Tumgik
#jinyoung sad
dreamquartz · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
happy wet beast wednesday
18 notes · View notes
mystery-box-gifs · 2 years
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media
68 notes · View notes
yemme · 2 years
Video
youtube
WHAT A KISS.  WE GET TO MEET BABI’S CELLS....
Tumblr media
16 notes · View notes
army-in-the-stars · 1 year
Text
3 notes · View notes
minhyukie · 1 year
Text
we’re only a few weeks into 2023 but i am Enjoying the boy group releases this year!!
4 notes · View notes
cristallsnoww · 2 years
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
fated direction 🎥🌠
oil pastel triptych of jinyoung from movie star m/v
this was very experimental and i'm glad i finished this
4 notes · View notes
letsgogatsebenguys · 2 years
Text
Our got7 boys are packed with activities, concerts, fanmeetings
WHEN WILL I SEE ONE OF THEM LIVE 😭 ?!!
4 notes · View notes
sanstropfremir · 2 years
Note
since u've mentioned got7 before for being just some guys and their recent non-jype comback had massive "just some guys having fun" vibes i was curious if you had any more opinions on them in general or this comeback (and maybe how it differed/didnt differ from "standard" group comebacks) in specific! also because they just released a dance practice video i was curious if there were any notable diffrences to previous choreos? i just love ur insights bc i dont know much abt stuff like this! -🐥
the chick emoji a;lskdfjj;lads anon that's so cute
now there are some pretty obvious differences in choreo, particularly in the complexity of the choreo, since got7 in their younger years was obvs pretty famous for difficult choreo + acrobatics as 2pm's younger brothers. one really noticable thing is that the nanana choreo is a lot more separated than their choreos usually are. i think i've mentioned it before when talking about group choreographies but in order to really take advantage of the group in a choreo, you have to have them all in the rehearsal room. with a normal kpop group that's not a problem because they're usually all under the same company and have the same schedules and managers, so they have block rehearsals with all the members there all the time. you can see this in all of their previous choreographies: they have pretty intricate formations and physical shapes that involve member interaction. things like the intro of ycmn, the handkerchief throw/catch in poison, the fall back trick and that crazy close backwards travel in the chorus in if you do, like all of eclipse, all of last piece, etc etc etc, these are all choreos that need all the members physically present in order to get all the shapes right. nanana on the other hand, has very little member interaction (just the jinyoung and yugyeom bit in the beginning) and although there are some pretty fun transitions and shapes, they're all made with the members standing independantly of each other. this basically expedites the process because they can all learn and practice the choreo fairly easily on their own, and then put everything together when they're all in the same room.
lack of rehearsal time isn't the only reason the nanana choreo is less complex though. you can hear jackson and jinyoung talk about it very briefly in their dance practice behind the scenes, where they say that this choreo is more about the 'feel' of the song than anything else, which is very different from their previous choreographies. jype has a reputation for having very good dancers and got7 was at the head of this, with a whole catalogue of very difficult and intricate choreos that are about showing off the technical skills of the performers first and foremost. the only other choreo from their catalogue that is equally vibey as nanana is probably thursday, which is a bside, not a title track.
as far as the actual cb goes i mean, they barely did any promo, i think they only went on youngjae's radio show and did the fanmeeting (that was basically just a concert), so that's pretty different from the typical bg cb.
3 notes · View notes
n-agiz · 1 year
Note
can you please drop the bae jinyoung image in your banner.. i've been trying to find it everywhere but i can't.. 😭
here you go nonnie ! also adding in the one from my icon because i love it very much <33
Tumblr media Tumblr media
0 notes
cuffs-crew · 2 years
Text
Bouta make Chay an Arsonist because I can! 
0 notes
emojellyace08 · 10 months
Text
Lookism Characters when it's your birthday!!!
A/N: It's my birthday todayyyy!!! So if you share the same birthdate with me or you happen to scroll this down on your own special day and if you're not on the mood, this is for you!
Tumblr media
Daniel Park/Zack Lee/Eli Jang/Sally Park/Mira Kim/Crystal Choi/Mary Kim/Zoe Park/Jace Park/Jay Hong/Heather/Jake Kim/Yoojin/Jihan Kwak/Gapryong Kim/Jinyeong Park/Sinu Han/Lua Im/Brad Lee/Jerry Kwon/Yui Kim/Joy Hong/Duke Pyeon/Jason Yoon
The really super sweethearts tbh
They're the ones who will remembers everyone's birthday (especially when you're superrr close with them).
So they will call the others to have a group meeting or create a group chat with over 40 members on it to surprise you on your special day! "GUYS ATTENTION!!! IT'S Y/N'S BIRTHDAY IN 4 DAYS WE GOTTA SURPRISE THEM!!!"
They will assign who will buy the décor and food (they will all share the budget!).
Will think of many plans and ideas to surprise you (It can turn out a little wacky though but at least they have put effort on it!)
Vasco/Doo Lee/Jiho Park/Olly Wang/Goo Kim/Yuseong/Warren Chae/Jibeom Kwak/Tom Lee/Kuroda Ryuhei/Sinu Han/Gongseob Ji/Alexander Wang (add in Zack Lee ; a little bit if you're really close)
They're the super noisy ones lmao
I can imagine the others getting so annoyed from them since they can't keep quiet when they're still preparing for the surprise (don't blame them they're super excited!).
So when you came inside the dark room and you opened the lights, they will scream and screech at the top of their lungs "HAPPY BIRTHDAY Y/NNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!" xD.
They're also the super hyped ones while singing Happy Birthday even though they're out of tune LMAO (the others looks so done while you just stand there in the center with the cake lit with the candles be like 🧍‍♀️).
Even while eating, they're still super talkative while there's lot of food smudges on their face (how the hell can they still speak? Because their vocal chords are SUPERIOR).
Jay Hong/Joy Hong/Jiho Park/Crystal Choi/Goo Kim/Gun Park/DG/Yoojin/Tom Lee/Mitsuki Soma/Charles Choi
The super rich ones. They have the budget to buy the décor for themselves but the others insisted to pay for it and help too.
Will also buy you a very expensive gift like designer clothes, jewelry, shoes or anything that you really like but you can't afford! The others will be just like "Woah! They bought the limited edition jewelry of f/b for Y/N!"
They just really love you so much so they bought the most expensive gift for you that they can find so you'll feel very special! (Though just don't use them as a sugar mommy/daddy it can turn them off).
They will smile, chuckle and pat you on the head if you're super happy with their present "WuahHhhHHh THANK YOU SO MUCHHHHH YOU DON"T HAVE TO SPEND TOO MUCH MONEY ON ME NEXT TIME!!!" "As long you're happy I am too".
They just wants to see you smiling all the time even if it's not your b-day they hate you seeing sad (like everyone hates seeing you sad :)))) .
Daniel Park/Zack Lee/Eli Jang/Warren Chae/Sally Park/Mira Kim/Vasco/Jace Park/Mary Kim/Zoe Park/Heather/Jake Kim/Jihan and Jibeom Kwak/Hudson Ahn/Johan Seong/Yuseong/Jerry Kwon/ Line Man/ Lua Im/ Sinu Han/Brad Lee/Duke Pyeon/Jason Yoon/Jichang Kwak/Young Jinyoung Park
Will feel insecure about their gift (or if they don't have something to give for you).
Like don't blame them they're just in high school they're not like super rich (for young Jinyoung Park too).
They will be the ones who will either buy you cheap but cute items that you like and it's wrapped in beautiful gift wraps, make it hand-made or they will write a super long letter with your favorite decorations and stickers on the envelope (they're so precious).
They will be hesitant first to give you their present but after encouraging themselves, they will be super shy and lovey dovey while giving it to you "Ha-Happy Birthday Y/N... Hope you like it".
But after reading their letter you'll probably burst into tears lol (they're so good at expressing their feelings through writing it down on a paper that it makes you feel appreciated and loved so much since you're so nice to them).
They will also comfort you for crying and they will feel bad for making you cry because of the letter lmao "Y/N ARE YOU OKAY WHY ARE YOU CRYING?"
Over all sweethearts tbh "WUAHHHH THANK YOU FOR THE GIFT YOU DON'T HAVE TO SPEND ON ME TOO MUCH MONEY ON ME DUMMY THE SURPRISE IS ENOUGH!!!" "So-sorry for making you cry though..."
Johan Seong/Samuel Seo/Gun Park/Goo Kim/DG/Taesoo Ma/Vin Jin/Magami Kenta/Jiho Park (villain arc)/Cheon Taejin/Mandeok/Yui Kim/Mitsuki Soma/Xiaoleoung
"Why the hell am I here?" vibe.
They're just here for the food (they might not even know or care for the celebrant if you're not close with them lmao).
But they're still going to buy a gift for you if you know each other.
Acts like they hate it, but they secretly love birthday parties (Goo's an obvious party monkey so he really loves making chaos on birthdays like throwing and smudging the cake on everybody's faces lol).
Will secretly turn on birthday song remixes and sus shit on the bluetooth speaker lmao.
ADD IN!: Duke Pyeon/Daniel Park/Jay Hong/Jerry Kwon/Warren Chae/Vasco/Jiho Park/Brad Lee/Lua Im/Goo Kim/Line Man
They're the camera man with the shaky hands.
The pictures they take will be a little bit blurry and shaky while Goo is just doing it on purpose to piss you off (the others are really doing their best don't get angry).
They just wants to enjoy and spend some time with you without the others bossing them around (please save them).
Jiho Park/Vasco/Joy Hong/Warren Chae/Zoe Park/Goo Kim/Kuroda Ryuhei
They're the ones that will unintentionally spoil the surprise.
They will get so excited that they will spill the tea from you without realizing that they're talking to the celebrant and the others will cover their mouth shutting them up. "WE'RE HAVING A SURPRISE PARTY FOR Y/-" "OKAY WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT???!!! Sorry Y/N..."
They will apologize to the others while there are tears building in their eyes "Sorry guys! I just got so excited I won't do it again!" (while Goo is just doing it on purpose to tick the others off he's such an asshole lmao).
226 notes · View notes
wannaeatramyeon · 1 year
Text
Masterlist of Other Lookism ✨Bullshit✨
Lookism Masterlist | Part 2 ☞ (multi-character headcanons/dynamics)
Lookism Storylines ☞ (fun shit. mix of x reader and with reader)
Gun + Goo | Jake + Samuel | Vin + Ryuhei |
You're here! Everyone else ☞ (single character-centric standalones)
... Even More Lookism Masterlist ☞ (different characters in same scenarios series)
How To Fight/Viral Hit Masterlist | Seong Taehoon
(I hit the link limit on the main one)
Maintained collection of my Lookism silly writing, headcanons and ramblings
Single Character-Centric Standalones
Vasco: the Strongest Cinnamon Roll (Vasco x Reader if you squint)
Vasco: Gen + Romantic hc
Vasco x Reader: Compliment Assault | With help from Jace's ears
Vasco Appreciation Post
Vasco x Reader: Haircut
Vasco x Reader: Glowups for the fights (feat Jace)
Vasco x Reader: First time
Vasco x Reader: make the bad guys good for a weekend lifetime (feat Jace + Burn Knuckles)
Vasco x Reader: Fairground date
Vasco x Reader: Embrace
Jace Park Appreciation Post
Sad Sinu (meme)
Johan Seong x Reader: Puppy pick up
Johan Seong (x Lua Im): Making new friends
Johan Seong x Reader: Cute
Johan Seong x Reader: Kiss Me
Johan Seong x Reader: Silences & confessions
Johan Seong x Reader: Vision
Johan Seong x Reader: His love language
Johan Seong x Reader: Home
Johan Seong x Reader: Reunion
Zack Lee and Johan Seong: Three words
Zack x Johan x Reader: Home
Johan + Mira + Zack reunion
UI Daniel Knocking you out
Daniel Park with Reader: Two bodies
DG x Reader: Daniel Park
DG x Reader: Cinema
DG x Reader: Baby
DG x Reader: First words
DG x Reader: Jealous hc
Yandere!DG + Reader: His hold on you
DG x M!Reader: Meeting Aru
DG x Reader: Remember?
DG x Reader: Love you too!
DG/James Lee x Reader: One arm
James Lee/DG x Reader: Haircut
DG x Reader: Touchstarved
James Lee x Reader: Trophy Partner
DG x Reader: Public Announcement
Lineman x Reader: After he meets Jake Kim
Lineman & Jake Kim discovering Big Deal's bounties
Eli Jang x Reader: The morning light
Eli Jang x Reader: you're losing me
Eli Jang x Reader: Returning home
Eli Jang X Reader: Daddy
Eli Jang x Reader: loving touches
Eli Jang x Reader: Stargazing
Logan Lee x Reader: Snapshots
Xiaolong x Reader: Asking
Xiaolong x Reader: Webtoons
Warren Chae x Reader: Househusband and The Fighter
Kwak Jichang x Reader: Frozen
Kwak Jibeom x Reader: Snakes in a bath
Cheon Taejin x Kwak Jihan: Shouldn't
Yandere!Baek Hangyeol x Reader: True Beauty
Sophia x Male!Reader
Hudson Ahn x Reader: growing older
Eugene x Reader: No smut
Gen 0 x Reader: Jinyoung, Gapryong
Jinyoung Park x Reader: Jake (feat Jake)
Seongji Yuk x Reader: Treats
Seongji Yuk x Reader: Favourite
Seongji Yuk x Reader: Tanghulu
260 notes · View notes
thedoctorsthings · 8 months
Text
bts jealousy scenarios
Tumblr media
someone asked for this but I'm an idiot who doesn't know how asks work so I lost it.
anyways the ask was just 'jealousy' and that lack of instruction made my autistic ass scared. Here it finally is.
warnings: one (1) sad ending, angst, drunk person, history student writer finding it necessary to put one historical au in there. (why do i try to be funny in these intro/warning thingies? nobody reads this. I am a jester putting on a clown's show for the deaf and blind)
WC: Don't know, don't care
KIM SEOKJIN
She's dancing. Not only is she dancing, she's dancing with her husband...and it's not him. He watches her swaying along the dance floor with the better man. Seokjin knew he was the better man. If he wasn't you wouldn't have married him. Your new husband Jinyoung lifts you up and twirls you around and you laugh, a sound clear as water. You smiled brighter when you were with Jinyoung, laughed harder, moved with more energy. Seokjin knew he had lost. Still he couldn't bring himself to be angry. You were happy. That was all that mattered. When he lost you years ago he'd signed up for a life on the sidelines and now he had to bear the consequences.
The song ended and you let your husband go. Seokjin walked over to you right after gathering all his courage and swallowing the frog in his throat. "dance with me!" you said before he could. He couldn't find any words so just took your hand and walked you back to the dancefloor. once you've found your rhythm and are softly rocking back and forth on the shiny floor of the gorgeous venue, he finally finds his voice. "Are you happy?", He asks. "of course", you beam. "Just wanted to make sure", he says almost whispering. your smile drops: "are you okay?" you ask concerned. "When you're with me always". "You need to let me go Jin". He sighs, tears welling up in his eyes: "I'm sorry". It's the last thing he says before walking away out of the venue into the night. He'll take enough with this. As long as you're in his life he would never truly be unhappy. He'd be the dry dust of the savannah spending his time waiting to be blessed by your rain. He'd be the moon yearning for the moments he could take some of your sunlight every once in a while. If this was all the both of you could be then that's how it would be.
MIN YOONGI
You were dancing with Mr. Fleatwood again. Yoongi knew he'd been courting you for more than 10 months now. It was killing him. Why couldn't he just work up the courage to ask you. To go to your house as a caller instead of just waiting for you to look in his direction. His family was much wealthier than yours so there was no need for him to be embarrassed, and yet he was. Something about your divine beauty, your quick wit and sharp intelligence made him a nervous wreck.
"why don't you ask her to dance? What's the worst thing that could happen?" Namjoon, his best friend had come to stand next to him, his wife on his arm. "She could look at me". "oh you melodramatic piece of work!" Namjoon's wife exclaimed. Yoongi sighed melodramatically: "I'm too late, she's been courted by Mr. Fleatwood for over 10 months. A proposal can't be far away". "exactly!" Namjoon said with a smile Yoongi found way to optimistic looking. "they've been courting for over a year and no proposal yet. They're taking too long. If you ask me, she's trying to shake him off". "I've learned not to ask you things", yoongi chuckled, but while his friend walked of he considered what he had said. Maybe he did have a chance. "worst case scenario she dumps her glass over your head. It's a hot summer night, it'll be refreshing. Just go for it before I do it for you", Namjoon's equally optimistic wife whispered near his ear. All right then, here goes nothing. Yoongi walks over to you. "Miss, might I have this dance?" "If you take me away from that bore of a Mr. Fleatwood you can have anything", you smiled.
KIM NAMJOON
Namjoon's watching you on set. He came here to surprise you at work. This way he could drive you home to the dinner he made for you. When you told him you would be acting in a romantic comedy he thought he would be able to handle it. Turns out he couldn't. Your co-star just threw you on the bed and was crawling over you. When he kissed you Namjoon decided it was time to take a bathroom break.
When he comes over the scene is done and you're getting ready to leave. "Hey honey!", you beam at him. "Yeah, hey honey", he huffs. "What's up with you?" you ask frowning. "Nothing, I'd just like to get home", he answer dramatically looking away from you. You chuckle and figure you have an idea about what's going on here. "okay, okay, I'm almost ready". When you're out of costume you leave with Namjoon to the parking lot. He doesn't say anything the whole way. When he starts driving and you look over to him to see him angrily sticking his tongue in his cheek you can't take it anymore. You try to hold in your laugh while you ask him: "Are you upset about the scene?" "Don't laugh at me", he says curtly. "Oh come on Namjoon don't be ridiculous, it was only a scene for a movie". Namjoon dramatically looks out the window. "Would it help you if I told you that my co-star is an absolute dick that I can't stand?" "Would that be true or just something to shush my hurt feelings?", Namjoon says with a small smile on his face. "It would very much be true". "Do you need me to beat him up for you?" You laugh: "I shouldn't have to ask you things like that, you should just do it". "I prepared a date for us", Namjoon says after laughing: "I'm sorry I overreacted". "It's okay, I get it".
JUNG HOSEOK
You're sitting in front of him at the restaurant you agreed on. Next to you is your boyfriend and next to him is his girlfriend. God how he hates this. Why did he agree to go on this double date? Why was he dating Jinae? He didn't love her. Why were you dating this douchebag? He didn't love you and Hoseok didn't even want to think about the possibility that you truly loved him. Lastly, why oh why was he not the one next to you? You should be dating him. Hoseok was sure he could give you everything you wanted, make you so much happier than he could. He saw the way your boyfriend looked at other women. How he made little comments that made your smile drop. Hoseok had spent this entire date moping and barely talking. "So how long have you been dating again?", your boyfriend asks. "eeuhm...", Hoseok hesitates just long enough to make it awkward before Jinae saves him: "almost a month". An awkward silence falls before you ask your boyfriend to go dance with you. Oh God that's right, this godforsaken restaurant has a dancefloor and romantic music playing. Your boyfriend manages to catch himself right in time but Hoseok saw he was about to roll his eyes. He would never do that. If you asked him to to dance with you he would be the happiest man on earth.
You're on the dancefloor slow dancing with your boyfriend and Hoseok stares holes into the back of your head while ignoring his girlfriend next to him. He knows he's being horrible to her. That she doesn't deserve this, but he couldn't stand to be alone while you were with someone. "they're so cute. Do you think we could ever be like that?", Jinae asks with an endeared look in her eyes. "no". "What is up with you? Why did you bring me here, you've been ignoring me all night", Jinae sounds clearly offended. "I don't know, I think we should break up".
PARK JIMIN
You're laying on your couch watching some romantic movie. An empty container of ice cream is laying on the floor in front of you and the tear streaks are still clear on your face. You and your boyfriend just broke up. Apparently He couldn't handle your close friendship with Jimin. It had started with him making sly remarks towards him and ended with him accusing you of cheating. Doors had been slammed and tears shed but it was over now, for good. You'd gone straight home and hadn't contacted anyone. you Just wanted to be alone.
All of a sudden your shaken awake by the ringing of your doorbell. After blinking your sleep away you get up to open the door. On the way there you look at the clock and see it's 2am. The bell rings again right before you open the door. Jimin almost falls onto your floor. "What are you doing here?" You ask softly. Jimin leans against the wall and manages to slur out: "You've ruined my life". He smells of alcohol. "Jimin, what are you talking about?" "I can't stop thinking about you and your stupid boyfriend. I haven't been able to stop thinking about you for years and now you have this idiot of a boyfriend. I hate him. he's so pretentious. You should be with me because when you're not it burns and I need you to make it stop. I know you love him. I know I don't have a chance with you. You're so smart and he's also smart and I'm not. You always talk about how amazing he is and I can't fucking take it. Maybe I should get out of your life, it hurts too much". All of this was rambled and a lot of it incomprehensible. after a moment of silence and Jimin trying to stay standing by holding on to the hallway mirror you say: "We broke up". "Come on Jimin, you can sleep on the couch and we'll talk tomorrow". "Okay, I love you", Jimin slurs while following you to the living room.
KIM TAEHYUNG
Your new fiancé has been proudly strutting around all night with you on his arm. You're gorgeous as always. His name was Dokyeom and he was annoyingly perfect. He was everything you deserved and everything Taehyung wasn't. You were the heiress of your mothers company and so you were always meant to marry the son of a rich family. That wasn't him. Taehyung came from an average family. The only reason he was here was because he was your best friend and you invited him to every single one of these events.
Dokyeom puts his arm around your waist, pulls you closer and Taehyung almost recoils. He couldn't take this. He had to get out of here. Since you were teenagers he'd been in love with you. Never once did he say anything. It would ruin your friendship with no point because he's always known you were to marry rich. And the worst part about all of this; you were happy. This would be so much easier if you hated Dokyeom. If you called Taehyung every night to complain about the horrible man your parents had arranged you to marry, but you didn't. You liked your fiancé.
He left. He had to. On his way out he asked one of your mutual friends to tell you he was sorry. He was just about to step out the door onto the street when he heard you call his name. "Taehyung, where are you going so early?" "oh, I'm just tired. Thought I'd head out early". "Without saying goodbye?" He hated this look on your face. Your face had fallen when he said that and now he felt horrible. You frowned and said: "you normally love these things. What's really going on?" He figured there was no point in lying. Maybe Namjoon had been right when he said that the best thing to do would be to be honest with you. So here he went; finally taking his chance after almost 10 years. "I can't do this Y/N. I can't watch you marry that guy. I love you. I love you so much and yet I can't stand to watch you be happy with someone else. I can't keep hurting myself.
"Run away with me", was all you answered.
JEON JUNGKOOK
He was going to kill that guy, and after that you. No, he would never do that; he loved you. He was just mad. Earlier tonight you had fought. You wanted to go out with your friends but when Jungkook saw the dress you were wearing he told you to change. It turned into a fight. You said he had no right to tell you what to wear and he had accused you of not respecting him. In hindsight he'd realised you were right. So now he was here at the club he knew you were at, to apologise. He didn't want to wait until you were back because then he'd be asleep and he knew that you wouldn't talk about it the next morning.
When he arrived he'd spotted you after a mere 2 seconds of looking at the dancefloor. You were dancing closely with some guy. He had his hands all over you but you seemed to drunk to realise. A couple seconds later you seemed to sober up a bit and told the guy to back of. He didn't of course. This was Jungkook's cue to step in. He marched up to the guy and pulled him away from you. "When a lady says back off, you back of alright you piece of filth". He wrapped his arm around your shoulders, "let's go home Y/N". "Okay, but I'm still mad at you". "Yeah about that", he lead you out of the club while saying: "I'm sorry about that, you were right I totally overreacted". He opened the car door for you and then went over to the driver's seat. "You should be able to wear what you want, I'll shut up about it next time". "Good". You said curtly. After a few minutes of silence you softly said "I'm sorry I stormed out without solving the argument". He looked over and smiled, "Forgiven and forgotten".
requests always welcome
121 notes · View notes
lookismstuff-2 · 9 months
Text
Lookism: Ep 468 Reaction
SPOILERS ALERT
In this chapter, a new revelation was made regarding an intriguing question within the story, while a new question was asked.
Tumblr media
To Warren, Vasco, and Jerry's shock, the two Daniels battled it out with the intent to kill. The Body (I wouldn't call it Big Daniel since it's currently soulless and since there will be a panel that's granted will change your mind about it if you still see it as a living human being) was monstrously strong.
Tumblr media
Daniel was still the underdog of this intense battle but with his ultimate instinct he landed more hits on the Body than before. Unfortunately the Body could now copy even Taesoo, Jichang, and of course Gun, (obviously learning from how Daniel previously attacked it) at an alarming speed.
Tumblr media
The spectators (Warren & co.) wondered how Daniel was cornered, when he grew that strong already, but the answer was clear: the Body somehow, strangely, was more experienced. The Body even moved like someone the spectators had never seen before, but it was hinted that the person it copied was none other than Jake's notorious brother!
Tumblr media
(BUT THE BODY HAD NEVER MET JAKE'S BROTHER IN THIS TIMELINE. SO WHEN DID IT MEET HIM TO KNOW HOW TO COPY HIS MOVES...??? DUN DUN...)
Daniel finally landed a critical hit on the Body, and they both fainted.
That is, until the Body rose up again in this manner. (EEEEEPPPP THIS CAME STRAIGHT OUT OF THOSE ZOMBIE MOVIES I SWEAR)
Tumblr media
Vasco was almost attacked, so Warren and Jerry decided to bring "their friend" back to his senses, and Vasco joined them too. Even though they were tired as hell from their previous fights and would absolutely lose (GUYS GUYS IT'S A SHELL. DANIEL TELL THEM! OH WAIT YOU'RE OUT COLD).
Tumblr media
Elsewhere, Jake woke up not remembering much about the latter parts of his fight against drugged Samuel, but Alexander summed it up for him while massaging Samuel's feet (BWAHAHAHAH THIS IS SOMETHING THAT HOBIN & co. DID TO PEOPLE WHO FAINTED IN HOW TO FIGHT/VIRAL HIT).
Tumblr media
True to his mission, Jake left to find Jinyoung, whom he used to call "Uncle" and who loved him so much, being so gentle (I'm sad for the two of them). He walked alone and found Jinyoung's lab.
Tumblr media
Bongae already warned him about Jinyoung, but Jake greeted Jinyoung anyway, which incensed the pharmacologist because all that he saw in Jake was Jake's older brother...
...THE MURDERER OF KIM GABRYONG.
Tumblr media
Jinyoung seemed to have witnessed the violent tragedy alone and he had never been all right since, allegedly. And so with Gabryong's techniques that Jake inherited and Jinyoung copied, they prepared to fight...
Tumblr media Tumblr media
That's it for this week. I already sensed that Daniel was going to lose, and that the Body was unstoppable at this point. But seeing little Jake and young Jinyoung so happy and now so broken, broke my heart.
65 notes · View notes
kmazine · 8 months
Text
I Can't Have You
Tumblr media
bestfriend!jinyoung x female reader
genre : angst
For some reason, the walk back home feel so long and painful.
"Why it can't it be me?"
"I love you, Jinyoung"
You silently mutter under your breath. The words that you couldn't even say to him. The tears you don't bother to wipe, streaming down your face.
"Jinyoung, you okay?" You ask your best friend over the phone when your best friend called you an hour ago. It was late at night so you wonder why he call.
It was silent for a few seconds until you heard sniffles taking over the background noise that you register was from some television show. You didn't think much more. You immediately jump out from your bed and run towards your door.
"I'm coming" You heard Jinyoung replied with a sad hum and probably a nod, and that makes you fasten you steps. Luckily his apartment is not that far so you already in his apartment within minutes.
"Hey, you okay? How many days you've been drinking like this?" Closing the door behind you and took off your shoes, you can see few empty bottles of soju on the floor next to him. You immediately sit beside him on the floor. Your heart sank at the way his shoulder slouch, arms hugging his knees. He looks up to you when he hears your presence. And you look at him. Eyes swollen and he looks gaunt too. You scoot next to him and wrap your arms around his shoulder, hoping that you'd bring him comfort.
"We- we broke up" His tears starts to roll down his cheeks again as he said that. You let out a pain sigh, slowly wiping his tears with your fingers and pat his head softly.
"It's okay, Jinyoung. You will get through this. You will be fine okay?" You still stroking his hair, like an adult trying to persuade a child to not cry over candies.
"But I really love her, Y/n. It's been a few days and it hurts me that I can't see her face and listen to her voice. I can't do this Y/n. I miss her so much I feel like -- my heart..." He sniffled between words and voice quavering at the last part as he tapping his chest harder each sentences as if that will ever chase the pain away. You take his hands away and give him a tight grip, as to tell him, you're there for him. Your heart clenched to see him like this.
You know falling in love with your best friend was never a good idea. You've been liking him even before you became friend. Stealing glance at him during the class or sometimes exchanging smiles and nods when you saw each others is your definition of happiness back then. Then one semester, you and Jinyoung were assigned together for university projects and both of you clicked right away and the next thing you know, you two are inseparable as best friends. When you thought it's going to be easy for you and your feelings, but it was far from that.
Because from then on, Jinyoung see you as his best friend and best friend only.
Then start the cycle of your crumbling love story. You listen to his sobbing stories after the break ups like a best friend do. He try to match you with his other good friends because as a best friend, he want to see you happy with a good guy. Once, you ended up help him with the girl he likes because he just can't stop begging you.
Even after graduating and working on different companies, the cycle never end. And that's why it's hard. It's harder now to confess and tell him you love him. After everything, after all these years.
Especially this time, the relationship didn't seems like the others. He wasn't just smitten, and she didn't seem like the other girls she dated in the past. As much as you hate to admit it, he's definitely in love. You never thought they'll break up if you're being honest. She's a perfect woman any man can ever wish. It was perfect, as if they're actually made for each others.
You know asking him what happened now wont help him so you decided to make him a meal and tea to calm himself down. It was hard forcing the man to eat but you do every way you can and he finally give in.
"I don't know what will I do without you. Thank you Y/n" He give you a sad smile as he lays down on the couch. Deep sighs never left his mouth. You put the empty bottles in a plastic and put them aside and clean his messy living room.
"Glad I could help. You look too miserable for me not to to do that. I know it's hard but please, do not skip meals." You grabbing the blanket to cover his full body.
"Y/n?" He called for you so you lower yourself so your eyes meet on his level.
"Is it always this hard after the break up? It hurts so much. How can love be this painful huh? "He chuckles - probably knows how pathetic and sad he sound right now. You didn't say anything, just let him rambles more and give him another sympathetic smiles.
You make sure he was sleeping when you decided to leave. You're about to close the door when you heard his phone rings. You can hear Jinyoung shuffles to get up and the last thing you heard his voice saying her name. You closed the door shut, hoping that your heart closed the same for him.
There is a person that you can’t have even when you love them,
Just look at me, I’m next to you but I can’t have you,
I can’t have you.
--------------------------------------
a.n : this one have been sitting in my draft for months now. This is based from Bank's I Can't Have You (korean old song) and the lyrics are just heart breaking so here we go. Again, please do not mind the grammatical mistakes and typos. I will fix it later from time to time. Because the more I re-read, the more I want to delete this so I'll just post first.
46 notes · View notes
kangaracha · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media
After an accident splits apart the group, Felix is left alone in the world, wishing for better days to return (little does he know, that dreams come to those who truly want them).
---
a/n: for @kokinu09, our beloved zom mother and dedicated supporter of all that we do. happy birthday!
---
LEAVE - PART 1
---
Once upon a time, after a terrible accident, a boy came from another world and stayed in this one and lived quite happily for several years longer.
This is not that story.
---
"Hey, Yongbok!" that voice calls behind him, and his breath catches in his throat.
He doesn't want to turn around. In fact, he doesn't; not when he can tuck his chin into his collar and fix his eyes on the pavement and walk as fast as he can away, as if he hadn't heard anything at all. Maybe this time, if he pretends that everything is just the same as it used to be and someone will be waiting for him just around that corner, it will come true.
But that won't happen, of course. How could it, when he deserves everything he gets? When he was the one that ruined it all? No, wishes don't come true for people like him. Instead, he will run without letting on that he's running, and they will catch up to him, and it will all play out just like it does every day-
"Yongbok! Hey, lucky boy! Where are you going?"
Felix's eyes betray him, glancing back towards the mocking calls that only grow louder. The sun catches in them for their trouble, sweet golden light from the low horizon, burning at the rings around them and their bloodshot interior. He can only make out the shape of the boys behind him around its glare, the vague features that differentiate them from one another; he couldn't possibly miss Hyunjin amongst their ranks, slinking along at the back like he knows he shouldn't be here.
That's how they catch him; Hyunjin, trying to hide behind another boy. Trying to pretend that he doesn't know what he's doing, right up until the moment Jinyoung's hand wraps around Felix's arm and stops him several metres short of safety.
"You should have waited," Jinyoung says, conversational even though they both know better than to think they are friends. "We wanted to walk with you."
Felix tugs at his arm, trying to wheedle his way out of his grip, but the other boy won't let go, hand wrapped around his arm in an iron grip. "I like walking alone," he lies. "I always go alone."
"I know," Jinyoung says, and gives him a smile that's full of teeth. "It makes me sad. That's why I wanted to walk with you."
"Oh."
"I feel like I never see you with anyone at all, actually," he continues, as if Felix's jaw hasn't screwed itself to the roof of his mouth, as if his skin doesn't turn clammy in the boy's grip and his hand doesn't curl into a fist, tingling from the constriction in his arm above. "Ever since Minho-"
"Shouldn't we get to class, Jinyoung?" Hyunjin asks from somewhere in the back of the gaggle of boys that surrounds them. "The bell is going to ring soon, and we haven't even made it to the gate."
"You used to know Minho, didn't you, Hyunjin?" Jinyoung says instead of answering, swinging around to look at him. "Weren't you two friends?"
Hyunjin hesitates, his face like a rabbit trapped in a corner as he looks for a way to turn, and then shrugs. "I guess so," he says, like he doesn't really know. Or care. "It was a long time ago."
Felix stares at him, the iron-tight grip of Jinyoung's hand on his arm momentarily forgotten in the way that Hyunjin stands there and tips his chin up and pretends that Minho never meant anything to him at all, his eyes turned carefully away to avoid Felix's gaze. Coward, he thinks, and, liar. His gaze sweeps over the boys, sizing them up.
It's a silly thing to do, when there is seven of them and one of him, and no one waiting around the corner to come and pick him up when he doesn't arrive on time...but the way they spit out Minho's name on the pavement like that, the way Hyunjin stands up ramrod straight and stony-faced in their midst and pretends to be one of them, stirs at the hot anger that coils in the bottom of his stomach, goading it into rearing its black, ugly head. And so what if they beat him to a pulp, if they call him names and spread vicious rumours throughout his class? For Minho, it's worth it. For Minho, it's the least he could do, after all the evil he has already caused.
His eyes slide past them, to the street beyond, the alley that darts between two houses. His shadow is not there, his ghost that normally follows on his heels. It's a shame - some days, he might curse at it, others ignore it, but at these kind of times, he thinks he might find a little comfort in looking at that face again.
He doesn't deserve comfort anyway. He deserves what's coming to him, when he tips his chin up and says, "You can't talk about Minho like that."
The way Jinyoung looks at him is dangerous, eyes glittering with a dark kind of intent, an irritation at being questioned when he has so carefully built this troupe of boys who would never dare to. "Yeah?" he replies, eyebrows raised. "Why not?"
All of the breath catches in Felix's chest. He grabs it tight and tries to still the racing of his wild heart. "Because it's disrespectful. And he was my friend."
"You think he wasn't my friend too?" Jinyoung throws back. His grip tightens, his fingernails pressing half-moons into the constellations of Felix's skin. "It's the day that you did it, you know. If you even remember. Or care."
All of a sudden, everything stills. His rabbit-beat heart, the scrape of his throat, the heat of the blood running through his veins. Even the world around him - the sharp chill of autumn, the fog rolling at the feet, the slide of Hyunjin's eyes away from any place where he might have to witness what happens because of his cowardice. Because of Felix's stupidity, because of Minho's stubborn, mule-headed-
"He was not your friend," Felix bites, and then he launches forward, his fist cutting itself open on the yawn of the boy's teeth.
It feels good, for a moment; the sharp split of bloody knuckles, the crack of his jaw under the force of his arm. The way Jinyoung's grip slides from his arm as he stumbles back into the wall, one hand clutching at his face. Felix feels himself smile, wide and wild, in the wake of that disbelief, feels the sting of pain as he shakes out his fist. 
And then a hand finds his stomach, driving all the air from his lungs, and his back finds the pavement, and all he can see is faces and fists, blocking out the morning sky. None of them want to be left out, savage as a pack of wolves upon fallen prey, and Jinyoung isn't inclined to stop them - not that he could, with his jaw cracked in half, blood dribbling from the corner of his mouth.
Not that Felix can see that. He is curled on the ground, barely a prayer able to slide its way past his lips. The world narrows to this; impact, and the expectation of impact, and the memory of the impact even after it is gone, radiating down through his bones into the scar tissue he's already wound around his heart. He doesn't know when they started, or when it will end. Maybe it won't end at all, like those myths where a single moment of time continues to recur, over and over again. Maybe they won't think to stop until he is-
"Hey!" 
The voice that shouts out isn't Jinyoung, or Hyunjin, or any of the few boys that might think to save him if they happened to pass by. It's too loud and too grating, its edges too sharp. Felix doesn't recognise it, but somehow, he still feels something sad when he hears it; a great sense of longing, or the ache of a time long past or once missed the indulgence of. Whatever it is, fists follow it, grunts of effort and yelps of pain. Boys scatter in every direction, their circle widening. A black shadow stands over Felix, hiding the sun in its shape.
"You wanna go again?" it growls, and as if by magic, every opponent scatters, lost to the whisper of the breeze.
The shadow turns, one pale hand reaching out to help Felix up. Its fingers are slender and long, its forefinger encased in gold; a ring, achingly familiar. Felix stares at it for a moment too long. 
"Are you coming, or do you want to lie there all day?" that voice asks, and the shadow shifts, the sunlight falling in shafts of gold across its face. His face - Minho, his ghost, just as he had been the last time Felix had checked on his heels. Except for the dark bruise that's blooming on his jaw, the split of skin across his cheekbone. The scrape of his knuckles, oozing blood even as he offers that hand. The ghost had never looked like that, not in the five years since he'd first appeared. 
The ghost had never offered him a hand up from the ground either. Mostly, he just stood in the background and judged. Felix is used to it by now.
"Hello-o," Minho says, his voice sing-song in the way it lifts the word and turns it playfully in the air. "Earth to Felix. Are you coming?"
Like he's in a dream, Felix reaches up and takes that hand. Its palm is warm in his, its grip strong as it hauls him to his feet, ignorant of the sharp pain in his chest as he climbs to his feet, Minho a rock against the sway of his body when it protests being upright. Like he's real, like it's possible that he is standing here on the sidewalk in full view of the blazing sun, like he had never gone away at all-
"Come on," he says, their hands sliding apart so that he can throw his arm around Felix's neck instead. The way he drags him forward is relentless, so insistent that any of the words Felix might have said catch in his throat as his focus turns to propelling his feet forwards instead - words like how is this possible and why could they see you and why aren't you dead. Just normal, everyday questions that he'd definitely been prepared to ask when he dragged himself out of bed this morning. Questions every sane person found themselves asking at that point in their lives where their imaginary friend became real, which was a normal and everyday occurance, of course.
He'd spent so much time on that man's couch, being told this was all in his head until he'd learnt to lie about seeing Minho at all. And now...what? All of that had been for nothing? Or he really had lost his mind this time?
Minho walks too fast for him to figure it out, spilling them through the school gates and into the long grey building that waits beyond them, weaving through the crowd of students. Minho makes a beeline for the lockers, following the same path Felix walks every morning, shouldering aside the same kids and shying away from the same beady eyes of teachers. For a minute, Felix thinks it is because he has followed and remembered where to go, hanging off his coattails every day - but then they stop at the locker, and Minho punches in a different combination to the one he's memorised, and-
The locker swings open, and it isn't his locker.
Well, it is his locker. It's the same location, the same 4-1-2 painted on the door; but the untidy pile of books and paper and pens isn't there anymore, the leftover wrappers from snacks, the bits and pieces he has stashed away in the back corner to save for a day he might need them. Instead, everything is organised in a neat row, a jacket folded at the bottom and the rubbish cleaned out and thrown away. Minho's bag swings off his shoulder and slides into its spot on one side, his coat folded over the top of it. 
Felix doesn't realise he's staring, wide-eyed and uncomprehending, until Minho turns his gaze on him. "What's wrong?" he asks, like he can't possibly comprehend how anything out of the ordinary is happening.
Felix shakes his head, his mouth opening and closing as he searches for the words to describe what he's seeing. "How did you-" 
"Lee Minho!" a voice calls over the top of him, loud enough to ring out over the noise of the crowd in the hallway. Their heads swing around at the same time; and there is the principal, her face thunderous and a finger crooked to beckon them toward her. Minho sighs and turns back, slamming the locker closed.
"What did you do?" Felix asks; and suddenly, this feels familiar, like he has fallen into a day in the past that he had just stepped out of for a moment.
Minho gives him a withering look, just the edge of it cut and curved to spare him. "Well, there was the fight outside the school gates," he suggests, so mildly that it circles back around to disparaging.
"Oh," Felix says, and takes stock again of the ache in his ribs, the scrape and bruise of his knuckles. "Right."
Minho laughs and grabs his hand, dragging him further and further into the world.
---
"Do you want to tell me what happened, Minho?" the principal asks, sinking slowly into the chair behind her desk.
Felix shifts uncomfortably under the gaze of her eyes, piercing blue and unyielding. Minho sits quietly, his spine ramrod straight. "They were hitting my friend," he says, without even a breath to steady himself first, "so I hit them back."
Felix has never understood how someone could be as brave as Minho, whose porcelain veneer has never once cracked. Even when they were kids he was like this, unbending and unbreakable, calm in the face of any storm, including the one that darkens the face of the woman before them. Felix has always been the coward, in comparison, hiding behind Minho until Minho was no longer there to be hidden behind. 
"Jinyoung tells me that you were the one who started the fight," the principal says, and lays a hand flat on the desk before her. "Is that not true?"
"Why would I start a fight?" Minho asks. "He's the one that's always getting into arguments. I've never done anything wrong."
The principal isn't fazed, her gaze and her voice steady as she says, "I was hoping that you would be able to answer that for me."
Minho shrugs. "He started it. I finished it. And it wasn't at school, so it doesn't matter anyway."
"Oh, really?" Her eyebrows raise, shooting towards the ceiling. "You think that you can fight on the street in school uniform, and it doesn't have any effect on us here?"
Felix swallows hard and tries not to breathe in - too full a breath will set his chest to aching, and he doesn't want to feel that. He'd like to just run away from here and forget about the whole thing, really. 
Minho doesn't seem to feel the same way. "I'm going to be late to class," he says, and then dips his head as if that makes it less disrespectful to talk back to an adult like that. "If you want to punish me for protecting someone, then just give me detention."
Her eyes narrow, staring at him like she's trying to see past the barrier of his skin and bone to his soul beyond; like she can tell if he's lying if she only looks hard enough to see it written there on his face. "I'll let you off with a warning this time," she says eventually, and leans back in her chair. It's the first time Felix has seen her blink in the last minute. "A warning, Minho. On your file. Permanently. And I'll be contacting your parents."
"Okay," Minho says, shrugging like it doesn't matter. Maybe it doesn't, to him; Minho has good parents. Kind, generous people that had always taken Felix home with them when his parents were still at work or busy with his sisters, who he'd never once seen raise their voices except for the day that-
"And I need the name of the other boy involved," the principal says, a pen poised over a scrap of paper.
"Lee Felix," Minho says, his eyes straying to where Felix sits next to him. Their gaze meets for just a moment - Felix feels like he is clueless, his eyes begging for answers and his mouth hanging open as if to ask the thousand questions that haunt his mind, but Minho's face is blank, his thoughts hiding behind a mask. 
The principal's pen pauses. "Felix?" she questions, the foreign name uncomfortable on her tongue. "We don't have anyone here by that name. You said he was a student?"
Minho glances over again. Felix can't catch his eye this time; it is there, and then gone again, whatever thought he has had calculating itself in his mind before Felix can even catch on. "He goes to a different school," he says, and pretends that his eye doesn't flick down to catch the tightening of Felix's grip on the arm of his chair. 
The principal's face creases, her mouth pressing itself into a thin line. "Okay," she says eventually, her pen tapping unhappily against the table. "I'll look into it. You can go."
Minho lifts himself up out of his chair without another word, turning on his heel and striding out to the door. Felix has to scramble to catch up, nearly knocking his chair over in the process - it teeters on two legs, caught between standing and falling, and then rocks back to its upright position, the impact swallowed by the carpet.
"Don't knock my things over, please, Minho," the principal says, and when she looks up, her eyes stare straight through Felix, to the pause of Minho's receding back ahead of him. A chill runs down Felix's spine at that blank stare, the way her eyes never seem to focus on him, no matter how close they get to seeing. 
"Sorry, seonsaengnim," Minho says, as if it really was him that knocked the chair over, and slips out the door.
---
He's pretty sure, as the day wears on, that Minho is only pretending that everything is normal and nothing is wrong and if Felix brought it up, he wouldn't possibly be able to understand what he is talking about.
It's not the way that he makes no comment except for mindless small talk about things that don't seem to matter, things Felix hasn't talked about with anyone since it was normal all those years ago. It's not the charging forward through the day, from one class to the next and then to sit and eat lunch on a hard metal bench in the tall, glassy cafeteria, and then back to class again. Minho has always been the decisive one, throwing himself forward into life. He'd lived like that, and he'd died like that too, and that's how Felix had always remembered him. 
No, it's not that, but rather...the sidelong glances when he doesn't think that Felix is looking. The way that he picks and twists at that golden ring on his finger, his thumb rubbing back and forth incessantly over the tiny inscription on its surface. It's the way that he's so bent on pretending to be normal that it isn't normal at all, all the tension bunched between his shoulders and twisted around the steel of his spine, tightening and tightening and tightening. 
Even when the day ends, when the bell rings and they circle back to that locker and Minho throws his bag over one shoulder and Felix's arm over the other and drags them all out the gate and back onto the streets, he won't stop and admit that anything is wrong, squinting against the sunlight as he follows the same path home that they've been taking since they were old enough to walk themselves, hand in sweaty hand. 
"Today was so boring," he says, as if he can read the spiral of Felix's thoughts and the questions that are bubbling close to the roof of his mouth. As if he has to say something before Felix can blurt them out, or else he won't be able to live with himself. 
Felix's head swings around, staring at him like he is crazy. "Boring?" he asks, like he can't believe what he is hearing. 
The patchwork of Minho's face stares at him in return; red bruises overlapping pale skin, and the clean split of that cut on his cheek, swabbed and dressed by the school nurse. Minho had refused to let her put anything on it, for whatever reason. Felix didn't think that he was the sort of boy who would try to let it scar just because he thought it was cool, but maybe...
"Yeah," Minho says. "All of our classes were boring. What did we even do all day? Just sit around?"
Felix can't think - even when he tries, casting his mind back to each class in turn, he can't remember a single thing they were supposed to have learnt. There's more important things going on than a little schoolwork. "What about this morning?" he questions. "The fight? The-"
"Boring," Minho cuts across him, quick as a whip. "What's Jinyoung's problem, anyway? He knows better than to mess with me."
He's still angry that you died, Felix doesn't say, his mouth screwing shut. He's still angry that it was my fault. Like Hyunjin, hanging off the coattails of those cruel boys; like Jeongin and Seungmin, transferred to other schools, like Jisung, hiding in the film club room with his head buried in the sand. But he can't say that, not to Minho. Not like this. To acknowledge that he used to be a ghost, and now suddenly he is real, that is one thing, but to tell him outright that he shouldn't be here?
What if he doesn't know?
"I think he was just looking for someone to fight," Felix says. "I don't think he cares who."
"Still," Minho insists. "He should know better."
Felix falls quiet, the words drying in the back of his throat. They're rounding that corner anyway, the one that he hates; off the main road and onto that neat, tree-lined street he'd spent his childhood playing in. He doesn't usually walk this way anymore; he goes to the next street instead and doubles back at the other end, an extra ten minute walk better than having to walk past that house and pretend not to see the eyes that peer out from the windows, watching and watching and waiting for something he cannot-
The house.
Minho stops, his arm around Felix's neck pulling him to a halt too; and here they are, standing in that well-worn place on the pavement that his feet haven't dared to touch in so many years. The house stares back at him, red-brick veneer and cream windowsills silently judging him, its windows eyes that never close and its door the frowning line of a mouth. 
Felix shivers under its gaze, shying away instictively, but Minho doesn't seem to notice, his arm sliding away as he turns to face Felix. "Do you want to come in?" he asks, like it is any day of that last summer they'd spent together, wasting away every hour of sunshine in each other's company. "You could stay for dinner. Or stay over, if you want." 
Yes, Felix's chest says, moments before his throat catches the word short. He hesitates, looking between Minho and that house that he's learnt to detest so much, and finds that he can't think clearly around the ache in his chest, the rise of his heart at the thought of all those days returned again, like nothing had ever happened. And it's easy, standing here and looking at this house, unchanged since the first time he'd lain eyes on it, to pretend that nothing had happened - not this weird day, not the worst one of his life, not all the days in between where Minho had been a ghost at his side, an absence that even the warm air couldn't fill.
"You don't want to stay over?" Minho teases gently, shoving his bag further up his shoulder and swinging open the garden gate. It's an invitation he knows Felix can't refuse; not any day in their childhood, when he'd been in trouble so often for being home late, and certainly not now.
"Of course I do," Felix answers, and follows him down the garden path, closing that neat little white gate behind him.
Stepping into the house is like entering one of the dreams that haunts him night after night, right down to the coats that hang on the rack inside the door, the pile of mail dropped on the side table next to them. Minho toes his shoes off and leaves them stacked neatly at the end of the line, just like he always does, pads down the hall on light feet that make just as little noise as they ever did. 
Felix stares at the row for a moment, his own shoes abandoned on the floor in front of him where he would usually leave them when he was young and still ignorant of things like good manners. In the dreams, he doesn't even notice such a small thing as tossing his shoes in a corner on his way through the door; he supposes that he still does everything the same as he had when he was ten years old, his mind skipping over the details that hadn't seemed important to him back then. The focus of the dreams is always Minho, anyway, not his shoes, or the wind of the pavement that brings him here, or whatever his teachers were talking about in the lessons he sits through with Minho by his side.
(Is this all a dream?)
He picks up his shoes, and adds them to the neat row, side by side with Minho's.
The smell of food cooking wafts through the house, sharp spice and roasting pork, the pot that it sits in warming the air. Minho follows the hum of voices talking with the ease of someone who has grown in the house and never left; in the kitchen, he ducks around the arms of his mother with a deftness that sets a stone in Felix's throat and slips over to the fridge, stealing two apples from within its depths.
"Your school called me today," his father says, leaning over the stove to check a particular pot. Rice, Felix realises when he stirs it, the kernals sticking to the spoon when he lifts it out. "It's not like you to get into fights."
"Mm," his mother agrees. "When I told you to make some friends, this is not what I meant."
"I have friends," Minho says, the fridge closing softly behind him. "I only got into the fight because he was beating up my friend."
His father looks up sharply, his brow furrowed in confusion. "Which friend?"
"Felix," Minho says, and points towards the doorway in which Felix hovers, too afraid to enter the room. 
"Who's Felix?" his mother asks without even a glance towards the door.
A chill creeps down Felix's spine, the blank stare of the principal as she looked right through him replaying in his mind. Surely, it could not be happening again - but then, why would the Lee's ever let him inside their house, after all that had happened? How would they not notice him standing here, waiting to be thrown out on the street? It seems inconceivable, just the way that standing in this house again is.
Minho looks at him, his mind slowly calculating behind those clever eyes. "One of my friends," he says, deadpan, and saunters back across the kitchen to Felix, ignoring the way his mother rolls her eyes at him.
"Where are you going?" she asks his retreating back. "Dinner is almost ready."
"I'm going to lie down," Minho answers. He doesn't even pause as he passes through the doorway - Felix is forced to step back, socks shuffling against the cold tile of the floor, to avoid being run into. He stops in his tracks one step past the doorway, turning back as if he's forgotten something. "I'm sorry about the fight. I'll come and get dinner later."
His mother softens immediately - too kind, too forgiving to her only child. Or maybe not, seeing as he was as trustworthy as she thought he was. "Are you going to sit with us later too? There's a movie on tonight."
Minho's brow furrows. "What movie?"
"Oh, I don't know." She turns to look at his father, gesturing for him to help her. "Some American movie."
"Back to the Future," his father supplies without turning around, busy measuring out a particular ingredient over the pot on the stove.
All at once, Felix's heart stops and his chest constricts, all of the air vacating his lungs at once. He can't draw it back in, can't get his blood beating again; how could this be happening and hasn't this all happened before and-
Minho doesn't seem to notice, his mouth twisting as he considers it. "Sounds boring," he says eventually, shrugging his shoulders. "Maybe I'll just do my homework."
His parents seem unbothered by the declaration, wishing him well on his journey. Minho climbs the stairs without any hesitation, stopping only to drag Felix along with him when he lingers by the kitchen door, his feet screwed to the ground while his mind races ahead, trying to figure out what it means if Minho doesn't remember enough, and he remembers too much.
---
"You're no fun, Yongbok," Minho says in the dead of the night, the carpet rustling as he wriggles around restlessly next to him.
"What?" Felix questions, his eyebrows drawing together. Hadn't they just been talking about school, and plans for the future? Minho had been describing the ideal life of a rock, arms flung lifelessly across the carpet in demonstration. Between pangs of guilt at the sound of this boy he's never seen as a living, breathing teenager talking as if he has a future, Felix had been thinking he should aspire more to be a cat, like the two currently pinning down his right arm, strategically slumped over his wrist and his upper arm to prevent any untoward movement. And then-
"You're so quiet." There's a quiet meow, a protest as he attempts to slide his wrist out from under cat #1. "You're not supposed to be that quiet."
"Not supposed to be..." Felix's eyes move from the cat to the ceiling, turning the words over again in his mind. Studying them from every angle; you're not funny, you shouldn't be this quiet. "What's that supposed to mean?"
Minho pauses his disagreement with the cat, turning to stare at him with dark, unreadable eyes. "The last time you were here," he says, like it's obvious, "you were louder. Omma had to tell you to be quiet because she was on the phone."
His heart in his throat, Felix sits bolt upright, his mouth hanging open as if to ask a question he can't remember the words to. Damp hair falls in his eyes, blinding him; he pushes it back with one impatient hand, slicking his fringe back along the top of his head. From the look on Minho's face, he is sure that it sticks straight up in the air. He doesn't have time to worry about it.
Minho knows something, and he has spent the entire day avoiding saying anything about it at all. Because he wanted to enjoy one last day together, or because he thought it was something Felix wouldn't want to hear? Felix doubts it is because he's scared to say it; Minho isn't scared of asking anything, usually.
You knew him a long time ago though. Maybe things have changed.
"You look like you've seen a ghost," Minho says, and Felix only knows he's joking because they've been friends long enough for him to learn how to read the tone of his voice. Minho grins, a sly upturn of his mouth like a Cheshire cat, but Felix can't find the presence of mind to return the gesture. If anything, he's sure his face gets paler, his head starting to spin at the pressure that builds in his chest, the fear that clutches at his throat with cold hands and won't let go.
"Do you know what happened?" he blurts out all at once, the words spilling over the carpet, and then covers his mouth with one hand as if that will stop him from saying anything else stupid. Hadn't his plan been to not freak Minho out? To approach this with all the finesse he is clearly not capable of?
Best laid plans, and all that. He might as well have just given up the moment he saw Minho step into the sun this morning, if he wasn't going to try any harder than that.
Minho sits up, resting on one crooked elbow around the mass of a disgruntled cat. His gaze is calm in comparison to the jackrabbit of Felix's heart, hammering away in his chest. "Right now?" Minho asks. "Nothing happened right now." He pauses, and then adds, "You look like you're about to pass out."
"Not right now," Felix gasps, trying to ignore how the second part makes him realise that his head is kind of spinning, his vision kind of blurred. "Years ago. When you went away."
"On vacation?" Minho questions (how is he so calm?). "What happened then? We were bored the whole time."
"No, before that-" Felix stops suddenly, realising that he doesn't even know what vacation Minho is talking about. He can't remember any vacation, not from before he died, and certainly not after. "Five years ago. When you-"
Died. He's gotten used to thinking it by now, after long hours sat on a man's couch and longer still looking at the ghost of the boy following him around, always there but never seen by anyone else - but to look him in the eye and say it is a new challenge entirely, a task he cannot rise to the bar for. Instead, he drowns, and gladly. He's never seen Minho so happy as he is right now, grown and content and talking about the future like there is an entire life ahead of him and nothing could ever happen to break them apart.
"When I first saw you?" Minho questions, and everything stops.
Felix frowns. "When you-"
"When you appeared," Minho insists. "That was five years ago. I remember what grade I was in at school."
"I've only been here for one day," Felix says. 
Minho's head shakes, his fringe falling across his eyes. "You've been here for five years. Do ghosts not have very good memories?"
"What?"
Felix stares at him, not computing. Minho blinks. Nobody speaks.
"You're a ghost," Minho tells him again, when it's clear he isn't going to say anything more.
Still, Felix stares. "No I'm not," he replies dumbly, rattling the words off like a machine. "You're a ghost. I'm alive."
For the first time since they started talking, Minho looks upset, his mouth twisting in consternation. "Felix," he says gently, and reaches out to put a hand on his shoulder, not minding the cats as they tumble off his arm, stretching and shooting him dirty looks in compensation for their dignity. "No one else can see you. I don't know what happened to you, but-"
"The boys this morning could see me," Felix says abruptly, cutting him off. "Jinyoung and that."
Minho pauses, curiousity colouring his eyes. "That was weird," he agrees. "How did they do that?"
"How did they see you?" Felix throws back. "No one has been able to see you since-"
Minho waits, and waits, but the words stick in Felix's throat, the confession he hasn't been able to make out loud to himself or to the ghost in the five years since it became a reality. He'd come too close to saying it just now, despite all the time he'd spent convincing himself that this was the worst place to say it. 
"Since what?" Minho questions anyway, nothing if not relentless.
Felix feels it welling up inside him, the confession. The truth that wants to come out, no matter how he tries to chain it down. He's always been a bad liar, even in far more favourable circumstances than this, and Minho knows that. He'd spotted it from the first day that they'd met, as boys in a schoolyard - and he'd learnt to play off it, too, to sit there expectantly and watch him twist himself inside out until he broke. 
Not that there had ever been anything Felix wanted to keep from him anyway. The world had been simpler back then, just school and the walk there and the walk home, and all of the time they could steal from their parents. He'd been an open book before Minho had gone away; he was too soft-hearted to be anything else, too willing to please to ever try undermining.
But this...
You can't tell him, he thinks, over and over again, his fingers digging into the soft ream of the carpet; and yet, he can't think of anything else to say. What could he say, when yesterday one was a ghost, and today he is, and Minho seems to know what happened, but he has no idea, and he's never in his life been able to lie anyway, and-
"You died," he gasps, long moments of silence followed by every syllable all at once. 
Minho stares at him. And then laughs. 
"No I didn't," he says. "How could I have died? I'm right here?"
"You fell on the road," Felix says, his fingers picking at the carpet. "And there was a car - you died, Minho. You died a long time ago."
Slowly, the amusement fades from Minho's face. "But I'm still here," he says again, an argument he can't let go of. "I've never even been close to being hit by a car."
Felix shakes his head. "You've been...you're just a figment of my imagination. I made you up in my head, and you wouldn't go away."
"No," Minho insists. "That's you. I made you up in my head, and now you just follow me around." He pauses, matching the confused frown that draws Felix's eyebrows together, and then adds, "You didn't die though. You just appeared one day...or maybe you moved away when you were little. There used to be a kid called Felix in our class a long time ago."
Felix pauses, several movies coming to mind. Bodyswaps, alternate universes, time travel and what-ifs...except none of that had happened, had it? This morning, everything had been normal, and Jinyoung had apprehended him on the street, and then they'd gone to school and-
No one had been able to see him after they hit him. After Minho stepped in, after he chased them away when Felix was too weak to get up off the ground, no matter how many medals he's won or how much better he knows than to pick a fight he can't win (or to pick a fight at all; he might enjoy it as a sport, but he's no street rat, scuffling in the dirt over some petty bygone).
"It doesn't make any sense," Minho says, stretching out like a cat and laying back down on the floor again. Unconcerned; but then again, if he thinks this is how it has always been, then nothing has changed for him. It is only Felix whose world has turned upside down, who was alive and now is only a thought in someone else's head, a ghost in a place that does not want him.
It's kind of poetic, he supposes, that all those years ago he would have given his life for Minho to come back, and now Minho is alive and he is dead, or not here, or just a visitor until he isn't needed anymore. It's kind of deserved. Maybe this is what the universe had been waiting for, throughout all those years of seeing Minho following him out of the corner of his eye, here to him and yet not to anyone else.
"Hey, Felix," Minho says, just as the spiral of his thoughts steps too far into the dark - and maybe he can see it on his face, echoing there in the lines of the frown etching itself above his eyebrows. Felix turns to look at him questioningly, and finds him staring at the ceiling, one hand patting the cat that is busy settling itself down on his stomach. 
"Why did you make me up inside your head?" the older boy asks.
Felix swallows hard, the lump in his throat like a rock he's lodged there to catch all the words he's still trying not to say. Things like because it was my fault, and I couldn't let you go, which is only the truth, but if Minho didn't like him anymore because of it-
"Because I missed you," he answers - the truth, and yet not really the truth at all. He pauses, and then asks, "Why did you make me up inside your head?"
"Hm." Minho hums, his fingers worming their way deeper into the fur on his cat's back. "Because I was lonely, and you were nice to me in my dreams. I never had a friend like that."
"Oh." The word stutters out of Felix's mouth, the rest of its sentence lost in the corners of his stomach. He'd never heard Minho say anything like that, not when they were just boys. Not when he was a ghost, quietly following him around because he had no other choice. It squeezes at his heart - in pleasure, at being Minho's friend when for so long, so many people would tell him that he wasn't any kind of friend at all, but also in cold pain, because-
How could he be any kind of friend, when he had done what he'd done? 
"You should make more friends," he says eventually, forcing the words out between his teeth that want to say don't be anyone else's friend but mine. 
"That's what omma always says," Minho snorts. "And that therapist."
"They sent you to see him too?" Felix asks.
"Yeah," and he can hear the curve of a smile in Minho's voice, carving the words into sharp edges and flat planes. "Because I see dead people."
"I'm not dead," Felix says.
"But I am?" Minho questions. "That doesn't seem fair."
No, Felix's mouth doesn't say. It isn't fair at all.
---
There's nothing else to do on the second day of being a ghost, so Felix follows Minho to school.
"We could have just skipped," Minho says again as they weave through the traffic in the hallway, his books tucked securely under his arm. "I don't want to go to school anyway."
His heart still in his throat, Felix shakes his head. "I want to go to school," he lies, the same way he had the first time this had happened. "We'll just get into trouble if we skip."
"I'll get into trouble," Minho amends. "You're a ghost."
The reminder doesn't help with the tightness in his chest, nor does the clever smile that plays on Minho's lips even as he takes his hand, dragging him over to their locker. First, the movie playing on TV, now this same day playing out again, just like it had when they were boys...
What was he really doing here? Alive one day, non-existant the next, following around Minho's memory as they relived days of the past? Unless he was just imagining it, or it was all a coincidence, his mind reading too much into what was already an unbelieveable situation.
Just as the thought settles his stomach, he sees the poster, stuck onto the end of the lockers.
SKZ Film Club, it reads, and his mouth turns dry and his blood runs cold.
It's all going to happen again.
"What are you looking at?" Minho asks, realising that Felix isn't listening to whatever it is he is saying, and looms behind him, reading over his shoulder. "The flim club? You want to make a film?"
"You're not in the club?" Felix questions in return, his whole body turning to look at Minho, who just shrugs.
"I know the boys that are in it," he says, "but they're all best friends. I don't want to be the odd one out in a group like that."
Felix is reminded suddenly of the first time he'd seen this poster, hung on a wall in just the next hall over, directing interested parties to a classroom several rooms further away than the one listed on here, and the boys that they had found there when he'd convinced Minho to go; six of them, sat in a circle on desks and chairs, laughing at something Changbin had said just before they'd walked in the room. He's reminded too, of the days that came after they'd made that leap, the friends he'd thought he would keep forever, the summer and winter days they'd clung to each other through.
"Maybe you'd be one of their best friends too," Felix says, like they're ten again and fitting in is all that matters. "You always wanted to be an actor."
"Hm," Minho hums, like he doesn't believe him. "People don't like me like that. Except you."
Felix is so surprised that for a moment he forgets how this story ends, his back turning on the poster. "What are you talking about?" he asks; Minho, seeing what is written on his face, retreats to the locker, burying his head in the open doorway as if that will hide him from the reality he's just created for himself. "Lots of people would like you, if you tried to make some friends."
"Are you trying to say you don't want to be friends with me anymore?" Minho jokes, defensive. "You could just tell me. Float away on the wind or something."
"No!" Felix replies, aghast. "I'm just saying - I don't think they would hate you. I think they'd like being your friends a lot."
Slowly, Minho retracts from the locker, watching him from around the open door. His gaze is sharp, judging - looking for something Felix isn't sure he'll find, down below his skin and bones. "Okay," he says after a moment, slamming the locker closed so hard that it makes Felix jump. "I'll join the club, then."
Felix pauses, long enough for Minho to stand up and stalk away down the hall, sliding between groups of other kids. "Wait," he says, reaching out. "I didn't mean-"
The bell rings, drowning out his voice. Minho doesn't look back, not even to check if he is following - he just keeps walking, charting a direct, determined path towards the open door that leads to the film club, so close that Felix couldn't stop him if he tried. 
This is how it all starts. This is how it all ends.
He should stop him, should run through that hall and shut that door and send him on his way to a safe, lonely existance with no one but a boy no one else can see for company. That would be the safe option - if he did that, wouldn't it stop this chain of repeating events? Wouldn't it stop leading down the same path that it had before? 
And yet, his feet don't move. His hands hesitate. Minho's retreating back is swallowed by the crowd.
He thinks again of those boys, and that endless summer, the happy days that had begun and ended with Minho, that he'd wished so hard and so long to go back to, and...he can't stop him. Can't take that away from him, even though he knows where this road might lead. And even so; does his fear of the ending mean that he should never even let it begin? Hadn't this been part of the wish too - not just that Minho comes back, but that the other boys return too? Hadn't he missed them just as much?
His breath catches in his throat when he gets to the door and looks inside and there they all are, strewn across the desks just like they would have been when they were younger. Even the sight of Hyunjin, the boy that hid within their bullies rather than standing and facing what he knew had happened, lifts his heart; here, he does not frown or suffer. Here, he smiles, the light catching on his face in a way that Felix hasn't seen for several years.
Seungmin is here again, and Jeongin, sitting there side by side the way that they sit side by side in the school across town in his world. Jisung laughs loudly, clinging to Chan's arm to avoid slipping off the desk that he's sitting on, legs dangling in the space between his seat and the ground. Changbin's eyes rove around the room, passing by the door but never focusing in on Felix's pale face peeking in.
Filling in the circle, his back turned to the door, Minho takes a hesitant seat within their group, the light of the windows catching on the smile that slips across his face, and it seems right somehow. Like something that was always meant to happen; a peace that wasn't there before settles into Felix's chest, a certainty that he's done something right rather than something wrong. 
A feeling that maybe he was here to do a job, and this was only the beginning.
19 notes · View notes