#no school this week though! not cuz we get the week off for christmas its cuz im sick | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sadclearance · 3 years

Note

could u do male reader's been friends with todoroki from mha for since ua (they're newly pros now) and tells him ily and is like ik ur not good with that stuff tho so it's no big! i don't expect an ily back! and todoroki's like :O and doesn't say it back but later when reader's hurt during a mission todoroki's like oh dang i do love u but it's too late cuz he died

pairing: shoto todoroki x male!reader

summary: todoroki says "i love you" back eventually. it just happens to be too late.

category: angst

warning(s): death

word count: 1649

key:

s/t - skin tone

italicized - text

he's not sure how he got to this exact moment.

if you had told him at the beginning of his high school years that not even just a year after graduating, he'd be running around a deserted parking lot with the cold breeze of the night air nipping at the skin that wasn't covered by his pajamas--which happen to be from a two-years-old matching christmas set with the person he's trying to catch--todoroki would've looked at you as if you were a lunatic.

never in his wildest dreams could he ever imagine this.

but he thinks this is part of what being friends is, and back then, he never would've dreamt of having one of those either.

he doesn't notice the warm breath right next to his ear until a steady voices says, loud and clear, "i love you."

he turns his head so fast his face almost smacks into y/n's, and y/n laughs out visible puffs in the crisp air.

todoroki doesn't even speak. he just stares with wide eyes, not knowing what to do.

this is all just too new to him, and this came out of absolutely nowhere.

"glad that got your attention," y/n smiles when the silence continues. "you were so lost in your thoughts you just stopped moving. i was starting to think you didn't want your phone back."

todoroki now remembers the reason why he was chasing his best friend of four years around an empty parking lot at this ungodly hour, where half of his body was uncomfortably cold.

he does want his phone back, but he doesn't go back to running.

"was that why you said that?" todoroki eventually asks. was it only for the surprise factor? because if so, he's both relieved and disappointed--two things that he recognizes as contradictory and doesn't understand. well, todoroki's never been too good at understanding feelings, so that's not really news.

"nope," y/n answers without skipping a beat, and if todoroki didn't know better, he'd think y/n wasn't nervous at all. the s/t fingers playing with the edge of todoroki's phone case lets him know otherwise. "don't take it too seriously, though. i get it."

get what?

that answer doesn't make todoroki happy at all. now his brain's just muddled and confused, and he can barely process his surroundings. what's he supposed to make of that interaction? don't take it too seriously? he gets it?

when y/n's ran a lap or two without todoroki making a move to get his phone back, he lies down on the floor.

todoroki settles on "you're going to get dirty" because he wants to get back to the present. his head hurts, and thinking isn't getting him anywhere right now.

"come look at the stars with me," y/n reaches his hand up toward the skies, and he looks ridiculous, but todoroki complies because he wants to enjoy the time they have together for as long as he can. they won't have time to see each other for a while, being busy growing heroes and all.

"is this considered stargazing?"

"we're gazing at the stars, so yeah, i'd say so," y/n jokes.

and now todoroki's out of things to say that aren't questions about y/n's confession.

y/n turns his head to look at todoroki, and todoroki instinctively does the same.

"you're taking that thing i told you not to take seriously seriously, aren't you?"

"i'm having trouble understanding everything you've said in the past few minutes," todoroki admits, turning his head back to face the stars again.

"okay, well, i love you," y/n says.

"you've said that, but--"

"but i don't want you to take it seriously because i get it."

"again, you've said that in almost those exact words." todoroki feels like a frustrated child who's getting cranky over a math problem he doesn't know how to solve.

"i love you in the way that i want to kiss you and go on dates with you and maybe do more stuff," y/n's face reddens at his own words, but his voice is firm.

todoroki's eyes go back to y/n's, and he opens his mouth to say something, but nothing comes out.

"i know you don't see me that way, and it's all good. i didn't expect anything in return. i just wanted to say it."

"i... i wish i could give you a response, but... you already know that..." todoroki struggles with his words. were these the right ones to say? which are supposed to come out next?

"that you're not good with people stuff. yeah, i remember the first year of me trying to court you into this friendship," y/n laughs.

todoroki wants to laugh while reminiscing the memories too, but he doesn't feel like doing so, especially with how he's pretty sure he just rejected his best friend.

"i told you, no expectations here. just wanted to get that off my chest." y/n rises from the floor and todoroki's eyes follow. "c'mon, we should get going. it's cold, and our schedules are packed for the week. we can't afford to be getting sick."

"yes, it is late," todoroki nods and gets up as well.

the car beeps to signal that the doors are open, and todoroki's about to get into the driver's seat when he sees y/n walking off somewhere else.

"y/n?" todoroki calls out.

"i'm gonna take the bus," y/n answers before todoroki even asks.

"they aren't running at this hour."

"my place is close. i'm gonna walk."

"but--"

"text me if your schedule clears at all!" y/n waves without turning around to face todoroki.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

it's been a week, and todoroki still feels the pressure of having to give a proper response.

y/n said it was fine, but even someone with as little experience with these types of things as todoroki recognizes that it's not kind.

i haven't thought about--

i've never kissed anyone--

human relationships--familial, romantic, platonic, and otherwise are all things that are new to me--

no matter what he types, he feels like the words are all wrong. what's in his drafts are all things that y/n already knows. that's why he said he "gets it".

but todoroki's still so frustrated. he wants to respond properly. he feels like it's only right.

but holy shit is it hard to come up with anything at all.

before he can come up with another poorly worded apology, excuse--whatever it is that he's trying to say--he gets a notification.

assistance required in x prefecture. requesting all available heroes.

todoroki, being the good hero he is, rushes to the sight as soon as possible.

he recognizes the name of the location, but he brushes it off as past experience. after all, within the past year, due to his rising popularity, he's had a lot of opportunities to work in different places.

"what's the situation?" todoroki asks one of the heroes that's trying to stabilize the building that the villain appeared to be in.

"one guy with a geokinesis quirk. he's alone, but his quirk's pretty strong. took out the whole village one town over. we don't know his goal, but the whole building's stone, and we don't want to take any chances."

"is there any way you would like me to help?"

"i'd say ice the whole building, but this guy's got quick reflexes. try going in discretely and trap him in ice when he's caught in surprise."

todoroki nods and is about to enter the building when

"also, try not to ice the other hero in there. i think his name's y/--"

the building crumbles at an incredible speed, and he barely has time to throw both himself and the other hero out of the way.

once the other man is stable, todoroki goes to assess the damage. the rocks are still tumbling down, but they're slower now.

they feel a lot faster when todoroki catches a glimpse of an all too familiar hero costume.

"y/n!" todoroki shouts as he loses the ability to think rationally. he runs with his heart in his throat and a terrible tense feeling that starts to overwhelm his entire body, trying to reach y/n before the large boulder does.

ice spreads from his feet and meets with the chunk of stone before it can fall on y/n's head.

"i'm going to get you out of here," todoroki promises when he makes it to y/n. he calls for help while looking over the pieces of the building on top of y/n's body.

"todoroki," y/n coughs weakly, and todoroki notices a pool of red slowly start to grow on the concrete below them.

"don't talk." todoroki's voice sounds so weak and helpless, and he hates it.

y/n just smiles, but the blood dripping from the corners of his mouth keep it from spreading warmth and happiness within todoroki like it usually does.

todoroki's already seen lots of tragedy in his one year of hero work, but he's never felt so panicked in his entire life.

he tries to shift a rock, but it only makes y/n groan.

"help!" todoroki yells again, but everyone's too preoccupied with catching the villain and tending to their own serious injuries to come and rescue y/n.

"shhh, todoroki," y/n says weakly.

"don't talk!" todoroki yells this time. it's still helpless, but it's loud, and y/n starts to laugh to the best of his ability.

"hard when... when you're just so funny. that's why... i..."

"don't close your eyes." todoroki feels like his heart's stopped.

"i..." y/n's eyes droop.

"look at me!" todoroki shouts with wild eyes.

and so he does. y/n looks at him with tired eyes, but todoroki can tell that he's straining himself to do so.

"i love you," todoroki's eyes feel heavy and his nose burns. "please... i love you, too..."

but it's too late.

the open eyes are quick to lose their life, and y/n's skin loses its color.

"i love you."

❥๑━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━๑❥

a/n;

deadass i was listening to my discover weekly on spotify and when i was writing the last few sentences i love you by wavves came on

i didn't know what to title it so i just left it

i hope it was satisfactory anon!

#todoroki shōto #shouto todoroki #x male reader #todoroki shoto x male reader #male reader insert #bnha x male reader #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #mlm

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the-iron-kettle · 4 years

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Tony makes Pepper a lot of peppermint drinks cuz her name is Pepper and he's real cute. Turns out, Pepper doesn't really like peppermint and doesn't know how to tell him.

By the sixth peppermint-themed Tuesday special, Pepper gets it: Tony the Cute Barista likes her.

The thought of it sends her heart kind of aflutter. After all, she’d been coming to the Iron Kettle for almost two years now because she—and she’d only recently admitted this, so be gentle with her—had a huge crush on the owner, so much so that every time he had locked her gaze with those sparkling eyes and smiled (not smirked, though she liked those, too) and pointed her attention to the weekly special she had said yes.

Yes, and then under her breath, eugh, because she despises peppermint.

It’s going that way again, now, on the day of the thirteenth peppermint beverage special this year.

“Miss Pepper,” Tony greets, straightening his posture. God, he’s cute. “How are we this fine spring day?”

“Mr. Carbonell,” Pepper returns cheerfully. “Better now that I’m in here.” They both glanced at the windows, outside which it was absolutely pouring. “Might stay a while, actually.”

“Thank god for the rain, in that case,” Tony says, and Pepper is so fond of him she almost can’t take it. “May I interest you in this week’s Tuesday special,” he begins his pitch, gesturing to a small board on which a steaming cup and ‘I Pepper-mint What I Said!’ scribed in chalk, “white hot chocolate with Happy’s infamous homemade lavender-mint marshmallow… with a twist!”

“Is the twist in the hot chocolate peppermint?” Pepper wonders.

“The twist in the hot chocolate is that it, like all of our specialty drinks, is an original recipe and made from scratch in-house. Fine, fresh, fierce, that’s our motto. Only the finest ingredients get through that door, and—”

Every Tuesday that Pepper comes in, she daydreams just telling him that it’s a sweet gesture, truly. She would smirk devastatingly and they would banter like they always do and she would finish with a smug but seriously. Enough peppermint.

But then he does this. He rambles (as long as she’s the only one in line) on and on and on about the drink, about the ingredients or the process that he’s clearly proud of, and about how he and Happy creatively infused the freshness of this and that into their creations. It’s all bullshit, she’s pretty sure, just a peacock performance for her, but gosh, does she like hearing him speak.

And he speaks with his hands, and moves oceans with his eyes, and when they lock on her occasionally—with the flecks of hazel, and the pretty eyelashes—well, how was she supposed to be able to resist that?

“—but basically, yes, it’s a regular white cocoa but the whipped cream tastes like Christmas in your mouth.”

Maybe Pepper can just surreptitiously wick off the whipped cream. “I’ll take a medium, then, please.”

“I’ll bring it right over,” Tony smiles after she pays.

Pepper sits down with her book and her hot drink, brought over by Tony with a pep in his step so obvious Pepper reads the same sentence at least eight times after he leaves, and she is quickly joined by Tony’s nearly-seven-year-old, Peter. She likes her book, but adores the boy, putting away her book easily, far more interested in hearing about what he learned in school today.

“Are you saving the whipped cream for last?” Peter asks curiously as he peers into her mug, only a few sips left, but the full stack of peaked cream still there. “It’s really yummy.”

Pepper chuckles. “Would you like to finish it for me, then, Peter?”

Peter looks pleased, and then scandalised. “But then you won’t get any!”

The woman smiles at him assuringly. “I don’t mind. To tell you the truth, I don’t like peppermint very much.”

Peter’s face is an open book, bless him, and his confused expression makes Pepper want to squeeze his cheeks forever. “You don’t?” Suddenly, he remembers something and his eyes go wide. He glances, painfully obviously, to the counter where his father is, and Pepper curses herself for saying anything.

“Wait! Peter! Don’t tell your dad, okay? I take it back, I love peppermint. See?” Pepper makes a point of spooning some of the cream into her mouth, but the taste really is strong—those infusion techniques are no joke—and she doesn’t quite succeed in hiding her grimace in time.

“No, you don’t,” Peter accuses.

“Don’t tell Tony!” Pepper pleads through her laughter. She’s losing to a first grader.

Peter pouts, the crayon in his little hand paused in its colouring.

“Do we have a deal? Remember, you get the rest of my whipped cream,” Pepper sings. Tony is going to hate her for giving his already energetic kid more sugar, but it’s too late to worry about that now.

“Okay,” Peter chirps, reaching for her spoon. Pepper sighs. Peter hums happily as he slurps up the whipped goodness.

The next Tuesday she’s in, there is no peppermint in sight, and Pepper’s heart races because of course Peter ratted her out. The lack of peppermint in the air makes an irrational part of her that wonder if Tony doesn’t like her anymore. She hadn’t liked the drinks, but she liked him. It’s ridiculous, she knows it, but it’s called the ‘irrational’ part of her for a reason.

She thinks she manages to greet him without seeming nervous. The special of the day, presented to her by Tony without any awkwardness whatsoever, is a cayenne pepper spiced mocha.

He glances at her when he says cayenne pepper, and as ashamed as Pepper feels for admitting what she did to Peter last week, her heart skips a beat at the effort Tony is putting in to—to—get her attention.

She just barely avoids a meltdown at the register. She’s afraid, if she stands there any longer, she’ll reach over and kiss those pouty lips, and run her fingers through his soft, shaggy hair and never let go, and wouldn’t that be a scene?

She orders a medium and sits at her usual spot.

Pepper actually really, really likes the spiced coffee. She makes sure to tip off Peter and asks him, again, not to tell.

#pepperony #asks #ANJSHDHDDHS #in which mod ali does not make a shitty art :O #pepper potts #tony stark #peter parker #once again we would be nowhere without peter #mod ali #drabbles

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drkcnry67 · 3 years

Text

Dance with me?

A/N: @obxmermaid this is day 15 omg thank you for the opportunity to make christmas stories this year. im honored that i can expand my writing fandoms. today we find that its before owls, before christmas feast, before their relationship was out in the open. this is the formal, this is the hogwarts winter formal. draco and Yn are not yet a public couple but this night Draco takes the courage to ask YN to dance and no one asks questions cause all cards and rivalry’s are off the table during the dance and for that day. so this is what looks like a friendly dance between a guy and a girl. but it is so much more than that.

pairing: Draco Malfoy x reader

prompt: snowball fight/ winter formal

mentioning @sweetness47

25 days of hogwarts

the yule ball, or in some cases what would be known as a winter formal is one of the most sacred events hogwarts has the honor of throwing every 2 years. its a grand event some people have their gowns and tuxes picked out months or years ahead of the event.

but you had no gown yet for the gown you wanted was in london at a shop you had passed by so many times and the last time you did you saw a halter peacock teal floor length gown. it took your breath away.

this was the gown you wanted but alas you had no time at that moment to get it. a few days before the ball you were watching the entire dorm obsess over their gowns, choosing hair and makeup. but you and draco hadnt even discussed going to the ball.

or at least what would happen at the ball. but meeting draco for your session a few days before the formal, you were distracted and draco could tell.

Draco: something on your mind love.

YN: the formal is in 2 days and well we cant go as a couple no one outside of our friends know, and what if people ask questions.

Draco: so we wont show up together but the formal is a chance for everyone to forget the rivalry’s and grudges and hard feelings are off the table. no one will ask questions if i ask you to dance. and whats better is this will be the first of many dances to come i hope.

yn: i just wish i could walk in with you on my arm and not have to worry about a thing.

Draco: i know what you mean but it will hopefully show the professors that even our rivalry can be put aside when it matters.

YN: i hope so. i need a dress though.

Draco scribbles out a quick fire message and sends it off...

YN: what was that about...

Draco: trust me you will thank me later... just promise me you will have the time of your life at the formal besides we will dance and no one will say anything... besides i look forward to the end of the party, where you and i meet in the courtyard to just watch the stars and hide away for a kiss, all before returning to the charade and our dorms.

YN: so basically you have the entire night planned out.

Draco: more or less yes... now go you need to have energy for tomorrow. get some rest my love. go before you fall asleep on my lap.

YN: i guess your right, i will see you tomorrow in class...

you walked out of the tower and back to your dorm. where you collapsed on the bed as hermione walked in.

Hermione: so how was your tutoring tonight cuz?

YN: it was fine... we talked about the formal... he has the entire night planned out but then i told him that i didnt have anything to wear. and before you say it cuz, its fine i mean im sure he will dance with me whether im in a pretty dress or my uniform.

Hermione: i know we are gonna look killer at the formal or we are gonna fail trying to have a fun night. now what about your wardr... Oh My God! cuz get over here a box with a bow on it just showed up at the entrance.

you get up off the bed and run over to the entrance where Hermione was gawking at the box.

YN: OMG what could be in such a large box...

Hermione: well lets get it inside and happily look at this mystery package.

YN: i think i might know who this is from... but yes lets get it inside before we do anything else with this.

it was your own mind putting draco’s mysterious fire message with the sudden appearance of this box. the timing of it all was far too coincidential, but never the less you looked forward to whatever lay inside this box.

You set it on your bed, you ran your fingers over the box, tracing the bow, tracing the box outline. this was when your cousin noticed an envelope on top of the box tucked under the ribbon.

Hermione: maybe that envelope will explain better as to whats inside and possibly who its from...

you grab the envelope and open it, its a list of what is inside the box as well as instructions.

“this box contains the following items: - A-Line Scoop Neck Floor-Length Chiffon Prom Dresses With Beading Sequins in Ink Blue, - navy blue Faux Fur Fashion Wrap, -a custom bracelet in rose gold, -a gold Beautiful Rhinestone/Alloy Headband & - Black Women's Leather Suede Heels Latin With Ankle Strap. do not open this box until the day of the formal. you will look beautiful. save me a dance or several.. love always Draco”

you sat back on the bed and smiled lightly as you tucked the box under your cousin’s bed and hid the note in your dresser, you giggled yourself to sleep that night. for you knew the next 2 days would be torture till the day of the formal anyway.

you were the one person in this entire school who would ever take the dance not seriously. you were the only one whose heart would not allow you to fall in love with a person who did not share your heart.

you woke the next morning to the sound of your alarm. you went to the closet and pulled out your uniform putting it on and grabbing your cloak before heading out of the room with your wand in your sock.

YN (to self): i hope this doesnt mess up anything, tomorrow is gonna be a happy day. the next day is the formal, and I have the opportunity to show this school that even those who are rivals can become chill even in the midst of the old laws. i need to get to class so that way no one suspects anything.

you made it to potions and smiled slightly as hermione was sitting beside your seat. draco had followed you inside. you knew that hermione could feel the happiness flowing out from you.

You were the one person that Hermione could trust and likewise her for you. But it was now to your surprise that she passed you her notebook with a few simple words on it.

"Draco won't stop glancing at you. His pupils dilate when he stares at you. It's like he is mentally undressing you or something..."

You reply back with a simple phrase.

"he I'm sure is just removing a few layers, back to when we were in london and we went swimming in a private pool. We made out for hours. Now we will discuss this later."

you slid her back her notebook and both of you paid attention as snape decided to begin his lesson with a pop quiz type thing, you and hermione being the 2 smartest witches in the room decided to let the other students have a chance to answer the questions.

Snape: yn tell me what is the common use of wolfsbane?

YN: wolfbane used to sedate or subdue a werewolf. it is also known as acanite or commonly found in the form of a blue flower, it is in some cases a rare find.

Snape: and how exactly does one give wolfsbane to the werewolf?

YN: it has to be while its human, most times wolfsbane is used to snuff out the werewolves in human form before its too late.

snape: i would like each of you to take one of these flowers and for the next class prepare to brew me some wolfsbane if you wish to pass. now before the end of class today copy down the board, we will be studying wolfsbane for the next week.

you went to your notebook and copied down the board. it was very distracting when you knew your boyfriend was stealing glances at you... this made it very hard to concentrate.

you wrote a note on your notebook and slid it to your cousin...

“im getting antsy, cuz i am really anxious...”

she replied with the typical responce.

“dont worry girl, im sure you both will have your alone time later... think about it this way, in 2 years you will be able to marry and there will be nothing anyone can say to stop you.”

you had to internally laugh...

“me married can you imagine that... god if i know much more about that than you do... by the way i am so nervous to see what is in that box... like what if it doesnt bring the correct appeal...”

you sighed as your cousin wrote her responce.

“chill girl, your gonna rock that formal... now finish your notes so you can get out of here and be with your man.”

You smiled as you finish your notes and wait for Snape to dismiss the class. You stared at the ceiling for a few moments trying to keep a cool head.

Snape: alright those who finished the notes can leave a few moments early, those who haven't you have 5 minutes to finish those notes.

You and Hermione got up and walked out of the class, you walked by where Draco was sitting you had used a slight of hand to slip him a note.

You knew he would read it after class, you also knew he would thank you for it later. But you and Hermione took off and walked back to the court yard.

Where you both parted ways you both had picked a random slot for your separate ways. You were off to the quidditch tent to prep for the upcoming Christmas match, Hermione headed to divination.

You were one of those few captains who would take half a period out of your entire day to spend it preparing for a match that was a week and a bit away.

You had to come up with a strategy that would knock your match out of the water. you could feel something strange something abnormal as you stood in the tent.

the earth began to quake, the tent came down on your head before you could move out of the way.... you were covered in tent, and one of the tent pole was on you too heavy to move.

you held your wand up...

YN: periculum!

you sent the sparks and then passed out. you knew someone would possibly come find you. you had to have faith, you had too believe that one person above all others would see it.

meanwhile, hermione had bumped into draco in the hall on the way to divination, she told draco that she last saw you in the courtyard... draco and hermione then saw the sparks. both of them went to find any professor they could cause that was the rules.

they ended up spying mcgonigal, running up to her in a hurry they approach her with the news of the sparks.

mcgonigal: miss granger, mr malfoy come with me we will investigate this immediately.

the 3 of them hastely rushed toward the sparks, seeing the collapsed tent on arrival, mcgonigal waves her wand and sets the tent right, they all went inside and foudn you there after.

mcgonigal transported herself plus you draco and hermione to the hospital wing. madame pomfry immediately got involved, she was pushing everyone back... but the only person who had to leave was minerva.

hermione and draco now remained in the room to wait whether and when you would wake. your body had gone into a state of shock, the pole had bruised you a bit and thanks to the miracle potion that madame pomfry had administered to you, you were healing nicely.

hermione: come on girl, come on we still have to rock this formal, come on please wake up come on cuz... we both need you to wake up.

draco: don't you dare leave me, you can't, we haven't had any time. Come on YN wake up, open your eyes. We need to have our day in the sun! I need you to open your eyes so we can live our future together our way.

Madame pomfry heard what Draco said deciding not to say anything she just came back round to your bed side and administered a second dose of medicine.

Madame pomfry: take a bed each of you. Get some sleep, you both will be alerted first when she wakes. Try not to worry she will pull through she is a extraordinary girl.

Draco took a bed near you, Hermione took one on the other side of you. They wanted to be the first people's you saw when you woke up.

They tossed and turned but eventually both fell asleep. it was 8 hours later that an announcement rang through the school...

Minerva: attention students the quidditch field is off limits due to an investigation of recent events. someone brought the tent down on ravenclaw Yn. note that the perpetrator who is responsible if a student will be immediately expelled and sent to the ministry to await trial. we take this seriously. please be sure to make good notes for your fellow classmate as she is soon recovered in the hospital wing thanks to madame pomfry, classes go on as scheduled and the formal is still happening, thank you for your attention.

both draco and hermione sat up a few moments after at the sound of your groans. they both looked at you in time for you to open your eyes.

hermione: YN...

Draco: YN... your ok!

madame pomfry walked in at that moment as well to see you sit up.

Madame Pomfry: YN your awake wonderful how are you feeling.

YN: like i was hit by a unexpected brick wall what happened?

madame pomfry: you were found under the collapsed quidditch tent, you were brought to me bruised and unconcious. these 2 were among those who found you. you are pretty lucky you werent seriously injured. your bruising has gone down, you will stay in here for a few more hours then you can go back to your dorm. it is my recommendation that you get plenty of rest and then you go to the formal tomorrow and take it easy... your cousin will be allowed to stay with you tonight so she can make sure you get the rest you need.

now that madame pomfry had come to see you hermione got off the cot she slept on and came to hug you... you flinched a bit but returned her embrace, Draco approached from the other side and touched your shoulder.

hermione let go of you as she went to madame pomfry and began asking her for a written report for hermione to deliver to professor McGonagall. while both hermione and madame pomfry werent looking Draco came to sit on the edge of your bed, he smiled lightly...

Draco: you are awake. i was so worried about you.

YN: strange thing is i dont recall the tent coming down. i remember being in there working on my strategy for the christmas exhibition match, when the earth shook and thats when everything went dark. i wasnt even done when everything happened. i am so sorry i worried you.

Draco: you are such a brave girl, im very lucky to have you on my arm and by my side. i love you YN.

YN: i love you too. now go do me a favor and take a shower and change your robes. no offense my love but you need to take a shower.

Draco: i will take your advice... ill see you in a while. and ill have your homework...

Draco took his leave to go take a shower and change his robes before class. he went to class but his mind was not completely there. the professors had already gathered a stack of notes for you, so while draco attended the classes he couldnt focus. that was not a good thing, especially for his grades.

but the professors understood, for they all knew he clearly had other things going on, for at this time you and draco were out to the school. no one questioned why draco wasnt fully paying attention, they just hoped you would be okay.

a few hours passed, hermione brought you your casual dress to get you back to the dorm. as your fellow students watched you and hermione walk back to the dorms. you smiled slightly at draco who just watched you in passing like any normal rivalry.

the next few hours were spent with different people coming in to do different shifts of watching you, helping you, taking care of you. finally it was the tutoring time. you were told to be on bed rest, but when hermione didnt return to the dorm you figured she had arranged something.

Draco knocked at the door before he entered. once he came into view he was entranced by how stunning you looked sitting there, with your pet cat in your lap. (*yes okay yes i realize that this is the first time i mention the reader’s pet... sue me i forgot about that part till just now.*)

YN: hey.

Draco: i brought you the notes and stuff from classes. YN i feel so awful about what you went through i....

thats when you placed your finger to his lips this shut him up immediately.

YN: its not your fault, there was nothing you could have done. i went to the tent it was my choice. please i dont want you to blame yourself for what happened. lets just focus on the formal. now i want to thank you for the box... and before you say that it isnt from you or that you have no idea what im talking about. the magic signature on the card on the box belonged to you love. i havent looked inside, but i know that when i show up at the formal im gonna look absolutely smashing.

Draco: i have to use the money my father sends me somehow, so i went to the shop, and i picked everything out with the measurements that i got from hermione of course. plus it matches us a bit... anyway, here are the notes i had a few questions i knew you could help me solve. snape wants me and you to be among the first to brew the wolfsbane. he says it will be a easy task or at least for you it will be. he also said that you need to submit your formula on wolfsbane by fire message before the end of the day.

You quickly did that as Draco said it, he looked at you with curious concern in his eyes. he stayed with you for a few hours explaining what happened in the classes you missed. handing you the assignments, letting you explain what he didnt understand.

*TIME SKIP: the rest of that evening went by pretty quick, you spent time tutoring Draco, who left when your cousin walked back into the room. you were now spending time chattering with her over the hair styles for the formal the next day. well you and hermione got an early sleep for the next day would sure be a busy one. now we go to the showers where you have just arrived to stretch out and begin your day.*

you were in your stall, mulling things over under the hot water. your brain swimming with thousands of thoughts, ones that made you begin humming, something you do quite often and in different situations you hum different songs. in this case it was something celtic something haunting some sort of ancient melody that haunts your very soul.

your hum echoed through the castle. no one could figure out where the sound was coming from except your cousin. for she had heard you hum that tune many numerous times before.

Hermione: so you thinking again?

you snapped out of your hum, for you had not realized that another person could have walked into the room, never mind your own cousin.

YN: just got some butterflies about tonight... H what if this doesnt go the way we think it will...

Hermione: well cuz if you think about it this way, people will expect the rivalry to still take place during the event no one will expect the rivalry to be non existant during the event. to see 2 people who arent normally friends acting like friends even if for one night will do us all proud. now hurry up so we can go open the box to see what your man gave you...

YN: ah yes thank you for reminding me cuz, thank you for giving draco the information he needed to get these things for me.. i appreciate it a ton.

Hermione: no to worry cuz you are gonna look beautiful. now hurry up or you will look like a prune...

you finished cleaning up, you dryed off and wrapped up in your housecoat to go back to your dorm. twas the only way you were comfortable. your cousin right beside you both of you discussing your hair and what the hell you would do with it.

Hermione and you now sat in your dorm and just stared at the box between you both, the blue box that had tormented you for 2 days now sat between you ready for the unveiling of what lay inside.

you removed the note and slowly undid the ribbon binding the box shut. you reached down to ope the lid, the first thing you saw was the dress, picking it up you stood spinning around holding the dress against your form.

YN: remind me to thank him for this...

hermione: oh im sure just wearing this tonight will thank him enough for this. now come on lets see what else is in here…

you lay the dress over your cousins lap as you reach into the box and pull out a fashion wrap…

YN: isnt this basically just a cape?

Hermione: yes it is but we dont speak of that… lol it is nice and it looks like it goes in matching with the dress.

you lay that as well over your cousins lap and pull out a small bag.

YN: wnder what this is…

Hermone: well it must be valuable in order to require its own packaging inside of packaging,

you ope the baggie to reveal a custom bracelet.

Hermione: ive seen those before, you can get it engraved with whatevr you want particularly used for couples.

you flip it over and look at the enraving, “Yn & Draco always and forever 08-22”

you smiled ear to ear, little giggles left your lips, happily of course as you attached the bracelet to your wrist. once it was attached you reached into the box to pull out the next item again another baggie a bit bigger than the last. you opened it to reveal a gold headband.

YN: so he is gona treat me like a queen

Hermione: at least i dont have to worry about you.

YN: but you still will anyway cause thats just how you are cuz!

hermione: come on girl whats the last thing in the box.

You reach into the box and pull out a pair of leather strap short heals and smile.

Hermione: lets become fabulous. cause we all know thats a crime in itself but we have 5 hours before we have to be there for presentations and plus the rivals have the first dance as is in the announcement this year.

you had forgotten that the ministry had made that announcement… since fudge was supposed to make an appearance at the dance. He wanted to see the rivals of the school have the honor of first dance. It was a new tradition and would remain so for generations to come.

First was to get dressed. You went behind the change cover, you put on your strapless and a nice pair of seamless bottoms. You were now ready for the dress, but you realized that there was a bra built into the dress already. Well at least into one part of it. ****A/N: yes i know that this wasnt mentioned but the dress that im describing is a two piece, it was one i had done my research on and liked the way it looked in the color scheme i was using for this story. Okay back to the story.****

You removed your strapless as now you knew you didnt need it. You pulled on the skirt fiestas to make sure that you were good in that department. You kinda did a half twirl and then put on the top, well you couldnt do it up as the zipper was at the back.

YN: hey cuz, can you zip me up?

Hermione: a zipper… how does it look

YN: its a 2 piece… its in my house color, its soft fabric it feels soft against my skin.

Hermione: well come out and hold yourself in place.

You stepped out from behind the shield and watched your cousin turn around in her dress. You both squealed in happiness for it made you both happy to know that you both looked amazing! Hermione did your top up and both of you stood side by side in the mirror.

Hermione: cuz we need to photo shoot this in the mirror, we are still sure of this plan, we are so certain that this is the night the school will accept the possibility of a union between you and draco. I mean when are you guys planning to tell everyone about your relationship anyway.

YN: no idea, it hasnt been discussed to much, we know we need to tell everyone we just dont know when or how. But when we do it will be a big event. Alright on a different note ive set the mirror to do the photo shoot of us its taking 5 very precisely timed shots. So lets wing it. Nice one first so we can duplicate it and send it to our folks then we go from there.

Pose 1: normal, side by side and looking your best.

Pose 2: charlies angels, missing an angel but smiling anyway

Pose 3: the shocked first look in outfit (hermione shocked at seeing you)

Pose 4: parting the sea, back to back looking away

Pose 5: and finally the hug it out moment

You went round to the window to stare down at the world, the school looked all decorated for the formal and the sound of people gathering around the grounds, the concorse full of people and visitors. You strapped on your shoes and your cousin finished your hair and applied your wrap.

you wondered how the night would look, you wondered if anyone would question the less amounts of tension between you and Draco.

You wondered alot of things but a knock at the door brought you back to earth. You turned to see Harry and Ron standing at the door.

Harry: wow, ladies you both look amazing!

You and Hermione smile as Harry hands you something from minerva

Yn: it's professor McGonagall she wants to see me, says it's of great importance.

Hermione: that's okay I'll walk down with the boys. Go go…

You walk out of the room and go as fast as possible without tripping and falling to where you knew the professor would be.

Minerva: ah YN you look lovely..

Yn: thank you professor, I got your note you wanted to see me.

Minerva: yes as you may have heard by now this year the Minister of magic is attending the formal as a honored guest, he has requested that you and Mr malfoy be honored guests as your rivalry is legendary as well as you and Mr malfoy will be receiving something special from the minister. He wants to commend you both on jobs well done this year. Your main task for the dance is to start the dancing off, now i know that you are a little sensitive YN so if you need a minute to process this before we make the announcement and before your fellow classmates begin to gather.

YN: ya could i actually have a minute… where do i enter from?

Minerva: you will enter from the right side of the staircase, mr malfoy will enter from the left, just be there and ready for the announcement.

You went round to the right side of the staircase and began pacing, letting your brain sort itself out to be able to go out there and not kiss Draco in front of everyone.

To not run straight into his arms, to be able to just be a boy and a girl with no connection other than their rivalry for one night.

That Un be known to you would be the case on this night you would be just a girl, and Draco would just be a boy who would be spending time together during the formal.

Draco (to self): OK tonight can not go wrong, it's just one night to be just a boy and just a girl. I know she is probably nervous but she will be her normal brilliant self, i will be charming and pleasant and this evening will take the rivalship between me and YN to an 11. I hope she isnt overthinking things.

You on the other side of things were overthinking everything that could go right and everything that could go wrong. You were also talking to yourself and pacing and borderline freak out.

YN(to self): i cant do this, i can do this… what am i saying tonight is gonna go horrible… something is gonna mess this night up and screw up the entire eco system that is a almost 2 year secret… i wonder what it would be like if draco and i were out to the school and the public eye as a couple… what am i saying that would be a disaster. The ministry, the school, my parents, his parents, our friends, everyone would reject us… we would end up living as muggles for the rest of our lives, we would be exiled from the wizard records, we would have our legacy dragged through the dirt or worse.

That's when you heard Dracos voice in the wind.

Draco: don't stress babe, I'll be right by your side the entire time, trust me babe… Then we will happily go outside for some air later. Now let's get ready… and don't worry about a thing love.

Thats when you had calmed down a bit more, and listened to mcgonigal speak.

Minerva: settle down everyone, before we all enter the great hall, it gives me great pleasure to introduce 2 people who im sure need no introduction, their rivalry is legendary amongst the entire student body. The minister himself asked that these 2 be given a very special entrance, ladies and gentlemen to kick off tonights winter formal i proudly present YN and Draco.

That was yours and Dracos cues to walk out from cover and down the stairs. All eyes were on the 2 of you as you both united in the center between the 2 staircases.

Draco: in all my years at hogwarts never have I ever been so lucky in all I do, for my rival and I we know that we will make hogwarts proud in all we do and one day who knows maybe we will end up teaching here as well one day. But our rivalry won't end with graduation or parting for one final time. You all shall hear of our rivalry far and wide as we continue the rivalry even outside of hogwarts. Sorry for the speech slur but I figured on behalf of all of us we should make a statement.

Draco then held his arm for you to take. That you did and both of you walked the rest of the steps together, the only person who you both stopped to acknowledge was the minister.

Fudge: in all my time as minister for magic, i have never seen 2 people who just go from rivals one minute to just pleasant normal students, almost like the bond of your rivalry has brought you both closer together. Tell me YN did you ever see yourself and mr malfoy here being friends maybe.

YN: i honestly can say no i have not seen that possibility but there is an ever changing future and i look forward to seeing what it may hold, if per chance one day this rivalry of ours becomes obsolete we will im sure become the best of friends, as long as that would be viewed as a good thing in the eyes of the ministry of course.

Fudge: friendship is never an issue… now let the formal commence, music…

You and draco walk onto the dancefloor, you both had not danced outside of the astronomy tower before you both were unsure of how to act.

Draco placed one hand on your waist and one hand on your hand. The music started and you both began to move with the music, but no one would be able to hear your conversation….

Draco: you look wonderful tonight…

YN: thank you, i mean it wasnt hard to figure out who sent these wonderful items, but that was also a given considering we talk one minute about the formal and the fact i didnt have anything to wear and the next minute there is a mysterious box with a note saying that the dress and stuff was in the box made me smile. I figured it out when i saw the box, before i read the note.

Draco: was it that obvious?

YN: yes it was but thats ok, cause i know that tonight we arent rivals, we are just 2 people who happen to be a big part of the school and its events. I honestly didnt know that this was what we had to do till i got mcgonigals note.

Draco: well tonight will be special i promise.

YN: ill hold you to it.

Draco just smiled as more people joined you on the dancefloor, after a few songs you and Draco went to get something to drink. You both picked a table and sat down beside eachother, so as to have a civizled conversation.

Draco: any plans to go home for break?

YN: nope, as far as my parents are concerned i am staying at the school and just helping minerva… its not like i have much at home anyway. I mean sure my parents are there and they love me but i dont want to go home, see my parents start getting back into my home life routine and then have to come back to hogwarts… its just too hard. Thats why i stopped going home for break, thats why i stay here and help the professors keep the school over break.

Draco: well what would you say if i stay here as well over break… think of it as we are on one continuous date for 2 weeks.

YN: now that i would enjoy. But i think we should tell the school… somehow… someway… but we shouldnt wait too much longer, we dont know what the consequences will be…

Draco: i know you are right… i…

Just as he was about to speak again the minister came up to both of you pulling up a seat beside you…

Cornielious: having a good time tonight…

YN: yes we are minister thank you… we were just discussing what the tutoring schedule will look like over the next bit before our owls and winter break.

Draco: are you having a good time minister?

Cornielious: its like nothing has changed at hogwarts, this party is fantastic, it is a good time, it also gives me a break from my work at the ministry.. Oh YN your mom and dad said to say hi… i have them checking into a few strange occurrences for magic bursts.

YN: well you certainly picked the right people for the job, i know my parents well enough to know that they wont quit a case if there are no leads… as my mom always the hardest case is the easiest case for the answer is staring you in the face.

All 3 of you start laughing as the music changes again and one student exclaims…

Student A: its snowing!!!

All the students continued to dance as the music changed to more slow songs, you and draco decided to try to slow dance again. But no one would have predicted the scene that would happen about quarter way into the dance.

You were having a small convo with draco and he decided to kiss you on the cheek. No one else noticed, your cousin however smart and brilliant for she non vocally slowed time a bit to the point of you and draco could recover and pretend that it didnt happen.

But a few students and teachers noticed… this made you go bright red, you backed away from Draco and turned to run through the crowd, grabbing your cape and going out the doors down the stairs and into the rose garden.

Time resumed but no one said anything, all they saw was you running out of the great hall and draco standing in the center of the dance floor. Hermione started to move toward the door but saw draco run after you… he realized he made a mistake. She went to explain to the professors what happened and the dance was resumed.

Draco followed your footprints and got into the maze… he located you in the center of the maze, he was very careful to approach. But you were already aware that he had followed you.

YN: no need to be cautious, i know you are there…

Draco came fully round the corner and became visible as he appeared in front of you.

Draco: im so sorry about that in there love. It was… well i just…. I mean…

YN: its okay i understand what happened… heat of the moment and all. But as my cousin has told me telepathically of course is that she has spoken to those who saw this happen and she told them that it was nothing special. It was just a simple slip of the moment. But she harry ron and crab and goyle all know the truth… one day we will tell the rest of the students and the professors but for now…

Thats when he threw a snowball at you… well now he had started something, this fight went on for a few moments before you realized that he was close enough to you & that you guys were still alone and that no one would know if you shared a moment under the falling snow…

YN: tonight just being normal was amazing! Thank you so much for this…

Draco: there is one more thing i feel like we should do… one thing that we are gonna do to remember this moment, how we looked on the floor and for anyone that wants a memory of tonight, i know i will and i know our friends will but we also need to start making memories for our children to see one day… so here is one for the history books...

You didnt have time to respond before he kissed you. the snow falling on your faces and the calm night air made this night even better to just be there together.

~to be continued~

#obxmermaidholiday

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tayyibesteatutorials · 4 years

Text

Of Herbs, Crowns and Soot

Decided to share this here ‘cuz my ccount got deleted lol thank you brain. Enjoy, friends. :D

During the 19th century London, Harry Potter falls down the chimney of one Severus Snape, bringing him with him dire inconviniences.

A Severitus and Snape study story, one without magic.

Chapter One - Down the Chimney Hole

Harry Potter was highly unusual in many ways. For one, he didn’t have to live in an orphanage, despite his parents being dead. For another, he really wanted to go to school, but he had to focus on earning his keep with the Dursleys: Uncle Vernon, Aunt Petunia and his cousin Dudley. And he also happened to be a chimney sweep’s apprentice.

It was nearly dawn and Harry and his fellow climbing boys -and girl- were sleeping black. The cloth and sacks Master Edwin used to capture fallen soot draped over them, bodies shaking nonetheless from the cold seeping through the dirty cellar floor.

Harry untangled himself from the heap of bodies first. Treading with care as not to wake anyone up, feet unsteady. He shivered. Wrapping his jacket around him for warmth, eyeing his friends with their rising and falling bodies with a glint in his eyes. Tempting. So very tempting. But Master Edwin would come soon. Shrill voice jolting them awake and among the hustle, Harry would miss the opportunity to wash up, be late and suffer Edwin’s wrath.

What would Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia say when Master Edwin complained to them? Hurtling Harry back home and declaring him useless? Uncle Vernon wouldn’t take his small physique as an excuse and no doubt throw him out. Screaming that no sissy boy deserved to be housed under his roof.

He shuddered again, not cold, and when he was ready enough the lofty steps of Edwin’s boots echoed behind the door. A momentary fumbling of keys and the wood hurled open, smashing against the wall with enough force to wake the others.

And if that wasn’t enough to stir the heaviest of sleepers (namely Oliver), the ragged shouting certainly was.

“Wake up, ‘ye useless clotpoles!” Erwin boomed, snatching the blanket from over the boys. Draping the fabric and sacks over his soot-stained jacket while the five others withdrew with sharp flinches. Sleep induced and tripping over their feet in the result, they scurried off to the morning routine none were too pleased to share.

For once, Harry -almost thirteen and not showing it- watched. Sight a blur of shapes and shadow. Running wild like the thoughts in his mind. Another day. Another sun. And Harry Potter has woken once more to the void in his chest eating away the heart he prided himself to have. Oldest he might be, to these children… a brother that they didn’t have and the hope they would better be without… but the light from life was starting to dim for him after all. Oliver… Little Joe and the only girl, Marie-Lue... All lined beside him, ash and dark and clothes that were never meant to be theirs.

Another clench of his heart and Harry faced forward.

Edwin, scowling in the face Edwin, took them in with a grunt. Eyes narrowed. Searching for a toe out of line, as the thought bolted in their minds , “That all of you?” he asked, adjusting his cap.

Harry nodded, curtly, and only because the rest did not. Clenching his jaw hard enough to rattle his teeth, Harry allowed the man his petty fun of spitting at their feet. The hands clasped behind his back jarring his skin, drawing angry gashes over the ones already lining them.

"A'ight. Off with you all, then," Edwin said, banging his cane against the metal rails. Making small Marie, only six, flinch and duck her head. Launching for Harry's hand when Edwin marched up the steps, head ducking to get past the door when his hat almost fell off.

Despite himself, despite what he told everyone in the business, Harry squeezed back. Hard flesh against Marie's soft, innocent skin snagged by two weeks of labour. Tears already forming, trails against red skin. The disappointment Harry had to learn to leave behind as not to stagger. As to win. As to earn his keep.

As to earn the love that he now doubted he deserved to have.

London, on this summer morning, wore fresh fog. Cold fumes, dirty and from the mines and factories. The ones the adults assumed as progress and what the children assumed as early death. Harry squeezed again, against better logic. Meeting Oliver's eye -the second oldest- and shaking his head. Oliver raised a brow and turned back around. And left. Left him all alone. Fending for the girl, whimpering and weak when he wasn't anything more.

When the cart, a feverish clutter of dark shapes appeared, Harry tugged, pulling the girl closer. Eyes lifting from under the cap to eye Edwin, now smoking Edwin, and leant down to her ear.

"Marie," he whispered, sharp as winter snow, "You have to stop crying."

Marie sniffled, shaking her head. She lifted an arm, wiped her eyes. Fast and fuming, though not scared, "I want to go home. To mummy and daddy."

Mummy and daddy. The words winked from the corners of nightmarish nights. Glinting in the stars that sang of them, rose for others. Harry risked another look. This time Oliver nodded in his stead and Harry sighed. When he stopped walking, Mary slammed against his back.

Her fingers lifted. Cradling the bridge of her nose, now tutted red and glanced up. Slow and trembling. The wind sweeping loose strands of black, once blond and no more the silk it used to be. Harry’s hair wasn’t much the same. Reddish-black now soothed dark and rough under the cap.

Harry lifted a single finger to his lips, light brown and not from the soot, "We have to stop crying. Alright, Marie? Your-" he bit on his lips, blinking hard, "Your Mummy and Daddy aren't here... yet. So you must- you have to... you should be strong, yeah? You're a strong girl. Mummy and Daddy want little girls to be strong because everyone loves strong little girls," he whispered, standing up and tugging on her hand, walking faster to keep up.

Marie-Lue sniffed. Wiping the soiled tears from her eyes -brown, doe eyes- and looked up when they stood in line to get on the carriage, "Will Mummy and Daddy love me when I'm strong?"

Harry stared. Stared until Edwin was behind him. A hand smacking down on his neck, ripping off his cap and barking at his face. Smoke and spit coiled around Harry's nose. Taking most of the willpower Harry had to not scrunch.

He bent down for his cap. Thanking Marie-Lue by lifting her into the carriage for finding it, he jumped on. He took the seat at the very end for his tardiness and Marie-Lue cuddled to his side, rubbing her head against his chest. The others watched. Harry watched them back. Little Joe and Oliver... David and Rory and Harry number two (or as they called him Mums, since he never talked), all small and searching. All learnt of affection here, or the lack thereof. Not to look for it. Not to search for it. Keep the yearning inside you, where it won't come to harm you.

And still, yearn you would.

The carriage jolted. The children jolted with it. The driver's whips sliced the air, earning a shrill whine from the 'beast' that didn't look like it could pull anything but its own weight.

"Harry," Marie whispered, only six and so small, "Will they come back for me if I'm strong?"

A family walked in his mind. Happy and laughing. A woman wearing dark blue robes and a man wearing a suit, smart and something Harry saw behind the glass one freezing Christmas two years back. Getting a shaky look before the tailor chased him out, screaming about how Harry would scare off customers. He only found him because Harry had left his soot in the snow. Betraying him in the ally where he lied, frozen and beaten with blood in his teeth.

Bad Christmas. But he'd seen his parents there and begged to join them. In his mind, his mother black-haired and kind-eyed. His father red-haired and green-eyed and only because he once saw a heard of red-heads and their own father in town. Poor, not well off but happy all the same. Happy. And Harry would doubt Aunt Petunia in these instances. How poverty, while making those five children happy, made Harry Potter's parents leave him on his Aunt's doorstep one summer night.

One summer night almost twelve years ago, and even now Aunt Petunia refused to say anymore.

And Harry wouldn't either.

He cleared his throat. The girl, only a girl, looked up and returned Harry's smile, though it didn't resemble the grimace on Harry's face, "We'll pray for it."

"Every night?"

"Every night."

"Will you teach me?"

Harry paused and looked up. Oliver regarded him with narrow eyes and crossed brows. The look Harry had become better at ignoring over the years.

And ignore he did.

"I will. I promise. We'll pray... we'll pray for a family."

Marie nodded. Harder than necessary and held up a curled pinky finger, "And for food. Yummy food, like in the big town."

Harry opened his mouth. David, eight years old, talked instead, "And clothes."

Rory, ten and a half, "And a warm house!"

Mums, who communicated with hands alone, clasped his hands and faked sleep, winking at them when the rest fell into soft laughter.

Well, most of them anyway. Little Joe joined in, despite not having said anything but Oliver stood stern. Cocking his head when Edwin -bastard Edwin- twisted his neck with nasty threats of no dinner. Took Harry and Marie-Lue with a look that promised far more and turned back to the front with a grunt.

Harry heard the curse. But smiled at Marie. Only Marie. Taking her finger with his own and shook, a deal well made. An oath well earned, "I promise, Marie."

And Marie grinned with hope Harry had lost. She hugged with strong arms. Warm and still alive, and her breath fell soft and steady while Harry watched her closed eyes. Tufting a strand away from her face, Harry leaned back on the wood. Pulling his jacket tighter around himself, against the summer wind that sang of winter. Of sleep. Of today.

The today masked by tall, grey buildings that swam in hasty shapes. Tall and beautiful and alive. Parents and children and families that were warm and not some wind to jolt them out of a dream that wasn't real. Just them, and warm fires and someone's presence to look forward to. Despite the cold. Despite the fog. And no matter what London or England could be, a family it would stay.

He frowned.

And then Harry prayed.

London, for all it's worth, was less grime and more stares. And climbing down from the carriage in an unfamiliar neighbourhood was always foreign and strange. Edwin called them all identical. So did Harry, with the shapes and colours so familiar in his eyes that he needed someone to tell him which house was which when Edwin wasn't looking.

Taking one large sheet over his shoulder, Edwin turned to the street. Cupping a hand over his mouth and shouting with a voice no longer raspy, "Soot- Oh, Sweep!" over and over until there were at least two people peekeing through their blinds, their curtains closing just as quick when they caught sight of them.

Edwin clearly didn't mind being at the receiving end of the glares from the residence. Or he was good at hiding it. Or that these particular glares weren't as bad, seeing as most the buildings here belonged to tradesmen and shopkeepers, judging by the signs that lined over the brick architecture.

"A'ight," Edwin turned to the line of children. Dropping a pale sheet over each of their arms, he swept a look over each of them as he passed, the only black eye on his face seizing up Harry when he stopped in front of him, "You come with me."

And with a sharp jab to his chest, Harry followed. Not sparing a glance behind him, Harry squared shoulders. Throwing the worn sheet over his shoulder and stuttering to the sidewalk.

Harry's feet shuffled on the cobblestone. Cold, due to the holes in the soles and the socks that thinned to strings. Edwin didn't look behind him. Grumbling now and again to a passerby, complaining about their dress or shoes or the riches they most likely possessed and Harry was once again reminded of Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia. They too took great pleasure in gossip and complaint, sneering at anyone who looked to be better off them in any detail. Gloating over the souls that were unfortunate enough to have the little they didn't. Though, Harry couldn't call their assets little. With their servant and three large bedrooms and the kitchen that never seemed to lack food, they certainly weren't poor. And taking in Harry at a young age and keeping him in the cupboard under the stairs and rarely feeding him could hardly diminish their wealth. Especially when Dudley's birthday gifts showed a visible accumulation over the years.

Harry, called back from his daydream by bumping against Edwin's back, looked up. Ducking his head at Edwin's scowl, he shuffled his weight from one foot to the other. Nodding when Edwin barked at him to wait outside. His ears pricking at the sound of the bell, though his eyes did not falter from the cracked stone on the ground. Interesting stone it was. Grey, dark and not ugly like Edwin. Harry leaned against the glass, crunching the pebbles with his toes.

His breath swirled in a white mist over his mouth and nose. Unsteady. Breaking. And his fascination lasted the three minutes Edwin spent inside before he was dragged in. Arm burning even after Edwin let go.

The shop, in question, was warm. Not the uncomfortable warm that lasted two rare days of summer. Or the chimneys he climbed with their suffocating heat. No, this warmth was tender. This warmth smelled sharp of herbs and teas and flowers he didn't know. Of medicines terrible and strange that reminded him of... well, he wasn't sure.

But it smelled of home.

Either way, Harry made sure to keep his head down. Made sure that his eyes, green and not to everyone's liking hid behind his cap. Stay out of sight. If you can't, stay silent. Be the next best thing and keep still. Mummys and Daddys only like quiet, obedient kids, don't you know Potter? Not some scrawny dark-skinned boy with knobbly knees. Harry nodded, reluctant. But the voice in his head disappeared all the same. Leaving behind a chuckle and a slap on his neck.

Harry sputtered. And then met the eyes of the client.

Black, piercing, angry. Dressed all in black and a not someone Harry would like to meet on a midnight traverse. And though Harry's eyes dropped the black shirt, the man's did not. Continuing to listen to Edwin with his eyes not lingering.

"We settled on the price, then?"

"I suppose it's an adequate amount, in return for your, ah deliverance," the man said, smooth but snide, and Harry's head lifted in surprise. Breath jerking because the man was still looking and it wasn't what Harry would consider in his favour.

A moment of silence. Then, "This way, please. I had the chimney in the shop swept not a while ago. The same cannot be said for the one in my personal quarters and laboratory," and he led them around the brown oak counter to a door behind a shelf of jars and glass bottles. Opening the door that led a flight of stairs, shadow drawn and narrowed between two black walls.

Edwin cleared his throat, making the man turn around. His shoulder-length black hair falling curtain around his face,

"Eh, Mr Snape-"

"Professor Snape,"

Edwin clenched his fist, "Of course. Professor Snape. Do you want another worker for the second chimney, or would this lad be of use?"

For Professor Snape, the question must not have been an easy one. His brows knitted closer and the lean form hunched forward, long arms crossing over his chest.

And then the Professor did something that made Harry stagger down a step.

He kneeled to his height. Taking the arm that wasn't holding the brush and sheet. And with a touch that should not have been gentle, squeezed.

It was in no way familial. Nor parental and no matter how much the scent of the shop swirled the man, Harry told himself it wasn’t home.

He wasn’t home. But now, with his dark eyes soot-black and searching, Harry’s breath did hitch and his heart fell into an unsteady run. Fast, uneven and to his dismay, something the professor noticed. How he knew, Harry couldn’t say. But after that bony finger slithered to his wrist and pressed down, the professor knew.

The arched brow complemented his features. With those sharp and high cheekbones, and the lingering suspicion that the professor wasn’t just a professor bothered Harry. Not much, but enough to take another step back before he was cornered by Edwin. Snatching his wrist back, Harry rubbed the skin and faced away.

Professor Snape, quick to let go and quicker in gaining back his decorum, stood up. He clasped his hands behind him, and with a look positively bored, faced Edwin, “He will suffice, assuming that your...climbing boys clean more than a chimney per day.”

“Oh, yes. Mark me words, five and six if their luck. The economy as it is… Need some income, you know, not that you yourself-”

Professor Snape held out a hand. And Harry allowed himself to grin under his cap at the way Edwin’s face morphed into surprise and then rage.

“Yes yes. Very drastic. God bless the Queen. Now,” he then turned, resuming the rest of the climb, “If you’d follow me?”

They complied. But the sneer that pulled on Edwin’s lips couldn’t mean he was pleased. Harry could almost read the man’s mind, after spending four years with the man. Something between a scoff and a chuckle sounding from his lips when Edwin’s voice echoed in his mind. Complaining in a rigid voice, stomping over and over his mechanical brush while cursing at every professor that came to be.

He hid it, of course. Behind a cough and a grin bit back, just in time for Professor Snape to open the door (oak and dark) on the landing, giving way a large living area.

And it was nothing like Harry imagined.

A dark shadow followed Professor Snape. In the corner, in his heart. A shadow that sneered and scowled and growled like a beast and Harry assumed... well, it wasn't right to make assumptions. No. But with the warm chocolate walls, wooden tiles beneath multiple dark green carpets and furniture that was welcoming more than menacing, Harry could admit that his taste wasn't half bad. Sure, the space was small. With a chimney in the corner below layers of shelves and a long couch and single armchair, there wasn't much area left to the circular dining table and two chairs, as well as the kitchen area lining the opposite wall. All warm and colours of dull brown and green. Not wild, not snark but some comfort to his eyes nonetheless.

"You have a nice house," Harry said, soft, certain. Then immediately clamped a hand over his mouth when the man's head whirled around. Making dear Harry pinch the inside of his palm and avert his eyes.

A slap on the back of the head was Edwin's -cruel and disgusting Edwin's- response. Along with a hiss in the ear to behave while he apologised to the Professor, hands clasped together in apology, back bent.

Disgusting. And people thought the kid's kissed up to others.

Professor Snape waved a dismissed hand, one hand still behind his back, "I do not mind. Now, I'm a rather busy man. Hence I ask you to be quick about it, Mr Edwin."

"Yes yes. Of course," Edwin said, honeyed. Grabbing Harry around the cuff the next second and dragging him across the parlour to the well-furnished chimney. He kneeled down to his knees, bones groaning in protest. Grabbing hold of the metal long holder and removing it from the hearth. Then, he lifted up a hand and Harry passed him the white cloth. All the while the Professor sat in his armchair.

And watched.

Harry wasn't about to return the gesture. So while Professor Snape watched Edwin lay the cloth over the hearth, Harry watched the ornaments that lined over the mantelpiece. A few viles, dried flowers, a portrait of a young Professor Snape and a woman, and an antique table clock.

Edwin's voice rose him, and Harry was once more pushed forward. Stumbling and finding his support on the brick fireplace.

Professor Snape watched.

Professor Snape didn't say a word.

"Eh," Edwin cleared his throat, "Will you be here, Professor Snape?"

"Why yes. I find it impractical to leave children unsupervised, considerably so when dealing with... hazardous tasks."

"I's keeping 'em supervised, Professor."

Professor Snape's arched brow was nothing short of humiliating. Seizing Edwin in a mock question and doubt, "Whatever for?"

"...You're keeping him under lock and-"

Professor Snape held out a hand and Harry indulged himself in another grin at the pale-faced Edwin. Almost liking the man who was now crossing his slender legs, pants pulling high enough to share a glimpse of his black socks, "I shall endeavour to be abundantly clear. I am keeping the boy under supervision so I keep up my honour as a responsible man with proper moral. You, Mr Edwin, have a charge of children needing to be taken care of, to my precise knowledge, and no time to waste. The boy will do fine, and my chimney is in no rush."

"We always keep on the lookout, Professor Snape. We-"

"Are not in a shop your opinions are favoured, as I have made clear to every single sweeper to cross into my quarters. The boy alone, please. You may collect him in, hmm, on your way back from a neighbourhood that hasn't been cleaned just yesterday by another hoard of children."

These things happen, Harry told himself. Running a hand down the shelf, brows disappearing in his blob of hair when his finger came back dust-free. Some others were quicker. Sweeping the neighbourhood clean and making them search for another. Making the children grin while Edwin got scolded by the tenants of the houses. But never was it as fun as this.

"Whatever... whatever shall the boy do, when done with 'em both?"

Professor Snape rolled his eyes, "Ensnare me, Mr Edwin. Actually, no. Rather not. But I imagine that in an apothecary, there is enough work to humour a senile child. I am a busy man and having some additional aid would be much appreciated. Of course," he added, looking right into Edwin's eyes, a smirk twisting his lips, "You'll receive the payment necessary."

In a twist of fate called 'money', Edwin's crooked back straightened and Harry didn't even have the time to be offended at the word 'senile' before a nasty crack came from his spine, making Harry wince and Professor Snape's mouth twitch. Black eyes glaring at Edwin's hand, which was shaking the Professor's vigorously.

“That’s a deal if I’ve ever seen one,” Edwin said with a toothless grin and only Harry noticed the Professor wiping his hand on a handkerchief after he stood up and led them both to the door. But Edwin turned around just before disappearing. Back arched and on his toes to peek above the Professor's shoulder, a finger jabbing the air rather sharply.

“An’ don’ forget to buff it, boy!”

A muscle twitched near Harry’s eye. And when the door closed, masking the last of their ceasing steps, Harry rolled his eyes. Most adults in his life treated him in the same sense as the Dursleys and Edwin. Stupid, ignorant, arrogant, nuisance, burden… And a couple more which were less mundane. But stating the obvious to his face always got Harry’s blood pumping the worst of ways and anger was never slow to follow.

So when a cough from behind him interrupted him from striping from his pants, anger and surprise found themselves equally alive.

Professor Snape, already by the door, had his arms crossed. Scowl still in his face, though less at ease snapped, “What are you doing?” eyeing Harry's hands.

Harry frowned, “Buffing it, sir?”

“What?”

“It’s to go in nude, Professor,” Harry explained, patiently, like he supposed the Professor did at school. But when the scowl deepened, he grinned. Likely not, “It’s easier to clean that way. Less likely to get stuck.”

Professor Snape hummed while Harry got rid of the remainder of his clothes. Now a nasty pile beside the heath, Harry greeted the man with a mock salute before entering the hearth, heart already thumping wild. This was fine. He’d done this before. For years, since the day Uncle Vernon finally kicked him out of the house and Annabeth helped him pack his bag, tears in both their eyes, he’d done this before. No need to throw a tantrum now at the sight of the dark, narrow chute that could mean a possible death with a single wrong movement.

No need at all.

So Harry breathed. Readied himself by pulling up by the walls and climbed. Using his arms and legs, he hoisted himself up. His brush ridding the flue line of the black soot. Keeping his head down as to breath as little as the poisonous material into his lunges, body moving much like a caterpillar up the line.

Little help that did, Harry sneered. Over the years he’d spent, climbing chimney after chimney, always panic and little fun, the soot would get to him sooner or later. Suffocating him in an alleyway where nobody cared.

Little left to take his mind off things, Marie-Lue smiled at him in the darkness and their clasped fingers were close behind.

And then, Harry prayed.

Prayed for love. Prayed for a family.

Prayed for a mother and a father and wouldn’t a brother just be perfect? A little family away from the world, away from the soot that would care not because they had to because Harry was Harry and that was all he had to be.

Under the cap, no one heard him cry.

That was a harsh reality to live and when his head shot through the chute, another day alive, the wind bit at his cheeks and burned his lungs clean.

A harsh reality. An unfair life but Harry was always complaining, wasn’t he? And adults complained about their complaining and loved to remind them life wasn’t a silver platter and he would have to live his way through it.

There’s always a fine line between living and surviving.

Adults told him to live. Live in the only way he could: Survive.

Harry wanted to live, as the sun dawned upon the roofs. Silver and pale but nothing short of a sight when the bricks and steel glinted in the light of a new day. Harry wanted to live as he slipped back down, having enough of the London city tops starting to bustle with life.

Wanted to live when he was falling fast. Faster than he should have. Wanted to live when he regained his hold to cushion his fall, still fast but not fast enough to die.

Even when the Professor's face, wild with concern, danced in his view before finally, he closed his eyes.

Black as soot.

Peaceful as the night.

#severitus #severus snape #harry potter #fanfic #prosnape #snapedom #of herbs crowns and soot #my writing

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purplesurveys · 4 years

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655

Can you name a uniquely named crayon in the Crayola 64 pack? The one color name I have never ever EVER forgotten in the last 15 or so years I’ve been aware of Crayola 64, is macaroni and cheese. I used it a lot solely because of its name. Carnation pink was also pretty unique to me, and I remember being bothered as a kid as to why they didn’t just name it pink lmao. What kind of car did your parents have while you were growing up? We used to have a sky blue Mitsubishi Lancer that was around for a little over a decade. Do you tie your socks together or roll them up? I roll them up and put it in a ball. I am not aware that tying up socks is a thing. When's the last time you had peanut butter? Ooh, safe to say it was many months ago. I don’t really like peanut butter as a filling; I like peanut-butter flavored food more, but I haven’t had those in a while, either. What was your last bad date? It’s been a while. My girlfriend and I barely see each other, so we try not to fight in the 1-2 times a week that we get to hang out.

Do you ever wish your birthday was on a different day? In 2019 I certainly wished it was on a different day, because my birthday then was on the same day as Easter and none of my friends were available to celebrate with me – save for Angela who went great lengths to make sure she at least had dinner with me and made me feel less sucky. What holiday would you want to have your birthday on? I’d never want to have my birthday on a holiday again, if that last answer wasn’t clear enough. Have you ever gone snorkeling or scuba diving? I’ve gone snorkeling in Boracay and Palawan, and that one time we went on a beach trip for biology class in high school. I’ve never tried scuba diving, and I’m a little anxious to give it a shot if ever because I feel like it’s a little more complicated to follow than just snorkeling.

If yes, what's the coolest thing you've seen? Allow me to be a kid in answering this, because the genuinely coolest creatures I have ever seen are the Nemo and Dory kinds of fish :)))))) Do you sunburn easily? As a kid yes. They used to hurt a lot too. I don’t sunburn at all now but I do get very tan. What's your favorite filling in chocolates? Peanut butter. When's the last time you had a smore? Sometime in senior year of high school. I had a brief phase of liking smores, but then I ordered it too much and I got tired of it quickly. Have you read the Twilight series? More times than I could count. Does your best friend have any phobias? Not really a phobia but Gabie doesn’t like being in malls as they are closing because she gets scared of the sound of the roll-up doors getting pulled down. She says she feels like she’ll get trapped inside the mall hahaha. What's the last thing you said to your mom? I asked her if she wanted a kind of snack I know she likes, since I’ll be passing by the store that has them. Why couldn't you go to sleep the last time you were up all night? This doesn’t happen to me, fortunately. If I can’t sleep, watching YouTube videos while in bed would do the trick. What breed of dog do you find the most annoying? Fucking chihuahuas. I care for them whenever it’s necessary e.g. if I hear a story about an abused chihuahua, but in the grand scheme of things I do not like them at all. Do you prefer the taste of lemon or limes? Lemon. What do you think about Sarah Palin running for president in 2012? I don’t have much knowledge or opinion of politics of other countries. What would you name your firstborn son? I’d definitely insert a tribute to my significant other’s dad as a second name, but I’m still not 100% sure on a first name. Do you cook anything you don't like eating? I can’t even cook food that I do like, lmao. What's the last picture you colored? It’s a photo of a group of houses, which is a page in an adult coloring book that I own. Do you make out sentences out of the little Vday candy hearts? No. What is the cheesiest way a guy could propose marriage? Idk, anything can be cheesy/sweet as long as you pull it off.

Do you watch any reality shows on MTV or VH1? I never did. Would you have a better chance of surviving in the Sahara or Alaska? Sahara. I’m in a tropical climate, so I feel like I’d have some survival hacks somewhere hot. I don’t know how winter works at all, and what to prepare for it. When's the last time you pet a cat? Last night, when I played with the only kind cat in my college. Were you missing your front teeth as a child? My front teeth were the first ones to fall out, so for a time I was missing them, yes. They grew back after a few months though, as did my other teeth. Do you remember Eureka's Castle on Nick JR? I always encounter the title but I don’t think I’ve actually seen it or if it aired here at all. What's the last song you hummed to cuz you didn't know the lyrics? The new songs Hayley Williams put out AS A SOLO ARTIST!!!!!!!!!!!! that I have yet to memorize – Sudden Desire, Creepin’, and Cinnamon. What would you say is Paris Hilton's occupation? She’s a businesswoman. And a successful one at that, lmao. If you could have a body like any celebrity's, who would it be? Idk I don’t find myself wanting anyone’s figure. If you could have any celebrity's baby, who would it be? Now this is just creepy. Do you know anyone whose name starts with Sh? Yeah, I have an orgmate named Shealea, a co-member in the graduating batch committee named Shaira, and a high school batchmate named Shela. I’m sure there are more but they’re the first ones I remembered. What's the worst Christmas present you've ever received? I don’t rate my gifts from best to worst. I’ve loved all my gifts. Are you wearing a necklace? Nopes. Do you have any noticeable moles or birthmarks? I have a birthmark behind my left shoulder that’s visible when I’m wearing a sleeveless top, and a mole on my right arm. Is there a salon you religously go to for beauty care? No. Quite the opposite situation actually - I haven’t been to a salon since 2018 :/ Count to ten in another language. I know two other languages (Filipino and Korean), so I’ll just give both of theirs haha. Isa, dalawa, tatlo, apat, lima, anim, pito, walo, siyam, sampu; and hana, dul, set, net, daseot, yeoseot, ilgop, yeodeol, ahop, yeol. Do you feel uncomfortable telling friends they have boogers in their nose? Yeah, but I don’t encounter this situation a lot. What do you remember from sex ed class when you were younger? We weren’t given sex ed, we were just taught the female and male reproductive systems in Grade 5 and that was it. I didn’t know how babies were made until I was in Grade 6, and before that I just thought all women who got married got pregnant automatically, as if the body knows.

What's the first instrument you ever played? That I don’t necessarily know how to play? My best guess is the piano. My mom took photos of me when I was a year old playing the grand piano at my aunt’s house, so that was probably the first. Are you a mommy's child or daddy's child? Daddy’s girl, for sure. What's the last thing you wore around your neck? A lanyard holding my car keys. My ID used to be attached to the lanyard but I’ve since lost it, so now it’s my keys that hang from it. Would you ever eat rhino meat? Like once, just to try it out and because I’m more of an adventurous eater. Who do you think deserves an award? Me, after finishing the shitstorm that was last week lol. Have you ever had a friend break up with a bf/gf for you? No. Do you own any books with a red cover? Yeah. Chris Jericho’s second autobiography Undisputed is predominantly red.

#survey #surveys

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96xie · 4 years

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2019

a whole summary of this difficult year

2019 was full of unexpected good and bad surprises along with lessons and experiences.

january

spent good time with mocha, wayo and brian

had such a good time with guildies from our game

met up with some other ppl from the same game and didnt feel too good bc i was never good with crowds and/or groups that were already well established

tried tinder for the first time because i thought it would be nice to put myself out there for once

feburary

continued my tinder journey and actually had fun with it. it was pretty scary at the same time because it was such a new experience talking to other people and to have them notice you? because i always knew and felt that i wasnt really the desirable one.

actually hooked up with a guy from last months meetup and hung out twice. thought it was going somewhere because he, too, showed signs to progress further ((was wrong because he lied and showed red flags later))

one major red sign to me: no response after genuinely saying thank you for rides and dinner. im the type of person who always says thank you because im honestly grateful for the little and big things. he basically shrugged it off.

also, a huge liar. yah, big no

i brought him to my friends birthday bc they and himself wanted to meet each other, it was fun while it lasted but stuff happened

towards the end of the month, i cut my ties off with him for being awfully mean to me and also cut ties with my “friends” for having really bad assumptions of me.

i was frustrated with myself at that time bc his cats gave me a bad breakout and i felt super ugly. also i wasnt sad over him, but over the fact that i let myself be treated like a second option. eventually i learned that it was good that i didnt let things go further and that i only deserve the very best.

even though i was hurt, i thought it was a good experience, esp since i havent really been in the “dating game” for years. like it was a just a small step to putting myself out there once again

a week later after that a classmate asked me out and got tons of compliments from him and wondered “the universe really works in crazy ways”

march

met some cool people through the same mobile game on a discord server and they were much better than the first group.

also met this really funny dude in the same group. like he was so fun to talk to and he understood my dumb lingo

remember when my classmate asked me out on a date? it turned out a bit weird. but considering this was my first date in YEARS i thought it was a cool experience. got some carne asada fries outta him

i had the dude i was talking to call me so i could leave the date tho LOL ((he helped me lots, esp how to deal with awkward situations with my classmate. also at this point, i really liked talking to him but i wasnt rly sure if i wanted to date other guys bc i had been hurt previously)

this month was pretty much dedicating most of my time talking to him and i enjoyed it alot

also went to pubs for the first time to hangout with my coworkers. such an interesting place

april

tried rollerskating for the first time ever, ended up with a bunch of bruises but it was cool!

also tried 7leaves for the first time and instantly fell in love with mungbean

also went clubbing in sf with my friends and it was such a fun time like i had SO much fun

i got auctioned off of SAD! that phase was just a crazy ride. while there was many that dm’d me, there was only one special person that i only replied to and continued to talk to him on a daily basis

((honestly, i was scared that i was taking things a bit further with him because a part of me was like “are you ready for this?” and “have you really recovered from that guy?” or “can you give this guy your all?” just alot of overthinking))

spent 4/20 at sf with my friends, and overall had a GREAT time. took too many hits and drank so ya gorl was crossfaded. not sure if i wanna do tht again tho

unfortunately woke up with a swollen face and it lasted for a LONG time.

may

so my face is still swollen, still bad, red as a tomato and at this point i was really hesitant to meet up with the guy ive been talking to. i mean!! my skin was SO bad. i felt like i was gonna make a fool out of myself by scaring him away

but,,,, he was still willing to see me despite my appearance and : ( he was so accepting and typing this makes my heart ache bc he is SUCH a good man : (

i met up with the guy towards the end of the month in sj and first thing he does when i walk up to him is give me this great warm hug and so many smooches !!!!!!! like my heart is melting

eventually we became official !!! he got us an airbnb for the night and we jus spent time cuddling on the bed and honestly i : ( i like him so much

june

my birthday wasnt rly that like “wow” it was actually kinda annoying

my bf flew up to sf where we met up, explored the city and slept the night in at an airbnb. next day went to oakland where i introduced my friends to him!

went to my first festival with several with my friends, including ppl from our same guild from our game and it was SO fun

rolled for the first time and it was SUCH an experience. redosed like twice and ended up hallucinating which is something ill def not do again

also i really wished my bf was with me at that time : ( while i had an extremely fun time, i wish i shared that moment with him : (

july

went to vegas for my cousins 22nd bday. shit was wild

also rolled there.

also threw up for the very first time

a fight broke out at the club and that shit was fuckgin CRAZY and it was RIGHT next to our table

also used alot of my money for the whole trip in which nobody really told me about so …. i was like ok.. fuck …

also my skin was still bad during these past months so it was pretty hard masking it

like really hard. with someone with terrible eczema, its just extremely hard to hide it

august

bf flew to sac!!! he met my mom for the first time and we explored the city and stuff

and went on an ikea date! and! honestly i just really loved spending time with him :c

we also spent time with my friends! they came over also! and ate some fuckgin bomb ass waffles

and then took bus down to la to meetup with some friends from our guild towards the end of the month!

it was pretty nice to be able to stay with my bf in his apartment !!!!!

also some scalding tea but thats rly for another time

to make it super short tho: our friend that we’ve known much longer than the girl he met (less than 3 months) dropped our friendship SO quick lol

september

cousin bonding @ beach, too cold for tht doe

towards the end of the month, my bf flew me down!!! so i spent the weekend with him and like always, only had a good time with him!

AND ALWAYS EATING GOOD FOOD!

october

during this fall semester, i took online classes and one of them was a 8week class. there was a topic about mental health and how we can take care of ourselves better and i just thought it was such an important thing to cover. i feel like its not talked about enough

november

spent thanksgiving with my family down in morgan hill and ate good food! honey ham has a special place in my heart.

went black friday shopping first at walmart, lowkey disappointed in myself because i was bummed out the apple watches were sold out. the materialistic part of me jumped out oof

slept at my cousins then went to the mall! didnt get anything besides really good bulgogi fries. i hated going into stores tho cuz everything was literally crowded. hated it !!!!!!!

went to a small festival in sacramento with my friends at the end of the month and this time is 7 of us (than the usual 5)! it was sososo fun.

also took my coworker with me, it was actually amusing to see bc our group were all asian and he’s the only tall white guy

made hotpot at home and we also went out for milktea and waffles again! sooo good.

december

flew down to see my bf again and only had a good time! went to this garden with beautiful lights and ! ugh! SO pretty!

cried in his bed before my flight back, cried on the plane, cried at home and cried before i slept. i miss him

also racked up alot of hours so i could pay for my tuition and my family’s bills. kinda sucks bc im pretty tired but i gotta do what do i gotta do.

christmas was a bit lonely bc my mom went to the philippines and i dont rly talk to my brother but my kuya came the next day and we ate n watched stuff

overall, it was a whacky year. but im so glad to have met ed. he means SO much to me. a part of me was so hesitant to date him because i mean, he’s man with his life set. i dont have a car, im still in school, i have this part time job where im giving my mom all my paychecks and which the only money im keeping is just my tips (not much), i still have issues with myself and other conflicts and honestly theres much to do, learn and grow from. but he’s so supportive, understanding and loving and i love and appreciate him from the bottom of my heart. most of the time i wonder if im doing and if im being enough for him. i worry about that alot but he’s so patient with me. i laugh alot when im with him and i feel so happy.

did i mention that we are long distance? him being in la and me in sacramento. so the only thing thats connecting us is facetime. maybe once every two months will i see him in person but yep. when i had my first panic attack, i really wanted him right next to me. at that moment i felt even more sad because of course you’re gonna want you’re significant other during a moment like that. but anyways, i always miss him and i always want him next to me and i always love him. i want to hurry up and get my education done with so i can be with him. not to sound like omg im so madly infatuated with him type of thing tho. he’s someone who understands me and knows how to love me.

i hope 2020 treats me well despite all the challenges ahead of me.

#phew #old mutuals im on twtr! keep in contact with me there!

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excusemewhileiplaykh · 5 years

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What This Series Means to Me: #ThankYouKingdomHearts

I used to go to a public school right next to my apartment building when I was growing up. Unfortunately, in the 3rd grade, my mom decided to take me out of there and put me in a private school. A Catholic private school.

I was not happy.

I didn’t want to wear the dumb private school uniform. I didn’t want to go to church. I didn’t want to deal with the strict rules and the praying and all the other stuff that was “not cool” about Catholic school.

I started the 4th grade at my new school and made friends with a girl who I actually knew from elementary school. One day, she brought her KH 1 and 2 copies to school and showed me at lunch. The box art… the instruction manual… Everything was so cool and colorful. I fell in love with it. I especially remember thinking how cool Riku looked, in all his chartreuse yellow wonder.

I went home that day and looked up more stuff on the series and really got into the lore. And by that I mean I spent disgusting amounts of time every day going on kh-vids.net.

I really wanted to buy KH 1 so I can start playing the series with the first game. I wasn’t even sure how much the game was gonna cost me, but I figured it wouldn’t be more than 15 bucks (keep in mind I was in the 4th grade so that was a lot of money to me back then lol). I didn’t bother to look up the price online. Somehow I just knew that price was right. Eventually, I scraped together the money and I was so excited to finally get to buy Kingdom Hearts so I could play it for myself and not live vicariously through kh-vids.net. There was a video game store a block away from my school (my neighborhood didn’t have a Gamestop yet) and I asked my mom if we could go there after school. I asked the guy that works there if he had Kingdom Hearts, but told me he only had 2 and one copy of it at that. I asked him how much and it was exactly 15 dollars, the exact amount I had and the exact amount I had randomly guessed the game would cost.

I was kinda bummed they didn’t have KH 1, but honestly, at that age, KH 1 probably would have been too hard for me and I would have abandoned the series after that bad experience.

So it was like everything in the universe lined up just right for me to get into the series. I guessed the exact price the game would cost me. I bought 2 instead of 1, ensuring I would fall in love with the series. Hell, if I hadn’t gone to private school I never would have gotten into the series cuz I wouldn’t have befriended that girl! We were always in different classes in my public school. I guess it was meant to be.

I went home that day and rapidly did my homework so I could play it. The rest is history. I spent the entirety of that school year playing and beating and replaying that game over and over.

Unfortunately, I lost my original copy of 2 and subsequently lost my favorite game around the time I was in the 5th grade. My discovery and detachment from the series were also at the advent of extreme family issues (which I don’t want to get into).

However, 2 years later, Days came out. I was lucky enough to have a DS at that point so I could play it. My mom bought me a copy about a month after it’s release. Just like 2, I played it over and over again non-stop. I was kinda mad at the Xion twist at first and thought it was “dumb”. So much so I stopped playing the game for a good 2 weeks. I was so shocked when I saw Sora’s face on Xion that I immediately closed my DS and went to bed in anger. I got over it though. I can still remember beating it while I was sitting on my grandma’s bed. I watched the final cutscene as we were leaving her house that night.

BBS was announced. And I was pissed.

Like most people, we expected KH3, not another “spin-off”. I swore off the series and I said I wouldn’t be buying anymore KH games. Since I wasn’t going to buy that game, I decided to spoil myself. I knew about the x-blade and how Vanitas looked way before the game released in the US. I rolled my eyes at Vanitas looking at Sora and criticized Ventus being a carbon copy of Roxas. I thought to myself, “Wow, this game is gonna be so fucking stupid.”

I was watching abc family one day and commercials were rolling out and one of them was none other than an ad for BBS.

...

As soon as the commercial was over I walked into my parent’s room and told them I wanted a psp for Christmas.

Oh and by the way, Birth by Sleep is my favorite KH game now.

The family issue that began while I was still playing 2 intensified during this time. I used BBS to escape. I felt bad for Ven, Aqua, Terra, and Vanitas who were being swept up in the mistakes of others. I could relate.

It’s 2010, I found out Coded, the elusive phone game, was finally coming to the US in 2011. I was excited. I sold Dissidia and Saints Row 2 so I could buy it. Me and my mom hopped the bus to go to gamestop so I could get it because we didn’t have enough money for bus fare. Needless to say, we were in a bad place, but Kingdom Hearts was there to comfort me. I sacrificed a lot for Re:Coded so even though it was bad, I still remember it fondly.

It’s 2012. The Dream Drop Distance demo drops (no pun intended). I was absolutely in love. I was still going through intense hardship because of family issues and I was given another way to escape. Watching Riku face his demons and finally conquer the darkness that was holding him back inspired me. I thought to myself: “Maybe someday I could do the same”. I always loved Riku, but that game really made him a role model for me. I wanted to grow past the circumstances others had put me in too and start to become my own person, a person who was more confident and positive. I played through it twice back to back.

In 2012, I also started high school. Again because of family stuff, I was going through a really hard time and wasn’t immediately making friends at school. I eventually did, but those friends didn’t like video games. I still remembered Kingdom Hearts though.

In 2013, I started my blog and I immediately knew it needed a KH related name. I’ve had the same url since I started. I don’t plan to ever abandon this blog or diverge it from it’s Kingdom Hearts focus. Although my friends weren’t into Kingdom Hearts, I had all of you to talk to about it. Thanks for keeping my interest in the series alive and thanks for all the laughs throughout the years. I really mean that.

In 2013, the promise at the end of Dream Drop Distance seemed like it was about to be fulfilled. Kingdom Hearts 3 was announced to be in development. I remember being in my living room and then going to my room so I could freak out alone. I jumped and scream. I was so excited. I thought I would be playing this game by the end of high school for sure (I am now a Junior in college…)

I didn’t have ps3 at the time the remixes were coming out so I missed out on them initially. Again because of my never-ending family issues, I also lost my 3ds, psp, etc. so I couldn’t play any of my KH games. I was so starved to play one of those games again. My blog kept me connected to Kingdom Hearts during that time though and somewhat slated my desires.

I went over to one of my friend’s houses and she had a ps3 in her room. She said it used to be her brother’s but once he got his ps4, he gave it to her so she could watch Netflix. The ps3 had a Kingdom Hearts wallpaper on it and I thought it was really cool that her brother was into KH like me. I wanted to befriend him so eventually, I did. I started to talk to him in 2014 and we really got along (besides liking KH, we had the same sense of humor, views on life, politics, etc.)

It was 2015, and I had fallen in love with someone and it was all because the fates aligned on that September day in 2007 and I was able to buy the only copy of KH 2 in my local game store and because I managed to guess the exact price of the game. We’re still together today and everyday I feel more and more alive. I can actually say that Kingdom Hearts is one of the main reasons I found love.

Not only did it find me my soulmate, but it also kept me alive and hopeful when I most wanted to die. I always remembered the kind messages the series instills in its players. Small little takeaways and sayings like “There’s a light that never goes out!” or “My friends are my power! And I’m theirs!” or “Come Riku! You’ve been hanging around in the darkness too long! You gotta think positive!”

The series has always been there in some form to bring me happiness and that’s why I can never let it go.

Listen, I’m the first person to admit this series is a trash fire (my blog title is “Mickey Mouse Bullshit”). I will always view the series as a sanctuary (no pun intended), no matter what. As a beacon of hope. Sora’s incessant optimism found some way to infect me. Like Riku, I have become “Sora-esque”. I honestly believe I am the person I am today because of this series and moreover because of its characters who always fight no matter how dark it gets. I am still here because of this series.

So no matter how bad the plot gets or how dumb the time travel shit becomes or how bad the ship wars get or how elitist people are about KH2FM (which is overrated!) or all the “spin-offs” we get or the weird dialogue or all the Xehanorts and all the Soras, etc., etc., I will always love this series and support it.

I love Kingdom Hearts. I love Kingdom Hearts because over the years it has shown me how to love and has always loved me.

Thank you, Kingdom Hearts and thank you to this community.

#kingdom hearts #kh #kingdom hearts 2 #kh2 #kingdom hearts 3 #kh3 #thankyoukingdomhearts #long post

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fictionalabyss · 5 years

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Do 'em all 🤣🤣

You jerk rofl. Okay, this is gonna take a while..

also under a readmore cuz long.

1. describe yourself.- Mel, 32, mom of two, mental health issues, and no idea of who I am or ever was.. lover, fighter, spiteful, friendlier than I’d care to admit. I think that about does it?

2. if you could go anywhere for a week all expenses paid where would it be? I’d be willing to go to a lot of places, honestly. Scotland is top of the list if I can count a wedding as an expense haha.

3. do you have siblings? On my mothers side, no, I’m an only child. On my fathers side, I have a half brother, and two step brothers. I haven’t seen them since I was 11 though, but they’ve been added to my fb and now ignore my existence there.

4. what is your favorite constellation, why? Don’t think I have a favourite.

5. favorite color. Don’t have one. I like different colours for different things, and even that can change with my mood.

6. what kind of music do you listen to? Pretty much everything. My workout music (basically the only time i have time for music) ranges from the 50′s cowboy and love songs all the way to more current EDM and some metal. You introduced me to Mongolian metal, and I’ve come across and Indian metal band that has a song about fighting depression, and I love them so much. I’m still sad to have missed both Babymetal and Alestorm (Scottish pirate metal) when they came to town. Alestorm actually offered me free tickets if they could name Matrim when I was pregnant rofl.

7. favorite flower. (you can name as many as you want cause flowers are awesome) Wild flowers. I have violets that grow wild in my back yard and I love them.

8. if you could do magic, what is the first spell you would learn? I think at most, I’d like to learn minor healing, or something that would attract goodness to people.

9. favorite childhood memory.The memory of Pat getting in the baby swing and yelling “push me on the swing, mommy!” and me pushing him as high as I could and leaving him there when he got stuck roflrofl. We were 9, and it’s basically how this relationship started. I was annoyed, he was in love. I’m still annoyed but now we’re both in love.

10. have you ever been cheated on? Not that I’m aware of, but that might not have been for a lack of trying. WORD ON THE STREET WAS one of my ex’s was trying to get with someone else while with me and was turned down.

11. if you could describe your perfect room, what would it be? Big and spacious. Super comfy bed, plenty of pillows. But also a little corner with a fort that I can be little in. Close proximity to both bathroom and kitchen for obvious reasons. Big window with cute curtains. and all the thing my current room has, but less unfolded laundry rofl.

12. favorite animal. Don’t have one, but it for sure isn’t a fkin slug I’ll tell you that. Pete the peeper ruined that for all slugs.

13. what was the last photo you took of? Luke’s new pokemon cards so I could show Pat while he was at work.

14. do you believe in soul mates? I do. I believe that soulmates aren’t just lovers, but that you can have many people that your soul resonates with. I had one, or thought I did, until I was dropped like hot garbage and shit was said behind my back like I’d never find out. The fucked up part, if I got an apology, I’d probably believe them and let them back into my life like I did last time. Because I’m a fucking sucker and a slave to my heart. But the more you hurt me, the harder you have to work for my trust so I’ll probably never get one. Too much work.

15. do you hang toilet paper over or under? I have a toddler, so under so he can’t just unravel the whole fucking thing into the toilet by slapping his hand on it.

16. your go to place to eat & your favorite thing to get there. Greenstop and Poutine. They have this killer brown gravy omg.

17. do you believe everything happens for a reason? yeah. Everything is either a consequence to our actions, or a lesson to be learned. Karma, my friend. And sometimes, bad shit just happens so you have room in your life for better things. That’s how I got you and Kay.

18. guilty pressures? You mean other than 80′s and 90′s one hit wonders?

19. favorite mythical creature, why? Dragon. Cuz...dragon?

20. something most people don’t know about you. Uh.. not everyone knows me to be as friendly as you tumblr peeps do. Truth is, I’m kind of known as a bitch in person. I don’t socialize well because of my crippling anxiety, and have RBF, so people just assume. Others know it as fact because I treat people the way they treat me.

21. where did you grow up, what was it like? at 8, I moved across the street from where I live now. Before that, I lived in ‘The Point’ but most of my childhood memories are of here. A lot of my neighbours are the same people. I grew up in the 90′s, so we use to play in the street day and night and there were no worries. I’d go from park to park, house to house, just wandering from place to place with my friends. No parents, just us, as long as I got everyone back out front by the time the street lights came on, and then it was hide and seek in the dark while all the parents drank on one of the balconies and watched. It’s not like that here anymore.

22. do you believe aliens exist? You’d be an idiot to think that we are the only lifeforms anywhere.

23. what was your last google search? Big Iron by Marty Robbins.

24. what did your last relationship teach you? You really wanna get into that? It taught me that no matter what I know about a person, I don’t know them. If they talk shit about other people to me, they are talking shit about me to other people. It taught me that just because they earned my trust once, doesn’t mean they should get a free pass on it for life, that I should make them keep earning it. And finally, than when they say “I’ll understand if it doesn’t work out” it’s bullshit. I’ll end up tossed aside and forgotten while I break. And when I realize I deserve better and move on, everything becomes my fault.

25. would you relocate for love? depends where. Example : I love Kay, but I ain’t moving to Florida roflrofl.

26. do you hold grudges or forgive easy? Forgive far too easily the first few times. After that, fuck you.

27. favorite book. uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

28. do you consider yourself an extrovert or introvert? Introvert.

29. have you ever kept a journal, do you now? I have attempted to a few times. Didn’t work out. so no.

30. top 5 favorite movies. Porky’s trilogy. Ginger Snaps trilogy. uhhhhhhm.. fuck.. idk, why do you do this to me, I can’t pick favourites.

31. do you believe that everything happens for a reason? We already went over this.

32. what is your greatest fear? Falling.

33. favorite alcoholic beverage. Jack, disarono, Fluffed marshmallow vodka. UPPERCUT. legit, go into a bar and order an uppercut.

34. most embarrassing thing you’ve done. If i could think of something, I wouldn’t tell you guys muahahha.

35. do you believe in ghosts? not sure.

36. what is the best and worst part of your personality? That I’m nicer than I’d like to be. I’m mush. I’m forgiving and kind, and loving and sometimes I hate it.

37. should you split the dinner bill? Who am I at dinner with?

38. are you a good liar? Fuck no roflroflrofl. I’m the worst at it.

39. what keeps you up at night? these days, story ideas.

40. would you rather go without your phone or music? bye bye music.

41. do you believe in god? Nope.

42. how do you relax when frustrated? Mindless game on my phone, nap, or binge something.

43. what’s something that offends you? people. People offend me.

44. favorite food I’m a sucker for a good lasagne. but also cheesecake. I can never have too much cheesecake. I mean, I can, I’m lactose intolerant, but shush. Something are worth it.

45. if you were on a 10 hour flight and could sit and talk to any person the entire time, who would it be? If there’s booze on the flight, anyone. if not, literally no one. I’ll just pound back some Oxazepam and nap. wake me up when we get there.

46. when do you feel the most confident? never. ROFL.

47. what do you do on your free time? What is free time?

48. is there anyone who has completely lost your respect Oh yeah. If you’ve read this far, you might have an idea.

49. have you ever broken someone’s heart? Probably not, no.

50. did/do you play sports in school? In gym class. Oh, and I did that one summer to Tball and hated it.

51. when are you happiest? when I'm asleep.

52. coffee or tea? Tea. fuck your coffee.

53. what is one possession you own you wouldn’t want to live without? internet.

54. what is the first thing you notice about a person? Height.

55. what is your favorite season, why? I love winter, because I love everything looking so white and clean when the snow is fresh. But I also love spring because of the rain, and summer for storms and fall for colors and good weather.

56. what makes you laugh? What doesn’t.

57. are you a clean or messy person? I was given the nickname ‘Messy’ at 10 for a reason. It still applies.

58. what is important for a successful relationship? Be it friendship or romantic relationship, my answer is the same. Trust and Honesty.

59. what was your upcoming like? Do you mean upbringing? I had a single mom who worked all the time. I was pretty independent.

60. favorite holiday? Christmas.

61. what is the first thing you’d do if you won the lottery? pay off debts.

62. what’s the best pizza topping combination? Bacon crumble and cheese. Not bacon bits, fuck that shit. Bacon fucking crumble. its like, little balls of bacon or something and not many places have it anymore *sad panda*

63. favorite outdoor activity. meditation. Does that count? I just like to be barefoot outside.

64. how are you? honestly. It’s 9 am, and I’m already getting frustrated with kids. And I have a soccer game and medal ceremony coming up soooooooooooo.

65. would you rather go camping in the woods or stay at a beach resort? how about cabin in the woods, ooooor a beach resort with woods backing it. yeah.

66. what is the most beautiful thing in nature? everything.

67. favorite type of candy? Don’t got one.

68. if your life was a book, what would be the title? something super depressing, I’m sure.

69. what movie quotes do you use of a regular bases? “Later masturbater” (The Pest)

70. what was cool when you were young but not cool now? Frosted tips, mesh shirts, and snap away track pants on men HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA,. Oh, them early 00′s. I legit saw someone wearing them a few years ago and almost died.

71. what’s the craziest conversation you have ever eves dropped on? dunno hombre.

72. what’s the most interesting documentary you’ve ever watched? uhhhhhhh

73. what’s the worst hairstyle you’ve had? again, 90′s. Mushroom cut with a nike check saved in the back HAHAHAHAHA. Oh man, everyone had that way back when.

74. what do you like to cook? most things.

75. what’s the coolest animal you’ve seen in the wild? wild beavers make me happy.

76. what’s the funniest tv show you’ve ever seen? Japanese game shows. nothing is as funny as japanese games shows. Human Tetris for example is fucking hilarious.

77. do you usually follow your heart or your head? Heart. Unfortunately.

78. what is your favorite quote? I’m not sure these days.

79. what’s the weirdest crush you have ever had? I’m not sure..

80. what’s your love language? I dunno. I legit just had to google what they were, and I’m not sure which.

81. do you ever feel alone? Always.

82. ever been bullied? Far too many times.

83. are you usually early or late? Early, thanks anxiety.

84. what kind of art do you enjoy most? these days, written. But I love paintings the most, i think.

85. what do you wish you knew more about? Everything. If I could, I’d go to school and learn everything that interests me even the slightest.

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eallisnwndrlnd · 5 years

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Moving On From 2018

One thing I can say that I love about New Years is that it’s like life feels like it gave you a bit of a reset button. Not erasing anything but at least working towards improving what you did or didn’t do the past year. I definitely need that reset for this past year 2018.

Most of the year was in a bit of a stressful blur. I’m not going to bother reflecting on my previous New Years post since most of what I had hoped to come into fruition didn’t. All I can say is despite my battle with my depression and anxiety being the major factor in my stressed out year, I managed to accomplish some things. May not have been most of what I had planned but hey, that’s life sometimes.

This past 2018 I completed my 3rd year, completed my internship hours and my first semester of my last school year in college.

Even if I didn’t get in any of the companies I may have wished for my internship, I was lucky to find a company where I had a chance to utilize my skills and creativity in my writing and photography. It was pretty stressful initially when I was not getting any response from any of the fifteen companies I applied to. Thankfully it all worked out in the end. I even had fun and made it feel like a vacation with a classmate that became roommate and friend. I was feeling less claustrophobic when I was in our shared apartment in BGC, Taguig, away from the many reasons for my stress and anxiety. I was able to let myself forget about it at least during those short two months during break.

Going straight into the start of 4th year with unresolved issues and things that needed to be done, my stress and anxiety kicked into overdrive as schoolwork and personal issues at home gradually stacked up against me. By the end of the semester I was completely wound tight and sensitive as hell where I felt at any moment I could break. There were some close calls close to the end that’s for sure. Especially with some family drama that nearly buried me in an emotional quicksand. I ended up breaking down in front of my teacher for thesis because I thoroughly let myself down on that one. I was in no shape to complete it in time for the scheduled defense that was a few weeks ago. When it all comes down to it, no one is harder on me than myself. I put the high expectations on me and when I don’t meet them or make a mistake or complete it short of perfection, I dwell on it to no end. Then there was the matter of film and theatre class, where if I were back home, I may have enjoyed and been extremely enthusiastic about but alas due to my poor fluency in Tagalog I wasn’t able to truly be a part of the major projects we had to complete. I ended up taking roles that were so far away from what I really wanted to contribute but as the stories were in a language and culture that I still didn’t fully understand, I was in no way able to contribute in the way I would have wanted to anyway.(One of the brighter spots of film was being able to share some of my favorite films of all time and also participate in our groups documentary on a Badjao community despite being in pain and sick more than half the time. Seeing and meeting some of the people with their strength and courage and determination despite their hardships, really helps one put things in perspective.) With the organizations I am a part of, even if I had a minor role in all three, I still didn’t feel up to the task. I really kind of played dead dog for most of my responsibilities in ISO.

Honestly, this semester and even last semester, I felt myself ever so slightly detach from everything and kind of just mechanically go through the motions just managing to barrel through out of sheer need to complete my four years in college, do well and graduate. This semester is the first time in over four years where I found myself nearly having an anxiety attack. Not once, but three times. Once during debate when my brain refused to memorize my speech and then I fucked up completely during the recitation for my midterms. (I’m just thankful that my written speech helped me pick my grade up for that. Writer I may be, but speaker I sorely am not) It didn’t help that I still get a bit of stage fright every once in a while. Then the second was when my cousin messaged me about my mother having a schizophrenic episode and that it was causing drama and issues. The third one was during one of our theatre rehearsals and that one had no initial trigger except my stupid bronchitis that refused to go away that came out of a cold that has lasted frakking forever. Toss in several emotional breakdowns and smoking a ciggy after three years ciggy free and I could say I was down for the count. These past holidays of Thanksgiving and then Christmas were kind of meh considering I was sick for the first one and ma and I both were sick for the latter. But I pretty much had been sick on and off all this past semester and throw in my fibromyalgia kicking in worse than its been in the past four years, bringing spasms of pain that brought me to tears and bouts of insomnia this entire past year, 2018 brought more pain in more ways than one than anything else. I’m just thankful my ma, pop and family and friends (and my possessed cat, Gandalf) are still healthy and those that aren’t so much are on the road to being so, hopefully soon.

This new year 2019 is hopefully the year where I finally meet one of my lifetime goals of graduating and getting a college degree. After so much work and sacrifice not only from me but my parents, I need to reach that goal. I will be starting my fourth year second semester at the end of this month but before that hopefully will have completed our final film and theatre projects as well as getting some traction in completing my thesis that is now not a solo one as I included three classmates to be a part of it. At the end of the day, even if I had wanted my thesis, that I started with on my own, to be solely mine, I had to consider my health both mentally and physically which became the deciding factor in no longer trying to push myself in such a way that would’ve hurt me rather than help. As I near graduation, I will set out in determining what I want to do afterwards. Whether I stay here (that’s only if I get an opportunity down the road) or go back to the States or go to another country has yet to be determined. If I were to go back to the States, I’d then have to decide which state I’d be moving to. Or rather, WE would be moving to. We as in me and mother. Yes, my mom is a big factor in my decision. She has to be, there’s no point deluding myself that I would be comfortable with any other scenario. I’ve watched over that woman pretty much all my life and have been a sort of parent-like person for her since I was a kid. As she grows older and goes deeper into her schizophrenia and becomes more fragile, I cannot in my heart think of any other alternative other than keeping her with me. It’s not some martyrdom complex or anything like that, it’s just how I am wired. Even with all my issues and the mental, emotional and physical toll it has taken on me, I love my mom and she brought me up the best way she knew how or could do. I can’t fault her for her illness and I can’t ignore the fact that she needs me as much as I need to know she is ok...as ok as she is capable of being. I may gripe and such but let’s face it, these are the cards I was dealt and I’ve managed all this time somehow and I’m pretty sure as I get older and wiser I’ll get better and better at doing so. But for the most part I can say I’m at peace with my decision (even when a tiny voice inside my head screams at me WTF are you thinking!!! HEEELP MEEE!) Now I’m just torn between should I stay or should I go (now. ....sorry had to. As I was typing those words I was singing it dammit!!!) And if I go, go where exactly? What do I do with my cat? How tf am I getting the beloved furry pain in my butt to come with me? What best fits not only my needs but my mothers and (if my furbaby is coming) Gandalf? New York? (That’s expensive AF) San Francisco? (SAME! but but SWEATER WEATHER LOVE!!!) L.A. (I’m not gonna lie, my home city is the last choice on my short list) Seattle? (perhaps but can my ma stand the so called gloomy weather which I am partial to?) S.A. (STOP! HAULT! DO NOT GO THERE! Though I have many fond memories and do love the city in many ways including my family and friends..and cheaper rent per square foot...and delicious bbq...I just can’t...cuz politics, namely its states’ politics. I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t want my tree hugging, In-N-Out loving ass either anyhow.) I guess I can only say We’ll see. As I get closer to the end of my fourth year I’ll be more sure of which direction I’d want to go but so many things can still happen from now to then so I just want to leave myself open to any possibility that I may not have even thought of.

So besides all that ‘off to the future I go’ crap, lets see...what do I want to see myself accomplish this year. I...

Must read more books (last year was depressing af for my bookwormish self as I only read three books, actually technically two were only completed in 2018 but I started in 2017. Now that’s sad for someone who used to down one to two books a day and read as she walked)

Must get rid of more of my shit (I actually have been slowly accomplishing this little by little but seeing as it is nearing the end of my time at UB I must do this in its entirety by the middle of the year.)

Must write at least one script of my own and complete it. (I have a few synopsis ideas written down, I just need to sit my butt down and make it a full story)

Hope to go to Tokyo, Australia, New Zealand, Thailand and again to South Korea. (At least Tokyo I hope for this year)

Must lose the weight I gained only during this past semester. (I can only fit my rollies into two of my jeans and both have holes, one was bought that way and the other lost the battle with a tricycle and a school chair)

Must cook more (I actually have been little by little doing just that, thanks to Instagram people who post recipes that motivate my lazy ass into wanting to cook what’s in the picture.)

Must regularly volunteer again(Unfortunately I haven’t taken much time to do any since I’ve been here. Hopefully once my workload at school eases I can finally take the time to do this. It’s one of the things I love doing with my time because it’s the time when I can do something that isn’t for me but for someone else which I guess in a way is also for me in the sense that it just makes me feel good.)

Must explore more of the Philippines (hopefully after I graduate we can do this)

Hope to get to Guru level on Gurushots (only need to mark off four more of the criteria to get there)

Hope to learn a third language (I’m thinking either Spanish or Korean since I at least know some vocabulary and short phrases already. The fact that I would love to be able to watch my kdramas without subtitles definitely gives me the incentive to lean toward the latter.)

Hope to get more than four hours of sleep on average. (I would love that, only if my neighbors (front, both sides and back) dogs and Gandolf agree to keep it quiet during the wee hours in the morning)

Must follow my daily, weekly, monthly goal checklist for more than just one month (yup that’s pretty much all that it lasted give or take a few weeks then days, last year)

If I can manage to even complete a fourth of that which is mentioned above, I will have done this long ass blog entry justice. So if y’all managed to reach the end of all this ridiculousness, I wish to say to you HAPPY NEW YEAR and may this year and the many years to come bring you all you hope for and more. Let’s 2019 the shit out of this frakking year and make it our bitch!!!

(At least I can say with this yearly blog entry that I’ve managed to keep this one and only friggin tradition during New Years)

#new year #new years resolution #new years eve #life #goals

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eyesoftheworld · 3 years

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a life of constant stress

good things

bad things

early fall 2016. realizing i'm in a toxic relationship with a cheating liar who cares only about himself.

early winter 2017. happy because that toxic relationship ended and I can finally move on with my life.

summer 2017. happy because i met someone who i *thought* cared about me. getting ready to move cities, start over, and go back to school.

fall 2017. realizing i'm in a toxic relationship with an abusive, drug/porn addict that didn't care about me. drinking 7 nights a week, working 3 jobs and still barely making rent between cbus and btown, in deep with an eating disorder, skipping classes.

late winter 2017. met cute boy, fell in love, started to eat again, slowed down my drinking, fell out of love with the person i was with.

early winter 2018. broke up with toxic boyfriend. started dating cute boy from winter 2017, things are going great, i'm eating again, going back to school, i stopped drinking.

spring 2018. things are going great. i'm happier than ever, living with my boyfriend (cute boy from winter 2017 still, now calling him J), taking care of myself, and my lizard, still going to school. finally able to get my life on the right track. WRECKED MY CAR.

spring 2018. can't drive without fear of dying. burdening J by having him take me to and from work. barely affording my bills every month, depressed, skipping classes, dropped out because can't keep up with it all. Working 12 hour shifts as often as i can to make extra money so i can live.

summer 2018. finally got a car in april, needed some work so i'm taking care of that. things are better now that i'm not in school. i'm able to breathe a little bit. still working like mad to make ends meet, but it's okay because i like my job, and i work with J. planning to move into our own place. feeling better, and like i'm finally able to get my life back on the right track. HAS TO PAY OFF SCHOOL LOAN ($2500) FOR DROPPING OUT.

fast forward to late winter 2018. things are going well, a third of my school is paid off, we are getting close to christmas, and our birthdays, and anniversary. we got a bird in august, he's cute. obi is healthy and adorable as ever. happy. considering schooling again but not until 2019. ready to take control of my life. I get health insurance in january. OBI DIES SUDDENLY AND IT COSTS ME $500 TO FIND OUT WHY HE DIED, AND HAVE HIM CREMATED.

fast forward to spring 2019. i'm finally feeling better about losing my sweet boy, and i'm going to take in a couple of rescue lizards, i'm more heavily considering schooling again, still not yet though, just looking around. spending more time with my family. i hate my job, but i suffer through it because it pays me well, and i only have to work 3 days a week. CASH (DOG OF 14 YEARS) DIES.

fast forward to early fall 2019. i'm doing better after losing my second pet in a years time. J and i have moved into our new apartment, we have now 3 birds, and 2 lizards, we are taking on 2 more birds shorly, very excited. most of school is paid off. i started a new job that pays more and is fun. things are going well. i'm happy. MY HEALTH SIGNIFICANTLY DECLINES FROM WORKING WITH MOLD, FORCED TO QUIT JOB. I GO BACK TO WORKING AT THE JOB I HATED.

early winter 2020. starting a new job soon, i'll make more money, it's closer to home. i paid off my schooling, i finally got braces. putting off school a bit longer cuz i'm working 11-7 at work and schooling around that is not doable. things are going well. still have J and the animals. still meeting up with friends and family often. COVID RIPS OUR FREEDOM AWAY.

at this point i feel it's a good time to fast forward to random points of the year.. not a lot of good things have happened since COVID.

summer 2020. the world is on lockdown. people still wont wear a mask and think its all fake.

fall 2020. not getting along great with J's family, my bearded dragon Smaug dies. i impulsively bought a car out of my budget because "its as good a time as any.

winter 2021. bird dies suddenly. gets slapped with owing $1200 to the government for having insurance just after taking a 4$ pay cut.

kms

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hobimysun-shine · 6 years

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Once in a lifetime, forever in a lifetime

A/N: I am aware that I am the worst with uploading on time, but I literally have no time to write, cuz college applications all the time and studying. I had some free time now around Christmas, so I hope you enjoy!! :)

Summary: Childhood friends with maknae line, coming-of-age kinda thing all the way through college, that will eventually include the hyung line as well, but i wont spoil anything for you, will get hardcore later on, i will put some trigger warnings, when i get to it;;

In this chapter: start it off with a lil smut (spoilers) and then a loots of angst

childhood friend jimin/ platonic maknae line/ apart from jungkook/ vmin/ namjin/ hoseok x reader/ jungkook x reader/

Genre: mostly angst, fluff, smut + some sexual connotations/

Word count: almost 7k

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3:

Your phone beeped underneath the pile of notebooks for the 100th time this day and you just rolled your eyes, annoyed by the sound. You moved around the mess of notes on your bed to find the little machine that distracted you from learning all the steps for your practical exam tomorrow. It was a message from Jimin. Again. You closed the notification before giving yourself the time to read it and turned off the sound. You cursed Hoseok under your breath, for convincing you to unblock the boys and to give them a chance to talk to you. You weren’t even planning to allow it, after you spent two nights crying from anxiety that they were in the same city as you again.

After a week of not talking about it however, Hoseok decided to bring up the topic to light, which was not the best idea and you didn’t know why he would do it after he was the one that had to soothe you for two night straight. But according to him, the “pain” he saw you dealing with for an year now, would not “disappear on its own” and you were supposed to “do something about it”. Which apparently was talk with Jimin, Jungkook and Taehyung. And you were doing quite well with disagreeing with him, until he had thrown his arms around your waist, nuzzled his head in your neck and whispered a “please, I hate seeing you hurt” in your ear. And of course, you being the weak piece of shit that you are, said yes before your mind could even catch up what you were agreeing to. And now Hoseok was constantly asking you if you did it yet, to which you would answer that you needed a little more time to feel ready to face them.

Lost in thought, you jumped when someone knocked on your door. You ran to the entrance and peeped through the hole to see the said Hoseok standing on your doormat. You opened the door which a rush and jumped into his arms.

“Hello there, beautiful”, he said, suffocated by your hair and put you down giggling.

“Where have you been?” you asked eagerly since you haven’t heard of Hobi in three days, and the last thing he said to you was “did you talk to Jimin”.

“Exams, you know”, he scrunched his face in disgust. “But I am done for the year now, so I went to the store and bought food and wine so we can celebrate tonight” he raised the bags in both of his hands that were now threatening to rip apart.

You moved away from the door, so that Hobi could enter and head to the kitchen, where he spent more time than you did, even though it was your apartment.

“That’s such a great idea, but my last practical exam is tomorrow Hobi, I have to study” you whined.

He turned around after he had already put out all the ingredients and tied an apron around his waist with flowers that said “#1 Mom in the world!” on it and matched perfectly with his ripped jeans and dark shirt. He threw a disappointed look at you.

“A practical huh?” he said bringing his hand to his chin in thought. “Come here” he gestured in a second.

“What?” you looked at him in confusion, but listened and moved closer to him.

“Hold this”, he gave you a knife in one hand and a fork in the other.

He adjusted your hands as if you were about to perform and resection and took a step back to look at you up and down.

“You’re doing great, sweetie, you don’t need to study anymore”, he clapped his hands and concluded as he shooed you out of the kitchen corner as if you were about to light it on fire (and by knowing your cooking abilities, his concerns were justified).

“Hobi, I’m serious you know this is the most important exam for the whole year!” you still tried to protest.

“I know Y/N…” he wondered for a second, his face finally getting serious” okay, how many of the books have you read?”

“Um… all of them?”

“All of them??” his eyes widened.

“Twice…”, you added shyly.

“Twice? Kim Y/N don’t you dare tell me you haven’t studied enough, do you know that for this exam I read only half of everything and got an 86%” Hobi huffed.

“Yeah, but you’re smart” you said crossing your arms in front of your chest.

“And you’re smarter!” he said simply which caught you off guard because he rarely praised you, since most of your conversations revolved around making fun of each other.

Sensing the silence, Hobi turned and flashed a smile.

“But I’m still gonna be a better surgeon than you, miss!” he shrugged.

“We’ll see about that!” you smiled as well and got closer to see what Hobi was cooking, completely giving up on the thought of going back in the room to your medical books, when he was here flashing smiles and filling your apartment with the sweet scent of his cologne.

An hour later, you were sitting on the couch, legs thrown over Hoseok’s lap, full with the delicious spaghetti he had prepared for dinner and slightly buzzed after you two had downed two bottles of red wine. You were gasping for air at a joke he had made and tried to get off the couch before you threw up the food you just ate.

“Hey, where are you going?” he asked and pulled you back down, this time closer to him.

“I was going to pick a movie we can watch” you said, as it was a routine to watch a movie with him when he would come over and cook at your place.

You saw him shift next to you as he still was holding you down.

“Actually Y/N, I thought we could do something else tonight” Hobi looked straight in your eyes and you could feel your heart speeding up like crazy.

“Like what?” you asked while trying to seem calm on the outside, even though you could feel your cheeks warming up and you were praying he would think it was because of the wine.

“Like…” he paused as he once again moved closer to you. “Like talk about your past” he finally said and you tried your best not to show your disappointment.

You were actually quite immune to being disappointed with Hoseok because after an year of constant body contact, and no words of affection, you were no longer expecting any sort of romantic confession from him. However you couldn’t help, but get flustered after hearing him speak like that.

“Um… my past?” you blinked a few times, trying to assimilate his request.

“Yeah… I mean”, he stopped to take a deep breathe ”I know we talk about a lot of stuff, like medicine, people in college, movies, music, books, flowers, even the future. But we have never talked about the past. And I want to know about it, now that you have to face it.”

He managed to hold eye contact, even though you could see it was hard for him. You didn’t say anything for a minute or two. You finally exhaled, not realizing you were holding your breath for so long.

“Okay, I’ll tell you” you agreed.

“Everything?”

“Everything” you confirmed and he smiled.

“But” you continued and his smile disappeared. “You also have to tell me. Everything” this time you looked straight in his dark eyes.

He gave it a thought and finally tilted his head a bit.

“Deal, but you’re first.”

You took a deep breathe, and tried to take yourself back in time, which you have been avoiding to do in the past few months. What exactly meant “everything”?

“Okay, well… where do I start? I am from Busan, I was born there, because it’s my father’s city. My mom is from Spain.”

“Wait that’s why you’re eyes are lighter and you hair is kinda wavy?” Hobi’s eyes widened as if he had discovered something great.

“Yes, but don’t take it as a good quality of mine. I have always been bullied about it and it really helped me getting the label “weird” in school.”

“I have always though they made you more beautiful,” Hobi stated.

Heartbeat.

“Yeah, that’s what Jimin would say as well. Which brings me to him. The boy with the blonde hair and the…piercings” you shuddered, not because you were against them in any way, but because you weren’t used to that image of him. ”Remember?”

“Yeah, hard to forget, I think you gave him a blue eye” Hobi scratched his head.

“Anyway, him. We were neighbors when we were born and we have been friends ever since I can remember. Our families are friends… well…were, but that’s for later. So yeah, I know him since a baby. I know Taehyung from the kindergarten and Jungkook since middle school. We have always been friends. I don’t know why exactly, but I have always had a hard time with trusting people and I never really made too many friends. In high school we were kind of the cool kids because they became “super hot” and girls were all over them.”

“Wait I thought you said you were weird?” Hobi stopped you in confusion.

“Yeah, I was… but like cool weird. I don’t know, I never really cared about these things. But anyways, until the senior year of high school it was like that. Strict rich parents, a private high school, with the only three people I could trust and many parties, but nothing crazy, just alcohol and weed sometimes. So yeah, last year of high school. By then my father and Jimin’s father had a company together for many years. I don’t really know what happened because I never really cared about business, but apparently my father screwed over Jimin’s and his father was left without a position. Jimin has always been really close to his family, so it wasn’t a surprise to me that he found it hard to talk to me the day after it happened. It was a surprise however, that he didn’t even try to hear me out even though he knew that I had nothing to do with it. He never spoke to me since then…until now. I also dated Jungkook for a few months back then, until he decided to screw me and leave after the thing with Jimin happened. Taehyung would also pass me in the hallways after I unintentionally sent his application to the wrong university…I was so tired with the applications for medicine, I didn’t even realize what I was doing until they emailed him that the program he is applying for was medical, not for actors. After that he would only talk to Jimin, but he had always liked him the most. I guess they really must have hated me then. They didn’t speak to me ever since October senior year. Not when my grandma passed away, which was the hardest thing in my life, since she was the only person from my family I have even been close to. Not when the other girls from school would pick up fights with me in the hallways. Not even when I overdosed on sleeping pills and was taken to the hospital. Nothing. At the end of the year, I went to prom alone, and after that Jimin left to study modern dance, Tae made it into a couple universities for acting and Jungkook would major in art. I was left with my medicine in Seoul, Which brings me to that night, on my first college party, when I met you.”

You lifted your head to see that Hobi was staring at you with a mix of sadness and compassion pooling from his eyes.

“I see why you don’t want to talk to them,” he finally said.

“Yeah…well, c’mon now. It’s your turn” you pushed him playfully.

He exhaled.

“Okay, so. I’m from Gwangju. And my family was shit pretty much. My mom left when I was born after spending a few years with my father and my older sister. Ever since I can remember, my father has been drinking heavily and would gamble all the time. He would spend every single won my sister made and she was forced to work part-time since she was fifteen. She left soon after she turned seventeen, but has always been contacting me and never stopped sending me part of the money she made. She is smart and it was easy for her to be noticed by companies and get jobs early on. In the beginning I made money with dancing, which is actually something as a passion of mine” he chuckled.

“Wow, I never even thought of that,” you gasped, your brain denying the fact that you definitely liked to get attached to dancers, apparently.

“Yeah… and in high school I was never a kid who had a lot of friends, but no one ever tried to make fun of me either, I guess I was just minding my own business and they knew I could get physical if I had to, so no one bothered me. All of my friends were older, I had a few that I would hang out with, but they were constantly travelling, they should be in college now, but I don’t know where exactly.”

“What are their names” you asked curiously.

“Doesn’t really matter, but the closest person in my life, other than you and my sister, was a guy that was an year older than me, named Yoongi. As I said, I don’t really know where he is right now…”

Hoseok went silent, which indicated that this was all he could say.

Comparing his past to yours, you felt bad that you always made such a fuss about your issues, when he had it much worse than you, but was always the one to hold you.

“I’m sorry… I never knew…”

“I was that messed up, I know” Hobi smiled a little, “but don’t be sorry Y/N. You had only made my life better for all it matters. Much better.

You smiled back at him and allowed yourself to get a little closer to his body.

You two stayed like that for a while when Hoseok broke the silence.

“You know sometimes I think…about when we first met” he was looking down.

“I think about what you did.” He moved his hand on your thigh.

“What I did?” your heartbeat was speeding up again, and this time your brain could not think straight, because there was just one think Hoseok could be talking about.

“Yeah… you don’t remember… but you kissed me. A few times” he said neither closing, nor increasing the distance between the two of you.

“Yeah, I guess I did” was all you could say and cursed silently.

It wasn’t your fault, you’ve never been in such situation with a boy. Jungkook has always been much more for the action and less for the words kinda guy.

“Yeah… sometimes I wonder…”

You wonder?

“I wonder what it would feel like, if you kissed me again” he spoke all in once.

…

“Why don’t you come and find out” you said bluntly, which immediately regretted, but when you lifted you head to say “sorry” you saw Hoseok just inches from you.

You were now pressed back and his body was shadowing over yours. His face was so close to yours and your eyes went down to his plump pink lips, which were getting closer with every second. Hoseok soon closed all distance between you and your lips met his, soft and hot. He pressed them onto yours a couple of times before you felt his wet tongue asking for access, which you gave right away and he collided into you. Soon enough his hand was on your bare waist and the other was softly placed on your neck. He pulled away so you can both take a breath.

“Has Jungkook ever kissed you like that?” he asked, but there was nothing cocky in his question. You felt like he honestly cared if anyone has kissed you like he really meant it, in the way he did.

“No” was all you said, before his lips were once again onto yours.

He was good, the way his tongue explored every part of your mouth, they was his lips felt onto yours and the way he sucked and bit them making them red and swollen.

His lips moved to you jawline, placing wet kisses all along and eventually finding your neck, where he gently bit once again, making you moan.

“Shit, Y/N, do that again,” he said and bit even deeper making sure to leave a purple mark on your soft spot, moans leaving your body.

He had moved his hand down to your lower body and was slowly making his way between your legs. He played with the waistband of your sweatpants and then your panties as he eventually slipped his hand to your bare core. You moaned his name in the kiss, which apparently was a turn on, because he moaned back and you felt a finger slide against your entrance. More moaning and soon the fingers were three.

“Please” was all you could say through hitched breath.

“Fuck, baby, you are so wet for me, it drives me insane” Hobi said, the grip on your neck tightening as he kissed you and let a finger slide into you.

You were now a moaning mess, and Hoseok was only making it harder for you. He eventually added the other two fingers and was skillfully sliding them in and out of you, slowly, but very surely leading you to your high.

“Hobi… Hoseok, I’m … fuck, I’m close” you cried in his bare chest.

“Not yet baby”, he said, and with that, slid all of his fingers out of you, leaving you empty and needy.

You whined with displease, but Hobi made sure to not leave you like that for too long.

“Babygirl, I want to feel you around me,” he said and positioned himself in between your legs.

You wasted no time as your hands immediately went down and unbuckled his jeans and slid them off, leaving him in his boxers around his very hard member.

You threw your legs around him and kissed him in excitement, but pulled back when nothing happened. Hoseok looked at you with sincerity in his eyes.

“Are you sure you want this Y/N? Because I can’t… I mean I don’t really know what we are, or what we are gonna be. But… I know that I love you and I won’t leave, so…”

“I want you” you said interrupting him and with a kiss, he slid right into you, stretching you out completely.

“Fuck, you are so tight” he almost growled as he gave you time to adjust and started moving slowly at first. He eventually picked up his pace, and you buried your head in his neck leaving small hickeys and moaning into the kisses.

His hips were driving you insane, each motion getting you a step closer to your orgasm, as your moans became hotter and louder.

“Are you close, Y/N?” he asked though a moan.

Yes, God, yes, please” you said and Hobi slowed down his movements, making each thrust harder and sloppier, when eventually with one last slam you kissed him and came, with him reaching his high just seconds later and letting you ride out your orgasm.

He pulled out of you and let himself fall right next to you in complete bliss, while you were trying to catch your breath. He then got up and came back soon after bare-chested and wearing only shorts with a warm cloth and wiped you off, putting your panties back on. Then he laid next to you, hugging you closely and plopping a blanket over the two of you.

“I love you, Y/N” he said and kissed you sweetly one last time.

“I love you, Hobi” you said back and threw your arms around him, slowly drifting to sleep to the sound of his heartbeat, for the first time in forever truly happy and away from all sorrow.

You opened your eyes slowly to the early morning sunlight shining through the curtains in the living room. It took a few seconds before you remembered completely what happened the night before and the moment all memories completely returned to your mind, you propped yourself up on your elbows, slight headache reminding you of the two bottles of wine that you downed yesterday. You groaned and turned around to see if Hoseok was still next to you. And he was. His arm still loosely hanging around you, his face fully relaxed, making the usual devilish vibe about him disappear and leaving his angelically beautiful features exposed. You unconsciously smiled and extended your hand to touch his flawless skin with the back of your hand.

You saw the corners of his mouth move up as he reached for your hand on his face and interlaced your fingers with his. He slowly opened his eyes and looked straight at you. You were surprised by that sudden movement and dipped back pulling the blanket over your head to which Hoseok just laughed.

“What are you doing Y/N?” he asked surprised by your actions.

He came closer and tried to pull the blanket down, but you held it tight letting only one eye out.

“Don’t look at me like that, I’m ugly early in the morning” you muttered and tried to get the blanket out of his grip, but he was much stronger and just pulled it all away from your face.

“Baby you are so pretty,” he whispered and before you realized, he gave you a peck.

“Are you blind, my hair is messy and my makeup is probably smudged all over my face?” you protested.

“No” he just said and then kissed you harder adding his tongue to the kiss and leaving you breathless, without anything else to say.

“God, I could kiss you all the time” he smiled and then continued peppering kisses all over you.

You giggled completely lost in happiness, until you realized how weird it was to be completely unbothered by anything. When you suddenly remembered reality and jumped away from Hoseok’s grip, who was now going lower to your neck.

“What’s wrong Y/N?” he asked in worry.

“The exam, my exam, today, now” you practically blurted out as you made your way to your phone to see the time.

When you finally reached the table where you left your phone last night, you looked at the screen in panic. 9:00 am.

Good. Good. You sat back on one of the chairs. You had time, since your exam was from 11:00 am.

You lifted your head when you saw Hobi enter the kitchen and almost gasped out loud. Yeah he was practically naked into you last night, but seeing him like that in the light of day was different. He had perfect proportions, not too muscly, but not too skinny, long legs, broad shoulders and just slightly visible abs. You caught yourself staring and turned your head blushing at the sight. You couldn’t afford to be that distracted. Not before the most important exam of the year.

Hobi came to you and lifted your chin with one finger.

“You’re not late, relax” he laughed. “I am going to leave now and let you get in the right mind for a test.” He went on and you almost whined.

“And after that, you are going to go and talk to Jimin” he continued unbothered and ignored the face you made.

“Um, sorry sir, just because I let you get lucky, does not mean you can tell me what to do now” you stood up and stuck a finger into his chest.

“No, but you would still listen to me, ain’t that right?” he wiggled his eyebrows and jumped away just in time to miss the punch that was coming at his face.

He moved closer one last time and gave you a long and passionate kiss.

“You are gonna do great Y/N. At everything today” he said assuring, and somehow you believed him once again.

“But what if I don’t” you said in small voice.

“Well, if you don’t, I’m just one call away” he smiled and with that disappeared into the other room to get dressed and leave you alone, to deal with everything else in the world.

***

You couldn’t concentrate throughout the exam. Your mind was periodically flying off to last night and Hoseok or to what would follow this afternoon. So you were quite surprised when the arbiter gave you your evaluation paper that said that you got overall 90%.

“You demonstrate great knowledge and precision, Ms. Kim, although we believe that you would have done even better if you weren’t so hm… distracted.” Said the woman who gave you the evaluation form dryly, to which you thanked and left the room.

It was okay. 90% was less than your usual scores, but it was better than Hoseok, so you considered it as a success.

You were now out in the sun, which would normally do you good, since you loved sunny days, but today it was just making your headache worse and the thought of Jimin more tiring.

You sat on the grass and took a few deep breaths. You moved your hand through your backpack trying to find your phone meanwhile finding a bag of nuts that you also got out to snack on. With shaky fingers, you unlocked your phone and went to messages, where Jimin and the rest have been spamming you apparently since the beginning of last summer. You tried not to read everything else that was sent, as your mind focused only on finding the address of their current location.

You eventually found it and headed to your car (a present by your parents for finishing the first school year), where you got the information in the GPS and headed there.

On the way, you were focusing on everything else, but the slow anger burning in your bones, trying to ignore it, as if it would disappear if you wouldn’t acknowledge its existence long enough. You almost passed a few red lights and ran over a squirrel in your haze, and eventually your GPS announced that you had reached your destination.

You parked in front of the white building where they lived and closed your eyes massaging your temples.

You were going there to talk. Not to beat them up again, or to run. To talk.

You opened the door and went out. Just talk. You took a step ahead, and you almost fell, your heel getting stuck in between two stones on the ground. You cursed under your breath and at yourself that you hadn’t picked something less flashy to put on in the morning.

Another thing that had also changed throughout the year was your style. Before, in high school you were quite used to wearing more boyish outfits, wide t-shirts and loose pants, making sure to fit in with the other boys. After you left, you had decided that together with the hair and location, you also needed to change your wardrobe. For a weekend you had thrown away all old clothes and stack up on “girl clothes” that included short skirts, cropped tops and skinny jeans, which with time you got used to wearing and even felt nice that you were finally free to feel like an actual girl. So without taking to account the fact that you were visiting your old friends that day, after taking a shower in the morning, you had thrown a short skirt and a shirt that enhanced your features and a pair of your favorite heels that showed off your legs.

You shrugged, trying to ignore the fact that the boys were not the only ones that had visibly changed and continued to approach their apartment building. How convenient, you thought, that they all lived together. You didn’t have to search for each one of them individually.

The number on the door said “9”, which indicated that you were at the right place, and before you had the time to rethink your actions, you pressed the bell in anticipation, that made you regret eating those nuts at lunch.

You heard slow steps approaching the door, which immediately signalized it was Taehyung that would open the door, because only he could walk in that manner.

The last few seconds before the door opened were like minutes, in which you became even more anxious and impatient. The initial adrenaline high from the sex with Hoseok last night was wearing off with time. Just when you were about to consider running away once again, the door opened and a not very tall boy that seemed genuinely done with you already stood in front of you. You stood speechless for a few seconds, without any of you saying or doing anything. Finally he moved his hand to his face in a motion of looking at an invisible clock on his wrist.

“Can I help you, orr…” his voice was very slurred and reminded you a bit of Tae and for a moment you wondered whether he is not drunk.

“Um… Sorry, I was looking for Jimin… or Jungkook, or Tae?” you asked still in a position ready to run away at any given point.

”Ah, are you one of the girls from last night? Cuz if you are, they said to tell you, they are not interested in any further communication of any sort” he replied annoyed.

“Last night? Ah no… I’m very confused” you really were. “Will you just tell them that Y/N wanted to talk to them… or whatever?” you said and turned around in rush and anger, just to feel the boy grab your wrist.

“Y/N?” he repeated, now slightly more interested than before.

“Yeah, just tell them that whenever they have a little of their precious time, I would be glad to speak to them?” you continued sarcastically and tried to pull your wrist away from his grip.

“Tsk, you really are something, as they said” the boy smirked and pulled you towards the door.” Come with me.”

You protested for a little while and finally gave up ,since the boy was not letting go, and let him drag you into a dim hallway, all the way to a quite spacious living room, where music was sounding from somewhere, and the air was filled with the thick scent of alcohol.

“Wow” you said out loud really surprised by the never changing abilities of your friends to turn every place into a party hole in no time.

“Yah, Jimin-ah!” the boy shouted through the room. “A little someone has come to look for you! And she’s quite sexy if I do say so myself” he added more to himself, you were sure with the sole purpose to annoy you.

You turned to him and this time managed to pull your wrist away from his hand. You looked at him more carefully. He wasn’t too tall, but considering your height, even a house gnome was taller than you. His hair was bleached white and his clothes were ripped and messy on purpose, which definitely succeeded giving him a “bad boy” vibe, which you were sure most girls were instantly tuned on by.

“First of all, I have a name that I believe you already know, and second of all,” you looked at him with the deadliest glare you could pull off “fuck you.” You simply stated and moved past him making sure to push him lightly and sat on the couch.

He turned around, getting ready for a comeback, but was interrupted by the voice of Jimin entering the room.

“Yoongi, I told you to not let any of the girls, that knock on the door-“ he stated, but then his eyes fell on you and he stopped midsentence.

Yoongi?

You chickled.

“What, do they need to make an appointment, to see you?” you said cockily, not bothering to move your eyes away, suddenly feeling too bold.

Jimin gulped.

“Y/N- ah… you came? I didn’t think you would, after what happened and you weren’t returning any calls or messages and I-“ his voice suddenly became soft again, dropping of his previous act.

“Yeah, well I did.” You simply said.

“So do you have anything to say to me, since my phone is already blocked from your texts?” you continued.

“I’m-“ Jimin tried to speak, but was interrupted by the bedroom door opening.

“Yooo Chimmy boy, who you talkin’ to?” you heard another very well-known voice belonging to no other, than Jungkook, followed by Taehyung.

They, same as Jimin, looked around and the moment they saw you, their smiles vanished as if someone slapped them across the faces.

“Wow, I didn’t want to ruin the mood” you pouted and got up, suddenly feeling vengeful.

You walked to the table close by, as you made sure to bend a little when you sipped water in a cup, so that all of them could see your legs and hear the sound of the heels on the floor. They wanted to see confident, well you could play that. They wanted dirty, you could play that as well.

“Okay, Y/N please don’t hit me again?” Jimin was the first to speak. “First of all, I am so sorry for everything okay? I truly am. I regretted everything the moment I stopped talking to you. But my ego was too big at the time. I am so sorry for being an asshole, when your grandma passed… and when you were taken to the hospital. I am so sorry?”

“You knew I had nothing to do with the stupid company, Jimin” you spoke, this time there was no sugar coating your words.

“I fucking know… but my mom cried all the time and I was stupid, I was dumb” he said once again.

“Yeah, you were.” You agreed, still glaring at him.

He visibly got smaller under your look. You moved your eyes to Taehyung.

“Listen. I am aware that it was my mistake that you missed the application date for your dream university. I am aware of that okay. But you didn’t even gave me the chance to apologize, Tae?” your tone was less accusing, since you believed he was the only one who had a reason to not talk to you, from the three of them.

“I know, I am also sorry.” He quietly said.

“None of my actions after that were justified, I know it” his voice had dropped an octave lower and you didn’t know how to respond to him, since anger was still boiling on the inside.

“And you, little shit?” you said quietly, moving your gaze to Jungkook. “What is your excuse, other than, you fucked me once, and got tired of me?”

You were not shy with Jungkook, since you were most angry with him and with each spoken word, you were moving closer to him, getting dangerously close.

“Don’t play dumb. You know exactly why I dumped you, and it had nothing to do with the sex.” He spat back which surprised you, because no, you did not know in fact.

“Excuse me?” your face was heating up and your hands were itching.

“There were plenty of rumors Y/N. I’m not saying they were true, but everyone was saying after we… you know… they were saying that you hooked up with Yugeom. And after the thing with Jimin’s company happened and you fucked up Tae’s application… Well it was quite believable.” He exhaled all in once.

“Ohh, it was believable. So you all preferred to hear everything from someone else, and not your best friend huh?” sarcasm was back.

“We were stupid Y/N” Jimin came a step closer.

“I swear if you say that one more time, I will hurt you again Jimin” your voice cracked.

“Yeah, no shit, you were stupid. The three of you betrayed me and I was hurting. In the worst time of my life, you weren’t there because your ego was more precious. So excuse me for fucking not wanting to see you ever again? Or for kicking your ass, when you come out of nowhere, and all you say is “sorry”?” you were now shouting, and none of the boys were looking at you, except for a pair of curious eyes, that belonged to the other boy you forgot existed for a little while.

You turned your head away from him.

“So all you can say is nothing. Huh?” you scream at them once again.

You hear a quiet sob and saw that Jimin’s cheeks were now stained. He was crying.

“You have no idea” he really was crying. “How empty our lives were without you Y/N”.

“We all left the universities we got into, and came here to look for you… and beg you to forgive us.” Tae added.

Silence. Another pair of eyes also looked at you with sadness in them. Jungkook.

“Don’t expect me. To forgive you, just because you came back.” You said quietly.

“We are not expecting that.”

“Don’t expect things to be like before all of a sudden.” You added.

“We are not, just please. Just give us a chance?”

You didn’t give an answer. Just turned around to look for some food. Because for some reason. You were hungry. The burning pit in your stomach was not there, and all you wanted to do was eat something, which made you chuckle at the ways your body reacted.

Even though you knew you couldn’t forgive them all of a sudden, you knew you also made mistakes. Now that you knew they were aware of the pain they caused you, you felt ease in your gut. And you knew you missed them.

After you finally found a piece of pizza at the back of the table, you turned around with a softer smile.

“You are a bunch of assholes,” you breathed out and you saw their faces relax, as if they’ve been let of from a death sentence.

“So… I don’t want to ruin the moment… but. Was the black Mercedes down your car” asked the boy with the bleached hair who was now sitting by the window.

“Yeah, why?”

“Well… while you were speaking about your life struggles or whatever, they picked it up.” He stated.

“They what?” you blinked at his direction.

“Parking around his is illegal baby, so I don’t know why you did it, but they picked up your car and left.” He shrugged and moved away from the window.

“And you didn’t feel the need to tell me?!?” you shouted at him.

“I didn’t want to ruin the moment, sweetheart? And imagine if it wasn’t your car and someone else’s. Now is the car more important than friendship, I don’t think so” he said smiling, and it was obvious that he was mocking you by now.

“Go to hell…” you sighed, while picking out the phone from your pocket and calling Hoseok.

He picked just after one ring.

“Hey babe” his soothing voice came from the other side of the line.

“Hey” you said thankful for finally hearing something neither annoying, nor painful.

“How did it go, where are you?” he asked.

“I’m good… but, my car got picked up. Will you come a pick me up and I’ll tell you everything later” you said.

“No problem baby, just send me the address, and I’ll be there,” he assured you.

“Thank you” you said and hung up.

You lifted your eyes up and they fell once again on that odd boy. There was something about him that reminded you of someone. The way he moved and talked, laid back. And the way he would always pick up small fights with you, even though you had barely talked to him. He reminded you of… of…

Hoseok?

…

Yoongi?

He visibly noticed the way your eyes widened as you were staring at him.

“What’s wrong baby?” he asked trying to sound calm, but it was obvious that for the first time tonight, you made him a bit nervous.

“Do you… by any chance… know a person, named Hoseok?” you barely said and by Yoongi’s reaction, you knew he did.

“I do. Do you?” he asked again trying to sound careless, but failing.

In that, very second you heard the doorbell ring and the door opened, with the voice of Hobi coming from the hallway. You got up from the table and half ran towards the hallway, just to almost crash into Hoseok. He reacted in the last second, seeing you and opening his arms to catch you. Before you could say anything or to warn him, he moved closer and locked lips with you, silencing even the quiet music in the background.

When he pulled away, your legs feeling like jello, his eyes fell on the audience, and for the tenth time that day, you were in a room with people, absolutely unaware of what to do, in order to get a 100% on that chapter of life.

A/N: I hope anyone who read it, enjoy it, thanks for taking the time / I will try to upload much more often I promiiise + Its going to get much more hardcore and exciting, so I hope you will like it in the future as well <3

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the-jade-cross · 4 years

Text

Fairy of Hogwarts - Chapter 4

(FOURTH YEAR) (DURING THE GOBLET OF FIRE)

Arya was returning to Hogwarts! She had spent the summer back home with her family and had even invited Harry, Ron and Hermione over for a week or two to have some fun. It was a lovely summer and Arya had grown. She had gotten a little taller, her hair had gotten longer and she had resorted to straightening her hair sometimes for a change.

She was seated at the Ravenclaw table between Cho and Luna. The two were complimenting Arya on how good she looked in long hair and out it really brought out the blue in her eyes. Just then, Arya noticed Seamus, Harry and Ron tense at the Gryffindor table. Turning, she looked and saw that Draco Malfoy, Pansy, Crabb and Goyle had just entered the hall.

Arya rolled her eyes and looked away, noting that Luna was giving her a surprised look, "Since when did you hate Malfoy?"

"Since when did I like him?" Arya inquired.

Luna shrugged, "it seemed like you two were on okay terms the past two years. What happened?"

"Plenty," Arya hissed.

"You know Buckbeak is alive now because Harry and Hermione went back in time," Luna pointed out.

"But Draco still ratted out to his dad about it and he wasn't the least bit sorry," Arya snapped quietly. "It will take a miracle for me to forgive him.'

"Well then don't look now," Cho whispered, "Cuz he's looking this way."

Arya glanced over her shoulder and sure enough, his piercing gray eyes were watching her intently from beneath his eyebrows. Arya turned around and glared.

"I've had just about enough of this."

With that, she got up and headed over to the Gryffindor Table. She plopped down beside Hermione and instantly Seamus sat on the other side of her, Ron and Harry across from them.

"What's going on?" Fred and George asked as they approached the girl from behind. "Luna talking your ear off?"

Arya shook her head, "Malfoy boring a hole in the back of my head."

At once, Seamus, Harry and Ron glared at the Slytherin table and inched closer to Arya.

"I just want to wring his neck so badly sometimes," Ron whispered.

Arya chuckled just before Hermione spoke up, "So, I wonder what we're going to be learning with Professor Mcgonagal today. She wont tell a soul about what it is all about."

TIME SKIP

Arya was on her way to classes when she almost collided with Hermione and Ron who looked like they were in a hurry.

"What happened?"

"During the quidditch game," Ron explained. "Harry got his arm badly hurt. We have to hurry."

Arya didn't even wait another second and grabbing their hands, dragged them to the medical bay. When they burst in, Madam Pomfrey was bringing Harry different articles to help with the pain. Draco was surrounded by Slytherin's while he moaned over a small sprained wrist.

"Oh you can go Mr. Malfoy," Pomfrey groaned. "Oh that bludger seriously broke some bones Mr. Potter."

"Madam Pomfrey," Arya cried, bursting into the room with Ron and Hermione, "What happened?"

"Just a bludger to the arm Ar," Harry replied. "it's nothing."

Arya brushed it off, "It's not nothing. here let me."

She ran her fingers over his arm and cringed. "We'll need to reset it. You'll be in a sling for class with Mcgonagal later."

Harry shrugged, "No way I can avoid it."

Arya backed out of the way as Pomfrey began to wrap Harry's arm and splinting it.

"Can you check on Mr. Malfoy Arya dear?" Madam Pomfrey asked. "he wont stop groaning and he refuses to leave."

Arya rolled her eyes and looked at Ron, Seamus and Harry who were all glaring at the Slytherin. No way she could avoid it. Stomping over to the bed, she crossed her arms and considered the sight.

Draco was lying on the bed, nursing his arm. Crabb, Goyle and Blaise were standing around the bed and Pansy was sitting next to him, fawning over him and petting his hair.

"Doesn't seem like you're in any pain," Arya remarked, raising an eyebrow.

Blaise tried to not smirk. While Draco found it virtually impossible to even talk to Arya without one of the boys shooing him away, Blaise was one of the few Slytherins that the Gryffindors allowed Arya to talk to. When Arya began to ignore Draco since last year, Blaise had spent more time especially during break with Arya and had found her quite interesting to talk to.

"You kidding me?" Draco whined. "I think it's broken."

Arya rolled her eyes and walked over. She gripped his arm and ignored the whimper he let out. Just by looking at it she knew it was just dislocated. Rubbing his shoulder, she ignored the annoyed look on Pansy's face.

"Just dislocated," she remarked before snapping it back into place.

Draco let out a yelp at the pop but felt immediately annoyed at Arya's keen sense of healing because now she was walking off back to Harry. That blasted Potter got everything!

"You can leave now Malfoy!" Arya called over her. "I would also wash your hair if I were you. I don't think Pansy washed her hands after breakfast."

There was a snicker that ran up from the other end of the room where Arya and the Gryffindors were standing around Harry. Pansy at once tangled her fingers in Draco's hair but he brushed her off. Why would she never leave him alone? didn't she see that he liked Arya?

As Arya was cleaning up the room before class with Mcgonagal, Dumbledore stepped into the Medical Bay.

"Hello Arya, I was hoping I would find you here."

"Hello professor," Arya greeted. "How may I help you?"

"How is Tinkerbell?" Dumbledore asked.

Arya looked down at her cat who now lived in the Medical bay, "Alright. The kittens will arrive any day now."

Dumbledore smiled, "Babies are always a joy to the heart. Anyway, I came here because I was wondering if you would be interested in doing a dance routine with your brothers."

"What kind?" Arya inquired. "And what for?"

"Well I was going to let you find out at class tomorrow but I should tell you anyway. The Yule Christmas ball is coming up and I wanted it to be special this year what with Harry being here and all."

Arya nodded, "I think we can figure something out."

Dumbledore smiled, "Thank you dear. Now hurry to class."

Filch was messing with the speaker again and it was making Arya chuckle whenever Mcgonagal got interrupted by a blaring squeak.

"The Yule ball has been a tradition of..." she glared at Filch and raised her voice so that he stopped. "the twiwizard tournament since its inception. On Christmas Eve night, we and our guests gather in the great hall for a night of well mannered frivolity."

Arya looked over at Fred and George who were sitting across the room from her with the other boys and found them both smirking. it wasn't going to be like that if they had anything to say about it.

"As representatives of the host school," Mcgonagal continued, "I expect each and every one of you to put your best foot forward and I mean this literally because the Yule Ball is first and foremost.... a dance."

AT once, the girls began to whisper together and the boys began to groan. Arya just sat there, not surprised because of the warning she had gotten from Dumbledore.

"SILENCE!" Mcgonagal called. "The house of Godrick Gryffindor has commanded the respect of the Wizard world for nearly 10 centuries. I will not have you in the course of a single evening besmirching that name by behaving like a babbling bumbling band of baboons."

Arya hid a smirk when she saw Fred and George whisper something which she could only guess was something to do with Mcgonagal's tongue twister.

"Now to dance," she continued, "Is to let the body breathe inside every girl a secret swoon slumbers longing to burst forth and tight flight."

Ron was whispering something with Seamus when Mcgonagal turned on him, "Inside every boy a lordly lion prepared to prance. Mr. Weasley."

"Yes?" the boy muttered with fear.

"Will you join me please?" Mcgonagal asked, pulling the boy up without getting an ascent from him.

Harry gave Ron a shove and smirked, grinning across the room at Arya who was trying to not laugh at Ron's horrified face.

"Now," Mcgonagal said once she got Ron in the middle of the room, "Place you right hand on my waist."

"What?" Ron whispered, earning a snort from Arya which made Harry and Seamus grin bigger.

"On my waist," Mcgonagal replied.

Fred and George let out a wolf whistle when Ron obeyed and Arya hid her eyes, trying to not laugh.

Filch turned on the music and Mcgonagal began to lead Ron through the dance. Fred and George were mocking Ron, humming and swaying to the music.

Arya grinned and George winked at her, smirking. He knew she found it just as amusing as they did.

"Everyone come together!" Mcgonagal called.

The girls got up but the boys, except Neville, refused to rise. Arya trotted over to the boys and grabbed Austen and Aiden by the hands, shoving the two in Luna and Hermione's direction. They knew she would have their heads if they didn't dance so they pulled the two girls into the dance. Soon, almost all the boys and girls were dancing.

Arya spied Draco who was slowly making his way towards her, Pansy practically hanging on him. She wasn't going to dance with him so she approached Harry who was still dancing.

"Come on Harry," she invited.

"I'm horrible at dancing," Harry pointed out.

Arya smiled and pulled him up by his good hand, "Well then it wont hurt to practice."

Even though Harry only had one hand, Arya shifted so that she could hold his free hand and put her other on his shoulder. She smiled up at him and they began laughing and chuckling together about Ron and Mcgonagal. Soon Fred and George.... who for some reason were dancing together instead of with girls, came over and whispered something.

"We're so never going to let Ron live this one down."

Arya smirked and just then, the music stopped and all the students froze.

"Everyone, please take your seats," Mcgonagal called. "I would like to announce something."

Everyone sat back down but Arya knew what was going to happen. She looked across the way at Aiden, Austen, Asher and Axel who were looking back at her. She had warned them about the dance they had to perform together in front of everyone at the ball.

"Dumbledore has decided that we will be having a slight change to the ball. it has never happened that we have had a dance performance but it came to our attention that in our midst we had five incredibly talented dancers. In that case, The Gerasimov Family will be performing a dance performance in front of the whole school and our guests nearing the end of the ball."

At once, all eyes fell on the Gerasimov kids, most of them on Arya.

"Aiden, Austen, Asher and Axel. Please come forward. Arya."

Arya stood up and approached Filch. The man smiled at her and stepped back as she changed the song. She and her brothers hadnt gotten a chance to practice but there was a dance that they had performed together: Rewrite the Stars. It was originally only for two people but they had managed to make some really cool, intense dance moves for Aiden, Austen, Asher and Axel since Arya and Austen always did the main roles together.

She got it ready but paused it. She then approached her brothers who were all talking together.

"Ready guys?" she whispered.

The five siblings wrapped their arms around each other, bending their heads to talk.

"Just like Christmas three years ago," Arya whispered.

They all nodded and split up. Axel, Asher and Aiden all went to different parts of the center of the room, making a sort of triangle shape around Arya and Austen. Arya was Standing in the center of the triangle while Austen was outside. The dance consisted of Austen trying to get into the circle but Axel, Asher and Aiden constantly did complicated, fast dance moves, blocking his entrance until halfway through the song.

You know I want you It's not a secret I try to hide I know you want me

When Austen paused to let the music sink in, Arya glanced at the girls to see that practically all of them were practically swooning from Austen. He was an incredibly talented singer and one of the cutest guys in school. Arya pretended to be upset and torn, refusing to look at Austen. Whenever he began to walk around the circle, she kept moving so that her back stayed facing him.

So don't keep saying our hands are tied You claim it's not in the cards Fate is pulling you miles away And out of reach from me But you're here in my heart So who can stop me if I decide That you're my destiny?

Arya had walked towards the opposite side of the circle but she stopped. She looked up at Aiden who was right in front of her. He winked, telling her that she was doing great. Just then, Austen got inside the circle but Aiden took both of Arya's hands and tossed her through the air. She did a clean spin and landed lightly on her feet, outside the circle.

What if we rewrite the stars? Say you were made to be mine Nothing could keep us apart

Austen rushed towards her but Aiden blocked him by doing a dance move, keeping Austen trapped inside the circle while Arya began to walk around the circle on the outside, watching Austen. Suddenly she ran forward straight at Asher's back but her brother opened his legs so she could slide under. As she slid under, he reached down and grabbed her hands, pulling her through and pulling her to her feet.

Arya landed perfectly right in front of Austen who looked at her, smiling.

You'd be the one I was meant to find It's up to you, and it's up to me No one can say what we get to be So why don't we rewrite the stars? Maybe the world could be ours Tonight

Arya had pretended to act like she was relenting but out of nowhere she did a clean backflip and landed on Aiden's shoulders before doing another backflip and landing on the high ledge right behind the girls. All the students gasped at how well she did it and didn't even fall.

You think it's easy

You think I don't want to run to you

But there are mountains And there are doors that we can't walk through

All the students, especially the boys had their mouths dangling open at Arya's amazingly strong, mature singing voice. Just as the next part continued, she jumped clean into the air and grabbed onto the chandelier, dangling there by one hand while she looked down at Austen who was looking at her, pretending to be upset.

I know you're wondering why

Because we're able to be Just you and me Within these walls

She spun around, still keeping a grip on the chandelier till she did a clean cartwheel and landed on the outside of the circle.

But when we go outside

You're going to wake up and see that it was hopeless after all

Arya took a running start and jumped straight at Aiden who turned, grabbed her hand and her waist and spun her around his body like a swing dancing style.

No one can rewrite the stars

How can you say you'll be mine? Everything keeps us apart

Arya let go of Aiden and landed right in front of Austen. She reached up and stroked his face before spinning away.

And I'm not the one you were meant to find

Aiden caught her again but this time threw her far up. Arya did a clean jump and landed on the bench between Harry and Ron who were seated on the highest bench, startling both of them.

It's not up to you

It's not up to me When everyone tells us what we can be How can we rewrite the stars? Say that the world can be ours Tonight

As they began to sing the next part, Austen did a clean summersault and landed on the bench by the girls, gaining squeals of joy from the girls as the two began to sing together.

All I want is to fly with you

All I want is to fall with you So just give me all of youIt feels impossible (it's not impossible) Is it impossible?

Right then they both jumped and both caught hold of the chandelier, wrapping an arm around each other and swinging around till their heads were almost swimming with dizziness.

Say that it's possible

How do we rewrite the stars? Say you were made to be mine? Nothing can keep us apart 'Cause you are the one I was meant to find

Arya let go of the chandelier and held onto Austen's hand till he let go and she went flying. Aiden caught her easily and swung her around so she was on the ground. Austen let go and landed firmly on the ground.

It's up to you

And it's up to me No one can say what we get to be And why don't we rewrite the stars? Changing the world to be ours

The two had begun to dance a rather fast, complicated dance routine together in the center of the circle.... till the music died down and they stood about five feet from each other, Austen holding out his hand. Arya's haunting voice came out in soft whispers.

You know I want you

It's not a secret I try to hide But I can't have you We're bound to break and my hands are tied

Arya's hand had been extended, about to take Austen's hand but she pulled it back and turning, walked out of the circle. The moment they stopped, the girls began to wail at how beautiful it was and the five siblings all went around and gave each other high fives.

"That is just a glimpse of what we will be seeing at the Yule Ball," Mcgonagal explained. "I expect most of you to give the Gerasimov family ideas and inspirations about the origin and style of the dance. That way it will suit everyone's imaginations."

Austen grinned and pulled his sister in for a hug, "That was awesome AR!"

"Thanks," Arya whispered, "You've still got it in you."

Hermione and Luna charged over and drew the girl in for bone breaking hugs while Ron, Seamus, the twins and Harry approached.

"That was brilliant," Ron pointed out.

"We have a problem though," Seamus whispered.

At once, the siblings and friends were listening.

"Draco wouldn't stop staring."

They all peered over Seamus's shoulder to see that indeed, Draco was still sitting between Goyle and Crabb.... his eyes fixed on Arya.

Draco was working hard on making the Potter Stinks stickers. His eyebrows were down, he was gnawing his lip and frowning.

"What's your problem?" Blaise inquired.

"nothing," Draco replied.

Blaise chuckled. "You've been acting funny ever since dance practice yesterday. What's the deal?"

"Arya's the deal," Draco replied. "I cannot get her out of my head."

"Why don't you ask her to the ball then?" Blaise inquired.

"YOu're kidding right?" Draco asked, looking up, "She practically hates me! Besides, there are a dozen boys asking her to go with them every class!"

"So that's what's on your mind," Blaise teased, "Afraid someone will get to her before you?"

Draco didn't answer and went back to work.

"Well you'll never know unless you ask her," Blaise said. "And with the deal of her hating you. Why don't you just apologize?"

Draco sighed, "I guess I should... I just don't know how to talk to her without one of those Gryffindors getting in the way."

"Well I'll help you," Blaise offered. "The others are going to hogsmeade before the tournament starts and I'm sure Potter is going with Granger and Seamus. Weasley has been avoiding him. I'll distract Ron, you get to Arya."

Draco nodded, "Okay... when I'm done."

"No, now," Blaise ordered. "The early bird gets the worm!"

"I hate you sometimes," Draco muttered.

TIME SKIP

True to Blaise's word, Draco found Arya alone outside. Potter and Granger were nowhere to be found and Weasley was also scarce. there were a bunch of other students but so far, no one that posed a problem.

Arya was sitting on a stone bench reading when Draco approached and sat down next to her.

"Hey," he greeted.

Arya didn't reply but kept reading, purposely ignoring him.

"Look Arya.... I wanted to apologize," Draco said, too quiet for anyone but Arya to hear.

Arya snorted. "That's a new one."

"It was unfair of me to rat to my dad about Buckbeak," Draco continued. "I didn't know he meant so much to you... and I know I was a jerk in liking the idea but... I'm really sorry I hurt you."

Arya shrugged and continued to read, "What possessed you to apologize after almost a full year?"

Draco swallowed his saliva and found his mouth going dry, "I know I'm rotten to some people... I'm not exactly upset about being rotten to Potter but I cannot bear seeing you upset and... I miss talking to you... and being your friend."

"We were never really friends," Arya pointed out, "For that very reason, because you make it very difficult to like you even as a friend."

Draco ducked his head, knowing she was right. Arya closed her book and looked at him, "But not impossible. Apology accepted."

Draco looked up, his face lighting up and he smiled, "Thanks AR."

The girl smiled, liking how her nickname sounded coming from him.

"I was uh... wondering..." Draco continued. "If you would like to go to the ball with me?"

Arya's smile at once disappeared but to one of disappointment, "oh I'm sorry Draco... I already have a date."

"Oh... you... do?" Draco stuttered. "Oh right.... I probably should have seen that coming..."

Arya smiled and placed her hand on his shoulder, "I'm sorry."

Draco shook his head, "No it's fine... I understand...Uh...see you later."

With that he got up. he really didn't want to leave for he was liking being on good terms with Arya again but his face was going red from embarrassment and rage at himself for being too late. He collided with Blaise halfway to the dungeons.

"Well?" Blaise asked.

"She accepted my apology," Draco replied. "We're on good terms.... but she already has a date."

"Oof," Blaise remarked. "Too bad. Well that's a good start mate. Baby steps."

Draco nodded, "baby steps."

TIME SKIP

When Arya came back outside later after lunch, she saw that almost all the students were outside. Harry looked really annoyed as he stormed in Draco's direction... not good!

Arya held her books and backpack in her arms as she watched Harry approach Draco and begin to yell at him about something.

"hey Arya," Crabb called. "Want one?"

He held out a sticker that said: Support Cedric Diggory. Oh it was a badge supporting Diggory. She was about to nod when she saw that the badge changed to: Potter Stinks.

Feeling the fury rise in her cheeks, Arya stormed away from a puzzled Crabb. She had just approached the scene, knowing full well what it was about when she saw Professor Moody change Draco into a ferret!

Many of the students began to laugh or gasp in shock as Professor Moody made Draco the Ferret float in the air.

"Professor!" Mcgonagal cried, "is that a student!?"

"Actually it's a ferret," Moody replied.

"Change him back at once!" MCgonagal ordered.

Moody obeyed and changed Draco back.... but Draco then changed back into a ferret.

"Oh dear," Mcgonagal remarked. "The spell must have backfired. We need to take him to the hospital wing."

the professor looked around till she caught sight of Arya, "Arya dear! I need your help!"

Arya walked over and considered the white ferret who was looking up at her mournfully.

"I need you to get Mr. Malfoy to the medical bay and hopefully get this spell off of him," Mcgonagal explained.

Arya nodded before flashing Harry a grin. Harry returned it and smiled. Arya put her books in her back, slinging it on her back and knelt down in front of the ferret.

"Really?" she asked the ferret, putting her hands on her hips, "Will you ever learn when it's enough?"

Draco gave her big brown puppy eyes and Arya rolled her eyes, "Don't give me puppy eyes because you're a ferret. You're lucky that I don't leave you here to deal with it yourself."

With that, she reached down and picked the ferret up and held him in one arm. As she walked towards the medical bay, she realized that she was carrying Draco... in the form of a ferret. It didn't register till Draco sat up in her arm and looked at her.

"Oh stop it," she remarked sternly. "Don't think that I'm carrying you that we're good. We're just on speaking terms right now."

Draco tried his best to look hurt but it failed miserably. When they got to the medical bay, Madam Pomfrey was busy behind a curtain with another injured student so Arya took the other curtained off area and set the ferret on the bed.

"Let's see," Arya remarked, pouring some ingredients into a cup, "This should do it."

With that she held the cup low and Draco drank it, Ferret style. When he finished Arya set the cup down and considered the ferret a moment. She saw Draco try to scratch the back of his head but failed so she did it for him.

"You're cute," she remarked before realizing what she had said.

The ferret almost smirked and Arya rolled her eyes, "As a ferret. You should just stay a ferret permanently. I might like you better for it."

Draco pretended to pout and Arya smirked before a soft mewing sound caught her attention. Turning, she saw that Tinkerbell was lying in the corner on her mat... and with her were four brand new kittens!

"Oh Tink!" the girl remarked softly, coming to kneel down beside the cat, "They're so cute!"

With that, she gathered up the kittens and held them gently in her arms.

She was just trying to think of names when she felt a presence behind her. Turning, she saw that Draco was back to his normal, self sitting on the edge of the bed. He was only wearing his shirt, pants, shoes and sweater vest, not his long robe. His hair was slightly messed up and Arya had to admit, he was pretty good looking like that.

"So I'm cute huh?" he asked smirking.

Arya rolled her eyes, "As a ferret yes."

"Admit it though, I'm cute as a man too."

Arya chuckled, "In your dreams Malfoy."

"So what are their names?" he inquired, kneeling down beside her.

"I haven't decided yet," Arya replied.

"Well there's four of them. Why not name them after the seasons?" he inquired.

"Winter, Summer, Spring and Autumn," Arya said, considering each kitten, "I like it!"

Draco smiled, something Arya hadn't seen before and she felt her cheeks go pink, thinking how cute he looked when he smiled.

The two just looked at each other a moment before Draco reached out and slowly placed one hand on her hand, tracing her knuckles with his thumb.

"Arya i..." he said softly. "I... I really like you."

Arya smiled, "I like you too."

Draco felt his heart jump but he could tell by how she said it that she didn't understand, "No I mean i.... like you.... I mean really like you...."

When he looked at Arya, her face had gone slightly pale, then slightly red but not from a blush but from anger. She pulled her hand away from Draco and set the kittens down.

"you should have thought of that before you ruined our friendship."

"I apologized for Buckbeak," Draco pointed out.

"THIS HAS NOTHNG TO DO WITH BUCKBEAK!" Arya shouted. "This has to do with how horribly you have treated everyone and everything! Harry, Hermione, Ron, Luna, the professors... everyone!"

"But Arya that's not you," Draco pointed out.

"ARGH!" Arya shouted, "Are you seriously that thick? What makes you think I'll ever like you back if you treat everyone else with contempt! You don't get what you want Draco if you treat only the things you care about with care and kindness! Until you learn how to treat others like you want to be treated, this... between us will never happen."

With that the girl got to her feet and stormed out of the room while shouting over her head, "AND THOSE STICKERS YOU MADE ARE RIDICULOUS! IF YOU HADNT MADE THEM, YOU WOULDNT HAVE BEEN TURNED INTO A FERRET!"

As she slammed the door behind her, Draco cringed and looked at the cats to see TInkerbel glaring at him.

"What have I done?"

They were dance rehearsing again. Draco was practically in limbo for Pansy wouldn't let him go. She was basically hanging on his arm with all her might, squealing whenever he looked at her and glaring at all the girls who swooned at the sight of Draco.

However, Draco's mind was at the other side of the dance room where Arya was dancing calmly with Seamus. Draco had grown to not mind Harry or Seamus mostly because he knew they were just protective of Arya but Ron was just downright aggravating.

Seamus spun the girl around and Arya giggled, her face brightening up when she smiled.

"Draco," Pansy whined, "What is wrong with you?"

Pansy wasn't the only one who noticed Draco's lack of concentration for Mcgonagal stepped over to him and summoned Blaise over.

"Mr. Zabini, would you mind dancing with Miss Parkinson today?"

Blaise was about to complain but he got the feeling that there was a good reason so he obliged. Draco was left alone with the professor who nudged him in the direction of Arya who had gone to sit down to have a break while Seamus danced with Ginny.

Draco expertly made his way through the crowd till he was approaching Arya. when he came to stand in front of her, Arya refused to look up at him.

"Arya," he whispered.

"What?" she asked in a whisper, looking up at him.

"Would you like to dance?" he asked.

They just stood there, looking at each other, neither speaking till almost every student had left. Soon, the room was absolutely empty. Draco held out his hand and Arya hesitantly took it.

His soft, pale hand slipped around hers and Arya felt electricity shoot through their hands when warm met cold. Draco gently drew her into the center of the room, his eyes never leaving hers and slipped his arm around her waist.

Arya felt all the air slip out of her at the feeling of his hand around her waist. Draco slowly led her around the room. there was no music but neither seemed to notice or care.

Every few steps, Draco seemed to either draw Arya closer to him, or Arya didn't notice that his face was slowly nearing hers. She suddenly realized how much shorter she was compared to him, barely reaching his chin. His head was bowed, his eyes looking straight into hers and his eyes never wavering even when she glanced down.

"So who are you going to the ball with?" he asked in a whisper.

When he spoke in a whisper, his voice sounded so soft and gentle and Arya felt her cheeks go pink, "G....George..."

"George Weasley?" Draco inquired, his voice still in a whisper but slightly louder. "Why him?"

"Because he asked me," Arya replied. "I didn't want to wait and decline anyone because if I kept declining, there wouldn't be anyone else I could go with.... so I decided to go with him."

"Who else asked you?" Draco asked, trying to not let his voice drip with jealousy.

He knew that Fred and George were like big brothers to Arya so George had probably only asked her out of kindness and had offered to go with a friend which was basically what had happened.

"No one that I knew," Arya replied. "Which was why I turned them down..."

Draco quietly cleared his throat, not lifting his eyes to look at her, "Would you have gone with me if George hadn't asked you first?"

Arya lifted her beautiful eyes and looked up at the Slytherin. Honestly, she had been shocked he had asked her especially since over the course of just a day he had also admitted his feelings so she had been overwhelmed.... but now that she thought about it, She wouldn't have minded.

"I don't know...."

Draco let out a breath he didn't know he was holding and he felt his heart sink, "Can i.... have a dance with you at the ball then?"

Arya seemed to think about it before a smile appeared on her face and she released herself from Draco's strong but gentle grip, "You've got to sing for it."

Draco was about to object but then he saw the excited, interested look on the girl's face. She wanted to see if he could sing.... well nothing bad happened from trying.

Arya went to the boom box and quickly turned on a new track which was a rather fast, upbeat cello song. There was a moment while the music played while Draco just tried to remember the words.... then looking at Arya across the room from him... it all just came out perfectly.

(SONG: Smooth Criminal)(START AT 0.56 and stop it at 2.54:)) I have no rights to the song. It's from the movie GLEE)

When they stopped, both were slightly out of breath and were about three inches away from each other. There was a smirk on Draco's face and Arya was smiling.

"Alright. One dance," the girl promised. "How come you didn't tell me you could dance?"

Draco shrugged, "Never thought I was any good."

Arya smiled and shook her head, "we always think we're really bad at something when we're actually good at it. Never let your mind get the best of you Draco."

With that, she was gone, leaving a stunned and overjoyed Draco behind.

The Yule ball had arrived and Arya was freaking out. She was excited to go with George but she was so excited for all the dancing, the performance she had to with the boys and she couldn't wait to see what the great hall looked like!

As she stood before the mirror, dabbing a minimal amount of makeup on, Luna burst in with Cho behind her. both were already dressed, having dressed ahead of time for a reason unknown.

"Come on! We need to try on your dress before we do your hair!" Luna cried, grabbing her hand.

As the two girls dragged her back into their room, Arya stuttered. "I didn't know you two were put in charge of preparing me.... I can Dress myself."

"Nonsense," Both remarked, "You are going to be performing in front of everyone with your brothers! You need to look perfect! Besides, after your little showdown with Draco the other day, boys have been preparing to ask you for a dance."

Arya's eyebrows shot up, "Who knows about the showdown?"

"Almost the whole school," Cho replied. "Seamus, Ron and Harry went looking for you after practice and when they saw you still in there with Draco, they held back. Ron was seething but Seamus and Harry seemed rather surprised. they made Ron promise to not get onto you about it because he was almost prepared to lock you in your room so you wouldn't go to the ball and run into Draco."

"Does he hate me that much?" Arya asked.

"Oh he doesn't hate you, he hates Malfoy," Hermione said as she entered, wearing a stunning pink dress.

"Mione you look gorgeous!" the three squealed.

Hermione smiled, "Thanks! Now let's make you look better!"

With that, the girl was pulled down into a chair and Hermione busied about doing her hair. Cho got onto her makeup and Arya was glad it wasn't Luna because even though Luna never used makeup, whenever she did someone's makeup, she put too much on but Cho put just the right amount and she knew how to make it match your outfit and your eyes.

Luna got about bringing out Arya's dress which was a rich dark blue.

"So how did the whole school find out about the dance with Draco?" Arya inquired.

"Well Ron couldn't keep his voice down in class today. Luckily, it was just us Gryffindors and the Hufflepuffs," Hermione replied.

"Yeah and then word spread after that," Luna added. "Don't know if Draco knows that everyone knows."

"Well considering that I didn't know yet, chances are he doesn't," Arya remarked, feeling her cheeks go red. "Oh this is so embarrassing!"

"No it's not!" the three girls cried.

"Arya, you were absolutely spectacular during that dance war!" Cho remarked. "Harry and Seamus said they never saw anything like it and they had to admit, Draco was rather talented too and they even said you two sound perfect together! Ron was ticked when he heard them say that but he admitted that it was really cool. Now, all the boys within reasonable age are dying to dance with you!"

"But I have to sing!" Arya groaned. "And now everyone has their hopes high."

"And well they should!" Ginny said as she stepped in, wearing a lovely green dress that brought out her red hair. "Arya, if you were able to sing that well at the last minute with Malfoy, you will do amazing tonight!"

Arya shook her head, "but I'll be in front of the whole school and the guests!"

"You sang in front of Malfoy." Ginny pointed out.

At once Arya went quiet and the four girls stopped their prepping to look at her. her cheeks had gone slightly red.

"But... I don't know... I was really nervous when we started singing but then.... Draco....I don't..."

The four girls knew why she was stammering. she knew that Draco was practically their enemy but Ginny jumped at the opportunity. Kneeling in front of her, she took Arya's hands.

"Ar. Listen to me. Malfoy may not be our best friend, but if he makes you happy, we're happy. He might be a brute and all, but not everyone is bad clear through unless their you know who. Listen. None of us thought the day would come when Draco showed a good, kind side but he did the moment he met you. The more he gets to know you, the more his good side comes out and that's not only a welcome to us, but it shows that everyone is good deep down."

"Right," Hermione added. "Don't feel guilty or embarrassed if you have feelings for Draco or if he makes you feel comfortable when you're performing. If that's the case, just think of him while you're performing."

Arya lifted her eyes and looked at Hermione and Ginny. She could talk to Luna and Cho about Draco occasionally because he knew they didn't have experience with him bullying but Ginny and Hermione were veterans of Draco's past bullying.

"You sure?"

the two girls smiled and nodded.

"Now let's get you dressed!"

When Arya emerged from the bathroom with Hermione who had gone in to help her zip up, the others gasped.

Her dress was floor length and got darker as it went up, turning black near the top with some silver. It had one strap sleeve, showing her fair skin that set off the blue perfectly. Her red hair matched the outfit perfectly and looked deep auburn. Her heels of course were hidden but kept her skirts off the ground. The pendent around her neck matched her dress (ignore the ring) and the earrings brought out the color of her eyes. Cho had done perfectly with her makeup and Hermione's hairdo for her was similar to her own put was perfect.

"You look perfect!" Luna squealed, rushing over to hug her.

"How do you dance in that?" Cho asked. "Didn't you say the dance with your brothers is kind of fast beat?"

Arya smiled, "Silly, I'm going to chance into my fast dancing dress halfway through. The performance isn't till the end."

Ginny walked over and drew the girl into a hug, "You're so beautiful Arya."

#draco x oc #Malfoy x oc #draco #malfoy #draco malfoy #draco Malfoy x oc #harry potter #hogwarts

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sophiacecilia-blog1 · 5 years

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Last year in FEU-Alabang

Just thinking about it makes me really sad. It makes me feel empty inside. Like going away from home. I used to hate the K-12 system because I thought it was another waste of time and my parents’ money. But it changed when I met HU03. Yes, the school was really shitty in its first year but my classmates and teachers made it manageable to survive. I would like to share first some of my unforgettable moments here in FEU.

!! LONG POST AHEAD !!

It all started here in this group chat. When I made this, we were like around 8 members in the group. We were just casually talking and complaining about the long summer and how few we were. As days go by, more members were added in the group and it started being noisy because everyone was getting to know each other and some were making fun of them already.

Finally!! The long wait was over and we’ve finally met each other. It was our general orientation. We were all quiet and shy at those times but eventually became loud and noisy when we hung out at the food court.

This was after the Canvas orientation. We went to a karaoke room and screamed out lungs out, It was really fun because we showed our goofy side. Though some of were still shy, which includes me, and just watched the others sing.

I think this was our first week and we were moving from room to room because our PE classroom wasn’t temporary and even our subject teacher was confused. In our first PE class, we shared a big room, which is now the library, with like 5 sections ?? and one section from the Grade 12. It was crazy. Everyone was so noisy. We were even grouped with people we don’t know and we had to show our talents in front. I was really embarassed that time but it was still fun. I met new people and made new friends.

PARTYYYYY!! First ever kick-off party of FEU Alabang. The only band I remembered who played at the party was Mayonnaise. I remembered when we were all dancing and singing along, Ri-an Yoto was busy eating her chao fan while dancing. We had a good night and a good laugh too.

Everyone was getting along and we were all close to each other. We are a family. And I loved how everyone were so happy teasing each other. Every vacant, we were just chilling and singing. Everything was perfect.

MS. XYLENE!!!!! Our first adviser whom we deeply love! She was very helpful and caring to us. The best adviser we’ve ever had. She was our 21st and Oral comm teacher. In our sched, we have 2hours oral comm and then 1hr 21st. She always gave us a snack break so we were energized in her class. I don’t know how to put into words how much we love Ms. Xylene. She made our first year in FEU really tolerable. Omg I think I’m gonna cry hahahha. But really tho, I remember when we were nervous and sad when we thought we were going to have a new adviser in 2nd sem. Oh and also we hated her at first, especially in the Canvas orientation. We haven’t met her yet that time because she was sick. She got mad at us because some of us were late in the orientation. But past is past, we love our Ms. Xylene!!

We survived the first final examinations in feu!!! It was really hard because we were all info overload. But we still passed all our subjects!! And of course we had to take a selfie while our super duper strict proctor was away hehe

Merry christmas!!! Can you believe that we had a christmas party with no aircon??? It was soooo hot yet we still enjoyed our first christmas party. We had a really fun game and there were a lot of delicious foods. Our ever so sweet adviser also gave us all a letter which made me cry cuz she is so sweet and she appreciates me.

Grade 12. New adviser. Two of our classmates left FEU and three transferees from other sections. Everything changed. The section that used to be so noisy every time is now quiet. We were separated and had different groups of friends. I miss the old HU03.

They are the ones who made my senior high life exciting. Without them, my life is boring. I can’t imagine myself hanging out with other people and not them. They make my every day so much better. We share everything. From water bottles to food to secrets and to stories. I think I’m going to cry my eyes out on our graduation day. I am not yet ready to leave.

Here are some of my favorite teachers that I really admire the most. You’re such a cool teacher and you understand your students. You try to adjust the deadline of our school works and we love you for that huhu you r rlly da best sir!! I’m going to miss you so much sir esp. your jokes and witty remarks. I remembered when of our classmates told you that CNF was going to be a boring subject and I kind of agreed because our creative writing last SY was boring. But it turned out that it was one of my fave subj because of u sir hehehe.

11th Grade was very hard and challenging. It was an emotional roller coaster ride. We had our ups and downs together but I know that it made us stronger. We went through a lot, from academic breakdowns to fast food delivery every lunch and low and high grades. I will never forget my 2 years in FEU-Alabang because this is where I learned a lot. I grew into a better person, became mentally and physically strong and I met my new family. I learned not just about the subject my teachers are teaching but also some helpful life advice. My friends, who were my rock and my sanity, will always have a special place in my heart. To Ri-an and Juliana, I am very thankful that they are my best friends. I can share everything I want to them and I know that they will not judge me, they will just bash me hahahhaha. Thinking that our happy days are almost over makes me really sad. I am so attached with them and I think I will cry so hard at our Graduation day. Sir Mckhy, if you are still reading this, I hope you stay so you could be with us at our graduation :((( Looking back at these photos are really nostalgic. A lot had happened and I will treasure every memories I made and will be making with everyone at FEU-Alabang. Here’s to more months to enjoy at FEU and I am looking forward to make another memories in our last year.

#sad cry cnf sirmckhystyx feualabang senioryear lastyear huhu

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manabingu · 7 years

Text

ManaTagged! Heyoo~

tagged by the sweet ♥ @rainbow-galaxy-supernova (sorry its overdue)

The last:

1.) Drink: Raspberry Milk Tea w/Lychee Popping Pearls

2.) Phone call: to @tyrestgwa earlier today via skype

3.) Text message: to @crystalwoodsart

4.) Song you listened to: Phoenix Ash’s Cover of JAP by Abingdon Boys School & Fome’s Cover of Count Zero by T.M. Revolution (SO FCKN GOOD)

5.) Time you cried: yesterday 8D during Wonder Woman ;U;o

6.) Dated someone twice: Tyrest is the first & only official dating. But me and @crystalwoodsart have been married practically since 6th grade. She is mY WAIFU!

7.) Been Cheated on: Thank Ra No!

8.) Kissed someone and regretted it: Nah.BUT I mean- iN DREAMS YES.

9.) Lost someone special: It’s a universal thing. Namely pets for me

10.) Been depressed: 8) Story of my LIFE! But I’ve been makin progress

11.) Gotten drunk and thrown up: I REFUSE to consume alcohol/drugs

12-14.) LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS: Turquoise,Galaxy Print,Pastels/Silver tie

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU…

15.) Made new friends: I’ve been blessed thanks to YT Idol w/new singer pals!

16.) Fallen out of love: Yeah...in high school I had so many talent crushes. Which I think is normal for theater kids. But I think I ended up with the correct person. He truly understands me. And though I sometimes wonder what would my life be if I had confessed my love to those others, I’m happy I waited for the person who accepted me just the way I am ;w;o

17.) Laughed until you cried: AS AN ABRIDGER, I am privileged to be surrounded by INCREDIBLY hilarious people & I love it!♥

18.) Found out someone was talking about you: YES. And BOY is it a trip when I find people are horrible trolls. I find out about sweet people who say super kind things about me or my work all the time. But when I get a heads up about backstabbers or people who get close for the wrong reasons, I put my guard up around them & just do my own thing. Because a path of jealousy, hatred & vengeance isn’t for me. Bullies can talk, but I’ll always ignore them.

19.) Met someone who changed you: Namely Tyrest,Crystal,Panda,Wraith10, @cozymochi (bows to her greatness), LordMoonstone, @kittykatsandbox, (FAB SENPAI) @ahsimwithsake & @laurathia who are 1 of 2 sets of adoptive internet parents I have XD and MOST RECENT OF ALL CEONN. If I hadn’t met Ceonn, my singing career journey wouldn’t have taken off.THANX

20.) Found out who your true friends are: YEP 8)! Sadly, just recently too...

21.) Kissed someone on your Facebook list: Well, hispanic people greet each other by cheek kisses so I will say yes.

22.) How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: Everyone cuz my FB is family & IRL friends only ^^; BUT my ZEXAL Abridged has a FB

23.) Do you have any pets: My pet cockatiel Patchos 8D

24.) Do you want to change your name: No, but don’t mind having a stage name to be honest. I love stage names ^_^

25.) What did you do for your last birthday: Probably sang,drew & other stuff

26.) What time did you wake up: 9 or 10ish? I had to meet some friends today

27.) What were you doing at midnight last night: GAWKING at Gal Gadot

28.) Name something you cannot wait for:Anime Idol @ Metrocon, finally getting out more song covers/abridged stuff. And being stable again.

29.) When was the last time you saw your mother?: a few seconds ago

30.) What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: I wish that ONE thing didn’t happen & my family had the same wealth we shoulda had if luck was on our side. That & I wish I wasn’t afraid of certain things so I could progress faster.

31.) What are you listening to right now: Fome’s Covers,& MY own covers

32.) Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: yeS?

33.) Something that is getting on your nerves: Hypocrites lately 8)

34.) Most visited website: Tumblr,Instagram,Twitter & YT are tied tbh

35-37.) Finished all of school: yeppers

38.) Hair color: Dark Chocolate Brown (I used swatches at Sally’s XD)

39.) Long or short hair: I enjoy having long princess hair, but I cut it recently QuQ woops. Mostly cuz I wanted to try a T.M. Revolution hairdo XD

40.) Do you have a crush on someone: I HAVE ANIMAY HUSbANDs/WAifUS

41.) What do you like about yourself: My voice range! I used to be SO self conscious as a kid, but eventually it became my greatest strength because it’s SO versatile it honestly I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for my unique voice QuQ

42.) Piercings: My ears have been pierced since birth. Mom wanted it

43.) Blood type: O? I think was what it was? It’s been years lol

44.) Nickname: Mana & Ginga (to my singer friends)

45.) Relationship status: Taken by Tyrest (with Crystal on the side ;D heh)

46.) Zodiac sign: I am a proud Sagittarius ♐

47.) Pronouns: Her is fine, but I don’t mind He if I’m crossplaying (mostly Ginga). It’s kind of a weird thing for me cuz I’m genderfluid ;w; but if anything to avoid confusion, just go with feminine one XD cuz whatvs???

48.) Favorite TV show: ITS HARD. I like too many things.Non-Anime TV Show wise I watch mostly Trail & Error & Fresh Off the Boat. But Anime-wise: ZEXAL (but YGO in general), Darker Than Black, One Punch Man/Mob Psycho 100, Uta no Prince-sama, Saint Seiya/Omega, Tokyo Mew Mew, Kaleido Star, anything by CLAMP, Kamen Rider Gaim/Fourze, Death Note, Attack on Titan, Tokyo Magnitude 8.0, FMA...too many...I know I have more...

49.) Tattoos: NoPe

50.) Right or left hand: Righty

FIRST…

51.) Surgery: In 8th grade I almost died 8D! Ruptured appendix, 3 consecutive operations & all because the first time I went to the emrgency they sent me home & misdiagnosed me with stomach flu 8D HAH.HAH.HAAAA ;~~~;...

52.) Piercing: Ears only as mentioned previously

54.) Sport:I don’t do any.My fave is figure skating tho. I love Yuzuru Hanyu♥

55.) Vacation: Technically me comin to the U.S for the first time counts

56.) Pair of trainers: Is that slang for shoes???...uhh??

MORE GENERAL…

57.) Eating: I ate sushi at a Chinese Buffet called Giant Panda today

58.) Drinking: finished all the boba tea ;w;

59.) I’m about to: Sleep cuz it’s 1am xD

61.) Waiting for: Good news, & replies from a few emails I sent this week

62.) Want: To make my YT Channel flourish & master my voice

63.) Get married: With luck but I think a paper doesn’t dictate if you love a person or not. BECAUSE i wanna pursue singing/acting, I know I’ll always be traveling ;w; so that decision is hard. I mean we can be OFFICIAL via the paper thingy but like, I already know we’re together XD ffff lol

64.) Career: Singer/Actor/Voice Actor & Internet Personality maybe

65.) Hugs or kisses: Both ^o^...cuz honestly I’m a fluffy person ;w;o

66.) Lips or eyes: Both again...I Can’T HElP IT (deep down my thoughts are as swirly with flirtatious things...proly explains Ginga’s mannerisms)

67.) Shorter or taller: I’m short ;w; sniffs 5′1. Everyone else is a tree

68.) Older or younger: Depends on relationship type? Like I think having a partner at a relatively older age because I am anxious af & need someone older to guide me when I’m struggling, but don’t mind younger (but MATURE) person by 2 years max. But when it comes to friends, I befriend anyone who is kind-hearted. Because we can learn a lot from elders/ our youth

70.) Nice arms or nice stomach: I don’t mind either or but TMR is @U@

71.) Sensitive or loud: I’m drawn more to sensitive people because they have higher levels of compassion & kinder hearts.

72.) Hook up or relationship: Relationship cuz I’m loyal AF

73.) Troublemaker or hesitant: Egh...both have downfalls. Hesitant is safer tho

HAVE YOU EVER…

74.) Kissed a stranger?: Nope BUT if I become an actor, that is a thought that keeps me up at night XD cuz ...again...I’m loyal af ;-;

75.) Drank hard liquor?: EWW >_>

76.) Lost glasses contact/lenses?: YES. During a musical in 10th grade (Suessical I was Cat in the Hat) I was on a trampoline and THEY FLEW OFF MY FACE! And ....we never found em O_O...they vanished....

77.) Turned someone down?: Yeah...a bunch of creepy fanboys throughout the years... 8) unfortunately the downfall of being an internet person

78.) Sex on first date?: DEPENDS. I’m demisexual, so I’m attracted to personality/emotional bonds not physical appearances. So IF my emotions towards them is high enough, I dunno if things could happen? But usually I stay reserved cuz I need to feel like I honestly love the person THAT much.

79.) Broken someone’s heart?: Probably ;w;...2 old buddies. I knew they had crushes on me...but I just didn’t feel the same way towards them -actually someone ELSE admitted they had a crush on me last month so the count is now up to 3...AGH. I WISH they can find someone who will make em happy because I think they deserve it tbh. They’re good dudes.

80.) Had your heart broken?: Once yeah, an old childhood crush was honestly insensitive when I asked him if he ever felt something for me & he said “ehhh not really?” in a way that came off as insensitive XD?....yeah. But the MORE I thought about why I liked him, the more I realized I could NEVER be in a relationship with them cuz they were immature & didn’t know how to be serious.They don’t balance goofiness & sensitivity & I need a balanced person

81.) Been arrested?: NO

82.) Cried when someone died?: waterfalls of tears cuz I’m an emotional wreck

83.) Fallen for a friend?: yeah =w= a bunch of abridgers/singers hah. I get talent crushes ALL the time, but don’t act on it cuz I’m shy AND taken XD

DO YOU BELIEVE IN…

84.) Yourself?: Usually...but I have many moments where I question if I’m good enough or worthy enough to be here ;w; gotta work on my Kattobingu

85.) Miracles?: Shining Draws should be real. But yeah miracles CAN happen

86.) Love at first sight?: FUYA OKUDAIRA 8D...and Takanori Nishikawa...and Mahiro Takasugi and Aoi Shouta tbh

87.) Santa Claus?: Elf is my favorite Christmas movie

88.) Kiss on the first date?: IT DEPENDS. But if it happens? AIGHT????

89.) Angels?: Yes \QwQ/! angels are real. @rosey-ballerina is one

OTHER….

90.) Current best friend’s name: Crystal is my bff & waifu but Tyrest too but honestly Kimmy, Panda & Ceonn are also tied with those 2

91.) Eye color: Brownies eUe

92.) Favorite movie: Finding Nemo, Big Hero 6,Lion King (all 3), All 3 Yu-Gi-Oh! Movies,The Emperor’s New Groove,Mrs. Doubtfire, Moana, Wonder Woman, Mary Poppins, Arrival, The Mummy, Matilda, Harry Potter, Pokemon 3,Hercules, Grave of the Fireflies, Antman, The Producers....and a few others

I tag: @t-chan @sylphwriter @eleanorose123 @ivmysterynumbers @zexalfangirl @shybunny @galaxyeyedphoton

#Mana Tagged #I HAVE A HARD TIME WIT FAVES TBH #I LIKE TOO MANY THINGS HONESTLY AGH ;w; sowies eeehhh I am indecisive AF

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delaneyanderson · 7 years

Text

ULTIMATE SHIP MEME!

Send in two (or more) names and I’ll fill all this out about the ship!

General:

How long will they last? - For a few months, then not at all, then forever.

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - Fall in love over a few months during the summer, but Laney denies it until loner.

How was their first kiss? - IT WAS GREAT and it led to killer sex and they were on the beach and had only met fifteen minutes before

Wedding:

Who proposed? - Mason ;_; In the airport. Like a piece of shit.

Who is the best man/men? - Dustin is best man, Davis and Lincoln and her brother Sam ;_;

Who is the braid’s maid(s)? - Daisy is maid of honor, and of course Ellie and Mallory (maybe??? maybe not) AND THEY DON’T ASK ABOUT FLOWER GIRL BUT IT’S LOLA.

Who did the most planning? - Laney, but honestly Daisy probably took it on as a job too when helping out. They were planning while in New York though so it was tough because they weren’t around to really look around at stuff - even though they end up getting married on the beach at Barney’s ;_;

Who stressed the most? -Daisy’s probably honestly more stressed than either one of the people actually getting hitched. But Laney.

How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? -Jake and Laney’s dad.

Sex:

Who is on top? - Both switch far too often.

Who is the one to instigate things? - Both of them. Mason’s extremely sexual but Laney is like the female counterpart and doesn’t need to wait for the guy to decide he wants to do it, she so casually just asks to do it.

How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now x10000

How kinky are they? - Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head!!!!!!

How long do they normally last? - So genuinely depends because it could be a quickie on his car that last five minutes or it could be hours of sex in bed all day not doing anything else.

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - I wouldn’t say equal but they’re very generous?

How rough are they in bed? - Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? - At least two - Ocean and then a girl but I also wouldn’t be surprised if like their second child ended up being twins.

How many children will they adopt? - Probably none - they’ve already adopted 500 dogs.

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - They share the work!!!

Who is the stricter parent? - Laney because she has that ‘do not fuck with me’ city attitude. But I wouldn’t say either are particularly ‘strict’

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - Laney because usually Mason is doing them with them. Ocean is 1000% a copy of Mason.

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - They both do! I also feel like Mason tends to be more of a stereotypical stay at home dad than Laney? Not that he IS but he’s much more domestic than say, Davis would be.

Who is the more loved parent? - NEITHER THEY’RE BOTH EQUALLY LOVED FUCK THIS QUESTION

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? Both of them! But I can envision in my head Laney meeting Mason there after work because they both want to be actively involved - Laney’s parents never were for her so she thinks its important her children know they care

Who cried the most at graduation? -Laney for sure

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - Mason because he knows everyone and will be like ‘sheriff he didn’t MEAN to do that come on let him off with a warning and i’ll ground him for two months’

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? - I feel like it’s Mason? I just imagine that being one of these secret talents of his. Laney probably can cook but she also probably just doesn’t want to. Definitely Mason.

Who is the most picky in their food choice? -Probably Laney. I don’t think she’s actually picky but I can see her being less open minded about food than he is. Like she probably has a hard time stomaching eating the fish she watches Mason catch.

Who does the grocery shopping? - They either take turns or go together.

How often do they bake desserts? - Laney, who doesn’t cook much, is going to want to constantly bake with her children and I’m not sure why. But otherwise it’s probably very rarely and they stick to ice cream out of the tub.

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - Meat, both of them.

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - Mason ;_;

Who is more likely to suggest going out? -Either of them, they’re pretty equal in social life activity.

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking? - I genuinely cannot decide. I want to say Mason because it SOUNDS like a Mason thing but I also feel like she doesn’t cook that often so probably Laney tbh.

Chores:

Who cleans the room? - Laney!

Who is really against chores? -Neither is against chores and they’re both going to love forcing their kids to clean up their messes cuz they’re lazy.

Who cleans up after the pets? - Mason predominantly because his dogs become his career, but she helps too.

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - Mason

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - Laney. She doesn’t mind when shit isn’t together when it’s just them but if people are coming over she’s like ‘okay it looks like we killed someone because neither of us ever cleaned up that spaghetti bowl that dropped where’s the bleach i need to cover up this murder!!’

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - Mason and then he was stupidly excited about it too and told everyone

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - Laney definitely enjoys a nice relaxing bath - especially future mom!Laney. Although they both enjoy long showers/baths together ;)

Who takes the dog out for a walk? - They take them together!! They always walk them around the beach together at night while they catch up on each other’s day.

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - I feel like Mason takes a lot of pride in decorating the house but probably mostly for Christmas tbh - he’s probably in on the decorating/best house competitions

What are their goals for the relationship? - To basically become Ocean and have the happiest, stress free life doing what they love together on their island and always having each other as a best friend and life partner.

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - Both of them. Even when they’re parents like if they had a babysitter the night before cuz they went out and got trashed with their group of friends they’d like try to sleep in and cry silently when the kids burst in in the mornings and start jumping on the bed.

Who plays the most pranks? -Mason. No questions asked. Laney hates 99.9% of them.

#ask meme

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