#i have many reasons why i want/need to fucking cancel it

[depressedzelda]

uargh and so on and so forth

#im sorry but my life is so fucking stupid. the triviality of the cruel dumbass shit im constantly having to deal with is so fucking stupid #like i am the trueman show exceot nobody even watches and my show got cancelled but they didnt tell me lol #whyyy am i 'difficult' for being the only fucking person in my family that caresss about covid LOL #why am i the onky one that was literally ostracized and bullied nonstop during the time i needed and WANTED my family the most #and they hsd SOOOOOOOOO MUCH TIME AND SO MANY OPPORTUNITIES TO STEP IN AND HELP #AND IT WOULDVE BEEN E A S Y!!!!! EASYYYYY ALL I NEEDED WAS 1 PERSON TO C A R E #but no instead they straight up bullied me past the point of suicidal intention Even after i picked myself up again #like they dont understand it is literally all their fault lol i spent the first 20 years if my life apologizing and doing anything they #asked or wanted i was the perfecttt kid lmfaoooo but fuuuuuck me right #and now i have to be the responsible one and theyre all the fucking children making everything so fucking hard FOR WHAT #like you really wonder why i didnt want you in my life anymore??? ID BE BETTER OFF!!!!!! THIS HAS BEEN PROVEN!!!! #i swear to god. when omi does die...i have no reason to interact or speak to them anymore #if they want to blame me for that fine. they can do that. FAR away from me.

[inkskinned]

she's three years younger than i am, and i put on cascada as a throwback, cackling - before your time! i've been borrowing my brother's car, and it's older than dirt, so the trunk is like, maybe permanently locked. when the sun comes through the window to frame her cheekbones, i feel like i'm 16 again. i shake when i'm kissing her, worried i won't get it right.

in 2003, my state made gay marriage legal. where she grew up, it wasn't legal until 11 years later - 10 years ago. if legal protections for gay marriage were a person, that person would be entering 5th grade. online, a white gay man calls the fight for legal marriage boring, which isn't kind of him but it is a common enough opinion.

it has only been 9 years since gay marriage was nationally official. it is already boring to have gay people in your tv. it is already boring to mention being gay - "why make it your entire personality?" i know siblings that have a larger age gap than the amount of time it's been legally protected. i recently saw a grown man record himself crying about how evil gay people are. he was begging us, red in the face - just do better.

i am absolutely ruined any time my girlfriend talks about being 27 (i know!! a child!), but we actually attended undergrad at the same time since i had taken off time to work between high school and college. while walking through the city, we drop our hands, try not to look too often at each other. the other day i went to an open mic in a basement. the headlining comedian said being lesbian isn't interesting, but i am a lesbian, if you care. as a joke, she had any lesbian raise their hand if present. i raised mine, weirdly embarrassed at being the single hand in a sea of other faces. she had everyone give me a round of applause. i felt something between pride and also throwing up.

sometimes one thing is also another thing. i keep thinking about my uncle. he died in the hospital without his husband of 35 years - they were not legally wed, so his husband could not enter. this sounds like it should be from 1950. it happened in 2007. harassment and abuse and financial hardship still follow any person who is trying to get married while disabled. marriage equality isn't really equal yet.

and i don't know that i can ever put a name to what i'm experiencing. sometimes it just feels... so odd to watch the balance. people are fundamentally uninterested in your identity, but also - like, there's a whole fucking bastion of rabid men and women who want to kill you. your friends roll their eyes you're gay we get it and that is funny but like. when you asked your father do you still love me? he just said go to your room. you haven't told your grandmother. disney is on their 390th "first" gay representation, but also cancelled owl house and censored the fuck out of gravity falls. you actively got bullied for being gay, but your advisor told you to find a different gimmick for your college essay - everyone says they're gay these days.

once while you were having a hard day you cried about the fact that the reason our story is so fucking boring to so many people is that it is so similar. that it is rare for one of us to just, like, have a good experience across the board. that our stories often have very parallel bends - the dehumanization, the trauma, the trouble with trusting again. these become rote instead of disgusting. how bad could it be if it is happening to so many people?

i kiss my girlfriend when nobody is looking. i like her jawline and how her hands splay when she's making a joke. there is nothing new about this story, sappho. i love her like opening up the sun. like folding peace between the layers of my life, a buttercream of euphoria, freckles and laughter and wonder.

my dad knows about her. i've been out to him since i was 18 - roughly four years before the supreme court would protect us. the other day he flipped down the sun visor while driving me to the eye doctor. "you need to accept that your body was made for a husband. you want to be a mother because you were made for men, not women." he wants me to date my old high school boyfriend. i gagged about it, and he shook his head. he said - "don't be so dramatic. you can get used to anything."

the other day a straight friend of mine snorted down her nose about it, accidentally echoing him - she said there are bigger problems in this world than planning a wedding.

#splled ink #writeblr #it's really hard to describe what im feeling

[tojiwrd]

thinking about shitty bf toji and ...

► toji would be so sweet at the beginning — not like, bringing you flowers every date n shit no. this man lives for the little ways to show u that he loves you i.e stopping in his tracks when you abruptly reach down to tie your laces in public when they untie, noticing how your face wash is running out, so he buys a new one when he goes to the store and the night after you run out and make a note to get a new one, you wake up n see that a brand new one is sitting next to the sink.

► but i also feel like toji is so ... difficult sometimes bc while he doesn't give you grand displays of affection and rarely ever tells you that he loves you, you know he does. but sometimes you need him to say it, and you need him to not untangle your intertwined fingers when you're walking together because he doesn't like showing affection in public.

► that would be a-okay if he did it in private, but he doesn't. two years or so into the relationship, you begin realizing that toji isn't truly yours to love because his heart lies in the cold hands of his ex-wife. he doesn't talk about her with you, but the times he did, he always claimed he was completely over her, that she's dead and nothing can be done.

► it should've been enough because he let you into his home and let you be a part of his bigger picture. he let you take care of megumi and play mother to him, but when toji hears sweet little megumi call you 'mom,' toji flips.

"toji, please," you said, trying to reason with him though it seemed all your attempts proved to be futile because he seemed as though he was wearing noise-cancellation headphones the way he barely looked at you while seething in anger.

he shook his head as if he was processing every single thought that crept into his mind. "how long have you been letting 'gumi call you that?" you moved your mouth to respond, but he cut you off. "don't fucking lie."

"this was the first time, i swear." truth. "toji, he's a kid."

"i know," he said, exasperation coating his voice. "i fucking know, y/n, that's why i don't need you making him think you are his mother."

you shouldn't have been surprised because yes, you weren't megumi's mother. but you were surprised because you went to megumi's school events and drove him to his friends' houses, you joined the parents' friend group and raised money for school fundraisers because toji asked you to, and you ironed megumi's clothes and made sure to place him on his chair every night so he wouldn't have to worry about his uniform before school.

"no matter how many times you cook for megumi or play mother at his conferences, you aren't. stop giving him the wrong impression."

"i know." you couldn't say anything else.

"you aren't his mother." he struck a blow. "you aren't even my wife." the tears began building up behind your closed eyes, but he continued. "i don't want you to be my wife. you're not a part of this family the way you think you are."

#HAHAHA i lov shitty toji #like this man fr makes me cry he's so feral #toji fushiguro #toji x reader #toji angst #toji x you #jjk toji #jujustu kaisen #jjk angst #toji fushiguro angst

[niefics]

“JUST FRIENDS” — P.SH X FEM!Y/N

Sypnosis : Y/n L/n struggles to keep her friendship with her closest friend Sunghoon normal, however they struggle horribly, fighting their urges for him in more ways then one. PART ONE !

Warnings : not proofread, car sex, making out, cursing

Word count : 1052, idk if I fw it fr but wtv

— His soft lips touched mines as we softly kissed in the tight space of his car. My phone vibrates as I break the kiss to check to see what it was. “Shit, my friends are wondering were I went.” I spoke grabbing my things rushing to put my jacket on and fixing my hair. He watched as I rushed to gather myself. Especially after the make out session we just had.

The party I was at was getting very boring anyways, my friends enjoying it more then I was. The smell of weed making my head hurt slightly as I hung around my friend until I noticed sunghoon, across the party staring at me, telling me to meet him at his car.

I felt my chin get pulled closer to sunghoon, his lips touching mines again, whipping my slightly swollen lips after. “Text me whenever you get ready to leave, we can finish what we-“ “I don’t know Hoon, my friends are planning to go to another party soon, so we might have to finish this another time.” I spoke as I got out of the car shutting the door and walking back into the party to see my friends.

“Y/n, we’ve been looking for you, for 20 minutes !” One friend spoke worriedly. I tried my best not to worry them and not inform them that it was my close friend sunghoon I was with, making out in his car as I ignored their first few texts until I realized it’s been 20 minutes. “Guys im fine don’t worry I was just tour for some fresh air that’s all.” I lied sheepishly. “Don’t do it again before telling us, we thought you got kidnapped or something!” Another spoke.

Sunghoon sighed in his car after watching me leave so quick and suddenly. It’s been almost 3 months since the night I helped him out with his aching boner. After sleeping together for a second time after ditching a party, it was his idea to become friends with benefits. His feelings for me are bigger then what he thought they were. Normally if had a “quick fuck” he wouldn’t be this upset if it got cancelled so suddenly.. but he was and he couldn’t understand why.

Maybe it because of all the time hes recently spent kissing, and being intimate with me. Either way he was so upset the quick session ended so soon.

“Should we go to the next party now ? There’s so many cute boys there, and jakes there y/n! Maybe you might get lucky ?” My friend spoke, Jake was a simple crush I had, until I realized how much of a flirt he was. He knew I liked him but never said anything thankfully, the only reason I know now is because of of sunghoon, who was know where to be found inside the party. Maybe he just was ready to go home early after a night of partying, something I wish I could do simply because I just didn’t want to go to a party near Jake and his fuck boy antics.

Sunghoon sat in his car staring at message he was gonna send to me. “Text me when you get ready to leave the second one ?” He shook his head, starting to delete it until he saw 3 dots pop up from me.. and just as soon as it popped up it disappeared. Maybe that night he asked for my help was a simple mistake. His horny thoughts were getting to him that night, maybe I was truly using him for just sex like expected, whatever it is he wanted more of me then ever. “I really need you right now.” He quickly texted, hoping that I could make a good excuse to ditch my friends for the rest of the night.

Believe it or not, I wanted him just as much as he wanted me right now, but there was no way I was gonna be able to even leave for the rest of the night.

“Ahh, the weed smell is making my head hurt, you guys mind if I walk outside for while ?” I spoke. “I do have to agree it is strong in here, but answer our texts and calls!” One of my friends spoke, I nodded quickly walking off to see sunghoons car telling him I’m on my way.

Getting into his car, I see a shit eating grin growing on his face. I smile too getting in quickly. “We have to make it quick!” I spoke. Both of us being pulled to the backseat quickly to have more space.

— my dress was around my waist bunched up, as I sat on his lap riding him with a fast yet slow pace from time to time. Squelching noises, noises of the leather of his car and my quiet whines were the only thing heard besides the sudden passing of a nearby car. The fear of being seen long gone.

We kissed sloppily as he thrusting into me, my hands wrapped around his neck. A constant vibration was suddenly heard, my head shoots up looking for the noise of my phone, sitting near on the back seat. “Shit.. it’s my friend.” I spoke, trying to pull myself together. “I have to answer.” A breathless moan leaving me as he kept the same pace. “Fuck- I’m close .. ju-st, just answer it, I’ll slow down.” He spoke, slowing down as I answered.

“Hello ..?” I spoke, trying to keep my moans under control. “Y/n where are you? We’re a getting ready to.” I felt as sunghoon slammed into me from under. Making my knot that was tightening quickly. I gasped muffling my mouth with my hand looking into his eyes as I struggle to swallow down the pornographic moans. He gulped, struggling to hide his moans and groans, his hands bruising my ass indefinitely. “Are you okay ?? You seem like you’re out of breath.” “No! I’m .. I-m fine.” I rushed out, clenching around sunghoon the more I stayed on the phone call.

I patted his chest trying to get him to slow down, fearing to get caught. Sunghoons fear of getting caught long gone, “fuck, y/n-“ my eyes grew big surprised by his sudden words knowing they heard.

“Wait, are you with sunghoon?”

#enhypen smut #sunghoon x y/n #sunghoon x reader #sunghoon hard hours #park sunghoon hard hours #park sunghoon smut #sunghoon smut #kpop smut

[gacha-incels]

after over a month it’s easy for some to forget the extreme misogyny that is at the heart of the PM/Limbus Company wrongful termination. I’ve seen people refer to it as a vague legal battle, twitter users overreacting, just protesters that “hate project moon” or simply that Vellmori “was fired”. This entire situation happened because Korean men on DCinside thought putting a run of the mill fashion choker on Sinclair and having Ishmael in a skin-tight diving suit meant there was a feminist working for Project Moon. In a logic jump that would make even Alex Jones blush, they said Sinclair’s choker obviously meant the artist sees men as slaves. Frequently in South Korea men like this often go on “feminist hunts” where they will try and get women fired and ruin their lives for expressing even the most basic support for women’s rights. When they found out a male artist drew the Sinclair and Ishmael IDs, they specifically stopped going after him because he is male. Instead, they found out there was a female artist working for Limbus Company, Vellmori, and subsequently tried to ruin her. In their digging they found deleted tweets of hers which, again, showed support for basic women’s rights and condemned sex trafficking and molka. Then, in an act of q-anon tier paranoia, these men went through the Limbus Company CGs and found what they thought was hands drawn specifically to do the 🤏 emoji(korean incels go through their own personal 9/11 every time they see this image. I think they tried to cancel Starbucks over it once? ironically, I saw the latest summer male costume in FGO has the character always posing with pinched fingers. I guess the incels can let this one slide because that gacha is overflowing with scantily clad women who want to fuck you and a very concerning number of little girls in microbikinis?). They wanted Vellmori fired because of these years-old deleted tweets and illustrations of hands. They did this because they hate women. Vellmori was targeted because she is a woman. These men are misogynists who are part of a hate group.

Now, instead of telling these guys to stop bothering PM employees or the law will become involved (something they have literally done when their restaurant’s staff was getting harassed), Project Moon’s CEO quickly wrote a post acquiescing to these men’s complaints including the “ideological” posts by Vellmori, who he said was let go because of this. The reason why so many female fans have dropped the game and deleted entire accounts of fanart is because we saw Vellmori get fired immediately after the misogynistic witch hunt against her. She was fired for saying abortion should be legal, she was fired for condemning the rampant hidden cameras put in women’s public toilets and changing rooms, she was fired for condemning the Nth room case. In accordance to her contract, these years old tweets had even been deleted. She was fired because delusional men thought they saw pinched fingers in her art and wanted her to suffer for it.

If you are on the fence about the boycott spearheaded by Korean fans, you need to ask yourself if accepting this rampant misogyny is worth playing a glorified casino game over. No matter how “generous” you see Limbus Company, it’s a gacha game like any other. If they wanted a “live service” game, they would have made one. If they wanted to simply tell a story, there wouldn’t be a .png casino tab with an option to pay up to $70 multiple times to gamble with, nor incentives to log in daily. They made a gacha game because this style of game makes the most money.

#limbus company #project moon

[therealcocoshady]

RED CARPET APPEARANCE 🎥

Eminem x Young Actress Reader

This is Part 2 of Daddy's Spaghetti 🥰

Synopsis : You argue with Em about a red carpet appearance at the Oscars.

The last thing you wanted was to argue with your boyfriend right before going to the Oscars, but there you were. Lately, the two of you had been arguing quite a bit. To be fair, both of you were working a lot and being in a long distance relationship didn’t help. Not only did you have to manage hectic schedules, you also had to deal with time difference and last minute changes in plans. You had been dating Marshall for a few months now and you weren’t too sure how long things would last. Sure, when you were together, things were great, but actually getting together seemed impossible, these days. Right when you thought you could both make time, there was always something coming up, like an unplanned studio session, a meeting, or God knows what else. It didn’t help either that Marshall was paranoid about the two of you being seen together. 

After more than a decade in the spotlight and living in Los Angeles, you were used to paparazzi and having your picture taken whenever you were running errands. Of course, sometimes, it was annoying, but you had learned to live with it. Marshall, on the other hand, in spite of having a career lasting over twenty-five years was as paranoid as one could get. It was one of the many reasons why he hated being in Los Angeles and always tried to get you to come to Detroit instead, along with the weather being too hot. In truth, you didn’t mind going to Michigan or spending a lot of time inside, just the two of you. This time, however, you wished he would be the one making an effort. You were nominated for an Oscar for the first time and it was a big night for you. You knew he wasn’t a big fan of public appearances but you wished he would agree to coming with you. After all, he was a nominee himself - for the same movie as you, mind you - and everyone pretty much knew about your relationship, even though none of you had officially confirmed it. To you, there was no reason not to walk the red carpet together. However, when you asked him if he would be your date to the Academy Awards, he wasn’t too enthusiast. In fact, all you got from him was a « erm, I don’t know. We’ll see. Let me think about it. ». And after giving it some thought, he decided not to go with you, breaking it to you over FaceTime, three days before the event. He brought up a bunch of reasons, like having a studio session with Dre that might run late and prevent him from making it in time, hating the red carpet anyway and not wanting to be paraded in a suit that made him look like a penguin. He did not seem to care that you having to take someone else as your date would mean you wouldn’t be sitting next to each other or that you would have wanted him to be by your side. You were mad. You had always known he didn’t really care about awards and public appearances, but you wished he would make an effort for you. Him being set in his ways made you feel like he wouldn’t put you first, just for once. 

Do you even want to be with me ? You blurted out after he told you to find another date. 

What the fuck ? He asked with disbelief all over his face. What does that have to do with that damn red carpet, Y/N ? 

You cancelled the last time you were supposed to come to LA, you’re never available and now you won’t even make an effort for me, you explained. If you don’t want to be with me anymore, just say so… 

You’re so dramatic, they better give you that Oscar, he groaned. Not everything is about you, you know ? I’m working my ass off to get the album done in time, I don’t need you complaining over a stupid red carpet appearance. 

Oh I’m being dramatic ? You asked as you stared at his face on the screen. I’ll give you drama : you can book a hotel room and forget about all the nasty things you were planning on doing to me in bed for next time we were supposed to see each other. 

Whatever, he said as he rolled his eyes. Just go and rehearse your acceptance speech. I have to go anyway. I have Dre calling on the other line. I’ll call you later. 

He did try to call you a couple of hours later, but you didn’t feel like picking up. You were still pissed off and, frankly, a little stressed out too. After all, he hadn’t answered your question about wanting to be with you. You knew you’d have to talk to him at some point - and get to the bottom of the situation, but you also didn’t want to break up over the phone merely three days before one of the most important events of your life. Whatever it was, it could wait until after the Oscars. 

You ended up walking the red carpet with your older brother as your date. The two of you were extremely close and he had always been your plus one to events. It sort of made sense to go to the Oscars with him, even though you would have loved to have Marshall by your side. Your big brother was all smiles as he watched you pose for the photographers in a stunning custom Alaïa dress. However, your attire or possible Best Actress win wasn’t exactly the main focus of the journalists, who were yelling questions about your boyfriend who was nowhere to be found. 

Where is Eminem, Y/N ? One asked. Is he coming tonight ? 

Are the two of you together ? Another yelled. 

You didn’t answer the questions about him, only the ones about your nomination, how you’d feel about winning, the movie and your outfit. You tried to focus on the positives and everything this night meant for your career, but you had a hard time focusing. All you wanted was Marshall’s hand in yours and him to be by your side. Hell, you had even picked the dress color because you thought he would like it. You knew that blue was his favorite color and had figured that, if the two of you were to walk the red carpet together, it would make his eyes pop. 

Breathe, your brother said. You look tense. Is this about Em ? 

Just call him by his name, you said as you rolled his eyes. You’ve met him. 

Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to be your date and enjoy the open bar, he continued, but you look… upset ? 

I think he wants to break up with me, you said nervously. 

No he doesn’t, your brother scoffed. Where did you get that from ? 

Well, he’s never available, he didn’t want to be here with me tonight, and he called me dramatic, and… 

First of all, you are dramatic, your brother chuckled. Also, you know he’s working a lot… 

I should have known better than to ask his biggest fan for support, you said as you rolled your eyes. 

Just shut up and focus on your big night, sis, he said with a smile. My baby sister might be getting the biggest award there is for being dramatic, tonight. Now, I think we should focus on that, as well as the fact that stylists managed to make you look presentable. 

Your brother’s weird encouragement was a good way to make you smile, and the glasses of champagne waiters kept on handing you did a great job when it came to taking the edge off. You were taken to your seats and the ceremony began. You kept nervously searching for Marshall in the crowd but you didn’t manage to spot him. Was he skipping the whole thing ? Your mind wandered as the ceremony unfolded and you were soon on autopilot. It was your first time attending the Academy Awards and this had to be the longest ceremony ever. The only entertaining things were the various performances. Your heart skipped a beat when you heard the music of Marshall’s song - the one he had written for the movie. He was not supposed to perform tonight - this had not been announced - but he was on stage, rapping the song that got him his second Oscars nomination exactly twenty years after winning Best Original Song for Lose Yourself. The crowd was wild and you were excited as well. Seeing him on stage made you forget how mad at him you were and you were back to being his number one fan, gushing over how good he looked and rapping the lyrics at the same time, like the groupie you very much were. His performance got him a standing ovation and, twenty minutes and a commercial break later, he was back on stage, accepting the award for Best Original Song. Only this time, he was conforming to the Academy’s dress code, looking dapper in a tux. He might hate this type of outfit, but no one could deny he looked absolutely incredible. One detail did catch your eye : the bow tie he was wearing was made of the same fabric as your dress. He was matching with you ! 

When you wouldn’t return his calls, he called me to ask who you were going to wear, your brother told you. 

He did ? You squeed. 

Yep. Not the kind of thing anyone who wants to break up with you would do, I think. I’m not supposed to tell you, but he’s got another one to match your second dress, too… 

You couldn’t help but smile. The fact that he would go out of his way to call your brother, as well as the dressmakers to have a bowtie matching your dress was absolutely adorable. You couldn’t keep your eyes off Marshall, who was giving a heartfelt speech about how great it felt to have the Academy acknowledge hip-hop and how grateful he was to have the opportunity to be on this stage, two decades after Lose Yourself won. His speech was just like him : elegant and understated. When he went back to his seat, you could see him search for you in the crowd and you waved quietly, sending him a kiss. You couldn’t wait to go and hug him. 

Can’t you behave ? Your brother chuckled. There’s cameras, Y/N. And try not to eye fuck him or drool, this time, will you ? 

I’ll try, you giggled. 

You were almost in agony the rest of the night and the two of you kept looking  and smiling at each other. As always when the two of you were in the same room, you were unable to take your eyes off him for a single second. You didn’t pay much attention to anything else that was going on, so much so that you almost missed your name being called for Best Actress. Everyone around you got up and cheered for you and you were lost. You had actually won an Oscar ?! You ? It didn’t feel right. Bit it was indeed, your name on the screen, and people kept on looking at you. Your brother had to help you get up as you came to your senses and realized that your childhood dream had come true. You made your way to the stage as tears of joy were welling in your eyes. You were almost shaking with nerves as you started your acceptance speech. You had one written and memorized but you couldn’t remember it for the life of you. You spotted Marshall in the crowd, who was smiling and looking at you with pride in his eyes, mouthing a silent « I love you ». 

I… Wow, you said nervously into the microphone. I can’t believe this is happening. I had something really heartfelt, clever and funny written but I can’t remember a single word so please bear with me. Hum… Standing here, on this stage, holding this award is a childhood dream come true. First, I want to thank my family who has always supported my passion, and I’d like to thank everyone in Hollywood that gave me a chance to act. And everyone who didn’t. In fact, I want to acknowledge every person who doubted me. And every boyfriend of mine who called me dramatic. There have been a few, and you best believe I’m creating a group chat tonight and telling them that I actually got an award for being dramatic and made it my full-time job. Um… What else ? Oh, uh, thank you to my manager, assistant, glam squad… Shout out to Alaïa for getting me into this dress tonight, and shout out to Marshall Mathers who will be taking it off me tonight. Dreams do come true, guys ! 

The crowd erupted in cheers and laughter and you could see Marshall laughing before you exited the stage. When you made it backstage, you took a moment to sit and realize what just happened. You had won an Oscar. Oh, and you had accidentally mentioned Marshall taking off your clothes. On stage. While million of people probably watched the ceremony on TV… Oops. A few people came to congratulate you, though you were quickly ushered back to your seat for the remainder of the ceremony. The movie you were in did not end up winning Best Picture, but you easily got over your disappointment. When the ceremony ended, you were swarmed by an army of people who came to congratulate you. You even got to hug Meryl Streep and tell her how she was the one who made you want to act in the first place, and this was definitely the highlight of your night. Your brother had gotten out of your sight and was enjoying the open bar, as he always did whenever he came with you to an event. When the crowd began to vacate, you had a moment to yourself. That’s when you spotted your boyfriend. 

Congratulations, he said as he pulled you into his arms. 

Congratulations to you too, you said giddily. You were amazing on stage ! 

As were you, he replied with a smile. Great speech, by the way… 

Oh my God, I am so sorry, you said. I forgot my speech, and I-I… Are you mad ? 

It’s fine, he chuckled. You’re way too adorable for me to be mad. 

Really ? You asked nervously. I know how you are about privacy… 

Really, he said reassuringly. And with you looking like this… ? I am glad everyone knows you’re spoken for. 

I think they got the idea when they saw you matching with me, you said with excitement. 

You like it ? He asked with a smile. I had to ask your brother and harass the dressmakers. They hate me. 

He told me, you said giddily. And I know you have another one to match my dress for the afterparty, too… 

If you still want me as your date, that is, he pointed out. 

I do, you giggled. But I’m going to need your help to get out of this dress and into the other… 

Let’s go, then. 

He grabbed your hand and you walked out of the theater, holding your awards, while an army of journalists were screaming to get your attention. You half-expected Marshall to let go of your hand, knowing how guarded he was when it came to the press, but he only squeezed it tighter before grabbing you by the waist as you made your way to a car. 

Em, how are you feeling tonight ? A journalist asked. 

Have you seen my date ? I’m great, man, he grinned as he looked at you lovingly. 

VIDEO : WATCH AS EMINEM GUSHES OVER Y/N AFTER THE OSCARS

Eminem & Y/N have officially confirmed their relationship ! The couple did not walk the red carpet together but they certainly made a memorable exit, as Eminem gushed over his date to journalists while not letting go of her. This happened after Y/N hinted at Em taking her Alaïa dress off her in her acceptance speech. While the Rap God did not mention his girlfriend in his own speech, he certainly appeared in love. While known for his stoic face, he was seen smiling all evening, especially when they made their way to the Vanity Fair afterparty (almost an hour late, mind you…)  in matching outfits. And if he does not seem like one to kiss and tell, no one missed Y/N’s lipstick all over his mouth, nor the hickies in his neck. 

That night was a big one for the rapper and the movie star, as they both took home statues, respectively for Best Original Song and Best Actress. And from the looks of it, they certainly celebrated. 

#eminem #marshall mathers #slim shady #eminem fanfiction #eminem x reader #eminem fluff #eminem imagine #marshall mathers x reader #marshall mathers imagine

[ittybluebell]

Roommate | Daredevil G/T | Chapter 1

AO3

Next

Matt Murdock didn't have anything against mice. He'd never been personally harrassed by one, but he understood the need to get rid of them. One easily turned into a dozen and with all the mess and digging into food, eviction was necessary. Despite how many rodents he heard daily, it wasn't something he thought about. The only reason mice were on his mind now was because one had moved into the floor, and he could hear it moving around as he laid in bed.

Now, like he said, Matt didn't have anything against mice.

Scrtch-scrtch-tick.

This one, however, was pushing its luck.

It showed up one night, moving in when he was out vigilante-ing and he only noticed the next day. At first, he didn't care. It was alone and hadn't yet realized there was food in his apartment. He had other, more pressing issues than a single mouse. It was a benign little thing - hardly a problem. Most nights, he could ignore the pitter-pattering and scraping or put in his noise-canceling earbuds.

Tonight, the mouse was too loud for earbuds. As he tossed and turned, Matt fumed, wondering what that rodent could possibly be up to. Rearranging furniture? Fuck, it sounded like it. Little mouse furniture.

Enough was enough. Matt threw a pillow at the floor and told the thing to shut up. To his surprise, it did. Matt sighed and finally went to sleep.

From that night on, he noticed a drastic decline in his downstairs neighbor's noise pollution.

How silly it was, Matt thought during a good mood, holding a grudge toward an animal. Especially one that was polite enough to let him sleep in peace.

Oh, how naïve he was.

The mouse quickly reinstated its grudge status when Matt noticed things going missing. It started with the bagels - a hole in the bag he noticed because the scent of bagel was particularly strong. Upon investigation, he discovered there was a complete lack of crumbs. And a chunk discreetly chewed from the middle. From there, things escalated. He smelled the shift in the air, smelled the remnants of another living being in his apartment. Little objects went missing - things even a seeing person might miss. But not Matt Murdock.

The sock was the last straw.

"What's the best bait for mouse traps?" Matt asked as soon as he entered the office.

"Cheese?" Foggy answered, confused. "Why? Do you have mice?"

"One. One mouse."

"How d- nevermind. Let me guess - you can't sleep."

"It's taking my stuff."

Foggy laughed. Karen huffed.

"At least tell me you're using non-lethal," said Karen. Upon his silence, she aww'd sadly. "Matt, no. It's just a mouse. You can't kill it."

"They're pests," said Foggy.

"But they're so cute. It just wants a place to live."

"Karen-" started Matt.

"No, no, she's got a point." Foggy spun his chair around. "Matt, you can't kill it! So cute and fuzzy!"

The lawyer-by-day, vigilante-by-night groaned. "Fine, I won't. Just stop looking at me like that."

"Like what?"

"Foggy, I can feel your eyes fake-tearing up."

Matt bought some glue traps and baited them with peanut butter. When Karen told him glue traps were worse - "They're so inhumane, Matt!" - he assured her that he'd know when the mouse got stuck; it wouldn't suffer. As much as the thing annoyed him, Karen was right: he wasn't going to abandon his no-killing rule for one mouse. (One mouse that must have a vendetta against him. He would not stoop to its level.) What kind of hypocrite would he be, huh?

The traps were set. Now to wait.

And wait.

A week passed. No mouse was caught. When he listened to its movement, he realized it was avoiding the spots he'd trapped. Avoiding the usual routes.

Smart. For a rodent. But Matt was smarter.

More traps, different bait. Traps disguised as the food and objects he'd noticed go missing, even the mate to his missing sock. It couldn't resist now.

Days passed.

Evidently, it could resist.

Foggy teased him about being outsmarted by an animal. Karen was on the mouse's side. Somebody must've told Jessica because he got a condescending text offering her services. Traitors, every one of them.

It all came to a head one terrible Friday night. Matt was already in a bad mood when he got home from work but going out, hearing and feeling New York City, pushed him over the edge. He was annoyed, his brain was overstimulated, and he just wanted to rest. The rooftop access door shut behind him and he threw his helmet into its trunk, about to shed the rest when the distinct sound of scratching and plastic crinkling in the kitchen cupboard caught his ear.

Matt stilled. It was here.

He marched with purpose toward the sounds.

That little bastard wasn't getting away this time. Catching it would be a satisfying end to a crappy day.

The mouse started fleeing before he was even close. It was headed for the other end of the cupboards - a hole in the floor Matt wasn't aware of but now could sense the air flowing from within. He'd have to seal that in the mor-

Mice didn't run on two legs.

Matt cocked his head, listening to the pattern of footfalls. He'd never cared to pay attention, but now it was impossible to miss. He knew what scurrying rodents sounded like. Whatever was in his kitchen, it was no rodent. It was bipedal. A bird? No, not with that speed. Not with that gait. He needed a closer examination.

Matt threw open the cupboard door. The first thing to hit his senses was the scent of corn chips.

The second was the heartbeat.

The creature's heart pounded swiftly in its chest. Air rushed from a mouth that was too upright for any kind of animal, a nose too humanlike. Small shoes hit the baseboard as it ran. Fabric rustled the same way he heard every single day in the street - like clothing.

Matt got lower, needing to be closer, needing to examine this little anomaly. How it moved, how it sounded, how uncannily familiar it was.

The living shape that his senses created was so alike to people that he was too shocked to outwardly react.

The little thing escaped into the floor, and Matt Murdock was left crouching there. Slowly, he shut the door. He took off the suit, dressed his wounds, and went to bed, his mind racing.

His body was exhausted, but he couldn't sleep. Not when he was tracking the creature's movements. Every scrape, every soft thud of a step, the whisper-

Whispering?

"You're fine. He didn't see you. There's no way…"

Whispering. Okay.

Matt pretended he didn't hear anything and put in his earbuds. That was a tomorrow-Matt problem.

Unfortunately for tomorrow-Matt, another problem knocked on his door first. That problem rhymed with Stank Hassle and didn't like to be ignored. Frank did offer coffee when they left so at least it wasn't a total bust. It was a good opportunity to get Matt out of his head; to get a clear perspective of the night before. Matt decided he was exhausted and hallucinating. The alternative was a tiny person living in the walls of his apartment. Delusion was easier.

Delusion was also what kept the borrower from abandoning the apartment altogether.

Call them stubborn, or stupid, but Finch didn't want to leave. Borrowers could only get so lucky. Landing a decent apartment with an oblivious bean was a rare opportunity, and Finch had no intention of giving it up. They would use this good fortune. Even if they didn't deserve it.

Finch shook off the guilt following that thought.

They spent the first week setting up: finding a place to sleep and tidying it up, living off the rations they packed. They got a lay of the land, surveying the apartment and its infrastructure. The excessively bright billboard directly in front of the living room window, the kitchen, and - most importantly - the bean. Light - or lack thereof - was never an issue for him. Not once did he flip a switch or so much as use his phone, which read texts aloud to him. He hardly looked at whatever claimed his attention. Everything added up to limited vision, but they couldn't be sure. It was safest not to risk any assumptions.

Evidence pointed to some damn good hearing when Finch was carving planks of wood out of the floor's innards. They were minding their own business, content with their repetitive, calming task, when something large and loud impacted the ceiling a dozen paces away.

The borrower nearly jumped out of their overalls, giving a startled squeak.

"Shut up," yelled the muffled voice above.

Pretending their soul wasn't just violently expelled from their body, Finch smoothed down their curly brown hair and exhaled shakily, making a mental note to postpone noisy work till the bean was away.

And they did good on that: when the bean was home, Finch completed the quieter, slower tasks. They thought they'd discovered the formula for living under the radar, satisfied to have found a routine that worked.

Then the traps appeared. Finch cursed their luck. The jig was up. The bean set up gross glue traps in outer access points, a couple even getting to the paths Finch took. Finch avoided them and laid low for a bit, hoping the lack of activity would convince the bean they'd skipped town. But more traps appeared. Smart ones, too - they almost fell for a couple. Now, Finch knew a thing or two about a thing or two. They made new routes and took extra care when borrowing. They even started mapping paths to the apartments below. Despite their small stature, Finch had a lot of room for determination. After a life of sticking their hand in the fire, they learned to take the heat. If the bean wanted them gone, he'd have to try a lot harder.

Night fell. The bean was gone. He followed routines - ones he scarcely strayed from. It would be hours before his return.

Finch made their way to the kitchen. They pushed up the trapdoor and strolled through the cupboard. They still had to be careful: just because the human wasn't home didn't mean they could throw all caution to the wind. Leaving evidence was a massive negatory. Finch didn't care for stupid rules, but the rules of borrowing were locked in their brain. They were already careless with the bagels, something they couldn't afford again. Desperation wasn't an excuse for sloppy borrowing - not when it exposed them.

Finch observed the boxes and containers around them, reading labels and calculating risk and reward. There was no chance of getting into that cereal box, but the nutrition bars would be a good grab. The box was short and already open. Finch pushed a can of tuna against it and hopped on. They began extracting a bar only to realize they had no way of getting something so large home without a sled.

"No, that'd be too easy." With a huff, Finch dropped it and shoved the can back into place. "'cause food can never be-" plastic crinkled under their foot "-easy?" Finch inspected the blue packaging. It was an open bag of tortilla chips. They grinned.

The scent of corn chips filled the space as Finch unfurled the bag. They dropped their backpack and started breaking the triangular chips into smaller pieces. Salt-free, too? Hell, yes. They tested the backpack's weight, put a bit more inside, then pulled the strings tight. They slung the strap across their chest. Oh, yeah, this would last them a good while. Finch fought with the chip bag, trying to roll the top underneath like it was before.

"Come on. Stupid fuckin'-" They tried to simultaneously lift the heavy bag and pull the other end.

Over the sounds of plastic popping and crackling in their ears, Finch didn't hear a door open and shut.

DOOM.

They did, however…

DOOM.

…feel the approaching footsteps of the human bean.

Finch froze. Blue eyes snapped wide open, their head flinching away from the plastic. It couldn't be...

Finch bolted.

He's supposed to be out why is he back-

DOOM.

They didn't need to know why he was back - just that he was and he was approaching at an alarming rate.

DOOM.

Oh, fuck, that's actually really close-

The doors ripped open. The hinges didn't even get a chance to squeak.

Finch stumbled. Air caught in their throat. For a moment, Finch was rooted to the floor. Just a moment. Long enough to see the human's form towering beyond the counter, covered in some kind of dark red leather. Long enough to see boots more than capable of squishing the life out of them.

Legs like fenceposts bent as the human came unbelievably closer. Closer than Finch had ever been to a bean. A giant face suspended above them, features blank and expressionless. Not once did the bean look at them.

Finch ran. They didn't look back. When they reached the hole in the floor, they plugged it up and kept going. Keep running.

Only when they reached the safety of their shelter did they falter.

"Oh, shit," they gasped, resting their weight on a nearby post. If their heart didn't outright stop, they were sure it might burst from their ribcage. Finch felt that exploding was a reasonable response. "He didn't see me." The scene replayed in their mind, over and over like a glitched tape. "I'm fine. You're fine. He didn't see you. There's no way he saw you. Just breathe."

Delusion, like they said. It was a powerful thing. It pulled many tricks on the mind. Like convincing oneself that they weren't discovered.

The apartment was quiet. Too quiet, one might even say, if they weren't one Matt Murdock. He never got that phrase. Nothing was 'too quiet'. In his - correct - opinion, nothing was quiet enough. There was always something creaking, breathing, or thumping, even in the smallest hours of the night. But on some front he had to agree: there was a suspicious lack of activity from the critter in the floor lately. Reluctant as he was to admit it, he couldn't deny that it wasn't an animal. Animals didn't mutter to themselves, in full sentences, in English. He wasn't mentally, emotionally, or spiritually prepared to assess beyond whatever that meant. In the moments his mind wandered, however - such as now, sitting and listening to a recording for his current case - he found himself pondering the tiny being regardless.

The peace wasn't an accident. Finch had been avoiding that place, giving themself and the air time to settle. They continued work on their residence, slotting together panels of wood and cardboard to form walls. One room would do for now - they just needed protection from the elements and potential scavengers slinking around. Skies above, if a cockroach tried anything, it was next on the menu. Grind up the little fucker into a smoothie. Finch wished a bug would: it'd be miles better than those godforsaken tortilla chips. Finch gave the wood posts they'd just secured a good push, nodding in satisfaction and moving on to the wall. It would be the last one to seal up their box of a house.

Four days. It'd been four days since Finch was nearly discovered; four days since they stared a bean in the face and got away unscathed. Four days since they got an answer to what they'd only suspected: the human couldn't see. That explained the brilliantly bright billboard, the sensitive hearing, the lack of lights - it explained a lot. Finch had to re-evaluate their approach to borrowing. This human would be extra careful about his possessions - the sock was proof enough - and notice what was out of place. In some ways, this both simplified and complicated things.

But borrowers were nothing if not adaptable.

Finch ventured up to a peephole in the wall and looked out. Nothing had changed except the bean now sitting at the dining table, papers and an electronic box neatly laid out on the tabletop. Casually dressed, he was listening to… a podcast? No, too personal. Finch liked podcasts. There was a crime involved, but this sounded like a conversation Finch would overhear more than something designed to entertain. So this bean worked in solving crimes. A detective?

They listened to the dry as hell audio a scant longer before growing bored and moving on. Hey, at least the bean was preoccupied.

Naturally, they found themself puttering toward the kitchen. Wielding two bent nails tied to their belt, Finch climbed up the cupboard door, using hinges and decorative bevels alike to hoist themself up. Those bagels were good. Were there any left? Nothing but corn chips really wore down a person's capacity to give a damn. They perused the counter, confident that the bean was sufficiently distracted by his work. Finch was disappointed to find the bagels sealed in an airtight container. It was their own fault, slicing up the bag so messily. They pulled a face and resumed their search.

A plate of mostly-eaten pasta sat before them. Fuck yes! Finch scuttled to it, pulling out rolls of tinfoil from their bag. Careful to avoid crinkling, they gathered up all the leftover noodles and sauce that would fit.

Finch squirreled away their haul, licking their fingers clean of evidence and ignorant of the man listening to their heist just a few metres away.

Matt stopped paying attention to the tape some time ago.

The sounds of Hell's Kitchen couldn't drown out the little inhabitant in his walls. A scent had blown into the room, vaguely familiar with hints of tortilla chip. He sat straighter and listened, idly shuffling papers and tip-tapping his fingers on the table. He found himself unable to be anything other than impressed as they scaled his counter like a mountain climber. Whatever was left from dinner became his visitor's latest plunder. That was fine; less waste, right?

He was disappointed when they returned to the walls. He wound back the recording to get some work done, but found himself consistently distracted by his small neighbour's goings-on. This discovery was just so unique, so strange - how could he not be curious? He heard them venture out again, across the apartment now. Into his bedroom. What could they be doing?

Oho, if Matt found any more socks missing-

He turned in his seat, about to rise, when he heard:

"You hafta to be shittin' me."

The voice, quiet in size only and bold beyond that, was the mildly annoyed tone of someone who'd been inconvenienced. Matt had heard it before, in the late hush of the night, when no one else would. Muttered curses and remarks that blended into the creaking and groaning of buildings and chatter and sirens of the city. One voice that Matt Murdock had tried very hard not to think too much about.

"When is enough too much, huh?" the voice griped. "Does he think I'm just gonna lay on one? 'Oh, felt silly today, stepped on the massive rug of glue.' How 'bout I drag this onto your floor, see how you feel walkin' in a minefield?" They growled. "UGH. Beans."

Well.

There was no denying it anymore, was there? A tiny person was living in the walls of Matt's apartment.

Matt leaned back, processing. He'd tried ignoring it - for the sake of his mental health and faith - because it was insane. It was impossible. It shouldn't be.

And yet…

Matt wanted - needed - to investigate further.

He got up, quietly, light on his feet. He didn't make it two steps before he heard a swear and the tiny person retreated once more. Into an electrical outlet, by the sounds of it.

Hm. He couldn't sneak up on them - not this time. They heard him- no. Matt quirked his head, considering. They felt him approaching. Like Matt, they could feel vibrations. Vibrations that alerted them of a threat. It only made sense.

Heh, 'threat'. Regular ol' Matt Murdock was the threat this time, not his alter ego. Wasn't that something?

The next time Matt encountered his new neighbour, he was trying - and failing - to fall asleep. There was too much on his mind for sleep. Frustrated, he huffed and flopped over, restless, his thoughts racing. Sounds of the city were extra distracting tonight. He considered getting up and making a cup of tea - maybe that would calm his mind.

Noises from the kitchen drew his scattered focus. He sat up, listening to the scuffing and tapping that he'd come to recognize as his uninvited houseguest. Three visits in one day. Were they always this proactive? Well, he did interrupt their attempted heist of his bedroom. Matt scooted to the edge of the bed. He would make that tea, actually. As he stood, he remembered sneaking didn't work last time. Right. Heavy-footed. However, he had a hunch that this attempt would yield a sneakier result.

Aided by socks, Matt softly padded through his apartment. Tiny - the name he assigned his little visitor - was fiddling with some kind of packaging on the top shelf. And as he got closer, lo and behold, they did not startle. His theory was correct: the further Tiny was from the floor, the weaker their pallesthesia became. Their ability to detect vibrations just wasn’t as sensitive as his own. Once he stepped foot into the kitchen, Matt dropped the Daredevil act and let himself be known. He grabbed a mug and turned on the kettle. Tiny's pulse quickened; their breath hitched. He gave them time to hide before he opened the cupboard for a tea bag. He quickly realized the box wasn't in its usual spot - his own doing, unfortunately.

"Stupid tea bags," he muttered for Tiny's sake; an 'I'm not looking for you, I swear!' assurance as he searched the cabinets. For extra sauce, he added, "Always misplacing them."

Would he forgo tea? He did start the kettle… as much as he got a kick out of playing the part of oblivious blind guy, causing Tiny undue terror wasn't his end goal. He wanted to test them, their cockiness, not scare them. Tiny may be a thief, but they were just trying to survive. Why else was food their number one haul? Matt dedicated his life to helping people in need. Wasn't Tiny part of that demographic? Weren't they someone in need? Unless small people were running drug cartels and trafficking rings, Tiny was innocent.

Doubt and guilt crept in. Maybe he was pushing the bit too far.

Matt was just about to get up and leave when something square and coarse pressed into his fingers.

He faltered, then pinched it, rubbing his thumb over the material. Its strong, earthy scent gave it away.

A tea bag.

Small shoes lightly retreated. Matt withdrew his hand. He held the sachet of dried herbs, cogs turning in his mind. He tilted his head.

Tiny handed him a tea bag. That…

Matt found himself puzzled and oddly touched. It was for their own good, to avoid getting found, but he couldn't not appreciate the nice gesture. He easily smelt where the tea was, of course. But Tiny didn't know that. Huh.

Maybe he was being too harsh about the sock.

The kettle's bubbling pitch rose to a squeal. Wincing, Matt shut it off. He dropped the tea bag into the mug and poured steaming water over it.

What a strange experience. He wondered what Tiny was thinking. Their heartbeat eased into the fluttering pace that he learned was its resting rate. It was the trait that had him most convinced his roommate was a rodent of some sort, though the way they squeaked when startled was a close second.

Matt threw out the tea bag and took the mug to his room, leaving Tiny to their task.

The next day, he casually slipped questions about tiny people into a conversation with Foggy. (It was not casual and quite random, actually.)

"You mean, like… fairies?" Foggy cautiously asked.

Sort of? Matt didn't know whether Tiny could be considered a fairy. They certainly didn't seem like the fairy type, not with the kind of language he heard them utter. Did fairies say 'fuck'? Would that break some kind of fairy law?

Karen told him about a book series that she'd been obsessed with as a kid: it contained many smaller magical beings. Brownies, for instance. Matt settled on definitely not that one. What favours was he receiving? Aside from the tea bag - an isolated incident - absolutely none.

Matt wasn't convinced they were a magical creature. Really, they just… seemed like a normal person, albeit smaller. They hummed to themself, snickered at their own dumb jokes, and swore a hot streak that would impress even Castle and Jones. Matt was pretty damn sure they'd been building a house under his floor, though he noticed all the loud busywork was put on pause when he was home, most notably when he was sleeping. Another nice gesture that was also for their own self-preservation.

Maybe they were a mutant. Or maybe they were mutated, like him.

When Matt got home, he discarded the glue traps. It felt wrong to leave them now that he knew it was a person he'd been trying to catch. Guilty, he started leaving crumbs in easy-to-reach locations. It wouldn’t hurt him any - his grocery budget wasn’t gonna tank because of some scraps. If chips and leftovers were what they were after, then they had free reign over the countertop. That didn’t stop him from being cheeky about it, though - if Tiny was getting confident, he might as well play along.

He found Tiny’s courage something to marvel at. Roaming a giant’s home? Without fear? His vigilante persona was literally named Daredevil and he was impressed.

However, bravery and foolishness were not mutually exclusive. That’s when the cockiness came in.

Matt was minding his business, washing the dishes, when Tiny wandered out. Brows hitching up, he continued sponging the plate. Surely, they wouldn't-

Oh, but they did.

Unwavering, Tiny climbed up the counter they same way as before. They walked up to the pan on the stove and hooked a leg over. Matt fought hard not to chuffle. This was getting out of hand. Matt remembered an adage about not feeding animals or else they'd grow dependent. Had Matt inadvertently done exactly that? Animals that were accustomed to people often didn't see the danger. Tiny was certainly no animal, but the absence of caution they displayed in the moment was, frankly, ridiculous. It was a massive leap from the times they would flee his presence. He was starting to think he'd played too ignorant.

A smirk tugged at his lips upon hearing the leftover eggs being pilfered. When he turned to fetch the pan, Tiny was already hopping to the floor and disappearing behind the fridge.

Stealing right behind his back. When was enough too much, indeed.

AO3

Next

#g/t #giant/tiny #goldfinch (oc) #matt murdock #daredevil g/t #giant tiny #the borrowers #borrowers #g/t community #gt #g/t writing #daredevil #marvel g/t #marvel #marvel fanfiction #mcu fanfiction #daredevil fanfiction

[pehmokoira]

I think we could all use a morale booster after 2 weeks in the gravy basket, so I decided to write a few reasons why I believe Our Flag Means Death can still be saved!

Please note that I know literally nothing about how the industry actually works, I'm just clowning and these are opinions based on articles I've read etc. 🤡

Arrested Development was saved by Netflix after Fox cancelled it because of low ratings and viewership. Now, we can't know the numbers for OFMD for certain, but the ratings and reviews have been preeetty good, and season 2 even has a higher Tomatometer score than season 1. (96% vs. 93%) So in that sense, the chances are good. Everything was pointing towards renewal until January 9th!

Which gets me to my next point. If the cancellation really was one person's decision (DZ better watch his fucking step), then that means the show was as good as renewed and it HAD the numbers and the viewership and everything it needed to continue.

Each cancellation case is unique. It's kind of pointless to compare OFMD with any other cancelled show, because the chances of any show getting picked up after cancellation depend on so many things. Production costs, show quality, the potential of the show, viewership, probably also connections/relationships in the industry, etc. But it all boils down to money in the end.

Max is covering up the real reason for the cancellation by lying, which means they've completely fucked up by cancelling this show. Max is the one that looks bad right now, not OFMD. This is bad PR for Max.

David Jenkins has not told us to stop with our renewal efforts, which means there's hope. He knows more than we do. In Jenkins I trust. I won't give up until he tells us it's over.

It's only been 2 weeks and 1 day. It would've been something of a miracle if the show had been picked up in that short a time. Lucifer was saved by Netflix a month after the cancellation.

And lastly, the pros for OFMD:

The show hasn't been on a widely available international streaming service so far. Big potential for new audiences on a different platform.

The marketing for the show has been abysmal, but it's become a flagship series for Max despite that.

The fanbase is loud and passionate, and we've shouted about wanting to buy merch on X. We won't shut up about the show and that's a beautiful and important thing.

Max's lies about the cancellation are so transparent almost anyone can see through them. The people in the industry have probably noticed Max's pattern of cancelling shows about marginalized groups.

The representation in the show is something you don't find in any other show, and while that could be its downfall, it's also the greatest strength of the show. Bigger streaming services aren't as scared of queers as Max is.

The story that the show tells is quite unique.

These are just a few things that came to mind right now. Feel free to reblog and list more reasons if you can think of any!

Edit: I wrote another post about this too! That one's about ✨the numbers✨!

#ofmd #our flag means death #renew as a crew #save ofmd

[jessicaloons]

Chapter 2:

Hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you…

Masterlist - Previous - Next

5. October 2014:

Charles and I sat huddled together on the floor, backs leaned against the sofa. Dad in the armchair on the left, Hervé on the sofa, Arthur rolled up like a cat behind us.

"They shouldn’t race under this conditions, it’s not safe!" Hervé exclaimed and Dad nodded.

"They already stopped it to wait! They just should cancel it…" Dad agreed and Charles shook his head a little.

"It looks like they can still drive on the track, no?" he said and I nodded lightly.

"Yeah, but the sight for the one behind? Look at the spray! You don’t even want to close up the gaps because you don’t see any…" I began as one of the Sauber’s spun off the track and crashed into the barriers.

"Oh shit!" Arthur murmured behind us.

They waved a double yellow flag and Dad and Hervé scoffed.

"They should wave the red flag! There’s a crane next to the track! And why no safety car?"

We watched as the crane lifted up the sauber as a second car veered towards the same run-off area where the crane was and crashed right in it’s left rear wheel, the cameras cutting away from the crash site.

The livery showed exactly what team’s car it was.

"Who is that? Did you see?" Charles sat up abruptly, I saw the number of the car, 17.

"Charles… that is Jules…" I almost whispered as Hervé turned the TV volume up to listen to the broadcast properly.

I turned to look at Charles who paled and stiffened, then I grabbed his hand and squeezed it, he slowly turned to me, we both heard how the commentators said that Jules didn’t respond to his radio, and for the first time since I knew Charles, I saw something new flicker in his eyes: fear.

17. July 2015:

"Ok, calm down!" I tried to level Charles hot head but he just threw his helmet on the ground.

"He pushed me! Twice! Because of him I lost 3 positions! How was I supposed to get back up their in one lap?" he was fuming, understandably so.

"I know, but when you’re like this, it won’t help! You need to calm down!" I tried to reason with him, but he just scoffed.

"Calm down? Lizzie! He’s supposed to be our fucking teammate! But he always pulls shit like that? The last 3 races where all fucked up by him! I can’t afford to DNF that many times! I need good results!" he hissed and unzipped his suit.

"Charles, I know that all! But he is our teammate! You think you can’t effort some DNFs? We’ll think about being kicked out! So please! Calm down!" I grabbed him by his shoulders and he looked at me.

"He‘s still a little fucker!" he pouted.

"That he is!" I answered und hugged him.

"I just need to show the sponsors that I’m good and have potential! It’s so important!" he whispered and I sighed.

With two sons in motorsport, money ran out and Charles’ parents had to decide that for now they could only finance one career. Charles continued, as the older one and with having slightly more potential than Arthur, it was decided. Charles hated it and promised Arthur he would give his all to impress some sponsors and hopefully be able to get him back into karting and more.

But right now, it didn’t look too good as one of our teammates, Martin, was more than reckless and didn’t gave a shit whenever he kicked someone out of the race.

"I just want to leave." he stated and looked for his stuff, threw all his belongings in his backpack and then looked at me. I sighed and packed my stuff up as well.

"Let’s go, Charlie bear." I said and pushed him as he just groaned.

"You know how much I hate it when you call me that!" he glared at me.

"You secretly love it, just admit it!" I said and gave him my sweetest smile as he rolled his eyes.

"I just need to think of a name for you that you hate!" he said and we walked out where my brother was waiting for us, alone.

"Where’s the rest?" I asked him and Charles looked up from his phone and dropped it, paling instantly.

"I’m so sorry Charles. Your parents are already on their way, Mum and Dad are on their way and picking up Arthur, we’ll meet them in the hospital." my brother said it quietly and approached Charles then pulled him into his arms. I bent down, picking up Charles’ phone and saw the message from Lorenzo "Jules est mort" Jules died. We all knew that it didn’t look good, his condition had deteriorated. But still. He was there in some way. But now he was gone.

I stood there and didn’t know what to do, what to say. Over the last few years Jules became like another older brother to me, although our relationship never even close got to the connection that Charles and Jules had. Marcus released Charles and he stood there, silent tears rolling down his cheeks. I grabbed his hand and intertwined our fingers, then we followed my brother to the car.

The drive to Nice was quiet. No one spoke, no music was played. I sat next to Charles in the backseat and held his hand. He didn’t move once, he just stared out the window. As we parked in front of the hospital, Marcus called Dad and a couple of minutes later my parents parked next to us, as they got out the car I saw how Mum slung an arm around Arthur’s shoulders. His eyes glassy, nose red. My Dad hugged Charles instantly.

"We’re waiting here for you. Just close family and friends. We don’t want to interrupt." my Dad explained and Charles nodded, Mum gave Arthur a kiss on his cheek and then did the same with Charles.

I stood next to Marcus who pulled me to his side and kissed my temple. As they started walking away Charles looked up and turned around, he looked at me.

"Can you come with me? Please, ma belle?" he said and stretched his hand out, I nodded and hastily stepped up and took his hand.

"Thank you." he whisperd and we walked into the hospital.

The funeral reception was attended by almost the entire F1 grid and some big names of the motorsports community. Even TV crews were around and I hated how they zoomed in on Charles and his family, rude reporters were yelling questions their way. During the whole morning, on the way to church, inside and on our way out, I held Charles hand and never let go once. Whenever I saw that it all overwhelmed him I gave his hand a gentle squeeze and as he looked up I smiled encouraging. When we were sitting on his bed in the evening, tired and exhausted, he looked at me for some time and I cocked an eyebrow.

"What?" I asked quietly.

"How did you do it?" he asked and I looked at him confused "How did you manage to be so… so put together? He was important to you too! But you were just so… why weren’t you crying?" his voice was hoarse but it almost sounded accusatory.

"Don’t say it like that! Don’t think I didn’t cry! But I just… I wanted to be strong for you! I wanted to be there for you! I know how important he was to you! How much you loved him! And I was just… we were not like you…" I whispered as a tear slipped down my face and Charles looked heartbroken.

"I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that, ma belle! I just… you were so strong! I just didn’t know how you could be so strong when I was just so… I’m sorry! I’m sorry, that you thought you had to be strong for me and couldn’t just… ahhh I’m losing my English!" he said it with more and more frustration. Then he pulled me in his arms "I don’t know what I did to deserve you! I’m sorry that you thought you had to be strong for me! And I’m sorry for not being there for you, like you were for me!" he whispered and I hugged him tight.

"We’re always there for each other! You and me together!"

"You and me against the world!"

"Always!"

The weeks after Jules death weren’t easy for Charles, he was getting more and more frustrated with the situation within the team, or more with Martin. It was one week in September where the tension in the team got to a point where our coaches and supervisors finally had enough and sat Martin and Charles down and for some reason I had to participate too in this crisis meeting, not really knowing why.

"Why is Lizzie here? She has nothing to do with this!" Charles asked what I wanted to know.

"She’s here because she’s always caught in between you two! Last race she lost 3 positions because you two were fighting each other and made contact with her! And she’s here for you Charles, because when she’s around your attitude changes for the better!" Matthieu said and I rolled my eyes, while Martin just grinned.

"Wipe that grin out of your face! You’re the reason we’re here in the first place! Why the fuck can’t you be a team player?" I was furious.

"Lizzie!" Matthieu groaned.

"No Matthieu! It’s the truth! Since we’re racing for you, has there ever been a problem? No! He joins the team, behaves like an ass from day one, acts like he’s the king and we have to bow! Pushes us off the track and says then afterwards it was the adrenaline! He didn’t see us? Or we were in his line? It’s unfair!" I had to contain myself to not scream. Charles grabbed my hand under the table and squeezed it.

"I think what Lizzie wanted to say, is that we never fought that hard within our own team, but you for some reason think we have to make way for you on the track! But we don’t, especially when we’re in front and you can’t pass us and the only way for you is to push us off!" Charles said, trying to sound calm but firm.

"I don’t see a problem, I’m obviously better than you! And I’m not making way for you or your little girlfriend, Leclerc!" Martin spat and Charles slammed his fist on the table.

“You don’t have to make way for me or my little girlfriend, BECAUSE WE ARE ALWAYS IN FRONT OF YOU!!!" Charles was furious and I could see that it wouldn’t take much for him to lose his temper completely.

"Yeah, sure Leclerc! Matthieu, I don’t care about them, I’m here to show that I am the best, that’s why a team from GP3 will approach me soon and then I don’t even care what you’re doing… Lizzie you won’t make it into any higher league, Leclerc.. well we’ll see." he sneered and I took a deep breath, I actually didn’t wanted to say it already, but I was fuming.

"Just so you know, Martin, I was approached by the Art Grand Prix Team and I will drive for them in GP3 next year…" I said and Martin’s eyes widened. Charles next to me inhaled sharply and I looked at him apologising but he just grinned.

"Yep and I will be her teammate next year… so, you were saying?" Charles smirked at Martin who got up and left.

"What just happened?" I looked at Charles who just pulled me into a hug.

"I didn’t wanted to tell you, because you haven’t heard something and I… I don’t know I just wanted to wait until you also got a seat!" Charles mumbled and I laughed relieved.

"Same! I was waiting for you getting a seat!" I answered and Charles chuckled.

We both then congratulated us at the same time and we laughed even more. Matthieu cleared his throat and we looked sheepishly at him.

"I’m so proud of you both! When they called and asked some questions about you I just knew that they would approach you both! You will be missed!" he said and got up and hugged us.

"But what are we doing now with Martin?" I asked and he shook his head.

"I’ll handle him, don’t worry! We’re only having a handful of races left for the season, we’ll deal with him!" he said and laughed.

Charles and I left and walked to where our parents were.

"So, GP3 next year?" I asked.

"GP3 next year, F2 the year after!" Charles answered and I just laughed and he pulled me into his side "You and me, against the world, Lizzie!"

"Always!" I replied and he smiled at me. And not for the first time I felt butterflies doing summersaults in my stomach.

"I swear to god, if I break any bones because of you, Leclerc, you’re a dead man walking!" I yelled and Charles only shook his head and breezed away on his ski’s. I leaned forwards and quickly caught up to him "We’re dead if they find out where we are!"

"Oh come on! It’s not our first time on a black slope!" he yelled back and accelerated and I followed him.

"But this is an orange one!" I yelled and passed him easily on my snowboard, then raced down the slope. As I arrived in the valley and waited for Charles I saw Lorenzo and Marcus talking to some girls, thankfully they hadn’t seen me and as soon as Charles arrived next to me I ushered him away.

"Why are we hiding behind the ski lift?" Charles asked taking his shades off.

"Because our brothers are there! When they see that we’re here instead of the slope we told our parents we would be, they’ll snitch on us or use it as leverage!" I answered and he nodded.

"Good thinking, Doetterer!" he said and I peered around the corner.

"They’re leaving!" I said and Charles nodded. "Let’s go back to the château, we’re already late!“

We stood together on the patio, everyone with a glass of champagne in hand.

"10… 9… 8… 7… 6… 5… 4… 3… 2… 1… Happy New Year!" we were all cheering as the fireworks down in the village started. Charles pulled me close and hugged me.

"This is going to be our year, ma belle! We show the world that we’ll make it into F1, just like Max did!" he whispered and then kissed my cheek.

"You and me against the world." I whispered, trying to ignore the heat that spread on my face from his kiss.

"Always!" Charles replied and hugged me even tighter.

"Look at our two lovebirds… I think we really can start with the planning of their wedding!" Pascale said quietly to the others who all watched us.

"These two idiots are so oblivious! They will need years to realise that they’ve always belonged together!" Dad shrugged and they all started laughing, startling Charles and me and we looked over to our families, who were pretending to not notice us watching them.

"What does that mean exactly?" I asked in Italian and Charles next to me smiled proudly at me, for the past years he did his best to teach me Italian.

"You will basically be kind of our test and development drivers, drive for Haas or Sauber in some FP sessions, work in the simulator, be contracted to us for a considerable time." Massimo said and Charles looked at me, then our Dad's.

"Contracted to Ferrari?" my Dad asked and I’m jealous that his Italian sounds flawless.

"Yes, if the opportunity arises a promotion to Formula 1 might be possible in the future!” Massimo answered and I looked at Charles with big eyes.

"Surely you mean into a Ferrari powered partner team for the beginning?” Dad stated and Massimo nodded.

"Of course! A seat in Ferrari must be well earned and as a rookie it’s not easy to secure a seat at a top team! That’s why we have with Haas and Sauber our partnered teams!" Massimo said, Dad and Hervé looked satisfied.

"So? What do you say? Will you join the Ferrari Driver Academy?" he asked me and Charles and we looked at each other, then smiled.

"Where do we sign?" we both said in unison and Massimo handed us some documents and a pen each.

"He would be so proud of you, you know?" I whispered and Charles looked up "Starting in GP3, now a member of the Ferrari Driver Academy!"

"He would be proud of both of us…" he answered and I smiled. We sat together on the balcony of our hotel room, watching the setting sun "When will you leave?"

"Our flight is in the morning, Mum insist that I come home for the tutoring sessions…" I mumbled and Charles laughed quietly.

"Come on, only a couple more weeks and then you’re done!" he encouraged me and I nodded.

"I can’t wait for it to be over! I get it, she wanted me to graduate school, but I honestly don’t even know what I would do other than racing!" I answered and Charles chuckled as Dad stepped onto the balcony.

"You guys ready?" he asked and I nodded.

"Let’s go!" Charles said and got up "Pasta time!"

"Pizza and Pasta time!" I said and we followed our dads to our car.

At the famous Ristorante Montana we were greeted not only by Massimo, but also Sebastian and Maurizio Arrivabene.

"Lizzie! It’s so good to see you!" Sebastian said and hugged me "Charles, good to see you too!" he patted Charles back and then greeted our Dads.

"So you’re the future of Ferrari?" Arrivabene said and Charles and I got caught off guard "I’m just messing with you, I mean not entirely! We expect great things from you! But for now, let’s enjoy tonight and in the next weeks we will see what to do with you!"

With that said we had an amazing evening together. Talking about the upcoming races in GP3, some races we could attempt later in the year. Meeting Ferraris second driver Kimi Räikkönen, Ferraris last world champion. As we said our goodbyes and got back in the car Charles and I could only smile from ear to ear.

"Oh come one, Lizzie! It’s just 4 days!" Charles whispered and hugged me tighter.

"That’s not the point! I just don’t want to go home and have 3 days full of tutoring! Can’t we start celebrating on Saturday? 3 day bash for an 18th birthday?" I answered and Charles laughed.

"Nope! You’re coming on Monday and then we’ll celebrate!" he just said and I only nodded, hugged Hervé goodbye and together with Dad I went through the security check.

"Little owl, you should smile! You’re starting in GP3 in 2 weeks, you’re now a member of the FDA, you’re turning 18 on Monday! Cheer up, would ya!" Dad tried to brighten my mood and I shrugged my shoulders "I know you don’t like tutoring, but it’s only a handful of days and then you’ll have your exams and you’re done with school!” the thought of that made me smile.

He was right. Good things were about to happen…

————————————————————————

Little Note:

That’s it, chapter 2 is out - a bit sad, but it’s a part of Charles’ life, therefore part of Lizzie’s 😔. But Chapter 3 is going to be a really funny one! And for the first time we’ll have a little bit of Charles' POV…

Please leave a comment/ like/ reblog/ message and tell me how you liked it! I’m dying to hear your thoughts! I’m open to any criticism, bad or good, it doesn’t matter!

If you want to be added to the taglist, drop a comment!

Last but not least, English is not my first language and although I tried my best: please forgive me any mistakes I made!

All pictures are from Google, Pinterest, Instagram, etc.

#charles leclerc #charles leclerc 16 #formula one #formula 1 #f1 2023 #scuderia ferrari #ferrari #female driver #charles leclerc x female reader #charles leclerc f1 #charles leclerc fic #f1 x reader #f1 fic #f1 fanfic #cl16 x reader #cl16 #cl16 imagine #f1 x female driver #f1 fandom #charles leclerc x reader #f1 imagine #f1 ferrari #charles leclerc ferrari #charles leclerc fanfic

[nadia-cannot-think-straight]

This is more or less a speculation, not a theory.

I have read some pretty decent post act 3 Arcane fanfics, yet one thing always bothers me a little bit about them. It is an obvious thing that Viktor will return to Zaun at some point, like this is inevitable. The same goes to his falling out with Jayce. Many people have created some cool scenarios on how it will happen, and i appreciate every single one of them.

With that said, i really cannot imagine Viktor getting banished as an event that starts it all. For a simple reason.

I don't think Viktor would have been bitter about it.

With the way he acts in the last episode of season 1, i believe that he'd think it was deserved. The thing he could be charged for would be an illegal experimentation and the manslaughter of Sky Young. Things he feels so guilty about he tried to off himself. He has very little time left, and if the trial is a necessary procedure, he'd probably accept it. Would he be upset? Of course, but i don't think he would even try to put an effort to avoid it, once people find out. And at the peak of panic in Piltover after Jinx's attack, the whatever the hell is left off the council would try to ensure that there is still at least a renmant of government control. Just like in act 1, that was literally the reason why Enforcers were trying to arrest 4 kids.

If anything, i think it would be Jayce who'd be the most desperate in this situation. "He'd be mad at Viktor for killing an innocent person" he literally did the same thing (if you think about it, Jayce have killed so much more people besides that kid, we just don't discuss it because in the show they are presented as scary monsters, not human beings that got drugged the hell up and now have their entire ripcage obligarated. But y'know, that's the point of this scene). "What about Viktor's illegal experimentation?" What Jayce did with Vi was also kinda illegal? I mean, he is a councilor, he can do whatever the fuck he wants ig, but before hand it was clear that other councilors would not want that to happen.

I imagine that Jayce would do anything in his power to cancel this trial. Viktor is his best friend, person who he has such a close bond to. And while what he did was wrong, he isn't much better. Yet it is Viktor, his dying friend, who is punished.

I can see Viktor actually being like: it's okay Jayce, it needs to happen, i will be okay (he's lying but trying).

So yeah i don't think that Viktor being banished to Zaun would be a death blow to their relationship.

Buuuuut you know what would probably make more sense (at least to me :3)?

Viktor's punishment being working on hextech weapons against Zaun.

Think about it. Jayce in an act of desperation convinces other councilors that as a co-founder of Hextech Viktor would be a viable asset in designing weapons that would "protect" Piltover against Zaun.

Well wouldn't that make Viktor absolutely fucking furious. Viktor may have ****kinda**** accepted his death but making him work AGAINST the city he spend his entire life wishing to improve and protect? Over his dead body, he'd rather be eaten alive by rats in Undercity alleys than do such a thing.

It works for me much better because it keeps Jayce's character much more consistent. Like, it's understandable why would he do it (he doesn't want his friend to die) but also highlights his change in priorities after season 1. Like, he told Silco that Undercity doesn't stand a chance against Piltover, and well, one rocket proved hin wrong. Now there are dead people in Piltover. I think he'd be more radical, more bold, maybe even less forgiving and 100% stressed af.

Does he want to keep Viktor safe? Yes. But does he find building weapons is now necessary when they are at war? Also yes. And considering the "I'M from the Undercity" scene he also tends to forget that Viktor is not, in fact, Piltovan, that as much as he loves Jayce, he does not associate with Piltover society. He is from Zaun, it is an important part of his indentity. Something that Jayce keeps neglecting.

It also doesn't change the fact that he still feels guilty over the death of that ONE child. Not the countless men in chemtanks, that are as much victims of Undercity's terrible state as Viktor is really. I think that when he'd make a decisions "a necessary decisions to keep them saved" he'd think about them, scary, crazy monsters with blades. Not that one kid. Kid feels so much more personal, people who attack them-not.

I'm not saying that is how the conflict in season 2 will look like, nuh-uh, it's just me making some fanfiction prompts lmao.

Anything could happened since them. Viktor trying to sabotage their work which would end up in an explosive and dramatic break up once Jayce finds out? Yep, i can see that. Add some fire and leave Viktor crying on concrete floor, now we have some nice parallels. But i can also see Viktor fucking off right there and there, or other stuff i dunno.

So yeah i have fanfic ideas.

#txt #arcane #arcane viktor #jayce talis #jayvik #arcane spoilers #fanfiction prompts #i guess #??? #divorce era #just me brainstorming tbh #btw yes i didn't mention hexcore at all #i just didn't thought it was relevant to this specific plot point #but this shit could probably mess up some stuff too #i am sorry for every grammar mistake too #me not native english speaker me stupid

[thelittleliars]

New Year

Warnings: kinda fluff?

Words: 2.2K

Summary: Wanda dragged you to the Avengers Compound after your friends cancelled last minute on New Year's Eve.

AN: I have a lot of stories stored in my drafts but this is the first one I'll publish so be warned about the awful writing!

You sat with best friend Wanda in some random pub on new year’s eve since all your other friends cancelled on you last minute. Wanda was so nice and rescued you from being alone in the pub. She promised to stay for a couple of drinks before going home or just somewhere else. 

"Y/N, let’s go. You’ve had enough drinks." Wanda said but you tried to ignore her words. You sit so comfortable that you don’t want to get up and get dragged somewhere else. "Give me a good reason to get up right now." You groaned.

"You said you wanted to get kissed by some random girl, right?" You nodded eagerly at her. "Look around you.. do you actually see any woman here?" She was right, there was no other women than you two. "Well.. there is always you." You tease her shamelessly. Wanda gaped at you even though she was used to your flirtiness. "You know, if I weren’t wholeheartedly in love with Vision I’d still say no to you."

You grabbed your chest and acted as if her words hurt deeply. "Wanda.. how could you do this to me? My poor heart. So broken now.. thank you." She giggled at your goofiness before she slapped your arm and got a serious look on her face. "I know a place with a few girls who’s love to volunteer to kiss you at midnight." Wanda wanted you to come back to the Avengers Compound. You were there only once or twice but that was enough for almost every female Avenger, their friends and other STARK employees to be extremely smitten by you and asked Wanda a lot about you. The poor redhead tried so many times to get you to come and visit her but the Compound just wasn’t your type of place.

You paid for your drinks immediately after hearing Wanda’s words. Then followed her like a lost puppy to the Avenger’s Compound without any question. As soon as you two walked through the doors of the living room all eyes were on you. 

"Y/N Y/L/N, you’re alive!" Yelena shouted with excitement while Kate choked on her drink. The archer got a huge crush on you and Yelena teased her about it all the time. Sharon Carter immediately rushed to your side and asked if you wanted a drink. Before you could even say anything Wanda told her that you already had a good amount of alcohol in you. You thanked Sharon with a huge smile. The moment she saw you smile at her, her knees gave in a bit and almost made a fool out of herself.

The Black Widow didn’t like the way you smiled at Sharon. It made her fucking furious. "Wanda did you manipulate Y/N’s mind in order for them to come here?" Wanda smirked at you before she looked back at Natasha. "She willingly came after I said I know a place with girls who’d love to kiss her at midnight since she so desperately wanna be kissed by a girl." The entire room fell silent. Nobody but Yelena knew what to say or do. The younger Black Widow laughed loudly at the fact that Wanda called not only you out but also all of her fellow Avengers that had a crush on you. You were glad that the younger Widow reacted because you did not handle that awkward silence well. "So who is it gonna be?" This time it was Natasha who asked and that shocked you deeply. You did not expect the redhead to ask this. 

Every woman in the living room looked at you intently. You felt the pressure of deciding right there and then.  "Each one of you need to give me a good reason why you should be the one." You said not expecting anyone to give you an actually answer. Kate was the first one who stumbled out her answer. "I’m the world greatest female archer." Brunnhilde shrugged before she told you she’s King of New Asgard and can treat you like a queen that you are. Carol Danvers offered you to fly with her. Sharon only gaped like a fish since she didn’t know what to say. Maria offered a high security secret and Natasha threatened not to kill you. Yelena snorted, "Dear sister we all know you are not a killer anymore so you need a better reason than that to be kissed by your crush."

The shock they all gave you sobered you a bit up. You actually didn’t care who kissed you that night, you only wanted a kiss by a cute girl and now almost all Avengers offered you to kiss them. "Whoever finds Y/N at midnight gets to kiss them!" Wanda announced to everyone since she saw you struggle with choosing someone. 

You tried to find the perfect spot to hide, a spot where it's not too easy but also not too hard to get found so you ended up on the rooftop. The harsh cold wind blows from time to time and you wished you brought a jacket.

Time flew by fast and it soon turned into 11:59PM. The second you thought of giving up and find yourself an Avenger to kiss, a hand came out of nowhere to cover up your mouth. Their other, warm hand covered your eyes. You got the message of keeping your eyes closed. 

The woman behind you hesitantly lowered her hand from your mouth. "I’ll keep my eyes closed but please just kiss me already." You begged her. In the background you heard the other mostly male Avengers counting down from 10. Anxiety and anticipation filled you like nothing else in your life. And you only realized that she removed her hand from your eyes when you felt her soft lips on yours. All the yelling and fireworks in the background become numb. The only focus were the lips from the woman in front of your. You two kissed for a solid few minutes but you didn’t dare to open your eyes. The second that you did, the lovely girl that you kissed wasn’t even in front of you anymore. 

You stood there stunned with your fingers ghosting over your lips when Wanda came up on the rooftop to tease you but changed her mind the second she saw the look on your face. "I-I.. I didn’t even get to know who she was." One kiss was all it took to crave more. One kiss and you were a goner for the mystery women. 

Wanda stayed with you for a couple of minutes before she excused herself to find Vision. You needed another 5-10 minutes to calm down and face every Avenger downstairs. When you walked back into the living room the boys sheered and wished you a happy new year. Of course you wished everyone a hoppy new year back.

In your head, you told yourself you can face the girls but when you hear Kate giggle at something Clint said, all your confidence vanished. Right the second afterwards Yelena came back with a bottle of Vodka. She saw you and smiled devilishly. "Y/N you’re back! Who did you get to kiss??"

"And more important how was the kiss?" Tony butted into the conversation. "It could have been only good with how much time she took before coming back." Natasha said with a look in your direction before she took the straw in her mouth and took a sip of the smoothie she somehow got in the time you were gone. [You found the move incredibly hot and imagined her kissing you.]

Heat rushed to your cheeks fast. You didn't think about how red faced you actually were since that would've added even more embarrassment. "I don’t kiss and tell." You hoped your answer would end this conversation and it did for a while. Maria, out of all came to you 15-20 minutes later to directly ask you who you kissed. The information was strictly needed to keep up the work environment the way it always was, those were her words. 

You didn’t tell Maria anything but you reassured her that nothing would interfere the work environment since you won’t be visiting the Compound often anyways. After the short conversation with Maria you felt exhausted and wanted to go home. Wanda was nowhere to be found which got you super frustrated. How could she leave you alone with all the other people you barely knew? In your rushed state to find Wanda, you did not see Natasha in your view. The Widow was about to curse the person with ugly words when she saw it was you crashing into her. "Oh god. I’m so sorry! I was looking for Wanda and must have not realized where I was going." You apologized. 

Natasha nodded at your apology and told you that Wanda had gone with Vision to his room. Since you looked into Natasha’s beautiful green eyes you have not heard a single word she said. You were just too busy being mesmerized by the beauty of her eyes. Oh how you wished that the new year’s countdown was right there and then. The other women must have said something else you hadn’t heard since suddenly the back of her hand is on your forehead. "I uhh what?" You stammered out. "I asked if you were feeling alright?" NO you wanted to say. You weren’t alright ever since the kiss happened. But how could you tell THE BLACK WIDOW that? Especially with not knowing which whom the kiss was. 

Instead you blamed it on the drinks. "I guess the alcohol is taking a toll on me." Natasha teared her eyes away. She guessed that it wasn’t the whole truth but she had no right to ask you further. "I could take you to Wanda’s room?" You could’t seem to find words to answer so you just nodded. 

As soon as Natasha lead you to Wanda's room, she left you alone and you threw yourself onto the bed. Your brain swirled with thoughts of the kiss with the unknown woman. It soon turned into the vision of Natasha and you kissing. At that point you knew you would not get any sleep. So you got up, took a blanket and found the way upstairs to the rooftop. To your surprise Natasha sat there on a chair. She seemed to be in deep thought but still heard you coming. 

"Couldn't sleep?" She asked you almost whispering. "Did you ever overthought things right before falling asleep?" You asked but didn't wait for an answer. "I can't stop thinking about tonight which is rare since I usually just make something up to force other thoughts out but it feels as if someone controls me.. controls my thoughts."

She hummed at your words. "Do you think Wanda has something to do with that?" Natasha finally looked at you or rather stared in your eyes. "She wouldn't do that to me, right?" You questioned yourself and Wanda. "I’ve seen her do crazier things for something she had good intentions for." You let out a deep sigh. If Wanda really manipulated your thoughts then what motive had she? "I can’t think of why she would do it, that means if she actually has something to do with this."

Natasha smiled at you. She found it cute that even though you questioned and kinda doubted Wanda, you still defended the witch. But then her whole persona changed. "I can’t help you since I don’t know what’s going on in your head." She shrugged, trying so hard not to show more emotions. The Widow was unsure about how she felt about you and the tiny feelings she already had in that moment didn’t help her at all. She stood up and walked towards you. She was super intimidating and her proximity made your heart race extremely fast. Somehow she was hovering over you with her tiny frame. One look at her lips and you were a goner. You craved to taste her lips, craved to feel her lips against yours, you wanted her to be as close as possible.

Natasha opened her mouth but whatever the widow was about to say it died in her throat. She heard and saw the younger widow with her friend Kate coming and took a step backwards. You sensed that the woman in front of you cared a lot about what Yelena thought or she just didn’t want to be seen more vulnerable. You glanced at Yelena who had her eyebrow raised at her older sister. When you looked back at Natasha an extremely strong desire pilled inside of you. You honestly had no idea what came over you when you grabbed Natasha’s jacket collar and pulled her into a short kiss. The second you released your hands from her jacket you ran away. That left Natasha alone with Yelena and Kate who both looked as shocked as the older woman. 

The kiss confirmed two things for you. Firstly, the mystery woman who kissed you was Natasha . Secondly, you just fell in love with the Black Widow and couldn’t stop smiling even through your panicked state.

#marvel #natasha romanoff #black widow #wanda maximoff #yelena belova #maria hill #kate bishop #sharon carter #carol danvers #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha x you #natasha romanoff x you #natasha x y/n #black widow x reader #natasha x reader #natasha fluff #the avengers #New Year

[qqueenofhades]

bless u for the comprehensive answer to my last question, it is much appreciated! And sincere apologies for coming off as defeatist - you're absolutely right that, at the end of the day, the most important thing is working as hard as we can to make sure trump loses the general election. What this really clarifies for me is that my focus should be on the elections, and that I should file the judicial process under "interesting, could be useful, but will never be a silver bullet". Thank you again!

You're welcome, and I think it's most useful to think of it like this: we need to do our job (defeating Trump in 2024) so Jack Smith's job (indicting the fucker up the wazoo) will stick. We hear endless punditry and hand-wringing about how Trump will just cancel the charges if he wins, and that's often presented as some kind of terrible foregone conclusion that we will only avert by dumb luck, if we do at all. And yet, for some funny reason, we never hear about the flip side: i.e. if Trump loses, he's fucked. He will have no more reason to delay, no last-minute Hail Mary play, nothing to stop him from standing trial, being convicted, and going to jail, and that's exactly why he and the rest of the fascist criminals are throwing everything at the election. It is his last shot.

Honestly, I don't want people complacently thinking that the indictments will do the work for them and get rid of Trump -- because they will, but only if we do our job first and pound that motherfucker into the ground in 2024. I don't want anything to take away from the importance of doing everything we can to help Biden win in 2024 -- voting, volunteering, donating, talking to friends and family, you name it. We NEED to do that work so that Trump is out of miraculous golden parachutes and is left to face the consequences. And if he does (again, please God) lose, at least this time he is not the sitting American president and does not have the full resources of the federal government to attempt a coup. In that sense, if you want to see Trump properly, completely brought to justice, it's so easy:

Support the indictments

Vote for Biden in 2024

Do everything to make sure Trump loses

The end.

It's really that easy. Because as noted, if we do our part and Trump loses the election, he is fucked. That's really all there is to it.

We are in uncharted territory here because the founding fathers were eighteenth-century Enlightenment rationalists, and while they obviously did not trust a king and built in all kinds of checks and balances to prevent the president from BEING a king, they also imagined that whoever held the job would at least make a good-faith effort to follow the rules. Besides, the best-designed political system in the world would still be vulnerable to someone like Trump, who gleefully and sociopathically wrecks all norms and precedents however he pleases. That's why there isn't technically a law on the books preventing someone in prison from running for president, because the founding fathers were operating under the idea that people in American government would at least try, however badly, to perform the functions of American government. Trump doesn't. He doesn't give a shit about that. He's willing to take the whole country down in flames if it saves him personally from consequences, and while our institutional guardrails (barely) held last time, they've already said that a second Trump term would involve wrecking all of those, because he is a tinpot narcissistic psychopath dictator wannabe. And yes, it's terrifying, and yes, too many people didn't learn from 2016, and all the rest, but still:

If you want to see the fucker go to jail and reap the consequences of his actions, make sure he loses the 2024 election. That's what you need to focus on. Do that, and the rest of it will come after. So yeah.

#anthropicmoose #ask #politics for ts #the giant orange monster

[drdemonprince]

if you ever have the time and space to answer this i'd be very thankful

how can i take any let downs by friends less personal and continue giving people chances/inviting them in and being vulnerable without hurting myself/gettung hurt in the process? i'm guessing the answer is to find a balance, but are there ways to go about it easier? no matter how much i try to communicate and and manage expectations... i appreciate my friends greatly, but still i often feel let down when they cant come to things that are important to me though i understand that things can happen and theres usually reasons for not being able to make something and i am not their priority number one in a system that exhausts all of us- it just keeps happening and i don't want to grow bitter and alone but cherish the people in my life and trust they are trying their best

I think you can start by practicing being more flaky and unreliable and more reliant up on your friends' grace as well! When we feel resentful, it is often a sign that we are doing far too much, and not having our needs cared for. I used to be one of the most reliable mother fuckers around -- it was my senior superlative, actually, Most Reliable! ha! -- and I resented just about everyone for being less put together, less likely to follow through, less prone to doing what they said and saying what they'd do than me. I was a bitter little Type A overachieving cunt who considered myself superior to everyone (in part because my hyper literal Autistic ass believed that if you said you were going to do something, that meant you absolutely Had to Do It and Why Would Anybody Lie about a thing like that?)

Today I am a fuckin MESS and I am a much better person for it. I amble up just barely on time, I cancel plans, I forget things, I tell someone I can't make it even if in the most literal sense I could but I don't feel like it -- and many of my friends are tired, spent, fuzzy brained exhausted messes too! And it's fine! I have some friends that I regularly rely upon to cancel our plans because it frees up a little extra room in my schedule that I always wind up needing. I'm not mad or disappointed in them for bailing, my ass is relieved because I definitely have some shit to get to myself and probably four other people that I'm kinda letting down at the moment. It's not that any of us lack concern for one another, that's just what being a busy adult is in this day and age. We have work and creative pursuits and lots of friends and fucking and exercise and tile to regrout. Shit happens. It's not a big deal if I end up needing to see the movie solo or if we need to reschedule our breakfast date. Shit happens. I have too many actual problems to make a problem out of someone having a hangover and not being able to show up to my birthday or whatever. I missed their birthday last year, but I'll make it there this year, and maybe next time they'll make mine, too. The grace of accepting chaos washes it all away. My friends are my fellow comrades in the fuckin trenches and we each get to make one another's tours a little less miserable by understanding shit's crazy and fucked and that none of it is personal and that at the end, we still love eachother and are doing our best.

With time, may you find that kind of serenity and that ability to just keep on moving in life rather than fixating on the little slights and unpredictable things that will happen whether we fight them or not. Don't read too much into anyone's cancellation of plans or lateness or flakiness. Put your mind toward more interesting problems in your life, ones that some thinking can help solve. Easier said than done, but you'll get there. If my bitter anal retentive ass could become so sloppy and lovingly blase so can you!

[beanghostprincess]

What are you most controversial/unpopular OP opinions??? Sorry if it was answered before

You want me to get canceled so bad-- If I speak-- But idk, I guess I'll say the controversial opinions I can say publicly without a bunch of people coming at me!

Zo$an is a bit... Overrated? And by overrated I mean extremely/annoyingly overrated. I like the ship and its canon dynamic but I think at least 80% of the fandom portrays them in a very mischaracterized way. Not to say that... The ship is literally everywhere and the shippers always look for every little thing to prove they're canon, even if the "proof" has literally nothing to do with them. It's not that I don't enjoy the ship (although I must admit I prefer other dynamics a lot more) I just can't stand shippers that go to extremes. It's funny because I think Zo$an's dynamic is way more interesting and romantic in canon than it will ever be in the fandom. It's a bit sad, ngl. I liked them a lot at first but it got so tiring and now I am pretty exhausted from seeing it everywhere. The people force it to be more than it is when the canon is already pretty fucking great.

Adding to the Zo$san thing. I think that relationship would only work if Luffy is there somehow but it wouldn't last a day without him in the relationship. Unless there's like, a ton of character development most of these people don't make them go through.

One Piece Film Z is my worst enemy. It's such a boring movie. The only good thing is the soundtrack and maybe the suits but God watching that was torture.

Boa hate is uhhhh weird. I mean, I get why the joke about her being in love with Luffy might be annoying, but I think most of you need to learn to understand that Oda's sense of humor is sometimes a bit too exaggerated (and not funny) and it has basically nothing to do with the actual canon dynamics between characters. Boa likes Luffy because he's one of the first men who has ever treated her right, so of course she confuses that feeling with love. And of course, yeah, it isn't canon. Whatever. Just read between the lines, maybe? And also, stop using words like "pedo" to describe her because using that term so lightly about 1) a fictional character and 2) somebody who's clearly not a pedo is fucked up. Lmao. Do you even know what that word means???

Once again complaining about Pudding hate and saying that it's stupid. I won't overanalyze because I always do it with her, but the only reason people hate her is for misogynistic reasons and because they're babying Sanji. Evil male characters are okay and hot and very traumatized but the second it's a woman she's the most evilest person ever! Because God forbid they make mistakes! Suddenly their character development isn't valid because they hurt their babygirl!

Now that we're talking about my dearest Pudding. Not tagging anybody of course, but I saw this post with so many interactions of people agreeing about Sanji considering violence as a sign of love which??? Doesn't make sense at all?? OP said it was because he couldn't tell the difference between love/abuse because of his family, but that's just... Not accurate. That could only happen if they had manipulated him into thinking abuse is a type of love, but he had healthy love growing up. Even when he was with the Vinsmokes (Sora and Reiju, I love you). And yet OP said Sanji considered Pudding's behavior flirting (wrong) and that's why he let her attack him (nope) and that it was proof of Zo$an. And okay, it's not a hugely popular theory, but a lot of people agreed with it and it bothered me a lot because it's both out of character and also using Pudding (complex female character) once again to try and prove the canon of a ship (that doesn't have anything to do with WCI either???). It just bothers me. People can perceive the story however they want but... Y'know.

OPLA isn't that good. Or good at all? I only like it because I like the cast and it's funny seeing my blorbos irl. But the script is simple and dull and just stupid most of the time. The characters are either simplified, mischaracterized, or forgotten. And tbh most of the shots are very awful and could be a lot better. The directing is also nonexistent. It's 6/10 and 3 of those points are because both the Zolu and the cast.

Apparently this is a very common theory about Nami's origins, but, uh, I don't think we need to know? What else do you need to know about her? People say she's a lost princess or something like that as if we didn't have a lost princess already (Sanji ily). Repeating the same plot would be boring and underwhelming, but also? It'd be extremely useless for the plot and it'd go against everything about Nami's story and the way Luffy reacts to it.

Luffy isn't canon aroace. In fact, the reasoning people use for him being "coded" is the same Oda uses for Zoro too and Zoro is almost never portrayed as the "idiot who doesn't know what sex is" the way Luffy often is. If you're calling Luffy canon aroace for what Oda said about him being focused on adventures, the same goes for Zoro being focused on his dream. They could be coded arospec but there's nothing confirmed and the constant discourse about it is stupid. Attacking others because of their ships just because you don't agree with them and saying it's wrong using our identity to do it is very fucked up. Especially since most of the time people complaining aren't even aroace. The only reason people do it (attacking others saying they can't ship Luffy and that it's "weird" and "wrong") is that they infantilize Luffy/Don't want him getting in between their ships (<- aroace person writing this) (also, it's very ableist since people agree on Luffy also being neurodivergent coded and treating him like a kid bc of that but this isn't about that now).

Somehow this is very common. Some fucking how. I can't believe I have to say this. I'm tired of people blaming Usopp for what happened in Water 7. Or in general hating Usopp. Actually, he's one of the best-written characters in the whole show and he's so underappreciated it's so frustrating.

Sanji's perv jokes are annoying af and we all know that, but people who hate the character and consider him a red flag for that are missing the point completely. The point being "Oda exaggerates jokes to an annoying extent and most of the time they don't even reflect the character". I understand they can make you uncomfortable (same here tbh) but reducing Sanji to only those jokes is a waste of his character. You need to take jokes less seriously.

If I see one of these "red flag OP boys" TikToks adding Law/Ace/Zoro/Sanji next to fucking Doffy I will riot. Also, stop adding Crocodile there. He's a mafioso, there's NO way he won't be a sweetheart to his lover.

Baron Omatsuri's artstyle and animation is amazing and it fits the plot and aesthetic of the movie perfectly and people saying it's ugly will forever bother me.

"Usopp is suddenly hot after timeskip!" He has always been hot what the fuck are you talking about.

People reduce Nami to her "mean"/"sarcastic" personality a lot when she's quite literally one of the most kind-hearted characters of all. That being said, morally speaking she's probably one of the worst. I could explain how that works but I don't want to do it now, the point is-- Let the girl be sweet instead of making her mean all the time. And also, let her be mean and selfish without making it her entire personality. There's something called "balance".

Film Red was kind of bad. Like, the songs are amazing (thanks, Ado) but the ending is awful and the plot is very meh. I'm only here for Uta and Shanks but the rest of the characters are just useless. I do appreciate Sanji's hair in the movie, though.

#i am aware that most of these aren't that unpopular and i think i've just been on tiktok too much #some of my opinions should stay hidden from the world i don't want to make people angry lmao #anyway here it is hope you like my hot takes hidden in between mild takes #one piece

[trickstarbrave]

this is not proofread. and i am half awake

but i have FINALLY finished the fucking. nerevoryn omegaverse au fic. no one else has written it yet, so i will be the one to bear the burden. i will commit the first sin and take all the stones you throw.

sorry that this is mostly not even smut, just me messing around with worldbuilding. i have worldbuilder's disease. i have even MORE thoughts about this setting i have inevitably left out. but. well. they fuck in the end okay

special shout out my mutual who posted an omegaverse tweet bc i was really blanking on the smut for some reason. i couldnt get it working right???? like it wasn't interesting. but we got there with the help of the tweet.

content warnings: standard omegaverse shit. heats, ruts, biting, impregnation kink, knots, you get it. omegas have vaginas as far as im concerned bc it just makes more sense to me. give it a shot as i have played with stereotypes and tried to make it interesting i hope

There were, despite the stereotypes, perks when it came to being an omega. In fact, in a way, stereotypes could be one of the perks, if you played your cards right. And if there was anything Nerevar knew how to do, it was use anything and everything to his advantage. 

There was a common belief omegas were all delicate, gentle hearted peace-keepers--or worse, treasures that lay in wait for some big strong alpha to come take them. It wasn’t like there were no docile, delicate omegas, but Nerevar was certainly not the type. He could make peace all right--with persuasion and his blade however, not rolling over with his belly up begging everyone to stop fighting. 

Most people thought he was an alpha given how headstrong he was and how quickly he took charge of situations. That, or he was an alpha-leaning beta given he was usually able to keep his cool in difficult situations, especially around alphas acting territorial and puffing out their chests. Nerevar never bothered correcting them either way; sure, he could turn himself into some moral champion of omegas and prove they could be just as capable politicians and warriors, but the more likely outcome was everyone he told would take him significantly less seriously. And that would mean more heads would have to roll and well, Nerevar didn’t like cleaning up messes. 

He still had heats, having to retreat into his room for days at a time, but no one said anything. Just as easily he could be locked away in a rut, or praying to Azura for several days on end. No one dared question him, and only the most trustworthy attendants were allowed anywhere near his room to be able to smell the difference. 

On the plus side, Nerevar had many things he used to his advantage; in all honesty, the fact people thought Nerevar was a beta wasn’t unfounded. Even when an alpha went into a rut, he was mostly unbothered by it. A bit of discomfort, not to mention he needed a long bath afterwards to get the smell off him, but unlike some omegas where the scent of an alpha in rut had them going into heat right away, Nerevar seemed mostly unaffected and could force the instinct down. And, through careful control of his mental state, he could usually calm most alphas down without them being the wiser about Nerevar’s secondary sex and wanting to take him for themselves. His seeming immunity from an alpha in rut was often the subject of multiple jokes by Almalexia, as the two of them would mostly sit around, having a few drinks in the quiet of her room. Well, that was until she took Vivec as her mate, then most of her ruts were spent with the warrior-poet instead. 

Hence why, when his meeting with Voryn had been canceled last minute after he already made his way to Kogoruhn, he simply strolled to Voryn’s room, humming casually with a couple books and food for the other. 

Much like Nerevar, Voryn was also an… Interesting example of an alpha. Voryn was usually pegged more so as a beta based on his behavior, until you got a whiff of pheromones when you pissed him off. He wasn’t as outwardly aggressive and territorial as far as most people were concerned, but Nerevar knew him well. He disguised it as dedication and love for his house, or loyalty to those close to him, but he was indeed territorial. And instead of outward aggression, picking fights and throwing fists, he preferred to temper his aggression and instead attack them when they least expected it. He may look like he forgives and forgets, but in truth he was a viper laying in wait to strike. 

Nerevar knocked, careful not to drop the few books tucked under his arm, hearing the low growl that followed. 

“Out.” Voryn hissed, and Nerevar bit back a laugh.

“It’s me,” Nerevar clarified. “I brought you some books and some food. Servants said you haven’t eaten since yesterday.” Voryn, unlike his typically cool demeanor, was vicious and snippy in a rut. Since Nerevar grew up alongside him, he knew it very well, getting chased away from Voryn’s door every time. Well, that and the servants and other members of House Dagoth would shoo him away, warning him not to go near. It was customary to keep young alphas and omegas apart during heats and ruts respectively, for good reason. No one wanted any injured teenagers or anyone carrying children way too young. But Nerevar could still see it in the aftermath—scratch marks and bruises on Gilvoth after he came to force his younger brother to eat, broken furniture, a smashed window at one point—luckily he calmed down from physical violence as he got older. If he hadn’t, he doubted Kogoruhn would still be standing with all the magic the lord knew. 

“All the more reason to tell you to leave.” Voryn huffed. 

“You know ruts don’t bother me.” Nerevar snarked. “Hurry up and open the door before I drop your food.” 

After some groaning and growling, eventually Voryn did open the door, to which Nerevar quickly darted inside before he could take the tray and shove him out. 

“You are an idiot.” Voryn groaned as Nerevar set the tray of food on the desk, before tossing the books onto Voryn’s bed. “But that’s nothing new anymore.” 

“I told you, ruts don’t bother me.” Nerevar chuckled, trying to ignore the heavy feeling in the air as always. At the very least, Voryn’s scent wasn’t offensive; some alphas made him feel disgusting, if not a little nauseous. Voryn’s was much more familiar and a lot more welcomed, given he was used to it in much smaller quantities over the years. In fact, it was kind of nice; warm, a bit spicy, and nostalgic. 

“I can’t help but fear you’re just playing with fire when you say things like that.” Voryn sighed, before plopping himself on the bed. He was dressed very loosely, no doubt feeling hot and antsy. Nerevar, unbothered, also sat beside him with a grin on his face. 

“Come on, I’m not being that reckless.” 

“You’re tempting fate, that’s what you’re doing.” Voryn huffed. “But you’ve always been like that, haven’t you? Always pushing your luck to its limits until it blows up in your face.” 

“It hasn’t blown up in my face yet,” Nerevar asserted proudly. “Unlike several of Sil’s little inventions.” Voryn rolled his eyes at that.

“Because you’re constantly poking and prodding at them even when he specifically told you not to, that’s why.” Nerevar, seeing as Voryn was making a good point, instead side-stepped it entirely.

“Come on, you know you get lonely during a rut,” Nerevar instead circled the conversation back around. “Bored, stir crazy, antsy…”

“That’s the nature of a rut so I don’t rip someone to pieces.” Voryn huffed. “I’m not supposed to be relaxing and having fun but defending my territory and looking for a mate as far as my instincts are concerned.” 

“Mm…” Nerevar hummed. “I heard mate does make them easier. At least, as far as Ayem told me.” Nerevar hadn’t minded his wife taking a mate that wasn’t him; in terms of sexual compatibility, Nerevar didn’t find her very appealing. Not that she was ugly or anything--far from it! She was very beautiful, tall, strong… All things an omega should be dying to have in a mate. But there was something about her scent that put him off from ever wanting to mate. Just as well, she didn’t find his scent all that appealing either, and most political marriages didn’t end in mating even in the case of alpha and omega couples. 

“And I am in no mood to tear apart Vvardenfell looking for one.” Voryn scoffed, before laying down on his side. Despite doing so, however, he didn’t look comfortable in the slightest. All of his muscles were tense as he laid there, stiff as a corpse. “I have things to be doing, research to do, meetings to be had--”

“Shh…” Nerevar hushed him, scooting closer to rub his back. At the touch Voryn snarled, before slowly he began relaxing, bit by bit. “There…” Nerevar smiled fondly. “You’ll have time for all of that when this is over. It’s only a couple of days right?” Nerevar asked, before working at a knot on Voryn’s shoulder. “Roll over and I’ll rub your back. You’re way too tense.”

Despite all his huffing and snarling, Voryn did roll over, face planted in a pillow, allowing Nerevar climb on top of him to massage him. For most alphas having an omega crawling on top of them in the middle of a rut like this was no doubt humiliating, but Voryn had in fact relaxed gradually. The scent in the air turned from one of hostility and warning to more of a gentle warmth as Nerevar continued to work knot after knot out of his back. 

“What research are you working on now?” Nerevar asked, hoping some light conversation would help relax him further. 

“Mm…” Voryn groaned softly, fingers clenching and unclenching the blankets under him. “Dwemeri explosive powder…”

“Making it?” Nerevar asked, raising a brow. 

“No,” Voryn clarified. “Dwemer machinery is required to actually… Make it.” He hummed softly as Nerevar rubbed at his lower back, working the especially tense muscles nice and slow. “Machinery far too large and complicated to fit into Kogoruhn.”

“What about it then?”

“Dwarven oil has a number of alchemical properties…” Voryn continued. “I was hoping to test if their explosive powder had any as well.” 

“Without blowing up half of your stronghold, I hope?” At that, Voryn snorted, before rolling over and forcing Nerevar off him now that he was much more relaxed. With a grin, Voryn tugged Nerevar down to be laying beside him.

“Unlike you, I don’t have a track record for blowing things up unintentionally.” 

“You’re back on that again?” Nerevar groaned, offended but still laughing. 

“I’m not the one who brought it up the first time.” Voryn smirked. “Though tell me, how many times has Dumac saved you from nearly stepping on a landmine again?” 

“You’re being an asshole right now, you know that?” Nerevar shot him a playful glare. 

“Well you’re an asshole all the time and it’s never stopped you.” 

And just like that, the two were at it. Was wrestling an alpha in rut a good idea? Not in the slightest. However, the two used to playfully wrestle all the time as children and even teenagers, so it was… Oddly nice to do so again as adults. Typically Nerevar would win due to raw strength alone--and he could right now, of course--but he knew it was probably a terrible idea to piss an alpha off like that in the middle of a rut. So instead, Nerevar just put up a gentle fight, knocking several of the pillows and blankets off the plush bed, along with the books Nerevar brought earlier, all the while laughing. Then, once he felt Voryn was starting to get a bit too aggressive and his movements too hurried, he let the other pin him to the bed. 

“Gods…” Nerevar laughed, breathlessly. “How long has it been since we wrestled like this?”

“Decades.” Voryn replied, equally as breathless. “Mm… But oddly nice to get the energy out.” 

“I told you.” Nerevar grinned. “Nice to move around, get your mind off things… Sitting there stewing in it only makes it worse.” 

“Don’t tell me you go around wrestling people in heat.” Nerevar nearly choked in laughter at that. 

“No!” He had to roll over onto his side, holding his stomach from giggling. “Gods, fuck no! Azura’s mercy, I’m not that insane!” Another few chuckles followed as he tried to compose himself. “I can barely stand anyone touching me once it settles in. Everything feels so… Sharp and uncomfortable.” 

“Does it?” Voryn raised an eyebrow, but climbed off Nerevar to flop down beside him. “That sounds… Unusual.”

Nerevar shrugged. “It’s always been like that.” He admitted as though it were nothing. “You wouldn’t it get it being an alpha, I guess.” 

“Nerevar, I may not be an omega but that doesn’t mean I’m uneducated.” Voryn was oddly stern now, concerned. “Just like how you aren’t an alpha but understand how a rut works.” 

“Look, what do you want me to say?” Nerevar asked. “No healer has ever told me anything is wrong with me. It just seemed the more time that went on, the more… Painful they got?” Nerevar groaned. “Well, not really painful, I’ve found a way around it for the most part--”

“So you’re coping with it like a poorly healed injury.” 

“No!” Nerevar asserted. “It’s not an injury but a normal thing.”

“A normal process that isn’t acting as normal.” 

“Look,” Nerevar rolled his eyes, “You can bother the healers back at the palace about it if you’re so concerned. But I’ve adjusted just fine to my heats. I lay in bed, have all my food ready, stacks of books and what have you, and I deal with it.” Nerevar gave him a playful kick. “Unlike someone who went a whole day without eating.” 

Voryn rolled his eyes, getting up from the bed. “Fine fine, I’ll eat lord Nerevar.” Voryn replied, sarcastically. He then went over to his desk, finally eating the meal Nerevar brought him. 

While he ate, they still chatted and talked, Nerevar laying casually on his bed. It hadn’t been the first time he’d done it, and Nerevar expected it wouldn’t be the last with their close friendship. Even as councilman and king, Nerevar saw them as close friends above all else. The closest friend he had, honestly. 

Yet, as he laid there he found himself feeling… Uncomfortable. The air wasn’t stifling after Voryn calmed down, but Nerevar’s clothes felt… Itchy. Not to mention he was starting to feel feverish. Maybe that wrestling wasn’t a good idea if he was coming down with something, but he didn’t want to leave yet--he was mid conversation, after all, and it seemed like Voryn was still relaxing more and more. But, it wasn’t long until Nerevar was tossing and turning on the bed, trying to feel comfortable. Despite being fully dressed he got that same paranoid feeling he had being out in the open on the battlefield: antsy and exposed. 

“Are you alright?” Voryn had finished by now, coming to the bed to look at him.

“Yeah just--” Nerevar sighed. “Uncomfortable.” Then, realizing how that might be interpreted, tried to cover for it. “Not that your bed is uncomfortable, I just feel… Off, all of a sudden.” 

“How so?”

“My clothes feel itchy--” Nerevar was already scratching at his arms, writhing slightly to try and itch at his back. “It’s not flees, I just bathed… Not to mention it’s not like, bug bite itchy but like my clothes are way too rough…” 

“Stress?” Voryn asked, looking at his arms to ensure he didn’t have a rash. “I could always look at your clothes to be sure.” 

“Not a bad idea.” Nerevar began pulling his shirt up over his head to hand to Voryn who combed it over. Sure enough, the clean cloth had no parasites or bugs crawling around in it, but already Nerevar felt relieved. He kicked off his trousers while he was at it, left only in his undergarments and much more comfortable. 

“Well the fabric is particularly rough.” Voryn remarked. “Thick material, more so used for keeping warm and dry rather than relaxing. Rolling around wrestling in it probably irritated your skin.” Nerevar snorted at that, especially as Voryn tossed one of his own silk robes on top of him. He used to have no problem wrestling in the ash and dust, but now slightly rough fabric was what was going to do him in? Although… The silk robe was a lot more comfortable, the soft fabric almost soothing his skin as he curled up with it on and tied shut, breathing deeply. Voryn’s sheets were also nice and soft… 

“You are also feeling warm though…” Voryn brought the back of his hand to Nerevar’s forehead. “Not to mention I actually beat you at wrestling…” He looked concerned, “You weren’t mucking around the bitter coast again were you? Swamp fever has been on the rise there, and I know how much you love mudcrab hunting more than your own good--” Nerevar rolled his eyes.

“I came straight here from the propylon chamber, Voryn.” He did wear weather appropriate clothes given it was the cold and rainy season in northern VVardenfell, but that was just a precaution. “I wasn’t running around the bitter coast catching mudcrabs, I can assure you.” 

“Here,” Voryn stood up now, pulling the pillows and blankets back on the bed to make Nerevar more comfortable. “Why don’t you just lay down for a few minutes and see if it goes down. If not, I have a cure disease potion around here somewhere…” He then got up after piling them all back on, rummaging through his shelves stocked with an astounding amount of alchemical books, ingredient chests, and potion bottles. ‘Controlled chaos’ as Voryn would say, though Nerevar could never make sense of it. But right now he was more than content to just lay there in the pile of pillows and blankets, breathing in nice and deep as his body started to go from uncomfortably hot to warm and fuzzy. 

“I found it,” Voryn kneeled beside him, beckoning Nerevar to sit up properly. He groaned in annoyance; he just got fucking comfortable, now Voryn wanted him to sit up? But one look at Voryn’s eyes told Nerevar it was just for his own good, so reluctantly and without much fuss he sat up slightly, letting Voryn tilt his head and press the potion bottle to his lips. It briefly occurred to him he could drink it himself but… Well, Voryn was just being a loyal retainer and friend right? Ever loyal, doting Voryn.. Nerevar found that trait of his kind of endearing. 

“Normally when I have to give you medicine you make such a fuss,” Voryn smiled softly, “You’re being a good boy right now, I see.” At the ‘good boy’ comment Nerevar’s breath hitched slightly as he sunk back onto the bed to lay on his side, Voryn piling more of the blankets and pillows around him so he was comfortable. Then, a hand threaded into his hair, rubbing at his scalp just like Nerevar liked, making him positively melt, mewling and moaning softly in pure delight. 

“That’s it…” Voryn purred, “Such a good boy, aren’t you…?” Voryn then laid down behind him, nuzzling against him, his hands brushing across Nerevar’s chest and stomach in soft strokes… 

Ah, Voryn was scenting him, something that wasn’t unwelcomed in the slightest. It was nice; being wrapped up in that warm, musky scent was only making him feel better. People would be able to smell Voryn on him after all, all over his body from his clothes to his hair and skin… Then again, he felt like he never wanted to leave the comfort of Voryn’s bed right now. He was content to just lay there being tended to, Voryn nuzzling him, feeding him, guarding him… 

“Oh Neht,” Voryn buried his face in Nerevar’s neck, breathing in his scent directly, before his tongue swiped at a scent gland. That caught Nerevar’s attention, making him moan louder, squirming in Voryn’s arms. 

“Hey--” Nerevar protested weakly. His mind felt fuzzy, but he knew that was crossing a line at least. “Watch it.” 

“You smell divine…” Voryn purred. “Nice and sweet…” He resumed the licking, leaving Nerevar whining softly, his hips moving in small circles until Voryn pressed his hips firmly against Nerevar’s ass, holding him still with a growl. His cunt throbbed at that, suddenly overcome with the realization he was empty right now, so fucking empty--he needed something in him. Right now. Fingers, a toy, a cock, just something filling him up--

Then, Voryn was pulling back suddenly, jerking his hands away as though he was burned. Nerevar looked up at him confused and dazed, Voryn’s face flushed red. 

“You’re in heat.” Voryn murmured, suddenly realizing what was going on. Nerevar, however, took a few moments to process his words, before anxiety bubbled up inside him.

“No I’m not--” He wasn’t the type to go into heat smelling an alpha in rut. He had never done so before, and he wasn’t due for his heat for a few months anyways. Besides, when he was in heat he was nesting and--

Nerevar glanced at the pillows and blankets Voryn had put around him, realizing when he had done so Nerevar felt much more secure and comfortable. He’d been antsy before, paranoid and feeling exposed until the soft, plush walls were around him. He also felt more sensitive to his clothes, feeling warm and aroused-- 

“I-I hate people touching me in heat,” Nerevar tried to explain quickly, sitting up and panicked. “I can’t be…” That was right, he couldn’t be. He hated being touched during his heat, growling and hissing as the touch was physically painful. But Voryn touching him hadn’t hurt at all, it felt…

Nerevar’s hands were trembling as he got up quickly, tugging the robe shut firmly and making sure the tie was secure, before he took off running for the propylon chamber. He wasn’t thinking clearly, he just knew he needed to not be there anymore. Something was wrong with him after all; very, very wrong with him. He paid no mind to Voryn calling after him, even as his anxiety spiked hearing the concern and anger in his voice; he just kept running through the halls, sprinting past servants and attendants until he made it to the chamber, giving quick orders to send him to Mournhold before he was teleported away. 

At the palace, Nerevar didn’t stop to catch his breath either. The air felt cold and stifling as he continued running, spriting like a mad man until he made it to his room where he swiftly locked the door. He drew the curtains, blocking out the light until it was dark, his anxiety still not ceasing. He tripped on a chair in his scramble, swearing up a storm as he kicked and snarled, breaking a leg off the chair. He then grabbed it as he stood, throwing it to the wall resulting in the wood splintering against the heavy stone and knocking several tapestries down. Now in darkness he retreated to his bed, trying to curl up to find comfort.

His bed felt wrong. Wrong, disgusting, cold, uncomfortable… Even as he moved the blankets and pillows he just felt worse. None of them were as comfortable as Voryn’s bed, covered in his scent…

Nerevar tugged the robe off, burying his face in it, whining softly. The scent, despite being musky and strong, was so comforting. He never used to find an alpha’s scent so soothing before, why now? Even when he was in heat he’d growl if any alpha even so much as came near his room, so why this? Why now?!

A few servants knocked on the door, calling for him alarmed. Then a few healers. He didn’t respond to any of them, laying there in silence, too ashamed to even tell them to leave. It felt like his skin was crawling, and he simultaneously felt both hyper-aggressive and like he had no strength in him. Then it was Almalexia, knocking.

“Nerevar?!” He growled weakly; he didn’t want anyone to see him, let alone a different alpha--no, he needed to get rid of that mindset. Voryn wasn’t special, at least, not as an alpha. Voryn was his closest friend yet, but if he didn’t want to be seen by anyone, that meant anyone. Especially not Voryn, an alpha in rut, when he was obviously in heat. 

“Are you injured?” She asked. “What happened in Kogoruhn--” A few more people spoke quietly to her, their voices too hushed for him to hear. In the back of his mind, he knew it was only logical she’d ask; he did come sprinting through the palace in one of Voryn’s robes, running like a pack of nix-hounds were trying to kill him. What was supposed to be a political meeting ending in such a sight would be a great cause of concern--one Nerevar should smooth over before anyone marched to Kogoruhn accusing Voryn of treason. But he didn’t have the energy to do so; all he wanted to do was curl up and forget the rest of the world entirely. 

“Nerevar,” It was Vivec now, knocking at his door, voice level and a bit softer than how he usually spoke, “The healers are here, will you let them in?”

“I don’t need to see a healer.” He growled, enraged. It was stupid; Nerevar knew something was wrong with his body, but the idea of being seen by a bunch of strangers right now poking and prodding at him felt like a fate worse than death.

“Voryn is here.” A sensation ran straight through Nerevar he didn’t have a proper name for. Anticipation? Anxiety? Want? It was impossible to place, but it made him feel restless. “Would you prefer to see him?”

“No!” Nerevar suddenly snapped, his voice much louder than it had to be. He was terrified of what would happen if he saw Voryn again right now. Part of him wanted to, deep down; he wasn’t this restless and anxious simply laying in Voryn’s bed. In fact he felt nice--warm and fuzzy and safe. But he didn’t know what was going on, or what would happen if he followed that thread of desire to the end.

“Did Voryn hurt you?” Vivec asked, trying to get answers. 

“He didn’t hurt me--” Nerevar snapped at that as well. Voryn would never hurt Nerevar. He knew that much. His whole body was screaming, suddenly offended at even the idea. Voryn had been trying so hard to take care of Nerevar, made sure he was comfortable, fed him medicine and even made a nest for him… A wave of heat washed over him quickly at the memory, followed by a spike in anxiety. “I just--I don’t know what’s going on!” 

A few moments of silence followed, before Vivec sighed. “Let me come in.” That seemed less risky than healers he hardly knew or an alpha. Nerevar’s brain, as was so common while in heat, was in survival mode after all, constantly looking out for any potential threat. But Vivec was another omega, and a bonded one at that. Someone close to him and trusted.

After Nerevar gave a quiet answer, Vivec unlocked the door with a spell, slipping inside and then shutting and locking the door behind him. He approached the bed slowly, not sitting on it or touching him. 

“Tell me what happened and I’ll tell the others.” His voice was quiet, knowing just how jumpy and aggressive an omega could get in this state.

“I…” Nerevar swallowed. He didn’t want to recount it, embarrassed now that his luck had in fact run out just like Voryn said it might. “Ruts don’t usually trigger heat in me.” Nerevar said, his voice wavering.

“I’m aware.” 

“But it was…” Nerevar gave a shaky sigh. “I don’t… Know what happened. My body just started… Going into heat all of a sudden while I was laying on his bed, without me even realizing it.” Normally he could tell the warning signs of an impending heat: irritability, hunger, defensiveness, physical discomfort, even a sensitivity to light. “I also hate being touched when I’m in heat, it fucking hurts,” He hissed softly, remembering the warm, welcomed touch of Voryn’s hands on him as the other scented him. His skin burned despite no one touching him at the moment, and he wanted the relief of Voryn once again. Vivec still raised an eyebrow at that. “It always does but then I… It didn’t hurt when he was touching me. It felt… Nice. Relaxing.” Vivec hummed contemplatively at that. 

“When he realized I was… Going into heat he pulled away. And I realized it too and panicked and ran back here.” He did regret making a scene but he didn’t know what else he was supposed to do. 

“I’ll speak with the healers.” The most they’d be able to do was a suppressant, but at this point Nerevar would take it. He wanted this feeling to stop. Desperately. 

“Nerevar?!” He heard Voryn’s voice outside the door. “Nerevar, are you alright?” The concern in his voice had Nerevar’s heart racing, but he was still anxious about what would happen if he saw Voryn again. The sensation he was losing control was terrifying, after all. 

“I think it would be best you see him, Neht.” Vivec said simply, moving towards the door. “He’s going to tear the palace apart trying to get to you.” Nerevar’s anxiety only grew at that; what if Voryn got hurt? What if people assumed the worst? Not to mention it was only making the other, strange feelings inside him grow all the more strong at the notion Voryn desperately needed him.

“L…” He hesitated, before he tugged the robe out from under him and back onto his body to make himself decent. “Let him in.” 

As soon as the door was opened, Voryn shoved his way past the guards and Vivec into the room, Vivec retreating outside once more to hush the angered guards, attendants, and healers who wanted to drag him back out. 

“Neht,” Voryn’s voice went hushed as he quickly made his way to the bed, climbing on without a care. Nerevar had half a mind to snap at him, before Voryn was stroking at his skin and scenting him again. He felt himself melting already from the familiar scent filling the room, along with the soothing touch on his skin. “Thank gods you’re alright.” The room still felt wrong, but he felt a hell of a lot better being tended to like this, the burning under his skin slowly fading. 

“Voryn…” He murmured, closing his eyes. He tried to will himself to feel more comfortable; he was in his room, the same place he always was for all of his heats. Maybe it was because there were people outside his door? It was possible; he hated being bothered when he was in heat. 

Then the door opened after a few, pleasant moments, Voryn growling with pure rage. The healer who entered was an older beta woman, but even she shuddered. 

“I mean his majesty no harm.” It was a healer he saw many times in the past. She then glanced at Nerevar in the dim lighting. “I know what happened, Lord Nerevar.” 

Nerevar sat up at that, eager for answers, but Voryn kept an arm wrapped around his waist securely. 

“... In all honesty,” The healer began, sounding exacerbated, “I have never seen a case like this in all my years. But there is only one answer I can come to based on everything else.”

“Go on.” Nerevar tried to keep his voice level rather than annoyed. Azura knows how terrified most people got when he was angry. 

The healer pinched the bridge of her nose. 

“How familiar are you with fated mates?” At her question, Nerevar froze, stunned, before he gave a loud bark of laughter. The healer, however, did not laugh or smile back, and instead only looked more resolute. 

“... Be serious with me.” 

“I am being serious, Lord Nerevar.” 

“Are you--are you seriously trying to say Voryn is my--”

“I understand how strange it sounds at first.” The healer cut him off. “Typically when someone meets their fated mate they determine it quickly. It only takes a few heat or rut cycles before the draw is undeniable.” She sighed once again. “I can only assume because you knew Lord Dagoth before either of you presented, the draw was less noticeable.” 

It kind of made sense, to a degree. When people wrote about fated mates it was usually that they had a scent that was undeniable. Even passing by them on the street, you couldn’t get the scent out of your head for days on end, trying to find it again and again. Even those who tried to deny it couldn’t refuse the pull forever; heats and ruts were unbearable, the longing overwhelming the pair. No one had ever recorded an account of a fated pair who knew each other prior to presenting though; fated mates were absurdly rare, after all. They were more common in fiction than real life, and only the most hopeless of romantics ever went out actually looking for one. Most people just found a mate they liked rather than chase after some destined person, and why fated mates even existed was a mystery. Did everyone have one but distance kept them from finding one? That didn’t seem likely; the most common belief was that some people were born with them--not many members of the population, anyways--and even fewer actually found their ‘other half’. Someone meeting a fated mate before presenting, when you were children not off exploring the wider world yet, was even more unlikely. 

Dumac told him the dwemer scholars believed it had something to do with ‘reproductive compatibility’. Not that it was a mystical, god given connection like some believed, but rather those with a fated partner were less compatible with most of the population, so when they did find someone they could produce children with easily, the desire to mate was enhanced strongly. Nerevar didn’t know if he liked that explanation either though. He found the ideas the gods made destined partners to love each other forever as too romantic of an idea for reality yes, but presuming there must be something wrong with them instead wasn’t much better. 

It didn’t seem likely that he and Voryn could just ignore the draw for decades though, right? Surely that wouldn’t be possible. The draw was supposed to be strong, impossible to deny past a certain point.

Sure, when he was younger and Voryn was in a rut he always came by to check on him before he was shooed away, but that was just boredom. And when he was in heat Voryn would pass him notes under the door from time to time that he’d bury in the nests he made, but that was just because being in heat made him feel sensitive and sappy. Nothing more. And shouldn’t there be something more if they were a fated pair?

“Your other symptoms make me more certain of it.” The healer continued, pulling him from his thoughts.

“How so?” Nerevar raised an eyebrow. 

“It isn’t healthy for an unmated omega to be around an alpha in rut.” She replied, a fact that always made Nerevar roll his eyes. “It causes excess stress, even if it doesn’t trigger a heat. Unless you are drawn to the alpha in question as a potential partner, usually a rut is off putting, distressing, or nauseating for an unmated omega.”

“They’ve never bothered me to that extent.” Nerevar snarked.

“Precisely.” She locked eyes with him. “You handle it more akin to an omega who’s already been mated, despite not having the scent of one.” Nerevar tensed at that. He hadn’t thought of it like that in the slightest; why would he? He wasn’t mated. Anyone could smell on him that he wasn’t. “Those who have met a fated partner experience mated behaviors before the bond is even set. Rejecting other suitors, unbothered by others in a heat or rut,” She sighed. “Lord Vivec even explained you were giving off the same scent as a bonded omega whose mate was absent.” Nerevar’s cheeks flushed at that. 

“That’s--” Nerevar tensed slightly, “I wouldn’t go that far.” Surely Nerevar wasn’t. He wasn’t fucking bonded, why would he be throwing out the same scent as an omega who went into heat, begging for their mate to come tend to them? 

“You were.” She asserted, though she did have some sympathy in her gaze at least. “Unfortunately, the best I can do is, if you truly don’t want the bond, I can give you suppressants. They won’t actively stop it right now given you already went into heat, but they should calm some of the worst side effects for a time.” Nerevar already knew what she was going to say next though. “But your next one will be much the same. The side effects will continue to worsen.” Short of running away to the other side of the continent and burning anything he owned that Voryn had ever so much as touched, he would be able to smell Voryn faintly, after all. In the palace, on his belongings, anywhere Voryn had been might trigger the worst of the symptoms all over again now that he had a heat triggered by his rut no doubt. 

“At the very least, Lord Dagoth is in control of his emotions.” Voryn’s brow twitched at that, his arms tightening. “You can spend ruts and heats together without actually mating, until you come to a decision on how to proceed. It should alleviate both of your struggles.” 

Shit, Nerevar hadn’t even considered what Voryn must be going through. Was his irritation and lack of eating because he subconsciously knew Nerevar was supposed to be his mate but wasn’t there by his side? When he was younger was that out of character, violent rage because he knew, right there in the stronghold, his mate was being kept from him? No doubt the next rut Voryn would be uncontrollable; before he could hold back because he wasn’t consciously aware of what he wanted, but now that he knew it was Nerevar… 

Nerevar felt himself getting all the more wet at the prospect of Voryn tearing his way across the country for him, earning a low growl from Voryn and the healer clearing her throat. 

“I’ll leave the two of you to discuss it.” She said, now turning to leave. Nerevar felt his cheeks flush in a rush of embarrassment; no doubt because he was in heat the arousal led to a surge of pheromones in the air all but begging for Voryn to fuck him. “We will be waiting outside for your answer.” 

As soon as the door shut, Voryn was fussing over him again, marking him with his scent by nuzzling into his hair and against his cheek. But quickly the tension was melting off of Voryn’s body as he began apologizing. 

“I’m so sorry, Neht.” 

“This isn’t your fault.” Nerevar huffed. “I’m the idiot who deliberately stuck around after you told me not to.” 

“You didn’t know either.” Voryn sighed. “I could have made you leave but I… I felt more comfortable with you there.” If it was anything like what Nerevar was going through he could understand it. “Besides… If what the healer said is true then this was bound to happen.” That was also true; it was a miracle it hadn’t happened until now. If it wasn’t Nerevar insisting on spending time with Voryn during a rut, it could just as easily be Voryn stumbling upon him in heat, or anything else really. 

“Do you want to take the suppressants?” Voryn asked, and Nerevar sighed, shaking his head.

“No,” He rubbed his eyes, feeling sluggishness settle into his body. “It’ll help only temporarily, and make it worse next time around.” 

“But they might help you think clearer.” Voryn countered. “I don’t want you making any decisions with a clouded head.” 

“I’m not completely out of it, Voryn. A bit anxious, yes, but it’s not like I’m drunk.” Nerevar hated those kinds of assumptions; the stereotype that omegas were just needy, pathetic little things that couldn’t think for themselves once they were in heat was the most infuriating one. 

At his anger though, Voryn hushed him, nuzzling into his neck apologetically and licking a scent gland. Nerevar huffed at first, still rigid, until the affection soothed him, now groaning softly in delight instead as he head fell to the side to give Voryn more room. 

“Then,” Voryn began, “Would you prefer to stay here?” His hand rubbed soothing circles on Nerevar’s lower stomach. “Or do you want to return to my room?”

“Mm…” Nerevar knew it would probably be easier if he stayed here; he had healers and attendants he was used to, not to mention he knew the layout of his room well and kept it stocked with toys, erotica, anything he needed to help him get off. Even if the two of them only went so far as masturbating together rather than mating, those would be helpful. 

But the room didn’t feel entirely comfortable, even with Voryn there. Damn hormones were likely acting up on that front, but no use arguing with something illogical. 

“Your room is probably better.” He admitted, pulling himself out of Voryn’s arms to start packing. “Let me just get a few things and we can head back. Hopefully without the whole damn palace gossiping about it…”

“It’ll be alright.” Voryn reassured him, rubbing his back gently. “The palace was mostly quiet today.” He then coughed awkwardly, “Before I… Came running through after you.” Nerevar snorted at that. “After how thoroughly I scented you though I doubt most will be able to tell what’s going on.”

“Hopefully.” Nerevar wasn’t keeping it a secret he was an omega exactly, but he didn’t want to go shouting it to the world either. It was better to keep people guessing rather than anyone giving him shit for it unnecessarily. He still grabbed his travel pack, carelessly shoving some comfortable clothes and sleeping robes in, along with a few changes of underwear, and a favorite pillow of his. He also managed to cram in a few toys and a steamy novel he enjoyed, able to smell the spike of Voryn’s arousal at the sight from how strong his pheromones were. 

Another trip through the propylon chamber later--this time less hurried and better dressed, and they were once again walking back to Voryn’s private chambers. On the way there Voryn ordered attendants as they went, requesting a large dinner to be brought to his room that evening for Nerevar too, as well that Nerevar would be staying in Kogoruhn for several days. It didn’t take a genius to figure out Nerevar was going to be spending Voryn’s rut with him, the servants all scrambling at the knowledge. 

Just before they reached the room another healer appeared, handing Voryn several vials of potions, before giving a respectful bow and leaving. Voryn’s cheeks were more red at that, but he took them regardless, letting Nerevar enter the room. 

It was mostly as he left it, albeit with a few blankets and pillows knocked off from his speedy exit and a few tapestries fallen off the wall from a door slamming. A wardrobe was left open, probably from Voryn’s scramble to make himself semi-decent before chasing after Nerevar. 

He tossed his bag to the side of the bed, already feeling relieved to be back. Voryn locked the door behind them, moving to draw the curtains shut as Nerevar began fussing over the pillows and blankets, making sure the bed would be comfortable for him. With more than enough room for Voryn this time, something that had excitement bubbling away in his chest. 

“What are the potions for?” Nerevar asked as he added his own pillow to the bed, still arranging it. It was annoying to do it in heat--normally he got started a few days prior, but whatever. 

“... Birth control.” Voryn admitted, and Nerevar’s hands stopped briefly. 

He knew that was only logical. Even if they ended up going further, actually having sex or mating entirely, most didn’t want to have kids the first time. It took a while to adjust to a mate, see if you wanted to keep the bond… Then again, it was said fated mates couldn’t remove the bond once they did mate.

Still, hearing ‘birth control’ made it seem that much more… Real. They were going to spending Voryn’s rut and Nerevar’s heat together. Very easily one thing could lead to another, and he could… Actually have sex with Voryn. 

“... Better to be prepared than not.” Nerevar finally replied, resuming his work, before flopping into the nest he made. As soon as he was situated, Voryn stripped out of the additional robe he threw on top of his night clothes for decency, climbing in to lay beside Nerevar. 

“Did you eat properly?” He asked, fretting over him. Nerevar snorted. 

“Says the one who forgot to eat.” Nerevar teased. 

“I was…” Voryn sighed. “Too anxious to eat. I get wound up during a rut, and the idea of eating was nauseating.” He closed his eyes. “Until you showed up.” 

“Well I’m glad I made it easier for you.” Nerevar smiled. “And for your information, yes. I did in fact eat a large breakfast and lunch, as always.” He always had a big appetite after all, though he was especially ravenous during heats. “Though I wont say no to a big mudcrab feast for dinner~” Voryn laughed loudly at that, head thrown back and canines glinting. Nerevar swallowed roughly at the sight, subconsciously rubbing his own neck. 

“I’m glad you’re well fed then.” Voryn was still smiling warmly. “Hopefully you won’t eat me out of house and home.”

“Get a bigger house then if I do.” Nerevar teased back. 

“I certainly will have to, won’t I?” Voryn was smirking now, rolling on top of Nerevar. “I have to keep my mate well taken care of…” Voryn went back to his neck, kissing and licking now, earning several long, breathy moans from Nerevar. 

Gods, did Nerevar know what Vivec meant when he said heats were so much easier like this. Nerevar thought obviously a mate or even just a potential one you spent a heat with would make it a bit more bearable. But this… He didn’t feel nearly as irritable as he usually was, now feeling quite secure, not to mention his arousal wasn’t frustrating it just…

“Mmm…” Voryn groaned softly, grinding his hips against Nerevar’s. “Such a sweet scent when you’re aroused…” Voryn nipped at his ear next, making Nerevar arch up and keen. 

“Ah,” Nerevar gasped, grinding his hips in return, “Is it?” He didn’t have many people telling him he smelled sweet; usually he was compared to things that were fresh and bright, like citrus or herbs.

“Delightfully sweet.” Voryn purred. “Perfectly so, just to my taste…” Voryn then pulled up from his neck, taking his chin in hand. 

Nerevar’s heartbeat accelerated from the look in Voryn’s eyes. In every raunchy novel he read, alphas were described as ravenously hungry when they stared down omegas, like a predator having just caught its prey. But here Nerevar didn’t feel like prey; Voryn’s eyes were hungry, yes, but more so they were warm, affectionate and…

Loving. Devoted. Like he would do anything and everything for Nerevar’s sake. 

Nerevar’s eyes fell half shut as he found himself leaning up, Voryn meeting him halfway to connect their lips in a soft, gentle kiss. 

It was entirely out of order; normally you kissed and courted someone before you invited them to spend a rut or heat with you, contrary to many smutty novels and ballads where the couple spontaneously fell into bed together during one. By Azura, the two already knew each other for so many years too, and they were just barely kissing… 

Gods, no wonder people described it like fate. It felt insane that they hadn’t kissed before now. That it took so long for them to get here, sprawled out in bed together. The scent from Voryn was intoxicating as the kisses warmed up from slow and soft to passionate ones that made Nerevar feel entirely breathless. When Nerevar swiped his tongue into Voryn’s mouth, flicking briefly against his fangs, Nerevar shuddered, slipping one hand down between his thighs to rub back and forth against his dick. 

“So eager…” Voryn moaned against his lips, his own hand joining Nerevar’s. Even through the fabric the touch was electric, Nerevar’s body trembling slightly. “Did you want a toy inside you then?” Voryn asked, his voice low and deep, the sound going straight to Nerevar’s cunt. 

“Yeah…” Nerevar moaned softly. “A toy, your fingers…” Voryn was already undressing him, throwing the robe open and sliding his underwear off, “Anything…” 

“My cock?” Voryn offered with a smirk, only joking. Still though, Nerevar groaned at the thought; fuck yes did he want Voryn’s cock in him, fucking him to completion and then knotting him. He was already dripping wet at just the idea, after all. But he also knew they should take things slower.

“T-toy for now…” Nerevar groaned through grit teeth, before hissing as Voryn played with his dick while fishing around in the bag beside the bed. 

“Which one?” Voryn asked, still not letting up his teasing in the slightest. It felt so damn good, but Nerevar felt too empty! He threw an arm over his eyes, panting.

“Th-the…” Using his words was more difficult than he thought. “The one with the… Big knot~” A moment later, Voryn pulled it out, sliding the tip against Nerevar’s entrance. “Hah~!” 

“Is this one your favorite?” Voryn asked, a devilish smirk still on his face. Nerevar didn’t even have to look, he could feel the pleased look on his face as he started to tease it in. 

“Mm, when I’m in heat, yeah~” He could have lied, but what was the fucking point? Voryn was already fucking him with the damn thing, why play coy? Voryn slid it in a few inches, groaning softly as he watched it vanish into Nerevar’s body, before thrusting it in and out. It was a different rhythm than Nerevar used, but like everything else today it wasn’t unwelcomed. 

“Oh I’ll bet…” Voryn purred. “When you’re in heat you love taking a nice,” He gave a sharper thrust, letting Nerevar take it all up to just before the knot, but not quite pushing it in, “Big knot in your greedy little cunt, don’t you?” 

“Yes!” 

“Would you fuck yourself to completion and then take the whole thing?” He continued moving at that sharp, hurried pace as he slid it in and out of Nerevar.

“Fuck, yes—yes!!” He was panting desperately now, savoring the feeling. Voryn’s dirty talk was making this all the better—how had he gone so long without this?! If he’d known it would be this good, he’d have climbed into Voryn’s bed long before this.

“Imagining someone breeding you up?” Voryn was panting too, watching Nerevar with rapt attention. 

“Please,” Nerevar pleaded, feeling how close he was to an orgasm just hearing that. “Please, please~!” He tried grinding his hips down on the toy, desperate to feel the knot slipping inside him, but Voryn kept it from doing so. 

“My knot is the only one you’re going to feel this time, Neht.” Voryn growled low in Nerevar’s ear. “Only mine.” 

In response, Nerevar growled in return, quickly flipping positions as he climbed on top of Voryn instead. The toy completely slipped out, soon lost in the piles of pillows and blankets, as Voryn growled in return. The two were wrestling once again, though this time it wasn’t quite as playful. Honestly, Nerevar probably would have won this one by how seriously he was taking it, but heats made his body so groggy he wasn’t up to his usual strength. 

“Get inside me then.” Nerevar demanded through grit teeth as Voryn shoved him back down, prying his legs back open.

“Lay there and I will.” Nerevar still snarled, thrashing. “Now hold still or I’ll make you.” The threat made his cunt ache again, a long moan crawling out of his throat.

“Potion—“ Nerevar freed one arm, reaching for them. Voryn grabbed one, placing it in Nerevar’s hand as he finished undressing himself. Nerevar uncapped it and threw his head back, chugging it.

To Oblivion with taking it slow. He needed Voryn—all of him.

He tossed the potion bottle aside, wrapping his arms around Voryn as he nuzzled his face into his neck, now being the one to lick and kiss at a scent gland, almost intoxicated by the spice and musk. 

“Neht,” Voryn hissed. 

“Let’s mate.” Nerevar whispered, before feeling Voryn tense up. Silence followed, except for Voryn’s heavy breathing.

“Nerevar we don’t have to mate just to—“

“I want to.” Nerevar pulled back enough to look at him. “Be honest with me Voryn, who else am I going to mate with?” The very idea Nerevar could mate with someone else made Voryn’s anger spike, clear from the scent he gave off. “And even if we just tried to deny mating, just spending heats and ruts together, we’ll both lose it eventually.” The draw was supposedly undeniable, and Nerevar wanted to do it at least semi lucid without pain and desperation making the experience less enjoyable. 

“Besides,” Nerevar now gave a warm smile, the low light still twinkling in his eyes. “You’re a very devoted, loving, strong alpha…” Voryn shuddered. “Making sure I’m well fed, giving me medicine…”

“I have to take care of you…” Voryn whispered. “You mean the world to me.”

“Exactly.” Nerevar was still smiling, now thumbing at Voryn’s lower lip as he cupped his cheek. “Who else could possibly take care of me as well as you? You’re the one who’s always been there for me. You guarded my back in war, supported me on my quest to become hortator, and even long before I was a hero, just some canvasari not even wanted by his own house, you took care of me and showed me respect.” Just as easily, Voryn could have tossed him aside. Childish friendships with lower classes didn’t need to be kept by chimer nobility. Any other would have probably ‘outgrown’ Nerevar, but Voryn didn’t. Because Voryn didn’t just see Nerevar as a toy to be played with and tossed aside but as himself. 

Honestly, even being tossed aside by another noble would have been a good outcome. Many would have also taken Nerevar as a concubine after he presented, or sold him off given he had nowhere else to go. But Voryn always saw him as a friend he treasured.

“But,” Voryn gave a sigh, “You don’t love me.”

Ah. Nerevar didn’t think Voryn was the type to only want to mate when you truly loved someone. It only made sense he supposed, most people did, but he was used to seeing things in terms of practicality.

“Voryn,” He stroked his cheek, “Maybe I don’t love you romantically… Yet.” Nerevar wouldn’t discount that at all; if he’d fall in love with anyone, right now he imagined it would be Voryn. “And I don’t really know… What it’s even like to fall in love with someone completely like that given I’ve only had a few flings and a political marriage but,” He looked up into Voryn’s eyes, never more certain in matters of the heart than he was now. “I do know I care about you deeply. More than anyone else in my life.” Nerevar licked his lips. “And there is no person in the world I’d rather be mated with than you.” 

Silence then followed, Voryn staring at him in shock. Suddenly nervous, Nerevar began to backpedal slightly. 

“Of course I understand if you want to wait. I-gods, it would probably be easier for you if we did the whole courtship and dating thing first, wouldn’t it—“ He was then cut off by a kiss, Voryn’s tongue swiping into his mouth.

“I want to mate with you, Neht.” Voryn whispered, as he pulled away with a smile. “Tonight.”

“Are you sure? I—“ Nerevar swallowed roughly as he felt Voryn lift one of his legs up, his own instincts screaming at him that he needed this—that he needed to stop talking and get fucked right then and there.

“I’m certain.” Voryn said, his tone unwavering as he kept that warm smile on his face, his eyes shining. “Do you want me to mate with you before, during, or after?”

Nerevar licked his lips, thinking it over. A claiming bite was said to be extremely pleasurable, once the initial pain wore off. Some preferred to get it out of the way before sex, enjoying their new bond before warming back up. Some preferred the orgasmic rush that came with a claiming bite in the middle of sex. Others preferred to claim their mates while they laid together, panting and connected after being knotted.

“Not before,” Nerevar answered, his whole body still feeling warm. “I can’t… I can’t wait that long.” His body was still screaming at him to move, push the alpha on top of him down and ride him if he wasn’t going to take Nerevar already. He was squirming, antsy under Voryn’s gaze, and feeling too fucking empty again to think properly.

“Here,” Voryn whispered, pressing the head of his cock to Nerevar’s entrance. Nerevar’s breath hitched, before giving a long, drawn out moan as Voryn slid inside. “Why don’t we just see what feels right in the moment…”

“Voryn~!” Nerevar arched up, trembling slightly. 

It felt good. It felt right. It occurred to him, at that moment, that this was what he’d wanted every heat. Every struggling minute of desperation, every orgasm that didn’t quite feel satisfying enough—he wanted Voryn. 

Voryn threaded his fingers with Nerevar’s, pinning both of his hands to the bed as he gave a slow thrust, kissing him for all he was worth. No wonder his heats were so much more unbearable after he moved to Mournhold—he had assumed it was the heat and stress of being king, but he knew now it was his body screaming at him to return back to Voryn. To lose himself in Voryn’s embrace, just like this.

“Fuck…” Voryn groaned as he pulled away from the messy kiss. “Incredible—you feel incredible~”

Such a comment only stroked his pride, adding to the pleasure. He was making his mate feel good. He was making his mate feel just as good as he felt. It was enough to make his head spin, as every thrust quickly matched that sharp, hurried pace Voryn had set earlier with the toy.

“Claim me~” Nerevar whined, turning his head to expose his neck. Nerevar could feel it—he wanted to be claimed. Oh gods did he want to be claimed! Before he felt disgust whenever alphas glanced at his neck, trying to determine if he was a claimed omega or a beta of some kind. But now though he wanted it more than anything—

Voryn complied, moving down quickly, not letting the pace of his thrusts falter as he growled, nuzzling Nerevar’s neck. He licked and kissed, listening to every sharp whine from Nerevar that followed, before finally biting.

Nerevar’s mind went blank the second Voryn bit him, his eyes rolling back as he orgasmed.

It felt unreal—every fucking novel he read left him sorely unprepared for the pleasurable rush that hit him. It was pure bliss; every nerve in his body burning brightly from ecstasy, as Voryn growled deeply. 

He was officially mated. He belonged to Voryn. He found his mate and everything felt perfect, sparks still shooting up and down his spine as Voryn pulled his teeth out, panting and growling even more harshly as his hips somehow moved faster and rougher. He could feel Voryn’s knot forming too, pumping in and out of his cunt in a way that hit his sweet spot every time.

“Tight—!” Voryn snarled. “So tight, so damn tight… Neht!” 

“Knot me…” Nerevar moaned, coaxing Voryn further, feeling intoxicated from the pleasure still coursing through him. “Knot me, breed me up~” He ground his hips down at every thrust inside him, forcing Voryn to change the rhythm. Now, every thrust in he stayed a moment longer, grinding down, his knot catching on Nerevar’s entrance.

By now, Voryn had let go of Nerevar’s hands, face still buried in Nerevar’s neck as he moaned and growled into his ear. “I’m going to,“ Voryn panted. “I’m going to breed you, knot you until I know my seed takes—!” It wouldn’t, not after the potion Nerevar took, but he wasn’t thinking logically at the moment. All he was thinking about was how great it felt being fucked and bred by his mate, his alpha. “Mine! You’re all mine! Mine mine mine mine mine—!”

Finally, the knot refused to slip out. It swelled up completely, pressed firmly inside him, and Nerevar gasped as a new sensation overtook him. 

He felt himself tighten even further, making Voryn  moan long and loud, as the two were now firmly locked together. An orgasm hit him next, even more intense than the one from the claiming bite. If the bite was an intense, all encompassing blast of fire—like a star going supernova—this one was a drawn out burn. His mind didn’t go blank, instead forcing him to focus on the pleasure, as he felt heat inside him.

“Fuck~!!” Nerevar yelled, practically screaming, dragging his nails down Voryn’s back as his body shuddered, his cunt clenching and milking the cock still firmly sealed inside him. 

He knew what it was, yet he never really experienced it, so his knowledge was only really how it would be in theory. He never let an alpha knot him, after all; even if he had to have sex for political reasons he doused himself in perfume oil to hide his pheromones and always made sure they pulled out. Supposedly an omega locking happened much more commonly in heat, tightening around the knot as they orgasmed, keeping every drop of seed in to ensure conception…

Nerevar felt another wave of the long orgasm following, a broken, garbled moan spilling from his lips as Voryn rocked his hips.

“Stop moving!” Nerevar pleaded. If he kept rocking his knot right there—right against Nerevar’s sweet spot—he was never going to stop climaxing.

“Stop cumming!” Voryn hissed back, before groaning. “Oh gods you’re milking me for every drop!” He continued the slow rocking, as Nerevar felt fuller and fuller, his vision going hazy as tears rolled down his cheeks. 

“I can’t…” Nerevar whined. “Too full…” Nerevar groaned, still trembling. “It’s too much….” There was too much inside him—before he felt painfully empty, and now he felt far too full. Voryn’s cock, his knot, and every drop of seed was filling him—

Another wave of pleasure followed, as Voryn growled. 

“Your body wants this so badly…” He snarled, nipping at the claiming bite he left. “Get pregnant!” He hissed, enjoying the way Nerevar’s body tightened around him once more. The command was enough to make him shudder, yet another wave of pleasure following. “Get pregnant, get pregnant!” Voryn urged with a bit more rocking, before Nerevar tugged him into another messy, open mouthed kiss.

If it wasn’t for the potion, Nerevar knew he would be. It seemed impossible for him not to conceive when it felt this good—when he was so full and not a drop spilling out of him despite Voryn’s movements… 

Eventually the pleasure subsided, Voryn’s movements slowing as their kiss went from feral and intense to something slower and lazier, kissing each other over and over as Nerevar ran his hands through Voryn’s long hair. 

“Fuck…” Nerevar groaned, breathlessly. “Intense…” It felt like an understatement, but that was the only word that came to mind as Voryn panted. 

“Gods…” Voryn groaned. “You were… Tighter than I had expected…” He hissed, shifting slightly again, but this time just to help them lay more comfortably. 

“It still feels too big…” Nerevar groaned. Now it was slightly uncomfortable, but he knew the more they did this, the more his body would adjust. To help ease his discomfort, Voryn pressed a few gentle kisses to his face, keeping himself still.

“Is it too full?” Voryn asked, and Nerevar nodded. Voryn sat up slightly, and the pressure being taken off his lower stomach was a relief, especially as Voryn caressed it. 

As Nerevar looked down, he could see why: there was a slight swell in his stomach from the pressure. He groaned, already regretting the decision to have sex on his back. He knew now why omegas preferred mating face down, and that it had nothing to do with submission and instead purely comfort.

“Don’t worry,” Voryn reassured him. “Just a few minutes…” His voice trailed off as his eyes went dark, taking in the sight of Nerevar under him, panting and covered in sweat, filled with his seed. Nerevar could tell what he was thinking from the change of the scent in the air, sparks from their newly formed connection.

“Like what you see…?” Nerevar asked with a toothy, cocky grin, only to groan as he felt Voryn shift again.

“Keep acting like that and I’ll only want to take you again…” Voryn replied, his voice low. Nerevar still felt rather proud at that; his mate didn’t like a soft, demure, and submissive type of omega like he always kind of worried an alpha would demand once they mated. Instead, Voryn seemed to enjoy him earnestly, even with all of his showboating and teasing.

“Maybe you should…” Nerevar purred in response. “We can have dinner, a relaxing bath to recover…” Nerevar’s eyes were half lidded as he spoke. “And then you can fill me up all over again…” 

The warm, messy kiss Voryn gave him was all the answer Nerevar needed.  

#nerevoryn #nerevar #indoril nerevar #voryn dagoth #ill edit this and post it on ao3 later #curse all the citizens of the fanfic website #my writing #not sfw #i already have more curse omegaverse ideas for these idiots #like neht going into heat suddenly while still a canvasari and voryn having to protect him all the way back to kogoruhn #but i will let you all suffer with this #for now

[chemicallady]

I LOVE YOU TO DEATH BUT I'M DROWING

Part 1

Couple: Noah Sebastian x Fem Reader

Content Warning: talking about sex; bondage, possible heartbreak.

Summary:  getting closer to Noah is like trying to give a quick look into an abyss; it's impossible not to fall down with all your certains.

And in the end, a firm decision must be make.

Taglist: @lilhobgobbler ; @aprosiacperson

A/N: no smut in this one, sorry for that but this is the last introduction chapter, I promise. I need to do more research on /the topic/ you will find out reading but I promise you this is the last slow chapter. From next one on, we all will be on fire 🔥

Thanks to all the kind souls who are reading my story. As usual, I don't know Noah, this is fictional and I respectfully don't want to offende anyone.

Maybe for someone, reader and noah could look a bit weird in comparison with many other ff; I love realism so those dialogues sounds 'possibile' in my head. As long as the situations.

Enjoy!

《 I was fantasising on binding you.》

Day off are so weird, sometimes. Becca and Mandy, the other two merch girls, bonded pretty quick and you feel a bit left behind when you woke up in the room you share with them and they weren't anywhere to be found. You can understand why they decided to spend their day off without you, to be honest. You all are I'm New York and due to the Blue Ridge Festival being last minute canceled, the entire crew gained two days off in the Big Apple. You're relieved from some aspects because that festival is HUGE and you don't like the idea of so many fans asking for t-shirt and ski mask for hours and hours under the sun. At the same time, you regret a little how you declined Steve invitation to organise a cozy dinner in his room with him, Mandy, Becca and Chris.

The reason of this decline is all Noah's fault.

Entirely.

《 Why are you looking at me like that?》

《 I was just thinking...》

《 C'mon. Spill the tea. I believe we have enough intimacy at this rate》.

Some kind of weird silence filled the elevator making the air heavy. Good job, y/n. You were able to create even more tensions between the two of you. More than then, this sarcasm is not helping. There is not such a thing as intimacy between the two of you.

Being fucked due to an excess of stamina before a gig is not like having a long walk in the nature, hands in hands.

It's rough and primal. Exciting but somehow dry. Emotionally dry, of course, because you feel nothing but wetness rethinking about all your encounters.

Noah is not answering and neither looking at you, and you have almost reached his floor. You take a long breath before speaking again. 《 I know I'm crossing some boundaries, but it's weird. We had some best buddies moments and them because I kissed you once, you stop talking to me and started to act pretty directly. 》

It's so frustrating being an extrovert who is trying to explain is feelings to an introvert who is actually not replying at all.

《 I mean, I really enjoy the fun time you give me, but it's not like I've pictured us.》

Oh that was too much. Why did you say that???

《 and I didn't actually pictured us. It was more like a chill situationship in my head because you gave me some vibes but-》

《 God dammit I was just fantasizing on binding you. That's it, y/n.》

The elevators doors open but you prevented him to escape the situation. 《 alright this is even weirder》, is you reply while you push the bottom to close the door again. And then the one to go back to the main hall. Your are not a shy person, at least not now. Not with the guy who apparently loves to fuck the shit out of you in front of a mirror. He blushes, try to say something else but you are too confuse to let him explain 《binding me to what?》

The doors opens again in front of Matt. He looks at you surprised but before even say a word, Noah pushes the bottom to close the door. Like you have just done. And again to floor nine. 《 to nothing》 his is answer. He is in distress, like is really hard for him to provide you a decent explanation. 《 just... tide you up. Your body is so beautiful and I'd love to .... tide you up. But you are right, it's weird.》

You can feel a certain amount of disappointment in his voice and even if you don't really trust him that much or know him enough to get the exact meaning of this, you can't help yourself but touching his arm in reinsurance. His eyes meet yours and you just get a bit closer.

You're not an idiot, this guy is buff and could easily tak advantage on you, but you have seen something trustworth in him; he has such a gentle soul hidden behind an armor used to denied his very own feelings. Even if he is avoiding you, he is still gentle when you two meet around. Maybe, you overthinked for days, he is just as uncomfortable as you are with your rendezvous with zero talking in between.

《 I don't understand what you mean, that's why it's weird》 , you tell him. 《 I don't think you are weird. Well, maybe a bit, but mostly I think you're hot》 , you continue making him blush again. Noah chuckles a little laught while the elevation door get open for the second time on his floor. 《 Its a weird catch up phrase, Noah-idiot. Asking a girl to be tied up.》

《 You are not wrong》 he replies, amused by the way you're making him confortable with jokes, before putting an hand to stop the doors from closing again. 《 But... I can show you what I mean, if you want.》

《 Now?》

《 if you don't have any plans for dinner...》

《... Show me the way, tho 》.

You know that Steve and Chris really didn't care that you decided to not show up for dinner, but the girls are pissed. Anyway no one bought the excuse that you felt suddenly so tired to attend the gathering. That's why you woke up alone in the room. Looking back at your night conversation, you can't really feel sorry for missing it. But it also has a bitter taste from some point of views. You hate to be the one who has to take decisions.

But Noah is turning your world upside down.

You've never felt that way.

He makes you feel like someone else is wearing your skin. His eyes are trustful and when he feels enough secure of himself - weird how someone that pretty can he shy and with a low selfsteem- he turns into this primal, feral seducer. You can't get enough of him. His mouth on your body, the grip of his hands, firm but somehow armonic.

It looks like he have studied how to be a beast in bed. And after yesterday, you only got solid evidence of this suspicious.

You have never heard about Shibari before. Your have always pictured bondage as a strainge kink, connected with pain and humiliation and you're not the kind of person who likes to be humiliated at all. But Noah is pretty clear about what he actually wants.

《 Shibari is a matter of aesthetics》, he tells you why showing pictures of naked women tied up with beautiful knots and intricate ropes combinations. 《 Its not even connected directly with sex. The schemes of the ropes are related with specific body points; every knots has a deep simbolic meaning. My intention is not to control you or humiliate you, but just having some visual pleasure of your pretty body.》

You rise your eyes, trying to meeting his, but he looks a but insecure. Like is costing so much to him to expose himself. 《 If its not sex, what I get in return?》. You decide to ask first, trying to not sound greedy. On the contrary. It's quite interesting.

《 pleasure. I'll take care of you. My intentions are aesthetical but I'm still a guy.》 It's sounds so wrong seeing such a shy guy talking about this stuff and them imagining him doing such intricate knot on your body. You can't help but feel you're getting wet already and that a shame. Every inch of feminish is taken away from you in the moment you can spend some time with Noah.

《 This have something to do with the fact that you don't want to kiss me anymore?》

Another important question and Noah can't avoid but oblige you an answer. 《 No》

The dryness in this simple one word make you sigh in frustration. You look at one last photo before handing his phone back again to the boy seated next to you.《 Did you take all of this pictures?》

《 Yes.》

《Have you made sex with all these girls》

《 I usually don't make sex with a girl who likes this kind of things. I can go to a dive bar and meet someone for that. To me, this is work of art. It's helping me through a lot of stress the tour is giving me. You are an exception because you kissed me and I lost my balance.... but I believe I need to get it back》

The oddly sound of a silent hotel room followed his last sentence. 《... if I agree with all of this, with the ropes and knots, we stop to have fun before the concerts?》

Noah let himself fall on the mattres, lost in his thoughts. You can tell he doesn't no for sure. 《 Maybe. I can't tell you for sure. But the choice is up on you; I want force you anyway. 》

Since the moment you have left his room, you can't stop thinking about him. About how intrigued you feel in letting him doing whatsoever he wants with your body. More than that, everything you have will be just a dream in the moment the tour will be over.

You have in front of you one last month with Noah and the chance to experiment something new.

But do you really want to be part of his photo collection and be remembered just as another chick he tied up?

It's not so easy to pick up a decision.

Especially because you like him, a lot. And losing him will be painful anyway.

#noah sebastian #bad omens #noah sebastian imagine #noah sebastian x reader