#really really helping me out

[modmad]

hey I really hate doing self publicity bUT. FOLKS WE NEED TO MOVE THESE BOOKS or there won't be room in the Topatoco warehouse for TPoH volume 4, which we plan to kickstart later this year- so yeah!

THE PRINCESS AND THE JESTER BOOKS ON SALE NOW!

don't miss the opportunity, there's only a limited number left and they're really gorgeous guys seriously ya gotta get in on this

Want to try before you buy? You can read the Princess and the Jester FOR FREE right here! Go enjoy a free fairy tale! You earned it.

#tpatj #the princess and the jester #sale #books #book sale #they're books! for sale! #help me out and get some really pretty books! #did I mention the books? #mod art #huge shout out to cranky for helping me with the promo images bc I hate doing that. a lot. thanks cranky.

[egophiliac]

IT WAS ERIC AFTER ALL!!!! I'm so glad we got to meet him (before Vil snaps him away with those Infinity Gauntlets) (can't wait to see what happens when we get the matching Infinity Tiara to go with them, there will be no survivors)

(sorry to be so slow/rough lately, just got a lot of stuff on the ol' brain at the moment! alas, if only I could spend all my time drawing incredibly stupid characters I mean I do but)

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #tapis rouge #i know these are not my best but by god i needed to draw ~daddo venue~ #he is a treat! can't wait for him to yell at us for screwing up a shoot or whatever the last-minute disaster will be #i am SO HAPPY it turned out to be about movies after all! ...i mean sort of anyway #i'll take what i can get (and i do enjoy twst trying to be all cute about snow whAHEM i mean beautiful queen) (i see you there twst) #(also to be fair it actually wasn't poisoned in historial-revisionism-twstland so i think we can trust this apple. a+ acting eric) #anyway we are still. very solidly in the 'stand around and talk about the wallpaper for three hours' part of the event. #but HEY we got to meet eric! i was not really expecting it to be him so i am VERY pleased #also god help me i did think the shopping montage as portrayed by a rhythmic where they literally SKIP down the street was hilarious #there's a lot of Choices that were made in this event and that was a good one

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[araneapeixes]

in the bathroom at the gay clubbbb

#a less edited version added for plausible deniability that its not a mirror selfie #bc i know astarion shouldnt be visible in the mirror. but the vision was too strong #anyways on the dancefloor shadowheart is doing those goth girl dances from tiktok #and astarion is doing the fork in the garbage disposal #they dont get any btw bc they get too drunk on tequila and end up throwing up outside and #astarion has to call wyll to pick them up. he does of course #at the same time laezel and karlach are getting into a bar brawl someplace else #and gale is going snork mimimi at home:) #i really like how the shading came out here. adding highlights really helps with 3d shapes #and the way ive shaded shadowhearts torso had me feeling like pygmalion ngl #bg3 #baldurs gate #baldurs gate 3 #shadowheart #astarion #astarion ancunin #bg3 modern au #i NEED to draw shad in more outfits

[uncanny-tranny]

Basically, my philosophy around disability fakers is: I would rather a thousand people fake a disability than have one disabled person suffer without care, aids, compassion, or any help.

#disability #disability advocacy #and there's a difference not many people seem to recognize between faking and realizing you don't have [x] problem... #...such as realizing you don't have [x] disorder because it is instead [y] disorder... #...or you haven't completely understood your care needs/your symptoms/what helps you... #...and some people see ANY change in your understanding of your disability as proof of maliciously faking... #...when i suppose in my personal experience people don't *maliciously* fake disability... #...i'm not saying it could never happen but that i don't think it's the *only* thing motivating people called fakers #i just think (like most everything) this is complex and nuanced because it's a *human* experience #like for me personally i /know/ i still have a lot to learn about my disabilities... #...like... i realized recently that my hands shouldn't be in AGONY when warm water is ran over them when it's SLIGHTLY cold inside or out... #...and i realized that i likely have a Noticable limb difference that needs checking out. does this sound like i'm faking... #...or that maybe i just didn't really explore my own needs and body because of a variety of factors? #i can assure you it is because i haven't really thought before about how i deserved to understand how to best help myself

[zoe-oneesama]

Just curious since i was re reading Scarlet Ladt recently. Did u ever made a doodle of Ivan with a outfit based on his akuma form? Since the episodes where he was akumatized had Scarlet Lady and Chat Noir for the headers instead of him.

Look forward to it if I can ever figure out the logistics of how to sell this series in book form without getting a cease and desist from France.

#yea I'm still trying to get this figured out #doesn't help that taxes really took a chunk out of me so I can't order drafts right now 🙃 #my art #sl art #ivan #ivan bruel #sl fashion

[soosoosoup]

Fluffy rearing

#trolls #dreamworks trolls #trolls poppy #trolls branch #broppy #trolls fanart #why are they rearing moths? #really wanted to put them in fuzzy outfits and couldnt help but think about fluffy moths #for poppy of course the rosy maple moth #for Branch the inspo was based off of the polyphemus moth but did my own spin on the design (haha at this point it's an entirely new kind) #just with the same size and caterpillar form #i took some liberties with both moth desgins tbh though haha #it was fun to design them #was very delighted to find out how the poly is one of the biggest while the rosy is the smallest (silk moth wise) #moths #please let me know if this needs any tw/cw for bugs #Im really sorry for such a long wait #it has been a very long week… #my art <3 #excuse the messiness

[inkskinned]

crows use tools and like to slide down snowy hills. today we saw a goose with a hurt foot who was kept safe by his flock - before taking off, they waited for him to catch up. there are colors only butterflies see. reindeer are matriarchical. cows have best friends and 4 stomachs and like jazz music. i watched a video recently of an octopus making himself a door out of a coconut shell.

i am a little soft, okay. but sometimes i can't talk either. the world is like fractal light to me, and passes through my skin in tendrils. i feel certain small things like a catapult; i skirt around the big things and somehow arrive in crisis without ever realizing i'm in pain.

in 5th grade we read The Curious Incident of the Dog In The Night-time, which is about a young autistic boy. it is how they introduced us to empathy about neurotypes, which was well-timed: around 10 years old was when i started having my life fully ruined by symptoms. people started noticing.

i wonder if birds can tell if another bird is odd. like the phrase odd duck. i have to believe that all odd ducks are still very much loved by the other normal ducks. i have to believe that, or i will cry.

i remember my 5th grade teacher holding the curious incident up, dazzled by the language written by someone who is neurotypical. my teacher said: "sometimes i want to cut open their mind to know exactly how autistics are thinking. it's just so different! they must see the world so strangely!" later, at 22, in my education classes, we were taught to say a person with autism or a person on the spectrum or neurodivergent. i actually personally kind of like person-first language - it implies the other person is trying to protect me from myself. i know they had to teach themselves that pattern of speech, is all, and it shows they're at least trying. and i was a person first, even if i wasn't good at it.

plants learn information. they must encode data somehow, but where would they store it? when you cut open a sapling, you cannot find the how they think - if they "think" at all. they learn, but do not think. i want to paint that process - i think it would be mostly purple and blue.

the book was not about me, it was about a young boy. his life was patterned into a different set of categories. he did not cry about the tag on his shirt. i remember reading it and saying to myself: i am wrong, and broken, but it isn't in this way. something else is wrong with me instead. later, in that same person-first education class, my teacher would bring up the curious incident and mention that it is now widely panned as being inaccurate and stereotypical. she frowned and said we might not know how a person with autism thinks, but it is unlikely to be expressed in that way. this book was written with the best intentions by a special-ed teacher, but there's some debate as to if somebody who was on the spectrum would be even able to write something like this.

we might not understand it, but crows and ravens have developed their own language. this is also true of whales, dolphins, and many other species. i do not know how a crow thinks, but we do know they can problem solve. (is "thinking" equal to "problem solving"? or is "thinking" data processing? data management?) i do not know how my dog thinks, either, but we "talk" all the same - i know what he is asking for, even if he only asks once.

i am not a dolphin or reindeer or a dog in the nighttime, but i am an odd duck. in the ugly duckling, she grows up and comes home and is beautiful and finds her soulmate. all that ugliness she experienced lives in downy feathers inside of her, staining everything a muted grey. she is beautiful eventually, though, so she is loved. they do not want to cut her open to see how she thinks.

a while ago i got into an argument with a classmate about that weird sia music video about autism. my classmate said she thought it was good to raise awareness. i told her they should have just hired someone else to do it. she said it's not fair to an autistic person to expect them to be able to handle that kind of a thing.

today i saw a goose, and he was limping. i want to be loved like a flock loves a wounded creature: the phrase taken under a wing. which is to say i have always known i am not normal. desperate, mewling - i want to be loved beyond words.

loved beyond thinking.

#spilled ink #writeblr #personal #please don't ask me to talk on my experience on the spectrum lol. i hate how ppl talk to me about it #i really try not to write so specifically about it #bc inevitably someone talks to me like im a child #i think this is the first time i've ever openly identified with it but i've been hinting for years #i might delete this. feels big. #the thing is that being on the spectrum actually IS a spectrum #and if u say ur autistic #inevitably someone makes an assumption about ur needs/symptoms #please do not treat me differently than u usually would. like.... we can tell when you do #and like i mention. i do appreciate the effort. i do truly appreciate the effort. #but it still feels like... #when i was blind. sometimes people kind of did the same-ish thing. #they'd find out i was blind and start talking really loudly? #and while i KNOW they're just trying to help. it would be like. i'd be trying to find #the right way into a building (sometimes only 1 door is unlocked and i couldn't see the signs posted about where to go) #and ppl would be like ''OH UR BLIND? YES SO THIS IS A DOOR. IT OPENS INTO THE BUILDING. IT IS LOCKED NOW." #''A DOOR CAN BE FOUND IN MANY LOCATIONS.'' #and it feels like. when i admit to being autistic #someone comes screeching into my life being like THIS IS A DOOR.

[abd-illustrates]

💛 The Boi 💛

Hello, hope y'all are doing well! (^^)/ Wanted to make a quick post to let y'all know that my annual January curse has breeched containment and I'm currently in the middle of organizing sudden household repairs and unexpected medical appointments and miscellaneous stress sgdfgh-- 🫠 All that to say: no new video this week while I'm stuck grappling with all of the above sgdfksfd -- but here's a doodle of Heartless in the meantime! I wanna figure out a more solid design for his ghouls 🤔👻

#artists on tumblr #abd illustrates #heartless #It always feel wierd to ask this kind of thing - but if any of y'all would like to help the channel out in this trying time #then going back and rewatching some of my old uploads would genuinely be super helpful 🙏💖 #(i say the channel 'cause of how wierd it feels to ask that but rlly it'd be a big help to me fr) #My flat is fully topsy turvy rn and it's been really bonkers trying to get any work done in the midst of sorting out repairs sgfhksdf 🫠 #ANYWAY! i hope yalls tuesdays and week in general are going so good 🫵✨ #and if they're not! i hope they get better real soon

[sofiaruelle]

Commission for the lovely @flowerandthesongstress of our fave triad, Sam, Abigail and Sebastian basking in the afterglow of a very productive band practice.

The Companion piece

#commission #stardew valley #stardew valley ASS gang #stardew valley abigail #stardew valley sam #stardew valley sebastian #sdv abigail #sdv sam #sdv sebastian #sdv abigail x sam x sebastian #very productive indeed #also i would love to thank flowerandthesongstress for letting me have free reign on the commission #and her infinite patience with me as i figure out where all their limbs go #and set the right spicy mood of the final illustration #i had a lot of fun with making it lowkey canon compliant with sams green carpet and wooden floors #the discarded clothes on the floor really helps with the acoustics

[endermagpieart]

What do you mean I’m a bit late for Janus’ big day? Of course not, how could you say such a thing! I definitely didn’t forget all about it in my absence and only get reminded in the incorrect quotes video live chat; that’s not like me at all ;]

Anyways I decided to dress our sassy snake in some different outfits I think he’d like. He seems like the type to get all dolled up on his birthday and it goes with Thomas posting pics in outfits inspired by the sides on their appreciation days!

@thatsthat24

#sanders sides #janus sanders #ts janus #thomas sanders #sanders sides fanart #my hoard #I’ve returned! #the newest asides came out and I remembered how much I love it #so I’m hyperfixated again and I’ve not now peace since #it is nice to actually finish something again tho #I’ve been pretty busy working lately and now I’m starting to pack to move into my first apartment! #so not much time to really sit down and draw #and when I do have time I can’t get the motivation to actually draw anything #I want to get better about posting stuff on here #(even though it feels like I’m just dreaming into the void a lot) #even just silly little things or rough sketches I’ll never finish #I hope it’ll help me continue to draw and make things again #I forgot how nice it is #anyways if you’ve read this far thanks #have a cookie :] 🍪

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Don't Wormy About Me.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #jiang cheng #wei wuxian #yu ziyuan #Please allow me to make it clear how important I think the hug between YZY and JC is in regards to several aspects of their characters #For one - it is the resolution and reveal that behind all the harsh words and bitterness...She really did love her son. #A hug is a soft gesture that you would never expect from someone like YZY and the fact she shows JC this affection now - #-Tells us how she knows that this upcoming battle is a death sentence for her. #Her giving away Zidan is honestly overkill but another sign of her truly showing him how she loves him and wants him to survive. #The dread of knowing she's walking back to a fight without zidian and trying to keep up brave face one last time...chilling. #Zidian represents legacy and promises. And this is going to both save and destroy Jiang Cheng as he carries this weight alone. #Heartbreaking stuff! Didn't draw it in the comic because I wanted to draw a silly worm on a string! #WWX tried to help JC out of the knot but got stuck in it. #Those worm on a string tricks are harder than they look! #Also; it's been about a year since the last boat joke - but indeed this is the 11th boat of pd-mdzs. No need to do the math.

[petscoboba]

I know this AU has since died down, but recently it's really been helping me look on the bright, fun side of college, so I decided to draw @spectacledraws's (go check her out!!!) Deltarune college au as if it were a fake manga (heavily inspired by the Yotsuba comics)!

For those curious what the title means (which I hope I didn't royally mess up the Japanese on):

別の伝説 (betsu no densetsu) - Another Legend

DELTARUNEの二次創作 (Deltarune no nijisousaku) - A DELTARUNE side-story

#deltarune #college au #gaster #asriel dreemurr #chara dreemurr #wooo! finally done! #i'm a bit hesitant to tag sprout #i realize sometimes when people's aus get popular they can sometimes get pressured into only doing that #but i hope it wont be taken that way! i just really. really adore this au #it helps to romanticize the mundane but goofy nature of college #and it helps me calm my nerves juuussstt a little bit for when i move out to finish my degree #anyways! enough rambling about me!! i want to add that i changed azzy's design ever so slightly to match the hidden sprite found in #the deltarune files (i added glasses. i added glasses.) #and i mayhaps made him hold certain things to imply there's something more going on with the golden boy....? #who knows! only he does. hopefully. maybe not.

[arunneronthird]

okay fine i can deal with damian being a weeb but he'll be one on MY TERMS

#boys gonna have TASTE or so GOD HELP ME #if u dont know that manga hes holding is chainsaw man #its REALLY good and i deeply recommend it #in terms of writing its a 10 in terms of emotional damage its ripping ur heart out and spitting on it #damian wayne #robin #batman #dc comics #my art #im such a fucking annoying weeb dude i was gonna put the cover on the right so it showed more but nooooo #my brain went BUT MANGAS ARE THE OTHER WAY AROUND i hate everything #ladies. gentlemen. you have eaten well.

[uncanny-tranny]

Tall trans girl reading this: you aren't too tall for heels. If you want to wear them, wear them proud. There is nothing more spectacular than a tall woman in heels, and nobody can ever take that away from you, not even yourself 🩷🪻

#trans #transgender #lgbt #lgbtq #mtf #nonbinary #trans positivity #honestly my favourite kind of woman is somebody who's told 'arent you too tall for those?' when she wears heels... #...and the next day she shows up in even TALLER heels #sometimes womanhood is a huge 'fuck you' to people who don't get who you are i think #I LOVE YOU WOMEN... 💐💐💐💐🫶 #(also this includes all type of heeled shoe. heeled boots are a great choice to start out ime) #(if you want to practoce wearing heels without Wearing Heels get platform boots imo) #(i think a big reason i can wear actual heels is that i wear heeled platform boots daily) #(and it really helped me get used to how heels feel without the fear of heels that are really thin)

[tradingjack]

From the firmament above, a blood-red eye looks down upon us.

#entered a fugue state at 3am and when i woke up after sleeping 12hrs later i found this on my computer #probably didnt help i was listening to every devil-related soundtrack kensuke ushio has made lmao #vash the stampede #trigun #trimax #listen listen listen. i love me a good ol goofy pathetic loser #but lord. do i also love it so so much when that same loser turns Absolutely Fucking Terrifying #you really fucked around and now you're gonna find out #manga #illustration #artists on tumblr #drawing #my art #comic #fanart #fuck me up el diablo