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mrsmandalorian · 1 month

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Blueberry Muffins

Part 2 of City Lights, Country Nights- Cowboy!Joel x Techie! f!Reader

A/N: Howdy, everyone! Thank you so much for loving this series! 🫶🏼I am sorry for the delay in this part. This is my first time writing smut lol. I plan to add parts to this story and other sweet Pedrito stories. I hope you have a great weekend! Also, there will be more fluff in this series!

Summary: After an early night, you and Joel decide to have something sweet for breakfast before ranch chores.

Series Masterlist

Word Count: 2.6k

Warnings: 18+ mdni, reader is able-bodied, no outbreak AU, kitchen smut!!!, f!oral receiving, come eating, creampie, major dirty talk, kinda praise kink, groping, unprotected piv sex, no use of y/n

The rustle of blankets and movement was the reason you woke up. As you squint your eyes, you see Joel sitting up and checking his watch. You silently examine him: his hair is touseled to one side, and his clothes all wrinkled. He mumbles a ‘shit” under his breath as he glances back over at you. The sun was not yet up, but the morning dew laid a layer on the grass and surfaces.

“Good morning, beautiful,” he says in his raspy morning voice once he sees you awake. “It’s about six o’clock, darling. I guess we slept outside last night.” He rubs your legs as you lean up and stretch, leaning over to kiss one another.

“Good morning, cowboy,” you whisper back to him as you pull away from the kiss, leaning against his shoulder. “What’s the plan today?” You knew he had work around the ranch. It was fun to follow him around and help where he let you. You never expected to learn how to milk cows, especially not goats. Joel helped you get out of your comfort zone (in many ways…).

“I was thinking we could get something sweet and a cup of coffee before I ask for your help around the ranch, darling.” He meets your eyes as he speaks to you with a slight smirk and a raised eyebrow. It was not just any look. It was THE look. The one that made your thighs squeeze together and goosebumps cover your skin. ‘Something sweet’ was not a pastry; it was you. You have two choices for your response: act innocent or speed up the process and skip the foreplay.

“Would you like me to make some blueberry muffins?” You act innocent to his look as you enter the kitchen. Who could skip foreplay with this handsome cowboy? You two have not had sex in almost two weeks. It wasn’t uncommon for the two of you to sext each other. This man had purchased an iPhone because it was the sole reason for getting sexy FaceTime and pictures from you. You hear him follow directly behind you. “ I think we have all the stuff to make some,” you say as you look in the pantry, bending over a little extra, and you feel his eyes stalk you from behind. This was going to be fun.

Joel clears his throat as he starts the coffee pot and turns on soft music as you gather all the ingredients and start the oven. He still stalks you with his eyes as you mix all the ingredients into a bowl. He is suspiciously walking closer to you as you mix everything. Soon, you feel his large hands wrap around your waist and his face nuzzled into your neck. “They smell good, darling,” he mumbles against your ear as he starts to leave a small kiss down your neck. His hands move up to cup your breast, which causes you to let out a little whimper. He presses his hips into your backside to trap you against the cabinet. Your mixing slows down as his hand wanders to play with the edge of your shirt. “Why did you slow down? Do you need some help, baby girl?”

His hot breath on your neck made your spine arch causing your ass to dig more into his crotch. You could feel his growing member against your backside, biting your lip as you become a little playful. You grind your hips against him, making his hands grip you harder and chuckle. “You little fucking tease,” his accent becomes thicker with the sexual tension making the air feel tight. You couldn’t even focus on the task at hand with his member hardening against you and his hands wandering underneath your shirt to your bare chest. His hands pawing at your breast, which earned a small moan from your throat.

“I do need help if we want to continue this, sir,” you say back to him, causing his hands and hips to stop. “Just help me pour this into the cups, and” Before you could finish your sentence, Joel had turned off the oven and placed the bowl of mix somewhere else. In a flash, he had his hands on your hips and lifted you against the counter. His eyes darkened as he gripped your neck and passionately kissed you, pulling your shirt over your head. His eyes are focused on your bare chest, grabbing one of the breasts with one hand as the other hand goes under your waist to move you more into his hips. He dips his giant finger into the muffin mix, smearing the cold mix onto your sensitive nipples. You let out a small moan as the cold air and mix makes your nipples harden.

“Open,” his raspy accent commands you as he places his dirty finger in front of your mouth. You do as you are told to do so and suck hard on his finger, meeting his dark eyes with your own doe-like eyes. The intensity of the interaction causes Joel to let out a low growl as he leans over and licks your dirty nipples clean. One of his hands palms at the other tit as he sucks and bites the other and vice versa. The attention to your breast makes you arch your body more into him as you let out a loud whimper, “Joel, please,” you beg the cowboy.

The desperate look in your eye and the sound in your voice make him smirk. “Oh darling, I’m going to help you,” his hand runs down your exposed belly to the edges of your shorts. He watches how your body reacts to him as he bites his lip, “good girl, darling.” Your shorts and underwear were removed in an instant. Joel pushes you back a little, moving a few dish towels under you to make it more comfortable on the counter. “Fuck, I’ve missed this sweet, sweet pussy,” he worships you as he bends downs a little to get a better look. Blowing a hot breath on your soaking wet slits, you gasp and cover your face with your hands to hide the pleasure. You were so desperate for him and his body as you moved your hips closer to his face.

The act caused Joel to let out a low chuckle and smirk at your current state. He was just as desperate as you were for him to fuck you. “Such a good girl for me,” He praises as his hands caress your thighs, pulling your pussy closer to his face. He teases you with one quick lick against your folds, letting out a slight moan as he does. This man LOVED pleasuring you. He treated it like his favorite job, and he did it fucking perfectly.

“Joel, please,” You let out as you whimper, pressing your throbbing cunt into his face. The action caused his nose to hit your clit, which made you yelp in pleasure. You throw your head down as you glance down at the man between your legs. He met your gaze with a smirk and started viciously licking your cunt as he kept eye contact. His tongue knew what the hell it was doing. Your body reacted to him with your legs wrapping around his broad shoulders, “Joel! Fuck me, please!”

Your words cause him to smirk, “Oh, I fucking plan on it, darling. I just want to taste and play with this sweet pussy first,” He chuckles, standing up and leaning over you. He grabs your backside and pulls you in a longing kiss.

You reach down as he continues to kiss you more intensely, rubbing his erection membe. Joel lets out a frustrated breath as he pulls away from your lips. Your hands struggle with his belt and jeans. He reaches down to assist you with one hand and pulls your hair back. “Such a desperate girl for my cock,” he says as he leaves himself in his underwear. You can see the stain of precum on his dark underwear.

You nod in agreement with his statement, which causes him to smirk at you. “Tell me that you are, darling.” He whispers to you as he runs his fingers through the back of your hair, tugging slightly on it.

“Please, Joel! Fuck me, please,” you begged again as you let out a whimper. He seems to be satisfied by your answer, pulling down his underwear. You grinned like crazy as you reached down to touch him. He grabs your hands in one of his hands, holding them together so you can't move them. He kisses down your body from your neck to your stomach, and he shows a little extra love to your breasts. His fingers, on the not occupied hand, ran down the same path and gently caressed your cunt. You whimpered out as he let one enter you, “Joel!” You fought back slightly as he continued to finger you, eventually riding his fingers to the same rhythm.

“Such a good girl,” he praises and releases your hands, reaching to play with your nipples as his other hand pleases you. He continues his rhythm and positions until your body starts to react to your soon-to-be orgasm.

“Joel, please may I come?” You asked him as you tried not to already come all over his fingers. He gives you a nod with a big smirk as he continues to fuck you with his fingers. You leaned back against the counter and covered your face with your hands as you let out moans coming all over his fingers.

Joel pulls out his fingers from your throbbing cunt, putting them inside his mouth. He lets out a satisfied noise as he makes eye contact with you. It does not take long for him to line his giant cock up to your throbbing cunt. He looks at you for consent, “fuck me, please!” You respond with.

He enters you with a loud groan from him, holding onto your hips with his rough hands. He thrust hard and quick into you, causing you to cry out in a moan. “You were made for my cock, angel,” he groans as he thrust hard into you. It did not take long for Joel to be gripping your hips tight. He uses one of his hands to play with your very sensitive clit, “fuck, I love you.”

You could tell that Joel was not going to last longer as his thrust started to be a little more sloppy as he continued. “Come in me, Joel,” you encourage him as he grunts in pleasure. He closes his eyes as he applies more pressure onto your clit as he speeds up his fingers and hips. You feel your sensitive cunt throb hard in the need to release as he keeps his rhythm on his thrust.

You both move your hips together in unison as the air is filled with moans, groans, and skin slapping. “Fuck, darling. Going to have me coming like a teenager,” he says loudly as his legs start to twitch and his grip tightens a little on your hip.

“Yes, Joel. I’m going to come with you,” you moan back at him. You both ride out your releases together as he lazily thrusts himself inside of you. He takes his time to pull out of you slowly. Taking a second to recover and leaning down to give you a sweet kiss.

“Holy fuck, darling,” he chuckles and looks down at you as you lay limp on the counter. “That was animalistic.”

You giggle and blush at him, leaning up and catching your breath. “It was, baby. Made up for last night, old man.” You joke at him as you wink at him. He wraps his arms around you again.

“Could an old man do that or this?” He asks and picks you up, causing your legs to wrap around him. You roll your eyes at him, laying your head on his chest as he carries you into the bathroom. He sets you down on the counter and turns on the shower. “Let's get you cleaned up, and we can finish breakfast.”

“You’re still an old man,” you joke as you get down to get into the shower with him to rinse off. “That sounds good, baby. Only if you make me some bacon.” You say as you lean against his chest inside the shower. He nods in response and kisses your head, helping you wash off.

Another thing this man took seriously was aftercare. He always rubbed your body and gave you plenty of kisses and love after any type of sex. “I love you, my sweet old man,” you say as you grin at him.

You both help each other wash off and dry off once ready. He goes into the bedroom to get you out a pair of your jeans and one of his old t-shirts that you usually wear to work, along with his favorite undergarments. He gives you a smirk after you put on the bra and panties. “I have a very sexy picture of this set,” he smirks as he checks you out more.

“You don’t delete those? Where do you keep them?” you panickedly asked him as you threw your hands on your hips. What was he thinking of having those still on his phone? What if one of the girls or Tommy was helping him with his technology issues and saw your dirty pictures? “I thought we talked about this, Joel.”

“Why would I delete such a masterpiece? I put them in some hidden folder Tommy told me about. He didn’t see anything, but I asked him what he did with his.” He says as he starts to get dressed.

“Let me see! How secure is it?” You grab his phone and look for the said folder. He holds his phone but not in a suspicious way as he lets you watch him show you where it is. He opens the folder to find close to fifty photos of you in your undergarments or birthday suit from pictures you sent to him, bedroom activity photos, or sexy FaceTime times he screenshotted. “you dirty fucking dog.”

He rolls his eyes and lets you look through it. It was hidden well under your birthday passcode. You thought it was a confidence boost that he enjoyed viewing you like that. He has plenty of clothed and regular photos of you as well.

After you joke around together, Joel returns to the kitchen to start breakfast. You finish up getting ready for the day as you smell the coffee and bacon from the kitchen. You follow the smell into the room as you watch Joel cooking your eggs and bacon. He hears you walk into the room, turning around with a grin. “Here’s some coffee, darling. The rest of the breakfast should be finished in a few. I put the muffins in the oven, by the way.” He smirked at you as he pulled the bar chair out so you could sit down with your coffee.

Life with Joel Miller was heavenly. It seemed too good to be true sometimes, but it never stopped being good. You have been through some ups and downs in your relationship, but he made sure all the times you had together were perfect.

After breakfast was finished and eaten, Joel got both sets of boots out. You both put them on and headed out the door. Outside, Sassy was lying in her favorite spot under the patio. She let out a happy bark as she ran up to Joel to go to work. The two of you walked out to the barn to start a half day of chores around the ranch. Time passes quickly as you both fool around and work together well.

Your time with the sexy cowboy was the happiest that you had ever been in your life.

thank you again for reading! let me know what you guys think! 🫶🏼

#cowboy!joel x reader #joel miller imagine #joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal #joel miller #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal imagine #joel miller smut

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crazyunsexycool · 11 months

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My little love

Chapter 20

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Word count: 9.4K (how did this happen?”

Warnings: angst, a little bit of fluff, physical attack toward a child, mentions of cuts and bruises (nothing graphic), reader’s mom, cursing, protective Bucky, Steve being Steve

A/N: I am both so excited and slightly sorry for this! Don’t hate me but we see the reader’s family for the first time and learn why she isn’t close to any of them except for Ed!

Series Masterlist

Ch. 19

The first few days back home were a big adjustment. There were no more early mornings to take Henry to a lab. No afternoon strolls to play with goats or explore a place you’ve never been too. Everyone was happy though. The old family routine was back in place with the exception of watching over Lottie more than necessary in case of a vision. Henry did start having a few more nightmares as he remembered some of the things hydra had him do but Bucky was there every single night to help him.

The most exciting part about being back home is being able to plan Charlotte’s fourth birthday party. You and Bucky had decided to keep it small, just the team. Through the week and a half leading up to it you had to remind Tony multiple times that there would be no huge parties. He would pout but agree nonetheless. Still you suspected that he was up to something.

The theme you decided on you found while late night scrolling through Pinterest. When you showed Bucky the idea he agreed immediately while he laughed. The party would be four-nado themed. It was more as a joke for the adults than anything else. Since Charlotte was a force to be reckoned with. No one in her path was safe, she could melt hearts with a smile and wrap anyone around her little finger with her sweet personality.

Now Lottie wasn’t really sure what was going on; she was just happy to help decorate. With the team done for the day with mission debriefs and paperwork everyone gathered at one of the shared living spaces. The birthday girl wore a shirt that said four-nado, a cute skirt and pigtails. While you had shirts for you, Bucky and Henry that said storm chaser. The only person you were waiting on was Steve. After he finally got back to you saying he was just a few minutes away the small party had started. Just like he said he was in the living room a few minutes later.

“Steebie!” Charlotte ran and jumped into his arms as if she hadn’t seen him in years.

“Here’s my best girl.”

“What the hell took you so long?” You asked.

“Well-“ he scratched the back of his neck as he blushed. “I have a bit of a surprise.”

“What did you do?”

“Who? is the better question.” Clint said with a smirk from his place on the couch.

“Steve?”

“I’d like you to meet someone.”

You narrowed your eyes at him as he turned and waved someone in. She was tall and slender. Long strawberry blonde hair and fair skin.

“Everyone, this is Julie. Julie this is well… everyone. This is Charlotte, my best girl, and it’s her birthday. These are her parents and my closest friends Bucky and Y/N.”

“Best girl?” She sounded annoyed or maybe bothered by the term. “Sometimes I forget you’re so old.” She turns to you now. “It’s uh- nice to meet you. I’ve heard so much about you.”

“Really? We haven’t heard a word about you.” Steve gives Bucky a light hearted glare.

The whole team was surprised. Never in all of the years since knowing Steve had you even heard him talk about a date. Now he was here bringing some random woman to your daughter’s birthday party. You and Bucky looked at each other with the same displeasure on your faces. Unfortunately for Steve and everyone else in the room Lottie was the first to state her dislike of this new person.

“Don’t wike it. Bad Steebie.” Lottie said as she began to cry and reach out for anyone who would take her. That was an immediate red flag. Lottie likes everyone and is open to meeting new people. So her trying to get away from someone she had never met before made you feel uneasy. “Don’t wike it.” She said again as she pointed at Julie.

Bucky moved away from a very confused Steve and his date. Lottie continued to cry until Bucky just left the room.

“Is that why it’s a tornado theme? She seems like a handful. I’d just have a nanny if it were me.” Julie tried to joke but it fell flat.

Steve looked at you like a lost puppy unsure of what to do. Should he leave with Julie or stay and wait until Charlotte calmed down?

“Let me go make sure she’s ok. Don’t go anywhere. Come on Henry.”

Steve motioned for Julie to sit while you left to find Bucky. He introduced the rest of the team. The others, Nat and Clint especially, kept their eyes on the stranger.

“So how did you two meet?” Tony broke the silence. He was already running a background check on her.

“He was leaving the art shop just as I was leaving the bookshop in town. We ran into each other. Then Steve invited me for coffee.”

“Really? You must be really special to get the attention of our very dear Captain.”

“Tony.” Steve throws a warning glance his way.

“Oh come on old man I’m just teasing.”

“How long have you been seeing each other?” Sam asked, equally as surprised that his friend hadn’t mentioned anything.

“About a month already.”

The silence was deafening and Steve felt like an idiot for bringing Julie to the party. It wasn’t helping that everyone kept looking from him to Julie and back. Worst of all Charlotte was upset on her birthday.

****

You and Bucky walk back out with Charlotte holding both of your hands and Henry at Bucky’s side.

“Alright, she’s calmed down enough. Why don’t we sit so that we can have dinner.”

Everyone moved from the living room to the dining room. Nat and Clint sat side by side, whispering amongst themselves and bringing Wanda into it when she sat next to Clint. Everyone else took their usual spots with Lottie being right in the middle with you on one side, Henry on the other and Bucky next to Henry. Unfortunately that means that Steve and his date were right across from the four of you. At first the only thing that could be heard was the plates being passed along the table and the cutlery against the plates. It wasn’t until Henry made Charlotte giggle that the tension in the room eased up a bit. You gave Steve a small smile but he just looked upset.

The dinner goes better than expected, with Lottie only glaring in Julie’s direction once in a while. Wanda was kind enough to bring the cake out and everyone sang happy birthday to Lottie which made her giggle. She blew out the candles perfectly. Bucky sat with her days in advance to make sure she did it right. After cake and pictures everyone went back to the living room. The mood was lighter and the party games you prepared were being played.

Gifts were being given to Charlotte. Putting aside the issue with Steve’s date it was obvious the birthday girl was having the time of her life. She was currently pulling a baby doll out of a box.

“So pwetty.” She says as she examines it carefully. Then Lottie runs to Sam and gives him a hug. “Tank you, Sammie.” Lottie says with a bright smile.

“You are welcome, sweet Angel.”

You hear a small scoff coming from Julie and you turn to look at her. She averts her eyes when she notices you looking at her and tries to mask her irritation but it wasn’t working. You wanted her gone but you also felt bad for Steve. Turning back to Charlotte you watched her open another gift with Bucky’s help. Then she ran to Bruce to hug and thank him.

“I’ll be right back, I forgot her gift.” Steve says and quickly walks out of the living room.

“Mama, look.” Lottie holds up another gift and smiles.

You grab your camera and start snapping pictures. Henry sits with Nat as he watches his sister play. He’s laughing at something she’s said. Everyone is starting to relax and joke even more so no one notices Julie slip away and leave in the same direction Steve had.

After all the gifts were opened and Lottie had thanked everyone individually. The team begins to joke around and use Charlotte’s new toys. Tony goes off on a rant pointing out design flaws and that he could make better toys. You and Bucky take a moment to pick up the wrapping paper and go throw it out. No one noticed Charlotte walking away in search of Steve.

****

“Steebie?” Charlotte called out as she wandered through the empty hallway. There was no fear in Lottie as she went further into the apartment section of the compound. She had been back and forth multiple times and knew her way around. “Steebie.” She called out again this time a bit louder. Lottie was a girl on a mission to find her favorite person.

Lottie’s hand glided over the glass walls as she went further down the hallway. The only place on her mind was Steve’s apartment, which was up one floor. Lottie ran when she saw the elevators and pushed the button, happily waiting for the doors to open. When they do she’s face to face with the one person she’d be happy to never see again, Julie.

“Oh for fucks sake.” She looks down at Charlotte and rolls her eyes.

“Don’t wike.”

“Too bad.”

Julie walks out of the elevator forcing Lottie to back up. She tilts her head back all the way to be able to look up at the stranger.

She starts to look around panicking. “Mama.” She calls out as the vision she had in Wakanda starts to turn into a reality. Lottie is very much aware of what’s going to happen next.

“Mama,” Julie mocks Lottie as she calls for you. She could see the fear in Lottie’s eyes and she just smiled. “You are such a spoiled little brat.”

“Dada. Steebie.”

“I’ll make sure Steve stays far away from you.” Julie crouches so that she is eye level with Lottie and grabs her face, her nails digging into Lottie’s cheeks. “Steve doesn’t even love you.”

“Am Steebie’s best girl.” Charlotte says after pulling away. She pushes Julie and with her strength she manages to not only make her lose balance but to be thrown across the small space and against the wall. Lottie makes a run for the hallway she just walked through but Julie gets in her way.

“I’m going to teach you a lesson on respecting people.”

*****

“Where’s Charlotte?” You asked the moment you walked back into the living room. “And where’s Julie?”

You didn’t even wait for a response as you moved to go look for Lottie. Bucky right behind you and the others went to search in different areas.

“Friday, where is Charlotte?”

“She is by the elevators Sergeant Barnes.”

You run down the hallway and as you turn the corner you’re horrified by the scene unfolding in front of you.

“Come here you fucking brat.” Julie says as she moves towards Charlotte and grabs her arm harshly. Lottie screams in pain and grabs at the hand grabbing her.

“Let her go before I end you.”

Julie spins around at the sound of your voice. She did it so quickly and with such force that she pulled Charlotte with her and straight into one of the glass walls. The impact causes it to shatter and you see red.

Bucky asks Friday to get everyone here while he runs towards Charlotte to get her out of the broken glass. The cries of your daughter only spur you on as you pin Julie against the wall.

“Are you fucking stupid?”

“She’s a brat, she pushed me into the wall with her freaky strength.”

“She’s a child and you’re fucking dumb for even thinking about putting your hands on her.” You say as you pull back and connect your first with her face.

One punch is all you managed to get before you’re pulled away. It doesn’t stop you from trying to grab her again and teach her a lesson for even looking at your sweet Angel wrong.

“Y/N, you have to calm down, Charlotte needs you.” Steve says as he pulls you further back.

“Get this bitch out of here.”

“I’m going to sue you and I’m going to take everything from you.”

“Yeah, good luck with that. I’ve already found all of your dirty little secrets and my lawyers can bury you in paperwork for the rest of your life.” Tony spits back.

“Get her out of here now!”

Nat moves to grab Julie’s arm and pulls her toward the elevator. Julie tries to get away from Nat and grab at you.

“You stupid bitch.”

Nat yanks her back and pulls her into the elevator.

“No, you Bitch.” Charlotte screams back in your defense between tears before the elevator door closes.

Everything was out of control. Charlotte’s birthday was ruined, she had been hurt, you were beyond angry and everyone was unsure of what to do next.

“Come here sweet Angel, let mama fix you up. Come on Henry.” You said as you took her from Bucky and left.

Steve’s heart was beating wildly out of his chest. He wanted to follow you just to make sure Lottie was ok. As soon as he took his first step Bucky stopped him and shook his head.

“I just want to make sure she’s ok.”

“She went through glass Steve of course she’s not ok. Just wait until I call you. Maybe make sure that crazy bitch is actually gone.” Bucky says before leaving.

Everyone starts to slowly and quietly leave while Steve just stands there unsure of what to do. His phone rings, breaking him out of the unfocused haze he was in.

“What do you want?” His tone was cold and full of anger.

“Your friend broke my nose. Aren’t you going to do anything about it?” Julie whined over the phone.

“I did do something. I got her off of you before she did more damage. You’re welcome.”

“She can’t go around hitting people. And your other friend threatened to make me disappear just because of what happened with the kid.”

“You hurt her daughter, what do you think she was going to do? Let you do it? Lose my number.” Steve snaps at her, deciding to ignore the comment about Nat.

“You’re breaking up with me because of a brat? Are you serious?”

“I’m breaking up with you because you showed me your true colors today. And she isn’t a brat, she’s a sweet kid.” He hangs up the phone and crushes it in his hands as it begins to ring again.

The elevator doors open and Nat walks back out as if nothing had happened. She pats his shoulder as she walks by him.

“I’ll go make sure Lottie’s ok and I’ll let you know. Why don’t you go up to your apartment?”

“Nat…” Steve’s eyes watered, he was overwhelmed with the whole situation. Never in his life did he think something like this could happen. Especially to Charlotte and because of him. Nat pulls him into a hug and he’s grateful but he wishes it was you or Bucky. He wanted to know neither of you were angry with him.

“Go, I promise to find you as soon as I know.”

Steve nods and turns towards the elevators. Shoulders slumped and head hanging low.

“It’s ok my sweet Angel, you’re safe. I just need to clean you up.” You murmured as you comforted a still crying Charlotte.

Your blood was boiling as you looked down at the cuts and bruises all over her face and arms. It was probably going to be a long night since she didn’t like the medbay but it was necessary.

“Henry, could you help me with your sister?”

He had watched everything happen since he followed you and Bucky. Currently he was shifting in and out of a translucent form. That only happened when he was overwhelmed emotionally.

“Are you going to hurt her because of what happened?”

“Of course not honey, she didn’t do anything wrong. I’m going to clean these because if I don’t then she can get sick and we don’t want that. But I need you to sit with her because she isn’t going to like it.”

With a pout of his own Henry gets up on the hospital bed. Following your instructions to sit back and hold his sister in his lap.

“Now Charlotte I have to clean all of these ok? It’s going to hurt a little but mama isn’t doing it on purpose. I don’t want to hurt you, ok?”

“Ok.” She says through stuttered breath.

Just as you put on a glove Bucky walks in. In his posture alone you can see he’s furious. It doesn’t help that he’s pacing back and forth and for a moment you remember his days as the winter soldier.

“Bucky,” you try to get his attention. “James.” His eyes snap to yours. “I need you to calm down or get out.”

“Aren’t you angry?”

“Extremely. But you’re scaring the kids and I can’t have that in here right at this moment.”

Bucky immediately softens his expression as he looks towards his babies. He walks over and sits at the other side of the bed.

“What do you need me to do?”

“Just be here with us.” You say as you begin to numb the areas that have small shards of glass.

Then your attention went to cleaning up the other cuts. They were small enough that they’d be gone in a few hours. Henry asks a thousand questions about what you’re doing which helps him stay distracted. After some crying, promises of more cake and a sleepover you got Lottie all patched up. Henry holds her hand as they walk out of the room followed by you and then Bucky.

“There’s the birthday girl.” Sam said.

The rest of the team cheered as Lottie and Henry got closer to the waiting room. Lottie looks around the room and pouts but walks toward Nat.

“Uppies?” She asks quietly and Nat picks her up happily.

“That was intense.” Bruce speaks up.

“Yeah, she’s gone right?”

“She’s gone.”

“She was insane. I mean how do you willingly hurt a kid like that?” Sam chimes in.

“Is bitch.” Lottie added and the talking ceased. Immediately the team starts to snicker and Lottie smiles.

“Don’t laugh. Lottie you can’t say that word, it’s a bad word.”

“Mama say it.” She points out as she looks at her father.

“Yeah but mama is a grown up and she shouldn’t have said it either.” Bucky tells his daughter.

“Sammie say it. And Buce say it. And to-“

“Ok kid that's enough. Maybe we can teach you that you don’t snitch on your uncles.” Tony cuts her off.

“Ok, this birthday has gotten out of hand. Let’s just call it a night and be thankful that that evil woman is out of our lives.”

“Bitch is bye bye?”

“Charlotte Elise Barnes.”

“What dada?” She smiles up at him and he can’t help but smile back.

“Don’t say that word anymore.”

“Kay. Can habe sleepover?”

“Yes we can, my sweet Angel. Say goodnight to everyone.” You take her from Nat before muttering. “I can’t believe her birthday was ruined.”

“Isn’t it a great thing that I planned a birthday bash for her on Saturday then?”

“I’m sorry what?”

“Saturday, birthday bash for our sweet Angel here. She deserves it. It’s going to be a pool party. I have everything handled and I even got the kiddo a new bathing suit.” Tony smiled once he finished talking.

“You know what, it’s fine with me. She deserves a do over.”

“Great because I already received the rsvps so it would have been very awkward.”

“Who is coming to this?”

“The Bartons, the Wilsons, and any agent that has kids.”

“Ok. We are leaving now.” You say and walk away to head up to your apartment.

After some quick showers and changing into fresh and warm pajamas the four of you had piled onto your bed. While trying to make up for the disastrous birthday party you let Lottie pick a movie to watch. Beauty and the Beast specifically, what a surprise. She fell asleep first, then Henry and surprisingly Bucky. You however could not even close your eyes as you stared at the ceiling.

There was one thing you had to do before you could even consider sleeping. With your attention on keeping Charlotte safe and then cleaning up her wounds you hadn’t stopped to think about Steve. Knowing how much he loved the kids, the guilt must be gnawing at him. You look over at the three sleeping forms, Henry laying on top of his father and Lottie tucked into his side, you get out of bed quietly and head to the only place Steve could possibly be.

****

You’ve heard it countless times, the sound of a punching bag ripping was unmistakable now. It was a sound that was burned into your brain from every time you’d found Steve in a gym. Late night sessions only meant one thing, he was sliding deep into a dark corner of his mind with feelings he didn’t know to express. You waited patiently at one of the benches as he hooked up another bag. His movements stopped before he began his assault on the bag again. Steve reluctantly takes the empty space beside you, the silence and the tension is awkward between you. You look over his features and know he’s already punishing himself more than necessary.

“So that was fucking wild.” You murmured. “Would you have visited me in prison if I killed her?”

“No.”

You look up at him surprised.

“I’d be planning your escape.”

You smile but he looks defeated. Still you wait patiently. After years of friendship you learned that Steve will talk about his emotions when he’s ready. There was no need to push.

“How is she? Is she ok? Was there any serious injury?”

“She’s fine, asleep. Most of the cuts are already gone.” You assured Steve and patted his back.

“How did Julie even get her in that hallway?”

“Yeah about that. You aren’t going to like the answer.”

Steve finally looks at you. His expression was a mixture of guilt and sadness.

“What is it?”

“Charlotte was at the elevators because she was looking for you. I saw the surveillance footage. Julie walked out of the elevator and cornered her. Told her some very untrue things and then Bucky and I showed up.” You sigh as you remember the footage. “Lottie was scared and she called out for us and then she called out for you.”

“I am so sorry.” He said, slumping forward and leaning his forearms on his thighs. “I was so stupid thinking she would be good for me. She was so sweet when we first met.”

“Steve, you didn’t do anything wrong, except maybe not tell me you were dating someone. Why didn’t you?”

“I didn’t want to take attention away from everything going on with the kids while you were in Wakanda. I thought by bringing her to the party she could see what my life was like and she could see who matters the most to me.”

“Steve, I’ll always have time for you. I couldn’t even go to bed because I knew you were upset. Now I know something else is bothering you, what is it?”

“I feel like I’m falling behind.” He admits and in moments like this you’re very grateful that your friendship has progressed enough that neither of you had to dance around your feelings. “Remember that conversation we had when we worked at Shield? About dating and wanting a family?”

It took you a moment but you remembered.

“Yeah. What about it?”

“I wasn’t ready then, I thought I was ready now. But I was wrong, so fucking wrong. I let my want of starting a family cloud my judgment. She isn’t a great person to begin with and now knowing I can’t even protect a child from getting hurt because of me… Lottie probably hates me and the worst was she tried to warn me.”

“Well, do you know what the best part about having kids is?”

Steve just shakes his head.

“They tend to forgive easily, especially those they love. And if there’s one thing everyone knows is that that little girl loves you so much.” You say as you look from him to the door.

He turns his head just in time to watch Charlotte walk in. She wore her princess pajamas and was holding on to her pink teddy bear. Still sleepy and hair a mess she slowly got closer to the pair of you until she stood in front of you with a silent demand to be picked up. You turned her to face Steve. He was even more of a mess now that he could see the bruises and the few cuts that were still in place.

“What are you doing up and wandering around by yourself?”

“Wanted mama.”

You hum as you play with Lottie’s hair. Her focus though was on Steve, she looked almost sad as she stared at him.

“Are you ok sweetheart?” He asked after a moment. Lottie sighed at the question.

“Am steebie’s best girl?”

The question was asked shyly and with much more apprehension than a four year old should possess. The same question was enough to bring a super soldier that has seen enough war to last various lifetimes to his knees.

“Of course you’re my best girl. You always will be. No matter what anyone else says.” Steve takes Charlotte from you and brings her into a gentle hug. When he pulls back, Steve looks down at her. “I’m so sorry Charlotte.”

“Steebie is good. Lobe Steebie. No wike…”

“Don’t like what, sweet Angel?”

Charlotte looks at Steve and back at you and sighs before she whispers. “Bitch.”

Steve’s eyes go wide and you cover your mouth to hide the smile.

“Charlotte, your father said not to say that word.”

She looked around the empty gym and back at you before she shrugged. “Dada seeping.”

Steve laughs for the first time since he showed up for the party.

“Don’t laugh, she’ll think it’s ok to say it.”

“I’m sorry.” Steve shook his head before placing a kiss on Lottie’s forehead. “I love you too, sweetheart.”

Lottie yawns and blinks slowly up at Steve with a sleepy and sweet smile.

“I think we should get to bed.”

“Yeah.”

“Steve

“Yeah?” He says as he gives Charlotte back to you.

You deserve all of the happiness in the world. You’ll find your person when the time is right and then you’ll have everything you ever wanted.”

“If I could get just a fraction of what you and Bucky have, I’d be happy.”

“You’ll have a love that rivals ours.” You smile at him. “Now come on, you need your rest too. By the way, did you know Tony was throwing a birthday bash on Saturday for Lottie?”

He gives you a sheepish smile as you get into the elevator. You just shake your head.

“You should be happy that you’re my best friend.”

“Trust me I am. I never want to be on the other side of your protective mama bear side.”

“Good. Now I’m gonna get her to bed. Goodnight Steve and do me a favor.”

“Anything.”

“Don’t blame yourself for any of this, I know she doesn’t.”

“I’ll try. Goodnight.”

****

You walk back into the bedroom to find Henry and Bucky just as you left them, or so you thought. The moment you lay down with Charlotte tucked into your side Bucky turns his head toward you.

“How is he?”

“Better now, I hope. You know how he is. He blamed himself for what happened.” You whispered.

“I’m guessing seeing Lottie also helped him.”

“Yup, I’m surprised you didn’t freak out when she wasn’t in bed.”

“I asked Friday, she told me Lottie was heading your way. Was she ok seeing Steve?”

“Yeah, you know she’d kick us to the curve if it meant spending time with him.”

He chuckles at that before finding your hand and intertwining his fingers with yours.

“You were amazing today. With everything, not just the incident. I love you.”

“I love you more.”

Saturday rolled around faster than you would have liked. But the day was bright and hot, perfect for a pool party. Or in this case a water park because you should have known better than to assume a pool party for Tony was just using the pool. He had rented out as many inflatable water slides, bounce houses, ball pits, smaller pools and anything else water related he could. Game booths were set up to one side, a DJ was already playing songs. There were water guns and water balloon stations everywhere as well as towels for everyone. Tony had even gone as far as having extra swimsuits available for those who needed them. There were all kinds of food trucks and to top it all off a smaller version of the petting zoo he’d brought last time. The most important part of it though was the goat pen. All of the goats had on a version of the team's suits. It was ridiculous but you knew Lottie would love it.

The team stood to the side watching the birthday bash come to life as the guest walked from the parking lot to the entrance of the party.

You redid Henry’s messy little man bun to make sure he didn’t have to worry about getting his long hair in his face. Bucky was holding onto Charlotte who wore the bathing suit Tony got for her. A one piece bathing suit that looked like Belle’s yellow dress. Her hair was up in pigtails and she wore a sash that said birthday girl on it. She even had yellow water shoes to complete the look.

“Are you ready to have fun at your birthday party?” Tony asked Lottie.

“Is mine?” Lottie asked, wonderstruck at everything that was laid out before her.

“Of course it’s for you.”

“So nice. Tank you Tony.” She reached out for him to take her and her arms wrapped around his neck. “Lobe Tony.”

“Well I love you right back kiddo. Now how about we go have fun.”

“Habe fun.” Lottie claps in excitement and she’s whisked away by Tony, the rest of the team following close behind. Even Henry left you and Bucky behind as he ran alongside Steve.

Bucky takes your hand and you both take your time walking towards the festivities. As soon as you do though a water balloon hits Bucky straight in the chest followed by Henry’s giggles.

“Go get ‘em babe.” You say and let go of his hand. Bucky walks away slowly, it should be more intimidating but Henry just laughs before disappearing.

“Oh it’s so on.”

You look around to find Tony still had Lottie with him so you turn and find Wanda and Nat sitting back and tanning. They waved you over so you take the seat beside Wanda and the three of you just start catching up on everything you’ve missed the last three weeks.

****

You’re currently finishing up some ice cream with Bucky and the kids, sitting at one of the picnic tables in the shade when a security guard finds you. He’s polite and apologetic when he stops by the table.

“Ma’am I’m sorry to bother you but you’re needed at the entrance.” He smiles at you.

“Is something wrong?”

“No, your father is here and he asked if you could meet him there first.”

“Oh, thank you. Make sure you get some ice cream before you head back, it’s hot out.”

“I’m on duty ma’am but thank you.”

“If someone says something you send them my way.” You smile at him before turning to Bucky. “I’ll be right back.”

You head out towards the makeshift parking lot excited to see your dad after almost two months. This was all that was missing for the day to be perfect and you knew Lottie would be excited to see her grandpa. The smile you had on your face vanishes as you lay your eyes on your father. Standing beside him is your mother and your three siblings. You notice by his body language alone that your dad is pissed as he argues with you mother.

“Dad, is everything ok?” You ask once you stop in front of them. They all turn to face you.

“Hey Kitten.” He walks closer and pulls you into a hug. “I’m so sorry about this. I had no idea they were coming.”

“It’s ok.”

“Y/N, you can’t say hello to the rest of your family.”

“Hello mother. Hello everyone else.”

Beside your mother there was your older brother with his wife and daughter who was just a year older than Charlotte and your younger siblings. They were fraternal twins, one boy and one girl.

“What are you all doing here?”

Your mother scoffs. “You’ve never even invited us to your home and that is how you’re going to greet us?”

“Well no one other than dad has ever cared about me so why should I invite you here?”

“You are so dramatic Y/N. Our lives don’t revolve around you.”

“Loraine, don’t start.” Your father warned.

“Look, it’s my daughter’s birthday and if this is how you’re going to behave then you can leave right now because I won’t let you ruin this for her.”

“We just got the invitation, if you want us to go we will.” Luke, your older brother offered. You looked at him and then at his daughter who seemed excited to be there.

“Gwandpa!”

Lottie’s excited squeal came from the entrance to the festivities. As you turned you saw a yellow dot running full force towards you. Just behind her was Bucky and Henry. Your dad takes one knee and opens his arms to embrace Lottie. He’s almost knocked back with the force she slams into him and she giggles.

“There’s my princess. Happy birthday Charlotte.” Your dad pulled back to take a good look at her. “You’ve grown up so much and look at your hair.” He pulled lightly at one of the pigtails causing Lottie to giggle.

“Am big gwandpa. Am dis many.”

She holds up four little fingers to show him how old she is.

“That is a big girl, do big girls like presents.”

“Lobe pwesents.” She giggles again just as Bucky stopped beside you.

“Help an old man up Buck.”

“Sure thing Ed.” Bucky gives him a hand and pulls him up. Your dad excuses himself quickly to go back to his car.

“This is Bucky my boyfriend, Bucky this is my family. This is my mother Lorraine, my older brother Luke, his wife Molly and their daughter Olivia. And these are the twins Josh and Sofia.” You announce before looking down at the kids. “And these are our kids Henry and Charlotte.”

Your dad gets back just as you’re done with the introductions. There’s a bit of an awkward silence before your mother breaks it.

“They look nothing like you.”

You take a deep breath before answering. “If you plan on doing anything to ruin this party I will personally kick you out and smile while doing it. I don’t even know why you’re here but for the sake of my children I’m not going to cause a scene.”

You feel a little pat on your thigh and you look down at Charlotte.

“Yes sweet Angel?”

“Mama can pay wit new fwiend?” She asks as she points at your niece Olivia.

“You have to ask her parents first.”

Lottie turns around and looks up at your brother.

“Can pay wit new fwiend?”

“What do you say Olivia? Do you want to go play with Charlotte and Henry?” Your brother asks his very shy daughter. She only nods as she looks up at her dad. In turn he looks at you and you smile at him. “Ok you kids can go play.”

Lottie holds out her hand and Olivia takes it. Then she holds out her hand for Henry and they’re off running back to all the fun.

“I'll keep an eye on them.” Molly offers. “It’s good to see you again Y/N.” She says with a smile as she walks past you.

“Good to see you too.”

“I’ll go with her. I know how Lottie can be.” Your dad winks at you.

After they’ve gone you’re left with your mother and siblings. Bucky standing next to you with his hand on the small of your back.

“So, are we going to have any issues?”

“Nope.” The twins say in unison.

“No, I’d like Olivia to get to know her aunt, uncle and cousins.”

You smiled at your brother’s words and his subtle acceptance of Bucky even though your relationship barely existed. Everyone looks at your mother and even though she has sunglasses you know she’s rolling her eyes.

“Fine.”

“Good. Come on, I'll show you guys around.” You said it more to your siblings but your mother trailed behind.

Luke was quick to find Molly and your dad close to where the kids were playing. As soon as you’re in their sights Lottie comes up with Olivia by her side. It seems like they took to each other like ducks to water and you could at least be grateful for that. Olivia looks up at you, she looks very much like your brother when he was younger. She seems hesitant to say something but you crouch down at her level.

“Are you having fun?”

She nods.

“Did you want something? Maybe some juice or ice cream?”

She shakes her head and you smile softly at her. Olivia leans in and you mirror her.

“Do you know black widow?” She whispers with her hands cupping her mouth.

“I do, would you like to meet her?”

Olivia’s eyes go wide before she nods. You turn toward your brother silently asking for permission.

“I’ll go with you.” He says as he gets up from the table.

You look at Bucky who just nods in your direction.

“Come on Lottie, let’s find Nat.”

Lottie takes Olivia’s hand while you walk side by side with your brother. You find Nat not too far from where you were. Some agent was trying to chat her up. She looked bored at most so when she saw you she was quick to end the conversation.

“There you are, I was wondering where you went. And who’s this?” She eyed your brother and then your niece.

“This is my brother Luke and my niece, Olivia, she really wanted to meet you.”

“Hello.” Nat said as she crouched down to be at the girl’s eye level.

“Nat, habe new fwiend. Is olibia.”

“It’s nice to meet you Olivia, my name is Nat. Are you having fun?”

Olivia nods her head as she slightly hides behind Lottie. You shoot Nat a grateful smile as she continues to make conversation with the girls.

“She seems like a great kid.” Luke tells you.

“She is, she’s the extrovert out of the two of them. I think Henry will get there eventually.”

“You seem happy.”

“Extremely happy.”

“I probably don’t have the right to ask or anything but… does he treat you right? I mean I know about his past and I’m not judging him or anything but I just want to know that you’re ok.”

Luke had always tried his best to keep you safe when he could but he was also a child. Eventually he did as he was told, mostly staying away from you. If he didn’t he’d get in trouble too.

“He does, Bucky is a wonderful man and father. He’d do anything for us.”

“That’s good. I’m glad you found someone, you deserve to be happy.”

“Thank you. I’d like to maybe set up a day so the girls can play. Maybe a weekend so that you can stay over or even have the kids do a sleepover.”

“Yeah, we can manage that.”

You smile up at your brother before turning back to the girls and offering to play some games with them.

****

Steve runs up to you with a smile on his face. It was nice to see him back to his old self. His eyes drift from you to Luke.

“Hey magnet,” he gave you a cheeky smile. “Where’d you go?”

“I was meeting my family at the parking lot. Steve this is my older brother Luke, Luke this is Steve.”

“Wow, it is such an honor to meet you.” Your brother sticks his hand out excitedly. But you could see Steve’s expression change slightly.

“I thought I’d never get to meet the rest of Y/N’s family.”

“Steebie look, habe new fwiend.” Lottie comes up to the three of you. “Is olibia.”

“This is my niece.”

“Hello darling, are you having fun?” Steve asks as he crouches down. Lottie immediately getting closer to Steve could wrap his arms around her. She rests her back into his chest. Olivia nods shyly at him before she gives him a smile. “Well that’s good. Lottie, have you seen your brother?”

“Bubba wit gwandpa.” She points towards the picnic tables.

“Eddie’s here?”

“Yup.” You say. “I’ll walk back with you so I can introduce you to everyone else.”

Once you’re at the table again you introduce Steve to the rest of your family, your sister in law and younger siblings gawk at shirtless Steve. Always a gentleman Steve shakes hands but you can see his jaw clench when he reaches your mother. He’d seen you cry enough times over this family to know she was the main cause of it.

“Henry, did you want to do that water balloon fight now? We can sneak up on Sam and Clint.”

“Yeah!” Henry shot up out of his seat.

“I’ll bring him back in a bit.”

“Hey doll, wanna go play with the goats?” Bucky had turned to Lottie.

“Can pay wit olibia an goats?”

Your mother scoffs. “Should you really be allowing Olivia around her for so long? I mean we don’t know the child. She could be a bad influence.”

You could hear the metal plates of Bucky’s arm adjusting as he clenched his fist. Immediately you put your hand on his forearm and squeeze. A silent request to let you handle it.

“They’ve been playing just fine.

“Really mom?”

“Why would you say that?”

Your dad, Luke and Molly speak up. Lottie doesn’t understand what’s going on so she just looks up at your brother with hopeful eyes

“I’ll go with ya Buck.” Your dad offers. “Come on girls, let's go see the goats.” The girls happily start walking away from the table still holding hands.

Bucky silently gets up from the table and walks away stepping in line with your father.

“What is wrong with you?”

“What? I know we’re all thinking about it.” Your mother shrugs her shoulders.

“Ma,” Henry reappeared across from you on the table, startling everyone else. His smile was brilliant and his eyes were bright and you can’t help but smile back at him. “I got uncle Clint in the face with a water balloon, twice.”

“You should see how many more times you can get him before he gets you.”

“Ok.” He says happily before running and then literally disappearing into the crowd.

“He turns invisible?” Josh asks.

“Yup.”

“That’s Awesome.”

“What about his sister?” This time it’s Sofia asked.

“She can see the future.”

“Oh great two more freaks.” Your mother mutters but it was loud enough for you to hear.

It was enough to make your blood boil. To your surprise your siblings and Molly came to the kids' defense. But you stood up and grabbed your mother by her arm and pulled her in the direction of the building. This conversation was a long time coming and you weren’t going to do it in public.

You made it to the closest conference room available, shutting the door behind your mother and your siblings. It took you a moment to compose yourself because of years of mistreatment and full on neglect on your mother’s part.

“Don’t you ever talk about them like that ever again.”

“Why are you always overreacting?”

“I am not overreacting, you are just cruel. You always have been, you’ve always treated me differently than them.” You motioned toward your brothers and sister. “I had no choice but to accept it but I won’t allow you to disrespect my family.”

“Your family?” Your mother scoffs. “One freak raising two more. That man is just playing house with you. Do you think he really wouldn’t be out there looking for someone better? I mean I know he’s a murderer and everything but still, he could do so much better than you.”

“Mom!” Luke yelled. “That’s enough.”

“What Luke? Don’t tell me you aren’t thinking the same thing. He’s playing house with a freak just so that she can raise his two kids. It’s pathetic even for you.”

“That’s enough! I didn’t ask for any of this.

What did I ever do to you?”

“You were born!” She yells. “From the first moment you started showing signs you were weird, absolutely everything revolved around you. It was exhausting. We had to change everything about our lives to accommodate you and somehow you still managed to hurt us.”

“I didn’t ask to be born with my abilities but you chose to treat me the way you did. I’m sick of your attitude and the way you made sure none of my siblings ever wanted to be around me. You treated me like the black sheep of the family for something I had no control over. And on top of that you were always so abusive.”

“Abusive?” Eddie asked behind you. You whipped around to find your dad accompanied by Bucky and Molly. You assumed the latter had gone to find them. “What abuse?”

“It’s nothing dad.”

“Bullshit.” Luke spoke up and the twins nodded in agreement. “If you don’t say anything I will.”

“There is nothing to say, she’s being dramatic like always.”

“She’s not, dad.” Sofia spoke up. “It only happened whenever you were gone.”

“Mom was horrible to Y/N. She would tell us that Y/N was going to kill us because she couldn’t control herself. Mom would keep her locked up in the basement for hours.” Josh looked in your direction. “We’re sorry for everything, we know better now.”

Bucky moved towards you, he pulled you in and wiped away the tears you had started shedding. This was too much, the heartbreak on your father’s face was making the room feel too small.

“Why did no one else say anything? Why didn’t you?” Your father looked from your siblings to you.

“I was a scared kid.”

“Kitten…” you could see the guilt in his eyes before he turned to your mother. “Everyone get out.”

“Dad

“I said out.” His tone is not leaving space to argue.

The moment the door is closed you can hear him yelling at your mother. Bucky pulled you away from the shouting and into his chest. You sobbed into his chest as he comforted you.

“Don’t.” He whispered before you heard your brother behind you.

“She’s my sister.”

“Yeah? Then where were you when she needed you? Once you grew up you were free to make your own choices and you chose to keep quiet. You left her alone and made her think she wasn’t loved.”

“I’m gonna go find the kids.” You pulled away from Bucky and gave him a sad smile.

“Y/N, can we talk, please?”

“I don’t really want to talk right now.” You say over your shoulder.

Before you take a step the door to the conference room opens and your mother looks furious. It was the same look that she would use to terrorize you. It was full of anger, disgust and hate, but those were her true feelings towards you. She walked toward you with purpose. You froze on the spot, breath caught in your lungs as the same fear crept up on you. At that moment you weren’t highly trained in hand to hand combat or an avenger. You hadn’t been through multiple near death experiences. No, in that moment you were a little girl

Bucky was one step ahead and as your mother lifted her hand to slap you, just as she had done some many times before, he stopped her. The look on her face mirrored the horror in yours as she looked at the black and gold pattern of Bucky’s arm.

“Let go of me, you murderer.” She raged.

Bucky turned her so that she would face him and took a step toward her. With every step he took she would move back one until she hit a wall. His left hand rested against the wall near her head, his eyes were dark and face held a murderous expression.

“You don’t get to hurt her anymore.” Bucky said through gritted teeth. Although he was channeling the winter soldier more than anything.

“You touch me, I'll make sure you go to jail.”

“And you think I wouldn’t smile in my mug shot? You leave right now and you never come back. And she isn’t a freak or weird, she’s a great woman,an amazing friend and an incredible mother. You don’t deserve to be breathing the same air as her. Get out.” Bucky said before stepping back. Everyone in the hallway hadn’t dared to move as they watched him.

“Luke, Sofia, Josh let’s go.”

You shut down at that point. It’s what always happens. They did as they were told, they didn’t think about how much it hurt you that they never really stood up for you or protected you. Your mother started walking toward the door confidently thinking your siblings were following her. She turned around and glared at them.

“I said let’s go.”

“No mom.” Sofia shook her head. “We want to stay.”

“Josh. Let’s go.”

Josh shakes his head and steps closer to Sofia.

“Luke?”

“Mom, we're done doing what you tell us.”

“Do you see what you’ve done? You’ve broken this family.” Your mom tells you.

“Lorraine you’ve done enough. Leave.”

“Fine but I don’t want any of you to look for me once you realize the mistake you’ve made by choosing this freak and her so-called family.”

She glared at you one last time and walked out. You can see a security guard just outside escorting away from the building and the party. Once the door closed you felt like you could breathe again. You looked at your siblings and then at your dad who took a step closer to you but you held your hand up.

“I need a minute.” You whispered and then walked away.

****

You gave yourself thirty minutes. Just half an hour to cry before pulling yourself together to celebrate your sweet angel’s birthday the right way. You washed your face and headed outside.

The afternoon went by a whole lot better. The team was aware that something had happened but they didn’t pry and you were thankful for that. Your family tried to talk about it but you shut them down immediately, the day wasn’t about you. You decided to focus on Charlotte and Henry and do anything and everything you could to see those beaming smiles on their faces.

As the sun was setting Tony gathered everyone around the dance floor and brought the team and your family to the front. He presented Lottie with another cake and everyone that was there sang happy birthday. She giggled just like she did the first time.

Once the sun finally set and most of the guests were gone you asked your family to stay. Bucky was kind enough to set them up in the apartment he once occupied. While he did that you made sure the kids showered and then you did as well. Charlotte had asked if she could have a sleepover with Olivia and neither you or your brother could say no.

As you finish tucking the girls in you can hear whispered voices coming from Henry’s room. You get closer to the door to hear Henry and your dad talking.

*****

“So you’re mama’s dad?” Henry asks.

“Yup, and that makes me your grandpa.”

“What do grandpas do?”

“Oh well we can do all sorts of things. We have fun together, give you candy and extra dessert even if your parents say no. Especially if your parents say no. We can go fishing together. As a matter of fact I’m gonna take you and your dad on a fishing trip real soon.” Eddie explains.

“Would you love me? Even if I’m a freak?”

“Why would you think you’re a freak?”

“I heard that lady say it. She told mom she was a freak and that she was raising two more freaks. I know mama was sad about it but she didn’t want to show it. Who was that lady?”

“Did you disappear and follow them in?” Henry nodded and Eddie sighed. He looked at Henry before pulling him out of bed and sitting him in his lap.

“That was your mom’s mom.”

“But she’s so mean. Mama isn’t mean, mama is good. She always takes care of us and gives us hugs and kisses when we’re sad. Why can’t her mama do that?”

“I wish I knew Henry. Your mama is so good and she has so much love to give. I think that’s why she’s such a good mama. And she deserves to have people that love her just as much. But to answer your other question, yes, I do love you and I don’t think you’re a freak. You and your sister are special like your mom and while there will be people that won’t accept you, you’ll always have your family that will love and support you.”

Henry just nods while looking up at his grandfather.

“Now do you want me to read you a book before lights out?”

“Yes please.”

“Alright kiddo get into bed while I get a book.”

****

You turn away just as Bucky walks back into the hallway. He quietly follows you into your bedroom and watches you walk around finishing your nighttime routine. Bucky settles down in bed and the moment you join him he pulls you into his lap. He lets you cry for as long as you want while he holds on tightly.

“I’ve got you, sugar. Just let it out.”

“Today was a lot. I didn’t expect to see them here. I almost ruined everything.”

“Oh baby no you didn’t.” Bucky put a hand under your chin so that he could make you look at him. “You handled that very well, even when she was insulting our kids. I’m so sorry you had to deal with that as a kid.”

“Is it sad that it wasn’t even as bad as what I got?”

“Just a little, but you don’t have to worry about her anymore. You have me and the kids, the team. And your family is here.”

“They stayed.” You whispered.

“They chose you this time. And that should count for something.”

“It does but I don’t know where to go from here.”

“It’s not your job to fix it, it’s theirs. But we’ll figure it out tomorrow.” Bucky moved you two around until you were both lying back all cuddled up.

“Thank you for being there for me today.”

“You don’t have to thank me, protecting you and the kids is my job. I’ll go up against anyone that tries to hurt you. It doesn’t matter if it’s your mom or hydra, I won’t stop until you’re safe.”

You knew he was right. Still you voiced your thanks again. The next day would bring on new emotions and old wounds would be open but hopefully you would be going in the right direction. A chance to finally have a relationship with your own siblings and give the kids more people to love them.

Ch 21

Permanent taglist:

@rebekahdawkins

@cjand10

@nalny5

@Sturchling

@angywritesstuff

@seitmai

@writing-for-marvel

@goldylions

@darkhairedmenrule

@almosttoopizza

@littleseasiren

@pono-pura-vida

@talesofadragon

@midnightramyeoncravings

@bunnygirlwriter876

Series taglis:

@buckystevelove

@vicmc624

@just-someone11

@sjsmith56

@emily-roberts

@spencerriedisagorgman

@superduckmilkshake

@samfreakingwinchester

@lofaewrites

@enchantedbarnes

@callsign-athena

@broadwaybabe18

@saranghaey

@viperchick47

@ilovetaquitosmmmm

@da-pimp-river-niall

@ozwriterchick

@jenn-f

@rebel-soldat

@therealwritersblog

@alyroseking

@samlworld

@capswife

#my little love series #Bucky Barnes x reader #bucky barnes series #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #girl dad!bucky barnes x reader #boy dad!bucky Barnes x reader #charlotte barnes #henry barnes

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blueywrites · 1 year

Note

What version of eddie are we getting in the new fic? Secure, insecure, confident, loud, quiet?

Ahhhh, I love that you asked this question! It inspired me to whip this up for you. Not sure if this is exactly how it'll appear in the final draft, but here's a little sneak peek at the first time you see Eddie in New Skin. Oh, and, let me preface this by saying... appearances can be deceiving. 😉

In the short time you’ve been working at the diner, you’d grown used to the sight of broad-shouldered Harry and the repetitive sound of his thick bull hands scraping the spatula slow and even as he works the cooktop. So the sight that greets you now as you shuffle into the kitchen after Sherry is quite jarring.

Before the cooktop stands a man who is both shorter and thinner than Harry but somehow far more imposing. He’s angular and jagged, frenetic in his movements: booted foot tapping tile, elbow jutting sharp as he jerks the spatula, a wild mess of curls shaking as his head bobs exaggeratedly. And the sound of the kitchen isn’t at all soothing in his presence. There’s some kind of tinny howling coming from him, some unholy noise that nearly makes you halt at the threshold of the swinging doors before you realize it’s coming from underneath his hair and not from him, exactly. You quickly spot the thin cord running down to the tape player clipped to his tight dark pants, though the handkerchief swaying at his hip— old and spilling loose threads, black and white and emblemed with eerie skulls— has your nerves kicking up again just as quickly.

Sherry’s voice is hoarse from smoke and age but, to your surprise, not filled with even a hint of the same nerves as she greets the man. “Afternoon, Ed,” she says, sounding almost fond as she shouts to be heard above the music.

Almost instantly, the headphones are jerked down to hang around his neck, and when the man spins abruptly from the cooktop to face you both, your chest clenches again. Yet his voice is brash and warm, mouth split wide to flash his eyeteeth as his gaze finds your coworker quickly. “Afternoon, Sher,” he says, mimicking her fond inflection, a teasing grin dimpling the corner of his plush pink lips. “How’s my best girl?”

Your eyes quickly dart from him and Sherry and then back, face frozen so as not to reveal your reaction: a mixture of wariness and confusion since he looks almost thirty years younger than her. Sherry just rolls her eyes and purses her lips, crackled with deep pink lipstick. “Yeah, yeah. We’re all your best girl, aren’t we, Eddie?” It’s said with long-suffering sarcasm like this exchange is akin to slipping on an old pair of shoes— worn in and comfortably molded to one’s foot.

The man, Eddie, doesn’t reply, though his smile does widen. Sherry nods your way but addresses him. “This is the new girl. Be nice,” she warns, wagging a gnarled finger.

“Whaddya mean, Sher? I’m always nice.” Eddie huffs through his nose, showily stretching his arms above his head and holding his clothed elbows as his eyes slide to you. Yours dip to the dark stains beneath his pits, the evidence of his toil and sweat that begs the question of why he’d be wearing long sleeves if he’s that hot. “Hello, new girl,” he says lightly, and his voice hums like there’s a secret joke he’s holding back from laughing at.

The cock of his hip, the sharpness of his limbs, the narrowness of his waist where the apron is tied hastily, the stretch of his ribcage against the dirty long-sleeved shirt, the tilt of his lips— it hits you suddenly what he is, just as suddenly as you’d realized that Sherry and the girls are bleating goats and Harry is a gentle bull.

This man is a coyote.

#blueynews #new skin #linecook!eddie #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson

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hoodharlow · 10 months

Text

The Humptons

AN: just bc

Requested? no

Warnings: no just jackman being silly

Word Count: n/a

•••

Miriam via Instagram Stories

•••

@'mdm: giving him duality

@'jackharlow: thought you were giving me head

-> @'mdm:

@'katdominguez: I still can't believe your ass showed up in a coat 😭 girl we're in July

->@'mdm: and yet your ass took it because you got cold

@'saintclauds: 🤤🥰

@'miriamstan: can Jack fight 🥴

@'winnieharlow: the most gorgeous girl

@'fanguy: she's too fine

@'mackupdates: two years ago they had us scrambling for clues about them spending the 4th together and now they're going to parties and allowing themselves to be seen together 😌 that's growth 🤌🏻

View all 39,482 comments

•••

@'jackharlow: we found our GOAT vaccination spot

@'mdm: two pretty best friends styled by me 😇

@'lilnasx: that should be me🎙

@'dbook: the finest out there

@'jackfan: that joke still makes me laugh lol

@'mdmxjh: why is Druski kinda 😏

@'claybornharlow: couldn't make out your arm with Dru's shirt

-> @'mdm: look for his watch, it's like Where is Waldo 🤭

-> @'urbanwyatt: took me a second but I found it

-> @'jackharlow: y'all are annoying

View all 32,994 comments

•••

@'mdm: The Humptons

@'jackharlow: how about you hump me a ton

-> @'mdm: you're not as funny as you think you are (but yes I will)

@'dualipa: you look so good in my set 😍

->@'mdm: your whole collection has me obsessed

@'mackshipper: Jack and Miriam are always dressed like they're going to two different places and I love them for that

@'zendaya: 😍

@'cornymanbaby: if this whore was my girl, I wouldn’t let this shit slide. I would have put her bitch ass in her place if she pulled this shit on me. Why the fuck does she think it's okay to disrespect Jack Harlow like this? She's so fucking thirsty for likes and clout. Jack is who made this bitch famous.

-> @'mdmxjh: I just checked your page and it screams loser. You're 40 posting videos of yourself trying to rap but you can't even keep up to the simple beat

@'miriamstan: not you saying that Jack Harlow made THE Miriam Dominguez famous as if she's not a nepo baby who's made a name for herself. She's literally one award from an EGOT. Worry about yourself and your shitty career

-> @'jackharlow: I've seen way too many fucking comments like this. I don't own my partner. She's her own fucking person and can do whatever she pleases. She looks good in anything so who am I too dictate what she wears. What I won't let slide is men like you think you can slut shame my girl just because she decided to post a few pictures. If it bothers so damn much, gtfo (pinned)

-> @'mackaremyparents: Keke Palmer's employee should take notes

View all 25,864 comments

Taglist: @heavyhitterheaux @cherry4everrr @carma-fanficaddict @youngharleezy @youngharleezyxo @babyharleezy @that-90s-girllll @alinaharlow @harlowcomehome @nattinatalia @webinurcloset @gassyandsassy1 @jackharloww @awhore4moree @noescapricho-essentimiento @a-moment-captured @neon-lights-and-glitter @purecinnamonextract @whywontyoulovemecami @camificrecs

#jack and miriam #jack harlow #jack harlow insta au #jack harlow instagram au #jack harlow smau #jack harlow smut #jack harlow fluff

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petewentzisblack1312 · 5 months

Note

I was gonna ask you this anyway actually bc you know a lot of artists but I just kept forgetting bc adhd is kicking my ass rn but since you wanted asks: do you know of any cool online stores or artists selling stickers? im trying to decorate my new laptop and I bought a few on etsy but I wanna get more

made in a lab to answer this question bc all i do is look for artists that skew cool. i will also give artists that skew cute. some artists are in between these categories, that is, they have a cute artstyle with subject matter that at least at times skews cool. my metric for whats cool and whats cute is pretty much 'based on aesthetics if this were being sold at a basement show in the 90s to 00s would someone get called gay'. if the answer is yes, its cute. if the answer is no, its cool. i dont know if this makes sense but im gonna use this categorizing anyway. i will tag the artists who are on tumblr but otherwise im naming everyone by their instagram handle because thats where i look at art and im on my phone and cant link everyone without losing my sanity

coming back after writing this list i have GOT to put this under a cut

@cursedluver: cute/cool, mostly cool to me, very bright and colourful and his starpions are really fun

ummmheather: cute/cool, mostly cute but shes got some stuff thats silly in a more cool way if that makes sense.

strikegentlyco: cool, they only recently started making stickers so the selection is a bit limited but they do have lots of enamel pins

sheselle: i would say firmly on the cute side of things in aesthetics but i think her sense of humor can be interesting. new to me though. i think you will really love some of her stuff and not really be into others.

@sweatermuppet: cool, lots of queer political stuff

luluvanhoagland: cool but with a soft artstyle so it feels cute.

@sofftpunk: cute/cool, lots of lgbt stuff

thegraveyardrave: mostly cool, they do have a tumblr blog but its specifically for clownposting so i will not tag him

leestrawberrryshop: cute with a cool tilt, mostly white and pink with just lineart but its an interesting scribble/doodle style. memey at times

prettybadco: cool but lately this guys been doing so much i think you should leave fan merch and its not bad but i dont watch i think you should leave and its not what i followed for. the original stuff is pretty neat though

catcoven: medieval. giving this one its own category on the grounds that thats pretty self explanatory and more precise than cool/cute

interrupted by finding a bee in my bedroom while drinking slightly warm tea (house is closed and the windows in my room (also closed) have mosquito nets)

@verdant-succubus: cool but there is body horror and guts and stuff so tread lightly if youre sensitive to that sort of thing.

radhia rahman (knivesmeow): cute but i feel cool when i look at her art

abprallenuk: cool but the colour palletes are strictly pastel

svv.art: very cool

smdefelice: cool. mostly does screenprinting but i am pretty sure they do stickers also. however the shop is currently closed for con prep do i cannot confirm

lilboatboutique: cute/cool has a homesick at space camp sticker which is currently on my water bottle and which i own in 2 variants as an enamel pin.

kerin cunningham: cool. emo. the goat. what else is there to say.

@darbydraws: cool. quite like her stickers although her bread and butter is t shirts. also emo

xraeart: cool. alt streetwear brand so. yknow.

skullingway: cool. theyre one of my favourite artists hands down. not a lot of stickers tho

jordandebney: cool. this guy makes the coolest stickers but most of it is for his subscription box which is fine. theres 2 stickers not behind a paywall

elrosabel: cool stuff, cute style. she kinda like. soft closed. to do polymer clay sculptures. but she might have reopened? i know shes selling stuff under this project again

piratesarrrt: cool but in a soft style. similar subject matter to luluvanhoagland. which is to say weird girl heads.

seankeetonart: cool.

@moonlume: cute. the concepts are cool though

jimibiscuits: cool. this is one of my favourite artists i have. so many of his pins. he doesnt have a ton of stickers though iirc

@8pxl: i am going to invent a category called 'pretty'. i love pixel art and this is my favourite pixel artist ever.

i gotta fuckin stop

go forth and get some stickers

#dils declares

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zappedbyzabka · 2 months

Note

talking about monsters, werewolf kreese....

Absolutely. GENIUS ideas. Big fuckin brain.

I’ve always loved werewolf Kreese because he’s the one that trained Red Riding Hood (Johnny) and all the little piggies.

Hairy chest and arms🥰

Papa wolf wearing granny’s apron

Are we talking about the kind of werewolf that just looks like a really big wolf after turning or are we talking about this? Because it changes things.

He’d never have a varsity jacket, that was a thing for the guys Betsy dated before him. He preferred something fit for meeting any broad’s dad in. Slacks with a clean, well-ironed shirt and shiny shoes will always do the trick in first impressions with nearly anyone. And when he still had his uniform, there were plenty of busty khaki wackies to keep him company.

But as he grew older, he started dressing like someone you could just guess would turn into a werewolf. Something like a lumberjack with concerningly pointy canines.

His sergeant could have turned him (if he wasn’t born a werewolf), and maybe that had a hand in his decision to let him fall into the pit of snakes.

Terry always knew his secret. Kreese was a bit vulnerable after everything. His girl’s death, the trauma of war, and being turned into a fucking werewolf—he had to tell someone and he knew Twig was too devoted to blabber.

He bought a whole field in the middle of nowhere with a load of sheep and goats for him to rip through on full moons, and John would wake up naked in their carnage. It wasn’t what he’d have liked to do with his free time, but he became absolutely ravenous and possessed, unable to stop himself.

Terry would be there by helicopter the next morning with towels and food a normal human would eat, his hair coated in pomade.

It was a jarring difference, being next to his elegant friend wearing pristine clothes when he’s bare and covered in blood, still has death stuck in his throat and the cracks of his teeth when Terry’s are white as the coke he snorts off his pinky after asking him what it felt like. Too excited to hear the gruesome details, but it was only Kreese’s second time turning and he didn’t remember anything but noise.

“It felt like eating something alive.” is what he decided to say.

“Sounds fun, I’m envious.”

He grew sick of being powerless and started doing the bullshit meditation that Terry was always trying to get to get him to do, fluffing up the act like a pillow, saying how it helps you ‘gain control’.

(”It’s the next thing to nirvana if you take just a pinch of peyote beforehand. Oh, captain, I was sitting on my floor straight-backed for five hours with zero boredom—”

“Just show me how to do this damn thing! It’s infuriating enough that I have to do this.”

Terry narrowed his eyes at him, hands on his hips. “Seon demands the admission of ignorance. Remember that, John. ”

He grabbed two cushions in placed them on the floor across from each other, sitting cross-legged on one “Now, shall we?”)

He didn’t fog up his mind with drugs, but he wrote down everything Twig taught him, calmed his mind, and accepted the fact that he didn’t know how to control the beast yet. He meditated every night, focused on every feeling, and explored every nook and cranny in his brain—though, a lot of things were figuratively covered up in tarps.

He found that one day, he had the steering wheel. His unwanted shifts were less frequent and he learns to change on command.

He’s never clear-headed as a furry monster, but he’s still aware enough in it. It’s no longer like taking a backseat in his body and watching himself do things.

(There is a possibility he could still lose control....COUGH)

I know he’d purposely shift and fuck around with teenagers trying to play hooky/canoodling in the woods by chasing them to their cars. Make everyone think they have a wolf problem in LA.

Probably would do it to the Cobras and see how they’d react in the face of danger. (real nice, Kreese.)

Does he tear people he hates limb from limb sometimes? Who knows. He definitely ponders it.

Or yknow, maybe he was just born as one and this universe has all sorts of creatures, ûwhich is an au I ADORE. Maybe he was always comfortable as a shifter and has total power over it. He’s a weapon in two forms, deadlier than a Cobra: that doesn’t sound like a problem to him.

He has always had that carpet on his chest and a viciousness inside so.

(And let me not get into him having ruts and turning pussy whipped—which includes ass. Just getting absolutely parched for it and humping against furniture, making guttural sounds like an animal and fucking his hand like he’s trying to give himself friction burn. Poor guy has no good place to pop a knot—or does he ?)

#Sorry this took so long to answer...I just go ‘do I wanna write more or?....’ but short answers gotta happen sometimes #But I love werewolf kreese😮‍💨#If you want me to go more into the nsft stuff them lmk #Or also kreerence stuff👀#john kreese

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werebutch · 22 days

Note

Haiii teddy ^__^ how is it going =3 !!! I watched the solar eclipse here is my picsss

Ok kind of buttcheeks but u get the idea. We're gonna be moving soon (again) but the house will probably be in me and my best friends names :D because legal stuff and credit...heh. but still a house with my name on it sounds really nice. And pets!! Nobody telling us what we can and can't do. Hopefully it works out that way.

How are the big things in yr life going ^_^ I hope it is well....!!! I also love the bear shirt when I was snooping I think it's su cute LOL

Bex this is like the best news ever making me smile behind my screen right now. ILYSM u deserve this and so much more. So happy for you thats awesome and i hope everything works out like it should.. <3333

i just got back from watching the eclipse at my school! I didnt get any pictures but it was a huge gathering with food and music and stuff it was very nice. Kids and dogs running around too very cute. Afterwards my sisters friend who knows practically everyone in the entire world introduced us to two brony girls (pegasisters..LMFAOOO) and got their insta and talked for a while. So im very happy with that cause they’re really nice. And even if its just for today im so glad i got to talk to a bunch of people 😸 then a bunch of us went to get smoothies..! Today is making me feel like a real person again i wont lie. LMFAOOO <3

Not too many big things going on.. Lately my life has been pretty boring i wont lie im just very exhausted a lot of the time. Now that its a little warmer and sunny these days though im more motivated to go outside to my usual spots and engage in my outside hobbies. I still feel very anxious lately about genuinely every little thing but im getting there and i know it’ll pass ^__^ on Saturday we went to a (new!!!) huge antique store (need to take u there…very fun stuff..) and i spent a lot of money.. i figured i usually buy nothing anywhere so id treat myself. MY BEAR SHIRT.. ill post my haul when i get home.. IT WAS A LOT OF FUN!!!! After we went to an Indian buffet it was very good i tried goat for the first time. ^__^ and they had mango ice cream… ummy..<3

I’m so excited for the concert.. i have to do my homework though i dont know too many hail the sun songs.. im in a mood right now im just like…ahhhh……^__^ you mentioned pets.. if you could get a pet right now what would it be ?! I’m curious

#asks #wolfblod #YIPPEE #im sitting outside in my moms swing chair thing and the red winged blackbirds are very loud i love when they’re loud. obnoxious little guys.#i like to yap apparently sowwie HAHAHAH

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kafkaguy · 24 days

Note

ethan. i chose whatever music asks you haven’t done yet.

hi kieren im kind of obsessed with u. there are a lot that i havent done but some of them i cant be bothered to answer/genuinely cannot answer or the answer is just no so here's the ones i like <3

Do you listen to more oldies or more current stuff? A mix of both but leaning more to oldies, the majority of my favourite songs and artists are either from the 60s & 70s era, or the 90s & 00s era <3

Would you wear a t-shirt of a band you're not into? Probably not, even if the design is cool i only wear band tshirts if i care abt the band. But if someone gave me an artist tshirt as a gift, i’d wear it AND listen to the artist it depicts 👍

Is there an artist or song that you like, despite being of a genre you don't usually like? I like all genres i don't discriminate. i’m bisexual

A song or album from the 50s or earlier: this compilation album of old japanese pop 1950-1951… discovered through mash playlists

A song or album from the 60s: 1-800-are-you-experienced by jimi hendrix 1967 :)

A song or album from the 70s: Born to run by BRUCIE 1975 raaaagghhhhhh

A song or album from the 80s: King of rock by run-dmc 1985 💪💥

A song or album from the 90s Call the doctor by sleater-kinney 1996

A song or album from the 2000s: Cheap pop for the elite by kore. ydro., 2006

A song or album from the 2010s: TRANSANGELIC EXODUS BY EZRA FURMAN 2018. GOAT

Do you and your partner/best friend share a special song? One you’d call “our song”? unfortunately for my boyfriend and i it is the predatory wasp of the palisades is out to get us by sufjan stevens which is indicative of how normal we both are

Do you play any instruments? I’ve been “learning” the bass for about 2 years but havent made much progress but i can do basic riffs and improvise a little

Who’s your favorite fictional band or artist? Marceline The Vampire

When was the last time you cried when listening to a song, if ever? I couldn’t tell you the last time a song made me properly cry but i sort of cried listening to come on in yesterday because i was having a category 5 peter tork moment

Your favorite artist from your city/state/country? At the moment its marina spanou and based on her lyrics i think she is literally from the same area of athens as me <3

A song you like in a language you don’t speak:

A song you like with lyrics in two or more languages:

songs that are symbolic of a time when i was literally and without exaggeration in the trenches. korean & english

Do you enjoy musicals? If so, what’s your favorite? Top 5: fiddler on the roof, jesus christ superstar, newsies, les miserables, hadestown.

Have you watched any musician’s biopics? Do you have a favorite? I’M NOT THERE DIRECTED BY TODD HAYNES MY NUMBER 1 ☝️ even if i am not the biggest bob dylan girl out there i fucking love that movie so much

Do you listen to music when it's raining or do you stop to hear the sound of the rain? Im answerin this question cos i like it. If its raining really hard i take out my headphones and turn my music up so i can hear it out loud blended with the sound of the rain <3

Do you prefer live recordings or studio recordings? LIVE RECORDINGS ARE MY BEST FRIENDS. I dont know if i prefer them but theres something so comcorting and beautiful of hearing live stuff so yeah <3

Okay these were the questions i cared about. thank you i love you . heheheheh

#YAAYYYY MUSIC :)#kip 🕸️#📬

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ask-blue-team · 3 months

Note

(Last but not least, the head honcho, the main show, the big cheese, the big boss, the cream of the crop, the GOATed one and only, John-117’s Valentine’s invite)

:: John-117 opens the hatch and the hallway is far as far as the eye can see stunning ladies of approximately his age from all walks of life and of all different backgrounds. They’re each one holding a Valentines card, a rose or other gift. The girl in the very front is wearing a “I ❤️John-117” t-shirt and most of the rest are wearing some kind of Halo memorabilia ::

They all speak in unison:

“Never make a girl a promise if you know you can’t keep it.”

(Yup, it’s the fangirl horde)

:: John then wakes up with a startle and in a cold sweat. It was just a dream. He warily goes to check the hallway, nobody is there. However, there’s a single card and rose at the doorstep with a scent of perfume ::

The card reads:

“John,

“Ever since Admiral Osman made the Spartan-II’s records public, I just knew you were one of them.

“And I was right.

”Many years ago, you saved my life on Eridanus on lake Gusev. You then promised to protect and marry me. Then you were gone. Now you’re back. Baby steps, but the Valentines Ball is in two weeks and I need a date.

“You’re it. I’m asking. Please don’t make me order you.

“Written by my hand with love and affection that’s never faded across the years,

“Parisa

”P.S. Never make a girl a promise if you know you can’t keep it.”

Fred: Poor John. So surprised he got invited that it fried his brain.

Kelly: John? You okay?

John: Yeah...

Linda: Well, who was it?

John: An old... an old friend.

Fred: Are you gonna say yes?

John: Wouldn't miss it for the world.

#fred 104 #halo #john 117 #kelly 087 #linda 058 #master chief #ask blue team #blue team #ask blog

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d-dalladalla · 2 years

Note

you are the GOAT of answering requests seriously. but lemme ask, can we get ryujin teaching the other girls in itzy to please a girl by using the reader as a fuckdoll for all of their practise? all love

Sksksksksksk ty ty

She would be so down to do that

I feel like it would start by the other girls being aware of your relationship but due to their dating ban and being too scared to break it, they wouldn’t be as daring and go out with someone

They were curious though, about what to do whenever they started dating and they were too embarrassed to ask anyone else but Ryujin

Yuna would definitely be the one to bring it up, your all watching a movie and Ryujin has you sat on her lap as she scrolls through her phone and Yuna just blurts out how do you fuck a girl

And your girlfriend was more than happy to give a demonstration

The other girls’ faces were bright red and So was yours but they wanted to know and porn was unrealistic anyways

And she would waste no time in getting started, Laying you down on the couch and she unbuttons your Shirt, commenting to the girls to make sure to pull and tug and your nipples

Making sure to exaggerate her kisses down your stomach, making them so sloppy and leaving a wet trail

Then she would have your pants down, panties off and legs spread as the girls moved round to get a better look. She would tell them to make sure to hold the thighs apart so the girl can’t close them.

She would start to eat your cunt and leave sloppy kisses and licks up and down, every now and again breaking away to tell the girls to make sure to use their tongue

You had your arms flung over your head covering your eyes out of embarrassment

Whenever she dove back in and started to tease her fingers at your entrance, the noises that filled the silence were so obscene, only that and the heavy breathes from the girls as they watched

She started to pump and twist and curl her fingers in you, pressing a hand down on your lower stomach to keep you still.

She leant up to your ear to whisper about how such a good girl you are and how you’re such a good fuck doll

And it only made you whine and thrash you hips as you came.

She brought a hand up to her mouth to clean and then gestured to the girls and to you

“Who wants a go next?”

#itzy smut #ryujin x female reader #ryujin smut #d-dalladalla

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majestyeverlasting · 2 years

Note

drabble for “can you hold me?” “i feel safe here” ❤️❤️

Belonging

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Summary: Like a moth drawn to a flame, you pressed yourself even closer to his body, situating your arms around his neck yet again. This time, you rested your chin on his shoulder and closed your eyes. A little taste of forever.

There, under the moon with the man you loved, was right where you belonged.

Word Count: 2.6k

A/N: Part 4 of me not knowing how to write a drabble. This was so much fun to write, so you I hope you all enjoy.

Nightfall in Wakanda arrived with undeniable promise. You could feel it in the warmth of the breeze, and see it in the way stars shone as they watched from above. Even the moon, in all its mystery, had made itself known.

The village elders believed that all you had to do was look up to know that goodness was in store; whether the sky be blue, gray, or darkened by the absence of the sun. Because if something so breathtakingly vast could exist, surely the gods above would see it fit to orchestrate moments of splendor for those under the heavens.

Crickets called out to each other as you walked back from the goat pen, joined by other small creatures that lended themselves to the night’s symphony. Upon making it to the cottage, you hung your lantern on its rightful hook beside the front door. You’d really grown to like the place over the last month. It was made of clay and stone, and though it wasn’t overly spacious, the charm of it all was more than enough to lose yourself within.

You’d soon be heading back to the streets of Brooklyn, where everyone was burdened with the haste of chasing inescapable dreams.

Village life was slower, a necessary change in pace. And whenever you found yourself missing the bustle of home, Birnin Zana was never out of reach. It was Wakanda’s ever-lively capital city, brimming with people, thrills, and endless innovation.

Inside, Bucky stood in the foyer, hair still braided into the low bun a group of young girls begged to do. The braids were stylistically loose, and oversized to the point where one could miss them at first glance. But it was a good look on him, a bit rugged but not void of an underlying touch of regality. With the way he sheepishly smiled, you could tell he was anticipating your return, listening out for you. It hadn’t been too long since you’d gone to make sure the goats were secure for the night. It was the least you could do, considering everything he’d taken the helm of throughout the day.

After making it back home from the marketplace earlier that afternoon, he insisted that you relaxed as he put the food away and made lunch for the two of you. He’d even prepared dinner and washed the dishes afterwards.

As unexpected as it all was, it was nice. Not once did you complain, or ask why. You could see in his eyes that he was intent on making sure you felt especially taken care of. But that didn’t stop an innocent curiosity from swirling around in the back of your mind.

“Miss me?” There was a playful lilt to your voice. “The goats send their regards.”

Bucky chuckled and pulled you closer. He was wearing what used to be a long sleeved black button down. You’d cut off the sleeves some weeks ago at his request, but it was you who fell in love with how much of his musculature it showed off. The sheen of his vibranium arm was beautiful, and you were forever taken with the less overt strength of his right arm, how you could see his muscles and the delicate veins running beneath his skin.

The first few buttons of the shirt happened to be undone, and you took it as an invitation to kiss his sternum. A thin acacia wood necklace hung just below the place your lips met.

He let his chin come to rest on top of your head as he squeezed you tighter. “I was gonna ask if you wanted to go down to the lake.” You could feel the vibration of his voice running through his chest.

You pulled away to look into his eyes. “I’d love to.”

•••

From somewhere in the distance, melodious laughter carried all the way to the two of you. Gravel crunched beneath your feet up until it came time to divert off the main walkway and into the woods. You had to be careful not to trip over some of the thick tree roots growing above the ground in winding patterns. This time, Bucky was holding the lantern, the warm light illuminating your immediate path. You’d walked this route so many times that you were surprised the ground hadn’t been permanently imprinted with the memory of your footsteps.

It wasn’t long before you reached a clearing, where the lake elegantly spanned with the stillest water. It was beautiful, serene, even more so in the dark. Across the way, other lanterns shone in front of houses, appearing like tiny stars glowing on earth among men. A lone dock extended from the bank of the lake, and after stepping onto the wooden planks, you walked its length until reaching the end.

You were the first to sit, legs dangling off the edge. Bucky remained standing a little while longer, taking everything in with a thoughtfully revent gaze. When he finally sat down, the wood creaked, and he placed the lantern in the space between you.

Tree leaves rustled, insects called out to each other, and you could even hear the gentle burble of the water against the pillings of the dock.

Leaning back onto your hands, you turned your face up to the sky and let your eyes slip closed. It would’ve been easy to fall asleep as the ambience of the atmosphere wrapped you in its embrace.

Bucky studied your parted lips and bared throat, all while the urge to touch you itched at his fingertips. But he refrained from doing so in fear of startling you. That was all he’d been wanting to do all day; touch you, be near you, make you feel good and loved. Because that was easier than voicing what had been on his mind since that morning.

He’d awakened to the sight of your smile and the feeling of your fingertips drawing shapes on his chest. Like countless times before, he teased you about watching him as he slept, but this time you quipped back with a, that’s what angels are supposed to do. He’d smiled. Guess that’s why I feel safe here with you. Safe from ruminations about the past, from his own doubts. Of every corner of the world he’d graced, he’d found a true haven in you. And when you went on to tell him that you loved him in that sweet, drowsy way of yours, it truly did him in. The capacity to wait no longer resided within his being.

He wanted to marry you. He had to.

It was something he liked to believe he knew back when you first met, but it’d been way too soon to ask. So he waited; giving the two of you the chance to laugh together, cry together, and grow into each other. Coming to Wakanda hadn’t been for the sake of proposing because he’d been so wrapped up in the prospect of traveling with you, that he’d been oblivious to the obvious opportunity.

But he could see clearly now and feel it in his bones.

But he didn’t have a ring yet. By the time the two of you headed back to Brooklyn, however, he was certain that there would be one on your finger, dainty and elegant. He knew plenty of people who would be more than willing to help him find the perfect ring for you. Shuri would likely be the most enthusiastic of them all.

A sudden breeze rolled through, entrapping the flyaways of Bucky’s hair in a graceful dance. You opened your eyes, and looked at him just in time to see it. What stood out even more so was the fondness of his gaze when you realized he was already looking at you. It was as if he was letting the sentiments of his heart speak by way of his eyes.

One way or another, you always found yourself at the mercy of those baby blues. They were as unyielding as the night itself. You wanted to bask in the attention and hide away at the same time. Instead, you directed your gaze to the lake. The surface reflected the soft glow of the moonlight.

“I wonder what the water feels like this time of night,” you murmured after a while.

Bucky hummed. “Nice, probably.”

“I know we didn’t bring any towels or anything, but…”

“You wanna get in?” He offered a small smile. “I don’t think we’ve ever gone for a night swim. We can make tonight our first.”

•••

Along with the lantern, all your clothes had been left behind on the dock.

From his place in the water, Bucky watched the expanse of your back as you climbed down the dock’s ladder. The delicate motion of your spine made him want to slip beneath the surface and reemerge to make sure it wasn’t a dream—so he did. Closing his eyes, he sank down and allowed the water to engulf him like liquid silk, lukewarm and dense. In the few seconds that he was under, all else disappeared except for his own thoughts.

They were all about you.

When he came back up for air, you were wading towards him with a chuckle flowing past your lips. The water was still shallow enough that your feet reached the bottom, but more of your body disappeared beneath it with each step.

Bucky wiped his eyes and brushed his hair from his forehead just as you came to a stop in front of him. You reached out to tuck a piece he’d missed behind his ear. Tiny beads of water fell from his clumped lashes as he blinked at you.

“Not so bad, huh?” he asked. “Feels pretty good.”

“Mhm.” Then, unable to resist the childish urge, you flicked a little bit of water his way.

He flinched as a small sound of surprise escaped him.

When he moved to wipe his face again, you squealed because you were almost certain he was going to retaliate. But he didn’t. He simply shook his head and smiled in that soft way of his that made you weak in the knees. Your cheeks grew warm as you relaxed.

“Oh, c’mon,” you sighed, taking him in. The line of the water rested at the bottom of his pecks. Meanwhile, it spanned along your collarbones. “You can’t look at me all sweet like that. Now I feel bad.”

Amusement sparkled in his eyes. “A little water to the face never hurt anybody.”

The two of you shared an easy laugh. And when things grew quiet once again, his look shifted to the same one he’d given you on the dock, and multiple times throughout the day. The one that bared his heart, and left you unsure of what to do with yourself.

“Now, what’s this look been all about?” Your voice was almost shy as a tiny smile pulled at your lips.

Bucky shrugged as if to say nothing. But it was something. It was everything. You were everything.

“Wanna go out a little further?” he asked.

Wordlessly, you drew closer to him and hugged his neck. His bare skin brushed against yours as he hooked an arm around your waist, and ventured further from the dock. The water was smooth as you two glided through it, he was the one doing all the work. It eventually came to the point where your feet no longer reached the ground, prompting you to wrap your legs around his waist.

That’s when Bucky settled in a spot.

A beat later, he was pressing a short line of kisses to your cheek before finally meeting your mouth. The way his lips moved against yours was like a languid hunger. There was no overt sense of haste, but there was a depth and slowness that attested to him wanting to take in the entirety of your warmth.

It took a few seconds for you to remember to breathe. And when you did, you became all the more aware of the pleasant flutters surging throughout your body and pooling in your stomach.

He pulled away when you pressed one of your palms against his chest, digging your nails in just enough for him to feel them.

An apologetic look flickered across his face for a fraction of a second, but then he realized you weren’t looking at him as though he’d done something wrong. Your gaze held a gentle expectancy.

“I don’t think that look you’ve been giving me is nothing,” you told him softly. He felt your fingertips beginning to play at the nape of his neck, where his bun now sagged, dripping with water. “Especially when you’ve been so attentive to me all day too.” You leaned forward to press a kiss to the corner of his mouth.

There was a moment of silence before he spoke. “S’cause I love you.” He states that like its scripture, ancient text inscripted in stone sometime long ago. “And that’s the one thing I won’t mind doing for the rest of my life.

“It’s you, doll.” It always has been.

He touched his forehead to yours, and you understood.

The water continued to lap around you. It didn’t take looking up to the sky to know that this moment had been specially crafted for the two of you. You could feel it in the gentle fan of his breath, and in the shivers that ran down your spine as he caressed your back.

But, just because you could, you decided to look upwards towards the moon. Dull stars shone all around it, seemingly spanning for miles. The village elders were right about the expansive beauty of the sky. How it was a testament to life’s capacity to be filled with moments that took your breath away. Being in the lake, in Bucky’s arms, did just that.

He kissed the underside of your chin before your gaze leveled back out to meet his. Then he took your left arm from its place around his neck and pressed a wet kiss to your palm.

“You’re the one,” he murmured.

You cupped his cheeks in both hands, admiring his eyebrows, the bridge of his nose, his pink lips. “You already have my yes,” you promised, brushing your thumbs over his warm skin. “A million times over.”

The happiness coursing through his veins very well could’ve made him burst at the seams, but it was merciful enough not to. That didn’t stop it from shining through in the smile that stretched across his face and made light crinkles form at the corners of his eyes. He couldn’t help but lean forward and kiss you once again. This time, briefly.

But you chased after his lips and managed to land a few more sweet pecks until laughter was rumbling through his chest. He had to rework his grip on you as the water sloshed.

“Guess what?” You asked after relenting. “I love you all the way to the moon and back.” A proud smile spread across your face when he was unable to keep himself from letting out a little snort.

“I love you more,” he ran a thumb over your bottom lip. “You’re not getting cold or anything, are you? Wanna stay out here a little longer?”

You nodded earnestly. “I just want you to keep holding me. Can you do that?” When he opened his mouth to speak, you kissed his answer right from his lips, making his head grow fuzzier than it already was. “Can you hold me, baby?”

“Yeah. I can do that, pretty girl,” he murmured. “I can do whatever you want.”

Like a moth drawn to a flame, you pressed yourself even closer to his body, situating your arms around his neck yet again. This time, you rested your chin on his shoulder and closed your eyes. A little taste of forever.

There, under the moon with the man you loved, was right where you belonged.

Thank you so much for reading!

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#bucky barnes #drabbles #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes imagine #bucky imagine #bucky barnes fluff #bucky fluff #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky x fem reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky x y/n

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hamliet · 1 year

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Rereading A Storm of Swords

In light of my recent Fire & Blood reread, I decided to reread the whole ASOIAF series because, well, why not. Below are some general observations/musings on the themes, character arcs, alchemy, and foreshadowing. I’ll do this for the others as well. It’s not really a meta proper, so much as observations and thoughts.

Thoughts on A Game of Thrones here and A Clash of Kings here.

Themes

Duty vs Love

Again, Martin contrasts duty and love. Robb forgives Catelyn for freeing Jaime because "what you did, I know you did for love... Love's not always wise."

Meanwhile, Tywin treats his children as pawns, literally trying to marry them again and telling them they'll do what he tells them because of duty:

"Go," their father said. "We shall talk again after you have composed yourself. Remember your duty."

And Brienne defends Robert by telling Jaime that his rebellion is justified because of love:

"Why is it that no one names Robert oathbreaker? He tore the realm apart, yet I am the one with shit for honor." "Robert did all he did for love."

I don't really have a ton new to say that I didn't already say in my ACOK's post, but again, Martin doesn't seem to see duty/honor and love as actual opposites, but instead suggests there's a balance to be struck. The idea that duty at its most extreme transforms people into things, however, is something I'll talk about more later.

Individuality vs Ideas

Part of the reason ASOAIF is so complex is that it's deconstructing the idea that enemies and villains and "red shirts" are just empty ideas rather than living, breathing people. We have this idea throughout all books, but it's emphasized starting in ASOS:

"Enough." The Hound's face was tight with anger. "You're making noise. These names mean nothing. Who were they?" "People," said Lord Beric. "People great and small, young and old. Good people and bad people, who died on the points of Lannister spears or saw their bellies opened by Lannister swords.

Then we have Jon starting to empathize with the wildlings:

He did not want their friendship, any more than he wanted Ygritte's love. And yet . . . the Thenns spoke the Old Tongue and seldom talked to Jon at all, but it was different with Jarl's raiders, the men who'd climbed the Wall. Jon was coming to know them despite himself: gaunt, quiet Errok and gregarious Grigg the Goat, the boys Quort and Bodger, Hempen Dan the ropemaker. The worst of the lot was Del, a horsefaced youth near Jon's own age, who would talk dreamily of this wildling girl he meant to steal. "She's lucky, like your Ygritte. She's kissed by fire."

Martin also uses this "red shirts" idea to open and close the book in the prologue and epilogue. Chett and Merritt aren't particularly sympathetic characters on the outset, but from being in their mind, even if we see Chett as an incel-esque character and Merritt as a coward, we feel their fear and hopes and self-loathing too. It's impossible not to see them as human, and when they realize they're going to die... well. It leaves us with a strange feeling.

We Are All Just Songs

"We're all just songs in the end. If we are lucky." Oh look, we've got a title drop here! A title drop!

ASOIAF is playing with the ideas of stories. For example, characters like Sansa adore simplistic stories of courtly romances. Arya enjoys badass historical stories. Bran enjoys ghost stories. Daenerys enjoys stories about her family's history.

Well, any wonder each of their stories are deconstructing these ideas?

But Martin isn't saying stories are stupid or bad. If anything, he's saying we need stories. Stories are the ideals that help light our way through messy reality.

True Kings, True Knights

Throughout the first few books, we have Sansa telling us "he was no true knight" about the vile people serving Joffrey. The point isn't to mock Sansa, but instead to deconstruct her ideals. Through Sansa's pure-hearted belief and compassion, even for people like the Hound, they start to change and become more and more knightly.

Please note I'm not saying this is okay or whatever, just saying there is some romantic coding between them even when they're apart in the books. Should Sandor return and meet Sansa again, I would expect it to be a textbook chivalric romance:

a highly conventionalized medieval tradition of love between a knight and a married noblewoman, first developed by the troubadours of southern France and extensively employed in European literature of the time. The love of the knight for his lady was regarded as an ennobling passion and the relationship was typically unconsummated.

The "no true knight" mantra is also picked up this book by Brienne, who inspires similar change in Jaime. It's also repeated by Daenerys, with a twist:

"Some kings make themselves. Robert did." "He was no true king," Dany said scornfully. "He did no justice. Justice . . . that's what kings are for."

Again, I highly doubt we're going for a scorched earth burned ashes deconstruction here, but instead digging to the heart of what this means. What does it mean to be a just ruler for Daenerys? As much as she needs to mature and accept worser parts of herself, much like Sansa and Brienne, her general ideals are not themselves wrong, even if their application in the real world is messier than in songs.

Protecting the Innocent:

We have this theme throughout the story: those who protect the innocent are heroes. We even have this in the lore of the story itself, such as the Knight of the Laughing Tree (who is clearly Lyanna, and the incident clearly jumpstarted her relationship with Rhaegar).

Also, can't believe I have to say this, but in ASOIAF, hurting kids iz bad. It's particularly Bad. It's Bad Bad. (Nota Bene: I do not get how the House of the Dragon fans and even its actors do not get this very basic principle in ASOIAF). In earlier books, we had Ned full of regret for the deaths of Rhaegar's children and fear that Robert would hurt Cersei's. Now in ASOS, Martin hits us with this idea in almost every storyline.

Robb loses a lot of his army to punish someone who murdered two children in revenge for his own children. Oh look, it's almost like ASOIAF doesn't condone "an eye for an eye, a son for a son":

"They died," said Rickard Karstark, yielding no inch of ground. "The Kingslayer cut them down. These two were of his ilk. Only blood can pay for blood." "The blood of children?" Robb pointed at the corpses. "How old were they? Twelve, thirteen? Squires."

Then we have Daenerys and the Unsullied and the children crucified on the way to Meereen. The truly evil idea is seeing kids as a weakness, an idea that makes Dany "feel faint":

"To win his spiked cap, an Unsullied must go to the slave marts with a silver mark, find some wailing newborn, and kill it before its mother's eyes. In this way, we make certain that there is no weakness left in them."

Plus, it's stated directly:

Yet he saw himself as a hero, and heroes do not kill children."

Then we have Melisandre arguing that hurting children even for the best of intentions is the right thing to do, but the framing of this--through Davos' eyes--tells us this is completely wrong. Even if you lose your army and your life like Robb. Even if you lose everything. It's. Not. Worth. It.

The Lord of Light cherishes the innocent. There is no sacrifice more precious. From his king's blood and his untainted fire, a dragon shall be born.

(Clearly, this also foreshadows the demise of Shireen.)

Again, Davos, one of the most moral characters in this story, tells us directly what we should think:

"...what is the life of one bastard boy against a kingdom?" "Everything," said Davos, softly.

This storyline also seems to be combined with Nissa Nissa, even though Nissa Nissa is an adult and not a child, because Azor Ahai has to sacrifice what he loves most. Stannis will sacrifice Shireen, his child, because she's what he loves most, but it won't work. I'd suggest that the idea is less "Stannis just wasn't chosen" and more "don't kill the innocent."

If there is a sacrifice to defeat the Others, I 100% do not see a Nissa Nissa situation happening, but instead a willing self-sacrifice.

Look Back! Look Back!

All of the characters have to look back if they are to go forward, as Daenerys is reminded by Quaithe. The problem is no one's doing that in their quest to look ahead.

Tyrion: "Some part of him had hoped for less indifference. Had hoped, he jeered bitterly, but now you know better, dwarf. Shae is all the love you're ever like to have". He has to face what happened with Tysha, to face the fact that he participated in that and became her monster, to ever be a better man.

Arya needs to face herself as a Stark and as someone who wants a family even more than she thinks she wants to be powerful: "Jaqen was gone, though. He'd left her. Hot Pie left me too, and now Gendry is leaving. Lommy had died, Yoren had died, Syrio Forel had died, even her father had died, and Jaqen had given her a stupid iron penny and vanished."

And Daenerys has to face her father's legacy, and likely will when she accidentally sets off Dear Old Dad's wildfyre in King's Landing: "If she was not her father's daughter, who was she?" This is the central question of Daenerys' arc. Her identity is in her status as the last living Targaryen. The question is whether she wants to continue the Targaryen legacy of madness and slavery, or destroy it (which she's doing).

Foreshadowing

Arya

When thinking of the original outline Martin somewhat scrapped and that Arya/Jon idea, I do wonder if this is a leftover idea meant to tell us something about Arya's future (namely, that Gendry is likely her love interest instead of Jon):

Arya gave Gendry a sideways look. He said it with me, like Jon used to do, back in Winterfell. She missed Jon Snow the most of all her brothers.

Tyrion

Well, Tywin says this at the start to Tyrion:

You are done with whores. The next one I find in your bed, I'll hang.

The irony is Tywin won't find a whore in Tyrion's bed. Instead, Tyrion will find that precise whore, Shae, in his father's bed. And he "hangs" her by strangling her with that necklace.

Jon

Jon "had slain the wildling Orell, but some part of the man remained within the eagle." This is pretty likely foreshadowing for Jon remaining in Ghost for a bit before he's resurrected.

Jon and Daenerys

The story has a middle section somewhat littered with romantic longings and first loves. Daenerys is torn about Jorah, whom she doesn't love like that, and has a crush on Daario. She also sleeps with Irri. Arya and Gendry begin to show attraction. Jaime and Brienne. Jon and Ygritte. But here are some lines between Jon and Ygritte that hint at his romantic future:

She punched him. "That's vile. Would you bed your sister?" "Longspear's not your brother." "He's of my village. You know nothing, Jon Snow..."

"Then I'd push him in a stream or throw a bucket o' water on him. Anyhow, men shouldn't smell sweet like flowers." "What's wrong with flowers?"

Lol well at least she's his aunt?

Jon's already been strongly associated with blue roses, so this hints that Ygritte isn't a perfect match for him. She's kissed by fire, but not actually fire and air herself, like Dany is. Daenerys also liked the fact that the blue rose growing in a chink of ice at the wall "smell[ed] sweetly."

Lastly:

A son was something Jon Snow had never dared dream of, since he decided to live his life on the Wall.

Again, I feel like this might be foreshadowing for Dany and Jon having a child someday. The one thing that makes me skeptical and wondering if the child may be more metaphorical is the timeline--whether or not there's enough time for them to bear a child and save the world from the Others. That said, there's plenty of foreshadowing for it, so...

Sansa

The White Ghost clearly predicts Sansa's hairnet's role in Joffrey's assassination, as well as offers a prophecy of Sansa slaying a giant at, a giant who tries to destroy Winterfell. This may indicate Sansa literally kills a giant at some point, or it might be metaphorical. The one who needs to be slain by Sansa is Littlefinger, but he hasn't really been associated with giant imagery yet just kidding @isammy7936 pointed out the obvious: that the Baelish family crest is the Titan of Braavos.

There's a followup scene of Sansa tearing Robert Arryn's doll that destroyed Winterfell later in the book, in the presence of Littlefinger who was helping her build it. I don't doubt that Littlefinger will help Sansa claim the North at some point, but I also see him trying to destroy the Starks.

Jaime

Oh, Jaime.

I cannot die while Cersei lives, he told himself. We will die together as we were born together.

When I reach King's Landing I'll have a new hand forged, a golden hand, and one day I'll use it to rip out Vargo Hoat's throat.

Smells like foreshadowing to me, although I don't think it will be Vargo Hoat's throat he rips out, but Cersei's he strangles.

Alchemy

Daenerys and Red

Continuing with Dany's theme of becoming red, sulfur, fire and air, the first city she takes is Astapor, a red city:

In the center of the Plaza of Pride stood a red brick fountain whose waters smelled of brimstone, and in the center of the fountain a monstrous harpy made of hammered bronze... Even through the thickness of her sandals, she could feel the warmth of the red bricks underfoot.

The other red association I've seen is her dream that she is Rhaegar fighting the Others at the Trident. Most seem to think the battle against the others will end at Winterfell, which I tend to agree with. However, the fact that the final climax should involve red at some point makes me wonder, because this takes place specifically at the Red Fork of the Trident.

That night she dreamt that she was Rhaegar, riding to the Trident. But she was mounted on a dragon, not a horse. When she saw the Usurper's rebel host across the river they were armored all in ice, but she bathed them in dragonfire and they melted away like dew and turned the Trident into a torrent. Some small part of her knew that she was dreaming, but another part exulted. This is how it was meant to be. The other was a nightmare, and I have only now awakened.

Then again, fire is certain to be involved in defeating the Others, so it might well be red enough with that.

Bran and White

To continue the Starks are water and earth and white idea, Bran has this quote:

Moonlight painted the wet woods in shades of silver and turned the grey peaks white. Owls hooted through the dark and flew silently between the pines, while pale goats moved along the mountainsides.

Sansa and White

When I reread AGOT, I did take note that Sansa was given a red rose by Ser Loras, rather than the white he gave other girls. But in ASOS, Sansa talks to Loras about that very moment, and the point of this conversation is to reveal how little it meant to Loras. He gave her a red rose because he grabbed a red rose first, not because it meant anything. Seems like a meta commentary.

Arya and White/Water

When Arya dresses like a girl for the first time again, she wears something "lilac-colored, and decorated with little baby pearls."

Furthermore, Arya routinely stops to give water to the dying, even the executed. Even when people, like the Hound, ask for wine (red), she gives them water.

Brienne and Jaime

For Jaime and Brienne, there's very little I can say about their alchemical weddings that the fabulous @argentvive hasn't covered. The first is the dual in the creek, which is with swords and violent, while the second is in the bath. The first one is also littered with romantic and sexual imagery, and is frankly what I'd call metaphorical sex:

No sooner did she turn one cut than the next was upon her. The swords kissed and sprang apart and kissed again. Jaime's blood was singing. This was what he was meant for; he never felt so alive as when he was fighting, with death balanced on every stroke... He laughed a ragged, breathless laugh. "Come on, come on, my sweetling, the music's still playing. Might I have this dance, my lady?" ... She looks as if they caught us fucking instead of fighting.

Brienne is also marked as water/earth, and white, while Jaime is red and fire. Jaime tells Brienne:

Think of Tarth, mountains and seas, pools, waterfalls, whatever you have on your Sapphire Isle, think . . .

Jaime slid into the offered seat quickly, so Bolton could not see how weak he was. "White is for Starks. I'll drink red like a good Lannister." " "I would prefer water," said Brienne. "Elmar, the red for Ser Jaime, water for the Lady Brienne..."

But after their second chemical wedding in the baths, they take on each other's qualities much more. Jaime dons his white cloak, lives in the white tower, and gives Brienne his Valyrian steel sword, which is colored with Lannister red (and is also a phallic symbol).

Arya and Gendry

Arya and Gendry's scenes become slightly romantically charged in this book. After she dresses like a girl, this conversation takes place.

Gendry put the hammer down and looked at her. "You look different now. Like a proper little girl." "I look like an oak tree, with all these stupid acorns." "Nice, though. A nice oak tree." He stepped closer, and sniffed at her. "You even smell nice for a change."

They then fight in a scene that parallels the Brienne and Jaime wrestling scene above.

Reconciling Opposites:

Another idea in this book spoken of by multiple characters is that of reconciling opposites. That's what alchemy is fundamentally concerned with. Meera states that hate and love are essentially two sides of the same coin. Barristan says greatness and madness are the same. Melisande says:

"The night is dark and full of terrors, the day bright and beautiful and full of hope. One is black, the other white. There is ice and there is fire. Hate and love. Bitter and sweet. Male and female. Pain and pleasure. Winter and summer. Evil and good." She took a step toward him. "Death and life. Everywhere, opposites. Everywhere, the war."

Again, George has pretty much confirmed Dany and Jon are the Song of Ice and Fire, so they need to unite.

Tyrion

One thing I wonder about is the use of homonculus (sometimes represented as a dwarf) and a rebis in alchemy, and whether or not Tyrion is intended to be a portrayal of either or both or neither. Homonculi are sometimes called "monsters", a name Tyrion bitterly embraces by the end of the book. Oberyn says that after Tyrion's birth, there were rumors he had the genitalia of male and female, but Tyrion didn't. At the same time, he does have odd features like two different colored eyes, etc that might hint at him being seen as an alchemical rebis. I don't know.

Other Thoughts

Tyrion as a Targaryen

Not only do I think it doesn't thematically work to have Tyrion as a Targaryen, but I think the line used at the end of this book as evidence ("You . . . you are no . . . no son of mine") strongly indicates the opposite--that Tyrion is indeed his father's son. You see, Tywin literally says the exact same sentiment only a few chapters earlier to Jaime:

The strained silence went on until it was more than Jaime could endure. "Father . . . " he began.

"You are not my son." Lord Tywin turned his face away. "You say you are the Lord Commander of the Kingsguard, and only that. Very well, ser. Go do your duty."

If people want to argue the Tyrion Targaryen angle, this is not really evidence itself.

Tyrion the Monster

Tyrion's the first of the Main Six to dive off the cliff, starting at the end of this book where he lies to Jaime to tell him he killed Joffrey, desperate to hurt Jaime the same way he's hurting. He's enraged he literally saved the city and no one cares; they all just want him dead for his disability, for things he cannot help. He can't even find love because of it, and he craves love. So he finally decides to be the monster they think he is.

Insofar as the other two likely heads of the dragon go... I think they'll take similar approaches to their dark spirals. We see hints of it this book. Daenerys won't look back until confronted with it, so she'll probably be like "let me prove myself with fire and blood" (actually, this is exactly what her ADWD arc leads to her deciding to do). Jon notes the fact that people assume bastards are craven and scheming, and I do not doubt that is exactly what Jon will become after he's resurrected: he's probably going to ditch the Wall, the fight, and everything for a time.

Jeyne Westerling

Poor Jeyne. Despite her mother's machinations to get Jeyne to seduce Robb, I do believe she and Robb genuinely loved each other--as much as anyone could. Their story seems to be a deconstruction of the "love at first sight" trope, wherein they love each other but don't entirely know each other, and have to get used to each other as people rather than as just objects of love. Hence, Jeyne turning to Catelyn for advice. Which frankly was a wise thing to do :'')

The True Fight

Davos reminds Stannis what the true fight is: up north, fighting the Others. I'm sorry but I can't see the books ending with the show's ending, where the true fight is against humans. No, this isn't thematically contradictory with the idea that the story is about humanity or the human heart against itself; the opposite in fact.

The true fight all humans face is against death, and what we do to live in the face of the reality that we're all going to die.

#daenerys targaryen #jonerys #jon snow #alchemy #a storm of swords #asos meta #asoiaf meta #asoiaf #davos seaworth #stannis baratheon #jeyne westerling #jaime lannister #braime #brienne of tarth #sansa stark #tyrion lannister #arya stark #gendry waters #sandor clegane

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