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#jungkook one shot
moonchild1 · 9 days ago
jeon jungkook fic rec list (Ⅲ)
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here's a list of my favourite jungkook fics, please show lots of love and support to these wonderful authors and their blogs, some of these fics contain smut so no minors allowed ♡
a- angst s- smut f- fluff ❣- ultimate favourite
trust issues by @7deadlysinsfics f s (drummer jk bar au strangers to lovers au) ❣
The painter by @7deadlysinsfics s a (strangers to lovers au painter jk dom jk)
heartbreak anniversary by @pbandjk f a (exes au dad jk)
heartbreak anniversary 2 by @pbandjk
Making Him Jealous by @parkmuse s (roommate au threesome) ft. Jimin ❣
Zipper by @parkmuse s (best friends au they watch porn together) ❣
The golden boy by @luxekook s (enemies to lovers au) ❣
stay in your lane by @luxekook f s (enemies to lovers au college au) ❣
queen of broken hearts by @bratkook s a (one sided love jk's in love but oc isn't) ❣
Concrete king by @bratkook f s (summer romance)
clairvoyant by @bratkook f s a (shy roommate jungkook college au) ft. Fuck boy Taehyung
merry go round by @lolabangtan s a (infidelity/cheating au) ft. Taehyung
netflix & chill series by @1kook s a ❣
A hero's journey by @hansolmates f s a (best friends boyfriend au pinning au) ❣
superdad by @jimidol f s (dilf jk established relationship au parent au) ❣
two rotten apples by @chickenkooks s a (neighbours who hate each other enemies to lovers au) ❣
not a date by @bubmyg f (enemies to lovers au college au)
spring will come again by @baepsaesbae f s a (virgin jk) ❣
How to Make Him Cum 101 by @mimithings97 f s a (college au)
order up by @ressjeon s (restaurant au strangers to lovers au) ❣
tutor me by @hisunshiine f s (college au student jk tutor reader) ❣
backstage by @hisunshiine s (idol au sowoozoo jungkook 😉) ❣
platinum panther by @arcticmarshmallow f s a (dilf jk spoiled bratty reader) ❣
Daunting by @soobsfae s (yandere stalking milf reader son's best friend jk) ❣
through the night by @nightbts f a (idol au friends to lovers au stylist reader) ❣
I'm kinda into you by @intokook f (fuck boy jk friends to lovers au high school au)
extra credit by @jeonsjiddies s (professor reader student jk)
in between by @luffles424 s (college au twin au) ❣
somewhere only we know by @qersona s a (hybrid au college au) ❣
Golden by @kingsuckjin​ f s a (friends to lovers ex jin cheating au but its sorta sad yandere au) ft. Cheating BF Seokjin ❣
A new what? by @xiaokoo s (boyfriend jk)
first and last by @kookiesjoonies s (friends to lovers au)
once you realize by @kooala f (friends to lovers au)
the best thing he never had by @rosaetae a (friends to lovers au) ❣
The truce by @thebangtantale (enemies to lovers au fake dating au)
Oh brother by @kookdiaries s (brother's best friend au college au) ❣
today's special is... by @dntaewithluv f s (boyfriend jk)
why we broke up by @jjeongukkie a (social media au) ❣
Finding forever by @kookiejoonie f s a (cheating depression violence) ft. Ex husband Yoongi ❣
Cockblocked by @mercurygguk f s a (roommate au friends/idiots to lovers au)
s is for sexy by @kpopfanfictrash f
forsythia by @aechana f s a (band au friends to lovers au slow burn) ❣
learning the hard way by @littlemisskookie f s (noona reader dom jk)
IDLYGF by @taniie (best friends to lovers au teen drama) ❣
Night Changes by @neonlights92 s a (fuck boy jk college au rom com enemies to lovers au) ❣
pen pals (with benefits) by @bangtanhome f s a (enemies to lovers au friends with benefits to lovers au college au) ❣
bare necessities by @gguksgalaxy f s (established relationship au) ❣
candy cane ache by @monvante f s a (enemies to lovers au fake dating au based on the movie the proposal) ❣
friends, lovers or nothing by @pazzarovisky f s a (best friends to lovers? au) ❣
day by day by @hansolmates f s a (dilf jk idiots to lovers/best friend to lovers au) ❣
2K notes · View notes
venusiangguk · a month ago
dilf jk: series masterlist
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>>pairing: jungkook x reader / dilf jk x grocery store clerk oc
>>genre: strangers to lovers, friends with benefits, smut, fluff
>>status: on going
** snacks are drabbles that can be read as stand alones. they are not relevant to the plot. they are not written chronologically, but i order them as such as i go **
most recent work will be labeled: !! NEW !!
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you find a baby in your store and in turn, a dilf finds you
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‎❥⁞ part one: the art of wanting - 10.3k words, (m)
‎you find a baby in your store and in turn, a dilf finds you.
❥⁞ snack: the art of caring  - 4.7k words, (m)
‎jk picks you up after a fight with your roommates... he and nari are better company anyway!!
‎❥⁞ snack: gardening/pool day drabble - 1.2k words, (pg)
nari plays in the dirt while jk gardens and you make a bet
‎❥⁞ part two: the art of playing - 6.3k words, (m)
costumes are a must for jk’s work party... they come with the cutest heart-shaped cuffs... now what could they be used for?
❥⁞ part three: the art of craving - 6.9k words, (m)
‎jk takes you to a bbq at his friend’s house. the tri-tip is good but the creampie is even better.
❥⁞ snack: the art of waiting - 3.9k words, (m)‎ ‎ 
jk comes back from his business trip and he’s wearing new pjs... you must get his face between your legs.‎
❥⁞ part four: the art of doubting - 17k words, (m)‎ ‎ ‎!! NEW !!
seeds of doubt are planted and unfortunately they grow faster than love. things with jk fall apart. 
2K notes · View notes
kpopfanfictrash · 7 months ago
Ember Burning (M)
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Author: kpopfanfictrash
Creative Contributor: @baebae-goodnight​ for this MOODBOARD WOO!
Pairing: Jungkook / Reader
Rating: 18+
Genre: Fantasy / Dragon / Enemies to Lovers
Synopsis:  The dragon riders of Duret Ghal are known across the continent; fierce warriors who take to the skies on their leashed, winged beasts. You are the last Dragon Queen of Ashya, ruler of a dying species who can transform from human to Dragon at will. When a new foe emerges which threatens both Dragon and rider alike, you find yourself forced to broker peace with your former enemy. The King of Duret Ghal, and a dragon rider himself: Jeon Jungkook.
NSFW Warnings: oral (male and female), nipple play, fingering, multiple orgasms, big cock, dirty talk, hair pulling (her to him).... tattooed, man-bun jungkook who has a big sword
Trigger Warnings: somewhat graphic depiction of a shoulder injury  
Word Count: 36,079
Soaring through azure-colored sky, golden wheat fields spread out below, you could almost convince yourself duty did not exist. It was easy to pretend while disconnected from the ground – flight broke the strings which bound you to all mortal beings. You ceased to be of flesh and bone and instead became one with the air, the wind, and the wildness of flame in your throat.
The Thadal mountain range loomed ahead, its jagged peaks piercing the sky. Idly, you wondered if they truly did. Legends said Natal, who had created the world and everything in it, formed the Thadal range last of all. Exhausted by the sheer effort of creation, her hand had slipped, causing the tallest of peaks to rise higher than planned. This ripped a hole in the veil which guarded this world from the next and before Natal could fix it, magic slipped through.
It had been the dragons who slumbered in the mountains’ highest peaks who received this blessing.
Dipping a wing, you wheeled about in the air. With the sun at your back, you surveyed the splendor of your realm laid beneath you.
Ashya, land of the Dragons – of which you were Queen.
Stifling the sigh which rose at the thought, you turned from the furthest rim of the world and began the flight home. A return to duty, to obligation and to your human form, as well as the conflict which loomed on the horizon. Not to mention the sleeping King within your castle walls.
Each of these weighed upon your shoulders, replacing the freedom you’d felt in the air. As you shifted to human, donned a gown, and entered the castle, the sun had barely risen above the lip of the world.
And your true day was only beginning.
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From the thunderous expression on Park Jimin’s face, it was clear you needed to do something, and quickly.
Your choices were either to interject and stop a second war from breaking out at your table or sit back and watch while King Jungkook was pummeled into the ground by the esteemed commander of your armed forces.
Admittedly, the second option was tempting. You would so dearly love to watch the crown knocked from King Jungkook’s perfect tresses, but pettiness was unbecoming when far greater evil lurked on the horizon.
With a wave of your hand, you signaled Jimin to sit back.
The remark which had so enflamed your commander came from one of Jungkook’s advisors, a Lord Kim Seokjin you’d only met once prior. He had insinuated, in so many words, the power of your kind was nothing more than a parlor trick. Something to be taken out at parties, but incapable of truly defending your realm.
Jimin’s steely gaze remained fixed on the Lord, a thin line of steam rising from the seat where he sat. It was never wise to anger a Dragon, especially not a renowned fighter like Jimin. There was a reason he’d been named the youngest commander in over a century, and it was only partly because your people had dwindled in size since the last Dragon War.
The Dragon Wars were the reason it was truly remarkable for you to sit in the same room as King Jeon Jungkook at all. Only a hundred years had passed – barely a blink, in the grand scheme of things – since your nations had been labeled bitter enemies.
Duret Ghal, Jeon Jungkook’s nation, was home to the fierce dragon riders. Warriors who tamed the dull, vicious beasts of the mountains and rode them into battle. Their riders were human, although they fancied themselves important because they dared to treat dragons – albeit a less intelligent kind than your own – as glorified steeds.
You, on the other hand, were a Dragon.
Not one like what King Jungkook rode into battle. Duret Ghal bonded with dragons, mere animals ungifted by magic and unable to transform into humans. You were a Dragon, descended from the first magical beings blessed by the veil. Those who had shifted to the flesh of their enemy to defeat humans on their own terms.
At will, you could shift from human to Dragon with barely a thought. Beneath your smooth, human exterior lurked the scales of a dragon, and Lord Seokjin would do well to remember this while he sat at your table.
Tilting your head, you looked his way. “Would you care to repeat yourself, Lord Seokjin? The way you phrased your objection just now made it sound as though you were doubting my people.”
Although Lord Seokjin hesitated, he met your gaze. This surprised you. Few humans had the courage to look a grown Dragon in the eyes. You were well-aware of the rumors which plagued your people.
Some insisted Dragons held power beyond that of humans. This was untrue, of course. Aside from their shifting, Dragons could not use magic. It was only the offspring of a Dragon and human who could wield magic, often called gifts.
Then there was the rumor Dragons retained scales in places best left unmentioned when they transformed into humans – also untrue. Once you became human, you were nearly indistinguishable from your more stagnant counterparts. The main differences were your skin, which ran hotter, the occasional steam from your lips and hidden embers which flickered in the depths of your gaze.
Your unusual eyes were likely the source of the third rumor. Looking a grown Dragon in the eyes would result in paralysis, or worse. This was also untrue, although you liked to encourage it all the same.
It made meeting human dignitaries much more amusing.
“I am not saying Dragons are not fierce,” Seokjin said, backtracking a little. “Merely observing your numbers have diminished since the last Dragon War. Without Duret Ghal’s riders, you would be at a disadvantage against the Mor Empire.”
To this, you had no response because Lord Seokjin was right. He had easily identified your current problem – Mor continued to press upon your southern border, and there were not enough Dragons left in Ashya to defend it much longer.
To your right, Jimin scowled, knowing the truth to this as well.
It was the main reason you’d decided to meet with King Jungkook at all. The reason you considered entering an alliance with a country who’d once been considered your enemy. The Empire of Mor, a nation of humans, had recently decided to rid themselves of all dragons.
This declaration placed both your nation, Ashya, and Jungkook’s at risk.
Ashya, since you were Dragons and Duret Ghal because they rode them. The Mor Empire was led by Emperor Cyan, whose quest for dominance had consumed him since he was a child. His Empire had already gobbled up the quiet Kingdom of Mica to the west and Kindare, to the south. Now he’d set his eyes on the northern wilds.
His largest obstacle to this was the dragons. Few human soldiers could keep from shitting their pants when a great, winged beast breathing fire rose above their ranks. Ironically enough, the sole reason the Mor Empire stood a chance was because the number of Dragons had greatly diminished over the centuries.
There were two main reasons for this.
The first were the Dragon Wars – centuries of bloody conflict between Ashya and Duret Ghal. During this period, dragon riders had fought Dragons for control of the northern border. The wars had caused untold damage on both sides until a truce had been called to save you from destruction.
The second reason for your diminishing numbers were the humans themselves. In order for a true Dragon to be born, two Dragons needed to mate and continue to bloodline. When a Dragon mated with a human, the resulting child was human. Occasionally, this child was blessed with a magical gift, but not always – and they could not shift into Dragon form. Over the years, your kind had mingled with humans until there were few Dragons left.
Hence the need to align yourself with your greatest foe to protect both your people and his. You needed numbers, which Jungkook had. Emperor Cyan had declared war against all northern realms. Only the might of riders and Dragons together stood a chance against him.
It was a mission of fools though, made even more evident by the blatant ill-will around the table. Releasing a sigh, you glanced to where your most trusted advisor, Min Yoongi, was seated on your right.
Min Yoongi was not a Dragon, but a human born with a gift. He could read the emotions of those in the room and determine whether they told the truth. It was magic he’d inherited from his Dragon mother and had come in handy many times during the negotiations.
Subtle, Yoongi nodded.
You managed to stop a second sigh from escaping. It seemed Lord Seokjin was telling the truth. He truly did respect the Dragons, which made his second statement all the more troubling. It would have been easier had he hated you.
“We may be at a disadvantage without Duret Ghal,” you admitted. “But you are equally disadvantaged without Ashya. If our realm were to fall, Mor would come for you next.”
“We could have this same argument for hours, Your Majesty,” Jungkook drawled, speaking up for the first time. “And we have. I grow tired of this stalemate. What are the terms you require to sign the treaty?”
Jaw tight, your gaze shifted to the King seated opposite. Jungkook stared back at you, his gaze dark and lidded in the flickering light of the fire.
Jeon Jungkook was a young ruler, like yourself, but while your transition of power had been relatively peaceful, his had been anything but.
The former King and Queen of Duret Ghal had been slain by his Uncle, Lord Vonner, when Jungkook was only eighteen. Duret Ghal had been close to signing a treaty with Ashya at the time. In said treaty, your hand in marriage had been promised to Jungkook in exchange for unified lands.
Obviously, opposition had existed on both sides of the treaty, but things had not turned violent until Lord Vonner. He’d risen against his sister and brother-in-law, killing them both in their sleep and claiming the throne. At the same time, he had sent assassins to your land and attempted to kill your parents.
He’d only succeeded in killing your mother.
The blood of Lord Vonner’s actions had ended your betrothal, throwing your lands into chaos while your father roared his revenge. It was only once Jungkook had usurped and executed his Uncle that your land had tentatively agreed not to retaliate in force.
This had taken place nearly ten years ago, and still Jungkook was not yet thirty years of age. His youthfulness was apparent everywhere but his eyes. These had been hardened, darkened by all he had seen and done.
Looking at him now, it was difficult to place the boy you had once known.
“Use of your ports,” you answered. “Free travel for Ashyan merchants along the roads to said ports, and then usage without the current fees.”
Lord Seokjin chuckled. “You must be mad.”
A low growl left Jimin’s throat – a warning. “How ironic to hear you speak of sanity, Lord Seokjin,” he said. “When you dare to insult the Queen of Ashya within her castle walls.”
Holding up at hand, you bade Jimin to cease.
Jimin was even younger than you were, and twice as hot-headed. Admittedly, he had good reason to despise Duret Ghal. His father had been killed in a skirmish on the northern border when he was barely twelve. There was a subset of Ghalians who despised the humans who dared to love Dragons. When a Ghalian woman had fled, seeking the protection of Ashya at the northern border, a mob had fought your soldiers and Jimin’s father had died.
Still, Jimin needed to remember you had a job to do. As your commander, he was well-aware of the weakened state of your armed forces. The treaty between Ashya and Duret Ghal needed to happen in whatever way possible.
Ignoring the interaction, Jungkook merely raised a brow. “No fees?”
Although his voice remained calm, a hint of steel lay beneath the silken words. You could hear it plainly, as did Yoongi based on the way he stiffened.
“No fees,” you repeated.
Jungkook exchanged a glance with Seokjin.
“It is not possible,” he said at last. “Our nation’s ports remain the primary source of income for many Ghalians. Now that Mor has conquered Kindare, they have free access to their ports and fail to use ours. It is only the revenue from Ashya which keeps up afloat.”
“I do not ask you to forsake all payments. Merely those from Ashya.”
Jungkook’s teeth flashed in what might have been a smile but came off as a grimace.
“Ashya provides half the sales at my docks,” he informed you. “By granting your nation free trade, you cut my people’s livelihood in half.”
Somewhat chastised by this, you sat back in your seat. You had not realized Duret Ghal’s economic outlook was so dire.
When Ashya had been a land of only Dragons, the fact you were landlocked had not been a problem. You could simply fly where you wanted and take whatever with. Now though, Ashya had more humans than Dragons and you were forced to find more accommodating solutions.
Ashyan craftspeople were famed for their metalwork, in addition to textiles, but such trade would be useless without people to buy and places to sell. For years, Duret Ghal had steadily increased their tariffs, which in turn had steadily crippled your people.
Returning to Jungkook, you clenched your jaw. “And what would we need to give Duret Ghal in order for our demand to be met?”
The corner of his lip curled.
In this singular motion, you were reminded of Jungkook’s somewhat brutal reputation. After the coup of his Uncle, rumor had it Jungkook had been bloodthirsty in his quest for revenge. Lord Vonner had been put to death in the main square of their capital city, roasted alive by Jungkook’s dragon, Nemrys.
You had not faulted him for this at the time, having also lost people at the hands of Lord Vonner. It was hard to imagine the type of pain Jungkook had gone through, losing both his parents and his throne in a single blow. Despite your understanding, you knew some had disapproved. They’d whispered amongst themselves the King had lost a better part of himself on that day.
“Shares in your mines,” Jungkook said in answer to your question. “Given the current situation with Mor, we’ve had difficulty collecting on some of our foreign loans. A fifty percent share in Ashya’s mines would ease our cash flow problems.”
Your lips tightened in response.
Jungkook had managed to touch upon Ashya’s main source of riches, and a large reason for the previous century’s Dragon Wars. Much of the Thadal range fell within your borders, meaning you owned the majority of gemstones on the continent. It meant little without Duret Ghal’s port cities, however. Mor had ceased trading with Ashyan merchants long ago.
Still, it pained you to grant Jungkook access to your most coveted resource. Everything in your nature – Dragon and otherwise – went against it, but sacrifices must be made for the greater good. You’d entered these negotiations aware this might happen. Another advisor, Lord Kim Namjoon, had warned you of it beforehand and yet, you had hoped.
If you did not find a compromise soon though, Mor would overtake you and the point would be moot.
“Ten percent,” you said at last, lifting your chin.
Jungkook’s eyes gleamed. “Forty.”
Jungkook paused, then glanced at Seokjin for counsel. Bending close to the table, Seokjin scribbled something on a piece of paper and sighed. Looking at Jungkook, he nodded.
“Twenty,” Jungkook said, facing you.
You nodded, but before Jungkook could get too cocky, you held up a hand.
“In return,” you said. “All fees will be waived on Ashyan merchants.”
Jungkook stilled, a lone muscle ticking in his jaw. “I can lower the tariff to a flat rate of two and a half percent, but no more.”
The current tariffs on Ashyan merchants ranged from three to eight percent. Two and a half would benefit all Ashyan merchants, but you were uncertain if Jungkook had more to give. Possibly he was low-balling you, unwilling to show all his cards at once.
Glancing at Yoongi, you watched him slowly shake his head. No, the King was not lying.
Blinking, you returned to Jungkook. You had not expected him to show his hand so quickly. Perhaps he also tired of these negotiations. Gaze narrowed, you attempted to read the young King at the other end of the table.
His face remained blank, as inscrutable as your own. A shiver of something traveled down your spine, although you quickly pushed this away.
“We can accept this,” you said.
Jungkook nodded. “Then we are in agreement.”
Pushing your chair back, you stood from the table. “I think we have made enough progress for today. Lord Namjoon will draw up revisions for the treaty.”
Lord Namjoon nodded, near the center of the table. He was also a Dragon, although he rarely saw battle. Namjoon’s talents lay elsewhere, mainly in crafting legislation which aimed to avoid war in the first place. You could not afford to lose a mind like his to some border skirmish.
As you turned around, the skirts of your gown swept the floor. You’d nearly made it to the door when a firm hand caught your arm.
“A moment, Your Majesty,” Jungkook said, his voice low.
Going utterly still, your gaze shifted to his hand on your sleeve. Glancing up, you wished you truly had the power to turn humans to stone. It would have made these proceedings much easier.
Jungkook had dressed casually for the meeting. He seemed to have come straight from his dragon, since he wore riding leathers. He had no crown, unlike you. Amara, your lady in waiting, had insisted you add the thin, silver diadem before leaving. It lent you an air of authority, she’d said.
It seemed Jungkook could command his authority without such trinkets. The realization made you straighten, meeting his gaze several inches above yours.
“Yes?” you said, your voice frosty.
Jungkook released his grip.
A move you thought wise, all things considered. Behind him, you saw your advisors gathering their reams of paper. They chatted amongst themselves, purposefully ignoring the Ghalian retinue. All except for Lord Namjoon, who spoke politely to Lord Seokjin about a provision of the treaty.
To Lord Seokjin’s right sat Kim Taehyung, a dragon rider whose reputation preceded him. The general of Duret Ghal’s army, he had remained silent throughout the entirety of the negotiations. Based on how often he looked out the window, you got the feeling he preferred to spend his time in the sky and not amongst stuffy people.
Honestly, you could not blame him. Even if his kind of flying were a poor imitation of yours – seated astride a dragon, rather than becoming one himself.
Clearing his throat, Jungkook returned your attention to him.
“Is there something you want, Your Majesty?” you said, growing impatient. “I have a nation to run outside of these meetings, you know.”
A smile curled his lips. “I am aware.”
“So long as you are aware, then.”
You moved to walk past, but Jungkook stopped you again. Teeth gritted, you exhaled steam past your lips.
“What?” you snapped, turning to face him.
Something unreadable stole through his gaze. “We need not have these conversations at all,” he said, dropping his voice. “If you would agree to my original proposal.”
Immediately, your expression shuttered.
“Good day, Your Majesty,” you said and walked past.
This time he did not follow, falling silent as you swept from the room. Yoongi and Jimin joined your exit, the latter tossing a haughty look towards the Ghalians. Namjoon remained in the room, likely to continue his conversation with Seokjin.
As you walked away, you tried and failed to push Jungkook from mind. The offer he alluded to was completely ridiculous.
Seven months prior, Jungkook had sent a message to you after nearly a decade. He’d proposed several items, amongst which was a request to resume your failed betrothal. A list of reasons had been provided. Your nations were on the verge of war, the merger would benefit you both financially and would go a long way towards healing the realms.
Equally politely, you had declined.
It had been a long time since you’d sworn not to marry – or mate, as it were. The mating bond was a possibility for both Dragons and humans. Dragons only mated once in their lifetime, which tended to be longer than ordinary humans. Your parents had been mated to each other, meaning you’d witnessed firsthand the tragedy of their ending.
You would choose an heir when necessary, of course. You weren’t so selfish as to plunge Ashya into civil war when you died because you did not wish to mate. You’d even considered a marriage of practical alliance, one with no chance of mating, but the appropriate circumstances had yet to present themselves.
For this reason, amongst others, you had declined Jungkook’s offer.
Coming to a stop in the hall, you bade Jimin and Yoongi goodnight before continuing on your way. The sun had long since sunk below the horizon. Negotiations with Duret Ghal had taken up most of your time since their arrival in Valor, Ashya’s capital city, nearly ten days ago.
Outside your chambers, you nodded to the guards before entering. Once the door fell shut behind you, you released a sigh.
Straightening, you strode to your dresser and seated yourself at the mirror. As you removed your crown to set on its pedestal, you stared at the silver.
It was not as though you wished to be alone forever. Truthfully, you found yourself exhausted at the end of each day. It would have been nice to fall asleep beside someone and wake with them by your side. Each time you imagined the prospect though, you recalled your father’s death and thought better.
Both Yoongi and Namjoon knew the King had proposed.
Not Jimin, which was for the best. If you had accepted Jungkook’s offer, it would have taken a lot to convince Jimin to remain at his post. He had barely accepted the necessity of a treaty between Ashya and Duret Ghal.
Namjoon had been practical when he heard of the proposal, which you had expected. Lord Namjoon could be practical to a fault, known to ‘factor in’ emotional responses when making decisions. Privately, you thought him a nice foil to Jimin.
When you’d told Namjoon about the King’s offer, he had simply nodded and said it made sense. He acknowledged, of course, the difficulties such a match would present, but did not seem to think it would be a bad idea.
Yoongi had been the one who surprised you. As someone with decisive opinions, you’d imagined Yoongi wouldn’t approve of the match. Instead, he had merely suggested you consider the offer. When you had declined, Yoongi had seemed almost disappointed. It could be hard to tell though, since the Lord usually kept his emotions close to the chest.
Undoing the laces of your gown, you let it drop as you entered your bathing chambers. Amara had left heated water and oils, flickering candles set around the edge of your sunken tub. Lowering yourself to the water, you tipped your head back to rest on the edge.
Today ended only the first week of negotiations between you and Jungkook. Another week remained – you could survive this much, you reasoned. One week from now, you’d have much needed relief for your merchants, along with an ally against the looming threat of Mor to the south.
Only one more week, and Jungkook would be gone.
Ignoring the strange tingle which spread down your spine at the thought, you held your breath and lowered yourself underwater.
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Lips pursed, you stared at yourself in the mirror.
Amara hovered, pins in her mouth while tightening your corset. Your dress for the evening was a mix of old and new – although you despised corsets, this one cinched your waist tight enough for the armor-like bodice. Skirts flowed like water to the ground, brushing the floor with emerald chiffon.
Tonight, you had decided to throw a feast honoring the upcoming treaty with Duret Ghal. The event had not been your idea, but Namjoon’s. He believed it would increase the goodwill between you.
You had protested this until Namjoon pointed out there’d been little to celebrate recently. Realizing the truth to this statement, you’d reluctantly acquiesced to two events. Tonight’s feast and a ball, to be hosted their final night before Duret Ghal left.
Inhaling, your eyes watered as Amara cinched the last hook.
“My apologies,” she said, casting a sympathetic glance in the mirror.
Mutely, you shook your head, not blaming her in the slightest. It was not her fault women's fashion tended to be barbaric, more often than not. It was why you preferred to wear looser gowns, ones you didn’t need your lady in waiting’s help to undo.
Amara had been your companion ever since you were little, although you could not exactly call her a friend. You were her Queen, first and foremost. There was no one else in Ashya for you to call an equal.
“Amara,” you said curiously, glancing up. “What do you think of the Ghalian King?”
Startled by your question, Amara nearly dropped the pins she held. Her wide brown eyes stared back at you in the mirror and briefly, you wondered if she thought this a trap. Possibly you needed to work on your resting facial expressions. Yoongi said you were too harsh, but then again, hearing this from Yoongi was the pot calling the kettle black.
“You can answer me honestly,” you said, a bit gentler. “It has been a long week of negotiations and I find myself wondering what people think of the treaty.”
“Well.” Amara looked thoughtful. “I rather think those are two different questions, Your Majesty. Do you wish to know what people think of the King, or the treaty?”
She was correct, you realized. The two were different, even if they were one and the same in your mind.
“Both,” you responded.
Turning towards the mirror, Amara began to fit the bodice over your bust. It was elaborate, with swirls of silver and emerald stitched into the hard lining.
“Well,” she said, hesitant. “Of course, people think the young King is handsome.”
“He is a rider,” you said sharply.
“It is not as important to humans,” Amara reminded gently. “It does not offend so much as it does the Dragons. And objectively speaking, the King is handsome. He could smile more,” she admitted. “But this does not seem to deter from his handsomeness.”
“I suppose not.”
Seeing your expression, she laughed. “You did ask me to speak honestly, Your Majesty. The people find the King handsome, but they do not trust outsiders. Especially Ghalians. Most have a family member who perished in the Dragon Wars.”
None of this was new information, although it did irk you to hear Jungkook’s looks were a topic of conversation in Valor. It was always like this with men versus women. The moment a male monarch had a somewhat pleasing expression, people were willing to forget all manner of atrocities committed in the past.
“And what of the treaty?” you pressed.
Amara bit down on her lip. “Well…”
“It depends. Some oppose it, much as they did the treaty all those years ago. Others look forward to the potential trade gains. And still others,” Amara said, a knowing edge to her voice, “think you should accept the King’s proposal of marriage.”
Jerking upright, you prompted Amara to nearly stab you with a pin.
“Amara!” you gasped, looking down.
She blinked in surprise. “Yes, Your Majesty?”
“How… did you hear that?” you said, utterly flummoxed.
“It was only a guess.” Amara shrugged, a ghost of a smile at her lips. “Many villagers wondered if there were other reasons for His Majesty traveling all this way. They imagined you must have declined his offer, since nothing official has been announced.”
You stared at her in shock, a bit thrown by the assessment. Perhaps it had been naïve of you to assume no one would guess based on Jungkook’s elongated presence.
“I see,” you said at last. “The skirts, if you please, Amara?”
Sensing you were done with the conversation, Amara nodded and hastened to fasten the fabric. You stared at the dress in the mirror, willing your racing pulse to slow.
Your gown for the evening was emerald green; one of the colors of Ashya, along with the color of your scales as a Dragon. It had always been a source of pride for your parents, as though Natal herself had proclaimed your destiny.
As Amara arranged your train on the ground, you stared at your reflection. Most of what she said you had already known. Ashya had been divided for a long time now on how to proceed with Duret Ghal. You knew whatever choice you made, there would always be those who opposed you.
And yet, it was strange to hear some rooted for a union.
Glancing at Amara, you found yourself curious. “And what do you think?” you asked. “What is your opinion of the Ghalian King?”
Amara’s fingers hesitated on your hem.
“Me?” she said as she straightened. “I am sure I do not know, Your Majesty. I do not know the King personally, so it is hard to say.”
You nodded, having assumed as much.
“Although…” Amara hesitated, drawing your gaze back to her. “How a person treats their servants is usually indicative of their personality. Take Lord Larkin, for example,” she said, naming a wealthy noble at your court.
“What about him?”
Amara looked down. “His servants are skittish. They mostly keep to themselves at the request of their Lord. It is rumored he keeps a strict household, and his wife is inscrutable.”
Knowing what you did about Lord Larkin, these facts did not surprise you. He had an archaic mentality of most things – dutifully, you filed this information away for later use.
“What of His Majesty, then?” you said. “How do his servants treat him?”
“They seem to admire him.” Amara stood straighter. “From what I have seen, they seem to genuinely enjoy working for him and respect him. I know he has a fearsome reputation, but… perhaps it is only towards his enemies.”
“Whom we used to be,” you noted drily. “Until now.”
Her head bobbed in a nod. “This is also true.”
Despite this, Amara’s words lingered as you finished dressing. It was quite possible your feelings for Jungkook personally had clouded your judgement of him as a ruler.
There was not time to linger on this, since Yoongi arrived soon after to escort you to the great hall. You would be the last to arrive for tonight’s feast, which was customary.
Noise from the hall grew as you approached the doors. Tonight’s event would be more casual than the ball a week from now, but casual was relative since you’d been forced to wear a corset and the meal would feature no less than twelve courses.
As the doors swung open and you began to walk in, all noise within the hall ceased. Ashya’s great hall had seen centuries of celebration, along with conflict and conquest. At one point during the Dragon Wars, Valor had been briefly occupied by Duret Ghal. During this time, the banners hung on your walls had been blue and gold, instead of emerald and silver.
Entering the room with Yoongi at your side, you sensed the gaze of every inhabitant upon you. Focusing straight ahead, you did your best to ignore this. It had never felt natural to you, being the center of attention. You did so for the sake of appearances but had never enjoyed the sensation.
At least you had Yoongi, who looked handsome as usual in his formal attire. With his dark, sweeping hair and keen gaze, Yoongi would have made an excellent King consort. Unfortunately, your relationship had never progressed in this direction and frankly, Yoongi was not important enough to consider marriage without love.
Glancing your way, Yoongi caught your eye. “Is there something in my teeth?” he muttered.
Stifling a laugh, you faced forward.
“No,” you said. “I was only thinking about choices.”
Although Yoongi arched a brow, he said nothing in response. Now was not the time for an in-depth conversation. People bowed as you passed, a veritable rainbow of fabrics and colors. At the front of the hall, a table had been placed atop the raised dais. Behind it, the banners of Ashya and Duret Ghal had been strung.
High above, evergreen boughs entwined with the chandeliers, carefully spaced so they would not catch fire. Evergreens were considered sacred, symbols of Natal’s everlasting power. Although the winter solstice had not yet arrived, the air in Ashya was cold enough for them to thrive.
Your visiting guests had already arrived you saw as you approached the dais. To your surprise, you saw women traveled in Jungkook’s party. On the other side of Taehyung stood a lady with dark hair, right hand resting on the pommel of her sword.
Although both genders fought in the armed forces, it was still considered an unusual path for a woman. It was a pleasant surprise to see both men and women amongst the soldiers Jungkook had brought to greet you.
Seokjin wore robes of deep purple tonight, eschewing the colors of either nation. It was nearly as bold a statement as Taehyung, draped in the royal blue of Duret Ghal beside him. As you neared the table, both of them stood, and your gaze finally fell upon the man at the center.
Jungkook was already on his feet, a golden crown on his head in contrast to your silver.
Your gaze traveled lower, realizing he’d worn robes of midnight blue as well. His waist had been bound in a golden sash, robes flowing to accentuate his trim thighs. At his side, his sword remained hidden, a decorative golden tassel placed before the hilt. It was not the broadsword you’d seen him wear on his dragon, but a more formal rapier made for ceremonies and balls.
His gaze lingered on you as you approached, sweeping your body in similar fashion. Your skin burned each place he lingered, flames consuming you from the inside.
At the bottom of the steps you paused, and Jungkook inclined his head. His gaze remained fixed on yours the entire time.
After ascending the dais, you stood before your chair and surveyed the room. Long rows of tables and benches stared back, along with the faces of your many subjects. Taking a deep breath, you raised your chin.
“Citizens of Ashya and Duret Ghal,” you said, your voice ringing out. “We gather this evening in uncertain times. Much as Natal crafted the first light from darkness, so are better things forged in the fire of adversity. Although dark days lie ahead, I know they will only strengthen our bonds to each other.”
At your side, Jungkook listened with rapt attention. The rest of your speech was conciliatory, bland words about coming together for the betterment of both nations. Namjoon had written most of it and, in the corner of your eye, you saw him mouthing the words.
You only went off-book once, near the end.
“It is important now, more than ever, to remain united in the face of such a foe. Mor seeks to wipe us from the map – and why? It is because we are strong.” The entire great hall had gone silent, focused on your words. “We have what they will never obtain and so, they seek to destroy it. To destroy us, but I will not let them. We will not let them,” you corrected, glancing a Jungkook.
He looked at you and nodded.
“And when they do come to face us,” you said, turning forward. “We will show them exactly why they were right to fear our teeth and claws.”
A roar echoed through the hall, several shooting to their feet to vocalize approval. Turning around, you sat in your seat as gracefully as you could and arranged your gown.
Jungkook was next and once he began speaking, Yoongi leaned over.
“Nothing like a little bloodlust to get the party started,” he murmured.
You winced. “How bad was it?”
Yoongi chuckled. “They seemed to enjoy it. Lord Namjoon might not forgive you so easily.”
Glancing down the table, you saw Namjoon rubbing wearily at his temples. You nearly laughed at the sight, schooling your features to neutrality when you remembered Jungkook still spoke.
His speech was brief, which did not surprise you. During the time you’d spent in his presence, Jungkook struck you as a man with little bullshit, or patience.
Once he was finished and seated beside you, you waved a hand for the meal to start.
In the corner of the room, a string quartet began to play. Doors opened on both sides, allowing servers inside holding trays of food. As the first course was set before you – a medley of greens with spiced, mashed nuts – you reached instead for your cup of wine.
Even this strained your bodice, but you managed. One of the many perils of being a woman in power was navigating foreign dinners while wearing a corset.
“The ballroom is beautiful,” Jungkook said by your side.
Surprised, you turned. “Small talk, Your Majesty?”
He shrugged and took a bite of his greens. “You do not seem inclined to discuss important topics outside of our negotiations.”
“And what important topics would you care to discuss?”
Jungkook paused, setting down his fork to face you fully. Eyes gleaming, his lips parted, and you felt your heart start to race.
Yoongi cleared his throat at your side.
Both of you turned to stare at your advisor.
Eyebrows arched, Yoongi motioned towards the front. “The greeting line has begun,” he said.
Realizing he was correct, you sat back in your seat. Already, the line of subjects stretched down the main aisle. Lords and ladies, merchants and townsfolk, all attempting to curry favor with their monarchs. Reaching out, you gripped your wine glass to drink again. Yet another reason you disliked feasts, balls, and the like.
The politicking side of ruling had never come naturally to you, although you did practice. It meant endless hours of hobnobbing, spending time with people fawning for your favor. Still, it was important to meet with your citizens and hear their concerns. If only most of your court weren’t completely unbearable.
Inclining your head, you allowed the first two to come forward.
When they came into view, your expression softened. You had expected nobility, and instead found yourself faced with two tradespeople, by the looks of them. The man and woman had worn their best attire, immaculately neat under the scrutiny of court.
“Merchant Calum and his wife, Natalia,” said the announcer at the front.
You smiled in response to their curtsy and bow.
“Thank you for coming,” you said, and gestured for them to rise. “We are so glad you could join us tonight.”
“It is our honor, Your Majesty,” Natalia said, looking up.
“Is there something particular you came to discuss?”
Her gaze slid to Jungkook and you tried not to stiffen. Likely, they had come to see the King of Duret Ghal. It had been more than ten years since Jungkook had last entered Valor. 
“No, Your Majesty,” she said, her gaze sliding to you. “No favor to ask. We simply wished to see you in person. I apologize for my husband’s lack of speech in your presence,” she said, reaching for his hand. “He lost the ability during a fire in the mines years ago.”
“I see,” you said gently.
Looking at him, you signed your thanks for his attendance tonight. The man brightened, signing back gratitude for the invitation. His wife beamed, thanking you once more as the announcer stepped forward to hurry them on. It seemed their allotted time in your presence was up.
As they left, Jungkook glanced at you curiously. “Where did you learn how to sign?”
“Occasionally, one wishes to communicate without being overheard.”
Jungkook allowed the matter to drop but continued to look your way.
The true story was longer.
A year before your father had passed, you’d decided to join the Ashyan forces. You had called it a part of your training, but the reality had been the castle was empty and cold after your mother died.
No one had known who you were when you enlisted. You’d entered a regiment far enough away for few people to have ever walked the streets of Valor. It was where you’d met Jimin, whose parents had been Dragons of relative unknown. Under your parents’ regime, Jimin would never have been named commander.
This had been one of the first laws you overturned after your coronation – the blood laws, which had decreed only noble lines could serve in certain positions. Jimin was more Dragon than most of the realm. He fully deserved the title of commander.
While you served in the army, you’d also fallen in love for the first time. Leo had been human, from a western province so far away, it nearly fell off the edge of the map. An encounter with riders had left him without speech, so everyone in your regiment had learned to sign to communicate.
Unsurprisingly, your love had not lasted. As soon as Leo discovered who you were, things had come crashing down. When your father’s condition had worsened and you returned to the castle, your title and demands were placed on display.
Leo was ultimately forced to make a choice – a life of duty with you, or relative freedom in the western wastes. He chose the latter.
None of this was pertinent to your conversation with Jungkook though, and so you kept quiet and welcomed the next guest. A wealthier Ashyan merchant, to whom you made veiled references about lower tariffs which seemed to please him.
Once he had gone, you realized Jungkook continued to glance your way. Ignoring him, you motioned for the next group to be brought forward, but when they came into view, you stiffened. Following your gaze, Jungkook took in the two men who’d made you go still.
Lord Larkin and his son, Lord Declan – the very same nobility Amara had spoken of earlier. While you’d never liked the pair of them, your opinion had obstinately worsened based on what she’d said.
Lord Larkin bowed, silver hair shining in the candlelight above. His son, Declan, lowered his head as well. You waited a moment longer than necessary before asking them to rise.
“Lord Larkin,” you said flatly. “And Lord Declan. What a pleasure to have you both attend tonight.”
“The pleasure is ours, Your Majesty,” Larkin said with a nod. Casually, he glanced at Jungkook. “We wished to extend our welcome to the rider King, as well. It is certainly unusual to see a human seated beside an Ashyan Queen.”
Jungkook merely smiled.
Admittedly, the gesture didn’t do much to brighten his countenance. The warmth of his smile failed to reach his gaze. On the table, Jungkook tapped his long, agile fingers. You realized with some surprise they had been inked.
Tattoos were not uncommon amongst soldiers, but it was rare to see them amongst members of nobility. You found yourself curious what other marks the King bore.
“I imagine it would be unusual for any man to side beside your Queen,” Jungkook said calmly. “Dragon, rider, or any variation within.”
The implication to Lord Larkin was clear – you are not seated beside her, either. Seeming to understand, Larkin’s eyes flashed while he inclined his head.
You fought not to smile.
Lord Larkin owned two of the largest mines in the Thadal range and was integral to the Ashyan economy. It would be unwise to anger him or his family, a line you’d tiptoed around since your coronation. Especially once it became clear Lord Larkin wished to align his son, Lord Declan, to you in marriage.
For a while, you had considered the idea. Their family was powerful, in possession of both lands and titles which would enrich the crown. Lord Declan was also a Dragon, ensuring the royal Ashyan line would continue unhindered.
It had been Yoongi who advised caution. You were still young, new to the throne and with plenty of time to make an heir. Better to first gain control of your nation and consider the offers of a political marriage after. You had known even then Lord Declan was not your mate, no matter how much his father wished for him to be.
Mates were a mysterious thing in your world. They could be either Dragon or human and did not always present themselves in an obvious manner. A person could stand before their mate several times before realizing the bond.
People spoke of the signs, though. Some likened the beginnings of the bond to slow trickles of energy. Others described it as sparks caressing their skin. Still more mentioned an invisible thread which tied them to one another.
None of this you’d felt with Lord Declan, so you felt fairly comfortable saying he was not the one. And yet, you knew Lord Larkin would continue to bide his time.
“It is unusual for a male to sit by my side, you say?” you mused, sipping your wine. “Whatever do you imagine Lord Yoongi to be, Your Majesty?”
Lord Declan laughed, which prompted a glare from his father.
Jungkook tore his gaze away from the Lord. He glanced instead at Yoongi, who seemed determined to ignore your conversation while he finished his greens.
“A very pretty piece of décor,” Jungkook said at last.
At this, even Yoongi smiled. Stifling a laugh, you returned to the Lords who remained standing before you.
“He is most horrified to hear it, I am certain,” you said. “Although if His Majesty considers Yoongi’s looks to be his best asset, perhaps he is the foolish one at this table.”
Jungkook smiled at this, reaching out for a sip of his wine. He seemed more relaxed, less formal and you marveled at the change in his features.
“Is there anything else you wish to discuss?” you said, returning to the Lords.
Their time with you had been longer than the townspeople but then again, this was oftentimes the way of things. Lord Declan nodded, but Lord Larkin simply looked thoughtful, glancing between you and Jungkook. At last, he bowed his head.
“That is all,” he said. “Thank you both for your hospitality.”
Once they had left, you sagged in your seat.
“Pretty.” Yoongi snorted. “I shall have to write home and tell mother immediately.”
Jungkook laughed in response – a real, honest sound which made your heart flip in your chest. It was your first time hearing such a noise from his lips during this visit. It fractured your thoughts into a million pieces.
Rather than confront any of these pieces directly, you looked at Yoongi. “Now, there is food in your teeth,” you said.
Yoongi shrugged, lifting his spoon to fix his reflection. Returning to the waiting line, you gestured the next guests forward.
The rest of the evening passed smoothly. Most of your conversations were kept short, allowing only enough time to greet and move on. By the end of the line, your head was beginning to ache.
Collapsing into your chair, you released a sigh. The line, consumption of wine and lack of food had begun to create the perfect storm. At the next lull of music, your stomach growled in a most unbecoming fashion.
Closing your eyes, you prayed to Natal no one had heard.
“Have you eaten at all?” Jungkook asked from your side.
Opening your eyes, you wondered if perhaps the goddess was busy. Or maybe she simply didn’t care about mortal whims and petty Queens. Looking to your side, you found Jungkook frowning at your full plate.
“I have eaten some,” you said, and cut into the meat.
Before you could stop him, Jungkook had raised a palm to signal the server. “Was there a problem with your plate?” he asked, returning to you. “Or do you simply prefer to eat alone?”
Startled by how earnest Jungkook sounded, you were silent while waving the server away. The poor man fumbled a little, taking a few steps backwards before he turned around.
“Nothing of the sort,” you said, glancing at Jungkook. “The food is fine, and I do not care about eating before others.”
He seemed baffled. “Then, what is it?”
“It is my corset,” you hissed, lowering your voice. “Or have you never sat beside a woman at dinner before?”
Jungkook’s eyes widened, drifting below your neckline. Amara had done an exceedingly good job at making certain you filled out the bodice. A lone muscle ticked in Jungkook’s jaw before he looked up.
“I have sat beside women before,” he said.
“What a delight.” Reaching out, you plucked wine from the table. “I am glad to hear it is not my responsibility to teach you about the fairer sex.”
His gaze narrowed. “Corsets are not as fashionable in Duret Ghal as they are here, Your Majesty,” Jungkook said lowly. “I have never had the pleasure of removing one before.”
Gaze snapping to his, you met his darkened stare. A flicker of heat curled in your belly, making you feel even more light-headed.
Before you could respond, Seokjin asked a question and Jungkook was forced to turn away. Hastily, you sat back and faced forward again. Reaching again for your glass, you took a large sip of wine.
Amara was not wrong. Jungkook was handsome and you were no better than the many people who’d come here tonight to look at the attractive, young King. Inwardly, you cursed your weak morals.
“He is not wrong, you know.” Yoongi continued to chew on your other side. “You should eat before coming to these events, Your Majesty.”
You shot him a look. “And when I desire your opinion, I shall ask it, Lord Yoongi.”
“I thought you paid me to advise you?”
“Only under specific circumstances.”
“And what circumstances would those be?”
“When I ask.”
Yoongi laughed, setting down his fork to reach for his glass. “Will you at least send up food to eat afterwards?’
“Of course,” you said, pushing your meat aimlessly away. “This is not my first gathering, you know.”
Yoongi nodded and the two of you fell into comfortable silence. The conversation had lessened some of the tension between you and the King. And yet, you continued to be aware of his presence beside you.
On the table, his hand rested close enough for you to see. Tanned fingers entwined with black ink, his palms roughened by callouses, proof of the leather he gripped when he rode.
Jaw taut, you continued to drink from your glass of wine. Long before it was considered polite, you yearned to stand and retire for the evening. People danced after the final courses, but it was a paltry thing compared to a real ball.
Once most of your guests had begun to leave, Namjoon agreed it was acceptable for you to go. With great relief, you stood and said your goodbyes. Yoongi went with you, following you towards a separate hallway to avoid foot traffic in the castle. Halfway down the hall, you heard someone say your name from behind.
Turning around, you found King Jungkook striding towards you. His robes swished about his ankles, head held high despite the wine and the hour. As he came to a stop, you turned towards your advisor.
“You may go, Yoongi,” you said, dismissing him. “I will return to my rooms after speaking with His Majesty.”
Yoongi hesitated, then took his leave. You watched him disappear down the hall, waiting until he turned the corner before you spoke again.
“It will seem suspicious for us to leave at the same time, Your Majesty.”
Jungkook made a dismissive noise. “I am not concerned by the thoughts of people in there.”
“An odd way to think of your subjects.”
He considered you standing before him. “You have a very low opinion of who I am and how I run my Kingdom.”
“No,” you said. “Merely of the idea of you running mine.”
Jungkook blinked, taken aback by your statement, but his confusion did not last long. After a moment, he stepped forward to close the space between you.
“Is this what you think of me?” he asked, voice low. “You think I asked for your hand in marriage – why? To become King of Ashya without the difficulties of waging war?”
“It would be a practical way to go about it.”
Jungkook’s gaze scanned your features. “I do not desire to rule Ashya in your stead. Merely to provide the best solution for both our peoples.”
Standing this close, you could feel the heat from his body. His scent was a living thing, wrapping your limbs, coaxing you closer – teeth gritted, you fought the need to take a step backwards.
“That is what you say, Your Majesty.”
He stiffened. “Are you calling me a liar?”
“I believe there are things you do not tell me.”
“And what about you, Your Majesty?” Jungkook tilted his head. “You have declined my offer of marriage and have yet to give a reason.”
“Do I need to give you one?”
“I would like one.”
“I should think you used to disappointment by now,” you said. “Such is the lot of Kings and Queens.”
He stared at you for a moment, his features softened by candlelight. A feeling almost like regret stole through you, gone before you could fully embrace it.
“Do you remember the last time you visited Duret Ghal?” Jungkook asked, which surprised you.
You stared at him a moment. The suddenness of the question pushed all retorts from mind. Thus far, you had held firm to your vow not to marry by convincing yourself the man standing before you was your enemy.
Now though, he asked if you remembered.
In truth, you did.
It had been your seventeenth birthday when you last traveled to Duret Ghal. The occasion had been to finalize your parents’ treaty, as well as formally meet Jungkook as your betrothed. You had met a few times before then, as children, but it had been a long time since those days.
Duret Ghal was a land of icy wilderness, except during the summer, when harsh winter snows melted to expose greenery and cliffs. Rumors said the dragons kept their bays clear of ice, but you had gone at the wrong time of year to see this in person.
To the north of Duret Ghal lay the Irik Sea, a fathomless expanse of foamed troughs of water. Its only mountains to speak of were the famed Cliffs of Oria, which circled the capital city of Ebril. It was within these cliffs the famed dragons nested.
Ebril was situated along the coast, known equally for seamen as much as their riders. The people of Ebril were known to be craggy and sharp, much like the topography. Despite their reputation, Ebril was a city of learning. Built from the white limestone which lined its cliffs, it was occasionally referred to as the jewel by the sea.
Ebril had not been the only thing which fascinated you on that trip. You had found Jungkook equally intriguing.
He had been different then. Still quiet, but in a studious way. His hair had been shorter, as though he could not be bothered with the time it took to comb it.
Upon your arrival, you had thought Jungkook hated you. He could not seem to stand being in the same room as you for very long. Still, he had not seemed antagonistic and so, you had resigned yourself to a loveless marriage and spent time exploring the city.
One morning, you’d woke to find the day warm enough for a trip to the cliffs. Your parents had been busy from sunup to sundown, negotiating the treaty you now found yourself crafting. Back then though, you’d been blissfully free of obligation and duty.
Having never seen the Cliffs of Oria, you’d gone to the stables to secure a mount. Strictly speaking, you did not need one as a Dragon. Ideally, you preferred to fly by yourself, but your parents had warned you against shifting in Duret Ghal.
Although some things had changed since the Dragon Wars, many Ghalians still did not trust your kind. It was never a good idea to push boundaries, especially not when the treaty depended upon it.
You had even borrowed Amara’s clothes in an attempt to blend in. It had been a practical move on your part, since you’d been packed only dresses.
When you’d arrived and requested a horse from the palace stable hand, he had looked you up and down before sneering.
“You’re Ashyan,” he’d said upon hearing your accent. The word Ashyan sounded like a curse. “I heard some of your kind had come to the castle. Thought you could fly without horses, huh? What need do you have with a Ghalian mount?”
You’d been so taken aback, you blurted out the first thing which came to mind.
"If you know so much about Ashya,” you’d told him, gaze hard, “then surely you know more humans live within its borders than Dragons. Humans cannot sprout wings any more than a man like you can see reason.”
The man’s eyes had bugged, taking a threatening step forward – as a soft laugh echoed through the courtyard. Surprised, both of you had turned towards the sound.
In the archway of the stables, Jungkook had shut his book in one hand. “That was funny,” he said, looking at you.
Upon seeing the Prince, the stable hand had paled.
“Your Highness,” he said, hastening to bow.
Jungkook’s gaze slid towards him, any trace of humor disappearing. He stared at him coldly and for a moment, you’d seen a hint of the King he would become.
“I believe the lady asked for a horse.” Jungkook had spoken calmly. “Were you about to deny the request of a royal guest to the crown?”
He did not call you the princess and for a moment, you had wondered if he knew.
“Of course not, Prince Jungkook,” the stable hand had stammered and for a moment, you’d felt a modicum of pity for him.
Then the man had cast you a dark look entering the stables and you'd quickly forgotten your mercy. Instead, you’d found yourself wondering how loud he’d scream if you shifted.
Jungkook cleared his throat.
Looking at him, you’d found him lingering in the entrance to the courtyard. Curiosity washed through you, wondering if he intended for you to thank him. The idea was vaguely insulting. You could have handled one measly human.
“I did not need your help, you know,” you had said.
Jungkook had merely arched a brow. “Oh, I am aware.”
Turning around, you had considered the conversation to be over. While you stood and waited for your horse though, you realized Jungkook did not leave. After another moment, you’d turned towards him.
“Then, why did you interject?” you’d asked, suddenly curious.
Rather than answer immediately, Jungkook had crossed the courtyard. He came to a stop before you, forcing you to tilt your head back to see him. For a human, you remembered him being quite tall.
That close, you’d seen Jungkook’s eyes for the first time. They were not all brown, as you’d imagined. Instead, you saw many colors within – auburn, hazel, and a deep, burnished gold. 
Meeting his gaze frankly stole your breath away.
“You are my guest,” Jungkook had said. “And my betrothed. It is my duty to protect you.”
Looking away, you’d tried not to smile. Despite the fact you were trying not to laugh, it felt oddly wrong to be free of his gaze.
“Why are you smiling?” Jungkook had asked, confused.
“I am sorry,” you had said, biting back a smile. “It is only… well. Is that how women are raised in Duret Ghal?”
“I beg your pardon?”
Before you could answer, the stable hand had emerged with a horse in tow. Accepting the reins he gave, you’d placed a foot in the stirrup and swung into the saddle. Settling your weight, you’d leaned forward and pet the horse’s long mane.
Glancing up, you’d locked eyes with Jungkook. “You speak of women as though they need protection. I must say, it has never been something I needed or wanted,” you’d said quietly, then clicked your heels and steered the horse away.
You had not looked back as you rode from the castle, but felt the weight of his gaze between your shoulder blades the entire way. It had sent the strangest energy across your skin but once you reached the trail, you managed to push both this and Jungkook from mind.
The sea had always been a subject of endless fascination for you. Crossing the grassy plains which topped the Cliffs of Oria, you’d found satisfaction in the salty taste of the air.
After nearly an hour of riding, you’d slowed to a stop. Before you, the Irik Sea had stretched in an endless display of blue. It reminded you of the sky with its limitless potential. As soon as you thought this, you had the dearest wish to fly.
Glancing away, you realized you’d seen no other humans for miles. Quietly, you slipped from your horse and tied him to a tree.
Entering a nearby thicket, you’d changed from your clothes and placed them under a rock. When you transformed to a Dragon, it tended to shred whatever clothing you wore.
Naked as the day you’d been born, you stood under the sky and tipped your head back. Allowing the transformation to take hold, warmth had spread through your veins until – opening your eyes, you were a Dragon.
Humans referred to this as the change, but you’d never found it to be an accurate descriptor. It was not as though you changed from one thing to the other; merely shifted to a different part of yourself. You were always a dragon and always a human. To be a Dragon was to be both.
Wings unfurled, you’d bent and leapt into the sky. It always took you a moment to reorient after shifting. Your senses of sight, smell and hearing were sharper as a dragon, although some things were different.
Beating your wings against the sea breeze, you’d risen and fallen while surveying the cliffs. From this height, you’d been able to see the smaller cities which dotted the fields of the capital. Ebril shone like a star on the distant shore. Instead of flying towards this, you turned in the opposite direction. You had no desire to be seen and send their women into hysterics.
Remembering Jungkook’s words, a jet of flame left your nostrils in a wicked snort. The idea of protecting a Dragon was laughable. Wheeling sideways, you’d traveled further out over the ocean. It had been silver-green at the time, bright as the clearest Ashyan jewel.
Growing bolder, you’d flown lower and skimmed the waves with your toes. Swooping higher, you’d circled again before diving straight down. When you plunged beneath the surface, the coldness of the Irik snatched fire from your lungs. Sputtering, you’d breached the surface and shot into the air to hang there, gasping.
Then you grinned and dove again.
For the first time in months, you’d allowed yourself to have fun. Ever since you’d turned sixteen, you’d become infinitely aware of your title and duty. Your duty to marry, to someday become Queen and leave your childhood behind. You’d wondered why you needed to give up fun and freedom, all for someone else’s hand.
In truth, the idea of marriage had scared you. Riders enjoyed taming dragons, or so the legends had said. They’d taken your ancestral creatures and turned them into beasts who willingly did their bidding. You had no desire to do anyone’s bidding but your own.
After a long day of flying, you’d tucked in your wings and returned to the cliffside. Although you had told your parents where you were going, they would worry if you were not back in time for dinner. Approaching the spot where you’d left your things, you realized a second horse had been tethered beside yours.
Searching the plains, you’d immediately spotted Jungkook. He lazed in the sun at the edge of the cliff, book open on his stomach and one arm behind his head.
He did not so much as look up when you landed, although the noise from your wings must have been deafening. Dropping into the thicket, you’d quickly returned to human form. With trembling hands, you’d pulled back on Amara’s clothes.
As you exited, Jungkook remained in his same position. Upon seeing him there, you’d stopped and looked away. Perhaps he had not seen you after all.
“How was your swim?” Jungkook had asked, eyes still shut.
Your stomach had dropped.
“I can explain,” you’d said, stepping forward.
One eye opening, Jungkook had frowned. Pushing himself to his elbows, he’d surveyed you and it had struck you suddenly how beautiful he was. Brown curls and soft gaze, above a lean body.
“What do you have to explain?” he’d asked, sounding curious.
“I – well.” For the first time, you’d found yourself flummoxed. “I did not mean to take advantage of Duret Ghal’s hospitality.”
This seemed to amuse him. “Are you… apologizing for using the sky, Your Highness?”
“No. Well, yes.”
Something in your expression made Jungkook soften. Closing his book and setting it aside, he’d stood from the ground and began to walk closer. He came to a stop near enough to see the tiny mole beneath his lip.
“Some Ghalians fear Dragons, it is true,” he’d said quietly. “But you need not ever fear this from me, Your Highness. If someone asked you not to fly in my Kingdom, please consider this to be a formal revocation.”
You had stared at him a moment before arching a brow. “It could be dangerous to fly, though. I might be in need of protection.”
Jungkook had paused for a moment before laughing, his head thrown back and smile wide. It was the same laugh he’d made tonight at the banquet.
“Forgive me for earlier,” he’d said, lowering his head to meet your gaze. “It was foolish of me to imagine I might protect a mighty Dragon.”
Although he’d adopted a teasing tone, seriousness lit his gaze. You found you rather enjoyed it. Enjoyed him, against all better reason. The slightest of thrills went down your spine.
“Foolish, indeed,” you’d murmured.
In your mind though, you’d wondered if perhaps you were the foolish one.
Although the day had been nearly ten years ago, you had never forgotten it. Never forgotten the boy who’d wanted to protect a Dragon.
The answer to Jungkook’s question was a resounding yes.
Yes, you remembered. Perhaps too much.
“I remember some,” you said, fighting to keep your voice steady. “Not all.”
Jungkook paused. “I see.”
“If that is all, I shall –”
“We were to be married before,” he said, expression inscrutable. “Is the idea of marrying me now so repulsive?”
“I do not find you repulsive,” you said on instinct.
Too late, you realized you’d eliminated an answer. You did not find Jungkook repulsive, so your reason for declining was something else.
He considered this. “No?”
“I do not,” you admitted. “But I also don’t know you, Your Majesty. Our former betrothal ended nearly ten years ago. The intention was to mend a rift between two nations. The situation is different now. Now, we have a common enemy to unite us.”
“And once Mor is defeated?”
“The defeat of a mutual enemy will be enough.”
Jungkook gave you a look which plainly said, will it?
Growing increasingly frustrated, you stepped forward until you stood nose to nose. Tilting your chin higher, you fought the overwhelming tide of his cedar and sunshine.
“You asked if I remember our last meeting and I do,” you said hotly. “I also remember the carnage which followed. Do not ask from me more than I can give, Your Majesty.”
A shadow crossed Jungkook’s expression, quickly followed by anger.
“If you remember so well,” he said, eyes narrowed. “Then surely you remember it was my Kingdom, not yours which paid for the coup in blood. It took me many years to rebuild what my Uncle destroyed.”
“I did not mean –”
“I think you did,” he interrupted. Taking a step back, he allowed cool air to pass between you. Stiffly, he bowed. “Thank you for the evening, Your Majesty. Enjoy the remainder of your night.”
Turning around, Jungkook strode down the hall until he disappeared.
You remained still for a moment, staring after him and wondering what you had done. All you’d wanted to do was to steer the conversation away from your vow not to marry. Instead, you’d insulted a man who had done nothing to harm you – at one point, he’d even wanted to protect you.
Gathering your skirts, you turned and walked away. Yoongi had not waited for you, for which you were grateful. You had no doubt he’d side with King Jungkook regarding your display this evening. Anyone with half a brain would, you supposed.
Still, it was too much for Jungkook to expect you to marry him simply because you had once been engaged. You’d been right about one thing – the situation was different now. You were different now and could not afford to let Jungkook get any closer.
You’d witnessed firsthand the kind of disaster such unions wrought.
Climbing the steps to your chamber, the crown on your head felt heavier tonight than ever before.
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The sun had not yet risen when you left your bed the next morning. Donning a gown, you hastily braided your hair and slipped outside. Nodding hello to your guards, you hurried down the corridors and out a side door.
As the land of Dragons, Ashya had developed unique features attuned to their needs. One such accommodation were the sheds – tiny, low buildings with large yards beyond them. They rested on the opposite side of the stables, since horses tended to be spooked by dragons and the main purpose of the sheds was for Dragons to shift.
Entering the one closest, you shut the door and began to undress. Hanging your clothes on the wall, you strolled into the enclosed yard. Its walls were high enough to ensure no passersby saw, yet large enough to encompass an adult Dragon.
Inhaling a breath, you tipped your head back and let the shift come. Wings unfurling, you opened your eyes and set your forelegs upon the ground. Bending low to the dirt, you pushed yourself upwards and into the sky.
Soaring over the castle, you began to fly southeast of the city. Valor sprawled out beneath you, a haphazard city of cobblestone and flint. Smoke curled from the chimneys, the earliest households waking for the day.
To the east, the foothills of the Thadal mountains were covered in pasture. Sheep and goats grazed there; their wool favored by Ashyan merchants. Circling overhead to ensure all was well, you found yourself satisfied and began to climb higher.
This was one of your favorite pastimes. Flying high enough that even your Dragon’s breath froze in your lungs, crystallizing in bursts until you could no longer bear it. Then you dove, tucking your wings in to hurtle towards the ground.
At the last moment, you snapped your wings open and rode the wind.
Snorting a thin stream of smoke, you slowed as you approached the mountains. The first rays of dawn broke over the horizon, spilling their light between the rocky crags. Inhaling fresh morning air, you flew further south.
The Thadal range was truly one of the wonders of the continent. Flying between towering peaks, you did not question why the Dragon Wars had been fought for its riches. The mountains went on for miles in the east, a flight you’d only made once. It had taken you nearly a week to cross the entire range and at its end you’d found a desert similar in size to the Irik Sea.
When you had returned, your father had berated you. Your mother had died only a year prior and he had only recently managed to pull himself together. If you had died, he’d shouted, the entire future of Ashya was lost.
It was a heavy burden to bear, but one you’d shouldered after his passing. Everything you did was for your nation and people. You would be enough for Ashya and would guard against the kind of attachments which might put this at risk.
As the sun slowly rose, the tightness in your stomach increased. With the rising sun came the responsibilities of being Queen. You had a schedule to keep, meetings to attend with Duret Ghal, your advisors and a large group of nobles.
Tucking in your wing, you began to turn – only for bright, searing pain to hit you in the shoulder.
Crying out, you fought to keep stable while twisting around. Wings beating the air, you frantically searched for your attacker. Vision blurred, you scanned the tree lines below and found nothing.
A second bolt shot towards you. With great effort, you managed to dodge the strike, rolling in midair. Mid-twist, you realized a large iron bolt remained lodged in your shoulder.
Stomach curdling, you realized what danger you were in. Only Mor had crossbows strong enough to kill a Dragon. Somewhere beneath you lay a Mor patrol.
Searching the woods, you felt hot drops of blood dripping from your scales. Before you could retaliate, before you could so much as inhale, an arrow of darkness shot into your vision.
Jungkook, astride his dragon, Nemrys, laid waste to the mountain.
A great wave of fire engulfed where the Mor patrol had been. Faint screams rose from below, a final shot fired but its aim was way off, as though whomever had done so, did so out of panic.
Wings flapping, you tried to stay aloft, but to no avail. It was hard to bring down a Dragon with a single bolt, but Mor had perfected their technology over the past century and you’d been caught unawares.
Nemrys continued to torch the forest even as you dropped, struggling to stay alight. Vision turning black, you thought you heard Jungkook yell – or maybe it was your own subconscious – before you spiraled down, wings cutting through branches before you hit the ground.
Everything went dark after that.
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Groggily, you woke to the sound of your name being called.
Fabric had been draped over your torso, softer than the dirt beneath your back. As you opened an eye, you realized you’d shifted to human. This happened occasionally when you went through a great shock.
As soon as you thought this, you remembered the attack. When you attempted to sit upright, a gentle hand gripped your shoulder. Re-focusing through the haze, you realized it was Jungkook who knelt beside you.
His expression remained on your arm. A shudder of pain wracked your body, which had been covered by his cloak, you realized.
Except for your shoulder, that was.
Catching a glimpse of it on the ground, you winced and forced yourself to look away. The lower part of your arm remained unscathed, but the upper portion was in bad shape. All you could see was blood, shredded muscle, and bone peeking through.
“The arrow,” you breathed, head spinning. “Where is it?”
“Knocked loose when you landed,” Jungkook said, tight-lipped. “Which was lucky, given how large the bolt was. Had you shifted while it was still in your shoulder… I do not know what might have happened. Still…” He paused. “You have lost a lot of blood.”
Turning aside, Jungkook began rummaging through a pack on the ground. Dizzily, you glanced around the forest clearing.
“W-where is Nemrys?” you asked, your teeth chattering.
Jungkook looked back with alarm. “I left him in the clearing,” he said. “There was not enough room for him to land.”
“And this is… your cloak?”
Jungkook nodded but said nothing more. He was dressed in all leather, a broadsword strapped to his back in a pragmatic sheath. When he turned your wrist over, you let out a hiss and his gaze snapped to yours.
A war seemed to wage within him as Jungkook sat back on his heels. “You have lost a lot of blood,” he repeated.
“There are healers in Valor,” you said, struggling to sit up. “You must bring me to them.”
Jungkook gripped your good shoulder again. “You cannot shift in this state, and I fear moving you would aggravate the wound ever further.”
You glared at him from the ground. “What do you propose, then?”
Even as you spoke, it occurred to you the situation might be bad. Right now, shock and adrenaline kept the pain at bay, but it would soon wear off.
“I stopped the blood flow as best I could,” Jungkook said. “But it continues to bleed. I fear you may lose consciousness before we reach the capital.”
Panic rose, choking whatever retort you had to say. If you lost consciousness now, it would only be a matter of time before your organs began to fail. You could not die here. You would not; not on an unknown forest floor, miles away from your home.
You would not be brought down by a single Mor patrol before you even got the chance to face them on the battlefield.
“What are the options,” you said, returning to Jungkook. “Do you have a tourniquet with you? Can Nemrys cauterize my wound? I can survive the loss of a limb, Your Majesty, but I will not leave Ashya so poorly defended.”
Jungkook stared at you a moment before he slowly exhaled.
“There is another option,” he said at last.
“Whatever it is, you best do it quickly. Before I pass out and leave you to wrestle with your conscience alone.”
Suppressing a grimace, Jungkook finally nodded and rolled up his sleeves. It exposed sinuous forearms and ink which, in any other circumstance, you might have found appealing. As it was, you merely found them distracting.
Jungkook hesitated before laying his hands on your arm.
“You must…” He paused, then swallowed. “You must trust me, Y/N.”
The use of your first name was shocking enough for you to fall silent. Nodding, you stared at the sky and laid as still as you could. The pain had begun to set in; you could feel phantom tingles from your injured limb. Dull, shooting pain which throbbed in your shoulder.
At first, nothing happened.
Jungkook’s hands remained on your arm and for a moment, nothing changed. Then – a flurry of sparks skittered down his hands. They sank into your skin so quickly, you thought you’d imagined it.
In response to this, the pain flared, and you arched your back.
“Steady,” said Jungkook, calloused hands on your body. It could have been your imagination, but his dark eyes seemed to glow. “The pain will be gone soon.”
As he spoke, more and more sparks traveled down his forearms. They increased until a golden stream of light poured from his fingertips, fracturing into pieces and – healing you, you realized.
Each place the golden light touched, your muscles reknit. Blood flowed back to the wound as your skin stitched itself together. Shocked, you stared at the evidence of your wound being erased. A bead of sweat rolled down Jungkook’s brow, his color turning sallow while you stared in alarm.
“Jungkook,” you rasped, chest rising and falling. The steady stream of light continued to brighten. “Jungkook – enough.”
He inhaled and jerked back, severing the connection.
Still breathing heavily, you stared at him in shock. The forest around you seemed darker, as though it, too, missed the light. Missed the golden magic which had poured forth from his fingers.
Shakily, you pushed yourself to a seated position, one hand on his cloak to hold it in place. Glancing down, you saw your shoulder and went still. He had healed you. Somehow, Jungkook had healed you.
Experimentally, you flexed the muscles and watched the skin ripple, undeterred.
You’d heard of healing magic but never experienced it in person. Magic was rare enough for not all gifts to be born in the same lifetime. There was also the small matter of neither of Jungkook’s parents being Dragons. Only a human with a Dragon parent could inherit magical gifts.
“Explain,” you said, gaze lifting to him.
Jungkook blinked. “Excuse me?”
“Explain,” you repeated, not looking away. “How did you heal me?”
Finally understanding, Jungkook sat back on his heels. Twisting around, he rummaged in his pack for a canteen and unscrewed the cap. As he took a long sip, Jungkook stared at the forest.
His exhaustion was clear, and you felt a glimmer of regret at your words. Regret – and something else. Something warmer, which wrapped you in golden tendrils as easily as his magic.
Clutching the cloak, you stared and realized you were being unfair. First and foremost, he had saved your life. Everything else could wait.
“Thank you,” you said quietly.
Jungkook stilled.
“I do not know how, nor why you healed me,” you continued. “But… thank you for doing so.”
Setting down his canteen, Jungkook waited a moment before turning to face you. He seemed to wrestle with some inner emotion.
“You are welcome.” After another beat, he reached into his sack. “Here,” he said, pulling out a ball of clothes. “If you wish to change into my spare clothing, you may. I can wait over there.”
Once you accepted the bundle, Jungkook stood from the ground. Dusting his palms on his pants, he swayed a little before he steadied himself. Before you could comment on this he was gone, trekking across the clearing.
Silently, you unfolded the clothes in your lap.
They included a tunic and trousers, along with a leather belt to hold them in place. Scuffed boots made up the last item of the pile. Running a thumb up their side, you attempted to determine their make.
“Why do you have all this?” you asked, looking up.
Even from here, you could see Jungkook’s cheeks redden. “Nemrys and I were once trapped by a snowstorm. We were forced to camp for the night in the mountains. Ever since then, I’ve always carried supplies. Get dressed,” he said, turning around. “I promise not to look.”
Tough you bristled, you watched and true to his word, he did not turn around. Once you were certain of this, you stood from the ground and began to dress yourself. His tunic was much too large, as were the trousers, forcing you to tighten the belt to its final notch. The fabric was soft and warm though, smelling of him.
Again, you marveled at your ease of motion. You’d seen your shoulder before Jungkook had done his healing and knew the situation could have been worse. If you hadn’t bled out in the woods, you might have lost the limb. Even in older accounts of magical healing, you knew it could be dangerous work. Healing required knowledge of muscles, veins, ligaments, and nerve endings. It was simple to patch up skin – harder to make everything beneath it work again.
Whatever magic Jungkook had, it was powerful.
Once you were fully dressed, you approached him on the other side of the clearing. Jungkook continued to stare pointedly at the woods, only turning around when you tapped his shoulder. He swiftly took in your outfit, gaze darkening at the sight of his clothes on your frame.
Ignoring the possible meanings his look could contain, you cleared your throat.
Jungkook’s gaze jumped to yours. “Are you ready to go?” he said, a bit brusque. “Nemrys is willing to fly us both back.”
Your jaw fell a little. “You wish for me to ride a dragon?”
“I expect you not to undo the gift I gave. Although I fixed your shoulder the best I could, I’d prefer a healer examined you back in Valor. It would be bad,” Jungkook added, seeing your expression, “if the Queen of Ashya were to plummet from the sky after my attempted healing.”
Much as you hated to admit it, he had a point. Magic was tenuous – even you knew how complicated healing magic was.
“Fine,” you muttered. “I will ride back with you.”
When you moved to walk past him, Jungkook grabbed your arm. Bristling somewhat, you stared at his hand on your sleeve.
“What?” you huffed, looking upwards.
Jungkook met your gaze. “Before we go,” he said slowly. “There are things you should know. Things we need to discuss.”
“Such as?”
“Such as my magic,” he said, releasing your arm. “My magic, where it comes from, and what it means for Ashya.”
You stared at him, not understanding.
Jungkook exhaled and ran a hand through his hair. Dark strands fell around his face, partially concealing the worry in his gaze. Of what, or for whom, you did not know.
“Do you know the origin story of magic?”
His voice had deepened, softened a little. Something about this and his expression convinced you not to snap back. Every child on the continent knew the origin story.
“Of course,” you said curiously. “Natal ripped a hole in the veil and before she could close it, magic seeped through.”
“True.” Jungkook nodded. “In your version of the story though, only your kind were gifted with magic. This is not the case. All dragons have magic.”
The world around you seemed to tilt. What Jungkook said was impossible and yet, he seemed utterly serious. For a moment, you wondered if he’d also been hurt in the attack. Perhaps he’d hit his head in his haste to heal you.
“You are the only kind of dragon who can shapeshift,” he continued. “Other kinds of magic exist, though. There are other types of power the dragons can wield.”
“Impossible,” you whispered, finally finding your voice.
“It is true.” Jungkook’s gaze remained level. “Riders can use the magic of the dragon they’re bonded to. It is why I can heal. Nemrys comes from a long line of dragons with healing magic.”
“It cannot be,” you said, reeling from the implications. “Only the descendants of Dragons and humans are born with magic.”
“And riders, once they bond.”
You stared at him a moment, then shook your head. “We would have known. We would… we would have known if someone else could use magic. How could we not?” you demanded.
A shadow of something bitter crossed Jungkook’s expression. “I am sure you are aware there are parts of Duret Ghal which disapprove of magic.”
You did not know how this could relate to the dragons and their riders but allowed the detour to continue. It could not be worse than the sudden revelation magic was different from what you’d always imagined.
“I am aware,” you said flatly. “A ridiculous notion. Magic wins wars.”
“True.” Jungkook seemed to weigh his words. “But those born with gifts are viewed as a necessary evil by some within Duret Ghal. A tool for battle and nothing more. If these people had discovered their leaders had magic?” Jungkook shook his head. “A century ago, Ghalians would have revolted.”
Your eyes narrowed. “They would accept you ride dragons, but not that you have magic?”
A ghost of a smile crossed Jungkook’s lips.
“Humans are gifted magic when a Dragon and human mate,” he explained. “For many years, Duret Ghal considered Ashya and Dragons to be our enemy. You can understand why the idea of magic was an inherent threat.”
“…I suppose.”
“They only accepted the riders because Ghalians imagined the same thing you did – that the dragons we ride are a tame, subservient species compared to your own. It is not so.”
Unable to fathom this, you looked away at the forest. If everything Jungkook said was true, then the history of your nation – of your continent – was a lie. The Dragons of Ashya were only different in that they could shapeshift. The rhetoric you’d believed your whole life, that you were somehow more than the rest, was untrue.
The dragon riders had magic and, realizing this, you turned back.
“Why did you heal me, then?” you asked. “If the Ghalians feel so strongly about magic, surely you would wish to keep this a secret?”
Jungkook hesitated.
“We were… aware of the risk coming here. For many years, I have been trying to convince the other riders to reveal themselves,” he explained. “It was the coming war against Mor which convinced them, in the end.”
“What does Mor have to do with it?”
“Everything,” Jungkook said. “Mor has declared a war on all dragons, including those of Duret Ghal. Their technology is beyond ours. When they do come, it will be a bloody battle. If we do not fight with our full capabilities, we might fail. I will not allow this to happen.”
“And so,” you said slowly. “You healed me because… you had already decided to reveal your magic?”
An amused gleam entered his gaze. “Amongst other reasons,” Jungkook allowed. “Though you may not believe it, I rather enjoy having you around, Your Majesty. It would be a pity to waste a life such as yours.”
There seemed to be deeper meaning to his words, but you had no time to dissect it. Stepping closer, Jungkook looked down.
“We had planned to reveal our magic once the treaty was signed,” he explained. “Your injury simply moved up the timeline.”
“I see,” you said, somewhat dazed by his presence so close to your own.
Jungkook nodded, then turned to continue, but something within you kept you from moving. Staring at the back of his head, you realized the words you truly wanted to say.
“And the other dragons,” you said slowly, then stopped. “What about them?”
Paused at the edge of the clearing, Jungkook turned around. Wariness had entered his gaze.
“I do not know this is my story to tell,” he admitted. “But since you cannot speak directly to Nemrys, I can tell you what he told me.”
Jungkook glanced overhead and you wondered if he searched for the time. Or, you realized, he could be communicating with Nemrys.
You had known rider and dragon had a bond. This had been well-documented throughout history, but not much else was known beyond their ritualistic ceremony. Whether dragon and rider could converse was a controversial topic amongst historians, but based on what Jungkook said, it seemed they could.
Based on what he did now, it seemed they did.
“Thousands of years ago,” Jungkook finally said, looking down. “Natal broke the sky and magic flowed in. It entered all dragons who slept in the mountains below. The magic manifested in different forms. A line of dragons known for compassion became healers. Another line, known for passion and wildness, became stormmakers. And another, always curious, became the shapeshifters.
“Human beings were originally from the south, but as they moved north, they encountered the dragons. Wars were fought between them, bloodier than any of our recent conflicts. Many were killed on both sides, until the head of the shifter dragons decided to become human.
“There was dissent amongst the dragons as to whether this was wise. Many did not like the idea of stooping to the humans’ level, but the shifter line proceeded despite their caution. Your kind founded Ashya and lived in peace for a while.
“Over time, changes took place. Small, at first – and then larger. Some of the shifters chose not to shift, even though they could. Some decided they preferred human form over dragon. In an important conflict, the shifters sided with humans. Certain lines of dragons deemed this to be unacceptable.
“The most feared magic amongst dragons was – and still is – that of the memory dragons. These dragons, though rare, can manipulate thought, memory and perception. As punishment for siding with the humans, they took away your memory of all dragons. Stole your ability to communicate while in dragon form. Over time, your kind have forgotten what you once were.
“It was a terrible punishment. One which has not been given since. That is the whole truth,” he finished quietly. “That is the knowledge which has been kept from your kind.”
Falling silent, Jungkook allowed time for his story to sink in. The forest around you was silent as well, as though it, too, were holding its breath.
You could only stare while struggling to comprehend. If what Jungkook said was true, then you were not different from other dragons – or, you were, but not in the ways you’d once thought. They were as intelligent, as cohesive, and knowledgeable as you were. More, perhaps, if they had hidden this from you for so long.
“And so, rider magic,” you said, a bit hoarse. “How…?”
“Ah.” Jungkook gave a wry smile. “The riders did not come until later. Call it Natal’s judgement, if you will. As time went on, some of the dragon lines grew more curious about humans. One of them somehow bonded with a human. This continued to occur until finally, the King of Duret Ghal himself became a dragon rider.”
“And the riders,” you said, trying to piece it together. “They can use their dragon’s magic?”
Jungkook nodded.
“And you speak to them?” The barest hint of wonder entered your voice. “Can you speak to all dragons?”
“Only the one we are bonded to,” Jungkook said, a bit softer.
“I see.”
He gave you a look. “I know this is a lot to take in.”
“No. Well, yes,” you said as you shook your head. “You have given me much to think on, Your Majesty.”
Jungkook’s expression shuttered a bit at the formality, but he inclined his head. “Indeed, Your Majesty,” he responded.
You stared at him for a moment, taking in the dried sweat on his forehead from the energy spent healing you. Something had changed between you, and you did not know how you could turn back.
“Thank you,” you said softly.
Jungkook glanced up. “For what?”
“For many things, I suppose. For healing me. For trusting me with the truth. I owe you a life debt, Your Majesty.”
An unreadable look passed over his face. “I imagine there will be many life debts between us before this war comes to pass.”
He was not wrong and for a moment, you allowed yourself the luxury of imagining you might face this war together.
“A fair point,” you allowed.
Glancing past him, you surveyed the clearing. Nemrys must be nearby, or Jungkook would not have gotten to you so quickly. Suddenly, the prospect of meeting another dragon held an entirely different meaning. All this time, you had assumed them to be less intelligent than your own and had treated them as such. You could only imagine how little they thought of you.
Nemrys would likely be less thrilled to have you riding him, than you would be in the saddle.
“There is another reason I healed you,” Jungkook admitted.
You glanced his way in surprise. “And what reason was that?”
Jungkook walked closer, step by step until he was barely a foot away. Reaching out a hand, he adjusted his tunic where it fell on your frame. His thumb brushed your bare collarbone and in response to this, you barely suppressed a shiver.
“You said you did not know me.” Jungkook swallowed. “It seemed a shame for our time to be cut short before I could remedy this fact.”
With that, he dropped his hand and walked away.
You stared as he left, feeling utterly thrown until he spoke again.
“Follow me,” Jungkook called. “Nemrys is impatient. Not unusual for a dragon, but he does make a good point. People will be looking for us – I was expected back nearly an hour ago.”
Glancing overhead, you realized Jungkook was right based on the sun's position. It had risen nearly above the treetops, meaning Jimin would have people looking for you soon.
Jungkook kept going as you followed, striding from the clearing you’d made when you fell. It took only a few minutes before the trees had thinned enough for you to come face to face with Nemrys on the ground.
His scales were ebony in color, dark as the night sky above during the witching hour. Only one golden eye could focus on you at a time, but the one which did remained steady as you entered.
Nemrys did not seem happy to see you, and you did not blame him. Dragons were a territorial bunch, whether shifter or otherwise. If Nemrys considered you a threat to Jungkook, he would stop at nothing to protect his rider.
As you exited the forest, Jungkook looked up. “No,” he said sharply, walking around Nemrys’ side.
Curious, you turned and realized he wasn’t speaking to you.
“What did Nemrys say?” 
A growl left Nemrys’ throat, clawing at the ground with a single, curved talon.
Jungkook sighed in response, looking skyward. He seemed thoroughly exasperated, and it was one of the most natural expressions you’d seen on him thus far.
“Nemrys asked if you wished to ride in the saddle, or have him carry you,” Jungkook said at last, looking down.
Gaze narrowed, you turned your head to Nemrys. If you did not know any better, you could have sworn his upper lip curled. To be carried by a dragon meant to dangle upside down from their claw while they flew through the air.
“No, thank you,” you said, walking closer. “Although, I do have something I wish to say to Nemrys.”
Coming to a stop before him, you looked Nemrys in the eye. Nemrys slowly blinked, as though he were extremely uninterested in whatever you had to say.
“Thank you,” you said, your voice softening. “Thank you… for telling me, through him.”
Nemrys stilled.
“And for healing me,” you added, bowing your head. It was a sign of great trust to expose your neck to a dragon. “I cannot find the words to express my gratitude.”
After a moment, Nemrys exhaled and lowered his head as well. Glancing up, you met his gaze and felt something unspoken pass between you.
“He thinks you might find the saddle more comfortable,” Jungkook said, sounding a bit amused at the side.
Lips twitching, you took a step backwards and looked now at Jungkook. Nemrys snorted again, steam exhaled past his lips. In response to whatever he’d said, Jungkook’s cheeks turned a bit pink.
“What was that?” you asked, curious.
“Nothing.” Jungkook glared at the dragon. “Nemrys said we should go.”
Nemrys snorted once more, steam rising as he hauled himself to his feet. It did not seem Jungkook was telling you the entire truth, but the importance of this faded when you saw the saddle. It had not seemed as high when you were also a dragon.
“You sit up… there?” you asked, coming to a stop.
Jungkook hid his smile. “It isn’t as dangerous as it seems,” he insisted, placing a hand on the ladder. “You just climb all the rungs until you reach the top.”
Nodding, you placed one foot in the stirrup and firmly gripped the ladder. As you began to climb, hand over foot, you found yourself holding your breath. Eventually, you reached the top and swung a leg over.
“Careful,” Jungkook called from the ground. “I still want my healer to take a look at your shoulder.”
“I have healers, too,” you grumbled, settling onto the leather.
Jungkook climbed after you, swinging his leg over to land firmly behind you. His right hand found your waist, tugging you back until your spine met his chest. None other would dare touch the Queen in such a manner but then again, Jungkook was also a King.
“I know,” he said, his breath warm on your ear. “But mine are accustomed to dealing with magical healing.”
Unable to argue, you gripped the front of the saddle. Unconvincingly, you tried to make yourself believe it would be like riding a horse. Jungkook’s hand gripped your hip, distracting enough that you nearly forgot what you were doing.
As Nemrys bent and spread his wings, you forced your eyes shut. It was a silly thing, but you’d never flown through the skies when you were not the one in control.
You felt, rather than saw, when the ground fell away beneath you. Wind whistled past your ears, the force of gravity pressing you against Jungkook’s chest. He said nothing in response, merely curled his fingers into the hem of your tunic.
One you felt comfortable, you opened your eyes against the rushing wind.
For a moment, vertigo overtook you and you felt a bit nauseous. It felt wrong to fly in your human body, with nothing protecting you if you were to fall. The feeling only lasted a moment though, before you began to marvel at the landscape beneath you.
It looked different with your human vision – as a dragon, you could see UV as well as blue, red and green. Vision as a human was softer, the mountains before you a muted grey-green. Even the air felt colder without your dragon skin.
Unbidden, you shivered, and Jungkook’s hand tightened.
“It is different,” you breathed, staring hard at the ground.
Jungkook chuckled, low in your ear. “Different for me, too,” he admitted. “I have never flown with another person before.”
Startled, you turned and found his face close to yours. You had not thought about this when you moved, but now found yourself inches away from his lips.
“Never?” you murmured, your words caught by the wind.
Again, the same shiver swept your spine, so you forced yourself to face forward. The wind continued to blow, ferocious and cold, but Jungkook managed to stay warm behind you. Eyes drifting shut, you allowed yourself a moment to bask in his presence.
Only a moment before you pulled yourself together.
All too soon, you arrived at the castle courtyard. Landing in the open space by the gates, you realized a search party had already gathered. Sliding down from Nemrys, you barely paused to give thanks before hurrying on.
Midway to the castle, you saw Jimin break ranks as he jogged to see you. Scanning your frame, his silver-blonde hair blew haphazardly in the wind. Coming to a sudden stop, Jimin glanced past you, his eyes widening when he realized you’d come from Nemrys.
Before he could speak, Namjoon skidded to a stop beside him.
“Y/N,” he gasped, lowering both hands to his knees. “By the veil, you scared us.”
Guiltily, you turned. “I am sorry,” you told him. “I am fine, though. I promise. I apologize for making you worry.”
Jimin continued to stare at Nemrys. “Your Majesty. What –”
“It was my fault,” Jungkook interrupted, striding into the circle. He came to a stop alongside you, as though he belonged there. “I saw Her Majesty injure herself while out flying and insisted on escorting her back to the castle.”
Namjoon looked at you in alarm. “Is this true? Are you hurt?”
“Only a dislocation,” you assured him. “Nothing to worry about.”
Although Namjoon nodded, Jimin continued to frown.
“A dislocation,” he said slowly, his gaze flicking to yours. “While flying?”
“Momentarily blinded by the sun,” you explained. “Hit a cliff and was forced to shift back to human.”
“And… Jungkook saw?”
Both Jimin and Namjoon glanced at Jungkook, who jumped into the story without missing a beat.
“Nemrys has excellent vision,” he said with a shrug. “Better than I, that is for certain.”
Jimin still seemed suspicious, but he eventually nodded. “We are glad to see you safe, Your Majesty,” he said. “I will go and tell the search party to stand down.”
“Thank you,” you said quietly.
Jimin began crossing the courtyard, leaving you alone with Namjoon and Jungkook. You fully intended to tell Namjoon and Jimin the truth, but now was not the right moment. Too many ears were listening.
“Is Yoongi furious?” you asked lowly. “How many meetings have I missed?”
Namjoon gave a rueful smile. “He will get over it. Your meetings for the morning have been postponed. The afternoon remains.”
“Good,” you said, stepping forward. “I will just –”
“Your Majesty,” Jungkook said, and you paused. “I did hope you would see the healer on my staff before returning to duty.”
He stood to your side, looking at you earnestly. Namjoon glanced between you; his surprise further increasing when you eventually nodded.
“His Majesty is correct,” you admitted. “I do feel fine, Namjoon, but it is better to be safe than sorry. I will have things to discuss with you after.”
Namjoon slowly nodded, seeming to understand. “Anything I need to know now?”
Glancing around, you ensured no one could hear. “A Mor patrol,” you said quietly. “Barely fifteen miles south. They were the true cause of my injury, but they are no longer a worry.”
Namjoon’s brow creased even further. “Are you certain you are alright? If it was a Mor patrol, you may have–”
“I am fine,” you cut in, quiet.
Namjoon hesitated before he nodded again. “Alright. I will have Jimin send soldiers to search the surrounding mountains.”
“Thank you. Tell Yoongi I will be up as soon as I can. And have Amara send me new clothes,” you added as you walked past. “I believe it sends the wrong message to wander around in His Majesty’s leathers.”
Namjoon nearly choked on his response while turning to leave.
“Well?” You glanced sideways, at Jungkook. “What are we waiting for?”
Turning his laugh into a cough, Jungkook began to walk forward. “Nothing,” he said.
Following his footsteps, you realized he went towards the guest entrance of the castle. Jungkook had not landed near the sheds, which made sense. Dragons and riders did not take kindly to one another. You supposed you and Nemrys now made the exception.
As you entered the halls of the castle, a draft brushed your exposed skin and you shivered. Pulling Jungkook’s clothes tighter, you considered the excuse he’d fed to Jimin.
“You said Nemrys saw me from the sky,” you said, breaking the silence.
Jungkook looked your way in surprise. “Should I have said something different? You did not seem inclined to discuss your injury out there.”
“No, you are correct. However, I now find myself wondering how did you see me this morning? Did you follow me from the castle, Your Majesty?”
Coming to a halt at the next corner, Jungkook turned sideways to face you.
His gaze flickered in torchlight. “Are you accusing me of following you?”
"Merely asking.”
Jungkook’s eyes narrowed. “If you must know, I was also out for my morning ride. I saw a Mor scout and had tracked them back to that mountain when I saw you get shot.”
“How very convenient,” you said, lifting your chin.
A muscle in his jaw ticked, stepping closer. “Is it?” he murmured. “I find it tiresome to have my honor continually called into question, Your Majesty.”
“Can you blame me?” you said. “You have kept many secrets from me, it would seem. Some are more substantial than others.”
“I also saved your life.”
“A debt I am well-aware of.”
A door creaked open down the hall.
“Oh – I am sorry,” a chestnut-haired man said, peeking out. “I heard arguing and wanted to make sure no one needed my help. Carry on!”
The man was about to duck back inside, when Jungkook held up a hand.
“Wait, Hoseok,” he said, not looking away from your gaze. “I need you to do something for me.”
The man – Hoseok, it seemed – paused halfway across the threshold. His gaze slid to yours, clearly recognizing you for who you were.
“Are you sure?” he asked slowly.
Jungkook nodded, turning on his heel as he strode down the hall. You were left with no choice but to follow, glaring daggers at his retreating backside. Something about the King made your blood boil, making you see red as you traveled in his footsteps.
“This is my healer, Jung Hoseok,” Jungkook said, coming to a stop. “Hoseok, this is the Queen of Ashya. I would appreciate it if you looked at her shoulder.”
Hoseok hesitated, glancing past Jungkook to you. After a moment, he nodded and stepped inside. 
“Of course,” he said with a bow. “Please, come in.”
Inclining your head, you walked past Jungkook to enter. The space past him was tidy, though there was not much light to see by, aside from the fireplace. Possibly the room had belonged to an Ashyan healer, although you could not be certain. You rarely traveled into the guest wing.
Once Jungkook had joined you, Hoseok crossed the room to pull open a cabinet. Rummaging around, he set several jars on the counter.
Jungkook lingered by the door, leaning a shoulder to the wall to stare at the healer.
Deciding the best thing to do was ignore him, you glanced away. One minute the King was tender, binding your wounds with the utmost of care and the next, he seemed ready to bite your head off. It was maddening.
Glancing around, you took in herbs, linen, and jars of salve. On the hearth was a fire, crackling merrily beneath a large, copper pot. The scents of witch hazel and thyme filled the room, a natural antiseptic.
“Hoseok is the best healer in Duret Ghal,” Jungkook said, by way of introduction.
Hoseok snorted. “I do not know about that,” he said as he turned around.
“Careful.” Jungkook arched a brow. “Her Majesty may take you at your word and see an Ashyan healer instead.”
Hoseok made an unbecoming sound before he looked up, stricken. “I did not mean insult, Your Majesty,” he said, a bit panicked. “It is only –”
“It is alright,” you interrupted. “None of my healers are accustomed to wounds healed by magic. I would prefer you look at my wound, regardless of what you have to say about Ashya.”
Hoseok shot Jungkook a surprised glance, who nodded.
“The Queen’s wounds were severe,” Jungkook said quietly. “An iron bolt to the shoulder while in dragon form. She crashed through the forest and shifted on impact. Had lost a lot of blood when I arrived.”
“I see.” Hoseok glanced your way, sympathetic. “I am so sorry to hear it, Your Majesty.”
With anyone else, you might have thought the words sounded patronizing, but not with Hoseok. He had an earnest way about him; you imagined he couldn’t tell a lie to save his soul.
“I would not care to repeat the experience,” you admitted.
Briskly, Hoseok scanned your body. “Left shoulder?”
Surprised, you said, “Yes.”
He nodded, rolling up his sleeves to walk around the table. An empty jar stayed behind on the counter, the flames from the hearth casting flickering light on the floor.
Hoseok stopped. “In order to evaluate your arm, I will need you to remove the tunic, Your Majesty. Is this alright?”
You nodded, then glanced at Jungkook.
Cheeks a bit pink, he seemed to take the hint. “I will take my leave,” Jungkook said, his hand fumbling for the door. “Should you have further need of me, Your Majesty, you may send Hoseok to find me.”
“Which might be rather difficult,” Hoseok observed. “Given Hoseok is currently tending to Her Majesty’s injury.”
Jungkook rolled his eyes but hid a smile as he left. The door fell shut behind him, leaving you and Hoseok in total silence. With a rueful smile, he glanced your way.
“Apologies,” he said with a shrug. “Jungkook and I grew up together, so we tend to forget our formalities when others are present.”
“We?” you said, arching a brow. “It seemed you were the only one forgetting your manners, healer Jung.”
Hoseok’s eyes widened, unsure how to respond until you laughed.
“I am sorry,” you said with a smile. “It is cruel to tease when you do not know my nature.”
Hoseok paused before throwing his head back to laugh. Eyes shining, he wagged a finger in your direction as he walked away. “You are funny,” he said, pulling out a bowl. “It is no wonder the King seems to enjoy your company.”
“Is that so?”
Hoseok seemed not to hear your question, selecting some linen to lay on the counter. “There is a partition in the corner,” he said, nodding towards it. “Fabric is laid on the stool, so you can wrap it around your midsection for modesty.”
The partition was barely more than a folding screen, but it did the trick. Stripping free from Jungkook’s tunic, you folded it neatly and placed it on the stool. Winding the fabric around your breasts, you covered them tightly and stepped outside.
Glancing up as you exited, Hoseok set down his work. “You may sit on the stool,” he instructed. “That will do for the examination.”
Taking a seat, you waited for Hoseok to come around the counter. Gently, he took your wrist and turned it this way and that. Raising your arm, he examined its mobility until he seemed satisfied. Deft fingers moved up your arm, applying gentle pressure to several key points. When you failed to react, he prodded deeper.
Aside from the occasional twinge, you felt nothing unusual. After a while, Hoseok took a step back and nodded approval.
“Jungkook did a good job,” he said as he turned away.
“Is that all?”
“Not quite.” Hoseok stepped behind his table. “I will make you a salve, Your Majesty. This will ease any stiffness you may feel from the magical healing. Magic requires a great deal of energy, some of it yours. You may feel more tired than usual.”
“Oh,” you said, a bit thrown.
You had never questioned the toll of magic before. Yoongi had never complained about using his gift to help your council.
Pulling things from his cabinets, Hoseok began to mix and measure in a bowl. He was quiet for a while, content to do his work while you watched. After a while, he cleared his throat.
“I imagine it was a shock,” he said. “To be healed in such a manner.”
You stared at him a moment, unsure how to respond.
“It was… unexpected.”
Hoseok laughed as he looked up. “That is one way to put it,” he agreed. “The first time Jungkook healed me, I screamed like the veil was being torn apart. Thought he was trying to hex me.”
“Is such a thing even possible?” you said, smiling despite yourself.
Hoseok shrugged. “It seemed as likely as a rider having magic. I am sure Jungkook told you, but most in Duret Ghal are unaware of that particular secret.”
Silent, you nodded. Jungkook had, indeed, explained to you the image of magic in his homeland.
After a moment, Hoseok sighed. “The perceptions of Ghalians have changed greatly since the end of the Dragon Wars, but some of the fear remains. There are some who, no matter what we say, will believe magic and all Dragons are evil.”
“Not those His Majesty rides, though?”
Hoseok gave you a wry smile. “They do not view those dragons as the intelligent creatures you and I know them to be. Jungkook wishes to change that,” he said. “But it will be a difficult path. One he is determined to set upon.”
“I see.” You paused. “Forgive me for being blunt, but why are you telling me this?”
Hoseok resumed making the salve. “When Jungkook first revealed his magic to me, I was upset. He had lied. Kept something important from me for such a long time. It took me a while to understand that he, himself, did not always view his magic to be a gift.”
You stared at Hoseok a moment. 
Jungkook had seemed so confident when he healed you, and had always seemed different from the Ghalians who despised magic and Dragons. It had not occurred to you his reasons for keeping his magic a secret may have also been personal.
Hoseok was right. Changing perception within Duret Ghal would be difficult. Jungkook had taken a great risk by revealing his magic to you. A risk you did not wish to examine too closely for the moment.
“Is the examination finished?” you asked, rising from the stool.
Hoseok looked up in surprise. “Oh, yes. Feel free to get dressed, Your Majesty. I will finish this salve and send you on your way.”
You nodded and retreated behind the partition. Once you were no longer visible, you allowed yourself to fully breathe. Hoseok’s words painted a different picture of the Ghalian King. Magic had always been viewed as a gift in Ashya; you should have recognized the stigma elsewhere.
Unwinding the fabric from your torso, you returned to Jungkook’s clothing. His scent was everywhere, enveloping you fully.
It made you remember the ride with him on Nemrys, his body warm and solid behind you. Closing your eyes, you pushed this memory from mind. More and more, you found yourself considering Jungkook as a man instead of your enemy, and such thoughts were dangerous.
Fastening the belt, you stepped outside and found Hoseok waiting.
“Here,” he said, handing over a jar of salve. “If you need more, please send word and I shall bring it immediately.”
“You are too kind,” you said, accepting the bottle. “I appreciate your help, healer Jung.”
“Hoseok,” you agreed with a nod.
Not wishing to overstay the welcome, you gave him a last smile and walked towards the door. One hand on the knob, you paused.
Hoseok looked up at your silence. “Yes?”
A thousand questions sprang to mind – silly, inane ones of no use to anyone. What Jungkook had been like as a child, why he’d once needed to heal Hoseok and reveal his magic. You found yourself wanting to know more, wanting to know him and again, this was dangerous.
“Nothing,” you said, pulling open the door. “Thank you again for your services.”
Hoseok nodded and smiled as you left the room. Amara was waiting for you in the hall, a fresh bundle of clothes in her arms.
“Thank Natal,” you sighed, taking the dress. “It would have caused a lot of talk had I worn the King’s clothing upstairs.”
Hiding her grin, Amara followed you inside the empty room across the corridor. Once the door was shut, she began to help you dress.
“Did you fall in a pond?” she asked innocently, tugging on your laces.
You winced while lifted your arms. “Nothing so exciting. I was caught unawares during my flight and needed to shift. My morning dress is still in the sheds, unfortunately.”
Amara nodded, finishing the final button as you turned around. “I will get it,” she said, gathering Jungkook’s clothes and the salve to exit the room.
Left alone with your thoughts, you hesitated a moment before following suit.
Jungkook had not waited for you.
You were not sure why this mattered. It didn’t – it should not and yet, you couldn’t stop the sinking feeling it somehow did. Shoving the feeling aside, you managed to seem unruffled by the time you reached your first meeting.
The day only grew longer from there.
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When people imagined the duties of the crown, they typically thought of the more extraordinary parts. Being coronated, going to war, grand marshalling parades and the like.
The reality of ruling was far less glamorous. It was one tedious decision after another, with the most minute turn of phrase sparking ire or admiration. It was sitting through meeting after meeting while you listened to weather reports, updates from mines and concerns about a two and a half percent tariff still being too high.
By the time your meetings ended, the sun had long since sunk below the horizon. Wearily, you returned to your rooms and tried to forget the day. It did not seem possible only this morning, you’d feared for your life while bleeding out in the forest.
The only thing which drove you on was the thought of shutting yourself in your chambers, sinking into a bath and closing your eyes. A wish which seemed destined to be thwarted, you saw when you entered.
Min Yoongi had seated himself in an armchair by the fire, his expression steeled like a weapon of war.
“We need to talk,” he said simply.
Coming to a stop at the table, you inspected the salve Hoseok had made. He had not given any instructions on how to apply it, and you wondered if you should have Amara find out.
“Do we?” you said, lifting your gaze to his. “Need I remind you who amongst us wears the crown, Lord Yoongi?”
“And need I remind you which of us pays the other for their counsel?”
Hiding a smile, you pulled out a chair. As much as Ashya’s stability depended on your authority, you were not above thinking yourself impervious to counsel. If Yoongi had something he wished to speak to you about, it was likely important.
“Shall I guess what this is about?” you asked. “Or, are you going to eventually tell me?”
Yoongi did not waste your time. “What happened this morning?”
“I was injured during a flight.”
He made a noise of dismissal. “Are you truly telling me the Queen of Ashya was injured on a routine flight? That you spotted a Mor patrol and became so distracted, you crashed into a mountainside and dislocated your shoulder? Again,” he said, gaze hardening. “What happened?”
Slowly, you exhaled. “The truth is far less believable.”
“Try me.”
And so, you explained. Everything. Your flight this morning, the Mor patrol which had shot you down from the sky. The way you shifted to human before Jungkook arrived to heal you. You told Yoongi about Jungkook having magic, as did all riders. You explained about the different dragon lines, how they all had magic and were not unintelligent, as you had previously assumed.
Once you had finished, Yoongi stared at you and blinked. “That…” He shook his head. “Is equally insane, but at least you are now telling me the truth.”
He had questions then – many of them, and you soon settled into a familiar rhythm. Planning for different eventualities, laying out who to tell and when. Yoongi, along with Namjoon, were your sounding boards for strategy. When you’d given all the answers you could possibly provide, Yoongi fell silent, staring into the fire.
At last, he stood and walked towards the window. Pouring whiskey from a crystal decanter, he swirled this in one hand before he returned.
“This will change things,” Yoongi said, taking a sip of his drink.
“It will.”
“If what you say is true,” he said slowly. “We have acquired an entire new arsenal against Mor. Who knows what kinds of magic lie within their rider ranks? There has not been a healer born for many decades in Ashya.”
“Some of them will be passive powers,” you warned.
Yoongi waved a hand. “It is still a gift. Still magic. In all Jimin’s plans, he has only accounted for the gifts of humans between us. That number will now double! Triple, even.”
“His Majesty only revealed his magic to me because he was forced,” you countered. “We cannot count on them in upcoming battles with Mor. He could still decide otherwise.”
Yoongi gave you a look. “He said he was planning to reveal it after the treaty was signed, yes?”
“Yes, but –”
“But what, Your Majesty?” Yoongi’s eyes narrowed. “What reason do you have now not to trust the King? What lie could you possibly have prepared for me this evening?”
Freezing in place, you could only stare. Yoongi seldom spoke to you like this. For one, you were his Queen and for another, he usually understood you better than to yell.
After a moment, Yoongi sighed and shoved a hand through his hair. He looked tired, you realized. Hoseok’s words from earlier came to mind, about how magic required new energy. You wondered how much Yoongi had used his gift these past few weeks.
“I am sorry,” Yoongi said, and looked as though he meant it. “I did not mean to sound so harsh.”
Choosing not to respond, you waited instead for him to elaborate. Yoongi rarely said things without meaning them.
Closing his eyes, the dark of his lashes dusted paler cheekbones. The veins in his eyelids were prominent, stark against the rest of his skin.
“It can be exhausting to have a gift like mine,” Yoongi said quietly. “All day, I can sense other people’s emotions, yet cannot shut them out. It can be useful, but it is also tiresome. Oftentimes, I am not sure which emotions are mine. It is especially trying,” he said, eyes opening, “when someone continuously lies in my presence.”
“Me?” you said, taken aback. “When have I lied to you, Yoongi?”
Yoongi stared into his glass for a moment, seemingly weighing the consequences of whatever it was he had to say.
“Each time you say you do not wish to marry the King.”
You went still, staring at him from across the table. Within the confines of your chest, your heart began to beat faster.
“I do not mean you are lying on purpose,” Yoongi said, then paused. “Or maybe you are. It can be hard for me to tell. All I know is your emotions are murky each time you speak, as though you are battling something inside.”
“You think… I desire to marry His Majesty?”
Yoongi considered for a minute. “I do not know,” he admitted.
“And yet, you presume to know a great deal,” you said, drumming your fingers on the table. “Why would I turn the King down if I wished to marry him?”
“I am sure I could not say.”
“Hazard a guess.”
Yoongi’s eyes narrowed. “Fine.” He took a long sip of his drink. “When you are around Jungkook, your emotions get lighter. Happier. And yet, there is sorrow as well. I do not know if this is because of His Majesty, or the idea of marriage itself.”
Staring at Yoongi, you refused to move. He was dangerously close to hitting upon something important. Something you’d worked tirelessly to hide, even from yourself.
“Is it Leo?” Yoongi asked, a bit gentler. “Do you still love him?”
Yoongi had not served with you in the army, but he knew about your former love. Early on in your reign, you’d asked Yoongi to go about certain steps to protect Leo from harm.
“No,” you exhaled. “It has been a long time since I chose my path, and he chose his.”
“Pride, then. Perhaps you do not like the idea of ruling beside someone else.”
“It is not that,” you muttered.
“Hm.” Yoongi tilted his head. “That is the truth.”
“Stop doing that,” you said with a roll of your eyes.
“Perhaps it is the idea of losing your independence, then. Or possibly…” Yoongi paused as something seemed to occur to him. “Ah.”
“What? What is it?”
“It is the mating bond, is it not?”
Going utterly still, you stared at him from across the table.
“Y/N,” Yoongi said softly. “Not all marriages occur with a mating bond. Not all loves do, either. And it is still possible Jungkook could be your mate. Humans have mated with Dragons before. It is not impossible for him to–”
Realizing what he meant then, a laugh left your lips. It sounded bitter, even to you. Yoongi thought you didn’t want to marry Jungkook because he wasn’t your mate. He thought you wanted to marry for love, when the truth was the exact opposite.
“I know it is possible,” you gasped, interrupting. “I know it is possible because Jungkook is my mate, Yoongi. I have known this fact since I was seventeen and visited him for the treaty.”
Yoongi’s eyes widened as you pressed on.
“I felt it even then,” you whispered, the words pouring out. “It was hardly anything at that age, barely more than a brush of energy against my skin, but… I knew. I knew the mating bond lay between us.”
Silence fell between you, the weight of what you’d said settling over the table. Eventually, Yoongi managed to shake himself free from his stupor.
“Then what is the problem?” he demanded. “If you two are mates, surely this is even more reason for you to accept his proposal. It must be a sign from Natal.”
Jaw clenched, you looked away. The mere thought of accepting the bond brought a dull roar to your ears, twisting your insides into knots. You could never forget what occurred after your trip to Duret Ghal, nor the solemn vow you had made at your coronation.
“I cannot marry him,” you said stiffly.
Incredulity entered Yoongi’s gaze. “But Y/N –”
“I cannot,” you said, turning your head. “Yoongi, you know as well as I do how bonds like this end. How it looks, how it feels for someone to lose their mate. I vowed when I accepted the crown it would be the only constant in my life.”
Pity filled Yoongi’s gaze as realization dawned.
“Y/N,” he said after a long moment. “You are not your father.”
The silence in the room drew as taut as a bowstring.
“It killed him,” you whispered. “The loss of my mother killed my father. You know this to be true. It may have taken him five years, but from the moment she died, he began to die as well. I cannot – I will not – do that to myself, or to Ashya.”
Yoongi stared at you a moment before he looked away.
It was a silent truth acknowledged throughout the Kingdom. Dragons had a long lifespan, but the mating bond was something other and strange. It only occurred once in a lifetime and was a love so deep, so true that to lose one’s mate was to lose oneself.
Your father had tried, at least. He’d stayed alive for you, for his Kingdom, but it had not been enough in the end. After five years of trying, he’d finally given in.
It was why you’d enlisted after your mother’s death. You had seen how her loss was killing your father and could not bear to be around for the process.
When you finally returned to accept the crown, you’d made your vow. The same fate would not befall you. You would not become your father and leave Ashya at risk. You would not accept the mating bond – which meant you would not accept Jungkook.
Even if every fiber of your being wished to do so.
Jungkook was not yet fully your mate. He needed to be aware of the bond, for one and you needed to accept it, for another. Tendrils already existed, but it was not the same thing as the full bond in place. Once you accepted, there would be no return.
“Not everyone views their mate as a bad thing,” Yoongi said quietly.
Startled, you looked up. “They are fools, then.”
He frowned at his glass. “Are we not all fools in love, though?”
“Precisely the reason I do not care to accept it.”
Smiling sadly, Yoongi lifted his drink and drained the rest. His expression shifted from resignation to thoughtfulness while he set down his glass.
“They say the loss of a mate is akin to ripping one’s heart from their chest,” he mused. “They say it is an unbearable pain, one which cannot be endured.”
“Are you trying to help me?”
He paused. “I only wonder… for such unimaginable pain, there must be unimaginable beauty before it. What could be so wonderful that to be without it would be close to death?” Yoongi shook his head. “Maybe the loss of a mate has no parallel because its happiness has no parallel, either.”
Struck by this statement, you looked into the fire.
“It is not a bad thing to want happiness, Your Majesty.”
Brow furrowed, you continued to stare at the leaping flames. It was not a bad thing to want happiness, but the mating bond had never meant such a thing to you.
Not until Jungkook. When he had arrived a week prior, you’d kept him at arm’s length for two reasons. One had been his title and Duret Ghal’s legacy, but the other had been self-preservation.
You could not miss what you did not know. Unfortunately, each passing day brought you closer together and you feared when he left, it would tear your heart from your chest.
Still, it was better than accepting him as your mate.
Yoongi stood from the table and stretched his arms overhead. Looking up, you appreciated the silence he gave you. The truth of the bond was something you hadn’t told anyone. To share it with him felt like a weight lifted.
“There are more negotiations tomorrow,” Yoongi said, returning to business. “With the secret of the riders’ magic revealed, we will need to factor this into our military discussions.”
“Agreed,” you said quietly.
Yoongi considered you a moment longer before he turned around. As he reached the door, Yoongi paused on the threshold.
“I understand your hesitance, Your Majesty,” he said quietly. “I would not blame you if you decided not to accept him. It is only for your happiness I urge you to reconsider. Not all of us are gifted with a mate,” he said simply, and walked out the door.
As the door shut behind him, you stared at the wood.
You remained seated for some time, listening to your heartbeat, and imagining it entwined with someone else’s. This was the second secret of yours only Yoongi knew.
The other was you hadn’t wanted to accept the throne at all.
When your father had died, you’d been content to stay in the armed forces, living a life of anonymity while you served Ashya. You had planned on relinquishing the crown, but Yoongi had known and convinced you to return. He’d been the one to talk some sense into you, saying if you truly wished to serve Ashya, you’d do so best in the role you’d been born into – as its Queen.
Duty had been thrust upon you sooner than it should have; yet another reason why you resented the bond. You should not have become Queen when you did. You should not have had to accept the burden so soon and yet, you had. It had been the right course and you deeply loved this nation.
It was why you refused to put Ashya through such a thing again.
And yet, you could not help but think upon Yoongi’s words. It was not a bad thing to want happiness for yourself.
After a long time, you roused yourself from the table and went to bed.
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The first time you’d felt the bond had been at the cliffs, although you had not realized what it was at the time.
It had only been later, in the middle of Duret Ghal’s gardens, you understood the gravity of what you felt for Jungkook. Or rather, what you one day might feel.
After the day you spent riding, you’d began to notice Jungkook’s presence more and more. He could usually be found in one of two places – in the palace library or out on his dragon, Nemrys. You had found yourself watching for him, somehow attuned to his presence.
Even with all this, the magnitude had not stricken you until the night of the ball. On the last night of your trip, Duret Ghal decided to celebrate both your betrothal and the anticipated treaty. No expense had been spared for the evening. Even now, you remembered the sounds of the orchestra playing, chandeliers bright above as the people laughed and danced.
At some point, you’d searched for the Prince and found him no longer inside. Curious, your search had led you out the northern doors, onto a patio which overlooked the gardens below.
Duret Ghal had been colder than Ashya, but during the summer the evening air had been pleasantly cool. Wandering away from the castle, you’d drifted amongst the flowers until you came upon him.
Jungkook had faced away from you, his hands clasped behind his back while he watched the tree above with its delicate, orange blossoms. His eyes had been closed; wayward, dark strands of hair blown over his face.
Realizing you’d intruded upon a personal moment, you turned to take your leave, and stepped on a twig. 
Jungkook’s eyes had flown open and when he saw you, he smiled.
The sight sent such simmering warmth through your chest, you’d nearly stopped breathing. White-hot energy blazed across your skin, brightening the world while you basked in his gaze.
That had been the moment you realized. Jungkook was your mate.
“I – I am sorry,” you’d stammered, turning to leave. “I am intruding–”
“Not at all.” Jungkook’s gaze sought yours in darkness. “Please. Stay.”
After a moment of consideration, you had acquiesced. The closer you moved, the more aware you’d become of his energy. Suddenly, all the wives’ tales and legends about mating made sense. The bond had been real, and you felt it for Jungkook.
Jungkook had smiled at you, then returned to the flowers. “Were you also tired of the people gathered inside?” 
“Yes,” you’d murmured.
None of the people inside had been him.
Forcing yourself to look up, you had focused on the tree. It was not a species native to Ashya; its delicate, floral scent was unfamiliar. Between its boughs, the night stars had peered down. Legends said stars were where Natal’s veil was thinnest and otherworldly magic seeped through the cracks. You liked to imagine stars held some kinship to dragons.
Jungkook had cleared his throat. “I must admit,” he’d said. “You are not at all what I imagined you to be.”
You had turned sideways to face him in the moonlight.
“Not that it is a bad thing, mind you.”
Heart racing, you you’d smiled. Jungkook had looked your way, his expression gentle in the light from above.
“It is not?” you had whispered.
Turning fully to face you, Jungkook had stepped closer. His right hand flexed at his side, as though he had yearned to reach out and touch you.
“No,” he’d admitted.
His gaze had dropped to your lips.
Your throat had gone dry. “What were you expecting?”
“I do not know,” he’d said. “I thought I might resent you. For taking away my choice to marry. For forcing me to become King before I was ready. For reminding me duty will always be greater than our happiness.”
Each word he said had sunk your heart like a stone. It had been how you’d felt at the start of your journey, but perhaps not then.
“Now though,” he’d said, and you lifted your gaze.
Without quite meaning to, you’d drifted closer. The space between you had lessened to several inches, the heat from his body near-tangible.
“Now,” Jungkook had said, barely audible. “I find myself intrigued by what the future will hold.”
Before you could respond to this, before you could say you felt the same, a shout had echoed throughout the gardens.
“Prince Jungkook!” someone had called.
Springing apart, your heart had protested the movement. You had known then exactly who Jungkook was. He was your mate, your betrothed and for a fleeting moment, the world seemed a magical place.
One month following, his Uncle had staged his rebellion.
Soon after, you’d learned what the mating bond truly meant.
The world had not seemed quite so wondrous after that.
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“So.” Jimin arched a brow. “I assume you have brought us out at this unseemly hour to do more than stare at one another through the mist, Your Majesty.”
Giving Jimin a withering look, you chose not to respond.
Yesterday had been full of meetings with little importance to the Ghalian treaty. After telling Yoongi of your vow and bond, you’d found yourself more aware of Jungkook’s presence than ever before.
Everything which had taken place over the past forty-eight hours resulted in three facts. The first being, you could not afford to spend more time in the King’s presence. Already, your façade of indifference was crumbling and would only worsen as time went on.
Second, Mor had become bolder in their travels north. It would only be a matter of time before war arrived on your borders. You needed to be prepared.
Which led you to your third point. Jungkook’s reveal of magic could turn the tide of the war; it needed to be factored into your discussions as soon as possible. Which was why you’d asked Jungkook to bring whomever he deemed appropriate to the field this morning.
Glancing around, you found Jungkook looking back. He was dressed in his flying leathers again, simple armor reinforced at the joints with lighter metal. No breastplate, his hair unadorned and a broadsword strapped firmly across his back.
He’d brought Taehyung with him, along with the woman rider you’d seen at the feast and Lord Seokjin. The last one had surprised you, since you hadn’t thought Seokjin a rider. From Ashya, you’d brought Jimin, Namjoon and Yoongi.
“We are not here to stare,” you explained to Jimin. “But to fly.”
Jimin hesitated. “With each other,” he clarified.
It was not a question but a statement, and the woman rider across the circle seemed to share in his sentiment. She stared distrustfully at the group gathered on your side.
Yoongi squinted up at the sky. “Why am I here, then?” he wondered aloud.
“To observe,” you informed.
“Scintillating,” he said, looking down.
Namjoon laughed as several other people attempted to hide their smiles. Ignoring all this, you focused instead on Jungkook’s delegation.
“I believe I have met everyone except you,” you said, looking at the woman.
“Maia,” she said, boldly meeting your gaze. “I am a rider in His Majesty’s forces.”
“One of our best,” Jungkook added, as Taehyung nodded.
Maia had large, dark eyes and short hair bound in a plait down her neck. Her features were pretty, delicate in contrast to her hardened exterior. You respected her for being in the delegation but found yourself appreciating her even more for her no-nonsense response.
Nodding once, you looked away. The pride in Jungkook’s voice when he spoke had not escaped you; nor had the way Maia glanced in his direction, as though pleased by the mention.
Jungkook was not yours to want, you reminded yourself. You’d made sure of this with the vow you continued to uphold. Still, you felt your jaw clench as you refocused on your surroundings.
“Is this a serious request?” Jimin asked in disbelief. “You truly wish for us to fly alongside the riders.”
Pointedly, Seokjin cleared his throat. “I believe it is not considered polite to question the Queen’s sanity in her presence?”
Jimin glanced at him, stunned as Yoongi started to laugh. His smile widened, eyes nearly disappearing when Jimin turned to face him, incensed.
“What?” Yoongi snorted. “That was funny.”
“Regardless,” you said, a bit louder. “There is much to discuss. His Majesty has shared information about the riders, their dragons and what they can do which may change the battle against Mor.”
Maia’s glanced at Jungkook in disbelief, and she was not the only one. Taehyung also turned his head sharply, which surprised you. You had thought Jungkook would tell his general he’d revealed his magic in the woods.
It appeared not. Seokjin was the only one who did not look surprised, examining the nails on the back of his hand.
“What the riders can do,” Namjoon said, picking up on the key phrase. “I assume you refer to something other than flying, Your Majesty?”
“I do, yes.”
When you looked at Jungkook, he nodded.
“She is referring to our ability to use magic,” he explained. “The bond which links rider to dragon allows us to do more than just ride them. It grants us access to their magic, similar to humans who are born with a gift.”
Namjoon’s eyes widened, as did Jimin’s.
Both listened as Jungkook went on to explain the history of dragons and magic on the continent. When Jungkook healed a paper cut Namjoon had on his thumb, your advisor gasped and looked on in wonder.
“A healer.” He shook his head. “Truly amazing. How large of an injury can you heal?” Namjoon asked, and you knew he was already thinking ahead to battle.
Someone like Jungkook behind the front lines, healing soldiers as they were injured, could provide an untold advantage.
“He healed me in the woods the other day,” you informed them. “A Mor patrol shot me down with a crossbow, and His Majesty saved my life.”
Jimin’s eyes widened. “It would seem we are in your debt then, Your Majesty,” he told Jungkook, seeming displeased by the thought.
Jungkook merely shook his head.
“Let us not speak of debt, Jimin,” you said before Jungkook could speak. “If we are to work together, we must stop thinking of our relationship as a ledger. Instead, we must learn to work as a unit.”
Yoongi arched a brow, clearly amused by your shifted stance.
“Hence our flying this morning,” Jungkook agreed.
Looking his way, you nodded.
This was what you’d decided after your conversation with Yoongi. Although you had not changed your mind about accepting Jungkook’s proposal, the least you could do was set aside your own differences. If you chose not to accept him as your mate, that was your decision – but first and foremost, you were Ashya’s Queen.
You had made a vow to do whatever you could for your country, and this meant working closely with the Ghalians.
“Is it only healing magic?” Namjoon asked, sounding curious. “Or are there other kinds?”
Rather than answer, Jungkook looked at Taehyung, who rolled up his sleeves. Walking out of the circle, he came to a stop several paces away.
“There are other kinds of magic,” Taehyung said, and it was one of the first times you’d ever heard him speak.
Taehyung’s voice had a deep, earthen quality. It was soothing, rhythmic and you stared at him with interest as he spread his hands.
For a moment, nothing happened.
Then Taehyung closed his eyes and storm clouds began to gather. You stared at the sky as it darkened, russet-tipped thunderheads swirling overhead. As the wind whipped his hair, Taehyung opened his eyes and you saw they’d turned silver.
A bolt of lightning shot from his palms, lighting the sky above a deep purple. He let the tempest continue until his point had been made. Then, teeth gritted, Taehyung lowered his arms and allowed the clouds to disperse. As quickly as they’d come, the clouds disappeared, leaving only mist and the rising sun.
Everyone from Ashya stared.
“His dragon is a stormmaker,” Jungkook explained. “It is rare for one of their kind to bond with a human. It has not happened within living memory.”
Yoongi was the first to regain himself. “Do all riders have magic?”
“No,” answered Maia. “It is similar to when a Dragon and human have a child. The child does not always have a gift. It is the same with riders and dragons. I, for example, have no magic.”
“Yes, but you have a dragon,” Yoongi pointed out, which made her smile.
“I do have that,” she acknowledged.
Almost sheepish, Taehyung rejoined the circle with his hands in his pockets. His gaze had returned to dark brown, but you could not seem to shake the memory of silver. It was a tremendous power you could use on the battlefield.
Abruptly, you turned to Jungkook. “How were you planning to keep that a secret?” you demanded, waving a hand. “I should think it would have been obvious once your rider started throwing lightning around.”
“Hence why we planned on explaining after the treaty,” Jungkook said mildly.
“All this time.” Namjoon finally found his voice. “Magic in Duret Ghal has been passed down by the riders, not Dragons?”
“Both,” Seokjin corrected. “Riders cannot pass on their magic to their children. It is only the offspring of Dragon and human who can be born with gifts. Like your advisor,” he said, nodding to Yoongi.
Yoongi arched a brow. You had not spoken openly about his magical abilities, but you supposed word got around.
Namjoon continued to frown. “Most peculiar,” he said slowly. “When a shapeshifting Dragon mates with a human, their offspring can inherit one of many magical gifts. Not just shapeshifting.”
“Uzza, my dragon, has a theory about that,” Taehyung offered. “He believes dragons have a more fixed nature than humans. When magic is passed down through dragons, it remains the same, but with humans… we are more fluid.” He paused, then shrugged. “Magic becomes whatever form the human is closest to.”
“Fascinating,” Namjoon breathed.
“Which is why I asked the King and his riders to join us this morning,” you announced. “Once the treaty is finalized, we will fight together against Mor. It is time we learned how to use everything in our arsenal.”
Jimin, who had remained silent throughout the demonstration, finally nodded.
Despite his personal feelings towards Duret Ghal, he would always place Ashya above all else. If the magic of the riders was something you could use to your advantage, Jimin would be the one who figured out how to do it.
Still, you knew this must hurt. You were not the only one who noticed Jimin’s reticence. Taehyung had been watching your commander from across the circle, and he now cocked his head as he took a step forward.
“You are Park Jimin, are you not?” he asked.
Jimin met Taehyung’s gaze. “I am.”
Taehyung nodded. “I have heard stories of you, both on and off the battlefield. Neither of us led our respective armies when your father was killed,” he said, a bit quieter. “But all the same, I am sorry for your loss.”
Jimin’s eyes glinted. “Sorrow does not bring back the dead.”
“No, it does not.”
Jimin stared at him a moment, until some of the anger faded from his gaze. Finally, he looked at the castle and exhaled.
“Are we to fly this morning?” he asked, returning to you. “If we are, we should probably go before the sun gets too high.”
You nodded, uncertain what had just transpired.
“We should leave, then.” Jimin turned away. “I will need to know the full capabilities of your riders. General Kim,” he called out as he walked. “Can you control the lightning, or merely call it?”
Taehyung fell into step alongside him, discussing strategy as they left the field. You watched them go, amazed Jimin had released his past so easily.
Namjoon sighed. “Must I fly as well, Your Majesty?”
You hid a smile. “If you truly wish to stay on the ground…”
Grumbling beneath his breath, Namjoon turned to follow Jimin across the field. You knew you should go as well, but something within seemed to hold you back.
“And what about you?” you asked, glancing at Seokjin. “Are you a rider?”
Seokjin grimaced. “No, Your Majesty. My mother sent me to the bonding ceremony, but all I succeeded in was falling off several dragons.”
“It is where we met though,” Jungkook said, jumping in. “I admired his honesty and wit. Enough that, when I became King, I requested Lord Seokjin be appointed to my closest court.”
“His honesty has been well-noted,” Yoongi said drily.
Maia laughed, her features losing some of their earlier tension. Yoongi glanced her way in surprise, a pleased flush spreading across his cheeks.
In the background, the steady beat of wings filled the air. When you turned, you saw Jimin in Dragon form rising above the sheds. His scales were a dazzling gold, sparkling as he flew across the morning sun.
Taehyung had joined atop his dragon, Uzza. Uzza had scales of slate grey, faded to blue along his spine and his shoulders.
As you watched them both fly, a bout of longing swept through you. Seeing a rider and Dragon fly alongside one another had not been something deemed possible before.
Their wings were swiftly drowned out by Nemrys’ arrival, who circled once overhead before landing beside Jungkook. Bowing, you kept your gaze fixed on his. Nemrys inclined his head in turn, then released a snort.
Jungkook grinned. “He wishes to know if you plan on being shot again.”
Rolling your eyes, you turned to walk away. Jungkook laughed at the sight, the sound of it echoing as you crossed the field.
Once inside a shed, you stripped quickly from your gown and laid this on the bench. Only a few days ago, you’d assumed dragons mostly unintelligent and now, one of them was insulting you. The realization made you smile.
It made the world seem wider, somehow. As though more things were possible than you’d previously thought.
Shifting quickly to Dragon form, you lifted from the ground and hovered above the sheds. In the distance, you could see Taehyung alongside Jimin on his dragon. Glancing west, you spotted Namjoon and Maia rising to join them.
Namjoon’s scales were a deep purple, a jewel-tone Ashyan miners would envy. Maia’s dragon, whom you did not know the name of, was a grey pale enough to be confused with blue. As you flew towards their group, Taehyung pointed from his dragon, Uzza.
Craning your neck, you saw Jungkook on the ground. He watched from below, wind whipping his hair as Nemrys beat his wings. Leaning down, he murmured something to Nemrys, who bent his legs and took off. Far below, you heard Seokjin whoop.
With a roar, Jimin dove towards the ground. Taehyung followed suit, along with Namjoon and Maia. Once Jungkook had reached you atop Nemrys, you joined in the show.
It was strange to fly as a group. Dragons were solitary creatures, only banding together when necessary for survival. When you did fly with others, you communicated through a combination of flame and roars, signaling what direction you were about to take.
Soaring higher, you turned your head and saw Jungkook beside you. From the back of Nemrys, he grinned and something warm bloomed in your chest. You recalled what it felt like to fly with him, against him. Something within you ached to feel this again.
This was not the time to reminisce though, so you attempted to focus on the moment at hand. That first flight didn’t last long – you were still monarchs, after all, and the day remained before you. Still, your heart felt lighter when you landed on the ground.
For a first foray between nations, things had gone relatively smoothly. Even Yoongi seemed pleased by the progress, speaking with Taehyung and Jimin as they returned to the castle. The success of today made the impossible seem possible.
Including some things you’d never let yourself imagine.
Jungkook’s face while he flew, his eyes bright and smile wide, played like a loop again and again in your mind.
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After another full day of negotiations, the treaty between you and Duret Ghal began to come together. It was a good thing, since Jungkook and his delegation would leave in the next couple of days.
Preparing for sleep that night, you reached for the jar of salve Hoseok had given you and found it empty. You’d applied it every morning and night, whenever the muscle ached, or you found yourself tired. It had helped a great deal, so now you hesitated. Flying this morning had been strenuous on your muscles.
Amara had left, gone to visit her family in the city for the evening. In her absence, you strode across your room and opened the door to the hall. You instructed one of your guards to bring the empty jar to Hoseok and ask for a refill.
While you waited for them to return, you changed into a nightgown and robe. You had just finished washing your face when a knock came from the hall. Expecting the guard returned with your salve, you strode from your chambers and pulled open the door.
You found yourself face to face not with a guard, but with Jungkook.
“Your Majesty,” you said, freezing in place. “I – to what do I owe this pleasure?”
Jungkook stared at you for a moment, then pulled a jar from behind his back. “I brought the salve from Hoseok,” he said. “I heard you were in need of more.”
“I am.” You blinked. “But you did not need to do that.”
His gaze searched yours, lingering when he dropped to your parted robe. Although you wore a nightgown beneath, you were suddenly aware of the sheer material.
Hastily, you closed the robe tighter.
Cheeks reddening, Jungkook looked up. “It was no trouble,” he said, only to pause. “May I come in, Your Majesty? I do have something I wish to discuss.”
“Ah, so there is an ulterior motive.”
Despite the humor in your voice, you hesitated. Glancing past him, you saw your guards and decided whatever Jungkook had to say, it was best to hear it in private.
“Alright,” you said, stepping aside. “You may come in.”
Surprise crossed his face, though it quickly disappeared. Nodding his thanks, Jungkook entered the room as you shut the door. You stared at it for a moment, gathering your courage before you turned around.
You’d brought many men to your chambers over the years. Yoongi had been in here only the other night, but something about Jungkook’s presence felt different. He was too big, taking up a space no one else could.
Perhaps it was this bond you felt for him, this tingling down your spine at having him so near. Your very soul ached for him, even as you denied him.
Jungkook wandered inside, taking in the décor. A fireplace took up much of the north wall, light flickering over the rug at your feet.
Coming to a stop at the table, Jungkook set down the jar.
“Why did you come?” you asked quietly.
Turning around, Jungkook found your gaze.
You realized the very real danger you were in. Not because Jungkook was your mate. He was, yes, but it was so much more than that. You genuinely enjoyed his company. You found yourself listening for his remarks when you sat by his side, trying not to laugh whenever he made a joke.
It was hard to separate the supernatural from the natural when it came to Jungkook. In a world where mates did not exist and souls were cast adrift, you thought you might have loved him even then. 
Perhaps this was the true magic of the mating bond, after all. Rather than let you wonder, Natal brought you an equal, someone who’d uplift your spirit rather than drag you under.
“You asked for additional salve,” Jungkook said again.
“I did.” You cocked your head. “A servant could have brought that, though – or Hoseok, if he chose.”
“Indeed, he could have.”
A shadow crossed Jungkook’s expression at this, gone before it could be fully realized. He took a step closer, skirting the table to come to a stop. With his height what it was, you were forced to look upwards to see him.
“The soldiers Jimin sent to search the mountains returned this afternoon,” Jungkook informed you. “They found no other Mor patrols so close to Ashya.”
“That is good to know,” you said with a nod. “We will need all the time we can to formulate a plan of attack.”
Thus far, Mor had made no overt advances against you. There had been skirmishes on the southern border, a few miles gained or lost with occasional pushes, but nothing serious. Mor’s full army remained within their own land, biding their days until they chose to strike.
It was only a matter of time before things boiled over. It made sense for Jungkook to discuss Mor’s movements with you, but he’d never visited your chambers to do so before.
“Is there something else you came here to say?” 
Jungkook arched a brow. “Is it possible I might have come simply to enjoy your presence?”
“You could have.”
“Then, what is the problem?”
“The problem,” you said, narrowing your gaze, “is you seem to be the kind of person who says one thing and means another.”
His gaze darkened. “I suppose you would know, Your Majesty.”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
Rather than answer this, Jungkook turned away. Staring out the window, he seemed to consider his words before he turned back.
“You are a conundrum, Your Majesty,” he said at last.
You sniffed. “That sounds like something a man might say when he does not understand a woman.”
“You are right,” Jungkook said lowly. “For I do not understand you at all.”
This made you blink. It was your own words from the night of the feast, thrown back in your face.
“In what way?” you demanded.
“We knew each other before, and yet you pretend to be strangers. You fight so valiantly for your own kind and yet, keep them at arm’s length. You decline my proposal of marriage,” he said, taking a step closer, “and yet, you consider a political union with another.”
You stared at him for a moment, utterly thrown. “A union with whom?”
“Lord Declan.”
A laugh escaped before you could help it. “Lord Declan is not my betrothed.”
“He tells people he is.”
“Then he is a liar,” you ground out.
Jungkook paused. “Did you consider his offer?”
“I considered your offer, as well.”
“Which you declined.”
“I shall decline him as well, should he ever gather the courage to actually ask me.”
Jungkook hesitated at this, curiosity entering his gaze.
“Why, though?” he asked, a tad softer. “Why decline everyone who asks for your hand? Is there someone else? The man who taught you to sign in the army, perhaps.”
At this, your eyes widened. “How did you know?”
“Merely a guess,” Jungkook said quietly.
Looking abruptly away, he rubbed his thumb to his forefinger in an anxious gesture. You wished he would stop. The gesture made him seem far too human, far too genuine, and tempting and true.
Before you could consider the ramifications, you said, “I do not love someone else.”
You were not sure why you said it. Certainly, it would have been easier for Jungkook to think your heart belonged to another and yet, you could not bear to watch the light fade from his eyes.
Jungkook turned his head to see you. “So, it is me, then,” he said quietly.
“No. And also, yes.”
He frowned. “Clear as mud, Your Majesty.”
You laughed, although there was no humor to it. “What do you expect me to say? That you have convinced me after a week of interactions? That I am awed by your presence, Your Majesty? Is this what you seek in return for healing me in the forest? My hand in marriage?”
Jungkook looked stricken. “No,” he breathed. “Not that. Never that. I would never demand such a thing.”
Something in you softened at his sincerity.
“Then, what?” you asked quietly. “What is it?”
“I just… I wish you would tell me why.”
Unable to meet his gaze, you glanced away. It was a fair question. Jungkook had been nothing but good in the time he’d been here. It occurred to you suddenly that by choosing not to mate, you were taking away his one chance at the bond, as well.
Slowly, you turned back to face him. “I made a vow,” you said, so soft you could hardly hear. “When I became Queen, I vowed I would never marry. It is not something I can turn my back on.”
It was a half-truth, but enough for now.
Jungkook’s brow furrowed. “Why would you make such a vow?”
“Many reasons,” you said. “The main being I wish to belong only to myself and my country. Anything else, and I would do my people a disservice. When I accepted the crown, I said Ashya would always come first.”
The way Jungkook was staring at you made you feel on display, as though he saw through to your very soul and knew what you were made of.
“It is a tricky slope, is it not?” he said at last, stepping closer.
This step brought him within touching distance, the heat of his body seeming to reach out to yours. Something golden and strong brightened between you.
“What do you mean?” 
Jungkook did not look away. “Is the best version of yourself the one without help? Without support? You say you do not wish to do your people a disservice, but is it a disservice to lead while you are unhappy?”
“And you think... marrying you would make me happy?”
“Maybe not,” he admitted, his gaze soft. “All I know is the life you speak of does not sound like a life at all.”
Having no response to this, you could only stare when Jungkook took your hand in his. Lifting your hand, he kept his gaze on yours. As he lowered his gaze, his lips slowly brushed the back of your fingers.
When he released you, you found you could not move, could hardly breathe. It seemed impossible to hide your reaction when Jungkook looked up.
You wanted him. You wanted him so badly it hurt and yet, something continued to hold you back. All you could see when you looked at Jungkook was the pain in your father’s eyes when he learned your mother had died.
“I will take my leave,” Jungkook said when you did not respond. “It has been a long day, and you must be tired.”
You nodded, unable to do more than that when he turned to go.
Halfway to the door, you had the sudden urge to do something. To call out, to ask him to come back, to reveal the bond you felt strengthening between you.
In the end you did none of it. The fear of being broken was greater than your want to be whole.
Jungkook turned at the door. “My offer will stay until I go,” he said before he went.
The door shut behind him, leaving you in silence. Exhaling, you walked to the table and uncapped a decanter. Pouring yourself a glass of wine, you sat before the fire and drank every drop.
It was a long time before you managed to fall asleep that night.
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During your flight the next morning, you went north instead of south. Although Jimin had not found additional Mor patrols, your run-in with them had increased your caution. Soaring above the tree line, the sun brightening the horizon, your heart felt heavier than it had in a while.
When you finally landed and hurried inside, you were entirely alone.
For the first time, this did not strike you as such a good thing.
Independence had always been one of your most prized possessions. Your crown had stripped you of so much – your youth, freedom, and the first man you’d loved. Now though, you wondered what you’d given up by clinging to your ideals so tightly.
You did not have much time to consider it. The ball for Duret Ghal was tonight, and the day after tomorrow, their delegation would leave. You would sign the treaty in the morning and then they would be off.
Jungkook’s offer of marriage would disappear with it.
Amara had outdone herself with your dress for the evening. It was crimson in color, falling in gauzy pleats from a golden, metal bodice. Amara had dusted gold powder across your shoulders, resulting in a shimmering aura.
Red was neither the color of Ashya, nor of Duret Ghal. It was the color of fire, of passion – and of love, you realized with a twisting stomach.
Again, Yoongi was your escort and even his eyes widened as you stepped out the door.
“You are going to give someone a heart attack,” he chuckled, extending his arm.
You merely shook your head as you walked down the hall. The crown you wore tonight was gold, as well. A relic from an ancient Queen of Ashya before the colors had changed to silver and green.
“I am sure they will be fine,” you responded. “It is not as though I plan on shifting in the middle of a waltz.”
“It would certainly liven things up if you did.”
Although you gave Yoongi a look, you quickly fell silent as you approached the ball. Beyond the shut doors, you could hear muffled noises of music and laughter.
“Did Namjoon tell you about the dancing?”
Sharply, you turned your head. “No, he did not. What dancing?”
“Apparently, it is the custom in Duret Ghal for their monarch to lead the first dance.”
“I wish His Majesty the best of luck, then.”
Yoongi hid a smile. “You will need to dance also, Your Majesty.”
“Why is that?”
“Perhaps you are unfamiliar with the concept of balls,” Yoongi mused. “Typically, there is food, dancing, general merriment…”
“I know what a ball is, Yoongi.”
“You seemed confused by the prospect of dancing, though.”
“By the prospect of dancing with His Majesty, yes.”
“Now I am the one who is confused, because –”
“Fine,” you ground out as the doors began to open. “I will dance the first song with His Majesty. Nothing more.”
Yoongi grinned, patting your arm as you entered the room.
The ballroom had been lavishly decorated for tonight’s event. Taking it in, you passed over iced draperies, flowers and foliage spilling from every surface. People were gathered throughout, leaving room in the center of the ballroom for you to dance. An orchestra sat poised in the corner, awaiting your entrance to start the first song.
As you and Yoongi descended the spiral staircase, you only had eyes for the opposite side, where the delegation from Duret Ghal already stood. To where Jungkook was standing, watching your entrance.
His robes were similar to those he’d worn at the feast, although the colors tonight were black and gold. Long robes cut to mid-calf, tied in the middle by a black sash. Sigils of gold had been stitched into the fabric, with a thin chain of gold curved across his chest.
Lifting your gaze, your breath caught in your throat. Jungkook’s hair had been bound in a half-bun, the dark tresses broken only by his golden crown.
Walking closer to him under the lights, everything else seemed to fade. Despite your best efforts, something between you had shifted and now that it had, you couldn’t turn back.
You started imagining what the future would look like beside him. Not a future where you were lesser, but rather where you had support. Strength, like he had offered. Oddly enough, the image did not scare you as it once did.
Stepping onto the dais to turn around, you looked at the crowd. In your peripheral, you could see Jungkook looking at you. Ignoring him, you focused instead on your racing heart. You could almost feel it beat in tandem to his, yearning to run at the same pace.
It was not necessary to greet your guests, nor give a speech of pretty words. Instead you simply turned to face him as the music began. Jungkook held out his hand, waiting until you placed your palm over his.
Jungkook’s fingers curled about yours, leading you on the dance floor. People parted as you walked, leaving a space at the center. Jungkook pulled you to face him, placing a hand on your waist as you settled yours on his shoulder.
You looked up. Meeting your gaze, Jungkook took a step backwards to lead you in the first move.
His grip on you tightened as he led you in a spin. Jungkook was a good dancer, although this did not surprise you. By this point he could have announced he was the goddess Natal, herself, and you would have taken it in stride.
This image made you smile, unable to stop it as he swept you around.
“Why are you smiling?” Jungkook asked, his voice low.
Startled, you glanced up and wished you had not. This close, you could see everything, and it made your heart ache.
“I was imagining something funny,” you murmured.
Jungkook’s hand slid to the small of your back. Heat scalded your spine, making your head spin.
“Not about me, I hope,” Jungkook said, his lips dangerously close to your ear.
“And if it were?”
His grip on you tightened. “I would like to know the joke.”
Looking up, you met his gaze. “Does it ever tire you?”
Jungkook blinked.
Others had joined the dance at this point, entering the floor in a promenade. Multicolored skirts and robes swept circles around you, leaving you floating at the center of it all.
“Does what ever tire me?” Jungkook asked.
“This,” you said, glancing at your surroundings. “The pressure. The weight. The constant duties, expectations and never-ending loneliness of wearing our crowns.”
For a moment, Jungkook was silent, and you feared you’d overstepped. Then he exhaled, pulling you closer. His thumb brushed against the bare curve of your back.
“Every day,” he admitted.
Before you could respond, the song came to an end.
Couples stepped apart, talking, and laughing in the lull between songs. You and Jungkook stared at one another, the only two in the room as far as you were concerned. For so long, you had convinced yourself having a mate would be a bad thing.
Perhaps it was for some. For your parents, their bond had ended tragically, this was for certain. But for the first time, you wondered if keeping yourself from happiness because you didn’t want to be hurt might simply be a different kind of hurt itself.
When a hand tapped you on the shoulder, you nearly jumped.
Whirling around, you found Lord Declan before you. You stared at him for a few moments, wondering why he was here.
“Your Majesty.” Lord Declan bowed low at the waist. “Would you do me the honor of having the next dance?”
Of course – this was a ball. You would be expected to dance with others, not only Jungkook. Feet faltering, you glanced sideways but before you could decline, Jungkook took a step back.
“She is all yours,” he said, turning around.
Jungkook disappeared, his midnight-colored robes swishing about his ankles. Lord Declan closed in, forcing your attention away as the orchestra began the next song.
“Yes,” you said, trying to focus. “You may, Lord.”
Lord Declan entered where Jungkook had left off, his right hand slipping beneath yours as his other found your waist. His touch felt wrong, as though you’d put the opposite glove on your hand.
“How fortunate the first dance of the night was a short one,” Lord Declan said with a chuckle.
Startled, you glanced up. “I beg your pardon?”
“I envy your patience, Your Majesty,” he continued, oblivious to your tone. “Had I been forced to spend so long these past weeks in the presence of riders…” Breaking off, he shuddered. “Your control is exemplary.”
Had Lord Declan been a wise man, he might have noticed the heat simmering in your gaze. Or the way your spine stiffened, a lone muscle ticking in your jaw. As it were though, Lord Declan was not a smart man, and so he continued to throw caution to the wind.
You were not certain when you’d become so defensive of Jungkook, but the fact remained the Lord’s comments made you see red.
“I do not know that I would call my control exemplary,” you said, your tone deceptively light. “Indeed, my Lord, I find my courtiers often say things I find infuriating.”
Lord Declan paused, clued in by your choice of words.
“If I have said something to offend Your Majesty…”
His steps were not as graceful as Jungkook’s, nearly stepping on your toes as you turned around. Dodging the gesture, you glanced aside and realized Jungkook had not left the dance floor. Instead, he danced with Maia at the edge of the room. While you were watching, Jungkook threw his head back and laughed.
Unpleasantness curdled your stomach despite your insistence he was not yours to want.
“You have said something to offend me, Lord,” you said, returning to Declan. “Either you are ignorant or stupid, and I pray to Natal you are not both.”
Lord Declan stared, his jaw sagging a little.
“We face an enemy,” you said, voice lowering. “Our enemy is not Duret Ghal, nor is it their riders. I suggest you cease speaking such heresy before I wonder if the mines your family owns would do better in the hands of someone else.”
His eyes widened. “Your Majesty, I do not think –”
“Then we are in agreement,” you said, dropping your arms to take a step back.
Turning around, you stalked towards the edge of the dance floor, barely managing to keep your steam in check. When you glanced again at the offending corner, Jungkook and Maia had disappeared.
Driven by a mix of emotions you dared not name, you slipped beyond the courtiers and out a side door. Eyes closed, you allowed the night air to wash over you. Coming to a stop at the edge of the gardens, you opened your eyes to take in the Thadal mountains.
It was colder than it had been a few weeks ago. The winter solstice was coming, and your human skin could only protect you from so much. Still, you could not stomach returning to the party and so, you kept walking, entering the dark hedges.
You let yourself wander, following the twists and turns with nothing but your heart as its guide. When you turned a corner and found Jungkook before you, it almost was not a surprise.
The moment was overlaid with another memory, from ten years prior. The night you’d realized Jungkook was your mate and looked to the future with wonder.
He was alone again, facing away as he stared into an empty, cracked basin. The fountain had been turned off for the winter and before you could speak, Jungkook sighed.
“Were you not enjoying the party?” he asked.
Walking forward, you came to a stop beside him. “I might ask you the same thing,” you said, staring into the basin. “I saw you enjoying yourself during the last dance.”
Jungkook turned his head.
“Are you jealous, Your Majesty?” he murmured, his gaze flinty.
“Merely noting the obvious,” you said, refusing to face him. “You call me a conundrum and yet, you dance with another woman while proposing marriage to me.”
“One dance.”
“So, there has never been anything between you?”
Jungkook paused. “I will not pretend to have been celibate these past ten years. Neither should you, Your Majesty.”
Looking at him, you attempted to calm the roiling feelings within you. It was not right to feel like this. Not right to be jealous, to berate him when you continued to decline his offer.
“Am I correct,” he said, his voice low, “in thinking you do not want me for yourself, yet you do not want anyone else to have me either?”
“That… that is not fair.”
“Perhaps you know how I feel, then,” Jungkook said, his gaze hardening.
Startled, your eyes widened as he took a step closer. Coming to a stop right before you, Jungkook looked down.
“Watching you entertain other men,” he said hotly. “Watching you dance with other men, consider other men while you continue to deny what lies between us. What we are to one another. My former betrothed. And my mate,” he added, his gaze like dark fire.
Speechless, you could only stare in response.
Jungkook knew.
He knew and had said nothing this entire time. You wondered when he’d realized but lost your head entirely when he lifted a hand. Pressing his thumb beneath your chin, Jungkook tipped your head up.
Bending, he brushed your lips against his. The kiss was chaste, sweet – and wildfire erupted in response. Before you could stop yourself, your hand had fisted in his robes to drag him down. You kissed him back hungrily, fiercely as the heat consumed you.
Jungkook seemed to burn just as bright, crushing you close. His arms wrapped around you, tongue eagerly flicking against your lower lip. When you parted beneath him, he licked into your mouth. Inhaling his scent, you wanted him closer.
It was not at all how you’d imagined it to be.
You had thought once you gave in, it would feel like erasing yourself. Removing the old to make way for the new, but it was not like that at all. Letting him in only made you feel stronger.
Thumbs skimming your cheeks, Jungkook angled you upward and kissed you again. He drew a shuddering breath before he forced himself to stop.
Slowly, his eyes opened and he stared at you, his chest rising and falling.
“If you do not want this, though.” Hoarse, his thumbs caressed your skin. “I do not wish to force it upon you. You should not marry me because of a bond, Your Majesty. Nor should you because you think it’s what’s best for Ashya. I want you to marry me because you want to. Nothing more.”
When you did not respond, Jungkook’s expression began to shutter and he took a step backwards. His hands fell to his sides, the air between you turning cold.
All too late, you realized you’d waited too long. You should have said something immediately, should have done something other than kiss him like a maniac.
“Thank you,” Jungkook said. “For the hospitality you’ve shown Duret Ghal these past weeks. Whatever your feelings are for me, I look forward to signing the treaty tomorrow.”
Before you could say anything more, Jungkook walked past you and left the gardens. You were left alone beside an empty basin.
You stayed there for a while, staring at the looming Thadal mountains, and wondering how in the world you had gotten things so wrong.
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When you returned to the proceedings of the ball, Yoongi was smart enough not to ask where you had been. He seemed to know anyways, based on the look on your face.
Stiffly you stood and surveyed the dancing couples. Whenever you cared to look, you caught glimpses of Jungkook on the opposite side.
You tried not to, but this proved to be difficult now that you knew. Jungkook knew you were his mate. You knew what his lips tasted like. All of this you knew and could not forget.
It was his last words which ran again and again through your mind. Jungkook knew you were his mate and yet, he’d said nothing because he wanted you to choose him for him. It was such a foolhardy, romantic notion it made your heart ache.
Even with Leo, you had not felt this way. If you had been honest, you had known your relationship would be doomed from the start. Leo had never challenged you in ways which made you grow. You’d kept him at arm’s length, never giving him the opportunity to know your true self. 
After the death of your parents, you’d been in a dark place. You had made the vow not to marry out of an attempt to protect yourself. Perhaps you’d grown beyond needing such things.
The next time you looked, Jungkook was looking back.
He glanced away quickly, but he’d looked. The realization made you take a step forward but before you could go to him, Yoongi leaned in.
“What did you say to him when you danced?”
Surprised, you glanced in his direction. You thought Yoongi meant Jungkook but then realized he looked at Lord Declan. Declan seemed flustered, pointedly looking anywhere but at you while Lord Larkin glared from across the room.
You stifled a snort. “Only the truth.”
“Which was?”
“That like it or not, Duret Ghal are our allies, so they better start acting like it.”
Quietly, Yoongi laughed as he straightened. “No wonder his father looks as though he swallowed something sour.”
Guiltily, you looked away. “I am sorry if I caused you trouble,” you said, knowing Yoongi would be the one to clean it up. “It is only –”
“You were right.” Yoongi nodded. “The world is changing, and they can either change with the times or be left behind. I am glad you said something.”
Shooting him a grateful look, you glanced again across the room and realized Jungkook had disappeared. Scanning the rest of the ball, you spotted some of his delegation but not their King. Maia was dancing with Namjoon and to your surprise, you realized Taehyung had asked Amara to dance.
Jungkook was nowhere to be seen. Despite his absence, you forced yourself to stay until Yoongi deemed it socially acceptable for you to leave. The last thing you wanted was to put the treaty in jeopardy because you’d overlooked proper etiquette.
As the evening went on, candles guttered low in the chandeliers and guests began to thin out the dance floor. People started disappearing, traveling home in groups of two and three. Sometime around midnight, you finally bade Yoongi goodnight.
Forgoing his offer of escort, you took a side hall and exited the ball. It was a quiet walk to your chambers, a silence which did not lessen once you were inside.
Removing your crown, you set this on your dresser and stared out the window. You wondered if this was your future. A cold, lonely existence where you always ended up in your room alone.
Jungkook was right.
You kept everyone at a distance because you were afraid of being hurt. You were afraid if you let them in, you’d grant them the power to tear your heart in two. The problem was you weren’t sure how much longer you’d have a heart to give.
It already felt like a feeble, weakened thing within your chest. You didn’t know how to make it work like it should. So accustomed to your own company, you were unable to respond to true acts of friendship. This struck you as a poor kind of ruler for any nation. 
It made you wonder if the vow you’d once made held no further weight.
Now was time to decide what kind of ruler you wanted to be, what kind of person you wanted to be moving forward. Your life could still be wondrous if you so wished.
Abruptly, you turned and strode for the door.
Your guards seemed surprised to see you leave, but let you pass by with a nod. Once in the hallways, your feet seemed to know the way. Down one hall, then the next, you found yourself entering the guest wing before your mind could catch up.
Depending on stature, guests of the crown stayed with varying proximity to your personal quarters. It was not far to the rooms Jungkook occupied, the most lavish guest suite in the castle.
Outside his room, your steps slowed before coming to a stop. Jungkook did not have guards posted outside his doors. Some might have seen this as a sign of naiveté, but you saw it for what it was. A symbol of trust.
Lifting a hand, you knocked on his door.
It took him a few seconds to answer, rustling noises telling you he was within. When he swung open the door, your mouth immediately went dry.
Jungkook had changed from his formal attire to a more casual tunic and trousers. It took a great deal of effort to keep your eyes on his face, and not wander towards the ink you saw peering out from his sleeves.
Surprise flickered in the depths of his gaze, although he quickly concealed it. Leaning a shoulder to the frame, Jungkook arched a brow.
“To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit, Your Majesty?”
Any words you wished to say dried up like a stream in the desert. Finally, you managed to rouse yourself.
“May I come in?” you asked.
Jungkook paused. For a moment, you were afraid he might tell you to go. You had turned him down so many times; surely it was time for him to return the favor.
Then he dipped his head and stepped aside, allowing you entrance. Heart pounding, you slipped past him and stood at the center of the room.
His rooms were your guest chambers, so you had obviously seen them before. Occasionally you met with foreign dignitaries or visitors. Jungkook had stayed long enough though, that portions of the room had begun to seem like his own.
The black and gold robes he’d worn to the ball were draped over a partition. A trunk remained half-open beside a table, full of stacks of books. It reminded you of your visit to Duret Ghal so long ago, where he could often be found in the library.
“Would you like wine?” Jungkook interrupted your thoughts.
Mutely, you nodded and reached for the crystal decanter. Midway there, Jungkook’s hand caught your wrist.
“Allow me,” he said, moving past.
You stopped and watched him pour two glasses of wine. One after the other, Jungkook set them down on the table.
“You knew,” you said quietly. “You knew you were my mate.”
Jungkook hesitated, continuing to stare at the wine.
After a moment, he lifted a glass and took a long sip. “Yes,” he admitted. “I knew.”
“When?” you demanded.
His eyes narrowed, looking up. “When did you know, Your Majesty?”
“At the end of my last visit to Duret Ghal.”
“I knew the moment I saw you,” he said quietly.
“You – what?”
Jungkook set his wine down. “Your arrival was scheduled for shortly before sundown,” he said. “My parents had dressed me in my best clothes, and I remember being angry about it. I remember standing there fuming, waiting for you to arrive. And then you did.”
His eyes shone. “I had never seen someone so beautiful.”
Hearing him speak, your breath caught in your chest. Jungkook began to walk closer, his expression inscrutable.
“I avoided you for a few days,” he continued. “Mates are rarer in Duret Ghal and for a while, I didn’t know what I was feeling. Even once I realized, I resented the bond. It was difficult enough to accept my own magic back then.”
“What changed your mind?”
“You.” His lips curled in a smile. “You surprised me. I found myself liking you despite myself. I started to realize the bond might not be such a bad thing.”
“So… this entire time, you have known,” you said in disbelief.
“I have.” His expression darkened. “As have you, it would seem.”
Guilty, you looked away. You had and it had not occurred to you to tell him.
That was a lie. It had occurred to you and you’d decided against it, because you did not think you could stomach denying the bond to his face.
Reaching out, Jungkook took your hand. The gesture was so simple, it nearly broke you in two. Glancing down, you marveled when he brushed his thumb over your skin. Jungkook gave you space to think until you found the courage to speak.
“You know my mother was killed ten years ago,” you said quietly. “My father survived the attack, but they were mated and when she passed… he could not bear it.” After a pause, you looked up. “He died five years later, and those five years were as torturous for everyone else as they were for him.”
“I am sorry to hear that,” Jungkook murmured.
“He tried,” you said, forcing yourself to remember.
To remember the days when your father had tried to go on. He’d tried for you and for Ashya, but it had not been enough. There had been no light in his gaze, no meaning behind his odd smiles. Although only your mother had died in the attack, you’d lost both your parents.
“I know he did,” you continued. “But the pain of losing his mate was too much. Everything which had been important simply faded away. I swore after he passed the same fate would not befall me. It is why I said no to you,” you said, your grip tightening. “It is not because I feel nothing. I said no to you because you are my mate.”
His thumb continued to soothe over your skin. “And now?” he asked, wondering. “Did you come here simply to say this?”
“No. Now I find myself wondering if in an attempt to spare myself pain, I created agony of a different kind.”
Jungkook’s gaze softened. “I meant what I said earlier, Y/N. I don’t wish for you to agree out of some sense of duty, or an unearthly bond.”
A shiver went down your spine at hearing your name on his lips.
“That is not why I am saying yes,” you said, lifting your chin.
Surprise flared in his gaze. “No?”
Deciding you needed the wine after all, you tugged your hand from his and turned towards the table. Lifting the glass to your lips, you let the sweet burn fill your throat.
In the corner of your eyes, you could see Jungkook watching. Waiting.
“I am saying yes because I want this,” you breathed, turning around. “I want you. I have wanted you since the day you followed me to the cliffs. I’m scared,” you admitted, barely more than a whisper. “I’m terrified of what you might do to me. Of what I might do to you. But I don’t want fear to hold me back anymore.”
Jungkook continued to stare at you, jaw working while he thought through what to say. His fingers began to tremble, fighting the rising tide of emotion.
“We face a difficult path,” he said at last.
You nodded. “I know.”
“The history between our people. Revealing the magic of the riders. War on the horizon,” he said, taking a step forward with each reason he listed.
“Do you not want me to say yes, Your Majesty?”
Jungkook came to a stop before you.
“I want you to say yes so badly it hurts,” he said hoarsely. “But I don’t want you to accept not knowing what it means.”
“The bond scared me for a long time,” you told him. “The idea of belonging to someone. Of no longer depending solely upon myself.”
“And why is that?”
“Loss of control.” Your smile was fleeting. “The idea has always terrified me more than any enemy. I feared the bond would mean losing myself… that it would mean…”
“Giving a part of yourself away.”
Quiet, you nodded.
“Did you not think, though,” he said, reaching out. “Giving a piece of yourself away might mean gaining something in return?”
Taking your hand in his, Jungkook laid them both on his heart.
You stared at your hand, splayed beneath his on his chest. The idea had not occurred to you, and yet – perhaps it should have.
“I have no doubt you will remain independent,” Jungkook insisted. “Accepting this bond would not change that. I would not want that to change.”
“But if I were to die –”
“Love is always a liability,” Jungkook quietly said. “It is. And yet, where would we be without it? My love for Nemrys, for Duret Ghal and the riders saved me when my parents died. A world without love is not one worth fighting for.”
Ever so gentle, you brushed the curve of his hand with your thumb.
Jungkook’s grip on yours tightened.
“Yes,” you breathed. Chest practically touching, you looked up to see him. “I know all this, and I’m saying yes.”
For the first time, you let yourself look at him fully.
You had known he was beautiful, but the truth was he was nearly unbearable. Strong jaw, soft lips and eyes which burned as fierce as any Dragon. You did not look at them though, wanting to take in the rest of him first. Lifting a hand, you cupped the side of his face.
Jungkook shivered at your touch. Startled, you glanced up and met his gaze. The need you found within nearly undid you.
For so long, this had been building inside. Suddenly the idea of you tolerating, let alone enjoying another man’s company seemed a strange concept. Jungkook was your mate, someone who had never once cowered from who and what you were.
Turning his head, Jungkook’s lips brushed your palm.
“What are you thinking?” he murmured.
“I am remembering earlier. Your kiss in the garden.”
His gaze darkened. “What do you want from me, my Queen?”
The addition of the word my sent a thrill down your spine.
“You,” you said, knowing how true it was.
You wanted every part of the man before you. Wanted to know him, breathe him in, drink from his cup and bask in his light. The man who’d known you were his mate and hadn’t claimed you, but rather waited. Waited you to come to him.
Rising on your tiptoes, your hands slid to his neck and you kissed him again.
You kept your pressure light, the opposite of the searing kiss you’d previously shared. Pulling away, you savored the press of his chest, the warmth of his body and the weight of his hands. When you opened your eyes, you found Jungkook smiling.
Pressing your lips to his again, you moved a bit closer. Jungkook seemed content just to kiss, trading gentle pressure – until you pulled back, teeth catching on his lower lip.
A growl loosened from his chest, low and primal.
Sliding a hand behind your neck, Jungkook tilted your head upward and waited for you to nod. When you did, he crushed your lips to his in a kiss equally fierce as it was possessive. Breath stolen, you gave him your desire and what was left of your heart.
Warmth flooded your veins, heating you from the inside out. With limbs of molten fire, you kissed him back until his tongue swiped at your lip, demanding entrance. You parted easily for him, a whimper leaving your throat as you melded together.
Jungkook groaned, pulling close to kiss you again. His fingers traced the skin at your nape, trailing your spine to firmly cup your ass. Nestled between his legs, Jungkook allowed you to feel every inch of his hardness.
Your skin was aflame, as though lightning had zipped across it. Reduced to only sensations, you shivered at each one you felt. His thumb, fondling the dip of your waist. Your nipples, turgid against the fabric of your gown. The sharp, aching pulse which steadily grew between your thighs.
“Oh,” you gasped, head tipping back.
Jungkook kissed each inch of exposed skin you gave him.
“Is this what you want?” he murmured.
“What I want, my King,” you panted, regaining some of yourself. “Is for you not to stop.”
Lips curved in a smile, he lifted his head. “I rather think your King is more appropriate, no?”
You arced a brow. “What is the difference?”
“One implies you are my subject and the other implies I belong to you.”
“And which do you prefer?”
His gaze glinted in firelight. “Allow me to show you, my Queen.”
Barely pausing, you breathed, “And which usage was that?”
With a soft sort of chuckle, Jungkook walked you both backwards until your spine hit the wall. Bending his head, he brushed his lips against yours until you were aching. Until your need for him became fire, racing through your veins in a silent demand.
Sliding his thigh between your legs, Jungkook paused when you gasped. Swiftly giving in, he covered your lips in a kiss which seared to your soul.
Slipping your hands higher, you marveled at the breadth of his torso. Years of riding had hardened his body, making you wonder what he looked like beneath the tunic.
One hand on the wall, Jungkook’s other fisted in your skirts as he tugged you closer. Sharply, you inhaled when he yanked up the fabric, exposing your knee to the gentle press of his thumb. A moan left your lips as your head hit the wall, eyes fluttering open.
Jungkook stopped. “Is it too much?” he asked, releasing your skirts.
“No.” You shook your head. “I want more. I want you”
His gaze darkened. “Then you shall have me,” he promised, covering your mouth with his.
His kiss was rough, lips bruising as your hands found his hair. Arching against him, you reveled in the hard panes of his body. It seemed wherever you had space, Jungkook had been made to fill it.
Hand in your skirts once again, Jungkook pulled them higher to press his thigh in between. You inhaled at the contact, his muscles rigid and hard in all the right places.
Before you could do anything else, Jungkook bent and grasped the back of your thighs. Wrapping you around his waist, he kept your body close as he walked towards the bed. Lowering you to the floor, his hands remained on your waist.
“Turn around,” Jungkook rasped, and you obeyed.
Facing the bed, you felt his fingers trace over the bodice of your gown.
“May I?” he asked, his voice shaky.
“Please,” you whispered.
Carefully, Jungkook began undoing the laces and hooks. As the fabric was loosened, exposing your skin to his gaze, you closed your eyes. His fingers skimmed your shoulders, sliding the fabric lower until it hit the floor.
Bared to his gaze, you felt your breath hitch. Cool air played over your skin, perking your breasts, and drifting between your thighs. The gown was sheer enough to necessitate you wore no undergarments beneath it, leaving you naked before him.
“Y/N.” Jungkook sounded hoarse. “Please… please face me.”
Slowly, you did so as you opened your eyes.
Jungkook stared, his eyes dark as night. Jaw tense, his gaze slowly dragged down your body. You felt the intimacy of it as he trailed your throat, lingered at your breasts, your ass, and between your thighs.
When he finally returned to your face, the heat between you was scorching. Throat parched, your body felt one with the fire.
“Now, you,” you murmured.
Without looking away, Jungkook lifted a hand to begin undoing his tunic. Once it was loose, he pulled this overhead in a single motion. As it hit the floor, his hands went to his trousers. With bated breath, you watched him remove the laces.
Swallowing once, you stared at his chest bathed in soft firelight. Swirling dark lines stretched across his shoulder, encircling his bicep, and traveling to his wrist. You saw words and symbols but had no time to peruse. Later, you promised yourself. Later, you’d worship the ink with your lips and tongue.
A dark smattering of hair trailed from his abs, disappearing into trousers he undid with deft fingers. Once these had been pushed to the floor, you found another reason to swallow.
You were not what anyone would call shy, but something about this felt more intimate than it ever had. Baring yourself to Jungkook meant more than just sex. You’d accepted the bond, accepted what lay between you and acknowledged him as your mate.
Seeming to understand, Jungkook took a step closer as he bent his head. His hands slid to your waist and he kissed you gently.
When he pulled away, you saw vulnerability in his gaze.
“Y/N,” he said.
You marveled at the sound of his name on your lips. “Jungkook,” you returned, and watched him smile.
Bending again, his lips found yours as his hands skimmed your body. You settled between his legs, feeling slightly light-headed from the press of so much skin. Jungkook’s hand slid lower, gripping one of your thighs to wrap around him. He gave the same treatment to the other, twisting you around to lay on the bed.
Pressing a knee to the mattress, Jungkook crawled forward and bent his head. Lips soft, he began to kiss down your body. Your hands gripped his back, trailing to find the twin dimples nestled at the base of his spine.
When Jungkook’s mouth brushed your breasts, he paused. Instead of giving in and devouring you whole, he slid a hand between your thighs and found how wet you were. Gaze lidded, he looked up as he cupped your sex. A single finger slid over your silken entrance.
Lifting the same finger to his lips, Jungkook leisurely tasted you. When he pulled his finger out, you saw it had been licked clean.
Growling in approval, Jungkook bent and closed his lips over your breast.
“Oh,” you gasped, arching beneath him.
Your nipple was already hard, peaked with desire. Jungkook sucked on it eagerly, pulling your breast taut before he raised his head. Moving on to the next, his thumb remained behind to skim over your nipple.
He continued with this sweet torture until you’d had enough.
“No more,” you gasped, curving a hand beneath his jaw.
Releasing your breast, he lifted his head. “I want to taste you,” Jungkook breathed. “I want to know what it’s like to have you fall apart on my tongue.”
Easing yourself onto your elbows, you slowly spread your legs.
“Do your worst, Your Majesty,” you said, gaze glinting.
Jungkook grinned, lowering himself to the sheets. His mouth was hot, open as he kissed your waist, your belly and lower. You did not know where to look – his entirely naked ass, or his dark head of hair before your dripping sex.
Dragging his nose up your thigh, Jungkook deeply inhaled as he centered himself. Lowering his head to your sex, he gave a tentative kiss. Even this sent a sweeping shudder through you. It took nearly everything you had not to moan like a maiden in heat.
Opening his mouth, his tongue swirled once and you nearly dissolved. Liquid heat pulsed through you, cumulating between your thighs in a sinful wave. Worshipping you with his tongue, Jungkook tore moans from your lips, one after the other.
Swiping his tongue in another slow circle, he coaxed your body to arc from the bed. With a throaty chuckle, Jungkook looked up. Hair mussed and lips wet, he looked like something divine.
“Do you want more, my Queen?” he asked lowly.
“Yes,” you exhaled, unable to look away.
A devious smile spread across his lips. Lowering his mouth, Jungkook resumed his ministrations until you were gasping his name.
“Oh,” you groaned, broken as he continued to eat you out.
Gripping your thighs, he pushed them further apart to better get at your sex. Legs splayed on the bed, you framed his broad shoulders as you reached for his hair. Another growl left him as you fisted your hand in the strands. Hips rising and falling with the motion of his mouth, your head fell limply back on the bed.
“Yes – yes,” you said, chasing the sweet pleasure with your hips.
You hardly knew what you were doing as you moved, never having felt this way before. Jungkook seemed equally entranced, his eyes snapping open to meet yours above. The bottom half of his face was wet with your juices and while you should have felt modest, instead you felt righteousness. Intoxication. Possession.
This was your body which made him look like this, half-feral with need as he ground into the mattress. “Yes,” you gasped, gripping harder as your legs started to shake. “Yes, Jungkook.”
Pleasure built from within, threatening to drown out everything but the man between your thighs. Slipping a finger to your entrance, Jungkook drew lazy circles over your sex. His tongue moved in quick, agile motions against your swollen clit.
“Come for me,” he panted, lifting his head.
Your lips parted when his finger slipped in. Gripping his hair, your hips bucked against him as he added another and curled. Crying out his name, you came hard and fast around his hand. You think you said Jungkook, amongst other things, as you went limp on the mattress, your hands falling to the sheets.
Jungkook slowly relented, gently kissing your hip, your chest and all the way up your throat. Smiling softly, he settled beside you to drape an arm over your waist. Chest rising and falling, you stared at him in wonder.
You’d often wondered what the mating bond felt like. If something would snap into place and all of a sudden, your mind would belong to someone else. Whatever you’d imagined, it had not been this. This felt as natural, as right as when you flew.
Tracing a circle on your inner thigh, Jungkook looked up. “Do you want more?”
His other hand parted your legs, cupping your heat to show you what he meant. Inhaling softly, you reached down and encircled his wrist with your hand. Jungkook went still.
“Yes,” you murmured. “But not like that.”
His eyes lightened. “How, then?”
“I want all of you. Inside me,” you said. “I take the potions monthly.”
The potions were a trio of liquids sold by most apothecaries throughout the continent. They did everything from preventing pregnancy to protecting against diseases and easing your monthly flow. Arching a brow, you glanced pointedly at the headboard.
Smiling softly, Jungkook retracted his hand. Pushing himself upwards, he shifted to seat himself against the same headboard.
You could not have imagined a more beautiful sight. With mussed hair, his skin dark with ink and flushed with arousal, Jungkook was artwork himself. Lifting yourself to your knees, you positioned yourself over his thighs and lowered your gaze.
His cock was impressive, although you had already known this. He would be the largest you’d ever taken, that was for certain.
Reaching down, you wrapped your hand gently around him. Gaze half-lidded, Jungkook stared as you dragged your hand upwards. A hiss left his lips, though he held himself back.
“Careful,” he warned, shifting his hips.
Brushing your thumb across his head, you spread already-leaking fluids down his hardened shaft. Lowering your body, your mouth slid over the reddening tip. With a flick of your tongue, you relished his soft moan of approval. Next, was a swirl, before you slid off with a pop and began to move your fist.
“This is not your first time,” Jungkook observed, breathing heavily.
“Neither is it yours, Your Majesty.”
Bending again, you took him all at once in your mouth. Gasping his chuckle, Jungkook’s hands skimmed your torso to land on your rear. For a while, the only sounds which filled the room were the sloppy sounds of you sucking.
“It is not,” he panted, fingers digging into your ass. “And yet, I cannot help but be envious of all who came before me. Of all who’ve known the sweet pleasure of your lips on their cock.”
Removing him from your mouth, you looked up.
“There is no need to be jealous,” you said, rising onto your knees. Not looking away, you swung a leg over his hips. “You are the one who has me now.”
Something proud, almost territorial entered his gaze.
Gripping you by the waist, Jungkook pulled you even closer. “Do I?” he murmured, lips brushing your throat. “My Queen. My betrothed. My mate,” he breathed, nipping the skin.
A not unpleasant shiver ran down your spine. Reaching beneath you, you gripped his cock to position at your dripping entrance. Still, you did not take him inside.
Realizing Jungkook awaited an answer, you nodded. He had you.
“Then tell me,” Jungkook demanded, looking into your eyes.
Lowering yourself, you felt his tip brush your entrance. “You have me,” you whispered. “My King. My betrothed. My mate.”
With each word, you took him in deeper. Jungkook sat upright, right hand cupping the back of your neck to bring you closer. Clasped to his warm, damp skin, you sank down on his cock.
“That’s it,” he murmured, hot in your ear. Other hand gripping your ass, he lowered you even further. “You can take more of me, can you not?”
You could and you did, not wanting to wait any longer. Hands digging into his back, you kept your chests pressed together as you sank even further. No matter how much you took, there always seemed to be more to give. Jungkook’s cock stretched you open, making you work to fit all of him inside.
“Oh,” you whimpered, gripping him tighter.
Jungkook grunted and stroked the side of your neck with his thumb. “There you go. Take all of it. All of me,” he exhaled.
A now-familiar shiver swept your spine as you moved. The last inch pushed you past your limits, but finally you felt him bottom out. For a moment, you could not breathe from the feeling of fullness. Of rightness. Of completeness.
Him sheathed inside you felt indescribable, only improved when Jungkook shifted his hips and finally moved.
“Oh,” you gasped, eyes flying wide.
“Y/N,” he groaned.
Lifting yourself higher, your nipples brushed his chest as you eased yourself down. Jungkook’s hand remained on your spine, rolling your hips as he thrust from below. Kissing him slowly, you bit down on his lip and took him in deeper.
Jungkook began to move, spearing you with his cock as you spread your legs. His kisses became harder, more desperate as a steady thrum of power built in between you. Soon it was your hips chasing his, not the other way around.
Lowering his head, Jungkook caught your breast with his mouth. Lips parting, you began to fuck him harder as you slammed your hips down. His tongue teased one rounded breast, switching to the other while his thumb flicked the first.
Dropping onto his length over and over, you marveled at the feel of him moving inside you.
“Jungkook,” you moaned, head thrown back in ecstasy.
His hands seemed to be everywhere. Clasping you to him, skimming your torso, flicking your pebbled nipples as the wave of pleasure built. Toes curling beneath you, you panted from the effort of trying not to come.
As though he could sense this, Jungkook began speeding up. Clasping you to him, he thrust into you harder, filling you with each languid roll of his hips. As your lips found each other, the strange tide of longing crested into a wave.
Winding your fingers into his hair, you tipped your head back and bared your neck to his teeth. Jungkook scraped them up your throat, whining his approval as you rode his cock. Hands gripping your ass hard enough to bruise, his hips moved even faster as he sought completion.
With his dampened skin pressed to yours, his scent began to envelop. Each moan he gave you was freely taken. Each sound you made, he swallowed whole. You were not sure how long you existed in this state, simply reveling in the pleasure from each other’s bodies.
On the edge of release, you felt the bond between you tighten. It was difficult to tell where one of you ended and the other began. Slamming your hips down to his, Jungkook was equally fierce, plunging inside you.
“I cannot hold on much longer,” he gasped.
You nodded, stroking his temple with a sweat-slicked thumb. “Together.”
Jungkook nodded, lips seeking yours in a question you answered. Hips quickening, limbs tightening, you let yourself fall into the release he offered. As you came undone, it was Jungkook you held onto. Somewhere within the bright haze of your pleasure, you felt Jungkook release as well. Thick, hot spurts of cum painted your insides white. 
You reveled in it, trembling at the idea of a future where he’d do this again. Where he’d whet you with his seed, stuffing you full in the hopes you might bear his child. The notion made you whimper, squeezing with your walls as you felt him begin to leak out. 
Although your breathing slowed, the haze of joy lingered. The mating bond became almost visible, shining crystal-clear in what had previously been darkness. It stayed with you; humming and golden, and fearfully strong.
Lifting your head, you met Jungkook’s gaze.
He had not become someone different. Neither had you and yet, something between you had changed. It was still Jungkook beneath you, inside you and with his arms wrapped around you. Now though, you knew what he was to you. Your mate. You had chosen him, and he had chosen you.
Based on his expression, you knew he felt something similar.
One of your hands slid down his chest and settled over his heart. Beneath your palm and warm skin, you felt his heart keeping pace with yours.
“Oh,” you murmured, eyes shining.
Leaning forward, Jungkook brushed your lips with his. Clasping your hand in between you, he rested his forehead to yours.
You knew obstacles lay ahead. You knew but somehow, they all seemed more possible with him by your side. With him as your partner, your mate, your betrothed.
Opening your eyes, you met his gaze and smiled.
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© kpopfanfictrash, 2021. Do not copy or repost without permission.
Author’s Note: Thank you so much to everyone read this long! I hope you enjoyed :)
Character Ask Game found here
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taesinferno · 10 days ago
aren't we all sinners? | jjk
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✠ SUMMARY | ghosts in a church was as normal as sinners in a confessional. so normal, you didn't bat an eyelash when the local ghostbusters were called in yet again for another job. what did bat your eyelash, though, was one ghostbuster in particular. and he was about to find out just how a confession works.
✠ PAIRING | ghostbusters!jungkook × virgin nun!reader
✠ RATE | 18+
✠ GENRE | supernatural, religious, sacrilege, smut
✠ WARNINGS | sacrilege! , breaking religious vows, defiling of religious areas, misuse of a cross, corruption, loss of virginity, penetration with foreign object, unprotected penetrative sex, oral f!recieving, dirty talk, begging, slight tears, guilt, shame, internal dilemmas
✠ WC | 7.4k
✠ A/N | another religious jk fic ! literally both of them have been so random and impulsive its funny to see it happen twice 😭
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⇢ For the Namkook Moonrise Masquerade Collaboration hosted by @jamaisjoons
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"Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been only days since my last confession but I can no longer defend the egregious nature of my actions. I can't justify these thoughts that I've been plagued with. Ever since… our last ghost…"
You had rushed to the confessional in a hurry, heart thudding faster in your chest as you aimed to reach sanctuary with haste. You slammed the door of the small space shut behind you, panting with short breath as you tried to relieve your anxieties. He was back. Here. Again. You thought you'd be able to contain yourself this time, you urged yourself, pleaded with yourself and your beating chest to relax, and remember your vows when you caught sight of him. You implored yourself to think of your god, your lord and saviour, the one who you were truly married to in religious matrimony. You prayed and prayed. Since the last time he came. For your god to give you the strength to stop seeing his face, his charming smile, everytime you closed your eyes. You begged, on your knees, with your hands clasped and your eyes screwed shut, for your mind to stop conjuring up scenarios with him. To stop imagining how his hands would feel in yours, how his embrace would wrap around and protect you. How sweet a kiss would be—It was impiety! Desecration of everything you hold dear to your heart! You were on the verge of falling to sin, if your thoughts hadn't already granted you a seat in hell. Burning in those flames with all those lustful disbelievers. It's what you deserved. Your impure thoughts clouding the mind that should only be thinking of your vows. Your religious duty. The one you swore to.
“Bless me, Father. I am crushed under the weight of my sins and I can no longer bear these impurities raging inside me. I need to beg for the Lord's forgiveness and hope he will have mercy on my soul.” You took a deep, shaky breath. You were about to confess one of the greatest sins you had ever committed after taking your religious vows. Right to the man who spoke to god. Confession was confidential. Of course it was. But it wouldn’t stop the searing shame washing over you as the pious man acknowledged your sins. You knew he’d never see you the same way again. You’d never be the same person, not in the eyes of god. Forever blemished with specks on your soiled soul.
“There has been an abundance of the unrested ghosts recently. Those who struggle to cross the barrier between this life and the next,” you started hesitantly. Information he already knew. He’d been the direct communication between the ghosts, after all. You cleared your throat. “The ghostbusters that have been arriving. I’m afraid…” Your heart felt like it was in your throat, pushing away at the barriers of your skin. Like an embodiment of your sin, raging to tell everyone of your deepest desires.
You rubbed your clammy hands together. Your soul needed to be absolved. You couldn’t go on living like this. This was in direct contradiction to everything you had learned, to everything you stood for. You had to beg for forgiveness. Now. Before it was too late. Before you crossed the threshold between salvageable and lost. Before you became damned, for good. “I-I’m afraid I’ve been having thoughts about one of the men, father.” A beat. Silence from his end. The sweat trickled down your brow, creating an anxious itch. “Unholy thoughts…Thoughts I can’t control. I’m afraid the devil’s in me.”
He didn’t say a word. Resolute silence greeted your words, confirming your worst fears. The judgement flooded through the small wall separating the confessional, the lack of words speaking volumes. You suddenly felt too hot in your clothes, struggling to sit still and not tear off the head covering sitting heavily on your head. You panicked, but you had to continue. Otherwise, what hope was there for you? The deed was done, the priest was told. Now, you needed to repent. You needed your penance to save yourself. To wipe your slate clean and start anew, with the lord’s guidance to keep you away from impurity.
“I think of him… in my bed. Jeon Jungkook. The one with the… piercing…” you gulped. As if you could pick a worse man to occupy your mind. Not that he was in any way evil, of course. Jungkook was the kindest man you’d ever met. Extremely charming with the humor to match. He was always greeting you with that big smile, raising a hand in a wave as he passed you by in the corridors. He was consistently sweet to everyone, your convent’s dog running straight to him everytime he entered. You didn’t think there was a more pure adult in the world than the innocently endearing man that pouted in concentration as he was loading up his machine. Not to mention, the man was strikingly handsome. A fact that rarely went unnoticed. The way all eyes would turn to him as he walked by, women lifting their gaze off their prayer books to follow his stride. He was obnoxiously unaware, of course. He was only here to do his job. Still, your heart didn’t hesitate to do a little cartwheel everytime he found you and struck up a conversation. And for all his heavenly traits, Jeon Jungkook was the embodiment of sin. And your priest knew, if a woman mentioned him, what kind of indulgences they were seeking. You must’ve reeked with shame at this point.
“He occupies my every thought, Father. I see his eyes when I close mine, I hear his laugh and the rhythm of his voice when I fall into dreams. Father, I-” You shut your eyes, “I think about his hands…” you whisper, “how they would feel… in places I’ve never felt before.” You heard a sharp gasp from the booth next to you, but you could barely hear it. For you couldn’t continue, your heart beat so loudly. You shook your head. This was a mistake. You should’ve never spoken your crimes out loud, you should’ve never placed such a heavy burden on the priest. The burden of forgiving your actions. You should’ve found strength within you. Not go running to the lord at every transgress and plead for him to forgive you-
“Tell me.”
The voice next to you. He finally spoke. As startled as you were, your internal trainwreck being put on a temporary halt, a certain weight lifted off your chest. Not all the weight, but a small piece. To know you still had a chance with god. To know your priest wanted to help absolve you of your sins, wanted to guide you on your path to forgiveness. It gave you the courage to continue.
“I-I had a dream the other night.” Your heart thudded as you recalled the fateful memory. It must have been that moment, the last time he was here. The way he’d brushed up against you as you walked the halls, showing him to the room where you saw the ghost last. The way he’d made you laugh at an impression of his boss, deepening his voice and furrowing his brows to the full effect. The way he’d pushed you up against the wall suddenly, hand around your waist as he hissed in your ear to stay quiet. You were holding your breath, scared to move. For you hadn’t seen the ghost ravaging a mere few feet from where you were headed, right before Jungkook snatched you from harm’s way and hid you in a corridor, with his body as your shield. You had wondered if he could hear your heartbeat. It was deafening to you.
You still remembered the way he’d shot the ghost with rock salt, deterring it from coming any closer and sending it screeching off to another end of the large building. The look he’d give you when he asked if you were alright. The lingering gaze, the way he’d traced your features as he held onto you a moment too long. A hint of a smirk on his face as if he knew what he was doing.
“In the dream, he-he touched me, Father. His mouth found mine in lustful passion, he traced maps on my skin with his fingers, exploring every inch. His lips set fire to every inch he grazed, trailing down my fiery bosom. I’d never known such pleasure, as I imagined he would give me. H-his hands, Father, they…” Your face heated, “he pushed them into my sacred chastity. He defiled me in my dream, Father. And it felt so good. I longed for it. Night after night, I rolled around my empty bed sheets. Praying for the same dream to come to me again. Just for a taste of sin. I-I wanted it. Would have done anything for it.”
You would have cried with shame. You would have fallen down to your knees and wept for your treachery, praying that the angels on your shoulder turned away at the lustful deeds you partook in. The way you’d lie back on your bed, nightgown covering your entire body. Your hand would sneak under the cotton material, eyes screwed shut as you found the source of your suffering. Explored your body for the first time with your hand, shaking as you nudged the little bundle of nerves that caused you so much heartache. Keeping his face in your mind, imagining his weight falling on your body. Feeling him pressed against your skin, with his fingers tucked in between your legs. You drew harsher circles against your clit, sweat beading on the surface of your skin as your body was set alight with desire. Tiny moans falling from your lips, whimpers as you felt the ghost of his lips over yours. Those beautiful pink lips. Curved into that cocky smirk. You felt your hand dip into a wetness, fingers soon becoming soaked with the arousal dripping from your core. You pushed your body further into the mattress, experimenting with the boundaries of your hole. Oh. Your finger slid right into your cunt, so easily in your ardor. You’d heard his voice drifting in your ear. Thinking of the way his hot breath would feel, a nip to your earlobe as he’d whisper. Go on, pretty angel. Cum for me. Your body writhed in your sheets, twisting and turning as you reached your climax. Your hand flew to your mouth, muffling your longing moans as you imagined his face at the height of your orgasm. His twinkling eyes as he winked at you deviously. And then it was gone, and you were left alone in your room once more. A cold breeze chilling your skin fraught with sweat, the puddle of arousal mocking you as evidence of what you had just done. Your breathing filled the room, heavy pants and tears in your eyes. The cross hanging on the wall that usually brought you such comfort glared harshly at you. Lord, what had you done? What would you repeat doing for the next couple nights?
“At first, it was only glimpses in my sleep. When I’d first met him. He appeared as a distant face, someone I barely recognized. Now, he claims my mind, my body, my soul. I fear he is the devil. For I have been corrupted with longing by his mere presence. I seek your guidance, Father. I beg the lord will find it in his heart to forgive me. Please, I-I,” your voice broke, “I have nothing else to hold dear but my devotion to my religion. I need your penance, Father. So I can leave the devil behind and move on with my chaste life.” But your words are only met with silence. You must have stunned the priest into quietude. Either that, or he had a heart attack upon hearing your recital.
“Father...I seek your guidance.” You felt your chest tighten with emotion. “Father?”
Jungkook was stunned. Shook beyond words as he stood there, frozen, while you bore your heart to who you thought was the priest on the other side of the thin wall. He felt guilty, sweat beading at his forehead, at the idea of listening to your innermost thoughts. When you’d first enter the confessional in a hurry, he heard the loud scrape of the door as you locked yourself in. Huffing breaths as hushed words fell rapidly from your lips. He was only checking the radioactive activity in the small room, by orders from his boss. Apparently, the ghost had been hanging around and eavesdropping on confessions. But by the time you’d started to pour your heart out, it was too late for him to make an escape. He’d already heard you admit to a sin of impure thoughts, there’s no way he could reveal himself then. You’d be disgraced, ashamed. He couldn’t do that to you. No, the only thing to do was to let you rant. To preserve your pride and keep your head held high. What’s the worst thing that could come out of your mouth?
Turns out, sexual fantasies about him. That’s what.
At first, he felt guilty. Then, you spoke his name. You started to detail all the things you wanted him to do to you. All the places you wanted him to touch, where you wanted his tongue, his hands… Jungkook liked to think he was a good man. Maybe not the most religious, but certainly not the worst. But would good men be sweating in a confessional, head tilted back and eyes closed in agony as his cock ached in his jeans? Would good men start palming themselves through their pants, imagining you under him in the way you so sweetly and shakily described? Would good men look at you the way he did every time he walked into the convent, sneakily stealing glances and looks, always coming up with reasons to talk to you. Just to hear your dainty voice, your pretty laugh. Would good men imagine ripping off that damn chaste outfit off your body, just to have you writhing in pleasure beneath him? Just for a taste of your sweet juices?
God, how he felt dirty. Dirty and stained with impiety. His thoughts were clouding his judgement, like stains on his hands. It was some kind of sin to be thinking about you, let alone to get off to you. He was sure about that. But in a church no less?? Yeah. Jungkook probably had just earned himself a one-way ticket to hell. But he couldn’t care less. Not when your voice spoke out loud the tension he knew there was between you. Not when you confirmed you wanted this just as much as he did. That eased his guilt a bit. Just enough to goad you to continue. “Tell me.”
Your small voice drifted through the wall, dripping in shame, with a hint of longing and lust coating the edges. Jungkook had to constantly remind himself to keep quiet, biting back groans as your story continued. He almost didn’t hear you finish, too busy in a haze of desire and daydream to realize you were asking for penance. From the priest you thought he was.
Fuck. What was it that priests say? “Say three hail Marys and repent, for our lord and saviour is… merciful (?).” Yeah. That sounded about right. Breathing out a sigh of relief at the end of this tortuous confession. Fuck, maybe now he could go home and shower. He desperately needed to cleanse himself of whatever just took place here.
But the other side of the wall was too quiet. He hadn’t heard the shut of the door, signaling your exit from your side of the confessional. When he listened, he was surprised to hear your breathing through the wall. “... Was there something else, my child?”
A small gasp escaped you. You must have slapped your palm over your mouth because your voice suddenly became muffled. But he heard you, alright. Loud and clear. “I-It’s you. Holy-” You stopped yourself before you could do more damage to your rotten soul. His heart dropped to his ass. Gathering your bearings, Jungkook heard a loud thud as your door was slammed open, rushed footsteps carrying you out and away from him. Fuck.
“Wait!” he swung the door open, looking around for you wildly. Swinging his head in the direction he thought he’d heard you go in. But you were nowhere to be found. Shit. Of course, you knew the covenant like the back of your hand. If you wanted a quick escape route, strangers to the building didn’t stand a chance.
Lucky for him, though, Jungkook was no stranger.
He spotted the doorway he thought you'd disappeared through, hustling and hot on your trail. Barging through the wooden door, loud clang announcing his arrival in the corridor, he was just in time to catch your long dress disappearing behind a wall.
He chased after you, "Yn! Please wait!" But as he rounded the corner, all he got was a slammed door in his face. "Yn, please." He lifted his hand to a tentative knock, barely aware of your heavy breathing on the other side of the door. “Please, darling, open the door.”
“Go away.” He heard that loud and clear. Your sweet voice, trying to sound determined and stern, but dripping in anguish and shame. God, how he wished to be able to take that pain away. He knew it was his fault. He should’ve never been listening to your innermost thoughts. He should’ve announced his presence and stopped you from spilling your guts the moment you’d stepped into that confessional. And he’d tell you as much. Except, there was a small part of him, once he’d heard your tattered voice, that urged him to stay and listen. There was always a devil on his shoulder, egging him on in his charade and convincing him you couldn’t possibly say anything so damning. You were married to the lord, after all. Even though all he wanted to hear from you was those words you’d spoken so worriedly.
“I’m sorry. I never should have pretended I was the priest.” He called out to you, unsure if you could even hear him. “I know how private confession is supposed to be. And I was gonna get out of there, I swear! But then… I heard you mention my name and… well…” He took a deep breath, missing yours hitching on the other side of the door. “I know I shouldn’t have even heard those words, let alone like them. But, yn, you don’t understand how long I’ve been dreaming about those same things.” His confession was met with silence. He sighed, bowing his head.
“W-why?” Your tiny voice broke through the wood. His head shot up, leaning closer to the door, one hand holding his weight against the wall.
“I-I… well… I don’t really know how to explain why.” He rubbed the back of his neck, “I mean, without offending you, of course.”
“I won’t be offended.”
Jungkook’s head shot up in surprise at your voice. “Right, well. I heard your innermost thoughts. Seems only fair you hear my confession, too.” His heart beat louder in his chest. For a moment, he thought a ghost might have possessed him. But his radioactive scanner wasn’t going haywire. Must’ve just been a poor bastard’s nerves causing his large palms to create enough sweat to rehydrate an entire desert. He wiped his hands on his jeans and cleared his throat. “Forgive me, yn, for I have sinned. I’ve thought about you in an inappropriate way more times than I can count. From the moment I saw you, actually. I remember the first time we laughed together, it was when Sister Lena tripped over the pew. Remember?”
He didn’t hear the tiny giggle you let out at the memory.
“I remember thinking it was the most beautiful sound I’d ever heard. I don’t understand it, really. It’s like you have some kind of hold on me and I can’t shake it, no matter how hard I’ve tried. It’s ironic when you think about it. I hunt and rid people of ghost possession for a living, yet I can’t rid myself of you. I remind myself of your duties and promises, of your devotion to your religion. I try to equate you with God, and the saviour. That only backfires. Now, in my mind, my devotion is only to you. I picture your face when I think of religion, and I fear hell now, for it will not have you in it.”
“I-I picture your body when I think of heaven.” He let out a shaky breath. This is it. “I can’t stop imagining you under me, all the things I could do to you. All the ways you would scream my name. The way you would writhe as I bring you to your peak with only my mouth, or my fingers. The way you’d look when you came all over my cock after I fuck your pretty pussy open. I can only see your face when I touch myself, a halo over your head, reminding me of the angel you are, and the sinner I am.” He bowed his head in defeat. You were never gonna look at him again after this. What was he thinking, suggesting telling you his filthy thoughts? You didn’t want to hear that shit. “I’m sorry, yn, but it’s true.”
He leaned back, letting the door creak at the loss of his weight against it. Staring at the blank, empty, silent wood. Is this what confession was like? He wouldn’t know, he’d never been. But people always spoke of such a freeing feeling when they’d leave. All he felt was a heavier weight on his shoulders, one he’d have to learn to carry every time he stepped foot back in the convent.
He turned away from your rejection, ready to leave you and any thoughts of you behind. Whatever it took. He didn’t expect the door to swing wide open, or your small voice breathing out, “But… aren’t we all sinners?”
He turned back to see you peeking out of your room. You'd removed your wimple. Were you allowed to do that? Didn't matter, since you looked ethereal. You stood up straight, clearly catching his stubborn gaze on you. "Jeon Jungkook, I absolve you of your sins." Your small voice spoke hushed, rapid. "Your penance is to enter my room… and repent. Until your sins are forgiven."
He finally met your eyes, ears red from your words as he snapped out of his sheepish state. There. Your eyes held truth, no trace of any false statements. Your true intentions were evident. Willing, almost begging, to be at his mercy. The way you were looking at him, with want in your eyes. He didn’t care how sacrilegious it was, defiling a servant of god. He didn’t care if he would burn in hell for his blasphemy. He followed that gaze, taking large strides over to you to gently cup your face in his hands. His breathing was heavy in anticipation as was yours. Would you really let him do this?
“Please,” you whispered, leaning into his touch. He felt your soft hands touch his biceps, slowly pulling him to follow in step as you backed into your room. “I want this, Jungkook. You must believe me.” Your eyes searched his shyly at your confession, waiting with bated breath.
“Oh, I believe you, yn.” He pulled you close, pressing his forehead against yours. His lips were so close you could almost taste them. His warm breath on your skin. “ Forgive me, Lord. For I am about to sin—” He caught your lips in a passionate kiss, breathing in deep to fill his lungs with your air. Pushing you until your back hit the stony wall, digging into your skin as he trapped you with his passion. You grabbed at him with desperate hands, wrapping around the back of his thin shirt. Whatever material was fisted easily in your hands, stretching easily with the way you were clawing it down his shoulders. He gave you a moment to breathe, drawing back to meet your lust-blown eyes. His were darker, heavy breaths fanning your face as he ran his eyes down your face. But there was something softer in them; something that showed the gentleness of this giant man, below the surface of his rough exterior.
He dragged you down into the depths of hell with him, his soft touch leading you down the path of thorns you were bound on. You couldn’t care less as your back hit the mattress; all your senses could feel at that moment was him. Your mind clouded with the taste of his lips, the touch of his hands roaming your body, the way he stole your breath away as he pulled away, assertively making you his with a smack of his lips against yours. “Mm,” his hands trailed down to push your dress up, the holy fabric once protecting you completely useless at his touch. He found his way in between your legs, exploring the wetness of your heat through your thick panties. “Soaked. Just like you confessed, angel. Good girl.” He nuzzled your neck with his words, placing wet, open-mouthed kisses wherever he went.
His angel. That’s what he’d called you. An angel. A creature made of pure light created to only do good in this world at the command of god. What you should strive to be. A creature capable of doing no wrong; strong soldiers of god doing holy work, their purity and goodness above any levels a puny human could ever reach. How could he compare you to them, when he had you lying here underneath him, legs open and begging for him to touch you in your sacred place? How could he compare you to a saint when all you wanted was to fall into the debts of debauchery with him; when all you wanted was him to show you how to sin, how to please him, how to go so far past the line that those holy saints would never find you?
Lost in your thoughts, your gaze wandered subconsciously to the wall mirroring the door. And there it was. Burning a hole into you, about to burst into flame. Your holy cross. Hanging tediously on the wall as if it was hanging by a thread, swinging in warning before you went too far, and truly lost yourself. It stared at you menacingly, judgingly. Reminding you of who you were, your promises, your vows. To serve your god, and only him. To stay true to your values. To serve as a pillar of a sacred society. It was a witness to your acts, waiting to serve testimony at the end of time on judgement day, so you may be punished for your sins.
Your blood suddenly ran cold with fear as the small symbol took over your body, the power it held over you cumbersome, but towering. What were you doing? How could you lose your senses so easily, a lapse in judgement at the wink of an eye from the man above you? Your body was frozen in shock, unable to process the guilt and horror you felt. But also unable to push him away, to deny what you truly wanted; what your body craved. You couldn’t, not when he was making you feel so good. When he was giving you everything you’ve been missing for all the years of your life, having dedicated yourself to god the moment you turned of age. You’d never felt sensations like this before. And god, did he know what he was doing. He turned you dizzy with just his mouth, you couldn’t imagine how anything else would feel…
But you couldn’t.
Jungkook must have noticed your dilemma when he paused to scan your pensive face. Pulling back from his quest in trying to mark up all the supple skin he could find, his big eyes flashed with worry. “What’s wrong? Do you wanna stop?”
“No,” you were quick to answer, but you felt a pang of guilt in your chest. Your eyes drifted over to the cross hanging on your wall. Watching you. Judging you.
Jungkook followed your gaze, finding the source of your worries. He looked back at you, then at the cross again. It took him a minute, bless his heart, but he realized your strife. “What are you worried about? That little thing?” You nodded hesitantly, avoiding his eyes and trying to look anywhere else for fear of judgement. You landed on his chest instead. He tracked your gaze, tilting your head up to meet a playful smirk on teasing his lips. “It’s not going to hurt you, you know.”
“I know, but…” your hands fiddled with the strings of your dress, anxiety causing a slight tremble in your body.
Jungkook understood your feelings without your explanations. He wordlessly got up from your bed, leaving you with a sense of emptiness without his weight over your body. You watched his every move with horrified guilt; he was going to leave. You’d led him on, only to disappoint him. It was your fault, playing Jezebel. But he didn’t want to have anything to do with your unsteady emotions. Why would he?
He moved across the room to face the cross that was causing you so much agony and internal affliction. He watched it for a minute before reaching and dislodging it from its protected position. It looked so small in his large hands, almost benign. He turned it over, inspecting it. Before walking back over to you. “See, darling?” He turned it around to you, displaying it in his hand. “It’s totally harmless.”
He was so cute. Smiling hopefully with a hand held out to you, desperate to prove your fears were nothing to be afraid of. Not for himself, but for you. He hated seeing the anxiety that wrought you, and the power that a tiny metaphor had over you. He never agreed with the whole god and church thing, but to see you so distraught… he couldn’t stand it.
You tried at a smile. For him. But he could tell you were still worried. Sure, he took the boogeyman off its pedestal. But how to show you its insignificance?
Jungkook’s eyes trailed down, and spotted where his hands had explored earlier. Your soaked panties clung to your cunt, the thick fabric drenched with arousal. Before he could think anymore about what he was about to do, he dove under your dress, pulling down your panties in one fell swoop.
You let out a loud gasp at the sudden breeze in between your legs, but it was quickly replaced with a moan with Jungkook’s tentative lick at your folds. Your legs turned to jelly. You’d never felt anything like this before. This, you thought, must be what heaven feels like. The way he kissed so softly, ran his tongue through your folds like he was enjoying a five-course meal. He was being so gentle and sweet, hooking your legs over his arms in between his face. He looked up at you from under your skirt, only to send a wink. You whimpered instinctively, choking back your loud moans with every lick.
When he latched onto your clit, you about lost it. The sensitive bundle of nerves shivering with the sensations he was presenting it with, tingles moving through your body like an electric shock in the best way possible. His tongue is swirling around your clit like a whirlpool, licking up your juices and covering your mound in his saliva. You cry out once he adds suction, clutching your sheets in a death grip as his cheeks hollow. He looks up at you with big eyes. He looks so innocent in the moment, and not at all like he’s currently bringing your entire world crashing down into pleasure with just a flick of his tongue.
He let go with a pop, allowing you a moment to breath. “You like that, baby? Did I make you feel good?” He asked with a smirk, wiping your juices with the back of his hand. You let out a tiny sigh at the sight, eyes half-lidded as you watched the grinning man who had you under his full control. You gave him a lazy nod, heat rushing to your cheeks at the admission. Only to make his grin grow wider.
Jungkook thought you looked a lot more relaxed now. Body slightly quivering, but more open and loosened up. But, eating you out wasn’t the end of his plan. It was only the beginning.
He took advantage of your momentary haze to inspect the discarded cross. Once it passed his judgement, he held it up to you. “Does this still scare you, baby?”
Your reaction was instant, though more less defined now. He could see how conditioned you were about this cross, how much it held you back. There was only one way to fix that.
“It’s nothing more than wood, love.” He cooed, rubbing your thighs soothingly. A distraction as he inched the ornament closer and closer to your heat. “It doesn’t have any power over you. If anything, you have power over it.”
You nodded at his words, willing to eat them up. He must be right, the way his eyes were shining so pretty right now. There was no way a man who looked like an angel could be wrong. If he said you shouldn’t be scared, maybe he had a point. Maybe god would forgive you. Maybe Jesus died for your sins, as your cross served a constant reminder of. But, he could forgive you for this. Maybe, this wasn’t as bad as it seemed. Maybe…
Your eyes widened as you let out a gasp at the small object being pushed into your wet heat. Jungkook shushed you calmingly, rubbing your clit to get you to open up. You looked down to see the sacred cross, being pushed deeper and deeper into your cunt. You felt a small amount of pain at the penetration, your fingers the only ones your tight pussy had ever known. But Jungkook was going slow, making sure you were adjusting well. “See darling? It’s under my control now.”
Oh lord, forgive me. You thought fleetingly as your eyes screwed shut. He started to move the small symbol in and out, slow at first. Establishing a tempo. You didn’t have time to think of the implications. What this would mean for your wretched soul. How he was simultaneously defiling your body and a symbol of god. Jeon Jungkook had guts, you had to give him that. Coincidentally, being a ghost-buster awarded him that trait. While you were twisting and turning, body writing on your bed as your soul fought with itself, fear ebbing away and pure pleasure taking over.
He held onto the cross, fingers twisting around the top, like he was holding a sword. Sheathing it within your pussy repeatedly. “Look at you now. Not so scary, is it?” He landed a small kiss on your inner thigh. “You have nothing to fear when you’re with me.” His other hand came up to drag up your folds, long, veiny hands tickling your most sensitive parts. He was being undeniably gentle, but you wanted more. You could take it, you thought. You’d burn in hell anyways, what’s the point of being coy?
“More, Jungkook.” You whined, bucking your hips up. “Please?”
A small chuckle escaped him. “Making demands now, angel?” He came up to hover over you, cross buried in your cunt. You saw a glint of mischief flash in his eyes before he swooped down for a sloppy kiss. “Talk to me. Tell me what you want me to do to you, just like you did in that confessional.”
“Mm, I—” You hesitated with his eyes on you, suddenly shy again. Jungkook took to kissing down your body, slowly lowering himself back down while murmuring gentle encouragements. “Faster, please.” You rushed out, before you could stop yourself. “I want you to fuck me with that godforsakken thing harder.”
A smile the devil would be jealous of flashed on his face. His eyes turned dark at your hasty request, a click of his tongue your only warning before he abided. Pulling the cross out slowly, and then shoving it back in with a rough hand. You let out a cry, but he could see your pussy clenching tightly around the object. He did it again, more ruthlessly this time. Faster, harder. Until he was sure he was bruising your walls. But you didn’t stop him. Your legs quivered, and he saw a shimmer of tears in your eyes, but you just kept beginning for more. “This is what you wanted? When you were confessing in there, I was imagining all the things I could do to you. How you seemed so pure and chaste, but you hid such dirty desires beneath that holy outfit. But this? I didn’t know just how obscene you were. Getting off to being fucked with a cross. Wanting me to go harder, be rougher with you. Fucl, how would you take my dick?” He moaned at his own words, imagining how much more filthy your cravings could get.
“Please,” you choked out, feeling a tightness in your stomach. You recognized it as your orgasm fast approaching. “Please, Jungkook. I want your cock so bad. You don’t know how often I’ve thought of it, stretching me. How big it would be. How hard it would feel, pressing against my walls. Please. Give it to me, and I’ll be good, I promise.”
Jungkook cursed at your words, speeding up his pace with the cross, his other hands rubbing harshly at your clit. He could feel you were on the edge of orgasm, and he wanted to see you cum all over the small ornament so badly. With just a few more rough strokes, you were writhing on the bed as arousal gushed forth from your hole, coating his hands and the cross in your cum. He pulled it out of your cunt with a groan at the sight, the way your legs flew shut automatically as you tried to recuperate. But he was in a rush. You were soft and prepped enough to take his cock. And besides, he was about a second away from busting his own load, and, if that wouldn’t have been embarrassing enough, he wouldn’t’ve even gotten the chance to be inside you and give you what you wanted.
He pushed your legs open again gently after he pulled his pants off in a haste. You were just coming out of your post-orgasmic bliss, catching a sight of his long cock stood stiffly in between his legs. Your eyes widened. He was huge. How were you ever going to take him when all your cunt knew was your small, skinny fingers? You were going to be wrecked, ruined. Evidence of your night with him would plague you in the way you would walk the next morning, you knew it. Your sins would be written all over your face, your body telling the tale.
But that made you want it even more.
“You ready?” In all the frantic haste, Jungkook stopped for a moment to examine your face, making absolutely certain that you wanted this. Your resolute nodded solidified your desire, and eased his worries. With a soft kiss pressed to your lips, he held you close as he tapped his cock against your entrance. Almost as though it was a door, and he was asking for permission to go in. He rubbed the tip against your folds, brushing over your clit, and earning a large whine from you. You pushed your hips up against him bravely, begging for more. He was met with your pout when he looked at you, in return, a smile spreading across his lips. With a wink, he gripped his thick cock in hand, and pushed inside you slowly.
The stretch was like something you’ve never experienced before, your body frozen at the penetrative sensation. The cross was nothing compared to this, you thought, as he eased his way inside. You could feel him going deeper, thinking it would never end. Inching in, little by little. Just when you thought he was all the way in, he’d move again. God, he was endless. You held your breath as navigated his way through, pressing gentle kisses onto your skin with small murmurs of “almost there,” “you’re doing great.”
Finally, he was buried inside. You let out the breath you were holding, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. Jungkook looked down worriedly, “Are you okay? Can I move?”
Your virginity was lost, the metaphorical seal broken. The deed was truly done. And yet, you felt no guilt. No gut-wrenching heartache, no culpability. Not a damn thing for throwing away your religious vows. All you felt was relief. And happiness that it was the man above you who took you on this journey. His eyebrow piercing glinted playfully at you as his eyebrows furrowed in concentration. You pulled him down for a kiss as your answer.
He breathed against your lips, taking your green light to pull back out and go in again while you were distracted with the kiss. You wrapped your arms around him tighter, wanting to feel his chest pressed against yours. You could feel his muscles with every move of his hips, surrounding you like a protection. He chased your lips like candy, never letting you escape. Soft lips hungrily biting at yours. Now that he knew you liked it rough, he’d take full advantage of that.
“Oh lord,” you moaned as he swiveled his hips, moving faster into your virgin cunt. You felt his heavy balls slapping against you, his groans in your ear like a melody as a distraction from how he was shaping your insides to fit his girth. He pulled one of your shaky legs to wrap around his waist, using the new angle to piston his hips ruthlessly into you. It was your first time, he knew that. But he couldn’t help himself. All those things he’d heard you say during your confession came rushing back to him. He looked down at you, making sure you were actually there, and not in his imagination this time. Your eyes shut, mouth fallen open in pleasure, skin exposed for his marking. This is better than anything he’d thought of. And he felt privileged, being the only one you let under your skirt. You didn’t know it, always so trusting and sweet, but Jungkook heard the whispers about you. Watched the way eyes followed you in any room you entered. Heard the way men would talk about your ass, your pretty face, how you’d look with their cum splattered on your cheek. It was obscene and disgusting. If only Jungkook hadn’t partook in those thoughts himself.
“Please, please, I—” you were unable to finish your thoughts with your second orgasm of the night approaching. You both were never gonna last long, Jungkook knew that. You had wanted this for so long, and had rushed so frantically into each other that you were bound to feel release creeping up on you like restitution for your suffering desires. He could feel his own coming up, knew that once he got a taste of your body, he wouldn’t be too far behind. Neither of you could care less. Wrapped up in one another, all you wanted was satisfaction, that sweet moment you’ve both been craving for so long.
“Cum for me, sweetheart,” he commanded, seasoned hands abusing your pussy into submission. You had no choice but to listen as he stimulated your clit, his engorged cock hitting your bundle of nerves from the inside. You came with a loud cry, one he muffled with his mouth. Jungkook couldn’t take it, the way you looked, the way you held onto him so tightly. The way you clenched impossibly tightly around his cock. It only took a few wreckless strokes, hitting hard and deep into your cunt, for him to spill his seed inside you.
“God forgive us,” you panted as you lay there post-orgasm, entangled in one another with only sin for company.
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ggukiepie · a month ago
so good
pairing: jungkook x reader
summary: just some steamy sex with your boyfriend jk
tags: established relationship, smut, literally pwp, the plot is maybe two sentences long lmao, a little bit of fluff
warnings: dom!jk, sub!reader, kissing, a little bit of cock warming, bondage (handcuffs !), pet names <33, spanking, oral (f. receiving), fingering, multiple orgasms, squirting, anal play, anal fingering, reader kinda goes into subspace at the end, unprotected sex (!! plz be safe), creampie, i think that's it
wc: 3.3k
a/n: first one shot im releasing that is smutttt yay <33 requests are open and like, reblog, tell me ur thoughts on this one shot !! / masterlist
“Stop,” Jungkook says. This is the second time he’s said it and you know deep down if you keep going, he’s going to snap pretty soon. Your body stills as you’re perched on his lap, arms around his neck and legs trapping his, face buried in the crook of his neck. His cock is inside you and he’s so undeniably hard that you’re trying your best not to move.
You can still feel his arms move, fingers moving quickly on his keyboard as he’s still playing Overwatch. He’s been playing for hours and you were bored. And horny. Horny because he was such a tease this morning—you were making breakfast and he had come up behind you, grinded his hips against yours as he oh so innocently asked if you could make him breakfast as well. And it wasn’t just that. He teased you while you both ate breakfast. He teased you when you showered, surprisingly joining you in the shower but not touching you at all. Then he ignored you and started playing, so you whined and whined until he said you could come sit on his lap and wait while he finished.
You roll your hips just to get back at him. He hisses through his teeth. You smile to yourself.
“Baby,” he warns and you roll your hips again, even daring yourself to start kissing up the column of his neck. “Stop moving or I’ll spank you.”
You roll your eyes and scoff. “As if,” you say as you grind down against his hips. “You’re too busy playing.”
He drops one hand to squeeze your waist in warning. You’re going to get what you want, finally, even though you’d probably be punished first. But you don't mind. You loved it even, craved for it. And you knew Jungkook loved this little game you both were playing as well.
Suddenly it’s quiet and you realize he closed the game. “Bed. Now,” is all he says. He sounds so serious so you have no choice but to stand up and walk quickly to the bed. You know this by now. Everything comes second nature to you that your body moves on its own. You take your shirt off so you’re finally naked and then you kneel on the bed and look down.
You don’t dare look up as you hear him moving around the room. Excitement is coursing through your veins and you can’t help but fidget in your position. Sure, you had to push a few of his buttons to get him to snap and give you what you want. You were probably going to get punished for it but it was fine. It was—
Your head snaps up and your eyes zero in on the handcuffs he’s holding in front of you. Your eyes widen. Okay, so maybe you pushed him a little too far. He looks so serious, eyes brooding and staring straight at you. You’re frozen in place as he stares down on you.
“Don’t make me ask again, sweetheart.”
His voice snaps you from your trance and you bring both hands up. He cuffs your wrists silently and you feel goosebumps across your skin. You’re not sure if it’s from the cold metal or the scary look on his face. His eyes roam your body, from your lips to your perked nipples and down to your core. Your cheeks redden from his burning gaze.
“Ass up and head down, baby. You know the drill.”
Your mouth opens in surprise. “But—”
He raises his eyebrow. “Do you want me to get the whip?” You shake your head quickly and get into position but it’s hard because your hands are handcuffed. Jungkook knows this as well and he enjoys seeing you struggle as you try to get on all fours. You end up leaning on your elbows with your face pressed against the mattress. You spread your knees and arch your back, not in the slightest bit embarrassed that he’s now seeing how wet you are.
He places his hand on your back and you jump at his soothing touch. He rubs your skin soothingly but you know he’s just doing that to get you to relax. “Count to fifteen for me, okay?” he says lowly. “And if you make a mistake, we’ll start all over again.”
Before you can even reply you feel his palm smacking your ass, his big hand hitting your right cheek and your body jolting in surprise. You feel the pain shoot down all the way to your toes. “O-one,” you choke out. Despite this you arch your back even further.
Jungkook chuckles and rubs your skin slowly. “My naughty baby,” he says softly. “Didn’t listen to me at all,” he continues and slaps your ass again, this time the left cheek.
“Two,” you whisper hoarsely. “I’m sorry, I’m—”
Another hit. You count again. And again and again. There’s a fine line between pleasure and pain, really. You want to evade his slaps but you also want more. Jungkook’s slapping your ass and you’re counting and you want him to stop but at the same time you don’t because it just feels so good. It’s making your head fuzzy, the pain that’s spreading through your body but also making you incredibly wet. Your pussy is dripping, can tell from the way you feel it coating your inner thighs.
Another slap. This time it’s on the skin where your ass and thigh meet. “Six,” you croak out.
Jungkook laughs from behind you and pinches your butt. “Wrong number. Again.”
You try to shuffle from your position. Your elbows are starting to hurt from leaning on it for too long. Your ass is on fire and you’re sure you won’t be able to sit down properly tomorrow. “No—” you try to argue, try to wiggle from away but Jungkook’s holding your waist firmly. He’s rubbing smoothing circles on your skin but it’s not doing anything for you.
“We can always stop. You just have to say the word.” He touches your core this time, his fingers teasing your clit. You moan and press back further into him. “Seems like you even like it. My little pain slut.” He pinches your clit and you gasp.
“Again please. Slap me again. I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” you rush out. Your brain is fuzzy and you feel everything and nothing at once. You want to feel the pain. You want to prove that you can handle it. Want to make Jungkook happy. To please him.
He says nothing more and slaps your ass. You start counting from one again and he keeps going and you don’t tell him to stop. You’re crying by the tenth slap, shoulders pressed against the bed and your arms stretched out in front of you. Jungkook alternates from rubbing your skin affectionately to slapping you harshly.
“Last one, sweetheart. You’re doing so well for me.” He’s rubbing your ass and you feel his thumb press down on your rim and you absolutely keen, the filthiest moan coming out of your mouth and your spine stretching even further. “God,” he laughs. “Such a fucking slut, hm?” he chastises and presses down even harder. Your eyes roll back and you’re seeing stars. The pleasure feels so good. His hand feels so good. “A fucking slut who’d take anything I’d give, right?”
You nod because you can’t say anything else, mind too ridden in pleasure.
Jungkook slaps you for the last time. One harsh smack that leaves a handprint on your left cheek and you hear it echo in the room.
“Fifteen,” you shriek. “Thank you, I’m sorry—” You’re babbling now. You feel Jungkook lean over you, his body covering yours as he kisses up your spine, your neck to your ear.
“My good girl,” he says so softly as if he didn’t slap you more than twenty times. He nibbles your earlobe and you shiver. “Took your punishment so well, sweetheart,” he whispers in your ear.
“I want you,” you beg. “Please, I want you now.” You feel his body leave you and suddenly you’re craving for his warmth again. But then you feel his mouth on your pussy, his tongue licking into you and you groan. “More.” You press further into your face as he eats you out. “Want more. Please.”
“Greedy girl,” he says as he sucks on your clit. Your orgasm is coming embarrassingly close. It just feels so good. His tongue is swirling on your clit, collecting your juices that he laps up like he’s starved. He pleasures you so well that your thighs are shaking. You’re almost there, almost feel the knot in your stomach snap.
But then Jungkook leans back just as you’re about to orgasm. He’s mean. Jungkook is so undeniably mean sometimes that you want to smack him for it. Want to reach down with your own hands and make yourself come but you can’t because you’re fucking handcuffed.
You whine out loud and more tears stream down your cheeks. “Jungkook,” you say, so wound up and frustrated and tired. All the while he’s laughing at your demise. Laughing at the way you struggle and squirm. Suddenly, he flips you and your back is on the mattress, eyes blown out and looking straight at him.
He hovers over your body and brushes your cheekbone with his thumb. “So pretty,” he murmurs. “Look so pretty when you cry, baby.” You pout at him and he grins.
He kisses you and you arch your back to get closer to him. His lips feel so good against yours, mouth opening slightly to let his tongue slither into yours and lick into your mouth. The kiss is messy and wet and it’s just the way Jungkook likes when he’s riled up like this. Likes it messy when he’s being mean and you let him anyway because you love it as well. He leans back and squeezes your cheeks with one hand, forcing you to open your mouth. You know what’s coming, can tell from the gleam in his eyes and the way he stares at your mouth. You put your tongue out and open your mouth even wider. He doesn’t even have to ask.
“God, you're filthy,” he says but spits in your mouth anyway. It hits your tongue and your hips roll up involuntarily. You swallow and open your mouth to show him, loving the way he looks at you like this. “Good girl.” He loops your cuffed hands around his neck so you’re trapped underneath him. His fingers trail down your body, pinching your nipples and then down to your clit where he circles it with two fingers.
“Jungkook,” you moan out. He’s rubbing your clit so quickly now and he’s also nipping at your neck, biting until the skin blossoms into pretty shades of pink. You’re coming before you know it, legs shaking and hips moving up and down. Still, his fingers don’t stop its assault on your cunt.
“Another one, sweetheart,” he whispers into your ear. “Let go for me.”
You close your eyes and focus on the way he’s playing with your clit. You’re not even embarrassed that he’s making you come again just from touching your clit alone. You feel your orgasm building up, the coil in your stomach becoming tight and then snapping. And then you feel the bliss, feel it all over your body that you don’t even moan or make a sound. You’re crying again from how good it feels.
Finally, finally Jungkook slows down his fingers. He kisses your forehead and looks down at you with his doe eyes. You can’t even focus on him, too busy trying to even your breathing. “So beautiful for me.” He thrusts two fingers into your core and you babble out his name over and over again. You feel full just from his fingers and you think you might come again.
“Need to stretch you out,” he huffs. He’s still wearing his boxers but you can see how hard he is already.
You shake your head. “Want you now.” He ignores you and continues fucking you with his fingers. “Jungkook,” you plead. “Need your cock. Please, please— I’ve been good,” you all but beg.
Suddenly he withdraws his hands and leans a bit back to take his boxers out, his cock springing out to slap against his stomach because he’s so big and hard and—it’s throbbing. He wants you just as much as you want him right now. He presses his body to yours as he holds his cock, rubbing its tip against your pussy to gather the juices. And then in one swift motion he enters you, filling you to the hilt where his pelvis is pressed against yours.
“Feels so tight,” he groans out. “Feel so good for me baby. God,” he chokes.
You’re at a loss for words, too focused on the feeling of being so full. He starts thrusting and he hits your g-spot right away.
“Faster,” you moan. You encircle your legs around his waist and bring him closer. He’s careful not to crush you so he places his forearms on either side of your head. Your legs instantly wrap around his waist and you push him even deeper, feeling him deep in your stomach. You can feel his cock brushing against your cervix and you arch your back even more, already unaware of the loud moans escaping your mouth. “Jungkook, I’m—”
He hikes your legs over his shoulders and because your cuffed hands are around his neck both of your bodies are pressed against each other, not a bit of space to separate you both. It feels like you’ve been folded in half and your legs are starting to ache but it feels so good. “God, look at you,” Jungkook breathes out as he keeps the punishing pace of his hips against yours, hands holding your thighs so tightly you’re sure it’s going to bruise. “Wanna wreck you, wanna—”
“I’m close,” you cry out and this time you’re not even embarrassed that you’re about to come again.
Jungkook starts kissing your jaw, nose pressed to your cheek as you feel his teeth nibbling your skin. “Come for me, baby. Want you to make a mess.”
And you do. You come from his filthy words, from the way his cock feels inside your pussy, from the way he’s holding you tightly. Your vision blurs for a moment and you cry from how good it feels, how your legs start to feel like static and everything’s wet and messy but you want more. Jungkook fucks you through your orgasm until you whine and tell him to slow down. Then he maneuvers your bodies until you’re on top of him and your hands are free of the handcuffs. You didn’t even realize he’s taken it off, your head too high up in the clouds and stuck in that feeling of pleasure and euphoria. You still feel his cock inside you, so big and heavy and it’s twitching. But Jungkook isn’t moving and is rubbing your wrists instead to try to ease the pain of being handcuffed for too long.
“You good?” he asks quietly and you look into his eyes, see the concern in it but there’s a bit pleasure in there too. You nod and kiss his nose, a small but sweet gesture that doesn’t go unnoticed by him because he’s smiling as well.
“Wanna keep going,” you say, voice hoarse and quiet from all the screaming you’ve done earlier. You start kissing down his neck, biting down on that sweet spot of his and it’s his turn to moan out loud. “Want you to fill me up, please.”
“Ride me baby. Be good and bounce on my cock for me, yeah?”
You nod quickly and start moving your hips up and down, resting your hands on his chest to go even faster. Your legs start to shake but you don’t care. You keep going despite the ache, the fatigue, despite the fact that your pussy feels so used but it still feels so good. But Jungkook’s helping you as well, hands on your waist to help you move up and down, words of encouragement and praise escaping his lips.
You feel yourself tighten around him, feel that coil tightening and wanting to snap. Your body feels so light but so heavy at the same time just begging for a release. You feel the wetness between your legs, to where you’re connected, to where it’s dripping down your thighs. You hear the sounds of skin slapping against skin. You feel rather than see Jungkook’s hands gripping your ass, squeezing the flesh between his long fingers. You feel his hand moving to your other hole, to the puckered rim that he played with a few moments ago. You push against him and moan again, wanting to tell him you want more but failing to get the words out your mouth because you’re too lost in the pleasure.
But Jungkook knows your body so well. “Greedy girl,” he says. “Always wanting more, huh?” he asks as you continue to bounce on his cock. You nod, the words barely processing in your pleasure muddled mind. His middle finger presses against your rim, not pushing it in but just applying pressure. Still, the coil inside you snaps and you feel your pussy gushing, your wetness coating your thighs and his chest and it doesn’t take long for Jungkook to start fucking into you, his pleasure taking control to reach that high he’s been holding off for so long.
“Come inside me, please,” you whimper as you let him use you, brushing away the sensitivity that’s building in your body.
“You feel so fucking tight, so fucking good, God,” he huffs out as he finally comes inside you, hips stilling against yours and cock twitching inside you. You feel him fill you up, so undeniably full and tired but so good.
You both stay like that for a while, with you on top of him and his arms around your waist, touching you everywhere while he’s leaving kisses on your neck.
His finger circles your rim again and you shiver but you don’t say anything. You both know you can tell him to stop and he will if you say so, but you stay quiet so he pushes his finger in.
“Jungkook,” you croak. God, you’re so tired but you want more.
His pace is slow inside your ass. “Think you can come for me like this, princess?”
You nod because you’re too tired to speak. He takes his finger out to gather your wetness around your pussy then enters your ass once more, wiggling his finger inside your walls and eliciting a tired and quiet moan out of you. After a while he presses another finger inside and it’s so tight and you feel so full, his dick inside your pussy and two fingers inside your ass. He thrusts his fingers a little bit faster and you feel your orgasm building again. You’ve lost count. Maybe you were at your fourth? You didn’t know.
Suddenly you’re coming, so silent because you’re tired and spent and then Jungkook retracts his fingers out. “So good to me. So perfect. You did so well baby,” he whispers into your hair. He moves to sit up but you shake your head and tighten your arms around his neck.
“Don’t leave me,” you say as tears stream down your face. You don’t know why you’re crying.
“Gotta clean you up, baby—”
“No,” you cry out and hug him even closer to you. “Rest first,” you breathe out. “Please.”
Your arms are tight around him as you try to slow down your breathing. Whimpering every so often when Jungkook’s hands brush over your ass. He rubs soothing circles down your spine, whispering into your hair words you can’t make out and kissing your forehead from time to time.
A beat of silence, and then, “Did I go too far?” he quietly asks.
You shake your head again. “I just…” You shiver from his touch. “Just need to calm down.”
“I love you,” he says, kissing your head, pressing his lips into your hair and rubbing his nose gently against it. He continues rubbing his hands up and down your back. You feel his heartbeat through his chest, slowly and soothing which puts you at ease.
“I love you too, Kook,” you murmur into his chest. “Love you so much.”
901 notes · View notes
jcwriting · 5 months ago
Written in the Stars
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summary ↬ being soulmates with a werewolf? pretty easy. being jungkook’s soulmate? the easiest thing in the world. there’s only one teensy tiny problem. he doesn’t want to fuck you.
pairing ↬ werewolf!jungkook x reader
genre ↬ soulmate!au, abo verse, fluff, angst, hurt/comfort (this is so fucking dramatic and for what)
word count ↬ 10.4k my hand slipped
warnings ↬ swearing, angst (but with a happy ending bc im a sappy bitch), jk is stupid in love (emphasis on stupid), mentions of violence (very brief and i don’t go into too much detail but just to warn yall), slight nsfw (sex is a big topic for like half of this but not sex is had...i know im shocked too), half of this is background info/setting up the story the other half is finally addressing the summary lolol, jk is kind of an asshole but he has reasons!!!!!
authors note ↬ hello lovelies! here’s a small little thing for you all (laughs in 10k word count). this has been sitting in my drafts for fucking ever and i just needed to get it out there and out of my hands. im thinking about writing a part two where the actual ~*/sex/*~ is had but im still on the fence about that. please let me know what you think! i literally crave your interactions so pls dont be shy,,,,,okay love you bye :)
(ps i was so close to naming this Rewrite the Stars but since this has absolutely nothing to do with The Greatest Showman i didn’t. but i was close,,,,so fucking close)
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You always knew Jeon Jungkook was destined for great things.
It was written in the stars, your mother had told you after he had first stepped foot into your family-owned grocery store. Your mother didn’t have any special powers, she just had a thing for astrology. While you normally shrugged off her random proclamations about divine intervention and planetary alignments, you found that Jungkook was something you couldn’t ignore or chalk up as your mother’s latest tea leaf reading.
From the moment you set eyes on him you knew he was different. While your family held zero claim to any sort of mystical or magical inclinations, you were well aware of those who did. It was no secret that non-humans roamed the Earth in plain sight, even though it had taken humans eons to realize this. After years of savage wars and civil unrest, agreements had come into place and governing bodies were adjusted to accept the changes that had finally been made. But, this was all before your time. You were the generation that was born into the period of peace, the first children to not experience bloodshed before they could walk. The world you knew now was almost a complete one-eighty of what it had been.
Where before those who were not of human blood had to do everything they could to blend in, now could be free of the shadows. Your classrooms had both humans and non-humans in their rosters. Some of your teachers were hybrids. Curriculum expanded to teach humans about a world that had once been entirely unknown to them. One of your favorite teachers was a witch who regaled your tenth grade class with stories of goblin wars, wizard duels, and vampire covens. All tales that you had once thought were nothing but fiction were now anything but.
Which is why, the second Jeon Jungkook entered the grocery store that your parents owned and that you had worked at since you were old enough to speak in full sentences, you knew who he was. You didn’t even question it.
He was a werewolf. A powerful one. You could see it in the way he carried himself. The purposeful strides he took down the narrow aisles, the confidence in his broad shoulders. Humans weren’t nearly as sensitive as their hybrid counterparts but you also paid attention in your classes. Or, perhaps you were more aware than other humans. Never in your life did you have the issues other faced when meeting a non-human for the first time. You always knew who they were without them having to tell you. You just knew.
So, when Jeon Jungkook stepped up to your register with a bottle of water and some raw beef, you didn’t flinch. Didn’t bend under his dark gaze or shuffle your feet in an awkward attempt to break the silence. Instead, you flashed him your customer service smile and rang up his items. He didn’t say a word as he paid, barely sparing you a second glance as he strode out of the store.
“He’s going to be a great and powerful man,” your mother said in that feathery light voice of hers. “It was written in the stars.”
You couldn’t help but agree.
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Jeon Jungkook came into your store everyday for the next month. He bought the same thing every time. A bottle of water and a package of raw beef. The only time he spared you any words was to say thank you or the occasional hello if the sun was shining. Usually, he was alone. Sometimes, he came with a few members of his pack. You liked those days. He smiled a little brighter and talked a little louder when they were around. Especially around Taehyung.
Then, after a month, he didn’t come in. Not for an entire week. From Monday to Sunday, you hadn’t seen a hide nor hair of him. A part of you was worried, so worried that you almost stopped Taehyung in the middle of the street to ask of Jungkook’s whereabouts before realizing how insane that made you look, the other part was chastising yourself for caring. Jeon Jungkook was a customer. Nothing more, nothing less.
The following Monday had come and you had finally stopped glancing at the sliding doors every five minutes. You no longer expected his commanding presence to rock your little world. Instead, you continued your day as if it had been any other. That was, until, Jeon Jungkook stepped through the entrance looking as if he was walking on air. It didn’t take a genius to figure out why.
“Did you have a good heat?” You asked when he stepped up to your register. Jungkook fumbled the water bottle he had been setting onto the conveyer belt before turning to stare at you.
“What did you just say?”
You didn’t shrink under his intense glare. “I was asking if you enjoyed your heat. Seems like you did.”
“How do you know I was in my rut?”
“Oh, is rut the correct terminology? Sorry, they always interchanged them in class, I was never sure what was appropriate.” You shrugged and rang up his items. “It was kind of obvious, though. You seemed pretty agitated about a week-and-a-half ago, then you disappear for a week, and now you’re back looking happier than ever. If it wasn’t your rut then I want to know where you went on vacation because that’s where I’m heading to next.”
Jungkook laughed. That almost made you jump out of your skin. You had never heard him laugh before. It was throaty, it was deep, and it was wonderful. “I’ll be sure to send you the link to the Airbnb.”
“And how do you plan on doing that?”
He smirked. “I’m here every day, aren’t I?”
You tilted your head as you accepted the cash he handed to you. “Clearly, you’re not that reliable.”
Jungkook laughed again. It was becoming your new favorite sound. “My apologies. I didn’t mean to appear flaky.”
“You’re forgiven,” you decided as you handed him the plastic bag of his purchases. Teasingly, you added, “just make sure it doesn’t happen again.”
He flashed you a smile that showed off his sharpened canines. “Don’t worry, darling. I never make the same mistake twice.”
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Jeon Jungkook kept his promise. He showed up everyday, like clockwork. Bought the same thing. Arrived at the same time. The only thing that changed was how he treated you. It wasn’t that he treated you badly before, he had always been polite. But now, he talked to you. He asked you questions and answered yours. More often than not, he laughed.
(It had become your favorite sound.)
For three months, this continued. The two of you had settled into a comfortable routine, something you relied on and expected. Until, he changed that.
Until, Jeon Jungkook asked you out on a date.
“What did you just say?”
“Are you free? Tonight?” You glanced around, almost expecting to see some sort of supermodel posing behind you to explain the absolute absurdity of the situation. “What are you doing?”
“Looking for the hidden cameras. I think I’m getting Punk’d.”
Jungkook sighed and placed both hands on the counter that separated the two of you. “Look at me.” You did. Slowly and warily, but you did. “Does it look like I’m lying to you?”
Narrowing your eyes, you regarded him carefully. He seemed serious. But, then again, do you ever really know someone? “I don’t know. I’ve never actually seen you lie before so I wouldn’t know the difference.”
“Fine. Ask me what color my shirt is.”
“What color is your shirt?”
“White,” he deadpanned. You glanced down at his chest. His shirt was black.
He threw his head back and released a full bellied laugh. Even in your exasperation you couldn’t help but soften a little. “I’m sorry, darling. I couldn’t help myself.” Annoyed, you huffed and spun to face the cash register. Stabbing your finger onto the touchscreen, you ignored Jungkook’s obvious presence on the opposite side of the counter. Until his hand reached around the card reader and grasped a hold of your chin. The warmth of his fingers forced your head to turn to meet his.
“Come to dinner with me.” His voice was nothing but a rumble in his chest, his eyes so black and all-consuming you couldn’t do anything but agree with him. He seemed pleased by your response as his fingers tightened against your skin and a grateful smile flicked past his lips. His gaze darted down to your mouth and your breath froze in your chest.
“Are you going to kiss me?”
Jungkook raised an eyebrow. “Do you want me to?”
“No.” You tried to shake your head but his grip didn’t allow you much movement. He was taken aback by your answer, a small frown tugging at his mouth. You quickly backtracked to fix the situation. “I don’t want our first kiss to be in a grocery store. That’s a new low that I refuse to reach.”
Jungkook chuckled and tapped your chin gently. “Alright, darling. I’ll pick you up at seven.”
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Again, he kept his promise to you. He showed up at your parents house exactly at seven, wearing a button-down shirt and slacks. The tulips he had gotten for you was thrust into your hands the moment you opened the door. Flashing him a genuine smile, you hurried into the kitchen to set them in water while your mother grilled him on his birth time. You were quick to drag him away, practically throwing him towards the car as you waved goodbye.
“Sorry,” you sighed as Jungkook opened the passenger door for you. “She has a…thing for astrology. She’s probably creating your star map or whatever right now.”
“It’s okay,” he responded once he got into the drivers seat. “It’s sweet of her to care.”
You snorted. “She’s delusional is what she is.”
“So, you’re saying you don’t believe in astrology?”
“Do you?”
Jungkook shrugged as he pulled out of your dirt driveway. He looked so damn attractive behind the wheel it was honestly unfair. “Not really saying I do or don’t. All I know is that there are a lot of things out there that are out of our control. If believing in the stars and planets helps you gain some of that control back, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that.”
“God, don’t talk like that in front of my mother. She’ll want to start dating you.”
He grinned and placed a hand on your knee. “Tell her I’m already taken.”
You didn’t get a chance to respond to that. Not that he didn’t give you one, it was just that you literally had nothing to say. With just one sentence he opened the floodgates of your brain and the amount of thoughts that were flying through your conscious was painful. Anxiety fluttered in your stomach and you pressed your lips together to keep you from word vomiting onto him. No, it was better to keep your mouth shut and let the moment pass.
By the time you reached the restaurant you were a trembling mess of nerves. Were you guys dating? You thought this was just a ‘testing the waters’ date, not a ‘you’re my girlfriend now’ date. Did you have to make it Facebook official? You hated that shit.
Jungkook didn’t comment on your obvious distress, though. He merely placed a hand on the small of your back, ignoring how you jerked in surprise, and led you into the quiet bistro. Nodding politely to the hostess who was practically panting at the sight of him (you honestly couldn’t blame her) and pulled out your chair for you. When he sat down, he started talking. Idle chat at first. Commenting on one of the dishes, asking about the college classes you were taking at your local university. Before you realized it, wine was in your glass and your shoulders were loose. Previous nerves forgotten, you lost yourself in Jungkook. You drank, you ate, you laughed, and genuinely enjoyed his company. Honestly, it was the best date you’d ever been on.
“I have to be honest with you,” Jungkook spoke after he finished his raw steak. “I have an ulterior motive for asking you here tonight.”
“Oh,” you mumbled around the shrimp you had just tossed in your mouth. “So…this isn’t a date?”
“No, it is,” Jungkook clarified quickly around a dry chuckle. He seemed…nervous. It put you on edge immediately. “This is definitely a date. And, also, more.”
“More? What, is this a proposal too?” You were joking. A 100% joking. But Jungkook was staring at you so seriously it made you panic. “Jungkook, if you get down on one knee here I swear-”
“I’m not proposing,” he assured you. “This is something more than that.”
“More?” You parroted. Jungkook sighed.
“Do you know what a true mate is?”
Right there, in that quaint little bistro, on a date with quite possibly the most untouchable man you’d ever met, he explained how you were irrevocably his. His true mate, his soulmate.
Jungkook explained everything in great detail, which you appreciated, because honestly, you had no words. He explained how when he was born, the witch who cared for him told his father that his future glared brightly ahead of him, but only when he met his other half. True mates were rare. Mating was common, the wolves in his pack could have multiple mates or a lifelong one, but true mates were destiny. Someone or something out there had forged the two of you together. You were essentially each others other half. He was made for you and you were made for him.
“But…aren’t true mates only for wolves? I thought it’s impossible for a human to be a true mate,” you asked in a shaky voice once Jungkook took a breath.
“It was supposed to be impossible. Until, I met you.” Jungkook stared at you with a sort of reverence that made your entire body blush. “I have no idea how you are. I’ve spent hours researching. I’ve consulted with members of my pack and others. No one knows why.”
“Are you sure, though? I mean…what if you’re wrong?”
“I’m not.” Jungkook shook his head. “I visited the witch right after I met you. She took one look at me and told me that I had finally found my true mate. She said she’d never seen a future so bright before.”
You had no words for that. For the first time in your life, you were speechless. Jungkook seemed to understand. He let you sit in silence as he paid for the bill and walked you out to the car. The drive back to your parents house was the same. You couldn’t speak. The shock rendered you stupid.
By the time Jungkook pulled into the driveway you still hadn’t spoken a word to each other. You stepped out of the car before he could open the door for you. Walking up to the porch steps in a trance, you didn’t hear him follow you until he clasped your wrist in his hand. Turning to face him, you were surprised to see his brown eyes so big. They practically sparkled in the moonlight and he looked so soft and sweet you nearly melted into the wood beneath your feet.
“Please,” he whispered. “Can you…just - are you okay? You’ve been so quiet. I’m worried I’ve scared you off or something.”
With that voice, it was impossible to deny him. So, you said the first thing that popped in your head. “Do we have to make it Facebook official?”
Jungkook stared at you before bursting into laughter. “Really? That’s all you have to say?”
You blushed and glanced down. “I’m just worried, that’s all. I can’t remember my Facebook password so even if you wanted to change it I don’t think it’ll work.”
“So that’s why you never accepted my friend request,” Jungkook teased. Before you could squeak out a response, he wrapped his arms around your waist and tugged you forward. You kept your arms crossed across your chest but let yourself fall against him.
“Don’t make fun of me,” you whined as you buried your face into his shoulder. He smelled so good, a mixture of pine and spice. “My brain hasn’t worked since you told me I’m yours, so bear with me.”
Jungkook chuckled and gently swayed you from side to side. “Does that mean you’re okay with this? All of this?”
Sighing, you lifted your head up and stepped away from him. Jungkook was not impressed and pulled you back to him. Your heart swelled in your chest and you wrapped your arms around his neck in consolation. “Honestly? I haven’t really processed anything. You’ve had your whole life to come to terms with this. I just found out thirty minutes ago that I’m someone’s soulmate. It’s a lot to take in.”
Jungkook nodded as he tapped his fingers against your hips. “I know. It’s a lot…I’m a lot. I just want you to know that you don’t have to do this. You don’t have to be with me. I won’t-”
Now it was your turn to burst into laughter. You couldn’t believe those words had left his mouth. It was easily the most absurd thing you’d ever heard. “Jungkook, I want to make something very clear. I have no problem being your true mate. That’s not the issue here. Well, there really isn’t an issue. It’s just…hard to believe, I guess. I have to process that this is my new reality.”
“Really?” Jungkook perked up and looked so fucking cute you couldn’t help but cup his cheeks. His skin was so warm despite the cold autumn air that surrounded you both. “You want to do this? Be with me? Be mine?” All you could do was nod. You were so overwhelmed with emotions. The shock was evident, but a piece of you was so happy. You felt whole.
Jungkook’s face split into a wide smile that caused his nose to scrunch up. He wrapped his arms around your waist and spun you around. Squealing, you slung your legs around his hips and held on. Normally, you’d rather die than show this much affection to someone. But, this was Jungkook. Your soulmate.
“So…what do we do now?” You asked once Jungkook set you down. “Is there, like, a ceremony or something?”
“I have no idea,” he admitted as he stared down at you. He had a hand against your jaw and was rubbing your cheek tenderly. “I really didn’t think I’d get this far.”
You scoffed at his ridiculousness. While recognizing you were Jungkook’s true mate was going to take some time, believing that he thought you’d deny him was utter nonsense. “What if…what if we date, first?” You suggested timidly. “I know that sounds kind of weird considering we’re supposed to be the loves of each others lives. But, I don’t really know you all that well. And, I think this is going to take sometime for me to get used to. Maybe we should date, get to know each other, and just learn how to be with one another.”
“Whatever you want,” Jungkook agreed. “We can do whatever you want. Just as long as I have you, I’m happy.”
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Two years passed.
Two blissful, wonderful years. Two years of dating, two years of loving, two years of being Jeon Jungkook’s. It was everything you could’ve asked for and more. You had never felt so loved and cherished in your entire life. He respected you, he took care of you, and most importantly, he was there for you in every sense. Since the moment you met him, you hadn’t been alone. He hadn’t let you. Jungkook knew you better than you knew yourself.
And, it was the same for him. You were there for him when he transitioned into the leader of his pack. You were there when he took over the CEO position from his father and encouraged and supported him every step of the way. You let yourself be loved and in return he let you love him. It was wonderful.
Except, for one tiny thing.
While the emotional aspect of your relationship flourished and bloomed into something beautiful, the physical side remained stagnant. Make out sessions and heavy petting were a norm in your relationship. At first, it didn’t bother you. In fact, you loved that Jungkook was taking things so slow and so seriously. But, eventually, your needs began to grow. You found yourself wanting him in more ways than one, wants that only he could satisfy. Jungkook refused. Every time.
It wasn’t like he refused your every need. No, Jungkook was extremely attentive. When it came to himself, that’s when things got dicy. He had no problem spending hours between your legs, worshipping you until you were crying from the overstimulation. Yet, he wouldn’t let you anywhere near him. Not without lack of trying on your part. The minute your hands went down to his waistband, he pushed you away. Every time you tried to dip your mouth to the obvious bulge in his pants, he lifted you up and kissed you breathless until you forgot your name. It wasn’t until after a year of dating that he finally let you grind on his clothed cock. Even then, he held off until you finished and then walked out with quite possibly the worst case of blue balls. You hated that he did this to himself. The worst part was, you couldn’t understand why.
The one time you had brought it up to him it had resulted in the worst fight the two of you had ever gotten into. It was the only argument that was never really resolved. After the yelling and the tears, all you got out of Jungkook was that mating with a wolf was not pretty. It was extremely dangerous and he refused to put you in that kind of danger. End of discussion. No matter how hard you tried to persuade him or broach the subject, he shut it down. Hard. Eventually, you gave up.
He even spent his ruts away from you. Every three months, he left you for a week. You knew he had a place somewhere up in the mountains and you assumed that’s where he went. You had no idea. There was no point even asking to come along. You loved your boyfriend and didn’t want to purposely give him a heart attack. You hated it when he left. As much as you tried to hide it and convince him that you were just fine, he wasn’t stupid. Being away from him was tough. A piece of you was missing whenever he was gone. And you were only whole again when he returned.
This past week had been one of those weeks. He had left on Sunday for the mountains. He was agitated and clingy, how he normally was pre-rut. Jungkook wouldn’t let you leave his side and you spent most of the weekend on his lap or wrapped in his arms. Not that you minded. When he left your parents house on Sunday night, you’d had to coax him out of the door. Promising him that you’d be okay and that you’d see him next week. It wasn’t until several kisses later did Jungkook finally leave.
While you’d been doing this for two years, it never got easier. More manageable? Sure. But definitely not easier. All you could do was go through the motions. You went to work at the local bakery, came home and helped your mom with dinner, watched TV with your dad before going to bed. Taehyung and Jimin would visit often, threatened by Jungkook to keep you company. While you assured them it wasn’t necessary, you secretly didn’t mind. They made you laugh and made you temporarily forget your boyfriend was miles away from you. Sometimes, if you were lucky, he’d call you to tell you goodnight. But those times were rare. Normally, you didn’t hear from him until Friday or Saturday when he was finally coming out of his rut and returning to the world.
By the time Sunday rolled around, you were a jittery ball of nerves. Not in a bad sense. You were just excited. The anticipation killed you and it took all of your willpower to sit and wait for his text to tell you to come over. Your parents always left you alone on these Sundays, unable to deal with your hyperactiveness and constant fidgeting.
This Sunday was no different. You puttered around your room for the better part of the day. You spent the other part in the kitchen, baking like your life depended on it. Jungkook loved your cookies and you always made sure to come over with at least three batches after his ruts. He always said that was his second favorite part about coming home, after seeing you, of course.
You had just finished packaging the final batch in a glass cookie jar when your phone dinged. You didn’t have to read the message, you knew exactly what it said. Pure joy rushed through your system as you threw on your coat and shouted a hasty goodbye to your parents. Juggling the cookies and car keys, you sprinted to your car. The drive to Jungkook’s was thankfully not long. About ten minutes, as long as you didn’t hit any traffic on the main road. Luck was on your side, though, and you showed up at Jungkook’s house in eight minutes.
Taehyung’s car was in the driveway when you pulled up, which wasn’t odd. Although Jungkook owned the house, the members of his pack were almost always around. While most preferred to travel in their wolf forms, you knew Taehyung and Namjoon preferred cars. Something about being able to listen to their own music without comments from the peanut gallery. You didn’t really understand and didn’t really need to. You had just chalked it up as one of their many quirks.
Carrying the trays of cookies in both hands, you shut your car door with your foot before speed-walking up the stone walkway to Jungkook’s home. The screen door was shut, but the wooden door was swung wide open. You had just reached for the metal handle when you heard it.
A deep, threatening growl ripped through the peaceful quiet and froze you in place. You knew it was Jungkook. While you had only heard it once, you’d never forgotten it. It was when the two of you had attended a party and an alpha from a neighboring pack had cornered you in the hallway. Jungkook had found you cowered against the wall as the other alpha had caged you in. The sound that had left his chest had given you equal parts comfort and fear. Comfort, because he was there and you knew you were safe. Fear, because you could see in the way he bared his teeth and how his muscles vibrated, he had been furious and bloodthirsty.
That’s what you felt now, fear.
Something was wrong. Something was very, very wrong.
From your vantage point in front of the screen door, you could see directly into the kitchen. Taehyung was leaning against the granite countertop and Jungkook was seated at the island. The tension was so thick you practically choked on it.
“Enough, Taehyung.”
“No,” Taehyung snapped, seeming just as angry as Jungkook. “I’m not dropping it. Not this time.”
“Yes, you will,” Jungkook snarled. “I’m not having this conversation with you.”
“Too fucking bad.” While Taehyung was also an alpha, he acted so much like a beta you never really noticed. Until now. “I’m not going to sit by and watch you do this to yourself anymore. Not spending your ruts correctly is only causing you more harm than good.”
“I’m doing things the way I want to, and it’s working-”
“The hell it is!” Jungkook growled at the interruption but Taehyung ignored him. “It’s not working, and you know it. Anyone with two fucking eyes knows it. It’s getting so bad that the pack is noticing, too. Even Namjoon has realized something is wrong, and he’s as oblivious as they come.”
“If they have a problem with me they can take it up with me.”
“No, they can’t. Because you won’t listen. Your head is so far up your ass you can’t even hear yourself anymore. What you’re doing right now is not working. Something needs to change.”
“Like what?” Jungkook spat.
“You know what,” Taehyung bit back. Jungkook was practically vibrating from rage. You knew you needed to go get someone, someone from the pack to calm the two of them down. Things were only escalating, but you couldn’t move. Your brain screamed at you to run but your legs were rooted in place. “That’s is what’s so frustrating, Jungkook. This, all of this, could be solved. She’s right there-”
“Don’t.” Jungkook stood up so fast the chair he sat on flew backwards and hit the wall with a resounding crack.
“Why?” Taehyung threw his arms up in the air. “Why not? I don’t get it-”
“Because I don’t want her!” Jungkook yelled, the force of it rang throughout the house. You had no idea who the she was that they were referring to. You assumed it was someone from the pack. It was well-known that wolves with human mates sometimes turned to other she-wolves to help with their ruts. You figured that’s what Jungkook did whenever he went away for a week. It had bothered you at first, but you knew he had his needs and that they were at a biological level. You refused to make him feel guilty or ashamed for taking care of himself.
“You don’t want her?” Taehyung was enraged. You could tell by the way he straightened his spine and unfurled himself to his full height. Jungkook bristled in response and the muscles in his back strained against the thin material of his shirt.
“No, I don’t!” Jungkook exploded. “What don’t you understand about that? I don’t want her around me. I don’t need her, I’m fine on my own. The thought of having her there when…God - it makes me physically ill.”
“She’s your girlfriend. Above all of that, your true mate. You’re seriously going to deny yourself of her, for what? Just because you don’t like having her around?”
That’s when it hit you. They weren’t talking about some random she-wolf. They were talking about you. You were the one Jungkook didn’t want. You were the one Jungkook didn’t need. You were the one he didn’t like having around. As the weight of the words sunk into your mind, you felt your chest becoming tighter and tighter.
Then, you’re heart broke right in half. You dropped the container of cookies and didn’t flinch when it shattered against the wooden slats. The sound unstuck your feet from their position on the porch and your fight or flight system took over. Without a second thought, you turned on your heel and ran.
You didn’t know if anyone was behind you, you didn’t turn around to check. Hands fumbled for the car door as you threw yourself into the drivers side. Pain ricocheted throughout your chest cavity and you struggled to breathe. Your brain was blank, the only thing your mind did was move your body to get you somewhere safe. You had to leave and you had to leave now.
Miraculously, your fingers found your keys and inserted them into the ignition on the second try. A flutter of movement occurred to the left of you but your eyes didn’t let you look that way. Instead, they focused on the rearview mirror as you reversed out of the driveway. Your right hand found the gearshift and moved it to drive. Soon, you were tearing down the street as your ears refused to register the agonized howls that echoed behind as you kept staring forward. Adrenaline pumped through your system and your body shivered in response, the splash of hormones had created a blanket of fake calm over you. The emotions, the pain, the thoughts were swirling inside of you, ready to break free and drown you, but your brain wouldn’t allow it.
It wasn’t until you reached the end of your long driveway that you felt the original spike of adrenaline fade away. Your mother was in the front, tending to the flowers, and looked up when she saw your car fly into its usual spot. She stood up and her face twisted into a frown when you got out of your seat.
“Honey, your aura…it’s concerning.” The blanket was yanked away and the pain crashed over you.
You couldn’t say a word, all you could do was collapse in your mother's arms and cry, cry, cry.
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It took you two days to calm down. The tears had stopped rolling and your shoulders no longer shook from trying to hold your sobs behind your teeth. Your mother hadn’t left your side, leaving your father to answer the door whenever someone knocked. The only person who did was Taehyung and Jimin. Jungkook never showed up.
Well, that was a lie.
Jungkook did show up every morning and night, without fail. But he never came to your doorstep.  Instead, he was in the woods behind your house, patrolling, not daring to leave the protection of the forest. A part of you wondered if he was respecting your obvious need for space or if your mother had paid a witch to set up boundary lines that didn’t allow him to cross. Either way, you were grateful that you couldn’t see him. There was an incessant tugging in your heart to be near him but you staunchly ignored it, which would’ve been impossible if you saw his achingly beautiful face.
I don’t want her. I don’t need her. Having her there makes me physically ill. Those three sentences played in a constant loop in your head, like a horror movie you couldn’t escape from. You were the protagonist who couldn’t escape the maze, but the villain wasn’t kind enough to kill you off. No matter what you did, your brain wouldn’t stop repeating those three sentences. Your mother burned sage, she pressed crystals into your palms, she muttered ritual after ritual, but nothing worked.
You hated how affected you were. You had always told yourself that you would never be the girl who’d get so wrapped up in someone else they didn’t know who they were anymore. Independence was something you prided yourself on, but you seemed to be at a complete loss now. You couldn’t stop the waves of sadness and self-hatred at your depressed state. It was amazing how empty you felt yet so full of pain at the same time. Your mind and heart couldn’t seem to decide which hurt worse; your heart for having your soulmate so obviously reject you, or your brain for trying to make sense of the situation. When did this happen? How did this happen? How had you been so blind as to not see it?
“I don’t think we’re soulmates,” you rasped to your mom on the third morning. It had been the first words you had spoken to her since you had fell into her arms. She looked up from the bundle of herbs she was smoking.
“Why do you say that?”
You stared at your hands that had curled in on themselves. “I don’t make him happy. I-I never realized how uncomfortable I made him. I wish I had known. How did I miss it?”
Your mother tutted gently and gathered you in her arms. She smelled of lavender and wax. “This is good. I’m glad you’re letting yourself have this moment. Let’s sit in this and allow yourself to be embedded here.” But you didn’t want to have this moment. You didn’t want to have any moment and you’ve felt enough to last a lifetime. Instead, you rolled over, let sleep overtake you and tried to ignore the distant howling that rattled your window pane.
By nightfall of the fourth day, you were forced out of bed. Partly by choice, partly by force. Your parents had dipped out to run to the grocery store, despite your mother’s insistence that she could stay. You and your father managed to convince her to leave and you had gotten up to wave them goodbye. Sure, your heart was broken, but the least you could do was kiss them on the cheek before they left. You had turned around to shuffle into the kitchen to try and shovel something down your dry throat when a loud knock sounded at the front door. Hesitating, you carefully peeked through the kitchen window and saw Jimin on your front doorstep, dressed in all black.
Sighing, you stumbled over and pulled the door open. You figured you couldn’t avoid them for much longer. “Hey, Jimin.”
“Christ, you look like shit.”
You huffed out a laugh as Jimin stared at you in horror, not having the energy to be offended. You also knew, in a weird way, that this was Jimin’s way of caring for you. “Yeah. My mother’s covered all the mirrors in the house.”
Jimin nodded as he glanced at you from head to toe. “I want to ask if you’re okay but…” He gestured to your gaunt frame swaddled in a heavy sweatshirt and sweatpants. For the first time in two years, they were your own clothes, not Jungkook’s.
“I’m fine, Jimin,” you heaved a heavy sigh and leaned against the doorframe. “Do you want to come in? I think my mom boiled some tea not too long ago.”
Jimin shook his head. “Can’t. Jungkook would have a fit if I got that close to you right now. I’m already pushing my luck just by showing up.” He doesn’t care, you thought bitterly, and almost said it out loud but you caught yourself at the last second. Jimin wasn’t stupid, though. He knew what you were thinking. “Hey,” he murmured, eyes going soft, “are you ready to talk about it?”
“No.” You shook your head. A wave of sadness washed over you but the telltale prick of tears didn’t come.
Jimin understood. He tucked his hands into his pockets as he rocked back onto his heels. “Are you going to talk to him?”
Letting out a heavy breath, you crossed your arms over your chest. “I know I have to. I just…I just need time.”
“Take however long you need.”
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It was another 48-hours before you finally snapped. While you had spent the majority of the two days that had passed to make yourself resemble a human being, you couldn’t focus. You couldn’t move on. Why?
Because Jungkook wouldn’t leave you alone.
His presence was constant. He circled your house every hour of ever day, the large shadow of him in wolf form darkened the trees behind your house. The howling had stopped but the pacing hadn’t. You hoped he was at least sleeping, but then you got annoyed at yourself for caring. You didn’t know why he was out there, it made no sense. Jungkook’s words were so different from his actions it made your head spin.
But, you needed to move on with your life. You had to. The only way it was going to happen was if Jungkook did too. It hurt. God, did it hurt. Yet, as sad and utterly pathetic as it sounded, you were used to the pain at this point, had resigned yourself to it. A part of you worried you wouldn’t know what to do without it.
Shaking off that depressing thought, you tugged on your rain boots and stepped outside for the first time in a week. The air was heavy with the promise of rain, the clouds low and gray. You tugged the hood up on your sweater to prevent your hair from completely frizzing out before you walked to down the back deck steps.
The backyard of your parents house was expansive. The home you had grown up in sat on top of a sloping hill that your mother had turned into her personal greenhouse. You stepped past rows of raised garden beds and pruned plants until you reached the line where the neatly mowed grass met the twisted ferns of the forest floor. As you had suspected, the ground was scorched with the evidence of past rituals. While your mother hadn’t out right admitted, you had figured someone had come and created a boundary line. It was obviously specific to Jungkook since Jimin and Taehyung were still able to visit. While your mother’s methods were extreme, you understood. As difficult as it was to move on with your life with Jungkook sequestered to the forest, you couldn’t imagine what it would’ve been like if he was within a few feet of you.
With a deep inhale, you sat down on the damp grass and waited. After a few minutes, you could hear the faint sounds of paws hitting the wet earth. The galloping got louder and louder until there was a momentary stretch of silence before it changed to footsteps.
When Jungkook emerged from the trees, you weren’t prepared. Although you knew you wouldn’t be, you still weren’t expecting it to hurt this bad. Your chest squeezed painfully at the first look of his broad form. Technically, it had been two weeks since you two had truly seen each other, the longest you’d ever gone. What hurt the most was how badly you longed for him. You wanted nothing more than to run straight into his arms, bury your face into his chest, and forget everything. Just forgive and give your heart what it wanted. But you remained firmly in place.
Jungkook looked as if he had seen a ghost. Which, to be fair, was probably true since you hadn’t seen the sun in seven days. His normally golden skin was pale and even from where you sat you could see the dark circles bruising under his eyes. Clearly, he hadn’t been sleeping. You hated that you noticed. You hated that you cared. He was dressed in all black and his chest strained against the material of his sweater. His hands were balled into tight fists at his side and the sight reminded you of why you were here.
“Hi.” Probably wasn’t the best start but it was the best you could do. Jungkook didn’t respond so you soldiered on. “I-I know you don’t want to be here, so I’ll make this quick. I just…wanted to apologize. I had no idea I made you so uncomfortable. I’m not sure how long you’ve felt this way about me, not that it really matters, but I wish you had told me sooner. Maybe things would’ve been easier for you, who knows.” You released a heavy sigh and tried to shove down the stone in your throat as you forced the next words out of your mouth. “But, all of that doesn’t matter anymore. I think I understand what you need, now. I know you loved me at one point, but I’m obviously not what you need anymore. And…t-that’s okay - I swear it is. All I want is for you to be happy, Jungkook. And I think, in order for that to happen, I need to move on. We both need to move on-”
“Stop it,” Jungkook broke in with a harsh voice that cut your sentence in half. “Stop talking.”
It felt like he had slapped you in the face. A wave of humiliation washed over you and you visibly flinched. Staggering to your feet, you locked your gaze onto your boots in an attempt to hide the tears that dripped down your nose. “I’m sorry,” you whispered, not expecting it to change anything. You began to turn away but Jungkook stopped you in your tracks, again.
“Wait, no - stop. Stop. Please…don’t go,” he pleaded. When you turned around, his eyes were frantic. Jungkook’s hand was raised from his side as if he thought about reaching out to you but something stopped him. His words were at war with one another and you were caught in the middle, at a loss for what he was trying so desperately to convey to you.
“Jungkook, I’m so confused.”
“I know. I’m sorry. God, I’m sorry.” Jungkook tucked his head into his hands before dropping down into a squat. “This is all wrong. This is all so wrong.”
You knew you should walk away. You had said your piece, it was time to move on, just as you had said. Yet, you couldn’t. It was as if your heart was tethered to him and your body couldn’t handle the pain of walking away. “Listen-”
“I don’t know what to do.” He cut you off but the bubbles of anger that had risen from being interrupted popped once you saw how lost he looked. His tattooed fingers threaded through his hair, allowing you to see the pure anguish that twisted his features. “Whenever I feel like this, I come to you. Because you always know what to do. Any situation, no matter what, you can handle it. It’s something I’ve always admired about you.”
The way he spoke to you now, so reverently and so full of awe, made your head spin. Nothing made sense.  It was such a blatant contrast to the brutality that he had spat out a week ago. As much as you wanted to believe what he said now, those stupid words could not get out of your head. It was a constant reminder that never shut up.
“I don’t know what to do either,” you admitted in a quiet voice.
“Tell me,” Jungkook begged, as if he couldn’t and refused to comprehend what you had just told him. “Tell me what to do, and I’ll do it. Whatever you want from me, I’ll give you.”
You were shaking your head before he could finish. “There’s nothing you can do, Jungkook. Nothing.”
“Don’t say that.” He stared at you, horrified. “Don’t say that to me. Please, there has to be something.”
“What could there be?” You cried. Tears streamed down your cheeks now. “You said it yourself, being near me makes you sick. Why would I stay? Why would you want me to? I refuse to make you uncomfortable anymore - so that’s that.”
“It isn’t,” Jungkook argued back. “It can’t be. I-I can’t lose you, I can’t. I need to make this right, please just let me. Please.”
But, you were tired. You were so fucking tired. You were exhausted of the emotional rollercoaster that you were on that you just wanted to crawl away and hide. All the fight seeped out of you as your shoulders slumped forward. Jungkook saw this and the blood drained from his face. You were giving up, he could see it, and it scared the shit out of him.
“Jungkook, I need to go, okay? I-I can’t do this.”
“No!” Jungkook shouted and shot up to his feet. The pure panic that choked his voice brought on a fresh set of tears that you struggled to hold back. “Just let me explain, okay? I swear to God, after you hear what I have to say, if you still want me to, I’ll let you go. I won’t fight you on it. But, please let me tell you the truth. Give me a chance to make this right. You deserve that.”
You hesitated for a moment. Deep down, you knew you should let him talk. Not because you necessarily thought he deserved to, but because he was right. You did deserve the truth, no matter how much it broke your heart. With a heavy sigh and a quick swipe of your cheeks, you nodded. Once Jungkook was sure you weren’t going to leave, he began pacing. Looking every bit like the wild animal you knew him to be but never got to see.
“Mating with a werewolf is…brutal. It’s intense, it’s painful and it isn’t pretty. It’s essentially a breeding session where I use you as a vessel to fulfill my innate biological needs. It’s not romantic, it’s not gentle. Even for she-wolves it can be too much. The thought of subjecting you to something like that - that type of pain…I couldn’t fathom it. I don’t think you understand just how precious you are to me. The image of you being battered and bruised because of me, something I did…it tormented me, day and night.” He paused for a moment, the pained look in his eyes made you shiver. You hated that he had gone through all of this turmoil on his own, and you especially hated how you never made more of an effort to try and relieve him of it.
“I couldn’t do it. That’s partially the reason I waited so long to tell you that you were my true mate. I knew ruts were something I would never expose you to even though it’s such a huge part of my life, a wolf’s life.” Jungkook looked you straight in the eye, the intensity of his dark gaze took your breath away. “I know the practices other wolves partake in when their own heats or ruts arrive. I know you know them too. But, I need you to understand something. The moment you allowed me to be yours and vice versa, I haven’t had anyone else since. I swear on my life, I’ve spent every single one of my ruts alone. I wouldn’t and I won’t do that to you.”
“Isn’t that painful, though?” Your voice cracked but neither one of you acknowledged it. While your knowledge on ruts were expansive, having done plenty of research since being with Jungkook, you had obviously never experienced one.
“It’s manageable. It’s way more painful for a she-wolf to go through her heat alone than it is for a male.” Jungkook clenched and unclenched his fists as he resumed his pacing. “The worst part is being away from you. I’ve been going through ruts since puberty, I can handle them. But not being able to be with you for a whole week…I hated it. Still do. I dread that three month mark. And as time went on, I became more and more miserable. Being apart from you was almost unbearable but the other option…I never even allowed myself to consider it.
“It came to the point where the pack was noticing. I wasn’t getting the proper pheromonal release from my ruts and it was beginning to affect those around me. Taehyung has been on my ass for months now to get over myself and take you with me during my next rut. Each time I’d give him some excuse, but it was getting harder and harder to justify what I was doing. At first, I was convinced it was because I was protecting you. But you’ve been so understanding and so patient with me and my life, those excuses were becoming useless. Eventually, I think it was because I was protecting myself. I was - am - so scared. I’m terrified that I could hurt you when I’m like that. That I wouldn’t be able to notice or worse, ignored, if something happened to you. Living with that type of fear became debilitating. So, I just kept my mouth shut and kept you away from that part of me.”
Jungkook shook his head and chuckled humorlessly. “Now I know that was the worst possible thing I could do. That I was just hurting you more. What you walked into last Sunday was a culmination of my frustrations that I was refusing to deal with. While it’s not a valid reason, I’m well aware of that, I need you to know that what you heard was not the truth. It couldn’t be further from it. Because the truth is that I’m hopelessly in love with you and the thought of being without you hurts worse than I ever thought was possible.”
It wasn’t the first nor would it be the last time that Jungkook left you speechless. It took you a full minute to process what he had said. Jungkook granted you the silence although he became increasingly more agitated as time passed. His boots scuffed the dead leaves that littered the ground and his pacing led him closer to the ashes that lay before your feet. Then, he’d suddenly stalk off with a growl as he was forced to keep away.
“I-” you cleared your throat around the lump that had found a home there. “I had no idea. This whole time…I thought it was because you didn’t want me.”
“God, no.” Jungkook swore heavily as his muscles bunched and coiled beneath his clothes. “The - the fact that…you - fuck. I’m so sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. That’s not it, that’s not it at all. You’re my dream girl, you’re the love of my life, and I want you every second of every day.”
Maybe it’s because you were emotionally drained and had no mental strength left. Maybe, you needed to hear those words from Jungkook more than you realized. Whatever the reason was, it wasn’t worth trying to figure out an explanation as you sunk to the ground and burst into tears.
Jungkook lost it across from you. Broken whines stained the air as he carded through his hair anxiously. He kept trying to get to you, to try to soothe you. But the boundary was unfortunately doing its job and each attempt was met with failure. Curses were spat out until eventually, he got as close as the boundary would let him and fell to his knees. He began spewing whatever came to mind first, unsure of what to do. All he knew was that you were crying because of him and there was absolutely nothing he could do about it. He thought hearing you cry from your bedroom window was torture, but nothing could compare to hearing you break down in front of him. Nothing. “Fuck, fuck, fuck. I’m sorry…please, I’m so sorry. I - don’t cry, darling. Please don’t. I’m so sorry I hurt you, I didn’t mean to, I swear.”
It wasn’t tears of heartbreak that leaked from your eyes. Instead, it was tears of relief. While your heart had wholly accepted his words as the truth, the logical part of you reminded yourself that the two of you had way more talking to do. This was far from over, but the relief of knowing that he loved you and he was yours…it was indescribable.
You finally lifted your head up and were shocked to find Jungkook’s cheeks glistening with moisture. Your only thought was to comfort him as you scrambled forward to do just that. Instead of feeling his smooth skin against the palm of your hand, you were blocked by what felt like a wall although nothing stood in your way. Frowning, you realized with a start that the boundary worked both ways. Jungkook let out a frustrated growl as he glared at the ashes that was stopping both of you from getting what you wanted. It was silent for a few moments until an idea popped into your head.
“Wait here,” you announced before jumping up and taking off for the house. Ignoring Jungkook’s distressed cry, you ran inside. You yanked your car keys off from their designated hook and quickly typed out a text to your parents to let them know where you were going before spinning around and sprinting back outside. Jungkook was where you left him, although he stumbled to his feet when he saw you reappear.
“I’m going to your house,” you announced, breathless. “No witch is stupid enough to go that far into werewolf territory. If you want to talk to me there, then follow me.”
Jungkook stared at you for a heartbeat until the words you spoke clicked. “Y-yeah. Yes. Okay. I’ll be there.”
With a curt nod, you ran to your car. For the first time in a week, a faint sprout of hope bloomed in your chest.
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It was the longest and shortest ten minutes of your life. The drive to Jungkook’s seemed to last a lifetime but also was over within a blink of an eye. The tears had stopped flowing by the time you pulled your car into his driveway, but you felt the telltale prick in your eyes when you saw him burst from the trees. Your heart ached as his long legs ate up the distance between you two as you wrestled with your seatbelt and threw the car into park. By the time you freed yourself, he was at the hood of your car.
The two of you stared at each other for a few breathless moments. You weren’t sure who moved first, but it didn’t matter as you crashed into each other’s arms. The moment his searing warmth enveloped you, you dissolved into another puddle of sobs. The feeling of his thick arms banded across your back, his torso molded to yours, and his hair tickling your ear, felt so right. Another wave of crippling relief washed over you and you practically melted against Jungkook. But he held you up, just like he always had.
He leaned against the front bumper while his hands were everywhere. Cradling your head into his neck, smoothing over your hips, or running circles over your shoulders. He was crying, you could feel the tears dampening your hair. But you were soaking his shirt so no one was in any position to complain.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered.
“Don’t,” Jungkook hissed fiercely as he squeezed you tighter. “Don’t apologize. This isn’t your fault, not in the slightest.”
“Kook,” you sighed and pulled your head back to get a good look at him. “It takes two to tango.”
“Not this time,” he argued. “You’ve put up with so much. You’re everything I could’ve asked for and more. It was my own fears that got in the way and created this mess. And I’m so sorry for that, darling. I’m so fucking sorry.”
You shushed him gently, running your thumbs over his cheeks to swipe at the dried tears. “I know you’re sorry. I believe you.”
Jungkook dipped his head further into your touch with a pleased rumble vibrating through his chest. He kissed your palm gently, sniffing at your wrist. It made you giggle. “Missed that,” Jungkook mumbled as he stared at you with stars in his eyes. “Missed you. Missed you so much.”
A fresh wave of tears cascaded down your cheeks. You were positive that you looked like a mess, hair in a knotted bun, face red and puffy and you kept sniffling every two seconds. But Jungkook looked at you as if you held the world in your hands. “Missed you too,” you murmured in return. “Please, next time, just talk to me. I may not have the answers you’re looking for all the time, but I’ll always be here to listen.”
“I know,” Jungkook whispered. “There won’t be a next time, promise. If I happen to be stupid enough to put us in this position again, I give you full permission to punch me in the face.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” You lifted yourself onto your toes to brush your lips against his, dropping back down to your feet when his head chased after yours. “Or maybe I just won’t kiss you for a week.”
Jungkook’s eyes widened comically and he actually looked terrified. “I’d rather you just punched me in the face.” You tilted your head back and laughed. Jungkook tugged you closer and nosed your throat before peppering gentle kisses along the exposed skin. Sighing happily, you tilted your head to allow him better access and rested your cheek on his shoulder.
“I love you,” you said quietly. Jungkook froze for a split second before he sank against you. Squeaking in shock, you scrambled to brace yourself against the sudden weight pressing you towards the house.
“Say it again,” Jungkook pleaded. You couldn’t deny him. Dusting feather light kisses to the shell of his ear, you repeated those three words again, and again, and again. Each time you did, Jungkook held you a little tighter and cried a little harder.
Eventually, you’re murmured promises became softer and softer until the two of you just enjoyed each others presence. “C’mon,” you finally whispered as you started to lift yourself off of him. Jungkook growled and refused to let you move an inch farther. “Kook, come on. Let’s go inside. Your ass must be numb by now.”
“Don’t care,” he grumbled but he at least shuffled forward a bit more so that your combined weight wasn’t squashing his ass against your car.
“You might say that now, but you won’t be saying that later.”
Jungkook grunted at your logic but he at least raised his head and looked at you with the sweetest eyes. “Please tell me you’re staying.”
Giggling, you asked, “do you want me to?”
“Obviously,” he scoffed. “I want you here forever.” Jungkook tilted his head thoughtfully. “Actually, you should just move in with me.”
Christ, this boy was going to give you whiplash. You couldn’t help but laugh. “Jungkook, we just made up. The whole reason we were in this mess is because of poor communication. Don’t you think we should work on that first before anything else?”
“But…we could work on communication all the time if we’re together 24/7.” Despite his pout, you knew he wasn’t totally serious. Although you were sure it was going to come up again.
“Alright, you maniac,” you said fondly. “Take me to bed.” Jungkook’s chest rumbled happily as he lifted you up and wrapped your legs around his trim waist.
It wasn’t a long walk to his bedroom, but the exhaustion of the past week caught up to you and the gentle rocking of his steps lulled you into a serene state. Not quite asleep, but not quite awake either. You were aware when Jungkook placed you on his bed, practically engulfed in his scent. The last thing you remember before falling asleep was the words Jungkook pressed into your hair has he slid in behind you.
“Love you forever, my darling girl.”
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©jcwritings Do not repost, translate, or use my stories without my permission.
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delugguk · 14 days ago
A Little Help
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PAIR: idol!jungkook x reader
GENRE: smut. Best friends to fuck buddies kinda?
WARNINGS: pure filth dick riding, penis slap/teasing pussy lmao, mention of a blowjob, curses and uhh I think that's all?
W/C: 1.3k
SUMMARY: jungkook always spent his birthdays alone and with his hand. You, like the good friend you are decide to change that for him at least once but what happens once things start getting a little too.. out of hand?
A/N: helloo this is kinda like a comeback?? I think I'll finally be able to post the many fics l have! I'm so excited*-* and so.. of course I wanted to start by posting this even tho it's a bit late for jungkook's birthday! My beloved man ♡3♡. Anyways, enjoy!! As always, let me know what you think.. this may or may not have a part two👀.
A/N.2: this story switches between OC's pov and jungkook's pov!
It's his birthday and you wanted to give him a surprise. He usually spended his birthdays alone as he didn't have anyone to really spend with but he got a message from you, his beloved friend. A friend he loved way too much but there was nothing more than that. The message said you wanted to give him something for his birthday. It doesn't matter how many times he said that you didn't need to, you insisted until he accepted. He recognized then your efforts and charm to compile him into anything. But he did not exactly expected you to give such.. gift. Or more like.. to ask for such thing as a.. "gift".
"Because I want to?" You said as something obvious.
"But we are friends?"
"So? You always spend your birthdays alone and with your hand so whats better than me to change that?" You said as if it was something easy.
"But— wouldn't that destroy our friendship?"
You laughed at that.
"Jungkook— really? 'destroy'?" Big laugh. "You're acting funny right now— don't act as if we haven't kissed before!"
"Yeah but that's different! We were a lot younger back then and— that doesn't compares to what you want right now?" He said feeling defensive but you could notice the little humorous eyes in his face.
You roll your eyes at him, scoffing, "do you want this or not?"
He contemplates for a few seconds but.. how could he deny this.. offer? Or whatever you could call this.. h—he can admit he might have.. a liiittle crush on you ever since Jimin introduced you to him ok? But that's! It! — it's not like he has imagined you jumping or sucking on his dick befo— no! He could never!! r-right? -anyways-
He knew that if he let this happen he.. he'll want more ok? He hasn't had any pussy for so long and you.. to be his first after a long time? Damn. He must be dreaming right now.
"____.. You know how stupid is to even ask that," he giggles. "of course I... agree." He said in a lower voice.
"Agree or want this?" You keep teasing him which that's why you gain an eye roll from him. "I.." sighs, "want this".
"Let's do this then!"
And with those last words here you were, getting head from your best friend.. your.. BEST. FRIEND.
how crazy.. right?
but damn was she this good. You wonder why you hadn't done this before.
"Stop or else I'll cum" you said between teeth.
leaving your dick with a loud pop she ask, "don't you want that?"
"Yes— but not yet" you moan. "fuck. Don't I get to feel you?"
"that wasn't part of the plan" damn she's such a tease. Who'll knew.
"Fuck that shit ____, let me fuck you right now" you put her on your lap and you feel the way her pussy clenched as soon as you introduced a finger in it.
"you really wanted this huh?" He gives a little slap to your clit "so fucking wet.."
The noises made him go crazier and needyer. Who'll knew you'll be so fucking hot.
He takes your underwear away sticking his dick out, "seat on me." your voice is so demanding but you couldn't control yourself. She wanted your birthday present to be like this? ha.. of course you'll take advantage of that. Something like this might not happen twice.
the moment she introduces your cock to her pussy... damn. Everything was spinning around, you swear you've never felt such a good pussy like hers. "So fucking warm.." head leaning backwards, you start fucking her fast after she adjusted to you.
Who knew he'll feel so good.. fuck—you thought to yourself—
"so big.."
"yeah baby? You love it don't you?"
Goddamn it. Why does he has to sound so fucking hot and desperate? It was truly making you feel crazier over him.
When you proposed this idea to him you did not thought about fucking him. Just wanted to give him a blowjob, that's it. But damn.. He was so hard and his cock looked so big... head red and pretty.. You could not resist him anymore. You knew jungkook was hot but to see him in this new light.. this side of him.. it was a fucking new experience.
I'll never look at him the same—you thought.
"Let me-" you lean closer to him wrapping your arms around his neck. "Let me do it for you, it-it's your gift after all" you said to him but he manhandled your hips and fucked you rough.
"fuck— jungkook- really- plea-please"
"Hmm— soo fucking good, sshit" he moans on your ear and a pool of new arousal hits you. "God damn It!" His left hand slaps your ass. "do I turn you on this much baby?"
You are moaning like crazy, can't even find the right timing to say any coherent word. His pounding on you feeling so delicious.
"How bad you wanted me to fuck you huh?" He says with another slap this time taking his cock out. "Go to the bed. All fours." It's embarrasing how you obey to him so fast.
Already splashed in his bed.. ass all up, face buried on his white blankets. His weight tells you he's right behind you. Cock teasing your walls.. very slowly.. up and down, up and down. It makes you more horny your sweet arousal falling through your legs. -jungkook couldn't believe it-
He slaps your clit this time with his cock to continue teasing you with his slow movements.
"Tell me.. how long were you waiting for this?" He says massaging your ass.
"This ass is making me feel crazy— it's so perfect" another slap. this time to both of your ass cheeks. "Answer me!"
You giggle your ass to his dick trying to make him fuck you, but he slaps your ass again and demands, "I told you to answer baby.."
"gghh—so long. I've wanting this for so long"
"Is that so?" He softly chuckles in arousal. "then why you didn't tell me sooner hm?"
"I—" you manage to give yourself pleasure to your clit sliding up and down with his cock. It got jungkook fascinated with how eager you were for him. "I didn't know ho-"
"hmm, what's important now is that we get to do it in this right moment don't you agree?" He says and as soon as he does he introduces his cock into you making you cry a moan. "Oh! fuck yes—"
"If I knew you'll be like this," he took his cock out to introduce his cock again hard and deeper making you jump.
"this eager.." and again.
"needy.." and again.
"wet fucking pussy" and.. again.
"I would've asked to fuck you by myself"
And with that he picks up his rapid pace. A hand on your clit and you feel closer to cum.
"If you cum— please cum inside, please" you said desperate, out of breath, fucking yourself back in his cock making him stop for a few seconds to just admire the way you do it. "You're such a good girl" and begins fucking you again. "Alright baby, I'll do that"
You take your head to the side to look at him and smiling at him you say, "for your gift".
He smiles back out of breath, hair sticking to his forehead, lips red.. you both drenched in sweat— he leans closer, hands tracing your back to put you down fucking you way deep and teasingly hard—he kisses you. "the best gift."
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blu-joons · a month ago
You Fall Asleep At The Studio Together ~ Jeon Jungkook
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With the final preparations coming together for the latest album release, all of the boys were on the verge of exhaustion as they brought the last few details together. Jungkook especially had been struggling, and so when he found you sat on one of the sofas in the studio, he couldn’t wait to curl into your side and try and close his eyes for a short while.
The peace was nice, but as ever, it only lasted for so long until the door was pushed open with the six other boys all joining you in the room, ready to get back to work. Despite the volume, the two of you stayed fast asleep, without a single movement from either of you in response to their noisy arrival.
Jimin was the first to glance across at the two of you, letting go of a soft chuckle. “Look at how adorable they are,” he spoke to anyone who was willing to pay attention to him.
“Kook looks so content,” Yoongi added, quietening his footsteps down as he walked around you both to get prepared.
As loud as they wanted to be at times, when they saw the two of you cosied up and resting, they quickly fell quiet. However, as Namjoon tried to reach over you both to grab one of the guitar stands, his thigh went crashing into the top of your head, shaking you awake.
“I’m so sorry,” he instantly whispered as your eyes shot open to see him above you.
“Don’t worry about,” you smiled, covering your mouth with your free hand as you let go of a yawn, catching Jungkook in the corner of your eye. “He’s so exhausted.”
Your eyes looked around the room to see everyone else looking across at you too, smiling weakly at them all. You knew deadlines were tight, but as you tried to shake Jungkook awake, they all quickly called out for you to stop and leave him.
As a small hum came from him, you moved your hand across to run over his head in the hope it would calm him into going back to sleep.
“Are you guys sure you’re alright with us laying here?” You questioned, feeling guilty for taking up so much space, and plenty of their time with them already so busy.
“Don’t worry, we’d rather he rested for a while and was ready to record with a healthy voice, he seems comfy with you too.”
Your eyes looked down at him once again, taking in the tight hold he had on you. His arm was draped around your stomach to be able to cling into your side, with his head buried into the crook of your neck to hide away.
“I’m sure he’ll wake up soon,” you told them all only for them all to assure once you again that you had no reason to apologise or feel bad about things.
As you spoke, the figure beside you slowly began to stir, “who will wake up soon?”
Your head shook as Jungkook’s eyes slowly opened, letting go of a groan in response to how bright the room was. Laughter came from the others in the room too as Jungkook turned onto his side to make himself more comfortable.
“Nice of you to join us,” Hobi instantly joked, leaning forwards in his chair, “not like you to be sleeping on the job, or are you getting old?”
Another groan escaped from Jungkook, glancing up to you for a little bit of help, but you could only shrug back at him, refusing to take sides or get involved in a group argument.
“I didn’t realise if we brought our girlfriends to the studio, it meant we could do whatever,” Taehyung then spoke up with a smile, “that’s a communal sofa in case you’ve forgotten.”
Jungkook moved his feet up so that there was room on the end of the sofa for someone to sit, only for all of the boys to stay where they were, giving him plenty of space to wake up.
“In case you’ve forgotten, we also have work to do,” Namjoon reminded the group, pointing to the schedule that was hung up on the wall, “not all of us have the luxury of napping.”
As equipment began to be moved around the room a little more carelessly than before, you began to feel pretty helpless as you sat on the sofa. Jungkook was still waking himself up whilst the others set up, smiling across at you.
“I should get going,” you whispered as his hand relaxed against your shoulder.
Instantly his head shook back at you, “you don’t have to, you’re welcome to stay.”
“You’re the resident pillow around here now,” Jimin interjected, overhearing your conversation, “who else are we supposed to sleep on?”
Jungkook shot him a glare as he passed by with a microphone stand in hand, unable to hide the smirk on his face at the maknae’s expense.
“Just so you know, I’m the only person who can sleep on you,” Jungkook quickly pointed out to you.
Your head nodded back at him, running your hand through his hair to try and adjust the messy strands that had fallen in front of his face as he slept.
“I’ll stay for a bit and make sure that you stay on schedule,” you then informed him, “and also make sure that you don’t fall asleep anymore, you’re far enough behind getting this album done as it is without making things worse.”
A reluctant head nodded back at you, still torn between whether he was really ready to record if he’d rather to continue to lay on you for a while.
“Are you really still tired after that power nap?”
“No, I just need to wake myself up, that’s all.”
You watched on as Jungkook rubbed the sleep out of his eyes before hitting against his cheeks in the hope that it would wake himself up. He knew he needed to work, but the thought of laying back down on your shoulder was even more appealing.
As you followed his gaze, you could see exactly where he was looking, placing your fingertip against his forehead to quickly stop him leaning down. A sigh came from him as he realised that he was caught, sitting back up as if nothing was happening.
“I just want to sleep forever,” he sniggered, moving your hand away so he could rub over his face once again to wake up.
Your head shook back at him as the final preparations were made to start recording. “Soon. When you’re done, I promise.”
With Hoseok the first to record, the rest of the boys all sat down in the room with you. Jungkook sat one side of you, with Jimin on the other, knowing straight away that he had something up his sleeve to wind Jungkook up.
“Don’t you dare,” Jungkook called out as he noticed who was sat beside you, and the head that was slowly leaning down to rest against your shoulder. “No one gets to relax on Y/N except for me, go and get your own girlfriend if you’re that jealous.”
Your hand reached across to push Jimin away, feeling arms come from either side of you also pushing him aside, ensuring that he kept his distance. The arms stayed around your waist once Jimin was away, moving you across until you were positioned in Jungkook’s lap.
His head rested against your shoulder as he made himself comfortable, “I always knew that I couldn’t trust any of them around you. You’re my pillow, no one else’s.”
“Yes Kook, I’m all yours.”
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softyoongiionly · 2 months ago
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It was always him, wasn’t it?
Pairing: Jungkook x Reader
Genre: best friends to lovers au, slight angst, fluff, smut (18+ only please)
Warnings: brief mentions of a past relationship with unhealthy dynamics, an extremely brief allusion to the reader’s grandpa passing away, swearing, marking/ biting, dirty talking, unprotected sex, Jeon Jungkook. 
Word Count: 7.9k
A/N: hi hi!!! This is just a little summer treat for you! I saw blueberry jk again recently and I was thrown into this slightly unorganized plot lol. I hope you enjoy and I love youuuu ^-^ (unedited because I was too excited)
Jungkook is annoyed.
Like, really annoyed.
He’s sitting across from you at your grandma’s breakfast table, doing his absolute best not to roll his eyes as you tell the story of your nightmare weekend.
“…yeah, I guess I just thought things were different between us. I understand he wants to focus on his career but-“
“Right, what was it you said he did again, dear?” Your grandma asks the question with a rolling pin in her hand as she works at the giant pile of dough in front of her.
“He’s in between jobs right now, he says he has a really great idea for a tech startup, but he says the economy isn’t in a good place to pitch something like that.”
Your grandmother glances up to catch Jungkook’s expression, the two of them wordlessly exchanging their distaste.
“I see.” She replies but the sugar in her voice is stale, “Keep going love, I’m sorry for interrupting.”
You’re oblivious to the atmosphere in the room as you smile to yourself. Jungkook takes a deep breath through his nose as he notices that it doesn’t reach your eyes.
He hasn’t been this upset in a long time.
But he does his best to keep calm.
At least for now.
“It’s ok,” You assure her, moving the eggs around your plate, “We were supposed to go dancing, but then he decided that it was best that we stayed inside because of the rain…which I understood but-“ You’re hesitating and Jungkook feels the uncomfortable swirl of anger swimming up his spine, “-it was only drizzling. Plus, the place we were supposed to go was inside.”
“Did you say that to him?”
It is the first time Jungkook has spoken during this conversation, and he is surprised at the amount of venom that seeps into his tone. Being his best friend, you notice right away, your eyes shooting up in his direction.
“Y-yeah. I mean- I pointed out that we would be inside the whole time and he just sort of brushed it off. Later on, you know when we started arguing- he ended up telling me that he didn’t like the dress I brought with me.”
Jungkook’s strong jaw clenches and unclenches, “The blue one?”
You nod, perplexed by the intensity in his eyes. Your grandma’s sugary voice breaks the tension as she comes around to ensure that she heard you correctly.
“You’re kidding!” She places her hand on her heart, “That dress was made for you. How could he possibly-“ Her eyes seem to light up in realization, “He didn’t go dancing with you because he didn’t like your dress?”
You feel quite embarrassed as she takes your hand, and although you can feel the familiar sting of sadness in your eyes, you reign in your tears.
There is no reason to worry them further, you think.
“I guess so.”
“He’s an idiot.” Jungkook says plainly, his voice nearly void of any emotion.
“I concur.” Your grandma says, smoothing her thumb over the back of your knuckles, “Honey, please tell me you aren’t seeing this man again.” She hesitates and worries momentarily about decorum before deciding to toss it to the curb, “He sounds like an asshole.”
Strong language only leaves your grandmother’s lips on rare occasions and you can’t help but chuckle every time it happens.
She seems to relax at the sound of your laughter, but Jungkook’s posture remains the same as he awaits your response.
“I don’t know. He told me to call him when I-“ Your fingers come up to make air-quotes, “ ‘adjust my expectations.’”
“The hell’s that supposed to mean?”
Jungkook’s voice is deeper than normal, his arms crossing over his chest as he looks at you in disgust.
It’s slightly intimidating as you aren’t used to seeing him like this, but you persist anyway, wanting to see the end of this conversation.
“When he started arguing, I told him I would expect the man I’m with to want to show me off no matter what. You know…” You can hear your voice getting smaller, “…to want to dance with me regardless of what my dress looks like.”
Jungkook feels his heart break a little as he sees the crushed look on your face, but his frustration is still eclipsing all of his other emotions.
“And he told you to lower your expectations?” Jungkook clarifies.
“That’s horseshit.” Your grandmother scoffs, “When your grandfather was around, may he rest in peace, he took me dancing every chance he had.”
Her language makes you giggle softly to yourself, but you avert your eyes again, feeling rather ashamed that you spent so much time with someone who clearly didn’t appreciate you.
“I’m not sure if I can find the kind of love you and grandpa had…” You murmur, fingertips picking at the frayed ends of the tablecloth, “Chase told me that love wasn’t really like that. I tried to tell him that I had…” You hesitate, not looking across the table, “…felt it before but he wasn’t really interested in my perspective…”
As you’re shaking your head, Jungkook begins shaking his too. He adjusts his posture before helplessly trying to reign in his wayward tongue once again, “Where is he staying at again?”
“Jungkook…” Your grandma chides fondly, sensing his frustration growing by the second, “…would you mind going out to the garden? I don’t think I picked enough blueberries for a third pie, and I promised the Kims’ one by tomorrow morning.”
When you meet his gaze once again, his tongue is pressed somewhat aggressively into his cheek and he seems to hesitate at your grandma’s request. He doesn’t want to leave your side but he doesn’t know how much more of this conversation he can take.
He merely nods, setting his fork down on the table and wiping his hands on the cloth napkin before jerking his chin at you, “You wanna come? It’s supposed to storm in a bit.” When he sees your eyes meet his own, he can’t help but feel his heart skip a bit in his chest. He’s never done well with you looking directly at him like this, but the hurt wading around in them makes it much worse. He offers you his signature smirk, trying to lighten your mood, “Now I know you’re sad and all, but there’s no way my Y/N would pass up an opportunity to watch a storm roll in.”
The combination of his smirk and the phrase ‘my Y/N’ sends your heart into a frenzy that you’d really love to ignore. But when he reaches his tattooed fingers out towards you, you don’t really have much of a choice.
“Go on, dear. It will be good to get some fresh air.” She looks pointedly at Jungkook, “Make sure you two are in before the lightening…”
Jungkook nods, “Yes ma’am.” His smirk fades quickly when he feels your hand in his own, his fingers almost forgetting how to work.
With a kiss to your grandma’s cheek, you push away from your place at the table and begin to trail behind Jungkook as he leads you outside. Holding hands with your childhood best friend is nothing new. The two of you would often run haphazardly through the very same yard that you’re heading out to, spending hours lost in the same daydream. Foolishly, the two of you believed that life would be so much like playing pretend. However, you had come to realize that all those years running through the fields on your grandmother’s farm, chasing after bad guys, ruling over imaginary kingdoms, and pretending to harness the lightening in the skies above you, couldn’t have prepared you for the world out there.
When you texted Jungkook to meet you here, he knew something had gone wrong. He had been in the middle of hanging out with some of his other friends he met in college, but he quickly excused himself and rushed over here.
As usual, you tried to pretend like it wasn’t a big deal. You tried to play it off like you just wanted to see him, like your grandmother just needed help baking her famous blueberry pies, like you only wanted to catch up…
But he knew it had been about him.
Through the shiver brought on by the cold evening air, you murmur, “Are you mad at me?”
Jungkook’s eyes are narrowed, his royal blue hair beginning to move along with the wind as he tries to scout the location of your grandmother’s blueberry patch.
She moves it around every year.
“Why would I be mad at you?”
He doesn’t look at you as he begins leading the two of you towards the garden off to the left.
“I don’t know…” You feel uneasy now, “You just seem upset about something.”
Jungkook knows that he won’t be able to hide his feelings from you for very long, but he does his best to deflect the attention back on you.
“I’m just worried about you.” He assures you, still refusing to spar a glance towards you, “I’ve been worried about you…”
You sigh, “I’m ok…I just-“ Shrugging, you squeeze his hand in attempt to reassure him, “-got burned, that’s all.”
He pauses his movements, the clouds beginning to rumble above you as he lets go of your hand. He turns towards you, a slightly wounded expression on his face, “You don’t look burned, Y/N. You look broken.”
Your hand remains up in the air for a moment before you quickly bring it back to your side, “Gee thanks. You really know how to make a girl feel special…”
Jungkook shoots a cold glance your way as he opens the gate to the garden, “You know that isn’t what I mean. I just don’t understand why you didn’t tell any of us what was going on. You two were together for a year, Y/N. Every one of us just thought he swept you off your feet…” A bit of pain flashes through his eyes, “…me included.”
“I just didn’t want you to worry about me.” You explain, the steady grip of uneasiness slowly intertwining through your sense, “I felt silly for falling for giving into the life that he lived so quickly. When things started to go sideways, I didn’t know how to ask for help, I didn’t want to be a burden on anyone…it really wasn’t that bad honestly. We just didn’t click-“
“Why are you lying to me?” His tone begins to match his wounded expression, as he stops near the beginning of the blueberries. The storm clouds are rolling in from the background, almost as if they could feel the rising tension in the air.
“I’m- I’m not. I told you everything that happened-“
“Y/N,” Jungkook interrupts you, shaking his head, his eyes holding something you can’t quite decipher, “we don’t have to talk about this anymore. I don’t want to disrespect your boundaries, or invade your privacy but…” He points a tattooed finger in your direction, “…don’t lie to me, not after all these years…”
For whatever reason, you are compelled to reach out for his finger. Wrapping your own digits around his, you lower it until it’s pointed towards the ground. Holding it for a moment, the two of you regard one another in complete silence. His chest rises a bit quicker than normal as he attempts to calm down but for the most part you only notice the pain his pretty eyes.
And the moles upon his pretty face…
All you do is nod and give his finger a light squeeze before releasing it.
And Jungkook hates it when you do, wishing for you to follow through for once, wishing for you to find your way back through his fingers…
“So, we drop it then?” He checks, his voice much softer now.
When you nod a second time, he offers an unfamiliar smile in your direction. It pains you to know that he is holding back the things he wants to say, but you understand why he does it.
This is just the way things are now.
“We better get started.” He notes before a small smirk finds its way onto his mouth, “Your grandma is going to bake me into those pies if I keep you outside during the storm.”
His joke finally gets you to crack a smile, “For a woman that’s lived in this town her whole life, she still hasn’t managed to figure out how thunderstorms work.”
“What do you mean she doesn’t know how thunderstorms work? Y/N? Have you already forgotten Uncle Earl? Do you want HIM to tell you how thunderstorms work???” Jungkook does his best at imitating your grandma’s voice causing the two of you to erupt in the first bout of genuine laughter of the evening.
Your Great Uncle Earl was hit by lightening when your grandma and him were growing up. According to him, he had to go to the hospital for a bit and now has the coolest scar known to man. According to your grandma however, he nearly died (twice) and can no longer stand within 10 feet of an electrical appliance.
Neither of which are true, but she was four years old when it happened.
Kids say the darnest things.
“She’s ridiculous…” You chuckle to yourself as you bend down to inspect the bushels of blueberries. The sun has treated them well this year but now that the stormy season was beginning to roll in full force, your grandmother would likely begin planting something else in their place. “It’s going to be a bad one tonight, you’re not driving home are you?”
He shakes his head as he gathers a few berries in his palm before tossing them into the burlap pouch he brought along with him, “No. My mom would kill me if I tried to drive in this weather even though-“
“You totally could…” You finish his sentence for him, a smirk on your lips, “You’re forgetting about the time you and I tried to drive to hills to watch the flood and we got stuck on Route 14…and you cried…a lot.”
Jungkook is throwing a blueberry at your face by the end of your sentence, causing you to laugh all over again, “And you cried with me! We were holding each other on the side of the road until the fire department showed up…”
What Jungkook won’t talk about however is how desperately he wanted to kiss you in that old pickup truck. The two of you were much younger then but he can still vividly remember the way you huddled up against him, the way your fingers gripped the material of his hoodie, the way your lips were dangerously close to his own…
You are laughing despite the fact that he was calling you out, your eyes lighting up fondly at the memory of the firemen literally telling you to just drive slowly back down the hill behind them. It wasn’t nearly as dangerous as you had made it out to be, but the thunder roaring in the distance whilst you and Jungkook huddled close together on the side of the road is still fresh in your mind.  
“I was only crying because you started crying first.” You counter, throwing the blueberry back at him. But as you do, Jungkook opens his mouth and catches it right on the center of his tongue, a quirk on his lips forming as he does.
“Jungkook! That landed on the ground! You’re so gross…” You laugh, eyes widening in disbelief.
His smirk forms fully as he shrugs, chewing away at the soiled berry, “It’s just extra nutrients from the Earth Y/N, relax.”
Jungkook snickers just as he did when the two of you were younger when you turn your nose up in disgust.
“It’s just extra nutrients from the Earth Y/N, relax.” You mimic him whilst deepening your voice. He snickers again, his eyes lingering on you even as you turn your attention back towards the berries.
God, he really does think you are the prettiest woman he has ever seen.
Silence settles over you once more as you both focus on the task at hand. The clouds looming in the distance are growing darker with the onslaught of precipitation and stirring uneasily beneath the weight of the pressure building up inside of them. This was the first storm of the season and according to the weather reports, it’s supposed to be a doozy.
Normally, silence between you and Jungkook is comfortable. After knowing each other for so long, you could basically do anything together and feel content. You never needed to fill the air with small talk or unnecessary anecdotes; being with Jungkook felt very much like breathing.
However, today was different. Today the tension stuck to every surface of your skin and made you very aware that not only were you keeping something from Jungkook, but that he knew about it.
You take a deep breath in a futile attempt to quell your anxiety and Jungkook’s eyes are immediately on you. They seem to slice through your carefully crafted exterior, which is something he perfected long ago.
But he doesn’t say anything, he knows he doesn’t need to.
He just waits until-
“He told me not to see you anymore.” You admit, your eyes fixated firmly on the garden floor, your heartbeat rising to a dangerous level.
Jungkook’s eyes widen. He knew there was more to your breakup with Chase, but he never anticipated that it had anything to do with him.
“He said that-“ You swallow the fear rising in your throat, “-I had a choice; I could either call and tell you that I never wanted to see you again or…”
There is a dangerous amount of moisture collecting in the sky that mirrors what is occurring in your very own pupils. You don’t want to cry but you don’t know if you have a choice.
Everything was riding on this moment and your introduction to this topic was already so messy.
“…Or?” Jungkook presses gently, ignoring the fury he felt for this man that was supposed to be taking care of you.
You don’t dare to move your eyes from the soil on the floor as you nearly choke out the rest of your sentence.
“Or I had to call and tell you that I wasn’t in love with you…”
Jungkook’s own heart ceases to beat for the time being, the rest of his body trying its best to process what you’ve just said to him. But as intelligent as Jungkook is, he doesn’t always understand subtlety.
With a humorless laugh, your attention is finally brought up towards him, your expression rife with confusion.
“Is that why you brought me here then? To tell me this in person?” He sets the basket down beside you, wiping his hands on the overalls adorning his body, “You didn’t think this was something you could have texted me?”
You look confused now, “Why would I text you something like this?”
Every inch of his body is covered in defensiveness now, the normally smooth features that adorn his face are hardened beneath his assumptions as he slowly places distance between the two of you.
“Did you really think this is the place I’d want to find out? I mean-“ He barks a laugh once more, his arms crossing over his chest, “-I would think you’d have a little more common sense than that.” You’re thoroughly wounded now, your chest tightening with the force of his attitude, whilst your mind is swimming with confusion.
“I don’t know why you’re being so mean about this.” You mumble, your eyes flickering between the dark clouds and the storm in front of you, “I didn’t think you’d react like this…”
“Yeah well…” He scoffs, looking rather disgusted, “…I guess you don’t know me that well, do you?”
His words cut through your heart like one of those 1,000 degree knives that were going viral on the internet a few years ago, and you literally feel a lump in your throat forming as he begins to walk away.
Whichever force is controlling the weather seems to have a sense of humor because just as the peak of your heartbreak begins, it starts to rain.
“Jungkook!” You call after him, trying to move quickly despite the numbness in your limbs, “Is this really how you feel? After all of this time?”
He whips around towards you, his eyes hard with his defenses, “Is this really how you feel? For god’s sake Y/N, I knew you were a little clueless, but I didn’t realize how bad it was.”
The storm above your heads is intensifying slowly as the rain stains the expressions on your faces.
“What are you even talking about???” You are growing irritated with the way he is speaking too but more so than anything, you are thoroughly dumbfounded at his reaction.
Jungkook’s cerulean hair is getting shaggier with the onslaught of rain leaving the clouds, but he doesn’t have the patience to care, he is too upset to care about anything at the moment.
“Did you really think this would be easy for me? You thought that you’d just call me out to this spot, our spot, and you’d let me down easy? Is that it?” His voice breaks up a bit at the end as he shakes his head. You can tell that he’s about to cry by the way he keeps pursing his lips, and it’s all clicking for you now.
“Jungkook,” You croak, shaking your own head, “I didn’t ask you to come here to let you down easy. I asked you to come here because I couldn’t agree to either of the things, he asked of me.”
He’s already turning away from you when your words bring his movements to a halt. Slowly and in the middle of the downpour, his innocent eyes find yours.
“What are you saying?”
You swallow your own urge to cry, taking a cautious step towards him, “I’m saying that I couldn’t call you to tell you I wasn’t in love with you…”
He sniffles, his gaze intensifying as he returns your step, “Why?”
A deep breath is interrupted by roaring thunder behind you, reminding the both of you that this wasn’t really a good time to be doing this.
But you didn’t care.
The whole world could be ending right now, and you would still prioritize this moment.
“Because I would be lying…”
Mother Nature makes herself known once again but the only thing you can focus on is Jungkook rushing towards you. He is soaked as he clashes into you, his arms winding around your waist before pulling you against him. And without a single word, he is pressing his lips onto yours.
He kisses you like he’s done it a million times before. His mouth tucking into yours and eagerly claiming every single bit of his interior. You can feel his hands tightening on the back of your dress, and you respond in kind by smoothing your hands up the soaked material clinging to his back.
Your nose rubs the bridge of his, your desire for him rising way too quickly to grasp. Your fingers leave his back and slide up towards the nape of his neck before smooth over the soaked blueberry strands. Avoiding the ponytail in his hair, you allow them to find is hairline and push it hair back against his head. He groans into your lips at the sensation, the sound going straight between your legs.
“I’m a fucking idiot…” He grunts into your mouth, his hands dangerously close to your ass.
His comment makes you giggle as your eyes flutter open, your hand coming up to cup his cheek, “You and me both…”
Jungkook pecks your lips once more, blinking away the raindrops that find their way into his eyes. He pulls back to get a good look at the face he has loved for so long before a brilliant smile breaks out onto his mouth, “Wait but-“ He lets out a bout of boyish laughter, placing his hand on your opposite cheek, “-you’re serious? You love me?”
You giggle along with him, completely ignoring the very angry storm shouting above your head, “So much it’s cringe-worthy…”
Jungkook chuckles again, resting his forehead against yours, “Me too, for so long.”
“For so long…” You agree, almost exasperated at the amount of relief you feel, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, I was just so worried you weren’t going to feel the same, and I didn’t want to lose you. But after I realized how awful Chase was to me, I kind of figured out that I only dated him to keep my mind off of you.”
Jungkook smirks at you, thumbing over the apple of your cheek, “How did that work out for you?”
You grumble before sticking your tongue out at him, “Terribly, thank you for asking!”
You aren’t yelling exactly, but the clouds have gotten dangerously close, and you have no choice but to speak over the sound of the storm now.
“If you’re going to stick your tongue out at me, you could at least do me a favor and put it in my mouth…” His smirk only broadens, a flash of wickedness in his eyes. To add insult to injury, he parts his lips for you with a raise of his brows. “We have a lot of lost time to make up for.”
He looks like his typical arrogant self but there is something completely new in the words he spoke to you. It gave you whiplash how he seemed to jump from one emotion to the next so quickly, but you can’t say you blame him.
This has been a long time coming…
You’re leaning in towards his awaiting mouth when a voice loud enough to rival the summer storm itself interrupts you.
“Jeon Jungkook! What in the hell do you think you’re doing?! Did I not say to have my granddaughter in before this storm started!?”
Jungkook flinches at the sound of her voice, despite the rather childish giggle coming from his lips.
“Technically, you told me to have her inside before the lightening, Miss Y/L/N!” He retorts and she simply crosses her arms over her chest, her night gown blowing hastily in the wind.
“Am I detecting backtalk Mr. Jeon?! Don’t you make me call your mother; I still have her number on speed dial!”
The two of you giggle like a couple of brats, leaning into one another for a moment before he takes your hand and leads you towards the front door.
Your grandma’s eyes widen once again as she gestures wildly towards the blueberry patch, “Now I know the two of you did not forget the one thing I sent you out here- where the hell are my blueberries?!”
After sort of explaining to your grandmother what happened, she sent the two of you off to separate bathrooms to wash up saying “I can forgive a distraction, I cannot forgive you two dripping all over my brand new carpet…”
Whilst your grandma had been quite excited that you had finally worked things out with Jungkook, she made it very clear that,
“The two of you better be in separate beds when I wake up tomorrow morning. There will be no hanky panky under my roof…”
But the thunder is so loud…
It shakes the flimsy structure of your grandmother’s farmhouse and leaves you to stir uncomfortably in your old bed. Despite living where you do, you’ve never been able to acclimate to storms like these. They have always freaked you out and made you feel unsafe.
Huddled under two of your grandmother’s quilts, you curse yourself for deciding to do things this way. If you had just invited Jungkook back to your apartment, you could be cuddled up to him right now…
Amongst other things…
To be fair, you hadn’t necessarily planned to tell him EVERYTHING today but you just couldn’t help yourself.
You had been waiting so long to finally summon the courage to breach that barrier.
And now that you have, all you want to do is be with him.
Growing up in your grandmother’s house, you have perfected the art of sneaking around the property. There were many nights that you would sneak out to her living room to catch whatever one of your favorite shows was still on. There were many nights that she caught you too, but she never scolded you.
She only ever walked you backed to bed with the reassurance that you needed your rest.
You don’t think she would be as understanding if she caught you this time…
At least you had the advantage of being an adult, and do not have to worry about her taking away your Gameboy as punishment.
The creaking of the floorboards is an unwelcome sound, but the storm is much louder and drowns out anything too incriminating. Jungkook was staying at the guest room all the way at the end of the hall so there is significant distance between his room and your grandma’s room.
Not that this should matter or anything…
When you get to his door, you are regretting not packing something warmer to wear tonight. You were in nothing but your old university sweatshirt and some shorts, seemingly forgetting that summer was most definitely over.
Lingering in front of his door, you are met with a dilemma: to knock or not to knock.
Your fingers are curled into a fist and poised to rap gently against the old pine, but something tells you to just slowly creak the door open instead.
The only light that illuminates the scene before you is the sickly shade of blue coming in from the window pane and Jungkook’s cell phone. He’s holding it in one hand which rests on his bare chest, a small grin lit up by the glow of his screen.
“Took you long enough…”
He looks away from his phone now to catch a glimpse of you but the light it emits allows you to see that is wearing nothing but a pair of gray sweat pants. Vaguely, you make out how much his tattoo sleeve has been developed since you last saw him, and the sight paired with his recently acquired muscles makes your mouth water.
“Hey, you could have come to my room too…or texted me…” You pout, making sure you keep your voice at a reasonable volume.
Jungkook turns his screen towards you to show that he was, in fact, in the middle of texting you.
“I was trying to wait until she fell asleep…” He counters, clicking the side button on his phone. When the screen goes dark, you try not to scowl as the visibility of his beautiful face lessens.
“Well-“ The loud crack of thunder interrupts you, your whole body jolting violently at the sound.
This causes Jungkook to double over in a quiet fit of laughter, his nose scrunching up with amusement.
“It’s not funny…” You quietly whine which only makes him laugh harder. But in the midst of his fit, he reaches out for you, wiggling his fingers.
“C’mere, scaredy cat-“ He is entirely lit up with amusement when you pretend to refuse his request, your eyes narrowing in distaste.
“No, you’re mean…” You grumble despite the fact that you are literally dying to get in bed with him, “I’ll be fi-INE!”
You clamp your hand over your mouth as another round of thunder shakes the house, your eyes wide with fear.
Jungkook has his hand over his mouth too, but its to stop the laughter from escaping his lips. He flops back onto the pillows while you rush over to the bed and climb over him to secure a spot against the wall.
Like a couple of dorks, you two thrash until Jungkook is able to pull the quilt up over you. In theory, this does nothing to shield you from your grandma’s wrath, should she come in here to investigate but it makes you feel safer.
Jungkook is still snickering quietly as you both snuggle up to one another.
“You were saying?” He quips, his skin emitting the woodsy scent of his body wash. You try not to drink it in too much, it’s way too early to be drunk off of him.
“I was saying that you have no sympathy for your best friend and her phobia of loud noises and that I hate you.”
He pretends to be wounded, “Oooh ouch, fair enough. Although you hating me does kind of fuck with my plans for the evening…”
You raise your brows at him, “What plans were those?”
He just grins, one of his hands finding its way to the curve of your waist. Your skin comes alive beneath his touch as you curse the thick material of your hoodie for being in the way.
“Well, if you hate me, it doesn’t really matter now does it?”
With each word, he leans in closer and closer to you, the mint of his toothpaste lingering in the air between your lips.
You’re aptly prepared with a witty comeback but the thunder shakes the walls again, causing you to shrink against his sturdy chest. His laughter causes his body to quake beneath you, but he uses his big strong arms to envelop you anyway.
“Don’t laugh at meeee…” You gripe into his neck, resisting the urge to take a bite out of him, “…you know how much I hate it.”
Jungkook’s smile broadens as he is finally able to hold you like he’s been wanting to, his heart going wobbly in his chest as he feels how close your lips are to his neck.
“Okay, Okay…” He hushes you playfully, kissing the top of your head, “I’m sorry. You’re ok, yeah? Nothing bad is going to happen.”
He softens his tone a bit, one of his hands cautiously moving up and down your back. The more he touches you, the more you are distracted from the chaos brewing just outside your window.
“I really should have moved out of this town by now…” You whisper jokingly, ensuring that your lips brush against his skin as you.
Jungkook takes a deep breath through his nose, his hand stalling a bit at the feeling before he pushes through his desire.
“You’re not allowed to move anywhere.” He says quite plainly, hugging you closer, “Especially not now…”
You hum lightly as he starts massaging the space between your shoulder blades, “Why is that?”
Jungkook bites his lip as he feels your mouth move again, slightly annoyed with himself that he is this turned on already, “Because you have to do the whole small-town thing now. You know- marry your childhood sweetheart, settle down, have a bunch of babies…the ladies at the library will finally stop judging you.”
Giggling quietly, you crane your neck a bit so you can get a glimpse of his face, “Is that what you want?”
He bites his lip, a rather sly but soft look in his eyes, “I want you-“ He replies, playfully coaxing your lips back towards his neck, “-that’s all I’ve figured out so far.”
You smirk when he does, and since he is decidedly telling you where he wants your mouth, you ensure to press your lips against the warmth of his throat. Before you respond, you place a few kisses up the column of it, grinning to yourself as his hands seem to tighten in the center of your back.
“You want me?” You tease, dragging your lips over his skin again, trying not to jump his bones when he shudders beneath you.
“I just said I did, didn’t I?” He is snarky now because it’s the last defense he has before he gives himself over to his lust for you.
“What is it that you want from me?”
The whisper leaving your mouth provides him with another reason to shudder, your gentle response dancing over his skin.
His mouth twitches under the weight of an incoming grin, still in disbelief that he finally gets to be with you this way.
“Honestly?” He murmurs as his fingers become braver. They slide under the bottom of your hoodie, pressing into the skin just above your ass. “I want you to mark my neck up…”
His candid request makes the two of you laugh quietly just beneath the sound of the storm. It was so strange how the two of you seemed to slip into these roles so quickly, all of the first hook-up jitters were cancelled out by the ease you felt around one another.
With another kiss to his throat you whisper, “How do you plan on facing my grandma at breakfast with a hickie on your neck?”
His laughter is slow and warm now, his hands sliding over the swell of your ass, “I have a turtleneck…”
The sound of him chuckling somewhat darkly in your ear fuels something buried deep inside of you; he sounds so sexy and so mischievous at the same time, you could get used to him talking to you like this.
“What if I…” You pause to drag your lips down the side of his neck before pausing at spot just below his collarbone, “…did it here instead?”
Jungkook pouts in the dark, coaxing your lips back up to the juncture between his neck and the start of his shoulder, “It feels better up here…please? I promise I won’t let her see.”
His bout of pleading with you goes right between your legs, and you’re now dealing with the reality that it’s nearly impossible to refuse him when he sounds like this.
“Here?” You whisper, brushing your lips over the spot and playfully dragging your teeth over his skin.
“Mhm…” He hums, leaning his head back for you.
Taking his skin into your mouth, you suck at the sensitive spot he ushered you to until you feel his hands tighten on your body. The sound of his breath catching in your ear prompts you to immediately fulfill his next request, 
“Harder...” He whispers, as his neck elongates slightly, inviting you to continue.  
You’re practically on top of him now, one of your legs wrapping around his waist while you lean into the lovebite even more.  
“Fuck.” Jungkook grunts when you press against the tent forming in his sweatpants, his hands moving from your ass to your hips, “Come up here, get on me.” 
You’re no longer concerned about your grandma waking in on you as you straddle the increasingly needy man beneath you.  
The lightening strike outside of the window lights up the room momentarily, allowing you to see the angry purple mark you left behind. Jungkook’s face is lit up too, and all you can see is the darkness in his eyes and the satisfied grin on his mouth.  
“Hi.” He mumbles against your lips, “You’ve got quite the mouth on you, you know that? My head is already spinning...” 
His praise makes your heart sing as you press a kiss to his lips, a giggle escaping your mouth as the two of you bump noses.  
You indulge eachother for a moment before Jungkook is speaking again, his arousal acting like a truth serum. 
“I’m so hard right now, and we’ve barely done anything.” He murmurs, kissing your bottom lip. 
Resting your elbows on either side of his side, you shiver when he presses his hips against yours. 
“I didn’t realize my lips could have such an effect on you...” You tease, nuzzling his nose and meeting his hips half way.  
The two of you hold back the noises you want to make as the pleasure throbs between your legs. 
“It’s not just your lips...” He argues, eyes widening when you grind against him, “Fuck- you can’t do that to me...” His fingertips press into your hips desperately, his sanity slowly slipping away from him. 
“I’m sorry- “ You bite your lip, nudging his nose again, “I’ve just never felt like this before, I just want to...” 
Jungkook’s hips are grinding up again, his lips cutting you off mid-sentence, “Like what? Horny?” 
His voice is so deep now that it seems to vibrate between the two of you, and with his blue hair splaying out on the pillowcase and his swollen mouth curved up into a grin, you really have no choice but to kiss him again.  
You can feel him smile into it, his hands curving over your ass and flexing his hips upwards again. 
“More than that.” You whisper shakily, finally reconciling with how wet you are now, the material of your shorts sticking to your center, “It’s so much more...” 
Your response softens him all over again, his fingers now sliding beneath hem of your shorts and brushing against the skin below your ass. 
“What do you want to do hm? Do you want to do this?” He nearly coos, kissing your top lip. 
“I do but-” You hesitate, glancing towards the door once more, “I don’t want her to hear us...I thought telling you here would be cute, but now I wish I would have just invited you to my apartment.” 
Jungkook chuckles, the sound slightly unstable under the weight of his arousal, “The hopeless romantic in me is so happy you told me here but-” He lets out a sigh along with another breathless laugh, “-I’m really struggling right now...” 
His honesty makes you whisper a laugh into his lips before kissing him for the millionth time, “Jungkook-” You whine, “I’m sorry...this was the messiest thing I have ever done, and I wanted it to be like this perfect, dramatic thing but it ended up being really impractical and-” 
He cuts you off with another kiss, snickering as he does and using his strength to sit up with you, before laying you back towards the foot of the bed. Still kissing you, he slots himself between your legs while his tongue finds solace against yours. 
“Do I look disappointed to you?” He croons before pushing his length against your aching cunt, “Do I feel disappointed to you? Hm?” 
You shake your head, still kissing at his lips as your nails trail over the skin of his back, “N-No, you don’t, I’m just-” 
“You’re just what?” He nearly taunts, raising his brows as he pulls back a bit, his hands traveling to the bottom of your hoodie, “Mine? Why would I be disappointed with that?” 
He slides the material up your body, groaning as he takes in the sight of your breasts, “Jesus fucking christ-” He leans down, licking a stripe between them before mouthing towards your nipple, “-you’re unreal.” 
“Jungkook...” You whisper now, your back arching, your body yearning for his mouth on you. 
His eyes flutter shut as he takes your nipple in his mouth, his tattooed hand coming up to grip your other breast, squeezing the flesh gently. 
“I want you so bad.” You breathe. 
“Yeah?” He practically purrs, opening his eyes and allowing the lightening to illuminate you now, “Where do you want me, sweetheart?” 
Jungkook licks over your nipple once more before kissing his way to the other one, his breath quickening every so slightly as he anticipates your response. 
He smirks at this, taking a bite of the curvature of your breast before chuckling, “Everywhere huh? Is that what my girl wants?” 
You’re nodding and before you know it you’re threading your fingers in his hair and coaxing his lips back to you, “Please-” Your breathless and slightly inebriated with all of the arousal present in your head but you know one thing for sure, “I want you so bad.” 
Jungkook’s cockiness dissipates at the sound of your pleading, “You’re going to kill me-” He breathes, pecking your lips, “-you want me inside of you?” 
You’re nodding halfway through the end of his sentence, your legs spreading wider, inviting him in. 
“Yes please.” You basically whine, a bout of laughter catching onto the end of it. You’re a little amazed at how desperate you are as you never felt this way with your ex. But Jungkook is the love of your life, and he has been for so long. The need for him to fill you up supersedes all logical thinking. 
He’s laughing quietly too but he looks nervous now, his shaky gaze glancing down where the two of you would be connected, “You have no idea how badly I want this, how long I’ve thought about this moment...” 
You cup his cheek, urging his gaze back to your own, “I do though-” You kiss him again, “-I really do.” 
He sighs shakily, “I don’t want her to catch us, if you feel like it’s too much, you gotta tell me ok? I’ll slow down...” 
“I will, I promise I’ll be quiet...” 
Jungkook groans and shakes his head, “That is the last thing I want to hear...” He frowns before the two of you giggle. He kisses the tip of your nose as he uses his free hand to push the band of his sweats of his aching cock. Your mouth waters as it springs free, cursing your current location from preventing you from indulging in him the way you want to. 
Seconds later, he is on his knees with his dick in his hand, whilst his other slowly pushes your shorts to the side. His nostrils flare as he zeros in on your pussy, his eyes fixating on the sight, “Fuck me...” 
You bite your lip, loving the reactions you illicit from him; you don’t think you have ever felt so sexy in your entire life. 
He looks up at you once again, all sorts of emotions swimming in his gaze, “Are you ready baby?” 
The nod is all he needs to push inside of you and before you know it, the two of you are grinding somewhat helplessly towards your end.  
Chest to chest, you fuck one another, the pleasure completely wrecking any chance you had at lasting very long.  
Throughout it all, there is a cacophony of lust-filled sentiments: 
“Fuck, Y/N...”  
“God I was made for this pussy wasn’t I? I fit so good, don’t I baby?” 
“You’re so fucking sweet, squeezing me so good...” 
“Let me take care of you, I’ll make you feel good whenever you want, make you cum whenever you want...” 
It’s so much and not enough all at once. Two sweaty bodies, so overcome with the feelings they have for one another, feeling the euphoria of finally becoming one... 
The way it was always meant to be. 
“I love you, Jungkook...” 
The storm has nothing on the weather in this room.  
No amount of thunder and lightening could ever surpass the energy between you. 
“I love you, Y/N” 
It was always him, wasn’t it? 
740 notes · View notes
onlyswan · 2 months ago
meet me behind the mall | jjk
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→ pairing: jungkook x f!reader
→ genre: smut sigh, fluff kinda
→ warnings: exhibitionism, public sex, dirty talk, slight ? degredation, calls her a slut once, fingering, handjob, oral (m. and f. receiving), choking, spitting, cum eating / swallowing, unprotected sex, facial (this term is so 😭) lmk if i miss anything plz
→ word count: 3.3k
summary: jungkook makes you live for the thrill of it all.
note: this was an impulsive write idk what possessed me today frends but have at it >_> semi proofread it’s 5am goodbyr
it’s one of the things you first learned about him. jungkook loves taking photos. he loves capturing moments with a simple click of a camera. he finds an unexplainable comfort and bittersweet nostalgia in finding old photographs in his drawer, in his pockets, tucked in between the pages of his textbooks. it’s like finding little treasures all over the place, you can hear his voice in your head, can see the pretty twinkles of passion and fondness in his pretty doe eyes.
so when he told you all about the new photobooth at the arcade, followed by a text that simply said meet me behind the mall, you didn’t particularly imagine that you would end up in this position. you can see the shutter going off even though your eyelids are closed as jungkook’s tongue is basically shoved down your throat. your panties is pulled to the side and two of his fingers are thrusting in and out of your cunt, curling deliciously to stimulate your sweet spot that has your thighs shaking uncontrollably every fucking time.
how naive of you to think that your boyfriend spontaneously texted you at eight in the evening to meet up and simply take cute couple pictures in film. of course, you do have a fair share of scandalous photos, but they’re all conveniently stored and locked away in your phones. this is something entirely new and as embarrassing it is to admit, thrilling. yourself from one year ago never would’ve guessed what her future self is doing right now. how the desires in you can easily be fueled to life just by the trailing of jungkook’s fingers on the smoothness of your thighs, his lips nipping at your neck, or even the simple thought of having his cock filling you up to the brim.
you can’t help but to giggle against his mouth. all of your senses are heightened at this moment, your heart beating aggressively in your chest. he pulls away slightly but his gaze stays on your pink and swollen parted lips, drunk eyes taking in your disheveled state.
“what’s going in that pretty little mind of yours?” he smirks, thumb sneakily rubbing your clit. you try your best to hold out your moan but a broken whine comes out, your head throwing back against the wall of the limited space you’re both squeezed into. only a black curtain and an ‘occupied’ sign in red bold and capital letters separated you from the world outside, where games are being played by people of all ages; loud sound effects and songs from the 2000’s and 2010’s mixing into an ear numbing noise that can only be recognized from an arcade center; and tickets gathered are being exchanged for cute stationary items and trinkets.
“you’re so, so dirty.” you say to him, eyes rolling back as his fingers never let up on their toe curling pace, only making you lose your inhibitions and self-control more than anything else. you clench around them involuntarily, drenching his hand with your juices. “was this your plan all along?”
your eyes widen in shock when the sound of his palm slapping your bare cunt filled the booth, the stinging pain registering in your mind next. “are you fucking crazy? someone might hear!” you whisper angrily at him, but his dark and blown out eyes made you shrink back in your seat. his intimidating, and almost condescending, expression have you gushing against his hand that is now petting your pussy to soothe the pain he inflicted.
“watch your mouth. you and this fucking skimpy dress are the only ones dirty here. you know what this shit does to me.” he smiles at you sweetly. “are you sure this was my plan? are we playing mind games here, baby girl?” his hand comes down from your face to play with the cloth of your blue dress, the other thrusting two of his fingers in you again, then adding another. the stretch has you gripping tightly on his shirt, not having anything else to hold on to.
“fuck, ahhh- jungkook. don’t stop.” god, you are dripping all over, your wetness staining your seat. it makes your cheeks flush in shame.
“just wanted to look pretty for you, i-is all.” you mewl at him, blinking innocently. the camera is not forgotten by jungkook. in fact, it’s one of the things getting him more riled up. the almost blinding light of the flash shines on your soft skin, and the sweat that has formed on your temples and your neck. your pupils are blown and eyelids drooping caused by the pleasure he is giving you. it’s visible how difficult it is for you to keep in all your noises from the people outside the damn curtain when you’re so lost in the feeling of his fingers inside of you. all because of him. your fucked out state got jungkook gritting his teeth, his dick twitching inside his pants. jesus christ, you get him so fucking turned on and desperate for it without even trying. your beauty is seductive and enchanting and effortless. there is no point in hiding how crazy he is for you.
“my pretty girl. you dressed yourself all nice for me?” he presses a chaste kiss on your lips, before he wraps his hand around your throat, pressing at the right places just enough to make your mind all fuzzy. “i’m such a lucky man. i love you so much.”
your eyes roll back at the back of your head at the all consuming feeling taking over senses. you don’t think you can answer correctly if ever someone asks for your name or the colors of the goddamn traffic signs. “y-yeah, for you, of course. love you so much.”
he gives you a satisfied hum, moving down to squeeze one of your breasts with his large hand before pinching your nipple from outside the cotton of your dress. “mhmm, holy fuck. you’re always so sensitive. so easy to please. am i making you feel good?” you don’t know how he can act so casual while you’re basically falling apart in his hands, but for some sick reason, it stirs up the arousal in your belly even more.
“y-yes, kook, i’m so close, please, please, please,” you cry out desperately, tears forming at the corner of your eyes as you squeeze his fingers with your walls uncontrollably. “wait, ohhh, stop. stop. i can’t cum here. i- it’s gonna be a mess, this is so embar- fuck, jungkook!” your squeal dies down in your throat when your boyfriend kneels on the ground and starts sucking your clit in his mouth as his fingers inside of you became more aggressive, hitting all the right places that makes you see stars behind your eyelids. you cover your mouth with your hand to muffle your desperate and whiny sounds, suddenly becoming aware of where the two of you are right now.
you grip his hair with your hands to steady yourself and unconsciously grind your cunt against his face, his eager tongue doing very sinful things for the sole purpose of making you come undone. he pulls you closer to the edge with his strong arm so he can have better access, eating you out like a man feasting on the divine food of the gods. divine. that’s one perfect word to describe you.
he flicks your clit teasingly before wrapping his pink and plump lips around it again. the overwhelming sight almost makes you want to burst into tears. “hmm, cum for me, baby.” your body jerks in his hold, his words of permission acting as the trigger for your orgasm. he drinks you up greedily, his tongue replacing his fingers’ place in fucking into you, letting you ride out your high.
he comes up to kiss you, making you taste yourself in his mouth. you can even feel his wet chin. you moan against him when two fingers dip inside you again, and then he’s having you suck on them almost too enthusiastically. you’re still in a daze from your release, and with jungkook, you’re basically down for anything and everything. you open your eyes to meet his, and if you aren’t already fucked out with his fingers choking you, his hooded eyes will have reduced you into a blabbering mess.
“you’re always so good to me.” he says with a raspy voice. he takes out his fingers and wipes it on his shirt before pulling you in for another kiss. “let’s get out of here so i can fuck you properly like my girl deserves, okay?” you nod meekly, trying to hide your excitement. he fixes you up to make you look presentable enough to walk in public, combing your hair with his fingers and straightening out your dress.
“can’t forget these. don’t want anyone else seeing you like this. it’s for my eyes only.” he gathers all the developed films from the booth, facing you with a teasing smile.
“for your eyes only.” you agree, looking up at him. you open the small backpack you brought along with you and he stuffs them all inside mindlessly, his cock still straining painfully in his pants and he might just lose his mind if he’s still not inside of your pussy in the next five minutes.
“can’t walk properly,” you whine out once you step out of the booth, your boyfriend supporting you by the waist.
“sorry, baby.” he presses an apologetic kiss on your temple. “but i’m not done with you yet.” he really doesn’t give a fuck if anyone heard the both of you at all, but he knows that you’re starting to worry, so he makes sure that you keep your eyes on him as you walk your way out of the place.
“are we going to your place? or mine?” you ask once you get out, the cool air of the mall embracing you. you shiver lightly. your boyfriend doesn’t respond, but when he starts dragging you towards the movie theater that is just beside the arcade, you realize the answer to your question.
“jungkook, really?” you hiss at him, but don’t make any efforts to stop him as he leads you to the restrooms.
“i’m so fucking hard right now, babe. i can’t wait anymore.” they’re about to close up in an hour, so the place is basically deserted. but still, you can’t believe what you’re about to do right now. he peeks in the women’s and once he made sure it’s clear, you go in to the farthest cubicle.
“damn woman,” his throaty chuckle makes your center throb again as you immediately pull down his sweatpants along with his boxers, his big cock slapping against his stomach. you lick a stripe from his balls up to his tip, then gathering saliva in your mouth and letting it drip down his length. his breathing gets heavier at the sight of doing such a filthy action without him asking you to. he strokes your cheek as you jack him off and give his head kitten licks, your spit acting as an effective lube.
“put it in your mouth now, baby.” he says softly, grasping your hair to guide your mouth on his cock. “choke on it, yeah?” you hum in submission to his request, relaxing your throat to take in as much of him as you can. you start to bob your head up and down to get used to the feeling, your hand still wrapped around the few inches left.
“fuck, you look so pretty like this. i’ve been thinking about it all day.” his confession made you all warm inside. you’ve always wondered how you managed to become his girlfriend. sometimes, it feels to good to be true. knowing the effect you have on him even when you’re not around made you even more determined to blow his damn mind. to be the only star of his wildest dreams.
you go down on him until your nose reach his pubic area, carefully breathing out through it. “oh my god, that’s my girl.” he thrusts his hip forward and holds your head down in place, making you choke on him like he wanted to. his moans sends tingles to your pussy and you rub your thighs together in a pitiful attempt to relieve yourself of some pressure. he lets you breathe in some air before you take him in your mouth again, swallowing around his length as you move your head up and down.
“ohhh, fuck. your mouth is s-so warm. you like this huh? sucking me off outside our rooms for the first time?” he can’t help but to move his hips as well, instinctively following your mouth. your moans vibrate on his dick, and he hisses at the added sensation. “and you called me what? so, so dirty? turns out you’re just as fucking filthy, baby.” and there it is again, the mischievous smile on his face that makes your knees (that you’re sure will be bruising soon enough) weak. you know that he’s right. you can’t help but to whimper around him when you feel wetness drip from your hole. you want to touch yourself so bad but your hands on your boyfriend’s flexing muscular thighs are what’s keeping you steady and grounded.
“ohh- ah, fuck fuck fuck! are you fucking kidding me?” his body jerks when you take all of him and stay still, contracting your throat around him and massaging his balls in your small and soft hand. his brain goes on a frenzy at the waves of pleasure rippling in his body, sweat rolling down his temples and abdomen working hard to stop himself from cumming down your throat. “s-shit, stop it, stop it, stop, i’m gonna blow my load.”
you pull him out with a pop, hand gripping his base to keep his orgasm at bay. his glassy eyes meet your own, and you give him a wink. “are you gonna fuck me now?”
a shiver runs up jungkook’s spine. “you’re so fucking hot. come here.” he helps you get up and snakes his tongue in your mouth, pinning you on the other side of the cubicle. his hand sneaks in under your dress to cup your center, groaning against your mouth when he felt how wet you are. “shit, you’re soaking. did you get this turned on by sucking my dick?”
“really turned on. i love blowing you.” you twirl a strand of his hair around your finger, blinking up at him with a smile.
“you’re actually killing me here.” he chuckles, squeezing your ass and pulling you close to grind himself on you. he drags down your panties until you step out of them, throwing it on top of your backpack. he tucks your hair behind your ear and whispers. “jump.” you obey, wrapping your legs around his waist.
he pumps his cock a few times before teasingly running the tip along your wet folds, a nudge on your clif making you moan quietly. “put it in, please. jungkook? i’ve been good, right?”
“shhh, i got you.”
you hold on to his neck tightly as you let yourself succumb to the pleasure. it’s amazing how you can feel so stretched out from the very beginning, only his tip yet breaching your walls. you never really got used to it. “you’re so big, kook.” you cry out against his shoulder as he sinks his entire length into you. your praise inflates his ego. he lets you adjust for a moment, peppering kisses along your neck and shoulder.
when you gave him the signal, he begins thrusting into you, gradually picking up to a rough and unforgiving pace he knows you like. the lewd squelching sounds of your connected sex filled the empty room.
“sh-should’ve done this sooner. ahh fuck, why does this feel so good?” you’re out of your mind. you can’t remember a time you felt this horny. and to be brutally honest, he’s fucking you dumb right now. you can feel every ridge of his cock in you, can feel his tip furiously and consistently stimulating the spot in you that has you writhing in his arms, that along with his pelvis grinding against your clit each time he fucks back into you.
“jesus, are you hearing yourself right now? you like doing it outside with me, baby?”
“yes, yes! oh, harder, please. m-more, i’m close again.” you sob out, biting on his shoulder to cover your cries.
“can’t believe i got myself a filthy little slut here.” he shakes his head in mock disbelief, adjusting his hold on you and fucking you with a much fiercer drive to make you cream on his cock this time. “f-fuck, you’re squeezing me so tight.” he breathes out a laugh followed by a broken moan, your soft walls enveloping him in your wamth. “cum when you need to, hmm? you’ve been so good to me.”
you mutter countless thank you’s mixed with your moans and whimpers, the pleasure getting too much to bear. you throw your head back as you orgasm on your boyfriend’s cock, clenching around him uncontrollably as he fucks you through it, desperate to reach his own high. your juices drip down to his balls, and it makes him crazier. he takes the opportunity create marks on your neck, sucking and biting red and purple on your skin.
it’s not long before overstimulation takes place, but you don’t complain, not when it feels this good. another orgasm hits you, not as intense as the first two, but it still got you seeing stars and your body shaking against the wall.
“did you just cum again? oh god, fucking shit. i’m there- so fucking close. you feel so- oh, so good. love you. love you a lot.”
“i want to swallow your cum.” your voice is barely there, but jungkook hears you just fine. he almost chokes on his own spit upon registering your words in his brain. without wasting any time, he sets you down on the floor and you kneel infront of him, mouth open and tongue out.
he jacks himself off while you generously lick at his frenulum, looking up at him expectantly. the sight of you all eager and impatient for his cum finally triggers his release, aiming for your tongue but some still landing on your cheeks and chin as he’s too overwhelmed and shaken to see straight. you swallow happily, licking the rest from your fingers.
“god, i love you.” he says quietly, pulling you up from the floor and embracing you, but you wiggle out of his grasp.
“love you too but gross, gross, gross. i need to go home and shower.” you whine out, twirling as you try and fix your appearance again.
“not you acting like a brat once you got what you wanted.” he pinches your waist jokingly. he takes tissue from the dispenser to clean up the wetness that dripped down all the way to your thighs, being the loving boyfriend that he is.
“i don’t know what you’re talking about.” you pout at him. “i’m so tired and gross. i hate you.”
“are you asking for it again?”
“no, i swear to god. you owe me a bubble bath and a massage.”
“okay, fine. my place then.” he gives up, shaking his head with a laugh at your change of mood. “i love you. can i get a kiss then?”
you tiptoe to reach him, slightly pulling him down by the collar of his shirt to give him a smooch. “i love youuu.”
once you both make yourself presentable (again) to the best of your abilities, you head out of the restroom first. you notice the cashier at the popcorn place eyeing you suspiciously, especially when jungkook comes out to meet you a few minutes later. you hide yourself behind him in shame.
you walk out of the mall with his hand over your shoulder, yours on his waist. you look at him questioningly when he covers your neck with more of your hair. “maybe i made a little too much.” he winces apologetically.
“we are never doing that again.” you sigh, your legs still feeling weak but you will yourself to make it all the way to the parking lot.
“what? you said you liked it!”
“it was during the moment. i was delirious.”
jungkook rolls his eyes. “you’re lying. let’s see, because that’s also what you said the first time we tried choking.”
“jungkook! shut up!”
note: i never know how to finish these runs and hides
501 notes · View notes
scribblemetae · 22 days ago
Thank you, Baby | Masterlist
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Description/Summery: Turns out the boy who's been stalking you for years has decided its about time he shows his face in the form of a picture, and decides its time to talk to you for real, in the form of a phone call.
Pairing: JJK x Reader
Genre: Yandere, Smut.
Warnings: Stalking, smut, dub-con (Slight), Phone sex, masturbation. Voyeurism, Dirty Talk, Begging (Male), Needy!JK, Sub!JK, oral (f receiving), blindfolds (Kinda not but kinda)  a ridiculously needy JK. Big Dick JK (I mean, obviously)  fingering, cheating (If you were to ask Jeongguk) depictions of an extremely unhappy family life for the reader. Using poor baby Jeongguk. Impreg!Kink (Kinda if ya squint) Dom/Sub themes but you’ll have to tell me whos who cos I have no fucking idea. Jeongguk having no idea hes delulu,  minor character death (Implied) like 3 seconds of a hospital,  NOONA KINK. Dirty boy kink, Stockholm syndrome, face sitting (Kinda) teasing, porn, immoral use of the readers likeness, tears, non-con themes, nipple play (F), dry humping, pillow humping, (So Far)
A/N:  Jeongguk has a tattoo on his hand that says 13 12 2012 (If you’re American please read this is 12 13 2012)
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Click here to add yourself to the Master list <3
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Main Story
Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven - Coming Soon
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Drabbles -  Requests [Open]
Check to see if my requests are open and im happy to write the ‘Scenes you wanna see’. I will only write them if I feel that they would fit the couple where they currently are in the story [To avoid future spoilers] 
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Jeongguks POV - Requests [Open]
Check to see if my requests are open and send in anything you wanna see from Jeongguks POV and I might just write a drabble based on it
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Jeongguks Letters - Requests [Open]
Check to see if my requests are open, here I will post individually all the letters that Jeongguk has sent OC in the story [Ill post the chapter it was written in next to it] and any others that I feel like writing, you’re also welcome to ask Jeongguk to write one based on any of your ideas <3
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If you wanna support me simply buy me a Kofi <3 Only if your able to of course
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mintelepathy · a month ago
“will you still be here tomorrow when i wake up?”
idol boyfriend!jungkook x reader/oc
established relationship
word count: +1.0k
genre: fluff
summary: jungkook couldn't spend your birthday with you but later he makes sure to let you know that he will be by your side for a long time.
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getting drunk and eating pizza by yourself in the comfort of your apartment wasn’t exactly how you expected to celebrate your birthday, not that you were complaining though because for the past years you’ve been spending your birthdays the same way, the only difference is that you hoped to spend it with jungkook this time, but you had to cancel the plans you had for today with him because he was really busy so he wouldn’t be able to see you until after midnight, which meant that you were going to spend another birthday all alone.
you are not angry because he isn’t there with you, and you are not sad either because you are going to see him in a few hours after all, something that you really are, is bored, and when you are bored and alone you tend to do some embarrassing things.
that’s why you didn’t think twice when you grabbed the bottle of vodka you have saved in your bedroom for special occasions, now being one of those special occasions, and you don’t forget to grab a mic you have also there for karaoke, and once you got everything you need, you turn the tv on ready to scream at the top of your lungs your favorite songs.
after one bottle of beer you had with the pizza and two shots of vodka, one in between each song you sang, you already start to feel the alcohol effects hitting your system, maybe grabbing that bottle of vodka wasn’t the best decision you made tonight because alcohol just makes you clumsier than you already are, more emotional than you already are, and to finish it makes you feel sleepy, and you don’t want to feel sleepy, not when jungkook could arrive in any second.
you grab the vodka and put it back where you first found it before continuing your concert for your inexistent audience, you are already tipsier than you would like to be so no more drinks for tonight.
you are feeling too much the next song, with your eyes closed and your body swinging from side to side that you don’t notice that someone was contemplating your little show for this past minute.
“amazing” you almost have a heart attack when you hear his voice and his hands clapping.
jungkook was standing against the door’s frame looking at you with a big smile on his face, it seems that you did have an audience.
“you came earlier” you say pouting while making your way towards him to give him a big hug, before cupping his face with your hands and start leaving lots of small kisses across his face.
yeah, alcohol makes you more affectionate a well.
“it’s actually one in the morning” you are still giving him kisses and he giggles when your mouth is close to his neck. you didn't notice how fast time passed “and happy birthday, again. I know you didn’t want to me to get you anything but I just couldn’t come here empty handed” you stop giving him kisses to grab the box he was handing you.
“oh gguk you didn’t have to, thank you” you said as you go for another hug.
“i think you should open it” he says after giving you a soft kiss on your temple.
“give me ten more seconds to enjoy this” you say hugging him tighter “one, two… nine, ten. okay” you sigh and let him go.
inside the little box you find a pen drive and a note that says waiting to keep making memories with you.
you smile and look at him with curiosity in your eyes, you have no idea what that thing can have inside, so you grab your computer and lay with him in your bed, ready to watch what he had made for you.
emotion hits you right after the video starts playing, he had made you a G.C.F just for you, filled with moments you’ve shared together, from your late night drives and night walks on the beach or the park to small but precious moments you’ve shared in his and your apartment.
he is so busy at work, and if not he spends almost all of his free time with you so it means a lot to you that he made time to make this beautiful gift for you.
“jungkook” you turn to face him and you find him looking fondly at you with tears in his eyes as well. “I love you so much” he wraps his arms around your waist as you lay on top of him burying your face in his neck.
“i’m sorry i couldn’t be here for your birthday” he says as he strokes your back.
“don’t be sorry, you are here now, and i entertained myself pretty well while waiting for you" you say referring to your karaoke time.
“oh yeah i could tell” you hear him giggle.
you forgot that he had seen that small concert you were giving moments ago.
“will you still be here tomorrow when i wake up?” you ask as you move away from his neck to look at him, your nose barely touching his.
“i will” he says as he puts a strand of your hair behind your ear. he gently places his hand against your cheek pulling you close enough to meet his lips with yours.
the way he kisses you so softly melts your heart instantly, you will never get tired of this.
“what’s wrong?” he asks when he doesn’t feel your lips against his anymore.
“sorry, i just realized that my breath probably stinks of vodka” you say trying to cover your mouth with your hand but he stops you.
“oh shut up and come here” he gently grabs your neck this time to pull you closer and kisses you again.
after a few more kisses and a little bit of cuddling time you end up falling asleep in his arms, and he just keeps caressing your hair and humming some songs until he falls asleep as well.
maybe he couldn’t be there yesterday, but he was there now, and he would be there tomorrow, and all of the days ahead of you.
days where you were going to keep making memories together.
a like or reblog is always appreciated<3
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venusiangguk · 7 months ago
the art of wanting | jjk (m)
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>>pairing: jungkook x reader / dilf!jk x grocery store clerk!oc
>>genre: strangers to lovers, smut, pwp, a lil bit of plot 
>>word count: 10.3k literally why cant i write anything short ever hhhh
>>warnings: cute baby!!!, jk being a good dad, he likes to garden :(, dom jk, sub oc, age gap, handjob, coming in pants, AYOOO OC GOT A FAT COOCHIE, lowkey body worship, fat coochie supremacy, oral (m/f), safe sex, sexual tension, praise, multiple orgasms, eye contact, jk likes to watch 🥴, asking for permission, jk’s lowkey controlling i guess but it’s soft and like not toxic lol, PLAYFUL use of the word ‘daddy’, no actual daddy kink 🙄, dirty talk
>>notes: idk what it is, but something about actual dads being called ‘daddy’ in a sexy way just does not sit right w me 😐 so i did not include the d word in any sexy context sry daddie luvers, maybe next time !! anyway! late vday one shot!! didn’t turn out as good as i wanted, but i still hope you enjoy! sorry for any mistakes; this is not beta’d lol ALSO ty to @moonb0yy​ for helping me with parts ilysm much bestie ur the best <3
>>summary: you find a baby in your store and in turn, a dilf finds you.
series masterlist, pt 1, pt 2, pt 3
Being a grocery store stocker at the ripe young age of 22 wasn’t exactly where you thought you would be after graduating from university. You thought you’d be in a big city, living it up. The stereotypical vision of a hot, independent, young girl making money, and experiencing success. Turns out you were wrong and that you maybe kinda sorta majored in something you have literally no interest in and now have a degree that you have zero desire to use. So alas, here you are, decked out in your khaki pants and light blue polo. Non-slip shoes truly tying the whole look together. 
 You also didn't think you would have a small, young, baby child gripping said khakis. You look down at the tiny human and then around the empty aisle. No one in sight. You are in the junk food lane of an overpriced, organic whole foods store. The health nuts that shop here don’t usually venture into ‘artificial’ ingredient territory. Baby seems to not be so picky. You glance down at her again. Her big doe eyes blink at you a single time.
 You gingerly shake your leg trying to get her off, kind of like you would to a chihuahua if it was jumping on you or humping your leg. Baby is quite resilient, hands small but very strong. She does have thumbs after all.
 “Can I help you?” You ask her with a quirked brow.
 She babbles for a second before her little chubby arms reach up. She makes grabby hands at you.
 You look at the box of teddy bear cookies in your hand, then back at the child. You slowly extend the box to her. 
 “Nuuu- uw!” She says, swatting the box from your hand to the floor. 
 Her grabby hands are insistent, and now she’s got a little scowl on her face. Might be close to tears? You don’t know, you don’t speak toddler.
 “Listen,” You say, appeasing her and picking her up. “That was not nice, and also, you shouldn’t be talking to strangers. Where’s your mommy, hmm?”
 She’s hoisted on your hip as you bounce her. Her fat little cheeks jiggle. You didn’t usually like kids, but this one was okay you supposed. She’s cute at the very least. She’s wearing the tiniest little skort with a pink shirt that has a taco on it. ‘Taco-bout cute!’ it says. She’s even got baby doc’s on, and you’re a little envious if you’re being honest. Those were expensive. Her pigtails stick straight out the sides of her head, a little lopsided, but endearing. You’re sure her mom did her best. 
 “Daaaaa,” She spouts.
 “Yeah?” You ask. You bounce her a little harder and the sweetest little giggle gurgles from her mouth, her eyes almost disappearing from how big she’s smiling. You spy some little teeth coming in. “You’re a little rude, but I think that’s because you’re spoiled because you’re so cute, huh?” You poke her belly.
 You switch to swaying her, and she coos. Rests her little head on your shoulder, one of her hands coming up to grip at your name tag. 
 “Hey now, don’t fall asleep. I need you to be able to identify your human. I can’t just hand you off to someone random.” You whisper, starting to walk to the customer service area so they can make an announcement over the intercom system.
 As you’re making your way to the front of the store, you see a man turning the corner. A very sexy man. He’s wearing sweats, but somehow still looks clean and put together. He’s got big sneakers on his feet, could pass as dad sneakers if you didn’t know otherwise. Those two tone shoes, your brand savvy mind knows, are Balenciagas. He’s tall and so so fine, but really really frantic. He looks frazzled, and like he’s lost something very important. You look at the baby. She probably counts as something important to most people.
 The man’s eyes fall on you, and then travel to the toddler in your arms. A look of relief falls over his features. He slumps and hangs his head exhaling, before he starts jogging towards you with a dazzling white smile on his face. He’s got dimples.
 And this just won’t do. Nope. You’ve got two hard limits. One of them being anal.
 The other being hot men that are also dads. 
 It’s weird you know. Your friends remind you of it whenever you swoon at seeing daddy-baby duos in public. You don’t even know what it is about it, but it just does something to your womb. Pussy? Same thing essentially. 
 He sighs looking at you like you have the cure to cancer in your arms as he comes face to face with you. 
 “That’s mine.” He says gesturing to the baby. 
 You hum. “Finder’s keeper’s.”
 His face falls and he looks like he’s about to panic again. You laugh.
 “Just kidding. But you do have to prove it. Not just gonna hand a baby to a stranger. I was just on my way to the front.”
 “No! Of course, um. Nari…” He coos, getting closer. The baby doesn’t acknowledge him much, just smiles, like she’s trying to ignore him. She turns closer to your chest and babbles before letting out a happy shriek. The man smiles like he’s in awe of the tiny little human in your arms. 
 “Slight recognition. A good sign. Got any pictures?” You ask, shifting her to your other hip.
 He nods and pulls out his phone. “She’s 18 months, she still only babbles but the doctor said she’s on the right track to talking,” He explains, trying to prove he knows all the baby facts that a dad should while swiping through his camera roll. It’s full of pictures of the baby girl. You see a selfie of him and the baby, she’s got oversized glasses on her face and the man is smiling so wide, mid-laugh. Maybe you’re dramatic but your heart literally shatters in your chest. “Absolutely hates peas, but loves butternut squash?” You glance at the hand basket hanging from his bent arm. There is indeed an assortment of baby mush in jars. “I don’t know, she’s kind of weird. Oh! Her name is Jeon Nari. Right Nari?” He sing-songs, trying to get her attention. 
 She reaches a plump little hand out to him, and he brings his face closer so she can reach better. She taps his cheek before she moves and grabs at his nose. She pulls her hand back with a squeal.
 He gasps. “Nari! Did you take my nose?” He makes an over exaggerated shocked expression. 
 She turns to you and offers you her clenched fist.
 You pull back, “I don’t want it.”
 She giggles, turning back to her dad. 
 “Can I have it back Miss. Nari? Please?”
 Miss. Nari. You’re going to pass away.
 Nari looks like she thinks about it before she all but flings herself from your grip to his arms. They are both laughing, and you feel like you’re third wheeling when you see her place her open mouth on his cheek, giving a kiss in the gross, adorable way that babies do. Not wanting to interrupt, you go back to stocking junk food.
 “Thank you.” He says softly. 
 You turn to look at him, and he’s got the baby on his hip, hand under her little diapered butt. She’s holding his thumb in her hand, resting on his chest. His strong dad chest.
 “No problem. Maybe don’t lose your baby again though.” Or maybe do, so I can find her and find you by association.
 He blushes. “I swear I’m a good dad. It’s just- The baby food is on the very bottom shelf, so I had to put her down to crouch and get it. And I swear. She can’t talk yet, but missy can toddle. Very fast.”
 You look at her for a moment and then just laugh. “She seems like the type to get what she wants, and if she wants to run through the grocery store?” You shrug. “Who are you to stop her? Daddy or not.”
 You swear you don’t mean it in a sexy way. But his blush moving farther down his neck is satisfying.
 He clears his throat. “Uh- Yeah. My fault. She’s a little spoiled.” He rubs his hand over the nape of his neck, bashful. Nari makes a noise of complaint. He gives her his hand back. She kicks gleefully in his hold.
 “Anyway,” You say, “You’re welcome.”
 He offers you a small smile before turning to his daughter. “Say ‘thank you’ baby.” 
 She glances as you and her face lights up. “Ba buuuuu!” 
 You coo. “You are very welcome sweet girl.” You say getting to her level. “Don’t give Daddy too hard of a time, okay?”
 To yours and her dad’s surprise, she leans forward in his hold and places her little hands on your face, leaning into breathe on you with an open mouth in her baby kiss way. Her dad makes a surprised noise.
 “Oop, sorry. She really likes you.” He chuckles leaning away. 
 You stare at him a little wide eyed, baby slobber on your forehead.
 He laughs harder and reaches his arm out. He wipes the spit off with the back of his hand. You both still, seeming to realize you’re having skin to skin contact at the same time. He drops his hand in a jerky manner.
 You both stare at each other, and you don’t miss the way his eyes flicker over your body, like he’s trying to refrain but curiosity or perhaps desire gets the best of him. You don’t know, but you hope it’s because he wants. 
 He looks like he’s gonna say something more, but Nari has other plans. Dinner plans if the way she’s wiggling in his arms towards the basket while gurgling unhappily means anything.
 “Ah, looks like it’s dinner time. Thanks again…” He looks at you expectantly. 
 “___.” You say, pointing to your name tag.
 He smiles and his eyes crinkle. “I’m Jeongguk.” He jumbles Nari a little, she shakes her head and grumbles before burying her face in his neck. He rolls his eyes. “You know her. She’s appreciative, just hungry.”
 “I understand. Have a good night Jeongguk.”
 “See you later, ___.”
 You watch him go, eyes traveling down to his toned back down to his cute butt. He catches you staring when he turns back and gives you a small wave and a smile. You play it cool. Gotta play it cool with cool dads.
 Another day, another can on a shelf. 
 Also, another baby grabbing your khakis.
 Well, not another baby. It’s the same baby. Little Nari. 
 “Why, hello there,” You coo, picking her up. “Where’s daddy? Or mommy?” You say puzzled. “Do you have one of those? Please say no.”
 She stares at you dumbly. She has a single sprout with a bow atop her head today. 
 You look around for her dad and see him peeking around the corner. Like he sent Nari to you and is waiting for her to do something. He sees you looking at him and sighs before he starts walking towards you. He’s in baggy jeans with tears in the thighs, along with an oversized crew neck today. You gulp. Dilf aisle 2.
 “She messed up.” He says on arrival.
 “Huh? No, she could never do anything wrong,” You say shielding her defensively. “Could you, Nari?”
 She rubs her full fist on her belly. “Na na.”
 You both look at her endeared albeit confused before Jeongguk speaks up.
 “You’re right.” He amends. “But she was supposed to give you your gift.” He gestures to one of her full hands.
 She’s fisting a paci in one and a small succulent in the other.
 You eye them before slowly looking at him. “Which one is for me?”
 He gives you a closed lip smile, shoulders shaking as he tries not to laugh.
 Although seeing Jeongguk smile and laugh and turn the prettiest shade of red because of you is satisfying, you give him a break and turn to Nari. “Can I have that?” You ask gently.
 She looks at you, and then at the succulent before promptly turning it upside down.
 “Nari!” Jeongguk gasps. He reaches out and takes it from her before more than just a little dirt falls to the ground.
 You laugh, and Nari squeals at you. She looks at Jeongguk almost as if asking if she did something right. Once again, he’s trying to hold in laughter.
 “Da!” She says pointing at you.
 “Here, let’s switch,” He says, taking the baby human from you and in exchange offering you a baby plant.
 “What’s this for?” You ask. You can’t keep plants alive for shit, but it’s cute and thoughtful.
 “For finding this one last time.” He says rubbing his nose on hers. She blows a raspberry. He makes a disgusted yet adored face. Dads and their babies man.
 “Thanks, sorry in advance if I kill it.”
 “Succulents are pretty low maintenance. Just moderate sunlight and watering like once a week.” He’s got his hip cocked, with Nari settled in the curve of it and you consciously have to avert your eyes from how trim and lithe it looks. 
 “You’d be surprised at how not self-sufficient I am.”
 He hums. 
 “So, she’s two?” You ask, placing the plant on a shelf so you can get back to stocking.
 “She’s 18 months.” He replies. 
 “So basically 2.”
 He makes a contemplative face. “Eh… 18 months.”
 You give him a look. “You’re one of those dads?”
 He’s smiling and makes an affrontive noise. “Hey, she’s only a baby once. I’m not gonna rush her!”
 “Baaa!” Nari agrees.
 “Yeah, tell her baby!” He encourages.
 He’s so sweet and hot and such a good dad. And he has to be successful and well off, you just know it. Groceries here were not cheap. You can feel it in the way your lower heartbeat goes crazy when you see him. You’re basically drooling right in front of him. But you have to keep it cool.
 “And how old is Daddy?”
 Not your coolest. You’ll admit that.
 You don’t even have a daddy kink. You just like his reactions. Mostly.
 Jeongguk cackles, head falling back and Nari looks at him with his copy pasted doe-eyes before she does the same. Her flexible little baby bones allow her to almost bend in half. Jeongguk cradles a big hand under her head and helps her back up, still laughing to himself softly. He adjusts her shirt so her round tummy isn’t exposed. She’s a lady, after all. She’s gotta be decent.
 “I’m 29,” He says once his laughter has subsided some. “And you?” He asks.
 “You wanna know how old I am?”
 He nods on a hum. “I’m curious.”
 “And why would you be curious about my age, hmm?” You tease.
 Jeongguk flushes and rolls his eyes playfully. Giving you a look that says, You know why. 
 You both know why. 
 “Humor me.” He bargains.
 “I’m 22.” You tell him simply.
 “Oh thank god.” He groans under his breath. Still a bit of a gap, he thinks. He still feels a little creepy but at least you're not in your teens still. And also it’s not like this… tension is going to amount to anything more than exactly that, because he will not actively pursue someone who is 7 years younger than him. Even if you are hot and keep calling him the forbidden d word.
 Nari looks at him concerned. “Daaaa?” She offers him her paci. He raises his hand to decline.
 “I’m okay thank you, that’s yours.” He pops it in her mouth and she immediately slumps against him, rubbing her face in his shirt. Must be sleepy. He turns back to you. “Thanks for moving the baby food by the way.”
 You think back to a week or so ago when you were restocking the baby aisle. Maybe you did reorganize a whole entire shelf for a random dilf you talked to once. Not your strongest moment but you justified it by reminding yourself that it genuinely didn’t make sense that the baby food was on the bottom shelf when something less imperative to a baby’s health could be. Like the $67 baby wipe warmer, or the equally pricy turtle bath thermometer. You would like to believe that Jeongguk was perfectly capable of figuring out if the water was right for baby with his hand and common sense.
 You turn a little red, embarrassed. You sniff. “You don’t know that was me.”
 “Ah, well I just have a feeling.” He drones while smiling softly and resting his cheek on the top of Nari’s head, looking at you. That’s when he seems to realize his baby is nodding off. “Hey missy.” He jostles her a little and she looks up blearily, confused and dazed, just having been on the cusp of a dreamland. “Don’t fall asleep, Mommy will be mad if I drop you off fresh from a nap because you,” He boops her nose and she swats at his hand with an unhappy grunt. She is absolutely rotten. “will keep her up all night, and I will have to hear all about it in angry texts.”
 You should mind your business, but you’re nosy and this is actually important information. 
“Mommy?” You pretend to focus on the cans you’re stocking, trying to go for causal and nonchalant.
 He takes a deep breath and the sighs. “Yup. We alternate weeks. Hers starts today. I’m here just restocking baby’s stuff. I like to send her off with extra so mom doesn’t have to worry.”
 Valuable, important information indeed.
 “That’s really nice of you.” You say genuinely.
 He nods, thoughtfully. “The least I could do. It’s already hard enough on this one, jumping around so much when she’s so little.” You can hear a small trace of sadness and guilt in his voice.
 “Hey,” you start, “that set up is a lot better than being in a house with parents that don’t get along. I think you’re a good dad.” You finish feeling a little silly. Like your opinion mattered. You’re 22 trying to console a sexy 29-year-old father.
 He regards you quietly for a moment before he breaks out into a smile. “Wanna know something funny I do whenever I send her off?”
 You nod, already chuckling a little.
 He points to her belly. Nari looks down confused. “I always give her to her Mom in clothes like this.” 
 She’s wearing a teal shirt that says ‘Daddy’s Girl ♡’ in big pink letters. You poke her tummy, and she gives the cutest most infectious baby giggles before lifting her shirt to show you her tummy. You squeeze it a little before she squirms and pulls her shirt back down clutching at her dad and giving him a slobbery, giggly, baby kiss.
 You full on laugh, giving him a round of applause. Funny and petty. “That’s so good.” You pause debating on whether or not to ask what you’re thinking. You do anyway. “Bad break up?”
 “Divorce actually.” He muses, adjusting Nari. “I mean we’re cordial for baby, but I wouldn’t say we are friends.” He thinks for a minute, “Although this is petty,” He gestures to her shirt again, “I mostly just do it because her mom gets annoyed and it’s funny and it makes it so I cry less when I drop her off. It’s not malicious.” He laughs a little to himself.
 Such. A. Good. Dad. Your heart is weeping. Something else is also wet. But it’s not your fault. It’s his. Before you can reply he’s speaking up again.
 “But on that note. I do have to actually shop and get her going. Thanks again for finding her that one day, don’t forget to water that.” He says nodding to the little plant on the shelf.
 “Guess you’ll have to remember to remind me.” You say, smiling slyly.
 “Guess so,” He says with a soft grin. “See you around. Say ‘bye bye’ Nari.”
 “Ba ba!” She says clenching her small hand in a wave of some sort.
 They turn to continue their shopping, and you can’t resist it when you say, “Don’t cry too much Daddy!” 
 Jeongguk’s steps falter before you see his shoulders shake with laughter.
 Without turning around, he says, “You gotta stop calling me that!” You can hear the smile in his voice. 
 He turns the corner, and you go back to stocking, reminding yourself to not forget your baby succulent at the end of your shift.
 You’re not made to work the register often. But when you do? It’s always as awful as the last. Having to deal with people and their coupons, or their questions, or their card declining really just isn’t how you want to spend an 8 hour shift. And you always contemplate quitting. Every single time. 
 Except this time.
 Jeongguk places his items on the belt, and you can’t help but stare.
 He’s got 3 red bull’s, 1 step ladder, some mangoes, and a bottle of plum wine. It’s an interesting assortment, and you have to ask, “Whatcha doin?” as you ring the items up.
 “Hi,” He says with that heart stopping, jaw dropping smile of his. “I’m decorating the second bedroom in my house. Bout time Nari moves out.” 
 You chuckle and nod to yourself. “No baby this week?”
 He shakes his head. “Hence the bottle of wine.”
 “Nice,” you say as you close off your lane. The man behind Jeongguk scowls at you, but you simply smile and wave goodbye, sending him a couple lanes over. You’ve decided it’s time for your break. “Does it have a theme?”
 Jeongguk looks between you and your closed lane as he pockets his card. It’s one of those sleek cards that are thick and heavy. The kind that just feel rich. Like when you see someone use it you just know they are doing well in life. He’s super casual today, workout shorts and a long sleeve shirt on his body. You wish you could see his legs better. He’s worn pants every other time that you’ve seen him. 
 Leaning against your lane he nods. “Yeah, kind of. I like plants and like gardening or whatever. I work a lot and it’s therapeutic and Nari likes playing in the dirt.” He waves his hand dismissively, “Anyway! Little one has to at least like flowers by default. So, I think I want a forest theme? I want to add mushrooms somehow because I found the cutest little mushroom stool at a secondhand store. Also, maybe some faeries.” He nods to himself. “I’ve already got the new furniture and everything. It’s a circular bed that kind of looks like a tree trunk, well not kind of- it actually looks like a tree and then these lamps that hang and look like those droopy flowers that faeries wear as hats? You know, the bell looking ones? Anyway, I also- ”
 You’re smiling really wide when he looks at you. He turns a little red. “Sorry,” he says. “This is probably the last thing you want to hear about at work.”
 You shake your head quickly. “No, no. I was just thinking that of course she’s gotta like plants. Her name does mean ‘lily’.”
 Jeongguk winces, pastes a faux look of guilt on his face. “Ah- That was a little selfish on my part.” He starts to roll up his sleeve. “My birth flower is a lily. I got this for her.” 
 When Jeongguk’s sleeve is properly rolled up, not only do you see a beautifully done tattoo of a lily flower, but you also see a whole entire sleeve covering his fair skin. Your eyes rake up and down his forearm and you have a horrible feeling that the sleeve continues all the way up his arm. He’s even got knuckle tattoos; you have no idea how you didn’t notice before. You blame Nari. 
 You swallow audibly. “That’s so hot.” It comes out sounding like a wheeze.
 “Huh?” Jeongguk says with a surprised laugh.
 You panic. “I said, that’s so… thought. Thoughtful. I think your tattoo is so thoughtful.”
 He laughs for a second longer before humming. “Thank you. But I’ll let you enjoy your break. I have to go get paint and wallpaper still, then I have to get straight to work. I procrastinated so I only have the weekend to get it done before she comes back.”
 You’re biting your lip in thought when he starts to walk away. Something that could be very embarrassing on the tip of your tongue. Are you sure you’re ready for potential rejection dished out by the incredibly hot dilf? What if he stops coming to the store and you can’t even ogle him anymore? Or play with his cute baby? You take a deep breath.
 “Wait! Jeongguk!”
 He stops and looks at you over his shoulder, throwing you a questioning gaze.
 “Do you- want help?”
 The look on his face would be comical and you would laugh at him if you could get a proper breath in around the nervous butterflies fluttering around in your chest cavity. He’s turned himself all the way around to look at you properly and he quite literally is just standing there. In the middle of the exit walkway.
 “You wanna help me decorate my daughter’s room?” He confirms.
 You nod. “Yes. I do. I get off in a couple hours.”
 Jeongguk feels his hands get a little sweaty. Maybe he’s kinda old, and maybe it’s been a while since he’s been in the game, but he’s almost positive that the… pull that’s between you both that’s been nagging at him isn’t innocent, and that if it manifested in his empty house where he is alone with you… it could potentially lead to his complete and utter demise. A little stilted flirting and smothering tension in the dry goods aisle was fine and good every couple weeks or so… but he meant it when he placed those imaginary boundaries between you two. The ones you don’t know about. The ones he put in place to ensure he won’t pursue someone so much younger. That means there’s only one answer to your question.
 “Yeah. I would love your help.”
 The answer being that he’s just going to practice really great self-control. He’s going to be an adult. He’s a dad! He’s like a pro at keeping his cool and being responsible! There’s no way he would break the rules he’s set for himself.
 Everything will be fine.
 Everything was not fine.
 You’re in his house and you’re not in your uniform. You’re in the tiniest pair of black soffe shorts he has ever seen, along with a fitted white v neck that lets the zipper of your sports bra peek out. The sports bra that is working very, very hard. Your tits did not look that big under the work polo, nor did your waist look so small. You reach on your tippy toes to mark off a higher area of the wall with blue masking tape. Your shirt lifts up and a twinkle catches his eye. There’s a jeweled heart dangling from your belly button. How cute. And how fucking awful for his sanity.
 Now Jeongguk’s not stupid. He really isn’t. He was on the Dean’s List in university, has his own company now. He’s smart and he has critical thinking skills. Yet somehow, he didn’t think about how you wouldn’t be showing up in your polo and khakis. Of course, you wouldn’t that would be stupid. Just like Jeongguk apparently. 
 “I think a faerie should go here.” You say pointing up to the marked spot. You smile at him expectantly. He smiles back, although it looks more like a grimace.
 “Don’t forget there’s going to be a tree playhouse in that corner.” He reminds.
 You hum. “Oh, maybe we- or you should put some of the vines you got on the wall? Kind of like ivy?” You bend over to pick up one of the long leaf garlands.
 Jeongguk’s face lights up, temporarily refocused by your idea. He could not be blamed if his eyes wandered when you bent down. He simply could not, any man would have succumbed to such a sight. 
 “That’s a such a good idea, here.” He says reaching for the leaves. “I’ll start tacking them up.”
 You shake your head. “I can do it. Where’s the step stool?”
 And that’s how you find yourself a few feet above him. Rich, successful people and their high ceilings. Jeongguk’s got his hands extended up and out, hovering over your hips, acting as a safety for you just in case you fall. His eyes are obnoxiously respectful, averted and looking away as if the sage green walls are a better sight than your ass in his face. His extended hands give you an idea though.
 What if you just… fall?
 You look at the distance between you and the floor once before committing and kamikazeing off the ladder. You’d like to think that you fall gracefully into his waiting arms. The grunt he lets out, and how hard his back hits the wall behind you tells you otherwise. Good thing the paint is dry.
 “Oof.” He breathes out, hands tight on your waist. His head falls back, and his eyes squeeze shut as he tries to catch his breath. 
 He braced your fall so you’re okay, just content in his arms as he recovers from getting the wind knocked out of him. Your hands are resting on his chest. His body is warm, and he smells good. 
 “Oh my god, are you okay?” He says once he can breathe properly. “You’re not hurt, are you?” His eyes look overly concerned, probably acting as he would if Nari fell. Dad instincts taking over as he lifts your arms to inspect them, bending them to make sure they still work. He looks like he’s about to take a look at your legs, but you stop him.
 “I’m fine, I’m fine!” You giggle. You place your hands on his cheeks and make him look at you. He’s got a surprised look on his face and you can feel how his cheeks heat up under your touch. Seems kind of on edge with you touching him. “Are you okay?” You ask quietly, a smile still lingering. Your hand runs from his cheek to his jaw, down to his neck. Your thumb just grazes his Adam's apple when he swallows and licks his lips. “You’re the one that caught me.” You tilt your head while you look up at him.
 “I…” He starts.
 But he doesn't finish because all he can focus on is the hand that was on his neck, slowly dragging down his shoulder, down his arm, then back up to rest on his bicep. It’s a simple, gentle touch, but the intentions behind your movements are salacious. He knows because the desire in the air has skyrocketed, he’s sure he could touch it if he could even bring himself to lift a hand. 
 “I’m good- I’m okay.” He whispers, frigid in your hold, like he’s scared to move. Like if he does what he should want, but doesn’t, you’ll vanish like one of the faeries on the wall. 
 “Are you sure?” Your tone matches his, and you look at him with wide puppy eyes, brows etched with exaggerated worry. “I know you’re like- really strong,” The hand you have resting on his upper arm squeezes for emphasis. “But maybe I should check? Just to make sure?”
 And fuck, he knows what you’re doing. He sees it written all over your face. The faux concern. The fake way you’re fretting over him. He feels it in the way your body inches closer to him, the heat radiating off of you just on the pleasant side of too hot. Your acrylics scratch at the nape of his neck and he can’t stop the chills that run down his arms.
 “You don’t have to do that I-”
 You’re on your toes, trying to reach his ear. He’s still too tall so you settle on whispering into his neck, “I want to.”
 Jeongguk’s eyes close so tight he starts to see those little white spots burst behind his lids. The whine that escapes from the back of his throat sounds distressed and pained, like he’s fighting with himself. 
 “__…” He says quietly. Just shy of pleading. Or maybe he’s warning. Warning you that you’re about to cross a line neither of you can go back from. It makes you smile.
 “Please,” You beg back. You press your body fully to his, boobs flush against his torso, hips angled against his. “Please tell me I can.” The hand that was at his nape slowly trails down to his torso, down his stomach. His abs tense underneath his long sleeve shirt, and he’s got his head turned away from you, like he’s battling with his cock and his morals.
 You press a soft kiss to his neck, and he shudders, the hands on your hips tighten like he doesn’t know if he wants to push you away or pull you closer. You place a hand on his jaw, then guide him to look at you. He comes easy enough and looks down his nose at you, eyes hooded, and brows furrowed.
 “It’s okay to want this,” You murmur. “It’s okay to want me.”
 His eyes shut, and he lets out a sigh. You feel him just barely press into your palm. “You’re just- I’m so much older than you… I don’t want to take advantage of you.” 
 You laugh a little. “You’re not, I want this. I’ve wanted this.” You press your lips to his neck again and pull a little bit of skin between your teeth before smiling into him. “I’ve thought about it so much… I’m a big girl, I know what I want. Plus, it’s just a little bit of fun.” Your fingertips on his lower belly play with the top of his shorts. “So, can I have it?”
 And Jeongguk can’t say no, not when you sound like that. Not when his cock is already hard and straining against his briefs. Not when your touch makes him crazy, not when it’s the first one he’s felt other than his own in months. 
So, he gives in. He nods and just like that, your hand slips into his shorts over his briefs and it’s good. So mind-numbingly good. The moan that falls from his lips as soon as your palm brushes over the head of his cock over the fabric is lewd and loud and so relieved. His head falls back against the wall, and his eyes flutter shut while you pump him over his Calvin’s, mouth parted slightly. His breaths go up in pitch at the tail end of his sighs, the softest moans filling the air.
 You rub your thighs together as you watch him succumb to pleasure, bottom lip pulled between your teeth. 
 “You sound even hotter than I thought you would.” You say quietly. Your hand travels farther down between his legs to fondle his balls. He gasps softly and spreads his legs wider for you, angling his hips so you can touch him better. You hum and move back up to stroke him. 
 “Feel good?” You ask.
 He laughs lightly and nods. “Yeah… so good.” He swallows. “‘S been awhile.” 
 You grin to yourself and look down. You can’t see much, really just touching in a way you think could be pleasing to him. It seems to be working a little bit at least, because in your palm, Jeongguk is so hard. His cock is thick, and long. It’s pulsing, twitching sometimes when you touch him just right. 
 Almost as if he can read your mind, he settles his big, tattooed hand over your small one, urging you to grip just a touch tighter, speed up just a little more.
 “Like that,” He moans.
 It’s not been long at all, but you can tell he’s close. The way he gets impossibly harder in your palm, and the damp patch that you feel every time your brush over the tip, are complete giveaways. He inhales deep breaths through his teeth, chest heaving before he sighs out shaky moans and groans. 
 “How long’s it been?” You’re nosy as usual. Your hand speeds up, pressing a little rougher into him.
 “Since the divorce so… 8? 9 months? Wait I-” He pauses, breaths coming out in accelerated little puffs. The hand he has over yours squeezes tightly, trying to halt your movements. His cock jumps in his underwear. “Slow- I’ll cum.” He chuckles softly, a little embarrassed.
 Your pussy throbs, and you know there’s a wet patch in your panties. You speed your hand up against his hold. He whines, squirming in your hand just a little. “Yeah?” you breathe. “You gonna cum for me, Jeongguk?”
 Jeongguk’s breathing is coming out in shattered exhales and when you bite at his neck he gasps. He wonders if you’re being playful like you’ve always been, or if you’re just as worked up as him, biting to release the tension boiling just under your skin.
 “Please,” He says, so wrecked. He doesn’t even know what he’s begging for. Does he want you to stop before he soaks his pants like a horny teen? Or does he want you to keep going, so he can finally finish in a hand that’s not his own?
 Jeongguk doesn’t feel like he has a choice as his orgasm rushes him. His mind is far away, and all reason is out the door, cumming the only thing at the forefront of his mind. He presses your palm into his cock hard and ruts up into it, his hips stuttering and thrusts erratic as he spills into his briefs, hot and wet against your hand.
 He doesn’t warn you at all, cums quietly in your palm. Body so tense, and face so obscene he looks like he’s in pain, like he came so hard that it hurt. You know your pussy aches.
 Once Jeongguk catches his breath, you're whipped around and pressed into the wall, taking his place. His lips meet yours instantly and before you can even kiss back, he’s already moving all over your body. Tiny kiss marks glistening here, there, everywhere. Your collarbones are decorated, as well as your cleavage. He toys with the zipper of your sports bra, looks like he’s thinking about pulling but ends up moving past it. One track mind, taking over.
 He settles on his knees, big hands roaming over your shirt before slipping underneath with a quick glance at you. He grips a little here, a little there. It’s like he’s admiring the curve at your waist, the dips of your hip bones. Every inch he can get his hands on.
 He pushes your shirt up to under your tits, and begins placing his soft, wet kisses all over again. His hands keep moving too, making goosebumps form all over your tummy. You feel him smile into your skin once he notices. He dips his tongue into your belly button making you giggle out a gasp. He bites at the dangling charm pulling just a little bit, before letting go and giggling with you. 
 “I love this… ‘s cute.” He says.
 You mumble a tiny thanks, as he nips at the softest part of your lower belly, right above the elastic of your shorts.
 He rests his chin where he bit just a moment before, looking up at you, pretty doe eyes sparkling. “Can I?” He asks.
 You wiggle a little under his gaze but nod, nonetheless.
 When your shorts and underwear hit the floor Jeongguk lets out the littlest gasp. You feel his fingers come up and settle on your hips caressing softly again, while his eyes are trained on your cunt. He licks his lips absently.
 “It’s so cute…” He says. He sounds a little awestruck as he brings his fingers down to stroke over the smooth, plump lips of your pussy. He pinches them between his thumb and index finger, and a little bit of your slick oozes out, leaving you shiny and glossy. 
 Typically, you wouldn't compare your cunt to something from the ocean, but it really was like a little clam. Your pussy lips the shell, and your clit a small little pink pearl tucked perfectly inside. 
 He sighs as he leans in and presses a gentle kiss just above your slit. Your breath stutters as you breathe in, looking down at him. He keeps kissing gently, slowly but surely moving where you want him most, but you're impatient, already trembling from how bad you want his mouth. 
 Your hips buck when you feel his mouth on your lips over your clit. All he needs to do is slip his tongue right there…
 “Please,” You whine, so so quietly. 
 But he hears you. And he groans, from deep within his chest, and you can see him bring a hand down to press at his cock. He sounds pained, overwhelmed as he rests his forehead on your belly. “Fuck don’t beg. I’ll give you whatever you want just-” He pecks your mound quickly, one more time. “Don’t beg.” 
 He suspires and finally fulfills your request. His tongue disappears between your plush little folds, the tip of it licking over your clit. You gasp at the first feel of his tongue on you, mouth falling open while you watch him. He looks up at you, eyes hazy and full of desire, shining with such obvious lust and adoration. 
 The way he looks at you, like you’re something more than sexual tension finally coming to a head, makes you dizzy. You squirm looking away for a moment. His eyes are too tender for the filthy atmosphere around you, too tender for the reality of your situation.
 When you look down at him again, you brush some hair out of his eyes, hand settling in the long strands. His eyes flutter shut, and he kind of pushes into your hold before he blinks up at you, a sultry look on his face, eyes hooded and dark. You see him smile softly, a soft laugh puffing against you before he nips at your mons lightly. Then his tongue is lazily slipping between your slit giving long, slow, filthy licks to your clit. He’s already got the thick, hot feeling of arousal curling in your tummy.
 Your free hand comes down and you slip your fingers between your folds, spreading yourself open with your index and ring finger, while pulling your hood back with the middle one, revealing your clit to him. Showing him exactly where you want him.
 Again, he looks at your pussy like it's the prettiest, most lush thing he’s ever seen. He brings his hand up and rubs over your nub with a single finger, looking up once more to see how your eyelashes kiss your cheeks as your eyes flutter closed and your brows pinch. 
 “It’s so tiny…” he presses a little harder, rubs a little faster. “I’ve heard that the smaller it is, the more sensitive?” He phrases it like a question. “Is that true?”
 “I think?” It comes out airy and distracted. You don’t really know. Makes sense you suppose. More nerves in a smaller area. But you don’t care at the moment.
 He hums. “I think so too… Just look at you.”
 You grip his hair pulling just the slightest amount. Not demanding, just suggesting… hoping. 
 “Lick it?” You whisper, voice salacious and pleading. 
 He holds your gaze and does as you ask, licking softly, almost teasing. His head moves in a nodding motion as his tongue repeatedly grazes over your exposed clit, you can feel his breath hot against your fingers. It’s soft and slow, and just not enough. You whine as you roll your hips to meet his tongue and it’s pornographic, the way you can see a little string of spit and slick still connecting you together right before his tongue meets your clit again.
 “Point your tongue… faster- yeah flick it… fuck,” you whimper. It’s airy and the lust you’re feeling is tangible, just pouring from you. From your lips, your pussy. Your head falls back hitting the wall behind you. You’re sighing and nodding. Encouraging him, letting him know that yes, right there, that’s perfect. 
 The way your orgasm builds takes you by surprise. It starts as that gentle simmer curling in your belly and grows until it’s that sharp pleasure in your chest, taking your breath away. You normally can’t cum just from someone’s mouth, usually needing fingers as well, but Jeongguk’s tongue is magic and the way he suctions gently, making little pulsing sensations with his lips, is ruining you and your legs are starting to shake. 
 “Please… please make me cum,” You beg. “I’m so close Jeongguk please.”
 He groans and the vibrations thrum, heavenly against you as you watch his eyes roll back. His hands grip at your ass and pull you closer to his mouth. 
 “Fuck baby watch me. Look at me while you fall apart on my tongue.” He moans quickly against your cunt. The pet name that accidentally slips from his lips makes you buzz.
 And you do. You look at him and his tongue working wet and nasty against you; it’s the only thing he needs to wreck you. You watch as long as you can until the pleasure is too much and the string in you snaps, eyes falling shut as you moan out a litany of praises full of yes’s and his name. You cum, writhing against the wall. 
 Jeongguk’s on his feet and you’re off of yours, his hands coming up to cup your ass and hoist you against the wall. Your hands wrap around his neck, legs around his waist, and you smile at him as you regulate your breathing. He kisses you, and you whine when you taste yourself on his tongue.
 “I wanna- can I fuck you?” He whispers against your lips, between eager kisses. He presses into you, making you feel how hard he is again. You wonder if it even went down after he came.
 “Please,” you say nodding.
 He nips at your jaw and you feel his smile as he places a peck to soothe. “What did I say about begging?”
 You’re about to reply but gasp instead as you feel him move away from the wall to carry you effortlessly through his home. It’s big and modern, spacious with minimalistic decor, sprinkled with baby stuff here and there. You feel the plush cushion of his bed under you some moments later. He’s over you in an instant, licking into your mouth once again, body molding to yours. He rolls his hips a few times when you wrap your legs around his waist, before pulling away, your lips are the last thing to part, like he can’t get enough for you.
 “I’ll be right back,” he says. Another light kiss is given before he disappears into what you assume is the bathroom.
 You figure he’s cleaning up the mess he made earlier and probably getting condoms. You glance at the crib by the side of his bed that has yet to be removed. Hopefully, he’s getting condoms. If not, you think you have one in your bag. 
 You busy yourself by getting ready for him, taking your shirt and bra off leaving you completely nude. You flop back onto his bed and stretch your arms out, it’s big enough that you can starfish and not have your hands or feet hang off. It smells like a subdued, softer version of him. Less fragrant and cologne-y and more clean and gentle, like laundry detergent and the little trace of body wash that lingers on his skin after a shower. It’s earthy, and kind of feminine. You roll over and shove your face in his pillow, inhaling deeply. Sandalwood you think. You know you don’t have much time when you hear the faucet shut off, and drawers being rummaged through, so you settle on to your back again, lazily running your fingers over your body, waiting for him.
 The bathroom opens and Jeongguk walks out, naked as well. He’s stroking himself slowly as he strides towards you, his other hand full of the goods. Your eyes zero in on his cock. Out of his briefs you can clearly see just how big he is. You gulp.
 He climbs onto the bed and settles between your legs again when you open easily for him. You run your hands over his body, feeling the ripples of his muscles running under his skin. Fingertips touch at the ink on his shoulder. You were right, a full sleeve. 
 He’s looking at you, searching your face, hand brushing gently at your hair. “You still wanna?”
 You don’t hesitate to nod. “Mhmm.” You sit up and peck his lips sweetly. “Please,” You tease with a smile.
 He rolls his eyes playfully and sits back on his heels, reaching for the condom that he set aside. There’s a bottle of lube next to it. You sigh internally, grateful and knowing you’re going to need it.
 You crawl in front of him. 
 He places a hand on your head, making you stop abruptly and laugh on all fours.
 “I won’t last if you blow me.” He says.
 You pout, then mirror his position in front of him. “Can I put it on for you, then?”
 He quirks a brow, but hands the foil packet to you, only to get it back when you have trouble opening it due to your nails. You smile sheepishly at him and kiss him sweetly when he hands it to you again. You stroke his bare cock just a few times, eyes on his face when he hisses at the feel of your hand on him without any clothes in the way. You can’t help yourself; you lean down and lick at the shiny, dripping tip, swirling your tongue around the head. You flick your tongue, and stroke, his foreskin rolling over, as his eyes roll back. His hips buck just barely, before you feel a hand in your hair pulling you up.
 He’s laughing and presses his face into your cheek. “You don’t listen well, do you? Hmm?”
 You pull away just enough to look down and place the condom at the tip of his cock, pinching just a little at the top as you slowly roll it down his length. “I just know what I want.” you whisper, tongue in cheek. His thighs tense and he takes a sharp breath, mirroring you and looking down.
 With your hand on him, the apprehension starts to set in. He’s thick. And long. Your hands are small, barely able to wrap around the girth.
 “Fuck…” He whispers. He grabs your other hand and places it on his cock as well, one on top of the other, his pink tip still sticking out the top. “Your hands look so good around me.”
 You stroke him with both hands, slowly over the condom. “You’re- like the biggest I’ve ever seen.”
 Jeongguk must hear the nervous tone your voice has taken because he places his hands on your face and has you look at him. Your hands don’t leave him, anxious but still eager. “I’ll go slow, and if you need me to stop I will. Just tell me.” He kisses you again, and you nod against his lips before falling back onto his pillows.
 The lubes within reach so you grab it and drizzle some onto your fingers before bringing them down and rubbing over your opening. You’re wet already, of course, but you’re gonna need all the help you can get with him. You know it won’t be that bad, and that your body will do what it’s supposed to. You think that maybe it is a mix of being with someone new, someone that you’ve been wanting, as well as his size that has you on edge. When Jeongguk finds his way between your legs, you drizzle some lube onto his cock as well, stroking to make sure he is thoroughly covered before lining him up. You take a deep breath.
 Jeongguk’s patient. When the swollen tip of his cock slips in all he does is furrow his brow and drop his mouth open, keeping control and resisting the instinctual urge to bury himself inside of your warm, tight, soaking cunt.  He’s over you braced on his forearms, head hanging, watching his engorged cock slip into you little by little, your fat pussy lips pillowing around his girth. He flicks his eyes up to you when he reaches the thickest part of his cock. A worried wrinkle forms between his brows.
 For good reason. It hurts. You feel annoying pricks of tears sting your eyes. A little whimper passes your lips when he pushes in another inch more.
 “So big, Gguk,” You whisper. Your hands are on his back, digging in trying to focus on the give of his muscles when you press your nails into his skin.
 He’s quick, kissing on your face gently, telling you that you’re doing so well, and that it’s almost over, and that he's almost in. He brings a hand between your bodies and rubs at your clit, slowly, trying to distract you from the sting as best he can.
 It works. His fingers are skilled, and you want him so badly despite the little ache, and then he’s inside of you. He’s buried to the hilt, and you both sigh into each other’s mouths.
 “I need a second now,” He laughs on a whisper. “You’re so tight, feel so good around me.” He coos, praising you. Letting you know just how good you did. His face is in your neck, kissing, sucking little pink flowers into your skin. His hands come up to your tits once he’s settled back on his knees, and he squeezes them, jiggles them lightly. 
 He drools at how they rest into soft circles as you lay on your back beneath him. He pulls out a few inches before pushing back in slowly, biting his lip when he sees them bounce before pillowing back into place. He does it a few more times, making quiet moans fall from your lips.
 With Jeongguk inside of you, you can understand how he knocked someone up. His stroke is so good and skilled, making you feel every inch of him every time he makes your hips meet. Pussy swallowing his cock, wet and slick. You never want him to leave, never want him to stop fucking you. Want to wrap your legs around him and keep him inside of you forever. The sting of the stretch has long subsided, his cock now satisfyingly sliding against your sensitive walls, filling you up so well, the tip kissing your g spot every time he angles his hips just right. 
 “You feel so fucking good,” He moans. He’s looking down at where his hips are now slamming into you with long steady plunges. One leg is wrapped around his waist, the other pushed back, resting on his shoulder. “‘M gonna make you cum,” He tells you. Looking at you, holding eye contact, watching every little shift in your features as pleasure courses through your veins. “Just from my cock.” The pace he plunges into you is fast, strokes consistent and long, as his hair swings around his face with every thrust. “On every part of me. With my tongue and my cock in your little pussy today, my fingers next time.” He continues, kissing you softly. The juxtaposition between his sweet actions and filthy words makes your cunt pulse around him. “Does that sound good baby? Hmm? Do you want that?”
 You nod desperately. “Yeah, wanna fuck you all the time. Love your fat cock, Jeongguk.” You’ve got a hand clawing into his back, another raised over your head, so you don’t hit the headboard due to the force of his thrusts.
 Jeongguk groans, and shudders. His cock throbs, you can feel it jerk inside you. He slows for just a moment before he picks back up again, faster and harder and deeper. “Fuck, look at you. Taking my cock so well.” Every word is punctuated by him pounding into you. “You’re such a good girl, such a good fucking girl.” The slap of his hips is as loud as your moans, his words doing something insane to your body, cunt tightening as he makes good on his promise. Bringing you to the edge with just his cock. 
 He reads you well for a first-time fuck. “Are you close?” He asks.
 Your eyes are shut and you’re quieting, body tensing and locking up as you get closer and closer to your orgasm. All you do is nod.
 He moans, higher pitched than before and you feel his hips lose their rhythm for a second before recovering. “Ask me,” He pants. “Ask me if you can cum.”
 Your eyes open and he’s looking at you with a sort of abashed expression on his face. A peek at the timid, shy Jeongguk you knew before you met the one fucking you into his matress. You agree easily with a jerky nod, letting him take control, tell you what to do. He said he would give you whatever you want, and you’ll do the same for him. Anything to make him feel as good as he’s making you.
 It’s not long before you’re doing what he asks.
 “Gguk… I’m gonna- Can I-” Your body shakes, and you turn your head to the side, trying to hide from him. “Please can I cum?” You mewl.
 You feel him grip your jaw, turning your face and making you look at him. “Yeah baby, cum for me. Lemme see.” His hand keeps a hold on you, and his hips never stop the whole time the rush burns through you. Your eyes are closed as you clench and cream on his cock, but he watches you. The way you don't know what to do with your hands, settling for pulling at his sheets. He watches every phase of your climax pass over your face. The look of almost confusion as you get overwhelmed, the devastating pleasure as you peak, the serene smile as you start to come down. 
 His hips slow, but don’t stop. He kisses you deep, before murmuring against your red bitten lips, fingers still gripping your jaw, keeping you where he wants you. “What do you say?”
 You know what he wants to hear, you give in effortlessly. It’s soft and saccharine sweet when you say, “Thank you.” 
 The submission does something to Jeongguk and his hold gets almost painful, before he sits up, and switches to grabbing at your hips, pulling you down onto his cock. “Good, you’re so good. Gonna make me fucking cum.”
 You nod, watching him while lying on your back. Tits bouncing every time he pumps his cock into you, frantic and needy. His hands on your hips are bruising, and his eyes are stuck on the way your pink pussy is getting beat up by his fat cock. He grabs one of your hands and brings it to his chest, urging you to rub your fingers over his nipple.
 “Yeah, touch me,” He whimpers as his head falls back and he moans shamelessly. “Fuck. Gonna cum.”
 He’s so beautiful when he does. His face is flushed, and he looks at you until he can't keep his eyes open, mouth parted, sporadic huffs falling from his lips as his chest heaves before his whole body tenses and jerks. He chokes out the softest, “Cumming.” and you feel him press into you as far as he can, spilling into the condom. His tattoos are a lovely contrast to his fair skin, the way the dark ink shines due to the light sheen of sweat coating his body is captivating. His neck is strong, and you spy a couple of little bruises that you don’t even remember leaving, but they look almost as pretty as his tattoos. When he looks at you again, you feel new waves of arousal flicker. He looks almost lost and overcome with the pleasure he’s feeling, eyes so dark and hooded, body still trembling a little as he keeps his hips moving in the smallest minute little thrusts, milking his cock of everything, like he never wants to pull out.  
 But of course, he does. Tying off the condom and plopping it onto his nightstand. He lays next to you, not too close, but his hand reaches out to play with yours laying by your side. He hums before laughing. It’s airy, both of you still catching your breath.
 “I can’t believe we christened my daughter's room.”
 You laugh with him, rubbing a hand over your face kind of embarrassed. You roll to face him. “Sorry you just- make me so crazy.”
 He faces you as well, and his eyes are sparkling with laughter. He pokes you in the forehead, “You make me crazy. You make my morals nonexistent.” He kisses your cheek softly before heaving himself up. “And I think that’s the cue for the wine.” He grabs a pair of new briefs from his dresser pulling them on before he grabs something from a different drawer and throwing it at you. One of his shirts. Walking towards the door, he turns to you. “Want a glass?”
 You fiddle with the shirt in your hands. “It’s getting late, maybe I should-”
 “You can stay.” He interrupts. He’s not looking at you, fingernails suddenly very interesting.
 “Do you want me to?” You ask.
 He shrugs. “I mean you still have to help me finish Nari’s room. You were the one that distracted us by jumping off a stepstool to get your hands on me.” He’s smirking when your head whips up to look at him, expression appalled. 
 “I did not jump. I fell.”
 He rolls his eyes, a big smile replacing the smirk. “Yeah, okay.”
 “Fuck you, go get the wine Daddy.”
helloooo! thank you for reading friends 🥺 i hope you liked it. i’ve got one thing to say..... nari main character.... please like and reblog  if you enjoyed, tell ya friends, drop a comment, leave a note, send an ask... lemme know ur thoughts pals ily <3
series masterlist, pt 1, pt 2, pt 3
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balenciaguks · a month ago
ROCKSTAR 101 | jjk (m) - coming soon
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❀ ⇢ pairing: jjk x f!reader
❀ ⇢ genre: smut, pwp
❀ ⇢ word count: tbc, currently 5.3k
❀ ⇢ theme: we finally have rockstar jungkook (he plays electric guitar) , established relationship, smut , just pure unadulterated filth 
❀ ⇢ rating: explicit
❀ ⇢ summary: In the words of Christina Aguilera, “there's nothing more dangerous than a boy with charm” and Jungkook is certainly coated in it.
❀ ⇢ warnings: JUNGKOOK HAS A FULL SLEEVE - think sowoozoo jungkook in the black tee , hard dom!jungkook , sub!reader , bratty reader with bratty behaviour , koo is a lil mean bcs he gives no attention , jords’ awful attempt at brat taming , very slight switch jungkook if u squint real hard , use of derogatory terms - for example slut ect , jungkook in a pair of bunny ears sksks , sex in the form of - pussy slapping , spanking , mouth stuffing , choking , panty sniffing , unprotected sex but oc is on the pill (wrap it b4 u tap it) , oral (m & f receiving) , face fucking , size kink , belly bulging , bdsm themes - for example use of PINK HEART SHAPED HANDCUFFS & mention of oc having a safe word , doggy style , saliva - the return of jords’ spitting kink so expect a few of that , messy sex , messy kissing , missionary bcs koo has pretty eyes n im a sucker for all the eye contact , non-penetrative ass grinding (hehe cheeky) , failed attempt at edging , multiple orgasms bcs jungkook has staMINA , throatpie (hehe) followed by cum dribbling & creampies
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xpeachesncream · 5 months ago
how many drinks? | one shot (jjk)
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summary: the question is - how many drinks would it take for you to sleep with your bestfriend?
pairing: jjk x reader
genre: (18+) college au, dance group au, bestfriends/bestfriends with some benefits au | fluff, smut, sprinkle of angst
words: ~12.2k
warnings: cussing, mature language/implied sexual content, kind of crack-y, dancer!jk to fulfill my needs, unprotected sex, sprinkle of dirty talk, fingering, sprinkle of a handjob, slight biting, nails digging into skin, oc almost gets taken advantage of/forced into doing things she doesn’t wanna do, rough handling, song kang is in this too because i’m also a hooch for him but he’s an ass here, alcohol consumption, intoxication, mentions of blunts/smoking, house parties, cuddling, kissing/makeout sessions, straddling, breast/nipple play, hickeys, fucking on the edge of the bed, multiple orgasms, fingering, licking/neck kisses, oral (f. receiving)
note: one shot title is taken from miguel's song ‘how many drinks’ + a couple of things--
both hoseok and jimin’s piece mentioned below are inspired by real-life pieces my old dance mentor has choreographed and taught. this is the inspiration behind hoseok’s couple piece; this is the inspiration for jimin’s piece
i’m a hooch for all three of them in this video
enjoy imagining koo and oc dancing part of their couples piece like this 🥺
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"Y/N." You picked up Jungkook's call as you sat at your desk in your dorm room. You had been finishing up your bio homework until the interruption came blaring through on your headphones.
"Can I nap in your room?"
"The fuck I look like? A hotel?" You snorted.
"Yeah, a 5 star at that with how good you take care of me." He tries to butter you up, causing you to roll your eyes.
"You're lucky I like you."
"Yesssssssss!" You hear him faintly exclaim on the other line. "Be there in a sec."
"You know my doors are always unlocked." Which, it was true. So many of your friends had decided to live off campus that you and your other bestfriend [and beloved suitemate] were probably the only few left on campus. And that meant people were constantly in your room, hanging out or using both of your rooms, [with permission] or the couches in the shared living room space of your suite as a place to nap. College, amirite? Why the fuck would you lose your parking spot to go back to your apartment when you have friends who lived right on campus? You weren't just good for smuggling free food from the cafeteria to your broke ass, struggling off-campus friends.
Sooner or later, you're greeted by a fluffy, black-haired Jungkook, looking like his shit must have air-dried with how wavy and voluminous it was. He swings your door open so aggressively that you jump a bit in your seat, swinging off your headphones like you weren't even expecting him. You watch as he flings himself onto your neatly made bed like he hasn't felt a bed in years.
"Ugh, yes." He moans as he belly flops onto your bed and stays in that position.
"When's your next class, you little baby?"
"In like an hour or so, I don't know." He says sleepily. "Wake me up, please?"
"Sure." You realize it's Wednesday, and he definitely has Ecology lab later at 3:00PM. You figured you'd wake him up by 2:30 just to give him enough time to groggily walk his ass back over to the science building.
You and Jungkook weren't really close before college. It was moreso that you knew of each other since high school because of mutual friends. You'd see him at parties and he'd see you, but it was never more than the casual hi and bye and small talk. Maybe the occasional comments on facebook pages and the likes on pictures on instagram. But foreel, other than that, that's as real as your friendship got for awhile. You didn't mind it though, you were good with your set of friends and he was good with his. A lot of your friends attended the same university as you two and then your groups intertwined even more. 
But, it wasn't until the past couple of months or so where you both unexpectedly got really close - simply just by talking more and being around each other more. You both had similar interests and Jungkook wasn't the most vocal in his group, but with you, he seemed to talk endlessly. He loved comics and he loved raving to you about Marvel and DC superheroes. He loved to draw, and he'd draw you things every now and then - his most recent being you as a scientist superhero saving the world from overgrown malaria-infected mosquito monsters. It was the cutest thing you had ever seen, and you tacked it against your cork board near your desk. Then, small things like that turned to bringing you food or boba, being stuck at the hip where he'd only go to a certain place on campus if you were there; texting each other inside jokes and funny ass tweets all day turned to facetime sleepover calls and then late hangouts eventually turned to actual sleepovers in your bed, where he'd drape his arm around while you both slept but it never escalated into anything more than that in bed. Although he did fucking hate your medium-sized Olaf plushie that took shelter on your bed - he'd always hike it across the room and talk about how annoying he is and how he's always taking his spot. You never understood it, really.
And then soon, it turned to small displays of affection behind closed doors, where Jungkook would hold you close. Hold your hand if you two were in the room watching a show, or movie. Small kisses exchanged. Big kisses exchanged, making out sessions. But, that was literally it. Nothing else. No sex. No pressure. Lots of unspoken feelings, obviously, but you weren't gonna be the one to bring that up. Because you were comfortable, and if anything, you didn't wanna ruin what you guys already had going.
Like, is this a friends with benefits thing? Maybe? Maybe not? It was hard to label it because it's not like you both determined so, it kind of just fell together that way. And there was really no pressure to fuck every single time you got affectionate. It was cute, sweet. And no one really knew it was like that behind doors - possibly your suitemate Kass and her boyfriend, Jimin, but that's only because you shared the dorm suite with her. Jimin was also one of Jungkook's roommates and his really good friend, so whenever they had slept over on the same night, it was pure and utter chaos. But honestly, if Kass and Jimin hadn't been around you two much, they most certainly wouldn't have the idea.
Whatever it was, it was a comfortable closeness that you both experienced and appreciated. However, the both of you were afraid of discussing what this really was, afraid it'll ruin the dynamic. The atmosphere. Having to come to terms of what it might, or might not be. Neither of you can fully admit that you like the other. Although, it got hard. People did lightly tease you two because you both always looked for each other and were stuck by the hip out on campus.
Oh, well. Bottom line is that you liked your relationship where it was at, but it doesn't mean you haven't thought about the what if's. Jungkook was insanely attractive, and it's no lie that girls swarmed him left and right on campus, but he didn't give a shit [either he didn't give a shit or he was dumb as hell?]. Okay, rewind — to be fair, he would have a fling or two, flirt once or twice. He'd tell you so and so was cute and that they've hung out or texted, but that's it. He just wasn't necessarily looking for anything cause he too enjoyed where he was at with everything.
It doesn't take long before Sleeping Beauty is snoring face down on your bed, looking like Patrick Star with the way he's sprawled out. But, you continue to do your work until it was time to wake him. You gently shake him, his puppy eyes looking back at you after being face down all nap.
"Class time."
"No." He groans. "Can't I just stay here with you?"
"No, dude. Get to class." You chuckle. "You already skipped last week."
"Yeah, but this is a new week Y/N."
"Jungkook." You almost say in a scolding manner.
"Fiiiiiiine." He whines as he shoots up and hops off from your bed. "Are you going to our party on Friday?"
"I said I'd think about it right?"
"Yeah, like on Monday. It's Wednesday."
"And I'm still thinking about it." You snort, making him pout.
"Just come for a little bit."
"Why? You know parties aren't my thing and you'll be too drunk anyways. I'll end up wanting to go right the fuck back home as soon as I step outside."
"I'd like to be drunk and have you there. It'll be more fun!" He pouts as he holds your hand and swings it back and forth.
"I mean, to be completely honest, I'll probably end up going because of Kass anyways."
"Because of Kass." He rolls his eyes. "Oooookay. Not because of you, Jungkook, no." He says sarcastically, brows furrowed.
"Ew. You're such a fucking whiner. Leave." You laugh, throwing an empty water bottle at him.
"I'm kidding." He chuckles. "Wanna grab dinner with me after practice?"
"Sure. If you pay." He groans
"Fine. I'll see you later." He puckers up his lips to blow you a kiss, which you automatically reject by giving him a look before turning your attention back to your homework. You were hoping he'd offer to go to In-n-Out because you were craving that #2 with animal fries and a neapolitan shake, plus there was a Target in the same plaza that you wanted to drag him to for new pens and clearance sale shopping. And you wouldn't even warn him about it. He would tag along, no question.
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Hoseok stands in front of the mirrors in the studio, pacing back and forth as your dance group learned a couple of 8-counts from this new piece he had been brewing up. Apparently, it was supposed to be a couples piece but he wasn't sure if he was going to keep it that way. He watched to see if this would be better as a group, or if he should stick to his original plans.
Your college dance group was a small group formed by people with pure, genuine interest and love for modern hip hop choreography. Hoseok was the dance lead, with Jimin being the back up lead. The group came together, taught each other pieces, taught workshops for those interested on campus and performed at the various talent shows and productions the school had throughout the year. It was just your group's way of showcasing your talents, something you all purely enjoyed, and it was nice to see the love and support given by the audiences.
"Okay, run that from the top one more time please. We'll take break after, swear." Hoseok chuckles and gives Jimin the cue to start the song back at the starting point. Jungkook makes a funny face at you as he huffs and puffs, trying to catch his breath from the last time you went through the counts.
"Ew." You giggle, slightly pushing him aside. Miguel's How Many Drinks begins to blast through the studio speakers, Jungkook doing his best to sing along and match his tone all while focusing on his steps. Once you're done going through the counts, the music continues to play, Jungkook twirling over to you just to sing—
"Cause I ain't leavin' aloneeee, I feel like I could be honest, babe." He spins to your other side. "We both know that we're grown, that's why I wanna knooooow - how many drinks will it take you to leave with meeeeEEeeeE?"
"You can give me all the drinks in the world and I swear I still wouldn't." You snort, making him frown and click his teeth.
"Too bad that's not really how you act when I ask to sleep over, though." Silence as you stick your tongue out at him. Cause, yeah. You really do tell him to sleep over without hesitation. You loved his company, you can’t lie. "Yeah, fraudulent as hell. I never taught you that." He jokes.
"Shut up, Jungkook—"
"Okay!" Hoseok says, clapping his hands. "This'll be a couple piece. I honestly think it'll work better that way, just like I envisioned it. I'll work with the couple to clean this up before the performance, but to whoever isn't casted for this, Jimin still has a piece to teach the rest of you, so don't feel discouraged!" Hoseok chuckles a bit, giving the rest of the group a small smile. "So with that being said - Y/N, Jungkook, I want you two to do this piece."
"Ouuuuuuuu." Jimin teases you from the sidelines, causing you to put up your middle finger.
"We won’t let you down, cap." Jungkook swings his arm around you.
"I'll teach you the rest of the piece next practice so we can start polishing it up and making it clean before the talent show."
"Sounds good with me." You flatly say, even though 100%, you're pretty excited for many reasons. One, you had been wanting to do a solo or couples piece for awhile, and two, your partner was Jungkook. Your best friend, your ride or die, the dude you've spent so much time with and gave your affection to behind closed doors. It made you giddy just thinking about it, even if you'd blatantly lie to his face later on when he'd tease you. And Jungkook felt the same. You missed the way he subtly bit on his bottom lip when you were named his partner, just so he wouldn't smile too big in front of you.
After practice, you egg him on enough to agree to take you to In-N-Out, without hinting at the plan you had drafted out in your head earlier.  The plan that says you're gonna drag his ass to Target afterwards and he had no choice but to come along.
"Y/N, you liar." He groans. "You said you weren't gonna go to Target." He pouts as you follows behind you anyway.
"Kook, I literally just need to get one thing."
"What's the one thing that you couldn't get on your own time?"
"I don't know, I'll have to find out when we get in there." You giggled, causing him to groan again. "Plus, we're here already. Killing two birds with one stone."
"Ah shit, I suppose I can get some bottles for the party."
"Yeah, make yourself useful Jungkook."
"Yeah, make yourself useful Jungkook, aheh." He mocks your tone and does that really weird and ugly ass laugh that dudes always do when they try to mock girls, however, you ignore it because you've just stepped into Target and bitch, this was Disneyland to you. Heaven. Paradise.
"Hm, what are we drinking on Friday?" He says his text outloud as he follows you around the dollar section where you begin to pick up really unnecessary items that you're probably just gonna store away in or around your desk somewhere.
"Should be holy water because you all need it."
"Mmm, I don't know, I don't think they have that but we can check." He responds ever so seriously, causing you to chuckle.
"How many people are you expecting?"
"Honestly, I don't even know. We said we'd keep it to close friends only. I don't really have any friends, so that's all on them."
"Ah, makes sense as to how the entire class was invited." You fire back sarcastically. "Your upstairs neighbors are really gonna have a blast."
"They're invited too."
"You guys are so dumb." He laughs when you hit him against the chest. After walking a bit, the two of you head towards the alcohol aisle, Jungkook grabbing what his arms will allow him to grab since alcohol is a little cheaper here than other grocery stores. "Isn't there a limit as to how much alcohol you can buy?"
"I don't see anything anywhere." He hauls about 4 big bottles back to the cashiers. "Besides, I'm giving them business compared to Safeway and those other grocery stores."
"Grab the coupon at least, genuis. It could save you some money." You take off the coupons from the three bottles.
He looks down at the coupon attached to the 4th bottle. "Sign up today and get 2% cash back on every bottle you buy." He snorts after reading the coupon outloud. "More like sign up today and get 2% cash back turnt." He looks at you. "This doesn't sound like a coupon, miss. Where's the ‘get 5 dollars off’ bullshit?"
"2% cash back turnt? Really?" You furrow your brows at him and hand the coupons to the cashier. "Here. God, maybe you shouldn't be hosting parties with your roommates."
"Maybe not." He holds his bags, even grabbing onto yours as you both walk out to his car. He turns up the radio, the both of you singing along to the songs coming through. When he pulls up to the lot of Edgehill Village, he parks in someone else's marked spot only because it's technically next to your door and he doesn't anticipate to stay long. But honestly, that never goes as planned. He grabs your bag from the trunk, silently following behind you as you unlock your door to an empty suite - just as you expected. Kass was most likely at Jungkook’s, spending the night with Jimin, and you'd be alone for the night. It didn't matter to you though, the peace and quiet was always nice.
"You sure you're gonna be okay here alone?" You nod.
"Yup. It's kind of nice actually." You lean forward onto your bed since it's raised a little higher than usual with bed risers, and open up your laptop. Jungkook sets your Target bag down and wraps his arms around you from behind, planting a kiss on your cheek and on your jawline.
"You sure you don't want me to sleep over? Cuddles sound nice."
"It sounds like you want to."
"Only if you want me to." He nuzzles his head against your neck, waiting for your response.
"Kook, please." You chuckle. "If you wanna sleepover, then go ahead."
"Yesssss! I do."
"Well you need to find parking, or else the person that owns that parking spot will be highly upset."
"You got it, captain. Pull up a movie!" He says, dashing out of your room to move his car. He's most likely going to come back in another 5 minutes, being that the only free parking at this time of night is probably on the other end in the gym's lot, or somewhere on the streets [if he got lucky].
And so that 5 minutes sure does go by before Jungkook is breathing heavily when he walks into your room, duffle bag swung over his shoulder with a big, dorky ass smile on his face.
"I'm back!"
"I see." You snort, still going through the movies.
"Hey, let's run through what Hobi taught us first."
"Ugh, I'm so tired though."
"Cooooome on, just once." He pulls you by the hand, his body pressed against yours as his his other arm wraps around your waist. "Please." His puppy dog eyes look down at you, causing you to push him away because fucking hell, that shit makes you weak. Makes the pussy throb just a lil, you know? Christ.
"Only if you watch 10 Things I Hate About You."
"Sure, I don't mind." He pulls up the song on your laptop. The both of you face the mirror in front of you, careful not to hit each other since you had such limited space to fully move around. Running through it once was a full blown lie, being that you both are doing it for almost 5-6 times before you're laughing at how out of breath you already are. You're so out of it and winded by the last time around that you accidentally hit Jungkook in the face, causing him to whine and stumble off to the side.
"Oh shit!" You laugh. "I'm so sorry, Kookie!" You run over to cup his face. "Are you okay? You good?"
"Shit, Y/N. You have a heavy hand." He keeps his hand against his cheek.
"I'm sorry." You lean in to plant a kiss on his cheek, but Jungkook being Jungkook, he looks to the side to have his lips meet yours instead. He picks you up in one swift motion, your legs wrapped around his torso as he sits you on your bed, your hands still cupping his face. And honestly, you really wanted him. You've always wanted him since this whole thing started. God, he was attractive to you - every little thing about Jungkook was a fucking weakness, but you weren't gonna let up first. Not tonight. The scar on his cheek, his soft, fluffy hair, his toned body, his muscular ass arms, the way he held onto you when you both slept, the way he kissed you.
Lord, he was truly going to be the death of you.
Before the kiss could get any deeper, you smile into it and back away, keeping your gaze on the small, dazed smile Jungkook has on his face.
"Can we watch now?" You ask, subtly biting onto your bottom lip.
"Yeah, good idea."
"Actually, after all that, I need to shower first."
"Can I join?" His eyes light up.
"Sit your ass down. You can go after." You laugh as you hop off the bed, grabbing your pajamas for a quick shower. You literally take 10 minutes, walking back into your room with wet hair and an oversized shirt and shorts underneath. Although you had been completely comfortable with Jungkook, the both of you have never really seen each other fully naked like that. Whenever he slept over, you were both always fully clothed. You've seen him hop out of the shower and come in shirtless, but that's probably about it. You start to brush your teeth as he rummages through his emergency duffle bag full of shit that he holds in the trunk of his car, grabbing a fresh pair of clothes to change into after his shower. You already know his ass is gonna use your shampoo for everything because he loves the smell of it and always talks about how good your hair smells.
While waiting for him, you slip yourself under your covers and pull the laptop closer to you, scrolling through your phone aimlessly to see what's new on instagram. Which, is absolutely nothing, so you let out a dissatisfied sigh.
"Ready!" He comes in, tossing his towel aside and shutting off the lights to crawl into your bed with you.
"You smell just like me." You chuckle.
"It's great, isn't it?"
"Your hair isn't bothering you?" You run your hand through his incredibly wet hair as he shakes his head.
"No, I'll be good."
"Okay." He wraps his arm around you to pull you onto his body, the movie already off to a start. As the movie goes on, you find yourself getting sleep as both of your bodies sink deeper into the sheets, Jungkook still not letting you go. The laptop rests on his belly, while your head is on his chest, his heartbeat the one thing putting you to sleep pretty quickly. He's comfortable, just as you are. He's warm, you're warm. He's content, you're content. You drift off to sleep while he continues to watch, knowing your bodies will be pressed tightly against each other in the morning.
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"Kook there's so many fucking people here. The cops are gonna come and shut this down quick." Jungkook shrugs.
"Oh well, wasn't my idea." He snorts. "Shot?!" He hands you a shot that you take with ease, feeling like you aren't drunk enough for all this shit and all these people. "Atta girl."
"Yuck, though." You slightly make a sour face as you feel the warmth trickle down your throat and into your stomach.
"Heeeey, whyyyyy do you look so FaMiliaR?" This girl asks Jungkook in a weird, flirty tone, where every other consonant goes up and down. She's obviously really fucking drunk and out of her mind because for one, she definitely goes to the same school as you two, and she has definitely been in class with Jungkook before.
"Oh uh, my name's Justin Bieber. I used to sing from time to time." He says nonchalantly with you furrowing your forehead at him because what kind of response did he just give her?! What did he just tell her? You're so embarrassed that you slowly turn on your heel and walk out of the kitchen as you hear him sing One Less Lonely Girl hella out of tune, with the girl completely smitten over his drunk ass.
"Where's Jungkookie?" Kass asks as she sits on Jimin's lap.
"Over there, pretending to be Justin Bieber apparently."
"Oh, nice. You don't come across that often." Jimin says sarcastically. "Are you staying here tonight?"
"Yeah, stay here tonight, with Kookie." Kass wiggles her eyebrows, her cheek resting on top of Jimin's head. "It's not like that's anything new."
"Um, I'd rather much be back in the dorm."
"That cold, lonely place? When you could be here, in such a pretty apartment with such a pretty boy?" You shake your head at her.
"Unbelievable." You mutter. Suddenly, an incredibly tall man walks into the apartment, reaching about 6'1 and almost hitting the ceiling with his tall ass. You've never seen him before, but he walks in with Hoseok and Namjoon and for whatever reason, you can't peel your eyes off of him. "Woah, who's that?"
"Who's what?" Jungkook finally comes to your side after being Justin Bieber for a good minute or so, his eyes following yours. Who was he and why were you looking at him so intensely?
"That's Kang! You've never met him?" Jimin says, doing a slight nod to greet him as he passes by. Kang and his fine self looks up at you, a small smirk creeping up at the corner of his lips as he continues through to the kitchen behind Hoseok and Namjoon. "He's a transfer and on the basketball team."
"He's fiiiiine." You and Kass swoon over him a bit, Jungkook giving you a look.
"He's alriiiight. I've seen better."
"Shut up, no one asked you." You lightly punch him on the side, making him lightly groan while Jimin and Kass laugh. The rest of the party, you suddenly have a goal to find out more about Kang and see what he's about because you and Jungkook weren't official. You both didn't really know what this was, but one thing you knew for sure was that it wasn't anything exclusive. You wouldn't bring it up, so wouldn't Jungkook - so was this really something all that meaningful?
Whatever, you didn't wanna keep going in circles about it.
Jungkook fucking hates it though, and he's honestly really jealous that you're suddenly trying to be all cute and woo the new, tall, handsome [but he's not really that fucking handsome to Jungkook for christ's sake] basketball player. Jungkook almost wants to mock his every move and how suavé he is, almost looking like a try hard with the way he's leaning against the wall and talking to you.
Wait— he's talking to you?! You were literally right next to him 2 seconds ago.
"What the fuck?" He squints, trying to make sure he's actually looking at you.
"You're so full of shit." Jimin laughs.
"What are you talking about?"
"Why don't you just admit that you like her and stop being childish about it?"
"I don't like her. She's just my bestfriend."
"Um, okay?" Jimin snorts. "When you sleep at her place every chance you get and vice versa? When she has a ton of your shirts and hoodies in her own fucking closet? When you always get so affectionate with her in the dorm? Sure, you don't like her."
"How do you know that?"
"I just do, you've done it in front of me and Kass before but you both tried playing it off. I don't understand you two."
"Well, I don't like her. She obviously doesn't either with the way she's trying to be all up on him." Jungkook glares at you, his teeth biting the rim of the cup harshly as he brings it to his lips to take a sip.
"Whatever, I'm just saying dude. Probably better to be straight up about it than not."
"Kaaaaaaay." Jungkook responds sarcastically, trying to play off how butthurt he was right now. Cause yeah, he did fucking like you. He was just scared to admit it though because of reasons like this - the fact that you possibly didn't like him back killed him. The fact that you could possibly be using him to feel wanted, needed. It made his stomach turn.
He just really liked you, and god, did he want to be the one in your bed tonight. Whether or not that ended up in sex, whatever. He just wanted to be the one to touch you, be on you.
Meanwhile, Kang was attractive as hell and ouwee, were you feeling him tonight. You were, you really were - except, you could literally feel the holes Jungkook was burning through you from across the room. You'd occasionally glance over due to how distracting it was, Jungkook literally have no shame with eyeing you, almost glaring at you, from across the apartment.
"Is it too forward if I ask for your number already?" Kang licks his lips, his teeth lightly piercing his bottom lip as he looks down at you.
"No." You smirk at him, taking his phone to put your number in.
"We should kick it soon. I'd love to hang out with you and get to know you better."
"Yeah, just let me know when." You blush, until you're suddenly pulled out of your daze by a loud 'ahem,' the loudest throat-clearing you have ever heard in your life. You turn to see Jungkook making his way back over to the shots, knowing damn well he's calling you over. "See you around?" Kang winks before he tips his cup to you and gives you a single nod.
"Sure thing, cutiepie." You bite onto your bottom lip, making your way over to Jungkook at the shot station, instantly pinching his arm.
"What the fuck?"
"Nobody was calling you over." Jungkook smirks.
"Shut the fuck up, yes you were. I know that was you clearing your throat like that."
"I'm sorry, does it bother you?" He blinks cutely, tilting his head to the side. "Besides, why come over here when you're too busy with your man?"
"Are you jealous?"
"Why in the hell would I be jealous, Y/N? Do you." The words sting you, even though part of you still wants to believe that Jungkook may actually like you. All you can do is sigh and brush it off, placing your cup down in front of him as he pours himself another shot. "You sure?"
"Just give me the damn shot." You say, making it your 7th.
And the 7th turns into 8, 8 turns into 9, 9 turns into 10. And at 10, you're pretty fucking drunk even as the party is starting to die down by the time it's close to 2am. All 10 were a good combination of shots and mixed drinks.
10 drinks.
10 drinks is what it took for you to lay in Jungkook's bed at the end of the night, hands tangled in his fluffy hair as your makeout session intensifies by the minute - all due to this sexual tension, frustration, whatever the hell it was brewing between you two after all this time. The both of you are drunk as hell, and it's pretty evident with the way you can still taste the alcohol on his tongue, both sloppily touching up on each other, kisses getting wetter, clothes coming off like there's no tomorrow.
"Wait, are you sure?" Jungkook says, about to unhook your bra.
"Jungkook, god, just fuck me." You plead drunkily, the room spinning around you. He continues to unhook your bra, tossing it across the room where your other clothes lay, peppering kisses along your neck before licking up a stripe to meet your lips again. He hooks his fingers across the band of your panties, tugging them down and letting them get lost within his sheets. You take this as leverage to tug his boxer briefs down, already stroking his hardened member the moment you come into contact with it. The sad thing is that you both are so fucking drunk, you can't even appreciate the fact that you both are naked in front of each other for the first time ever.
You can't even come to terms with the fact that you both are about to fuck each other and cross that boundary completely.
But, hell, what do you care? You were drunk. You got a cute guy's number. You're getting dick at the end of the night.
"Oh shit, Y/N." He moans into your mouth as he feels you stroking him. "Need to feel you." He quickly runs his finger down your fold, slipping in two digits to pump them in and out, quickly prepping you for his dick.
"Hnnng--Kook." You bite onto your bottom lip as your eyes shut close momentarily, your head digging deeper into the pillow the more he tries to stretch you out. "Want you inside of me."
"I got you." He says. You almost whine at the loss of contact until you feel his tip poking at your entrance. He slowly continues to slip himself inside of you, Kook letting out a small groan while your mouth was left open, a soundless moan releasing before you hiss and take in all of him. He fills you up so well, so completely. He was so big that you felt full, bloated, with him being inside of you the way he was.
"Ohhhhhgod." You whimper as he starts to steady his pace, the lewd noises of his cock slipping in and out of your wet pussy filling his room - god forbid if Jimin or their other roommate Yoongi heard this right now. It would be nothing short of pornographic.
"You're so wet. Is that all for me?" He says, causing your eyes to roll to the back of your head as he begins to aggressively thrust into you.
"Y-yes." You whine.
"Say it again."
"All for you, Kook."
"I fucking thought so." He drunkily responds as one hand grips onto your hips tightly, the other in your hair as he digs his head back into the crook of your neck, his tongue messily licking near your jaw before he nibbles onto your earlobe.
"Hmmmmgggh, Jungkook. Fuck." You moan as you start to work your hips upward into his, your clit rubbing against his pelvis, causing the pleasure to pool quickly within the pit of your stomach. It causes goosebumps to pierce through the surface of your skin, your hands gripping tighter on his hair. "You're-you're gonna make me cum. Faster." You plead. He does just so, hammering into you, the sound of his hips slamming into yours bouncing off of the walls.
"Ahhh—Y/N." He groans.
"Just like that, just like that, just like that!" You repeat, your clit feeling incredibly stimulated by the way it rubs against his skin while he fucks into you. "Oh shit! Jungkook!" You moan loudly, biting his shoulder as you feel yourself trembling hard in his grip, your orgasm taking over your entire body.
"Shit, shit, shit—Y/N, Shiiiit." He says into your neck, followed by more curses and groans as you feel him coat your walls warmly. He stays inside of you until the both of you come back down to normalcy, your breathing becoming more regulated. He slowly slips himself out, plopping next to you on the bed, but doesn't welcome you into his arms.
The night goes on, the both of you sleeping on your own sides of Jungkook's bed, not really saying a word to each other. Because the both of you, although still pretty drunk, are more aware by the time it's over and it's become so clear how fucked up this got.
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You were hurt. Completely hurt. Because you didn't expect Jungkook to just fucking ghost you after that night. You wanted to talk about it, maybe come to the conclusion that you two should just distance yourselves from each other to figure this out, even if it would hurt you a lot to do so.
That morning, Jimin and Kass had to take you back to campus because Jungkook had darted out of his room, nowhere to be seen until later that night. The next week or so, there were no texts, no calls. No visiting your dorm, no asking to sleepover.
Just radio silence, white noise, if you will.
The one thing he could come up with was a stupid response to your text when you finally caved and asked what you did wrong mid-week.
Something along the lines of 'what do you want me to say, Y/N? do you want me to force myself to feel a certain way?'
Followed by a 'i'm sorry, fuck. that came out really wrong' even though you thought it came out perfectly fine. You understood loud and clear.
Even though this wasn't really an exclusive thing, or even a 'thing' if we wanna be straight up, you still couldn't help but feel like Jungkook had just dumped your ass with no explanation and you were still waiting for that explanation to come, whether it would or not. And because of this, you started to see Kang, hangout with him more often. He even took you out on a dinner date and you really enjoyed his company. He seemed genuine, caring, supportive - even if a lot of the basketball boys were the complete opposite. He was different, you liked to think.
And so you stand in front of the mirrors in the dance studio, you and Jungkook awkwardly running through the piece with Hoseok watching, confused as to why all of a sudden the two of you have this weird tension going on. It hasn't entirely ruined the couple piece, but it hasn't brought it together, either. The both of you could barely look at each other, barely get into the movements, the emotions behind the motions. Hoseok had to correct a few things, his 'pah pah pah's' echoing in the room constantly with how many times you and Jungkook had to be set straight for your sloppy steps today.
"Okay, I'm not saying it's bad, cause it's not. But can you both please act like you at least like each other or something? What's going on with you two? You aren't normally like this." Hoseok says, coming down to a crouch in front of the mirrors.
"Nothing, we'll do better. Don't worry." You brush off the entire question with your quick response. Jungkook looks at you, his hands on his hips, lightly frowning at how much you're distancing yourself even though he knows its entirely his fault for running from his feelings and not being honest with you.
"Okay, let's do it from the top." The music starts, you getting into the piece without making any eye contact with Jungkook. Even the steps that cause you to be close and near Jungkook, you look anywhere but his eyes, and your touch is light, trying your hardest not to let any feelings pass through the motion. Hoseok is a little more pleased this time around, but it still doesn't sit right with him, so he lets you two take a break while he heads to the other studio to check on Jimin and the rest of the group.
"Hey. Are you okay?"
"Jungkook, you don't get to ask me that." He sighs and runs his hand through his hair, not sure if he should continue on or not.
"Save it, and let's just get this over with, okay? I don't wanna be here just as much as you." Your words cut him deep because dear, you have gotten him completely misunderstood and yet, he still can't speak. He still can't talk about his feelings. He still can't save this even though he wants to, even though he loathes seeing you the way you are with Kang.
"I never said—"
"Kay, ready? Let's run this full out and make it a good one so we can call it for today." Hoseok says, clapping his hands to hype you two up somehow. The music starts and you're finally able to get into the steps. The emotions. And god, it's only because you're so hurt by your own bestfriend. You're hurt that he fucked you so good, and then dipped. You're hurt that he couldn't even face you the day after. You're hurt that after all this time, he made it seem like you still didn't matter enough - at least enough for an explanation, for some kind of reasoning, conversation, behind what just went down between the both of you. Between what has been going down between the both of you.
Besides the stupid ass responses he gave you through text.
You get so into your feelings that you don't even realize you're tearing up by the time the piece is over, and Jungkook catches it even though you face away from him as soon as the music cuts out.
"Nice, okay! That was so much better! Let's pick it up next session, yeah? We'll keep cleaning it up. Thanks guys!" Hoseok says. You immediately head towards the wall, grabbing your things to avoid any confrontation from Jungkook, but he grabs your arm as soon as you slip through the door.
"Y/N, wait. Stop."
"Let me go." You yank your arm from his grip.
"Why are you crying?" He stops in front of you, his hands placed on your arms to prevent you from moving any further.
"I'm not." You blatantly lie while you aggressively wipe away the stragglers coming down.
"Really? Just gonna lie like that?"
"Why do you care? You haven't said shit to me all week." You snap back, and Jungkook is taken aback from the tone in your voice. You remove his hands from your arms, and take one last look at him before shaking your head and walking off.
Next mistake? He doesn't come after you.
This was a waste of fucking time. If he truly cared about you, he wouldn't let you hurt like this.
You let out a deep sigh before clutching onto your things and walking back to your dorm. The walk from the gym/fitness center was damn near on the other end of campus compared to your dorm. It would be a good 10 minute walk if you really took your time. A good 10 minutes to ponder on your thoughts.
Yes, you liked Jungkook. You really liked him. Having sex with him solidified those feelings even more. How could you not have feelings for your bestfriend after all the moments you've shared? Was it your fault for assuming that? Was it your fault for walking through that door when it seemed to be completely open for you?
"Sup." Kang comes out of nowhere, pulling you out of your thoughts. He swings his arm around your shoulder, gently pulling you closer to his body.  "Just got out of practice?"
"Sure did." You give him a toothless smile. Yes, he was attractive as hell. He always will be. But, even with the time you spent together, the date he took you on, he still couldn't make you feel the way Jungkook has been able to make you feel.
"How was it?"
"Um, it was alright. Nothing new really, just cleaning up the piece before the show. You're going right?"
"Why wouldn't I?" He smiles down at you. "Listen, I don't know if you've heard, but there's another party tonight."
"A party? It's Wednesday." You snort.
"Yeah, I mean, one of the boys on the Lacrosse team is throwing it at his family house because his parents will be gone. Wanna come? I'll pick you up. We don't have to stay for long." You looked at your watch.
"What time is it at?"
"Like 9ish?" Enough time for you to shower and get a quick dinner in your belly. Why the hell not? You were caught up for the week. You didn't have any pressing assignments that were due asap.
"Sure. I'll come."
"Cool. See you later then?" He says, about to part ways with you. You simply give him a nod before walking deeper into Edgehill village. You hoped you wouldn't regret this tonight, and you really hoped he meant it when he said you two didn't have to stay for long. You drag yourself into your room, seeing Kass' door wide open, revealing her packing up her duffle bag.
"Hey, where are you headed during the middle of the week?"
"My two classes got cancelled for tomorrow so me and Jiminie are heading out for a mini getaway for our anniversary." You cross your arms and smile. "He's just gonna catch up on shit when we get back I guess." She laughs.
"That sounds cute. I hope you have loads of fun this weekend, babe."
"What are you gonna do?" Kass and Jimin were obviously aware of everything happening between you and Jungkook being that they had to be the ones to take you home. They never pressed on it though, knowing you both were still pretty upset about how things were playing out. They figured you two would eventually work it out, but until then, they would just sit back and keep their mouths shut. You two were being completely stubborn, but it wasn't their relationship to fix.
"Well, there's this party Kang wants to take me to tonight."
"The Lacrosse party? Messy." She laughs. "Be careful, but also have fun, yeah? I still don’t know if I trust him.”
"Yeah I know."
"Tell me how it goes!"
"I will." You wave her off as you head into your room and shut the door. You figured you would just grab dinner on campus to avoid spending more money than you should; after all, dinner seemed to be pretty bomb tonight. You didn't mind going alone, sometimes Namjoon would join you, asking for you to bring him a plate of food while he does the hard job of sneaking inside the cafeteria through the back door. He usually waits for you at a free table and ends up staying there to have dinner with you, updating you on how life has been, how school has been. Sometimes Hoseok would join you, too. Either way, you didn't mind if no one joined. It was nice to have dinner by yourself from time to time.
You get there on time to be able to grab some food, eat quietly and head out before the cafeteria gets way too busy for your liking. You slip into the shower and throw on a mini skirt, a crop top and a denim jacket, lightly fluffing your hair in the mirror and adding a dab of lip gloss to your lips before Kang is calling you to tell you he's outside your dorm. He's wearing something similar to your color palette, however, you don't make much out of it since this also wasn't really an exclusive thing and you sure as hell weren't going around telling people you and Kang had a thing going on.
To him, you two might be a thing. You've definitely overheard people talking about you two in passing.
To you though, you two definitely weren't. And it was a big fuck you to Jungkook for that.
The house is packed from end to end already, and you're surprised being that it has barely hit 10 minutes since the party was expected to take off. Kang is having to park down the hill, allowing you to hop onto his back for a quick piggy back ride up until you reach the front of the house. There's people already fucked up out on the lawn [you figured they fucked themselves over during their pre-game session cause that shit really happens from time to time], either laying there drunkily or yacking on a free patch of grass.
Messy, indeed.
Some people are posted, smoking blunts and offering it to people who were passing by. You and Kang both pass up on it, the idea of not knowing where it has been not sitting right with you. You both head straight to the bottles, taking shots and downing mixed drinks to chase it with so that you can catch up with majority of the crowd. Kang has his arm around your shoulder throughout the night, keeping you close to him, even when he's getting pretty drunk. You realize he's a little more handsy than usual, a little more touchy than you expected him to be. It doesn't bother you for a minute, until he really tries to hike up your skirt while you sit on his lap. You gently shoo his hand away, playing it off while he nuzzles his head against your neck.
"Let's go upstairs, babe." He says, the pet name sounding incredibly off coming from him. Maybe you were drunk, maybe you really just weren't in the mood. It just didn't sound cute, if that even makes sense?
"Okay." You respond stupidly, not wanting to cause a scene at a lacrosse party. You intertwine your fingers with his as he leads the way up the stairs, eyeing the doors as they come into view. He leans forward towards each door, making sure it's clear before opening it. You assume he finally finds one that he's satisfied with when you catch the small smirk that grows at the corner of his lips when he turns the door knob and brings you inside. He pulls you into a deep, rough kiss, one that doesn't even allow you to breathe and process what the fuck is even going on. You can't get into it for the life of you, no matter how hard you try to back away. "Wait, wait."
"What's wrong, baby? Isn't this what you wanted?" He says, kissing down your neck as he drops his jacket to the floor. He gently pushes you onto the bed, his hands traveling up your skirt as you lay there trying to push him off.
"Wait, stop." He doesn't listen. He continues until his hands are literally hooking onto your panties, his finger swiping down your clothed folds. You try fighting him off, but he's way stronger than you. He continues to be aggressive, forcefully trying to shove your panties down until you muster up all the energy you have to finally push him off of you completely. "Stop!"
"What the fuck? I thought you wanted this?"
"Who the hell said that?"
"Are you serious? The way that you're dressed and the way that you look at me. The way you approached me at your friend's party - isn't it all because of this? Because you wanted me? Why are you backing out now?"
"Jesus, get over yourself." You stand, fixing your skirt back down. He furrows his brows at you before his hand grips your arm tightly, shoving you against the wall.
"The fuck, you can't just leave without giving me anything. I brought you here to this party."
"Let me go! You're fucking sick. No one even told you I wanted this to go down. I don't know who you think you are, but you need to get yourself together and stop assuming every pussy is yours to take." He attempts to pin you, his hand holding up both of your hands against the wall while the other tries to pull up your skirt. Someone accidentally opens the door, distracting him and giving you leverage to shove him off and get the fuck away. You dart down the steps, fixing your skirt as you head outside and away from the house.
Fuck, you're far from campus. And Kass and Jimin aren't around.
You groan and run your hand through your hair as you continue to walk down the hill and into the neighborhood to get as far away as possible from that house and that gross ass dude. He was literally just like the rest of the basketball team. You've heard stories and they weren't nice. Looks like he was trained well already, and that shit was sad. What a waste. A beautiful human being with such a nasty, sick mindset. You hoped other girls hadn't fallen for his shit.
Ugh, it sends shivers down your spine. Bad shivers.
"Hello? Y/N?"
"Kook, can you come pick me up please?"
"Yeah, yeah. Of course. Where are you?"
"I'll drop my location. Please hurry." You say, looking back to make sure your coast was clear. You drop the pin into your text thread with Jungkook and sit on the curb until his arrival. It's getting pretty chilly out, and the denim jacket you're wearing fails to provide you with the warmth you're looking for. Sooner or later, Jungkook is pulling up, damn near hopping out before he can shift the gear into park.
"You okay? What happened?" He says, opening the door for you before rushing over to the driver's seat.
"Nothing, can we just go back to your place?" He nods silently, and doesn't press any further after hearing your tone. He watches from his peripherals how you fiddle with your fingers and constantly reach to pull your skirt down even though he doesn't think there's any other way you could pull it down even more. He watches as he parks the car on the curb in front of his apartment how you simply undo your seatbelt and hop out to walk straight into his apartment. He watches as you welcome yourself into his closet and pick out some clothes for you to change in.
You were hurt, and his blood boils thinking about who could've done this and what they could have possibly done.
I mean, no. He knows who did this, but the question was what exactly did he try?
He hears the shower turn on, then quickly get turned off after a good 5 minutes. You had stepped in for a quick body shower, using Jungkook's bodywash just to rid yourself of feeling gross. Feeling gross from being shoulder to shoulder all night long, people breathing down your neck. Kang touching you inappropriately. You slip into Jungkook's clothes, his scent wrapping around you entirely. When you head back into the room, Jungkook has his headset back on as he faces his computer, logging back onto his game of League of Legends. You silently toss your dirty clothes to the side of his room, making a mental note to grab it tomorrow morning and toss it straight into the laundry.
Straight into a fire, perhaps. But you loved those clothes so much, it was unfortunate it'd have such a horrible memory to go with it.
Jungkook slowly removes his headset again and removes himself from his game before he heads over and sits on the edge of his bed. You simply look at him, pursing your lips tightly together to prevent yourself from crying.
But he can tell.
"What happened Y/N?" The question triggers you, making you cry into your hands as he sits there, dumbfounded and worried at how he can fix this and make you feel better. "Look, you don't have to tell me all the details but please tell me how I can help. At least tell me if I need to beat Kang's ass." He says, pulling you into his arms.
"He tried to fucking take advantage of me." You mumble as you remove your face from your hands.
"He did what?" He manages to ask even though he has a hard time swallowing the lump that formed in his throat. He already assumed you had placed him in the same category as Kang even though he never intended to take advantage of you. He really took that night as something special [even drunk], and he never meant to make you feel like you were a used object. Not like Kang.
"He-he," You sniffed. "He tried to force me into having sex with him. He took me upstairs at that lacrosse guy's party or whoever the hell it even was, and he started to aggressively kiss me. And then he tried to force my panties down and touch me there, and—"
"Okay, please don't go on or else I'll literally go over there and tear his ass apart right now. I promise you." He says sternly, his jaw clenching tightly. "God, fuck. I'm so sorry Y/N. I can't apologize on his behalf but fuck, you didn't deserve that." He uses his sweater to wipe your tears.
"I don't even know why I'm crying, this shit isn't even worth it." You groaned. "It's just overwhelming to process, I guess."
"That's okay." He says, letting out a sigh as he brushes his hand through your hair and continues to wipe the stragglers falling from your eyes. "Anything I can get you right now?"
"No, I'm probably just gonna go to bed." He nods. "Thank you for picking me up."
"Of course. You know I'll always be there." He says. You slip yourself into his sheets, watching as he makes his way back to his desk. But fuck, the only thing you needed right now was him. You didn't want this distance anymore, and you just wanted to be comforted in true Jungkook fashion.
"Hm?" He hums as he has a hand placed on the  head of his chair while he turns to you.
"Can you just lay with me?"
"Yeah." He says, shutting off his computer before making his way over to you in the dark. You feel him slip in next to you, his arm snaking around your shoulders so he can pull you close and onto his chest. "Better?"
"Yeah." You say, shutting your eyes as you listen to his heart beat.
"I never meant to take advantage of you, or make you feel like I used you that one night." Silence. "It was dumb of me, but I just— I had trouble coming to terms with my feelings. I was scared that you wouldn't feel the same way, but I thought fuck it, at least you would know, right?"
"What are you talking about, Kook?" You ask, close to a whisper.
"I'm saying that I really fucking like you, Y/N. No, that's not right." He curses himself. "I-I uh, I'm in love with you. And I don't know if I messed this up already with the way I acted, god I hope not, but you at least deserve to know that I truly do value you and that you mean alot to me. That night, even though we were pretty plastered, it meant a lot to me. It was more than just sex and I'm sure you felt that too." He waits for your response as his fingers rake through your hair. "Please say something, anything."
"I feel the same way, Jungkook. You're an idiot for running off, but I couldn't even stay mad at you. You just know how to hit my soft spots and I can never say no to it. Can never turn my back on it." He presses a kiss against the top of your head.
"Fuck, I'm really glad to hear that cause I don't know what I would have done besides cry if you rejected me." You playfully hit his chest.
"You're annoying." You jokingly say as you chuckle.
"I'm sorry. I really am. I never wanted to hurt you."
"It's okay." You look up to press your lips against his before laying back down.
"And Kang better be fucking glad you're pressed against my body right now because I'm still looking to beat his ass."
"He's not even worth it." Is the last thing you say before you find yourself drifting into a deep sleep, in the comfort of Jungkook's arms.
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"You two feeling okay? Nervous?" You and Jungkook shake your heads. "Good, you guys got this. You've been looking amazing during practice, the audience will love you two, no doubt. Just remember to show emotions through expressions and hit every beat sharply." Hoseok nods in unison with the both of you.
"Got it, thanks Hobi." You smile at him toothlessly. You and Jungkook patiently waited for your turn backstage, the talent show already off to a wild and fun start. So many students came by to showcase their talents - from beatboxing, open mic, freestyling [like Yoongi did], dancing, singing, you name it. It was always a fun time at the talent show, and it was always nice to see people getting love for the shit they loved to do.
"You're up next." Hoseok says. "I'll be in the front row. Kick ass and have fun!" He says as he rushes off towards the opposite end to head back out to his seat in the theater.
"Ready?" Jungkook holds out his hand for you to take.
"I think so." You playfully respond as the backstage crew is rushing out the previous talent and rushing you two in to take your places on stage. The lights pick up as soon as the music starts, Kang's big ass head already in full view for you. He's definitely not smiling, no, he has a look of pure disgust because he simply couldn't get what he wanted from you.
And boy, who's fault was that? Not yours, no sir. It was his fault for thinking he had it like that.
But anyways, you're feeling the music, you're feeling the piece because you're dancing with your bestfriend and there wasn't this grey area anymore. It was easier to get into the motions, to get into the feeling, especially when things felt right between the two of you.
And God, what else is more attractive than Jeon Jungkook hitting his 8 counts so smoothly, with just enough umph to make it pop but make it pop cleanly.
Yo, please. I beg. Send some help. You could literally melt on stage.
The moments where Jungkook has to be close to you, where he has to touch you - you let him, and you touch him with meaning. You don't stray away this time because you have no reason to. The crowd is cheering, lots of 'ou's' and 'aw's' erupting from various places in the theater.
"Pretty lady." Jungkook whispers in your ear as the move requires his hands to be placed on your hips for a quick moment. You hear him slightly singing along to the song as he parts from you, causing you to blush.
Sooner or later, the couple piece is over and the song is transitioning to Jimin's piece, you and Jungkook rushing off the stage so the next group can take their positions. Jimin wanted to test his limits, creating a piece a little different than his usual taste - Chris Brown's Came to Do begins blaring through the theater speakers. You immediately jump into Jungkook's arms once you both reach backstage, the both of you immensely happy and pumped that you got through the piece without messing up one step or beat. It went so smoothly that Hoseok was standing in the front row, clapping and cheering in typical Hoseok fashion. You intertwine your fingers with his, slipping through the side door to catch Jimin's piece on stage. You and Jungkook are cheering them on, always impressed by the shit your friends can come up with. You both loved dancing, but you couldn't even imagine coming up with your own pieces to teach people.
That night after the show, everyone heads to a nearby restaurant for dinner with everyone. You all take up almost an entire section of the restaurant, splitting two long tables to accommodate the entire group with doubled the waitresses to take your orders. You settle for water, splitting an abnormally huge and filled deep dish pizza with Jimin, Kass and Jungkook. It was a good day, a good night, everyone at the table happily eating and chatting it up over dinner. You turn down any drinks because to be honest, drinks lowkey make you queasy just from the thought of how much you drank at Jungkook's apartment, plus the added bonus of that party Kang took you to. Jungkook declines as well, knowing he has to drive you back safely.
Jimin and Kass head back to the apartment because Yoongi says he's gonna hang out with Joon And Hoseok for a bit, and they warn you and Jungkook that things may get loud so the both of you decide to really stick to the plan of bringing you back to the dorm. Jungkook does his usual routine of dropping you off first before finding parking around campus. You hop in the shower and come out in Jungkook's oversized crewneck that he left in your closet, forgoing the shorts because you certainly thing that at this point, he'd love to see you in his sweater and panties.
And he does. He smiles as he pulls you close, his hands traveling up your sweater, only to find out that you literally don't have shit on besides some cute little boyshorts. He feels himself hardening in his pants quick because he's incredibly attracted to you and everything about you, always has been, always will be.
"You did amazing tonight." He says, gently kissing your forehead.
"You did too, partner." He gives you a slightly shocked look.
"Is that all I am to you? Your dance partner?"
"Yeah, why? Were you expecting more?" You joke as you smile up at him.
"Yeah, I was."
"Oh?" He gently swoops you up into his arms, your legs wrapped tightly around his torso as he sits you on the bed, his hands resting on your thighs while you continued to hold him around the neck. "Care to tell me what you were expecting?"
"Well, you know, my best friend—" He presses a kiss against your lips, thumbs gently rubbing circles against your hips. "My girlfriend."
"Hm, say that again?" Your fingers are gently playing with the ends of his hair, your lips barely grazing his.
"My girlfriend." He says closed to a whisper, kissing you softly. The kiss deepens quick, Jungkook's tongue lining your bottom lip as his way of asking for permission to take it further. You gladly take it and let him in, your tongues instantly fighting for dominance. Your fingers travel up his hair, tugging ever so slightly just to let him know you want more. That you need more.
And he gets that.
His fingers hook onto the band of your boyshorts, tugging them down and letting them fall down your legs and onto the floor. He breaks the kiss momentarily, his brown, puppy dog eyes looking straight into yours.
"Hey." He says, brushing the hair out of your face.
"I know I said the last time was special, and it was. It is." He corrects himself. "But, I wanna do right by you this time around. So, is it okay if I keep going? Are you comfortable?" He asks properly, since the two of you are both sober and perfectly coherent, aware of your surroundings and the fact that you'll be seeing each other fully naked in a few minutes.
"Yes." You respond. "Yes, I want you to keep going. I want you. This." He simply nods, bringing his lips back onto yours. His hands climb up your sweater and gently gives your breasts a good squeeze, earning a small moan from the both of you. His other hand begins to travel down to your pussy, two long fingers slowly probing your entrance and causing your breathing to hitch.
"You okay?" He asks lowly. You nod, biting onto your bottom lip as you tilt your head back and rest on your hands, no longer able to keep up with the kiss due to all the pleasure starting to pile up deep in your core. Jungkook starts of slow, his head now buried into the crook of your neck as he works his digits upward, tickling at the right spot.
"Ohhhh, Kook." You mewl as his tongue swipes across the surface of your neck, biting gently beneath your jaw. He begins to pick up the pace, the sounds of him finger fucking you filling up the room entirely.
"Fuck, you're so wet baby." He groans into your neck.
"I'm gonna cum." You whine, teeth almost piercing through your bottom lip in between your whimpers.
"Need to taste you." He removes his fingers and sinks down in between your thighs, gripping onto them and pulling you just a teensy bit more off the edge of the bed so he can get a good angle. The sight of his eyes looking up at you in between your legs is to die for, and the sight alone is enough to make you cum. But, you hold on, you ride out for a little longer - feeling Jungkook's tongue swipe in and out of your folds before he's sucking endlessly on your clit.
"Ahhh, fuck, wait, Jungkook!" He slightly smiles while eating you out, signaling that he's not stopping even if you beg him to. "Hnnng—shit!" You moan loudly as you feel yourself toppling over the edge, your body shaking in Jungkook's grip. You twitch every time he continues to suck gently on your sensitive nub, letting you ride out the rest of your high. He comes back up to your lips, the taste of your own cum lingering on it as you kiss him deeply.
"You taste so good." He says, back to twirling your nipples in between his fingers.
"Wanna feel you." You fiddle with his jeans, undoing his belt and sliding the rest down as much as you could. Jungkook gets out of his shirt and tosses it aside before helping get the sweater above your head. His eyes glow at the sight of your bare body in front of him, wanting to do nothing but please you and please you well.
"God, you're so perfect." He places kisses down your collarbone, to the surface of your breasts before quickly swirling his tongue around your perked buds. You moan as you tug down onto his boxer briefs, immediately stroking his hardened member while he tended to you. Jungkook was a fucking beauty himself - his soft hair, his perfectly toned body, his long 'thick in all the right places' dick.
"Please." You plead. "I want you inside of me." You whimper, causing Jungkook's breathing to hitch when you slightly tighten your grip at the base of his shaft. He gently pushes your hand aside to take over, lining himself up at your entrance. He inserts the tip, watching your eyes roll to the back of the head as he slowly sinks into you.
"Mmmmmgod." He moans. "So tight for me, baby. So fucking wet and tight." He repeats, close to a growl. Your moaning begins to pick up, matching the pace of his thrusting. You're still on the edge of the bed, Jungkook keeping you steady by gripping your thighs tightly. He marvels at the sight of your titties bouncing up and down with every thrust, hissing and shutting his eyes momentarily to keep himself grounded and to prevent himself from coming too quickly. Cause god, he can literally blow any second now.
"Jungggggkooook, yessssss!" You moan loudly, whining even at this point with how good he feels fucking into you at such a fast pace. You're feeling slightly sore already from him hammering into you, but nonetheless, it builds more pleasure for you and you want nothing but to reach your high again. "I-I'm coming!" Jungkook moans in unison with you when he feels your walls pulsating against his cock.
"Such a good girl for me." He says, slowing his pace. The creamy sounds of Jungkook's cock slipping inside and out is music to the both of your ears. He finally gains the courage to remove himself, sitting next to your spot on the edge of the bed and pulling you onto his lap. You swing a leg over, your hands resting on the nape of his neck while you sink yourself lower onto his length. Your mouth opens to let out a moan, but the best you can do is let out a hiss. It feels too fucking good that you can't even process it thoroughly. Jungkook pushes your lips down onto his by grabbing your neck, his other hand guiding the movement of your hips as you roll into him.
"Mmmggg—Jungkook." You whimper in between kisses. "You feel so fucking good, god. You're gonna make me cum again."
"Yeah, cum for me. Cum all over me. It's yours." He grunts, his hands guiding you to work him faster. Your movements are getting sloppier, and you feel your wetness starting to coat his pelvis. He doesn't give a fuck though, and neither do you. This shit feels too good for you to worry about the mess you're making on him.
"Cum with me please." He moans at the sound of you whispering into his ear.
"Faster, baby." He says, almost making you cry at how awfully close you are to unraveling. You tug onto his hair, your head buried deep into his neck as you try and suck onto the surface, trying to find an outlet, some kind of release, until you let go. You suck harshly as you coat his cock with your cum, leaving a purple mark right at the base of his neck. You continue to ride out your high, rolling your hips sloppily as Jungkook finally lets himself go, his moan bouncing off of your walls as his seed fills you up warmly.
You stay in your position, slowly raising your head to cup his cheeks and kiss him deeply once more.
"Fuck, I love you." He says slightly pulling away.
"I love you too." You giggle.
"Didn't actually need any drinks to do this now, did we?" Jungkook jokes, softly pinching your hip.
"Shut up."
"Damn, you both couldn't even at least try to be quiet?!" Jimin yells from outside the door.
925 notes · View notes
satnin-darling · 6 days ago
Kismet. (m) | ONE SHOT | Jeon Jungkook, 14.2k
Pairing(s): Jungkook x Reader
Summary: In this life, you get to choose what to believe in, be it fate or chance. But little did you know that some people above are messing with you, in the most non- prearranged way possible. Enter Jimin, who works for the department of Fate, with his unlikely colleague, Taehyung, who works the department of Chance. They quarrel to no end, pulling at the strings that hold up the universe to fashion something that resembles destiny or coincidence. As a result, you and Jungkook end up being mere puppets to their ploy, which begs the question: is it fate or coincidence?
Warnings/Tags: RATED M (18+); for language, smut (fem-reader; penetrative sex; (lazy) doggy - lol; multiple orgasms); fantasy!AU; crack?; Vmin are bickering soulmates; switches from your POV, Jimin’s POV, Jungkook’s POV, and Taehyung’s POV; you and Jungkook are literally obsessed with each other from the get-go, and you feel the same way about each other's thighs lmao; there are a bunch of terms that I've thrown in that is relevant to this universe; moments of fluff; non-idol!AU - fantasy!AU + strangers to lovers
The department of Fate was busy at the start of the day with its advocates stationed at their mahogany desks, their heads down, their eyes open for any complications in the pursuit of destiny. Park Jimin, a Fate Advocate, settles on his desk, the monitor primed for surveillance at his first client of the day. He straightens his tie and badge; inspections were happening later on and he wanted to make a good impression.
On the screen was an overhead view of a café in the city, the focus on a table by the window, with his client, a girl, looking out onto the traffic. She had a latte to warm her hands, her sweet disposition completed by a light, floral dress. Jimin checked her chart:
Assigned Department: Fate.
Overview of their agenda:
Daily morning coffee;
brunch with friend, Jung Hoseok;
*bump into a stranger, i.e., Jeon Jungkook;
after work drinks; and
*second meeting with Jeon Jungkook
General arc:
Meets their significant other through charity dinner.
Gets married following two years of engagement.
Children are expected, though the number will be subject to review.
Work life is satisfactory, if not excellent.
No major issues regarding finances.
Lifelong proponent for electric cars.
(*) This may be a spontaneous deviation from the client’s branch of fate - it is advisable that their designated advocate rectify this as soon as possible.
Jimin narrowed his eyes at the glaring asterisks. While her general arc appeared to be straight and narrow, those could disturb the series of events and develop into a something catastrophic. Simply that his client could be led astray, throwing her whole arc into an irretrievable karmic rubble. Nearly all of his clients adhered to their destiny, his job was to see to that. But this one plagued him. It was timely that he had this case on the day of inspections and he had to shine to get promoted. The perks were enough to motivate him since he wanted his own office and personal assistant. Oh, and once he was there, he would be the recipient of a fresh cup of coffee from the barista with a special artisan blend each morning. He reviewed the statistics, he checked that the graphs of fate were relatively malleable, then he looked at his monitor. He found that she was still finishing her latte, taking slow sips to savour the taste.
At that, he knew that he had time before the first asterisk may occur. He scanned the chart once more and found the name that he never wanted to come across on any of his work: VANTE. It was accompanied by a painted face, the thick brush strokes dripping down, messing up the pristine presentation of the data. Jimin sighed, He always was a show-off. All he wanted was a straightforward case and the satisfaction of a happy client. With that in mind, he decided to make his way over to the place that he loathed to visit.
The department of Chance was found within the eye of a hurricane. It was located far, far away from the department of Fate. As it should, given the chaos it administered to its clients. Jimin approached it with caution, the principles of coincidence and plausibility spurred the cyclone, its grey spirals undulating, snapping like whips. He waited as an opening appeared, stepping in while trying to make himself as small as possible. The chill that wrapped around him seeped through his suit; the sound of his footsteps absorbed by the pitted floor.
At the end of the tunnel, he emerged into an open space of disorganised bustle. While his department smells of freesias, here smelled of a confectionary store. He recognised the scent of taffy, which was light enough to appreciate. Chance advocates were more relaxed, their temperaments changing like the wind. Jimin couldn’t help but turn his nose up at the disorder. Lines were meant to be adhered to, fate is all about predetermined maps and his clients were the better for it.
The person of interest stuck out like a sore thumb, with his loose slacks and signature slides. He swanned about the space; his sunglasses were placed so they were facing the back of his head instead of shielding his eyes. His black mop of hair was unruly, his smile wide and devious. Jimin made his way to him, counting down the seconds in which he would be back by his desk.
“Kim Taehyung, I need to speak to you.”
The dark strands of hair were disturbed by the turn of Taehyung’s head, a slow smile spreading across his lips. Jimin tapped his foot, waiting to be guided to a more private area to talk.
“Go on,” Taehyung said, taking out a small tablet at the same time.
“Can we go to your office?” He asked, looking around at the buzz of Chance advocates, some with headsets on while others didn’t seem to be working at all. He saw several ping-pong games happening in the vicinity.
“You’re in it,” Taehyung replied.
If Jimin had high blood pressure, it would have skyrocketed in that moment. He reached into the pocket of his suit to retrieve a copy of his client’s chart. Taehyung was tapping on the screen, watching an overhead surveillance, dragging an icon that read ‘Opportunity #1.’ It bounced till it got absorbed by the client and Jimin watched as they suddenly bumped into another person, their coffee spilling onto their clothes.
“You just cost them so much time, not to mention money for the shirts,” Jimin said, watching as the collision led to apologies and frantic wipes to their clothes. Taehyung shrugged, exiting the tab. He drew away only to sit on a giant, red beanbag. He motioned for Jimin to follow him; his lean figure suddenly swamped in the red material as he crossed his legs.
“I won’t be here that long, and I don’t want to wrinkle my suit,” Jimin said, hovering over him.
“Why are you so dressed up anyway?” Taehyung drawled, waiting for Jimin to sit.
“Why didn’t you wear a better outfit?” Jimin quipped. Taehyung let the comment go over his head and swept his arm over a space beanbag.
“Sit. C’mon.”
Looking around, Jimin realised that there weren’t exactly signposts to more private offices, that Taehyung was telling the truth about working in a communal space. He sank onto a light blue beanbag, feeling strange as it felt like it resisted against his weight. Taehyung was back on his tablet, his fingers working fast, tapping then sliding, deploying coincidences to those who were none the wiser.
“I’m here for my client,” Jimin said, taking Taehyung’s attention.
“Okay, who?”
Taehyung removed his sunglasses from their initial position and slid them on, his gaze hidden behind dark tinted lenses. Jimin unfolded the chart, pointing to the illustration, Taehyung’s mark.
“What’s the meaning of this?”
Taehyung tilted his head, donning on the pretence of ignorance. The sunglasses made it more irritating. Jimin waited, his eyes on the slight curve of Taehyung’s smile.
“It’s a post-modern piece of artwork. I think it really adds to the plainness of your chart, don’t you agree?”
Jimin exhaled sharply, flipping the page to reveal the highlighted asterisks. Time was of the essence, Jimin could sense that Jung Hoseok was already arranging an impromptu brunch.
“I don’t like you messing with my client,” Jimin explained, stretching his patience out. Taehyung pouted, unlocking his tablet.
“But I’m not messing with her, I’m simply re-routing her for a better, brighter life. The guys that she’s been dating are so… boring. Oh, and she deserves a good fuck and to not fake any of her orgasms. The guy you have lined up for her makes me want to sleep - she would have eventually divorced him,” he reasoned, shoving the tablet so that it covered the chart. Jimin stared at him, astounded. There was no such thing as divorce on her chart at all. Taehyung looked at him with condescension.
“If you didn’t let me butt in at this stage, I would have later. And that’s worse because she’ll be committed with a joint account and a mortgage. Possibly with kids too,” he explained. Jimin closed his eyes, he could feel his pulse thudding forcefully within the network of his veins.
“My client’s general arc is perfectly suited to her destiny. She’s sweet and her fortune reflects that. Stop interfering!” He said, his voice rising slightly. Taehyung sighed, tapping on a folder that read ‘Jeon Jungkook: Work in Progress’ Jimin adjusted himself on the beanbag, smoothing his suit in exasperation.
“Look - this guy has been through it. I wouldn’t have ‘interfered’ if he wasn’t good for her,” Taehyung said, cycling through the numerous sub-folders and eventually landing on a file that read ‘Livestream.’
When the window popped out there was a hazy picture of a bedroom. There were posters on the wall, some of which were hanging off, their dog-eared corners torn or folded. On the floor was a trail of clothing, by the desk were a tangle of cables, an open laptop, headphones, and Jimin could see the beginnings of a drum kit cropped out by the vantage point. His eyes swept along until they settled on a bed with a figure underneath the sheets. It slumbered, a dark head of hair peeking out, his face pressed on the pillow, mouth half open as he laid on his front. Jimin made a face.
“Okay… okay, we caught him at a bad time, but later on, when that chance meeting happens, it would be electric, trust me,” Taehyung said, pushing the sunglasses so that it rested atop his head, containing the mop of hair, and exposing his forehead. Jimin saw the time on the top right corner, it was creeping up to brunch, which meant that Jung Hoseok had probably sent his client a text.
“I haven’t forgotten about last time,” Jimin said, exiting the window so he could glance at Jungkook’s profile. Taehyung gave him a close-lipped smile, which Jimin forced himself to assume that it was apologetic rather than cheeky.
“I get it, I’m sorry, I thought that they would be perfect for each other,” Taehyung said.
“You didn’t even consult me at all. So, they ended up not getting what they wanted in the end,” Jimin replied, recalling his earlier client, Kim Namjoon. He was a promising scholar at the time of Taehyung’s intervention. His general arc was like his current client’s so Taehyung took it upon himself to pepper his chart with is self-proclaimed coincidences. Kim Namjoon ended up becoming so enamoured that he lost all semblance of rationality, at the extremes, dropping out of school to follow her abroad. In the end, she left him for another, so he was a sitting duck, returning to nothing when he eventually made enough to leave. Jimin managed to assert some balance to his fate and now Kim Namjoon is an English Teacher in a small fishing village. He may not be happy, but he was content.
Jimin didn’t like bringing it up since it was an example of how things could go so wrong with even minimal interference; but he used it to remind himself that he should nip certain things in the bud. Even more reason to when Taehyung was involved. Jimin glanced at him, his brows knitting at the memory. He was young, fresh out of Fate advocate school. Yet while he was the top of his class in theory, he was at the bottom of the ladder in practice. Meanwhile, Taehyung had already gained the reputation of a trickster and was able to blindside the new Fate advocates in a blink of an eye. Jimin got an earful from his superiors following that incident.
Taehyung pressed his lips into a line, the apples of his cheeks appearing rounder. Then he bared his teeth, sucking in air.
“Isn’t that what it’s about? Luck, chance, endless possibilities?” He asked, his eyebrows raising in optimism. Jimin ignored him and scrolled through Jeon Jungkook’s index - or lack thereof.
“How am I supposed to navigate his profile?” He asked, sifting through random bookmarks, tabbed pages, links that weren’t updated. Taehyung raised his finger and dragged a slim, rectangular box to appear.
“I have a system. What are you looking for?”
Jimin shifted in his seat, the beanbag seemed to swallow him whole, as if it knew that he didn’t belong here.
“I need to see what kind of person this Jeon Jungkook is, whether he is right for my client - where’s his agenda for today?” He asked, his eyes flitting over the numerous annotations that Taehyung scrawled. His fingers move fast, they fly over the icons that were unfamiliar to Jimin and settled on a virtual post-it. It was green and could be stretched and constricted if you drag it from the corners. Jimin pinched it so that the font was bigger.
Assigned Department: Chance.
Name/Monikers: Jeon Jungkook; Jungkook-ah; Jay-K; Golden Maknae
Jimin turned to Taehyung who was reading the same thing.
“Golden Maknae?”
Taehyung nodded, “He’s good at everything and he’s the youngest amongst his friends.”
Jimin resumed reading, feeling a sense of trepidation with every scroll.
Overview of their agenda:
Jimin's mouth twisted at the use of emoticons. Taehyung pressed it so that it changed from green to purple. He scanned the bullet points, all haphazard.
Wake up late; rush to shower and get ready.
Take the next available subway. Flirt with a passenger across the carriage - options include eye contact, brush of a hand, suggestive lean as the train becomes unstable for about 4.5 seconds (@Advocate’s discretion)
“You know, for someone who appears scatter brained, you have surprisingly detailed notes,” Jimin said, earning a self-satisfied scoff from Taehyung.
Make it into first day of work at the café, albeit 5.2 minutes late. Apologise to the manager using undeniable charm. Note: Give Jungkook the opportunity to hit the ground running by taking a tray of coffee. Could throw in a wink - @Advocate’s discretion.
Jimin rolled his eyes at the set-up of events. Taehyung chuckled as he approved the bullet point after deleting the option of a wink. It becomes bold after his actions.
Jungkook doesn’t see a girl in a floral print dress emerging form the bathroom until it’s too late because he was distracted by a customer spilling their drink. They bump into each other quite abruptly, they look at each other once, they realise that they were meant for each other - ensure to add the sound of bells.
Jimin whipped out his chart and saw that discrepancy in notes. Taehyung laughed nervously, knowing that he purposefully omitted the details he inputted in Jungkook’s chart.
“Isn’t that a bit much?” Jimin asked, noting the phrase ‘meant for each other.’
“No? Not when they are two halves of the same whole,” Taehyung replied, hurrying down until it gets to the final bullet point.
Second meeting: Orchestrated by a distant mutual friend, Min Yoongi. He comes to crash at Jungkook’s place for a couple of days. Worked at a temp job with the girl, got on well together but lost contact. He doesn’t know anyone else in the city and asked to meet. Jungkook tags along after work
The meeting is E-L-E-C-T-R-I-C.
Jimin saw that a lightning bolt was drawn next to the spelled-out word. Taehyung reached over and pressed a code, then clicked on an icon that was an upwards arrow. An audible ‘whoosh’ resounded from the speakers. Jimin shot him a look of suspicion.
“What did you do?” He asked, feeling the beanbag deplete slightly. Taehyung assured him with a smile.
Jimin let it go and clicked on Jungkook’s general arc tab:
General arc: Jeon Jungkook
MOTTO: Rather be dead than live without passion.
Enjoys music - excellent singer and dancer. Could be a performer IF things didn’t work out.
Works a lot of temp jobs. Though he had a fleeting office romance that ended badly - results in phobia of corporations and buildings with more than six floors.
Freelance video editor.
Excellent metabolism can consume up to three cup noodles, spicy or not.
Work ethic is unparalleled whether at work or at the gym or in bed.
10% body fat.
Tatted on his right arm, some designs are still in the works.
He noticed that Taehyung was reading them out loud, sounding proud at the points raised. Jimin turned to him, confused.
“This isn’t a general arc! It’s trivia. Where is his life going to go? When will he settle down? What about retirement plans?” Jimin asked, his heart racing at the chaos that greeted him. Taehyung titled his head, unperturbed.
“Don’t you see? It all depends on this meeting!” He exclaimed, his movements animated, his head shaking in a way that prompted his sunglass to slip down to cover his eyes. Jimin scowled, handing the tablet back to Taehyung.
“I’m leaving, and I don’t want you messing with my client’s fate. I’ll get reinforcements if I have to,” he threatened, getting up from the beanbag with difficulty. He cast a look at the pronounced wrinkles at the elbows and backs of the knees. He sighed, dreading the knowing looks when he did eventually return to the department of Fate.
“It’s too late!” Taehyung laughed, prompting Jimin to spin around, halting him from his tracks.
Taehyung tapped his tablet and Jimin whipped the chart from his inside pocket. He looked down at his client’s chart. His blood goes cold.
Assigned Department: Fate.
Overview of their agenda:
Daily morning coffee;
*bump into a stranger, Jeon Jungkook;
brunch with friend, Jung Hoseok; CANCELLED/RESCHEDULED
after work drinks; and
*second meeting with Jeon Jungkook
Jimin folded the chart with equanimity. He closed his eyes, breathing in and out. When he opened then, Taehyung had stood up from his beanbag, turning the tablet towards Jimin. It took a moment before his eyes focused but the bed was empty, and then the scene cut to Jungkook racing through the streets, weaving between the crowds. Eventually, he springs into the double doors of the café, right where Taehyung wanted him to be.
“I fast tracked it!” He beamed.
But Jimin didn’t match his energy, instead, lunging after him a sudden burst of rage. Taehyung ducks down, bending his body so that it was flew out of Jimin’s grasp. They chase each other, Taehyung hiding behind a spare ping-pong table, making Jimin run in circles till he breaks free, heading towards the corner where there were slides that twisted like snakes.
“Kim Taehyung! Come back here!”
Jungkook was late. He barrelled through the double doors of subway and bounded down the steps. His feet were loud against the concrete sidewalks as he expertly navigated the morning crowds. It was his first day at the café and he wanted to make a good impression. The trouble was that he found it so difficult to wake up before noon. After the cold shower he had, there was barely any time to dry his hair taking to stand underneath the vents in the train so that the air could do the trick of at least drying his roots.
Situated in the heart to the city, the café served as a haven for the employees of the nearby corporations. He figured that he could earn a decent living from a more physical line of work. Besides, it offered him an ideal location for when he was on break. There was a nearby park or other café’s that had live music. There was even a building that was filled with karaoke rooms. He didn’t like desk jobs anymore, the memories attached to them he’d rather blank out. That and his learned aversion towards the copier room. He didn’t appreciate nearly getting his ass photocopied after getting a blow job from a girl that he’d rather erase from his memory.
Once through the automatic doors, he searched for the back room where the employees would normally be prior to starting. Before he could enter, he sees the beady eyes of the manager that interviewed him. He bows deeply.
“I’m so sorry that I’m late!”
There was no response, so he grabbed a nearby tray from an employee, who gave him a look of disapproval. Jungkook’s steady hand ensured that the drinks didn’t topple. His manager cleared her throat, waiting for Jungkook to spring into action.
“Which table is this for?” He asked, hopefully rectifying his growing reputation as a disruptor. He thought about winking but didn’t. Though he really felt like he should have.
His colleague cocks his head towards a nearby table with two teenagers, besotted with each other. Jungkook works straight away, even though he wasn’t dressed in uniform and erupts into a big smile. Too enamoured with each other, he didn’t bother greeting them and set the drinks down in a position where it won’t get knocked over.
As he made his way back, his manager seemed content at his display of bravado. Jungkook saw the door to the back room appear as she side-stepped. Exhaling in relief, he entered the cool space and found a spare locker with his name scrawled on a piece of tape. He shoved is jacket inside, grabbed his name badge and searched for an apron.
“Can we reschedule or bump up our brunch for, let’s say, this evening?”
Hoseok’s voice is clear over the music in the background. You frowned at the news, you really wanted to see him since it had been too long. You had finished drying your hands and looked at yourself in the mirror, fussing over your hair and smoothing your dress.
“I can’t this evening, I have a dinner with a friend,” you replied.
“Oh - who?”
“Min Yoongi. He’s a friend from this temp job I did before my current one. He was an aspiring music producer, I think he’s actually producing now,” you said, remembering your brief conversation when contacted you.
“Ah, really? How about this weekend? My treat, I promise not to bail that time. It’s ‘cause my students have this really important showcase,” he said, you could hear the apology in his voice though you couldn’t help but laugh.
“They’re in pre-school, Hoseok.”
“I know, I know, but it’s really important to support them,” he replied, ending it with a laugh.
“Well, you did do the same for your high school students,” you concede. Hoseok went above and beyond his students, which is why he was a highly sought-after dance teacher in the city. Under his wing, there wasn’t anything that you couldn’t achieve.
“You still owe me for not making it to that one - hey, let me know when we can re-arrange ‘cause I know a place.”
You pushed off from the sink and looked at your reflection once more.
“I will. Talk soon?”
Once you hang up, you make your way outside, thumbing down your phone to double check the details of your dinner with Yoongi. If the time between meeting Hoseok last was long, then the time between meeting Yoongi was eternal. You agreed because you liked his company and you had a mutual hate towards your office manager, who never failed to sneer before speaking.
Yoongi [9:58AM]: We can meet near the old building, next to the hair salon :)
You remembered the nights you spent over soju and barbecue, you being the designated shot filler and he being the person who turned the meat till they were cooked to perfection. You poised your fingers over the keyboard, fashioning a reply. But you didn’t get to because someone rather hefty collided with you, nearly knocking you off your feet if not for his arm curling over your waist for support.
“Ack!” You gasped, feeling the power behind the collision.
Nearby, someone was slamming their hand against the bell at the counter, so the delicate sounds filled the air. To your side were customers fussing over a spilled drink.
You looked up because that was your only choice, and you were met with large, brown eyes, dark hair, and an exposed forehead which drew your attention to a silver eyebrow bar. Below his shapely lips was a distinct mole, which stretched as his mouth parted, still apologising. He was so close. You smell something that resembled fresh fabric softener and now, coffee grounds because you see that he works for the café.
Now, you were acutely aware that his arm was around your waist, the hard muscle keeping you from meeting the floor. His eyes check you, they sweep along your features, you found him as dumbfounded as you were. Something shifts in your mind. A feeling that you couldn’t point a finger to. As if a current was travelled between you. If you paid close attention, your bodies seemed to vibrate from the contact. You wondered if he felt the same. But you quash that and use him to stand up, placing your hands on his (broad and muscular) shoulders, creating distance immediately. He doesn’t let you go until you were back on your own two feet.
“Sorry again, it’s my first day,” he said, smiling at you kindly. You couldn’t help but look at him again, the way he took up space in a way that you couldn’t ignore.
“It’s fine, thank you for saving me from the fate of falling on the floor,” you replied. His smile widens, the sides of his eyes have lines from someone who grinned a lot. It made him look boyish and approachable. The smell of fabric softener and coffee grounds were faint now, you tried to stop from leaning in to not implicate yourself.
“It’s my pleasure. Do you come here often?” He asked, returning your implicit wish to prolong the conversation. You try to answer but you see his hand outstretch towards your face, you back away but not too much.
“Sorry, you had something in your hair,” he said, bringing it up in front of your face to show a petal. You recalled that there were fresh flowers in the bathroom.
“Thanks… uh, yeah, I do. I work around the corner,” you replied, not sure of how much you should divulge.
He nods, you see his name tag: Jeon Jungkook. He nods, it was subtle and measured. There was a pause between you, a beat before it got awkward. He shifts on his feet, so do you. From a brief glance, enough to be harmless, you see his toned thighs, made possible by how tight his black jeans are on him.
Were they part of the uniform?
If you could, you would shake your head. But you couldn’t because that would be strange and uncalled for.
“Ah, so you work in one of those skyscrapers?” He asked, and you nod, feeling like you were suspended in time, do you verbally affirm or nod?
“Yeah, the one with a billboard of that lemon kombucha,” you said, trying to paint a picture of using its most noticeable landmark. Jungkook’s eyes widened, you thought how big they were, like doe eyes and since he was away from the light, they were like black pools. You assumed that he recognised what you were talking about, it wasn’t a building that you could miss.
“I know that building! I love that kombucha, I actually have a stack of boxes at home and they’re really good for - ”
“Jeon Jungkook!”
Behind the counter was his manager, a wiry woman with a stony expression, her palm on a small bell and her hand held a tray with a cup of coffee. Jungkook gave you a smile, the same one that showed that he was embarrassed to be put in place, especially during his first day.
“Sorry - well, you know where to find me, so see you around?”
You weren’t normally fazed. In fact, you thought that you got along fine socially, people didn’t rouse irrational reactions from you, much less at the smallest interactions. But Jungkook was different. The way he looked at you made you feel shy. Perhaps it was how he looked at you, as if he couldn’t tear his gaze away.
“See you!”
It was fine up until you raised your hand to wave. A mistake. Something that would have been cute if you were both drunk. But under the glaring lights of the café, sober, it was mortifying. Jungkook smiled which had an added nose scrunch. You hoped that it wasn’t feigned politeness. When he turned to resume working, you let out the breath you had been collecting in your lungs, looking around to check if anyone else felt the same seismic shift. Everything seemed the same, people were talking, eating, and drinking. You snapped out of it and headed out the door, thinking of killing some time before you went to work.
“This is all your fault.”
Jimin gave up on chasing Taehyung because the department security had taken him up on that offer. What he didn’t anticipate was that he was also part of the round-up given that he was spending far too long at not doing his job. Now, in a holding cell that was all bright, white light then plush, cream sofa’s, he had spent the past hour watching Taehyung’s ‘fast-tracked’ version of events unfold. Though he preferred to turn away and listen in as an alternative. He heard everything, even down to your description of the kombucha advert on your building. All of this made the prospect of promotion slip from his grasp.
“It’s okay, it’s no big deal. Nothing might even happen,” Taehyung replied, opening another video stream of a Pomeranian doing tricks. Jimin let out a long sigh. He seemed to only be doing that in the presence of Taehyung.
“Yes it is a big deal, you could have steered her off her general arc! And besides if it wasn’t a big deal then why are we in a holding cell?” Jimin asked, missing the quiet in the department of Fate. He also missed his desk, his monitor, the customary greetings to his colleagues as they passed by his station. Taehyung pursed his lips, not having a reply for once.
“The one thing that happened was that they met and -”
“Park Jimin from the department of Fate and Kim Taehyung from the department of Chance, please take a number.”
The generic voice carried through the tannoy causing both to jump. Jimin whipped his head for any changes to their environment, there was no such thing.
“Where are we meant to take a number?” He asked, lowering his voice and clutching the arm of the sofa, fearing that the ground might split open suddenly.
Taehyung shrugged, getting up and walking around, sweeping his foot (sans slide) over the floor. He stopped where there was an obvious recess and pressed down. A mechanical hiss occurred as it rose from the ground, inside were two paper tickets; Taehyung received them both. Jimin stayed where he was because he was abruptly overtaken by fear. Not once had he been in this much trouble, he never needed to ‘take a number.’ When Taehyung returned, he presented the paper tickets in his palm. Jimin looked at his.
Ticket for admission to the Courts of Chance/Fate - Civil Division
Defendant: Park Jimin, advocate under the department of Fate.
Charge: Failing to rectify the client’s agenda, thus leading to potential, irreparable changes to the client’s fate.
Punishment: Subject to review from the courts.
Please wait for the mode of transport shortly.
Jimin wanted to disappear but not before killing Taehyung. He turned to him, waving his ticket in the air.
“Do you see this? Is it still not a big deal to you? Let me see yours,” he said, grasping for Taehyung’s ticket, who gave it nonchalantly. The video of Pomeranians was exchanged for someone giving a tutorial on how to cook spam. Jimin compared his ticket to his.
Ticket for admission to the Courts of Chance/Fate - Civil Division
Defendant: Kim Taehyung, advocate under the department of Chance.
Charge: Interfering with their client’s agenda and another client’s agenda to the point where there are potential, irreparable changes to both client’s general arc.
Outstanding charges: minor
Owes approximately six crates of flavoured soju from the communal cafeteria, circa 2018 - present.
Failing to return eco bike following the environment festival, circa 2019.
Placed initials ‘KTH’ on seven ping pong balls every two weeks for a year, circa 2017.
Punishment for current charge: Subject to review from the courts.
Punishment for outstanding charges: Delegated to the defendant’s official legal representatives.
Please wait for the mode of transport shortly.
“Why on ping pong balls?” Jimin asked, setting aside his consternation for his curiosity. Taehyung locked his tablet and shrank it so it could fit in his pocket.
“Those were the balls that were winning points.”
Jimin raised his eyebrows.
“Every two weeks? For a year?”
Taehyung nodded, “I tried not to give up.” Then, he swiped his ticket and scrutinised it more.
“One question: why are we in the civil division?”
Jimin racked his brain, reaching into his memories from advocate school. The Basics of Karmic Law was his favourite class and if he wasn’t an advocate, he would have been a judge.
“Because we breached our duty of care.”
The courts of Chance/Fate weren’t that much different from human courts. Jimin and Taehyung stood before two judges, raised way above eye level, who had little choice but to look down at them. There was the barest outline of a hammer and gavel. Behind them were towering security guards, ready to lunge if ever they try to make a break for it. The entire room was composed of dark woods and burgundy leather. It was hostile and appeared insulated, the slightest noise would be audible. On a small booth, near the judges were their legal representatives, who appeared exhausted, with their sagging skins and sallow complexions. Jimin gulped.
“Park Jimin and Kim Taehyung are in a joint case for being involved with two clients in close proximity to each other,” one of their representatives announced, the one with an aquiline nose. The judges remained stoic, their stares burning holes into Jimin’s suit.
“What do the defendants plead?” One of the judges asked, his voice boomed along the room. Jimin clenched his jaw, looking straight ahead.
“Not guilty,” Taehyung said, causing Jimin’s jaw to loosen. The same judge looked at him, waiting for his plea. Jimin wanted the ground to open to swallow him. There was no chance of a promotion now. He sighs because he knew what he did and didn’t do. All that was left was punishment.
Taehyung made a noise that resembled a scoff and a choke. He moved so that he could stand in front of Jimin, perhaps to shake him from his stupor but the security held him back.
“Excuse me, your honour, he's just a little confused at the moment, he hasn't had any breakfast, they work them too hard over at the department of Fate,” Taehyung reasoned, his arms flapping widely before he was caged by one of the guards.
Although, perhaps that wasn't the best of observations as the judge who represented Fate glared at him. Jimin turned to Taehyung, who struggled under the grip of the burly guards, shooting him daggers with his eyes. Jimin shook his head in disapproval, saying his plea once more.
“I plead guilty.”
Punishments following a court ruling varied depending on the severity of the charge. But they deviated from standard, human justice as the cases involved matters of karmic proportions. Since Taehyung and Jimin were on a joint case, the judges decided on punishing them together, despite Taehyung’s plea of not guilty. They were subsequently shuttled off into the communal library. It was situated between the departments of Luck and Destiny (the former headquarters of Chance and Fate before reorganisation) to do further research for their plan.
“They told us that we have to do what?”
Jimin sighed for the umpteenth time as he ran his finger down the list of actions that he was allowed to do in his limited capacity.
“They told us that we have to work together and right our wrongs.”
Taehyung came over to the desk and picked up a book titled ‘Karmic Incarceration.’
“We have to see it through. They have to end up together, otherwise we’ll rot in those holding cells till the end of our days,” Jimin explained, flipping open another book.
“I’m at a disadvantage,” Jimin added. Taehyung thumbed his way through a leather-bound book with the thinnest pages, the letters bleeding through.
“Where’s the disadvantage? We get free board and lodgings, and we get to help out our clients,” he replied. Jimin’s eyes appear from the top of a book.
“I was talking more about having to work with you,” Jimin replied, marking some pages for reference. Taehyung pulled a face and rolled his eyes in response.
“Why are we here anyway? We already know what to do, just get them together and then happily ever after,” Taehyung huffed, setting the book down and taking a seat.
Jimin paused before answering since he was skimming a book on judicial ruling powers in the Fate/Chance universe. Jimin smiled at the library warden who observed them with suspicion.
“I wanted to check something I remember reading somewhere that if we mess things up too much - oh, here it is,” he said, placing the book in front of Taehyung’s curious gaze.
Should the defendant be unsuccessful during the reasonable period granted, Agents of Reason will be deployed to wipe the clients’ memories as a last resort. This is in order save the client’s general arc from further interference.
They were both stunned to silence until Taehyung began to speak.
“So, if we don’t -”
Jimin paced with armful of books to be returned to the shelves.
“And if they don’t get together -”
Jimin slotted the hardbound books into a cart, avoiding a warden’s prying gaze. Taehyung re-read Jimin’s handwritten notes, all in a neat, legible script. When he looked up, Jimin had taken the recent book to be photocopied. Taehyung squirmed from his seat, the gravity of their task sinking in.
“How long do we have again?” He asked.
“I think we have the most part of today and then early morning.”
Taehyung made a face of disbelief, which pinched his eyebrows and parted his mouth.
“That’s not enough time!” He exclaimed, startling the nearby visitors, who’s quiet reading got disturbed. The library warden glared at them, so Taehyung sank in his seat, his shirt swallowing him from the collar. Jimin shrugged.
“Budget cuts.”
Jungkook ended his shift on a high, his stomach screaming for a hearty meal. Back in his apartment, Yoongi was showering so he shed his jacket and collapsed on the couch. When he closed his eyes, his mind wandered to the events of the day until they landed in the morning, the image of the light filtering right through the floor to ceiling windows. The earlier collision, the light smell of sandalwood, warm, ethereal, enchanting. The floral print dress, the feel of your waist against his body, soft planes that felt so right in his brief embrace. He wondered if it was possible for someone so cute and so sexy to waltz into his life like that. You were even serenaded by the sound of bells, albeit coming from the café counter. It was kismet. In fact, it made going to work that much more pleasant. He never wanted to be late again.
“Are you asleep?”
Yoongi’s voice, a deep drawl, cuts through his musings. Jungkook cracked his eyes open and was met with a pale figure vigorously towelling his dark hair. His rounded eyes narrowed into slits as Jungkook stretched dramatically, his yawn echoing in his living space.
“I wasn’t,” Jungkook replied, instantly energised by the thought of the wonderful stranger that he happened to cross paths with. Yoongi had disappeared into the spare room, emerging half-dressed to leave. He patted his neck with some cologne, slapping his palms over his skin, diffusing the scent. Jungkook propped himself up on the leather couch.
“Where are you going, hyung?”
“The barbecue place, the one near the hair salon,” Yoongi replied, ruffling his hair, running his fingers through the wet strands.
Jungkook’s stomach rumbled, filling the silence as Yoongi retrieved the hairdryer from the nearby drawer. Over the noise, Jungkook collected his thoughts, preparing to plead his case to tag along. Once the roar ceased, Jungkook springs up, renewed.
“Can I join?” He asked, his stomach growling as a noise of accompaniment. Yoongi curled his lips into a line, puffing his cheeks as he scrolled down his phone.
“I’m seeing a friend but I’m sure you can tag along,” he mumbled, typing on his phone in careful strokes. Jungkook smiled, knowing that he would have some company.
Jimin had changed out of his suit in favour of comfier clothing like pyjamas, complete with a navy chequered robe. Taehyung had less of a dramatic transition, slipping out of his striped shirt for a black one, matching his slides. The control facility was one of the many bungalows in a village nearer the courts of Fate/Chance. It was sparsely decorated and utilitarian, the furniture being grey and beige, standard issue. Taehyung reached for a bowl of tortilla chips while Jimin chewed on some mixed nuts. There was a strange liberation that Jimin felt, to put his feet up and have nothing to focus on but one case.
“What’s the update? Oh, and here’s your tablet,” Taehyung asked while casting the image of the tablet on the TV in front. Jimin received it and pressed a singular folder that had their case number on it.
“I can use this?” Jimin asked, bringing up more charts from the folder.
This time, it was more organised, for which he was grateful. Taehyung nodded, flipping through the different livestreams to locate a better vantage point. A final choice brought out a high-definition image of a barbecue restaurant with the sounds of sizzling meat and overlapping conversations filling the speakers. He added another window where Jungkook and Yoongi were on the subway, the carriage dragging itself along the tracks speedily.
“Have we considered the fact that Yoongi will be third wheeling?”
Taehyung reached under the coffee table for a phone. He unlocked it and showed Jimin a string of messages, all from the department of Realism. Jimin’s eyebrows raised.
“Yoongi’s designated department is in Realism? Jeez.”
It was rare for a client to be in the department of Realism. They didn’t have advocates, rather, they had handlers. Clients such as Yoongi didn’t need to be guided, he knows what he wants, and his handlers simply wait at his beck and call. Jimin let out an impressed sound.
“I pulled some strings and had them intervene, he should be getting a call... about… now.”
Right on cue, as both Jungkook and Yoongi took the final step onto the street, Yoongi’s phone makes it to his ear, he halts and looks around the roads. Jungkook waits, his eyes on his phone. Taehyung unmutes the live feed.
“Yeah… ah, I told you to save the track constantly while you’re working on it… you need me there? Okay, I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.”
Jimin grinned. It was advised that with any case there should be a good start, here was evidence of that. Taehyung passed him the bowl of tortilla chips and he grabbed a handful, eating with enthusiasm.
Jungkook was never one to panic but he was counting on Yoongi’s company for the dinner. The moment Yoongi dropped out due to an emergency at work, he was left to beeline to the barbecue restaurant to meet Yoongi’s friend - a girl. Not that Jungkook is severely out of practice in social situations, much less with the opposite sex, but he wasn’t drunk enough not to make a fool of himself. The alcohol helped tease out his flirtations, not that he planned to go far with Yoongi’s friend, he just didn’t want to intimidate. Without inebriating himself first, he would appear like a shy, babbling mess.
Besides, his thoughts were thoroughly occupied by your encounter in the café. He was looking forward to eating and having an early night, ready for his morning shift so that he could catch a glimpse of you as he took your order. He recalled his parting conversation with Yoongi with clarity.
Hyung, I can’t meet her by myself - it’s gonna look like a set up!
What? No, it won’t. I’ve sent her a text saying to head over there even though I couldn’t make it, but you can. Make the most of the reservation, I had to be on hold for forty minutes to get that, don’t waste it.
That’s how he managed to take himself to the said restaurant and give Yoongi’s name so that he could be led to the relevant table. Past the narrowed space, he had to walk like a crab, taking care to avoid bumping into customers who bent and bowed from laughter over food. At the table, there was a girl with her back turned away. He noted the curve of her waist, the way her hair was swept to one side revealing a hint of neck. A final glance showed black jeans hugging shapely thighs, when she turned her head slightly, possibly due to the feeling of being watched, he asserted himself on the chair across her so that he wasn’t caught staring.
Too bad that intention lasted for about three seconds upon seeing your face.
“Did you go over their compatibility charts?”
Jimin only asked because that was standard procedure. Both he and Taehyung were watching the livestream and saw how Jungkook’s face fell at the sight of you. It was going to be a long night if they didn’t at least intervene.
“Of course, I did - why do you think I chose to mess with her chart?” Taehyung replied, sending through another report. As soon as it came up on Jimin’s screen, he scrutinised them, pinching the document for a better view.
Compatibility chart: Case No. 13062013_010997
Potential: 80+%
Factors to increase compatibility:
Dates, i.e., Fun fairs, Arcades, Skating, Roller-skating;
physical proximity - i.e., cuddling, back hugs, nuzzling;
willingness to improve/competitive spirits; and
It only took one look for Jimin to understand why Taehyung made such a choice.
“So, they’re horny, hopeless romantics?” He asked, finding it hard to believe that you, his client, share the same or similar traits as Taehyung’s client.
“Well, yeah. Just because she’s hasn’t had the best luck with the guys she’s been getting with doesn’t take away from the fact that Jungkook can give her what she needs and wants.”
Jimin knitted his brows together, scrolling past more statistics and bar charts. The data he got from his department wasn’t nearly as detailed as what he was reading. It made him wonder about his previous clients, whether he did put them on the right path after all.
“We don’t have time for the top three, so we have to focus on the last one,” Taehyung informed.
“Why hasn’t Jungkook been snagged up? His chart shows that he has nothing but good things to offer,” Jimin asked after coming across reports of Jungkook volunteering at an animal shelter, then pictures of him picking litter in his local area every other weekend. Taehyung exhaled a deep sigh, sinking into the couch, his gaze at the ceiling.
“He’s too busy getting laid. And it’s his own fault, he swerves everyone I throw his way,” he explained, pressing the heel of his palms onto his eyes.
“He seems to really be into her though,” Jimin said, trying to find the media controls so that he could raise the volume.
“It’s a good start, but we’ll see,” Taehyung replied, leaning forward to retrieve his tablet.
“You’re Jungkook from the café, right?”
You said your name as you introduced yourself, your smile being the one thing that Jungkook wanted to see. It was sweet and cute; he just didn’t expect to see it so soon. So much for delayed gratification. He saw how you took note of his tatted arm, the dark ink descending from his shirt sleeve. He closed his jaw, moving his lips in the most subtle way possible to will some movement that the rest of his muscles didn’t have. You were really in front of him and so, so close. It was torture. His serendipitous stranger appearing like a granted wish. Someone above must be looking out for him because he knew that a second chanced meeting didn’t happen every day.
“Uh, yeah. Yoongi-hyung had a work emergency and he didn’t want to waste the reservation… or stand you up,” he rambled, his leg bouncing underneath the table. Your stare made him nervous. He needed alcohol, he needed something to numb his adrenaline; he feels like the grooves of his brain was being filled with grout, going smooth all over.
“Are you guys living near each other then?” You asked, dragging your seat closer to let someone pass. Jungkook thought that he should be sitting there, not you. He gets up, making you flustered.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. Uh, he’s here for a couple of projects, and he’s staying at mine for a couple of days - let me sit there so you won’t get disturbed,” he said, smiling at you as you swapped.
“Oh, sure.”
When you squeezed past him, the scent of sandalwood wafted up, he feels your warmth, you were close enough to touch. He couldn’t help but gauge you, sweeping his eyes up and down. He noted the dips and swells of your body, and those thighs. He automatically wondered if they felt as soft as they looked. As soon as he sat down, he stopped himself from thinking, forcing such ideas away with internal meditation.
C’mon Jungkook. No thoughts, head empty.
Thankfully, your rearrangement coincided with the arrival of the food for grilling. The presence of the server made you both straighten up, quietening to an almost awkward atmosphere. The metal tongs scraped the grill, the meat colouring to brown, the thinner strips curling then singeing at the edges. The smell continued to entice him, so he focused on that, not at the fact that you were right in front of him, with the overhead lights casting a warm, romantic glow over your features.
Fuck, he was down bad.
The server looked at him and then you.
“Should I finish off the rest for you guys?” He asked, flipping over one of the mushrooms and pushing it so that there was more room for the meat.
“No, it’s okay. I can take over, thank you,” Jungkook said, reaching for the metal tongs, turning over the meat once more. You too had your eyes on the food, your hands were under the table. Jungkook knew that you were fidgeting, he did the same thing, he could tell by the subtle movements of your forearms.
"Do you come here to eat often?” He asked, starting with a simple question to warm up the atmosphere, there wasn’t going to be much talking if you were both too busy being stalwarts over dinner.
“Yoongi and I used to eat here a lot back when we were doing temp jobs,” you said, tucking your hair behind your ear. Jungkook’s hand twitched, his grip on the tongs tightening.
He could attribute it to one thing: he was nervous. There were butterflies that overtook the hunger he felt, you looked at him through your lashes. The meat was burning; he grabbed a small plate and laid them out.
“The first batch might be charred,” he said, crinkling his nose.
He was meant to be a good griller. That was his job when he was eating with his friends; that and wedging chopsticks between his lip and teeth so they gave him metal fangs. Bringing out the latter might be too soon. You lifted one up to taste, chewing carefully, not hinting at how it was charred. Jungkook knew because he tasted one himself shortly after.
“You don’t have to cover for me,” he said, feeling the heat rise to his cheeks.
He scratched back of his neck. If made any more mistakes, he would break into a sweat. You gave him a smile, the one that he instantly adored. The quirk of your lips, the way it slowly spread into a wide grin, then you raised your curled fist to cover it. Jungkook stopped himself from outwardly protesting against your actions.
No, don’t do that!
You brought your hand down and revealed as sheepish smile, closed lip but still lovely.
“Okay, but I’m counting on the next batch.”
“Can’t you fast track this?” Jimin asked, or rather commanded.
Dinner was dragging. He didn’t expect Jungkook to trip over his tongue this often. The more pressing issue is that Yoongi was nearly finished sorting out his work emergency. Taehyung lifted his finger, a signal to wait.
“I’ve sent in another request to his handlers.”
Jimin pinched the bridge of his nose as he watched Jungkook burn the next batch of meat.
Yoongi was about to log out when a cry from next door startled him.
“It’s gone! It’s all gone!”
He made his way to the neighbouring station calmly, unsure of how many slips ups he could take. The track that failed to be salvaged wasn’t too far along in production and he had worked on a previous, saved draft, tapping the save button with each modification. The sound engineer he worked with was frantically tapping on the mouse, the monitor in front showing a buffering sign, constantly turning. A sense of dread coils itself in Yoongi’s stomach. He had deadlines and he had just sent the current file through.
“Where is it?” He asked, leaning over on the table, his eyes narrowing into slits. He took the mouse and moved it across, willing the screen to change.
“I tried to save it and it just crashed.”
He rushed back to his desk; the same thing showed up. He dragged his hand down his face and looked at the time. It was getting late, and he anticipated that he wouldn’t be able to leave until dawn.
You weren’t expecting a meeting with Jungkook so soon, let alone be on a date with him. The dinner came and went. Afterwards, you walked and talked, letting yourselves be carried along with the crowds. The words exchanged weren’t important, it was the fact that as the night drew on, you were eventually intertwined with each other.
It began with an accidental brush of a hand, the friendly tug towards his chest since the lights changed and he didn’t want you to get run over. Then came the stumbling down the steep hill, somewhere in the middle of Itaewon, where the roads choked with crowds, so being pressed together was an occupational hazard. Overall, you really laughed more than you talked, which was a pleasant discovery since it seemed like you were communicating so much more.
Jungkook smelled even better up close, no, he felt even better up close. As you wedged yourself against the tide of people, he did his best to shield you from being jostled. It had the inevitable effect of your back pressing against his firm chest. Fresh laundry and something more masculine hit your senses, a welcomed contradiction.
When he walked ahead of you, but not enough that you had to rush, you thought about the fact that his right arm was covered in tattoos, each spaced out thoughtfully and became animated when he made gestures. And the fact that he had a chiselled jaw but soft features. And the fact that he had these expressive, doe eyes that widened or narrowed at every word you said. And he has that smile that seemed rare, the kind that pulled up all his features, showing all his teeth and crinkled the side of his eyes. You also didn’t forget about the fact that Jungkook was extremely attractive during the day and night. No surprises there.
“We actually covered a lot of ground,” he said.
You nodded, getting a good view of the silver brow bar that peeked through the dark strands of his hair. You were resting on a bench in a park near where he lived, you found that the direction you took drew you closer to his place than yours. Then, he stood up and you followed, until he climbed the metal rungs that led to the top of a slide. The space was small, so you were inadvertently pushed together, your sides lightly touching.
Jungkook lived on top of a hill and being elevated gave you a superior view to the resulting landscape: all the twinkling lights that dotted the mountains with the rest of the city concentrated further out. He was describing to you the numerous landmarks nestled in between the contours of the land, pointing out his usual haunts, then tracing the roads that resembled bright serpents. Busy with admiring the scenery and following his descriptions, you almost missed the fact that his hand had settled on your waist. The sudden proximity made you observe him. You see his bare face in profile, the soft and sharp slopes illuminated by the nearby streetlight. You see his strong brows, the curve of his nose, the shadows under his eyes, his sharp jaw, his unblemished skin with the lone scar that cut his cheek.
“This is a great vantage point; it gives the best view.”
You would have conceded straight away if not for the fact that he was looking at you when he said that, heightening the feeling of his hand on your waist. You turned your gaze back to where the lights blinked and shone.
“I bet you say that to all the girls,” you said.
When you turned, he grinned at you, a sort of self-assured smirk that lifts his mouth at the corner. Up close, you notice a small mole below his lips. His eyes remained on yours, a white glint cutting along the inky pools.
“And I bet you say that to every guy,” he replied.
You rolled your eyes and scoffed. His eyes were on you again, on your lips, the gap between you shrinking. You were so close that you pick up the scent of fresh laundry, the smoke from the restaurant that stuck to his jacket. Your breaths come together, the nudge of his nose. You close your eyes, feeling him press his lips against yours. It took seconds to register that you were kissing but when you finally got a hold of yourself, you realised that there was the same current you felt the moment you met running through you.
You should have known that your expectations would change soon after you and Jungkook crossed the threshold of his apartment, drawn to each other like magnets. Then again, it seemed like an inevitability.
Through the darkened space, he tugs you to his room, stumbling past the door. It opens to the sight of a sizeable bedroom and an equally sizeable bed. There were also posters on the wall along with some musical instruments, a desk kitted out with monitors, a gaming chair, and an RGB keyboard, flashing all colours of the spectrum in the darkness.
“Sorry about the mess,” he apologised, swiping something on the floor with the inside of his foot.
You surveyed the room again, thinking that that was the least of your problems once you see him shed his jacket. At the sight of his tattoos, your mind goes to soup; you live in the present, you shake your head. You bring up the fact that Jungkook, with his dark hair, silver brow bar, and ungodly body is right in front of you. Everything unfolds in slow motion. Though you supposed that that was your wish to savour it, to enjoy it all, because everything that has happened since the morning resembled something that was a nod to fate. It was as strange yet bewildering feeling. You’ve had your fair share of one-night stands but there was a sense of anticipation that you couldn’t shake around Jungkook.
He approaches you and you back up to his bed, sinking down, the firm mattress hitting the backs of your thighs. You feel a sense of vertigo of switching positions so swiftly that your hands curl around the edge. His large hands go over your thighs, firm and assured. Your gaze settles on his eyes, even in the dark you knew they were only on you. There was no point in overthinking, it would ruin things. You didn’t want that. That would be a cruel joke from whoever orchestrated this entire interaction.
Heat rises all over your body, setting you alight. You couldn’t gauge what Jungkook was thinking, his fingers digging into you, making your breath hitch. There was a pause. Hesitation or not, it didn’t matter. You lean as he leans, he crushes his lips to yours, his tongue finding his way between your lips, but it wasn’t forceful since you welcomed it. Jungkook tastes like first day of Spring but felt like the scalding heat of Summer, you feel the weight of him as he kissed you, the contours of your bodies fitting so perfectly that you wonder if your meeting really was fate instead of coincidence. You absorb his throaty hum, finding it so preposterous how that turned you on so much. His hands glide up, they find the buttons of your jeans, his lips busying themselves over yours. It overwhelmed.
It didn’t make any sense; Jungkook didn’t normally get this worked up over a kiss. The way you felt in his arms, the smell of sandalwood, the way your thighs fit perfectly under his grip, it was as if there were already memories of you impressed into his consciousness. Your lips feel so good against his, he was instantly fixated on the way his taste mixes with yours. But as much as he wanted to be gentle with you, he also wanted to fuck you, hard. At the thought, he couldn’t stop touching you, his hands slipping from your hair, down to your jeans, undoing the button, not shy about his insistent tugs against the rough fabric. With you, he imagined that the clothes looked better off and on the floor. Most of all, he wanted to put that theory into practice.
“Turn it off! Turn it off!” Jimin shouted, covering his eyes with his fingers. He wasn’t about to sit through what was quickly turning into a fuckfest. Taehyung dove to the table and searched for the media controls since there was the livestream of you and Jungkook about to strip and get it on.
“I’m trying!” Taehyung replied, digging his hands under the rubble of snacks that he and Jimin had while sitting through the barbecue dinner that you and Jungkook had.
His fingers splayed as his hand swept under the wrappers of candy and chips till he found the remote. As soon as it reveals itself, he points it to the TV and changed the scene to rolling fields and trickling streams, complete with elevator music in the background. Jimin lets out a sigh of relief as he depleted onto the couch.
“How long will this take?” He groaned. Taehyung shrugged, joining Jimin on the couch after the mad scramble to avoid the incoming indecency.
“It’s Jungkook we’re talking about. It could take all night,” he concluded. Jimin’s eyes widened, his jaw dropping at the same time. Taehyung reached to the hamper on the side for some standard issue ramen, mild for him and spicy for Jimin.
“At least they’re getting together, we can’t complain.”
Clothes hampered your need to get closer, so you got rid of them with a frenzied urgency that nearly resulted in threads snapping and buttons flying from their seams. Jungkook surrounded you, the fresh scent of laundry lifted from his sheets, the heat that never left him, the sheer strength that caused his muscles to ripple. He cradles your face, tipping your head back, his teeth softly catching your lower lip, stealing a gasp as his kisses grew deeper, more desperate, sucking on your tongue, bringing out your moans. You’ve never been the one to be overly vocal during hook-ups or sex, it struck you as being too fake, yet the way Jungkook handles you breaks your concentration, it forced your body to regress into something more primal. You knew that you wouldn’t be able to fake anything, if ever.
“F-fuck,” you gasped, his lips leaving yours to kiss along your jaw, down your neck. But soon after you say that you immediately pressed your lips together. Jungkook lifts his head, you see the outline of his broad shoulders, his smirk playing on his shapely lips.
“Don’t hold back, I want to hear you,” he said, his tone so unfairly even.
You sucked in a breath, your legs instinctively coming together to quell the throb between them. When you don’t answer, he dives back down, strong arms flanking you, the dark ink so beautiful that it catches you off guard, the way it covers his whole, right arm. He orients himself in a way that wedges his torso between your legs, firmly spreading you, his tongue soothing where he nipped at your neck. You bite your bottom lip, you try to imagine what it would be like once you got to fucking, the sounds you won’t be able to stop. Still, you moaned as he yanks the waistband of your underwear, pulling it down quickly, lifting your legs, tossing it elsewhere. He leans forward, his mouth lands on your nipple, you tangle your fingers in his hair, you tug as he groans, the flicking motion of his tongue driving you insane. You looked down, deeming that it was a little unfair about how he still had his jeans on whilst you were basically naked underneath him. You try to push them down with your hands and he gets the hint, but not before biting down on your hardened nipple, making you moan.
He parts from you, he does as you want, the useless fabric coming away. You drink him in, the way his body was sculpted, the size of his thighs, you were obsessed. Slowly, your eyes met and there was that grin that guys would usually get when they know that you want them, desperately. You thought about lying but it was futile, you couldn’t hide how wet you were.
You lift yourself up, the final layer being his briefs, which stuck to him, skin-tight. He leans into you, his lips on yours. You become more comfortable, you bite his bottom lip, you moaned as he grunted at your cold fingers finding the waistband, slipping down so that you push it away. His cock comes into view, so hard that his breath staggers as you hold it in your hand.
Fuck. He has a beautiful dick too.
Seeing it added to the charm of feeling it behind the barrier of clothing. You lean back, taking him with you as you slide your heels against the back of his thighs, he lifts his head only to look down and admire you. Something elevates in the air as he reaches above you, his hand swiping over the nightstand, grabbing a condom. He rips it open with his teeth, his rolls it over his cock. There wasn’t any more time to waste, you unfold yourself to him, angling your hips so that the head of his cock is poised at the right spot. He comes closer, your foreheads on each other’s, you hold your breath because you couldn’t wait any longer.
“If you’re uncomfortable, let me know straight away, okay?” He whispered, tentatively pushing his hips forward, one hand on your waist, his thumb making soothing circles. You were trembling beneath him, arching your back, your eyes fluttering close.
“Oh fuck,” you sighed, panting from the way his cock stretched your walls, filling you completely. Jungkook gasped. He fucking gasped as he settled himself inside you, as deep as he could go. He comes over you and you could tell that he was holding back, the power in his thighs still latent. You wind your hands down to his lower back, another low moan that mixed with yours.
“Shit… hold on,” he rasped, his shoulder pressing against the back of your knee, forcing you wide. You tightened around him involuntarily, feeling how wet you were, the sounds coming so naturally that you couldn’t hide them even if you wanted.
“Jungkook… fuck, you can move,” you moaned out, before all cognitive functions left you, rocking your hips despite being held down, the anticipation melting your insides into liquid.
Thankfully, he complies, bottoming out inside you, stilling again for what seemed like an eternity. A rather irrational thought that you had was that he was going to make you beg but before further protest, he grips your waist with more ferocity shoving his cock deep. A cry tears itself from your lips, muffled by how he leans down, kissing you, pulling out, then ramming his cock back down, hard enough to move you up his bed by several inches. The slight burn from the stretch is tempered by the pleasure that eclipses it, your words jumble in your mind, they cartwheel till they morph into a singular word. His name.
“J-jungkook… hgnh, Jungkook!”
He keeps going, his grunts loud in your ears, low sounds that was so fucking hot that you were gushing even before you came. He grinds his hips, and you feel it in your clit, the friction making you push your tits against his firm chest, the muscles hardened, the ink of his arm in your peripheries as he curls it over your head, tugging your hair, your whimpers escaping against his lips. Your hands skim over his shoulders till they find themselves on his hair, he clasped his hand over yours, bringing it up, his grip on your wrist pushing down, restricting you with his control.
“You’re so fucking hot,” he groaned, thrusting his cock into your pussy abruptly as you gasped, somehow deeper than the first time.
You raise your other arm and he traps that beneath his hand too, you close your eyes, moaning at the way he feels, how good it was. You let yourself indulge in him, your skin practically on fire. His lips find yours and it was like you taste heaven, his tongue, soft and languid, his thrusts rough and precise. Your muscles tighten from being pressed down, the rhythm of his hips ram down sending you soaring, your arms almost breaking free from his vice grip if not for how strong he was. Your arms bow from the bed, he grinds his hips down and pulls back only to slam back down, the audible squelch of your pussy taking all of him in sending all thoughts to scatter, like leaves in the wind.
“F-fuck, don’t stop,” you whined, the pleasure rising to a wave, and you don’t even resist it, letting it consume you till you drowned.
Jungkook’s mouth parts from you so he could see what he’s doing to you, his teeth baring themselves into a snarl, his dark hair plastered to his temple, the silver bar on his brow winking at you. He lifts his hand so he could flank your head and you were free to touch him, to marvel at the power in how he fucks you, the way his cock is relentless. Your hands found purchase in his hair, desperate tugs so you could hold on as your orgasm crashed down with such force that you almost push him out if not for him stilling. He savoured you, moaning in your mouth as your pussy clamps around him, pulsing so erratically that you keen, your cries swallowed by his kisses, his hips jerking into shallowly, making you squirm as your swollen clit rubs against him.
“Fuck,” you panted, disoriented from the way your senses had become muted.
He props himself up, just as breathless as you are with the same smirk that you sought, pulling out of you suddenly, tugging the condom down, he was on his knees in front of you. You feel his hands even before you register it, flipping you over and soon you found yourself lying on front. You couldn’t help but moan at the change, your pussy throbbing from missing the feel of his cock inside you.
“Put your legs together,” he commanded.
You comply because he had showed you that he knew what he was doing. You arch your ass up ever so slightly as his hand comes behind to palm your ass. A wanton moan slips past your lips, you press your face against his sheets, the smell of fresh laundry fought with the smell of sex. His thighs come on either side of you, his cock rubbing up and down your soaked pussy, his hand rests on your shoulder. You shiver at the contact, your arms folded, your fingers fisting the sheets.
Jungkook was losing his mind. The mere sight of you under him, on your front, your perfect ass all for him was enough to nearly spur him to orgasm. He sinks his cock in your pussy, shivering at how tight you were, spasming intermittently from how he made you cum. His hand leaves your shoulder just as you sob his name and something within him snaps, transforming into something he couldn’t control. He pounds into you with a sort of mindless greed that overtakes, forcing breathless moans from your perfect lips. He couldn’t stop even if he tried, the way your ass bounced each time his hips came down ripped a snarl from his throat, as if he couldn’t get deep enough, close enough, to the very core of you.
“Fuck, your ass is so fucking sexy,” he moaned, saying everything that came to him, thrusting into you so roughly that your reply turned into a startled yelp. He sees your back, feels the plush flesh of your thighs and ass, all under his control, he knows you’ll cum again, so he reached between you, his fingers finding your swollen nub, pressing then rubbing till he heard the sweet scream of ecstasy pour out of you. Your pussy clamped around his cock as you came again, thrashing your hips as you yelped. He wasn’t far off as you squeezed him with such force that he was reduced to pants, the familiar tension threatening to fracture through him.
“Jungkook! Oh fuck, fuck, fuck!” You cried, the sob of pleasure that had such a hold on him that it tipped him over, the sound of wet skin on skin so fucking lewd, that it coalesced with how he could feel every minute spasm. He came with a growl, harder than he ever had, spilling into the condom in thick spurts that caused him to come over you, his heart racing so hard that it was all he could hear as you whimpered, the aftershocks wracking your body. His abdomen contracted, his balls twitched as he rode every wave, his deep sighs settling on your skin, spent, and sated.
“Shit,” you laughed, after a while. Jungkook groaned softly, snapping out of his lust filled stupor, careful not to crush you, though his limbs did feel like jelly. He couldn’t speak yet, blinking as he tried to come back from oblivion.
“You okay?” You asked, sounding as pleasantly consumed as he did.
He saw you shift, your lovely profile coming to view. You glanced at him, that devilish quirk of your lips placing more ideas in his head. He follows your gaze till settles on his desk.
“Nice chair,” you mumbled, making him laugh.
“Thanks. Wanna try it out?”
“Okay, I’m not waiting any longer. It’s been hours,” Jimin hissed, his mind going numb from playing the free games that came with their tablets. Taehyung had a VR headset on, digitally painting something on the TV. It resembled another face, like his signature style.
“What time is it for them?” He asked, making a larger arc with yellow paint. It dripped down the white canvas, giving the appearance of the face crying.
“Right around dawn,” Jimin said, pausing Taehyung’s art to switch to the livestream.
It revealed the timestamp on the top right corner: 3:37AM. You and Jungkook were finally asleep, tangled up in each other. Taehyung comes up, next to Jimin who raised the volume. Static greeted them, that, and small snores from Jungkook, who was spooning you. Jimin pursed his pillowy lips, unsure of what to make of it.
“Is this good enough to get us released?” Taehyung asked, setting the VR headset down on the table.
Jimin narrowed his eyes on the livestream. They weren’t mind readers nor were they able to manipulate the actions of their clients directly, they merely facilitate so they adhered to their destined paths.
“The court order said that they had to end up together or at least have the potential of a first date,” Jimin said, thumbing down the numerous folders on the spare tablet.
“Says here that they’ll wake up in an hour’s time,” Taehyung added, showing Jimin some more information. Jimin clicked his tongue. He wanted to get back to his desk as soon as possible, even if he had missed the inspection.
“We can check then.”
Your eyes seemed stuck together when you tried to wake up, but the more pressing matter was that there was a heavy arm thrown over you. Soft snores permeated the air, the space between you and Jungkook was practically non-existent as he spooned you, his face buried in the crook of your neck. When you shifted, he grumbled, flipping onto his back. You raised yourself up, your muscles were warm and swollen, as if you had completed the gruelling marathon training that you had been putting off for the longest time. You take in your surroundings. Jungkook’s room. His keyboard was still on, the numerous lights pulsing in the darkness, the window was cracked open before you both slept, his bedroom door ajar. You rolled to your side and saw him with his mouth half open.
Then, the sound of an alarm pierced the tranquil space, causing Jungkook to flinch. A spike of adrenaline shoots through you as he groaned, getting up, rubbing his eyes vigorously. He reached over to you, but not before kissing your shoulder.
“Morning,” he said, sounding groggy. He found his phone, which was on a wireless charger, clicking snooze.
“You wake up this early?” You asked, watching as he pushed his hair away from his forehead. It was around 5:03AM. He shook his head, grasping for words as he woke up. His eyes were watery, and small tears threatened to spill as he yawned into his elbow.
“I set multiple alarms ‘cause I find it so hard to wake up. Last one is for 9AM,” he replied, leaning onto you, pressing his head on your shoulder.
“Oof,” you gasped, feeling his weight descend upon you at once. You stroked the hair that crept to the nape of his neck as he hummed in satisfaction.
“I should have left after, sorry. I'm not normally this absentminded,” you admitted.
And your body doesn’t normally feel like lead or sore all over after a hook-up.
It was a pleasure induced soreness, though. You couldn’t complain.
You feel Jungkook shake his head, he was so warm that you were slowly being lulled to sleep too.
“No, it's okay. I'm totally the same. You can stay here,” he said, his lips kissing your collarbone softly. Your heart leaps at the prospect.
Just then, you hear the front door opening. You and Jungkook freeze because you both knew it was Yoongi. All the lights in the apartment were on since you both crashed after fucking. It was a miracle that you were able to wake up from the deep sleep you experienced. There was some ruckus, the sound of Yoongi removing his shoes and dragging his slipper-covered feet along the floor.
“Jungkook? You still awake?” He called, there was the sound of a plastic bag being set down.
“Y-yeah hyung!” Jungkook replied. You dive below the sheets as Jungkook shielded you with his body. Moments later, there was a tentative knock, then the creak of the door opening wider.
“Am I interrupting something?” Yoongi asked. Even though it was muffled below you could tell that his voice was smug. You bite your lip as Jungkook was sitting on your feet and cutting off circulation.
“No hyung, did you just come back now?” Jungkook asked, his voice wavering since you reflexively wiggled your toes.
“Yeah. So many fucking issues at work. I got some breakfast. But I’m gonna get some sleep first. I’ve left it on the counter. Come out and have some when you’re ready,” Yoongi said, not bothering for an answer as he shut the door again.
You waited, holding your breath, then released it as Jungkook lifted the sheets, releasing your feet. He had that wide smile, the sides of his eyes forming lines as he embraced you, sharing in the victory of narrowly missing Yoongi’s assessment. He tucked his chin over your shoulder, staying like that.
“That was close,” you said, wrapping your arms around his waist. Jungkook laughed, nuzzling into you more.
It was a nice laugh, a memorable laugh. It had progression. You recalled this from the evening you spent walking around the city, from the way his smile widens from a close-lipped one because he couldn’t contain it. Then, escalating from sharp exhales from his nose into a full blown guffaw. You liked it up to point where you had to remind yourself that you had literally slept together once (or four times - if you were being pedantic), and the resulting vice grip he had on you just because of his laugh?
“Do you have some time later?” He asked, pulling back so he faced you, in time to see your eyes widen in surprise. Perhaps it wasn’t going to be a one-time hook-up after all.
“After work, I do,” you replied, realising that it was morning, and you had a full day ahead. Jungkook takes a moment to look at you, making you hyper-aware that your hair was probably a mess, your skin tired, and your eyes were swollen from sleep. He reached up to smooth a loose strand, and you duck slightly, sheepish.
“Want to go on a date?” He asked, his finger tracing your jaw, eventually hooking, and then tipping your chin up. You grinned, the giddiness consuming you all at once.
Taehyung bit his nails, a nervous habit. After reviewing the surveillance in the morning, he was sure that Jungkook hadn’t swerved you, nor was he setting you up for casual sex. Jimin left so he could get dressed, back to his suit so he was left to await the results of their release. As Jimin emerged from the bathroom, Taehyung saw a new notification:
He leapt from his seat into an excited cheer. Jimin’s eyebrows raised, his lips spreading into a smile. Taehyung reached for his half-eaten sandwich, which he was too anxious to finish while awaiting the results.
“We did it?”
Taehyung faced him, biting down on the soft bread.
“Yeah. Jungkook asked her on a date,” he replied, between a mouthful of chews.
Jimin clapped dramatically, pulling his jacket down as he straightened himself, gathering his items in preparation for his return to the department of Fate. On the TV was a livestream of you and Jungkook eating the food that Yoongi brought back. Your legs were already draped over Jungkook’s as you conversed. Jimin raised the volume.
“Yeah, I always believed in things being pre-determined,” you said, albeit hushed, so Yoongi wouldn’t hear. Jungkook nodded enthusiastically as he swallowed a big bite of food.
“Me too. I think that the life of person is all planned out, so I believe in destiny and fate,” he replied.
Jimin suddenly erupted in uncontrollable laughter, loud and all directed at Taehyung, who’s sandwich fell apart as his grip weakened. Jimin doubled over, his elaborate hairstyle unravelling at the fact that Taehyung’s client should have been assigned to his department.
“That’s probably why you found it so hard to control him,” Jimin said, breathless from laughing. Taehyung ran his tongue over his molars, then rubbed his lips together in consternation.
“Shut up.”
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softykooky · a year ago
the habits of a broken heart.
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☾ genre : soulmates au, unrequited love, art student!JK, english student!Y/N, angst, fluff, subtle enemies to lovers
☾ pairing : jeon jungkook x reader
☾ summary : jungkook and you are soulmates. so says the matching crescent moons on both your wrists. however, things are never as easy as they seem, and you are quick to learn that falling in love with someone who does not believe in love is a one-way ticket to heartbreak. 
“You still are, you know. Worth it.” You release a shaky breath. “But I was stupid to think that I am too.”
☾ word count: 26.3k (my biggest one yet!)
☾ author’s note: this took forever oh my gosh! i really hope you like it! it’s my first time writing such a big single piece, and trying a different style. thank you so much for your support, always! please let me know what you think ♡
The first time he had his heart broken, Jeon Jungkook had been 13 years old. He was fresh out of middle school and so ready to face his freshman year with an impressionable mind and plenty of voice cracks to earn him months worth of teasing. You see, at the age of 13, Jungkook wasn’t something to swoon over. He had yet to grow into his ears and Dr. Park assured him that his braces would be off as soon as she could get them. He was a little lanky and a bit too reticent to be considered social. So when a girl in his grade comes up to him, nervous and stuttering, and asks him to go to the heavily romanticized homecoming dance, Jungkook has already come to the conclusion that she might be his soulmate, even if he was far too young to get his mark yet. 
Her name was Mina, and Jungkook is confronted with this memory every time he visits home and his mother makes the family flip through the photo albums dating back to his high school years. He grimaces every time he sees the picture of them together. Him in a pink button-up to match her offensively ugly ruffled taffeta dress. 
Mina broke up with him three months after that picture was taken, through one of her friends no less and in front of his entire gym class. Jungkook couldn’t remember how long he cried for while he felt the pain from his first heartbreak would never go away, regardless of how much time passes. He held onto his mother and sobbed out the agony and humiliation of Mina not wanting to be his girlfriend anymore, and how he had lost his soulmate before he even knew it was her. His mother assured him that without the mark, there was no way to be sure and that there was hope. But back then, all Jungkook could think of was ways to avoid Mina the next day, especially when they sat next to each other in 3rd period biology.  
At 13 years old, Jungkook thought he would never find love again. 
He is 18 when he stands alongside his parents in a pale examination room and awaits his destiny. He’s leaving for college the next day, yet the only thing that’s making him nervous is the mark that will inevitably appear on his wrist in the next few minutes. The same one he would find on his soulmate’s, and Jungkook wonders if there is the possibility of scaring everyone away when the first thing he’ll ask on a date is: can I please see your wrist? 
To say the least, Jungkook is petrified. Because that mark on his wrist is going to serve as a constant reminder of his missing piece, and Jungkook knows he’ll always feel lacking until he finds them. It’s a crescent moon. Small and black and nestled comfortably on his skin. He knows many times the marks don’t have any correlation with the couples, but Jungkook wonders if you are an astrologist. Or an astronaut. Or just had a weird affinity for the moon. He smiles when they congratulate him and can’t stop himself from thinking that he might be in love with you already. Wherever you are. When he leaves for university, he feels less lonely when there is a crescent moon to accompany him. 
Contrary to the beliefs of his 13-year old self, Jungkook does fall in love again. Hard. This time, it was a girl with brown hair and big eyes and a smile so pretty he could see it from across a crowded room. She was a grade below him; a frazzled college freshman with no clue to where her lecture hall was, and he: a sophomore who had a compulsion of changing his major every other month. When he met her, it had been chemical engineering and three weeks before that was film composition. Her name was Yoojung, 18 years old while he was 19.
 Her soulmate mark is a single star, and even though he knows she is not his soulmate, he can’t help but to think how perfectly their marks complement each other. How they would make a perfect night sky. 
They had met at a frat party, no less, and the combination of cheap booze and bad hiphop music had made her look so incredibly gorgeous under the dim lighting. They had their first kiss in a random person’s living room, highly intoxicated and much too irresponsible and Jungkook had barely even remembered it in the morning until she showed up at his doorstep and invited herself in. Yet it wasn’t too long before he made a perfect space for Yoojung in his life.
 Each day after his physics lecture, he’d go to her dorm and they’d chat over breakfast until she had economics at 10 o’ clock. After she was done, he’d insist that they go get a greasy hamburger at the joint his friends took him to when they got high and, she’d end up dragging them both to the health food restaurant that prided themselves on only using organic. Leave it to Jungkook to find himself a vegan girlfriend. 
Sometimes though, when he looks at Yoojung, his mind drifts to his actual soulmate and a little flower named guilt blooms in his chest. But he is so young and his other half could be anywhere in the world, so Jungkook thinks there is no harm in allowing himself to indulge in a little affection. These days, it wasn’t completely abnormal for soulmates to part ways, and when Yoojung is in his arms, Jungkook likes to think that his soulmate would understand. They would want him to be happy. In the middle of synchronizing their busy student schedules and sneaking in quick kisses through cramming for finals, he had found it unnervingly easy to fall in love with her. 
Deeply and blindly in love. 
Yoojung brought him home to her family on fall breaks and the occasional winter vacation and Jungkook had melded perfectly into their dynamic. The son I never had, her father would tell him over the dinner table while her mother constantly made sure his plate was piled high. Her little sister was visibly in love with him, and would ask Yoojung where he was every time she came home from university, yet avoiding him at all costs when he was there. 
Jungkook’s own family, however, was a different story. To put it delicately, they had liked it more when he came home by himself and left her at school. It had put a strain on their relationship sure, but at the end of the day, Jungkook loved her. A simple love. 
Every day he remembers that their marks do not match. But if this is love and he feels like he is on cloud 9 with every moment they are together, Jungkook begins to doubt if the universe’s will is truly divine and successful. Maybe Yoojung was his soulmate and it did not matter what was on their wrists. 
He loved her intensely, and she did him. She was the first thing on his mind when he woke up and manifested in his dreams when he slept at night. To Jungkook, Yoojung could do no wrong. Like some sort of divine being or angel that the heavens sent just for him, and he found himself thinking maybe he wouldn’t mind spending the rest of his life beside her. 
But he would come to learn that the higher the climb...the harder the fall. 
Jungkook and Yoojung were together for the better part of 4 years before she cheated on him with a guy that she’d supposedly met a couple weeks ago. When Jungkook screams at her asking why she had been disloyal, Yoojung shows him her wrist. Her single inked star. 
“I found my soulmate, Jungkook. And I love you so much, you know I do. I didn’t know how to tell you so I…”
The rest of her words fade into white noise and all Jungkook can do is look at her and commit every detail to memory as he feels her fade farther away. Her teary and remorseful brown eyes. Her plush lips. The fan of her eyelashes and the mole on the side of her temple. He’ll never get to see her like this again. 
“I was ready to be with you, soulmate or not. I know it’s not fair but I wanted the same from you”, he whispers, falling down on the couch and burying his face in his hands. 
“Soulmates be damned, the universe was wrong. I was so hideously in love with you. How could you not at least tell me when you met him?” Jungkook feels his heart collapsing in on itself with every word of resignation. Of burgeoning acceptance. Yoojung can only mirror his desolate expression and stares down at the star on her skin.
 Jungkook wishes it were a moon. 
“Just go, Yoojung.” 
It would have hurt less if it was only a one night stand with a stranger she did not know the name of. He was in love and spineless enough to move past a one night stand. However, Yoojung had found her soulmate and fallen in love with him. Jungkook had merely acted as a placeholder for the real deal to come along and sweep her off her feet. 
This time he doesn’t cry. Just stares out the window of his living room and wonders what it would be like to disappear altogether. When the door is slammed shut, and he is left to nurse his aching soul, Jungkook apologizes in advance to the person that shares the same mark on their wrist as him. He no longer believes that soulmates exist. 
When Jungkook looks back at his 13 year old self with the innocent construct of what heartbreak feels like, he wants to laugh and maybe slap that stupid boy upside the head. Yoojung had destroyed him. Destroyed the innocent and starry-eyed person that he’s tried so hard to preserve. Destroyed his vulnerability and bright outlook on life and in their place, cultivated walls of rock and steel meant to keep everyone out and him safely tucked inside. In her wake, Yoojung left behind a shell of a man who pushed his emotions so deep he became numb and forgot what it was like to feel. 
So Jungkook does what he always does to push away the hurt. He changes his major; to art history this time. He stacks up bracelets on his wrist to forget the mark of a moon. He scrapes up his rainy day money and treats himself to the most expensive pair of Saint Laurent boots he’s ever worn. He tests the limits of the human liver, and takes advantage of the biceps and jawline he’s acquired since high school to establish a reputation. 
To his friends, Jungkook remained raucous and always down to order infinite rounds of shots until he couldn’t see straight. To those that looked even closer, Jungkook was so completely shattered he didn’t even feel it anymore. 
The second time he had his heart broken, Jungkook was 23. He promised himself he wouldn’t let it happen again. 
“For the last time, Jimin, I’m not going to give you a blowjob so you can pay for my student loans.”
You don’t know how many times you’ve had this conversation with your roommate. Most of the time, it was convenient to have a roommate whose parents were loaded and sent him monthly installments that looked more like small loans than allowances. You knew he just wanted to help. Heck, he probably would be willing to pay them off for you without the promiscuous favor, but you had made it clear to Jimin that you wouldn’t be riding off of his charity. 
“Ugh, Y/N you’re really no fun”, he sighs, falling backwards onto your twin-sized bed and feigning devastation. You reward his melodrama with a giggle, ruffling your hands through his fried hair. Jimin had a knack for changing his hair color as quickly as his mood. 
You look at the bill that’s staring back at you from your computer screen, and it feels like it’s just reached out and punched you in the face. “Hey do you think it’s a common mistake for bank tellers to add a few too many zeroes?” 
“Yeah, you’re right. I’m rationalizing as a self-defense mechanism.” Sometimes it was annoying that your roommate had a degree in psychology. Then again, Jimin was making more money than you and your degree in English. 
You sigh deeply and look up at the ceiling in attempts to quell your tears of frustration. And also because it is a plea to whoever is up there controlling your destiny: please I’m begging you. Melt my debt away. 
You and Jimin sit in comfortable silence and he plays with the hem of your worn comforter while you scroll through the emails you have been ignoring in your inbox. You want to smash your head in at all the deadlines. Times like these, there is one thing that brings you comfort and always has since you turned 18. 
The quaint little crescent moon that sits right atop your radius. 
You had a habit of pressing your thumb against it and feeling your pulse against the mark, stupidly wondering if your soulmate’s heartbeat has synched up with your own. If he was out there somewhere, touching his mark and wondering the same about you. He was taking his sweet time, that’s for sure. Jimin sees your nervous tic and sighs again.
“You’re so hopelessly romantic it makes me want to barf, Y/N.” You scowl at his words and chuck a pillow at his unsuspecting face. 
“I don’t understand you, Jimin. Your soulmate is out there and you’re not the slightest bit curious? You don’t want to do anything extra to find them?” Jimin looks at you with a knowing smile.
“That’s exactly it, though. I know they’re my soulmate and I’ll find them when the time is right. So why worry about it? It’s better not to force anything.” His statement is followed up with a grin and his fingers reach out to pinch your cheeks. This was the dynamic of your friendship. He is easy-going and flows like a careless river. You’ve read one too many books to not vie and daydream for the moment you lock eyes with your soulmate. 
Your mom always said that you’ll know just from a look. It’s like getting hit over the head with a ray of sun, she said. Like suddenly their eyes are the only eyes you ever want to look into again. Since then, you’ve dreamt for the day you find someone with that same moon on their wrist. For now though, you had more immediate concerns more along the lines of crippling debt. 
“What do I do, Jimin? Should I be a stripper?” He laughs and the thought makes you groan. You couldn’t even walk in heels, much less try to dance or look like you didn’t have two left feet. Stripper life just wasn’t for you. 
“Hm...I could call in a few favors for you at the office. Get you an internship or secretary position.” 
“Maybe. Too much nepotism. Your father owns the office you work at”, you remind him, and his eyebrows crease further in thought. God, maybe you do have to be a stripper.
“Wait!” Jimin yelps so suddenly you almost fling the computer off your lap. 
“I think I know someone. He’s been looking for a model for his art portfolio or something, and he said he’s willing to pay.” Jimin reaches for his phone and his thumbs type up a storm while you watch from the sideline. 
“I think he mentioned it’s about a month-long project. You’d just have to be on call whenever a stroke of genius arrives.” 
“That sounds great! I’m an amazing model!” you crow, to which Jimin giggles again.
“The several candids I have in my camera roll tell a different story, Y/N.” Naturally, he receives another pillow to the face. But you follow up with a cheery kiss to his cheek as you rejoice in the new opportunity for cash flow by a celebratory dance, which looks more like a wiggle when you remain seated on your bed. 
“Thank you, thank you, thank you!”, you chirped, “I owe you one.”
“Hey...I know how you can repay me.”
 When you look towards him, his eyebrows are raised inquisitively and there’s a devilish smirk on his lips.
Jimin gets a third pillow to his face that day. 
Jungkook’s favorite type of arguments to get into is whether Neo-classicism or post-impressionism had the most impact on European art and architecture. Call him a snob, but he loves to prattle on about Degas and Caillebotte until his opponent tires or concedes out of pure exhaustion. Jungkook regards it as a battle strategy: bore your enemy so that they stop fighting. 
He’s in the middle of a heated debate with his classmate from graduate school when he receives a phone call from Park Jimin. Now, Jungkook has no idea how or when Jimin became an installment in his life, or how he’s roped his way into his inner circle. He just remembers waking up one day with a killer hangover and finding that there was a pink-haired stranger lying on his floor. When he tried to shoo him out, the stranger shoved a wad of money in his shirt pocket, muttering “just five more minutes”, and Jungkook was in no position to deny easy cash. Jungkook now considers Jimin one of his close friends. 
“What’s up, Jiminie?” He laughs into the microphone. 
“I told you not to call me that, you brat. I’m older than you.” 
“I’m taller than you.”
“My dick is bigger.”
“I-okay fine you got me there.” He hears Jimin wheeze over the line as he tries to rein himself in to say what he needs to say. 
“In all seriousness, though. I have a proposition for you.” Jimin lilts in a mischievous tone, which makes Jungkook nervous enough to get up from the café table he had been sitting at with his friend and careen to a quieter corner. 
“Okay, so you know how you were telling me about your portfolio for the gallery. The one you have to submit by the end of the season? How you needed a model on call 24/7 in case inspiration struck?” 
Jungkook wants him to spit it out because he has been searching high mountains and low valleys for someone that would be willing to be his muse for a month or two. Constantly at his beck and call so he can finish this damn portfolio and get his name out there in the art world. Maybe start debating post-impressionism with the cream of the crop. 
“I think I’ve found someone to do that for you.” Jungkook exhales in relief at his words.
“She’s my roommate and she’s super low on cash and unemployed with a bachelor’s in English literature, so she’s got time to spare.” Perfect. That way, Jungkook can call her whenever he needs to.
“That’s amazing, Jiminie. Can she meet me at the art building tomorrow at noon? We can start right away.” Jungkook breathes through the phone, a small weight coming off his shoulders now that another thing had been accomplished. One less thing he had to worry about on the journey to his goal. Jimin confirms the plans and they exchange pleasantries before Jungkook hangs up as the man on the other line starts screaming about his burning lunch on the stove. 
Jungkook catches sight of the mark on his wrist when he looks down, and quickly rearranges his bracelets so that it is once again covered to his eyes. Out of sight and out of mind. 
The gallery portfolio had been a thorn in his side. It had been months in the making and if he allows himself to reminisce, Jungkook remembers the nights he and Yoojung stayed up until dawn and talked about his blossoming interest in art. How he wanted a space of his own to display his works. Back then, she listened to him with stars in her eyes and basked in the afterglow of post-coital cuddling, promising that she would help him achieve it. 
His heart sinks at the memory of the imprint of her tresses of hair spilling on his bedspread. He burned those sheets the second she left. 
Jungkook represses his intrusive thoughts about Yoojung and wills her to get out of his head. He forces it down until it feels like he’s just dumped ice water over his heart and vomited out any semblance of emotion. He makes his way back to the cafe table with a sly smile that hides the internal ache he’s promised himself to never let anyone suspect of. 
“So what were you saying about Renoir’s Moulin de la Galette?”
The art building is situated besides a library, with a bakery flanking its left. Two years spent at the university, and you’ve never once stepped foot there. Maybe it was the daunting abstract sculpture on the front lawn or the prejudices you held against annoying art snobs on their high horses, but you often found yourself subconsciously avoiding the space in intimidation. 
“Okay, Y/N, you’re going to do this so you can pay off your loans”, you whisper under your breath, words meant for your ears and no one else’s. “And if he asks you to pose nude, you run the opposite direction.” 
It was easy to get lost in the building. For art students that know how to draw, they really took advantage of abstractionism to make the most confusing map you had ever seen in your life. Luckily, with some direction from the vapid front desk secretary and some intuition, you were able to to find room 62B. You don’t think you’ll be able to forget the number 62B if you tried, Jimin had screamed it to you so many times as you left the apartment. 
The door soundlessly opens with a nudge of your hand and you stick your head inside.
“You know when Jimin told me he found me a model, he didn’t mention her lack of punctuality.” His voice is calm and subdued with no lingering annoyance, even if his words are uncourteous. You whip around to him and the first sight you see of Jeon Jungkook is merely a tuft of brown hair behind a vast canvas. And some expensive looking leather boots that anchor his feet to the ground. 
You clear your throat and approach with an outstretched hand and the shiniest smile you can muster. 
“I’m Y/N. Jimin’s roommate. It’s nice to meet you.”
“You can call me Jungkook.”
It is when he steps out from behind the canvas that you finally understand what your mother meant when she said meeting your soulmate feels like getting hit over the head with a ray of sunshine. You can’t describe it any other way, but that’s exactly what it feels like. Like the air becomes so sweet in your lungs it turns to viscous honey. Like suddenly the person standing in front of you is Valentine, encapsulated. 
You know he feels it too, yet you don’t know why he forces himself to remain blasé, and if you hadn’t seen his widened eyes and heard the gasp from his lips you would have never suspected anything at all. Stranger courtesy is abandoned and you forcefully grab his wrist, turning it over to find his mark while pulling up your sleeve to reveal your own. 
A little black crescent moon.
Right on the pulse point.
Just like your’s. 
When you finally muster up the nerve to look into his eyes again, you wonder if it is healthy for the human heart to beat so fast and so thunderously it feels ready to jump out of your chest. Jungkook, however, still wears that same expression on his face. Flat and cold, not even a glimmer in his eyes. He stares at you disinterested and wrenches his wrist from your grasp. 
“Wait, Jungkook...aren’t you….”, you sputter through a desperate smile, “aren’t you happy?” He stays silent and trains his attention on the canvas in front of him, but you can see the conflict that swirls in his iris. 
“I’ve been looking for you for so long! And I’ve finally found you. In the art building no less, just my luck that-”
“Y/N, I don’t know what you expect from me but I’m not looking for anything right now.” 
There were no objectively ugly words. But you think the ones that have just spewed from Jungkook’s lips come pretty close. They stoke a fire in your chest.
“What do you mean? We’re soulmates”, you faltered, sinking deeper into confusion as you stare at the unaffected man in front of you, whose only concern is the conglomerate of paint on his palette. 
Jungkook sighs monotonously. Almost as if he had better things to do than be here.
“It’s only a mark on your wrist. And we just happen to have the same one. Amazing that you still think somehow one single person was made entirely just for you.” His words are bored and he doesn’t even have the decency to look you in the eye when he speaks. You think you might want to punch him if you weren’t so speechless.
“Look”, he sighs as if you were inconveniencing him, “I’m not going to sugarcoat it and tell you that I’m the one you’ve been looking for this whole time. We have the same mark, but...I’m not the guy you want.”
“B-But...I’m your soulmate. We-we’re made for each other.”
Jungkook scoffs harshly, and you want to sink into the ground. “That’s just a silly myth.” 
“So you don’t...believe in soulmates?” The words felt wrong to say when all your life, finding your soulmate felt like the ribbon at the end of the finish line. But here he was now, and you felt so small under his gaze. Like you weren’t meant to be there and standing in the same room with him was a concoction for heartbreak.
Jungkook’s syllable pangs in your ear, and you think it might be your least favorite sound. Then you leave. And if it was hard for you to meet your soulmate - the person who you’re destined to be with - who doesn’t believe in you, then walking away from him was a different cross to bear. 
You take the bus home and ignore the glare of strangers when you burst into tears at a red light, and cry the rest of the way back. Your mother hadn’t described this. She prosed on and on about the feeling one gets after finding a soulmate but never mentioned to you how it feels when you find out they want nothing to do with you. What do you do when you realize the person you’ve been chasing for forever has been trying to run away at the same time? 
Jimin holds you together that night on your bedroom floor, while you break apart and scratch at the moon on your wrist until your skin breaks. He listens to the words you sputter; as much as he can decipher when they are drowned out by the painful sound of your sobbing. Jungkook’s beliefs bleed into your consciousness. Perhaps he is right and perhaps there is no such thing as true soulmates, and the marks are obsolete. 
However, when you fall asleep in your friend’s arms from the physical fatigue of violent crying and the sheer mental exhaustion of meeting Jeon Jungkook, your mind comes to a more painful conclusion. 
A more truthful conclusion.
Your soulmate only needed to meet you to decide that he did not want you.
Jungkook doesn’t believe in soulmates. He thinks they’re a stupid coy to give people false hope. An illusion to feign happiness and to take Yoojung away from someone she genuinely loved. Though in the hours of the night, when he is by himself and the bed feels too big for one body, Jungkook wonders if there is truly a reason why someone has an identical moon on their wrist. But he is still so broken and unhealed from the wounds Yoojung left behind.
 So instead of soulmates, he thinks about what she must be doing. If she’s eating well. If she’s moved in with her own soulmate and if they’re happy together. Jungkook is an involuntary masochist and he pays for it with every pillowcase that becomes stained with his tears. 
He sighs out an expletive after downing a shot of whiskey, relishing in the familiar burn as it slides down his throat. Alcohol doesn’t seem to be working efficiently, though. He’s only barely tipsy after years in college building tolerance, and he can still see your face each time he blinks. Like you are imprinted on the back of his eyelids. Jungkook wonders why Jimin had cancelled on the group tonight. 
There is a little devil called remorse and it stands atop his shoulder, unseen by everyone but him, and Jungkook decides he will get rid of it by calling another round of shots. From his seat in the dirty booth, he can see Min Yoongi and his soulmate practically dry humping on the dance floor. If anyone asks him if he ever gets jealous seeing soulmates happy and in love, he’ll laugh in their face and tell them he pities people like that. People that are so blinded by the system. But loneliness is a stern mistress and it makes him think of you. How lovely the moon looks on your wrist. How your hand felt so warm when it caressed against his skin. 
He tips his head back again. Vodka this time.
“Dude, are you okay?” 
To his right comes Kim Taehyung, designated driver extraordinaire, and he looks at Jungkook with friendly concern laced with amusement. Jungkook nods contentedly. 
“Soulmates are so bullshit, Tae”, he snickers, fingers tracing the rim of the shot glass and smirk on his face to mask the bitterness of both the alcohol and his heart. Taehyung spares a knowing glance, resting a hand on his friend’s shoulder with the weight of knowledge of Jungkook’s past. 
The night is young and so is he. He drinks until he can no longer taste the liquor and forgets altogether about what had happened only a couple of hours before. Until the crescent mark on his skin just looks like a shapeless black blob, and it makes him smile. He thinks he likes it better that way. 
Taehyung drops him home and personally tucks him into bed while he is still in jeans and his shirt smells like the bar. His sleep is dreamless that night. When the morning comes and his friends tease him about how he begged Taehyung not to leave, Jungkook will laugh and blame the alcohol for his foggy memory. He won’t tell them that he does remember, and that he was only grasping at any warm body to soothe his aching loneliness.
Usually when he first opens his eyes in the morning, Jungkook is thinking about the next class he has to attend and if he is late (which is usually most of the time). This morning, albeit morbidly hungover, Jungkook thinks of the apple strudels they sell at the bakery next to the art building. Mrs. Kim always gets the pastry to filling ratio just right. But when he opens the door with a jubilant smile on his face and the scent of baked goods already in his nostrils, Jungkook has a feeling apple strudels will have to wait. 
There you are. In all your messy-haired glory, huffing like a caged bull in the doorway of his apartment, fiery gaze directed completely at him and all he can think to say is:
“How do you know where I live?” Jungkook schools his face expressionless in your presence. He hopes this will discourage you, but it only makes you angrier. 
“Park Jimin”, you snarl. 
Of fucking course, it’s always Park Jimin. Jimin who drunkenly sleeps in his bedroom and now Jimin who is leaking his address to any stranger.
“Um”, Jungkook stammers and takes a step back, “what are you doing here? Didn’t I get my point through yesterday?” He can see the statement catching you off guard, and the fury in your eyes dwindles to dejection. Only for a millisecond though, before you are aiming your wrath at him once again. 
You take a deep breath. “What is wrong with you?” 
Jungkook can think of a lot of answers to that query. He opts to interpret it as a rhetorical question and keep his mouth shut. 
“You just...found your soulmate! I’m your soulmate! And you don’t even want to get to know me? At all?”, you scream exasperatedly. Jungkook catches the gaze of a middle aged lady who is not-so-discreetly staring at the two of you, and pulls you inside his apartment by your arm. If you weren’t so frustrated, you would have been flustered at the physical contact. 
“Listen. Soulmates don’t end up together all the time. I’ve told you I’m not really interested in anything right now and it’s not a priority”, he takes a breath through his passionate monologue, “and I’m sorry that that’s not something you expected, but I….don’t want a soulmate.”
Maybe...he just doesn’t want you. 
When he says them out loud to a living breathing person, Jungkook realizes how cruel it sounds. He can see it in the way your eyes have become glossy under his living room lights and the way you shrink into yourself as self-defense against his blows. He rationalizes that he’d rather tell you the truth than lie to you now, only to hurt you later. Really, he’s doing you a kindness. Right?
You turn your back to him to gather your thoughts, and wipe the tears that you refuse to let him see. The salty drops sting the raw skin of your wrist after last night, and you are brutally reminded of the current reality. His brutal honesty makes you want to abandon all hope, but you were a woman with a plan. You came here for a reason, not to just lose your temper in your soulmate’s apartment and tell him what you really thought about him.
“I have a proposition for you”, you asserted calmly, staring Jungkook in the eye as he remains unbothered. 
“Now I reckon something’s happened to you to make you lose all your faith in soulmates, so I’m not forcing you to do anything you don’t want to do.” Your eyebrows furrow when you speak focusedly.
“We don’t have to be together. That’s your will. But…”, you hesitate, pushing past the uncertainty and fear of another rejection from Jungkook, “will you let me at least try? You don’t have to promise anything. Can we just start as friends?” 
Naturally, Jungkook wants to shoot down your offer, kick you out of his apartment, and pretend like he never met anyone by the name of Y/N. Call it divine intervention but when he looks at you, pleading for any semblance of connection, he feels a tug at his heart strings. So Jungkook makes another promise to himself. He would let you “try”, whatever that entails. But there was no virtual possibility of letting you any closer than necessary. 
You both stand in contemplative silence before he lets out a resigned sigh. “On one condition”, he responds slowly, but there is already a premature grin growing on your face and you don’t think you could stop it even if you tried.
“You still have to be my model for the art portfolio.”
You agree before he even gets to take another breath. 
When you finally make your way out of Jungkook’s apartment, parting ways with an awkward number exchange and a ‘see you later’, there is a simultaneous feeling of hope and desolation. The optimism for Jungkook combines with the insecurity that perhaps you, just as you are, is not nearly enough to make someone fall in love. Especially someone who disregards their soul connection to you. 
You walk back to your apartment with a heavy heart that warms with embers of determination. Jeon Jungkook was an enigma. A Bastille fortress of self-defense mechanisms and destructive tendencies, and you know that there is unresolved pain. Call it a soulmate instinct or something, but you see it in his eyes. You see it in the way his face begs to show emotion but his mind refuses to acknowledge. 
You know Jungkook is not obligated to accept you after the dust settles, much less fall in love with you. Under the peach blossoms of the campus sidewalk, you make a promise anyway.  To yourself and to your soulmate and the silly little mark on the inside of your wrist. Even if he does not love you, you vow to help Jungkook learn to love himself.
When you are harshly woken up at 5:30 in the morning, the last person you expected to be blowing up your phone was Jeon Jungkook. If it weren’t for the pure exhaustion seeping through your bones, you would have been excited about your soulmate calling you. Alas, slumber was your soulmate now. Jungkook would have to step down. 
On the other side of the paper thin wall, Jimin is frustratedly banging from his room, your ringtone reverberating throughout the entire apartment. You pick up his call without even opening your eyes.
“Y/N I need you to come to my apartment as soon as you can.” There is no sleepiness in his voice. Just clean and cold like it always is and he has hung up before you get the chance to scold him for waking you up at this unholy hour. You’re about to give him a piece of your mind but you remember he is paying you very handsomely for your efforts, and reluctantly drag yourself out of bed to call an uber. Thank god he doesn’t live too far away otherwise you’ll stick a foot through his canvas for the transportation bill. 
The front of Jungkook’s apartment door is strangely therapeutic, and you find yourself falling asleep standing up after you’ve rung the doorbell. Either time passes too slowly when you are sleep-drunk or Jungkook moves to get the door as quickly as your grandfather does. Whatever the case, you are about to pass out on his doorstep if he doesn’t come soon.
“Y/N, why are you just standing there? The door has been open.” 
“Jungkook. Why are you making me do this so early?”, you yawn, pushing inside the apartment. 
Jungkook takes in your discombobulated appearance, and almost wants to laugh. You were still in your pajamas, and the bun on your head now looked more like a heaping blob that drooped down your temple. It was obvious that you had just rolled out of bed and he almost feels bad for disturbing your sleep, but he does not decide when his strokes of inspiration spontaneously appear. 
The living room is bombarded with Jungkook’s art supplies and stray canvases, and you take note of the clay sculpting table that blends in as furniture next to his kitchen. You plop yourself down on the stool across from Jungkook’s easel, eyes still half closed and impossibly tired.
 In this moment, Jungkook wipes the fact that you are his soulmate from his mind. He needs to do the portfolio. That is all he’s keeping you around for, and the only reason he agreed to your plan was so that you would remain his art model. 
In the silence of his makeshift art studio, Jungkook paints whatever comes to his mind, referencing your figure on the stool for the curves he can never get right without a model and need for a human presence to translate onto his canvas. You become more lucid as time goes by and the sun starts to rise from outside his window, sitting up straighter and paying more attention to his concentrated face as Jungkook pours himself into his creation. 
Looking at him in this light, you realize that he is beautiful. And not just because he’s your soulmate. Jungkook’s hair is scruffy and stubbled, undereyes sporting impressive dark circles. But the way he caresses the paintbrush and the way his body moves to the beat of the painting is poetic. He glances at you sporadically, eyes darting to and fro to capture as much as he can before the creativity burns out. He is beautiful and it makes your heart ache to know that he does not want you. In spite of the bond the universe has created. 
You wonder if in his focused hazed, he notices the new glaze across your eyes and the silent sound of your soul calling out for his. You wipe away the first dripping tear as quickly as it came. You know Jungkook sees, but does not bat an eye and you can’t tell if you’d rather prefer him to acknowledge it. 
It’s 8:00am when he puts the paintbrush down, takes a step back, and surveys his work. His eyes trail over each organic line and areas where he decided to use burnishing instead of cross hatching. It’s far from perfect, but it’s enough. 
“Okay. You’re free to go”, he announces, plucking the painting off the easel and resting it against the wall, hidden from your eyes. 
“W-What? That’s it?”, you sigh disappointedly, “you’re not even going to let me see it?” Jungkook shrugs. His detachedness makes you want to rip your hair out and sob into your pillow at the same time. You don’t understand how a person could be so unfazed. 
“S’not ready for debut. Thanks for showing up, though.” He doesn’t spare you another glance. Just goes back to cleaning his brushes and dumping out the glasses of murky paint water. You ignore the twinge of hurt in your chest and slide off the stool. 
“Okay, fine. Now it’s my turn. Would you like to go have some breakfast?”, you smile expectantly to Jungkook, who stares at you with an indifferent gaze. His first instinct is to make up a half-assed excuse to get out of this, eager to detach himself from you as much as possible and avoid any more interaction. However, he was insanely hungry, and the glimmer in your eye just looks so hopeful even Jungkook couldn’t bear to shoot you down.
He sighs with resignation. A little breakfast couldn’t hurt, and he wasn’t going with you necessarily. You were just...going to the same cafe in the same direction as him and likely sitting at the same table. Yeah, that’s it. 
“Hurry up, I’m hungry.” 
You blinked in shock at his lack of resistance. 
“Yes. Now come on. I know a place with really great apple strudels.”
You weren’t aware that by ‘breakfast’, Jungkook actually meant sitting in complete silence and wolfing down food like your life depends on it. You want to be grossed out when he inhales 3 apple strudels in less than 10 minutes, crumbs flaking on his shirt without a care in the world. Yet you just feel endeared. The sight makes you smile. And maybe if Jungkook did not detest you, you would have leaned over and kissed the cinnamon sugar right off his lips. 
“So….”, you sip on a sweet coffee, “Jimin told me you’re going for a masters in art history?” 
Jungkook nods halfway through a bite of his pastry. “Yup.” 
“Is it something you’re really passionate about?” you inquire, desperately wanting the conversation to delve into something that wasn’t so surface level.
“Uh huh.”
“What are some other things you’re interested in besides art?”
Jungkook is completely clueless. He only spares glances to the windows and occasional looks to his oh so precious breakfast treats. You want to slap him and be angry, but you only sigh. It shouldn’t be so hard to talk to your soulmate, yet it felt like trying to pull teeth when he was so completely disinterested in you. You wonder if this is worth it.
You look up at him from your steaming cappuccino cup and use your wildcard. 
“In my opinion, Botticelli’s Birth of Venus did little for the Italian Renaissance movement.” 
Your statement almost has Jungkook falling backwards in his chair and choking on a piece of fruit filling, eyes growing as wide as saucers when he finally processes what you just said. A flaming insult to the entire art historian community. 
“What do you know about Botticelli?”, he sneers, and you internally celebrate for this is the most emotion Jungkook has shown since meeting you. 
“I know that his work supposedly epitomizes the spirit of the Renaissance”, you swirl the coffee in your cup nonchalantly, lips curving into a knowing smirk. “But if you ask me, Bellini’s San Giobbe Altarpiece did much more to encapsulate the values of 15th century Italy.” 
Jungkook’s speechless expression is one that you want to take a snapshot of and frame it to your wall. It is glorious, and arguably more artful to you than Botticelli himself. So what, you had conveniently forgot to mention to him about the class you took junior year of college, with a professor that made you engrave the fundamentals of Italian painting in your brain. It’s so much more gratifying to see him stunned silent. 
Across the table from you, Jungkook feels a warm smile itching to display itself. Before it can appear, he disguises it as a cold smirk. He feels something akin to a butterfly at the pit of his stomach, but blames it on indigestion and the inhuman pace at which he devoured his breakfast. Yeah that must be it. There was no way he was feeling butterflies. 
He cracks his knuckles, raises his cup to gulp down a lukewarm green tea, and rests his elbows on the table separating the both of you.
“I don’t suppose you could tell me your thoughts on the influences of neo-classicism in the 18th century?” 
“No, Y/N, turn to your left a little”, Jungkook frustratedly sighs behind the camera lens.
“Your left or my left?”
He pauses. “....left.” 
To any outside eye, you and Jungkook look like two buffoons trying to take pictures on what might possibly be the windiest day of the season, under the peach blossom trees. Jungkook had called you earlier that day and stressed about how he needed mixed media in his beloved portfolio, and photographs were the next topic of interest. Though you couldn’t understand why he couldn’t just set out a fruit bowl on his windowsill and call it still life photography.
Jungkook stares down at his camera, dissatisfaction clear on his face. You almost want to apologize for your abhorrent modeling skills but hey, he was the one that chose you. 
“Hmm...try staring at that boat in the distance”, he dictates, standing beside you and aiming the lens at your side profile. You do as he asks, but don’t hear the shutter of the camera. Jungkook sighs again and leans forward, so close you could feel his warm breath hitting your skin. You hope he doesn’t notice the beet blush on your cheeks.
Jungkook’s hands meet your chin when he uses it to slightly tilt your face downwards. He positions you in the way that he wants you to pose and you finally understand why photography is considered an art. Because it’s almost as if Jungkook is molding you like clay, to get the silhouette he wants to capture with his camera lens. The day is brisk, but his skin on your’s lights you on fire. 
“Okay, that’s…..that’s perfect”, Jungkook breathes, hurriedly picking up the camera that had been hanging onto his neck by the strap and angling it. At the moment his index finger presses down on the button, there is a gust of wind that surrounds the both of you.
The breeze loosens a strand of your hair and it falls into your eyes. You let your eyes drift close for a second, smiling into the cold air that tingles on your skin. Jungkook’s breath catches in his throat and he thanks the skies for the howling wind so you wouldn’t be able to hear his thumping heartbeat. But surely it’s only because it’s cold. And absolutely nothing else. Jungkook coughs inconspicuously to snap himself out of his trance, sighing in relief when he realizes your eyes are still closed and that you hadn’t noticed his internal struggle. 
He drags you to a bridge next and makes you lay on the cold wood to which you vehemently object before you remember that he’s paying you and that you want him to fall in love with you, not dislike you more than he already does. After the bridge, Jungkook makes you kneel beside the park pond and dip your hand in the icy water and you find yourself wanting to do the same thing to his precious camera. 
Before the two of you have realized, the sun sets into the horizon and tinges the sky in a combination of purples and pinks that Jungkook himself has a hard time replicating on canvas. He aims his lens at the clouds and takes a picture that he knows won’t make it into his gallery. He just felt the need to have something to remember this day by. For no reason in particular…
A buzzing coming from your coat pocket alerts you both of the time that has passed and how the sky has considerably darkened since you began the session. When you fish your phone out, Jimin’s contact photo is staring back at you while the marimba ringtone continues playing. You put the phone on speaker.
“Hey Jiminie”, you smile and Jungkook catches a glance of it. And the discomfort in his chest is definitely, 100%, not jealousy. Not at all.
“I told you not to call me that! What is with you younger people and your disrespect for the elderly?” The corner of Jungkook’s lips twitch into a subtle smile at the similarity of your’s and his conversations with Jimin. 
“Okay, okay, grandpa. What’s up?”
“Can you come home ASAP? I may or may not have broken the stove trying to make soup.” 
The redundancy of his confession makes you sigh, as Park Jimin desecrating your shared kitchen space was not a rare occurrence by any means. 
“I’ll be right there”, you chided through the line, “please do not cook anything else before I arrive.” 
“Thanks Y/N-ie, you’re the best!” Jimin’s voice is far too cheery and you make a mental note to nag him a little extra when you get home. The phone call is ended promptly and you turn around to Jungkook, eyes widening in surprise when he has already packed up all his photography gear. The sky had turned dark and the streetlights had been turned on to illuminate the park. If you had craned your neck upwards, you would have noticed the stars that awoke again to shine down upon the city. But you didn’t. You only saw the stars that were twinkling in Jungkook’s eyes. 
“Uh”, he stammers, “I’ll walk you home. It’s late.” 
“Oh! Uh...Thanks.” Though he was still cold and indifferent, your heart jumped in elation. Perhaps this could be considered baby steps. 
The trip home is quiet, only the sounds of your tandem footsteps on pavement and the rustle of a breeze through tree leaves fill the space of silence. But the quiet is not uncomfortable. Just a bit awkward as you two try to figure out how to be around one another. Jungkook’s hands are shoved in his pockets and your fingers itch to intertwine themselves around his own. To press your soulmate marks together and feel them calling out to each other. But you and Jungkook are anything but normal soulmates. For you are already head over heels in love with him and he is adamant on not sparing you a crumb of affection. 
To your disdain, the apartment was closer than you thought and the short walk with Jungkook ended before it really even began. You could practically hear Jimin’s impatience emanating from the third story of the building. 
“So I’ll see you later?”, you smile meekly. Jungkook readjusts the strap of his camera bag before nodding. He is walking away before you turn around to enter the apartment building and even though it was something small and mundane, you wished he would have waited to see you get in safely. You make your way inside, more downcast than you had been before.
You don’t see when Jungkook turns around. You don’t feel the reassurance that washes over him when the door shuts safely behind you. 
That night, Jungkook is reminded far too much of Yoojung. When he goes to make his usual chamomile, he finds her mug at the very back of the tea cabinet. She must have forgotten it when she packed up her stuff. When he spoons in the sugar, he remembers how Yoojung drinks her tea with honey instead. And when he feels himself start to fall apart, he remembers how Yoojung is not there to keep him together. 
Jungkook pushes away his pain, abandons the lukewarm mug of tea, and opts for an early bedtime to sleep away the ache. The camera sitting on his nightstand, though, beckons him to look over the photos you both had taken that afternoon. 
In the moment, he had been dissatisfied with the pictures, always thinking there must be a better angle or a better position you could shift into. However when he looks down at his camera now, in the quiet and solemnity of his bedroom, Jungkook can’t help but to think they are absolutely perfect. 
He doesn’t know whether to credit his own artistic skill or you; for breathing life into his photographs. It’s the lines of your hands, the slope of your nose, and the stray strands of your hair that makes his pictures more human. 
The ones he ends up picking though, are not perfectly  staged and not the ones where he made you change the position of your stance for 10 minutes. No, the best pictures were the ones he took without you noticing. When you had just been enjoying the cool breeze or admiring the beauty of peach blossom season. When you point out a cool looking bird and when you stared annoyedly past the cameras lens (at him no doubt). 
Yoojung is gone from his mind for just a tiny fleeting moment. For little reason at all, Jungkook finds himself smiling. And there is only the company of the moon to see it. 
 It is ten o’ clock in the morning and Jungkook comes to a realization that in the couple weeks since he has met you, he has sighed more times than he has in the past 23 years of life. Jungkook sighs when you text him first thing in the morning about the dream you had the night before and describe it in painfully vivid details. He leaves them unanswered. Sometimes he wished you would just email him the google document instead. He sighs when you fidget in your seat when he’s trying to paint and keep focus, but you are only interested in asking him the snacks he has in his fridge or when he’s going to finish. He sighs when you and Jimin collectively trash his art studio by spamming his $1,000 camera with ugly face pictures and sword fighting with his sable paint brushes. Jungkook often has a hard time believing that both of you are in graduate school. 
Today, he sighs when you bombard into room 62B of the art building; what is supposed to be Jungkook’s completely zen and peaceful creative space. You are tiptoeing around him as you always do, scared that you’ll do something to set him off and your soulmate will disown you for good. He glances at you once, eyes quickly darting back to the sculpture he is molding on the clay table and saying nothing. 
“There’s a new cafe that just opened right across from the apple strudel place”, you gulp tensely. “I was gonna go check out the competition.” Your words seem deaf to Jungkook’s ear and he only furrows his eyebrows, fingers fussing over the mass of clay. There was just something he couldn’t get right. He didn’t know what it was. 
Jungkook pushes away the sculpture frustratedly, wipes his hands on his apron, and finally looks at you. Maybe he did need a break and come back to it with fresh eyes. That’s all it was, though. A break. He wasn’t going because you asked him to. 
“They better have blonde roast otherwise you’ll be compensating me for my time.” Jungkook is as ruthless and blunt as ever and you decide to look past it as you always do. Him agreeing to go with you was a mini success. 
“Welcome in! You’ve stopped by at the perfect time. The strawberry scones have just been taken out of the oven!” The cafe employee is far too enthusiastic for receiving minimum wage and greeting grumpy people off the streets who just want to be caffeinated. His name tag reads Jung Hoseok. 
“Oh, strawberry is my favorite”, you whisper, the statement only meant for your ears but Jungkook picks up on it anyway. He declines to tell you that strawberry is his favorite as well. Hoseok’s eyes light up when you and Jungkook approach the entrance, like he finally succeeded at luring a customer. 
The cafe isn’t anything special. A bit more modern compared to the one across the street and you think you prefer the latter because this new one doesn’t have the owner’s handsome son standing at the cash register. He may not be your soulmate, but even you had to admit Kim Seokjin was a beautiful man if there ever was one. However, this cafe is warm and has ceiling length windows that let in an obscene amount of sunlight. Jungkook makes a mental note to try some pictures here in the future. 
Jungkook’s phone buzzes in his pocket and you are already leaving him behind in the dust, walking straight to the counter and peering up at the menu deep in thought. You turn around to see that he is immersed in mysterious conversation, and take it upon yourself to order him a drink. 
“I’ll have a matcha latte. And uh…”, you decide, trailing off as you wonder what kind of drink Jungkook would enjoy. “And an iced vanilla mocha latte, extra whipped cream, extra chocolate syrup. Do you guys have rainbow sprinkles?” 
A little sugar never hurt anyone. Especially someone so often bitter like your one and only soulmate. 
When Jungkook hangs up and makes his way to the corner table where you are situated, the sight of the concoction on the table is enough to give him an instant cavity. You hide your smile behind the mug of matcha. He grumbles and sits down swiftly, sticking the straw past his lips in defiance and you can only watch expectantly. 
“Well…do you like it?” 
This is when Jungkook realizes you didn’t order this to spite him. You just had completely zero idea what he liked and disliked and chose the first thing you thought was best. As cold as he is, he doesn’t have the heart to tell you that when he drinks coffee, he likes it black. No cream, no sugar, and the darkest roast with the most caffeine to push him through those nights spent in front of a canvas or over a clay table. 
Jungkook fights to keep steady from the ambush of sugar and wills himself to swallow it down. There is sticky chocolate syrup on his hands and it feels cosmically more uncomfortable than paint. But Jungkook manages to look up at you and nod, to which you reward with a smile. 
“I knew you would like it”, you say smugly, giving yourself a mental pat on the back. “You look like you have a giant sweet tooth.” There is a mellow giggle that follows your statement. Jungkook feels a flutter at the bottom of his stomach, and convinces himself it’s only because it sounds so much like Yoojung. He catches sight of the moon on your wrist, and pushes the feeling away even farther. 
The two of you spend the rest of the midday there, tucked away in a corner of a cafe and losing track of time as you always do. Jungkook finds himself forgetting about the mountains of work he has to do to finish his art gallery portfolio, and the unfinished sculpture back at the studio that’s just not right. 
Today, he allows himself to enjoy your presence and get to know you more. Your favorite color is yellow. You had a dog named Benny when you were a child. You detest beer with a passion, but enjoy a nightly glass of pinot grigio. Jungkook barely notices when the entire cup of coffee has disappeared. Every last rainbow sprinkle.
On second thought, he feels that maybe there was something sweeter than his unexpectedly delicious iced vanilla mocha latte with extra whipped cream. Maybe that something was sitting right across from him, rambling about the fundamentals of English literature with unexplained vigor. 
Jungkook’s soul feels lighter when he goes to bed that night. And when he finally succumbs to Morpheus, his last lucid thought is of you; sun beams coming from the large cafe windows that comb through your hair. He looks at you through his mind’s eye and all he can see is the potential heartbreak you have the power to put him through. The fan of your eyelashes. The curve of your smile. The plush of your lips. All he can see is Yoojung as she crushes his soul in her bare hands. 
Yet in the midst of his internal conflict, Jungkook’s subconscious allows him to fall in love with you a little bit. Perhaps not love just yet, but affection. Like a toe dip in uncharted waters or sticking his finger in a bowl of creamy cake batter just for a taste. The walls he has built are still there, strong as ever, but perhaps a couple bricks look a bit askew. He doesn’t know, but his soul calls out to your’s through the fortress.
“Y/N I don’t know why you thought this was a good idea.”
“Oh hush, just close your eyes and point where your heart tells you to.”
In the lobby of a train station, facing a map and an ETA board is where you and Jungkook will be embarking on your next “date but not really because you don’t believe in soulmates so let’s just hang out”. It had taken a good two hours of nagging and whining on your part to convince him to abandon his portfolio for just a little bit to go an outing. Now standing here, with you excitedly bouncing next to him and a mystery destination, Jungkook feels something akin to utter regret. 
“What if I choose somewhere that’s a thousand miles away? Or just in the middle of nowhere?”, Jungkook groans, still putting up an unbothered and cold front. 
“Well then we will go somewhere that’s a thousand miles away or in the middle of nowhere”, you quipped back at him. Jungkook had a feeling he wouldn’t be able to get out of this one. 
He reluctantly places a hand over his eyes, sighing with resignation before pointing to a random spot on the map. There is a giggle that sounds to his left and Jungkook finds himself wanting to hear more. 
“Wonderful choice”, you smiled, “couldn’t have picked it better myself.” 
Jungkook peeked his eyes open one at a time, scared of seeing what his intuition has chosen for your guys’ spontaneous destination. He breathes out a sigh of relief when he sees that his fingers landed on a town on the outskirts of the city, 20 minutes away from the university. He silently thanks the universe for not sabotaging his wallet and time. 
“We’re never doing this again, Y/N”, Jungkook speaks as you are in front of him, skipping happily to the front desk to buy two train tickets. 
“Wasn’t it fun, though? The thrill?”, you chuckle at his demeanor, to which he only shakes his head vehemently. You note the newest thing you’ve just learned about Jungkook: he has an aversion to uncertainty and spontaneity. 
The train ride was as brief as it was uneventful. You spent the time rambling to Jungkook about all the quips and quirks about yourself and he only listened. Though he kept quiet, his face was free of any annoyance or indication that you were speaking too much. Jungkook only stared at you and unknowing to you, he soaked in every bit of information like a sponge. If anyone asked, he could tell them what foods you were allergic to, what colors wash you out, and what vegetables you hated the most. 
“Wow you didn’t have to pick somewhere so far away, Jungkook.” You muse as the two of you step out of the train car. So far away in fact, that if you were to crane your head up enough, you would be able to see the university from a distance. 
“Hey, you were the one who made me choose”, Jungkook spares a rare smile, “Would you rather we have shelled out our wallets to go on an 18-hour train ride?”
“Okay, fair point.”
The city was as abundant as it was big, and the both of you walked aimlessly from avenue to avenue, stopping occasionally whenever you see a dog you just can’t help but to pet or whenever Jungkook complained about his sore feet. As cold and indifferent as Jungkook made himself out to be, you’ve quickly come to realize that he’s actually a big baby. He still hasn’t let you in or even lowered his walls by a tiny centimeter, but you like to think that even agreeing to go anywhere with you could be considered significant progress.
Jungkook doesn’t notice the pounding of his heart whenever his hands graze against your’s, walking side by side so close he can feel the heat emanating through your coat. He doesn’t notice the peace he feels, just the synchronicity of his feet as he places them on the pavement. 
The fraught wind that blows straight at Jungkook’s face prompts him to look up from where his eyes were cast on the ground. He almost staggers at how strong it is, but finds himself weak in the knees for a completely different reason.
Of course.
Of all the days, of all the times, of all the people in this entire city.
Of course she had to be the one that was currently staring at him from across the intersection. 
The red light seems to go on forever. Either that or time has just spontaneously frozen, Jungkook can’t tell. But his eyes are fixed on hers and his feet bolster him to the concrete when all he wants to do is sprint the other way and forget he ever saw this ghost from the past. 
Yoojung looks as beautiful as the day she left him. 
She’s gained some weight and her cheeks have filled out, but it looks healthy on her now (Jungkook always chided her for forgetting to eat). She stares at him with a combination of shock and guilt and something he wants to overthink into affection but he won’t give himself that satisfaction anymore. She dyed her hair. Light brown looks good on her. 
She looks...happy. As happy as anyone can look when they’re rushing through thick crowds of a city, traffic horns blaring like a dilapidated symphony. 
In the heat of it all, it’s impossible for you not to notice Jungkook’s sudden change in demeanor or the way he has suddenly stopped breathing. When you follow his gaze, there is a girl on the other side of the street that shares the same starstruck expression and even from the outside looking in, you can feel the weight of something painful in his eyes. In her stature. 
When the lights turn green, the throngs of city dwellers migrate across and you stay beside Jungkook when he doesn’t move a muscle. Not even a finger twitch. But she does. And he can only fight to keep the ache away when Yoojung gets closer with every millisecond. Until she is standing right in front of him and he can smell her familiar vanilla perfume. 
“Jungkook”, she speaks, apprehension in her voice. “It’s been a are you?” 
Yoojung only spares you a side glance while keeping attention on Jungkook and you only grow more curious as to who this strange woman is. 
He wants to speak so badly but his tongue remains frozen. He turns to you with flabbergast in his eyes and shakes his head to snap out of the daze of confusion. Of seeing the love of his life again. Or who he thought was the love of his life. 
“Could you give us a minute, Y/N?” 
You didn’t know why but the words that came from his lips made you feel disappointed. Perhaps you were just stupid for thinking he would introduce you. Tell her that you’re his soulmate and scream it at the top of his lungs with sheer pride. But your imagination has hurt you countless times and you had a feeling this one wouldn’t be the last. You manage a curt nod and push away the twinge in your heart. There was a boundary between you and Jungkook and today was not the day to cross it and introduce yourself as his soulmate to any random stranger. 
Once you are out of vicinity and have found solace in a bookstore 10 feet away, Jungkook allows himself to breathe in Yoojung’s presence. 
“I didn’t know if you were still in the city”, he falters, voice coming out quieter than he would have liked it to. But what was he supposed to sound like confronting the supposed love of his life. 
“I never left, entire life is here.” She sighs, smiling lightly with eyes seeping with guilt. 
He scoffs. “I don’t know Yoojung, you seem to leave behind important things pretty easily.” Jungkook feels himself getting angrier and resentful by the second, and though he knows it is unfair of him, Yoojung’s mere presence brings back all the wounds he never truly healed from. 
Granted, on a concrete sidewalk next to a traffic light pole was not the best place to have a heart to heart about failed relationships. But when has the universe ever given Jungkook the best things in life. He is devastatingly cynical for someone who dedicates his career to art. 
Yoojung wears a frown on her face, but there is no vindictiveness there. Just an overwhelming sense of remorse that Jungkook communicates as pity. 
“I don’t know how else to say that I’m sorry”, she sighs, eyes falling to the ground. Jungkook wishes it would just open up and swallow him whole. 
“Then don’t say anything.” He turns to walk away.
“Wait! Jungkook can we...can’t we catch up or something? For a couple minutes?” Yoojung is visibly desperate, and her hands are outstretched as if wanting to touch him but keeping herself from overstepping the line. 
Jungkook glances through the window of the bookstore, and you are situated on a chair, already nose deep in a hefty book. He wants to smile and tease you for being such a nerd, but the weight of Yoojung’s presence makes him reinforce those walls of indifference tenfold. 
He exhales frustration and inhales temptation, looking back into Yoojung’s familiar eyes and nodding. Jungkook walks to a nearby bench and sits down with no words exchanged, looking forward coldly even when he feels her warmth next to him. A couple months ago, Jungkook would have set all his canvases on fire to feel her beside him again. Now, he’s not so sure.
“So…”, she starts, “who’s that cute girl you were with?” 
“No one.” He shoots out a little too soon with no hesitation. Yoojung gulps.
“You know Jungkook, it’s okay to find someone. I-I know I hurt you, but I’m glad if you’ve found someone who doesn’t.” Jungkook doesn’t say anything so she continues.
“I’m really happy for-”
“I never really forgave you Yoojung.” He stares blankly at the passersby and tries to ignore the ache in his bones. The one that’s been there the day she left and took a piece of his heart with her. 
“And I don’t want to blame you for my decisions but I want you to know that I push away a lot of people because of you. People that don’t deserve it.” From the corner of his eye, he can see her nod solemnly to his words and fidget with her hands in her lap. Part of him feels guilty for unloading on Yoojung. Part of him feels like maybe he deserves to. 
“What you did was really shitty. Astronomically fucking shitty. And I’ve spent the past eternity hating you and maybe I still do, but…”, Jungkook takes a deep breath, “I want to forgive you now. If not fully, then partially. I hope you can understand that.” He finally tilts his head to look at her and though the smile on her face is as beautiful as he remembers it to be, Jungkook no longer feels the longing. No longer feels the sting that he usually does when his thoughts take him back to the years they spent together. 
Jungkook doesn’t want to call it closure, not yet anyway. Sitting here on the bench, he still wants to scream and yell and tell Yoojung of all the nights he’s spent alone since she left. He still wants to drag her back and wonder if she could love him again like she used to. 
But he doesn’t. He listens when she tells him about her new job and her new apartment right by the lakeside. They share snippets of their separate lives. Just deep enough to rekindle something warm but shallow enough to not invite anything else in. 
When he walks away from the bench and into the bookstore, Jungkook stills feels the walls that he has built around himself. He is still scared of opening up and being vulnerable but the anger held for Yoojung for so long is no longer a raging fire. More so a wickering flame. 
When he spots you, though, he remembers why he built those walls in the first place. He remembers how easy it used to be for him to climb a high peak and fall to his demise. Your eyes widen when you catch sight of him, lips curling into a wide smile and clear excitement in your expression. The book in your hands is tossed aside and tunnel vision reserved for him and him only. Something blooms in his chest and he can’t remember the last time someone’s been so elated to just simply see him...aside from his dog. Jungkook reminds himself to act uncaring. If he pretends long enough, he’ll start to believe it himself. 
The train ride home feels longer than the one there. The minutes drag by and perhaps it is because of your drooping eyes or the way Jungkook is looking at you with a different tenderness than he has been before. His stare is not harsh. It’s soft and sweet, but subtle enough for you to wonder if you are just imagining it. The night has always been unforgiving and cold even in the spring, but perhaps all that’s needed to breathe some warmth, is a 15 minute train ride and a wrist with a crescent moon.
Yet every time you become more smitten with Jungkook, there is a harsh reminder that follows you everywhere like a designated storm cloud. 
Jungkook does not love you. And you are trying and you will continue to try but his eyes tell you something he is too courteous to say. You see it now as he sits across from you and admires the skyline from the window. It makes you wonder if it is soulmates he doesn’t believe in, or if it is just you that he can’t bring himself to accept. With every cold glance and wall that he puts up, you start to convince yourself that it is the latter.
“We’re here, Y/N”, Jungkook speaks quietly, interrupting your drifting thoughts. He turns around and leaves the train car with hands tucked in his coat pocket. Did you expect him to escort you out and hold your hand? Of course not. But you were tired of Jungkook being so indifferent to your existence. 
You follow him glumly out the doors that slide close after you step through. Then it zips off again and you wonder where it would have taken you if you just stayed in your seat. If Jungkook would have even noticed that you hadn’t followed him when he left. 
You sigh into the night air and wish it was winter so that your breath could be visible as a white cloud. Maybe then Jungkook would notice that you were a living being beside him. 
“Who was that girl that we met back there?”, you murmur hesitantly. Jungkook nearly chokes on air. 
“No one”, he responds curtly, effectively cutting off the conversation then and there. It makes your heart sink. She must be important and all you want to do is know every single detail about their relationship, but the look in his eyes warn you to not pry. 
You don’t think you can forget the way Jungkook looked at her from across the street. Like he had been lost this whole time and she was the North star. You saw the way his eyes twinkled in the midday sun and sparkled even more when she came closer. You wonder if you’ll ever be able to have that effect on him. 
“Hey, next time you should pick a place you and I both do not live in”, you giggle, nudging his shoulder with your own. It makes him smile and even though your heart feels heavy in your chest, Jungkook looks so beautiful when he smiles. 
The two pair of feet subconsciously carry you both to the front door of your apartment building and the scene is too familiar from the last time. You expect him to turn around and whisper a hushed goodnight under his breath, and you’ll have to watch the back of his head disappear down the street. But he doesn’t. Just stands across from you quietly and waits for you to say something. So you do. 
“Jungkook, I’m sorry if I brought up something you didn’t want to remember. I don’t really know your story but it seems you two have a lot of history.” You want to tell him how hard it is for you to be his soulmate when he is so clearly vying for the warmth of someone else. Someone who didn’t have a crescent moon on her wrist. 
“I know you’ll tell me whenever you’re ready, and if that’s never then I’ll keep waiting until forever. But I’m here if you want to talk or unload and I already know I can help because…” you fidget with your hands and look around nervously. 
“Well, because I’m your soulmate.” 
When you say it loud and explicitly, Jungkook thought the statement would have made him recoil. But it doesn’t. It just seeps through his consciousness and feels warm when he thinks about the weight of those words. You are his soulmate, regardless of if he believes in such a thing or not. You carry the same mark as he does on your wrist and somehow, by some intangible factor, the universe had decided that you were created for him and he for you. 
And when he looks at you. Really looks at you. When Jungkook processes your sincere words and how you manage to deal with his insurmountable boundaries even when you barely know him…
Jungkook has never wanted to kiss you more. 
So he does. 
Your lips taste like mint chewing gum and the ghost of words you wish to tell him but can’t. He feels you stiffen until you completely melt in his hold, and Jungkook cradles your face with both his hands, pulling you closer to him until there is no barrier between you but the clothes on your back and the emotional distance. You feel so far away even when you’re this near. Was it a trick of your imagination when you felt the moon on your wrist tingling? 
It doesn’t last as long as you would’ve liked it to. Jungkook yanks his hands from you like your skin scalded him and takes several steps back. His chest rises up and down violently when his breath comes out ragged, posture stiffening as the gravity of what just happened finally absorbs. You’re there, he knows you’re there and standing in front of him. So why is it he can only see Yoojung. Yoojung and the star on her wrist and apologies on her lips. Yoojung and the tears in her eyes when she walks away. 
You can only stare confusedly when his body goes rigid, and a sudden coldness envelops you both. 
And in the haze of post-embrace, like any two normal lovers, you catch something in his eyes that sets a heavy feeling in your stomach. Before you can confirm if it’s just a trick of the light, Jungkook is already running in the opposite direction and you can only see a shadow of sullen love that follows him. He is gone and you are standing alone, wondering how moonlight could feel so cold even on a spring night. 
You don’t get any sleep that night. Every time you close your eyes, there is only the sight of Jungkook’s disgust and regret to lull you to dreams. 
20 minutes away from your apartment, there is a boy who doesn’t sleep either. He won’t text or call to tell you that he can’t shake off the feeling of your skin on his and your breath fanning his cheek. He won’t admit to himself that tonight, when he looked at you, he felt the possibility of falling in love. He won’t tell you that the moon on his skin longs to be traced by your hands. No, he just shares those secrets with his pillow as its linen soaks up his tears. 
In the midst of it all, there is one verdict that becomes clear to him.
Jungkook wishes he had never told Jimin he needed a muse.
The next three weeks is dedicated to trying to get in touch with your soulmate. Through the whirlwinds of utter confusion and desperation, you try texting, calling, emailing, even showing up at his art studio and apartment to no avail. It seemed he had a talent for avoiding soulmates. 
It hurt, to say the least. That he left you high and dry after giving you the most intense
kiss of your life and doesn’t even have the decency to let you know he’s alive. The feeling of his lips still burns on your skin and you wonder if you are a complete fool for being so smitten with a person who, quite possibly, hasn’t spared you a single thought after that night. You just want - no you just need some clarity. 
Jungkook makes you wait another week before replying. 
It is an impossibly sunny day when you wake up. Your neck is stiff from sleeping like a contortionist and your heart aches even more than your muscles with every passing morning with radio silence from your soulmate. You want to call him and tell him you’re sorry. That you’ll forget anything ever happened. It hurts to even think about it, but for Jungkook, you would go through a little more pain so he would let you into his life. 
Outside the hall, Jimin is singing along to a familiar melody of a song you don’t know the name of and judging by the aroma that wafts through the cracks of your door, he has successfully made a pot of coffee. He has been an anchor throughout this whole thing, and sometimes you make a secret wish to the stars that Jimin had been the one with a crescent moon on his wrist instead. Perhaps that way, you wouldn’t have to go through the agony of chasing love that is constantly sprinting away from you. 
Your phone lays on the bedside table and buzzes innocently to start the morning. When you reach over and scroll through notifications routinely, there is a name there that makes your heart pang. Makes you want to throw up and celebrate at the same time. A text from Jungkook. Your fingers shake as you open it. 
I no longer need a model for the portfolio. Thank you for your involvement. Compensation will be provided promptly. 
The day you met him, you already knew that Jungkook was cold. He never dawdled around a painful truth or toed the line between bluntness and sparing feelings. Jungkook spoke his mind, collateral damage be damned. But this is a different type of cold. This one feels more like dry ice on warm skin. Like the numbing chill of a fading hope. Like winter’s first snowfall when autumn had promised you it would forever stay. 
Phone in your hand and tears threatening to drip down your cheeks, you wish you would have waited a bit more before opening his text. Perhaps that way you could have spent the rest of your morning basking in the spring sun, drinking Jimin’s inevitably bad coffee, having hope that Jeon Jungkook would grow to care for you. Perhaps if you hadn’t opened it so soon, your soulmate would still seem in reach. 
Jimin’s mug nearly drops out of his hand when the door of your bedroom is slammed open. He flings it to the side when he notices your red-rimmed eyes and the shaking hands that clutch onto a cellphone. You scream and sob at the universe, at anyone, asking why it was you that had to experience the chaos of longing. Jimin was there to hold you, as he always is, and helplessly listen to the sound of your heart breaking once again by the hands of Jungkook.
Room 62B of the art building is a place you hope to never have to visit again. Though it’s walls contain memories of you and Jungkook, and the evenings navigating his gallery portfolio along with your convoluted relationship, the wallpaper bleeds with a longing ache. A yearning pain. And if those walls could talk, you don’t think you would want them to say anything at all. They would only murmur what you are slowly accepting to be true.
Jungkook, your soulmate, wants nothing to do with you. 
When you hesitantly rap on the door with a fisted hand, the sound of him rustling from inside makes you want to run the opposite direction. It opens before you get the chance to change your mind and the sight of him nearly takes your breath away. He is beautiful as he always is, hair ruffled and mussed from undoubtedly running his hands through it compulsively. His lips are pink from biting on them and the dark circles under his eyes tells you of the dreams he has deprived himself of. 
Jungkook is painfully gorgeous and painfully not yours. 
“Y/N...I sent you a text earlier.” His voice is saccharine but the words taste so bitter. 
“I know. I read it”, you murmur, shrinking in on yourself. 
“I....Can we talk, Jungkook?” 
His eyes dart around nervously at your question, chewing on his bottom lip and tapping the toe of his shoe as if he was impatient and you were bothering him. And you have known that simply being around Jungkook hurts but the light at the end of the tunnel only continues dwindling. 
You understand why he is acting so restless when your gaze drifts past him and into the room. There is a girl perched on a stool, across from a canvas and easel that you know awfully well. You don’t recognize her but it’s only in your nature to begin comparing every aspect of yourself to this stranger. She sits on her hands and swings her legs back and forth, head in the clouds and eyes trailing the ceiling. She isn’t aware of the weight of her presence in the studio, nor the turmoil she has brought to you, who is standing just outside the door. 
The oxygen in the hallway thins and the breath you’ve been waiting to release since knocking catches in your throat. Coming here, you prepared yourself for a long and inevitably heart-wrenching talk with your soulmate. But you hadn’t prepared for the possibility that he had replaced you overnight. 
The only thought that blares through your mind is that this is your fault. For letting yourself think you were worth more to Jeon Jungkook than any other stranger. You can no longer find it in yourself to be angry at him. Just yourself. 
“You…”, you gulp down a whimper, “you replaced me.” 
Jungkook follows your vacant stare past him and sighs, realizing you had most likely deducted what this scene looked like. You would be right. Between the weeks of trying to understand what you were to him and the impending due date of the portfolio, Jungkook was sure the best way to move past this confusion was to just speed full steam ahead. That meant finding another muse. You were no longer an option.
You only stare down at the floor, but Jungkook begins speaking anyway. 
“Y/N, I…I’m sorry.” You scoff at his words, feigning anger when inside, you truly didn’t know if you could piece yourself back together this time. 
“Look, Y/N. It’s not you. It’s just that…”, he breathes deep, not knowing why it was so hard to say. “I’ve stopped believing soulmates were truly a thing a long time ago. I’m sorry.” 
It’s not the first time you’ve heard these words but it doesn’t mean they hurt any less.
“I didn’t want to initiate anything, Y/N, but you did and I let you and that was my fault to let anything start. I shouldn’t have when I knew nothing would come of it.”
It was a fault to him. It never should have happened. 
“So you just thought you would kiss me and decide that I meant nothing to you afterwards?”
“It was a mistake.” It was painful to think it but when you hear Jungkook say it, you experience a new kind of ache. A humorless chuckle bubbles past your throat.
 “I really thought you would grow to love me. Now I know it’s not your fault that I’m a complete fool. To fall head over heels for my soulmate who wishes he had never even met me. Much less share a mark.” 
You can see Jungkook’s eyes widen at your confession, but you can’t find it in yourself to care. It was the truth. He deserved to hear it. 
“You shouldn’t. You can’t.” He reaches up to pull at his hair frustratedly.
“Can’t what, Jungkook? Love you? You think I want to be in love with someone who wishes I didn’t exist?” You hate your voice for breaking, but its impossibly painful when he does nothing to deny your statement. 
“What do you want me to say, Y/N? What can I say to make this better?”
Try: I love you too.
“I don’t need you to say anything you don’t mean, Jungkook.” 
“Then shouldn’t you leave?”
Jeon Jungkook is cruel even when he doesn’t mean to be. There is oblivion in his gaze, and his question is one of genuine curiosity. But it still stabs you exactly where your heart is most tender. Yes, I should have left. 
“I guess I thought you were worth the pain, Jungkook. When you pushed me away and wanted nothing to do with me, I thought you were worth hurting for just to try a little more. Worth the uncertainty of being around you but never getting to actually be with you”, you numbly mutter, uncaring about the rivulets of tears down your face. Not like it wasn’t something he’s never seen before. There is more to come on the tip of your tongue, and Jungkook stays quiet to let you speak. There is conflict in his vision, but you don’t want to give yourself the false hope that he cares for you. 
Look where that has gotten you before. 
“You still are, you know. Worth it.” You release a shaky breath. “But I was stupid to think that I am too.”
Saying the words are revelation for you as much as it is for him. All this time, you’ve been running away from the truth in the pursuit of your soulmate. You hadn’t realized that the chase led you astray. 
“And I know that loving me is not easy. I’m…”, you force the words out so he can at least hear your turmoil by his hands. “I’m never really good enough for anyone. Why did I expect that I would be good enough for you?” 
Jungkook’s expression crumples into a frown. “Y/N, no, that’s not what I mean-”
“You don’t have to tell me what you mean, Jungkook. I meet you and the first thing you say is that you don’t believe in such a thing. I try to get close to you and all you know to do is push me away. And I try so hard to be enough but how can I when Yoojung still has your heart? So you don’t have to say it. I know what you mean.” You’ve stopped crying but the ache relents, and you can only look desperately at the boy who’s slipping from your grasp with every passing second. 
“I’m sorry.” The message is redundant.
“I can’t…” Rip off the bandaid. 
“I just can’t love you.”
The words make their way past his lips before he can stop them, and they shoot through your core ruthlessly. A sharpened dagger to soft flesh. It manifests itself in a physical pain that reverberates across your chest, and when the last strength left in you is used to stare at Jungkook through a pained and teary gaze, you are deaf to everything but those four words.
I can’t love you.
I can’t love you. 
I can’t love you. 
You’re not sure what he is sorry for at this point. If Jungkook is apologizing for not loving you, you don’t blame him. If he is sorry for entertaining the possibility, you don’t blame him. If he is sorry that you are the one with a crescent moon on your wrist, don’t blame him either. All your life you cherished it like some kind of gift from the universe. Now, nursing your crumbling soul in front of Jungkook, you wish it had never appeared in the first place. 
You shake your head, tucking your lip in between your teeth to stop the sob in your chest from escaping. Through the crack of the door Jungkook hadn’t shut fully, the girl was still there, patiently sitting where you were supposed to and making herself scarce after inevitably hearing you bare your heart to a boy who had no interest in it. 
Humiliation goes hand in hand with heartbreak, and the embarrassment that comes with confessing your love and insecurity urges your feet to run home. But even you cannot deprive yourself of looking at him one more time. 
His wavy head of hair. The scar on his cheekbone that makes him look even more beautiful, if that were possible. The gloss in his dark brown eyes, and the way he looks at you through stone cold walls. You commit it to memory, however painful, before you walk out of his life. 
“Be happy, Jungkook.” 
You truly mean it. 
 The sound of your footsteps getting farther away from him is a sound Jungkook thinks he’ll remember for a long time. It almost prompts him to run after you, cradle you to his chest, and profess how sorry he is again and again until you can truly feel the sincerity. But he doesn’t. Only remains behind the self-procured walls and watches when your figure disappears down the hallway. 
Cold. Unbothered. Indifferent. That’s what he had always told himself when it came to you. But the hallway feels so lonely and the ghost of your presence feels even lonelier, and Jungkook wonders if he had been wrong. 
He walks back into the studio, permanent frown on his face and shoulders hunched over in stress. The paintbrush feels like a stranger rather than an extension of his arm, as it always does, but Jungkook begins painting anyway. Looking at the girl in front of him, he is reminded of the look on your face when you realized he had replaced you completely in the span of three weeks, without even giving you a notice. Her presence in his art studio suddenly feels entirely suffocating. 
“Mina, Get out.” 
“Get out of my studio. I don’t need you as a model, anymore. Thanks.” His voice cut through the tension of the room, like a hot knife to butter. He recognizes it as the voice he always forces himself to use around you, and grows even more aggravated. 
The girl scoffs annoyedly, snatching her handbag from the floor and rushing out of the room. Obviously she had thought something more was to come from Jungkook’s art arrangement. He made sure to let her know that was not the case. 
There is a gnawing in his chest. Deep and subtle, but it becomes more prominent as the window view from his studio turns from blue to black. He ponders about spending the night in here, instead of going home to his bedroom where he is forced to consult with the agony of solitude. On top of everything today, Jungkook doesn’t think he can handle that. 
Every time he closes his eyes, he sees the pain in your face when he tells you that he can’t love you and he hears the shaking in your voice when you tell him the things that weighed on your soul. He thought the word “wither” was only reserved for flowers. Jungkook didn’t realize a person could wither until he saw it right in front of him. 
In truth, he didn’t know. He didn’t know if he could love you or not. And to Jungkook, that was already a feat in itself. He’s spent so many months convincing himself that his emotional fortress was impregnable. So many nights over whiskey bottles telling himself that love was only for fools and pretenders. To be uncertain about love, now, well...that’s something he is not yet ready to admit to himself. Much less admit to you. But letting you any closer was a fatal game. 
Being uncertain about love means being uncertain about getting hurt. Jungkook has a feeling he wouldn’t make it out in one piece if his heart fell into wrong hands. 
He does end up returning to his apartment that night. But the walk feels far too long and the air feels far too frigid, or perhaps is it because he can’t hear the tread of your footsteps beside him? 
Whatever the reason, tonight feels more lonely.
The stars tell him it’s because he does not like the person he’s alone with. 
Back in room 62B, there is an abandoned painting on a rickety easel. He hadn’t even had the will to wash out his paintbrush, and he’s sure he’ll pay for it the next day. Looking at the piece now, his professor would tell him that there’s too many colors. Too much contrast and nearly not enough depth in his strokes. But what was he to do when he had kicked out his new model and couldn’t get the image of your visible heartbreak out of his brain? 
A familiar wrist with a quaint crescent moon sits on the canvas, and he sure as hell didn’t use Mina as the inspiration. Jungkook reminds himself to throw out the painting tomorrow morning. 
The grease on Jimin’s skillet pan is always so hard to clean. The dish soap never truly cuts through the oil, and no matter how much you rinse it over with scalding water, it still feels soiled. On a normal day, it wouldn’t frustrate you so much. Today, a month-and-a-half after your soulmate made it clear to you that you had no place in his life, you want to throw the pan out the window and cry on the kitchen floor until it collapses with the weight of your tears. 
You settle for throwing down the sponge and making Jimin wash his own dishes.
The phone-that you usually now tend to ignore-buzzes on the counter, and you groan at your complete lack of desire to answer it. But the screen lights up with your roommate’s name and you hit the green button. 
“Y/N! How are you feeling, lovebug?” Jimin’s cheerful tone on speakerphone makes you want to cry. You can only imagine how terrible it is for him to be your roommate when all you know how to do now is mope and cry about a boy who probably hasn’t thought about you since. But he’s been holding you through all your breakdowns, and even sets up the air mattress on the floor of your bedroom when some nights are a little bit harder than most. 
“I’ve had better days”, you glare at the pan in the sink. “What’s up?’
“So I have a friend…”
“Jimin, no.” 
He sighs over the phone understandingly, but still not satisfied. “I know it’s only been a month Y/N, but it doesn’t have to be anything. He’s not looking for anything serious either. But maybe it would be good for you to take your mind off things.” 
It’s been a month. Four weeks. Roughly 31 days, and you still remember every word he said to you in the hallway of the art building. Every pause and quiver of his breath, and the way he looked so completely indifferent to your pain. Was one month enough for you to let go even after finding out Jungkook never planned to hold on in the first place?
“Look, you don’t have to decide now. I’m sorry for pushing you if you’re not ready.” His mumbling is apologetic and it makes you realize that Jimin genuinely means well. Maybe you weren’t ready to move on from Jungkook yet. Maybe you never will be. He was your damn soulmate, after all. But maybe a distraction couldn’t hurt.
“I’ll do it.” 
You can practically feel him smiling like an idiot over the phone. “Really?!” You sigh into the speaker and Jimin knows better to continue talking before you change your mind.
“His name is Namjoon, he works with me at the office. Super cute. Super hot. Super smart. Checks all your boxes!”, he rambles on about the nitty gritty details and though a part you is proud that you’re making the decision to move on with life, you can’t help but to realize that no one will ever be able to “check all your boxes”.
Not if they’re not Jungkook. 
“He sounds great, Jimin.” Anyone can tell your happiness is disingenuous, even through the phone. Jimin tells you that he had already planned a date (without your knowledge), and sends you on your way with a quick goodbye when his taxi arrives. The silence of the apartment after the conversation leaves you feeling even more weighted, but hopeful for the possibility of a distraction. You had a feeling you won’t be able to forget the likes of Jeon Jungkook if you tried. But, if only for a night, you were to forget the pain of loving him, you’ll take that chance. 
“What do you mean they all ‘feel the same’?” Jungkook is exasperated. He had drafted a complete version of his portfolio, working through the nights by the sweat of his brow. Now his professor was telling him that all his pieces felt the same and Jungkook thinks he might commit arson to the art studio.
Professor Sejin sighs contemplatively, taking off his glasses and throwing them on the table, all too familiar with Jungkook’s periodic art tantrums. 
“I mean that your pieces lack any variegation. The portfolio is well done and coherent, but the completed package is one-noted. It’s consistent. But too much so.”
Professor Sejin’s words make him fall back into the chair dejectedly, shoulders slumped and disappointment in his eyes at the critique of his art. Though it is hard to hear, Jungkook always welcomes productive criticism. The older man sympathizes with his downcast eyes and the visible stress on his back. 
“Look, Jungkook”, he affirms sincerely, “you just need to find some dynamic. Something to make people know that you can do more than one tone of art.” It’s obvious that the professor has a soft spot for the boy in front of him, who looks like his entire world is collapsing. The portfolio folder is handed back to him and Jungkook has the urge to burn it and not hear the word “gallery” again in the next decade. 
“I have faith in you. You’ll figure out what it is that you’re missing.” The smile on the man’s face is congenial. Genuine. And even though he has an ambitious amount of work to do, Jungkook finds the will to nod, haul himself off the office chair, and begin the trek back to his studio. 
The pinnacle of spring is approaching and the sun shines brighter with each morning. Not that he would know or care. He’s spent the last month locking himself inside, dedicating every fluid ounce of energy towards completing his project. It’s been surprisingly easier, and Jungkook finds himself finishing paintings, sketches, and sculptures with ease. Like untapped inspiration had revealed itself to him suddenly. Yet it still wasn’t least not according to Professor Sejin. 
Headphones drown out the cacophony of hustlers and bustlers with the laughter of children as accompaniment. He doesn’t allow himself to enjoy the music of the city. Not anymore. It gives him too much space to think, and Jungkook has a feeling that’s not good for anyone and definitely not good for him. 
The sight of a familiar bakery with particularly delicious apple strudels is enough to stop him in his rush, feet winding down until he is standing outside, staring at the door and wondering if he could go in without being reminded of you. Well, it might be too late for that anyhow, but further signs of protest are halted when he hears his growling stomach. 
Jungkook had morbidly underestimated your presence in the memory of his favorite cafe. You are everywhere. He sees your smiling face when he looks up at the chalkboard menu, soul vying for you to be next to him and excitedly choosing a new fru-fru drink that would undoubtedly have excessive sugar. He hears your giggles ruminating through the cafe while the other patrons only hear the music over loudspeaker. He practically feels you near, but that doesn’t matter now. It’s better this way. No one gets hurt this way. 
Jungkook plops himself at a corner table and buries his face in his hands, fingertips soothing over his pulsing eyebags and wrinkles he’s gotten from sleep deprivation. He desperately needs an espresso shot. Or five. 
“Hey…”, a voice makes him snap his head up. Jungkook recognizes the stranger as the owner’s son, who always stands guard at the cash register. The tag on his lapel reads Kim Seokjin, and Jungkook has a distant memory of you gushing over how nice Seokjin’s hair was. He had acted unbothered back then, but Jungkook would die before telling a soul that he was annoyed and jealous when you thought the cashier was cute. 
“Jungkook, right?”. He has a kind smile and a natural air of invitation. Jungkook nods. 
“I’ve seen you around a lot. Where’s that girl you always come here with?”
“I don’t see how that’s any of your business”, he nearly hisses, antsy at the mere mention of you. He instantly regrets it though. Seokjin looks like he’s been cornered with a blunt weapon, and it makes Jungkook sigh at his own asshole-ishness. 
“I’m sorry”, he mumbles, “just not a good day. At all.” 
There is a pause and hesitation before the boy speaks. “Do you...wanna talk about it?” Seokjin’s question is met with silence. 
There is a predictability about Jeon Jungkook. He doesn’t open himself up to anyone. He pretends that he doesn’t have problems so well, people start to become convinced. He avoids new connections like it’s the plague. But there is something so idiosyncratic about Kim Seokjin that makes him want to talk. Makes him want to trust a complete stranger. 
So Jungkook nods, depositing his black backpack besides him and lets himself breathe deep. 
“Her name is Y/N….”
In the lukewarm air of the café, Jungkook tells Seokjin about you. About the tiny crescent moon on your wrist that identically matches his - even unwraps his cloth to show it - and how he pushed you away hard enough to put an ocean’s worth of distance between the two of you. He tells Seokjin about Yoojung and the stars on her skin that have been plaguing him since the day she left. He tells him about that damn portfolio that refuses to be finished; one that he apparently has to start over because Professor goddamn Sejin says it's too boring. He allows himself to unload, and wow is it easier to breathe when you talk about your feelings. Jungkook reminds himself to do that more often. 
The “conversation” seems to stretch for hours (if a conversation can be considered one person unleashing all their hidden baggage on the other while they sit in silence). Jin listens intently through the entire ordeal, offering occasional nods and encouragement for him to continue. When Jungkook finally finishes with a deep breath, falling back on the chair looking completely worn out, Jin fixes him with a hot tea before speaking.
“The portfolio is important to you, Jungkook. If it’s important to you, you’ll find a way. Something tells me that you’re not one to give up so easily”, he quips with a playful lilt in his voice. Jin’s genuine faith in him makes Jungkook believe in himself.
“And as for Yoojung, well, I can’t speak on your pain. You are the only one that narrates your experiences but as much as she seems like a villain in your story, perhaps she has opened a door.” Jungkook thinks his voice sounds far too wise to be coming from a guy in his 20’s.
“Would you have known how to nurse a broken heart had it not been for her? I’m sorry she did that to you, Jungkook, but..Yoojung is your past. And I see so much in your future.” 
Jungkook only stares into the abyss of his tea cup. The reflection that stares back is someone he desperately wants to learn to love. When he looks up again, there is a sad glimmer in Seokjin’s gaze. Something so despondent that he feels second-hand pain. 
Jin pulls up the sleeve of his knit sweater. On his wrist sits a faded marigold, so blanched it almost blends in with his skin and makes him wonder if it will just disappear one day. Jungkook feels his blood run cold.
“It’s been two years since she died”, he stares solemnly at his skin, “I don’t think a day has gone by that I haven’t thought about her.” 
Jungkook’s thought about his soulmate mark disappearing before. Even hoped and prayed for it the days after Yoojung left. But now, when he sees it up close on Seokjin’s wrist, Jungkook doesn’t want to wish that loneliness upon anyone. 
“She was so damn...persistent”, Jin laughs, fondness dripping in every word. “Like your Y/N in that way, I suppose. She had a goal and was hell-bent on achieving it. She was so kind and strong and much more of a badass than I could ever be. I loved that about her.” There is sorrow in his voice when he uses the past tense, and Jungkook feels even worse for pouring his heart out about his very alive soulmate. 
“She was studying to be a doctor, you know? Ironic that even the best doctors couldn’t have saved her in the end.” His sentence trails off and he loses focus gazing out the window, fidgeting with the ring on his left hand with a faraway look in his eyes. 
“I don’t mean to ramble about my dead soulmate for no reason, Jungkook. And I’m in no position to tell you what you should or should not do regarding Y/N. But if I could restart this life with my soulmate, there wouldn’t be one second I would waste not at her side.” Jin’s tone is not accusatory or convicting. Just honest.
“It’s normal to be scared and apprehensive. Hell, I would be more concerned if you weren’t going into it with a shit ton of skepticism. I was terrified. Yet out of the billions of people that could’ve had my mark on their wrist, just knowing that she was that one was enough for me to love her.”
The cup of tea has long gone cold. Jungkook only manages to stare at the mahogany table, thoughts too heavy to voice aloud, so Jin continues. 
“I think I would give anything to know that such a person still exists for me. Someone out there that was chosen by an unknown, cosmic force for an unexplainable reason just for me. To see a mark that matches my own. Well…”, Jin breathes deeply, tears welling in his eyes but not falling, “I think that must be the most wonderful thing in the entire world.”
Seokjin’s words stick with him long after he has departed from the café. Long after the tea has settled in his stomach along with the weight of what a soulmate means to this stranger whose life story he has learned in the course of an evening. 
Even so, Jungkook’s not sure what he should feel. The fear of vulnerability still feels like a designated thundercloud above his head, and the thought of letting you past his walls makes Jungkook want to run the other way.
At the same time, the trepidation doesn’t feel so heavy anymore. It’s still there, and he can’t pinpoint exactly what happened but when he sees your smiling face behind his eyelids, Jungkook doesn’t feel scared. When he focuses on what you look like under sunlight, or your eyes staring at him through a camera lens, there is no fear of the broken heart you could leave him with. Just something warm. Something that feels an awful lot
 But what does Jungkook know about such things? 
He shrugs it off his shoulders, and readies himself for a night of inevitably restless sleep. He blames it on the impending due date of his beloved portfolio, but really, it is you. You and your insistence on trying every single coffee shop in the city. You and your convoluted idea of a date; letting your partner choose the location with their eyes closed. You and…
Just everything about you. 
He falls asleep well into 4am. The thin strap of cloth sits on his bedside table. Even if it is only for the night sky to see, Jungkook lets his soulmate mark breathe. 
It’s been so long since you’ve dressed up or cleaned up to go out anywhere, the reflection that stares back feels like a stranger. You’ve opted for a bold red lip, meticulously applying your makeup so that even the wing of your eyeliner was sharp enough to kill. Jimin forced you to curl your hair too, of course. The girl in the mirror looks beautiful. You know that she is beautiful.
So why is it that you can only see the face that is not enough for Jeon Jungkook? A person that he is unable to love. No, not even foundation can cover the face of longing.
“Y/N”, Jimin sing-songs, “hurry! You don’t wanna be late do you?” No, you don’t want to be late. You want to not go. Maybe retreat to your bedroom and cry the night away again. But you won’t tell him that when he is so clearly ecstatic that you’re spending a night out for the first time in months. 
The restaurant looks like it is entirely out of your budget. Well, you reckon any restaurant is out of your budget with all the debt that looms overhead and your painfully apparent unemployment. Waiting for Namjoon is less than exhilarating, and you spend the time fiddling with your bracelet that conveniently covers the crescent moon. These days, you can’t bear to look at it anymore. Your eyes are glued to the little mark, before a voice sounds from across the table.
“Sorry I’m late, traffic was insane. You must be Y/N, nice to meet you.” You weren’t sure what you expected Kim Namjoon to look like but were pleasantly surprised. Namjoon looks like he takes care of himself, neat and clean and sporting a very shiny watch that looks like 4 months’ worth of rent. 
“And you must be Namjoon. Likewise.” 
When he pulls out the chair to sit down, you can’t help but to notice the cloud on his wrist. It was smaller than yours but you had no doubt it felt just as heavy. If Namjoon felt your gaze on his skin, he did nothing to show it. 
“Hey, I know I just got here but…”, he sighs and takes a look around the room, “do you wanna get out of here? Find the cheapest and greasiest food we can?” His request makes you smile, and you grab the purse that rested on the table. 
“Namjoon, I think that’s the best idea you’ve had yet.” 
You and Namjoon manage to find a diner that wasn’t far from the fancy restaurant, and you thank the skies that you didn’t have to pay $50 for a salad tonight. Just some pocket change for quite possibly the best and oiliest hamburger you’ve ever had. 
By conversation that happens through mouthfuls of food and faces smeared with milkshake residue, you come to learn that Namjoon is an unsurprisingly nice guy. He studies poetry, but is working as a secretary at an office, hence his connection to Jimin. He loves to garden and talks about his bonsai plants to you like they’re his kids, even pulling up pictures on his phone and gazing down at them fondly. It makes you smile. He plays the piano, and likes to take long bike rides when the weather permits. 
It’s nice to have someone reciprocate your effort. It’s something you haven’t experienced in a long time, all credit to one Jeon Jungkook. Namjoon is warm in all the corners where Jungkook is cold. 
In a word, he is pretty damn perfect. And if he had a crescent moon on his wrist, you probably wouldn’t bat an eye or have a lick of doubt in the universe. He encompasses everything you want, so alike you in so many aspects it makes you wary. If Namjoon had your matching soulmate mark, you would already be in love with him. 
But he doesn’t. And that thought alone keeps you from feeling anything but platonicity. He is not Jungkook. You don’t think anyone can make you feel the way Jungkook does. You want to curse the stars for making this so. 
It’s well into the night, and you both remain planted in the diner booth, chatting and chuckling over a plate of french fries. It’s when you drift off while he’s talking about his latest attempt at focaccia that Namjoon sighs and sits back in the seat. 
“What?”, you confusedly ask after he suddenly stops speaking.
He smiles. Stays silent for a couple seconds. Then speaks. 
“So what did your soulmate do to you?”
His question catches you off guard and you can only stare at him, frown on your face and words lost on your tongue. 
“You’ve been staring into space every 5 minutes this whole night, and fidgeting with your bracelet so much I’m surprised it hasn’t fallen off”, he explains, tenderness and sympathy in his tone. 
“Every time I speak, you have this sad look in your eyes and I have a feeling you’re imagining someone else’s face, Y/N. I’ve enjoyed talking to you...a lot. But I can tell you want to be somewhere else so”, Namjoon places his elbows on the table and gazes at you endearingly, “tell me about your soulmate.” 
You stare at Namjoon through shocked eyes, glistening with the onset of tears that you manage to keep from escaping. Gosh, you were pathetic. Already wanting to cry at the mere mention of him. Or maybe the fact that someone could see through your facade. You take a deep breath. 
“His name is Jeon Jungkook.” Your voice quivers, and Namjoon continues listening intently. You are reluctant to continue because you know that once this conversation begins, there is a chance you might have to confront yourself again with the pain of loving someone who doesn’t want love. You internally apologize to Namjoon in advance, for you might cry on this first date. 
“I…I’m completely head over heels in love with him  but after everything, I’m not sure I have the slightest clue what love is. Because what sane person can fall in love with a person who has made it clear that that love wouldn’t be reciprocated from the get go?”
You fiddle with the plastic straw in your milkshake, searching for the courage to go on and tell him about every thought that you have denied yourself the satisfaction of verbalizing. 
“He loves apple strudels, you know. Eats them every time like they’re the last apple strudels he’ll ever have and he doesn’t give a damn who’s watching”, you chuckle, gaze drifting off to space. There is a fondness in your eyes as you speak, and Namjoon does not miss it. 
“He’s as punctual as the day is long. One time I was late to a photoshoot and he almost made me cry lecturing me about the importance of being on time. But now I’m never late.” 
The memory makes you, as well as Namjoon, smile. 
“He paints like his life depends on it, and he’ll get oil paint on his face without noticing and sometimes I just want to reach out and wipe it off. But I think he’d murder me on the spot.”
“How come?”, Namjoon offers his first words in the midst of your monologue. You’re not sure what to say next. 
“Well...I think Jeon Jungkook might be the coldest person I’ve ever met”, you dejectedly sigh. Reality tastes bitter even with remnants of whipped cream on your lips. 
“Every time I was around him, it felt like I was willingly breaking my own heart just for the chance to know that he was next to me. That in this entire world of billions of people, the one with the same moon on their wrist was next to me. And...I guess I didn’t really need him to love me yet”, your gaze locks onto Namjoon and you find he is already staring at you with utmost curiosity and subtle pity. 
“Jungkook alone was enough. I just wish he could have felt the same about me.” 
Perhaps the reason why the truth is so painful to speak is because people have a tendency to run from it. Then when it catches up to you, it’s a harsh trip and fall to the rocky ground. There is no cushion when you land. 
Namjoon doesn’t offer advice. Doesn’t dish his own experiences to relate to your own or even make any comments from his perspective. He just sits and listens in silence, but it doesn’t feel like he is disregarding you. No, his eyes tell you that he soaks in every word. You hope you’ll get the chance to do the same for him...if he ever decides to share his story with you. 
The two of you leave the diner with a prospective to be friends, and no plans of a future second date. You had a strong feeling that spending the entire evening talking about your unrequited soulmate love had something to do with that. Nevertheless, though Namjoon didn’t work out as a distraction, you were glad to have met him. It made you realize something.
Even if Jimin thought you were ready to move on. Even if you thought you were ready to forget. It might be a lifetime before you finally let go of that boy.
The morning reeks of rain and dew, humidity nearly clawing its way through his window and turning his apartment into a swamp. When he wakes up, it is not to his blaring alarm clock, but the uncomfortable sensation of a sweaty shirt sticking to his back. Jungkook groans, already tired of this day. It seems hopeless from the beginning. 
As much as he wanted to stay home and crank up the air conditioner so much that his landlord would come running, Professor Sejin’s voice reverberates through his eardrums.
You art is too one-noted, Jungkook.
Be better, Jungkook.
You’re talentless and will never succeed, Jungkook. 
Of course, these are not Professor Sejin’s verbatim, more so Jungkook’s own mind that twists his teacher’s constructive criticism into something else. He is a master at feeding his insecurity.
Jungkook chugs down a lukewarm cup of black coffee, and his stomach growls for something with a little more sugar and maybe a dash of rainbow colored sprinkles. He guesses he has you to thank for that. The art studio is always a daily destination, and this day is no different. Jungkook has a plan to dedicate himself to fixing his portfolio and maybe finish that clay piece he never got around to. 
The studio is too cold for his liking; Jungkook can’t remember how many times he has begged the superintendent to lower the AC. The cold he can deal with. The loneliness, however, is a different story. Jungkook is always alone. Alone when he’s in his apartment. Alone when he’s in class. Alone when he’s in the art room. These days, aloneness feels more haunting when he knows he had the option to escape it, but chose to stay. A part of him is ready to admit that it’s because of you. 
Jungkook hums a random melody that had been stuck in his head since the morning, fingers gliding over the slick sculpting clay. The days are easier now. He doesn’t think about you so much when the sun is out and there is the bustling of the busy city to distract him. The nights, however, are just as difficult as they have been. Jungkook’s last drifting thought is of you, and your face torturously carries over to each dream. Like his entire being misses you but he refuses to accept it. 
He takes a deep sigh in relief once the sculpture feels finished. Professor Sejin wanted something more dynamic, so there: his very own realist clay piece drawing inspiration from Praxiteles’ sculpture of Aphrodite. He sits back in pride, admiring his own handiwork and giving himself a mental pat on the back. It looks great. Perfect even. It looks….
It looks like you. 
Jungkook pales at the realization as the clay face stares back at him. No, this was supposed to be Aphrodite, the goddess of beauty and love, inspired by the ancient Greek artist that sculpted her. Then why does she have your nose? Those eyes are definitely your’s and even those cheeks are identical. Jungkook hadn’t even realized that in the rhythm of his art, he got lost and accidentally sculpted your face instead. 
He walks away from the clay table and hurriedly yanks off the soiled apron around his waist, confusion swimming in every cell of his body. How had he just...made a sculpture of you? With no knowledge that he was doing it?
Jungkook leans with his back against the sink, staring down at the floor with furrowed brows and a thundering heart. With a sudden epiphany, Jungkook leaps from his position and pulls out all the canvases, printed photographs, graphite drawings, and clay pieces he’s made for the past few months. Everything he can grab in the small studio space. 
It is then that he comes to the daunting realization:
Holy shit.
Professor Sejin was right.
 Everything feels the same. His whole portfolio has one note and no dynamic or diversity because...well, because all of his pieces are of you. Not you, necessarily, but your breath has come alive on his art in some way, shape, or form. 
The multimedia painting he made two weeks ago using polystyrene sheets was supposed to mimic sunlight through a stained glass window, but Jungkook hadn’t even noticed he'd drawn the window of the café you dragged him to on its opening day. And the colors of the glass is just the twinkle of your eyes when they stare back into his. 
The photoset he spent hours taking around the city, after taking a 15 minute train ride, were just repeats of all the places you two went to that one day. The book store. The park. The streetlight where Yoojung stopped him. He hadn’t even realized he only saved the photos associated with a subconscious memory of you. 
Jungkook can’t explain it, but he feels you in every single picture. Every piece of art that his hands have manifested since you walked into his life, stupid smile on your face and that little moon on your wrist. He feels it...and call it artist’s intuition or something but perhaps that’s why Professor Sejin could feel it too. 
Even though he stopped making you his muse months ago, you are still the root of inspiration for whatever he’s produced since. And if that’s not enough to finally tell him what he needs to hear. Finally make him realize that he’s fallen in love with you without even knowing it, the universe doesn’t know what will. 
The minutes it has been since he realized your place in his life melts like slow dripping honey, feeling like an eternity when it is mere moments. Jungkook regains his focus in the haze. He knows what you mean to him now, but there was something he had to fo first. 
He swipes all his paintbrushes and palette knives to the side, sweat on his brow as he furiously rearranges his portfolio. He takes out the pictures of Mina - no one would miss them anyway - and trashes all the photos he took before he met you. He only uses the art he’s created post-Y/N and tucks them in the manila folder so rapidly, there’s paper cuts on his fingers. But he doesn’t feel them. Jungkook has only one objective. 
He snaps a picture of the new clay sculpture he’s just finished. The photo goes into the portfolio with the name ‘Aphrodite’, but Jungkook knows better about whose face that truly belongs to. Not that anyone would bat an eye. He thinks you are as beautiful as the goddess herself. 
The trip to Professor Sejin’s office is short, unsurprising though, since Jungkook sprints the whole way there. When he arrives, and the professor can only stare as he’s bent over and huffing violently trying to catch his breath, Jungkook reminds himself to spend less time at the studio and more time on the cardio. 
He throws the portfolio onto the man’s desk unceremoniously, nearly collapsing on the chair across from him and not ready to speak yet. Professor Sejin confusedly rifles through the folder quickly, too quickly, and sighs, ready to offer Jungkook yet the same critique again. 
He opens his mouth, but Jungkook cuts him off. 
“Before you say anything…”, he gulps, finally ready to admit the truth to himself. 
“I want you to know that I’ve met my soulmate, a-and there’s a reason why you feel that my portfolio is all the same. There’s a reason why you feel it’s all one-noted or that there’s no progression.” Jungkook takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, and you are there behind his lids. 
“It’s because she sowed the seeds for all of them. Everything. Those paintings and photos and sculptures are just symptoms of what I’ve been feeling this whole time after meeting her. She’s practically the artist, not me.” Professor Sejin stays silent at his monologue, gaze unreadable but eyes sharp and trained solely on Jungkook. 
“Maybe...Maybe art doesn’t need to be super variegated all the time. Maybe it’s supposed to be a cohesive unit and the pieces should string to each other. Maybe paintings should have a relationship to photos and them, to sculptures. Maybe you’re just...wrong.” 
He is exasperated and passion flows out of him through every pore. Jungkook looks expectantly at his professor, who has the open folder in his hand and still in the process of taking in his words. When the adrenaline starts to fade, he realizes that he just dissed his venerable teacher. 
“With all due respect…”, he coughs, “sir.” 
Professor Sejin lets Jungkook spend the next couple minutes in complete torturous silence so that he can finish reviewing his portfolio. The tension is cut with the sound of the man’s hands slapping together as he closes the folder. Jungkook prepares himself for a stern lecture.
However, when he looks up, there is a smile on the man’s face. There’s no malice there, or even disdain. He pulls off his glasses, sets them on the table, and sits back in the office chair, arms folded over his chest. Jungkook can feel his heart threatening to pound past his rib cage. 
“Jungkook…”, Professor Sejin declares, “I think you’ve got a contender for the gallery spot.” 
If someone had asked you what Jeon Jungkook meant to you, you would look them in the eye and tell them that he meant nothing. Because it’s easier to pretend that someone does not mean anything to you after they pretend that you do not exist. That the universe had not given you both matching marks and deemed that your souls were meant for each other. Jeon Jungkook is a stranger to you. One that you wanted so badly to love. But you’ve come to learn that no matter how hard you try; you can’t love someone who doesn’t want to love at all.
So the days trickle by as they usually do. Painstakingly slow and viscous with memories of a boy named Jeon Jungkook and the way he has hurt you enough to last a little bit over forever. 
“I understand why you don’t want to go, Y/N. But aren’t you the least bit curious? Especially after that fancy invitation in the mail?” Jimin’s query is innocent. But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t make your blood boil. 
“I don’t know...the thought of going to my soulmate’s grand art gallery when the last time we spoke, he told me he can’t love me, just doesn’t seem appealing Jimin”, you snark, burying your face into the bowl of cereal you are now spooning far too aggressively. 
“’s been months. And he wouldn’t have sent you an invitation if he didn’t want you to come.” 
This conversation has happened too frequently since that red envelope arrived at your apartment. You cried your eyes out when you opened it, both out of pride for Jungkook and the fact that no matter what you did, the universe found a way to keep you from moving on. 
A sigh heaves through your chest, and the cereal is abandoned by your loss of appetite. “I’m not going to show up there and have him tell me again all of the reasons he can’t be with me. I barely survived it last time.” 
“But what if, Y/N?”
There is a glimmer in Jimin’s eye and he radiates so much hopefulness for you, you can’t help but to feel it too. 
“Isn’t the what if already enough? You used to tell me that Jungkook was worth anything. Isn’t he worth the risk this time too?”
You don’t have anything else to say after that because as much as you hate to admit, perhaps Jimin is right. Jungkook is worth going through anything for, even if he wants to stay as far away as possible. Call it a fluke in the postal system that the invitation to his gallery landed on your doorstep, but can you allow yourself to read between the lines and dare say that he sent it himself? Can you put yourself through such a perilous thing like optimism?
Jungkook has left you battered and broken for the past months. But you would give your heart to him to break all over again if he asked. 
To say that you did not fit in with those dawdling around the art gallery was a gross understatement. You didn’t just not fit in. Your entire presence and aura defied every expectation, and suddenly, watching the upper echelon of the city mingle with champagne and gaze critically at Jungkook’s art, makes every breath feel like an insecurity. 
The boy in question was nowhere in sight, and you now regret not dragging Jimin with you. The invitation had specifically prohibited plus one’s, and though Jimin whined to no end about his hurt feelings and emptily promised never to talk to Jungkook again, you managed to keep him home. Now, you wish you were back at the apartment with him.
The pieces were, in short, completely breathtaking (to no surprise, of course, this was Jungkook you were talking about). Though you knew he always held doubt in himself, in the short time he allowed you to be in his life, you had never once thought he was anything less than spectacular. Yet you could not allow yourself to completely enjoy them. Each brushstroke and paint color you remember from his palettes, or the filters on the photos that you helped him with, was agonizing to look at. 
You are standing in front of a canvas titled “Windowlight” when a man comes up beside you. He nurses a flute of bubbly champagne and makes no move to gain eye contact. Unknown to you, Professor Sejin knows exactly who you are. He’s seen your face in his student’s portfolio one too many times. 
“Artful use of mixed media, isn’t it?”, he mutters.
“I suppose so.” 
“He’s quite the prodigy. Have you met him yet? I’m sure he’s lurking around somewhere.” The man takes a sip from his glass, smirk on his lips hidden from your eyes that still blankly stare ahead.
“Yes. He’s a...friend.” We share a soulmate mark. He hates my guts. 
He hums a sound of affirmation and you ignore the weird feeling it leaves in your stomach; one that tells you this stranger sees right through you. 
“Ah, how rude of me. Professor Sejin. Arts director and senior advisor.” He spares you a brief glance, but you make no move to shake his hand or pretend to be courteous. You don’t have the energy for it tonight. Just being in this building, surrounded by everything Jungkook has touched, makes you want to collapse into yourself. 
“It was nice to meet you, Y/N.” He speaks nonchalantly, and you almost miss the fact that you never told him your name. Your brows crease in confusion and you are ready to turn and interrogate the stranger, but he is already walking away, gliding smoothly across the gallery. Before he gets too far, though, Sejin cranes his neck and makes eye contact. 
“Oh, and be sure to visit the one called ‘Moon’. It’s upstairs, next to the Aphrodite sculpture on the second level exhibit”, he entreats, a suspicious lilt in his voice.
“Something tells me you’ll appreciate its…sincerity.”
Honestly, you’re not sure what you expected when you came to Jungkook’s art gallery tonight. But to be approached by a stranger who already knows your name, who dubiously instructs you to seek out a mystery art piece, was not on the list of expectations. Still...Professor Sejin’s words made you curious. 
Through the night, your eyes subconsciously seek out that familiar head of fluffy brown hair and a tall gait that always seems to stick out, even in a large crowd. It was as if Jungkook versed himself in complete camouflage, so much so that you began to doubt that he was even in the building.  
The traipse through the gallery is done in silence and solitude, and you tune out the sounds of popping champagne and raucous laughter coming from the second floor, as the patrons undoubtedly banter over which piece to auction off. You hope he keeps them. You’ve never seen someone appreciate art the way that Jungkook does. 
You catch sight of a few pieces that you recognize, ones that you remember him showing you when he had finished. You always excitedly told him every single one was a masterpiece, and Jungkook only rolled his eyes and made minimal effort at hiding the blush on his cheeks. Your steps falter when you come across a set of photographs in black and white, set in consecutive frames next to each other and it feels so warm despite the lack of color. Jungkook just had that special talent when it came to photography. 
It’s the bookstore. In the city during the impromptu train ride you had coerced him to take. Your heart catches in your throat as you recognize all the other ones immediately because’ve been to all those spots. A familiar pressure builds in the back of your eyes, and you swallow down a whimper of pain. 
The urge to leave becomes too strong. But not strong enough to quell the slow burn of curiosity from Professor Sejin. There is a chance that you might not run into Jungkook at all tonight with the vast space and people bumbling through the corridors. It hurts to think that you might never see him again at all, but you’ll allow yourself another indulgence. Something is calling you. 
Moon. He titled it Moon? You grip onto your wrist reflexively and run your thumb over the mark, like you did when you were younger and still had hope for soulmates. The pulsepoint there beats under your finger and lets you know how alive you are. Compels you to give into your curiosity, even if it might decimate your already crumbling heart. The stairs that lead up to the second floor are short, but the trek feels like it knocks the wind out of you, or perhaps that was just the anticipation of what was waiting for you on the other side.
You were right to be scared. Because right in the smack dab center of the circular room is where you see it, and your gasp is one that can be heard from each wall and corner. 
A painting of you. A portrait from the waist up, with oil paint and so much detail, Jungkook has even managed to line the shallow wrinkles by your eyes when you smile. You have never considered yourself beautiful in any sense but the way he has captured you on canvas starts to make you believe that you truly are. You feel Jungkook in each streak of the brushstroke where he hadn’t spread the color evenly. It is as if the painting is alive, and though you are staring at yourself, it doesn’t feel like the way it does in the mirror. Doesn’t feel like a reflection. 
No, this feels like looking through Jungkook’s eyes. It is what he sees in you, rather than what you see in yourself. And what he sees is beautiful. Through the haze of shock and confusion as to why he chose this as the centerpiece, you don’t notice the warm presence that lurks behind you. The one that has watched your every move since you walked into this building. 
“Yeah, that’s my favorite one too.” 
You whip your head around so quick it nearly gives you whiplash, but the sight of him is the nail in the coffin. Jungkook is cleaned up in a black suit, and an unfamiliar smile on his lips he rarely lets you see. A genuine one that he’s tried to hide so many times but now that it’s clear and up close, you resent him for keeping it from you. 
Jungkook is just as gorgeous as the day you lost him. 
But looking at him hurts. You don’t know why you’re even here, and why he sent the invitation, or why he was standing in front of you now and there is not a sliver of antipathy in his eyes. You don’t know why your face is plastered in the center of the gallery. Most of all, you don’t know why you are still weak in the knees for Jeon Jungkook. 
“Although, I have to say, it was a close race between this one and the pictures I made you take at the lake, when you nearly dunked me in the river because it was so cold”, he breathily laughs but you aren’t able to get through the shock just yet. If Jungkook notices your starstruck state, he doesn’t let it affect him. 
“And I definitely have to give some credit to the one I painted after you told me about your dream”, Jungkook prattles on, “where you were a mermaid who planted peaches under the sea, remember? That’s an honorable mention.” 
These memories make you want to smile but in this moment, the best you can do is try to hold yourself together when your eyes begin to warm with tears. Jungkook stays silent when you do. He notices you haven’t said a word and your gaze refuses to meet his. 
“Why are you doing this, Jungkook?”, you curse yourself when your voice cracks. “Why are you telling me these things? Haven’t you hurt me enough?” Jungkook’s smile drops off his face, and for once, you can see your own pain reflected in his eyes. 
He takes a deep breath, hands hanging limply at his side that itch to wrap themselves around yours. To feel your skin. Feel your mark. 
“I…”, he hesitates in his words, “I remember that day every night when I go to sleep, Y/N. Every time I shut my eyes, I just see your face when I told you I can’t love you, and I don’t think I’ve ever felt such aching before. Not even when she left me.” Jungkook’s voice is tinted with desperation but it just makes your walls rise higher. 
He’s lying to you. Your tongue wants to protest, but he continues. 
“I see you in everything”, Jungkook breathes out, like he is also admitting it to himself. 
“The paintbrushes I can never put down to the black coffee I force myself to drink nowadays because the ones I actually like, the ones with too much whipped cream and vanilla syrup, just reminds me of you.” His brows are knitted, and his feet vie to step closer to your quivering form. But you look like a caged animal about to bolt at any moment. 
“And when I’m reminded of you, I am reminded of…”, he gulps down the fear, “I’m reminded of how I am utterly in love with someone who deserves so much more than what I have put them through.”
The blood that runs through your veins drops to subzero temperatures, and you swear in the split millisecond that you have absorbed what he’s just said, your heart ceases its beating. The world stops turning, and the waves still for a brief moment. You can’t find any words just yet, but Jungkook can see straight through you and your stupefied expression. 
“Y-you’re lying to me, Jungkook. Stop lying.” 
“I’m not lying, please…” Jungkook knows he’s losing you by the second, but he’s promised you he would persist. He just wants you to listen. Wants you to feel how sorry he is, and how his soul screams to be next to your’s. 
“I can’t explain how it happened. Like it was an epiphany. Like someone has been screaming at me and I had been ignoring them, and that someone was my own heart.” Jungkook doesn’t stumble over his words once. He does not stutter because it is the plain white truth. 
“Stop, Jungkook.”
“It’s been knocking on the door of my chest and when I finally let it in, it just yells and shouts ‘oh my god, you’re in love’ and then I realized oh my god, i’m in love. In between painting you and convincing myself that soulmates meant nothing to me, I’ve completely and unquestionably fallen in love with you, Y/N.” 
Jungkook can’t decipher the look on your face. Something between the lines of disbelief and heartbreak, and it makes him want to split at the seams at the pain he’s put you through. How he’s convinced you you’re impossible to love. He vows to make it right again.
“And you’re wrong, you know. You’re not hard to love. Hell, I was dead set on never loving again and you managed to make me so smitten, I can’t paint or draw a damn thing without including some aspect of you in it.” Jungkook steps back and gestures to all the canvases and photos that hang on the wall. 
“Take a look around, Y/N. It’s all you. Every piece.” Once he says it, you finally notice Every piece of art in this room can be traced to you, or a memory you two share. It’s so clear, you don’t know how you missed it before. You feel yourself in the art Jungkook has poured his soul into. Instead of making you feel elated, these words that you’ve been waiting your entire life to hear just ignites the sting. 
“Just stop. Please.” It is only a weak whisper through your lips, and he ignores it. 
“If you can’t forgive me, I get it Y/N. I can’t forgive myself either. But can you just know that you are enough. You are more than what I deserve. And I know you told me to be happy, but there is no way I can possibly do that without you.” 
When your gaze falls to the floor, you notice that his wrist is clean of any bracelets or watches. Come to think of it, this is one of the first times you are seeing it clear and in the flesh. Jungkook doesn’t tell you, but nowadays, he doesn’t allow anything to impede on the sight of the crescent moon.
When your guard is down and you are distracted, he finds the perfect time to finally reach forward and take your hand in his. His touch is gentle when it wraps around your wrist, tugging off the ribbon that circled it, and revealing the matching mark. Your pulse jumps under his fingers, and skips a beat when he runs a thumb over the moon. You are already melting with such simple contact, and you almost allow yourself to succumb. Almost.
It’s as if suddenly his skin was scalding, and you snatch your wrist from his grasp at lightning speed. The tears that have strayed down your face are wiped away as quickly as they came. The surprise on his face is missed by your eyes because before he can comprehend what is happening, you are bolting down the staircase and out the glass doors of the gallery. No, you cannot forgive him yet. What would you do if he hurt you again? You don’t think you would survive. 
You ignore the pain of seeing his art pieces as you run, now that you know you are the muse behind them all. The only noise is the sound of blood rushing in your ears, and you are oblivious to the racket of Jungkook’s shoes clapping against marble flooring as he chases after you, expertly dodging the other patrons and butlers holding trays of champagne. 
And Jungkook? Well, he is oblivious to the complete turmoil that runs through your every nerve. He only sees your back, and not the way you bite your lip painfully to keep the sobs from escaping. Not the way your pain is exhibited clear as day in the crease of your eyebrow and the wrinkle of your nose. 
The air outside is so cold it bites at your nostrils, but makes it easier to breathe. The wind calms the thundering heart in your chest.
He must be lying. There was no way he had a change of heart now, not when he was so rooted in his belief before. There is no virtual possibility, on any plane of existence, on any dimension where Jeon Jungkook has fallen in love with you. 
The hand that circles around your wrist tightly to keep you from getting any farther tells you that you are wrong. He did come after you. Jungkook’s strength forces you to stop running, but you can’t find the courage to turn around and face him just yet. But you don’t make an effort to pull away, and he takes it as progress.
“You can run if you want, Y/N. You can walk away from me and from us, but don’t doubt that I’ll always be chasing after you. For as long as it takes.” He is panting and speaking through heavy breaths, but you hear him. Loud and clear. 
“I won’t let you leave again. Not like last time.”
There is no malice. No coldness, and for the first time since you’ve met him, his words feel like warm honey instead of monotone ice. He is utterly distraught when you turn around slowly, hesitant like you’re afraid he will break your heart right then and there. 
His heart shatters at the wetness at your waterline, and the way you look up at him; completely vulnerable and scared. 
“Do you promise?” 
There is a lot of weight in your three-word question. It’s not as innocent as meets the eye, and Jungkook knows it. He feels it. When you ask him if he promises, it is an invitation back to you. You are offering him your heart, which he has already broken and bruised, and trusting him to be careful with it this time around. Jungkook already knows he loves you. And if you let him, he’ll spend the rest of his life making sure this promise remains unbroken. 
“I promise.” 
It’s a commitment. One he used to be terrified of making, but it seems so easy when it’s for you. 
And when you fly forward to wrap your arms around him, Jungkook feels like home. Like the stars twinkle a little brighter and the earth stops spinning for a mere second, just for the two of you. You feel him squeeze you closer, just as tightly, and Jungkook wants to kick himself for depriving you both of a simple thing called love. 
You are here, souls and now bodies intertwined, and Jungkook lets the pain of past hurt fall away. Pain is so miniscule when you are by his side. When you pull back, Jungkook frowns at your red-rimmed eyes, and the tears that still persist. He wipes it away oh so softly, as if you were delicate clay and he, a sculptor. 
“Please don’t cry anymore, princess, it breaks my heart. I’m so sorry.” It is the softest, most sugary tone you’ve ever heard out of him. But hearing affection from his lips makes you feel that perhaps all of this sorrow, this longing, has been worth it. He has been worth it. He always has. 
“I love you, Y/N.” Jungkook’s words are almost as beautiful as he is. 
His lips are familiar when you lean forward and kiss him. Yet they are different. This time, the hands on your waist hold you a bit more carefully, even closer if that were possible. You can feel his thudding heart as it beats against your own, learning to match rhythms with each other, and Jungkook cradles your face in his hand like you are the only artwork he has truly been proud of. 
And it’s true. All the canvases and paints and camera film seem wasted now. Nothing he ever makes will be quite as alluring as the art he holds in his arms in this moment. 
“I love you too, you goddamn idiot.”
You meant it all those months ago, and you mean it now. If Jeon Jungkook was the sun, you would gladly change your name to Icarus. If Jeon Jungkook was the moon, then you are the tides that he pushes and pulls. If Jeon Jungkook belonged to you, don’t have to imagine that anymore. He is your’s, as you are his. 
Old habits die hard, but they are not immortal. They wax and wane, and remind you that in the cosmic vastness of things, you are only human. Humans whose hearts beat in tandem and souls made to complete the other. Humans with identical crescent moons, lost but now found.
Old habits die hard. But you have learned to fix those of a broken heart. 
5K notes · View notes
kingsuckjin · a year ago
Ungodly Beast
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✞ Pairing: Devil! Jungkook x reader
✞ Genre: smut, slight horror, Jungkook devil au
✞ Warnings: blasphemous content, y/n can't have children (hints at IVF), impreg kink, dick size kink, tattoo kink, fingering (f), thigh riding, oral (m and f receiving), face riding, dom! jungkook , rough sex, manhandling, degradation (f name calling), choking, kook has horns black eyes and a forked tongue, overstimulation (f), pain kink, ruined orgasm and orgasm denial (f), daddy kink, choking kink
✞ Rating: 18+ (M)
✞ Synopsis: You were sure about this, sure enough to summon Satan himself. A baby all of your own was all you had ever wanted, it was all you had ever dreamed of, it was the only thing your life was lacking. But what price would you have to pay for it? You thought in the beginning that there was nothing you wouldn't do to have your wish granted, well…
✞ Words: 5.1k
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Your hands shook as you held the slightly burnt and stiff paper you had found on your nightstand. You didn't know if you were shaking because you were tired, in shock that it had worked, or you were afraid. It had taken you years to do this, so many things needed to summon him, so many hoops to jump through, you had almost given up. But as you held the paper in your hands, the solid proof in words that you had finally done it, your fear, shock and any other negative emotions turned to overwhelming joy.
"Tonight, meet me at the bar you like so much. You know the one." 
The paper read so casually. You expected something more formal from an entity so powerful. It didn't matter though, tonight you were going to get what you had always wanted no matter the cost, no matter what the devil asked of you.
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The only time he isn't looking at you since you had arrived was when he threw back a shot like it was water. You couldn't even explain how good he looked in his white dress shirt that was buttoned down a few buttons and black dress pants. He could’ve been just a man who had gotten off work and wanted a drink, but you knew better. There was something about him that was dark and sexy, maybe it was the shaggy wavy hair dangling almost in his eyes or maybe it was the tattoos that littered his body. Despite how gorgeous he was, everyone at the bar stayed away from him almost as if he couldn't see him at all. The more you looked at him the more you could make out a depth and duality of his appearance. He looked young but not too young, as if he could be someone's younger brother, a puppy like look. As he threw back his second shot you could see  the sides of a black upside down crucifix on the side of his neck. 
  You had never seen him before, his shaggy wavy hair, his cold and cocky gaze, his beauty, yet you knew exactly who he was. You had spent years on this, only now to finally meet with him and be too scared to face him. You felt like a coward as you stared back at him. You felt so drawn to him as if he were silently beckoning you over to him with his dark but expectant looks, as if he already owned your soul. Maybe he did. You knew he had to already know why he was here.
You took a deep breath as if it were your last before you stood, trying to hide your knees shaking while he sipped on a second drink. His dark eyes ran up and down your body in a way that reminded you of a panther sizing up its prey. Your heart sped up at least two times faster.
As you sat down in the stool beside him, he turned away from you and faced forward and silently up two fingers to the bartender.
"What do you want from me? You didn't drag me here just to say you're a big fan, did you darling?" He still didn't look at you as he spoke, instead, he took the shots the bartender sat down in front of him and pushed one your direction.
"I- you- do people do that?" You couldn't help but wonder. You doubted someone would go through as much impossible hell as you did just to summon him to see him.
"Humans are curious creatures, and stupid. You'd be surprised." He threw the shot back and finally looked at you.
It took you a moment to realize he wanted you to do the same, so you did. You could've sworn that the burn of the shot going down your throat was more fiery than usual, but you were too nervous to think too much about it.
"How about instead of you telling me what you want, I guess what you want." He offered as he narrowed his eyes at you as if to try to gaze through you into your soul. You knew he already knew, you could feel he knew. You came to the conclusion that he just wanted to show his power in the form of a party trick. Even before he had wanted to show off what he could do, you felt more than ever that he was possibly the most dangerous thing in the universe.
"Okay." You agreed.
"You want a baby." His reply was so fast it almost cut you off. "Because you can't have children." 
"Do you know everything about everyone?" 
"Maybe I do." Was his vague reply before he gave you a smirk and slowly leaned in "What if I knew everyone's deepest, darkest desires, huh? Wouldn't that be something?" He gave you a wink as he pulled back and retreated, so there was more space between you.
"Is that really what you want? A crying, screaming, child that you are forever attached to, even after it's no longer a child?" He lifted a brow as if he could change your mind, you had summoned the devil for this, there was no changing your mind.
"Yes." Your answer was simple and firm.
"You maternal humans truly baffle me. There's really nothing you wouldn't do for your children." 
You thought now of all the mothers who had possibly summoned him just to save their child. You felt a pit in your stomach as you wondered what they had to give him in return, perhaps their own souls, perhaps something worse.
"But if it's a baby you want, then a baby you shall receive." He reached over and put a tattooed hand over the top of your empty shot glass, and when he removed it it was filled to the brim with the same liquor as before. 
You picked it up and threw it back as you felt just a little more brave than moments ago.
"And what do you want in return? My soul?" You asked as you set the glass back onto the bar and felt the burn of the liquid once again traveling down your esophagus.
You were nearly startled when he let out a loud, closed eyed cackle of amusement.
"Do I look like some silly, simple demon to you?" His gaze refixed itself on you, it became hard and stern, letting you know once again that he was above you, he held more power. "I don't deal in souls, I'm a go big or go home kind of guy, the king of all bad and every sin. Plus, hell needs no help roping in you silly mortals, you all fall into the fiery pit that I call home all on your own." His brown eyes flickered over your body once more "What I want is something I surprisingly can't receive in my world."
He looked you over once more, but this time his teeth caught his lower lip and tugged. 
You stared at his mouth and felt your pulse quicken at the thought of him biting your lip just like that, or any part of your body really.
"I'll give you a baby darling, but I want it the carnal and mortal way. I only work, and you know what they say about all work and no play. It's not everyday I get summoned by…" he lifted a hand to your chin and let his thumb brush over your cheek "someone so.. in need." 
You could feel the heat from his hand even after he had dropped it, it was as if he had burned himself into your skin but in the most gentle way possible.
"I promise to make it worthwhile. Those are my terms for now. Keep your silly soul." 
Your mouth felt so dry, you swallowed to try to bring back the moisture to it as you mulled this over in your mind. You didn't expect the devil himself to offer to give you a baby. More so, you wondered what the baby would be, would it be more human or… him.
He tilted his head and his wavy dark locks fell away from his face, once again almost reminding you of a puppy.
"Something wrong? Not a good enough deal?" He questioned as if he were about to take it all back causing you to panic.
"No! No no, it's a good deal, it's amazing actually. But… it will be yours, right so…"
"It will be mine." He nodded. "Are you trying to ask if I want some form of visitation? I believe I've hinted at not liking screaming infants." He looked to mull it over for a moment "perhaps when he's older, if it's alright. I'd hate to be a dead beat dad." His smile was charming and very contagious.
"So… you don't do this often?" 
"You think I have a bunch of bastard devil children running around? No. He will be my only one. Don't you feel special darling?"
"I-I um…" you didn't know what to say. Did you feel special? Yes. It was both enthralling and terrifying to know no one had ever gotten this chance before, but you couldn't help but wonder why you were the only one.
"Getting back on topic here," he began as he took on a more serious tone. "do you agree to my terms? Sorry, I have to ask for clarity. Is it a deal? Would you really do anything to have a baby of your very own?" 
"Yes." You replied without hesitation. You had thought about it so many times even before summoning him, and there's nothing you wouldn't give to be able to hold a small piece of you, a life you created yourself. 
"So be it." His words somehow held finality, but his smirk read of darkness. Something in your mind told you there was no turning back now.
"So, how does this work… do I drive? Do you want to-"
He cut you off with a chortle of a laugh.
"Come here." He beckoned you closer with a quick sideways tilt of his head and a mischievous smile.
You stood from the bar stool and took a step closer to where he was seated, nearly enclosing the space between you both. You stood between where his feet rested on the bars of the stool, right between his legs. He brought his face closer and closer to yours.
"Close your eyes." His whispered demand sounded almost like the quiet hiss of a snake, straggling, as if it were coiling around your mind, entrapping and pulling you closer. 
Your eyes closed as you felt his far too hot breath on your lips.
The somber chatter of the not quite busy bar around you fell away.
"Just imagine you bring me home." He continued to whisper into the now surrounding silence as you did as he asked. You thought of taking him back to your place, quiet and dark.
"Just us in your bedroom… you ready to surrender to me, ready to make this baby." 
As he spoke you felt a little disoriented for a moment, all light that filtered through your closed eyelids was gone, all sounds were washed completely away.
You let out a small gasp as you felt the heat of his fingertips move slowly up your upper arm to your shoulder. 
"Eyes still closed? You're an obedient one, aren't you?" 
You heard the creak of floor boards around you and you swore they sounded far too familiar. Your thought was cut off by his breath right in your right ear, the warmth sending goosebumps spread as fast as fire eats gasoline over your body.
"Do you want to open them now?"
As your eyes opened the first thing that came to mind was that you were definitely no longer in the bar. You were now in your dark room, just as you had imagined, facing your bed. You were home.
You heard him pacing around your room before stopping at the window that overlooked the city. You lived about twenty floors up and the city lights from outside was what was keeping your bedroom dimly lit.
"Rich girl, huh?" He gazed out the window casually with his hands clasped behind his back. "Let me guess, family was poor but became rich fast when you were young?" 
Your mouth floundered at just how right but rude he was. Fortunately, he seemed to already know he was right, so he went on to ask you a question.
"Surely a girl with money like you can afford medical procedures to help make a child, right?"
"I've tried them all." Your response was quick this time "they just left me feeling sick and with even less hope. The doctors said it would take a miracle." 
He let out a short, sarcastic laugh as he turned around and took slow strides towards you, eyes locked on you but he looked shockingly different.
Gone were his brown eyes, his eyes were now a solid black throughout, like two marbles made of polished obsidian.
Two textured yet smooth looking dark horns had grown from the top of his head. They reminded you of rams horns in the way that they twisted, curled and looped once.
You weren't scared however, intrigued and in awe mostly.
"It doesn't seem like you mind that I slipped into something more comfortable, human form is hard to maintain." 
As he spoke all you could do was stare at the horns, they looked like they had smooth little bumps all over them.
"I don't mind." You told him quietly and he stepped closer until his body was just inches from yours, forcing you to look him in the inky eyes.
"You like it." He smirked with his accusation before ducking his head to the side of yours to whisper in your ear "Well that's not all of me I think you'll enjoy.
Your thoughts ran wild as you imagined what body parts he could be talking about and what they might look like.
He moved his face back to where it was just mere millimetres from yours, grazing his soft lips over yours in a half kiss before raising his hand to gently cup your cheek before connecting his lips fully.
Your lips drank from his as if it was the only water in a desert, an oasis.
His mouth refused to let your tongue in, like the gates of heaven that you'd never get into now.
He took you by the forearm with his free hand and led you, eyes closed, mouths attached.
When his lips came off of yours, you heard your bed springs sink in so you opened your eyes. He sat in front of you on the edge of your bed looking up at you.
His hands went to the bare part of your lower thighs, running them up to your hips, bunching up the material of your dress until your lacy black panties were revealed to him.
"Please get out of… this." He let his hands and material fall before yanking on the hem of the fabric, as if he were a confused child trying to determine where to begin on a puzzle. While earlier you might've nearly been fooled into seeing a soft quality about him, you still hadn't been. This was the only real moment so far that you had seen him for anything other than what he truly was, a horned beast, the opposite of almost that is good in the world.
You reached for the zipper on the dress concealed at the side and pulled it down. He watched as the cloth fell away from your body to the ground. You leaned over in only your dark sheer underwear to help get your heels off when he made a demand.
"Sit on my knee darling, face me." He sounded so strong and sure that any piece of nervousness or humility you thought you had seen in him moments ago, was crushed and burned to ash.
You did as he asked and straddled his still dress pant clad left knee. It didn't seem good enough for him however, because he placed his hands on your back and pulled you into him in one swift motion until your chests touched.
He pressed his lips back to yours as his hands drifted down from your back to your hips, harshly grabbing fists full of your flesh in his hands.
You let out a shaky breath into his lips as he guided your hips, forcing you to grind your already sticky core and throbbing clit against his hard muscular thigh.
"So needy." He mumbled into your skin as his lips moved to your neck "I'm not disappointed. You like the way my body feels against yours?" He continued to move your lips against his leg, taking full control of the situation and you.
"You have no idea what I'm going to do to you." He whispered making you clench around nothing and wish he was buried inside of you already. "I can hear your little mortal heart beating as fast as a hummingbird's wings. So fragile you humans."
"I'm not." You painted as you moved your hips on your own now, trying desperately to get yourself off in the only way he was allowing.
Your response earned you a quiet doubt filled chuckle from him. You knew for a fact you were fragile compared to this all powerful being.
“Is that an invite for me to hurt you? Hm?” he squeezed your ass hard in his hands and a weak whimper of a moan left your mouth.
He released the flesh of your ass he was harshly grabbing only seconds before you felt a slight sting of a slap in the same spot.
"Answer me." He let out his demand through what sounded like clenched teeth.
"Yes. Yes please. Please hurt me." You begged as he went back to controlling your hips, pushing you down harder onto his muscular thigh.
"That's all you had to say, darling." He whispered over your repeated moans. You were coming so close, so fucking close, when he stilled your hips and unhooked your bra. The moment the garment it carelessly hit his lap before falling to the floor, his very warm mouth was wrapped around a nipple. His wet tongue toying with the hardening bud felt so good you almost didn't notice… something felt different about it.
You let out a gasp the moment the thought crossed your mind. You could almost swear he had two tongues.
You had to know what the hell was going on in his mouth so you lifted his head by pulling at the back of his hair until his mouth came away from your tit with a slight pop.
You daringly kissed him hungrily, shoving your tongue into his mouth curiously searching for his. When you found it you used yours to explore his, and your answer about his tongue sent a slight tingling through you.
His tongue was forked, split in two at the middle.
Just as you figured his little secret out he broke the kiss.
"Find something you like?" He seemed to tease.
"Maybe." You didn't know if it was the shots you had earlier or if you were just pretending he was human.
"Want to see what it can do?" His question caused a spark to ignite inside of you, giving birth to a roaring fire of bravery.
You pushed him backwards on the bed, or more so he let you push him. He seemed to like your little show of power because you could see a slight smile as you crawled up his torso, kicking off the last article of clothing that he had yet to strip from you, your panties.
He caught on quite fast and helped guide you with his hands on your hips until they hovered right over his face. He hooked his hands over your thighs and pulled you down lower onto his face.
You sucked in a breath as you felt his forked tongue wasted no time in roaming your folds, teasingly avoiding your clit. You needed more and tried to rock into his face but the grasp he had on your thighs was strong.
You looked down at him between your legs and he cocked an eyebrow up at you, seeming proud of himself for teasing you.
“Please, please, please, I- I need more.” you begged, but his tongue continues to avoid any place that could get you off.
He put his hands flat on your back, lifted you up and laid you down on your back, switching your positions in a fraction of a second.
You were momentarily surprised by his strength, only because you momentarily forgot he was inhuman.
All was forgotten again when he used both sides of his tongue to play with your clit. You were so distracted by his odd tongue and the indescribable feeling of it, that you didn't even notice that he had slipped two fingers into you. It wasn't until he curved them and hit your g-spot with just the right amount of pressure that they were inside of you at all.
You were writhing under his movements, jerking your hips into his mouth. You were trying so hard to reach your high.
You looked down at your legs splayed, his mess of dark wavy hair and horns moving along with his mouth.
His black eyes met yours for a moment, but he didn't stop, instead he closed them and worked his tongue and fingers harder.
"Oh God-" you felt it coming, just as you braced yourself with your hands bunching your sheets, he pulled away from your body entirely and sat up on his knees. He watched your face go from ready, to surprised to disappointed, all while a smirk spread across his own.
"Fuck you-" you caught yourself and remembered you didn't know what to call him "Satan?"
As unbuttoned his shirt and stunned you with his perfectly carved abs, he spoke
"You know what would be fun?" 
He threw his dress shirt to the floor before undoing his pants and sliding those off as well.
He now sat on his knees in black boxer briefs, between your still spread thighs, palming the biggest erection you had ever seen, even in the dark like this.
You were far too busy admiring his body and the show to respond.
"If you called me daddy." He dropped down on all fours over you "Might as well, right?" He was right in your face, words sounding like a growl.
"I-" Your voice trembled as you looked him dead in the dark eyes. Within an instant his hand was on your throat while the other held him up over you.
"Did I ask?" His teeth were clenched, maybe harder than he clenched the sides of your neck to restrict blood flow. 
You let out a quiet moan and that seemed to fire him up. He pushed his still clothed cock against your bare core before shoving his tongue into your mouth for just a moment.
"If you want me to put a fucking kid in you, you're going to do and say what I want you to." 
He dipped his face into your ear as he eased the hold on your neck.
"Yes what?" 
"Yes, daddy." 
"That's right bitch." His tone was sinister but so delightful, you could feel it throughout your body raising goosebumps across your skin. It was as if your body was telling you something was just wrong but your brain was begging for him to fuck you in its hyper turned on state.
His mouth was back on your lips.
"Do you feel my big cock ready to ruin your pretty little pussy?" He asked as it rubbed between your folds, the fabric of his underwear creating friction on your clit.
"Yes, oh fuck, yes daddy." You noticed you were already panting and sweating, maybe it was from how warm his body felt against yours, maybe it was from all the need coursing through you.
"Tell me how badly you want me to fuck a baby into you." He demanded as he managed to get his underwear down and off. You didn't have to look down to tell how big his cock was, you could feel the girth of it against you.
Your hands now roamed his muscular back.
"I want it so, fucking, badly. Give me a baby." You purred out your answer but it seemed like a pathetic attempt at being sexy compared to all that he was.
You let out a little squeal of surprise as he pulled at your hair, yanking it back so your neck was exposed.
You could feel his warm breath ghost over it.
"You'd have to be a real special kind of dumb whore to want a baby with the devil, Yeah?" You could hear the smoke in his voice before you felt not just his warm lips on the sensitive skin of your neck, but his teeth too.
"Maybe your mama should've taught you not to play with the devil." He murmured after releasing the pinched skin between his teeth.
You shuddered at the feeling and his words.
You felt his cock rut along the outside of your soaking slit teasingly.
"Maybe that's just the kind of thing I'm into." 
He let out a soft pleasured hum either from your statement or from his now sickened cock rubbing against you once more.
"You know what? I like you." He almost sounded to be taunting you further. Someone like him would never like a mortal like you. He was the devil, he probably didn't like anyone. Still though, his words made your heart flutter, right up until he shoved the head of his cock inside of you making you gasp at the suddenness. 
He grabbed a hold of your hair once more and his solid black eyes looked into yours as he slowly sank deeper into you. His cock was thicker than you had thought, and longer too, you wondered when it would end or if he was just planning to impale you with it.To take him, your nails dug down into the only thing that made him seem human, his flesh until he had bottomed out against your cervix. You waited for him to move for just a moment, for him to slam into you, but instead he sat up vertically and grabbed your hips.
As if you weighed nothing to him, he pulled you fast and hard down onto his dick. Pleasure shot through you along with the pain of his size stretching you.
He looked down at you and your mouth that was dropped open in awe of him. You took him in, his rippling muscles, his twisting horns, the smirk on his face and all you could think was fuck as your cunt clenched around him at just the sight of this beast, this king, the man just as important as God himself.
He pulled your hips back and you knew what was coming, but the moment he slammed you back down onto his cock, he kept going, fast. He was using you to fuck himself, you were nothing but a rag doll right now to him, but the thought of that only made him relentlessly pounding you feel even better. 
His low, throaty groans and moans were just an added bonus to the raw, unbridled sounds of his skin slapping against yours.
"Oh my fucking go-" 
"Don't fucking say it." He growled at you "don't you fucking call his name when the devil is balls deep in your cunt."
You hadn't even realized what you were about to say, you were already so fucked out of your mind.
When he stopped you were worried you had actually offended him, you were worried he would stop and call the whole thing off.
He put your legs over his shoulders as he came back down over you, face to face, bending you in half with your knees against your body. His black bangs dangling in his face, black eyes peering through them, his hand going back around your throat.
He abruptly began fucking into you again, but faster as he squeezed the sides of your neck with his fingers.
"Who do you fucking belong to?" 
He was so deep inside of you and you felt so light headed that it was hard to control the moans that left your mouth. "Say it, fucking say who's whore you are." 
"Yours." You squeaked out and he let up on the pressure of your neck just as you came hard around every inch of him that he was making you take.
"that's right, show me, don't just tell me." He seemed amused by how your body responded to him, legs twitching on his shoulders, fingers digging into your sheets, eyes fluttering, mouth gasping.
As soon it was over you felt another one coming on, he wouldn't slow down, he wouldn't stop, his stamina seemed to be inhuman too. He was fucking you so hard you swore he was about to break your bed, or would by the time he came.
"You going to cum again? Desperate for that needy little pussy to be filled up with my cum?"
"Please" You whined, confirming to him your desperation.
"Cum." He commanded. "Do it whore, earn my cum." 
You didn't know if you could, you felt exhausted and drained. 
"You want me to fuck a baby into you? Want me to fill you up, pump your guts full of my cum?"
"Yes please yes." You begged feeling closer now.
"Your greedy pussy needs to milk every fucking drop of my seed, I'll fuck you nice and deep and fuck it into you so you can get pregnant." 
His dirty talk combined with his actions of grinding deeply into you detonated your orgasm.
"Fuck, that's it. Fuck I'm going to fill your cunt so full." He babbled.
Just as you thought it couldn't feel any better, you felt spurt after spurt of his cum fill you. It felt too warm to be human, it tingled in the weirdest way.
You watched his face as his jaw went slack and he let out a long hoarse moan. He gave a few more thrusts before sitting up still inside of you.
His head hung down and you thought maybe he was trying to catch his breath until you realized you were the only one breathing heavily.
He let out a very short laugh before pulling out of you carefully.
You reached for a pillow by your head to prop up your hips to keep from letting any of his cum dribble out before covering yourself up.
He was already halfway through getting dressed when you looked at him, you swore you could see a smirk on his face as he buttoned his shirt.
For a moment, and a bit too late, you thought about asking him to stay over, but you realized that would be silly.
Your eyes watched him until he was fully dressed and standing at the foot of your bed.
You saw his face now and knew for a fact his smile was sinister.
"I wasn't joking when I said your mom should've really warned you about me." 
You felt like he knew something you didn't and you were confused.
"You're not the only dumb bitch in your family you know. Mama came to me poor and hungry, pregnant with you." 
An unsettling feeling had reached its peak inside of you.
"She begged me to make her family rich so her daughter could grow up right. I agreed, but I always take something. Guess what I took?" He chuckled coldly.
As the answer hit you, you felt like sobbing, but your body just couldn't.
"Ever wonder why you couldn't have children even though you were perfectly healthy? Ever wonder why all those expensive treatments never worked? But don't worry, I'm giving you what you want. Good luck with my child, don't even try to hurt him. I'll be back in five years to take him."
You felt devastated and furious all at once, you went to speak but he interrupted with a fake pout.
"What? Not fair? Your mother said that too. I only agreed to let you have a baby. You're lucky in giving you five years with him." His smile turned sickeningly charming "just enough time to get attached. You really shouldn't make deals with the devil you know, but I guess it's far too late for that, even a generation ago." 
He was standing there one moment and gone the next, leaving you as alone and crying as hard as you ever have, even harder than the time you found out you couldn't have children.
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blu-joons · 4 months ago
Our Little Girl ~ Jeon Jungkook
Pairing: Expecting Dad!Jungkook x Reader
Warnings: Slightly descriptive pregnancy, labour and birth
Word Count: 5.3k
Summary: Your little girl has been what the two of you have dreamt of for so long, finally the time has come to welcome her into the world with Jungkook by your side.
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“You know, for a man that’s about to raise a daughter for the next eighteen years at least, you’re looking rather cocky.”
Jungkook could only smile from the other side of the room as a grimace danced upon your face at the feeling of another contraction hitting you. You’d lost count of the hours you’d been almost doubled over in bed some time ago, barely able to keep your eyes open at the excruciating pain that you found yourself in. With each passing breath, the gaps of relief that came between contractions became smaller and smaller, almost unbearable.
You’d watched plenty of documentaries before your pregnancy to know what to expect, and yet as you found yourself staring forwards at the figure of your husband, keeping his distance from your growing temper, none of what you saw on the television seemed to play out before you. Under watery eyes, you could just make out the time on the clock hanging just above Jungkook’s head, 3:15am.  You scoffed at the sight, doubting even in yourself how much longer you could go through such an ordeal. Despite the several months you’d had to lead up to this moment, not a single part of it could truly prepare you for what was to come.
As another struck against the pit of your stomach, Jungkook raced back across to your side, resting his hands over your reddened ones that gripped tightly onto the rails beside your bed. Murmurs of encouragement came from him, words you’d listened to him repeat for countless hours, and still each time they somehow managed to make your heart a little bit happier. As he counted you through the breaths to see you through, his free hand brushed over your hair, ignoring the beads of sweat that had formed in your hairline as best as he possibly could, focusing on the task at hand and being the best possible husband instead.
“You’re doing so incredibly well,” he whispered as he noticed that the pain was beginning to subside once again, offering you the best possibly smile he could muster, hiding his own feelings of exhaustion that were beginning to come through. Your head nodded, tilting slightly to the left, biting down on your bottom lip until you were sure that the contraction had subsided. A small wriggle from your little one let you know they were done for the time being, waiting patiently, or impatiently, to make their grand entrance.
“You’re getting close now,” your midwife called out, stood in the doorway, keeping an eye on the corridor as she had done for most of the evening, and night. “I must admit, I’ve not seen many women get through labour as well as you have for quite some time Y/N.”
“I’m not really left with much of an alternative to get through it right now,” you sighed, throwing your body back against the bed, allowing the sweat ridden sheets to wrap around you. The end never seemed to quite be in sight, no matter how many times her cheery voice suggested otherwise. In fact, if Jisoo wasn’t quite such a sweetheart, you’d have probably given her what for a long time ago with all of her reassurances.
“She’s a strong girl, I always told you that,” Jungkook whispered from the side of you, grinning proudly across at the elder woman. “So strong I think I might end up having to take up one of your beds soon with a couple of broken knuckles, are women supposed to squeeze this hard when they’re in labour?”
Jisoo’s head nodded, having told you about her four kids several times throughout the night, she had experience on both sides. She’d seen it all, broken hands, broken noses, but best of all, hundreds of humans enter the world.  
“Y/N you do what you want, ignore your husband,” she teased.
Once again, your head could only manage a nod, too consumed by the everchanging feelings that were going on around your bump to truly pay much attention to what was being said around you. The beep of the heart monitor, murmurs of passers-by, shrieks of other women in the ward all seemed to amalgamate into one at this point.
“I don’t think we’ll have to wait around much longer for baby to arrive,” she advised the two of you, “but things are only going to get worse, are you sure that I can’t get you anything?”
“No,” you muttered, despite a concerned Jungkook looking down at your tired figure, “I said that I was going to try and do this naturally, and until I can’t take it anymore, that’s what I’m going to do.”
“No one would think any less of you if you wanted an epidural,” Jungkook reminded you, moving his hand back across to rest over your now much calmer one. “Or maybe gas if you’re not feeling a needle? We saw it on that programme, remember?”
“We spent an hour laughing at a woman too high to even push,” you scolded, shaking your head at the memory. It had tickled you at the time, but the more you thought about not being able to remember your baby’s birth like she had, the more off-putting it became.
“It’s all here just in case,” Jisoo spoke up anyway, pointing across to a small table that was at the back of the delivery room, “too many women change their minds last minute and then we have to leap into action with it all.”
“I bet you might end up having another case like that, she’s a stubborn one,” Jungkook joked.
“Excuse me, I’ll have you- “
You were cut off by another pain stabbing against your side, hurling your body forwards, instantly gripping tighter onto Jungkook’s hand, causing him to yelp. He sat further up in his seat, throwing his free arm around your back, tracing circles against the exposed bit of skin your hospital gown showed off. Your body didn’t have much time to react, snapping your eyes around to look at Jungkook, searching for any bit of help he could offer. Instead, he could only stare helplessly back at you, there was nothing that he could do to truly take away your pain, nothing that would make the experience better for you in that moment, instead all he could promise was to be the best possible father and husband once your little girl eventually decided to come into the world.
As the pain fell aside once again, you leant across to rest against Jungkook’s shoulder, soaking his grey tee, not that he minded, pressing a kiss against the top of your head.
“So strong,” he whispered against your skin, as he had done tens, if not hundreds of times since your water broke in the very early hours of the previous day.
“I feel so weak,” you hummed in response to him, loosening your grip against his hand once again, holding onto only his index finger, admiring the tattoos that he wore so proudly. “I always thought I was strong Kook, but even this might be too much for me.”
His head shook instantly at your words, searching across to Jisoo for a small piece of reassurance that could remind you how good of a job you were doing in delivering your miracle.
“Soon,” her voice called out, although it wasn’t much, it was a small bit of hope that you could hold onto that your ordeal would be done soon. You adored Jungkook, but the calls of the professional who had taken such good care of you made you feel a lot better in an instant.
“Soon,” Jungkook reiterated, tightening the hold that he had around your waist, inviting you to relax into his side as opposed to the bed that you’d been on for hours. “This will all be worth it; you just have to remember that through the hard times.”
Another hum came from you, tracing aimlessly against his calloused skin. “I wish it was as easy for me to believe that as it is for you to say it right now.”
“Y/N,” he whispered, kissing against your forehead once again, “please don’t start giving up on any of this right now.”
“I’m just tired,” you whined, fighting the urge to give your eyes even a second to close out of fear of what might happen if you did. “Every part of me is so tired right now.”
“I get it,” Jungkook assured you, refusing to let you go through the fight alone, “I can’t even begin to imagine how hard this is for you right now my love.”
“Are you sure it’s too late for us to swap positions?” You joked, trying to remove the negativity that ran through your mind, “I think you’d love to be in labour secretly.”
“You know I would if I could, in a heartbeat,” he sniggered, raising his free hand up innocently, “it’s just such a shame that you’re the one that’s got to go through this. Trust me though, it’s not easy being a spectator, seeing you in so much pain is breaking my heart, I can only watch in awe of what an incredible woman you are.”
“You’ve got a good one there, Y/N,” Jisoo called out as she busied herself in the room, paperwork in hand, unable to stop herself tuning into your conversation. “You’d be surprised how many husbands sit back and relax during a time like this.”
“See, you’ve got a good one,” Jungkook continued to joke, tapping lightly against your arm, “can I get that in writing to remind her of this when this is all over?”
“I can change my mind,” Jisoo responded, drawing a light giggle out of you as the two of them continued to exchange innocent threats for a few minutes, until you chose to interrupt.
The mood of the room instantly turned sombre as a loud groan came from you, leaning forwards once again, breathing under the command of your husband. Whilst Jisoo continued to notice how much quicker your contractions came, Jungkook was solely focused on you, counting each time, resting his hands where you needed them, offering his shoulder back for you to rest on as soon as the contraction finished once again.
“I think I’ve decided something,” you whispered across to Jungkook once you’d caught your breath, “we are definitely only having the one child.”
“But I thought we agreed on an army,” he smirked, earning himself a slap against the bicep from you, although with your strength, the strike was pretty weak, even by your own high standards. Still, Jungkook grabbed at his arm, gasping at the sudden strength that had come over you. “Jisoo will tell you, I bet loads of women say that, but once they remember how sexy their husbands are, a quick trip to the bedroom, and suddenly baby number two comes along.”
“Have you ever met a man who makes sex sound so unappealing?” You asked Jisoo before she even had the time to respond to Jungkook’s comment. “It’s rather confident of you to assume that you’re that sexy anyway.”
Rather than answer either of you, Jisoo made her way across to you, asking Jungkook to give the two of you a bit of space as she checked how far dilated you were. You’d counted down almost every single centimetre, as if your little girl enjoyed teasing you before she was even a part of your world. Each time you hoped for the magic number, but each time Jisoo had muttered something else. You’d almost lost onto your last stretch of hope, that was until you looked across, noticing a wry smile etched across her face.
Before she even said the words, you knew exactly what the smile meant. As if your contractions hadn’t made things obvious enough, the expression on her face was the final touch you needed to know that at last that end was somewhat in sight. Once she called Jungkook back across to your side, his eyes locked with yours, the corners of his mouth turning up into a smile, extending his arm out for your hand to intertwine with his. The relief was clear on your face, and in your hold, your body was in turmoil, but now it seemed as if you could finally begin to settle.
You were all too aware that there was a long road ahead of you, but just the thought of pushing appealed to your body and every part of you that was crying out for a rest.
“Ten centimetres,” Jungkook whispered beside you, “I bet that feels pretty good.”
“It feels pretty good,” you smirked, keeping your eyes on him as he sat back down in the chair at your bedside. “I had no idea the body could stretch as big as this, it’s surreal.”
Although he hadn’t taken too close of a look at everything that was going on at the foot of your bed, Jungkook had done enough research to know just how your body was changing. From the very first sign of a bump, Jungkook had waited impatiently for the moment that he finally got to see your little girl come into the world, the final change that would complete what the two of you had dreamt of for so many months.
“I love you,” his voice then whispered, just as your eyes looked away from his and down to your bump, “and our baby, I love our baby too.”
“I love you too,” you smiled, quickly looking back at him, “our little one is the luckiest girl in the world to have you.”
What came over the next few minutes felt like a blur to you, several instructions were sent your way, your body reshuffled with your legs propped up, pillows placed behind your back, and a towel dabbed against your head, but one thing remained, the hold of Jungkook’s hand tightly against yours, refusing to leave your side as the first few pushes began.
“This is ridiculous,” you huffed, just after the first few. You’d hoped for some sort of immediate impact, but your baby made no sign of movement instead. If you hadn’t spent hours laid in the hospital bed, you would have given up there and then, but there was one man that was never going to let you do that.
“Patience,” was all that Jungkook had to say, desperate to try and calm you down as he noticed how flustered you became. His hands pressed against your red cheeks before wiping underneath your watery eyes, failing to withhold the pressures that were placed before you.
Whilst labour was never something you expected to be a walk in the park, you could never have prepared yourself for the overwhelming feelings of pain that you’d end up enduring throughout your labour.
“If I push one more time, my body is going to cave,” you admitted, leaning against the cold metal of the rail against the bed. Jungkook’s head instantly shook, moving his arm around you to pick you back up, holding your back against the palm of his large hand.
“You’re far too strong to give up now,” he smiled, standing up from his chair to press a kiss against the side of your head, “there’s still pain relief if you want it, no one is going to think any less of you if that’s what you choose to do,” he reminded you once again, but still your head shook, you’d had plans for how your labour was going to go, and a natural birth was always top of your list of things that you wanted to see through. “Just hold my hand, and don’t break any of my bones and I promise that we’ll get through this together.”
Your eyes rolled at his warning, pinching especially hard against his hand to keep him on his toes, and make sure that he kept his mouth shut too.
“I’m only messing with you,” he whimpered, shaking at your hand for you to loosen your grip around him. “Just try and keep positive babe, we’ve jumped over too many hurdles over the past day to give up now. This one might just be a little bit bigger, but I know more than anything else in the world that you’re going to get over it.”
Your eyelids slowly fluttered shut, letting go of a shaky breath in the hope that it would keep you so composed. Rather than focus on the pain that came from your bump, your mind focused on the traces that Jungkook ran along the back of your hand, just like you’d done against his only a couple of hours ago.
“I just want to hold her and be done with this,” you continued to vent, opening your eyes back up, flinching slightly at the bright lights that came from all four corners of the room you’d somehow ended up calling home.
“I mean it when I say not much longer this time,” Jisoo smiled from the foot of the bed, perched on a stool, keeping a close eye on proceedings. “It’s natural to feel like you want to throw in the towel, there’s often a bit of a wait between dilation and pushing, not feeling anything can sometimes feel worse than the pain of a contraction.”
“You’re spot on,” you responded, forcing the smallest of smiles to your face, hearing a gentle giggle come from Jungkook. “At least the pain let me know that she was definitely moving.”
As if on cue, your baby began to make her presence known again, with Jungkook rising to his feet once again when he noticed how quickly you shot forwards. His arm reached out across your chest to stop you moving too far forwards, just as Jisoo had advised.
Something about this contraction just felt different for you though, as if your little girl was giving you a sign that she really was on her way. Although you couldn’t feel her drop, the pain certainly did. The smile on your face instantly captured Jungkook’s attention, unsure if he should worry, or be pleased to see a sign of happiness in your expression.
“I can feel her,” you whispered across to him before he even had the chance to ask, “it’s like she’s letting me know she’s on her way Kook.”
“That’s a good thing, right?” He anxiously queried, looking across to Jisoo who’s head nodded. “She really is on her way, our little girl.”
“Our little girl,” you repeated, feeling his hands press to either side of your face, just managing to press the softest of kisses against your puckered lips before another contraction hit. His left arm instantly moved around your waist as his right hand held onto yours, it had become second nature for Jungkook now to step each time that your body called out for him, a murmur of his name was all that he needed to know exactly what you wanted from him, and as another contraction passed, he was relieved when he could sit back down again.
As soon as it passed, both you and Jungkook stared across to Jisoo, desperate for any sort of update she had on how things were going.
“Just keep doing what you’re doing,” she assured you, “plenty of pushes coming up Y/N.”
“Hey,” a deep voice whispered beside you, brushing his thumb back across the pad of your hand, drawing your eyes across to him with the sound of your voice. “It’s going to be alright, we’ve talked about all of this, the two of us are here, and very soon our little girl will be here soon, remember why you’re doing this Y/N.”
“Pushing feels so real,” you slightly chuckled, feeling the beat of your heart quicken in your chest, “are you sure it’s really time to push?”
“Absolutely,” a cheery Jisoo smiled from the foot of the bed, repositioning your legs slightly so that you were a little more stretched out. “When the next contraction comes, I want you to take a big deep breath, and then lots of little pushes, let your body guide you rather than you guide your body. Listen to my voice, and most of all, listen to Jungkook too, he sounds like he has all the right things to say to you.”
“That’s exactly how we got into this position,” you sighed, shooting a glare in his direction.
“Unfortunately, it’s exactly how you’re going to get out of this position too,” Jisoo grinned, shaking her head as Jungkook leaned forwards to try and give her a high five. “Just support your wife,” she smiled, “I’ve spent less then a day with this guy and I’m struggling to see how you’ve managed to put up with him for so many years.”
“Don’t make me regret it,” you called out, just as another contraction came. The mutters of ‘push,’ that came from both of the people beside you instantly set your body in motion, clutching tightly onto the rail, and Jungkook’s hand as you tried to push down as best as you could, grimacing at the pain.
By the time the contraction had passed, you could feel how quickly your bottom lip was beginning to swell, pouting across at Jungkook, who was unable to hide his surprise when he noticed how red your lip was.
“Still beautiful,” he complimented, leaning forwards once again to press a kiss against the reddened skin, “and so strong too. Who knew I managed to marry such a strong woman?” He questioned, receiving no answer from either of you. It came as little surprise to him, instead he grabbed the towel that was beside him and dabbed it gently over your forehead, and your lip too, trying to make the swelling as minimal as possible before you bit down again.
As another contraction soon came around, you couldn’t quite get your head around at how surreal it was suddenly all becoming. You’d sat with your little girl nested in your tummy for two days short of nine months, and now you could slowly feel her making her way down to enter the world. All of the fears and the doubts that you’d had about labour had been torn apart, your dreams had been blown so far out of proportion, no part of what you were doing felt real anymore. But for the two of you, it felt like the best, and worst, experience in the world, the pain had been hard, but slowly it was beginning to feel as if it was worth it for you both.
When the next contraction came around, the sound of Jisoo’s voice stopped you from biting down on your bottom lip, feeling her hand move a little further up your leg, carefully pushing your legs a little further apart, surprising even you by how flexible you suddenly were.
“I can feel something,” you nervously whispered, looking across to Jungkook who was trying to get the best look he could at what was going on from beside you.
“No need to worry,” Jisoo instantly replied to you, “but I can definitely see the first signs of your little girl.”
“Really?” You chuckled, feeling Jungkook’s head turn to look back across at you. His eyes looked at you for permission, as your head slowly nodded, encouraging him to stand up from his seat and walk across, peering over your leg to where the first sightings of your little one’s head could be seen. A quiet gasp came from Jungkook, squeezing gently against your hand, feeling his eyes watering at the sight before him.
“She already looks beautiful,” he whispered up to you, “I can’t believe she’s all ours Y/N.”
“I wish I could see,” you chuckled, trying your hardest to look past your bump, but failing with ease. You couldn’t help but laugh, remembering all the times you’d failed to see your feet, or bend down to change your shoes, only now, at the most important time, your bump had stopped you from getting your first glimpse of your little girl. A small part of you couldn’t help but be slightly envious that Jungkook had such a clear view from beside you of everything that was going on.
However, as soon as your next contraction hit, Jungkook’s attentions were turned straight back to you, sitting back down in a heartbeat as more encouraging whispers came from him. He’d never told you how proud and how in love he was with you than he had done today, but he also knew he could never love you more than the moment you brought his child into the world.
The late nights, early mornings, and everything that came in between during your pregnancy had been hard on you both, but everything that you needed from Jungkook, he did with a smile. He could never appreciate enough how incredible your body was to carry his little girl, to nurture her so perfectly and give her such good health. There was simply never going to be enough that he could do to repay you for everything that you’d given him over the last nine months, and for the rest of his life too.
“Y/N, keep pushing!” Jisoo’s voice called out, snapping you out of the small daydream that you found yourself in. By the sound of her voice, you knew that something significant was happening, with adrenaline the only thing keeping you going, you did as she said, pushing as hard as you could, paying close attention to the sound of Jungkook’s voice, the only thing that had kept you going through out.
“She’s coming,” he whispered, flickering his eyes between you and your baby, noticing how quickly she seemed to be arriving. Your head nodded, repeating his words over and over again in your head, the only boost of motivation that you needed to dig in to somewhere you didn’t know you had, using up every last ounce of energy that you possibly could.
“Kook,” you whimpered, as you felt the contraction begin to collapse again.
“Just one more,” Jisoo then called out.
“You can do it,” he urged, leaning closer in towards you.
Although your head shook, your body still pushed, and soon the cries of your little girl could be heard ringing throughout the room, as tears fell from both yours and Jungkook’s eyes, feeling his hand slip out of yours so that you could collapse down against the bed.
“I love you, you’re incredible,” he chimed, giving you a moment before leaning over you, brushing the hair out of your face, coupled with a lingering kiss against your forehead, ignoring the droplets of tears that fell from his cheeks against your own. “She’s here Y/N.”
In just a matter of moments, Jungkook moves away from your side, replaced with your little girl settling against your bare chest, with Jisoo dabbing away at her to remove the markings of blood, stretching out of her limbs and making sure to clear out her airways.
As your eyes looked down at her for the very first time, your breath was taken by what was before you. “Wow,” was all you could whisper as you studied every fine detail of the bundle you held tightly against your chest. “Look at you,” you soon added, sniffling back the tears that fell.
Jungkook’s hand reached across, wiping underneath your eyes, perching himself on the end of his bed. He used the tip of his thumb to trace over the top of her head, feeling along her arms, staring in awe of how tiny each digit of her hand was. Neither of you could look away from her, all expectation you had had been succeeded, unable to comprehend what you had just endured.
“Our little girl,” Jungkook whispered, leaving a kiss against the top of your head with his words. It had been the saying you’d had for her since the moment you found out it was a girl that you were expecting, and yet somehow neither of you could correlate that the little girl you’d wished for was finally in front of you both.
“Congratulations,” Jisoo spoke after a few moments, scribbling down on some papers attached to her clipboard. “I’ll give you both a second to adjust, you’re new parents after all.”
“We’re parents,” Jungkook muttered in a moment of disbelief, continuing to stare wide-eyed at your daughter, silently reiterating the promises he’d made to her most nights when he laid beside your bump, trying to help you get to sleep. Although she was still attached to you for a moment through the umbilical cord, his body was itching to get his first hold of his little girl, feel the body and the heart he was going to protect for the rest of his life. “Thank you,” he whispered across to you once he finally looked away from her, “it’s never going to be enough, but thank you for being so strong, and for being the best wife, and mum in the world.”
“How can you say that when I’ve only been a mum for five minutes?” You teased, bringing a smile to Jungkook’s face. His eyes rolled at the chuckle that followed your question, knowing if it wasn’t for your little one, he’d be attacking your side in an instant.
“I just know, call it instinct,” he assured you, “and I’m going to make sure that this little girl knows what a special mummy she’s got to. I’ll never let her take you for granted, just like I never will, ever again. I’m in your debt forever, nothing can make up for all of this.”
“You know, we can’t call her our little girl forever,” you hummed, noticing how quickly Jungkook’s eyes lit up at the mention of her name. Several had been exchanged between the two of you, and yet one always seemed to stand out to you both, almost as if it was just meant to be, her name was her destiny.
“Is it still the one that you want?” Jungkook asked, making sure you didn’t have any doubts.
“Just looking at her, she suits it,” you hummed, taking any excuse that you could to get a glance of your daughter. “Don’t you think, it’s perfect for her?”
Jungkook’s head nodded, leaning across your body to press a gentle kiss to the top of her head, treating her as if she was the most delicate thing in the world. As her name fell from his lips for the very first time, Jungkook knew you were right, it was perfect for her, and the perfect name to complete your family too.
“Can you believe we have her forever?” You asked him, brushing your thumb over the top of her head, “we don’t ever have to give this one back, or keep her only for a night. We never have to let her go, she’s ours, always.”
“I don’t think I’ll ever believe that I’ve been so blessed with the two of you,” he giggled in his confession, “every day, my little girl, and my incredible wife, I will love you.”
“She’ll have you wrapped around her finger in no time, I bet,” you laughed, “if she’s anything like you, we might as well enjoy the peace and quiet for now, because she’ll be causing trouble in no time.”
“I hope she takes after you,” Jungkook acknowledged, staring back at you, “everyone will fall in love with her, just like I did with you.”
“Do you still love me after I almost broke your hand?” You teased, staring across at his still slightly reddened hand.
“Y/N, I have never loved you more than I do right now, and I’ll love you more and more every day. You’ve given me the greatest gift, love just isn’t enough.”
“We love you too,” you smiled across to him, feeling his lips peck against yours.
“I’ll never tire of hearing that.”
663 notes · View notes
softyoongiionly · 9 months ago
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based on the time Jungkook said he needed someone to scold him so he’d remember to put lip balm on.
Jungkook’s had a really long day and the only that can make it better, is seeing you. 
Pairing: Jungkook x Reader
Word Count: 5.8k
Genre: fluff, smut, established relationship, jungkook has a man bun idk what else I could possibly want
Warnings: language, explicit smut (18+ only plz), oral (male receiving)
A/N: Hello yes, I am mess. I wrote this in like four hours and it’s unedited but wow wow wow wow I am GOING THROUGH it for Jungkook. Anywayz, I love u. here u go
Jungkook is in a bad mood today.
He’s been awake since 6am, he hasn’t eaten since mid-morning and, he’s been practicing for over 12 hours.
Worst of all, everyone else seems to be in a good mood.  
It’s not that he hates when his hyung's are happy, it’s just that when you’re in a bad mood-  sometimes the shriek of someone’s laughter can feel intrusive.  
“Alright!” Hoseok’s voice hits the practice mirrors and with Jungkook feeling oversensitive, he cringes at the sound of it, “Let’s go again from the top!”
Jungkook sighs through his nose, stretching his sore back for a moment before getting back into formation.
“Jungkook-ah! Push a little harder in the second half ok?!”  
Hoseok is in dance-mode and therefore he has no idea how loud he’s being.
Jungkook purses his lips and nods, taking a deep breath before shaking out his hands.
“Yah! Jungkook?” Hoseok calls, facing the mirror, his eyes searching for Jungkook at the back of the practice room.
“Yeh.” He grunts, barely looking up from the floor.
“Did you hear me?”
He nods, his hands fumbling around in the pockets of his sweatpants, “Push harder in the second half...”
The rest of the boys seem unphased by his uninterested demeanor. They are no stranger to exhaustion.  
“Alright- let’s go.”
For what feels like the 100th time today, Jungkook moves through the routine as if it were second nature. The movements feel robotic and the muscles in his arms are beginning to turn to Jell-O. The strands of his hair are covered with sweat and, he’s thankful for his newly procured undercut for lessening the amount of heat he’d normally feel after working out this long.  
He feels gross though.  
Normally, he enjoys working this hard but today he isn’t feeling it. In fact, the strain between his brows is getting a little painful as he really tries his best not to frown.
The new choreography is intense and as much he likes the challenge- after the 100th time of running through it, he’s starting to get frustrated.
Panting through his nose, he holds his position at the end of the routine before Hoseok finally calls it.
“Yahhhh! That was a lot better huh? You guys did good.” He praises, clapping his hands, “Now go get some water and then we’ll run it again...”
Jungkook sighs hopelessly, letting his head fall back on his shoulders. He cringes at the feeling of sweat collecting on his skin, wanting nothing more than to make it back home to his shower.
Amongst other things...
Grabbing a bottle of water off of the table, Jungkook has to work very hard not to crush the bottle in his hands as he eagerly gulps down what he can. He finishes the bottle in record time and as he reaches for a second one, he pulls his phone out of his pocket to check it.  
Tweety: hiii I hope you’re having a good day! Do you want to takeout tonight? I got caught up at the school and, I didn’t pull anything out.
Jungkook feels his tight chest loosen up a bit as he sees your text come through.
You made a comment one day that he ‘gives off bugs bunny vibes’ and he responded by comparing you to Tweety bird.  
Needless to say, the nicknames are dumb but you guys think they’re cute.  
Bugs: takeout sounds good. I’ll be there late tonight though :/ I hope you had a good day too. Miss u.
Jungkook has just enough time to respond to you before he is wincing at the sound of Hoseok corralling everyone back to the practice floor.
Again, again, again, again, and again...
He’s so tired by the end of the circuit that he’s starting to feel throbbing in his temples. Headaches are a common side effect of over-exertion and just as he is getting ready to beg to go home, they are calling it.
“Ok ok- good job! You’ve worked hard everyone. Let’s rest for a day and then resume on Sunday.”
Jungkook feels his entire body deflate with relief at the last words parading out of Hoseok’s mouth.  
His day is finally over.
He reminds himself to never wear new boots to rehearsal again because he can’t feel the tips of his toes and his fairly certain there are blisters on the of his ankles.  
“Are you riding with me?” Jimin asks him on the way out of the practice room, his voice decorated with exhaustion.
Jungkook doesn’t fully pay attention to his question, his eyes already trained on his phone.
“No, I’m getting my own car.”
Jimin looks confused for a moment before a small smirk comes over his face.
“Are going to see her?”
Jungkook doesn’t respond quick enough, his mouth parted slightly as he types out his message to you.
“Aren’t you worried what people are going to think? You’re over there a lot...”
Jimin isn’t being judgmental with his questioning and Jungkook knows this. He can hear the genuine concern in his voice and understands that his hyung is merely looking out for him.
“I don’t really care what people think anymore.” He answers honestly, ensuring that he keeps his tone as polite as possible.  
Jungkook’s had to worry about the opinions of others since he was 15. As grateful as he is for his career, he is growing tired of being unable to make his own decisions. His gaze hones in on the tattoos covering his fingers and forearms and remembers a time not too long ago where he was required to hide them. Putting a band aids on his own self-expression didn’t feel good and he sort of promised himself that he wouldn’t allow the expectations of others to stop him from doing what he wanted.  
Or seeing who he wanted...
“You’re getting bolder with age.” Jimin notes, somewhat proudly as his eyes flicker over to him, “You really like her, don’t you?”
Tweety: miss u toooooo. I ordered ramen
Bugs: I just got out. I should be there in 20 minutes. I’m so hungry
Jungkook feels his cheeks heat up at Jimin’s question and rather than answer him, he just kind of shrugs, his mouth turned up in a small smirk.  
“Yah, don’t hold out on me-”Jimin bumps his shoulder, tilting his head in an attempt to get him to look his way, “We’ve known each other for how long?”
Jungkook slips his phone back into his pocket and adjusts his bag on his shoulder.
“I think the answer is obvious hyung.”
Jimin rolls his eyes playfully, “If it’s so obvious then why don’t you just say it.”
The two of them lean against the wall of the lobby, waiting on a notification from their drivers that they are outside.
Jungkook bites his lip, in an attempt to reign in the grin that threatens his face.
“I like her.”
Laughter trickles out of Jimin’s lips as he bumps his shoulder, “Why are you shy all of the sudden? Is there something else I don’t know?”
There was something else Jimin didn’t know.  
Jungkook hasn’t told a single soul since it happened.  
He’s so incredibly private and after meeting you, he only has more of an urge to keep things to himself.  
“There’s nothing.” Jungkook mutters, his eyes eagerly looking checking his phone for the driver notification.
“You’re lying to me.” Jimin calls him out, “What is it?”
Jungkook shakes his head, tucking a bit of hair behind his ear. He licks over his lips and immediately regrets the fact that he forgot his Chapstick.
How’s he supposed to kiss you, if his lips are chapped?
“Jungkook-ah, tell me-” Jimin whines, tugging on his sleeve.
He merely snickers finally and shrugs him off, shaking his head, “There’s nothing to tell. Why do you think I’m hiding something from you?”
“Because I’ve known you for almost ten years and I-” Jimin begins before a knowing smirk comes over his face, “Wait- you’ve slept with her haven’t you?”
Jungkook’s eyes widen a bit, taken aback by his bold statement, “Someone’s going to hear you, why are you asking questions like this?”
His hyung giggles, deeply satisfied with his discovery, “You have, haven't you?”
Jungkook feels the threat of a smile come over his face again, “Why do you want to know? It doesn’t matter.”
“It matters-” He shoots him a pointed look, “Because we’re best friends? And I want to know. When did it happen?”
Jungkook is feeling a little bit bolder, unable to help the pride he feels that he was finally able to experience an intimate relationship, “Which time?”
Jimin’s eyes widen before he slaps Jungkook on the arm, “Which time??? You’ve done it more than once?”
“Shhh-” Jungkook whisper yells, his brow furrowing, “We’ve been seeing eachother for 6 months. Why do you look so surprised?”
Jimin chuckles this time, glancing behind him, “I just- I don’t was your first time, wasn’t it? I just thought you’d make a bigger deal of it.”
He shrugs again, a smirk still lingering, “It was a big deal- to us. I thought you guys would just figure it out eventually.”
Ever the nosy one, Jimin slinks a little closer to him, a bit of mischief in his eyes, “It’s fun huh?”
Jungkook just rolls his eyes, brushing him off playfully, “I thought I was supposed to be the youngest.”
Jimin ignores his comment and just looks at him expectantly.
Giving up on holding out, Jungkook finally gives him what he wants and replies.
“It was fun.”
Jimin offers his signature bit of laughter again but before he’s able to interrogate him any further, Jungkook finally gets the notification that his driver is here.
“I’ll see you Sunday, hyung.” Jungkook gives him a short wave before adjusting his bag on his shoulder.
Jimin smirks and flutters his fingers in his direction, “Have fun.”
Jungkook just shakes his head, groaning to himself as he final