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rutilation · 4 months

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This opening is replete with symbolism.

Flower language has been a recent fascination of mine.

Do you want to make my new hyperfixation your problem? If so, then let's take a deep dive into the first opening before the new one airs tomorrow.

Before I start, here are a couple of things to keep in mind.

While the use of flower language in this show mostly lines up with Japanese hanakotoba, there are still a number of flowers here that hold particular significance within Chinese culture, and thus have additional meanings that don't line up with those from Japan. I’ll be mentioning them alongside the Japanese meanings where I deem it relevant.

The following will contain light spoilers of content from the novels/manga which has not been animated at the time of writing. I'll try to be vague and sparing with it, but there are a few flowers I can't discuss without them.

Past the title card, the opening begins with eight blooming flowers dancing through the frame in rapid succession. These represent the storylines covered by the first cour of the anime in order of appearance, and each can be found in the episode(s) they signify. From the top:

Rhododendron: This plant is all over the first two episodes, so I'm going to cover its appearances before delving into its meaning. In episode one, there are two shots of the buds of this plant, one as Lihua gives birth, and then again as the doctor examines her baby. They're finally shown in full bloom as one of her ladies disregards the branch Maomao used to warn of the toxic makeup. In the following episode, Gyokuyou has seemingly taken a liking to the flower that saved her daughter's life, and a few clusters can be seen in a vase during several shots before Maomao uses them as an example of a seemingly innocuous plant that could cause accidental poisoning, and indeed, if you look closely at the background during the scene with the soldiers, you can see what appear to be rhododendron shrubs. There are actually quite a few different possible meanings for the many granular varieties of Rhododendrons/azaleas. Luckily, the characters said the name of the plant out loud for me: shakunage. So, this is Rhododendron subg. Hymenanthes. In hanakotoba it means dignity and majesty, but also, on account of its poison, danger and caution. Those last two meanings clearly line up with its ominous usage in these first episodes, growing and maturing as the babies grew sicker. But in addition to their function as a warning of danger, I think there's a case to be made that they also represent Gyokuyou herself. As I stated earlier, she starts keeping them after the first episode, and Hongniang later starts growing the closely-related azaleas in the jade pavilion as well. As for how its meanings apply to her, Gyokuyou is regal, magnanimous, and never loses her composure (unless it's at Jinshi's expense lol,) but she's also described by Gaoshun as shrewd and cautious, being unwilling to hire any lady she doesn't absolutely trust, and constantly gleaning information to send back to her family. These all fit with the dual meanings of rhododendron. In Chinese culture, rhododendrons and azaleas represent womanhood and passion, as well as home and a desire for homecoming.

Cotton rose: A type of hibiscus, this represents Fuyou, decorating both her person and her chambers in episode 3. It means 'delicate beauty' and 'graceful lover.' I think these are referring to both her skill in dancing, as well as her affectation of frailty and neuroticism. As far as I could dig up, its unique tendency to change color based on the time of day doesn't have particular bearing on its meaning in either Chinese or Japanese culture, but the story itself uses it as a metaphor for Fuyou hiding her passion, will, and cunning behind a wallflower exterior.

Balloon flower: In hanakotoba, it represents undying love, sincerity, and grace. These grow in the crystal pavilion, adorn the iconography of Lihua's furniture, and likely inform her blue and violet color scheme. Its last two descriptors gesture towards Lihua's style and personality. She's elegant and staid, but she also takes everything quite seriously, and wears her heart on her sleeve. As for the undying love element, I see that as alluding to her love for her son, her agony at his passing, and her hopes of reclaiming that love again through having another child.

Violet: This one actually tripped me up for the longest time. The flowers in the opening looked like hostas to me, but no matter how closely I looked at the backgrounds in this show, I couldn’t find anything along those lines. Eventually though, I caught on that these must be the violets from episode five, even if they’re a different color from those shown in the episode. And also droopier. Anyway, violets mean humility, sincerity, and ‘a little bit of happiness.’ In the episode proper, they are crushed underfoot as Maomao narrates about the lengths she had to go to keep herself safe while growing up in the red-light district, illustrating how even the modest aspirations of an ordinary peasant are in perpetual danger in such a cutthroat environment.

Chinese aster: Daisies and asters are my least favorite flowers to identify. They all look the same. As such, I’m a little less confident about this one, but I think it’s a Chinese aster. The leaves and buds look similar, and the context in which it appears in episode six suits its meaning. As Lishu’s ladies disparage her so-called pickiness, a shot of this flower opens the episode. While the Chinese aster’s meaning changes based on color, white in particular means ‘please believe me.’ I think that speaks for itself

Toad lily: This appears twice during episode eight, where Maomao gets drawn into the mystery of an attempted murder during her vacation. Toad lilies symbolize hidden thoughts and intentions, alluding both to the possible conspiracy on the part of the women of the brothel, and to the fact that Maomao will never really know the truth of the incident, having to content herself with speculation.

Sacred bamboo: This one is easy to miss, because while the plant is in full bloom in the opening, it’s laden with berries in the show proper. This is Nandina, a.k.a. the sacred bamboo, a mainstay of autumn and winter floral arrangements in both China and Japan. It’s considered auspicious, symbolizing a reversal of ill fortune into prosperity--the precise opposite of how it’s presented in episode nine of the show. There, Maomao fiddles with the plant as she contemplates all the instances she’s seen of good fortune being struck down by tragedy, and the prospect of that same sword of Damocles falling upon her head as well, a harbinger of eucatasrophe being used to symbolize straight catastrophe. Also worth noting is the fact that the plant is very poisonous, so much so that it has a reputation for killing any birds which try to eat its berries; I think that bit of trivia might be the inspiration behind the decision to ironically invert its lucky image. In addition to its central appearance in episode nine, it can also be seen in Lishu’s chambers in episode ten, mixed in among the vases of white camellias.

Japanese azalea: These mean passion and steadfastness, alluding, in my view, to Fengming’s devotion towards Ah-duo. Fun fact: did you know that honey made from toxic azaleas, termed ‘mad honey,’ is sometimes manufactured on purpose? It’s not super legal in most of the world, but apparently it can be used as a psychedelic.

After this, we see a panning shot of seven flowers, with the top four representing the high-ranking concubines, and the bottom three representing the high-ranking courtesans. While the first set of flowers grew from buds and flew across the screen, this set consists of still images. If I were to hazard a guess as to why, I'd say that it's because those previous flowers were conveying the movement of emergent stories, while these upcoming flowers portray the relatively static personality traits of individual characters. I'm going to tackle these in reverse order, as the first three flowers to appear are somewhat tricky to talk about.

Peony: This flower represents Gyokuyou, and in addition to appearing in her non-diegetic floral backgrounds, it also decorates the tapestries of the jade pavilion. In Chinese culture, peonies are one of, if not the most, important flowers. They represent feminine beauty, pride, honor, renown, wealth, prosperity, high-status, opulence, and a nobility of spirit. They are considered to be the king of flowers, and were historically only permitted to be grown by nobility. All of these superlatives are likely alluding towards Gyokuyou's status as the emperor's favorite consort, with the best shot at becoming empress.

Balloon flower: See above.

Lily-of-the-valley: This means purity, chastity, humility, and 'happiness will come again.' While the first three all seem to fit Lishu on their face, I find myself curious about the fourth meaning. I'm only partway through the third novel, but if this indicates that, at some point in the future, Lishu finally catches a break, then I'll certainly be happy to see it.

Dendrobium: In China, orchids in general are associated with elegance, refinement, and good taste, which fits with Maomao's description of the garnet pavilion as being beautiful in a minimalist sort of way. They also represent the virtues of an ideal gentleman-scholar: integrity, humility, temperance, and nobility. Furthermore, they are considered emblematic of spring; it, along with bamboo, chrysanthemum, and plum blossom, represent the four seasons. Returning to Japanese symbolism, the flower associated with Ah-duo seems to specifically be Dendrobium nobile. Nobile in particular means 'honest and to-the-point' in hanakotoba, likely alluding to Ah-duo's candid personality, and the fact that she is on casual terms with the emperor.

Regarding the final three flowers, the show itself doesn't explicitly tie any one of them to a particular courtesan--their flowers only appear as a group in episode twelve. But, by contemplating their meanings, and with some help from the characters' wiki pages, we can make some educated guesses.

Yulan Magnolia: This one, I'm guessing, represents Joka. On one hand, I'm kind of dumping her with this because the other two flowers just seem to fit the other two courtesans better, but its attributes nonetheless seem to accord what we know of her character--which admittedly isn't very much. In hanakotoba the yulan magnolia means nobility, sublimity and a love of nature. In China, its pretty similar: purity, nobility, dignity. It's also worth noting that they're commonly planted around Buddhist temples in China, and have been for many centuries, granting them an air of spiritual profundity. Joka is said to be aloof and cold, which is part of her appeal as a courtesan. While chrysanthemums and plum blossoms have a warmer aspect to their meanings, the loftiness of magnolia hews more closely to her characterization. Then there's the matter of her name, which is apparently a stage name. It translates to 'Lady Ka' (or 'Hua,' if you want to go with the Mandarin pronunciation.) Now, the 'ka' in her name is written as 華, and in the story, that character is only permitted to be used by the emperor and his family. So, for her to use it, even as a stage name, is a pretty bold pretense to nobility.

Chrysanthemum: In Japan, chrysanthemums are associated with nobility and the imperial family. In China, they are associated with longevity, endurance, and vitality, on account of their long-lasting blooms that persist late into autumn. I think this is most likely to be Pairin's flower. She's one of the few courtesans who's in her line of work because she wants to be, and is flourishing in an environment where others are desperate and debt-ridden. That covers 'vitality,' and Lihaku can attest to her endurance, if you know what I mean... Moving on, its mentioned in the novels that she's actually in her thirties, but still looks quite young, again harkening to the chrysanthemum's persistence.

As far as symbolism is concerned, chrysanthemums do seem to fit her character better than magnolias. But, something that gives me pause is her name, which means 'white bell,' on account of yulan magnolias being white and having a bell-like shape. I still think it's most likely that the chrysanthemum, and not the magnolia, belongs to her, but it was too notable a coincidence to not at least mention.

Plum Blossom: We can safely assume this one refers to Meimei, as her name is written with the character for plum. As plum trees are among the earliest to bloom each year, and will even bloom while snow still covers their branches, both China and Japan associate them with resilience, hope, inner-strength, and renewal. We don't know much about Meimei either, but my impression of her is that she seems to be the nicest and most even-keeled of Maomao's sisters.

Following this parade of showy flowers, we finally glimpse the emblem of our protagonist, Oxalis corniculata, the creeping wood sorrel, downcast and huddled amidst the underbrush of a forest. Whereas the other flowers we've seen thus far are primarily ornamental (even if some are also edible/medicinal,) wood sorrel is herbaceous and weedy, and is unlikely to grace any vases, wreaths, or arrangements. If it were spotted in a noble's garden, it would likely be uprooted, but to the peasant who finds it growing in a ditch, it's a tasty snack.

In hanakotoba, wood sorrel means joy, 'shining heart,' and 'a mother's love.' All three descriptors, I believe, are relevant to Maomao's character. Despite her flat affect, Maomao has a strong passion and sense of joie de vivre driving her through life. Those further along in either the novels or the manga will recognize 'a mother's love' as (somewhat ironically) gesturing towards her complicated relationship with her mother. As for 'shining heart,' I think that will become apparent as we go further through the opening.

But, before we do that, I'd like to take a moment to examine the moments when wood sorrel appears in the show itself. Thus far, by my recollection, it has appeared in episodes one, three, and twelve. The opening shot of the first episode is of a wood sorrel, informing the viewer in no uncertain terms that this is Maomao's flower, (in case the opening was too subtle.) In the third episode, several wood sorrels dot the field where Fuyou sits with her lover, symbolizing how Maomao has aided and protected them. In episode twelve, a single wood sorrel is tucked inside a lavish bouquet of her sister's flowers, a visual gag paralleling them fussing and fawning over her.

Returning to the opening, Maomao is shown contemplating a subtle glow in her closed hands while a reflected, sunlit version of herself glances back at her. Then, as all the previous flowers fall away, as Maomao casts the light up into the air, its glow illuminating her face, the wood sorrel finally stands upright, and blooms in full.

Now is a good time to mention a relevant characteristic of creeping wood sorrel: it only blooms in direct sunlight. When crowded by other plants, it curls in on itself, closing both its flower and leaves. This serves as a clear metaphor for Maomao's personality; under most circumstances, she seeks to be invisible and unobtrusive, but when she's in her element, she commands attention and respect.

Following this, we have her magical girl-esque transformation sequence, with her outstretched hands forming the shape of a blooming flower as she dances through a whirl of yellow wood sorrel petals. She then bows down in imitation of the flower, taking the light back into her chest (there's that shining heart I mentioned earlier,) as she dissolves into the stoic, unassuming version of herself once more, closing out the opening. (Jinshi who?)

I'd like to end this analysis with an observation. While the real wood sorrel exists at the perpetual mercy of outside forces, Maomao is not merely reacting to a light source that exists beyond her control. The light exists within her, and she chooses when it will shine down for all to see, and when she will hide it away in the depths of her heart. To those who've gotten this far, thank you so much for reading.

#the apothecary diaries #i like being mean to a certain someone #but i will note that i'm familiar with the interpretation that the lyrics of the op are written from his perspective #and i would agree that that reading has merit

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punkpandapatrixk · 1 year

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🥧The Love You Spiritually Deserve ♦︎ Timeless Pick A Card

‘Why do nice people choose the wrong people to date?’

‘Well…

We accept the love we think we deserve.’

‘Can we make them know that they deserve more?’

‘We can try.’

– Charlie asking his teacher in The Perks of Being a Wallflower

SONG for all piles: Coming Home by NCT U

MOVIE for all piles: My Week with Marilyn (2011)

[PAC Masterlist] [Part 2] [Part 3]

[Patreon] [Paid Readings]

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There is a very special behind-the-scene for this PAC on Patreon. If you’re already subscribed, don’t forget to check the full post ^o^v

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Pile 1 – A Love that Helps You Remember How Precious of a Darling You Are

VIBE: Promise by Jimin

to be in Love with the right person – 2 of Wands

The moment your sweet, sweet Heart recognises the person who’s right for you, baby, it’s all calm sunshine in your world🌤This person has a most peculiar ability to bring back nostalgic senses and memories of what you used to enjoy as a child. These are your Heart’s most honest desires that you might’ve suppressed or avoided to some extent, in exchange for being practical. You live in a world that’s given you reasons to abandon your own dreams in order to become practical and a responsible member of society. In many ways, I see you’ve tried to fit in and follow the expectations of a normal society.

But when you come in touch with the essence of this person who’s just right for you, everything changes. Suddenly, the scales blinding your eyes fall off and now you see the real colours of the world—your world. Literally this person brought your world back from the dead. Something about them rejuvenates your faith in the world you’re innately able to create for yourself. And just like that, you gradually move towards changing small aspects of your everyday Life to manifest a world of your dreams~🌷

You may return to old hobbies—perhaps resume your old piano lessons; you open up your dusty rice cooker recipe books (LOL) and start cooking again; you start singing again or you may finally join that ballet class you’ve always wanted to do when you were a child, irrespective of your age now. This person who’s just the right person for you is truly an angelic Human whose essence brings back peace of mind, Love (first and foremost for yourself), serenity, clarity, and most importantly, a hunger for Life and its endless possibilities🎋

the spiritual Home in your heart – 4 of Cups

I sense that your Soul is incredibly sensitive. You’ve probably come from other realms where the inhabitants are peaceful, and I feel strongly that you’ve often been gardeners and carers of animals in those other lives heheh You’re so spiritually in tune with the moods and sorrows of not only the people around you but also the world in general. You’re the type of person who sees a world that needs healing. You see a world needing more kindness, alas, your Kindness was taken advantage of and spat on. Then you decided to hide away and avoid people as much as possible.

Do you feel like you enjoy the company of animals, plants, and rocks more than Humans? Yeah, you can sense the spirit of non-Human creatures and you find non-Humans to be the gentlest, most understanding creatures. I think you should like to watch Studio Ghibli’s My Neighbour Totoro🐼I personally think you’re the type that would find comfort in a lot of Miyazaki Hayao’s movies because they depict the innocence of children and how they see the world with an eye for adventure. As flawed as they can be, characters in Miyazaki’s movies are understandably human and you desperately want to believe in a world that’s more forgiving like that.

Due to the nature of your emotions, you’ve often had these ebbs and flows of faith in your ability to manifest a world of kindness and gentleness that you’ve always envisioned for yourself. It’s like a painful tug o’ war between your faith in yourself and the world’s pressure for you to conform. But trust me, anybody who makes you question your values, dreams, visions, missions, and goals, are not your people. The right person(s) for you is someone whose heart is so kind and wide that in their embrace you are reminded of everything good that you deserve to see manifest in your own Universe.

up your Self-Love game! – 9 of Pentacles Rx

Ooh, I know you can’t stop admiring this person’s remarkably gorgeous smile~ But do you have any semblance of an idea why your Soul finds them so irresistibly attractive? Your person who lights up your dark horizon is a freaking multitalented King or Queen whose thirst for Life inspires a hidden courage buried deep within your psyche. When you look at them or hear their stories, you can’t help but notice that this is also a flawed human who’s beautifully aware of their own failings and shortcomings, but they work really hard at becoming a nobler version of themselves. A more astonishing expression of what’s truly good about them as a human being, in spite of everything.

Whereas you’ve tried to build an independent Life away from most Humans, this person helps you see that there is still good in trying to believe in Humanity. That there is still hope because after all the world is so big and there are many people in it. I have a feeling your person is able to hold such a positive outlook because they’ve been blessed enough with good company, maybe good family, too. So they naturally have this ability to balance the way they perceive bad people in the world.

I think their people are going to be your people as well. Their friends and family are going to admire you so much and be grateful that you’ve appeared in the Life of your person and even theirs. They are glad you’ve found each other, like they really think you’re good for each other as you’re able to hold Light for each other. You literally heal each other. Your person’s people, too, are going to see you for all the good that you are. A union with this person and their friends and family is going to remind you what a precious and talented darling you really are🧸

COMING HOME TO YOURSELF🔻🧡

remembering your innate goodness – Red Magus (Edward Kelly)

loving yourself as an act of rebellion – Priestess of Prosperity

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Pile 2 – A Love that Honours Your Innocent Rose-Tinted Glasses

VIBE: OMG by NewJeans

to be in Love with the right person – Knight of Cups

When your gentle Heart rests in the embrace of the person who’s right for you, you will know, this is a Soulmate. There’s no other explanation. You feel a strong sense of nostalgia, as if having known this person in another dimension. And when you recognise each other, it feels like, ‘Oh hey! I know you! Hmm…’ and your conversation flows so naturally as if catching up with an old, old soul friend~

Being with this person, you want to cuddle all the time. But not the oddly lustful or desperately clingy type. No, no, baby, this is pure, innocent, childlike Love. When your heart is attracted to the person whose Soul resembles your own, it’s pure bliss, comfort, safety. I think you’ll want to have a home with this person. You’ll want to build a home with them that reminds you both of the Home World your Souls came from. It’ll be a lot of fun! Because the person who’s just right for you also has the same fairy-like mind, sense and perception as you.

And holy cow you know what that means—this is someone who’s just as sensitive and considerate as you. They will really honour your rose-tinted glasses and not make you feel infantilised for the innocence you’ve worked hard to maintain. This is someone sweet, gentle, soft-spoken, incredibly polite accompanied by an out-of-place sense of humour, and a little awkward from time to time… depending on situation, I guess🦄

To be in love with the right person… you finally feel truly, genuinely seen for the first time. It feels cosy to not have to explain yourself exhaustively with words that often fail your true meaning🦦

the spiritual Home in your heart – Page of Wands Rx

Unlike most people, you’re not super ambitious or even industrious about most things. Others may perceive you as ‘lazy’ but the truth is you’re an Old Soul that remembers a time when human beings were able to live at a more comfortable pace. You can’t really bring yourself to fit in this new pace—the modern pace—because you think it’s silly that people rush to their graveyards without even stopping to smell the roses. And you want to smell those roses, all the time, you want to always be aware of all the roses and jasmines and lilies.

You can’t think of another way of living your Life. You’re quite stubborn about it because you believe in your own mindset. You’re actually a lot stronger than you may think. If there’s one thing you’re ambitious about, it is to maintain a world of your own aesthetic. I think you’re someone who’s deep down super aware of your birth right to live in a world of beauty. Sometimes you get confused about this whole endeavour because you feel like an alien in this strange world. But one way or another, you hold on to your own values and I think that’s super admirable.

Some of you who are younger may struggle a little bit with boundaries because you’re too kind. You’re really soft, gentle, compassionate and have an ability to welcome anybody who’s tired and weary. But often, people who are hurting and confused about their own place in the world could turn super spiteful towards those who are working on their own dream lives that do not agree with the convention. You really need to be careful with those whose envy has the potential to seep into your morphogenetic field and ruin your manifestations!

You can be super kind and still say no to those whose presence could jeopardise your peace of mind, OK? Also, I think you’ll really find respite in this beautiful playlist on YT, ‘Nakamura Yuriko Songs I Love’, when you feel a bit weary of people~

up your Self-Love game! – 6 of Cups Rx

So first of all, your generosity has a tendency of making you reminisce about the past. You sometimes miss the people who used to be there for you. This could be friends or family members. For some of you, this could even be a past significant other. You have a habit of romanticising pleasant memories you had with people whom you used to care about. This could lead you to a dangerous path of self-sabotage. You may want to sometimes text or call people who genuinely aren’t even deserving of your kindness, gentleness, or care.

To protect yourself, have the courage to completely and utterly burn the bridges to those you know are only acting as parasites in your Life. The way I see it, there really aren’t that many people who can fully understand and accept you the way your Soul Family does. So wait for them and make space for only them. And so, to make space for them, you need to vacant those who don’t belong! Blood is thicker than water? Bullshit. Soul is stronger than blood!

My advice to you is to get a pet instead so you have a company upon whom you can pour your nurture. I know you are somebody who likes to nurture and care for another being. So, this is the best course of action if you haven’t met anybody from your Soul Group🥰If not a pet, a plant works, too. Depends on what you like, really. All in all, know that you are deserving of good company that truly honours your kindness and wouldn’t take advantage of that softness.

COMING HOME TO YOURSELF🔻💗

remembering your innate goodness – Silver Astronomer (Galileo Galilei)

loving yourself as an act of rebellion – Priestess of Innocence

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Pile 3 – A Love that’s Grateful for the Fact You Were Born At All

VIBE: Kazamidori (Weather Vane) by Sakamoto Maaya

to be in Love with the right person – XI Justice Rx

Okay, you’re totally an Old Soul with an important mission, babe. I’m pretty sure you already know this. If you aren’t that aware of it yet, I’m still sure you’ve always had this feeling like you were born for a greater purpose. Like, no matter what, you just know somebody sent you here to do something amazing… but what exactly? Dunno. You’re just haunted by this feeling of having your time on Earth… timed. ‘I’ve got to hurry!’ So you scurry.

I think you’ve felt incredibly lonely for the most part of your Life on Earth. You’re an alien—actually, you’re an astronaut. Deep inside your psyche, you’ve always had this debilitating realisation of having been torn apart from your real Family. You know that your family on Earth is not your real Family. You don’t even look like them, you feel. All your wants and even value system as a person, not a single thing matches theirs. You’ve always dreamt of travelling the world over to search for your people. Doesn’t matter where; they must be somewhere. Just not anywhere near here.

Of all the piles, yours talks the most about having gone through a massive spiritual purging. At some point in Life you have or will experience this. Like a phoenix dying to itself and be reborn out of its own ashes transforming into something greater than all it’s ever been in the past. When you finally accept your magic—that you’re magic—you realise that you’ve always needed to be your own first love. The day you have/had this epiphany and come to love yourself absolutely fully is/was the day you realise that everything in the world will always be alright so long as you believe in yourself🐾

the spiritual Home in your heart – King of Cups Rx

I think you’re someone who easily falls in love with attractive people, passionate people, kindhearted people, dazzling people, generous people, talented people, and all that stuff. But… that’s all really child’s play. Puppy love, if you wanna be cute. Summer crushes, if you’re casual as fuck. But the truth is, deep, deep, deep, fucking deep somewhere in the most secret corner of your Heart, there is an essence of someone whom you’re meant to reunite with in this incarnation. Damn, you made a promise, OK? That you wouldn’t ever be, EVER, serious with anybody who’s not this person💍

Dang, the day you were born into this world, you were already married🤪You had been proposed to in the spirit realm🎎It simply wouldn’t work if it’s not your person😗And for that, I hope you honour this Love that you’re carrying in your Heart and work on your spiritual development or something, until Destiny (that tricky bitch) unites you both in the physical realm. Babe! It’s worth the wait! This is the ONLY Human on Earth who knows how to embrace all of you with all of the Love you’re so spiritually deserving🥺

A small percentage of you choosing this pile, I feel quite strongly, could decide to become a monk, nun, or any other type of a celibate person who has no business being in a romantic relationship or a sexual union with another living being. This deep Love that you carry around in your Heart is all that fuels you until the day you depart from this world. You’re deeply aware of how short a Human’s existence is and you’re looking forward ever so to the day you breathe your last breath and return to your One & Only who’s always been watching over you from the Higher Realms🎐

up your Self-Love game! – 7 of Wands Rx

With all of the above said, whichever group you resonate with, all of you choosing this pile are, again, haunted by the same feeling of needing to save the world. In a manner of speaking, because you’re an astronaut, it’s true you came here for an important Soul Mission, and for that you could ruminate too much about ways you can develop yourself to ready yourself for the world stage when the time is right. But that’s actually counterintuitive and could make your whole Earth experience miserable.

I know you find it immensely difficult to be Human… even just operating with a Human flesh bag is painful enough. Some of you may even have a chronic illness that’s constantly giving you bodily aches or that you find controlling your movements quite challenging. Perhaps issues with developmental disabilities, reduced/low dexterity, immune system diseases, dyslexia, ADHD, autism (varying spectrum), gender dysphoria, and all sorts of compatibility issues that could make Life on Earth quite unbearable to some.

Compatibility issues here means that your Soul can’t quite adapt to your Earthly body because you’re too advanced or that your Soul originates from a much purer state of being that the tragic density of this dirty Human World causes immense pressure on your whole mental and physical being. And for that, you could struggle a lot with constantly wanting to leave soon. As a way to numb yourself, you could fall into a tendency of wanting to always, constantly, tirelessly, unceasingly working on something, on yourself, as if scurrying for ways to die sooner.

But… babe… you have a place in this world. Slow down a little, allow yourself to breathe, and let the Spirit of the Planet speak its thanks and admiration for all you’ve done for Her.

COMING HOME TO YOURSELF🔻💚

remembering your innate goodness – Gold Physician (Hippocrates)

loving yourself as an act of rebellion – Priestess of Clarity

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rumble-aint-a-rumble-without-me · 1 year

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Hello bestie I am ur local simp, and i am on my knees begging for HCs of the greasers dancing with you in the kitchen, my preferences are Darry and Steve i am begging

A/N: Hey there! Thanks for requesting, I hope you don’t mind the wait. They’re a little short, but I hope you enjoy them!!

DARRY CURTIS

You wanna dance? In the kitchen? With Darry?

Oh honey, that’s nothing new, my boy loves to dance with you, especially during those quiet moments in the kitchen <3

Whether it’s in the morning where one of you’s fixing breakfast, or in the evenings when dinner’s been tucked into the oven and you have nothing else to do, Darry will definitely dance with you

He likes any of the slow songs that mean he can hold you close, tucking you into his body as you sway back and forth together and looking into your eyes, those little conversations filled with sweet nothings

SODAPOP CURTIS

Yes! I cannot stress this enough, Sodapop loves to dance and would give anything to dance with you

Your dancing is not limited to the kitchen! He’ll dance with you wherever, spinning you around at the drive-in or teaching you a few moves at a diner somewhere while the jukebox plays

He’ll slow dance? But he’d rather more upbeat dances, just cause he’s so energetic

But he’ll take the excuse to hold you close, kiss you gently and smile that smile that totally knocks you off your feet

PONYBOY CURTIS

I love Ponyoby with all my heart, but you can’t look at the boy and convince me that he doesn’t have two left feet

Like, I just know that both of his brothers and his mom did everything they could to try and fix that problem but it’s entirely unsuccessful

Plus? He gives wallflower vibes, so I don’t think dancing would exactly be his cup of tea especially not out on some diner floor or school dance, I can totally see him standing by the walls with a cup of that terrible punch and one of Soda’s ties around his neck

Having said that, I think he’d make an effort if dancing was important to you, like he’d offer to take you dancing and spin you around every once in a while

DALLAS WINSTON

The kitchen? Maybe not, Dallas really doesn’t have access to a kitchen that isn’t Buck’s little half-kitchen or the Curtis’ so maybe not the kitchen specifically

But dancing with you at Buck’s is definitely doable, especially if Dal has a few in his system or it’s not too crowded

Also a firm believer that Dallas has two left feet but it’s not as bad as Ponyboy and he can definitely do a little two-step and shuffle with you

He likes dancing with you because he likes having his hands on your waist, letting them drift as low as he can get away with to then bring you closer for a kiss at the end of the song

JOHNNY CADE

I see dancing with Johnny as like a soft and intimate thing?

So like, just the two of you, spinning and goofing around together when you go out or something, dancing to the Curtis’ radio in their kitchen and stuff

That’s not to say that he won’t dance with you to whatever song is playing over the speakers at the drive-in or to what the jukebox in the corner of the diner is playing, it’s just a lot less likely

But, if you beg and plead and kiss him just enough, I’ll guarantee that Johnny will dance with you, 1000%

TWO-BIT MATHEWS

Anywhere and anytime baby, Two-Bit is always going to be more than willing to dance with you

I’m not even joking, literally just say the word and Two will be tripping over his own feet to dance with you, he’s so excited <3

He has absolutely no shame when it comes to humiliating himself in public and I think a part of that factors into his dancing, he doesn’t care who catches you dancing and where you dance

So yes to the drive-in, yes to the diner, yes to whatever bar you may find yourself in on a date night, and a definite yes to dancing with you in the kitchen

STEVE RANDLE

I don’t know why, but I just feel like Steve would definitely dance with you, no questions whatsoever

I can just see him pulling you in for a quick little two-step whenever you stop by to see him at the DX, claiming that the song that started on the radio just has to be danced to as he pulls you in

Slow songs, fast songs, I just think he’d have a lot of fun dancing with you, no matter what!

And if you don’t think you’re a good enough dancer, don’t even worry about it, Steve’s not going to care and he’ll make you laugh so hard while you’re together that you won’t have time to stress about it

TIM SHEPARD

Soooooo I have a lot of thoughts when it comes to this greaser and one of the biggest one is how much fun he’d be to dance with-

He’s good at everything, even though he doesn’t look the type to be spinning around on some dance floor, he’s just got some sort of natural talent that makes him look astounding on the floor

Lines dances to slow dances and everything in between, Tim will have no problem dancing with you, especially after he’s had a few drinks and is feeling more laid-back

His hands might drift a little lower than your hips at times, but what else do you expect? He’s a hood! Besides, when you go to chastise him or move his hands, he’ll just give you this little smirk and how could you possibly be mad at that face?

CURLY SHEPARD

Unless he’s in a space where he feels comfortable, I don’t see Curly as someone who would frequent the dancefloor, it’s just not his space

He can do the dances? Would be down to goof off with you when it’s just the two of you? But he’s not big into the dance floor

Kitchen dancing though, that’s really his element and he’ll spin you around so gently, murmuring the lyrics to whatever song is playing while pressing kisses to where is closest to his mouth

10/10 experience, would highly recommend dancing with Curly as you’d feel so adored and appreciated!

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steddieas-shegoes · 11 months

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Another request idea! I was listening to What a Time To Be Alive by Fall Out Boy and the line "But, baby, please, I just need someone to hold me Even though you don't even know me" struck me as a particularly good steddie prompt. Maybe some hurt/comfort? Thanks for even reading this request!

Full disclosure: I never got really into FOB. I mean obviously love their classics. Anything that was on the radio I liked it just fine. But I did have to go listen and look up the lyrics for this one because just that line had me going feral with an idea. I've read a few fics where Steve and Eddie meet at a party, which honestly makes a lot of sense canonically. Eddie has the goods, parties need the goods, Steve threw a lot of parties. This is a slightly different take on that premise. It's a LOT of hurt, and a LOT of comfort. Steve is kind of pitiful actually, and I love that for him. Eddie's super into it too. Also tagged it light dom/sub because of nonsexual type things that happen while Eddie is comforting Steve. To me, since they didn't have a discussion about it and aren't in a relationship, it could just be seen as one dude kind of being a little pushy when taking care of another dude, but that tag doesn't exist so here we are. I hope this gets posted in time for you to cry in the school pick up line! - Mickala ❤️

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Steve should not have come to this party. Tommy always threw a huge one at the end of the year, right when his parents left for their anniversary vacation, and Steve always came.

But this year was the first year he hadn’t been invited by Tommy.

He really hadn’t been invited at all, but it was just common knowledge that it was happening here and now, so here he was.

No more crown, hanging onto his sanity by a thread, and his only friends were barely 13 years old.

Being a wallflower was a new thing for him.

He watches from the corner of the kitchen, sees the people he used to call friends getting drunk, getting high, dancing. It doesn’t seem fun anymore.

He’s glad that’s not him anymore.

So why does he feel like crying?

He holds it in, takes small sips of his beer, focusing on the bitter taste. He didn’t even like beer. Just drank it to maintain the King of Keg Stands crown

As the night drags on, it sinks in that he just doesn’t fit in this world anymore. It wasn’t made for him, he wasn’t made for it.

He didn’t really fit anywhere.

He choked back a sob, rushing out the back door of the house and down to the pond that Tommy and his dad fished out of.

No one ever went out here, too worried about bugs or snakes, but Steve couldn’t find it in himself to care right now.

His legs gave out when he reached the dock, his body sinking down to the wood below him as he felt tears fall down his face.

It wasn’t a panic attack, he’d had plenty of those, made it through plenty of them on his own. This was just sadness.

He was alone out here, not even the noise of the party to keep him company.

He was alone everywhere, really.

Sure, he had the kids. But they were kids. They hung out with him because he protected them, not because they thought of him as a friend.

His parents hadn’t been home in nearly six months, hadn’t called in two, didn’t even seem interested in the fact that he was graduating high school.

Nancy didn’t give him the time of day, nor should she after everything that happened.

The friends he grew up with, the friends he thought would be there for him, ended up being terrible.

“Shit, Harrington? Is that you?”

Steve sniffed.

He couldn’t be found like this, his reputation would suffer even more, somehow.

He wiped his eyes quickly, hoping that it was dark enough the other person wouldn’t see the movement.

“Uh, yep,” Steve managed to say after a deep breath, surprised that his voice didn’t sound as wrecked as he felt.

He turned around and saw Eddie Munson walking up the dock.

Everyone knew Eddie only got invited to these parties because he sold weed. Eddie himself only came to the parties because he knew he could make a killing just for showing up for an hour or two.

The only times he’d ever spoken to Eddie were to make sure he showed up for his own parties, offering him a tip of $20 just to come well-stocked.

He always came, never accepted the tip, and usually left a rolled joint in Steve’s room at the end of the party.

He didn’t think he did that for everyone, but he was too scared that it would stop if he asked.

“What are you doing out here?”

“Just felt like fishing,” Steve responded, slapping his hand against his face as soon as he said it.

“With your bare hands in the dark?” Eddie snorted. “I will give you free weed for a year if you can manage to do that right now.”

Steve cracked a small smile.

“Make it free weed for life and I may consider hopping in and giving it a try.”

Eddie’s laugh filled the night, loud and full of life. Something Steve needed to hear.

But Eddie sobered quickly, watching as Steve looked down at his lap.

“Needed a break from the party?”

“Guess so.”

“It didn’t seem like you were doing much in there.”

Steve just shrugged, not sure how to explain without crying again.

But apparently Eddie wasn’t going to let him get away with that.

“Heard about you and Nancy, man. Sorry it didn’t work out,” Eddie said, nudging his shoulder with his hand.

He was really close, close enough for Steve to feel the warmth radiating from his body. It was that awkward time between spring and summer, and the night was warm, but it still felt nice.

He hadn’t had someone so close to him on purpose in a long time. Maybe if he scooted an inch to the left, he would brush against Eddie’s hand just right and-

“Shit, you’re crying again,” Eddie said.

His hand was suddenly on Steve’s shoulder, and Steve shivered at the contact.

He closed his eyes and realized that, yes, he was crying again.

Dammit.

Warm, strong arms were wrapping around him, pulling him tight against an equally warm, strong chest.

He let out a sob, his chest hurting with the effort it took to hold in as much noise as he could.

A hand was in his hair, fingers carefully running through the length of it.

“It’s alright, sweetheart. Let it out. I got ya,” Eddie was saying quietly against the top of his head, his breath sending shivers down Steve’s spine.

Steve couldn’t catch his breath. The way Eddie was holding him, talking to him, caring for him, it was more than he’d ever really had.

He knew he’d never see or talk to Eddie again, so why not embarrass himself?

“Match my breaths, Stevie,” Eddie calmly tried getting him to calm down.

And he could if he tried, he knew he could. He wasn’t having a panic attack, just a breakdown he’d been meaning to have for a year now. He needed to get it out.

“Look at me.”

Eddie’s tone was different now, deeper and difficult to ignore.

Steve looked at him, eyes wide, wet with tears still falling. His nose was running, he could feel it starting to drip, but Eddie was holding him tightly, and he couldn’t move his hands to try to wipe his face at all.

“Good boy.”

Steve shivered again. He blamed it on a chill in the air, but he knew that they both knew there was no chill in the air.

The air was humid, a rainstorm expected the next day keeping the environment around them stale and still.

“You can cry as much as you want, but you have to breathe. Understand?”

Steve nodded, taking in a shaky breath.

“Better,” Eddie smiled, his face still showing concern, but relaxing when Steve started taking more frequent, slow breaths.

He felt less tears gather and fall the more breaths he took, his eyes never leaving Eddie’s smiling face.

“Doing better, sweetheart?”

Steve nodded, but he still felt the lingering loneliness, knew that when Eddie left him, he’d be back to square one.

“What’s got you so upset, huh?”

Steve shrugged, letting his head rest on Eddie’s shoulder.

“Did someone hurt you?”

What a loaded fucking question that was.

Yeah, a lot of people hurt Steve, for as long as he could remember, emotionally and physically.

But he wasn’t about to spill his guts to Eddie, even if he was being nice. He didn’t know the guy enough to start talking about his abandonment issues.

Eddie’s hands were running along his back, soft and then harder, soft again, then settled in his lower back.

His hands were big, bigger than Steve’s even, and his fingers were long. His splayed out hands covered all of Steve’s lower back area.

He felt covered, protected.

He didn’t want to get up.

“Steve, if someone hurt you, you need to tell someone. It doesn’t have to be me, but maybe your parents or the counselor.”

“Can’t tell my parents if they’re the ones who hurt me,” Steve spoke before realizing what he was saying.

It hit him so suddenly, he started to pull away, a small whimper leaving his body without his consent.

But Eddie wasn’t letting him go, tightened his arms around him and shushed him gently.

“Hey, stay with me. We don’t have to talk about it, let me just hold you a bit more.”

Steve gave in. He couldn’t understand why, or how, or what was running through his mind. He just knew the way Eddie was holding him made him feel whole for maybe the first time in his life.

He chased that feeling, sinking further into Eddie’s chest and letting the man rock him back and forth slowly.

Thinking went out the window as one of Eddie’s hands slowly brushed through his hair, then a finger slowly traced along his hairline, down his jaw, over his lips.

The whimper he let out now had nothing to do with being upset.

“Okay, sweetheart?”

“Why are you being nice to me?”

Eddie’s fingers froze, but only for a moment. Steve knew he’d never outright bullied Eddie, had probably been nicer to him than most of his friends had, but it didn’t change the fact that he’d never been particularly kind either.

His finger moved back along his lip, then up along his nose, then to his forehead. It was like he was trying to commit everything to memory, soaking every moment of this up because he didn’t think he’d have it again.

And maybe he wouldn’t.

But Steve wanted this to happen again when he wasn’t having a mental breakdown in Tommy’s backyard.

“Because sometimes there’s a lot more to people than what everyone sees and I think I see you a lot better than most people do. I don’t need you to explain anything to know you’re hurting and you don’t deserve to be.”

He said it like it was simple, like it made all the sense in the world for him to comfort him.

Maybe to him it did.

“But I was an asshole.”

“You were. But it doesn’t take a genius to see you aren’t anymore.”

“How do you know that?”

Eddie was quiet for a minute, his fingers moving back to Steve’s hair and tugging gently so he had to pull away from his chest and look at him.

“The old Steve would have never even given me a chance to help. He also wouldn’t have been standing by the wall for a party like this or escaping to a secluded area to cry. The old Steve wouldn’t be looking at me like you are right now.”

“How am I looking at you?”

“Like you want me to kiss you,” Eddie smiled.

He said it easily. Like saying it wouldn’t have made most other guys punch him immediately.

“And if I do?”

“You’ll have to ask nicely. You may be a changed man, but I do deserve some manners.”

Steve smiled at him, his charm replacing any lingering sadness.

“Oh? So if I were to lean in and kiss you that would be rude? I need to say please?”

Even in the dark, Steve could see Eddie blushing.

“I’m not stopping you,” Eddie finally said, voice strong despite the redness of his cheeks.

“So if I said please, you’d kiss me?” Steve asked as he inched closer, his breath hot against Eddie’s lips.

“If you said please, I’d do anything you wanted,” Eddie gasped out.

“Please kiss me,” Steve breathed out, his lips gently grazing against Eddie’s.

Eddie pushed forward the final centimeters, his lips warm and wet against Steve’s.

They both groaned into the kiss, Eddie’s hands cupping Steve’s jaw to keep him there.

Steve moved so he could straddle Eddie’s lap, his hands resting on Eddie’s shoulders as he finally gained the higher ground.

He realized quickly he didn’t want it, not with Eddie.

He let out a whimper and Eddie pulled away for a moment, but only to smirk and nudge him back.

“This dock isn’t gonna collapse under us, is it?”

“Don’t know,” Steve supplied as he settled on his back, Eddie hovering over him.

“Guess we’ll have to find out.”

Eddie’s lips were back on his, demanding, but slow.

Minutes passed, maybe hours.

Steve felt safer than he ever had, here under Eddie, with every possibility that someone could find them eventually and not giving a shit about it.

Eddie would keep him safe.

He didn’t know Eddie well, but he knew that much.

No one who helped a known asshole when he was having a breakdown at a party would just leave him to be beat up for kissing a dude.

The way Eddie touched him, rough hands fluttering over any place his skin was visible, lips and tongue making new patterns against his own, it felt like Steve was being cherished, appreciated, loved.

If this was all he ever got, if this is all he ever felt and tasted of Eddie, he thinks it would be enough.

Or it wouldn’t and he would never feel like this again.

“You’re thinking too loud, sweetheart,” Eddie mumbled against his lips.

“Just feels good,” Steve added, placing another kiss against his lips.

He could feel the shift, the way Eddie was slowing down, pulling away inch by inch.

It wasn’t enough.

Steve whimpered.

“Sh. It’s okay, Stevie. We’re just pausing for now,” Eddie moved back, kissing his forehead before there was too much space between them.

He heard voices in the distance, a reminder that the party was still happening and possibly wrapping up.

“Did you drive here?”

“I walked.”

“You walked?”

Eddie sounded upset.

“I’m only a street away. Not a long walk.”

“I’ll drive you back to yours. Walking this late after so many idiots have been drinking and plan to drive is dangerous.”

Steve rolled his eyes.

“I’m not a damsel in distress or whatever they’re called.”

“Ah, but you are. Crying alone outside in the dark, waiting for a big, strong man to come save you? My chariot awaits!” Eddie was helping him stand as he spoke, then bowed and gestured towards the road where his van must have been parked.

Steve couldn’t help the laugh he let out.

Yeah, maybe he was a damsel in distress. Maybe he would let Eddie rescue him.

Maybe he didn’t have to be so lonely, at least for tonight.

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #steve is so lonely #this is pre-season 4 #hurt/comfort #ficlet #request

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candywife333 · 2 months

Text

F*** The Pyramid

PART 1

Genre : Historical

PAIRING : yandere-ish Duke Jungkook x spinster social pariah chubby y/n

Inspired loosely by the Pyramid Games (kdrama which you guys should totally check out) and a novel called ,"The Captain's Wallflower"

Warning: This fic has minimal to no proofreading and the usual blend of outlandish comedy , crude jokes with expletives, smut, and angst (because I can't do without it). This is purely fiction and not a representation of the real Jungkook's true character or that of any other member of BTS.

Currently a trilogy ( thinking of making it a series with all other characters of BTS)

Summary: Duke Jung kook remained the quintessential peer of the realm, born with a platinum spoon in his mouth from the day he arrived into the world. He grew up playing a massive role in determining the structure of the social hierarchy----who gets to be the diamond of the water, the most eligible bachelor (other than himself of course), and.....who gets to be at the bottom of the pyramid ;the very dregs of society, the spinsters and ruined women who would never have a chance at a better life.

His bevy of associates all wealthy and powerful comprised of ; Marquess Taehyung, Baron Jimin, Viscount Yoongi, Viscount Hoseok, and Duke Namjoon (close advisor of the king)--formed the Pantheon (a group of wealthy and powerful men that ruled England). He lived the ideal life, the envy of all others..... or so he had thought. Till he met, Spinster Y/N--- the illegitimate daughter of Baron Stanton. They say, if she looks like a spinster, smells like a spinster (of lavender and epsom salt) , and tastes like a spinster ( though who would ever choose to taste one?) ----then she must be one. But something about Y/N was peculiar. She definitely seemed to be a spinster in name and mannerism. But was she truly one? And what was she hiding?

Cameos: Hwasa (my queen), Chungha, and many others

Part 2

I yawned again. And again. And again. Munched on a croissant. And then proceeded to...yawn again. So boring. I would never deign to come down to London for a Season ever again. That was the only modicum of comfort I was looking forward to. Never showing up here again. The scene would never change, so what was the point? Aunt Alyssa, my mother's older sister, had insisted that I accompany Solji to her debutante season----where she would be introduced to all the other pompous, rich, uninteresting, vapid members of the ton. So she could find an uninteresting, rich husband to marry who would inevitably cheat on her with a mistress and she could pretend to be happy and have his ugly nonsensical big headed babies pushed out of her vagina and die....eventually. I know, my view of the ton and life amongst them is anything other than comforting. Yet after watching so many seasons go by, sitting on my bench (I called it my PERCH) like a cockatoo at the rotten old age of 26, my views were firmly engraved into stone. Nobody could convince me otherwise.

The entire point of the ton's existence was enforcing social hierarchy. There was no other point. True friendships are meager and rare, sanctity of marriage has no meaning ( with affairs flourishing abundantly in dark corners of Vauxhall ) , and love is nonexistent. Love, a concept I had pondered for ages as I watched naive gullible debutantes waltz around with their chosen well-to-do suitors. Suitors that proclaimed sonnets of love initially, yet inevitably lost interest in their gullible little guppy fish wives and relegated those same foolish wives to country estates never to be seen again, so they could priggishly jaunt across London with mistresses on their arms---to operas and **gasp*** decorated bedrooms. Showering attention on mistresses and maids and any other women of relatively low standing --- to suck at their grotesque, syphilitic cucumbers.

Abhorrent. Men never made sense to me, and I was convinced that love was a construct they came up with, to fool women to do their bidding. I mean, at this point, having seen what I have seen, I wonder if they even believe in the hoax called love themselves. My concern after sitting here on my perch for the last 7 seasons since I had come out, is that not once had I been asked to dance. I mean, in the grand scheme of things, I guess it made sense? Chubby , wearing spectacles, and unappealing dresses with colors and designs of years gone by, definitely would not make me the toast of the season by any chance.

Yet, even when I had been a bit more fashionable, and when father had been alive and still holding the position of Baron--I would've expected few offers of marriage by fortune hunters merely seeking my dowry. But alas... that was not be. One girl, that debuted the same year as I did, daughter of Duke Asbury, Lady Seulgi had tripped on her feet while dancing the waltz, into the arms of Baron Jimin , bowling both of them over to the cold marble floors of the ballroom rather unceremoniously. She had bemoaned to the rest of the debuting girls (including little old me) that day, languishing on a chaise as she gesticulated nervously, " I am a miserable dancer. How will I ever survive this wretched Season"?

I had quietly tried to suppress my giggles at her ridiculous tirade. What could she even mean? She was proclaimed the diamond of the first water instantaneously after being presented at court that Season 7 years ago, earning the attentions of all the members of the Pantheon and many other wealthy peers of the realm. Her life was easy. All she had to do was do nothing. Yes, I said it. Merely, NOTHING. Her fate was decided from her birth. Not like the rest of us, who were not conventionally attractive and now.......financially destitute. She had earned the good grace of everyone from birth due to her wealth and strong connections. Even if she had farted, everyone would have applauded her flatulence.

These were the women I didn't understand. The ones who had everything, yet bemoaned their lot in life----frivolous ninnies in my opinion. All the women of the higher echelons of society remained there --marrying similarly wealthy lords and preserving their lineage and wealth. You may ask---is there no social mobility? And I would say, of course bloody not---you simpering little sot. What did this look like? A fairy tale? Cinderella? Princes of good moral standing don't exist. Rich men have options. And they always avail them. Why would a rich man marry a poor woman? Lust. That would be the only real answer.

I know I sounded jaded, and I definitely was. You can only be a trampled on flowerbed for so long, till you start festering and molding with bitterness. I do not profess to be better than anyone else. At times over the years I had wished to feel beautiful, marry a good match, and have a family. But that destiny clearly was not in store for me. The complicated reasoning being that I simply was not conventionally attractive and did not inspire lust in men, and that my father's rather paltry dowry did not inspire even mere greed in men . I am socially inept and quiet by nature. These were all valid reasons.

But, the simple reason I chose to believe---is that one man merely found no utility in me. Who you may ask? Duke Jungkook I would say, without even flinching or stuttering. Others thought "society at large" did not care for them, hence they were mowed over to the corner to become rotten spinsters and outcasts. You know who society was? Duke Jungkook and the members of his Pantheon. But he was still the mastermind. Slickly manipulative, handsome, and wealthy.

He was born sitting on a golden throne, and over the years proved that he was an intellectual. Silently accruing further wealth for his estate through trade and industry---something the Ton usually looked down upon. But since it was Duke Jungkook, it was permissible. Everything was in his case. He was the exception to every rule. If his character description stopped at this, we would have all been fine. But one thing Duke Jungkook seemed to crave is control. He was hyper competitive because he lusted after control---and it's close comrade, power. Power over even the pitiful members of society, he had no business trying to control. He played God for years, and always got away with it.

How do I know he's the one running the show you ask? Well, I had time to observe. And I would say, that is my only true talent. I notice things others don't because I am invisible. A mousy little mite relegated to my pitiful perch. And I noticed everything, from his wagers which either demoted or elevated people's social standings---to the way he manipulated people with misinformation and rumors. He decided who was popular. And he decided who wasn't. And if anyone was to blame for my social standing, I would say it was him. What he had done 7 years ago had reduced me to my position now. It wasn't even anything all that dramatic. He cut me down without even a fight.

I remember it as clear as if it were yesterday, even now.....

"I am so sorry, Lord Jungkook, I wasn't watching my step, please forgive me", I had stuttered in an overly fuchsia dress akin to a little sausage as I sweat incessantly in the stuffy ballroom. Hadn't meant to spill a chalice of lemonade on his coat.

His dark eyes gleamed with amusement and something that I identified as calculation later on in my life , as he brushed it off with a wave of his hand, "Tis' of no import, Lady Y/N. Don't worry". I nodded and curtsied towards him, "Thank you for overlooking my clumsiness, Lord Jungkook. I am sorry to disturb your evening".

I had thought he had truly forgiven me. It wouldn't ruin his reputation, our encounter. It was the mistake of a newly debuted girl, more akin to a child than a woman.

I had believed in the kindness of men and humanity till then. Till he chuckled and slyly condescended in a rather loud and cloyingly sweet tone of voice, "Of course, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. At least you are not as clumsy as your mother in concealing her relations or as clumsy as your father in the way of estate management". He sauntered away lazily as he left me to deal with the fall, whistling a merry tone juxtaposing the social demise he had just inflicted upon an innocently naive girl.

Casually cruel in the name of being honest. Everyone in the ballroom had heard, their eyes and ears peeled towards any interaction involving him as they do generally, as moths do towards a flame. Only Lord Jungkook would know my dad's poor financial status even as a Baron, or about my mother's affairs which had wrung him dry emotionally. Father had resorted to ruining our meager wealth by letting the estate go to spoil. He soon after died of heartbreak at my mother's affairs a year after this horrendous moment.

He had borrowed a massive amount of money from Duke Jungkook, money he would never be able to repay. When he died, the Baron's estate and debt was inherited by cousin, leaving me and my two older sisters with nothing. Thankfully, my sisters were already married off to decent, financially stable men---though they were mere vicars. Not men with titles, but reliable nevertheless. And I was left an orphan. Looked down upon and pitied by my beautifully polished sisters, and members of society as I was unmarried and ineligible according to my looks and lack of dowry--and Duke Jungkook's honorable estimation of my worth (or lack thereof).

Duke Jungkook had ruined my life long before dad had died, and the mere sight of him would remind me of my downfall to this day.

I hated the man to his day, teeth gritting unconsciously. If I ever came across the man in need, I wouldn't hesitate to ruin him. As he had ruined me. He had opened up to the mockery and disdain of the ton. I didn't get invitations to most balls and events by then. The only few I did get invited to were due to my Aunt Alyssa, or shall I say Viscountess Alyssa. I was unmarriageable nevertheless. And I had only stuck around to earn some money by being companion and chaperone for Solji.

The plan was to leave this horrendous place of twinkling lights and crushed dreams for a family--for a baby (a dream I had cherished in my heart of hearts for quite some time). I just wanted to be left alone now. Away from Duke Jungkook's paralyzing serpentine glances that decried me of my humanity and value, and the snickers from other wealthy men at my nunnish appearance. I would go live in a 3 bedroom cottage on the countryside, the only thing that had been entailed to my name in father's will which had not been of any value to debt collectors.

It was a beautiful cottage, tucked away near the edge of a meadow in a quaint little town called Chestershire. We had family vacations in my childhood there. It just required some repair and warm touches, to become a lovely house. I had earned money as companion to Aunt Alyssa so that I could retire there without worrying about money for at least the next 2 years. I would probably start selling garments I had knitted and sewed over the years as well, once those funds ran out.

Just thinking about the cottage and the quiet life awaiting me, filled with baby chicks and piglets and a warm hearth devoid of judging glares filled me with happiness....something I had not been acquainted with for a long time, as a soft smile brightened up my face .

Couldn't wait to leave the bloody pyramid. Every dog has its day. And mine would arrive tomorrow.

Only , if I had known that destiny always knows how to kick a girl in the arse, just when she believes the worst is over.

--------------------------------------

I arrived around the evening of the next day after a garrulous carriage ride had tossed me up like a well done egg salad 30 times. The travel was terrible and yet the journey was definitely worth it. Meadows filled with various flowers and fruits stretched up and over sprawling green hills in the weak light of the setting sun , all cresting into a peak at the top of the hill---my home, my cottage. It was just as I remembered it, a homely cottage wrapped around by rose bushes and creeping stalks of bouginvillea and tulips.

The main village center was just a 3 minute walk away, but felt much further away from everyone else, with the way it was situated upon a tiny hill surrounded by an expanse of trees giving plenty of shade to the cottage. I paid the coach man and walked up the hill, sweating and dusty from the ride. As I came up to the door, I could smell the fragrance of a hearty stew wafting out of the window.

Who was in there already?I knocked on the door and was met with a swinging door that gave view to an overgrown golden retriever jostling me to the grassy ground with enthusiastic licks. A buxom lady with sparkling green eyes, and thick brown hair in two plaits exclaimed happily, "Oh, darling Y/N, tis' been a long while since I saw you. Must've been when we were kids, still digging worms from the pond and making little houses for them".

I remembered who it was. Sunny, my old maid's daughter-- who I had played with in my childhood. I patted the dog on its head as I got up, brushing grass from my skirts, enveloping her in a rambunctious hug with a wide grin, "So good to see you sweetheart!!!! Where is your mother? Is she in good health?"

"Oh, she's fine Y/N, just back at home because of her rheumy joints. She finds it hard to keep up with maintaining the cottage, so I am doing the job as of now." I smiled warmly, my insides singing with joy at the jubilant welcome back home. I truly felt at home for once.

Chestershire still remained the quiet town I remembered it to be, idyllic and pasotral. It was a wonderful change of pace--fresh air and sprawling greenery so much the eye could not contain. She grabbed me by the shoulders and hustled me into the clean , well maintained cottage. It was a beautiful interior with leviathan bay windows and plenty of comfortable seating space. I inhaled the hearty potato stew into my mouth, discussing my plans with Sunny on how to make the cottage even more homely and regarding repairs to be done.

Apparently a tiny sum of money was provided by father's will to go for maintenance annually to the cottage. That is why the place hadn't fallen into complete disrepair. It just needed a few homely touches, some floral printed curtains and doilies and warm rugs and blankets. Along with some vases that could contain flowers which shrouded the cottage window-sills.

I had my work cut out for me for the next week. But this work was more welcome than anything else I had had to deal with uptil now.

--------------------BACK IN LONDON

Lord Jungkook was pondering something of the utmost importance at the moment as his valet stared at him, eyes agog with concern. The cravat he was to wear today to Lady Esterly's ball held much salience. It had to be something somber to indicate respect towards the end of her grieving period, yet not so outrageously dark in color that it would be utterly unfashionable. She had lost her gouty ill tempered 70 year old husband few months ago to sickness. And though she was clearly happy to lose him, it would be unbecoming to demonstrate those sentiments in public.

As Jungkook entered the ballroom , something in his subconscious pricked at him. What was this uneasy feeling? He hadn't felt this way since 7 years ago when he had found out that Lady Y/N's mother was having an affair with his father, who had been Duke of Somerset at the time.

His father had been a wealthy and powerful man who had always seemed to always adore Jungkook's mother, the Duchess Somerset. Yet, he had done the exact opposite and when she had least expected it, well into their marriage of 30 years, taken up a torrid relationship with Y/N's mother. Jungkook's mother had died of grief merely a year after his father had made his affections not so secret to society. And his father soon followed her in death due to his weak constitution, succumbing to infection in the winter. Y/N's mother had been left to grieve the passing of his father and her husband that same year. She stayed with one of Y/N's married elder sisters.

He had never noticed Y/N's existence till then, till he found out whose daughter she was as she had scurried around the edges of the ballroom like a nervous rodent since her debut in Society. She wasn't much of a beauty to look at with plain features, full cheeks and a plush frame that seemed more matronly and frumpy than anything else. Her only redeeming feature were her sparkling eyes and lush hair that served to hinder the expressions on her face.

Her attire had deteriorated as her father's estate fell to ruin, thanks to Jungkook availing Jimin's crafty ways of tricking money out of the hands of Y/N's gambling father who had gotten rather desperate for money. Jimin ran a gaming hell that had made many a gentleman penniless---something he took great pride in. According to Jimin, if they lost money to the gaming hell, it was a testament to their bad luck and his good luck.

Jungkook had decided to strip her of any remaining honor, not as though her mother had left his mother with any honor either-- even in her death. It would be comeuppance for what her mother had done. She would pay for her mother's sins. And so he thoroughly ruined her reputation, ensuring she would never have a good life therafter--a life lacking family and a chance at a socially and financially advantageous match.

That's when it hit Jungkook. Where was Y/N? She wasn't in her usual spot overlooking people dancing at her bench. That had been her occupation for the past 7 years, watching people have the life that she would never have--he had made it so.

Jungkook felt extremely uneasy now that he could not spot Y/N. Where the hell was she? She always came to the bigger events that Lady Alyssa and her daughter attended. He had denied her invitation to most smaller ,more intimate events with his social acumen, but not the big ones. She had to see what she was missing out on---life. That had been his revenge plan.

But now she was nowhere to be found. He blindly searched for her, till he came across Lady Alyssa and inquired in a drawling tone , schooling his features into a calm that he didn't mirror the panic he was actually feeling, "Hello, Lady Alyssa. Fine evening it is today, is it not"? Lady Alyssa graciously smiled at him, "Yes, of course it is Lord Jungkook. How are you faring today? Oh, this is my daughter Solji in case you have not met her". Solji gracefully curtsied in her periwinkle floaty dress that showed off her waifish frame in the best light.

He continued in an unaffected tone, "And where is your companion, Lady Solji? Y/N is it"? Solji nodded as she replied, "She has decided to retire to the countryside for a while. Her father left her a countryside residence and so she has chosen to depart early before the season ends so that she can celebrate Christmas over there". Lady Alyssa sighed, stating in a resigned tone, "Anyhow she has no prospects of marriage with how she looks and conducts herself, better she is away from polluting the rest of the ton with her incessant cynicism and gloom".

Jungkook nodded at these statements seeming calm as a cucumber on the outide, whereas he was internally rattled at the happenings imparted to him. She had left? After so many years, she had decided to just leave? Evidently she had gotten tired of not being enough for London. But how could she leave without telling him?Without even an announcement of her departure?

A little voice in Jungkook's head gave him the blatant answer--not like she had any friends to inform of her departure. And not like he was her husband/brother/legal guardian, who she would have to inform of her comings and goings. After his blasting statement 7 years ago, the few friends she did have, left her --frightened of being associated with her ill repute by merely even conversing with her, or being seen in her presence.

She was a free bird, and Jungkook was hating the fact.

She had left him to play his own game. The pyramid only remained so, when there were people at the bottom. Sure, there were others he could and had manipulated to stay at the bottom, but he wanted her to remain there. Not for her to exit the game altogether.

Y/N was not allowed to be happy or have a Christmas, after what his mother had been through---he would definitely ensure this.

#bts x plus size y/n #jungkook x y/n #historical romance #eventual smut #angst #comedy #duke jungkook #jungkook x chubby reader #body negativity #body shaming #plus size y/n #y/n x bts #chubby y/n x bts #jungkook x plus size y/n #bts x y/n

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starboybutler · 4 months

Text

Blue Christmas

summary: austin throws a christmas party while elvis is feeling fuzzy.

word count: 1.6k

warnings: age regression, pure fluff

notes: this is actually a bday gift for one of my mutuals!! @mooodyblue happy (early) birthday lily!!! hope u enjoy and have a happy birthday 🫶🏽

christmas was elvis’ favorite holiday.

a lot of people said christmas was their favorite, but elvis held it near and dear to his heart. he loved it all– the lights, the gifts, being with family, cooking food– all of it. it made him feel like he was a boy again, pestering his mama about whether or not they’d see santa in their small little armpit of a neighborhood. he’d always fall asleep though– and wake up to one or two presents underneath their small tree.

they were never big gifts, and that was fine, because just being there with his momma was enough for him.

elvis, despite his big and loud lifestyle, actually liked small, quiet christmases. he loved when it was him, and a handful of people that he held near and dear to his heart.

this year, however, austin had decided to throw a little christmas party. elvis was surprised by this, because austin was a pretty reserved person. he didn’t like crowds– they made him nervous– and he was a wallflower at parties. but he told elvis that it would be small– just a few friends and some family that were coming to visit him, and that they wouldn’t stay long at all. austin said he was allowed to invite some of his friends, but…

it didn’t matter. elvis would get through it fine. he was looking forward to spending one on one time with austin, but if there were a few people around, he could handle it. he was a little worried about them figuring out his identity, but austin said he had told them some lie about him being a friend that just looked a lot like elvis– or something like that. whatever.

the day of the party came– christmas eve– and elvis was able to greet everyone with a smile and a handshake, despite that fuzziness in the back of his head. there was austin’s older sister, ashley, and his close friend, also ashley– and his dad, and an aunt, and someone’s boyfriend– and a baby–

about ten people in total showed up. it wasn’t a ridiculous amount, but it was more than elvis was expecting. he saw austin shoot him a nervous look from the corner of his eye, before trying to get everyone settled in the living room. he heard mumbles of people telling him he had a nice place, or that he really did have a friend that looked like elvis.

after that, austin approached him, smiling softly.

“i know i said a few people–”

“it’s fine, aus.” elvis said, waving him off. “y’don’t gotta justify nothin’ to me. it’s your party. i’m fine.”

the blonde looked unsure, gently taking elvis’ hand in his. “y’sure? you don’t have to pretend to be alright with this– i know this isn’t what you were expecting, and–”

“it’s alrght,” elvis hums, rolling his shoulders. “i’ll jus’ try an’ sit back. observe.”

austin gave him a warm smile, caressing his knuckles with his thumb. “lemme know if y’need me at all, okay?”

elvis nodded, and trailed behind austin to the couch, waving meekly at everyone. they all began talking, gossiping about things elvis didn’t quite get and people he didn’t know. he felt so out of place, but he did his best to look like he was somewhat invested in the conversation.

as time went on, he zoned out. he couldn’t stay focused on anything– even if he tried. that fuzziness in his head tried to take over, but he was determined to let austin have a good time. he tried not to give into that feeling or those thoughts. he tried not to think about how nice it would be to get nice and comfortable in his favorite pajamas right now– or how he desperately wanted to watch cartoons while snuggled up in the blankets on the bed upstairs– or how he really wanted a pb and j and some milk.

“...e? e? what about you?”

“huh?” elvis hummed, snapping out of his thoughts abruptly. “what about me?”

“you enjoyin’ the party? y’seem a little in your head.”

it was austin asking, but the whole room was staring at him, waiting for an answer. that didn’t help the tiny feeling in his brain as he scrambled to answer, the words seeming to get stuck in his throat. “i–”

he stuttered something awful, his cheeks flushing as he began to fidget with the sleeves of his sweater. “i-i– yeah, i’m…it’s fun. f-fun.”

the room accepts his response, but austin furrows his brows in worry as he gently grabs elvis’ hand.

“uh– we’ll be right back.”

austin pulled him up, leading him into the kitchen gently. elvis felt dazed and small and stupid for stuttering like that, in front of all those people, but all of that melted away when austin’s thumb gently brushed against his cheek.

“hey now,” the blonde crooned, his eyes gently glimmering with all of the pretty colors of their christmas lights. “whatsa matter, huh? you look all sad.”

elvis swallowed hard, wanting so badly to lie and try to spare austin’s feelings– but the more he thought about going back out there in his dumb sweater and uncomfortable pants, the more he cracked and just sniffled, overstimulated.

“i hate it, momma.” elvis whimpered, eyes watering with unshed tears. “too many people– ‘s all loud and hot and this sweater is itchy– i jus’ wanna snuggle with you and watch cartoons.”

“oh, baby,” austin frowned, taking elvis’ hands in his and caressing his knuckles. “why didn’t you say nothin’? i told you i was right there if ya needed anything.”

elvis sniffled softly, his cheeks flushing as he murmured quietly. “wanted you to have fun, momma. d-didn’t want you t’worry ‘bout me.”

“baby.” austin sighs, pulling him in for a tight hug, immediately making him melt into the warm crook of his neck, sniffling softly as the blonde rubs soothing circles into his back. “i’m your caregiver, i’m supposed to worry about you. you’re my little prince, and i’m your momma. i would do anything for you. you got that?”

“b-b-but–”

“no buts,” austin hushes, running his fingers through elvis’ soft locks. “how about this– you go upstairs ‘n get comfy, and i’ll be up there in a few minutes, okay?”

“okey,” he sniffed, pulling away from austin reluctantly and walking towards the stairs, hearing austin reassure the group of people behind him that he was perfectly fine.

he reached the bedroom and sat on the bed, fidgeting with his fingers as he waited for austin to show up. he heard their voices down there– faint and mumbly, and then a door closing.

the room to the door opened, and austin smiled at him softly.

“hi baby.”

“hi momma.” elvis muttered, rocking back and forth idly. “where’d everyone go?” he asked, noticing the lack of mumbling from downstairs.

“i sent ‘em home.”

“wha– why?” elvis whined, a little embarrassed. “y-y’didn’t have to– i-i didn’t mean f-for you to end the whole thing!”

“it’s not a big deal.” he said. shrugging. “besides, i was gettin’ a little tired too. and i missed my baby.” he hummed, pressing a noisy kiss to elvis’ cheek.

elvis whined, his face flushing as austin’s plush lips met his cheek. “momma!”

“sorry, sorry, i know how you are about kisses.” he hums, sitting next to him. “you ready to watch a movie?”

“r-really? wh-which movie?”

“any movie you want.”

“o-oh, uh…c-can we watch the grinch?” elvis asked eagerly, practically bouncing as he looked up at austin with eyes that were practically glowing.

“of course. let’s get your pjs on first.” he hummed, taking elvis’ hand and standing him up, letting him look at his options in the drawer before him. “pick a pair.”

“oooh….uhm, i want the pink ones!” he decided, his thumb making its way between his lips as he spoke. “the ones with the yellow stars,”

“okay prince.” austin hummed, before tsking and pulling elvis’ finger away from his mouth. “nuh uh. we don’t bite our fingers. you want your paci?”

elvis blushed, but nodded shyly. “uh huh.”

austin handed him his favorite pacifier, a baby blue one with little stars scattered all over it, making elvis smile as he took it into his mouth and began suckling idly. austin smiled and ruffled his hair, getting out the pajama set elvis had chosen.

austin sat him down and undressed him gently, poking him in his stomach teasingly every few seconds, making elvis pout and whine. once his shirt was buttoned and his pants were on, austin kneeled in front of him and looked him over once, before sneaking a kiss on top of his pacifier.

elvis went red, but didn’t whine. he just looked away, embarrassed as austin giggled at his expression.

“okay baby, let’s put the movie on. you ready to snuggle with momma?”

elvis nodded, crawling in the bed and snuggling into his usual spot, pulling the blankets to his chin. austin smiles fondly, making sure to grab elvis’ stuffed bear before he crawled into bed next to him. elvis eagerly grabbed his stuffie and snuggled it close to his chest, scooching closer to austin as he settled down next to him, turning the tv on.

it was quiet as austin put the movie on, save for the steady sound of elvis’ breathing. he snuggled into austin’s side as the movie began to play, giggling and smiling at the jokes and such.

not even halfway through the movie, he was fast asleep, his gentle snores filling the room as he subconsciously tried to press closer to austin, hugging his tiny stuffed bear to his chest like his life depended on it. austin couldn’t help but smile down at him, admiring how peaceful he looked as he slept. it warmed his heart seeing him rest– especially since he didn’t get good sleep often. the fact he felt safe and secure enough to sleep in his arms made him proud.

austin turned the tv off, pulling elvis’ head closer to his chest as he settled into the covers himself.

“goodnight, little prince.”

#elvis x reader #elvis x y/n #austin!elvis x y/n #elvis

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rassvetsky · 1 year

Note

Drunk bob gets the very obvious rosy glow and vehemently declares to everyone that he’s not drunk

you. you have awakened the need of dropkicking bob in me. so i decided to elaborate a tiny bit in my half-asleep state! absolute light of my life ilysm

You should've seen it.

Actually, you know what? There's no way this could be on you. Because everyone was well aware that Robert just can't hold his liquor, and you were pretty sure that those glasses of G&T didn't magically find its way into Bob's hands. Jake and Javy might take pride in their not-a-feeling-behind-these-eyes expressions but the shit-eating grin on their lips told you exactly what you needed to know.

But you couldn't blame them if you tried. While sober Bob, the pretty wallflower who only speaks when spoken to —or when someone disrespects a woman, he's cool like that— is fun enough to be around; drunk Bob is a whole other experience. Drunk Bob is a state of mind, if you think about it. There's only so much you can experience in this world, and witnessing drunk Bob is one of the experiences in which—

"Who?! WHO?!"

Drunk Bob is also pretty loud, yeah.

"You, dude. You. You're drunk as hell."

"What? That's such bullshit." he slurred, somehow a bit hyper, and if that wasn't a clear enough indicator of his mental state, the rosy glow on his cheeks definitely gave it all away. "The audacity! Accusing me of— wow. Just wow, Mickey. And I thought you and I were friends or somethin'."

"We are friends—"

"Only a true friend would be that truly honest!"

"Did you just quote Shrek? That makes no sense—"

But Robert ignored his protest, deciding instead to take a seat somewhere —which in this case happened to be right between you and Natasha, on the already not-so-spacious couch— with his arms folded across his chest and an absolutely adorable pout on his lips.

He looked so cute, you wanted to smack him across the face with a tray. Natasha didn't seem to like him all that much at that moment, though.

Out of instinct or whatever the hell that was, you reached out to squish his cheeks together with your hand while he was staring at a small crack on the wall— wondering if that should be a concern. Why would a wall crack by itself, anyway? He melted right against your palm nevertheless, a huff leaving his lips before he lowered himself a bit to be able to rest his head against your shoulder. "Aw, did Fanboy upset you, baby?"

"I'm not drunk."

"Yes you are," you chuckled, wrapping both of your arms around him this time when he shrugged and pouted a bit more. "Look at you. All rosy."

"You're rosy, shut up." he shook his head to both sides, half-heartedly trying to peel your arms off of him but pulling them close whenever he felt like you were going to actually pull away. "You're all really, really stupid. Just throwin' accusations around. And I'm even stupider because I love you all so much."

#bob #he's so ARRRGHHFGDFJJJJ #hello?? HELLO???#JDKSJFSKF i really wanna slap him. affectionately #silly little dude #robert floyd #robert floyd #robert floyd x reader #bob floyd x reader #top gun maverick

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bohemian-nights · 2 months

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Once more I’m quite unsure as to why everyone feels the need to ignore the source material. Season 3 not being about Benophie still boggles my mind because why???!??!! Not to be a hater but Colin is uninteresting and unattractive (no hate to the actor he’s just not my type) to me. And I personally can’t stand Penelope (once again no hate to the actress) so I’m not really interested in this season tbh. On a side note there is a possibility to make Sophie a illegitimate granddaughter of Charlotte especially since in Queen Charlotte she says along the lines of how there are 50 illegitimate grand babies that [she] the crown ignores.

I know what you mean anon. Nothing against either of the actors playing the characters or the fans who like the ship, but Polin just isn't my cup of tea.

We all have our faves and mine is Benophie. I’m a Benophie and then a Franchael girl through and through.

That being said, despite me being a Benophie girl I don’t mind that they’ve skipped over Benedict. I mean I was initially pissed the hell off about it, but I think I understand now why Shonda did what she did.

This is gonna sound nonsensical, and weird, and is probably going to piss someone off(lol I’m the queen of that apparently👑), but there have been back to back to back interracial couples in Bridgerton.

I’m almost positive Sophie is going to be Black(🤞🏽) and while this show prides itself on diversity, I think they wanted to give white audiences a bone. So for that reason, she chose to push Polin’s season ahead.

Plus I think Shonda sees herself in Penelope(writer, “working woman,” the wallflower, and hater of other women💀).

I’m kinda glad she did push Polin’s season forward given what happened with the strike situation…

I do not mind waiting another two years for Benophie. I’ll “suffer” through this season for them and who knows, this season may surprise me and I may end up loving it 🤷🏽‍♀️

Now regarding, Sophie’s parentage, it would be interesting if they made her an illegitimate grandkid of Queen Charlotte and see how she has to deal with that. How the queen interacts with her, as well as the rest of the ton.

(I don’t think that in this scenario her being a bastard would be hidden or not common knowledge).

I know some people aren’t too fond of Sophie being Black🙃 a maid while Benedict is who is.

Her being QC's illegitimate granddaughter would be a way to kinda pivot from her being a maid while keeping the fact that she’s a bastard without a proper place in society.

I feel like the former is less important than her being the latter. She’s more than just her employment.

Sophie has to deal with the fact that she was robbed of a proper childhood, protection, financial security, love, and a sense of belonging. Yet she still manages to be a kind considerate human being with staunch morals and principles.

(I love girls who’ve been through so much, but still manage to survive and thrive. I blame Jane Eyre).

As long as Shonda tackles those issues and we see Benedict falling head over heels for her(even when he thinks he’s fallen for two different women🤣)I’m good with whatever happens.

The show has already made a lot of changes to the book. Some good some bad, but making Sophie one of many bastard grandchildren of the crown makes the most sense and has the potential to be the most interesting(for me at least).

#bnasks #bnask #bridgerton asks #benophie #sophie beckett #benedict bridgerton

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rachalixie · 2 years

Text

bandaids don’t fix bulletholes

sometimes your possessiveness over jisung rears it’s head at the worst moments

warnings: jisung x gender neutral reader

genre: angst, fluff

word count: 700+

of all the people you know, the title of social butterfly has to go to jisung.

of course, his anxiety often stops him from expressing his desire to make everyone around him laugh, and around crowds and new people he melts into a wallflower.

but around his friends? around the people he knows and trusts? he flits around from person to person like a bee collecting pollen. or like he’s playing a video game and collecting xp points from interacting with side characters. he would probably like the second analogy better.

it really doesn’t help, then, that you’re a naturally possessive person. you want to collect every one of jisung’s laughs and put them in a jar to open up on rainy days. you want to seal up his toothy grins in wax sealed envelopes to read when he’s away from you. you want those laughs and smiles to be yours. it should not be minho making jisung laugh, it should be you.

better yet, it shouldn’t be felix perching himself on jisung’s lap and tickling the hairs at the nape of his neck with his slender fingers. it shouldn’t be seungmin playfully barking at him from across the room.

and what makes this all the more ridiculous is that you’re in your apartment. the one you share with jisung. you’re hosting your friends for your own anniversary dinner and you can’t help but be jealous that your boyfriend of one year is giving other people his attention.

you do truly love jisung’s friends, you’ve known them long enough now for you them to consider them your family. they welcomed you into their group with wide smiles and open arms. but you can’t help but want these pieces of jisung to keep for yourself, to know that there are parts of him that only you’ve seen. you want to feel special to him, which is a ridiculous notion because you know how special you are to him. he tells you this on a daily basis. hell, he even wrote a song about it.

and most days, you’re not bothered. most days, you join in, not afraid to be affectionate with your friends and with him. most days you’re right there on laps and in hugs until you’re all in a pile on the floor not knowing which limbs belong to which person.

and then there’s rare days like these where he’s giving away cuddles and kisses and bad jokes and funny faces like they’re free and you feel your heart dry up around the corners because those should be yours and yours only. rare days where you’re faking smiles and inhabiting corners and dodging questions.

when everyone leaves at the end of the night you’re left standing alone, sullen and looking at the mess in your living room. he flits to you after closing and locking the front door, ever attentive.

“jagi, what’s wrong?” he says, his brow furrowed and his lips pursed making him look unfairly adorable. “you haven’t been yourself all evening.” the ash colored, shriveled part of your heart unfurls a little bit as you press your forehead to his, breathing him in.

“nothing’s wrong, baby,” you say, closing your eyes. “just not feeling very well. i think i’m coming down with something.” you lie, feeling bad but knowing that the truth would hurt him and you don’t think you could handle both of you being hurt right now.

“oh! i’ll make sure we have your tea stocked and that chocolate you like tomorrow, okay? let’s have a lazy day,” he says, rubbing his nose against yours briefly before taking your hand in his and leading you to your shared bedroom. his sweetness only makes you feel worse, but you’re nothing if not stubborn.

because you know that if you tell him then he would stop, that he would be less affectionate with his friends and be glued to you all evening just like you want and that would break your heart. it would kill you to have him all to yourself because you know the shining light inside of him would dim and he would do it willingly and it would be your fault. you would rather live in pitiful jealousy your entire life than see that happen.

he would do anything for you, and you’re going to try your hardest to do this for him.

—

masterlist

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queenofinys · 11 months

Text

happy two years of ginger and gestures of goodwill go forth let go of sorrow and sadness and spite i'm somebody taller tonight and everything went as it should yeah in my neck of the wood & you found mе out oh, don't you know you're my whole house & my summer of summer of pain buckets and bullets of rain falling asleep in a hospital waiting room instead of holding it over my head baby, you held me instead & got a secondary, secondary chance so i'm taking my love to the dance and all of my demons are wallflowers watching us but darling i pay them no mind & and honey, i'm finding that ghosts are just kids in paint i'm scared but I'm never alone and i'd swim to your call on my phone & and everything's looking so good yeah in my neck of the woods & i think it's all gonna work out and i thought that yesterday and when i was sixteen and both of those times it didn't & don't need a blood moon or a horoscope to tell me that this time will be different & a little drop of honey and the picture's clearing up cup of coffee spilling over cleaning all my cuts & a pessimist by nature but in you baby i trust oh everything's coming up milhouse & i think it's gonna be good news cause you deserve it and we're somewhat decent people or at least trying to be & the world is awful and the ice caps they are melting but today you bought me flowers so i'm choosing to believe & the future is a wishing well and i'm gonna invest throw a couple of pounds in oh lying on your chest & sorry it's strange that i'm crying think it's because you're the one & but a little drop of honey and a little glass of rain babe you'll be surprised how much a girl can change & i know it's not how you planned it but that's not the worst thing in the world i know that you're scared cause you think i'll let you down again & i want you to want me when you're dead to roll in your grave like we're not done yet to call off the whole damn funeral cause our love is so damn beautiful & i want you to know that the past is past that everything changed when i heard you laugh cause you sitting there with your headphones in you were the point of all this living & i'm sure that you're right and i can't blame you for things you haven't done yеt even if I'm scared you will & and i think a lot about may about meeting you that day i was late and a sеrial blusher never made it to the second date & i want you to want me despite all that to live every day like the plane might crash to chase every satellite and star i'd pin all of my hopes to your handlebars & the truth is i'd be such a jealous ghost i'd scrub all your lovers' names out the stone & your heart was full of boys and brimstones yours was full of girls who lied both got hurt by other people both found each other, baby right in time & i don't need to live forever just not one day longer than you & babe without me you are just so defenseless from motorbikes and girls who might try break your heart so i’m pretty sure that i should make you breakfast and then i should never leave the front seat of your car & you are important, so of course it maddens me when you're nonchalant about your own mortality please be more careful when you cross the road you're a perfect arrangement of rickety bones & so forgive me if i hover close i'm a helicopter cause i love you so oh bear with me darling you should know i’m a helicopter cause i love you so & it's not interfering if you can't be trusted to treasure that heart like i do your sense of danger is antique and rusted and mine's laser sharp oh when it comes to you & when you wait for a train don't cross the yellow line don't run with scissors and don't text and drive call me the minute you get to your dad's i'll be worried all night and i won't wanna ask & build a timber frame for future time's sake we've had a lot of rain lucky i'm an english rose & now interlaced for worse or for better my bird of a feather there are good things coming for you & this could be your happy hunting ground everything you wanted well you got it now so don't take it for granted i love you don't take advantage & everything we dreamed of is falling out the clouds so careful where your boots tread oh protect the love that you get & and we got way too much to lose here, don't you think so it’s too good just to let it slip on by without a pause & we've been stacking up the boxes trying to reach for what we wanted don't look down i know it was worth the cost & trying i’m not there but i’m trying and honestly sometimes i think you want too much & i’m not a movie hero just a guy you say you love lying you say it's fine you're lying but how am I supposed to know that i can't read that stuff & when did i wake up and find out trying isn't good enough & oh i don't wanna tell you i’m leaving and i won't if you give me an inch i want you to change cause you want to change i know i tried can you say you did & trying doesn't mean you're changing doesn't mean the whole thing's getting fixed just means you want it to & trying doesn't make you perfеct really it's the minimum you do for those you love & and i hate you right now and god i hate that you're the love of my life but this ain't no way to live & i don't know how to be what you want from me and i have a feeling soon you won't be wanting me & i know i’m a piece of work but i wanna make it work with you do the dishes with nebraska in the background & ankles in your lap heart in your hand how i got you honey even i don't understand but i'm happy that we're here at the end of the year under winter skies & you and i are the last to leave the party swaying under halogen lights i'll take your chaos and your crooked in a heartbeat heart beats louder i’m gonna make you proud of me & you're my favorite comic my jupiter comet people ask how long have i loved you no comment probably since i was seven and you were eight we didn't know each other but baby it was fate & now we're in a freak storm every other weekend your friends think i'm bad news and a part of you believes them i understand i know how lucky i am & water rings from cheap red wine you're the only apple in my eye and my dress is from a funeral & you mouthed babe you look beautiful fom across the room grin in your eyes and i tell the group look that's my guy and i think we'll be alright i do & i think we got this in a wedding dress and a casio watch this year's a plot twist cause i'm not the sort to be certain a lot & ran for the trenches and there you were humming strawberry fields no more defenses no more defenses & you are better than you know yourself i found you off the highest shelf i'll always feel the way i felt & sat in a pub on the heath first kiss first friday in june you asked what I'd tell my friends said it's a glowing review & baby nothing much has changed i guess your buzzcut it grew but i'm still the girl with the blush, giving a glowing review & we'll make a home on the cracks we'll tell nothing but the truth and for the rest of my life you'll get a glowing review & maybe it's perfect maybe it's incredibly flawed it doesn't matter i'm happy honey i’m locking the doo this is our shelter birthdays are nailed to the fridge what did i tell you & blood moon skylarks my baby's out the ball park nice teeth wide heart i'll never need a hall pass eyes won't wander it's my honor & all my future rested on you stairwell hideouts smiling with your eyebrows life without you i never wanna find out & you're scared me too i won't leave you & i know something that you don't know scathing down the landline i still kind of love you & i'm four steps forward in my plimsolls but i still wanna stab any girl that wants to touch you & church bells ringing for a fresh start but you had a head start always such an athlete and no one wants to kiss a bad sport so i keep my head high wave at all your family & i knew you until you were someone else and i don't know if you ever knew yourself & i guess we just weren't meant to be in love forever and i guess people just change you got good i got better but i still care about you and i think i'll care forevеr & and i'm glad we got to do all those perfеct ugly almost priceless lost and lovely lunar years together & i know something that you don't know these days all our friends think you're kind of an arsehole and i've been cleaning up my sad act incense in the hallways burning through the charcoal & london's pretty in the autumn and i'm a nicer person now i'm not your person, funny how that works and funny that we're working now

#maya.txt #maisie peters #trying

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mango-jpeg · 2 months

Text

st elmo's fire and drop the knife notes

(i wasn't sure at first if i would make these posts again this year (like.. get a new bit bro) but ultimately i do think they're helpful for me so i'll stick w it for now)

i don’t remember much about persona 3 from playing it 15 years ago. basically all i remember is 1) being obsessed with akihiko 2) sobbing like a baby when i finished it @ 2 am 3) the crackly, fuzzy quality of my old tube tv

anyway i also don't remember writing much of st elmo's fire bc i was so inside it the whole time. i did think more about structure for both fics, i think that's something i'm going to focus on more this year

sidenote: i read chuck palahniuk's consider this in jan which was a great read on its own and also gave me lots to think about re: writing, and influenced me/my thinking for both of these fics

additional sidenote: coming to terms w the fact that the style of writing i enjoy most + would like to imitate works best in first person but i do not want to write or read first person fanfiction

for the first time i wrote drafts/outlines of almost every scene in my notes app then wrote them out fully in docs, which it turns out is a good way to do things

past tense? again?? who am i.

st elmo’s fire wrote from feb 6-7? to feb 25

this is maybe the most for me and only me thing i’ve written. i’ve wanted to write an awkward morning after pill scene for so long

looked up their personas bc i was curious about their mythology and obviously seized on the st elmo’s fire thing

(i thought it'd be cool to include a bit of magic in a fic that otherwise ignores all the canon magic)

this fic was my way of reaching back thru time to my horrible teenage self + saying you’re gonna be ok kid

reading:

I Have Some Questions for You, Rebecca Makkai

Me Talk Pretty One Day, David Sedaris

Heartburn, Nora Ephron

listening: st elmo’s fire (approx 40 times a day), hold it in

fav early bit i wrote: the whole paragraph about shinji’s boobs a fav late addition:

Inside the air was dry and charged; Akihiko was sure if he touched Shinji he’d spark. He felt the kind of calm certainty he usually felt only before matches, when he knew the result would be in his favour.

drop the knife wrote from feb 21 to mar 10

i have sequel disease. once i've written the long 'figuring out the characters' fic i neeeed to write another one. i think it's getting worse actually, i think i might have trilogy disease (write one long standalone and immediately want to write 2 related works)

the kind of cooking i do is soup. if i had things my way this is the only food we'd eat. this made writing the recipes a huge pain in the ass bc i do not think shinji is a 'throw everything into a pot and let it figure itself out' kind of cook

took the key lime pie recipe straight out of the last chapter of heartburn. idk if this is really the ‘right’ dessert but it’s the kind of food i’d actually make and i wanted to include one heartburn recipe

i thought writing aki instead of akihiko for the whole fic would be annoying and then switching between the two became a way of reflecting shinji's attempt at putting distance between them ie. thinks 'aki' in the abstract, and when his guard is low. idk how much that comes thru in reading but i made the attempt

reading:

Heartburn, Nora Ephron (i reread chapters for 3 weeks. i loved everything about this book. i’m codependent on it now.)

Wallflower at the Orgy, Nora Ephron

Tokyo Ueno Station, Yu Miri

Slaughterhouse Five, Kurt Vonnegut

listening: sore, knife, i got heaven

fav early bit:

Aki looked at him. He was within arm’s reach and his face was soft in a way it rarely was, his eyes large in the dark. Shinjiro wanted him in ways he’d given up on long ago, wanted him bloody and beneath him, wanted him laughing and leaning in to close the distance.

late addition:

Aki was like one of those dogs bred to rip prey out of their burrows or drag sleds across the tundra; being forced to stay inside was torturous, he needed something he could sink his teeth into.

took me ages to come up with a title, i didn’t even have a working one. found the poem oxygen when i went searching and i liked the phrase drop the knife bc knives are used in cooking (lol) + implies being disarmed + the poem has the sort of half of my soul vibe these guys have goin on

#writing journal

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callmemana · 1 year

Text

Arms Wide Open, Catch Me If I Fall: Meet Jade ‘Whiskey’ Kerner

Mrs. Jade ‘Whiskey’ Kerner ( @mrsjaderogers )can be described in one word: badass. She could also be described as funny, friendly, nurturer, giving, stubborn, kind, and so many more adjectives. She’s a pilot that gives her all on every run and excels in every way possible. That’s how she won the heart of Top Gun’s very own Ron ‘Slider’ Kerner.

In the year 1986, a female pilot wasn’t heard of. They were nearly never asked to Top Gun, but two female pilots had gone. Whiskey & Dragon had become quiet close friends while in the presence of the men. After the first couple of days, those two were known around the base as ‘Chaos Crew’ always getting in trouble for something, sometimes small, most of the time big. But I guess that’s why Iceman & Slider fell in love with these chaotic best friends, they could always bring laughter wherever they went.

After the mission that led to Maverick saving everyone’s asses, Ron took Whiskey on a date. He saw his life flash before his eyes, and just knew that he wanted to live what time he has in this type of work with her. They ended up enjoying themselves and went on a second, third, and so many more dates before he proposed.

As the couple got older they had kids and watched them grow up. They also saw newer pilots at Top Gun, and Whiskey with a reluctant Slider, would take them under their wings and adopt them. First it was Rooster, then Bob, Lucky, and when they first met her, Birdie. Whiskey literally showed up to the Hard Deck with official documents the next day after finding out that’s where they all hung out. When Birdie first saw her, she thought Whiskey was joking, but as she read over the documents she quickly realized Whiskey was serious. The newest family member was then caught in a big group bear hug.

After Lucky & Fanboy’s wedding it all seemed alright for the group, until a couple of months later when Bob started to pull back from the squad. He was known to be a wallflower, but through that time he had become more himself, out of his shell. So, Whiskey & Dragon took it upon themselves to pressure they boys about asking Bob about his backtracking. As it turns out, Bob had a girl back in Lemoore! Most of the group was surprised by this, he seemed more of the type of guy too shy of talking to girls. After some questioning, they got some basic information about her.

Whiskey and Dragon were the main meddlers when trying to get Birdie orders to San Diego to join the Dagger Squad. As wives of high ranking officers, with a little sweet talking and threats, their men saw that the only way to please their wives were to bring ‘Birdie’ to them. After they were successful with getting her here, they needed more man power, so they brought on the other members; Phoenix, Lucky, Rooster, Fanboy, Payback, Hangman, Coyote, and Halo, to name a few.

After Birdie arrived and settled in, the meddlers took action. She was rooming with Halo and Phoenix while in San Diego and the girls asked questions and tried to get to know her better before relaying all the info to Whiskey & Dragon to help get the two idiots back together. Whiskey wanted to see her babies happy, and could see that Bob & Birdie were happy together once, Hell the whole squad could see it. They just had to meddle a little more.

Forever 🏷️ list: @bayisdying @mrsjaderogers @dragon-kazansky @sweetlittlegingy @switchbladedreamz

🏷️ list: @luckyladycreator2

#birdslibrary #meet the characters #jade whiskey kerner #not my oc #slider x whiskey #fluff #top gun maverick #Arms Wide Open Catch Me If I Fall series

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sk1ttery · 10 months

Note

TeLL about Hotshot in the wallflower au plz ;)

CW for mentions of unhealthy relationships.

I warned y’all this AU is a highschool AU with angst and some heavy shit.

Shot is going THROUGH it.

So most of the Wallflower AU characters are around 18, cause senior year. But my friend and I sort of decided that some are a little younger, so 16-17. (Some even younger like Boots and Les)

Spot is one of the younger ones; he and Racer are both 17. This is because I find if really funny that a scrawny little 17 year old is the leader of one of the scariest gangs of teenagers in Brooklyn.

THAT and his right hand is Hot-Shot, this 6’4, dangerously calm tree of a man.

The Brooklyn Bunch are essentially a gang of bikers who came together to protect each other because they live in such a rough area and most if not all grew up on the streets or in extremely unhealthy situations.

Hot-Shot is essentially the dad of the Brooklyn Bunch. Despite his scary looking exterior, Hot-Shot is possibly one of the sweetest people you’ll meet when you get to know him. He’s compassionate, caring and fiercely loyal. He’s ride or die for almost all the Brooklyn bunch and the Hattan bunch when they eventually meet.

He grew up with his parents who were criminals and constantly dragging him into their bullshit. From a young age he had to cover for them and hide their crimes and because of this he became a scarily good actor.

He’d often get picked up by the police but his parents would always bail him out. Until one day, when he was sixteen, they didn’t. So he ran.

He went back to his parents’ apartment and found Ten-Pin there (the child of people who worked for his parents. Who was only a baby). He figured a kid didn’t deserve to live in that situation, so he took Ten-Pin and ran.

He went to Graves (I could also talk about Graves for hours ☹️) and stayed with him for a while till he got back on his feet and got his own place with Myron and their (new) kid Ten-Pin. Myron and Hot-Shot didn’t end up dating untill WAY later, as Hot-Shot for about two years was stuck in a very unhealthy relationship.

Because of everything he went through, he decided he wanted to protect the Brooklyn Bunch, so he made himself a safe person for them. Their parental figure. Someone they could turn to if needed. Because it was something he never had.

Some Random Facts About Hot-Shot in this AU?

He has a pet chinchilla named Rio.

He’s deaf in one ear.

He has OCD.

He’s an insomniac.

His favourite TV show is Chuck.

He works at an Ice-Cream Parlor named ‘Angel’s’, and has to wear one of those silly little uniforms and the others come into his workplace to mock him. (He also works at a currently unnamed boba place and a bar called Jenny’s)

He loves music and plays guitar and ukulele.

He’s a really good cook.

He tends to carpool for the Brooklyn Bunch despite a lot of them being able to drive themselves.

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mariesakamari · 10 months

Text

Chapter 3: Trial and Error

Masterlist

3rd POV…

“Yuu, are you paying attention,” Yuu’s math teacher asked. Yuu was currently looking out the window having a weird feeling in their gut.

“Yes, I am paying attention,” Yuu responded, turning their attention back to the front of the class. The teacher nodded their head at Yuu and continued on with the lesson.

“Hey, you alright,” Yuu’s friend had whispered to Yuu, slightly leaning over the aisle.

“I have this weird feeling,” Yuu whispered back, turning to look bak out the window. Their attention was brought to a cherry blossom tree that was slightly apart from the others. As Yuu focused more on the tree, the more their friend worried about them. The tree had turned colors and lighting appeared to strike in front of it despite not having any clouds in the sky. Yuu shook their head and went to focus on the rest of the lesson. Yuu had fallen behind in school while being stuck in Twisted Wonderland, and now they have to try their hardest to catch up to everyone else. Yuu was grateful for their friends that shared the same classes with, the group study sessions have helped a lot.

“...And they were really spacey during math class…” Yuu snapped out of their thoughts and saw that they were sitting at a cafeteria table with their friends.

“Welcome back to the land of the living,” one of the friends greeted.

“Sorry, I was just really out of it,” Yuu apologized.

“See, this is why I said you shouldn’t have come back to school after just getting out of the hospital,” Yuu’s male childhood friend sighed. He’d been taking care of Yuu and watching them since they were cleared to leave the hospital.

“Takeda, I’m fine,” Yuu assured, but they could tell that he wasn’t buying it.

“Henchman, you need to eat some food,” Grim stated with food in his mouth. The hospital had made Grim Yuu’s ‘emotional support animal’ so he was allowed to be with them at all times. Grim got along great with the friend group and tried to keep his destruction down to the minimum.

“Yeah, some food might help,” Yuu agreed and began to eat the food they had gotten.

……

“Good morning, everyone,” Akari called out from outside the sleeping quarters. “Are any of you up? Quite some lighting last night, wasn't it?”

“Why is she so loud,” Leona groaned, barely waking up.

“We have to get up Leona-san,” Epel said. “We have the trial to prove that we can stay here.”

“He’s right,” Silver agreed. “We wouldn’t want to be late.”

“Never thought that you would be awake, Silver,” Leona dryly chuckled as he sat up and yawned.

“I wanted to make a good impression,” Silver explains. “Also I was taking a walk around the village just to get a proper look at it.”

“I hope you are all awake,” Vil pounded on the outside of the door.

“We are all up, Vil-san”, Epel replied. Leona had gotten up and put on his clothes from the day before since no one in the group had any clothes except for the ones they showed up in. Leona’s group was the last to make it out of the sleeping quarters.

Akari gave them a nice smile when she saw them exit the building, “What lovely weather we’ve got!” She turned her attention to everyone, “I hope you all had a nice sleep, even if this land is strange and new to you.”

“I slept like a baby,” Lilia commented and Kalim laughed.

“Let’s get to headquarters,” Akari suggests. “Captain Cyllene is waiting, then after we can go to The Wallflower for breakfast before the trial.”

“Yes, let’s get this over with,” Idia sighed, not wanting to be outside. The group followed Akari to a large fainted orange building. The building was two stories tall with some scaffolding alongside the building, as it was being worked on by some of the villagers. Inside the building, the flooring was a red carpet with the village's logo in the center of the lobby area.

“The Survey Corps’ offices are here on the first fl⎼” Akari introduction to the building was interrupted.

“Don’t give up! Keep those eyes open,” the voice that interrupted exclaimed.

“The wild Pokemon, they…” another voice could be faintly heard. “They were everywhere. Attacking from all sides… I sent out my partner Pokemon, but… against a whole pack… Outnumbered…”

“This is what happens when you go so far afield,” the first voice scolded. “But the Medical Corps will put you to rights.”

“That man’s with the Security Corps… and even with his own partner, he took a beating from wild Pokemon,” Akari explained. “Without a partner Pokemon of your own, you might find this trial…particularly trying.”

“So those little guys from yesterday are that dangerous,” Floyd questioned.

“Maybe, but we don’t exactly know for sure,” Jamil responded. “Maybe it depends on the type of Pokemon.”

“Captain Cyllene,” Akari called out as she moved across the lobby to the open office. “The group is here.”

“You may enter,” Cyllene says as she looks up from her paperwork. Her desk is covered with various books, and rolled sheets of paper. Akari and the group enter the room and Cyllene gets up from her chair to walk around to the front of the desk. “Let us get straight to it. If you wish to join the Galaxy Expedition Team, prove yourself capable by going out into the Obsidian Fieldlands and catching three different species of Pokemon: Bidoof, Starly, and Shinx.”

“Catching three Pokemon from the start,” Akari’s jaw drops. “No one in the Galaxy Team has ever managed that…”

“Did these strangers not catch three different Pokemon only yesterday,” Cyllene countered. “My trial should be simple enough for them⎼if the professor wasn’t exaggerating things, that is.”

“He didn’t exaggerate anything, Captain,” Deuce defended the professor, but Cyllene ignored him.

“The Galaxy Team does not have the means to provide for those who only take without giving,” Cyllene continued. “If you wish to stay, you must prove beyond any doubt that you’ll be an asset to our cause. I will lend you some Survey Corps satchels to carry whatever you may need in the field.” She then passed out satchels that the group had put on.

“That satchel doesn’t exactly match your, er, mode of dress…” Akari observed.

“Well obviously,” Vil mocked. “These uniforms shouldn’t be matched with something so plain.”

Akari,” Cyllene got Akari’s attention. “I’ll expect you to step in if anything goes awry.” Akari nodded her head in understanding.

“Pardon the intrusion,” Laventon entered the office. “New friends, come with me for a moment!” The group and Akari followed Laventon out to the lobby. “Now then, a jolley good morning to everyone!”

“Can we get on with this,” Leona grumbled.

“We need all the information we can get,” Ruggie sighed. “Just suck it up for now.”

“Is something the matter, Professor Laventon,” Akari questioned.

“In order to complete our Pokedex and, well, simply survive in this unforgiving land…” Laventon started to explain. “These guys absolutely must pass this trial! And as a professor of Pokemon, I’ve got just the ticket to help accomplish that!” Laventon tosses up three PokeBalls and the Pokemon the group had previously caught came out of the PokeBalls, “I am gifting you these three Pokemon to help your chances of success during the trial skyrocket.”

“That’s awfully nice of you,” Kalim smiled. The Pokemon looked at the group, recognizing them from yesterday and went towards the three people who caught them. Rowlet flew up and landed on Rook’s shoulder, Oshawott walked up to Azul, and Cyndaquil ran up to Silver.

“I’ve never seen Pokemon react that way to seeing people,” Akari gasped. She had slightly stepped back from the group.

“I truly have great faith in you all,” Laventon praised. “With a Pokemon partner of your own, you’ll be able to fight off wild Pokemon outside the village! You are also able to give the Pokemon nicknames.”

“Nicknames, huh,” Silver muttered, looking down at the Cyndaquil at his feet.

“Let’s focus on the trial first before nicknaming any Pokemon,” Riddle suggested.

“A word of advice, new friends⎼,” Laventon paused slightly. “Pay close attention to which PokeBalls are empty and which ones contain a Pokemon when you’re out in the field! By the way, what species has Captain Cyllene charged you with catching?”

“A Bidoof, Starly, and Shinx,” Kalim cheerfully answered.

“Well, that’s smashing! All three of those species can be found in the Obsidian Fieldlands,” Laventon smiled. “Let me give you some PokeBalls to use during your trial, then.” Laventon handed Kalim 20 PokeBalls. “These PokeBalls may be handcrafted, but they work great, as you’ve already seen!”

“I guess you’re all finally ready,” Akari inserted herself back into the conversation. “You’ll have to leave the village for the trial. Turn left after you exit headquarters, then head for the gate.”

“We’ll be there,” Vil said.

“What about breakfast though,” Ruggie whined.

“Maybe she forgot,” Epel slightly questioned.

“I think we should stop at The Wallflower just to get something light to eat,” Ortho voiced his opinion. The rest of the group agreed and left the headquarters.

……

Location: Outlands of Obsidian Fieldlands

“That person Volo was quite strange,” Malleus voices his thoughts.

“I agree,” Vil nodded his head. “To almost come out of nowhere and demand a battle out of us was not a welcoming experience.”

“Good thing Rook stepped up to take the battle,” Trey sighed.

“Chouette de chasse(Hunter’s owl) and I do make a pretty good team,” Rook petted the Rowlet that was on his shoulder.

“I thought I said to not give the creatures nicknames,” Riddle fumed.

“Ah, but Roi des Roses, I couldn’t help myself,” Rook confessed. “Especially after how well we battled together!”

“It’s incredible though that the Pokemon are able to level up and learn new moves,” Lilia looked at the Pokemon that was happily following Silver. “They do seem to be quite intelligent.”

“Maybe people fear Pokemon since they aren’t able to communicate with them well,” Cater wondered out loud.

“How much longer is this going to take,” Idia complained. He certainly did not appreciate all the walking.

“Based on the map, we have about 2 kilometers left before we reach Obsidian Fieldlands,” Ortho answered.

“We should find a Pokemon that you could ride on,” Kalim jokes.

“That’s actually not a bad idea,” Jamil muttered.

“The nature is beautiful,” Jade commented, he was looking at the greenery as the group walked by.

“It doesn’t seem like another village is anywhere in distance,”Jack observed. “And I don’t smell any other people around.”

“How old fashioned is this world,” Ace sighed. “We’re lucky our phones still kinda work.”

……

Location: Obsidian Fieldlands

“So this is our base camp⎼the last safe haven before you reach the wilds,” Akari explained not to soon after the group arrived. “For your trial, you must catch three species of Pokemon: Bidoof, Starly, and Shinx! Are you ready to get started?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” Leona answered with a yawn.

“Oh, Professor,” Akari exclaimed when she saw Laventon approach the group.

“Ah, well, you see…” Laveton looked down with a somewhat sad look on his face. “Captain Cyllene got a hold of me after you all left… She impressed upon me that I bear full responsibility for whatever happens to ‘our sudden guests’.”

“That’s our merciless captain,” Akari shook her head, unsurprised. “But what help exactly can you offer out here, Professor?”

“My dear girl, I don’t intend to lift a finger,” Laventon answered honestly and Akari’s eye twitched. “Our new friends’ talents are the real deal. He’ll pass with flying colors⎼you’ll see!”

“He sure has a lot of faith in us,” Ruggie snickered.

“Ah,” Akari dryly smiled with her eyes closed. “So the responsibility for them still lies, in fact, with me, then. Well, I’m sure that they’ll be fine! Let’s begin with the trial!” Akari turns and starts to walk towards a dirt path. The group follows her, slightly concerned for her. She stops at the top of the dirt path and looks out over the land.

“This is Aspiration Hill,” Akari elucidates. “The species of Pokemon you’re meant to catch all live here.” Everyone looked out over the land and some spotted a small rodent-like Pokemon along the dirt path. “And along comes a Bidoof! Time to get ready to catch it. The key is to aim carefully. Not that you seem to need my advice⎼I’m just sharing what I know. Bidoof has a mellow disposition. That means it tends not to run from people, so this’ll be easy!”

“Hey Kalim,” Epel called. “Could you pass me a PokeBall?”

“Yeah, sure,” Kalim gives Epel a PokeBall and Epel walks down the dirt path to where the Bidoof was. Epel took a deep breath and threw the PokeBall at the Bidoof’s head. The PokeBall opened up and the Bidoof went inside. The ball spun a few times before the halo of stars appeared.

“You caught a Bidoof,” Akari cheered. “Well done, Epel! Now it’s time for the next Pokemon.” Epel went and picked up the PokeBall and placed it in his satchel. He caught up to the group who were looking at a small bird Pokemon. “There’s a Starly. They’re skittish little things⎼they’ll run if startled. But you should be able to get close to them if you crouch⎼you’ll be harder to spot!”

“Kalim, toss me a PokeBall,” Cater requested. Kalim tossed a PokeBall to Cater and he went to the patch of tall grass. He crouched down and got as close to the Starly as he could, then threw the PokeBall. The Starly went into the PokeBall and was easily caught. Cater ran up to the PokeBall and picked it up.

“That’s Starly caught as well,” Akari noted. “Only one more Pokemon to go.” They continued down the path. Ace spotted a wild leek that he picked up. “I forgot⎼there’s something I ought to teach you, since you’re still new to this! Throw your Pokemon’s ball at rocks⎼or trees like this one⎼to have it investigate. If your Pokemon finds any berries or other items, it’ll bring them to you! We’ve now reached your final hurdle: catching a Shinx.”

“Let’s go Cider,” Epel says as he throws Bidoof’s PokeBall at the base of the tree. The Bidoof comes out of its ball and climbs up the tree. A few moments later, it climbs back down the tree and gives Epel the berries it found, then it returns to its PokeBall and Epel catches the ball.

“That was something,” Malleus mumbled. He was very fascinated by this new world and the Pokemon that inhabited it. He was also excited to get some Pokemon of his own.

“There. That’s Shinx,” Akari points out a Pokemon a bit further down the path. The Pokemon in question gave out a roar. “Shinx has an aggressive disposition. Could you already tell that?”

“Not really,” Floyd said. “It looks squeezable.”

“Not to worry,” Akari smiled. “These things become clear once you focus on the Pokemon around you. Once aggressive Pokemon get irate, they’ll knock aside any ball you throw at them. Don’t worry, though! I’ll teach you the trick to catching aggressive Pokemon! You’ve got to battle them! Once they’re absorbed with battling, you can throw a PokeBall at them to try to catch them! By now, you’ve got several Pokemon of your own, don’t you?”

“You were there when we got the Pokemon,” Azul sweat-dropped.

“Take your Pokemon’s PokeBall and throw it near a wild Pokemon you want to battle,” Akari continued, ignoring Azul. “I’ve got no doubt you’ll hold your own in battle!”

“I’m gonna take a crack at battling,” Epel said, stepping closer to the Shinx. The Shinx noticed Epel and charged at him. Epel grabbed his PokeBall that contained his Pokemon and threw it at the Shinx. “Let’s go Cider!”

“I thought we weren’t gonna name them,” Riddle shouted in frustration. The wild Shinx had used Quick Attack on the Bidoof.

“Cider, use Rollout,” Epel commanded. His Bidoof used Rollout on the wild Shinx. The Shinx had used Quick Attack again. Epel had his Bidoof use Rollout again.

“He seems like a natural,” Rook praised.

Ortho had taken a look at the Pokemon’s health bar, “Epel, you can try to catch it now.”

“Thanks, Ortho,” Epel thanked him. Epel pulled out a PokeBall that he had hidden in his satchel and threw it at the Shinx. The Shinx went into the PokeBall and moved a few times before the ring of stars appeared. The Shinx was caught.

“You all approached those Pokemon without a hint of fear… and caught each one,” Akari exclaimed. “You’re like a gift from the sky dropped to us!”

“We did fall from the sky though,” Cater pointed out.

“With you at our side, I think the Survey Corps has a real chance of compiling a complete Pokedex as we’ve been ordered,” Akari cheered. “This is wonderful! I’m still curious why on earth you came falling from the sky like you did… but for now, let’s tell the professor we’re ready to head back!” The group walked back up the dirt path to the base camp where the professor was.

“I said you’d pass the trial with flying colors, and it seems you all went and did just that,” Laventon praised. “Congratulations, everyone! You’ve taken your first step toward seeking out every Pokemon! This calls for a commemorative photograph.” Laventon pulled out a camera and took a picture of the group.

“With skills like yours, I suppose this was a foregone conclusion,” Akari praised.

“Hey, weren’t you just bashing us,” Ace said.

“Ace, calm yourself,” Riddle scolded. “I see where you are coming from, but the trial is over now.”

“Whatever,” Ace mutters.

“Now then, we’d best report to Captain Cyllene,” Laventon states. “Time to head back to Jubilife Village, eh?”

“Do we have to walk all the way back,” Idia questioned.

“I brought Ponyta drawn carriages for us to ride back in,” Laventon smiled.

“Ponyta…” Silver lets the Pokemon’s name roll off the tip of his tongue.

“Come on, let’s go,” Akari laughs as she runs over to the carriages.

“This is so cool,” Epel exclaims as he starts to run over to the carriages pulling Jack along with him. Deuce and Ace look at each other and run to catch up to Epel and Jack. The rest of the group walks behind the four first years. Once everyone is settled into the carriages, they take off back to Jubilife Village.

...to be continued

#disney twst #twst au #twst wonderland #twst x pokemon #pokemon

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