#i'm still confused as to whether i'm to be doing the 12 week not going out at all thing or not

[bengiyo]

Cooking Crush Ep 12 (Finale) Stray Thoughts

Last week, the bullies uploaded a clip of Ten punching Changma, leading to netizens to call for their disqualification. Ten and his dad fought about the matter, and Ten was forced to recognize that his dad was right about the trouble he caused for his friends. Ten and Prem talked it out and affirmed that they are a team. Ten apologized to Changma, who then went on to also apologize publicly for his own role in this. Meanwhile, Ten and Prem cleared up the last confusion about whether Prem was scamming, reminding us there are no tropes they can't defeat. Dynamite has told Fire multiple times they need to be more like Prem and Ten. The squad persevered and moved to the final round. Fire publicly celebrated Dynamite on television. We left at the duo preparing to face Ten's dad.

How does finding the sticky note in Ten's room that he already knew about land as some sorta Gotcha here?

I'm going to miss this intro.

Dish 12: Fish & Rice Romance: a Dish Made of Love

Despite my feelings about the father, it's not unreasonable to ask Prem to be accountable for the money he got from Ten.

I like the reveal that the grandmother had the money and she would have preferred they just tell her about the mishap instead. She's great. She reminded Prem to gather his conviction for his choice.

Pang, give the sign to Metha.

GMMTV loves making us invest in an competition all season just to have the characters lose and take other meaning from the struggle.

I enjoyed the precision that Fire used in his coming out speech to his mom. He makes it clear that Dynamite never deceived him, and then reveals that he's known who he is for a long time. He was hiding it to appease his mother to make her happy, but that's not what's best for him.

This show really gave it to the babiis. So many kisses.

LOL, y'all were right about Pang and Samsee.

I am glad the dad returned the money to Prem. It feels like he's respecting Ten's choices. I'm also glad he and Ten finally spoke about the mom's illness. I'm sure it was devastating for him that he couldn't find a way to save his wife.

Okay, I like the apology from Fire's mom, and how she is able to give this stern kind of acceptance with Dynamite.

The squad is still going strong years later, and Prem even opened his own restaurant.

They let Off smash some garlic and immediately cut away.

Thank you for confirming that these two have an active sex life and that Ten is still horny. We love to see it.

Final Verdict: 9, Highly Recommended. I'm always going to appreciate a show about losers doing their best and finding a version of success. I liked how often communication triumphed in this show. Things that might have dragged in earlier stories across multiple episodes got handled almost immediately throughout this show. This show also gave me Dynamite, my blorbo of the season. I love loud gays who know who they are and who they want, and aren't demure about it. I really loved the cast here, and I loved the two friend groups. They're different, but they're all supportive of each other. Samsee, Dynamite, and Prem are going to stick with me. This is the kind of dramatic stakes I enjoy most in my romcoms.

#Ben watches #cooking crush #cooking crush the series #thai bl #bl series

[strawbby-shortcake]

★ Bruised and Battered [a tyler durden x gn! reader oneshot] ★

Tyler often comes back to the house on Paper Street early in the morning. Sometimes it's three or four in the morning until he's back, if you're lucky, you'll see him stumble in at one or two. You wouldn't call it coming back "home," since this place was rotting away one minute at a time.

Tonight, however, Tyler was back by 12 A.M., which was unusual. He had a large cut on the left side of his face that extended from his eyebrow to the very top of his cheekbone. There was blood splattered across his chest, whether it was his or someone else's, you didn't know. You assumed most of it was his since there was a fresh nosebleed flowing over his lips and chin. You could hear the blood drip onto the old, wooden floor, drop by drop.

"You're back early. What happened?" you asked from the couch.

Tyler didn't respond, he just went to the fridge and grabbed a cold beer. He plopped himself onto the opposite side of the couch, slightly facing away from you.

You sighed. "Not even a 'hello?' Come on, Ty, what happened."

He lifted the bottle to his lips and paused before drinking.

"Don't call me that," he said, taking a sip of his beer.

"You're so hot and cold with me. Last week, as soon as you came back, you gave me a hug and started ranting about how to make soap and the philosophy of life- or whatever," you scoffed.

He always did this. He switched up like day and night, so you never expected the same "version" of Tyler.

Tyler grunted and lit a cigarette in response. Maybe he couldn't care less, but what would you know, right?

You got up from your seat and went to find the medical kit in the bathroom. Once you got it, you took a rag from one of the room's floors and brought it back to the couch. Tyler had put his cigarette out on the ash tray and was lying on the couch in an awkward position.

Maybe it was because there was an open wound on his side as well.

"Get up, Tyler," you said bluntly.

He obeyed and sat up; he knew you were going to tend to his wounds one way or another. You got out the rag and wiped up all the blood, put some ointment on his cuts, and bandaged them up.

"You're all bruised and battered...," you whispered.

"Hmm...," Tyler responded.

"Tyler, why won't you just talk to me for once? Let me into your mind, or something. I don't understand you sometimes. One minute you tolerate me and the next it seems like I'm scum to you. Don't you understand how-"

Tyler cut you off by gently placing his palms on either side of your face. His thumb brushed your skin just above your eyebrow.

Your face flushed quickly. "Now I'm REALLY confused. I-"

"Shhh," Tyler cut you off again. "I've got a thousand thoughts running through my head constantly, but the one that always sticks around is 'you.'"

You raised your eyebrows and opened your mouth to speak, but he didn't give you a chance.

"You want me to talk, well sweetheart, I talk a lot. You just need to listen."

"I DO listen, what the hell are you talking about?" you snap, prying your face from his hands.

Tyler swiftly grabbed your wrist and held both of your hands in his. He tightened his grip almost violently.

"No, you don't. Listen to my silence. Listen to my eyes when I look at you. Listen to me now," he explained.

His light blue eyes gazed into yours, his expression softening. He brought your hand to his lips and kissed it. It wasn't forceful. In fact, it even seemed genuine.

"I'm listening, Tyler," you said.

"I left the club early because I missed you. I wanted to see you while you were still awake. I don't like coming back here when you're already in bed. I miss you," Tyler confessed.

"I don't know what this 'club' is but I always look forward to when you come back. Even when you're all bruised and battered," you responded, wrapping your arms around his neck.

He rested his chin on the top of your head and hesitantly hugged you back.

"Tyler?"

"Hmm?"

"I missed you, too."

[END]

#tyler durden #tyler durden x reader #fight club fanfic #fight club #fight club x reader #x reader #fanfiction #fanfic #new post #oneshot

[rorywritesjunk]

(lmao this part got longer, oops, but i like the idea of them meeting as teenagers and being young and dumb.)

pt 1 + pt 2 + pt 3 + pt 4 + pt 5 + pt 6 + pt 7 + pt 8 + pt 9 + pt 10 + pt 11 + pt 12 + pt 13 + pt 13.5 + pt 14 + pt 15

pt 2

"So what have you been up to?" Sunny asked as they walked along, her arm linked with his as she smiled up at him. "I've been thinking of you a lot."

"Wh-What? Really?" Buggy asked, red in the face and looking confused as he looked down at her. "Why?"

"I just wanted to know if you were okay after Lougetown." She replied, tugging him a little closer and bumping her shoulder against him playfully. "So how are you doing?"

He shrugged, glancing down at her as his face continued to burn, whether from being so close to her or how casual and familiar she was with him, he wasn't sure, but he wished his face would stop. "I'm fine. Working towards getting my own ship."

"Are you? That's amazing!" She smiled brightly at him. "I can't wait to see it! I can say I knew Buggy before he was a famous captain."

Buggy looked away, scratching the back of his head as he looked uncomfortable for a moment. He planned to become a captain, but famous? Well, of course he would be, he was fantastic and fearsome after all. He cleared his throat and straightened up, giving her a smug look.

"Of course I'll be famous. Just give me a few years and I'll get there!" He told her with a smirk. "I bet by the time I turn 19 I'll have my own ship and crew. People will tremble in fear when they hear the name Captain Buggy!"

Sunny laughed softly, letting her head thump against his shoulder as she turned to look up at him. "Well, I hope you come visit me when you're famous. I can help you get your clothes all fancy."

"I'll need the flashiest clothes!" He insisted as he puffed his chest out, looking proud of himself. "I'll need a nice coat and a hat, y'know."

"You'd look so good in that, Buggy!" She smiled. "Maybe I can do that for you as a gift or something when you become a captain."

Buggy looked down at her as he stopped walking. She took one more step before turning around to face him. "I'm glad you are doing well, Buggy, and that you're somewhere safe."

There was a weird feeling in his chest right then. Why was she so nice to him even after all this time? What could she possibly gain from this? He had absolutely nothing to his name, he was a pathetic boy who had nothing going for himself even though he wanted to succeed at something. He pulled his arm away from her and looked away, crossing them over his chest.

"I still don't understand why you're so nice to me." He told her. "I'm a dangerous pirate, remember?"

Sunny looked up at him as she reached out to touch his arm gently. He was like this when they parted ways in Lougetown, unsure, trying to suddenly push her away, but she didn't want him to. She wanted him to be safe, to be taken care of, and even she didn't really understand why she wanted that for him since she barely knew him, but it's what she wanted.

"I just want to be nice, that's all." She replied with a smile; he hoped she never stopped smiling for him like this. "I like being nice to you because I like you, Buggy."

"Why?!"

Sunny shrugged. "I don't know, there's just something about you that I like."

"I don't get it, why do you like me?!" He demanded. This... Was a little weird for him. He didn't know what to make of her saying this to him, that she just liked him without reason. Someone can't just like simp without reason, could they? He felt himself panicking, wondering what was the point of this, why was she leading him on? He was only here for a week, he would leave her again, someone else better would come along, she didn't really like him-

"Do you want a hug?"

The question brought him back to the moment. He... Did want one if it was from her. Only from her. She had given him a hug when they had parted ways months ago and her embrace was soft, warm, loving, and Buggy hated that she had pulled away to leave him.

She opened her arms and wrapped them around his neck, pulling him to her as he hesitated for a moment, unsure where he should put his, but he decided to test the waters and wrap them around her, holding her to him. She felt him relax against her as she tightened her arms around him.

"I like you a lot, Buggy, and I just want you to be safe, 'kay? I care a lot about you." She murmured to him, hearing him inhale sharply at her words.

He straightened up after a moment, rubbing his eyes, muttering something about allergies as he sniffled. She took his hand in hers, giving it a squeeze as she smiled up at him.

"We should head back to the shop, my boss will come looking for me." She told him. "And your captain is probably wondering where you are."

#mini fic #buggy the clown #sunny x buggy #one piece oc #one piece original character #oc x canon #buggy the clown x oc #buggy x oc #opla buggy the clown x oc #opla buggy the clown #opla buggy x oc #opla buggy #buggy's older sister au

[annieqattheperipheral]

Kyle. Hi. Wow. Ok. I'm sad. Wow gonna miss u hard.

Ok so the Brendan Shanahan media availability just ended. Wow, he revealed a fair bit and didn't hide that letting Kyle go was his decision and revealed when he changed his mind from fully working on extending his contract, to ok thank you but bye.

The timeline:

Off-season 2022: shanny tells dubas they're going to wait and see how the 22-23 season goes and then decide on whether or not to extend him. Kyle all cool beans super profesh

Season: goes well normal ups n downs. Owners & board & shanny are happy

Trade deadline 2023: shanny is very pleased and now there's not much else for GMs to do rn so tells dubas we want to extend you. Kyle all cool beans i want that too here's my agent's deets y'all figure it out keep me out of it while i focus on the end of season & playoffs

Friday May 12: Leafs nation crashes and burns out of the playoffs in round 2

Saturday day off

Sunday they all come in for team pictures and shanny & dubas chat and he tells dubas you did well this doesn't change anything we still want to extend you. also everyone will be talking to media tmr you don't have to i won't be. Kyle all cool beans but I'm gonna bc the players & coach have to and i should support them

Monday May 15 - Kyle Dubas speaks to media -> he did not confirm yes/no on whether he wanted to stay as GM, answers with this season was v hard on my family and i have to speak w them before i answer in any way at all

Shanny's brain goes all WTF. Yes we've talked extensively at every conversation about how hard this season has been on your family. But like did not expect that response to the media. So then shanny's all driving home that night thinking ok i have to think about the possibility of next season having a different GM

Tuesday - they don't chat

Wednesday - shanny goes to see dubas. They talk about his Monday media availability cuz shanny got questions cuz like wtf. They talk about pressure on family in this industry both as player and management. Kyle says his agent will contact him tmr and shanny all uhh ok but I'm like still so confused girl

Thursday - dubas agent sends shanny a new contract w different financial package expectations. Kyle emails shanny that night i wanna be ur GM boo🫶 but shanny already got the ick factor going and is so not into it anymore

Friday May 19/today - shanny drove to dubas office at ford performance centre and told him we will not be extending ur contract 😭😭😭

Brendan Shanahan speaks to media

If you've got the urge and u really love kyle highly encourage you watch/listen to both of their press conferences. Shanahan speaks highly of Dubas keeps it profesh there is none of the bad blood we heard about

Kyle is so awesome, open, emotional and possibly its the last time we'll hear from him for awhile since he's no longer with MLSE nor any other org. He said in his media that if he were to not be GM with leafs, in no way would we be seeing him signing with another team like next week. His answer didn't have anything to do w having other job offers.

My overall conclusion:

shanny no longer saw the 100% passion and want for the job anymore from dubas during his Monday press conference. And it's ok if that is how kyle is feeling bc he clearly needs to focus on family for a bit now after just a rollicking season & stressful as shit playoffs. Yes Kyle was in a vulnerable state so soon after playoffs elimination and probably shouldn't have been judged for his contract extension based off of that. But workplaces and jobs are like relationships where if the want to work isn't fully there anymore it is going to turn off your coworkers and boss, and his lack of confirmation of wanting to be GM to the press really drove home that he was still on the fence and iffy about going all in on the job despite the horrible 2nd round loss.

Wherever you go kyle, I'm following you, even if you go to one of my hated teams bc i know you'll fix the org & locker room culture like you did at the leafs💙💙💙

#the complete timeline of WHAT HAPPENED WHO QUIT WHO FIRED WHO #kyle dubas #my leafies #toronto maple leafs #brendan shanahan #maple leafs #leafs #tml #annieQ hockey thoughts

[tangleweave]

Phil: 12. What was your last dream about?

13. What talents do you have?

14. Are you psychic in any way?

15. Favorite song?

16. Favorite movie?

[ Making Acquaintances / Accepting ]

12. Coulson crosses his arms as his eyes flicker through the filenames of the various reports he's scouring, not even straying for an instant to look at Jay as he does so. Twin troughs appear between his eyebrows and one side of his mouth curls up in an almost-smile. "What are you, my shrink now?" he quips, before his arm darts out and his finger flicks forward to touch a filename that's caught his eye.

But it's not a good impression to leave her with, that he won't answer her questions when he's already invited her to ask.

Can you feel that?

Who ordered this?

Mmm. Don't stop.

It was, at the very least, a pleasant dream. A tropical island. The sunlight so bright it hurt his eyes. A scantily-clad woman massaging his shoulders. A man with equally as little in the way of clothing, all beaming smile and mai tai. The normally reserved and stolid agent lying prostrate and topless across a comfortable surface.

"Beach vacation," he replies, adopting his trademark smile. "The kind of place you think you'd like to be, but if you're there for longer than a couple days you start going stir-crazy. Gotta say, I prefer being awake. I get more done."

He looks back to the filename and with another flick of his finger, sends a copy of it to her email. "There. I think that should cover everything your people need." His confused frowning smile returns for a brief moment. "I guess I get why you'd wanna set up shop there, I'd just hate to see the magic take a nosedive."

Can you feel that?

Who ordered this?!

Don't. Stop.

He's not sure whether Jay's smile is just a quirky reflection of his own... or hiding something else.

~*~*~*~

13. He circles around his desk and tugs the chair back, maintaining eye contact with Jay while gesturing to one of the chairs on her side. "May wanna take a seat, we could be here a while. Or... well, I guess I could just give you my CV, if you're that interested."

It's a calculated maneuver, and just as calculated a document he withdraws from a corner drawer of his desk and slides across the surface to her. It lists, in meticulous order, an assortment of skills that would make him a formidable asset in any intelligence-gathering operation. Military endurance training. Weapons training and marksmanship scores. Martial arts expertise. Tactical knowhow. Interrogation success rates. Linguistic fluencies.

The file isn't formatted like a boilerplate résumé, of course. He's never going to take to Indeed in the search for work. This is the kind of thing one intelligence officer hands to another. It looks like an entire feast of red meat to an especially eager recruiter... but each and every item has been crafted to remain as vague as it sounds impressive. For all Jay knows, she might be trying to pull in a Level 2 agent.

Or an accomplished backstabber.

"You should probably be warned, I'm not totally convinced you could pry me away."

~*~*~*~

14. "Is that what you meant when you were asking what 'talents' I have?" Coulson smirks again and clasps one wrist with the other hand in front of his belt buckle. "The official position of SHIELD is that we can neither confirm nor deny the existence of psychic abilities among the populace of Earth, since it's really not in our purview. Unofficially? Six to five and pick 'em, maybe someone out there can read minds, but the odds are a lot longer when it comes to inscrutable people like us."

He leans ever so slightly forward and arches an eyebrow at her. "You should call your dad after we're done here. You two might not see eye to eye, but take it from me, you don't want to miss out on what time you can still have with him. And maybe don't feed Jenna quite so many potato chips this week."

~*~*~*~

15. The question is put to him as he's perusing the coffee shop's selection. She's swiping through the display of a phone connected to the shop's speaker system via auxiliary cord -- a delightful throwback of barely a generation ago. The advancement of Bluetooth tech has led him to nearly forget how irritating it was to wrangle the rat's nest of cords behind tube televisions.

"If you've got any Radiohead on there...?" he suggests, allowing the edge of his inquiry to trail off into the ether of vague acceptance absent any further elucidation. His tit-for-tat with Jayden oftentimes sinks into the more mundane aspects of their interactions, and putting forth a band name is probably juicy enough that he doesn't need to give her red meat to psychoanalyze. He's not so much a fan of Creep (and by all accounts neither is Radiohead), and he won't say a word about How To Disappear Completely or Let Down... but when the curiously upbeat and lyrically contemplative Go To Sleep starts to strain through the speakers, a few of the wrinkles in his face seem to smooth and settle out as he takes a moment, just a moment, to close his eyes and feel the music.

~*~*~*~

16. Coulson sips cautiously at the beverage he ordered -- a simple latte, nothing fancy -- and permits himself an indulged smile. "Wow. This is good. Hope you didn't kill anyone I know for the recipe."

It's become a habit, he supposes, to throw a tangential wrench into the conversation. To trade backhanded compliments and offer up a variety of agency-based innuendos. Talking is a game. It has to be, otherwise he loses his humor... and how many times throughout his career has he been called a G-man? That's the opposite of fun.

Jayden's inquiry comes as less of a shock since trying to chase down his favorite song a few minutes ago, but he does find himself more willing to discuss his favorite film without emotional interdiction. Maybe because movies are less personal to a soul than music? Well, at least to him, that's what it seems.

"I'm sure it's no surprise I'm into history. And I imagine you'd expect something like The Longest Day. Patton. Gettysburg. Maybe even Saving Private Ryan. War films that tout heroism, the ideals of American exceptionalism, that kind of thing." He shrugs. "But those are kind of a dime a dozen. Did you know there are entire societies on the other side of the world that to this day don't even know the U.S. was in the second World War? Of course, chances are their movie theaters aren't showing American war films."

He shakes his head. "Nah, we've got enough film showing off how great we are. We need to have examples of light shining into our own dark places. Actual accountability, even at the highest levels. Regular everyday people bound and determined to do what they're good at, for the sake of everyone else that depends on them. So for my money? It's worth checking out All the President's Men."

~*~*~*~

Two years.

#From Inbox to Outbox | answered asks #Getting to Know Us | about the muses #morgansmornings #jayden morgan #muse: coulson #{ enjoy this SLIGHTLY late series of replies... }

[bellarad]

So with all the abortion talk going on and a lot of people promoting mail-order pharmaceutical abortion, I wanted to go over some of what that entails. I'm going to try not to use too much jargon to make this accessible for folks, but please don't hesitate to PM me with questions. I'm writing this from my experiences as a nursing student and as someone who has taken abortion doula training, but as with anything there may be errors in my post. Please feel free to point them out, and always make sure to do your own research and contact knowledgeable, trustworthy people.

MEDICATIONS

A lot of people see it as an "abortion pill" but actually it is a pair of medications that you're given.

The first is mifepristone or methotrexate and the second is misoprostol. Sometimes all three are used.

Mifepristone is a hormone blocker which blocks progesterone. When a pregnancy is implanted, the fertilized egg tells your body to lower your estrogen and raise your progesterone to maintain the pregnancy. When you take mifepristone, it blocks progesterone so that your pregnancy doesnt continue to develop. It's given in concert with misoprostol to both stop a pregnancy and expel it altogether.

Methotrexate is a bit different. It is also used in concert with misoprostol, but it is actually a cancer drug that is an immuno-suppressant. Its purpose in pharmaceutical abortion is to inhibit rapidly developing cells (as would be present with cancer or with a newly formed embryo) . It can also cause DNA mutations and be teratogenic (cause mutations in an embryo/fetus) which may prevent the pregnancy from being viable. It's less commonly used than mifepristone and may also be given with both misoprostol and mifepristone.

Misoprostol is a synthetic prostaglandin. Prostaglandins are substances produced at the site of inflammation in the body and also help to protect your stomach lining. This is why misoprostol is often given for ulcers caused by NSAIDs (non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs) because NSAIDs block prostaglandin production which leads to less protective mucous and thus, ulcers.

But! Prostaglandins can also begin uterine contractions, which are necessary to expel uterine contents, whether that be during your menstrual cycle, a birth or an abortion. So misoprostol is used to begin uterine contractions to help expel a pregnancy. It can also help "ripen" the cervix to make it easier for tissues to be expelled, and these medications can also be topical prostaglandin. (topical meaning, applied directly to the cervix either as a cream or a pill that is placed up against it)

SAFETY & CIRCUMSTANCES

Pharmaceutical abortion is safe in most cases, but generally the cut off is 10-12 weeks of pregnancy. The embryo must still be small enough to pass through your cervix which, while prostaglandins may help relax it slightly, is still a supremely small space. The biggest risks are hemorrhage (excessive bleeding) or failure to expel tissues.

In the latter case, if any embryonic tissue or clots are retained in the uterus, it could cause an infection that may lead to sepsis. Make sure to monitor for symptoms of infection including fever, malaise, excessive pain, confusion, shaking/chills, heavy bleeding past the first 12hrs after you took the pills or as defined below, and low blood pressure/feeling light-headed or fainting upon standing.

Bleeding is expected with an abortion - it's basically a heavy period and will likely last a few days. However, bleeding should be heaviest in the first 12 hours and be minimal following that. You should seek immediate assistance if you are passing clots larger than an inch (2.5cm) in diameter, if you are soaking a menstrual pad with blood in less than 2 hours, or are bleeding heavily past the first 12hrs.

There are many people out there selling snake oil and saying that they have ways to stop a pharmaceutical abortion once you have already ingested the pills. These claims are false, you cannot stop a pharmaceutical abortion that has already begun. Many of these concoctions or remedies or what have you can be dangerous or cause complications. If you feel on the fence about having an abortion, I strongly suggest you seek options counseling from Planned Parenthood or another choice-based organization to help you clarify your needs so you can be sure this is the best option for you. You cannot stop it once it starts.

WHAT TO EXPECT

Pharmaceutical abortions can be painful. Like I said, they're like a heavy period - there will be cramping, bleeding, maybe bloating and general discomfort in addition to potential emotional reactions to having an abortion. In general, you can take mild pain medications like ibuprofen (advil/Motrin) or acetaminophen/paracetamol (tylenol), but with anything always check with a trusted medical professional about any medications you take, even over-the-counter ones.

I strongly suggest having someone with you or checking in with you when you are going through this process just to make sure you're safe and supported. Planned Parenthood may offer support. You could also look for abortion doulas in your area - many doulas I know offer free abortion support and there may be some around you doing this work covertly. I suggest looking up Birthing Advocacy Doula Training to find resources, workers or organizations in your area.

Abortion can mean different things to different people, and everyone's experiences or reasons will vary. I had my abortion because I was 19, broke, and in a terrible relationship - but I still mourned the loss of what I felt could have been my child. I felt guilty for having gotten pregnant and not being more careful with birth control. That being said, I'm incredibly grateful that I had abortion services in my area and people around me who were supportive.

On the flip side, my mother has had 3 abortions and thinks nothing of it. She never felt guilt, never looked back, only felt relief.

Everyone is different and I strongly suggest seeking emotional support before and after because you never know what kinds of things might come up. It may be difficult, or it may be easy - only you can determine your needs, values and responses.

I hope this was helpful. Again, please don't hesitate to reach out to me for questions or support, or if you see some info that isn't correct in this post. Stay safe, keep yourself informed, and know that your choice is the only one that matters.

#abortion #misoprostol #pro choice #mifepristone #methotrexate #abortion support #roe v wade #pharmaceutical abortion

[blvckquill]

I can't tell if I'm just stupid or if people are just really bad at answering my questions/explaining things. And I think now I'm just gonna start keeping track of instances like this:

College Chem class, specifically the lab. We're performing an experiment that I've long since forgotten now but what I do remember is having a container of an "unknown salt" or something and we were supposed to add it into some sort of liquid. The thing is that in the lab manual, what we were originally going to use for the procedure, it specified how much of the unknown I should be using for these trials. For whatever reason my professor decided to change it and just said to "use half" of the unknown for both trials. The phrasing of this really caused my brain to short circuit though because when he said "use half" for the second trial I was confused as to whether he meant use the other half or use half of what remained. When I look back on it, using the other half would've made more sense because you want to basically repeat the exact same steps to get the similar if not the same results. But at the time I didn't really consider that so I asked what he meant by "use half" and his response was just "use half." I asked for further clarification bringing up the whole use the other half vs using half of what remained and he just repeated his answer of "use half." Everyone else in the lab used the other half, but that whole time I was just super confused and ended up being maybe the only person to return my unknown sample with stuff still inside the tube.

This one happened over the weekend (8/13/23) I had been hanging out with my sister over the weekend at her place and she was driving me back home. We had plans to watch a movie with my mom so she wanted to know if my mom would be at my grandma's house or our house so that we could meet up with her and go to the theater from there. I then text my mom the following: Me: Are you at the house or abuelas house? My mom: Yes ( ??? That doesn't answer my question so I decide to ask her again) Me: Are you at the house or abuelas house? My mom: Yes love I am Me: Mom that's not really answering my question :/ Right after I send this text she calls me and the first thing she says is "I did answer your question." I'm just kinda standing there going ??? because at what point did she answer my question all she said was yes. I tell her something along the lines of "No you didn't. I asked which house you were at and all you said was yes. That isn't an answer in this case since there were two options to pick from." She then tells me she was at my grandmas house and follows it up with "Where else would I be?" Idfk at home maybe? Cause it was past 7 and she had told me prior to this she'd likely be home by 7.

This one happened today (8/14/23) I receive a text from my dentist office. Now before getting into the news of this text I will say that like last week they had sent me a text to confirm my appointment for tomorrow at 1 PM. I confirmed it and then went on with my day. Fast forward to today, they text me again asking if I can come in "a little earlier at 1?" Now reading this message I assume that they want me to come in before 1 (like idk 12:00-12:30) but rather than just assume that I say "Sure, what time should I come in?" And their response? 1 PM. ??? My appointment was already scheduled for 1 PM, I was already planning on getting there around that time. Again, I was assuming they wanted me there earlier but this is. No different than what I already had planned. In this situation I have to assume that maybe they mixed up my appointment with someone else or something idk.

#baz.txt #*this is a long ass post

[pofatrgwf]

Chapter 12

Sky had gathered everyone once again. This time, they were in a restaurant, as it was lunch time. Kilo sat at the opposite side of the table from Josh, and glared at him the entire time. Josh decided to ignore Kilo.

Josh: "You know, I'm kinda craving some ice cream right now."

Axe: "I thought ice cream didn't exist in this world?"

Josh: "Well yeah, so I'm heading back to the human world for a bit. Anyone want some?"

Axe: "YOU CAN GO BACK? AT WILL?? WHENEVER YOU WANT???"

Josh: "Uhhhhhhhh-"

Hydreigon: "Well, you see-"

Johmathoscalomew: "I'll explain. Don't wanna be sitting here for like 6 hours. Long story short: I made a wish that lets Josh travel between both worlds whenever he wants. And it was granted. So. He can do that."

Hydreigon: "Although, I'm not entirely sure whether he can take objects from the human world to this one… That would be a little concerning if he could."

Axe started groaning.

Sky: "Hey, you alright?"

"Let me get this straight." Axe pointed at Kilo. "You're immortal…" Then he pointed at Josh: "You can go back to the human world whenever you want…" And he looked at Sky. "What, can you like, see the future or something?", he asked sarcastically.

Phos: "Ha… a- about… tha-"

Axe: "I am going to throw myself out this window."

Sky: "Okay, everyone just. Stop. Okay? Listen. I gathered everyone here for a reason. Don't you think it's suspicious that there are FOUR people from a different world here in the same town?"

Axe: " I just came here because I was traveling all around the world. Maybe it was just a coincidence?"

Sky: "Is it though?"

Phos: "Sky, what are you implying?"

The Lucario stood up and put his paws on the table. "Listen. Every time a human has come to this world, there's been some catastrophic event that the human had to deal with, right?" He started listing with his fingers: "A human in the Air Continent had to deal with a meteor strike, I had to fix time, and I've heard stories about the two of you saving the world." He pointed at Josh and Axe as he said the last part. He then turned towards Kilo. "You just came here a week ago. Something must be up. And the fact that we're all here makes me wonder: How terrible is it that FOUR of us are here? Like we're like 4 out of the entire 5 of the people not from this world, all in one place. That terrifies me."

"Hey, Kilome-", Phos started.

"Just Kilo is fine.", Kilo interrupted.

"Okay… Kilo. Have you noticed anything strange around here?", the Luxray continued. Kilo shook his head.

"Have you been having any dreams telling you what to do?", Johmathoscalomew asked. "That happened a lot with Josh. (Although, you shouldn't really trust dreams in our experience…) " He quietly added that last part.

"Yeah, don't trust any voice you hear in your dreams," Sky also added.

"Is that a common issue or something??" , Axe asked, VERY confused.

"Don't trust voices in your dreams telling you what you should do, but if you do hear some, that probably means something bad is going to happen. Trust me.", Josh said.

" How about I kick you in the face? I still haven't forgiven you for what you did to me yesterday." Kilo retorted angrily, before getting up from his seat.

Sierra grabbed his arm and pulled him down to his seat. "You and I both know that your kicks would probably kill him. So don't. "

Josh stood up. "I suddenly feel like my life is in danger, so I'm going to go for a bit. I'll see you guys later. (I really gotta see if I can bring stuff to this world.) " He then started glowing as he was surrounded by a ball of light, and then flew out and into the sky.

Uni had his mouth open for the entire conversation, absolutely dumbfounded.

"What the actual f-"

The Xatu of the Air Continent stood at the cliff's edge, staring into the sun.

"Xatu. Xatu. Hey. Xatu. Xatu." , a voice annoyingly whispered, before being joined by another.

"Xatu. Xatu. Xatu. Xatu. Xatu." Xatu was being poked all around, while the whispers continued. And then two more Pokémon joined in the whispering and poking.

" Xatu. Hey, come on. Xatu. Xatu."

Alakazam facepalmed and whispered to himself. "Everyone is so immature."

"Hey, Alibi-"

"ALAKAZAM."

"Whatever, Allegory. You're the one who wanted to talk to Xatu, so I don't know why you wanted us to come," Nero said, the Blastoise poking Xatu even harder now. "I thought perhaps he would tell you more than us, since you're a human-" Alakazam replied, before being cut off.

"OH, SO YOU WANT ME TO DEAL WITH THIS . I see how it is. "

"WELL-"

"The Grass Continent," Xatu interrupted. "Go to the Grass Continent." Nero stopped poking Xatu. "Okay, then what?" Xatu shrugged. "There's someone you should look for. Perhaps multiple people. If I figure anything else out, I'll send my brother there a letter."

Nero was about to head out, before being stopped by Pyra. The Blaziken looked very suspicious at what Xatu said. "Are you 100% sure it's the Grass Continent? Last time you said anything about continents, you were stuck between Water and Mist. Now it's suddenly Grass?"

"Yeah, my bad."

"You've got to be kiddin-"

"Pyra, let's go.", Nero interrupted, as he knew she would probably pick a fight with Xatu. "See ya, Alliteration! Bye, Charizard and Ty-Ty!"

Charizard and Tyranitar were still poking Xatu the entire time, but Charizard stopped after hearing what Nero called Tyranitar. "Ty-Ty? Really?"

Tyranitar shrugged. "I honestly don't mind the nickname. He just called me that one time during Board Game night, and I just went with it." "Nerd."

Over the next week, the four teams (Axe counts as his own.) in Treasure Town met up at various places to see if anything unusual had been happening. To pass the time, they would sometimes tell stories about their adventures. One day, they met up at the inn Axe and Josh's team were staying at, and a Blastoise along with a Blaziken walked in.

Phos whispered to Sky. "Psst. Sky. You don't think…"

Sky whispered to himself. "We're all going to die."

Axe overheard Phos and Sky whispering and interjected. " You can't just say that without explanation!"

Sky cleared his voice as he prepared to go ask the Blastoise a question. He approached the Blastoise, and asked "Hey… uh… do you mind if I ask you a question?"

The Blastoise turned around. "Uh… go ahead?"

"You wouldn't happen to be that Blastoise from the Air Continent that was originally a human, right?", he said in a very concerned tone, which worried the Blastoise. "What would happen if I said yes?"

"You've GOT to be kidding me! SERIOUSLY??" Josh shouted from the table. "SO LITERALLY EVERY SINGL-" Johmathoscalomew covered Josh's mouth.

The Blastoise was very confused, but started to connect some dots in his head. A Lucario and a Luxray… an Oshawott with a Snivy and a Hydreigon… a Fraxure… And then he realized. "…Every… single human? Here? In this room??"

Sky nodded. The Blaziken shrugged and patted the Blastoise on the back. " WELP , that makes things easier, doesn't it? I think we found the group Xatu wanted us to find." The rest of the group got up to greet the Blastoise and introduce themselves.

"I'm Nero," said the Blastoise, pointing to himself. "That's Pyra," he said, pointing to the Blaziken. "So. 5 out of the 6 humans are right here, right in this room?"

"Wait, wait, wait, wait. SIX?" Sky asked loudly.

"Yeah, there's another human in the Air Continent, but like, he's a prick, he shouldn't count-" Nero said casually, before being interrupted by Kilo.

"Speaking of not counting. I'm also not a human-" Kilo said, before he got interrupted by Josh, who was licking some ice cream.

"Yeah, but you count anyway, so…"

"Wait, where did he get ice cream? I thought that didn't exist in this world?" Nero asked.

"I brought it from the human world," Josh answered.

"YOU CAN DO THAT???" Nero quietly yelled in surprise.

Uni was sick and tired of dealing with these people, so the Swampert went home.

#pokemon mystery dungeon #pofatrgwf #the power of family and this random guy we found #pmd #long post #chapter 12

[nooneelsecomesclose17]

.

#i'm still confused as to whether i'm to be doing the 12 week not going out at all thing or not #the links ive found on a forum seem to say yes #but no letter telling me so #guess i'll hope my rheumatology nurse is back from leave and see if she can help #right now it doesn't matter as we're all stuck in #but in the future who knows #personal #ignore me #why can't information be simple to figure out?

[bangtanreadingcorner]

the fact is • jeon jeongguk

plot – you're a waitress that gets stuck serving jeon jeongguk, who can't make his mind up on what to eat.

words – 6.4K

"Indecisive snot, aren't you?"

The words are out before you could stop them. Your natural instinct is to take it back and apologize, but this idiot has pushed you over the edge. He has changed his order six times and that was after adding sides and removing this or that. The customer - the arrogant brat of a chaebol, you thought to yourself - looking at his menu snapped his gaze to you, eyes widening in surprise, disbelief and was that intrigue? Nope. Probably just a trick of the light.

"Excuse me?" He says, eyebrows still raised to high heaven.

You weigh your options silently for a few moments. You could try and kiss his ass and loose your job. Or you could finish what you started and loose your job. Because there was no question, you were loosing your job. Speaking to a customer like that, in a restaurant as high end as this? The ultimate no-no.

The choice was a no brainer.

You give him a flat look, "Are you deaf?"

A surprised scoff leaves him and for a moment he stares at you, and then a smirk pulls at the corners of his mouth. "Do you not know who I am?"

"Of course I know who you are, Jeon Jeongguk, I don't live under a rock." You roll your eyes at him.

"Huh." He frowns at you.

You frown back, "What?"

"I've never met someone so . . . outspoken before. Normally people are all compliments and well wishes." Jeongguk doesn't say how delightfully refreshing it is. Like a spring breeze, spreading through his veins and breathing colour into his monotonous life. This is the most excitement he's had since he went parachuting eight months ago. That is a sad thought, but unfortunately a true one.

"Yeah, well," You shrug, tapping your pen against your notebook. "Kissing ass and lying are two things that didn't make it onto my list of qualities."

"Speaking your mind, obviously did." He notes, still smirking.

"Excellent observational skills there, Sherlock." You deadpan.

Jeongguk laughs and you don't like the way it makes warmth simmer in your belly. He looks up at you with dark eyes and you privately think for all that the media gets wrong, they have one thing right. Jeon Jeongguk is ridiculously attractive. "What's your name?"

"Are you blind or illiterate?" You raise a brow down at him. He looks caught off guard for a moment.

"Um...neither?" It comes out unsure, hesitant.

"Then what exactly is stopping you from reading my name badge?" You ask, tapping the badge on your chest with your pen. You were already losing your job, so you might as well make the best of it.

He looks embarrassed for a second, eyes dropping to the table, cheeks dusting the faintest shade of pink.

You raise a brow, "So, are you going to order or are you going to complain to my manager and get me fired?"

"Fired for what?" He asks.

You want to snap at him, but the genuine confusion in his eyes made you hold your tongue. For once. In a 'duh' tone, you tell him. "Speaking my mind."

"Ah. Right." Realisation lights up in his eyes. "I could have you fired for speaking to me like that." He says, like the thought never occurred to him.

"I'll go get my manager then." You say and turn on your heel, not at all surprised.

Jeongguk's mind goes into an epic panic as you turn your back on him and he blurts a quick, "Wait."

"What?" You ask, turning back to him with an uninterested look.

"I said that I could. Not that I would." He tells you and it makes your speechless for about five seconds.

Then you squint at him with a slight glare, "What do you want?"

"Excuse me?"

"You obviously want something in exchange for keeping quiet. What is it?" You speak matter-of-factly. After a moment you add, "Just know, if it's something sexual or in that direction, I'd rather loose my job."

Jeongguk gapes at you, looking stunned. "I don't know whether to be insulted by the insinuation that I need to blackmail someone into sleeping with me or that you'd rather loose your job than sleeping with me."

"So sorry for offending your delicate sensibilities." You drawled sarcastically. "You still haven't told me what you want."

"Well, I like coming here often and when I do and you're my server, I'd like you to always speak your mind around me." He said, with the smallest of shrugs, looking down at the silverware on the table instead of at you.

Confusion sweeps through you, his request catching you off guard. "Really? That's it?"

"Yes." He nods stiffly.

"I don't understand." You admit.

"You don't have to. You asked me what I want, this is it." He looks at you again, eyes still dark and piercing and you can't understand what he's thinking.

"Fine, okay, yeah, I can do that." You nods eventually, noticing how his shoulders untense just a bit. You look at him, curious and full of questions, but cautious enough to not actually ask. "Are you gonna order now?"

"Why don't you surprise me? I can't decide what I want to eat." He says, handing you the menu.

"I'm shocked." You deadpan with a faux smile, before looking at him seriously. "Are you allergic to anything?"

"No." He shakes his head, lacing his fingers together and resting his hands on the table.

Your mind races for a few moments before settling on a dish. You nod at Jeongguk. "Okay, I'll be back with your food in a while then."

***

Three weeks later, you haven't served Jeongguk again. It's not that he hasn't been in, oh no, he has. You've seen him, caught him staring and then looking away quickly. He just hasn't sat at one of your tables again. Each week, the tables get rotated and there is four rotations, so you'll only be on Jeongguk's usual table next week.

You walked into the kitchen, just coming off your lunch break when Lee stops you and says, "Table 12 for you."

You look at Jae, who was on table 12 this week and got a hostile glare. You ignore her and look at Lee with confusion, "But I'm not on table 12 today."

"You were requested and customers here get what they want." Lee shrugs, giving you a 'it is what it is' look.

"By who?" You ask, having some idea of the answer. There is only one customer you know that would request you. You are always polite to the other customers but with an air of detachment, that keeps them from prying and you from getting into trouble. Until three weeks ago, that is.

"Jeon Jeongguk." Lee says, confirming your suspicions.

"Motherfucker." You swear.

Jae looks down her nose from you, "Don't he used to it. It won't last. He'll get bored of you soon enough."

"I hope so." You huff, as Jae walks away with a less than pleased expression.

"What?" Lee asks, her shock obvious.

"You heard me."

Lee tilts her head at you in disbelief and curiousity, "So, you're not trying to get into his pants?"

"Uh, no." You frown at her. Sure, he's hot but you know your place. You also need money than you need to get laid. "Why?"

"Most girls try when they work here, but everytime they try something, Mr. Jeon complains and they get fired." Lee explains.

Something suddenly made sense to you, "Is that what Jae's trying to do?"

"No one will say it to her face, but yeah, it is." Lee nods, shrugging a little. "She's jealous that he requested you, when you've worked here just over a month, served him once, and she's worked here for almost two years and he hasn't blinked in her direction."

"Huh," You frown, lost in your thoughts. "I wonder why he didn't get me fired then."

"Why? What did you say to him?" Lee eyes you curiously.

"Called him an indecisive snot." You smirk gleefully, happy that you got away with talking to him like you want and not getting fired because of it.

"Right." Lee says in a tone that made it clear she doesn't believe you.

"I did." You insist.

Lee waves you off, and you exit the kitchen, walking into the dining room, heading over to Jeongguk's regular table.

You look at him as he comes into your line of direct sight. His one leg was shaking, eyes shifting around the room, fingers tapping the table restlessly. When he spots you walking over to him, he stills completely. A smile - a cute one, you admit to yourself and no one else - spreads on his lips as he breathes your name, "Y/N."

You give him a look, "Did you miss me or something?"

"What? No." Jeongguk scoffs quickly. "I was bored. And you cure my boredom."

You raise your eyebrows at him, head going forward a little, "I cure your boredom?" You repeat, slowly. Maybe he's kidding.

But Jeongguk just nods at you as if it makes all the sense in the world, "Yeah. It's like live entertainment while I eat."

You scowl at him, "I'm not a circus clown."

"That's not what I meant!" He exclaims, voice a little too loud, causing heads to swivel in your direction. He takes a breath and speaks again, softer this time. "I just meant that it's nice. Or it was nice, the one time I actually got to talk to you."

"So, you did miss me." You tease good naturedly. Jeongguk doesn't answer, just stares resolutely down at the table. You sigh, feeling fond instead of annoyed. You hide a smile as you ask, "What will it be today?"

Jeongguk looks at you again, hesitantly at first, then fully when he sees your expectant gaze, "Surprise me."

Now you were surprised, "Again?"

"I liked what you ordered last time." He does that small shrug again. Actually, it's less of a shrug, and more a slight lift of the shoulders. You notice that he has broad shoulders, and the suit he's wearing only makes them look better. You push those thoughts away, focusing on the conversation.

"And if you don't like it this time?" You challenge.

"I did say surprise me, and surprises can be positive or negative." Jeongguk decides not to tell her that this is his favorite restaurant and he knows the menu by heart. He knows and likes every dish, so there was no way he wouldn't like something she serves him. And he's curious as to what she'll decide this time.

You snort, laughing lightly, "You know, you're not as bad as I thought you were."

Jeongguk looks mildly offended, "I'll have you know, I'm a catch."

"I'm sure." You nod, hiding a grin.

"I am." He insists and you had to admit, he is attractive.

"Yes, right up until the moment you open your mouth." You say honestly, writing down one of the dishes on the menu.

"Rude." He pouts a little and you suppress the urge to giggle, of all things.

"Maybe," You concede. "But it's the truth." You picked up his menu, turning on your heel to go to the kitchen.

"So, how do I . . . improve?" Jeongguk asks when you come back with his food, continuing with the conversation where you left off.

"Do I look like a life coach to you?" You set down the food. "Enjoy."

"Thanks." Jeongguk grins at her. "And, no, but if I went to one they'd tell me what they think I want to hear, not what I need to hear."

You stare at him for a few seconds and he looks back unflinchingly. "Well," You press your lips together. "I guess you should start with why you want to change."

That makes Jeongguk falter. He can't very well say, 'so I can impress you, since my money doesn't seem too' and he thinks for a bit. "I have come to realise that maybe I treat people unfairly based on how much money they have. I would like to change that."

Your eyebrows goes up, "That's surprisingly deep, coming from you."

"I'm not swallow." He defends himself.

You nod complacently, "Right, well, the answer is easy but actually doing it, will all depend on you."

"What do I do?"

"Just, think before you say something. Ask yourself, can my words hurt this person?"

"And if they deserve it?" Jeongguk wonders.

"The right answer would be to still be considerate, because two wrongs don't make a right, but I hate being a hypocrite, so go for it, if they deserve it. I mean, it's not like I held back when you annoyed me." You gave a shrug. "I should go. We're not allowed to loiter at the tables."

Jeongguk wants to ask her to sit with him and keep him company some more, but he knows he would be setting himself up for rejection. Instead, he just looks at her with a half smile. "Just when I think I have you all figured out, you do or say something that proves me wrong."

"My mom always used to say, you can spend a lifetime with someone and still learn something new about them every day. People evolve everyday and you'll never be who you are right now, tomorrow again."

"She sounds like a wise woman." Jeongguk remarks.

You smile, nostalgia making your heart warm, "Yeah, she was."

"I'm sorry." Jeongguk says, catching onto the past tense. A lump forms in your throat out of nowhere.

"Thank you." You swallowed thickly, clearing your throat. You gave him a shaky smile, hoping he wouldn't notice. "See, you're doing better already."

Jeongguk did notice but decided not to call her out on it. He just smiled up at her softly, watching after her figure when she walks away.

***

"You know, if I didn't know that you come here everyday, I'd say you that you are stalking me." You teased Jeongguk when you go to take his order for the fifth time in a row. You've had a day off, inbetween, but when you showed up for your next shift, Jeongguk was there and everytime he's requested you. By now, whoever was on rotation for his table, just lets you know whenever he shows up.

"And how do you know that?" Jeongguk raises a curious eyebrow at you.

"I complained to Lee about you and she told me." You explain to him, mentally running over the menu in your head. Jeongguk told you on the third day to just order for him everytime. So, when you walk to his table under the guise of taking his order, the two of you just talk.

"Lee?" He inquires.

"She's my friend and another server here."

"Ah." Jeongguk nods in realisation. "Can I ask you a personal question?"

"You can ask, but that doesn't guarantee I'll answer." You say, giving him a cheeky smile.

She has a beautiful smile, Jeongguk thinks to himself. He shakes himself out of his thoughts and looks her in the eyes, "Do you have a boyfriend?"

You frown down at him, finding the question odd. He's never asked anything too personal. Just normal things, what you're studying, what you do when you're not working. Sometimes you'll tell him a story of something dumb you did as a kid, but he'll never outright ask. "No."

A thought suddenly occurs to Jeongguk and he doesn't really want to ask because that'll destroy every hope he has but he needs to know. He quirks a brow at her, "Girlfriend?"

You snort at the question, "No, I'm straight. My cousin swings both ways though. Nearly gave his mom a stroke when he came out at our annual Christmas family dinner two years ago."

"Oh." Jeongguk wants to sag in relief, wants to let out a thankful cheer, but settles for just a small smile and letting out a breath of relief.

"Why are you asking?"

He does that little shrug that isn't really a shrug thing. "I was just wondering. You never really talk about one, or even someone you're interested in."

"Okay, if there was someone, why would I tell you?" You are teasing, but he doesn't know as you look at him blankly.

"I was just curious." Jeongguk huffs defensively.

"Yeah, yeah, settle down." You snicker. After a moment you say, "I guess I don't talk about it because there hasn't been anyone to talk about."

"Really?" Jeongguk beams up at you hopefully, eyes glittering.

"Really." You roll your eyes, but there was a slight warmth in your cheeks that wasn't there before.

***

Seven months and many short conversations later – in which you learnt many things about Jeongguk and vica versa – you walk up to his table with a smile, genuinely excited to see your sort of friend. The smile fades from your face when you lay eyes on him – his whole body was tense, you could tell even from a distance, he was glaring out the window, clenched fists laying on the table. Something wasn't right. You quicken your pace, concern swirling in your belly. You stop at his table, feeling your heartbeat quicken. "What's wrong?"

"None of your fucking business." He snaps at you, words so venomous it makes you take a step back in shock, but mostly hurt.

Jeongguk regrets the words the moment they're out because he didn't mean them. He doesn't want to fight or argue. He came to see her to feel better. Now he snapped at her. He waits, for whatever tongue lashing she is about to give him. He'd deserve it and he'll take it. But she says nothing. Somehow her silence was much worse than any insult she can hurl at him. Her face closes off, he watches it happen as her fingers tighten around the pen and notepad she uses to take orders, and panic sparks beneath his skin, overriding all the anger he feels.

No. His mind rebels against the thought immediately.

"What can I get for you today, Sir?" Her voice is perfectly polite as she asks the question, like it was the first time he met her. Until he made her snap after changing his order for a sixth time.

No, no, no, no, no! Not this. Anything but this. His heartbeat quickens.

Jeongguk was quickly turning frantic, "Y/N, please, I-"

"We have a lovely special today." She goes on as if he didn't speak, eyes void of the usual fire when she'd argue with him or the gentle warmth when she sometimes smiled at him and called him an idiot. It was the only times he ever liked being called an idiot.

He listens to her droning on about he specials, explaining them. Jeongguk's heart drops all the way down to his feet. It feels like someone pulled a rug from beneath his feet, and he is thrown off balance from the how utterly wrong it feels, how much it bothers him, hurts him, that she is talking to him like he is just another random customer. Like she hasn't told him how she got stuck in a tree, climbing after the neighbors cat. Playing with their cat because her parents never allowed pets.

A cold feeling of dread washes over him because Jeongguk has no idea to fix whatever he just fucked up.

***

You very almost cry when Jeongguk snaps at you, feeling irrationally hurt by his words. You shove it all down as you pull up your walls and shut him out to protect yourself. You serve him as quickly as possible, walking away without a friendly word.

"Trouble in paradise?" Jae smirks at you when you come back from serving Jeongguk.

You glare at her, not in the mood for dealing with her jealousy today. "No, just looking at your face is enough to put anyone in a bad mood."

Jae's eyes widened, fury spreading on her face. "You bitch!" She yells, raising a hand to slap you.

You smirk, catching her wrist easily. "Careful, just now you break a nail."

You let her go, walking away. You wait until you're in the bathroom, safely away from prying eyes in a locked stall, before letting you face crumple, only letting one tear escape before getting yourself under control.

You finish your shift, completely exhausted by the end of it – emotionally and physically. The last thing you have the energy for, is Jeongguk, so of course he's waiting for you at the personnel entrance and exit when you step outside. Intent on ignoring him, you pretend that you don't see him and you start walking in the direction of the train station.

Jeongguk follows you, apparently not easily deterred. "Will you just talk to me please?"

"What would you like me to say, Sir?" You ask in your most professional voice, looking ahead and not glancing at him.

"I'd like you to talk to me and stop treating me like I'm a customer." He says, sounding frustrated and desperate.

"You are a customer, Sir." You answer, still not looking at him.

"For fuck sakes, will you stop with the 'sir' already and talk to me like you used to?" Jeongguk all but explodes, stepping infront of you, and looking down at you for a change. It's startling, for a moment. You always look down at him when he sits at the table and it never occured to you that he's taller than you. He sets his hands on your shoulders (they're big and warm and you feel surprisingly safe, even when he squeezes slightly), frantic and desperate eyes looking into yours. "You don't even have to talk, you can yell or scream or shout for all I care, just please stop."

"You want me to talk? Fine." You glare up at him, shrugging out of his hold and taking a step back. He's way to close for comfort. "Look, I get I'm not exactly from the same side of town as you are, but that doesn't mean I'm incapable of empathy. I'd bet that I have more empathy than most people you know. So, when someone I see as a kind of friend, snaps at me when I ask them what's wrong out of concern, when they could have said they don't want to talk about it, it hurts." You rant, a little out of breath. "Do you understand that? You hurt me."

"I'm sorry. Fuck, I am so sorry, you have no idea. I shouldn't have snapped at you and I regretted it the moment I did it. I was angry, and I know it isn't an excuse but it's the truth."

"Sorry isn't going to fix it," You say, voice edging on being too sharp. Your heart twists when his face falls. You soften a bit. "But it is a step in the right direction."

Jeongguk perks up, "What's another?"

"For starters, next time you don't want to talk about me, tell me instead of snapping at me." You give him a pointed glare, crossing your arms over your chest.

Jeongguk gives you an apologetic look, "Again, I'm sorry. I honestly didn't mean to snap at you. I came to talk to you, hoping I'd calm down a bit. I had an ugly fight some dumbass that tried to sell low quality material to us and I took it out of you."

You are reminded of the fact that he is the heir to his father's multi-billion won international conglomerate and for some reason, it makes you sad. You smile at him, ignoring the sadness. "Well, you're forgiven but I'm not forgotting."

"I wouldn't dream of it." He grins cheekily. He paused for a moment, then smirks at you. "So, we're friends now?"

You groan, "I should have known that would come back to bit me I'm the ass."

***

A large bouquet of pink tulips is delivered to you the next morning. Inside is a card that reads:

Thank you for never giving up on me. -JJK

Lee whistles loudly when she sees them and your cheek burn. "Someone must really like you."

"It's from a friend." You say, ignoring the fluttering in your belly.

"My point still stands. Those are out of season, you know." She remarks.

You nod, "I know. They're my favourite."

You finish your shift with a smile on your face. Until your boss calls you into his office.

"Yes, Sir?" You ask, still smiling and the bouquet of flowers in your one hand, backpack up on your shoulders and ready to go home.

"Y/N. I'll get right to the point. There's been a complaint that you've been too friendly with one of our customers." He says bluntly.

You almost drop your flowers in shock, "What?"

"I'm sorry to do this, Y/N, but it is a direct violation of the contract you signed when you started here. Professionalism is our top priority. I have no choice but to fire you." He says, and he does look sorry as he holds out an envelope to you. "This is the week's wages. Again, I'm sorry. You are a good worker."

"You're firing me because of something someone accused me off?" You ask, indignant and a little angry. "You're not even going to ask me if I did it? And if I did it, why I didn't stop?"

"The accusation came from a very trustworthy customer that was concerned that our reputation might be damaged." Your manager says. "If it gets to the owner and he finds out I did nothing, I could loose my job."

You scoff, taking the envelope. If you didn't need the money, you'd have thrown it back in his face. "So, it's okay for me to loose mine?"

"I'm sorry."

"So am I." You say before turning around and leaving.

***

The first day she's not there, Jeongguk brushes it off, thinking she has the day off and forgot to tell him. The second day, he starts to worry, just a little. The third day, he almost thinks himself into a mental breakdown. The fourth day, he demands to see the manager.

"Mr. Jeon." The manager greets with a smile that was clearly fake. Jeongguk thought back to Y/N, who never smiled much but when she did, it was honest and pure and breathtaking. He misses it and would do whatever it takes to get it back.

"Where is Y/N?" He demands, voice and gaze equally cold and intimidating. It's a side of him that she broke through within minutes, digging up the real Jeongguk and pulling him to the surface. The past months, he's been able to breathe again, live instead of just existing, waiting for the next person that wants his money. But that cold and calculating side of him is still there.

The manager pales and Jeongguk's worry increases. Did something happen to her? The manager shifts on his feet but still doesn't answer. "If you don't answer me within the next five seconds, I will call the owner and ask him to answer me."

"S-she was fired." The man stutters out.

Jeongguk feels his stomach drop. She never outright said it but he knows she depends heavily on the income from this job. It worries him, because he has this urge to take care of her. He wants to give her as much money as she needs, for her to live comfortably, but he knows she wouldn't take it. He glares at the manager, "Why?"

"Someone filed a complaint against her. She was getting to friendly with y-you." The manager says, looking a little terrified.

Jeongguk clenches his jaw, "And instead of asking me if I have a problem with it, you fired her?"

"Her contract says-"

Jeongguk stands up, towering over the man in height and size. "I don't give a shit what her contract says. How many times have I filed a complaint when the servers made me inappropriate offers and crude suggestions? I never once complained about her."

Jeongguk doesn't give the manager anymore time to do anything other than letting out a squeak before turning around and leaving the restaurant.

***

Five days after you were fired, you started too feel it. The absence of Jeongguk's presence. At first, you didn't notice it. To wrapped up in finding another job, worried about money and going to classes to think about it. But today is Sunday and the diner you found a temporary job at two days ago, is closed on Sundays. It's crappy pay and not alot of hours either but it was something and it'll help until you could get something else.

You lay on your bed, listening to your mom vacuuming the living room. University housing was expensive and you'd rather live at home and save the money than having even more debt. You laze the day away, knowing that none of the projects you have, is due that Monday. Your thoughts drift back to Jeongguk, like it always does. You honestly didn't think you'd end up missing him this much.

You like him, so fucking much. You figured it out a long time ago. You also know that you come from two different worlds. You are fine with that, you accepted it and you were content to be his friend.

Now he's completely gone from your life. Ripped out of it without warning.

You go to your classes the next day. In your last one, you doodle absentmindedly on the corner of your notebook, only half listening to the Professor. When the class is over, you look at what you drew and then groan out loud. Jeongguk's initials. Of fucking course. You scoff to yourself, leaving the class and then the building. You want to go home and sulk in privacy.

Outside, the sun was shining and you stood still for a moment, soaking in the warmth.

"Y/N!" A voice yelled your name and your head whips in the direction because you know that voice. You look, eyes searching desperately because you are so sure it was his voice. You're not hallucinating and- and there he is, running over to you.

"Jeongguk? What are you doing here?" You ask when he stops infront of you, completely bewildered.

He looks panicked and frantic. Like that day he snapped at you. He grips your shoulders, the hold almost painful. "You weren't there. I went to the restaurant and you weren't there and the manager told me you were fired and-"

"Jeongguk, stop. Breathe." You say, reaching up to hold onto his wrists, lightly rubbing your thumbs over the inside of his wrists. You wait until his grip loosens, until he was holding instead of gripping. "How did you find me?"

"You told me where you go to school one day." He answers off handedly, eyes scanning over your face, almost as if memorising the little details. Guilt flashes on his face, "I'm sorry you were fired."

You laugh at his words, removing his hands from your shoulders because it was getting a little too intimate, your heartbeat speeding up. "You know, half the time I see you, you end up apologizing to me."

"Hey, it's weird for me too." Jeongguk pouts and you have this urge to rise on your tiptoes and kiss it. "I'm not used to apologizing."

"Don't worry about it, I'm not angry." You wave him off.

"Can we talk?" He pleads and you agree immediately because you missed him so much.

"Yeah, there's a park nearby."

"Scared to be seen with me?" He teases with a smirk, and for a moment it's like nothing has changed.

You snort, "Don't you know? The walls has ears and Twitter accounts."

Jeongguk laughs, loud and unrestrained, throwing his head back. You couldn't help but smile. "This way."

You guide him to the park. It wasn't very big, and not a lot of people came here either, so it was perfect to talk. You each sit down on a swing.

"What are you gonna do now?" Jeongguk asks.

You shrug, "No clue, but I'll figure something out."

A guilty look spreads on his face again, "I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have-"

You cut him off, "Shouldn't have what? Let a server talk back to you? Yeah, probably not but we both enjoyed it, so it's on you as much it is on you. More on me though, because it was my responsibility as an employee to treat you with respect."

"You did," Jeongguk says immediately, sincerely. "Even when you were at your most brutally honest moments."

You give him a slight smile. "Well, fun as it was, it seems our path has come to an end."

"Why?" Jeongguk frowns heavily at you.

"Huh?"

Jeongguk looks you in the eye, gaze piercing. "Why does it have to end?"

You snorted, thinking he was messing with you but his eyes were completely serious. You answer in a matter-of-fact tone, "Because you're you and I'm me. Besides, most of the time we argued."

"Y/N." He says your name like it is his greatest wish. He stands up from his swing, making his way infront of you and pulled you to your feet. He looks at you, eyes impossibly fond, "That wasn't arguing. It was banter. If you think that's arguing, you probably think my parents goes to war every now and again." He smiles, a little nervous. "And foe the record, I would rather argue with you for the rest of my life than ever kiss another girl again."

Your mouth drops open in shock, and you really don't know what the fuck to make of that. "I-"

He cuts you off, "And I don't want this to be over."

Silence falls between you two. You stare at him, he stares back. Until, finally, you blurt, "I don't know what to say."

Jeongguk is a little bit disappointed, but not surprised in the slightest. At least it isn't an outright rejection. "You don't have to say anything. Just answer one question."

"Okay?"

"Would you want to date me?" You choke on thin air from shock. That means that he feels the same way as you do, right? Happiness makes your blood sing. Then it sinks in and reality comes back to you. Your happiness evaporates and you swallow thickly. You open your mouth to tell him 'no', but once again Jeongguk cuts you off before you could say something. "Forget about our social status, forget about what people would say and think about me and you. Together. Really think about it. I have, and I think we could work, if you gave it a chance."

"And if it doesn't work?" You ask softly, vulnerable in a way you've never been before. Distantly you wonder how he knew what you were thinking.

"Then at least we can say we tried." He shrugs.

You look down at the ground, wanting to think without looking at him, into those mesmerizing eyes of his. He could ask you to commit murder, and chances are that you'll do it if he looks at you long enough. When did you become so completely gone for him? You think about it, but there was never a moment where you realised, this is the person I like. Maybe . . . maybe it's because you've always liked him. Right from the start, even when he was infuriating. The thought is startling, but you aren't scared by it. It's more like another piece of the puzzle between you and Jeongguk has fallen into place. But there is the problem of your different social statuses. Yeah, Jeongguk said forget about it, but for how long? If you try and this does work out, then eventually you'll have to face the reality of everything that comes with being together. Somehow that scares you more than if it doesn't work.

You look back up at him, and you know – despite all your worries and doubts – it was never really a choice because you choose Jeongguk the moment you chose to accept his offer of being honest all those months ago. "Okay."

Jeongguk looks like he's ready to argue, "I-" You watch as your answer sinks in. The stunned expression almost makes you laugh, "What?"

"Did you want me to say no?" You give him an amused look, smile curling the corners of your lips upwards.

His eyes widens and he shakes his head frantically, "No, no, no, I just wasn't expecting you to say yes to quickly."

"That makes two of us." You admit. Jeongguk is right though, better to try and either fail or succeed, or never try and forever wonder what if. You smile up at him, heart soaring happily. "You make a good case. You should have become a lawyer."

Jeongguk's eyes light up, "Just wait until you hear the case I have to make on why we should kiss."

"Tell you what, if you kiss me within the next three seconds, you don't have to make a case at all." You bargained with a grin.

Jeongguk didn't need to be told twice. He leaned close and kissed you, slow and deep, one hand slipping into your hair and the other curling around your waist, pulling you close to him. He breaks the kiss, licking his lips and your eyes are drawn to the action. You lick your own lips, liking the taste of him. His voice is deep and rough, his cheeks flushed, when he asks, "Want to go get something to drink?"

"Yeah," You nod with a goofy smile, your own cheeks also flushed, feeling like you might float away at any second. "I could go for a smoothie."

"I love smoothies." Jeongguk grins back at you, taking your hand, lacing your fingers. His other hand was still wrapped around your waist and hold you close.

An old question flashes across your mind as you run your hands up his chest, liking the strong, study feel of it, until you can lock your arms around his neck. "You know, I've been meaning to ask."

"Mmm?" Jeongguk hummed in acknowledgement, showing that he was listening.

"Why didn't you get me fired that first day?" You ask, aware that you are suppose to be getting smoothies but it could wait for a bit.

Jeongguk had been expecting this question for a while, and had come up with an answer a long time ago. He looks down at her with all he feels for her, a content smile on his lips.

"Because you were the first honest person I have met in years. Because you put me in my place without thinking twice. Because when you glared down at me after I changed my order for the sixth time, there was a fire in your eyes that woke something inside of me that I couldn't control. Not then and not now." He leaned down, rubbing his nose against hers, the gesture shy and intimate. "Because the fact is, you had me at 'indecisive snot'."

the end.

A/N: Tumblr and it's 250 box limit will be the death of me, I swear. I get it, I do. But come on! This very almost didn't fit, I had to edit and mush several chapters into one. Eventually it fit, but NEVER AGAIN! It was exhausting and time consuming. I'll rather split it again, like I did with two of my other fics. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed. This took me a while with all the editing. Purple hearts for all of you!! -Kayla.

#bangtan #bangtan fanfic #bts fic #jeon jungkook #bts jungkook #jeon jungkook x you #jeon jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook x oc #jungkook x you #jungkook x reader #jungkook x oc #jungkook imagine

[mandoalorian]

hello, lovely. i'm stalking you today but not on purpose. can i pretty please request general - #12 on the prompt list with din djarin? i'm feeling soft today. 🥰 thank you.

Glittering Silver [Din Djarin x Gender Neutral!Reader]

Prompt: “Come back to bed, please.”

Summary: The Mandalorian hasn’t been sleeping much lately, and tonight is the night you find out why.

Warnings: mutual pining, soft fluff/smidge of angst. [Rated T]

Reblogs appreciated because it’s not showing up in tags🤍

It was hard to tell whether or not you were overstepping. You were, after all, only ‘crew’ on the Crest. You weren’t even sure if you could call Din a friend, really. You’d like to think he considered you a friend. You helped with his kid and he occasionally showed you sentiments of gratitude. But, he wasn’t the easiest of people to read.

The past few nights, something had been preying on his mind. Something had been keeping him awake. In the darkness of the hull, you could hear the clattering off his beskar armour as he dropped it to the ground. You usually slept on the floor, with a crocheted blanket that Din purchased especially for you, from a market in the Illenium System. “My pilot chair is a lot more comfortable,” his gruff voice would tell you, every damned night. “Or my bed.”

But you were used to sleeping on the floor; and with the blanket, it truly wasn’t so bad.

Despite it being completely pitch black, you could just about make out the glittering silver that shone by your feet. He’d discarded his plates of armour into a pile and was now wearing only his dark grey sweatshirt and black pants. He was circling around you, his footsteps heavy as he paced back and forth.

“...Din?” you rasped out, rubbing your tired eyes. There was no way of telling just how late it was.

The footsteps suddenly stopped.

“You’re awake.” Din’s voice was sweet like honey, but also, unmodulated. His words came out like a statement, rather than a question, and for a fleeting moment, you thought he sounded panicked.

You didn’t exactly want to tell him how his antics had been keeping you awake these past few nights; or how you were more than aware of his newfound habit of pacing around in anxious circles by your feet.

You knew he wasn’t wearing his helmet and so, out of respect, you closed your eyes again.

“What’s wrong?” you simply asked, tredding lightly on your words. Din was never one to open up or talk about his feelings.

“Can’t sleep.” he responded.

Go figure.

“Why?”

Another pause.

“You can’t be comfortable on the floor,” he huffed, and Maker, he sounded frustrated more than anything else. “Just— come to bed with me, please.”

It’s what he’d been asking of you for weeks now.

Was that really what had been preying on his mind? Your comfort? Surely not. You’d expressed more than enough times you were fine sleeping on the floor.

It’s not that you didn’t want to sleep with Din... you actually really liked the thought of your bodies crushed up together in such a close proximity. You liked the feeling of being snug against his chest and hearing his gentle snores. Maker, you liked him. It’s just, you didn’t want to overstep your boundaries.

“There’s not a chance the two of us will fit in that metal slab you call a bed,” you chuckled softly, dodging his request just like he’d dodged yours. “Why don’t you lay here, on the floor? There’s more than enough room.”

“I can’t.” he replied sadly. His dejected tone only confused you further.

“What do you mean, you can’t?” You padded down the floor next to you with your hand and straightened out your blanket.

“It won’t help.”

Won’t help what, exactly? You stiffened slightly. “I’m not following...”

Din sighed. “It won’t help,” he snapped again, this time his voice even more gruff and angrier than you’d ever heard him before. “You were only meant to be crew. Only meant to help with repairs on the ship and take care of the kid and— that’s it! That’s all you were supposed to be!”

“Din I don’t— I don’t understand—“

“Do you not want to sleep with me, is that it? Because I’d never force you, but just— make it clear. Be clear with me.”

“Is that what this is about?” you quizzed, completely and utterly baffled.

“I— I— agh,” Din kicked the pile of beskar armour, and cursed in a language you could only assume was Mando’a. “I have feelings for you!” He shouted, his voice bouncing off the walls in the dead of night. “And I shouldn’t! I know I shouldn’t. But listen, you always look so pretty when you’re fixing up the engine and you have grease on your cheeks and oil splatters on your clothes, and your hair is sticking up in random directions. When I see you holding Grogu, my heart melts. And I feel bad for him because he loves you so much. He’ll be broken when you eventually leave. Because everyone always leaves eventually.”

Sometime during his outburst, you had stood up and tried to make your way over to him, your eyes still shut. Your arms were extended, trying your hardest to feel the way. Your stomach burst into butterflies when Din grabbed onto your hands and steadied you.

“Who says that I want to leave?” you sniffed, feeling completely and utterly full by his revelation. “I— I have feelings for you too.”

Din made a exasperated sound and dropped one of your hands. “No,” he muttered. “You haven’t even seen my face. How can you have feelings for me? You won’t even sleep with me.”

You let go off his hands and reached up, cupping his face. In the darkness, you could feel the brassiness of his stubble and the sharpness of his jaw. No, you couldn’t see his face, and you were fine with that, but there was something so special about him letting you touch you this way. It was an intimacy you’d never experienced before.

“Come back to bed, please.” you whispered.

“I don’t want to lose you.” Din croaked, trying to fight back tears.

“I’m not going anywhere,” you promised, softly shushing the bounty hunter. “Come back to bed with me. Let me hold you.”

He did, eventually, without any further protest.

Knowing he was comfortable in his own bed, you slipped in next to him. There was no need for any more fighting or arguing when you both felt the same way about each other. Your mind was racing a million miles an hour, in complete disbelief that he actually liked you back. It felt like a dream you were unable to even fathom.

It was cozy at least, your warm bodies pressed against each other just like you’d imagined. You wrapped a tired arm around Din’s torso and shuffled into his chest.

“I do have feelings for you, Din,” you admitted. “I have for a long time. I didn’t want to sleep with you because I was scared.”

“Scared of me?” Din asked.

“No,” you replied. “Scared of what it might do to us. I didn’t know where we stood.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.”

You smiled to yourself and reached down to hold his hand. “I’m just glad I know now.”

———————————————————

Permanent taglist: @paintballkid711 @supernaturalgirl @phoenixhalliwell @xoxo-callie @stardust-galaxies​ @wickedfrsgrl @goth-topic @nerdypinupcrystal @kiwi-the-first @pedroepascal l @castiel-barnes @honeymandos @rocketqueen @girl-obsessed-with-things @elena-myth @moth-guillotine @pedro-pascal-love @hayley-the-comet @pinkninja200 @maxiarapamaya @autumnleaves1991-blog @artsymaddie @harrys-stan @kennedywxlsh @cripplingmoon @cheekygeek05 @mrschiltoncat @rye-flower @theamuz @persie33 @sleepylunarwolf @martellthemandalor @pedro-pastel @steeevienicks @rrtxcmt @saphic-susperia @readsalot73 @softmedics @jade10077 @dodgerandevans @planetariumx @pascals-cat @ajeff855 @spideysimpossiblegirl @smoldjarin

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #din djarin x reader #din djarin #the mandalorian #the mandalorian x reader #pedro pascal x you #jose pedro balmaceda pascal

[spidxysense]

Back to You | 14

Summary: He broke your heart, but you’d always love him. Two souls that not even the universe could tear apart, even if you wanted it to at times.

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader x Timothee Chalamet

A/N: Yay I updated! I hope you guys like this one, I was stuck for a bit there but once I sat down and got to typing, I really finished it in one sitting. I was just planning on updating it bit by bit lol. Let me know what you guys think, Love you!!!!!!

Word count: 2,591

Prologue | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14

In a few short months of your movie premier with Timothee, you were finally able to release your double-release album, and the response was massive, to say the least. You'd been getting calls from different show hosts' upcoming awarding ceremonies. Still, you couldn't for life in you accept, all except for the Oscars, which your manager told you was a must since you'd be attending in the first place anyway and that performing at the Oscars was a big deal given that you also starred in films and shows.

You turned in bed, facing Timothee's sleeping face. He had been in town for a week now, back on a break from filming in Hungary. Then he'd be back to film in England in a couple of weeks. After your talk on your premiere night, it was to an agreement that whatever you had going on was just two people exploring and experiencing things with someone they had strong feelings for. There wasn't a need for a media circus to cover anything about you two except your movie.

You move his arm, placed it over your waist, and sit up slowly in bed, making sure not to stir Timothee. The jetlag must be shit. You stretched your arms in front of you, glancing at the clock that read 2:07 AM. You get up, grabbing Timothee's white shirt from the floor, and, putting it on, walking over to the bathroom. You looked at yourself in the mirror, touching some of the reddening parts of your neck courtesy of Timothee, and then you notice the toothbrushes… there were two. From this single thing alone, it had you catching everything about the bathroom, how there were two towels, one black, and one violet, which just so happened to be your favorite color.

You walked over to the nightstand beside the bed, putting on your skinny jeans, turning on the lamp, and noticing his wallet. Inside was a picture of you. Opening the closet doors, the ones hung up were various suits, jackets, and even dresses you've worn to events. Why didn't he just send these back? Why would he let you keep your stuff in his house?

You drag your feet downstairs, noticing small details you'd been blind to before, like the large dog bed positioned by the door despite Timothee telling you he could only ever get himself to take care of a tiny dog. You noticed the colored mugs and bowls, a deep dull navy blue color, the same as the ones in your house. Suddenly, everything feels as if it's moving too fast. You both agreed there was no relationship, and there was attraction, but why does his home feel like it's become yours as well?

You sit down, taking a few deep breaths before deciding to stand up and grab your cardigan from the coathanger, opening the front door and closing it behind you as you waited for a taxi to bring you to the more active part of the city at night.

You just couldn't deal with a relationship right now. You couldn't let your heart get broken again, so you have to find ways to distract yourself.

The car stops in front of you, driving off into the night and dropping you off by a club that Troye agreed to meet you at.

You and Timothee had an attraction, but you both agreed there was no label; ergo, there was no intimate relationship even though you both have done everything together. No boyfriend means you were free to do whatever you wanted without worrying about him. But if you were honest with yourself, this was more of you suggesting something you already knew Timothee wasn't too keen on agreeing with but would just because he thought that having something with you was better than absolutely nothing. You saw Troye waiting out by the back entrance for you when he spotted you and called you over. Almost like clockwork, every time you snuck out away from Timothee, everything in you screamed to turn back, to clear your head, and for the first time, you listened.

You motioned for Troye to go ahead and sent him a text that you'd probably just head home because you weren't feeling well. He gave you a knowing look before looking like he finally approved of your actions and sent you a quick and short 'Good." text, and headed inside.

You walked around for a while after that. Soon it was already just about 5 in the morning, and even though you wouldn't let yourself come to any conclusion as to what you even wanted out of this almost relationship with Timothee, you still found yourself back at his front door.

You took out the keys in your pocket, slowly opening the door only to find Timothee sat on the couch, his knees up to his chest as he stared off into space, either deep in thought or trying to keep himself awake… maybe even both.

When he saw you enter, a soft smile formed on his face, and for some reason, that made you smile too.

"Hey, you." He spoke softly.

You sat down quietly next to him, instantly he set his feet on the ground and reached over to embrace you in a hug, the familiar scent of Timothee that never left you that evening even more evident… It felt and smelled familiar, and right now, while your mind was a mess, familiarity was what you needed.

Timothee lifted his head, worried, "Hey, are you alright?"

You sighed, "I don't want to hurt you."

He murmured quietly into your neck as he peppered kisses, "You could never."

You pulled away, feeling guilt in your bones, "Aren't you even a little bit frustrated that we've been like this for months? That even in private, we can't even say that we're in a relationship?"

You gave you a reassuring look, "We both wanted this Y/N."

You sat up, "Except we didn't… You didn't." You corrected yourself, "You're bringing your mother to the fucking Oscars next month because I told you we couldn't be seen together at carpets for Pete's sake."

You stood up, starting to pace back and forth, "We have to coordinate outfits for the sake of not matching, and we never go out because I can't be seen with you in fear that we're going to get found out. I'm a terrible fucking person, and I don't understand how you're so okay with this."

Timothee was grinning, sleep still in his eyes, "I'm okay with it because I love you, Y/N."

You froze in your spot, "You what?"

He nodded and got up, walking over to you. The blue light of the early morning peaking through the curtain made this moment feel and look ethereal, "I said I love you, Y/N. I've known that I loved you from the moment I met you." He kissed the top of your head as he embraced you.

You shook your head, "No, no, no, you don't. I'll even list more shit I've done to you just so you understand how and why you don't love me."

Timothee chuckled, "And yet despite all this... all that's registering in my head is the fact that you've been thinking of me and only me this whole time. You've been worried about how you're hurting me because you don't want to."

And that's when you realized that Timothee was right. This whole time you've been thinking of Timothee and how much you wanted to protect him from you, but he never wanted to be protected from you because he knew that you could never hurt him. You rested your forehead against his.

"I-I need to go. I need to think."

He smiled sadly, "I'll be here when you're ready. I'll always be here Y/N until you don't want me to be here anymore."

-----------------------------------------------------------

You sat in your house, since leaving Timothee's earlier, you had been sat there lost in thought as you argued with yourself. It was true, the last thing you wanted was to hurt Timothee, but you were confused because it's like you couldn't understand your feelings. After all, a particular person still held a large part of it in his hands.

Timothee was there for you. Late night at the recording studio, whether through being there physically or even calling you or skyping you, he was always there. He was there with you when you bought all your albums from Target, and he was also the one who insisted you find another target that hasn't sold out your CDs so he could buy all of them too. Timothee was there with you when you had interviews that you almost felt like you could puke from nervousness backstage as he watched you talk about another celebrity you were getting linked to, and he was there with you to giggle about how stupid talk shows were. Timothee was always there. Whether it was dancing, kissing, or even fighting in the rain, he was always with you. He always wanted you around. Even when you rode the subway to get to a press conference of his or a promo for his upcoming movie, he always wanted you with him. He'd run with you in the rain, and he'd kiss away the sadness when you didn't want to speak with him. He was there with you when you get the sudden urge to buy all the popsicles from the nearest whole foods, and he was there with you when you got sick with the flu, which he also got from you. You'd spend afternoons walking around a far-off hill as you two put flowers in your hair despite knowing that you two probably had your busy schedules. Nothing mattered when you were with Timothee. Nothing mattered except each other. A part of you felt hurt that these memories you had kept of you and Tom were slowly being replaced by everything Timothee, but a large part of you also knew that the person you have now had no doubt that you couldn't ignore your feelings. You couldn't have to take Timothee out of your life.

Making up your mind, you got up, got dressed, and left for where you were sure you would find Tom.

He was in the middle of filming a new movie, but the second he saw you, he immediately asked to stop filming, a familiar, loving face plastered on as he walked over to you before being stopped by the director. They looked to be having a bit of a disagreement before he pointed you out, and the director looked at you in realization, patting him on the back and allowing him to jog over to you.

"Hey." You paused, your hand grasping your arm, and Tom took notice right away.

His eyebrows furrowed, "Hey, what's wrong?" He pulls you to sit by the curb as you two sat side by side, "You only do that when you're having a hard time saying something."

You gave him a look, "Well… I came here to ask you if it was alright if I try things out with Timothee."

He looked taken aback, "Oh, well, honestly, I thought you came by to sort things out between us…." He took notice of the way you looked down in guilt, "I don't think you could do anything with another guy that wouldn't upset me… but I don't really get that prerogative anymore, Y/N." He sighed, wrapping an arm around you to comfort you, "The fact is, you're trying to grow into who you've always wanted to be, and I'm trying to do that too for the sake of us and what we could be. If that means that you need or want to date someone again, I'll fully support you, but the most important thing is, does he make you happy?"

You sighed, looking out onto the filming lot, and nodded slowly, not noticing the slight upset look on Tom's face, "I catch myself sometimes smiling to myself when I think of him… But it's like I can't do anything because I don't want to let go of what we had."

Tom took a gulp, deciding that what was important right now was you, more than what he wanted, "What we had and what we were isn't important anymore Y/N. I'm working towards what we could become. What we had was co-dependency and a constant need to be in each other's presence to prove that what we had was perfect. I want us to find each other again in the future and know that no matter how far apart we are, if hopefully, we get together again, there is nobody in this world we'll love more… and that's what I'm encouraging you to do. I want to grow with you and grow for each other, and if that means you dating other people to understand yourself more, then I support you."

You looked at Tom for a second before hugging him and pecking him on the cheek, "I really needed that, Tom. Thank you."

He hugged you tighter, "Anytime. I'll always be here for you, Y/N."

----------------------------------------------------------------------

You gripped your seat in the car in pure nerves. You were on your way to the Oscars with your assistant constantly telling you about your performance and what not to mess up and things to remember, especially about reporters who wanted an interview with you. To say you were all nerves today was an understatement. You hadn't spoken to Timothee ever since you told him you needed time to think, so today would be the first time you would ever come face to face with him. You thought long and hard about everything between the two of you. Still, you think you're finally ready to actually put some time and effort into this… and if that meant doing things that would significantly make Timothee happy, then you'd do it.

Your assistant watched a live feed from the Oscars as she gave you updates on how Armie was on the carpet. Saoirse was on the carpet, talking about how she hoped to make a movie with you and various other stars. You were a few minutes away from the carpet when she spoke up again.

"Timothee has just arrived." then she looked at her phone and back at you, doing a double-take as you gave her a sheepish smile, all she could do was smile approvingly at you before going back to giving you live updates.

A few minutes later, and your heart didn't feel like it was going to slow down anytime soon as your assistant gave you a pep talk, "Y/N. You are gonna rock that carpet, you'll turn heads, and most importantly, you're gonna be the talk of the night. There is nothing that could go wrong tonight. Just take deep breaths and don't trip."

Luckily you were still coherent enough to understand what she said as you took deep breaths to calm your nerves.

"Alright, three… two… one." The door flew open as one of the large men in suits grabbed your hand and helped you out. Your dress was not providing you much flexibility to move, and for almost 15 seconds, it felt like everything was moving in slow motion as everyone was quiet. You found Timothee busy with an interview as the crowd looked from you to him, the topic on everyone's minds for the past few months. As if this were the only proof they needed, they held their cameras in their hands as they snapped pictures of you and a commotion started as they started asking for Timothee.

You think you gave them a quick, charming grin as you told them he was in an interview before walking towards the interviewer and Timothee. She was the first to notice while Timothee talked about how his mom stood him up as his Oscars date, something you arranged a week earlier and something Timothee's mom was more than happy to comply to.

The interviewer looks ecstatic as the only one and the first one on this carpet to get whatever the scoop was here, as she wasted no time when you slowly approached them, "Timothee! You said you were stood up, but you never told us that your backup would be late!"

Timothee shot her a confused look before he felt your arm slowly snake around his arm, "Sorry I'm late." You quickly whispered to him.

His face looked shocked. Almost as if a reflex, he almost pulled away from you before getting a good look at what you were wearing. His jaw looked like it would drop to the floor as he looked utterly awestruck.

The interviewer giggled nervously, already knowing her interview time was slowly coming to an end without any payoff to the two of you, "Timothee, you look to be speechless at Y/N's dress tonight." She looked at you hopefully, "Could everyone here assume this is date night?"

You smiled shyly at the lady before giving her a tiny curt nod, "I know it's a bit cliche to match outfits, but when I saw that Timothee was going to wear a harness, I just couldn't let him take all the attention for tonight, so I apologize, but I've kept this secret from him too just to make sure he doesn't do anything to take the spotlight, that's why he looks like he's just had a heart attack." you giggled.

He gave a quick, playful tilted look to you before blinking multiple times, "In my defense, I didn't even know that this was a harness... They told me this was a bib."

"Bib or not, you two look like the sexiest couple on the carpet, and I just so happen to be the luckiest interviewer tonight." The interviewer looked ecstatic as can be as she jumps up, more energetic to interview the two of you, "And well, Y/N, one look at you, and it's hard to believe anyone would still have the ability to speak. You look gorgeous." She winked at the camera, "But I can't help but notice you just confirmed this is date night… Is it safe to assume what everyone has been wondering for the past few months? That you two are dating?"

Somehow, Timothee finally snaps out of it and looks at you, a questioning look before you leaned over and spoke into the mic, "Yeah. We're together. We have been for a while now." You smiled sheepishly as you saw Timothee's face glow as he wrapped his arm around your waist, "I apologize for keeping quiet for so long, but we think it's the right time to go public now that we've decided to take things to a more serious level."

The interviewer waves a hand in the air, "As long as you two let us in on the secret, there's no problem there." She faced the camera, "You heard it here first, folks. Hollywood's newest and hottest up and coming power couple. From both Y/N and Timothee themselves, now going public with their relationship."

As you two walked away from the interviewer for more pictures, Timothee embraced you, uncaring of the cameras flashing in your faces, "Are you serious?"

You nodded slowly, "I'm ready to be with you completely, Timothee. I'm sorry I took so long."

He shook his head like a puppy, "As long as you're here with me now, Y/N, I don't care."

He pulled away at the sound of your name and his in the same sentence as the photographers asked for your attention. He quickly kisses you on the cheek as you shut your eyes and grinned, cameras going off and commotion started up at you two, the young hot couple everyone had wanted more details on.

Timothee clutched your waist tightly, almost like he was afraid that if he let go, this would all go back to how everything was before.

Before entering the venue, he pulled you to the side, "Are you sure about this? I don't want you to force yourself."

You shook your head, guiding his head to yours, "I think I'm in love with you too, Timothee. I'm all in with you." And then you kissed him.

#Timothee Chalamet #timmy #selena gomez #tom holland #tom holland fanfic #tom x reader #timothee chalamet fanfic #timothee x reader #bty #back to you #i finally updated #im so sorry i took so long #thank you for being so patient and always supporting my page #spidxysense

[lazyalani]

| M!Kawaragi Senju × [F!Reader]

| Happy Anniversary, My Love.

| angst, hurt no comfort, no happy ending, senju is insensitive

| Summary: Senju tears the last straw of your understanding when he misses an important date yet again. And you're too tired to keep on holding.

| Tokyo Revengers Masterlist

| Main Masterlist

Little do you know,

How I'm breaking while you fall asleep

Little do you know,

I'm still haunted by the memories

Being Kawaragi Senju's girlfriend isn't as fun as others think it may be. It isn't all about having protection from the gang, being treated like a Queen, having fun and romantic dates without any interuptions from other men with bad intentions, not being lonely, and getting to skip school without getting stopped by the teachers.

The first months of your relationship went really well, normal dates, hugs and kisses. But as time went by, he started getting too caught up with his own gang, as if he doesn't have other responsibilities with his girlfriend.

Little do you know

I'm trying to pick myself up piece by piece

To the point where people were starting to question whether the two of you are still together. You wanted to answer a proud 'Yes' so bad but, can you really?

How do you answer a question you yourself don't know the answer?

How can you say yes to a question when you're also confused?

Even then, you till kept your composure and held on. You can still fix this, or atleast you hoped so.

Afterall, relationships has many ups, after a fight will always be a beautiful rainbow filled with butterflies, flowers and a wedding gown.

The smile that it put on your face was painful.

Little do you know

I need a little more time

You:

Babe?

Senju?

Can you come by my condo tonight?

I have something for the both of us, I know you'll love it.

I know you're busy but it's really important.

It'll be worth your time I promise.

You stopped when your finger hit send. When had you come to this point? Where you had to say something is important just so he would come. Where you had make sure it was worth his time.

It's your and Senju's First Anniversary. You know he's busy so he probably won't have time to go out and have a date with you so you arranged something for both of you in your condo.

You really planned all this out and refused help from your friends. You wanted to do all of this effort on your own, it's a special day for Senju and you afterall. You had to do all of it quickly because Senju could come anytime but made sure all of the food were delicious.

The condo was decorated with black and silver variaties. When you look infront from the entrance you can see big gold words 'I Love You' cut and sticked perfectly to the wall.

Underneath it all, I'm held

captive by the hole inside

You waited. 7:30 pm.

You waited. 8:30 pm.

You waited. 9:30 pm.

You waited. 10:30 pm.

You cried at 11:30 pm.

You fell asleep. 12:30 pm.

You woke up, someone was shaking you. You looked up to see the only and only Kawaragi Senju, looking at you with a worried face.

"[Name], I-"

"So now you show up."

He was silent, with a guilty face.

"Finally, after waiting for hours - no, after waiting for 2 fucking weeks you finally show yourself infront of me, Kawaragi Senju."

"I, I'm sorry, I was busy with the gang, we had so much to do."

You scoffed. "That same old shitty excuse again. That same damned excused again and again."

I've been holding back,

For the fear that you might change your mind

He now frowned. "You say that like my gang isn't important. Don't call Brahman shitty and damned, [Name]."

You sneered at him. "Or what? So what if I call your gang damned?"

He glared at you. "I said don't call my gang those names."

"It's true, that damned, shitty, fucked up and stupid gang."

You found yourself back up against a wall with your boyfriend's hand on your throat.

"I fucking told you not to insult my gang like that didn't I?"

"S-senju..."

"And yet you still did."

"It hurts, let go, please."

He came to his senses, feeling your tears on his hand that was holding your throat.

His eyes widened as he pulled away. You slid down the floor holding your throat gently and panting to catch your breath hard.

You coughed a few times.

Senju flinched. "[Name], I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to, it's just, you were--"

He was cut of by you sobbing.

"I waited for so long for us to meet again. I put so much effort into making this just so our first meet up and our First Anniversary would be really special." You choked out while holding your forehead, tears rolling down on your face non-stop.

His eyes widened once more. "Anniversary?"

You laughed mockingly at the realization that he didn't even know it was your First Anniversary.

"Oh, ofcourse you didn't fucking know, afterall you were so busy with your gang." You spat out. "For your information, oh so great, Kawaragi Senju, yesterday was our First Anniversary that I prepared for. Can you not see your surroundings?"

He looked around, a guilty expression slowly covering his face once again.

"For those two weeks we haven't seen each other you barely replied to me and haven't answered any of my calls. If you replied I would always look forward to it just to see 'Yes', 'Yeah', 'I'm fine', 'I ate', 'You too'. You never even put effort into talking to me. While I spend my time thinking and worrying about you, you just do whatever you want with your gang and forget me. I knew the consequences of dating you but I didn't expect you to take it to this point. To the point that even if I want to stay positive about people questioning our relationship, I'm having so many doubts."

You searched his face for something, something that could possibly ease the rumbling emotions inside you right now. But he was looking down in shame.

"Senju, look at me. Look at me and tell me why you weren't putting effort into this relationship you asked me to be into." You almost begged him. "You told me we would fight for this relationship if ever something happens, we BOTH will. But why am I the only one fighting? Am I the only one who still wants this relationship? Am I the only one still in love?"

"I just - I'm really sorry, I'm just new to this and I don't know what to do okay? I'm busy with the gang, I have so many important things to do other than talk to you, okay? Please just understand me!" He replied, raising his voice slightly from frustration.

Senju is a type of guy that doesn't want to take every blame. He doesn't want to be the one at fault. He knows he's wrong but he can't accept getting blasted with so many words.

"I am!"

"Then why did you tell me those words like what I'm doing isn't enough for you?!"

"BECAUSE IT ISN'T!"

"[NAME], MY GANG AND I PROTECT YOU FROM GUYS WHO ARE TARGETING YOU WHENEVER I AM NOT WITH YOU EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DAY! Can't you just appreciate that?!"

"DIDN'T YOU THINK THAT IF YOU WERE WITH ME THEY WOULDN'T BE ATTACKING FROM NOWHERE?!"

"So you're saying that I should spend all my time with only you?! You're not the only person in my life! I already said I had important things to do."

"I'm saying that you should give me even just a little bit of your time, Kawaragi! I'm saying that you should hang out with me for even just a little bit! Am I not important anymore? Am I not one of your priorities?" Your voice cracked.

You sniffed and gathered your energy. "I'll give you one last chance Senju, cut all ties from your gang just for 1 week and spend that time with me. We don't have school for a week."

But Senju didn't seem to like that idea. "What? [Name], seriously? All of these just because I forgot our Anniversary?"

I'm ready to forgive you but forgetting is a harder fight

Little do you know

I need a little more time

You held in the bursting anger in your chest. "You think this is just about our Anniversary? What about our 11th and 12th Monthsary? Those only 2 dates that I planned because you were busy that you canceled? How many times have you answered any of my call? 0 times because you never answer any of them! 1 week is all that I am asking Senju. A week."

"I can't [Name], we a have a brawl--"

That was all it took for you to let go of your anger.

You raced to the wall facing the entrance and ripped out the words 'I Love You'.

Senju watched you in horror and immediately hugged you from the back, trying to stop you as you struggled in his arms.

"Let go!"

"Stop!"

"Let go, Kawaragi Senju!"

"No, please, love, stop!"

"I SAID LET GO!"

You screamed as both of you fell down the floor with him still hugging you.

You covered your face with your hands as you sobbed loudly. "I'm so fucking exhausted. I'm tired from worrying over you everyday just for you to wave me off. I'm tired of putting effort into something you never appreciate. I'm tired of this relationship. I'm so exhausted, Senju."

His tears dropped to your neck. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, please hold on, I promise, I'll do whatever you want after the next 2 weeks. Just give me time. Please, love." His voice was weak, vulnerable.

You laughed. "And I'll agree for what? For you to just ditch me again?"

I'll wait, I'll wait,

I love you like you never felt the pain

I'll wait,

He hid his face to your neck and covered your eyes with his free hand that wasn't holding you. Even if his eyes are hidden, he felt like he could still see you crying. He didn't like seeing you crying, he hated it, especially when it's him who's making you cry.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I love you." Are the only words he could mutter on your neck.

I promise you don't have to be afraid

I'll wait,

Love is here and here to stay

So lay your head on me

How did we end up like this? No, why did we end up like this? Every relationship has obstacles, but what are we going to experience in the future that the first test is this? How are we going to keep on going when were already broken? Senju tears up harder at his thoughts.

Little do you know

I know you're hurting while I'm sound asleep

I was so caught up with my responsibilities as a gang leader that I forgot my responsibilities as a boyfriend, my responsibilities to the girl I shared my burden with. To the girl who was there for me when I couldn't take the pressure I was in.

When I saw her again today, everything I felt from the first months of our relationship came back.

Little do you know

All my mistakes are slowly drowning me

Then she made me realize what I've been putting her through. What I've been doing to the girl who makes me happy.

"I'm tired of this, Senju. Please, let this pain go away."

"How?"

Little do you know

I'm trying to make it better piece by piece

"Senju, let's break up."

Senju felt his heart crack. He wanted to object, he wanted to you stay with him, but he also knew he would just put you through more pain if he's going to be selfish.

"Is that really what you want? Is that what you desire?" He asked you, afraid of what you'll answer.

Deep inside, he's hoping you'll say no.

"Yes."

Another crack.

He turned you head to face him and put his hand on your cheek. "Can I kiss you?. Just one last time."

Little do you know I,

I love you till the sun dies

You placed your hand on his hand that was on your cheek and nodded.

He gave you both your final kiss, tears running down on both of your cheeks from both of your eyes.

You looked at each other in the eyes, his and yours full of love and sadness.

The next words completely shattered his heart.

"Happy Anniversary, My Love."

Goodbye. You both thought.

Oh wait, just wait

I love you like I've never felt the pain

Just wait

I love you like I've never been afraid

Just wait

Our love is here, and here to stay

So lay your head on me

Many Relationships has it's downs, the rainbow is a lesson, the butterflies are symbols of happiness, the flowers are symbols of pain and sadness, and the wedding dress, is a wish.

'Cause little do you know I,

I love you 'till the sun dies

#tokyo revengers #tokyo rev x you #kawaragi senju x reader #senju kawaragi #angst #tokyo rev x reader #Spotify

[howmanyepsofmlseason6areleft]

You are literally a saint, I just had to write out a list of s4 eps I still needed to watch and your blog has been so helpful with that and just being able to watch in general!! Why do they make everything so confusing?? Also, what's your opinion on watching the eps as they air vs waiting and trying to watch them chronologically? I'm impatient so I'm just watching them as they air lol but I'd be curious what you think the pros/cons are since you've been watching the show longer than me (I'm a new fan, binged everything on Netflix in like a week and now trying to catch up with s4) 💕🐞

Hey dude! First off, I’m so glad you’ve found this blog helpful!!!! Welcome to the show/ fandom, hope you decide to stay a while :)

As for your questions, I’m one to watch episodes as they air, and if you don’t mind too many spoilers it usually works out fine! I would of course just be mindful on what episodes are important and whether or not you’d be willing to watch certain things without the full context (ie. the season 3 finale of the show aired before the rest of the season had finished airing, leading many people to wait to watch said finale), or skip a LOT of episodes just to watch 1 (ie. optigami, episode 13, airing before episodes 5, 9, 10, and 12, which was pretty bizarre for how big it was. There’s more drastic examples but that’s all that comes to mind rn). I’d say watch em as they air if you’re really impatient, but DEFINITELY stay in the loop on the importance of certain episodes (for example, episode 22 of this season is rumored to be the MOST important episode of the show so far), track order as you go, and, best of all, rewatch the whole season in chronological order once it’s out for optimal viewing experience!!! It doesn’t disappoint!!!

But anyhow, once again welcome to the fandom!!! You’re in for a crazy ride, to say the least… hope you enjoy it and you stick around for a long while :)

#been a while since I’ve written this much for an ask!! #I love seeing new fans! welcome!! #miraculous ladybug #ml #mlb #asks :p #mine

[isimpoveryou]

hi guysss. pls pls pls if anyone of you are from indonesia or anywhere i just want to urge you to read this article. i know if your not indo you are probably confused but this arcticle is about 3 kids probably 10 or younger who got SA by their own father and the mother is trying to report everything about what happen to their kids but the police but the police doesnt even believed it. SO PLS PLS HELP THIS BLOW OUT EVERYWHERE

english translation:

WARNING: This article contains explicit content that can trigger emotional and mental stress for readers. We recommend that you do not continue reading it. We recommend that this article be read by the Indonesian police.

if you wrote it,” he said, “what would change?”

“We rely on the police. We reported it. So what? The perpetrator is still free.”

Lydia reported the rape of her three children, all of whom were under 10 years old. The alleged perpetrators are her ex-husband, their own biological father, a state civil servant who has a position in a regional government office.

The police investigated his complaint, but the process was strongly suspected of being fraught with manipulation and conflict of interest. Only two months since he made the complaint, the police have stopped the investigation.

Not only did she not get justice, Lydia was even accused of having a vengeful motive for reporting her ex-husband. He was also attacked as a person with a mental disorder. This attack was allegedly used to delegitimize his report and any evidence he collected alone to support his quest for justice.

Lydia isn't her real name. A single mother, after a divorce, her three children came with her. They live in East Luwu, a border district in South Sulawesi, a 12-hour drive from Makassar City.

Even though she is divorced, her ex-husband still wants to be involved in co-parenting. Her ex-husband is free to pick up his three children when they come home from school and give him pocket money or toys.

The situation seemed normal until Lydia realized the hidden truth: While helping her daughter take a bath, she found several bruises on her son's thigh.

The child reasoned, the bruises were due to falling while playing catch. Lydia advised them to be careful. However, not only bruises, but the behavior of the children changed drastically, preferring to be silent, often hitting them. Lazy to eat. Frequent dizziness and vomiting.

On one night in early October 2019, while Lydia was washing the dishes, her youngest child screamed that her sister was complaining of vaginal pain. Lydia immediately approached her eldest child, hugged her from behind while rubbing her shoulders.

"Son, what did you say earlier?" said Lydia.

"No, Mamak," replied the eldest son.

He coaxed, “I love you so much. Too bad. If there is a problem, tell Mamak. I became a helper and protector ta. Don't you dare to cook with Mamak?"

"Say, son. If a child is sick, Mamak doesn't know. Does it hurt, kid?"

The eldest was silent for a long time. Then cry without tears. Lydia was shocked, panicked. The eldest, in a low voice as if choking, said: "Mamak... my father na anu pepe' . " Mamak, daddy did something to my pussy, he said.

Lydia cried, leaning on the back of the sofa, “Don't play games, kid. Don't play around."

"Yes, Mama. Yes."

He asked his two children, "Is this true, son?"

"Yes, Mama. I also had my butt crushed,” said his son.

"Me too Mamak," replied the youngest child.

She grabbed her three children, crying together. His head seemed to explode, wanting to scream. While trying to get up to go to the bathroom, to let go of tears, he fell. His legs felt bone loss.

The kids helped him inching his way. He slid over to the sofa. He raved. And began to realize when his children scolded, "Why ki, Mamak?"

He slowly released his emotions. Then examined the children, found wounds in the vagina and anus. On the night that seemed to go by slowly and long, he looked at his son sleeping. Confusion. Fatigue. He couldn't sleep until morning.

In the second week of October 2019, with her three children, Lydia went to the office of the Integrated Service Center for Women and Children Empowerment, East Luwu Social Service. In this unit, ideally, a person who complains of a violent case can get protection.

The Head of the Service Center Division, Firawati, received Lydia in a small partitioned room. Meanwhile, her three children are in the game facility in the unit. Lydia told Firawati about the chronology of her child's confession to being sexually abused by her own father. Firawati admitted that she knew the alleged perpetrator because she was "a fellow state civil servant."

Instead of prioritizing a safe room for Lydia and her three children, Firawati instead contacted the alleged perpetrator, reporting that there was a complaint regarding an alleged molestation case, so Lydia's ex-husband came to the Service Center office.

Firawati argued that the reason for bringing the alleged perpetrators together with the three children was to prove whether they were traumatized when they met their father. Firawati also argued that her actions were with Lydia's permission. "Right, fellow ASN. I want confirmation," he said.

"Do you know? All the children hunt to their father. Instead, his mother was abandoned. Even the children find it difficult to leave their father when called by their mother," said Firawati.

Lydia, when I repeated the claim of Firawati's story, listened to it and gaped.

“How could he talk like that? The first day I reported and asked for assistance to the police, but Firawati immediately called the [suspected] perpetrator when I came with the children,” said Lydia.

“After he called, he told me that I was teaching the children to slander the [suspected] perpetrator.”

"If I ever meet Firawati again, I want to see how she lies."

Not only were Lydia and her three children in a vulnerable situation when the alleged perpetrator came to them, her ex-husband immediately lashed out at Lydia for teaching her three children to complain, babbling that Lydia was incompetent to take care of the future of her three children.

The complaint provided no protection for Lydia, instead she was cornered, sent home to wait for further news.

The next day, Lydia and her three children were asked to come back to Firawati's office. From this process, the three children were psychologically examined by an officer from Puspaga, an acronym for the Family Learning Center, a work unit at the Integrated Service Center for the Empowerment of Women and Children. It was later discovered that the officer did not qualify as a child psychologist.

The examination resulted in a claim that Lydia's three children "showed no signs of trauma" and said "the relationship with the parents is quite considerate and harmonious" and that they are "in good physical and mental condition."

Firawati's act of bringing the three children together with their father--to check whether they were traumatized or not--and reinforced by a psychological examination that Lydia's children did not show any signs of trauma was later used by the East Luwu police to stop the investigation.

Handling at Polres Luwu Timur: 'I was forced by the police to sign the BAP'

Hoping to be accompanied by officers from the Integrated Service Center for the Empowerment of Women and Children, Lydia was finally alone when she reported the alleged sexual abuse case to the East Luwu Police. (Firawati from the Service Center reasoned that at that time she was in a meeting with the regional parliament, while other assistants were preparing to move their office.)

The police received Lydia's report on October 9, 2019. A female police officer took her three children to a health center for a post-mortem, without any assistance. Then, the three were questioned by uniformed investigators, without being accompanied by Lydia, legal counsel, social workers or psychologists.

Lydia was asked to sign the examination report (BAP) but was forbidden to read it first.

Five days later, the East Luwu Police notified the progress of the investigation results, reported that the report had been received and would be investigated by Aipda Kasman.

Lydia went to the police station to ask about the results of the post-mortem for her three children. At the same time, he also gave her a pair of pink panties that had blood on them on her own initiative.

On Friday, October 18, the police reported the results of the post-mortem from the Puskesmas and according to one investigator claimed “nothing was found.” On the same day, Lydia was interrogated by investigators without being accompanied by legal counsel.

“I was only asked about everyday problems. Then, the investigator said it would be continued. He will fill in the other part because he will pray Friday,” he said.

“I was asked to sign at the bottom of the report. I said I would sign later after this was continued. However, the investigators forced me. And I signed. Because it's noon and I want to go home to make food for the children."

"Well, I think now, I'm so stupid why I signed," said Lydia.

The following week, the East Luwu Police informed the development of the case; that investigators have interrogated Lydia, the alleged rapist, and three of the victim's children; have medically examined three child victims along with the results of visum et repertum; and the next plan is that the three children will be examined medically and psychologically at the South Sulawesi Police's Medical and Health Division (Biddokkes) in Makassar.

Victim's Mother's Mental Health Condition Used to Delegitimize Rape Reports

On October 28, one of Lydia's children complained of rectal pain. Lydia photographed some of the wounds. And, again on her own initiative on November 1, Lydia brought one pair of underwear with green liquid and one leggings with blood on it to the East Luwu Police.

A day later, police investigators contacted him if there would be an examination at the South Sulawesi Regional Police Biddokkes on November 6. At that time Lydia received threats from her ex-husband, the alleged rapist. The threat was that the alleged perpetrator would stop the monthly income for their three children if Lydia continued the examination process to Makassar.

Lydia with her three children, accompanied by one of her siblings, went to Bhayangkara Hospital Makassar. Here Lydia and her three children are taken to the waiting room of the mental clinic. His brother who brought him was also checked.

Inside the examination room were two doctors, an investigator, and a staff member of the East Luwu Women and Children Empowerment Center for Integrated Services.

During the examination of her three children, Lydia recorded secretly through a cellphone camera. His eldest child was seen on the lap of a Service Center staff who was sitting on a sofa. There was an investigator, a woman and a doctor in the examination room. The doctor then asked Lydia to leave the room.

During the examination of Lydia and her brother, they were asked about the family's mental health condition. Her brother was asked about Lydia's psychological condition since childhood and when she got married, did any family members have a history of mental disorders? When it was Lydia's turn, two doctors asked if they had any “disorders” before divorcing their ex-husband, as well as the condition of their household. The interview with Lydia only lasted 15 minutes.

The results of this psychiatric examination were published on November 11. Lydia is said to have "systematic delusional symptoms that suggest persistent delusional disorder."

On November 15, a physical examination letter for the three children was issued by the Forensic Biddokkes team of the South Sulawesi Police, which stated that there were no abnormalities or signs of physical violence against Lydia's three children.

The East Luwu Police then issued a letter notifying the progress of the investigation results on December 19. This letter refers to the investigation process and the trial on December 4. The letter contains the police's decision to stop the investigation process dated December 10, 2019, without any details on the consideration of termination.

"So the time span for reporting and stopping the investigation is only 63 days. This is very fast and we think it makes no sense. Moreover, this is a case of sexual violence where the victim is a child, why is the process rushed?” said Rezky Pratiwi, Head of the Division of Women, Children and Disabilities of the Makassar Legal Aid Institute.

Go to Makassar City to Get More Competent Access to Justice

At the end of December 2019, Lydia drove her own car with her three children from East Luwu to Makassar City. The journey took him 12 hours. This long and windy journey brought Lydia to the Makassar City Integrated Service Center for the Empowerment of Women and Children, where she hoped that justice would be granted to the victims.

Different from the handling in East Luwu, Lydia was given a referral to report her case to LBH Makassar. From here, LBH Makassar, through the Coalition for Legal Aid Advocacy for Sexual Violence against Children, became its legal advisor when the case was terminated by the East Luwu Police.

The Makassar City Service Center also provides psychological assistance to Lydia's three children. In his psychological report, through observation and interview methods, the three children “were not traumatized but were anxious” and all three of them consistently told and strengthened each other's stories of being sexually abused by their fathers.

Their story of being sexually assaulted, possibly more than one suspect, is consistent with what one victim told her mother when the investigation was being handled by the East Luwu Police. The victim's story is reinforced in the photos and videos that Lydia keeps, which depicts the physical abuse of her three children.

The police at the East Luwu Police and the South Sulawesi Police ignored the stories and evidence.

"At the Makassar City Service Center, child psychologists who examine children believe that sexual violence has occurred," said Rezky Pratiwi from LBH Makassar.

Pratiwi said that the East Luwu Police investigation process was "procedurally flawed" from the first post-mortem to the taking of information for each child.

Children should be accompanied by their parents as well as legal assistants, social workers or other assistants as mandated in Law 11 of 2012 concerning the Juvenile Criminal Justice System, he said.

"So the East Luwu resort police are very unprofessional," he said.

“The police are instead focusing on [Lydia's] mother, who is said to have other motives. The victim's mother was examined by a psychiatrist whose procedure was not proper. Information on children was not investigated and other witnesses were not examined to find new clues. For example, information from neighbors or people who know them,” said Pratiwi.

Polda Sulsel Supports Investigation Stopped

On December 26, 2019, LBH Makassar together with Lydia visited the South Sulawesi Regional Police and asked for a special case to stop the investigation at the East Luwu Police. Attached to the letter were photographs of the wounds to the anus and vagina of the three children.

Furthermore, on 10 and 13 February 2020, the legal team sent a letter to file a case, but there was no response. On February 19, the Head of Public Relations of the South Sulawesi Police, Kombes Pol. Ibrahim Tompo, even told the media that they had "conducted an internal case" and that the termination of the investigation was legal and according to procedure.

Then, on March 5, the South Sulawesi Police team informed LBH Makassar that a special case would be held on March 6, at 13.00, at the Polda office.

The sudden news made the legal advisors completely unprepared.

"The time is very short for preparation," said Rezky Pratiwi from LBH Makassar. "The child psychologist who accompanied the victim from the start was unable to attend because of the clash of activities."

On April 14, the results of the case study stated that the South Sulawesi Regional Police recommended that the East Luwu Resort Police continue to stop the investigation process into the sexual abuse report.

Urge Police Headquarters to Continue Investigation

On the second floor of the East Luwu Police Office, connected by a ladder, there is a room where Aipda Kasman, the investigator who handles the case of Lydia's children, works. Kasman boasts of his work, “We have done a post-mortem to forensics. Until there are results from his mother's psychiatrist."

"Can I read the copy?" ask me.

"I can't convey that because that's what we're holding," he smirks.

The so-called psychiatrist's results from the Bhayangkara Makassar Hospital, which are kept secret, are apparently considered "truth" by many people in East Luwu. That his mother is "crazy", is not a case of alleged rape that people talk about and remember. "We know about the case, but it's her crazy mother," one resident told me. "That's why the case is not continued."

During the interview session with Kasman, the investigator immediately sat nervously when I handed him the tape. He wanted to speak more openly after being allowed by his superior, East Luwu Criminal Investigation Unit Head, Iptu Eli Kendek.

“If it is stated that we are maladministration or administrative defects, that is the perception of LBH Makassar. But we still adhere to professional principles. We act according to the rules, according to the law,” he started the excuse.

"We have also clarified to all institutions that LBH Makassar has written to," he claimed.

LBH Makassar has sent a letter of complaint to a number of institutions in July 2020, including the National Police Commissioner, the Ombudsman, the Head of the South Sulawesi Women's Empowerment and Child Protection Service, the Luwu Regent, the Director of General Crimes at the National Police Headquarters Criminal Investigation Unit, and Komnas Perempuan.

To these institutions, Kasman claims, the East Luwu Police have clarified and "everything is safe."

Komnas Perempuan, in a letter of recommendation sent to Police Headquarters, Polda Sulsel, and Polres Luwu Timur, dated 22 September 2020, instead asked to resume the investigation of the criminal case.

The process, Komnas Perempuan wrote, "must fully involve parents, legal counsel, and social assistance for victims, provide safe house facilities, counseling, and other special facilities for women." Next, "The police need to coordinate with the Makassar City Women's Empowerment and Child Protection Service to facilitate these special needs."

This recommendation was precisely what the East Luwu Police did not do when handling complaints about the molestation case against Lydia's three children.

According to Rezky Pratiwi from LBH Makassar, the police and the East Luwu Service Center took sides with the alleged perpetrator. “If there is a child's testimony, it should start from there. First, dig up the supporting evidence.”

"It looks very biased. In other cases of sexual violence that we assist, the police are usually silenced. If this is the case, an administrative termination will be made.”

On one cold morning ride, Lydia sped off. Past the bend, overtook some trucks. Since the incident of sexual violence against her children, she has left her future home and preparation for old age.

He wanted to sell the house because he wanted to burn the bad memories. His children didn't want to see the house. The children refused and cried when Lydia asked to visit the house.

Lydia, gave me access to watch several videos on her cellphone that showed traces of the alleged violence of the alleged rapist. Some of the footage shows the injuries on the bodies of the children which made it difficult for me to see them through.

A few weeks after the abuse, her children complained of pain. At a puskesmas in East Luwu, Lydia asked for a referral letter to take her children to a hospital.

In the letter of reference was written a diagnosis of internal thrombosed hemorrhoids + child abuse. Damage to the anus due to forced intercourse.

Other diagnoses of abdominal and pelvic pain. Damage to the vaginal organs due to rape.

The next diagnosis is vaginitis or inflammation of the vagina and constipation or difficult bowel movements.

At the referral hospital, the children demonstrated what their father did after the doctor asked what caused the injuries to the anus and vagina.

The initial diagnosis, photo documentation and video recordings, as well as the results of the examination to the hospital were ignored by East Luwu Police investigators. The police did not take these violent findings seriously.

"If the police post-mortem results say that there were no injuries and nothing happened," said Lydia, "why did the police refuse when I wanted to give this photo and video? They said just keep it, there's no need for that."

“Then how come my child's buttocks and vagina are injured until they are swollen white like white flesh?

“Why do my children cry in pain every time they want to urinate and defecate? Why do my children say their father is a bad person and don't want to see him again now?”

“If the perpetrator is indeed innocent, why doesn't he come looking for his son, asking for clarification from the children?

"If people say this is slander, why are the children slandering their father like that?"

“If that question is not answered, will the police help find the answer?

No, right.*

#spread awareness #pls reblog #journal spread #spread this #important #justice #indonesia

[razberryyum]

TGCF donghua Special Episode Thoughts (SPOILERS for episode & novel!)

Favorite moment:

Of COURSE that amazing ending sequence, which is the mirror of Dianxia's backstory at the end of the first episode, except this time from Hua Cheng's point of view. Speaking of, holy mother of YUM, dear gods, Hua Cheng:

Look at this "hideous" man. I am DROOLING.

Funny thing is, I didn't even know his appearance was supposed to be a secret, that we technically hadn't seen his face yet all this time. I remember we had a super quick glimpse of him in the Banyue pit and I thought that was his reveal, that that'll be all we'll get for now and I was fine with that...that is, until this ending sequence happened and we actually see him in his entirety. My eyes will forever never be the same. What was I even thinking??? The flashes in the pit were absolutely inferior to the real thing. No comparison. He is so gorgeous; I can't WAIT for Xie Lian to meet him next season.

Second favorite moment:

What I love about this scene is first of all it features some of my favorite lines from the novel, "If you don't know what to live for, then just live for me. If you don't know the meaning of life, then take me as the meaning your life." Even though Dianxia was playing it up for dramatic effect, I loved how he crawled towards San Lang and then uttered the lines with such conviction. I LOVED the way the music reached a cresendo during his words--hell, I love the music in this entire episode, this entire show, period. I also love how bittersweet this scene is: here Dianxia is so embarrassed by his own words that he even laughs about them, dismisses them, not know just how much of an effect they had on the person he said them to, how they really did serve to motivate that person to live on, to exist, utterly for him. Not knowing at all that that person he said what he now thinks were silly words to is right in front of him. The irony!

I'm still making my way through the book so I haven't gotten to the part where all is revealed to Xie Lian yet, but I can only imagine how shocking and emotional this particular revelation would be. It'll probably be ten years before we get to see all that in the donghua, if we ever do, but I'm gonna keep on crossing my fingers and hoping.

"I swear, whether in Heaven or or on Earth, you cannot find someone more sincere than me". The subs left out the Heaven or Earth part but it's still such a good line. Love also how San Lang precedes that by trying to reach out to touch Dianxia but is like too afraid to. The donghua really captured his feelings of...I guess I'd call it timid inferiority...so well.

I have a strong suspicion what that ring is (irl, I've seen companies advertising turning ashes into diamonds as a keepsake of your loved ones...never tried it so I don't know if it's the real deal or some kind of scam) and I cannot wait to get to that revelation as well. Putting aside the potential significance of this momento, the fact that Hua Cheng left Dianxia a ring to wear around his neck is already a beautiful gesture on its own.

I already miss seeing how San Lang looks adoringly at Xie Lian. In fact, I think I'm going to miss San Lang for quite a while since next season I think we'll be mostly spending time with Hua Cheng. Not complaining at all since Hua Cheng will no doubt look at Dianxia just as adoringly, but I will miss this cute guy.

Also already missing the cuteness that is Dianxia. I love all his expressions...the way he said "San Lang" just made my heart explode. How can he be this adorable??? Really, bravo to Jiang Guangtao-laoshi, his voice actor, for such an endearing voice performance. I actually started listening to the Qiang Jin Jiu audio drama because I've become a fan. Imagine Xie Lian being super seductive all the time. That's the ear candy I'm enjoying now, even though I only understand like less than half of the plot due to my shoddy Chinese comprehension.

Proud of how San Lang didn't just lose it when Dianxia cradled his face like that. This man really has unbelievable self control.

I loved that they were chatting in bed like an old married couple. I'm sure this is a glimpse into their future married life. 😁

Besides SanLian, I know Banyue was in this episode as well, I still think she's adorable and love her voice, and I'm glad she gets to enjoy a torture-free life now (I am assuming she does).

I'm glad we got this special episode to really close out the season, but I'm still kinda confused as to why we didn't get it at the actual end of the season but rather as an odd stand alone episode like this. Obviously it picked up right where the 11th episode left off, so it would've slotted in perfectly well. I was hoping the reason they held on to it was because they were going to attach a teaser PV for the next season, but alas that wasn't the case. I wonder if they just needed more time to finish the episode. I still don't quite understand how the Chinese donghua industry works: for something seemingly as popular as TGCF, you would think they'd have good enough budget and resources to finish episodes in time and to make more than just 12 episodes. There are other donghua shows I've seen on Bilibili that have blown way past 12 episodes, so I don't understand why they have to stubbornly stick to a dozen only for something like TGCF. Or is it a danmei thing, I wonder. They just don't want to devote the time and resources to danmei shows beyond just 12 episodes? So weird. Again, VERY GRATEFUL we're getting a second season. SINCERELY praying that we get many more seasons after so that eventually they'll finish out the book. God I hope I finish reading before the donghua team finishes putting out the show.

And that brings me to: Current Reading Progress...chapter 160. Look, I'm gonna be honest, I'm just not a fan of the whole jinx demon concept or the Brocade Immortal. I know all mysteries of the week lead back to the gods and their backstory, but as CONCEPTS, I was just NOT into them so I constantly got distracted. I know MXTX-laoshi was under a LOT of pressure from both censorship and just ridiculous deadlines (I was told she had to produce a chapter a day, which is INSANE), so I feel like a douchebag for even thinking anything negative about the book...not to mention I'm only on Book 3 still so maybe all of this will be wrapped up nicely at the end. But for now, yeah, those two as ideas are a bit underwhelming and almost silly (especially the Brocade Immortal) and maybe I don't need the backstory of ALL the gods. Anyway, before anyone yells at me, there's always a chance I might change my mind about all this by the end...which I hope to get to soon. Didn't finish the book in time for this special episode which was my goal, so readjusting the goalpost back a little further...hopefully just a tad...like a few weeks, because I DO want to get to the unrelenting pain soon so that I can get through the suffering and finally to the HuaLian happily ever after ending.

#Tian Guan Ci Fu #Heaven Official's Blessing #HuaLian #SanLian #TGCF donghua