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ahgasegotarmy116 · 18 days

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Just Take It | Jeon Jungkook | Part Five

Summary: You start a conversation with Jungkook about where you stand but are interrupted by an uninvited visitor Pairing: Inexperienced f!reader x Best Friend's Dad Jungkook (20 year age gap) Word Count: 4.7K~ Warnings: Suggestive and explicit language (an argument). Nothing too crazy honestly. Horribly edited too because it's been three weeks and I wanted to get it out! a/n: Sorry it took me so long to get this chapter out but I was away from home for a week and then wrote a couple of one shots and blah blah blah lol but anyways I hope you enjoyyyy Requested by: @kkusadmirer 💜

After our eventful afternoon Jungkook and I ended up laying in his bed and watching movies since like he said, he wanted me to be "well rested" before we have the talk. The talk that could change everything between us...

There are multiple outcomes to this scenario and I'm not sure if I'm ready for any of them.

On one hand he could say this was all a mistake and he was just acting on his urges. I know now for damn sure though that he's attracted to me but I don't know what his motives and feeling are towards me. If he even has any besides surface level physical attraction.

On the other hand he could want to pursue a friends with benefits sort of arrangement. Being fuck buddies or whatever with an older man does sound exciting when I think about doing it with him. It's just that don't know if I'd want something like that even if it was with him.

I told Jared before that I wanted to save myself for marriage and I feel like that's something I still want to stick to. I've definitely crossed so many lines with Jungkook in the last not even twenty four hours, more like twelve hours or something like that but regardless lines have been crossed and I'm still not sure how I feel about any of it.

I want to say that I don't regret it and it's not just because it felt fucking phenomenal and out of this world but because I feel safe with him.

It might just be because over the past couple of months that I've been living with him he's become someone I care about and honestly trust with my life so I didn't really feel a need to say no to him. I wanted it to happen, I know I did I just didn't really think it would ever happen. I thought that it would stay in my hormonal fantasies forever and I was okay with that.

The way he's been treating me has shown me that he cares about me. Although I was trying to convince myself that it was somewhat of a paternal instinct in him and that he was just being protective over me, I knew that it was something beyond that.

I tried to somewhat address it in a weird sort of way with the whole asking why he didn't have anyone over conversation and he knew what I was trying to ask and addressed it but his answer me even more confused.

"I wouldn't want to ruin what we have going on here" like what does that even mean? He doesn't want to ruin the dynamic we have in the house in terms of we're comfortable with each other and feel no need to let anyone inside our little safe space.

Or did he mean that he didn't want to ruin what we have going on here because he wanted to see where things went with us on a more romantic level?

He hasn't explicitly told me that he would want to pursue a relationship with me but circling back to before he's given me clear signs that he's attracted to me and isn't one to hide it.

He knows to a certain extent that I find him attractive too because I asked him to take my virginity. (I'm never gonna be able to live that one down) Anyone could tell that he was clearly struggling to hold himself back and the fact that he kissed me just shows that he wanted to. That he wanted me.

Then there's another possibility that he might want a sugar baby sort of relationship and I don't even want to think about something like that.

Don't get me wrong! I respect the hustle, but that's just not for me.

If I'm gonna be doing something like what we are doing right now then I want it to be something that I want to do without any ulterior motive. I don't want to put a monetary value on the time I spend with him but not gonna lie, living it large and not having to worry about money or working sounds very tempting.

I don't think he's that kind of man though...or at least I hope he's not.

"Penny for your thoughts?" he asks playfully, having noticed that I haven't really been paying attention to the movie we've been watching.

"Just thinking" I answer, cuddling in closer to him as I've refused to let go of him today and he hasn't made moves to do any different.

"Bout what?" he prods further, placing a kiss on the top of my head and taking in the fresh scent of his shampoo in my hair.

"Things" I continue, liking the game we've started to play.

"What sort of things?" he chuckles, telling me that he's enjoying it too.

"All kinds of things" I say nuzzling closer into him and he wraps his arm tighter around me to keep me there.

"Wanna share a few?" he asks, clearly not letting this go since he wants to at least make sure I'm okay.

"Thinking about how you might want to make me your sugar baby" I mumble into his chest and he laughs wholeheartedly making me even more embarrassed.

"Is that something you'd want?" he asks and I shake my head.

"You don't wanna be at home and sit pretty, waiting for me to come back and shower you with gifts and jewelry and give you the world?" he teases while pinching my sides making me pull away from him, trying to escape.

"N-no! Now s-stop" I choke out through laughter and gasps of breath. "What would you want" he asks after having tackled me down onto the mattress making sure to do a thorough job of tickling me until I could barely breathe.

I take a second to think, my eyes going back and forth between his while his stay still, focused and almost begging for an answer.

"I thought we weren't going to have this conversation until I was well rested" I say, breathless, still not knowing up from down when it comes to us. If there even is an 'us'.

"You feel well rested?" he asks, cocking a brow at me and I nod my head quickly, giving me a crooked smile in response. "Then it's perfect timing right?" he continues and I nod again leaving him getting off of me and leaning his back against the headboard, waiting to hear what I have to say.

I take a minute or so to gather my thoughts and the whole time he's watching me curiously, almost able to see the wheels turning in my head.

"What happened between us kind of caught me by surprise" I start, looking down at my lap and playing with my fingers nervously. "I don't regret it, it was just, well I'm just kind of confused about how you feel about me, and I'm really confused about how I feel about you" I admit and I can see his expression go a bit wary but I jump at the chance to explain myself.

"It's just that I think both of us know at this point that we're extremely attracted to each other" I start out and the corner of his lips upturns for a second but nods in confirmation, waiting for me to continue.

"With us getting physical and all so quickly I can't help but think that maybe we should take a step back. I would like to know your thoughts and intentions and feelings about all of this. I might be overthinking it but I really think it's best to be up front and honest with each other" I say and take in a shaky breath, scared I might've said the wrong thing.

"You're so sexy when you act so mature like that" he taunts and I groan, wanting to keep this serious. "I'm just playing Bunny. Well I'm not because you really are sexy but I don't want you to feel all nervous and insecure like you are right now. We're being open and honest right?" he questions and I nod my head, eager for him to continue.

"Meaning it would be the perfect opportunity to tell you that I have feelings for you right?" he says and my eye bug out in response, not knowing what to do now. "Wasn't expecting that huh?" he chuckles and I shake my head making him laugh even more.

"Cat got your tongue Darling?" he teases and scoff at that. "No I was just being polite and letting you keep talking since you let me do the same" I say, making excuses and trying to keep my voice level.

"Sure Bunny" he smirks not believing a word I said but continuing nevertheless.

"I've had feelings for you for a while now and I haven't told you or acted on it because I wanted to respect the fact that you were in a relationship. I never liked Jared though for what it's worth" he says without hesitation and it makes me cringe at the thought that I was about to marry that snake.

"Is it harsh to say I'm glad he's out of the picture?" he says boldly making me laugh. "Not just because it benefitted me but because he didn't deserve to marry a beautiful, intelligent, kind hearted woman like you. I would've said something but I'm not your father so I knew it wasn't my place" he finishes and making me smile, thankful that he was so considerate.

Now that I think about it, even back then I respected and trusted his judgement so it wouldn't have bothered me even if he did say something.

"It's not harsh to say because I'm happy about it too. To be honest though I don't really know what I ever saw in him. I think because he was the first guy that more or less respected my boundaries that I thought I had to hold onto him. I don't know" I say and he nods his head.

This is something I haven't experienced before. Someone sitting and taking the time to actually talk things out without any outside distractions and focusing on each other and hearing each other out.

Maybe it's just an age thing and the fact that Jungkook does fit the standard of dating older and more mature men is better. We're not dating though, but I guess we'll hopefully figure out where we stand once this conversation comes to a close.

"I'm really confused and I kind of don't know how to feel but I'm not closed off to figuring things out" I say, glancing up at him and back down at my lap, nervous from seeing how fascinated he is with me right now.

I hold my breath and wait for him to say something but when nothing ever comes I chance looking up at him again and I'm surprised to see how he's still watching me.

"Like I said, I've had feelings for you for a while and if you're open to seeing where things go then I would really like to take you out on a date. Like on a proper date. I know since we've been living together and we've been spending a lot of time together but I-" he start off strong but begins to ramble and is regretfully cut off by the sound of the front door opening.

"Dad! Dad where are you?" Jina calls out and neither of us dares to move or make a sound. "Dad" Jina drags out, regretfully confirming that I am in fact not dreaming. "Be down in a second" he says then presses a finger to his lips.

"Just stay in here and I'll take care of it" he whispers and I nod my head, watching him as he panics internally before leaving the room and closing the door softly behind him.

What the hell are we gonna do? My car is out there! Or wait, did I put it in the garage yesterday? I can't remember but I really hope it's not out there otherwise she'll already know I'm here.

"What are you doing here?" Jungkook says. I can hear his muffled voice through the walls and I know I probably shouldn't listen but curiosity gets the best of me making me rush to the door and quietly crack it open, needing to hear how this conversation goes.

"Nice to see you too dad" she says, and I hate the fact that I'm only able to hear them but I'll settle for this.

"You should've contacted me before you came over Jina. You know I don't like people showing up unannounced" he says sternly.

"You're usually totally fine with me coming over" she says sounding thoroughly confused and I can hear Jungkook clear his throat before she starts again.

"Am I interrupting something?" she asks after no doubt clocking the dishes that were left over from lunch. Two plates, two cups and two sets of silverware. A dead giveaway that someone is here especially since it hasn't been cleaned up yet.

"You are actually" he says and I trip, surprised that he would straight up admit it but he has no reason to hide, and neither do I.

Having pushed the door open thanks to my clumsiness (somehow able to stay upright and keep my dignity this time) I'm faced with the dilemma of if I should just go back inside and pretend that never happened when it clearly did or come out and face her.

I'm given the luxury of having that choice since she hasn't seen me yet but I decide it's better to do this as soon as possible. We've hid the fact that I've been living here for two months so what's adding on the fact that I've been messing around with her father while doing so.

(Although this is a newly added feature but she doesn't need to know that)

I take a deep breath before stepping out from behind the door, watching Jina's face go from surprised to confused to disgusted to angry before turning back towards her father.

"You're fucking my best friend?" she accuses, not completely wrong but semantics.

"Best friend's don't fuck around and get pregnant by their friend's fiancees" I remind her, walking down the stairs in conveniently only Jungkook's shirt making what's going on, or what's starting to go on between us even more clear.

"Oh grow up! It's not like there's anything we can do to change that now can we? Plus looks like you're doing just fine without him" she throws at me and from that moment I'm not pulling any punches. She wants to play dirty? Fine, let's play dirty.

"Jina stop it" Jungkook growls, going on the defensive, not being able to gauge what kind of mindset she's in or even her reasoning for coming here but wanting her out all the same.

"Grow up?" I chuckle dryly, "I guess you're right, I guess maybe I have started growing up since it seems I've matured enough to be with someone like your father. Which, last time I checked, wasn't someone you have any business in questioning on things like his sex life and who he does and does not partake in it with" I say, placing a hand on his bicep possessively and I feel the tension he had once held in his body start to melt away.

Interesting to know that I have this effect on him...

"Come on, we both know that you're probably just a piece of ass to him" she scoffs before turning to address him. "Didn't know you started picking up strays. I wondered where she had ran off to" she says, continuing to disrespect the both of us without a care in the world.

"Don't call her that!" Jungkook says, jaw clenched as a way to keep himself in check.

All I see is red though and the next words I hurl out are ones that I couldn't stop myself from saying even if I tried. The ringing in my ears fanning the flames of my agitation making it impossible to hold back.

"How's life being pregnant with my fucking ex boyfriend's baby? He's probably taking real good care of you huh?" I taunt, cocking a brow at her and from the way the color rushes to her cheeks and the words die in her throat are enough to tell me everything I need to know.

He hasn't done shit for her.

She balls her hands into fists by her side and lunges at me but Jungkook jumps in between us, grabs her by the shoulders and turns her around, forcing her out the front door.

"You're gonna throw me out and choose that slut over your own daughter?" she yells struggling to get out of his grasp the whole way.

"Last time I checked honey the only slut around these parts is you" I throw back, following right behind them and the way her jaw drops is just priceless.

"That's enough! Jina go!" Jungkook says through gritted teeth letting go of her once she's passed the thresh hold, leaving her standing there, looking between the two of us before scoffing and storming off down the driveway.

"I knew you were obsessed with her I just never thought you would bother acting on it" Jina spits out at her father and when she sees that he doesn't flinch she hurls more baseless lies and insults at the both of us.

"You know she's just using you to get a place to stay and get over her ex right? What happened to staying a virgin until you got married y/n? Huh? Guess getting cheated on really fucked you up" she spits while unlocking her car.

"And I guess fucking around with an ego-driven two-timing narcissist gets you pregnant" I throw back and she purses her lips before sinking down in her car, accepting defeat this time and leaving like her father told her to.

"Say hi to Jared for me" I call out, waving at her as she grips the steering wheel until her knuckles have gone white, putting it in drive and backing out of the driveway.

I walk over to the couch and let out a big sigh once I've sat down, throwing my head in my hands as a way to ground myself.

Breathing through this dizzy feeling from that whole confrontation that I had not been prepared for is a lot tougher than I thought it would be, my whole body still buzzing.

I hear Jungkook close the door behind him after having watched her speed down the street, still worried for her safety but also wanting to make sure she was actually gone. What happened just now was enough of a confrontation to last me a lifetime, or at least it feels that way.

"Hey" he whispers, kneeling in front of me and rubbing my back, "Are you okay?" he continues and I nod my head, feeling the tears prickling in my eyes, calling my bluff.

"Come here" he whispers, sitting on the couch next to me and pulling me onto his lap, rubbing my back again and holding me while I let out some of those tears I had held back.

"I don't even know why I crying" I say, sniffling and sitting back up to dry my eyes.

"No one likes getting into fights with someone they used to care about. Well, nobody sane likes getting into fights with someone they used to care about" he says, trying to lighten the mood and it does the trick making me scoff a bit, smiling at his efforts to make me feel better.

He cups my face and wipes a few tears that had fallen, looking at me with his brows pinched together as if his heart is breaking with mine.

"But you still care about her though, don't you?" he asks and I nod my head. "It's hard not to" I admit, getting off his lap and sitting next to him which makes him angle his body to face mine, taking hold of one of my hands, encouraging me to speak my mind.

"She's been my best friend for the past five years. That's not something that can magically be turned off for me. I know what she did to me was devastating and I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive her for it. I'm still trying to heal from it all so I don't know, I couldn't help but defend myself, and you. I'm sorry you had to see that" I say, mumbling the last part and feeling so much regret for saying those ugly things about his daughter right in front of him.

"Everyone has a right to defend themselves and when you're being attacked like that, you can't help but say hurtful things. She had no right and she knew that and wanted to hurt the both of us anyway" he says and I take a deep breath before turning my attention back to him because she said just as many hurtful things to him as she did to me.

"Are you okay?" I question, tightening my hold on his hand to hopefully encourage him to be vulnerable with me as well.

He nods his head with a sad smile and waits a beat before saying anything and I hold my breath until he does.

"No one wants their daughter to end up in the kind situation she put herself in or see the people that they care about hurting but what she said didn't hurt me" he says and I nod my head, paying attention to his hand that I have placed in my lap, tracing the swirls of ink with my eyes as they travel further up his arm.

"What did hurt me though was the way she was talking about you. You know that's not how I feel about you at all right?" he says, tilting my face up towards him making purposeful eye contact with me, needing to know that I believe him.

"I know" I nod, giving him a sad smile accompanied by my still glossy eyes making him even more sad seeing how upset all of this has made me.

"Can I do anything to make you feel better?" he asks, cupping my face and keeping my eyes on him when I try to turn them away. "No, I'll be okay" I shake my head and he studies my features before nodding and accepting my words at face value.

"Okay, do you wanna go back up to my room? You can sleep in there with me if you'd like" he says, brushing a tear dampened strand of hair out of my face.

I give him a mischievous smile, telling him I know what he's up to but he pulls away and puts his hands up in a way to defend his motives.

"Just sleep, I promise. Scouts honor" he says, crossing his heart and I laugh at his playfully defensive nature. "Sure" I say, taking hold of his hand while he stands up and leads me back to his bedroom.

~~~~

After having talked a little bit more about what had happened the topic of conversation circles back to what we had been in the middle of before she showed up.

"So earlier it seemed like you wanted to ask me a question" I say, taking a sip from my soda that had come with the take out we had ordered hours ago, toying with the straw and keeping his attention.

"Yeah? And do you know what your answer might be to said question?" he teases, wetting his lips and keeping his eyes trained on mine.

"You have to ask the questions first Daddy" I say placing my drink down on his nightstand and when I turn to face him again he's tackling me down on the bed peppering kisses all over me.

"Stoooppp" I giggle and he laughs along with me before leaning back to hover over me. "Will you go out with me?" he asks and I can tell that this whole moment has him feeling like a teenager again.

"I thought you'd never ask" I say, running my fingers through his hair making him lean into my touch.

"You can't take it back though. Once we do this I won't ever let you go" he husks out, placing a kiss on my palm and I shutter at the feeling. "Then don't" I breathe out making a flame of desire flash through his eyes.

"You're gonna get yourself in trouble you know that?" he warns, placing a kiss on my nose before getting off me and turning off the tv. "Hey! I was watching that!" I pout "No you weren't" he chuckles. "Plus it's time to go to bed. We've got a big day ahead of us" he says, getting under the covers and motioning for me to do the same.

"Big day?" I question, not remembering we had something on the agenda this weekend. "I may or may not have planned out our date this morning while you were still in bed Sleeping Beauty" he says, pulling me onto his chest but I sit up pulling away from him with my brows scrunched together.

"How were you so sure I would say yes?" I scoff, shocked by his bold assumption. "From the way I've been making you moan my name I figured you wouldn't mind going on one date with me in return" he says and my jaw drops, throwing the covers off myself and making a break for it but he yanks me back towards him making me flop down on the bed.

"You can't just say things like that" I whine, hands over my eyes as a way to block him out of my vision and hide the very apparent blush that I'm sure is starting to bloom.

"Am I wrong?" he taunts, placing kisses on my neck and collarbone, dangerously close to making me moan his name again.

"You're no fair" I say, pushing him off and giving him my back making him chuckle at my shy behavior. He lays down and pulls me back into him. My back now against his chest and his hand placed on my hip where I'm again reminded that I'm only wearing his shirt and my under ware.

"Keep your hands to yourself Mr." I tease while prying his hand off me. "Come on darling, you know I'm a man of my word. Just sleep, nothing else" he says, this time sliding his hand further up to hold onto my bare waist.

"Fine" I grumble out and he laughs and nuzzles his nose into my neck, taking another deep breath, flooding his senses with my scent.

"Goodnight Bunny" he mumbles against my skin. "Goodnight Daddy I tease and am rewarded with a slap on my ass.

"Did, did you just spank me?" I say trying to wiggle out of his hold but he's already got his arm wrapped around my waist again. "I told you that pretty little mouth of yours was gonna get you into trouble didn't I?" he says, switching to rubbing his hand along the tender flesh he just struck, caressing it in a way to ease the pain.

I pout and settle back into the bed, not dignifying his words with a response. It's only when I accidentally move my hips backwards do I freeze from gaining a soft moan from him, no doubt caught off guard from the contact of my ass up against him.

"Sorry I didn't mean to I-" "I know Bunny, just go to sleep" he says placing a kiss on my neck and holding my hips in place, putting a little more space between us.

As I slow my breathing to a steady one I start to lull myself to sleep but I flinch at the sound of his cute snores in my ear. 'Something I'll have to tease him about in the morning' I giggle to myself and take his hand off my hip, choosing instead to hold it against my chest having him surrounding me. Soon I'm slipping into that dreamland he had drifted off to moments before, safe and warm being in his arms.

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#jungkook fanfic #jungkook #jeon jungkook #bts jungkook #fanfic #fanfiction #kpop #bts #kpop fanfic #jungkook bts #jungkook x reader #jungkook x original character #jungkook x oc #jungkook x y/n #jungkook x you #jungkook and you #jungkook and reader #just take it #jti

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tgcg · 4 months

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ill break your shit adam

warning for adult lang

fuck you adam sandler

youre lucky karkat likes you

stupid fuck sees an amnesiac girl

and asks her can i marry you

that lady got issues mentally

you still down to do shit anally

deplorable zit on the ass of romanza

karkat told me to put that shit in this stanza

do raps even count as having stanzas

slam poetry tyke at preschool im no manza

youd probably jack it to a log with holes if they were wet ones

sitting on that stupid dock with her papa cracking cold ones

piece of shit id push you off that dock and watch you bubbling

kick your ass like her shitty bro failed when you were troubling

penguins dont quack like fucking ducks you dumbass

thats not part of the rap i just think that youre a dumbass

back to the rap sandler i bet you couldnt drop a single bar

too busy picking up stupid women at the stupid women bar

who even let you into hawaii

also did i say karkat liked you i was kidding he wants to kick your heinie

seriously watching that shit again made him start slamming his head into the cushions and screaming i had to pry them out his hands and he almost bit me

sorry i forgot i was rapping again

piece of shit forgot that you can like women while dating other men

still not over that chuck and larry shit adam

if you just said to the gov you were bi you coulda had em

firefighter of the year? well try putting out this heat

karkats gonna beat your ass like you do every night to your meat

gotta ask is this shit wish fulfilment for you

gotta say larry deserved better than you

i could treat him way better than you not in a gay way though

i just mean youre a massive sleaze basically the worlds shittiest bro

back to 50 first dates man sandler your shit is a bore

the stupid bits with schneider got my ass addicted to snore

if i was that stupid walrus id tear your ass to shreds

if i was that penguin i would also tear your ass to shreds

itd be harder but id still do it

bro fuck adam sandler im through it

===

TT: Wow. Bravo, Dave. You've outdone yourself.

TG: i wrote this one exceptionally fucking terrible to represent my inner darkness

TG: i can never unwatch those cinematic fossilized turds theyre like time capsules devoted to everything wrong with america

TG: you dont even understand how egregious that was

TT: I can sense the utter malaise and contempt in every word. It's beautiful.

TT: One particularly interesting point I'd like to make is the fact that you managed to refer to butts in a song about a male target, 10 times in the span of 37 lines. It's not an exorbitant amount, but it appears to be a running theme in your works. Very interesting, if you ask me --

TG: nooooo

TG: nope no

TG: not this shit again

TG: listen one of them is karkats fault

===

CG: ROSE, YOU JUST DON'T FUCKING UNDERSTAND WHAT HE'S DOING HERE AT ALL.

TT: No? Please, enlighten me Karkat.

CG: GLADLY.

CG: HE STARTS OUT WITH THE FRIGGIN WORD "ANAL" PRECEDING ALL OF THE OTHER MENTIONS, OF COURSE IT'S ON PURPOSE. IT INSTILLS THAT IMAGERY IN YOUR NUGBONE THROUGHOUT THE TRACK.

CG: AND YOU MAY HAVE NOTICED A RECURRING USE OF THE WORD "SHIT", IN TANDEM. BOG-STANDARD FOR DAVE, RIGHT? NO! IT'S PART OF THE EFFECT!

CG: MY THESIS: ADAM SANDLER MOVIES ARE PIECES OF ABSOLUTE SHIT AND THE REFERENCES TO WORDS LIKE "LOG" AND "SHIT" AND "ASS" ARE TO INVOKE THE SENSE OF TAKING A MASSIVE DUMP THROUGHOUT THE SPAN OF THE RAP, WHICH BY ALL MEANS WOULD BE AN EQUAL OR GREATER USE OF YOUR TIME THAN WATCHING THOSE MOVIES.

CG: RIGHT, DAVE?

TG: … yeah

TT: Okay, I'm willing to concede to that. On this subject matter, as an avid terrible movie enjoyer, you admittedly know better than myself.

CG: SHOULD KNOW BETTER.

TT: And you love them anyways.

CG: YEAH.

TG: hes right

TG: you hear that shit hes right

TG: fuck death of the author im verifying that interpretation

#davekat #dave strider #karkat vantas #rose lalonde #homestuck #made with instrumentals of ether by nas in mind #posting early bc im impatient #comix

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blackholeunderyourbed · 9 months

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I know that two pieces of media I've seen aren't enough to declare this a trend, but. Gonna call it a trend anyway. I'm seeing a trend in the way closeted characters are treated. Late last April I watched the first season of Heartstopper right after it came out and after my second binge wrote a long post discussing how it treats being in the closet. Tldr; Nick Nelson is the first closeted queer character I've seen that wasn't demonized and in fact affirmed in taking the time he needed, and the show is very explicit and consistent about coming out being a personal choice there's no obligation to make in any particular timeframe. That's a trend that also continued in season two that dropped earlier this month.

I just watched the new Red, White, and Royal Blue movie tonight, not having read the book and being unsure how it would treat Henry once his barriers to coming out were put into focus. I was bracing myself for Henry's reluctance to come out and how he handles his relationship with Alex as a result to default back to the way being closeted is usually framed: cowardly, inauthentic, a burden to one's out partner, and a betrayal of one's self and community. As said above, I have never seen a closeted character not be demonized in one or all of these ways.

I was incredibly surprised and appreciative of how Henry was actually handled, not only because the writing avoided leaning into the demonization aspect, but because it, like in Heartstopper, made an active and conscious effort to do the opposite. There were two primary spots that stood out to me in regard to the movie's messaging around being in the closet.

First was when Alex arrived at the palace to force Henry to talk to him after he disappeared and stopped communicating. During their confrontation, I was waiting for Alex to accuse Henry of being a coward or not choosing him, in doing so downplaying the precarious position Henry was in between his station, family, and how those elements overlap. In direct opposite to my fears, Henry expressed that exact same fear that Alex would call him a coward, only for Alex to directly say he would never call him that.

Even when their emotions are running high, at no point does Alex undermine Henry's feelings or the potential ramifications of him being out. Instead he's empathetic toward him, stressing their ability to choose each other without being out right then. He's willing to be as patient as Henry requires and is the comforting and grounding force Henry needs in that moment. Being out is never a necessity for Alex; it's about loving Henry as much as he can in whatever way he can. This scene is helped by how this scene is built up to, with great emphasis on Henry's conflict, emotions, and stress over doing the best he can for Alex out of love even if it means letting him go.

The other big moment was even more explicit and came in the form of Alex's speech addressing the situation after their emails were leaked. This section could not be more clear, as if was aware of and addressing the exact history of closet framing I was afraid it would perpetuate:

"The truth is, every queer person has the right to come out on their own terms and on their own timeline. They also have the right to choose not to come out at all. The forced conformity of the closet can not be answered with forced conformity in coming out of it. This isn’t about shame."

I'm really pleased with how Red, White, and Royal Blue framed Henry's relationship with the closet. Between that and Heartstopper, perhaps it's not enough to call it a trend, but I hope they represent a beginning of a trend in how the closet is presented. We deserve nuanced portrayals of the subject, especially when the concept of coming out originated as something done between and for queer people, not for the cishet population at large.

Coming out is not owed to anyone: not cishet people, not other queer people, not your partner, and not yourself if it's not your time yet.

#red white and royal blue #rwrb #rwrb movie #rwrb spoilers #rwrb movie spoilers #heartstopper

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meatmensch · 2 months

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Music I think Roy Kent likes and why

Madonna. In season 3, episode 3, Roy said, "[Pre-Madonna] means before Madonna, female vocalists didn't have to work that hard." This implies a great respect for Madonna and her craft. Also, it's an example of a very specific kind of queer guy misogyny that I find very humorous and implicative (of him being queer).

The Sex Pistols (and other punk rock). Two of their songs are in the Ted Lasso soundtrack. One of them specifically plays when Roy is about to do some pundit work for the first time. I think it's meant to be his hype up music. They're also, of course, anti-fascist and anti-monarchy, which I think Roy would vibe with. He's giving punk.

The music of the Muppets. Canonically (not that I necessarily consider this kind of thing canon, lol) a Muppets fan, I think he'd love the soundtracks to the movies, as well as the numbers they do on the original show.

Rap; Salt-n-Pepa, Queen Latifah, and Beyoncé. I just think he would like them. In season 1, episode 6, Keeley mentions that he has rapped, implying at least some interest in the genre.

Leonard Cohen. I think Roy's Jewish, and he's a broody, sensual bitch. It adds up perfectly. Sidenote: while "She's a Rainbow" by the Rolling Stones was a great choice for the song he runs home to football to, I think Cohen's "Ain't No Cure for Love" would've fucking slayyyed..."I loved you for a long, long time / I know this love is real / It don't matter how it all went wrong / That don't change the way I feel / And I can't believe that time is gonna heal / This wound that I'm speaking of" "I've got you like a habit / And I'll never get enough" "I don't need to be forgiven / For loving you so much"

Klezmer. Again, if Roy is Jewish, and we know he loves and misses his grandad...it's simple. He HAS a record player and a dope sound system, and on his shelves there ARE old klezmer records that he remembers dancing around to with his grandad in their old flat.

Amy Winehouse. Again, if Roy is Jewish, and we know he is broody and bitchy, it is a given. "Rehab" is his anthem when his knee gets bad and he is reluctant to treat it.

Disco; Donna Summer and Jessie Ware. It's just great workout music, and it slays, and if he's queer, well, yes, of course he likes disco.

Pop rock; Elton John and Queen. If he's queer...it's a given. I think he particularly likes "I Think I'm Going to Kill Myself" and "Rocket Man", as he is suicidal (I can't find the interview where Goldstein said this) (it's just Word of God anyway), and the most rocket man motherfucker ever.

The music of the people he loves; Led Zeppelin, Cream, Tina Turner, and Stevie Nicks. Phoebe, Keeley, and Jamie like these musicians. He's a caring uncle, boyfriend, and friend. He is listening and learning. Also, I think Phoebe would be into some weird stuff, like outsider music - maybe some Tiny Tim. I think Roy would also enjoy the music of other friends, from plenty of other genres.

#also. i rly disagree w the term outsider music but it gets the point across so yknow.#also i have this hc that he plays the drums bc his sister wanted to play music at some point and he was like ok i will play toys w u fine.#and she plays guitar :)#my posts #ted lasso #i also think he is maybe one of those celebrities who is multidisciplinary. so yes he has released a few eps. under a pseudonym ofc #then again i kinda think he's one of those guys who is really good at one thing and THINKS they suck at everything else. so like he happens #to play music around people every once in a while and they're like whatttt u r amazing? and he's like shut up i'm garbage. yeah #I ALSO THINK ROY IS RLY INTO BASEBALL. why? um. if u ask him he'll say some shit like 'i'm a fucking athlete ofc i follow other sports. no #it's not weird that it's not a very british thing. get the fuck out of my face.' the real answer is he watch a league of their own as a kid #purely for madonna and a special interest was born #inspired #roy kent #also! jamie is a HUGE music snob. i just know this to be true #like. the only musicians we've heard him mention (i think) are tina turner and stevie nicks. whenever roy grabs the aux and bumps madonna o #any music from this century he resists the urge to reach over and strangle him

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surplus-of-sarcasm · 10 months

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The 24th One

TW: Blood, guns, attempted murder, fear, pain, stitches, painful wound cleaning, emotional breakdown, threats, slightly flirtatious drama queen villain, male whumpee

"Take it easy," a firm, but somehow saccharine voice called out from Civilian's living room.

Treading lightly and letting out an involuntary sharp gasp, her gaze flitted over to a figure mostly hidden by the shadows, like a charcoal drawing, the first rays of the sun peeking through the sheer, half-open curtain outlining his edges.

"Who are you?" she questioned, going back into her room to fetch a gun from the safe.

She tiptoed into the room, fingers tightening on the weapon as she flicked off the safety.

Civilian was met with a soft, amused chuckle. "I thought the spandex would be telling," the man she now identified as Villain replied, practically slouching in her armchair like he owned the place.

Her breathing went shallower, and her face paled. The all-too-happy figure in a dark, form-fitting suit with heavily mussed up light brown hair lounging around in her living room was one of the city's most dangerous criminals. And she was all alone with him and a gun she barely used. She wished to curse the fact that she'd chosen to live somewhere quiet, right on the outskirts, closer to her job. It didn't seem all too convenient now, did it?

"I'm gonna need you to put that down, love," the villain crooned, voice gentle and silky, but the hint of warning in it wasn't lost on her, much like a rose with thorns scattered across its stalk in a subtle manner, but still not invisible to the keen eye.

"And why should I do that?" she challenged, strengthening her death grip on the gun, defiance ablaze in her eyes. She wished she was as brave as she might have looked.

Except that didn't matter because the criminal seemed entirely amused with the situation, raising an eyebrow and letting out a soft laugh, greyish blue eyes sparkling in the sunlight with mirth. "Ah, as much as I admire the courage, I'm not in the mood for any games, so put the gun down and don't even think about calling the police. Not that it would save you anyway," he growled. The playfulness was still there in his demeanour, but he didn't make an effort to mask the threatening air of his tone.

"I hope you don't think I'm joking," he drawled lazily, pulling out a gun of his own and training it on Civilian's face.

"No," she stage-whispered, trying to ignore the nausea washing over her and the tightness in her chest. She mentally cursed herself for not shooting him the second she'd recognised him.

But killing people was not like the movies. It isn't something you walk away from, something a good night's sleep, if you could even afford such a luxury, would help you forget. Only truly terrible people, like the villain in her armchair, she presumed, could treat murder as a mundane part of their daily routine, like how one regards brushing their teeth.

But now, she didn't hold an inkling of power on the crime lord because while the civilian might hesitate, might back out completely, he wouldn't.

And besides, he had goddamn superpowers at his disposal; he could create wind. She would have to be extremely lucky to get a hit on him, and that was never something she was willing to gamble over when it came to her life.

She pried for any weaknesses, anything to use against the villain, but all she saw was a calm, almost relaxed person and a deadly weapon in his merciless grip.

"You know I really didn't want to do this. In all honesty, it's been a while since I've seen a girl this cute," he supplied, and if she didn’t know better, Civilian would've sworn he actually sounded disappointed, "but I don't like having to repeat myself," he concluded, a slight downturn of his lip being the only indication of any negative emotion he may have felt, with nothing behind those cold, steel-coloured eyes.

He rose up from the chair, and panic gripped the civilian. Both of them shot and missed, except the villain cried out, letting out a sharp gasp as he fell to the floor, holding onto the chair's leg like a lifeline. His gun was hurled across the room with a loud clattering noise, far away from his grip. A nasty laceration across his his abdomen spurted out blood.

She wondered how he'd gotten hurt if no bullets had hit him, and when the sunlight moved further into the room, she noticed that he'd popped some poorly executed stitches with his sudden movements. He tried to use his powers to pull his gun closer but to no avail. The pathetic, little breeze he'd created could barely move a leaf. Apparently, his injury had affected his power tremendously.

For a moment there, Villain looked terrified. Frantically groping around for his gun, looking two seconds away from howling out in agony as he moved as fast as his injured body could handle. There were bruises on his face, no doubt from a previous fight, and his eyes were wide as saucers, his breathing laboured. He was now at Civilian's mercy, and he knew it. This was his end, no way around it. For a man the heroes said claimed to 'dance with death', he seemed incredibly frightened of it. For the first time that night, he looked unbearably human.

She didn't understand why some sort of misguided empathy had led her to crouch down to his level and ask, "Can you walk?"

"What?" he choked out, snapping his head up sharply at her. And as though the fear from before had never been, he clenched his jaw, contracted the muscles in his face to pull it into something stone-hard and expressionless, trying his hardest to pull his form up into a semi-standing position, holding onto the coffee table with a white-knuckled grip. He tried again for his powers, but they failed him once more. Still, she could see the hint of wariness in his eyes as his gaze trailed over to her gun.

She got up and threw it aside. "Goddamn it," she snarled, drawing in a sharp breath and exhaling slowly. Well, if she died for being foolhardy, at least it would be a noble death. However, she'd made sure to keep both guns in her room. No more chances.

The villain's eyes widened again, not out of fear, but out of shock, clearly not being used to any displays of kindness. She walked over to him, letting him put his arm around her shoulders, struggling to shoulder his weight. He was incredibly tall, lean muscles outlined by his suit. The civilian finally managed to get him over to the couch. "I'm a med school student, final year," she supplied, and he let out an overly exaggerated sigh of relief.

She would've smirked, but she caught herself. Don't get too familiar. "Friendly reminder that I don't have any anaesthesia on hand right now."

He simply responded with a scoff, rolling his eyes at her.

"Alright tough guy, how would you rate your pain on a scale of one to ten?" she asked, looking for a needle, thread and some antiseptic.

"Seven," he answered coolly. It still surprised her how he managed to preserve his composure while wounded like this, no wincing or shivers. But she reminded herself again that he was not a normal person.

Civilian unzipped the suit down to his abdomen, and the villain gave her an unbearably cocky grin, somehow managing to do that with blood snaking down from the ugly laceration on his body.

"Don't flatter yourself," she scolded, and she didn't understand why she'd said that, as though they were old friends used to exchanges full of banter. The civilian wondered if she'd become so secluded and terribly lonely that human interaction with anyone seemed appealing to her.

"Don't flatter me yourself with those eyes, love- ahggg!" The velvety tone and the lazy, half-lidded gaze were swiftly replaced with a sharp hiss as the villain squeezed his eyes shut, contracting and relaxing his muscles rhythmically to distract himself from the agonising sensation of the alcohol seeping into his wound, leaving his skin feeling like it was on fire.

"Easy, it'll be over soon," Civilian soothed awkwardly, unable to conceal the pang of sympathy she felt for him right now.

"Don't coddle me," he snapped, clearly more concerned with his wounded ego above anything else. Even beneath the smug smiles and stoicism, he clearly loathed the vulnerability. He hadn't been afraid of dying, she realised; he was afraid of dying in such a humiliating state.

Tragically poetic how he had the words 'Pride is my sin' tattooed on his right arm in all capitals, dark ink and a stylish font.

The civilian got him through the stitches, years of intensive studying and practice overriding her nervousness, stopping her hands from shaking the way they desperately wished to. Villain barely shivered or flinched during the process, and while he raised a sceptical eyebrow at her when she offered him a glass of water and painkillers, he swallowed them readily.

She washed her hands and threw him an icepack for the swollen bruises.

"I'm going to get ready for bed, and you should be uh, fine here," she supplied, gesturing to the couch with one hand as she zipped up the criminal's suit with the other.

"I guess this means I owe you a favour," he stated bluntly, a thoughtful, enigmatic look in his steely eyes.

"What?"

"I'm a crime lord, but that doesn't mean I'm a complete bastard," he reasoned, "you didn't kill me even when you had the chance. It's only fair."

"Why would I need a favour from you of all people?" She raised an eyebrow at him, moving a strand of ash blonde, wavy hair away from her eyes.

"In this city, you'll never know when you might need a favour from a guy like me. Anyway, take care of yourself, love." He sounded genuinely concerned, and the civilian hated it, so she awkwardly nodded at him.

When she got into the shower, finally away from the villain, her emotions came crashing down on her shoulders like solid rock. Her brave face in front of the villain had been a facade. She was terrified, incredibly guilty, all of the worst outcomes tormenting her mind in flurries of terrible thoughts. Try as she might, she couldn't stop the tears from streaming down her face. There was no going back now.

Civilian may have preferred to stay awake after sunrise, but she was too exhausted. Or actually, she wished to escape her hellish thoughts, and this was the fastest and easiest way to free herself from her shackles.

We all dream of being kind, of offering help to those in need, yet in an imperfect world, acts of kindness come with an expensive price, one not everyone is willing to pay. This hour's enemy is the next hour's victim, today's proud and cruel are tomorrow's weak and defenceless. But the beautiful irony of life is that no matter how far one runs away from it, vulnerability is a destined fate, written in stone, an unavoidable risk. It is the one thing in a person's nature that marks a human being as such.

Almost forgot, tagging for comfort fics: @roblingoblin285

✨️Le Taglist: @larinzz @syberianjade @lateuplight @altu-interactions @enbious-prince @astr0-mj @thelazywitchphotographer @a-fucking-simp-00 @addictedsandwhichaki @justalittlecorrupted @quaggasus @theangstyclown @vernilliom @mothmancommitsarson @starssabove @kurai-hono-blog @talkingsperm @muffinrebel44 @sunnynwanda @annablogsposts @cardboardarsonist @itsmyworld23 @onlywhump @shr3ya @crotchgoblin69 @wtfevenisausername @pendarling @avloki-pal

Wanna be on the taglist? This'll take you there!

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spacecluster · 9 months

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I've got something to share about the Barbie movie that I should probably be sharing with a therapist but I don't have one so it's going here instead

I've been seeing so many posts on Tumblr tiktok and on Instagram and just really everywhere about the Barbie movie and how amazing it was, and don't get me wrong I'm not about to say that the Barbie movie is not amazing because it genuinely is. it is genuinely such an amazing movie. what's bothering me is all of the posts of these girls who are like "I miss being a little girl I want to go back to being a little girl" and I was just like watching one of these posts and I was thinking to myself 'God what I would give to be 5 years old again and how much more would I cherish it knowing what I know now, knowing that I don't get to go back' and then I stopped

And I thought to myself

'Okay but lilly,

You don't get to go back

Time as you perceive it

Will only ever move

Forward.

You never get to go back but you're spending all of this time now wishing that you could go back.'

Why are you doing this to yourself? why are you treating the past like it's some wonderful thing and the present has absolutely no potential because you're looking at the past with this lens - and I'm still talking to myself here when I say you - you're looking at the past with this lens of "I would change this if I could go back. I wouldn't waste my time on this. I would do this instead if I could go back to being five." but like

You don't.

You don't ever get to go back. And doesn't that make the present so much better? The gift of the present is knowing what has already happened in the past and being able to look forward to the future, which, as I'm saying it, is kind of the point that I noticed in the Barbie movie now that I'm thinking about it.

And the thing is, I'm spending my twenties wishing I could go back to my teens and I spent my teens wishing I could go back to being a small child. I don't want to be 30 and wishing I could go back to 20 and change all the stuff. Why would I want that when I could just stop living for my teenage self and start living for my 20 year old self so that my 30 year old self has permission and has the time and has the mental space to live for herself because all of the time and the mental space and the energy isn't being stuck on nostalgia and wishing that I had done this that or the other because right now I have the power to choose this side or the other I mean I'm only 22 for fuck sake why why spend another 10 years wasting the time that I have now wishing that I hadn't wasted the time that I had before so that when I get older so that later I just have to waste that time wishing that I had spent this time better

Sorry I'm using text to speech to type this right now but I'm I'm actually I'm going to go out and do something tomorrow. I'm going to go out and do something that I've always wanted to do I don't know what yet maybe. I'm going to go and watch a movie by myself all by myself on my own. I already jumped in a pool fully clothed today cross that off the bucket list. I'm going to go to a movie by myself do I have the money for it? no. do I have a job to recoup money for it? no. am I going to do it anyway? yeah because I only get to be 22 once and then I'll be 23 and I don't want to spend 23 wishing that 22 had been different when I could just make it different now

Oh my God the Barbie movie is so good

Anyway if anyone wants to give me like. A dollar? I guess? Hit me up? Idk it's 3 am I'm gonna go fold my clothes now goodnight

#barbie #the barbie movie #god i need therapy

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bitchesgetriches · 1 year

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hey glorious Bitches, I've had a wild year. Had a mental breakdown in Jan that forced me to leave my after-school teacher job ($21/hr). Ended up working for Kroger ($18.50/hr). Worst few months of work I've had in over a decade, possibly my entire life. And that's before even discussing the low wages. Radicalized me even more than I was before. Anyways, got a new job, doing the same kind of teaching as in my old job, but it pays around $30/hr. Most I've ever made in my life. First time I actually have "extra" money. Like I can go to a restaurant or a movie or buy myself some new jeans. and still have money leftover. Surprisingly, that first week I was really kind of... depressed about it. Going back to a desk job where I'm suddenly treated with human dignity, and now making a solid middle-class wage, just really reinforced in me how much the economy is bullshit, how much it exploits people financially and psychologically. The hardest working people are paid nothing while the highest paid people are often doing close to nothing. Anyways, I'm gonna avoid spending all this new money. Gonna make an emergency fund and actually try to save money to retire one day (maybe?). And def gonna find more ways to give back to the community. I'm already tipping better, bc every front-end worker is underpaid. And I try to buy something like a box of cookies which I give to the grocery workers when I leave. (I'd tip them if not that management would punish them for it.) Anyways, I'm lucky now with my lower middle class job and some human dignity. I'm super lucky actually. I just wish everyone knew how much of a scam our economy is, that capitalism is. Everyone deserves a living wage and dignity. treat people well. if you can afford it, tip well. everyone is struggling. ok, that's my weird little rant. thanks for listening and for putting out actually good financial/economic content.

"Weird little rant"? More like "SPEAKING THE TRUTH."

Honey we are SO proud of you for making this kind of progress in your career and life while still keeping your soul intact. Far too many people who reach financial stability completely forget what it's like to be one of the working poor. The "I got mine" mentality is too common in our capitalist society. We must never forget where we came from and how many people get left behind.

You're doing great and we're overjoyed for you. Keep it up, cutie pie.

Raising the Minimum Wage Would Make All Our Lives Better

Barbara Sloan's New Book Dares To Suggest Service Industry Professionals Deserve Financial Stability Too

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mooifyourecows · 5 months

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I love the humor of your fics! I've genuinely never read a story that does it's humor so well and even after multiple rereads I find myself laughing out loud reading Open Tab for example. What tips would you give for writers who are trying to incorporate humor into the story without it being corny?

Hey, sorry for the late reply, i've been really busy lately with the holidays, womp womp 🥲

My advice is: embrace the corny. Every joke I've made will someday (if not already) be corny to somebody. Some of them have become corny even to me. But that's okay. Corny is good. Corny is funny too. Life is too short to be embarrassed about your writing. Embrace corny.

And what makes you laugh the first time might not make you laugh the fifth time. That doesn't mean it wasn't funny the first four times, right? There are tons of jokes I read back on now and I'm like "oh GOD that's lame" but when i wrote it, and when people first read it, it was HILARIOUS. Humor just wears off a little the more you expect and remember it. I mean sure, there are always going to be those jokes that you think are ALWAYS funny, but they're probably not always funny to other people. They might not have been funny ever at all for some people.

All that matters is if YOU think it's funny. Make YOURSELF laugh and giggle and snort over your stupid, corny jokes. That's what I do. I write something, and if it makes me laugh, I know it'll make someone else laugh. Maybe only one other person, but hey, me and that person are the only people in the world with taste anyway so, bombs away. Don't play to an audience unless you're trying to sell something. Play to yourself and you'll attract like minded people and those are the BEST people to have as your readers. They'll love and support you more than your own dang mom.

And then of course the usual advice i give to people about writing comedy is to consume comedy. Watch some shows/movies or read some books/comics that you personally find hilarious. Really pay attention to why they're funny. If you have to, pause and really break a joke down. Even take notes if that's helpful. Basically treat it like you're about to write a deep dive essay on why you laughed. I know it might seem unfun, explaining the joke, but if you understand comedy, you'll have an easier time writing it. Pay attention to word usage, timing, physical gags, silence, etc. It's all important. But don't be afraid to play around! Comedy is like any art and is meant to be creative and unique to every individual. There are some things out there that people find funny that I can't even pretend to laugh at. And that's okay! It's about taste. Find what you like and try it on.

Personally, I like witty banter. I like humor that is a little surprising and over the top. I like when something is so dumb that you can't help but laugh about it. I like funny characters AND funny situations, but especially funny characters in funny situations. So these are the things I try to include in my writing.

But I also really enjoy contrast, so I like to pair humor with other stuff. Sweet romance, deep emotions, sad drama, etc. If you try to be funny and only funny all the time, you're gonna come off a little desperate and the jokes will fall flat. Ever watch a long running show and have to suffer watching it slowly get less and less funny as the seasons go by because all the nuance is gradually replaced with signature character traits recycled again and again and again until every character is a husk of their former selves? That's what it feels like when you focus too hard on making everything funny. You lose the soul of the writing.

Really pay attention to the things you find funny and try and emulate that same energy. Don't use the same jokes, of course, but try and capture the general vibe of the humor in a way that suits your story/writing style. A lot of the stuff I like to consume is witty banter/outlandish situations/crass euphemisms/puns so those are the things i like to put into my own stories. And hey, sometimes it doesn't work. I've written jokes that make me laugh until I cry but nobody seems to feel the same way and HEY, that's alright. I like it. And liking the stuff you're doing is the most important thing in the end.

Anyway, I hope this is helpful in some way. If you ever want any more advice, feel free to shoot me another ask! I'll try my best 👍

Good luck! Sending you good funny vibes for your adventures into comedic writing 🌈

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practically-an-x-man · 3 months

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A BUNCH of questions for Kat please?

Appearances: 6, 15

Objects: 2, 4, 14

Food and Drink: 3, 15, 16

Weather/Nature: 4, 15, 16

Community/Relationships: 1, 5, 10, 20

Mind/Body/Soul: 8, 14

Hobbies: 10, 16, 18

Ahhhh thank you so much!! This will be a lot of fun!

Under the cut for space

Super Long Hopefully Fun OC Asks

Appearances

6. How much interest does your character take in trends?

Not much. Mainly, she just doesn't have the budget to keep up with trendy clothing or makeup - she'd rather spend that money on art supplies.

15. Would your character wear something someone else picked out for them?

It depends on who picked it out. She of course trusts Jace, Emily, and Ahk and wouldn't hesitate to try out something they picked (though Ahk's tastes may be a little antiquated). Others, it kind of depends. She's not picky about clothing, but she's kind of curvy and it can be embarrassing for someone else to pick out an outfit only for it not to fit... she'd rather shop for herself

____

Objects

2. What gift would your character give to someone they didn't like but felt obligated to?

She'd try to still put some thought into it and tailor it to their personality, but she'd stick to something easy like a gift card, or a book/movie in their preferred genre.

4. Is there an item your character liked that they can’t get back?

She's always a little sad when art companies change the formulas of their products (goodbye, Dandelion Yellow...), especially since her choices are either to hoard what she has left of the old formula and never use it or to use it anyway and lament when it's finally gone.

14. Is there an item your character is embarrassed they own or want?

I think she'd realllly want to try out some of those trendy gimmicky art products, knowing they're stupid but wanting to try them out of curiosity anyway.

___

Food and Drink

3. Is there a food or drink your character is unwilling to try?

Not that I can think of. There's foods she dislikes for sure, but she'd try anything once.

15. What food or drink does your character consider a treat?

Tiramisu and a latte from her favorite Italian bakery! It's her go-to "finished a big project and I'm gonna treat myself" prize

16. Is there a food texture your character doesn't like?

Look. She's a Southern gal through and through. But grits have to be a very certain texture for her to enjoy them, otherwise they just feel strange and a little slimy.

____

Weather and Nature

4. Is there a natural phenomenon that scares your character?

I think she always gets a little wary of tornadoes. She's seen them do some damage, though thankfully not to her own home.

15. Is there a creature that scares your character?

She's got a healthy appreciation for venomous snakes. And she gets freaked the fuck out by ticks - she's the one loading up with bug spray every time she'll be out in nature, because if she has to get a tick off of herself she might cry.

16. What celestial body would interest your character the most?

Not one particular celestial body, but she likes linking astronomy with history. The star Antares representing the goddes Serket, Polaris and Sirius and their historical significance, how stars are translated differently by cultures... she finds it fascinating and beautiful

____

Community and Relationships

Does your character prefer company or solitude when sick?

Company, for sure. She'll never ask, but she loves being taken care of at times like that

5. Who would your character first seek if they needed medical help?

....a hospital. None of her friends are really skilled with medicine, so she'd rather be safe than sorry (the closest would be Jace, as a tattoo artist, but that's still iffy)

10. Is there a habit your character has that they learned from someone else?

I feel like she's started to adopt Ahk's regal posture when she needs to do something intimidating (like talking with McPhee, or doing midterm evaluations with her instructors). She doesn't even realize she does it, but she sort of pulls herself up the same way he does.

20. What would it take for your character to get into a fight?

It would take a lot for her to get into a real, physical fight, but if someone were posing a genuine threat to one of her friends, she'd be the first to jump to their defense.

____

Mind, Body, and Soul

8. What scents does your character find comforting?

She loves the smell of old parchment. She associates it with Ahk, for one, but it's also a very nostalgic smell for her and reminds her of wandering the aisles of her local library as a kid

14. Is there a secret thing your character longs to hear?

She wants to hear that she'll be remembered. Not in the sense that she'll be famous, but she wants to hear someone say that one of her art pieces moved them, and so there will be a piece of her that will always stay with them

____

Hobbies and Activities

10. Is there a skill your character doesn’t know they’re bad at?

She doesn't realize how many insecurities she still holds onto. She's gotten a lot better about that, but there are some things she still hasn't fully let go of and she doesn't entirely realize it

16. What’s an activity that reminds your character of someone else?

Cooking always reminds her of her mother and her grandmother, since they would cook together every night.

18. What is a topic your character wouldn't want to talk about?

She doesn't really like talking about the future. For one thing, it's so uncertain, especially in an art-based career - she doesn't know what opportunities will or will not pop up for her. And for another, there's always some difficult thoughts about the future, particularly in how her life will move on but the museum will stay constant.

#my friends!!!#answered asks #ask game #my ocs #oc katherine johnson

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a-trick-or-two-with-lepers · 1 year

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Jesus Christ Superstar Live in Concert (NBC 2018) Breakdown and Review

Quick disclaimer: This is the second version of JCS that I've seen in full. I was introduced to the rock opera through the 1973 movie, and I'm not afraid to say that that is where my bias will always be, especially considering I'm more of a film buff than a theater nerd. However, I am aware that putting a feature-length film and a live recording of a performance on the same level for criticism is unfair, so I'll try to keep the comparisons to a minimum.

With that out of the way, here are my (slightly deranged) thoughts on NBC's JCS Live!

~Overture~

I can only imagine how hyped JCS enjoyers got while watching this live back in 2018. Not only is the live orchestra doing an amazing job, but the guitar players get their own time to shine on stage! This is so damn cool to see, because the guitar riffs are really what makes the song. When the "Heaven on Their Minds" riff began and we got to see one of the guitarists on stage just going at it, I knew I'd be in for a treat.

I'd like to take a moment to talk about the set design as well. One thing I know to be true about most JCS productions is that the set is almost always bare-bones - but in a meaningful way. The story relies more on the actions and emotions of its characters than the environment, which makes sense as Jesus and his compatriots were not necessarily wealthy. This remains true for this particular production. The staging is really impressive; you're never short of something or someone to look at.

Also... the outfits! I'm a sucker for leather, and this production has no shortage of it. The costumes, while aesthetically pleasing, show how much the ensemble in this play favor rebellion.

I love when casts are as diverse as possible - in ethnicity, skin color, body types, gender presentation, etc. This cast fits the bill, and everyone does a fantastic job in the overture. In fact, the ensemble this cast provides are just amazing in general. You can tell each and every one of them has oodles of experience under their belt. I have no complaints about any of their performances.

I will say, the flashing lights during the more chaotic bits were a bit much for me, but that's more due to my propensity to get overstimulated. Overall, the choices made in this section were top-notch, and I really can't be mad at any of it.

Enter: John Legend.

You know how I was really digging the costuming? Well...

Look, I understand that most productions have Jesus just looking like a normal ass dude with normal ass clothing, but was the grey shawl really necessary? Whatever, I'm not too put out by it. At least we get to see some John Legend tiddy.

It occurred to me during this part of the play that I am not a fan of live audiences. Once again, my easily overstimulated brain may be to blame, but I found myself wishing for most of the play that the audience would just quiet down. Nevertheless, I'm sure the cast was happy to be so outwardly appreciated.

~Heaven on Their Minds~

youtube

I'm gonna say this once and I won't say it again. THE MARKETING TEAM LEFT BRANDON VICTOR DIXON IN THE GODDAMN DUST. Seriously, every time I came across a video of this production on Youtube, his name was either not in the title, not in the thumbnail, or he was labeled as Tim Minchin. The poor guy is the main fucking character and nobody could be bothered to give him the credit he deserves. I understand that Legend is more famous, but seriously. That just rubs me the wrong way.

Anyway...

I'm back to loving the costuming. Judas' vest is so cool, and I love the symbolism of his tank being red. Honestly, any Judas in red has my heart immediately.

His performance here is good, but nothing I'm overly impressed by. I can understand wanting to save energy for later performances, though, and I'm definitely not offended by Dixon's singing. He's a bit stilted in his delivery, a little nasally in his vocals, and I sometimes have a hard time believing his performance. Though, I can imagine it's kind of hard to stay in character when you're struggling to be heard above the audience. I mean seriously! When Jesus did the bit where he reached out to the audience, the crowd got so loud that if I didn't know the lyrics to this song by heart I wouldn't know what Dixon was saying. It made me a bit mad, to be honest. I don't know, maybe that in itself is symbolic or some shit.

I do like Dixon's phrasing in some parts, especially when he sing-speaks the line "do you care for your race?" as well his sassy delivery of the titular line. I did not care for the way he sang "how put down we are," but he later totally nailed the original riff on "sour," which is one of my favorite vocal runs of all time. The way he interspersed the bits where he wasn't singing with spoken complaints was cute. He also did a really nice break at the "puh-LEASE" bit.

He really made the song his own. The last twenty seconds gave me chills. Dixon is clearly a very skilled performer, and though there were parts of his performance I didn't love, I overall really enjoyed watching him sing one of my favorite musical numbers.

One last thing about this part: I don't really like how Judas is singing directly to Jesus. A big part of Judas' characterization is that he is a sort of outcast-loner type, and his relationship with Jesus fails mainly because both men fail to communicate effectively. When Judas is literally expressing his concerns directly to Jesus, and Jesus outright ignores him, it makes Jesus come across as an unresponsive dick. Again, this is the first theater JCS I've seen, so I'm not sure how much of this is written in stone as part of the Broadway production. Instead of doing the right thing and researching that, I'm just going to judge the play based on how I initially responded to it.

~What's the Buzz / Strange Thing Mystifying~

I'm not sure if this is a constant in most JCS productions, but "What's the Buzz" feels too slow to me. It's a bit jumpier in the '73 version, but that may be because they were recording it in a studio rather than in front of a live audience. I will say, there's not much room for breathing in this song. Once again, though, the ensemble is doing a banger job.

I came into this not really having a strong opinion on John Legend. I really only know the one song from him ("All of Me," obviously). I've heard people criticize his performance in this, and while I'd much prefer a rock singer or seasoned Broadway performer in this role, I can't say I'm too offended by his casting. He's more focused on his voice than his acting. When it comes to musical theater, each line should be treated as its own and should portray a slightly different emotional tone. With Legend, all his lines kind of sound the same and seem to hold the same level of importance. He's also not very good at the kind of talk-singing that is usually present in this role. But, I can't deny that he sounds pretty damn good. I especially liked how he sang "Mary, oooh, that is good." Very sexy indeed.

Speaking of Mary! Who doesn't love Sara Bareilles? (No seriously, who? I just wanna talk...) I really really really love her dress, and her voice is just lovely. Very soothing and unassuming.

When Judas comes in for "Strange Thing Mystifying," he is once again portraying the perfect amount of sass and shade. I really missed the "hey cool it man :(" line from Simon, though. It's so adorable in the '73 JCS.

I really liked Legend's staccato "Who. Are. You." parts! Whoever made the decision to direct him like that knew what they were doing.

All around, there was more singing than acting going on from the main cast. In my opinion, this makes the characterization kind of weak, but it doesn't make the songs unenjoyable.

Also, I love the choreography here! Especially when they sing "when do we ride into Jerusalem?" Still can't top the '73 choreo for me, but that's a very high bar.

~Everything's Alright~

While I absolutely adore Sara Bareilles' voice, I wish she enunciated a bit more for this song, but that's just a personal preference. Her singing and her entire vibe is just so calming and gorgeous, and her runs are spot-on. Then we get to the little Judas and Jesus interaction.

In the original movie, this is the scene that made me realize, "Wow. These men really love each other." Every scene with Carl Anderson and Ted Neely is just so emotionally intense that it's impossible to look away. That is not really the case with Legend and Dixon.

Though they both sound good (for the most part), the desperation and emotional overflow is just not there. And I say for the most part because both Dixon and Legend struggle a bit with the higher notes. Dixon went for the belt, but was a bit flat. Legend opted to sing "when I'm gone" with a poorly sung falsetto, and it just. Does not fit. Whatsoever. It was a weak performance of a line that is meant to be fraught with emotion.

Also, by the end of the song, I'm pretty sure the point is supposed to be that despite Mary's careful ministrations, Jesus is still stressed and upset. But here? Nah, Jesus is just snoozin'.

Despite J and J's subpar deliveries, I enjoyed this song even if just for how Mary was presented.

~This Jesus Must Die~

Norm Lewis! I! Don't really... have a pre-formed opinion on him. So many people seem to, but I just haven't been involved in theater for so long that I'm a bit out of the loop.

Nonetheless, he is a wonderful performer. His vibrato is liquid gold. However, I was under the impression that Caiaphas is a role usually played by bass singers. Lewis is very clearly a baritone. I'm not sure I'm too happy with this choice, especially since he seems to struggle a bit with the lower notes. It's not nearly as noticeable as Legend's struggle with high notes, but I really wish we got to have a beautiful, gravelly bass voice in this role. Even without the inhumanly low tones, Lewis manages to make this role just as intimidating as it should be.

Jin Ha does a good job as Annas. I don't have much to say about his performance.

What I find particularly funny about this part is that you can tell who the stage performers are. Legend is a singer. He sings. These priests that have like, two lines each? They're PERFORMERS. They are taking their fifteen seconds of fame and milking them as much as possible, and I respect the hell out of it because it makes for some very enjoyable performances. The "What then to do about this Jesusmania?" guy killed it.

I love the costuming here as well - very cool geometric designs on the jackets.

Though I would love to say I fancied this version of the song, they didn't include the "Jesus is cool" line. And for that, this is my least favorite song in the production. (/j)

~Hosanna~

I don't have a whole lot to say about this one. It was good! Just a few little tidbits:

-Legend starting a crowd clap was cute

-This song works really well for Legend cause it's right in his register and he doesn't have to reach for any super high notes

-The key change is super cool! I LOVE Legend's runs during this part as well

-The last part where they all sing "SUPERSTAAAAR" was awesome and I can imagine them using that for a lot of cable advertisements

~Simon Zealotes / Poor Jerusalem~

First of all: Simon's cute as hell! Look at his lil' hair!

I just love when this role is played as the most energetic, chaotic, batshit insane guy you've ever seen. And I cannot express how delighted I am to see a role in this play being done by a rock singer! Erik Grönwell's performance here is my favorite out of anyone in this play so far. His belts are out of this world.

The ensemble can't be discounted here either, 'cause they sound freaking amazing. But I've already expressed my love for them.

Surprisingly, Legend's falsetto actually works well for "Poor Jerusalem." It makes sense, though, as this part is meant to be a bit gentler and more downtrodden. He sounds really nice.

Side note: when did they change the "but you close your eyes" line to "but you live a lie?" Is that just for this version or was it changed previously? I feel like it doesn't really add anything.

~Pilate's Dream~

Not much to say here either, it's a pretty short song. I will say I really like Pilate's outfit. The colors are reminiscent of '73 version, which is an immediate like from me. I also like how Pilate looked straight into the camera at the end of the song. Pretty impactful even if I know for a fact they went to commercial break right after that.

~The Temple~

Okay. I'd die for these guitarists. I love whenever they're on stage! They're killing it!

Anyway, I found it pretty funny that the temple-goers just started dumping glitter on the ground. I wrote in my notes "Slay ig," so, slay ig.

It's pretty cool too how the "temple" is literally just a huge cross on the ground. The slow movement of the camera makes this a languid realization, which is neat.

Speaking of which, I forgot to mention that the camerawork so far has been really good. I never feel like I'm watching something stagnant, yet I still feel like a part of the audience. Good job, NBC crew.

"My temple should be a house of prayer, but you have made it a den of thieves" is my favorite part of the original movie. It's so undeniably powerful, and Neely's rock-belt is just heavenly to listen to. (He performs it live, too, so I know it isn't just a trick of the recording studio).

Legend's version of this line? Eh, it was alright. It was honestly better than I was expecting. I was really worried he was just gonna sing it the way it was written and go for the falsetto, but he instead chose to stay in his range. He also has an intentional voice break, indicating a bit of emotion, which is nice to see. I don't know why he sings the "get outs" in lowercase; it's just kind of funny.

The lepers sound really good, but when Legend is trying to sing his part over them, I can hardly hear him. What I did hear, though, was like? Really good? Super rock-sounding. Hopefully we hear more of that later...

~I Don't Know How to Love Him~

No notes. She slayed.

Yvonne Elliman supremacy, but Sara Bareilles Mary Magdalene now has a place in my heart. I'm glad I watched this production if just for her, honestly.

~Damned for all Time / Blood Money~

What can I say? The priests are spooky, the lighting is badass, and Norm Lewis is the best singer here.

As far as Judas goes, Dixon is doing exceedingly well for how ridiculously hard this song is to sing. Carl Anderson owns this song in my heart, but Dixon is not disappointing. He makes up for the lack of insane belting by adding his own runs, and it works well. I wrote in my notes that "Brandon actually looks like emotions are happening," so, yeah. Also, the BICEPS! Needless to say, I was enjoying it.

~The Last Supper~

I forgot why I wrote "Aw, gay apostles" in my notes, but going back to it, I noticed how much hugging kissing was going on between these guys. Can't complain, love a good smooch.

Mary is also in this scene, which differs from the movie. And she shows her hospitality towards Judas, which is cute. I always wished they had Judas and Mary interact more in the movie.

Legend sounds good at the beginning. Once again, this song is well within his range, and his falsettos don't feel too out of place. However, they didn't put a pause between the "when you eat and drink" line and the "I must be mad" line, which I thought was odd.

When the accusations start flying, Jesus just. Doesn't seem mad. Judas does, and Dixon completely upstages Legend in this scene.

After the apostles sing a second time, and Judas starts dishing out the insults to Jesus, I feel like it should have been more one-on-one and personal. I would've had the apostles move further away or even leave the stage for this part.

Oof. Legend singing "Get out!" in falsetto was just... not good. When the audience clapped for it I cringed so hard.

Let's see if Legend can redeem himself with the next song...

~Gethsemane~

With how bad everyone made it out to be, I was expecting Legend to completely biff it here. But to my surprise, he really stepped it up here, in both terms of singing and acting. Obviously, it was nowhere near as impactful as Gillan or Neely's versions, but I could at least see that Legend was trying. This part made me recognize that he isn't necessarily a bad actor, he just isn't consistent enough in his performance for it to be believable that he is in character.

He displayed some really impressive rock-belting midway through the song, right around where most people usually go for the g5 note. It sounds so gravelly and crisp, and I really wish he used it more during this performance. Additionally, I am very happy that he didn't go for the g5. That part usually makes or breaks the performance, and with Legend I think we know which way the egg was gonna fall.

There were some good choices made here as well as some bad ones. He still did some nasty falsettos in the latter half of the song, which actually made me laugh. Seriously, who convinced him that was okay? I feel like this would have been a well-regarded performance without that.

Overall, I'm impressed. The weak points were weak, but few, and the strong points were really strong. It wasn't nearly as poor as people made it out to be.

~The Arrest~

The kiss was nice and tender. I like the way Jesus hugs Judas afterwards too, that was very sweet. For some reason it sounded like Legend said "Judas, must you betray me with a gay?" which I thought was pretty funny.

I like how the arrest was framed as a news stint, with reporters and mics and all that. It was also pretty neat how they interspersed the solo lines with ensemble lines.

~Peter's Denial~

Peter was good, but the real standout here was that guy with the phone that sang "But I saw him too, he looked just like you." God DAMN! They went OFF!! Can he play Judas next please?

~Pilate and Christ~

Pilate is really the one bringing the camp here. He ate this up.

~King Herod's Song~

Well. What do you want me to say here? It's Alice Cooper. Do you really think I am physically, mentally, or legally capable of criticizing Alice Cooper?

I'll spare you the fangirling I did in my notes app; just know I, as well as the audience, was very happy to see this man doing his thing.

Also, as a rocker, he actually made this song fit with the rest of the play, which is truly a feat.

(Still not as good as his episode on The Muppets).

~Could we Start Again Please~

Even though I love Sara as Mary, and Peter did a good job as well, I wish they included more ensemble in this song. I feel like it's more impactful that way as it shows that there were still people who believed in Jesus. Still, I'm so glad they decided to keep this song in most JCS productions because it's one of my favorites.

~Judas's Death~

Oh no, he lost the leather vest! I'm not complaining though... 😏

This is the part where I praise Dixon for his showmanship, 'cause this man just got THROWN and he KEPT SINGING! I found that to be very impressive. Though I will say, the increase in his emotional performance seems to cause his singing to suffer a bit. To be fair, it's an incredibly hard part to sing.

Aside from Jesus going bonkers in the Temple, Judas' reprise of "I Don't Know How to Love Him" is my favorite scene in the original movie. Did Dixon live up to my expectations? Well, considering my expectations were pretty low to begin with, he exceeded them.

This is seriously the best acting I've seen in the whole play. Dixon completely sells his performance. Consider me a proud and satisfied viewer.

Although, quick PSA to the audience. You don't actually have to clap every time a man sings in falsetto, mkay? Thanks <3

~Trial Before Pilate~

This song is notorious for its difficult timing considering it's just talksingtalksingtalk *BUM* talksingtalksingtalk *BUM* for a bit. This Pilate though? Yeah, he nails it. I was really impressed by his performance. Also, when he said "talk to me Jesus Christ," that was the most sexual tension I've seen in a stage play, wow.

I don't really understand what was going on in the flogging scene, because the ensemble members were just running past him individually, but Legend was selling it. It definitely looked like he was in pain, and the lashes on his back didn't look sloppy or rushed.

Another emotional crux of the play is when Pilate basically yells "DON'T LET ME STOP YOUR GREAT SELF DESTRUCTION!!" I was a little let down by this guy's performance of these lines honestly. However, he was virtually perfect the rest of the time so I can't really be mad.

~Superstar~

THIS. THIS IS IT.

For whatever reason, Dixon just decided to turn the iconic scale up to 1000. The diamond laced fit. The dancing. The footwork. Everything about this performance was absolutely incredible, and I am just ecstatic about it. I mean, the man was full on spinning on the ground while singing. Every run he did now has a permanent residence in my brain. If you decide not to watch this version of JCS, I understand. I don't blame you. But if nothing else, please please PLEASE watch this part on Youtube. You won't regret it.

In the words of a close friend of mine, he slayed, ate it up, left no crumbs, licked it clean, you could eat off that plate again.

~The Crucifixion~

There were some lines in here that definitely weren't in the movie, and again, I'm not super familiar with the broadway play so I'm not sure how much of this was changed for this version alone. Nonetheless, Legend did a good job here. I mean, attempting to portray Jesus dying on a cross is a task to be sure, and he accomplished it.

~John Nineteen: Forty One~

There seemed to be some resurrection imagery here, so, congratulations Christians. He did the rising. (I am not religious, can you tell)?

I love me a good curtain call. They're just so joyous.

So! Was this production worth two hours of me composing my thoughts on it into a Tumblr post approximately five people will read? You tell me. I certainly enjoyed my time with it, and I hope to do this with more productions. I'm looking forward to watching both the 2012 revival and broadway productions, the 2014 Swedish one, and the 2000 movie. Please let me know if you have any suggestions for others I might enjoy or that you would like to see a breakdown of.

#jesus christ superstar #jesus christ superstar 2018 #review #jcs 2018 #jcs #john legend #brandon victor dixon #alice cooper #nbc #sara bareilles #Youtube

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