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#i'm not even halfway through typing up my notes so have this for now
ao3commentoftheday · 5 months
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Hey!
This is something that's been rolling around in my head for a while, and I'm wondering if you or any of your followers have experience with getting back into writing after illness.
I've been chronically ill for a long time. My symptoms vary a lot depending on external circumstances. From about 2019-2021 or so, I was updating an AU about once a month and having an absolute blast with it...then my health hit a stumbling block. Then it hit another, and another.
I'm now at a point where the stumbling blocks don't seem to be going away anytime soon. I'm starting to feel the mental health effects of not having the spoons to work writing into my day.
I spent the past couple years trying to let myself lie fallow and be kind with my brain when my body needs so much help. I'm at a point where even when I WANT to write, it feels like it's been so long I've almost forgotten how. I'm stalled on all my WIPs from that AU, but it doesn't feel like writer's block so much as it feels like writer's atrophy. I miss it terribly, but I'm having a lot of trouble getting back on my feet.
Thank you for everything you've given our community over the years! 💜💜
*hugs* that's a rough spot to be in, and I hope that we can offer you some ways to get out of it. I'll offer some suggestions from my own experience with a change in health status, but I'm really hopeful that the rest of the blog have some tips to share as well.
Don't hold yourself up to your previous standards. Your abilities have changed, and you should take that into account. If you used to be able to write for 2 hours and now you can only manage 10 minutes, don't see that as a failure. 10 minutes is now your success point. If you used to be able to manage 100K stories with intricate plots and now you find it a challenge to write a straightforward oneshot? Then finishing that oneshot is an accomplishment to be proud of.
If the way you used to do things doesn't work, don't keep trying to do them that way. If you used to type onto a laptop but now staring at the screen makes you feel exhausted? Try dictating into your phone and using speech to text to transcribe it. Then you can go through and edit what's already there. If you used to write at a desk but now sitting up for long periods wears you out? Try tapping it out on your phone in bed. You can't focus for long periods the way that you used to? Turn on the TV and write during commercial breaks.
Don't try to pick up right where you left off. You need to get yourself back in writing shape before you can take on a story that's already halfway written. Those WIPs will still be there, even if you start off with a ficlet or a missing moment or a post-episode coda etc. Start off small. Use ideas or plots that are easier for you to write. Get back into the swing of it before you try to tackle a big project again.
As you try to write something and you find yourself unable to, take a moment and try to identify what the hard part is. Are you having trouble finding words? Are you in an uncomfortable position? Is the device you're using annoying you or difficult to work with? For each problem you can identify, see if you can find an accommodation for it - and look to see if other people have had to accommodate the same issue before you. It's very likely that they have.
I'll stop here and let the spoonies share their thoughts in the notes. I look forward to picking up some advice for myself too ❤️
You can find this question and answer over on Dreamwidth as well, if you'd like to join the conversation over there.
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mrkis · 6 months
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you'll never find anyone like me — one. (l.dh)
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PAIRING: lee donghyuck x afab!reader GENRE: college au, fluff, mature WORD COUNT: 14.9k
SYNOPSIS: you’ll never find anyone like lee donghyuck, and that’s what makes him so exciting.
CHAPTERS WARNINGS: slow burn(ish) type, so much plot & way too much dialogue, alcohol consumption, explicit language, a lot of mentions of donghyuck being obsessed, heavy tension between reader and donghyuck, mentions of parties & drugs, donghyuck comes across as very straight forward and also flirty, pretty people make reader nervous lol (especially donghyuck), tension between two main characters but no smut yet.
AUTHORS NOTE:: its finally here!! i'm so excited to start this series with you all, thank you for your patience!! also, for anyone new, this is linked to my 'NEO TECH COLLEGE' jaemin series 'the way life goes' although this can be read as a standalone.
[SERIES MASTERLIST]
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It wasn’t exactly ideal enrolling into class halfway through the year, knowing you’ll have to go through that godawful stage of trying to make friends with people who already have chosen their own clique to spend the rest of their college years with.
You’re, unfortunately, the new student, the one that’ll be singled out during group projects or the one they pick last for the group because they didn’t want to choose you first… you really don’t know which one is worse.
Looking for a place to settle down was a close second to being one of the worst things to do after enrolling late. You didn’t have enough money to live by yourself and you sure as hell didn’t want to live with someone you hardly even knew, but you had to pick one, so you went with the latter.
Areum was actually the sweetest (and coolest) person you have ever met. 
She welcomed you into her two bedroom apartment with open arms and even helped get you settled into your new room by offering to unpack your boxes and decorate the way you preferred, allowing you to have all the creative freedom you needed to call this place your home too.
Areum had even taken time out of her own busy schedule to show you around, letting you know about all the best food joints, best places to go to get coffee, best album stores to get your preferred music and even the best hangout spots. 
It was, undoubtedly, a lot to take in. 
Areum even introduced you to Minjun, a childhood friend of hers who is a college dropout and now the drummer in a two-man band with his older brother. (They’re pretty good, even though the older brother scares the shit out of you). 
Minjun was the complete opposite of Areum yet they were alike in so many ways, it was easy to make friends with him just as it was with Areum. Minjun was sceptical of you at first though, but he immediately warmed up to you when you complimented his drum set to which he then showed you how to play. (You had no idea, but it was fun).
You cherish the friendships you have made with the two deeply even though you felt like you were intruding at the beginning, especially when you realised how long they have actually known each other and how close they are. But the pair happily invited you into their small friendship with big grins and playful jokes.
You were grateful to be starting something new with people who you felt instantly comfortable with, you were excited to see what your time in college had in store for you. 
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“Shit!” You repeatedly curse under your breath as you hurry across campus grounds with your bag strap sliding down your shoulders and your phone held tightly in your grip, staring down at the time that shined angrily at you due to your lateness.
Being late on your very first day wasn’t exactly something you wanted to experience, but the pressure of getting everything ready and the stress of overthinking lead you to being exhausted and oversleeping—you wanted the ground to swallow you up when you received the mass texts from Areum asking if you made it to your class in time. 
You fix the strap on your shoulder as you rush into the building, eyeing the signs on the walls that would easily lead you to your music class and you groan when you realise it’s at the far end of the building, breaking out into another sprint and you’re grateful there’s no one around to see you make a complete fool of yourself as you run.
Glancing down at your phone, you wince at the time and you look back up to make sure you’re going to right way but you curse under your breath when you realise you’re heading straight towards someone’s back and you don’t even have time to stop yourself or control your speed, already bumping into them at full force which causes them to stumble forwards from the impact.
The person they’re with steadies them and you manage to get a quick glimpse at the girl who’s looking at you in shock before the victim spins around, his eyes angry and ready to curse you out but you don’t even notice how his eyes soften when he looks at you as you’re already profusely apologising to him.
“I’m so sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going and I—fuck—I didn’t mean to fall into you like that, I’m just late and—”
“It’s fine.” The girl cuts off your rambling, sending you a reassuring smile as the guy continues to stare at you and you nod, mumbling another quick apology as you turn your head and see the door to your assigned class, quickly slipping through the door and letting it close shut behind you, heart racing rapidly in your chest at the full class of students who briefly glance at you before returning to their work.
The Professor looks up from his computer when you enter the room, gazing at you over the rim of his glasses and he gives you a welcoming smile, beckoning you over with his hand and you head straight towards him, getting ready to apologise for being so late but he’s already opening his mouth to speak first.
“I’m surprised you’re starting halfway through the year, but I’m happy to have you in this class. Welcome,” He smiles warmly at you and it instantly makes you feel better, your shoulders relaxing with a breath of relief as you smile back at him thankfully. “I’m Professor Kim Hongjoong. I’ll be your music Professor during your time here and if you need any help with anything, I’d be happy to give you some guidance… although, I have to encourage my students to ask one another. Team bonding type of stuff.”
“Noted.” You laugh lightly with a nod, adjusting the bag strap on your shoulder.
“Great.” Professor Kim grins up at you. 
He dismisses you to a seat at the far back of the class next to a boy whose face is shoved into his computer screen, chunky headphones resting on his head as his fingers dance across a piano keyboard, nodding to the notes that play smoothly in his ears and you pull out the seat to sit beside him, sliding your bag off your shoulder and letting it rest by the legs of the chair.
Capturing your seatmate's attention, he turns to look at you and gives you a warm and welcoming smile, pulling the headphones from his head to rest around his neck. He introduces himself as Xiaojun and he takes the opportunity to point out everyone in the room to let you know their names, and even though it didn’t exactly help and you sure as hell wouldn’t remember everyone's names, you were grateful at least.
“How come you enrolled in the middle of the year?” Xiaojun suddenly asks you and you give him a sheepish grin in response. He raises a questioning brow, “Wasn’t going to enrol or something?”
“Something like that.” 
“Interesting.” Xiaojun hums and he turns his head back to his computer screen while your attention is brought towards the classroom door that swings open, and embarrassment immediately washes over you when you recognise the guy that steps inside, the one you had forcefully slammed into on your way here.
You sink down into your seat in hopes to avoid him to keep your own dignity and your brows pull together in confusion when you see his eyes glance around the room, tilting his head to the side in thought and tongue prodding at his cheek as he scans over the row of seats before he finds you.
His lips curl into a smirk and his eyebrows raise in a way that has your heart thumping rapidly in your chest, immediately drawing your attention away from him when he drops down into a seat beside Yangyang, (a guy that Xiaojun had pointed out to you when filling you in on everyone’s names), who is too busy scrolling through his phone to notice his presence. 
“Donghyuck.”
“What?” You hum, glancing at Xiaojun when you hear him mutter.
“That’s Donghyuck, the one that just came back in/” Xiaojun tells you and you made a small noise of acknowledgment, taking another peek over at him only to avert your eyes away when you realise he’s already looking at you and you feel hot, a little embarrassed and awkward at being caught.
“Has he got a staring problem or something?” You catch yourself mumbling under your breath and your eyes widen when you hear Xiaojun snort, completely capturing what you had just said and you groan, leaning back into your chair with a frown as Xiaojun looks at you with an amused smile.
“Something like that.”
The class surprisingly goes by quicker than you thought and both Professor Kim and Xiaojun were kind enough to fill you in on what you’ve missed so far, and what’s coming up soon. Luckily, as you enrolled in so late, you were excused from the upcoming assignment but were given a side task to write down everything you had knowledge of, including the instruments that you’re skilled in playing.
You found it quite simple and you’re positive you can jot down everything tonight so you wouldn’t have to worry about it later on. You’ve always been eager to please, so there was no way in hell you were going to leave this until the last minute.
You rise from your seat and grab your bag, slipping the strap over your shoulder as you subconsciously peer over at the other end of the room, your heart thumping wildly in your ears when you catch Donghyuck’s eyes already looking back at you while talking to Yangyang, leaning back on the desk with his hands shoved deep into his pockets and leather jacket draped over his arm.
His deep and intense gaze makes you feel nervous and you find yourself fidgeting in your spot, unable to tear your own eyes away from him, locked under his stare and the smirk that he gives you sends goosebumps rippling down your spine.
It’s when he pushes himself off the desk that brings you out of your trance, panic flooding through you when it seems like he’s about to advance towards you but he stays in his place when a hand carefully touches your arm, causing you to quickly turn towards the person that wanted your attention.
Xiaojun’s smiling warmly at you, but you’re surprised when you see that he’s not alone and instead, there are two other guys standing with him.
One wears a green hoodie beneath a grey jacket and matching coloured jeans, a beanie on his head with blue strands of hair peeking from beneath. The round, thin framed glasses on the bridge of his nose makes him look cute, yet the boyish grin he gives you makes you feel a little flustered and you move your attention to the other boy beside him.
He’s a lot more quiet and awkward, opting to give you a tight lipped smile as a greeting and nodding his head to say he’s acknowledged you. You’re not surprised by his shy demeanour𑁋especially with how he’s refusing to make eye contact and how his fingers nervously fiddle with the bracelet dangling on his wrist. 
“This is Mark,” Xiaojun points to the one in the hoodie. “And this is Jihoon,” He points to the other before he turns to you and gives you a smile, “These guys are who I spent the majority of my time with, unfortunately”
“You love us, dude,” Mark’s boyish grin returns as he pats Xiaojun’s shoulder who playfully rolls his eyes and Mark looks at you. “You’re welcome to join us for lunch if you want?”
“Oh, thank you,” You smile appreciatively but it slowly drops when you realise what you had planned already. “Can I join you some other time? I have somewhere to be today.”
“Of course you can.” Mark’s grin widens as his hand removes off Xiaojun’s shoulder to gently knock yours and you grow nervous under the small contact, a shy smile spreading across your lips as you bid them a silent goodbye, brushing past the trio to get to the door and your mouth goes dry, your nerves amping up to a hundred as you once again meet Donghyuck’s eyes from his position next to Yangyang, how he watches you with a hint of intrigue and interest swimming in his irises. 
You miss the way his eyes snap towards your new friends with a locked jaw, tongue prodding at his cheek as you leave the room.
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Watching Areum work has always been fascinating to you: in awe of the talent that pours out of her hands and the patience she has when it comes to sculpting certain objects and/or people for projects or just to pass the time, how every piece is precise and perfect𑁋a complete masterpiece.
It’s the look of determination and joy that seals the deal for you, how happy and content she seems to be whenever she’s in her zone, and having the opportunity to witness her working in the studio at college for the first time is definitely the highlight of your already long and interesting day.
You bite into your lunch as you watch her from behind get her hands dirty while sculpting her recent project, soothing out the curves of a woman’s body that she has been putting together while humming a tune that plays quietly from the radio on the windowsill beside her.
Areum takes a step back to admire her work, a sound of approval slipping past her lips before she decides to take a break, unzipping her black overalls halfway to take her arms out of the sleeves and tying them around her waist securely so the rest doesn’t fall down completely, allowing her tattooed arms to be freed and on show with her white shirt. 
“Did you make it to your class in time this morning?” Areum asks you as she leans against the open window, pulling her strawberry vape out of her pocket to take a drag and you shake your head, causing her to chuckle lowly. “I thought Minjun put an alarm on your phone before he left last night?”
“I slept through it,” You say bitterly, taking another bite of your lunch as she clicks her tongue against her teeth. “Thinking about today got me stressed and I overslept. Ended up almost being an hour late and not only that, I practically body slammed someone because I rushed to get to class. It was embarrassing.”
“Ouch,” Areum teases while scrunching her nose up, taking another hit out of her vape and blowing the smoke out of the window. You roll your eyes, twisting the cap on your bottle of water to take a sip. “Made any friends in your class though?”
You side eye her, “You sound like my mother,” She smirks at you. “Got to know this guy called Xiaojun. He introduced me to his friends Mark and Jihoon just before class ended. I only know those three so far.”
“Good,” Areum hums with an approving nod. “I know Mark and Xiaojun, I’ve bumped into them a few times… don’t know Jihoon though.”
“He’s kinda quiet,” You admit, remembering your very brief encounter with him. You smile, “He didn’t say anything but he seemed welcoming at least. They offered me to join them for lunch but I said I already had plans today.”
“You ditched them to hang out with me?” Areum looks at you with a blank expression and you nod, giving her an innocent grin as you finish off the last bite. “I don’t know whether to thank you or call you stupid.”
You swallow thickly, “I know you better than them so being with you right now is the safest and comforting option to me. I’d like to get to know them more eventually and hang out with them… but it’s kind of hard to do that when I get shy and awkward around people I don’t know.”
“You did well with me and Minjun,” She praises you and you feel your cheeks grow hot at that, trying to fight the smile that threatens to slip onto your lips. “But don’t worry, you got this. Take your time, there’s no rush.”
“I’m not going to rush,” You tell her, resting your chin on your hand as you look over at her, your other hand tapping a mindless tune on the wooden table. “I’m taking everything slowly.” 
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It took you just over a month to get comfortable in your new college. 
You managed to remember everyone's names in your course and despite not talking to some of them, they had become easier to remember overtime. 
Xiaojun, Mark and Jihoon never left your side during classes and just like Areum and Minjun, they also welcomed you into their group with open arms and jokes that had you laughing until your stomach cramped up and tears pooled in your eyes. 
Jihoon became a lot more open with you as you did him. He was just like you—shy and awkward around people he barely knew or wasn’t comfortable with yet, didn’t want to speak up or take control of the conversation in fear of saying something silly, but when getting comfortable with the people it was non stop talking and cracking jokes, even pitching a few sarcastic comments here and there to make others smile.
Xiaojun and Mark were similar—outgoing and confident, striking up conversations and making friends as if it was the easiest thing to do, making others feel invited and welcomed although there was a few moments where you see their shy tendencies come through the cracks, noticing how shy Xiaojun got when being compliment on his voice when singing a song to himself under his breath and when Mark gets shy when he receives unwanted attention from others that compliment his work or his looks. 
Aisha, a girl in your class, was one of the people that would compliment Mark over and over again, making him flustered and cheeks grow red with each word and giggle that slips from her lips. She’s gorgeous, so it doesn’t surprise you that Mark gets shy easily when she comes near.
Aisha is one of the people you haven’t properly spoken to yet. Her sociable and popular presence leaves you a little intimidated. You’ve shared a few friendly smiles and some small words in passing, but you haven’t had the courage to speak to her fully. 
You, admittedly, like to admire her from afar. Seeing how confident and friendly she is, how she teasingly flirts and prettily smiles at others who conversate with her, how her delicate hands play with her healthy hair that cascades down her back, how her siren-like voices lures people in when she’s talking or even singing.
It makes you jealous, but not in a bad way. You could only wish you had the same confidence and likeness. 
Donghyuck is another person you haven’t spoken to yet. You feel nervous being in his presence, how his intense gaze leaves you speechless and unable to think properly. How his lingering touches on your skin leaves goosebumps running down your spine every time he brushes past you to either get to his seat or if he was just walking by in the hallways. 
He glances over his shoulder each time, lips curling into a grin, dark eyes piercing through you as he meets your eyes and takes in your appearance, tongue sweeping across his bottom lip before it tucks between his teeth as he takes in your outfit of the day. 
Even if you’re wearing something that completely covers you, he makes you feel bare. 
Xiaojun is the one that tells you to stray far away from Donghyuck, that he’s nothing but a ‘slut who loves attention and flirts with any living thing’. Mark did however clap back and told Xiaojun that he himself loves the attention too, which caused Xiaojun to jut out his bottom lip in a pout and turn away, but Mark mentioned how Donghyuck can be a little crazy sometimes and to try and not let his continuous stares and actions get under your skin. 
You agreed, saying that wouldn’t be the case, even though you’re lying through your teeth already.
He is getting under your skin, leaving his mark on you and truthfully, it’s interesting. 
You will never admit that out loud. 
“Why are you being so quiet?” You hear somebody ask you suddenly and you rip yourself out of your thoughts, blinking at you try to see where the source of the sound came from but you let out a huff as a weight is knocked against your shoulder, hissing as you turn your head to see Minjun who had dropped down to the sofa to sit beside you.
He’s grinning at you in greeting but mumbles a quick apology when he realises he’s hurt you, rubbing the sore area before pulling his hand back to pull his phone out of his pockets.
You stay silent for a moment, staring at him as he mindlessly drums his fingers against the side of his phone as he reads a text and you immediately recognise it as the new song that he and his brother have been working on, the corner of your lips stretching into a smile.
However, his drumming comes to a sudden stop when Byeol pounces up on the arm of the sofa on his left, staring at Minjun with his tail slowly swishing behind him before he steps down onto Minjun’s thighs to find the perfect spot to rest and Minjun clicks his tongue against his teeth in annoyance. 
“I hate this cat.” He grumbles under his breath despite raising his hand to pet Byeol behind his ears, loud purring noises rumbling from his chest. Minjun glances at you, “You didn’t answer my question.”
“What question?” You mutter as you reach over to pet Byeol too.
“About why you’re being so quiet.”
“There’s no reason,” You tell him truthfully, smiling as Byeol nuzzles his head into your palm. “I was enjoying the silence and just thinking about some things.”
“What things?”
Your eyes snap to him, teasing in your tone, “None of your business.”
“Ouch. You wound me,” He speaks monotone, pulling his hand away from Byeol to adjust the beanie on top of his head. “I have a show this weekend at Cherry Bomb, you’re coming right?”
“Obviously,” You hum. “Me and Areum never miss your shows.”
“Lucky charms,” Minjun grins, raising his hand with his pinky outstretched and you snort, wrapping your own pinky around his and squeezing tightly. “EJ and his girlfriend are coming too so we’re going to grab a few beers with them after it, yeah?”
“Sounds good to me,” You nod, retracting your hand from his to pet the cat who’s now climbing into your own lap, rubbing his face in the cotton of your shirt. You purse your lips in thought, “Can I invite people?”
Minjun raises his brow in interest, “Who?”
“Just these guys I’ve made friends with—they’re on my music course,” You briefly explain but you feel the need to go further as Minjun continues to stare at you. “They saw my Instagram post at your show a few weekends back and they asked about you, and they said they’d be interested in seeing you play and—”
“They can come,” He cuts off your rambling, grinning up at you and your brows pull together when he nudges your shoulder. “You don’t have to ask, you know. The more the merrier, right? Besides, Seungwoo will be happy to see some new faces listening to our music.”
“Is he giving you a hard time?”
“Just the usual,” Minjun shrugs. “Worried about the number of people showing up to watch, the amount of unfinished songs he’s written, stuff with our parents too… they’re not exactly supportive of me dropping out of college and him leaving work to pursue music. They say it’s a waste of time.”
“But you’re good at what you do,” You tell him truthfully with a kind smile. “Both of you. You’re booking out bars and performing in front of big crowds almost every weekend, I say that’s pretty impressive.”
The corner of Minjun's lips lift upwards, his head tilting to the side slightly as he looks at you, “You think so?”
You nudge his shoulder, “I know so.”
Minjun breaks out into a full smile this time and he nudges you back as a small gesture of a thank you before he shifts in his seat, getting comfortable leaning against the cushions as he resumes scrolling through his phone.
You relax into him, peering your head over his shoulder to watch the screen as he shows you his current Instagram home page filled with musicians, concert photos and the occasional selfie of those he follows. You hardly recognise any of them, apart from the few Areum had posted and EJ with his girlfriend, but you still wiggle your eyebrows suggestively and make flirty comments when you see the sexy mirror pictures posted by some. 
Minjun just rolls his eyes and tells you to be quiet, huffing as he angles himself away from you.
“Oh, I didn’t realise you were here,” You hear Areum’s teasing voice from behind and you crane your neck to see her make her way over to the both of you, a fluffy white towel wrapped tight around her body and another wrapped around her hair from her previous shower. 
She sits in the single loveseat opposite, crossing her legs beneath herself to get comfy and a smile slips upon her lips as Byeol meows loudly, jumping down from your own lap and to find comfort on hers, nuzzling himself in her towel and Areum holds him to her chest, stroking his fur and cooing softly.
“I’m always here.” Minjun gives her a grin.
“Unfortunately~” Areum hums, pressing gentle kisses on the top of Byeol’s head and Minjun rolls his eyes, clicking his tongue against his teeth as he shakes his head.
Areum grins, already feeling proud at already getting under her best friend's skin but you knew deep down that it was just a little joke, knowing first hand how they always bite at each other to try and get one of them to react and lose, adding another point to their mental tally chart.
She coos as she talks to Byeol, scratching below his chin and rubbing behind his ears as you smile at the sight, hearing his loud purrs resonate from where he’s sitting on her lap and Areum’s phone that’s been gripped in her hand vibrates loudly, causing her to pull away from Byeol for a moment to check her screen.
You watch as her brows raise slightly, a smirk spreading across her cheeks and her bottom lip gets caught between her teeth, thumbs quickly tapping against the phone before she raises her head up, looking over at you with an unfamiliar glint in her eye. 
Your face scrunches up, confused. “Why are you looking at me?”
Areum cocks her head to the side, “How do you feel about experiencing your first college party tonight?”
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The sight in front of you is definitely… something.
The house is a lot bigger than you anticipated, expecting to be brought along to a little apartment or even a club for your first official college party, but Areum had thrown you into a complete loop as she brought you to a not so little apartment or club that was already filled with drunk college students, some already even sprawled across the front lawn messily making out or even staring up at the sky giggling to themselves. 
However, you grimace a little when you see someone come stumbling out of the house with their hand clamped over the mouth, barely making it towards a bush before emptying out their stomachs with the most gruesome of sounds. 
A guy comes jogging out of the house shortly after with a water bottle in hand and his phone in the other, your mouth starts to feel a little dry, the attractiveness and confidence that oozes from him as he comes closer stuns you for a moment, the shyness taking over you when he grunts and squats down to tend to the drunken person with their head shoved into the bushes.
The tight black fitted shirt he wears shows off the muscles beneath, how they bulge and tense when he reaches out to caress the person’s back as they retch loudly and your eyes can’t help but shift to his thighs, how the pants are tightening around them which each movement and you gulp, pulling your attention away when you feel Areum slip her arm through yours.
“Seems like you got your hands full already.” Areum speaks first with a teasing tone that’s directed towards the guy and he raises his head, dark eyes glistening under the night sky as he grins at her.
“You got that right,” He chuckles softly, putting the water bottle down on the grass to run his fingers through his dark mullet, gazing at you. “You’re new. I’ve never seen you here before. I’m Jeno.”
You introduce yourself and he repeats your name back to you with a hum and a nod, then he smiles and wishes you a good time at the party before turning back to the person who had seemingly stopped throwing up, ordering them to drink the bottled water and saying how he’s going to call a cab for them to get home safely. 
Minjun, who had been quiet this entire time watching every thing unfold, gently pushes your shoulder to get you to walk and Areum pulls you towards the house by your arm, the loud music blasting inside already hitting your eardrums and you’re instantly hit with the smell of alcohol and weed when you enter. 
The inside is a lot more chaotic than the outside, you conclude. 
Sweaty bodies pressed against each other as they dance or makeout, some even fondling each other to which you immediately avert your attention away when they glance your way. Others are in small groups talking and even playing drinking games, you can just about see a group playing cup pong from where you’re standing at the entrance. 
Minjun leans down to murmur in your ear, “So, what do you think so far?” 
“It’s…” You pause, pulling a face. “Something. Very crowded. There’s people everywhere.”
Minjun’s chest rumbles with a laugh, “And this isn’t even the half of it.”
Your eyes widen at the possible fact of there being more people in the house, already feeling overwhelmed and Areum’s hand slides down your arm to take your own, lacing her fingers through yours as she helps weave you through the crowds, Minjun hot on your tail as he follows behind. 
You glance around while she leads you both to wherever she wants to go and you spot a couple lounging together on the sofa, the pretty blonde smiling at her boyfriend who’s gently tucking her hair behind her ears as he’s mumbling something to her and she nods, causing the boyfriend to grin and clink his drink against hers.
“Here,” Areum’s voice grabs your attention and your turn your head to look at her when you feel her hand slip from yours, noticing that she’s brought you to the kitchen where only a few partygoers are standing, nursing their drinks and chatting with friends. Areum opens the cooler and passes a beer over to Minjun who dips his head in silent thank you before turning to you, “Want a beer? A seltzer?”
“Beer.” You’re thankful she hands you one that you’re familiar with, the ones that the three of you have shared in your apartment during movie and game nights, immediately cracking it open to take a sip and the satisfying burn and flavour that that runs down your throat has you smiling.
It unfortunately doesn’t take long for you to start to feel out of place, your back pressed against a wall in the far corner of the kitchen as you watch Minjun smoke with a guy you overheard is called Sunwoo, a dopey grin smile spreading across his cheeks every time someone had waltzed up to him with money in their hand for one of his baggies that he takes out of his pocket to slip into theirs. 
Areum had politely excused herself from you a few moments prior to greet someone you somewhat recognise as one of her previous hookups, watching as Areum’s hand slips around her waist to hold her close to her body and the girl lets out flirtatious giggles, winding her own arms around Areum’s shoulders as they whisper in each others ears.
You sigh, pursing your lips as you take a glance down at the beer in your hand, shaking the can slightly to feel how much drink was left for you to drink and you frown when you notice it’s empty. You push yourself off of the wall and discard your empty beer in the overflowing trash can, opting to open the cooler and grab another to keep yourself preoccupied but you’re startled when another hand reaches in too, brushing against your own.
“Oh, sorry—” The voice pauses mid sentence and you glance up, your eyes widening in surprise when you see Xiaojun staring back at you with a similar expression. “It’s you!”
“What are you doing here?” You ask with a smile, excitement flowing through your veins as Xiaojun gives you a welcoming side hug, rubbing your back comfortingly. 
“I could ask you the same thing.” Xiaojun pulls back to adjust the backwards cap on his head, not before running his fingers through his hair. You take this moment to take in his appearance, surprised to see him out of his knitted sweaters and chinos which is replaced with a loose fitted grey tank top and dark jeans, showing off his physique which caught you off guard immensely, not expecting to see the muscles.
“My roommate told me to tag along,” You briefly explain to him, pulling your eyes away from his arms and he hums in understanding, handing you a beer before grabbing one for himself. “Are Mark and Jihoon here too?”
“Jihoon’s at home. This isn’t his, uh—” Xiaojun waves his hand around comically. “—type of scene, you know. Mark’s around here somewhere though, lost him when this girl tugged his arm wanting to speak to him in private.”
You make a small noise as you nod your head, assuming that it was another student proclaiming their attraction towards Mark as you have witnessed many times before, feeling bad every time Mark had rejected them even if he was sweet with his words. 
The confidence that people had to confess their feelings to the person they liked always made you jealous, wishing you had the courage to admit your own likeness towards someone but you could never get it out, knowing that the words would constantly get stuck on the tip of your tongue and the fear of rejection wasn’t exactly something you wanted to experience.
So you always held back on telling people how you felt, especially if you liked them. But yet again, seemingly lucky for you, there has never really been anyone that you’ve truly liked. You’ve had small mindless crushes that you knew would lead into nothing and you’ve been in the presence of a few attractive people that definitely make your heart flutter, but it’s never enough to make you want to confess. 
A gentle touch on your arm brings you out of your thoughts and you turn your head to see Minjun standing beside, a gesture to show that he was finally back with you and you couldn’t have been more happier to have more people at your side, giving him a smile to which he returns, the corner of his lips twitching upwards.
“Oh. You’re the guy.” Xiaojun speaks up, eyebrows raised to his hairline in shock as he points at Minjun who looks back at him, seemingly confused but he slowly nods anyways which makes you snort quietly, finding the sight comical. “The drummer from that band, the one on her Instagram—LŒV, right?”
“Yeah,” Minjun hums in surprise before he makes a noise of realisation, piecing two and two together. “You must be one of the guys she told me about, that wanted to come see us play this weekend.”
You zone out of their conversation when Xiaojun praises him for his musical skills, the pair diving deep into the music discussion which usually you would’ve participated in any of time, but you find yourself getting distracted as you watch Areum delicately stroke the back of another girl that she’s talking with, pulling her in closely to whisper in her ear and laughing when the girl pushes her shoulder playfully before tugging her back in. 
Your attention however pulls away from the pair when Areum places two fingers beneath her chin to bring her in for a kiss, feeling awkward to give them an audience and finding interest in a potted plant in the corner of the room, your lips quirking up into an amused smile when you see a drunk cradling it like a newborn, stroking the leaves and cooing.
The sight in front of you is hilarious and you would’ve taken out your phone to take a picture it if wasn’t for the fact you didn’t know this person, not really wanting to be caught and questioned taking pictures of someone you barely knew even if it would make a great memory… and definitely a great birthday card. 
But your eyes flit away from the drunk to the guy that you met outside. Jeno, you remember his name. He strides into the house with a dark wet patch over the front of his clothes and an empty water bottle. 
First, you grimace at the thought of that person he was taking care of outside throwing the water over him in a drunken fit, but then you feel a little warm and flustered when you realise that the water had made his shirt and pants stick to him more than it originally did, outlining his body perfectly, defining the muscles beneath the materials. 
“Why are you ogling Jeno?”
“I’m not,” You immediately defend yourself, attention snapping back to Xiaojun who's already staring back at you with an amused smirk, raising his eyebrow. “I’m not.”
“Pretty sure you are,” Minjun joins in this time and you harden your gaze at him, causing him to grin. “You like him?”
“No.”
“He’s attractive, for sure,” Xiaojun hums, taking a glance at him over your shoulder and watching him as he disappears up the staircase, probably to change out of his wet clothes. “I wouldn’t get too close to him though,”
Now that piques your interest, “Why?”
Xiaojun opens his mouth, ready to tell you what you’re surprisingly desperate to hear until he closes his mouth, brows rising in shock when you feel someone's arms slip around your shoulders to bring your back into their chest.
You immediately recognise it as Areum, the sweet citrus smell of her perfume overwhelming your senses and you turn your head to the side to see her already smiling at you, giving you a comforting squeeze before letting you go to stand beside you to greet Xiaojun.
Xiaojun seems hypnotised by her beauty just like many others are and it doesn’t surprise you, the beauty and the confidence that radiates off of her is enough to have your own heart thumping in your chest and feeling shy whenever she meets your eyes or gives you a pretty smile.
“I’m Areum,” She introduces herself as she reopens the cooler to fetch herself another beer. “Her roomie.”
Xiaojun whispers back in a daze, “Hi roomie.”
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The look on Xiaojun’s face was comical when it slipped into conversation that Areum wasn’t interested in men, his eyes widening and mouth dropping open in shock as he profusely apologised, worried that his dazed look and minor flirtatious comments made her uncomfortable but she shook her head, laughing as she explained everything was fine and that he had no way of knowing her preferences. 
Still, the trio got along quite well and even Mark, who joined in a few minutes prior after complaining about how he was locked in the bathroom for five minutes, got along with Areum and Minjun too. It made you smile, seeing the people you liked getting along with each other and exchanging socials and numbers, it also made you miss Jihoon a little bit, wishing he was here so you could introduce them to your duo of friends. 
However, you did make a mental list to remind yourself to text Jihoon tomorrow morning and tell him you’d add him to the groupchat that Xiaojun was desperate to make.
It doesn’t take long for you all to split from each other too: Areum grabbing your hand to steal you away for a little while and you were surprised that Minjun didn’t follow behind like he usually does, but you were happy to see him so comfortable enough to stick around with Mark and Xiaojun who were happily discussing music techniques and even other bands they both seemed to enjoy.
Areum brought you to the living room this time where the music blasted from the stereo, making it a lot harder to hear what she was saying to you but you managed, opting to lean in close so she could whisper in your ear and you did the same. 
You’re feeling awkward and uncomfortable now though, nursing the third beer in your hand as everyone around you either dances or heavily makes out with the person they’ve come with or even just met, finding it hard to focus your attention on anything as in every corner you look, you see people wrapped up in each other.
A gentle touch is placed on your arm, “Are you okay?”
“Hm?” You hum, looking at Areum who is staring back at you worryingly. “Why?”
“You’ve gone quiet,” She points out and a frown makes its way onto your lips, “Want to go home?”
“What? No. It’s fine,” You quickly shake your head. “I don’t want to ruin your night.”
“You’re not ruining anything,” Areum chuckles softly and when her gaze flicks over your shoulder, you see the surprised look on her face. “Seems like you’ve got an admirer tonight.”
Her words have you making a noise of confusion and she nods in the direction of your so-called ‘admirer’ and you’re embarrassingly quick to whip your head around, not making your movements subtle at all which she snorts at in amusement. 
Your heart thumps loudly in your ears as you spot Donghyuck manspreading on the sofa a few feet in front of you, long dark hair hanging over his eyes and a joint resting between his lips which he inhales deeply, holding the smoke in his lungs for what seems to be an eternity until he exhales, passing the joint over to Yangyang all while staring directly at you. 
You feel hot beneath his intense stare, the dress you're wearing now seeming a little too tight and revealing that you subconsciously wrap your arms around yourself to cover up, not missing the way Donghyuck’s lips curl into a smirk before he brings a bottle up to his mouth, chugging the alcoholic beverage. 
You clear your throat, “That’s Donghyuck.”
“I know.”
Your head snaps towards Areum in surprise, “You know?”
“Yeah, of course,” Areum laughs lightly as she puts down her empty beer can on the windowsill. She presses her lips together as she leans back against the wall with her hands shoved into her low cut jeans. “Everyone here pretty much knows Donghyuck. He’s best friends with Jeno and that group.”
“Jeno…” You repeat the familiar name and you jab your thumb in the direction to where he’s standing, now dressed up in something completely different than last: wearing a white and dark grey ombre dress shirt with the buttons left undone, revealing his toned chest. You couldn’t look at him for too long without feeling flustered. “Him?”
“It’s his house—” She pauses, “Their house. They all live together, all five of them. But the sixth one recently moved out to live with his girlfriend.”
“Oh,” You blink, the curiosity inside of you building. “How do you know so much about this stuff?”
“They’re well-known,” Areum shrugs nonchalantly. “Some might say popular, I guess. Everyone pretty much knows everything about them… For starters, Jeno is the main guy that throws all these parties. He’s kind of a gym freak and he’s secretly really smart, he’s an engineering student. Jeno’s also one of those quote unquote ‘renown fuckboy’. He dated Miwoo for a long while—she’s the black haired one wearing a pretty black dress—but they broke up,
“Jaemin is one of the quiet ones, kind of mysterious in some ways too. You’ll hardly ever see him that much though, but he does appear every now and again to be around Jeno—they’ve been best friends for years. He’s a photography student who used to be in a serious relationship with a girl named Eunbin but they broke up. He did end up having a friends with benefits relationship with one of the girls in the group and then they got together, she’s currently away on a writer's trip,
“Renjun’s also one of the quiet ones, more of an observer. He sits in silence the majority of the time but he’s mean when he wants to be, plus doesn’t exactly take shit from anybody either so he can be kind of intimidating to some people. He’s an art student, some of his work is showcased on the walls in the art department. He’s also dating the pretty blonde that he's sitting with his arm around right now—Haru,
“Shotaro is the friendly and cute one that constantly smiles no matter what type of situation he is in. He’s pretty chilled out, carefree. He’s a dance student too… a really good one. He’s practically the baby of their group—everyone has a soft spot for him. He did however end up getting into a fight with Hyunjin because Yeji—Hyunjin’s ex—kissed him at a party. But even though Hyunjin was the one that threw the first punch, he ended up looking worse than Shotaro thanks to Yangyang who jumped in,
“Yangyang is another renown fuckboy, practically fucks anyone with a pussy between their legs. I’m almost positive he has slept with the majority of the girls in this room. He drinks and smokes weed a lot, and recently he’s been taking some harder stuff until he can’t physically function too. He once had a crush on one of the girls in their group—Jaemin’s now girlfriend—but nobody really knows what happened between them. I’m assuming he kept his feelings to himself considering Jaemin and her are all coupled up now, but anyway. Yangyang’s best friend is Donghyuck, you probably won’t ever see one without the other, they’re like two peas in a pod,
“Donghyuck… he’s interesting, I guess. A jokester, pretty dramatic at times but he can also switch into his serious mode which hardly no-one has ever seen. He parties a lot, definitely can outdrink anybody in this room. Smokes weed too and pops a few pills thanks to Sunwoo. He’s a little emo too which gives him a lot of attention—he’s attractive, he knows it. He sleeps around a lot and with anyone too, he plays both teams. But something kinda flipped in him after a while when he got a little obsessed with Aisha who actually rejected him not so long ago—”
“Isn’t, like, obsessed too much of a harsh word?” You cut her off with a frown, not liking the way she explained him to you. “Maybe he just had a crush on her or something? A big one?”
Areum laughs at that, clearly amused as she shakes her head. “No, sweetheart. When I say obsessed, I mean obsessed. The thing with Donghyuck is that he gets obsessed with people he likes pretty quickly… It’s like he gets infatuated with them, wants to give them his all and more.”
You can’t help but ask, “Is Aisha the only one that he’s been… obsessed with?”
“I doubt it. I heard that Donghyick was once obsessed with Jeno when they first became friends. It’s not that shocking, to be honest. Jeno is an attractive looking guy,” Areum explains to you as she pulls her hand out of her pocket, now holding a strawberry flavoured vape and placing it between her lips to inhale. She blows the smoke out of the corner of her mouth, making sure not to aim towards your face. “Donghyuck’s obsession with people can be pretty intense and sometimes I think Aisha made a lucky escape, although I’m familiar with how much she enjoys attention so she’ll probably want it back once she realises he’s got a new obsession.”
“A new obsession?” Your brows raise in surprise at that and you lean in closer as if what she’s telling you is about to be top secret. “Who is his new obsession?”
The smirk that spreads across Areum’s cheeks makes your body buzz and heart beat rapidly in your chest, growing even more curious but also nervous to know the answer as you watch as she takes another quick inhale of her vape before glancing over your shoulder.
“Well, with the way he’s staring at you over there with that look in his eyes, I think you’re the next target,” Areum’s eyes meet yours. “You’re his new obsession, sweetheart.”
His new what? 
“No I’m not,” A laugh forces its way out of your throat, a nervous one at that. You found it slightly ridiculous, really. There was absolutely no way that you could be his ‘new obsession’. It doesn’t make any sense. “He hardly knows me. We haven’t even spoken a word to each other… I think you’ve got it wrong.”
“Maybe,” She hums, eyes flickering over your shoulder once more. “But with the way he’s walking over here, I think I might be right on this one.”
He is what?
You’re glued in place, unable to turn around and see if she’s telling the truth or teasing you. The look on her face seems serious which makes you feel nervous, but the tone she uses is light which makes you think maybe she is playing tricks, wanting to tease you and see your reactions. 
But it’s the deep call of your name and the warm hand touching your upper arm is what makes you realise that she is, in fact, not lying. 
The nerves and the anxiety kicks in as you turn to face the person who had called out your name, your breath getting caught in the back of your throat as you meet Donghyuck’s dark eyes and that smile you have seen plenty of times before in class—the smile he always gives you when you catch his attention and when you meet his gaze. 
Having been this close to him, Donghyuck, without a doubt, is prettier up close and your tummy flutters at the proximity, almost wanting to take a step back just to put some space between you so you can breathe properly, to conjure up a thought or to even start the conversation as it dawns on you how long you’ve been embarrassingly quiet for.
“Hi,” You greet him, mentally kicking yourself for how silly your voice sounded. You open your mouth to speak again and you immediately regret what comes out, “You’re the guy from my music class.”
One of Donghyuck’s brows lifts in amusement, seemingly surprised but also enjoying how you’re pretending you don’t already know him but he plays along anyways, nodding his head slowly with that smile that makes your hands clammy. “I’m Donghyuck.”
“Donghyuck,” You repeat with a nod. His eyes darken at you saying his name, tongue coming out to sweep over his bottom lip to wet it. “I’m—”
“I know who you are.” He cuts you off and the embarrassment you feel amps up to a hundred, remembering how he called out your name a few moments prior. You’re unsure why you’re acting weird and awkward, maybe it was because he made you feel nervous. 
“I’m going to get us another drink,” Areum tells you, placing her hand on your shoulder to get your attention and you turn to her, eyes widening at the thought of her leaving you. “I’ll be right back. Stay here.”
The second Areum slips into the crowd to head towards the kitchen area, Donghyuck takes her place by the wall, leaning against it comfortably as his ringed fingers run through his dark locks, pushing his bangs out of the way and revealing his forehead for a split moment before his hair falls back into place, the tips almost touching his eyes that never seem to leave you. 
He finally asks, “Why did you pretend not to know me?”
“I don’t know,” You immediately reply, unable to stop yourself. “I didn’t mean it. I think I’m just nervous.”
The smile on his face widens before his bottom lip gets caught between his teeth, tilting his head to the side, “I make you nervous?”
“Big parties do,” You partially lie, clearing your throat. “People everywhere, you know… gets overwhelming.”
Donghyuck hums, “Right.”
“I’m serious,” You defend yourself for whatever reason and Donghyuck finds amusement in your voice and actions, eyes sparkling as you seemingly come out of your awkward shell for a few seconds, talking to him in a tone as you would with close friends and he even spots the corner of your lips twitching, almost smiling at him. “Being in a room crowded with people isn’t exactly something I enjoy.”
“I believe you,” He tells you softly. He wants to keep this conversation going, enjoying this side of you that’s slowly becoming comfortable with him already. He likes it, the sparkle in your eyes, the tone of your voice, the subtle peaceful expression on your face. He wants more. “Are you enjoying yourself here?”
That makes you pause. Are you enjoying yourself? You came with Areum and Minjun, two people who you enjoy being in the presence of. You stumbled across Xiaojun and Mark, two other people who bring enjoyment into your life and you were actually ecstatic when seeing Xiaojun for the first time earlier. The beer that was available in the cooler happened to be one of your favourite alcoholic beverages (you’ve had three of those already.) and the music that blasts from the speakers happens to be of a genre you listen to on the regular. 
You finally have your answer, “It’s not so bad.”
“Could it be better?” Donghyuck presses and your lips press together in deep thought before shrugging your shoulders, somewhat agreeing. Donghyuck leans in towards you, “Could I make it better?”
Your brows pull together in confusion, “You can do that? How could you do that?”
Donghyuck can’t help but smile at that and you grow even more confused when he begins to laugh softly, shaking his head. You wonder if you said the wrong thing or if there was a certain meaning behind his question that you failed to pick up on.  
A frown forms on your face due to you feeling a little stupid, thinking that he’s laughing at you or your dumb response and Donghyuck immediately notices you rebuilding the walls, how that look on your face that he adores slowly starts to slip and he straightens up against the wall, toning down his teasing.
“I like your dress, by the way.” His compliment shocks you, not expecting it to come from him and you instantly look down at your dress. 
At first, you wonder what’s wrong with it. If there was a stain you didn’t notice or if there was a tear in the fabric, but then you come to terms with that fact there’s nothing wrong with the dress and, actually, it’s probably one of the best that you own. It doesn’t cling to your body uncomfortably nor does it seem loose, it fits you well. 
You raise your head to thank him, but your words are stuck in the back of your throat when you notice the way he’s looking at you. He’s drinking you in, taking in your appearance, gaze roaming over the length of the dress with a deep inhale before his eyes snap back up to yours, the dark look returning.
“It’s pretty,” Donghyuck exhales, leaning his head back against the wall while keeping eye contact with you. “You’re really pretty.”
You’re flustered now. The attention from him becomes a bit too much and you find yourself feeling hot under his intense stare and there’s an unfamiliar feeling swirling in the pit of your tummy, something you’ve never felt before and it shocks you, but you try to not bring too much attention to it.
You debate on whether to thank him or to compliment him back on his own outfit: a loose graphic white shirt of a band you recognised paired with denim ripped jeans with chains hanging off the sides and a pair of doc martens on his feet. His signature leather jacket, one you’ve seen multiple times before in class, drapes across his shoulders. 
He does look good (really good, but you won’t admit that part.)
As you open your mouth, surprisingly finding the confidence to compliment him on his own outfit choice, it gets taken away from you when Areum announces her return as she comes towards you with drinks in her hand, followed by Minjun, Xiaojun and Mark who decided to tag along. 
You smile when Areum passes you a fresh drink, completely forgetting about the other that had become lukewarm in your hand and you’re unsure on what to do with it until it’s plucked from your grasp and you turn to look at Donghyuck who had taken it from you, clinking the can against your own in a small ‘cheers’ before he pushes himself off of the wall, his shoulder brushing yours as he heads back to where he originally came from.
You’re a little confused on why he left, watching as he drops down on the sofa beside Yangyang who looks like he’s exhausted, slouching against the sofa cushions and nodding to whatever Shotaro—you remembered him from when Areum pointed him out—was talking about and Donghyuck takes the joint from between his fingers, leaning against Yangyang as he takes a drag all while watching you.
It’s almost deja vu, the whole scene reminding you of earlier when he was looking at you from afar before he came on over to introduce himself. You find him odd, extremely odd, but you can’t deny the fact how intriguing he is. 
“So,” Areum’s voice grabs your attention. “How was it?”
“Fine,” You quip, turning to face the four. “He seemed fine. Nothing about that conversation screamed ‘I’m obsessed with you’ so, I think you were wrong with that one.”
Mark almost drops his beer, the alcohol sloshing and spilling over his hands as it almost slips from his fingers as he stares at you in shock, mouth agape, “Dude… you’re the next target?”
You deadpan, “Can you stop calling me a target? It feels like I’m about to get assassinated.” 
Xiaojun frowns, giving you a look of sympathy as he steps in closer to pat your back comfortingly, “You poor thing… my condolences. Stay strong, soldier.”
"Be quiet."
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An hour or two later you find yourself standing outside to get some fresh air alone, staring down at the liquid in your cup. You’re not sure how many you’ve had but you hate how you’re unable to feel the buzz that’s affecting those who are around you, glancing up at the few strays of people that are stumbling across the well-kept grass or are giggling to themselves as they stare up at the star filled sky. 
You wonder at first if the drink you have isn’t actually alcoholic, but from the reactions of your friends (who had been drinking the same brand with you the majority of the night.) they were already tipsy, or in Xiaojun’s case, drunk.
Maybe you just weren’t feeling it.
First college party jitters, Areum had called it when you had confided in her about the problem and you were undoubtedly embarrassed to hear her call it that, but she had reassured you that it was fine and that it was normal, and even she had experienced something similar when she came to her first college party at the beginning of the year. 
Still, it made you feel embarrassed.
With a heavy sigh, you finish the rest of your drink, pulling a face at the burn that trickles down the back of your throat as you turn on your heel to head back inside where your friends are but you crash into something hard, causing you to stumble backwards in shock and a pair of hands come out to grab your elbows, steadying you on your feet.
“Careful, princess.” The person speaks. Any other time, the pet name would’ve made you flustered, especially with that deep tone, but you barely acknowledge it as you try to shake yourself out of your startled state and you wince when you put too much pressure on your ankle, figuring you must’ve twisted it awkwardly when you bumped into the stranger. 
You curse under your breath as you feel the throb but you try not to pay too much attention to it as you finally meet eyes with Donghyuck who is already staring back at you, the grip he has on your elbows tightening slightly as you make eye contact with him. 
“I’m sorry.” You apologise instantly, “I didn’t see you.”
“It’s okay,” Donghyuck dismisses it with a shake of his head and his attention drops down to your ankle, his brows pulling together. “Did you hurt yourself?”
“Oh, yeah, just a bit. But it’s fine, honest—” 
The words get caught at the back of your throat as Donghyuck kneels down onto the grass to inspect the damage, cold fingers delicately touching your leg and trailing down to your ankle, the sudden action causing goosebumps to rise to your skin and you can just make out the corner of his lips twitching.
He traces the area with the pads of his fingertips slowly, suddenly aware of how close he’s leaning in as you feel his breath fan over your calf. His hand takes a hold of your ankle gently and carefully not to hurt you, the delicate strokes of his thumb sending a shiver up your spine and you wonder if he notices how nervous you’ve become.
Donghyuck presses his fingers down on a certain spot on your ankle and you hiss in surprise at the throb that comes with it, your hand instinctively slapping down on his shoulder in retaliation for the pain he caused but your mouth drops open in surprise while he glances up at you with a grin, eyes twinkling with amusement. 
“It’s not broken or anything,” He informs you before you could start to apologise again for your sudden actions, raising back up onto his feet. “You just twisted it awkwardly when you bumped into me.”
“Do you major in nursing alongside music or something?”
Donghyuck smiles at that, a laugh leaving his lips. “No. I’m just good at knowing my way around a body,” You immediately pick up the suggestive tone in his voice and your brows raise in surprise, feeling flustered and shy under his gaze that doesn’t waver from you. “You know, that’s the second time you’ve crashed into me—”
“Accidently.”
“Right,” He hums. “What’s that saying? Once is a mistake, twice is a coincidence—”
“And three times is a pattern,” You finish. “It’s not a coincidence or pattern. Both are mistakes. I don’t go walking around searching for you in hopes to bump into you.”
“Aw, that’s a shame.”
“That I’m not purposely bumping into you?”
“That you’re not searching around for me.”
Your face grows hot at his forwardness and your eyes flick downwards to a patch of grass you suddenly find interest in, the shyness that creeps upon you making it hard for you to look at him.
Donghyuck remains staring at you and the corner of his lips curl into a smirk, amused at how easily you seem to be flustered when it comes to him already. He basks in it, he loves knowing how much he affects you and it excites him even more when he dips his head to meet your eyes but you avert your attention elsewhere. 
He dips his hand into his jean pocket to pull out a singular pack of cigarettes, “Do you want one?”
“I don’t smoke.”
Donghyuck pauses, his fingers ghosting over the opening of the pack. “Do you mind if I smoke?”
You frown and that's when you look up to meet his eyes, confused. “Why wouldn’t I mind?”
“Some people don’t like being around smokers,” Donghyuck shrugs. “The smell and all.”
“I’m at a party where the air reeks of cigarettes, weed and alcohol,” You point out, a smile slowly starting to form on your lips. “I wouldn’t be here if I minded the smell. And besides, I can smell the weed on your clothes from earlier too and I haven’t said a word about it. I’m fine.”
He blinks once, twice, “Do I smell bad?”
“No,” You rush out to reassure him, shaking your head. “No, not at all. You smell fine.”
“Just fine?”
“You smell good.” You correct yourself.
The smirk returns as he tilts his head to the side, “Yeah?”
You come to a conclusion that he definitely enjoys making you embarrassed and flustered, and you let out a breathy laugh, tongue prodding at your cheek in slight annoyance at how easy it is for him to make you feel this way. 
If it was anyone else, you fight back. You always fight back. Being roommates with Areum and close friends with Minjun, Xiaojun, Mark and Jihoon had made you defensive, being a victim to their countless teasing and jokes you had learned over time to return it. 
But unfortunately there is something about Donghyuck that makes your words get caught in the back of your throat and your mind go completely blank, unable to think properly or even say something back.
“Whose is this?” Donghyuck’s already changing the subject, almost giving you whiplash at how easily he can switch to different topics without hesitating or missing a beat. His fingers reach out to touch Minjun’s jacket that’s draped over your shoulders, something that he had given you to keep you warm while you stepped outside. Donghyuck hums, brows pulling together. “You weren’t wearing this earlier.”
“Oh.” Your own fingers graze over the leather jacket. “It’s Minjun’s.”
Donghyuck drily asks, “Who?”
“He’s a friend.”
Donghyuck clicks his tongue against his teeth with a hum, “Yeah, well, your friend's jacket is covering this pretty dress of yours.”
The tone in his voice made your brows raise in surprise, the slight annoyance and disapproval of Minjun’s jacket covering—what he claims—a pretty dress was something you weren’t expecting, although it made your chest blossom with warmth and your face grew hot at the subtle compliment. 
He’s not speaking now, which makes you feel a bit awkward having to stand in silence with him, minus the music that’s blasting from inside the house and a few lingering people out in the garden that are having drunken conversations around you. His lips are pressing together tightly, jaw locking and unlocking as his brows furrow as if he’s thinking deeply about something, fidgeting in his spot with his fingers twitching around his own jacket after he retracted them from Minjun’s. 
You think maybe it’s time for you to leave, to say your goodbyes and find your friends so you can be free of the awkward tension you’re feeling. You want to stay with him though, not exactly eager to disappear away from him so soon just like how he practically walked away from you earlier when the others had come to join the conversation.
“Do you want another drink?” You catch yourself asking him before you could ever register the question in your head and your heart thumps wildly in your chest as Donghyuck slowly turns to look at you, “I mean, I noticed your hands are empty—and I want another drink too, so…”
Donghyuck stares at you for a moment longer before a smile breaks out onto his lips and he nods, agreeing to get another drink from the kitchen with you. But what you didn’t expect was Donghyuck to hold out his hand, wiggling his fingers enticingly in the air to coax you into taking his hand in your own. 
You’re hesitant to take it, not wanting him to feel how clammy your palms already are and you most definitely didn’t want to embarrass yourself for being so nervous during this entire interaction.
“I don’t bite, you know,” He says with a whisper and it sends shivers tingling down your spine at how close he leans in to tell you that. He tilts his head to the side as he smirks, “Unless—”
“DONGHYUCK!” 
The unfamiliar voice that shouts out his name startles you and your head whips around so fast you swear you hear a crack, immediately noticing a pretty, long haired girl stumble out of the backdoor of the house, almost tripping over her own heels before she collects herself, bringing her hand up to her forehead and squinting as she scans the garden for the boy in question. 
You slowly face Donghyuck again and he’s still looking at you, not even paying attention to the calls of his name that echo throughout the garden, not even flinching at the loudness. He’s still holding his hand out to you, waiting for you to take it so you could both go inside but you feel as if maybe it’s the wrong thing to do right now, looking back and forth between him and the girl.
You state, “Someone is calling for you.”
“I know, she’s drunk, ignore her,” Donghyuck dismisses it with a shake of his head and he reaches out further towards you, fingertips brushing over the top of your hand. “Let’s go get that drink, princess. Yeah?”
You don’t even get the chance to decide to accept or decline as the girl approaches you both and immediately throws herself at Donghyuck and punches his arm repeatedly, rambling about something that he had kept hidden from ‘the rest of them’ and she even goes as far as shoving her hand into the front pocket of his jeans.
You blink away awkwardly, unsure of what to do or even to say but you look back at the pair when she pulls out a small bag of weed with a wail of victory.
“I knew you fucking had it,” She hisses, landing another punch on his arm and he rolls his eyes, trying to snatch it out of her grasp but she pulls it away quickly out of his reach, almost bumping into you in the process and her eyes widen in surprise. “Shit, I’m sorry!”
You shake your head, “It’s fi—”
“Miwoo.” Donghyuck speaks her name through gritted teeth and it instantly rings a bell, remembering that she was one of the girls that Areum had told you about earlier, one of Donghyuck’s best friends exes. “Why don’t you take the weed and go share it with Yangyang? Yeah?”
“You’re really pretty,” Miwoo completely ignores Donghyuck to compliment you, eyes checking you out from head to toe with a smile that makes you feel a little flustered but it disappears, replacing with a grimace as she jabs her thumb back at Donghyuck, “Why are you talking to him?”
Donghyuck’s hand comes up to rub the bridge of his nose, seemingly getting frustrated with his friends words and you can’t help but smile at that, finding the situation a little comical and you watch as Donghyuck manages to get her attention, the pair getting warped into a miniature argument that has you trying to bite back your amusement, pressing your lips together tightly to try and not smile even wider.
Although, your watching moment is cut short when you hear Areum call out your name and you turn to look over your shoulder to see her beckoning your forwards and you nod, wanting to politely bid your goodbyes to Donghyuck and Miwoo but you decide against it when you them at each other's throats with petty insults, quickly making your escape to Areum who loops your arms with hers, tugging you back into the house where the others are patiently waiting for you.
Donghyuck notices your disappearance almost immediately and his shoulders drop with a sigh, glaring at Miwoo who isn’t the least affected by his darkened gaze as she dips her fingers inside the baggy to pull out a pre-rolled joint.
“You’re unbelievable.”
“I know,” Miwoo grins before she meets Donghyuck’s eye, “She’s really pretty.”
“Yeah, I know,” Donghyuck mumbles under his breath, tongue prodding at his cheek in annoyance as he rips the bag and the joint out of Miwoo’s hands. “Give me that. You don’t deserve it, asshole.”
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The amusement on your face is obvious when Xiaojun and Mark step into the Dreamies Café, both dressed in oversized hoodies and wearing sunglasses to block out the brightness of the sun and the lights from burning their eyes, arms dangling at their sides as they drag their feet across the flooring towards the table where you and Jihoon are sat waiting for them. 
You arrived ten minutes before the two of them did and you were surprised to already see Jihoon sitting at the table with everyone's preferred drinks, and even when you tried to hand over the money for your own, he just looked at you as if you deeply offended him and swatted your hand away before pulling out a chair and telling you to sit.  
Xiaojun doesn’t seep a word as he slumps down in the seat opposite you, but he does gesture a quick thank you to Jihoon for the drink and he lifts the straw to his lips to take a long sip, chest rumbling with a satisfied hum as he relaxes into his seat, the ice clinking in his iced matcha as he continuous to drink.
“Hey,” Mark greets you both as he sits on the seat at the end of the table, fingers curling around the plastic cup of his watermelon ade as he glances over at Jihoon. “Thanks, man. I’ll venmo you the money.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Jihoon dismisses with a wave of his hand. “It’s on me anyways. You paid for my drink last time we were here,” His gaze suddenly flicks over to Xiaojun, the corner of his lips twitching. “You look like shit.”
“I feel like shit,” Xiaojun grumbles, craning his head back. “But fuck those cocktails tasted good.”
“You know, you’re probably going to have to give Jeno the money back for raiding his stash.”
“Actually, it belonged to Yangyang,” Xiaojun corrects as he digs his hand through the front of his jean pockets, pulling out his phone and swiping up to get to his notification bar and he angles the screen towards the three of you with a grimace. “He dmed me on Instagram this morning telling me to pay him back but I’m not even going to open it.”
“Dude,” Mark gives him a pointed look. “You can’t do that.”
“But I can,” Xiaojun locks his phone and places it down on the table with a grin. “And I will.”
Jihoon murmurs, “But you drank his stuff without his permission.”
“He uses my laptop in classes without my permission!” Xiaojun argues back immediately, “It’s payback.”
“You shouldn’t have given him your password.”
“I didn’t. I gave it to Donghyuck because he wanted—” Xiaojun suddenly pauses, blinking a few times as he registers his own words before smacking his lips together with a nod, exhaling deeply through his nose. “Yeah. That’s my fault. Should’ve guessed Donghyuck wouldn’t keep his mouth shut about that.”
The mention of Donghyuck has you thinking back on last night and a subtle smile makes its way onto your lips, twisting the straw of your coffee in between your teeth as you go over the interaction in your head.
The smirk he always has, the tone of his voice as he speaks to you, the way he always keeps eye contact and doesn’t even falter once when something else is going on around him. His somewhat flirtatious comments and his lingering touches is what surprises you the most, but you tell yourself that maybe that’s just his personality. 
He’s like that with everyone, he must be.
“What’s got you smiling over there?” A teasing voice breaks you out of your thoughts, startling you as your head shoots up and you see Xiaojun grinning at you across the table, chin resting on the palm of his hand as he waits for you to explain the reason for your smiling but you remain tight lipped, causing his grin to drop. “Don’t be like that.”
“Don’t be nosy.” You fire back jokingly.
A soft call of your name makes you turn your head to Jihoon, “Did you enjoy the party yesterday?”
“It was fine,” You nod your head. “Didn’t get as drunk as everyone else did, but it was fine. College parties can be kind of overwhelming though,” You scratch the back of your neck awkwardly as you admit, “I don’t know why but I didn’t expect that many people to be there…”
“Yeah, Jeno is pretty well-known,” Mark hums as he takes a sip through his straw, leaning back in his seat comfortably. “Don’t get me wrong, like, that entire group are pretty much well-known but it’s mainly Jeno that gets the most attention and rallies everyone up for parties.”
“Areum kind of explained everything to me about them last night,” You say. “They’re an interesting group, I think. They also come across as a little intimidating apart from Shotaro… he was just smiling the entire night.”
“Shotaro’s sweet,” Mark agrees, nodding his head. “Also, once you get to really know them, they aren’t that intimidating—”
“I don’t know about that. Renjun still makes my skin crawl.” Xiaojun interrupts with a shiver.
“Renjun’s just not a people person,” Mark explains with a shrug of his shoulders. “He’s actually really nice if you have a one on one conversation with him,” Mark then turns his attention back on you, “But seriously, none of them are that intimidating once you get to really know them or be around them. Take Yangyang and Donghyuck for example, we don’t find either of them ‘intimidating’ since we share a class with them.”
“They’re just annoying,” Xiaojun chimes in again with a grimace on his face. “Especially Yangyang.”
You can’t help but chuckle at that, “What’s your problem with Yangyang?”
“Yangyang likes to annoy people a lot,” Jihoon is the one to explain to you as Xiaojun rubs at his temples at the mere thought of Yangyang. “He enjoys getting on people's nerves and, fortunately for him, Xiaojun reacts to everything he does so that just makes him do it even more… although, he hasn’t really been doing anything lately. He’s just been kinda numbed out.”
You hum, “Areum also mentioned that he indulges himself into some hard shit, alongside the weed and the alcohol.”
“That’s heartbreak for you, I guess.” Mark mumbles under his breath with a frown, tone sullen and your brows pull together in confusion, wanting to question it a little bit more but you struggle to find the opportunity when another topic is brought up.
“And obviously you know so much about Donghyuck already.”
“No I don’t,” You snip, sending a hard look Xiaojun’s way as he bats his pretty eyelashes at you. You repeat, “No I don’t”
“You were outside in the garden with him for quite some time last night~”
“I’m surprised you even remembered that considering when I walked back into the house, you were on your eighth shot dancing with one of the kitchen chairs.”
“Hey,” Xiaojun points his finger at you, “I may have been drunk but this brain of mine remembers everything.” He then smiles at you, “What did you guys talk about? Did he mention that you’re now his new obsession?”
Jihoon almost spits out his drink, “You’re his new obsession?”
“Why do you all call it that?” You huff with a frown, leaning back in your seat with your arms crossed over your chest. “It sounds mean—and wrong.”
“It’s kinda the truth,” Mark gives you a sorry expression. “Donghyuck does get obsessed with people and I’m almost positive he even knows it himself… He falls for people hard and he becomes so infatuated with them until they say they want nothing to do with him, and he just… stops.”
“He was into Aisha before,” Xiaojun states but you already knew that from Areum’s previous explanation. “He liked her a lot and I’m pretty sure she was into it for a while considering she flirted back and there were even rumours that they hooked up, like, once or twice… but I guess she got bored with that so she made up a lie and told Donghyuck that she was dating Mark—”
“Me. Of all people.” Mark points to himself in disbelief and shakes his head, the expression on his face being enough to get a laugh out of you. 
“I mean, I would believe it,” Jihoon shrugs his shoulders, causing Mark to look at him incredulously. “Come on, you once walked out of a bathroom with her at a Halloween party with your spider-man costume unzipped and your mask gone—”
“I had to fucking piss really bad and I couldn’t get out of the costume because I was drunk so she helped me,” Mark immediately defends himself, a pout forming on his lips. “Besides, it was hot, I wasn’t going to wear the mask all night.” He then fires back up, “I wouldn’t fuck someone in dingy club’s disgusting bathroom, dude!”
Xiaojun blinks, “You lost your virginity in a cheap motel room with your ex-girlfriend.”
Mark bites back, “You lost yours in your grandma's basement, shut up.”
“Okay, wow, uncalled for.”
“Don’t argue…” Jihoon sighs, rubbing his forehead at their raised voices and your brows raise as the pair both turn to look at Jihoon with blank expressions before they speak in sync.
“You lost yours in the college janitor closet and got caught.”“Wait, really?” You gape at Jihoon in shock, not expecting someone like a quiet and socially awkward Jihoon to do something so scandalous on campus grounds. But your shock dies down and morphs into shyness when you realise the trio are now looking at you, expecting you to chime in with your own embarrassing virginity story but the problem was, you had none. Your virginity is still intact.
“Do you not have one?” Mark questions after a few minutes of awkward silence and you shake your head, avoiding his eyes. He questions genuinely again, not a hint of teasing in his tone as he whispers quietly. “Are you a virgin?”
You nod.
“Aww…” Xiaojun coos softly, causing your head to snap towards him as he smiles sweetly at you, “That’s cute.”
Your face immediately burns with embarrassment as you sink further down into your seat, a deep frown settling on your lips, “Don’t ever call my virginity cute again.”
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“Wow… I’m immensely impressed,” Professor Kim mumbles under his breath as he slips the headphones off of his head after listening to a little recording you had made on your computer, his lips curled into satisfied grin as he places the headphones down on the table and you beam happily, glancing between him and your computer screen. “I’m also really impressed that you finished this today. I was expecting you to show me the finished product by at least next week… I’m grateful that you take this class seriously.”
“I enjoy music,” You tell him honestly as you tap your fingers nervously on your desk, “Is there anything I need to change or to work on?”
“There’s nothing you need to work on, it sounds great,” He compliments yet you prepare yourself for the rest, “But for changes? I would like to encourage you to partner up with some of the other students in the class, work together on a piece and let your music styles blend together to see how well it compliments each other, or even try and create something new.”
“So, like a group project?”
“Exactly,” Professor Kim nods. “Like I said, you’re impressive. You’re an amazing guitarist and pianist, your music is incredible when you’re solo. But I would like to hear it within a group too. Yangyang is an incredible bass player that you can maybe add. Xiaojun and Aisha are amazing vocalists, Donghyuck too and he’s also great at the guitar. Jihoon is talented with the keyboard and Mark can do just about everything. Seriously, think about it. I would love to hear how you sound within a group.”
With a kind smile and a gentle pat to your shoulder, Professor Kim excuses himself to go talk to another student, leaving you alone to think about his words.
It’s not that you didn’t want to work in a group. You’re almost positive that working with your friends will be a fun type of chaotic mess that will have your stomach cramping and tears streaming down your cheeks from laughing so much.
It’s just that you didn’t know how to work in a group. You’ve always been independent in some sort of sense, especially with your own creations. You preferred sitting alone with your headphones snug on your head, testing out different sounds and techniques all by yourself, choosing what sounds best and what suits your needs.
But working in a group? Settling on one thing that will make each of you happy? That is foreign territory… that is stressful.
“So, what did he say to you?” Jihoon asks with a gentle nudge at your shoulder to get your attention and you pull your eyes away from your laptop screen to give him a tight lipped smile.
“He liked it. He just wants me to try out group work,” You almost start pleading, “Got any room in your group project for me to fit in?”
“Sure,” Jihoon nods with a kind smile, “Although I feel like I should probably warn you by saying that sometimes it’s not just me, Mark and Xiaojun working together… Donghyuck and Yangyang sometimes come back and forth, especially for Mark.”
Your brows raise in surprise, “They’re in your group too?”
“Not exactly. It’s more like them coming to us when we’re working to borrow Mark for their project,” Jihoon explains to you as he nods over at Mark who’s currently leaning on a desk with Donghyuck and Yangyang at his sides, peering over his shoulder to look at his laptop screen. “Mark pretty much floats in and out of other people's groups. It’s what you get for being an allrounder I guess.”
“Professor Kim mentioned something like that.” You mumble as you watch the trio, the corner of your lips twitching upwards in a slight smile as Mark scoffs at something Donghyuck says, swatting him away with his hand as Donghyuck grins mischievously and murmurs something in his ear, causing Mark to push at his head this time and Donghyuck stumbles back with a laugh.
Yangyang remains silent, idly drumming his fingers on the desk and rubbing tiredly at his sullen eyes beneath his hood. He seems to stop when turning his body towards you, as if looking your way to which makes your back straighten up, especially when Donghyuck’s head whips around at a mumble from Yangyang, looking directly at you. 
From across the room, Donghyuck smiles that crooked grin of his and his eyebrow quirks up when he sees that you’re already staring back at him. You can feel the warmth rising to your cheeks at being caught, and though you try to suppress the shy feeling that creeps in, you know he can already tell exactly how you’re feeling as his eyes twinkle with amusement, tilting his head to the side as if to tease you even more.
Donghyuck’s eyes never leave you as you turn away, trying to busy yourself with something else as your heart thumps wildly in your ears, feeling too overwhelmed to glance back at Donghyuck despite seeing him in your peripheral vision.
“You really have caught his attention,” Jihoon mutters beside you with a chuckle and you whip around to face him, eyes wide. “I thought that maybe Xiaojun and Mark were teasing you… but I guess Donghyuck really has started to take a liking to you. You are his new obsession.”
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1K notes · View notes
myfictionaldreams · 1 year
Note
Hey, can you do something with where the reader is pregnant in mafia stucky and Bucky and Steve are super protective about her?
Xoxo
Our Little Bean // Mafia!Stucky x Fem!Reader
A/N: Thank you for your request, this has been requested quite a few times by many people so I hope you do enjoy!
Important note for readers: I'm currently working within maternity services within the UK so the pregnancy side of this is all based on a UK perspective but it's set in the US so apologies if anything is different over there. Also, the signs and symptoms are based on my bestie's pregnancy so thank you for letting me use these!
ALSO: I'm sorry if I don't do any more pregnancy/baby fics, I wanted to just do this one and return to the normal trio we had before.
Tags: 18+ readers only, unplanned pregnancy, fluff (LOTS!), comfort, soft steve/bucky, protectiveness, pregnancy kink, pet names, pregnancy symptoms discussed in detail, crying, family/domestic fluff, tooth-rotting goodness!
Words: 6.9k
my masterlist 📚 AO3 Link
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Your nausea never seemed to settle, barely being able to keep down dry toast or sips of water and then there was the immense exhaustion, finding yourself to be lucky if you were awake for an hour before falling asleep again. This, paired with the dizzy spells and dull aches in your temples, it was safe to say that you were done with feeling unwell and you definitely blamed Sam Wilson for this. He’d turned up to work last week feeling unwell, slightly different symptoms to yours as he had a head cold but ill nonetheless and now, here you were, collapsed onto the couch in the living room, under a mount of blankets.
It wasn’t all bad however as Bucky had stayed home to look after you and he was doing a good job of it too, but he and Steve were always extra attentive when you were unwell and had been taking it in turns to stay home, with Steve having stayed with you yesterday.
Bucky today had helped you wash, changed into fresh pyjamas and then carried downstairs, tucking you into your little fort before sitting on the floor and reading the book you were halfway through reading. You were too tired to read and didn’t want to keep your eyes open so Bucky offered, which was hilarious to hear him trying to read along and then asking questions as to the type of books you’ve been reading.
“So who is this Rhysand guy? Just some hotshot king or something?” he asked, lowering the book to look at your resting face. You smiled tiredly at his question, opening one eye to look into his confused expression, he was already invested in your book, even though he had started more than halfway through.
“Something like that”, you replied, voice croaking from needing water which he was quick to notice, lifting the glass with the straw to your mouth and you hummed your thanks, taking a sip and closing your eye once more.
You fell back to sleep again and woke to be carried, noticing that it was dark outside with another day passing as Steve carried you up the stairs, having returned home from work. Your arms were trapped into the blanket cocooned you were being carried in so you nuzzled your face into his neck to let him know you were awake.
Steve tilted his head, kissing the top of yours as he placed you into the centre of your shared bed, “think you’re up for eating some chicken noodle soup?”
“Did you make it?”, your voice was full of hope as you blinked open your eyes to look up at him but made no attempt to move just yet.
“Of course, only the best for you”. Steve left to retrieve your soup, giving you time for another quick snooze, before he was back and shaking your shoulders. With his help, you untangled yourself from the soft blankets and attempted to sit up but were hit with a wave of dizziness, having to stop and close your eyes to get your bearings straight before it subsided and you could sit up properly. Steve was looking at you with a knowing glance as he sat on the edge of the bed, a warm noodle soup bowl in his lap that he began to spoon-feed you - something he insisted on. “You know I’m going to call the doctor, right?”
You release a frustrated huff, you didn’t need the doctor, “It’s fine though, it’ll pass. Sam said it took him 4 days before he started to feel better and I’m only on day 3”.
“Baby, you’re on day 4 and you said this all yesterday and it’s only getting worse”, he stated everything matter-of-factly but you were still shocked that you’d somehow missed an entire day. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to see a doctor and there was no use arguing with Steve when it came to your health.
So after you’d finished half a bowl of the soup before feeling queasy, Steve excused himself to call his doctor who just so happened to be a close family friend. Of course, you had fallen asleep before the Doctor arrived and being rudely awakened made you feel even more groggy and unwell as Steve whispered, “Sorry honey, but Doctor Banner’s here to check you over”.
Steve excused himself so the Doctor could check you over properly without feeling pressured by the mafia boss in the room. Doctor Banner put you at ease though with his warming personality and you’d met him on a few occasions anyway when Steve or Bucky were more injured through an event with work, but you’d never had him look after you before.
The two of you ran through the general list, ‘When did you start feeling like this?’, ‘What are your symptoms?’, before he began doing your vital signs, temperature and blood pressure, all just normal procedures.
“Could you be pregnant?” he casually asked as he velcroed the blood pressure cuff from your arm.
Frowning you answered, “Um no…no, I’m on birth control, so I shouldn’t be”.
“Do you mind if we do a quick test just to tick it off of the list? All you need to do is pee in this cup and I’ll dip a test strip into it”.
You wobbled to the toilet on unsteady feet, realising this is probably the first time you’d properly walked in days because the boys insisted on carrying you everywhere. As you used the toilet, you didn’t think anything of the test, leaving the cup on the side for the doctor and returning back to bed, wondering if he’s going to give you some antibiotics or just see how you get on over the next few days.
After a few minutes, your eyes were closed but you could hear the Doctor returning so you asked, “So, do you think it’s just the flu like I said-”
“It’s not the flu, your test was positive”.
Your eyes snap open to look at him, sitting up and feeling dizzy but ignoring it, “what? What do you mean it’s positive?”
Doctor Bruce held up the little white strip that had two purple lines on it. You looked between the test and his face as he calmly smiled, “You’re pregnant”.
“What if the test is wrong? Can we do it again?” Thankfully he didn’t fight you on this and gave you the packet of tests, you grabbed two and stumbled back to the bathroom. Both strips gave the exact result and now it felt like your heart was coming out of your mouth it was pounding so hard and loudly in your ears.
“Take a deep breath for me”, Doctor Banner calmly instructed as he placed a steady hand on your back in case you needed extra support. You took a few deep breaths, not even realising that you had been holding your breath. Gripping onto the bathroom side, you began to feel dizzy again so he helped you back to bed waiting until you were settled before continuing.
“This explains your symptoms, I’d say you were in your early stages of pregnancy so we’ll book an appointment with the midwife tomorrow and sort out things like a scan. You may feel that your symptoms get worse over the next few weeks and if they do, you can always call me back but otherwise, stay rested and take it easy”.
You were only half listening. Midwife? Scans? Symptoms getting worse? There was so much for your brain to process. There was an actual baby inside of your body right now, a part of you and… who? Your anxiety was increasing with each second as you tried to let the words sink in as the Doctor packed his stuff away. Did you want to have a baby right now? You had always wanted kids but were you even ready at this stage of your life but then again… was anyone ready for a baby when they were accidentally knocked up?
Then the knocked-up by who question echoed through your thoughts. You obviously didn’t know if the baby was Steve's or Bucky’s, so would they be upset about this? If it was planned at least there could be some way you could arrange who to have sex with to know for sure but now… you were all in the dark about the paternity. You didn’t care if it was Steve or Bucky, you were always a trio in every sense of the word but now that this was your reality, would they be pissed off? And were they even ready for kids? The business took so much of their time and was still very dangerous but this was bound to happen eventually as you all wanted children.
Bucky and Steve had always been very open that they wanted kids, especially Bucky with his affection name for you being ‘mama’, he often would talk about his fantasy of seeing you barefoot and pregnant with his kid. So, at least you knew they were on the same page about wanting to have children but now it was the stress of is now the right time and who was the father of the baby?
You were vaguely aware of the Doctor bidding his farewells, “I’ll speak to you tomorrow and I’ll let you tell your partners the good news”. You offered a half-assed wave to him as he left, before staring at your hands in your lap, completely petrified for the next few minutes.
Steve and Bucky wandered in a few beats later, sitting on either side of you on the bed but you couldn’t look them in the eye, trying desperately to hold it together.
“Everything ok, Doll? The Doc didn’t tell us what was wrong, just said you would explain”, Bucky asked, stroking a finger down your arm to try and soothe you but it was enough to make you break.
You burst into tears, hiding your face in your hands.
“Honey? What is it? Talk to us”, Steve encouraged, attempting to pull your hands away from  your face but you held them there tightly so instead, he pulled your body into his lap, your legs over his thighs so that you could hide your face into his chest, the sobs building in intensity and everything was just so overwhelming. You were excited, scared, relieved but nervous, it was a lot to handle.
Steve and Bucky encouraged you to talk to them both, becoming more unsettled with your increasing hysterics. It took a few minutes to calm down, and it helped as Bucky held both your hands, rubbing circles into your skin and Steve wrapped his arms around your shoulders, holding you close to his body. You decided it was better to just tell them than keep it to yourself any longer.
With your face still pressed into Steve’s face, you whispered “I’m pregnant”, however, it was so muffled and quiet that neither man heard you.
“What was that sweetheart?”, Steve asked, trying to pull you away enough that both men could see your tear-stained face.
The words sounded strange coming from your mouth as you kept your head hanging lowly, mumbling, “I’m pregnant”.
You knew that they had heard this time by the way both completely froze, not even breathing as they processed the news. Bucky finally whispered, “What?”
You still couldn’t look at him, scared you’d see disappointment or anger in his eyes.
“Are you sure?” Steve asked in such a faint voice you were shocked it was even from him.
Nodding your head at his question you explained, “We checked a couple of times, he thinks I’m still in my early pregnancy but-ah!”
You jumped as Bucky all but tackled you and Steve, his lips kissing every part of your face that he could reach and when he pulled back enough to cup your cheeks, you took in the glowing grin on his face, his eyes twinkling with love as he shouted, “you’re pregnant! We’re having a baby!”
Steve then seemed to snap out of his initial shock and his arms tightened and lifted your body further up so he could kiss your face just as happily as Bucky before nuzzling into your neck, breathing you in, “I love you so much sweetheart, I can’t believe it! Wait, why were you crying, are you not excited?”
He relaxed his hold on you so that they could both see you properly and you had room to look at them both. “I... I am excited! I just wasn’t sure how you would both react as I don’t know which of you is the dad-”
Bucky leans across and kisses your lips quickly cutting off your sentence, the grin still broad across his face, “I don’t fucking care, if the baby has my genes or Steve’s, we’re all in this together, remember? That’s what we’ve agreed on”.
“So you aren’t upset?” you wanted to clarify.
“Fuck no hot mama… and you’re actually going to be a mama! This little bean is ours, all of ours!”
You were crying again with relief, “you really mean that?”
His eyes softened, kissing the corner of your mouth, “Of course I do”.
“We both mean it, I… I can’t believe it, I’ve always wanted to be a Dad”, Steve admitted, kissing your temple and as you looked up, you could see his eyes glistening with unshed tears which only made you smile and cry harder.
Steve made the move first, lowering his hand over your abdomen, resting over your stomach where there was no bump yet but knowing there was something growing inside you, he couldn’t help the relieved gasp. Bucky was quick to cover his hand and yours on the top so the three of you were feeling where the baby would be. “I can’t believe we’re going to be parents!”
The next few days were a whirlwind of excitement and unimaginable joy whilst also still feeling relatively unwell, especially feeling more exhausted as you wanted to buy every pregnancy book and read them all but soon fell asleep with it open in your lap.
Then there was Steve and Bucky who could not contain their excitement, going above and beyond for you, especially with you still feeling ill. They would cook and feed you, if you were too tired, refill your glasses of water, constantly ask if you were comfortable and more than happy to fetch another pillow if needed. Not only this, but their levels of affection had increased massively, whispering their love for you at any opportunity, holding your hands, and lots of kisses, it was so nice to feel this level of love when going through such a life-changing experience.
Both of them had been just as motivated to read about pregnancy, birth, babies, and the whole lot from A to Z, they researched everything that was possible and then gave you the rundown on what your bodily changes would be including what you couldn’t eat, vowing to not eat the same items until you could which you didn’t seem necessary but appreciated the gesture.
Then there was the excitement of going to the Midwife’s appointment and it all became so much more real again, especially being able to book the ultrasound scan. This was where you found out that you were 8 weeks and 3 days and the entire world seemed to pause around the three of you as you watched your baby's tiny heartbeat on the screen.
To say you all cried was an understatement, all of you not taking your eyes off of the scan picture that was provided, the little bean was so tiny, only just being able to tell the outline of its arms and legs. Now it felt official. You, Steve and Bucky were going to have a baby.
Many things changed including protection that increased tenfold. Security around your home doubled and you had not only Sam Wilson as your bodyguard but also Natasha. Not only this but if you attending the business or in public, Steve and Bucky would crowd around you, almost like a human shield, their overprotective instincts on overdrive, even from people who were just at the check-outs in stores. Sam and Natasha were confused by the sudden dynamic intensity and it was hard to keep it all a secret but you had all decided to wait just a little while longer and continue with your unknown illness excuse just until the baby had grown a little bit bigger.
This was something else that you had to get used to with adjusting to the many bodily changes you were going through to adapt to growing this baby. A few days following the scan, you’d come downstairs to Steve cooking you scrambled eggs which were your usual favourite breakfast but as soon as you smelt those cooking eggs, you were gagging and rushing to the toilet, throwing up violently.
Your eyes were watering as you finally stopped emptying your stomach but still gagging as you could smell the lingering eggs in the air. A warm hand rubbed circles over your back, Steve’s apologetic voice came from behind you, “Sorry, baby. No more eggs”.
This was the first instance of vomiting and it wasn’t just eggs, as every single day you would be throwing up and then feeling extremely tired afterwards that you weren’t able to do much throughout the day but be with your head in the toilet or lying in bed. The boys were almost glued to your side during this time, worried that you weren’t keeping enough food or drinks down and even had to call Doctor Banner back just to check you weren’t too dehydrated.
Thankfully you hadn’t needed to go into hospital as your vomiting subsided but the nausea remained for a while.
“You sure she’s ok? She’s looking a little peaky,” Sam commented to Steve one day as he came to help guard the house and was having his lunch with you all but he took one look at you and knew something wasn’t right, even as you forced the sandwich into your mouth, making sure to still eat for you and baby… not that Sam knew about the baby.
“Yeah, she’s fine Sam, thanks for checking though and we appreciate the extra hours you’re doing”, Steve responded with a thankful grip on his friend's shoulder.
“It’s no problem man, just worried for her that’s all, don’t really understand what’s going on with you all, especially with the extra security and whatnot and I feel like I’ve hardly spoken to her for a few weeks now. Just want you to know I’m always here if you ever need anything”.
You felt guilty when Steve later told you what Sam had said, feeling bad that you were keeping it secret but it was only for a few more weeks.
Luckily, you had found the special trick to help your nausea as suggested by a friend: lavender! After sitting with a bag of dried lavender for a couple of hours and not feeling nauseous, Steve and Bucky were quick to fill the entire house with lavender-scented items including candles and sprays, even having some in the car and it helped to settle your nausea massively.
But, as soon as one symptom passed, another would be replacing the uncomfortable feeling. The next was your breasts becoming incredibly painful and sore, even if you accidentally knocked them when putting on a bra or rolling over in your sleep, it was agony. Your boyfriends were even more careful with you during this phase, getting ice to hold against them during particularly painful moments and being careful to give you enough room when asleep.
A couple of weeks later was the first day you noticed the little bean kicking, at first it felt like maybe gas, almost like there were butterflies fluttering in your tummy but then you finally realised what it was. The feeling grew stronger with each day as well as the size of your growing stomach which was something Steve and Bucky were going absolutely feral for. They would take pictures each week to show your progression and would constantly be placing their hands on your stomach, even if the bump wasn’t that noticeable just yet.
The midwife recommended talking to the baby at one point so every night, you would sit with a shirt off and Steve and Bucky would lie on either side of you, taking it in turns to tell stories, sing their favourite songs and lay sweet kisses along the growing bump. One day, Bucky was telling the little bean about the time he and Steve snuck into a movie theatre when the skin under his cheek poked out as the baby kicked him in the face. Bucky sat up with excitement, it being the first time he had properly felt the baby move as he cooed, “there's our strong baby, good job little bean!”
“You hit the right dad as well”, Steve joked causing Bucky to smack him in the shoulder.
“Don’t listen to Dad, listen to Pops, I’m right here to make everything’s ok”, Bucky continued to speak sweetly to your stomach.
Your heart swelled at the difference in names that he had seemed to pick, “is that what you’d like to be called?” you asked them both, stroking a finger across each of their cheeks, feeling the stubble beneath.
“It’s perfect”, Steve beamed, kissing your stomach again.
Now it was your 20-week scan, Baby was so much bigger, you couldn’t believe the difference those weeks had made since the last scan. Now it was really starting to look like a baby with longer limbs and you were even able to find out the gender, however, you had wanted to wait to find out, liking the thought of it being announced at the birth.
With these beautiful new prints of the scans, you finally wanted to tell people, beginning with your closest friends.
It was a casual lunchtime meal at the office. You sat at the large table in between Steve and Bucky, with Sam and Natasha sitting opposite, all idly talking and eating the take-out that Steve had bought. However you had opted for a different meal: 4 packs of salt and vinegar chips and a tub of tomatoes - both were your latest cravings.
Sam eyed your food wearily, “Interesting mix you’ve got there, boss lady?”
Your only response was smiling with your cheeks full of tomatoes as Bucky placed his hand over your thigh. You knew he wanted to put his hand on your stomach but you hadn’t told either of the people across the table just yet and even though your bump was starting to become noticeable now, you were trying to hide it behind baggy shirts but even that was becoming difficult. You were in desperate need of some new trousers as well as the button was digging into your skin as you shifted uncomfortably, looking at each of your boys, feeling antsy with excitement as well.
“Can we tell them? I really need to take off my trousers, I’m feeling really claustrophobic”.
Sam frowned at your random sentence, confused by what you meant however it was Natasha’s reaction that sparked your interest as she smirked, leaning back in her chair with a tilt of the head. You looked at her with a gaped-open mouth, pointing your finger at her, “You already know! Who told her?” you asked, looking between Bucky and Steve.
“Wasn’t me”, they both responded at the same time, holding up their hands as you eyed them both suspiciously.
Natasha leaned forward in her chair, “did you really think that I wouldn’t notice? I’m offended Sugar, it’s in my job description to be observant. In fact, you should be asking if Sam is right to keep this job if he can’t notice something this obvious”, she teased the man sitting next to her who still looked just as confused as before.
You laugh at Sam’s reaction, looking to Steve who handed you the sealed cards. You happily took them, standing from your chair and feeling Bucky’s hand on your lower back to help and then walked around the table, giving them both a card each. It wasn’t anything special or elaborate, but it had a picture of the latest scan with the statement: “Update to your job title; bodyguard & uncle/auntie”.
You’d never heard the high-pitched tone from Sam ever before as he quickly stood, his chair squeaking across the floor as he shouted, “What?!” He turned to you, looking between you, the picture and Steve and Bucky, “Really?!”
You pulled the back of your shirt so the material was tight to your front, showing off your growing bump, grinning as he shouted “Congratulations!”, before pulling you into a huge hug, careful of your belly but rocking the two of you on the spot a few times and kissing your temple, “I can’t believe I’m going to be an uncle again!”
Sam was then pushed aside, giving room for Natasha, “Move it, Wilson, I want to meet my niece or nephew”, Sam didn’t mind being moved as he rushed around to embrace Steve and Bucky.
Natasha hugged you tightly, and you were able to ask, “How long have you known?”
“A couple of weeks, you aren’t as subtle as you think at hiding things. I mean, you’ve hardly been awake enough to have a conversation, this is the most lively I’ve seen you in nearly a month. And that's without the new obsessive protecting from Steve and Bucky, how they’re always touching you and the weird food you’re eating, it’s more noticeable than you think it is”. She pulls back to put her hands on your growing bump, “how many weeks are you?”
“20 weeks and 5 days, I can feel the little bean moving more with each day, I feel so big already and I’m not even showing that much considering I’m only halfway through my pregnancy”. Natasha grinned hearing this, looking at your little bump. “Now you both know, I can take off my pants without being judged”, you groaned as you undid your jeans button, utter relief when they were completely removed from your body and felt free, your shirt was long enough that it stopped mid-thigh so you weren’t too unmodest.
Bucky had snuck behind you, his arms wrapping around to rest on your stomach as he kissed your cheek. Natasha smiled watching the embrace as she remarked, “Guess you got what you wanted all along Barnes, now you can call her mama and she actually is one”.
“Mmm absolutely”, Bucky nuzzled into your neck, the sensation making you laugh as it tickled, turning to shy away from his attack but he only held you tighter until you melted into his arms.
Steve and Sam joined your little gathering and Sam jokingly asked, “So if the baby’s a boy, can we name him Sam?”
You were so thankful for the news being out, especially as this meant that you could go baby clothes shopping with Sam and Natasha, finding little outfits that you could surprise your boyfriends with. It was one of the only things you were able to do for them to show your appreciation as they did so much for you throughout your pregnancy.
Your cravings continued to become stronger with each day and often found yourself waking in the middle of the night to find something to quench the craving for something acidic and sour taste you needed so desperately it felt like your world was going to end if you didn’t eat it right then and there. On multiple occasions, Steve or Bucky would come downstairs in the early hours of the morning to find you sitting on the kitchen floor, your belly round and exposed, hating feeling material against your skin, and a scattering of different foods surrounding you, a happy smile on your face.
“You ok down there beautiful?” they would ask with grins that matched yours and with your heightened emotions you would be crying before long, reaching for them to come and sit with you which they would do eagerly, pulling your body in between there legs and kissing away your tears, “don’t cry pretty girl, I’ve got you”.
If you ever run out of your favourite cravings, they would drive to the store and you were buzzing to go along for the ride in the middle of the night, fully awake and ready for the night time adventure only to fall asleep before getting to the store.
Entering into the third trimester, your belly was round and heavy, things for sure were becoming more difficult for you as the little bean grew. There were small excitements still like attending antenatal classes with your boyfriends who were taking their role as dad and pops  very seriously, you’d never seen them concentrate so hard before.
“You’re doing the boss face again”, you whispered to Steve as he correctly wrapped the baby doll in a blanket. Steve's features softened immediately as he sheepishly looked at you from the corner of his eye.
“I’m just trying to concentrate”, he mumbled, eyes returning to looking at the doll, his fingers trembling slightly as he continued wrapping steadily.
Reaching across you grabbed his hands, keeping your voice low to keep the conversation between the two of you, “I’m scared too, but you’re going to be a great dad, Steve, you’ll be ok”.
This was a little pep talk you needed to have with both Bucky and Steve on numerous occasions as they began panicking that this was actually happening and whilst you reminded them there was nothing they could do to take back the growing baby in your belly, it was ok to have nerves, but everything would come to them with time, they needed to stay strong, especially as you were also sort of beginning to lose it.
Your body was really changing to accommodate the growing little bean. Your hands and feet were swollen until your shoes couldn’t fit anymore and god…the heartburn was excruciating, and nearly as painful as the kicks to the ribs. There was never a moment where you weren’t out of breath, even standing to pour cereal into a bowl took all of your energy and you’d be sighing in relief as you sat down. Your hips hurt, your back was in agony, and the pregnancy fun had well and truly finished.
This was where the boys really shined through as they would massage your hands and feet, they would be more then happy to cook or grab anything for you, picking things off of the ground, finding clothes that might fit and then there were their compliments which was one thing keeping you going.
Steve and Bucky could not get enough of seeing you pregnant, “you’re glowing honey, pregnancy suits you so much, my love”. You never felt like you were glowing and would describe yourself instead as a huge, hungry, tired monster but the way the boys looked at you, put those negative thoughts to the back of your mind.
From the moment you woke up to the second sleep would invade your consciousness, they would remind you of their love, needing you to fully comprehend how much they appreciated you growing their baby, you were doing so much for them, putting your body through it, for all of you, for the little bean.
Their words definitely helped when you began to feel needier in more than one way as your hormones caused your arousal to be one-minute non-existence and the next feeling nearly overwhelmed with how badly you needed to touch them and be touched. Thankfully with how obsessed they were with you during your pregnancy, they were more than happy to deliver. Hands would be all over, their lips leaving words of affirmation against your warm skin, being careful not to be to rough and more than happy if you wanted to take control and do whatever you wanted to them.
You had to be honest and say you never felt more loved up before. Even with the gang still in full operation, they were able to look after you as their number one priority, even through your emotional breakdowns, or weird pregnancy habits that had you thinking you were slightly insane but they never judged once.
For example, towards the end of your pregnancy, you had a completely immense craving to chew on your bath sponge every time you sat in the large bathtub. So when one day Steve walked in with a freshly warmed-up towel and caught you mid-chew with staring eyes, you expected his reaction to being anything but a soft smile, “You having fun in there, baby?”
Pulling the sponge out of your mouth slowly you nervously answered, “I uh… I don’t really know how to explain…”
Steve held up a hand, “You don’t have to explain anything, whatever makes you happy and I think I’ve read in a book that sometimes pregnant women can have cravings like this, whatever makes you happy”.
As your due date closened, you sat in the centre of the large bed, watching Bucky shuffle his way through your clothes, trying to find the right things to pack for your hospital bag. “What about this?” he asked, holding up a pair of your normal jeans.
“They haven’t fit me in four months, Bucky”, you laughed, shaking your head. “I need pyjamas or baggy shirts, things that can be easily taken on and off, maybe you should just leave Steve to do it”, you suggested whilst holding out your arms.
Bucky shrugged, dropping the jeans and jumping onto the bed, making you squeal with the bed moving up and down before he had his hands against your bump, kissing the tip of your nose. “Not long until we meet you little bean”, he was rewarded with a kick against his metal palm that had you wincing. “Hello baby, I love feeling you kick so much but be gentle to Mama she’s doing such a good job with keeping you safe”, he leaned down to kiss your belly as your fingers delved into his hair.
“It’s ready!”, Steve shouted from another room, catching both of your attention. Bucky jumped up first and then helped you to stand, keeping his hand on your lower back as you wobbled to the spare room that Steve and Bucky had been decorating as the nursery. It was something you had left them in charge of organising, not having the energy over the last nine months to even think about decorating and Steve and Bucky were more than excited to take on the job and so far had kept it secret from your prying eyes.
As you looked around the room, tears swelled in your eyes instantly, reaching to hold onto Steve and Bucky, praising, “It’s perfect!”. There was a beautiful baby cot, pictures of the three of you surrounding the ultrasound scan photograph on the wall, a painting you knew Steve had done, and a rocking chair in the corner that Bucky had claimed as his for the night feeds he’d volunteered himself for.
Now it was all just a waiting game.
“You’re doing it again”, Bucky commented from where he stood in the entryway to your home having returned from the office a few days later.
“No, I’m not, I’m just cleaning-”.
“Nesting… You’re nesting, Doll”, Bucky reminded you, taking away the cloth from your hands and throwing it to the side so he could hold your shoulders and kiss your temple. “Go and rest, you’ve only got a few days left!”
You roll your eyes as you leaned into his warmth, your bump touching him first as you hugged around his chest, “Bucky most babies aren’t born on their due dates you know, I just want to make sure everything is perfect around the house and ready”.
“Everything IS perfect, please just rest”. You relented to him, feeling tired already from the ten minutes of standing, moving to sit on the couch when a period cramp suddenly began in your lower abdomen, causing you to scrunch your face up in pain, especially as it was followed by a large kick to the ribs.
“Woah, are you ok?” Bucky asked, his hand cupping your cheek.
“Yeah, probably Braxton hicks or something, it’s fine”, you say, finally sitting down and putting your feet on the small table. Bucky didn’t seem convinced and continued to be a mother hen throughout the rest of the night, even though the pains subsided after you had a nice warm bath.
As your due date came and went, you were becoming restless, needing the baby out, feeling overwhelmed with how big you felt, wanting to meet the baby and hating waiting around. It wasn’t like you hadn’t tried everything either. Eating spicy foods, and going for walks, especially up and down the stairs which was incredibly uncomfortable with how low the little bean’s head was sitting in your pelvis. You’d even had sex a few times, Bucky was more than happy to hear that nipple stimulation could induce labour but still, nothing happened.
Those period cramps would come and go throughout these days as well, getting your hopes up before they disappeared and still, no signs that your labour was even happening. 
On the fourth day following your due date, you awoke suddenly in the middle of the night to another period cramp that started in your lower back and spread around to your front. Even though this felt different,  you didn’t want to wake the boys and get theirs or your hopes up as you tried to slide out of bed without waking them to use the bathroom for what felt like the tenth time that night.
“You ok, baby?” Steve asked, his eyes still closed but his hand reached for you in the darkness.
“Yeah I’m, ok, go back to sleep Steve”, you encouraged, touching the back of his hand before pushing yourself up and waddling to the toilet, using it and then realising just how wide awake you were and the dull ache of the pains still lingered so you decided to run a warm bath. During the time that it was filling up, you had another pain which took longer to subside but this was always how it started with the intensity increasing but after the bath, it usually stopped. 
However, even as you let the warm water settle over your body, easing your muscles but the pains continued but at least the little bean was lovely and happy as he or she gave you a powerful kick to your ribs. The next pain had you gritting your teeth, eyes clenching closed as you held onto the side of the tub, waiting for it to pass but this pain lasted for nearly a full minute, and you decided maybe it was time to take some pain relief.
Standing and awkwardly climbing out of the bath, you dried your body and picked up your night dress to pull over your head when another pain came and took your breath away, your stomach hardening and causing you to moan lowly, bending over to blow the pain away.
“Honey?” Steve shouted from the bathroom having heard your moan as he waited for you to come back to bed. You couldn’t answer him as the pain consumed you, and he was rushing to be by your side, Bucky following closely behind him. Steve rubbed your back slowly as your pain finally began to ease so that you could look up at them both.
“Wow, that one was strong”.
“You ok? Can we get you anything?” Bucky asked, stepping forward with worry etched on his face.
“I’m ok.... I think… I don’t want to get my hopes up that this isn’t contractions but fuck, it hurt like hell”, you muttered, bending over to pick up your dress from the floor and then a trickle of clear liquid dripped down the inside of your leg. All three of you noticed as you tentatively looked up, “Is it bad that I can’t tell if I’ve just wet myself or if that’s my waters…”.
Neither of your worried boyfriends had time to answer as another painful wave came and had you doubling over, leaning your head against the sink. Steve was quick to grab you and let you lean against his strong body, remembering what he had learned from the antenatal appointments to help you through the pains, “That’s it baby, breath in and out, nice and slow”. It helped to listen and ground yourself through the pain as Bucky’s cold metal hand rubbed against your lower back, helping to ease the intense pressure from the baby.
The pain lasted for the same amount of time as the previous one and the clear liquid, which was definitely not urine, had gushed out more, forming a small puddle onto the floor. “Ok, I think it’s time we call someone”, you decided.
Bucky kissed the back of your head as he ran to get the phone and Steve helped you to pull your shirt on, his thumb brushing your chin as he sensed your anxieties, “You’re going to do amazing my love, we’ll be with you every step of the way”.
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thepixelelf · 5 months
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female ceo reader x tailor mingyu 1.1k words.
note: female reader (because the plot is based on how some men think women can't be taken seriously in higher up positions). this premise/idea is from The Duchess Deal by Tessa Dare. like pretty much all my fics, this is not a full story and more just a fun idea
[coincidence? I think yes] Letting out a guttural, defeated groan, you slump your head down on your keyboard. The keys press down, adding to the already incomprehensible email you were drafting to send to your personal assistant.
Seungkwan,
I need a husband.b,mfnhh7gy6untjjn 7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7nn7n7n
The first four words were stupid enough. Why should you need a husband? Just because your grandpa is a misogynistic prick?
7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7nn7n7n7n7n
And why should you need to get married of all things just so that he doesn't hand over "his" company -- that you practically resurrected from bankruptcy, by the way -- to your insipid cousin?
7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n77n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7
It's not like your cousin Yeongmin is married. He just happens to be the family's oldest male in your generation.
n7n7n7n7n7nn7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7n7
"Um--"
Seungkwan's voice makes you pop up, and you straighten your back to attempt to look put together even though it's arguable that Seungkwan is the only person who's ever seen you at your most bedraggled. He's probably the only person you'll ever let see you as anything beneath totally put together badass CEO who built themself up from almost nothing.
You smooth out your sleeves. "Yes?"
"There's a man at my desk," Seungkwan says, slightly confused. You're not sure why.
"Okay...?"
"Asking for you."
"Yes, Seungkwan." You nod, brows furrowing. "That's why people normally go to your desk."
His fingers toy with the end of his other arm's sleeve. "Yeah, but..."
"But?"
"He's wearing a wedding dress."
"Oh." You glance down at your computer screen, and the last words you typed-- well, on purpose.
I need a husband.
Weird.
"Do you, uh..." Seungkwan jerks his thumb towards the door he's only stepped halfway through. "...want me to send him away?"
"No, no." If a guy is coming to you in a wedding dress, he must want something. Badly. You've never heard of such a stunt, but you might as well hear him out. "Let him in."
Husband...man in a wedding dress... There's not that big of a difference, right?
Maybe you can offer him what he wants so badly. In exchange for something you want.
Seungkwan nods, still hesitant. "Alright, but you might want to put on some sunglasses."
You don't have time to ask him what the heck he means by that before he disappears out the door, and only seconds later, a blazing white fire barges in.
With all the floor-to-ceiling windows in your corner office, the afternoon sunlight is often a blessing. Right now, however, it bounces off approximately one million sequins, pearls, and crystals, and reflects so harshly into your poor eyeballs that you have to simultaneously raise your hand to cover your eyes and turn away.
"Oh my god." You may have just received snow blindness comparable to years of albedo exposure. "What the--"
"Miss CEO. Ma'am," Mr Say Yes to the Dress starts from behind the curtain of your fingers, voice loud, if a bit unsteady. "My name is Kim Mingyu, and I'm here to collect."
Lowering your hand just slightly, you allow yourself to see him from the shoulders up, which is lucky, since the dress seems to have a sleeveless sweetheart neckline.
Not bad. Broad, sculpted shoulders, a symmetrical face topped with fluffy black hair, something meek in his eyes -- despite having the gall to walk right into your office wearing the world's brightest hodgepodge of fabric and demand payment for... something.
"Collect?" you echo.
"Yes." He nods, and you see him shift to gesture towards the crinoline-filled skirt of the gown. "For the dress."
Instinctively, you look where he gestures, and you wince at the sparkles that stab your retinas. It's not that it's ugly. In fact, the handiwork must be incredible, if you know anything about anything. It's just so...much. Lace and pearls and sequins and rhinestones and floral embroidery.
"You must be mistaken. I never ordered--" You wave at the embodiment of Narnia's never ending winter. "--that."
"No, but Choi Yeori did."
Ah, now things are starting to make sense. You're closer to your cousin Yeori than you are her older brother Yeongmin, if only because you used to play murder mystery make-believe with her when you were nine and she was six. It's been a long time since those days, though. The only updates you get about Yeori's life now come from her public social media, and gossip columns. But there's one thing you know from both the past playtimes and the current Instagram stories.
Choi Yeori is a romantic. Always has been, always will be, you suspect.
From acting the femme fatale (as deadly as a six-year-old can be, which is surprisingly very) to the three engagement announcements she's since deleted from all her accounts, she likes to believe in stuff like love.
All the power to her, you say. Living in her beautiful world must be nice.
Well, except for when it's not so beautiful.
"Let me guess." You tilt your head at the boy-in-a-wonder. "The wedding's off."
Now that your hand is down, and your full attention is on him, Mingyu seems to shift uncomfortably under your gaze. His hands reach to pull the top of the dress higher over his pecs, since it's tailored to Yeori's exact size, not his.
He nods. "I spent countless hours on this dress--"
"I can see that." Otherwise he probably wouldn't be here.
"Everything is sewn by me, like she requested--"
"Of course." No machine could make something so ice queen from Sharkboy and Lavagirl-esque.
"And her payment was retroactively rescinded," he finished. "I can't get a hold of her, or any of her contacts, and I couldn't--"
"Find a single other person who would buy this amalgamation of sparkles, luxury, and fanfare?"
Frowning, Mingyu crosses his arms. "I couldn't think of who else to go to. I'm a one-man company. The cost of material on its own has almost put me in debt."
"Right, sorry." You roll your chair further under your desk and lean your elbows on the dark, lacquered surface. Your eyes glance once again over the dress. "But this could've been an email, you know."
He shrugs. "I got your attention, didn't I?"
You can't help but laugh. Yes, he's got you there.
Reaching into one of your drawers, you pull out your chequebook. "Right, well." You grab a pen and put it to paper. "What does my dear cousin owe you, Kim Mingyu?"
He rattles off the number, and you try not to sigh at it. Oh, Yeori... This time might really be too much.
You sign on the dotted line, and stand from your chair to round your desk. Walking up to him, you tear the single cheque from the book and hold it out.
"Here."
He's even more handsome up close, you note.
Just before his fingers can grip the expensive piece of paper, you jerk your hand back with a sharp bending of your elbow.
"Or," you say. "I could offer you even more than this."
Cautiously, Mingyu raises a brow. "Even more...?"
"You could take this money now--"
A moment happens where you curse in your head. You're acting cool and collected, but the idea bubbling in your mind is one of the most outlandish you've ever come up with. Are you really going to do this?
Mingyu eyes the cheque hungrily. That seals it. He needs money, and that's really the best thing you have to offer anyone, so why not someone with a pretty face?
You smile. "--or you could marry me."
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gracefall-mcyt · 2 months
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...SO. Hermitcraft Lifeline AU trailer I made for a class last semester.
Does contain spoilers but they're left vague-ish? Vague enough that I don't think it spoils the experience at all. Go read SlashMagpie's Lifeline AU. Please.
Now crossposted to Youtube!
Notes about stuff under the cut :)
Okay so. I know there are some inaccuracies to the actual fic, major and minor alike. However, this took me around 60 hours to make, and I wasn't able to work on anything else in between because of my deadline. I am not going back to fix things now. I spent the entire latter half of my winter break pretty much just working on this, because, like I said, I was doing it for an assignment.
It was a film studies class, and we had to create a pretend cult classic and then create some creative representation of it. I chose to do an adaptation of Lifeline AU for mine! That's why there are the black frames near the start–originally there was some pretty typical movie trailer text, I just didn't feel like including it here.
I'm going to be real, I would not have been able to get through that project if I wasn't doing it with LLAU. Lifeline AU was my lifeline, in a way. If I had stuck with my original plan, then I wouldn't have come up with such a GOOD final product. I probably would have quit the trailer and settled for a poster. With this, that never crossed my mind. I wound up with a product that I had genuine creative passion for, based on a story that I have immense love for.
@slashmagpie , thank you so much for writing this fic. I have said it before and I will say it again; this is my favourite thing I have ever read. Between its plot, characterization, worldbuilding... EVERYTHING. It's such a beautiful story. It's one of few works to actually make me think, to make me consider what's right and wrong, in a sense. Every time I reread it, even if it's just a small little section (or all of Asking for a Miracle. I'd say that that one has the biggest chokehold on me of the llau fics), I feel myself experiencing the fic all over again.
Going to be honest, I wasn't going into LLAU with any expectations. I found Lost Boys bc i was looking for fics with aliens, and so i decided Empty Oceans would be my "last fic before sleep." I ended up not sleeping that night, spending the next few hours reading through all of the series (aside from Twenty-Eight Days of Delirium, but I did go back to that one later that day), listening to the same song on loop the entire time. I was so engrossed by the story I didn't even notice until I was halfway through Asking for a Miracle.
I rambled on about the fic to anyone who would listen. My best friend, my cousin, my younger brothers, my older sibling, everyone. Eventually, when one day my cousin came over to have a sleepover, I was like. I know you're not going to read it. Would you like me to tell it to you? And she said yes. I expected it to take maybe a half hour. She expected it to take one hour. It ended up taking two and a half. By the end, she said "this sounds like it would make a great movie", so we ended up writing out the script for the very trailer you see above.
My cousin is actually the one who drew the beautiful clock seen at the beginning and on the monks' robes! She gave me permission to use it. I would tag her, but she doesn't have any public social media accounts.
At some point I'll come back and list all the small details, bc I put in quite a few, but for now I'm tired of typing up this post so you'll have to wait :)
Song used is Imaginary Worlds by Tyler K
I forgot where exactly I got the clock ticking sound effect but I will try to find it and link it eventually.
As stated before, this is entirely based on Lifeline AU by SlashMagpie. Go read it if you haven't already, I'm begging you.
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wordsarelife · 3 months
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—my tears ricochet
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pairing: anthony lockwood x gn!reader
summary: you save lockwoods life on a job but he can't save you.. but with a twist
warnings: injury, blood, falling from a building, and angsttt
note: dw it has a happy ending!! i promise
"the source should be upstairs, i can feel it" the adrenaline was rushing through your body and you knew there wasn't enought time to wait for an answer, so you quickly climbed the stairs.
lockwood was hot on your heels. "i'm coming with you"
lucy and george were busy fighting the type two and you didn't have time to argue against him. you ran through the rooms of the upper floor, searching through them, but never finding the source.
"it has to be in there" lockwood pointed to the last door left in the corridor and you nodded eagerly, dashing down the hallway. what you didn't notice, was the second type two emerging from the wall and following you.
lockwood was opening the drawers, while you were busy looking aroung the room as well. none of you noticed the ghost that was coming closer and closer to touching lockwood.
you gasped, upon discovering the source, your head turning to inform lockwood, when you noticed the ghost. there wasn't enough time to throw the silver net, and even if there had been, this was a total different ghost than lucy and george were fighting downstairs, so you couldn't know for sure that was the right source.
you quickly stepped between lockwoods turned body and the ghost. in the same moment you tossed the silver net, just for the small hope that it would actually help you. but before the net hit the source, the ghost had already outstretched it's hand. touching your cheek.
despite the touch being soft, all kinds of emotion hit you and made you stumble backwards. right behind you wasn't a wall or the hallway. it was the open window. with one last bit of your strength you tried to hold onto it, but you couldn't fight against it. not when you were already falling.
"y/n!" you could hear lockwood call, far far away. he was probably busy fighting the ghost now, in the case that the silver net really didn't do anything. at least you had given him a chance.
lockwood fought off the ghost as quickly as possible. his head always turning back to the window, trying to make out your form or how far the ground was away. he stepped aroung the silver net, fixing it's position on the source and the ghost disappeared. he was halfway hanging out the window just a second later, scanning the ground for you or any hit where you had disppeared to.
"lockwood!" the voice finally reached his ears
"y/n?" lockwood turned around, but he was met with lucy and george who looked at him worriedly
"we've been calling you for ages" george muttered
"where is y/n?" lucy tried to look behind the boy before her
"i don't know" lockwood breathed, walking down the hallway quickly. george and lucy close behind him.
"what do you mean?" george asked confused
"did anyone that was ghost touched ever disappear?" lockwood asked "is there a touch or ghost as strong to make you die and disappear on the spot?"
"y/n was ghost-touched?" lucy gasped
"that's what i'm trying to tell you" lockwood said loudly, rushing down the stairs "i think they were and then they fell out of the window and now they're gone"
"they fell out of the window?" george asked, but his question was left unanswered. lockwood was too busy, throwing open the front door and quickly walking around the house.
"they should be here" he looked up to make out the window "they should be right here" he repeated
lucy was holding her hands to her face, sinking to her knees in shock. george was trying to make sense of it all and lockwood was walking from wall to wall, muttering the same sentence over and over again.
"why aren't they here?" he screamed suddenly, holding onto georges collar and shaking him over and over again, until lucy intefered.
"this won't lead us anywhere" she said softly, losening lockwoods hold on george. "george wasn't there when it happened, but you were"
"are you saying it was my fault?" lockwood asked, tears still flowing over his cheeks. his friends could see the trauma that was bubbling up again. old memories entering his brain and spinning the events, so that he would eventually come to the conclusion that he had been at fault.
"no" lucy said "of course not. but maybe you saw something, something that you didn't really notice"
"yeah" george added "just close your eyes and try to remember"
"i-i can't" lockwood could feel the panic bubble up in his chest
"okay, it's alright" lucy tried to calm him down "maybe they are at home"
"i don't know" lockwood looked around once more "what if they are here somewhere? hurt, and we didn't even try to look for them?"
"they aren't here" lucy assured "let's go home and call the hospital, there is no use in panicking right now"
"o-okay" lockwood nodded
lucy had sent george and lockwood into the kitchen, so she could call the hospital, without lockwood hearing the conversation. she wasn't surprised when there was no one there that fit your description
before she could tell either george or lockwood, there doorbell rang. lucy wasn't fast enough to open the door, when lockwood came rushing down the hallway and dragged it open.
"y/n!" he said relieved.
lucy peeked around his shoulder. and indeed, in front of the door were you, accompanied by flo, who was holding you.
"i suggested the hospital, but they wanted to see you first" lockwood was holding you before flo could even finish saying that.
"what happened?" george was standing next to lucy and watching the scene play out in confusion "how did they disappear?"
"they didn't" flo helped lockwood to get you inside and on the couch "they came to me as fast as possible, i don't just carry these around with me for fun" she was holding up an adrenaline shot.
"i knew i needed something fast" you said "flo was the quickest option, i don't think i would've survived without her immediate help"
"no problem" flo shrugged and lockwood sighed
"we thought we had lost you" he muttered "i thought i had lost you"
"never" you smiled "but i couldn't risk that ghost touching you"
"that was so stupid" george shook his head
"and incredibly brave" lucy added proudly
"you're still bleeding from the head" flo reminded, plastering your wound with one of the tissues from the side table.
lockwood was broken out of his trance by that. "yeah, flo's right" he walked back into the hallway, putting on his coat, before he returned "let's get you to the hospital"
everyone helped to get you out of the house and into the nearest cab.
"don't you ever try to save me again" lockwood said later, while he was sitting next to your bed, after the doctor had seen you and you had received medication and bandaging for your head wound.
"oh, lockwood" you sighed "of course i'm always going to save you"
"this one was so close" lockwood nestled his head in your lap "i thought the ghost had touched you and send you into oblivion"
you smiled sadly
"i didn't even hear you hit the ground" lockwood went on "i tried to look for you, but the ghost was still there and by the time i got to the window you were gone"
"i didn't hit the ground" you smiled at the glimpse of relief in his eyes "i fell onto this very old sofa that was standing there perfectly, like it had been waiting to catch me"
"so it didn't hurt as much?" he asked
"not as much as it could've" you shrugged "otherwise my head wouldn't be in one piece anymore"
"oh god" lockwood muttered lowly "that would be awful"
"it would" you grinned
"but i knew if someone could survive this it would be you"
you smiled at his compliment "luckily, because you would be flying through oblivion right now, if i hadn't saved your fine little ass" you giggled at lockwoods dramatically offended expression
"well, thank you for saving my, what did you say? 'fine little ass'?" he laughed "i don't think i got to thank you until now"
"don't worry, you don't have to thank me" you combed through his hair "i'd do it over and over again"
"i would do the same for you"
"i know, darling" you kissed his forehead and watched happily how his eyes fluttered close "i know"
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maybank-archives · 1 year
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impulse - jj maybank
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⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
warning: sexual content. drug use. +18. minors DNI. unprotected sex. laguage. public sex. oral sex,female receiving. public sex.
word count: 1.3 k
author's notes: this was so fun to write! it took me a couple days but its finally here! hope y'all enjoy.
masterlist
⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
it’s safe to say that having jj as your coworker wasn’t a brilliant idea, specially working around kooks, serving food and with all the flirting and conversations both of you didn’t get a lot of work done around unless there was someone being a pain in your asses. Today is one of those days, three arguments with your boss and by the end of the third one you felt your face turn red with anger.
JJ was your best friend since day one so he pretty much knew your next move as you exchanged looks with him smirking, you tossed your apron into the floor as you stormed out of the room giving your former boss the finger and a proud smile.
as the sun starts to set you walk to the beach, you go to your spot which it’s far from figure eight and far from people. The sound of the waves and the beautiful view of the sun pays off all your exhaustion, your clothes are now in the sand as you run to the oceans in your white bathing suit, the cold water hits your feet causing goosebumps, you swim further feeling your body melt away the tension from earlier.
While you’re floating in between the waves, you spotted a motorcycle approaching JJ, he gets out of the bike and starts walking in your direction, you get out of the water and meet him halfway.
“classic y/n, quits with class and now acts like nothing happens AND still manage to look hotter than ever”.- jj says smiling and clapping
“i swear to god, if i had to listen to that asshole complain for one more hour and i would kill myself”.- you said, rolling your eyes.
“here” jj says, throwing a towel, you half dried yourself and put the towel on the floor to sit on it “please tell me that you have weed on you.” you ask him pouting your lips 
JJ scoffed sitting next to you, he patted his pockets carefully getting a lighter and a pre rolled cigarette. “I'm offended that you even questioned.” 
you hugged your legs waiting patiently, jj lips turned into a smirk watching your mannerism.
“you look like a kid waiting for candy.” he says lighting up the joint “that’s my type of candy” you responded shrugging your shoulders “there ya go cupcake.” he hand you the joint, you pinch the cigarette to your lips inhaling the smoke and releasing a few seconds later, you pass it to JJ who copies your actions.
“What would I do if you weren’t my best friend. Maybank?.” you asked laid down
“probably would be in love with me or trying to get laid by me”. he answered chuckling, you grin at his comment.
A few moments later, a comfortable silence grew between you two, jj was sitting staring at the waves and still hitting his joint, you narrowed your eyes to him as your mind came up with intrusive thoughts.
“you know you’re pretty hot right?” 
“jesus, how high are you?” jj responded lazily
“would mind if i kissed you right now?” you blurred out
“nah, but i don’t think you mean it-” jj was interrupted as you sat in his lap, legs wrapped to his side.
“hi” you whisper
“hi y/n” he replies hesitantly, staring at you, he bites his lips as you tighten your grip around him.
“y/n, what are you doing?.” 
“letting the weed give me courage.” you whispered as you leave wet kisses on his neck, JJ groans placing his hand to your waist as a response “I think it’s time for us to quit flirting.” you said in between kisses.
“jesus” he breathes out  “fuck it.” he curses, laying you to the floor, his lips met yours eagerly, tongue slipping into your mouth grewing the urge between you two. JJ grinds his now, hard dick into you, your fingers reach his shirt pulling over his head, he attacks your neck sucking your skin sending chills through your spine.
“You don't know how long I've been waiting for this.” JJ rasped to your ears
“JJ….” you pleaded, he kept marking your neck, you close your eyes yearning for his touch, you reached the back of your bikini and unties, JJ pulled back, eyes falling to your boobs.
He stare at your state of vulnerability, topless with legs spread open, you filled with lust, your fingers trails your figure ending at your wetness, you pushed the fabric of your bikini to the side and slide your fingers to your folds, you lock eyes with him who has a sinful look in his face.
“princess you're gonna make me cum so fast if you keep doing this...look how perfect and soaked you are.”
“i'm showing you how much of a good girl I am.” your doe eyes stared up at him, softening as you rub your fingers to your clit.
the desire overtake your mind, you brought your fingers to your lips and sucked the liquid out of them, jj was painfully hard watching you taste yourself.
“then show me how well you can ride my dick”.- JJ growls
you climbed on top of him, he quickly removes his shorts and underwear, you stroke his length up and down before adjusting his cock to your entrance, a filthy noise escapes your lips as you feel him throbbing inside of you, JJ move his hands cupping your breast, you fasten your pace , JJ throws his head back of pleasure.
“You feel so good baby, goddammit.”
his thumb teases your clit rubbing circles as you bounce on him  “gosh jj, yes, don't stop.” you cry loudly forgetting that you're in public.
“you like having my dick inside you, don't you? look how amazing you take my cock.” JJ moves his waist helping you ride him, JJ switches positions bending you over this time.
“shit, your pussy feels so good as it looks.” he rasped, flicking his tongue at your cunt.
you shiver as jj goes down on you from behind, you arch your back giving him plenty of space to taste you, his tongue moves through your hole and clit, he wraps his lips around your clit relentlessly.
“jj, please.”
“you taste fucking delicious princess, let me feel your tight pussy again.” 
he lines his cock to your entrance teasing with the tip on your opening, before pushing into you.
“jj, fuck me, please.” you begged again
“So needy, patient baby.” jj says as he speeds up his movements. his hands made way to your clit rubbing vicious circles into it as he let his cock please you.
“right there J, yes”.- you sob, your moans were making him slam his cock inside you harder and faster.
“fuuuuck y/n.” jj cursed, your walls fluttering around his cock, eyes couldn't stay open, the euphoric feeling of being close plus the hint of weed on your system made your entire body shake. JJ cups and squeeze your boobs firmly, bucking his hips deeper.
the sound of your butt slamming on his skin was echoing loudly through the beach.
“shit, you take my cock so well princess.” his hands grips your hips so hard marking your skin.
 “J, I'm c-cumming.” you whined desperately clenching around him. “oh god, yes.” you gasped repeatedly, the familiar frenetic feeling takes all over your twitching body drenching the towel below you.
“yeah, such a good girl.” jj moans his final curse, his thrusts become slower and sloppier, he grunted pulling out painting your ass with his cum.
both of you stumble down and collapse to the floor breathless, you look around making sure one more time that you were both alone, at this point both of you were loud enough to not make any person approach the area.
“goddamn.” JJ rasped as both of you come down off your highs “what was that?” he turned to you 
you chuckle, panting “ I don't know, i just think this type of weed gave me way too much energy.” you spoke
“Then I'll save more for later.” he grabs your face, pulling you into a kiss.
⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
© maybank-archives 2023 — no one has permission to copy or translate any of my works, if you see any of my work being reproduced in another platform please contact me! :)
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swiftsdelucaa · 1 year
Note
Could I please have an imagine where the reader moves to Seattle. She starts out as a pediatrician at grey loan. Around this time she realizes she's pregnant. With Carina DeLuca as her ob-gyn and coworker the two fall for each other. Carina did not expect to fall for a pregnant woman but realized she knows what she wants. So she asks you out and you say yes around the time you are halfway through the pregnancy. by the end of the pregnancy, it becomes clear you much you and your baby mean to her. When you go into labor she freaks out and comments that “My girlfriend is having our baby!” (you hear her say that but say nothing due to the pain). When the baby is born she is in awe of the tiny human but kinda keeps to the side for a few minutes until you say “come meet OUR son.” Carina tries to apologize for calling him hers but the reader says that Carina is his mother too. Just like a cute family thing please?
❛ 𝑶𝒖𝒓 𝒇𝒂𝒎𝒊𝒍𝒚 ❜
𝙋𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜: Carina DeLuca x f!reader ♡
𝘼/𝙣: I was in the right mood for this lol, enjoy!
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You've always loved kids, you would do anything to make them happy. Telling a parent the good news about their child was what you made a living for and although you were aware of the difficult times, you knew how to handle them.
But then just during your successful time in this place you found out you were pregnant. It shocked you enough, because you didn't plan it. You didn't even have a father by your side. It was one of those silly one night stands. You had always been skeptical about this type of thing, but others really instigated you to find distractions outside work and you thought that for once nothing bad would happen if you had some fun. But here's the world turning upside down on you.
As mentioned you could handle any situation, thinking about your life with a baby got you so excited. Yes, you would have loved it, even if as a single mother it would have been a little more taxing. So now you find yourself working for lovely kids while also being careful to take care of the baby you were carrying.
You took it upon yourself to find an appointment with a gynecologist, you certainly wanted your baby to grow up healthy. You were so flustered the first time.
"Good morning" you were greeted by a pretty girl who smiled at you as you sat on the couch.
"Hi" you greeted her with a polite smile, looking around the room a bit.
"You nervous?" the woman asked.
"You don't know how much" you replied with a chuckle at the end.
"It's okay, it's normal" she said making you lie down.
"So, first time?" she asked.
"Yeah"
"I'm doctor DeLuca, Carina DeLuca" she held out her hand to shake it, which you did.
"DeLuca... it's familiar..." you said reflecting.
"Probably you know my brother, Andrew" you nodded to her statement, you had already worked with him a few times.
"Yeah, well I'm Y/n L/n" a smile appeared on her face as soon as she heard your name.
"The famous Y/n, that one who does miracles for kids, finally I meet you" for some strange reason the way she told you that almost made you blush.
"Ok, let's start" she lifted your shirt slightly and took the tools. You moaned as your skin touched the cold gel she smeared on you, and she began to shift her gaze to the monitor. All your emotions and thoughts were stopped by the sound of your baby's heartbeat, which made you cry.
"See, it's here" Carina pointed to the baby's position on the monitor as you looked at it with the tears in your eyes.
"It's a healthy eight week fetus!" the smile on your face increased, unable to hold the tears.
"Hey" Carina wiped the gel off your belly and pulled your shirt back down.
"I, sorry, I don't-"
"No no, it means you care, it's good" she stroked your hand while you wiped away your tears.
"Yeah, thank you, now I should..." you got up from the couch recovering and motioning to have to go.
"I'll make other appointments for you, we'll make sure everything goes well" she took out a notebook to take notes. You stopped at the doorway, smiling one last time at the girl.
"I can't wait" then you went out. After the door closed she mumbled another sentence. "Mee too"
Luckily the meetings went better and better, your baby was growing up perfectly. And the company was pleasant too. Carina stood by you whenever she needed it, she helped you tell others and was there through the ups and downs, she was the moral support you needed.
During the middle of the pregnancy you already couldn't take it anymore. It got tiring and excruciating, and after you found out the baby's sex you wanted to know him even more. You were so happy, you would have prepared to welcome a baby boy. And on the same day Carina asked you out. To be honest she caught you a bit off guard, you were so pregnant and she was your gynecologist…
She apologized immediately after she asked, sounding quite embarrassed, but you made her even more surprised when you said yes. You had thought about her, indeed this woman seemed to show so much interest on you and your baby, and that was all it mattered to you.
You didn't regret saying yes, you had a wonderful evening, and she now took better care of you than before. Even being able to get to know her brother better and watch their quarrels in Italian amused you a lot.
When you went into labor you were completely unprepared, you were washing up for surgery with Alex, which was probably inappropriate being at your ninth month pregnant, and then your water broke. It was lucky that there was someone else with you, because you had completely panicked. He immediately had you loaded onto a stretcher, calling Carina and Arizona, only the best for you.
The contractions increased more and more, becoming almost unbearable, Carina was next to you shaking your hand.
"You... you know that you can resort to orgasm if..."
"Carina, I'd rather have sex with you under more normal circumstances!" you cut her off knowing where she was getting at, starting screaming in pain in the end.
"My girlfriend is having our baby!" she exclaimed with happiness as you continued to scream.
Well yes, it was tiring, but you managed to get to the end, being able to hold your beautiful baby in your arms. He was so beautiful, you were very very happy at that moment. You sought Carina with the gaze, finding her not far from the door walking around it.
"Hey" you got her attention. “Come meet our son” you said with a smile as she entered.
"I- I'm sorry... I was just-"
"It's okay, he's yours too, he's ours" before she could feel guilty you consoled her. You cared about her, you wanted her in your baby's life, you knew she would be happy.
She bent down to give you a kiss on your lips and stroked your hair. The baby's little noises made you stop attracting your attention.
"Oh, your mommies love you too" Carina gave him a kiss on his forehead, the sight of them made you laugh. It was so cute, maybe too much to be real. Together you would have been the best.
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lightfeltmemories · 4 months
Note
Hi nice blog 🖤
ask: how do you see kurama react if he realized he had feelings for someone? would he be in denial? would he react right away or let it rest for a bit? would he be shocked or not surprised at all? would he fall for someone who is just his type or someone completely different than his past partners? your choice ofc
thank you for considering my ask 🖤
hello there! this is my very first time writing for anyone relating to yuyu hakusho and i'm not even halfway finished with the series yet so please understand that the characterization will not be 100% correct so .. :P thank you for requesting!
KURAMA: REACTION TO HAVING A CRUSH.
notes: reader is gender neutral, kurama can be either his usual series self or aged up, besides a few hints it really doesn't matter honestly just know this is purely sfw, kurama may be ooc but if you leave hate comments or anything passive aggressive the comment will be deleted.
tw: none honestly.
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when he realizes he has a crush, he kind of just.. realizes, he's not like hiei who would denounce any and all feelings or kuwabara who would put his pride to the side to go on to ask them out, he kind of just finds out that he has a bit of interest in them, giving it time and thought and comes to the conclusion that "yep, i have a crush on them."
has kurama had a crush before? does kurama have past lovers? well, no to both questions, he never really gave the idea much thought and hasn't found any humans that interest him in that regard, sure, some people are attractive, but when this specific person came.. it kind of awakens something in him.
and as for type, he doesn't exactly have one, he's not the "all humans look the same" because he knows full well they don't, but, he most likely prefers someone who is a bit on the feminine side.
kurama has never really been one for love at first sight, getting to know someone more then seeing if they're for them or not is much better... he kind of doesn't understand why humans would want to jump straight into relationships without at least getting to know each other first.
it'll take some time for him to actually take any action, he kind of wants to get closer with them the natural human way, he's not exactly new to human interaction, and hasn't had many experiences where he's been called a creep or anything, so, befriending them would be a great start, therefore he'll get to know them better.
once he befriends his s/o and finds out why he likes them so much, he gets a bit impatient, he doesn't want to take things to the next level right now, but he'll still pull through and wait until the time is ready.
eventually months pass, and kurama is ready to confess, this can go two ways.
if they accept; kurama is very happy, asking them for a kiss before they pull them into an embrace, he finally got what he wanted and life is good.
if they reject; kurama is very understanding, though disappointed, he'll still want to remain friends, especially since he had shared some pretty good memories with them.
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seokmthw · 1 year
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take a break | kim gyuvin
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⇢ pairing: gyuvin x reader
⇢ warnings: fluff
⇢ word count: 676
⇢ note: sorry for being a little ia as of late, i promise i'm trying my best to get some stuff written! i started my full time job last week and have been super tired, so please bear with me!
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you huffed in annoyance, tugging at the roots of your own hair at the dreaded powerpoint that was displayed in front of you on your all too bright laptop screen, your mind reeling with all the possible things that could go wrong while you were presenting it in class the next day.
you’d been working tirelessly at it for hours, the only thing keeping you going being a coffee and chinese takeout your boyfriend had brought you for dinner hours earlier.
said boyfriend wouldn’t stop trying to get you to call it quits for the night, either.
“y/n~” gyuvin whined, his voice slightly muffled from the comforter he was currently burying his face in, “come on, love, you’ve been working yourself to death. at least take a ten minute break.”
“i can’t, i need to make sure everything is included in this so i can minimize the chances of me screwing everything up tomorrow,” you passively dismissed, waving your hand lazily at him while you were reaching for your coffee, which by now was watered down, but you didn’t care.
after a few more minutes of typing and reviewing your notecards, gyuvin was talking again, “if you don’t stop for the night, i’m gonna start crying. is that something you really want?”
you couldn’t help but chuckle, “whatever you say, gyu.”
“babe,” gyuvin defeatedly sighed, “i know this is something yourself stressed out over, but i seriously think you’ll do just fine. besides, if you keep cramming stuff in for hours on end, it doesn’t really help you retain much anyway.”
you stopped reading your notecard halfway through, absorbing every word he just spoke and realized that maybe, just maybe, he was right. and as if on cue, he was speaking again.
“also, i really, really wanna cuddle with you right now. i’ve been waiting for hours and i feel like i’m gonna die.”
you chuckled, swiveling in your chair to face the boy who sprawled out on your bed. his hair was in messy tufts in top of his head, his t-shirt was bunched up enough to reveal a small sliver of his tummy and his sweatpants were sloppily tied up. the comforter was barely covering him as well, just enough to give him the warmth and safety he needed.
you had to admit, his arms looked beyond welcoming.
you sighed, taking one last look at your powerpoint before finally closing your laptop and putting your notes away in your bag, finally admitting, “i guess you’re right.”
“oh sweetheart, come here,” you rose from your chair and crawled into bed, where gyuvin was laying with his arms wide open, and melted into his embrace like your life depended on it.
you could feel a soft laugh rumble in his chest, his voice quiet as he spoke now, “i can tell you’re tired.”
“i really am,” you agreed sleepily, your eyes growing heavy after only moments of being wrapped up with him, “thank you, gyu. i mean it. i don’t know what i would do without you.”
he pressed a gentle kiss against your forehead, pulling the comforter over your bodies and somehow managing to bring you even closer to him. within mere minutes, he could hear your breath even out and small sounds erupting from your lungs to let him know that you were sound asleep.
the boy smiled to himself, somehow managing to shut the lamp off behind him without waking you. while it was almost a chore for him to get you to take even a five minute break, he wouldn’t trade it for the world. there was always something about the way you would laugh at his corny jokes and whining that always made him want to keep pestering you.
he brushed the loose strands of hair from your face and kissed your forehead once more, mumbling, “i love you, stubborn ass. you’re gonna knock that presentation out of the park tomorrow.”
slowly but surely, he fell asleep too, content by the mere fact that he had you by his side.
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laracrofted · 1 year
Text
baby, i'm high octane (i)
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synopsis: nora rogers has made a name for herself in the documentary world, but lately, she's been running on empty. and then, with impeccable timing, her aunt charlie calls about an eight-week project in san diego: a feature on naval aviation's newest and most elite squadron. she accepts.
pairings: jake seresin x nora rogers (oc), minor bradley bradshaw x nora rogers (oc)
warnings: 18+, minors dni, explicit language, existential dread, alcohol consumption, slutty (affectionate) rooster, eventual smut in later chapters. set after the movie, so spoilers!
note: i have been working on this for many, many months, and every time i went back to edit it, it gained another 500 words, so i need to put it out in the world for my own sake. hope you enjoy!
read on AO3 | series post | next chapter
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tagging: @theharddeck as usual, some mutuals (@anniesocsandgeneralstore @roleycoleyland), plus some folks who were nice about the halloween fic (@peakyrogers @t-nd-rfoot @double-j) let me know if you'd like to be added or removed!
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[ OPENING CRAWL ]
On March 3, 1969, the UNITED STATES NAVY established an elite school for the top one percent of its pilots. Its purpose was to teach the LOST ART OF AERIAL COMBAT and to ensure that the handful of men (and now women) who graduated were the BEST FIGHTER PILOTS IN THE WORLD. They succeeded.
The Navy calls it Fighter Weapons School. You might know it better as TOP GUN.
The DAGGER SQUADRON is Naval Aviation’s newest and most elite squadron, exclusively made up of patch wearers. Here are their stories…
 [ CUE MUSIC AND FADE TO BLACK ] 
Back in California for less than 24 hours, and Nora already longs for the cobblestone streets and late night espressos and dear god, the accents of the past six months.
She is used to being on the move. Living out of an expertly packed suitcase, down to a science now. Never quite settling down.
Any documentary filmmaker worth their salt learns early to stay light on their feet, ready at a moment’s notice to get the call that takes them halfway around the globe and brings them the quote, unquote next great story. 
This…was a different sort of call.
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“You want me to go to San Diego? Why?” 
It was well past midnight in France, which made it more or less dinner time on the other side of the Atlantic. For Charlie Blackwood, a perfectly acceptable time to ring her favorite niece, but Nora had to take the call out on the small balcony that was attached to her hotel room. 
Documentaries weren’t the same as Hollywood films with their wider box office appeal and George Clooney-type stars. Funding was measly in comparison, so Nora bunked with one of the producers for the Paris leg. She and Jenna had worked together before a couple years back, and while Nora knew her to be sugar sweet from dawn to dusk, the 30-year-old woman did not fuck around with her skincare routine and her eight hours. 
At this time of night on a non-weekend, Paris didn’t have much street noise, but Nora was still certain Charlie’s connection must’ve cut out somewhere in the middle of her sentence. Or maybe Nora had heard her wrong. 
International calls could be so fickle sometimes. Right?
“Let me get this straight. You’re asking if I want to leave Paris to go to San Diego…” Nora repeated slowly, leaving ample breathing room between each word, plenty of time for Charlie to cut in and correct her, “and meet with your ex-boyfriend about some Naval feature? We don’t even like him.” 
“You can call him Maverick,” Charlie replied evenly, “Everybody else does.” 
Nora pulled a face. “I’ll call him Pete. How’s that?” 
“He’ll definitely ask you to call him Maverick.” 
“And I’ll still call him Pete.” 
Charlie’s answering sigh was loud in her ear, even through the static, and Nora smiled down at her shoes. She took a careful step around the bite-sized table, stacked precariously full with her laptop, camera, and notepad, and planted her elbows on the railing. Metal creaked gently under her weight.
“Pete… will be fine,” Charlie relented, “and really, Pete is fine in my book. We’re just… two old acquaintances who wanted different things and were never going to work out in the long term. Besides, from what I hear, Penny Benjamin is his new sweetheart now. Well, new old sweetheart.”
She didn’t know who Penny Benjamin was. Must be a real saint to put up with him.
“Good. He won’t be knocking on your door the next time the Navy sends him to Washington to accept some medal then, right?” 
Nora was seventeen the last time Pete Mitchell came knocking on Charlie Blackwood’s door; around eighteen months after Nora’s mom died, making Charlie her legal guardian. He happened to be in town for some medal or some ceremony or some medal at some ceremony.
He left in the dead of night, out the window, and Charlie spent the next two weeks muttering curses about hotshot pilots and their charismatic bullshit.
“That was almost twelve years ago, Nora,” Charlie chided, much less fun Aunt Charlie and much more diplomatic Charlotte Blackwood, employed by the Pentagon in that moment. Nora rolled her eyes. 
“And anyway,” Charlie continued, not letting her get another word in, “Maverick isn’t the main contact. You’d only meet with him because All Hands…” A Naval magazine, print and digital, funding the project, as Charlie had explained in her initial one long sentence explanation before Nora had been distracted by the who and the where. “…wants to focus on his team. Everything is already approved. All you, my love, would need to do is get the golden seal from Cyclone to head it up. He’s the Air Boss over there.” 
“Now Cyclone is a name that I don’t know,” Nora said, then swiped out of the call to look up the definition of Air Boss. “Doesn’t sound like a name made up by a 13-year-old boy who plays too much Call of Duty. He a Captain too?”
“Vice Admiral. You can meet him on your first day,” and Nora’s lips parted in protest, to say that was a little presumptuous, given she hadn’t agreed to anything and was still half a world away working on something else. Charlie cut her off, right at the knees: “Don’t start with me. Your Paris job wraps in what… four, five days?
Three, but Nora didn’t correct her. 
“Normally, by now, I would be getting half a dozen calls every week from you, gushing about what you’ve got going on next; whatever place you’ll be jetting off to this time. This is the first time I’ve talked to you in at least two weeks,” Guilt pinged at her chest, along with a large helping of existential dread. “Have you even signed on to anything new?”
No. And Nora was doing jack shit to change that. 
Her producer was already signed on for a film that would start pre-production ten weeks from now. It was a big one, lots of people to bring on board, and Jenna – literal angel in human form Jenna offered to pass Nora’s name along for consideration. 
Nora still hadn’t given an answer. 
She worried the edge of her lip but said nothing, and Charlie must’ve taken that as encouragement enough to continue on. “It’ll be a short project. Gives you enough time to find something new that excites you. Just… go to North Island and talk to Cyclone. You need a break.” 
Late May breezed across her cheeks, smelling of the sweet pink and white cherry blossoms in bloom at a nearby park. She’d passed it nearly every day, afraid that the end of May would come and Nora wouldn’t ever see them in full bloom before having to leave. They bloomed two weeks ago, almost overnight, and Nora knew that June loomed and with it, the end of another project. 
All that remained was uncertainty. 
She did need a break, though Nora wasn’t sure that anyone other than her aunt and herself would consider working on another documentary to be a break. She couldn’t remember the last time Charlie had even taken a sick day. They were born and bred workaholics the both of them, and usually, Nora thrived on that.
But lately, Nora was so tired. 
Another project could be good for me, Nora thought. Fewer eyes and expectations, without the pressure of acclaim and awards and future grants and questions of what are you doing next tightening like a noose around her neck. It’d be a one and done. She could do that.
“Alright,” Nora said, feeling a little lighter from letting the words loose. That was reassuring, at least. “Start from the beginning. How’d you find out about it? Who are the subjects? What’s the goal?” 
Smile audible in her voice, Charlie started again, “Here is what I know…” 
They wrapped mid-week with the usual fanfare, and the next day, Nora was packed and on a plane back home to Southern California. 
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Nora could already tell the Vice Admiral was ready to have the screening process over and done with. He barely asked her any questions before shaking her hand and foisting her onto Admiral Bates who ran her through the rules and regulations for getting onto the base and her accommodations. 
Since Nora was freelancing for a Naval magazine, the United States government would be putting her up for the duration of the project. God bless America. She did not want to find a last minute hotel room in San Diego in June. 
After obtaining a temporary ID card and a neat stack of manilla folders, probably filled with generously redacted background and service records, Nora is promptly deposited in the beachside parking lot of a steel-blue apartment building, faded from sun and brine, with a whole night ahead. 
Showering off the plane eats up a few minutes, as does replying to the check-in email that the magazine contact sent over this afternoon. They would talk more over the weekend and into next week. It was difficult to connect with the time difference, so Charlie had guided the initial communication. 
Calling Charlie drains another half hour, while Nora hums in all the right places and fights to keep her eyes open, chiming in with the occasional observation about North Island and tidbit about the conversation with Cyclone and Warlock. 
“What’d you think of Cyclone?”
She stares at the blank wall across from the bed – all that wide open space and not an art print in sight – and thinks back. 
Cyclone leveled an impassive stare at her over the folder that held her portfolio – apparently faxed over by Charlie before Nora had even agreed to come – and said, “This is an unusual circumstance. Most of the nepotism hires that come across my desk are aiming higher than an eight week contractor.” 
She’d bitten her cheek to hold back a laugh, and Admiral Bates let out a suspiciously timed cough, hiding his mouth behind a balled fist. 
“He was kind of hot,” Nora admits, then has to hold the phone away from her ear to not be deafened by Charlie’s laughter. “What? Just because I lack a father figure, I’m not allowed to appreciate an older man every now and then?” 
“Sure, but I think I’ll draw the line at Maverick.” 
Nora does her best projectile vomit noise, and Charlie laughs so hard that Mr. Charlotte Blackwood – as Nora affectionately likes to call Charlie’s husband John, who always accepted it with a congenial smile that only made her like him more – shouts from another room, wanting to know what exactly is so hilarious. 
She won’t see Pete Mitchell until Monday, and after promising to tell him that Charlie says hello and sends her best to him and this Penny Benjamin woman, Nora hangs up the phone. 
It’s barely 8 PM, and Nora wants nothing more than to crawl under the covers and leech the travel from her bones, but the San Diego sun is stubborn and high on the horizon. She knows her own body well enough to know that an 8 PM bedtime makes for a 3 AM bout of insomnia. 
Boredom finds Nora perched on a cushioned barstool, a fresh t-shirt on her torso and a new coat of red lipstick on her lips, in the crowded Hard Deck bar. Sipping on an Old Fashioned, chatting with none other than Penny Benjamin. 
“Charlie Blackwood,” Penny Benjamin repeats, a surprised but amiable smile on her face. A brown leather jacket sits over her slender shoulders, the same warm shade as her hair, and Nora spots a United States Navy patch on the sleeve. “God, I haven’t seen Charlie in… 30 years now. She may have told you, but I met her once or twice at Top Gun, back before my old man, the great Admiral Benjamin, retired. How’s she doing?” 
“She’s good,” Nora offers, adding as an afterthought, just in case Penny Benjamin was the jealous type. “Married now.” 
Penny sends her a sidelong look, narrow-eyed, that must make the fresh-faced Top Gun hopefuls cower in their regulation boots. Behind the glass, Nora’s lips curve into an amused smirk. 
Things must be going well. Good for them.
Nora swirls the amber liquid, fishing out an extra cherry from the bottom and popping it into her mouth. “She sends her well wishes. She’d probably want me to give you a hug or something, but I think I’d fall on my ass trying to lean over the counter. Consider yourself lucky.” 
“You can give my hug to Pete, but only if I’m there to witness.” 
 “Distinguished Captain Mitchell isn’t much of a hugger? I’m shocked.” 
“Are you kidding?” Penny fills another pint glass for a patron a few barstools down, sliding it down the counter and looking back at Nora with an amused twinkle. “He’ll turn into a robot. He won’t know how to react. Make sure to ask one of the boys to record it for you so I can blackmail him with it forever.”  
Imagining it, Nora is still smiling when Penny’s name calls her to the other side of the counter. Leaving her alone to people-watch and observe the establishment with a filmmaker’s eye. 
Miniature planes hang from the ceiling, swaying in the breeze that cuts in with the opening and closing of the door. A wood island separates one side of the bar from the other, stacked high with an assortment of colorful glass bottles that gleam in the fading sunlight. 
A golden wash spills through the back windows, and the Hard Deck is filling up fast with civilians, veterans, and servicemen alike. They’re the easiest to spot, wearing  their service khakis and all. 
Music swells through the bar, and Nora spies a jukebox in the corner, drawing a line five deep, all waiting for their turn to select the next 1980s classic. She recognizes the current song from her white dad music playlist. 
‘Take It Easy’ by Eagles. Track four, baby. 
Over her shoulder, a tight-knit crowd surrounds the pool table. They throw jeers and jokes at each other with familiarity, and Nora watches them for a moment too long, dragging her tired eyes away when one of them starts to turn in her direction. 
She checks her phone, under the bar, not on top, of course, unless Nora wants to buy the whole room a round. A little after 8:30 now. She just needs a kill another hour or so, and then, that’ll feel like an acceptable time to crawl into bed and sleep for the next ten hours. 
Fingers dancing through her tote, Nora fishes out her favorite journal, setting it down flat on the least sticky surface she can find. Leather-bound, stuffed to the brim with colorful sticky notes and touch-creased photographs. Further searches reveal that Nora left her pens back at the apartment, somewhere in one of those suitcases that had gotten packed and unpacked in an attempt to burn time. 
“Do you have a spare pen?” 
A blue pen rolls over to her waiting hands as Penny passes with a wink and dashes down the counter to fill a round of drinks. She has that endless energy that Nora needs a few coffees to achieve. 
Thinking it makes Nora’s lids feel even heavier. 
Tracks switch again on the jukebox, and Nora hums along to the new song, another winning installment on her white dad music playlist. Has the United States Navy hacked her Spotify account or something? She cuts through the pages like a surfboard through an ocean wave to find a fresh page, and Nora spins the pen between manicured fingers, mouthing the lyrics to ‘Dancing in the Dark’ under her breath. 
Her brain is a firework show, thoughts shooting off high and fast, bursting into a million different directions. Loud and colorful. She can be like this on her best day, but a severe lack of sleep – or in this case, horrible jet lag – makes it a million times worse. 
A long blank stare at the page later, Nora manages to piece a few words together into what might resemble a coherent thought, with emphasis on the word might here.
And right as Nora clicks the pen and presses it down on the page, denting the lined paper beneath the blue ink, an empty pint glass is set down on the counter, a few inches from her left hand. A whiff of cologne fills her nostrils, a little overbearing but still pleasant. 
Fingers drum against the wood, in time with the music, and determined, despite the distraction, to pin down the semi-coherent thoughts that are now fleeing like scattered mice, Nora reaches for her drink and finds it empty save for half-melted ice and an orange rind. 
“Buy you another one, sweetheart?” 
She looks up, in spite of herself, and damn. 
He is handsome as hell, heart-aching levels of handsome, a little like looking into the sun. Like a goddamn movie star, all broad shoulders and perfect, slicked back blonde hair, and easy confidence that fits him like a well-worn shirt. 
He plucks the rocks glass easily from her stunned grip, holding it between two fingers, a loose, almost careless hold, and damn her to hell, Nora swallows against her suddenly dry mouth. 
She really needs to go to bed. Among other things. 
Green eyes study the contents of the glass, then flick back over to her, and Nora is hit with the full force of a mega-watt smile. 
Dimples out. Ready to film a tooth-whitener commercial. 
“Bourbon girl? I’m impressed.” 
“Why?” Nora drawls, and hell, the word comes out of her mouth a little rough. Get it together. Put away the bedroom voice. She clears the cobwebs from her throat. “Because I look like I’d order a cosmopolitan in a dive bar and act surprised when I’m given a vodka cran?” 
He seems to take look as an invitation, dragging his eyes over the soft t-shirt, a little damp over the shoulders from her shower, and the faded blue jeans that hang loosely from her legs, an old pair with a rip in the knee big enough that Nora might soon need to give them a second life as shorts. 
His appraisal stalls out on her blood-red lips, tracing the shape of them, getting the lay of the land. And then, slowly rises back to meet her gaze. All the while, smiling like a pageant contestant. 
“Name’s Hangman.”
Record scratch. He’s a pilot.
Goddamn pilots. 
“That doesn’t sound like a name,” Nora drawls back, matching his conceited-ass smile with her freshly chilled ice-cold bitch smirk. “And I can buy my own drinks.” 
Rudeness isn’t her drug of choice, but Nora clocks him as a tough one. A swift one-two ego punch should do the trick, rejecting his advance and mocking his precious call sign in one fell swoop. Aviators toss those around more than their actual names.
He’ll leave now.
She stares him down, and Mr. Pilot stares right back, eyes amused and sparkling in the twinkling lights dancing right above the bar, tucked between the steins. 
Any minute now.
He doesn’t move an inch, and if possible, the Barbie and Ken smile grows even wider on his perfect face. He’s so hot, Nora kinda wants to break his nose just to make something on his face crooked. 
“It’s my call sign.” 
She is so tired. It trips off her tongue, almost out of habit: “Well, I’m not calling you Hangman. What’s your actual name?” 
Why…. Why would those words come out of her mouth, instead of the ‘Get lost, Malibu Barbie’ that was locked and loaded in the back of her mind? Damn damn damn. 
She doesn’t fool around with pilots, not after Charlie’s history with Pete Mitchell and her own Air Force sperm donor who couldn’t be bothered to call more than once a year. And especially not, when Nora will be working on the base for the next two months. What if Nora ran into him?
The edge of Hangman’s mouth twitches into a slow, dangerous smile, and Nora catches a flash of his canines, ultra-white like the rest of his teeth. 
She fiddles with the pen cap, rolling and bending it between her pointer finger and thumb. Waits impatiently for him to give her an answer that gives her the opening needed to send him packing, back to the pool table to make better use of his bulging arm muscles over there. 
Some co-ed girls push behind him, stumbling and giggling to each other, and in stepping out of their way, Hangman inches forward into her space. Breath warm at her nape, stirring the pale strands loose at her cheekbones, too short to remain tucked behind her ears without a fight.
Clever fingers capture one and brush it back into place, softly brushing against the side of her neck. His words are a low, hot rumble against the shell of her ear: “It’s Jake. Lieutenant Jake Seresin.” 
Oh, Nora thinks, warm all over in a way that has nothing to do with the sticky heat of the night. Oh shit. 
She has the borrowed pen in a chokehold, gripping it hard enough to redden her fingertips, and Hangman – now Jake notices. His grin widens, and Nora forces herself to loosen the hold, to let the blood flow back into her hands, to regain some of her composure.
“Let me buy you a drink.” 
Not a question this time, so Nora doesn’t need to give him a yes or no. 
He’s offered a loophole, one around her own better judgment, without even realizing it. She can just drop her shoulders with casual indifference, as if to say if you insist, and turn back to her journal. Pretend not to feel his intent, most definitely intrigued gaze on the side of her face. 
It’s a free drink, and Nora’s hardly encouraging him. What is the harm, really?
A smug smile crosses his face when Penny comes over, an unreadable expression on her face, and Nora doesn’t stop him from ordering another Old Fashioned. He’s close enough now to feel the evening heat radiating from his tan skin, exposed where the sleeves of his t-shirt cut across his biceps. 
Nora is not enabling anything. Not at all. 
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Rooster is on the last swallow of his beer when Phoenix looks over his shoulder and groans, a dramatic and drawn-out sound that would’ve made her an excellent soap opera star in a different life. He barely has time to snort before Bob appears at her side, a look of sudden concern on his clean-shaven face.
“What’s wrong?”
“We’re never getting our next round.” Phoenix rigidly jerks her head in the direction that Hangman disappeared a few minutes ago. Too long ago, now that Rooster thinks about it. “Bagman got distracted.” 
This is enough to bring the rest of the Daggers to attention. They round the pool table one by one, incited by the suggestion that Hangman might get out of buying them drinks. 
“Distracted,” Payback lets out a sardonic snort. He leans on the pool cue like a walking stick, towering over the rest of them with Rooster seated. “He probably forgot to order the round. Idiot.” 
“I don’t blame him,” Fanboy drawls, looking to the center of the room, waggling his brows. “I think I’d let her distract me anytime, anywhere. Is that not the hottest woman you’ve ever seen step foot in this bar?” His eyes go wide, almost panicked, darting to the only woman in their ranks. “No offense, Phoenix.” 
Phoenix shows no sign of hearing him, and Rooster and Payback share a disbelieving look over the WSO’s head, snickering underneath their amazing mustaches. Lucky son of a bitch. 
“Poor girl,” Phoenix muses with a slow shake of her head, sending her loose curls cascading over her shoulders. “Someone needs to launch a rescue mission. He’s practically drooling into her glass. And…” Something changes in her expression. “Did I hit my head in the cockpit this afternoon and not remember it? Does that girl look familiar to anyone else?” 
“Never seen her before in my life,” Payback says, slapping his WSO on the shoulder, which seems to give Fanboy the confidence to add in, “I’d love to get further acquainted though. Think I can swoop in and steal her from Hangman?”
Phoenix has already pulled out her phone, paying no attention to the round of low chuckles and smirks that are shared between the men. Her fingers skate across the screen, faster than an F-18 on descent, and Rooster looks over his shoulder to get in on the joke. 
It takes him all of two seconds to find them, mostly because Hangman has just flashed that thousand-watt smile that could probably blind an enemy dogfighter. 
He leans against the counter, the cocky bastard, with a pint glass in his hand – one that should be in all of their hands right now. Not an empty glass filled with an inch of foam. Looking down at the barstool next to him, or more specifically, at the woman perched there.
Slender, blonde, dressed down in a t-shirt and jeans, and most definitely a civilian. He can’t accurately weigh in on Fanboy’s assessment, at least until Rooster can catch a glimpse of her face. 
“I knew it!” 
All of them startle when Phoenix makes the announcement and looks up from her phone with the victorious expression of someone who’d just shot down Maverick in a dogfight. She waves her phone in front of their faces, too fast for him to make out more than a blur of words and pictures. 
“I fucking knew it. I follow her on Instagram.” And the wide smile on Phoenix’s face be described as nothing short of gleeful gloating. She cackles to herself, leaning over to show the screen to Bob again. “And you little shits made fun of me for loving documentaries so much. Who’s laughing now?”
Documentaries…. 
Recognition tugs at the edge of his drunken memory.
“Her name is – ” 
She turns, and Rooster sees her face. 
“Well, I’ll be damned,” Rooster calls out, and Phoenix and Bob startle at the sudden change in volume, brown and blue eyes shooting up from the phone like Rooster blared an airhorn between their heads. He ignores them. “Am I seeing things, or Nora fucking Rogers, is that you?” 
Everyone in a 10-foot radius looks at him, exchanging looks and eye rolls, dismissing him as belligerent but harmless, but Rooster ignores them, keeping his eyes locked on one woman. 
Cornflower blue eyes survey the crowded room, sifting through the noise to place the voice, and finally, land on him. Surprise softens her features. And as the jukebox switches tracks, another crooning 1980s love song pouring through the speakers, Nora Rogers smiles at him for the first time in half a decade.
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“Bradley Bradshaw, from beyond the grave.” 
It really is him. This… six-foot-something hallucination with tree-trunk arms and a ridiculous porn star mustache and a familiar gleam in his eyes that spelled trouble. Did Charlie know Bradley would be here? She might’ve mentioned that. Nora looks up at him… and up again, because goddamn, were all Naval aviators so fucking tall?
An awkward beat passes where Bradley and Nora seem to grapple for the right greeting for a person you hadn’t seen in years and hadn’t seen all that often in the first place and mutually, come up empty-handed. 
They’d met all of four or five times over the years, courtesy of the long-distance friendship that blossomed between Aunt Charlie and his mother Carole after Pete had left his Top Gun instructor post and shipped out again. She could use the extra friend without her husband, Charlie had said. 
And then, Nora got older and became Charlie’s backup plus one to some Naval Aviation functions, usually thrown by Top Gun graduates who passed through when Charlie was a civilian instructor. She’d see him there every once in a while, all grown up and pursuing his dreams of becoming a pilot. 
And then, Nora thinks absently, there was that one time…
She should’ve remembered that Bradley Bradshaw is a hugger. 
Making up his mind for them both, Bradley reaches out and tugs her against his chest. And for one moment, Nora can feel the muscled strength of his arms banded around her torso, the firmness of his chest underneath the open Hawaiian shirt and incredibly thin white tank; can practically make out the ridges of his abs through the fabric. 
It is barely longer than a brief squeeze, but as Nora pulls back, an unnatural but not entirely unexpected lightness buzzes in her chest. She is quick to blame it on the lack of sleep and dark liquor coursing through her veins.
She is feeling all kinds of strange tonight. 
Like earlier, when Jake Seresin handed over the Old Fashioned, an unshakable curl to his lips, and as Nora took a delicate sip, watched the movement with half-lidded eyes; the muscles that worked in her throat. Like Jake wanted nothing more than to follow the path with his mouth, and Nora could picture him sprawled across her bed, clear as a snapshot: chests heaving, sweat dripping, tongue dragging across her pulse point, his large hand a collar around her throat. 
Right then. Silly little thoughts like that. 
Nora clears her throat, tugging at the neckline of her tee, and almost unbidden, like a magnetic pull, her gaze wanders back to him, standing in nearly the exact same spot at the bar, collecting a round of drinks. He apparently owed the group for the last pool game or something.
She can’t help but notice a new tension in his shoulders that wasn’t there a few minutes ago. She can tell, having been slightly too preoccupied with the strong line of his shoulders over at the bar for her own liking. He’d seemed so casual at the bar, so relaxed. 
Is Jake mad? At Bradley, for interrupting them? At Nora, for coming over here?
These seem to be his friends. He was playing pool with them after all, up until Jake approached her at the bar. And Nora was hardly even talking to him at the bar, scribbling in her notebook and entertaining the occasional question as Jake seemed content to stand at her shoulder and watch. 
“What’s your name?” 
“What’re you doing in Fightertown?” 
“What do you do for work?” 
“A filmmaker? Like Quentin Tarantino?” 
And Nora had been incised enough to set her pen down and stare him down. “I make documentaries, and if I did make movies, I’d at least like to be compared to someone decent. Not some piece-of-shit asshole director.”
His brows rose, but Jake looked unperturbed. “Like who?” 
“Like… I don’t know, Nora Ephron or Greta Gerwig. You probably don’t even know who Nora Ephron is, do you? Do you also think Fight Club is a love letter to toxic masculinity?” 
He exhaled a laugh, brows still halfway to his hairline, and opened his mouth to reply when Bradley called her name, and Nora was gone before Jake could get another word in.
Still. Seeing him look so… Tense? Dejected? Annoyed?
It makes her feel off-kilter. 
Maybe Jake just wanted to chat her up at the bar and go back to his friends, not to be bothered for the rest of the night. She’s ruined that plan by coming over here, invited or not. It shouldn’t matter. She can’t stop herself from wondering anyway. God. Why do you even care?
She doesn’t know him, and after tonight, she’ll likely never see him again. 
He starts to turn, and Nora slingshots her gaze back to Bradley, refusing to be caught watching him, who is looking down – and down – with a rose-colored hue to his face. A pair of aviator sunglasses sit crookedly over his eyes, showing her reflection. 
She takes a half-step back to not have to crane her neck so much to meet his eyes. Raises her voice to be heard over the music, much closer to the jukebox now. “What are you doing here? I might be out of the loop, but didn’t you already graduate from Top Gun? Like many, many years ago?” 
“She’s calling you old, Rooster,” Jake cuts in, reappearing and passing out the few bottles and glasses around the circle. Seven total, including another Old Fashioned that Nora probably doesn’t need but still accepts. He shoots her a wink over the glass. “You gonna take that, man?” 
“I was not, you jackass,” Nora shoots back, the second Old Fashioned blurring the lines between her brain and her mouth.
Jake settles against the pool table in a casual stance, arms crossed across his chest, biceps bulging. She must’ve imagined the earlier tension. He seems fine now, watching her with a smirk.
“I didn’t expect to see anyone I knew here. Answer the question, Bradshaw.” 
Bradley’s laugh is a little loud, a little unsteady. One look at the nearest hightop table, littered with empty beer bottles and pint glasses, tells her everything she needs to know. 
Bradley Bradshaw is tipsy. Color shines high in his cheeks.
“‘What am I doing here?’ You’re on a Naval base, darling, which makes me,” Bradley pushes the glasses up the bridge of his nose and with the hand holding the new beer bottle, gestures to his own chest. Covered in that shirt that is… not hiding much, “the law around these parts. I ask the questions around here.” A dark-haired woman rolls her eyes behind his back. “What the hell are you doing here, civilian? You following me around now?” 
Oh wow. He’s so drunk. 
“In your dreams.”
She doesn’t like the look on his face; doesn’t trust what drunk Bradley might spit out next in a public setting, so Nora brings them back to more even ground, summarizing everything with a short and sweet, “I’m doing Charlie a favor” that is more or less true. Gives him the barest rundown of her past 48 hours, all too aware of the four Naval aviators standing within earshot, shooting her curious glances and waiting for an introduction. 
“It’s your turn now.” 
“We were here on a special detachment. Eight months ago. Top secret shit,” Bradley offers in an oh so serious tone. All of his concentration seems to go towards hiding a smile. It’s given away by the obvious twitch of his mustache, dampening the effect slightly. “I can’t talk about it, or Cyclone will shoot me out of an airlock.” 
“We’re on the ground, Rooster.” 
“Semantics, Payback. He will take me up into the atmosphere in an F-18 just to shoot me into space. And then, probably like, come down here and have one black coffee in victory. Happy now?” 
Nora offers, “I actually have some security clearance.”
Some was probably an exaggeration. Charlie set her up with a director who needed an assistant, back when Nora really needed another project under her belt to build her portfolio. Lightly sensitive, all for internal use, of course.
“No shit. Aren’t you special?” 
Drenched in sarcasm, but Bradshaw is looking at her over the edge of his pint glass with a hint of something else in his brown eyes.
Nope. No. Not going there tonight. 
“Now, Bradshaw.” She delivers a light slap to his chest, and Bradley looks down, amused. It’s a little more familiar than Nora was going for. She probably didn’t need another drink. “When are you going to stop being rude and introduce me?” 
His arm settles over her shoulders, swiveling her like a Hard Deck barstool to face the rest of the group. They go down the line, one by one. Call signs, then their first and last names, upon request because Nora refuses to call a bunch of grown men things like Rooster and Fanboy. Phoenix is actually a damn cool name. 
Phoenix, Fanboy, Payback, and Bob.
Natasha, Mickey, Reuben, and Bob again.
“And Hangman,” Jake finishes, a pronounced twang in his voice that Nora didn’t notice before. She was missing the accents earlier, wasn’t she? “We met at a little spot not far from here. I was the devastatingly handsome man buying you a drink.” 
“Sorry,” Nora shoots back, all calm and collected. “I don’t think I know a Hangman. Doesn’t sound like a real name to me.” 
A muscle twitches in his cheek. “Jake.” 
“It’s all coming back now.” And Nora doesn’t mean for it to come out so quiet, so intimate. “Hi Jake.” 
He flashes her a dimpled grin, all soft edges. “Hi Nora.” 
It’s so damn charming that Nora has to bite back an unbidden smile, but with the high-speed attention of an F-18 pilot, Jake catches it, the smug son of a bitch. He lifts his beer to his mouth and shoots her a heated look that curls her toes inside her boots. 
“So,” Phoenix interjects, glancing between them with an all too knowing look that makes Nora flush. “Who is up for another round of pool?” 
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She should’ve stuck to her original plan, which would have seen her leave over an hour ago. Already curled up under the sheets for a long, much-needed sleep by now. 
But Nora is having too much fun, sitting on a barstool near the pool table, watching the game and listening to them trade insults and stories (just the non-classified ones, of course) back and forth. All of them seem to know each other well, and Nora learns early on that Captain Mitchell recruited them for this special top-secret detachment a few months back. 
“We’re still here under Maverick as an actual squadron now. We’re… I’m sorry, I’m not exactly sure what I can and can’t tell you,” Bob explains, cutting himself off with a sheepish expression. He is damn cute, clean-shaven and baby-faced. Easygoing. He reminds her a little of a duckling, jabs rolling off his back like water. “You can ask Maverick on Monday. Are you just following him around with a camera or…?”  
She gives him the quick run-down, well aware that the Daggers are all within earshot now, not even pretending not to eavesdrop on the conversation. “It will probably be a good bit of interviews and additional footage. It’s not just about Captain Mitchell. I’ll be focusing on the whole team.” 
“We’ll probably be seeing a lot of you then.” 
It is a perfectly nonchalant observation, but Nora’s heart does a stuttered thump-thump in her chest, the exact same realization piercing through her intoxicated brain way too late. If Maverick is their CO, then Bob is on the team that Nora will be profiling in the feature. All of them are. Which means...
She will be seeing them. Probably every single day.  
Nora manages to get out an even, “I guess so.” 
She remembers the cardboard box of files, sitting unopened next to her overturned suitcase, and wants to bang her head against a wall. Instead, Nora washes down the overwhelming sense of uh oh with a too-quick gulp of her drink. Green eyes burn against the side of her face, stinging like the bourbon in her nostrils. 
Natasha drops onto the next barstool over, providing the perfect distraction from her thoughts. She’s just landed an impressive sequence of shots against Mickey and Reuben, who now stand staring down at the table, hands on hips in identical stances of contemplation.
“I follow you on Instagram,” Natasha admits, snagging her beer bottle from a nearby table and waving off the popcorn that Bob offers her. “And I have to tell you. I have invited these idiots over to watch documentaries with me more times than I can even remember. Tried different topics too. Bob is the only one who ever comes over. Don’t let them convince you otherwise.” 
“Oh, I won’t. I can smell a fraud a mile away,” Nora reassures, a conspiratorial gleam in her eyes to match the other woman, “but I, for one, would love an invitation to watch a documentary with you. Make it a weekly thing while I’m here.” 
And Natasha grins wide enough to inspire warm and fuzzy feelings in her chest. Is this what budding friendship felt like? She has been on the move so much lately. She’d almost forgotten. 
“Nora is my friend, Phoenix,” Bradley cuts in, sunglasses sliding further and further down his nose. His large hand comes up to deliver a playful push to the other woman’s shoulder. “Stop trying to steal her away from me. Get your own friend.” 
“We’re friends now, are we, Bradshaw?” Nora can’t help her laugh, slightly mocking, light enough not to be mistaken as rejection. “I haven’t seen you in like… five years. You probably don’t even know my birthday.” 
He pouts. “Phoenix doesn’t know your birthday either.” 
“It’s in August. She posted about it on her Instagram.” 
“Go away, Phoenix,” Bradley reaches across her again to push at Natasha harder. He loses his balance a little bit and nearly topples into Nora’s lap, only caught by Phoenix shoving against his shoulder. “Don’t let her do this, Rogers. You’re breaking my heart here.” 
“You’re drunk,” Nora giggles, an honest to god giggle, only reserved for drunk Nora. Sober Nora laughs. Drunk Nora giggles. It’s usually a sign to call it a night. “You’re drunk, and I think… I think I might be drunk.” 
“You’re definitely drunk.” 
Nice. Real professional. Getting drunk on the night before her first day and with none other than the only team of pilots on North Island that she is guaranteed to see after tonight. 
“Oh no….” Nora whispers through another giggle, and with a hand that feels disconnected from her arm, reaches up and pushes Bradley’s sunglasses back up his nose. His grin turns wolfish and… “I think I need to go home.” 
“Or…” 
“I can take you. Where’re you staying?”  
Jake pulls his keys out of his pocket and dangles them from a finger, while Bradley straightens, with sudden coordination, to his full height. Out of the corner of her eye, Natasha has paused mid-sip, watching with unadulterated interest, like Rooster and Hangman were the most interesting thing on television. Bob offers her the popcorn again, and Natasha takes a handful. 
“You’ve been drinking.”
“I stopped an hour ago, and I only had two.” 
“She doesn’t know you.” 
“Did you not just say you haven’t seen her in five years?”
“She’s not going home with you.” 
“Jesus Christ…” Jake scrubs a hand over his face, his growing irritation plain. “It’s a ride home, not an invitation to bed. You’d rather put her in a cab with a stranger than have me drive her home? What’s your problem?” 
“My problem is – ” 
Well. This is… rapidly descending into a testosterone fest.
She can feel a dull ache developing in her temple, a heaviness to her lids that is becoming harder to ignore. She needs a strong painkiller, about three and a half glasses of water, and a bed. Preferably tonight. 
“Alright, I’m calling an Uber.” 
 She reaches for her phone, and Jake raises a placating hand.
“Don’t waste money on an Uber. I’ll take you home,” Jake repeats, looking pained, and then, Bradley Bradshaw opens his mouth and takes a big breath, gearing up to restart this idiotic argument. 
“Bradshaw, I swear…” Nora presses her fingers to her forehead and closes her eyes. “In about five minutes, I might sleep on that pool table, so please, I will take what I can get. I’m staying at…” Did Warlock ever give her the address? Goddammit. “It’s… It’s like a blue apartment building next to the beach. It’s not far from here. Know what I’m talking about please.” 
Exhaustion makes her blunt, but Jake looks amused again.. More amused than Nora would give herself credit for inspiring with her drunken rambles.
“I know it. We all live there.” 
Oh. Oh no. 
“Oh. Great.”  
She really will see them every day, even on her days off.  
Something flashes across Bradley’s face, too quick for her to clock it, but Nora is focused on putting hands on her phone, wallet, and keys. Hoisting her bag onto her arm. 
“Well, I’ll come with you.” 
“Rooster. Seriously?” 
“No, I should probably call it a night too, and I caught a ride with Phoenix here anyway. I’ll come back with you guys.” 
Jake and Bradley share a long stare-down that Nora is too tired to even process. It is some sort of telepathic conversation that must be exclusive to Top Gun graduates, or a silent dick-measuring contest. One of the two. 
“Oh,” Phoenix observes, tossing another piece of popcorn in her mouth. “This’ll be interesting.” 
Yeah, Nora thinks. It’ll be something alright. 
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It is a short ride back to the apartments. Bradley hums the words to ‘Great Balls of Fire’ under his breath the whole time, over and over in an unending loop, while Nora presses her forehead to the window, breath fogging the glass with the late night temperatures, and closes her eyes. 
It does little to alleviate the weight of Jake’s gaze, dashing off the rearview mirror at every red light. He casts a sideways glance at Bradley, then opens his mouth to say something, but then Nora’s eyelids flutter closed and Jake remains silent, reaching for the radio knob to turn the volume down.
His truck finally rounds the last bend in the road and pulls into the lot, and Nora is damn near crawling out of her skin. She drank two full glasses of water at the bar before leaving. She isn’t buzzed enough at this point to blame the heady warmth on the alcohol. It’s him.
“Now, ladies and gentlemen,” Jake expertly steers the truck, one-handed, into a spot along the front row of apartments. She can see her door from here, spotlighted under a second-floor flood light like a safe haven. “Please keep all hands and feet inside the vehicle until I’ve come to a full and complete…” 
He’s barely tapped the brakes when Nora mumbles a good night and makes a run for the staircase. 
“Alright then,” Jake calls after her through his open window, accent thick from drowsiness. “Good night to you too, sweetheart.”
She shuts her door on his raspy chuckle. 
It echoes in her ears all the same, even after splashing freezing cold water on her neck, stripping off her clothes, and climbing into the bed with the slightly scratchy sheets. Lingers, like the brush of his fingertips down the side of her neck. 
Nora heaves a sigh in the blue dark. “Goddammit.” 
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end note: likes, comments, and reblogs are always appreciated. and if you have thoughts and feelings, please shout in my asks or my messages. i'd love to hear from you!
read the next chapter!
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s1m0nth3swag · 9 months
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Lockwood & Co. - Lockwood & Co / GN!Reader
Summary: The Agency Lockwood & Co decide to watch horror movies as group bonding activity.
Pronouns used for Reader: They/Them
Notes: George, Lucy and Reader are friends; Reader is implied to have a crush on Lockwood though nothing too romantic happens; Lockwood also somewhat has a crush on reader which is described a little more; fluff with some descriptions of horror and gore; Reader and George are used to horror while Lockwood any Lucy think it's weird they like it
Authors Notes: I just watched Smile and honestly this is just a description of how I think the different Lockwood & Co characters would react to horror movies. I personally absolutely adore them (and this might be a little bit more of a description of Smile and my personal favourite movie, A cure for wellness, but dw about that) so I wanted to put the characters into the same position. Also this is a little short, sorry for that whoops
It had taken you some time to get the others in on your idea. A horror movie night, of course only as bonding experience and totally not because you wanted to freak Lucy and Lockwood out with your taste in cinematic media. George had immediately been in on the idea, he loved horror just as much as you did, though he was the type to overanalyze and tell the main character what to do, while you rather yelled at them for being a stupid idiot. You knew Lucy and Lockwood both disliked horror. 'We have horror every day, why would I watch that.' was Lucy's excuse, Lockwood simply shrugged and didn't get on the topic again. Sometimes you teased him that he was just scared, by the look on his face every time you joked about it you'd almost think you were right.
Yet now, after days of slight manipulation, the four of you were neatly sat on the couch while you started with some lighter movies - in your opinion at least. Nothing too gory, nothing too crazy. You and George were even able to laugh at how idiotic some scenes were - old school horror movies was always a good start into nights like these. Lucy loudly exclaimed she was more than disgusted by the scenes of blood spill and the usual amount of stabbing, Lockwood on the other hand kept quiet, staring at the screen with a blank expression. »I think they're ready, don't you, my horrendous friend?« George spoke after you lot had finished the second movie. »Ready for what?« Lucy asked, her voice wavering slightly. She seemed concerned, and heaven knew she should be. »You think? Lucy looks like she's about to pass out and Lockwood hasn't said anything the entire time, maybe we should just go to bed–« You started, now worrying about your friends wellbeing, as well as the fact that neither of you all could actually take another late night. »Oh come on, hit us with it so we get it over with.« Lockwood interrupted you, sighing loudly and shifting in his seat ever so slightly. He seemed annoyed, almost as if he couldn't stand this entire conversation. You shrugged. »If that's what the boss wants. Sure.« You moved swiftly to put in the DVD.
Lucy had to leave the movie halfway through. Even George seemed somewhat put off by how it played out. You were the only one in the room that had already watched the movie before. It was one of your favourites, a horror movie that had actually succeeded in making you want to turn it off with how god-awful it was. Not in the bad production way though, in the oh fuck what am I even watching kind of way. Lockwood still seemed unfazed, but that was natural Lockwood fashion, by the way he sat and clenched his fist you knew he was on edge. He only had that look whenever something disgusted and frightened him deeply, like that one time he beat Lucy in Monopoly and she freaked out on him saying she'd quit her job. You were just waiting for a particular scene to play out. The one scene that almost made you hide behind your pillow like a little kid watching horror for the first time.
»I think I'm gonna throw up.« Lucy was stood in the doorway, half watching the movie, half watching the way you bounced up and down like a kid. The scene was brutal, with way too many tubes down throats and way too many eels in human bodies for her taste, so she tried her best not to watch. The sounds alone made the hair on her neck stand up. Lucy could see the way you clinged onto Lockwoods arm – who was still unmoving and actually looked like he was about to fall asleep – repeatedly glancing over at the taller boy to make sure he was still watching. »Good job Luce, you just ruined my popcorn for me with an image of you throwing up.« George sighed, completely oblivious to what was going on right beside him. He had hoarded all the snacks – he seemed to be stress eating – and stared at the screen like his eyes were glued to it. Lucy would never understand how he could like watching people get torn to shreds. She once saw him watch some other movie, you beside him, and he was rambling on about how the Main character would've escaped getting their foot sawn off. Like it was the most normal thing to talk about that! She shook her head, the images of the movies still visible behind her closed eyes. Yup, Lucy Joan Carlyle was getting no sleep tonight whatsoever. »You know where the toilet is Luce.« You mumbled, way too lost in the movie and the way Lockwood batted his eyes whenever something happened on screen. She groaned. »Lockwood, the two don't get it. George is snacking away like he'll die if he doesn't and they haven't let go of you for five minutes since that awful movie started, please get the two to stop this.« Lucy begged. The walls were thin inside the house and with the volume the three of you were watching she was able to hear every fucking thing up in the attic. She wasn't able to sleep anyway but it would be at least nice to have some quiet. George snorted, knocking off some popcorn and effectively throwing it on the ground – Lucy would remind him the next day to clean up. »At least I wasn't too much of a pussy to run out before the actual horror Part started Luce.« He grumbled, slightly glaring at the girl before looking back at the TV screen. You just sighed and firmly got up. »If Luce says it's time to stop, we'll stop, George. I didn't wanna show 'em anyway.« You mumbled, trying to act like it didn't hit you that your friend disliked the movie. Lucy knew it was your favourite by the way your eyes had sparkled the entire time you were watching. Though maybe that could've been because you stared at Lockwood for the better half.
Minutes later Lucy met before mentioned boy in the kitchen, both getting a glass of water before bed. »You liked the movies the two showed?« Lucy asked, raising her eyebrows in question as she remembered how unbothered the slightly older boy had looked. »God's no I was about to pass out if you hadn't stopped them.« He huffed. Now that he had mentioned that, Lockwood did look a little pale, well, paler than he usually was. »Don't tell them though. They shoved their favourite. They told me after you were gone, all the little details and everything.« He looked out the kitchen window, a small smile on his face. »Ew, you're looking like a lovesick puppy. Disgusting.« Lucy joked, softly nudging Lockwood as she put down her finished glass. Lockwood chuckled in response yet he didn't look at Lucy. »Maybe I am.« he simply hummed, grinning to himself.
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sugarschnaps · 8 months
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Leland HCs, because he died in Chapter Four
My heart has been broken by fanfiction countless times with Leland dying omg. (You know who you are) Anyways so I decided to write some Leland Golden boy McKinney HCs!!! They're mostly for my comfort and my inexplicable thoughts. Went from Leland hater to Leland brainrot real fast. Thank you, fanfiction authors! You're a gift to the planet <3 Not used to writing for characters that aren't my ocs, and these are purely my own comfort hcs, so hopefully you guys don't mind my little contribution to the fandom. I might post other hcs if people want? idk Side note: These are also kind of somewhere between "soft boyfriend" and "part time group dad" energy, interpret these how you want. :D
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He's not big on slushies originally. Probably not a big fan of cold things generally with a few exceptions of course, but he can't resist seeing you so excited to try the new flavour and wanting to drag him along. (At the time, probably blue raspberry. It came out in '74!) And of course, he'll go with you. You manage to persuade him to try it. He winds up enjoying them quite a lot. Blue raspberry is his favourite from then on, though you can never quite tell if it's the flavour that he likes or the fact that you introduced it to him.
He doesn't like hot custard. Can't explain that one, it's just a thought, honestly. But he'd rather die than eat hot custard, he just doesn't like it lmao
He absolutely has a thing for you wearing his shirts or if he has a jacket on, his jacket at the time. Especially when it's colder out, and he knows he can help you warm up. He protects his friends from literal cannibals in game, so why not from the elements too? And to build on this, I also HC he doesn't really like leather jackets because of his arms. They're always tight for his shoulders. But he still wears them sometimes for style points, you know what I'm saying? (When I say "a thing" here it means his heart is swelling and he can't stop smiling. Proud dad, maybe happy boyfriend, I dunno I'm just here for happy and alive boy Leland)
He gives the best hugs out of the whole group, for sure. He's always warm to the touch, even in winter, it's like he's literally got a built in heater or something. Plus, look at him. He is literally built for hugs. Wrestle hugs? Are those a thing? They are now I said so He'd definitely have anyone he cuddles with feel safe when he holds them. (He also prefers to be hugged around the waist than higher up his body.)
If you ever go out to watch a movie with him, you're absolutely leaving there laughing. Leland is a master of comedic timing and stupid comments. He'll find a way to spin any movie to be a comedy. Horror, Romance, anything. He'll make a terrible joke, and it'll be funny. Maybe less because of the actual comedic value, more in how he delivers his jokes, or how he ends up laughing halfway through them and ends up laughing also. His laugh is infectious.
Leland gives me dad joke energy. I will not elaborate.
He is literally just such a ray of sunshine. He's a bit dim-witted at times (it's ok bb me too <3) but he makes up for it in how pure he generally is. He's a good shoulder to cry on, especially while hugging him (literally speaking as well as emotional things- sorry, I'll shut up about his arms now). He might not be 100% certain how to comfort you most of the time, but he's trying his best.
One thing I can conform for an absolute certain is that he has the most banging record collection anybody has ever known. Man has brilliant taste in music. Queen, ABBA, that whole vibe is his favourite to listen to. He has a collection of vinyls he tells nobody about. You're probably the first to know, likely from him knowing the words to things like Killer Queen especially.
His favourite song, however, is definitely Hooked on a Feeling. It's just... I can't explain it. He'd dad dance to this, for sure. He's just a little silly goofy boy <3333
If you're the type of person that sees fluffy and/or soft hair and immediately wants to braid a bit of it, he will gladly let you do so. He'll probably have to lean down for it to be more comfortable for you. He doesn't care if you're a bit messy or not used to braiding hair properly, he'll happily keep it in for a day at least. He has the SOFTEST hair anybody has ever known, he's just a very fluffy boy and I love him.
In the winter, if you forget to bring gloves or whatnot, he'll hold your hands to warm them up. Referring back to the little portable heater energy thingy we've got going for him. Also, doesn't matter who you are his hands are always bigger than yours even if it's very slightly.
He gives me golden retriever energy he's so baby That's it that's the post, love y'all, thank you for coming to my Ted Talk <3
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excelsi-or · 7 months
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summoned (pt. 7)
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Hi everyone :D I'm determined to finish posting this story by the end of October. I'm in a transitionary period right now, so I have time to do this. Love yous. Hope you're all staying well xx Also, just in case some of you read your fics on AO3 more often (like I do), I'm also posting this one on AO3 (All my other stories are there as well.)
pairing: woozi x fem!reader/fem!OC
w.c. 1.8k
part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6
"When you told me this morning your mother was a demon, you failed to mention she was the right-hand demon," Jihoon accuses.
She packs her book into her bag, as she gets up from the tree swing her father had put up after the first time she'd walked out of a conversation. She used it infrequently for the purposes of storming out on her parents, instead using it as a place to think.
Now, she shrugs. "If you haven't realized, there are a lot of things about my parents that I don't want to know about."
"I think we should speak with your father," Seokmin says. He can feel a fight brewing, and his brain is still struggling to catch up.
"I know." She glances at Jihoon, as they walk towards the car. "You might have to stay outside. Mom doesn't like angels, but Dad hates demons."
"How in the world did they even have the ability to fall in love with all these preconceived biases?" Seokmin wonders.
They climb back into the car, and she types her father's bookstore address into the GPS. The way Jihoon drives, it'll take a minute or two to get there. They could have walked, but Jihoon would have huffed the whole way and Seokmin tends to struggle keeping both feet on the ground.
Once they arrive at her father's corner bookstore, she tells Jihoon to stay put.
"I—"
"Do you really want to come in with me?" She's already halfway out of his car. "My dad will automatically assume we're dating."
Jihoon's brow furrows at this seemingly non-sequitur. "What?"
"No way I'm dating an angel." With a hand from Seokmin, she gets to her feet. "My parents are just as apprehensive about who I bring home as Hansol. So, please," she meets his eye to let her know she's serious, "stay here."
Seokmin trails after her and is surprised at how many books are crammed inside the corner store. Every perimeter wall is covered in books. More standalone bookshelves taper in towards the center of the room, where a skylight clearly highlights a man dressed in white linen. A man who must be her father. And is clearly in the middle of doing something.
"Dad?"
The man looks up and grins. "Your mother called me. She said you were bringing friends to see me." The smile on his face brightens further as he recognizes Seokmin. "An angel." He peers over their shoulder, looking for the reason why his partner pluralized the word 'friend'.
"The other friend is in the car," she says as way of explanation. "This is my dad, Tin. He'll forget to introduce himself." With a lazy wave of her hand, already walking off to wander her father's stacks, she says, "Seokmin wanted to talk to you."
The angels immediately hit the ground running, bypassing pleasantries and exchanging notes on human and angel interaction. Seokmin peppers Tin with questions about his meetings with Gabriel. 
She wanders the aisles, looking through the additions her father's acquired since the last time she'd visited. Regardless of where she is in the store, she can hear the conversation. So, she can hear Seokmin setting up a platform for his ultimate question. 
"Have you heard any chatter about a demon revolt?" Seokmin finally asks.
Her father goes silent. She peers around one of the bookshelves. Her father stares down at the top of the counter. It's a recognizable move for those that knew the angel: his thinking pose. His 'I'm considering making up excuses' pose.
"You've met Xero, so you know that she's a demon."
'Yes." Seokmin doesn't bother to add that simply calling Xero a demon brushes over the fact that she was a high-ranking demon before she and Tin had a child. And he has plenty of questions as to how Tin had managed that.
"For the sake of peace, we tend to leave the house or go to different floors when we have particular guests over."
"Like if Gabe came to visit you," Seokmin guesses.
Tin's daughter is actually surprised he's not omitting more.
Maybe her father knows she can hear them and is probably listening. Or maybe he doesn't lie to angels. She's never actually seen him interact with other angels, usually taking his business out of the house unlike her mother.
"Exactly. I tend to bring angels here," her father agrees. "But... I may have heard my wife mention something about bodies and possession. I didn't say anything, because I wasn't entirely sure. I know she's made her deals to be with me; we both have."
Seokmin nods his head. Both he and his friend are wondering if either angel or demon regretted the deals they'd made.
"I haven't mentioned it to Gabe, because frankly..." Her father looks around the store, and she ducks back behind the shelves out of view. "My daughter isn't going to live for millennia."
"You want to see her live to the end. Before the Final Day," Seokmin reasons.
"Exactly. If I were to tell any angel, other than you, that I had heard something?"
"Heaven would rain down."
"So, I didn't say anything."
"Well, we're working at trying to stop whatever it is the demons are doing."
Her father's voice quiets further. "It's not just the demons."
Her brow furrows at this. That's the first time she's heard anything of the like. But her father seems to think Seokmin doesn't know about it either.
"Haven't you noticed the increase in natural disasters? That coincide with the increase in human rights activism?" Tin prompts.
"Yes." Seokmin's already very full brain is trying to process this new piece of information. Luckily, it doesn't take more prompting or a hundred years for it to dawn on him. "Human rights activism cleanses peoples' souls, and the increase in natural disasters will wipe them out eventually when they can't shelter themselves enough."
"It's something that Gabe, Luke, and Michael mentioned to me a while back and we had discussed it. I said that maybe if we started slow, it'd be enough to keep the demons from noticing. And the humans from stirring up too much trouble to alert them."
She presses her forehead against the nearest shelf, trying her hardest not to just knock herself unconscious so she doesn't need to deal anymore.
"Obviously, natural disasters are natural because they're a reaction from climate change now. We've only just helped it along, but if humans are able to get a hold of climate change in time," Tin shrugs, "who knows?"
She knows her father's views on climate change. His usual song is: "Humans are idiots. Why aren't they doing anything about it it? Don't they have any self-preservation skills?"
Seokmin hums. "That's a fair, but currently unlikely, hope."
"As long as my daughter is alive, I'd rather that the Final Day was held off."
"Right."
Tin, seemingly satisfied with what he'd shared, calls out. "You can come out now, anghel."
She joins them and looks between Seokmin and her father. Then she kisses her father's cheek. "I'll come for dinner soon."
Her father hugs her to his side to kiss the top of her head. "Please. And bring your friends along. I miss Hansol and Seungkwan. I'll make them more puto."
She chuckles. Hansol's the only human she's ever brought home that her mom tolerates. But her father adored Seungkwan ever since he devoured all the puto last time with gusto and praise. "Yes, I'll let them know. Love you. Remind Mom for me."
Jihoon has his eyes closed when they return to the car. "So?"
"We have more problems than I thought," Seokmin announces once he's slammed the door behind him.
Jihoon looks over his shoulder, a disapproving look on his face.
Seokmin rolls his eyes. "The car? Seriously? This world could be ending and that's what you care about?"
"What do you mean?"
Seokmin explains the conversation with Tin. And Jihoon sighs loudly in response.
When he looks over at the human, she's staring out the window, no comments. Jihoon's brow furrows, and he exchanges looks with Seokmin. The angel only shrugs in response.
"I gotta get to work," Seokmin says. "You can drop me off there."
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Once they're alone in the car after dropping Seokmin off, Jihoon states, "You're being quiet."
"Hmm?" She hadn't said anything the entire way to Seokmin's work. "Uh, yeah."
"For someone with demon blood, you're not a good liar."
This gets a small smile, and then she turns back out the window. "Mm."
"Nothing? Something must be wrong." With that, he lets the conversation go.
Instead, Jihoon starts coming up with a list of things he needs to do to move this sudden project forward. But the actual methodology of how to stop what's happening is not coming to him. He does know the first step on his list is to go to the hospital and see what's going on. Jihoon didn't get the name of the hospital from Xero, but he did see a list of phone numbers of places located on the human's fridge. 
It must be there. 
The human seems responsible enough for that.
They walk through her apartment door in continuous silence. Immediately, she sits at her drawing desk. Jihoon recognizes the sound of pencil on paper and figures the human won't talk until she's ready.
So, he checks the fridge. Sure enough, the hospital name is listed as the last contact. 
Jihoon picks her phone up off her desk and tries to open it. When it doesn't, Jihoon hands the phone to her. "Open."
She does so without thinking.
Jihoon doesn't bother searching for a map, as he knows this little device has one. He wills the app to the forefront of the screen and opens it. It takes him a little while to type in the name of the hospital, but he gets there in the end.
The demon is about to ask her address but accidentally zooms out. It takes him another few attempts to figure out how he did it, but once he does, he zooms out to see a little blue blip.
Your location.
According to the app, it takes about an hour to get to the hospital.
The human is hunched over the desk. The sound of her pencil scratching along paper is furious. He's surprised she's not tearing through the paper. 
Curious, Jihoon peeks over her shoulder. He lifts an eyebrow. There are sketches of faces and buildings, mixes between angels and demons. He recognizes Linnaeus. He even recognizes Gabriel, the one angel that comes to visit Hell every so often.
Jihoon backs away, deciding to leave her to it. He can't really leave without her anyway. So, the demon plucks a young adult romance shelf that he hasn't read yet and stretches himself out on the couch to wait.
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part 8
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futbolfanficpunk · 1 year
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The Coach
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Player: Pep Guardiola Word count: 2,9k+ Summary: Reader is a fem football player who signs up for a 3-week summer clinics camp with Pep Guardiola and his staff. She starts developing feelings quickly for Pep, as she always had a crush on him. At a party on the last day of camp, while in a drunken state and feeling she has nothing to lose, she decides to confess her feelings. Warning: Angst, Smut, Infidelity Authors note: I had this in the back of my mind for a long time, so, I skipped over other stories I had started and wrote this as quickly as I could (which was not that quick at all, it got accidentally deleted halfway through writing, meh). I have the second part in my mind as well. I don't know if I'm ready to share it though, it goes against the sanctity of marriage HAHAHAHA
Edit: Part 2 Part 3
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Pep Team Summer Camp and Clinics for Professional Female Footballers. That was the title of the email you received from your agent, “You need to get on this! Let’s sign you up?” the body of the email said. You didn’t think twice. You loved the idea of working and learning from Pep Guardiola and you knew he was never going to coach a women's team. This was your chance. “Yes, sign me up!” Fucking Pep Guardiola, fucking Fc Barcelona player, your dream club. Villareal was an amazing club to play for, a growing team but Barca was your goal. Plus, you always thought Pep was charming and handsome, you always had a lil’ admiration crush on him, it would be cool to finally meet him.
On week one of the clinics, you were progressing and getting along with both staff and other players. You shared your room with a girl from As Roma’s team,Valentina, you would communicate in English because it was your only language in common. You had a good time with her, always chatting and joking around a bit before going to sleep. You spent your Sunday off together, went to the beach and around town in Barcelona, where the camp took place.
Pep had already noticed you that week, you saw him staring at you in the last two days and had his staff come to give you extra challenges or exercises, and had them pass the info back to him. You only talked to him twice, you think both times you held your breath the entire time you weren’t talking. By the end of week one, he asked to have a private meeting with you, he wanted to see what type of person you were, your goals, your drives and passions. You spent 30 minutes talking, he was really easy to talk to, his dry sense of humor and sarcasm had you cracking up and you learned that you both like cinema. You told him about your Italian movie collection, he liked Spanish and indy American movies.You told him who your favorite players of all time were. You told him your goal was to end up at Barcelona, play at the Camp Nou and win titles so that eventually you could also get a spot in the National Team. The whole summer clinic camp, if not worth for the footballing value, had been just worth it to have this time with Pep. You found that you actually really like who he was and that made him even more attractive in your eyes. You had noticed the lil’ mannerism he had and made him more likable. You replayed your conversation over and over in your mind during the next couple of days. You didn’t know why, mainly fangirling, you thought to yourself. You couldn’t stop thinking about it.
On week two Pep was now talking to you directly during the session at the end of the day of the day, where you would have mini games in groups of 7s. He would call you to give your instructions or correct something you had done, most of the time he would be animated and loud and touched you when talking to you to enphasize what he was saying. Sometimes he would talk closer to your ear, especially when it was a correction, he would be so close to your ear you could feel a bit of his hot breath hitting you, his Catalan accented words floating into your ears. By the third day he was calling you to give you instructions your already agitated heart would skip when he signaled for you to come, and when he was talking to you while you nodded you felt your nipple harden and you core get warm, you almost zoned out to concentrate on his tone coming to your ears “Y/A, you understand, yes?” he asked
“Yes, coach”. You knew thoseinteractions weren't anything special, nor reserved for you, he did it with a few players, the best ones, you could tell that was the dynamic of the clinics. Your teammates were talented players and you were proud to be considered one of the best among them. You were 23, you weren't one of those freaks who were already stars at 21 like Claudia Pina, but you knew you could be great, amazing, if you kept working and fighting for it. Pep seemed to agree.  “Real good work today, kid” he said at the end of the session on the fourth day of the second week and gave you a big hug with a few pats on your back, “Thank you, coach” you said as you side-hugged him back and smiled. “Keep it up” he said while walking away and complementing other players.
By the third and final week you felt that Pep was closer to being a colleague or a friend than just a coach, he had the chance to talk to him with other players and staff during lunches. They all joked around, and shared stories. You couldn't stop smiling when he was around, he probably just thought you were a person who always smiled for no reason. Two days before the last day he took you aside for two minutes to give you praises on your game intensity, pass progression and for trying to score more as he had asked you. You smiled the whole time not only with your mouth but with your eyes, you were sure you were glowing or blushing, just didn’t know which one. “Thank you, Pep, these past three weeks have been so amazing, a real learning experience and an honor. It has helped my confidence and I’ll try to keep working on everything you pointed out”, “Good” he said and put his arm around you “Keep working, you got this Y/N. You’re good, don’t doubt it” and gave you a lil pat on the shoulder. You wanted to hug him and kiss his face right there,your crush was peaking, but you just smiled and nodded because you weren’t a crazy person, you were a professional. 
The Saturday after the last day of the camp, there was a big party at a beach hotel’s event room for all the girls, staff and coaches to say good bye and party together. You partied with Valentina and other girls. There was food and booze. You had one more drink than you should have. You started having stupid thoughts, like maybe you should tell Pep about your crush on him. You probably won’t see him ever again, anyway, and that way you could live with yourself and not be horny and crushing around an older guy. You had a thing for older men, you always did. You had dates a 35 year old and a 42 year old. This was not a surprise. The surprise was you wanting to act on such a fucking crazy idea. You took a last sip of your drink and told the girls that you would be right back. You looked for Guardiola everywhere. You couldn’t find him, so you asked one of the coaching staff and they told you to check by the beach. You went out to the beach and there he was, barefoot holding his sneakers with one hand, looking at the waves crashing into the sand while walking.
“Pep” you shout
“Y/N” he responded”Is everything ok?”
“Yes, fantastic” you said while sloppy walking closer to him and slightly slurring your words. 
“What’s up?” He inquired
“Nothing, just came to talk to you” you answered
“With me? What about?”
“You”
“What do you mean?”
“Well” you sighed “I have something to tell you, and it’s kinda silly but I thought since we’re probably not seeing each other in person again or possibly in years, and I’m druuunk, that I would”
“Oh, fuck”
You laugh. 
“It’s worse for me, coach” 
When you got ready for this party, you got dressed for him, your cute short blue dress with silver jewelry, girly makeup. You’ve seen his wife, she’s adorable. You weren’t going to compete but you were going to show off just in case you could get him to notice you.
“Go on’ he said crossing his arms
“Pep, I’m glad I’ve had this opportunity to work with you over the past weeks. But I have to say that I found that you were not only a good coach, but also such a fun person to be around and I like you a lot”
“You make it sound like liking someone as a colleague is a bad thing”
“Because I’m saying that I have a crush on you, guapo”
He laughs while you frown like a little girl “How old are you again, Y/N?” he asked
“23” you shot back” “Well, my wife and I have been together 22 years, you know that?”
“I didn’t but I’m not asking you to marry me or anything,” you said while tucking your hair behind your ear “ I just wanted to tell you -- I just wanted you to know that I’m crazy about you and that maybe if you like me back, just a little bit, you should kiss me before we never see each other again” you finished saying while surprising yourself on how you got the cojones to tell him. “You are out of your mind. I could be your dad and you’re telling me all these things?” “I’m not a lil’ girl, and I don’t care that you’re older than me. I've been with older men before” “You’re drunk and you know what? Don’t go back to the party, just go back to your hotel room”
“but Pep–”
“I said go back to your hotel room, NOW” he said in a voice you had never heard from him. “Fuck” you muttered in frustration while you went back to the hotel to go straight to your room. Once in your bedroom, you calmed down. The adrenaline rush was gone and you realized what you had done. You couldn't do anything except cry, not out of rejection but out of complete embarrassment. You quietly drunk-cried until you fell asleep. 
When you wake up, your roommate was almost already packed.  Your head is throbbing. She said “I’m leaving for the lobby in 5 minutes, but I’ll see you there. Won’t leave until we say good-bye. Va bene?”
“Okay, Vale” you said while rubbing your eyes and went straight for the shower. After getting dressed, taking an aspirin for the hangover, and putting on some makeup, you went to organize your bags. You were trying to finish packing up when someone knocked on your door. You were wondering if your silly roommate left her card-key she needed for the checkout.
You open the door saying, “Did you leave you card-key, silly?”
And there he was, Pep Guardiola with a very serious look on his face.
“Oh, sorry, I thought you were Valentina” you said
“Can I come in to talk?” he asked
“Yea, sure but I’m finishing up packing” you quickly replied
You were scared shitless and embarrassed to see him again but also excited, wondering what exactly he wanted to say. You let him in, and go back to your bed to continue packing up your things.
“I just came to make sure you were okay because you were really drunk last night,” said Pep once in “and said some crazy things.”
“I’m okay, just have a nasty headache” you said while you finished putting the last piece of clothing away in your bag “and I wasn’t saying crazy things,” you turned to look at him “I was telling you the truth”.
If you learned anything from being with guys over 35 years old is that they appreciate directness and love confidence. And even if you were nervous right at that moment,you weren’t going to act like it. He was here, and that was a win. 
“Well, putting your inappropriate comments aside, I hope we can maintain a professional relationship and I wish you the best. I’ll see you in the lobby” he said
“No” you said
“No, What?” 
“ You didn’t come down to my room just to say this little line, Did you?I call bullshit. You could’ve said those exact same words in the lobby or anywhere else but my room”
“ Are you accusing me of something?”
“ I’m accusing you of being intrigued,” you said while getting closer and pressing your fingers on his light training jacket “ I’m saying, maybe you like me”
“You have a lot of nerve”
“Then why haven’t you said no, Pep?”
“No to what?”
You grin and let out a chuckle, he is playing dumb and you know it, he’s into this. You take one more step forward so that’s no space between you two while he stares at you like he wants to kill you for tempting him.
 “To me” you pull his jacket toward you and press your lips against his. He wrapped his hands around your arms with little strength to push you back but his hands melted there and his lips kissed you back. You pull back a bit to get your hands on his face to cup his cheeks and kiss him again with your mouth a bit open to fit his upper lip in between yours. He started to kiss you back with his mouth open as he pulled you towards him while holding your waist, he slipped his tongue into your mouth and you met his with yours. You placed your hands on his shoulder as the kiss became more intense, you could hear his agitated breathing. You wanted him. You weren’t sure how far you could take it as people were waiting for you both but you didn’t care. You pulled slightly away from his mouth, took his hands, and guided him down your ass, “Touch me, please”, he just stared at you, pupils dilated, and did as you said. You kissed his olive-tone neck as he fondled your ass. You went for his mouth again and your hands went down his torso to explore his pants. Your hands found his hard member and rubbed on top of it through his clothes. He groaned into your mouth while your tongue danced with his. You wanted him to feel how much you wanted him, so you parted from the kiss, pulled the elastic from your joggers and panties out to make space for his hand, and with your other hand pulled his hand into your in-between “Feel me” you instructed. He rubbed the folds of your wet core with his fingers while he bit his lips, drawing big circles around your core, it made you so excited you let out a small moan. “How are you this wet? He asked while looking at your moany mouth.“I told you before, I like you, a lot. I want you” you said in a breathless voice as you kissed his chin and neck.
He took this hand out of under your clothes and backed up with a concerned look on his face “We can’t do this”
“Why not? You’re here, aren’t you?” you said while reaching for his arm “you aren’t going to leave me high and dry, are you? You asked in a whiny voice and a pout, but internally you were getting ready to be rejected because you had seen doubt in his expression.
“This is a line I’m not ready to cross, dear” he as he crosses his arms across his chest “I have a family, y/n, I’ve lost control as it is”
“I’m glad you did, though”
“I’m sure” he sighs “I’m going to go the lobby before I do anything else that I will regret”
“Can I have one more, please?”
“One more?”
“Kiss”
He came over to you, held your face, and placed a soft kiss on top of your lips. You smiled with your eyes closed and whispered “Thank you”
He let out a small incredilous chuckle “You’re cute” he let go of you and said with intensity that defines him “but this ends here. We’re not going to talk about this, you’re not going to contact me. This is something that’s not happening again. Understood?”
“Yes, coach” you replied, because even though you wanted  to challenge him you know he was serious and you should leave it.
“Good luck with everything” he said as he turned around towards the door
“Hey, Guardiola”
“What?
“Smell your fingers” you said while giggling
“Fuck you” he said with a chuckle
He closed the door behind him and you did a little dance in your room and giggled. You let your body slam into the bed. You sighed and touched your lips trying to trace where he had just kissed you. You couldn’t believe it. You actually kissed him, you touched him and he touched you. He was the oldest man you ever had kiss, but probably the most intense of them all. You were warm and fuzzy. How did you pull this off? You thought to yourself.
Valentina gave you a hug near the entrance of the hotel lobby “You took forever! I almost left without saying good-bye”
“I know, sorry! Had to reorganize my bag because I couldn’t close it, and my backpack was full too! But keep in touch and best of luck in Roma, maybe I can visit you sometime”
“Good luck to you too. And text me, you bitch”
“I swear I will” you said and laughed. 
You look around to see if you could see him one more time before you leave for the one week you have left to actually go on vacation before pre-season starts. You did see him, he was saying goodbye to some of the coaching staff, you stared for a lil’ too long and he noticed and looked back. You mouthed off a “bye” and waved. He waved in your direction and immediately kept talking to the people around him. You sighed and left for the airport.
A month into your pre-season with Villareal you were still thinking about Pep and often. You never tried to contact him, but you thought of all the things you would say if you could see him again, you thought about the hotel and the way he kissed you. You had done well during the pre-season, you were disciplined, and were always in the starting eleven. Outside the pitch, you weren’t being too crazy, you only acted out during your one-week vacation in San Sebastian, where you made out with a divorced 30-year-old guy you met at a tapas bar and ended up bar hopping with him. You were chasing the feeling that kissing Pep gave you but it wasn’t even close. Your phone vibrated and you got a notification from a phone you didn’t recognize, it was really late but you weren't sleepy and watching a series.
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You included a picture from your personal trainer's gym you had taken that week. You didn't care if it seemed you were trying hard. You were always going to shoot your shot. He heart-reacted to it but didn't text back. You knew then; he's thinking about you too, even if he's too afraid to admit it. That made you happy.
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gaymer-hag-stan · 3 months
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A Tekken 8 Review That Nobody Asked for From a Longtime Fan Who Has Been Playing for Ages But Is Not a Pro - That Title Is Too Long
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Having spent a little over 24 hours playing the game on my PS5, I feel like it's an appropriate amount of time to share my first thoughts on it. I will try to keep spoilers to a minimum so just skip the "Story" section and you should be fine.
General Thoughts
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A pretty healthy roster, overall happy with who we got. I do wish Anna and Christie were here, and I also miss Lucky Chloe. With Eddy already announced and Azucena taking over the "cooky dance-y character" I unfortunately don't see Christie or Chloe returning, but Anna better fucking do!
They all look great, even the ugly ones, they look satisfyingly ugly, if that makes any sense. The girls still suffer from the Madame Tussaud's wax figure syndrome that plagued the entirety of Tekken 7's roster, but, maybe I'm gaslighting myself, I do feel like they look a bit less plasticky than some of the initial teasers? Most of the redesigns are great, the hair (Lili's hair has never looked better), water and dirt physics all finally WORK and I love how all the clothing animates with the wind effect, the Fallen Destiny stage is a great one to illustrate all of the above. We can see Yoshimitsu's fingers after three decades! I'd love to know the thought process behind this redesign lmao
I love that they finally, after so many years of other fighting games having it but being inexplicably absent from Tekken, they finally added Player vs CPU matches! FINALLY! Finally I can pick my character and my opponent of choice, pick their costumes and set a stage for them to battle. I'm so happy for this even though it might not make any sense to anyone.
Combo Challenges! We finally have combo challenge in Tekken! Another common fighting game feature inexplicably missing up until now.
Gameplay feels a lot of fun. I wasn't sure about the heat mechanic but it's actually a lot more fun than I initially thought! I tried out all of the cast and am slowly completing both their story episodes and an Arcade run for good measure. I am obviously still maining Nina. They have decided to simplify a lot of her combo throws and I am having fun terrorizing people online with them by breaking their bones! I'm also using Arcade Quest to learn how to play as Lili and Azucena, some basic moves and combos and whatnot. I wanna also do Zafina, Jun, Jin, Hwoarang and Xiaoyu as well eventually. I think these eight will be my main squad for the time being. As a side note, King and Steve feel extremely fun to play, I haven't picked either in ages, but with King I was really close!
The netcode is, surprisingly functional??? We did recently switch to an optic fiber connection type, but I'm still on WiFi and I am having zero problems!
Jukebox is thankfully back again! I literally spent an hour or more before playing the game at all to decide which song goes where lol
Something that scares me regarding upcoming DLC, is that I do not see a season pass being sold anywhere except the Deluxe Edition bundle that costs 40€... I'm sorry but I don't give a fuck about owning 32 identical gold costumes or Tetsujin or whoever the fuck as my Arcade Quest avatar... I only want Eddy and the other three (one of them better be Anna!) thank you very much!
Story
"The Dark Awakens"
Believe it or not I haven't even finished the main story yet as I'm trying to pace myself through all the modes and enjoy them, savouring every moment. At the moment of typing this I am almost halfway through and I must say, even though I am still firmly in the "Drop the cinematic NRS style story modes" camp, and I would much rather have had either arcade mode with proper, canon endings back, or a revival and repurposing of the Tekken Force mode, in an SF6 World Tour mode type of way, out of all of Bandai Namco's attempts at a cinematic story mode, from SCV to Tekken 8, this has been the most satisfying attempt so far. I love that they are fully embracing the overdramatic nature of Tekken along with its campy side and it's present from the very beginning, with Jin throwing his bike at Kazuya's helicopter! "A Fate Decided by Fists" were we actually get to choose which fighters advance through the first round was the biggest highlight so far! I did not expect to fight Azazel again in 2024! I miss his Tekken 6 design though, he no longer glows according to his remaining health or has his limbs crumble away into scarabs according to which parts of him you're hitting. Also, I do understand why they felt the need to overemphasize how "Jin was a good guy all along and he's not like Kazuya" to redeem him and attempt to portray him as a more traditional hero, but I think they went way too far. Literally every single cast member, characters who've never met him before especially, makes a point of how good a person Jin is. Also, I do understand that there were a lot of people complaining that most of the cast were ignored in Tekken 7's story mode and I appreciate that they tried to include more of them this time, but it's so half assed and superficial. Like, Lili, Asuka, Hwoarang, Leo (who finds their missing father, a forgotten plot point from Tekken 6 of screen without a single explanation) Xiaoyu, PANDA offer absolutely nothing to the story so far other than to just be there and tell Jin what a good guy he is. And I say all that as someone who is firmly on Jin's side and despises Kazuya.
Character Episodes
Thank god they have more than one single fight this time! I would have liked it if they found a way to make each of them be canon. Like, I think every single one of the Arcade mode endings of SF6 is canon, if I'm not mistaken, and most of them seem to take place before the events of the main story, as a way to give us a clearer understanding of why each fighter fights. I think Guilty Gear does exactly that too. Nevertheless, I do appreciate that each fighter has fights specifically tailored to them, with specific opponents. It's not clear to me yet if they're completely non-canon or not, as in Nina's she seems to have been hired by Lee to sabotage G Corporation and Kazuya, I pray to God this is true and she's not actually, willingly working for that asshole, like, I'm still in complete denial that they threw her entire character development from Tekken 4 to Tekken 7 to the trash can just to go "NInA WiLl WoRK FoR WhOmEvEr"... She's also suspiciously missing from the actual story like, she simply just appeared in ONE scene so far and then left without doing literally anything. She also seems to only have special interactions with Steve and Lee so far when others get a lot more. Her handling story wise in this installment is insulting, considering she's the most popular female fighter in the series and one of the most popular in the genre...
Offline Modes
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Arcade Quest
It's cute... It's certainly a cool way to mask your tutorial and the avatars are kinda cool, but they're nowhere near as good as what Capcom did with SF6 and World Tour. I must say I prefer Tag 2's Tekken Lab over this.
Super Ghost Battle
Ghost battle, after five attempts is finally fun! Tekken 7's was by far the worst attempt as the game would automatically pick opponents for you, matching you with much harder ones if you were winning too much and much lower ones if you were losing too much so that you wouldn't climb the ranks as fast and it would artificially increase playtime. Now that Tekken has actual single player modes other that the story there's no need for that, and they made it work. You simply choose from a list, and the ones that contain unlockable (useless) customisation options for specific characters are actually marked so that you can attempt to get the item you want.
Arcade Battle
I love that they still included a traditional eight battle long Arcade mode, even though they could have just had the character episodes and call it a day. My slight nitpick, again, is that they're still doing this thing that they've been doing since Tekken 5 or 6 where the first few battles are characters in their default costumes and then a horde of Namco's customized monstrosities attack your eyes... This is a huge pet peeve of mine, I understand it in the context of Ghost Battle, and Arcade Quest, but I do not want to see goofy customs in other, "serious" modes. On top of that, the ghosts you get seem to be from the Super Ghost Battle's catalogue of freaks, and are therefore higher difficulty than most, which in turn makes them actively harder than the mode's final boss which I think is kinda hilarious!
Tekken Ball
I will admit, I only played a single match and never touched it again. It is actually challenging, I'll give it that, but I don't see the appeal. I'd much rather have Tekken Bowl again back instead tbh. Also I wish that stage was playable in normal modes too.
Customization
Avatar customization is kinda whatever, but it works well enough for Arcade Quest and I don't really visit the Tekken Fight Lounge.
Character Customization however is where I have an issue. While I've seen lots of cool customs of various characters from other games and IPs, including Shimbori himself dressing up Super Battle ghosts as DOA characters!, I don't really care for the customization options? My only real use for Character Customization in Tekken so far was to recreate past / alternate outfits. Like, in Tekken 6 I would buy the schoolgirl outfit parts for all the teen girlies, in Tekken 7 I recreated Nina's 2P outfit from Tekken 4 using her Blood Vengeance catsuit as a base, stuff like that. In Tekken 8 all I'm getting is a huge catalogue of Zara's apparel... And all the unlockable outfits are either their default look with less clothes on, or weird cosplays of other characters. Why? Tekken Character Customization peaked in Tekken 6, where every single one of the 40 (41 if you count Panda, who I think had some different options from Kuma) characters had his own personal selection of outfits and items, matching their personality and look. I don't want to play as Nina dressed up as Ada Wong or in a business casual for a 9-5 desk job. They made everything way too generic and bland and, on top of that, we don't even have trademark pieces like Nina's purple catsuit, her ponytail, Hwoarang's taekwondo garb, Xiaoyu's Tekken 6 battle costume. The Tekken 5 veterans should have had their Tekken 5/6/TTT2 costumes and hairstyles on top of their Tekken 7 ones.
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Overall, I am very very happy with this game! It seemingly does almost everything right and I am glad to see it improving on, literally, every single thing over Tekken 7.
Score: 9 / 10
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