#rapi tw

[proship-moodboards]

#the simpsons #bart simpson #sideshow bob #mod zeta #proship #moodboard #rapi tw #trypo tw

[milesproblemships]

I need to update my caard and add Octavia <3

#my art #helluva boss #octavia goetia #helluva octavia #self ship #self shipping #self insert ship #self insert shipping #dead dove selfship #dead dove do not eat #tw rapi #shipcest #antis dni #proshippers please interact

[rat-rosemary]

I am on my absolutely insane arc rn don't mind me

TW DEATH AND CANNIBALISM

You know how everyone took Schlatt's body apart and Quackity ate his heart? What if that was a funeral rite?

Not everyone knew it tho, they were taking bones because they wanted to disrespect Schlatt's grave

But for some people it was the bare minimum they could have done, to not let someone rot, to keep parts of them with you.

But what if, later during el rapis, Quackity asked Sapnap and Karl to eat his heart when he died? They were horrified of course, not only by the idea of eating their fiance, but also by the idea of Quackity dying at all. But Quackity had just lost an eye and a life and he insisted.

They talk about it, ask why Quackity would want that, and he explains that it means they get to keep him, that he will forever be part of them. That for him the act of being left to rot, even with a burial, it's the biggest act of abandonment that could happen. It's a long tiring night before they agree, but they promise that they never have to, because they will protect him with their lives and as long as they're still standing, Quackity will be safe.

-°-

Today Tommy shows up in Kinoko Kindom. He's stained with blood and ash. He asks if Quackity asked them to eat him.

Karl had forgotten the worse talk of their lives. George doesn't understand it. Sapnap is alone.

He goes with Tommy, let's him explain with a uncharacteristic somber and calm tone how to do it. Sapnap follows behind, completely numb. Karl follows Sapnap, not understanding what he must do.

Tubbo is there when they get to Las Nevadas, he takes them to where the body is being kept.

Quackity's face is covered in a piece black linen. His shirt has been methodically cut off. His body is covered in cuts and burns.

A dagger sits next to him.

Tubbo explains that Sapnap needs to take the first bite, he needs to be the one to eat the heart.

He does.

He eats and let's the two boys guide him away when he's done. They tell him that he can come later to get the bones. He nods, even if he's not truly here anymore.

They give him a chain with a pair of rings and hand him back to Karl.

He throws up on the way back.

-°-

Anyway, not really good but I wanted to write about Sapnap having to go through this alone because Karl forgot, and he promised (and also something or other about how even after everything, the fight and the abandonment and the anger, Quackity still wanted his heart to be theirs)

#karlnapity #tw canibalism #canibalism #tw death #i also have an entire brainrot about tommy in specific related to this #but i wanted to write quacknap angst #but anyway #the people who have those rites are #tommy. tubbo. wilbur. schlatt. quackity. phil. and fundy #fundy tho is not sure if that is the rout he wants for his death #but he does partake on the death of others #is this too insane? #it feels too insane. #the dog barks

[adibaputri]

Hari ini belajar apa?

Nolong orang sampe tuntas!

Flashback waktu sore hari habis ashar pergi ke Tawangmangu buat ikut acara camping se Solo raya (Acaranya islami gitu wohoho). Tentu udah izin ke ortu dan dibolehin jadi gas boncengan berdua sama temen. Tapiii sebelum ke acara camping itu kita mampir dulu buat kajian di UNS, Ini searah sama acara campingnya itu jadi ga izin deh ke ortu, pergi kajian juga bukan maksiat kok, ini hal baikk aman lahh insyaallah kalo ga izin. Pikirku saat itu awokkaok.

Kajiannya belum selesai tp kalo nunggu kajian ini selesai nnti kemalaman sampe tw nya, akhirnya mutusin buat lanjut perjalanan ke tw. Semua berjalan dengan lancarrrr sampe tiba² motornya bunyi dan di gas gabisa, menepi lah kita. Udah masuk Maghrib lagi, karna bingung ni motor kenapa tnya deh ke mas² yg mau nyebrang jalan, kenapa ni motornya di gas gbisa jalan pdhl di stater bisa. Terus kata masnya itu streng nya putus (?) dan kata masnya semua bengkel udah tutup udah Maghrib soalnya, hari Sabtu pulak.

Bingung lah aku sama temenku ini trus kita duduk di kursi depan bengkel yg udah tutup tepat ditempat kita menepi tadi, udah dicoba chat mas yg punya bengkel itu siapa tau bisa bantu (dapet nomer dari spanduknya) tp kata masnya itu bengkel gabisa ganti streng yg putus itu. Yasudah deh kita duduk sambil mikir, nggak lama setelah itu disamping bengkel itu keluar mas² pake outfit mau sholat ke masjid wkwk pake sarung, baju rapi, sama peci ngeluarin motor dari ruko yang agak gede, itu tempat usaha percetakan gitu deh kyknya. Aku yakin pasti masnya mau sholat Maghrib ke masjid. Waktu masnya udah pergi, aku bilang ke temenku "Lihat ngga masnya tadi, kayaknya masnya bisa deh nolongin kita" temanku jawab "IYAA jenggotan masnya" awokkaok 😀 salfok malah. Trus kita nungguin masnya balik dari masjid dehh, dan Alhamdulillah setelah balik dari masjid masnya langsung nyamperin kita tnya kenapa motornya trus aku jelasin blablabla tp masnya bilang juga kalo semua bengkel udah tutup. Sama² bingung deh, masnya sempet tanya "Mau gimana ini mba?" Trus aku jawab "Mentok² cari masjid trus tidur di masjid aja mas, besok pagi baru cari bengkel yg buka" sngt kasian kamu Adiba wwkkw.

*OIYA, kenapa ga kabarin ortu aja minta dijemput gitu?? Karenaaa Adiba sudah besar gamau repotin ortu 😋 kalo bisa selesaiin masalah ini sendiri, ya selesaiin sendiri, gausah libatin ortu takutnya malah ngrepotin ehe

Truss karna bingung harus gmn, aku tnya sama mas nya masjid paling deket dmn soalnya udah Maghrib juga dan belum sholat jadi mau sholat dulu ajadeh. Terus kata masnya masjidnya dekett tinggal lurus nnti belok kiri. Rencananya sih mau jalan ke masjid tp tiba² masnya kasih kunci motornya, katanya pakai aja motornya 😀 kueren masnya pdhl baru kenal, masnya juga gatau aku orang baik/jahad, bisa aja aku orang jahad trus motor mas nya tak bawa kaboor. Tp engga kok, Adiba anak baik 🙇🏻‍♀️.

Trus sebelum ke masjid aku sama temenku ini juga sempet chat ke panitia yg ngadain acara camping ini, tapi ga dibales² jadi yaudah deh sholat Maghrib aja dulu. Trus waktu kita sholat ternyata panitia ini telfon aku sama temenku tp hp kita di silent jadi gatau deh ada yg telpon toh lg sholat juga. Setelah selesai sholat dan buka hp ternyata beberapa panitia chat ke kita dan Alhamdulillah pihak panitia nawarin buat jemput kita pdhl jarak tempat camping ke motor rusak tadi 25 menit, mayan lah. Hbis sholat aku sama temenku balik deh ke ruko mas yg awal tadi.

Setelah 2 panitia Ikhwan ini sampe, mas nya bilang, motor yg rusak dititipin dikenalan masnya aja biar aman, trus Adiba dengan PD dan 100% yaqin bilang "Dititipin disini aja gapapa mas aman insyaallah, mas nya ini insyaallah Sholeh kok, amanah jugaa insyaallah" ehehe trus yaudah deh motornya dititipin ke mas² ruko ini. Trus aku boncengan sama temenku pake salah satu motor mas panitia ini dan dua masnya tadi boncengan juga deh.

Aku sama temenku ngikutin masnya dibelakang karena kita ga hafal jalan. Trus ditengah perjalanan ke buper, mas nya tanya "udah sholat belum? Sholat Maghrib udah belum?" Amann mas kataku dan temenku. Trus juga diperjalanan udah masuk isya, akusih mikirnya "Yaudahsih sholat isya di Buper aja nnti" tp ternyata masnya mampir ke masjid dulu buat sholat isya wuohoo keren (emang harusnya gini sih) trus masnya jamaah deh sholatnya. Setelah selesai sholat mau lanjutin perjalanan ke Buper sendal masnya ilang di masjid 😀 jadi masnya gapake sendal deh, trus ternyata rumah masnya ada dideket situ jadi mampir dulu ke rumah masnya buat ambil sendal.

Lanjutt perjalanan ke Buper, dan alhamdulillah sampe Buperr panitianya baik sekalii kita sampe langsung ditawarin makan dan tenda yg kita bawa diminta panitia buat didiriin, jadi aku sama temenku terima jadi ehee. Alhamdulillah

Trus gmn balik ke rukonya tadii? Bingung ga 😀 lanjut part 2 yaw awokkaok sudah panjang sekali ini ceritanya

Part 2 lebih ajibbb!!! Keren maksimal skenario Allah

23 Des 2023-24 Des 2023

[pratleskitties]

TW: death

Pernahkah kalian berpikir, kalau kalian berpulang, nasib kucing2 kalian gimana?

Di awal2 pandemi, ada banyak posting2an - baik di grup2 FB maupun medsos2 lain - soal orang2 yang terkena Covid dan either masuk rumah sakit atau tidak bertahan; dan teman2nya sibuk mencarikan foster/adopter untuk kucing2 peliharaan pasien/almarhum(ah) yang ditinggalkan.

Kalau kucing2 tersebut beruntung, mereka bisa cepat dapat foster/adopter - biasanya kucing2 yang sudah steril dan/atau mix/ras.

Kalau sial dan tidak ada yang mau mengadopsi, mereka dilempar ke shelter.

Terbayang, gak, kucing2 yang biasanya sehari2 bebas di dalam rumah 'sendiri', bersama2 kucing2 yang 'sekeluarga' atau sudah dianggap koloni sendiri, disayang2 1-2 orang dengan jadwal makan yang rapi di tempat2 yang tersedia -- lalu tiba2 dilempar ke shelter yang isinya puluhan, bahkan ratusan kucing2 asing yang menakutkan untuk mereka. Dapat makanan yang beda dari yang biasa dimakan, yang pasti akan bikin sakit perut (karena ga akan ada shelter di Indonesia yang sedia pakan hypoallergenic atau super premium yang tidak bikin mencri). Tidur di tempat2 ga jelas, mostly tidak beralas.

Atau yang lebih sial lagi, dibuang ke jalanan.

Atau masih ada yang mimpi bahwa kalau kalian meninggal, anak/adik/teman/sodara kalian akan dengan besar hati mengangkut semua kucing2 kalian dan mengurus mereka EXACTLY seperti cara kalian urus mereka?

Ha.

Saya tidak memiliki keturunan langsung, ataupun saudara kandung; walaupun sepupu/keponakan sy banyak. Ada diantara teman2 dan keponakan2 sy yang mengurus kucing dengan 'pakem' yang tidak jauh beda dengan sy (steril, vaksin, dikit2 ke dokter, pakan super premium, perabotan/mainan, vitamin, dll).

Tapi saya tidak mau MEMBERATKAN mereka untuk mengurus 8 kucing2 indoor saya. Walaupun insyaallah mereka mampu secara ekonomi dan sanggup secara hati dan fisik.

Keberatan sy bukan karena sy 'terlalu baik' atau 'berhati lembut' seperti kata salah satu onty yang sok2an menyindir saya. Ga guna, btw, menyindir saya, apalagi kalau kamu/kalian tidak hidup di rumah sy dan tidak tahu kehidupan dan penghidupan saya seperti apa.

Keberatan sy justru karena SAYA KENAL KUCING2 SY, dengan baik. Sy tahu apa yang mereka suka/tidak suka, dan apa yang menyamankan mereka sampai mereka tenang dan betah di rumah sy.

Kidcat: Jangan coba2 mengkandangkan Kidcat, apapun alasannya, karena dia bisa lolos. Sy pun ga bisa mikir gimana kalau *mitamit* dia sampai sakit dan harus ranap, gimana caranya mengkandangkan dia. Apalagi dia sudah 6 tahun, semakin tua dia akan semakin manja. Pun dia tidak bisa model dikasih makan langsung 1 mangkok sehari - yang ada judulnya semua dihabiskan saat itu juga dan akan dimuntahkan lagi. Also dia anxiety tinggi, kalau anxious terus muntah2.

Smartees: Every stranger is Stranger Danger! Bahkan pembantu yang tiap hari datang, pun. Jangan harap bisa menemukan/melihat Smartees sekalipun kalau dia tidak percaya sama kamu. Tetangga sebelah rumah pun jarang melihat Smartees.

Tokyo: PTSD takut dibuang. Kisah Tokyo sudah banyak sy posting. Tokyo butuh 1 tahun untuk akhirnya percaya sama sy dan mau dipegang2. Sy yakin dia tidak akan bisa langsung akrab dengan orang baru.

Espresso: Ya... berhubung dia sudah 14 tahun dan penyakitan, sy cuma basa-basi menyebutkan dia, karena insyaallah by the time saya berpulang, Espresso sudah duluan.

Tinney & Winnie: Kucing 'milik' nyokap. Dua2nya EGC dan tidak boleh makan ikan sama sekali.

Beedy: Mungkin yang paling bisa di adopsi orang lain adalah Beedy, yang friendly, easygoing, dan oyen. Tapi Beedy banyak tidbits yang harus diperhatikan, mis: suka makan karet gelang, tali2 mainan, bola kain, dll.

Jadi saya memasukkan kucing2 sy di SURAT WASIAT saya.

Dalam surat wasiat, saya meminta agar kucing2 saya yang tersebut di atas - jika mereka masih hidup saat saya meninggalkan dunia ini - untuk ditidurkan saja, alias di euthanasia.

Kenapa?

Karena mereka tidak akan bisa dirawat oleh orang lain tanpa berujung mereka - kucing2nya - yang menderita. Dan sy definitely TIDAK MAU mereka dibuang ke shelter. Sumpe kalau anak2 sy sampai dibuang ke shelter, gw bangun lagi dari kubur & obrak-abrik yang ngirim ke shelter.

Jadi dalam surat wasiat sy, selain sy minta mereka di euthanasia, sy meminta salah satu sahabat dan keponakan untuk bertanggung jawab atas permohonan sy tersebut.

Sy secara pribadi juga mengeraskan hati untuk tidak mengadopsi kucing2 baru (dan muda), karena sy tidak mau jumawa mengharap hidup dan income sy akan panjang. Pengalaman dan kehilangan2 (utamanya) selama pandemi kemarin mengingatkan sy bahwa nyawa sy (dan rejeki) tidak bisa 100% dijamin.

Plis ga usah komen kalau cuma bawa2 filosofi, apalagi bawa2 agama. Agama tidak ada yang menyebut2 soal covid, TAPI semua agama SELALU mengingatkan kita akan kematian. KITA yang harus berpemikiran untuk mengingat APA (dan siapa) YANG KITA TINGGALKAN setelah kita meninggalkan dunia. Kita yang harus MEMIKIRKAN mereka yang akan kita tinggal, utamanya yang tidak bisa menolong diri sendiri di tengah2 manusia yang sibuk dengan egonya masing2.

foto: Taglia, anak gadis buntut irit yang masih mencari pawrent(s) baru. Taglia bulan Desember ini berusia 1 tahun, vaksin F4, sudah steril. Kalau ada onty/ongkel yang kepingin jadi pawrent(s)-nya Taglia dan merasa memenuhi syarat (Pro steril, pro vaksin, pro dokter hewan, berpenghasilan tetap, rumah sendiri, bersedia tanda tangan surat adopsi bermaterai), dan berdomisili seputaran TangSel, silahkan inbox meowmmy, yaks! Taglia akan bahagia di rumah yang kucingnya sedikit, hoomannya banyak, dan mau kasih dia makan ikan kukus/rebus dan wf, df hanya buat cemilan. ;p

#tw: death #cats #adopt don't shop #adopsi jangan beli #prosterilgarisngegas #fostering saves lives #spayandneuter #spay and neuter #TagliaKitty

[ranuenxu]

peka

[ POV Raizel ]

Huft. Benar-benar hari menyebalkan yang penuh dengan masalah. Mulai dari subordinat yang gak becus nyusun dokumen di meja gua, banyak salah ketik laporan, hasil kerjaan yang gua minta berantakan, sampe hal-hal sepele yang micu banget buat gua naik pitam dari pagi.

Dengan kening sedikit berkerut dan tangan sibuk nunjukin dokumen yang dimaksud, gua bilang, “Yang ini benerin lagi, cek catetan yang pake pulpen merah. Yang ini gak lengkap dokumennya. Yang ini ... copy ulang. Salinannya itu buat arsip, bukan kertas bekas. Jadi, cek tuh notes dari saya. Sisanya-” tiba-tiba ponsel gua berdering dan tertulis nama Haruna di sana.

“Nih, cek catetannya. Sebelum jam 3 taro lagi di meja saya setelah disusun rapi,” titah gua kelewat dongkol pada orang yang sukses bikin gua naik pitam dari pagi ini dan mengangkat telpon dari Haruna setelahnya. 

Melengking banget suaranya sewaktu panggilannya diangkat, gua jawab aja dengan deheman pelan. Sekilas cek arloji di tangan kiri, ternyata ini jam setengah tiga sore. Inget kalo si bocil ini part-timer kasir di salah satu supermarket deket kampusnya, gua mutusin untuk lanjutin telepon pake TWS—soalnya pegel kalo gua pegangin dan tangan gua gak betah kalo diem doang. 

Latar suara di belakang anak kecil ini agak sus. Dari sedikit ramai seakan sedang bergibah terus berubah jadi ramainya suara pengunjung. Jelas aja bikin gua angkat alis buar cuma sesaat. Haru bukan anak yang suka keramaian soalnya. 

Sampe abis itu Haru bilang, “Eh, Gep ... gua mau gibah.”

Hm, mau gibah katanya. Mungkin kesannya gak sepenting itu, tapi anak ini pasti tahu kalo gua, Raizel, itu masih kerja di jam segini dan kalo dia sengaja telepon gua untuk cerita berkedok gibah ala ala atau apa pun itu, it means something bad has happened to her, no? 

Sombong dikit dengan ber-multitasking ria sambil dengerin gibahan Haru tentang lingkungan kerja dan pertemanannya di tempat dia part-time, telinga gua fokus dengerin cerita anak ini sedangkan indra gua yang lain bekerja seperti biasa.

Sesekali tangan gua berhenti waktu denger ceritanya. Kadang gua diem, kadang juga gua sautin dan kasih respon yang sebenernya agak sarkas atau bahkan bold, sesekali juga agak ragu, gua bahkan gak yakin kalo dengan cerita ke gua sebenernya bisa bantu dia atau engga? Gimana kalo setelah cerita sama gua dia justru kepikiran dan malah memperkeruh masalah dia?

Sampe entah gimana, waktu break Haru abis gitu aja buat dia ngeluh berkedok gibah ini.

"Gep, gua-"

"Balik jam berapa hari ini?" sela gua sengaja. 

"Jam 5."

"Gua mau ketemu klien daerah deket kampus lo, nanti balik bareng gua aja. Gua matiin, ya. Bye," kata gua sebelum tutup teleponnya dan jelas itu bohong. Lo semua inget kan gua nyuruh anak orang ngumpulin kerjaan dia jam 3 nanti?

Hm... Gua cuma gatau harus gimana, tapi mungkin maksa dia jajan yang manis-manis bakal ngebantu. 

[vivien-dot-exe]

enjibowl day 2: soulmates / fantasy au

nothing quite like a tyrant king and his dear unruly prince, am I right??

@enjibowl-week

#viv.jpg #enjishouto #todorokicest #todocest #enjibowl #incest tw #incest implied #rapi tw #listen I love shouto being a pretty armpiece for enji but I also love the runaway prince trope #so we get king enji reigning this unruly heir of his back in to question why he really thought he could escape him 😩 #also note: I briefly considered making enji a demon king bc hehe monster big sexie but then I remembered the lovely white mage cloak #and I just 'oooomg we Gotta make him some sort of monster slayer/witch combo. calls shouto 'blighted' like it's a compliment ok ok'

[dadboat-fr]

They Are In Love Okay!!!!! What About It!!!!!!!!!!1

#the yachtfather yells #hyperpop & lofi lol #when i saw lofi on the AH i was like. wow ok i guess hyperpop has a bf. and scrambled to find gems #rapi was kind enough to trade me g for t ; w ; ty for financing this lad so they could be 2getha 4eva #i wish we could use numbers in dragon names bc. lofi would be 100gecs. bc i am gay and in love w laura les. #OOGOGGG G I COULDA NAMED HIM OSNONE....................... fuck #big brain at the worst times i s2g #leopard gene #leopard tw #fr leopard

[g00d-cr1mes-w1th-sc4r-moved]

My mom: why don’t you read as much as you used to?

Me internally: I have thoughts I don’t want to be thinking and constantly need to have some sort of distraction so I don’t act on them or they end up harming me, and while reading was a good form of escapism in the past, I have found better, more useful ones

Me externally: I don’t know. Sorry.

[dont reblog]

#if I told her that she’d probably send me back to th/rapy #and I don’t want to go back #tw therapy mention

[twinkiemaximoff]

It Hurts Until It Doesn’t ❣︎

post-death!kyle spencer x gn!reader

- TW: talk/mentions of abuse, hurt/comfort, mentions of Kyle’s mom

Taglist(Message me if you want to be added/removed!): @mossybank @undeadcortez @americxn @mrgallantt @tatestripedsweater @tatesimper @evanmybeloved @fictional-men-that-i-stan

You're no stranger to waking up in the dead of night. Kyle, no matter how deep he's sleeping, is constantly tossing and turning, usually kicking you at some point in the process and he has a habit of curling up as close as he can to you no matter what position. You didn't mind it though. The fact that he's comfortable enough to sleep with you is good enough for you- for as long as you've known Kyle, he's had trouble with it.

You can tell he has nightmares, which you've learned not to ask too much about since simply bringing it up when he looks tired enough to fall asleep right then and there can ruin the rest of his day- and the last thing you want is to upset him even more.

But- tonight was different. Kyle had gone to bed before you, curling up in bed while you took care of a few things and hopped in the shower, insisting he gets it all warm and cozy for when you came to join him. You tried to be as quick as possible but he was out like a light once you made your way into the bedroom and slipped under the covers with him, falling asleep once he finds his way tucked into your side per usual.

You don't know how long you were in bed before you woke up again, not from any movement or kicks but from a shiver coursing through your body. You groan and try to reach out for Kyle, figuring he had just rolled too far away but your hand hits the frigid cold sheets and you furrow your brows, finally letting your eyes flutter open. Kyle's nowhere to be found, which is odd in itself- you sit up slowly, surveying the room where you find the door, once slightly ajar, flung open.

You sigh as you pull yourself out of bed, grabbing a throw blanket from the end, his favorite, and wrapping it around yourself, shivering once more. Kyle must be freezing- you bite your lip as you round the corner. There aren't many places he could be,, and you're sure he's fine but the sinking feeling in your gut pulls you into the living room.

Kyle isn't set up on the couch or in the kitchen attempting to make a drink- the two places you can usually find him so that doesn't really help the way you're feeling.

You pace around the house until you finally catch sight of the strip of light at the bathroom door, your heart finally settling in your chest, at least somewhat and you shuffle over to the door, rapping your knuckles on the wood as gentle as you can.

"Ky?" You sigh when you get no answer and you try again, only to hear a whimper, muffled, from in the room. You wait a moment before trying to open the door, finding that, thankfully, it's unlocked and you slowly open it to peek your head in.

Kyle's pushed himself as far into the corner of the bathroom as he possibly can and is curled up into himself, having brought his knees up to his chest to wrap his arms around and rest against. You enter the room and approach him, noting the way he tenses up and shakes when you do.

Kneeling down in front of him, you hesitate before reaching out, fingers meeting Kyle's soft curls as his body wracks with sobs, attempting to soothe him before he can work himself up any worse than he is.

"Kyle, baby- can I move closer to you,,?" When you get no answer you let your hand slip away from his hair but Kyles's head snaps up before you can move too far, his hands finding your wrist to bring it back. He leans into your hand and your heart drops at the sight of him.

Your eyes meet Kyles, his usual sweet doe eyes now panic-stricken and filled with tears, threatening to spill out onto his cheeks once more. They finally do when he opens his mouth, his eyes squeezing shut as he tries to force out words, voice wobbling.

“N-no! Please don’t,, don’t leave!” A litany of pleas escape his lips and he shakes his head rapidly, scrambling up on his knees as his tears come back at full force. You frown and bring up your other hand to cup Kyles's face, wiping away his tears. The hand on your wrist gently squeezes as he continues, trying to push back his tears, “Please, (Y/N)- I-I’m gonna stop I p-promise n’ we c-can go to bed just- just please don’t leave me,, what if she-“

Kyle cuts himself off, harshly biting down on his lip and you shush him softly, bringing him closer to you until he's practically in your lap. He's shaking worse than you've ever seen, probably due to panicking and the fact that he's freezing. You slip the blanket you have around his trembling form and pull him flush against your body. Kyle practically melts against you, burrowing his face into your shoulder and you hear him take a shuddery breath as he tries to calm down.

"I'm not going anywhere sunshine,, as long as you want me here, okay?" You hum, smoothing Kyle's hair out of his face so you can peer down at him, and he nods, furrowing his eyebrows. Once he somewhat settles down, you continue on, "Kyle,, I- what brought this on? We need to talk about this."

You watch as his eyes open, looking up at you as a whine of protest emits from his throat, and you have to reassure him quickly when he begins tearing up again. He sniffs and brings his hand up to rub at his eyes.

"No,, p-please- just,, just a nightmare." You sigh as you listen to Kyle, and while you know how exhausting it must be, you both need to talk about it at some point- you can't just let it go on like this.

"Maybe- but this has been going on for a while Ky,, and it's obviously getting worse,," You say, shifting on the cold tiles of the floor to sit back against the tub, allowing you to hold Kyle easier and he takes his place in your arms once more, shoving his face into your shoulder with an impatient huff, "Talk to me."

"J-Just,, t-they just feel so real,, I- I know they aren't n' that I don't have to worry anymore b-but,, it's just a-always at the back of my mind. Her h-hands, h-her touch just- it's all I can f-feel sometimes." Kyle takes in a sharp breath, continuing, "I haven't seen my mom i-in years and,, she still controls me."

You falter at Kyle's words, staring up at the ceiling as you process them, and try not to let your emotions get the best of you as you before you start talking, wracking your brain for an answer.

You've always wondered why he never talked about his family or about the discomfort surrounding the topic but you never asked- never prodded- much like with these nightmares. You figured that everyone has their own family issues, but you never thought that it would be something like this. The thought of the sweet boy tucked against you ever going through something like that- it made you see red.

Finally snapping out of your thoughts, you glance back down at Kyle, who's finally turned his attention to the hem of the blanket around his shoulders, knawing at his bottom lip as he tries to suppress his tears. You bring the blanket tighter around his shoulders, running your free hand across the curve of his back.

"A-and,, I dunno, I just- You already d-deal with so much and y-you're so patient with m-me already,, I don't w-want to burden you anymore w-with this,,"

You furrow your brows, shaking your head and bringing his chin up to look you in the eyes.

"Kyle- if you think you're burdening me with this, that's far from the truth,, it isn't good to bottle stuff up like that. I'm so sorry baby- " You hum, taking a deep breath before continuing, "But hey,, you are safe, okay? I'm not going to let a single thing happen to you again,,"

Kyle nods, and your heartaches at how exhausted he looks, bringing him close to press a chaste kiss to his red nose, prompting a small smile to pull at his lips. He leans in and rests his forehead against your own, eyes drifting closed as he sniffles, rubbing his nose gently.

"Can we- can we talk about t-this later,,? T-tomorrow, I promise, just- I'm tired (Y/N),,"

You hum in agreement, planting one last kiss on his forehead before pulling yourself up, offering your hands to Kyle to help him, which he instantly accepts. You both make your way out and into the bedroom and your eyes flicker over to the clock- 4 am. You were definitely taking off of work tomorrow.

Kyle makes his way over to the bed, dramatically throwing himself onto it, splaying his arms out. You grin and clamber onto the bed next to him, pulling the covers over your legs and once you're settled in, he curls up next to you. You end up turning on a movie (Back to the Future, Kyle insisted on it and you didn't have the heart to tell him otherwise) and he eventually falls asleep safe and tucked into your arms. This time, thankfully, throughout the whole night, no nightmares to be had.

#byeeee #kyle spencer #evan peters #tate langdon #kit walker #james patrick march #kai anderson #ahs #evan peters imagine

[proship-moodboards]

I don't know these characters, I had to consult the wiki and read about them, so the playlist is based entirely on the vibes I was getting. Despite that, I think it turned out nicely.

#ice scream #shirogane ice scream #idate ice scream #mod zeta #proship #playlist #rapi tw

[metalheadsforblacklivesmatter]

tw // conversion therapy

can you share this with your followers if you haven't heard of it already, the new zealand government put out a public submission form for input on whether or not they should ban c/nversion th/rapy, so it's super important they get flooded with submissions telling them to ban it, it's time sensitive too, and you don't have to live in NZ to make a submission

https://www.parliament.nz/en/ECommitteeSubmission/53SCJU_SCF_BILL_113397/CreateSubmission

Damn. New Zealand, I had such high hopes for you. I'm severely disappointed in you. 😥

-fae

[daenerysrey]

since it’s seems confusing for a lot of people let me do this for yall! so a morally grey character means bad but not completely bad an anti hero

Anti Hero:

Loki!

Irredeemable purely evil villain who deserved only one ending always which is painful death!

VILLAIN

tw: jumpscare ugly old white men groomers, abusers, tyrants, pedophili*, manipulators spacenatz* rapis* enslavers mindrapist* murderers sex traffickers and torturers!

Homelander

#magneto #helmut zemo #the darkling #kylo ren #ben solo #damon salvatore #klaus mikaelson #erik lensherr #eric lehnsherr #star ward #darth vader #wanda maximov #Darco malfoy #omni man #invincible #wandavision #shadow and bone #shadow and bone netflix #general kirigan #aleksander kirigan #marvel #scarlet witch #sab #mcu #ben barnes #adam driver #loki #homelander #the boys #the boys amazon

[arthur-of-camelot]

Into the West

In which Arthur Pendragon takes his final bow and says his goodbyes.

tw: death, blood, emotions ok I got real emo @fallcntrees @geehosaphat  @eilonwy-notjustgirl @labellerose-acheron @truitt-story @marzelsoto @aurora-rosewood @alzcomicbarn @simba-bonfamille-lyons

Goodbye to Belle!

Lay down your sweet and weary head The night is falling, you have come to journey’s end

Arthur Pendragon tw: blood, dying

He knew in his bones that this was it. The feeling was not an unfamiliar one. Once long ago there had been a great battle too. The people were dressed differently, the enemy with swords and not magic, but the outcome felt the same. Innocent people strewn across the room...but Zira was dead. Zira had been defeated, and that at least would do some good for this town.

Arthur let go of his chest for a moment and put his hand over Simba's. "Simba..." he shook his head. He was certain that it would be no use. The wound was too deep and even if they could get someone to come help...there was not nearly enough time. But he did have time for some things. He could speak to his knights, he could thank them for all that they had done....and he could say his goodbyes.

"I...I need you to do something for me," Arthur said after a moment, a small smile spread across his face. "Can you gather up the knights? I..." he sucked in a sharp breath and let it out again. "I don't have much time, but I would like to see them all before...." he squeezed Simba's hand. "Will you do this for me?" 

Belle Acheron

Belle had known that everything was going to go to hell. She had felt it in her bones and it was a comforting feeling, for usually, attacks came without warning. However, what she hadn't expected was Hades collapsing within moments. He was supposed to do this by her side. He wasn't dead, but it was clear that whatever had happened to him was not good, that if they didn't fix it--But they would fix it, because the knights outnumbered the vampires. The Blackwells.This would be their victory.In the meantime, Belle had spent her time trying to help Hades and the others that had been poisoned, jumping from body to body to turn them on their sides and make sure that they were at least breathing before she took a deep breath and tried to start brainstorming. She watched as Zira fell, as her compatriots handled Vitani and Nuka, waiting to jump in if necessary but knowing her mind was better spent trying to find a solution and how could she do anything else when Hades was one of the people she needed to save?

The sound of her name being called had her getting reluctantly to her feet and moving from Hades' side. Most of the danger had passed but now--Belle realized why much of the fighting had stopped as she came upon Arthur--ashen and covered in blood. Her own breath caught in her throat and she hovered a few steps away, unable to force herself closer."Oh, Arthur," she murmured, her hands going to cover her mouth, as if she could press that feeling of dread back inside herself.

Arthur Pendragon Arthur turned his head at the sound of Belle's voice. Good. Belle was one of the more level headed of the bunch. The knights would need that. And he believed he could trust her to do what needed to be done.

"You will no longer need to worry about Zira," Arthur informed her softly, a weak smile stretched across his face. "I feel better knowing my actions today could make up for my uselessness the last time we faced her together." He still felt bad for his failure then, even if there hadn't been much option then.

Arthur gestured for her to come a little closer. "Can you come closer? I...I have two things I want to say to you."

Belle Acheron

tw description of stabbing/anxiety/ptsd Belle didn't want to get closer. She couldn't even look at Arthur's face. Her eyes were fixed on the dagger in Arthur's chest. The mirror wound on her own chest burned and she knew, without knowing how she knew, that--

Arthur would not be getting up and walking out of here.

When Arthur spoke, Belle blinked rapidly to clear her vision and tore her eyes from his wound so that she could look at his face. She clenched her hand into a fist to stop its trembling and moved closer, kneeling down across from Simba.

"You weren't useless, Arthur," Belle told him softly. She reached out and grabbed his hand, giving it a squeeze. The world felt like it was tilting around her, like she might faint, but she just smiled at him. "We made a good team and you succeeded. You beat them."

Arthur Pendragon

Arthur hummed, squeezing Belle's hand back softly, a small smile spread across his face. "It relieves me a little to hear you say so." He sucked in a shaky breath and let it out again. He had to push past those feelings of guilt now. There were more important things to say...about the knights, Excalibur, and Belle. He wanted to thank her. He wanted to thank them all.

"I would like to start by asking you for a favor." Arthur glanced toward Excalibur that rested at his side. "I know you to be.... a... a level headed woman. In fact, of the whole group.... I am certain you would be the most capable of steering everyone right." He sucked in another breath. "Will you hide Excalibur? This weapon in the wrong hands...it could do untold damage."

Arthur knew that something as legendary as the sword was difficult to send away. The temptation to keep something so useful would be there. But he firmly believed Belle would do the right thing.

Belle Acheron

Belle was still trying to push away at her instincts that wanted to run from Arthur and his wounds. The very same ones she had had, once upon a time. Those fatal wounds. She could remember, looking at him, how cold it had been. How terrible it had been to die alone on the floor of the bookshoppe--

Except, Arthur wasn't alone. He was surrounded by people who loved him. Who looked up to him. Belle knew that it was gentler to go that way. And as much as she wanted to use whatever nonexistent power as the Queen of the Underworld, there was nothing she could do except let a dying man tell her what he wished.

Her eyes strayed to the sword at his side as he mentioned it and it was Bedivere who appeared for just a moment. This scene having played out once before, thousands of years ago. Then, Bedivere had hesitated, had wondered at Excalibur's great power and if it was not better used...and Belle wondered...would she make the same mistake? Would she be strong enough to let got of a weapon that might protect her family in the future?

"Of course, Your Highness," she told him, keeping her voice from wavering, though she did not know how. "I won't let it fall into the wrong hands again, I swear to you."

Arthur Pendragon

A small smile spread across Arthur's face. He could rest easier knowing that he had asked this of Belle. While the temptation would always be there...he was sure that she would do the right thing.

"I know you won't. I have faith in you. You'll do what needs to be done." Arthur had always known that Belle would do so. She did everything that she could. She had done so while pregnant, she would certainly do it now. Sometimes it felt like there was nothing the woman couldn't do if she set her mind to it.

Arthur took a breath and let it out again. "I want to say how... how proud I am to have been able to...to work with you and get to know you." Arthur knew that they could contribute a good deal of success to her wisdom. "I figure...someone with your wisdom should...should be given a gift worthy of you..." @Sir Kay/Bedivere

Belle Acheron

Doing what needed to be done felt almost as if it was becoming a burden, rather than an honor. The more that she did, the harder it felt like it became. She wondered if there would ever be a time that someone would ask something of her and she would not be able to do it. Or would refuse.

But that was the thing about Belle, she didn't think she could ever refuse. To do so felt like...denying who she was. Which was someone who always wanted to help.

Even now, amongst the chaos, she managed a small blush when Arthur told her he was proud. Not many people said that to her, and she would cherish the fact that King bloody Arthur had said it to her. Had meant it too.

"You don't have to give me anything," Belle told him. "Being your friend, learning from you. That's all I could ever want." 

Arthur Pendragon

It was funny really, that Belle had mentioned learning. He had the kind of knowledge that no historian would have. And he would do what he could to impart some on her. He was certain that this would be more valuable than a trinket.

"Well... I can make no promises as to... to what you'll find, but... I thought my gift to you would be the... the location of Camelot." Arthur managed a small smile. "Or at least...what might be left of it. There were... many hidden tunnels and...and underground dungeons and things...they could still be there..." Arthur sucked in a shaky breath and let it out again.

"As I said, I cannot guarantee it to be a very...fruitful gift...but it may at least be something engaging." 

Belle Acheron

Belle's eyes widened and her grip on Arthur's hand tightened. She couldn't even feel her excitement, because she knew that she would rather had Arthur live than Camelot. A hundred times over she would choose him over Camelot. As queen of the Underworld she knew a thing or two about chasing ghosts and how painful it could be.

"I--" Belle breathed, her lip trembling, but she let go of his hand with one of hers and reached it into her pocket, drawing out her phone. It took her several times to unlock it as blood--hers? Hades'? Arthur's?--smeared across the screen and her hands trembled. She had to keep blinking tears out of her eyes as well, but she managed and set it on her lap between them after having turned on the voice memos.

"If...if you're sure. I will make sure that the knowledge I find is only used for the benefit of others. I promise." She lifted Arthur's hand and kissed the back of it. "Is there anything I can do for you? To--to make you more comfortable?"

I know what it's like, Belle wanted to say. Tell me what you need.

Arthur Pendragon

"I know. You're one of the only people I think.... that I think would actually use such knowledge for good." Arthur knew plenty of people who couldn't help but want to use what they found for their own benefit. Belle had never seemed like that type,

It was why he felt like she could handle what he offered. "I know...but it's what I have to give...and I wish to give it to you." 

Belle Acheron

Belle’s eyes filled with tears, but she did her best to hold them in, pressing her lips together as she nodded. “Alright, tell me then.”

She let Arthur murmur the coordinates. Could hear his breath coming harder and shorter as he spoke and she rubbed her thumb gently over the back of his hand.

“Thank you,” Belle told him once he’d finished. “For this. For your friendship. Know that you are going somewhere gentle. A place for heroes and the best of people.” Belle had always felt that as the Underworld’s queen, she didn’t have any power, but at the very least, she could be sure about death.

“You have no unfinished business, rest easy, Your Highness.” She leaned over and kissed his forehead lightly.

Goodbye to Tiana!

Sleep now And dream of the ones who came before

Tiana Truitt

tw blood

Tiana rushed in. Her ankle still felt a little off, but she didn't care. She had heard shouting coming from this room, and when she saw the scene, a strangled kind of scream came from somewhere Tiana didn't recognize. She didn't even notice Zira. Just Arthur, bleeding on the ground, Simba knelt beside him. "Arthur!" Tiana gasped, dropping to the floor next to him and not even noticing all the blood she was getting on her suit.

He looked like he was in bad shape. Very bad shape. But he wasn't-- he couldn't-- the Knights were going to win! They had outsmarted the Blackwells, they had saved the day-- Arthur was going to live. He had to. It was just a little wound, wasn't it? Surely people had suffered worse.

"Arthur, we need to get you out of here!" She looked around, tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. "Somebody! Do something!" 

Arthur Pendragon

tw blood

Arthur was grateful that Simba had done what he asked. He had looked reluctant, like maybe he did still think there was something that could be done. He understood that. He'd seen it on the faces of many of his friends, his knights before with each loss they'd dealt with.

"Tiana..." Arthur said softly, a blood covered hand reaching out for her own. "Tiana it's okay. There's nothing that can be done here." He knew that his time here was unnatural anyway. He had been tasked here for the purpose of protecting the town from evil, from Zira...and he had done his best and taken out the monster. He could die peacefully knowing that he had accomplished something.

"Well...there is one thing..." He glanced up at Tiana and smiled slightly. "This may be very old fashioned, but will you allow me to give you a blessing of sorts?"

Tiana Truitt

Terror seized Tiana and she shook her head, a sob escaping from somewhere deep inside her. She didn’t like to cry in front of people. Never had. But she couldn’t help it. This wasn’t how the story was supposed to go. Gareth was supposed to die while working with Arthur, not the other way around. Even the rational part of her that told her there was nothing that could be done for him, that a dagger to the chest meant a certain fate, was drowned out by the alarm bells in Tiana’s head.

And then she saw the smile on Arthur’s face. He had always been so wise, so strong. It was why Tiana had always wanted to do right by him. It was more than just the inner Knight telling her that Arthur was her commander, it was his reassuring eyes, his steady wisdom. The scenes flashed before Tiana— training together with the swords he had gifted the team, Arthur’s calm advice. His encouraging words when Tiana ventured out onto the roof of the church, and how she never feared falling with the line of rope in his hands. Laughing together, playing Dungeons and Dragons while the rest of the team ventured into the unknown. And now, Arthur asking to do one final thing for Tiana.

And suddenly, Tiana understood. She didn’t want to, but she did.

“Go ahead. Please,” Tiana said, nodding and not even bothering to try and stop her tears anymore. She had never been very religious, but she found comfort in ritual. If it was what Arthur wanted, then Tiana wanted it. To the end, she was his Knight.

Arthur Pendragon

Arthur let out a relieved breath, taking her hand and squeezing it gently. "Tiana...you are one of the...bravest people I know. It's been such an honor to...to get to know you...and to know your incredible cooking skills," he said with a small laugh, wincing a little as he did.

"I know that your future will be a good one. You will walk on the highway of greatness. Instead of curses, you shall be greatly blessed. Your little efforts will yield great results and your mouth shall always be filled with songs of victory. I hope that you live the life of joy that you deserve. Don't let anyone make you feel as if you can't do something...you've proven a thousand times over that you can."

Arthur was immensely proud of her, as he was of all of his knights. "And...it's a small thing really, but...there's an old globe in my..my apartment that I'd like you to have. To...to always remember that you have a whole world of opportunity out there."

Tiana Truitt

Tiana tried not to let her fear and grief take over. She tried to focus on Arthur’s words, burn them into her memory. She knew what was happening, even if she didn’t want to accept it. And Tiana never wanted to forget this, ever.

She nodded as Arthur spoke, committing each word to memory. Arthur believed in her. And she wasn’t going to let him down. It seemed to be how Tiana grieved: she committed herself to a legacy.

“Thank you,” Tiana said, her tears slowing now. “I’m going to make you proud, Arthur. I promise. I’m never going to let anything happen to this town. To these people. You did your part and now it’s time for me to do mine.” She mustered a small smile. “Swynlake will be safe. We’ll never forget you.”

Arthur Pendragon

"You have already made me prouder than words can express," Arthur replied warmly. "You already do make me so proud." There was no need for her to work harder than she already had. Arthur knew that she had done amazing and would continue to do so.

"I will never forget you either. I'm certain...certain that I'll look down on you all and will be in awe of all that you guys accomplish without me." He squeezed her hand gently. "Thank you for helping me with everything. Truly...it's been an honor."

Tiana Truitt

There was always more to do. Tiana was sure of that. But the words still hit Tiana, somewhere deep she didn’t go often.

She didn’t know what to say. There weren’t really any words for what she was feeling. So she just nodded. “It’s been an honor for me as well,” she said in a low, choked voice. She glanced over her shoulder. The rest of the knights had arrived. “Goodbye, Arthur. Thank you.” Tiana squeezed his hand and nodded at the person behind her, then took one last long look at the king. She would never forget.

Goodbye to Eilonwy!

They are calling From across the distant shore

Eilonwy Llyr

TW: Blood

Turning away from the fallen Vitani, Eilonwy cradled her injured arm against her body and ignored the blood dripping down her sword. It was done. Not good enough, not fast enough, there were far too many injured that she needed to find a way to help, but the pain fogged her mind slightly as the initial rush of adrenaline began to fade.

That was, until she walked closer and saw the expression in Simba's eyes where he stood next to Arthur. On the ground. Covered in more blood than any person had the right to be.

She ran over and knelt next to him sword clattering to the ground as she felt the way her heart pounded in her chest. The words tumbled out across from each other, speeding up as if she could feel the way she was running out of time before she could consciously think it, "I'm sorry. I should have been with you, I should have been faster, I'm sorry. Please don't go."

Arthur Pendragon

"Eilonwy...." He reached out for one of her hands, squeezing it lightly to try and ground her a little. Even as his chest ached and he struggled for breath, he wanted to be of comfort to her. It had only been a dream, but he still felt as if, in some small way, she was a daughter to him.

"You have done nothing wrong. You don't need to apologize for anything. You've been brilliant." Arthur smiled at her, rubbing his thumb over her hand. "You are such a talented young woman. It is...I'm only sorry I won't be able to see how much more you'll grow and accomplish."

Eilonwy Llyr

As he took her good hand, she squeezed his in return, clinging desperately. He'd been her father in her first ever Swynlake dream, and in nearly every way that made him the first father she'd ever known.

She'd lived her whole life with the knowledge of her own parents death. That loss had always defined her, and she thought she'd come to terms with it. She hadn't known that there was more she could lose after all.

"Tod and I, we stopped Vitani. We'll make sure everyone's ok. You don't have to worry about anything." She wasn't sure if it was Brunor inside her or her own feelings that had her brushing her lips against his hand, pledging fealty as they had in another life. She didn't even notice the first tear begin to roll down her cheek as she did so. 

Arthur Pendragon

"You did?" Arthur asked, his smile only widening. Despite his pain, he knew that he had found a great group of people. They fought hard, and they had done so much to try to protect this place. Just as Arthur had done everything in his power to do so.

"How could I worry with such brilliant knights?" Arthur added, still gripping gently onto Eilonwy's hand. "I only really wish to... to offer you something for the future. Not much...but at least... something. Will you accept a blessing?" 

Eilonwy Llyr

"Of course." She didn't even have to think as she agreed. During the nightmare fog, she had given a blessing of her own to a friend she hadn't realized would become as important as he did. It felt like the closing of a circle to receive one now. She wasn't a healer. She wasn't someone powerful enough to keep him here. And for all she was a knight, there was a part of her that was still the little girl who didn't know what home was and who had never gotten to say goodbye to anyone. She wouldn't waste it now.

Arthur Pendragon

Arthur smiled, reaching for her hand to squeeze it gently. "I hope... that you continue to grow and prosper and... and shine the way that I know you can. You are... an incredibly capable young woman and I hope that you.... you get everything you desire." He sucked in a breath and let it out again. "I wish I could see you continue to succeed."

Eilonwy Llyr

Eilonwy let out a short sob before pressing her lips together again and nodding, trying to take in the words he was saying. Although she knew she would never forget them. How could she? For all the times people had vanished, this was her first ever goodbye. "I'll try. I will. Is there anything you want? Something I can do? Anything you ask, I'll do."

Arthur Pendragon

"I want you to continue to...to do what you can to protect the people of this town." He took a breath and let it out again. "And...I'd like you to accept a small gift...if you will." He debated over what would be the most useful to her. What she would value the most. "In...in my apartment I should have a...a journal somewhere of...of different fighting tactics and...and I wrote down some possible scenarios that...that you could try with incorporating your magic and...and the sword. I know I'm not a magick myself...but I hope it will be helpful to you."

Eilonwy Llyr

Eilonwy had spent the last few years with the knowledge that she was supposed to be Queen one day. But she had never seen what that had looked like for herself, so she didn't know what it was supposed to be. Instead, she knew that when she thought of what it meant to be a royal, she would think of this and think of him.

Even now, she didn't feel comfortable sharing that secret where so many could hear, as it wasn't hers to share. She hoped he would understand. But she could take his promise and inscribe it on her heart. "I will. I promise." For as long as she lived.

The gift had several more tears spilling down her cheeks as she nodded. "I'll treasure it forever. Thank you. Hyd nes y byddwn yn cwrdd eto bydd y duwiau yn eich dal yng nghledr eu llaw."

Goodbye to Aurora!

Why do you weep? What are those tears upon your face? Soon you will see all of your fears will pass away

Aurora Rosewood

Aurora still felt sick to her stomach, both from her magic use and participating in the death of Nuka. But everyone was okay so it was worth it. She had seen Nuka look toward Zira and Arthur and lose control when Zira had died but Aurora's focus had shifted to control Nuka and protect Tiana and Marzel. She hadn't even noticed Arthur on the ground until she was checking that everyone was okay, until it was Simba's voice that signaled anything was wrong.

Then the sickness in her stomach got worse.

He wasn't supposed to die, perhaps she could still help? She had a number of herbs and she could do something. Stumbling over to Arthur sitting at his side trying to assess the wound. They could still fix this couldn't they? But Aurora did know. it was useless it hung in the air.

"I'm sorry," Aurora whispered, tears already starting to slip down her cheeks. She should have helped but if she had- then would Tiana and Marzel be okay? "I'm so sorry."

Arthur Pendragon

Arthur smiled at Aurora. "You have nothing to be sorry for. You are beyond anything I could have imagined." For it was true, he had had some doubts at the beginning. His memories of Lancelot felt a lot more fresh than they actually ought to be. He couldn't help the concern that he had felt.

But Aurora was a breath of fresh air. She did her best, and she was a pacifist at heart. "I am the one who should apologize to you." He took a breath and let it out again. "You...who are so... you who wanted nothing to do with fighting and...and were a peaceful person... I threw you into this. For that I beg your forgiveness." 

Aurora Rosewood

Aurora shook her head, for how sick to her stomach she was that she had helped in the battle she would do it again if it meant the others were safe. No one ever deserved death but these Blackwell's were meant to be dead long ago. Life had meant to move on without them.

"There is nothing to forgive, you fight for those that you can not lose." Looking around briefly Aurora smiled at their group of people. "Please rest your heart of any guilt you have of me. And please know, my legacy with Lancelot might not be one of pride but it will be from now on."

Arthur Pendragon

He let out a relieved breath. He did feel at least somewhat like he could forgive himself if Aurora could forgive him. Arthur felt like there was still so much he hadn't done and wished he could do...but he had done what he had set out to do. He had stopped Zira. He could die in peace knowing he had managed that much.

"Thank you Aurora. You are beyond who Lancelot was. You... you are your own person and... and it is an honor to know you." He forced another quick breath. "I have... I have a blessing and a gift for you. I hope that you will know peace from here on out. I will look down from the stars and know that there goes one of the kindest souls out there."

Arthur managed a small smile. "You are your own person...and with that in mind... I have an old mirror somewhere in my apartment...the frame looks to be of gold....it's useful but it also... whenever you feel doubt or...or worry... look there and see the powerful, beautiful, good knight that I know you to be."

Aurora Rosewood

Tears dripped down Aurora's cheeks faster than she could even attempt to stop them but there was a point she didn't want to. Grief wasn't something to be hidden, this life had been cut too short and Aurora had been unable to do her duty as a knight and protect him. In both Lancelot's life she had failed and could only make the promised to move forward with strength she didn't have before. A resolve for her kindness, a nod to her king that believed in her.

Leaning down Aurora placed a kiss to Arthur's forehead.

"May you know rest among the stars and know we are safe here because of you." Aurora whispered. "It was my honor to know you, To follow your lead once more."

Goodbye to Tod!

What can you see on the horizon? Why do the white gulls call?

Tod Sionnach

TW: blood, ptsd

Tod was in a daze. He could hear the screams, the cries, the panic, but it was as if he were underwater. He was staring down at the body of Vitani and it would flicker from his foe’s body to his grandmother’s body, back and forth, over and over again. He had taken everything from her and everything she would have. Even if she was the enemy, he felt broken by this.

At the calls of Arthur’s name from the others, he folded the woman’s arms over her chest and stumbled away, finding himself in a much more difficult and violent situation.

The knights were all around a dying Arthur and he had blood splattered all over him. What was he supposed to do? What was he supposed to say to someone he looked up to so much? He fell to his knees, leaving his sword beside him.

“Arthur I—“ he was breathing heavily, the tears heavy in his eyes. “Arthur, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what I’ve done. Vitani’s gone I just— What did she do to you? I wasn’t strong enough to help you. I— I’m sorry.” In his eyes, somehow, this was all his fault. He trapped his leader in his unlucky mess. “Don’t go.”

Arthur Pendragon

Arthur glanced over at the boy, shaking his head a little. His head spun a little bit, but he would ignore it. He only had so much time left to care about these minor discomforts. It was alright. He just needed to say his piece.

"You have nothing to apologize for Tod." He managed a small smile. "You defeated Vitani? That's incredible. I always knew you would be able to do whatever you set your mind to. You're...you're a very capable young man." 

Tod Sionnach

Tod shook his head. He was just so clouded with guilt and worry over someone that had meant so much to all of them. What would they ever do without him?

“I laid the final blow, Eilonwy did so much more,” he said, still staring down at his bloodied hands. He didn’t feel capable. He wished he could be so much better. “How— How do I get over taking someone’s life? I know she did awful things but I… I took everything from her.”

Arthur Pendragon

"Hey, you did a great deal." Arthur would not let one of his knights think they were anything other than great for doing what they could.

He reached for one of Tod's hands and squeezed it gently. "You remember what that person would have done if you hadn't. Remind yourself of all the people that will be safe because of your actions. How more people in this town will be able to be free and to live in peace... you allowed for that."

Tod Sionnach

When Tod had felt the warmth of Arthur’s hands, he felt the first tears of many fall down his cheeks. He considered his words, his advice, much more carefully than anyone.

He never had a father or a father figure, he had just assumed that  this was what it felt like to lose one. Someone you looked up to as a role model. Someone great.

“I’ll remember that. Always. I promise.” There was Melody and her cousins that he hoped were safe. Perhaps because of him. “Thank you, Arthur… Is there anything I can do for you? Anything at all? Please.”

Arthur Pendragon

Arthur hummed, debating over what he could say. "Stay safe. I wish... for you to live a happy life." He smiled at Tod softly. "I also... well I have a gift for you. I thought maybe... well I had a feeling something..." he just felt that his days had to be numbered. He was living in a reality that wasn't his own. This was the closest he would get to peace. "There's...a pendant in my study I think... it is something I find quite charming and...I believe it gives a bit of calm...it helps you ease your nerves some."

Tod Sionnach

Tod managed a small smile through his tears and nodded. “I will. I’ll try.” It meant a lot to him. To have someone that cared enough to want that for him. He furrowed his brows, thinking of the gift and where it was. He would never forget it, especially if Arthur wanted him to have it. “I’m honored that you want to give something like that to me. Thank you.” He gave the other man’s hand a squeeze. It felt like he was growing colder or perhaps that was just his mind. Either way, Tod hated it.

“I wanted to tell you thank you. For the life you’ve lived and the good you’ve done. If there was ever a man I’d want people to remember me like… I believe that man would be you, sir.” He sniffled then, shaking his head. “It’s hard to let go. You’ve changed so many of our lives and I will never squander that. I’ll keep getting stronger, I— I promise.”

Arthur Pendragon

Arthur smiled softly at Tod, squeezing his hand again in return. He was sure that Tod was ready. He would grow into even more of an incredible person without Arthur there guiding him.

"Take care of yourself Tod. You are an incredible...truly incredible person. You will do wonderful things."

Goodbye to Al!

Across the sea A pale moon rises The ships have come to carry you home

Al McWiggin

His King was down --

Everything was a blur. Everyone surrounded Arthur, reaching out to him, as he said his last blessings. Al had never actually seen someone die. And he'd never had someone who was actually, well, important to him die.

Arthur had given him a purpose. Arthur had reignited his love for Swynlake and made him feel like a hero for the first time in his life. Like a real, true bonafide hero in all the books he read and all the movies he watched and all the games he played.

"My King," said Al, getting down on one knee and grasping Arthur's hand. "Don't go where I can't follow." He felt tears sting his eyes and he knew those words were meaningless; Arthur would pass on. Arthur would be at peace, at last. 

Arthur Pendragon

Arthur squeezed Al's hand gently. He could recall where those words were from. He was fairly certain. Al had shared a great deal of movie trivia and games and things, but Arthur did recall the epics that he had taken a lot of meaning from.

"Do not weep for me Al. I know that I will move on to a more peaceful place....perhaps it will be like it is in that story of yours. White shores...and a far green country as far as the...the eye can see." He smiled at Al. "I did recall your movies a little you know. I have to say, you've shown me so much... I wish to thank you for...for all that you've given me."

Al McWiggin

Okay -- he was definitely ugly crying now. Arthur remembered the movies. He remembered the movies!

"You've inspired me to be a better man," said Al, sniffling through his tears. "I won't stop you from going... but I want you to know that before you do."

Arthur Pendragon

"That...I'm honored Al." Arthur replied softly, a small smile still spread across his face. "You've made me want to know more about this time. It was a joy...it really was a joy to learn from you." Arthur forced a breath in and let it out again. "I...I have something for you...if you'll accept it."

Al McWiggin

Al certainly didn't have King Arthur telling him that learning from him was a joy on his Swynlake bingo card, but it was enough to make him blink away tears.

"Of course," said Al, bowing his head. "It would be an honor."

Arthur Pendragon

"I tried my hardest to learn about your...movies. I thought I might give everyone...for Christmas..." he took a moment to breathe and try to refocus on what he was saying to Al. He only had so much time. "Anyway...I...I hid a sword in my closet...it's not. It's one of the...the one that glows..."

Goodbye to Martin and Archimedes!

Don't say We have come now to the end White shores are calling You and I will meet again

Martin Ambrosius

Martin felt as though his heart had been struck by an icicle as he stared at Arthur. Medes abandoned his usual perch on the mundus' shoulder to fly to Arthur's side which prompted him to also approach slowly.

Martin could hear his father's voice in the back of his mind hiss that they had failed, that he had failed, and he almost couldn't find the words to say.

"I'm sorry," he murmured, some distance still kept between himself and the king.

"You deserved better, old friend," Archimedes added.

Arthur Pendragon

Arthur reached out to place a gentle hand on Archimedes' head. "It's alright. I did what I set out to do." And he would be able to rejoin his love...Guinevere would be waiting for him.

"Thank you for all your help my friends."

Martin Ambrosius

Medes leaned into Arthur's touch, tears springing to the familiar's eyes. "I only wish that there was more we could have done, more time. I'm not ready to mourn you again, not yet."

Martin ducked his head, feeling the weight of a legacy so old and also the grief of his own washing over him. "You were a great leader, you taught everyone here so much. You won't be forgotten. I'm... I'm sorry. I understand why my family has remembered your name with so much reverence."

Arthur Pendragon

"Don't be sorry. I know that this was what I was meant to do. This....I will return to those I lost long ago." He smiled weakly at Archimedes and Martin. "I would hope that...that the two of you would be able to prosper for years to come."

Goodbye to Simba!

And all will turn to silver glass A light on the water Grey ships pass Into the West

Arthur Pendragon

He had said nearly all that he could say, and he knew it was coming toward the end. There was just one more person he wanted to speak to before he passed on. And that was Simba. Simba who had become a good friend, and who shared memories of his brother.

Arthur turned his head toward Simba. "I'm sorry for the burden I'm placing on you...but would you stay with me in this last moment?

Simba Bonfamille-Lyons

Simba had sat with Arthur, not really paying attention to what he was saying to the others. He oscillated between praying to Allah (though, he had a feeling Allah had turned away from this place) and blinking into Kay's memories, the edges of the ballroom blurred. Sometimes they were on the battlefield, sometimes they were sitting on cool marble. He kept his hand over Arthur's wound the whole time, uselessly applying what pressure he could with his injured arm.

When Arthur finally turned towards him, Simba sniffled, blinking the tears out of his eyes. Some of them fell on Arthur's golden suit.

"Of course," Simba said, adjusting Arthur a bit, so that he was better enclosed in his arms. "I-I don't know what to do." His bottom lip trembled.

Arthur Pendragon

It was getting harder to stay conscious, and his breathing was becoming sharper and more painful. He knew soon he would lose the fight with this. But he wanted to...he needed to be able to speak with Simba just a bit longer. Sometimes he still saw himself and Kay growing up, his half brother helping him learn to fight...then he saw them now as they had figured out Zira's plans...worked together.

"Stay with me," he said softly. "I do not have any other family in this world. They're all long gone. You...you still carry my brother's memories. And I like to think...well I think of you as someone very dear to me." He sucked in a shaky breath. "There's not enough gifts in the world to give to one I'm so grateful for."

Simba Bonfamille-Lyons

tw death/mention of car accident Simba had never been with someone when they died.

Well, there had been his grandmother, but he'd been very little and his mama hadn't let him in the room.

There was his dad but--well, Simba didn't remember any of that, his brain addled by drugs. Plus, he'd been knocked unconscious at the moment of impact.

He hadn't realized how helpless he felt. His fingers pressed harder into Arthur's wound, but his blood was already growing cold around his fingers, the flow of it coming slower now. Simba wanted for there to be something he could do. He glanced up at the semi-circle of people around them, looking for anyone who could help. He wanted to shout at them, but they were just as helpless as he was.

Simba looked back down at Arthur, sniffled, and managed to smile at him. "You don't have to give me anything. I'd always wanted a brother, you know. Nothing could be better than that." Simba swallowed roughly. "It's alright. You're alright. A great man once told me that the great kings of the past go to the stars, so that they can watch over the rest of us. So, you're not going too far. We'll all be okay. Don't--don't worry about us." 

Arthur Pendragon

"I know...but I...I wish you could have something...a token. I often..." He gasped and reached for Simba's hand, his whole body trembling for a moment. He didn't have much longer, and though he knew it ought to scare him...he thought that this time it felt vastly more comforting than the last.

"I often wished I had something of those I lost..." Arthur mumbled softly, leaning his weight into Simba. He couldn't even try to lift himself up to look at him like he might want to. "I...I will always worry about you all...but...thank you. It's thanks to you that I...I could make it to this moment."

He gripped his hand a little tighter. "Protect them in my stead. Please. The town...no sheriff either...someone needs to.....you can find the right person for it." 

Simba Bonfamille-Lyons

Simba moved his hand, finally, from Arthur's wound, so that he could grasp his hand. He bit down on his tongue, so that he wouldn't sob. Arthur didn't deserve to be worried in his last moments. He should be peaceful. He had saved them all. Saved Swynlake. It didn't matter, in that moment, what Zira had revealed. What Arthur had done made up for all of that, a hundred fold.

His head bowed as he tried to pull Arthur a little closer, but with his injured hand, there wasn't much he could do.

All he could do was nod. "Of course," Simba said. "I promise. I will--I will do my best."

Arthur Pendragon

He let out a relieved breath, a smile spreading across his face. He was almost ready to go. He had to pass on some of his cares, but this way he could soon be at peace. He could feel himself starting to slip a little.

"I know you will. Whatever....whatever I have that I have yet to give anyone else...it's yours. Thank you for...for being my brother...for letting me have family again..." 

Simba Bonfamille-Lyons

Simba smiled when Arthur did. If Arthur could smile in these moments, when he was no doubt scared and in pain, then Simba could smile too.

"Thank you," Simba repeated. "For being my family too. For--for teaching me that following is just as important as leading. I would've--I would've followed you anywhere."

Arthur Pendragon

tw DEATH

"I know," he replied softly, his breaths coming out more and more shallow. He had prolonged it as long as he could. He'd been granted a new life and experienced a future he never thought he'd see. But this time he felt more sure of what would come next.

He had helped plant the seeds of the garden. The rest of the knights would make sure that everything grew and the town could continue to prosper. Arthur was ready. "Thank you..." Arthur said once more, his eyes drifting shut after a while, head lulling as his grip on Simba's hand relaxed.

One more harsh breath, and then it evened out, and Arthur Pendragon, the Once and Future King was dead, in the arms of one that had known him best.

#tw: death #p: into the west #not tagging everyone in these tags cause #yeah lol #but this was big ow #thank you again everyone for helping me tell arthur's story! #proud of this journey we all took together!!

[illogicallyinclined]

Has hockey au Logan ever had too much caffeine? Has anyone else? How did Joan and Coach Thomas deal with caffeine high players fucking around on the ice during warmup and practice?

college boys,,, dumb. (this ended up being more about caffeine preferences than actual behavior on caffeine, but whatevs, i’m rolling with it)

tws: allusion to vomiting, medication mentions, misUSE of medications because Jared is a clown

okay, so. Logan’s consumed so much caffeine at this point in his life that he has to slam back a six-pack of Monster to feel a Thing -- and yes, he knows that it’s incredibly unhealthy and hypocritical of him, but he’s a college premed, let him live. having said that, he usually starts his day with a cup of coffee courtesy of Remy and throws back a second cup of coffee around 3 PM to make it through the day. without his fix, he’s prone to mild headaches and some irritability, but it’s nothing too serious. as far as “too much caffeine”? yeah, no, there’s no such thing for Logan

caffeine runs the risk of making Virgil Extremely Jittery (“my skeleton is physically vibrating inside of my body right now”), so he tends to avoid consuming copious amounts. he did, however, drink three espressos back-to-back at the hotel after an away game once only to firmly regret it as his stomach revolted and he ended up spending twenty minutes hunched miserably over the toilet

D claims that energy drinks are vile, but you can usually catch him chugging the occasional Red Bull prior to his exams on particularly busy days. moreover, he has a stash of over-the-counter caffeine pills under his bed, but he only cracks those out when he needs to Get Shit Done, never just to wreak havoc

Remus is banned from consuming any sort of caffeine prior to practice because the one (1) time he got a hold of D’s stash of caffeine pills he high-jacked the Zamboni and nearly ran it through the plexiglass

Roman only consumes a ton of caffeine when he needs to pull an all-nighter for an assignment, and the comedown always makes him feel physically ill for a day or two afterwards. that said, you won’t catch him throwing back energy drinks for fun all that often

Remy and Emile will only consume caffeine through tea, coffee, or choice sodas because energy drinks are bitter and gross (Remy) and also terrible for you (Emile); Emile tried caffeine pills once for an assignment but, like Roman, the comedown was legitimately terrible, so he’s abstained from touching them since. whereas Remy -- like Logan -- is so accustomed to caffeine that it has little to no effect on him anymore, Emile’s hands Will Shake if he takes too much at once

Patton prefers sugary coffees over those with a ton of caffeine, and he thinks energy drinks are kind of “icky,” so he mostly gets his caffeine fix through tea if anything, which may make him a little jittery sometimes, but not so much so that he becomes a menace on the ice

OCs

Payton shotguns a Bang in the locker room before each game and crushes the can against his head because he's a horrid ghoul, and although Joan has considered telling him to Knock That Shit Out, nobody really minds the way that Payton zips through warmups like a human ping pong ball, so whatever. (it’s tradition; Joan can respect that well enough)

Jared once mixed Red Bull, caffeine pills, and his anxiety medication together before a practice match and ended up blacking out sometime in the middle frame. don’t get him wrong -- he didn’t collapse or anything, but one minute he was on the bench, the next he was in the locker room with the rest of his team. 0/10, does not recommend.

Alex J tries to avoid caffeinated beverages so that his migraine medication stays effective, so his only source of caffeine tends to be exederin. if he has too much, his introversion does a complete 180 -- nonstop talking and bouncing legs all the way, but nothing too unmanageable 

Callen actually gets paradoxically sleepy if he takes in too much caffeine at once, and his crashes are rapid and legendary 

Myles has and will eat coffee out of the jar if he thinks making it will take too long. Remy is disgusted. Remus is intrigued.

#hockey au #hockey hcs #full cast #medication mention #vomiting tw #emetophobia tw

[biruuuuuuu]

TRAGEDI TAWANGMANGU

Juli ku yang ku planing dengan rapi nyatanyaa masih bercerita tentang sebuah tragedi. Motor yang sudah dipersiapkan, serta mental yang sedari kemaren memang belum rampung dimantapkan.

Jogja-solo pertama yang ku laju dengan santai, yang awalny ku niatkan untuk jogja-magetan ku urungkan karena sedari kemaren jogja lumayan membuat aku lelah. Masih beruntung kiranya diriku. Bayangkan saja bila modal nekat ku jogja-magetan ku kebut sendiri benar terlaksana dan tragedi motor yang meski sudah diservis tapi nyatanya belum ready ku lajukan. Mungkin tragedi tawangmangu akan lebih menguras mentalku.

Ini memang halangan untuk ku karena bahkan sebenarnya tragedi itu juga hampir terjadi di daerah jalan raya metesih-tawangmangu. Tapi masih bisa dikendalikan. Hingga sampailah di TKP aku seketika bleng yang ku ingin hanya aku sudah terduduk dan ingin berdiri. Tapi semua mata yang menatap dan mendekat bilang "mbak duduk dulu, tenangi diri". Kemudian baru ku dituntun ke pinggir, kejadian ada ditempat ramai sehingga aku rasa aku masih penuh dengan lindungan.

"Minum dulu, Apa yang sakit mbak ?" Ku jawab "tidak tahu". Baru selang ku rasa kening sebelah kanan ku sakit dan kepala ku pusing (mungkin efek benturan pada tong pembatas jalan dan luka diakibatkan goresan serpihan helm yang memang aslinya sudah pecah itu). Sekali lagi aku terselamatkan oleh helm. Yaa kalau gk ada helm entah apa rasanya.

Cerita meloncat sedikit sesampai dirumah Bapak bilang ayya dimana-mana banyak yang sayang, gk disini gk waktu dikulonprogo (waktu dirawat). Yaa itu yang ku rasakan semua yang tidak mengenalku mengulurkan tangan begitu ringan mengajak pergi ke dokter, memberi minuman, memberi tempat tinggal, bahkan bersedia mengantarkan pulang.

Sunggu sekali lagi semesta menyelamatkan aku. Dari kejadian ini meski tersisa sakit yang lumayan wkwk tapi aku bersyukur karena ternyata banyak yang menyayangiku dalam bentuk semesta yang lebih luas.

Dear diriku balas kebaikan semesta dengan memberi uluran tangan lebih banyak dan lebih sering.

Tw, 29 juli 2020