#it's crazy how all their interactions have a sense of normalcy now

[angelsanarchy]

Glass Houses: Jack Thurlow x Y/N Series CH 05 -> CH 06

"Didn't you say you had already befriended your neighbors daughter?" "I'd hardly call us friends. She doesn't know I'm crazy yet."

Tagging: @roryculkinluvr @thatsthewrongwallcraig @icarus-star @cc-luvr @madamemaximoff06 @shady-the-simp @quicksilversg1rl

"How is your sleep? Is it leveling out or are you still experiencing fatigue?" Jack stretched out in front of the computer screen and yawned.

"It's still weird. Some days I'm too exhausted to function. Other days I work my ass off to clear out the house but when I finally lay down, I just can't shut my mind off." Jack explained.

"What goes through your mind when you find yourself unable to sleep?" Jack rolled his eyes.

"Everything...nothing at all...I think about what I might do the next day or working on the book but then I'm too exhausted to even sit in the chair." Jack was growing annoyed with how his meds made him like a zombie. His brain was far too developed to not be able to use it during the day time.

"How about your appetite? Are you eating regularly?" Jack hated having to explain that he was miserable because his body required these meds to stay sane.

"Not as often as I should. Most of that is because I haven't done the grocery shopping yet. I have to put in an order." Jack listened to the hum come from the doctor.

"Have you thought about maybe going to the grocery store? Getting out among the people just to explore." Jack laughed.

"Yeah I'm not sure I have the energy for that. Maybe if I go late at night but I don't want to mingle just yet." Jack couldn't imagine having to walk through the grocery store having people stare at him or offer condolences that are empty and way too late. He wouldn't mind running into Y/n but that's a different story.

"Didn't you say you had already befriended your neighbors daughter?" Dr. Carty questioned making notes.

"I'd hardly call us friends. She doesn't know I'm crazy yet." Jack explained with a self deprecating laugh.

"You aren't crazy Jack. People live completely normal lives with mental illness. It's like any other illness and you are taking the steps towards a bit more normalcy." Dr. Carty had been with Jack since he checked into the facility. He felt like Jack absolutely needed to be hospitalized for the time he was in order to not only get to the root of his trauma but to allow his brain time to come to terms with it. He recognized all the progress he's made and wanted him to feel proud of that.

"Well how does it feel to interact with someone your own age who isn't a doctor?" Jack shrugged.

"She's fine. I mean we have a really cohesive sense of humor. I think if we did hang out, it wouldn't be awful but I'm pretty sure she's a nurse or something. She wears scrubs whenever she's not in regular clothes and when she's in regular clothes she's usually care-giving for her mom." Dr. Carty laughed making Jack tilt his head.

"You like her." He said confidently.

"What? No! We've had two conversations. That's hardly enough time to develop a liking to anyone." Jack defended.

"Haven't you ever heard of love at first sight?" Now Jack knew the doc was fucking with him.

"Yeah, thankfully I live in the real world. Plus everyone knows it's more like lust at first sight. No one can fall in love just seeing someone. That's based entirely on physical attraction." Jack was more of a pessimist when it came to love and attraction. Plenty of people could be attractive but love is few and far between. Jack can count on one hand how many people he's genuinely loved in his entire life.

"Well is she attractive?" Dr. Carty pressed.

"She's conventionally attractive, yes. I mean she hasn't cured my lack of sex drive but again, we've only spoken twice. I don't think I could fuck even if I wanted to." Jack had known the Doc for long enough that his random bouts of vulgarity didn't make him flinch.

"So you have decent conversation with a pretty woman who can match your intellect and has a dog you enjoy spending time with...She doesn't sound like an awful friend to make. Maybe you should work on that." Jack pushed away from the computer and ran his hands down his face.

"Why? I don't want to ruin anyone else's life. She's clearly a much better person than I am and she's already agreed to let me take the dog for walks on occasion so why risk ruining that with her getting to know me?" Jack genuinely feared letting anyone close at this point. Shanda had been with him since day one and the only person who has gotten a pass is the Doc and that wasn't something Jack asked for but has gotten used to.

"She's not Cleo, Jack." The mention of Cleo knocked the wind out of his chest.

"I know that." Jack whispered timidly before standing from his chair to move to the window.

"Just because you never received closure from her doesn't mean you can't move forward. You have done your part in taking accountability. We knew going into that you might not received the absolution of forgiveness." Dr. Carty himself had reached out to Cleo and was told she didn't care if Jack had dropped dead, she refused to talk to him after having their child cremated alone. Jack had sent a twenty page letter without any sort of response and when he sent a follow up, it was returned to sender.

The few times he dared to check social media, she had erased him from her entire existence. She had a memorial post for the baby but she didn't use his last name. When he accidentally liked one of her posts, he was met with a block on all outlets. Shanda had assured him that she had moved on and was doing better but he held onto that guilt for abandoning her after such a sudden miscarriage.

"What are you thinking Jack?" Doc's voice broke through his thoughts as he stood at the window. He could see Y/n down in her mother's garden watering the flowers and talking to her mom who was sitting in a wheelchair on the porch with Ace in her lap. He didn't need to know Y/n well to see she was a good person.

"The best thing she could do is to stay away from me. I'm just...I don't deserve that again. I wasted it the first time and ruined someone's life. What would I even do if I allowed myself to find that with someone else after Cleo? How do I explain to someone what I did to someone I loved enough to want to marry and start a family with?" Jack's ranting started to make his chest hurt.

"Jack, I want you to close your eyes and take a deep breath." Jack became annoyed but did as he was told counting in his head as he took a few deep breaths.

"You need to remember that we are not our mistakes. We all have flaws and blemishes but it's how we right our wrongs that define us. You are not a bad person." Jack opened his eyes feeling a slight burn from squeezing them so tightly. Jack let out a breath before digging in his pocket for a lighter, picking up a cigarette and opening the window abruptly. The daylight made it hard for his eyes to adjust at first but he didn't realize the sound of the window would draw any attention towards him. He was met with Y/n's gaze as he took a deep drag of his cigarette.

"You have to forgive yourself Jack. If you don't let go of that weight, it will drown you." Jack kept his eyes on Y/n as she smiled at him and waved. Jack returned a weak smile, biting his lip.

"I want to...I really do but I just don't think I can." Jack admitted out loud glancing over at the screen to see Dr. Carty was frowning. He hated ending his sessions on a such a negative feeling but he knew he was out of time today. He knew that Doc didn't want to leave him alone with these thoughts so he gave him self work to do over the weekend so it would keep him occupied. Self work always made him roll his eyes because he could knock assignments out easily but whenever he sat down to work on his writing, his mind would be blank. All he wanted to do was figure out how to feel normal again.

#Jack Thurlow #Jack Goes Home #Rory Culkin #Culkin Cult #Glass Houses #One Shot Series #5/38

[xiaq]

Why do feelings have to be so confusing???

I’ve never been super into labels, but if I had to choose I probably would have gone with aroace. I kind of figured I wouldn’t ever find someone I wanted to be in a relationship with and that was fine.

But now I’m 30 and somehow in a relationship for the very first time with this person that I love so much. And it’s wonderful and amazing in so many ways, but I also feel so crazy with it??

I feel like a teenager with their first crush but also too old for that and it’s like I don’t know how to trust myself in this because I’ve never felt anything close to this before.

Feeling romantic and sexual attraction for the first time there’s a part of me that’s like how has everyone been living like this the whole time??? It still doesn’t feel like it should be real somehow, even though I’m now experiencing it firsthand.

Anyway I don’t know exactly where I’m going with this, but if you either advice or even just stories to make me feel a little less ridiculous, I’d love to hear them!

I think it's really REALLY important to remember that socially reinforced ideas of normalcy when it comes to exploring sexuality are not, actually, normal. A. Because people are people and what works for one person doesn't work for others. While there's obviously going to be a bell curve on the graph of "when do people typically sort out who they want to kiss (or not kiss) and start doing that" there is going to be a steady, not insignificant, number of folks that are on the upward and downward swing of that bell curve before you even get to the far outliers, and that's to be expected. B. Traditionally accepted timelines for building a sense of sexual identity don't apply anymore. The average age for (first) marriage is creeping back each year. In the US in 1900 it was 26 for men and 22 for women. Now it's 29 and 27 respectively. Women, especially, don't have nearly the pressure placed upon them that they used to to quickly find someone who will take care of them seeing as we can now open bank accounts and own property and work for (mostly) equal pay and all that jazz. So there's that to consider.

But also. Humans, human bodies, are never stagnant. You might have heard the fun factoid that all our cells are replaced every 7 years. That's not entirely accurate, but it's true that the body does regenerate skin and bone and liver and stomach, and so on, cells at a kind of mind-boggling rate. There are things that we're born with that don't change like some of the neurons in our cerebral cortex, I think, but as a species we are generally made to adapt to new experiences and environments so much so that our bodies are in a constant state of change themselves. You're just...doing what you're built to do. Something new has happened and you're adapting to it.

And yes, it can be scary and make you feel very vulnerable when you don't have historical relationship or sex-related context like other people your age might have, but that's when you get to lean on friends and/or talk to your therapist to make sure you're approaching things in a healthy way, there aren't red flags you're missing, etc. Because humans are also pack animals and we thrive in communities in which we can share each others burdens and wisdom.

As someone who also had built what I thought was a pretty clear assessment of my romantic and sexual identity over 29 years, only to have it challenged and rebuilt at 30, I fully empathize with the way you feel. But I leaned into the feelings of confusion (and frankly, giddiness, at times). Who says teenagers are the only ones that get to experience first crushes? Who says 30 is too old for self-discovery? You get to decide how you interact with the world. Who cares what other people are doing if what you're doing makes you happy and hurts no one.

#no guilt in my pleasures #sexuality #hopefully this helps #answered asks #aroace

[gumclones]

As a fellow Chicle enjoyer, I must ask for your opinion on my biggest and most beloved crack ship of Chicle and Simon. They both went through the whole "being trapped inside your own head as a debased form of yourself to only then be freed from that state nearly 1000 years later in a world completely different from the one you knew, causing you to both long for the past whilst also resenting it," thing (I headcanon that the main reason Chicle went along with/followed Gumbald, despite being betrayed by him was because he genuinely did think of him and Lolly as his family and that by going along with Gumbalds craziness he could regain some of the normalcy that was in his previous life.) Plus, their personalitys seem like they would mesh really well together

first off, thanks for the ask! always nice to talk to another Chicle appreciator. gonna put the rest under a cut because I have lots of thoughts:

I'd never considered the ship before! I definitely think that interactions between Simon and any of the gum family would be great - partly because they've got so much in common with Bubblegum, someone to whom Simon was drawn because of her resemblance to Betty, and partly because of what you mentioned about how they all have experience being trapped with mental alteration for so very, very long. plus, as we've seen in Simon Petrikov, after getting de-crowned Simon goes to the same tavern that Punch Bowl and Crunchy were seen at, so there's definitely opportunity for them to meet and bond.

there's an interesting difference between the gum family's situations and Simon's - while the crown actively pulls its wearer into the shape of Gunther's impression of Evergreen, the dum-dum solution seems to mainly have effects on awareness, demeanor, and memory. Simon draws a very sharp distinction between the Ice King and himself, while Gumbald treats his time as a punch bowl as a painful period of his own life and refers to Crunchy as Chicle to no protest from Crunchy or Lolly. Chicle in particular seems to have kept a lot of his sense of self as Crunchy, as shown in The Pajama War and The Dark Cloud. this perspective might help Simon out quite a bit - I have a lot of feelings about the amount of transformation in Adventure Time and how it affects identity. (relatedly, I think both of them should get to hang out with Sweet P!)

I think that Chicle and Lolly's reasons for allying with Gumbald are definitely multifaceted. their familial bond definitely factors into it - we see that on top of doing reconnaissance/sabotage work like in Marcy and Hunson Chicle has completed a lot of paintings for Gumbald's base, which seem to be done completely voluntarily, as when he runs away from working on the horse painting for fear of the base getting breached, Gumbald doesn't punish him or even look annoyed. there's also the way that Gumbald looks angry when Jake splashes Chicle with the dum-dum solution harmless contents of the celebration bucket, his sad expression when speaking with Crunchy, and his sending Crunchy away from the battlefield to safety.

I think that there's also an aspect of practicality - after all, when they first got reverted at the end of Skyhooks II they had literally nobody else but each other. even if nobody but Bonnie knew what they looked like, they still look so much like her that they'd be sure to grab attention if they went out undisguised. and Chicle does mention a "secret goal [to] never die" in Gumbaldia, so he must have decided that Gumbald and Lolly had the best shot of helping him attain that goal.

and now I'm thinking of the interactions that they could have, since I think they'd shake out differently depending on which form they'd be in. Chicle seems a lot more openly insecure about how he's perceived than Crunchy does - he's defensive about his laugh, for instance, and he cracks jokes almost compulsively - the mime comment, the "high standing" joke, the "oops, was that bad" taunt - and he’s intensely ashamed when he gets juiced. I'm not sure how Simon would react to that, to be honest, but I think the Ice King would be very validating - my mental image is kind of based on the Ice King's friendship with Abracadaniel. Crunchy's not devoid of insecurity - he looks very offended about being called "the new Cinnamon Bun" - but he seems to channel that into ruthlessness. this would make for really entertaining Ice King interactions and with Simon… well, I think that Betty's ruthless side is one of the things that Simon loves about her! also, on a more serious note, I think that if we're specifically talking about interactions that take place during the Fionna and Cake time period, Crunchy would be able to give Simon hope. after all, even though getting turned back into a candy person was something Chicle was terrified of, we see that he's still living well (and alive 1000+ years later, to boot. keep it up king at this rate you really will never die)!

again, thank you for the ask! I salute you in your shipping endeavors 🫡

#404 shity name not found #Adventure Time #Chicle #Simon #Ice King #gum family #ask

[insulationsun]

What if Anne, Steven, and Kris met?

that would be absolutely nuts i should draw that.

in all seriousness theyre such a strange combo, i think anne and steven would become pretty fast friends. at least, depending on what age they meet. im gona set kris aside for now since theres no timeskip for them currently.

but like, 13 year old anne is a very different person- she's kind of flippant? doesnt take things very seriously, and hates responsibility. but she's also very social, and quickly connects with people even if she doesnt realize it. i do think they would get along, at least superficially. (her and 13 year old steven)

but steven is sort of the opposite- at least in that he feels he is responsible for a lot of things he really shouldn't be. in the beginning of the show he's sorta like anne in not taking things seriously- but he leans into that responbility a bit too much; meanwhile, anne sort of lets it fall to the wayside until she can't ignore it anymore. he's also a lot more open about his feelings, which 13 year old anne pushes down to a fault. i think that friendship would be good for the both of them, as steven would probably be very obviously hurt by something she's done, and also be very emotionally vulnerable in a way that surprises her. probably makes her want to be able to do the same thing.

i also think he'd help her like, learn how to be a good friend? steven has really good ideas about companionship in the beginning of su, sworn to the sword is a good episode to point to. there's emphasis in being a team, and doing things together. making each other happy. think there's value in that. and in turn, i think anne could help steven sort of understand being human more? since she attends school, and talks to a lot of people. anne knows a thing or two about interacting with others which would be a great help.

kris wouldnt really fit into this dynamic as well, considering theyre like in high school? (i know some people hc kris as being 14- i am not one of them, they seem a bit more mature than that but thats just me!) but being a sort of weird sibling to them both would be fun. i really don't think kris knows how to take care of other people, especially ones younger than them. they're sort of like an awkward silent buffer inbetween them, occasionally breaking up spats or silly arguments? anne would probably be annoyed or amused at how weird they are, while steven would kind of think they're cool and stoic? that's all i got on that though.

ok here is where we get crazy. under the cut because i've talked too long. warning for tangents.

ok so. timeskip versions. sort of. im not doing adult anne here, but i'm being a bit speculative of her high school years. this would probably put kris as the youngest, depending on how you headcanon them. (personally i hc them as 16, so same age as steven- so i'll just be using that age.)

so kris is not very good with people. good thing steven isn't either! or even anne a bit! (though, i think anne is the best at social interaction out of these three.) but each of them have gone through some sort of experience that sort of shaped them? in this way, it is difficult to sort of jump back into normalcy when you've traumatized or affected in such a big way. and though deltarune isn't finished, there are circumstances which are going to change or shape kris in new ways.

i think there would be hesitance in their interactions, nervousness which doesn't fully make sense to them. though it is something kris has sorta dealt with even before the events of deltarune, so i think they're more than used to having one-sided, awkward interactions with others. i actually think the other two would sort of follow their lead here- despite them being selectively mute. kris would initiate topics of conversation simply by being curious, or off-putting. (for example, maybe they stare a little too long, prompting someone like steven if they are okay.)

just little things like that. it would be painfully awkward.

especially as i think anne and steven are both characters that don't particularly like dealing with silence, or stilted conversation. and they would latch onto anything to talk about, no matter how trivial. so it's sort of like that! and kris can be content with sitting by and letting the conversation play out.

but i also think kris is sometimes not content with that- i think their dark world form is sort of a manifestation of kris wants for themself. i think they enjoy playing the hero, being out of the shadows for once. having the spotlight on them. it's something steven doesn't particularly enjoy, especially for how traumatizing his experience was to become savior of the galaxy. it's a title he finds uncomfortable. not that he would take back anything he's done-- it's all good things. but- the attention, and especially the treatment he gets (being put on a pedestal) is not very fun.

i want to touch on this briefly since we're here as well. i do think the biggest contribution to steven's issues is that it's rare that he faces true consequences for his actions. i think because of this title, as well as some of his powers makes it so that he can undo most of his bad actions. this is especially apparent when he shatters jasper. she harbors no ill will towards him- she submits to him, even.

and because everyone he's wronged has also, arguably done things just as bad as him, it's not something held against him. at least on a larger scale (of course characters like aquamarine and eyeball are exceptions). but his loved ones just want what's best for him, which makes sense. he's not doing okay in future, and there isn't much time for everyone to worry about his bad actions at that very moment.

though i do think after the events of i am my monster, they have a discussion about it. it sucks that it was cut short because the ramifications of steven shattering someone when pink diamond didn't even do that is crazy. he's probably done the worst damage out of the three here and i'm sure it does his ptsd no favors.

this is really long winded but the point im trying to make is that i think steven wants a bit of a break from taking the reigns- on anything. i think he's at a point where he doesn't really trust himself with others very much yet, let alone in emotions. and especially for other humans. so i think if he's able to get over the sort of awkwardness present here he would be able to enjoy just sitting in silence with kris.

as for anne- i do think she's well adjusted. i think she has a newfound confidence in herself that wasn't there before amphibia, and overall she sees her experience in amphibia quite differently than steven's journey or kris's current predicament. that said- i do think she would be going through a bit of a post-amphibia depression. losing her frog found family still occasionally feels like a punch to the gut, and being 16 i think it would come up rather often. maybe she would be in moods that make her very mopey and demotivated. she would bounce back, but its still somewhat of a fresh wound. but i think she turns some of her sadness into motivation sometimes. she would be motivated to study amphibians, to learn more about the species she holds so dear.

this kinda neatly matches with my previous ramble, in that anne actually understands what college is. which intrigues /both/ steven and kris. i'm sure they would love to learn all about that, especially since asriel and connie are doing basically the same thing. thought that was fun. she talks about college apps, asks them both about frogs. of course, steven and kris both love amphibians, reptiles, etc. they're very into that. steven still cares a lot about wildlife and kris enjoys animals that are not looked upon favorably. there's a kinship in it.

eventually when everyone is comfortable with each other anne sort of seems the best fit to lead all of their conversations. it's not all one-sided, but steven enjoys not having to speak sometimes, and it's not something kris really does. but anne and steven sorta learn to read their body language and other actions they perform to express their thoughts. kris is also expressive with their facial expressions. i think they would both respect kris enough to allow them ample room to express themself, without putting words or feelings into their mouth. (which i assume many monsters in hometown do.)

out of the trio, i don't think many would be forthcoming with their circumstances or experiences. they all seem to be characters sort of moving past those huge events in their life, bar kris since at this moment in time they're still dealing with their issues regarding the soul. which i'm sure would be insane to anne and steven, as they sorta gotta jump back into roles they thought were long gone by now.

i wonder if kris's possession would be sort of a relapse for steven? as in, he slots back into this helper role, assuming way too much responsibility for something that isn't even his fault? or perhaps he would be more mellow about it, there to support kris and do his best to help, without trying to do so much on his own.

and anne would be able to offer support in her own ways as well, a little rusty from her last adventure but she knows how to wield a sword. i don't think she would want kris to get hurt. it would haunt her.

imagine the three of them going to a dark world together ahsfksdfks. they would look awesome.

and since i like to believe the dark world reflects what you want to be/appear as, thinking about how they would look is really fun...

steven sort of being in that healer passive role would be neat. would give him a much needed break. and anne as a sort of tank, taking a loot of hits before she goes down. she has a lot of confidence in her own abilities now. and of course kris; still the leader, the knight directing everyone. something like that. that was on the fly.

the experience would be invigorating to anne, but probably super stressful for steven? until they get more comfortable that is.

and- i don't want to discount trauma anne has from amphibia. because she definitely does, and there's a lot of little things that would set her off the same way it would steven. i just think she has a bit of a better view of her time in amphibia than steven does with his whole thing. her last memories are bittersweet, while steven's last memory is like....i am my monster. ashdfksdg. i think his own actions haunt him more than hers. though i'm sure she still has regrets over what happened to sasha and marcy, like blaming herself for so many things that aren't really her fault. she probably falls back into old thinking patterns, back when she knew she didn't love herself.

and these are all characters that actively deal with self-deprecating thoughts about themself. not that it's like that all the time but yknow what i mean. it's a process, some days are worse than others. you get it. they help each other in the only ways they know how.

er..though i'm not sure how much of kris would reach them.

thats a depressing thought to end on.

#asks #sorry this is. insane. #there are probably repeats of certain ideas/concepts #sorry about that. i answered this in a stream of consciousness #so i didn't really go back and re-read what i wrote #must make it clear that i love all three of these characters. very much. #i'm a bit rusty on anne; its been a while since ive talked about her. forgive me for that

[bloompompom]

Puzzles - Chapter 14

Completed, multi-chapter fic (14/24)

Want to start from the beginning? Find Chapter 1 here.

Pairing: eren jaeger x female reader

Word count: ~5.2k

Chapter summary: an accidental slip-up ends up being exactly what was needed

Content warnings throughout this fic: explicit sexual content, explicit language, alcohol/drug use. reader discretion advised.

Here’s the not-so-fun part. It was the routinely familiar part where you would even try to begin to figure out what was going on between you and Eren. After all this time, you still couldn’t place your finger on it.

To think, you thought this would have been neatly sorted out after the evening spent at his parents’ house just a few weeks ago.

Fat chance.

Really, it was becoming utterly ridiculous at this point. You spent practically all your free time with Eren, doing nonsense like baking crappy brownies and watching dumb movies that you had seen at least a million times. It seemed so platonic – almost to a painful degree because you wanted there to be more. More than just the fleeting instances in which that friendly facade was shattered to bits.

It was like the two of you would let the pressure build until it was no longer bearable. Only then would you allow for a small release. It was comparable to letting the air slowly slide out of a balloon that was ready to burst. And once just enough pressure was relieved, things would return to that weird sense of normalcy you created.

You often wondered if this was sustainable. It was more than likely that there would be a time when this tension would finally cause the balloon to pop in your complacent faces.

When that pressure begged for release, it was always Eren that initiated it (surprise, surprise). These passing interactions were no longer limited to when it was just the two of you. That would be too easy. Now, it was happening even when you were in the company of your friends. Eren would manage to weasel his way into getting you alone, even if it were just for a moment.

Something within Eren would snap. It would be as if he couldn’t let another second go by without having you pressed up against him. Sometimes it was the way the collar of your blouse would hang just a little too low and expose the plump skin of your cleavage. Other times, it was much more unpredictable. More than ever, it was the ordinary moments that had him entirely smitten with you, and those instances were no longer few and far between.

For example, Eren recently found himself enamored by the sight of you getting invested in a video game. He couldn’t even remember the game now – he only focused on how you paused the game to corral your hair into a ponytail. The swift ease of your movements and the excitedly-determined look on your face was humiliatingly irresistible to him.

On these occasions, Eren would wait for you to excuse yourself to the bathroom. He would ‘coincidentally’ make up some sorry reason to leave the room, too. Once he had you away from prying eyes, he would steal wanton kisses from you. Some of them were innocently short – merely a peck while he strolled past you. Then there were the times when you would suddenly find your back pushed against a dark hallway wall with his hands roaming your body with pure recklessness.

Eren knew these instances drove you crazy in more ways than one. Not only did you want each kiss to last longer, but they always left you feeling like a shameful mess when you returned to your friends. And without fail, he would leave you standing in the hallway, desperately craving more, with nothing more than a wicked smile on his face.

But, hey, at least he was actually kissing you now.

You knew it was only a matter of time until your friends figured out what was going on. They weren’t stupid. If anything, they had already put the pieces together. You knew Sasha had suspicions about you and Eren, especially regarding the infamous night you shared on her squeaky air mattress. And Eren knew that Armin could never keep a secret. It was inevitable that he would soon blab about Eren’s confession. On top of all that, you were the one that slipped up to Connie about kissing Eren.

You two had managed to leave quite the trail of breadcrumbs, hadn’t you?

Of course, today was one of those excruciating days where you could sense the pressure was becoming too much. It was demanding for any smidgen of release.

“Do you have to go tonight?” Eren asked. You had spent the entire day with Eren, and he was somehow still saddened when it was time for you to leave. You found it a tad bit endearing.

You looked into the mirror, past your reflection, and saw Eren in the doorway to your bathroom. He leaned against the frame with his arms crossed. He wore an over-the-top pout to match.

You continued to fiddle with the clasp of your earring when you said, “I promised I would go last week. I can’t just skip out on a birthday dinner.”

Eren had patiently waited while you took your time getting ready to meet some of your friends. Maybe ‘friends’ was a bit of an overstatement. You preferred to think of them more as acquaintances. Anyway, you hadn’t seen any of them since the night of Sasha’s party. The night you left early after drinking way too much. The night you first met Eren.

“How do I look?” you asked while you twirled to face Eren. You held your arms out to display your outfit, shimming in place for him.

The way he looked you up and down made you feel nervous and excited all at once. His frown quickly curved into a smile. It was cute, and it only had you wanting to push the reaction further. You paraded around until you finally pulled that famous chuckle from him. He always found your silly dances to be painstakingly charming. He would never admit that, though.

He took a step closer, taking you in by the waist as you spun your way over to him. His hands squeezed at your sides. “Beautiful as ever, babe.”

It wasn’t often that Eren called you anything but your name. Strike that – sometimes he would call you annoying, but that was different. His pet names for you never slipped out by accident. You could feel the intention behind the words he chose, and it never failed to make you swoon.

You left a peck on his cheek before leaving the bathroom. It wasn’t something you typically did, but you couldn’t help yourself. Remember that balloon? It was more than ready to pop.

You could hear Eren’s footsteps behind you as you made your way down the hall. Without turning to look at him, you asked, “What are your plans for the night?”

“Probably playing video games with Armin.”

“Sounds like a wild night.”

“Would you rather I say I’m going to sit outside your front door and wait for you to come back?”

“Yeah. I think that’s only fair,” you said with a laugh. You picked up your purse that hung from the back of a dining chair and set it on the table. You placed a few more things inside before zipping it shut to sling over your shoulder.

“Do you want a ride? I can drop you off on my way home,” Eren offered.

“Sure. Thanks.” You bent down to slip on your shoes. The two of you left your apartment, and you locked the door behind you. You gave the knob a gentle tug to ensure it locked. “Are you able to give me a ride home then, too?”

“Only if that means I can stay the night.”

“I guess that’s okay.” You looked over your shoulder to flash a grin at Eren as you bounded down your apartment building’s steps. “There’s always a catch with you, isn’t there?”

“Always.”

During the drive, you complained about how you really didn’t want to go, and Eren tried to convince you to stay in for the night. Maybe it was the lighthearted banter, or it could have been just how comfortable you felt with Eren after spending the entire day with him. But the ‘why’ of the situation didn’t really matter. You had already started to speak before your brain could catch up with the gravity of what you were saying. It was becoming quite a nasty habit of yours.

“Well, at least this gives me a chance to show off my boyfriend,” you said. You almost laughed at your joke before you realized what you spoke into existence.

Boyfriend.

That fateful, damning word left your lips, and you immediately felt a wave of panic wash over you. You knew there was nothing you could say or do to play off the situation. You had backed yourself into a corner. Your head snapped in Eren’s direction, and you were completely pale in the face while you waited for his response.

He raised an eyebrow, coyly peeking over at you. “Boyfriend, eh?” A smile crept across his lips, and he turned his attention back to the road ahead. “I like the sound of that.”

“Really?” You were entirely surprised by the casualness of his voice. You could have sworn he was going to tease you mercilessly, but this – this was unexpected.

While Eren appeared easygoing, his insides were a completely different story. He expertly masked the twisting feeling that sat low in his stomach – the feeling started the very moment you did that stupid, little shimmy for him in the bathroom. He couldn’t pinpoint what it was, but when the word ‘boyfriend’ accidentally escaped you, the feeling only pulled tighter at him.

“Sounds nice when it comes from your pretty lips.” His statement oozed with sex. It was the only way he knew how to cover up all those gushy feelings inside of him.

You felt that annoying desire of yours start to pool within you. That balloon had floated back into your head. It was pleading with you to release some air.

You shoved that feeling down. “Seriously, Eren.”

Eren thought over the countless hours he had spent mustering the strength to ask you out. Sometimes he would be of the ‘fuck it’ mentality, ready to march over to your apartment to get the damn thing over with. But he always heard Mikasa’s words drilling in his head, telling him it was for the best that he didn’t take things any further.

But all of that was for nothing. All of those restless nights. All of those harebrained plans that he had devised. None of it mattered now. You managed to define the relationship in such an effortless manner. Sure, it may have been by accident, but somehow it felt right, considering how everything has worked out between the two of you. Seeing you slip over your words and turn into a blushing fool beside him – it was just so perfectly you. It made the moment feel even more special to Eren in an embarrassing, sentimental way. Add that to the list of things he would absolutely never admit.

“Why are you surprised? This was sort of inevitable, right?” He was still doing his best to come off as collected as possible. “I thought my humiliating confession made things pretty clear.”

Was it really inevitable? It certainly didn’t feel like it. Everyone around you consistently talked on and on about the fact that Eren had never seriously dated before. Hell, even his own mother had brought this to your attention. Why should you have assumed he would change now?

“I don’t know,” you said. “To be honest, I thought I might have dreamed that up. You know, since you never mentioned it again.”

Eren looked over at you with a tight-lipped smile. It was one of his expressions you could actually read: the ‘I’m sorry’ face.

The tell-tale sign that it was coming was when you would watch his mouth press into a firm line, creating that signature expression. It was a cop-out of an apology for the times he didn’t want to say the words (which was most of the time). One way or another, it always worked out for him.

You learned about this pathetic face because of his frequent arguments with Mikasa. It was almost scary how they could communicate without saying a single word. She would shoot him her classic, dagger-eyed look whenever he made an idiot of himself. All he would have to do was make that tight-lipped smile, and she would ease up.

Like you said, it always miraculously worked out for him. Even with you. And that was why you let him off the hook and decided against pushing the matter further.

“The light’s green,” you pointed out. Eren finally stopped making The Face. You paused and tried to think of a way to lighten the dampening mood. “If we’re going to date then what’s the catch this time?”

“Hm, I’ll have to think about that,” he said. You rolled your eyes, and he started to laugh at his own joke.

All this time, you wondered what your relationship with Eren was, and now the answer was smacking you straight across the face. The bitch slap of the century.

You arrived at the restaurant, and it didn’t take long for you to notice a few of your acquaintances huddled outside the entrance. Eren’s car ripped through the parking lot, all the way to the front of the building. You reached for the car door’s handle once he pulled up to the sidewalk. Before you opened it, Eren grabbed your thigh to catch your attention. You glanced over at him only to be met with that familiar, boyish expression you had grown to both love and hate.

He shifted the car into park. “You wanted to show me off, yeah?”

Eren didn’t let you answer. He just opened his door and walked around the front of the car. You sighed only out of habit. Really, you were uncontrollably smiling while you watched his delighted eyes stare back at you through the windshield. As much as you enjoyed his overattentive nature, you were very much aware that he was doing this just as much for himself, further feeding his already-inflated ego.

You stepped out of the car once he had opened the door for you. Once it shut, he cupped your cheeks and kissed your forehead. “Text me when you need me to pick you up, okay?”

“Okay.” You felt the burning remnants of his lips on your skin. You were already warm from all the eyes on you, but that only made things worse.

He returned to the driver’s side of the car and winked at you before getting back inside. He was clearly so pleased with himself that you couldn’t help but shake your head. That fact became more apparent to you once you turned and saw the looks on the girls’ faces.

“You didn’t tell us that you had a boyfriend.”

“Or that he was hot!”

Your grin was filled with a confusing mix of pride and embarrassment, especially as they continued their gossiping while you headed into the restaurant.

Boyfriend. There it was again. That word. Though you had already said it out loud, it strangely felt even better to hear it from someone else. It felt reaffirming in a way. They didn’t need to know he had only been your boyfriend for no more than ten minutes.

The birthday dinner ran later than you had expected. It dragged on, actually. The evening was filled with conversations you felt left out of since you didn’t really hang out with them. It made you question why you were even there and caused you to spend more money on drinks than you wanted to.

You were grateful that Eren was just as eager to get you out of there. His timing was impeccable. He was already parked out front by the time you stepped outside. The car sped off before you could even buckle into your seat.

You chuckled. “Happy to see me?”

“Of course I am.” His eyes flickered from your face to the black styrofoam container on your lap. You were always one to share leftovers with him. “Also a little excited about that.”

“You should be,” you said, shaking the box lightly. “I got an extra order of my dinner for you. A 'thank you' for giving me a ride.”

“Oh, hell yeah. I’ll drive you around more often, for sure.”

Back at your apartment, you sat with Eren at the table while he ate his meal. Your conversation wandered through each of your nights. Just as Eren predicted, he and Armin spent their evening playing online video games with Connie and Jean. Eren attempted to explain a funny story between bites, but it was definitely more of a had-to-be-there moment. It didn’t matter, though. You just enjoyed listening to him make himself laugh.

Toward the end of his dinner, you let out a yawn as you checked the time on your phone.

“Tired already?” Eren asked.

You stood up from your chair and stretched. “Yeah. I think I need to get ready for bed.”

Before you knew it, Eren took you by the hand and tugged at you. You gasped as you lurched forward, clumsily trailing behind him all the way to your bedroom. He only released his grasp on you once he stepped into the room.

“What’s gotten into you?” you asked with a giggle. You remained in your bedroom doorway and watched Eren jump onto your bed with a loud thud. The bedframe shuddered beneath his weight. You held your breath, anxiously waiting to ensure the feeble piece of furniture didn’t give out.

“What? I can’t be excited to spend the night with my girlfriend?”

You playfully let your head drop to the side and let out a scoffing laugh. You started to walk toward him. He splayed out across the blankets with his arms tucked behind his head. He had clearly made himself comfortable.

He eyed you once over with a tempting stare. “And damn, does she look good.”

He swiftly sat up and returned his feet to the floor. He picked you up by the waist and placed you on top of him. Your legs draped over his lap while his hand rested on the small of your back to hold you upright. His other hand found your chin and brought your face closer to his. He sprinkled kisses across your face and down your neck.

Your crinkled your nose at the tickling sensation. You giggled and started to shy away. “Stop! It tickles!”

Eren’s adoration for you completely consumed him. Not once had he ever felt so giddy over the mere sight of someone. It was just as plain as day to you, too. He had a look on his face like he had the world beneath his fingertips, and you felt the same. You were happy that you were finally his.

His kisses caused that nagging desire to swelter in your stomach. You shuffled around in his lap, sliding one of your legs to the opposite side so you could straddle him. You sat tall as you shifted your weight onto your shins. You looked down at him with your hands on each of his shoulders, your eyes scanning over his green ones.

Before he could speak, you put your lips to his. Softly, at first, and only for a moment. Then you started to kiss the side of his face and down his neck. His skin felt warm against your lips.

You slid the collar of his shirt out of the way, and you could smell what remained of his cologne after a long day mixed with his own scent. It was inviting and familiar, and you delighted in it. He let out breathy exhales when your mouth made its way up to his ear. You nibbled at his lobe, causing his body to jolt underneath you.

He started to say your name, but he was interrupted by the feeling of your hand running up his stomach to his chest. You tugged his shirt as you did so, balling the fabric up tightly in your grasp. You sat back to yank it over his head, throwing it behind you.

You settled your hands onto his chest that was now on display for you. Your tongue swiped over your bottom lip before you leaned forward to pepper more kisses across his skin. You were slow, taking all the time that you needed to ensure not a single spot went neglected.

Eren’s hands held onto your hips. He gripped the flesh between his fingers, and it felt like his fingerprints would be seared into your skin. You noted how his hold would tense when your tongue found the delicate nook of his collarbone. He craned his neck back to give you more space to continue.

He reveled in the feeling of your touch, savoring the softness of your lips against him. Even in the few seconds that it took for your mouth to find its next site, he found himself missing you. He felt so weak and truly pathetic for it.

You could feel his pulse beneath his skin and the way his breathing grew more ragged. If your kisses alone were doing this to him, you couldn’t begin to imagine the sounds you could pull from him with more. Just the thought caused pleasure to swarm around in your stomach.

You were beginning to lose yourself. You couldn’t resist lowering yourself onto him. He felt hard against you, his length pressing through his sweatpants and nicely against your clit. The pressure elicited a whimper from you. Your body impulsively began to grind into him.

You brought your lips back to his, kissing him in such a way that you couldn’t believe you were the one controlling your mouth. It was messy, needful, and nothing close to romantic, but your heart still continued to swell into your throat.

Eren was dizzy from the feeling of you getting off on him. He could feel your hips start to stutter. With his hands still digging into your sides, he pushed and pulled your waist to drag you over him. He couldn’t help but rut against you further, searching for any sense of relief.

You stayed like that for a bit, completely wrapped up in pawing at each other like a couple of teenagers. You swallowed each other’s depraved noises, savoring the sounds as if you would never hear them again.

But you still needed more. You wanted Eren to become that whiny, whimpering mess you were envisioning. So you broke from his grasp, finally able to draw in a breath of air for the first time since you locked lips.

There was no need to tease or kiss your way down. There was no point in delaying the inevitable. You simply dropped to the floor and landed on your knees, nestling yourself between his thighs. You ran your fingers along his stomach, just above the spot where his skin met the waistband of his sweats. You slid the tips of your fingers just underneath the fabric.

With your face at the same level as his hips, you beamed up at him through your long eyelashes. His face alone told you that your demure expression was really doing it for him. The sight of you, on your knees before him, between his legs, practically begging for permission to remove his pants – it was perfectly lewd.

You watched his chest tighten. His dark eyes glossed over the wondrous view in front of him. You adored the way he looked at you, like you were the only thing that mattered right now. Knowing that you had this effect on him made you feel more than desirable. Maybe you even felt a bit powerful.

Eren lifted his hips from the bed and helped you pull down his sweatpants and boxers. His length sprung forward, now standing proudly before your face.

“Well, I don’t want to be the only one who’s naked,” Eren raspily said, his voice breaking into a small laugh.

You looked up to see his face. It was flushed with lust, a beautiful pink decorating the skin under his eyes and the bridge of his nose. He bent forward and took the bottom of your shirt between his fingers. He pulled it over your head with little effort and threw it in whatever direction. You reached around to undo the clasp of your bra. It joined the assortment of clothes in the corner of the bedroom.

“Your pants, too.” The sudden firmness in his voice led you to obey without question. You sat up further into your knees and unbuttoned your jeans. You shifted your hips back and forth, wiggling yourself free from the denim.

“I’m only slightly disappointed by the lack of lacey, red underwear,” he joked.

You let out an unamused huff and continued pulling your pants past your ankles. Once they were off, you returned to your kneeling position, now dressed in just your boring, black underwear.

Eren’s right hand was already wrapped around himself, lazily sliding up and down while he watched you undress. His other hand found the place where your jawline met your neck. He brought you close, leaning in to kiss you. As his tongue slipped past your lips, you replaced his hand with your own. You stroked him, and he groaned into your mouth. He sat back again, arms extending behind him with his palms pushed into the mattress to prop himself up.

You continued to pump, repositioning yourself on your knees so you were ready to take him into your mouth. You watched his eyes shut tightly when your lips met his tip. The feeling alone caused his head to loll back with a deep sigh. You left wet kisses down his length before licking your way back to the top.

“Please,” he breathed. He was reduced to that needy mess you hoped for, completely giving himself up to you.

And who were you to keep the poor guy waiting? The shakiness of his voice only encouraged you, and you plunged him into your mouth. Expletives began to spill from him as you bobbed your head. You inched lower with each movement until the tip of your nose pushed against his pelvis.

You heard a sharp breath from him once he felt himself at the back of your throat. His fingers found the back of your head, raking your hair into his fist in a make-shift ponytail. He couldn’t stop himself from starting to thrust into you, the pace now entirely under his control.

Seeing him lose himself in you only heightened your arousal. You were high off the idea that you were the one giving him this pleasure as you tried your hardest not to gag. You resisted the temptation to let your hand leave his body to satisfy the growing ache between your legs.

After a few more bucks of his hips, Eren noticed that your eyes were snapped shut. Your nails had left little crescent moon imprints on the tops of his thighs.

“Are you alright?” He removed himself from your mouth, fearing that he may have been too rough with you. He caught your cheek in his hand.

“Yes,” you said through gasps. He had nearly squeezed your cheeks together. “I’m good. Don’t worry.”

He scrutinized your expression for any signs of distress. An embarrassing string of saliva still connected your mouth to his tip. Your makeup had begun to smudge under your eyes, sending faint trails of black down your face. You smiled up at him, your eyes filled with reassurance, your cheeks and lips stained with a hue that was even rosier than usual.

“God, you look so pretty like this,” Eren murmured, running his thumb across your cheek.

He watched a stray strand of hair that lay across your face. It quivered in tune with your sporadic and heavy breaths. He brushed it out of the way, tucking it behind your ear before leaving a lingering peck on your forehead. He leaned back on the bed, further than last time, and rested his weight on his elbows.

Your tongue darted past your lips, and you brought your mouth back to him. You gently licked around the head in a teasing manner.

“Does it feel good?” you coyly asked, knowing that you weren’t about to give him the chance to answer before taking him back into your mouth.

He had trouble forming words. He only shuddered, letting out an unholy mashup of ‘mhm’ and ‘oh god’ to answer your question. You were smart enough to know that it meant you were doing a fairly decent job.

You used your hand to pump in rhythm with your mouth. He was slippery with your spit, and your fingers loosely glided around the base. His breathing fell into tempo with each of your sucks.

“Fuck,” he groaned between clenched teeth. “Just like that.”

You brought your attention to his face. His eyelids were screwed shut, his features twisted in pleasure. You let out an unbridled moan when you watched his jaw fall, feverish breaths now pouring from him.

Your impure sounds had him nearly seeing stars. He opened one of his eyes to look down at you while you continued to take him in your mouth. Your watering, pathetic gaze was too much for him to handle.

“W-wait,” he panted. He weakly tried to sit up. “Baby, if you keep going – shit – like that, I’m gonna–”

The release he was attempting to avoid interrupted him. His fingers gripped the roots of your hair even tighter than before, sending a burning sensation throughout your scalp. You felt his come coat the back of your throat. He erratically jerked deeper into you, grunting and cursing as he did so.

You swallowed once he pulled out. You used the back of your wrist to dry the spit around your mouth. He started down at you with a shocked, slack-jawed look on his face.

“Fuck!” He didn’t curse in satisfaction this time. He slapped his palm against his forehead. “I’m sorry.”

“What? Why?” You were entirely confused. You placed your hands onto his thighs and used them as leverage to hoist yourself onto the bed beside him.

“I wanted to have sex with you, not come during a blow job in, like, five seconds like a damn teenager.”

You couldn’t help but giggle at the fit he was throwing. Sure, you could admit that sex sounded nice – honestly, just the thought caused you to twitch in place a bit – but you tossed the idea aside for now.

“Eren, it’s fine.” You scooched up in your bed and fell against the pillows. You watched him get up and step into his sweatpants. “I was expecting – well, at least hoping – that you would finish.”

He stood in the corner of your room. He picked up his t-shirt and tossed it in your direction. You happily put it on while he continued his grumbling. “I just thought I had better restraint than that.”

“Guess I’m just that good.”

In defeat, Eren flopped onto your bed. You welcomingly held your arms open for him. He crawled his way between your legs and laid his head on your stomach. You wrapped your arms around his broad body, tracing your fingers along his skin until you reached his hair. You undid the tie that was fastened at the back of his head. Your fingers spread through his hair, taking brief moments to scratch at his scalp.

Eren sighed and finally relaxed into you. You continued to mindlessly play with his hair, and you felt his fluttering heartbeat start to return to its resting rate.

Apparently, it was just enough to bring him back to life. His lighthearted nature returned just in time to ruin the peaceful silence.

“So, I finally decided on that catch. I’ll only be your boyfriend if you do this every night.”

“Give you head?” you questioned.

“No!” He let out a small chuckle. “Well, maybe. But I meant the hair thing.”

“Every night?”

“Mhm.”

“Can I braid it, at least?”

“Absolutely not.” Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

#Eren x reader #Eren yeager x reader #Eren jaeger x reader

[ducknotinarow]

[2k12 uwu]

Casey was nervous, Hell, he was pretty sure he was more nervous about this entire thing that Raph was right now. They were in his room, Casey aware that his dad and sister were downstairs. He bit his bottom lip, gripped Raph's hand tightly,

"Yer sure yer cool with this?" Casey questions, "I can jus' make somethin' up so yer can run off yanno?"

It's not that Casey didn't want him to meet their dad, course he did. He just, didn't want an argument, or him to freak out or anything. Casey loved Raph with everything in him, and if their family didn't get along? It would hurt. He hated to admit it but he was scared of how this night may go down. Before Casey can try and find a reason out of this though, his dad called for them to come downstairs. He did, briefly, smile, when they said both their names and not just his own, but it was short lived. Squeezing Raph's hand, he stands up from his bed,

"Guess it's now or never huh?"

-

Casey kept Raph out of sight, just for a moment, until his dad was sat down and there was nothing in their hands. Sighing out, Casey smiled, nervously, grabbing Raph's wrist and tugging them into sight,

"Uh, dad, this is Raph, my boyfriend," Casey introduces them, "Raph, this is my dad..."

The look on Mister Jones face said it all. Eyes were wide, mouth parted in obvious shock. Angel merely smiled, happy to see Raph again. Casey held Raph's hand, as tight as he can. The silence is thick and awful. After a moment though, despite the tension, his dad speaks up,

"You're uh, a little different than what I expected Raphael."

Casey craved death.

"Well, go on, sit down yer two, dinner's gettin' cold."

Casey managed to get his feet to move, leading Raph closer, even being nice enough to drag out the chair for the Terrapin so they could sit down. Casey took his own seat, never letting go of Raphael, needing them to keep his grounded. The silence was back, food in the centre of the table, merely waiting for anyone to help themselves. It was awkward, clearly it was going to take a while for his dad to get used to this. God bless if they didn't try though,

"Sooo, Raphael," He begins, starting to dish some fresh lasagna onto the Terrapin's plate, "How long 'ave yer been a Turtle?"

Casey's head slammed against the table; this was just a terrible idea all over.

| Muse interaction continued from [here]

You know one thing Raph always liked when it came to knowing Casey? Which one might not think he could ever be or would be able to give someone? Was just a sense of normal that came with their friendship. Raphael couldn't ever explain that to anyone because well Casey was in all meanings of the word a freak. Not just any human paints their face like a skull and decides to fight crime. Casey was maybe weirder than any mutant in the city even, always grinning when a new gross mutant showed up. Going on about stuff being so metal. Casey had his own sense of what was cool to him. But it was the fact Casey was crazy that he could just befriend Raph like he did. Being a mutant never mattered to Casey.

Casey always just treated Raph like he was well Raph he guesses? He would text him back even when at school. Wanted to hang out heck even would invite Raph into his room sometimes. Not once did being a turtle ever seem to pop into Raph's mind even now as they sat on Casey bed, Raph sort of had to soak in the normalcy of nerves tangling up in his stomach right now. Over meeting Casey's dad. Racking that fact over in his mind over and over, aware of Casey's grip on his hand and how it tightens. Not to hold him more to likely settle their own nerves.

"Yer sure yer cool with this?"

Raph finally lifts his head to look at Casey when they ask. Mulling the question over himself, he knows what he said back on the roof. He was gonna have to at some point right? It just was bound to happen with how the two of them seemed so set on staying together as they were.

"I can jus' make somethin' up so yer can run off yanno?"

"No I'm fine." Raph answers a bit faster than he had wanted Raph knows Casey doesn't mean anything bad about trying to find him a way out of this if there's any second guessing going on right now. As he settles green eyes onto Casey's brown ones, it easy to read but kind of fascinating to see.

Seeing Casey like this was well just new. There was worry and fear in their eyes, and sure Raph had seen Casey scared or worried before but not like this. That usual air Casey had around him seemed to change direction as well, there was tension in how they held themself. Maybe Raph should have tried to find a sweater to wear for the night, before either of them could even try to speak they both turned attention out towards the door where Casey's dad voice. Raph guessed. Had come from simply calling out Casey and Raph's own name to come down stairs. There was something, nice about that. Once again he can feel Casey's hold on his hand grow tight on reflex he squeezes back. Not even for his own nerves but because well that just what he always did. Try and help Casey when they were in need of that. Moving his weight to his feet and he went to stand up along with Casey now.

"Guess it's now or never huh?"

"Come one since when is Casey Jones scared?" Raph teased just a little bit to help break some tension.

----

Raph had been in Casey's apartment before many times. To hang out with them, to spend time with Angel to give Casey a bit of a break even. He been here for Christmas even. He knew the way down Casey's steps yet he took them slowly as if he never took a step in this place before. Part of him wished he had a chance to ask someone anyone about what to do when it came to meeting your boyfriends dad because maybe something to go off would have helped him a little here? Casey's fingers slipped away from his hand the first time since getting here. And Now Raph only now sees that maybe that was for both of them and not just Casey. As he stands off to the side. Keeping hidden still. Jeez he couldn't recall a time he felt like this. It was like being sick and standing out in the middle of the sea all at once. balance off and wobbling, stomach twisting and turning. Well Casey took time to make sure his dad was ready? Raph wasn't really sure why then again yeah they might drop something or need to sit. Jeez this wasn't help. Not till he can feel the burn of Casey's hand grab on to his wrist easily tugged over by the scrawny one of them.

"Uh, dad, this is Raph, my boyfriend,"

Raph finally moves to look at Casey's dad, it's not the first time he ever saw them. Raph had seen them in photos before but even now Raph had to say Casey resembled his mom the most between them when it came to looks. It was all he could think as he stood frozen with it well finally know to all of Casey's family. Casey's dating a five foot tall turtle.

"Raph, this is my dad…"

Raphael watch their eyes widen as it seemed to finally settle on the guy that he was staring at a mutant, how their mouth parted not to speak but from the shock. Raphael had to say this was one of the better reactions he ever faced from a human seeing him at least. There were no screams or cries of him being a monster. So off to a decent start right? His gaze slightly drifts to where Angel sat, he smile was wide and bright, eyes nearly like crescents from how happy she seemed to see him. Raph can't help how his face soften at her free hand lifted to offer her a small little wave. Raph soon dropping it to put his focus back on to Casey's dad shit what do you say? Hello maybe stupid? He clams when Casey's palm is in his own once again.Fingers easily lace through Casey's five. As he clears his throat.

"Uh..h hey. Hello Mister Jones." Ugh he hated how stiff he sounded just now but what was he meant to do here! Slight aiming for how he is with Splinter well still trying to at least keep things formal he guesses? He called Splinter by a title mainly so he opted for that. Ugh this is all to much thinking for Raphael to put up with right now.

The silence was only growing thick around the four of them, really only Angel seemed unaware of the tension raising. Raphael knows he can feel it coming off Casey, and himself in bucket loads. Ironic considering how they tended to carry themselves normally. Uncaring of anything or anyone around them. Yet here they were standing hand in hand but from hos grips are coiling and body's go ridged it is clear neither of them is feeling comfortable in this very moment. Finally Casey dad speaks.

"You're uh, a little different than what I expected Raphael."

Raph can't help the laugh that rolled over his young just now, only to cover it with a cough as he held a hand to his beak to cover that. Looking off to the side suddenly finding the small random speck on the nearest wall to be the most interesting thing in the world to him. Even Raph couldn't explain why he did it. Maybe it was a nerves thing.

"Well, go on, sit down yer two, dinner's gettin' cold."

At the wording Casey seemed to take the initiative and drag Raphael along with himself over to the free chairs at the table, Raph eyeing the chair Casey stopped to pull out for him. If it was for what was going on he would have teased them for it, instead he simple sits. Grateful he could do that because he felt like he might fall over in this room. Raph could feel how Casey's grip on his head became like a vice grip. So he offered to rub his thumb of the back of Casey's very small hand. But it helped when he felt over the bony knuckles, and the gloves that Casey wore over the. You think with all Raph and his brothers have faced from Foot ninjas to kraang. Simply meeting his boyfriends dad would be a walk in the park. Yet he felt far more nervous and or so self aware. How easily a turtle stood out in this very room among three humans. Maybe the first time in Casey's home had he ever felt this way, that was just him being scared he felt this before. When he talked to Casey's mom. How he stared at the woman who gave birth to Casey, that cared so much for the boy Raphael loved with all his heart. Even now when it came to Casey dad. He had the same thought now he did then.

I want you to like me.

Not that Raphael could think of a reason they might not outside being a turtle but that didn't seem to phase him..to much or at least he was trying to not let it. Raph didn't mind one way or the other. Once more the adult in the room seemed to take charge of the situation and how odd that felt to Raph just now to think on the matter. When Casey's father spoke again.

"Sooo, Raphael,"

Listening to how the stretch out the word as they went and set food to his plate. So that's lasagna? sort looks like pizza? with noodles? He thinks that a noodle at least it rather flat why are you focusing on food right now idiot. Raph scolds before chancing his gaze to settle on Casey's dad. Reflex's taking over him as he silently shows they have his attention.

"How long 'ave yer been a Turtle?"

There was a sudden drop on the table Raph startled by it as he slight flinched and turned attention to Casey. They had let their face fall to the table. Once again Raph's beak slightly curls in the corner into a faint smile that said it all. Idiot. Was Casey embarrassed just now?It's kind of cute, odd to more of that fascinating sense coming over Raphael. He so used to seeing Casey as he dose that seeing Casey as he was a kid, going through the embarrassing dinner of introducing his boyfriend to a parent? well Raph wasn't sure what to make of that in all truth but it did help him a little before he turns to look back at Casey's dad.

"uh my whole life?" was how Raph chose to answer that sheepishly as he left Casey to keep his face on the table. "Splinter, my dad" he adds in quickly "bought my brothers an' me before we all well became 'his." Maybe it would help to point it out maybe get them a bit more used to it? Maybe it was stupid to make it so apparent he was in fact a turtle. Raph wasn't sure but hey they were trying? and Raph appreciated that. All Raph wants is to keep this place as he seen it as a second home. Squeezing Casey's hand a little bit more to assure them more than anything else this time. They just got to get through this dinner, and if Raph's lucky? Casey's dad will like him by the time dishes are getting cleaned up.

#muse| hamato rapheal #madamkezzie #aflockofffeathers #[ if you jump off a bridge its only cause i did first aflockoffeathers] #muse interactions #ic reply #stay queued #((shoulda wore the sweater clearly would have impressed his dad XD))

[drrav3nb]

The types of lawful husbands content we got in Episode 9 because we got fed a whole feast y’all!

#how can we have been fed a whole buffet and i'm still hungry #i want moreeeee #it's crazy how all their interactions have a sense of normalcy now #gaon staying with yohan and elijah feels so right and normal #yohan showing his vulnerable side is becoming more frequent #these two working together and not against each other is becoming normal #for once they were communicating in this episode like omggg the growth #omg i love them so much #lawful husbands #the devil judge #tvn the devil judge #yohan x gaon #kim ga on #kang yo han #ji sung #jinyoung #got7 jinyoung #jin young #kdrama #korean drama #1k

[seiyasabi]

Ripe For The Pickin’

(This is a Yandere Kita x Fem Reader Story! Hopefully y’all like this lmao, sorry if his hick accent is annoying lmao, I thought it gave him ¬flavour¬

Tw: !!noncon!, !misogyny!, breeding kink!, !Detailed postpartum depression!!!, !!!Mentions of attempted suicide and murder of a child!!!, !Mental illness!, !Defeatist attitude!, !Disassociation!,  housewife reader!, threats of physical harm!, manipulation!, mentions of kids!, etc.. 

Please proceed with caution! Note: Part of my family are farmers- my grandpa specifically, and he speaks very similarly to how I wrote Kita’s dialogue (the joking bit). He had a farm in Hawaii growing up, and he always jokes that he’s ‘but a country folk,’ so I mean no offense to those who own a farm. )

Throwing down his work cap on your kitchen table, Kita visibly brightens at your busy form. Your two year old son is balanced perfectly on your hip, your other hand stirring a pot of Udon. The steam rises around your head, slightly flushing your (skin colour) complection. 

Looking up, your eyes immediately meet the white haired male’s, causing you to freeze up momentarily. He sends you a warning look. 

“Welcome Home, Shinsuke,” A wobbly grin spreads across your painted features (just how Kita liked- he likes when you try to look good for him), catching the attention of your son immediately. 

“Daddy!” He practically hops out of your hold, rushing to the large male. Your unwanted husband scoops him up in his buff arms, swinging him around. 

“Whoa, one’a these days yer gonna throw yer Pa’s back out,” He grins happily at his carbon copy, smooching the small boy on his grey hair. 

The little one giggles cutely, basking in his father’s presence. You quickly approach Kita, hugging him from the side, and giving him a quick kiss on the cheek, “We’ve missed you all day, My Love,” He always likes it when you’re sappy- it makes him feel wanted. 

At your words, he delivers a lingering kiss to your lip tint stained lips, your son half in your arms and half in your husband’s. You lightly pinch your babe’s cheek, causing him to giggle, before you kiss him on his forehead. Kita visibly brightens at your affectionate side, his open arm wrapping around your waist, “What’cha makin’ fer dinner, Pretty Lady?” 

You cringe internally, yet you can’t help the blush that forms on your pretty face, “Kazue wanted Udon- I hope that’s okay,” Shinsuke nods, a thoughtful look on his face. 

“‘O course,” He lightly pinches your son’s other cheek, “If our growin’ boy wants Udon, by God, he’ll get it.” 

-

Settling Kazue down in his bed, you give the sleeping boy a tender kiss on the forehead. As much as you hate Kita, you don’t have the heart to hate your son. He, like you, didn’t ask to be here, so you decided to be the best mom he could ever have. 

Smoothing his blanket over his lower body, you tuck the other bits under him, and lay his favourite stuffy next to him. Once done, you step away from the slumbering babe, and make your way out of his room. Kita is waiting in the night light lit hallway, leaning against the opposing wall. 

You jump slightly, not expecting him to be there. 

“Is something wrong, Shinsuke?” A practiced smile appears on your face, hands clasping behind your back to keep you grounded. 

He says nothing, motioning you to follow him, before turning and walking towards your shared bedroom. Shuffling after him, you try to still your rapidly beating heart. Did you do something wrong? 

Kita isn’t one to shy away from punishment. If anything, he revels in the momentary feeling of power-that is, until your broken body and mind are left in the aftermath. Then, he can’t help but feel horrible, because in some twisted way, the man truly loves you. So, he’ll try to cuddle and kiss his wrongs away, trying to forget that he’s the catalyst of all the things going wrong in your life. 

Burying those thoughts away, you step into the darkened room, noticing immediately that Kita is settled on his side of the bed. He’s stripping himself of his overshirt, exposing his wife-beater underneath, “Ya know, I think it’s time fer the boy ta have a brother.”

It feels as though the world around you is crumbling. Just when you gain a sense of normalcy, the bastard rips that away from you. 

Your smile visibly wavers, but you try to hold strong, “I-well, I don’t know if that’s a good idea,” Your hands are trembling, your heart practically being torn from your chest, “Kazue is still a toddler, I think it would be better if he was around five. Then, he can interact with-” Kita holds up a hand, halting your speech. 

“Yer gettin’ too technical fer the simple folk in tha room, Pretty Lady,” He stands to his feet, discarding his slippers, before slipping his baggy jeans off of his lower half, “Jus’ say yer too selfish to give yer lovin’, hardworkin’ husband tha things he deserves-” 

Kita knows that you had postpartum depression. He knows that you not only almost hurt yourself, but also your precious son. He knows that you had to be sedated at one point to even continue living. Yet, it seems like he doesn’t care. 

Tears fill your eyes, as you finally let your feelings become known, “That was horrible to say, Shinsuke. You know how hard it was for me-”

“It was also hard fer me too, ya’know,” He’s doing it again… trying to manipulate you into being the bad guy, “Seein’ ya go bonkers was hard ta’ watch. Plus, seein’ our son almost drown in tha tub-” 

“Stop it!” You finally lose your cool, surprising your usually collected kidnapper, “You don’t get to claim it was hard for you, when everything is your fault!” His mouth open and closes like a dying fish, unsure what to say, “If you waited for me to be ready to have children, I wouldn’t have spiraled out of control. If I was given the help I needed, I wouldn’t have gone psychotic. If you hadn’t stolen me away from my life and forced me to bend to your will, none of this would have happened!” By now, you’re a sobbing mess. He always does this. Kita always breaks you down until you seem crazy, but you’re not. You’re just tired of how he treats you like a baby maker, tired of how he treats you like nothing, yet claims you’re his entire world. 

But, when you hear him sigh softly to himself, you know that he doesn’t care about your feelings, “Do I need to use the gag? I thought we were above that.” 

Knowing that refusal won’t be tolerated or respected, you don’t bother wasting anymore of your breath. Slipping off your house slippers, you shuck off your dress, revealing your bare chest and panties. More tears slip down your face, as you lay down on your large shared bed. 

Shinsuke grins at your compliance, quickly moving between your legs, and stripping you of your drawers. His rough fingers rub at your clit and slit, “Good girl. ‘Ya know yer man jus’ wants what’s good fer ya, an’ a baby is good fer any good woman.” 

You ignore him, but he doesn’t seem to care. Kita continues to rub against your clit, trying to coax an orgasm out of you. But, you don’t give him the satisfaction. 

Staring at the ceiling, you let your mind go. Your dissociated body reacts well to his ministrations, your arousal coating your thighs, as they tremble in lieu of an orgasm. 

His fingers dig in deep, as they force your pussy open. Feeling how relaxed you are, he decides that you’re loose enough to go right in. 

Pulling out his thick cock, he bumps the head against your slick cunny, “Don’ worry, Darlin’, yer man will take good care of ya,” He slides in with relative ease, your hips bumping against his.  

The normal constricting feeling in your chest has long since faded, instead, the feeling of acceptance at the fact that you couldn’t get out of this replaced it. 

Your body jolts and rolls with Kita’s harsh thrusts, his panting warm against your neck, “Yer so good fer me, (Your Name), yer gonna bear me healthy sons,” The gummy walls of your pussy knead his cock thoroughly, trying to milk him for everything he’s got, “I knew you were perfect fer the takin’.” 

He forces your knees next to your head, the head of his cock bashing into your cervix painfully. Fortunately, that was enough to set your body off. A gush of cum drenches the both of you, as Kita slams himself inside of you entirely, allowing your womb to be filled to the brim with his fertile cum. 

“Ya never disappoint, Darlin’,” He smooches you on your lax lips, ignoring the fact that your head is practically empty, “Maybe you’ll have twins this time.” 

With that, he starts his hardcore pace one more. 

But, you can’t bring yourself to care. As long as you can drift away from the events unfolding in front of you, 

#kita shinsuke #yandere kita #kita x y/n #kita x reader #yandere haikyuu #yandere haikyuu x reader #yandere haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagines #tw: noncon #tw: pregnancy #tw violent thoughts

[aeempress]

Apritello Express Evidences, part 3

Apritello, my dear friends, is really all hints, devil in details, little pieces that, in the end, become a huge picture.

I can't say that there are a lot of episodes with April and Donnie spending quality time together, no. But all episodes are important to understand how their relationship are involving, growing. If you have sharp eyes and think about all of this even a little bit, you will be surprised how gracefully their relationship changes and grows, how characters evolve.

Dear passengers, we're about to start. Mind the gap!

Episodes “The Gumbus” and “Mrs. Cuddles”. 

I think it would be appropriate to analyze these episodes in bunch, because they have common situations of spooky supernatural stuff and reactions of characters to this.

When you watch these two eps in raw, it's easy to see how alike are reactions of Donnie and April in some scary, really odd situations. 

Adrenaline ‘n’ reclessness

April is really into all spooky things in “The Gumbus”, she's not afraid of some creepy stuff and she's really brave girl who easily copes with stressful and life-threatening situations.

Donnie is incredibly calm and collected when alive doll talked to him.

But still, April was frightened about plush rabbit because it was really unexpected for girl, she wasn’t ready to realize that plush doll that she’d worked with is alive fear-eating monster who will hurt and intimidate to get their precious screams. But point remains: Donnie and April share crazy fearlessness, which turns into an adrenaline addiction.

And here I am, a science guy, who tell you: adrenaline is a big deal for our body. This hormone can even provoke an onset of romantic feelings. Chemistry and anatomy come to fill the gaps: when a person is afraid, their pulse quickens, a cocktail of hormones is releasing into the blood, which sharpen the senses and reflexes. It will create a strong emotional bound, that's important for maintaining romantic kind of feelings. The more impressions there are (even negative ones), the higher the chance that person will remember his|her partner, and want to see them again – the body gets hooked on adrenaline, like a drug.

That’s why D&A have so strong, unshakeable boundaries. They are so alike: their attitude to scary things, the way Donnie and April cope with them, the adrenaline addiction their share. They even express feelings the same way.

And one tiny detail: April and Donnie start the teasing Raph for his fear of mrs. Cuddles. So they become the first victims of plushie.

Friendly reminder: they were the 1st victims, and what’s happened with them we don’t know, because it wasn’t shown due to not ruin the atmosphere of suspense.

But we have a beautiful quote of mrs. Cuddles and this precious shot which explain everything

Raph: Where’s Donnie?

Cuddles: In a happy place where he’ll scream and I can grow forever and now you’re gonna join him!

In a happy place, huh? Tied up with April in Splinter’s bedroom, a really happy place. Hold a sec, are they -

And after that Donnie’s responding is killing me.

Donnie:[OS] I'm afraid of togetherness.

Yep. All normal here. We should continue.

"Operation Normal" even though doesn't show a lot of interactions between April and Donnie, however continues the general outline highlighting the topics that were mentioned earlier in the show.

Firstly, April's relationship with her classmates. We're able to see how poor her scholar life is in "Hypno Part Deux" and "The Purple Jacket". She has no "normal", human friends except some strange remora guy, more like acquaintance than friend, though. But still, having "be normal" kick she's fine with Donnie's weirdness ( Mikey is always beyond all normal comprehension, Raph goes weird while he's alone, without brothers, and his fear of miss Cuddles is no big deal to fam, Leo didn't show any weird stuff during the series, like, reeeeal weird, m'kay?).

Conversation between April and Donnie at pizza spot

Really interesting and smooth scene. We’ve got Donatello who stares at April while he’s waiting his favourite pizza, no big deal.

And his legs.

If a person is interested in you, during a conversation, they will put their right foot forward (a left-handed person is more likely to put their left foot forward) in order to close the distance between you. - Check.

being in company, peson will point the sock at the most pleasant interlocutor for them. - check.

April’s legs are ponted at Donnie. Checkmate.

Yeah, April is hanging out with Donatello and Leonardo, but the main focus of hers is on Donnie. 

All these scene makes me think that Donnie, knowing about how badly sometimes April  wants to be normal, is up to help her overcome this. Fight fire with fire:  fill up her life with all of this weird, mystic stuff so it will be normal with time. Regular people go to pizza spot to spend some quality time together, so we have pizza restaraunt here, in Hidden City. Make all odd normal, and problem will solved.

Donnie really tries his best, look at his face. Dee’s fine with all this bizzare things what happens to April, he’s fine with her. But still he fails, because April’s concept of normalcy differs drom Donnie’s.

And again, for Donnie it’s not a problem at all. He’s always was at the opposite side of normalcy and it doesn’t matter for him if April is in the same boat with him. Cause, as I said, Don’s fine with that.

Second, how much Donnie knows about April.

- Scoff! Are you really still on this whole "I want things to be normal" kick?

- Yes, what big city girl doesn't have a kayak and has hazmat suit?

Interesting detail here: this line launches Donnie’s flashback (because the first scene is from “Purple Jacket”, it’s Dee’s episode, obviously). And Don, as far as I can tell, has in his flashback moments with April when she did something reaaally impressive. His face is way more louder than any words.

- Short answer: no. Long answer: nnooooooooo.

- Oh, no! You know how April freaks out around the cosplay wizards!

These tiny lines are containing a lot of background, stories, intimate conversations that April and Donnie share. This show always does the same trick: we never see a direct action, we are only able to see a result or statement of the result. But series do a great work telling us with such small and imperceptible gestures that their bonding at this point is mutual. Not only D tells April about his inventions, family and fam's issues he has and even his falls, mistakes and failures. April does the same thing, sharing with Donatello one of the most important things to her. Problem that really bothers her.

C'mon, he'd even memorized Sunita's name, though April messed up with this situation a bit. It seems Donnie memorizes facts about April - he remembered the wi-fi password from old April's work as we can see in "The Longest fight" (he could hack it easily, he's a genius, why he's been keeping in mind some piece information that useless for a year? It doesn't make any sense)

Oh, and that. Just a coincidence, I guess?

Just alike suits, no big deal. Plus, the whole family has it (and something tells me that guys have suits at the behest of Don, so probably April does). But Donnie and April has a lot in common like emotional expressions, reaction about some kind situations, fight style and even tastes in fashion.

Also, it seems like Donnie's been watching April for sometimes.

While Leo was hiding in trash can, to not catch anyone's eye rather than April. He definitely couldn't know who was passing by, but there was Donnie to observe from above. That's why he was hanging down the stairs when Leo spoke to April.

It’s not the first time Donnie dress up as old lady to monitor April’s day.

Leo: Why do you always make us dress up as old ladies? Donnie: №1: confort, №2: to blend in as we monitor April’s day for max normalcy.

 3. Even when D took away this cosplay wizard, he's still keeping eye on her.

Oh no, you don’t. Grandmas here!

Donatello changes his foe to save April exactly. He fought all evening with Brutus, but when April slightly gets in danger, Donnie just attacked anyone who has intention to hurt her and ruin her evening.

Is that a flying turtle in an old purple dress?

April, who all evening was trying to look “normal”, hiding her real friends because they are mutant turtles and pretending that nothing unusual happens here, finally gives up when Sunita mentioned Donnie. Even though new April’s friend has asked her before about Leo.

His eyes. 

Donnie is really impressed but what he saw, and the reason - April O'Neil.

The episode "Warren & Hypno, sitting in a Tree" is another incredible piece of whole picture.

Turtle tank is decorated for April birthday in purplish scheme, definetely Donatello's work.

Dee's nonverbal speech.

• He seems more interested and softer than usual looking at April. It's easy to say comparing him with brothers. Mikey is in anticipation of fun mode, Leo relaxed and show his "whatever it will be fun" attitude, Raph is listening carefully, but still, Donnie could just turn his head in April's vouce direction, not a whole body.

• Warren felt Don's gaze while talked with April, so worm made the remark. Pay attention to the construction of the frame of neighboring scenes. The second frame is April's perspective. And Don is looking namely at her.

Indignation. Disappointment. Spark, storm, madness (i love this russian meme, sorry not sorry)

• Donnie seems sincerely sorry for this situation with April's b-day. And again, this soft gaze and "Raph, shut the shell up, your nonsense is upsetting her"-eyes.

• Donatello is kind of person, who’s avoiding a proper confrontation, so he rarely stands up for someone.  He were remaining silent, when Raphael tried to cheer April in the most radiculous way, but when Hypno tried to play with April’s feelings, Donnie blew it. 

He’s obviously in wrath as D emote that expressively. Yeah, he had much on his plate at April’s birthday, but it’s her b-day on the line, not his pride.

Warren used April, playing with her fan feelings. Her idol betrayed her, she was locked up in a cage, and now we have Hypno who wants to use her again by pitting and pushing for her compassion, because, it’s obvious - boys would do everything she said. 

And Donnie tries to keep Hypno away from her, protect her feelings from another betrayal. 

As he’s already stated - “For you, anything”.

The show always tells us: if you wanna trigger Don, bring April in. 

Hypno tried to turn this thing around, Leo did the same in “Al be back”. 

If Hypno-tamus did that accidentally as he found out that April O’ Neil is a birthday girl, so her wishes that day were laws, Leo did it on purpuse.

Leo is good at manupulating and pulling some strings, plus he knows his twin as back of his hand. That’s why Leo mentioned April in the end as she was always the most powerful argument, the reason and motive for Donnie. At second he’s even panicked, but remained calm. He almost blew up his coolheaded image because of one certain girl in yellow.

• Donnie is really happy to present Warren's arm to April. He even holds it like a rare, priceless treasure. D is really proud of himself right now: he saved the day, after all. The emotional reaction of hers is exactly what Donnie wants to get. And then, his final pose, while April is on 9th cloud from happiness - that's really territorial gesture, D claims his supremacy and confidence, telling "See? That's my happy birthday girl".

Leapfrog with a composition

Donnie and April are more and more eager to be together in the frame. Composition’s boners, m’kay.

Special ride for April

Yeah, Donnie used to offer his battleshell to give April a special ride. It even has  a seat and handlebars for her comfort. She can control the flight as well as Donatello, they are like co-pilots. But he never carried her on his back before.

Usually, April is carried by Raphael, on his neck/shoulder, and she’s fine with it. Raph is strong enough to carry her without any difficulties or slowing down.

It’s not Donnie’s weak to carry her - no, he strong enough to carry his battleshell with a lot stuff in it everyday, Don can carry Splints on his shoulder without any apparent difficulty. He strong enough to hold the weight of his battleshell+April. Oh, c’mon, D assembled the Turtle tank only by himself and this for sure requires a lot of physical strength in order to engage in auto mechanics. Try lifting the wheel with tyre, and you'll see what I mean. Of course, there is a jack, but it will not solve all the problems. Don could use hydraulics and Archimedes ' laws, but I'm sure he did most of it with his own hands. Lifting and carrying, all by himself.

Not the strengh what’s matter but another point.

The sequence where Donnie carries April on his back doesn’t last long, it’s pretty easy to miss, while Raph openly do that with April on him. 

Plus April’s gaze: she’s staring right at us with her “ninja-eyes” as if they were caught in the middle of something. The duration and length of the sequence, the way it is made all of this arouse certain thoughts. 

It’s like nobody should see this. Too personal. To be more specific - too close and intimate? 

Donnie stated a few times that he’s not into togetherness, tactile interaction and phisical side of contacts. Although he's fine with his brothers, don't forget that April is a girl. Even if she feels like part of family, she’s not his relative. She’s not his sister. 

Some people tend to avoid physical contact with the objects of their interest. And this behaviour fits in Don’s character. He’s anxious type with a lot of psychological and emotional issues. Yeah, he tries to cover it up, built a shell to protect himself, behave as confident extravert but he’s nothing like that. Sometimes D tends to distance himself from his family, to hide in his shell, and we've seen that throughout the show. 

Don hangs by his phone quite often, he addicted to this as his comfort zone, his peaceful cave, where everything is much easier,

Don pretends he’s so busy with his science stuff to ward off his brothers (ep. Mind Meld), 

Don went to the lab to work on his projects, while he could hang out with April and the brothers (ep. Mrs. Cuddles). And he left for what? To work on self-cleaning tooth pick, or the titan bust of himself? It’s seems like lame excuse to be alone. He’s definetely an intovert, who sometimes needs some space and time with himself. 

All his cocky behaviour is showing off to hide insecure, diffident and vulnerable creature, softshell purple turtle. Yeah, Donnie has confidence in what he’s great in: tech, science stuff, where he’s only one is capable of. But if someone steps on his domain or doubts his authority, his true colours exposed.

And, once again, “Mind meld” is a great evidence of that. Would callous, unsumpathetic guy without heart have a wall with pictures of his fellows? I’m afraid not. Donnie has a soft, caring heart.

There’s an alley of his the dearest moments, because photos - are always memory, precious moments we want to keep. 

1 - from “Minotaur Maze”. Don loves good pizza, loves his brothers, and they have a little adventure together. Yeah, this photo isn’t on champ wall, but still.

2 - from “Mascot melee”. Important day for bros as they show themselves to people at daylight to rescue Raph and their operation to buy a new robe for his father. It’s their joint brothers dance, and D is loving to dance, remember? Definetely special occasion.

3 - from “Mascot melee”. Splints was really glad to receive a gift from boys. And Donatello, as we know, is always eager to achive for pop’s approval. This for sure must be in his precious moments collection.

5, 7 - from “Donnie’s gifts”. He even keeps a dorky photo, which Raph uses as profile pic at Donnie’s number.

8, 9 - “Down with the sickness”. It was funny to survive all the 7 stages to achive what boys wanted. They failed, but still.

10 - from “Al be back”. Who knows that Splints is so good at singing?

4, 6 - from “The Fast and the Furriest”. Strange choice, cuz, you know, photos ten seconds before his collision with April bat?

And yeah, he HAS April’s photo here. And at this pic it’s April, and April alone,without his brothers. 

Don’s a real softie, see?

And avoiding physical contact is a way to protect Donnie’s already shattered self-esteem. To not cause any doubts in front of girl which he’s interested in. That’s possible reason why we did not receive any heartwarming hugs in “The Purple Jacket”.

But Donnie carries April, because it’s her birthday. On the one hand, the girl claims that  her b-day is cursed, and Donnie could, by any chance, do something nice for her, and on the other hand - any request of the bithday girl - is the law, as we could see earlier.

Gift for birthday girl

There is no Donnie in the scene after Draxum throw off Warren's arm. While Raph comfort April about her birthday, Donnie was looking for it to present it to April.

He knows the best what is the most precious gift for her. Warren Stone, her idol, goat of making news; she have been in Stoneheads fanclub for 9 years. Also, it seems that Donnie is the one of turtles, who collected info about this worm.

Also, he stopped immediately when April stepped between them and show no disappointing (remind you about Donnie's sadistic science guy nature). The reason is April.

And another cute detail: their glasses are the same form.

Another episode "Mystic library" has slightly touched D&A interaction. But were talking about Apritello, it's all hints but quality.

When Mayham trapped in the mirror and Raph, Leo and Mikey obviously are not coping, April decides to call Donnie to clear situation up.

Donnie, mister "I ruin everything", she's going to call for help. I repeat this. April calls for help Mr. Science to solve mystic problems with her pet. MYSTIC PET.

 And he AGREES.

Turtles dissuade their friend from calling Donatello but after a while, April returns with Donnie, and sees the bathroom in ruins.

I'm gonna clear this moment.

1. April haven’t called Donnie.

2. Some time later she returns with Dee.

3. Our girl is pretty shocked to see her bathroom in ruins, argo she didn't see/hear Raph chose to solve problem with smashing.

It must mean only ine thing: April went for Donnie by herself. We don't know where was he, we don't know what the reason April brought Donnie with her by herself, 'cause we know that if she call Dee, he will definitely get to her immediately.

Something is definetely off.

By the way, April changed Don’s profile pic.Yeah, the first one is very informative since Donnie is a turtle and he’s purple and he has bandana. Seems like April have done it by herself, editing the photo of real turtle. She didn't put a lot of effort into this, this image doesn't show her real attitude towards Don. But second is more personality-tinged. Sleeping Donatello in all his gear - this detail can tell us about only one thing - he was photographed when he fell asleep after his sleepless night(s) working hard at something - is something she can catch or receive by boys (namely speaking, it’s Leo, according to Ben Schwartz stated in an interview, that if Leo had an Instagram account, that 60 to 70% of his photos would be his brothers caught sleeping or slipping on things). And still. April has a dorky and little embarrassing pic of Donatello and this is... Interesting and cute?

This profile pic remind me about ROTTMNT: Sound off! (2nd issue)

The next station is “The Purple Game”.

Another episode in which the interaction of the characters is small in timing, but great in content.

And once again: they have a lot in common. I’d never tired of repeating this thing ‘cause the series do the same trick, showing one thing from different points of view. April and April shares the same taste in games, the same attitude, the same mojo. 

But the most important thing here is how D&A interacrions are shown in this episode. Unlike other episodes, the interaction here is indirect, is provided by gaming.

Their customized avatars reflects their personality. I mean, the colour schemes (though Donatello has never shown any interest in yellow, he used it for customization of his persona), the way their avatars looking. Game even refering to Sherlock_Corn as “she”, albeit it’s impossible to refer to her avatar in female pronoun. Because, you know, design and nickname?

And the in-game interaction of the avatars resembles D&A irl relationships. Bootyyyshaker 9000 don’t like togetherness, he’s looking like Donnie’s expectation of himself (cool and tough guy, as D sees himself in his own dreams)

Their dialogue

Actually. Actually, Donnie and April are not able to hear each other as game has no voice chat, but their lines make an perfect dialogue nevertheless.

April:Bootyshaker9000? Donnie? 

Donnie:April? You’re the last person I need to destroy to achive rank №1!

April:Ditto!

Both:There can only be one!

Donnie said the cheat combination, so April would know for sure what he is supposed to do, but she has no idea.

So, once again: their sync is incredible.

And can we talk about that?

April’s attack

As it seems, attacks may be customized by players. Bootyyshaker has attack that refers at Donatello main feature - superior intellect.

And this attack isn’t effective, because REAL April O’Neil has a resist towards it. She has known D for years, she knows what he’s capable of, she’s aware of his nerd side. April’s immune to it, so Sherlock_Corn is.

 Sherlock_corn has a default attack - kernel cannon. It’s nod to her nickname: kernel, corn, the same book. But her second atteck is something reflecting her personalitiy. Plus, April is aware of Donnie’s “fear” of togetherness. All’s fair in love and war, right?

April took a lot of BS9000 hp by her “friendly hugs”. And, by the way, his sweet reaction for hugs.

So:

The selection of the final opponent. It might be literally anyone, but we wouldn’t be able to see Dee’s obsession in that case. Yeah, he’s already had a  demon possesion ™, but it was too easy to him to win. No challenge. No “kill or be killed”, “It’s me or you” mojo.  He needed some tough gamer for challenging, to develop his character, push him too far. And  April, actually, is an excellent choice to reveal the character of certain purple turtle.To expose his true colours. And April do a great job: they know each other, so battle will be spicy, they are both compepitors, they are so alike, so it would be intersting to watch Donatello vs April. And it will, ‘cause In-game April and In-game Don is somewhat different than them usual.

April is Don’s slayer for sure. She’s good at gaming, her last attack was almost fatal for him. So he had to to cheated on her. 

Captain Cuddlecakes. Yes, she know about his afraid of togetherness. And there’s lovey-dovey attack animation with this cuddling and Donatello’s persona behaves like him. And it was SPECIAL RUN, so... I haven’t the foggiest why. Cute detail, I mean.

Just look at it.  Isn’t it cute?(at least we got their hugs somewhere... kinda. kinda.)

“Snow Day“, albeit  being family episode, shows a lot about D&A relationship through “family war”.

First of all, the same taste in films.   

Donnie’s already shown the same attitude to fashion, scary things as Cap O'Neil, April shares the same gamer’s mojo as Donatello, but now? We have Donnie and April that are loving the same movie.

For love of purple supernovas, of all the Jupiter Jim’s movies (and there are more than 60 of them), that's a convinient coincidence, they like the same movie.

It stated in series several times that Dee is fond of Atomic Lass. He had crush on her when he was child, he admires her by all his heart, so it will make sense if films with this character he would be his favourite. It’s logical, isn’t it?

Atomic Lass, even if she is part of JJ-universe, however, isn't in every movie. Leo described "JJ: Pluto vacation IV" and there is no sights of Atomic Lass. Like, at all. 

Nevertheless, April’s claimed that “PV-4” is the best movie of the time, and Don agrees. 

April:What the whaaaat? Hold up, Skip. “Jupiter Jim Pluto Vacation 4″ is the best JJ movie  of all time.

Donnie:Ranked, by us, just now. So it’s basically official, no arguing.

And they do this thing again. Reflecting each other. Facial expressions, intonations, poses and etc. Haven’t I mentiones that? Mirroring is natural way to build communication. People, who communicate enthusiastically, who have sympathy to each other, feelings of certain nature, unconsciously copy each other's poses.

Direct reflection and close contact have a strong effect. This is used between lovers, people with close relationships or interested in each other.

And you can see that during not only episode, but through the whole series. 

Poses, gestures, facial expressions they share constantly. Even if they are apart, they are mirroring each other, showing their bound. Because Apritello is not always about sitting close, holding hands and blushing. Apritello is about staying together even if they are not.  It’s about solid foundation, about synergy, about chemistry Donnie and April share. And all of these are not always so obvious and clear, evident. But so realistic nevertheless.

And that’s why they splitted off the fam - they are too close and alike. 

I stated it before but DonniexApril team is way more effective than Donniexbrothers team. Donatello and April are equal, worth each other. They are comfortable with each other, their teamwork is amazing. 

They are always near, close to each other for the entire episode. Stand up for each other, side by side. They have no need to do team-building, because their sincronization is incredible. April works well together with Donnie, their skills compliment each other. 

I love that April in a first place look at Donnie to check is everything alright.

And a cherry on top?

This inviting gesture. Donnie just watched all along how his brothers and April try to throw some cold water on this situation (khem, it slipped). But when April call him with this inviting gesture, he’d like to help. 

In other words, he was waitng when April requests for his help.    

Composition’s boners

Sometimes it happens during the show, but this episode beat hte score at this point. I say only one word: physics. Or, more precisely, the force of attraction. Or, maybe Mayham.

... Anyway.

Fitting in the type

April can play not so nice against her enemies, she got steady hand and meanness, merciless and reclessness. She’s passionate and kinda badass, sassy - in a positive way, she’s baddest girl who can kick your butt if you mess with her, and she really good at this. 

She has a fire, and Donnie likes that. Dee never stated that directly but miss O’Neil impressed him so many times and in different way so it’s kinda pretty obvious. 

Just look how Donatello reacted the way April took Raph down a peg. Her actions are elegant, relaxed but really sly. She almost dare Raph to put his flag on top only to bring him down to Earth in really painful way. She destroyed Bros’ team so easily just by waiting a bit and by calling Mayham. 

She’s definetely got some pepper.

Pretty cute but baddest, don’t you think?

And Donnie was impressed for sure, he admitted it - “That is fun for me”. He don’t even stand a chance, c’mon: she’s smarass and elegant, she can be mean and cute at the same time. 

Even though that’s it for season 1 analysis (the last series is more appropriate  to review as part of 2nd season, plus it was a reaally big post, I need some time)

You can refresh this whole situation in the car 1 and the car 2 or follow the hashtag #apritello express as you please. It’s a pleasure of mine, keep in touch :)

#teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja #rise of tmnt #rottmnt #apritello express #apritello evidences #rottmnt apritello #aprilxdonnie #rise donnie #rise donatello #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt donatello #donatello hamato #rise april #rise april o'neil #rottmnt april #rottmnt april o'neil #tmnt2018 #donnie 2018 #april o'neil 2018 #apritello 2018

[dangan-meme-palace]

I don't know if you ever played through Maki's Salmon mode (or if you just looked up the danganronpa fandom wiki like I did!) but I felt that her character was different there.

Something really noticeable was her relationship to violence that completely changed in the salmon mode. I went though all of her interactions...

Here, Maki is actively triggered by anything and anyone that can have a association with violence (because of her job), and sometimes it's the slightest things... she cannot watch action movies for example. She gets pissed if you suggests assassinating someone (I talk about that again in the end of this ask.). Another thing that changed (but makes sense with that characterization) : she doesn't make any of her trademark do you wanna die jokes in this game mode, in fact the only instances where she tells that are when it isn't a joke, if Shuichi suggests taking off their clothes for example (lol)

In itself, it's not strange because all her Salmon mode interactions are about: 1) her assassin work. 2)how it leaves her traumatized and depressed, and how she just wants to forget for one second and craves freedom and a normal life. 3) how she is a normal girl she is super soft, nice and smiling with Shuichi and likes soft and sweet things (and at one point she fangirls over something silly and then she thinks about her reaction and says that she's way too soft to be an assassin). In that context, it makes the most sense that the slightest reminder of violence is unbearable to a traumatized and soft at heart Maki.

But, this Maki is a stark contrast to the person Maki was in-game, she still hated her job but wasn't weirdly nice and most of all, she was either hyper violent in game or was unbothered by violence. Recap:

- she can make jokes about killing Shuichi and in chapter 6, as they become "closer" (the narrative was going for that, I guess...) she makes more of her jokes (and with her smiling sprite now, so...) The jokes were her way of showing that she somewhat likes you I guess. That totally changes in the salmon mode.

-she suggests or threatens with killing or violence in situations that don't even, warrant such a response, like killing the student council, Kokichi, or hurting Shuichi if he forces his way into her lab (in chapter 2).

-she actively tries to murder Kokichi when he masquerades as mastermind instead of waiting a few hours to save Kaito with everyone and after failing, she can't let go of that, to the point she pursues a goal that would kill all the remaining people, with one of this people being a close friend of hers.

-and when she assumes that Tenko comes to see her because she wants Angie to die and Maki can help her as the assassin, she has no actual reaction or outrage. (she was pissed in the salmon mode if Shuichi thinks about murdering someone.)

I have other issues with her characterization in that game mode but I really wanted to know your thoughts on this, maybe I'm going crazy but she doesn't feels the same at all and I'm bothered

Is this what all the sai/haru fans have been talking about? Because that shit was cute af ngl and if any of this had been in the main game I'd at least vouch for that ship.

Under the cut for length:

More seriously, I agree with you that her character has taken a dramatic shift in her SMEs when compared to the main game or even her FTEs. Where before she was willing to kill, thought she could never be normal again, and cold to most everyone aside from Kaito (outside of the final trial, which fucks with everyone) in the SMEs she now avoids depictions of violence and is generally more open and sociable– kind even– and craves normalcy and tries to live vicariously.

She feels like two different people, which is definitely bad on the writing team for not being able to keep Maki's character consistent, but let's talk about this new take on Maki anyway.

I feel like SME Maki is what post-arc Maki should have been and– now that I see the writers are actually capable of talking about her trauma and it's effects– I'm a bit miffed that she wasn't given this same treatment when it actually mattered: her character arc during the main game. I'm glad it's there at all, but why is it in a bonus mode and not where it would have had more impact and was actually needed for the narrative?

Most– not all, but most– of the problems I have with Maki's "arc" in the main game, such as the continued violence despite herself and others saying that she's been working on it, the lack of moments where we can see that she's actually working on it, the lack of change outside of falling in love with Kaito, the threatening, betraying everyone after acting as though she was trying to rally them together, etc, would have been solved if her post-arc personality was replaced by her personality in her SMEs.

Not to say that she's outstanding or anything in the SMEs, I do have a few minor criticisms for SME Maki, but overall my impression of her is pretty damn positive when I take into account how I feel about post-arc Maki.

My first criticism is that she's kinda stale? It's just a standard post-abuse story, nothing's really thought provoking or gripping.

It's cookie cutter, in a way, but compared to the main game where the basic standards for this type of character are either not met or poorly elaborated, I'd take the generic SME Maki any day.

Aside from the staleness, there's a couple of other minor criticisms I'd like to make.

The first is that, much like the second workout with just Maki and Shuichi, Maki in Salmon Mode really projects onto Shuichi a lot and thinks that his experiences are similar to hers, which isn't true from what we know about Shuichi's past. I understand why she would assume that, and I also get that it's a dating mode and they had to give her some reason to like Shuichi and open up to him so we could see some cute gap moe, but it still felt a bit off because of the contradiction of both character and Shuichi's backstory so I wish they hadn't done that. It's not a deal breaker, but it's kinda eye rolling to me.

The second is one she also shares with her main game counterpart, which is that she opens up at the drop of a hat to someone she doesn't know well at all (again, dating mode will be dating mode) and it kinda sucks because it's just hard to believe she'd actually do that at all, especially given how secretive she was in CH1 and the fact that she's a literal assassin.

Yet if ignoring all that was all I had to do to have Maki actually change during the arc we were promised she would have, instead of only pretending it happened, then I could deal with it. What happened in the main game was practically insulting.

My only hope is that regardless of which characterization or development (or lack thereof), people don't forget good points that Maki started with, like being a voice of reason and being able to speak up when she thinks people are doing something stupid.

Either that, or like I said previously, they could just skip her arc entirely and make use of her pre-arc personality.

#asks #maki tag

[roseworth]

Shadows of the Moon

word count: 4.6k

summary: Prince Eugene of the Dark Kingdom never had anyone there for him growing up. When one of the knights has a child, he takes it upon himself to always be there for him. The two of them grow up like brothers, and they find a connection to a "normal" life through each other.

note: for Eugene Appreciation Week 🥰

AO3

When Prince Eugene first heard that one of the Brotherhood Knights was going to be a father, he was far from excited. Having a baby in the castle didn’t seem ideal to him. All it meant was that there was going to be some snotty little blob crying and making messes all the time.

But when Quirin introduced baby Varian to him, Eugene immediately felt a connection to the child. As crazy as the kingdom was sometimes, he felt calm knowing that there was someone he could connect with. They weren’t technically related, but the Prince immediately saw the child as a little brother, and silently swore he would do everything in his power to make him feel safe.

Of course, there wasn’t much a ten-year-old could do to help an infant. Eugene decided he would leave the protection to Varian’s parents, and he and Varian could just be each other’s connection to normalcy.

When Eugene was bored, he liked to go into Varian’s nursery and read him Flynnigan Rider stories. He was pretty sure the baby didn’t understand a word he was saying, but he still liked the audience. Besides, Varian would babble along when Eugene got to an exciting part of the story, so maybe he was entertained by it.

“The monster tried to sniff out Rider’s scent among the forest, hunting for his next catch. The rogue was unphased, of course, and ducked into a cave to hide from the beast,” Eugene read, adding in dramatic movements as he read. Varian gurgled from his crib, and Eugene smiled.

“That’s not even the best part!” he said. “Once the terrifying monster left, Rider ventured deeper into the cave to find more gold than he had ever seen!”

Varian gasped and flailed his arms. Eugene grinned. He stood up and leaned in closer to the crib. “And of course, there was the time Flynn ran from the ferocious mob! He launched himself up and onto a dragon... . ” He lifted Varian up and onto his shoulders. He made sure to hold the kid tightly so he wouldn’t fall, then ran around the room as he squealed in delight. “And he rode the dragon for miles until he was back home!” Varian babbled and stuck his arms up from his place on Eugene’s shoulders. Eugene spun around, then lifted him off his shoulders and back into the crib. Varian was bouncing excitedly, babbling nonsense with a smile on his face.

Eugene beamed down at him. Even though Varian was only 6 months old, spending time with him was the best part of the day. The kid was a bright light in the middle of the Dark Kingdom.

~

By the time Varian turned 1, everyone in the castle had all but accepted that he and Eugene had a connection. Eugene had spent years growing up with no other kids in the castle, but now he finally felt like he had a little brother. The two were inseparable, much to the annoyance of some.

“Your Highness,” Hector grumbled. “You can’t continue to do things like this. You’re royalty, you can’t constantly be up to these… things.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” the young prince said. Hector pointed at the child on Eugene’s shoulders, who was tugging on his hair and causing it to skew in every direction. “Oh him? He’s just my new advisor, he has to be with me at all times.”

Hector ran his hand down his face. “He’s a one-year-old, he’s not your advisor.’

“Oh yeah? Let’s see what my advisor has to say about that. Varian?”

Varian yelped and kicked his legs, making noises for a few seconds while Eugene listened intently, nodding along as if he was reciting important proverbs. “Go!” Varian said, reaching his arms forward.

“Well, you heard my advisor,” Eugene shrugged. “Maybe next time, Hector.” He grabbed onto Varian’s legs and dashed down the hallway, leaving Hector to regret his career choice. He heard the knight mutter something under his breath about how he couldn’t wait until the prince grew tired of spending all his time with a child, but Eugene ignored him.

~

Once Varian learned to walk and talk in full sentences, Eugene thought it was even more fun to spend time with him. He was full of energy, unlike everyone else he had to interact with in the kingdom. Everyone always acted like life was a burden they were forced to bear, but Eugene wanted to stay young and full of life forever.

The only problem was that once Eugene was 14, there were even more expectations put on him as the prince. He was told to conduct himself properly at all times, and he couldn’t get away with the excuse of being a kid anymore. He was called into his father’s office one day and was met with his usual cold gaze.

“The King and Queen of Corona will be visiting today, so I expect you to be on your best behavior,” Edmund said. He was sitting at his desk, his back straightened and his chin held high. Eugene stood on the other side of the desk, feeling uncomfortably still.

Eugene nodded. “Got it.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“You’re not going to embarrass us in front of our visitors?”

“No.”

Edmund looked his son up and down. “Good. They’ll be here in two hours, make sure you’re ready.”

Eugene nodded again, then turned around and left his father’s office. He sighed quietly after shutting the door, glancing back at the room. Ever since Eugene’s mom died, Edmund was never sure how to talk to his son, and every conversation made that clear. He felt like he had been raised by knights and maids, and every interaction with his father was like a formal business transaction.

He had barely taken 2 steps away from the room before Varian, ever the bundle of energy, ran up to him with a huge grin on his face. “Eugene!” he called out. “Wanna play Flynnigan Rider?”

The prince frowned. “I can’t, we have guests coming in a couple of hours and I just told my father I would be on my best behavior.”

Varian blinked. “Well, the guests aren’t here yet.” Eugene hesitated, and Varian stepped closer and gave his best “kicked puppy” eyes. “ Pleeeeease?”

“Fine,” he said with a grin. “But only for a bit, okay?”

“Okay!” the boy said brightly, then dashed away, gesturing for Eugene to follow him.

They grabbed wooden swords and started reenacting their favorite scenes from the Flynn Rider books. Time started to get away from them; it could have been 10 minutes or 10 hours and they wouldn’t be able to tell the difference.

“I’ve got you surrounded, Rider!” Eugene bellowed, pointing his sword at Varian as they chased each other down the halls of the castle.

“Ah, I see your point ,” Varian said. "But you'll have to try harder than that!" He ducked under the sword and slid under Eugene’s legs, making his escape.

“You’re not getting away that easily!” he yelled. He chased after the kid, and Varian screeched happily as he ran away.

“Get back, foul beast!” he yelled. Eugene grabbed him by the torso and lifted him up as both of them dissolved into giggles.

“I’ve got you now, Flynnigan!” Eugene said.

“That’s what you think!” Varian replied, trying to squirm out of the older boy’s grasp and knocking them both onto the floor. They wrestled on the ground between giggles until Varian managed to slip out and dash away.

Eugene lifted himself to his feet and tried to chase after the boy before almost colliding with someone else. His entire body tensed as he met eyes with the Queen of Corona, who had been there and had seen him playing with a 5-year-old.

“Your Majesty, hi, um, sorry,” he mumbled, dusting himself off. He was pretty sure his father would have a heart attack if he had seen the way Eugene was conducting himself. “Uh, welcome to the kingdom?”

Much to Eugene’s surprise, the Queen just smiled warmly at him. “Your hair got a little messed up,” she said simply, reaching out to fix it.

“Uh…”

“No need to make your father think there’s a problem here, right?” she added with a wink. Eugene chuckled nervously.

If he had learned one thing from his father, it was how to read someone from their eyes. The Queen had an amused look on her face, but her eyes looked sad. “Are you alright?” he asked carefully.

She smiled again and looked down, waving her arms dismissively. “I’m fine, I just… I’ve always wanted a kid. And seeing you two made me think...” she trailed off, then cleared her throat uncomfortably.

His heart sunk. He remembered hearing about what happened to the Princess of Corona years ago. The Queen had lost a daughter, he couldn’t blame her for being sad. “I-I’m sorry,” he said quietly. “I know how you feel, my mom…”

The Queen shook her head and put her hand on his shoulders. “It’s okay, there’s no need for all that.”

He looked up and smiled at her. The sound of quick footsteps broke their moment, and Varian appeared beside them seconds later. “Eugene- oh. Hi,” he said, looking up at the Queen with wide eyes.

“Varian, this is Queen Arianna of Corona,” Eugene said. The Queen waved down at him, and Varian waved back.

“Hi, Varian, you’re Quirin’s son, right?” she said. Eugene was a little surprised that she knew the names of the knights of the Dark Kingdom, but it made sense that she would be kind and attentive enough to know everyone. “I’m about to go see him, would you like to come with me?”

Varian nodded, and the Queen bent down to pick him up. Varian welcomed it, wrapping his arms around her neck as she rested him against her hip. “Bye, Eugene!” Varian waved. Eugene waved back.

The Queen met Eugene’s eye and smiled softly. “I’m supposed to be seeing the royal family of the Dark Kingdom for the first time today in five minutes, I will see you then,” she said with a short nod. Eugene smiled back at her, and she turned to walk away.

~

Eugene knew that not everyone would be as understanding of his and Varian’s games as Queen Arianna was. Over the next few years, the two of them would make sure to only pull their dumb shenanigans when no one important was around.

Besides, everyone was saying Eugene was too old to be doing that kind of thing. What they didn’t understand was that he was doing his best to give Varian a normal childhood. Neither of them got to experience true “normal,” but the least Eugene could do was make sure the kid was happy despite everything.

As Eugene grew up, he was expected to learn more about the kingdom. By the time he was 18 years old, he had gotten sick of hearing about the history of kingdom tragedies, mostly regarding the Moonstone.

“One of these days, you’re going to be king. You have to be prepared for whatever the Moonstone will do,” Edmund told him. Eugene glanced at the perpetually-closed door of the chamber holding the Moonstone.

“Why don’t we just destroy it?” he asked. His father narrowed his eyes, and he swore he could hear the Moonstone buzzing louder than it was before.

“Generations of your ancestors have tried and failed to destroy it. Now we simply leave it alone and smooth over the disasters as best we can. That’s all we can do, end of discussion.”

Eugene watched Edmund walk away, holding his head high like a king. Once he was out of earshot, he groaned to himself and kicked the door. Stupid Moonstone, causing problems all over the kingdom. And his father wouldn’t even think about finding a solution to the problem. Why did he insist on ignoring it?

“Eugene!” Varian yelled as he scurried toward him, snapping Eugene out of his thoughts. “Check this out!”

The boy had gotten a chemistry kit for his ninth birthday and was spending all his time with it. He had a new fascination with everything about science, and Eugene couldn’t believe he was having trouble keeping up with a nine-year-old.

Varian poured one chemical into another, and it fizzled then turned blue. Eugene watched it carefully, waiting for something to happen, but nothing else came. He looked up at Varian, who had a huge grin on his face and was looking expectantly at Eugene. “Oh, uh, cool! Your experiments are really coming along, Var.”

He beamed, practically bouncing up and down with excitement over his chemicals. “Adding one compound into another completely changes the components of the element! Isn’t that cool?”

“Sure!”

Varian rambled about his chemicals for a bit longer as Eugene tried his best to listen, then the kid suddenly stopped himself. “What’s that buzzing sound?”

“I think it’s the Moonstone,” Eugene shrugged. “It just got louder while I was talking to my dad.”

Varian’s eyes widened excitedly. “Let’s check it out!” He strutted towards the door and put his hand on the handle, almost opening it before Eugene grabbed him by the shoulder and pulled him back.

“Hold it, kiddo. We can’t go in there, it’s dangerous, remember?”

“All the Moonstone ever does is sit there, why is it so dangerous to go in?”

Eugene paused, then shrugged. “It just is, I don’t know. Either way, there’s probably nothing interesting in there.”

Varian scrunched up his face at the door. Eugene could tell he wanted to go in, and honestly, he wanted to too. But he knew that it wasn’t worth the trouble they would get in if they went in. “Hey, how about we check out some more of your chemicals? I’m sure there’s plenty of things you haven’t combined yet, right?” he suggested.

Varian brightened back up and nodded. “Yeah! You’re right, there’s a lot more science to discover!” he said, taking Eugene’s arm and dragging him towards the door, the Moonstone completely forgotten about.

If the Moonstone was as dangerous as his father suggested, there was no way Eugene was letting Varian anywhere near it. It was not worth the risk of him getting hurt. He had sworn to himself years ago that he would protect the kid with everything he had, and no magic rock was going to change that.

~

Eugene was 24 when the rocks started appearing everywhere. Black rocks had been common his whole life, but it was getting much worse. Homes were being destroyed left and right, and no one could stop them.

He didn’t know if he could sit through another meeting where everyone’s only solution was to relocate civilians. He wanted to scream that these were all temporary solutions, and they needed to find a way to stop the rocks instead of relocating people every other day.

“You’re relocating people again ?” Eugene yelled as he threw open the door of his father’s office.

Edmund’s hardened gaze fell on him. “I know you want to find another way, but I’ve told you there is no other way. These are the kind of decisions you’ll have to make when you’re king,” he said simply.

“But there has to be something else to do! Why aren’t we finding the root of the problem?”

“We already know that the root of the problem is the Moonstone, but there’s just nothing to do about it.”

“‘Nothing to do about it’?” he shouted, slamming his hand on the desk in front of him. “You won’t even try to do anything about it!”

“There’s nothing to be done!” Edmund shouted back, standing up to meet his son’s eye level. “I’ve told you time and time again that the Moonstone cannot be destroyed!”

“How could you possibly know that? You won’t even let me get close to it!”

“Because I won’t lose you the same way I lost your mother!”

Eugene’s mouth immediately snapped shut. He stared into his father’s eyes. He looked… lost. But that didn’t stop Eugene’s heart from racing as thoughts ran back and forth in his head. His face felt numb, and he couldn’t form the words that were on the tip of his tongue. Edmund sighed to break the silence and sat back down. “I just want to protect us, son.”

“What do you mean by that?” he asked quietly when he found his voice. “You said she died of a sickness.”

Edmund shook his head. “She didn’t. She tried to destroy the Moonstone, and… the Moonstone had other ideas.”

“The Moonstone killed her,” Eugene whispered. His hands tightened into fists and his eyes were trained on the floor. His nails were digging into the palm of his hand, but he didn’t even notice.

“Yes,” Edmund said weakly.

“And you never told me? You didn’t think I would want to know how my mother died?” he spat, his voice slowly rising.

“I couldn’t tell you the truth about the Moonstone, I just needed you to know it’s dangerous . ”

“You couldn’t tell me the truth. You let me believe a lie for years because you ‘couldn’t tell me the truth.’”

“Son, I’m not the bad guy in this story, you know that.”

“Don’t call me son,” Eugene said coldly. “What have you ever done to be able to call me your son?”

He didn’t bother letting him answer. He practically ran out of the room and stormed as far away as he could from the king. He didn’t know where his feet were taking him, he just knew he had to get as far from that office as possible.

He slowly came up with an idea as he marched down the hallways of the castle. He threw open the door to the room he had gone to countless times and walked in. Varian jumped as the door to his lab was slammed open. “Hey, Eugene. You look… unhappy.”

“Yeah,” he grumbled. “You want to go see the Moonstone?”

Varian blinked in surprise. “Really? What about your dad?”

“I don’t care what he thinks. Are you in or not?”

Varian bit his lip, waiting for some kind of explanation. Eugene was breathing heavily, and he had anger etched into every corner of his face. Varian wasn’t sure what to do, but he knew from his expression that Eugene was about to do something dumb, and Varian took it upon himself to make sure he didn’t. “Okay, I’m in.”

“Good.” Eugene grabbed the boy’s arm and practically dragged him away from the lab. Varian tripped over his feet to try to keep up with the determined prince, but Eugene paid no attention to him. His only focus was getting to the Moonstone.

“So, uh, why the change of heart?” Varian asked.

“He’s been lying to me about everything. Now I don’t care what he wants for me, I’m seeing this Stone even if it kills me.”

Varian frowned. “...is it going to kill you?”

“Maybe. Probably not, though.”

Varian was about to object when they arrived at the door of the Moonstone Chamber. Eugene looked at the door with a sense of determination he had never felt before. Without another word, he threw open the doors and came face to face with the Moonstone. He stepped in, not checking to see if Varian was still behind him.

He was still behind, of course. He didn’t want Eugene to go in alone. Not to mention, he had wanted to see the Moonstone for years, too. It had always been forbidden for them to go into the Moonstone Chamber alone, so neither of them ever got the chance to get a good look at it. He looked at the rock in question, glowing softly from its black cage.

Now that they were in the Chamber, they had no idea what they were doing anymore. They had heard the horror stories about the Moonstone, but it didn’t look that scary. It was just floating there. Varian had half-expected it to be a giant murder machine, but it was just a tiny gem.

Eugene took a step closer, and the light it was emitting got subtly brighter. He stopped in his tracks, looking at the Stone.

This was the last thing his mom ever saw. He wondered if the Moonstone was glowing as softly and quietly as it was now, or if it was more… dramatic . It just seemed sad now. He stood still for a moment and watched the Moonstone floating alone in the cage.

“Eugene?” Varian said softly. Eugene turned around and looked back at Varian.

“That’s all I needed,” he said, walking back to the door. He pushed it open and walked out of the Moonstone Chamber.

Varian trailed behind him, his eyebrows knit together as he watched the prince. “Are you okay?”

Eugene paused, then nodded. “Yeah. Let’s get back to your lab, you said you’re working on something cool, right? Flynnoleum?”

“Yeah,” Varian said slowly, not wanting to change the subject so quickly. But clearly, his friend didn’t want to talk about this now. “Yeah, if it works right, I can get hot running water to the whole kingdom.”

“Cool,” Eugene responded, his voice barely steady. “Let’s go check it out.”

~

Ever since that day, everything was the same, but nothing was the same.

They both went back to their lives like usual. Eugene continued to go to meetings to learn about the problems in the kingdom, and Varian continued to work on his experiments. Eugene still spent all his free time in Varian’s lab, watching the kid performing experiments that Eugene didn’t entirely understand. All he did to make himself useful was pass beakers when he was told to. Just like before.

But there was still a weight on both of their shoulders as if something had changed. They learned more about the tragedies of the Moonstone, and they finally understood the burdens their kingdom had borne for centuries. They were each other’s lifeboats in the chaos of what Eugene not-so-lovingly called “The Disaster Kingdom.”

It had been 2 years since they had first visited the Moonstone together, and things had only gotten worse in the kingdom. More rocks were devastating the citizens’ lives every day and no one could stop it. Eugene stopped trying to find solutions, and instead went out and helped as many people as he could in the relocations.

He stayed distant from his father. They talked when they had to, but never more than that. He didn’t mind, though. He had never had a close relationship with Edmund before, at least now they both finally had an excuse.

But one day, everything changed.

Varian knew something was wrong when Eugene didn’t come to visit his lab at the end of the day. He searched through the castle to look for some sign of where the prince went.

His heart dropped when he saw the door of the Moonstone Chamber was standing ajar. He poked his head in to see Eugene standing on the walkway. He was staring at the stone with Adira’s Shadowblade gripped tightly in his right hand.

“Eugene?”

He didn’t turn around to face Varian. He didn’t move at all. “Someone died today.”

“What?”

“Someone died today,” he said again. “A rock shot up into their home and killed her.”

“Oh,” Varian said quietly. “Was it someone you knew?”

“No, but it was someone with a home and a family. And now she’s gone, and her family doesn’t have her anymore. All because of the Moonstone.”

Varian fell silent and looked at the Moonstone. He could have sworn it was glowing brighter than it was last time he saw it.

“I’m going to destroy it.”

Varian’s eyes widened. “You can’t! It’ll kill you!”

Eugene made a noise that sounded like a half-laugh, half-scoff. “It’ll kill me? Just like it’s done to everyone else for the entire history of the kingdom?” he said bitterly. The Moonstone began to hum louder at his words. “It’s already killing people. I’m done just sitting back and hoping it’ll stop.”

“Eugene, there’s got to be a better way to help everyone than walking into death!”

“If you know a better way, I’m all ears! But as far as I can tell, no one can do anything. And apparently, I’m the only one that cares.”

“I care too! I just don’t want to lose you like this.”

Eugene’s shoulders tensed for a moment then fell back down. “That’s not my problem.” He took a step closer to the Moonstone, and it started to shine even brighter.

“Isn’t this the exact same thing that killed your mom?” Varian shouted.

That made him stop. Eugene finally turned around, his eyes narrowed and his hands shaking. He raised the sword at his side and pointed it directly at Varian. “Don’t you dare talk about my mother,” he hissed. Behind him, the Moonstone shot out a burst of light. “You don’t know anything about her.”

“I know enough to know that this could kill you!”

“It doesn’t matter, as long as I can destroy this stupid rock.”

He turned back around and continued his walk towards the Moonstone. It glowed harsher with every step he took, the light almost blinding by the time he was right next to it. Varian’s lip quivered as he watched the closest thing he ever had to a brother drawing his sword and holding it above his head.

“Eugene, wait!” he cried out. Eugene snapped his head to glare at Varian. The kid cleared his throat and took a hesitant step forward. “I… I love you. You’ve always been like family to me, and I- I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Eugene’s face softened, and so did the light emitting from the Moonstone. He slowly lowered the sword to give his full attention to Varian. “Kid, I’m-”

Before he could finish the thought, the Moonstone shot up from the cage like an arrow and floated in midair for a split second. The next thing he knew, it flew to Eugene’s chest, causing him to gasp and fall backward.

“Eugene!”

“Stay back!”

He clutched his chest and tried to claw it away to no avail. It dug deeper in his chest, and he folded in on himself. He squeezed his eyes shut tightly to distract from the burning the Stone was causing as it embedded itself into his skin. He felt Varian’s hand on his shoulder, but he pushed him away. He held his hand out to force the kid to keep a distance. He had no idea what was about to happen, and he didn’t know what he would do if Varian got hurt.

He felt extremely dizzy and his ears were rushing. His eyes were still shut and he couldn’t hear a thing, all he knew was that the Moonstone was searing his chest. He had no idea what was going on around him or to him. It felt like hours, but it couldn’t have been much longer than a minute.

Is this what his mom felt like right before she died?

A rock shot up right next to him, and he reached out to lean on it, desperately trying to catch his breath. The pain was starting to subside and he opened his eyes slowly. He blinked a few times as Varian came into focus in front of him. The kid’s face looked horror-stricken, but thankfully he seemed unscathed. “Kid?”

“You- your- you look-” Varian stuttered.

Eugene looked down and saw that the clothes he had been wearing had been replaced with pitch-black armor made from the rocks, with spikes protruding from the shoulders. The Moonstone had settled into place on his chest. His hair was pitch black, too, the same color as the black rocks across the kingdom.

“Well, that’s… new.”

#got team awesome on the brain wheeeeeeeeeee #originally this was just going to be the two of them vibing in the dark kingdom #but it kinda grew from there lol #eugene appreciation week #tangled #my writing #fanfic #varian #eugene #tangled the series #eugene fitzherbert #team awesome #dark kingdom au

[zombie-boys]

okay. apparently there are fans being mad at will for supposedly "being a jerk" in st3? let me try to break this down.

so apparently some people see the situation as mike trying his best to split his time between el and the rest of the party, and that, even after his breakup, he's willing to humor will and participate in his campaign despite being upset; the argument is that will is being a jerk for being upset at mike, because mike is trying his best to be there for him. to these people, will is ignoring mike's selflessness.

i think more context is needed to really flesh out what's going on...

yes, we do get several scenes of mike interacting with el, and several of him interacting with the party; it's made clear that he isn't devoting all of his time to el, and it's only fair to recognize that. he loves her and had missed her greatly in st2, but he spends time with his friends as well.

however, he isn't there when it really counts.

after dustin comes home from a month away at camp, he's incredibly excited to show his friends cerebro, and additionally introduce them to his girlfriend, suzie. the whole party comes with to set it up, but soon mike seemingly lies about a curfew as an excuse to spend time with el.

dustin had been separated from the party for a considerable amount of time, and when he needs it the most, mike isn't there to show him that their friendship lasted through his absence. dustin has always been insecure about his position amongst his friends, as he was the last to join the og party, so mike's inability to give him the time of day is all the more scathing.

in one of the scenes in which mike is giving his undivided attention to the party, while at the movie, mike shows his concern when will touches the back of his neck, sensing something and looking horrified. will experiences this same feeling again when going to set up cerebro, but notably right after mike leaves; mike isn't there to comfort him anymore.

it's also important to note how will is the only party member to sympathize with dustin and truly welcome him home; both have been alienated from the party.

in st1, mike assures dustin that he cares for his friends equally: lucas, will, and dustin are all his best friends. dustin had been arguing the logic of having more than one best friend, but upon hearing that he was as much a party member as lucas and will, whom mike has known for almost all his life, he concedes, and looks satisfied. his insecurities have been soothed and he doesn't feel alone.

in st2, will feels isolated because of his trauma - everyone has been treating him differently, and he feels like, well, a freak. mike connects to him, and tells him that he's not alone in his feelings - he also feels like he's going crazy. will is comforted by this, as there's someone who understands; he doesn't have to be alone. and he isn't, as mike spends the majority of the season making sure he's okay - quite like how he did in the movie theater in st3.

now, let's think about the st3 ep3 d&d campaign: will has been in need of comfort for the entire season, which is understandable not only because of the trauma he has experienced in the past two seasons, but also because he feels distant from his friends. there are many reasons why will is so attached to the game of d&d, and one of which is how it represents the friendship of the party; it represents comfort and normalcy for him, and so he seeks it out.

as seen in the previous examples, mike sympathizes with his friends' pain and is able to understand when and in what way they're upset; you'd expect him to understand why will wants to play d&d so badly - will himself would expect him to understand, as mike is among the few people in his life who has been able to truly understand him at all.

mike does concede to participating in his campaign, but he clearly doesn't want to, and doesn't take it seriously. he's instantly distracted by the phone ringing, something which never would've happened in st2. even if el showed up in the doorway, mike wouldn't abandon will if he needed comforting.

when mike shows that he doesn't care about the campaign, will is obviously heartbroken. mike doesn't understand him anymore.

while it isn't entirely correct, saying that 'mike is ruining the party' is a completely understandable sentiment from will's perspective: mike has stopped caring about the party's friendship, and has stopped caring about him. mike is the one not noticing something, not will - he is somehow completely blind to the isolation will feels in this rapidly changing landscape.

for all of his life, will has been ostracized for not being stereotypically masculine - because of the way he dresses, his interests, and his personality. he has been bullied at school for it and demeaned by his own father for it - for supposedly being queer. mike has beared witness to this, as we have seen in st1, and fought back passionately. that struggle is one mike understands, sympathizes with, and connects to.

a large portion of the alienation will experiences in st3 stems from not having a girlfriend and not wanting a girlfriend - his friends are less inclined to hang out now that they're dating girls, but aside from that, will is left to stand alone in his queerness because he's not doing the same.

but when he needs it the most, mike isn't there to comfort him. why, he does the exact opposite.

"it's not my fault you don't like girls!"

...responding to will calling el 'stupid', which i recognize is mean, but in no way merits that horribly low blow.

and finally, when mike practically tells him to grow up, will has had enough. he disappears into the storm and escapes to his hiding place...

i don't think mike is a jerk; he clearly has a moral code, but that moral code seems heavily reliant on his emotions at any given moment. y'know, he's a kid: emotional, immature, indecisive, in love. he's been through a lot, but is also just a teenager, and there are social pitfalls he is bound to fall into.

however, it is important to recognize that mike's treatment of dustin and will in st3 is pretty bad, and for the latter, even a breakup won't excuse it. for one thing, at the time, he didn't understand why el broke up with him - even if it wasn't his fault that he lied, he should've at least recognized that it would hurt her feelings.

i get that mike is upset, i understand that he might not be too into d&d at the moment, but if not, he should be honest and suggest a different time to play instead; at the very least he shouldn't target will with the one thing he's been bullied for his entire life. being upset does not excuse that. at all.

i really just want this argument to die down. i see where it comes from, and you are perfectly allowed to dislike will and call him out for the bad things he has done, but framing him as a bad person for seeking comfort from his best friend leaves a bitter taste in my mouth.

(as a note: i don't ship byler, nor do i ship mileven - i'm just here to recognize will and mike's interaction in st3. thank you kindly for your time.)

#stranger things #will byers #mike wheeler #i've tried to make this as respectful as possible #i just want to clear things up #will is definitely allowed to be wrong. you don't have to like him #but mike is also allowed to be wrong... #long post #will's christmas lights

[frederickthegreat]

my thoughts on TUA season 2

(spoilers, obviously)

- opened with Klaus and Ben, my kings. Klaus’s hair looks so weird straightened while short 

- AWESOME opening soundtrack 

- seeing all their powers so controlled makes me wonder how they leveled up to that skill in the alternate timeline. like the only time we saw Klaus use the powers of other ghosts in the correct timeline was when two of them caught him falling out of the sky. however Diego did end up controlling bullets and Allison used her voice to technically kill one of the Swedes

- the homeless man screaming Allison’s name alongside Luther... funny shit

- big teddy bear Hazel

- Elliot was fucking awesome i think he was a great addition as a side character. rip tho :(

- honestly i don’t understand why Diego would WANT to save JFK. like it’s not that big of a deal. does he not understand what messing with the timeline can do??

- Lila... impeccable

- Sissy and Vanya... impeccable <3

- yeah and fuck u Carl

- ugh, Klaus’s beard. disgusting <3

- Ben and Klaus definitely act like they should be, given that they’ve been stuck with each other for over a decade. i’ve seen some people calling Klaus an asshole for not telling his siblings about Ben, which is completely understandable (cause he was an asshole), but I’m guessing it was because he was afraid? that sharing Ben with his siblings would mean that he would lose him to them, or his siblings would find him selfish, or they would ask something of him that he couldn’t give. if that makes sense

- that ghost bitch comment was funny tho 

- to the guy who called Klaus pretty boy at the bar: sir you don’t know what you’re getting into

- Raymond!! he’s such a sweetheart, i really liked him in the show. i’m really happy that Allison has found a bit of normalcy (as normal as the 1960s Civil Rights movement could be). it shows how passionate she is about what she believes in: even though she knows the movement is far from over, even back in 2019, she’s not gonna abandon it

- Allison staring at the moon every night: either thinking about Luther or how the moon blows them all up. maybe both

- of course Luther would be working for Jack Ruby

- awesome cinematography during the mental asylum escape 

- yeah it makes sense that the Handler would still be alive. she was a cool villain. although it would’ve been awesome to see how evil a fish could be

- Diego’s plan was pretty stupid. that’s my boy

- honestly they revealed how Klaus started a cult really well by having one of his followers find him at jail. Klaus, ever the musical aficionado, of course writes his scripture based off of pop songs

- Raymond and Klaus meeting!! that was cool to see how their paths connected

- Lila painting Elliot’s toenails green. ugh i love that crazy bitch

- i LOVE how they incorporated the umbrella man!! tbh i’ve always believed he was the one behind the assassination. Lee Harvey Oswald was framed 

- honestly a bit understandable that Luther was planning on killing Vanya? cause he had no idea who she is now, but them reuniting was actually really sweet. he’s grown up so much

- the Swedes and their cats.

- the Umbrella company building with the nuclear family mannequins... creepy, awesome shit

- baby pogo baby pogo baby pogo baby pogo

- shanked diego shanked diego shanked diego shanked diego

- did anyone else get vibes from Klaus’s episode opening that he was an escort to the old woman? like how he was being shown off at her arm or something and getting out of jail from a call from the governor. idk maybe the lady was just very taken with him, as anyone would be

- Elliot, our helpful king

- Allison and Klaus’s reunion was so sweet!! i’m so glad they got to interact so much more in this season 

- Ben getting Raymond out through a haunting... hilarious

- sweet intimate moment between Lila and Diego

- Ray meeting Luther was hilarious, but i do feel for the poor guy. i mean i’m not in love with my adoptive sister but still

- the sit-in was really well done and beautiful while terrible. the ‘riot’ that ensued was very appropriate for today’s setting 

- D-Dave

- honestly i was scared that Klaus was gonna be overly attracted to him or whatever, which would be weird cause he’s years younger than Klaus, but honestly, at the core he just wanted to save Dave’s life. even if it means never meeting him in a different timeline. he truly loved Dave. and that ptsd flashback was done so well

- i knew Lila wasn’t trustworthy but i didn’t REALLY expect that! 

- Vanya and Luther talking with each other, Luther admitting the apocalypse wasn’t all her fault. beautiful

- the Majestic 12 reminds me of the conspiracy theory that only a few families control basically everything in the world. the Majestic 12 may be based off of that, idk

- idk about everyone else but Klaus’s scorpion and the frog story made total sense to me! frogs ARE bitches

- the diner scene.... ugh. it really shows that the two of them did fall in love and they did stupid in love things, like talking about their family, about why Dave wanted to join, favorite colors, favorite foods, etc. however that’s seen later on when Dave visits the compound

- yes it’s very disheartening when Klaus is attacked, but honestly i think it had to happen, just like the riot had to happen. the 60s weren’t a fun time for lgbt people and poc. it was only going to be a matter of time before the show HAD to acknowledge the consequences of Klaus’s ‘flamboyancy’ in 1963 Texas. it doesn’t make it right or easy to see, but it’s realistic. 

- it also makes sense that Klaus fell off the wagon after experiencing something like that. yes we all would’ve liked him to stay sober, but sobriety and recovery aren’t linear. 

- Allison is so happy with Ray can we please drop this pseudo-incest plotline let’s MOVE ON 

- Texas Grace ! who is not actually Grace rip (i think? i was a bit confused lol)

- the scene with Harlan running off was really upsetting but we got to see those weird light particles that we saw in the first season

- Pogo Pogo Pogo Pogo

- Klaus being a dick to Ben again, as brothers do. i do feel bad for Ben though it must be sooo frustrating. that scene with him and Allison was really sweet and funny tho

- i just have to say that Luther and Diego are so fucking funny this season it’s awesome. like there are a LOT of good lines overall by everyone but they’re hilarious. “At least he didn’t shank my ass” “no bro, he shanked your heart”“Dads part of a sinister CABAL that’s plotting on killing the president.” “a caBAL?”“You two still a thing? *leans in* do we need to talk?” “No, she’s married.” “Woah dude... that’s rough.” and countless others

- the sibling reunion!! 

- Klaus really does get left out of everything tbh

- Ben :(

- sisters and Klaus!! that was so awesome to see. and Klaus’s hairpins, Vanya saying she’s gonna tell Sissy she loves her, their dance sequence, Klaus calling Allison out on that incest. beautiful

- the fucking Swedish cover of Hello was PERFECT i mean i was sad for the Swedes but it was hilarious. there were a couple beautiful shots of the boat on fire though

- god it must’ve been so traumatizing for Allison to be thrust into such a hostile place with no voice and no way to contact her family

-  idk about you guys but long live Team Zero

- calling Ben that he was becoming their father was a bit uncalled for 

- the fact that Klaus didn’t help Dave’s chances, and in fact escalated Dave’s own timeline.. his trembling hands... robert sheehan is an amazing actor

- the Black president bit lmaoo loved it

- the way Reginald spoke to Diego.. i’m gonna throw hands with an old man

- Klaus LITERALLY looked like he was having a seizure and they all just... played it off?? 

- poor, poor Carl. nah fuck him lol

- that bloody opening scene was awesome! and thank god Five got to say fuck. the fact that it was about a candy bar makes too much sense

- Robert Sheehan acting as Ben: amazing showstopping spectacular he’s so talented

- the whole multiple Fives and Luther bit was honestly really funny, and i immensely respect smaller Five over bigger Five. 

- yes Klaus, you survived a family of seven. you got this

- not sad about Carl dying one bit!

- Ben... that was such a beautiful scene. not just the content of the scene, but the cinematography. Ben fading away... Vanya hugging him... ugh. the main takeaway i had from that scene is that at the core of it all, Ben and Klaus love each other immensely. they have a weird, dysfunctional, fucked up relationship, where Klaus is an asshole and Ben definitely shouldn’t of possessed him without his consent, but they’re still brothers, and Ben forgives him. 

- oof Ben’s funeral was hard. also was it just me or did Klaus’s kid actor sound weird? like it sounded like Robert was dubbing his lines 

- all the siblings back together again!!!! Klaus going with Vanya to save Harlan!! Vanya telling him Ben forgives him and that it wasn’t Klaus’s fault Ben got stuck with him!! everyone in the car!!! be still my beating heart

- yeah didn’t see Lila having powers coming tbh. i really feel bad for her she’s had such a rough and traumatic life, especially with the Handler as her only parental figure

- the Swede brother and Five putting down their weapons: “enough.” the Swede wanted revenge for his brothers - an eye for an eye, but there was a mutual understanding between the two of them: they would do anything for their family. if the Swede hurts one of the Hargreeves, Five would never stop coming after him. i thought it was very beautiful 

- mmm Reggie’s foreshadowing coming into play. proud of u Five

- the ending was so beautiful. everyone got closure in some type of way. except now Klaus is alone with nothing but his dog tags :(

- EMO BEN HAHAHA WTFFF?? is Lila in the sparrow academy? why was Ben’s portrait over the mantle piece? did Five disappear?? is the sparrow academy just older versions of the siblings who stuck around?? so many questions

FINAL THOUGHTS

- Ellen Page’s acting consistently blows me away. she is amazing 

- beautiful cinematography, funny writing, pretty good acting. i didn’t like the soundtrack as much as i did the first season’s, but some of it wasn’t bad.

- i’m glad ben got peace, but i’m also glad justin min isn’t gone for good. his social media presence is too vital for us

- i swear to god if they keep treating klaus as a joke and don’t let him get any actual development like everyone else had (he barely got closure with Dave, he reconciled with Ben through a second party) next season, i’m gonna riot. PLEASE i want to learn more about his powers now that Ben is gone. what happened to seeing tons of ghosts when he’s sober??

- Luther and Diego were probably my favorite duo of the season, I’m so happy that they’ve reconciled and are bonding more. 

- just seeing Vanya grow and be happy was amazing 

all in all, really wonderful season. i probably liked it better than the first one. now it’s time to consume fanfiction and maybe finish my own (check out “god doesn’t want him and neither does the devil” on ao3!)

#the umbrella academy #tua spoilers #tua season 2 spoilers #the umbrella academy season 2 spoilers #the umbrella academy season 2 #tua season 2 #klaus hargreeves #luther hargreeves #vanya hargreeves #five hargreeves #ben hargreeves #allison hargreeves #raymond chestnut #dave katz #diego hargreeves #reginald hargreeves

[jess-rewatches-prodigalson]

Bad Manners (S2, E5)

My time-stamped thoughts for this episode. As always I reference Malcolm’s mental health. A lot. So if that’s going to be a trigger for you, don’t keep reading.

SPOILERS AHEAD:

0:35 - Martin totally thought John Watkins abducted and killed Ainsley. Mark my words. 

0:44 - Holy. Shit. Ainsley is FIVE years old (or younger) here right? A five year old with that much determination?!?! She literally stayed silent in that clock for probably hours......and no one was concerned about this kid when Martin was arrested because...?

1:09 - Anyone else impressed with Malcolm’s aim here? Just me?

1:20 - Gil and Malcolm talking about sleep and murder is so freaking sweet. <3 Honestly, they’re acting like friends instead of co-workers and it warms my cold dead heart. 

1:29 - Does Gil become a grumpy old man when he doesn’t get 8 hours sleep? I really want to know now. 

1:39 - OMG. Gil pointing at Ainsley here is hilarious. He’s totally acting like some weird mix of a stern pissed off high-school teacher, and a step-dad trying to discipline an unruly teen. hahaha AND MALCOLM’S FACE. Look how done Malcolm is. He looks so so tired, sad, and exasperated. 

1:44 - Wow. Girl power. Ainsley has those camera guys bending to her will. I honestly would’ve thought they would just read the situation and turn the camera off themselves. 

1:47 - “It’s not a game.” Yikes. I have thoughts about this:

Malcolm is right - it’s not a game. 

Malcolm is a bit of a hypocrite for saying that to Ainsley. Although, to his credit even when Malcolm is excited/inappropriately happy about murder it’s always pretty clear that he thinks murder is wrong, and that he has sympathy for the victims and their families. 

Ainsley does not have that same sympathy for the victims. That much is clear later in this episode. 

Pretty sure the writers are trying to turn Ainsley into a serial killer this season. 

2:13 - “You know I like to share these things with my friends.” .....does this mean Malcolm thinks Dani and JT are his friends now? Last I checked (Ep 1x05) Malcolm didn’t have friends. This absolutely melts my heart. <3 I’m honestly so happy that Malcolm considers someone other than Gil to be his friend.

2:18 - “We lost Dani to vice.” .....What is vice? AND WHAT IS THE REAL LIFE REASON THAT DANI WASN’T IN THIS EPISODE?!? 

2:19 - Edrisa has a medical degree right? She has to know how dangerous consuming that much caffeine is right? Plus aren’t energy drinks super dangerous if you drink a lot of them (or maybe that’s just what adults in my neighbourhood told kids)?

2:30 - Edrisa SHINES in this episode. She’s so funny and awkward and I just love her. 

2:36 - hahaha Gil has adopted the whole team. Look at him throwing the “Dad warning stare” at Edrisa. 

3:31 - Why does Edrisa start bouncing around looking upset when Malcolm says, “rejection is a powerful motivator”?!?! Has she recently been broken up with or something? Is this a reference to how she has a crush on Malcolm (who doesn’t reciprocate)? I WANT MORE INFORMATION.

3:47 - TWIZZLERS!!! <3 Damn I love how this tiny detail about Malcolm’s character keeps coming up. 

3:55 - Ainsley is on a rampage this episode. She’s so determined ...actually she’s acting a lot like Jessica (think girl in the box bracelet). However, unlike Jessica, Ainsley’s motives aren’t about justice or the safety of her loved ones.  Ainsley is chasing personal gain (career) with a side of (a subconscious?) need to be exposed to murder and her father’s twisted world. 

4:05 - This whole interaction between Ainsley and Malcolm is really interesting. Ainsley is knowingly manipulating Malcolm to get the answers she wants. We’ve seen her do it in 2x4 and 1x19. She knows her big brother would do anything for her. It makes sense, they’re five years apart and after the trauma they experienced as children Malcolm felt responsible to protect Ainsley. He never wants to disappoint Ainsley. Not a burden he should’ve had to deal with but I digress. PLUS Malcolm looks weary of Ainsley here. He knows what she’s doing. He’s scared that she’s turning to the dark side. But he still gives her the answers because if he doesn’t - that means something has changed. He thinks that would make Ainsley suspicious and then she might remember what happened to Endicott. He’s scared of and for Ainsley. 

4:32 - OKAY. I’ll say it. The thing that annoys me the most about this episode is that it suggests that Ainsley was a debutant when in 1x6 AINSLEY TELLS MARTIN SHE WAS NEVER A DEBUTANT. She went to etiquette school - I guess that doesn’t strictly mean she also did debutant balls but it sort of suggests it in the context of this episode? Did she actually graduate from the etiquette school (there was bullying, maybe she was expelled/dropped out similar to Malcolm and Remington?)?

4:59 - “No stabbies” OMG. How is this show not classified as a comedy?!? Istg I laugh harder watching this ‘drama’ then I do watching most of the shows that call themselves ‘comedies’.

5:35 - It’s honestly kind of amazing that Ainsley and Malcolm are as ‘sane’ as they are. They were raised by a stubborn predatory psychopath and a stubborn rich meddling socialite. They had no chance of normalcy. Look at the amount of pleasure Martin is currently getting by throwing his son under the bus with regards to Jessica. 

 5:45 - “No actually, I cleaned it up.”.....does this have a dual meaning? Did Martin do something to make Malcolm dispose of the body? We already know that Martin has tried some sort of conditioning on Malcolm (remember ‘C’mon boy!’ from 1x14? The stabbing?). What if Martin said some sort of trigger word to control Malcolm and coerced Malcolm into getting rid of the body? What if this isn’t the first time?

6:05 - Ainsley is a sociopath. I’m calling it again. I called it when I first watched Q&A (1x7) because the way she treated Malcolm was more than just selfish/careless. It was cruel and she didn’t feel any remorse for literally broadcasting her brother’s private health details on television. That is messed up. I honestly won’t be shocked if the writers make Ainsley a full blown serial killers (although I’m not sure I want that because I don’t know how Malcolm would remain the main character if the story goes in that direction?). 

6:12 - Poor Jessica. I honestly feel really bad for her. Sure, she’s a headstrong alcohol dependant crazy rich woman. She also has a good heart. She’s been dealt a pretty shitty hand when it comes to relationships (minus Gil but she ruined that because she’s a MORON) and now she’s terrified that her own children have become monsters and she blames herself. She definitely hasn’t been a perfect mother but I don’t think she’s to blame for Ainsley and Malcolm’s obsession with murder. If these kids had a different bio dad, they would probably just have a low-key drug problem or some other common rich kid baggage. 

6:15 - “You know that’s not how cancer works right?” LOL. hahahaha

6:33 - Martin kind of has a point. There’s no rehab for murder. That’s why he’s been in jail for 20 years and he still wants to kill people. In my opinion, given what we’ve seen of Ainsley’s personality: as soon as she fully remembers that night - she’s gone. She’ll go full serial killer and Jessica and Malcolm will lose her forever. 

6:40 - Jessica’s little jazz hand finger twinkle as she spins on her heel and leaves Martin kills me. It’s so extra. It’s so funny. And it’s sooo Jessica. 

6:47 - Damn. Martin is pissed. I’m worried. That’s murder-level rage. If he escapes ISTG Martin is going to try and kill Gil. For so many reasons 1) because he hates Gil, 2) it’ll hurt Jessica, and 3) killing Gil will eliminate his ‘Dad’ competition. 

6:54 - Edrisa on caffeine is AMAZING.

7:43 - I love Edrisa but her blatant, unreciprocated crush on Malcolm is honestly getting a little creepy. 

7:52 - Gil spent all last season drinking out of a Yankee’s mug. Doesn’t that mean he’s a baseball fan? Why doesn’t he know this pitcher guy?

7:56 - hahahaa “Where is JT?” Because obviously JT is the team sports fan. 

8:22 - Does Gil get nightmares about cases? He always seems really uncomfortable around the dead bodies. 

8:45 - “And suddenly I’m wide awake” SERIOUSLY - is anyone else laughing every 60 seconds when they watch this show? Is my sense of humour just super dark and messed up?

8:54 - YES. The liquorice is BACK.

9:00 - I love Malcolm talking to JT about his obsession with candy. I love how Malcolm doesn’t even hesitate before giving JT an honest answer. Malcolm is acting like JT’s annoying little brother and I am here for it. One thing I did notice though - Malcolm specifically mentions candy+dopamine but doesn’t mention his depression/anxiety. Processed sugar can be a short-term (unhealthy) way to boost your mood. It’s why some people eat their feelings. I really want more backstory about Malcolm with the lollipops and licorice though. 

9:19 - “But you didn’t do anything wrong.” Awwww Malcolm is so soft here. I love how much he genuinely cares about JT. <3 I love how JT is comfortable enough with Malcolm to give him an honest answer. <3 THEIR RELATIONSHIP HAS GONE THROUGH SUCH A GLOW UP. <3 

9:32 - “Like toy dolls?” hahaha the way Malcolm perked up here. All I could think was “SQUIRREL!” hahaha. 

9:41 - Malcolm is doing better than he has been the past few episodes? I mean he’s still suffering and he’s still in a terrible mental state. BUT he also seems happier? IDK maybe he’s just entered the more manic nervous energy stage of his emotions as opposed to the depressed and scared stage. 

9:49 - “Deep childhood trauma”. So we’re looking for a debutant killer with childhood trauma who is chasing perfection? Debutant = rich lady culture. Like Ainsley. AND Ainsley went to the same etiquette school as the first two victims. The writer’s wanted us to assume the killer was Ainsley for the first 15 mins of this episode right? I’m not the only one seeing it?

10:04 - “My sister went there too.” ....why is there something super attractive about the way that line was delivered?

10:08 - I’m so done with this absolute tom foolery. Why does the team keep splitting up into two teams - where one team is JUST MALCOLM. The one who is unarmed and technically a civilian?!? This makes no logical sense to me (except for plot).

10:25 - Was Martin just about to say, “Just like the old days”?!? Is Martin referring to Endicott? OR is Martin referring to something that Malcolm’s repressed from his childhood?

10:30 - “I always root for the bad guys.” .....finally some truth from Martin.

10:40 - Soooooo I guess Mr. David doesn’t know? I promise you Mr. David has suspicions though. How could he not?!?!

11:24 - “It was brutal for Ains.” Look at how sad Malcolm is! Ugh. This hurts so much. He clearly loves his sister so so much and what she’s done is slowly killing him. I honestly think that part of the reason Malcolm helped Ainsley dispose of the body is that Malcolm doesn’t want to loose his sister. His sister is one of the only good things he’s always been able to count on. If word gets around that she’s a killer - Malcolm’s fragile world gets shattered a little more and I don’t know if Malcolm can recover mentally from that. 

11:36 - “Teasing made her capable of...stuff.” C’MON. There’s no way Mr. David doesn’t know. 

11:45 - Sooo is Martin saying that he recognized that Ainsley was a sociopath when she was a small child? Or did she just respond to his (or John Watkins’) grooming much ‘better’ than Malcolm?

11:56 - “Because she’s her mother’s” Okay. So I see the point. I can see that Ainsley is driven and stubborn like Jessica. BUT it feels like Martin is suggesting that Jessica is capable of murder? Which - I honestly don’t think she is. If anything - Malcolm is more like Jessica than Ainsley is.

11:59 - There was a look in Martin’s eyes when he was comparing Ainsley to Jessica that really freaked me out. I can’t figure out why. It makes me wonder if Martin still somehow views Jessica as ‘his possession’ (he refers to her as his wife all the time but I always assumed that was just to get a rise out of people?). Martin’s dream from 2x4 certainly suggests that he still wants Jessica romantically. I honestly think he’s going to try to escape and rekindle the romance with Jess; and it’s going to go very poorly when Jessica rejects him. 

12:06 - Preach JT. Preach. This is creepy af. 

13:00 - Ugh. Of course this creep has a history of indecent exposure. Now I understand why Gil and JT were hostile with the dude right from the start. 

13:12 - Man. People will use the Bible to justify anything. No wonder people hate Christians ( I say this as a practicing Christian).

13:18 - JT is such a good dude. I’m so glad he’s a dad now. <3 He’s going to be such a good one. <3

13:26 - “One phone call and this place will be shut down.” OH SHIT. GIL THAT IS VICIOUS AND I RESPECT THE SHIT OUT OF IT.

13:35 - I soooo thought that dude was going to sprint out of that room. 

14:30 - THIS. YES. This is why I have a problem with Ainsley’s enthusiasm for murder vs. Malcolm’s. Ainsley’s enthusiasm is centred on her nee to ‘get the story’. She’s obsessed with forwarding her career and as a result she’s treating crime like a competitive sport. Malcolm’s obsession (while it can border on creepy and reckless) is always centred on his need to find the killer and stop the murders. Malcolm is seeking justice and his heart is in the right place. I can’t say the same for Ainsley.

14:31 - “We’re brother and sister, everything is a competitive sport”.....whoever wrote this doesn’t have a sibling they experienced trauma with as a kid (and as a result was raised by a single parent). Seriously, my dad was abusive he lived with us until I was 10 and my brother was 7. Then my parents got divorced and my mom was a single parent (he didn’t pay child support or see his kids after the divorce). Are my brother and I competitive? Sure sometimes. But the way we grew up forced us to become partners. Annoyed with Mom? Let’s rant about it together. Is he struggling in math? I’ll tutor him in exchange for a Reese cup. Am I struggling at daycare because I have massive social anxiety? He’ll include me in whatever he’s doing so I’m not sitting alone in a corner. My point: siblings who experience trauma together don’t have the typical sibling relationships that are widely televised in North America. There’s a lot less fighting and competition and a lot more teaming up and commiserating. 

14:39 - “It. It’s terrible.” - Notice how Ainsley didn’t actually say how it made her feel? She gave the standard “TV response” to a murder “a terrible/horrific/tragedy has occurred”. She doesn’t feel bad that these women are dead. She’s too consumed with getting a story to even stop and let herself feel anything. I’ve been saying it since last season - the way Ainsley shows no regard for other people and their feelings when she’s obsessed with her job is concerning. 

14:50 - “Remind me of the people who cut us off after Dad’s arrest.” ...Are you kidding me?!? The whole fandom has been speculating about this since early season one and they’re not going to elaborate on that line?!? I’m going to need some more information about this and it better be in the upcoming episode where Jessica’s younger sister appears. 

15:40 - She thinks of her students as family? Sooo what does she think of Ainsley? Wasn’t Ainsley bullied at this school? Did she do anything about it? 

16:00 - this is like a ‘weekend/evening school’ right? Kids aren’t living in this house like a boarding school/summer camp?

16:01 - “Mr. Whitly” UGH. This bitch preaches etiquette and she doesn’t even have the common courtesy to call Malcolm by the name with which he introduced himself? Nah. I don’t like her. 

16:13 - Ugh. Ainsley, seriously? Why don’t you help your brother solve the case. AND PREVENT MORE MURDERS. Why are you indirectly but purposely obstructing justice?

16:37 - “Of course.” Huh. Do you think Martin might try and manipulate Ainsley into killing Malcolm? Ainsley definitely capable of it. She doesn’t actually seem to care about Malcolm nearly as much as he cares about her. 

17:17 - WTF?!? That’s creepy af. How did no one in this show think this assistant was a suspect? She has a super creepy doll that she ‘forgot’ on the floor the middle of a hallway. AND THE DOLL WAS STANDING UP. Not sitting, not dropped carelessly, STANDING UP.

17:30 - Look at Malcolm’s face. He’s definitely going to be having nightmares about that doll. 

18:25 - OMG. This was amazing. JT just totally bulldozed his way into catching that dude. Very badass. Also kind of funny (maybe that’s just my messed up sense of humour again?).

18:44 - Ugh. This dude has a thing for dolls. I don’t want to kink shame but - no. no. There’s something really gross about that.  

18:48 - I’ve seen some people say that this doll looks like Ainsley and how that’s supposed to be some sort of foreshadowing/symbolism. I kind of see it? I mean the hair colour is similar and if you pause the screen at 18:48 the angle kind of looks like Ainsley? It would be an interesting metaphor though - Ainsley played with dolls as a little girl. John Watkins gave her angel statues. She is Watkins’ and Martin’s doll’ in the sense that she was the object that murders manipulated/groomed. 

18:53 - Then again, pause the screen here and there’s something about the facial structure that looks like Dani to me. 

19:00 - Jessica lets Ainsley work in the murder office?!? No. No she doesn’t. This is garbage. Jessica would’ve forbade it. Jessica would’ve bordered up this room immediately after Watkins.

19:57 - Poor Jessica. She’s clearly terrified that she’s losing Ainsley and terrified of Ainsley. BUT Jess, sweetie, running to Europe won’t fix this. 

20:16 - “She wanted the dolls to look like her students.” AND PEOPLE SEND THEIR CHILDREN TO HER?!? WTF?!? NO. NO. NO. NOT OKAY. 

20:31 - HAHA look at Gil’s face when Trevor tells him he can make the ‘perfect woman’. Gil’s like WTF - can I arrest you for thinking you can fabricate a ‘perfect woman’?!!?

21:06 - Malcolm is having so much fun playing with Trevor’s doll head. Look at how excited he is. It’s kind of adorable but his manic energy is showing which is concerning. 

21:10 - Why is Trevor giving his doll fancy 1940s(ish) names? 

21:31 - Props to LDP. I honestly believed Gil was annoyed with Malcolm for barging in on the interrogation the first time I watched this. 

21:42 - “They got a word for everything.” hahaha OMG. This is so reminiscent of a teenager explaining some new tech to their tech-illiterate parents. 

22:00 - I can’t tell if Gil feels sorry for this creep or if he just thinks the dude is really gross. Probably a mixture. 

23:00 - Oh we’re bringing up the chloroform again. At least Malcolm knows not listen to Martin about this nonsense. 

23:25 - “It doesn’t feel fun.” - THIS. This is why I honestly don’t think Malcolm will ever become a serial killer. His guilt complex is just too big.

23:56 - Are. You. Kidding. Me? This is next level. Ainsley is so out of line here. AND SHE SHOWS NO REMORSE. SHE DOESN’T THINK SHE’S DONE ANYTHING WRONG. THIS GIRL HAS GONE DARK SIDE (she was already halfway there).

24:17 - I’m getting papa!Gil vibes when Gil is talking to Ainsley and I want more scenes of them interacting. Seriously, did Gil have a relationship with Ainsley when she was a kid? I MUST KNOW.

24:45 - Ainsley has no conscience. I honestly don’t think Ainsley has a conscience. 

25:00 - “Who is that!?” Malcolm is totally acting like he’s Ainsley’s father-figure right now. I’m here for it. 

25:22 - SORE LOSERS?!? I’m sorry. What? If you weren’t concerned about Ainsley you damn well should be now. That is seriously messed up. People are dead. This is not a game. Do you know who else thought murder was a game? Martin Whitly.

25:31 - Okay. Ainsley has a point. Malcolm lecturing anyone about being reckless is pretty hypocritical. But at least Malcolm cares about her. 

25:54 - Heart. Shattered. Look at how terrified Jessica is. Look at how gentle and reassuring Gil is. UGh. WHY DID SHE BREAK UP WITH HIM??! I mean, I know why I just think she’s a moron for doing it. 

26:00 - Poor Gil. He’s so confused and so concerned. The whole Whitly family is acting crazier then usual and he doesn’t know why. 

26:11 - “Both you and Malcolm are at an 11 and I’ve never seen Ainsley like that.” FIND YOURSELF A MAN WHO CARES LIKE GIL AND NEVER LET HIM GO. <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 Seriously. The love and concern he shows for this family warms my cold dead heart. 

26:16 - “Her father?!” Oh shit. Now Gil knows there’s something BIG happening. Jessica would never run to Martin unless she absolutely had to. 

26:19 - annnnd Gil’s also being a prideful man who’s feeling are hurt. “You went to him?” He’s right to be though - the woman he loves went to a serial killer for advice before going to the guy who practically co-parented with her. 

26:33 - “I’m here. Whatever you need. I’m here.” <3 <3 Gil is the definition of a good man. <3 I’m in love with it. 

26:48 - “You were right on time for me.” ....*snort* subtle Gil (and in front of JT!!)

27:08 - Edrisa is hysterical on caffeine. hahaha. This whole scene is perfect. 

27:20 - You know someone is acting manic when Malcolm Bright is concerned about their eccentric behaviour. 

27:34 - Annnnnd Tom Payne was a split second from breaking character here. I don’t blame him. hahaha

28:05 - EDRISA flipping and dropping that pencil. HAHAHAHAHAHA

29:10 - “Absolutely not.” hahaha this is funny but also really sweet. Malcolm knows that Edrisa hopped up on caffeine isn’t safe to have near an active killer. Who knows what’ll happen. I wish he’d care that much about his own well being. Looks like calling for backup last episode was a one time thing. 

30:37 - I’ll give the writers one thing - Miss Windsor makes a convincing murder suspect.

31:22 - GIL. STANDING. UP. FOR. JT. IS. EVERYTHING. Where is O’Malley’s back up? Oh yeah, they’re not brave enough to defend him.

32:00 - Huh. Bright texted for backup. This is growth. I’m proud of him. 

32:15 - YES. This JT arc was handled right. Sure JT could’ve complained. It would’ve been episodes upon episodes of bureaucratic nightmares and injustice. This show isn’t about racism. They showed enough to portray that the system is broken and they had JT act like a responsible adult. It’s not fair that JT had to go through this or that he’ll likely experience something similar to it again. But the fact that JT is acting like a bigger person is perfect. JT will protect his family. Always. That includes Malcolm. So JT avoids putting through a formal complaint because he knows that will take time away from doing his job, from protecting others, from hanging out with his wife and kid. JT’s taking the higher road, it might not be gratifying or fair but I respect the hell out of him for taking it. 

32:28 - Gil is so so proud of JT. Look at him. <3 <3 

33:40 - Look, Miss Windsor is a bit of a stuck up bitch but she has a good heart. Look at the way she immediately tells Malcolm where Ainsley is when she realizes what’s happening. 

34:14 - This confused me during the first watch - Ainsley obviously didn’t drink any tea - so why is she drugged? (obviously I know now). 

34:17 - Big brother Malcolm frantically looking for Ainsley is so so sweet. <3 

35:42 - The music, the dolls, and Miss Windsor’s speech here. There’s something about this part of the episode that is strangely reminiscent of 5x16 of Criminal Minds.

36:20 - ......does Miss Windsor have some sort of mental illness? She’s talking to herself and ranting erratically. Is this just emotional stress or something deeper?

37:00 - This is why Malcolm’s not a serial killer. Even now- looking at a killer - he’s trying to sympathize with her. He’s trying to understand why. He’s trying to calm her down, diffuse the threat, and get her mental help. 

39:00 - Oh yeah. Ainsley was definitely going to kill without remorse. Again. I’ve seen some theories that Ainsley only ever tries to kill to protect Malcolm. I disagree. I think Ainsley’s trying to protect herself. Ainsley is pissed off that this girl tried to drug her and kill her because she thinks Ainsley is wicked. Ainsley was pissed at Endicott for whatever he did to Ainsley before Malcolm got there. I think Ainsley felt threatened and scared so she reacted. I don’t think this has anything to do with protecting Malcolm.

39:41 - Malcolm isn’t a killer. Look. He smells gas but he takes the time to carry an unconscious murderer (who literally just tried to kill his sister) out of the building. 

40:00 - The drama. Holy hell. What a weird ending to this case.

40:48 - Who gave Ainsley a police jacket and let her keep it?

41:14 - She almost died and she’s still obsessing over ‘winning’. This is seriously unstable behaviour. Way more concerning than anything Malcolm’s done since 2x1. 

41:45 - “My father was a serial killer also.” Anyone else super irritated by that phrasing?!?  Just me?!? Something about the ‘also’ feels super wrong to me.

41:53 - Oh sweetie. I’d argue that you are more messed up than Malcolm. 

42:06 - Jessica went to see Martin twice in one episode. THIS IS BAD.

42:15 - “Maybe even more so than Malcolm if that’s possible.” Jessica knows her kids. I’m on her side here. 

42:20 - Martin is way too happy about Ainsley showing signs of serial killing. 

42:30 - Jessica? You married an act. That man never existed. He’s always been a serial killer. You just didn’t know it. He’s manipulative and you were a victim to it. 

42:50 - “A partner.” OH THIS IS NOT GOING TO END WELL. ESPECIALLY FOR THE GIL/JESSICA ARC.

Okay....so definitely the weakest episode of the season so far. AND the fact that we got no mention of Tally and/or the baby this episode is a crime. 

BUT I’M SO SO SO EXCITED FOR THE NEXT EPISODE. It’s going to be a televised fanfic and I can’t wait. 

#jess-rewatches-prodigal #malcolm bright #prodigal son #gil arroyo #dani powell #JT Tarmel #ainsley whitly #martin whitly #edrisa tanaka #jessica whitly #I LOVE this show #whump #rewatch #spoliers #malcolm needs a hug #ps #so good #2x05 #2x5 #Bad Manners #s2

[a-pretty-nerd]

Run (Jasper Jordan x Reader College!Au)

Request: “Hoi I wanna request a story sadly I don’t have Patreon though so u prob won’t make it hehe. It’s a Jasper Jordan x reader fan fic also I would love if it a High school/college Au and the readers parents don’t approve Jasper so she has to sneak out every time she wants to meet him but soon she finds out she’s pregnant so she runs away with him? Also your work is amazing!” ~ @deadqueeen 

A/N: I was just about to say, “I’ve never done a college au before, uwu!” but I forgot about that entire self indulgent smut I wrote…big Oof. Anyways, love this idea, I love some good ol’ fashioned angst. Just a warning though, I did end up leaning heavily into the relationship reader has with their parents so just be prepared for some upsetting interactions. 

If you like my work, don’t be afraid to interact! Gimme a like, comment, message, send a request my way if you like! And if you’d like to support me further, go ahead and check out my Patreon!  I’d love to see you there!

Trigger Warnings: Mild Smut, Parental abuse, petting crime, and Pregnancy. 

College was stressful as it is, but as the months passed, things were getting harder and harder to manage. Come your freshman year, a little thing called Covid-19 hit the world, sending it into a whirlwind of stress and unease.You sat in the shower, letting the warm water fall over your aching body as you stared blankly at your knees. After your panic attack you were left void of emotion and thought, sitting there wondering what to do and how to move. The water was a calming reminder that you were still present and very much alive.

Things had changed very quickly and yet it felt like that change took forever to get to you. Covid hit right before the end of your freshman year, forcing you to move back in with your parents until it “passed.” But it wasn’t passing and now you were starting your sophomore year at home.As stressful as it was, you missed school. You missed your friends, your dorm room, even your part-time job. But most of all, your freedom. You missed the carefree way in which you lived in the dorms. You had a taste or real life and you craved more.

You were trapped, for lack of a better word, imprisoned in your childhood home. You spent days without leaving the confines of it’s walls in a failed attempt to keep you safe and focused on school. Your parents weren’t always so strict, but they made it clear that school should be your top priority and anything else was an unwelcome distraction. Things like your boyfriend, were merely a hindrance to your education.You met Jasper your first day in the dorms. He was bright and smiling like an excited puppy, eager and willing to make new friends and new experiences. You quickly became friends, and then a little more. Before you knew it, the two of you were inseparable. He made you feel so wild and free. He nurtured the fun, carefree side of you that you didn’t even know existed. He cared for you in ways no one ever had before. He was so funny and kind and genuine. He gave you the tools to grow, and with his, you bloomed.

When the pandemic hit, it devastated the two of you. Being isolated and kept from one another proved too much to bare. You remember the first night you snuck out with him, terrified of alerting your parents. They hated Jasper, they forbade you from seeing him. Told you he’d do nothing but keep you down and stifle your potential. If only they could see how happy he made you. If only, they cared.Jasper would creep around to your backyard and gently tap at your bedroom window. 12 am, they’d always be asleep, the perfect time to make a quick get away and then 6am, you’d sneak back through your window.

The adrenaline of misbehaving always drove you crazy. Sneaking around in the dark of the night, stealing chased kisses from one another until it was too much to handle. You fell into each other’s arms almost every night, desperate kisses and moans in between the sound of skin slapping against skin. He made your hair curl.You were his first. He was awkward and silly at times but you whipped him into shape real quick. And now, he was a well trained boy toy ready and willing at any moment you desired. He was always so desperate for you, so needy and greedy for your body. But his kisses, no matter how passionate and crazed, were always so loving. He adored you in every way.

These secret rendezvous went on for months, all summer, it was routine, you couldn’t stay away from him. But, maybe you should have. With more classes fast approaching, you began to think about your future. If only you had the money to move out, you and Jasper could finally have a sense of normalcy. You could move in together, start a life together. But the pandemic and school sucked your savings dry and without the conditioned help from your parents, you were penniless. You finally stood on your shaky legs and lifted yourself out of the show. You dried yourself off, shuffled over to your room, dressing yourself, and waiting till the coast was clear. When all was quiet, you texted Jasper and soon he was at your window. Lucky for you, he wasn’t a far drive away. He gently tapped on the glass and leaned down to flash a big goofy grin from behind your curtains. You opened the window and let him in, shushing him as he fell into the room.

“Hey sweetness.” He whispered, loudly. He planted a soft kiss on your cheek as he held you by your hips.“Please be quiet, you’re making me nervous.” You hushed. His smile disappeared slowly as he examined your face. Your red eyes and puffy cheeks gave away your emotions. He was never good at reading a room, but there was little you could hide from him. He made you transparent.

“Have you been crying?” Worry washed over him as he placed his hands to hold your head and slide his thumbs over the soft skin on your cheeks. You tried to avoid his gaze but failed miserably.“Yeah…” You admitted, wiggling out of his grasp so you could sit on the edge of your bed. Your heart started to race, the anxiety and fear wrenching its was through your body. Even the thoughts made you want to cry again.

“Whats wrong? Did something happen with your parents?” You’d been having fights with them for some time now, and he knew it was taking a tole on you. Jasper offered to being you home to his folks, but his relationship with them was on the rocks as it was. Your small group of close friends were your only support. All things considered, the two of you were left on your own. “No…” You muttered, unable to bring yourself to say it out loud. The tears quickly came back up and started falling again. Your emotions, your fears, your pain took over you. You couldn’t get out a single word before your body jerked uncontrollably as you sobbed. It left a slew of incomplete words spewing from your mouth. “I-I….I-I I’m ….. Mmmm …. I’m …..” gasp, sob “Mmmmmha….” and the sobbing continued.

“Hey…Hey…It’s okay.” He cooed softly to you as he rubbed soft, slow circles on your back. It helped, but not much.“N-No…” you shook as you cried, “I’m-m-m-”

“It’s alright, take deep breaths, you don’t have to say anything until you’re ready.” He whispered to you. You clung to him desperately. It took time, but soon you felt good enough to speak again.“Jasper…”

“What sweetness?” He flashed you his kind and loving smile.“I’m pregnant.” You uttered softly. You watched the color drain from his face. His sweet smile faded away to a scowl and the fear rushed back to you. The sobbing started again as you chanted apology after apology, begging for him to stay with you. He didn’t move, he only held you where you were. Finally spoke.

“Don’t be sorry. It’s okay. This isn’t your fault. We tried, we were safe, it’s not your fault. Shhhhh. It’s okay.” Suddenly a bright light interrupted him. Your bedroom door swing open to reveal the large, looming figure of your mother. “What the hell is going on here!” She screamed. You watched in horror as your mother wrenched Jasper from your arms and threw him out into the living room. You followed her, pleading and begging her to stop as she hurled whatever was in reach at him. Shoes, pillows, plates, before your father reached around his collar to throw him out of the house. 

The yelling and screaming continued through the night until the sun came up. Your father nailed your bedroom window shut. Your mother locked your door by pushing furniture in front of it to keep you inside. Your phone, your computer, every form of communication was taken from you. Every mistreatment and punishment being underlined by some iteration of, “this is for your own good” or “this is because we love you.” 

You felt stuck in an emotional limbo for days on end as they kept you prisoner. You didn’t have the energy to cry or argue, there was nothing you could do or say. You had sit and stay, like a good girl. 

One night you were woken by a soft tapping at your bedroom window. You jolted out of bed to see a pair of familiar eyes pear back. Monty stood on the other outside, a face mask and baseball cap hiding his features. He held up a notebook with writing on it and pressed it against the glass. 

“Are you okay?” It read. You rushed to find paper and write back. 

“I’m fine. Wheres Jasper?” 

“Your Dad threatened to shoot him if he saw him again. So he sent me.” He wrote back. 

“Is he okay?” 

“He’s fine. We’re busting you out of here.” 

“How? They’re getting security cameras installed tomorrow.” Monty looked visibly concerned and thought for a moment before responding. 

“Then we’ll have to do it tonight. Pack what you can. We’ll be back to get you in an hour.” 

“How are you going to get me out? The window is nailed shut, I can’t get out.” 

“Don’t worry. Just be prepare to run.” And with that, he left. You packed what you could. A few items of clothing, necessities, and water. You thought about leaving a note. Maybe telling your parents about your pregnancy, they had missed that part of your conversation, thank god. You decided against it, you still didn’t know what to do. Regardless, it was safe to say you could kiss your funding for school goodbye. You’d be on your own from now on. Well, not entirely. 

You heard shuffling outside your bedroom window and looked outside to see two dark figures racing past. You watched as Bellamy peered in, face also obscured by a mask, and waved at you. Jasper’s mask covered face popped into view and planted his palm on the window before holding up a notebook. 

“Get away from the window, and be prepared to run.” It read. As soon as you nodded in agreement, Jasper disappeared from view. You watched Bellamy swing his arms back with a crow bar in hand. The window shattered with a loud crash, glass flying all over your bedroom. He reached a hand out to you, his grasp firm as you clung to his forearm. You were pulled through to the outside and fell to the ground below. 

“Go, go, go, run!” Bellamy whispered, loudly. You looked up at your parent’s house as the sound of dogs barking rang in your ears. Lights flew on from the house as well as neighbor’s lights. You felt so stiff and ridged. The urge to run suppressed by your fear. Jasper reached down and took your hand in his. You looked up at him, his eyes wide with urgency. He tugged at your arm, begging you to get up and run with him. 

Suddenly, you felt free. You felt the strength to get up and push forward. Running with him to a car parked outside the house. The three of you bolted, tripping over yourselves as you raced against the clock. As soon as you were in the car, Octavia greeted you with a big toothy grin. 

“Drive! Drive!Drive!” Jasper shouted at her. Her smile disappeared as she looked back at Jasper with you before her attention went back to the car. The engined roared as she adjusted the gears and soon you were off. Still panting, you looked back at your childhood home and saw your parents tumble out of the front door to try and chase after the car. Your dad tried to chase after the car, but stopped when he realized it was no use. Their figures soon disappeared. 

Octavia cheered triumphantly as you turned back to catch your breath. A great big smile stretched across your face. You’d never felt so free before. You looked over to see Jasper still panting but sporting a bright smile as he looked at you. He reached a hand around the back of your head and pulled you in for a passionate kiss. You laughed and basked in the blissful feeling the adrenaline gave you. 

Soon the moment passed and you were left holding one another’s hand as Octavia drove you to Bellamy’s apartment. You stayed the night, planned your escape. Apparently Jasper’s parents didn’t know he was leaving either, meaning the two of you were officially on the run. You had to leave town, like, now. 

You pooled what money the two of you had, quick to take cash out of your account before your parents could freeze your debit card. Enough to get you out of town and settled in a hotel for a few nights, maybe even a few meals. But you couldn’t afford much without work after that. Lucky for the two of you, a friend from the dorms lived just a town over. You could stay with her a few days while you looked for work. 

“What are you going to do?” Bellamy asked with a dark expression as he stared at you. 

“What?” You were confused, hadn’t you just laid out your plan? 

“Jasper told me you were...you have another problem.” His eyes flashed between the two of you before resting on you again, he was careful to not say anything too pointed. 

“Oh...I...I don’t know.” You said under a whisper. Jasper rested a firm hand on your knee. 

“How long have you known?” Octavia asked. 

“Like a few days. Theres still time to think about it, I just...I just wanna get out right now.” Bellamy nodded his head. 

“If you guys need anything, don’t be afraid to call okay?” He handed you a prepaid phone. You thanked them for your help, packed up, and left the next night. You hid under masks and baseball hats as you sat at the bus station. The cool night air brushed against you skin as you admired the bright lights of the street lamps above. Jasper squeezed your hand in his to get your attention. You looked at one another and smiled under your mask. 

You’d never tell him this, but during the coarse of your relationship you had always worried about Jasper. Worried that maybe you weren’t as serious as you felt. Maybe you were just a little fun to him, the rush of a forbidden romance being what drove him to you. But now, with him so willing run. So willing to leave his comfortable life just for you. Regardless of the responsibilities that came with it. He chose you, without a second thought, he chose you. 

The dark street road was empty and serene. You watched as bats flew down to catch bugs that swarmed the lights above you. Despite your situation, you felt safe and warm there beside him. For the first time, you felt confident that everything is going to be okay. 

#jasper jordan #jasper jordan imagine #jasper jordan smut #jasper x reader #jasper jordan x reader #The 100 #the 100 au #The 100 college au #the 100 imagine #jasper jordan x pregnant reader #jasper

[deviljho]

hs on main but

i’ve been thinking a lot about post retcon vriska and the simply epic vriska vs (vriska) confrontation...

i think that before i actually reread the comic last year, my takeaway of it from hussie’s commentary in the books and just general fan analysis online was that it’s vriska showing her whole ass re: her deep seated self loathing & inability to self actualize and move past her trauma. which is actually a defining aspect of her personality (bc as much as she likes to pretend this isn’t the case it dictates so much of what she does) lmao. in the face of a version of herself, in this case, (vriska), who has done some of the work to unpack her issues and is “happy”, vriska goes sicko mode and vents that frustration on her dead alternate self. but i think it goes even deeper than that and i can’t stop thinking about it so allow me to go off for a bit: 

first off i think it’s crazy to claim (vriska) is happy or working past her childhood issues...she’s become more aware of them, sure, which lets be real is HUGE for any vriska lol but her existence as a ghost forces her to experience an inertia which prevents her from actually taking that awareness and doing anything with it. this is especially highlighted in her relationship with meenah, who is too much of a self absorbed enabler to really help her. having given up on their heroic cause, they start dating because, it’s something to do. but it becomes completely stagnant, just like (vriska) herself, because there’s literally nothing there for (vriska) to bounce off of. vriska needs more than just someone to let her talk, and feel heard to grow and change as a person imo, but i do think being given the specific environment to do so obviously has changed her, just not necessarily for “the better”. 

contrast this with retcon vriska, who is for all intents and purposes now the “real” vriska (and indeed, vriska herself clings to this idea). brought back from her death by terezi for a variety of reasons, mainly that terezi personally regrets killing her and is in love with her LOL but setting aside my vrisrezi agenda for a moment, terezi’s successful use of her seer of mind powers confirms in-story that bringing her back has strategic merit, and from a meta standpoint, narratively i felt like it really worked to reveal that vriska’s presence was needed to keep the meteor crew from falling apart, not to mention her psychic powers playing an important role in protecting the whole team from jade being possessed. i know some people dislike the retcon, but i love it for this simply epic twist tbh. 

anyways...this retcon vriska is someone who canonically obsessed over their plan to defeat lord english for three years and had planned it all out to the last detail, she’s clearly taken the reigns on directing the team overall, and talks multiple times about “not having time for relationships” with the exception of being moirails with terezi which lets be real, is a hard friendzoning of their messy, quadrants-transcending relationship but again i digress... 

vriska was brought back with a purpose, To Be The Hero That The Story Needs, and she’s more fixated than ever with completing this task, probably because in the epic story that she larps being a part of in her mind, successfully completing this mission is to empirically prove that she was worth bringing back, despite all the harm she’s done (and pretends not to feel badly about). vriska also desperately wants her suffering to MEAN something. we see this in her pesterlogs with john before she’s about to fight jack noir; she passes off having her lusus as a task “only really strong” children are given. i think this is why seeing (vriska) enrages her; she’s being confronted with the version of herself who she perceived as making the selfish choice to fight jack, who “deserved” to die for doing so, and on top of all that this (vriska) is now just sitting around in paradox spacing doing nothing and proving nothing to anyone?? i think it honestly has a lot less to do with (vriska) and a lot more to do with vriska obsessively reassuring herself that she’s doing the right thing, that she HAS to go through with sacrificing herself in a big epic moment for the good of everyone else because anything short of that means she’s failed at redeeming herself. vriska cannot accept that there is a version of herself who is okay with just “existing”, without deriving meaning and purpose from the abuse she suffered as a child and inflicted on her friends and countless innocent bystanders. 

 it’s markedly different from, for example, jade’s confrontation with her dead dream self which really is her being forced to look back on a younger version of herself who is (obviously) less experienced and or/traumatized. and i think it’s different from dave & davesprite’s interactions too, the small amount of them we get to see beyond like, ironic jokes. but imo this is bc jade and dave are markedly different from vriska. dave openly rejects the notion of glory and heroism, and avoids it whenever possible. jade is continuously forced to suffer for the sake of the timeline and the narrative, but is shown passively accepting this as simply things that “needed to happen”. personally imo in jade’s case i wanna chalk that up to bad writing on hussie’s part; it kind of sucks that jade never gets to unpack that in homestuck proper.

anyways. tbh the existence of both of those dead alternate selves imo further proves my theory that (vriska) is far from happy; the experience of being a dead alternate self is obviously extremely unsettling and depersonalizing. vriska is terrified of dying; her entire childhood was defined by this terror in a lot of ways and by the end of the session she’s died multiple times, pretty gruesomely. i think her hysterical woman(tm) rant is way more about psyching herself up and her own fears of failure than it is about seeing a supposedly “happy” version of herself. i don’t even think vriska can conceive of such a thing for herself; she has no sense of normalcy or purpose after the session to return to the way john, or like, kanaya has. 

also interesting to note here is meenah as a foil for both of them; immediately after this fight meenah ditches (vriska) to join up with vriska after admitting (with some regret) that she’s a bad person. meenah doesn’t struggle at all with the self image issues vriska has, and though she may feel some guilt over ditching (vriska) just like she expressed guilt to john about becoming the condescence in a different timeline because it meant that she would probably end up killing all her friends back when (vriska) was first trying to rally up a ghost army, she ultimately acts in her self interest and doesn’t really lose sleep over it. in fact she will readily admit that she’s being an asshole and still do whatever she wants. contrast this with all of vriska’s grandstanding about not caring that she comes off as annoying and overbearing, and her overcompensation for that in the form of confidently insisting that the others “need” her.

my final comment is that,...coming back to the vrisrezi of it all, it’s obvious from terezi’s final pesterlogs to vriska before [s] terezi: remem8er that there was a ton of stuff left unsaid between them and presumably between vriska and the rest of the meteor crew as well because vriska spent 90% of the time bossing them around, either about their plans for the new session or just in general in what i like to think of as her loving nagging scorpio way lol. terezi clearly feels like she’s alone in “needing” vriska because even their relationship post retcon is strained, and vriska is so wrapped up in making plans and making sure she gets it right this time, and is already planning to die again out in paradox space. and then after all of this, her fate after her big epic moment is left offscreen for us to wonder about. which in and of itself is pretty narratively tragic for a character like vriska. it makes me honestly wonder how much of this they’re going to unpack in hs2 because tbh it’s pretty juicy. i would love to see a huge confrontation between terezi and vriska about vriska’s choices post retcon...and just in general what life post-session would look like for a person like her. through the epilogues and hs^2 we’ve seen what “normal” life has been like for terezi, and she obviously can’t let go of the past (or vriska. AUGH)...so who’s to say what’s in store for them? i wish we lived in a world where we would eventually find out, and we could see them continue to be each other’s foils in unpacking that but i don’t know if i have faith that the writers will explore it in a satisfying way lmao.

anyways that’s all i have, thanks for reading this if you did read it. i love vriska

#vriska meta #thats all this is really....i have more hs thoughts since i finished rereading it in november but tbh this is the condensed core of them #the vriska of it all... #homestuck meta