#idc idc ill live. so long as there as hope. as there are happy moments. as long as i can anticipate a moment of tranquility

[angeldiaries777]

life update maybe idek i just vent and its very personal and a little boring

im forgiving my family for my own sanity and well being. even if we're not as close as we used to be which is normal cuz were all getting older i hope that we can just stay civil and not toxic. im starting fresh. besides all of the mental trauama lmaoo. what im saying is im gonna try to create different thought patterns for myself and just maybe get on anxiety medication so i don't hurt others or myself. yeah. idc. but im tired of seeing people as my enemies. while i was a victim of abuse for a long time i cant deny it i just can't stay a victim anymore. sorry. i want to control my outcome. i don't think i will ever be good with certain relatives but i want to atleast be chill with my parents. yknow. and its not like those relatives are awful people. they're just average grown adults who didn't know how to speak to me when i was a child. nothing wrong with that. there were also good moments. i don't want to have such a negative view of my childhood because honestly it was pretty amazing compared to most i just also was scared of being happy because i thought id be stupid if i did things to help me cope better with my mental illnesses. im not. finally been staying consistent with brushing my teeth for thr first time in 2 years and eating more. not like a ton cuz its difficult for me after a restrictive ed however progress is progress. i just really want to make the last few months and next year really count. knowing that love from a distance is possible and even healthy. goodbyes are normal and ill figure it out with time. for once in my life i feel as if the world isn't on fire anymore and that i might be okay. still mentally ill. just learning that its okay to heal at ur own pace. and just cuz u thought something negative doesn't erase all of the good that you have done recently. honestly my goals now are to gain more mental clarity and to learn more about life and this world. i want to be ready for adulthood. time is going to pass regardless might aswell try and be present. and i know what i've been through. and no one else needs to validate me. and confidence. gonna work on my confidence issues aswell. not regarding my looks. physically im literally the girl that 7 year old me wished she looked like and while that makes me beyond happy i want to be confident in my beauty and for who i am as i learn who i am. and what i actually believe in. where my morals stand and such. basically ive i don't want to say matured because thats true but ive felt that way before i think i have just actually realized that theres an entire world out there outside of my anxiety brain and that i am fully capable of love and living a healthy happy life. no matter how difficult it was and will continue to be considering im human i know there will be other tough times. and ive already overcome so much at such a young age i just feel ready almost for whatever is next. mental illness and my relationship with it oh my god that could have its own post entirely i think i will stop typing tonight because my fingers hurt but i want to write about how healing with mental ilness feels especially with brain fog omg that would be super interesting and

[britneyshakespeare]

when i become super successful and famous for, i dont know, some reason, i’m a great person so it has to happen eventually, i want my autobiography to be titled The Little Bitch Who Could

#like the little engine that could #but im a little bitch #also i would love to be able to read that right now to see how im gonna get through these next several fucking road blocks #that i have to get through #ohohohoohoh im not lookin forward to that at ALL but a bitch must do what a bitch must do #this little bitch in fact can #i dont know where all this optimism is coming from i was crying about how i completely ruined the rest of my life an hour ago #and maybe i .. DID in fact do some permanent damage i dont know yet im still young #idc idc ill live. so long as there as hope. as there are happy moments. as long as i can anticipate a moment of tranquility #as i listen to soft music or just eat a really good piece of chocolate or something #or i have hope on a budding friendship/relationship w someone #or just meeting someone's very nice dog #i have somethin to hang on for #even if i do in fact suffer a lot... i already have. a lot. i can do it again mother fucker #and whether or not i live slow and steady or if i die at 27. my life will not be defined by how it ends #none of the trials i will face in the future will ever take away from me the little moments where i felt okay to be alive #nothing. absolutely NOTHING can do that #tales from diana #text post #self love #positivity

[achillesunly]

SKK FIC REC TOIME BITCHES

ok so this one, this one here, is already becoming very popular (as it should) and honestly it lives up at its name. but i wanted to talk about it the moment i started reading it. So here we go.

Buckle your seatbelts, tighten ur ponytail and change for the highest heels u got, here w e  g o.

One of the very best stories i ve ever read, regardless of it being actual paper books or fics. Just a piece of art. I swear to god it made me feel things. Which writing not often do. Im quite complicated about these sort of things. 

But yeah this one feels right.

I just fucking wish i could forget it to rediscover it like fr tho. So good. 

Quick summary for y’all sore asses: ennemies to friends to lovers to ennemies to lovers to- u get it. Musicians. Closeness. Fun. ANGST. (good angst) (feels good when it hurts this bad *bdsm free tho*) Duo. parting. talent. a spark of SOMETHING ELSE; IS IT MAGICAL WRITING? found family -families- bigggg plot twist, not really plot twist but your mouth will hang open and ur heart will drop as well. gay. cause we here 4 that. poetic. i learned so much about musical industry so wow author how do you know so much? are u secretly a star?  i want to hear the songs with their voices like- whaaat??? I WANT TO HEAR ONE IN PARTICULAR AND YALL KNOW WHICH IM TALKIN AB- yeah that is one of them fics that will forever beat in your ass- heart- in your heart.

the author i wish they live a happy and blissful life, hoping nothing but the best for them (writing more skk masterpieces of this kind too).

Honestly dazai feels so human but not in a ooc way, actually he’s the most accurate i’ve seen in a long time, and the writing is so good ill punch myself in the face, theyre all (but mostly skk duh) so very real you feel like they’re actual stars and i cant even. 

its so rare

fuck me sideway with a fan wtf

Now, i’d like to add a few comments i saved on my phone while reading and ugly crying coz yeah , it’s like that. So (??) (Spoilers warning?) (but its so vague without context?) (do what you want idc) (u should already be readin it tho)

So, yeah :)  :

-wanting to die the entierty of chapter 6 litteral horror get me out of this

-fuck there’s still too many chapter for it all to end on this good note noo NAUUUUR

-OF FUCKING COIURSE ITS A SAXOPHONE YOU AND YOUR SICK GAMES

- jesus the jealousy on this man i cant

-i thought it was gonna be very very fun with the first lill bit of chapter one. Turns out the whole context is a mess 

-no it starts to get better its too soon no its gonna fall no stop hey-

-my mental sanitiy is now attached to this piece of writing and i will go down with it

-HES BEEN SLEEPING ON THE SAME COUCH he used to hbeuehheueehNO

-them vibes on tour bro

-BRO YALL SLEEPING WITH UR HOMIE LIKE THAT WAHT

-no but srsl wht them feels

-fuck off they re saying the same shit to their diciples

-BAHAHAHAH CHUUYA MY HEARTEU NO I CANT COMMENT ON PORT MAFIA RECORDS LEGAL DISPUTES BUT- ARE YOU KIDDIN ME THATS THE BEST THING EVER I CANT I CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANT

-jesus atsushi

-CHUUYAHAH

-wot

-o h my go d

-oh M Y G OD

-HE- GOD NO

-BABY WHAT

-jesus fuck’s sake im going to hang myself high and short

-IN THE MIDDLE OF HAHAHAHH

-HELL YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH BABY

-i m smiling like a dumb teenager in love and im pretty sure my driver thinks i m possessed

 so yeah, go read it totally worth the time and the feels

TW: you’re going to feel human

#soukoku #chuuya #chuuya nakahara #dazai #dazai osamu #dazai x chuuya #SOUKOKU WOOOOOW im crying in the corner skk #skk #bungou stray dogs #bsd #music au #musicians au #ennemies to lovers #ennemies to friends to lovers #love is not dead #one hell of a ride #skk fic #soukoku fic #skk ff #skk best fic #skk best ff ever

[mxgilray]

Loki Season 1 Thoughts

Overall, I really liked this series. It has some issues without question, but I sincerely don't think it's the dumpster fire so many viewers on this site treat it as. Did it go how I expected? Not at all? Did I enjoy the heck out of it and look forward to it every Wednesday? Hell yeah!

Loki's Good Guy Personality

A big complaint many have had with it is how much Loki's demeanor has changed and how his emotional growth feels rushed or his personality is ooc. Truth is, he saw his entire future, saw what his angry, power hungry, I-work-alone persona would get him in the end, and it snapped him back to reality. He has always been shown to be quite emotional and craving attention and lacking in self assurance, it's just in the past movies he's masked it with violence and fake narcissism, and he's always been a secondary character so his perspective is rarely shown. But if you really pay attention it's obvious he isn't truly villainous; we all know that, it's largely why he has such a huge fan base.

Right after meeting Mobius, Loki got an infodump of his future, saw his parents both die, found out that free will means jack shit, and learned he's absolutely powerless in this realm. On top of that, this is 2012 Loki, fresh off of being under Thanos' control, suddenly being shown that the guy who controlled him is going to end up killing him. Frankly,, I think it all broke Loki. He was too shook up by it all and by the sheer helplessness he found himself in at the TVA that he let all his barriers down momentarily. Just long enough for him to open up to Mobius about his motivation and his lack of self confidence. And you know what I bet? Loki felt relieved after talking to Mobius. A weight was lifted, because he bore his heart to someone and wasn't rejected or laughed at or treated like a psycho. And after letting his walls down fully, Loki didn't feel the need to put all of them back up. He stayed guarded around other people, but he didn't need to pretend around Mobius. Mobius has seen under the mask, so Loki doesn't feel pressure to perform as an all knowing, all powerful God around Mobius. That freedom is life changing.

People who gravitate towards broken, pseudo-villain characters do so because we relate to their internal conflict, their mental illness, their need to fake it around everyone close to them. Their turmoil and depression and self destructive behavior are familiar and we see ourselves reflected in their actions. Now, when a person really truly let's their guard down, drops all their layers of facade, and embraces themself, they tend to change demeanor and even personality pretty drastically. It's jarring in real life, so of course when it happens to a fictional character who you usually relate to it is going to be jarring, maybe even more so because it feels like a change you yourself would never go through. I know this sounds bad and people might get at me for it, but...

I believe the issue here is that a large part of Loki's fan base doesn't want him to get better. They don't want him to move past his mental illness, to learn how to cope with anger and disappointment in healthier ways, to be happy. They like his damaged persona, they like the internal conflict. Maybe it's because they're still at that low place themself and feel like a relatable character is getting taken away from them, maybe it's because they don't understand how much being at peace with yourself can alter a person and to them it feels like he's been changed too much. To those of us mostly on the up and up from battling depression and mental illness, it's comforting to see Loki getting a chance to be genuinely happy and accepting of himself.

Sylki and Lokius

First things first, I'm not anti anything. Ship what you want, idc. Personally, I do not see the Sylki dynamic as romantic, but I get why people read it that way. I thought the series did a good job of showing unrequited love, namely Loki falling for Sylvie and Sylvie feeling zero romance towards him. This was aware of his attraction and in the end used it as a distraction so she could get the upper hand. The show played up the potential romance because we are viewing things from Loki's perspective and he's become smitten as a kitten. I do think in the long run they'll have a more sibling-like dynamic, one Loki realizes that you can feel extreme love and care for a person without it being romantic. I enjoyed how the show explored their relationship, though I do wish they hadn't had every character under the sun mention their moment on Lamentis-1 like it was some big deal to bond with someone you're about to die with.

I'm bitter towards the development of Lokius. It had a strong start in the beginning, and in ep 5 had some potential reignited, but then they had Mobius not know who Loki is at the end. I'm still hoping they're playing the long game with this ship and that it'll come to fruition partway through season 2. The chemistry is there, and Mobius knows Loki very intimately and isn't put off by his past. Loki also feels much more at ease around Mobius than he does around Sylvie. It's the comfort of a deep loving bond with Mobius verses the nervousness of a new crush that he feels for Sylvie.

I don't think Loki is quite aware of his feelings for Mobius, simply because it's based in friendship and mutual respect and isn't a hot and heavy lust. Plus, as soon as he was away from Mobius he was thrown into a near death experience with Sylvie and developed a surface crush during their heart to heart. Since Loki's still figuring out what genuine feelings are beyond anger and sadness, he sees the simplistic crush he has on Sylvie as love and the intimate bond he's been forming with Mobius as friendship. He doesn't understand his own feelings yet, but I think he'll figure it out next season. I mean, he was probably already rethinking his feelings for her after she kissed and betrayed him, mentally kicking himself for expecting her to not pull a Loki betrayal like he would've in the past.

The Time Variance Authority

I really like the concept of the TVA, the structure of it, the methods they use, the deeply fucked way they recruit employees, the cult like motto, shady Miss Minutes who is definitely playing her own long game, and the blind acceptance TVA agents have of the Time Keepers' will. It's all very well done... until your dig into the core, aka He Who Remains. They built up the idea that the Time Keepers created the TVA to prevent a multiverse war and that they created agents to enforce their will. Then the creating agents turned out to be fake, the Time Keepers were fake, I expected the reason for the TVA's existence to be fake to. It felt too simple to have it genuinely exist just to keep the multiverse in check. Why the anonymity, unless it's to keep from having agents target and prune versions of himself which.. songs like a decent solution. HWR made it sound as though the multiverse war was just a bunch of versions of himself screwing shit up, so why isn't the TVA's focus on eradicating every other variant of this guy? Sounds a lot easier and nicer than fucking with the free will of every other living being. So either Marvel made a bad call when choosing what HWR's motive was for creating the TVA, or he was lying about it all to cover up something sinister.

Overall Storyline

I'm fairly happy with the plot as a whole. There were some pacing issues and I think a few missed chances for deeper conversations between various characters. While I enjoyed the Loki variants, I honestly would've been happier seeing Tom playing most the variants (except Kid Loki and Classic Loki since they are clearly different age ranges). If there is supposed to be one sacred timeline, it seems off to me that Lokis would be allowed to vary so extremely without it causing a nexus event(an alligator, whose nexus wasn't that he's an animal who obviously can't do any magic much less command Thanos' army, but that he ate someone's cat) and not just in appearance but in life path (ie boastful Loki collected all the infinity stones but it wasn't till he had 6 that he caused a nexus event even though him gaining control of the Soul, Power, and Time stones should've each caused nexus events since on the sacred timeline he never interacts with those 3 and taking any one of them would've fucked up a lot of other timeline parts)

I love the display of Lokis raw power, and 2012 Loki coming to the realization that he's way more powerful than he ever thought. And it wasn't just Classic Loki who spent thousands of years alone honing his skills, 2012 Loki reversed time on a goddamn falling building! I also liked the small magic, the fireworks, the tablecloth blanket, Loki yanking Sylvie away from HWR with just magic.

As someone who is both bisexual and genderfluid, I would've really loved more concrete representation. The comment about there never being another female Loki hit me in the gut; it undermined the Easter egg "Sex: Fluid" on Loki's TVA file. With how big a deal Sylvie being female was made out to be throughout the season, I expected her gender to play a key role in taking down the head of the TVA, like it was foretold that only a female Loki could end it all or some shit.

I don't mind the idea of Loki finding love in a straight passing relationship. I don't even mind the selfcest all that much. It just feels so obvious to me that Sylvie is written as not having any romantic inclination towards Loki, while Mobius is clearly written as falling in love with someone he shouldn't and trying to maintain an heir of professionalism to keep from wrecking his bond with Loki. I really really hope they come through on season 2 and give Lokius the canon relationship and proper representation they deserve.

Mmkay I thinks that's all the thoughts I've got right now. If you've been feeling cheated or clowned by how things went this season, maybe my perspective of things can help ease your pain.

#loki spoilers #loki series #loki #mobius m mobius #sylvie laufeydottir #lokius #sylki #tva loki #time variance authority #marvel #mcu

[blxetsi]

Hello! I love your blog and writing so much! May I please request modern au dating hcs for Mikasa?

tysm for requesting ilysm 🙈💥

i also went a bit overboard i hope thats okay !!

modern mikasa ackerman dating headcanons

lowercase intended !

college!mikasa ackerman x gn!reader

- eren finds out abt her crush on you. idc idc

- mf may be dense sometimes but he isnt stupid, he KNOWS what mikasa acts like when shes in the presence of her crush,, he would know bc he was one ;)

- anyways, maybe your like, going up to ask mikasa for her notes from last class, or just chatting with them to be friendly

- either way mikasa goes from 😳 to 😐 real quick

- shes very quiet which youre used to so you dont really think too long abt her lack of communication. its literally just you and eren talking at this point

- after you leave to,,, idk sit under a tree ?? erens immediately turning to mikasa being like "okay tell me everything"

- she denies the crush on u 😔💔

- but then eren tells armin.

- and eren has a big mouth so who knows who else he told ??

- so finally, after beating up eren for spilling the beans she tells her two closest friends EVERYTHING

- like from how nice your hair smells to how pretty she finds your eyes. how she loves your sense of style. she just likes everything about you

- erens like "i mean yeah theyre rlly cute but like,,, what do you like about them that isnt physical 😐"

- mikasa starts blushing HARD. and slowly goes to her bedroom in their shared apartment, before slinking back out holding a crinkly folded piece of paper.

- its something you wrote and it says "thanks for studying with me mikasa !! let me treat you to boba as a thanks. youre so sweet, ill see you next class babie"

- erens looking at the note like 😐 mf is this it ??

- armins flipping it back and forth and reading it over and over again

- mikasa just says "theyre kind to everyone. and theyre funny. i just like them a lot."

- erens like 🙄 k but armins all for it

- then they start coming up with a plan to get you to like mikasa back (even though mikasa doesnt want that)

- erens an asshole and says "mikasa i love you and you will always be my number one, HOWEVER. they might just see you as a friend, OR WORSE. an aquaintance. we gotta make u so cool that youre irresistable"

- now mikasa is a bit worried

- HOWEVER. what none of those idiots know is that YOU have had a fat crush on mikasa since you asked her for a pencil at the beginning of the semester 😍 she stared at u like 😐✏️ and u were like "omg thanks 😊" w a little blush on ur cheeks bc mikasa's hot

- i mean,, if you didnt like mikasa WHY would you have invited her out for boba ?? one, who doesnt like boba ?? and two,, doesnt that count as a date ? u didnt know but u just wanted to like ✨subtly✨ shoot your shot

- but that was almost a month ago and she hasnt said yes. so you assume she didnt wanna go

- a few days go by after mikasa tells her friends all about her crush. and like,,, they do nothing ?? what happened to the big plan of making mikasa seem like the coolest person around ?

- it turns out eren doesnt know enough about you to know what you like. and ur dumbass friends aint help either.

- so one day he finds you and mikasa coming out of your shared class, your talking about something and mikasa is just nodding with a blush on her cheeks.

- he runs up to both of you before saying "hey just to let you know mikasa has a big crush on you. and she'd love to go get boba with you 😁👍"

- mikasa gets so red in the face and starts smacking him with her binder. you couldnt stop it even if you tried

- after literally YELLING at them for their attention you just turn to mikasa like "please get boba with me 🥺" and she cant resist

- and then the rest is history 😌✨

- after the boba date you learned so much about her and vice versa. you guys were like,, closer than ever. always going to her apartment or her coming to your dorm

- you guys would have sleepovers very frequently. nothing ever happens but you two like being so close with each other

- and you guys do a lot together when you arent busy with school or work or friends

- mikasa takes you to cool museums and art galleries

- you take her to cool shops downtown and parks

- its so fun

- but you cant help but wonder if youre dating or not ?? like do you have the right to call mikasa your gf ?? you guys havent kissed on the lips but she always kisses your head when you cuddle, and you always take each other out on dates

- on the day you finally bring it up during one of your sleepovers. shes on her back and youre almost on top of her with your arms around her shoulders and your face smushed into her chest

- u just kinda mumble "are you my girlfriend ?"

- and its SILENT.

- u start freaking out bc "omg she doesnt like me 😁👍 im gonna cry"

- until she just quietly says. "yes."

- OFNWIDNKWSMWKKWKALSMQLSME

- ur gonna marry this girl 😐

- her love language ?? definitely acts of service. idc idc.

- when u sleep over shes making you tea without u asking. (u said u liked lavender tea ONCE and this bith got a whole container 😭😭)

- when you have movie nights with her, eren, and armin she always chooses a movie you like ("no we arent watching the florida project again armin cried last time" "yeah but y/n loves it so" "this feels like oppression mikasa" "okay and ?")

- is also very protective. she hears mfs in the halls talking shit about you ?? shes shutting them up with her glare

- also u know how isayama made her goth in his like, highschool thingy ?? yeah 😍

- #gothmikasasupremacy

- she makes her eyeliner and shadow messy on purpose.

- you love just laying her down on her bed and straddling her, just leaning over and doing her makeup for her (jules and anna tease 🙈✨)

- sometimes you guys go to thrift stores and pick out outfits for each other

- one time you found this GORGEOUS floral sundress and she physically shivered from the thought of wearing

- tried it on and looked SO BEAUTIFUL, but it wasnt her style 😐

- also doesnt tell her parents about you ?? not bc shes embarassed or anything but just because she knows her dad is gonna be like "who are they ? what are they like ? where do they live ? whats their major ? where are they from ? whats their zodiac sign ?"

- he doesnt do it to play the "overprotective dad" role but because hes genuinely curious and excited

- she brings you home for the first time and youre so surprised because this tall blond man is her FATHER ?? she looks so much like her mom though its not even funny

- for dinner her mom and dad made traditional japanese food 😭😭 it was so good omfg

- also this has nothing to do with dating headcanons but mikasa used to live off of lunchables as a kid. was literally addicted to the rubber like ham 😍

- her mom is so sweet, and she shows you all of the stuff she's embroidered all these years

- her dad is so extroverted, he loves telling dad jokes. you find them HILARIOUS but mikasa sits there like 😐👍

- he DEMANDS you guys play scrabble. he says it help him figure out who you are as a person. now youre scared 😁👍

- anyways

- you love giving her little kisses on her lips because one, you get some of her moisturizing lip gloss on your lips and two, she blushes SO HARD

- one time you two were on a date and you ran into her ex. whos literally so scary

- her name is annie and shes blonde and muscular and rlly hot but has that same blank stare as mikasa

- you feel kinda weird bc how did she go from being with ANNIE to you ??

- you ask her abt it and shes like "oh yeah we dated in our last year of high school. im much happier with you" and now youre feeling all giggly and happy bc mikasa doesnt lie 😭😭

- u roll around on her bed with your cheeks squished together to hide your blush bc you feel so good that she said that

- she just rolls her eyes before getting on top of you and taking your hands away from your face

- she gives u kisses all over before putting the final one on your lips. its such a soft and sweet moment with just the two of you, you cant help but confirm what youve already thought:

youre gonna marry her one day.

a/n

i REAAALLLLYYYY enjoyed making this oml. i hope u all enjoyed this !! remember: requests r open for anything aot OR u can give me ideas for other fandoms to write for

kk goodbye friends 🤩🤩🤩

#attack on titan headcanons #attack on titan #attack on titan x reader #mikasa ackerman #mikasa ackerman x reader #eren jaeger #eren yeager #armin arlert #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman #shingeki no kyojin #shingeki no kyoujin imagine

[bow-woahh]

She-Ra season 5 thoughts

A chaotic summary of my feelings/ reactions of each episode! Spoilers. Obviously. 

Episode 1 — Horde Prime

- First of...Adora stop throwing yourself into battle challenge - "You're not She-Ra anymore" — TELL HER SIS - The way Catra was so smug but Glimmer was not having any of it "You're just as alone as I am" if that ain't the truth idk what is - Catra wanting the climb up the ranks? Sis I don't think so let's see how long that lasts - The DINNER pissed me the fuck OFF - Oh yeah here's my obligatory SW FUCK OFF CHALLENGE - Micah, King, glare at her!! Yes!! - The way Scorpia said "Catra thought my singing was annoying" honey - That clone was SO annoying stfu about Prime being omniscient and omnipresent and shit like ugH idC - Bow and Adora are the BROTP - Scorpia stinging Adora to keep her safe - and that's on friendship - The way Prime INSTANTLY called Catra out "Adora means something to you" listen I hate the gay but damn he's smart. He saw right through her act. - "Adora chose her side and I chose mine" that doesn't mean you don't still care Catraaa - Also that was REALLL quick lmaoo the way five seconds she was like "imma climb up the ranks" then in about two secs HP was like "sis I have no use for you" - "What are you going to do to me?" IM CRYING - Adora and those weird flashback PTSD things -- are u okay sis?? - This was the first episode and I already want to cry so....wow

Episode 2 — Launch

- Adora omg she's so fatigued girl S L E E P - Bow getting pissed at everyone for not letting her rest...what a king - Catra disobeying HP and talking back to that clone but then HP took its form...fuck man that shit scary - STOP CALLING HER  LITTLE SISTER CHALLENGE JESUS FUCK - Everyone hates Entrapta wow ouch - Literally Entrapta being horny over robots is hilarious lmaoo - Mermista is a great leader and they worked so well together ahhh! I'm loving Scorpia and Frosta's friendship - Entrapta got the signal!! I'm proud -  Adora stop following holograms and illusions challenge -  Adora being all like "I don't know my destiny anymore but I know I need to save my friend." LIKE YES HONEY -  Glimmer is sO volatile like honey,, did you need to break HP's crystal ball thingy?? DID U?? -  also she knows her dad is alive now and that H U R T S ++ I bet she doesn't know the sword is broken so fuckkl -  Micah as She-Ra?? something I never knew I needed -  SW not being in this episode at all? love that for us - "I reinstate my horray" I LOVE YOU SCORPIA - "Can you stay?" MY FUCKING HEART GLITRA FRIENDSHIP HERE WE COME

Every episode I just feel immense f E AR

Episode 3 — Corridors

- THIS STARTS W BABY CATRA AND ADORA?? NOELLE WHY ARE TRYNA KILL US?? - Catra and Glimmer talking about sleepovers and Adora...damn my heart - Adora and her stupid ponytail 💀 - "I'll never say sorry!" - THE WAY YOUNG CATRA WAS SO JEALOUS EYE— - "There's no one in the entire universe who cares about me." - "Im sorry! For everything." IM SO UPSET WTF -  CATRA IS FUCKED BUT SHE SAVED GLIMMER -  HP GTFO CHALLENGE -  I'm so proud of my baby tho wow... -  What the fuck we gone do now? -  so much happened in this episode so this is a lot shorter because my brain is numb. Catra is gonna get brainwashed?? isn't she?? -  "I want to do that one good thing in my life." IM CRYING Y'ALL

Episode 4 —Stranded

- Adora is like "Catra, Catra?? saved you?? wtaf?” Lmaoo - Bow and Glimmer fighting is hurting my HEART - KYLE HAS A CRUSH ON ROGELIO?? SCORPIA DONE EXPOSED IT AHHH - Swifty tryna contact Adora?? kinda cute - him impersonating everyone was onbrand and kinda funny ngl - The way Adora is like "it's complicated" lmaoo girl everything is w you - I live the star siblings omg yeS - "I have to save someone. Someone I—" omFG ADORA - Adora is S T R O N K - she GLOWED OMFG SHE RA?? IS THAT U?? - BOW AND GLIMMER BEING OKAY?? MAYBE - Etherians really are wilding out here - YESSS THEY JOINING THE REBELLION - "Maybe we'll never be friends like we used to be."  Glimmer...I love her sm - "I can't just leave her there. I have to try." Adora actually cares so much about her!! and I love Glimmer being supportive wow we love a queen! - THE BEST FRIEND SQUAD IS BACK TOGETHER!! LETS GOO - "She-Ra is back." Swift Wind is annoying but thank you. thank you for saying that horse.

I literally threw my hoodie across the room and forgot that I did that wow lmao

Episode 5 — Save the Cat

- My friend who's ahead me said wait for episode 5 now I'm fucking S H OO K - this episode name has me shook I can't - its WRITTEN BY NOELLE?? WE'RE FUCKED - I love Wrong Hordak SM what an idiot - Catradora really is gonna be canon wow - WTAF IS THAT SHE IS NOT MY CATRA SHE IS A CLONE her hair tho?? kinda nice - the way HP said "your Catra." like low-key he said gay rights - "You broke my heart. And he has made me whole again." - "We both know I don't matter"  and "you're and idiot" "I know" THESE TWO ARE MADE FOR EACH OTHER - SHE JUMPED OFF A CLIFF FOR HER - the way she's holding her?? so soft - SHE RA IS LOOKING FLY -- and is she taller?? - "You miscalculated" YES QUEEN I LOVE HER. THAT WHOLE FIGHT SCENE WAS AMAZING - FuCK HORDEP PRIME - Darla is the best Light Hope SUX - the "Hey, Adora" was SO SOFT IM SO HAPPY

That episode really hiT different Catradora is DEFINITELY canon EVERYONE SAY THANK YOU NOELLE

Episode 6 - Taking Control

- Adora. Chill. - Catra's trauma...wow - honestly I have SO MUCH TO SAY and so little at all. - The ending w Catra joining was so cute and all the Catradora interactions are SENDING ME this is the development I need - "Adora. Stay." MY HEART - thank fuck that chip is gone YAY - Entrapta and Catra making up? Catra saying "Thank you and I'm sorry" her least favourite words -- characters DEVELOPMENT - The way Catra blushed when Adora transformed GIRL YOURE GAY - SHERAS POWER IS TOO MUCH SLAY GIRL - Horde Prime FucK off challenge I hate him - Micah tryna be a father figure? cute - the endING FUCK WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT SPINNERALLA??? POOR NETOSSA

okay but where tf is DT, KYLE, LONNIE AND ROGELIO??

my mum is so tired of me screaming lmaoo

Episode 7 — Perils Of Peekabloo

- Catra just SAT on Adora's lap the PDA is unmatched - We love a filler wow - we literally can't trust anyone this shit sucks - SCORFUMA STANS STAY WINNING - Mermista and Seahawk kinda cute tho (the  heart eyes) - DT I KNEW IT   - CASH KITTEN? EYE—JUST SAY SUGAR MOMMA AND GO - NETOSSA DOESN'T DESERVE THIS - MERMISTA TO - EVERYONE is chipped WTF - DT is a theatre gay through and through   - THEY'RE FUCKED WE'RE FUCKED - NOOOO SCORPIA 😭😭😭 - "I'm the muscle, remember?" - SCORPIA'S POWER, HER REACH, IT'S AMAZING - everything is going downhill FAST - "Happy Anniversary" EYE—😭😭😭😭😭

well that sucked What the fuck we gone do now?

Episode 8 - Shot in the Dark

- The soft smile Catra gave Adora while teasing? love that - loving this new squad - the wAY HER TAIL FLUFFED UP SHES SO SCARED MAN - Wrong Hordak is my main g - the LAUGHING!! THE BLUSHING!! EVERYONE CAN SMELL THE GAY TENSION - omg Catra being the brains of the operation?? yes please - "Catra's first mission" THEY'RE SO OBNOXIOUS I LOVE THEM - "I'm going to kill your friends." "Please don't." we are ASCENDING - Casta? Strike her down anyway please 🙏 - Adora is SO WHIPPED the way she blushed at Catra making the door - "It's such a cute sneeze" BOW KNOWS IT CATRA IS CUTE AND THATS THE TEA - literallyyyy I hate SW GTFO CHALLENGE get OFF my screen 😡 - CATRA WHY DID YOU LUNGE AT THAT THING?? - OMFG MAGICAT?? (Nope dumb bitch) - "I'm coming!" "Hurry." - "I'm sorry. I got angry. It's something I'm working on" ADORA GLOWED AND SAID "You are?" WE LOVE SELF GROWTH AHH - It was Catra's hand OMFG IN THE TRAILER - Adora and cat thing being magic? we love it - MELOG IS SO CUTE and Catra can talk to it?? wowow - they love taking strays lmao - Wrong Hordak's character arc is the best one in the show - CATRA HAS AN IDEA?? YES - Preach Casta shut Weaver up - "That about sums it up, yes." I love them as a team - the hand holding? so cutee Catra don't pretend you're not whipped - oml Glimmer kissing Catra before Adora? EYE— Glitra shippers gonna be so happy at that one moment lmaoo - THEY'RE HOMEEEE

ahhh we're getting close to the end nooo

Episode 9 —An ill Wind

- oh god oh god - Catra is so badass with Melog i LOVE HER EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANIMAL  - having to fight your own wife? that shit sucks - Erelandia? it's free - omg HP is angry asfff - FROSTA CHILL SHE PUNCHED HER HARD - Adora and Catra are soft 🥺 that's all I have to say

Episode 10 — Return to the Fright Zone

- omg are we gonna see Kyle?? Lonnie? Rogelio?? (also nope, stupid hoe) - okay but Netossa getting screentime? YES PLEASE - I love the intro sm ahhhh - also her knowing everyone's weakness? love that shit - ouch Perfuma ouch didn’t have to go so hard on Catra and YET - omg I forgot Bow's dads existed - "Mostly bad memories" 😔😔😔 - competitive gfs for the win - Catra FLEW tho WOW Scorpia is STRONK - the dad jokes are immaculate - "I'm working is being a better friend. That has to count for something right?" - "We don't throw tanks at our friends" sis you don't give flowers to your them at this current time either - "why did I get stuck with the water Princess?" Catra...baby I love you - omg there's a fail safe THANK FUCK I was legit speechless - "There's real power in love and friendship" preACH IT GIRLIE - SCORPIA FIGHT IT YESSS - legit forgot Spinny and Netossa were fighting lmao oof - FINALLY ANGST OVER THE WIVES ARE BACK - omg THE PAN TO ADORA ABOUT BEING VULNERABLE AHHHH - Perfuma is Catra's therapist that's my headcanon - OMFG I FORGOT ABOUT SW FUCK SHIT CATRA BABY IM SORRY

damn I'm stressed out

Episode 11 — Failsafe

- Weaver STFU challenge - them taking about their abuse? we love to see - "We— I could really use your help" KILL ME NOW THEY'RE TOO MUCH - "Not because I like you" she says SMILING - Melog is Catra's affectionate side prove me wrong - Stan Entrapta for clear skin - SW doesn't deserve rights (as per usual) - DONT TOUCH HER BITCH LITERALLYYYY WHYYY - and now She Ra is glitching?? fuck - Catra is so jumpy eye— "Trust Me" MY HEART SBSBDB - Weaver really called her a DISTURBANCE STFU 💀💀💀 - Entrapta and bird horse ftw what a tag team - OMG NO BE CAREFUL - "Did you just jump in fire to save me?" SHE WAS SO SMUG - can SW burn like... now? - "It's none of your business" LITERALLY BUTT OUT  - "Catra, she distracts you, confuses you." WEAVER I FUCKING HATE YOU SM I FUCKING I WILL PUNCH MY SCREEN - Entrapdak being a thing? I do not know how to feel - "Your imperfections are beautiful."  I am.... conflicted - SW doesn't deserve screen time - Catra is an i no cap (I genuinely have no clue what I meant so sorry about that) - i think the fuck not - this episode is so stressful - Catra saving Adora >>>>>>>>> - what an awful reunion for Glimmer damn - "It doesn't always have to be you!" IKR IT SHOULD BE WEAVER - fuck dark magic fuck it all - Catra's upset?? no my baby 🥺 - this whole episode is just traumatising - Adora's heart do be glowing - Catra's LEAVING?? why?? - "What do you want Adora?" - MY HEART BEEN BROKE SO MANY TIMES I DONT KNOW WHAT TO BELIEVE 😭😭 - omg this time instead of Adora leaving it's Catra (you are a dumbass DUH) - that H U R T S - ADORA TELL HER YEs QUEEN

omg HEART NEXT???

Episode 12 — Heart Part 1

- I am not prepared for this - Adora...baby I'm so sorry - Glimbow moment with a banjo?? that was cute - Adora really is a party popper - "Adora doesn't want me. Not like I want her." AND THAT'S ON LESBIANISM BUT ALSO FUCKING OUCH  - but really Catra...do you really think Adora doesn't want you? girl are youb B L I N D?? - Wrong Hordak is MY GUY - Stan the rebellion for clear skin - NOOO WHAT THE FUCK MY HEART DON'TPLAY WITH ME LIKE THAT THEY NEARLY KISSED AND IT WAS A FUCKING SIMULATION - real Catra be CAREFUL - "We have to warn Adora" YES SIS WARN YOUR GF  - "I thought I could make my own destiny" U STILL CAN SIS - I'm scared I'm fucking scared - my HEART IS BEATINGG FASTT - I really hate Horde Prime uhhhhhhhgg - for once in your sorry life do something good Weaver jfc - "I can't leave her behind again" - BEST FRIEND SQUAD + MELOG YES - "Bow, I love you." GLIMBOW IS BACK ON AHHH - BUT AT WHAT COST??? (literally what am I saying??) - "You deserve love too." AND THAT'S ON PERIODT - Glimmer coming in clutch!! - Mermista and Seahawk do be cute tho - Micah is actually the worst rn wow - "Goodbye, my oldest enemy" CATRA COME QUICK AHH

the last episode....I'm not ready to say goodbye

Episode 13 — Heart Part 2

- ofc this is written by Noelle - "Hey, Adora" MY HEART - "I'll catch up okay? Get to the heart." - SW ACTUALLY DIED?? THANK YOU MY GIRLS CAN HEAL NOW

andd that's as far as I got before freaking the fuck out with everything that was happening onscreen but THE CATRADORA KISS WAS EVERYTHING and the ending was perfect 🥺💖

—

Thank you Crew-Ra, Noelle for making such a beautiful and heartwarming show, this will be remembered for years to come because what this show did was incredible and unlike anything I've ever watched.

#she ra #catra spop #adora spop #spop spoilers #spop s5

[connor-murphy-trash]

hi can i blease have some modern au Race hcs? idc what i just love him

AN: Hi guys! I am so sorry this has been in my inbox for forever. I’m not sure if this is even coherent at this point because I wrote to over the course of two weeks because I couldn’t focus on it. So I don’t know how this came out. But I hope you enjoy it anyways!

TW: Being sick, talks about an orphanage

Word Count: 1,733

Genre: Fluff

You were the new kid in school

It was your first week there

You would always ride the bus

Your parents used the only car your family had so they could go to work

Of course, the bus you rode was always the last one to show up

So you would hang around just people watching or working on some homework or something

But you were stuck on a question for your bio homework

Then you spotted someone across the room who was in the same class as you

So you went to ask him for help

You walked over to him

And he was sitting with a bunch of other boys

Who you assumed were all friends because they seemed to always ride the same bus and hang out together at lunch

You introduced yourself to him

And he said his name was Elmer

He walked you back to the bench you were originally sitting on

And helped you with the question

Once it was done

You thanked him

And started talking

His bus was about to pull up so you quickly exchanged numbers so if you had any more questions about the homework he could help you

Soon after Elmer’s bus left

Yours arrived

Later that night you and Elmer started talking again

Just getting to know each other

You told him how nice it was to have someone to talk with

Considering you hadn’t made any new friends at the school yet

So Elmer invited you to sit with him and some of his other friends at lunch the next day

You agreed to do so

So the next day you met his friends

And there were a LOT of them

Luckily you got on quite well with them all

You aren’t going to lie tho

It was kinda intimidating

There were just so many of them to keep track of

Then you asked how they all had met

In the most casual way, you had ever heard

Albert said that they all lived at the same orphanage

You were slightly shocked by this

You just didn’t expect it

But you accepted it and moved on with the conversation

The boy nicknamed Finch was telling you about how good his aim with a slingshot is

When a VERY attractive blond boy sat in the only empty seat left at the table

Which just so happened to be right next to you

“Are you guys trying to replace me with some new kid?”

He gasped and made an overdramatic hurt expression

Which made you laugh a little

Hearing you laugh made the boy smile slightly

You introduced yourself and he said  he went by the name Racetrack Higgins

Race for short

“Well it’s very nice to meet you ‘Race for Short’”

It was his turn to laugh at your joke

“I like them, Jack can we keep them?”

Jack seemed like he was the main person in charge

All of the other boys seemed to look up to him and respect his decisions

So when Race asked this

Everyone’s attention turned to Jack

“I suppose if they want to stick around, they can”

The boys were very happy about this

It was surprising to have so much praise just because Jack said you could stay

You guess then that’s a big deal

They even add you to their group chat

Which you imagine is going to be constantly blowing up your phone

But it’s okay

Because you finally made some friends!

A few weeks later, you were fully part of their group

You got a chance to message and talk with each of them individually

And you loved them all

But you loved Race the most

As in

You developed a slight crush on him

But you weren’t going to act on those feelings

You just barely became friends with everyone

You weren’t going to ruin that all because you had a crush

Everything was going amazing with your new group of friends

You were super close to Elmer, Jojo, Mush, and Davey

But you loved all of the boys

And girls

Jack was officially dating Katherine Plummer

Apparently, he had been pining over her for a while

So it was kinda a big deal

Also Davey’s sister, Sarah, recently started hanging out with you guys too

It was nice to have some gal pals and not be stuck with the boys all the time

One day you had to stay home from school because you were sick

You normally would have the first period with Jojo, Specs, and Race

So when both you and Race didn’t show up

Specs asked if you were out for the day in the group chat

He said that Race was home sick too

You weren’t the closest with Race

Because you didn’t want your feelings for him to grow and ruin your chance in the whole friend group

So when he texted you privately

And asked how you were doing

It threw you off a little

But you did have to admit

It was nice knowing he cared about you

You told him about how you weren’t feeling well

You had a fever and could barely breathe and had a bad cough

Basically, you had a really bad cold

And apparently, Race had one too

Just not quite as bad as you

You couldn’t really do much but lay in bed

Whereas Race just had a stuffy nose and a bit of a cough

So he offered to come over to your house and keep you company

Also to take care of you because both of your parents were going to be at work all day

You tried to make up an excuse because you didn’t want your crush to see you when you were this gross and sick

But your foggy brain couldn’t think of any good ones

So you reluctantly agreed

Race got to your house about a half hour later

Despite it being a ten-minute drive from the orphanage to your house

When Race showed up

He had a shopping bag filled with things

Simple snacks like crackers, cheerios, Sprite, etc

And a few things to entertain you both like movies and playing cards

You were not expecting all of that

But it was sweet nonetheless

You guys played a few rounds of go fish

Because that’s all you could handle mentally at the moment

And afterward, you were exhausted

Having no energy sucks

But Race didn’t want you to push yourself

So he offered to put on a movie

He apparently brought a bunch of Disney and Pixar movies

And he had you choose which one to watch first

You chose Tangled

He put it into your computer and set it up to play on your TV

Then he sat next to you on your bed

His back up against your headboard

Sitting on top of the blankets

You were laying underneath them curled into a ball

“You can lay down with me Race, it’s okay”

“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. I’m okay right here.”

“Race you are sick too. I’m telling you to lay down, you don’t have a choice.”

So he scooted down so he was laying

Still on top of the blankets

“Get your ass under here Race. You are going to get cold.”

“Are you sure, Y/N?”

He was so nervous about making you feel weird

It was cute

But you told him to get under the blankets

So he did

And he stayed on his side of the bed

Eventually, you started to drift into sleep

As you were only half asleep you said you were cold

And you cuddled into Races side

You put your head onto his chest

And wrapped an arm around his middle

“Is this okay?” you mumbled

Even tho you were half asleep and didn’t really know what you were doing you still asked

That made him blush a little

He said it was okay

Then he slowly wrapped his arms around you

As if he was protecting you from the outside world

He repeated your question to make sure you were comfortable with it

All he got in response was a slight head nod and a small hum of approval

And you snuggling even closer to him

Now he was really blushing

He was glad your eyes were closed so you couldn’t see it

Or the small smile that was forming on his face

Soon you drifted off into a peaceful dreamland

Race stayed awake for a little while just watching the movie

And making sure you slept peacefully

But eventually, the wear of the day mixed with the fact that he was also ill got to him

And he too drifted off into a peaceful slumber with you in his arms

Right where you belonged

Once school ended Sarah and Davey came over to your house to check on you

They had texted you earlier in the day to make sure that was okay

They let themselves into your house

And went up to your bedroom

Their jaws dropped when they saw you and Race cuddled up sleeping

Sarah immediately took out her phone and snapped a pic of you two

They decided you looked well taken care of

So they left a note on your desk and went home

About 20 mins later both your phone and Races were blowing up and awoke you from your peaceful slumber

You both checked your phone and the group chat was freaking out

You scroll up to the top of the new messages

NEW TEXT FROM: Sar Bear💖🐻

“Davey and I went to check on you two, but you seemed to be doing just fine without us 😉😍”

*insert picture of you and Race cuddled up with a Disney movie in the background*

All of the boys were hounding on you two in the chat

Sending heart eyes, key smashes, and “I SHIP IT"’s

Also some “I called it!” and “Use protection”’s

When you saw all this you were so embarrassed

You wanted to hide away forever

But before you could pull away from the cuddling position you were in with Race

He held you even tighter to his body

And gave you a small kiss on your forehead

Maybe getting tested wasn’t going to be too bad

As long as you had Race right by your side

#newsies #Modern Newsies #newsies musical #newsies modern au #newsies movie #92sies #newsies 1992 #newsies x reader #race x reader #race #racetrack #racetrack higgins #race higgens #race higgins x reader #racetrack x reader #racetrack higgins x reader #liz is writing #liz is creating #headcanons #writing #fanfic

[kjiaein]

50 questions tag

tagged by: @kihyunuu tryna take up all my time,, watch me do this in under 30 minutes bc i just. type fast

1. What takes up too much of your time? doing my makeup?? (which i Do Not mind) math hw??? maybe jun and taemin??? hockey?? there’s so many options here lmao

2. What makes your day better? talking to my mom and my friends. literally can make my whole day in 10 minutes by talking to my mom i’m rlly a mommas girl :( bye

3. What’s the best thing that happened you today? um i didn’t even leave my room today so Nothing,,, ig washing my face and feeling rlly refreshed?? 

4. What fictional place would you like to go? uhhh camelot?? BET. i’ve been obsessed with camelot and king arthur tales since i was 7 and i Still am. so i rlly Want to (even tho i know medieval times were Horrible.)

5. Are you good at giving advice? ppl say i am but i don’t rlly know?? i just try my best considering what i’ve seen ppl go through and what i’ve personally gone through 

6. Do you have any mental illness?  i have not been diagnosed by a doctor with any mental illness

7. Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis? no THANK GOD. 

8. What musician inspired you the most? um there’s been a mix of ppl. but for the most part jonghyun has been in my life for so long and he’s just Amazing and i learn from him everyday of my life

9. Have you ever fallen in love? i’ve liked guys but i wouldn’t call it love? bc we were close but we weren’t THAT close lmao i’m so cautious of males bye

10. What’s your dream date?  uhhh take me to a sporting event idc if it’s pro or college,, and i guarantee you’ll win me over pretty quickly,,, or like to dinner somewhere and go for a walk after?? like on the riverwalk??

11. What do others notice about you? ig ppl say i’m rlly sweet and caring,, or thoughtful bc i remember things others don’t and i try my best to give ppl what they want and help them??

12. What is the annoying habit you have? wobirwrb idk just zoning out?? i do it a lot. or um i don’t reply to ppl with no reason sometimes i just get Annoyed at the world obwogb

13. Do you still talk to your first love? sorry do i even have one,, if you count the one guy who i was closest to,, i have not talked to him in 2 yrs bc he’s Busy and i am also Busy so.

14. How many ex’s do you have? lmao funny you think i’ve dated ppl

15. How many songs are on your playlist? i don’t use playlists,, i turn my entire library onto shuffle and there are 300+ songs in my library 

16. What instruments can you play? none i tried the violin and piano once,, not that good at it 

17. Who do you have the most pictures of? um my biases,, myself and my dog,,, they’re tied like my dog won’t let any male win

18. Where would you like to go before you die? korea? japan? definitely ireland :( 

19. What is your zodiac? virgo yay

20. Do you relate to it? i mean ig but it’s not 100% accurate for me so

21. What is happiness to you? being able to do what i want without judgement from anyone and being loved for that??,,, literally idk what it is to me nvm

22. Are you going through anything right now? um yeah. not gonna talk abt it tho

23. What’s the worst decision you’ve ever made? ,,, there’s a lot of them Pls. probably some of the friends i’ve made that have deterred me from the paths i’ve always wanted

24. What’s your favorite store? uhhhh i like a lot of nasty gal but i don’t own much from there?? i Love victorias secret and jcpenney

25. What’s your opinion on abortion? i don’t talk abt this. with Anyone. so next.

26. Do you keep a bucket list? no? i just do what i want when i want it. and sometimes it’s in the moment so 

27. Do you have a favorite album at the moment? currently all night by astro,, kings thank u 

28. What do you want for your birthday? ,,, nothing? maybe a hockey jersey? but even then i would be satisfied just spending time with ppl 

29. What are most peoples first impressions of you? quiet and sweet,,, like they’re not 100% wrong but i can get LOUD when i get rlly close to u 

30. What age do you seem according to most people? ppl say physically i look 13 but i act like 25

31. Where do you keep your phone while you’re sleeping? the edge of my bed? by my pillows,, where my head is Not bye

32. What word do you say the most? um. that’s IT.

33. What’s the oldest age you would date? 25-26?? that’s 7 yrs older so. 

34. What’s the youngest age you would date? 18. literally gotta be a whole year or the same age as me?? it’s gotta be LEGAL.

35. What job/career do most people say would suit you? ppl say i rlly belong in the medical field,, and the path i am on is in the medical field sooo

36. What’s your favorite music genre? ,,,,,, kpop. and pop. oooh but i love a good heartbreaking ost :) 

37. If you could live in any country in the world where would it be? america? i have so much freedom here. like why would i give the privilege i have up Pls

38. What is your current favorite song? it’s rlly between lights down low by max and grand bleu by 100% 

39. How long have you had this blog for? ,,,, too long. i think like 4-5 yrs?

40. What are you excited for? i’m excited for uh baseball games and to go hoomeee next month 

41. Are you a better talker or listener? both... why should i only do one? 

42. What is the last productive thing you did? .... shower lmao

43. What do you want for Christmas? ..... idk a hockey jersey,,, for me to grow up and get a bf lmao,, more so want family time?? maybe my passport bye.

44. What class do you get the best grades in? history and english,, literally i excelled in english and history since 4th grade

45. On a scale from 1-10, how are you feeling right now? 8???

46. What can you see yourself doing in 10 years? um i hope i’m married and working as an athletic trainer in a pro sport?

47. When did you get your first heart break? when my former best friend ditched me halfway through 9th grade and talked abt me behind my back to our other friends :)) 

48. At what age do you want to get married? .... i want to be married by 25-27,,, but with my career path good luck to me

49. What career did you want to have as a child? veterinarian lmao why did i ever i hate reptiles so 

50. What do you crave now? cheese,,, ice cream :(( idk i took care of my cravings by ordering cook out last night bye

i tag @2baekxing @cutesunggyu @yiffxing @mmblaq ,,, i always tag the same ppl ik i’m sorry

#tagged

[meganlpie]

Pretty Please?

Anonymous asked: Congrats, Meg! Can I get a Halloween request?? I know it’ll probably be after Halloween before it’s posted, but idc. I was hoping to get a Dean x fem!reader where she tries to convince Dean to go trick-or-treating in family costumes (they have a couple little ones) and maybe Sam agrees to go too and helps convince Dean into going??

Here is your one-shot, anon! I do not own Dean or Sam. They belong to the writers/creators of Supernatural.

Warnings: Fluff.

Pairings: Dean Winchester x fem!reader, Sam Winchester

“No.” The word was out of your husband’s mouth before you could even ask the question. “Dean…” you pleaded. “No, Y/N. I hate Halloween and you know it.” You huffed a little. “But Dean, it’s for the kids. Please?” Dean’s green eyes met your (e/c) ones. “You’re using our kids against me?” You smiled softly.

           "Dean, they want this. It’s all they’ve talked about. Please? Pretty please? Even Sam has agreed to go.“ Dean groaned lowly. You were giving him that look. The one that you knew he couldn’t resist in a million years. Not from you and not from your children. "Alright fine…but do I have to wear that?” You shrugged. “Better than what Sam is wearing. Our daughter insists that I’m Dorothy and she wants to be the lion which leaves Uncle Sam being the Wicked Witch.”

           Dean busted out laughing. “Okay. Okay. I’ll go. If only to see Sammy with green face paint and a pointed hat.” You clapped your hands together. “Yay! Now get ready, Tin Man while I go tell our children.” Dean let out a little grumble and you giggled. You walked over to him and kissed his lips. “I’ll make it up to you later,” you promised, earning a signature Dean smirk. “Oh really?” You rolled your eyes, but nodded.

           "I’ll hold you to that.“ He pulled you close and placed a searing kiss to your lips. "Ew.” You broke apart to see Sam there with your youngest in his arms. “Yeah, ew,” he commented with a smile. “Guess what? Dean agreed to go with us.” Your little girl, already in her lion costume, cried out in glee. “Yay, Daddy!”

           If he hadn’t agreed before, Dean would have agreed to anything now. His children and your opinions of him meant everything to Dean. His daughter saw him as a superhero in a way and to see her looking at him with such a happy expression made the hunter melt. “The lion is ready and the scarecrow is working on it. Now, Uncle Sam here needs to go get ready,” Sam said and you took your daughter from him. “Hey kiddo, why don’t you go grab a granola bar from the kitchen and eat it while you wait for us to finish getting dressed?”

           The little girl nodded and clamored out of your arms. Once she was gone, you started to get dressed yourself. You were grateful you had been able to find a less revealing version of your costume. Dean could be extremely jealous sometimes and he didn’t want other men looking at his wife. You understood. You didn’t want other women hitting on Dean either.

           "It’s worth it,“ he said suddenly. You looked at him quizzically. "Seeing her face when she found out I agreed to go. It was worth having to go out on this insane night.” You cupped his cheek with your hand. “You are her world, Dean. Our son’s too. They miss you when you’re gone, but they never complain. When they told me the only thing they wanted was to trick-or-treat with you, I didn’t have the heart to tell them that you hate the day.”

           Dean wrapped his arms around you again. “Thank you.” He rested his head on yours and nothing else needed to be said. It wasn’t easy for Dean to share feelings except with his children, so you’d learned to read Dean’s cues and in between the lines. “I love you, Dean.” His arms tightened around you.

           A knock on the door broke you apart. “Mom, Dad can we go? I don’t want to miss all the good candy!” You chuckled. Just like his father. Dean’s eyes lit up. Candy. That was the only part of Halloween he liked. “We’ll be there in a minute. Go grab a quick bite. I don’t want you eating all your candy before we even get home.” Your son grumbled a bit, but you heard his steps retreating.

           You and Dean finished dressing and you headed for the door. Dean stopped you by gentle grabbing your wrist. “What is it, Dean?” He stared at you for a moment before speaking. “I’ve been thinking. About cutting back on my hunting.” You looked at him in surprise. “Really?” He nodded. “Yeah. I want to spend more time with you and the kids. I’ll still hunt some, but I don’t want to be gone all the time anymore. I’m getting to old for it anyway.” You laughed. “You’re not old. But if that’s what you want.”

           "It is. I’m tired of missing important days in the kids’ lives.“ You kissed him again to put his worries as ease. "I will support your decisions, Dean. I love the idea of having you home more and I know the kids will too. Now let’s get out there before they start to riot.” Dean let out a laugh and followed you out of your bedroom.

           Trick-or-treating didn’t take very long. In all her excitement, your daughter had worn herself out and fell asleep in Dean’s arms. Your son ended up doing the trick-or-treating for both of them. Not that he minded. He still managed to rack up quite a good amount of candy before the night was done. But he was exhausted too and only ate a couple pieces of candy when you got back to the bunker.

           Sam and Dean carried the kids to their beds and then Dean came back to you. You were checking the candy to make sure nothing was dangerous. “Babe, why don’t you go to bed. You’ve had a long day with the kids. I’ll do this and join you in a few minutes.” You smiled at him and agreed. You really were tired.

           You stood, kissed Dean and headed back toward your bedroom. Then you heard Dean moan and stopped short. “Don’t you dare eat all that candy, Dean Winchester!” you scolded. “Aw, Y/N. Pretty please?” You rolled your eyes and sighed. That was Dean for you. “Save some for the kids." 

(a/n: I hope you like it!)

@brewsthespirit-blog @fairytalesexistxx @aikibriarrose @jotink78 @daddy-kink-confirmed

#supernatural #spn #dean winchester #dean winchester x reader #dean x reader

[whyshanti]

twenty nineteen. periodt.

i genuinely felt the need to write this because i was bored i have not written anything in a really long time. but mostly because there’s only a few who might read this and not care afterwards. it sucks to not be able to do something that i used to enjoy for quite a while. but here i am!

a lot of thoughts to unburden and a lot of unspoken feelings to unpack. let’s get to it, bih.

1. this year felt like it was dragging on. i wanted it to end asap.

so this year, i actually had A LOT of time. where did it go? 

to: movies, series, anime, music, watching youtube videos, breakdowns, feeling stuck & paralyzed,  academics, reading articles about pop culture & mainstream shit, going out with friends, chatting random ppl at night bc i thought i could trust them (and some of them, i can), and etc.

but on a more serious note, i really was more into the world of media, of both mainstream and indie worlds. i still can’t believe i got through this semester when i have been doing these things unrelated to uni. some ppl are also baffled by this activity log that i have. 

point is: i felt like a walking zombie. probably looked like one as well. there is this routine that i have to do and i got really sick of myself. i didn’t have the motivation to strive more. i was always either sleeping (at least for the first half of the year) or watching. it all feels lifeless. the latter part of the year, my body clock was wrecked. i did not like the weather during daytime. at all. i slept during the day when i did not have classes then i was awake at night. but i try to get as much sleep as i can because my health is declining. i think.

also this year felt like it had 3 sequels. unnecessary, boring, full-of-jump-scares type of sequels. fuck.

2. feeling anxious and chill at the same time.

the only thing that made me feel chill at the latter part of the year is the fact that this shit... like all these shitty things we’ve been doing... will pass anyway. 

i don’t know if it’s because of the new system that was implemented but it definitely feels like the stress levels were high only during exam weeks. for real. i am grateful to have THAT kind of “stress privilege (??)” but i also wish i was stressing over something that gives me LIFE. i know i’m studying for something that will actually help me provide something for myself and for my family but my soul (oh crap here’s where things get cheesy) screams i should do something else. 

my friend always tells me to chill but i couldn’t because there’s always that nagging thought that i have to do something productive everyday. i think it stems from past disappointments, failed expectations from ppl close to me, and just basically feeling like a failure. i’m a frantic mess who somehow has the time to do unnecessary things. wish the energy was put into finishing acads on time or earlier, but here we are. think they meant that i should be chill with mysef. to be kind to myself. to not panic and breathe.

another thing is that there’s a load of information shoved in my head that really paralyzes me to act on something.

3. leaving behind the things i’ve outgrown.

it’s so funny how i’ve met few new people this year who i already treasure only to have quite a number of people to walk out of my life.

it’s not really surprising to me. i think we all wanted it to happen anyway. i’m just happy that things kind of subtly fell apart for things to make more sense. the feeling is kind of like how a misplaced puzzle piece is put into its rightful place. finally, i don’t have to force myself and i think the feelings are mutual. anyway, this year was a revelation in itself despite how dragging the pacing felt. love how the gunk went out and i see now what i’ve been blind to. chuck the deuce! definitely a thank u, next moment.

4. meeting new people, unexpected unions.

i definitely did not expect to form connections and be reunited with some of my old friends this year. also witnessed deepened friendships. 

there’s always this thing where i put my energy on a high level when i’m meeting new people just to seem decent and happy then slowly revealing how tired, sad, and boring i can be. then there’s that fear of losing people’s interest in me or people not becoming excited to talk to me about... anything really. never thought i’d have this fear of losing certain people in my life. i want to detach myself from that and from people themselves too (in a healthy way ofc). 

i’ve never ever felt like i could lose people in an instant. there’s that thing where i worry if i’m too much or i’m lacking for people. so i appreciate people who let me know if i’m crossing the line or if i’m doing something that completely annoys them because i really want to be part of people’s lives, meaningfully and genuinely. a good one. i don’t want to half-ass my relationships with other people and i seek loving relationships that thrive and inspire where it doesn’t only get good at the start but is continually progressing even when we don’t see each other often. it’s fascinating how as we get older, we see how relationships are not as simple as we think they are but really are simple at the same time. we have different goals, we are at different stages in our lives, we are facing shit that nobody else seems to understand and things that don’t seem to end, and we can only hope that our mere presence and emotionally available hearts will listen to whatever the other person has to unburden. 

to somehow let them know that they don’t need permission to rest and to do things that they are afraid of pursuing. 

4a. discovering new artists.

AURORA: the most underrated artist for sure. watched every interview/video/set because she is that bitch. her SONGS, man. i swear. she is that ethereal fairy from the forest. her fucking voice just draws me in. she deserved a better role in frozen 2 tho. she needs to be a lead in a musical animated movie. idc idc i said what i said.

beabadoobee: fucking rockstar, reviving the 90s grunge music and looks.

Billie Eilish: a badass. hate how she still stans bieber tho. 

5. daydreaming of a new life.

you don’t know how many times i’ve been dreaming to have a big house. 

it’s time. we really need a new house. i’m not, as what the kids say, vibing with this old house anymore. this is what i wish to leave behind as soon as possible. how do i even get the MONEY to afford it? i’m just hoping for a miracle to happen, you know. i really wish my family gets to be in a better home soon.

i think if u know me, u might have caught me spacing out a few times. 

idk why this always happens. it’s so rude to the person speaking to me but my mind literally drifts off to another planet. it’s not that they’re boring. i just can’t help it. i feel like shit thinking about how many times it has happened to me. 

sometimes, i dream of being this whole new different person. 

someone who is better than who i am. someone who is good at something and is passionate about the things she does. there are a lot of things i am interested in doing but i don’t have the courage to actually do it. idk why i always turn into a statue when i think of things that i wanna do.

6. God.

it’s been a long time. i have lost contact with You but You are always there to patch things up for me. every effin’ time. i cry everytime.

it must be because i was raised in a christian setting. that’s why i always think it’s You who’s working behind the scenes. but still i am grateful.

saved me from certain people.

saved me this semester.

saved me from pulling worthless all-nighters.

provided me financially esp when i thought i had nothing.

prevented a severe acid reflux situation.

gave me new friends.

did literally so many things that saved me from bad situations and people in general like WHO DOES THAT??

7. a life without a plan.

this is literally what i wanted to happen. not carelessly but like where i don’t have to worry about what to do next. just let things be and go with the flow. the first half of this year, i really did not think things through as i normally would and i let plans fall just to enjoy what was in front of me. be at ease and be present during that time. and i did. it was a peaceful, cheery time tbh.

8. every day i wanted to start over just to get over a lot of things.

9. i missed a lot of ppl.

10. i wanted to be held. not by a certain someone. not romantically. but by anyone close to me. *plays i’m with you by avril lavigne*

sometimes we all just need a long hug. that’s all. and it’d be nice to hear more stories from people. :)

11. not everybody will reciprocate the same energy that i send out to them and it’s okay.

this bummed me out. felt like an effin’ loser but i’ve learned that people have businesses to do. life doesn’t always happen the way we want it to.

12. this the final year of college. just finish it already, dumbass. 

13. why can’t i just be kathryn bernardo or AURORA for like a month or a year? i promise i will not ruin their careers lmao.

14. i want to make major changes in my stupid life but money is an issue.

15. the stars are below the sky now.

the state of the environment is the same as of our minds. polluted and overloaded with gibberish to the point that we get scared of doing one thing at a time and where we also don’t throw away the unnecessary baggage/s. 

we’re so intent on doing things all at the same time. finishing everything in one sitting. being productive became an addiction and it scared me how i was becoming affected by this. there’s this constant thought that we collectively share which is to do something by every day and it only adds up to people’s anxiety and depression. social media definitely made us aware of mental illnesses/disorders but then it became a trend. people self-diagnose themselves and end up with the wrong treatment. some people use it as a tool to get followers and... ugh it’s all a mess. i hope people get the right treatment/s AND/or professional help because if they don’t, they’ll lose themselves. i mean... just look at the sky. there’s literally no sign of a star now if u live in the city. we’ve lost sight of what should guide us. we are unconsciously following a false light thru our devices. 

i’m not good at analogies or at explaining things as u can tell. but moving on...

this hyper self-awareness that i have gained from social media has its advantages but is also distracting me from living my best life. i didn’t realize that i was making my own christmas lights inside my seemingly dark mind when really... it’s just clouded by all this information that’s coming in fast and has affected who i am and certain areas of my life. i’ve almost forgotten this and i’ve come to believe again that there’s always an ever-present light and it will take time to get used to its brightness once my mind gets clearer by the day. hopefully, it will.

anyway, CLIMATE CHANGE IS REAL AND WE NEED TO SAVE EARTH. 

16. men are trash. 

17. the people who i should avoid always looks odd or unpleasant and has bad energy. i know shit when i sense one. 

18. i’m not happy with my life and with who i am but i’ll work with what i’ve got.

life gives u a mirror and shits on your face. sheesh.

for some reason, i can’t forget what my adviser told me during my 4th year of high school. she told me “it seems like you’re a person full of regrets” and every time i have a cryfest, i think of that. idk why. (never underestimate the power of a few words, folks). you know how like in flow charts, u encounter decision points? the diamond shapes? i think i always decide no and end up with the worst consequence and then there’s no more starting over. 

i don’t think i understand flow charts well. ugh. 

i can’t come up with a cool transition to me having insecurities so let’s say i did!

some people’s beauty, inspiring. but others just make you feel like shit.

i really want to explore my feminine side more because i was more masculine when i was younger. i’m not gentle, i’m a bit aggressive. and it just doesn’t fit with who i want to be. idk why. and also, it’s fun (!!!). you get a taste of what it’s like and it’s so EMPOWERING at least for the short experience that i had. but can make me feel very conscious of my entire being and i just end up wearing cartoony disguises. ironic but BABY STEPS. when i think about it, there’s really no black or white answer whether this or that is feminine or masculine.  

self-love is not a 5-step process. 

it is continuous improvement of oneself to the point where you don’t give a fuck about what they say. i really envy the ones who are comfortable in their own skin, who are totally embracing their flaws. they just bloom. some people just look like them. like it’s SO THEM. unmistakably them. and i think if everyone had that, we would not have standards anymore.

oh, to live in a time where individuality is encouraged but is also discouraged when not lived up to its standards. hurray.

19. this year was the year of mindless decisions. periodt.

20. hoping that the new year, 2020, will be the year of CLARITY where i know who i really am, embracing it, and where i will not be taking anymore of anyone’s bullshit. where i know where i stand in my relationships with other people and vice versa. there will be intentional but meaningful endings that will pave the way for blossoming beginnings. 

let’s hope it unfolds the way it should be. for the better.

bonus: nobody knows what the fuck they’re doing. everyone’s just going with the flow. be yourself.

note: this is a compilation of thoughts, informally. thank u.

#2019

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Carly

Ali: save me Ali: this practice is dragging Carly: survive it & i'll help you forget you had to Ali: reckon i've only just come down Ali: but this sesh is making that happen hard and fast 😩 Ali: how's you Carly: aw baby no Carly: say you caught stage fright off me & you gotta leave rn k Carly: i was still up before i got brought down too Ali: dead believable Carly: i kno Ali: can't even blend into the furniture 'cos there is none Ali: so grunge rn Ali: unacceptable tho, who's bringing my baby down Carly: lie on the floor Carly: as protests go itd get the mood across Carly: ronan is Ali: yeah, 'less they think i'm about to go all acdc on 'em Ali: shouldn't have needed to ask but there we are Ali: what's got his knickers in a twist today Carly: wtf does that mean Carly: a load of his cousins are back on site Carly: fun Ali: oh babe Ali: missing out Ali: i'll show you, not at this rehearsal but when i'm actually bringing my rockstar a game Ali: omg is bartley there Carly: k Carly: yea he is Carly: so im not Ali: fun times Ali: i'd rather him over ronan but you do you Carly: if i wanted a bf Carly: but nah Carly: & hes not over it Ali: 😬 Ali: come to grab you Ali: awks Carly: yea Carly: like i kno im good thats why i cant save it all for you boy Carly: wife your own Ali: thought they weren't allowed to wife gorjas anyway Ali: tuttut Ali: you just out here tryna be community spirited Carly: yea im just living like one of you don't get it twisted lads Carly: cant make it clearer than fucking your cousin at your bday party Ali: damn Ali: stone cold boo Carly: told him how it had to be but he didnt wanna hear it Carly: had to show him instead you kno Ali: i get it, did the same but in reverse Ali: its cultural but its a bullshit excuse Ali: don't answer to anyone, so they don't like no, like Carly: yea? Carly: how fun Carly: like i dont answer to anyone either lads Ali: mhmm, you know how weird he got ick Ali: forreal Ali: my ma might say otherwise but shh Carly: mine wouldnt Carly: out here making her proud Ali: pop that on the next postcard Ali: glad you ain't here, lads Carly: ha Carly: wish you were tho you could distract Barty for me Carly: the grass is too wet for creeping Carly: fall on my arse Ali: poor baby Ali: i'd throw myself on that dick bomb for you Ali: lene can't even be mad Ali: loves chivalry Carly: aw Carly: youre too good Carly: i kno i should just go out there like idgaf but looking like this Carly: not gonna do me any favors Ali: like you're so 😍 there's gonna be a riot or you looking how you feeling Carly: wanna say yea to the first 1 but got the weight of last nite on me Ali: fuck this Ali: i'm coming and i'm bringing concealer Carly: might start a riot at rehearsal baby Carly: but idc if you dont Ali: nah, explained Ali: basically a feminist emergency Ali: how could they refuse Ali: don't need to mention we're gonna turn looks and party Carly: ha Carly: [sends selfie] Carly: thats what im working w Carly: emergency it is Ali: nah you still cute Ali: cuter than them, that's a given but i'll bring all my shit Ali: love a makeover moment Carly: youre so sweet Carly: love a happy lie Ali: no lies bitch Carly: ha k bitch Ali: a bitch better believe me Ali: imma make you when i'm through, don't worry Carly: you do have talent Carly: ive seen that Ali: 😉 Ali: tell you it's all natural or take the compliment hmm Carly: nobodys lashes look that good w out help Carly: but when i can see the freckles i kno you not going hard like Carly: so cute Ali: now who's the sweet one, shortcake Ali: 😊 Carly: facts baby Carly: im just saying 'em Ali: touche Ali: well your eye and hair colour combo is killer and we gon flaunt that Carly: its gonna clash w my skin if you keep making me blush boo Ali: nah, save your blushes for me Ali: stone cold fox, remember Ali: they'll never know Carly: dont let your gf kno Carly: dont wanna get grabbed by her either k Ali: 😂 Ali: she'll be gutted but cool with me Carly: love a 3way but Carly: she still scares me Ali: She's a pussycat really Carly: w you Carly: cuz youre cute Ali: so are you Ali: just a #confirmedstraight Ali: she can't be too nice, like, think of her rep Carly: ha Carly: tell her how many girls ive fucked Ali: tempting as it is to spice up the pillowtalk babe Ali: can't deal with the male gaze rant again 🙄 Carly: like you dont kno how to shhh her Ali: 😏 Ali: easy as a lad, like, but don't tell Carly: facts Carly: like i said you have talent baby Ali: backatcha Ali: for a straight girl, like 😘 Carly: ha Carly: yea lads arent no trick Ali: like you said you've fucked loads of girls too Carly: idk tho didnt stick around to tell me how it was Ali: hmm Ali: have to ask for a review next time Carly: fuck no Carly: might as well go to school and flunk that like Ali: awh baby Ali: how you expecting to learn anything 'bout treating a girl right from ronan Carly: idc Carly: as long as the lad is feeling what im doing Carly: & they do Ali: no doubt Carly: too much in bartys case Ali: hard life being a bad bitch Carly: ha you kno Ali: are any of his other cousins cute Ali: get the full set Carly: yea Carly: most are Ali: back again to homewreck hey Carly: couple are old but would Ali: shame i'm 💍 and they probs are too Carly: ha yea Carly: you could end yours w a txt but them nah Ali: you reckon? 😂 Carly: whats she gonna do Carly: show up here Carly: ill be like i dont share bitch Ali: probably Ali: shotgun toting da's don't scare her as much as they should Carly: k ill remember that Carly: hope mine dont show for my own reasons Ali: would probs scare off bart but also all the others Carly: youd think but hed just have a beer w them & b matey matey Carly: reckon hed sell me for a case if he could Carly: ship sailed w my virginity tho Ali: bummer really Ali: who knows what we coulda got outta that deal Ali: giving it away willynilly ugh past me Carly: they might wanna go harder for round 2 Carly: youre more talented now Ali: nice salespitch, babe Ali: i'm impressed, idk if they will be but worth a shot Carly: they would Carly: not that stupid Carly: & youre that cute Ali: like i'll wanna go with them when their chat is gonna be nowhere near as nice 😋 Carly: aw Carly: well you got me Carly: marital bed whenever Ali: but of course 😂 Carly: youre meant to laugh me into bed not out Ali: yeah and you're meant to wanna be there babe so it's chill Carly: k yea true Ali: even with my talents Ali: no turning water into wine, like Ali: sadly Carly: not w that attitude baby Ali: yeah being a debby downer's your only turn-off Ali: my ego thanks you, babe 😉 Carly: i'll work on the rest of you thanking me when you get here Ali: bitch... 😳 Ali: least it gon' be equal when I slay your makeover Carly: ill be grateful you kno Ali: i know

[brothalynchhung]

2017 overview

FOR FUCKS SAKEEE IVE BEEN DOING THIS FOR 5 YEARS LMFAOOOO anyways lets goo... this gone be a lot i learned a lot this year

the year started out...

kinda weird tbh like i was in a weird state

i was back to being obsessed following jk/gl lool

it was nice but i got to hopelessly obsessed

but they came back and it really motivated me it made me happy

hes so comforting until this day

he earned so much!! achieved so much! I'm so happy for him

i gained a lot this year too .. in a way

yeah 2017 was weird introspectively...

lot of internal rebuilding...

i did video 1 which was fun i got to make some cool shit and work hard on projects

i met my girl xy lol her talented ass

ate out a lot tbh i was a fatass beginning of 2017 wtf

still am tho wtf who am i kidding 🙄🙄🙄

jus classes with z as usual but winter 2017 was so weird cuz like.. i barely went to any of those classes LOL

video 1 was fun

adv com theories was ass idk how i got a B+ in that class i failed everything LMFAOO

phi was whatever

women and media was weird cuz of that weird girl but we got a good mark so whatever

quantitative LMFAOOO fuck that class and that bitch ass prof i didnt learn shit

other than that personally...i was going through some mental shit.. i felt alone. i felt out of it. i felt regretful

i felt so regretful i felt like shit

i fell into such a nostalgic moment like i just missed everything

jk kinda reminded me of like.. how i was? happy? in 2016 i kinda of left everything and secluded myself in a weird way other than fighting with ayt/mh on some bullshit i just was out of it.. i was chilling with weirdos lol

i was thinking like.. i miss how it is??? I'm not that different? i like all the people from my past why are we not that close

spring day came out.. that hit it. bullseye. 

childish gambinooo....

just really looking back, looking back on who i AM who I WANT to be truly. who i really want to be around and create

i valued my friendships

i was super creative... working on my book, investing in artistic pursuits.. 

i wanted to recreate everything i lost, i wanted to reclaim my trauma with that bitch.

i got to spend fun times with my friends, running around train tracks becoming closer again like how it should have been all along

jk had me looking forward to leaving to dubai

and so i did. 

i tried chasing him there but it didnt really work out

its not really meant to be sr...

he's just an inspiration for what you want and for who u are

the whole groups a blessing lol

even tho i left that shit cuz it got too much and too weird why bitches gotta make shit mediocre🙄

anyways dubai was kinda ass but i got to realize something important... who i miss, who i wanted/wished were with me, who actually cares about me..

WHO ACTUALLY CARES ABOUT ME

yo sr... if someone really cares.. they'll take the effort. STOP chasing people who don't care.. STOP damaging yourself and the people who love u for people who don't give a fuck

i dropped that bitch so hard i hope she fucking rots in hell

2017 . APRIL 2017 LAST TIME EVER I WILL EVER SEE THIS BITCH. NEVER AGAIN.

my life got so much better.

dubai was a detox but after i came back it was so good

hot as fuck

ramadan lol

fat as fuck -_-

dubai was just weird lol kinda realized its not my place but it was nice(ish)

need to learn not to rely so much on material shit lol

my family is the best

they really tryna teach u and care for u, u will never have another family.

also met nr!!! she was sweet kinda weird tho lMAO the cat shit jesus lol 

misk lol

WENT TO LONDON IT WAS AMAZING I LOVED IT

but fuck... lmao u know what the fuck u did yesterday -_- u DUMB bitch lmao who cares tho (...>_>)

came back... greeted by my friends who care 

chilled with them, adventures with them

but came back.. sorry. sorry to myself. sorry to the people i hurt

ayt, mh

i was thinking about it since winter i knew i had to make it right again, i knew i was wrong, that fucking bitch fucked shit up for us, we could have had so much memories in 2016 if shit didnt go sour

i gave the wrong person another chance they didnt deserve

so i reflected.. and swallowed my fucking pride

apologized. to who i needed to

and u know what? we good. like it was never bad. we good

...thats real. no flop shit, no fake shit, we good. loyalty. blessed.

u really gave the wrong bitch another chance u real did

stupid ass

then it was good.. adventures with my friends, rebuilding, forgetting, growing

together.

beach!! hiking!! badminton in the middle of the streets singing backstreet boys!! lol music!! 

KENDRICK LAMARRR

i made friends w ht again amazing lol

really remade friends w a lot of people lol

kendrick was so good tho fuck he was amazing my eyes were tearing/shining i cried like 5 times LOVE.. PRIDE. fuck those got to me

my ass saw get low live?? by YG fuck i love him too 

best night

amusement parks x3.. lol mtl with my fams..

yo me and lina got so close

i love my family. always.

NTCCCLMAOOOO 

they gave me so much hope after i dropped stb cuz or their weird ass fandom.. i couldn't deal with that shit they're ruining my damn nostalgia. but whatever I'm not gon hate on their success.. jk is still jk to me i hope he reaches the stars with his success

but yeah damn ntc made everything sooo good damn how u not have 1 dime but like 8 LMAO in one group

literally lights of my lifeee

jn😤jh😤hc🍅😩m😤jn😭jm😭WTF BITCH so much possibilities tf

love them they made me so happy

also their fandom is so funnny love the bitches i been following and talking to

anyways i saved up my money a lot but now its like all gone cuz nadas work so idk

UHMMMM I BOUGHT MMM??? WTF BITCH WTF

I WIN IDC I WIN fuck all these bitches

glow up glow the FUCK up

lost a lil weight.. probably gained it all back idk fuck me -.-

since fall 2017.. i been happy.. i got my friends..my groups..

rm, mc, ys💘 

nz,suz,lul,mar💖

prgl,sr,joan💞

hct!

nm💗

ayt

zainb,rame

xiny, jelly

and more...

hearts 4 all I'm just lazy lol

nice to have friends, nice to know there are people who actually like u and care for u and are fun to hang with, nice to know people like u for who u really are unconditionally 

nice to know bitches i hate will never NEVER have that

stay lonely pitiful boring unsuccessful and fake . 

priorities straight. emptying out ugly shit, rebuilding myself and who i am. having fun, fixing my look. investing

music music music GOOD MUSIC

movies movies movies

books books books

those 3 things will never change

unbrainwashing myself

realized so much shit.. istg my glow up is associated with freeing my mind from all this bullshit...

RATHER BE PROUD OF WHO I AM RATHER THAN TRY TO BE SOMETHING IM NOT JUST TO FIT INTO SOME LOWKEY RACIST UGLY BORING BULLSHIT

crazy how deep into my coma i was

BITCH IM BACK OUT OF MY COMA

going forward.. going forward.. investing.. changing... 

mentality shifting.. my image of diserable.. who i want to be 

better important goals, fun goals, fun shit, cool shit, new shit

destroying the fuck bitches who tried to kill me

bunch of fucking losers. 

I'm better now I'm happy now i ended 2017 happy as fuck

i DONT have my gl but i don't need him rn. I'm loved. i love me. my family and friends got me. so until i act on some long awaited shit and gain more resources and achieve more personally UNTIL I'm ready and deserve some shit. then ill get gl. I'm going towards him. 

you're with me.. even when you're away.

hope u feel all this happiness too, hope you're warm, hope you know I'm not where u are right now and hope ur working your way towards me too

ill meet u in the warm .

happy. i spent many nights happy no fights no drama no sadness (other than not having gl i get hopeless being in love with someone i don't know yet but i cant help it)

soon tho dw.. it 2018 now lol

anyways!! i grew so much in 2017 I'm back to who i really am I'm motivated I'm happy I'm inspired I'm ready for the next year

i ended this year losing my bitch ass acne studios scarf!! like a dumb bitch!! so I'm still a dumb bitch!! but who cares -.-

need so stop buying dumb shit.. ill get the trousers when i get a job and the fucking scarf won't matter.. yo ass don't even like scarfs wtf -_-

lool see this optimistic dgaf mentality.. 

CAASH DONT LAST MY FRIENDS WILL RIDE FOR ME

and thats exactly what we did tonight, dance and sing to disney hits and sean paul . happy and careless af 

I GOTTED WHAT I WANTED RIGHT NOWWW 

GOD DOES IT FEEL SO GOOOOD

2018 lets fucking go. I'm ready . I'm going to make so much shit. I'm out my coma, i know what the fuck i want . no more dumb shit, we do dis. LETS FUCKING GOOOO.