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caesium-55 · 2 months

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—seven days. [ iii ]

pairing: max verstappen x manager! reader.

summary: as the third time world champion, max verstappen's manager, you function on the belief that whatever max verstappen wanted, max verstappen shall get. but this time, after four years of working as his manager, you can't give him what he wants anymore and that was to stay.

author's note: hi hello welcome to part three. i flunked the quiz. lemme know what you think. NOT BETA READ. NOT EDITED. this chapter kinda sux. can't believe i went through a breakup just last week and i still cant write decent post-breakup scenes.

tags: @whatamidoingwithmylife-ramdom @eugene-emt-roe @bellezaycafe @barnestatic @theseerbetweenus @wcnorris @notyouraveragemochii @lpab hope i didn't forget anyone.

masterlist.

you: *sent a link*

him: ?

him: what's this

you: benefits of crying

you: read it it's enlightening

him: some people do not cry over a breakup you know and that is totally okay

you: why crying helps.

you: 1. tears release toxins, stress hormones to be specific. it is good to let all the bad energy out.

you: 2. it aids sleep. no need for further explanation.

you: 3. crying releases oxytocin and endorphins. i know you don't know what an oxytocin or an endorphin is but they're happy chemicals.

you: 4. crying helps you receive the support you need from the people around you. EMOTIONAL VULNERABILITY is okay, max. stop treating it like an STD.

him: it feels like an std

you: pussy

you: emotional vulnerability is a thing and it's normal so stop trying to be a big strong man when you're barely holding it together.

you: you may look fine now but i know you

him: please stop

you: no

you: 5. crying has a self soothing effect. very nice actually. it activates the rest and digest system.

him: what even is that

you: the parasympathetic nervous system

him: ??

you: this is why you shouldn't have dropped out of high school

you: education is important yknow

you: youre already lacking in three forms of intelligence, academic, emotional n social intelligence

him: fuck you im smart

you: fuck you 2 and yeah you're smart but only in geography

you: you probably can't do your taxes

him: im dutch so the company's account department do it for me by default

him: the american system is just weird

you: cant argue w/ u there

you: also, 6. crying helps restore emotional balance

you: see? you need that

you: yknow now that i think abt it you should consider seeking therapy

him: what makes you think i’m not in therapy right now

you: well have you considered getting MORE therapy?

You stand in front of the body mirror, holding the Red Bull polo shirt against your body to see how it looks on you for one last time. On your right sleeve, the word MANAGER is written in bold, white text. Because that was what you were. Just a manager.

In another universe this is not the shirt that you’d be wearing. The MANAGER would have been ENGINEER. In another another universe where your family has been well-off enough to continuously send you to karting school and you would have been the one driving the fucking car by now.

You know, if Max has even tried talking to Horner and suggested that you should be moved into the engineering team, then you wouldn't be stuck wearing this god-awful polo that burned your skin every time you wore it for work. Everybody reduced you as Max’s American manager and because you are American, most of them kind of just assumed that you're dumb, you know?

Does the world even know how smart you are? That you graduated top of your class, got the best thesis award, and that you had finished your masters just this year? Did they even know that a Japanese car company wanted you on their research team? That a NASCAR team wanted you on board as one of their engineers? Does Max even know?

Fuck no. He only knows that you're the best at ironing clothes and organizing his Google calendar and memorizing his entire coffee order by heart. He knew you're good at extinguishing kitchen fires and kicking ass in YSL Opyum heels. You doubt he knows that you can do Calculus in your sleep.

You can take it if the world puts you down for your appearance. But if the world puts you down because of your intellect? That's a different story. You'll take any insult to the face but not to your intelligence.

You have four days left in Monaco so you have begun packing already. You're right, everything did fit into three suitcases. Also, you haven't told Max yet. For some reason, you’re too anxious. Which is shocking to say the least because you never ever gets anxious when it came to Max Verstappen. You wouldn't have lasted this long working alongside Max if you were a pussy.

Max Max Max Super Max Max—

“[Name] here. Need anythin’, champ?”

Hearing a sob on the other end of the line immediately activates your fight or flight response. Your eyes widen and you toss the Red Bull shirt aside. Your legs leads you to the nearly empty shoe rack stationed beside the front door, grabbing the pair of shoes at the very top of the tiny shelf and throwing them on.

“I’m comin’ there. Hang on, Max. You wait for me, okay?”

He doesn't answer, just continuing to sob and the sound absolutely breaks your heart.

You run to his penthouse at a speed that will even put the RB19 to shame. Not even bothering to knock, you barge in and yell his name in the empty halls of his penthouse. You search in the kitchen. He's not there. The living room. Not there either. The room where his simulations are. Not there. You run to his bedroom upstairs.

The door is locked. Dammit. Panic overflooded your system.

“Max, sweetheart, you there?”

No answer, but you can hear a faint sound behind the door if you press your ear against the wood. Firefighter training covered how to open a fucking door when it was locked so this once again becomes a situation where you're grateful that you did that tiring and borderline suicidal volunteer work.

Max keeps a fire extinguisher inside his penthouse as per your advice. There is one stationed in almost every room inside his house. You knew there is one inside his room and another one just at the end of the hallway. You make a quick run for it and once you have the extinguisher in your hands, you run back to his door.

“Step away from the door!” you instructed while your mind mentally calculates your payment plan as you hit the door knob with so much force, the walls tremble at your strength. You're functioning on pure adrenaline. Your instincts only yell one thing and that is: go to Max. No one and nothing in this world will keep you from him. It isn't long until his bedroom door broke down. With one last final kick, it crumbles down from its hinges and you forcefully pry it open and sprint inside.

Max tucks himself in the tiny space in the corner of his huge bedroom, his knees shoved up to his chest. A 181-cm tall man trying to make himself as small as possible.

This is it. This is the bottled-up emotions he's been storing since Abu Dhabi. You cannot say you have not anticipated this. Max is bound to explode sooner or later.

Panic attacks have made a home in Max’s body since he was a child. That's what one gets when they’re parented by someone like Jos Verstappen. He killed Max’s soul and made the boy a machine and for what? To shape a child into a man, a racer that he wanted to be but failed to become at the cost of Max's mental health and childhood.

When Max looks up with that heartbreaking look on his face, you almost crumble. Almost, because you cannot crumble. Not when Max needs you.

Sometimes, you forget what it took for Max to become the champion that he is today. A childhood sacrificed for his dominance on the tracks. A whole lot of hatred from the people to become a WDC. And now, a love lost for his third consecutive championship.

“You came,” his voice cracks towards the end.

Your eyes soften, “You called, Max. Course I’ll come.”

You barely brace yourself for the impact that is Max’s body wrapping around yours in a tight hug. The man have literally launch himself from the floor to you at sixth gear speed. You stumble backwards slightly, holding his bed for support so the both of you won't fall down.

“Max—”

“No,” he whispers and his grip on your tightens as if he's afraid that you’ll slip away if he even tried to give your lungs space to breathe. “Don't speak. Stay.”

What Max wanted, what Max would get. So you shut your mouth, shuffle slightly so he'll be in a more comfortable position and allow him take whatever he wants from you. This will be the last chance he’ll ever do it anyway because in four days time, you’re flying to Texas.

You stay for what is probably hours in that position. Crumbled together on the floor, leaning against the side of Max’s king-sized bed. Your shirt is completely damp from his tears but you cannot even bring yourself to care about it.

“Your shoes…” It's the first time Max has spoken since the start of his meltdown.

“Hm?” you turn your head and your nose nuzzles against his hair, making you scrunch it up a little. His hair is tickling your nostrils. If you lean a little forward, your lips will meet the skin of his temple.

“They’re mismatched.”

Brows furrowed, your eyes move to your feet and see that Max is right. Your shoes are indeed mismatched. On your left is one of your Adidas slides and the other is your slip-on Skechers. You ran from one building to another in mismatched shoes. Fucking embarassing.

“Ignore them.”

Silence.

“You good now?”

“No.”

“Okay,” you say. “If you want to talk, I’ll listen.”

You hear Max let out a shaky breath, “Just stay for a while. Don't leave me alone.”

“Okay.”

Eventually, you manage to talk Max out of the hug. You're beginning to feel claustrophobic but you do not want to say it out right so you try to negotiate instead. That's how you and Max found yourselves inside his kitchen again. You're trying to replicate your Abuela's cheesecake, which she was known for back in Austin, and Max is…well, he's Max and he’s trying to be helpful in any way he can. If it's some other day, you'd have shoved him out of the way because you prefer working alone in the kitchen. Having eyes on you gives you anxiety. But given today’s circumstances, you do not have the heart to make Max leave so you task him with doing the little stuff like mixing things and throwing shit to the trash can nearby. And he does so splendidly.

“Thank you, by the way.”

“For what, baby?” You internally wince at your own slip of the tongue. Damn that habit of yours of calling people with affectionate call signs. Thankfully, Max seems to have not noticed it.

“For coming here.”

You shrug.

“I only did what you did for me in 2021.”

Again, your breakup with Leo was bad bad. You spent a month crying for a love lost and Max was there for you. For the most part, at least. You want him to focus on winning and winning alone that you pushed him away a lot of times but you appreciated how he was more obedient to your commands, that he held his tongue so he wouldn't piss you off even though he was not liking your words, and that he was considerate of you.

“I hope you won't go into fights though,” you chuckle. “Like I did after my breakup.”

He smiles, shaking his head lightly and you know he's recalling the memory. 2021 is a hilarious year for you, the Red Bull manager. You went viral after getting into a cat fight with a girl and a whole fist fight with her boyfriend.

You and Leo called it quits a week before Monaco and even though it had been four races since then, your heart was still in a quite fragile state at that specific race weekend. One minor inconvenience was enough to ignite a wild blaze of fire within you and nobody could extinguish the flames.

After Silverstone FP1, you were leading Max to the cool down room to brief him with Horner’s relayed instructions and someone had thrown a glass bottle towards the both of you while walking. Originally, Max was the main target of the bottle but you happened to have moved towards the line of trajectory and the bottle landed on your temple, hard enough that you stumbled upon impact.

You barely heard Max’s shocked gasp and shout of panic over the sound of glass shattering on your foot because the only thing you could register was the terrifying feeling of a thick liquid trickling down the side of your face and you didn't even need to see it to know it was blood.

The only thing you saw was red and it was on fucking sight.

Fucking Hamilton fan. Fucking Hamilton. He’s in Max’s way. He’s in your way. He’s the wall that was dividing you from your dream position in the engineering team.

You shoved the iPad you were holding to Max’s hands and marched down to the woman wearing the Merc #44 merch, swiftly jumping over the barricade and grabbing her by the collar of her pristine white Versace top.

The events that followed were too fast. You grabbed her collar. She pulled your hair. You also pulled her hair. Someone pulled her away from you. You tried to grab her, clawing her bare arms with your manicured nails. She screamed. You screamed back. You pulled out some curse words in Spanish as well because cursing her in one language alone is not enough. Her boyfriend appeared. A quick punch to your cheek. You fell to the ground.

The world stood still. There was a sting on your palm because your skin got torn from the hard surface of the concrete ground. You let a bloodcurdling war cry and your Dad would definitely be disappointed at you for using the boxing techniques he taught you for self defense purposes only to fight a guy two times your size.

Everything was a bigger blur from there. But you did remember the sensation of Max’s strong arms around you, stopping you from lunging forward again. He was saying sweet words to your ear to calm you down but your brain failed to intercept them so you could hear the words, could hear his voice, but not understand any of it. You remember Christian Horner's disappointed face that haunted you even two years later. You remembered feeling so terrified as you sat outside Christian Horner’s office waiting for the final verdict while he and Max and a few of the Red Bull higher-ups argued about your future with the team. You remembered hearing Max’s loud snarl on the other side of the mahogany door: “Did you see her face?! There was blood everywhere! On her nose, on her mouth, on the fucking side of her head!” You remembered the girl taking the case to court. You remembered fearing that you’d be sent to jail. You remembered that she lost the case because it was ruled as self defense and your injuries were grave. You remembered discovering that it was Max who used all his power and got the best lawyer to fight your case. You remembered the atmosphere in the Red Bull garage shifting when you entered it a few weeks later and everyone stared the bandages and bruises. Everyone thought one thing: of course, it would also take a monster to manage a monster like Max Verstappen. You remembered Lewis Hamilton, seven-time world champion, apologizing personally for the fight caused by his own fan. He didn't need to but he was so sincere with it that you cried when he handed you the apology flowers. God, how could you even hate this man? Your anger towards him was misplaced.

You’d been living with the guilt ever since, that you were horrifyingly violent for a day, that you were capable of killing for a day. And it could happen again. One day. God, you hoped you wouldn't have to see that day. You knew all your coworkers have been careful with angering you ever since. They're terrified of you even. Max should be, too. But then again, why would he when he already saw the horrors done by his father’s hands ever since he was a child? He was used to it.

“I won't,” he says, smiling at you. “I wouldn't want to add anymore problems for you to clean up.”

But you will not be the one cleaning it up because you resigned. You didn’t tell that to him though. Not right now. He just had a meltdown over Kelly leaving him and the news of his manager leaving him too will destroy him.

The cheesecake is a little burnt when you take it out of the oven but it actually adds more flavor to it so yeah, that's a win.

“We should drink,” you suggest.

“It’s mid-afternoon.”

“We drank at mid-afternoon yesterday,” you give him a blank stare. “With Alex and Charles, remember?”

He doesn't say anything as you make your way to his fridge and pull out two bottles of beer. Max has champagne stored somewhere but you have enough of those expensive champagnes. You need beer. Beer is good. Beer is nice. You're a beer type of person and it is time Max becomes one, too.

“I’m no scientist,” you begin, biting off the beer’s bottle cap. “But according to chemistry, alcohol is solution.”

Well, technically, edible alcohol or ethanol is not a mixture. Rather, it's a pure substance that happens to be a liquid at room temperature and typical atmospheric pressure. Pure ethanol is not a solution. Hard spirits though? That's a solution.

Beer is not a hard spirit. It's more of a fermented drink. But Max doesn't know that, though, so you don't bother explaining the science behind it.

Somewhere down the road, the two of you move to his living room. You use the Youtube app in his TV to search karaoke video and have the bestest time of your lives. You're screaming along some Daddy Yankee and El Alfa songs and Max doesn't know how to speak Spanish so he’s just vibing to it.

At 5 PM, you pull out Max’s expensive vodka bottle. Now this is the real shit. The ten bottles of beer? Those are just pregame. Max is already drunk with just those because he’s a pussy but you’re no pussy, so the only right answer is vodka! Viva la vodka or whatever.

Your throat gets tired of singing and Max gets tired from dancing, too, so you both decide to just go entertain yourselves in other ways. First, you introduced Max to beer-pong. He loses, of course. He sucks at everything not racing. Then, the two of you move onto chess. Max gives up mid-game. He cannot understand the rules. Then, lastly, you move to the billiard table Max owned. He only used it when the other guys are over and you do not even know why he bought it when he sucked at playing billiards.

“You know what Kelly said the morning before the race?” Max suddenly says and you look up at him, brow raising slightly. He’s drunk; his skin is flushed and he is all giggly and smile-y as he sits on the billiard table’s side rail and using the billiard stick as some sort of support stand to keep him from falling. You hope he won't accidentally poke himself. You're no better, too. Ten beer bottles and a few glasses of vodka. But you’re not as drunk as Max, and you still have a straight vision and you can still sink the colored balls into the pockets of the billiard table.

“Hm?”

“That it was unfair for her.”

You raise a questioning brow, “Why?”

“I bought shoes and they don't fit her.”

You blink. He laughs at himself as if he has uttered the funniest joke in the world.

“Three years of relationship gone because of a single pair of shoes,” he continues. “She wanted those shoes, too.”

Kelly….what the fuck?

“But that's okay. She….She made me open my eyes, you know? She made me realize what I truly love.”

“Racing.” It's not even a question. It's the truth.

Max stares at you, long and hard, and you look away first because you fear that if you allow yourself to stare too long, you’ll drown in those beautiful blues. This is enough heartache for the day. No need to add more.

“Hey [Name],” he begins. “If I asked you to kiss me, would you do it?”

#manager!reader #max verstappen x you #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen #f1 x reader #f1 imagines #formula one #fanfic #angst #mv1 #mv33 x reader #mv33

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sliceofajayke · 10 months

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enhypen as dads

here are some headcannons on how i think enha will be as dads :)

warnings; babies, talk of pregnancy, theres a mention of sex in hoons but nothing graphic.. thats all i think but plz lemme know if you see anything that should be added<3

likes, comments and reblogs are much appreciated<3

heeseung <3

-okok right from the beginning, when he had first found out u were preggers he started singing to ur belly

-and at night he cant sleep and he thinks ur asleep he'll talk to ur belly

-like if ure having really bad morning sickness he'll be like

-"hey baby,, i know ur growing in there but please dont give ur momma too much of hard time... we love you forever and always and we can't wait for you to get here"

-and suddenly the next day you got no morning sickness!! so hee kisses ur belly "thank u baby u always listen to dada huh?"

-okay now for gender. reveal!! he doesnt care if the baby is a boy or a girl

-he just wants to be able to hold his baby in his arms, and he got sososo excited when the doctor told yall so the doctor asks "oh were you hoping for a girl?"(first one is girl i feel like theyll all be really good girl dads)

-and u giggle "he wasnt hoping for anything specific. hes just happy that were this far along cuz that mean babes coming out soon"

-and we'll skip to birth. hee has done so much reading on parenting books, and all that jazz

-but when babygirl finally comes hes in tears and forgot everything he read. hes just too happy. he sees you holding his baby and he thinks, despite the sweat and tears. this is the most beautiful you look because you have been so strong and brave through out the whole process

-u call him over and ask if hes ready to hold her and something snaps in him "oh um... can i??"

- he just got so worried?? for some reason?? so the nurse smiles and tells him to go sit on the chair so she can pass her to him and while sitting he remembers skin to skin right right

-so he takes off his shirt and when baby is in the nurses arms she starts crying soso hard,

- but once baby was place into hees arms and lying on his bare chest she immediately stops "oh babygirl... hi its dada"

-and ik babies dont really smile unless they're pooping or smthng but the baby smiles at him with her eyes closed

-skip to her first everything,, hee has it all filmed, her first steps, her first taste of solid food, any of her first, you name it

-he'll be one of those dads who are sososo encouraging of every single thing she does

-(even if shes bad at it... "who cares what they say. if you like doing it then continue doing it. only quit if its for yourself not for them")

-shes a lovely singer, she'll somehow remember the songs hee would sing to her while she was in mommas belly and when she was a baby

-he'll cry when shes 10 years old because "my baby... shes not a baby anymore shes in her double digits:((" and she'll hug him even if she feels embarrassed and whispers to him "dont worry dad. i wont be a baby forever. but i'll always be your girl"

-thats what he calls her "my girl" he originally called u that

-and he still does,, whenever he gets home he goes "where are my girls?" or if his babygirl wins something he goes "thats my girl!"

-hes just a really good supportive dad:(( she'll even go to both her parents if shes having relationship problems because she can trust them and they are very trusting of her

jay <3

-ok so jay i think u’d just tell him straight up that ur pregnant

-u guys have been trying for a while and it finally happened so he was very very happy

-i think jay will also talk to ur belly

-he’ll tell baby a lot of random fun facts

-even tell baby about how big/small they are at the moment

-when baby comes hes just ready for it all.

-hes very encouraging of you, tells you that you did amazing before even taking a look at the crying baby

-finally when its his turn to hold his babyboy hes ready.

-the nurse takes the baby from ur arms and tells jay he can either stand or sit on the couch, he prefers to stand

-so he takes off his shirt and holds his arms out for baby

-jay cries while looking at his baby

- so baby is a bit older now, like hee. jay films all the firsts… and seconds

-baby is really smart too

-jay actually got his son an ipad

-but the kid is NOT an ipad kid, he’s actually very very good at time management???

-all the games on the kids ipad are actually some kind of learning games (reading apps, those crossword games, etc.)

-jay loves cooking and so does his son.

-it started from watching his dad cook

-to mixing the soup on the stove

-and finally to just jay watching and tell him what to do/add next

-actually on mothers day and ur birthday they’ll make u breakfast in bed

-their bond is very good<3

jake <3

-so lets say u nd jake already have some fur babies

-yall got two doggo okok so u dress them up wearing those ‘best big sister’ nd ‘best big brother’ sweaters

- “go to daddy” so they do:)

-with u following them slowly so you can see his reaction and he baby talks the dogs lol

-”now what are u silly babies wearing?”

-he takes them both on his lap and his eyes widened when he was able to read it,,

-the pups jump off his lap cuz jake sounded excited so they want to be excited too!!

-”no way…” he goes to run to you nd tbh he almost ran into you so he hugged u

-”is this for real? plz dont be a sick joke”

-”of course its real!”

-he kisses you

-a lot

-he kisses all over ur face nd all over ur belly

-so for this ultrasound its pretty late into the pregnancy and suddenly there are two heartbeat

-”oUR BABY HAS TWO HEARTS?!?”

- both u and the doctor laugh and tell him that has to mean twins

-so u guys go home and suddenly panic arises again

-”....i need to redesign the babyroom”

-u guys have a boy and a girl <3

- so both are very into music and sports

- he teaches them everything he knows and he loves loves LOVES bragging about his kids

- he doesn't do it on purpose but..

- heeseung is telling the group about how his daughter won at her school talent show and jake cant help but mention his kids

-”ohhh *son and daughter* love singing too! actually they’ve been practicing as a duo wanna see a video?!” (he’ll pull out the video before anyone can even say yes)

-hes very good at helping them regulate their emotions too, he lets them feel what it is and lets them talk about them openly

-he never raises his voice at them and if by chance his kids get so angry that they raise their voice at him??

-they’ll immediately apologize because they know its wrong and they’ll say that they promise to do their best not to do it again

-kids are hard especially if theres two the same age

-they argue a lot

- A LOT

- they always make up very quickly, jake and u don’t even have to interfere.

- BUT when u do have to interfere that means it gets really bad

- idk theyre kids so lets say they broke eachothers crayon :(

-both are crazy mad at each other, daughter is a daddys girl, son is a mommys boy

-first move as parents; get them to stop crying

-second to figure out why it all started

- “we wanted to share but we got mad”

- (y'all bought them each a set of crayons…)

- in the end, they make up and showed u their shared drawing of their family… with an extra member

“mommy and daddy we want a baby sibling”

sunghoon <3

-ok hoon wants a baby soooo bad

- he’ll always send u tiktoks of babies and their familes that show up on his fyp and goes like “could be us soon”

-what he doesn't know is that u are pregnant

-idk why u thought he wouldnt want a baby but thats what u thought

-anyway u talk to jay nd ur like “how tf do i tell him?? what if he doesnt want a baby?”

-*que sunghoon sending u another baby related tiktok*

-jay goes “... he spams u with baby and family tiktoks u really think he doesnt want that??”

-”maybe??” anyway so now u go home, thinking instead of how to tell him, not of a bad reaction from him

-finally u thought of it

-make a tiktok revealing it(not posting it publicly just yet. u just saved it to ur phone)

-tiktok is pictures with music first, pictures from ur first date, …post sex selfie(its a cute one ok like ur both smiley) of the date you most likely conceived baby

-then it comes to videos, theres one where u guys were making dinner and started dancing together,

-one where u guys are just smiling at the camera together then he attacks u w kisses

-finally the reveal of the pregnancy test and u at the end saying “im pregnant”

-so you send him that video while ur in the kitchen and hes on the couch living room

the text read “babe look at this cute baby video!!” and he clicks it so fast

-he watched it one… two… three more times and hes crying by the end of it

-”i love you so much!!”

-baby is now born and hes just the happiest hes ever been

-he has a baby boy:((

-i think he’ll record everything and anything his kid does and saves it all until his son is of age to consent to his parents to post his baby photos/videos

-his son loves it lol, he actually encouraged his dad to make an instagram for him so when hes old enough to post on his own he’ll post on that account

-but sunghoons account is basically u, his son, family photos and like a selfie every now and then

-he’ll encourage his son to do everything he wants.

-ur son wants to sing?? sunghoon will bring him to the studio and let him record a bit

-he wants to play soccer?? he’ll go to every single practice day and night

-he wants to ice skate?? hoon will be the best coach

-hoon will never ever force him though. if his kid wants out he’ll try to encourage them to keep trying but if they really dont want it, its over then

-hoon rememinds them if they ever wanna try again that they always can

-by the time his son is a teenager, hoon likes to think of himself as a dad and a friend

-so when his son comes to him with a problem hoon will ask “do you want dad advice first or friend advice first?”

-he’ll always give advice from both perspectives too so his son makes the final decisions on things based on that

-anytime u are out for business, they’ll have movie nights nd fall asleep on the couch together, ur sons head on hoons shoulder and hoons head resting ontop ur sons head<3

sunoo <3

-ok honestly see sunoo as such a good girl dad:((

-he found out u were pregnant before u even did lol

-he made u ur favorite food but u didnt want to eat it so he was like “???”

-he gets excited then says “i’ll be right back!”

-he left to get u take out and to buy some pregnancy tests. he lets u eat first then shows u the tests

-”if u arent we could always try again,, but i’m pretty sure u are” so u took a few

-all were positive

-sunoo smiles the biggest u’ve ever seen him smile

-he picks u up nd twirls u around

-so now ur going to ur 5 months ultrasound, u want to have a gender reveal party but sunoo just wants to know(he does want to have a party tho)

-he jokes with the doctor “if i slip u a signed photo card will u tell me the gender” that earned him a smack from u lol

-u give the envelope with the gender to two j’s cuz they volunteered the fastest

-as much as u guys like the whole blue for boy and pink for girls,, u didnt want that to be the colours so u did purple for girls and orange for boys

-jake and jay made cupcakes but somehow made them all brown…

-they forgot the food colouring lol

-anyway they whispered it to sunoo and sunoo begins to jump around “A BABY GIRRLLL”

-so now the birthing… sun couldnt control his face, this was a beautiful moment but gosh did it look…

-not so beautiful, but his babygirl is here!!

-after a little bit u tell him to lie next to u, he said there was no room so u made room

-”now there is room. lets look at our babygirl together” <3

-now her first birthday,,, sunoo couldnt help himself, he calls her princess so it was princess themed!

-she looked so cute in pigtails, her tiara and of course her little purple princess dress:((

-he also records everything at the party, hes vlogging it all

-so she grows up a bit nd he shows her the video as he does her hair

-”did mom do my hair or did u?” “ i did isnt it obvious?”

-“...dang dad thank goodness u got better at this” “excuse me young lady?” they laugh

-anyway now ur girl is hmm 16

-sunoo still calls her princess and she loves it. she gets princess treatment

-sometimes they even kick u out of the front seat so she sit beside her dad as she drives🤭🤭

jungwon <3

-wonie loves loves kids

-when he goes to film some content with kids he LOVES to send u little videos and pictures of him and the kids hes filming with

-when he gets home, u nd the 6 boys are there. u planned it all together

-so u ask him to check the oven cuz ur baking(u didn't actually bake it, u bought it lol)

-”babe its not even hot… are u sure u baked?”

-"oh wonnnie what did you just do?”

“...take bread out of the oven?”

-”jungwon its buns.. theres buns in the oven”

-”..what does that even mean”

-”...shES PREGENT WON.. BUN IN THE OVEN!!”

- he dropped the bread lol

-finally when it registered in his mind he ran to u nd hugged u “but why did u tell them first??”

-okay baby is born and hes in tears

-”are you okay?...our baby is crying and the doctors and nurses got him rn.” he says wiping ur hair out of ur face

-”i’m okay.. and i’m so happy but in so much pain ahaha”

-he smiled and kissed ur forehead, then ur nose nd finally ur lips.

-the nurse brings the now clean baby to u and gently places baby in ur arms

-”she looks so beautiful..” “she’s gnna grow up to be just like you y/n”

-jungwon was wrong. babygirl looks exactly like him but with longer hair hehe

-she even has his deep deep dimples, shes so cute when she smiles:((

-both of u cant even be mad that she looks like him(he realllyyy wanted a mini u when he gets a daughter)

-anyway now shes like 3? she loves calling her dadda for everythinggg

-she wants to play princess? dadda on his way

-she wants a piggyback ride for the 960427195 time? dadda is on his way

-she still counts on him always now that shes older, just now she calls him dad.

-dad always drops anything and everything for her.

-dads filming some content but his personal ringtone for his babygirl goes off. hes outta there

-she loves to dance too!!

-actually she watches jungwons dance from i-land(she hasnt watched the show yet but she seen a lot of the happier clips/edits)

-she tries to copy it a lot cuz she wants to be just like him dancing wise

-anyway shes a total daddys girl

(uncle) ni-ki <3

-alright we know ni-ki is… well you know how ni-ki is

-but he is the best babysitter ever!!

-he’ll come over without even getting asked to lol

-”hi guys i’m here to babysit!”

-”...but ni-ki we weren't even going out today..”

-”yeah well i got bored so get out of here so i can hang out with my minis”

-so they leave ni-ki with the children

- ni-ki is actually a really good babysitter, he knows how to have fun but also knows when things get too far

- “alright kiddos show me where your parents hide the candy. we get 2 pieces each after a healthy dinner”

-he knows his hyungs hide the candy high up cuz the kids cant reach it

-when things get out of hand, he will never ever raise his voice.

-he’ll give a big sigh and the kids just know to stop what theyre doing and to listen to him

-he wont ever use 'negative’ words i.e instead of “no fighting” he’ll say smthng like “lets all get along”

-then he sets up some music for them to dance to

-if they ask him, he’ll dance with them too

-they’ll even ask him to teach them and he happily will teach them

-hehe the kids will request to learn billy poco heheh

-ni-ki hates it but teaches it nonetheless

-once theyre all tired out (including ni-ki) they all sit on the couch and put on a movie

-they all fall asleep on ni-ki :)

-all the parents have pictures of ni-ki nd their kids sleeping

-actually all the kids come together and make like a slideshow of all the fun they’ve had with their favorite unlce for his birthday:)

tags; @criceofpain @celeste-hoon @jaylaxies @ajayke-reads

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lavenoon · 9 months

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Kindled Spirits AU

Soulmate AU revamped with a Y/N <3

Basics: Soulmate bonds are 1) not necessarily romantic, 2) not a given and not always between just 2 people, 3) not necessarily reciprocal (rare, but happens) Basically soulmates are bonded via dreams - meeting within dreams, or dreaming of each other’s memories, anything in dreams is fair game Plays a year after the pizzaplex fire and given that I had the idea a good while ago none of the dlc is included in the premise, also bc this is based on an old self insert fic Y/N is extremely audhd because that I refuse to take out

Y/N has spent most of their life assuming they don’t have a soulmate, which is a relief because they’re plagued by nightmares/ stress dreams a lot. They got used to those, and when some other hazy dreams crop up later in life they don’t think much of it.

Then one night they dream of burning. An indoor playground, they stand in the middle of it, filled with hopelessness and self hatred they cant explain (the irony of Sun burning to death). They don’t feel alone though, and though they can’t see anyone else, they know someone else is there. It's both a comfort as well as agonizing, and the care for that other person is evident, despite the whole emotional cocktail. They go through the entire dream incapable of changing anything, and then wake up still feeling hot but also cold and clammy, phantom flames still licking at their skin. All while they cope with the idea that maybe they did have a soulmate, and that is now past tense.

For an entire year they go around thinking they witnessed their soulmate(s?) burning to death via dream, not telling anyone about it but carrying that guilt.

They move, and find a new job - the Pizzaplex is hiring! No one wants to be a security guard anymore after all that weird shit a year ago, so even though Y/N lacks the qualifications, they get hired. Rotating shifts, day (morning/ afternoon) and night. The first time they walk past the daycare, it flashes into flame - but no, that’s just coincidence. It’s the first indoor playground they’ve seen since then, it’s hazy dream memories worsened by guilt, it’s not the same.

Y/N befriends the daycare attendant, and the naptime attendant - they talk to Sun sometimes through the slide, and Moon usually bothers them on their security rounds. They do meet Sun first, after trying to be helpful throwing down some stray ballpit balls down the slide, and a curious Sun crawls up just to get a ball to the face. Y/N feels very bad about that, and given their lack of scripts for how to interact with animatronics, they just fall back on the scripts they already have. Sun doesn't seem to mind, so it's all good! Then one night they shout a belated "Good night!" down the slide, after the lights in the daycare have turned off, and barely avoid falling when suddenly Moon stands behind them, asking them just what they're doing. He makes his dislike of their flashlight promptly known, and then they have a menace of a shadow for their rounds.

That goes on for a couple weeks, until Sun asks them inside of the daycare to address a few concerns they could please relay to management?

And then the perspective is just undeniable. Y/N gets caught in the flashback, seeing it all burn again, and Sun startles them out of it. They don’t tell him. They can’t. But they realize that he’s been forced to work in a direct replica of the place where he burned to (temporary) death.

After that they keep trying to broach the topic of soulmates in general, but Sun and Moon are very much convinced that as animatronics they are not people, and they can’t dream anyway, so how would they have a soulmate? So silly!

Dreams and personhood are very connected in this AU - with dreams linking souls society just assumes that anyone without dreams is not a person. (Is this a societal issue for other humans who don't dream? Sure! People are people and will exclude others for any reason!)

Meanwhile Y/N starts having more dreams - they assume because now they live closer, actually met their soulmates, there’s less of a barrier to only have the super traumatic stuff make it into their dreams. In fact, they are kind of relieved that their usual nightmares are exchanged for extremely mundane “watching kids play in the daycare” or watching themself being bothered by Moon from his POV.

It’s a struggle trying to convince their soulmates that they are in fact people, while wondering if the bond is reciprocated because how would they tell? Sun and Moon can’t dream, there’s no confirmation that Y/N is their soulmate too! Lots of fear of rejection that’s holding them back here

But also some shenanigans at this time, like Y/N knowing that Moon follows them on their routes, and calling him out on it when he tries to stay hidden. He asks how they knew, and they bluntly reply “it came to me in a dream”. Moon laughs, then asks for the truth that they don’t know how to give after he rejects it so easily. They end up deflecting and he goes back to being a menace.

Also Y/N being somewhat anxious once they realize that Sun uses "friend" for many people (whenever they do see him interact with adults, which isn't often) and awkwardly ask for confirmation because oh no what if he's just being polite and they read too much into it? They almost regret it when he proves that Moon isn't the only menace and makes sure they know he considers them their friend after! Moon continues being a cat in his affections, so when Y/N asks him the same he ends up positively surprised, somewhat guilty (due to the secrets he keeps, and the danger he still believes he poses), but mostly ramps up the friendly annoying to the max

And then Y/N ends up impulsively telling Moon. He wants them to be joking - asks them to, even, to take it all back. When they refuse he reacts more in anger and accuses them of deluding themself, suggesting they need medical attention. They get angry then, too, because is he really telling them to go to a doctor after they confess something like this? It ends badly, with Y/N fleeing the scene and then avoiding both Moon and Sun for a good while.

Until Sun requests their presence about a “security issue” in the closed daycare, and Y/N goes even knowing he’ll want to talk. He’s concerned more than angry, but disbelieving all the same. Y/N’s patience is running thin when Sun, desperately, asks them just what they were dreaming about to be so convinced - what made them think they're linked to an animatronic like that? - so they tell him about the fire. They also tell him that they were telling the truth that one time with Moon. Sun (and Moon) get their own flashback, and Y/N ends up frantic, apologizing for bringing it up like that, while the boys are just terrified that

1) Y/N had to see that, experience it via dream

and 2) just what else could they have seen?

Moon in particular is terrified - he approaches them a bit later, asking about other dreams they might’ve had. Even says “they would have been nightmares”. He assumes that Y/N must have witnessed the virus induced murders and has no idea how to assure them that he’s not that, after he reacted in so much anger at their initial confession. His concern doesn’t really lessen, and more shifts upon being told that “I wouldn’t know, all my dreams are nightmares anyway”.

Mostly themed around growing closer after that, and working around “we don’t need to dream of you to know we like you, and we do!” as well as uncovering the past trauma Sun and Moon have gone through (and are going through, still trapped in the same building in a replica of where they burned).

Also Sun and Moon struggling to accept their personhood because if they’re people, then they are traumatized and were (and are being) mistreated for a long time, and that’s also hard to come to terms with. Some thoughts towards animatronic emancipation though I never got that far in the fic, so mostly comfort and slice of life as they work around the little bump in the road of their soulmate bond. Y/N opening up about their own dreams, and why it's so difficult to say they had any nightmares based on Sun and Moon's experience before the literal death experience not just breaking the ice but rather melting it at record speed

Would remain platonic/ ambiguous because it was very important to me that soulmates aren't necessarily romantic, and they all have bigger fish to fry than whether or not they'd like to go on dates - given that that's hardly an option while Sun and Moon cannot leave the Plex. The reassurance and relationship beyond the bond actually is the most important part, with Y/N admitting to both Sun and Moon and also themself that they enjoy having them as soulmates, of course! But they'd be friends with or without those dreams, given that Y/N initially approached them both before they even realized. Which is also a relief, because Sun and Moon do feel bad over not being able to confirm that it's reciprocated - they feel like it is, they want it to be (and isn't that the most important part?)! But they don't know. And that's okay - because they found each other, dreams or not, and they won't lose that <3

This is as much as I have right now, and as much as it'll stay for the time being! Enjoy <3

#post let luce #dcamv #kindled spirits #lmao have fun reading this whole thing is 1.7K words #and i mean. the doodles #speaking of.#my art #you can see the aroace (?) jumped out when I tried to make a soulmate AU I could stomach #needed to doodle something yesterday and just. kept thinking abt my year old abandoned self insert fic hfjdks #from before i even joined the public fandom too #felt like it'd be fun though #soulmate aus *are* fun but I also like looking at complications in them #so I made them hurt (:#a little. bc its me. so we get comfort #anyways yes #new au! enjoy! <3

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lezoftheirown · 2 years

Text

re: passing & gender expression

so they get the uniforms & its the first time a lot of them realize how baseball is like not their safe zone to be masc anymore & it really shows who Is vs Isn't used to needing to pass as femme sometimes. then also! how they try to dykeify their uniforms by like rolling the sleeves or leaving a button undone or wearing it halfway up... or also what they wear under their uniforms so like slightly longer shorts or masc undershirts/t-shirt with high collar

then later in charm school it was like Real and theres now Stakes & situations they will b put in where passing as femme is Required in order to stay on the team/be safe at all from the police...

so u have characters like clance & maybelle & shirly who their femininity and classic expressions of their womanhood are so inherent to them and have never been something to think about, they even make comments about being more brash/fun/outgoing than they seem & feeling underestimated in that way. so like 0 worry about seeming suspicious/passing.

Then u have the femme dykes like greta & carson & gracie whose classic femininity has lots of aspects that feel natural & true & fulfilling but also the layer of using it as a safety mechanism & being worried about it not being enough or being too much. so like knowing that parts of their femininity need to be deliberate and also knowing that there are stakes & it Can be questioned makes passing for them just as important, even if it is easier to pass

(also when u realize ur queer u learn that gender rolls are bullshit so u end up finding which ones fit you specifically, which ultimately affects your expression regardless of masc or femme)

i think that gracie & greta both love being high femme but also know that its safest that way & know how to protect those without that safety but Also still need to code switch to appease general society. they both feel confident & true as feminine but not complete without the queer parts of it.

Carson and max are sort of in between where they never questioned their femininity before & it came naturally to them but not in like a super enthusiastic way or in a way that they enjoyed. throughout the season we see them each incorporate aspects of masc style which felt right and also in turn made their feminine styles more considered, especially loved the futch moments of putting together parts of both.

then theres masc characters like lupe & jess & bert & jo... firstly i Love how varied their experiences are but r all so true to queer masculinity:

so jess has prob never had to pass or been asked to be anyone but who she is ever. like they have Def experienced queer hatred & bigotry but being raised on a farm with brothers near a city with a queer scene, she has prob never had to like put on makeup or anything until the peaches. then she quickly realizes how high the stakes are when that one girl gets kicked out for being too butch & she has to like barely squeeze by and force herself to pass.

Jo is obviously really used to passing and is very familiar with code switching & hiding parts of herself when she has to. like she just allows the uniform to have nothing to do with her personal style & just tolerates it until she can take it off. or in the charm school she just does it & gets it over with

with Lupe u can tell she has had to pass before, probably in a church setting, but she knows it takes a Lot of focus & effort to really pass. in the charm school shes like so tense & tries so hard & probably just barely flies under their radar. even when they're all walking around later she cant reel her focus back in.

then throughout the series we see them learn when they can get away with dressing masc and when they have to femme it up. like the scenes in a group when theyre out on the town, the more masc teammates still keep their mens shoes & wear toned down dresses & no handbag or hat. or going to the movies where jess is like regular mens clothes but lupe and jo are both dressed lightly femme (obvi jess figured she could get away with it in a dark theatre).

but this is when its important to have a character like Bert who will absolutely not compromise his identity for anyone else's comfort or even for his own safety. honest expression comes before anything

then in the queer bar scenes & the drinking at home scenes we get to see true expressions & authentic comfort & confidence and its like such a breath of fresh air. the actors did so good showing the difference & ease that comes with dressing truly

#a league of their own #jess mccready #lupe garcia #carson shaw #max chapman #greta gill #dyke #lgbt #aloto #lesbian #butch #femme

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pokemon-ash-aus · 1 year

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I absolutely ADORE your Teacher Assistant!au, do you have anymore art or hc's for it?

I dooo!!! God what did i write last time? I dint remember so here's a lil baby Eevee eventually evolving!!

Headcanons:

-Ash's Aura isnt something he can turn off EXCEPT when he's under extreme stress or duress that he can't handle. It's akin to a Sensory Overload for him, everything gets muted and it feels like he looses his ability to hear and see even though its still there.

- Pikachu is crazy expierenced and strong, he doesnt tell the Newbies that he's beat up legendaries because he wants them to see him as the fun- if slightly crazy- friend and partner!

- Ash actually has a lot of Eggs back at the farm because of his pokemon either, a) Populating or b)finding eggs at random.

-Because screw Gender evo's. Gender Specific pokemon have a branched evo that is either Nonbinary or including a Male line. The primary account being Bounsweet!

- Ash's Pokemon all know (at least) one move out of their Species normal repitoire. Bukbasaur with Dig and Gust, Charizard with all 3 Elemental Punches, Squirtle with Dragon Pulse. They're not overly good with it, its a lot of testing and mostly used as a last minute resort wih lots of build up.

-The kids recognize that Ash isnt that much older than them and they know he's barely considered their senior but they cant help but admire how he acts and talks and the stories and lessons he can teach. Its better when Ash fully admits he doesnt understand something and asks them questions about it, it makes them feel like he truly sees them as friends (he does)

-There's another student joining in that has yet to be seen (But they are a canon character) mostly for an even amount of students.

- Ash and Lusamine have major beef with eachother. Its hatred on first sight. They do not become friends, they don't become buddy buddy, Ash barely tolerates her and even that drops when she's good and grants the students Ultra Guardian status. *They're CHILDREN Lusamine!*

- Ash is very touch affectionate with his students. Pats of affirmation, small side hugs, shoulder nudging etc. He's not onto full on hugs of comfort, that gives him the heeby jeebies but its still more affection than most of the students are used to.

- Dont be fooled Ash may be expierenced and has stories to boot, But he's still an idiot. "That's an Oxymoron!" "Dont call the strategy a moron, they cant defend themselves!"

- Ash typically defaults to it for Pokemon until he knows them personally. He's especially vicious with correcting older folk on pronouns just to piss them off, most pokemon dont really care but at times its a sweet gesture, especially if the folks are particularly nasty.

- Ash has met Viren before and vice versa. It was a brief meeting on a boat and both of them left extremely bitter about it. Ash comoletely forgot about Viren but Viren remenbers Ash as that "15 year old Brat!" its extremely funny to have a one sided hatred when the other party barely remenbers you

- Ash is bad at matching names to faces, but its not malicious. If you dont see him everyday, he's bound to forget

- Ash and his pokemon speak a lot of languages, but only he and Pikachu can really read, and even then its still trial and error. He has a lot of moments of pausing and trying to translate on slower days.

- Pikachu has trained to be able to feel aura and see like his partner. Its no where near as strong as Ash's and it drains him fast, but he wants to know what Ash sees and feels.

That's all i got for now :D

#pokemon #teachers assistant au #Ask

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iavenjqasdf · 4 months

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🖨clones🔨

my fucking cloning machine is defective; it keeps making "me"s, and i fucking hate that guy.

i'll just be minding my own business, going about my day, when i hear a ZAP! from the other room, and i sigh, cause i know that means i have to drop everything im doing and go subdue another fully-grown newborn me. For some reason they're always born terrified and trying to kill themselves as quickly as possible, and i cant just let them go out into the world and make a mess and ruin my good name, so i developed a system; i knock it out with my favorite heavy shovel, and then i drag its sleepy body out of the closet it was born in and down to the basement while it's unconscious, listening to the thonk thonk thonk as it hits its head on each step on the way down, and i leave it down there in the dark, next to all its clone buddies.

(protip if you find yourself in a similar situation: invest in a good shovel as soon as you can. you don't want something flimsy that'll break in the middle of a pacification. i had to strangle one with my bare hands before i learned that lesson. not fun!)

i usually do a pretty good job keeping them contained where i don't have to think about them, but sometimes they start screaming or crying or whatever, loud enough that i can hear them even through the doors and hallways between us, so i have to turn on the gas down there, until eventually they quiet down and go to sleep. sometimes they die, but i just leave the corpses down there nowadays, cause sometimes they come back to life, and hauling a carcass up the basement steps and through the house and into the backyard is a whole thing and if it's gonna claw its way out of the ground again anyway i might as well save myself the trouble. the living ones cry about the smell sometimes but i don't let the haters get to me.

i don't know what they get up to down there; i only ever open the door when i have to toss another guy in there, and obviously i have to gas them first to make sure they don't try to mob up on me and escape, so i only ever see them unconscious. there's shit smeared on the walls and weird symbols that i guess they carve into each other using their grotesquely overgrown fingernails, but being a full time caretaker is enough of a hassle without also having to put in the effort to understand what the fuck they're trying to communicate.

i tried turning the machine off and on again, then just leaving it off permanently, then straight up unplugging it, but nothing really seems to work. i can leave it in the most pristine perfect unpowered condition and think im finally safe and then one day ZAP! it's made another guy, and i have to go through the whole fuckin routine all over. really takes a toll on a guy, having to bludgeon something with your own face and voice unconscious before you even finish your morning coffee.

i also tried breaking it, but that just made the clones start coming out broken, too. if you thought they were annoying in vanilla form, just wait till you get one with half its skull concave, or with limbs growing out of the wrong places. i don't get cognitohazard pay for having to see and subdue those abominations. so i don't fuck with the machine anymore, because with my luck, i'll just end up making things even worse if i try to fix them again.

mostly i just wish i had some help, but i haven't been able to find any so far. it's kinda hard to make friends or get second dates when you're constantly exhausted from pacifying a basement full of retarded suicidal clones of yourself. recruiting from within doesn't work, either; i can't bribe them, because the only thing they want is to die, and i can't threaten them, because they'll start just begging for whatever punishment i think of and that weirds me out.

it's reached a sort of shitty equilibrium, where the machine spits em out at pretty much the perfect rate to maintain a stable population. whenever one of them dies, the others will eat the corpse, which is cool cause then i don't have to worry about that one coming back, but it also means the rest all get fed and continue living.

i know what you're thinking; yes, i've already tried forcing a conscious one to eat all the unconscious ones at gunpoint once. it just grabbed the gun out of my hand and shot itself through the skull, and then came back a week later anyway. ungrateful bastard.

it's starting to smell pretty bad all the time down there, too. all their waste products piling up, i bet. i wish i could just leave the gas on all the time so i wouldn't have to worry about it, but eventually it starts leaking through the cracks in the basement and filling my parts of the house, too. i guess i could just pack up, turn the gas on, and leave, but the bill will eventually come due, and if they shut it off then even bigger complications will emerge.

besides, a house this big, for this cheap, in this neighborhood? i can't afford to NOT be doing this. i just wish i had someone to share it with, besides myselves.

ao3

#📝#guro #original fiction #standalone

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loveackermannn · 1 year

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Can u maybe do a college au levi x reader where they're super close friends with feelings for one another. And there's this project they have to work on and reader is struggling. She's never really been good with grades and she's barely passing her classes.

She gets super frustrated and starts pulling all nighters for a whole week to get the project done. She starts skipping meals and isn't hanging out with Levi as much anymore. Saying that he's super worried is an understatement. Hes never seen you like this.

One night while you were working on ur project, he got up and off of the top bunk and walked up to your desk (you both share a room). He began slowly massaging ur shoulders, telling you to go to sleep already.

After a lot of bickering back and forth, you agreed. You both cuddled against each other and fell asleep. It was the best sleep hes had in a long time.

Have a nice day♡♡

☰ MORE THAN ENOUGH.ೃ࿐𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐢 𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

It wasn't supposed to get this bad – It wasn't.

While you did expect the late nights to bleed into the early hours of the morning considering how much you decided to dedicate your time for the final semester project, you didn't think it would be difficult. But fuck, was it draining you to the absolute core. On top of that, it didn't calm the fact that you were on the edge of final grades as you couldn't manage past a C+. You were trying your best, you really were.

And one person could very well see that on the sideline.

"Hey."

You instinctively jolted at the husk of the voice you could only recognize as your best friend who held nothing but earnest and concern. He rested his head in the palm of his hand as he peeked from the top bunk of your shared bed, comfortably dressed in sweats and a plain shirt. He'd been eyeing you from a distance, not wanting to disrupt the groove you had going on for a few hours – but that was the issue. You had been glued at your desk for god knows how long and he can't even recall the last time you actually sat down for a meal with him.

Visibly, he seemed cross with you for completely neglecting your needs.. and admittedly, him too. You spare him a glance once your attention was directed away from the damned laptop that Levi internally despised for keeping you up so many nights in a row – Childish it may seem, but all he wanted was for you to take a break.

"What is it, Levi? I really need to finish this project or I won't pass the class. You already know how my grades are looking right now, I cant afford-"

Suddenly, you felt the sheets ruffle from above as he began to make his way down the ladder and over to your desk. Your eyes finally met his for the first time in a while and from what he could tell, your undereyes darkened with each day and night that passed – It was almost as bad as his.

His features softened only for you while two fingers hooked underneath your chin, forcing your gaze upwards to him.

"When was the last time you slept?"

"I don't.. know," you shrug, wanting to look away in shame for knowing well that you hadn't been taking care of yourself the way that you should have. But, he kept your head trained exactly where he wanted. He narrowed his eyes to you and decided to press on more – with such gentleness, of course.

"Hm. You know it's not good for you to be doing this. I understand you have a lot to do, but cramming all of it in a number of days isn't healthy. You could've just asked me to help you, you don't have to go through this alone."

You knew he had you. There wasn't much you could say nor object – the papers and assignments on your desk were long forgotten the moment he spoke out to you. His palm traced down to your shoulder as you couldn't do anything but merely give into his careful touch.

"Turn around, I'll ease up your neck and shoulders. Is that okay?"

"Of course."

Your body faced back to your now dimly lit computer and you soon came to realize how strained your eyes felt to any sort of brightness. So, you opted for closing your eyes entirely as Levi worked out the tender knots and muscles that have built up over the past week. It felt so good to finally relax like this.

"Damn, you're tense. All 'cause of that fucking laptop.."

You groaned in response while he continued his ministrations on your back and neck, to which he softly smiled to himself – You deserved to rest.

"I want to pass though, Levi..."

At that, it caused him to raise a brow at you questionably, wondering why you put so much pressure on yourself when you've been doing the most these past few months to achieve your goal. "You are passing. I don't understand why you're so fixated on your grades when you're not even failing."

You took a breath, "You don't get it. I want to get better grades than last semester. Or else.."

He paused for a moment, turning you back around to face him directly and his hands continued to rest on your shoulders as he waited patiently for you to finish.

"Or else what?"

"I'll be a failure..."

Oh that did it for him.

Immediately, your face met the hardened surface of his chest while his arms wrapped around you tightly – safe, warm and secure. It's what you've craved for a really long time.

"Listen to me closely, yeah?" He feels you nod against him which gave him the cue to continue, "You're not a failure, you hear me? No matter what those shitty grades come out to be, it doesn't and will never define who you are. Your hard work has already proven how determined you are and you're not giving yourself as much credit as you should be. You're too hard on yourself. Let me take care of you for now, okay doll? You can rest for a while, you've done more than enough and I'm so damn proud of you."

It was rare for Levi to ever console someone like this, but only for you would he ever keep you safe within the home of his arms whenever things get rough or even when it had been a long day for the both of you. You missed this and every word that he spoke, rang through your ears with nothing but the truth.

You felt bitter tears prick at the corners of your eyes as he only embraced you tighter, not daring to let go in the slightest. Your own arms finally lifted from your sides, coming to wrap around his waist to further secure you into him. Soft sobs were muffled into the fabric of his shirt, but he made no move to let you cry anywhere else.

"I'm sorry.. I just got too carried away and I haven't been communicating with you and-"

He pulls away to cradle your face in the calloused, but gentle palms of his hands, wiping away the streams of tears that trailed down your face, "Shh shh, it's okay doll. You're okay, just take deep breaths for me. In and out.."

Everything was always going to be okay with him.

Wordlessly, he tugged you along into the living room where the two fo you shared many movie nights and midnight talks – a space of comfort that felt familiar. Levi laid down first, then opened his arms as an invitation for you to finally settle down on him.

You wasted no time in making yourself comfortable on his chest, finding a spot on the crook of his neck to rest your head. His hands met the small of your back with his fingers threading through the delicate strands of your hair. While you felt your eyes come to a close, Levi's lips brushed against your forehead and his hand reached up to smooth your hair back as he quietly whispered, "I've got you. I always will."

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radical-ghostface · 2 years

Note

Ryan Erzahler NSFW Alphabet 😆✊🏾 my boy barely gets any love and i dont understand why😭😭 love your fics btw😌❤️

No cause you're literally so right. I barely ever see any ryan smut or nsfw content so here you go! I hope its good!

☆ RYAN ERZAHLER NSFW ALPHABET ☆

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

I think ryan would be the type to be really sweet after sex. Like he would caress your face and give you that lil smile he does, and kiss you really gently. Ugh i just know hes the cuest thing.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favourite of his own would be his hands. He knows they're hot.

And for his partner I think either smile or eyes. And a lil ass 😏

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Hes for sure a cum in your mouth kinda guy. Either that or i can see him wanting to cum on your back.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

I think he listens to nsfw audios. And would maybe even secretly make a few himself 👀

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Honestly i dont think Ryan is very experienced. Hes not a very social person and i can see that affecting his relationships/sex life. So i feel like he only really has sex with people that he connects with.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying.)

Doggyyyyyy. 100% you cant change my mind. Giving AND recieving.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Ryans more of a serious guy when it comes to sex. Not a lot of joking around or bing goofy but hes not all serious. The right partner would bring it out.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Clean shaven for sure.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

I feel like he would start out kind of stiff or awkward and then once he eased into it and got more comfortable he would be super passionate. Very into the moment, and possibly very heated.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Ryan doesn't jack off very often at all. Maybe once a week? If that. He doesn't have a super high sex drive.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Neck. Biting.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

Almost always at home or in a bed. He would turn down a car fuck though 😏

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Nerds. Lol no but like someone intelligent, we all know this man is a himbo okay? He need someone smart to balance him out. So i can see him sitting there listening to his partner talk about something he has no idea about (ex. Quantum physics 😏) and literally all he hears is gibberish because all he can think about is how hot the words sound coming out of their mouth. Know what i mean? Does that make sense? 😬

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Bondage. Its deffinitely not something he would feel comfortable with, like it just wouldnt turn him on at all.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

This man would never turn down a good blow job. Hes nore of receiver than giver but he knows what hes doing with his mouth

P = Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Ryans the kinda guy who likes it intense, like passionate af. He loves to get really into it and just kinda lose himself to the passion and his partner.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Hes not really a quckie kinda guy but he'll deffinitely do it if his partner asks.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Not a huge risk person, but he would experiment. Especially with threesomes. Dont ask me why, it just makes sense lol

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

I think ryan could go a solid 3 or 4 rounds before he couldn't cum anymore

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Hes always down to try different toys. He even has a few himself.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

This boy LOVES to be teased and over stimmed. To the point where his jaw is clenched and hes drooling just a lil 😏

But not much of a teaser himself.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

Pretty quiet, he grunts and moans a lil but hes pretty tame.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

This man likes fucking in water. Period.

Also a slight mask kink 😉 cmon he loves horror, tell me he wouldnt love to be fucked my ghost face or michael myers.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Im gonna say hes somewhere around 7-8 inches, with it being more lengthy than girthy

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Again ryans sex drive isnt too high but it really all depends on his partner and the situation.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

I feel like he would stay up for a sold hour or so to cuddle and make sure his partner felt comfortable and loved ❤ few face/head and shoulder kisses and when he feels satisfied he'll let himself drift off.

#the quarry #the quarry game #the quarry x reader #hacketts quarry #the quarry requests #alphabet #justice smith #ryan erzahler #ryan erzahler x reader #ryan erzahler smut #ryan erzahler headcanons #ryan erzahler headcanon

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krikeymate · 11 months

Note

In the werewolf au

What if Christina was actually a werewolf and tara just didnt get the gene? Or because of her size she is unable to wolf out/shift?

One night on the full moon christina comes to their house and she grabs tara and obviously tara cant fend off a huge werewolf so she starts getting carried by the scruff and shes trying to take tara home after abandoning her because she couldn’t wolf out. Sam comes and tries to stop christina and they fight and tara is so small compared to them that she ends getting hurt in the process. Sam is able to scare Christina away and when she looks down she sees her little sisters body in her barely conscious state….

(This doesn’t go with my ask but imagine if tara is eventually able to shift into her wolf form but because of her size shes looks just like a small wolf pup 🥺)

Listen, listen... late-bloomer Tara. I already have a plan for fangs for the support - yeah you fuckers never offered anything better so the name has stuck now, way to let me down guys 😞 - but this is SO GOOD that actually now I'm making a split timeline ALREADY. It probably differed enough that I could give it a whole other name but I'm just gonna split it A and B.

Tara has always been a poor excuse for a wolf.

Most wolves transform by the time they're 5. Sam was 3. At 8 years old, Tara hasn't shown a single sign of transforming. No claws, nor fangs, not a single extra hair on her body. Her nails are blunt and her teeth are dull, her eyesight is ordinary and her hearing is poor. I mean, she has asthma for Selene's sake. What sort of wolf has asthma? None. Except Tara.

Tara's not a wolf at all, she knows, no matter how much Sam tries to convince her otherwise. With every full moon that passes, her mother gets angrier, her father gets more distant. The other kids won't play with her anymore, because only pack can play with pack, and if you're not a wolf, you're not pack.

They drill it into them over and over in their lessons. Only wolves are pack, no humans allowed. Humans are threats. Tara asks her father once what happens if a cub never transforms, and he laughs and tells her that all wolves transform by the light of the moon eventually, there are none that don't. He tells her not to worry, and that her own mother had been a late bloomer herself. She had been 7! That was a year ago. He looks at her suspiciously now, like she's done something wrong, like she wouldn't give anything to be normal.

There's another full moon tonight, Tara doesn't even bother joining her family downstairs. She doesn't want to see Sam's sad pitying eyes, or her parent's angry glares as they're reminded their daughter is a freak of nature.

She's drawing a picture for Sam - Sam always brings her something back from the moon-runs, and she wants to have something to give to Sam for a change - when she hears the growling from behind her.

It's her father.

Tara's never been scared of her father before, but something about the way he's looking at her makes her slip off her desk chair and back away.

"Dad," she calls out. "Why aren't you outside?"

The wolf takes another step forward, Tara takes another step back. In a flash the wolf leaps at her, and Tara drops to the floor, rolling onto her side. Her father's jaw snaps at her twice before attaching itself to her shoulder.

It hurts like nothing she's ever experienced before. Her chest begins to tighten as she begs him to let go, tears beginning to fall.

He takes no notice, dragging her from the room. He's so tall her feet hardly brush against the floor. It's all she can do to walk in tandem to reduce the pain.

He drags her through the house, out into the garden and through the gate at the back of the fence, left open for the full moon. He takes her deep into the woods behind their home and throws her to the ground in a moonlit clearing. He lunges and she scrambles further away, into the centre.

At the other side she can see her mother and sister. Sam tries to move forward but her mother nudges her back with a growl. Sam lets out a confused whine.

While she's distracted, her father leaps forward and clamps his jaw around her leg. Tara thinks she hears a crunch, but she can't hear much over the sound of her own scream. The next thing she knows, a paw is swooping down at her face, and she barely manages to raise her arms to protect it. She feels hot breath against her neck, and then it's gone.

Tara struggles to breathe through the pain. Her hands become slippery with blood as she curls up. It drips into her eyes as she tries to peer through her blurry vision to figure out what's going on. She wonders if they left her here to die.

As she breathes deep, her hearing comes back to her, and she learns she's not alone after all. She can hear growling and barking, a yelp. There's the sound of fighting in the distance.

Tara wants to move, to get up, but the pain is too great. All she can do is lie there crying, curled up and shivering in the cold.

Eventually, the noises stop with a howl, and a nose brushes against her neck. She can't help the whimper that escapes her. The wolf responds with a whine of their own, tongue darting out to lick at her shoulder wound.

They nudge at her arms, rolling her onto her back, and when Tara peeks through her hands it's her sister's familiar amber eyes above her.

Her tears begin to fall faster, a sob escaping her lips as she reaches up to grab at Sam's neck. The wolf laps at her tears, nuzzling against her. The warmth of Sam's body on hers keeps the chill night air at bay, and she finally begins to feel safe. It leaves her exhausted.

Sam pulls her up by her teeshirt, fangs tearing through the material, and pulls her to the side. Tara finds she can't stand on her injured leg, the pain of trying unbearable. The wolf crouches down with a bark, tail wagging so Tara understands what she's telling her to do. Tara climbs onto Sam's back and wraps her arms around her neck. They used to do this all the time, until last year when her parents said Sam had to spend the moons with the pack now, that she couldn't spend all her time babysitting Tara.

Sam stands up and takes her home.

#/mp #ask box #Scream #Sam Carpenter #Tara Carpenter #AU: fangs for the support #ffts path 2a #ffts path 2b #my writing tag

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soapgraves · 3 months

Text

hanahaki connverse teehee. (Warning! Its a long one. And poorly written. Because i needed this down and done.)

Because of stevens bpd its really hard to convince himself that connie loves him 100% of the time and paired with that awful proposal its safe to safe that he probably could develop it in a spiral thinking she doesn't love him & holes himself up until she forces him to speak & he coughs all those rose petals up.

Obviously thats not how it fully happens, because he has to speak to the gems! But he doesn't stay long to chat, earning their concern. (Along with those petals around.)

Following his spiral, hes definitely not talking to connie like he usually does. Quick responses, not initiating, which in turn makes connie response similarly. (Shes tired with school, now her boyfriend isn't responding to her? Or checking in? she gets a lil tired and thinks he'll get over it.) With this, steven doesn't think shes trying enough to respond. (So she doesn't love him, right? Obviously she'd fight harder if she did. And she's not! Why doesn't she love him anymore?) That leads to steven not talking to anyone at all.

That Segways into greg trying to talk to steven (the gems are trying to figure it out, and steven won't talk to them!) So he goes to try and help with some fatherly advice, steven lays in bed coughing but not responding a ton, hes under the covers away from gregs sight. Once he flips those covers though- petals, full roses, everywhere. Ans his son freaks out, triggers a coughing fit of more- freaking greg out, and he doesn't know whats wrong- steven doesn't know whats wrong- thats when the gems finally try to help.

Obviously the gems dont know whats wrong (p: "gems dont cough out flowers- do they? It cant be a gem thing!") So they take him to Priyanka, who doesn't get it either.

Finally, thats when connie is called to step in. (Her boyfriend hasnt called her in weeks, has barely texted her- he hasn't even mailed her anything!) Now shes worried. Especially after lion arrived with just petals in his fur- more worrying!

When she shows up, steven goes into a panic attack- full coughing attack and those thorns and vines hurt. He doesn't know whats wrong- its worse when connies there. And when did looking at connie hurt? (Once they finally meet each others eyes, his full of tears, hers full of concern- it clicks.)

Connie understands whats wrong, what may be causing it- and apologizes perfusely. Its not really her fault, but she feels bad because she didn't do enough to check in. She validates his feelings, tells him its okay- shes there, and she still loves him. (Something in his eyes gave it away- it had to. He wasn't speaking, he wasn't coughing anymore, just crying, how did she know?)

The vines stopped scratching, the roses stopped growing, the petals finally out of his system with his last coughs. Was that it? A love confession? Was that all he needed? Reassurance, and love, and reality.

They're fine by the end, he's definitely going to have biweekly therapy appointments though-

#steven universe #steven universe future #su #suf #connverse angst #connverse #connverse hurt comfort #connie maheswaran #su hanahaki #hanahaki #hanahaki disease #suf hanahaki #Steven universe au #steven universe has bpd #bpd steven universe #hurt comfort #angst #steven angst #steven hurt comfort

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dairy-farmer · 11 months

Note

I've seen it done exactly once in an ABO fic but it was GRIPPING and I think you'd love it? And this is just my take on the themes/troupes cause "Nice~👍🎉💖"? Vaguely Gothic Horror but Modern Bats! Mixed with a Civilian Tim Au! Where Tim doesn't know Bruce is batman. Oh sure he knows the Brucie Mask is fake as hell, has since he was super tiny, but NOT what he's hiding! What ANY of them are.

And the Bats are urban legends, the wealthy scoff, you don't REALLY believe there is some sort of Bat Creature running around Gotham? (Wayne tech makes the finest video scrambling tech not on the market. It will never BE on the market.) Tim of course knows there IS, but really... since his parents died? He's more concerned with keeping Drake Industries afloat. People don't have a lot of confidence in young teenage CEOs. Or even barely legal CEOs.

He's been swamped. Yet Brucie "I basicly OWN half of Gotham yet everyone thinks I'm a harmless himbo" Wayne has been religiously sending him invites to every event he hosts. As though Tim wouldn't have been eaten ALIVE and had Drake Industries stolen from him, before now. But he can't put it off any more. He's run out of fires to put out, as it were.

People are starting to ask when they'll see him at the next event. If he's, for some unthinkable reason, AVOIDING dear Brucie Wayne. The beloved brainless prince of Gotham. Both PR and HR would strangle him to death with his own insides if he said he was.

So he goes. Puts on his best GNC suit, those touches of jewelry, a bit of scent you can't tell if it's perfume or cologne etc. And he goes to be the little Dragon of Gotham. Tries to avoid getting to close to the looming, masked by only their own faces, CLEARLY hiding something Wayne's.

He fails.

Of course he does. Bruce gets him alone. Knows that Tim knows his Brucie Mask is fake. Knows a LOT more then he should, actually. Has been trying to get a hold of him since his parents accident. To foster him of course. (And in the beginning that really WAS all Bruce wanted to do. But Tim was so, so clever. Kept escaping and proving himself and fighting. Bruce was watching, ready to step in and take over. Them moment never came though. But Bruce has grown so... attached. He WANTS to take care of his boy. This brilliant soft young man, untouched by the vigilante life.)

Tim mentally calls bullshit. There is HUNGER in those eyes. And? Just as Bruce is pulling the "you know... Wayne Industries has been VERY interested in some of your company's current projects, we should sex about it." Purr and loom routine? They get interrupted by the one and only Gotham's Golden Pretty Boy: Dickie Grayson. And oh shit! Same too toothy fake smile, same hunger in the eyes, weird tension between him and Bruce. Tim takes his chance to escape.

But for SOME reason? After that party? He CANT seem to escape! (It's cause they're Bats. Professional Ninja Stalkers.) Showing up everywhere, knowing too much, circling tighter and tighter like sharks he's not entirely sure he even WANTS to fight. No one has ever been this into him. There are enough red flags to bury men alive.

He might be into that.

And they DO watch him everywhere! Both mundane life, work, and getting off when he should be in what is the privacy of his own home. They fantasize about it, about him. There are GIFTS.

Then? Oh dear, one rainy, rainy night... as he needs to fetch something from the old Manor he grew up in... which is RIGHT next to Wayne Manor? For some UNKNOWN reason his car blows a tire as it passes near their gate! Well he can't drive like THAT! And it is so VERY late! Guess he has no choice but to stay the night now.

And if the sneak a bit of pollen into his food? Well they FINALLY have their Tim HOME. Where he belongs! He'd love being part of the family, being loved, taken care off, not ALONE anymore. But they have such a limited amount of time to convince him. To open him up to the idea that being around them feels good. That they'll take care off him. The second the rain stops, he'll flee again back to lonely penthouse and isolated life. They HAVE too!

So they make him feel good. Brain meltingly good. Mouths and fingers and toys and more. They have his phone and work computer, it'll be easy to impersonate him for a while and shoulder some of that work for their boy while they convince him. They have NO idea how he got dosed they lie, but they care so much, love their Tim so much they'll GLADLY help him through it. Won't tell a soul, promise! They got you little bird, they got you~♡

i might have a fic rec for this!!!! it's incomplete but a very good civilian tim and bats/tim fic!!!!!!!!!!!!

its called the rapture, it's a hunger

the idea of the bats alll having this kind of possessiveness over tim and doing their best to integrate into his life like he's not desperately suspicious of them and their ulterior motives is so good!!!! tim may not be robin or a bat but he can still pick up and sense that things aren't fully pure and innocent from these waynes that act VERY suspicious towards him in particular. but tim is trapped because its him against basically a miniature army who all have an obsessive streak 😭

#anonymous #asks #answered asks

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msallurea · 3 months

Text

The Blessing of No Longer Relasping

TW: very vulnerable, includes discussion of dr*gs, su1c1de, s3lf h4rm, etc

Today I woke up and everything was going fine until my morning was ruined because I couldn't find my key on my purse which is where I always put it. This pissed me completely off for 3 main reasons:

1. I hate hearing my mom fuss and give me the irresponsibility speech

2. I ALWAYS am 99.9% aware of where my things are and if not then it's placed in the last place I know I put it at which I didn't see it at

3. My siblings are the reason I know my key wasn't there

How my set my personal belongings I try putting it in a way where it can't be touched, unfourtanetly my siblings always find a way to ruin that which is why I've been dying for my own fucking room. This weekend they had continuously kept dropping mythings and at some point I got tired of it and told them they need to pick up my things themselves, this alone pissed me off even more because when I checked my things stuff was still on the floor that was for me. As I was trying to find my key this morning mind you I have to be at school at a certain time as well I couldn't even find it and when I asked my siblings to help me because I know in my gut they're the reason why it wasn't there, for one they were barely looking and secondly they sat up there looking in the places I knew it wasn't at..(my little sister for example sees me looking in my purse and sits up there walk towards me trying to look in my purse to see if it's there I MEAN WTF BRO😑🤬)

So now I'm sitting in class trying to figure out how I'm about to tell my mom I don't have my key without telling her and play it off. Honestly this whole thing upsets me and really sets me off causing me stress. I had came to school ans my thoughts were pretty rampant but after a long while eventually I calm down...well at least my thoughts weren't so rampant. Normally I would've tried doing something to harm myself or fill my mind up with the many MANY ways I would've wanted to either get revenge or harm myself or 0verd0se of dr*gs just to feel better especially because I'm holding back a ton of tears right now. This is sensitive and so stressful for me because I do have OCD and I'm prone to high levels of stress especially especially when I become compulsive.

This time around I didn't do anything out of character. I didn't plunge myself up in a dark place and drown myself in my own rage and impulse shoving myself down with anything harmful i could find just to feel better like I normally would've done. The worst part is with all this I was gonna blame myself for even allowing this entire situation to happen this way. I say all this to say to anyone who does have issues with relapsing and going back to there old self h4rming tendencies that it is ok...you don't have to be a slave to your darker traits. It's a blessing I didn't drown myself in my compulsive nature and self aimed harm. Just like for those who have been going strong on sobriety and are recovering from your own self h4rm tendencies I want you to know I'm so proud of you..that's something I wish I could hear in times like this where the world we live in currently quite literally anything could trigger me and people like me.

To those who are still here holding strong just know we both made it this far and we're gonna make it even farther..to those who are on their verge of end and feel they are ready to clock out and unsubcribe from what feels like hell right now...I cant control your choices and decisions but if you have any little feeling left at all in you please understand that you don't have to be a slave to yourself anymore. I know you wanna let it all go and not deal with any of these things anymore, but know there is always a choice even when you can't see them. You always have a choice to finally take control even if it seems like you can't. Take it from me when I say that it is out of our control to see how others will do us and the circumstances we go through but it is in our control how we handle them and how we choose to let them affect us. To those who feel like no one ever listens know that you're always being heard..from someone much higher than any of us, who you believe that to be is your choice. There's a reason you're still here even if you can't see it yet or even understand, you're not gonna understand now but you will one day which makes this all the more valuable.

You are loved, you are safe, you're protected, you ARE enough and always will be..

#msallurea #self love #self growth

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pokemon-ash-aus · 2 years

Note

I wanna read the mimikyu part!

Okay :)

He didn't even think when he raced over to grab the Jangmo-o's. He saw the building collapse and he saw the baby's trying their hardest to run. They were so young. Too young to die.

So Ash shouldered his pride, dropped everything he deemed important, his backpack, his pokeballs, his z-Ring, and he raced over.

He slid above them, curving his back and body shielding the dragons, ignoring the screeches of surprise and the angry and frightened nips he received.

He doesn't have time to push any out when he feels the harsh slam against his back, arms and legs buckling under the weight of the rock. He cant feel his left leg, but he can't feel it all too much and instead focuses on pushing the dragons away from the crush zone.

"You're gonna be okay," He whispers to the frightened creatures. "But I need you to run outside, it's safer out there."

It doesn't take much to coax, and soon they're all running away from him. There's another thud, and he can feel his arms buckle under the added weight on his back, hissing as his left leg burns in agony.

He can't rise anymore, he's trying but he can't seem to put enough strength into lifting the rock off.

Pikachu races over, his partner and friend screaming.

Ash realizes he can barely hear his babble, he can't seem to focus enough to listen to everything his partner is yelling.

It doesn't matter because now Piakchu is gripping his shirt with his teeth and with his paws, trying to help him out.

But it's useless isn't it?

He feels the weight of the rock on his back become near unbearable and he's struggling to hold it up at all. He's breathing heavily and he's panicking but now's not really the time for ridiculous emotions.

Ash glances around, a bit desperate, there's nothing he can do to shoulder the weight, everything is either too small or already breaking. He has to lay down before he breaks something else.

But pikachu is still too close, and he wont move if Ash tells him too cause Piakchu is dumb like that and doesnt like to listen to him when it involves his health.

So Ash places a hand on his chest, closing his eyes and shoving. It's hard at first, until Ash feels the eventual rip of his shorts and Pikachu's fur disappears from his grasp.

He looks up and Piakchu is sprawled a bit aways in shock, but he's just as fast to jump up, spitting out the clothes in his mouth and running right back over.

Ash grimaces, and lays down, hissing as a rock lands on the two on him and bounces off instantly. It's starting to hurt, and he can feel the rocks slowly crushing him beneath their combined weight.

Pikachu is screaming at him, hitting the rock and using iron tail on the edges.

He probably knows that one wrong move and he could break the rocks but it wouldn't end clean.

"I'm sorry, Pikachu." It hurts so much to breathe, he can almost feel his ribs cracking. "I'll be fine just get help."

And Piakchu is smart, he rushes over to his pokeballs and releases Rowlet, the small bird pokemon is assaulted by yelling but he gets the message and races off.

Then Pikachu releases Lycanroc and Torracat, and now the trio are trying to lift the rest of the rock up.

They don't move much, too scared to use any moves and too weak physically to lift without hands.

The once they do manage to move ends up with a gross squelch on his leg. He can't feel it but by their horrified looks it looks bad.

"Don't!" He yells when they back away. "I can't feel it, it's okay!"

It doesn't ease them in the slightest, but they can't do much of anything except wait with him.

His vision starts to darken, blurring out at random times. His breathing is shallow, but he's doing a semi-decent job at masking it.

He feels guilty, torracat is sobbing, pressing her head against his face and purring. But there's nothing he can do to reassure her.

Finally two hours in he hears footsteps, heavy footsteps and yelling but he cant hear that.

His pokemon do tho, as their yelling and screaming and they all look a touch bit hysterical.

Kiawe rounds the corner, and Ash weakly smiles and waves. The fire type trainer takes a step back, almost horrified. He tears his eyes away and yells, and Ash can hear the hysterical tone despite not hearing much of anything.

He wonders how he looks to him.

People are rounding the corner, far more than he could count at the moment, but he hears pokemon being released and can feel the thunder steps of people running closer.

He closes his eyes for a second and jolts them back open when he feels a hand on his face. It's Professor Kukui and he's screaming, sobbing and just trying to make sure Ash stays awake.

But Ash can't understand.

"I don't know what you're saying professor." Ash tries to chuckle but the weight is still crushing him and he has to wheeze to regain his breath.

Kukui looks away, and yells something and now Ash feels like he can breathe again as the literal weight on his shoulders lighten considerably. There's yells of horror, and now Kukui is gently turning him on his side but that's painful and he has to bite back a scream he's too afraid to take.

And now that Ash can see his body he realizes his left leg is a bloody mess, mangled and broken beyond belief. Not that it mattered, he couldn't feel it anyway. His chest is bloody, and Ash thinks a rock stabbed him. But it turns out one of his ribs shifted out of place, but he's in so much pain he can feel it.

And Kukui is holding down on his stomach, his hand quickly turning red from his own blood as something wraps his leg tightly. He can see his pokemon by his side, and he can hear the distant sounds of sirens.

His friends walk into view and he's too weak to reassure them that he'll be fine. He'll always be fine.

He blinked back tears and realized.

He's not too weak to say it.

Saying it would be lying.

He looks up at the ceiling, knowing he's going to truly die this time and there was probably little chance to survive this.

He can't feel scared, he doesn't feel the least bit of fear that he used to imagine.

Maybe dying so many times numbed him to the pain.

Maybe this time, he was surrounded by friends and family that made dying less scary.

So he smiles, eyes half lidded and blinking back tears.

"I had a good run, didn't I- '' He doesn't bother stopping for everyone denying anything. "Lived my life to the fullest even if i never got to complete what i wanted to do..."

Kukui's hands are on his face, probably to deny that he's dying, but Ash knows all too well he's lying to himself. He feels guilty for leaving this way, but it's peaceful.

"Thank you all for sticking by my side." He smiles. "Please take care of yourselves, and my pokemon and i'll rest easily knowing i can watch over you everyday."

There's screaming, but he can't seem to care much anymore. His body is shutting down and Ash knows his final moments are here.

"May my aura be with you." he breathes out, finally closing his eyes one last time.

He's gone by the time everyone is screaming at him to wake up.

#Mimikyu au #mimkyu au #Ash ketchum #mentions death #tw death #cause of death #Wip #Fanfic

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