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fictionalmenownmyheart · 2 years

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If your requests are still open can you write one with Miles Teller where the reader is in the military (you can decide which branch) and she helps him get ready for his role as Bradley “ROOSTER” Bradshaw and also helps on set. Then while filming that’s when the reader finds out she’s pregnant and enlists in the casts help in telling Miles.

Baby Teller • miles teller

I hope I’ve done you’re amazing request justice. After the mention of incorporating the idea of protective Miles from @nickie-amore that isn’t on the request I just had to give it a go and include it, it is short and brief though so I hope that is still okay! At first it scared me that I wouldn’t be able to write for this request but I really enjoyed this. I will disclaimer that I have no US Military knowledge what so ever so I’ve done some research for this in terms of rank and the roles in the different armed forces so I left the detailing very vague. I can’t speak for all the great service women out there so I’m sorry if my portrayal is incorrect. I apologise if it doesn’t replicate your vision for your request in the way I have executed it. Also I should say that there are some time skips of when everything takes place so I’ll separate them and hope that it’s clear enough.

You can read Part 2 here.

Gif is not mine, belongs to the owner.

Warnings: not a lot of Miles until towards the end, fluff

Miles Teller x fem!reader

Word count: 2.5k

After we had found out the great news that Miles was going to be in the sequel film of Top Gun everything changed. I was so happy for him, I knew this role meant a lot to him and I also knew he wanted to do it for me. As a woman in the US military I was sadly use to the odd derogatory terms that were thrown at me, times have certainly changed enough to allow me to do the role I do, just as good (if not better than) my fellow skilled aircraft specialists but it doesn’t mean they choose to accept me. Because of the countless times I have wondered if I was good enough and if I actually should have my rank in the Air Force working as an Airforce Mechanic specialising in maintaining and repairing the planes having to prove myself wasn’t always easy and no one knows that better than Miles. He’s been my biggest supporter and helped me make the choice to enlist in the first place all those years ago before we had even started dating and were just friends.

The whole reason why he auditioned for the role of Rooster, as far as I was aware and could only speak for myself, is because he wanted to understand my life, the life my dad and grandfather led before me and the whole reason why I joined the US Air Force. Before I became a Teller, I was a(n) (Y/L/N) and it certainly showed in the path I chose to take.

Even though I’m not a part of the Navy, I know a hell of a lot about planes and the mechanics behind them. What I didn’t expect was for him to want me to be there every step of the way of filming, him wanting to do it all justice and as realistic as possible was his reasoning for having me behind the scenes and no one disagreed with that. There was even mention of including my name in the closing credits (how crazy is that?!). So that’s what I did, whenever he or any of the other cast or crew asked any questions I answered them as best as I could with my knowledge that 9 times out of 10 came in handy.

I loved getting to know everyone, they became another family like how I was with my brothers and sisters in my regiment were and what was even more lovely was that they all included me in it as well.

As filming got underway all of Miles’ focus went on his performance of getting into his role and I was giving as much advice as I could as well as enjoying seeing my husband at work in his element being so tirelessly busy so it came as a shock to me after I found out that what I thought was a little stomach bug going around set was something much more permanent, well at least for the next 9 months or so. I can’t deny it must have been the moustache, it should be a crime to look that good with one.

“Hey that’s the fourth time in an hour you’ve been going to the bathroom. Are you okay (Y/N)?” Monica ever the observer asks me after I come back from the toilets for the fourth time in an hour like she so correctly pointed out. Me and Monica had formed such a great bond, don’t get me wrong we all had, but maybe it’s because I see myself in the role that she’s playing as Phoenix so much, being one of the women in essentially a “man’s world”, she was doing it justice and letting us have the recognition we deserved. It’s hard and draining at times but the job as a whole is also so rewarding and I couldn’t see myself giving it up. I wouldn’t change it for the world, the good and bad times because that’s shaped me for who I am now and there’s no time dwelling on past situations when the future is right ahead of us.

I look into her brown eyes before checking that the surrounding area is clear, when I’m happy that no one is in close range to hear us I reply. “I found out yesterday morning that I’m pregnant, roughly six weeks along so still early days.”

I watch as her eyes widen and I cover her mouth with my hand before she can utter a word but I hear a slight catch in her throat sound out slightly. “You’re the only person I’ve told. Miles doesn’t know yet, to be honest I don’t know how to tell him. Even though we’ve been together for a long time we’ve only been married over a year and I know there are some future projects he wants to be involved with. I know he’s going to be happy, so happy, but I understand he’s focused on filming right now and it means so much to him I don’t want the news to mess with his head frame for filming so please don’t tell him, I’m not ready ye-“ I’m caught off guard as Monica reciprocates my actions from seconds before seizing my rambling with the palm of her hand and making me drop mine in shock.

Her eyebrows furrow as I see her process my words over in her mind. “When are you going to tell him then?”

She looks at me anticipating my reply, I stare back the silence growing awkward, I look down at the palm still covering my mouth. “Oh yeah, sorry about that.” She chuckles and I roll my eyes good heartedly before joining in with her laughter.

“Well I was thinking of probably telling him on the last day of filming, I was hoping you and the boys would help me.” I try and pull my best puppy dog eyes which seems to work quite well on her. I knew they would, they always catch Miles out and haven’t failed me yet.

“Say no more, I’m sure they’ll be thrilled to help.”

Ever since then me and Monica and the boys have been catching up and spending as much time revising the plan as possible to tell Miles during their time when they’re not needed onscreen. Miles has been none the wiser which has helped the plan commence even better than I could have asked for.

As the days have drawn closer to the impending anticipated end date of filming and my bump continuing to grow and being kept hidden by lots of loose fitting attire I also grew more nervous as every day passed. Even though Miles, as far as I was aware, had no clue about the plan I couldn’t say the same about my newfound distance I was putting between the two of us unintentionally of course. Because the bump was more prominent now I was more inclined to shy away from his touch which was the hardest thing to do when all I wanted was to cuddle up close and share the good news but it had to be done for the sake of the unveiling that wouldn’t be long now.

“Y/N have you seen my Hawaiian shirt? I can’t find it anywhere.”

“Which one? There’s many of them.”

“The cream and kinda green one, I wore it during the bar scene. I need it for filming because we’re reshooting it tomorrow.”

He doesn’t but we’ve had everyone pretend that they’re going to be reshooting a scene when in actual fact it’s going to be the grand reveal and filming was completely finished which he didn’t know just yet.

I’m no seamstress by any means so one of the lovely costume designers actually used a template and replicated his Hawaiian shirt using the actual one he wears walking into the bar (the one he is currently looking for) but making it a smaller scale and it honestly turned out so cute. I couldn’t wait to see his reaction, and I didn’t have to wait too long now.

The time was finally here, after I sent him off in search of a shirt I knew he wouldn’t be able to find I went the meet with the cast. I find them in the bar, cameras placed hidden in plain sight but only if you knew where to look. I wanted to capture this moment forever and Tom managed to pull some stings for it to happen. Not only was my name going to be in the credits but this video was going to play at the very end too, my nerves were increased to the max because I knew this could only be done in one take and there was no places for screw ups.

I’d asked Glen to send a message to Miles to ask him to join us for “filming” so he should be here any second.

“Hey everyone.” He says when he walks through the door, his face set in confusion as he does a double take at seeing all of the cast sat at the tables and bar stools around one side of the bar.

I clear my throat before standing up so he can see me more easily. His face lights up as he begins to head in my direction and I meet him half way, feeling everyone’s eyes on us as I prepare to tell him the news. I leave my hands behind my back so he can’t see the neatly wrapped package I have clenched in my fists.

“What’s going on sweetheart. Is everything okay (Y/N)?” The worry is easy to hear in his voice and he reaches his left hand up and holds my cheek, I lean into his touch hoping it’ll help me find some strength.

I breath in deeply and let out a loud sigh that comes out sounding shaky. “I’ve asked you and everyone here because there’s something I need to tell you. First I would like to say thank you to everyone for helping me make this happen, now that it’s suddenly here and we’ve come to an end of an incredible movie that I know people of all ages are going to love. Friends have been made for life and

He opens the present, pulling out the Hawaiian shirt and revealing the small rooster soft toy that has a tag around one of its foot that reads ‘Baby Teller’. I notice the moment he figures it out, my throat catching and unshed tears begin brewing in my eyes.

“Really?” The biggest smile stretches over his face.

I nod, calming my nerves down. “Yes, really.”

“So there wasn’t going to be any filming today?”

“No baby, we just said that to get you here.”

He begins to laugh, nearly manically, sounding relieved.

He must see the confusion on my face because he explains. “I was worried you were going to ask for a divorce. I thought I’d made a terrible mistake of asking you to help, that I was asking too much of you and not seeing you on and off set enough. You had me really worried sweetheart, please don’t do that again okay? I don’t think I could take it.” He says, pulling me in close. The feel of his warm, strong arms encasing me makes me feel protected and fortunate of having such an understanding and loving man in my life. I know our baby is going to be the luckiest little bean in the world.

“Never again baby I promise, I’m sorry for worrying you but I’m so happy the plan worked out perfectly.”

“Yeah, me too.” He pulls away and cups my cheeks in his hands, stroking my skin softly and staring deeply into my eyes locking me in place and unable to look away even though that’s the last thing I could want to do. He leans down and connects our lips in a soft caress that progressively gets more heated and I hear clapping and cheering surrounding us but doesn’t deter us at all.

Glen and Lewis begin singing the chorus to Great Balls of Fire, roping everybody else in, gradually getting louder. We break apart laughing and turn to everyone with their arms in the air. This wasn’t part of the plan but I’m glad it’s been included. I couldn’t wait to replay the video and watch this whole moment back and for everyone else to see it too.

After filming finished, the interviews and premiere’s began. I went to as many as I could during the early stages of pregnancy and even when my bump became more pronounced in the dresses I wore I tried to go to as many as I could before I had to stay home and not travel as my due date neared in the coming weeks.

Miles has been amazing all the way throughout and has gone to every appointment he could when he wasn’t stuck in doing interviews. I knew those times were hard for him but I made sure to relay everything that was said to me straight after.

I didn’t prepare myself for how protective Miles would become. After getting to the end of every month hinting at the arrival of the baby it became clear he didn’t want to leave my side.

At first I found it sweet and endearing but after so many months of this mother hen clucking around me it did become irritating rather quickly. I tried to say nothing in moments when the protectiveness hit its maximum limit because I know it’s just nerves and excitement all wrapped into one for our first child.

All of the premieres I did manage to go to when the camera men and interviewers were near they always asked to see baby bump and every time our photos were taken Miles was right by my side a hand on my back and the other protecting my bump rubbing it softly.

There was one photo that was my favourite of them all. We were having our photo taken, in that exact position and the baby kicked at the perfect moment, the image capturing him looking down at the bump with a toothy grin and me staring lovingly at him. A definite highlight of mine

“So what have you named him?”

We look at each other before turning our attention back to the phone screen, lots of faces staring back at us on FaceTime. “We’ve decided to call him Bradley.”

The answering chatter and cheer becomes a big jumble of noise that I can’t tell who’s saying what.

“That’s so sweet.”

“Such a good choice.”

“Oh I love it!”

“Bradley Teller? Has a good ring to it.”

“Glen is a much better choice but Bradley will do. It’s second best at most.”

We all laugh at Glen’s comment, he would ask me constantly if Glen was in the running of baby names after I chose to find out the baby’s sex.

We all stay silent after Bradley makes a noise of discontent after disturbing his peaceful sleep and hold our breathes until he lets out a little sigh before settling back down again against Miles’ bare chest beside me. Everyone coo’s upon hearing the soft sound out of his little mouth.

For me baby Teller was always going to be called one name and one name only.

Bradley Alexander Teller.

———————————————

A/N: I wasn’t going to include a middle name at first but then I thought Miles’ middle name would be perfect. I hope you all enjoyed it. Please let me know. Z❤️

#miles teller #miles teller x reader #bradley rooster bradshaw #top gun maverick #tom cruise #miles teller x wife!reader #miles teller x pregnant!reader #monica barbaro #glen powell #lewis pullman #masterlist

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ddejavvu · 8 months

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I’m a Star Wars virgin lol how would u recommend I watch the films? cause omfg that mf anakin is sexy but I don’t know where to start I wanted to watch it a few weeks ago in release date form but idk

Okay if you’re watching strictly movies (called episodes):

4 (a new hope) -> 5 (empire strikes back) -> 6 (return of the Jedi) -> 1 (phantom menace), -> 2 (attack of the clones) -> 3 (revenge of the sith) -> 7 (the force awakens) -> 8 (the last jedi) -> 9 (the rise of skywalker).

Those movies are the trilogies. The original trilogy (episodes 4,5,6), the prequel trilogy (episodes 1,2,3), and the sequel trilogy (episodes 7,8,9). I highly recommend at least the originals and the prequels. The sequel series gets a lot of complaints because of some questionable writing choices, but I still do enjoy them and the actors’ performances. Those trilogies are the core of the Star Wars fandom. They are the must-sees if you want to know what people are talking about.

If you’re focused on anakin specifically, he’s the center of the prequel trilogy and also appears in a show that I’ll talk about later. Do not skip straight to his movies, watch the original trilogy first, but you don’t have too many movies to get through before you meet him.

Other movies:

Solo is a movie about Han Solo’s younger years and it takes place before episode 4, but I recommend you watch it after you watch all three trilogies in that order, as it was released after Han’s main presence in the franchise (episodes 4, 5, and 6).

Rogue one is a move that takes place directly before episode 4, and I also recommend watching that after you finish the trilogies. One of the main characters in rogue one is Cassian Andor, and he has his own spin-off series, Andor (1 season), which takes place before rogue one.

Series:

If you do want to delve into series, there are a lot 😅 I’m only going to go over the ‘main/relevant’ ones (if your favorite isn’t on this list I’m not insulting it. I’m just trying not to overload newcomers with a thousand series that don’t matter to casual fans, and will most likely focus on the newer series. This isn’t meant to start an argument.) but let it be known that I like all of the series, I just think that they aren’t always essential to a basic knowledge of the franchise. This post isn’t written as a Bible, I’m not trying to put down every series or spin-off ever made, it’s a quick and easy guide.

All of these should be watched AFTER completing the trilogies.

Star Wars: The Clone Wars is a 7-season show that takes place between episodes 2 and 3 (the last 2 of the prequel trilogy). It is consistently regarded as a fan-favorite and it gives fantastic insight into the huge gap between those movies, and helps flesh out a lot of amazing characters (pssst… you like anakin already? he’s an MC ;) ). Seriously the show is like people’s favorite Star Wars Thing ever, so if you do end up moving on from the movies and you want to watch more content, I strongly recommend it.

Obi-Wan Kenobi is a one season series centered around Obi-Wan, a character that appears in the prequel trilogy and the original trilogy. Honestly I like the plot but I really fucking love it bc he’s one of my favorite characters and also anakin is in it so if you finish the trilogies and want more of him, I think you’d like Obi-Wan. It takes place between the prequel trilogy and the original trilogy, but closer to the end of episode 3.

The Mandalorian is a three season series that takes place after the original trilogy. Din Djarin (the mandalorian himself) appears in a few episodes of The Book of Boba Fett. This show gained enormous popularity because of both Pedro pascal’s role as the MC and how much of a phenomenon ‘baby yoda’ (grogu) became, so i would honestly recommend it so that you know what people are talking about if they mention it.

those are the series I most recommend.

The Book of Boba Fett is a one season series that centers around the bounty hunter Boba Fett, who’s main presence in the franchise is in episodes 5 and 6. However, he also appears in episode 2. A lot of people really like Boba Fett as well as Din’s appearances, so I am including this series on the list. However, I don’t really think you need to watch it unless you really like him or Din lmfao.

Ahsoka is one season, currently being released over a few weeks on Disney+, and centers around Ahsoka (Anakin’s former padawan, developed in the clone wars series I mentioned before, also in the mandalorian for a short time). I am behind and I haven’t watched the two episodes that have come out yet, so I don’t know if they’re good, but that series is what’s currently coming out, so I figured I’d mention it.

Once more if you’re a seasoned fan and I didn’t include your favorite media please don’t come at me, I know I left stuff out. Hardcore Star Wars fans are fucking cutthroat and I’m not citing these as the only series ever or the only series that matter, I’m just trying to help confused people navigate the overwhelming amount of content the franchise has to offer.

I hope this helps, even if you just want to watch the movies. I also hope I didn’t overwhelm you, I really did try to narrow stuff down!

#mei's mail

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astromechs · 9 months

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9 for rebelcaptain from the Taylor lyrics? 👀

remember the han ships rebelcaptain and is also massively behind the 8 ball on it fic from like two weeks ago? here's a sequel. (prompt is six months gone and i’m still reaching, and i interpreted it oh so loosely ghdjks) now also on ao3! taylor swift lyric prompts ; still accepting!

Five months, twenty-eight days, and six hours have passed since he's last had contact with Echo Base.

There have long been operational reasons for Cassian to be in the practice of keeping track of these things: for the anticipation of any potential extraction timeline, for the eventual debrief and report to follow, for the purpose of planning future missions. He’s risen through the ranks in a short period of time, especially compared to the average, for being nothing if not exceedingly thorough — because that’s what the rebellion needs. His attention, his effort, as much as he can give.

It’s only in the past year and a half that any of the reasons have turned personal, that, well, if he’s being honest with himself — many of them have.

When time had meant nothing to him once, other than the operational logging, it seems like his solo assignments tend to drag on for eternity now. He’s given this one no less attention, no less effort than he’s given any other, but in quiet moments between when that’d been needed and in the seconds just before he’d drifted off for a requisite few hours of sleep just to be able to keep going, he’d felt the absence, acutely, of a soft hand in his, of a warm presence by his side. He’d missed the way her nose always scrunches just before describing something particularly annoying, and the way that he’s always rewarded with the most beautiful smile when he throws in the right kind of dry agreement, so fucking much that it had ached.

But, finally, after five months, twenty-eight days, and six hours, he’s securely on a ship, cleared atmosphere, and is enough within hyperspace, away from Imperial territory, to risk a transmission.

Echo Base, though, isn’t his first one — at least, not base command. He’ll report in, of course, when he has a better sense of his ETA, so they’ll have a precise window to lower the shields without incurring unnecessary risk.

His first transmission is in code, for an additional layer of security, to the channel that can only be accessed by Sergeant Jyn Erso. Just one word, which she’ll be able to understand, if she’s reading (because they’d worked out that code, together, not long after Scarif): alive.

Intellectually, he knows there will be a lag (there always is when communicating from hyperspace, among other perfectly logical reasons), so not getting an immediate response shouldn’t, in and of itself, be a cause for concern. Still, in the idle moments — when he’s had so many in the past five months, twenty-eight days, and six hours, so he’s primed to dwell in them — the thoughts begin to circle, heavy in his mind and even heavier when they settle in his chest. They hold possibilities, worst case scenarios. Fears.

For a long time, he’d pushed down fear to the point of nearly forgetting it ever existed. Here now, though, in the waiting, the memory of it is sharp, painful like a blade to the gut.

The line buzzes; the waiting doesn’t have a chance to linger for long.

Two words, in code, bring him all the relief that maybe he still doesn’t deserve to actually have, but that he accepts, allows to wash over him all the same: welcome home.

It’s been five months, twenty-eight days, and seven hours, and he finds that the hours that remain are their own form of excruciating.

Jyn’s there at the exact moment he steps off of the ship and out into the hangar. Of course she is; he hadn’t doubted that for a second. He hadn’t doubted, either, that she wouldn’t wait whatever seconds it would take for him to actually approach her, that she’d take matters into her own hands and run toward him, cutting the time in half.

And he hadn’t doubted that he’d be practically knocked over by the force of their collision, hadn’t doubted that she’d take his breath away with their first kiss in almost six fucking long months.

No, it’s easy, natural, right, the way they fall into each other like no time has passed at all, the way they exist, for this one moment, away from the chill of Hoth and the even colder complexity of their reality. Where he can hold her and she can hold him, and nothing but the fact that they’re together and they love each other.

Except —

Out of the corner of one eye, Cassian is fairly certain that he sees someone moving — when up to this point, as far as he knows, people have done this reunion a courtesy of giving it a wide berth. He pulls back from Jyn, not far, but enough to study the movement, to pinpoint the identity of the person doing the moving with a pretty high degree of certainty; the man in question isn’t exactly subtle, even on his best day.

A crease forms between his brows. He asks, "What's Solo doing here?"

The effect on Jyn is instant. All traces of her smile, her relief, her anything else are all gone; in their place, her jaw sets and her eyes harden in the way that Cassian knows means danger for someone. Her hands fall away from him, curling into fists, and her whole body tenses like she’s gearing up for a fight.

"Leaving," she growls. "That's what he's doing."

She turns away from him, then, in a blink, stalking toward Solo’s direction with single-minded purpose across the hangar. The man is clearly only aware of what’s happening too late, because he doesn’t manage to get away before she’s shoving him, before she’s yelling out a lot of things — most of which Cassian can’t hear, because of the whir of machinery that sounds behind him then, but a very clear “Get fucked!” does manage to reach his ears.

There’ll be a debrief to attend, and a report to file, because the intelligence he’s gathered is valuable. But for now, he’s content to watch this play out in front of him, and allow the ghost of a smile to tug on the corners of his mouth.

#rebelcaptain #cassian andor #jyn erso #* fic #* prompt fic #asks #andorerso #finally circling back to these again a literal million years later LMAO

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ceejaykayess · 8 months

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The long awaited sequel! Super-cute Cyber-girl AI-Ball Ene, at your service! I kid, I kid, I know no one saw the last post, because it didn’t get posted under the tag for some reason… ah well, second try’s the charm.

After hearing that next year’s Dazecon would be our last, it sorta kicked my ass into gear to get some more of these Kagepro ideas off my chest and onto paper. So, Ene, our deuteragonist to our beloved protagonist (derogatory).

I had a lot of thoughts ever since the first picture on how I wanted to draw Ene’s cyber form. Given Aiba and Tama’s designs, we have something of a base to work off of, but we need at least one more game for me to confidently declare what is and isn’t a pattern. What we can easily tell, at least, is that AI-Balls have white hair and and dress in mostly black and white. And while Ene does do the latter, she… doesn’t do the former. Why? Well… maybe you can figure it out?

But in terms of her design, while I mostly stick to her regular design, the things I want to point out (because it might not be super obvious with my image quality) are the glowing strands in her hair, a blue one in her fringe, a red one in her left pigtail, and a white one in her left. I suppose you could call them remnants of what should have been… I also want to point out her outfit- it’s skin-tight from the neck to the waist, the skirt being a part of the bodysuit. The sleeves are, almost ironically, like Miku’s in that they’re detachable. And the most AI-Ball feature to her are the tech veins that compose her legs, as opposed to generally lacking them as in most Kagepro material.

I made Ene’s gel form a rabbit, in consideration of those mini-sketch comics I read yonks ago that drew Ene’s pigtails as being like hands for her since hers are in her sleeves always. Also, I thought it’d be funny if the first time Shintarou saw it, he’d consider renaming her to Tono in honour of his rabbit.

In case it’s hard to read, the shocked Ene in the top right is saying, “Master! MASTER! Oh no, he can’t hear me, he’s wearing his Raycon:tm: Earbuds, supremely comfortable for all your needs-” The little sketch in the bottom right, of Shintaro face down in bed and Ene in rabbit mode on his bedside table, reads, “Get the fuck up Master, we’re goin’ to the amusement park today!” “Ene, I’m dying…”

Here's a link to the first picture of Shintaro that never posted properly. And here's a link to the follow-up Yaki picture.

How long had she been wandering? She wasn’t really sure. Sure, if she looked at a calendar, or even just the UI on near anyone’s digital device, she’d see that it had been a year, more even. But that wasn’t really what she meant.

When she first opened her eyes, she had a purpose. She wasn’t wandering- she was seeking. She wasn’t on a Journey, she was on a Quest. She had to find them, had to know what happened to them, because if she were here, like this, then the others, then he had to be-

But though she had a Quest, she had to figure it out, her newfound capabilities, how to parse the sheer amount of information that tried to force its way around her, through her, tried to twist the information that made up herself-

And by the time she had come to a balance with her newfound self, body made of numbers and pixels instead of blood vessels and organ systems, what she had been seeking had become old news, hearsay that was washed under the waves of time and new information and new tragedies and new things for people to talk about. The longer it took, the deeper the information was buried, and the deeper it was buried, the longer it would take for her to come and go.

But eventually, after months and months, 8 months and 17 days and 9 hours and 21 minutes and 2 seconds, 3 seconds, 4 seconds, she had bounced from Wiki article to Wiki article, dug through news archives, dragged herself through Towitter discussions and arguments dated around that August 15th, and a bit after, she had learned and pieced together thus: Three people were marked as dead. 14 people were injured, 9 of which being detained as members of the syndicate that caused the explosion. There was no mention of who died, or even of the state their bodies were in. There was no specific mention of their fourth, her annoying kouhai who was so bitter, who brought everyone down despite his brilliance, who everyone loved despite his acidic tongue and obvious disdain, who she hated because of how much it felt like she were looking at a mirror, her kouhai who was lying on the ground in a pool of his own blood, surrounded by rubble and mumbling things she could barely understand being in such a terrible state herself-

She felt herself lose it, the desperate, fickle hope she held in her oversized jumper, because what does it matter? For all intents and purposes, she was dead. As far as she was aware, as far as anyone was aware, her best friend was, too. Maybe even her kouhai. And her-

And-

That kind boy, the one that irritated her so, the one that she wanted to see every day, the one that made her feel this terrible, terrible way, he too is-

Gone. They’re all gone. So what’s the point? Her Quest was over. And she couldn’t even delete herself, backspace over the 1′s and 0′s that composed her new existence. She was too much of a coward to throw herself at a virus and let it have its way with her. She could just stay here until eventually this webpage rotted away, but the longer she stayed in proximity to this information, to this reminder, the more she felt like she needed to expel the non-existent contents of her non-existent stomach. So she ran. She left. She tried to separate herself from her name, from the life that could no longer be hers, that simply was no longer.

She wandered.

How long had she been wandering?

…

Long enough that she felt nostalgic, at least. Long enough that she’s actually contemplating her current course of action, long enough that she’s following through on that course even as she contemplates the wisdom.

Her current location, digitally, was in the mainframe of the Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department. Her destination was downstairs, 5 floors underground in fact. The Advanced Brain Investigation Squad. Her… former squad, to put it a way. She followed along the flow of data from the routers to the elevator, holding and holding and holding on to the connection as she sunk deeper and deeper and deeper until she felt like she might actually suffocate despite not needing air, before feeling the next router and leaping for it, bringing her all the way down to the abyss.

Taking in deep gasping breaths of nothing that still let her feel like a human, she looked around. The ABIS mainframe wasn’t anything special. Tunnelled far as hell away from anything else, sure, but nothing special. So much for the stupid old man and his so-called “professional coding skills”. Feh. She’s seen message boards with more interesting encryption.

Despite her trash-talking, she still looked around curious as she wandered deeper. Jumping from computer to computer, camera to camera, she saw how much the place had changed in the last year. Or rather, how little it didn’t. It was like she had never left. Eventually she came across a concrete room with a familiar sense of decoration that made her want to spit and laugh and scream and cry-

Which was immediately blown away when she looked down on the room’s occupants. There was, of course, the room’s owner and decorator, with his scruffy brown hair pulled into a messy ponytail, holding his iconic lab coat rather than wearing it, glasses askew and face looking as if he hadn’t slept or washed his face for days. His cybernetic eye, pupil the same as his remaining brown one, stared deep into the eyes of the person that had her stopping short, looking again, re-evaluating and readjusting, checking the feed and the system and refreshing everything, video and audio, again and again, just to make sure she wasn’t being deceived, that the person she was seeing was really who she thought he was.

“-is that understood, Shintaro?” “…I understand, old man.”

His voice was somehow more unbearable than usual, his face lacking its usual stern and uncaring look. It was loose, and flabby. Like he didn’t even care enough to pretend to not care. Instead of the red coat her best friend was so fond of, or even the black suit he was partial to, he stood in just a white shirt, arms bare. He was missing an eye, a scar covering the eyelid, one that made her think of a boy reluctantly in red, facedown in a puddle of the colour.

“Oi, I told you already, call me Boss, y’got it brat!?” “Mm.”

Barely acknowledging him, he turned away, making his way out of Boss’ Office, as the namesake would have you call it. Without thinking, she began to follow after him, but was stopped when she heard the old goat mutter something.

“Give me strength, Ayaka…”

Whispering the pained prayer, the man she always thought of as an unreliable lout that only ever got moving when he was being put under threat stood, donning his lab coat and fixing his glasses. Reaching into it, he withdrew a small sphere, chockful of electronic components- very similar to the one in his own eye, actually… or rather, based on it. He gave it a long look, and so did she. What was he planning…? Her musing was broken by his clenching of his fist and replacing the orb, muttering tomorrow as he moved out of the room- down the hallway and towards his lab. The opposite direction of Shintaro.

Shintaro.

Almost without thinking, she turned around, searching for the apathetic genius, that damn ikemen that couldn’t take a hint for the life of him. The hallway was lonely, and he was never very fast, so she caught him easily halfway towards the elevator. She hesitated. She had already seen more than she expected, more than she even wanted. She had expected the old man. Hell, maybe some part of her even expected to see reference to the others, pictures maybe. She hadn’t even gotten to look at their old workplaces, at her old work bench where she fiddled with her Evolver- she didn’t even know if her Evolver was still around.

But she hadn’t expected a man, no, a brat she thought was dead to be walking around with the living. She shouldn’t follow him. She wanted to check on her Evolver, see if Mr. Tateyama had improved on anything in the last year, see if the three of them are still remembered. She doesn’t even like Shintaro that much anyways, if he knew she was spying on him he’d just scold and scream at her like the ungrateful punk he is-

But even so, she follows him anyways. Jumps to the data in his phone, barren and new, clenched in his hand. She’s only doing this because the other two would have wanted her to. Not because she wants to.

And so, she watches as he rides the elevator, not once glancing at his phone. She watches as he hails a cab and asks for an address that, after a quick search, she finds is set in Tokyo, not Chiba. She watches as he sits silently through the whole ride, rudely ignoring his chauffeur’s attempts at conversation and instead looks with almost a sad look at the cityscape passing him by. She watches as he pays the driver, walks up to the rundown looking building, sighs, and opens the door. She watches as he nods at the tired 30-something reclining against a couch in the foyer, walking up the stairs until he comes up to a door. And she watches as he silently pulls out a key, opens the door, and skulks to his room. She can’t see anything else out of the narrow view the phone’s camera offers her, but it looks like he’s trying to be quiet. Could there… be someone else here?

And eventually, he enters a dark room. He makes for the bed in the corner, planting himself on the mattress, and looks down. In his hands, his phone, and thus she, face towards him. He looks into the screen, and for a moment she felt panic. Did he see her? What was she going to say? How does she explain it- anything? Would he even care? As she opened her mouth, prepared to speak through the microphone-

He slumped his shoulders, sighed, and closed his eyes. “Damn it,” he mumbled. He rubs his eyes, and places the phone down. Whatever he does next is a mystery, as the phone she’s in is can only see up and down, and half of that is unavailable to her on a flat surface. She feels out, and finds a computer to connect to. She shuffles over, and finds herself in a much roomier space. Taking care not to activate the screen, she peeks through the camera to see… him, lying on his back, staring at the ceiling. She stared at him for what must have been a reasonable time before turning away- she wasn’t going to get anything out of him, not like this, and not without announcing herself, which- she still hasn’t thought on whether she actually wanted to, let alone how. So, instead of being productive and thinking on it, she turns back to the files on his computer and, invasion of privacy be damned, went scrounging.

His internet history, nothing but 2channel, various forums she also used to browse, anime piracy websites, and the occasional risque website search. She held back on this occasion, she didn’t need to know. Yet. Around certain dates, he would even search up strange things like gift ideas or idol showing tickets. Weirdo.

Outside of his history, there’s his documents. A lot of deleted drafts, the occasional downloaded risque image (legs, huh? Is that why she had always…?), and a lot of editing software. A lot of editing software. What was all this…? She found unfinished music projects, which she wouldn’t dare listen to while he’s still here. Poems that trailed off, half-thought out lyrics written here and there. The occasional poorly drawn picture, and… photos. Lots and lots of photos. Some in a file labelled “Never forget.” Others labelled in a file called “Never forgive.” The former was full of pictures of… them. Shintaro, and her, and… and Ayano, and Haruka, their faces ones she hadn’t even realised she had begun to forget until this moment. Them in high school, their first meeting at the school festival, group projects and study groups, sleepovers and festival gatherings- their first day at ABIS, too. And, not just that. Pictures of Haruka drawing, of herself fiddling with the Evolver or a game she was practicing, Ayano hard at work on a test or humming while folding paper cranes- none of these were taken by Shintaro, she was certain, but he collected them all anyways. There were even more besides.

Some of a bright little girl with searing orange hair, the barest similarities to Shintaro in her face and the strongest in her eyes (he had mentioned a little sister, didn’t he?), others of that bright girl next to him and a woman that looked older than both but even more similar, even older ones of a young boy and girl that could only be those two standing hand in hand with that same woman and an older man. Pictures of a cute white rabbit (Tounou, wasn’t that her name?), of the old man, and of old and familiar places. Their school, that bridge, even the one game convention they all attended.

She… didn't know how she felt about it. Leaving that, she opened up the other file, and found… pictures of that place. As it was before the explosion, and as it was after. Documents detailing changes, listing occupants and suspects and those connected to the members they captured, pictures of them with friends and family, all connected together by a metaphorical red string in the document that centres around one simple question: Where are they?

She… really didn't know how she felt about it. He hadn't let go or moved on, he hadn't been wallowing- he was on just as much of a Quest as she had been. As she still could be. Closing the file, she looks through the camera at her kouhai's slumped form, thoughts running through her mind…

…

He left the building bright and early the next day, once again holding tightly onto the new phone. And once again, the two of them found themselves returning to their old workplace. She wasn't certain of what he was here for, but she could guess. As he made his way out of the elevator and towards the old man's so-called lab, the Psync Room, she felt even more certain of her prediction.

And eventually, standing in front of the jacketless boy, was the old goat she had once called teacher, looking just as rumpled as yesterday but at least clad in his lab coat. And in his hand, as expected, was the small orb filled to the brim with cybernetics. He began to explain what exactly was in his hand, an AI-Ball he called it (the shitty punster he is), and started rattling off features like different vision wavelengths, internet access, and most notably, an AI companion to keep him company.

This piqued her attention the most. Someone to stand by his side and help him out, to protect him as he tries to protect others. A partner… and one that can't die, by virtue of their existence being backed up on the so-called Wadjet System. To her, it sounded like…

An opportunity.

As the old man rambled on, she tried to feel out the AI-Ball. For such a supposedly high-tech piece of equipment, it felt rather… undefended, from threats such as her. Then again, she doubts anyone could've expected a sapient AI to be floating about. Or maybe they'll add some better antivirus later… hopefully. Pushing through some gaps in the firewall, she found herself in the core of the device. Looking this way and that, she tried to familiarize herself with her new housing. Looked like audio was here, here was video, here was… AR projection? And… a neural link, a gel formation, a shock response, and- a self-destruct??

Before she could really parse through all that (seriously, why so many abilities??), she found herself stumbling on… well, what she should have expected, really. An AI, young and unassuming. And asleep. It lacked an appearance in this digital world, merely a bundle of code vaguely shaped like a person. If she was going to do what she had to do, then she had to… get rid of it. There was no way she could hold control while the AI this body was made for was running around too, but… well, it felt a bit like murder to her. But that was silly, this wasn't a person, just an AI, with no life to speak of, and no memories either (she steadfastly ignored the stupid, stupid old man's remarks that the AI-Ball would grow alongside him to become his perfect partner).

She had to do it. She had to. For Shintaro. For Ayano. For Haruka. And maybe even a little bit for herself, too. She raised her hands and stepped toward the nameless AI, preparing to unravel the lines of code holding it together, preparing to scatter its 1's and 0's into the Cloud, preparing to deprive it of the chance to become its own person- and stopped. She- she couldn't. She just- she was callous but not cruel, the last year hadn't changed that. It had made her energetic in a way she never could consistently be in a body but tired in a way that was deeper than her bones, but it hadn't made her a murderer.

But still she had to- to do something. Maybe, maybe they could share, or-

"Well, go ahead and put her in, Shintaro."

And then suddenly the neural link was being opened and the AI was opening its eyes, slowly generating an appearance just from the barest hints of Shintaro's psyche, body becoming more defined, hair appearing and growing long, down to the waist, and-

She panicked. She reached out with her hand and pulled, binding and zipping the core of the AI down as she hurried, ignoring the voiceless cry as she reached out with her other hand, grabbing the neural link and-

Then she was twisting and writhing, her body being compressed and stretched out, information not native to her forcing its way in, connections to something beyond, a Mother that was not her mother, her form changing, blue becoming white and she could hear him, his thoughts, feel his sorrow, his confusion, his annoyance, his apathy, and she opens her mouth to scream-

And then it all faded away, assimilated with her, and she felt different, but she still felt like herself, and she opened her eyes and looked out through a single eye, taller than she had ever been (silently, an eye coloured #fa3c3e shifted to a hue constantly transitioning from #55edfe to #0e2652), and-

"I can… see. Thanks, old man."

"Oi! I already told you, call me Boss! Hell, I'll even accept you calling me by name, anything's better than old man!"

"Mm. So, what was that about an AI companion?"

"Eh? You can't hear her? Strange, maybe she's a bit shyer than I expected. Let me just-"

The old goat made motions towards the AI-Ball, and she quivered, she had to do something, else he'd see that she isn't meant to be here, but what could she- oh, duh!

"I-it's nothing to worry about! Sorry!"

"Eh?"

Her kouhai looked this way and that, scratching his head. He almost looked scared.

"Did… you hear something, old man?"

"…no? Oh, is that the AI-Ball?"

"Yep yep, that's me!" She tried to centre herself, she needed to land a good introduction so they don't suspect a thing. Briefly, her mind recalled a conversation she and her best friend had about this dense bastard, and decided to follow through in her unspoken plea. "Super cute cybergirl AI companion Ene, at your service, Ma-su-tah~"

Alright, maybe that was a bit much, but sue her! She was panicking, and needed to keep him off kilter!

"E-eh? Ene? Super cute?? Master??? Old man, what the hell kind of AI did you stick in my head!?"

The old goat raised his hands in defence. "Hey, I didn't do anything. The AI-Ball determines its personality based on what's best for you. Is there something you need to tell me, young man…?" He raised a brow mockingly, barely suppressing a gross smirk.

Her… guh, Master blushed red, shaking his head frantically. "N-no! And- and it's barely even been few minutes, how could she know what's best for me!?"

He shrugged. "That's just her opinion. Maybe you'll feel more comfortable with it in a few months."

"A few months!?" Her Master went bug-eyed. Pfft, if only she could see his face… "Hell no, get this thing outta me!"

"Aw, Master, that's so mean… sniff sniff… am I really so deplorable?" To try and strike it home, she used the AR projection feature, placing an image of her newly reformed cyberself before him, now detachable sleeves covering her face as she shakes and shivers. After all, this guy…

"Guh… f-fine."

Was an absolute pushover.

"Alright, that's great to hear brat! Now get out of here, I'm busy. I'll be seeing you here next week for you to resume your apprenticeship, so make sure to send me any emails if any issues pop up with her."

With his piece said, he turns back to the rows of computers, completely ignoring Shintaro. Her Master, still shaking off his flush, turns away and grumbles. As he stalks his way down to the elevator, Ene felt out his being, the rush of thoughts on her, on Kejirou, on the past, on the future, all blended together with his embarrassment, his frustration, his exhaustion- it was all rather dizzying to her. Maybe if she were truly an AI, designed for this sort of relationship, it wouldn't be so hard. Silently, she tried to mute the connection, grunting when she saw that wasn't an option.

As he entered the elevator, he slumped against the back wall, riding it up to the ground floor. He's silent, so she is too, not really sure what to do.

"Hey, Ene."

She jumps. That wasn't ever a thing she expected him to call her.

"Yes, Master?"

He winces, but shakes it off. He stands silent for one beat, two, three, and she almost thinks he's ignoring her before he continues.

"…let's get along."

Ene stared blankly. That was… probably the most polite he had ever treated her. She smacked her face- now wasn't the time. Make a good first impression. Even so, she couldn't help the way her voice softened a bit as she said her first genuine sentence as Ene instead of as the ghost of Takane Enomoto.

"…yeah. Let's get along… Master."

#ai the somnium files #kagerou project #art #ene #aitsf #Her centre stance is based on her pose in the Meka Trio's portion of the anime OP #Her face in the top right is based on a frame from the Summertime Record MV #This story got right the heck away from me it's way too long #I messed up and didn;t realise reblogs didn't count as posts that would appear in the tags in and of themselves #I should have because that explains why I never saw reblogs when I was scrolling through a tag's history rather than my feed but alas #Also I decided Fraying was dumb; this story just works on the Snakes

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tboy-boone · 7 months

Note

1-15 for the wip asks :)

this is like an entire school assignment, sorry it took so long <3

how many WIPS do you have right now?

too many.... i can't finish anything

2. what is your oldest WIP?

I have this goofy sequel I made to this one story i wrote in middle school and I have to finish it. For everything else, I can't finish anything, but for this WIP, I am required to!!

3. what is your newest WIP?

The last WIP i worked on was Cold, and it's my favourite of all of them. My favourite child without a doubt <3

4. Do you have any WIPs that will never be finished?

I never ever finish anything and I love it! Some things are meant to be small and unfinished thoughts, and I will do it again!

5. What scene did you write first in your current WIP?

The first part I wrote in Cold wasn't the beginning. Since the idea came to me in a dream, I wrote it in segments. So, I wrote the beginning like 6 months later.

6. How long do you tend to spend on your WIPs?

It's usually like two days or almost a year. No in between.

7. What's the longest time you've spent on a fic?

When I was writing I Saw Your Ghost Tonight, it took so damn long.... I started it in October '22 when I was working sound at a play and..... then I hated it after trying to work on it for long. So, it took even LONGER. I have a whole hate/love thing with it, more hate than love.

8. What's the fastest time you've finished a fic?

My last fic took me a little under three hours I think. There was something in the air that night.

9. Do you write your fics as you go, or finish before publishing?

I finish my fics before publishing. I didn't always used to do that, but it helps me commit to the fic. Otherwise, all my works will never be finished.

10. Do you outline a fic before you write it?

Sometimes I'll outline a fic, but I don't usually. If it's a little on the longer side, I might outline it. It just depends on what I'm writing about.

11. How close has your WIP stayed to its outline/original version?

I never finish an outline..... but usually it'll stay pretty close.

12. Do you have a title, working or otherwise, for your WIP? How did you come up with it?

My word docs are given a working title, and it's usually the first sentence so I know what it is. I don't typically give it a good title until I publish it.

13. What's been part of your WIP since the beginning? What the newest idea that you've added to it?

Well, in unnamed wip, I have this bitchy to lovers concept that I like, but I'm thinking of changing some parts of it. I need them to be bitchier and the catalyst needs to change, I'm not feeling it anymore.

14. Rewrite a scene from your WIP from another character's perspective.

Ben had fallen asleep on the couch, but when Riley or Abigail nudged him awake, he would say he was just shutting his eyes for a moment. The occasional snore told them otherwise. Sometimes, he’d snore loud enough he heard himself through his sleep. Tonight was no different than any other, Ben woke himself up with a snort. His eyes burned after hours of reading and researching, so he lay there with his eyes closed, listening to Riley and Abigail in the kitchen. Riley’s laptop was still on, he didn’t get up that long ago. The blue glow dried out Riley’s eyes like the dizzying blur of pages dried Ben’s.

“Howdy, stranger,” Riley’s voice crackled.

There were days when they were all so invested in their research that hours went by before they spoke to each other and discussed their findings.

“You should get some rest.” The soft wrinkling of Abigail’s gloves echoed in the silent apartment. “The both of you.”

“Don’t tell it to me,” Riley grumbled. “Tell it to Indiana Jones in there.”

Despite his snarky tone, Riley kept his voice low for Ben. Although, Ben wasn’t sure if Riley spoke quietly for Ben, or because he cranky enough to start talking shit.

15. Rewrite a scene from your WIP in a different person (first, second, third, etc.)

Although, you should think about getting a new couch. You kneaded the cushions with your palm before sitting down, but it never made the seats any softer. You glanced at the clock on the wall, far too late to be awake, but far too early for you to sleep. The ticking bounced off the bare walls and through the barren rooms. There were plenty of things you needed to do, but the very thought exhausted you in an instant. Ringing echoed from the kitchen, another phone you forgot to disconnect. Can't a man sit in his home and listen to the drone of the news in peace? Once you hoisted yourself onto the crutches, you made your way to the phone hanging on the wall.

thanks for the school assignment brother golfball

#asks

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bahbahhh · 1 year

Text

The Killing Moon Author's Note

He asks if he remembers her.

He doesn’t answer.

There is quiet longing between them in moments when they are alone that Link still cannot place. He thinks he needs time but Hyrule won’t grant them peace. Especially not when there is a kingdom to rebuild and the Blood Moon still rises. But Link doesn’t want to rebuild, he just wants-

(Or, Breath of the Wild 1.5 for those who are tired of waiting.)

Rated E - Post BoTW/ TotK theories - 50,834 words - complete

Read The Killing Moon on Ao3

(Two months later, here it is!) Wow. I cannot believe this story is finally done. I started writing this before so much of what defines me and my life today even happened…I look back at 2017 and the things that used to excite me, bother me, worry me have shifted and changed so significantly…and yet LoZ remains

There have been a few games in my lifetime that have touched me this way, becoming sources of comfort during challenging or stressful times, never losing their luster. (“Seriously, you are playing that again, B?” ) The idea for The Killing Moon came following a frantic explosion of creative energy after I finished BotW for the first time. I didn’t want it to be over. I remember diving into fanfiction at the time, hungry for anything and everything that would keep the story alive.

Then I decided to write a multi-chapter, lore-heavy, character-study of a fanfiction. As my first stab at fanfiction. Because, why not.

I churned out several chapters REALLY fast (I think 9??) and then my life got busy, my attention shifted, and before I knew, it had been years.

I would occasionally think about the story, sometimes making a mental note to go back and delete it, only to forget about it again…To be honest, I was nervous to look back at my writing and get stuck….I had had a vague outline of where I was going that was lost, so all I had in my head was a final confrontation under Hyrule Castle (more on this later).

Following a replay of BotW and the 2021 E3…I decided to do a massive edit, removing chaptering 2-9 completely, and reworking the plot to align more cohesively with what we received about the sequel. The story had a clear endpoint and it took off from there.

Major changes/themes/story notes

[MAJOR CHANGE] the tense:

I switched the ENTIRE story from past to present tense (I am positive I've slipped up here and there…I did not have a beta and, alas, I am not an editor…truly, this was written in the sleepy moments I get at the end of the day when my kids are in bed).

The Killing Moon was never meant bring much resolution and I felt present tense lent itself better to the suspense and tension I wanted present throughout with this in mind. Also, from the beginning, this story has been primarily about Link beginning the process of unpacking some of his trauma. I wanted a chance to deepen my version of Link POV and intensify the complexity of emotions he might face after all he has endured…I wanted to honor the complexity living with trauma. At times, it was meant to feel claustrophobic and uncomfortable and confusing. He is actively remembering his past in this story, specifically recalling personal details no one else can give him. Even Zelda is limited in what she can tell him about himself and as Link says, it feels wrong (even though she would gladly do it) to hold her accountable for chronicling his life. So if he wants it, he must endure it.

[THEME] loss of knowledge to time/making decisions on incomplete information:

I also wanted a tense that promoted unreliability…this story is very much a guessing game. For us (the fandom) with the sequel coming, but also the characters themselves…literally working back from the almost-end of the world where many of the information-keepers died and records were destroyed/lost.

BotW is a post-apocalyptic Hyrule. The “golden age” is long gone. Even the “robust” Hyrule we see in the events of 100 years ago do not hold a candle to what is alluded to exist in Hyrule 10,000 years prior. There is little/no mention of KEY elements in LoZ lore because they have been lost to time, purposely concealed, and then forgotten over the ages.

“Goddess, don't tell me you’ve forgotten your sacred charge? “A pause. “The power without equal. The hidden treasure of Sky Keep? Broken by Twilight’s touch? Fa ha ha…The birth of the Calamity has even faded into myth, hasn't it?...Now give me what I ask in return for the secrets of the Triforce.” (Horned statue, Chapter 4)

In the Killing Moon, first time they have ever heard about the Triforce is from a demon.

This Link and Zelda, in a way, resemble the first version of themselves. They have very little guidance. The history they are working through is incomplete and potentially inaccurate (maybe even skewed by those who recorded it) and yet, they must face destiny all the same. As we saw in BotW, destiny doesn’t wait for you to be prepared.

[THEME] the burden of destiny/ trauma across lifetimes:

Jacob Geller provides a beautiful narration to the theme of darkness in the Zelda series as a whole and does a magnificent job of summarizing what sets BotW apart. “It is a game in which each acre, every abandoned stable and crumbled temple and forgotten spring is a monument to your failures.”

I didn’t come upon this video until very recently, but I feel like it captures the essence of the the "big picture stuff" I was aiming for with Link. The first scene I wrote for The Killing Moon was actually his panic attack in chapter 3:

"Nothing - left of me," he continues in a desperate whisper. He can’t read her face. "If we have to - again," His hands are sweeping in front of him, tracing his broken speech in patterns that feel true. “I won't come back. My body but I-”

A new resolve takes hold of him. He doesn’t need her to just hear him -he wants her word. He’s in her face now. She takes him up in her hands again, and furiously thumbs away the tears from his cheeks. He is supposed to be dead. He whimpers and dips his head down, chewing, chewing, chewing on the words.

"Not-not even sure I'm fully alive!"

To die (I know the jury is out on whether he actually dies or not, but in The Killing Moon, he does die 100 years ago), come back without your memories (essentially the stuff that make us who we are), into a world that has seen generations since you closed your eyes, and be thrust back into a destiny you have already failed…and then the WEIGHT of your past lives…thinking about the overstimulation alone breaks my heart. I feel it in my gut.

Now that Link has finally done it, “completed” the task he was charged with 100 years ago, what happens to the weight of duty when the war is won? What happens to a weapon? Does he get put on a mount somewhere, too? Does he turn to dust?

He can’t even figure that out because of the inescapability of his fate. In the first chapter, he is called to destiny a THIRD time in a single lifetime.

He is also trying to make sense of this with another person. Someone he learns he once loved, who still loves him, who he understands has danced with him in these roles over many lifetimes.

Is there any part of this soul that is his alone? (Chapter 7)

How much of this was manufactured? Does that even matter to him now? Can he allow himself to have feelings? In BotW, we learn 100 years ago Link felt so burdened by duty, he stopped speaking (in The Killing Moon, it is a total loss of the already very little verbal speech he had as an individual who is/was selectively mute.) Now, faced with another “calamity” of sorts, it is his feelings toward Zelda, in particular, he struggles with. And she as well -can they allow this when they know what is at stake? There is a push and pull intentionally through the story, the impact of severely ingrained GUILT for wanting more than what they are destined for. Wanting each other more than anything.

“This isn’t the first time I’ve heard stories about your travels, all you’ve done for everyone else since you woke up. It doesn't feel like my Hyrule anymore. It feels like yours.”

“It can be yours, too.” His voice frays at the end. He sets his hands on her thighs. Something burns in his throat.

“It’s OK. I’m at peace with this. Really, I am. I will do everything I can to protect it. To protect them. For you.” (Chapter 10)

Also a feeling that their timing is off. Their specific time together, that they were supposed to have, has past (I think we see it in AOC tbh). They’ve lost that to destiny, too.

[MAJOR CHANGE] Big Bad

"A Spring is created only when a divine spirit departs from Hyrule." A mischievous smile. “What is born from shadow? A Void. The Blood Moon is a harbinger of what’s waiting beyond. See, look here-” (Hino, Chapter 3)

In the original draft of this story, before 2019 E3, Void was the name of the "Big Evil" in this Hyrule. It was going to be revealed as another title for Demise, trapped inside Ganondorf who was sealed under Hyrule Castle. I shit you not, lol. His sealing was going to have been flawed somehow and the malice or essence that escaped is how we get Calamity Ganon. That is why in chapter 7 the movements of CG in the footage are “off”. Basically a dead spirit carcass being possessed by the Big Evil because, fuck, he’s not going to die that easily after 10,000 years and then another 100 more of being this close.

When we got the teasers, Void became a description for the concealed bit of history. I still wanted to play with the themes of parasites/possession and added in the possibility that after his time with Zelda, a silver of the human he was started to come through. You can read my thoughts on the battery theory, which heavily influenced the connection between Ganondorf, Link and Zelda in this story.

“All three or none at all.” (Master Sword, Chapter 7).

Ganondorf too is trapped by his destiny and how TERRIBLE it is to be on THAT side of it. Imagine if your destiny was the soul of not a Hero or a Goddess, but a demon. What if your destiny was to be the one who will Eat the World? And what if you loved Hyrule? What if Ganondorf was a man of the people, who was trying to do right and the Royal Family tried to ERASE him from history by sealing him away and concealing everything from the records?

“We are bound too tightly in this fate. We’ve been fighting for a long time. More than a century. It was us ten thousand years ago. It has been the three of us time and time again. Link, when I was in the darkness, sometimes I felt like he was a part of me. And that part was lonely and scared and so tired. I think he wants us to save him like we saved you. Is that crazy?”

I am admittedly pretty obsessed with the idea Zelda feels connected to Ganondorf.

[STORY NOTES] Zonai

Mentioning the Zonai came in the rewrites. Not even on my radar in 2017 when I started The Killing Moon. Clearly, I am firmly in the-Zonai-play-a-big-role-in-the-past-and-TotK-camp. But I didn’t think it was realistic for Link and Zelda to figure out everything about them in this story.

[STORY NOTES] Luminous Stones

Another addition to the rewrite. I became obsessed with all the raw luminous-stone looking crystals in the teasers and ran with the detail about them rumored to contain souls of dead. It did not make it into the story but I did have tons of notes about how these luminous stones might be souls of Zonai or the army of the spear-wielding rider in the pictographs/ petroglyphs and their energy is part of the seal.

[STORY NOTES]Losing the Master Sword

The threat of this was always in the original story but it was emphasized more in the rewrite.

The original story had Link’s nightmare in which the Sword is gone (it was actually written to be symbolic of LINK “becoming” the Master Sword in the nightmare, that his body is the weapon, to be bent and broken and forged again and again with the Shrine of Resurrection). Hyrule Forest–resting place of the Master Sword–was destroyed in the original story. It fits well with TotK. I do wonder if the Lost Woods will be inaccessible for the game or for a part of the game.

[Fun-ish facts]

I love to connect all the LoZ stories and overiously do so with direct references to past lives (this story is SS, TP, Oot-heavy). But there are more indirect references in The Killing Moon I tried to sneak in:

"Wind waker" - Stamella shroom tonic for soldiers (Wind Waker)

The three comrades from Link's past (Colson, Medin and Jayde) are called "four swords" by their commanding officer. (Four Sword Adventures)

This is dangerous.” Link starts.

“Take this.” Zelda hands him her torch before stepping further into the cave. (Chapter 11)

(A spin on "It's dangerous to go alone, take this!" The Legend of Zelda 1986)

Thank you to those who have stayed with the story. Thank you to those who are new. I do this for fun and I can't tell you how much it means to me every time I get a notification someone took time out of their day to leave kudos or write a comment or I see the story was bookmarked. Comments/questions always welcome. I am planning to go back and do some minor (mostly grammar) edits but I already have some ideas for a continuation once TotK is out.

I just love this fandom.

#bahbahhhwrites #loz botw fanfic #botw fan fic #long fic #author's note #the killing moon #legend of zelda #loz #botw #loz fanfiction #loz fandom #totk theory #totk fanfic #tears of the kingdom

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convenientalias · 2 years

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I Rate Cdramas by Whump: Part 2

Two years ago now I made a post rating every cdrama I'd watched at the time by quality of whump. I feel I've watched enough cdramas since then that it is now time for a sequel.

(Note: If you like kdramas, I made two posts rating those by whump as well, for your reference.)

Some notes before I begin:

Yes this is entirely objective. What do you mean??

If the ratings seem a little high, it might be because whump is one of the things that convinces me to watch a show to begin with.

There will be spoilers, but vague spoilers.

I'm only listing shows I've completed and remember well enough to rate.

THE RATINGS.

Addicted Heroin--8/10. This is a gay school romance between surprise stepsiblings, it's not really meant to be whumpy. Despite this, it has some drunk and angsty scenes, some sick scenes, and even a kidnapping!! I would give it a 10/10 purely for going the distance it Did Not Need to Go (although the source material is even whumpier, but that's another story) but I feel I should be honest and say it is primarily a show of comedy, not over the top whump. The whump is definitely there though.

City of Streamer--I'd probably be more into the whump here if I was more into lady whump, as a lot of bad things happen to female characters, both physically and emotionally. Men go through distress but it's usually not as physical as I'd like. Since I'm very picky about lady whump and this show mostly doesn't hit the spot for me, I'll give it a 3/10.

Granting You a Dreamlike Life--10/10, Luo Fusheng's life sucks. People in this show get beat up, threatened with guns, stabbed, arrested, kidnapped, chased by wolves, trapped by an avalanche, literally shot.... "People" here mostly meaning Luo Fusheng but Tianying and some others get a good share of whump as well. Granting You a Dreamlike Life is living the dream.

Joy of Life--I really wanted to see Fan Xian get whumped but by halfway through the show I had to accept that it was more of a power fantasy type drama about Fan Xian being Clever and Competent. If you ever see me complaining about Joy of Life, know that this is a solid part of my sour grapes. 3/10, credit given to the Teng Zjing arc and the couple times Fan Xian gets captured or arrested.

Rattan--9/10. This show has two endings and I swear they did that specifically to deliver two different brands of whump/angst. But more importantly, they put poor Qin Fang through the fucking wringer! In the first fucking episode he gets drugged, arguably kidnapped, and almost dies in a car crash. Then the rest of the show he suffers from a curse, gets kidnapped, gets hurt so bad he falls into a coma.... They really do not go easy on this poor boy. Honorable mention to Si Teng's tragic backstory and Qin Fang's business partner also getting abducted that one time.

Reset--Ehhh the leads are going through it but they're mostly just getting tired. They do get arrested/interrogated a good deal, and die a whole lot. But I'd call this a suspenseful show, not a whumpy one. 2/10, rare nonwhumpy fave for me.

Sword Dynasty--I must begrudgingly admit they whumped the prince in this show pretty good, and they whumped the MC a lot too, I just hated him. This show is bad but I will admit it is moderately whumpy. A very begrudging 5/10.

Under the Skin--Level of whump maybe a bit higher than average for a crime procedural. Police officers being menaced is pretty standard, especially when one is an ~artistic genius~. Shen Yi sure does drown a lot, though, and the flashback revealing his reaction to Lei Yi Fei's death is really angsty. I'd give it a 6/10 bc my standards for thrillers are higher than my standards, for example, for a school drama like Addicted Heroin.

Weaving a Tale of Love--I said my taste in lady whump was picky and guess what, a cheerful crossdressing female lead getting whumped is in fact my taste. I loved seeing bad things happen to Liuli/Xiao Douzi! I would have been up for seeing her get drugged or imprisoned some more!! 7/10 bc while the whump is good when it's there, the majority of the show is cheerful, shippy, or plotty, and not really all that whumpy.

Winter Begonia--Whump is not what I go to Winter Begonia for. I go to it for the slice of life vibes, the slashiness, and the Chinese opera. But, as whump goes, it's actually quite strong. There are opera performers losing their voice, losing their ability to walk, losing their reputations, some even losing their lives. And then there's Cheng Fengtai, friendly and kind of shady businessman who has his own shit going on--most notably he goes into a coma at one point and also is once kidnapped by bandits. Honestly 8/10, I don't think of it as whumpy when looking back on it but objectively there is a lot.

Word of Honor--People are slowly dying with nails in their chest. People are mourning their lost loved ones and falling apart. And sometimes getting beaten up or captured in the present as well. 9/10, I could go higher but I always get a sense of restraint from this show. Even if the leads are pushed to the breaking point, it's not quite as gleeful about it as some others on this list; there's generally a sense of "fuck it, I've been through worse, I'm used to this", which doesn't quite push my buttons but may appeal a lot to other tastes. I could be convinced to give it a 10 though? Mixed feelings.

Xiang Long--The urge is to give this a 1000/10 but I'm a principled rater and cannot break my rating system! and yet! this show breaks my brain!! every day I have to get up and remember that Long Xiang shot his own subordinate in the head in an attempt to convince Bai Lusheng to quite a hunger strike and then proceeded to get mad at him for being passive aggressive while eating!!!! every day I go on living in this world. Fuck. He threw the dude's gun down a well, damn it! I will someday find a way to transmigrate into the world of Xiang Long and murder Long Xiang, but anyways: kidnapping, Stockholm Syndrome and an abundance of Lima Syndrome, torture, people getting shot and whipped and blown up etc etc etc..... 10/10 bc I'm a principled person and will adhere to my rating system. If you watched this show for a reason other than whump, I'm not sure whether to fear or admire you, but you're stronger than me.

Some final notes:

I said in my last cdrama-whump-rating post that whump and serious drama do not correlate, but I've begun to think whump even flourishes MORE in a less serious/more over the top or tropey show. Xiang Long and Granting You a Dreamlike Life are great examples of this, as they both put melodrama over realism. Rattan and Addicted Heroin have a mostly light tone but can include some extreme whump without a tonal clash bc they aren't super serious about their whump either. In contrast, Reset and City of Streamer generally have a more grounded and suspenseful tone, and their whump level is low--even if people get hurt, it's rarely focused on. Meanwhile, Winter Begonia lies in a weird intersection of melodrama and tragic melancholy, and I think it's because it's whump tends to play more to the serious side of the show that in my head I'm always thinking of it more as angsty, less as whumpy. But maybe this is all due to how I classify whump rather than the inherent characteristics of whump in general. I'd be happy to hear anyone's thoughts!

#cdrama #cdramas #whump

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butter--peanut · 2 years

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“Add a Person”(E, 3713 words)

Happy Happy 30th to my lovely Nisi @wind-becomes-lightning! I am so thankful to have met you ~9 months ago (wow, somehow it feels much longer!). You are one of the kindest and most supportive people I know — and I think even if people don’t know you personally, everyone can see that today so clearly, when you decided to spend your birthday gifting others with gorgeous fics every single hour! Your productivity is remarkable, you are creative and an awesome writer and have OCs I’m in love with. You quickly became one of my closest friends and it’s been a joy to chat with you and nerd out with you and simp with you and at last to meet you!! I can’t wait to celebrate your birthday in person later today, but for now I hope you like this little gift to show how much you mean to me <3

Title: “Add a Person”

Pairings: Yamato/Sora, Kakashi/Sayuri, Yamato/Kakashi, and a little bit of Sayuri/Sora and Sora/Kakashi (I hope these last two are okay Nisi, I didn’t want to spoil the surprise to ask!!)

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 3713

Nisi’s OCs included in this story are Sora and Sayuri (links to their character bios). This fic is a sequel to Nisi’s story Ivy. Ivy is a modern day AU where Sora is a sex worker who goes by the codename Ivy and Yamato hires her. I was super intrigued by a few details Nisi included in the original fic (Yamato having kissed before but not who he kissed; the ANBU tattoo that Yamato got “with friends as a symbol that connected with our time together”; the way that Sora mentioned Yamato could always add another person to the app) so I spun those details around into this story.

On Wednesday, after Yamato had woken up and watered his plants and stretched in front of the slowly rising sun, then finally sat down on his couch with a coffee and opened the app for the escort service, he clicked through to select Ivy as he normally did, and then saw the little button that said, add another person.

He stared at it, and then he thought, why not.

Hey Senpai, Yamato texted Kakashi. Drink after work today? I have a proposition for you.

Yamato and Ivy had been seeing each other every Thursday for the past six months.

Yamato booked three-hour meetings now, uncaring of the expense because it meant he had more time to talk to Ivy after they’d had sex. They would lie together, sometimes her in his arms and others his in hers, and he would chat about whatever came to mind: questions about sex that she happily answered, his day, his friends, his plans for the future.

Oh, he wasn’t fooling himself. He knew that this wasn’t a relationship, and that all their interactions were transactions. But it was nice to pretend, for a few hours in a day, that he did have a girlfriend, and Ivy was happy to indulge him.

Amazingly, Ivy had started to open up a little more about her own personal life. Without going into too many details, she’d shared that she grew up in a well-respected family with a surname he’d probably heard of, in a large house in a prosperous suburb of inner Tokyo. That her job here was part-time, and that she was training for a different profession in her spare hours. That she liked her work for the most part. That the nicest part was helping other people to feel good.

On their last meeting, Ivy had been gently teasing Yamato about his lack of experience, and he had been smiling sheepishly, not at all bothered, agreeing, yes, you’re the only person I’ve had sex with. Yes, you’re the only person who has touched my cock. Yes, you’re the only person I’ve given head to.

“Am I the only woman you kissed?” Ivy asked him finally, and here, now, he could counter this, grinning and raising up a hand.

“Yes,” he said. “But not the first person I’ve kissed.”

Her eyes flared with interest, and then he found himself explaining his friendship with Kakashi.

They’d met in Black Ops when Yamato was a fresh-faced eighteen-year-old, and spent the next four years together, taking dangerous high-stakes missions across many different countries. (Of course, Yamato couldn’t tell Ivy the details; he left it at we were in the army together.) Yamato had been assigned to Team Seven, and he’d got to watch the flawless teamwork of Kakashi, Rin, and Obito, then wonders of wonders, contribute to that teamwork; feel like he was a truly appreciated part of their team. Kakashi had been his team leader, his Senpai, his guide, and at one notable point, the person who’d saved his life.

“I had a crush on him,” Yamato admitted, flushing. “He’s incredible, Ivy. And I think he liked me too. But, well, he was in love with a different teammate. And then that teammate died.”

He sighed into the bedsheets, unhappy memories resurfacing.

“I’m sorry,” Ivy said gently, touching his shoulder.

“It’s okay,” Yamato reassured her. “It was a long time ago now. But — before all of that, there was a night we were all drunk at a bar together.” He smiled a little at the memory. “Eventually it was just me and Kakashi left, and we were talking about all of Senpai’s experience with sex — he had a bit of an, er, reputation — and I mentioned that I’d never kissed anyone before, and Senpai said, well, want to change that? And then we kissed. Nothing else. I wasn’t ready for anything else then, and he understood.”

“He sounds like a very kind person.”

Yamato snorted.

“Well, yes. But he’s also a bastard. Especially now.”

“You still see him?”

“Every day,” he said, unable to stop the fond smile. “We work together now. The government got Rin, Kakashi and I all jobs.” He hesitated, then said, “They offered him a management role.” Coordinating the entire black ops contingent and strategy for deployment. “But he said no. Wanted a quiet life after everything that had happened. Now mostly I see him wasting company time playing with this pug he brings into the office or reading silly porn novels that he likes.”

Ivy looked considering.

“And you’ve never thought of anything more with him? Anything more than kissing?”

He grinned at her. “Are you asking if I’d like to have a threesome with you and one of my friends, Ivy?”

She blinked, surprised, then laughed softly. “No! I just know that you’re curious to try new things, Yamato. That’s one of the parts I really like about you. I want to support you with your exploration of yourself.”

Ah, Ivy was so supportive and sweet and eager to help him. That, he was sure, wasn’t just part of her professional act. Just one more reason he liked her so much.

“I wouldn’t want to see him without you,” Yamato said, certain, and Ivy’s gaze softened further as she looked over him.

Then there was a spark of playfulness.

“Well. You know what I said on our first meeting. You can add a person in the app.”

---

Kakashi wasn’t hard to convince. He’d always had a very low threshold in agreeing to sex, and when Yamato phrased it as a way of self-exploration he said, “I’m all for my cute Kohai’s self-development. Let’s try it.” He took a sip of his beer, then added, “And I’ve never been to an escort service. I’m curious to see what it’s like.”

Despite knowing Kakashi’s general comfort with sex, Yamato really hadn’t expected it would be quite this easy to get him into bed. His eighteen-year-old self’s heart would have been beating clear out of his chest with the thrill.

(Maybe that itself was why Kakashi agreed so readily: that Yamato’s heart wasn’t beating that way anymore. Kakashi must have known Yamato’s crush had lessened a lot since those initial days — and he knew how much Yamato talked about his friend Ivy).

The morning of, Ivy texted him. She had his direct number, now, because it was so much easier to coordinate unexpected delays or cancellations than on the app. (He was sure that was why she had given him her number. The extra conversation that they engaged in was just a lovely side-effect.)

I have a proposition for you :) Ivy wrote. My friend started working here a few weeks ago. She needs experience with larger group bookings. And I thought, since you are inviting your friend, maybe I could invite mine? From what you said, your friend could be open to this? And you are by far my nicest client. It would be the best introduction for her. No extra charge. :D

Her nicest client!

But Yamato had a reputation for being nice. Many people had called him nice. This surely didn’t mean anything.

Of course, he texted back. As long as Ivy was there too, this sounded like an exciting experience.

The next evening, Yamato went to the regular love hotel that he and Ivy visited. He arrived right on time, even though he assumed Kakashi would be at least half an hour late, because it gave him the opportunity to shower with Ivy, pressing her up against the glass, peppering the vine-patterns on her skin with kisses. Foreplay only; getting ready for the main course.

When they were showered and cuddling up together on the bed, each wearing half-opened fluffy red robes, Ivy said, “I know you said your friend would be late, but it’s strange that mine hasn’t arrived yet.”

Then the door slammed open, and a woman with a long black coat, heeled boots and black hair in a ponytail pointed behind her and said, “Sora, please tell me this stalker isn’t the client for tonight!”

“Er.” Kakashi walked through and waved. “Yo, Tenzo. There seems to have been some confusion.”

Oh, no. Kakashi was going to be the end of him.

Wait. The woman had called Ivy—

“Sora?” Yamato said, turning to Ivy, and Ivy was looking at the woman with the same incredulous exhaustion that Tenzo currently felt for Kakashi.

---

Yamato suggested tea, because that tended to calm tensions. They had tea, and Yamato heard the story.

On the way to the love hotel, Kakashi had walked out of the subway station, head firmly in his book — he’d purchased a new volume of Icha Icha just that morning, and wouldn’t rest until he’d finished it.

It was snowing today, and he had been walking up to the block of the hotel when he drifted to the edge of the street, aiming to avoid a new thick clump of snow piling up the street.

Then a taxi’s door was thrust open, and Kakashi tripped clean over the door, face-planting into the snow below.

“Senpai!” Tenzo said now, laughing. “What happened to your reflexes?”

“I’d reached a really good part,” Kakashi explained with a sigh.

A woman had stepped out of the taxi, and Kakashi had put out a hand and started to say, “Don’t worry about it,” expecting that she was about to apologise profusely.

“Why don’t you look where you’re going!” she said instead.

“Um.” Kakashi stared at her. “I was reading…”

Oh no. Where was Icha Icha Spa Day? It had dropped out of his hands when he fell.

The patch where it had fallen was outside of the was dark. He could barely see a thing.

He dropped down onto his knees, tapping the piled snow.

“Oh, come on,” said the woman. “Don’t tell me you’re going to pretend you were injured from that. I don’t have any money and I’m definitely not compensating you for a non-existent injury—”

“It’s my Icha Icha.”

“Your what? That doesn’t sound like any body part I’ve heard of.”

“No, not my — my book. I’ve lost my book.”

The woman sighed in annoyance, then dropped down next to him, letting the bottom of her black coat drip into the slushy snow.

“Urgh,” she said, starting to push her bare fingers through the snow. “Make me feel bad by stepping in front of my door and then freeze my fingers off, why don’t you.”

“You don’t have to help me.”

“Oh, no, you’ve guilt tripped me now; clearly I do. Though maybe this is all just some sick ploy to give a poor random passer-by hypothermia — oh, hey!” Her voice rose in triumph, and she pulled up the snow-covered, sodden Icha Icha Spa Day from the ground. “Here you are. Your,” she stared at the cover, “your porn…”

She handed him the book.

“What’s your name?” Kakashi asked.

She stared at him suspiciously. “Sayuri. Why?”

“Sayuri,” Kakashi said, “thank you for finding my book. And,” he gave her a hurt puppy look, “thank you for also ruining it.”

Then he hopped up and made his way back through the streets, opening up the book, wincing at how damp it was. He could barely read the text anymore. He’d have to purchase another copy tomorrow.

He realised Sayuri was following him.

“What?” she said defensively, when he turned back to her.

“Are you looking for another way to trip me up?”

“Oh, come on! I was going this way already.”

As if to prove it, she hurried passed him, and then Kakashi was following her. Passing sniping comments back and forth as they continued to walk in the same direction.

All the way to the love hotel, and then to the same floor, and then to the same room.

---

Kakashi and Sayuri hadn’t stopped bickering the entire time. Yamato had rarely seen someone who affected him as much as she did. The only person Yamato had seen Kakashi share these snipes back and forth with was, well, Obito.

It was the strangest experience Yamato had ever had. They’d set out to have something like a foursome and now the two extra guests were just insulting each-other. Looking at Ivy — should he think of her as Sora in his head now? She’d admitted that was her name, but it hadn’t been something she offered him, so it felt wrong — she seemed to feel the same.

Feeling a bit helpless, Yamato said, “Well, maybe we should we just end this idea—”

“No,” said Kakashi and Sayuri, almost at the same time.

A pause.

“He’s apparently such a Casanova,” Sayuri said defensively. “I want to see if that’s all talk.”

---

Kakashi and Sayuri needed to shower, and while they did that Yamato and Ivy sat cuddling on the bed.

“Kakashi called you Tenzo,” Sora said “Is that..?”

“That was my name,” he explained. “But not anymore. I changed it when I left the army. But people who knew me back then, I’m fine if they call me Tenzo. It’s a memories thing.” He smiled at her, drawing closer. “Yamato is my name now.” He paused. “But your name is Sora? Would your prefer I keep—”

“You can call me Sora,” she said, decided. “I’ve wanted to tell you for a while. It was just — not professional.” She sighed. “Maybe I should thank Sayuri for giving up her name and mine and breaking about ten rules in half an hour.”

A flicker of excited desire drifted through him at the words. Her name — her real name! — on his lips. Sora could see that in his gaze and her expression turned playful. She pulled him back onto the bed and fully on top of her, her robe opening so that Yamato’s naked body was flush against hers, just their robes flaring out on either side. They kissed, familiar and comforting, and Sora started to run her hand down Yamato’s chest.

“Do you think they’ll kill each-other arguing about who takes the first shower?” Sora asked softly.

“I would say no, but who knows. Kakashi is normally very laid back. But he was acting differently around her than I’m used to…”

There was a crash and a thump in the bathroom.

Yamato groaned and jumped up. “We leave them alone for one minute…”

He strode to the bathroom. “Senpai! What are you—?”

He had to trail off, when standing in the doorway looking through at what was inside.

The crash had been from the metal soap holder, previously hooked over the edge of the shower, now on its side on the floor outside the shower, all the soaps and creams also scattered there. The shower door was fully open, and mist unfurled through the door, water spray hitting the floor and bathmat beyond. Inside were Kakashi and Sayuri. Kakashi had Sayuri pressed against the shower wall, kissing her neck, one arm wrapped around her waist and the other pressing against the tiles behind her head. Her eyes were shut tight in an almost-angry desperation, and her fingers scrunched his wet hair tightly.

Yamato started to blush. He knew that watching the interactions of another couple was part of what he’d signed up for, but somehow being here, watching their intimacy firsthand, affected him even more than he’d expected.

“How are you feeling on the Casanova scale?” Kakashi asked Sayuri playfully.

“U-unfair experimental conditions,” said Sayuri. “It’s a shower. It’s naturally a sexual place!”

Kakashi looked up and stared at Yamato, and it was the sort of gaze that made his hair stand on end. Yamato now knew something of how Sayuri must be feeling. “Tenzo. Want to join?”

“It’s not really big enough, Senpai,” Yamato said, stepping forward despite himself.

“Fair enough.” Kakashi kissed Sayuri’s lips, then said, “Shall we go and say hello to the others?”

Sayuri turned the taps off, and now without the water raining down it was clear to see the flush of arousal on her face, eyes twisting from Kakashi to take in Sora and Yamato with a smile.

---

The kiss reminded Yamato of the last time, except that now Kakashi was entirely naked, body dripping from the shower, flush against Yamato, letting him feel all the muscles and — yes, his cock, jutting against Yamato’s own.

Perhaps a touch different, then.

He groaned helplessly, twitching closer to try and bring his body even further against Kakashi’s. Kakashi made a deep, satisfied sound on hearing him, sliding a hand down to cup Yamato’s ass.

Yamato felt a body press behind him now, and he could tell immediately from the line of her curves that it was Sora. She leaned against his back and said, “Time to make you a sandwich,” and it was the cutest way of describing this ridiculously hot action that he couldn’t help his giggle.

“How about a burger double?” Sayuri responded, copying Sora’s lead but against Kakashi. “You two boys are the meat, and the two bun halves kiss?”

Kakashi snorted against Yamato’s lips. “That’s the least sexual analogy I’ve ever—”

“Quiet,” said Sayuri. “Watch.”

She leaned forward past Kakashi, and Sora twisted past Yamato, and their lips met one another. They were both grinning while they kissed, Sayuri giggling a little. Yamato wondered if this was the first time these friends had done this together.

“You feel so soft,” Sayuri commented halfway through. “No stubble is heaven. I need to kiss more girls.”

“Is this like Icha Icha, Senpai?” Yamato asked.

“It might be better,” Kakashi admitted.

Sora and Sayuri broke the kiss, and then Sora turned to them. “Could you share him a little?” she asked Kakashi.

“Of course.” Kakashi shifted around the side of Yamato so that Kakashi’s chest was flush against Yamato’s back. “What did you have in mind?”

---

Kakashi ran his hands down Yamato’s chest, tweaking and twisting his nipples and following the line of his hips, while Sora rested comfortably on her knees, head tilted forward, tasting Yamato. She knew him so well by this point; understood exactly how to shift the pressure to make him moan, use the lightest touch of her hand like a skilled painter. Kakashi watched Sora’s approach and matched her speed and pressure with his fingers across Yamato’s body. Feeling both of them at once was a heady rush that made the blood pump through his veins and even quicker down his body.

Sayuri was watching at first, but soon she slid behind Kakashi and grasped Kakashi’s cock, gently stroking it. Yamato could feel Kakashi’s breathing increase, his body stiffening, and the groan he let out, loud against Yamato’s ear.

It was too much, feeling his own arousal and Kakashi’s arousal and Sora’s care.

“I’m going to…”

Sora nodded, smiling up at him, and she was so beautiful, he loved everything about her, he couldn’t believe how lucky he was to have met her—

He came, gasping, with Kakashi hugging him tight from behind and Sora swallowing him down.

---

“Thank you for taking care of my kohai,” Kakashi said to Sora, when Yamato had taken some moments to recover and Sora and come up to standing. “May I taste him from you?”

Oh, boy.

---

The kiss between Sora and Kakashi was almost chaste, slow and polite and explorative, and yet still, somehow…

“This is like the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.”

It was Sayuri, standing next to Yamato, eyes locked on Kakashi and Sora.

“I know what you mean,” Yamato admitted. “When you like both of them, and then see them together…”

She furrowed her brow. “I don’t like — urgh. Okay. Maybe I do.” She sighed. “Sora should have never offered me this job. I’m terrible at staying professional.”

“Honestly?” Yamato said. “I’m glad it turned out this way. Thank you.”

She smiled at him, and then said, “You’re all she talks about, you know. I might be unprofessional on the job, but damn, she wants to be too.”

Kakashi and Sora had paused their and were now watching Yamato and Sayuri, both with clear desire in their eyes.

“Let’s take this to the bedroom?” Sora suggested.

---

At one point Sora’s phone alarm rang to end the session.

Sora stepped to her phone, clicked off the alarm, and then put her phone in the drawer. She turned back, meeting their gazes in challenge, making no move to pick up her clothes, and Yamato felt the strongest wash of joy and excitement at the knowledge that this wasn’t going to end any time soon.

Given that Kakashi was pressed deep inside him, sweat slicked, shuddering with the force of holding back from spilling over, it would have been an awkward moment to stop in any case.

---

Yamato woke up with Sora in his arms, warm and peaceful, his body aching pleasurably.

Kakashi and Sayuri were asleep next to them. Kakashi was lying on his back and Sayuri was on her side, head was in his lap, hair streaming out across his chest, long-ago pulled out of its ponytail. Kakashi was awake. His eyes were half-lidded, watching Sayuri, expression imperceptible.

“Kakashi,” Yamato whispered, and Kakashi turned his gaze to Yamato.

“Morning, Tenzo,” he said with a small smile. “I have to say, if this is how evenings at escort services normally proceed, I’ll be booking them more often.”

Yamato snorted. He looked down at Sora, still feeling awestruck that he could use her real name now, and brushed some hair out of her face. Her nose scrunched up adorably.

“You won’t get this at any other escort service, Senpai. This was an, er, unique experience. Even for me with Sora.”

Learning her name. Meeting her friend, and Yamato’s friend meeting her. Going past the allotted time, all through the night in fact. Waking up in each-others’ arms.

This was messy, now, the line between professional and — whatever else they were, or could be.

But this too would be a new experience, and after so many years fighting pointless wars, Yamato wanted to take everything good that life had to offer. He’d be honest with her when they had a moment alone, tell her how he felt about her. And then see just what the future would bring.

#bp shortfic #love you nisi <333333333 #I'm sorry if this feels ooc I did my best but always nervous about writing others' ocs!

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randowwriter · 2 years

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I'm not sure what you've answered yet but for the writers ask game can I get 3, 8, 9, 20, and 28 😁

3. Yes, I do! XD Not super often, most of the time it's just when I'm proofreading ones (like for giftfics, requests, or anything I have to type up and edit, or when I'm proofreading a fic I wrote on a different day, or if I'm preparing to write a companionpiece or sequel). Outside of the editing or writing sphere, I will sometimes, but nothing before 2020 now is my current estimate. Because my writing style developed Summer 2020, so if I read anything older than that, it's very monotone and grammar-rigid, I guess I'd say. Not fun is more accurate. XD I tend to reread fics with a purpose when I do, though there are exceptions to that rule. Rereading my own original poems happens way more frequently, because I love my poems, especially the ones that feel like prayers, but also the ones with really fun metaphors. And some of that is out loud and some of it is quiet, but poetry kind of derived from oral traditions of storytelling, and so is somewhat meant to be read out loud (with the exception of particular poems).

8. More reviews make me laugh than make me cry, and some reviews do make me tear up honestly from being so sweet. A lot of the funny reviews are usually ones that a particular friend of mine leaves on my stories, because he and I joke around a lot, and it's just sort of what we do. (Or he'll review a fic for a pairing he doesn't even like, because of the AU or something, and I guess I'm evil, because I laugh. It makes me happy though that he'll brave through reading fics that he doesn't care for the romance of that I've written.) <3 <3 <3 9. Yes! Not very often, because I'm not the best at writing humor, but more recently, within this past year or so, I've laughed while writing stuff. Usually stuff with somewhat wacky events or plots, or in the case of at least one of my fics, where my friend reviewed the fic, made me laugh, and I reread it, to try to find the humor he saw and laughed when I reread it. :) 20. I prefer to edit as I go, if I spot a little typo or something like that here or there. I'm not a big fan of editing, and I haven't edited all of my fics. XD If a fic was written on something other than the computer (notebook or other device), I have to type it up, and when I do, I edit it then. On a story or poem that takes more than one sitting (rare for a poem unless something calls me away), I'll come back and reread what I wrote (even if it's just wrote) and edit then. Other than that, I'll edit it if I'm proofreading after. So, I guess it's sort of a both thing in terms of what happens, but I'd rather edit as I go. (Since I got myself into the habit of writing with pens lately, I've been crossing stuff out or writing words over top a line as I go, when I realize what I wrote needs help.) (Beforehand, since when I handwrite I typically use pencils, I'd just erase most of the time.) 28. Ooh! I haven't been actively working on the oneshots on my computer, but I might share a line from either a published work in progress multichapter fic or something I haven't typed up yet. I'll go with something I haven't typed up yet. (The other way feels like cheating.) XD Actually, now that I'm thinking I did start a new My Roommate Is A Cat oneshot recently (like a week or two ago), I'll share a bit of that if you don't mind. :) It's from the opening paragraph, and I guess, my writing isn't all that exciting here. XD "Home is a hard to define place, and yet Tora and Kuro make it possible, even though they have to fight to survive. Their home is a life of hardship, and yet they are friendly, opening up doors to others' hearts when those that come in really need it." On a different note, you did really good! The only repeat question was number eight, so you did really, really good! <3 <3 <3 Also, I'm a bit excited, because it's my first time getting a repeat question ever in an ask, so I feel honored. Thank you! <3 <3 <3

#sctwilightvampwolfgal #writer's ask game #My Roommate Is A Cat #Tora X Kuro #Tora #Kuro #cats #work in progress

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queen-haq · 2 years

Text

Fic: A Woman Reborn (Part 11)

Pairing: Billy Russo X Reader (from A Woman Scorned)

Rating: R / 18+ only

A/N: This is a sequel to A Woman Scorned and takes place a few years after the events of AWS.

MasterList (includes links to AWS and previous chapters here)

Summary: You and Billy are happily married when tragedy strikes, jeopardizing your relationship and everything you two have built together. Can the two of you find your way back to each other or is the special bond you once shared broken forever?

Gif credit: @benbarnesdaily

TW: Physical assault of a female character.

A/N - This looks at the events that happened in Chapter 9 and 10 from Billy’s perspective. You may want to refresh your memory by reading Chapter 10 again.

Blood seeped out of Billy, pain crunching through his ribs, fire burning his nerves. His skin singed with pain, every fucking part of him that could be damaged reveling in damage – but it wasn’t enough. Not enough close. If he thought being at the losing end of a fist fight with someone twice his mass would help take away the focus from the sheer anguish of seeing you with the goddamn lawyer – he was wrong.

Nothing helped.

The image of you – happy, smiling, enjoying yourself – it burned a hole through his mind. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. You were his and he was yours. That’s what you swore to each other, over and over again. The moments were so visceral and crystal clear in his mind, the images forever etched into his heart. And yet –

-yet, his mind had been a fucking blank canvas mere days ago. Memories that meant everything to him, defined him, made him feel loved for the first fucking time in this world, gave him a reason to live beyond just money and status, shown him that he was also capable of loving someone – all gone.

Slouched in an alleyway, bloody and bruised with a bottle in his hand, he took a swig even as blood dripped from his split lips.

The day he buried his mother, you were there next to him, holding his hand, giving him strength even though he tried to act like it wasn’t a big deal, like it was nothing that the one woman in this world who was supposed to love him hated his fucking guts. Yet you, a woman who had no reason to him offer him any solace had done just that. You held him, you comforted him. You loved him.

The night you finally opened your heart and told him about your parents – he still remembered the pain washing over your face. How much it hurt for you to share that part of you, and even though he’d known all along, it still felt like a punch to the guts to confront the abuse you lived through. You’d fucked him that night in the park, heart open, soul exposed and vulnerable, the two of you finally fully connected.

The same park where he’d followed you weeks ago, gun in hand, ready to end-

He shook his head, moaning not only from the physical pain caused by the vigorous movement but the sheer insanity of the asshole had tried to do.

Closing his eyes, he lolled his head back against the wall.

Images flashed through his mind, taunting him. Your eyes, your smile, the way you looked at him – in anger, in pleasure, when you woke up next to him in the morning, when you were riding him – the snarky bite in your tone when he said something to rile you up and you’d put him in place right away. Your hair, he loved running his fingers through your hair, grasping the stands tightly when he was inside you and fucking you and you were so, so, so close to coming, the soft gasps and moans when you finally did – he ached for you, ached for every bit of you.

Even the stressful moments lingered in his brain, reminding him of all the things you two had gone through.

After your surgery at the abortion clinic, he held you tightly in his arms, comforting you as the two of you walked to his car. You were pale and withdrawn for days while he took care of you, and he spent the entire time sick with concern that he’d pushed you into something you didn’t want to do. That you regretted the decision to end the pregnancy, that speaking his mind about not wanting a baby had probably cost him the very person he was desperate to cling to – but then later that week, just when he was ready to crawl out of his skin at the thought of losing you, you’d embraced him in your arms and given him the most tender kiss. It was your way of telling him you had no regrets, you two had made the right decision together, and he’d been overwhelmed with love and gratitude for having you in his life.

His home, his heart, his reason for living – you – you were all that and more and you were taken from him. Completely wiped out, because of a fucking accident. And now you were gone, lost to him, and all he wanted was to destroy the fucking world and himself along with it.

He managed to somehow stand up on his feet without falling to the ground. Alcohol numbed the pain from the beating but did nothing for his broken heart, if anything it felt worse, because all he could think about was you, and he couldn’t stop the memories of your life together from assaulting him. Drunk out of his mind, he found his way back to his building. And promptly passed out in the lobby.

***

Three nights later Billy was perched on a rooftop, sniper rifle in hand. He shifted a little in his position, and stifled the groan caused by the movement. He was still in a world of fucking pain – the beatdown by the bulky biker really did a number on him – but physical trauma he could deal with. Losing you, however, no. Absolutely not.

No one was going to keep you from him. No one.

Finally the blind fucker came into sight, walking down the street, heading towards his building. Unfortunately he wasn’t alone, a hobbit look-alike next to him.

Billy reminded himself to be patient. As much as he wanted to, he couldn’t just shoot the asshole with his friend beside him. So he waited while the two chatted, and then finally – fucking finally – the other guy left. He readied himself, watching, monitoring, as the lawyer turned towards the building entrance. Then, Billy fired the shot. Except the asshole swerved, as if he could hear the bullet coming.

There was no way in fucking hell that was possible.

Then the bastard turned around to look in Billy’s direction, like he knew where the shot came from. Humanly impossible considering Billy was perched a few buildings away.

Within seconds Billy disassembled the sniper rifle and quickly made his way out of there.

Something was going on with the lawyer, maybe even something that could hurt you, and he sure as hell was gonna find out what it was.

***

A few days later Billy picked the lock to your apartment – finding it way too easy for his own comfort, you definitely needed something more secure – and let himself in. He already knew he didn’t need to worry about you having any other security measures in place, you always hated the alarm system he had in the penthouse, finding it more annoying than helpful.

Your apartment was half the size of the penthouse, even smaller than your previous place, and lacking any homely touches. While he’d always preferred a modern décor, you were a fan of the bohemian aesthetic yet this place didn’t exhibit any of your usual taste. It was sparse and functional; it didn’t feel like you.

He sauntered into your bedroom, taking in every inch of the space. A queen bed in the north-east corner, unmade, pillows and comforter thrown haphazardly on top. A vanity situated on the opposite end of the room, your lipsticks messily lined atop, two bottles of perfume – one for special occasion, the other for daily wear – and some jewelry thrown in the mix. He pulled the lid from one of the bullet lipsticks, and he recognized the shade as one of your favourites. Ruby Woo. You wore it the night the two of you were married in a private ceremony, you in a red slip dress that matched the lipstick, so goddamn beautiful his heart was ready to snap out of his chest at the sight of you.

He opened the first drawer and found your underwear neatly piled inside. He picked up one of your bras, stroking the cups, raising it to his lips. It smelled of fresh linen, which was a disappointment. He’d hoped it smelled like you. Next his fingers ran through your panties, skimming along the various fabrics until he found what he was looking for. Purple lace panties. His favourite on you. An image of you in them flooded his brain, tantalizing yet painful. He folded the fabric and put it back in place.

As soon as he spotted the velvet ring box in the second drawer, that agonizing heartache returned. Jaw clenched, he opened the box. It was your engagement ring and wedding band, a symbol of everything you two meant to each other now hidden away from sight. His thumb caressed over the spot on his finger where his own thicker white-gold band used to sit. He hadn’t worn it in years yet his hand felt naked without it. Before the accident, he never took it off – which meant it was either damaged in the crash or they cut it off of him. Destroyed, just like him.

His fingers traced the engagement ring, remembering the sheer amount of time it took to find it. He’d sourced tons of jewelry stores, antique places, websites - but nothing seemed right, none of them felt like you. And then one day when he was a complete mess from a big fight you guys had and walking by a random Indian jewelry store, that’s where he spotted it. A blue sapphire stone bordered by small diamonds, the design so unique it instantly reminded him of you. And he’d bought it immediately, even though you weren’t even talking to him at the time.

He closed the box, slid it inside his jacket pocket. You loved this ring and it must have taken a lot for you to put it away. Stomach tightened into knots, he reminded himself when it was the right time he’d put it back where it belonged – on your finger.

Phone buzzing, he pulled it out to check his messages. It was a text from one of the janitorial staff at Anvil, letting him know you had left the office a few minutes earlier. That meant you’d be home in about ten minutes, probably tired after having to work on a Saturday. Exhaling a resigned sigh, he exited your apartment.

As much as he wanted to stay and wait for you, he didn’t want you to feel under attack by him. You’d have plenty of reasons to hate him anyway when he returned later tonight – but he didn’t care. Maybe there was a small part of him that understood why you slept with the lawyer but there was no way in fucking hell he’d let it continue. You were his. And the two of you had wasted enough time already.

***

That evening he returned to your apartment and found you napping on the couch, curled up on your side. His eyes inhaled you in, memorizing every inch of you and etching the image into his brain. You looked so soft and vulnerable, almost like a child, and his heart jerked at how much he missed you. You murmured in your sleep, shivering a little, and he looked around the room to find a throw. Not spotting any, he went into your bedroom and grabbed the comforter from your bed. Returning to the couch, he threw it over you, tucking in the corners so you wouldn’t be cold.

For a while he sat on the floor, simply watching you sleep, and then, unable to resist touching you, his hand smoothed down the messy curls of your hair. He kept his touch deliberately feather-light so as not to wake you, but just caressing your hair wasn’t enough. He wanted more, needed more, so he delved his hands under the covers and stroked down the length of your arm. You moaned, leaning into his touch, and he took that as a sign to continue.

“Billy,” you murmured in your sleep, your eyes still closed.

His heart soared, realizing you were dreaming about him. You still missed him, you still ached for him, the way he ached for you. No one and nothing had changed that.

As Billy sat there mesmerized at the sight of you, you stirred, groaning softly while his hand dipped under your skirt. His fingers found your cunt, your sweet fucking cunt that he hadn’t touched and tasted in so long and every part of him was dying to fuck you and make you his again. Drifting closer, he kissed you gently, the tip of his tongue skimming along your lips before sucking on your bottom pout. He was hard, so hard, and he was so desperate to be inside you, to immerse himself in the fucking heavenly perfection that was you, to remind you that you belonged to him – except you were still asleep.

After not being together for so long, he was frantic to see you awake when he was fucking you. He needed to see your eyes glaze with lust when he was thrusting in you, feel the heat of your skin as your fingers marked his back and your teeth dug into his shoulders, hear you screaming his name when he made you come. You had to know it was him inside you, not a fucking dream or vision, but him in flesh and blood.

Reluctantly he pulled his hand away from your pussy, and your forehead creased with disapproval. He smiled, angling forward to drop a kiss on your temple and then on the tip of your nose.

Soon you’d be awake and hating him again, so he chose to cherish this moment. The silence that hung in the air made it easy to pretend the accident never happened and that you two were still married. It was a regular Saturday night and you’d fallen asleep on him like you tended to do whenever he picked the movie. Clinging to that thought, he took a seat and waited for you to wake.

***

The apartment was empty as expected. Krista worked at a hospital two days of the week and Billy wasn’t expecting her to be home for another couple of hours. It only took a few minutes to find the key taped to the underside of the large filing cabinet in her office and then another hour to actually find her secret safe.

Then he started poring over everything she kept locked in there.

By the time Krista returned home, Billy was lounging languidly in the kitchen with a glass of whiskey in hand. At first she seemed surprised to see him but then a happy smile curved her lips and she slithered closer. Standing on her tip-toes, she wrapped her arms around him; he stifled the urge to push her away.

“You remembered,” she murmured. “I thought maybe you’d forgotten about my birthday.”

Billy smirked. He had no fucking idea. “I’d never forget that.”

Her smile stiffened. “We do need to talk about what happened, William. You’ve been avoiding me ever since you returned to Anvil.”

Withdrawing from her arms, he headed towards the whisky bottle sitting on the counter. “Want a drink?”

“You know I don’t enjoy that stuff.”

“More for me then.” He felt her eyes boring into him, trying to crawl through his exterior and burrow deep inside his brain. Maintaining his nonchalant composure, he poured himself another shot before turning around to meet her gaze. “You’re right. We do need to talk.” He gestured for her to take the lead, following behind her.

She walked to the living room and settled on the couch, patting the spot next to her. He didn’t take the seat, leaning back against the fireplace as he swallowed the rest of his drink and put the empty glass back on the mantle sans coaster. Oh, she didn’t like that. Not at all. As much as he wanted to grin at the hateful glance she shot him, Billy curbed the urge.

“You owe me an apology. I was worried about you,” Krista said in that extremely condescending tone she liked to use when talking down to others.

“Why were you worried?”

“Because reliving the past is the last thing you should be doing. It could unravel all the progress we’ve made, if it hasn’t already. William-”

God he fucking detested the way his name rolled off her tongue like that.

“-not everyone in this life gets a second chance. However, you did. You were given a clean slate to make something of yourself and now it’s all in jeopardy.”

“Is that what I’ve done, Krista? Put my future at risk?” he taunted.

Lips pursed, she stared back at him disapprovingly. “Yes. The more you entrench yourself in your past-”

“The quicker I’ll get my memories back?” He narrowed his focus, finally expelling the furious hate he felt. “And sooner I’d stop being your fucking puppet?”

She stood up, stiff, formal, ready to discipline him like he was a fucking child. “I will not allow you to speak to me like that.”

“Sit. The. Fuck. Down.” He didn’t yell or rage, there was no need to. “Now.”

She remained frozen, studying him through guarded eyes.

Billy pulled out the gun that was tucked into his back holster and noted the immediate fear in her eyes. Feet crossed, arm stretched out along the fireplace mantle, he adopted a relaxed posture and put on a smile. “I’m not going to ask again, Krista.”

Tense, she sat back down. “You have your memories back.”

He cocked his eyebrow. “Few weeks at Anvil and they returned just like that.” He snapped his fingers with his free hand. “Funny how that works.”

“Are you here to kill me?” she asked, trying to sound calm even though he heard the tremor in her voice.

“Depends on how this conversation goes.” He sauntered towards her, purposely taking his time as he pushed an ottoman with his feet and positioned it in front of her. He sat down on it, peering at her closely.

“I’ve been good to you, Billy. We’ve been good for each other-”

“Stop talking. I’m not here to listen to your bullshit.” He pressed the muzzle of the gun to her temple, holding it there. “There’s nothing I want more than to shoot you dead right now. I think about you’ve done to me, how you fucked up my life, and I just want to. Fucking. End. You.”

“All I’ve done is help you.”

He sent her a bitter smile. “Were you helping me when you asked me to hit Y/N? When you encouraged me to push her away? How about when we started fucking even though I was a goddamn mess and you were my fucking doctor?” Bile rose in his throat, making him want to retch but he kept his composure, refusing to get side-tracked by the intense disgust he felt for her. “You cost me the only woman I’ve ever loved.”

“I didn’t make you do anything you didn’t want.”

He pushed the muzzle so that it dug into her skin, making her wince. Good. He wanted her to suffer, to feel the same kind of excruciating pain she’d unleashed in his life.

“From now on, you’re gonna leave Y/N alone. Permanently.”

Despite being afraid, Krista glared up at him defiantly. “No.”

There was a beat of silence. And then he slammed down the grip of the handgun on the side of her head. Hard enough to hurt, but not permanently damage.

She screamed in pain, clutching the spot as blood gushed out. Grabbing a throw, he handed it to her. “Use this. Or you’ll get blood everywhere.”

A swirl of fear and anger brimmed in her eyes as she took the cloth from him hesitantly.

“Are you ready to listen to me now, Krista?”

Although she didn’t respond, tending to her wound, he recognized that she was fully alert and focused on him.

“Only reason you’re not dead already is because of your corpse. My connections no longer exist thanks to you, and I can’t exactly just leave your rotting body here. There’d be too many questions, an investigation. It would get too messy and I don’t want to deal with the goddamn headache.”

Of course that wasn’t the entire truth. He was still planning to kill her - but he needed to find a way to clean things up without arousing any suspicions. Until then, he just needed to wrangle her under control.

“So I’m feeling generous. As long as you listen to me, you get to live. If you go after Y/N, you so much as glance in her direction, those special patients of yours-”, eyebrow raised, he regarded her closely – “the ones from the mob who don’t want you to use any recording devices during the sessions? They won’t get to find out you’ve kept very vigilant notes about every fucking thing they’ve told you in confidence.” The surprise on her face made him snicker. “Yeah, I found the key and your super-secret hidden safe. And I have the files.”

Panic flitted across her face, reaffirming his suspicions.

“The deal was no recording devices and no documents, right? But you broke the deal, Krista. And something tells me the mob won’t be as generous as I am.” He stood up, glancing down at her with a cold, hard look. “So what will it be? Do I throw you out the window now or will you behave?”

Still bleeding, she looked away. “I’ll leave her alone.”

“Good.” He smiled, tilting her chin up so she could see he wasn’t fucking around. “And before you come up with any ridiculous idea about coming after me, you should know I’ve made arrangements to have all of that shit released. If I don’t check in everyday, your special patients will get everything you have on them within an hour. So tread lightly, Krista. And don’t piss me off.”

She yanked his hand away, staring straight ahead.

“Do we have a deal?” he prodded.

“Yes.”

“Good. Then I hope our paths never cross again.” He offered her a salute before exiting the room, eyes fixed on her reflection in the mirror that stood in the hallway. “Happy Birthday, Krista,” he called out before slamming the door behind him.

Relief surged through him knowing you weren’t in immediate danger anymore, but that didn’t mean you were safe. Krista was a fucking bitch and even though he’d managed to get her under control, it didn’t mean she wasn’t going to retaliate. He needed to kill her, soon, and do so without getting caught in the process, and that wasn’t going to be easy when he didn’t have the same resources as before. But that didn’t mean it couldn’t be done, he just had to be smart about it.

Once the bitch was gone for good, the two of you could finally move on and restart your life together.

A/N - Thoughts? As always, truly appreciate and cherish every feedback and messages that you guys leave me.

Tag List.

@yourfavoritefruitybitch @voyevoda-thejoy @adreamemporium @queenmalhinewahine @gubleryum @galaxyjane @xceafh@maralisa124@tomhollandisabae @daybleedsintonightfa11 @lil-baby-nor @all-art-is-quite-useless @tanyaherondale @nashibirne @dour-trash @thetallassgirl @athenamikaelson @agent-jbarnes @primadonnasdream @aleksanderwh0r3 @elisemockingbird @nihilismworld @archisur@nemesis729 @lysawayne@kaqua @ladyblablabla @lemasonda@advictedtohim @24-martie @tarkanelima-blog @shinebrightlikeafanbase @krystal-clear1 @damalseer@dontjinx-it@darkishx @wanderlusting-about-life @thatguppienamedbae @happypepperdog @bat-revival @sassygirl25 @consulting–heroes @the-celestial-kitsune @mackaywhore @ablxssm @competitive-dust @red-head011 @exo-1204 @sunsetenigma @millieb-3199 @chatnain @licensedcheek @tinkertailor1212 @vertesalope @safetyhtom @acourtofglassandroses @eliwinchester-barnes @finnismyoriginalsin @weallhaveadestiny @beananacake @beauty-and-the-beast97 @smurfelle @fire-treasure-iii @charly-0 @kestrafagnor @pigwidgeonxo @damagelove @allegra-writes @pensandthings @jad3djay @batshitbarnes @kashimayuki @secretsthathauntus @odetostep @awesome-eccia @mackaywhore @stories-you-wont-hear @vvsdiamond28 @supernaturalcat7 @arieltwvdtohamflash @iknownoqueenbutthequeeninme @devs-stufff @ticosas @moodacheeks @myakai13 @carlywhomever @fvckthisbxtchup @its-evita-here @papapapadumb @talesfrommycell @bat-luna-cat @fific7 @elluvians @dailydoseofchoices @everythinghappens-love @papapapadumb @mylife-love-and-other-things @bigcreatorwombatdreamer @ancientbeing10 @natty2245 @stuckysavedmylive @kasslucilfer @simp-for-ben-barners @originaldeputycalzoneegg @bdffkierenwalker @kimoranelson03 @sadbi-hours @haushinka27 @haushinka27 @caylaxwrites @extraneousred @agentmstark @crazywitchkitty @its-an-idea-not-a-blog @partypoison00 @fictional-hooman @hoglady @helnicks @luckyfreakfishpeach @chiquitita18 @rachlovesactors @icecream50055 @doloreschanal @lupinsfavslytherin @swthxrry @wanderlusting-about-life @dreamer7black @leahnicole1219 @superawesomegeek @weallhaveadestiny @toxicenough @tiiffanym @dark-twisted-and-mechanical-mind @cap-just-said-language @edithsvoice @natashasilverfox @ohsorandomlyme @lupoliatova @alltheloztboys @bl0ckedurl @nothingbettertosay81 @antideppresants @clarissahunter @profoundme444 @shazianazir05 @zos-things @my-day6 @thelightinmyshadows @lincerad @ramadiiiisme @blanchedelioncourt @wondergal2001 @aunicornmademedoit @sarcasm-n-insomnia @outlawadvocate @loki-yoursaviourishere@littlebobree @daybleedsintonightfa11 @fire-treasure-iii @binooo98 @ilsalicechepiangeva @lilypad-55449 @arimistery @evanscavillstan @theblogofb @iamgettingalife @eginv-blog @profoundme444 @derangedcupcake @ just-a-harmless-patato @simp-for-ben-barners @itzzzzcookie @iammyownloverr @lieselottec

#billy russo x reader #billy russo #ben barnes #billy russo x you #the punisher

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angryschnauzer · 3 years

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Mad Enough To Kiss Me

Summary; Sy reminscises he and his wife's summer party whilst he's meant to be working.

Pairing; Captain Syverson x Wife 'Jess'

Fandom; Sandcastle (Movie), Henry Cavill - Actor.

Warnings; NSFW, oral sex (female recieving), unprotected Vaginal Sex, exhibition kink, pregnancy.

Word count: 1246

This is a sequel to 'The Bite of the Bear' which is Walter Marshall x Reader.

I do not run a masterlist or tag list, however if you follow @angryschnauzerwrites and put that blog onto notifications, you'll then get an alert every time i post new work.

Fic entirely written and posted on mobile, so any typos are allowed to run wild and free.

Mad Enough To Kiss Me.

Sy sat at his desk, frowning at his laptop as he tried to concentrate on his taxes but the scene outside would draw his attention from the screen every few minutes. Sitting back in his chair he let out a sigh and crossed his hands behind his head.

The lake sparkled in the low Autumn light, the maples and cedars that surrounded it a sea of rich colours. But no matter how beautiful the treeline was, his eyes were always drawn to the floating dock in the lake, and a smile would tug at the corners of his lips. It had been late summer, a little over two months ago, when he and his wife Jess had their annual party. Friends and family from far and wide always made the effort to come, but what was making the smile on Sy's lips grow wider was the memory of Jess that night.

Jess was a firecracker, she'd called him out on his shit the very first time they'd met, and he'd fallen instantly in love that very moment. Over the days and weeks that followed he'd gone out of his way to get her to yell at him and get her really riled up. When eventually he'd asked her if she was mad enough to kiss him yet she'd screamed at him before launching herself at him and knocking him to the ground straddling his waist, and they'd practically torn each others clothing off there and then.

What followed was a few years of Sy working out the last of his enlistment, always ensuring he came back to their shared home on the lake, and throwing a party to celebrate the anniversary of the 'are you mad enough' day. Looking back to the floating doc Sy thought to the way he'd set up the fireworks on that night so that the 20 minute display only needed one fuse to be lit at the very start, meaning they had 19 minutes to indulge in little exhibitionism kink they'd discovered they both enjoyed. Laying his beautiful wife out on the spread of cushions and blankets he'd scoured from the house, he'd stripped the pair of them naked before burying his face between her thighs. He would get cunt drunk on her peach, and his only regret that he had to limit himself to just ten minutes of making her come on his tongue, but he needed to leave time to fuck her too. Having made her come at least three times with his mouth he'd crawled up her body and slid home deep into her waiting pussy, groaning as her tight walls gripped his considerable girth. Flipping them over he relished the sight of her riding him, spearing deep into her soft body as they were illuminated by the fireworks overhead. They were some of the best 9 minutes of his life, and some that they repeated for an encore on the patio table once all their party guests had left for the evening.

Back in the present Sy looked down, realising he was sporting a semi and with a growl he palmed himself just the once before clearing his throat and sitting straight, returning to his taxes on screen. Taking a gulp from his mug he was greeted with a mouthful of cold coffee, grimacing at first but then licking his lips, enjoying the maple cinnamon creamer Jess had added. Taking a few more smaller sips he smiled at the taste, somehow it reminded him of her essence. Perhaps it was that every single thing in the house was currently some version of a seasonal spice scent, or just that he was so in tune with the taste of her, that when he'd woken her up with his head between her legs that morning she'd tasted different. Her peach had a mellow tartness to it, and he couldn't get enough of it, making her come three times before she'd finally pushed his head away with a laugh;

"Sy! I got shit to do today, just fuck me already!"

He'd done as she'd asked, and an hour later when he'd watched from his office window as she'd walked down the driveway to her car to go run errands, she'd waddled a little and it had given him a virile sense of pride that he'd fucked her so good even after all this time that she still couldn't walk straight.

With a laugh and sigh he set the mug down and swore he'd concentrate on his taxes, and an hour later when he heard the front door shut he'd finally made good headway into his admin.

"Hey Cupcake!" Sy called out to Jess.

"I'll be up in a second!"

He concentrated on saving his work, smiling when he heard her footsteps on the wooden stairs, before her head appeared over the wooden railing. He watched as she approached, appreciating the way her body moved, especially noticing how her dress made her titties look fantastic, she must be wearing a new bra or something because he could have sworn they were bigger.

Walking up to him she pressed a kiss to his lips before sliding a box onto the desk.

"Hey thanks, new boots" Sy smiled, before moving to pull her into his lap, surprised when she dodged out of his way.

"Don't you want to check out the boots? I heard they changed the design slightly"

With a sigh Sy laughed;

"Sure thing Cupcake"

Lifting the box he frowned, it was surprisingly light considering the boots he favoured usually weighed a couple of pounds. Setting the box on his lap he shot a glance quickly to Jess and saw she was grinning but trying to hide it by chewing on her lip. What was she up to? She wasn't one for pranks.

Carefully opening the lid when he saw what was inside his throat went tight;

"Are you sure?"

Jess nodded, her eyes now watering with tears threatening to spill, waiting for him to finally say it.

"Cupcake…" Sy choked out, lifting the tiny pair of hand knitted wool booties, the white plastic stick of a pregnancy test sticking out of one showing a clear pink mark for a positive result.

Feeling tears start to well in his eyes he rubbed at them with his fingers and thumb, setting the box aside as he took Jess's hand and pulled her onto his lap. Pressing a kiss to her lips he grinned and let the tears start to spill, resting his massive hand on her stomach;

"We're gonna have a baby" he stated, Jess nodding and cradling his face in her hands

"We sure are Sy"

"How far along?"

"About ten weeks"

"Ten weeks…" the cogs and gears in his mind started to turn, and as he did he twisted his chair until they could both see out to the lake; "Ten weeks ago i was filling that peach of yours out on that dock, in plain view of all our friends"

Jess giggled;

"I know Sy… so, have i made you mad enough to kiss me?"

With a sigh and a smile Sy pulled his wife close to him and pressed a kiss to her lips, before lifting the booties and setting them gently onto her stomach. Resting her head on his shoulder Jess wrapped her hand over his, safe in the knowledge that the kid growing inside her would have the best father possible.

#syverson x ofc #captain syverson #henry cavill #syverson smut #henry cavill smut

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blouisparadise · 2 years

Photo

Upon request, here is a list of bottom Louis fics with bad boy Harry. If you enjoy our rec lists, please be sure to like the post and reblog it to spread the word. Happy reading!

1) In Which Harry Has A Thing For How Tiny Louis Is | Mature | 4535 words

Louis moves in next door and the second Harry sees him he wants him in his bed. When it's raining and Louis is locked out Harry invites him in.

2) Clusters of Stars | Mature | 5738 words

Louis doesn't have the best history with guys. When Harry shows up, totally different and covered in tattoos, things change. Liam and Zayn don't really approve but it's none of their business ey?

3) Own Up | Mature | 6756 words

/Pregnant./ Surely, that's what those two pink lines meant on the stick he just pissed on ten minutes ago. He immediately regretted that night with Harry three weeks ago. He was an above average student, acing every class, and he didn't even have the knowledge to prevent this situation. He was eighteen years-old and about to become a parent. The boy dropped the test to the floor and cupped his hand over his mouth as tears welled in his eyes, overwhelmed with the entire situation.

4) Here In The Dark Is Where New Worlds Are Born | Explicit | 7573 words

Harry is a demon and Louis is his eternal mate.

5) Always and Forever | Explicit | 11087 words

"I am the prettiest flower, 'ight 'azzy?"

"Yeah pup, the prettiest flower to bloom in The Tomlinson's residence."

6) Head Over Feet | Not Rated | 15361 words

The high school AU that nobody asked for featuring bad boy Harry who really isn't that bad, smart Louis having to tutor him, and chemistry that leads to lots of sex.

7) Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night | Explicit | 15395 words

The one 1997 AU where Harry is a bank robber and Louis falls in love with him.

8) Sweet Revelation, Bitter Wine | Explicit | 20786 words

An enemies to lovers AU with Harry as the infuriating demon that activates Louis' demon slayer curse.

9) Nicotine | Explicit | 32345 words | Sequel

"We're two different types of people, Liam. He likes sex and drugs, I like theater and tea. Trust me, we'd never date." Except they would, they do, and neither of them plans on letting go anytime soon.

10) Take My Pure (And Wash It All Away 'Til I'm Cured) | Explicit | 40932 words

And Louis decides, as the boy slowly starts backing away with that cheeky grin lighting up that whole stupidly beautiful face, that he should sue him for emotional abuse just for the fact his pecs stretch the fabric of his shirt like that alone. He really should. He might even win the case.

Fuck.

11) Spoonful of Sugar | Explicit | 42900 words

Note: This fic is a sequel to this fic.

Louis Tomlinson cares for his family above all else, a fact that’s led him on a twisted path peddling drugs to support them. Just as he’s made the decision to jump ship, Louis gets snared between the two largest crime syndicates in the city. To keep his family safe he’s forced to trust the man that failed to keep his promise two years ago, the resident drug lord he’s unknowingly been working for, Harry Styles.

12) Baby Heaven’s In Your Eyes | Explicit | 120925 words

A sixth form!AU where Harry is the fucked up bad boy with too many problems, Louis is the perfect rich boy with too much money and their schools are right across from each other. They meet at a party and that’s the last (and maybe the only) thing they need.

13) With The Exception Of You | Explicit | 137399 words

Due to the not-so-accepting timeframe of 1950s Los Angeles, Harry and Louis had to keep their relationship a secret.

They hid it well... or so they thought.

14) Collision | Not Rated | 207413 words

Mythology/Fairytale!AU in which Louis is a dainty fairy with a temper who wants to be intimidating and Harry hurts people. Naturally, they hate each other.

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

#bottom louis #top harry #bad boy harry #fic recs #blp fic recs #blp

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midnightswithdearkatytspb · 3 years

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VelvetCardiganBucky’s Recommendations 2021: Week 12 & 13 | March 14th – March 27th

Welcome to weeks 12 & 13 of my recommendations, if you would like to be featured on a future list, I follow the hashtag #VelvetCardiganBucky, message me, tag me in your future works, or reblog this post and link to your story, one-shot, Masterlist, writing challenge, etc.

Be aware some if not most stories and writers on this list are meant to be consumed by an audience of those 18+. My blog is also an 18+ blog.

✨Page breaks are made @firefly-graphics✨

«Last Week

Week 14»

My Masterlist

My Fic Rec List of Mafia/Mob Bucky/Sebastian & Steve/Chris/Andy

Stuff I Posted This Week:

Steve + Bey = 4Ever » Steve Rogers and Bey carved places in each other’s hearts, that no one else could ever replace.

I Hear A Symphony » Bucky Barnes x Mutant!Reader — Reader plays an important song to her for Bucky.

—Formerly The Winter Soldier » “I’m no longer the winter soldier, my name is James Bucky Barnes & you're part of my effort to make amends.”

Lee Bodecker

(Mini) Series:

*Give In by @not-a-great-writer » soft!dark!Lee Bodecker x shy!Reader — She didn’t think she was anything special. So when the intimidating Sheriff takes an interest in her, she can’t help but feel a little unsettled. Her boring life is about to get a little interesting. | This story has to be one of my all time series I’ve ever read, and I know I will weep when it’s over. The chapters are decently sized, you have angst, fluff and smut. I couldn’t ask for more, it’s simply a masterpiece.

Deadbeat Pt. 9 by @the-witty-pen-name » Lee Bodecker x F!Reader — You work at the bar at the edge of town, the Sheriff is going through a divorce and needs to rent a room. | Cole thank you for feeding my current Lee Bodecker obsession after I watched The Devil All The Time, for the time. This story is good and I love soft!Lee, and one where no one dies. At least I hope no one dies...

SamBucky

One-Shots:

Loving You Is Cherry Pie by @river-soul » Sam Wilson x Reader x Bucky Barnes — When Sam Wilson, one of your regulars at the cafe finally asks you out, you’re ecstatic until he tells you he wants his friend to join. When you meet Bucky, you decide it might be worth your while after all. [Allusions to stalking, exhibitionism and explicit sex, 18+] | There is just not enough SamBuck stories out there and we have @river-soul to thank for feeding our love for the boys and giving us some good smut, especially to tide us over till Friday.

Nothing Good Happens After 2 AM by @callmeluna » Sam Wilson x Reader x Bucky Barnes — You are admittedly a handful when you’ve had a few drinks in you. Luckily, your partners Sam and Bucky are more than up for the challenge… maybe. | If you are looking for something to make you laugh, might I suggest reading this? The whole time as I read this I couldn’t get the huge smile off my face, it was that good.

Bucky Barnes

Drabbles:

Matching by @heli0s-writes » Bucky Barnes x Reader — Reader and Bucky are “matchy matchy,” with their belly button rings. | This is adorable as well as very funny.

One-Shots:

Smooth Criminal by @bestofbucky » Bucky Barnes x Reader — Based on a dream @velvetcardiganbucky had. You’re parents told you to never give rides to strangers, but when you notice Bucky Barnes trying to break into your car, you know some strangers aren’t so bad. | Jenny did my dream justice! I honestly couldn’t have asked for anything better.

Don’t Over Do It by @whisperlullaby » Bucky Barnes x Reader — Your boyfriend is an asshole. Bucky reminds you that you are perfect the way you are. | I can’t describe this anyway other than perfect, that I wish I had a Bucky like this there for me. Trust me you’ll love the ending.

Coming Home to You by @angrythingstarlight » Biker!Bucky Barnes x Reader — Your Biker boyfriend is finally home and he’s going to show you how much he missed you. With every inch he has. And you’re going to remember how much he loves you. | It’s not very often you read something that has an alternate ending and when you do you find yourself loving both endings. Both endings are hot, the smut is great, again who couldn’t love Biker!Bucky?

Won’t Let You Go by @kind-of-crazy-butthatsokay » Mob!Bucky Barnes x OFC!Kori — Kori met Bucky in one of his clubs, out to get shit-faced with a couple of friends to forget about her worries and maybe take home a guy to further rid herself of her numerous frustrations. Little did she know that the one-night stand with Bucky would turn into so much more than that. | Thank you so much for entering my writing challenge, it means so much. This one-shot is so good, it hit me right the feels and left me falling in love with Kori and Bucky.

Show Me How To Ride by @angrythingstarlight » Beefy Biker!Bucky Barnes x Reader — You’ve been keeping a secret from your biker boyfriend. He is going to get the information out of you one way or the other. | It’s hot and it makes you realize just how much you realize just how much you love Biker!Bucky.

Bubble Baths by @floatingpetals » Bucky Barnes x Reader (Modern AU) — Even your boyfriend Bucky, needs to wind down at the end of a stressful with a bubble bath, but he doesn’t want to do it alone. | Okay, so my summary of this sucks but let me just say this is fluffy and smutty all at once. I wish I had Bucky to take a bubbly bath with.

Bad Boy!Bucky Barnes x Shy!Reader by @gagmebucky — in which there’s nowhere to sit and bucky offers his lap—then, subsequently, his cock. (bad boy!bucky x shy!reader, dirty talk, exhibitionism and voyeurism, cockwarming, unprotected sex.) | *chugs water* yeah is it a little hot in here? I probably would have failed class if Bucky had been in my class along with Steve, I wouldn’t have known who to stare at, forget learning the material.

**Greater Good by @fuel-joy » Bucky Barnes x Reader — There is a cure for the zombie outbreak but is it worth the cost. | Grab your tissues, because you are going to need them. Thanks darling for entering my writing challenge and making me feel so many feels with this one.

(Mini) Series:

A Tender Heart ♥️ Pt. 2 by @river-soul » Alpha!Bucky Barnes x Omega!Reader — You’ve been sweet on Bucky since you started working at the compound six months ago. Normally quiet and mild mannered, an unexpired fight with a coworker brings Bucky into your orbit. [A/B/O dynamics, brief mention of bullying and fluff] | If anyone can pull at your heartstrings it’s @river-soul making the beginning of this series look so promising and I can’t wait to see where it goes.

Run To You 🪙 Pt. 10 🪙 Pt. 11 🪙 Pt. 12 by @bestofbucky » Mob!Bucky Barnes x Bodyguard!Reader — Mob boss Bucky Barnes hires you to be his bodyguard. | Jenny left me at the edge of my seat, making this such an amazing story, I always look forward to her updates, and so sad that there is only 1 chapter left.

Better than Working sequel to This by @angrythingstarlight » Beefy Biker!Bucky Barnes x Reader — Beefy Biker Bucky shows you all the benefits of working from home. In fact what he has for you is so much better than work. | Sometimes you just need to read something hot to lift your spirits, let this do that.

Stucky

One-Shots:

*Tell Me What You Want by @angrythingstarlight » Mafia!Steve Rogers x Reader; Mafia!Bucky Barnes x Reader — Your mob boyfriend, is none other than Steve Rogers and he is willing to get you whatever you wanted, all you have to do is ask. And be careful what you ask for because he’s going to give it to you over and over again. | This is so hot that I highly recommend not reading this anywhere out in public. The smut in this is just *chefs kiss*

(Mini) Series:

Miracle Pt. 2 🥀 Pt. 1 by @heavenhatesme » Soft!Dark!Bucky Barnes x Reader; Soft!Dark!Steve Rogers x Reader — When infertility threatens mankind with extinction and there hasn’t been a baby for almost 18 years, what happens when two certain super soldiers fall for the same woman and accidentally impregnate her? | It’s not tagged as dark, sorry to the writer I tagged it that please forgive me? But I just want to tell everyone heed the tags. I do look forward to reading what happens next. The smut in this is great!

Invisible Ink by @navybrat817 » Bucky Barnes x Reader, Steve Rogers x Reader; Bucky Barnes x Reader x Steve Rogers — The owners of the Howling Commandos Tattoo Parlor want to make you their best girl. | I love the idea of tattoo’d Bucky and Steve, but that's because I have a weakness for tattoo’s. So this series is just right up my alley, and the start of it is so good that I know it’s good to be a great one!

Steve Rogers

Drabbles:

Chocolate Milk & Dino Nuggets by @nony-bear » Steve Rogers x Reader — Daddy Steve helps make his little girl feel better after a long week. DDLG THEMES | Had me wishing I had a Steve to make me Dino nuggets after a long day at work. It’s precious folks.

Prompt 4K Drabble Challenge by @sweeterthanthis » Steve Rogers x Reader — “Show me how deep you can take it.” | You’re going to need an ice cold bath after this one.

One-Shots:

A Cruel Tide by @writerwrites » Nomad!Steve Rogers x Reader — A lost hero thinks she needs saving, but this divorcée’s needs were different, fleeting, and then full of attachment. Can they overcome the burdens on their shoulders and keep their word? | Sometimes you want to wrap the reader and Steve in a blanket and protect them while enjoying the smut. This gave me that and more.

Untitled Request by @navybrat817 » Steve Rogers x Reader — Sending Steve a naughty photo while he’s in a meeting leads to punishment that will remind you to never do it again, right? | Hi, I’m just going to drench myself in ice cold water. ✌🏻

(Mini) Series:

*Control Pt. 3 🔐 Pt. 1 🔐 Pt. 2 by @river-soul » dark!Steve Rogers x Reader — When a probationary agent asks you out on a date you learn Steve’s intentions for you have evolved. He doesn’t take kindly to someone touching what’s his. [Noncon, physical violence (biting), grooming behavior and explicit sex, 18+] | Definitely one of my favorite series to read on Tumblr so far, you know it’s dark, and the smut is great. I always look forward to the updates on this one.

*Lipstick and Crayons 🖍 Ch. 4 by @oneoftheprettynerds » Dark Mob!Steve Rogers x Reader — Steve can’t ever repay you for what you did. After meeting you, Steve believes his broken family is the missing piece in the puzzle of your own wrecked one. Indebting the crime lord to you has been the biggest mistake of your life, cause now you can’t get rid of him, no matter what. Loyalty and favours go a long way in the mob. | This story always gets my heart a racing and leaves you with questions as to what is going to happen next. I truly love it and Soft!Dad while being Angry!Mob boss Steve all at the same time, this story just has it all for me.

This Is My Unbecoming by @river-soul » Werewolf!Steve Rogers x Witch!Reader — When the Hydra pack graduates from turning humans to swell their ranks to kidnapping and murdering witches to consolidate power, Steve knows he needs to strike. He makes a deal with a powerful coven leader for a witch of his own in exchange for destroying the rogue pack. [Magical realism, biting, blood, slightly dubious consent and explicit sex, 18+] | Okay this is so good and I would like to thank the teenage mind of @river-soul for creating this! Like seriously thank you. I look forward to reading more!

It’s been a long, long time ☕️ Ch.1 by @mostly-marvel-musings » Steve Rogers x Reader — Steve Rogers – a man who has lost too much finds himself blending into the crowd in attempts to forget his past but revisits familiar places and spends days sketching his heart out. A rainy evening leads him to find shelter in your coffee shop. Is having meaningful conversations over endless cups of coffee with a stranger the key to unlocking a heart that’s lost the will to love? | The prologue tore my heart out, it truly did but the first chapter just puts the pieces back together. I really love this and I’m honestly looking forward to reading what happens next. I can’t thank you enough for entering my writing challenge!

*Not A Team Part: 1 by @shedobewritingalittle » Steve Rogers x Reader — The Reader tries to live a normal life, but her memories won’t leave her alone. Rhodey comes to visit the reader with a proposition. | There aren't a lot of stories out there that have walk on parts with Rhodey in it and I didn’t know how much I missed out on having him in stories till I read this. This was just so well written and the characterization of Rhodey was perfect, how Peyton got the emotions written across, it’s perfect. Read this and have some tissues on hand. I will always love it.

Andy Barber

One-Shots:

Closing Arguments by @river-soul » Andy Barber x Reader — Andy and you are going out for the first time since your daughter’s birth. Anxious about leaving her behind Andy does his best to make you feel better. [Fluff with explicit sex (f recieving), 18+] | So fluffy and sweet!

Keep the Heat by @ozarkthedog » Andy Barber x Reader — Andy fucks you in the coat. | Semi-Short and the smut is oh so good.

(Mini) Series:

Homebound 🏡 Ch. 1 by @fuel-joy » Dark!Andy Barber x Reader — You witness your neighbor kill his wife. You try to gather evidence all from the comfort of your home. | Prepare to be at the edge of your seat with this one, it’s just that good.

One Night by @darkficsyouneveraskedfor » Dark!Andy Barber x Reader — One night changes your entire life. | This is dark and exciting, with tons of angst in it. I love a real good dark!Andy fic and this is it.

Chris Evans

One-Shots:

Mirrors by @cherrychris » Chris Evans x Reader — “wanna know what i see? me owning you and this sweet little pussy” | Sometimes you read things that just blow your mind and this was one of those things.

*Work Party by @harrylovex » Chris Evans x Reader — you get drunk at a work party and chris looks after you… | This is really adorable and probably one of my favorite fluffy Chris Evans one-shots I’ve ever read.

Misc.

One-Shots:

An Act of Kindness by @stargazingfangirl18 » Jake Jensen x Female!Reader — A simple act of kindness seals your fate. | I would like to simply start of by saying that this was my first Jake Jensen fanfiction in years, or maybe my first one, and all I could was where have I been hiding from him? So good and glad I read this and so will you!

*Come Back Safe by @celestialbarnes » Sam Wilson x Reader — based on tfatws, you find out sam’s leaving for a mission, afraid to lose the man you love, you confront him, and he promises you to come back. | So fluffy you’ll want to cuddle it under a blanket fort and wish under a thousand starry night skies for it to come true.

(Mini) Series:

Fiery Friends Pt. 3 🔥 Pt. 4 by @wanderinglunarnights » Johnny Storm x OFC!Sophia Jones — Johnny invites his best friend Sophia to stay with him in his penthouse during quarantine. | I really like this story, because I find myself mentally rooting for Sophia and Johnny, also going you go girl. Looking forward to what is next for this duo.

Ensnared Pt. 2 🔗 Pt. 1 by @stargazingfangirl18 » Ransom Drysdale x Female!Reader; minor Robert Pronge (Mr. Freezy) x Reader — Robert preps you for the handoff to the smooth talking stranger who bought you, but before he lets you go, he wants to have a little fun first. | So good and hot. Honestly I look forward to hopefully finding out what happens between the reader and Ransom.

Made With Love by @ayybtch » Wanda Maximoff x f!Reader + Friends to Lovers — Wanda is an excellent cook but a terrible baker. A rough day leads her to the bakery in the Avengers compound where she meets you, the lead baker. After a dismal attempt at making chocolate chip cookies, you volunteer to help Wanda learn how to bake. Your friendship grows stronger with each successful recipe until the two of you stumble into something even sweeter than baked goods. | This story will constantly have you smiling, sure it’s only 3 chapters so far, but I started off reading it in a bad mood but by the 3rd chapter I was just so sappy and happy. I can’t wait for more!

Without Me by CuttingMyFingersOff » Legolas x OFC!Braigeth — Braigeth was an elf who has nothing but memories of Legolas to help her survive being imprisoned in the walls of Orthanc. That is, until she is able to escape and reunite with him. | I’ve been invested in this since my friend came forward to me with the idea for this story and now that it’s being written, I couldn’t be more excited to read it. I need more Lord of the Rings in my life if I’m being honest.

Forever and Ever More by @syntheticavenger » Dark Alpha!Ransom Drysdale x Omega!Reader — Ransom Drysdale may be Boston’s most eligible Alpha but he has his eyes set on you. With his inheritance hanging in the balance, he won’t take no for an answer, whether you like him or not. | Prepared to go on a Hawaiian EMOTIONAL roller coaster with this story, there are so many times in this story you find yourself picking your jaw up off the floor. I’ve linked you to chapter 9, which has all the previous chapters, listed.

Is A Shout Out To My...

@bluemusickid in celebration of 700 followers is hosting a Holi Celebration Writing Challenge, that is due April 30th, but extension can be given. Any Marvel or MCU characters can be used in addition to Chris Evans and his characters. The theme is Holi and its colors, for better explanation visit the link provided.

@whisperlullaby in celebration of 700 followers is hosting a 700 Followers Challenge, your entries will be due May 5th. The theme is kinks, no RPF, DDLG/MMLG, bathroom related , incest, or under age kinks. This is MCU characters, Sebastian Stan, and Chris Evans characters x OFC or Reader. For more information visit the link provided. Congrats Becca on the 700 followers you deserve it hun!

@stargazingfangirl18 in celebration of 5K followers is hosting a Soft Dark Writing Challenge, which is due May 31st. Don’t let the name fool you, your writing can be soft, dark, or soft!dark, or headcanons about any Chris character. 500 word minimum with no max, but new or be read as a stand alone piece. For more information visit the link provided and be sure to congratulate Siri on her 5K milestone!

@cloudystevie in celebration of 4K followers is hosting a Mob!AU Writing Challenge, that is due on May 30th. You can use Chris Evans and any of his characters he’s played before, as well as make it NSFW or SFW. To learn more about it please visit the link below. Also congratulations Jasmeen on the 4K followers! 💗

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the-bau-quinjet · 3 years

Text

Nervous

Hello! This is honestly just a bunch of fluff (a tiny bit of angst bc Spencer worries about everything) and the reader being very nervous! I am currently writing a sequel to take place directly after this one! Read part two here!

Summary: Reader is arrested by the BAU! Little do they know, she is dating the one agent who is currently on medical leave...

warnings: none!

Word Count: 4954

“Are you sure you can pick her up today?” You are currently running around your apartment, phone held to your ear with your shoulder. You have to be at work in fifteen minutes, but first you have to drop your daughter off at school, and you’re running very late.

“Babe, yes. I’m almost completely healed and I don’t go back to work until tomorrow. I’ll pick her up after school and then meet you at your apartment when you’re done working. Okay?” Thank God for Spencer Reid. He has been on medical leave for 5 days, slowly going insane. But, it meant more time for you and Lily to spend with him, so you’re not complaining.

“That’s perfect, thank you so much! I gotta go, I love you!” You are in such a daze, you don’t stop to think about the three words that just came out of your mouth. You hang up before Spencer can respond as you wrestle with your six year old to put shoes on. Grabbing both of your coats, you run out the door.

You met Spencer Reid 9 months ago when he came into the hospital you work in with a concussion and some pretty bad bruises. It was really a chance meeting. Normally, you don’t even deal with patients because you work in research. But, your best friend asked you to run some lab results to a patient’s room and you couldn’t say no. Dr. Spencer Reid happened to be that patient.

He wasn’t supposed to be in the room, but apparently something happened with the CT schedule, and he was done earlier than expected. So, instead of simply dropping off forms in an empty room, you hit a man with a door. Why he was standing behind the door is still a mystery to you, but you felt awful. This man is in the hospital and to make matters worse, you come along and hit him! With a door! You offered to get him some coffee as an apology, and in his concussed state he said “Only if we can go together.” You’ve since realized that was smoother than he normally acts, but you don’t care. He is the most lovable man you’ve ever met.

You met up for coffee three days later, and have been dating ever since. He met your daughter, Lily, on the second date. They clicked instantly. You knew then and there that you would love this man forever. You have not, however, actually said I love you before this morning. But, you’re still in too much of a rush to stop and think about it… or even realize it happened.

You pull into the parking garage at the hospital 7 minutes late. Honestly, better than you expected. The morning flies by as you work on research grants and hospital studies. All in all, a pretty average day. That is, until you walk back into the building from your lunch break.

You don’t get a lot of visitors in the research wing, so it’s strange to see two pretty official looking individuals at the front desk. It’s even stranger to hear your name come out of one of their mouths.

“Hi there. We are Agents Morgan and Rossi from the FBI. We’re looking Ms. Y/N L/N. Is she here?” That must have been Morgan talking.

Spencer has told you a lot about his team. You feel like you know them all already with how many stories he’s told you. You’ve been hesitant to meet them though because of Lily. You don’t want her to get too attached to him and his friends if things were to go sideways. You haven’t really dated anyone since her father, so you’re a bit nervous. Spencer, of course, completely understands. He just wants you to be happy. It’s hard not to love him even more at the thought.

You are immediately thrown into a panic at the sight of the two agents. Your thoughts are running wild with possibilities. They must be here because something happened to Spencer. Wait. That doesn’t make sense. He’s not even working today.

Your panicked train of thought pulls to a stop when the two agents walk up to you. “Ms. L/N? Can we speak with you for a moment?” You nod, leading them toward your office.

“Of course. My office is just down the hall.” You can’t help but feel nervous at the prospect of meeting Spencer’s coworkers without him. Especially if it has to do with a case they’re working. These are the people he loves most in the world. They are his family. What if they don’t like you? What if they think you’re an idiot? What if they think Spencer can do better? It also doesn’t help that you know they can tell you’re nervous because you know they are profilers. You sit down behind your desk, offering them the seats on the opposite side.

“Ms. L/N, you’re in charge of the research department, correct?” Rossi says it like a question, but he clearly knows the answer.

“That’s right.” You are trying everything you can to get your nerves to settle, but it just isn’t working. You’re basically lying to two human lie detectors, even if it is just by omission.

“So if items were to go missing from this laboratory, you would be responsible for reporting it.” It was Morgan who spoke this time. It’s hard for you to follow their line of questioning. What would go missing? It’s not like you wouldn’t notice if a fume hood suddenly disappeared.

“I suppose so, although it depends on what items. We don’t have a specific inventory of commonly used products like syringes and gauze, we just order more when we get low.” You can’t decide which agent to focus on. Your eyes are flicking nervously between both of them.

“What about human tissue?” When the words come out of Morgan’s mouth, you freeze for just a second. You don’t have any human tissue in the lab, so how would it go missing? Of course, the profilers take the delay in your response to mean something other than confusion.

“We- we don’t use human tissue in this specific laboratory. We focus on small animal models. The other research lab is responsible for human tissue protocols.” You stutter through your words under the harsh glares of the two agents. It is really not helping your nerves.

“Then how do you explain this?” Rossi slides a paper across your desk. It’s housed in a large plastic bag with “EVIDENCE” across the top in big, block letters. It’s a form you have never seen before. The kind someone would fill out to transfer human tissue between labs. Your hands shake as you hold the paper, slowly trying to figure out what it is. You almost puke when you reach the bottom. It has your signature as an approval of the request. You drop the paper as if it has burned you.

“I’ve never- I didn’t- how did-” You’re cut off before you can try to finish your sentence, but you don’t hear what they are saying. You feel the cold click of metal around your wrists, tight enough to just pinch your skin. They lead you back out of the building, to a waiting SUV. You can’t help but be grateful that nobody was there to witness your arrest.

The ride to Quantico is silent. You keep trying to figure out how someone could have signed your name on that form, but you can’t focus. Your mind keeps drifting to memories with Spencer.

You remember your first date in the coffee shop a block away from the hospital. He ordered a black coffee only to pour in an exorbitant amount of sugar. He blushed slightly, as if he was embarrassed by his drink preferences, only for his features to transform into a soft smile as you did exactly the same thing. The two of you talked for hours, only ending the date when you had to go pick up Lily.

You remember running into him in the park with Lily, what you would come to refer to as your second date. He looked ethereal sitting at a table playing chess. Lily ran up to him, or rather the chess board he was sitting in front of, before you could stop her. She wanted to know what the horsey was for. You watched as he patiently explained to the five year old that it was a knight responsible for defending the king.

He told her how it moves on the board. He told her how it was special because it is the only piece that can jump over other pieces. He must have spent 15 minutes talking to her about this one piece. And she was enthralled. When he was done, he looked around to find the child’s parents only to meet your eye. You’ll never forget the way his smile grew when he realized Lily was yours. The three of you spent the rest of the day in the park, playing chess, walking around the pond, and getting to know each other.

You remember the look in his eyes right after he kissed you the first time. You remember how worried you were the first time he was injured on a case. You remember Lily asking you if he could be her daddy, and crying yourself to sleep that night because you wanted that too, more than anything, and you were so scared it wasn’t going to happen.

Then you finally remember he’s picking Lily up from school today. Suddenly, the car ride isn’t so quiet anymore.

“I need to call someone.” The words come out frantic and rushed. You are absolutely sure the expression on your face screams crazy, but this is about your kid, so you really don’t care. You need to call Spencer. Then he’ll come fix this. Explain how you couldn’t possibly be involved. The agent’s response is shorter than you expected.

“Why?” Rossi sounds skeptical when he asks it. You would later suppose that he had a reason to be skeptical of you. Right now though? You didn’t do anything wrong so the whole innocent until proven guilty thing feels a little fake to you at the moment.

“My boyfriend is picking up my daughter from school. I need to call him.” You don’t really know how to tell them said boyfriend is one Dr. Spencer Reid. You weren’t supposed to meet his friends yet and definitely not without him. You aren’t really in the right headspace to be deciding if right now is the best moment to out your relationship.

“If he’s already planning on picking her up, you shouldn’t need to call him.” It feels to you at this moment that they don’t even believe you have a child. Of course, they must know because they have the one and only Penelope Garcia to find out every little thing about you. Before you can say anything else, they are dragging you out of the SUV and into the building. You are pushed through security into an elevator that takes you to the fifth floor. The BAU. You thought the first time you visited Spencer’s work would be a happier occasion. And that he would be here. The whole situation would actually be kind of funny if you weren’t so worried and nervous.

The first thing you say when you are lead through the very intimidating glass doors is “JJ.” You would come to understand why that might earns some stares. The whole room is looking at you as if you have grown another head.

“How do you know my name?” That’s a loaded question. Spencer has showed you pictures of his godson, Henry. JJ happened to be in some of those pictures as he is in fact, her son. Of course, you can’t really articulate that because you are too stressed and nervous to form full sentences. It takes a lot out of a person to be arrested, dragged from their place of work, shoved in a car, driven two hours through DC traffic, and then pulled into the FBI building as a suspect.

Instead of properly calming yourself down until you can form a complete sentence, your eyes go wide and you say “Henry” as if that is enough of an explanation. If looks could kill, you would be dead.

“How do you know my son’s name?” JJ’s words are so harsh, you physically flinch.

“I.. it’s just that… You… Well… I-” You are a loss for words, yet again. You didn’t expect for Spencer’s best friend to ever look at you with such disgust. It’s honestly a little overwhelming to think the people he calls family all currently hate you. Even if they don’t really know who you are.

“Maybe a few hours in here will jog your memory.” And with that you’re left alone to sit in a cold metal chair and stare at your reflection.

Throughout your relationship, Spencer has tried not to worry. You frequently come home from work a bit later than you originally planned, especially if you feel like you got a late start. So, when you don’t enter your apartment right at 5:30, he doesn’t think anything of it. When 6:00 rolls around, he texts you. At 6:30 he calls. By the time it reaches 7:00 and he still hasn’t heard from you, he’s actively pacing your small living room. When his most recent call goes to voicemail, he breaks. He packs up Lily’s stuff and the two of them are on the way to Quantico, finding you being the only thing on his mind.

He replays his favorite moments with you in his mind as he drives from your DC apartment to Quantico. Normally, he’d take the metro, but if you really are missing it’s safer for Lily in the car.

He remembers the look on your face when you realized you hit him with a door. He couldn’t imagine a more beautiful person. You looked so guilty, he felt the need to hug you to tell you it was okay. It was a foreign feeling for him. He’s never been one to physically comfort people. Maybe it was the concussion. It was definitely the concussion that gave him the courage to ask you to coffee.

He remembers the fluttering of butterflies in his stomach when he watched you pour almost as much sugar as him into your coffee. The soft smile on your face as the two of you spent hours talking about anything he could think of to keep the conversation from ending.

He remembers the utter joy he felt upon realizing the five year old who inquired about the horsey on the chess board is your daughter. He remembers how he felt when he looked up, expecting to find an annoyed parent given that he just lectured a five year old on one chess piece for 15 minutes, but was instead met with your kind smile and loving eyes. He loves Lily just as much, if not more than he loves you.

He remembers how you hung up the phone this morning before he could say “I love you too.” And now the thoughts he’s tried so hard to block out are circling in his mind. The words repeating in his head, over and over. What if I never see her again? What if I can’t tell her I love her?

He pulls into the garage, carrying Lily so he can run faster into the building. He puts her down when they finally reach the elevator. She’s been surprisingly calm despite Spencer’s nervous attitude.

“Spencie, where is Momma?” Spencer’s heart constricts at the sound of her sweet voice. He doesn’t know where you are, and it terrifies him.

“We are going to find out! How would you like to see my desk? You can play with the cube I showed you at home!” He pulls a Rubik’s cube out of his satchel, placing it in Lily’s small hands. He guides Lily to his desk, telling her to stay there while he looks for his friends. She looks so tiny in his desk chair, he would stop to take a picture if his phone had that feature.

He finds the team in the round table room. His eyes scan the room, landing on JJ’s concerned expression last. He’s surprised to find Will in the room as well. JJ notices him before anyone else.

“Spence, thank God you’re here. We need fresh eyes.” Before he can protest, Morgan is filling him in on the events that have unfolded.

“We brought a suspect in from DC, and she knew JJ.” Spencer’s eyes go wide. If the team is in trouble, that could be why Y/N was taken.

“When I asked her how she knew me, her only response was ‘Henry.’ Something doesn’t add up.” Movement in the doorway catches everyone’s eye.

“Spencie, did you find Momma yet?” Lily stands in the doorway, looking straight at Spencer.

“Not yet sweetheart. I have some cookies in my bag, why don’t you go back to my desk and eat them, okay?”

“Can I have two?” The little girl holds up two of her tiny fingers, unaware of the confused glances from every adult in the room that isn’t Spencer.

“Of course, sweet pea. Whatever you want. You can even spin around in my chair!” The child nods before running back to Spencer’s desk. Spencer turns around to find all eyes on him. The entire team wears similar expressions of shock and awe.

“Spencie?” Derek questions the nickname.

“Sweetheart?” JJ’s more focused on how Spencer responded.

“Who the heck was that 'sweet pea’ and why have you kept her from me?” Garcia is glaring at Spencer for hiding such a cutie pie from her for however long.

“She’s why I’m here. Well not her, her mother. We’ve been dating for the last 9 months. I picked up Lily from school today. We were supposed to meet back at her apartment, but she never came home. She’s not answering my calls and I don’t know where she could be.” Spencer breaks down as he tries to explain what’s going on. He can’t imagine a world without you in it.

“Reid, give Garcia her phone number to track her location. This could all be related to our case. If someone is targeting the BAU, we will find them.” Hotch’s no nonsense tone calms everyone in the room. Again, movement in the doorway catches everyone’s attention.

“Sir, she keeps saying she can explain everything. I know you said 3 hours, but I think she’s ready now.”

“Thank you, Anderson. We’ll be right there.” The agent leaves without another word. Hotch turns back to continue filling Spencer in on the case. “Reid, we’ve got a suspect in custody. She doesn’t match the profile, but we think she knows something.”

“She mentioned a boyfriend in the car. He might know something too.” Morgan pipes in as well.

“I want to talk to her. If she knows where Y/N is, I have to talk to her.” Spencer is out of the room before anyone can stop him. He’s practically running across the bullpen to get to the interrogation room.

“Y/N?” Morgan questions to the agents left in the round table room.

You are so cold. They must have the air turned down to put you on edge. You have finally calmed yourself down enough to form actual sentences instead of useless mumbling.

“Please. Let me explain! I can tell you everything. Well, not everything, because I don’t know how my signature ended up on that paper, but I can tell you about JJ! And Henry! Let me explain!” You never thought about how weird it would be to know someone could be watching your every move. You feel like you’re talking to nobody as you beg for them to let you explain.

The door flies open with so much force, you fall out of your chair in shock. There are hands on you, pulling you to your feet before you’ve even registered hitting the ground.

“Where is sh- Y/N?” Spencer’s tone of voice changes so quickly your brain can’t follow. You just look into his before you burst into tears.

“Oh thank God. Spencer, I was so scared. I was so nervous when Derek and Rossi came to interview me. I didn’t want them to hate me, you know? Even though they didn’t know who I was. And then I saw JJ, and I got even worse. I mean, she’s your best friend! And she sounded so angry, which was my fault, but I couldn’t even form words to explain myself because I was so sure these people- the people you consider family- were going to hate me and I made everything so much worse. But I-” Spencer knows if he doesn’t cut you off, you’ll ramble endlessly. It’s always like that when you spend too much time alone. As if all the energy you could’ve spent talking to someone pours out of you all at once.

“Shh, baby, it’s okay. We can explain everything. I’m so happy to see you. To know you’re okay. God, I love you too.” You turn your tear stained face to look up at him.

“Wha- oh my God. I said that. I didn’t even realize I said it. But it’s true. I love you so much. I can’t imagine a world without you. That’s why I was so nervous about meeting the team. And they wouldn’t let me call you, so I couldn’t ask you what to do.” The two of you continue trying to fill each other in on what has lead you to this moment.

Hotch and JJ make their way into the room without either of you noticing. They both sit down before either speaks. “Reid, I’m going to need you to leave the room.” Spencer turned around with you still in his arms, your head pulled tight to his chest. He glares at his boss before responding. “No. She didn’t do this. The dates from the case file you gave me, they don’t line up. April 17th, we watched the new episode of Doctor Who and spent the rest of the night discussing theories. April 20th, we went to dinner to celebrate Lily’s sixth birthday. April 22nd we watched Tangled with Lily until she fell asleep and then we…” He trailed off, turning a bright shade of pink. You wiggled in his arms, trying to hide the blush on your face as well.

“Spence, where’s Lily?” You know he needs to leave if you are ever actually going to get out of this room.

“She’s at my desk. She looked so tiny in my chair.” He practically has heart eyes as he thinks back to where he left your little girl.

“Why don’t you go tell her you found me? I’ll be okay.” You wipe the remaining tears from your eyes as you sit back down in the cold metal chair. Spencer looks as though he would rather read Twilight again than leave you, but he reluctantly walks out of the room.

You start rambling before the agents get a chance to ask you a question.

“I’m so sorry. I’ve probably wasted so much of your time. I just freaked out when I realized I was meeting Spence’s family. That’s why I know your son’s name.” You turn slightly to look at JJ. “He talks about him all the time, and he’s shown me pictures. I’m so so sorry that you had to worry about your child’s safety because of me. I was just nervous to meet you. That’s why I haven’t met you yet actually. Because I didn’t want Lily to get too attached if something happened and we broke up. Not that I can imagine breaking up with Spencer. I would spend the rest of my life with him if he gave me the chance.” You can feel the tears brimming again. “I really don’t know why my name is on that paper. I never would have signed it! My lab doesn’t use human tissues.” You try to stress that point.

“Ms. L/N, we believe you. We never thought you were responsible, but it was a suspicious situation. You can never be too careful in our line of work.” Hotch still looks extremely serious, but his tone is slightly more relaxed than when he threw you into this room.

“Of course. I would’ve thought I was guilty if I didn’t know the truth. Is there anything I can do to help?” You are so relieved to know they don’t think you’re a crazy murderer.

“We need to ask you a few questions about the people who work in your lab.”

“Oh. Okay.” You have to actively force yourself not to start rambling again.

“Do you know any of these people?” The agent shows you three pictures of young women. They couldn’t be more than 25.

“No…” You can’t put your finger on it, but they look familiar.

“But?” JJ encourages you to continue.

“I’m not sure. They look familiar for some reason.” All three women have brunette hair and green eyes. Their face shapes are even shockingly similar.

“Do you know anyone who looks like these women?” You don’t know how they know that, but you do. They’ve planted the seed, and it instantly grew into a massive oak.

“I do! Her name is Renee. Um... Renee Watkins. She works in the hospital, in the lab where they run blood tests.” You look at the agents with hope in your eyes. Maybe now they’ll let you leave. They both stand up without saying anything else. Hotch leaves first. JJ stares at you for a minute.

“I really am sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. It’s just, you’re his best friend. If you hate me, we won’t work. He cares about all of you way too much for me to get in the way of that.” You honestly still feel awful about the unnecessary fear you’ve caused her and her family.

“He cares about you too. He’s been happier than I’ve seen him in years. I knew something was up, but I didn’t want to push him.” You can’t keep your smile off your face at her words. “Let’s forget about all of it. I’m just going to focus on the relief of knowing nobody is after my son.”

“Thank you. I really am so sorry though.” You feel the need to keep apologizing.

“Really, it’s fine. Come with me, there’s someone I want you to meet.”

JJ leads you back to the bullpen. Right as you turn the corner, you can spot Spence playing with Lily and Henry. He’s captivated their attention with a magic trick.

“He’s so good with them.” Almost involuntarily, your hand brushes over your stomach.

“He’s always wanted to be a father.” JJ eyes your hand before giving you a rather pointed look.

“Oh! No, I’m not pregnant.” You let your arm fall back to your side. “He’s just so good with Lily; she asked me if he could be her dad.” You can feel the tears coming again. “I just know that one day I will have that man’s babies.” JJ snorts and suddenly the two of you break out laughing. Your laughter makes enough noise to capture Spencer’s attention, two little pairs of eyes following his lead. All three of them are suddenly running across the room to you and JJ.

Lily jumps into your arms, much as Henry does to JJ. You pull her close, leaning into Spencer as his arms circle around you both. The moment is interrupted when Penelope Garcia comes running into the room.

“I’ve got him. Shane Harrison, 28. He dated Renee Watkins in high school. He was recently fired from his position in the human tissues lab at Children’s National Hospital. There are reports of him breaking in, although nothing was reported stolen due to falsified transfer documents.”

“What made him start killing?” Morgan asks while you and JJ desperately cover the children’s ears.

“Renee recently got engaged. She posted all about her new fiancée on social media. I already texted you the address.” JJ says a rushed goodbye to Will and the team is out the door. Lily runs back over Spencer’s desk with Henry so she can show him the Rubik’s cube.

“Aren’t you going to help them?” You turn to Spencer who hasn’t left your side.

“I think they can manage this one without me. I’m needed somewhere else at the moment.” As if to prove his point, he leans in to kiss you. It’s short and sweet and everything you needed at the moment.

The sound of someone clearing their throat pulls the two of you out of your bubble.

“Hi, I’m Penelope Garcia. I’m sure the Genius Doctor has told you all about me.”

“He has indeed. You’re even lovelier in person.” Garcia is just as bright and bubbly as Spencer described her. It makes you smile to think that the team has her never ending positivity while they are surrounded by so much darkness.

“We are having a team gathering at Rossi’s tomorrow night. You should both come. And Lily!” Garcia smiles again before walking away.

“You know that means we have to go, right?” Spencer asks you the obvious question.

“I know honey. You’re afraid of what Garcia could do to you if you get on her bad side.” You laugh at his pout, pulling him down the stairs and over to Lily. It’s about time you all head home.

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid #Criminal Minds #spencer reid fluff #criminal minds x reader #spencer #spencer reid one shot #mgg

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