. what i was saying was, if i write a book, and i physically do not have the energy to read the work of other ppl in my genre (which i won't deny isn't ideal!).... am i not allowed to call myself a writer? like, yeah, of course it's about writing novels. ana mardoll is a published writer. literally all he said was that you shouldn't be mocking someone for not being able to read a certain amount, because you're inevitably going to be making fun of some disabled people, and some of those people are going to be writers.

you can still be consuming different art forms with different story structures & not read much. i think it's super important to be aware of the different tropes & whatnot of your genre, and the best way of doing that probably involves reading, but someone saying "hey, i have multiple disabilities, and the pandemic completely shot my attention span. i don't think it's fair that i'm seeing a post acting like this means i don't have what it takes to be a writer" doesn't really warrant screenshotting their post & saying "we are doomed as a society."

also, like i said, the thread xe's referring to is about how some people have a harder time finding other, already published books to reference as like their story when trying to get published themselves & the OP saying that was because they haven't read enough, even if they were writing a book about a marginalized identity that hadn't previously been the subject of a lot of books. what xe was reacting to was a thread about gatekeeping publishing, not someone saying something about how a lot of good directors take inspiration from other director's films

#asks

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violetsystems · 2 years

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Speaking of spanking, I have one of the deceptions on the vita. I’ve been slowly gathering things I already have together rather than buying anything new. Watched krull on dvd yesterday thinking my internet was going to be down for the rest of the weekend. Super elden ring vibes. I don’t know how long I can stay around chicago and get clowned. But the technicians who fixed the internet did say they liked my setup. It’s the people really. And you can tell that they’re mad just because you won’t join their political cult. I do this cycle every couple of years. I stand up for myself. Call people out on there shit. They ignore then forget and then start over on some whole other shit. People on the sidelines get confused and need clarification about who I am. Rinse and repeat. An identity crisis that’s out of my hands at this point. They gatekeep out of narcissism and lack of confidence I’m doing something they could be ok with. It’s not like you don’t gain self confidence from all this. Japan is cheap right now. So is flying. Though money is not exactly tight, it is finite. I’m getting the vibe people know the entire fucked up story now. They’re just keeping their distance as to not get caught on record. Or hate keeping. That’s an autocorrect I’m going to stick with. When you can have strangers in your home who are polite and like fighting games, it really puts the anger out there in the streets in context. You don’t know me and yet I know every fucked up thing about your city from the last decade and beyond. I’m going to hold down the fort while they figure out who is defending the castle. These gates are pretty much locked for the rest of the year. The reality show I didn’t consent to around here ain’t got shit to do with me. 🔐

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thebookdragon217 · 2 years

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It's finally September and I am excited for what is to come the rest of the year. I have some things in the works that I am super proud of and can't wait to share soon. I've already started on planning for this year's #PRHeritageMonthTour and I wanted to share a list of 2022 Puerto Rican Authored Books that either released already or are in the works for later this year that should be on your radar and added to your TBR. I also wanted to share the following reminders: 🇵🇷 Puerto Ricans and Latinx people are not a monolith. Our experiences and stories are not the same. We are capable of telling our own intersectional stories and should be afforded the same opportunities. 🇵🇷 Puerto Ricans are a mixed people due to slavery and settler colonialism. Many of us are biracial, mixed, or multiracial, as well as bi- and multi-cultural, and it doesn't make us any less of any of our identities. If you're gatekeeping identities, please refocus on decolonizing and re-educating yourself. 🇵🇷 Puerto Ricans across the diaspora have been storytellers since the beginning of time and our stories should be amplified, recognized and celebrated all year round. Puerto Rican authors have been brining main character energy and writing amazing tales with mass appeal forever. 🇵🇷 As we go into Latinx Heritage Month understand that some Latinx countries like Puerto Rico and Cuba are still not free. Colonialism is alive and well and capitalism, corporate greed and gentrification continues to displace us. I hope you enjoy this list and find some new favorites to add to your TBR and share with others. This list encompasses a range of books that represent a myriad of identities, genres and interests. 🇵🇷 Yo sería boricua aunque naciera en la luna 🇵🇷 #ReadPuertoRican #PuertoRico #ReadCaribbean #boricua #tbr #bookcommunity #reading #PR #bookstagrampr #ownvoices #boricuabooks #latinxbooks #latinxbookstagram #latinx #reading #bookstagram #book #diaspora #booklover #libros #bookish #readersofinstagram #decolonizeyourreading #list #weneeddiversebooks #read https://www.instagram.com/p/CiI5EDsrmJ4/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

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transgenderteensurvivalguide · 2 years

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Lee says:

Hi everyone! I'm posting today to specifically point out an awesome resource that more people should be aware of.

The Gender Affirming Letter Access Project (GALAP) is an organization of independent clinicians who help transgender people access gender-affirming medical treatment like hormone replacement therapy and surgery by providing free letters using the informed-consent system.

The providers listed in the GALAP directory have pledged to complete at least one free informed-consent session and subsequently write at least one free letter per month.

This is super important because many people aren't able to get insurance coverage for the treatment they need without getting a WPATH-compliant letter, and that can make it difficult for someone to be able to start their transition.

For example, many low-income trans people aren't able to afford multiple therapy sessions which makes getting the WPATH-compliant letter difficult for them.

Similarly, trans people living in rural areas face more barriers in being able to find therapists near them who are trans-friendly and currently accepting new patients.

In my own personal transition, I've needed to get...

1 letter from a mental health provider to start HRT

1 from a mental health provider plus 1 letter from my testosterone prescriber to have top surgery

Letters from 2 different mental health providers respectively plus one from my testosterone prescriber to get a hysterectomy

Letters from 2 different mental health providers plus one from my testosterone prescriber to get the first stage of phalloplasty

Letters from 2 different mental health providers plus one from my testosterone prescriber to more to get the second stage because my first set of letters had expired in the meantime

And I'll need 2 more for the third stage because I'll be switching insurances and need to re-start my approval process

For anyone keeping a tally, I needed to get 10 mental health letters saying that I am trans and need to transition before I could get the medical care I needed, not including the “proof of HRT” letters.

It’s ridiculous— If I had needed treatment for any other reason, I wouldn’t have needed to jump through so many gatekeeping hoops where cisgender medical professionals were the arbiters if I was trans enough and deserve care.

For example, my stage 3 phalloplasty surgery is just having an erectile implant placed because I have erectile dysfunction. This is true of all post-phalloplasty patients as a result of the way our penis is structured.

If I were a cisgender man getting the same surgery for erectile dysfunction and having the same device implanted, I would not need to see two mental health professionals first who would judge me on my gender identity before deciding whether I should be allowed get the implant.

The urologist would just use their best medical judgement in determining whether the surgery would be a good idea and then explain the risks and benefits of the procedure and let me decide if I wanted to go ahead and do it. Then the doc would send the insurance the preauthorization info and codes for the procedure based on the diagnosis, and no required mental health evaluation or therapist letter would be involved at all.

But because my surgery is a “gender affirming surgery” for “treatment of gender dysphoria,” I have to see two therapists first and they will judge if I’m “trans enough” and then they have to write a letter saying that I need the surgery because I’m mentally ill (aka diagnosed with “gender dysphoria”) before my insurance will cover the surgery that’ll let me have an erection.

In my opinion, that’s paternalistic, demeaning, unnecessary and a waste of everyone’s time. And it isn’t just weird, invasive, and annoying— it can determine whether you’re able to access necessary medical care.

The GALAP also addresses how requiring a letter is a form of gatekeeping which can negatively impact multiply marginalized minorities, stating, "We are aware that people who do not fit a certain narrative about what it means to be 'transgender' often receive subpar care and face more barriers to receiving the care they need. We acknowledge that this greatly impacts people of color and indigenous communities, nonbinary people, and neurodivergent people."

The provider will have an interview session with you, using the informed consent approach in their interviewing, and then will write a letter, again using the informed consent approach in their letter writing process.

The interview session, the letter (and any additional copies of the letter) are all supposed to be pro-bono, which just means it's free. They aren't supposed to charge you for anything, like additional time on letter writing outside the therapy session, any clinical consultation they need to perform, or any communication with your surgeons and medical staff.

I believe that majority (or possibly all) of the providers in the directory will only provide informed consent letters for legal adults as the wesbite says "writing letters for youth brings up complexities since minors may assent but not consent without parent/guardian support to move forward with any medical interventions," so it's a resource that is more useful for those who are 18 or older.

You'll also need to discuss with your letter writer if they are comfortable officially diagnosing you with gender dysphoria if your medical provider/s and/or insurance company requires a formal a diagnosis of Gender Dysphoria to access gender-affirming medical services.

You should also check whether your letter writer needs particular credentials.

My insurance said:

“One of these letters must be from a psychiatrist, psychologist, nurse practitioner, psychiatric nurse practitioner, or licensed clinical social worker with whom the member has an established and ongoing relationship.

The other letter may be from a psychiatrist, psychologist, nurse practitioner, physician, psychiatric nurse practitioner, or licensed clinical social worker acting within the scope of his or her practice, who has only had an evaluative role with the member.”

Your insurance company may have more rigid requirements and need a letter from a medical doctor or doctor of osteopathic for example, and may not accept a licensed clinical social worker, or they may allow any mental health practitioner.

So it’s good to double-check that the person you’re contacting in the directory has the license you need for your requirements.

The GALAP site says:

"Just because someone has signed The GALAP pledge or uses our name and logo on their website unfortunately doesn’t guarantee that they are honoring our pledge’s totally FREE letter writing (and session) commitment.

When reaching out to request a letter, we encourage you to ask the therapist/letter writer:

1) Is this entire letter writing process (including the time it takes to meet) completely free, as in keeping with The GALAP pledge? 2) Have you written surgery letters on behalf of trans and nonbinary folks before that have been accepted by surgeons and/or insurance companies?

While we can’t monitor or endorse therapists who sign the pledge, you can find out if they will honor the pledge BEFORE you meet with them."

The (current as of 04/2022) list of states that currently have a provider who has agreed to write free letters is below:

Alabama (1)

Alaska (2)

Arizona (9)

Arkansas (2)

California (62)

Colorado (19)

Connecticut (11)

Delaware (1)

District of Columbia (1)

Florida (11)

Georgia (22)

Hawaii (0)

Idaho (7)

Illinois (21)

Indiana (9)

Iowa (0)

Kansas (2)

Kentucky (1)

Louisiana (3)

Maine (2)

Maryland (18)

Massachusetts (17)

Michigan (13)

Minnesota (1)

Mississippi (1)

Missouri (2)

Montana (1)

Nebraska (3)

Nevada (1)

New Hampshire (3)

New Jersey (5)

New Mexico (1)

New York (26)

North Carolina (8)

North Dakota (0)

Ohio (7)

Oklahoma (2)

Oregon (11)

Pennsylvania (11)

Rhode Island (2)

South Carolina (2)

South Dakota (0)

Tennessee (4)

Texas (8)

Utah (5)

Vermont (3)

Virginia (8)

Washington (22)

West Virginia (1)

Wisconsin (6)

Wyoming (1)

Most providers can only provide a letter to people residing in their state(s) of licensure, and there are some states that don't have any providers listed at all, so hopefully more providers will sign the pledge and get listed in the directory in the future.

But even as it is today, this is a super-useful resource for trans people who are looking to medically transition, and hopefully more people become aware of it and are able to make use of it going forward!

Our post on how to start HRT in the USA has linked to the GALAP website so this isn't the first time I've mentioned their directory, but I felt like the GALAP directory deserved its own post, so here it is!

#Lee says #trans #transgender #informed consent #wpath letters #wpath-compliant letters #starting hrt #getting surgery #medical transitioning #galapagos #the galap

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mishafletcher · 4 years

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Are you a Gold Star lesbian? (Just in case you don't know what it means, a Gold Star lesbian is a lesbian that has never had the sex with a guy and would never have any intentions of ever doing so)

So I got this ask a while ago, and I've been lowkey thinking about it ever since.

First: No. I am a queer, cranky dyke who is too old for this sort of bullshit gatekeeping.

Second: What an unbelievable question to ask someone you don't even know! What an incomprehensibly rude thing to ask, as if you're somehow owed information about my sexual history. You're not! No one—and I can't reiterate this enough, but no one—owes you the details of their sex lives, of their trauma, or of anything about themselves that they don't feel like sharing with you.

The clickbait mills of the internet and the purity police of social media would like nothing more than to convince everyone that you owe these things to everyone. They would like you to believe that you have to prove that you're traumatized enough to identify with this character, that you can't sell this article about campus rape without relating it to your own sexual assault, that you can't talk about queer issues without offering up a comprehensive history of your own experiences, and none of those things are true. You owe people, and especially random strangers on the internet, nothing, least of all citations to somehow prove to them that you have the right to talk about your own life.

This makes some people uncomfortable, and to be clear, I think that that's good: people who feel entitled to demand this information should be uncomfortable. Refusing to justify yourself takes power away from people who would very much like to have it, people who would like to gatekeep and dictate who is permitted to speak about what topics or like what things. You don't have to justify yourself. You don't have to explain that you like this ship because this one character reminds you a bit of yourself because you were traumatized in a vaguely similar way and now— You don't have to justify your queerness by telling people about the best friend you had when you were twelve, and how you kissed, and she laughed and said it was good practice for when she would kiss boys and your stomach twisted and your mouth tasted like bile and she was the first and last girl you kissed, but—

You don't owe anyone these pieces of yourself. They're yours, and you can share them or not, but if someone demands that you share, they're probably not someone you should trust.

Third: The idea of gold star lesbians is a profoundly bi- and trans- phobic idea, often reducing gender to genitals and the long, shared history of queer women of all identities to a stark, artificial divide where some identities are seen as purer or more valuable than others. This is bullshit on all counts.

There's a weird and largely artificial division between bisexuals and lesbians that seems to be intensifying on tumblr, and I have to say: I hate it. Bisexual women aren't failed lesbians. They're not somehow less good or less valid because they're attracted to [checks notes] people. Do you think that having sex with a man somehow changes them? What are you so worried about it for? I've checked, and having sex with a man does not, in fact, make your vagina grow teeth or tentacles. Does that make you feel better? Why is what other people are doing so threatening to you?

Discussions of gold star lesbians are often filled with tittering about hehe penises, which is unfortunate, since I know a fair few lesbians who have penises, and even more lesbians who've had sex with people, men and women alike, who have penises. I'm sorry to report that "I'm disgusted by a standard-issue human body part" is neither a personality nor anything to be proud of. I'm a dyke and I don't especially like men, but dicks are just dicks. You don't have to be interested in them, but a lot of people have them, and it doesn't make you less of a lesbian to have sex with someone who has a dick.

There's so much garbage happening in the world—maybe you haven't noticed, but things are kind of Not Great in a lot of places, and there's a whole pandemic thing that's been sort of a major buzzkill? How is this something that you're worried about? Make a tea, remind yourself that other people's genitalia and sexual history are none of your business, maybe go watch a video about a cute animal or something.

Fourth: The idea of gold star lesbians is a shitty premise that argues that sexuality is better if it's always been clear-cut and straightforward—but it rarely is. We live in a very, very heterosexist culture. I didn’t have a word for lesbian until many years after I knew that I was one. How can you say that you are something when your mouth can’t even make the shape of it? The person you are at 24 is different to the person you are at 14, and 34, and 74. You change. You get braver. The world gets wider. You learn to see possibilities in the shadows you used to overlook. Of course people learn more about themselves as they age.

Also, many of us, especially those of us who grew up in smaller towns, or who are over the age of, say, 25, grew up in times and places where our sexuality was literally criminal.

Shortly after I graduated high school, a gay man in my state was sentenced to six months in jail. Why? Well, he’d hit on someone, and it was a misdemeanor to "solicit homosexual or lesbian activity", which included expressing romantic or sexual interest in someone who didn’t reciprocate. You might think, then, that I am in fact quite old, but you would be mistaken. The conviction was in 1999; it was overturned in 2002.

I grew up knowing this: the wrong thing said to the wrong person would be sufficient reason to charge me with a crime.

In the United States, the Defense of Marriage Act was passed in 1996, clarifying that according to the federal government, marriage could only ever be between one man and one woman. It also promised that even if a state were to legalize same-sex unions, other states wouldn't have to recognize them if they didn't want to. And wow, they super did not want to, because between 1998 and 2012, a whopping thirty states had approved some sort of amendment banning same-sex marriage.

Every queer person who's older than about 25 watched this, knowing that this was aimed at people like them. Knowing that these votes were cast by their friends and their families and their teachers and their employers.

Some states were worse than others. Ohio passed their bill in 2004 with 62% approval. Mississippi passed theirs the same year with 86% approval. Imagine sitting in a classroom, or at work, or in a church, or at a family dinner, and knowing that statistically, at least two out of every three people in that room felt you shouldn't be allowed to marry someone you loved.

Matthew Shepard was tortured to death in October of 1998. For being gay, for (maybe) hitting on one of the men who had planned to merely rob him. Instead, he was tortured and left to die, tied to a barbed wire fence. His murderers were both sentenced to two consecutive life terms in prison. This was controversial, because a nonzero number of people felt that Shepard had brought it upon himself.

Many of us sat at dinner tables and listened to this discussion, one that told us, over and over, that we were fundamentally wrong, fundamentally undeserving of love or sympathy or of life itself.

This is a tiny, tiny sliver of history—a staggeringly incomplete overview of what happened in the US over about ten years. Even if this tiny sliver is all that there were, looking at this, how could you blame someone for wanting to try being not Like This? How can you fault someone who had sex, maybe even had a bunch of sex, hoping desperately that maybe they could be normal enough to be loved if they just tried harder? How can you say that someone who found themself an uninteresting but inoffensive boyfriend and went on dates and had sex and said that it was fine is somehow less valuable or less queer or less of a lesbian for doing so? For many people, even now, passing as straight, as problematic as that term is, is a survival skill. How dare you imply that the things that someone did to protect themself make them worth less? They survived, and that's worth literally everything.

Fifth, finally: What is a gold star, anyhow? You've capitalized it, like it's Weighty and Important, but it's not. Gold stars were what your most generous grade school teacher put on spelling tests that you did really well on. But ultimately, gold stars are just shiny scraps of paper. They don't have any inherent value: I can buy a thousand of them for five bucks and have them at my door tomorrow. They have only the meaning that we give them, only the importance that we give them. We’re not children desperately scrabbling for a teacher’s approval anymore, though. We understand that good and bad are more of a spectrum than a binary, and that a gold star is a simplification. We understand that no number of gold stars will make us feel like we’re special enough or good enough or important enough, or fix the broken places we can still feel inside ourselves. Only we can do that.

The stars are only shiny scraps of paper. They offer us nothing; we don’t need them. I hope that someday, you see that, too.

#queer stuff #lgbtq #gold star lesbians #long post #sorry #Anonymous

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bi-sapphics · 2 years

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super weird to me that some blogs are uncomfortable with making pride flag icons for characters that deviate from their canon identity and i'm gonna speak on it. just hear me out first!

i wanna firstly say that i understand their stance from their pov because it's entirely possible that someone would request such a thing for erasure reasons, but it usually isn't like that. it's just as possible (in fact more likely imo) that it's being requested so that someone can vibe with a character they like using their own flags. bisexuals can love catra, lesbians can love luz, in fact i would argue it's more serious erasure to take identity away from a real person by forbidding them from using a character pride icon that doesn't match their own (i'd get blasted if my icon featured catra in front of a lesbian flag because i'm not one?????? hello??).

like............ am i committing lesbian erasure by slapping the bi4bi twibbon on my current icon to match the scene's color palette and share an important aspect of myself relating to my blog's content, or am i required to put the matching les4les flag (if you're curious) on amity's side? or to just have a regular bi & lesbian split flag since lumity is a bi4les pairing? that's ridiculous! you sound ridiculous!

also very weird that you'll offer alternatives to avoid "harmful headcanons" that don't exist in these particular situations, like "oh you can't have a bi amity icon but you can use this trans/nby flag one since that's not confirmed canon!" or "oh but how about this split lumity icon with one bi flag and one sapphic flag?" like, no, if you feel more comfy that way for your own stuff then that's fine, but if i hypothetically want a bisexual amity icon that shouldn't be problematic. if you'd need me to specify my intentions on my profile or something, fine, but y'all are reaching so hard and it's resulting in as much discomfort to innocent ol' me as it is to you for no good reason.

i mention all this because i'm coming across such rules in icon/edit maker blogs i'd like to follow, which reminds me of a bi catra icon incident that happened on my previous old blog that resulted in a block before i got the chance to explain/defend myself. i don't actually want a bi amity icon (right now), that was just a hypothetical example. plus it's hypocritical anyway since i actually do see lesbian luz icons all the goddamn time without consequence, but that doesn't surprise me since any form of "bi erasure" (generally speaking here) is much more accepted online and thrown under the rug. people call her a lesbian all the time and i see tiktok edits of lumity using only the lesbian flag far too often and i think that's something we should be more worried about than someone's personal preferences.

tl;dr - character pride flag icons that deviate from canon aren't necessarily erasure due to them not being about the characters. "you must be x identity to like y character" rules are silly. stop gatekeeping, you're weird.

also if you're confused about any of this, please just ask me and i will clarify because i can guarantee that if you're angry with me you probably just misunderstood. i do not stand for lgbt erasure at all. i just personally don't think these instances are such. i do not wish catra was bi, amity bi, or luz lesbian. i do not disregard canon and change their own identies up. please communicate, it helps us both. thanks.

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