#marriage be like

[livingmybestfictionallife]

Yesterday, I put three Hershey kisses in my pocket to eat on my drive home. I completely forgot about them (thanks recently diagnosed ADHD) until I got home and Put my hand in my pocket. Melted chocolate was smushed all in my fingers.

My husband took my car to work today and, apparently, at some point yesterday I put my car key in the pocket with the chocolate in it. While at work, I received this:

😂😂😂 He’s been reading a little too much Where the SideWalk Ends to our son.

#shit my husband says #y’all please react to this bc he likes to know how he does on tumblr #he doesn’t have social media so y’all’s reactions make him giddy #poem #poetry #poems on tumblr #poem of the day #where the sidewalk ends #married life #marry your best friend #married #marriage be like #marriage #my husband #my husband is the best #husband #love poetry #love poem #i love him #friends to lovers #dramatic #dramatic ass #choclate #cars #car key #story time

[hellfirehaley]

I genuinely find it hilarious that my husband hates country music…and we live in Kansas. So guess which one of us is torturing the other with the sounds of Garth Brooks while we clean the house up

#Haley talks shit #marriage be like #Spotify

[ghostjelliess]

For 8 out of the 12 years we've been together, I have been embarrassed by a memory of talking about my now-fiance and I making ravioli, when he suddenly commented that it wasn't him, that it must have been with an ex. I have a really good memory, he does not. But I was so embarrassed by that idea that I believed him and left the whole thing in limbo. Whenever we talked about memories getting mixed up, one of us would nod knowingly and cite the ravioli incident.

Tonight, while going through old photos, I have found documentation of he and I making ravioli.

Our world will never be the same.

#we laughed so hard we cried #he said “like the ravioli” just means im right now #memories #marriage be like #long term love #in it for the laughs #it was an entire seven pictures #circa 2012 #i still had a flip phone #i was poor #the ravioli was bad #we havent made it since #im a really good cook now #he said thats not a date night #thats a test

[comradekatara]

to me, the funniest thing about “that’s rough buddy” isn’t the fact that sokka says something patently insane with zero context seemingly out of nowhere, or the fact that zuko clearly doesn’t know how to respond. it’s the completely incorrect use of the word “buddy.” zuko would obviously like to be friends with sokka, but sokka is not, in fact, his friend. this is the most time they’ve ever spent together, and it’s because zuko invited himself to tag along on sokka’s suicide mission. at this point in the episode, sokka still hates this guy, perhaps less than he did a week ago, but he still hates him enough that he didn’t bother forcing zuko to stay home, which means he still didn’t really care whether or not zuko lives or dies. which, considering that he had tried to kill zuko multiple times in the past, is not all that surprising. this entire episode is essentially just zuko forcing his friendship onto sokka while sokka is legitimately too depressed to care. so when zuko calls sokka “buddy,” there’s a spirit of dogged optimism characterizing that epithet, because in no possible realm would sokka consider zuko his buddy at this point in the episode. and that’s something we miss when noting the iconicness of this exchange, simply because, by the end of this episode, they are buddies, so in our minds looking back on these lines, the implication of friendship doesn’t feel out of place at all. and really, it isn’t out of place, but only because zuko’s tenacity and determination (in this instance, his determination to befriend sokka) has always hugely outweighed his ability to read the room.

#and not for nothing but i think if anyone called zuko buddy (such as aang for example) he would melodramatically groan or something #by all accounts this is not a word he would ever use #but this is his first time even mildly successful socializing with a guy his age #and hes like ‘this is how males communicate right?’ #‘if i call him buddy it shall establish camaraderie. which is the first step to marriage’ #zuko #sokka #sokkaxzuko #90% of my zukka posts are about how sokka hates zuko and wants to kill him #but i think that’s an important contribution to the zukka ecosystem . perhaps even the most important

[and-this-of-all-my-hopes]

So, I feel like I’m losing my mind. I keep seeing metas about how Aziraphale wants Crowley to return to Heaven and be an angel again because he wants them to be on the same side/be good/change/etc., etc., etc. but I don’t see that at all. I actually see it as the very opposite.

Aziraphale loves Crowley just as he is. But there’s something more. Something huge.

Aziraphale loves Crowley and because he is an angel who is stuck in seeing things as black and white, he constantly praises Crowley for being nice. For being good. For being kind.

Aziraphale has watched Crowley on and off for 6,000 years. He watched him thwart the plans of Heaven and Hell because it was unjust. He spared the lives of innocents. He did small things that made Aziraphale happy just because (like making Hamlet successful and saving valuable books). And because Aziraphale sees things in black and white, he sees all the things Crowley has done as nice, as good, as kind.

Crowley vehemently attests he’s not nice or good or kind.

He’s not exactly wrong nor is he lying when he says this. When Crowley spares goats during a cruel bet over a righteous man and swallowing laudanum to prevent a suicide, when he prevents Armageddon by working with Aziraphale and stopping the Anti-Christ from being the Anti-Christ, he’s not doing the nice/good/kind thing.

He’s doing the right thing.

Crowley chooses to do the right thing without hesitation. He is better than all of Heaven and Hell who have callous and dispassionate view of all existence because he questions, because he makes choices. Crowley sees the world for all its messiness and he sees himself. He sees a place where he fits in. He sees the blurred edges.

And Aziraphale sees that, even if seeing the blurred edges is hard for him.

But here’s the thing that Aziraphale can’t voice.

It’s the reason why he told Crowley about being allowed to return to Heaven and become an angel again. He doesn’t want Crowley to change. He doesn’t think Crowley is flawed. Or not enough.

It’s something that is so monumental that it cannot be put into words. Because to put it into words would be more than blasphemy. It’s down right unthinkable for anyone in Heaven, Hell, or Earth to say what Aziraphale knows deep in his soul.

God was wrong to cast out Crowley.

Aziraphale believes Crowley can/should return to Heaven because he knows that Crowley should never have fallen in the first place. He wants him to be forgiven because when Crowley fell it was unjust. Aziraphale is trying to correct a mistake. He’s trying to do the right thing.

Yes, Crowley would never accept returning to Heaven. And Aziraphale was wrong to even suggest it (although that conversation is another can of worms to unpack).

Aziraphale loves Crowley. He loves him exactly as he is. He doesn’t want him to change. Aziraphale knows that Crowley the best of all of them. He wants to change Heaven because of it. Because God was wrong and Aziraphale knows it.

Aziraphale may have difficulty seeing beyond black and white, but when it comes to Crowley he sees everything crystal clear and in vivid color.

#good omens #good omens 2 #good omens meta #hold on to your butts #because here be outright blasphemy #aziraphale #crowley #neil gaiman #warning this post has been known to cause psychic damage #and in one instance a proposal of marriage #neil liked this post #whaaaaaaaaaaat #good omens spoilers #michael sheen #david tennant #ineffable husbands #tell me I’m wrong

[savaralyn2]

Dungeon Meshi - The Origin Of His Name

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #dm #translation #shuro #laios #ahahahhaha laios just picked him up like a stray dog #falin #also the marriage hunter girl is there!! #chilchuck #namari

[catsharky]

Presenting: King Sidon, his wife Queen Yona and his boyfriend Link.

Yona is very supportive of everything except Sidon forgetting his ceremony cues.

(I had an atrocious week and TotK has been coming in clutch for keeping me sane.)

#totk spoilers #loz totk #sidlink #link x sidon #totk yona #totk link #totk sidon #tears of the kingdom #I love Yona I adore her design oh my god #If I were to create a Zelda-sona it'd basically just be her with different clothes so I'm contractually obligated to love her #But Nintendo trying to give Sidon a case of the not-gays with her is hilarious #The man greets his fiancée like a coworker and then turns around to explode with adoration over Link in the same breath #This is either a Lavender Marriage or a case of 'every royal Zora finds Link irresistible'. I like both but prefer the former #Like. Yona meets Zelda once things are settled and gets all flustered and tongue tied #and neither Sidon or Link have any idea what's going on because they share 1 braincell #which is used exclusively for fighting really good #sharky art #zelda comic

[whetstonefires]

You know what I realize that people underestimate with Pride & Prejudice is the strategic importance of Jane.

Because like, I recently saw Charlotte and Elizabeth contrasted as the former being pragmatic and the latter holding out for a love match, because she's younger and prettier and thinks she can afford it, and that is very much not what's happening.

The Charlotte take is correct, but the Elizabeth is all wrong. Lizzie doesn't insist on a love match. That's serendipitous and rather unexpected. She wants, exactly as Mr. Bennet says, someone she can respect. Contempt won't do. Mr. Bennet puts it in weirdly sexist terms like he's trying to avoid acknowledging what he did to himself by marrying a self-absorbed idiot, but it's still true. That's what Elizabeth is shooting for: a marriage that won't make her unhappy.

She's grown up watching how miserable her parents make one another; she's not willing to sign up for a lifetime of being bitter and lonely in her own home.

I think she is very aware, in refusing Mr. Collins, that it's reasonably unlikely that anyone she actually respects is going to want her, with her few accomplishments and her lack of property. That she is turning down security and the chance keep the house she grew up in, and all she gets in return may be spinsterhood.

But, crucially, she has absolute faith in Jane.

The bit about teaching Jane's daughters to embroider badly? That's a joke, but it's also a serious potential life plan. Jane is the best creature in the world, and a beauty; there's no chance at all she won't get married to someone worthwhile.

(Bingley mucks this up by breaking Jane's heart, but her prospects remain reasonable if their mother would lay off!)

And if Elizabeth can't replicate that feat, then there's also no doubt in her mind that Jane will let her live in her house as a dependent as long as she likes, and never let it be made shameful or awful to be that impoverished spinster aunt. It will be okay never to be married at all, because she has her sister, whom she trusts absolutely to succeed and to protect her.

And if something eventually happens to Jane's family and they can't keep her anymore, she can throw herself upon the mercy of the Gardeners, who have money and like her very much, and are likewise good people. She has a support network--not a perfect or impregnable one, but it exists. It gives her realistic options.

Spinsterhood was a very dangerous choice; there are reasons you would go to considerable lengths not to risk it.

But Elizabeth has Jane, and her pride, and an understanding of what marrying someone who will make you miserable costs.

That's part of the thesis of the book, I would say! Recurring Austen thought. How important it is not to marry someone who will make you, specifically, unhappy.

She would rather be a dependent of people she likes and trusts than of someone she doesn't, even if the latter is formally considered more secure; she would rather live in a happy, reasonable household as an extra than be the mistress of her own home, but that home is full of Mr. Collins and her mother.

This is a calculation she's making consciously! She's not counting on a better marriage coming along. She just feels the most likely bad outcome from refusing Mr. Collins is still much better than the certain outcome of accepting him. Which is being stuck with Mr. Collins forever.

Elizabeth is also being pragmatic. Austen also endorses her choice, for the person she is and the concerns she has. She's just picking different trade-offs than Charlotte.

Elizabeth's flaw is not in her own priorities; she doesn't make a reckless choice and get lucky. But in being unable to accept that Charlotte's are different, and it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with Charlotte.

Because realistically, when your marriage is your whole family and career forever, and you only get to pick the ones that offer themselves to you, when you are legally bound to the status of dependent, you're always going to be making some trade-offs.

😂 Even the unrealistically ideal dream scenario of wealthy handsome clever ethical Mr. Darcy still asks you to undergo personal growth, accommodate someone else's communication style, and eat a little crow.

#hoc est meum #pride and prejudice #elizabeth bennet #charlotte lucas #meta #charlotte is a much less sociable person than lizzie #so avoiding her husband most of the time and not seeking out his company is more viable for her! #she also has more patience for people being wrong #partly i think because she kinds checks out and lets them get on with it which lizzie isn't too great at even with her mother #people have different needs like that's a thing okay #marriage #spinsterhood #pragmatism #like if elizabeth had to listen to collins talk for a few months straight she would be nearly insane with rage #he's not just a low-quality man he's a man designed to be the worst for her specifically #also note that because jane's marriage is elizabeth's fallback plan #darcy screwed her over personally by interfering between her and bingley #she ofc does not bring this up how could she #but it's intensifying the anger during the hunsford rejection i think

[isitdonproof]

"You should never underestimate the power of love"

#it makes it sound like phoenix wants to get married and edgeworth thinks marriage is a sham and they've had many an argument about this :') #ace attorney #spirit of justice #ace attorney spirit of justice #phoenix wright #miles edgeworth #narumitsu #wrightworth #mein

[ayilings]

in the sunlit garden, holding hands / because i’ve never forgotten our promise, i’ve come all this way at last

#revolutionary girl utena #utenanthy #shoujo kakumei utena #utena tenjou #anthy himemiya #rgu #utena x anthy #sku #that hazel video where shes like girls kissing as though in a holy marriage #??? feels not normal about themb #i just wanted to draw them going mwah #<- unwell #art #lgbtqia #lesbian #2023 #ayilings

[radiance1]

"I need to find my darling husband!" Said Danny, dressed to the nines in a very elaborate royal dress with a lot of jewelry running through the ballroom after having been on the opposite end of a very worrying phone call.

"Seriously, what do you even see in that mortal!?" Screamed an observant and Danny stopped and leveled them with a glare cold enough to freeze over an active volcano and sharp enough to cut through obsidian.

"He makes me laugh."

Unlike those dead suitors went unsaid, but everyone at the ball (read: search for a bride/groom for the royal ghostling) practically heard it anyways.

Meanwhile over in the land of the living

Okay so Jason may have messed up. Now you see, he hasn't seen his platonic husband for tax benefits in a while, and he's been very careful to not let his identity as the Red Hood slip up before . Not even once in their relationship.

(He's not counting the time his in-laws sniffed him out as a Crime Lord, because Danny never believed them.)

Now, it wasn't exactly his fault he slipped up. You try to fight off an entire group after being pulled up on out of nowhere on the phone while trying to hide said noises of fighting.

Who was he calling? Danny of course since he said he was away for business. What business? Never specified and Jason wasn't going to pry.

So now here he was, bound 'helplessly' as Jason Todd along with a few other random civilians. Which, like, rude.

Wasn't he already good enough for this ancient ritual or whatever?

You know, he really should have walked with that "Anti-kidnapping device" he got that one time. Which honestly he feels like he should be surprised that such a thing exists but considering it was from Bruce. Well.

He's not surprised.

Oh, there's the Justice League now. Shame, he wanted to knock out a few guys himself- Oh, now he's being used to summon a ghost from the Infinite Realms of Royal Lineage.

Yea he probably should have walked with that "Anti-kidnapping device."

Wait a goddamn-

Is that-

"My darling husband!" Danny shouted, scooping him off the circle and away from the head cultist and swinging him around. "You had me worried sick!"

Now, he should ask the question anyone would in this situation when finding out your best friend and platonic husband for tax benefits was apparently a ghost of royal lineage.

"Why're you in a dress?"

"Okay, first of all I rock this thing." Danny huffed.

"That you do." Jason agreed rather easily.

"Second of all, blame those guys over there." He jerked his head in the direction of two very green floating eyeball people.

Not the weirdest he's seen, honestly.

The Observants were whispering to each other and leveling them-Jason in particular-a look.

"Now as you can see, I already have a spouse and I don't need another!" Danny hugged Jason closer for emphasis and he took the time to whisper in Danny's ear. "Did you really marry me to play the husband card?"

"Well, yes." Danny agreed. "But also because of taxes, because I love you and you're my best friend."

"So, we're still done for watching that movie right."

"Obviously."

A pained grunt came from below them and they both looked down to see Batman standing over a very unconscious cultist and looking up at them.

Hm.

He forgot they were there.

"So," Jason began, staring Bruce straight in the eyes. Batman's eyes narrowed. "Don't suppose we can push that forward to right now?"

"Yea, sure why not I'm not doing anything important." Danny leveled the Observants a look, and before either they, Batman, or the Justice League could do anything they both disappeared.

#dc x dp #dp x dc #dpxdc #dp x dc crossover #dcxdp #dc x dp crossover #I think this was originally supposed to be a Danny as Peach and Jason as Mario cosplay idea #With still a focus on their platonic marriage #Buuuuut #Then I got hit with the royal idea and #yea #Mostly because I forgot about said previous idea #Jason: Hm I'm going to have so much explaining to do with the old man #Also Jason: But I don't feel like it so *disappears* #Batman: *Tired dad sigh* #ghost prince danny #Or like #ghost heir danny #He ain't king and the title is vague #Just because

[livingmybestfictionallife]

Find yourself a partner who you can laugh with, because when your husband tells you that you have the personality of Aubrey Plaza, dress like Steve Buscemi (specifically in Big Daddy), and sometimes make voices that ends up sounding like Christopher Walken, you really have no other option.

Seven years of this man’s antics.

#shit my husband says #relationship goals #relationship advice #aubrey plaza #christopher walken #steve buscemi #marry your best friend #married life #marriage be like #husband #my husband #but i love it #nerd love

[wasabi-gumdrop]

Kabru has a secret admirer in the castle!

#running from my responsibilities (drawing armour) by imagining post canon Kabru fashion #minor spoilers in the tags! #royal advisor Kabru’s office is probably overflowing with gifts from foreign dignitaries eyeing him up for marriage #and sacks of perfumed letters from Melini citizens #Marcille would be so sick of it #Laios also has his fair share of proposals #Yaad is like … boys spare us all and pick a suitable candidate already #well Yaad there’s a saying that goes two birds one stone #anyway lol #someone might have suggested to Laios ‘hey Kabru works so hard. you should show your appreciation.’ #Laios (blushing sweating): uuuh how do i do that #Marcille probably: i hear it’s customary to give your royal advisor flowers the same colour as their beautiful blue eyes #Laios: well if you say so #but he starts having second thoughts bcs what if the gift is too romantic #so then Laios is like oh i know i just won’t sign it (: #fool proof plan Laios good job #totally not taking into account that Kabru can recognize his penmanship at a first glance #so at their next meeting Kabru is like ‘i wonder who my secret admirer in the castle is 😉’ #and Laios sweats so hard he falls out of his throne #doesn’t Kabru of Melini have a nice ring to it #better yet …. Kabru Touden #much to consider #dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi spoilers #kabru #kabru of utaya #labru #if you squint #wasabi doodles

[quesadillayuri]

my husband REFUSES to sign the divorce papers (real) (not clickbait)

@pactw, tumblr / you will still be mine, waitress / tommyinnit & tubbo get married, tommyinnit / tubbo's relationship with tommyinnit, qsmp wiki / tommyinnit & tubbo, twitter / tommy & tubbo say their goodbyes, dream smp tvtropes / should've read the fine print, ao3 / i'm just tom, tommyinnit (youtube) / how to tell kids about a divorce, brainmind

#this is quite literally nothing #i just like web weaving and thought this was funny #tommy tubbo marriage and subsequent demanding of divorce and then ? reconciliation ? u will always be famous #tommyinnit #tubbo #qsmp #mcyt #clingy duo #web weaving #webweaving #web weave #webweave

[sweeneydino]

Leos are banned, except for '87.

#tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #art #rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #crossover #tmnt crossover #tmnt 2003 #tmnt mirage #tmnt 1987 #tmnt leo #rottmnt krang #rottmnt kraang prime #rottmnt krang leader #krang one #tmnt 2003 ch'rell #tmnt 2003 shredder #krang one x ch'rell #tbh theyd prob never have a marriage; but like it was too funny to pass up #krell #tmnt krell

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Bonus 8: How met your mother (CSSR design by @qourmet!)

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#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #cangse sanren #wei changze #jiang fengmian #It was important to me that WCZ had the hereditary mole. I will die on this hill. #I have been *waiting* for the day to finally arrive when I could finally make this comic. It's been marinating for months. #My mission is to redraw all of qour's character designs one day. They are just *that* good. #CSSR has the vibes of a wandering menace who shows up in towns like a stray cat arriving at a new doorstep for treats. 10/10. #While YZY strongly leads us to believe that JFM was in love with CSSR and that's his whole motivation behind taking wwx in- #-I do think this is (once again) rumour being presented as reality. It's the juicer story to tell after all. #It is still possible that he did love her! But I think that story undercuts the relationship he also had with WCZ. #Yall ever think about how JC and WWX parallel their fathers? How Wei Changze also left the Jiang Leader's side? I do. #Unlike JC though It is far more hilarious and plausible to imagine JFM begging to be CSSR and WCZ's third. You know he would. #My wild headcanon is that JFM and YZY are in a mlm and wlw arranged marriage situation. Deeply unhappy as partners. Better as friends. #they care for each other and I'll admit that there is a beautiful tragedy in them having romantic feelings for each other the whole time. #But I am also here for the gaffs. Let them be unfulfilled homosexuals together. #Meanwhile cssr and wcz are having incredible hetrosexual sex in a bisexual way that WILL leave him pregnant by the end of it.