#religious trauma I guess

[fictivevenus]

When boygenius said: there’s something in the static I think I’ve been having revelations that was so Lazarus rising of them

#supernatural #lazurus rising #dean winchester #castiel #sam winchester #I hate that I typed that #phoebe bridgers #lucy dacus #julien baker #boygenius #I fucking hate supernatural #and I hate that my brain made that connection #anyways #religious trauma I guess

[brainrotlesbian]

Maybe it’s the Christianity-related religious trauma but there’s just something about putting nails through Whumpee’s skin. Anywhere, really. Hands, feet, wrists, shoulders, ribs if you’re feeling brave and don’t fear them dying. Get the rusty ones and really drive them between the bones and tendons and ligaments so it’s even harder to move

#whump #whump thoughts #whump community #how. do I tag this #religious trauma I guess

[hazzabeeforlou]

Coffee theory is wrong, I’ll just say it. Crowley knows only too well that this is in character for his angel. He even knows that there’s no convincing Aziraphale with words, which is why he kisses him. Because that’s all he can do.

That’s all I can do. I agreed to perform at the wedding today without asking denomination details. I usually don’t discriminate. But when they told me there was a dress code, I should have been suspicious. It was as deeply baptist, evangelical, and conservative as it could have been, with an invitation to accept salvation even before the first bridesmaid had walked down the aisle. The message pounded home the subservience of the wife to her husband’s leadership in all things, even hedging the more feminist minded listener with, “The woman could be smarter, more spiritual, more talented, but it is her role to be a support for her husband as he leads the home. You can’t get more sacrificial than that.” I had to sit there as everything I’d heard from birth until my mid twenties regurgitated itself from my trauma trash heap to slap me in the face. Did I feel fury? Yeah, I did. I loathed the men in their formal suits and ties, arms draped over the pews, claiming their domain, the self appointed mouthes of god. But it paled against the rage I felt as I looked at the women, at their pseudo prairie dresses and long hair styled in ways that made me want to shave my own. They had made their choice, though, had served and born children for the bigoted men beside them. What of the bride, the child in a full coverage gown and glasses, who vowed away her agency and future believing it to be love, to be god’s will? What about the bridesmaids and the flower girls who came up to look at my harp, all the girls there that could have been just like little me, vibrant, secretly gay, daring to ask questions, eventually to be kicked out of heaven too?

How can you make them understand that the whole universe is out there? How do you say “run, please,” how do you tell the truth when they think truth is a verb proved by devotion and belief, when they are so sure of being right they can’t even comprehend the possibility they’re wrong?

Crowley spent six thousand years planting little seeds, making small progress, winning battles. But heaven isn’t god, or Metatron, or goodness even, it’s an idea, and an idea can’t let you down, or betray you, not when you create it afresh every morning, and how do you fight that? How do you win a debate with someone’s eternally refurbishing hopes?

The kiss wasn’t an admission or a goodbye or a last ditch attempt to taste what he was losing, it was a kiss to remember because in the end you can’t argue, you can’t convince, you just have to plant yourself in their mind in all your rebellious glory and dare them to forget you. And then you have to walk away. And maybe you cry as you drive home, maybe the check from the gig feels dirty somehow, and maybe you decide to treat your other gay friend to seeing Barbie because you can’t imagine a better fuck you to their money than being used in such a way. Anyways, I dare Aziraphale to forget that kiss, and I dare those girls to forget the noticeably double-hoop-earring gay woman who refused to bow her head in prayer.

#good omens 2 #good omens #religious trauma i guess #barbie movie #it was good by the way #crowley #the kiss

[howlingtothevoid]

Begging God to fix you!

(And other tales about religious trauma)

#web weaving #web weave #on grief #on love #webweaving #childhood grief #oc story: pathdog #Pathdog!Catherina #oc webweave #on religion #religious trauma #tw religious themes #catholic grief #no hate like christian love #happy valentine's day #i guess #queer tragedy

[bitspices]

The thing is Aziraphale is convinced Crowley falling was a mistake in the system. Crowley is good and he's kind and Heaven is supposed to be the good side so it shouldn't have cast him out, that's why he wants to reinstate him as an angel, because what else would he be?

Whereas Crowley understands perfectly that him falling was the system working as intended, Heaven doesn't care about angels being good and kind, it cares about them being obedient and loyal.

And as long as Aziraphale doesn't see that he won't be free from them, because it's inconceivable to him that someone good wouldn't want to be on the good side.

#give me Aziraphale working through his religious trauma in S3 or give me death #good omens meta #I guess #good omens #good omens 2 #good omens 2 spoilers #Aziraphale #Crowley #aziraphale/crowley #ineffable husbands #ineffable spouses #ineffable divorce #otp: we could have been us #queue continuum

[chuuyadelune]

(BSD 113 SPOILERS) the fyodor jesus imagery is driving me insane, so here are a couple of things i noticed from this chapter (all translations from @/nineofscans).

1. fyodor’s position

so the first thing that was most obvious was fyodor’s positioning here. he may not be on a cross, but this is very intentional i would say! he is still in the position of christ on the cross.

2. fyodor’s outfit

i could be reaching, and this is less to do with jesus, but his outfit to me resembles a monk’s habit somewhat—perhaps signifying his position as a man of god.

3. stabbing with spears as the rooster crows

two things are standing out to me here:

first of all, stabbing fyodor with spears as a means of execution is interesting to me considering how jesus also was stabbed by a spears before being taken down from the cross after he gives up his life (following the “my god, my god, why have you forsaken me?” line—which was quoted in the last chapter!)

i cannot remember if jesus is also stabbed before then, but that is the one i remember the most.

the second thing that jumped out to me about this line was the part about the rooster crowing.

in the new testament, when jesus is betrayed by judas, he warns peter that before the cock crows, he (peter) will have betrayed him (jesus) three times.

what are the implications of that? i can’t really say, maybe it has something to do with why bram later gets stabbed with the holy cross sword and why he later works under fukuchi/fyodor. but it felt like an intentional nod to this part of the passion of christ.

4. bram as the devil

this is perhaps another reach, but i’m including it anyways.

before jesus re-enters jerusalem and the events of the passion of christ, he fasts for 40 days in the desert, where he is tempted from the devil (each of the gospels talks about this differently).

but anyway, this does say something. if bram is the devil, and considering all of fyodor’s positioning and religious imagery surrounding him—i feel the jesus references are very intentional. fyodor is deliberately positioned as— if not jesus, then definitely at least a disciple, or a messenger of god, almost supernatural in energy and appearance.

and with all the buddhist references to angels scattered throughout this arc—i think there’s a lot to be unveiled about fyodor yet. we definitely haven’t seen the last of him. but i’m excited to find this all out later!

#bsd #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #bsd 113 #bsd manga spoilers #bsd spoilers #bsd fyodor #fyodor bsd #this barely makes sense help #putting my religious trauma to good use #jem rambles #bsd analysis #i guess?? #lol tagging it anyways #all of this assuming that this is fyodor n not a twin ancestor or smth #you never know! #but at long last… we have some more fyodor information

[scarybellpepper]

Unfinished artwork, but FUCK Travis always breaks my heart :’(

#my art i guess #sally face #sally fanart #sally fisher #sal fisher #sally face fanart #travis x sal #travis phelps #gay travis #religious trauma #digital art #digital sketch

[png-magician]

#collage #religious trauma #i guess #i was at my my Catholic granmothers house yesterday so the gay religious trauma is working two time v she was ranting about the end times

[moss-in-hiding]

You must first be Cast out of Heaven to become the God of a Brave New World

#kira #death note #light yagami #kira death note #death note fanart #fanart #art #painting #Hes so pretty #fun lighting practice i guess #i put so much religious trauma into this one #pretty boy with a god complex #hes definitely a bottom

[oleander-neruim]

I'm not sure about you, but having a crown pressured into your possession by a God making you fight its war just seems like a rather heavy burden.

Inktober Day 16: Angel

Extra thingies under cut, yk how it is

I could go on a very long tirade on my thoughts on Aeor, Exor, & the debilitating affects religion had on Rivendell & its descendents but maybe that's the religious trauma talking idk <3

Totes don't have a parallel post for tomorrow nope notta chance

Coin Flip

#scott smajor #smajor1995 #empires scott #scott major #dangthatsalongname #empires smp #empires season 1 #aeor #champion of aeor #religious trauma coded scott anyone? #whod guess #look i finished scotts s1 pov and haven't been the same since #inktober #inktober 2023 #inktober day 16 #inktober day 16 angel #ollie's art #❄️

[andthebeanstalk]

PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS

PUSSY.

BIG FLAPPY WET JESUS PUSSY.

JESUS' SOPPING WET PUSS-PUSS

[Edited months after posting to discourage catholics from replying to this post after finding that both the nice and much funnier not-nice responses to this were equally bad for my mental health. I didn't wanna delete it bc I was quite proud of some of my responses and it helps to have a visual reminder of why I left an abusive organization. Also, this means that any catholic who has reblogged this in an attempt to convert me, has now reblogged a post that, if clicked, links back to this. Use MY post for propaganda, will you!]

Thinking about how it was never made clear to me in Catholic school exactly WHY Jesus died for our sins. I just remembered that I was literally never clear on who the dying helped??

I've heard theories as an adult, but basically what I'm saying is pointless martyrdom seems a little pointless, and also with enough propaganda the big logical gaps in a belief system get really hard to see. Especially if questioning anything is blasphemy.

I would have gotten in so much trouble for insisting the teacher explain how Jesus helped us by being tortured to death by Romans even when God could have prevented it! God sent his only Son, they would have said! Be grateful, they'd say! Be guilty! Stop asking why he did that!!!

#original #religious trauma #<- what's up guys why did he do that??? for real i was raised catholic and it is FUCKING UNCLEAR but also the basis of a huge chunk of #my childhood?? like WHY though? my friend madeleine said it was related to animal sacrifices with the lamb of god stuff and all #this was NEVER mentioned in my school. i thought he was the lamb bc he followed god but maybe not #no wonder my impulse as a person is to constantly sacrifice myself unnecessarily #i think martyrdom is a bad gift. but i guess torture your son to death or whatever dude. but it's weird to do that and say it was for me #like...... thanks?? you're literally omnipotent but this is like the worst possible version of a cat leaving a dead mouse on my bed #Christianity #thank goodness i was too much of a fag to stay. i was so unhappy there. #the good place actually addresses a lot of my issues with Christianity as a whole while also not being all about Christianity #like what does it mean to condemn a person capable of change to eternal hell?M #*hell?? #the good place #god pays the devil's rent y'all. like in that post that made my long beautiful essay about this irrelevant by #summing it up with 'girl they are in cahoots.' i think about that post all the fukn time nothing i can write longform is as punchy as that

[quemaiglesias]

Drowning  

#sex trauma #religious trauma #trauma art #hypersexual #vent art #trauma vent #tw nudity #? i guess #my art #tw vent #tw sa implied #man I hate paint...water????? #weirdcore #weird to think about #horror art #??? maybe #is scary #for me #lol #idk lmao

[dragondroid]

When I was growing up, I remember wanting to die.

Not even in a depressive way- it was just part of being Christian to me. Our pastor spoke with tears of joy at the idea of the End Times finally wiping out the sinful Earth. In Sunday School, we were constantly told about how great heaven would be after we died (and told fiery, terrifying stories about how awful hell would be for non-christians). On the radio, there were Christian songs constantly talking about how great heaven would be, and how awful our world was in comparison.

I was seven years old. And I couldn't wait to die.

I fantasized about finally flatlining and walking into the light. I sincerely, dearly hoped that the end of the world would come, with all of its fire and brimstone, so I could be carried into heaven.

I was a child.

To this day, stories about heaven-like afterlives still provoke a very uncomfortable reaction from me. It brings me back to that feeling- of that pragmatic, eager yearning for death.

It's horrible. It can take over my mind for days until the rational part of me manages to shove it back down and remind me that dying is a bad thing, actually.

So, no. I'm not going to respect Christianity. Groups that make kids want to die don't deserve respect.

#exvangelical #ex christian #i guess this is an exchristian blog now #exchristian #atheism #atheist #religion is a cult #cults #religious trauma

[aa0akaace]

Two gay ass queers their relationship started by the "send this floppa to your crush" image

#me and my partners relationship started with a floppa image and we have a surprising ammount in common with these two #so yeah thats cannon now to me it happened source me my brain #guess which one of the two is me. hint: i have religious trauma #favorite #my art #ultrakill #gabriel ultrakill #v1 ultrakill #gabv1el

[nobetafortomorrowedie]

A fun bit of deconstructing Mormonism that I have been telling my Mormon homies is the whole murmuring thing, which hurt me so much growing up, basically being told that any time I voiced a negative feeling I was murmuring or complaining and that a real saint bears their burdens in silence or whatever. When I was six, eight, twelve, fourteen, sixteen, eighteen, etc... I couldn't even say I felt bad physically unless I was actually sick, much less talk about mental illness.

And I hear this from the people I'm still close to in the Mormon church. They say something about being really sad about something and then say they're sorry to complain about it, and I tell them every single time that complaining is only complaining if it's an inconvenience or if you're putting someone down. Telling people you're sad or upset or in pain is NEVER complaining. People need to know. It's okay to say you are unwell or unhappy. It's good! People want to help if they can, and if you don't want help it's still better to tell people so they know!

#mormonism #exmormon #exmo #anti mormonism #tw religious trauma #I still can't do this but it's never too late to learn I guess

[cartoonsun]

looks like an angel

#my art #traditional art #ink art #angel #religious trauma #I guess this is more of a tag than anything for religious themed art #self portrait