Tumgik
#she saw someone with a big heart and free spirit who was just as adventurous and curious as her and fell in love with him
cerealbishh · 9 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Just you and me, and I could be part of your world
143 notes · View notes
sweeteastart · 9 months
Text
💫KHOCWEEK 2023💫
Day 2 - New World
@khoc-week
Sika
Tumblr media
Who's this but my girl Sika ! A bit about this drawing :
Sika is a very free spirited and adventurous teen. She loves to ran right into the unknown without looking back. With this joyful but impulsive personality of her's, who else than Terra could ground her yet still let her enjoy the experience ?
I can easily picture Sika insisting they land on Lilo's and Stitch world to see the beautiful scenery. Terra obviously would end up folding because he relates to her sheltered childhood and wants her to experience new thing.
This piece was quite a challenge for me as I never ventured to drawing lilo and stitch before ahah
Bunny
The routine of the Vulpes union was all around rather boring for teenagers : taking note of the day's mission, going into some world they already visited hundreds of times before, collecting the bare minimum of lux and going back home black and blue from the fights against various heartless. Bunny couldn't say she hated it.
After all, once in a while, she could team up with her brother or friends. It was always fun to spend time with either even if the whole fighting for her life part wasn't the most relaxing. She felt stuck in a way in this rut, this ever ending circle that never stopped. For years now she has led this existence. The girl wasn't even fifteen and she already felt bored of the responsibilities and expectations everyone had of her.
Walking down a flowery path, she couldn't help but glance at her surroundings. This forest was simply breathtaking. Greenery upon greenery grew out of control, savage yet surreal in its beauty. She wondered when was the last time she came about such a beautiful world before. In the little time she had been exploring, she had seen numerous sceneries. Most were gorgeous… Well, really, all of them were for a child who grew up in a small coastal town.
Her eyes followed the tree seams, the grass paths, the little leaves falling from the sky. She was hypnotized. The nature was calm, birds singing far away. A new and foreign place. That's when she heard it. The splash of water. The slight rustling of someone nearby.
Her instincts kicked in before she even thought about it. Silently, heels barely touching the dirt, she moved towards the sounds. She had nailed the silent walk a while back. It was always a blessing to take vermin by surprise. It also made the job easier when she ran into trouble.
Before she saw her, her voice blessed her ears. The voice of an angel. Loud and clear, a song coming straight from a pure heart.
Jet black hair, as deep as crown feathers. It draped around her fair skin and round face like water. A soft face, smooth like a baby. Long ink coloured lashes stretched out to the infinity just on top of her deep eyes. It was like staring at the night sky during a new moon. The light twinkled in her big, doe eyes as she gazed toward Bunny.
If she didn't know any better, the Keyblade wielder would have thought of her as a goddess who descended straight to earth. Naively, unaware of the danger of a stranger suddenly appearing, the kid smiled largely.
"Hi" she said, a hand still in the river's cold water. "Who might you be ?"
For a moment, Bunny didn't know what to say. So she didn't. She opened then shut her mouth numerous times before words finally came to her. "Bunny"
It was all she could muster yet the girl who looked barely thirteen laughed. Not in a locking way but a loving way. Only with that, this little thing, the wielder knew she wanted to protect this smile.
"Happy to meet you, Bunny. My name's Snow white."
And there's my day 2 ! Soo I decided to do two character per day for this year one with an illustration and one with a little text ! I hope it's now too terrible ahah sorry if the text wonky, it was pretty much a last moment addition and English isn't my first language
18 notes · View notes
calypso707 · 10 months
Text
Dragon Age Inquisiton OS - The wolf's farewell.
I am a huge fan of the Dragon Age series, I spent hours and hours playing these games and I really love the universe so I wrote a little Solas x Fem Lavellan Inquisitor, something sad/fluff.
If you have any suggestions for me to write, I will be happy to do it !
Vocabulary :
Ma vhenan: my heart
Lethallan: casual reference used for someone with whom one is familiar
Ar lath ma, vhenan: i love you, my heart
Enjoy !
Tumblr media
"I'm Varric Thetras, a rebellious adventurer, talented storyteller and troublemaker in my spare time. I keep telling myself that for some people, life is just a succession of bad luck. Take Inquisitor Lavellan, she was living peacefully in her low cloister, close to her kin, but now she's got herself mixed up in all this shit. And what a mess it was! A twinkling hand, a hole in the sky and now the fate of the world depends on her..." he sighed. “I can't tell you how lucky I was to fight alongside her, it was... She's an exceptional mage and a dear friend. You know, I've been through a lot and I know exactly what kind of tragic end awaits heroes. But her, damn it!," he laughed. “She always managed to get out of the biggest messes, always just barely though! So, I hoped that maybe this story would end well... The assassination of Empress Celene had been thwarted and she had been reconciled with her ambassador Briala, raising the profile of elves in society. The Vennatori had been stopped and Corypheus defeated. Lavellan deserved a moment's peace and tranquillity, some people's spirits were celebrating this victory, but not hers... Heartbreak never does you any good, does it?"
She had been listening to the stories of her companions for hours. Iron Bull was talking for the umpteenth time how he had defeated a frost dragon in the Free Marches, Sera was telling the pranks she had played on Josephine during the day, while Dorian was describing partys he had attended in Tevinter, involving sex, alcohol and conspiracy. Things she had heard before and which would have amused her, but not tonight. And everyone had noticed. She saw Lelianna making her way back to the main room of the Fort, where the thrones were held and where the current festivities were taking place. The Inquisitor rose from her chair, looking at her companions still seated at the table: "If you'll excuse me, it's been a long day. I shall return to my chambers.”
Everyone greeted her and congratulated her again on having defeated Corypheus, which was ridiculous, she thought, because it was a joint effort. She walked towards her master spy, who had a grave look on her face. Her heart began to beat rapidly in her chest, she was dreading the words her companion was about to say. "I'm sorry, but we've heard nothing from Solas, my ravens and agents have found nothing. It's as if he suddenly disappeared..."
Lavellan remained silent for a few seconds, forcing herself not to falter, constantly repressing her emotions, something she had been doing since she became head of the Inquisition. She cleared her throat as if to regain composure and straightened her back: "Very well, thank you, Lelianna”
"I can continue the search, perhaps he'll come back eventually?" added the Nightingale, even she didn't believe in what she was saying. But she didn't want to hurt the Inquisitor, who had proved to be a good friend over time.
"It's no use, he won't be back" Lavellan took a deep breath. "Corypheus is defeated but we still have work to do, so enjoy this victory too, Lelianna, you've earned it.”
She didn't wait for a reply and headed for her chambers. She climbed the stone steps slowly, alone at last and feeling as if the sky was falling. Solas had left and taken her heart with him. An emptiness had formed in her chest, an immense pain. She sat down on the bed, which was far too big for her, and let her gaze wander over the mountains that encircled Skyhold. She thought back to all the times she had spent by his side, his knowledge of worlds, what he had taught her about the Fade, his intelligence, his presence, all of which she missed. Her heart had been torn from her and broken. She looked down at the mark on her hand, which glowed for a few seconds. She lay back, continuing to stare at it, before finally closing her eyes, seeking for peace.
When she was young, she had already wandered into the Fade, walking its winding paths in search of vestiges of the past. Today, she wandered there voluntarily in search of tranquillity and, above all, in the hope of drowning the grief that consumed her. It was a dangerous practice, of course, as it was well known that spirits and demons lurked there. She was standing not far from the forest where her clan had settled; there were no beings wandering around, but she was delighted to see the aravels, richly decorated with engravings and silk fabrics. She couldn't get enough of them, and came to miss her home, the clan, its members and its traditions.
As she continued to venture into the northern forest of the Free Marches, she saw a black wolf staring at her out of the corner of her eye. She wasn't worried, it was probably a lost spirit. The Inquisitor took a cautious step towards it, but it quietly moved away before she could reach it, turning to see if she was following, which she finally did. She continued to venture deeper into the woods, this wolf did not seem dangerous to her, on the contrary. But as they approached a lake, he suddenly disappeared. Two gigantic wolf statues stood nearby, like him, leading the way to the blue expanse of the lake. The view was magnificent, the lake surrounded by fir trees and behind them, the peaks of the mountains were visible, as if blending into the sky.
"Gone..." she mumbled.
"Ma vhenan" said a voice behind her.
A voice she recognised all too well, she froze in place, her heart missing a beat. With so many emotions in turmoil, she thought she was going to fall. She turned slowly, her gaze catching Solas's azure one. She took a step backwards, bumping into the statue behind her, putting her hand against it as if to hold on. He had disappeared and now he was standing in front of her, and she couldn't help noticing the armour he had put on, it wasn't like him. He had tricked her.
"The wolf.. You led me here... It’s like that dream in Haven, didn't you?" she asked finally, feverishly.
"I wanted to see you once more before..." he stopped talking, took a few steps towards her.
"I don't understand, you seem... Different..." the Inquisitor continued, examining him with her eyes. It was true, he gave off something different, something powerful and terrifying. She looked at the statues of wolves behind her; reminding her of stories from her childhood and reminding her of a particular god. Dalish legends tell of Fen'Harel, the implacable wolf, also known as the Lord of Deceit, who was vile and deceitful and showed no concern for his people. The elves turned to him for help and advice, but it always came at a price. Fen'Harel kept his promises, yes, but the way he kept them was often contested. She shook her head, as if to clear her mind of these foolish ideas. Had she fallen in love with a god?
"I am Fen'Harel," he announced. "But he came long after Solas, I inspire hope to my friends and fear to my enemies. Just like the Inquisitor"
"Was I fooled? All this time, I thought...’´She stared at him, in silence, completely lost and in disbelief.
"No, I didn't fool you, I would never have shared your bed under false pretenses" he was finally coming closer, he wanted to touch her, take her in his arms, love her but he wouldn't allow himself. He wanted to experience everything her heart desperately promised him. "I have very little time, Lethallan"
"You abandoned me, you left me. I loved you and you ran away," she said, her voice trembling. Her eyes filled with tears, she knew their love was doomed to failure but she refused to give up. He brushed her cheek with his thumb to wipe away a tear that was running down, sadness was taking hold of him, he was tortured. "Forgive me, vhenan, I never wished to cause you pain”
"We can stay together, whatever your plans are, I'll help you," begged Lavellan.
"No, this is something I must do alone. I want to save the elves, even if it means dooming this world. There is only death at the end of this journey and I can't inflict that on you" said Solas.
Lavellan looked at him for a long moment before lowering her head, tears streaming down her cheeks. The thought him alone, carrying out such a plan and destined for such a tragic end was suffocating her. She couldn't bring herself to leave him; he was the storm and she was the shipwreck that wanted to sail through the stormy waters until she sank. She loved him with a love that was immeasurable and destined to be forgotten. He closed the distance between them and ran a hand over her cheek to catch her attention, tucking a lock of hair behind her pointed ear. They exchanged a look heavy with love and pain. "My love, I'll never forget you"
And he kissed her. They kissed languorously and she clung to him desperately, not wanting him to disappear. She was terrified that she would never see him again and she prayed that he would continue to visit her in her dreams. If she hoped for a happy ending, he should have that too. They gently broke the kiss and he placed a chaste kiss next to her ear, whispering: "Ar lath ma, vhenan".
And she woke with a start, sitting up abruptly and out of breath. She looked around, she was in her room at Skyhold and Solas was gone. Her cheeks were still pink from her tears and her lips seemed moist from the farewell kiss he had offered her. As the Dalish say: "May the Dreadwolf take you away" and that's what he had done, he had taken her being and her heart with him.
9 notes · View notes
mrslittletall · 2 years
Text
Now that I finished my Ghibli watch (so many movies), let's give a mini review of how I liked each one:
Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind -> Amazing! Loved it. World building and characters were stellar. Just the 80ies sounds were a bit jarring. But all the time I watched at the movie and was going "Caelid?! Malenia?!"
Yeah, someone at FromSoft got inspired by this movie.
Castle in the Sky -> I thoroughly enjoyed this one. I liked the magical elements, the robots and the pirates. Also how the children decided in the end to give up on Laputa because there is already life up there. Beautiful.
Grave of the Fireflies -> Netflix didn't have it! So I have to watch it elsewhere! I want to, I heard the film fucks you up.
My Neighbour Totoro -> Cute and wholesome! Also realistic toddler character with Mei ^^ I loved it and I want to touch the cat bus.
Kiki's Delivery Service -> I would have loved to have 30 minutes more for the movie. It felt like it was over too soon. The moment Kiki was in the town, it felt like it was over again. I wish we could have spent more time with her.
Only Yesterday -> It was fine, but I felt myself more attached to Taeko's childhood flashbacks instead of her adult life.
Porco Rosso -> Felt a bit like it was going nowhere. Would have loved to see the romance between Porco and the opera lady explored more.
Ocean Waves -> Oh god, don't let me go on a Rikako rant. I HATE HER! Yeah, the movie was boring and the ending downright frustrating. I need to watch the scene of Taku bitchslapping Rikako to feel inner peace.
Pom Poko -> I watched this one ages ago on free TV, but remember enough. It was enjoyable, but without knowlegde of the japanese tanuki myth this movie must come over as WEIRD.
Whisper of the Heart -> Ocean Waves wanted to be this, but failed. I loved this one. Especially the scene where Country Roads was sung. A good coming of age story for a girl who doesn't know where she stands in life yet.
Princess Mononoke -> Classic. Watched it ages ago. Can't rewatch and it is a bummer. Why do there have to be TWO blood vomiting scenes in this movie which scare me? A LOT?! Maybe I rewatch and just look elsewhere during the scenes where San accompanies the hurt boar…
My Neighbours the Yamadas -> Didn't watch. Feels like it was based on a Showa era manga. Showa era humour is just cringe to me.
Spirited Away -> First Ghibli movie ever. Saw in the cinema. Rewatched a few times. A classic. Deserved the Oscar. Noface is best.
The Cat Returns -> A bit short. But a cute adventure with cats. Reuses the baron of Whispers of the Heart. I liketo think that was the book that the protag of this movie actually published ^^
Howl's Moving Castle -> Howl is a drama queen and we love him for it. Loved this movie. Fantastic. Loved Howl's monster form and that Sophie is a monsterfucker.
Just was annoyed by dub voice for young Sophie. Sounded horrible.
Tales from Earthsee -> Someone tried to condense a huge fantasy novel into a two hour movie. Didn't work. The characters barely could shine.
Hilarious accidental trans character in the dub. The villain wizard was clearly male, was called he/him and called lord, but had a female dub voice. I couldn't help but headcanon him as trans masc thanks to it.
Ponyo ->Cuuuute. Ponyo and Sosuke are so cute. Ponyo's fish face weirded me out though.
Arietty -> Probably one of the best borrower adaptations out there. Just disliked the ending. I really wanted them to move into the dollhouse.
From Up on Poppy Hill -> Boring. Barely remember the movie.Main character was flaaat.
The Wind Rises -> Strange. Half of the movie felt like a dream. Excellent animation on the earthquake though.
The Tale of the Princess Kaguya -> EXCELLENT! Animation and style is BEAUTIFUL! I love the music, I loved the retelling of the fairy tail. This movie is nothing short but art.
When Marnie was there -> This movie is a tearjerker. A BIG one, but I have an issue with it. It had very sapphic feelings and then they reveal that Marnie was Anna's grandmother all along?! Dude, then why the queerbait?!
Earwig and the Witch -> Didn't watch. Didn't want to watch movie which was 3D animated. I wanted to watch all the 2D animated ones. If you think I should give the movie a chance, I will watch it.
6 notes · View notes
bvidzsoo · 3 years
Text
White Lilies
Tumblr media
 Author: bvidzsoo
 Pairing: Jeon Wonwoo x female reader
 Warning: swearing, violence, mentions of death, stalking, breaking in, borderline toxic relationship, allude to some mental health conditions but never named
 Word count: 26, 815
 Summary: Your brother, Kim Doyoung, works for the police. Ever since you finished high school, you moved away from home with him and now you live in a big city. You struggle with different things, but the worst one is the tendency to stalk others. And one day when you walk inside a coffee shop and come across a very handsome stranger, you can’t help yourself, he becomes your next target. Jeon Wonwoo. But he isn’t innocent, you find that out the hard way.
 Taglist: @chal-kagyu​ @taeyongandfree​ @minkwans​ @itsdnguyenxoxo​ @rjsmochii​
 Unable to tag: @cheolliehugs @3rachaonlyfans @leahxxiong
 A/N: Here it is! The spin off to Poison, it can be read as a stand alone, if not check out the mini-series: Poison. Minor things will make more sense. I hope it doesn’t bother you that I tagged you for this too, since it’s connected in some ways. Now, there’s things I have written in this oneshot that are totally not okay and I am very conscious of them, so please, if you ever come across a stalker or someone who harassess you, please report them, your safety is very important. But this is fiction, and I’m allowed to write whatever I want to. All the sentences in italics are the voices that Y/N hears. Enjoy now and don’t forget to leave feeback!
           All mornings were usually the same, it was a routine I became accustomed to a long time again. Five years ago, actually, when Doyoung and I moved away from home. There is only a two-year difference between us, so it was easy for me to follow him, having been already done with high school. Doyoung completed the police academy and he was being promoted, brought to Seoul, so I packed up and left my old life in our hometown. Nothing tied me to that place, I never liked it there. My parents were hot headed and they always argued with me, trying to convince me to become a house wife, to find myself a wealthy man that would care for me and for our family. But it wasn’t what I needed; I had always been a free spirit. I liked to explore and disappear from civilization from time to time. Like in eleventh grade, when I sneaked out and disappeared for ten days, the whole city was looking for me. However, I was living in the woods, by the outskirts of the city, in a small hut with a nice, old lady. She moved there after she gave up her job, because she wanted a peaceful life, surrounded by nature only. When she saw me wandering around, she offered me some tea and I accepted it, surprised to see someone living there. The hut wasn’t deep inside the woods, but it still took me by surprise that a lady like her wasn’t afraid inside there all alone. I wasn’t a big fan of forests, but being surrounded by trees and the green scenery always calmed my erratic nature. It was hard for me to stay still sometimes, that’s why Doyoung and I would regularly go on runs, to try and use up my energy on something. In school, I didn’t do very well, but it didn’t bother me. I was able to finish high school and get a diploma, but I didn’t want to go to college. I found it a waste of time and money, I decided I would find something that I liked doing and would excel in it. And with the help of the old lady from the hut, I realized I had a passion for photography. I got my first camera from her, and ever since then I didn’t stop taking pictures. It became my passion and my hobby, it earned me money. I was known for taking nature pictures, sometimes even of animals, and I had my own little blog where I posted all of my works. Sometimes I’d have my pictures put up in galleries for expositions, I earned well during those events. The small house Doyoung and I lived in, was full of all the pictures I took. We lived in a homey, quiet neighborhood, deep inside the heart of the city. Doyoung earned well and my salary always fluctuated, that’s why I decided to stay with my big brother, at least until I had gathered enough money to live on my own.
The house smelled of bacon and peppermint tea as I opened the window of my room, letting the fresh morning air in. I was already dressed for the day, camera packed safely inside my bag, waiting for a call. I wore dark velvet cotton pants and an oversized grey sweater with a deep V, due to which it fell off my shoulders. Ankle high heel boots and a few necklaces I used as accessories complimented the look. It was becoming warmer and warmer outside, which was great, because I never liked wearing coats. Besides, I rarely needed them, I had the unusual trait of not exactly feeling the cold. I was always underdressed during winter and it scared some people, especially Doyoung because he had the impression that I’d catch a cold, but it’s just how my body was, always too hot. I checked my phone to be sure that Mark didn’t decide to text me instead of calling me, but seeing there was nothing, I closed the window and took my bag, leaving my room. I closed the door after me, a habit I had, and headed inside the kitchen. Doyoung was in his police uniform already, moving around quietly the kitchen.
“Good morning!” I called loudly, sitting at the table, with my chin in my hand.
“Good morning.” Doyoung greeted, quieter, and turned around with a plate and mug in his hands. He placed them in front of me and I grinned, thanking him. I took the fork and dug into my breakfast, humming at how tasty it was. Even if our mornings were always the same, the breakfast wasn’t. Doyoung always had something up his sleeves, either trying out new recipes he searched up late at night, or just trying to replicate mother’s old recipes. I took a sip of the peppermint tea and pursed my lips, giving Doyoung a thumbs up as he closed the stove and turned to sit with his own plate and mug in his hands. He chuckled and mirror my thumbs up, before starting to eat too. We ate in silence, it’s how we were in the mornings, quiet. It was the only time Doyoung could savor the silence, because it was the only time I was silent. My hyperactivity followed me through all stages of life, I still struggled with staying still…that amongst other things.
Doyoung cleared his throat and I glanced at him, before checking my phone again, “What are your plans for today?”
“Ah, the usual.” I answered with a smile, trying to look nonchalant, so that he wouldn’t realize I was lying, “I’ll just go to the park and take some pictures if I find something I like.”
Doyoung nodded and took a bite of his bacon, “Don’t you think it’s time to…find a more stable work?”
“Like what?”
“Getting employed at a studio, maybe? You know…you could go to weddings, birthdays…all kinds of events to take pictures.” Doyoung’s suggestion was friendly, but it still angered me. I left home because I didn’t want to hear the constant nagging of our parents, but here he was, doing the same thing.
“I’m a nature photographer. And I wouldn’t like working inside a studio, or whatever.” I said a little harshly, making Doyoung sigh.
“I’m not judging you or trying to tell you what to do,” He knew how I could react to these things, he knew how much anxiety my parents induced when they would try and tell me what to do with my own life, “It was just a brotherly advice, because I worry about you.”
“You don’t have to!” I exclaimed cheerily, my phone ringing at the same time. I shot my hand out to grab it and answered the phone, already knowing who the caller was.
“Target is getting ready to leave, he’ll be at the same Coffee Shop he was for the past week.” Was all the person said before I hung up, stuffing the rest of the food inside my mouth hurriedly. I scrambled up from the chair and clumsily threw my phone inside my bag, trying to chug down the peppermint tea at the same time.
“Who was that?”
“Just some person trying to sell me something—” A burp I couldn’t control surfaced and Doyoung’s eyebrows furrowed in displeasure, but I just gave him an apologetic smile, “I’ll see you after work.”
I pressed a hasty kiss against his cheek, then raced to my car and unlocked it, throwing my bag inside before getting in. I would have to get to the Coffee Shop before the target gets there, to choose a good spot. This is what Doyoung didn’t know about me. I wasn’t just a nature photographer, I worked together with his colleague, Mark, whose job was to gather information about the targets the police had. He was really good at it, but sometimes he couldn’t gather enough information by sitting behind a computer. That’s where I come in play, I go out and stalk his targets. A year ago, Doyoung had a gathering with the colleagues he was closer to and I was invited too. Mark got really drunk and I offered to drive him home, that’s when he started telling me about his work. About how he already almost got fired twice, because his information wasn’t good enough or it was lacking. And because I was always seeking new experiences and new adventures, I proposed to help him. Of course, he’d have to pay me, but I’d stalk the targets for as long as he’d need me to. Until all information that was needed was gathered for him, which he could turn into a report and pass onto the higherups. He accepted without a second thought in his drunken haze and I was beyond happy; but I asked him to keep it a secret, especially from Doyoung. If my brother were to find out, he’d definitely either lock me up in our basement or send me back home, both were things I wouldn’t be able to survive. And being in this city was good for me, it was big enough that it distracted me from my other issues. Back in my hometown, everyone knew almost everyone and it was too easy to find someone you wanted to know. Which was bad for me, bad for someone who had stalking tendencies. That’s why I have been working with Mark for a year now, I was just too good, no one ever discovered me or my identity. I knew how to stay low-key and I knew how to work around the targets without them noticing that someone was trailing them almost 24/7. Having this job, it distracted me from getting infatuated with anyone, I didn’t have the time anymore. And it was a lot more thrilling to be trailing different people each month. It was a distraction from the dark voices in my head, which tried telling me that the next man that appeared around the corner could have been the love of my life. Or the woman that I ran into at the flower shop, could have been my soulmate. I hated those thoughts, and I battled with them my whole life. I used to take medication, it silenced them while I was a teen, but it still didn’t stop me from stalking others. So, as I grew older, I stopped taking them and I started spending more time in nature, where I was alone. Photography wasn’t just a job for me, it was my own therapy.
           Everything was set up perfectly, I grinned widely as I leaned back in my seat. My bag was on the chair next to me, the camera placed on the table. For this to work, I needed as many people as there were inside the Coffee Shop to see it. Thankfully, traffic wasn’t bad and I got here five minutes before the target. I sat close to the exit, from where I could see the whole shop well and could run away too if something happened. The target too was really transparent, he sat at the same table he’s been sitting at for the past week. Next to the big windows, behind his table there were a bunch of plants decorating the place and a painting of flowers was hung above it. Which was perfect for me, my plan was coming together. The target has already ordered his coffee, so now it was my time to do something. I took my wallet and walked up to the barista, having hung the camera around my neck. The weight of it was comforting, having worn it for so long, that it became something familiar. I smiled at the barista and looked over the menu behind her, acting like I was thinking of what I wanted, offering her enough time to take in my attire closely.
“I’ll have Caramel Macchiato.” Finally, I told her and she nodded, returning the smile, as I handed her the money.
“A name?” I was glad this wasn’t the barista who took my orders the other times, I didn’t want them to recognize me. I wouldn’t come to this Coffee Shop either way anymore after I was done with this job.
“Y/N.” I answered the barista and she nodded, passing the cup with my name written on it, to her colleague. She printed the receipt and handed it to me, her eyes falling onto my camera. As there was no customer behind me at the moment, she looked at me curiously.
“You’re a photographer?” She asked as the coffee brewer started making loud noises.
“A nature photographer!” I told her with excitement and the barista nodded her head, offering me a friendly smile.
“I tried it once, it wasn’t made for me.” We chuckled at her words and I just shrugged.
“It requires patience and technique, for sure.” I said and she nodded her head in agreement, “By the way…this floral arrangement—”
And then I turned my body sideways, eyes falling on the target. He was just a few feet away, I made sure to speak even louder, so that he would hear me, “The floral arrangement is so pretty! Do you mind if I take pictures of it?”
The barista thought about it as my drink was done and handed to me by the other worker, “I don’t think it’s a problem, go ahead!”
“Thank you!” I bowed my head a little and she bid me farewell. My plan was working, I just needed to do one more thing. So, with the most innocent expression I could muster up, I approached the target. I knew he heard the conversation between me and the barista, but I wanted to make sure he understood what I was about to do.
“Sir, excuse me—” I spoke softly, almost shyly, “Do you mind if I take pictures of this floral arrangement? You won’t be in frame at all.”
“Go ahead.” He answered me with a very uninterested shrug, the wrinkles around his eyes made him look older than the age Mark told me. I bowed my head and placed my Caramel Macchiato on top of his table, turning on my camera. I kneeled on one knee and started snapping photos of the plants, pursing my lips, trying to get the perfect angle. Then I rose to my feet, and took another one, the painting above it being included in the shot too.
“I’ll take some more from my own table, just letting you know…” I spoke up again, but the man wasn’t paying attention to me. I smirked a little, grabbing my drink from his table, cradling it in both of my hands. With a victorious look on my face, I turned with enthusiasm and took a step forward blindly. My body slammed into another body, and we both yelped loudly. Mine was high pitched, but the other one was deep and almost guttural. My heart started thumping in my chest loudly, taken aback by the accident, and hopeful that I didn’t spill my drink on my favorite sweater nor on the person I ran into.
“I’m so—” But when I looked up, I was left breathless. The man standing in front of me was frowning, looking over himself, to check if anything got spilled on him. Thankfully, the lid of the drink was put on really well and the way I was holding the cup stopped it from spilling out. The thumping of my heart became deafening and all I could see suddenly was the man standing in front of me.
He’s the one. Don’t let him slip past your fingertips.
The dark voice, however, quickly snapped me out of the state I almost got lost in. The target, I’m here on a very serious mission, Mark’s counting on me. But the man’s eyes would be forever ebbed inside my mind, I knew I would think about his sharp, fox like eyes before going to sleep tonight…or every night. Round glasses sat on his long nose and he pushed them up with his long fingers, they almost fell off at the impact. When his lips started moving, all I could see was the redness of them and how deep his Cupid’s bow was. Then I snapped out of it, eyebrows furrowing as I totally missed what he just said.
“Uh—I’m really sorry.” I said awkwardly, stepping back when I realized how close our bodies were to each other.
“It’s fine, you didn’t spill any on me…or you.” His eyes went to the sweater I was wearing for a second before he looked back up. His deep voice sent goosebumps down my skin and I very visibly shivered, but I wasn’t cold. The dark blue hoodie this handsome stranger wore seemed to be alright.
“Yeah, I didn’t spill it…” My mind felt like it was made out of gum, I had no coherent thoughts and it made me feel awkward. Taking a last glance at the handsome stranger, noting how his black hair was clumsily parted above his left eye, I bowed, and then willed myself to move away.
He’s everything you’ve ever wanted.
I walked back to my table and took a seat, taking a deep breath in. I can’t let myself get distracted. I run into strangers all the time; this handsome, deep voiced man wasn’t different at all. I couldn’t let the voices get to me, I had to focus on the target. So, I took a big gulp of my Caramel Macchiato and then looked at the target. He was tapping the table almost nervously, so I turned on my camera again and took two pictures of him, then one of the floral arrangement to make sure it didn’t look suspicious. I looked around the Coffee Shop and my eyes fell on the handsome stranger, who was laughing with the barista. What could they have been talking about? The jingling of the door snapped me out of my own thoughts and I watched as a tall woman, wearing a business suit, walked inside. Her hair was in a low ponytail and she looked fairly young, I almost lost interest in her, but then she sat across from the target. I took another picture of the floral arrangement and then snapped a bunch of pictures of the two, making sure the woman’s face could be seen well in all. There was movement in the corner of my eyes and I saw the stranger sitting at a table close to the front desk.
You should snap a picture of him too.
I cleared my throat and took another sip of my drink, the target and the young woman got up from their table, and I quickly went to grab my bag and pushed my camera inside. As I stood up, a name was called.
“Wonwoo?” And I saw the handsome stranger stand up and walk up to the barista to take his drink. Wonwoo, that’s his name. But I shook my head and waved at the barista with a cheerful smile as I quickly left the Coffee Shop, eyes narrowing to see the couple. To my luck, they were walking on the other side of the road, so I remained on this side and fished out my camera.
So, you’ll leave Wonwoo for that pathetic old man and the woman? He’s not more important?
I shook my head and snapped a few pictures as I walked on the sidewalk, getting to a cross. I crossed the road and cursed when they disappeared around the corner, I had to speed up; and threw the cup in the trash bin as I have finished my drink. I looked around once I turned the corner and panicked for a second, thinking I lost the target. But suddenly, I spotted them sitting on a bench in the park, so I headed that way. I started taking pictures of the river and the few birds sitting by the shore, then of the trees that have blossomed already. The white cherry blossoms were beautiful and I smiled to myself as a light breeze brushed my hair. Then I willed myself to focus again and turned the camera towards the target and the woman, who had decided to take a walk. There was a decent distance between them and I, and to anyone else, it would look like I’m taking pictures of the nature; which I was still kind of doing. The couple walked around for at least five minutes, and I decided to sit on a bench and watch them from there, putting on my shades as the sun was directly in front of me. I was just about to snap a picture of a little duck family, but the woman leaned in towards the target and I quickly started snapping pictures of them. It looked like she whispered something in his ear and then a kiss was pressed against the target’s cheek and the woman walked the opposite way they have come in. I snapped pictures of her alone too before turning back towards the target, who was on his phone. He was on the other side of the river, and I couldn’t have reached him in time, or follow him, my car was ten minutes away from here. So, I just continued snapping more pictures, and my eyebrows furrowed when someone got into the frame. The black hair covered the side of the picture, and I moved a little to the left, leaning against the trunk of a tree. I snapped pictures of the license plate and of the target as he got inside the car, seeing someone already inside of it. I smirked to myself as the car drove away and pulled my phone out, going to my contacts. I pressed the icon next to the name ‘Money Bag’ and it dialed the number.
“Anything?” Mark picked up on the first ring.
“A young chick showed up, but they split up and I lost both. My car wasn’t close enough.”
“That’s fine, where are you now?”
“At the park, by the river.”
“Okay, meet me in front of the town hall.” I hung up and placed everything inside my bag as I started walking back to my car, enjoying the weather and the warm sunlight. Spring was finally around the corner, it was the perfect time to snap pictures of nature, or at least, my favorite time. As a second thought, I took my camera into my hands and turned it on, curious of how the nature pictures turned out. I scrolled past the ones of the target and woman, and chuckled when the one with the ducks came into view. They were cute, people would like this. As I continued looking through the pictures, the ones where someone got into them, made me frown. I was about to delete them, but my finger paused. Black hair, sharp jaw, long nose, round glasses.
You know you can’t delete it. You can’t fight the urge, can’t you? Wonwoo’s the one, listen to us!
Tumblr media
           The town hall wasn’t far from the park, so I didn’t bother driving there. Besides, I liked taking walks. It helped with calming me, even though I was desperately in need of a run right now. After waking up, Doyoung and I go straight for a run, but I slept in this morning and I’m sure Doyoung woke up later too as he worked until late last night. He said his boss, Sana, was making him work extra hours because she was sniffing around a very powerful mafia leader. I was aware of the illegal things some people did, sometimes the people I had to stalk for Mark weren’t the brightest, I was well aware of that, but I was never offered information about them. It was Mark’s way of protecting me from harm, which I didn’t think did much. If I was caught, they wouldn’t care if I knew or not things about them, I probably would have been still tortured. Which is why I asked Mark to keep the details to himself, if I knew that I was stalking a mafia leader or some other gang member, I probably would’ve been too scared to go through with the procedure.  
I was shifting my weight from one leg to another as I stood waiting around for Mark, pouting when I looked down at my wrist watch. I’ve been standing here for ten minutes; I was becoming really bored. I took my phone and sent a text to Doyoung, checking up on him.
From Doyoung: Just had my lunch break, I’ll be heading back to work. It’s possible I’ll be back late once again.
To Doyoung: No problem, I’ll leave some dinner for you.
From Doyoung: What are you up to?
To Doyoung: I’ll be going for a run in a few minutes, see you at home!
From Doyoung: Take care of yourself!
I smiled and as I looked up, Mark was walking towards me. I started waving at him with a big grin, my phone almost fell from my grip, but I managed to steady it. Mark was wearing dark jeans and a black hoodie, with a black baseball cap on his head. If this was him trying to be casual, he was failing.
“Stop drawing attention to us!” He said with a hiss as he came to a stop in front of me and I frowned.
“That’s not how you should treat someone so important to your team.” I said and Mark rolled his eyes, extending one hand. He was gripping some cash and I took it with a grin, quickly placing it inside my bag.
“Well, since you asked so nicely…” I said teasingly and Mark rolled his eyes again, I handed him the memory card, “Take good care of it! And don’t delete the other pictures I took; some came out really well!”
“I won’t.” He said with a grin and then looked down at the card, “Your job is done here, wait until I contact you again. You could go on a vacation or something.”
I laughed quietly, giving Mark a look, “Yes, captain, I might just do that.”
Mark shook his head before taking off with a wave, I waved back and then turned to walk inside the second-hand shop. I greeted the lady and told her I just wanted to change inside the cabin, so she left me alone. I changed my normal attire into my running one. Yoga pants and adidas, a black top with a fluffy hoodie over it. I pulled my hair in a low bun and stuffed everything inside my big bag, it’s why I carried it around. Random runs were the best, always exciting as I never knew where I felt like going for one. I smiled at the lady from front desk as I left the shop, heading for my car. The walk was quick because I tried to hurry up, excited to go for the run. Once I got to my car, I placed my bag inside and then locked it, having my phone and keys in the pocket of the hoodie. I headed back to the park where I took the pictures of the target and woman, and first did a little warm up. I stretched my legs out and back a little, and then started running. I took steady breaths as I ran down the path, my pace not very fast but not slow either. My heartrate picked up as I continued running and I marveled in the peace around me. The scenery brought a smile onto my lips as I ran past some couples; I willed my mind to stop thinking. It was a hard thing to do at first, I was always thinking of something, but I had to learn due to the dark voices that would sometimes push me into doing things. I could ignore them, now better than when I was younger, but it was still difficult. The problem was, they could drive me crazy, I couldn’t ignore them forever, and in times like those, I would disappear. Doyoung hated it when I did that, but I haven’t had an episode like that in long.
But you can’t stop thinking about Wonwoo. You want him, you know it. You can’t lock us away anymore, Y/N, we are here. Wonwoo wants you too. Didn’t you see the way he looked at you? He fell for you, Y/N, listen to us once again. Do it. Just ask Mark. He’ll find him in a second for you. You didn’t delete his picture; you have his name—
A loud shout left my lips as I tumbled over some rocks that were on the path, but thankfully I didn’t fall. My eyebrows furrowed as I crouched down to hug my knees against my chest. I can’t let the voices get to me. I can’t let one stranger fuck up what I built up with so much struggle. I couldn’t let a stranger rule my life. I wouldn’t let the voices get to me, no matter what. I was stronger than that. With a deep breath, chest rising and falling quickly, I turned around and started running back. The energy burst I had this morning seemed to have disappeared, which was a good sign. I would have to take a bath at home and then cook some dinner, edit the pictures I took today after Mark drops off the memory card and post them on my blog. Well, that settles it then, I smiled as I came to the end of the path. I slowed down to a walk and took deep breaths, leveling my breathing. I turned to walk on the sidewalk and felt the breeze brush my hair once again, making me shiver a little bit. My body was warm from the run and I concluded that sitting inside my warm car while I was sweaty was probably a better idea than spending more time outside, in the cold breezy weather. But my mind went numb when I saw the black-haired man sitting on a bench with a book in his hands. My feet were still moving, but it felt like I wasn’t in control of it anymore. The Universe was really testing me today. I bit my lower lip and unconsciously grabbed my phone inside my pocket.
No, the Universe is doing for you what you didn’t want to do, Y/N. He’s right there, sitting on that bench, waiting for you. How could you let this opportunity slip past your fingertips? You want it, so do it.
I didn’t realize it until it was too late, my finger had already pressed the button, a picture of Wonwoo having been taken. I hated myself for doing it, but it felt like all stress finally left my body. I felt at ease, I wasn’t fighting with my thoughts anymore, with the dark voices. In the end, I really didn’t have a choice but to fall back into my old habits. And I was doing so well, until Wonwoo showed up. What will Doyoung think if he finds out? I can’t be sent to a psychic ward again, it wouldn’t help. They never help; I hate the medication they give me. I can survive without them too. Maybe if I stalk him for a week or two, I can get rid of the voices and go back to how I was before meeting him. But I pressed the button again, another picture snapped of Wonwoo. I wasn’t walking anymore, I was rooted in one place, mouth hanging open as I gazed at Wonwoo in awe. I must have looked hilarious, crazy even, but I didn’t care. I couldn’t look away; I couldn’t even move. But then suddenly, he didn’t flip the page of the book like he was planning to do, instead, he looked up. And his eyes fell on me, as if he felt that I was looking at him, and I jumped. His furrowed eyebrows snapped me out of my delirium, his sharp gaze sent a shiver down my spine and suddenly I found myself running away. I didn’t care what he thought, I was ashamed that I let the voices control me; it was time I headed home. It would be safer for everyone else if I just stayed at home.
That’s our girl, you’re doing amazing.
           The first thing I did once I got home was clean the house, my blood was boiling as I lost grip of the voices, which kept celebrating for I have taken those two pictures of Wonwoo in the park. In that rage, I deleted them from my phone and threw my phone in the trash bin I had in my room, slamming the door shut as I went to the bathroom to grab what I needed to clean the house. I turned on music, played it loudly too, blocking out the noises coming from outside, but the voices in my mind too. Due to my rage, I was done in almost two hours, it usually would take longer if someone tried to clean the house alone, we had a lot of stuff despite it not being a big house. Once I calmed down, I went to the kitchen and made some ramen, sweet potatoes made in the oven, and some seasoned pork. I went and bought beer for Doyoung and myself, and after putting them in the fridge, I decided to check my phone to see if anyone tried looking for me. It was six in the afternoon and I hoped Doyoung didn’t think that I was kidnapped…well, he’d actually know that. For my own safety, he installed an app on my phone that could track me. I only accepted it because I knew he worried a lot about me, Doyoung and I had a strong bond and the episodes I had always broke him mentally, I tried to be a better person for him too.
From Doyoung: I don’t think the ramens in the cupboard are still edible. Text me if you get home!
To Doyoung: Well, I cooked those ramens, so now they are edible! Sorry, I cleaned the house so I wasn’t around my phone…
From Doyoung: Cleaned the house? Are you feeling alright?
I chuckled at the fast reply, no surprise Sana made him stay plus hours if he hung on his phone while on duty.
To Doyoung: Don’t worry, I’m feeling perfectly fine! I hope Sana pays you well if you stay after working hours!
From Doyoung: Don’t worry about that, she stays with me.
To Doyoung: Oh! Someone’s getting it!
I laughed as Doyoung started typing back, imagining his angry and flustered face.
From Doyoung: Don’t be silly, Y/N!
To Doyoung: Okay, bye!
I laughed as I walked to the bathroom, turning on the warm water to have a bath. After the long day I had today, I deserved a warm, relaxing bath. I got a message from Mark, a thumbs up, and I knew the memory card was in the mailbox, so I quickly jumped into some shoes and ran outside to retrieve it. I locked the front gate, Doyoung had keys too, and then hurried back inside the house. I placed the memory card on my desk and then proceeded to undress while walking back to the bathroom. I turned the faucet off and threw some bath salts into the water, pulling my hair in a high bun. I shut the blinds of the bathroom and sighed, biting my lower lip. Would it be so bad if I asked Mark to look up Wonwoo a little bit? I wouldn’t try to do anything, I just wanted to know him better? I wasn’t doing anything wrong, right? I picked up my phone reluctantly as I sat on the side of the bathtub, easing my legs into the water. I went to my gallery and to the pictures I deleted, they didn’t get instantly deleted from my phone, they were stored there for another month before finally getting deleted off the device. I selected the two pictures of Wonwoo and sent them to Mark.
To Mark: His name is Wonwoo. Remember that favor you have going on? Return it by looking this guy up.
I threw the phone onto the clothing pile that was on the ground by the bathtub and lowered myself into the water, feeling bad that I couldn’t resist the urge. It was too easy with Mark, when I was a teenager, I would do everything by myself. It was thrilling to run after someone, watch them from a distance not knowing if they would notice you or not. And if they indeed noticed you, you could always play it off somehow. But this was safer, I couldn’t risk falling back into my old habits. It was like gambling or drugs…you needed rehabilitation from it, but the yearning never really goes away. I hated myself for doing this, but without the medication I so refused to take, I wasn’t strong enough. I wouldn’t admit that to others or myself, living in a lie was always easier. But tonight, I would allow myself to live in a fantasy.
·       Name: Jeon Wonwoo
·       Birth date: 1996. 07.17.
·       Height: 1,82 m
·       Siblings: Kim Mingyu, apparently they are both adopted
·       Job: Chauffeur of a business man
·       Places he’s frequently seen at: National library, Sunday Gym, Red Corner bookstore, various parks around his neighborhood, hiking trails around the forest, Soul BBQ, Sky Blue headquarters
·       Car: red Mercedes CLS class
·       Additional things I found about him: It seems like he has thirteen close friends, he lives with his adopted brother; but I couldn’t find the address anywhere. Surveillance cameras say that he usually goes to read in the park, by the river, and he drinks a lot of coffee. I’m pretty sure he wears glasses, but there’s few pictures of him wearing it. I’m sorry, Y/N, for some reason this is everything I could find about him. He’s got a clean record, and even the little information I gave you I could barely find. Something’s fishy, but maybe he really isn’t that interesting. I wouldn’t bother with someone like him. P.S. Don’t tell anyone I helped you gain information on him, they’ll fire me!
Tumblr media
       The birds chirping were the first thing I heard as I woke up, then the hurried knocks on my door. I groaned loudly, voice hoarse from having just woken up, and the knocking stopped.
“Get up, it’s almost 9 am!” Doyoung’s voice called from the other side of the door and I sighed, burying my head in my pillow, “I’m heading in to work later. I can drive you to wherever you want to go, if you want me to.”
That definitely got my attention as I raised my head, “Okay!”
I cleared my throat and jumped up into a seated position, looking around my bed. Printed pictures lingered scattered around the blanket and my laptop was on the verge of falling off, so I grabbed it and got out of bed. I walked to my desk and placed it on top of it, leaning against the edge of the glass. I looked down at the pictures that were on my bed and decided, that I would do this. I stayed up until late night to research myself as much as I could about Wonwoo, but he had no social media. I found a few yearbook photos of him, but they didn’t help with much. Mark was right, he seemed to be a very boring person…he almost felt like a ghost, like his real identity was buried deep down. And that was exciting, so, if Doyoung had already offered to give me a lift, I could just head to the Red Corner bookstore and check it out for myself. Hopefully, Wonwoo would be there. I still don’t know his schedule, but if I start lurking around the places Mark told me about, I can very easily follow Wonwoo around once he shows up.
After having breakfast with Doyoung, we both got dressed and I gave him instructions to the Red Corner bookstore and we were off, rolling down the busy streets of the city. My fingers were tapping against my knees in excitement as I tried to stay still, trying not to alert Doyoung that I was feeling excited about something. But he was my brother, and he noticed.
“I didn’t know going to a bookstore could make you excited.” He raised an eyebrow and I chuckled, shaking my head.
“It’s not that, I’m just in a good mood!” I tried to lie, but Doyoung just shook his head; I knew he didn’t believe me.
“So…now you suddenly like to read?” He asked with a teasing grin and I scoffed, turning to look at him.
“What do you mean?” I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms in front of my chest, “I always liked to read!”
“Fashion magazines, maybe.” I huffed and it made Doyoung laugh as he drove through an intersection. Once Doyoung was done laughing, he cleared his throat and briefly glanced at me.
“You wouldn’t be so excited about books unless you’re stalking someone.” I failed to pick up on the playfulness in his voice, the way he bit his lower lip to try and stay serious. My heart started suddenly beating really fast and my grip tightened around the seatbelt, my whole body became tense. How did he realize? Did he walk inside my room while I was sleeping? Was it something in my words that gave it away? Did I get worse at hiding my feelings? I could feel Doyoung’s gaze on me, but I couldn’t move out of fear. I was scared of what was coming next and ashamed. But then, Doyoung gasped and I had to look at him.
“I’m sorry!” He exclaimed, panic lacing his words, and I became confused, “I didn’t mean to say that—I—I worded that so badly, Y/N—”
“Oh,” I chuckled, trying to collect myself, “No, it was a joke! I totally get it!”
I couldn’t believe I almost gave myself away. He had no idea; he was just teasing me! I chuckled again, feeling at ease as I turned to look at Doyoung again. “Seriously, I totally got your joke!”
“I’m still sorry—” My laughter interrupted Doyoung and he just shook his head, still looking guilty.
“I could become an actress if my reaction made you react like this.” But in truth, my reaction was genuine and I was so thankful that Doyoung didn’t realize that. He could read people very easily, but maybe as he was driving he couldn’t focus fully, which was great for me. Doyoung sighed and he pulled up to the sidewalk, looking at the Red Corner bookstore, which was just across the road. I smiled and unbuckled the seatbelt; I pressed a kiss against Doyoung’s cheek then got out. He offered me a small wave before driving away. I took a deep breath and smiled, looking around the street. It didn’t look like a very busy neighborhood; a few people were walking here and there. To my right there were many narrow alleys that lead to the main road, and I took off down the street. Why would Wonwoo come to a bookstore in this side of the city if he could go to the big one at the mall? Wonderingly, I crossed the street and carefully approached the bookstore. It wasn’t open yet, so I figured I could go to the coffee shop I saw while Doyoung drove us here. The bookstore would only open in half an hour, I still had time. I walked down the street with a skip in my steps, smiling widely. I had a feeling today was going to be a successful day, but for that I needed Mark to leave me alone. I was hoping he wouldn’t get a new case for at least a week, the potentiality of following Wonwoo around without him knowing had me in a very good mood. Sleeping on the choices I took yesterday definitely did well, I wasn’t feeling as bad about as I was yesterday. Yes, it was still wrong what I was doing, but as long as no one got harmed, it wasn’t something very bad!
I entered the coffee shop and walked to the front desk, ordering my usual drink of choice. When it was done, I walked to a table and took a seat, it was by the window, and took a sip of the Caramel Macchiato. I watched the people who passed by and took another sip, relaxing in the chair, feeling content. The melody playing in the shop was pleasant and I bobbed my head to the rhythm. The bell chimed and I watched the beautiful girl that walked in, her hair was dark brown and wavy. She had bangs and she was tall, definitely a beauty.
You could follow her too, she’s your type. If Wonwoo backfires, you have an alternative.
I almost laughed out loud at the words whispered to me by the dark voices, feeling truly entertained. It was so easy to find someone, like I said, it could be literally anyone. If I found them attractive, nothing was stopping me from stalking them. But I shook my head, took another sip of the drink, and ignored the voices. I wouldn’t let them take full control over me. And as the beautiful girl waited at the front desk, my back straightened as a very familiar red Mercedes came into view. It was Wonwoo’s car. My heart started thumping quickly and for a second I didn’t know what do to, so I relaxed into the seat, trying to stay low-key. The beautiful girl saw my sudden reaction and she looked at me concerned, but I just smiled at her, trying to show her that I was fine. When she turned her back on me, I grabbed my phone and quickly went to the camera, snapping a picture through the window. Wonwoo couldn’t be seen, all windows of the car were tinted, but he didn’t get out. I quickly locked my phone when I heard the heels of the girl getting closer as she walked by me and I waited patiently until she was out of the shop before I sprung onto my feet. My knees accidentally knocked into the table and it took the barista off guard, I hurriedly went up to her and handed back the now empty glass, thanking her for her services. She gave me a funny look but I ignored her as I almost ran out of the coffee shop.
“Bye!” I called to her with a wave before exiting, and stopped for a second, taking a deep breath. Wonwoo’s car was still there, but I didn’t know if he was in there or not, so walking up to it would have been too risky.
Oh, here comes the fun we’ve been all missing.
My whole body was shaking in excitement as I thought of my next move, deciding to walk by the bookstore. I could peek inside and see if Wonwoo was in there or not, the windows were big enough to see everything from the outside. So, I started moving, fingers tapping against my palm anxiously, heart thumping wildly. This was always exciting, but also nerve wrecking. I had to move without being seen…or recognized. But, I was sure Wonwoo had already forgotten my face, I was just an ordinary, clumsy girl who almost spilled her coffee on him.
No, the image of your face has been forever printed into his mind, Y/N. He’s watching you, just like you are watching him.
I stopped walking, the woman behind me almost ran into me as she was taken off by my sudden lack of movement. She gave me a glare, but I ignored her. I was right in front of the bookstore and my heart was beating even faster. What did the voices mean? Does Wonwoo know that I’m stalking him? That can’t possibly be true…why would he…
Are you the only person that stalks in this world?
I shook my head and closed my eyes for a second, trying to block the voices. The thought of that creeped me out and I didn’t want to think about being possibly stalked. Then I mustered the courage and looked inside, seeing two girls at the front desk. No trace of Wonwoo, however, as I looked around the place. Not wanting to draw too much attention to myself, I walked by and rounded the corner, leaning against the red cobblestone wall. Well, if Wonwoo wasn’t inside, he must still be in his car. Which is bad, because Doyoung drove me here. I didn’t think I’d have success on my first day of keeping my eyes on him, so I didn’t find coming with a car necessary. But now, I regretted my decision. With a sigh, I took my phone in my hand and was about to search for a cab, but then I heard laughter. Deep laughter. Coming from around the corner. My heart skipped a beat as I peeked around the corner, he was standing there. Wearing light blue jeans and a turtleneck, his dark hair in his eyes and round glasses sitting high up on the bridge of his nose. I quietly exhaled, taken by the sight in front of me. Wonwoo laughed again, his voice was still deep, his laughter was short but warm. The way his lips pulled up into a huge smile it melted away the cold expression I’ve seen him have in the pictures I found of him. His eyes didn’t look as menacing anymore. Not even realizing that I was doing it, I snapped a few pictures, hopeful that I caught his smiling face. But he was with the beautiful girl, and she was touching his arm. So then does Wonwoo have a girlfriend? And it’s the beautiful girl from the coffee shop? It isn’t impossible.
You could have both…or you could get rid of one…
“Shut up!” I hissed, and quickly ducked back behind the red cobblestone wall, scared that they heard me. They were a good distance away, and there was noise on the street, but I could never be too sure. I hated the dark voices, especially when they suggested getting rid of someone. I could never do it; I didn’t want to. I would go too low, I would disappoint Doyoung so much. If I killed someone, he’d be the one putting me behind bars. I didn’t want to see the pain on his face, pain I caused for him. I didn’t want him to suffer or worry for me anymore, he’s had enough of it while we were still young kids.
The slamming of the bookstore door snapped me out of my thoughts and nervously, I peeked around the corner again, seeing Wonwoo walking away. He was headed towards his car, so I didn’t bother following him at first, but when he went past it without getting in, I grinned. He wasn’t leaving just yet, that means I can follow him around! Fixing my hair and keeping my phone in my hand for comfort, I took off after Wonwoo, keeping a safe distance between us.
And I had a very successful day. Wonwoo stayed in the neighborhood for three hours, just walking around. I snapped plenty of pictures of him, ones I would have to copy on my laptop the second I got home and delete them off my phone. He did go and had breakfast at a tiny local restaurant, which had amazing food by the way. They had some traditional cake that I haven’t eaten before, and I made a mental note to return there from time to time. Maybe with Doyoung, he’s always had a sweet tooth. Then Wonwoo went for a short walk in the park, before he went back to the bookstore. He came out with a book and then went behind the bookstore, to a playground, sat underneath a big willow tree and read. For two hours, he didn’t move from there. His hair was moved by the breeze from time to time, his lips pursed sometimes, and eyebrows furrowed every once in a while. His glasses kept falling off and he had to push them up every five minutes. I’m assuming when something was interesting or tense, he’d bite his lip or thumb, eyes running over quickly the words on the white pages. I took a picture and I was able to see the title of the book, ‘I’ll be gone in the dark’. So, he was into crime books, I looked up and smiled in his direction. He just became more and more mysterious. I was aching to know who he truly was, what he truly liked, I was yearning to hear his beautiful laughter again. And as if Wonwoo finally noticed that someone was watching him, he looked up. And he looked at me. We made eye contact, my heart started beating like crazy, my hands shook.
What will you do now Y/N? Isn’t this just thrilling?
But suddenly a tap on my knee made me jump. I looked down confused and saw a little boy grinning up at me. My eyebrows rose as I watched him; he had his hands behind his back.
“Hello?” I asked confused, glancing around to see if he was with anyone. A couple elderly people were by the entrance of the playground, chatting. He was probably with one of them.
“Hi!” The boy said shyly and I offered him a warm smile.
“Can I help you? Are you lost?” I asked him, making sure that he wasn’t here alone.
“No.” He shook his head with a chuckle, then looked down. I chuckled and looked at him confused; he was shifting his weight from one leg to another.
“You’ve been sitting here for a long time,” He suddenly said as he looked back at me, “Aren’t you cold?”
I didn’t know how to answer him, he took me off guard. What was a little boy doing, talking to a stranger?
“My jacket is thick, I’m not cold—”
“Do you like that man?” When the little boy suddenly pointed at Wonwoo, my heart jumped into my throat. I was praying he wasn’t looking my way anymore, and thankfully; he wasn’t. Actually, he was gone. Disappointment settled in and my eyebrows furrowed as I looked around, trying to spot him.
“He’s gone.” I whispered, standing up abruptly. My legs were sore, my ass actually hurt. I should have moved around, not sat there unmoving for two hours straight.
“This is for you.” The little boy chuckled and I looked back down at him; he was holding a little white flower. I took it from him confused, but he just grinned at me and then ran off. What a strange encounter that was. But after that, I went back to the bookstore, and Wonwoo’s car was gone. He had left. That meant I was done for the day, he could’ve been anywhere, and I was actually really cold. So, I called a cab and went home, changed and then went for a long run. I needed to clear my mind, block the voices that were so violently trying to dictate me my next move. I wouldn’t let them rule over me, I was the one in charge of myself and my actions.
After I got home, I showered and cooked some dinner, then I sat in the living room with the TV on as I copied all the pictures I took of Wonwoo onto my laptop. My cheeks felt warm as I looked at them again. I printed two, one where Wonwoo was smiling and one while he was sitting underneath the tree. The breeze had picked up and his hair was blown all around, he was pushing up his glasses, his lips in a tight line. The pictured offered me calmness and as I was looking at it, the front door got unlocked. Franticly, I closed my laptop and threw the two pictures into the folder I was using to store everything I had on Wonwoo. Doyoung looked tired as he walked inside and I was standing very awkwardly in the middle of the living room.
“Hi!” I called out loudly and he looked up, taken aback by my presence there.
“Uh, hi.” He greeted back, giving me a questioning look but I just giggled.
“I cooked dinner!” I tried to diffuse the awkwardness and Doyoung started grinning.
“Thank God, I didn’t have lunch today, I’m starving!” He said as he pushed his shoes off.
“It’s important to have lunch.” I said as I walked to the fridge, taking out the food I had prepared.
“Yeah, but according to Sana, so is raiding the Sky-Blue headquarters.” Doyoung said defeated and my eyebrows furrowed. Where have I heard that name before?
“Why? What’s there?” I asked curiously as Doyoung took off towards his room.
“The mafia Sana is sniffing around.” And with that he went inside his room to change and come to have dinner. But the report from Mark said that Wonwoo frequents that place often. Why? Does he maybe know there’s a mafia inside there? Or is he oblivious to it?
And you thought he was boring? Aren’t things getting more and more interesting?
“How was your day?” I slammed the plates on the table and it made Doyoung wince. I gave him an apologetic grin as I placed two forks and some napkins too next to the plates.
“Uneventful,” I said with a sigh, going to the living room to grab my stuff, “I’ll be right back, I’ll just put these in my room.”
Doyoung hummed as he took a seat at the table, placing food on his plate. I hurried to my room, clutching the file tightly to make sure it wouldn’t open and free its contents onto the floor as I carried the laptop in my other hand. I entered my room and went towards my desk, placing my laptop on top of it. The file I placed on a shelf of my bookcase and as I was about to leave I noticed how the temperature was a bit colder than in the other rooms. Looking around, I noticed my window was slightly open and with a sigh, I went and closed it and locked it. It wasn’t unlike me to forget to close it back if I happened to open it up. And just as I turned around to leave the room for good, my eyes stopped on my nightstand. Five white lilies were placed in a tall glass with water. I remained rooted to the spot, warmness spreading in my chest. It’s been long since I got flowers from someone. How did Doyoung get these in here without me noticing the flowers when he got inside the house? I chuckled and shook my head as I went to have dinner, stomach churning loudly. It felt nice to get flowers. Even if they were from my brother.
           I should have taken Mark’s offer and went on that vacation he proposed, but my mind wouldn’t let me do that. I had a new mission, and it was following Wonwoo around. For a whole week I was vigilant enough that he didn’t notice me and now I knew his habits. In the mornings, he’d take that beautiful girl to the bookstore and then go buy himself coffee. Sometimes he’d go back to that park and read for a few hours, other times he’d leave and go to the gym. He would spend a lot of time at the Sky-Blue headquarters and drive his boss to less or more sketchy places. His boss was Kim Mingyu, it crossed my mind to research him too and follow him around for a day or two, but he was giving me bad vibes. When I trailed after Wonwoo’s car when he was with Mingyu, I felt like the two knew I was there. Sometimes, they’d drive around in the same neighborhood twice and I would have to take different turns in order to make it seem like I wasn’t following them…but it almost always led me to lose them. After Wonwoo was done with his work, he’d go to the national library and spend hours there, so much, that I was starting to worry that he’d fall ill from not eating and drinking enough. In fact, he barely ate anything all day, maybe he did it somehow when I wasn’t watching, otherwise I can’t explain how he remained energetic and standing for the whole day. On the third day of watching him, I decided to enter the library myself and try and find a book that I would enjoy. He switched from the book he was reading to a different one, in fact, every day he read something different. It was confusing, and I was dying to ask him why…but the right moment hadn’t come for it yet. One day, I got so immersed in my own book that I totally forgot about keeping my eyes on Wonwoo too and when I looked up from my book, Wonwoo was gone from his usual spot. I looked around a little too frantically, my knees bouncing fast. I waited for two more minutes before I sprung up onto my feet and took off towards the section I took the book I was reading from. I heard hushed laughter coming from nearby but I was busy trying push the book back in its place, so busy, that I totally missed the deep tone of the laughter. When I finally had the book in its original place, I turned and took off pretty much running, which led me into stumbling forward as my shoes got caught in the carpet. I gasped and ran into the bookshelves in front of me, barely catching myself from falling.
“Are you alright?” A feminine voice asked, and as I turned to answer them, my heart stopped beating. The woman was standing next to Wonwoo and they were both looking at me confused and concerned. I gulped and suddenly my throat was dry as my eyes jumped from the woman to Wonwoo and then back at the woman and then again to Wonwoo. I was waiting for him to point at me and yell that I’m a psycho stalker, but he just looked confused and I quietly sighed.
“Yeah, sorry!” I said awkwardly and bowed my head quickly before turning around and running away embarrassed. It was good that Wonwoo had no recollection of my face, it means that he didn’t pay much attention to me at the Coffee Shop and he also didn’t know that I was pretty much stalking him. As much as stalking Wonwoo made my week better and definitely uplifted my mood, the highlight of my week were the daily white lilies I was finding in my room each evening. I didn’t know how Doyoung was doing it, I could swear I saw him enter empty handed each evening, but maybe he was turning into a magician and was trying his tricks out on me. I didn’t say anything to him, wanting to act oblivious to his nice act if he wouldn’t say something first. But I had my concerns regarding Wonwoo and the relationship between him and the beautiful girl from the bookstore. She worked there and seeing them each morning together gave me the impression that they were on really good terms…possibly even dating, even though I’ve only seen them hugging. So, for that, to check it myself, I had a plan. I bought a copy of the book I saw Wonwoo reading in the park and one morning, on a Tuesday when I knew Wonwoo wouldn’t be the one giving a lift to the beautiful girl, I headed inside the bookstore.
The bell chimed loudly and it was warm inside. The radio was playing through the speakers at a low volume and the girl I was here for was at the front desk. My eyes fell on her and I noticed how she hasn’t had curly hair ever since that day I saw her in the Coffee Shop. She was concentrated on her phone, smiling as she typed quickly. I cleared my throat and walked up to the front desk, leaning against it. It took her a second to realize that someone was standing there, looking at her.
“Oh, hi!” She had a powerful voice; it didn’t take one long to realize she was a confident person. I smiled at her kindly and tapped my fingers against the counter.
“Hi…” I looked around quickly, feigning nervousness, “I’m sorry to bother you here…”
Then I looked at her name tag and read her name, “Hyemi, pretty name! Anyways…uhm, this book…”
I grabbed it out of my bag and placed it on top of the counter, “Wonwoo borrowed it to me and well…I’ve had it for too long and I want to return it.”
“Oh, you know Wonwoo?” Hyemi’s eyebrows rose as she took the book from me and looked at it, “I’ve seen this one laying around in his house.”
Oh, so she knows where Wonwoo lives. And she was there too. You knew this was coming, Y/N, but are you ready to face the consequences? What if you have to give up both? You can always get rid of one of them…you know it’s not hard…
“I’ve met him at the library, sometimes we talk,” I said with a shrug and took the book back from Hyemi, “he recommended it to me.”
I was hoping she didn’t see the tightness of my jaw as I tried to ignore the evil voices. They were urging me to grab the girl by the hair and drag her away. I couldn’t do that; I wasn’t like that anymore. And nothing was sure yet. They can be friends; friends hang out together in their apartments all the time. I can’t jump to conclusions just yet. And I’ve never seen Wonwoo spend time with her except for when he drops Hyemi off in the mornings.
“He really likes doing that!” Hyemi said with a roll of her eyes and I chuckled, putting the book away.
“He does, but it’s fine, I don’t mind.” She hummed and we looked behind her when there was a click. Another breathtakingly beautiful woman walked into the room and I couldn’t help but gape at her. Her lips were red and her long brown hair was in a low ponytail, eyeliner on her eyelids. She looked amazing, I cleared my throat and quickly read her name tag. Irene.
“Everything alright?” She asked with authority in her voice and I found myself nodding very quickly, but Hyemi just chuckled.
“Yes, I was just talking to—” Then both women looked at me and I was lost for a second, feeling flustered. My fingers tapped against the counter quickly and I realized they were waiting for me to tell them my name.
“Y/N!” I exclaimed and my cheeks became warm, “Uhm, my name is Y/N.”
“Wonwoo borrowed Y/N a book and she wants to return it.” Hyemi said with a smile and Irene hummed, looking me over quickly. Then she offered me a small smile and her stern expression melted away. It eased my nerves a little and I offered her a similar smile.
“Right, so…could you give me his address?” I asked, very innocently, as I looked Hyemi in the eyes. She knows where Wonwoo lives, I’m a little bothered by that but at least now I’ll find out his address too. But her eyebrows furrowed and she looked at me apologetically.
“Sorry, I don’t think I should just tell you that…without Wonwoo’s consent at least—”
“Oh, right!” I exclaimed and looked down embarrassed, “That was really…a dumb request, don’t worry! I totally get it!”
“Not to be mean—”
“No! It’s fine, you’re right!” I waved my hands in the air and Irene chuckled as she watched the exchange between us. I took a step back and played with my fingers as I tried to keep on an embarrassed expression.
“I’ll give it back to him when I meet him at the library.”
“Are you sure? You could give it to me and I’ll—”
“I’m sure.” I interrupted Hyemi and walked backwards towards the door, “Have a nice day, ladies!”
“You too!” Irene called out as Hyemi’s eyebrows furrowed a little bit.
“Bye.” She muttered as I hurried out the door, heart beating fast. What if she realized I was lying? Now all I could hope for was that she wouldn’t tell Wonwoo and throw me off from the progress I’ve been making.
And that day when I arrived home, I found more white lilies sitting on the little table that we had on the front porch. I took them and inhaled their scent, a smile appearing on my lips. And as a breeze passed by, I felt eyes on me. So, I straightened up and looked around, but the fence was high enough that no one would see inside, so I shook the feeling off and unlocked the front door, walking inside the house and headed to the kitchen to take a vase for the new lilies.
Tumblr media
           A few days passed since I’ve been to the bookstore and I had realized that I needed a different approach. Yesterday, Hyemi and Wonwoo didn’t show up to the bookstore and as I went on with my day, I found Wonwoo nowhere he’d usually be at. I didn’t want to jump to conclusions, so, I figured they must have taken a day off. But that thought didn’t sit well with me, so, I decided that it was time I took serious actions. A more straightforward approach. One that would set off the start of something between Wonwoo and I.
I woke up a little earlier than I usually would to be able to get ready. We had only one bathroom, and for once, I put a little effort into my appearance. I usually didn’t doll myself up, but today I wanted to look pretty. So, I put on minimal makeup and decided to be a bit bold and use red lipstick too. I pulled my hair out of my face and clipped the front strands back and then I cooked breakfast for Doyoung and I, wanting to surprise him. He was always the one that got up early and made sure we ate well, but I felt like returning this little favor to him since he’s been bringing me white lilies for almost two weeks now. I even turned his morning alarm off, wanting to give him a little extra time to sleep, which was always welcomed as he worked late and had to wake up really early. After breakfast was ready, I went back to my room to get dressed and spent at least ten minutes thinking of an outfit. In the end, I settled on high waist mom jeans and a long-sleeved colorful crop top as yesterday it was rather warm. Then, I grabbed my bag and went to Doyoung’s room to wake him up. He was in a good mood once I told him I cooked breakfast and that I let him sleep in, his laughter echoed in the house as he told me a funny story that happened at work. Breakfast was pleasant and tasty and once we were done, I didn’t wait for Doyoung, I headed out. I told him that I found a new path in the forest that lead to a beautiful clearing with a spring and that I wanted to take pictures while the sun wasn’t high up in the sky, which unfortunately was a lie. I did find a place like that, but it was last month and I had already taken plenty of pictures of it. But Doyoung didn’t have to know that I was back to stalking again, especially not today, when I was so excited about my plan. Before going to the library, I grabbed a cup of coffee, Americano this time as I didn’t have in mind drinking it and it would’ve been a waste to buy Caramel Macchiato. By the time I got to the library it was nearing noon and I was hopeful that wherever Wonwoo went, he’d be back by today, otherwise, I did all of this for nothing. When I entered, the librarian gave me a glance and her eyebrows furrowed as they fell on my coffee, but I hid it behind my back and offered her a warm smile. She shook her head but didn’t say anything and I bowed my head, hurrying further inside. The coffee wasn’t hot anymore, but it was still warm, at least it wouldn’t burn him. I cleared my throat and took in a deep breath, about to round the corner and head to the reading area. My heart was pounding quickly in my chest and I feared that others would be able to hear it in the calming silence of the library. But as I rounded the corner, my mind went blank.
There he is.
I could feel excitement enter my whole body and my fingers started tapping quickly against the cup of coffee I was holding, I had to force myself to stay as still as I could and not take off towards Wonwoo. He was sitting at his usual spot, in the middle of the area and at the edge of the table. He had a book on the table in front of him, his glasses were close to falling off and his black hair was a bit messy. He was wearing a black t-shirt and a silver necklace hung around his neck. My eyes got glued to his muscly arms as he flipped the page and I gulped, trying to focus on my plan once again.
He is a sight for sore eyes, isn’t he, Y/N? No surprise you can’t handle the thought of someone else having him.
I shook my head a little and then started walking. My heels clicked against the wooden floor, but it was a dull sound, and thankfully Wonwoo didn’t look up. His eyebrows were furrowed as his eyes ran over the words in the book, and he sighed loudly as I got closer and closer. I glanced around, but there weren’t many people, and those who were, they were too busy studying or reading. Knowing that no one was looking my way, I knew what I was about to do wouldn’t look suspicious to anyone. I was two tables away from Wonwoo, and as I was watching him so closely, I noticed the sudden tensity of his muscles. How his palms clenched into fists and it almost looked like he was reading the same thing over and over, but I wouldn’t be actually able to tell that. My plan was to accidentally run into the corner of the table he was sitting at and spill the coffee on him. Like that, I had an excuse to talk to him and hopefully he’d even agree to me buying him a new shirt. I wasn’t able to decipher his personality as he was mostly by himself, but I prayed to every God out there that he’d comply to my wishes. And just as my eyes fixated on the corner of the table, to make sure that the front of my shoe would get stuck in it, Wonwoo abruptly stood up. And I jumped and panicked. The sound his chair made was loud and I lost all train of thought as his eyes fell on me and the heel of my shoe got stuck in the edge of the carpet. And suddenly, I was falling forward, eyes widened in horror. Wonwoo didn’t even blink, he just stood there, looking almost taken aback. And then our bodies collided into each other, and I felt the warm coffee spill not just on his chest, but on my own too. I gasped loudly, Wonwoo remained silent and suddenly I felt the eyes of the people who were around us, on us. Wonwoo was tense as he quickly gripped my forearms to steady me, the empty cup of coffee fell against the ground and I felt like it made the loudest sound I have ever heard. But in reality, it barely even made a thudding sound. My eyes remained wide, heart beating fast as I remained rooted in Wonwoo’s arms.
He smells so good. And his body is so firm. Do you hear how loud his breathing is, Y/N?
The evil voice made me shiver and I sprung out of Wonwoo’s hold, looking at him wide eyed. He looked frozen for a second, but then he lowered his arms, and gulped, glancing down at his damp t-shirt.
“Oh my God,” I muttered, looking down at my own damp shirt, this didn’t go as planned, he was the only one supposed to get coffee spilled on, “I am so sorry!”
My voice was quiet as I tried not to disturb the other people in there and Wonwoo finally looked at me. His sharp eyes offered no warmness and suddenly I felt small under his intense gaze. I felt embarrassed and as if I was caught in the act, but it’s him who stood up. This was supposed to happen differently.
“At least it wasn’t burning hot.” Wonwoo’s deep voice reached my ears and I did everything I could to memorize the deep vibration of it.
“Yeah, I got it a while ago…” I mumbled and looked down embarrassed, unable to maintain his intense eye contact.
“Accidents happen,” I could see him shrug as he ran his hands down his abdomen, “And it’s my fault, I was the one who stood up so abruptly—”
“Oh, no—” I looked up and shook my hands quickly, “I shouldn’t have walked so close to the table, it’s really my fault—”
“Don’t worry about it,” His lips pulled into a small smirk and I knew I was going to blush, “I’m not mad at you.”
My cheeks were hot and I felt at a loss of words all of a sudden, almost forgetting why I even planned on doing this.
“I feel guilty though—” I managed to get out, trying to avoid looking at his lips, “Let me make up for it!”
Someone towards the back of the reading area cleared their throat and I realized I was starting to speak too loudly; my leg was tapping against the wooden floor anxiously. I wanted to insist, but I didn’t know what to say next. I needed Wonwoo to co-operate, but I wasn’t sure he would just yet. His expression didn’t give away anything and I bit my lower lip nervously.
“How can you make up for it?” His eyebrows rose and my heart jumped in my chest.
“Uhm, I—I can just, uh—buy you a new shirt?” I hated myself for stuttering, but this was more nerve wrecking than I remembered it being. Has it been really that long since I’ve done this?
“I have plenty of shirts…” Wonwoo’s deep voice made me look back at him and I tried to stay calm. I couldn’t decipher his expression, but he looked like he was teasing me. I smiled softly and played with my fingers, glancing away from him before looking back.
“The mall is literally across the road…and…if you let me buy you this shirt, you’ll never forget that a stranger spilled their coffee on you on a very nice Wednesday…” Suddenly, all tension left my body when a wide smile appeared on Wonwoo’s lips. For the first time, I noticed how his nose scrunched up when he smiled, and how soft he seemed like this. When Wonwoo smiled, he wasn’t intimidating anymore, it was as if I was looking at a different person. My heart started beating quickly again and I felt at peace as I gaped at him, hopeful that he didn’t find it creepy. If only he knew…
“You might need a new shirt as well…” Wonwoo said once he was done laughing and I looked down at my shirt, eyebrows furrowing. Well yeah…that wasn’t part of the plan.
“If you insist.” I said with a shrug and Wonwoo chuckled, shaking his head.
“I’ll put this book back and then we can go.” Wonwoo said as he closed the book he was reading and picked it up from the table. He gave me a glance before he turned and walked towards the tall bookshelves, disappearing between them. I bit my lower lip, trying to contain my victorious smirk in case Wonwoo returned. I remembered the abandoned cup and turned around to pick it up, chuckling to myself. My plan didn’t work, but worked at the same time. It played out a little different than what I had in mind, but in the end, I still got what I wanted.
“Let’s go?” I turned my head and Wonwoo was by my side, eyebrows raised as his eyes fell on the empty cup. I nodded my head and we took off towards the mall from across the road, about to buy some new shirts.
Once we got to the mall I made Wonwoo choose a shop he likes and I’d buy him a t-shirt from there, only if he likes it, of course. In the end, he lead us to the cheapest shop and said that I should choose something for myself as well and he’ll buy it, because it was his fault too that the coffee was spilled as he got in my way. When he pointed towards the shop and said that he wanted to choose from that one, I gave him a look.
“Are you sure?” I asked as I followed after him, “Because I might look poor, but I’m not. So, if you want to wear something fancy, I totally can get it for you—”
“I don’t need anything fancy.” Wonwoo interrupted with a chuckle and I shrugged, walking inside the shop.
“Well, good for you then.” I muttered, looking around. To the left was the men section and to the right the women section, I pointed towards the men section, “Let’s go.”
Without thinking, I grabbed his wrist and noticed how warm his skin was against mine. I didn’t realize it was inappropriate to hold someone you just met, let alone drag him after you. But I was too happy that my plan actually worked out and that he didn’t recognize me at all. Even though he’s seen me twice before.
What if you aren’t remarkable enough? You could get Hyemi instead of Wonwoo, since he doesn’t even remember your face.
I shook my head and stopped in front of racks of various colored t-shirt and simple shirts, “Well, choose one!”
Wonwoo came to stand next to me and his eyebrows furrowed a little bit as he started moving the racks with his left hand. My right leg was tapping against the ground as I looked at his profile. His jaw was sharp and lips jutting out as he tried to choose one. Suddenly, I became aware of the hold I had on his wrist still and released it, clearing my throat awkwardly. I crossed my arms in front of my chest and looked ahead when Wonwoo glanced at me. I could feel my cheeks burning in embarrassment, but from the corner of my eyes I could see him smirking. It made my leg tap faster against the floor and I wished that something would happen that would save me from the embarrassment I was currently feeling.
“This one will do.” He suddenly spoke up, as if he could read my thoughts, and I turned to look at him. He was holding an almost identic t-shirt to the one he was wearing, except this one had longer sleeves. My eyes lingered on it before I gave him an affirming nod, and Wonwoo smiled.
“Your turn.” This time, he grabbed my wrist and started pulling me towards the women section. My heart suddenly picked up its pace and my free hand turned into a fist as I tried to contain my wide grin once again. His grip felt like it was on fire and burned away on my skin, but I was enjoying it, it was a nice feeling. He released me though the second we got to the shirts and I didn’t even look, just picked up a brown see through shirt.
“This one!” I exclaimed and grinned at Wonwoo, holding up the shirt. His eyes fell on it and his eyebrows furrowed.
“Are you sure?” He asked and I could almost hear a certain discomfort in his tone, but I thought I was just making things up. So, I just nodded my head with a wide smile and Wonwoo sighed, pointing towards the changing rooms.
“Let’s change then.”
“Shouldn’t we pay first?” I asked surprised as Wonwoo took off.
“No, take the tag off, we can still pay.” My eyebrows furrowed at Wonwoo’s words but I didn’t say anything as I went inside a cabin and quickly changed into the shirt I picked. Once I was dressed, I gulped. Well, I certainly should have looked first at what I was picking out, you could see my black bra through the material. And it was a bit too thin for this weather, but if we stayed inside the mall for longer I wouldn’t be bothered. And my car was around the corner, hopefully I wouldn’t catch a cold. I pulled the curtain back and my eyes fell on Wonwoo who was leaning against the wall casually. He was wearing black jeans and black combat boots. The t-shirt he picked was tight around his chest and I couldn’t look away. It was a mouthwatering sight and I gulped, snapping out of it. But the silence stretched on for longer as Wonwoo continued looking at me with an unreadable expression, jaw just a little tight. He kept his eyes on my face, but I didn’t miss the split second they lowered towards my see-through shirt. It made me fidget as I cleared my throat.
“Let’s—let’s pay!” I quickly hurried past Wonwoo, feeling embarrassed for the nth time today. I could hear a deep chuckle behind me, but I ignored it and approached the front desk.
“Hi, we bought these two shirts we are wearing, the tags are here—” I started speaking as I placed the tags on the counter.
“I’m sorry Miss, that’s against the rules.” The cashier very rudely interrupted and gave me a glare.
“Uhm…we still intend to pay though…”
“It’s still against the rules to do that, I have to call security—”
“Maybe you should just scan the tags and proceed on with your life, Kelly.” Wonwoo’s deep voice boomed next to me and I looked at him, his jaw was clenched and he was glaring at the cashier, whose name was Kelly. She seemed to shrink a little under Wonwoo’s gaze and she hesitated for a second, but then scanned in the tags.
“We are paying separately.” Wonwoo proceeded to say when he saw that she put the shirts on the same bill and Kelly apologized quickly. I looked at Wonwoo, eyebrows furrowed at the sudden change in his attitude. He looked stern and demanding, I probably would’ve done instantly what he told me, if he looked at me like that. This is how I imagined Wonwoo’s personality to be like, yet it didn’t sit well with me. Something felt off about his attitude, this wasn’t the first time he was being like this. And it was very obvious that he knew what effect it would have on the one targeted.
“Here.” The girl muttered once she handed Wonwoo the change back and then it was my turn to pay, which went by quickly as both of us were trying to move quickly under Wonwoo’s scrutinizing gaze.
“Uh, bye!” I called out as Wonwoo and I walked out with a bag each and our stained shirts inside them. I stopped walking once we were out of the shop and Wonwoo stopped too, looking back at me confused.
“Something wrong?” He asked confused and I shook my head.
“Not at all…I’m just glad we are even now…” I shrugged and he nodded with a hum, looking around. I tried to shrug off the sudden uncertainty I was feeling. Wonwoo didn’t seem as safe anymore as I had imagined him to be.
“Do you want to grab some lunch?” My heart jumped into my throat instantly and my mind went blank. How do I answer that question? That was definitely not what I had planned, but it was turning even better. But I couldn’t, I felt like it would be too much. Yes, I wanted to get to know him, but I already felt like an intruder. This happened only because of me, I didn’t want Wonwoo to feel like he had to do this. And I wanted to sort out my thought first and analyze our interaction.
“I would love to, but I have to help out my brother.” I lied through my teeth, with a smile on my face.
“Ah…” He nodded and neared me, I felt small under his strong gaze. It looked like he was looking right into my soul, reading my mind. It gave me the impression that he knew I was lying, “You don’t have to feel guilty for spilling the coffee on me, I told you, accidents happen.”
“I know!” I laughed nervously, my leg tapping against the ground once again, “I feel like I should wash that t-shirt…to actually stop feeling guilty…”
And that was the second stage of my plan. Get him to give me his t-shirt so that I can wash it, that way I get his phone number and I have an excuse to meet up with him again. Wonwoo’s eyebrows rose at my words and he chuckled, reaching inside his bag for without saying anything.
“Here.” He said and handed me his stained t-shirt.
“Really?” I asked gaping and he chuckled as I took it from him, “I thought you’d be against it…”
“I’m not,” He said with a casual shrug and then fished his phone out of his pocket, “I’ll need your number in order to get back my t-shirt…unless you’re a t-shirt thief.”
I started laughing as I took his unlocked phone and typed in my phone number, trying to hide the tremble of my fingers, “Shhh, no one knows.”
I winked as I handed him back his phone with my number saved and Wonwoo chuckled, ringing me. That way I had his number too, which I would save the second I got to my car. And then, he took another step and I was taken aback by the closeness between us.
“Tell me…” He muttered, his voice deep and I gulped nervously, “Have we met before?”
He knows, Y/N.
I froze up for a second, looking at him with my jaw having fallen open, “What? I—I don’t think—where—You know, maybe at the library—No! We have never met before!”
I knew I fucked up with my stuttering and the way Wonwoo suddenly started smirking like he was proud of himself for making me react like that. Maybe he really does know and the voices aren’t wrong.
“You go to the library often?”
“Lately, yeah.” I cleared my throat and stepped back, acting like I was looking at the shop behind Wonwoo.
“I see.” He nodded and then stepped back too, holding his hand out, “We haven’t introduced ourselves, I’m Wonwoo.”
My eyebrows rose as I realized we really didn’t, even though I already knew his name. Thank God it didn’t slip from my lips, that would’ve been really bad.
“I’m Y/N, nice to meet you!” I smiled at him widely and shook his head excited, trying to ignore how hot his hand was once again. His grip was firm and I decided to ignore how our hands touched for a little bit longer than they were supposed to.
“Nice to meet you too.” Wonwoo chuckled and we let go of each other’s hands finally.
“I have to go now…” I pointed behind me and Wonwoo gave me a nod and a small wave, “Bye!”
“See you soon, Y/N.” I shivered at how low his tone got and quickly hurried away, feeling embarrassed, excited, nervous and confused by the vibes he was giving me. Why is it that I feel like there’s something going on with him?
           I was eager to get home after the day I had, ready to get lost in my thoughts and analyze every little detail about the exchange between Wonwoo and I. I even considered texting him, but I didn’t want to come off as creepy, or give him the wrong impression. If I wanted things to work out, I had to be smooth and careful about everything I said and did. As I parked my car in its usual place, I noticed how the lights were on inside the house and realized Doyoung was already home. Doyoung was home early! I quickly got out of the car and locked it, almost running to get inside the house faster. It was rare that Doyoung was home before nightfall and I missed spending time with him and going out with him. We haven’t gone on a run together in a long time and I was hoping that Doyoung was up to it. I knocked on the front door first to let Doyoung know that it was me, and then pushed the door open and walked inside.
“Doyoung!” I shrieked, seeing that he wasn’t in the living room nor kitchen, “Hi!”
Doyoung didn’t answer right away and as I closed the door behind me and locked it, I heard the water running in the bathroom. Doyoung was washing up, so I walked to my room and changed out of my clothes and wore something comfortable. I quickly removed my makeup and sighed as I pulled my hair in a low bun, feeling at ease once again. I opened my window to let in some fresh air and as I was about to walk away, I noticed the white lilies on the windowsill. I chuckled at Doyoung’s creativeness and picked them up, taking them inside with me. It was smart of him, to be honest. He parked his car behind the backyard, where the wall of my bedroom was too. So, in order to get to the front of the house he’d have to pass by my windows and that would explain how he was able to sneak in the flowers inside my room without me seeing them. But as I held the lilies, I realized that there were ten pieces this time and I bit my lower lip as a wide smile spread onto my lips. I glanced at the bag that contained the shirts that got coffee spilled on them and I walked up to it, grabbing Wonwoo’s t-shirt. I took it in my hands and, having placed the lilies on my bed, and felt the soft fabric of the black t-shirt. It was bigger than my own torso as I held it against my frame and chuckled as I walked towards my mirror. So that’s what I would look like wearing Wonwoo’s shirts.
You look lovely, Y/N, we bet Wonwoo can’t wait to see you like this. If you proceed carefully, he’ll be yours in a blink of an eye.
I chuckled, letting the image the voices created linger in my mind. I brought the t-shirt up against my nose and reveled in Wonwoo’s cologne. It was masculine and it carried a musky scent and something that I have only felt on Doyoung, the smell of gunpowder. My eyebrows furrowed as I looked at the t-shirt, lowering it back inside the bag. Why would Wonwoo’s t-shirt smell like gunpowder? Does he go to the shooting ranges? Is it a hobby of his? No, if it was, I would’ve known already. But before I could dwell on it longer, the bathroom door closed and I jumped, taking the white lilies as I left my room.
“Y/N, are you home—”
“Doyoung!” I exclaimed and threw my arms around my brother, giving him a back hug. Doyoung chuckled and tapped my arms, softly peeling them off himself.
“I wasn’t expecting you to be home so early!” I said as I walked around him, wandering if we had any free vases for the lilies.
“I wasn’t either…” Doyoung muttered and I heard him sigh as I opened some cabinets until I found a blue vase. I smiled in victory and filled it with water, placing the lilies inside before putting the vase in the middle of the dining table. Doyoung was lounging on the couch with a frown on his face and as I looked at him, about to rant about my day, I realized something was wrong. He looked drained; his eyes even looked red.
“Doyoung…” I muttered with a frown and approached him slowly, arms hugging around my torso, “Are you okay?”
He looked up at me and tried to put on a smile, “Yeah! I’m fine—”
But his voice broke a little and I quickly sat next to him, throwing my arms around him as I pulled him into a tight hug.
“Hey, talk to me.” I whispered as I rubbed his back reassuringly. His arms went around me and he sighed loudly, sniffing.
“Well…I was sent home early because the higher ups are in meetings…” He sighed again and I just hummed as I waited patiently for him to continue.
“Sana was found dead this morning—” His voice broke again and I froze. Doyoung’s boss was dead? Who could have done such thing? And why?
“Oh, Doyoung, I’m so sorry…” I whispered, tightening my hold around him. He nodded his head and then rested his cheek against my shoulder. We remained silent as I tried offering comfort to my brother, knowing how much Sana’s death affected him. Not many liked Sana, sometimes even Doyoung hated her, but they spent a lot of time together. And inevitably they bonded, she still meant something to him.
“She was shot in the head once, it killed her instantly—” I wanted to tell him to stop thinking about it, to not tell me anything about her death, but he had to get it off his chest. And I was there to listen, I would always be there for Doyoung, no matter what he needed.
“There were signs of other altercations before her death…” Then he stopped for a second and scoffed, “She attacked a girl, Y/N, a simple, innocent, girl. She just—broke inside her apartment, trashed it and—and tried killing her? I don’t understand—”
“People do all sorts of things,” I interrupted Doyoung’s rambling, “You can never truly know what a person is capable of until it’s done.”
Doyoung sniffed again and then gently pulled back, rubbing his eyes. I let my hands rest in my lap as I watched my brother trying to pull himself together.
“She did it because of a guy—I don’t understand. She was obsessed with this—Kim Mingyu and she attacked Hyemi for being with him, I—” Doyoung shrugged and fell back against the couch, looking up at the white ceiling. My eyebrows furrowed as I watched my brother. Kim Mingyu? It’s the guy Wonwoo works for. Wait…does Wonwoo know anything about this? Why was he missing yesterday? Hyemi…it can’t be the girl from the bookstore, right?
“Is Hyemi alright?” I found myself asking quietly and Doyoung hummed.
“Her friends found her just in time, before she could get hurt seriously. But Sana…”
“She got what she deserved.” I couldn’t hold my words back and Doyoung’s head snapped in my direction, “She tried to kill Hyemi, Doyoung. And she was a cop. Attacked a simple civilian. I understand your pain and struggle but—”
“I know,” Doyoung offered me a reassuring smile and patted my hand, “but it’s very stressful. They want me to replace Sana.”
My eyes widened as I sat up straighter, “Wait…you’ll become head of police then…?”
Doyoung’s lips formed a thin line and he sighed, looking away from me, “I guess Kim Mingyu really does achieve whatever he wants…”
“Kim Mingyu?” My eyebrows furrowed as I looked at Doyoung once again confused hearing his name, “What does he have to do with this?”
“Nothing, don’t worry about that.” Doyoung quickly said and ran his fingers through his damp hair, “I just wanted to be the first one to tell you all of this, and not Mark.”
Before I could press more about who Kim Mingyu was, I froze and looked at Doyoung surprised, “Mark?”
“Yeah,” Doyoung gave me a small glare and it seemed like he was quick to repress the feelings towards Sana’s death, “I know about what you do with Mark.”
“I don’t do anything,” I shrugged defensively, “I don’t even know who that is!”
Doyoung scoffed and crossed his arms in front of his chest, “Please, you think people didn’t notice Mark’s sudden success this year? Everyone knew he was close to getting fired, until he suddenly turned into this super detective he never was—”
“And how is that my fault?!” I exclaimed, unable to keep it inside anymore. My legs were bouncing quickly and I gave Doyoung a glare, “I wanted to help. I wanted to do something else besides running my blog and taking pictures of nature, alright? This is fun and exciting—”
“And fucking dangerous, Y/N!” Doyoung exclaimed, standing up as his eyebrows furrowed, “Do you have any idea who you even follow around? Gang leaders, mafia heads, powerful business men! These people are shady! If you were ever caught, I wouldn’t have been able to do anything—”
“I know!” I exclaimed and stood up too, feeling desperate for Doyoung to understand me, “But this helped! It really did, Mark offered me an escape, Doyoung. An escape from falling back into my old habits and stalking people. Ever since I started doing this, I—I had no tendencies to stalk others—” Besides the sudden infatuation I had with Wonwoo, but it would pass. I hoped that it would. I wanted Doyoung to be proud of me.
“You just need a good therapist, Y/N—” Doyoung’s words were triggering as my parents would say this often to me and I couldn’t control myself, I shoved him back. He stumbled a bit, taken aback by my sudden outburst. Until he realized what he said, and he turned pale.
“Thanks a lot, big brother.” I snapped and turned around, storming towards my room, “You know therapists did shit and never helped me! The medication only made feel worse after a while!”
“I didn’t mean to say that, I’m sorry—” Doyoung tried to apologize as he followed after me.
“Save it, okay?!” I entered my room and blocked Doyoung from coming inside, “I—I know I’m a burden to you. I hate being a burden. But I can’t live on my own, and I hate that. I want to offer you a normal life, but instead, I’m just hanging on your neck—and I don’t need you to remind me that!”
“That’s not true!” Doyoung looked offended by my words as his eyebrows furrowed, “You were never a burden to me. I love you and I want you with me, Y/N—”
I raised my palm to stop him from talking, “Stop, I don’t care. Thankfully, helping Mark out pays well and I’m close to having enough money to move out. Give me three more months, and I’ll be gone.”
“What?!” Doyoung’s face fell and he went to grab me, but I slammed the door shut quickly, “I don’t want you to leave! We moved in here together because we both wanted to! You can’t just leave—”
“Watch me!” I screamed and I heard Doyoung sigh loudly as I crossed my arms in front of my chest. This wasn’t the time to act childish nor to drop something like that on him, not when his boss just died and he was in grief. But I couldn’t help it, he pissed me off. He would never understand what I had to go through daily and therefore he had no rights to try and tell me what to do. What Mark offered me was a life saver and Doyoung would never understand how much it helped, right up until I met Wonwoo.
“Y/N, I’m sorry.” Doyoung said loudly and knocked on my door, but I quickly locked it. I knew he was sorry and he didn’t want to hurt me, but I needed time to get over his words. By tomorrow morning I would be fine, but I needed to be left alone tonight.
“Whatever!” I called out and rolled my eyes, “Don’t bring me any white lilies anymore!”
I waited for an answer but Doyoung remained silent and I really wanted to see his expression, was he mad that I told him that?
“What?” My eyebrows furrowed at his confused tone, “You’re the one who buys them daily—”
The rest of his words got swallowed by my loudness. My heart started thumping wildly as I unlocked the bedroom’s door in a hurry and threw it open, “What?!”
Doyoung’s eyebrows were furrowed too as we looked at each other confused, “You…aren’t the one buying the lilies?”
“And it’s not you who’s been giving them to me?” Doyoung and I seemed to realize what this meant at the same time and as I scampered to shut the window of my room closed and lock it, Doyoung hurried to take on some shoes as he turned on the lights outside around the house. He threw on a jacket and hurried outside as I remained shivering in the middle of the room. Goosebumps covered my skin as I remained staring at the flowers on my nightstand that I got yesterday. Who was giving me these flowers then? And why was this person breaking inside our house?
Aw, does our little Y/N have a secret admirer? Who could it be?
“No!” I shook my head and hurriedly shut all blinds in my room and then went around the house, shutting each one of them. Doyoung came inside looking distressed and ran a hand through his hair.
“I’ll talk to the boys, and they’ll start patrolling around the neighborhood. Tomorrow a search team will come and search the house for any foreign DNA, alright?” Doyoung spoke with a serious tone as he locked the front door and turned to look at me, “Nothing will happen, alright?”
“They have been breaking in for two weeks, Doyoung—” I bit my lower lip and started tapping my leg against the floor anxiously, “Do they want something from me?”
Doyoung walked up to me and held onto my shoulders, “We’ll catch them before they can do anything, yes?”
I sighed and nodded my head, looking around the house to see the white lilies everywhere. They made me feel sick to my stomach, so I walked past Doyoung to take the trash bin and started throwing all of them inside it, cursing under my breath. I should have known that it wasn’t Doyoung. I’m so stupid!
Tumblr media
           Sleeping was hard last night and after struggling for a while, I somehow fell asleep towards the morning hours. I didn’t have the energy to go and watch Wonwoo today, I was too paranoid to even wear headphones on my run. I kept glancing behind me, until I noticed the police car parked around the curb and two of Doyoung’s colleagues chatting as they had coffee in their hands. I quickly greeted them before running past them, deciding to change my running route out of fear that if someone indeed was watching would already know I would head that way and do something to me. Doyoung kept messaging me every half an hour and I got irritated so I told him to just watch the app where it showed him my location, and at least that made him stop. I was halfway down the path when my phone started buzzing in my back pocket, tickling my butt cheek. I stopped running and unzipped the pocket, taking my phone in my hand. My lungs were screaming for air and I had sweat a lot as I pushed myself in order to try and forget the whole stalker deal. But when my eyes fell on the caller ID, I felt excited.
“I hope you went on that vacation and enjoyed yourself,” Came Mark’s voice through the phone and I chuckled, still trying to catch my breath, “Because I’ve got a new job for you.”
I hummed and breathed loudly, waiting for Mark to continue.
“Am I…interrupting something?” His voice was hesitant and it made me laugh.
“Yeah, my run.” Mark chuckled and I turned around, walking back towards the house, “Tell me everything.”
“It’s a one-day job, but it’s very important. The names are Wen Junhui and Xu Minghao. I’ll send you the details in a message on your other number, delete it once you had it memorized.”
“What exactly will I have to look out for?” I wondered as I passed by the police car again, the officers were gone this time.
“Those two are planning a heist, just take pictures of each jewelry place they go inside and send them to me straight when you think it’s clear.” I pursed my lips and thought a little.
“Fine, but don’t say a word to Doyoung. He knows about us and he’s very mad.”
“I know,” Mark cleared his throat, sounding awkward, “He very much wants to fire me right now. Maybe you heard, but Sana is dead, so he’s the big boss now…”
“I know,” I muttered and walked down the street, looking around before crossing onto the other side, “Doyoung told me. Seems like she was nuts or something…”
“She had it coming,” Mark scoffed and it peaked my interest, “Anyone who works against or turns on Kim Mingyu ends up being dead.”
My eyebrows furrowed and I was about to ask who this man was, but Mark gasped, “Shit, your brother is coming—keep your eyes on your phone!”
He hung up and I sighed as I locked my phone, wondering if I would find anything about Kim Mingyu on the internet. Since Wonwoo worked for him, I’ve seen him a few times, his business seemed pretty serious. Lost in thought, I didn’t notice the guy approaching me and gasped when their shoulder collided with mine. I hissed and stopped, turning around to shout at them, but the person didn’t even acknowledge me.
“Asshole!” I shouted after them, noticing their hunched form. The person seemed tall and looked like he was trying to hide his actual height. I turned to walk when the scent hit me. Musk and gunpowder. I quickly turned around, but the man in the black clothes was already gone.
Was that your secret admirer?
I shivered and quickly ran the rest of the way home, only being around the corner. I quickly unlocked the gate and as I walked inside, my eyes fell on the white lilies that I threw in the dumpster this morning. I felt bad for them because they were very beautiful, but I didn’t want them inside the house anymore.
After showering and getting ready, I checked out Mark’s message and memorized the information quickly, deleting the message. I grabbed my laptop and put it inside my bag together with my camera as I pulled on my tennis shoes and left the house, locking everything after me. I had an hour until the targets would show up to the city center to check out all shops, so I decided to take a walk there, try to use up the energy that didn’t go away while I was running due to it being cut short. I let Doyoung know that I was going out and to an agglomerated area, so that he didn’t have to worry, besides he had the tracker on. I snapped a few pictures as I walked and reveled in the silence around me as I took the back streets, where less people walked. I wondered what Wonwoo was doing, and suddenly I felt bad that I didn’t follow him around today. He’d be at his work place right now, having already been to the gym earlier this morning after he dropped Hyemi off at work and bought his coffee. What was interesting about Wonwoo was that each time he ordered coffee, he bought something different. My phone dinged as I turned onto the main street, getting lost in the crowd of people as I opened my phone and almost shrieked when I saw whom the message was from.
From Wonwoo: Hey…I hope I’m not bothering you…I was just wondering when we could meet up? You know…to give me back my t-shirt.
I struggled for a second to hold the phone in both hands and also not walk into others as I typed back.
To Wonwoo: Hi! You’re not bothering me at all! I washed it this morning…so if the weather is nice, it’ll be totally dry by tomorrow! Is tomorrow good for you?
I was about to put my phone away, but Wonwoo started typing back instantly and soon came his answer.
From Wonwoo: I can’t tomorrow, I won’t be in town and will only get back late. The next day…is it good for you?
I looked around me, noticing that I was in the area Mark instructed me to. I noticed the first jewelry shop and found a bench right across from it, so I hurried to take a seat there.
To Wonwoo: Sure, at noon? We can have lunch, since I turned it down last time…
My heart was pounding in my chest as I waited for Wonwoo’s answer, which seemed to take ages, and in fact only took a few seconds.
From Wonwoo: Fine, but let’s go to a restaurant. The food is better than the one at the mall.
He wasn’t wrong, besides this was sounding an awful lot like a date. I giggled and looked around before typing back.
To Wonwoo: Tell me the location and time?
From Wonwoo: 1 o’clock, but I’ll pick you up. Give me your address.
I hesitated for a second, knowing better not to give away my address to a complete stranger. My parents warned me about bad people, and so did Doyoung numerous times…especially since he became a cop and had to work on many cases that ended badly due to naïve girls going on dates with guys from Tinder. But I didn’t meet Wonwoo on Tinder…and I’ve already been watching him for weeks, I know what he’s like.
Honestly, you would pass on an opportunity like this one, Y/N? Isn’t this what we’ve been working for? Getting Wonwoo? Why did you even bother if you’re about to refuse him?!
When I saw Wonwoo typing, I quickly sent him my address, scared that he thought I was about to refuse him after I was the one who proposed getting lunch.
From Wonwoo: Alright, I’ll be there then.
To Wonwoo: Can’t wait to see you!
I instantly regretted sending that, but it was no use deleting it as he had already read the message.
From Wonwoo: Me too.
I giggled again and as I looked up; I saw a black Ferrari pulling up. I quickly scrambled to get out my camera from my bag and turned it on at lightning speed. I snapped pictures as the targets got out of the car. They were the same guys from the pictures Mark sent me, Minghao and Junhui. Both dressed pretty fancy and I knew they were the targets. I remained seated as they walked inside the first jewelry shop and snapped a picture of it. They didn’t spend much time in, quickly headed to the next one. I followed them from the bench as long as I could, but as they started walking towards the end of the street, I had to move too to be able to catch them. My phone and Wonwoo were forgotten, but just as I got up from the bench, throwing my bag over my shoulder and camera in my hand, my phone buzzed. As the targets were still inside the shop, I quickly checked to see that I had another new message from Wonwoo.
From Wonwoo: What are you doing right now?
I paused a little bit, finding his wording a little weird, but shrugged it off. I looked up just as the targets walked out of the shop and placed my phone in my pocket, snapping pictures as they talked and looked around. I wasn’t afraid that they’d see me as there were lots of people around us, but it still felt like I was being watched. They didn’t move from that spot, so I quickly answered Wonwoo.
To Wonwoo: Nothing much, just working. You?
I looked up to see the targets moving across the street, headed to a simple gardening shop. What could they be doing there? I started quickly walking towards it and snapped a picture just as I passed by in front of it, hopeful that no one saw me. Especially the targets. Then they walked out and headed down the street, towards the bench I was sitting at previously. I trailed after them, keeping a good distance as I pretended to look around and snapped a few pictures of the things that were displayed in the windows, trying to act normal and as if I was a tourist. I felt my phone vibrating again, so I checked it with a sigh. This isn’t how I’m supposed to be doing my work.
From Wonwoo: Working too, waiting for my boss.
So Wonwoo was with Mingyu then, probably sitting in his red Mercedes, waiting for Mingyu to show up and order him around. I didn’t react to the text message as the targets started moving again, headed for the Ferrari they have arrived in. Hastily, I snapped a few more pictures of the car, getting the license plate, and once they sped off, I took a deep breath. Well, I wasn’t caught, so that was amazing. Now I just have to send Mark all the photos and then have some lunch, my stomach is screaming for food.
I found a nice restaurant just around the corner and sat at a table at the back, opening my laptop. I copied all pictures on it and then sent Mark everything through an e-mail before deleting everything off my camera and laptop. No traces of what I had done, perfect as always.
To Mark: Everything good?
From Mark: Perfect, thanks again. I’ll pay you later, wait around a little bit.
To Mark: Fine, I have to eat either way!
And then I put my phone away and ordered food, which thankfully came quickly, as I was really hungry. I bobbed my head to the songs played on the radio while I ate, my legs bouncing underneath the table, unable to sit still. Not that it was something unusual. I was slurping up the rest of the soup when Doyoung messaged me and told me he would be home early again and that he could pick me up if I wanted him to. But I couldn’t as Mark had to pay me still, so I told him that I wanted to stay out alone for a little bit longer. And after almost two hours of me sitting at the restaurant, Mark finally called me that he was in front of the gardening shop, waiting for me. Paying for the food and greeting the lady, I left the restaurant in a hurry, glad that Mark finally showed up. In truth, I wanted Doyoung to pick me up, but he was at home by now and I didn’t want to bother him. I would just take a cab as it was getting dark and I didn’t want to walk home anymore. The exchange between Mark and I was brief as usual and I quickly found a cab for myself. I got in and told the driver where to take me and got comfortable against the beige leather seats. I sighed and started tapping my thigh with my fingers, looking out the window at the bright billboards and lights of the city. We went past the first intersection, but traffic was getting bad as everyone was headed home or out to have fun, so we caught the next red light. The cab driver turned the volume of the radio up a bit as he started bobbing his head to the beat and I found myself tapping along it too; the song was catchy. Police car sirens could be heard in the distance, but it wasn’t something unusual. Then suddenly, there was a commotion a few cars behind us and as I twisted my neck to see what was happening, four figures in all black and masks covering their whole faces ran up to the car. The cab driver panicked and before he could lock the doors, his door was ripped open and he was pulled out. I jumped and opened my own door in a hurry, wanting to get out, but I couldn’t as all four doors of the cab were now ripped open and the four men jumped in. I got pushed into the middle by my head by the man on my right and squeezed there as I gripped my bag to my chest. All doors were shut closed and only the driver put on his seatbelt. Suddenly, he started reeving the engine and then crashed into the car in front of us. The car jolted and I gasped as I was sent forward, eyes wide as my heart pumped loudly. God damn it, I should have just accepted Doyoung’s offer and asked Mark to pay me tomorrow. The cab driver was holding onto his head and screaming for help as the sirens got closer and the driver started honking, trying to make space for us to pass. I remained silent and shocked, gripping onto my bag and hopeful that they wouldn’t do anything to me. They seemed too stressed about leaving and getting away from the approaching police.
“For fuck’s sake!” Suddenly the one in the passenger seat shouted, his voice raspy, as he threw his door open and got halfway out. And then a silver thing glinted in his hand and I made myself small as I knew he was about to pull the trigger. The gunshots were loud as people started screaming around, suddenly the cars in front of us started moving aside, the light had turned green too.
“Floor it!” The man to my left shouted and the one in the passenger seat hopped back in as the driver pressed the gas pedal and we were sent flying forward. I yelped and held onto the headrest of the passenger seat tightly, looking ahead. The driver was honking constantly until every car started moving out of the way and we were flying down the road, but the sirens were closer too. So close, that the red and blue lights could be seen from inside the car. My breathing started to pick up as my left leg was bouncing very fast, and I was trying to remain as calm as I could. It seemed like they didn’t want to bother with me, so if I remain silent, maybe nothing will happen to me. I might as well blindfold myself so that I know nothing about where they are taking me and then they can let me free as I haven’t seen their faces.
The light turned red in front of us, but the driver wasn’t paying any attention to the traffic lights as he was speeding and switching lanes frantically, even going into the opposite lanes, making me squeeze my eyes shut. If we were about to run into any car, I didn’t want to see it. My bouncing leg knocked into something and I opened one eyes, becoming aware that these criminals were holding black bags that seemed to be heavy. They must have robbed some place and now were running away, just fucking perfect that they chose this cab! I gasped again as the car was jerked to the right and I was sent into the person on my left, making them hiss. I was expecting a slap or them to scream at me, but they just gently adjusted me back into the middle seat, turning their head towards me as if they realized for the first time that I was in the car too. I could see their brown eyes, and they widened. Mine widened too out of fear and I quickly ducked my head, holding onto my bag tightly. By now, the police was full on chasing these criminals, they were right behind us and the car was jerked to the left this time.
“Fuck this shit car!” A very deep voice suddenly shouted, making me jump, “I can’t outrun the fucking police in this old ass piece of shit—”
“Calm down!” The man on my right snapped, voice tense and raised. My left leg was bouncing so fast that I was getting a cramp in my thigh, but I couldn’t stop, I was on the brink of passing out from how anxious I was feeling. I stopped breathing normally a long time ago and I even started sweating, if only someone would’ve rolled down a window…
“Where the fuck do I go if they are trailing us? I can’t lose them here!” The deep voiced man continued shouting and he honked again as the sirens seemed to become deafening. But the more I concentrated on his deep voice, the more familiar it became. My body felt like it was made out of rock already, but it seemed like I could tense up even more. My breath got cut off for a second as my head snapped up, my whole body sitting up straight. My eyes bore into the back of the driver’s head. I knew that voice, but it can’t be. My brain is just making up things, I’m under so much stress that I started making up things.
“Take the back streets!” The man from the passenger seat answered him, “Boss is waiting at the docks.”
“The docks are fucking half an hour away from here! Start shooting at their cars tires, you idiots!” The driver’s deep voice boomed in the car and I shivered as three windows were rolled down. The three men suddenly all had weapons in their hands and they started shooting at the police car that was speeding beside the cab. I remained staring at the driver as my brain was screaming at me that the voice belonged to Wonwoo. Suddenly, the guy looked in the rearview mirror and our gazes connected. My mouth fell open when I saw foxy eyes staring back at me with the intensity I was used to seeing from Wonwoo, their brown seemed to be even darker as I gaped at Wonwoo. This can’t be happening, no. This must be a joke. But Wonwoo’s eyes narrowed and he quickly looked back at the road, taking another sharp turn as the rest managed to get rid of that one police car, but at least three more were still chasing us. Suddenly, I felt my phone vibrating in my back pocket and I let go of my bag with one hand, only now noticing how badly I was shaking. I knew no one was paying attention to me, so I curled up into a ball and sneakily placed the phone against my ear after hitting the green button.
“Y/N?!” Doyoung’s voice was frantic and the sirens were even louder through the phone, “Why the hell are you in the car we are chasing—”
Suddenly, the phone was ripped from my hands and I shrieked, trying to reach for it, “Doyoung!”
But the guys on each of my side held me down and the man in the passenger’s seat had the phone against his ear.
“Listen here—” But he was cut off by Doyoung, I could hear him screaming through the phone, but I didn’t understand what he was saying as all I could hear were my own loud heart beats as I struggled against the men holding me. Finally, my flight or fight kicked in, and I chose to fight as I didn’t really have the opportunity to run. Only God knows what was about to happen, I wasn’t going to sit around anymore. I elbowed the man on my right in the stomach and he cried out loudly as I finally freed my right arm. The man on my left was very skinny, but despite that he was very strong and my arm was turning numb, that’s how hard he was squeezing me. I started fighting against him too, punched him in the face with my free hand, even though he tried dodging it. My left arm was free too and I lunged for the guy in the passenger seat, knowing that I’d kill all of us if I started choking Wonwoo. So instead, my hands went around the other guy’s neck from behind as I started squeezing, the words he was about to say to my brother dying away in his throat. My phone fell from his hand and he gripped my wrists, trying to claw at me with his nails, but he was wearing glows. I started squeezing even harder as Wonwoo started swerving the car around violently.
“Get a fucking grip on her!” He shouted as with his right hand he gripped my bicep and started yanking on my arm. I cried out in pain, trying to elbow him as suddenly hands around my waist and forearms were pulling me back harshly. The guy I was choking started fighting back too, probably close to passing out as his struggling became less and less. But these guys were very strong, and two were pulling me back while one was squeezing so hard on my bicep that it felt like someone was trying to rip my arm off, I had to let go of the guy in the passenger seat. He started coughing and wheezing loudly as he fell forward. I screamed as I was restrained, this time the guys were almost sitting on me to stop me from fighting back. Wonwoo looked at me through the rearview mirror and I knew that he knew I recognized him, his deadly glare made me still instantly. I was rooted against the leather seat as he reached for my phone and hit a button, no doubt calling my brother.
“You want your sister? You play along with me.” Was all he said before hanging up and throwing the phone back at me, hitting my knees as it fell onto the ground. The guys still held me tightly, even though I stopped struggling. The one in the front stopped coughing, but he was still leaned over, holding onto his head as he was breathing loudly. My lungs were rising and falling at an alarming pace as my legs started bouncing again. But then suddenly Wonwoo took a sharp U turn and the police cars stopped following us. The sirens stopped blaring, all you could see were the lights, lights that were getting farther away from us. Doyoung was getting farther away from me, he was in one of those cars! I bit my lower lip and tried to keep the thoughts about me dying out as for once in my life I focused on the voices.
Look at that, Y/N is having the most fun she’s ever head. Don’t worry, you won’t die. Wonwoo won’t kill you, he’s into you. And he probably knows that you know it’s him. Isn’t he just so hot? The way he screamed, the way he’s driving…and you thought he was boring?! His burning gaze makes you feel all sorts of ways, Y/N, admit it. Now calm down, you are getting out of this alive.
The voices weren’t helpful as they were rambling about Wonwoo, but I did take a deep breath and noticed that until I was zoned out, he stopped driving at a crazy speed. We were downtown, but nowhere close to the docks. Wonwoo pulled up into the parking lot of a poorly lit convenience store, where a police car was already there. But all lights were off and only one man was there, walking around the car anxiously. It was Doyoung and my heart almost jumped out of my chest when Wonwoo stopped the car just next to Doyoung’s police car. The doors were kicked open again and I jumped when the guy on my left held onto my bicep, Wonwoo squeezed me so hard that my whole arm was on fire, it would bruise so ugly. I was pulled out of the car, but not manhandled, as Doyoung came to a stop at the back of the car. The guy let go of me and I took two hurried steps, but someone blocked my path, and I ran into their hard chest. Musk and gunpowder. I didn’t look up at Wonwoo, only stared at his chest as I held my bag against my stomach, my whole-body trembling.
“Say a word to anyone about this, I know where you live and I won’t hesitate to find you.” His deep voice was low as he whispered to me, radiating anger. I bit my lower lip and said nothing as I knocked into him hard and walked past to get to Doyoung. He was quick to pull me into his arms and I clung onto him, telling myself that I was finally safe. It was silent as no one dared to say anything; Doyoung was so tense, he felt like I was hugging a rock.
“If you ever again put my sister into danger, I won’t hesitate to continue what Sana started. You’re lucky I’ve known Mingyu since we were kids, otherwise you’d be laying in jail for life right now.” Doyoung was so angry, his voice trembled and it even raised a few octaves as he spoke to the criminals. I couldn’t believe what he was saying. He was just letting them off like that? They were criminals!
“Your generosity will be always returned, you know that, Doyoung.” The guy I choked could barely speak, his voice was a low rasp and then I heard something colliding against the concrete. Doyoung moved us a little as car doors were closed and the engine of the cab started again as Wonwoo pulled out of the parking lot with the tires screeching. I let go of Doyoung and looked at him disappointed, lips trembling.
“You’re a corrupt cop?” I managed to say as a few tears fell from my eyes. He looked down at the bag and picked it up, remorse showing on his face.
“You weren’t supposed to find out, but it’s a complicated story—”
“Nothing about this is complicated!” I shouted, angrily wiping the tears off my cheeks, “You just let four criminals run off like nothing happened! Like I couldn’t have been killed in that chase or afterwards by them! If people like you are the ones protecting this city everyone should be afraid for their own lives!”
Doyoung’s face got red and he pointed a finger at me, “You don’t get to tell me what’s wrong and what’s right! I’m not perfect; you think you’re the only one with flaws, Y/N?! Wake up! I’m not the perfect brother you always make me out to be! Once you start working for the mafia there’s no way out—”
“You work for the mafia?!” I screamed, seeing Doyoung in a different light for the first time. He really wasn’t the person I thought he was. The innocent Doyoung never existed, at least not since he’s been working for the mafia apparently.
“No, but I help them out sometimes. Mingyu and I made a pact a long time ago—”
“Kim Mingyu is the mafia leader?”
“Yes—”
“Who is Jeon Wonwoo?” Doyoung paused for a second, eyebrows furrowing. I raised my eyebrows at him as I waited for an answer. Oh, and he was going to give me all the answers I wanted.
“A very skilled getaway driver, Mingyu’s closest and most trusted friend, and his chauffeur.” Doyoung answered me after he took a deep breath, searching my face for a reaction. But it never came, I surpassed it. I felt tired and I was aching all over, I need a warm bath and sleep. I didn’t even want to know anything anymore, that was enough.
“Let’s go home.” I said with a sigh and walked up to the police car, “I’m very tired.”
“Y/N—”
“Now, Doyoung.” I snapped and opened the door, sitting inside angrily. Doyoung shook his head before following suit, remaining silent for the rest of the night.
Isn’t Wonwoo just the most amazing person you’ve ever—Shut up, I shouted in my head, closing my eyes tightly. I was done listening to the voices. I wanted nothing to do with them anymore. No, Wonwoo was a criminal and he made it very clear what he’d do if I said anything about what happened. I was going to ask Mark to return that damned t-shirt to him and I never wanted to see Wonwoo again or talk to him again. I blocked his number and deleted all pictures I had of him in my phone. In the morning, when I was home alone, I was going to burn every single thing I had collected about him, every single picture I snapped. He was a criminal and I wanted nothing to do with him anymore.
           Ever since last night Doyoung was acting like I was an alien. He didn’t speak to me; he didn’t even look at me! He quietly greeted me when I walked to the kitchen to have breakfast, but before I could thank him for making breakfast or ask him how he slept, he was out of the front door. He barely checked up on me all day, and when I gave him a call to ask him if he’d come home for lunch as I cooked food, he didn’t answer but sent a text saying that he couldn’t speak to me at the moment. It was pissing me off. I didn’t want him to make this harder for us. What I found out was a lot to take in and I wasn’t proud of him, but he was my brother and he was the only person who stood by my side since day one without judging me. I loved him very much and I needed him next to me. I needed him to understand that nothing changed between us, besides the fact that currently I was very pissed off and scared. The police were still patrolling around the neighborhood as no DNA was found inside the house that didn’t belong to us, and honestly, I was on the verge of inviting the officers inside the house as I jumped at every sound. Sleep came easily as I was very stressed, but my eyes opened at five in morning and I haven’t been able to go back to sleep, so I got to work. I gathered everything I had on Wonwoo and threw it in the fireplace in the back garden and watched it as it burned away in the morning light. It eased my nerves a little bit as I clutched the blanket tighter around me, knowing that Wonwoo was out of town today. But tomorrow he wouldn’t be, and I had a feeling that he was still going to want to meet up with me. But I didn’t want to, not anymore. Knowing that Mark wasn’t sleeping at that hour, I called him, and told him everything that happened. He was very sorry and felt really guilty and promised to never send me off to watch mafia members, I was content with that. Watching shady business men was alright, but following mafia members wasn’t fun anymore. I stayed inside the whole day after I went on my run and just cleaned and cooked even more. I updated my blog and accepted a request of someone to put up my photos in their gallery next month. Since Mark wasn’t going to contact me for a while now, I started looking for vacation destinations. I really needed it, I had to get away from the city for a while. The voices went quiet and even when I listened closely, I only heard intangible whispers. It was good, it meant I was over Wonwoo. Even if I wasn’t really. The fairytale I was living in was shattered and as I glanced at his folded t-shirt, I sighed. I was hoping that for once I finally found someone who would be good for me, but it turned out I was very wrong. Usually my hunches were good, but this time I was totally blinded by his attractiveness and the voices that never knew better. Shaking my head, I remembered the old lady from the woods and wondered if she was still alive…or if she’d recognize me if I showed up. She told me she’d welcome me anytime again, but I didn’t visit her very frequently as my family was keeping a close eye on me after I ran away, and it was fine. But now, I craved to be engulfed in total silence and the green nature around me.
Nightfall came and I was eating on the couch as I watched a reality show, laughing loudly when something was amusing. It wasn’t very late, but the sun still set early as we haven’t passed the spring solstice yet. I just bit into the meatball I made for lunch when the front door was unlocked and I heard Doyoung’s keys.
“Hi!” I called out with my mouth full, raising the hand with which I was holding the fork to wave at him. Doyoung hummed and went to the fridge directly and opened it.
“Oh, I made a lot of food today,” I said as I turned around, resting both legs on the couch, “Meatballs, found some spaghetti too so I made some sauce for it. I made a salad with the veggies we had and lentil cream soup, your favorite!”
But Doyoung didn’t react and my eyebrows furrowed as I chewed the food I had in my mouth. This had do end right now, I wasn’t going to let my brother treat me like I was invisible just because I found out that he’s a corrupt cop.
“Hey!” I snapped, placing the plate on the coffee table forcefully, “Stop being a pussy and face me!”
Doyoung sighed and threw a glance at me as he took out the soup and I spoke again, “Aren’t I the one supposed to be giving you the silent treatment?!”
Doyoung just shrugged as he took a bowl and poured soup into it, “I don’t know…”
“Nice to hear you are still able to speak—”
“Are you not mad?” Doyoung cut me off before I could finish my sarcastic remark and I glared at him.
“I’m very mad, but it doesn’t mean that I’ll stop acknowledging you, yeah? What kind of shit person does that?” I rolled my eyes and Doyoung chuckled, throwing a glance at me as he sat at the table to eat.
“The me kind of shit person apparently.” I chuckled and resumed eating as Doyoung did too. I lowered the volume of the TV a little bit and turned back towards him again, taking in his attire. His uniform changed; I didn’t notice it this morning.
“You have a new uniform?” I asked with a grin and Doyoung nodded, looking down at himself.
“Yeah, I got it today.” I nodded and bit into the meatball.
“Well, congratulations—next time lock the mafia guys up, yeah?” Doyoung paused and I knew it was too soon to joke about this, but I wasn’t exactly joking. My tone wasn’t playful at all and Doyoung sighed, wordlessly nodding as he started slurping his soup.
“Were you that hungry? You didn’t even change…” I wondered as Doyoung finished eating and stood up.
“No, but I have to go to the funeral house. It’s Sana’s watcher…” My lips formed a thin line as I nodded, finishing my dinner wordlessly as Doyoung moved around the kitchen. He squeezed some lemon in his water and drank it, closing his eyes for a second. His body seemed tense and he was hunched a little forward as he washed away the dishes he used.
“Don’t come too late, you should rest more.” I said as Doyoung nodded and put on his shoes, taking his keys.
“You too, don’t wait for me.” He said and I nodded, watching him leave the house. The locked the door and I sighed, getting up from the couch. I walked to the sink and washed the plate and fork I used, putting them away. I left the TV on as I just wanted to change into my pajamas and go back to watch something before bed. But as I reached my door, I heard footsteps outside the front door and knocking. Rolling my eyes, I walked to the front door and unlocked it, ready to tease Doyoung for forgetting something at home again. But it wasn’t Doyoung. I froze as I stared at Wonwoo’s face, goosebumps suddenly covering my body. Then I realized it was Wonwoo and quickly tried to slam the door closed, but Wonwoo was quick to react and he started pushing it back. I hissed and put all of my weight against it, struggling to close it as Wonwoo was pushing just as hard to open it up. I was wearing socks and my right leg slipped on the tiles and Wonwoo gained advantage as my weight shifted. He was able to push it wide enough to slip inside and I quickly abandoned the thought of trying to keep him out of the house and ran to the cupboard full of knives. I quickly opened it and took out the sharpest knife we had and turned around, just in time as Wonwoo almost reached me.
“Stay away!” I pointed the knife at him and he stayed rooted, his sharp eyes gazing into mine, “What do you want? I didn’t say anything to anyone—Doyoung already knew about you! You want your bloody t-shirt?! It’s in my room!”
Wonwoo remained silent and I jerked my hand slightly, showing him that I wasn’t afraid to stab him. I wouldn’t go down without a good fight, in case he thought I was scared of him. Which I was, but I was angrier right now and it ruled over my fear.
“I just came to talk.” Wonwoo said calmly and I chuckled dryly, rolling my eyes.
“Oh, nice talking. This is how you usually do it? You break into someone’s house and get threatened by a knife and then just…talk?”
“I usually don’t get threatened.” Wonwoo answered with a shrug and I huffed, eyes darting towards my phone that was on the coffee table. If I outsmart Wonwoo, I can get to my phone and run inside my room and jump out the window. Then he can try and talk to me, but I won’t be here anymore.
“Well…less stressful for you, I guess.” I tried stalling, gripping the knife tighter, “But I’m not in the mood to talk.”
“Just listen to me, I’m not here to hurt you.” Wonwoo’s voice softened and his eyes did too as he tried pleading me with his gaze. I rolled my eyes and then lunged towards him, without the intention of stabbing him. I just wanted to take him off guard, to distract him. And it worked as he jumped back with a gasp, his sharp eyes widening. I dropped the knife and pushed him hard, making him fall onto his butt. I quickly ran around him and got to the fridge when I was grabbed. Well, obviously my plan wasn’t a smart one and this is why Doyoung checked on me regularly. I really needed someone to look after me. I yelped as Wonwoo’s arms went around my waist and roughly yanked me back, pinning me against the table with his body. He didn’t look very pleased and my heart started beating quickly, thinking of a way to free myself from his grip. I could either kneel him or just try and headbutt him, but it seemed like Wonwoo guessed what I was thinking as his lean and muscular body molded into mine. My wrists were pinned to the table and I shivered, his cologne hitting my nose hard. He smelled like musk and gunpowder again and he was so close I could count his lashes if I wanted to. I craned my head back and tried to move around, but it only made me feel more parts of body and that was too much just yet.
Look at this compromising position, Y/N. All you have to do is lean in and open your knees, isn’t that what you’ve wanted all along? We are guessing Wonwoo wants the same thing…not that we are complaining.
I tried to remain unexpressive as the voices suddenly returned and were very loud, of course they’d come back in a situation like this one.
“Well, this is very uncomfortable.” I said quietly, maintaining the eye contact with Wonwoo. My heart was beating fast and I could feel the heat in my cheeks. This wasn’t the reaction I was expecting. Why do I still like him? After yesterday…how can I still like him?
“Well, you didn’t give me a choice.” Wonwoo muttered, his low voice vibrating against his chest and I rolled my eyes.
“Yeah, sure,” I scoffed and then glared at him, “why would I want to talk to a criminal? Let alone give him a chance to explain himself?”
“Did you let your brother explain himself?” Wonwoo’s eyebrows rose and I glanced away, trying to free my wrists again.
“Kind of…” Wonwoo just hummed and lessened his hold on my wrist so that it didn’t hurt anymore. The bicep he squeezed so hard was now a beautiful shade of green and purple.
“Then it’s my turn—”
“Whatever Wonwoo, I really don’t care. You’re part of the mafia and you robbed the jewelry shops Mark asked me to watch yesterday. And then you had to run away because Mark alerted the police thanks to me and then very sadly you got in the same cab with me. And look at my bicep, you did that.” I snapped, looking down at the bruise as Wonwoo’s gaze followed. His eyebrows furrowed and he sighed, looking back up at me.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to do that.” He muttered with remorse as he looked at it again. His words and reaction were genuine but I just rolled my eyes.
“A little late for that, now—” I shoved myself into him, but it did nothing, “Let go of me.”
Wonwoo’s lips pulled in a straight line and he shook his head, seemingly thinking about what to do next. But I started struggling and trying to move him back so that I would be able to knee him. But he probably knew that was what I was trying to do and squeezed my legs together between his.
“God, the second I get out of your hold I will beat you up so badly, Wonwoo, no one will be able to recognize you—” Wonwoo’s deep laughter echoed in the house as I looked at him menacingly. I wasn’t joking, I really wanted to beat him up and I would, but I needed to free myself first.
“I love how you underestimate me; the shock will be bigger once I’m done—” But Wonwoo’s laughter was so contagious that I had to fight back my own. His nose was scrunched up and I just noticed how he wasn’t wearing glasses. His hair was styled back and he seemed to be wearing some fancy clothes, his pants were silky. He was very attractive, but I tried to ignore my sudden thirst for him. So, I looked away and he slowly stopped laughing, my eyes fell on the front door as I tried coming up with another escape route. But on the ground were five white lilies and I felt my mind go blank as I stared at them. There’s no possible way anyone brought those in, Doyoung and I never buy white lilies, and Wonwoo is the only one that just barged in. Wonwoo.
“Oh my God,” I muttered in despair, looking at Wonwoo all frantic, “Did you—bring those flowers? Wonwoo?!”
Wonwoo looked at the flowers and cleared his throat, looking back at me, “Yeah.”
“Oh my God.” I muttered again and felt like a deer caught in headlights. It was Wonwoo all along? What is happening? I don’t understand anything anymore!
Well…at least you found out who your secret admirer is. And it’s Wonwoo, you should be happy it’s him and not some old creep—
“Shut up!” I exclaimed, squeezing my eyes shut, “This can’t be happening. No fucking way.”
Wonwoo looked confused when I opened my eyes and looked at him, “You were breaking in our house for two weeks?!”
“You’re the one to make a scene, huh?” Wonwoo suddenly raised his voice and his eyes narrowed as he started glaring at me, “You’ve been stalking me for two weeks.”
I gaped at him and blinked, taken off guard, “I—I wasn’t—what?”
“Yeah, you really thought I wouldn’t know?” He chuckled unamused, “I’m surprised it took you this long to realize it was me bringing the flowers.”
My eyebrows furrowed and I looked at him confused, “How was I supposed to know?! I thought you had no idea I was watching you—”
“Stalking me.”
“Stalking you, whatever,” I rolled my eyes, trying to make sense of the situation, “It doesn’t give you the right to break in my room and—were you marking your territory or some shit mafias do? Were you showing other mafias that you were to be the one to kill me—”
“What nonsense are you talking about?” Wonwoo’s eyebrows furrowed and I tried to push him away again, my back was becoming numb, “You fantasize too much. Mafias don’t do that, but—”
“But what?!” I snapped, eyes widening.
“I did think of killing you in the first three days of you stalking me.” Wonwoo finished with a smirk. My heart skipped another beat as I started breathing faster, his musky scent made me feel dizzy.
“What?!” I exclaimed and started struggling against Wonwoo again, trying to free myself, “For God’s sake, I can’t feel my back anymore, Wonwoo!”
He gave me a look that said if I tried running away again he’d tie me to a chair and leave me there until Doyoung returned, he probably would’ve gagged me too, so I just sighed and let go of all muscles, softening my body. Wonwoo’s eyes gazed into mine intently and his hold slowly loosened as he seemed to lean in subconsciously. My eyes fell onto his lips and realized how plump his upper lip was, but we both snapped out if at the same time as he stepped back and I jumped away from the table, breathing hard. I massaged my lower back as best as I could as I licked my lips and looked at Wonwoo with a glare.
“I don’t like what I’m about to say—” And I took a deep breath and watched as Wonwoo started smirking again, “But what if…we both just forget about all the shit we did and…go on and live our lives like we never met. And, I don’t know, get some therapy as we both apparently need it badly.”
My words made Wonwoo laugh again and I actually smiled this time too, feeling tired after all the new information dumped on me.
“I can’t do that,” Wonwoo said once his laughter died down, “I can’t continue living like I never met you.”
I shrugged and ran my hands through my hair, looking away from him, “Well, I can and I will. So, you better do the same or else I’ll tell Doyoung about everything and he’ll be really pissed and won’t care about Mingyu or whoever, yeah?”
Look at our Y/N lying like that, as if all of this didn’t happen because of her.
I felt Wonwoo move closer to me and his fingers ghosted over the bruise on my left bicep, “Can you really pretend I don’t exist? When you started this?”
“I didn’t start shit!” I snapped and turned my body away from his, “I stalked you for two weeks and I won’t do it anymore because I got over you. I always do. It never lasts for long, you’re not special.”
But he is Y/N, you know it. He knows it.
“Really?” Wonwoo muttered with a small smile and I just shrugged, avoiding his gaze, “Because I watched you the whole time we were in the same Coffee Shop. You were following that businessman, working for Mark, I assume. I noticed how you couldn’t stay still and how you whispered things to yourself. How the barista lit up when she saw you and talked to you. If you wouldn’t have stalked me after that day, I would’ve still found you.”
I just gulped and felt all the anger, frustration, fear melt away as I slowly looked at Wonwoo, “But you broke inside my bedroom…to give me flowers…”
My voice was small and he nodded as he stepped closer, placing his palm on my cheek. I almost jumped at how warm his palm was again and tried to ignore the rapid beat of my heart, “And I was wrong to do that…sorry.”
“Sorry for stalking you.” I muttered and a small grin appeared on Wonwoo’s lips as he closed the distance between our bodies again.
“I’m also sorry for the other bad things I did.” Wonwoo added.
“Yeah, fuck you.” I said with a chuckle and his grin widened into a smile.
You’d love that, wouldn’t you, Y/N?
I rolled my eyes at the voices but Wonwoo didn’t react as he leaned down and his red lips pressed against my cheek, making me blush instantly. Why did I forgive him so easily? Maybe because both of us fucked up big time this time.
“I still expect to see you tomorrow at lunch for our date, so tell Mark to stay at home.” My eyes widened as Wonwoo stepped back, letting go of my cheek.
“How do you know—”
“I’m in the mafia, remember? I know everything.” He winked and walked towards the front door.
“And you called me the stalker.” He chuckled as he opened the door and stepped outside.
“Don’t tell Doyoung just yet, he’s very mad for what I did yesterday—”
“Yeah, me too.” I cut him off and Wonwoo gave me an apologetic smile.
“Sleep well.”
“Don’t break in my room anymore!” I called out as he walked down towards the gate, turning around to wave at me. I rolled my eyes and closed the front door, locking it. Jesus, this really is not how I expected things to turn out. I don’t think I need to watch any TV to feel sleepy. This is my cue to rest and worry about what to wear tomorrow for lunch.
You can wear whatever, Wonwoo is head over heels for you, Y/N. And as we’re seeing, you’re too for him.
202 notes · View notes
sporticus1234 · 3 years
Text
Catch Me if You Can-Laws of Attraction (Part 1)
Summary: After weeks of flirting, teasing, and close calls, Tessa is ready to take the plunge, but can Gabe overcome his own worse fears and join her?
Pairing: Gabe Ricci x Main Character (Tessa Michaels)
Link to my Master-List and Other works will be added once they have been re-edited and re-uploaded.
Perma-Tags and LOA Tags: @choices-addict @choiceskatie @lady-calypso @chemist-ana @kat-tia801 @chrissythadon @nishas-paradise  @blainehellyes @mm2305 @suitfer​ @thegreentwin @pixelnutrookie​ 
I hope you all enjoy it and see you soon for some...adventures...in part 2.
__________________________________
Rather than clumsy words, it’s your action that I believe. Don’t stop. Go past the limit. Go faster. I’m going to find my heart. So catch me if you can.
-Girls Generation, Catch Me if You Can (Korean Ver.)
__________________________________
The once glittering ballroom filled with stimulating conversation, flowing bubbles of champagne, and decadent hor-dourves was now deserted and quiet, signaling the end of the extravagant weekend legal conference. As the last person Tessa was speaking to excused herself for the evening, she looked around the empty space littered with discarded champagne flutes and linen napkins, her spirits deflating at the sight. The conference ended as quickly as it began, and come Monday morning, she would be back in the office, the competition still at the forefront of everyone’s minds.
It may have been a short weekend, but Tessa was grateful for the time away from the office. The past few weeks were filled with nothing else but case after case coming one after another and nonstop talk about the competition, particularly from Martin. But for a tiny period of time, all of that vanished out of sight and out of mind. She laughed and joked with her colleagues and bosses like they were all good friends. She camped and ate smores in a beautiful forest, and she finally got her first full night of sleep since she started working at McGraw Byrne. She truly felt like she had been transported to a completely different world, one she found hesitant to leave behind for an entire year.
Stifling the yawn sneaking up on her, she left the ballroom behind, her spirits still thrumming with excitement from the evening, but her body yearning for a soak in a hot bath and some sleep in the oversized hotel bed. She was halfway across the empty lobby, gilded elevator doors in sight, when her feet came to a stop outside of the hotel’s bar. She didn’t even have to look to know exactly who was sitting in that dimly lit bar. He had a larger-than-life presence, no matter what room he was in, that was like a magnet, drawing everyone’s attention, even if he was just randomly passing by on the sidewalk.
Her tiredness completely forgotten, she hovers near the entryway and discretely watches him. He’s sitting by himself at the bar, nursing what Tessa knows is a glass of scotch on the rocks along with a basket of half-eaten chips and dip, his eyes occasionally flicking up to the large screen TV showing a basketball game taking place on the other side of the country. His jacket is discarded on the back of his chair, his tie loosened slightly and the buttons of his shirt rakishly undone at the top. Despite his disheveled, executive blowing off steam look, he is still just as handsome and attractive as he was just a short time ago when he was polished and buttoned up. Maybe even more.
A small smile tugs at the corners of her lips as she watches him. Gabe was such a surprise when she first came to New York, and she never expected to become so charmed by him. The man has such a lavish and lively personality on the outside, but on the inside is a man driven to be the best and passionate about using his vast knowledge to help everyone. His heart is as big as his office, a welcoming, refreshing contrast to the selfishness Tessa sees too often in this line of work. They have only known each other for a short time, but every time he came around, he put a smile on her face and made her stomach flip-flop. She couldn’t explain why he has such a pleasant effect on her. Perhaps it’s the way that when she flirts with him, he flirts right back with the same energy she gives him, maybe even more. Maybe it’s the way the two of them click when they’re together. Or maybe it’s the way he continues to keep her on her toes and excite her yet still make her feel a sense of comfort and familiarity at the same time. Regardless of the reasons, the one thing she was certain of was that she didn’t want this fluttering feeling to stop. Ever.
“Of course, you would be alone at a bar,” Tessa teases as she steps towards him.
Gabe swivels his head around at the sound of her voice, his eyes immediately catching hers as she approaches him. His lips twist into a grin, his spirits lifting like they always do whenever she is around. “Am I really that predictable?”
Tessa shrugs. “Maybe a little. But you wouldn’t be the Gabe Ricci we all know and love if you weren’t.”
Gabe chuckles. “Most people wouldn’t agree with you on that statement.”
“I’m not most people,” she fires back with a wink.
No, you are most definitely not Gabe thought. “What exactly are you doing still wandering around?” He glances down towards his watch, mildly surprised to find it still somewhat early. “The cocktail party ended almost an hour ago. I figured you would be in bed like everyone else.”
“I planned on it, but then I saw this guy sitting all by himself in this empty hotel bar and thought he could use some company.”
Gabe’s eyes twinkle with delightful mischief as he takes another sip of his scotch. He was hoping the two of them could spend some more time together before the madness hit them Monday morning. “I think I know who you’re talking about. And I, for one, know that he would love to have some company, especially if the company happens to be you.”
Tessa gives him a shy smile as she slips into the bar stool next to him. An electrical, buzzing warmth fills up the space around them as butterflies flutter in her stomach at the near closeness to him, the scent of his cologne invading her senses and tempting her to come even closer. As she peruses the small menu, the lone bartender comes over and places a napkin down in front of her.
“Anything to eat or drink?”
“A Manhattan please.”
The bartender nods before turning to Gabe. “Another refill for you, sir?”
“Please,” Gabe replies. “And put her Manhattan on my tab as well.”
The bartender grabs Gabe’s empty glass and heads down to the other end of the bar. Once he’s fully out of hearing range, Tessa turns to face Gabe. “You didn’t have to do that,” she says. “I am more than capable of paying for my own drinks.”
“I know you could pay for it,” Gabe responds before his lips curl into his trademark sly smirk, “or you could let Sadie pay for it.”
“Wait, what?”
Gabe nods, his smirk growing bigger. “Consider it another partner-only secret. This conference is one of the few events Sadie lets us have more…leeway…with the company credit card. Any food or drinks we buy at this conference gets covered by the firm.”
“And something tells me you’re taking full advantage of that offer,” Tessa says.
Gabe gives her a wink. “What can I say? A good attorney knows a good offer when they see it.”
“In that case,” Tessa flags down the bartender again. “I’ll do an order of the spicy fried pickle chips with that Manhattan.” The bartender nods and disappears into a back room. Tessa turns her head, seeing Gabe looking at her with an amused expression on his face. “What’s that look for?”
Gabe chuckles, shaking his head. “Just wondering if I’m going to regret sharing that secret with you.”
“Don’t worry,” Tessa grins at him. “Your secret is safe with me. But if Sadie cuts us off or starts questioning anything on the credit card bills, I’m placing the full blame on you.”
The two of them continue to make small talk until the bartender comes back a few minutes later. He places their drinks and her basket of food down before excusing himself and shuffling into the back room once again. Tessa grabs her glass and holds it up in a toast, prompting Gabe to do the same.
“To drinks on someone else’s dime,” she states.
The two of them share a laugh as they clink their glasses together. Tessa takes a sip of her drink, the whiskey a sharp contrast to the bubbly champagne of the reception. The liquid pools like fire in her stomach and flows throughout her body, warming her up and loosening her muscles. “Best Manhattan I’ve ever had.”
Gabe cocks his eyebrow. “Is it really the best?”
“Oh, not by a long shot. But since I didn’t have to pay for it, I consider it the best in my book.”
“You really are a woman after my own heart,” Gabe replies. Tessa tucks her gaze away from him, feeling her face grow hot at the combination of the whiskey and his spell-binding charm. She takes another sip of her drink before sliding the basket of pickle chips towards him. He throws her an appreciative “thanks”, taking a chip and popping it into his mouth before continuing their conversation. “How did you enjoy the conference?”
“I really liked it,” Tessa answers. “I never got the chance to do things like this with my old law firm.”
“What? Have free food and drinks on someone else’s dime with a devastatingly handsome senior partner?”
Tessa shoves him with a laugh. “No, you complete smart ass. I meant going out to events and connecting with other people.” She absentmindedly picks the coating off a pickle chip, her mind reminiscing. “Don’t get me wrong. I love my hometown, but there was no excitement in my life. It was the same boring routine every single day.”
“Sounds like you and McGraw Byrne are a perfect match.”
Tessa nods. “Honestly, I really have you to thank. If you didn’t recommend hiring me to Sadie, I still would be stuck in the same boring routine. It sounds really sappy, but you really did change my life for the better…in more ways than one.”
The raw honesty in her voice tugs at his heartstrings, his lips twitching into another smile. He’s used to hearing those words come from his clients, but hearing those words come from her just felt…different, and it made him feel something he couldn’t quite place his finger on.
“You’re very welcome,” Gabe earnestly tells her. “I wouldn’t have recommended you if I didn’t think you were a stellar attorney. You deserve to be here just as much as everyone else, and I truly mean that. McGraw Byrne needed someone like you. Hell, the legal world needs more attorneys like you.”
“What? Sappy and sentimental ones?”
“No,” Gabe says, stifling his chuckle. “I meant attorneys who are passionate about their job and passionate about connecting with people. So many attorneys don’t take the time to really understand or listen to their clients. Having someone like you, someone who actually connects with clients and goes above and beyond to help them, really does make a world of difference.” Gabe takes a pickle chip and pops it into his mouth. “But I really am happy you decided to take Sadie up on her offer to join us, even if the past few days have given you plenty of good reasons to quit.”
Tessa blows out a harsh breath, knowing exactly what Gabe was referring to. “Yeah, they have been quite…challenging.”
“I meant to ask you earlier, but how’re you holding up?”
Tessa sighs, dragging her fingertip over the rim of her glass. “Honestly, I’m still pissed that Beau stole the credit from me in front of everyone, but I should’ve expected someone to pull that stunt sooner or later.” She blinks back a tear trying to escape. “It just sucks to be the one it happens to.”
“I know, and I truly am sorry Beau pulled such a dick move on you.” He sympathetically lays a gentle hand on her bare shoulder, the touch sending comfort through her veins. “If I could’ve done something to make it better, I would’ve done it in a heartbeat.”
“I know you would’ve, but I do appreciate you not saying anything to Sadie.”
He shrugs. “Wasn’t my place to tell her. Besides,” he takes his hand off her shoulder, already missing the feel of her smooth, soft skin, “the only thing it would’ve done was make you and me look bad in front of Sadie.”
“Sounds like someone has personal experience.”
Gabe runs a hand through his hair. “Happened to me once back in my early legal days, but instead of getting the credit and respect that I rightfully deserved, I got told off for being a bad ‘team player’ and trying to take someone else’s credit.”
“That’s so unfair,” she practically spits.
Gabe lets out a bitter, humorless guffaw. “Preaching to the choir on that one. You’ll find that every group will have one person who will do none of the work or the one person that will take credit for anything and everything. Fortunately for us, Beau happens to be both of those assholes wrapped up in one, so we save a lot on payroll.”
Tessa laughs weakly at his joke, the sting of Beau’s betrayal still fresh in her mind. “Thanks for trying to make me feel better. It just sucks knowing that Sadie is always going to believe that Beau solved the case.”
“If it’s any consolation, I’m still incredibly proud of you, even if Sadie never knows the truth.”
“You…are?” she asks, surprise etched on her face as she turns her body towards him.
“Absolutely,” Gabe says, no hesitation in his voice. “Without you, we possibly would’ve never solved it to begin with, nor would Lydia have thought to make Joey sign a prenup. But what really impressed me was how you were the only one to step up and take initiative when needed. Not many of the senior partners would go to such lengths for a teenager like Lydia, but you did.”
“I guess,” Tessa mutters. “I just hope it will be enough come Monday.”
“It will be,” Gabe assures her as he steals another pickle chip.
“Really? I figured Sadie would shove Beau to the top of the rankings after he basically saved the firm.”
“Everyone in that room knows who really saved the firm, and it wasn’t Beau,” Gabe points out. “Even if Sadie believes he did, she’s also smart enough to know that one win, no matter how big it is, isn’t enough to judge how good an attorney is or will become. Beau may have stolen one win, but you’re still the one to beat.”
“I guess that’s true…”
“Plus, you showed her tonight how well you bounce back after taking a loss.”
“What do you mean?”
“Between moot court, the pro bono cases, the vaccine trial, and everything else we’ve observed, you had a major winning streak that Beau decided to snap. Most people would sulk in their losses, but you didn’t. You showed up tonight, looking incredible might I add, and managed to put everything behind you to impress the right group of people.”
“If you say so.”
“I know so,” Gabe confidently replies. He reaches out and covers her hand with his, trying to ignore the tingling buzzes on his skin. “You’re a wickedly smart attorney, Tessa. Don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise.”
“Thanks Gabe,” she says, the goofy smile plastering on her face at his heartfelt compliment. “That…that really means a lot to me.”
“It should,” Gabe tells her, reluctantly pulling his hand away again. “I wouldn’t have said it if it wasn’t the absolute truth. Just forget about Vegas and the Rothswells and continue onto the next case.”
Tessa nods and takes another sip of her drink as the conversation between them dies down. She may have already forgotten the Rothswells and was slowly getting over from Beau’s stolen win, but Vegas was still on her mind. It wasn’t just the city that occupied her thoughts, but rather, it was the small wedding chapel and the night she played fiancée to the man sitting next to her. That night was an intense roller coaster of emotions, desires, and confusion; it was a night where lines became blurred and questions began to arise at the nature of her and Gabe’s relationship. It was one specific little interaction that made Tessa not only sense a shift in their relationship, but triggered her to start over analyzing and over thinking every little action from their first meeting up until now.
“Nothing but the best for the most stunning woman on the Strip.”
“Alvin’s gone, you know. You don’t have to—”
He raises a finger to her lips, laying it softly against them as he gives her a smoldering look that makes her throat dry up. “What if I want to, Tessa?”
Tessa truly felt at that moment they were no longer pretending. The things he said to her that night with such conviction in his eyes and voice. The way he softly caressed and touched her with such adoration and tenderness. The way his breath tickled her lips and sent shivers throughout her body at their near-kisses. They were not things done by someone just “pretending”; no one was that good of an actor. However, despite his actions in the wedding chapel, there was one moment that made her second guess herself completely. Just as she was about to admit her feelings for him, he brusquely cut her off and completely changed the direction of the conversation. What punctuated that gut-wrenching action was him dropping her hand quickly, as if he had been burned by her touch. The cocktail of mixed signals made her head pound in dizzying confusion, and it was becoming difficult to ignore for much longer.
She glances over at Gabe, worrying her lip between her teeth and mentally debating whether or not to step into that territory of complete openness. She has a nice, working relationship with him, and she doesn’t want to risk making it awkward to be around him if he truly doesn’t feel anything towards her. On the other hand, she wants to know for her own sake of mind; she has to know if Gabe’s confusing behavior and mixed signals mean anything. They’re off the clock, away from the office, with no interruptions coming between them. It’s the perfect opportunity to air everything out, and hopefully come Monday, there would be no more confusion or misunderstandings.
“Speaking of Vegas…” Tessa mumbles, carefully avoiding his eyes. “I think we should talk.”
Gabe’s spine stiffens in alert at the sudden shift in her demeanor. “About…what, exactly?”
She takes a deep breath, knowing it was too late to steer this conversation in another direction. “About what happened at the wedding chapel.”
“Ah,” Gabe interjects, “that was some brilliant thinking on your part, with the rat and all.”
“That wasn’t the part I wanted to talk about.” She turns her head to look at him. “I wanted to talk about the whole ‘pretend’ couple in love situation.”
“What was wrong with it?” he asks her, his nerves starting to creep up on him.
“Nothing,” she quickly replies. “I was just thinking…what you said…” She takes another deep breath, preparing herself to blurt it out before she lost her nerve. “Did you ever have a moment where…you didn’t think it was pretend?”
Depends on what your answer is going to be. “What do you mean?”
“I know the whole situation was supposed to be pretend in order to get a copy of Lydia’s marriage license, but…some of the things you said…and did…” her ears grow hot as a shiver races down her spine at the memory of Gabe’s gentle caress on her wrist, the pure intimacy behind it.
“Didn’t seem like pretend?” he finishes.
“Yeah.”
“And what do you think?”
Tessa sits there silently contemplating her answer. Up until this point, Tessa never had any reason to doubt Gabe. He is a man who never makes anyone second guess his true intentions or meanings. Every word he speaks is nothing short of the truth. But his reaction on the Strip was the first time she questioned his true intentions. If Gabe did mean what he said, then why did he quickly divert the conversation and act like he couldn’t stand to be around her? Her inner conscience was waving a massive red flag in front of her, but when Gabe gripped her chin and turned her head to focus on him, she caught herself slipping back into the warm pools of his chocolate-colored orbs.
“I really hope you weren’t pretending,” she softly says, voice barely above a whisper.
Gabe feels his stomach lurch at her confession, and the corners of his mouth tug up into a small smile at her answer. Gabe wasn’t going to lie. From the minute she stepped into the office, he became fascinated with her. She was beautiful, but what caught his attention was the way she introduced herself to the others. She was the only one who stood up and spoke with such confidence and conviction about winning the partnership that he would’ve given the spot to her immediately if his name was on the building.
“That’s because I wasn’t.”
Her eyes widen. “Wh…what?”
His thumb skates over her bottom lip, gently tugging it downwards, her breath hitching at the intense, smoldering look in his eyes. “I wasn’t pretending in the wedding chapel. I truly wanted to tell you that you were the most stunning woman on the Strip because you were, and I will always think you’re the most stunning woman I will ever come across.”
“And last night?”
“I still mean it,” he tells her, taking his hand away. “I really do enjoy spending time with you, and I want to spend whatever time I have with you and only you.”
“Good.” Tessa covers his hand with hers, the electric current running between them turning into tingling shivers chasing each other up and down her spine. “Because I really, really like spending time with you too.”
The smile on his face grows bigger, turning into the most genuine one he’s ever had with someone else. Their fingers tentatively move and twist together, the air buzzing with energy just waiting to be released. A sigh of relief floods through him once he sees their hands joined together. He feared he overstepped that night in Vegas, especially since he was sharply reminded of how Tessa flirted with the fireman a few weeks ago for her eviction case. But sitting here now, their confessions out in the open, their hands joined together, made all of it real.
“So where do we go from here?”
Gabe furrows his brow. “What do you mean?”
“We just admitted we like each other, Gabe,” Tessa states like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “The question is, what comes next? Are we together? Do we see where this goes?”
Gabe bit the inside of his cheek at her question, the bliss from earlier now getting replaced with dread and guilt. He knows exactly what he wants to do next. He wants to invite her to his hotel room tonight, spend hours tangled in the silk sheets together, then wake up and do it all again tomorrow morning. He wants to take her out to dinner tomorrow night and treat her to the most decadent food in the city while he teases and touches her until she can no longer bear it. He wants to be openly affectionate with her in the office…and maybe do a few more things behind the closed doors of his office. But he can’t, and he knew the exact reasons why.
The first reason was the more obvious one. She is currently in the competition for a junior partnership, and he is the one overseeing it and potentially making the final decision on who takes his former position. They are co-workers, and while Sadie has no real binding rule that co-workers cannot date or see each other outside of work, Gabe knows there will always be a cloud of doubt and speculation hovering over Tessa if the office discovers they are seeing each other and she wins the junior partnership. Gabe was already beating himself up for what happened between her and Beau; he would never be able to forgive himself if he was the cause of ruining her reputation and the potential she has at becoming the next great attorney. How could he look himself in the mirror every morning if this blows back up in their faces?
But the less obvious reason was a hidden secret, one that he hasn’t shared with anyone else. It was the one reason that stopped him from taking her up to his penthouse in Vegas and doing all the things he fantasizes about doing with her. It was the one reason for the walls Gabe built up over the years that no one else has been able to break down. It was the one reason that prevented Gabe from crossing the lines he wanted to cross. As easy as it would be to cross them tonight with nothing stopping them, he knows he has to make the tough decision, not only to protect her, but also to protect himself. He just hopes it doesn’t change anything between them.
“As much as I would love for us to be together,” he runs his thumb soothingly over her knuckles, already feeling guilty for what he was about to say to her, “I don’t think it would be wise to pursue it.”
“O…oh,” the smile on her face falters at his stinging rejection.
“It’s not that I don’t want you,” Gabe quickly assures her.
“Sure feels that way,” she blurts out with a bitter laugh.
Gabe sighs and scrubs a hand down his face. “You’re stunning Tessa, and whatever would happen between us would be so goddamn mind-blowing, because I know exactly what I’d do with a girl like you.”
As much as his rejection stings, the dark tendrils of desire twist and twirl together inside at the sound of that highly promising and exciting invitation, the rush of desire making her shift in her seat at the tingling sensation. However, his tone tells her he was about to say one little three-letter word that was going to take the invitation back and make the rejection even worse.
"But...?"
Gabe shakes his head and averts his eyes from the pain blooming in hers. “We can’t act on it. I can’t act on it.”
“You can’t or you won’t?”
“I…can’t,” he relents. He untangles their fingers and pulls his hand back to his side of the bar, no matter how painful it is for him to do so. “You already saw how low Sadie’s own blood would go to push himself ahead. Just imagine how low the others would go if they suspected—”
“You and I were seeing each other?”
Gabe nods, a small twinge of relief pricking his heart at her understanding. “Opportunities like this bring the worst out in people.”
“Considering I just had firsthand experience on how shitty people can be, I do understand it.” She takes another drink of her Manhattan, the sting now turning into simmering annoyance. “What I don’t understand is why us being together is now such a big deal for you.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m just saying, you didn’t seem too concerned with people seeing us together or what they thought when we went to Hoi On and that business dinner you specifically invited me to,” Tessa shrugs. “I’m just curious about the change of heart all of a sudden.”
“I didn’t have a change of heart. Those situations were entirely different.”
“Different how?”
Gabe pauses for a second to gather his thoughts. He had to tread lightly going forward, or else any chance the two of them had with each other in the future was going to be destroyed. “When I invited you to Hoi On, the other associates weren’t in the office. I knew Aislinn wasn’t going to say anything to Sadie, so no one was going to question why I brought you there.”
“And the business dinner?”
“It truly was supposed to be a business dinner and an opportunity for you to network yourself,” Gabe admits. “I didn’t know beforehand that he was going to cancel on me, and as far as the office is concerned, no one knows that he canceled on me, so everyone still suspects the three of us had that business dinner.”
“But then…oh…” Tessa trails off, another wave of disappointment crashing into her chest. “I get it.”
“You do?”
She nods. “You’re embarrassed to be seen with me. I get it. The senior associate and the top senior partner being seen together would hurt your image with the other partners.”
A tinge of frustration punches his gut. “That’s not what I mean. I’m not embarrassed to be seen with you. If I was, I wouldn’t have invited you to join me at the lake.”
“Good point,” Tessa tells him. “You certainly didn’t mind taking me out to the lake last night with Sadie and the other associates sitting around.”
“That was different too,” Gabe bluntly responds. “You wouldn’t understand.”
“Then help me to understand,” she sighs, exasperated.
“There’s no point in tell you,” Gabe shoots back. “You’re intelligent and observant, Tessa. You know exactly why we can’t pursue…whatever there is between us.”
“The only thing standing in the way of pursuing whatever is between us is you,” Tessa points out.
He runs his hands through his disheveled hair again. “It’s not that I want to stand in the way of us. There’s so many reasons on why we shouldn’t pursue this.”
“Well, so far, you haven’t given me one that we can’t find a way to work around. So please enlighten me, Mr. Ricci,” she crosses her arms over her chest and gives him a hard stare. “Is your reasoning really about the partnership and my reputation, or is it about something more?”
As Gabe sits there in silence, Tessa’s mind flashes back to their previous interactions. Last night was the most unguarded she has seen Gabe since she started working at McGraw Byrne. The business dinner was the first time the two of them ever got physically close to each other. Vegas was the first time the two of them were fixing to jump across those boundaries and become one. But each time, Gabe pulled back, and his action spoke volumes. And with the way Gabe was currently avoiding meeting her gaze head on and how his fingers are tightly gripping his empty scotch glass makes the light bulb go off in her head. There was another reason Gabe was hiding, one that has to do entirely with himself. She just has to hope that she is important enough for him to be honest with her.
“Well?”
Gabe sighs. “It really is about the partnership,” he lies, firmly keeping his gaze locked on the bar top. “The partnership is a once in a lifetime opportunity, and you shouldn’t waste it or throw it away.”
The air turns icy and frigid at his words. Tessa grabs her clutch off the bar top, knowing there was no more reason for her to still be around. “You may be able to bullshit other people, Gabe, but you’re not going to bullshit me. You and I both know this is more than just the partnership, and out of respect for your privacy, I’m not going to pry. Only you can make the decision to share it with me, but until you do, I think it’s best to forget whatever we feel for each other.”
Tessa gives his hand a soft pat before downing the rest of her drink and sliding off the bar stool. Before she could go far, Gabe’s hand reaches out and wraps around her wrist.
“Tessa…”
“Don’t worry about it, Gabe,” she says, gently prying his fingers off her wrist. “I’m honestly a little hurt and disappointed that you can’t be honest with me, but I’m not mad at you.” She places a comforting hand on his shoulder. “I really do like you, Gabe, but I also like and respect myself too much to go after someone who isn’t as crazy about me as I am about them, nor will I go after someone who keeps pulling back when I want to get closer.”
“That’s not—"
She ignores his plea, digging into her clutch and pulling out a platinum-looking card. “You know where to find me when you make up your mind and have an answer for me, but don’t expect me to be waiting around forever for it.”
She places the card down on the bar top; with a sad smile, she brushes past him and heads out of the hotel bar, the tears stinging the corners of her eyes. Gabe watches her figure retreat until she disappears behind the gilded elevator doors.
“Dammit!” he slams a fist against the bar top. The empty glasses jump a little at the impact, but what catches his attention was the quick flash of light reflected on the platinum card as it jumped into the air. Gabe reaches out and slides it towards him, his spirits deflating even more when he sees what she left.
The spare key to her room.
To anyone else, it may be just a room key, but Gabe knows that it is so much more meaningful than that. It symbolizes the key to her heart and the key to their future together, a key that would only work for a short amount of time until Tessa closes both of those doors on him. The decision to walk through those open doors was entirely in his hands, but before he could do that, he has to make one other decision. The time had come for him to do the one thing he has avoided doing for years, the one decision he found easy to avoid until tonight.
It was time for him to confront himself and his fears.
__________________________________
This was going to go up a lot sooner, but because my job decided to go through some technology changes recently, it meant something that previously worked is now broken and no longer works. Unfortunately, that was me this time around, so my usual break times where I work on stories was used to help fix what someone else broke. 
Sorry about the delay, but I really do anticipate part 2 being uploaded soon, much sooner than LOA coming back from its hiatus.
For all of you who have read this story and made it this far, thank you so much for your support! It means more to me than you could ever imagine!
I love you all so much!
Second Chance Tagging in case Tumblr becomes Tumbroke again:  @choices-addict @choiceskatie @lady-calypso @chemist-ana @kat-tia801 @chrissythadon @nishas-paradise  @blainehellyes @mm2305 @suitfer​ @thegreentwin @pixelnutrookie​
117 notes · View notes
stellocchia · 3 years
Text
Crime boys angst? Crime boys angst. They are not giving me canon content so here we are...
It’s always from the Platonic Soulmates AU (and sort of a sequel to Bee Duo's case? Kind of. Same universe as that, but they aren’t really related). 
Quick introduction: 
The 3 type of soulmates are: Romantic, Platonic and Familial. When you have a soul bond you can feel the other person’s emotions. The stronger the bond the more clearly you can feel them. 
                                     The Once Brothers
-
Once upon a time, Tommy believed soulmates to be a wonderful thing.
He heard so many stories of people finding their fated person, someone who’d stay by their side and protect and cherish them forever. Be it romantic, platonic, or familiar a soulmate bond was supposed to be the purest form of love.
He believed in this even as everyday survival was a struggle and believed it even more when he met Wilbur. The two became like brothers in a matter of hours and no one was ever surprised to find out they were soulmates from then on.
They had so much in common, both of them sharing a desire for adventure, a rebellious soul, and a big heart. They cared for each other and for anyone else they considered family fiercely.
And maybe sometimes Tommy was a bit too hot-headed and needed Wilbur to calm him down. And maybe Wilbur sometimes let his worries get too much power over him and needed Tommy to distract him. But that’s what soulmates are for! They balanced each other nicely and were unstoppable as a duo.
Looking at his scarred wrist now Tommy has no idea where it went wrong.
Everything was fun when they started their small potion business and no conflict was truly serious.
Everything was fine when they spent their nights making battle plans, a proud look on Wilbur’s face any time Tommy showed off his ingenuity for battle strategies as his first in command. He let him down in the end, failing to predict a betrayal that should have been obvious to the young general.
Everything was sort of okay when Tommy spent his nights just outside Wilbur’s office door because his older brother didn’t want to be seen crying but he couldn’t bring himself to leave the other one alone in his moments of need.
The elections came and things changed. They were chased out of their own country, hunted down to be slaughtered, and drove deep into the woods. The two brothers were left with one life each huddling in a cave bloodied and bruised but still together.
Everything could be fixed still, of course!
Everything could have been fixed… but it wasn’t.
Wilbur slipped away more and more into his own mind, where Tommy couldn’t reach him anymore. He tried to. Time and time again he tried to reason with his brother, he tried to keep him from giving up. He invited more and more people into Pogtopia hoping that other friends and familiar faces could help him save his soulmate. Nothing worked in the end and, suddenly, Wilbur wasn’t there anymore.
Wilbur’s death was the worst pain he ever felt. Tommy saw the sword flashing in Phil’s hand and it was like his own heart was the one getting impaled instead of Wilbur’s. He didn’t even get to say goodbye.
Nothing was the same once his older brother was gone. He tried to keep going but he couldn’t remember how to live after spending so much time surviving and his other half wasn’t there anymore to balance his brashness with logic. He wasn’t there anymore to make him laugh and brighten his day. Wilbur simply wasn’t there.
But, looking back at it now, maybe things were still good back then. They must have been since everyone claimed him to be spoiled and selfish as soon as he stepped one foot out of line. He probably should have learned to deal with grief before trying to live again, might have spared him some mistakes.
He didn’t though, and he ended up getting exiled again. There weren’t any arrows threatening to tear apart his flesh this time, just a hand that wouldn’t leave his shoulder and the happy chatter of an amnesiac ghost. It was almost deceptively serene.
Tommy doesn’t like thinking about exile, but it’s not for the reasons that Captain Puffy seems to think. She says that exile didn’t make him weak, that he didn’t deserve what happened to him, and maybe he can agree with that. Maybe if he repeats it enough times he’ll even start believing it. But no, the reason why he hates thinking about it is that he betrayed Wilbur. And it was his choice, his weakness that let him believe Dream’s sweet promises, no matter what his therapist says.
He got rid of the signs of his transgression the best he could, but the knowledge that His name used to be etched into his skin will never leave him.
But he isn’t in exile anymore! He left. He left and he was free once more!
He didn’t manage to wrap his wrist up while with Techno, having barely enough materials to mend his clothing and make himself a new shoe. He wasn’t even sure if he wanted to at the time. It wasn’t until Phil made a passing comment on it that it became important. The comment wasn’t even mean-spirited, just something along the lines of: “Oh, you got a new soulmate mate?” asked along with a fatherly smile. He seemed happy for him, and Tommy only wanted to scream.
Doomsday came and went in a blur. War coming easily to Tommy, even with the loss weighting on him, he felt more like himself than he did in months. He was sad to see the country he’d founded crumble in front of him, of course, but there was also a certain sense of detachment: it hadn’t been his home in a long time after all…
The final confrontation with Dream was different. It was him and Tubbo side by side against the one that marked him as his own plaything and tormented him for longer than he’d like to admit. He wasn’t expecting to survive it, but, alas, things turned out in the boys’ favour.
Why did he have to ruin that for something as ridiculous as closure? What part of his life ever made him think that he would be afforded that courtesy? Dream didn’t even let him rest, finally reunited with his brother in his own personal nightmare. Tommy must have truly been a fool for believing that he would.
And now Wilbur is back! He is back and their bond is still as strong as ever, only now instead of safety and comfort, there is possessiveness and a warped sense of caring coming through it.
Tommy knows he should leave him, Puffy said as much while blabbering on about “enmeshment” and other fancy words that he’s gonna learn out of spite alone. Something about a relationship needing “clear boundaries” and how sometimes distancing yourself from someone is the “healthier option”. She’s probably right and he knows that. He knows, but his heart stopped hurting for the first time in months. He knows, but Wilbur was the first person to notice the scar on his wrist and get angry on his behalf. He knows, but Tommy never learned to let go.
He can’t even tell if it’s him or Wilbur who’s so afraid of being alone again. Maybe both. Maybe that’s why he’ll cling to this bond just a little longer. Just until he’s sure that Wilbur won’t disappear when he’s not looking. Until they’re both safe and he’s worthy enough for his brother to be honest with him.
He knows that he should leave, and he will! He will, but not now.
73 notes · View notes
loveylangdon · 4 years
Text
Go To Town
Word Count: 4.2k
soft jj x best friend reader 
A/N: I have no idea why but 'Go To Town’ by Doja Cat reminds me of JJ (listen it if you want to), so I came up with this lil scenrio based off the song but not really? but who doesn’t love a good dance sesh to tease a cute boy. Just some cute JJ love tbh, everyone has the angsty, hard ass jj heres a lil content smol jj.  This is my first jj fic so pls be kind. truly a white mans whore so i’ll include my masterlist for my other writings Xx
Tumblr media
*not my gif credit to owner*
y/n p.o.v.
“If you're down, boy, really down, baby let me watch you go to town” You and Kie screamed at the top of your lungs dancing on the Pogue. It was your turn to pick the music playlist for the day out on the marsh and you had more of an open love for all music. When it was your turn to pick the playlist it was a bit of everything everyone loved but today you just wanted to let loose and have fun. You vibed heavy with the reggae and soft jazz the boys usually picked or the pop-rock JJ chose, but you wanted to have more fun before the kegger tonight. Your vibe was usually infectious and you wanted the others to be able to let loose. Hence listening to some Doja Cat in the middle of nowhere with also the slight hope of catching JJ’s attention more so than usual.
Your cousin came down from the mainland and showed you some new artists and ‘Go to Town’ by Doja Cat was on her playlist which reminded you of your little blonde hair blue eyed crush. JJ Maybank possibly royalty amongst the pogues and rightfully so with his charm, good looks, and his ability to fix basically anything he was a guy every girl wanted to sleep with. But to you he was an angel in disguise. Glancing over at him you saw him smirking behind his beer bottle and looking at you intently in your swimsuit dancing with Kie. “Go down, go down, go down, go to town” You and Kie kept screaming out “and she shave it all off Charlie Brown with it” dropping down and dancing on each other. John B laughing and throwing his head back, Pope smiling like an idiot, Sarah refusing to dance provocatively with you two trying to hold on to John B’s arm for dear life. Today was gonna be good. You had JJ’s attention from the moment you stepped on the boat and that’s all you wanted even if it was because you were currently grinding with Kie. 
Together but not together, you and JJ were in this endless cycle of teasing and flirting constantly but today you were winning. Watching him while dancing on Kie you knew you had him wrapped around your finger. Making sure your eyes were locked for most of the provocative parts of the song or when you dropped lower than normal. Watching how his eyes get a deeper shade of blue and how he was holding on tighter to the neck of the beer bottle John B handed him before you guys anchored down. Smiling to yourself you turned and gave Kie your full attention again dancing and acting foolish screaming lyrics to the wise words of Doja Cat “If he don’t eat it, he a D-bag, He can use a submarine, I’ll call him seaman” 
You were kind of this untouchable girl in the group, maybe even a better girl version of JJ easier to tame. Young, wild and free. Pretty, smart, fun always up for adventure but you had the spirit of Pope calculating and thinking things through but you knew when to let go. The perfect balance, Smart and quick on your feet, great at getting out of certain situations you became the mediator for Pogues and Kooks. Not being much of either you were what they would call a “Pookie” in the middle, not exactly a full Pogue but not much farther from being a Kook but not good enough either. However the group accepted you far quicker than they accepted Sarah Cameron, pure at heart and no ill intentions just wanting to have fun, Plus it didn’t hurt that you stopped Rafe from attacking them the first time you met them on the island. After they knew you were badass and down to earth how could the 3 boys refuse to let you in their secret club. Kie joined later which you were thankful for, loving your boys endlessly for 4 years but you couldn’t say no to another girl to help keep these boys corralled. 
While being associated with the Pogues it didn’t stop Kook guys trying to get at you. You were invited on figure 8 anytime as well as the cut. Princess of peace some would call you, you could get Kelce and Rafe to back down from a fight more often than not. Rafe not wanting to get on your bad side because you had a fire in your eyes and he wouldn’t want to hurt his chance of possibly getting laid if the “opportunity arises” you would never but it didn’t hurt to make him think so. Being Pookie came with power. Being able to control Rafe meant power over the Kooks. Hurting you could hurt Mr. Cameron’s business in some ways, you didn’t have a big mouth but you never forget what happens, you’re a more credible person to believe than the Pogues if it came to spilling some of Rafe’s secrets. And Rafe never forgot that. So he played nice-ish when you were present. Plus it didn’t hurt that he was attractive. So what if you flirted and hung out with them once in a blue moon. Young, Wild, and free. 
Again though JJ, JJ Maybank was it. You guys were without a doubt each other’s person. You weren’t going to make the first move you were gonna let JJ do it. Watching him mack on Tourons hurt but nothing your friends and some fun couldn’t fix. You and him were endgame anyways so why fret over what’s inevitable. That’s what you told yourself. You were confident and you definitely had that boy wrapped around your finger. Knowing each other’s quirks, body language, food taste, being each other’s other half you guys had mastered for a couple of years now. Up until recently the tides have shifted your guy’s love for each other grew in a way neither of you suspected but it didn’t change anything. Maybe more lingering touches, a couple more conscious forehead kisses or escorts home. Yet the blue-eyed angel still couldn’t make it official so you did what you do best tease him any chance you got. 
“D to the TF, got your bf in my DM, got him all up in my hair” You make your way over to where Popes sitting pointing your finger at him to join you and Kie. 
“No-No” Pope lets out moving to get up, you wink at Kie who is laughing at Popes wide-eyed frantic figure who finally figured out what the songs about while trying to maneuver in the small boat. You and Kie finally get pope stuck between you two “cause I can’t believe my eyes and her man between my thighs” you and Kie keep screaming. Peaking over Pope’s shoulder you see JJ watching you “And it’s clean but messy like a pizza” you sing right at him making eye contact, you see the blue-eyed boy shift uncomfortably in his seat adjusting his swim trunks, eyes locked on you. You wink at him and see pink dust his cheeks as he clears his throat. 
Turning to John B with a smile on your face makes Sarah squeal, “My boyfriend too y/n” she lets out, fake shock evident in her tone 
“Sorry Cameron I don’t have a boyfriend so I need to steal yours” you giggle holding your hand out for John B who has his hand over his heart and an awe look on his face flattered you chose him. He kisses Sarah on the forehead and stands up leading you next to Kie and Pope “If your down boy really down, Baby let me watch you go to town” you’re back is to John B’s chest dancing to the beat yelling out the lyrics, you feel John B place his hands on your waist and see Kie trying to get Sarah to join you guys. 
You feel heat on your waist and it's not John B’s hands, someones staring at you, looking over to JJ you see him glaring at John B’s hands holding onto your hips, guiding you to the beat. Rolling your eyes at JJ you huff, only JJ would get jealous over a guy who has a girlfriend and still not do anything about it. Pope went to go sit next to JJ since Kie left him to drag Sarah to dance before the song ended. You leave John B and dance your way over to Kie and Sarah. 
“No, No, No” Sarah squeals when you grab her wrist and Kie grabs the other you guys get her to stand up and push her to the front of the boat for the last chorus. Squishing Sarah between you and Kie you guys are lazily grinding on each other with the three boys sitting at the front of the boat whooping and hollering at your antics “let me see you go to town, baby, go to town yeah”
Making eye contact with JJ again you notice his tensed features, his jaws clenched and he’s biting his lip, his hairs messed up and you assume from him tugging on it. His eyes snap up to your face knowing he got caught checking you out he smirks opening his legs wider as if daring you to go to him and do your worst. 
“Baby let me watch you go to town,” you say making your way over to the boys, John B’s eyes widen hitting JJ on the shoulder “Oh my god” Pope lets out 
You make grabby hands to JJ, grabbing his hand that was covering his crotch innocently grazing his chest making pope let out a whistle, JJ stands up immediately taking your hand in his smirking while a goofy smile graces his features. You walk him to the middle of the boat turning your back to his chest and wrapping his arms around your waist immediately, you can feel his breath against your ear as he holds onto you tighter. Rocking your guy’s body’s together to the beat, you lean your head back and whisper into his ear “It’s your one chance, baby, never or now yeah” you hear him groan gripping you tighter if possible. Giggling you push your ass against his crotch and hear him gasp “Okay that’s it” He lets out with a clenched jaw and you unravel yourself from him and go back to dancing with Sarah and Kie again “Go down, go down, go down, Yeah let me see you go to town” Screaming when the songs over and the next one starts to play you guys laugh turning around looking at the boys who just sit there or stand in JJ’s case with a shocked expression 
“What the hell is wrong with you guys,” Kie asks crossing her arms, “You’re killing the buzz” she whines while Sarah walks over to John B and climbs in his lap causing you to laugh 
Pope clears his throat and opens his mouth to say something but nothing comes out causing you and Kiara to laugh “Look y/n you broke Pope” and Pope looks offended 
“No, she didn’t,” Pope says but his voice cracked causing everyone to laugh 
“I haven’t seen y/n dance like that since the party with Rafe” Sarah comments teasingly and suddenly everyone gets quiet. Kie rolls her eyes at Sarah for even mentioning him 
“Okay, y’all act like you’ve never heard a song like that chill” you chuckle going to the cooler to grab a beer and take a drink
“No we have but like wow that was so-” Pope starts out with hand movements and everything but Kie shoots him a look raising her eyebrow 
“So what Pope?” She asks and you go to say something but JJ cuts you off 
“That was hot, like really hot not gonna lie I liked it, I liked it a lot actually” JJ speaks up from where he’s standing on the boat looking at you. John B hits him upside the head “Bro what the fuck” JJ lets out turning to look at John B
“Stop being gross” John B states matter of factly “They’re having fun they don’t need a perv ruining it”
You give them a confused look “Okay I’m going to swim, coming Kie?” You ask as she nods. Diving into the marsh instantly cools off your body, you hear Kie jump in after you. Swimming to the other side of the boat. The boys and Sarah out of view you hear Kie next to you 
“So JJ is still a dumbass” she huffs out rolling her eyes in the direction of JJ. Giggling at her you shake your head and she goes to speak up about his failed attempt to get down with you to Doja Cat when you guys hear JJ whisper shout trying to be quiet, you shoot a look to Kie and raise a finger to your lips telling her to be quiet while she nods
“Okay I stand corrected that was hot. Pope you should be worried about Kie leaving you for y/n did you see the way Kie went in after her” JJ lets out a whistle and you and Kie giggle quietly moving your arms around to make it seem like y’all are still swimming 
“Shut up” Pope lets out exasperated
“No Pope listen I’m serious that was so hot like y/n dived flawlessly she’s perfect and the way Kie followed right after her like girl on girl action it just-” 
You snorted looking over at Kie who had an eyebrow raised, you made kissy faces at her until she splashed you. You could imagine JJ using his hands to emphasize his point 
“You’re disgusting JJ” you heard Sarah let out which caused you and Kie to start giggling until you heard a splash of water assuming it was Sarah. You and Kie swam a little ways from the boat to not give away that you two were snooping 
“Great, you pissed off Sarah great going JJ” you could faintly hear John B huff 
“What guys I’m being honest, you’re gonna tell me that wasn’t even a little bit hot,” JJ asks and you can see his arms extended out 
“Okay JJ yes but we don’t say that shit out loud” you hear Pope mumble. Your head shot straight to Kie who has a shocked expression on her face at Popes sudden small outburst and then to Sarah 
“You little snakes you heard them” Sarah gasps out 
“Sarah shut up oh my god, it’s so fun to tease them” you flick water at her and head to swim back to the boat seeing John B and Pope join the girls in the water. The water had done its job cooling you off you wanted to tan. 
Climbing back into the boat you hear a whistle coming from JJ “Take a picture it’ll last longer” you let out reaching for your towel to dry off 
“Only if you let me take pictures of the entire view and” he pauses popping the ‘and’ while pointing his finger at you “you stay wet” JJ lets out biting his lip as you shoot him a fake glare. He’s reaching for your waist and you let him pull you to sit down between his legs 
You pout “I wanted to tan” 
“To bad come keep me company” he smiles pulling you down, kissing the crown of your forehead nothing unusual but it didn't stop the butterflies from forming in the pit of your stomach 
“How you feeling,” You ask him as he wraps a towel around your figure before wrapping his arms around you. Knowing he didn’t get in the water because of his recent fight with his dad. His bruises were taking a little longer to heal than normal and he didn’t want anyone worrying about him. You helped apply cream to them but he couldn’t stay out of trouble long enough for it to heal properly. 
“I’m perfect right now” he hums in content and you move to look up at him, his chin is resting in the crook of your shoulder and his eyes are closed, his arms wrapped across your torso holding you close to his chest. The sun is hitting his face perfectly making his blonde locks glow and there’s a sense of calm he holds. He looks content, at peace and all you could ever ask for was this boy to feel all the love in the world and a part of you hoped he felt that with you. Placing a soft kiss on his chin you feel him shift, you turn your body to watch the rest of the Pogues in the water. They’re having a splash war and you can’t help but let out a giggle at the girls trying to take down John B. 
“You missed,” JJ says 
“Missed what?” You ask confused eyes still on your friends in the water
“You missed” He lets out annoyed at the lack of attention you’re paying to him
“JJ what the fuck are you-” His hand grabs your chin turning you to him quickly cutting you off and his lips are on yours. 
Your lips melt into his instantly. His hand goes to hold the side of your face in his hand, tilting your head a bit to deepen the kiss. You feel like your heart is going to fall out of your chest. His other hand goes to pinch your ass as you let out a gasp he uses that as an opportunity to slip his tongue in your mouth. Attempting to fight for dominance you gladly let him win. He tasted like beer and spearmint with a hint of weed he probably smoked earlier. It was addicting. 
Pulling away for a quick second he groans, his eyes still closed you can see him rolling his eyes like breaking away from him was the end of the world. You place quick pecks onto his lips while moving to straddle his lap, you feel him smirk against you. Pulling you closer to him, he has one hand on your ass holding you to him and the other holding the side of your cheek to keep you close, you pull his bottom lip into your mouth sucking on it as he groans. Pulling away reluctantly both of his hands find their way to the bottom of your ass. 
Opening your eyes looking at him he sits with the biggest smile you’ve ever seen on his face, eyes closed, lips red and swollen. He looks like a kid in a candy store and you can’t help but let out a giggle. Placing your hands on either side of his neck you lean into him and place a couple of kisses on his lips he happily partakes in and you can feel his smile widening if even possible. Pulling away you’re met with blue eyes and a smirk. You lean up to place a kiss on his forehead as soon as you place it there his face nuzzles into your boobs and you can’t help but laugh and he groans “you’re so perfect, fuck” he speaks into your skin playfully biting your chest
Tangling your hand in his hair behind his neck, you gently pull him away from your boobs, he leans in planting another kiss on you quickly “I like this” he places another kiss on your lips “I like this a lot” he whispers to you as you break away for the third time. 
Trying to chase his lips with yours you nod at him “Yeah?” you smirk tugging at the hair gently on the back of his neck, tilting your head a little more back feigning innocent while he groans moving his hands to hold the side of your face to keep you from moving away any further 
Something flashes across his face you haven’t seen before causing you to furrow your eyebrows together and then his eyes go soft and the way he’s looking at you makes you want to melt into a puddle “Yeah I like this a lot actually” he breaths out in a sincere whisper placing a kiss on your nose, you scrunch it up as he places gentle kisses all over your face until you’re pushing his face away to stop him you guys are both left laughing, He plays with a few strands of your hair just looking at you as if he’s trying to remember every little detail as if he didn’t know it by heart already 
“Um what are you guys doing,” Pope asks from the side of the boat with a questionable look only Pope could make
“Pope what the fuck man” JJ lets out pinching the bridge of his nose glaring at him. You move to get up and grab JJ another beer, noticing John b climb into the boat as well. “Can’t you see I’m trying to make magic happen” JJ gestures towards your standing finger and you scoff placing a hand on your hip
“You’re gonna need a lot of magic JJ little Pookie here has a wide range of options” John B teases knowing JJ gets all defensive when your other affiliated party is mentioned the Kooks
“She’s mine and everyone knows it” JJ scoffs crossing his arms making his biceps bulge a little bit 
“My brother doesn’t” Sarah chimes in climbing into the boat next to you and you try to stifle your laugh at JJ fuming. Kie climbs aboard and starts arguing with JJ alongside Sarah about the logistics of a relationship and what that entails. You’re sure you hear something about ownership and women’s rights and you can’t help but smile at your friends being idiots
John B pats the seat next to him for you to sit down, clinking his beer with yours or was suppose to be JJ’s “Salud” he chuckles ruffling your hair “I think Pookie is finally a Poguie, we can talk about custody over him later” he jokes 
“No” you hear JJ say over the music holding his hand to Kie’s face to shush her while pointing a finger over at the two of you “actually, she had full custody the entire time” you hear JJ shout over Kie trying to shove JJ in the water 
“Whose pussy whipped now,” John B asks him raising an eyebrow making everyone burst into laughter and Pope lets out a low whistle
“I don’t know ask Rafe-” JJ started which earned a shocked expression from you that lasted 2 seconds and a knowing look from Sarah before Kie finally pushed him over the edge and into the marsh resulting in a gasp from him and a content smiley Kiara
“I’m sure Rafe would gladly go to town with y/n, he’ll take his one chance” Kie yelled towards him and a bunch of “oohs” come from everyone before she continues “Hmm actually let's put that on the playlist for the kegger tonight see what prince Kook wants to do with princess Pookie” She goes to put her hand on her chin pouting her lips earning a nod from Pope  
“That's it you’re dead” JJ pushes himself up into the boat and immediately grabs onto Kie throwing her back into the marsh, turning around he headed straight for Sarah 
“JJ no, JJ-” Sarah screams out when he nears her “John B I swear if you let him-” but it's too late JJ is holding her bridal style in his arms tossing her over into the marsh 
“Sorry Kook you’re related to the guy can’t have you spying on us revealing intel” He salutes the two girls in the water going to sit in between your legs on the floor of the boat, his back against the seat
“Yeah he’s pussy whipped” Pope states pointing a finger towards you guys, JJ fake glares at him taking off his cut tank that is now soaked due to Kie pushing him in. Hoping it'll dry before the kegger tonight, you wrap a towel around his wet figure playing with his blonde hair and placing a kiss on the top of his head 
“Jokes on you Pope” JJ starts shooting him a look “I’m about to be treated like a king” JJ leans back shaking his wet hair into your lap which causes a groan from John B who was in the splash zone “Beer me women” he shouts holding his arms out earning a smack to his chest from John B, rolling your eyes you hand him the beer that was originally intended for him. He raises the bottle as the girls climb into the boat glaring at him. A shit eating grin on his face “Salud” which earns a chorus of saluds back and a “how does he do it” from Pope causing everyone to burst into laughter while he starts the boat up to head back to the chateau.
The sun, the water, your boy and friends. Pogue style. 
______
A/N: this is my first jj writing and she isn’t edited v much I wanted to get it out bc this idea has been in my head and I think about it every time I listen to the song, and its on my summer playlist rip. This could be a two parter? the ending was kinda meh because I was torn between dragging it out and giving it an ending. Either way I hope you enjoyed it. Any feedback or commentary is welcomed my inbox is always open, I hope yall are staying safe Xx
1K notes · View notes
Note
Consider the idea of Lin /Bumi badly timed proposals"? (just a humble linumi shipper loving your fanfics)
Note: Here's my belated response to this prompt. It ran away from me again until I struggled to close the story out. Hope you like it!
One-shot Post-canon AU Lin x Bumi II
Also on AO3. 
---
Outside of the military, Bumi was known to be the spontaneous one. The Avatar’s child who was the most likely to get into trouble. Or get into an adventure, as his grinning father would correct. He was the kid who took quickly to throwing fruit pies to the air acolytes. He was the teen who travelled to the next city because there was a Pro-bending competition happening there. As an adult, he was also the one who tried (and succeeded in) applying for the United Forces on a whim.
It was not often that Bumi would plan for anything linked to his personal life.
This was why, on the weeks leading up to that Night (with a capital N), he felt out of his depth. He did what he did best and tried to plan as he would regarding a military campaign.
This was why he thought he was assured of success.
What he did not count on was the extraneous factors, which was their extended family and social circle.
That – and the weather.
---
“Booms -I’m sorry, it’s not going to work out.” Iroh’s voice crackled over the telephone. “That downpour wouldn’t make anything stick long enough to be legible.”
Bumi sighed as he peered at the window of Tenzin’s study. The waves did crash unpleasantly against the edge of Air Temple Island as the rain fell. “Well, we can still move it tomorrow, right? You and the boys are still free?”
“Of course, provided that the weather is better. As for our availability - ,” Whatever Iroh said was lost as the line crackled again as it was wont to do when the weather was poor. Bumi clicked his tongue. Tenzin really needed to have some repairs made in this temple. “- So after that, we can definitely pick it up for you.”
“Great!” Bumi could care less if they need to adjust the timing a bit – as long as it pushesthrough.
He did not need the details.
---
Or maybe, he should have probed for more details.
The retired commander saw that now as he watched visitors mill around Air Temple Island.
Various air acolytes and airbenders from the different temples now crowd the usually empty courtyard.
How was he to know that it was time for the anniversary of the return of the airbenders? He did not even know there was an identified datefor that.
Or maybe, he would have known had he listened to Tenzin’s lectures.
He scratched his chin, pensively, wondering if this might change anything when something cold and wet lashed at his behind.
“Hello, Bumi.” His sister walked over, a water whip formed at her side, grinning as she usually did.
“Mother said you shouldn’t hit people.”
“Mother said a lot of things that you didn’t follow.” Kya crossed her arms mockingly. She nodded to the entrance of the residential building where their mother stood, surrounded by her youngest grandchildren.
He understood. They never could begrudge their mother anything, especially now with her waning health.
A sea of green passed in the periphery.
“I see Suyin and her brood are here.” Bumi contemplated briefly if it would have any impact to his plans.
Kya commented. “Did they really have to be always in green?”
“Did you always have to be in blue?”
“Touche.” Kya shrugged. “Though, I needed to be blue to occasionally camouflage in the South Pole if I needed to be stealthy.”
“For what?”
From afar, they see Katara beckoning Kya forward from where she and Pema stood by the stoop of the house. “I’ll go get settled now.”
Bumi excused himself, citing some reason to check on something, which, technically he needed to do.
“Tenzin said nothing formal; nothing big. Just a small gathering.” The loud voice of the Avatar grumbled.
The clinking of metal was heard next before Bumi rounded the corner. “And yet, everyone is here.”
“Chief Beifong!”
“Avatar.” Lin inclined her head in greeting, with blank politeness on her face.
Bumi knew better though – the slight tightening of her jaw and the grip she had on her belt: oh, Lin was irritated.
“What’s up?” Korra toyed with the sleeves of her formal wear, obviously uncomfortable.
“How are your travels?” Bumi interjected, popping beside Lin before she manages any acerbic remark.
“We are travelling in style! I think I could get used to it.”
“I think you already are.” Asami looked on with amusement.
“You’re lucky,” Bumi pointed towards where Oogi and the younger bison were flying around. “Dad had to travel on a sky bison.”
“Mom said it wasn’t pleasant.” Lin wrinkled her nose.
“There! You! Are!” Bolin ran and huffed as he arrived before them, doubling over in the effort. “Wing and Wei just found where the food was being prepared, we can sneak off to get some before the– oh hello Chief Beifong!”
“I did not hear anything.” Lin looked skyward and waved her hand at them.
“Beifong!” Bumi quickly caught up with Lin, who strode off quickly when the teenagers started talking about food. “Are you on duty?”
“Yes.” Lin sighed, putting her hand on her hips then stomping, doing a seismic perimeter check. “I know, but I have to.”
“I’ll look for you later.”
“Alright. We’re a bit stretched – Tenzin did not give us the correct numbers of attendees, as usual.” Her forehead crinkled as she concentrated on the perimeter check. “Good thing the Fire Lord sent General Iroh and some of his men to represent their nation.”
“Oh, that’s what he meant.” Bumi murmured to himself.
Lin glanced at him in askance.
“Iroh.” Bumi did not want to expound further. Lin had a way of ferreting out the truth from him without seismic sense anyway.
Bumi accompanied her like a silent sentinel as Chief Beifong went about doing check to her team and on the island.
They have finally arrived at the main courtyard where the usually unflappable master airbender was fluttering about like a bright orange butterfly, holding several sheets of paper, which no doubt was the program for the day.
Lin groaned when Tenzin noticed them.
“Lin!”
“I better go ahead.” With one final eye-rolling, Lin left Bumi’s side before he could even ask where she will be stationed at the end of the program.
“Trouble in paradise?”
Bumi jumped a bit, startled by Kya once again. “Of course not, my meddling gossipy sister.”
She offered him a drink, which he rightly declined. “What’s Tenzin up to?”
The man was now talking rapidly to the chief of police. They were far enough not to hear them but near enough to see what was going on.
“He’s quite excitable.” The retired military man shrugged. “Thank the spirits for Pema, that woman is a saint.”
“You mean, thank the spirits for Lin,” Kya nodded towards the pair as she took a sip of her drink. “Pema was just about ready to rip her hair off these past days. She was looking quite frazzled earlier and after a drink or two, bam! Out tumbled everything - Tenzin was anxious and has been driving her nuts with all the prep for today’s celebration.” She raised a glass to the earthbender and airbender on the main event area. “But look over there – just a few words from our dear Chief of Police and the man calms down.”
Bumi could not help but tense up as he observed Lin and Tenzin on the platform.
As Lin continued to converse with his younger brother, Tenzin began to slowly deflate. A smile started to form on the earlier stressed airbender’s face and the corner of Lin’s lips upturned, a ghost of a smile.
“I swear – those two, I wonder how it would have turned out for them had they known this was going to happen anyway…” Kya trails off, as though suddenly realizing who she was talking to. “I mean – hey, they’re both in happy relationships and it’s perfect and -.”
Bumi swallowed drily, drowning out his sister’s voice.
He had thought about that occasionally, really. There was nothing to go on and Lin had been upfront about, well, everything so he knew where her heart is.
But, looking at the pair now, at the anniversary of the return of the airbenders, supposedly the pinnacle of all their arguments…
“Booms – don’t do anything stupid.”
Now that snapped him from his maudlin thoughts. “Why is it that everyone thinks I’m gonna do something stupid when I keep quiet? It’s a bit offensive, you know.”
“Bumi, I didn’t mean -.”
No matter, Bumi was adamant that his Plan pushes through.
---
“POP! POP! BOOOM! BOOOM POP! Whiiiizzz! BOOM!”
Everyone on Air Temple Island (and even those at the edge of Republic City) looked up to see fireworks littering the night sky.
“BEIFONG… WILL…YOU… ohmy sweet - is that a ring??? .. ME.” Suyin squealed as she read what the fireworks were spelling out.
There was a cacophony from the courtyard of Air Temple Island as everyone sought to find which Beifong was being proposed to.
From their perches around the island, Iroh and the UF men whooped in success of their mission tonight – deploying the firework proposal.
“OH-MY-BOLIIIIN!”
All eyes were on Opal who was clutching at a wide-eyed earthbender.
“What?!”
Various voices added to the din, shouting different things.
“Bolin did you really?!” Mako pointed up to the sky.
“What – no I did not. I’m not marrying – I mean,” Bolin swiftly turned to Opal. “I would like to marry you.” Then he shouted at Su and Baatar Senior’s direction. “But not now. One day but not now – I mean, I need to talk to Su and Baat – oh shit Su’s gonna kill me.”
Attention turned to Baatar and Suyin.
“Um no,” Baatar shrugged casually, an arm around his wife. “It’s not our anniversary anytime soon.”
Suyin was still being antsy. “Wing! Wei! Did any of you -?” She saw her twins wave up their arms in surrender, wildly shaking their heads as they each held a plate of food. “If that’s not you…”
“Kuvira and Junior –.” Wei.
“That is unlikely.” Wing.
“Huan?” Both Wing and Wei asked, everyone’s heads swiveled to the artistic Beifong.
“Excuse me.” Huan looked very offended, as though it was an insult that someone would be proposing to him in public.
Bumi’s face fell as the Beifongs present began arguing as to who the firework proposal was for and the actual Beifong who the proposal was meant for was nowhere to be seen.
Just then a soft squeal and a sniffle came from Kya’s side.
Pema was holding to her arm. “No-no-no – it’s for Lin, don’t you see? That’s why – Tenzin is leaving me.” Every other word was punctuated with a sniffle. “That’s why they’ve been talking over plans and that’s why – I saw them talk to Jinora the other day. Oh-airbenders-Tenzin is -leaaving me.”
“Ahem, I have an announcement!”
Now, everyone turned to stare back at the platform where Tenzin stood. Behind him, stood two more people - Lin Beifong stood in his shadows, arms crossed, a guard observing the proceedings, while Jinora stood to the side with a nervous smile, hands at her back.
“Ooohhhh!” Pema let out a wail.
“Shh, Pema!”
Bumi froze. There have been still some lingering insecurities that were in relation to his brother that would take a long time to tamp down. With the man’s whimpering wife at the side and his own significant other beside said man, it did not take much to wear Bumi down to his insecurities.
“This has been a long time coming and before anything else,” Tenzin paused at this to throw a significant look at his back. “I would like to say that this is no split second decision, we’ve talked about it and well –.”
No way he was going to let Tenzin take over his plan tonight.
“I will be stepping down soon with Jinora as my successor.”
“LinBeifong, will you marry me?”
Two voices rang into the night, clearly silencing any other words that might have been going on.
Bumi did not care for or did not mind what the reactions of the people around them were. He only had eyes for the earthbender who was gaping at him then looking back at the sky then back at him.
He worried the longer it took for Lin to react.
From his side, Pema sagged in relief against her sister-in-law while Jinora and Tenzin stood at the platform, greeting well-wishers.
Lin, meanwhile, was yet to do anything other than stand still.
“OH – we forgot the most eligible Beifong of today!” Bolin stated the obvious, pointing to the sky and back at Chief Beifong on the stage.
“What are you doing, go get her.” Kya nudged him from the back.
Bumi ran to the stage, almost tripping on his formal robes. “Lin – I’m so sorry – I didn’t think it would be this public – I -.” Lin hated public displays. “I ain’t doing this to pressure, I -.”
Lin gripped his arm to stop him from speaking.
The crowd went silent as Suyin could be heard shushing everyone (“Quiet! We need to hear what her answer is!”).
Bumi’s heart sank as Lin pulled away from him.
This is it. The Rejection.
He could only look to the ground, unwilling to face family, friends and even his former colleagues in the UF.
Suddenly there was a rumble on the ground as Lin extended a leg in front of her and she raised her arms slowly with a grunt.
“YES – BUMI – I – WILL – dear Agni – Liiiin is marrying Bumi!” Su’s shrill voice read out the words etched on the courtyard.
Tenzin groaned, mumbling about the destruction of his courtyard.
“Shut it, airhead. That courtyard has seen worse when you broke up with -.”
Nope, he did not want to hear about their break-up and so Bumi took Lin in his arms and planted a nice long kiss to seal the deal.
He pulled back and was met with a large grin on Lin’s face.
It might not have worked as he expected or planned it to be but at least, he could honestly say that it was -
Mission accomplished.
20 notes · View notes
Text
handmaid - 18
PAIRING: mob!sebastian stan x ingenue!reader
WARNINGS: age gap
A/N: someone last chapter said y/n was like cinderella and now i can’t forget it. i just love that movie, it’s such a good live-action remake. hope you enjoy this chapter xxx
NEXT CHAPTER
Tumblr media
    - Gwen, you don’t need all of this. - half the staff of the penthouse was carrying bags and more bags into the lift that was almost filled with what looked like the full contents of two medium sized bedrooms. - It’s only for three weeks, Gwen. Besides, it’s freezing cold you won’t need a bathing suit. 
    - What if dad takes me to the Caribbean for New Years? - she crossed her arms, still pulling more and more clothing off her chest of drawers making the room look more messy than a bin area. Y/N sighed, grabbing some clothes and starting to fold them, placing them on the bed. - I have to be prepared, Y/N. People cannot see me looking less than. 
   - No one would see you as less than, Gwen. - probably over the top but never less than, Y/N thought to herself. - I don’t think all of this is gonna fix in the car. You’ll probably need to put some in the front and back seat. 
   - That is a great idea. - she closed the drawer with her feet. - You can go tomorrow so we have more space in the car today. 
   - But ... Gwen.
   - You are so smart. - the heiress patted her shoulder, handing her one of her brand named luggage. Y/N just sighed, it was probably alright to go tomorrow but that meant she would miss the decorating of the big Christmas tree in the big lobby. But then again, it was Christmas, the time to think of others and if bringing the entire wardrobe made Gwen happy, then Y/N was happy.
With two luggage bags hanging from her arms and one being held in her arms, she adventured herself into the staircase. However, due to the fact her sight was obstructed by the amount of suitcases, her feet tripped over each other and soon enough she felt herself flying towards the ground. She awaited the impact but instead someone grabbed her by her arms, the only impact felt being the sound created by the bags as they hit the floor in loud bang noises. 
   - Slow down, little angel. - she bite on her lip, recognising the voice. - You could’ve hurt yourself.
   - Just some last minute packing. - Y/N jumped off his arms onto the marbled floors, straightening the fabric of her dress with her hands. 
   - Doesn’t look very last minute. - he commented. - Three weeks, huh? That’s a bit long without seeing your pretty face around. 
   - You should be saying three weeks without seeing your wife to be will be long. - she handed one of the valets Gwen’s bags before she came downstairs and started panicking. 
   - You shouldn’t lie during Christmas. It’s Jesus birthday. - he chuckled, immediately returning to his regular stoic presence once Gwen came down the stair holding another bag. - Genevieve, my whole staff should not be packing the car. 
   - Not your whole staff besides if you need anything ask Y/N, she’s still staying here for a day longer. 
   - Gwen needs space in the car. - Y/N spoke up and before Sebastian could argue her own selflessness, she, along with several bags and Gwen, were already going down in the lift to the entrance where several staff where waiting with golden rolling cages to put all the luggage in so it could be hauled easily into the car. As everything got settled and placed, Y/N peaked her head into the window. - Are you sure you’re alright going on your own?
   - Yes, Y/N. You can go now, I’ll send the car for you tomorrow.
Y/N stepped back, waving goodbye as the car drove the heiress back to her family home. Sure, deep on the inside where no one but herself could see it but her, she was grieving losing what they did just before Christmas Eve. The decorating of the tree where she could put her very old yet near and dear precious ornament on the tree, the baking of the dough for the sugar cookies so they could be baked tomorrow but Christmas was not about Y/N, it was not about just one individual, it was about being there for those you loved and despite all, Y/N loved Gwen as much as a friend could ... sadly, she might also love her husband to be. 
As the car disappeared in the horizon, Y/N returned to the lobby, smiling at the lobby staff before she entered the lift which took her back to the penthouse. She had to admit the penthouse looked beautiful in the Christmas spirit. As she noticed the Christmas tree by the piano, an idea came into her mind and like a flash, she went into her bedroom, grabbed the red box and returned to the living room. Her hands delicately opened the box, staring at the still intact by time golden ornament. In her wildest fantasies as a child, she dreamed of marrying a prince, living her own life in her own little kingdom and pass the bauble down to her offspring. Yet those were childish fantasies and every once in a while, people need to grow and get newer fantasies. 
   - Leaving the room will not stop me from arguing with you, angel. - she held the ornament to her chest, softly turning on her feet to see Sebastian standing there, looking at her with a teasing smile. - She doesn’t need all that luggage. 
   - It’s alright, Elias said he’d drive tomorrow. 
   - What do you have there? - he pointed at her red glossy box, noticing the gold written Cartier on top. - A present from Gwen?
   - Not quite. - she opened the little drawer, holding onto the golden string of the gold bauble. - Mr. Forrest gave it to me when I was little. I always put it on the Christmas tree on the 23rd. 
   - You sure you don’t want me to drive you there myself? I’m sure if ...
   - I don’t wanna bother you or the staff. They deserve a Christmas break too.
   - I don’t know if it helps but ... - he stepped next to her. - You can always put it on our Christmas tree. 
  - Why don’t you put it? - she handed him the bauble and he probably would’ve said no, had it not been by the soft smile and hopeful nature her shining eyes had as she held the string. Sebastian merely smiled back, putting the ornament in the first free branch he saw, something he hadn’t done since he was a young boy. - It looks lovely. Doesn’t it?
  - You find beauty in everything, angel. - his eyes glued on the golden necklace that was always wrapped around her neck which somehow seemed to glisten even more than before. - You know, you never really told me about that little necklace you lost when we first meet. 
  - Oh ... it was my mother’s. - she smiled. - It’s been with me for ages. It’s a robin you know? The bird. When I was a little girl I used to think that was her name, Robin. 
  - My father used to know someone named Robin. Peculiar name, isn’t it?
  - Yeah, I always wonder about them during the holidays. Do you not ... wonder about your parents that is?
  - My father and I didn’t have the best relationship but I do miss my mother. She passed away a long time ago but ... she used to have the best sugar cookie recipe. 
  - You don’t mean to tell me the mob boss cooks. - she poked his shoulder playfully. - You ought to teach me someday. 
  - Of course, now go pack. 
Y/N had spent most of the day packing, deciding what to bring and what to show to the house staff. Not that she had a lot that she could show for but she wanted to bring the dress Sebastian gave her to show to the maids of the kitchen. Also because it had quickly climbed up to be one of her favourite gowns even with all the hand me downs from Genevieve.
She had fallen asleep mumbling Christmas carols, her mind going to one of her favourite time of the years and to the smells of cooking in the kitchen. She woke up with an unusual cold rushing down her spine. She popped her head from under the covers, eyes gazing at the outside of the Upper East through her window only to see it fully covered with lots and lots of fluffy snow. Oh no.
She rushed down the stairs like a mad men, punching the button of the lift which seemed to take ages to arrive and even longer to reach the lobby. She ran to the doors, pushing it open to the see the very busy Upper East Side with nothing but people walking. 
   - I’m sorry, sir. Are any cars leaving? - she asked the valet outside the door
  - Not today, Miss. All the streets are blocked. Pretty bad blizzard last night. 
  - Oh ... - if her heart could physically break, it had just broken. - Thank y ...
  - MISS Y/N. - one of the bodyguards rushed after her. - You almost gave us a fright, you could’ve gotten hurt. 
  - There’s no cars leaving. - she spoke with the weight of the world on her voice, following the bodyguard onto the living room. Most of the staff was gone and only essential and in-house living staff was in, mostly cooking for the holidays. 
  - Angel, are you alright? - Sebastian showed up from her left, still dressed in what looked like his sleeping clothes. 
  - There’s no cars leaving NY. - Y/N didn’t dare look anyone in the eyes, afraid her overwhelming sadness would manifest into tears if she dared to do so. - The blizzard ... nothing’s leaving ... I can’t go home. 
  - Nonsense. There must be something leaving. - his hand rested against her shoulder which was rather cold due to the contact with the cold weather outside. - Why don’t you go with Amelia and have something to eat? We’ll figure it out. 
  - Yes, come Miss Y/N ... - Amelia put her hands in the small back of Y/N. - I’ll make you some warm tea before you get sick. Come on.
Y/N was rushed into the kitchen by the cook while Sebastian grabbed his phone. Surely something had to be working, it wasn’t like she could walk what would regularly be a half an hour ride, she would freeze to death. No planes or personal flying vehicles were clear for take off and no cars or drivers were being allowed to drive.
  - Angel ... - he called out for the young girl who looked bluer than night ice. - Why don’t you go and take a warm bath while I figure this out?
  - Come along now. - Amelia pushed her off her seat before she could rebuff him. As the two disappeared into the hallway, Sebastian called out whatever he had left of staff which wasn’t too much. Luckily the stores were open and brave souls could adventure themselves into walking into them.
  - Right, you all have exactly one hour to turn this house into a Christmas paradise. Food, carolling, movies, all of it. It’s an order. Now go.
tag list: @lilya-petrichor @xoxohannahlee @irespostthingsiwanttoseelater @nikkipea @madisonpillstrom @cevans98 @thelostallycat @sideeffectsofyou @anxiousdreamersworld @captainchrisstan @lookiamtrying @sarge-barnes-sir​ @stuffforreferences​ @thebadassbitchqueen
351 notes · View notes
izukyu · 4 years
Text
monster, monster high - vampire! izuku x reader.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
pheww s/o to my nonexistent attention span for making me take at least a month to write this ! i busted out my lovecraft books for inspo, so i hope you enjoy this lil collab @sourbkg , @katskidon , & i put together!
emmie did a vampire shinsou fic, go check it out!
☆ミ pairing - vampire! izuku midoriya x reader.
☆ミ word count - 3.6k
☆ミ warnings - mentions of death, blood, suggestive content, and a feeble attempt at descriptive writing.
✧*̥₊˚‧☆ミ  ┊ running into your long-lost childhood friend and confronting a highly-marketed cryptid was sadly not in your bucket list for visiting your hometown, but a little thrill never killed anyone, right?
Tumblr media
summer nights were always, without fail, crisp and melancholic.
once upon a time you would stroll fearlessly through the woods in pursuit of amusement, arm in arm with your freckled comrade. ironically enough, the creaking of oaks and whistles of the wind lost their unnerving effect whenever you ran through the forest with scaredy-cat izuku. his nervous gulping and wandering eyes fed your adventurous spirit—an insatiable hunger for cracking the boy out of his shell grumbled inside your soul each day you’d spend together.
until he disappeared, victim to the summer lament of the ancient woodland behind your backyards.
wherever he was, you hoped he was okay; you hoped izuku would be well and healthy under the moon-cursed stars.
“i wasn’t expecting you to come back any time soon,” inko laughed, her emerald eyes far from how they used to be before. even when you’d be troublemakers with her son, her face remained free of wrinkles or stress—if anything, all your evil doings brought a smile to her face.
now her eyes, body, and mind seemed to push the boundaries of exhaustion.
you managed to give her a smile, your eyes focused on the trail of steam leaving the cup of tea she had fixed for you. “i would never leave you alone on a day like this, inko-san - you’re not alone.”
inko sipped on her own cup of tea, looking out the window that gave her but a sneak peak of the holt beyond her backyard. “thank you, honey.”
in a silence that spoke for itself, you enjoyed a nice beverage with your late best friend’s mother, even though that same title made you frown. it had been years since izuku vanished into thin air, and yet you couldn’t come to terms with the possibility that maybe, just maybe, he was no longer well and healthy.
“i mean it, thank you for visiting. it’s been… lonely around here,” she chuckled bitterly, standing up from her seat to retrieve something from her crowded kitchen. spices, books, and the same cookie jar izuku would always rob from still rested on the counter. except instead of mouth-watering sweets, a bouquet of gorgeous lilies adorned the jar.
somewhere in your mind you could hear your green-haired dork gushing about the flowers. his passion for nature and everything surrounding him still resided in your heart.
slowly, you finished the last drops of the warm drink, savouring the love behind it before speaking up again. “inko-san, you practically raised me as if i were your own, if anything i owe it all to you!”
at your remark, a heartfelt giggle escaped from inko’s throat. “couldn’t help myself, not when you were such a kind kid! i am very grateful for all the help you gave izuku, you really pitched in with his confidence.” she crouched down to retrieve a tray from the oven, her green oven mitts holding the pastries to the small dinner table. “plus, i knew i had to take good care of you when izuku declared he would marry you when older - i still remember that day.”
although her words pierced through your heart, your smile remained intact. “how could we ever forget? for such a small, shy boy, he sure had some spirit in him, he ran off while we were baking together and came back with bloody hands and a tear-stained face.” you sighed at the memory, reminiscent of the tug your heart felt at the sight. “the roses he brought with him were pretty, but it seems he forgot those have thorns. so much for being a plant nerd.”
“and then as i was cleaning the cuts he stood on the couch and declared he would have your hand and build you a house of flowers in the woods!” inko brought her hands to her face, her hot oven mitts akin to her son’s own warmth.
in spite of the sweet memory, a bitter feeling prodded at your heart. izuku never made promises he couldn’t keep—even as a kid, he took pride in his honesty.
“sheesh, he sure was a bold kid.”
“says you! gosh, you were fiery and unpredictable. can’t say your nature never took me aback, it was like you always knew something no one else did… always plotting ahead of everyone.”
you didn’t have the heart to tell her that was the case right now. “good thing i grew out of it, i am no longer an irrational child - i am a responsible adult who pays taxes.”
inko shook her head, serving you one of her delicious pastries. “one does not grow out of their spirit.”
-
it was hard to convince inko to let you wander through the woods at the peak of dusk.
for some reason, even though you were now all grown up, it felt like she still had a say over what you did. nevertheless, underestimating your sly linguistic abilities was still quite a big mistake to make, and just a few words about nostalgia and bidding goodbyes was enough to put her at ease.
crocodile tears weren’t hard to deploy after years of practice.
what you told inko was partially the truth, following the trails of deer and overgrown flowers did spark a sense of homesickness in your aching heart.
the sun gifting you its last cries of light never failed to make your blood pump faster, knowing soon only your eyes alone would be your guide was thrilling. however, as much as you prided yourself in knowing the woods like the back of your hand, something felt… off and you couldn’t quite place a finger on what it was.
no cicadas sang their perish song, and no howls resonated through the maze of plants. it was definitely odd, but you’d seen uncannier. even as a child, it wasn’t hard to discern between what a normal forest would be like and the one past your backyard.
izuku loved hearing your wild theories and encounters with the paranormal.
you sighed, all the bittersweet memories weighing you down. was it really that stupid to keep brooding about your dead friend? yes, your very much deceased companion—your best friend six feet under.
it was hard to convince yourself that was the truth.
izuku was never the kind of kid to get lost, or even worse, run away. no, something else must have happened. izuku would never just leave you like that.
once again, you sighed. it seemed selfish to imagine all he had in mind at every damn hour was you. assuring yourself izuku only acted upon what would make you happy was far from healthy or realistic. it was virulent.
a venom that only grew with each passing year—each new month without izuku’s dorky remarks, or his flustered laugh turning into a poison you could never cleanse. an aconitum, as izuku would say.
vexed, you kicked a pebble under your feet. screw the jinxed evenfall that took your childhood crush away. all full moons be damned, you wanted your friend back.
“goddamnit,” you scoffed to the darkening trees and yourself.
… and perhaps to another spectator, hiding among the rumbling shrubs.
with widened eyes and a jumping heart, you whipped your head around to the source of the noise. the dark mist did little to aid you in scanning the area for any threats. no footsteps, no growls, no nothing.
you refrained from making your presence known again, instead making the smart choice to retrace your steps back home. nostalgia wasn’t always kind though, and old echoes of encountering arcane, whatever-the-fuck beings in that same forest resurfaced to make your heart beat just a little faster.
to make your blood pump vigorously with panic and adrenaline.
your sweet, sweet blood.
with only a hiss for a warning, you were knocked to the ground by an unknown force. a shadow, if you will.
you cursed, struggling to pry the weight from your back, find an opening to scram, or do anything that would get you out of your current predicament. taking note that lying on your belly wasn’t a position you felt safe in, you kicked and grunted, boiling over the creep holding you down.
fruitless efforts aside, whatever—whoever?—was straddling your waist kept an iron grip on your squirming limbs with an eerie force. In spite of that, your fire to live till the next sunrise was hard to put out, “knock it off, i’ll rock your shit!”
for a moment, the straining clutch on your wrists relented, giving you a one-way ticket to struggle out of your vulnerable posture. you slithered away from your spot, not before having the penumbra meet your elbow with a brutal swing.
the thing had half a mind to groan at your attack, further fueling your instinct to flee rather than fight. almost like a reward for one-upping the oddity, the full moon shone down on the small clearing, dazzling enough to let you analyze what jumped you.
how come someone with a collared shirt and suit pants was wandering and pouncing on strangers at midnight?
“what’s wrong with you?” your own bark made the man before you freeze in his spot, edging him to curl up and hide from your eyes with his arms. the spike of adrenaline gave you more of a bite than you could handle; wrath, genuine panic, and an onslaught or two eager to jump out of your throat.
your eye twitched when instead of seeing red, you saw hints of green before you—mossy, glistening green atop the asshole’s head.
he seemed to notice where your gaze landed, making him flinch and, carefully, step back into the shadows again.
alas, you were determined and stubborn since day one, and you weren’t about to let this lead escape from your grasp. if the cryptid used his abnormal strength to jump you, then you must have used all the aching venom lying in your soul to pull the same stunt on him.
whatever this guy was, monster or genuine pervert, he was quite the newbie.
the man breathed heavily, a set of keen fangs greeting you from inside his mouth. his forest-green curls were sprawled across his forehead and the grass under him—sweaty and disoriented. constellations of freckles painted his face, creating a portrait of an all-too familiar face.
but what caught your utmost attention were his lambent eyes, emerald green, and cursed with a thin slit for a pupil.
breathless, instinctively, and hopeful, you whispered—”izuku?”
the man of the hour gulped, unable to take his eyes off your face.
you should have been relieved—ecstatic, even. your gut was right! izuku was alive; not sure about well and healthy, but at least he was in one piece before you.
still and all, the drool dripping past his lip was concerning, and his still predatory stare was still very much on you.
effortlessly and without a second thought, the shell that once was izuku flipped you over, making you hit the cold dirt once again. the impartial light of the moon made izuku shine above you, and as cynical as it might sound, the thought of dying by his hand didn’t sound half-bad.
except, fuck, you didn’t want to die just yet.
“deku, it’s me!” you writhed, clinging to the sliver of hope that you could turn this around once again. “just what happened to you? i thought you were dead - dead, very much not alive!”
your words failed to reach inside his humanity or common sense, and like parallels, his heavy breathing and your frantic panting synced together.
izuku dived in to press his mouth against your neck, stilling once his puffing could send shivers down your spine.
you waited for a painful bite, to bleed out and become the freckled monster’s feast. but that bite never came. “... izuku?”
for the first time since he could remember clearly, izuku felt truly at ease. your distressed heartbeat was a gorgeous arrangement for his soul and ears, he could feel you through the wild thumping of your ribcage.
instead of sinking his fangs against your pulse, he pressed his lips against your neck, as gently as a starved vampire could manage. in reality, the line between gentle and rough became blurry in his feral mindset; almost nonexistent.
one became two, two turned into five, and soon your neck was smothered with nibbles and gentle bites—intoxicating and fear-inducing.
“izuku, p-please,” you whimpered, unsure of whether your rapid pulse was related to the fright of nearly dying, or embarrassment of having your childhood crush scatter love pecks all over your collarbone.
his name falling from your lips in such a fascinating pitch made his pointy ears perk up, sparing you a single glance. “what’s the matter, clover?”
you could write down a list to respond. first, why the hell would he pull out your old nickname in such a bizarre scenario? second, and considerably less important, could you please get a rundown on why he’s half-alive and rocking vintage clothing?
clover, clover clover. oh my brave clover - was it?
not long after you met each other, izuku started to declare you his lucky friend. thrilling adventures always followed you, and surprisingly, no scratches or bruises ever came to him in your company.
clover, clover clover. awesome four-leaf clover.
it was hard to believe that same adorable kid was now older, alive, and humping your thigh in a subtle manner.
“you’re impossible, get off me!”
as if your skin was laced with garlic—your zany comparisons went a long way after all—izuku backed off hastily, giving you freedom to move once again.
his sharp nails dug into the soil, holding him back from returning to your warm touch. “wh-what’s wrong?”
“what's wrong?” baffled, your hand came up to cover your neck now growing dark in color. “minutes ago i thought you were dead, next thing i know is you’re pinning me down and m-making out with me - i’d say that’s what’s wrong!”
startled, izuku shook his head frantically, “n-no! no, no - that was not my intention.”
while he mumbled apologies over and over again under his breath, you tried your best to find your bearings once again. you were in the forest by your old house, that part was easy to jot down. it was well past midnight and someone tried to suck you dry, that’s when the situation started to get complicated, but you still managed to wrap your head around it.
you had trouble processing the last part though—the one in which that person who tried to eat you alive was none other than izuku midoriya, your late best friend and crush.
“okay, take a deep breath, ‘zuku,” while keeping the established distance, you tried to stop the vampire from spiraling into a panic attack. “let’s start from the beginning - why the fuck did you ambush me like that?”
izuku groaned at your hostile remark, his hands coming up to cradle his face, “i-i’m so so sorry! i was hungry and you were the first thing i found and i didn’t mean to-”
you cut his monologue short, “what are you?”
that last question rendered izuku silent.
a brumal breeze danced between the trees, making the leaves shiver and chant pleads of mercy—to judge or forgive the fiend before you.
although the clearing grew dim as the moon looked past the scene, you trusted izuku enough to hug him in the absence of light. as the darkness engulfed your bodies, your arms held him close to you.
izuku gave no response, not like it was really needed, as he settled his face in the juncture of your neck once again. “it’s been so long since i’ve held you in my arms.”
you held him tighter, “yeah, it’s been a couple years.”
as the sleeping flowers observed the encounter, the unvocal waves of a nearby stream drowning out your fears, izuku loosened up, no longer alert or seeking for something to bite and mark.
“i’ve missed you, dork.”
he sighed, placing a chaste kiss to your jaw. “a day doesn’t go by when i don’t think of y-you.” izuku pulled away from your embrace, split eyes gawking into your own. whatever had happened during those hours of darkness a decade ago had changed him, his memories of that day were nothing but a thick mist of confusion and horror-stricken wails.
funnily enough, izuku remembers convincing himself that you’d go save him that night.
izuku returned his gaze to the ground, “i’m scared, i don’t want to be stuck like this for eternity - i don't want to live a life w-without you! fuck, i wanted to grow old with you, but now i… i can’t.”
perhaps it was selfish and self-indulgent, but his rugged, vulnerable facade sparked a fire inside you. an old flame to protect izuku from all sadness and aching in the world.
a burning hunger to engulf.
pushing all common sense aside, along with sending inko an apology in your head, two desperate steps brought you close to his body again; wandering, bold hands held his pale face closer to yours, only a breath away from freeing those sentiments you harboured years ago.
the choice of whether to push past all boundaries and have his lips on yours or not dangled in your mind—get it together, make your choice. you could satiate your yearning and rather odd, burning desire to connect with izuku in a more intimate manner, or you could have some decency.
shockingly, you weren’t the one who had the final say in the current predicament.
izuku crashed his lips against yours, a fervid ache pumping through his inhuman veins; not for blood, but for you. although rather inexperienced, years and years of unspoken feelings manifested through your lip-locking, saying more than words could ever, and quenching your lonesome souls.
clawed hands desperately rummaged through your waist, catching up with each inch of your body; each curve, dip, and softness he oh-so had missed during his years of solace under the pulsating moonlight of the forest. ages of being apart had taken a toll on his no-longer beating heart, emotions spilling out as gasps and whimpers through the fine art of ardor.
almost as if his lethargic traits melted away at the hand of your scorching love.
sole lust could hardly make up for the essential need for oxygen, forcing you to pull back from the unexpected kiss—your lungs rejoiced, heart whined, and mind spinned in endless loops of need and lack of air. in spite of all, a single word tormented your consciousness in the best way possible, growing into a recurring mantra. “izuku.”
the preying breeze, angry riptides of a faraway stream, and the distant cries of insentient constellations all became nonexistent to you. as gently as izuku could manage in his torrid state of mind, he pressed your back against the nearest tree, never once pulling apart from the fifth kiss of the night.
five became six, then ten, until you rightfully lost count. your hands found their way into his silky hair, tugging at the curls each time izuku pressed his knee against your groin. nothing else mattered, just you, izuku, and the gentle hands of bliss.
izuku cursed under a strangled whisper, fighting the urge to fall prey to your intoxicating devotion once again. a nagging growl in the back of his head kept mauling his passion-induced thoughts.
he remembered why he was on the prowl among the weeping woods.
izuku was starving.
“what’s wrong?” your voice quavered, recovering from the breathless kissing in larghetto.
those honey-laced words died on air, a constant ringing blocking izuku’s hearing. while still relatively in control, he pushed himself away from your warm embrace, groaning at the unbearable sensory overload.
and then the ringing turned into thumping.
a familiar heartbeat reigned his senses, savouring the succulent blood currently dashing and staying warm for him to feast on. he already got a taste of your sweet love, heavenly would come short to describe how scrumptious your swollen lips had been—would your blood eclipse over it?
meanwhile, fear started to settle on your skin once again. strangled movements and rather loud snarls were not the aftercare you were expecting after all. much like how the entire scene had played out, his frantic movements said more than words could ever; you had to remind yourself this was not the izuku you had grown up with.
nonetheless, you had already made the irrational decision to make out with a bloodthirsty creature that night, what would one more baseless choice do anyway?
“hey,” you struggled to stay calm, your hand shaking as it sought his own palm, “‘i’m here, let me help you.” timidly, you pressed his fingers against your neck, a rapid pulse greeting him upon touch. was it foolish to devote yourself in such manner? perhaps, but it was too late to turn back now, not while his slitted orbs gawked at you once again.
not while izuku wasted no time in burying his face against your neck for the second time that night.
izuku mewled, his voice vibrating against your skin, “you’re too good to me, doll.”
the rest was a blur.
between feeling his sharp fangs sink into your skin, leaving a blazing sting in their trail, and rolling your eyes at the sensation of blood loss at the hand of who you once considered to be your soulmate, it was safe to say you were slowly losing grip of reality.
kind as ever, izuku held up your limp body against his, delicately relishing the last few drops of ichor your body could offer him without wilting away.
the two craters laced with velvet-red marked on your skin afterwards sent izuku on an embarrassed fit, almost as if he hadn’t been sucking on your sweet spot seconds before.
and with no moon to feed by, the vampire held you close to his chest, disappearing into the maudlin mist of the forest—never to be seen again.
Tumblr media
☆ミ Black Lives Matter Resources.
☆ミ check out the rest of my works!
☆ミ buy me a coffee!
☆ミ wanna get tagged in my stuff?
Tumblr media
general - @brattyquirks, @quirkless-fics​, @tooloudarts, @bringingpinkbac-k, @thewaterlily, @kittyatemytaco, @nyantodamax145, @iachan03, @imconfusedanditsok, @nishigo, @bakugo-baby, @lovingshoto, @cellotonin, @shigarakis-fifth-hand, @uwus-for-bnha, @trianglesareatheory, @lianatriestosurvive, @popsclique​
deku taglist - @babyishdolan, @allywritesimagines, @lmaobroccoli nice pfp lol
deku server taglist - @suckersuki​, @bakugoustanaccount​, @humanitys-hottestsoldier​ !
idiot kinnies beta readers 💝 -sol, emmie, @waddle-yee​, @heroprose​, @cherry-pancakes​ !
Tumblr media
168 notes · View notes
fleckcmscott · 4 years
Text
Another Decade
Summary: Arthur discovers Y/N's fortieth is just around the corner. He hopes to get the occasion right.
Warnings: Swearing
Words: 5,044
A/N: This request comes from @hhandley80​, who is an absolute sweetheart! Funnily enough, I got the request for this story and Another Year within a couple days of each other. Thank you so much for it! It was great to write.
If you have any thoughts or questions, please comment, feel free to message me, or send me an ask. Requests for Arthur and WWH are open! 
Tumblr media
This morning's therapy appointment had boosted Arthur's spirit. Left him refreshed instead of worn. Dr. Ludlow had given him a break from discussing his negative thoughts and various neuroses. Rather, she'd asked him what he wanted to talk about. What was foremost on his mind. And he'd spent close to the entire hour diving into what it was like to live with Y/N.
Having a person who cared about him was fulfilling. Beautiful. Challenging. Struggles inevitably happened but she attempted to help him through them. (A stark difference from when he’d been on his own.) The faith she'd placed in him by inviting him into her home was exciting.
Fears he'd never be worthy of that trust or such a good, intelligent woman did tend to eat at him. Especially when he couldn’t sleep or suspected he was slipping. But he was trying. Doing his best to learn every day, every hour, every minute. To alter his view of himself to include intimate partner alongside mentally ill loner. “I- I thought it would fix me,” he’d said. “It’s hard. But I don’t feel so bad all the time anymore.”
The doctor had complimented his resolve. Said he was dealing with all the changes as well as could be expected. If he followed his treatment plan, she anticipated he'd continue to do so. Appreciating the recognition, Arthur had wondered how to keep her praises close.
And now here he was. Experiencing the ordinariness of sitting in a diner with his girlfriend. Talking about their respective mornings. Sharing a meal. The crinkle fry he grabbed from the blue-plate special in the center of the table was soggy. The corner of his mouth quirked up as he dunked it in ketchup, a possible punchline coming to mind. If he could just figure out the right-
An inviting caress to the back of his hand brought him back to the present. He hadn't meant to tune out Y/N. With an apologetic grin, he pressed back into the booth's plastic cushions and took another drag off his cigarette.
“I was saying I need to head back to work,” she told him. A smile slowly spread across her face, until it nearly blinded him. “And that I can’t believe we’ve been shacked up for almost two months. I know it’s been an adjustment-“
“A good one,” he interrupted gently, interlocking their fingers.
"I’m proud of you.” The pink on her cheeks was faint. “I wouldn’t have taken the leap with anyone else. I can’t seem to get enough of your company, Mr. Fleck.” With that, she signaled for the waitress, retrieved her wallet from her purse, and got out some cash. Rising, she turned to Arthur. “Get the change for me,” she said, heading towards the back.
Her suede billfold was open on the table, her Gotham City ID card in view. He tentatively picked it up to examine the photo. Her hair was uncharacteristically flat, shorter than it was now. The flash had turned her lovely eyes red, and her lips were agape, as though she was in the middle of a sentence. A giggle escaped him. Frumpy. She was frumpy.
Reading her details, his brow quirked at her full name: “Y/N M/N L/N.” There was a nice rhythm to it, one that would also work with “Fleck,” if they got as far as he daydreamed. Then he saw her date of birth and stilled.
Her fortieth was in less than two weeks: 4/6/1942. April sixth. Shit.
He’d learned so many facts about her: the names of her nephews and niece; which college she’d attended; her favorite bands. She’d told him her birthday was in the spring. How the hell had he neglected to ask her the specific date? Awash with embarrassment, a hiccup left him and he covered his mouth.
The waitress returned with a dubious look, a receipt, and coins. As he counted out the tip, he calculated what he had in his own wallet and checking account. He’d scrimped and saved to cover the electric and water bills (though he knew he’d have to pay them in secret to avoid Y/N’s finding a way to repay him). Could he afford a decent gift, too?
Arm in arm, they walked back to Y/N’s workplace. She chatted about that afternoon’s court process, and he puffed away as if he was going to Hoyt’s office for an impromptu scolding. When they reached the steps in front of her building, she tugged at him until he stepped closer. “You’re so stiff.”
Putting on a half-grin, he leaned into her. “Don’t worry about me.” He stole a chaste kiss, one she tried to turn into more before he backed off. “I’ll see you later.”
When he got home, he didn’t bother to change into his thermal shirt and pajama bottoms. Relaxing wasn’t an option. Stretching and pacing the kitchen, he breathed in and out, in and out. He needed to focus instead of letting himself be thrown off. Like a good partner would.
Plans. He had to make plans. And not the vagaries floating around in his head of what boyfriends were supposed to do. Special ones. Personal ones. Ones that demonstrated the depths of his love for her. This was important. The start of a new decade. And her first birthday with him.
Unable to conjure other options, he grabbed the phone from the wall and dialed Y/N’s office. His leg bounced harder with every ring. He hadn’t yet spoken with Patricia, Y/N’s friend and co-worker. But he’d heard she was nice. Any suggestions she could offer were welcome.
Thank goodness she answered before he lost his nerve. “Shaw and Associates. Patricia speaking.”
“Hi,” he pushed out, fiddling with the phone cord. “Um, this is Arthur. Arthur Fleck. Y/N’s boyfriend?”
A smile lingered in her professional lilt. “It’s nice to talk to you, finally. But she isn’t here. I can take a message.”
“No, I know.” If he hesitated too long, he'd reveal his awkwardness. So he went for it. “Do you know what Y/N’s favorite cake is?” That question commenced a conversation that gradually became easier. Each sentence soothed. Consoled the irritation he’d aimed at himself.
Y/N liked hummingbird cake, a mix of pineapple, banana, and cinnamon. It sounded intricate and expensive. There was a bakery that sold it by the slice, according to Patricia. Y/N hadn’t disclosed what gifts she would fancy, but had said she didn’t need any knick-knacks, mugs, or other such trifles. As for activities, she was uncomplicated. She liked going to the movies and restaurants. Conversations and walks. The mundanity of domestic life, especially since becoming involved with him.
That lovely sentiment caused his eyelids to shut, an ember to glow in his heart. But it only confirmed what he already knew. “I want to make her happy,” he breathed. “I’m new at this.”
“We all were once,” she said, brushing his concerns off. “Arthur, she’ll love anything you do. Because you’re the one doing it.”
The kindness she was extending to him felt surreal. Not yet used to it, he tried to believe it wasn't a trick. He thanked her quietly, for her ideas and for listening to him. But as he was about to hang up, she gave him one last piece of advice. “Wear your button-up with the blue flowers. And your yellow vest.”
Blinking, he frowned. “But those are for work.”
Patricia laughed softly. “Yeah, well. She likes them. What was it she said? ‘They accentuate his sexy waist?’”
A burn rushed across his face and he rubbed his forehead. “...Oh.”
Well, that was a request he could handle.
~~~~~
It seemed as though newspaper adverts, television commercials, and even the damned billboards plastered around Gotham had an ax to grind. They all declared the same thing. Women needed to “mold their faces back to youth!” “Guard against aging skin!” Learn they could “look young again!” To be someone other than themselves.
Rolling her eyes, Y/N dropped the magazine she’d been reading in the trash can next to her desk. She’d be crossing into the “Fatal Forties” in a week. While she did use lotion before bed to prevent the formation of wrinkles, and the prospect of gray hair wasn’t one she relished, turning the big 4-0 bothered her less than she’d anticipated. Her looks were minor concerns compared to what she’d gained over the years.
The hardships she’d endured had mostly strengthened her. Allowed her, mercifully, to grow into a person who was comfortable with herself. It was said women were supposed to be set in their ways by now. And in many respects, that was true. She enjoyed her routines. She liked her career. She loved participating in life amidst millions of other people.
But meeting Arthur had changed her path. Started her on an adventure she treasured. A journey into actual partnership, rather than her earlier attempts to please and meet other’s expectations. Attempts she had failed at. Miserably.
He hadn’t cared she was five years his senior. Hadn’t hinted that he’d considered her a “spinster.” Never joked that she was an “old maid.” If she stood in front of the cosmetic counter at the pharmacy while he got his prescriptions, he’d slink up behind her and say, “You’re already pretty.” She’d never expected him to make her feel more desirable now than she’d ever felt in her twenties, stretch marks, moderately saggy breasts, and all.
During the past few days, she’d tried to piece together what he could have planned for her birthday. He hadn’t left any clues, though one night he had hurriedly tucked something under a couch cushion. He’d been a bit out of sorts, though. Biting his nails more than usual. Seeking greater reassurance.
She’d had plenty of good birthdays. There’d been parties and games. Presents. Hugs and well wishes. When she’d taken care of her father it had mostly been forgotten, apart from the cards she’d received from her ex-husband and sister. The passage of time had been marked by worsening dementia. And she had been fine with not caring.
In contrast, Arthur had stated he’d never known what it was like to matter to someone. Not until her. He’d told her he’d given Penny a blouse for her birthday once or twice. That had been years ago, however, before his mother’s reactions to him had gradually reduced to requests to send letters. Before her health had declined when he was a child and he’d had to take over every basic task. Before he’d become too exhausted to try.
Would it be fair to expect him to take much notice?
At the end of a long workday, she’d be satisfied with a quiet evening at home. Cooking dinner together. Drinking wine until she felt warm and fuzzy. Kisses exchanged here and there. Maybe some fooling around before she nodded off on the sofa with her feet in his lap. Such basic joys would be plenty.
~~~~~
The page in Arthur’s journal taken up by Y/N’s special day wasn’t atypical. He’d been writing about her since the grocery store. (“I wonder what her name tastes like. Less bitter than mine, I bet.”) Since they’d shared donuts. (“I shud have given Sara my number.”) Since she’d stared at him, then smiled at him, and he’d felt the whole world change. (“I hope Y/N likes the joke I rote for her. I practised it 100 times! Maybe she’ll let me touch her again. Shit. I’m nervos.”)
With it a mere four days away, there wasn’t much time left for gift hunting. So he pulled on his trusty tan jacket and headed out. He was unsatisfied with what his search had turned up so far. Flowers. Candy. Nylons. It had all been mediocre when she was beyond compare.
On the verge of desperation and distress, he finally managed to stumble upon the right shop. The name above the entrance, Nice Twice, was catchy. And there was a sign: “Personalization available!” Following a quick glance through the streaked shop window, he flicked his cigarette to the ground and opened the wooden door.
As he stepped inside a shopkeeper bell rang. The stench of sandalwood incense and mothballs was thick, causing him to wince. The place was overstuffed, filled with circular clothing racks, shelves of home decor and appliances, and furniture from the sixties. He tread along the faded, orange parquet floor. Squeezed between displays of bell bottoms and coats to reach a large jewelry counter by the cash register.
A man Arthur assumed was the owner popped out from behind a nearby shoe rack. He appeared to be what Penny had disdainfully referred to as a “hippie,” with his beaded headband and light blue jeans. When asked if he’d found anything he liked, Arthur answered, “Not yet.”
His shoulders tilted, drew together as he scanned the contents of the glass cabinet. Being able to get Y/N diamond earrings or a bracelet would have been ideal. He’d heard they were supposed to be symbols of commitment. Show her how important she was to him. But they’d never be affordable, even in a thrift store. There were some lovely brooches but they weren’t her style. She didn’t wear pins, anyway.
About fifteen minutes had passed when, at last, he spotted a suitable piece. The owner gave it to him to inspect. The heart, hanging from a long, silver chain, was a tad smaller than the end of his thumb. Purple, blue, and gold flowers, faded with age, were pressed under the pendant’s rounded, glass front. It was lovely, like her. And picturing her wearing it made his chest tighten.
The necklace was twelve dollars. For two dollars more, the heart’s silver back could be engraved. Arthur could definitely swing that. It took only seconds for him to choose what should be etched into it, having had his imagination sparked by a recent fifties sit-com. It would be ready Monday, the day before her birthday.
While Arthur retrieved his wallet, the owner asked, ”Hey, what’s your sign?”
Forehead furrowed, he tried to decipher the man’s meaning. He was sure he’d heard the question on television and in films. “My sign?” The man clarified and Arthur provided both his and Y/N’s birthdays.
The owner laughed. “Woo wee! That’s a powerful match.” He indicated a collection of astrology scrolls next to the register. “Your lady friend might like one of these.”
Waving dismissively, Arthur shook his head. “I don’t believe in that.” Seemingly determined, the hippie held out a rolled-up scroll. It was about the length of a cigarette, its title printed in a faux-ancient font: “Aries & Scorpio: Love & Romance.” Curiosity piqued, he pressed his lips together. “What does it say?”
“Only good things, man.” This was obviously a well-practiced pitch. And it was working The man retrieved a keyring full of unrolled, laminated scrolls. After flipping through the collection, he handed one to Arthur. He wasn’t the fastest reader, having had difficulties with it since he was a kid. But he scanned the page.
According to “the stars,” palpable chemistry existed between Aries and Scorpio. They were fun, passionate, and explosive in the bedroom. Snorting, he brought the scroll closer. “Your attraction to each other defies logic. Aries has a tough demeanor, but Scorpio brings out the compassion and love hiding underneath. Scorpio has an inner strength Aries finds irresistible.” Hm. What it said about Y/N was true. And she’d told him he was strong (which he didn’t really believe). He smiled, pleased this silly tract paid him such compliments.
He kept going. “As a pair, you are inhalation and exhalation in one. Two sides of the same coin. Aries is the sun to Scorpio’s moon.” Y/N was all those things to him. Even on days he wasn’t sure he wanted to feel better. Even on days it was easier to sink into the familiarity of misery than to strive for the unfamiliarity of feeling good.
It was after reading the final line that he nodded and dug into his pocket for two quarters: “You will be together for decades, even into the next life.”
~~~~~
Though she was standing in an overcrowded subway, squished between a man holding a dog and a woman using her as a vertical bed, Y/N felt giddy. Albeit tired. The day had been brimming with paperwork, phone calls, and running around. But it had started off well, and she was certain its upward trajectory would continue the rest of the night.
When she’d awoken, she’d discovered a pink envelope in Arthur’s place, laying haphazardly on his pillow. She’d boosted herself up on her forearm, ran her fingertips over her handwritten name, and taken out the yellow card.
There was a drawing of a man holding a woman by the waist. Lifting her until her hair touched the cheery, red “Happy Birthday.” The couple appeared thrilled. Taken with each other. And straight out of the forties. It wasn’t quite them, but it did reflect Arthur’s old fashioned romanticism.
No preprinted poem was inside. No famous quotes. Arthur had written a message instead. One which made her ache. “What do you get when you cross chocolat with something that goes thump-thump? A sweetheart. (That’s you.) My life is nicer with you in it. Even Gotham. I’m happy you talked to me. I love you a lot. -Arthur.”
He’d returned to the bedroom. Caught her mid-giggle as she’d wiggled out of her nightgown, hidden between the sheets. He was holding a mug. The same one they’d shared after the first of many lovemaking sessions.
Greedily, she’d ogled his damp hair and slender musculature. Light green eyes soft and serene, he’d sat next to her and pecked her cheek. At the flick of his gaze to her mouth, she’d flung her arms around his shoulders. Stubble burned her skin, her kisses to his dimples urgent.
“Wait,” he’d chuckled, putting the drink on the nightstand. “I made pancakes.” Even as he’d protested, he’d splayed his hand on the small of her back.
“To hell with pancakes,” she’d purred, pulling him under the blankets.
Work had been sentimental, which she’d neither expected nor wanted. Her new job would be starting in a week and a half. The small celebration they’d squeezed in served as both a goodbye and “Over the Hill” party, black balloons and grey streamers included.
Matt had been downcast as he’d shoveled red velvet cake into his mouth. “I’m sorry it turned out this way.”
A lame attempt to lighten the atmosphere had been needed. No one was going to start blubbering on her account. “You could come with me. Follow the conscience I know you have hidden somewhere.” He’d looked askance, turned towards his office. Trying to soften her joke, she’d patted his arm. “Don’t feel too bad. You could still lose the case.”
Settled on the windowsill, she’d gazed out at the streets of the city she’d grown to love. The city she called home, despite having spent only five percent of her existence in it. It was fitting to start this phase of her life here. The only period in which she’d felt whole, both professionally and personally.
A sheen had been in Patricia’s eyes when she’d joined her in the tight space, nudging her with her hip. “I don’t know what I’ll do without you here, accelerating Matt’s hair loss.”
“You’ll have to add it to your list of duties.” Elbowing her gently, Y/N continued. “I’ll only be a couple blocks away. We’ll meet for lunch. And you have my phone number.” Before her own eyes could water, she’d gone to her desk to cut another slice.
Patricia raised her hand. “You’re going to ruin your appetite.”
“Oh? Should I be expecting something?”
Finishing her own piece, Patricia crossed her ankles. “Arthur called for tips while you were in court. He decided I was an expert on you.” Y/N’s brows shooting up prompted a chuckle. “I didn’t give away all your secrets. Just some of your favorite sweets.”
The clench of Y/N’s throat was instant. And shame washed over her for assuming he wouldn’t plan much, if anything at all. He’d been considerate, even during tough times. Like at Christmas, which had been hard for him but turned out well in the end. He’d made it clear that what he coveted most, besides love and validation, was to be treated normally. Normal expectations were a part of that. She’d sought to give him a break when the benefit of the doubt had been what he deserved.
Y/N thought a bit. Surveyed the ornate woodwork in the corners of the room. Then she'd met her friend’s gaze. “Patricia, I want to spend the rest of my life with him.”
“Because he’s getting you cake?”
“I’m not that easy.” Laughing, Y/N sat on the corner of her desk. “Do you remember when I said I was almost forty and was going to grab what I want? Well, I’m forty and he’s what I want.”
Caution and kindness had softened Patricia’s concerns. “I don’t mean to be indelicate. But you’re his first relationship. Is he ready for that?”
Y/N sucked the frosting off her fork. “Our sixth month is soon. I’ll drop a hint. When he’s ready - if he’s ready - he’ll know I am, too.”
She’d been floating since that realization. Since admitting her devotion to Arthur aloud and thereby making it concrete. Since getting a supportive hug from Patricia. And reassurance from Matt, of all people, that she hadn’t entered a mid-life crisis.
That headiness continued as she fumbled with her keys. Upon entering their apartment, music reached her ears. Music with a faster tempo than the classics Arthur usually played. Hanging up her coat and slipping off her shoes, she recognized it as one of her “Best of Soul and Disco” LPs. She braced herself on the wall separating the kitchen from the living room, her cheeks breaking wide open.
Arthur had moved the television and its stand to the side of the coffee table. A blanket, folded into a square, lay in front of the windows. Two plates and two wine glasses were on it. As she approached, she saw sandwiches on a platter. There was pasta salad and potato salad, both covered in plastic wrap, from the deli around the corner. In the center of it all sat an empty vase.
When he came out of the bedroom, magic wand in hand, he stilled. “Oh. Hi. You’re back already?”
A giggle. “I ran.” Biting her bottom lip, she admired his tousled brown curls, feathery, light, and attractive as hell. His face was unobscured by make-up, allowing her to revel in his handsomeness. The top button of his white shirt was undone. And his yellow vest outlined his lean frame in all the right ways. He wore his usual trousers. “Did you have a gig today?”
“No.” He smoothed a palm down his chest and stomach, and she noticed he’d rolled up his sleeves. “Um, I heard you like it.”
She felt herself blush and nodded eagerly. Thank you, Patricia.
With a flick of his wrist, flowers sprouted from the end of the wand. “I wanted to do this outside. On the fire escape. But it’s too cold.” He knelt on the blanket to put the flowers in the vase.
Y/N cocked her head. The juxtaposition of him wearing his “Carnival Casual” outfit, the cutesy charm of the picnic he’d arranged with the music that was playing was ridiculous. The song went on repeatedly about miracles, need, and “sexy things.” She snorted.
As Arthur removed the cellophane from the salads, his shoulders tensed. “I wasn’t sure what you’d like,” he breathed. “I got too much.”
“No,” she replied, sitting next to him, laying a hand on his thigh. “This is wonderful.” When their eyes met, she found his look at once bashful and flirtatious.
She served the sandwiches and salads while he poured the wine, following her request to fill the glasses to the top. Mostly potato salad ended up on her plate, the mix of mayonnaise, pepper, and egg just right. A majority of the pasta wound up on his - he liked the vinegary flavor. The red wine did not pair with the turkeys on rye he’d prepared, so she saved most of it for dessert.
When Arthur held out an orange roll of paper, she was dabbing her mouth with a cloth napkin. The title made her laugh. She never would have suspected he put stock in the zodiac; she certainly didn’t. Gingerly, she opened the scroll and squinted down at it.
It described her as determined, confident, and extroverted. And called Arthur a curious, emotional introvert. While mostly true, it wasn’t quite accurate. Arthur was only introverted in personal situations, while having the courage to perform as a clown and a stand-up. Those traits could belong to anyone, depending on the situation.
But the next paragraph clued her in as to why he’d bought the horoscope. And given it to her. “You were made for each other. There are times when it’s hard to know how you both managed to ever exist apart. The bond between you is unbreakable. You have much to learn from one another.” A lump formed in her throat when she read the last line, that they’d be together until the next life. She didn’t believe in that, yet longed for it all the same. “Thank you, Arthur.”
The scroll would have been enough. Dinner would have been enough. He would have been enough. But he placed a pink, velvet necklace box on her lap. She blinked at it, hoping he hadn’t spent too much on her. Then she forced that notion from her brain - he was a grown man who could buy what he chose - and cracked it open. Her breath caught.
The heart with pressed flowers was obviously vintage. The size was demure, like her other, few pieces of jewelry. And it was exactly her style: feminine and practical. She was grateful he hadn’t gotten her diamonds or other flashy gems. Her eyes darted to his as she took it out. “This is...” Gently, he turned it over in her palm, and she saw the engraving on the back: A+S.
A+S. Arthur and Y/N. It was a bold move from him. A welcome one.
“I think that’s usually done on trees,” he said. “But there aren’t that many in Gotham.”
Chuckling, she sniffed back her tears and shoved it at him. “Here.” She turned her back towards him. His fingertips dragged along her collarbone as she lifted her hair and he latched the chain. The kiss he placed above the clasp made her shiver. Wanting him to see how the pendant rested right above her cleavage, she unbuttoned the top of her blouse.
“It’s beautiful.” She pulled him in for a kiss. Traced his crow's feet. Let her thumbs wander to the slight puffiness underneath. The wine, along with her earlier confession to Patricia, was making it easier to open up. “You have my whole heart, Arthur,” she sighed into his mouth.
His palm went to her chest as he tilted his head, his other holding the nape of her neck. The tip of his tongue slipped between her lips and warmth enveloped her. She felt his fingers play with the necklace. Heard his ragged inhalation. Knew that pride and pleasure were emboldening him, because she was wearing what he’d gifted.
Eventually, he broke their connection, told her to close her eyes and pecked her nose. She concentrated on his steps to the kitchen. The clatter of him going through the silverware drawer. And then the chill breeze of the glass door being opened.
When she was allowed to peek, she stood and followed him onto the fire escape. A lit cigarette was already between his lips, and he was lighting a candle on a gigantic slice of cake. “You’re supposed to make a wish,” he said, smoke escaping his nostrils.
She snuggled his side, snaked an arm around him as he slung his across her shoulders. After eyeing the flame a moment, she sucked in a deep breath, pursed her lips, and bent closer...
Just in time for a split-second gust of wind to blow out the candle.
Arthur groaned and started to let go of her but she stopped him. “It counts.” She lifted the fork and fed him a bite, grinning at his pleased hum. “You won’t mind me turning grey, will you?”
“No. I won’t be the only one looking old.”
She nuzzled his temple. “You don’t look old. You’re refined.”
“Sure,” he scoffed. They ate silently for a bit, but then he squeezed her tighter. “What did you...” Trepidation lurked behind his question, even after their steamy picnic. “What did you wish for?”
“That we’ll keep loving each other, even through tough times.” She lowered the fork, already full. “That I’ll like my new job.” Letting go of him, she set the plate on the metal stairs, next to his ashtray. “That you’ll be healthy.”
He huffed. “You shouldn’t have wasted any on me.”
“You’re worth all of them.” She kissed his bicep, laid her head on his shoulder. The record playing in the background turned over, switched to a slower song, and she grinned. “Now,” she said, “may I have this dance?”
Delight in his eyes, he bowed. She giggled as he grabbed her around the middle and pulled her flush against his solid frame. He led beautifully, gazing at her as if she was the only woman in the world, guiding her to the beat she was deaf to. He even dared to raise her hand for a modest twirl, and she trusted him enough for it to work.
As they spun slowly, rotating in the lights of their living room and the city, he kissed her hairline. “Happy birthday. I hope you liked it.”
“I loved it.” She captured his thin lips with her own. “Promise you’ll be here for the next twenty.”
“The next forty.” He bumped their noses and lay his cheek on hers. Y/N cuddled deeper into his embrace, feeling more cherished than she had in years.
~~~~~
Hot Chocolate - You Sexy Thing
Tag list (Let me know if you want to be added!): @harmonioussolve​ @howdylilflower​ @sweet-nothings04​ @stephieraptorr​ @rommies​ @fallenstarsabyss​ @gruffle1​ @octopus-plasma​ @tsukiakarinobara​ @arthur-flecks-lovely-smile​ @another-day-in-chuckletown​ @hhandley80​ @jokerownsmysoul​ @mrscarnival​
43 notes · View notes
halinski · 3 years
Link
Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: 9-1-1 (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV) Characters: Evan "Buck" Buckley, Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Karen Wilson, Nia Wilson Additional Tags: Asexuality, Asexuality Spectrum, Demisexuality, Sexuality, Established Relationship, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Worried Eddie Diaz, Soft Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Soft Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Sexuality Crisis, Implied/Referenced Sex, Sex Repulsion, sex repulsed buck, Internalized Acephobia, coming to terms with asexuality, Coming Out Summary:
Sex was always just a thing Buck did. It was a part of life. But once he gets together with Eddie, he's asked what he really wants, and if he even likes sex in itself apart from the intimacy and pleasing his partner.
Buck dives into Asexuality
---
big thanks to @aloha-wolves who made this possible with the support!!
----
11 year old Buck wasn't stupid. He may have been impatient and distracted and unfocused but he wasn't a complete moron. He knew how to follow social cues. 
See, when you were Different™ from the start studying human behavior and social cues was a survival strategy. He'd figured it out by then. Fairytales read by Maddie from the earliest age, and all the countless books after clearly stated some of the rules. Romance was a must. It a bond between a woman and a man that every human strived for, and when Buck saw the kids in his class at school start to focus heavily on the subject of sexuality, he knew he had to step up.his game.
Personally he wasn't intrigued by all. Not by girls or the thoughts of kisses or naked bodies. The word sex just left a bitter taste in his mouth. Like licorice. But any additional personality trait that wasn't 'normal' was a risk. Buck didn't want to be forgotten, kicked to the curb and judged. He already knew he wasn't like everyone else. He had to make sure he fit in.
Luckily, he had an older sister. So he asked Maddie, what the heck he was supposed to do about girls. She had laughed, teased him a little, but eventually saw his frustration and sat him down.
"Be bold." That's what she had said, and Buck was nothing if not adventurous and daring, seeking the thrill- anything that kept his mind from wandering and running itself into a rut. Buck knew how to open his mouth when he needed to.
Half a year later; he had his first kiss. It was uncomfortable, as most social interactions were. One could never really know what was going on inside another person's head. But Buck was determined and learned studiously (when it wasn't for school), and if he had to trade some of his time spent alone with his books or exploring the forest to be normal, so be it.
He never quite understood the desires behind it all, but he knew the steps to the dance, and he played his cards well. Maybe he was a late bloomer, but he wouldn't let anyone notice if that proved to be true. 
As the years went on... Buck just figured, maybe the feelings were too subtle for him to pinpoint. Maybe he hadn't met the right person. After all, he was a free spirit. No one quite understood him. But none of that mattered.
He knew how to tell what objectively 'hot' and 'sexy' was. He learned how to read the looks women threw him well. Then he'd discovered a whole other spectrum to sexuality and the first time he kissed a boy, his heart had fluttered in a way like never before. It hadn't turned out to be the breakthrough he'd hoped for, but Buck knew how to please. He'd studied the ways of body and mind and he knew how to make others feel good.
Buck was young. The rest would come. He was supposed to be finding himself and sleeping around, exploring and putting his looks to good use. Maybe he'd find what sex and love meant along the way.
It was just life.
(Nevermind that he always had the urge to flee after getting into a girl's pants, or that he'd used weed as an escape so much that he'd have to be high to do it for a few years. 
Nevermind that he'd have to steel himself and liked to retreat to some foggy place in his mind, where nothing mattered, nothing but physical sensations, which weren't that bad.
Nevermind that he found himself needing more and more, needing the high of peaking pleasure between him and someone else, just to mask the terrible gut feeling that built up after.
Nevermind that he started losing himself in it, losing sight of any personal goals, especially when he'd had to give up weed because of his new job.
He found some peace eventually. Between the thrill of risking his life to save others, finding family in the crew, and deciding to stay far from other people's beds.)
-
29 year old Buck was quite mature, if he could say so himself. He had finally, finally, fallen head over heels in love. So much so, that he had been afraid to act on it. He hadn't been that afraid of just a kiss since… ever. Not even his first kiss had caused him so many heart attacks and sleepless nights.
Suddenly, he was made to question everything he thought he had learned. That's how he knew it was real. He had fallen in love.
With Eddie Diaz.
He’d endured over 6 months of what he had perceived as unrequited love with his best friend - he hadn't even had a best friend for over a decade - only to find out that Eddie had actually been so painfully obvious with his own crush on Buck that the whole station knew before Buck did. See, Eddie didn’t make the ridiculous bedroom eyes while dressed in tight clothes in dim nightclub lighting. Nor did he ever invite Buck for coffee as a date. That was simply because Eddie didn’t do nightclubs and well, Buck and him had coffee and beer and dinner and lunch and breakfast and everything in between all the time together already as friends. They talked on the phone and covered each other’s meals and even bought each other groceries sometimes. (Although that last one was usually Buck on his way to Eddie's house.)
But he realized eventually that all those things he had done with Abby while dating her. The phone calls and the spending time together and doing stuff for each other. Just without the ridiculous sweet talk and the kissing and the sex. 
It was funny in retrospect.
(After Eddie had grabbed Buck’s face when he had been mumbling about all the bullshit reasons he hadn’t voiced his feelings; after he had said, “I can’t believe you’re making me make the first move"; after he had kissed Buck senseless; after they had talked about what it meant.)
Now Buck got to do everything he did before, and he got to kiss Eddie whenever he felt like it, even sneaky kisses when no one was looking at the station, and he got to hold his hand and touch, and he got to call Eddie ‘my sunshine’.
(The face Eddie made when Buck said that was priceless.)
He also got to rile Eddie up, whisper those things that made him blush cherry red, tease him with vivid images of things he’d done in South America where he’d explored the world and himself with abandon and lots of glitter. He got to make Eddie moan and shudder beneath his hands, got to watch him fall apart. He liked that.
What he didn’t like was the look Eddie sometimes gave him before Buck distracted him with his mouth. (Eddie always loved that last part.)
They were making out on the couch one late night long after a joint dinner and a movie with Chris and it was nice. It was always a good time with Eddie. Make outs most often lead to sex though and Buck didn’t hesitate to take the lead, slipping a hand beneath Eddie’s shirt to meet his abs.
Only for Eddie to grab his wrist.
Buck looked up quizzically.
"What's up?” He asked, pulling his hand back and lifting himself higher from above his boyfriend. “Not in the mood?”
Eddie blinked at him and shook his head a little. 
“No, that’s not it…. I promise,” he reassured as Buck narrowed his eyes. "We can definitely postpone that for later but first we have to-"
"Don't say talk," Buck pleaded. To no avail.
"Yes, talk."
"What is there to talk about? Everything is going great."
"Usually, I have to beg for you to shut up for once," Eddie said with a huff.
Buck easily took the bait, grinning. He leaned closer. "I love hearing you beg."
Eddie's eyebrows did a little dance and Buck knew he'd gotten his attention but unfortunately that didn't deter his boyfriend from his ultimate goal, face settling into determination again.
"But what if I were to make you beg?" Eddie asked simply.
Buck frowned.
"See, that! That's what we have to talk about."
Buck withdrew completely this time, not really sure why his anxiety was suddenly ramping up but feeling like he'd been caught cheating on a test.
"What, just because I…" He found himself unsure of what to say. He felt the couch shift as Eddie rearranged himself but Buck stubbornly stared at the carpet.
"Buck," Eddie's voice was soft and yet firm, and somehow that made it worse. He swallowed heavily.
"Do you even like this? Being physically intimate with me, I mean. The sex...and all that?" Eddie asked.
Buck scoffed, shoulders squaring up.
"Of course I do. You know I love you." It was a truth that rang bitter after the launched accusation. His fists curled and uncurled on his thighs, unable to contain his agitation.
"Yes, I know. I know," Eddie quickly said, reaching over to take those hands and smooth them out. "Hey, look at me… I know that and I love you, too. Okay?"
Buck eventually met his insistent stare and found himself breathing lighter again, when he observed his sincerity. He breathed out.
"Okay," Buck breathed and leaned in slightly in search of physical reassurance. Which Eddie gave, as always. There to ground him. He pressed a chaste kiss to his lips and ghosted a thumb over his chin when he pulled back.
"But," Eddie started up again, holding firm to Buck's hands when he tried to pull away again. "We have to talk."
Closing his eyes, Buck heaved a sigh.
"How about you just listen to me, for a sec, hm? We can start there. I'll tell you what I think is the problem and why it's important to me, my experiences and all I ask is for you to think about it. Can we do that?"
It didn't sound like a fun time. Buck knew the rules, he knew the procedures, he didn't mind those. But he didn't want to think about the feelings he was supposed to have, or about the feelings he was trying not to have. He had hoped he had done right. But obviously he hadn't. He'd messed up somewhere. 
Buck swallowed hard. 
What was he supposed to do though? Make a scene? That would reveal his weakness further. This was Eddie. It would kill him to mess this up.
"Buck," Eddie whispered and Buck steeled himself, padding his disposition with dry amusement. Of course he couldn't hide from Eddie. This man could see through him like glass and yet he did it in a way that didn't make him shatter. He was safe.
Buck nodded quickly, before his vulnerability could render him to tears before this conversation even started. Breathing in deep through his nose, he cleared his throat.
"I'll listen," he said as loud as he dared, but kept his skittering gaze away from Eddie's eyes, afraid he'd falter.
"Thank you." Eddie lifted his hands to his mouth to kiss his knuckles. There was something so tender about the way Eddie held and handled him that almost made Buck believe that he deserved it. Sometimes that warmth in his chest felt way too grand to wrap his head around but one thing was for sure: Buck was always ready to give every fiber of his being for Eddie and Chris. He was here to grow and learn and reach his best potential.
Buck leaned back against the couch and settled in, trying to relax his body as far as he could. Eddie had definitely become far more open and vulnerable with his emotions than he always claimed he’d been raised to be. And Buck definitely knew how to appreciate that. Now, it was his turn to try- or at the very least, hear Eddie out.
“You know well enough by now, that Shannon was my only relationship, ever. That it started as a clumsy teenage attempt at dating and we just clung to each other for safety. It was all a little awkward but whose first relationship isn’t? Then again, even back then I kept feeling like I was a little different from other guys, other people. When it came to love and relationships and all that. I could never understand flings and spontaneous hookups, one night stands… I would get whiplash hearing about other people’s experiences.” Eddie spoke with a calm voice. It came across resolved, as if he had found peace with his past. 
Buck on the other hand, felt like his insides were twisting themselves into a million knots as he was reminded of his similar teenage years and the conflict and frustration they had caused. There was though, also a stubborn streak of hope that shot through him like an arrow, causing Buck to glance up to Eddie from his hanging posture. The yearning for the answer to these problems was strong. Maybe Eddie could teach him about that link he was missing.
“It didn’t seem to matter that much back then. My parents were, as with everything else, traditional and conservative about relationships and sex. We didn’t talk about those things. They didn’t even show much affection to each other in front of anyone. And then, I had Shannon and things worked with her. Expectations were met and I enjoyed being with her. After highschool though… things started getting more complicated.”
Eddie’s thoughtful gaze rises to meet Buck’s eyes. Eyes that were a whirlwind of feelings Buck had never dared to fully entertain. His heart was beating so high up his throat every breath felt a little weary but Buck nodded silently for Eddie to continue.
“With the distance during college and my tours, we just grew apart. That only led to more fights and less of a bond, and I started to realize that the further away I felt emotionally, the harder it was for me to engage in intimacy. I watched the other guys react differently to their partners, or talk about attraction to strangers, and it was all just not making sense. I didn’t have the capacity at that point in time to figure things out, so I just chalked it up to the outer circumstances; trust issues from my childhood and the rigid parenting, and the… experiences while I was deployed.”
Eddie sighed, looking down at his lap for a moment before he lifted his chin again with new energy. 
“It was only in the years when Shannon had left that I eventually put two and two together. At first I was convinced I just wasn’t looking for anything because all I wanted was to be there for Chris but I mean, I was still kind of lonely. I hate that word but it is what it is,” Eddie said with a rueful smile, shrugging one shoulder. “I eventually started going online, contemplating online dating or whatever, but I somehow ended up reading up on other people’s experiences on forums and after multiple hours of rabbit holes, I came across these descriptions and solid definitions of exactly the kind of thing I felt.”
“It turns out,” Eddie emphasized, taking Buck’s hand in his again at this, “that not everyone is as obsessed with sex as society might like to make you think. There are different kinds of attraction and people experience varying levels of them. It’s all as normal as the rest, if one is more or less romantically or sexually attracted to others. I, personally, am demisexual, which means I don’t experience sexual attraction to others until I have an emotional bond with them- like with you.”
At this point, Buck was feeling ready to shatter. Every next breath threatened to break the fragile thread holding him together. There were already two tears or so that have escaped him, and Buck wasn’t usually ashamed to cry but the panic in him was too great, almost as high as the flooding relief. He didn’t know what he was supposed to believe or trust in.
Eddie squeezed his hand.
“Is this- does it make any sense? I’ve never really talked to anyone about this before, but I just wanted you to know that it’s okay. I mean, maybe I’m wrong and it’s not this at all, but I hate-” Eddie took a deep breath, “I really hate the thought of you forcing yourself to do things you don’t want to. For me. Not that I want to assume anything, because everyone implies that you would have a lot of hookups before and all that, so maybe you actually do enjoy it, and maybe we have to figure out how to make it right between us but… I do feel like there’s an imbalance, like I get more out of this. And like you sometimes kind of shut down after we do something, almost as if it… hurts you.”
Buck definitely couldn’t bring himself to look at Eddie anymore at this point, the guilt tying him heavily down to the couch. He didn’t even feel able to really respond to the light grip on his hand. It was rare to hear Eddie ramble like that, and Buck hated being the one to make him feel that way, like Eddie was doing something wrong. Like Eddie was the problem. When it was just Buck himself all along. Unable to do sex right, unable to hide the bad feelings from Eddie, unable to be open with him and forcing Eddie through this situation.
“Buck I-”
He could feel Eddie’s gaze on him, sense his sadness acutely. Buck wiped his sleeve over his face in an attempt to dry the waterfall, but his sniffles thundered in his ears regardless.
“You don’t need to say anything or do anything right now. I just want for you to be able to be more comfortable with all this one day. So, just- keep this in mind. I love you. With all my heart and soul. That’s a fact regardless of sex. We don’t need sex to lead our best lives together. I don’t want this to keep hurting you.”
A silence settled over them like weighted slime. Or maybe it was just Buck. He didn’t know how to react. It felt like it had been an hour since Buck had last said anything and he didn’t want to be a passive spectator in such an important discussion about them. After all, didn’t most people say sex was necessary for a successful, happy relationship? What if they gave it up and Eddie was wrong and they fell apart? It would be all Buck’s fault. He would never want to risk that.
“I don’t-” Buck started, but paused when he realized he had no idea what he even wanted to tell Eddie. Apparently a part of him was really considering what it would be like to give up sex. It wasn’t like he knew much about a life without it. Sure, there had been that time with Abby, where they dated without sex, and the close friendship with Eddie before they had taken the extra step toward a relationship… But sex was always the step that drew full circle.
“There are resources out there. You can read up on it and give yourself time to figure it out. But we’ll find a way together, alright? Trust me. We’ll figure this out,” Eddie assured, and proceeded to draw Buck into a hug.
Buck went along willingly, sinking against Eddie’s shoulder, hiding in his chest. He was exhausted. Just letting things rest for a while sounded good. Eddie’s hand brushed his cheek dry and then there was a soft press of lips on his temple.
"It'll be okay. I promise."
-
Buck spent the next few days keeping his distance. He needed to wrap his head around this first before he could focus on giving Christopher his all and Eddie- well, he was a little unsure about how he was supposed to act around him when the two of them were on their own. Not knowing if he might be rejected again when he started another physical advance, he was cautious about engaging anything at all.
He also spent his time alone by letting his thoughts spiral, because he couldn't get a grasp on them, and feeling horrible. Consciously thinking about sexual topics just did that, and focusing on it for days… it made him pretty miserable. He wished he could hide from himself in Eddie's arms. That usually worked. But Eddie had asked this of him and Buck couldn't just ignore that. He had to try.
Or run away again. Maybe Seattle this time. That would be different enough to distract him from missing Eddie and Christopher, and his team, Maddie…
The thought alone made him nauseous. Running away was bad. He'd done it a few times and gained from it, but he was in a much better place now. He didn't want to run away for once.
He had to confront it head on, which meant going to the person who knew best: Karen. Approaching anyone at the station was too nerve-racking after all, with all they always said about his early days at the station. So he ended up keeping it a secret, arranging a date and time with Karen while Hen was at work and he was off.
Buck had no idea how much Karen knew about his sexual exploits but he assumed Hen had shared her view of things with her. So that didn't take much of his anxiety away, but he definitely didn't want to talk to a stranger so here he was, sitting next to Karen in their living room, drinking tea. Nia was playing on the rug to their side and Buck was itching to join her instead.
"I would say speak when you're ready but you've been sitting there silently for 5 minutes already. It's the longest I've seen you quiet and it's starting to worry me," Karen said and Buck knew she was teasing. The light pressure to speak up did its job, though, giving him the freedom to spill his thoughts.
He sighed, staring into the mug between his hands.
"Eddie and I," he started. "Eddie said something recently… and I'm not sure what to think about it. A part of me… thinks he's probably right but then it's also… it also just feels impossible."
Karen's forehead creased as she gazed at him. "Are you two okay?"
Buck was quick to open his mouth to defend but then reconsidered. He shook his head.
"I mean… I hope so? I thought we were but…"
"But?"
"Eddie told me he's demisexual," Buck said, peering up at Hen. His own potential label still refused to come out.
Karen hummed.
"And you're not sure how to feel about that?" She guessed.
"No, I didn't have any problem with it. I'm glad he could tell me because I had no idea. Like, I know he was reserved about his dating and especially sex life but now I can understand why. It's more that…"
Buck lifted a hand helplessly as the words left him again. This time Karen waited patiently, gaze soft and open as he knew it to be. It was insistent though, urging him to voice what he came here for.
"He brought all that up because he thinks… he thinks I might be ace." Buck's hands tightened around his mug, though not even the warmth was much of a comfort. He felt overexposed and small, as if his body was too big for him and he didn't have all the controls.
"That hit a nerve, did it?" Karen asked softly. All Buck could manage was a tense nod. 
"You know you don't have to figure it all out at once, right?" Karen's hand settled over Buck's right one and he looked up to find her soothing smile.
"You've done this before, just in a different way. It takes time to find out every little piece of yourself. Figuring out if you're on the asexual spectrum and what it means for you and your relationship will take a while. It's something you have to work on, make yourself comfortable with before you know for sure. Maybe you'll never want to use a distinct label. That's okay, too."
Once she started addressing it specifically, Buck found he couldn't look away, eagerly drinking up everything she had to say like a desert desperate for rainfall.
"You have to allow yourself to fill this space, too. Give yourself room to breathe and be who you are. There are so many ways to be asexual and all of them are just as valid as being allosexual," she continued.
Buck breathed. "That actually is really good to hear," he said quietly, voice trembling.
"You'll be okay. You're finding to yourself. This is good," she assured him, settling back. "And you're with someone who understands, who sees you for who you are. You have support all around you."
"And Eddie and I- we can still work, right? I mean I know I read about relationships that… That- but I just…"
"Of course. Your relationship can be whatever you want it to be. You two decide that. There are no official requirements you have to meet. You make the rules," Karen interrupted.
"Okay." Buck nodded, finally relaxing enough to settle back in his chair. "I think… I needed to hear that."
"Anytime, Buck," Karen replied and he knew she meant it. His attention was already starting to wander though as relief lifted the weight off his shoulders, towards the adorable little toddler to his right.
"Now for some fun times!" He declared as he sunk down to join the girl in her game of building blocks. "Hey, Nia. Can I play too?"
Nia let out bubbling approval as she held up a yellow block at Buck. He grinned and accepted the gift.
"Aw, thanks! I love yellow!"
Nia clapped and then pointed at her construction, clearly instructing Buck on where to put his block. He obliged and she nodded eagerly, clapping for him.
"Yes! Beautiful. I can already see it. This will be the new Eiffel tower. Bigger, better," Buck marveled, letting the giddy happiness of being in such young life's presence take over him. Nia responded in turn with her own sunshine smile, holding up the next block. A purple.
"Hey, while you're at it, do you mind if you watch her for a few minutes while I go have a nice warm bath?" Karen asked, ready to seize the opportunity.
Buck turned to her with a laugh. "It would be my pleasure. I owe you one after all."
He was quick to turn back to Nia, and only peripherally noticed Karen leaving the room. 
--
That night was as good a night as any, Buck figured. If it would take him a longer time to figure it out, he might as well settle into the discomfort and make a place there. He would embrace it. It was a part of him. There was no need to make things more difficult and terrifying than they needed to be.
After a thorough workout and shower, he drove home - Eddie's house, his home - and let himself in. That was how sturdy they already were. They made living together work as if they had been doing it forever. It just felt right. That confidence was what Buck needed to take to deal with this new path.
He found Eddie in the living room, folding laundry and instead of just returning the greeting thrown at him, he immediately went in for a hug, wrapping his arms around Eddie from behind.
"Thank you," he breathed against the back of his neck, a kiss and confession all at once. 
Eddie's hands settled over his and he first only turned his head toward him.
"What's this for?" He asked, just as quietly; mellow, safe, home, love.
Buck buried his face in his nape. He didn't know how he could even put it into words. He had spent the last few hours trying to figure it out.
"For giving me the opportunity to be fully me… with the parts of me that I had forgotten- hadn't even realized they were there," he then settled on, tongue feeling especially clumsy and heart beating in his throat. He hoped his tone could convey his meaning instead. He wasn't sure how else to explain if Eddie didn't get it.
Luckily, this was Eddie they were talking about.
The man turned around in Buck's arms, forcing them to loosen for a second. Buck's eyes remained closed, even as Eddie cradled his cheeks in his palms and pressed a kiss to his forehead.
"I see you, Evan Buckley," he told him. Buck had to swallow hard before he dared open his eyes but he knew he had too, because his heart was too full to contain all emotion. "And I love all of you."
And Buck soared.
19 notes · View notes
revchainsaw · 3 years
Text
Tumblr media
Buffy: the Vampire Slayer (1997)
Season 1
Hello and Welcome back my creepy congregation! We will be taking todays service from the Big Screen into your living room for our first Personal Devotional. That's Right! We're reviewing full seasons of television series now and what better way to bring the spirit of the genre film to the idiots lantern that with the 90s Television sensation and all around love letter to the horror genre, Buffy the Vampire Slayer!
The Message
Regardless of how one may feel about Mr. Whedon we can't deny how much we love Buffy Summers and the Kids who live and die in Sunnydale! Season one of Buffy was a spin off/reboot of the earlier film and an attempt by Whedon to course correct the franchise by breathing a little charm and attention into the subject matter.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer (Season 1) focuses on Buffy Summers, a not so typical California high school student who, due to the events of the movie, has been relocated to Sunnydale High. Buffy is not just a cute, athletic, teenage girl looking to enjoy the prime of her life, though she is those things, she is also the Slayer, an anointed warrior who has been reincarnated throughout the generations to protect our vulnerable weak human world from the forces of evil; particularly Vampires. Buffy is a sort of supernatural Captain America, that is a peak human being, but instead of Nazi Science she was born with her powers.
Joining Buffy are; High School outcasts Willow and Xander (a nerd and a nice guy respectively), The ridiculously sexy librarian Rupert Giles (her mentor, guardian, high school librarian, and all around precious papa bear), Jenny Calendar (a technopagan computer teacher armed with all the mystery an ignorant 90s boomer could attribute to the internet), Angel (Spoiler: He's a Vampire, but he's a good guy. A hunky, broody, good guy vampire love interest), and her loving but entirely oblivious mother. The Scoobies as they have come to be called aid Buffy in her quest to protect Sunnydale from Dark Forces.
And Speaking of those Dark Forces, they are primarily vampires, led by the Master; an ancient vampire who resembles to some degree Nosferatu and a Bat, a look that Guillermo Del Toro would later perfect in his own series the Strain. The Master seeks to fulfill an ancient prophecy that would open the Hellmouth (a portal to hell, exactly what it sounds like) and free him in order that he and his kind should conquer the world.
The first season is fairly short consisting of the following adventures.
1. Welcome to the Hellmouth - Buffy moves to Sunnydale seeking to leave her Vampire ways behind, but the vampires just won't let her catch a break.
2. The Harvest - Vampire Shenanigans continues. Buffy learns of the Master.
3. Witch - A fellow Cheerleader is possessed by her witchy mom.
4. Teachers Pet - Buffy vs Giant Mantis
5. Never Kill a Boy on the First Date - Buffy vs the Anointed One (Not Really)
6. The Pack - Buffy vs Hyena Possessed High School Bullies
7. Angel - Buffy vs Angel but actually Darla
8. I, Robot ... you, Jane - Buffy vs Internet Demon
9. The Puppet Show - Buffy and Sid the Dummy vs Organ Harvesting Demon
10. Nightmares - Buffy has bad dreams
11. Out of Mind, Out of Sight - Buffy vs Invisible Nerd
12. Prophecy Girl - Buffy vs The Master (also Buffy Dies)
Overall the short season, while not allowing for too much world building, kept the show to a format that allowed very little filler. So although we mostly only get vampires as villains, we don't have enough time to really be bored of it. Some of the shows dynamics and cultural concerns definitely date the series but overall Season 1 of Buffy is definitely not a difficult watch, and can be enjoyed over and over again.
Let's get to the Benediction:
Best Character: Slay Girl, Slay!
As far as season one goes the titular Buffy Summers is the best character. Sarah Michelle Gellar is absolutely charismatic in the lead role and though at times she may seem selfish or reckless it makes perfect sense for the character. The character is allowed to be weak, to be selfish, and to be unlikeable. She avoids the foibles of a Luke Skywalker or a Harry Potter. She joins the ranks of primary protagonists who are not constantly outshined by their supporting cast. I believe when Buffy is sad, I believe when she throws a punch, I believe she struggles with her destiny. The only thing I don't believe is how ditsy she let's on.
Best Actor: Head's Up!
Anthony Stewart Head. Head as Giles is just fantastic. His balance of frustration with Buffy and genuinely parental concern is heartwarming and absolutely makes Giles one of the warmest father figures in television history.
Best Episode: A 'Master'ful Finale
It all builds up to Prophecy Girl and for good reason. Television shows often have mini-finale's at the end of their first seasons because the teams behind the series are not sure they will have a chance to tell more of their story. For that reason you can see just the first season of most television series and feel like you've heard the whole deal. I wish this habit was kept up in other seasons as we wouldn't still be wondering what the hell happened to Joel at the end of the Santa Clarita Diet. Buffy is no exception to this phenomenon and therefor attempted to tie up much of it's narrative in Prophecy Girl. While that often means big bads will be dispatched, I think it's a small price to pay for not winding up in a cliff hanger. Buffy and Giles just shine in this episode, Angel is given a more heroic role, Willow finally values herself as she should and Xander stops being a fucking horrible human being for once. This episode really satisfies in all areas.
Best Villain: Sweet, Sweetheart Killer
It's such a shame that Darla was killed so early on in the franchise. She is such a great presence on the screen that she overshadows all the villains that play alongside her, even the Master. I would have loved to have seen an alternate season where she offs the old coot and assumes the role of big bad much like Spike does in Season 2. Lucky for everyone that Darla is featured throughout the show in flashbacks and I hear she is even resurrected in Angel. Also, for Scott Pilgrim fans I feel like she and Envy Adams are very much sympatico. Maybe if they reboot Buffy all my dreams will come true.
I'd also like to take this time to recommend the song Angels and Darlas by Say Hi! It's pretty good.
Best Monster Design: Internet Troll!
While I can't speak for where the money in Season 1 of Buffy went, I can say that at least some decent cash was spent on both the forms of Moloch the Corruptor from the Episode "I, Robot ... You, Jane". Moloch was pretty wicked looking as a machine toward the end of the episode, he looked like a Mortal Kombat villain, but it's the green scales and ram horns the actor is sporting at the beginning of the episode that really catches the eye. In fact, I'm feeling compelled to hunt down any Moloch the Corruptor merch that may be out there on the internet. It's certainly no mystery why the demon's face is featured prominently in the theme song. It just looks great! Good job to the make up department there.
Most WTF moment: "Pack"s a Punch on Principle
While not the greatest episode in season one "the Pack" is certainly worth the watch if for no other reason than the horror is kicked up when a group of high school students under the influence of a malevolent Hyena God, decide that the School Mascot is not enough to satisfy their bloodlust turn on the principal, and yes, THEY EAT HIM. I remember being completely caught of guard the first time I saw that scene, and it kickstarted the running gag of Sunnydale high principles meeting their demise in horrific ways.
Worst Character: No More Mr. Nice Guy
When I was in college I often felt bad for Xander. The funny guy who just had no luck with women. He was sarcastic but had a big heart, and used a horny gimmick to mask his loneliness, or so I thought. But now I am older, I am wiser, I have known the touch of another human being and I have to say that Xander Harris is a really scummy fellow. I don't remember thinking so poorly and I wonder if the character develops a more nuanced view of women as the show goes on. As it stands there's barely a point in the series that Xander does not view the female cast as objects for him to enjoy or be embittered towards for one reason or another. It's not charming, it's foul. Xander Harris of season one is absolutely a terrorist attack waiting to happen, if Buffy had happened today it would be much more concerning to see someone so embittered, horny, and entitled to womens time and energy as Xander Harris. Dude is one step away from pulling an Elliot Rogers. Calm down buddy and maybe actually listen to a woman and you may find you aren't as much of a 'nice guy' as you think.
Worst Episode(s): If you're not first ...
It's a toss up on this one. Season One of Buffy is actually so short and concise that the 'Monster of the Week' episodes will have to be up for grabs as the worst episode by default, but even they are pretty watchable and don't warrant the vitriol a "worst" dub usually entails. I'd say there is not a worst episode of season one, just some episodes that aren't as good as the rest. In that vain, take your pick from "Witch", "Out of Mind, Out of Sight", or "The Puppet Show". However, I'd be doing a disservice to those episodes not to mention that each one of them takes what could just be a basic Buffy Vs (insert Villain), and does something unique and interesting with the idea. The villain of "Witch" actually turns out to be a has been cheerleader actually possessing the body of her innocent daughter to relive her glory years, The Invisible Girl is actually the victim of social cruelty, her peers disinterest in her manifesting in her condition becoming quite literal and she is picked up by the military in the end, then the Puppet show, well, it's just about the stupidest most absurd thing that could possibly happen and it's completely unafraid of that fact.
Summary:
Buffy The Vampire Slayer (Season 1) is not the most groundbreaking TV, but it is absolutely evident why the show was such a phenomenon. Season 1 is particularly rewatchable. It does not demand too much investment or attention, but it will get it from you, especially on a first viewing. It's not afraid to take itself absolutely seriously or to plant it's tongue firmly in it's cheeks. It is to a degree a product of it's time, but in many other aspects feels timeless.
Overall Grade: B
6 notes · View notes
standreamy · 4 years
Text
You can change it - BNA AU (part 3)
Continuing from my previous post about my BNA headcanon
Here my perception on how the series developed Michiru and Nazuna’s frienship and how I would work on it in my au
Nazuna and Michiru
So, first of all I want to remind that I don’t ship them and in my Au there no romantic reference to their relationship. Thought, I do want to focus on their friendship too in my headcanon and develop them a bit.  I apology in advance if I seems a bit “cruel” towards Nazuna. I don’t hate her at all and don’t want to offend anyone who like her. I am just trying to do an analysis and continue my own way what the series, in my view, didn’t finish. I think someone really start to change and improve when they hit their lowest point. That’s what I will do to Nazuna, so that the change really starts from her. People sometimes realise their mistakes but keep doing them or can’t really have the strength to fix them. The manage when they reach the worst situation. Starting... I always felt like their bond was one of the things BNA kinda... treated in a odd way, at least more in the ending.  This is my personal perception of course, but I always felt like their friendship was reciprocated but at the same time onesided.  It’s kinda weird, but Nazuna and Michiru went through a lot and their bond seemed to become weakier but at the same time they acted like friends, at least mostly from Michiru’s side.  I’m not saying Nazuna doesn’t care about Michiru, she does and it’s pretty much clear. She was being used, using her personality to twist her view.  Thought, even so there were various occasions I felt like Michiru wasn’t treated fairly and various times I felt like she was the one seeking for Nazuna and not really viceversa.  They care for each other very much, but I feel like the efforts are initiated more from Michiru’s side.  It’s partly for Nazuna’s personality and for plot, but I think it could have been important to help their friendship develop more.  I also didn’t really see an apology between them. Shirou and Michiru apologized to each other for everything, but I didn’t quite see an apology from Nazuna for like... not trusting Michiru, accusing her of acting for her own advantage... pushing kinda her away... I know, they are teens, Nazuna was being manipulated and she had also her own reasons and right thoughts. For example, that scene in episode 6 maybe had some truth in it, Michiru has flaws and she indeed tends to assume others need help and offer herself. It may has to do also not just for generosity but also for feeling better herself. And Nazuna being honest was important. But the way she let her go along was somehow manipulating too.  The efforts were all from Michiru’s side, who kept fighting for her friend’s wellbeing, even if it meant being seen as stupid or else and not taking care of herself totally. I know, some may think “Off screen she apologized” or “She wanted to protect Michiru by keeping her away”.  These are possible, but at the same time it wasn’t shown and I believe that if they were real, they would have been seen, they are really important! An apology can last few seconds and if Nazuna was worried about Michiru being involved in Alain’s affairs she would have kept her TOTALLY away and we would have seen her troubled, even if privately.  So I base more my perception on what it’s clearly seen instead than suppose some off screen scenes to justify all the flaws of their bond.  It’s okay if it has flows, it can improve! I think if BNA had a season 2, more should be seen about this. I personally feel their relationship is not complete, it still has some holes... as in the season 1 ending it seemed it was all solved but I didn’t see the solution really of their bond. It just needed more development (also ShiroMichi, just like many other relationships). I can understand there wasn’t much time or space, but anyway, I want to work on it.  That’s why as it ended the series, I made in my headcanon that their friendship is still flawed. Distance and different goals made their lives different and apart and the nature of their bond didn’t help to keep it stable.  Melissa and Shirou pointed out more times this to Michiru before Nazuna drifted apart, stating how Michiru needed to also really think about herself. Her works were overwhelming and she couldn’t run everywhere to help people (in this case, Nazuna didn’t need her at all costs as she had her own manager) if she didn’t first take care of herself. Seeing each others lesser gave Michiru time to think, mostly after her departing with Shirou to travel. In that time, even missing Nazuna, she resorted to not contacting her and waiting to see some effort from her friend instead.  That however, was a useless wait.  The very next time she finally got to see Nazuna was when she “died”. Even if Shirou revived her, rumors of her death were already going around from who witnessed it. Nazuna was one of the people to be protected as important as symbol of AnimaCity and for her popularity, so the news arrived to her quite fast.  That shook her a lot.  When Michiru was finally back, her injuries were still quite bad and during her recovery Nazuna visited. Though again, the big period of silence between them wasn’t addressed. From there, they acted like friends once again, even if there wasn’t much stability. Michiru very much understood this and her travel managed to open her eyes on a lot of things, even more to make her grow.  She didn’t try as much as before to search Nazuna. In all this the fox girl started to feel something odd... guilt? Loneliness? Empty? She didn’t really think of it and shoved away often the strange feelings she got from the situation, acting like everything was fine and how it was supposed to be.  That until the day Michiru lost one of her cubs. Nazuna was heartbroken for her friend, but she realised she couldn’t understand Michiru anymore like she used to. For her, inside, Michiru was the same as always, same stubborn, helpful, invasive teenager. The changes were there but only in that moment she started to see them.  And it drove her mind away. “Michiru was always a free spirit and even if she liked children.. when did she develop this urge to be a mother?” “Michiru was one who threw herself into anything and everything without thinking, when did she become much more... responsible?” “Michiru was always around me, even when I didn’t need or want her... when did she...left?” Seeing everything suddenly appear clearer, crude and brute made her frantic. She couldn’t accept everything changed so much without her noticing, that she was in reality so self-asserted and blind. So, in her biggest moment of denial, the same one she wanted to cheer her friend up from her depression, everything went wrong.  She knew Michiru was stronger if provoked, she used to react and fight. So she assumed the same thing would work and the same words she once used would apply again. After all, Michiru was the same exact of her younger self, right?. “Are you keeping this self-pity act so people will comfort you and you’ll feel better about yourself? So in your thoughts you won’t feel like you screwed this up?” She spoke letting out her own frustration. She helped people to feel better about herself right? Even when they didn’t need it.  She pictured Michiru answering “It’s not true! I am not trying to receive pity or make myself feel better!”  And herself answering again “Because you don’t need it. It wasn’t your fault” She wanted to help, really, but besides her own frustration with the changes and insecurity, she never could picture this situation.  Nazuna liked kids but never really thought too much of having her own, she didn’t even think about it being possible being an idol and THAT was her biggest goal. She wasn’t really the type who would think of setting down.  While Michiru, adventure lover, who she never really pictured in that way (maybe because inside she always felt like Michiru would just follow her) ended up doing it. Wanting a family so badly and actually realising it. She realised too late she screwed up. Badly. When she looked at Michiru’s expression, in her eyes that sparkled for the first time in weeks a different emotion than desperation: hate.  She never saw that look on her friend’s face, not towards her at least. Perhaps it wasn’t hate, but for sure there was anger, betrayal... She could clearly read in her eyes something was over. Michiru, for the first time, just left. She wasn’t waiting for Nazuna to search her, to go after her. She wasn’t taking a break to then go back at the fox.  She left totally.  ... In the headcanon they won’t talk or meet each other directly for years.  Even if the ghost of their friendship is still present for Michiru, she moved on. Still keeping in her heart their song indirectly, singing it to her kids even if she didn’t want to think of Nazuna specifically.  Nazuna instead is haunted by this ghost. as her loneliness grow the success does, but her happiness is never complete.  Time was enough to think about things and she realised her mistakes, aknowledged them, but never found the spark to actually try and fix things.  She had success, she had fans and people who believed in her importance, but she was alone.  Michiru did a job in the shadows, one that protected people whom maybe didn’t know who was their savior and helper and felt happy that way. She had no people acclaiming her, but she had a loyal and loved companion and her kids; a family. She had friends and people to be close to, to confess her weaknesses, her doubts, to support and to help, with whom she could carry on and share experiences.  She realised how she treated her friend, how she was wrong and how she changed.  She kept delaying her apologies as she knew somehow Michiru would always seek for her and she would have time. Now it was too late.  Things changes when one night, years later, she found a kid after a party. The kid just showed up.  She asked if he was alright but he asked back the same question, somehow feeling she was really the one who wasn’t. She was shocked of course but covered it up asking if he was lost and who his mother is.  He didn’t answer on that (Will go back to this point later on for the reason) but he retorted she appeared like someone who tried to help to be recorded or something.  This made her laugh somehow, but then admitted that even if in past she would have made something like this, now she didn’t want to and wouldn’t even need it. She had enough of what she wanted.  She asked for a name, and this time finally she got a response ”Henko” (Nazuna didn’t ask Michiru which names she liked for her eventual kids, another point on how their friendship had holes, in this case on Nazuna’s side) Nazuna didn’t know what to do with the kid, they were in a safe park but why was a kid there at that hour? She didn’t know what to do. So she settled with starting a conversation, asking which animal he could shift to. At that question he seemed uneasy and didn’t answer, just stating that he hurted someone he cared about, created some problems and was now around searching a solution.
Feeling familiar with the situation, she explained why she was there. She felt kinda silly to vent to a kid, but he was listening and somehow she felt a strange feeling around him.  She talked about how she made a mistake, many mistaked towards someone and never made effort to fix them. With low voice she added "Even a kid is pulling himself up and working to fix things while me... instead... I’m such a mess...” the kid thought for a moment, he said his mom sang a song to him when he felt alone or unsure and that she told him often singing this would turn bright the stars so he could find the way again.  After some silence, Henko’s voice started singing in the hair. 
“Totsuzen ni mō Up side Down... Sekai wa kawari dasu...”
she froze.
“Inori mo todokanai... Boku ga kawari dasu” His voice... “Imi o motomete hashiri tsuzukete... Jibun ga dare ka wakaranaku naru... Naki-sōdakedo maketakunaikara”
She turned her head to him. The sun was rising. “Oshiete Yoru ni haseru kono yurameki to Omoinomama ni tobimawatte Motto jiyū ni kakete ikou yo Hoshi o miagete sa” There was no way... but everything was so filling into pieces. She just KNEW it inside, even if she couldn’t believe it.  He stopped singing, surprised a little by her expression, but then smiled sweetly “You seemed sad, but I think there is a star for everyone! It’s never too late to follow it!” She thought she wanted to become a star for people, but perhaps... Work in progress.... Still projecting the rest!!
25 notes · View notes